October 22nd 2077 This is the personal terminal of Dr. Joseph Wright Director and head of the Vault 815 experiment, logging for all future events.
Objective of the Vault: Study human behavior when normal subjects are given absolute authority over their peers
Hypothesis: In a close environment, a minority population with absolute authority over a majority will always lead to a brutal authoritarian regime. This can be useful in rebuilding America after the bombs to quickly build an efficient autocracy regardless of skill of the lower classes.
Preparation Phase: 80 residents were randomly selected through a series of standard interviews given to every control vault to determine admittance to Vault 815, as well as a behavioral analysis and an IQ test. 20 candidates out of said 80 residents who score low in IQ and high in aggression will be chosen to become a part of the “Security Team”. The Security Team will have complete authoritarian control of the vault, and will be tasked with keeping everything in complete order. The candidate that scores highest on aggression will be chosen to be the Overseer, which is now currently a 38 year old Caucasian male named Justin Davis, a veteran recently discharged from Anchorage due to a friendly fire incident involving a deserting soldier. On October 10th 2077, the candidates for the Security Team were brought to Vault 815 for a multi-day orientation. I, under the guise of an anthropologist, told them that in all of our research we found that most vaults would quickly destabilize socially without strict rationing, schedules, and cooperation from the rest of the residents. I was sure to emphasize just how important their jobs were, to give them a sense of urgency in controlling the vault as efficiently as possible.Of course, I used
Each resident was also given a “Security Team’s guide to dissidence, a Vault-Tec How To guide”, which was specially authored to teach the new security team how to prepare against any possible dissatisfaction that comes from the other 60 participants that will be joining the experiment. The guide exaggerates exactly what “dissidence” is, and encourages guards to break up gatherings, to oversee work and “use their own judgment” when deciding how to increase productivity. The Security Team were also shown their rooms, spacious 20x20 square foot rooms with king sized mattresses, all with their own personal showers, bathrooms, refrigeration units, climate control, and mood lighting that can be operated by the residents. All the rooms will be connected the a garden that will be tended by the vault’s Mr. Handy units. A concession stand will be put in the garden that will hand out snacks for the Security Team to enjoy in their off time. The snacks are laced with psycho, and buffout, to increase aggression and alertness
This is in stark contrast to the rest of the vault. The 60 other residents, who will henceforth be known as “Workers” will be divided into 30 rooms, sharing a bunk bed in a 5x10 room, that has enough space for a sink, a toilet, and a small communal desk with 2 chairs. The lights and air conditioning are controlled by a central control panel only accessible to the Security Team. As per the worker schedule, they are allotted 2 hours of personal release time in their own atrium. The atrium is deliberately painted dull, and lifeless, with 7.62x51mm machine gun turrets on full display, constantly aimed at the workers. The overseer’s office will look out to the Atrium, a constant reminder to the workers that they’re always being watched
Justin Davis, the new overseer, was given special orientation involving a personal tour of the vault, all the while we poked and prodded him for questions, massaging his ego, telling him how good of an overseer he was going to be. We applauded his exemplary IQ and showed him falsified documents proclaiming that he was chosen due to his cool collective nature and decisive action. We even congratulated him on “putting down that retreating commie who turned tale at the battle of Anchorage” and admired his bravado. We ended the tour by showing him the armory, which ranged from basic 10mm automatic pistols to advanced riot gear and crowd suppression technology, such as tear gas, and assaultrons designed for incapacitation.
On October 11th 2077, began physical training day. The Security Team were given physical and firearm training by Justin, who was more than happy to begin his role as a leader in the Vault. All things considered, Justin did well. There was an incident at the shooting range where one of the lower ranking Security Team members, Julianne Valdez, was reportedly “Limp Wristing” a 10mm automatic pistol, which caused Justin to verbally berate and physically assault her. Overall, the experiment team is very pleased with the results, and commendations were given to Justin for his strict discipline.
The Security Team was also given time to get to know the facility and get comfortable utilizing our active oppression systems, and were all told that above all else, it was critical that they follow the instructions of the overseer, since they know best. There were a few whispers of ethical concerns, but a short trip into the Security Team’s relaxation spa seemed to quell fears, which coincided with listing penalties for any officer a part of the Security Team who fail to appropriately use their authority to ensure vault productivity. At the end of the 2 day orientation, all 20 subjects were given welcome baskets of various dried meats, canned salted fish, and Nuka Cola. Naturally, Overseer Justin was given a disproportionately large bag compared to the rest of the team, which included champagne.
At this point, the Security Team is oriented, prepared, and eagerly awaiting their luxuries down in Vault 815. The 60 workers who were not given any sort of orientation were mailed postcards, simply letting them know that their place in Vault 815 was ready, and prepared for their future. Everything is green, I am certainly proud of my amazing team for everything going so smoothly. Should the heavens fall, we shall be down below, achieving science. Forwarding the green light status to our local Vault Tec HQ. With how everyone at Headquarters talk, I fear we have barely scraped by on our “deadline”.
This concludes my first terminal entry for the Vault 815 experiment. This is Dr. Wright logging off.

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Post 5
'Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation.”' (Matthew 26:41a)
Two years ago, during my student years, I was living in a guest home. It was during covid, so there wasn't much else you could do. I felt lonely and frustrated, because it felt to me as if I was locked up. I had almost zero social interaction. My days were mostly filled with pointless activities: I did my best to enjoy myself as much as possible, by engaging in porn, games and films. While my host parents had long since turned off the lights in the house, I was still doomscrolling behind my PC. Until the middle of the night I was busy using up my dopamine supply for the day, looking for the perfect movie, the perfect pic. In many cases it was 2 AM, sometimes even 3 AM, before I turned off the night lamp on my desk. I was exhausted, while I hadn't done anything productive that day.
But, hey, there was still one thing I had to do that I was about to forget. Getting down on my knees and thanking God for everything He had given me that day, praying for protection this night and for forgiveness of my sins. After that I would have to read the Bible, namely the part that was next in order.
Wasn't that bothersome? I was already so tired from my 'nighttime activities' and now I had to focus my attention on prayer and reading God's Word. It led to me rushing through it and then rolling over on one ear, only to discover late in the morning that I had slept through the alarm. Btw, sometimes I spent even longer in bed watching porn. Sometimes I didn't even remember what I had prayed because my brain was so battered by the overload of dopamine hits that basic functions like memory and reasoning seemed gone.
What could I have prayed for if living with God had been more of a priority at the time? What if I had guarded more against sin? I not only ruined my personal development, but also my relationship with God. Because I didn't need God, my desire was to satisfy my fleshly lusts, and vice versa. I should have watched and prayed lest I fall into temptation. I didn't. It now teaches me the lesson that personal prayer, personal quiet time is of vital importance. It is the heartbeat of all your time spent. A life close to God, in dependence on Him, protects us from so much evil.
Maybe you recognize yourself in my story. Maybe it also holds up a mirror to you. That's why I wanted to write something about it in all simplicity. I would like to say: we cannot relive the past, but we can learn from our mistakes. “Watch and pray lest you enter into temptation.” Give the Lord the best part of your time, the best part of the day. Ask every day for His protection and preservation from sin. When you encounter a trigger or urge, pray against it, fight against it. The Lord hears you and He wants to help you in the hour of temptation.
(To be continued)
God bless!

A couple of years ago I tried writing my own version of Stones Abbigale. I never got past the first couple scenes, but I'm considering returning to it. I wanted to basically rewrite and change up a lot of things, mainly focusing on Abbi and Davis and changing some elements. Let me know what you think!

1
It's almost four in the morning and Seth is threatening suicide again. Good. Fuck him. I hope he does it. I don't text him that because I read about this girl who told her boyfriend to kill himself. The irony was that when he actually did it she got charged with second degree murder. My life is fucked as it is I don't need to make it worse. It's almost two in the morning and I have to be up for school in a few hours. I’m shivering under my comforter because we’re halfway through November. I think about the turkey that won't get made this year and the family I won't see. I think that's swell. Seth is still texting.
Its like u dont even care after everything that happened and after everything we did together i saved ur life and i stayed with u when u cried and i hugged u and i did everything for u but that wasn't enough was it? i try so hard and all u ever are is a bitch to me that's not fair u want me to die and u hate me and u dont even care and im sick of it abbi why is is so hard for u to care about me?
I don't respond. I don't like how I feel about this. This should be easy. He won't actually do it. He won't. He’s too self involved to kill himself. I put my phone face down on my bed. The sheets shake around it as he sends message after message. I was sleeping on a ticking bomb so I got off of it. My feet stick to the floor, I struggle to step. I might as well have been standing barefoot on ice. I trudge to my window so I can see my street at night. Winter is really coming. You can't hear as many birds as you used to. They've all gone. They've all flown away. I can see three streetlights from where I’m standing. If you can from right to left you can see the concrete fracture into the sand. I open my window and brace for the chill. I stick my head outside. The ocean is not far away. I hear it hitting the shore over and over. Waves of water splashing incessantly, almost beating out my text notifications. The street lights flicker. I think of last summer. When Seth and I got really high after the news broke that my Mom was cheating on my Dad. I was making out with that bong. Emptying bowl after bowl, clanking the glass on the road to empty it out. Just thinking about it makes me feel the street pole against my back again. I was laughing and crying. Seth leaned in and hugged me. “I’m a sure thing,” he said. “I love you and I always will.” I caught my reflection in his sunglasses. I looked awful. I shiver at the memory. My phone is still buzzing. I try to catch my breath. I shut my window and start to walk back to my bed. A room always looks different in the dark. Maybe you think you know where you are, but there is always something that can jump out at you on the floor. Like a ghostly paper bag or a vengeful shoe. Objects that seem to move on their own with the sole drive of tripping you. I crawl back into bed. There's the phantom of Dad’s snoring . I know he's not sleeping in his room, he fell asleep on the couch after finishing his seventh fifth. Sometimes my brain fills in the gaps so I can hear it everywhere. Funnily, I haven't actually heard him snore since Mom left. That's the one thing I ever heard them fight about. Before she turned out to be a whore, I guess. BZZT.BZZT.BZZT. I can't bring myself to read any of his messages. They're coming so fast all the paragraphs are lost to motion blur. Seth’s arms wrap around me and I think about the beating of his heart and the warmth of his lips against my skin. I open up the texts, ready to respond.
I love you
I text this over and over until I fall asleep.
Davis was the only senior on the bus. Somehow, everyone else had a car or a ride. It’s all right, though. James would probably give him one if he had a car, but he skated to school every morning. That's why he barely ever rode the bus with him. The bus thumped along the under paved roads. Davis forgot his earbuds at home, so the only music that accompanied him was his racing thoughts. Two sophomore girls popped their heads over. “Ohmigod, Davis!” One of them shrieked.. “As I live and breathe,” he smiled. “Nice,” she said. “I’m so excited to see your finished painting.” Davis took the lower level art class for a requirement. Like most things, he's not taking it very seriously. For their pop art unit, he's painting a portrait of the art teacher with a warthog face. It's one of his funny disruptions. He knows Mrs. Stanley is going to have a real field day with it, but it doesn't matter. Artistic liberties, he’d profess. “She's such a bitch, isn't she?” The sophomore girl turns to her compatriot, who only nods in response. “She's just jealous,” Davis says. “It must be depressing to teach art and see the youth soar above her.” “For sure,” the girl doesn't get it. Class clown is a semi-heavy burden. Davis doesn't really feel like talking to these girls, but his position demands it. Comedy informs everything about him. To the giant thrift store jeans, to the loud Hawaiian shirt. He and James are the ultimate combination, at least he likes to think so. Quiet brooding begs for bright distraction. The girl is still trying to talk to him and Davis is saying his preprogrammed lines. The bus stops in front of James’s street. Surprisingly, James is standing there. “Like I’m this close to just filling my hydroflask with vodka, yaknow?” says the chick. Maybe she's just trying to get a rise out of him. “Better be prepared to give me more than a sip,” Davis is watching James grumble towards the bus. The sun is beating down on the forming ice puddles. James stomps through them with small shattering steps. James turns up the bus aisle and plops in the seat next to Davis. Davis’s smile is genuine now, but he fights it from getting too wide. “Crash your vehicle?” Davis asks. “Something like it,” there's something off with him. Davis doesn't want to push it. “Well damn, hope insurance covers it,” Davis wants James to break and laugh. Is it just another mood or did something actually happen this time? “It won't, I got bad credit,” James grins and it's like heaven. “What's the move for you today?” “Surviving art and physics for me,” says Davis. “Those bastards love to keep me down.” “Who doesn't,” James eyes the girls who have since returned to whatever they were doing before. It's the judgement stare, as Davis calls it. James likes to observe his peers like a zoo-goer. Breaking them down to taxonomic types. Davis likes to think that James doesn't do this to him, but he knows he probably does. “It sucks you decided to be bad at school and take baby art,” James is still dissecting the sophomore girls down to their tropes. “We could have done Art II together.” “I wouldn't want to get between you and Alex. I know how you love it when people piss in jars next to you.” “That's disgusting,” James breaks his glare at the girls. “It's performance art, it's beautiful,” Davis gets up out of his seat to yell. “Everyone witness the wonderful work of Alex Madov! Disengage yourself from the shackles of capitalism by shouting with me: Poopy, pee pee, poop!” Davis gets a few chuckles from the other kids on the bus. “Sit down, fatso,” mumbles the bus driver. “I will not be silenced! I’m a messenger of the good word, sir!” “More of this shit and I’m skipping your stop!” “Fine, but I will make Alex remember on the day of judgement,” Davis sits back down. James is full belly laughing. “You're so retarded,” James wheezes. Davis can't even come back with a response. He's high off of it.
The bus pulls into the school lot with a short stop. The mobs get up and begin to race out. Davis follows James down the line. “You know Abbi?” James asks. Davis feels a little pit form in his stomach, but he doesn't change his expression. “Vaguely, what about her?” “She's in my art class,” James begins. “And I think … well you know, I’m going to talk to her.” He walks down the steps and out the door. “Doesn't she have a boyfr-” before Davis can descend the driver's arm blocks him. “I’ve had enough of your shit, kid,” he says. “If you keep being obnoxious, I’m gonna find a way to make you pay for it.” James looks back, but he can't stay. Davis knows that he's gotta get to class. James does a little wave goodbye and Davis salutes him. “Are you even listening to me?” the bus driver seethes. “Yes, sir. Divine retribution, got it.” Davis ducks underneath his arm and exits the bus. James has already disappeared into the crowd.
I pass the bong to Ashley. She starts another bowl. She’s the transport and I provide the material. The little things that keep our friendship afloat. I look at the clock in her car. “It's 8:45,” I pick a piece of bagel out of my teeth. “So that's it, we officially missed first period,” Ashley tops it off. “They won't mark us, you know. It's a study.” “Yeah, but when's the last time we signed in? I heard they're changing the policy again. Do you still have the lighter?” I toss it to her. I don't get it. It's always her idea to pick me up so we can smoke before school, why now is she suddenly caring about attendance? “We're pretty girls, we can get out of it. I’m next,” I tap on the clock. “Are you sure it's not fast?” She shakes her head as she takes a snap. We're parked in the pond area a block or two from the school. It's our designated smoking spot. I like it, even at the end of fall it's pretty. I’m so engrossed that I don't realize her tip out the bowl and put it back in the cup holder. “I don't know if it's wise to keep up the activity, we should probably get going soon,” she starts up her car again. “Okay,” I say. She reverses and swings out of the lot. We lean into the silence and it's super weird. “Seth texted me last night,” I wait for her reaction. “Oh,” she grimaces. “What did you say?” “That I loved him.” Silence again. Ashley's trying to put together something well-meaning while understanding that I’ll probably ignore whatever she has to say. “Abbi, I’m not trying to tell you how to run your life, but …” Her expression is now quizzical. She's said what she is about to say a number of different ways all ready. She thinks and thinks and decides to say nothing. Good call, I would have screamed at her. Not because what she thinks about my situation isn't true, I’m just in a ‘screaming at people mood’ because of it. “I’m going to dye my hair again,” she changes the subject to avoid conflict. Classic Ash. “Oh yeah? What color this time?” “I don't know,” she checks her reflection in the rear view. “The red has faded out, maybe blue or pink this time.” “You should go with a softer pink,” I say. “Since you're a soft spring.” “Yeah, maybe.” We enter the school lot. “Listen, do you want to get together when I do it? Maybe you can dye your hair too.” “I don't know, I might be busy,” I say. “Seth might want to do something,” I pause for her to protest. “Okay,” she says. She parks and we get out.
I barrel into art class. I don't care if I reek, out of all the teachers I can tell Mrs. Stanley smokes the most. It would be hypocritical of her to care. It looks like I’m the first one. Weird. I check my phone. It's 8:45. Well, fuck. Looks like Ashley needs to fix her clock. Mrs. Stanley is at her desk. She looks at me knowingly. “Eager to create today, Abbi?” I just nod and sit at my desk. I’m really feeling it. I open up my precalc notebook and just start sketching. Birds, eyes, trees, whatever. Kids start coming in. Their chatter echoes around me, I try to focus on what I’m doing. Someone bumps into my table. I look up. It's this lanky blonde kid, I think his name is James. He presses his hands underneath the desk as he leans up to talk to me. “Eww!” He shouts. Some kids turn and laugh. I don't. I just stare at him. James goes red and sits next to the kid who pissed in a jar. Once an adequate amount of students are in the room, Mrs. Stanley starts her lesson slideshow. On the screen is a dirty urinal. “How many of you are familiar with this work by Marcel DuChamp?” she asks. At this point, Jason, the designated meathead jock, enters the room. “Sorry I’m late, Mrs. S,” he booms. He looks at the slide. “We building bathrooms today?” Mrs. Stanley glares at him. “Wouldn't you like that? Considering you spend all of your time in there.” “Whatever,” Jason brushes his mullet behind his ears. “No, not whatever. Would you like me to move you into the sophomore class with Davis? Believe it or not he's getting much better marks than you are getting in here.” Jason rolls his eyes and takes his place in the chair next to me. “Up to a little extra curricular activities before art, Abbi?” he motions a joint in his fingers. I scoff and go on my phone. There's another text from Seth.
sorry about last night
and
im reading it all right now that was fucked im sorry
I start to respond, but before I can Mrs. Stanley outstretches her hand. “Give me your phone, Miss Hagerty. I’m sick of giving you warnings.” I don't have the energy to fight, I just give it to her. “You can pick it up at the end of the day.” My jaw actually drops. Jason must have really set her off, she's not usually such a cunt to me. “Anyways, found art. What is it? Well, found art is the use of everyday objects to convey an altered meaning. It can be something you find on the street or something that once held value to you. For example, My Bed by Tracey Elim.” She pulls up a picture of a messy bed that looks suspiciously like my own. “So for your final unit of the semester, you will be making your own found art. I really want you to take this project a little more seriously than most of you have been taking this class. I’m giving you the privilege of picking your own partners, but I’d like to remind you to be thoughtful with your choice. This will be worth more for your grade.” I look around. I don't have any friends here. I toy around with the idea of asking Jason for convenience and he looks like he's about to pull that move. Behind me there's that James guy. He’s sheepishly looking at me. He seems kind of nice. Okay. I don't feel like getting up so I just turn around in my chair. “Hey James, wanna be partners?” He balks a bit and then smiles at me. “Yeah, totally,” He's beaming and it's somewhat endearing. Alex and I switch seats and now I’m next to him. “I’m gonna be real with you …” I begin. He stops and shifts a little. “I have no idea what we're supposed to be doing for this.” He regards me oddly. Like he's trying to piece me together. It doesn't bother me. “She said we have to bring in an object that's special to us and present it artistically basically,” he rubs his chin. Damn, I must be baked to hell. I didn't hear her saying that at all. “So got any stuffed animals we can cut up and make Lovecraftian monstrosities out of?” “I got a hamster cage, hold the hamster,” I say. It comes out kind of weird and I probably sound stupid, but he doesn't seem to care. “Let's make a fucking zoo.” “Perfect!” He’s kind of cute actually. In a way. Something about this feels fun. I realize the bell will ring soon. “So um,” I rip out a page of my precalc notebook, still fresh with my drawings. I scrawl out my number and push it to him. “Call me so we can figure out the project some more.” I pack up all my stuff and start to head out. I can feel him watching me and it's not that bad. “I sure will,” he says. Everything feels really groovy. There's a lightness now. I’m halfway out the door when I remember my phone. I can't believe that I just forgot about Seth. I think about begging for my phone, but I feel too above that. Still, something shakes the good feeling as the bell rings.

BLUF

• Play style: MILSIM
• Times: Global
• Alignment: UEE/Lawful
• Age: 18+
• Discord: Join Here

Blackhawk Defense Force

Are you ready to embark on an epic journey among the stars? Look no further than the Blackhawk Defense Force. We are an UEE-aligned organization that has a welcoming community. Whether you’re brand new to the verse or a veteran, we have a place for you amongst our ranks.

Our Vision

We strive for excellence in competitive play through training with the goal of protecting the UEE from any opposition they may face.

About Us

Our operations cater globally. We have 3 Defense Fleets (DF) catering to pilots:

• 1DF: for our members from the Americas
  
• 2DF: for our members from Europe and Africa
  
• 3DF: for our members from Oceania and Asia
  

Each Division has 4 departments

• Battle Group: These members are fearless. Operating and maintaining Capital and sub capital ships to bring us to new worlds with a mighty force!
  
• Air Group: These members have to have nerves of steel. Flying fighters and manning gunships to deliver a fast and unstoppable Air and Space force.
  
• Marines: The Marine only does 3 things and they are masters of their craft. 1) Kill all who oppose the organization, no matter the enemy or environment. 2) Control any war domain with the great lethality. 3) Choose the best flavor of Crayola. Don’t mess with the Marine.
  
• Logistics: The life-blood of the organization. These members are the reason the other 3 departments can succeed. Through rearming battle cruisers, giving marines their gear and crayons, construction of FOBs, and gathering of materials for research and development
  

What we offer

MILSIM:

We offer a Military Simulation (MILSIM) experience by offering rank progression, training, awards and decorations, strategic planning with tactical movements, and organizational structure.

Active Community:

Engage with like-minded citizens who share your passion for exploration and adventure. Our community is active, supportive, and always ready for action.

Weekly Events:

Dive into the action with our regularly scheduled events. Whether it's a thrilling space race, a cooperative mission, or a friendly meet-and-greet, there's always something happening in the Blackhawk Defense Force.

How to Join

Ready to don the Blackhawk insignia and take to the stars? Visit our organization page on the RSI website and hit that 'Join' button. Our recruitment officers are standing by to welcome you. Fly high, fly proud!
Active Community: Engage with like-minded citizens who share your passion for exploration and adventure. Our community is active, supportive, and always ready for action.
**PvP Training/Events: We frequently “Practice like we play” for PvP. Be either in world events like Jump Town, scheduled org vs org, or non-schedule in game scenarios, we stand at the ready to defend the UEE against players who jeopardize their wellbeing.
Weekly Events: Dive into the action with our regularly scheduled events. Whether it's a thrilling space race, a cooperative mission, or a friendly meet-and-greet, there's always something happening in the Blackhawk Defense Force.

How to Join

Ready to don the Blackhawk insignia and take to the stars? Visit our organization page on the RSI website and hit that 'Join' button. Our recruitment officers are standing by to welcome you. Fly high, fly proud!

I went to an all boys school in South London and it was fucking brutal. I basically consider myself to have had an experience akin to 5 years in prison. Violence was part and parcel of daily life, no one was safe, popular or not. Unlike most schools where a few kids get bullied, everyone got bullied by everyone else. I saw some pretty nuts things, people being dragged off a toilet mid shit and attacked, someone having their leg stamped on and snapped deliberately, someone having both their front teeth kicked out during a fight over a £2 coin and then continuing to fight over the money with his teeth on the floor, someone getting stabbed in the face with a piece of glass giving him lifelong injuries, people having daily "belt fights" where a group of people would whip eachother with their belt buckles and the last man standing wins, people being strangled with their ties to the point of passing out, someone getting their kneck crushed between 2 desks with 4 people on either side pushing as hard as they could, literally almost killing him. Many people carried knives and there were at least 2 incidents of stabbings on school grounds, one of them serious. There would be mass corridor riots probably once a week where even teachers would be attacked. There were organised fights on which people could even place bets. Sometimes teachers would intimidate or attack students for not reaching target grades. The way the school was run was extremely corrupt, they would do anything to inflate ofsted grades and did not care about people being bullied etc. A firework was once detonated during assembly and then again at break in a crowd of people knocking several of them to the floor. There were people actively involved in gang life and some went to prison for things like murder (outside of school). One guy in my tutor group who was actually a nice bloke now carries a gun and has been shot and also shot at people. There was 1 guy in the year above me who went to prison for 4 years because he got caught trying to join ISIS in an ICT lesson.
I could go on for ages about some of the things but those are the ones that come to mind. I have some good memories and lifelong friends from that time but it's also had a negative impact on me. I'm incredibly conflict averse as I fear violence. I'm also incredibly sexually and romantically inexperienced at 22 because I became used to not being around girls and women my age and don't really know how to interact with them outside of a platonic friendship.
know this isn't technically a uni based question but I thought this would be a good group of people to ask.

For a little bit more context; this sensation has been happening for about 4 days at this point.
Male. Age: 30, weight 145. Vegan and moderately active with good blood pressure and no prior history of injury or illness (but I work a desk job)
Onset happened after I fell asleep on the couch with my legs criss-crossed (monk style) for several hours. Upon waking up my saddle area was very sore and I had pins and needles. Went away initially after walking around and stretching.
Day later and up until today, every time I sit down whether it’s on the couch or my ergonomic office chair I get a strange skin-surface prickling feeling on the inside of my left thigh near the groin and down to mid-thigh.
The sensation goes away immediately if I stand up or lay down in a supine position. I have no weakness in the leg as far as I can tell and no changes to my gait.
No pain either, just a weird tingling that almost reminds me of the feeling of getting your leg hair compressed by a weird fabric or when wearing skinny jeans. And again ONLY when sitting.
The Internet keeps recommending me neuralgia parasthetica but it is very specifically not that. It only occurs on the inside and back of my thigh not the top or outside.
Looking for any advice and possibly a recommendation for a certain specialist I should see and if whether or not it’s urgent enough to go to ER.

For a little bit more context; this sensation has been happening for about 4 days at this point.
Male. Age: 30, weight 145. Vegan and moderately active with good blood pressure and no prior history of injury or illness (but I work a desk job)
Onset happened after I fell asleep on the couch with my legs criss-crossed (monk style) for several hours. Upon waking up my saddle area was very sore and I had pins and needles. Went away initially after walking around and stretching.
Day later and up until today, every time I sit down whether it’s on the couch or my ergonomic office chair I get a strange skin-surface prickling feeling on the inside of my left thigh near the groin and down to mid-thigh.
The sensation goes away immediately if I stand up or lay down in a supine position. I have no weakness in the leg as far as I can tell and no changes to my gait.
No pain either, just a weird tingling that almost reminds me of the feeling of getting your leg hair compressed by a weird fabric or when wearing skinny jeans. And again ONLY when sitting.
The Internet keeps recommending my neuralgia parasthetica but it is very specifically not that. It only occurs on the inside and back of my thigh not the top or outside.
Looking for any advice and possibly a recommendation for a certain specialist I should see and if whether or not it’s urgent enough to go to ER.

As a student navigating the ever-evolving landscape of academia, I've often found myself overwhelmed by the sheer volume of essays and assignments that pile up on my desk. It's during these moments of academic stress that I've turned to innovative solutions, one of which is the utilization of AI essay writers. In this article, I'll delve into the advantages and disadvantages of employing such technology, drawing from my own experiences and research.
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However, it's essential to acknowledge the limitations and potential drawbacks of relying too heavily on AI essay writers. One significant concern is the risk of plagiarism. While these programs are designed to generate original content, there's always a chance that the output could resemble existing material, leading to accusations of academic dishonesty.
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In conclusion, the decision to use an AI essay writer is a personal one, contingent on individual circumstances and preferences. While these tools undeniably offer convenience, efficiency, and potential learning benefits, they also pose risks such as plagiarism, stunted writing growth, and financial investment. As with any academic resource, it's crucial to approach AI essay writers with caution and use them judiciously, supplementing rather than replacing traditional writing practices.
For those considering utilizing such services, I would recommend exploring reputable platforms like SharkWriter.ai, which prioritize quality, originality, and user satisfaction. However, I urge fellow students to exercise diligence, maintain academic integrity, and view AI essay writers as supplements rather than substitutes for their own writing efforts.

Hi friends. 33F for reference. Biggest symptoms pre-cortisone were groin pain, pretty bad muscle tightness all around the front of my right thigh and glute area, stiffness, and weakness/instability.
I had a cortisone injection 4/18 and it helped immensely - my pain is way less and I've been able to actually make progress in PT this time around. I haven't been able to gain strength in my glute for years, since long before I was having actual symptoms of FAI/labral tear. But after just 4 weeks, my physical therapist (the same one I've been going to for years) has noticed a difference when she strength tests me. This is all amazing. I still have some groin pain, especially in certain positions and with certain activities. Going from sitting to standing still causes tightness and pain, but it wears off after a while.
However, I realize that cortisone doesn't last forever. For those of you who've had good results with cortisone, how long did it last? Google tells me the relief can last 4-6 weeks. Longer, if the inflammation doesn't return.
How often does this cortisone + PT/strengthening actually resolve the symptoms for a long time/permanently?
Right now, I wouldn't say I'm modifying too many of my daily activities, but I am careful with what I do and there are some things I'd like to do (ride horses, for instance) that I don't think would be a great idea. I also worry what happens if/when I get pregnant - we're not trying yet, but...that's definitely in the plan.
What keeps going through my head is that I'm at a good point in my life to go through with a surgery like this. I work a desk job that can be done mostly from home once I run out of sick time to use for FMLA, I have good insurance (through this December, anyway), I do not have a pet that requires too much work, no children to run aftetake care of, good support system to help me in recovery...But is it stupid to opt to move forward with surgery if your pain levels aren't terrible after cortisone?

Worked 4 hours on QB yesterday. Started off with this error when opening company file: “Something’s not right. We’re unable to complete your request.” and ended with QB stuck on an activation loop after the support agent deleted a pretty important file (learned this on my 2nd call). Eventually, the other agent came to the conclusion that QB cannot run on a terminal server, so I am very excited to wait for all of our customers to blow up the help desk with this same issue. Still not resolved and currently pulling my hair out.

I’m being serious when I say my mom has been dieting all my life. It’s insane to really think about. It also in some ways makes me wonder if my mom regrets my birth. She was thin and had beautiful skin before I was born but once she got pregnant with me it all went down hill. As soon as she was able to she started trying to lose weight.
It started off simple. Healthy diets and more green veg. Then it got more extreme, weight watchers, Jenny Craig the cabbage soup diet and Slimfast. She tried hydroxycut but soon had to get off of it because she had HBP and it would worsen her condition. She would stop here and there throughout the years then randomly pick it up again only to drop it shortly after. By the time I was in HS I was used to her randomly announcing she was going to diet again. When the paleo diet kicked off she did it, when the keto diet became big she tried it. But she never kept up with any of them. I felt bad watching her panic over a pound or two or complaining about her pant size going up. I always told her to just try the most basic form of dieting; eating less and working out consistently.
But she never did that, instead she’d do the bone broth diet or the intermittent fasting diet. She still does those two diets here and there and each time I remind her; these diets only offer temporary relief. Now at this point, she’s approaching 55 I just want her to enjoy herself. I feel like now she should accept herself and just let herself enjoy the foods she wants without feeling guilty. It’s hard watching her try all these weird workouts only to never actually stay on track and to give up. So many unused exercise equipment rots away because she gives up on it within 2 months. She got herself a stationary bike, a recumbent bike, a desk bike and of course, a regular bike all sitting around collecting dust.
I applaud her effort, I really do but for fucks sake I think it’s time to throw in the towel. She swears she isn’t dieting anymore but she is. She bought hiking sticks a while back because she heard it’s a good workout to do while walking. They’re currently in the closet untouched. She bought a small trampoline to use for working out, she set it up and still hasn’t used it. Right now she’s on an aerobic walking video that she does every morning next to her untouched trampoline.
I’m glad she’s trying to be active and I’m not saying I want my mom to live her life as a couch potato. I just want her to enjoy herself while she’s able to.

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The EXTREMELY detailed, mega-anxiety edition!!! Major events like consult and surgery day are labeled like this:
——— EVENT TITLE ———
Surgeon was Dr. David Whitehead and I saw him on Long Island (New Hyde)
Summarized list of major dates:
Consult: July 19 2023 Mental health letter acquired: August 9 Dates discussed: September 12 Pre-op appointment: December 18 Surgery day: January 8 2024 Post-op: January 17
November 11th 2022: Emailed northwell health for the first time, they emailed back saying to call. I was too anxious so I avoided it for a few months.
Called northwell a few months later but got too anxious talking to the person who picked up. They were being normal and talking normally, it was just personal anxiety on my part.
October 2022 - Early March 2023: Spent time talking to trans friends and family members about their timelines and processes for top surgery.
Looked into Penn medicine for a bit but wasn’t happy with the surgeons there, specifically as a nonbinary person. The patient navigational team however is lovely.
March 2: emailed Penn health patient navigation
March 3-10: correspondence and phone calls w patient navigation (absolutely wonderful people, some of the easiest phone calls I’ve ever had) Got lots of into on surgeons, things I’d need, processes etc.
Date unknown: phone call to Penn medicine asking about surgeons and possibly setting up as a patient (v long wait time on phone) Surgeon I had heard good things about only works w CHOP program and I’m was too old for that program. Other surgeons I was v iffy on.
March 23rd: Back to square 1. Called northwell again to set up an appointment. Everyone I spoke to was really nice. Could have set up an appointment within the week but decided to wait till the end of the semester. Scheduled a trans care and primary care appointment for May
Couple of calls In between for confirmations. Trans care appointment got moved around a bit and ended up being moved to a phone call.
May 8th: Trans care call: Basic preliminary questions like: Emergency contact, what you’re looking for, are you thinking of looking into hormones, experience w dysphoria or dysmorphia, mental health, and eating/nutritional concerns, things you might want doc to know, piercings or tattoos, do you do any drugs or drink often, etc. total call time was about 20 minutes. Doctor was incredibly kind, I still experienced a good deal of anxiety but the call was super easy, welcoming, and friendly. Got sent contact referrals for the surgeons, as well as trans-friendly therapists under my insurance.
May 9th: started looking at list of therapists and making respective emails and calls. Checking per session costs and double checking insurance. Most charge 100-150 per session. Got in contact w one.
May 10th: Called w first therapist talking about what I’m looking for, where I am in this process, if parents are supportive, and talking about costs. She was very friendly and affirming, wants to have a few sessions to get to know me and my situation before writing a letter. Understandable and expected, but frustrating.
May 15th: Primary care appointment: Went to northwell health primary care, parkinglot was a little scary (just a large lot with a lot of cars) but everyone working there’s is super kind. Office is incredibly affirming, pride flags and lgbtq+ art everywhere. Gave my insurance card, filled out some paper work, got called in pretty quickly. I have a needle phobia and medical trauma so I was panicking a bit in the office, nurse was good w me about it and doctor was very kind, I just requested to not have any blood work done that day and that was totally fine, so I could schedule that at a later date and go w a friend. Recommended to get blood work done before scheduling a consult w a surgeon. Also prescribed me a single dose anxiety med for the bloodwork which I was very happy about. I found over time that the anxiety meds unfortunately do little to nothing for my panic attacks personally when it comes to needles but regardless having a doctor acknowledge and respect that fear and listen to me was incredibly helpful and reassuring.
May 30th: Got blood work done in a different lab, went w a friend. Scheduling for that is super easy, I think I did it online actually I don’t entirely recall. they do take walk ins but I made an appointment to minimize complications and make sure I could prepare properly. Front desk/lobby area was a little spooky, but I think that is mainly just bc of my social anxiety. They take a urine sample, you give them your prescription, eventually they call you over for blood work. Quick and easy, tech was v nice and having a friend with me was incredibly helpful. Probably the best I’ve ever done with a needle despite the fact that I did still panic and get very lightheaded lol.
Got blood work results back within the next couple days, all looks a-okay! Neat :)
June 15th This day was incredibly difficult. I had my first session with a therapist to establish some ground knowledge around my dysphoria and the way that I view myself. Top surgery is something that I know from research and related experience Can be difficult and expensive to get and can take time, so much of my prep work has been on the understanding of taking things a step at a time and just knowing that the current way things are doesn’t have to be forever. It allowed me to be able to live with myself while prioritizing my health better. This read to the therapist as “not having the level of dysphoria [she’s] come to expect and look for in someone who is trans” and was largely based off the fact that I don’t want to go on hrt. Past that point I started to break down because now my method of learning to live with myself felt like it was actively going to work against me and prevent me from getting top surgery. I’m not good at talking about my dysphoria, I can’t imagine it’s easy for anyone, especially to a stranger I just met. It was rough, and I felt incredibly mentally drained after ending the session.
June 19th Called it quits with the first therapist, I felt incredibly disrespected and the one session we had put me in a mental spiral for days. It can feel some times in this process like the people you have to get permission from need you to be severely depressed and unable to wait another second for this procedure just in order to take you seriously.
After I left that therapist, I immediately got back to the list to find someone new. Spoke to a new therapist via email, but my insurance is kinda weird (Blue Cross Blue Shield out of state) so its off putting to some people. This therapist recommended I go through the office she started out at (Heart and Soul Counseling)
————- Time Skip ——————
IM BACK its time for some record keeping. Got super overwhelmed and lost the energy to document my process for some time so here goes.
HEART AND SOUL COUNSELING: My experience w/ this therapy office was mostly good. The person in charge, Jesse, was absolutely lovely and responsive. Never spoke in person, but any text/email interaction was prompt, respectful, and kind. The office is stellar with email/text communication, so I only ever had to call them once when I was initially inquiring about the office. This is something I wish all therapy/counseling centers did better, eliminated a ton of my anxiety and hesitation to speak to therapists.
I got set up w someone as quickly as possible and established what my goal was (to acquire letter document for my surgery team). I attended multiple session w the therapist, she was a kind lady but the sessions were unfortunately p miserable for me. We didn’t fit well, but I was willing to stick it out rather than backtrack on my process. She also did not invalidate me or accuse me of not being trans which was a major step up from my first therapy experience. Once I acquired my letter I did stop therapy there, I kindly explained to the therapist that it wasn’t a good match, but I may honestly explore my options at the office in the future. Receptionist there was also lovely and they had a cool fish tank.
———- CONSULT STARTS HERE —————
July 19th: CONSULT!!! My mama and I went to Dr. David Whiteheads office for a consult. Parking was a nightmare so I’m super glad I didn’t have to drive for this one (ty mama). Consult went really well, and the staff were all super friendly. Dr. Whitehead is cool, very chill energy and a bit intimidating, but I’m scared of everyone so that’s nothing new. First question he asked me is what I wanted/what he could do for me which caught me more off guard than it should have? I didn’t realize going into this process how many times people ask you what you’re having done even if it’s already written down, because there’s so much variety in what you can look for in the results.
We talked about the procedure, went through a slideshow n stuff, and discussed how I wanted a flat chest w/ no nipple preservation. They made sure to specify that my mental health professional letter had to include that I did not want nipple preservation because thats technically a “non-standard” appearance. Also had the first breast exam I’ve ever had in my life. Can’t say i’m a fan (not that I need to worry about that anymore!) Took pictures n measurements n such, and also discussed recovery supplies and care w me and my mom.
August 9th: After a plethora of painfully awkward therapy sessions, a decent amount of crying, and a couple breakdowns in friends cars/backyards, I got my therapist letter and sent it to the surgeons office. It ended up needing minor revisions to which I contacted Jesse from Heart and Soul and he got me the revised letter immediately. Unfortunately the surgical coordinator was out of office for the rest of the month the next day ;w;. Is how it be.
September 12th: Got a call from Surgical coordinator mid-painting class that I stepped out to take. Started discussing surgical dates!! She was kind enough to email the dates to me which was lovely because I was absolutely shaking/mind blank haha. There was an option for January 8th which felt like an absolute miracle the way it would work with my school schedule. It would give me a solid two weeks recovery time before spring semester began. Because it would be a couple months out, I was asked to contact her in the second week of October to submit documents to insurance.
(Timeline note: earliest date offered was in early December)
October 10th: Documents sent to insurance, predetermination started
October 30th: Received mail from my insurance approving my procedure as medically necessary (YAY) But! This is also where things get,,, fun! Dr Whitehead’s surgical coordinator, Alyssa, is a blessing and was very helpful and prompt with me despite the fact that I had to email her pretty constantly during this general time which I still feel bad about.
Around this time, my mom got diagnosed with breast cancer, which I reported to the surgical coordinator because it influences my family history (grandmother also had breast cancer). It was asked that I get genetic testing done because this could impact my surgical procedure. Now I’m handling the setup on this between helping my mom in her process setting up consults and considering her options because there of course is a lot of crossover to the steps I’ve already completed and am familiar with.
November 1st: Very kind person at cancer genetics calls me, sends me a family history questionnaire to fill out before I can be scheduled to see a genetic counselor. Filled out the questionnaire the same day.
November 8th: Called cancer genetics to check about scheduling, office was not open so left a message. Got a call back later in the day. I have a virtual appointment with a Genetic counselor Tuesday the 14th. Current plan is a mailed saliva genetic test but I’m going to ask if theres anything I can do to get results/materials quicker. If I can’t get results/feedback by December 8th my surgery date may get deferred.
Trying not to stress too much because there is little to nothing I can do about this, and I just don’t want to be sad. I’ve kept telling myself throughout this process to not get excited and not let myself believe anything is solid because something could happen at any time that might mess up my schedule or plan, and If I convince myself I’m in the clear, those changes will hurt a lot more. So far I think thats been a good move, because this really sucks.
My surgery date is still officially scheduled as of now as well as my first post-op. I will also ideally have pre-surgical testing done December 18th should I be cleared by genetics in time (Fingers crossed!)
ALSO! Def lean on friends if/when you can during this process. It can absolutely be challenging, and having a support system is incredibly important and helpful. I’m super lucky to have really lovely and supportive friends that are around to listen to me and send me pictures of stupid little animals.
November 9th: My mama is scheduled for her double mastectomy on December 4th
November 10th: Did some shopping with my mama for recovery supplies for double mastectomy/top surgery. Having watched a million and a half transition/top surgery videos and tiktoks and having read all the blogs and posts and tweets makes you a great support for someone suddenly faced with an upcoming double mastectomy! We might go shopping this weekend for some button ups and zip ups for her, clothes shopping is better done when you can try stuff on
November 14th: Meeting w genetic counselor: Victoria Webb, one of the loveliest medical care workers I’ve ever met. Had a virtual appointment with her to discuss and set up genetic testing. I explained to her about my situation w the proximity of my surgery and tight deadline as well as my willingness to do a blood test instead of a saliva kit to get results quicker. She was so incredibly kind and good with me, ended up being able to do a saliva kit and get results in time she deserves every good thing in life.
December 18th: pre-surgical testing: This was at the main hospital, everyone was really nice but I had a really bad panic attack despite being on Xanax.
The process is sort of like getting a physical. Measurements like weight and blood pressure get taken, lots of preliminary health questions. The people working with me were really kind and I was very open with them about my anxiety, it was visually apparent though anyway because I started crying the second we even started talking about the blood draw.
Once the equipment was actually brought into the room I started to panic. Both of the women working with me were really kind and helpful and tried to distract me and keep me talking the entire time, but I did still have a really horrible panic attack. Every muscle in my body locked up and I lost all my color, took a bit to get back to a spot where I could move and talk properly because my speech was affected too. It was a bit scary but funny to think about in post. Thanked the medical staff for being patient w me as always, a good portion of the anxiety is also guilt about making things harder for them. Got through it tho. Def eat before presurgical if allowed, I didn’t and that probably didn’t help!!
———- SURGERY DAY ————-
January 8th:
Ok so surgery day:
This day was very scary. Got my phone call the Friday prior for my surgery time which ended up being 1pm and I was asked to arrive around 11. Got there at 10 and went in at 10:30.
Called up to check in then in waiting room till someone brought me back to change. I told her right away about my anxiety with the iv bc that’s legit all I could think about. Got changed right after. I was generally shaky and a little disoriented the entire time because I was panicking but everyone was very patient with me. Clothes and belongings go in a bag in a locker and you get two gowns one that faces back and one that faces front. I was given underwear and a pad as well because lucky me I got my period a couple days before my surgery.
The pre-op area is a lot of little cubicles with curtain divider things, blue soft chairs, and medical equipment. Everyone I met and spoke to was very kind, but any time someone even suggested starting my iv I would panic. I was informed it would have to be placed in my hand and that terrified me, I’m especially anxious and sensitive about my hands and fingers. I think doctors and nurses tend to misunderstand exactly where my fear is with needles and ivs. It isn’t the pain that scares me, but the concept of veins and and anything being in them. Even writing this right now is horrible so I’m going to stop w any further detail. I spent the entire two-ish hours of pre-op absolutely terrified about this iv.
I wasn’t really keeping track of time but dr whitehead came in to do markings for surgery. They had cool rainbow socks on,big fan. Having your chest drawn on and just like, moved around n shit is such an experience. Felt bad because I kept losing my balance but doctor Whitehead is cool and I am 98% less scared about them now.
Probably my most favorite person I met during my entire hospital experience was the anesthesiologist. I know he told me what his name was but I couldn’t focus on or retain information at the time. He told me we could essentially put me to sleep with gas before putting the iv in and for the first time in probably a solid week I felt like I could calm down a little. He took a look at my hand and arm to check my veins which always does freak me out a bit but I’m more used to that kind of thing at this point and I know nothing bad is going to happen. One of the nurses came in with the iv equipment and he let her know that were going to wait till in the or which was also incredibly helpful because I absolutely panicked when I saw that little supply kit again.
V nice lady brought me into the or, I’d never been in one before it was cool. They had a little music speaker which was really cool. Took off blue jacket gown and they helped me onto the table. They put a warm blanket over my legs and my chest to help me calm down. Before long they gave me a mask w fun happy sleepy time gas, they let me keep my arms on my chest for a while which was really nice because I was still scared. I started getting loopy pretty fast but I still heard when someone mentioned where the iv equipment was and panicked a little because of that. I remember feeling them take my hand for that but never actually felt anything happen. Just some fear but the gas was v helpful obvi. Someone said they would see me in a little bit, and then I was groggily waking up in recovery.
Recovery was a little rough bc the iv was still there (fully wrapped up so I couldn’t see it though which was rad) but I was still really anxious about it until it was taken out and when it was taken out. For anyone that struggles w this i did not feel them remove it, just the tape. Everything was mentally much easier after that. After a while, going over instructions w parents, a cracker , some ginger ale and some juice, my dad helped me Get dressed and I was helped out to the car in a wheel chair. Ride was smooth bc of remaining numbness and meds except a few Bumps in the road
TOP SURGERY GOTTEN
My post op date was scheduled for Jan 17th and that’s the day I got my drains out followed by several post op check-ins. First week of recovery was miserable but things exponentially approved each day past that, and I went back to school in person two weeks post-op with driving and item-carrying assistance from friends!
Will upload recovery notes at a later date! Feel free to message me with any questions, more than happy to answer and give info! I’m a bit over four months out from surgery now and thriving 🥳

I'm looking for friends to chat with on the daily. I work in tech, and apart from spontaneous trips to the outside world, I am behind my desk a lot so I am very available on discord. If I'm not working, gaming, watching shows or being at the gym, you might find me at a local coffee place, as I am a bit of a coffee snob. I am open minded, alcohol and drug "friendly" and won't judge you for that. If you show an interest in any of my hobbies (find out what they are) I won't shut up and talk to you about it for days. I'm looking for someone that's 25 or older and somewhat active on discord to keep me company during the day. Huge bonus if you're a gamer, have a cat, or watch a shit ton of shows. I'm sure we'd find something to play or watch. Pet pics are more than welcome.. Most of our interactions would be through text, but I'm willing to vc as well once we get to know each other.
I'd appreciate someone that is willing to pour the same amount of energy into forming one as I am. In some of my previous experiences I didn't feel that balance, mutual efforts should be made so please no dry chats.

I'm looking for friends to chat with on the daily. I work in tech, and apart from spontaneous trips to the outside world, I am behind my desk a lot so I am very available on discord. If I'm not working, gaming, watching shows or being at the gym, you might find me at a local coffee place, as I am a bit of a coffee snob. I am open minded, alcohol and drug "friendly" and won't judge you for that. If you show an interest in any of my hobbies (find out what they are) I won't shut up and talk to you about it for days. I'm looking for someone that's 25 or older and somewhat active on discord to keep me company during the day. Huge bonus if you're a gamer, have a cat, or watch a shit ton of shows. I'm sure we'd find something to play or watch. Pet pics are more than welcome.. Most of our interactions would be through text, but I'm willing to vc as well once we get to know each other.
I'd appreciate someone that is willing to pour the same amount of energy into forming one as I am. In some of my previous experiences I didn't feel that balance, mutual efforts should be made so please no dry chats.

I worked for a pretty well known cinema for 4 years when I was 15. We welcomed usually around 400 - 2,000 guests a day (even on Monday nights) and had 12 cinemas.
The benefits were good, free movie tickets, free food, though, the job itself was literal hell some nights. Don’t get me wrong, I loved the people there however it was just aspects of the job which ruined things.
People would trash cinemas (once we had 3 boys around 13 who had a cinema to themselves (cinema can fit around 80), and they literally trashed every row. Popcorn, pringles, cheese sticks? Rubbish, everywhere.) T
here was always those few customers who choose to make our job harder, and delay those waiting for the next movie.
I was written up for being 4 minutes late before I left, despite calling ahead to let them know that there was a car accident, and things went down from there.
Then there was people who always complained of the price, taking it out on staff but the paying directly after. Some of our staff were reduced to tears.
In this job, there were 2 things I hadn’t signed up for: - Gang Activity : 3 months before I left, 3 rival gangs had a fight in one of our cinemas, we closed our gates and everything, one staff member was stabbed as a result.

• Understaffing : Despite having over 300 staff for this location, our manager always understaffed to save money. This led to days being full on and stressful.
  
• 2 AM closes : I never knew, that I was forced to work until 2 AM some nights as the cinemas all closed then. Sure, penalty rates, though the lateness was bizarre.
  

It was understaffing which ultimately led to my managers demise, I chose to quit before my shift and see a movie. That left 3 people on our Payment Desk during a Friday night, with I believe 1,200 coming in that night, and NO ONE to clean cinemas. As I was waiting for my movie, my manager was inundated in complaints, and was giving refunds every minute. He begged me to clean a cinema for him for $10, and so I said sure, and sat in the cinema with his money doing nothing. As I was closing that night, I assume my manager had to stay until 2 AM closing, though he was probably there later with him being understaffed. Meanwhile me chilling at home in bed.
I, M, 19, now work at an escape room making $32 an hour with good benefits, hours and colleagues.
So, AITA for abandoning my employer?

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I just feel like I’m going crazy and I need some advice. My girlfriend and I have been together for 3 years.
I will try and give as much relevant background as possible so people can fairly weigh in.
I (23M) am a law school student, and I lost a decent amount of weight and muscle during finals season.
Today, my girlfriend (25F) showed me a topless picture of myself from when I had gained a lot of muscle from hitting the gym, and was sort of lamenting that she missed how I looked. It kind of stung, especially when she knows all I have been through with the stresses of finals and school.
As some background, I have always struggled to gain weight (started at about 145 at the beginning of our relationship. I am just over 6ft). My girlfriend continually voiced her wanting me to gain weight, and I continually failed to form a regular gym schedule for quite a while. This one is completely on me. But last year, I forced myself to eat WAY more and began exercising more regularly. By winter break, I got to 160 pounds and it was a big accomplishment for me.
Unfortunately, I basically lost 7-10 pounds during second semester law school finals (just finished thank God). For those who don’t know law school finals are no joke, and you really need to start working your ass off from about a month out at a minimum. I spent every hour I wasn’t at school or commuting at my desk studying and making outlines. Especially during the last few weeks, I began taking my ADHD medication almost every day. (This can also contribute to weight loss). She knows all of this. She also knows I’m working so hard to give us a better future.
For someone who is already skinny and has almost 0 body fat, 7-10 pounds is really noticeable - especially in my chest and arms.
When she lamented on my past figure, this honestly really stung since I’ve been really unhappy about it myself. Since I’m applying to law-related summer jobs basically every waking hour I’m not spending time doing activities with her, I still haven’t had the time to go to the gym.
When we walked the dog after dinner, she commented on my posture. It admittedly sucks I look like a less extreme version of the “golden ratio” or whatever. She has also been telling this t me for forever, but I just can’t get the good posture to stick. I think it’s fair that she’s really pissed about repeatedly telling me this for 3 years.
I jokingly asked why she’s being so mean today, and she asked for examples.
When I brought up the issue with the picture, I told her that “it made me feel not so good”. While I didn’t expect an apology, she refused to really even acknowledge why this would hurt my feelings, and instead brought up that she was mad to see me lose some progress. I told her to put herself in my shoes, and we continued to have this back and forth for about another 10 minutes or so until we got home. Finally, she said she was sorry - in what came across as a really half assed and not heartfelt apology.
When I mentioned that her apology didn’t mean much when she argued with me about it for 10 minutes, she got mad at me.
I tried to explain that all I wanted was for her to be a little more light-handed with her wanting me to gain weight, but that her “apologizing” so late and half-assed just made me hurt more. She wouldn’t even acknowledge that her apology was late.
I tried putting her in my shoes by saying what if she gained weight and I started lamenting over her past skinner version. She then got even more mad since she says I ask her to “put herself in my shoes” during every argument. I guess I do.
It took her 30 minutes of arguing for her to admit that her apology was late. She says that she was still mad about my posture and wasn’t thinking clearly or something along those lines.
To me - with both the apology and the argument about the apology - it feels like she was just refusing to admit any wrongdoing, even when I think she knew “what she did wrong” (from my perspective). I told her this, and she got even more mad at me.
Am I just being sensitive here? Was I just arguing about something dumb like she seems to think?
I just wanted to feel heard, and for her to acknowledge that she could have been nicer.
Please rip some sense into me if I’m just being dumb.

Ima speak for all real mfs that been around and get active, you can just tell how compa and lush talk and move, they been sniffing blow since 6, on top of that, all the people that believed lush or compa, you’re exactly like them, you’re bitch. You’re tough on the internet but once it starts touching ur real life your voice gets shaky, stop talking about yuriy who went to Hollywood high being under his desk, compa was literally choking on his words and lush’s homies force cut the stream on him.