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Playboi Carti
2016.07.27 09:28 DXKO Playboi Carti
A subreddit dedicated to the discussion of hip-hop/trap artist Playboi Carti.
2013.02.20 23:58 cosmosclover cracker bargel
2013.03.13 21:41 JoshTheDerp An ode to Ken M.
Welcome to KenM! This subreddit is dedicated to posts of a quirky old man, who is known as KenM. Please review the rules before posting!
2024.05.14 09:10 Big-Boysenberry-636 31[M4F] UK/Anywhere - Looking for something special
Hey all hope you're having a great day :)
So like most people i'm missing that special person in my life and it would be really nice to find someone that i can relate to, be 100% honest and open with and generally find my best friend.
Hopefully this would start out as friendship and if we click then we click, open to anyone from anywhere :)
Some stuff about me/hobbies
Video games, this is my biggest hobby by far, i play have an pretty big library of games i play so if you game, there is a high chance we would share stuff we could play, a few games i play often, League(i question it too don't worry) soulsbourne games (unga bunga builds) fallout's, i mainly play pc but have a switch and ps4 too.
TV/Film, if not doing the above, you can find me binge watching shows or films, such as B99, the office HIMYM, GoT (we can discuss how shit the last season was forever), Star Wars, Marvel stuff, SAW.
Animals, i have 2 dogs (yes i'll show you lots of pictures) and in general i love animals so much, so i'll probably spam you with pictures of random animals i think are cute or funny :)
Music, i listen to a wide variety of stuff, from rock and metal to dance/pop some electro swing, rap and other stuff, in general if i like a song i'll listen to it on repeat till i hate it but still listen to it anyway.
I try and be witty and funny most the time, I have a stupid sense of humour but will try and make you laugh most of the time, I can be shy to start with but i open up pretty quickly when i get comfortable with you :)
Don't be shy and hit me up if you think we would get on :)
submitted by Big-Boysenberry-636 to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]
So like most people i'm missing that special person in my life and it would be really nice to find someone that i can relate to, be 100% honest and open with and generally find my best friend.
Hopefully this would start out as friendship and if we click then we click, open to anyone from anywhere :)
Some stuff about me/hobbies
Video games, this is my biggest hobby by far, i play have an pretty big library of games i play so if you game, there is a high chance we would share stuff we could play, a few games i play often, League(i question it too don't worry) soulsbourne games (unga bunga builds) fallout's, i mainly play pc but have a switch and ps4 too.
TV/Film, if not doing the above, you can find me binge watching shows or films, such as B99, the office HIMYM, GoT (we can discuss how shit the last season was forever), Star Wars, Marvel stuff, SAW.
Animals, i have 2 dogs (yes i'll show you lots of pictures) and in general i love animals so much, so i'll probably spam you with pictures of random animals i think are cute or funny :)
Music, i listen to a wide variety of stuff, from rock and metal to dance/pop some electro swing, rap and other stuff, in general if i like a song i'll listen to it on repeat till i hate it but still listen to it anyway.
I try and be witty and funny most the time, I have a stupid sense of humour but will try and make you laugh most of the time, I can be shy to start with but i open up pretty quickly when i get comfortable with you :)
Don't be shy and hit me up if you think we would get on :)
2024.05.14 09:01 DoomsdayMaze TIFU by faking my death
So when I get high, I have this weird tendency to photoshop myself into shit. And one time I was doing this and I photoshopped myself in the sky with R.I.P and posted this on Facebook, thinking people will know I'm alive.
But this one dude I used to go to bars with years ago sees this and snapchats my friend and asks if I'm actually dead. She sends this to me and I tell you to go along with it and say I overdosed.
I was with a group of my friends so to convince this dude, they all start posting r.i.p posts for me and then my friends who knew me but weren't there play along too and start also posting r.i.p posts.
But then people who don't know me well enough see my friends posts and start thinking I'm dead and posting actual R.I.P posts.
So now I have a bunch of people who vaguely know me thinking I'm actually six feet fucking under and I don't know what to do.
TL;DR I got high and thought it'd be funny to convince somebody I'm dead.
submitted by DoomsdayMaze to tifu [link] [comments]
But this one dude I used to go to bars with years ago sees this and snapchats my friend and asks if I'm actually dead. She sends this to me and I tell you to go along with it and say I overdosed.
I was with a group of my friends so to convince this dude, they all start posting r.i.p posts for me and then my friends who knew me but weren't there play along too and start also posting r.i.p posts.
But then people who don't know me well enough see my friends posts and start thinking I'm dead and posting actual R.I.P posts.
So now I have a bunch of people who vaguely know me thinking I'm actually six feet fucking under and I don't know what to do.
TL;DR I got high and thought it'd be funny to convince somebody I'm dead.
2024.05.14 09:01 Viktri1 Exit node: potential weirdness with location?
Question/issue: my home network in North America is showing up as being located in Asia to some apps like banking, facebook, etc. despite the fact that tailscale is not being used on the devices of my home network.
Set up:
Location A: Asia Location B: North America
I have Tailscale set up to allow exit nodes in Asia and North America. In Asia, tailscale is set up with my pfsense router. In North America, tailscale is set up with my synology NAS.
I have exit nodes set up in North America and Asia. I sometimes use North America IP to tunnel traffic.
Today my parents in North America told me that they're getting notified by some apps that they're located in Asia. When they use whatismyipaddress it shows North America. The devices getting these notifications don't have tailscale installed.
I'm wondering whether this is related to cookies - maybe because I used my computer in Asia to use my North America exit node that some cookies are getting picked up and my IP in North America is getting flagged as actually from Thailand?
Anyone know what could be the issue here? It's very confusing.
submitted by Viktri1 to Tailscale [link] [comments]
Set up:
Location A: Asia Location B: North America
I have Tailscale set up to allow exit nodes in Asia and North America. In Asia, tailscale is set up with my pfsense router. In North America, tailscale is set up with my synology NAS.
I have exit nodes set up in North America and Asia. I sometimes use North America IP to tunnel traffic.
Today my parents in North America told me that they're getting notified by some apps that they're located in Asia. When they use whatismyipaddress it shows North America. The devices getting these notifications don't have tailscale installed.
I'm wondering whether this is related to cookies - maybe because I used my computer in Asia to use my North America exit node that some cookies are getting picked up and my IP in North America is getting flagged as actually from Thailand?
Anyone know what could be the issue here? It's very confusing.
2024.05.14 08:58 StandardDate555 Another am I post
Going through the threads I see this question come up a lot, so I'm hesitant to ask but I feel like my situation is a bit different.
Tldr What can I do to figure out if I'm actually trans?
33 year old amab. And I have a lot of the very masculine markers (I'm 6 foot 8, grow a full beard in 2 days, hair freaking everywhere, that sort of thing). Thing is I've never felt pride in them. Even when I work hard to make myself look good (and I know I can, I used to be a shirtless bartender) I've never really felt joy in it for itself (the attention for sure but still)
I realized about 7 years ago I'm bi, and honestly really only accepted it a year or so ago (was in a committed het relationship so...) and about 6 months ago I realized I might be genderfluid at least. So I'm not exactly fast at making these decisions or processing these thoughts.
But lately I've realized that every character I create to project myself onto has been femme. All of my mmos, fallout, etc. I got a pair of pants that actually fit me from value village the other day. Most comfortable pair of pants I own. They are women's pants. Honestly for most of my life I've lamented at how boring men's fashion is in comparison to women's. Regularly online people think I'm a woman and I stopped correcting them because what's the point (even had a few refuse to believe me until we got into voice). Hell my raid group is made up mostly of gay women, and they made the joke that the only reason I'm allowed in is because I'm actually a lesbian.
Then I found put the insurance I get through my job covers a lot of gender affirming care. Like at the least top and bottom surgery. Now I'm going to look into what that means tomorrow, because even if I don't use it I have more than a handful of trans friends who would like to know options I think, and I regularly have students come out to me and share their troubles.
But, I can't deny the weird emotion I am feeling finding out it could be possible. And I'm trying to process it in a constructive way.
Thing is, I know I'm depressed as hell. I know that I want something to point to and say "If this was fixed I could be happy" and I really want that to be true.
But also, as mentioned above, I've got so much, like two surgeries, tracheal shave, voice altering, face feminization, that's so much. It would take years, I'm already 34, and honestly my insurance isn't so stable that I can count on it. I haven't talked to anyone about this yet in person, because my closest friends have been (pretty obnoxiously actually) making hints that I am, but both of them are, and they have a tendency to project. I don't even know what I would say to my doctor or therapist at this point in the process, and honestly the only reason I'm here is because I'm teaching a bunch of 14 year olds math in about 7 hours and I can't get to sleep since I'm thinking about this.
So at this point asking for advice. In summary, what exercises or activities can I do to explore this and see if it's actually what it is, because if it is, I have so much work to do it's not even funny.
Obligatory on mobile disclaimer.
submitted by StandardDate555 to asktransgender [link] [comments]
Tldr What can I do to figure out if I'm actually trans?
33 year old amab. And I have a lot of the very masculine markers (I'm 6 foot 8, grow a full beard in 2 days, hair freaking everywhere, that sort of thing). Thing is I've never felt pride in them. Even when I work hard to make myself look good (and I know I can, I used to be a shirtless bartender) I've never really felt joy in it for itself (the attention for sure but still)
I realized about 7 years ago I'm bi, and honestly really only accepted it a year or so ago (was in a committed het relationship so...) and about 6 months ago I realized I might be genderfluid at least. So I'm not exactly fast at making these decisions or processing these thoughts.
But lately I've realized that every character I create to project myself onto has been femme. All of my mmos, fallout, etc. I got a pair of pants that actually fit me from value village the other day. Most comfortable pair of pants I own. They are women's pants. Honestly for most of my life I've lamented at how boring men's fashion is in comparison to women's. Regularly online people think I'm a woman and I stopped correcting them because what's the point (even had a few refuse to believe me until we got into voice). Hell my raid group is made up mostly of gay women, and they made the joke that the only reason I'm allowed in is because I'm actually a lesbian.
Then I found put the insurance I get through my job covers a lot of gender affirming care. Like at the least top and bottom surgery. Now I'm going to look into what that means tomorrow, because even if I don't use it I have more than a handful of trans friends who would like to know options I think, and I regularly have students come out to me and share their troubles.
But, I can't deny the weird emotion I am feeling finding out it could be possible. And I'm trying to process it in a constructive way.
Thing is, I know I'm depressed as hell. I know that I want something to point to and say "If this was fixed I could be happy" and I really want that to be true.
But also, as mentioned above, I've got so much, like two surgeries, tracheal shave, voice altering, face feminization, that's so much. It would take years, I'm already 34, and honestly my insurance isn't so stable that I can count on it. I haven't talked to anyone about this yet in person, because my closest friends have been (pretty obnoxiously actually) making hints that I am, but both of them are, and they have a tendency to project. I don't even know what I would say to my doctor or therapist at this point in the process, and honestly the only reason I'm here is because I'm teaching a bunch of 14 year olds math in about 7 hours and I can't get to sleep since I'm thinking about this.
So at this point asking for advice. In summary, what exercises or activities can I do to explore this and see if it's actually what it is, because if it is, I have so much work to do it's not even funny.
Obligatory on mobile disclaimer.
2024.05.14 08:56 Kingnimrod212 Well…..they finally explained why Kate can’t go through the gates…..
https://aiptcomics.com/2024/05/13/x-men-monday-251-sinister-secrets-part-1/
Putting the source at the top for everyone
For those who don’t want to read, the answer was that there was no plan and it wasn’t supposed to be a mystery, it’s just a random quirk of her powers.
Now we know this is a terrible answer and the real answer is back in 2019 when this story started Dugan was in a room with the other writers and when he was told about the gates he said “wouldn’t it be funny if Kate tried to use a gate but instead broke her nose?” And now 5 years later they admit there was nothing deeper than an issue 1 shock gag.
The problem is they just kept talking about it!! The final issue of marauders set up a cliffhanger around Reed to find out about it! To find an answer to a question the writer never planed to answer.
This was a core mystery of Kate’s entire arc. A character that has been the focus of dozens and dozens of comics in this era!
Now I always knew there was never an answer to this question. But it feels very good to get confirmation.
submitted by Kingnimrod212 to xmen [link] [comments]
Putting the source at the top for everyone
For those who don’t want to read, the answer was that there was no plan and it wasn’t supposed to be a mystery, it’s just a random quirk of her powers.
Now we know this is a terrible answer and the real answer is back in 2019 when this story started Dugan was in a room with the other writers and when he was told about the gates he said “wouldn’t it be funny if Kate tried to use a gate but instead broke her nose?” And now 5 years later they admit there was nothing deeper than an issue 1 shock gag.
The problem is they just kept talking about it!! The final issue of marauders set up a cliffhanger around Reed to find out about it! To find an answer to a question the writer never planed to answer.
This was a core mystery of Kate’s entire arc. A character that has been the focus of dozens and dozens of comics in this era!
Now I always knew there was never an answer to this question. But it feels very good to get confirmation.
2024.05.14 08:53 shaneka69 CANCER ZODIAC - UNEXPECTED INCOME! TAROT READING MAY 2024
CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024
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2024.05.14 08:46 edenskye12 Hypothetically responding to a defamation law suit
QLD AUSTRALIA
HI all.
Hypothetically..of course. Say I run a Facebook page in which members in a city can post a man they have met/been talking to to find out from other women in the area if he is safe to meet up with etc. Some women post men and leave a comment allegations abuse/Dv and other experinces with the male.
If one of these males found out about the post, and decided to sue myself as an administrator as well as the person posting for defamation...what might my options be as an administrator?
I am well aware that if someone decided to sue, that they would have a right to also persue the administrators of the page. I am also aware these sorts of cases are not likely to be won as the criteria for proving defamation is very high as well as the costs involved.
However, in terms of legal representation. How might that work for myself? I don't have the money to pay for a lawyer, I already live paycheck to paycheck.
How would I source a lawyer to fight the case without money? I know this is probably a very silly question I just have no idea how this all works.
Some friends have said I would be able to go to a lawyer for a no with no fee and counter sue for mental distress etc.
However I just get the feeling that there is no way for me to have this suit filed without me having to spend a cent on my defense.
FYI, this hasn't happened. I am just trying to decide if continuing to run this page is worth it considering the above.Q
submitted by edenskye12 to AusLegal [link] [comments]
HI all.
Hypothetically..of course. Say I run a Facebook page in which members in a city can post a man they have met/been talking to to find out from other women in the area if he is safe to meet up with etc. Some women post men and leave a comment allegations abuse/Dv and other experinces with the male.
If one of these males found out about the post, and decided to sue myself as an administrator as well as the person posting for defamation...what might my options be as an administrator?
I am well aware that if someone decided to sue, that they would have a right to also persue the administrators of the page. I am also aware these sorts of cases are not likely to be won as the criteria for proving defamation is very high as well as the costs involved.
However, in terms of legal representation. How might that work for myself? I don't have the money to pay for a lawyer, I already live paycheck to paycheck.
How would I source a lawyer to fight the case without money? I know this is probably a very silly question I just have no idea how this all works.
Some friends have said I would be able to go to a lawyer for a no with no fee and counter sue for mental distress etc.
However I just get the feeling that there is no way for me to have this suit filed without me having to spend a cent on my defense.
FYI, this hasn't happened. I am just trying to decide if continuing to run this page is worth it considering the above.Q
2024.05.14 08:41 Diligent-Ad-9479 Girlfriend claiming she would not date someone who eats Rollie Pollies.
Me and my girlfriend were having a discussion about the fact she found it funny that I use to eat Rollie Pollies as a child and all of a sudden I made a joke saying, "would you love me if I still ate Rollie Pollies?" My girlfriend said that she would not and that it would be weird and disgusting. I assumed she was joking, so I asked her to actually give a serious response. She still said that she would not date someone who eats Rollie Pollies.
I think it is weird that eating Rollie Pollies would be her deciding factor in dating a guy. A guy can have many other attractive qualities and be perfectly amazing, even if the woman dislikes their "eating Rollie Pollies" quality. I am starting to question her loyalty and love to me if eating Rollie Pollies is all it takes for her to lose interest in me.
What should I do? Do I bring her into a conversation with more serious overtones to make sure she was being serious? Is this a complete red flag on her part?
submitted by Diligent-Ad-9479 to dating_advice [link] [comments]
I think it is weird that eating Rollie Pollies would be her deciding factor in dating a guy. A guy can have many other attractive qualities and be perfectly amazing, even if the woman dislikes their "eating Rollie Pollies" quality. I am starting to question her loyalty and love to me if eating Rollie Pollies is all it takes for her to lose interest in me.
What should I do? Do I bring her into a conversation with more serious overtones to make sure she was being serious? Is this a complete red flag on her part?
2024.05.14 08:37 randomlymadename My product got validated. Now what?
Hi, I'm the founder of an EdTech platform. It started off as a question generator, but now I'm planning to upgrade it into a full-on AI-powered suite (AI Tutoring, progress tracking, etc). I launched an MVP on Social Media (Facebook and Threads, organically) and it blew up: 100 new registrations and active users in the first 24 hours. Immediately after that, there have been 4 more people who decided to buy the cheapest option. Some even messaged me as for how the app has been something they'd been looking for. A week later, there's even one person who decided to sign up for the premium package which is the AI-powered suite (since we haven't finished developing the package, I redirected the users to an email waitlist for notification once they pressed purchase.) I believed our product was on its right track to achieve PMF.
However, after 2 weeks, when the hype evens out, I stoped getting significant signals: 2 weeks later and my app got 70-ish more sign ups, DAU drops down to about 5 to 10. I think it is because some users just want to try out new questions on our app but it is not enticing enough for users to have it in the long run. I have recruited two more developers to help out on adding more features, and we agreed to share the profit of the first two months after the next big campaign (mid June).
My question is:
submitted by randomlymadename to startups [link] [comments]
However, after 2 weeks, when the hype evens out, I stoped getting significant signals: 2 weeks later and my app got 70-ish more sign ups, DAU drops down to about 5 to 10. I think it is because some users just want to try out new questions on our app but it is not enticing enough for users to have it in the long run. I have recruited two more developers to help out on adding more features, and we agreed to share the profit of the first two months after the next big campaign (mid June).
My question is:
- Should I be woried of the stats after the hype?
- What should I do to promote / increase the conversion of our EdTech platform?
- What are the options for me to scale the project, given its current state and that I haven't establish any kind of company yet?
2024.05.14 08:37 sleepyazriel help I think my mum is in denial that I’m autistic
IDK WHAT TO SAY HONESTLY every time i mention im autistic or its brought up in conversation she keeps saying “you’re not, the doctor just said you show symptoms” like lady that same doctor sent me home a letter that literally reads “a diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder has been confirmed”
Also she keeps saying “the doctor says you were just borderline autistic” (im quite sure she did not because genuinely what??)
she also doesn’t want to tell my family because of my close cousins would look at me differently and one of my aunts works with “severely” autistic children and would also look down on me (I’d like to hope she wouldn’t if she works with autistic kids??) She also keeps trying to tell me about how this was my decision when literally all I wanted to do when I got my diagnosis was talk mad shit about my past teachers that completely ignored so many of my autistic traits and the mad waiting list times
And if she ever admits that yes I am autistic she pulls the “but it’s only level one though so it’s very very little autism and doesn’t affect you” like im pretty sure a disability is going to alter my life in some shape or form and those levels are supposed to describe different support needs of autism and not one general diagnosis (correct me if I’m wrong of course)
Also throughout my 2 years of waiting for an assessment EVERY time it was mentioned I got hit with the “are you sure you want to ruin your life like that with a diagnosis?” Like the only people that are gonna know are me and my gp, my employers are not gonna go digging through my assessment looking for reasons not to hire me
she’s also completely unwilling to learn anything about autism which Is… really unhelpful but not surprising
I feel like the answer is kinda obvious at this point but what the actual fuck do I do is the real question now 😭 like I understand the whole people looking at me differently thing but I also could care less so maybe I should make a big fat Facebook post saying “fun fact - I’m autistic, and i was pretty good at hiding it all from you until I got bored!” And then just post a pic of the little “autism diagnosis has been confirmed” image
IDK it’s kind of funny but also really frustrating please help me Reddit you’ve never let me down before 🙏
submitted by sleepyazriel to AutismInWomen [link] [comments]
Also she keeps saying “the doctor says you were just borderline autistic” (im quite sure she did not because genuinely what??)
she also doesn’t want to tell my family because of my close cousins would look at me differently and one of my aunts works with “severely” autistic children and would also look down on me (I’d like to hope she wouldn’t if she works with autistic kids??) She also keeps trying to tell me about how this was my decision when literally all I wanted to do when I got my diagnosis was talk mad shit about my past teachers that completely ignored so many of my autistic traits and the mad waiting list times
And if she ever admits that yes I am autistic she pulls the “but it’s only level one though so it’s very very little autism and doesn’t affect you” like im pretty sure a disability is going to alter my life in some shape or form and those levels are supposed to describe different support needs of autism and not one general diagnosis (correct me if I’m wrong of course)
Also throughout my 2 years of waiting for an assessment EVERY time it was mentioned I got hit with the “are you sure you want to ruin your life like that with a diagnosis?” Like the only people that are gonna know are me and my gp, my employers are not gonna go digging through my assessment looking for reasons not to hire me
she’s also completely unwilling to learn anything about autism which Is… really unhelpful but not surprising
I feel like the answer is kinda obvious at this point but what the actual fuck do I do is the real question now 😭 like I understand the whole people looking at me differently thing but I also could care less so maybe I should make a big fat Facebook post saying “fun fact - I’m autistic, and i was pretty good at hiding it all from you until I got bored!” And then just post a pic of the little “autism diagnosis has been confirmed” image
IDK it’s kind of funny but also really frustrating please help me Reddit you’ve never let me down before 🙏
2024.05.14 08:36 BillFireCrotchWalton OP gets really mad about a Muslim character in a TV show being gay "for absolutely no reason."
The show in question is Ramy, a comedy/drama on Hulu. For some context, the show is mostly about a Muslim family, and the character in question is Uncle Naseem, an outwardly hyper-masculine, racist, misogynist man who is clearly overcompensating for something.
submitted by BillFireCrotchWalton to SubredditDrama [link] [comments]
Full Comments
Original post for posterity:Like what was the point?? He was funny as hell, and I wish we could get deeper into his character, but why make him gay??? I wonder if the season where he made the uncle gay was the season the show got a Golden Globe..
Update: it’s been so fun going back and forth with you queens, please keep going, I love how butt hurt you guys are 😭 but then again I’m sure everything’s numb down there by now 😂
Update #2: I see I hurt some feelings here, let me just say, I hope you have nightmares about what I said, I hope the PreP in your stomach makes you throw up tonight, I hope you cry yourselves to sleep. Thank you for being so entertaining during my workday. Byeee queers 🥹
Why does it bother you if he is gay? And what do you mean by “absolutely no reason”? The fact that he was gay is exactly what made us get a deeper perspective on the character, which is what you say you wanted. He otherwise was just portrayed as a backward, racist, misogynist. So it was important to show another side to him, not just that he’s the “old crazy uncle.” It shows why he is the way he is, the frustration he has felt his entire life, of being gay and having to hide it, and probably being hyper masculine to compensate . Also, I could be wrong, so feel free to clarify, but if you think Uncle Naseem was “funny as hell” because you actually agree with the comments he was making, I have news for you. The show creators definitely do not want us to agree with Uncle Naseem’s viewpoints. We are supposed to be laughing AT him for the things he is saying, not with him. If you find yourself agreeing with Uncle Naseem’s viewpoints and it bothers you that he’s gay, this show might not be for you .[...]
Because its forced nowadays. If it wasn’t mandated by Hollwood, id have more respect for the writers.
Nah, it’s not forced. It made perfect sense. It’s like when you hear about anti-gay pastors and politicians getting caught on Grindr or with prostitutes. There’s no gay mafia telling Ramy what to do, but that’d be funny though lol
It really is forced, but you can pretend to ignore it.
How is it forced? Everyone disagrees with you. To us, it made perfect sense. I think you don’t like it because you’re a conservative who doesn’t like gay acts depicted
Lmfaoo so since everyone disagrees I should just agree with you all? Those echo chambers really smoothed out your brain.
Then articulate a non-smooth brained reason why you think you can’t have gay characters on TV or why this show in particular shouldn’t have one of the cast members be gay Nah there was no point. But thanks for the essay. why did you even ask the question if you didn’t want a real answer? Lmfaoooooo just cause you agree doesn’t make it a “real answer”. well the only answers you agree with are ones that reinforce the opinion you already hold. if you just wanted people to agree with you then why did you ask a question in the first place? That’s not what I said at all but go off sis
.Actually gays are dying out. Everyone is trams these days.. lesbians are unicorns now
I couldn’t disagree more with you. It makes him a more interesting character and puts a new spin on all his past statements and interactions. It makes Naseem more sympathetic because his homophobia is overcompensation and denial. Like they didn’t have to make him a diamond dealer either, but it also makes his antisemitism more interesting being that he has to work with Jews all the time..
Yeah, but he didn’t need to be gay
He didn’t need to be, it just was better for his character. Often times the most homophobic guy is gay. Why does it offend you so much? Do you think being gay is bad?
LMFAOOO such a high school response “oh he doesn’t like gays so he must be gay”. That talking point tracks with your other smooth brained buddies in here
Can you answer the question? Is being gay bad because it’s haram?
People just be gay..
Duh
Are you 13?
Ouch that one really hurt 😞
lol ok kid
thanks man🙂↕️
Dude….this is so mistaken. This isn’t just a DEI move or some shit. You have this really racist and emotionally wrecked uncle in denial and unable to accept his “flaws”. He knows he is for example attracted to men but he cannot accept that that is okay. He finds himself in the sauna getting sucked off because he couldn’t do it anywhere else. And the moment he thinks his niece finds out he goes crazy about it. Curb your homophobia/queerphobia. A show isn’t “infected” by the LGBTQ movement or part of the gay agenda just because it features gay characters. I’m sorry you’re too afraid to live in a world where media isn’t strictly heteronormative.[...]
Oh save the “phobia” garbage lol, they didn’t need to make him gay period
So why did they have to make him straight?
They don’t, but making him gay shouldn’t be his whole storyline, they barely dove into his character and they just make him gay for what?? It just feels lazy.
We’re explaining to you why the reveal that he is secretly gay is essential to his character development yet you completely ignore it and assert that “they didn’t need to make him gay”. It only appears lazy because you do not understand the logic behind it. They constantly show he’s a lonely bitter old man but we just assume it’s cuz he can’t court any women cuz he’s racist. It’s a massive reveal to us that the real reason he can’t court women is because he’s not attracted to them, and he comes from a place where homosexuality is essentially a weakness and so he cannot accept that he’s weak. We see that he was dating a guy for some time but ends up punching him in the face, because for Uncle Naseem the thing he loves is also the thing he hates most about himself. He loves his family but he also hates them. He loves Ramy but he also hates him. He loves men but he also hates being attracted to them. This is what causes the dissonance in his life, because he can’t accept his flaws. The fact that such a hard ass bought a cake for his boyfriend shows how inside he’s still soft and vulnerable like everybody else. You’re gonna keep asking the question. WHY DID THEY HAVE TO MAKE HIM GAY? The truth is that Ramy Youssef didn’t have to tell us Uncle Naseem is gay, but if we didn’t know then we would know even less about Uncle Naseem.
Yeah you’re on crack or poppers if you think I’m reading all this LMFAOOO! I’ll respond with just a simple, No you’re wrong. Thank you😇
.I would disagree. Him being secretly gay explains a lot about Naseem’s character flaws, especially concerning his overtly homophobic behavior. He’s very clearly compensating in multiple areas. He’s trying to put on this persona that doesn’t match who he actually is. I think him being gay is actually pretty crucial to the character and story line. I like that you don’t have any issues with the other characters? Others are not perfect either, yet you only seem to care about this.
Nah
You don’t even have any counter arguments, what’s the point of your post other than showing how incoherent you can be.
Awhhh I’m sorry I’m not engaging with you like you desperately want 🥺. Tell me how your day was buddy
You’re the one who posted this and can’t even hold your own lmao, you must not be that bright
You feel better? I’ve responded 2 times now okay🥺 hope you can sleep now
The butt hurt guy (ironically) who creates a post like this not having any self awareness to realize they are more like Naseem than their brain cells can handle, I almost feel bad
Ouch!!! You hit me with such an original response!!! It’s not like this take wasn’t said a million times 😭. And awhhh you feel bad for me??? Thanks man. I’m arguing with queers from around the globe, it does get tiring. Thanks bestie 🫶🏽
My bad, I had to repeat it because I thought you had some reading comprehension issues. You mentioned on another comment that you didn’t read it because 2 paragraphs was too long for your dumbass.
Nah it’s just, you queers all say the same things in your responses. Why waste my time ya know?
I’m sure Allah is very happy with you right now
Sounds like a bit of casual homophobia, eh?.
My homophobia is anything but casual
Then no answer will make sense to you. People be gay, and so is his uncle. Get over it cause everybody else loved the twist.
Lmfaoooo exactly it’s called an OPINION, you don’t have to agree bud. Btw I bet when you typed up That last sentence you crossed your arms like you did something LMAOOOOOOOOO
Bro did you see your post? You asked the question and here's the answer, you're a homophobe. Funny part is that YOU answered it hahaha
LMFAOOO you did it again!! Pressed 😭
The thought of you seething about gay folk enough to come complain here is hilarious to me lol🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈
Oh no not the rainbows!!!! Please!!! I just ate! Your “pride” gives me bubble guts!
care to explain why you have such a problem with the uncle being gay?.
Because
because what?
Because yuck
yeah I saw that you admitted to being a homophobe already. you’re a trash person with trash beliefs and a shit moral system. not much we can do about that.
LMFAOOO pat yourself on the back please, or get whoever back doors you to do it.
I think you just don’t like that he’s gay. Get over it.
Omg I really needed to hear that, thx sis! 😂
Cool, did you get over it? And not your sis, thx! 😁
Just trying to relate to you queers, I assume your a they/that. How do you guys say sis? ?”This”?
2024.05.14 08:33 McComfortable I'm in serious need of help and it feels like it's too late for me
I don't really no where to start. I feel I've lost myself, consumed with anxiety and guilt and fear and regret and I fear, this new fear, that it's going to be the end of me if I don't start to get it out in some way, shape or form.
I guess I'll begin at the beginning...
I had a difficult childhood with fairly neglectful parents. A mother who openly expressed she never felt she really stepped into her mom shoes until she gave birth to my younger sister, who is three years younger than me. She is my only sibling. My mother told me when I was a kid that she "had to love me", but when my sister came around "she was finally a mother and over the moon", or simply "I always always wanted a girl". I'm not sure if this could be attributed to Post-partum depression, not that she ever researched that or was daignosed with it. That's probably just me trying to pardon my mother or something to the effect. She was 17 when she had me and I'm sure times were different then, my parents both were raised religious, father christian, mother mormon. Maybe their guilt. I ask myself why they brought me into this world if I wasn't wanted to begin with. Or, give me up for adoption to a set of guardians that would have loved me better. I know I was an accident and that's not what gets me down, I get that life be lifing and what happened happened. My difficulties stem from the feeling that my presence never gave my mother any sense of purpose, responsibility or love, or concern. She was emotionally unavailable to me virtually my entire life and I feel like that caused many issues later in my life and how I perceive myself and what I deserve. Coupled with the fact that my neglect met such extremes that I am frankly shocked that I was never picked up by child care services, maybe things were different in the 90's. I'm not sure, I was just a child then.
Much of my upbringing I didn't receive a lot of the things most people would consider essential. As a baby my crib was the sock drawer, then I grew large enough to have a closet, then slept on the floor of a walk-in closet, then I had a single bed from what I recall for maybe a year or maybe two years and I remember feeling metal springs poke me in the my ribs and I recall it being uncomfortable enough for me to move back to sleeping on the floor next to the ratty old used mattress my father found from who knows where. I remember feeling like I had to keep that secret, that the mattress they gave me was uncomfortable enough for me to sneak sleeping on the floor next to it. I think I was really afraid as coming across as ungrateful. My father came from a third world country, so the "gratefullness issue" was address frequently by my mom because "I don't have it even half as bad as what my father had to endure. And she was probably right. But it just silenced me ultimately, didn't put things into a mature context for me. I just learned that I can't complain about anything ever. Anyway, that trend didn't really change when I grew older. grade 9-10 I was sleeping on the living room couch so my sister could have privacy and a bedroom to exist in for herself - which I realize is important for an individual so I encouraged her to have the bedroom. Although I figured my parents expected me to do this for my sister regardless. I was okay with making sacrfices for those I love, it was instilled in me from a very very young age.
I do feel like my father took advantage of me in the form of labour as well, having to do custodial work with my father from 10pm to 3am, at two highschools I believe he was contracted, at that young age I honestly enjoyed just spending time with my father I think, working alongside him. When I was in grade 2 and 3 I had garbage bag duty for all the students bathrooms, and I remember loving snapping the bags open by rushing air into the bag and making it blow up like a baloon. I remember the scary unlit shadowy hallways that I couldn't perceive the ends of. No bodies to see, it felt eerie but exciting in a way - like it was a whole different world.
School was a different experience for me. It was very stressful, my parents had to move a few times a year because they would dodge rent or just generally be selfish with their dual income. They loved to party hard on the weekends. I remember wondering why my father did this to himself all the time. Hoping that we could spend quality time on a saturday, but he wouldnt get out of bed until just before dinner. I didn't really understand hangovers or alcoholism and how it meant our plans would get cancelled. I think I remember trying to wrap my head around willful self-poisoning for entertainment and how could that be more enjoyable then spending time with your son? I couldn't tell my mother why I was so sad about it. Why I didn't want to move again and again and again. Why I found it so difficult to make new friends everytime I had to switch schools. Why I couldn't just do one single full school year with one class of students. It was so hard and at the time, I didn't know anything different. It was so hard to make friends and I think it created this approach to making a "new family" of friends when I became a teenager and young adult.
I remember always wanting to be a "good kid". The "best kid" for my parents. I feel like my parents attached this moniker to me that made things harder for me to mature into a rounded adult later in life. My parents always flaunted me as this point of accomplishment, the accomplishment that I was "so extremely well behaved". I would strive to be super polite, and a good host, try to help out when my parents had their friends over, literally fill their cups when the opportunity presented themselves. I think I did this because I must have made the conclusion that if I was quiet, super polite, helpful and useful then I had value. That I could be loved. That I could earn this love from my parents through acts of service.
I remember feeling like my sister and I had extremely different experiences growing up. When my parents were at work I took care of her, cleaned and cooked. one time my sister told my mom to eff off when she was 5 and I was 8. My mind was blown. I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that she had the bravery and courage to defy my mother. Looking back, my sister was just mirroring the language she learned from my parents from whenever they fought. I remembering seriously worrying and getting scared that my father was going to belt her, or use the coat hanger, which was his preference with me. I feel like my mom was always checked out and I'm hurt that she allowed my father to take his rage out on me. That my mom could care less about me being beat, but never my sibling. It was very confusing and difficult for me to process. Not that I really processed it much as a kid. I honestly just wanted to be loved and be the best child possible. Honestly though, 'm seriously so glad that my sister was spared all of that complete non-sense. I don't wish that on anyone in the world. There were some punishments where he would walk in and tell me to pull my pants down without explanation. I have memories of tearing up and saying I didn't know why this was happening, asking what I did wrong and he would just remind me that if I resisted then I would get it worse and to hurry up and get ready. My father has since apologized. I think it is how he was raised. I didn't know what to say in response, but I told him I loved him and it's in the past. But I don't know if I was being honest when I said that. My mother would still gaslight me to this day if any of this became topic of discussion, not that I'm guessing. A year ago she told me that much of my pained memories were false and this never happened. My father on the other hand typically stays pensive and unchallenging.
It seems so damned crazy writing all of this out, it feels like a heartbreaking novel and not my life at all. But it was and is my life. I have difficulties opening up and expressing my feelings and advocating for myself when the moments are true and appropriate to do so. I know it's the healthier way to communicate, but I was literally taught to stay quiet and be useful. Fast forward 20-25 years and I'm going to be 35 and I feel like just ending it all. Every year my birthday passes and I'll get a text from my family happy birthday. But they know I'm in a difficult place, they know I miss them, they know I love them and forgive them, I try the high road whenever I can but I just don't see the point anymore. they won't celebrate my life and existence, but they'll throw family gatherings for each other, birthdays, christmas, fathers day and mothers day.
On that note, another mother's day has recently passed and my mother never invited me over, I texted my father three weeks in advance in hopes of securing a time to come over and celebrate my mothers life with my family as a family. I felt particularly stung this mother's day when they celebrated and didn't text or call to invite me over. I live in the same small town so it's easy to hop over. I literally live three blocks away.
Anyway, my mother was diagnosed with cancer over christmas this year and I have been worrying for my mother ever since and thinking about my life with her and the mortal coil and the finite mount of time I may have with her. I feel like there is a large empty part in my heart that wishes my mother and I could go grab a coffee together. She can show me her ipad app art that she has been really excited about for a couple years now. She loves showing off her digital art and I love seeing her joy and how proud she is about her art. I just don't know why she couldn't feel the same for me, her only son. Maybe I'm just a her dissapointment.
I dropped out of highschool and left the family home when I was 16. I just couldn't work for my dad during the night AND go to highschool AND socialize. Something had to give. Unfortunately it was highschool and my parents didn't really care about that at all. They were just... fine with it. they supported my sister through college and she was fortunately able to graduate with a veterinary degree of sorts. she still lives with them now as she pays off her student debt, but I left and travelled and worked on music for over a decade so I admit that I was entirely out of the family picture for some time. But as I get older, not wanting to repeat the mistakes of my parents I fear that that is precisely what's been creeping up in my life.
five years ago I met the absolute most wonderful human being and I am so lucky to have my partner in my life. She and I are engaged now and set to be married. I hoped that the news would overwhelm my parents with excitement and joy. Maybe a facebook post about their son, share some family pictures or something. But they did nothing at all. I think they showed off pictures of the trip to Mexico that week instead.
I just don't really understand how I'm this unworthy of their love and unfortunately now I'm realizing that illusion that I am unworthy has infected my relationship with my fiance. I love her so much but when I can't fix everything in her life I feel like I am the failure and the guilt overhelms me so much and the guilt is such a strong motivator for me, and it usually motivates me into becoming the biggest doormat in the world. I've never worked harder for a relationship or invested this much energy. I feel she deserves it. But I don't advocate for myself. So I build up resentment. Like I clean the house constantly and work and help bail out of her bad spending habits and cover her rent without question and this and that. To be clear, she doesn't take advantage of me and that's not how I feel about it. But I do let this annoyance build up inside of me because I don't know how to communicate my feelings in a healthy way. I'm scared I'll lose the person if I speak up, or I'll be gaslit. Again, that's not my partner that gaslights. That's just generally how I feel I'll be treated if I open up with people. It all goes back to my childhood. It's affected every friendship and work relationship I've had since.
When I was 20-ish, 15 years years ago I did the classic, "seek the relationship that most comfortably fits into the patterns you experienced with your parents". And so I trapped myself in a horrific and extremely damaging relationship with a girl I'll call K. She has undiagnosed bipolaBPD, she would never seek help but self-medicate. She ended up in the hospital maybe four times for self-harming and this where she was considered to have these diseases by a few doctors on different occasions. Anway, it turned into a relationship of abuse and it wasn't exactly new territory for me. I was ashamed in that 8 year relationship. I wanted out so bad, but she would threaten to unalive everytime I tried to get away. Of course, some weeks would go by and i would get my hair pulled out of my scalp, a knife waving in the air in front of my face, spat in the face, kicked, punched, bit, a pot of freshly boiled ramen soup thrown in my face and eyes. What's worse is that I seeked police intervention on multiple occasions. Every single time the police visited, they talked me out of pressing charges, asking me " well if she doesn't have any place to go, then do you have a place you can stay at, or the shelter?". twice they talked me out of a restraining order, that legal proceedings would take forever. Adn de-escalting me from wanting to take measures to ensure my safety because she may end up on the street as a result. To this day, I absolutely wish I advocated for myself here and pushed for a restraining order. I'm so mad at myself for not doing so.
Unfortunately, fast forward a couple years into that relationship and one evening everything would finally hit the fan. I told her to never touch me again and I absolutely meant it. she had just yanked out the largest chunk of my hair to date, to the point where my scalp was bleeding and I could even see epidermal matter still attached to the folicle ends that were in her clenched fingers. My head bled a bit and I pushed her off of me. Telling her that I needed to leave, that I was walking to my secure jam space just a 10 minute walk away. It had a leather couch in a cold concrete basement, but hey at least I would be safe for the night and I could play my drums and try and blow off this anxiety and fear in a way that was safe albeit very noisy.
She hated that I wanted to leave and convinced herself I would never return. To be fair, that was the energy I had. I never wanted to see her face again and have her name on my lips after that night. So her tactic was simple, to threaten me with calling the cops and tell them that I violently pushed her. I called her bluff and said "go ahead and I will just tell them everything you've done - yet again. All I am doing is going to the space to sleep, I said, maybe play drums." She called the cops and told them she was pushed into a wall, and she felt very unsafe. Which yes, I did push her off me when she attacked me. In the past, I tried various tactics, to run away didn't work, she just always chased me down. Or sometimes I would just sit there while she was violent against me and I just "dissapeared" kind of like how I would when my dad used his coat hanger. This time, I just pushed her off of me, I was done with the relationship at that point and we both knew it. Anyway, she called the police, they arrived and when questioned I told them that I pushed her off of me in self-defence. I was drinking that night and it didn't help my case as I was arrested without question that evening and I was charged on the spot without question with domestic assault. It devasted me. I asked the police how this could happen lawfully. That she is an abuser and there is a history of this multiple times. That I've requested a restraining order. They explained that in quebec the laws are a little different and in the case domestic cases, if there is a male aggressor against a female, then the male is automatically charged to the fullest extent. I was absolutelyu devasted by this. I can't tell you the amount of fear and anger I felt in that jail cell that night.
I feel so incredibly betrayed by the justice system, keep in mind, this is law that from what I understand is only in Quebec, I was there for music at the time with an old friend whom I am no longer in contact with. I don't think the rest of the country operates under law in this way. Now I appreciate that they are vigilant about woman abuse victims, but the law shouldn't be this absurdly biased. It just doesnt feel just and fair to me. Covert abusers shouldn't be able to take advantage of the justice system in this way, but it happens.
It was an awful experience, I was homeless for a couple months afterward, not allowed to retrieve my belongings, so I lost all of my life "crap" that I had built up, years of hardwork and investment. I mention this because I realize later in life that I have intense collecting behaviour. maybe as a self-soothing behaviour. But I love building up collections of my hobby stuff as I have many and I feel they keep me regulated and it's a form of therapy for me. In any case, I lost everything when I left that whole situation. It sucks, although ultimately it's clearly best that I got out of that dreadful circumstance. I flew across the country to my hometown and to be closer to my family and old friends from highschool. It's quite a small town mind you.
Unfortunately, my classic tendency to hide and not advocate for myself created an opportunity for my abusive ex. A year following those events, despite me assuring her that I had to block her because I flew away to start a new life provinces away. That I wished her the best. That I even promised I would never tell a soul what she did to me. Not to mention that unfortunately we live in a society where nobody really has an ounce of sympathy for a male abuse victim. I had every intention to keep that promise, but she couldn't trust me ultimately. I think her logic was maybe to just beat her ex to "the punch". Kill or be killed or something like that. I don't live my life like that so I don't really know what her plan was. But she made a bunch of posts on various social media platforms for all of our mutual friends, music friends, coworkers etc. that the relationship was over and she was free. That she got out of a cycle of abuse and she was ready to start a new chapter of her life. She never used my name, just that she was glad she got away from her toxic and abusive ex once and for all.
It was exactly like that night a year prior, she threatened me with this outcome she could design for me, and I called her on her bluff by saying I was still going to block her and I can't control what she does with her life or how she conducts herself, but that I was out and to never contact me ever again. She made me regret that decision.
The posts she made that day got so many likes and support from so many of our mutual friends, even musician mates that were closer to me than her, and it absolutely destroyed me, not just internally but socially. I no longer make music anymore and it hurts to go outside into the world because it feels like everybody sees me as this monster. And still I don't have a voice to inform anyone otherwise - except my family and my fiance. I have no friends anymore. They all left my life with the belief that I did all of these horrible and awful things.
I just don't trust people anymore as a result and it's just caused me to become extremely bitter and depressed. I ruminate on the past, maybe in attempts to fix the past so I can move on. So I could do better, so I don't have to punish myself for my mistakes in the past. But it just reopens every emotional wound I have and they never get a chance to heal. That was maybe 7 years ago now and I'm still replaying these events in my head every single morning for about 1 - 2 hrs. Then I go completely numb for the majority of the rest of the day, shallow breathing, and the mildest sadness that mascarades as fatigue and disinterest.
There are some days where I seriously fear for the future and I just feel like every cruel soul will inherit this earth and that's the future, they built this world of suffering and they deserve to inherit it. Their toxic flag staked so deep into the earth in reclamation. The future isn't holding any seats for people like us. I'm so heartbroken and defeated. I feel like white-wolfing my fiance because she deserves better than this traumatized person that hides from the world. I feel like giving her my collection of collections so she can sell it all off and pay off her 10k of credit debt, then with this act of kindness I can go out not feeling like a guilt-ridden defeated loser. And leave on a high note.
When I'm alone, I get trapped in these ruminating cycles and it's the angriest I ever get. It's reached the point where I feel like I am actually reliving all this past trauma every morning and I can't do it anymore. I just feel like I am so at the end of whatever this ride was.
I don't have any friends anymore and everyone but my fiance thinks I am a monster and it's just unbearable.
I just don't even know. I am even afraid that someone will read this post and suss through all of this and make the connection. Then I'll get another new email or random throwaway account with an insta message that says "I told you you would never be able to get over me. You can move on, but you will never be able to erase the past. Never truly. You know where to find me."
It's haunting and it's poisonous. I just feel haunted and poisoned and I don't know if there is a snake oil potent enough or antitode true enough to get me back to the generous, lighthearted, energetic kid I once was.
To whoever was willing to read through all of this, thank you for hearing me out. I don't know what advice I am even asking for here. I'm hoping just speaking this out into the world in some way can alleviate this misery. I don't know.
submitted by McComfortable to Healthygamergg [link] [comments]
I guess I'll begin at the beginning...
I had a difficult childhood with fairly neglectful parents. A mother who openly expressed she never felt she really stepped into her mom shoes until she gave birth to my younger sister, who is three years younger than me. She is my only sibling. My mother told me when I was a kid that she "had to love me", but when my sister came around "she was finally a mother and over the moon", or simply "I always always wanted a girl". I'm not sure if this could be attributed to Post-partum depression, not that she ever researched that or was daignosed with it. That's probably just me trying to pardon my mother or something to the effect. She was 17 when she had me and I'm sure times were different then, my parents both were raised religious, father christian, mother mormon. Maybe their guilt. I ask myself why they brought me into this world if I wasn't wanted to begin with. Or, give me up for adoption to a set of guardians that would have loved me better. I know I was an accident and that's not what gets me down, I get that life be lifing and what happened happened. My difficulties stem from the feeling that my presence never gave my mother any sense of purpose, responsibility or love, or concern. She was emotionally unavailable to me virtually my entire life and I feel like that caused many issues later in my life and how I perceive myself and what I deserve. Coupled with the fact that my neglect met such extremes that I am frankly shocked that I was never picked up by child care services, maybe things were different in the 90's. I'm not sure, I was just a child then.
Much of my upbringing I didn't receive a lot of the things most people would consider essential. As a baby my crib was the sock drawer, then I grew large enough to have a closet, then slept on the floor of a walk-in closet, then I had a single bed from what I recall for maybe a year or maybe two years and I remember feeling metal springs poke me in the my ribs and I recall it being uncomfortable enough for me to move back to sleeping on the floor next to the ratty old used mattress my father found from who knows where. I remember feeling like I had to keep that secret, that the mattress they gave me was uncomfortable enough for me to sneak sleeping on the floor next to it. I think I was really afraid as coming across as ungrateful. My father came from a third world country, so the "gratefullness issue" was address frequently by my mom because "I don't have it even half as bad as what my father had to endure. And she was probably right. But it just silenced me ultimately, didn't put things into a mature context for me. I just learned that I can't complain about anything ever. Anyway, that trend didn't really change when I grew older. grade 9-10 I was sleeping on the living room couch so my sister could have privacy and a bedroom to exist in for herself - which I realize is important for an individual so I encouraged her to have the bedroom. Although I figured my parents expected me to do this for my sister regardless. I was okay with making sacrfices for those I love, it was instilled in me from a very very young age.
I do feel like my father took advantage of me in the form of labour as well, having to do custodial work with my father from 10pm to 3am, at two highschools I believe he was contracted, at that young age I honestly enjoyed just spending time with my father I think, working alongside him. When I was in grade 2 and 3 I had garbage bag duty for all the students bathrooms, and I remember loving snapping the bags open by rushing air into the bag and making it blow up like a baloon. I remember the scary unlit shadowy hallways that I couldn't perceive the ends of. No bodies to see, it felt eerie but exciting in a way - like it was a whole different world.
School was a different experience for me. It was very stressful, my parents had to move a few times a year because they would dodge rent or just generally be selfish with their dual income. They loved to party hard on the weekends. I remember wondering why my father did this to himself all the time. Hoping that we could spend quality time on a saturday, but he wouldnt get out of bed until just before dinner. I didn't really understand hangovers or alcoholism and how it meant our plans would get cancelled. I think I remember trying to wrap my head around willful self-poisoning for entertainment and how could that be more enjoyable then spending time with your son? I couldn't tell my mother why I was so sad about it. Why I didn't want to move again and again and again. Why I found it so difficult to make new friends everytime I had to switch schools. Why I couldn't just do one single full school year with one class of students. It was so hard and at the time, I didn't know anything different. It was so hard to make friends and I think it created this approach to making a "new family" of friends when I became a teenager and young adult.
I remember always wanting to be a "good kid". The "best kid" for my parents. I feel like my parents attached this moniker to me that made things harder for me to mature into a rounded adult later in life. My parents always flaunted me as this point of accomplishment, the accomplishment that I was "so extremely well behaved". I would strive to be super polite, and a good host, try to help out when my parents had their friends over, literally fill their cups when the opportunity presented themselves. I think I did this because I must have made the conclusion that if I was quiet, super polite, helpful and useful then I had value. That I could be loved. That I could earn this love from my parents through acts of service.
I remember feeling like my sister and I had extremely different experiences growing up. When my parents were at work I took care of her, cleaned and cooked. one time my sister told my mom to eff off when she was 5 and I was 8. My mind was blown. I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that she had the bravery and courage to defy my mother. Looking back, my sister was just mirroring the language she learned from my parents from whenever they fought. I remembering seriously worrying and getting scared that my father was going to belt her, or use the coat hanger, which was his preference with me. I feel like my mom was always checked out and I'm hurt that she allowed my father to take his rage out on me. That my mom could care less about me being beat, but never my sibling. It was very confusing and difficult for me to process. Not that I really processed it much as a kid. I honestly just wanted to be loved and be the best child possible. Honestly though, 'm seriously so glad that my sister was spared all of that complete non-sense. I don't wish that on anyone in the world. There were some punishments where he would walk in and tell me to pull my pants down without explanation. I have memories of tearing up and saying I didn't know why this was happening, asking what I did wrong and he would just remind me that if I resisted then I would get it worse and to hurry up and get ready. My father has since apologized. I think it is how he was raised. I didn't know what to say in response, but I told him I loved him and it's in the past. But I don't know if I was being honest when I said that. My mother would still gaslight me to this day if any of this became topic of discussion, not that I'm guessing. A year ago she told me that much of my pained memories were false and this never happened. My father on the other hand typically stays pensive and unchallenging.
It seems so damned crazy writing all of this out, it feels like a heartbreaking novel and not my life at all. But it was and is my life. I have difficulties opening up and expressing my feelings and advocating for myself when the moments are true and appropriate to do so. I know it's the healthier way to communicate, but I was literally taught to stay quiet and be useful. Fast forward 20-25 years and I'm going to be 35 and I feel like just ending it all. Every year my birthday passes and I'll get a text from my family happy birthday. But they know I'm in a difficult place, they know I miss them, they know I love them and forgive them, I try the high road whenever I can but I just don't see the point anymore. they won't celebrate my life and existence, but they'll throw family gatherings for each other, birthdays, christmas, fathers day and mothers day.
On that note, another mother's day has recently passed and my mother never invited me over, I texted my father three weeks in advance in hopes of securing a time to come over and celebrate my mothers life with my family as a family. I felt particularly stung this mother's day when they celebrated and didn't text or call to invite me over. I live in the same small town so it's easy to hop over. I literally live three blocks away.
Anyway, my mother was diagnosed with cancer over christmas this year and I have been worrying for my mother ever since and thinking about my life with her and the mortal coil and the finite mount of time I may have with her. I feel like there is a large empty part in my heart that wishes my mother and I could go grab a coffee together. She can show me her ipad app art that she has been really excited about for a couple years now. She loves showing off her digital art and I love seeing her joy and how proud she is about her art. I just don't know why she couldn't feel the same for me, her only son. Maybe I'm just a her dissapointment.
I dropped out of highschool and left the family home when I was 16. I just couldn't work for my dad during the night AND go to highschool AND socialize. Something had to give. Unfortunately it was highschool and my parents didn't really care about that at all. They were just... fine with it. they supported my sister through college and she was fortunately able to graduate with a veterinary degree of sorts. she still lives with them now as she pays off her student debt, but I left and travelled and worked on music for over a decade so I admit that I was entirely out of the family picture for some time. But as I get older, not wanting to repeat the mistakes of my parents I fear that that is precisely what's been creeping up in my life.
five years ago I met the absolute most wonderful human being and I am so lucky to have my partner in my life. She and I are engaged now and set to be married. I hoped that the news would overwhelm my parents with excitement and joy. Maybe a facebook post about their son, share some family pictures or something. But they did nothing at all. I think they showed off pictures of the trip to Mexico that week instead.
I just don't really understand how I'm this unworthy of their love and unfortunately now I'm realizing that illusion that I am unworthy has infected my relationship with my fiance. I love her so much but when I can't fix everything in her life I feel like I am the failure and the guilt overhelms me so much and the guilt is such a strong motivator for me, and it usually motivates me into becoming the biggest doormat in the world. I've never worked harder for a relationship or invested this much energy. I feel she deserves it. But I don't advocate for myself. So I build up resentment. Like I clean the house constantly and work and help bail out of her bad spending habits and cover her rent without question and this and that. To be clear, she doesn't take advantage of me and that's not how I feel about it. But I do let this annoyance build up inside of me because I don't know how to communicate my feelings in a healthy way. I'm scared I'll lose the person if I speak up, or I'll be gaslit. Again, that's not my partner that gaslights. That's just generally how I feel I'll be treated if I open up with people. It all goes back to my childhood. It's affected every friendship and work relationship I've had since.
When I was 20-ish, 15 years years ago I did the classic, "seek the relationship that most comfortably fits into the patterns you experienced with your parents". And so I trapped myself in a horrific and extremely damaging relationship with a girl I'll call K. She has undiagnosed bipolaBPD, she would never seek help but self-medicate. She ended up in the hospital maybe four times for self-harming and this where she was considered to have these diseases by a few doctors on different occasions. Anway, it turned into a relationship of abuse and it wasn't exactly new territory for me. I was ashamed in that 8 year relationship. I wanted out so bad, but she would threaten to unalive everytime I tried to get away. Of course, some weeks would go by and i would get my hair pulled out of my scalp, a knife waving in the air in front of my face, spat in the face, kicked, punched, bit, a pot of freshly boiled ramen soup thrown in my face and eyes. What's worse is that I seeked police intervention on multiple occasions. Every single time the police visited, they talked me out of pressing charges, asking me " well if she doesn't have any place to go, then do you have a place you can stay at, or the shelter?". twice they talked me out of a restraining order, that legal proceedings would take forever. Adn de-escalting me from wanting to take measures to ensure my safety because she may end up on the street as a result. To this day, I absolutely wish I advocated for myself here and pushed for a restraining order. I'm so mad at myself for not doing so.
Unfortunately, fast forward a couple years into that relationship and one evening everything would finally hit the fan. I told her to never touch me again and I absolutely meant it. she had just yanked out the largest chunk of my hair to date, to the point where my scalp was bleeding and I could even see epidermal matter still attached to the folicle ends that were in her clenched fingers. My head bled a bit and I pushed her off of me. Telling her that I needed to leave, that I was walking to my secure jam space just a 10 minute walk away. It had a leather couch in a cold concrete basement, but hey at least I would be safe for the night and I could play my drums and try and blow off this anxiety and fear in a way that was safe albeit very noisy.
She hated that I wanted to leave and convinced herself I would never return. To be fair, that was the energy I had. I never wanted to see her face again and have her name on my lips after that night. So her tactic was simple, to threaten me with calling the cops and tell them that I violently pushed her. I called her bluff and said "go ahead and I will just tell them everything you've done - yet again. All I am doing is going to the space to sleep, I said, maybe play drums." She called the cops and told them she was pushed into a wall, and she felt very unsafe. Which yes, I did push her off me when she attacked me. In the past, I tried various tactics, to run away didn't work, she just always chased me down. Or sometimes I would just sit there while she was violent against me and I just "dissapeared" kind of like how I would when my dad used his coat hanger. This time, I just pushed her off of me, I was done with the relationship at that point and we both knew it. Anyway, she called the police, they arrived and when questioned I told them that I pushed her off of me in self-defence. I was drinking that night and it didn't help my case as I was arrested without question that evening and I was charged on the spot without question with domestic assault. It devasted me. I asked the police how this could happen lawfully. That she is an abuser and there is a history of this multiple times. That I've requested a restraining order. They explained that in quebec the laws are a little different and in the case domestic cases, if there is a male aggressor against a female, then the male is automatically charged to the fullest extent. I was absolutelyu devasted by this. I can't tell you the amount of fear and anger I felt in that jail cell that night.
I feel so incredibly betrayed by the justice system, keep in mind, this is law that from what I understand is only in Quebec, I was there for music at the time with an old friend whom I am no longer in contact with. I don't think the rest of the country operates under law in this way. Now I appreciate that they are vigilant about woman abuse victims, but the law shouldn't be this absurdly biased. It just doesnt feel just and fair to me. Covert abusers shouldn't be able to take advantage of the justice system in this way, but it happens.
It was an awful experience, I was homeless for a couple months afterward, not allowed to retrieve my belongings, so I lost all of my life "crap" that I had built up, years of hardwork and investment. I mention this because I realize later in life that I have intense collecting behaviour. maybe as a self-soothing behaviour. But I love building up collections of my hobby stuff as I have many and I feel they keep me regulated and it's a form of therapy for me. In any case, I lost everything when I left that whole situation. It sucks, although ultimately it's clearly best that I got out of that dreadful circumstance. I flew across the country to my hometown and to be closer to my family and old friends from highschool. It's quite a small town mind you.
Unfortunately, my classic tendency to hide and not advocate for myself created an opportunity for my abusive ex. A year following those events, despite me assuring her that I had to block her because I flew away to start a new life provinces away. That I wished her the best. That I even promised I would never tell a soul what she did to me. Not to mention that unfortunately we live in a society where nobody really has an ounce of sympathy for a male abuse victim. I had every intention to keep that promise, but she couldn't trust me ultimately. I think her logic was maybe to just beat her ex to "the punch". Kill or be killed or something like that. I don't live my life like that so I don't really know what her plan was. But she made a bunch of posts on various social media platforms for all of our mutual friends, music friends, coworkers etc. that the relationship was over and she was free. That she got out of a cycle of abuse and she was ready to start a new chapter of her life. She never used my name, just that she was glad she got away from her toxic and abusive ex once and for all.
It was exactly like that night a year prior, she threatened me with this outcome she could design for me, and I called her on her bluff by saying I was still going to block her and I can't control what she does with her life or how she conducts herself, but that I was out and to never contact me ever again. She made me regret that decision.
The posts she made that day got so many likes and support from so many of our mutual friends, even musician mates that were closer to me than her, and it absolutely destroyed me, not just internally but socially. I no longer make music anymore and it hurts to go outside into the world because it feels like everybody sees me as this monster. And still I don't have a voice to inform anyone otherwise - except my family and my fiance. I have no friends anymore. They all left my life with the belief that I did all of these horrible and awful things.
I just don't trust people anymore as a result and it's just caused me to become extremely bitter and depressed. I ruminate on the past, maybe in attempts to fix the past so I can move on. So I could do better, so I don't have to punish myself for my mistakes in the past. But it just reopens every emotional wound I have and they never get a chance to heal. That was maybe 7 years ago now and I'm still replaying these events in my head every single morning for about 1 - 2 hrs. Then I go completely numb for the majority of the rest of the day, shallow breathing, and the mildest sadness that mascarades as fatigue and disinterest.
There are some days where I seriously fear for the future and I just feel like every cruel soul will inherit this earth and that's the future, they built this world of suffering and they deserve to inherit it. Their toxic flag staked so deep into the earth in reclamation. The future isn't holding any seats for people like us. I'm so heartbroken and defeated. I feel like white-wolfing my fiance because she deserves better than this traumatized person that hides from the world. I feel like giving her my collection of collections so she can sell it all off and pay off her 10k of credit debt, then with this act of kindness I can go out not feeling like a guilt-ridden defeated loser. And leave on a high note.
When I'm alone, I get trapped in these ruminating cycles and it's the angriest I ever get. It's reached the point where I feel like I am actually reliving all this past trauma every morning and I can't do it anymore. I just feel like I am so at the end of whatever this ride was.
I don't have any friends anymore and everyone but my fiance thinks I am a monster and it's just unbearable.
I just don't even know. I am even afraid that someone will read this post and suss through all of this and make the connection. Then I'll get another new email or random throwaway account with an insta message that says "I told you you would never be able to get over me. You can move on, but you will never be able to erase the past. Never truly. You know where to find me."
It's haunting and it's poisonous. I just feel haunted and poisoned and I don't know if there is a snake oil potent enough or antitode true enough to get me back to the generous, lighthearted, energetic kid I once was.
To whoever was willing to read through all of this, thank you for hearing me out. I don't know what advice I am even asking for here. I'm hoping just speaking this out into the world in some way can alleviate this misery. I don't know.
2024.05.14 08:33 Endore555 Are you Scared of the Smiling Critters Plushies?
 | I was reading reviews of the Dogday plush and found this recent one which I thought was funny. But also gave me the question of if people actually find the official plushies of these guys scary? Personally I don’t think they’re that creepy, I’m pretty sure they’re made to be less scary than the in game versions so they’re cute to me. However, I think a group of them together in a dark room would cause any unsuspecting person to jump, team effort. submitted by Endore555 to PoppyPlaytime [link] [comments] |
2024.05.14 08:32 Isheiwodn 50k Prize Pool and I'm thinking about a lawsuit.
Hey y'all, first time user of this subreddit because I don't typically do fantasy basketball but this opportunity that approached me last year was too good not to take; and I'm in desperate need of advice. Long story short, a person that I trust very much in my life and is well integrated into my family and extended family offered me to play for him in his fantasy league, where the buy in was 5k and "if we win, you can have it all." This hasn't been the first time I've played for him either. I played in the same league a few years ago with the same group of guys.
Skipping past the whole league and its ups and downs; I win it. I had sole control of his account and made every single waiver wire move, trade request/accept/decline, and all of the research involved in a fantasy league. Hours upon hours looking at advanced stats and watching tape. The only thing I didn't do, was draft (but I was on call with him and giving real time advice for who to buy etc etc).
I have receipts of him confirming the buy in amount at the beginning of the league and promising me it would be all mine if I won. Here's a few of the wrenches in the gearbox though:
"What was the buy in amount then lol ? If it got changed half way thru the season I should’ve known"
What is really funny is that he completely ignored it and sent me a happy birthday message a week later. The payout equates for much more than a years worth of wages. I dedicated a lot of time to it that I could have spent studying for university.I can definitely find a way of contacting his brother to find out what is really happening in the league and ask about the buy in amount. But there is the off chance that he also knows what is happening. If push comes to shove I can stalk their instagram accounts and find the other people in the league to ask about what is happening. Obviously I do not want this to go to civil court because most of the money is going to be thrown into lawyers and legal fees.
Please ask for any clarifying questions, I'm sure I missed some details.
submitted by Isheiwodn to fantasybball [link] [comments]
Skipping past the whole league and its ups and downs; I win it. I had sole control of his account and made every single waiver wire move, trade request/accept/decline, and all of the research involved in a fantasy league. Hours upon hours looking at advanced stats and watching tape. The only thing I didn't do, was draft (but I was on call with him and giving real time advice for who to buy etc etc).
I have receipts of him confirming the buy in amount at the beginning of the league and promising me it would be all mine if I won. Here's a few of the wrenches in the gearbox though:
- His brother is the commissioner of the league
- They committed the cardinal sin of not collecting the buy in cash at the beginning
- I have no one's contact information except for him and his brother
- There was a redraft because Devin Booker got sold for $1 at auction on accident (more on this later)
"What was the buy in amount then lol ? If it got changed half way thru the season I should’ve known"
What is really funny is that he completely ignored it and sent me a happy birthday message a week later. The payout equates for much more than a years worth of wages. I dedicated a lot of time to it that I could have spent studying for university.I can definitely find a way of contacting his brother to find out what is really happening in the league and ask about the buy in amount. But there is the off chance that he also knows what is happening. If push comes to shove I can stalk their instagram accounts and find the other people in the league to ask about what is happening. Obviously I do not want this to go to civil court because most of the money is going to be thrown into lawyers and legal fees.
Please ask for any clarifying questions, I'm sure I missed some details.
2024.05.14 08:30 Mobile-Ask-246 22F 25M scared to stop looking while Im still young, but is he the one?
We met 3 months ago via a local FaceBook group for musicians looking to join bands. We like the same music and created a band w 2 other ppl we met on there. We met up IRL same week and we have been dating since! Seeing each other 3-4 times a week so pretty much all our free time is spent together.
He is extremely handsome, very caring, thoughtful, has same interests as me, and very kind. Only thing is he isn't rly funny (he always tells me i am tho), i think we do not have the same humor. But ive learnt to live with that and enjoy his other qualities. Sex is great too.
He has to move for work in September (2h train away) but he says he wants to make this work and will visit every weekend. We are going on a road trip together in 2 weeks (just a weekend). We already met each other's friends. He even invited me to his hometown (i assume i would have met his parents) but i didnt accept yet.
Can the LDR work? Is he the one? If not, I feel I should continue dating around now while im still young and pretty.
submitted by Mobile-Ask-246 to dating_advice [link] [comments]
He is extremely handsome, very caring, thoughtful, has same interests as me, and very kind. Only thing is he isn't rly funny (he always tells me i am tho), i think we do not have the same humor. But ive learnt to live with that and enjoy his other qualities. Sex is great too.
He has to move for work in September (2h train away) but he says he wants to make this work and will visit every weekend. We are going on a road trip together in 2 weeks (just a weekend). We already met each other's friends. He even invited me to his hometown (i assume i would have met his parents) but i didnt accept yet.
Can the LDR work? Is he the one? If not, I feel I should continue dating around now while im still young and pretty.
2024.05.14 08:30 Mobile-Ask-246 22F 25M scared to stop looking while Im still young, but is he the one?
We met 3 months ago via a local FaceBook group for musicians looking to join bands. We like the same music and created a band w 2 other ppl we met on there. We met up IRL same week and we have been dating since! Seeing each other 3-4 times a week so pretty much all our free time is spent together.
He is extremely handsome, very caring, thoughtful, has same interests as me, and very kind. Only thing is he isn't rly funny (he always tells me i am tho), i think we do not have the same humor. But ive learnt to live with that and enjoy his other qualities. Sex is great too.
He has to move for work in September (2h train away) but he says he wants to make this work and will visit every weekend. We are going on a road trip together in 2 weeks (just a weekend). We already met each other's friends. He even invited me to his hometown (i assume i would have met his parents) but i didnt accept yet.
Can the LDR work? Is he the one? If not, I feel I should continue dating around now while im still young and pretty.
submitted by Mobile-Ask-246 to dating [link] [comments]
He is extremely handsome, very caring, thoughtful, has same interests as me, and very kind. Only thing is he isn't rly funny (he always tells me i am tho), i think we do not have the same humor. But ive learnt to live with that and enjoy his other qualities. Sex is great too.
He has to move for work in September (2h train away) but he says he wants to make this work and will visit every weekend. We are going on a road trip together in 2 weeks (just a weekend). We already met each other's friends. He even invited me to his hometown (i assume i would have met his parents) but i didnt accept yet.
Can the LDR work? Is he the one? If not, I feel I should continue dating around now while im still young and pretty.
2024.05.14 08:29 Mobile-Ask-246 22F 25M scared to stop looking while Im still young, but is he the one?
We met 3 months ago via a local FaceBook group for musicians looking to join bands. We like the same music and created a band w 2 other ppl we met on there. We met up IRL same week and we have been dating since! Seeing each other 3-4 times a week so pretty much all our free time is spent together.
He is extremely handsome, very caring, thoughtful, has same interests as me, and very kind. Only thing is he isn't rly funny (he always tells me i am tho), i think we do not have the same humor. But ive learnt to live with that and enjoy his other qualities. Sex is great too.
He has to move for work in September (2h train away) but he says he wants to make this work and will visit every weekend. We are going on a road trip together in 2 weeks (just a weekend). We already met each other's friends. He even invited me to his hometown (i assume i would have met his parents) but i didnt accept yet.
TL;DR: Can the LDR work? Is he the one? If not, I feel I should continue dating around now while im still young and pretty.
submitted by Mobile-Ask-246 to relationships [link] [comments]
He is extremely handsome, very caring, thoughtful, has same interests as me, and very kind. Only thing is he isn't rly funny (he always tells me i am tho), i think we do not have the same humor. But ive learnt to live with that and enjoy his other qualities. Sex is great too.
He has to move for work in September (2h train away) but he says he wants to make this work and will visit every weekend. We are going on a road trip together in 2 weeks (just a weekend). We already met each other's friends. He even invited me to his hometown (i assume i would have met his parents) but i didnt accept yet.
TL;DR: Can the LDR work? Is he the one? If not, I feel I should continue dating around now while im still young and pretty.
2024.05.14 08:26 pheakelmatters Cliffsnotes for the Pascal interview
Full interview: https://www.youtube.com/live/0hIyE8jSzYg?si=iY6Rzyqe5upSJkBz
My last thought... An hour and 41 minutes. That's how long that live stream was and the majority of it was Seth and Tony addressing drama that Seth and Tony and basically everyone that wasn't the Proudfoot's created (with the possible exception for Chris calling in to Cluemaniti). At no point did the stream put up a picture of Sebastian. At no point did anyone say or show the number for the tip line. At no point did Seth mention what areas his volunteer searches have covered. At no point did Seth outline areas that still need to be searched. At no point did Seth give insight to Sebastian's personality that could help indentify him. If this was the very first thing I'd had seen about this case I'd know all about Seth and Tony and how they feel about things.. but Sebastian would be pretty much a mystery.
submitted by pheakelmatters to SebastianRogers [link] [comments]
- Seth confirms the PI's exit was due to Tony's involvement.
- Seth said he likes Tony because Tony does whatever he tells him
- Seth says the PI's didn't share all information with him and weren't checking up on leads. Seth says it's his operation, not theirs.
- Tony and Seth say the Proudfoot's aren't working with them, and Tony's job was to get them on board with Seth.
- Seth said the leaked phone call of Chris Proudfoot interfered with getting the Proudfoot's on board. Tony rebukes Chris Proudfoot for calling into Cluemaniti with fake voices. (note: there's still no proof this was actually CP. If anyone can link clear evidence of this please do so)
- Tony claims Chris Proudfoot agreed not to do social media but did it anyway, said "he's not a good guy".
- Tony said he was Seth's agent for the latest Nancy Grace appearance in regards to the polygraph he took.
- Tony said he had an agreement with Nancy Grace's producers that the interview would not paint the Proudfoot's in a bad light. He said when the polygraph administrator said Seth told him he believes Katie accidentally OD'd Sebastian he advised Seth to hang up immediately, which Seth complied with.
- Seth confirmed this account from Tony. Seth said the polygraph administrator ask for his top three theories on what might have happened to Sebastian. Seth said he said the OD theory and an additional two more, but the polygraph administrator only focused on that one.
- Tony said he spoke with Nancy Grace's team afterwards and that's why this part was edited out later on.
- When asked if Seth actually believes the OD theory he evaded the question.
- Seth rebukes people for worrying too much about Chris Proudfoot's ex-wife and other drama.
- Seth talks about his physical search during the first couple of weeks. Goes on to rebuke people "running their mouth". He's venting quite a bit. (IMO he deserves a break here)
- Seth shut down the GoFundMe because of "grief" about it. Said he used the funds for flyers and other things like that. (Fair. I admit to thinking it was more nefarious than what it likely was)
- Seth is being quite genuine during this venting. (I'd hug him, no lie)
- Tony rebukes Pascal's chat.
- Tony talks about how awesome he is, and what a saint he is for helping Seth.
- Seth rebukes soical media vultures. (Even though he's on social media vulture Pascal).
- Tony once again talks about how awesome he is.
- Seth praises Tony for doing whatever he tells him
- Tony rebukes social media vultures, on social media vulture Pascal. Tony says it's okay to make money off of Seth's missing child, and rebukes them, and then says it's okay again. Then rebukes them again.
- Seth says he has no social media and listens to Tony to stay off of YouTube... While he's on YouTube. Seth rebukes someone for commenting on his weight.
- Seth praises his volunteer searchers for putting their health and safety on the line.... Rebukes people that say bad things about him online.
- Seth thanks the parents of the North Carolina boy that was thought to be Sebastian for giving him a few brief days of hope.
- Seth has not seen all the footage the police have. Seth says there is dashcam footage the police have. Evaded all followup questions.
- Tony says he has no idea about dashcam footage
- Tony says neither of them have talked to Seth's mom about her Facebook posts, but they don't blame her. Tony says she is just venting.
- Tony talks about how awesome he is for not blaming Calib's grandmother either. (Another case he worked on)
- Seth apologizes for cutting Tony off, stands up for his mom. Says she's feeling very helpless, and he is too. Rebukes people for sending stuff to his both him and his mom.
- Seth says he obtained Sebastian's CPS file. Says he won't share it, says his attorney told him not to.
- Sumner county has this file. Seth says TBI didn't have it. Seth clarified he has a redacted copy. Says Tony hasn't seen it.
- Tony speaks with authority on it even though Seth said he hadn't seen it.
- Seth rebukes Pascal for prying the issue.
- Something something Church. Seth challenged Pascal to come to the next vigil, Pascal agrees. Let's hold him to that. It's on the 19th!
- Seth says if Sumner Sheriff and TBI won't clear him than they (meaning the Proudfoot's) aren't cleared either. (This is an interesting statement!)
- Pascal than spends the rest of the interview making money from reading superchats priced $5-$50. He made good bank.
My last thought... An hour and 41 minutes. That's how long that live stream was and the majority of it was Seth and Tony addressing drama that Seth and Tony and basically everyone that wasn't the Proudfoot's created (with the possible exception for Chris calling in to Cluemaniti). At no point did the stream put up a picture of Sebastian. At no point did anyone say or show the number for the tip line. At no point did Seth mention what areas his volunteer searches have covered. At no point did Seth outline areas that still need to be searched. At no point did Seth give insight to Sebastian's personality that could help indentify him. If this was the very first thing I'd had seen about this case I'd know all about Seth and Tony and how they feel about things.. but Sebastian would be pretty much a mystery.
2024.05.14 08:19 one_day_at_noon I (32F) am hurt my (34M) fiancé didn’t support me getting a couch and I can’t tell if it’s irrational to be upset about it or if he was in the right to be pissed?
TL:dr- my guy got upset at me for having to haul a sectional down 3 flights of stairs, even though I didn’t KNOW it was on the third floor, and I’m simply upset he was angry at me over something I didn’t know and made something I was so excited to get into an unpleasant experience
To preface I adore furniture. Not only did I use to sell furniture, my mother reupholstered furniture and I wanted to be an interior designer. One of my proudest achievements in my life was decorating my first apt in amazingly nice furniture pieces over 3 years while living in poverty. One of the saddest things was having to sell all the furniture. I pintrest furniture. I scroll Facebook marketplace for furniture as a pass-time and daydream. At one point in my life it was the MOST fun hobby ever to go on day long trips to travel to other states to pick up cool furniture I’d found there. So you could say furniture is a deep love of mine.
What’s troubled me is in the last 4 years we had to downsize ALL my furniture because moving into a VERY small living area. The sale of all the furniture went into our saving. His hobby is house plants- a much easier hobby to fit in a home. So about half our living space is dedicated to his hobby. I’ve been pretty miserable unable to decorate for 4 years, and I’ve been pretty open about this. We’ve also been saving for a house so while I don’t begrudge him spending a 100 or so a month on his hobby; there’s no room to justify me spending say 200 on an antique writing desk we can’t fit here.
About 4 months ago I found my dream bedroom suite. When I say it was a dream I mean I’ve been looking for this EXACT furniture set every week for almost 8 years. I found it, for $400 for what’s around 8k worth of furniture- it was a 6hr drive and a headache to pick up. Without help to move it I missed out on the set. I was devastated. It was actually really upsetting because it’s something I knew I’d never find again in my price range. He reassured it me wasn’t a big deal and that I’d find it again. I won’t, I know, because I’ve been looking for that set for a decade. I explained to him that this was a passion and a great love of mine, it makes me feel at home in my space and expressed where I live. Relaxed. I explained how important decorating my home was to me and how glum I’ve been not being able to do it for years now. I asked him if next time we found a piece that worked in our budget if he would REALLY make an effort to help me get it because it was really important to me that he support my hobby the way I support his: I’ve learned about every hobby he has and listen in earnest, memorizing all the little things so I can talk to him about it. He likes to collect mugs- I made him a mug display, he likes to garden-I buy him exotic plants, he likes dinosaurs-I take the day off work to drive 2hrs both ways to pick up some rare dino collectibles. He says he will and I’m ecstatic, and begin talking about all the great adventures we’ll have collecting interesting pieces for our home.
One day he says the couch is old and hurts his back, he mentions it for about a month. I’m exstatic! Because it’s the only piece of furniture we have to sit on in our small home. I’m dedicated to finding us a really really nice one second hand, one he’ll like too, one that has back support, one we can cuddle on. I hunt for a week and he vetos several that he doesn’t like but I find a $2000 couch in good condition for 100. I’m so excited it’s actually in our budget, it’ll fit in our small space, it’s perfect! I feel accomplished, I feel motivated, I feel EXCITED to decorate the house. This is the most excited I’ve been to buy anything in YEARS. I’m giddy. Actual childlike glee!
When we get there to pick up the couch we realize the sellers didn’t happen to mention it was on the third floor. It’s a sectional but lightweight. I specifically picked so we could arrange it in our tiny space to have lots of little spots to read. And I can tell instantly this is going to be a problem. He’s going to get upset. I’m so worried he’ll be upset I try to overly positively handle everything- and get injured several times just trying to get it over quick and simple. And arm of the couch slams me in the throat and my hand gets rammed into a wall blood bruising my thumb. He’s uncharacteristicly unconcerned I’m hurt. All the climbing makes us both sick and shaky, so I suggest we sit and wait to fill better in the Ac before driving home.
When we head back I become very aware he’s not talking to me. He’s angry. I already know it. I try to apologize, to make things better, to explain I didn’t know that it was on the third floor and wouldn’t have got it if I had. That it was just a great deal and worked great for what we needed and it was in our budget (it’s almost impossible to find anything in our budget) and that we wouldn’t have been able to get anything near as nice so cheaply, that I’m sorry I know it was more than what he signed up to help me with and if I had known I would have paid family to help move it or thought of something else. I know his annoyance is justified. he explains it to me and to his merit he does it calmly, but he’s still upset at me- not just for the stairs, but for the drive, and for getting a sectional to begin with when “all we needed” was a cheap small love seat, he doesn’t GET IT and he’s pissed
He tried to be nice about it but he’s miserable and mad at me and doesn’t at all get why I was excited over it. By the end I feel a bit choked up, and teary eyed. I’m not a crier but I suppose he must have seen me tearing up because he clarifies he wants to support my hobby but doesn’t get it.
Yes things went arry but I thought it was almost a funny mishap, it wasn’t too bad getting the piece, we saved thousands of dollars, it’s the only NICE piece in our house and I was so excited to impress him with it. That he was angry, that he wasn’t even worried I was hurt- just ripped through me. Getting that piece of furniture, the first piece of furniture we bought together for our first home together meant a lot to me. To try to show him I wanted us to have something nice together I moved our old ripped up couch out by myself, scrubbed cleaned and arranged the new furniture by myself and moved every piece of it I could by myself. I also cleaned and arrange the living so that he could comfortably sit and enjoy the new seating in a well organized clean space. I stayed up for hours doing it alone till my body ached. But he’s still upset with me and I’ve lost all the “happiness” I had to decorate with him, I just feel embarrassed and sad. I don’t think I’ll be able to ask him to go with me again to get a piece, I don’t think he’d want to. It all just got so bungled. I just feel…. Like it was a missed opportunity to laugh and make a good memory, now it’s a bad memory I think will stick around.
I had hoped we’d travel together getting new pieces and making new memories. Now I just know we never will.
submitted by one_day_at_noon to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
To preface I adore furniture. Not only did I use to sell furniture, my mother reupholstered furniture and I wanted to be an interior designer. One of my proudest achievements in my life was decorating my first apt in amazingly nice furniture pieces over 3 years while living in poverty. One of the saddest things was having to sell all the furniture. I pintrest furniture. I scroll Facebook marketplace for furniture as a pass-time and daydream. At one point in my life it was the MOST fun hobby ever to go on day long trips to travel to other states to pick up cool furniture I’d found there. So you could say furniture is a deep love of mine.
What’s troubled me is in the last 4 years we had to downsize ALL my furniture because moving into a VERY small living area. The sale of all the furniture went into our saving. His hobby is house plants- a much easier hobby to fit in a home. So about half our living space is dedicated to his hobby. I’ve been pretty miserable unable to decorate for 4 years, and I’ve been pretty open about this. We’ve also been saving for a house so while I don’t begrudge him spending a 100 or so a month on his hobby; there’s no room to justify me spending say 200 on an antique writing desk we can’t fit here.
About 4 months ago I found my dream bedroom suite. When I say it was a dream I mean I’ve been looking for this EXACT furniture set every week for almost 8 years. I found it, for $400 for what’s around 8k worth of furniture- it was a 6hr drive and a headache to pick up. Without help to move it I missed out on the set. I was devastated. It was actually really upsetting because it’s something I knew I’d never find again in my price range. He reassured it me wasn’t a big deal and that I’d find it again. I won’t, I know, because I’ve been looking for that set for a decade. I explained to him that this was a passion and a great love of mine, it makes me feel at home in my space and expressed where I live. Relaxed. I explained how important decorating my home was to me and how glum I’ve been not being able to do it for years now. I asked him if next time we found a piece that worked in our budget if he would REALLY make an effort to help me get it because it was really important to me that he support my hobby the way I support his: I’ve learned about every hobby he has and listen in earnest, memorizing all the little things so I can talk to him about it. He likes to collect mugs- I made him a mug display, he likes to garden-I buy him exotic plants, he likes dinosaurs-I take the day off work to drive 2hrs both ways to pick up some rare dino collectibles. He says he will and I’m ecstatic, and begin talking about all the great adventures we’ll have collecting interesting pieces for our home.
One day he says the couch is old and hurts his back, he mentions it for about a month. I’m exstatic! Because it’s the only piece of furniture we have to sit on in our small home. I’m dedicated to finding us a really really nice one second hand, one he’ll like too, one that has back support, one we can cuddle on. I hunt for a week and he vetos several that he doesn’t like but I find a $2000 couch in good condition for 100. I’m so excited it’s actually in our budget, it’ll fit in our small space, it’s perfect! I feel accomplished, I feel motivated, I feel EXCITED to decorate the house. This is the most excited I’ve been to buy anything in YEARS. I’m giddy. Actual childlike glee!
When we get there to pick up the couch we realize the sellers didn’t happen to mention it was on the third floor. It’s a sectional but lightweight. I specifically picked so we could arrange it in our tiny space to have lots of little spots to read. And I can tell instantly this is going to be a problem. He’s going to get upset. I’m so worried he’ll be upset I try to overly positively handle everything- and get injured several times just trying to get it over quick and simple. And arm of the couch slams me in the throat and my hand gets rammed into a wall blood bruising my thumb. He’s uncharacteristicly unconcerned I’m hurt. All the climbing makes us both sick and shaky, so I suggest we sit and wait to fill better in the Ac before driving home.
When we head back I become very aware he’s not talking to me. He’s angry. I already know it. I try to apologize, to make things better, to explain I didn’t know that it was on the third floor and wouldn’t have got it if I had. That it was just a great deal and worked great for what we needed and it was in our budget (it’s almost impossible to find anything in our budget) and that we wouldn’t have been able to get anything near as nice so cheaply, that I’m sorry I know it was more than what he signed up to help me with and if I had known I would have paid family to help move it or thought of something else. I know his annoyance is justified. he explains it to me and to his merit he does it calmly, but he’s still upset at me- not just for the stairs, but for the drive, and for getting a sectional to begin with when “all we needed” was a cheap small love seat, he doesn’t GET IT and he’s pissed
He tried to be nice about it but he’s miserable and mad at me and doesn’t at all get why I was excited over it. By the end I feel a bit choked up, and teary eyed. I’m not a crier but I suppose he must have seen me tearing up because he clarifies he wants to support my hobby but doesn’t get it.
Yes things went arry but I thought it was almost a funny mishap, it wasn’t too bad getting the piece, we saved thousands of dollars, it’s the only NICE piece in our house and I was so excited to impress him with it. That he was angry, that he wasn’t even worried I was hurt- just ripped through me. Getting that piece of furniture, the first piece of furniture we bought together for our first home together meant a lot to me. To try to show him I wanted us to have something nice together I moved our old ripped up couch out by myself, scrubbed cleaned and arranged the new furniture by myself and moved every piece of it I could by myself. I also cleaned and arrange the living so that he could comfortably sit and enjoy the new seating in a well organized clean space. I stayed up for hours doing it alone till my body ached. But he’s still upset with me and I’ve lost all the “happiness” I had to decorate with him, I just feel embarrassed and sad. I don’t think I’ll be able to ask him to go with me again to get a piece, I don’t think he’d want to. It all just got so bungled. I just feel…. Like it was a missed opportunity to laugh and make a good memory, now it’s a bad memory I think will stick around.
I had hoped we’d travel together getting new pieces and making new memories. Now I just know we never will.
2024.05.14 08:18 Any-Possession7743 Professor used chatGPT to make midterm question very hard
I had a midterm exam this semester, where the exam was very hard and very long, and not possible to finish. In the last few classes of the semester, the professor revealed to class that he used chatGPT to make the midterm question. I actually found this funny and couldnt stop laughing when thinking about it. What are your thoughts on this?
submitted by Any-Possession7743 to UNC [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 08:09 just_melancholia How to set boundaries with my racist narcissistic mother?
For context, I’m a 25yo female, that comes from a mixed background (my mother 56F is a white woman from southern Europe, my father is from the Balkans and migrated to my country when he was younger). This is relevant and you will understand later.
I moved away from home as soon as I could when I was 18 after a not so good childhood, and currently live in another European country. My parents are divorced, my father is not really in the picture, I keep in touch with my mother on a daily basis and come visit her and the rest of the family once or twice a year. We never had the best relationship but since I moved out it improved a lot. I’d say we get along better when I’m far away from home.
Anyway, back to the reason of this post. I’ve been seeing this guy for more than a year, he’s great, we’re slowly getting to know each other and see where this is going. We are not in a rush but of course this is a relationship and I felt it was time to tell something more to my mother. I’ve always been quite open about my relationships and people I was dating, however since getting older I started being more private as I don’t think it would be good to mention every failed date to my mother (lol). We come from a typical small town in southern Europe, where people are bigots and close-minded. The news on the tv are constantly complaining about immigrants coming to our country and jadajadajada. The government is mostly right wing. So yeah, I didn’t really mentioned much about this guy, first of all cause I’m trying to keep it private but also because I could imagine her reaction, since she’s the standard average middle age woman that you find on Facebook without much culture. She is ignorant not as an insult but as in the real sense of the word: she ignores, she doesn’t inform herself and just believes whatever the media tells her.
Anyway, she suspected I was seeing someone for a while, I never really said much but I’ve been giving her a few hints in the past weeks and now that I came back to my hometown for a week she started being very curious. The day after I arrived we were casually talking before bed and she just kept asking “C’mon, don’t you have a pic of this guy? Show me! C’mon c’mon! I’m your mother!” so, one side of me didn’t wanna show her, the other one was excited cause at the end of the day I’m proud of my relationship and I was happy to tell her more (maybe naively hoping for a good outcome…). So without thinking much I showed her one of the best pictures of him. Literally in the millisecond while I was showing her the picture she said something like: “hope it’s not a n****” (WHATTT???).
At that point the phone was already on her face. It was done. She said it, and at the same time she saw the picture. She was speechless and I was too. I was ashamed of her. And sad.
She didn’t say anything more for the following 10 minutes, she went to her room and I went to mine. Afterwards she just asked “does he even work?!” And I told her “don’t worry about it, he’s better off than the both of us” just to make her shut up about that question that I found so disrespectful. This made me just so sad, and disappointed.
But the worst had yet to come. We didn’t speak much about it at all until today.
We were having a casual conversation during the afternoon when the relationship topic came out. In particular, we were talking about how your partner should improve your life and not making it worse, meaning he should make you happy, he should bring good positive vibes, get along etc. that’s what I was thinking and referring to. But she started being very materialistic, she asked me “so, in which way is he improving your life?!” in a very aggressive sassy tone “I don’t see anything changing“ she said. I was mentioning that he makes me happy when the conversation degenerated. All sort of things came out of it.
She started by saying:
“well, I truly hopes this will be just a friend and you will keep it like that”
then she continued with:
“please take birth control precautions before you regret it”
“don’t come to me later saying I didn’t stop you”
and the cherry on top was:
“I would have preferred if you told me you were a lesbian cause at least that is cool nowadays”.
I was speechless and I still am.
I asked her what is it that she doesn’t like and what is she basing her opinions on, since she literally knows nothing about him. She couldn’t answer. She kept repeating the same things over and over and she also said she would never want to meet him.
I have to mention that the few guys she met that I was dating were of different cultures, but she never had a problem with them, I guess because the skin color was the same… and in her mind there are probably foreigners of Class A, B, C…
I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but I neither expected such a bad reaction.
All this hurts me so much.
I don’t know what to do.
In my mind it neither makes sense cause she married an immigrant but it seems like she never really came to terms with it, she never really accepted it. For instance, I know nothing about my father’s culture, I never learned the language or interesting facts about it because nobody ever thought me anything about it. I only learned about my mother’s culture, the one of the country I lived in. And I always felt out of place because this country is extremely racist. The fact that my father was not a good husband or father has nothing to do with where he comes from. If a person is an idiot, is an idiot no matter what. And I told her this when we were talking. The fact that she had a bad experience doesn’t mean that I will, just because I’m seeing someone from a different culture. I also explained to her that I am myself an immigrant, since I’m living in another country. But it doesn’t seem to click in her head. And when I told her, to her face, that she is indeed racist, she obviously denied it, because how can she be racist if she married an immigrant herself?
And of course during today’s conversation there was some victim behavior on her side, because every time I come back here it’s certain that we are gonna fight and every time it happens I say stuff like “let’s see when and if I will come back again!”. So she was bringing that up cause the other day I said “the first racist comment I hear I’m gone”. She mentioned that, saying I don’t care about her, that she has to beg for me to call her (mind you, we write good morning, good night, text here and there during the day and we talk on the phone 3/4 times a week…). She even said that “she lost me already the moment I left”. Honestly, I don’t know what else more than this she expects from me if what I do is not enough already.
I don’t really know how to handle this. And I’m also just venting and need some support. I wished we could all act as adults, respect each other, have a normal relationship. Am I asking for too much?!
Any advice is highly appreciated.
I’ll be stuck in her house for the next two days and finally I’ll leave on Thursday. I want her to think about her actions and realize where she did wrong before I leave. I don’t wanna put this under the carpet cause it’s unacceptable.
TL;DR: my 25F mother 56F doesn’t approve of my boyfriend 28M just because of the color of his skin. Her opinion is based solely on a photo I showed her and at the same time she plays the victim and claims she lost me the moment I moved abroad and I don’t care about her even if we talk everyday. I wished there was a way to behave like adults. Advices on setting boundaries?
submitted by just_melancholia to narcissisticparents [link] [comments]
I moved away from home as soon as I could when I was 18 after a not so good childhood, and currently live in another European country. My parents are divorced, my father is not really in the picture, I keep in touch with my mother on a daily basis and come visit her and the rest of the family once or twice a year. We never had the best relationship but since I moved out it improved a lot. I’d say we get along better when I’m far away from home.
Anyway, back to the reason of this post. I’ve been seeing this guy for more than a year, he’s great, we’re slowly getting to know each other and see where this is going. We are not in a rush but of course this is a relationship and I felt it was time to tell something more to my mother. I’ve always been quite open about my relationships and people I was dating, however since getting older I started being more private as I don’t think it would be good to mention every failed date to my mother (lol). We come from a typical small town in southern Europe, where people are bigots and close-minded. The news on the tv are constantly complaining about immigrants coming to our country and jadajadajada. The government is mostly right wing. So yeah, I didn’t really mentioned much about this guy, first of all cause I’m trying to keep it private but also because I could imagine her reaction, since she’s the standard average middle age woman that you find on Facebook without much culture. She is ignorant not as an insult but as in the real sense of the word: she ignores, she doesn’t inform herself and just believes whatever the media tells her.
Anyway, she suspected I was seeing someone for a while, I never really said much but I’ve been giving her a few hints in the past weeks and now that I came back to my hometown for a week she started being very curious. The day after I arrived we were casually talking before bed and she just kept asking “C’mon, don’t you have a pic of this guy? Show me! C’mon c’mon! I’m your mother!” so, one side of me didn’t wanna show her, the other one was excited cause at the end of the day I’m proud of my relationship and I was happy to tell her more (maybe naively hoping for a good outcome…). So without thinking much I showed her one of the best pictures of him. Literally in the millisecond while I was showing her the picture she said something like: “hope it’s not a n****” (WHATTT???).
At that point the phone was already on her face. It was done. She said it, and at the same time she saw the picture. She was speechless and I was too. I was ashamed of her. And sad.
She didn’t say anything more for the following 10 minutes, she went to her room and I went to mine. Afterwards she just asked “does he even work?!” And I told her “don’t worry about it, he’s better off than the both of us” just to make her shut up about that question that I found so disrespectful. This made me just so sad, and disappointed.
But the worst had yet to come. We didn’t speak much about it at all until today.
We were having a casual conversation during the afternoon when the relationship topic came out. In particular, we were talking about how your partner should improve your life and not making it worse, meaning he should make you happy, he should bring good positive vibes, get along etc. that’s what I was thinking and referring to. But she started being very materialistic, she asked me “so, in which way is he improving your life?!” in a very aggressive sassy tone “I don’t see anything changing“ she said. I was mentioning that he makes me happy when the conversation degenerated. All sort of things came out of it.
She started by saying:
“well, I truly hopes this will be just a friend and you will keep it like that”
then she continued with:
“please take birth control precautions before you regret it”
“don’t come to me later saying I didn’t stop you”
and the cherry on top was:
“I would have preferred if you told me you were a lesbian cause at least that is cool nowadays”.
I was speechless and I still am.
I asked her what is it that she doesn’t like and what is she basing her opinions on, since she literally knows nothing about him. She couldn’t answer. She kept repeating the same things over and over and she also said she would never want to meet him.
I have to mention that the few guys she met that I was dating were of different cultures, but she never had a problem with them, I guess because the skin color was the same… and in her mind there are probably foreigners of Class A, B, C…
I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but I neither expected such a bad reaction.
All this hurts me so much.
I don’t know what to do.
In my mind it neither makes sense cause she married an immigrant but it seems like she never really came to terms with it, she never really accepted it. For instance, I know nothing about my father’s culture, I never learned the language or interesting facts about it because nobody ever thought me anything about it. I only learned about my mother’s culture, the one of the country I lived in. And I always felt out of place because this country is extremely racist. The fact that my father was not a good husband or father has nothing to do with where he comes from. If a person is an idiot, is an idiot no matter what. And I told her this when we were talking. The fact that she had a bad experience doesn’t mean that I will, just because I’m seeing someone from a different culture. I also explained to her that I am myself an immigrant, since I’m living in another country. But it doesn’t seem to click in her head. And when I told her, to her face, that she is indeed racist, she obviously denied it, because how can she be racist if she married an immigrant herself?
And of course during today’s conversation there was some victim behavior on her side, because every time I come back here it’s certain that we are gonna fight and every time it happens I say stuff like “let’s see when and if I will come back again!”. So she was bringing that up cause the other day I said “the first racist comment I hear I’m gone”. She mentioned that, saying I don’t care about her, that she has to beg for me to call her (mind you, we write good morning, good night, text here and there during the day and we talk on the phone 3/4 times a week…). She even said that “she lost me already the moment I left”. Honestly, I don’t know what else more than this she expects from me if what I do is not enough already.
I don’t really know how to handle this. And I’m also just venting and need some support. I wished we could all act as adults, respect each other, have a normal relationship. Am I asking for too much?!
Any advice is highly appreciated.
I’ll be stuck in her house for the next two days and finally I’ll leave on Thursday. I want her to think about her actions and realize where she did wrong before I leave. I don’t wanna put this under the carpet cause it’s unacceptable.
TL;DR: my 25F mother 56F doesn’t approve of my boyfriend 28M just because of the color of his skin. Her opinion is based solely on a photo I showed her and at the same time she plays the victim and claims she lost me the moment I moved abroad and I don’t care about her even if we talk everyday. I wished there was a way to behave like adults. Advices on setting boundaries?
2024.05.14 08:03 CulpableSnail It's odd but is it a scam?
Hi all, bit of an odd one.
I'm selling an expensive bit of kit (value citlrca £5K) via some specialist Facebook groups here in the UK. I have a buyer from an EU country, he's asked all the right questions, requested the right videos/checks etc.
He's flying into the UK, getting a train to my town, with a view to buying. He's sent me a pic of his ID, and I have seen the public details of his company where he is pictured. His Facebook profile also appears genuine.
The only oddity, if it is one, is he will come with a female friend who now lives in the UK and she will bank transfer the funds to me there and then if sale agreed. We did talk of an international bank transfer but that would take 5 days and I get not paying a huge sum in advance.
Is there a scam here? I can't see one and no alarm bells are ringing for me, it just feels odd.
submitted by CulpableSnail to Scams [link] [comments]
I'm selling an expensive bit of kit (value citlrca £5K) via some specialist Facebook groups here in the UK. I have a buyer from an EU country, he's asked all the right questions, requested the right videos/checks etc.
He's flying into the UK, getting a train to my town, with a view to buying. He's sent me a pic of his ID, and I have seen the public details of his company where he is pictured. His Facebook profile also appears genuine.
The only oddity, if it is one, is he will come with a female friend who now lives in the UK and she will bank transfer the funds to me there and then if sale agreed. We did talk of an international bank transfer but that would take 5 days and I get not paying a huge sum in advance.
Is there a scam here? I can't see one and no alarm bells are ringing for me, it just feels odd.