Hi! dont know anyone else in my life that has experienced keloid removal but im on my third one now its actually the same spot of my first keloid removal where it came back very very badly. I will try to sum up my experience with keloid removal: so basically first attempt on my right upper ear where i previously had an industrial piercing i developed a very large keloid on the front and back of my upper ear i opted to get injections but decided to do removal since i wanted it done and over with. my doctors encouraged me to wear pressure earrings but the ones i got were too tight and tore away at my ears and created a hole through my ear and i got MRSA i eventually got it cleared up and it healed but obviously the keloid came back bigger than before. second keloid removal was on my left upper ear where i had a helix piercing and the keloid was pretty big on the back of the ear but smaller on the front side they decided to do the exact same method but i got a different kind of pressure earring which the nurse didnt correctly put on and it fell off as soon as i sat up after the procedure and i just never put it back on and this ear healed much better and the keloid hasnt come back at all. i did still get MRSA and had to be put on iv antibiotics for 2 days but besides that i was fine. both instances i was in immense pain where i felt like i was being stabbed through my ear constantly and was sobbing from pain and i feel like i have a pretty good pain tolerance? they refused to prescribe me anything but tylenol until i went to the urgent care for the iv antibiotics and they finally gave me a stronger painkiller. today for my third procedure they decided to do the same method with the screw on pressure earring but for some reason this time i was nonstop bleeding for 5 hours after and i had to go back in and have them numb me and cauterize the wound more. they still only prescribe me tylenol even though i told them that i was again in a ton of pain. i dont know id its normal for me to be in this much pain? since they dont want to offer me anything that will help the pain more. I dont have a history of drug abuse so im not sure why they arent really taking it seriously? maybe im the only one who experiences pain from this procedure? please let me know if anyone else has any complications when they get their removal done!

26F Diagnosed with IBS, GERD, and POTS. I currently take Lansoprazole, Metoprolol, Hailey 24Fe (birth control), and Vyvanse.
Ever since I was around 19-20 years old, my weight would change pretty drastically from year to year. I did swim and track in high school and I worked out consistently throughout college (aerial silks, weights, and yoga). I started college at around 115lbs (for reference I’m 5’3). By sophomore year, I was almost 130lbs. I thought, freshman 15, it happens to a lot of people, and I adjusted my eating habits to be less junk / fast food. By junior year, I was about 112lbs. Senior year, I was 120lbs give or take. I never really TRIED to gain or lose weight.
Surprisingly, I stayed at 120lbs throughout covid/lockdown despite no longer working out. Around mid-2021, I started to not be able to keep down food, throwing up most of my meals, feeling full all the time, and I lost weight very quickly, I was down to 100lbs in three months. Obviously, I was concerned and went to the doctor and they first did a pregnancy test (negative), then bloodwork. Everything came back normal except my T3/T4 (can’t remember exactly) showed a slight hyperthyroidism. I was sent to an endocrinologist who ran another pregnancy test (negative) and more bloodwork, she said everything was fine and normal. My primary doctor was having me drink protein smoothies instead of eating meals and taking prenatal vitamins to make sure I was getting enough nutrients in the mean time, and that kept me stable at 100lbs. Still, most of the time I felt full no matter if I had eaten or not and I would throw up most solid food.
Since I had just started a new bipolar medication (Latuda) right before the vomiting started, my psych took me off that (didn’t help) and put me on Abilify instead (which I ended up switching from a few months later to Lamotrigine because it gave me tardive dyskinesia). I also took a break from my birth control for most of 2022 to see if that effecting my hormones was causing it (no, it wasn’t).
It was around SeptembeOctober of 2021 that I experienced my first POTS fainting episode. We didn’t know what was happening so my boyfriend brought me to the ER, but by the time I got there I was already recovering from it so the doctors there didn’t take me seriously, especially since COVID was still big. I would have a few more fainting spells and then an abnormal EKG from an urgent care in October 2022 before I was diagnosed with POTS by a cardiologist.
During that time in mid to late 2022, I also had a vaginal ultrasound done (check for ovarian or uterine cancer / cysts; none, ovaries multi-follicular); a regular ultrasound to check my pancreas, kidneys, liver, etc. (family history of pancreatic cancer; all clear and normal); and an endoscopy/colonoscopy (signs of slight inflammation; diagnosed with IBS and GERD). After the IBS/GERD diagnosis, I was put on the lansoprazole, which did help a lot and got me back up to 120lbs by 2023. Once I had the IBS/GERD and POTS diagnoses, my primary doctor basically said, “We don’t know what’s causing them, so we’re just going to treat those symptoms for now.”
Now it’s 2024 and in the past 4 months I’ve now GAINED almost 20 lbs despite still eating less than I did before I started not being able to eat in 2021 and with almost no change to my diet otherwise beyond adding extra salt to help with the POTS symptoms, and I’ve actually been MORE active lately by trying to take my dogs on walks around our neighborhood (dependent on how bad POTS is that day).
Other symptoms I experience are migraines, fatigue, joint pain (particularly in my neck, back, and fingers), and brain fog. Also have family history of hypothyroidism and hydrocephalus.
Whenever I try to search about drastic fluctuations in weight, the results are all about the normal daily fluctuations people have, which makes me think that drastically losing 20lbs in 3 months without trying, slowly gaining it back over a year, and then suddenly gaining 20lbs in 3 months without trying over the span of a couple years isn’t something that typically happens to people. So doctors of Reddit, what do you think could cause it?

I’m going to try and not give too many personal/family details for the sake of my families privacy but one of my parents has started having siezure and it has been so hard to get answers.. Let’s call this parent Riley. Riley started having seizure’s that ONLY happened when they first woke up/within an hour after waking. They would be fully unaware during them but would walk around, stomp their feet, yell if someone tried to prevent them from walking, and would moan and scream for help. It’s terrifying to witness someone seem fully aware and in pain but has zero recollection after it’s over. Anyway, Riley’s doctor eventually got them on a medication after a couple brain scans seemed to look normal, and than, this doctor moved away and Riley still has seizure’s, the medication has only made them farther apart (idk if this is common but they are always exactly the same amount of months apart). So, still seizure’s, no doctor, and while Riley is able to bounce back faster after having one and has less of them, there’s been some new issues that are really scary. First off, Riley has horrible memory, they constantly immediately forget what you told them, they forget who’s home and where people are, they get agitated about how long you haven’t been home because their perception of time seems off. On top of this, they are having focal aware seizure’s now, sometimes right before a full on seizure where they lose consciousness and other times it passes in a couple minutes and they’re fine. Now, we’re wondering if all these years we thought Riley was having bizarre panic attacks and diagnosed with panic disorder, they’ve actually been having focal aware seizure’s because they look identical and during these “panic attacks” they cannot speak at all. They also sometimes get paranoia during it where they think someone is coming after them and it was simply diagnosed as PTSD. I’m scared because my parent clearly has declining health issues now and Canada sucks because they let you have no doctor and don’t seem to care about what’s actually causing these issues to begin with. I guess I’m just looking for someone to tell me if they know from personal experience what they could be dealing with or how to advocate for them and get the testing they need to rule out all possible causes of these seizures. The only tests they’ve had was a couple EEGs. This has been so scary to deal with this, and has greatly affected their quality of life :(

Backstory: I’m a 30 year old and I’ve struggled with heavy, clotty, and very painful periods for a few years now (worsened after having kids). I was recently diagnosed with adenomyosis after going to the ER for a huge blood clot and extra heavy bleeding. I was done with my uterus since I already have 2 babies and I wanted to be done with my horrible periods. I went in for my consultation and had a surgery date within a month or so.
Surgery day was smooth and I stayed the night in the hospital for 1 night. I had my family stay at our house in little 3-4 day increments for the first 2 weeks to help with my 18 month old and 3 year old during the day while my husband worked. Then after the first two weeks my husband worked shorter hours and ran up and down the stairs to help lift our son in and out of the highchair constantly etc.
My recovery went really well! I had a total laproscopic hysterectomy and kept my ovaries. The gas pains right after surgery were the worst part of recovery by far for me. I tried to walk around and move and keep trying to pass gas and eat things that were easy to digest. I also focused on eating nutritious and very fibrous foods to heal. I drank a protein shake every day and made smoothies and ate applesauce pouches with lots of veggies etc. I also took miralax for the week before surgery through the first 2 weeks. I was only on narcotic pain meds for about 3 days, on big girl ibuprofen for maybe 3 more days after that. I felt mostly normal by 2-3 weeks post op except for the fatigue. I was really good about not lifting anything for the 6 weeks (and had lots of help from my family and husband thank goodness).
I just had my 6 week appt and she said my vaginal cuff is healed and only have about a 1/2 inch spot on it that is still red and raw looking but that I was cleared for lifting and sexual activity. I am now lifting my toddlers and feeling like myself again (minus the uterine pain yay!). My husband and I finally had sex and it went super well! We used lots of lubrication and took our time getting warmed up and it didn’t hurt at all! I was so relieved!!
Just wanted to share my positive experience for anyone who was scared to get the surgery done. I know I was super lucky to receive so much help from my village and that’s a big part of why I was able to take the time to really heal well. I was super nervous and hesitant to do it, but I am SO GLAD that I got the surgery done! It was easier on my body than my 2 vaginal births IMO. Good luck out there y’all! ❤️

Without going into too much detail based off childhood experiences, I definitely ended up caring too much about what others think of me or perceive of me. I lack self confidence and esteem admittedly. I knew I was a boy ever since I could remember during childhood and everyone thought it was just a phase and me being a tomboy. I somewhat normalized to my assigned gender halfway through middle school to end of junior year in high school. It never felt right and I was often uncomfortable with myself. I even forced myself to wear dresses and I just couldn’t feel good about it. I would get extremely offended by sexist comments, whether it be in movies or in real life.
I realized the summer of my junior year in high school after taking a creative writing and media studies class that I actually was a guy inside this whole time. I was so scared to tell my mom that I wrote it on flash card. I’ve never felt a pain like I did that summer. I literally locked myself in the bathroom for hours on end just hating my body, and not once did my parents take me in to start transitioning. I was very close to being suicidal. I feel like if I just asked to be taken in then transitioning would have been so much easier. Now here I am a decade later and very fearful of my parents seeing the physical changes. I feel like a coward that I care so much what they think. My dad is extremely judgmental and anything he doesn’t agree with he can get angry and almost belligerent. He isn’t outwardly transphobic but seems to not acknowledge me as a guy. He basically called me fat recently to give an example of him being judgmental.
I feel so angry at my parents in all honesty. Angry that I’ve let myself down for this long in fear of what others would think of me. I’m just so anxious and I feel myself trying to convince myself to not go through with this. It’s a constant wavering of am I doing this or not. It’s exhausting.
Tldr; Very scared to start T in fear of others reactions to me, especially my parents. I don’t know how to quell the anxiety but I’ve sacrificed my authentic self for people pleasing long enough

• 22 years old • 20 Weeks pregnant • 127 pounds Has any other pregnant mamas experienced bone pain during pregnancy? My OB says I am extremely dehydrated. Google says dehydration can cause bone pain. Anyone else have this?

• 22 years old • 20 Weeks pregnant • 127 pounds Has any other pregnant mamas experienced bone pain during pregnancy? My OB says I am extremely dehydrated. Google says dehydration can cause bone pain. Anyone else have this?

• 22 years old • 20 Weeks pregnant • 127 pounds Has any other pregnant mamas experienced bone pain during pregnancy? My OB says I am extremely dehydrated. Google says dehydration can cause bone pain. Anyone else have this?

Did anyone develop gastritis after norovirus? I recovered from c diff then was hit with norovirus. Had an upper endoscopy today and it showed gastritis. Doc didn’t script any meds just told me to follow a certain diet for a few and lower my stress.
Can gastritis go away with diet changes? I have only been able to do liquids from 5/3 to today. Slowly getting my appetite back and the pain is not as intense. During noro it felt like contractions in my stomach and I threw up constantly, especially in the morning.
I am taking florastor and eating dairy free yogurt.

Hi all, I am 35F, overweight, asian, I used to smoke a lot and have family history of cancer. I have been having a lot of symptoms the past months. Extreme fatigue in the afternoon I can barely talk sometimes, I'm just tired, severe pain during my period.
Last weekend, I had a severe sciatica pain during my period. Pain from right side of my buttocks down right side of my leg. I couldn’t walk for 3 days the pain was so intense. I used to have this similar pain but last weekend was the worst I had to go to ER but they sent me home with some pain medications.
3 months ago, I had my Transvaginal Ultrasound because of my irregular periods and period pain.
The result is: There is an indeterminate right adnexal lesion with prominent vascularity measuring 14 × 11 x 12 mm Haematoma or dermoid ovary. An ectopic pregnancy is thought to be unlikely. Correlation with beta hCG and gynaecological review is recommended.
For some personal and financial reasons I kept postponing my follow-up check up. I was also thinking its not serious because my OB Gyne’s clinic did not mark my followup appointment as urgent.
My question is, what does my ultrasound say? Is it possible that the lesion is malignant even if its small? Is this related to my symptoms? Thank you in advance. :)

This is my second pregnancy-I definitely feel more wear on my body this time around, mostly because I’m chasing a toddler around all day and I really barely get the chance to sit down during the day. I’m currently 29 weeks, I’m on vacation this week, so walking constantly and barely off my feet. I of course notice swollen feet by the end of the day. However, I notice that the left side is super swollen and the right side isn’t so bad. It’s not painful, just swollen and of course my legs and feet just feel worn and tired overall after a day of activities. I’m super vigilant and nervous over preeclampsia as I am considered overweight during pregnancy and I know I am predisposed. Aside from this swelling I have no other symptoms-has anyone else experienced swelling in only one foot?

22F. Seeing another neurologist and getting an EMG in three weeks but would like to get other people’s opinions - my PCP has no idea what’s going on with me. What am I missing/where do I go from here?
Current symptoms: - perceived weakness and neuropathy in left hand/wrist (feels like a weird burning/tingling sensation, sometimes triggered by the cold but present a majority of the time) - this is by far my worst symptom - occasional tingling sensations in other extremities, but never as frequent as left hand - bad upper back pain (comes and goes, gets worse with certain positions and never in one specific area) - derealization/brain fog (feels like I’m out of it/in a different universe, also hard to describe) - occasional chills/shivering - fatigue (sort of comes and goes in waves)
Timeline of my symptoms:
Feb 2023: fell twice while drunk (don’t have balance issues), woke up a two days later with terrible back spasms. A few days after that I noticed weird tingling sensations in my hands and feet and freaked out, also generally not feeling well/having a lot of fatigue. Freaked out about having MS - doctor did brain MRI and told me to chill out, symptoms went away.
Sept 2023: started experiencing chronic fatigue and derealization, chalked it up to weed withdrawals (I was cutting back at the time).
Oct 2023: got Covid - brain fog and fatigue got a lot worse.
Late Oct 2023: started having weird stomach issues - constant bloating and random sharp pains in lower abdomen. Got some tests done, this went away in around a month.
Early Nov 2023: started getting vaginal pain/constant burning sensation. Got more tests done, also went away in around a month.
Dec 2023: started feeling a bit better, then had a terrifying experience on THC (fully disassociated and thought I was dying multiple times), quit for good.
Mid Dec 2023: started talking birth control for PCOS as per gyno’s recommendation.
Late Dec 2023: started getting weird muscle weakness in both left hand and foot, went away in around three weeks. Also felt chest pain a few times and ended up in the ER for it, where I got my heart tested. Fatigue was pretty bad this whole time.
Jan-Feb 2024: muscle weakness mostly gone, fatigue slowly improving throughout these months, still dealing with some brain fog. Resumed weed use which was probably a bad idea.
March-May 2024: Quit weed for good. Switched to new progestin-only birth control because the combination one was giving me high BP. Started getting all this weird neuropathy and joint pain all over the place, for a few days it was super bad in my left/hand wrist and since then it’s been mostly in that area. Makes me wonder whether I have carpal tunnel or some nerve compression problem - it’s pretty painful. Sometimes shows up in left foot but not that bad there. Still have some derealization and brain fog that shows up for a few hours a day - it’s weird. Fatigue and back pain still present. Symptoms come and go in ways though - I have both good and bad days. I’d like to think I’m improving overall, but days like today make me not so sure of that.
Medical history: - had spinal fusion surgery for scoliosis in thoracic spine when I was 15 - PCOS - no family history of any autoimmune or neurological conditions except for grandmother with MS
Medications/drugs: - take 2,000 IU of vitamin D3 every day - started birth control in December (right before the neuropathy started - wonder if they might be related?) - chronic daily THC abuse for ~14 months right before all this started, been sober for several months now (possibly related?)
Tests I’ve already had: - brain MRI in Feb 2023 and March 2024 - both showed unchanged one/possibly two nonspecific T2 hyperintensities that the MS specialist said were benign - cervical spine MRI - 100% clear - neurological exams (multiple) - 100% normal - full abdominal and pelvic ultrasound - clear except for benign liver finding that doctor is not concerned about - chest x-ray - 100% clear - two EKGs - normal - thoracic spine x-ray - clear, showed that screws from surgery are in proper place - stool test - normal - urine test - normal - pap smear - atypical cells of undetermined significance, HPV negative - doctor said not to worry about it/continue screening every three years - lyme disease test - initial screening came back positive but confirmation tests were negative so doctors concluded it wasn’t lyme - B12 test - 526 (normal) - A1C - 4.8 (normal) - Rheumatoid factor - normal - C-reactive protein - normal/on lower side - ESR - normal/on lower side - SPEP panel with immunofixation - all normal - Jo-1 antibody - normal - CBC and complete metabolic panel - all normal - hepatic panel - normal - Methylmalonic acid - normal - TSH with reflex - normal - troponin - normal - PT-INR - normal - magnesium - normal - lipase - normal - serum protein electrophoresis - normal - mono (multiple times) - negative - reproductive hormones - elevated androgens (hence the PCOS diagnosis)

TODAY'S RECAP

I was so bored with the show today. Liam gets all up in Deacon's business. Luna worries she's pregnant. RJ fusses at Brooke for fussing at Zende. Even Steffy's confrontation with Sheila bored me bc it was so very predictable. Knowing the topics, someone could write a recap without even viewing the episode.

RJ, Brooke, and Ridge at FC

RJ: MOMMMM! You shouldn't have fussed at Zende! 🤨 It's Luna's business. I want to respect her privacy. So, please stay out of it! 😦 I'm handling it. Gah! I don't need your help!
Brooke: I had to! 😦
RJ: No. No you did NOT have to! (💭 Don't make me regret telling you.😕)
Brooke: We're FAMILY! He slept with your girlfriend! 👩I had to know what he would say for himself (💭 🫤 Not much.)
RJ: Nuh uh! You did not HAVE to know ANYTHING! (💭 Getting mom to back off is not easy. Why does she have to know everything? 🫤)
I'ma draw a circle ⭕ around MY business and Luna's. That's called a BOUNDARY. This is you right here 👇 in the middle of OUR business. You need to get 👉 👉 👉 OUT. (💭 Okay, Reddit. That's what we wished he would have said 🫤.)
(What he really said, in the nicest way possible) Mommmmm. Don't do that. We need to respect Luna's privacy. I don't want you talking about it here or with dad.
Enter Ridge. 😀 What's going on? Something's up. What is it? 🧐 It's totally my business. Everything is. I get to butt in. That's my thing.
RJ: 🫤
Brooke: 🙄
Ridge: It's Luna right? 😀 Great gal! Office romance, huh. 👩‍❤️‍👨 I did that. I fell for this hot chemist 🔬😍. (Smoochy Smoochy 😘.)
RJ: (💭 Not your business 😒). Dad, it's not a BIG life or death thing, so can you just be cool with not knowing? 😐
Ridge: Nooo. Now I REALLY want to know!
RJ: It doesn't involve you two and it's not life or death, so. (💭 These two! Gah!)
Ridge: Ohhhh, I see. You're acting like a teenager, going to your mom for help.
Brooke: He's not in any kind of trouble 😐. (💭 Getting Ridge to back off is not easy. Why does he have to know everything? 🫤)
Ridge: Alright. Look, your mom gives great advice. Listen to her! 😀 I'm here too if you want to talk. (Redditors who are not fast forwarding are surprised he's letting it go. It's so un-Ridge.)
You're doing so great! 😀 HFTF👗is great! 😃 You have a great team 🙂 and that ain't easy! Your collaboration is great! 😊 It's all great! 😀 Everyone else thinks you're great too! 😃 And you and Luna are great! 👩‍❤️‍👨 Keep up the great! 😁
RJ: With Hope's vision, anyone coul--
Ridge: Nah. Not anyone. You're GREAT!

Luna and Poppy at FC

Luna: Ohhhhhhhh noooooooo.😟 I think I might be pregnant.🤰I have this pregnancy test, but I think instead of taking it, we should just speculate back and forth.
Poppy and Luna: (play 20 questions❓) We know you had sex❓ Yah 😟. With two guys❓Yah 😣. Did you use protection❓Yah 😢. Do you feel sick❓🤢 Yah yah yah! 🤢🤮 Have you ever felt like this before❓Noooooooooooooooo! 😩 It's a special, unique, new kinda sick! 😖
Luna: I don't want to mess up my life! 😫 What am I gonna doooooooo?! RJ just forgave me 😫.
Poppy: Oh! YAY! 😃👏👏👏 Told you so 😏.
Luna: I don't wanna baby! 👶🍼 Wah! 😩
Poppy: (💭 Yah. Obviously sweetheart. You might think you're grown, but you're still a BABY! And kind of a big baby 🫤.) Don't get ahead of yourself. It could be something else. 🙄
Luna: Yah! 🙄 But nah 😞. Maybe I should just take the test? (💭 🤔)
Poppy: Yah. 😐
(⏰ Alarm rings.)
Luna: 😫 I can't loooooook! 🫣 You loooooooook!
Poppy: 👀
Luna: 😟

Deacon and Liam at Il Giardino

Liam: Wtf are you doing? 🤨
Deacon: Working. Living my life. Saving Sheila. 😏
Liam: (💭 I'ma jump right into his business bc we used to hang out back when I was married to his daughter.) No one but you is happy Sheila's alive. 😒
Deacon: (💭 Dude. How is this your business? 🤔) I'm thrilled 😃 she's alive and so is Finn! 👨‍⚕️
Liam: 🤨 Ohhh, hey, that Finn part, that won't work for Steffy 😡.
Deacon: You want me to wish someone dead? 💀 Nah.
Liam: Wellll, no but you've invented an imaginary version of Sheila! 😇 Sheila BAD! 👺 She did all the very bad 😈 things. Don't you get that? Amirite?
Deacon: But not ONLY the bad things. Also a good thing - tryna save Steffy.🦸‍♀️
Liam: But the bad is very BAD 👹. And how do you know she tried to save Steffy? 🤔 You have only her word! She could be making shit up 🫲 left and right 🫱! She could be spinning stories ✍️, telling tall tales, presenting you with her fantasy 🧙🪄 fiction, exaggerating 😦, LYING!
Deacon: Or not. Look, I'm happy she's alive! And I didn't listen to anybody. If I hadn't searched texts📱, credit card 💳 receipts 🧾, and if Finn and I hadn't tracked her down and saved her from being chained up ⛓️ in that warehouse, she really would be dead ☠️😵.
Liam: Yay Columbo. 🔎 But what about STEFFY? I'm concerned about STEFFY! I have STEFFY on the brain! Finn can't protect STEFFY (💭 so I will!)
Deacon: Steffy is fine. Gah. I know Sheila's psycho 😵‍💫 history (💭🪓➰🔪🔥). And she knows I'm not a big fan of the attempted murders and shit. I was like, babe. Stop. 🛑 Not cool. And she was like, for you and my son, okaaaay, fine, I'll stop. ppffrrtt. Sheesh. 🙄
So yah, she's changed. She hasn't sprouted angel 😇 wings 🪽 but she's no threat. And Steffy can be relieved that Steffy The Blade Forrester 😏 didn't kill 🔪 Finn's birth mother.
Liam: Not funny. 🤨 All Steffy wants is NO Sheila in their lives. So maybe you and Finn could at least lay off the happy dance!🕺🕺
Deacon: Steffy could choose to be open minded and at least give Sheila a chance.
Liam: Nah! 🤨
Deacon: I'm in a happy dance🕺, cartwheel🤸‍♂️, spike the ball 🏈 in the end zone kinda mood. So's Finn. 😃
Liam: 😒

Steffy and Sheila at Deacon's apartment

(Sheila flashes back to Deacon's latest proposal. Steffy knocks, then walks in).
Steffy: YOUUUUUU! 😡😤 Alive and well! Blech! 🤮
Sheila: Hiyeee.👋 I realize that you hate me, that you don't want to see my face, that you wish I were dead 💀, that all you can think about is the list of my violent 🪓➰🔪crimes against your family, but heyyyy. Let's chat. Why not? 🫲☺️🫱. I've been wanting to talk to you.
Steffy: Grrr! Snort! 😤
I hope you can at least understand Finn's feelings. He's jumping for joy 🤸‍♂️that I'm alive.
Steffy: 😡
Sheila: You too can feel the same if you just give a girl a chance, will ya? We can get our nails done 💅 and our hair cut 💇‍♀️💇‍♀️ together! I can be your BFF 👯, if you'll just overlook several instances of attempted murder 🪓, kidnapping ➰, arson 🔥, and what not. I'm all better 😇 now for real for real. I'm taking all soft and smooth and not choking 😵 you even a little. So, what'd ya say?
Steffy: Grrr! Snarl! Finn's emotions are all SCREWY, SCRAMBLED up, and FRIED by YOU! 🫨 He's essentially got fried egg 🍳brain! Huff! Puff! 😤
He's GOOD! 👼 He's a doctor!👨‍⚕️ He's saves people! That's his job! He NEEDS--
Sheila: Your support! Your understanding. (💭Your personality to be swapped out. 😒). He just needs a little--
Steffy: FINN NEEDS YOU 👉 and YOUR CRAZY ASS PSYCHO 🫨 BULLSHIT to STAY🫸 the iFUCK AWAY FROM HIM! 🤬 STAY OUT of our lives! Snarl! 😡
Sheila: (💭 This again. Reminds me of the time I shot 🔫🩸 this bitch. 🫤) I gave BIRTH to him. I--
Steffy: I! DON'T! CARE! 😤😡🤨 I DON'T CARE that YOU GAVE BIRTH to HIM! SOOOO FUCKING WHAT?! That means exactly NOTHING to ME! Grrrr! Growl! This stupid ass CONNECTION IS DONE! FINISHED! OVER! Got it BITCH? 😤🤨😡
Sheila: I'm his mother. You're a mother--
Steffy: DON'T TRY TO PLAY THE MOMMY CARD! YOU SHOT HIM!
Sheila: Well yah (💭 I was tryna shoot you). But that was 🫲 then. This 🫱 is now. Finn forgave me. ☺️ He's--
Steffy: HE'S kind and compassionate, unlike YOU! All you bring is LIES! MISERY! HEARTACHE! 💔 DESTRUCTION! 💥 TSUNAMI! 🌊 TORNADOS! 🌪️ And POOR WAIT STAFF CUSTOMER SERVICE! We could get pizza 🍕 again at the ONLY PIZZA PLACE IN LA! But you've DESTROYED our pizza outings that we just got back! We were FINALLY READY to venture into Il Giardino again. Now you've RUINED IT FOR MY FAMILY! ROARRRRRR!
Sheila: Well yah and I wanna change that. I have a new beginning. We can try different pizza toppings -- whatever you want!
Steffy: OHHHHHHH STFU about FRESH STARTS and FRESH IDEAS for TOPPINGS! I will NEVER try CHOCOLATE 🍫 or COCONUT 🥥 on MY PIZZA! It's just WRONG! Snarl! Snort! 😤 Grrr! 😡 Harumph! YOU run your STUPID, UGLY, BIG, FAT, STINKING MOUTH 👄 about FRESH STARTS every fucking time you pop back from the DEAD 💀 like a FUCKING ZOMBIE 🧟‍♀️or get released from prison!
STOP 🛑 STOP 🛑 STOP 🛑 STOP 🛑 with your FRESH START and your TWISTED BIOLOGICAL tie to FINN! It STOPS 🛑 TODAY! Right FUCKING NOW!
Sheila: Sputter. Ppffrrtt! Well. Gah! (💭 Little girl, aren't you the bratty, bossy bitch. Hmm. What to do about you. I'm not supposed to kill 🔪 you, dang it 🫤. Finn would prolly be mad 😠 and Deacon would scold me 🤨 and hafta bribe another judge. 👨‍⚖️ Phewy. 😕 Kidnapping ➰ is always an option, as long as they don't trace it back to me 😏. She's such a pain in my ass 🫤. I'll try to reason with her, but she's not exactly reasonable. Reformed me is an expert on reasonableness 😌.)
You're forgetting Finn saved me. He missed me and that changed him. He--
Steffy: He's DECENT! He's a DOCTOR. You ALWAYS SPEW the SAME STUPID INSANE GARBAGE. 🤮 Grrr! I gave FINN a CHOICE -- YOU or ME! He chose ME! And his SON! NOT YOU! WE are his PRIORITY! Harumph!
Sheila: Yah yah, as you should be, but he's made room in his heart ❤️ for me too. Why can't he have both? 😦
Steffy: NEVER! YOU are DEAD 💀to us. YOU don't MATTER. I don't care about you or what you do with your PATHETIC useless, pointless life. Growl! 😡
You are CANCELLED! ❌ I'm BLOCKING YOU ON INSTA and FACEBOOK! YOU OBSESSIVELY LIKE EVERY PICTURE! IT'S CREEPY AF! DO NOT try to sneakily FRIEND FINN on SNAPCHAT either! 😡 Huff! Puff! 😤 Or send him encrypted messages! And he's not even on Reddit bc he thought he was spending too much time looking at funny cats 🐱 swatting things! 😡 WE will NOT follow YOU on TIKTOK and YOU can't even DANCE💃 like a normal person! Your moves are demented 🫨! And your stories are LAME af! FUCK right tf OFF!
Sheila: But I'm MOMMY. I care about him and he--
Steffy: IF YOU actually CARED about FINN, you would LEAVE him tf ALONE! DON'T try to worm 🪱 your way into his heart! 😡
Go do whatever the fuck with Deacon. But STAY OUT OF FINN'S HEAD! 🧠 STOP 🛑 MESSING with his EMOTIONS! Snarl! 😠 FUCK OFF! WREAK your fucked up brand of havoc AWAY FROM US BITCH! Snort! 😤 YOU DON'T EXIST TO US!
If you don't, YOU WILL ANSWER TO ME! 😡
Sheila: 😐 (💭 Clearly, she's a problem 😕.)
Steffy: 😡😡😡 (💭 watching 👁️👁️ you).
The end.

I need help. I cannot live like this anymore. And I’m getting nowhere with my doctors.
I have PCOS and have had abnormal but still “normal” cycles for about 15 years, I’m 40 now. But about 4 or 5 years ago, that changed. My periods started getting so unbelievably painful. Like lie in the shower crying painful. Sex started to get painful. I started getting a UTI before my period about 80% of the time. Bloating was awful. I went to my gyno at the time and she said it’s probably endo, but laparoscopy was pointless because I hadn’t had kids yet so they wouldn’t do surgery. She offered me birth control which I can’t take because I have really bad migraines with aura. So she offered me metformin which I declined.
Fast forward to now and my quality of life is honestly shit. I went to urgent care in January because my left lower abdominal pain was so excruciating that my husband wouldn’t hear otherwise. They took an xray and a basic blood panel, told me I was constipated and sent me home.
I came back a week later and saw my PCP’s NP who sent me for CT. CT showed a mass on my left ovary so they sent me for TVUS which showed…. Cysts on my right ovary. Make that make sense. So they sent me to a new gyno who ordered another US which showed potential uterine polyps. So I had sonohysterogram which showed nothing.
My gyno is now telling me there’s nothing wrong with me, that I’m fine and should just consider birth control. Again, I can’t take that. And through all of this, my period has just stopped entirely. It’s been 87 days since my last period and I just turned 40. I reminded her I have all the symptoms of endo and I’m ready to move forward with lap, surgery, removal, everything. She said she thinks I should just go back to my PCP.
I seriously need to know wtf to do. I’m afraid to leave my house because the pain gets so awful AND I’m afraid I’m going to just start violently bleeding. The only thing helping me right now is my heating pad and snuggles from my dogs. I’m crying daily. I can’t live like this but I can’t get anyone to HELP ME!!

I'm feeling quite down and sick of rejection. I don't understand why I'm having so much trouble finding a proper woman. I'm a gentleman, a ladies man. I conduct myself properly, I obey the law, I have NO criminal record. I'm a successful and accomplished chef in my field. I'm a good and kind person. Yet, my most recent love interest rejected me and then had the nerve to ask to "still be friends" Do people not understand that reciprocation works both in the positive sense as well as the negative sense? I rejected being their friend because I refuse to waste time or resources on someone who isn't worth it. What exactly is wrong with the dating pool these days? I mean I know I listed things that went wrong with it during the Yandere research project at some point. Yet, to be on the receiving end of that rejection and experience it has left me quite sad and I am left to collect my thoughts, reflect on this, and just do better.
It feels heartwrenching and painful to experience that rejection. I mean I'm even saving up money for property like an apartment and a mortgage and things are really bad now economically with inflation but it's still a life goal of mine to settle down and raise a family with the right woman. Why are things so difficult for all of us? It shouldn't be this hard just to find love. This has me thinking things these days are far worse than my findings had pointed to. It also has me thinking I should get on to finishing the last phase of the Yandere research project which is mass distribution and download of the information. I'm still very busy. I'll see about getting that done in the next week or two as I have time. Right now, I'm going to sip some wine and listen to some sad piano music.
I hope you're all well. I'd have to say it's far more difficult being a male these days than female.
I must reflect upon this and then I suppose I'll move on to finding the next darling or bumping into her naturally. Although my sense of direction isn't that great. So I suppose a "skill issue" meme related comment is appropriate here lol. I'll just put myself out there and keep going at it till I strike gold.

I kicked a ratchet trying to get a stuck oil drain plug off back on November 3rd. It's been one long nightmare since then. Incapacitating pain on the lateral side of that foot - figured I might have fractured the 5th metatarsal. Problem is that I had been having periodic chronic pain that I was sure was peroneal tendonitis, since it ran right along where that problem happens. Limped around for months - x-rays didn't show anything. Limped around more - wasn't getting better. On April 8th, was climbing down a steep hill when something went wrong and I was hit with a sudden sharp severe pain around the ankle in that area on the lateral side. Swelling all around the whole ankle and even down on top the whole foot. Finally went for an MRI of the foot and a separate one for the ankle. Foot came back ok no mention of any ligament or tendon or bone problems. That puzzled me. But what really blew me away was that the radiologist said it looked like a stress fracture of the calcaneus. Huh? I can put my full weight on my heel and the pain was always only ever with weight on the forefoot during push-off. Anyway, now it hurts all the time. Even just sitting here I am getting waves of pain. Right under the base of the 5th metatarsal where I hit that ratchet 6 months ago. I feels like really bad plantar fasciitis and/or really bad insertional peroneus brevis tendonitis - only under the bone if that makes sense. Went to a podiatrist and let him look at the MRI scans - he didn't see what the radiologist saw and said it MIGHT be a contusion of the calcaneus. Told me to get a walking boot and wear it for 6 weeks. Yeah, that isn't gonna happen. I tried it for 3 days and the pain from being uneven was hurting my hip and back worse than the foot pain was. Anyway, I don't understand the whole thing. I am starting to think that this injury is just a coincidence and had nothing to do with the ratchet incident and could be just a stress fracture from limping around trying to favor the ratchet pain injury. But I really don't get (and the podiatrist didn't get either) how I could have a fractured calcaneus and have pain where and how I have it. So frustrating and confusing. I don't know what to do. It isn't getting better and the pain is actually really bad at the end of every day. Not too bad when I get up in the morning.
Any ideas, suggestions, theories? Thanks.

32 f, 5’ 3”, 130lbs, lexapro 20mg, no birthcontrol. I’ve been having pain during ovulation and more than normal pain during menstruation. I’m trying to figure out my ultrasound results as I'm not sure when my doc will get me in. Hoping someone can help!
Uterus measures 7.3 x 3.5 x 4.7 cm [64 cc]. Endometrial thickness measures 13 mm. Right ovary measures 12.4 cc and contains dominant follicle measuring 2 cm in diameter. Left ovary measures 6.2 cc. Slip of fluid is noted in the cervix. Slip of fluid is noted in the adnexal areas. No pelvic mass seen.

So on April 14th I found out I was pregnant with my first pregnancy. Wasn’t planned but wasn’t prevented either ( we are adult know of our actions and consequences) I’ve always dreamed of being a mom and my partner will be the best father. Anyway we found out and I was crying with excitement and also nervous because I was terrified I was going to lose my baby( I have a genetic mutation that makes it so my body doesn’t intake folic acid properly and puts me at high risk) but 3 days later I started having some bleeding and cramping but the day before I had my blood HCG which was only showing I was 3ish weeks and so immediately I was crying and saying “ no no no “ then called the nurse hotline and they told me that since I’m so early on the cramping and bleeding could be normal and if I pass any clots bigger than a lemon I need to go to the ER. I didn’t but over the next few days I was super vigilant about going and getting my blood tests done every couple of days. At first they were rising appropriately but still bleeding off and on. but then I started having pain on my right side ( it wasn’t cramping it was higher up felt like bloating and gas) but the ER Dr told me “it’s probably a miscarriage or maybe ectopic but we can’t see because you are to early on” and called my OB and told them they need to check in with me everyday. So then the next day my dr did a progesterone test and it was only at a 5.9 and the dr said “it’s not where it’s supposed to be but let’s put you on progesterone supplements.” And then told me to come back a week later. ( even tho the er dr told them they needed to check in with me more frequently) I go in about a week later and told him I was having some pain and I didn’t know if it was gas or water but my whole abdomen was really hurting and he told me to check with my normal primary physician. He also stated “your hcg isn’t where it should be” but then said he’d watch it still. We saw the gestational sac but still couldn’t see any baby because at this point I was supposedly 5ish near my 6 week mark. Said that was “normal”. After the ultrasound I started having severe cervical pain and just was told it was normal. Went to work in excruciating pain and started having clots so after work I waited for my s/o to get off work and we almost didn’t go to the ER because my OB didn’t really seem concerned with my pain and it honest to god just felt like bloating and gas pain. I thought my bowels were twisted. But we show up at the ER and my Dr came in and basically told me since I was here not even a week ago “ we are just treating symptoms at this point cause we can’t do anything since you are pregnant “ and gave me Tylenol and fluids and told me “this is completely normal and my wife went through excruciating pain where she cried with both of our kids” and just completely invalidated any of my pain. Anyways he did a blood test and then when he came back in he told me my hcg levels weren’t looking normal and that they wanted to do another ultrasound. So we did the ultrasound and after that I the pain worsened extremely and they gave me morphine immediately and that’s when I knew something wasn’t right and then my dr came in and told us that my right fallopian tube ruptured and that it was ectopic and my OB was on his way to do emergency surgery and I was already loopy at that point and felt like everything happened so fast.
since then I’ve been recovering physically okay. But mentally I don’t think I’ve fully processed it. Every night since then I’ve been having terrible vivid nightmares about all of my fears. I’m trying to get back into my day to day life but I find myself so angry at my dr and at the world. Why didn’t my dr realize before. Based off my progesterone and pain and bleeding? Like now that I look back it seems so OBVIOUS and I feel so stupid for listening to my dr. I was holding onto hope that my dr gave us. He didn’t seem concerned. He didn’t say anything and then I got a second opinion from our ultrasound picture and was questioning the dr asking why he didn’t send me to the ER right away because the gestational sac didn’t look right. I just… I’m mentally hurting and I lost apart of me even though I was constantly trying to advocate for myself and my baby. I know it couldn’t have saved my baby but I wish I could’ve had my fallopian tube saved… im just hurt and probably taking it out on every little thing but it’s been so hard to just pretend like nothing happened. I feel guilt for feeling stuck while everyone moves on in their lives. I’ve been just putting on a facade and pretending everything is fine.. idk. It’s just been a rollercoaster I feel like.

I'd like to send an apology letter to my ex (2 months breakup and NC). I admit there was some emotional abuse (emotional withdrawing, lies, over defensiveness) from my side during the worst moments of the relationship. I also cared and loved this person very deeply and perhaps it was my avoidant attachment that was a factor in not expressing myself as clearly as I felt. I wrote a letter in an attempt to articulate that I am sorry for my wrongful behaviors and how she was affected by them. I'm not wanting anything from her. I'm trying to be careful in keeping the focus on the apology only and not have excuses or be manipulative. If you take the time to read it, can you please let me know your thoughts?
__________________________
"I’m writing this only to take proper accountability and validate every single point of hurt that you endured because of me. Just maybe, some of these words might offer some measure of healing that you may need. I subjected you to the indignities of dishonesty, betrayal, and disrespect on several levels - all which I have a great amount of remorse for having been the source of. You were right the many times you asked me to show you more empathy for your hurt feelings caused by my selfish lies. You told me on numerous occasions how you felt unsafe based on our conversations and I failed to show you the proper treatment to correct that. I’m so sorry for not approaching those moments with more compassion when it was my responsibility to help you heal through each one, especially during the times you were understandably triggered. No loving partner should ever treat their equal in a way that makes them feel minimized, undervalued, and invalidated. I wish that I would have gotten my shit together much earlier to at least have spared you from the weight of heartache and pain from my abusive behaviors. That was never okay and I’m deeply remorseful for allowing all of it to happen.
It was my responsibility to repair the broken trust created by my stupid lies. I neglected the full effort in helping carry the emotional labor that was needed from me and it was never fair to leave you holding the large majority of that burden. Despite my intentions, I did not show up for you repeatedly and I know that it wore you down over time. I can’t imagine how incredibly hurt and betrayed all of it made you feel and I’m terribly sorry for bringing that to you. It was never right for me to try to justify any of these behaviors using past traumas. They were just fucking wrong, period. Every part of you is beautiful and worthy of tender love and curiosity. You deserved committed support and respect in all aspects of your life. I’m not asking for your forgiveness or absolution. I say all of this to validate your experience and that I am profoundly sorry for the hurt that I inflicted on you. Your feelings mattered and should have always been a priority. I did care about everything more than you may know. I sincerely hope you live in all the peace and happiness you deserve."