FedEx's prominence in both the United States and the world have made it a common topic in popular culture, with examples including the film Cast Away as well as some of its marketing slogans (most famously "when it absolutely positively has to be there overnight"). In addition, FedEx has purchased the naming rights to FedEx Field of the NFL's Washington Football Team and FedEx Forum of the NBA's Memphis Grizzlies. FedEx's air shipping services have made its main hub at Memphis International Airport the busiest cargo airport in the United States, the Americas, and the Western Hemisphere, and second-busiest cargo airport in the world behind Hong Kong.[4]

I am sharing this as an emotional outlet among other siblings in christ 

My Experience It was January 10, 2011. I’ll never forget that date. It was the day my life changed. Also it was the day of the college football national championship. I was and still am a big college football fan (Go Cal Bears!). Oregon was set to play auburn and i was going to watch it with my neighbor two doors down. I had been doing poorly in school, and yeah was a big pot head, still am, but am much more responsible. Anyways i told myself this semester i was going to actually try in school. I woke up at six am to get ready for my day, something that i never do. I went to put on my shoes and i noticed the laces were missing. Immediately i went to my mom and asked where are my laces? She wouldn’t give me an answer and was just acting so strange. Eventually she left the house and as she was leaving two men were walking up our walkway. I figured they were plumbers considering we had plumbing issues recently. They walked in and before I knew it they walked up to me on either side and slammed me to the ground and handcuffed me. I didn’t react as it was, I didn’t expect it for one, and for two when it began I froze, I didn’t know what to do. Once on the ground I started to squirm, I screamed “Please Help me help me I’m being kidnapped! Please!” They responded No use in screaming no one can hear you. I kept screaming. One of them said go ahead get it over with when your quiet it’ll be over sooner. After probably about ten minutes, I realized no use in fighting, they helped me up and walked me to a small suv and put me in the back and put the seat belt on me. This was the beginning. I remember on the way up to Yoncalla Oregon from Sacramento California we stopped at a burger king. They offered to get me some but food was the last thing on my mind. Looking back I wish I had taken up the offer. I remember being by the ashtray seeing a half smoked cigarette and asking to smoke it, they said I couldn’t. After a long drive we got there they walked me in. The whole way I talked about how I’d get away and run away. Well of course they told the staff at Scott Valley. By the way this is the perfect point to say I was sent to Scott Valley School in Yoncalla, Oregon. One of the many so called trouble teen schools. So being told I had threatened to run away I was put on runaway watch. For about two weeks I was forced to sleep under a light. I obviously didn’t get much sleep. Also I always had two higher phase watchers who would stand on each side of me. They had phases there was like five or six I believe. Most were 2 and 1. There were like 3 phase 3’s and 1 phase 5. There was like 20-30 of us at a time. Anyway where do I start. As I write this, with the emotions and ptsd it comes in full force and yet hazy at the same time. Maybe my head trying to protect me? So I was there seven months, thank god thats it. There were people that had been there years. Some of the people there, my god, I don’t know what to say. From a 12 year old who molested his 1 year old brother and put fish hooks in his carpet so his parents would step on it, to kids that were in there later teens who had used hard drugs, kids that had been molested and acted out as a result, kids that just were wilding out period, a lot of different walks. After I got off of runaway watch I got back on it within two weeks. I was in trouble sitting at the essay table while pe was going on. So one of the punishments was writing essays. But anyway there were two other kids at the table, the twelve year old i mentioned above and the only black kid there on the boys side. I looked at them and said if we worked together we could escape this place. They both just dead stared at me. When it was time to line up, the 12 year old went away first, the other kid looked at me and said were gonna get in trouble, that kid is a snitch and is going to tell on you. He was right. I got put on the “wall” because of that. For two weeks when not eating, sleeping, or using the bathroom, I was staring at a wall were a dot was drawn with a piece of paper on it. I would just let my imagination run wild while this happened thinking about home, friends, family, make believe countries governments politics, anything to keep the mind entertained or semi at peace! There was a green jacket my parents sent up for me that was my grandpa on my mothers side. Grandpa Applegate. It was a super cool green jacket with fake fure on the color, it looked like something you’d wear in the winter in Moscow. They said it had too many pockets and I could hide things in it. So they took it away. They put it in the Pod where all of our extra stuff was stored. Well one pod day where we could exchange stuff, there was a different staff member on duty then the one who said I couldn’t wear it. So i got it out and he didn’t know so i got to wear it for a bit. So when the other staff member got back on shift, he saw the jacket. I was banned from wearing a sweatshirt of any kind for a month. When we had outside pe everyday in Febuary to March I would get so cold. When I would put my hands in my shirt I would get another essay. This is Central Oregon, it gets cold that time of year! So some facts about the living situation, you had three minutes for showers and bathroom. You go over that you get an essay. You get more time the higher phase you get. You ever take a shit in three minutes? If done successfully I commend you. I would go five days without shitting because one of the night workers a guy named Johnny would not keep track of time when I’d get up to ask the restroom in the early morning. Johnny was an angel in a sense. Taking an uninterrupted shit was some of the most bliss I could get. Not trying to be gross but when using the restroom even was so restricted, being able to use the restroom not timed felt like hitting the lotto. When we’d wake up at seven am we only had 1 min to get up and make our bed, timed, if we didn’t make it wed get an essay. I’m naming these things as I remember different events, not necessarily in chronological order, but different events that happened. I had a peach fuzz mustache i was so proud of and long curly hair. They gave me a buzz cut and forced me to shave. My dad sent my grandpa Andrews old electric razor. That’s my dads dad. My biggest hero in my life. His name I got tatted on me at 19. I write this at 29. He died when I was 9. Most of the other kids had razors you could charge, mine needed to be plugged in to work, I didn’t understand that. I had never shaved to begin with, so I thought it was broken. I threw it away and put in a request for a new one. My father told them it was a plug in, but it was already to late so he needed to order me a new one. At a group therapy session thing, yeah we did that every day, and none of the people working there had any degrees that could go to the field they were working in. Anyway my writing is not perfect so as I was saying, at a group therapy thing, Jad one of the main guys working there brought up the razor, he said I knew it wasn’t broken, but I just wanted a new one. You don’t love your grandpa youre just a selfish little bitch. Those words still are ingrained in my mind. I know they are false but god damn they hurt. I cried. As I cried he just continued to tell me how selfish I am and im a bitch a pussy etc. William Frederick Andrews was my grandfathers name, as said I got it tatted on me at 19. He was born 1924, in 2024, my first child, a son, was born, William Frederick Andrews II. I call that a moral victory. Crazy how it worked out to be a 100 year difference. Another time it was 420, I cried because I wanted to smoke and he called me out on it in group therapy. He called me a bitch, a pussy, the usual. Weird things happened there, like one time they did a “fire drill” in the middle of the night, we had to go out into the cold in our underwear for five minutes until it was over. There were girls there but they were in a separate area. When they walked by or vice versa we had to look the other way. One of the many reasons it got shut down is there was a case of a student raping another. Apparently the girl who reported it got hounded in group therapy to the point she recanted. Now I could be wrong, but I think I know the person who did it, only one guy from the male side reached level five to the point where he became staff and could go to the girl side for group therapy. I don’t know for sure but that’s what i assume. At one point they were building a new building and they had us digging the ground around it for construction. Yeah they had us do all the cleaning indoors and out doors. If you were bad you could have your school privileges taken away. I had one kid who was a phase above me copy my work. He got caught. He got demoted, and got repromoted before I left. I never got past phase 1. So phase 1 red shirt. Phase 2 green shirt. Phase 3 Blue shirt. Phase 4 and above whatever you want. Like I said a lot of this is not in order. I am writing this in one go after years of talking about it to my loved ones. Put my thoughts to the pen, or keyboard in this case. So they did this thing were it was like a week, where it was the program or some weird name. They would break you down and “build you up” you would get a demeaning name for a week and then get an empowering name. I got the picture that if you were just a weed smoking low grade getting teen, you wouldn’t be ever seen as getting progress, you had to have “admitting to a bad act” of some sort. I made a story about how I let a girl cut me and drink my blood and how I thought about killing my dad. I know, like why would one lie and say that?!, well I figured if I had said I had done that and then shown to be turned good, it would reward me as changed and out that place. Looking back im like what the fuck. But I just wanted out and I was sure as hell willing to lie my way out. So yeah i went by like blood sucker or something like that for a week, but thats not bad. I remember so well one girl who was adopted and had relations with several boys back where she was from, she got sent there for that, and her name for the week was “Orphan Whore”. Also there were other students who weren’t going through the program that were involved with the process. Elon school or something like that where students yell at other students all sorts of insulting shit The end of it I reclaimed my name or whatever and they had me do like a ballet dance kind of weird thing to show rebirth, not that ballets weird, but in this scenario, yeah. I remember there was a day they said the world was going to end, someday in May 2011 some random wacko said, it made headlines as a joke more than anything, but i remember hearing it and hoping it happens because I wanted out. There was a gym there with rafters. I used to dream of hanging myself from them to get out. I dreamed about a car driving into the school and opening a wall up so we could run away. They used to tell us if we ran away there is bear and cougars out there, if they dont get us the cops will, and theyll put us in juvi just to have us sent back when out. They had these things called group essays. If someone did something and it no one admitted to it wed all have to write an essay about how we could have prevented it. One time a kid wiped shit on all the walls in the bathroom, the kid never admitted to it so we all had to write an essay on how we could have prevented it. I remember one time going to use the bathroom there was semen on the toilet seat, lol teen boys sex drive. I just wiped it off before I sat down. One time late at night I was masterbating in my bed. There was 20 of us sleeping in bunks in the same room, the kid who ended up copying my work i mentioned, saw me making some um, sheet movements, and looked my way giving me a dirty look, i just rolled over pretending like i was scratching, oh snap, almost caught. Not trying to be disgusting, teenage boys, find one that doesn’t masterbate, and i’ll give you some ocean beach front property in Kansas. You got weekly phone calls with your parents, you never dared to say what was going on because they were always listening. Letters same, they read them, so no use in saying something, they’ll just read it and throw it away, later my father asked me why didn’t you tell me what was going on? Well… My gf at the time ended up getting a bf after 6 months of waiting, i don’t blame her. Hey it was teenage love so im not hurt, but at the time it hurt because neither of us willingly ended it. She sent me a bookmark to have up there, it had us kissing on it, they took it from me for it being sexually explicit. They banned me from sitting up in bed and praying. I was atheist from 12 to 27 except for that time, i came back to my faith, praying for my exodus. I’m a christian again now, but only after I found a denomination that was open and affirming because I’m bisexual. Thinking about this, my mind can’t explain the pain, the rain of emotional trauma that falls in my cranium. Many times I’ve turned to cocaine, liquor, and suicidal thoughts because of the pain. It fucked my whole concept of everything in life. My emotions, my understanding of control of my own life, my ability to have healthy relationships, just so much. I still have dreams of being back there and wake up with nightmares, I was sixteen then, i turn 30 this year thirty, i have a beautiful amazing wife, a son who is the biggest blessing in my life, like i got it together now, but I don’t still, obvious by writing this. I remember one time getting to get my glasses prescription. They had to take me to town, the eye doctor, i thought about coming to him for help, but I thought if he works with these people, hell just report me to them, not them to authorities. My grandpa applegate, my moms dad, he died of suicide while I was gone, diagnosed with a terminal cancer he took it into his own hands. I never got to say good bye. When his funeral happened I wasn’t brought home for it, no, I was allowed to “write a letter to be read”. I wrote a letter, and it got read and a lot of family members said how deep it was and mature, I till this day have never watched the funeral video, I can’t. Because I should have been there. When I was on the wall, lookin towards the window could get me in trouble, because it was considered plotting an escape. I read in an english class I know where the caged bird sings, it became my favorite poem because I would watch the birds on the outside of the window and see how free they were. The joy of that. I was a juggalo, they banned me of talking anything icp related. I’d hum icp songs in protest, not like they knew them, also still a juggalo, two scoops of whoop. They day my dad came to get me, well I was peeing, and when I got out I saw him by the front door which was not far from the restroom, I ran up and hugged him saying oh my god dad! I love you! I started crying. He took to the place I always heard the workers there talk about a place called the Sugar Shack, a donut shop. Gosh dang good donuts! Then he took me to some cousins on the coast of oregon. Two days being out I was running on the beaches of the oregon coast. The sand in my feet, the breeze, the feeling of freedom. Scotts Valley School was shut down i think in 2016 for child abuse, i will link articles, but damn that place will forever haunt my head. The bats of the cave of my mind. I am married now with a family. I do my best to be a strong individual and provide, but this place has forever scared me and left me feeling weak. I couldn’t protect myself, so now I want to do everything to protect my family and be there for them. Scotts Valley school, I now live in a place called Scott Valley, the geographic area name, all come full circle? There is probably a lot more I could add to this, but for now, I just wanted to write down the bare minimum. If you have read this, thank you. I have found peace in my mind, heart, and soul as much as I can, and I hope those who have gone through similar ordeals can find some semblance of peace in their existence as well. I thank Jesus for keeping me hopeful in times I wanted to die. God bless you all.
https://www.statesmanjournal.com/story/news/politics/2015/12/14/lack-food-among-abuse-and-neglect-complaints-boarding-school/77246394/
https://www.oregonlive.com/politics/2015/12/hunger_vulgar_names_oregon_air.html
https://www.columbian.com/news/2016/jan/07/oregon-threatens-license-of-teen-boarding-school/
https://www.facebook.com/anorexicchild/posts/scotts-valley-boarding-school-in-yoncalla-oregon-scotts-valley-school-starved-th/368786460137878/
https://media.oregonlive.com/politics_impact/otheScotts%20Valley%20Notice%20of%20Intent%20to%20Revoke%20December%2011%202015.pdf
Ps the starved kid in the please eat post is not me

My name is Vince. I'm only 15, turning 16 very soon. I was born and raised by my much older dad and my somewhat older mom in a very, very strict Jehovah's Witness household. They treat the Governing Body and even elders and overseers as godlike figures. It makes me so sick. The rules I have to follow make no sense even biblically. The Jehovah's Witnesses are such blasphemers in the way they take the Bible out of context and twist interpretations to back up their own cultist authority. Even worse, they twist it so that they can't be questioned, and members aren't allowed to even listen to other perspectives or people who disagree with them, as a way to keep their members dumb and indoctrinated. They use fear to force their members to ignore their own doubts and ignore reason, critical thinking skills, literary style, and the need for proper context when quoting any passage, especially a historical book.
I'm a Christian. I believe strongly in the Trinity and that Jesus Christ very clearly claimed to be God in human flesh. Recently, I've been wanting very much to join the football team, as I'm quite athletic and muscular for my age, and I truly love the game. I believe I could play at the collegiate level with the right training. I've been fighting like hell to get there for the past years, but recently I've found faith in the true teachings of Jesus Christ and not the cult of Jehovah's Witnesses, and I do not want to deny or hide my faith.
Recently, I told my parents the news that I believe in the Trinity and that Jesus is God, and I'm a Christian (non-denominational?). It doesn't seem to have hurt my strides to be able to play football, but it definitely didn't go well. My dad scheduled to talk to the elders soon and to have a shepherding call (so culty, omg). I want to use it as a way for my dad to see reason. I've been preparing to debate the elder on my beliefs as a Christian and the truth about the Jehovah Witness cult, at least everything I know, like the pedophilia, the controlling of its members, the real estate, the fact it was founded by a businessman, the blatant ignorance of critical thinking, and the shifty way the organization twists the Bible into using it as a weapon.
All this to say, I'm not sure if just one time is gonna do that or if this is the right approach. I think I'm gonna focus on the football, so mainly I want tips and help with that, preferably using the Bible and jw.org because that's all they'll listen to. But I would also like any members of this subreddit to DM and get into contact with me.
I'm currently working on a 100-page (not sure how many pages but id rather over estimate then under estimate) "manifesto" of sorts deep diving into the entire Jehovah's Witness cult in a way to bring people away from the cult. I already know about "jwfacts.com," but I want to write this in a way that once published, people like me in my position can use it not only to educate themselves but to help their families and friends. Although I'm Christian, I won't be using it as a way to preach my beliefs but only to use my beliefs to show the inconsistency in the way they use the Bible and interpret it.
btw i did use chat gtp to fix gramahtical erros and punctuation, although i dont have a problem with this i just spent the past 5 hours writing an "essay" and making a slide show using jw.org on why it shouldnt be a problem for me to play sports and i also was writing alot on my "manifestio" still idk what to call it but you get the point my mind is mush 😂

I’ve been digging into the Enneagram for about 14 months now. It started with being called a five by a five (a strong endorsement!), so I’ll begin there, and then move on. When I read the description I related to it very much, like “yea, that’s pretty accurate.” It seemed better than any of the other ones, but I was pretty damn emotional for a five, so probably a 5w4 and then in time 5w4 sx. I initially thought I was sp blind, but figured out I’m so blind after quite bit of time and that seems thoroughly accurate. I’m skilled in sp even if I’ve hit overdraft fees, run out of money and had no idea it was gone until “oh shit!” and I’m forgetful as all hell. I can lose pretty much anything.
I think a key feature of fives I related to was the fact that I intellectualized emotions. I was very skilled at it necessarily. It would be some time later when I learned what that is, why children develop that way, and that it’s basically a survival instinct and not anything to be proud of. I was very aware of them, could speak to them well, but I could also detach. When I wanted to I could tap into my emotions, which I enjoyed very much. Rather than plainly talk about them, I would prefer to use metaphor, tell stories, or write poetry–even compose a song on the spot. Just the lyrics and rhythm mind you. Words and emotions are my tools. Objective and emotionally detached, sure. Cautious and private, absolutely! You can’t trust anyone. Compartmentalization of relationships, like this friend knows about X and this person knows about Y but not X and so on. The stinginess…I wasn’t so sure. Avarice. Hm. I guess I’m a pretty healthy five and no other thing seems to fit.
I always had this strange connection with 8, like I’m not an 8, but I really understand the defended stance of 8. I intentionally built internal fortifications against the outside world, like I’m not kidding. You’re not getting in. The anger though. I’ve always had a tremendous amount of anger, and I’ve broken up a lot of fights. I’m good at exerting that kind of control over an environment, like “Knock it off!” and it stops. Maybe that’s the line from 5 to 8? Who knows.
I also figured that my absolutely wreckless and intentionally self-destructive early years could be 7, and also a big vote for sp last. I didn’t think about that too much.
I listened to a lot of podcasts and panels on Enneagram. I cried like a baby during one panel of fives when someone talked about how misunderstood they feel. YES!!!! Someone gets it! I’m not alone! WOW! That was impactful.
I was listening to a couple of people on a podcast talk about 3s and I had to stop it many, many times. I couldn’t get through it. I was just bawling my eyes out. Someday I’ll dig up my notes. I took extensive notes during panel interviews on all 9 types, capturing what resonated with me. I’m quite curious to go back and look now, but that would just make a mess of this post. So 3 hit hard. In my understanding, “3 ruined my life.” That was my takeaway, and also “I’m not a 3.” Things I identified with were the need for approval, like wanting to be loved and seen for who I am motivated everything I worked hard at. It’s what ruined me. I would feel like I needed to watch a movie or listen to a song and sure enough, I would just cry like a baby. Sweet emotional release. I guess that’s a pretty common 3 thing. I didn’t really run people over or care about statusy things, in fact I hated most of that. So a lot of the typical 3 things really didn’t appeal to me at all. I don’t care what award you got or your test scores or what your role is in what company. Unless it helped me directly, I didn’t care at all. I also didn’t care if I had any of that. So there were some pretty big disconnects with 3. Not a 3, but go to hell 3 patterns.
583 tritype I guess. Yippee!
Eventually I’m reading a book on 9s and just start laughing, like I do a lot of these really annoying things and always have. This is hilarious! I went from absolutely amused to “Congratulations! I’m the lame duck of the Enneagram.” LOL I was pretty bummed about that. Not about the type itself, but about its reputation. I’m going to understand the hell out of this right now! That’s when I started reading books. I was learning with a fury.
Reading Chestnuts book on the 27 types I about died during E2, like am I a 2? No way, my mom’s a 2, and I am not a 2! But oh that heart wound. Ouch. It resonated a lot. A lot of 2 did. 2 and 9 mistype a lot, so that’s probably it.
I was listening to a podcast interview with a 1sx and I got that guy, and I mean I got him. There’s no chance I’m a 1, and I mean zero. If I’m aware of rules, it’s so I know how not to get caught avoiding them and working around them. When I was a supervisor, if you transgressed, I knew all the shortcuts and you were screwed. I know all about breaking the rules and not getting caught, even when I get credit with my peers for doing it. I always had a sense of what I could get away with. I was playing baseball with a broom and a ball of shrink wrap with an 8 at work and we dented this big sign. It was hilarious! We’re supervisors. Shut your ass! LOL We totally got away with it, and for years after I got a chuckle every time I walked by that sign. We were peas in a pod.
Not a 1, but I get you 1sx, I get you! I figured 9w1 based on that. I felt 1 on the inside, and 8 on the outside if that makes sense. I see 8 and it makes perfect sense to me, but I feel 1 and feel it’s offness. The affinity with 3 can be explained by the triangle, 1 is a neighbor, and 2…I don’t know. Raised by a 2! That’s probably it, and 2’s and 9’s are pretty similar (not at all!). I’ll qualify that. A 9 is going to follow orders, but a 2 will run the show. Not out front, but let someone else be the front and they’ve got it. They can be an absolute force to be reckoned with too. I would never mess with an unhealthy 2, at least not much.
So I’m going to point out a couple issues. I had the least connection with 7, so if I was a five, that’s a problem. The next number I really didn’t get was 6, and I still don’t relate to 6. I understand it, but it’s from the outside like 8, and it’s illogical as hell. I am not confused about the patterns, focus of attention or why it yo-yos like it does, I just don’t relate to it at all. As I look back, there’s this problem with authority that 6sx has, but it’s for a purpose. My problem with authority was that they were authority and represented rules and obstacles between me and what I wanted, and I assumed they were there to harm me. The idea of a benevolent authority was unheard of for me. I also had a lot of conflict with teachers and all that. They almost universally hated me and provided plenty of feedback to my parents. I got great grades, aced tests, and did a ton of infuriating things. Citizenship was always my problem area. My classic maneuver was to be writing notes, talking to people, folding paper footballs, drawing or writing poetry, but I also knew the answer when they called on me. Just try and catch me! Anyways. 6’s are purposefully oppositional, and I was just oppositional. The other tie in is the desire to be wanted by that one person for the 6sx, sign me up!
So the disconnect with 6 is honestly a problem if I’m a 9. I had a lot of loopholes and mental gymnastics to make it make sense. Looking at it realistically, I should have related hard to 6 being unhealthy and that's where 9 goes in unhealth. It should have rang like a bell, but it was an empty spot.
My deepest ties were honestly with 1, 2, 3 and based on patterns of behavior 5. I really kept private and attacked every problem with thinking and knowledge. 3 was painful; I got 1, and I got 2 a little too well.
I’m going to say that knowing how the arrow lines is critical. Levels of health in Riso and Hudson's Personality Types was really helpful too. Now the problem with that book was that the 1 or actualized or top state was my aspiration, and down the line I related to every single health level for 4. I almost committed suicide out of anger against someone (I had a brutal plan), and went back on it because it would be them winning. FUCK YOU! I REFUSE TO DIE! I’LL LIVE TO SPITE YOU! It was a sad state of affairs, but I was willing to settle for it. I was plenty used to anger, so redirecting it a little was fine to me. No longer pointed at me and you, now it’s all in your direction. Good luck! I don’t know. Who commits suicide because they’re pissed off at someone? Anyways, that seemed oddly specific. Sounds like I could be a 4? I’m making zero decisions until I get through the book. Didn’t really relate to 9. I had previously said I’ll off myself if I’m a four, only half joking. Basically, hell no. I know what a four is and that’s not me! The irony is my oldest is a 4 and we butted head terrifically until I learned about the Enneagram and pegged him for a four right away. So I knew I wasn't one!
I’ve read this book and I’ve read a lot of other books by this point since I took a break from Enneagram, like 12 spiritual books and a few childhood trauma and recovery and all of that kind of books. All of that was immensely helpful. I learned a lot. Like the more I read the more I could absorb and I just didn’t stop. I have a huge book list and I’m going to crush it. So reflecting on this RH book some chickens start coming home to roost. My wife has said a lot of things I’ve flat out denied, like “That’s not a thing” and completely dismissed. Now I’m starting to worry about some of these things. “Everything always revolves around you and whatever kind of mood you’re in!” Things like that. We took a vacation with her parents last year and afterwards she basically said I ruined vacation and her parents were offended. Like what, I can’t sit outside and read? The kids were occupied, and nothing needed to be done. I played with them outside after, but I needed some time to sit in a lounger in the sun with a beer and a book! It was glorious. I went running on the beach in the mornings and watched the sunrise. Anyways, like her parents hadn’t been there and I’m explaining what places have good this or that and so if they want clam strips go here, if they want chowder go there, the crab sandwich here is great, so what do you want? I don’t know if it was the delivery or how I responded to their absolute inability to make a decision or what, but apparently I was grumpy and commandeered the whole thing. I also get a lot of feedback about being judgmental and not accepting normal things, like it always has to be the fancy one. This drives my wife nuts. She’s very humble, down to earth, and has honestly eliminated a lot of that behavior, but it’s still there. I go to 1 and lecture people, but less frequently with her help.
Anyways, there’s a lot of problems. A lot of feedback I just discredited immediately. “Sorry to say you’re wrong, but that’s not how I remember things. I was just trying to….” LOL I’m an idiot. A blind, dumb idiot, and being blind and dumb I had no idea. So like chickens coming home to roost, and this means I am looking at a lot of things differently. A LOT of things. It’s not good. It’s not good at all.
Let’s hit integration lines! 4s get stressed out and the 4 thing (wounded bird, rescue me or I’ll burn you alive) doesn’t work, so they resort to the 2 point. I can’t tell you how shocked I was when I was outlining everything I’ve done for her in an argument and she said “I never asked for any of that!” Mic drop. Damn. I knew what she needed before she knew she needed it and I was ready. She’s like “A hot drink sounds good” and I’m like “I made you this. Are you ready for it?” LOL Too much of a good thing is definitely a bad, bad thing. Holy 2 shenanigans.
I took a job I really don’t like to work on 1. I didn’t know Enneagram. I just knew that I rarely follow the calendar and am way too unpredictable for my wife and it stresses her out. You know what? I can work on that. I’m taking a job that requires a lot of admin, which I’m admittedly horrible at. I’m blessed with a wife who is a real whiz at it and doesn’t mind doing it since she knows it’s done right and won’t worry if I forgot to pay the electric bill. So I have a very boring job that I pretty much hated, but it’s good hours during the week, not at night, not super long days, predictable schedule, all things that work well for the family. Deal. The problem isn’t that I can’t organize or that it’s chaos, it’s that I am not motivated to do admin work. I see it and just deflate. My excitement balloon just went fizz and plop, dead on the floor. I begin work with a cup of coffee and about a half hour of procrastination. Once time is getting tight, I hit it hard. Then I get up and walk around. You know, regain some motivation. I chunk out my workload and when I’m ready, I take a break. I’m terrific with a “do the work on time and correctly and no questions asked” kind of scenario. I have a lot of flexibility on how, which is why I think I’m still doing it. There are other perks, but that’s not what this is about. I hate the work, love everything else about the job which is considerable. My favorite part is honestly creating macros and picking color schemes for my send-outs. I did one for Valentine’s day, another for Good Friday, Easter, Spring, and now I’m onto a bright summer palette. I’m gearing up for Memorial day, Fourth of July and then I’ll be in another area and have plenty of new to keep me busy for a while. I’m neat and clean for 1 I guess, and I have the talk style of 1 down. Plenty of feedback my way on that. I’ve probably enlightened a few too many people a few too many times, or corrected them a few too many times. People usually asked me to edit their emails because I write mine so well, but only one person ever was a repeat customer. “You’re brutal!” LOL I take writing seriously when it counts. My favorite college course was actually a capstone level English course and I was a business major and chose the class because it sounded fun. The professor asked if I taught English before and I said “Nope, never!” In fact, I almost failed the writing proficiency test to graduate high school. I still find that hilarious.
So basically, I’ve gotten a lot of feedback about 1 and 2 and sadly 4 behaviors, as well as 5.
I also have the pre-Christ era of my life I really don’t talk about. It’s like I was a different person entirely, but I understand it well now. I understand a lot now.
NOTES AND TIPS
Don’t rush to finding a type. The silent observer in Rohr and Palmer’s books are really the key, and I love Palmer’s book “The Enneagram” for it’s simplicity and focus on putting you on a spiritual path to self awareness. It’s not woo woo or dogmatic, but extremely practical, and short. With that you get to watch yourself and learn yourself.
Watch the arrow lines. You should identify with the disintegration arrow pretty strongly, integration as well, and then at least one wing should hit pretty hard. I would look at those more than the actual type based on my experience. 4 flew under the radar. I picked up the static of these other types long before 4.
I needed a lot of self-awareness and meditation. That internal equanimity was missing. I would shove emotions down in conflict because if I didn’t I was going to cry or destroy something. I’ve done a lot of damage to a lot of people (and property), plus I had a seriously unhealthy childhood which left me as an emotionally immature adult and just not equipped to deal with this stuff in a healthy way.
Without reading books on childhood development and recovery I don’t think the feedback on my moodiness and being a general pain in the ass would have gotten through. I’ve had emotions for a while, but now they’re…safe. Not a danger to me, and not a danger to anyone else. It’s pretty damn cool! I took a step outside last night for some fresh air before I went near anyone at one point, but I can do that now. I can pull the emotions into my body and place them, then air it out later. I think of like Naruto and the auras, emotions are like that for me. When I get hit with one, it’s like radiating out. I thought I was good at masking, but my face betrays me, which I think is on purpose honestly. I smirk a lot. If someone is up for an off-tilt joke, just ask what the smirk is there for. I’ll share. If you like it, come back for more. When I want to really suppress I can show nothing, but then I don’t feel the emotions and I really don’t like that. That’s a dangerous place. Hot emotions are a lot better than cold ones. Moderated ones are best of all though, and that's totally doable. Practice, practice.

VII. The Ideological Assault on the Ego
The Exhaustion of Political Ideologies after World War II
…
The demands of “emotional survival” prompted a third course of action, leading many “world-conscious people,” as Dorothy Dinnerstein puts it, into attempts to renew the capacity for devotion on the modest scale of personal friendship and family life, “in the service of some spiritual equivalent of the ancients’ household gods.” The events of World War II reduced radicals of her generation, Dinnerstein writes, to a “state of moral shock,” a condition of “historic despair so deep that few of us could recognize it clearly as despair.” What made these events so shattering, she argues, was they they did not result simply from the actions of evil men but seemed to be rooted in large-scale social structures as such. “The impulse to build large-scale societal structures which would contain and eventually greatly reduce these nightmare forces was stalemated by massive evidence that large-scale societal structures per se - not just those in capitalist countries - were the habitat in which they managed most hideously to thrive.”
Dinnerstein argues that the postwar generation, even in its flight from politics, communicated to the next generation its “infernal vision of society” and its quasi-solutions to the problem of emotional survival.” <“Riding the Tiger”> Thus it inadvertently planted the seeds of the cultural politics that flowered in the sixties and seventies. From this point of view, the radicalism of the sixties represented not so much a return to political commitments after a period of political retreat as a metamorphosis of personal life into politics . “Make love, not war.” The most characteristic features of the new left derived from its attempt to “combine the ‘personal’ with the ‘political,’” as Shulamith Firestone noted in 1970, and from its belief that the “old leafletting and pamphletting and Marxist analysis are no longer where it’s at.” The new left’s suspicion of large-scale social organization; its rejection of democratic centralism; its distrust of leadership and party discipline; its faith in small groups; it repudiation of power and “power trips,” work discipline, and goal-oriented activity in general; its repudiation of “linear” thinking - these attitudes, the source of so much that was fruitful in the new left and of so much that was futile and self-defeating as well, originated in the central contention (as the San Francisco Redstockings put it in their 1970 manifesto) that “our politics begin with our feelings.”
Such a politics can take many forms: radical feminism, environmentalism, pacifism, nihilism, a cult of revolutionary violence. “Cultural revolution” is an ambiguous slogan. In China, it was invoked on behalf of systematic attacks on intelligence and learning, a revolution against culture . In the West, a critique of “instrumental reason” has sometimes degenerated into a Dionysian celebration of irrationality. The revolt against technological domination points toward “addled subjectivity,” as Lewis Mumford has called it. But in spite of the anti-intellectualism, the infantile insurgency, and the taste for destruction so often associated with cultural politics, it addresses issues ignored by the dominant political tradition: the limits of reason; the unconscious origins of the desire for domination; the embodiment of this desire in industrial technology, ostensibly the highest product of the rational intelligence.
The Neo-Freudian Left
The best way to understand why the idea of a cultural revolution encourages such contradictory applications is to study its attempt to ground social theory in psychoanalysis, with the usual disclaimer that many exponents of this position take no interest in psychoanalysis at all. But those who did turn to Freud, in the years following World War II, did so for good reasons. His work - in particular Civilization and Its Discontents, which provided both Brown and Herbert Marcuse with a starting point for their investigations of culture - seemed to speak more directly than any other intellectual tradition to the question that haunted the postwar world: Why is it precisely the highest civilization that has developed and unleashed unprecedented powers of destruction?
In order to address this question, Brown and Marcuse had to discard an earlier tradition of psychoanalytic radicalism, developed in the 1930s by Wilhelm Reich, Eric Fromm, Karen Horney, Gregory Zilboorg, and other “neo-Freudians,” who tried to press psychoanalysis into the service of social reform by emphasizing cultural instead of biological determinants of personality. The cultural school had set out to strip Freudian theory of its “biological determinism,” its “disregard of cultural factors” and “social conditions,” its undue emphasis on sexuality at the expense of “feelings of inferiority” and the “hunger of appreciation or affection,” its neglect of “interpersonal relations,” its “patriarchal” bias, its “hydraulic” theory of psychic energy - everything, in short, that allegedly stamped Freud’s thought as a product of nineteenth-century mechanistic science and bourgeois culture. Reinterpreted in the light of Marxism, feminism and cultural anthropology, psychoanalysis allegedly undermined the idea that sexual difference are divinely or biologically ordained and therefore unchangeable, destroyed the myth of the patriarchal family and monogamous marriage, and laid bare the psychological dynamics by means of which the patriarchal family and a repressive sexual morality served “to maintain the stability of class society,” in Fromm’s words. Feminism, Marxism, and psychoanalysis thus appeared to converge in an expose of the authoritarian family and of the “patricentric” personality who experiences suffering as guilt instead of injustice, accepts his lot instead of trying to change the social conditions that make him unhappy, and “identifies with the aggressor” instead of attempting to unite the victims of aggression against the prevailing social system.
In their eagerness to bring psychoanalysis up to date and to reconcile it with progressive social philosophies, the “neo-Freudians” deleted whatever was distinctive and original in Freud’s work and ended up with a psychological theory that merely confirmed what every literate, humane, right-thinking man or woman already knew. As Marcuse noted in his “Critique of Neo-Freudian Revisionism,” they “flattened out” the “depth dimension of the conflict between the individual and his society” and turned psychoanalysis into a “moralistic philosophy of progress.” According to Brown, they reversed the axiom that the child is father to the man, restated by Freud and supported with new evidence, and wrote instead as if toilet-training, parental injunctions against masturbation, and other child-rearing practices, repressive or enlightened, played the decisive role in psychological development. By dropping the “whole theory of infantile sexuality,” they recovered optimism “cheapy.” In place of psychoanalysis, they served up “lullabies of sweetness and light.” Even Reich, who rightly argued that “to fulfill its own therapeutic promises, psychoanalysis has to envisage a social transformation,” went astray, according to Brown, “in limiting the social transformation involved to the liberation of adult genital sexuality.” As Marcuse tried to show, the transformation of the polymorphous perversity of the infant into genital sexuality already reflected the triumph of the performance principle, as he called it, over the pleasure principle. A social revolution that aimed to break the cycle of domination and rebellion could not stop with the creation of a more permissive sexual morality. A so-called sexual revolution that confined itself to genital pleasure could easily lend itself to new forms of domination. The task confronting the culture revolution was not to set aside more opportunities for erotic indulgence, as a momentary release from the demands of alienated labor, but to eroticize work itself. The task was not to enlarge the domain of leisure but to abolish the very distinction between work and leisure, to make work into play, and to get rid of the aggressive, domineering attitude toward nature that informs the present organization of work.
Marcuse on “Surplus Repression”
The postwar reformulation of psychoanalytic social theory had to begin, then, with an attempt to undo the damage done by the cultural school of Freudian revisionists. For Marcuse, Freud has to be approached much as Marx had approached David Ricardo, as a hardheaded ideological opponent whose work needed to be taken more seriously than that of well-meaning but tender-minded ideological allies - the utopian socialists for Marx, the neo-Freudian revisionists for Marcuse - and when properly understood, contradicted its own assumption that human happiness remains a mirage “Freud’s own theory,” Marcuse insisted, “provides reasons for rejecting” Freud’s pessimism. Marx had turned political economy against itself by arguing that the laws of the market, described by Adam Smith and Ricardo as natural, inevitable, and unchanging, derived from a particular series of historical developments and were therefore open to further modification. In the same way, Marcuse historicized Freud. Whereas Freud’s theory of civilization derived the need for repression from the “natural” disproportion between human desires and the demands of reality, Marcuse tried to show that “natural” categories under close analysis proved to be historical and that repression originates not in the “struggle for existence but only in its oppressive organization.” By distinguishing between repression and “surplus repression,” Marcuse tried to give a psychological dimension to Marx’s theory of alienated labor, according to which labor beyond what is necessary for human survival goes into the production of “surplus value.” Surplus repression as Marcuse called it, originates in the organized apparatus of class rule and domination, which forces men and women to labor beyond the satisfaction of their needs. As society becomes more complex, the relations of production become increasingly hierarchical and the psychological sanctions enforcing alienated labor correspondingly severe. Thus civilization inflicts on individuals a burden of renunciation, of psychological suffering and guilt, bey
Just as Marx’s critique of political economy demanded a historical analysis of alienated labor, Marcuse’s position appears to demand a historical analysis of its psychological consequences, a history of surplus repression. Whereas Marx devoted much of his life to a study of changing modes of production, however, Marcuse fell back on Freud’s dubious theory of the primal horde, which traced the origin of patriarchy to the abortive uprising against the primal father. The sons overthrow the father but internalize his authority and reimpose it on women and children. This “patriarchal counterrevolution,” according to Marcuse, becomes the prototype of failed revolutions ever since. The alternating “rhythm of liberation and domination” arises out of the sons’ unconscious identification with the hated father. Instead of ridding themselves of his rule, they reestablish it in the form of the “patriarchal monogamic family,” which institutionalizes instinctual renunciation, channels “polymorphous perversity” into the single acceptable outlet of monogamous marriage, and enforces submission to social rules and the patriarchal compulsion to work. The uprising of the rebellious sons momentarily breaks the “chain of domination,” according to Marcuse; “then the new freedom is again suppressed - this time by their own authority and action.” Once established, this pattern repeats itself throughout history - as in the life and death of Jesus, which Marcuse reinterprets as a struggle against the patriarchal laws in the name of love, a struggle betrayed by Christ’s disciples when they deified the son beside the father and codified his teachings in oppressive new laws.
The theory of the primal horde served Marcuse, as it has served other theorists of the Freudian left, as a substitute for historical analysis, an admittedly “speculative” and “symbolic” encapsulation of the entire course of patriarchal history. It is easy to see the idea’s attraction for the left. It not only implicates the family in the origins of a repressive civilization but spells out the psychological linages between them. It purports to show how the Oedipus complex, and with it the whole apparatus of patriarchal domination, transmits itself from one generation to the next. It traces the Oedipus complex back to the dawn of history and thus helps to define the need for cultural revolution that transcends a mere change in power or institutions and breaks the cycle of rebellion and submission. But as Marcuse himself pointed out in his attack on the cultural school, psychoanalysis offers the “most concrete insights into the historical structure of civilization” precisely when it least concerns itself with developing a general theory of culture and sticks instead to clinical concepts - “concepts that the revisionists reject.” This warning - unfortunately unheeded by most of those who attempt to remodel psychoanalysis as a social theory, including Marcuse - applies with particular force to Freud’s speculations about group psychology, both in his essay of that name and in Moses and Monotheism, which rest on a model of mental conflict already discarded in the more strictly psychological writings of his last phase. Freud’s increasing awareness of a more deeply buried layer of mental life underlying the Oedipus complex, his revision of his instinct theory, and his new psychology of women point to the conclusion incompatible with many of the generalizations he continued to advance in his sociological writings. For one thing, this new line of analysis suggested that sexual pleasure is not the only object of repression. For another, it suggested that the agency of repression is not simply “reality.” Accordingly the outcome of the Oedipus complex - the theory of which Freud now made explicit for the first time - cannot be seen simply as the submission of the pleasure principle to a reality principle imposed on the child by the father. It is not just that parental commands and prohibitions, toilet-training practices, and threats of castration play a less important role in the child’s development than Freud had previously thought. The entire conceptual scheme that opposes pleasure and reality, equating the former with the unconscious and that latter with conscious adherence to parental morality, has to give way to a different model of the mind.
Marcuse himself challenged Freud’s group psychology in an essay published in 1953, misleadingly entitled “The Obsolescence of the Freudian Concept of Man.” Noting that Freud saw all social groups as revivals of the primal horde, with a “leader as a unifying agent” and the “transference of the ego ideal to the leader as father image,” Marcuse went on to argue that modern societies have dispensed with patriarchal imagery and patriarchal authority. “The fascist leaders were no ‘fathers,’ and the postfascist and post Stalinist top leaders do not display the traits of the heirs of the primal father - not by any stretch of the ‘idealizing’ imagination.” The emergence of a “society without fathers,” according to Marcuse, “invalidated” the “classical psychoanalytic model, in which the father and the father-dominated family were the agent of mental socialization.” The “decline in the role of the father” reflected the “decline of the role of private and family enterprise” and “society’s direct management of the nascent ego through the mass media, school, and sport teams, gangs,” and other agencies of collective socialization. These changes led to a “tremendous release of destructive energy,” a “rampant” aggressiveness “freed from the instinctual bonds with the father as authority and conscience.”
What these developments invalidate, of course, is not the “Freudian concept of man” but a social theory “extrapolated,” in Marcuse’s own words, from Freud’s extrapolations of clinical data into prehistory. They invalidate the idea, already weakened by Freud’s later work and by much of the work subsequently produced by Kleinians, object-relations theorists, and ego psychologists, that repression originates in the subjection of the pleasure principle to the patriarchal compulsion to labor. Yet Marcuse continues, even in his later writings, to condemn the “performance principle” as the primal source of human unhappiness and alienation. Forgetting even his own plea for the union of work and play, he insists that “no matter how justly and rationally the material production may be organized, it can never be a realm of freedom and gratification.” Because work “serves ends outside itself,” it remains “inevitably repressive” for Marcuse - a “neurosis.” For this reason, he argues that the liberation of Eros demands the technological abolition of work. Disavowing any intention of advocating a “romantic regression behind technology,” he insists on the liberating potential of industrial technology. “Is it still necessary to repeat,” he asks in his Essay on Liberation, “that science and technology are the great vehicles of liberation, and that it is only their use and restriction in the repressive society which makes them into vehicles of domination?” Automation alone makes it possible for Orpheus and Narcissus to come out of hiding. The Triumph of polymorphous perversity depends on its antithesis: instrumental rationality carried to the point of total regimentation. Presumably an exercise in dialectical thinking, this line of argument should give even Hegelians pause when they read (in Eros and Civilization) that the “transformation of sexuality into Eros presupposes the rational reorganization of a large industrial apparatus, a highly specialized societal division of labor, the use of fantastically destructive energies, and the co-operation of vast masses.” The achievement of “libidinal work relations,” it appears, requires the organization of society into a vast industrial army.

I got Confirmed on April 14th, and I thought my life would be better than it was, and I feel like it's changed weirdly for the worst. I love God and all his teachings, or at least I feel like I do, but I don't feel as connected to him as much anymore. Before Confirmation, I felt very connected and was always pretty happy. Sure I committed some mortal sins, and I really hate myself for that, but I feel like after Confirmation, everything dropped. I've committed more sins, and to be specific, mortal ones, and every time I try and talk to God, or pray, I just feel lazy. I feel like the vice of sloth is coming for me. I also haven't felt focused during my football matches. I play keeper, and I feel like I've lost my talent and everything. My Confirmation saint is Saint Luigi of Scrosoppi. The patron saint of footballers. I don't want to start any arguments about soccer or football, so let's just keep it on the main topic in the comments alright. Back to what I was saying. I feel like the devil is taking over me somehow, and I'm slowly falling farther away from Christ each day. I think deep down I want to be with him and commected to him everyday of my life, but I just can't come to a conclusion. I was born into the Catholic life/faith, and I want to continue, but I don't know how. I feel a little better after writing this, but I know it's really just a layer of fake happiness that is covering me right now. Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated. I feel like my life is falling apart and I don't want it to. If I do fall somehow, I want it to be into God's arms.

Hello! I’m a 27 year old guy from The Netherlands looking for my soulmate. I don’t mind being lonely. I’m an introvert who enjoy being alone, to spend time with my hobbies and improve as a person but I have a lot of passions in life and miss having someone to share that with.
About me:

⁃ I’m a devout Christian. I converted last year and since then religion has become one of my greatest passions and purposes in life. I never had any true direction in life until I found Christ. I vigorously believe in live and let live because values and religious beliefs are something personal but my traditional principles are important to me and I try to live by them to the best of my ability. ⁃ I often describe myself as an “old soul”. I feel like I don’t fit in with modern society. I feel nostalgic for the past, love history and older movies and listen to music from the 70’-90’s era a lot. I sometimes miss my childhood and long for the time when everything was much simpler and much complicated and people developed genuine connections with each other; I despise materialism and hedonism. ⁃ I’m a hopeless romantic. This is probably obvious from what I mentioned before but I feel alienated from the dating scene. I dislike (which is an understatement) casual relationships and hook ups and I want a deep, emotional connection with someone. I love kissing and holding hands and want to plan romantic dates like long walks on the beach and cuddle while we watch a good movie or play video games together. I want to take care of someone and make them feel like they’re my whole world. I’d say intimacy (non sexual), words of affection and quality time are my love languages. ⁃ Travelling. I haven’t been able to do this much but I’d love to have someone to explore the world together with ⁃ I love learning and trying out/experiencing new things that can be anything from food to hobbies. So if you have a passion or interest I don’t have I’d love to learn about it and explore that with you. ⁃ I’m extremely passionate about writing. I write fanfiction and one of my dreams is to publish a book one day. I also read myself. ⁃ Sports. I love watching sports (mainly soccer and American football) and I try to visit a game once every weekend. ⁃ Video games. I used to play a lot of video games but other hobbies have kind of taken most of my time and I lost interest. I still love playing video games to past the time but I mostly play Apex Legends lately. ⁃ I’m a bit of a geek; If there’s a sci fi or fantasy franchise I probably love it. I also enjoy anime. ⁃ I love cooking, especially cooking for someone else. ⁃ I don’t smoke or use drugs and only drink socially or at events (in moderation) ⁃ As for physical appearance as far that’s important: I don’t have any tattoos or piercings and aren’t planning to get those- I’m 5’7 and I have black hair and brown eyes. ⁃ I value loyalty, honesty, passion, selflessness and generosity. I am loyal to a fault because when I’m in love with someone they’re my priority and the only one for me. ⁃ Last but not least I’m neurodivergent which means I have a tendency to hyper fixate on things sometimes. 

You:

⁃ A woman of the human species ⁃ Between 18-35ish years old ⁃ You enjoy feeling protected and someone taking care of you ⁃ Preferably a Christian but it’s not a requirement. I’m just looking for someone who understands and respects my beliefs. ⁃ You ideally live in Europe or the Netherlands so we can meet easier. But I’m open to an LDR. ⁃ Physical appearance isn’t a priority but I’d lie if I said it didn’t matter. I’m looking for someone who’s smaller than me height wise (or the same height) and I prefer natural women; I guess I just like ordinary human beings. ⁃ You’re looking for the same things I am and have similar values. Good morals and a sense of humour never go wrong as well. ⁃ You’re not too left on the political spectrum when it comes to social issues. It’s not really something I care about but I feel like my lifestyle and way of thinking clashes a lot with those beliefs because of how they’re inclined to be sex positive and I’m the polar opposite. ⁃ Likewise you don’t do drugs or drink a lot 

What i’m looking for:
I’m looking for a long term monogamous relationship and with long term I mean lasting forever. I want a holy matrimony (they won’t let me say the other word 😂) in the future and kids, I’m kind of on the fence about that and I can go either way but I like the idea of possibly having kids, both biological and adopted.
Other than that I just want someone who can be my companion in this journey called life and who I can share things with, both the good and the bad. I think loving someone and being loved in return for who you are is one of the best things in life.
I’d love to start out as friends and let things develop naturally and if I happen to find someone here to connect with and make a new friend then that’s cool too.
If you’re interested feel free to send a message and tell me a bit about yourself :)

For a bit of backstory: I was raised in the Bible belt, which is a feat that's admittedly difficult for a queer kid who (still) doesn't know how football works. Due to some church hurt during my formative years, I pushed religion away for a while w/ sort of an "all or nothing" mentality until I learned that there were other options.
Now, the problem: I've researched denominations that align with my beliefs and views on the Bible, but it's still a tough thing to decide. I'm not asking for you to decide for me, but rather, to provide insight (& basic information) on the three I'm considering.

• Evangelical Lutheran Church
• United Methodist Church (North America)
• United Church of Christ

If you're a part of any of these denominations, are particularly knowledgeable in them, and would like to give me the basic rundown, I'd be glad to hear it!

Episode 3: Oathbreaker

We began at the summit of Mt Atria in the blighted palace of the Virtuous. The sky streaked with shimmering multicolored light. Carviliius (dragonborn member of the Antiqua) lay in the center of the plaza, cradling the body of Aurum, their god. As the rest ot the Antiqua realized that they could not bring Aurum back, their thoughts turned to their own deities, and at once they dashed to the various towers that their gods had called home here on the highest peak of the world. I followed Parvus (the kobold cleric) as they searched for the god Themself, though I observed that Parvus moved with less haste than his fellow Antiqua. Following the cleric across the narrow walkways and through ruined halls and temples, they arrived at the tower of Themself. Upon entering, it was immediately apparent that the god was not there, dead or alive. I confronted Parvus about what he knew and why he had (against kobold culture) taken on a name. Parvus revealed that though he knew nothing of the death or disappearance of Themself, that he and the god had not seen eye to eye for a long time. He also told I that it had been hard for him to be alone and that the name Parvus had given him dignity. Kelnys followed the elf Barabask, as they made their way towards the tower of Theolon, crying out in desperation as he neared the home of his goddess. The cleric did not have the strength to open the door to the door, so appealed to Kelnys for help, who was able to open it with ease because his stats are insane. As with the tower of Themself, nobody could be found. The tower had been ransacked. A mural of a great tree towering over mountains defaced and scarred. Barabask dared to hope that Theolon’s absence meant that she may have survived and disappeared to discover what more he could find out. Dolly and Malakine (tiefling member of the Antiqua) rushed to the tower of Alakash, their deity, and discovered his lifeless body strewn on copies of his fables as his blood stained the parchment. Dolly asked the once-buoyant Malakine who could’ve done this and the Antiqua unthinkingly responded, “Only one of Them” before recovering to claim that she didn’t know. Hiding in the shadows, Raidion followed the dwarf Gronoth to Ullin’s tower. Hearing the rageful sobs of the cleric, Raidion entered to see him holding the body of Ullin. Her platted red hair streaked with grey. Her skin just as Alakash’s was; deeply-wrinkled by age. As Raidion revealed himself he asked Gronoth who could’ve done this. The dwarf replied that they could not speak of it here, but that they should journey to the city of Baruun to Gronoth’s estate where he would return and explain it all. Finally, Endellion and Morgan went after Genevieve (the human cleric of Ignas). On the way there, Endellion questioned Morgan on why the party had been brought here; why the Antiqua had needed guarding when their powers far exceeded those of their supposed guards. Morgan told her that it was due to the sacred nature of The Deference; that it was about maintaining the vows the Antiqua had made to forego much as they journey to commune with their gods. Satisfied for the moment, Endellion continued to follow Genevieve to the tallest tower in the palace, where the three of them found the body of Ignas. Her once fiery crown turned to the colors of spent coal. Morgan collapsed at the sight before Endellion and Genevieve (somehow sharpened by the adrenaline coursing through them) began to give instructions to shake him from his grief. As the others left, Endellion hung back and looked out of an easterly facing window. Above the top of the Allanites (a mountain range at the very edge of the world) she could make out a shape. A shape beyond the mountains. She called Genevieve back to confirm it, but the cleric fixed her with a stare and told her that she couldn’t see anything. Endellion, confident the cleric was lying to her, chose not to pursue the matter further. I, Dolly, and Kelnys found magical items in the towers of their gods; a cloak, a ring, and a suit of mail, respectively. But Raidion’s search proved fruitless. He did, however discover the source of magic that destroyed Ullin’s tower and Ullin herself. Evocation, and the magic was either weak or the spells had not been recently cast. As the Antiqua brought the bodies of the Virtuous to the first plaza, the parties gathered on the other side of the palace and discussed the discoveries before realizing that the light streaking across the sky originated from a small stone chamber. Within that chamber, you found the body of the elven goddess Theolon. Her hands across her chest, laid out at the base of a plinth. Dolly recalled that Theolon had formerly been a god of The Wild who had changed sides in the Divine War, thus tipping balance in the favor of The Virtuous. Within the plinth, where the body lay, there were three orbs; one of pure white light, one of pure black with a flickering ring of blue, the last a kaleidoscope of ever-changing color. Raidion sensed great magical presence here, the greatest he had ever encountered, emanating from these orbs, that as you listened, seemed to whisper. Raidion cast mage hand and touched the orb of white light and voices filled the chamber calling out from each orb with references being made to a child, the wild, the murk, the briar, and the destruction of Reliquiae itself. The voiced ended with the words “the shadow will flood”. With this, the orbs dimmed and I looked out to the west, to a far away source of light. A great tree towering above the Allanites. A tree in a place that should not exist; that you have been told does not exist. The party tried to make a plan, debating whether to tell the Antiqua, the Web, Morgan, or none of the above, what you’d heard and seen. Eventually you agreed you’d travel to Baruun, meet with Gronoth, and reveal nothing to the others. Once outside that small stone chamber, you heard raised voices as Parvus and Barabask attempted to justify their gods not being found in the palace. As Runa held Parvus by the throat, Kelnys brought forth the body of Theolon. Themself now became a target for all suspicion, with I interceding on behalf of Parvus, telling Runa (the orc cleric) that she and the others had turned Parvus into something that was not kobold. The tension rising, Gronoth acted as a peacemaker before Dolly, Endellion, and Kelnys and Morgan began to display symptoms of the same blight that had affected the wolves. The Antiqua were quietened by this and Barabask roused himself writing a letter for the party to give to Jasmee (a cleric of his order) to ensure the party would be saved from the blight. He warned you that you may not have long before the blight completely took hold. Genevieve told the party to say nothing of what you had seen, should panic grip the populace. After leaving the palace, you returned to the plateau where you did battle with the blighted wolves, and discovered one so-marred by the blight it could barely move. Endellion put the beast out of its misery as Raidion spotted a vine wrapped around what appeared to be a creature. As the party approached, the vine attacked, revealing there to be nothing within its limbs as the plant life of the mountain seemed to become hostile to you. You quickly dispatched the vine and headed down into the cloud line, emerging into more blight. It was spreading. The first snowflakes ever to fall on the Mountain of Perpetual Spring began to settle on the ground. As you picked your way down the mountain path, the ground shook and a landslide careened towards you. Through a combination of dashing and daring and tying yourselves together, you evaded the landslide, a corrupted, once-quizzical bear, and even managed to keep Morgan alive despite Endellion’s best efforts. At last you were clear of the blight, back in the spring sunshine, back among the lush greenery of the mountain. So the landslide has passed. The last loose stones are still skittering down the mountainside. The empty smell of the blighted earth begins to fade on the breeze and the light has started to dim, night is approaching. The scarlet sunset over the Allanites glows on the snow that carpets the ground on the base of the mountain.

♪Episode Song References♪

ᕕ( ᐛ)ᕗ

​

• 00:55:19 Ben:“You are apple bottom jeans boots with the fur, you are right now.” Flo-Rida- Low
• 00:55:22 Harry:“Truly truly truly truly” Jem & the Holograms Theme
• 01:13:25 Ben:“who will buy…” Oliver - Who Will Buy (My Sweet Red Roses)
• 01:56:23 Aoife:“making my way” Vanessa Carlton - A Thousand Miles
• 02:31:23 “reach out touch Raidion” Depeche Mode - Personal Jesus

Highlights
​

• 00:12:48 Learning about the Exhaustion debuff.
• 00:14:28 I:“They needs rest.” Raidion:“So do I.” I:“I is fine…”
• 00:17:00 Kelnys:“I feel weird…Tingly.”
• 00:17:15 Dolly:“You know, back home, people used to tell me I could ‘convince the sky it was red’ and that I could ‘argue a crow white’, stuff like that. Up there on that mountain, that was the first time I really felt speechless seeing something. That was not good; didn’t feel good.” Morgan:“The world’s changed.” Dolly:“Yeah. It feels that way and now every time I think of that-- can’t even call it a wolf anymore, up there, I don’t wanna end up like that. Crawling along on its belly, barely able to say or feel anything. Is that what’s in store for us?”
• 00:20:43 Alex’s first critical fail with a natural 1.
• 00:21:20 A shared trait between Kobolds and Hobbits.
• 00:27:50 Morgan:“You’re never out. You’re just in something else.”
• 00:28:40 Aoife rolls a 25 for persuasion Harry:“You wanna hear some Morgan lore?” Alex:“Some Lore-gan.” Just like everyone else I suppose. The Web helped me do something I couldn’t’ve done alone. It helped me hurt the people who needed to be hurt and that sometimes still feels right. Sometimes that still feels good. For the rest of the time, I don’t know. I have nothing but The Web. I have no one but The Web anymore.
• 00:31:27 Fan Art Moment I:“You is strong, Big Scale.” Kelnys:“You is wily, little brother.”
• 00:33:33 Kelnys:“I think you’re all neat.” Morgan:“Cheers.”
• 00:34:22 Hollie cannot hide her doubts about Morgan taking first watch.
• 00:39:05 Raidion reveals a mysterious deck of cards as the first item he found in his possession after awakening with no memory.
• 00:40:50 Raidion’s regret
• 00:44:27 Morgan:“I will not take lessons in faith from you.”
• 00:46:54 Endellion:“I don’t like the idea of being that weak.” Ben’s “Oh damn!” face is priceless. Alex’s too.
• 00:47:51 Ben:“Oh no…She Dead!”
• 00:49:10 LEVEL 4 Raidion rolls 6/6, adds 2 CON for +8HP to his total. Endellion rolls 6/10, adds 2 CON for +8HP to her total. Kelnys rolls 5/8, adds 3 CON for +8HP to his total. I rolls 4/8, adds 2 CON for +6HP to his total. Dolly rolls a 2/8, adds 0 CON for +2 HP to her total.
• 00:56:15 Spoon shenanigans after completing a long rest.
• 00:57:24 You start to make your way down the mountain pass. It takes you about half a day to get down that mountain.
• 00:57:48 Doug:“I think, because we’ve seen the squishy one just get pummeled, I’d like to offer this wonderful magical mail that I found.” Ben:“Do the voice.” Kelnys:“Hey Dolly, you want my mail?” Alex breaks laughing
• 00:59:35 As you descend, you have this sensation of leaving ‘Spring’ again and moving back into cold, but moving into a natural cold. The air begins to chill and Winter, as you reach the base of the mountain, has gripped the land. There’s snow thick on the ground; more has fallen even since you first began your ascent. After the Eternal Spring of the mountain, this cold air is almost like falling into water and you’re steps are sluggish in this powdery snow. Ahead of you is a collection of tents. Great vast tents that you saw from the top of the mountain. The bright colors of the Festival of Benediction, which are made more vibrant against the stark white of the snow. You can see in the joints of these canvas tents, where they overlap. Little curls of smoke drifting up towards the sky. You can smell (when the breeze blows in the right direction) you can smell roasted meat. You can hear, every now and then, across the wind, the sound of a flute or the beat of a drum. You feel like you’re moving towards life after so long in this sort of stasis and darkness of the mountain. These preparations, by the time you get closer, are well underway and there’s dozens of workers. They’re wearing these robes of rich blue and they’re constructing a wooden stage under the first of these tents that you reach. They’re bell tents, and they’re supported by these huge poles, some of these tents are hundreds of yards in diameter. They’ve been specifically erected, to house and shelter from the elements, the thousands of people who’ve made their way here for the Festival of Benediction. Just to remind you, this is the festival that marks the true beginning of Winter on the second moon of Winter. It’s the time when the Antiqua descend from Mt Atria with instructions from The Virtuous and give the teachings that the gods are going to want acted upon this year.
• 01:05:30 Harry:“Maybe not sexy concubines, but…if religiosity is sexy, Wooo!”
• 01:13:00 Doug’s grunt of disapproval at the mention of children in Harry’s description.
• 01:13:16 Harry busts out several vendor NPC voices.
• 01:15:45 The group finds “Sister of the Earth” Jasmee
• 01:22:42 Dolly:“Thank you!” INTERMISSION Jasmee has just said “Get behind me, I need space.” She looks at the six of you and she says “I’m sorry.” BATTLE MAP!
• 01:40:45 Ben:“Camera three is getting one helluva show.”
• 01:45:00 “Let’s trust Aoife’s dice”
• 01:49:10 Negotiations make a breakthrough
• 01:52:24 Doug’s epic pop-up face.
• 01:55:21 [censored]
• 01:58:06 Morgan busts out an epic use of Dreadful Aspect. “There is no god. There is no light. You think I’m afraid of you?!”

Dreadful Aspect (Recharges after a Short or Long Rest): You exude magical menace. Each enemy within 30 feet of him must succeed on a DC 13 Wisdom saving throw or be frightened of you.

• 01:59:22 Ben gets hyped for ya boi Morgan and nudges Hollie like a fan of the rival team at a football (soccer?) match. “Can I just say, that was very narratively satisfying.” Harry:“Namastae.”
• 02:08:44 Raidion busts out his brand new Hypnotic Gaze spell. Unfortunately Jasmee rolls a critical on the save and Harry makes it clear “That went badly.” Ben is clearly loving this and makes human tippy taps.
• 02:10:44 “You have a guard all up in your grill.”
• 02:15:28 Ben:"What’s in the box?
• 02:16:48 Aoife finally gets the scroll out and gives a look of “Christ, mate!” to the props person responsible.
• 02:19:10 I uses the Beg ability in the middle of the fray, confusing the guards into disadvantage for the turn.
• 02:24:33 Morgan decapitates a guard and “a little hand-painted portrait of the most beautiful litter of kittens you’ve ever seen, falls from his robes.”
• 02:29:13 Hollie:“Twat him!”
• 02:29:33 Harry:“Morgan nearly died so many times and I make up some puppies and suddenly I’m the baddie.”
• 02:30:58 Fan Art Moment Jasmee’s spell reflecting off Raidion’s Shield. “You have no power here.” “Yes I do. Nice trick.”
• 02:31:27 Obligatory direct camera stare from Ben in the style of The Office after Harry’s song reference. Then he switches back to giddy smack talking mode.
• 02:33:33 Raidion’s clutch cast of Minor Illusion to recreate the final portion of the message from the orbs in the Temple of the Gods.
• 02:38:52 Dolly rolls a 24 on Persuasion to convince Jasmee of their innocence.
• 02:41:12 Harry:“In many ways, The Quizzical Bear lives on.”
• 02:42:00 I retrieves the arrow from the guard he shot it with.
• 02:43:55 Jasmee explains that she will spread word that the team as deceased to enable their escape from whatever nefarious forces seek their demise.
• 02:44:50 Blight cured!
• 02:48:27 Jasmee:“Your lives weren’t mine to take.”

Let me know if I missed anything you liked in the comments.
Cheers,
Gramps

FedEx's prominence in both the United States and the world have made it a common topic in popular culture, with examples including the film Cast Away as well as some of its marketing slogans (most famously "when it absolutely positively has to be there overnight"). In addition, FedEx has purchased the naming rights to FedEx Field of the NFL's Washington Football Team and FedEx Forum of the NBA's Memphis Grizzlies. FedEx's air shipping services have made its main hub at Memphis International Airport the busiest cargo airport in the United States, the Americas, and the Western Hemisphere, and second-busiest cargo airport in the world behind Hong Kong.[4]

I want to say first off I think the protests overall are a beautiful thing and has helped raise more solid awareness for Palestinian lives than ever before. I fully support the right to protest and I think protesting is a based and very effective form of political action. However, one thing that is incredibly unfortunate and extremely annoying to me is that there are some Tankies, Campists or Antisemite agitators get in and try to derail the whole image of the movement by shouting Hamas/Houthi slogans, saying horrifically antisemitic rhetoric, and calling for collective punishment of all Israelis.
People like Jackson Hinkle definitely fall right in line with the fascist camp and just treats geopolitical conflict where hundreds of thousands of lives are at stake like a fantasy football match.
Those people are awful and do not deserve to be in the movement at all. I want to clarify however that the behavior of a few jackasses doesn’t mean the whole movement is automatically invalidated. That’s ridiculous and a bad way of looking at it. You are going to get people saying stupid and crazy things at any protest for a positive progressive movement. While there isn’t that many bad actors really, they still have to get out. However, I think I may have some possible solutions to these problems.

1. Bring in Israeli Palestinian coexistence groups like Standing Together and B’Tsalem. They can give much more guidance to college aged protesters on what people from the Middle East want and give their perspectives on horrid terrorist groups like Hamas or Hezbollah in order to instill in them that a group is not automatically virtuous just because they hate the United States. Also shows that not every Israeli supports the atrocities being committed by Netanyahu’s government and that there are Israelis that want co existence with Palestinians.
   
2. Arab Spring activists can explain how they went against dictators in the Middle East like the Assad Regime. Activist from the Arab Spring can speak directly to an audience about dictatorships in the Middle East and how brutal their crack downs were along with some of their most blatant human rights abuses.
   
3. Having people who are knowledgeable on spotting political red flags in people like Tankies or Campists and being able to kick them out as soon as possible. As soon as they start doing Hamas, Hezbollah, Ayatollah, and Assad apologia, they need to be shown the exit door and just leave. Those people do not care about Palestinians or anyone in the Middle East. We don’t need those sorts of optical liabilities anymore, especially right now.
   

What are some other good methods that can be used to keep bad actors out of the Pro Palestine movemet? I would absolutely love to hear your thoughts because I think it is incredibly important for the movement to have the best image and optics possible in order to be truly effective.
EDIT: Also, counter protesters attacking Pro Palestinian students should be charged accordingly. I also highly condemn the actions of the IDF and their horrific assault on Gaza. Currently, 34,000 innocent Palestinian civilians have died and it is absolutely tragic. I despise the actions of the IDF and of Netanyahu’s far right government.

To his next lover: I hope i never serve as a competition to you, because by the time you enter his life, i hope he has long forgotten my name and my presence, and every useless information that i had enlightened him with. But i hope that you will read the below and keep them in mind

At first, he may seem tough. Gym guy who looks fit, rbf and cuts hair for people. He wouldnt really smile, unless you see him alot around his friends. Otherwise, he would just float in the back ground and he wont speak until spoken to. But please be patient with him. Please take time to get to know him, let him take however long he needs to open up, and unleash his true personality. Let him tell his lame jokes, let him sound dumb and pretend like wtv he is talking about makes sense, let him be goofy and match his energy, let his go-with-the-flow mindset seep through his cracks and support them. He will never fail to surprise you with what hides underneath that gangster-like persona, so please dont give up on him As you get closer to him you will learn about stubbornness and slight laziness but also warmth and peace. He values love, but also his own space. Let him have space to think, space to do his own thing, space to relax. Give him time, but also be there for him when he needs. He may be hard to talk to sometimes but dont lash out on him, dont be mean. He may seem like he wont care but deep down he would keep thinking about it. Dont only let him be the therapist, help him. He doesnt really know how to ask for help and he isnt really used to getting it so please be patient, please try to put aside annoyance and anger. Listen to him, he values a listening ear alot. Rant to him, he likes knowing that he is trusted with insights that no one else knows about. He would keep your secrets, he would care. Show him you like him, flirt with him, drop cringey ass pick up lines from time to time, send corny jokes. Show him u care, pester him to tell you whats wrong, spam him when he doesnt reply within 3 miliseconds, if he likes you, he wont find u annoying at all. Tell him about your life, he would gladly be interested in what ur friends think about him and you tgt, he would constantly try to impress you, and all u have to do is be there to support him with any decision he makes. He has a strong work ethic, wtv he wants, he would work towards, he cares, so please care about the things he cares about, ask about his hobbies, and passions and watch his eyes light up or the endless graphics of "typing..." light up on your phone. Compliment him, boost his ego from time to time, he values specific compliments, especially on things he pays special attention to, compliment his cologne and hair. Spend time with him, his love language is quality time. He cares about spending time with you, he would squeeze in any time with u if he could. Plan dates, take turns, put in effort to go out with him, free ur time for him too. When u do go out, help him pick which hot wheels to get, pay special attention to the little details he talks about, he would be surprised when u bring it up casually after awhile. He doesnt expect ppl to remember the specks in his passing comments. Bring up things he hasnt talked about in a while, constantly try to know more about him as he could often forget to talk abt himself when hes busy listening to you. Please listen to him, he really needs it sometimes. Help him take pictures, even when hes not looking or whip out ur phone to take selfies with him use goofy filter on them. He would help u take pics too, and he would sneak pics when he thinks that ure not looking. Send telebubbles, send snaps, be his new bff on snapchat. Pester him, spam him, he likes all these things. Its not annoying to him, he would pester you with shit like this too. Spam him with tiktoks, so he knows that uve been thinking of him. Each tt he sends also is v impt to him. Its also kinda his love language and he sends them to u cus he genuinely thinks of you. Do corny shit with him. Match pfps, take videos, do cute tiktoks about him. Dont be afraid to show him off. Don't purposely hide his existence away from the world, at least let the world know that there is a guy u like in ur life, blur his face out and post him. he will tell his mom about u and constantly update her and ask for advice. He would post u on his cfl. He will want to wear ur initial on his wrist and put u as his wallpaper. His go-to focus mode will even be ur initial. He would match ur ig notes, he will constantly reply to ur stories. He cares, care for him too. Accept his acts of service and gifts. Dont turn them down if u can. When u do he feels hurt and rejected, but please dont always let him pay. He would constantly get small gifts for u and rmb the littlest things that you talked about or posted online. He would get it for u if it is within his means. Please dont take advantage of him. Let him walk u home, or he would get out of the train impulsively just before the doors close after uve already gotten off awhile ago, he will then call u and ask if he could walk u home. Dab him up before going into ur house, or sneak in the hug that i never had the courage to. He is kind and has a good heart. Please be gentle with him, he is in fact a softie. Initiate. He also likes physical touch, but dont make it awkward. Secret hand shakes, knees touching in the movie theatre, or shoulders brushing against one another. He appreciates it. He wont for the life of him express that he likes corny stuff but trust me he does. Also show him love through acts of service. Help him hold his wallet when his hands are full, and when hes so nervous to go out with u till he cant walk, guide him by tugging onto the back of his nike backpack. Take "private but not secret" pics of him, "softlaunch" him, show him off even if its privately. He probably brings along a sweater for you, so purposely dont bring urs to the movie theatre. Purposely shiver and let him ask u if ure cold. Say yes and let him offer u his sweater. Appreciate him. He is very thoughtful, he would help u take ur food, and would refuse to eat his food before ur food arrived. He would take utensils for you, and help u pick out ur bowling shoe size. If ure terrible at bowling dont worry, he would encourage u and clap for you even if u lose terribly. Dont be fooled, he would use ur terrible techniques against u eventually and tease u abt it. He would offer u mints, and would bring along a sweater that he never uses. He is always complaining about heat, bring a portable fan every time u go out and shove it in his face when he complains to shut him up. He plans dope dates, let him. He walks you home after every date. He would send u private guitar covers and give u his guitar picks. He would even fight sleep demons to stay up just to keep u company late at night. Please support him in anything he does. U can give ur opinions but remind him to prioritise his own. Let him talk about his passions, and go to the church events he invites u to. Be open minded about religions and accept christ if you are willing, dont walking into this if ure unwilling to convert. Religion if very important to him and he prioritises it, so please think properly and dont go into this if you wont do it, dont be like me. Support him in hobbies and goals, wish him good luck in every football match, big or small, congratulate him on his business occasionally, every cut that he does matters to him. He has come a long way. Please be proud of him. 

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I spun around. I'd gotten used to the platitudes, but Nick didn't give me the opening to reply, "You keep refusing to admit you can't play by the same rules as everyone else, heroes included. You could learn magic, psychic powers, even that chi shit, and you keep just letting yourself back into fuckin' powers rather than picking a direction. You sitting still? It gets people hurt."
He'd hit it on the head, the part of my mind that told me I could've prevented it. I dropped my head, ashamed, and I said nothing. Nick gave me a moment to let it sink in, then pulled my head up so I could look him in the eyes, "All you had to do was work on telepathy. Yeah, I get it, there's downsides, so get 1% better at negating 'em. If you'd started when you first realized you could, you'd have been able to know where everyone was, how many, what weapons, and who was a legit threat with them. You could've used a magic shield for the cops, some sort of sleep spell to put the bad guys the fuck out peacefully! You had every option open to you, and you sat on your goddamn hands!
"Now, you wanna stop it from happening again? You wanna honor those who died to teach you the lesson? Figure out how to fix the damn thing, and stop holding back! This personal pity-party shit was good at first, but now it's time to sort your shit out. Do whatever you gotta do, but this crap? It doesn't fix shit!"
And then he walked off, leaving me to myself for the first time since it had all gone down. Virtus chimed in: Every leader I remember, and all the ones I've learned about since we came together have gone through this, Marcus. You can do this. I'm here for you.
I considered, and made a decision: I put in a temporary leave of absence with the office and the H.A.A., both of which were more than willing to grant it given what all had happened. Everyone had been more worried when I threw myself into the reports and paperwork, hand-writing letters to the families of the fallen. Anna was concerned, but understood there was a certain catharsis in the action, she just made sure to talk things out with me in session. I let Anna know I was going to miss a few sessions, but that I was good, I had a direction. She wasn't thrilled with it, but she got it.
I brought up the H.A.A. computer, and brought up the database of knowledge that they had. Nick was right. I'd directly avoided doing almost anything with trainable abilities, trying to limit myself, and it had indirectly led to this state. One more thing I could chalk up to my refusal to admit to what my life had become. I needed to get on the ball, and fast, starting with opening up my psychic ability to move around and do things.
That brings us to my emancipation hearing. It was finally time, and when I showed up to the court, the gallery was flooded with people. I knew most of them, but there were people I had no idea of, I'd never met or talked to them before in my life, but they weren't reporters. When I stepped into the court itself, Mackenzie, Merida, Mom, and Dad trailing behind to either side of me. My teachers, Mr. Bethel, Mr. Tsumpti, Father Patrick, Mrs. Brown, The Road Crew, John and Anna from the H.A.A., there were so many people present. I took my spot where the bailiff motioned, with my family filling in around, and I felt Aimee touch my shoulder from behind. I kissed her hand, and Nick quickly went over what was going to happen. Eventually, the bailiff called, "All rise!"
Everyone stood up, and I could hear shuffling from outside the courtroom as the attendees moved to watch the proceedings on the TVs outside. When everyone was standing, with the obvious exception of Mr. Bethel, the bailiff called out, "The honorable judge Frank Carter, presiding."
Dad muttered to himself, "Tell me Bethel doesn't do that joke."
An older gentleman came out in black robes and proceeded up toward the bench, pausing as he saw the mammoth crowd, then at me. I just shrugged, and mouthed an apology. It was all I could think of. He tilted his head a bit, shrugged, and took his seat behind the bench, "Be seated."
He flipped open the case file and checked it quickly, going through the time, date, case number, and that it was my emancipation hearing, "Before we begin, I would like to take a quick poll. Raise your hand if you are here as character witness for Mr. McKenna here."
I looked back and every hand was in the air. I don't even know most of these people, and a clerk waved from the hall outside, and hands up out there as well. Even on the monitor in court used for distance proceedings, hands were up on the individual screens of the Zoom call. It took several minutes before the judge got a text, and then address the stenographer, "Let the record show that Marcus McKenna has 247 character witnesses for the claimant. And how many are here as character witnesses against the claimant?"
Hands dropped, and the clerk outside the court looked around for a moment, and made a zero with his hand, and the judge once again looked to the stenographer, "Let the record show that there are zero character witnesses against the claimant. Now, is there an attorney of record present for the claimant?"
Nick leaned toward the microphone in front of him, "Yes, your Honor. May I call my client up to the stand, if it pleases the court?"
The judge considered a moment, then nodded, "Proceed. Mr. McKenna, please take the stand."
The bailiff escorted me up to the witness stand, and I stood there as I got sworn in, then sat down. Nick stood at the central podium, and looked to me, "Marcus. You are credited as the first open superhero, yes?"
I nodded, "Yes."
"One of the first and most vital requirements for emanicpation is that you must choose emancipation of your own volition. Is this the case for you?", Nick said, comfortable in the thing he loved so much, and I'll be honest, first time I'd heard him talk this long without swearing.
"It is," my knees shook as I spoke. God, so many people here.
Nick took a measured pause before his next question, "But do you really want emancipation?"
He was moving me somewhere, and I wanted to just say yes, "No, not really."
I could actively everyone's breath catch for a moment as Nick nodded, unphased, "Could you elaborate, please?"
I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding, and was shaking my head. I had my hands on my knees, to steady them as they felt like they were going to wobble, steadying my eyes on the floor of the well as I spoke, "I didn't want any of this. I never wanted this power, I don't want to be a hero. I just want to go to my Scout meetings, camping, spend time with my girlfriend. I wanna read to my sister, Merida, and get in some stupid fight with Mackenzie, to just hang out with my buddy Darryl.
"But I do have this power, this constant 1% improvement, and it gives me a higher responsibility. I've fought against it, tried to keep throwing the brakes on it, but there are too many people who are depending on me, and this ability changes everything. I can't hold onto who I was, not the mundane parts at the very least. To my mind, it would be morally no different than a doctor standing by doing nothing as a room full of patients they could easily save die."
My knees were relaxing a bit, and my breath was coming easier. Nick continued on with his questions, "This power, this 1%, why does it make things so different? Could you give me an example."
I took a moment to collect myself, "Well, let's start with my power being always 'on'. It's not a power I activate, I'm just always improving. For instance, from here, I can see that your tie clip has the Yale emblem on it, and is precisely fifteen feet and seven and three-quarters inches away from me, twenty-seven degrees below my eyeline. You're proud of your achievement in graduating Yale Law, the number one law school in the country, but interestingly, your favorite tie that you're wearing doesn't match it. It does, however, match the colors of the Marine Corps. You never served, but I'm guessing your Dad did, which by your age, means he likely fought both in the first Gulf War, and then, again guessing, Iraq and Afghanistan after 9/11. I saw a trifolded flag in your house the one time I was there, so he didn't come back, and I can't imagine how much that must have hurt. Also, the stenographer just misspelled Afghanistan- she outpaced her own typing and hit the S before the I because she's left-handed, I'd like to request a short bathroom break so the bailiff can go pee before he hurts himself cause he's more used to standing guard than being a bailiff since he was a Marine by the way he reacted when I mentioned your dad, and His Honor hurt his left hip somehow, but he's hiding the slight limp by standing extra straight and putting more of weight weight on his right, so my guess is he tripped or something, and is a bit embarrassed about it for no real reason. I get anyone wrong?"
The judge confirmed the stenographer had indeed misspelled Afghanistan, who was deeply shocked. I hadn't even been looking in her direction, concentrating on Nick's face. He then confirmed with the bailiff, and got it all on the record, "Let the record show that Afghanistan was spelled incorrectly, the bailiff does need a trip to the lavatory... sigh... and I hurt myself yesterday trying to keep up with my grandson at two-hand touch football. Ten minute recess."
I stayed in the witness stand as everyone left, and Nick came up to me, "God, man, I'm sorry, I was just-"
He cut me off, "No, it was perfect, kid. Yeah, it went great. We'll get a bit more mundane after this, but I needed them to see it first so they understood what's different here. I'm good."
While I was technically dismissed, I didn't move. Christ, there were just so many people, this was nuts. I waited patiently until the court resumed, with all the formalities covered. With things back in motion, Nick picked back up, "Alright, now, let's talk about the requirements for emancipation. What employment do you have?"
"I am CEO of Aegis, Incorporated, as well as a registered hero with the H.A.A., and I have income through sponsorships, which are related to my Twitch, TikTok, YouTube, and other social media site incomes," Pretty straightforward, really, but it sounded so daft when I said it.
Nick held up a file, "Your Honor, may I approach the bench?"
The judge motioned and gave ascent, and Nick strode across the well, "I'd like to enter into evidence the financial statements for Marcus since he first started receiving streaming income. Also included are his self-made budgets for his apartment, vehicles, and other related expenses for the next five years, including projected increases in rent, utilities, and groceries over time, assuming the Portland limit of 10% rise per year.
After those, are a copy of his high school diploma, gained at the end of September of this year, his account statements, and finally, his stock holdings."
He returned to the podium, and the judge accepted the evidence. Nick looked to me again, "Can you tell the court what emancipation means for you?"
I shrugged a small bit, "It means that I will be a full adult in the eyes of the law. I can be charged as an adult, my parents won't be required to hold custody on me, nor will they be responsible for me. I can sign contracts such as my apartment lease, legal documents, and other stuff. It means a lot of things, I read up.
"For me, though..."
I winced slightly, "Sorry, Dad- it means I stop getting slowed down. At every turn of this thing, I've been having to move faster in a legal and economic sense, and in those arenas right now, I have to stop every time a piece of paperwork needs signed, to go get my Dad to sign it for me, and usually lately, I have to explain the paperwork to him, given the nature of what I'm doing. Calculating it out, and allowing for the fact that it's going to be increasing given the current run of things, I'm properly losing about five to seven hours a month to having to explain things for my dad just so I can get started. It would like you needing to get all your contracts run past your parents, you wouldn't be taken seriously by your clients, or the legal system as a whole. For reference, though, Dad was Dean's List at Portland State."
"Thank you, I have no further questions. For my next witness, I would like to call John Cox, head of the Portland Branch of the Heroes Association of America."
I was dismissed and returned to my seat, and got the shoulder squeeze from Dad. John confirmed that he believed in my maturity enough to put the fate of the entire state in my hands despite a history of fighting with each other, and that the H.A.A. recognized my powers as creating a deviation that advanced my consideration for age.
Then Mr. Bethel was called up and sworn in in front of the witness stand to accommodate the wheelchair, then jumped in before Nick could ask anything, looking over to the judge, "Your Honor, sorry about not standin' when you came in, but I think I may have tweaked my knee a bit."
That fucking joke. He'd been sitting on it, waiting to let it out, and everyone who'd been in Scouts with him in the courtroom groaned as he grinned like an idiot. Eight years. I've heard that joke for eight years, every time there was a situation where people were asked to stand for something. Merida still thought it was hilarious. Nick confirmed he was my Scoutmaster, and then gave his recommendation, "Marcus is a Life Scout, and really, in half a year, he'll be Eagle. The only reason for that is that time in rank is a requirement. If not, we'd already have pinned him, but he wants to do it his way, and there's respect in that. He's arranging his Eagle Scout service project. Not sure why, since just the last few weeks, he's done more service for the community than any Scout in history, but he respects the rule, and he didn't name any of those things as his service project. If he doesn't count as a MAN, we're all fucked!"
People laughed, and the judge banged his gavel, "Mr. Bethel, please watch your language. You may continue."
Nick had no further questions for Mr. Bethel, and then a succession of my parents, Anna, and some of the others who'd been with me got up to the stand and gave their testimony. The judge was about to call, but Nick had one final witness he wanted to call, and implored the judge that it was critically important. The judge finally nodded, and my whole world lurched, "Thank you, Your Honor. I would like to call to the stand Julio Ramirez."
Ramirez...
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“Driving a car isn’t consenting to getting into a car accident.”
“Taking 10 shots of vodka isn’t consenting to getting drunk.”
“Eating 5,000 calories a day isn’t consenting to gaining weight.”
“Smoking cigarettes for 20 years isn’t consenting to lung cancer.”
Do you see how ridiculous you sound? And I’m not even pro-life, let me get that out of the way before someone slaps that label on me, although I’m sure my outright declaration of that is not going to stop many people. But Jesus Christ in heaven above… please come join me in reality. Do you hear yourself?
When you make a choice, you consent to the implicit risk associated with that choice. There is no exception or way out of that truth. That is a fact, regardless of what someone on Twitter has told you. This is a part of life and something we face every single day in every choice we make.
When you drive a car, it is 100% implied that you accept the risk that you may get into a car accident, but you do it anyway because the convenience of driving the car outweighs the potential of getting into an accident. When you smoke a cigarette, you accept the risk of lung cancer, but people choose to do it anyway because the satisfaction of the nicotine outweighs the risk of cancer in that person’s assessment.
Society understands this at large in quite literally every other circumstance, but for some reason we are now pretending that sex is the exception because some person on Twitter thought it sounded good. It is not an exception, again, regardless of what online infographics have led you to believe. The fact that this even needs to be explained to the level I’m dissecting it here is remarkable, and the fact that people are going to find this controversial is even more shocking.
And I already know people are going to blame failed birth control, which is an incredibly, incredibly small amount of cases if the birth control is actually being used as intended. My reply to that would be, that is part of the calculated risk that you assess when you have sex. It’s common knowledge that there is no birth control that is 100% effective. Everyone knows that it’s possible, albeit an incredibly small possibility if you’re using it right, that it will fail. This is like wearing a seatbelt to minimize your risk of injury or driving slowly to be safer. It’s not 100% effective, but you are taking steps to move the odds in your favor as much as you can, but still partaking in the activity. Let’s also not pretend that everyone who has an unwanted pregnancy is using birth control as intended, or at all.
At the end of the day, you can’t say nonsense like this and expect anyone living in the real world to take you seriously. You come across like an entitled child who is unable to comprehend that actions have consequences. What you’re essentially saying is “I only consent to positive outcomes from my actions! Not anything negative!” That is not how the world works.
Not everything in life is a corporate HR seminar in obtaining clear and enthusiastic consent. You live in a reality that places consequences upon you for your choices and behavior regardless of your personal feelings about it. Nature does not ask for consent and this is the most basic level of common sense that is fathomable. The second this argument leaves someone’s mouth, I know that their phone screen time is 14+ hours a day and most of that is spent fighting with people on social media. I can’t even believe we’re at a point in society where we are able to absolve ourselves of anything negative that happens to us to such a high level that this argument is being taken even moderately seriously.
Saying idiotic things like this sets the pro-choice movement back and makes everyone who supports it look like a clown. Get a better slogan, because when I hear this it makes me want to become pro-life simply out of spite for how brain dead this argument is. Cue the people who will show up to this post tossing together a nonsensical and cushy-sounding word salad that they pulled from an Instagram infographic to try and explain how what I’m saying is somehow controversial.

You all remember Mahsa Amini, the 22 year old girl who was arrested and beaten by the morality police for not wearing hijab correctly, later she succumbed to her death. This sparked nationwide protest across Iran in 2022, Iranian women started taking off and burning their hijabs. The government arrested thousands of protestors many of whom were killed, a lot were killed in the streets by the IRGC. There were news about the guards deploying non-Iranian Arabic speaking troops who were killing protestors, you can still find them in the newiran subreddit. And it was most likely the Houthi & Hezbollah militia men because they are are trained and backed by Iran, they speak Arabic and are Shia.
Iranian women aren’t only forced to wear the veil, but they have to face much more obstacles in the regime.

One of the first acts of the revolution’s leader, Ayatollah Khomeini, when he took power in 1979, was to reverse women’s rights in marriage, child custody and divorce. This included lowering the legal age of marriage for women from 18 to 9, and girls this young can still be married in Iran today.
Iranian women have not only been forced to veil but have been forbidden from dancing or singing solo in public, riding a bicycle, attending matches in sports arenas, becoming judges or president. They must sit at the back of the bus and can travel abroad only with their husband’s permission. Their court testimony and inheritance are deemed worth half that of men. They are among the very few women in the world whose grandmothers had more rights.

https://time.com/6313431/iran-women-defiant-amini-anniversary/

• I remember this subreddit was very supportive of the protestors back in 2022 and very vocal against the brutal regime while other Muslim subreddits were either completely silent or tried to brush off the topic by claiming that Iran is shia so it doesn’t concern the Sunnis.

The problem that arises now is that this evil regime and its pets are the only ones who seem to give a shit about Palestinians while the Arab leaders have been silent. Houthis have attacked Israeli ships, Hezbollah was about to enter into a war with Israel. Iran and Israel have exchanged bullets many times in the past, most recently Iran launched missiles and attack drones at Israel as a retaliation.
And because of this perpetual Iran-Israel conflicts, a lot of anti-regime Iranians seem to have become pro-Israel which you can observe in the newiran subreddit. And I don’t blame them for this, because it's natural for them to adapt the “the enemy of my enemy is my friend” after being oppressed for so long by the government. The USA killed IRGC officer Qasem Soleimani in a drone strike and it made anti-regime Iranians happy naturally because IRGC protects the mullah government and are responsible for much brutality. There are videos of Iranian school kids refusing to chant death to Israel slogan (yes, chanting this political slogan is a practice in Iranian schools!!) & instead chanting death to Palestine, there were pro-Israeli rallies held in Iran, videos of Iranians refusing to walk over Israeli flag, Iranians calling to shove the Palestinian flag up inside their a$$ in football stadium, Iranian people setting fire to anti-Israel pro-Hamas billboards. I saw those clips in this video.
And remember, these videos are filmed inside Iran, all the people you see here are Iranians living in Iran and not Iranian diaspora living abroad.
After browsing the newiran subreddit, it seems to me that the anti-Palestinian mentality mainly stems from these three reasons→

1. Iranian government backs Hamas and other armed rebels in Gaza, therefore these groups and all Palestinians are my enemies and since they are the enemies of Israel, therefore Israel is my friend.
   
2. Iran & only Iran comes first, and the Palestinians have nothing to offer but Israel can help us dethrone the Iranian regime and instill a secular, non-theocratic government.
   
3. Because Iranian authorities commit the oppression in the name of Islam and Islam is an Arab religion, therefore the Arab culture is responsible for the state Iran is in today. In a simplified way, Iranian Regime = Islam = Arab culture = Arabs = Palestinians.
   

Many Palestinians are pro-Iran because only Iran seems to give a shit about them while Arab rulers are completely silent. But in 2022 when Palestinians were asked about the death of Mahsa Amini then everyone said they support the Iranian protestors. I mean it makes me really sad that Palestinian people were sympathetic to Iranian protestors but Iranian anti-Regime people hate Palestinians. I understand when you get oppressed for so long by your government it's natural that you adopt "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" stance cause only the enemy of your enemy is attacking that government and killing it's officers who oppressed and tortured you, but I wish they could understand that all Palestinians do not support the brutality of the Iranian government and all Palestinians are not Hamas or other Iran backed group members.
It's a sad scenario where you have no choice but to pick an evil. I support Palestinians as much as I support the anti-regime Iranians, I want to see an Independent Palestinian state as much as I want to see the Iranian regime fall during my lifetime. But both seem impossible at the same time because of all the geopolitics. If you want to support Palestine then you have to support the Evil Iranian regime and it's minions & throw the anti-regime Iranians under the bus. And if you want to support the anti-regime people of Iran then you’ll have to throw Palestinians under the bus and support Israel.
P.S.: The first YouTube video I linked are made by two exmuslims, Armin Navabi and Harris Sultan. While I have nothing personal against exmuslims, these two are quite pro-zionists but I couldn’t find anyone else explaining those anti-regime protest clips in English (Armin is Iranian so he understood what was being said in those clips) that's why I linked their video. There are pro-Palestinian exmuslims too like Apostate Aladdin and Secular Spirit. The Secular Spirit guy is in fact a Palestinian exmuslim who is very critical of Israel, anti zionist and his video on the recent Israel Hamas war is one of the best explanations on this topic so. They have criticised other pro-Israel exmuslims like Apostate Prophet and were harassed by his zionist followers. And there are also anti-regime Iranians who do not support Israel, I have seen comments from some of them on exmuslim subreddit and elsewhere. But a large number of them in the newiran subreddit and other online platforms seem to be very supportive of Israel, extremely hate Palestinians and turn a blind eye to every Israeli crime 😓.

Hello guys!
I grew up in a Pentecostal church. My great grandmother and mother were some of the most holy, Jesus loving, faithful people I knew. They lived as close to the Bible as they could, and maybe beyond it.
I strayed from Jesus for many years, living in complete sin and denying Jesus. I recently got saved again and accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior, having risen from the grave.
I have been struggling lately. I am trying to decipher what is sinful and what isn’t. I know that the Spirit will put conviction on the heart, but sometimes, I’m not sure.
An example: I love going to football games with my friends. We like to have drinks and listen to music that will get us excited for the game. Some of this music has lyrics that speak of sinful things. Sometimes I overindulge with alcohol. Where do I draw the line? I don’t want to lose these good times with my friends, but I want to obey God and not sin.
I just need some help with direction and decision making. I know everyone is different, but I also know there some clear guidelines. I’m stuck in that in-between zone right now.

Now before I explain my reasoning, I know there’s a lot of issues that need addressing and FC 25 must address them if the game is to improve.
I’ve been playing more Ut recently after taking a break from it and mostly playing pro clubs. I see a lot of discussions on X and on here about the gameplay making the game unplayable. When people use this term “unplayable” is it primarily describing their connection which is making it unplayable or the state of the game itself?
I’m lucky in regards to my connection, I rarely have any issues and the game is on the most part “smooth” and responsive. And I’ve actually enjoyed the games I’ve been playing. The passing is definitely better than last year, as is the shooting. But surely if so many people are complaining about the game , there has to be a divide and a reasoning for it somewhere?
A part of me thinks that this reasoning is due to the fact that many players spend most of their time on UT and rarely explore other modes, so the game becomes mundane and frustrating to play. I am currently playing on average 15 Rivals games a week on top of Champs and whilst there are moments where I think Jesus Christ what just happened, for the most part the football I’m able to play is satisfying at least for my eyes. I know this isn’t the case across the player base.
Genuinely intrigued about what people think of this

Edit: I want y'all's answers not a link... But if y'all can't answer it feels free to send a link :)
Possibly more or probably the same as I do now! If I did leave and forget about god after getting good with him that means I didn't correct? (Didn't get good with him)
Also how will I know if I got good with god Jesus and the holy spirit and if I'm a believer?
Also I'm 17m I'm Chinese plus Lebanese grew up Muslim changes to Christianity two months ago. My dad is Lebanese and mum Chinese. Also got one brother that isn't religious but believes in god idk which one he believes in but knowing him he'd just say "god" in a weird and funny voice and not say which one.
I love talking to him in my head, even though I can't hear him I pretend that he talks back and make up scenarios to if he's talking to me even when it seems like I'm not. Is this good or bad start?
I live in a Muslim household but I can't tell my parents I converted because they will beat and probably disown me. I'm not denying Jesus because they have never asked me so don't use the Matthew quote.
I haven't got baptised BC I can't BC again read before and I do plan to and also to go church when I move out
I pray to God and like idk 80% I praise God and I say how I love God Jesus and holy spirit equally and the 20% I just ask for "small things" nothing too big. Good or bad
I sometimes ask him to show me a sign because it's instinct even though I believe and have faith that he exists. And he's given me signs he exists. Good or bad? Edit: I now know it's bad and I'm trying to stop asking for signs and just use faith :)
I love talking to myself hoping Jesus would talk to me because I wanna show how much I love him. Good or bad
Suddenly today I told Jesus in my head I wanna talk to him about him because I wanna get to know him more, good or bad?
I'm trying to stop using gods name in vein BC I used to and I used to intentionally say it everyday but now I say oh gosh or oh my gosh Instead of saying god I only use it on vein in accident or when I get angry but I'm trying to stop. Good or bad?
Despite the temptations going back to Islam I stay with Jesus now as I type this I'm telling myself Jesus is our only Lord and saviour I love you amen! Good or bad?
Does anyone know how Jesus will feel if I add him into a football game and in every game I can add him? I wanna add him as the best player in a game called football manager 2024 and I wanna shape my south park character around him! (As in how he looks) This is two of many ways I wanna show my appreciation from him! Will he care if I add him, the father or the holy spirit? And if so does he have a preference on who I should add?
God said be patient with all things i think and I'm trying my best and I've been slightly more patient (I think) good or bad?
I've also prayed that all non believers including my parents and enemies and family and EVERYONE will turn to Christ and become believers! Good or bad
I also forgived my enemies (in the same prayer I said before) good or bad?
I also wanna point out when I think of the holy trinity entirely or an individual (god / the father, Jesus / the son, or the holy spirit) I feel joy! And when I wanna speak and I do I feel joy! Why is it?
Whenever I feel excited or happy is it the holy spirit?
And if the holy spirit enters me which idk if it has yet will it ever leave me? (knowing I'm staying here and loving the trinity forever)
and also assuming i leave Jesus and christianity which ps I promise I NEVER will leave Jesus and Christianity, is that the only time he'd leave someone's body?
I read the bible almost everyday I forget to sometimes but I want to read it everyday to honor god and to get to know him more but I forget. Is it the devil's doing?
I ask god to come in my dreams or talk to me in my head so we can have a good chat (and a funny one) all about getting to know him, will he EVER do this or nope?
I made a YouTube channel to convert and to honor Jesus god and the holy spirit and a tiny bit of me for moment but mostly the first reason I mentioned. Good or bad?
Also a month ago, a month into when I joined it was originally I joined because I 99% feared god but now it's.more like 70% I want a relationship with the holy trinity and 30% scared. I'm trying to make it 100% want a relationship which I really want to do with the holy trinity! Good or bad?
Is it bad or good I want the best ever relationship with Jesus, god aka the father, and the holy spirit or does it only have to be with god and / or Jesus? Or does Jesus want us to have a relationship with him his father and the holy spirit
My brother keeps saying the n word even tho we're not black and I'm trying to get him to stop. Good or bad?
And last one might add more but I tell god Jesus and the holy spirit I love them equally (maybe the father a tiny bit more he created everything including the holy spirit and Jesus) for what they done saying like Jesus thank you for dying for my sins (forgetting to say our but I meant everyone's sins), thank you god for being there I equally love you and thank you for creating my and everything without you i wouldn't be here I love you (something on those lines) and finally the holy spirit I said I love you without you I wouldn't be as excited and happy I love you and I forgot to say amen so I'll say it now! Amen!
Just prayed to God that he'll help me with my swearing problems, is swearing a sin? Also does crap and darn and dammit count as swearing? Is the s word one too? (Like instead of saying poop)
Is it bad and annoying I consistently say I love God his son Jesus and the holy spirit? I feel like I'm being annoying and saying it too often...
Also how will I tell if I became good with god?
I'm also learning to control my anger and fight the devil mentally
I've committed sins like mastirbation but I've prayed to God to forgive me and help me defeat the devil and all Sins he gives me.
Why have I felt happier in 2 months with Christ than the past 17 years with Islam? Is this gods way of saying he's happy and I made the right choice?
Also is it a sin or is it good if I say god bless you to anyone including Christians after I say smth here like on Reddit (saying like god bless yall) or when someone sneezes
Why do I feel a sudden jolt of joy whenever I sing and praise God in it? I was in the bathroom doing a number two and suddenly I just sang a song but changed it to praising the holy trinity and I randomly made up a 3 ish second song. Good or bad
And also pray that I stop having doubts on which religion to choose I now only believe in Jesus Christ. Praying for all y'all who have bad days and lives!
Also does the holy spirit have feelings and can speak like the father and Jesus? Again I'll add more if I got more. May God bless all of y'all! Also I know the father Jesus and holy spirit will see this but just know I love y'all and forever will