So I have a new buddy here with me, a rescue 6mo kitten and he's super cool, only been five days so far and he's now comfortable with the house and the dog (both now showing mutual interest and sharing respectful nose boops). Outside soon, but not yet...
Anyways, one thing he's done is heavily imprinted on me, likely as I've been here almost 24/7 and am his primary feeder, strokes provider, play friend and 'safe zone' (I'd keep the dog away when he was showing too much interest too early).
When I'm at work on the computer I've set up a nice bed for him close by so after he's done typing my emails for me in the morning he's got a place to rest. Here's the thing... whenever I get up to make a coffee or whatever, he will follow within 30seconds. I'm not against it at all, it's cute, but I cant help wonder if I could just communicate with him that I was going to be back very soon and that he didn't need to get up from what looks like a very comfy slumber.
Not sure what's going on in his little cat mind. 'shit, safety has gone!' 'why does he keep going? why!' 'no idea where he's going, best find out', unlikely but maybe: 'dude cant look after himself! best go check it's ok!' (more a dog thing there). I don't think it's motivated by hunger.
I cold just ignore it, but that's not how my mind works .. I'm interested to hear any insight.

CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
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I’m having a mixed baby and desperately need help with names 😫 I’m having a boy and boy names are extremely hard honestly.. i don’t want anything basic. My friend is having a mixed baby and naming him zikaya which is super cute. please please please comment some ideas or suggestions! only name i thought of so far that i liked is aries but honestly dont think i will use that. thank you in advance :)

Sorry this might be a little long. I tried to be as detailed as possible!
Hello! I am 20 years old and a female. I’m not very big on socializing and tend to be pretty introverted, not because I hate people but because it usually is exhausting for me. I try to look out for people and don’t like to tell anyone about my problems or feelings; I am also someone who cares a lot about people but doesn’t normally voice it, but would rather show it through gifts or acts of service. I like to pay attention to the details of things and people, and I often have a weird feeling that I can “predict” people or know how they will be/are… and so far, I’ve usually been right. I have a strong moral code and will always advocate for the underdog. I think deeply about things and tend to have a lot of empathy. I experience things and feel that I also think of things differently than most people. I have a hard time explaining my thoughts, but I’ll do my best!
I don’t have any kind of mental diagnosis that could affect my mental stability.
My upbringing was actually very positive. My family has been big on religion since I was born, but it’s something that I take comfort in and agree with. It brings purpose to my life and helps me to be the person I am. I have two parents who love me and take care of me, and younger siblings that I love dearly. I have cousins who double as my friends, aunts and uncles who have me over all the time, and grandparents that I love so, so much. Having many younger siblings did tend to get lonely at times, especially when they were younger, but it taught me independence and I do my best to take care of them. I count myself as extremely fortunate to have such wonderful people in my life.
As a job, I currently work as a barista. To be honest, I don’t really like it very much. My coworkers are very nice and I get along well with them, and I also like a lot of our regular customers, but my manager makes it a very toxic and negative environment that simply goes against my moral code. I also dislike the fact that most people that I see, I only see them in passing. I’d rather have few deep, meaningful connections that many shallow connections, if that makes any sense? I do enjoy the idea of getting to make people’s days, and I like to encourage the bashful people and love seeing sweet children, too! Both customers and coworkers tend to tell me personal stories, and I really enjoy getting to know them truly and seeing what makes them the way they are. I also tend to think sometimes that I feel a higher calling. I want to be somewhere truly helping people. I feel that I need to make a difference and positively influence people.
Spending an entire weekend by myself would be nice. I don’t NEED human contact, and can generally entertain myself without becoming bored. I do, however, find it a little depressing when it’s TOO quiet, especially since I grew up with my environment being everything but quiet. Normally, I like being near people, especially if I’m not even talking to them. Just sharing the space with someone is comforting enough for me! Overall, though, I do need to be alone frequently and tend to run away from life sometimes throughout the day. I would probably find a weekend alone to be really refreshing, so I could connect with myself and not other people.
I prefer activities where you work alone. I like to bake a lot, especially because it makes me happy when people enjoy the things I’ve made! I greatly enjoy sharing my food. I also like to read and can also write, as they both provide me with the an escape from reality at times. My favorite parts about both is understanding and connecting with the characters in the stories. If I have a favorite character, I like to think about what they think about and how they interact with the world. I feel like it’s something most people would find mundane, but I could do it all day! I enjoy being outdoors and connecting with nature, but I don’t particularly enjoy sports.
I tend to be very curious about many things. I like to know how people work. Not normally objects, but people. I find psychology to be extremely interesting, and could spend hours watching true crime investigations. If I see a stray cat, I wonder how it feels and what it has experienced. When I see a person who is upset, I wonder what happened to cause it and how I can help. I can normally tell quickly when something is wrong, and I am usually good at figuring out what I can do to help and am able to read people to understand the best ways to comfort them. It makes sense thinking that in my head, but writing it down sure makes it seem confusing!
Taking a leadership position is not my preferred route. If it falls down to me, I certainly would try hard to make sure the people working under me are happy. I’d rather make the people around my happy than the company itself. I’d like to be an advocate for their rights and happiness if anything was unfair, and I would like for us to be a “team” rather than simply a workplace. I’d like everyone to have fun at work and feel like friends and family. I know the world doesn’t work that way, but I can certainly dream, right?
In terms of coordination, I feel that I’m in the middle. I’d rather play video games than any kind of sport. I don’t have the best balance or coordination, and I don’t typically do things that involve having a good sense of either.
I feel that I am typically artistic, and have a great appreciation for art. I’m not great at drawing, but I like to write a lot. I also think it feels nice to express yourself through music. I’ve done pottery and would like to start learning to crochet. I enjoy looking at certain arts, such as music and books. My favorite art in terms of drawing is abstract art. I love thinking of the endless possibilities of what it could mean, and also wonder how the artist felt when drawing the piece.
The past doesn’t typically have meaning to me. I can be sentimental about certain things at times, but I typically focus my energy mostly on the future. I do things in my present life to prepare for the future, and I have a positive outlook on the future. I don’t like to think of the things that I find unpleasant now, because I believe in a good, happy future where the things that currently bother me will no longer be able to affect me.
I typically will jump at the opportunity to help someone, especially if they are in my family. I do my best to make people’s days, and I try to be of service as best as I can. I used to be unable to say “no”, but I have since learned to enforce boundaries and would never do something that goes against my moral code. If I have a lot on my plate and someone asks me to do something for them, I will typically tell them that I will help them when I can or if I have the time.
Logical consistency is something that I find important, but I wouldn’t mind making exceptions for certain things. I take comfort in knowing that certain outcomes will always remain the same, as I get nervous sometimes when things are unknown. Since I normally can predict what will happen with certain people or events based on prior experience, I find it both interesting and disturbing when the outcome is different.
Efficiency and productivity are not my top priorities, but I do find them important. I like to be efficient in the things I do, but I will not go out of my way to find the “best” way to do something. I like to stay a little productive so that I don’t feel as if I haven’t done anything, but I am perfectly fine with sitting around doing nothing, too. It’s peaceful. I don’t like being in a rush.
Controlling others is something I never do on purpose, but I will admit I can manipulate sometimes. I would never negatively impact someone on purpose, but I am able to manipulate a situation if I find something to be unfair. I’m especially able to do this with the way my mind sees connections between people and things, as well as the way I see into other people’s minds and understand their feelings and actions. It sounds scary but I promise, I mean no harm! :)
Hobbies I enjoy include baking, playing video games, watching videos, writing/reading, and just being around people! I like to share the things I bake, and video games are fun because I can enjoy them alone or with my family. Playing games and watching videos, whether alone or with others, is fun and stimulating for my brain in all the right ways! I much prefer to write over speak, as I feel I can convey things better and express myself through writing. Reading allows me to look into the minds of other people and I think it’s just so fun.
Learning environments are something I normally can adapt to. Whether a teacher is strict or laid back, I am normally able to perform the same way. I can understand each side and typically earn the favor of teachers no matter their teaching styles. I tend to thrive better in environments where things are on a straight path, but I do like to express myself through various pieces of writing when possible.
When I have a project, I would much prefer to start it quickly and finish it as soon as possible. I don’t typically “wing” anything, although I won’t be torn up if something doesn’t go exactly according to plan. I’d rather break things up into manageable tasks and prefer to work alone. I strategize pretty well, but for the most part, I use the strategy as a guideline and like to be creative here and there.
My aspirations are to connect with and help people. I feel a calling to do something and be somewhere that I can help people and understand them. I want to make a difference. I want to be a part of people’s passions and learn their dreams. I want to know the mundane things about them. I want to learn, but I mainly want to help.
I fear being left and not needed. I also fear being taken advantage of and manipulated. I feel that I need to work hard in order to compensate for these things. I also greatly fear having no one to turn to. Being alone is nice, but being lonely is my worst nightmare.
The highs in my life are when I can be around people who don’t drain me. That good feeling after someone tells you you’ve made their day. That feeling you get after you and your family beat the level of the game you’ve been working hard at. The feeling after you look around at your clean room. The feeling after you finally quit that toxic job, or the feeling after someone eats the food you’ve made them. For me, all of those things paired with thinking about and understanding someone’s thoughts and intentions make me happy. They stimulate my brain, and give me that “AHA!” moment.
Lows in my life typically include feeling helpless. I hate when you don’t know how to assist someone, or when all you can do is sit with them. I also hate when people are cruel for no reason. I advocate for justice according to my moral code and I stand up for people as well as what I feel is right. I hate when I think I could have done something better. When I’m upset, I become pessimistic and tend to isolate myself. I hate being stuck with individuals who are unfeeling, uncaring, or narcissistic.
I tend to daydream more than I partake in reality. I have a hard time focusing on what is in front of me, and I like to think more on the hypotheticals. I daydream and think in order to gain a deeper understanding of the world around me, but it causes me to miss some of the simple things right in front of me.
Being alone in a blank, empty room would cause me to think about a lot of things. I would probably think of how to improve myself. I might think of birthday gifts for people, or the next thing I want to cook. I could think of nostalgic things, or the problems I am currently facing in my life. I think I would mostly think on self improvement and the interactions I’ve seen between people.
Making decisions is sometimes hard for me. I normally will go with what my gut tells me, unless there is an obvious logical choice. I tend to be indecisive sometimes, and like to make decisions quickly so I don’t have to think about them anymore. I don’t normally second guess decisions I’ve made.
Emotions are a big part of my life. I like to understand people’s thoughts and feelings, sometimes to the point where I will neglect my own. My own emotions can take me time to understand, but I can read most other people easily. I base my responses to things on how others are feeling.
Agreeing with others just to keep a conversation going is something that I find untruthful. If something goes against my personal moral code, I will either leave or change the subject. I will always kindly stand up for what I believe to be right. I tend to choose my battles, but I will never agree with something that I don’t believe in my heart.
Rules, to me, are made to be followed. Sometimes, I don’t mind bending them a little bit, but I do feel that most people should follow rules the majority of the time. I feel that rules keep things in order and are an important structure in certain places and environments.

Alright so I have a 500 dollar gift card for my birthday from gf, but I don't want or need anything from Best Buy. Can you help me think of something I can purchase that's not too much money lost when flipping?
.. I'd rather use the money towards acar payment 😂 (getting old and more worried about responsibilities lmao)
Thanks for any ideas 💡

so i’m filling up new crest. i’m only using victorian-esque houses. right now i have 5 houses accounted for. an elder woman, a couple with 2 kids, 2 single young ladies who are neighbors, and a single man with a cat. i’m also planning to make a cute elderly couple. i’m having such trouble thinking of what to do. i want it to be a gilmore girls meets desperate housewives but i’m running out of ideas for people. this neighborhood is beginning to look too good to be true. so i’m asking for drama ideas. i also plan on making the neighborhood harlot ofc. i play on playstation so no mods :( gotta make up the lore myself lol

I am back with another review for my holy grail - the AB lip balm-again, it’s gonna be a long post.
As I have mentioned again and again, the AB balm is the one to rule them all. It moisturizes, it removes my lip peeling, and prevents future peeling. It has a heavenly texture, and no matter how much you apply it to your lips, there is no pilling or white cast even after rubbing your lips together. Don’t get me started with how it feels on your lips, my lips feel sooooo pillowy (not sure if that’s a word). This has also been the first winter that my lips have not cracked or been painful dry…and it is this beautiful texture that is its downfall.
I was very excited when I found out that Augustinus Bader was coming with a color version of this lip balm with a collaboration with Sofia Coppola . It’s no exaggeration that I’ve been through at least 15 tubes of this lip balm. I keep one accesible at all time (purse, desk, by my bed, etc) … that’s how much I like it.
The version comes with a very cute colored strip at the base of the tube and colored logo at the top. On the inside of the tube, the letters are also highlighted with color. The change is minimal, but meshes well. Whoever was in charge, did a good job.
The AB balm texture continues to be its original buttery, and light formula. For reference, I chose the shade #1. Now, if you’ve ever used watery lip tints, you’ll know that they will settle into dry spots. For me it makes those dry spots a shade darker and make my lips overall, blotchy. Some also settle into your lip lines if you don’t blot them with your finger. This is exactly what the AB tinted balm does, it’s just that in this instance, it is its amazing formula that works against it. The color settles immediately on my lip lines, it is not a smooth even application of color that a lip stain like a Rare Beauty Lip Oil would give you . It also leave (hopefully this makes sense) an outline of color where the rounded edge of the lip balm touches my lip. Meaning that it leaves patches of colored lines on the outline of my lips. I’m disappointed, so disappointed. I REALLY REALLY wanted to love it, but I can’t…the only way to salvage it is to even it out with my fingers, but that defeats the purpose of an easy, no mirror application. If you are not careful with its application, you’ll look like a baby that’s learning how to eat and has food all around their lips after slurping spaghetti!!!
Now, this tinted balm did give me an idea. I felt that its texture would mesh well with a tint or stain. I have a lot of leftover AB tubes. I save them, scrape the leftovers at the bottom of the tube, melt and fill a little pot with it.
This time around, I dug through my lippies and chose my Cha Cha Benefit tint in “mango”. I melted all my lip balm leftover on a wax burner. I (generously, but did not measure it) poured the lip tint in the melted lip balm. This made the AB melted lip balm solidify a bit, but as soon as it warmed again, it melted and after stirring it, it combined beautifully. I did noticed that it solidified easily as soon as I pulled it away from the wax burner and so I had to work fast…and Voila!!! It turned soooooo goood! My hunch was right and my little experiment worked!
As soon as the leftovers from the pot I melted the lip balm on solidified, I tried it on. Guys, the melting process did not destroy its original texture (although I have yet to see how this mixture will work in a lip tube form). The color spreads smooth on my lips, no blotching or settling on my imperfections or dry lips, and with the cute color payoff!
So, with little extra work, I came with the best of both worlds! My favorite of all time lip balm, but with a “personal improvement”.
I do hope that in the future, Augustinus Bader will come with a similar product… and as soon as that happens, I will be getting my hand on them too!

So, I've kind of posted about this in other threads, specifically on askreddit, but by some users request, I will do my best to fully relay this entire tale up to the current point, as well as provide as much context I am able (and will provide missing context if asked in comments).
TL;DR
A friend of mine of 4 years drank himself into liver failure and his wife cheated on him, so I offered him a free room to try and put his life back together, and I was repaid for the thought with a divorce of my own, but honestly, it's probably not that bad.
Part 1: CONTEXT
Me and my wife have been together since early 2014, and married in late 2017. We have been through much together, including two extended deployments, one of which was 10 and a half months long. We have traveled the world together, lived on both coasts of the US, and despite much of our struggles and how things eventually went down, I was always convinced we would work as a team to overcome any issues.
The friend in question was, largely, an online friend. We met playing an MMO during covid and we quickly formed a very tight knit, but small, community that were very close that included me, my wife, my friend, his wife, and 4 other friends. Covid was a wild time and I was surprised how easy it was to form friends in this group and we kept in touch, as a whole, even once quarantine had ended and most of us had moved on from that particular game. This was a group that, while it started online, we have met most of these people several times IRL and had vacations to spend time together and just hang out.
Part 2: His Problems
Fast forward to about January of 2024. My buddy, from here on out I will refer to as Z (and for a quick add, I will refer to my wife as D), contacts us to tell us his condition is dire and he has been diagnosed with stage 4 cirrhosis of the liver as a consequence of his extensive drinking. Shaken, we quickly charter a flight out to visit. Within a week, we're staying with him and his wife and his roommate and a couple members of his family who are taking care of him. This man is bloated, yellow, and probably about 350lbs now. We are worried, but stay supportive and positive that help can be found, especially since he seems keen on changing his lifestyle for the better. Some of his family start a gofundme that we donate to, and many of the people in our gaming circle who have grown close also donate several thousand dollars (One member of our raid team donated 10k. You never know who is stealth rich on the internet I guess). Me and several other friends discuss the possibilities of helping him get on disability and even getting ourselves tested as compatible living donors. Sad, but hopeful, we depart about a week later, and stay in constant touch.
About a month later, I'm getting a call from one of our mutuals letting me know that "Hey, so I may have goofed up." and tells me how Z's wife had visited him and had a 3 way with him and his wife. I am obviously irate at this and turn to back Z up with comments like "So much for in sickness and in health, huh?" I do what I can to stay supportive, and my wife, D, also makes it a point to stay in touch with him as he has found himself banished to the couch of his apartment. Not even allowed to sleep in his own bed and frequently uncomfortable even being in his bedroom to use the PC.
I'm not particularly rich, but I am not poor either. I served in the military and have a high VA rating which means a constant income and have a steady job and a couple side gigs that pay well enough. My love language, in many ways, is gift giving. I pride myself on being able to pick a good gift, even if it's a little early for an occasion such as a bday or christmas, and will often pull the trigger on something if it means a lot or I think it will help. In this case, my brother was selling an old steam deck because he wanted a new OLED model, so I figured "two birds, one stone", and buy the steam deck off him and send it to Z so we can still game together.
In the intervening months, Z and D start playing games that I have no interest in (Disney Dreamlight Valley), but I am happy to play other games and hang out and chat. Really, nothing seems amiss, but since his banishment, me and my wife are both pushing for him to come and take up the spare bedroom we have in our home. Soon enough, I buy him a plane ticket and he arrives with little more than the clothes on his back and we take him in, no cost other than the expectation that he might help around the house a bit (he was a chef, so having a cook and someone to help clean was ideal for me who often did not have the time or energy to handle these tasks as thoroughly as I would like).
Part 3: The Incident
Now, I am skipping ahead a little bit here, but there's not much to be said about the time between. My wife worked part time hours, and when she did go to work, she'd have him tag along just so he wouldn't "Sit and stew with bad thoughts" at the house alone. I will admit that throughout this entire ordeal, I have had several, several times where my brain tried to warn me, but I ignored ALL of those signs because I trusted him, but more importantly, I trusted her with my life.
One new, frequent argument I found myself having with her was she would fall asleep on the couch, and when I finally tried to go to bed, I'd do my best to wake her and drag her upstairs. These became extremely frequent occurrences and I expressed to her how frustrated I was that I had to fight with her just to come to bed so we could sleep (mind you, this is not even about sex. Often I'm taking her to bed at like, 1am and I work at 7, so I really just wanted her to be sleeping in the bed). Hell, one time, I started catching the vibes that the longer I sat and waited for her to be ready to go upstairs, she just never would be, because they were waiting for me to leave so they could talk in hushed tones. On THAT particular night, I went upstairs alone with her finally awake, and she did not join me for another half hour.
Finally, the day arrives. Its Sunday. We are all downstairs hanging out. One of their newest habits I can't really stand but just dealt with is that she'd sit and crochet while he doomscrolled or strummed on a guitar I bought him and listen to music videos on youtube endlessly. Eventually, I grow weary and give my wife a kiss and tell her I'm gonna go upstairs and play some GW2 for a bit.
About an hour passes, and she enters the game room and tells me "I am uncomfortable. I really need to talk to you. Oh, you're dying!" (As she entered the room, I immediately turn face to talk to her and disregard the game, but she decided that my Charr was more important that what was about to happen, so she of course warns me.) We step into the bedroom and close the door.
"You're going to hate me," she says through tears, "me and Z kissed!" At this point, my brain short circuits and I recall one of my first thoughts being "Oh lord, here we go." and just a general desire to not be a part of this conversation. Shock sets in almost immediately. Still with a healthy dose of denial, I talk to her about what had happened and told her that it needed to end. Even at this point, I did not want to send this man home. Was it shock? Denial? Probably a mixture of the two, or some other additional emotional responses. She gets up after some discussion and goes downstairs, promising to shut him down, but comes back about 15 minutes later sobbing "I couldn't do it! I couldn't end it..." (Side note: In my confused haze of a mind, I feel personally threatened, and after she leaves the bedroom, I lock the door and grab a metal water cub I keep at my side and prepare to actually fight if it comes to it, but once she returns, I back off that idea again.)
Talking with her more, I present her with two options; Couple's therapy, or divorce. BOTH of these options are world ending to her, and she even goes so far as to suggest that just because I said the "D word" that it was what I wanted, which was objectively untrue. We talk back and forth about things I don't quite recall at this point, aside from one point where she comes back and locks herself in the master bath and tells me to call 911, she doesn't care, because she's going to take a bunch of pills, but after a couple of hours, Z shows up to the door and knocks and asks if he can come in. I tell him he may enter, and we talk for a bit. After about 5ish minutes, we decide to go downstairs to the living room and continue the discussion.
Once I sit down on the sofa, I immediately feel like I'm being positioned as the bad guy. I'm in the corner of our sectional, and she's on my left, he's on my right. She tells him "He said it's either a divorce or couple's therapy." "Oh, so he gave you an ultimatum?" I continue to argue that yes, those are the two only options. Z tells me "You're not being fair to her emotions. She is telling you there is another option." I am thoroughly baffled at this statement.
D: I didn't think it was possible and I didn't mean for it to happen, but I have fallen in love with another man. My heart has room for two. I truly have two soulmates. I have never been happier than sleeping on the couch next to my two boys.
Z: There is no reason you guys can't stay married, and we can explore what we've found. I mean, look at how happy she has been since I have been here!
Sick to my stomach, I get up to go vomit in the toilet. Now, I wore a silicone wedding ring, and often find even with a hand wash, a little water tends to get trapped under it. After I finish and wash myself up, I come back and am playing with my ring to dry it. She sees this as a sign that I am uncomfortable again wearing my ring, and takes off her ring as I sit back down and hands me her wedding ring.
Me: Uh, excuse me?
D: This is what you want, I can tell.
Me: No? I was washing my hands and water gets stuck under my ring...
D: Oh... I thought... okay. (And she takes back her ring from me)
I tell her, very clearly, the options are to either end things with him, or end things with me. At this point, I'm still in shock, but sober in mind enough to decide that this is not worth fighting over. I will not argue with my own wife my merits or why she shouldn't just pack up and leave with a jobless, now essentially homeless man, and if she cannot figure that out herself then I will eventually move on.
Crying, sobbing, she sits down in front of him and says, "I'm so sorry, I fought for you. I really did. I told you I'd fight for you and I failed. I loved being your girlfriend, but I need to be a good wife and stay."
Z says "Alright." and starts to go gather his things to leave. As he does, she grabs him and says "No, wait! Please don't go. I don't know what I want."
Z: Ok, well if we're getting all this out in the open, I want to say this. I love this girl. I love her with my whole heart, and without her, life is not worth living. I will not leave this house if you (me) tell me to. Only her. You are taking this very well right now, I can tell you want to hit me (Still in shock, no, I can genuinely say that emotion or thought had not actually registered outside of the event upstairs earlier), but this is my stand.
D: OP, we had a good run. I'm sorry.
And with that, I get up and go to get my sandals and leave the house to get some air. As I try to go, she runs to the door and he follows her. She pushes the door closed and says "No wait, please!"
Me: No, this is the deal. I'm going out to get some fresh air. I am not threatening self harm to "win you back".
D: Will you be back?
Me: I don't know.
Z: Man, I'm telling you, you don't understand, you think I am your enemy, but I am not.
And with that, I leave and shut the door.
In the about, hour, I am gone, I drive around near the house and I call my supervisor who I have a very good relationship with (and I did not want to involve direct friends or family yet because I'm afraid it's too early to start spreading this news). I go over to her house nearby and we chat shortly. After our talk, I have at least something of a clear head and go home, with words for both of them.
As I arrive home, there is no one downstairs. I go upstairs. His door is closed. I knock on the door.
Z: Uh, one second.
I wait for about 5 agonizing seconds, but I refuse to be shut out of rooms in my own home and open the door. He is shirtless, and she is hiding in the corner just out of sight of me. I look him in the eye.
Me: Really?
Z: Yep.
Me: Get out of my house.
And with that, they both silently pack their things and leave.
The second I hear the front door close, I start calling people. I am not above pettiness, and the first person I call is her mom, whom I have a good relationship with. She is SHAKEN and immediately calls her. (I find out later that it was a particularly harsh verbal beating by her, but it really doesn't change anything.)
When I come downstairs to check the state of the house, I see her wedding ring on the counter. I call out of work the next day and lay down and hope I die.
Part 4: Her Problems
So, there is some additional context that I did not add in part 1 because a lot of it is red flags I ignored over the course of our relationship that, in the days following, started to become more and more obvious. There are many that I spent much effort playing off or covering her for, but I will try to briefly list much of what I see as glaring issues in the relationship that were never remedied.
This woman is 30 years old and cannot drive. She can drive and HAS driven my vehicle at the start of the relationship (albeit illegally), but after one tiny little accident where she hit a pole and knocked my side mirror off (which she paid for and fixed before telling me, it really wasn't a big deal. I was on deployment), she never drove again. Attempts to get her behind the wheel would end very quickly after they started, and the conditions to get her in the seat were often extremely time limited, scheduled, or something would come up, and every time I told her "okay, this month we're getting your license for sure" it just wouldn't happen and I'd end up feeling like the one who was at fault.
She does not have her Bachelor's degree because she did not turn in her final project for one single class. Not only that, but she has never truly pursued a career with the things she learned from the coursework, or even used her AA.
For half of the relationship, she did not work at all. When she did, it was often part time work, and if she was saddled with full time hours or, god forbid, overtime, it was a world-ending affair. She would come home and constantly be tired from her few hours at work and would do little more than sit around and crochet.
Our agreement when we bought our house was that she was going to work full time and we were going to split household duties, but I would definitely scoop the cat box because she was allergic (but she wanted cats) and wash dishes (because she hated them), and she would do laundry (because I hated it). In practice, all her version of laundry turned out to be was to throw loads in when one of us was out of clothes and just hit wash and then rotate, and then leave all the clothes in a pile on the bed. EVERYONE KNOWS folding the laundry is the worst part! Come on! Men's clothes are easy! I don't wear that much! (When we would fold, I often finished in a third of her time and would just hang out and chat until she was done)
Ultimately, this meant that for many years now, she was working barely more than part time if she was working at all, and would sort-of do laundry. Meanwhile, I am scooping litter, folding laundry, doing dishes, doing all related yard work, doing all the household cleaning, handling all the finances, I did MOST of the cooking, and all of the grocery shopping (often going alone), driving her from work if I could (she'd uber it if not) and picking her up and driving her home, as well as just generally being a chauffeur for her for 10 years, while working a full time job and a side gig online. Many nights I'd have to stop what I was doing to pick her up at closing hours, and then would sit in the parking lot for 30 minutes while she did tasks like vacuum her little crystal shop that she definitely could have done before close so I didn't end up waiting so damn long. Then we'd come home hang out and eat while we watched TV, and then if I wanted to try and go upstairs to do another hobby, I'd be silently guilted about it because she wanted to sit on the couch and crochet.
Part 5: My Problems
I am not perfect, and admit I have flaws. One of her favorite things to claim to our friends now is that I was "emotionally neglectful", and if there is truth to it, I think I can pin down the day. Before I started working full time again, I was going to school on the 9/11 GI bill. I was not a good student in my younger years, but in time, I have become rather good at school. My first two semesters back I easily maintained a 4.0 GPA. Over the summer in 2022, I, woefully, decided to take a Calc 2 class online because I could not find one in person and wanted to be ready for Calc 3 in the Fall to fill a prereq for my bachelor's, and I really liked the instructor for that Calc 3 class. This calc 2 class was painful. The instructor had clearly recorded all his lectures during Covid and we were simply given the full course of videos and given work assignments and said "Email me if you have questions." This is not how I learn, but I figured, hey, it's one class. I'm working again, but one class isn't a huge deal. I can knock this out.
I was wrong.
After the second exam, I had a low C in the class and I knew I couldn't keep up. I withdrew from the class feeling no other option. I tend to be pretty good at math, and ultimately my dream was to work with 3d printing on an industrial scale with a Mechanical Engineering degree- and if that failed I had my military history (which is engineering relevant) and a degree to fall back on and work should come easily. After clicking that withdraw button, I saw those dreams vaporize. After that, I threw myself into my government civilian job full time and slowly fell into depression. By the end of our relationship, with the toll of doing 99% of the work around the house and for her and with my dreams dead and buried, at age 33, I would wake up and pray I died. I would never kill myself, but I wanted to just die. I felt backed into a corner. I still did everything I could to support her and hoped that one day, she would pick up some of the load and maybe, just maybe, I could go back, but that day did not come (At least not in the way I expected).
Part 6: The Aftermath
This post is already too long, and if I include every single detail that has come to light since, I might actually hit the post cap, but I will go over at least some of it here.
I have had my friends come out in droves. Both of them have been effectively exiled, at least from what I can see, from every friend circle we have. After a couple of days, they flew back to live with, I guess, his parents in Vegas while they sorted shit out, because after I spoke with Z's previous roommate, he adamantly explained he was tired of all the "fucking drama" that Z had been bringing into the house and was just done with it.
I have spoken with many, many people and gotten even more context and even receipts of some of each of their conversations to our mutual friends, and some of the shit I read is just hilarious. He is "not ashamed of pursuing happiness, he is just sad that people got hurt". She is "coming to terms with emotional neglect and felt trapped, but now, yes now, she is free."
I got my neighbors to watch the cats, and took my dog up to visit my closest friend of 20 years and spent about a week and a half drinking, smoking, and talking about all this while surrounded by some of the most beautiful nature the US has to offer. Truly, without this man, I don't think I'd have gotten this far as quickly as I have. He really has been a lifesaver and I truly, to my dying day, will always appreciate him.
Paperwork has been filed, we wish to remain on good terms, and one day I still do hope I can be a friend to her, but she is woefully immature and incapable of adequately performing in an adult society. I have quit my job and am returning to school with a much lighter budget and will be getting that degree I desperately need.
It's been hard, real hard. I have put every ounce of my being into this relationship, and I truly felt like she was part of me, and nothing like this could ever happen. But it's that trust that allowed this to happen. I do not hate her, I'm just disappointed. I will pick up my pieces and, hopefully, find myself whole again soon.
Part 7: Rambling anecdotes
These are some stories I wanted to include in the previous body of text but didn't feel like it kept the same flow (if there even is any at all, I'm not proofreading this). If I remember any others after I post, Ill just toss them in the comments.
Early after Z came to live with us, my mother came to the house to drop off a package. I am pretty sure I was at work, but when my mother came to the door, both of them answered the door and the way my mom describes it "First of all, do you answer the door at your friends house? Also, the way he hovered over her made me uncomfortable. They were in the doorway and he was right up behind her poking his head out." She said my wife had told her that I was feeling unwell and was upstairs sleeping. I can't even be sure at this point.
Shortly before all the things happened, my parents were going out of town to celebrate their own anniversary, and I had agreed to dog-sit their 5 month old puppy (who, while cute, has WAY too much energy and was EXTREMELY difficult to handle, and I have raised several dogs at this point). We met up and took the dog, and then ALL of us (including Z) went to dinner. At dinner, my mother looked at my wife and asked, directly "And so how long have you been married? 6, almost 7 years? Well at least you missed that 7 year itch, huh" and my wife shortly followed with a comment about how she was not hungry and did not eat dinner that night.
All of this happened WHILE THIS CRAZY PUPPY was running around the house, and part of me thinks he pushed this to happen when it did because he could not stand having to help take care of this dog any longer (2 days).
About a week after all this happened, my wife did not text or call me, or respond to any messages or emails I sent her (I didn't send many, but they exist). Frustrated, I text her and tell her I need to talk to her about logistics moving forward, specifically about her belongings. She told me "I will talk to you when I am ready." We did not talk for another week. Also, she told me to stop talking to her mom. (I have a good relationship with both of my in-laws and while her step-father tried to remain impartial to the best of his abilities, he gave me some of the best advice I could possibly have gotten at that time, mostly about how to move forward and cope, as he has personally dealt with this with smaller relationships 3 separate times in his life which he gave me details on, and we are still on good terms.)
Their favorite TV show to watch together was Outlander, which, if you aren't aware, is basically a story about a woman who time travels and has two men in her life.
One of our biggest constant points of contention was my friendship with an old high school buddy (who I spent much of the time in the aftermath hanging out with while healing). We believe, with good reason, that she hated this man because after I had almost been hospitalized for psych reasons due to stress, he had told me I needed to talk to her about working again and doing more to help around the house. She figured out, obviously, who was telling me to say these things, and sent a very, very angry text to his wife. They all apparently made up, but I know she never let that grudge go.
One of the fairly recent hobbies I got into was D&D. It seemed like a good fit for all of us. She loved fantasy and gaming, I enjoyed 3d printing and story telling. She needed friends, and a party of people hangin out would give her at least a few connections to start. Every night she "participated" in D&D, she mostly sat quiet and did not do anything. Hell, I tried to get her to participate in 2 different games, and after she left the first one, she asked to just sit quietly in the discord call (This first one was online only, second was in person) and listen, which was super awkward. In the in person game, after 3 months of playing, she did not know how to play her character at all, and mostly spent her time at the table crocheting. (My buddy even made a comment about how at one point, he was proud of how good I was getting at DMing and I was giving particularly good exposition, and she interrupted me to hand another player at the table a dice bag she made. I don't remember it, but I absolutely believe this happened.)
The day of "the incident", she had a meltdown about how a friend of hers had ghosted her. I told her it was okay, she was much younger anyway and people grow apart. She's probably going through stuff and we should respect that path she's on. She cried about how she has no friends.
Also the day of "the incident", we were in the shower together and she told me she had met her sister's new BF on facetime. I asked "why did she break up with her old one?" "Well... she cheated on him." "Oh, that's a shame. Cheating is probably the most cowardly act a person can do to another. If you're going to start a new relationship, you need to grow a pair and end it before starting a new one." She clearly took my words to heart.
One of my biggest pet peeves about cleaning the house is our dog sheds, a lot. If I see a hairball roll through the house it immediately drains me a bit. We had a roomba. She would send that thing home when it started and never start it again. It barely ran. She would not vacuum.
One of the most common descriptors of her I've heard used by many people now that they're "allowed to" is "She was there, doing the thing with us, but it was like she wasn't there."
Something she thought that I apparently hadn't figured out by the time we talked after everything happened was that they had been talking since February. I told her I wasn't stupid and had figured it out already that this wasn't out of the blue.
Z's wife is currently pregnant with the baby of the man she cheated on him with. (And he is also married)
Anything else I remember Ill leave for comments, I know there is much, much more.

I am back with another review for my holy grail - the AB lip balm-again, it’s gonna be a long post.
As I have mentioned again and again, the AB balm is the one to rule them all. It moisturizes, it removes my lip peeling, and prevents future peeling. It has a heavenly texture, and no matter how much you apply it to your lips, there is no pilling or white cast even after rubbing your lips together. Don’t get me started with how it feels on your lips, my lips feel sooooo pillowy (not sure if that’s a word). This has also been the first winter that my lips have not cracked or been painful dry…and it is this beautiful texture that is its downfall.
I was very excited when I found out that Augustinus Bader was coming with a color version of this lip balm with a collaboration with Sofia Coppola . It’s no exaggeration that I’ve been through at least 15 tubes of this lip balm. I keep one accesible at all time (purse, desk, by my bed, etc) … that’s how much I like it.
The version comes with a very cute colored strip at the base of the tube and colored logo at the top. On the inside of the tube, the letters are also highlighted with color. The change is minimal, but meshes well. Whoever was in charge, did a good job.
The AB balm texture continues to be its original buttery, and light formula. For reference, I chose the shade #1. Now, if you’ve ever used watery lip tints, you’ll know that they will settle into dry spots. For me it makes those dry spots a shade darker and make my lips overall, blotchy. Some also settle into your lip lines if you don’t blot them with your finger. This is exactly what the AB tinted balm does, it’s just that in this instance, it is its amazing formula that works against it. The color settles immediately on my lip lines, it is not a smooth even application of color that a lip stain like a Rare Beauty Lip Oil would give you . It also leave (hopefully this makes sense) an outline of color where the rounded edge of the lip balm touches my lip. Meaning that it leaves patches of colored lines on the outline of my lips. I’m disappointed, so disappointed. I REALLY REALLY wanted to love it, but I can’t…the only way to salvage it is to even it out with my fingers, but that defeats the purpose of an easy, no mirror application. If you are not careful with its application, you’ll look like a baby that’s learning how to eat and has food all around their lips after slurping spaghetti!!!
Now, this tinted balm did give me an idea. I felt that its texture would mesh well with a tint or stain. I have a lot of leftover AB tubes. I save them, scrape the leftovers at the bottom of the tube, melt and fill a little pot with it.
This time around, I dug through my lippies and chose my Cha Cha Benefit tint in “mango”. I melted all my lip balm leftover on a wax burner. I (generously, but did not measure it) poured the lip tint in the melted lip balm. This made the AB melted lip balm solidify a bit, but as soon as it warmed again, it melted and after stirring it, it combined beautifully. I did noticed that it solidified easily as soon as I pulled it away from the wax burner and so I had to work fast…and Voila!!! It turned soooooo goood! My hunch was right and my little experiment worked!
As soon as the leftovers from the pot I melted the lip balm on solidified, I tried it on. Guys, the melting process did not destroy its original texture (although I have yet to see how this mixture will work in a lip tube form). The color spreads smooth on my lips, no blotching or settling on my imperfections or dry lips, and with the cute color payoff!
So, with little extra work, I came with the best of both worlds! My favorite of all time lip balm, but with a “personal improvement”.
I do hope that in the future, Augustinus Bader will come with a similar product… and as soon as that happens, I will be getting my hand on them too!

Help an elder millennial out… what are some fun ideas in or around the city to celebrate a 40th birthday?

Hey bbs.
A few days ago we did the subreddit b2b2b2b2... thing again and our DJ who will be making the mix nudged me to actually purchase the tracks, which, honestly, was not a bad idea. Actually quite a decent one.
So I did, they already have the .wavs and will get to work soon 😏 If you'd like to contribute financially to this, I put together a gofundme to cover the purchases, on the page you will also find the link to the receipts and a few more of my blabla words about how cute this whole thing is.
https://gofund.me/bb5238f6
Sacrifice one club mate at the next party, buy a track, make a producer happy? 👉👈
💖
I really hope I did the calculations right, it would be quite a faux pas if I made a mistake somewhere in there...

Am I the only one that finds it weird that no one has a crush on Ayano? She’s so pretty. It’d be interesting to see something like that. My suggestion would be Hazu. I personally don’t think he’s a good love interest for any of the rivals. It would be cute to see him develop a small crush on Ayano, since she can do little things for him like getting him drinks. I’ve talked to a lot of people about an idea like this, and they all agree, especially with Hazu being the one to have the crush on Ayano.

I have attempted this an unreasonable amount of times and still have not gotten it to work. I connect my cracked game to the internet.
I have gone through the steps of logging in, logging out (if already logged in) logging in again. Then going to the https://accounts.ea.com/connect page and gone into the browser console. I was able to see the remid cookie every time, but it would not work when I copied it into the page. With and error message saying:
"(Online error) Invalid remid!
Make sure you paste the correct value. It should contain only alphanumeric characters (a-z, A-Z, 0-9) and it has to contain one dot!
It may contain +,/,-,_ and + too but I haven't seen it in my tests."
I've accepted the new terms and conditions in the EA app, I've cleared my cookies multiple times, I've tried manually inputting the remid.
I've noticed that the remid has changed a few time in my process, with the first part remaining the same. The piece following the period being the only part that changes.
If anyone has any idea what I'm doing wrong I would appreciate any help.

It’s gunna be a long one so I suggest getting your self a drink get comfy and I’ll try to make it the easiest read I can. As the title suggests this is what happened to me, my wife and our 2 year old son. The lord as my witness everything written is 100 percent true and accurate with many witnesses.
I don’t even know where to start this so I’ll just go from where I feel is relevant, I 31 male moved to Cornwall uk in 2018 then 24 coming up to 25. I moved into a beautiful one bedroom flat with sea views with nothing but a motorbike 1 bag on my back and a starting date for work 18th February 2018.
All was fine everything was going good life was finally looking up I moved from a city to rural countryside breathtaking beaches, beautiful people and I was ready to finally start adulthood. When I moved into my flat I had nothing, absolutely nothing apart from 7 days worth of clean boxers and socks a guitar and some chef whites. The flat was unfurnished apart from a bed frame and a chest of drawers so naturally I would have to buy everything I needed while I was there, I didn’t even have a mattress for my bed. 2018 was a big year for Cornwall as we had the beast of the east, heavy snow (now I like snow and being a northern boy I was used to it but this stuff came down thick and heavy)! As I said I had a motorbike for transport and I was in work when the beast of the east hit and obviously couldn’t ride back home as the snow was about 2 ft deep by the time I left.
So I walk home and as soon as you entered my flat my bedroom was to the right of the front door a cubard directly in front of you my bathroom just to the left and my living room just down the hallway to the left also. In my hall way I had a shoe rack where I always used to put my shoes, now given I had just walked 3 miles in the snow I could swear I put my bike boots on said shoe rack when I got home. Any way I carried on with my evening as normal and played guitar drank a few beers and just generally chilled before getting my head down. I was sleeping on my couch as my mattress hadn’t arrived yet, but the next morning when I woke up my bike boots was in-front of the couch like some one had jumped on them walked up to where I was sleeping and jumped out. Not only that my heater had been pulled out of the alcove it was in and turned on. I passed this off as nothing it was probably just me and I didn’t remember.
Fast forward a few months nearly a year and I’m all settled my flat is great, my work is great life is good. I met a beautiful young lady (that’s now my wife) although we just started as friends. I’m so happy.
How ever I worked on a holiday park as a chef, one day I get a knock on the back door to the kitchen. There was a man that I had been serving all week and he said sorry to bother you but my wife would like a word with you. Now I’m thinking great what have I done now. But she was smiling and happy and said to me is your gf or wife pregnant I had neither at the time, so I responded nope why do you ask? She told me her name it was carrol (forget her second name) she was a head at a spiritual church in wales. She proceeded to tell me I had a little boys spirit following me around and she could see him. I didn’t know how to react, so I just said oh ok really! And took her details added her on Facebook etc etc, now a few months go by things in the flat was getting weird not that I recognised at the time but like things moving / going missing and I just played it off like it was me being tired from work.
Again fast forward a little bit I’m dating my now wife and mother to my children, she’s staying over but she worked evenings till early hours in the morning when i would wait to go pick her up, at this point I had sold my motorbike to buy a car (more practical and I needed one as per the condition where I worked was I had to have a car to collect stock of a morning).
One night she was in work I was sat at my table designing her tattoo for the back of her leg as I love to draw, I used to have lanterns on my table that where on like a metal frame but they could swing. That night I was drawing both lanterns where swinging in unison so I FaceTimed I will call her red (as I don’t wish to identify her by name). While on face time I showed her the lanterns and I stepped away from the table thinking my shading was moving them and the second I did I swear to the almighty lord they stoped dead! Dead centre like they hadn’t even moved. She witnessed this and was like what the ****.
But once again we put it to the back of our minds and fast forward a few days / maybe a week. I used to have a picture of red and her best friend one of them stupid long ones that you get from a photo machine at an arcade, locked behind my intercoms phone. One day we was stood in the living room and i promise no one was near it but this picture came from behind the phone and landed in the middle of the living room floor. We laughed about it at the time and was like oooooo spooky but we was stupid!
So strange things kept happening red hated being in the flat on her own and hated being in my room as I had a built in wardrobe and she would always say she felt uneasy. The strange things never stopped but we always just brushed it off. Until …….
Our son is born now there’s a 2 year gap where my little lad I’ll refer to him as A, the happings never stopped or eased but we would always just pass it off, how ever when A was about 2 he would always talk to him self in the kitchen and say brother, look daddy brother but not a second later he would scream. Any one whos a parent knows there kids sounds and this sound instantly got my back up am talking as a father hearing my son make this noise I was ready to kill, the anger and rage that I felt inside was something I can’t even put into words, my baby boy was terrified of something and fatherly instincts kicked in.
Every morning while at this flat I would wake up with little bumps or marks across my body, but I always thought it was where I slept or how I slept, but red noticed the same time my lad was doing what he was in the kitchen I was waking up with what looked like chain marks around my wrists and arms and sometimes I awoke with scratches not 4 or 5 like a human hand but 3, just 3 linear scratches across my body.
Covid 2.0 come along, we all get locked down now hear I am with a young family so I did my door badge, I got night work as a security guard and red would refuse to sleep with A until I got home she would always say it felt like something / some one was watching her.
Now red had family down, and said family is a medium (at the time I would have laughed at this as I was very much so on the fence). But one night reds auntie was at her mums house and was doing a reading. During this reading she said she become overtaken by an entity she started pulling this horrible smile that my little lad used to do. (I wasn’t there to confirm this). But the next morning red and I and A are out and about in the car just been for hot chocolate when red gets a phone call from her mum.
Are you with T (me) red says yeah why? Her mum says get T and A to mine right now they both need to be saged with a white feather. So at this point I’m like *** off laughing but then I thought **** it I’ll ride the bus to the next stop. I walk into reds mums and her aunt (who I’ve never ever met doesn’t even know my second name) says to me you would have had a little boy, he would have been around 5 now and his birthday is in July.
Truth be told before I moved to Cornwall I had relations with a lady they should have been forbidden and she fell pregnant, but unfortunately lost the baby. How ever she was pulled to one side by a stranger in the street whom said 10th of July he would have been here.
So this lady reds aunt doesn’t know a thing about me but knew this, knew what faces / smirks A used to do and knew about him screaming from the kitchen and climbing up me in panic. She hadn’t seen or heard any of this no one had.
She proceeded to tell me I had a evil entity attached to my back and that’s why i suffer with back pain, this entity was hiding behind the spirit of my unborn and when A seen him or tried to interact with him he would come out from behind my unborn to scare him. He would use A•s fear and trauma as energy to try and make its self stronger as its end goal was me. It was terrorising my son to get to me.
I went white what the actual **** is going on, I spent the next few weeks thinking I was going insane. But things at the flat was getting worse I contacted Carrol and she said go into every room every storage room / cubard every dark space and say if you are not here with love and light then I command you too leave
A was getting more and more anxious in the flat, around this time we had been accepted for a house and one day he was in the hall way, I was getting the hoover out and he kept slamming the door on the cubard shut saying no daddy I thought he was being cute. I was wrong.
As things started to escalate we tried to reach out for help I’ve gone from a sceptic to a full on believer. We went to a witch shop a couple of towns over, the sell crystals candles etc etc. but when we walked in the woman wouldn’t even look at me, I tried to explain my story but A started messing around so I took him out side and this lady said to red no candles or crystals are going to help him with what he’s got she gave red two business cards for 2 white witches.
So let’s fast forward again at this point reds had enough A is unhappy! But we have a new house to move into so we said we would stay in the flat one last night before we go to the new house the next day. Our last night in the flat didn’t last from the second we walked in it felt so cold so unwelcoming just horrible atmosphere. So we packed up and went and slept on the couch in our new house. That was the last time red or A would step foot in that flat.
I had given my notice to my landlord about moving so I was there cleaning with L that’s reds sister and as we are cleaning we are both in separate rooms, she is in the kitchen I’m in the bedroom I hear her scream and then she ran into the room I was cleaning. Turns out this thing was not happy not happy at all. She was cleaning the cubard under the sink and as she tried to close the door she said it felt like something was pushing against it. She let go of it and it slammed shut. I did actually hear it from the bedroom, I told her to calm down it will be ok and we will work together.
I walked into the bathroom now this flats been empty all day I had had a wee when I first got there but other than that, nothing no one had used the bathroom. But when we walked in there was water everywhere sink was soaking wet, shower tray was soaking and the black and glitter tiles where soaked. We just wanted to get the **** done and get out. That night she left and swore she would never go back. Any who
I get reds mum over to sage the flat and she said she hated being in there, and I have 3 friends they are all into the paranormal, and wanted to explore the flat. I allowed them in as they where down on holiday and I’ll call him S is just like me emotionally dead only had two but after he left that flat he got in our friends car, he broke down in full blows tears and said he’s never felt so empty unloved and lonely. Another of our friends said he saw a long thin figure in the living room all in black with no eyes and was not of this world. He said the reason it had no eyes is because the eyes are a portal to the soul and things not of this plain can’t copy the eyes.
Any way let’s move on I left that flat and every time I left I had to say you are not welcome to follow me or attach to me, you are not welcome in my home or around my family you must stay here or go back to where you belong
Me red and A have lived in our new place a couple of years he’s happy no more screaming and running up me, red is comfortable and I haven’t awoke with chain marks since we started living here.
Red has crystals on all entry and exit points, she had the house saged, but on a whole she is happy and content, I am just never allowed to talk about these events infront of her. Last I heard that thing is still at the flat with my little unborn boy and my A•s grandad who did well to protect A.
This is my story that changed me from a sceptical to a firm believer in paranormal entity’s.

I did some research earlier today on FMLA laws after most of the replies regarding my matter yesterday seemed to be way too focused on me being stupid, focusing on my quitting (which was withdrawn prior to my last day), rather than explaining what it covered, who qualified, and the importance of deadlines.
I don't contest I am stupid, so if you see it in this post, please explain why rather than just calling me an idiot. I get that enough from myself as it is.
Anyways, after reading into some of the laws, I realize HR may have already screwed up in writing. Whether that's an issue or not, I'm not sure someone will tell me here, but please actually explain because nobody pointed out the first violation I may have noticed when worrying about deadlines.
First of all, I do actually qualify for FMLA protections, since the 12 month time with the company does not need to consecutive. So although I may not have reached my one year mark currently, if CA goes even 3 years back, I would as I am a re-hire.
So if that's correct, HR may have already screwed up by sending me a request for certification of a healthcare provider May 8th, but requesting it due by the 20th, as there is an allotted 15 calendar day period the law grants employees to complete it - though it could be longer? I only bring this up because I just got off the phone with my therapist today, whom I hadn't seen in months prior to todays session, and essentially side-stepped the FMLA paperwork to instead spend our session discussing (read: me finally venting without judgement, never giving him a chance to actually comment) the death of a close friend of 15 years last August, and how my upcoming birthday is making me extremely depressed/anxious since I'll finally be older than her - and she'll continue to stay the same age.
But to stay on topic, since I already have a time set aside next week to catch him up on the parallel side story that hopefully won't further traumatize him, I realized our next appointment time - despite being past the day HR requested I submit the completed FMLA paperwork - still falls within 15 calendar days of when they requested it - though again - I know I can be given more time and don't expect my therapist to sign off.
HOWEVER, to bring this back to something others may have picked up on in my previous posts, but only briefly mentioned; I suspect HR may be operating under the assumption my claim is fraudulent, since I've only told a FEW coworkers about the panic attacks and nights where I don't sleep, and all upper management knows is I have a second job that occasionally calls me in for overtime.
Going over the company FMLA paperwork, I can see why they may be so comfortable going off of "he's faking it" watercooler talk, rather than humor the idea I may not want to make coworkers upset with the above story, since there's a section that directly asks "Is the employee able to do work of any kind?" - in my employers FMLA paperwork - which would obviously be fraudulent if answered No, considering the second, much less stressful job.
HOWEVER, as I learned from other redditors who don't chastise stupid people, there's FMLA paperwork that's downloadable straight from the department of labor AND there's a law stating an employee must accept all FMLA paperwork regardless of format. Annnnd since my two jobs are in separate fields, there shouldn't really be any explanation required for why I'm less stressed at the job that pays me to sit on my ass and another that consistently shows my heart rate at 110bpm outside of my regular 50bpm when it's lunch time.
So, I do apologize for yet another long rant, but I was finally able to pick up my ADHD medication yesterday after several months of being without. New meds, too.

My poor little boobies have been through some serious abuse and I've been told that once I'm all the way finished for awhile and the skin has time to shrink back that they do go back to looking at least a little closer to the original.
I have no idea though if my nipples will ever be ok again. I have 3 babies and decided that allowing them to self wean would be the best choice for us, so my oldest weaned shortly after his fifth birthday, my middle was done around his second birthday, and now I'm 9 months into nursing my baby with no idea how long she'll go. I had 8 months breastfeeding through pregnancy and then 2 years tandem. I actually sat down with a calendar and in the past 8 years, I have only spent a little under 22 non consecutive months neither pregnant or breastfeeding.
My oldest was a twiddler from hell, so I knew from the beginning to not even let the others start, but the 2 youngest are such horrible biters. My nipples now are like too long if that makes sense? They stretch way far away from my actual breast like freaking gumby and the dark brown of pregnancy has faded, but they're still darker than before kids. They look like they literally have calluses on them.
Do they shrink back down to normal size, return to their natural color, and maybe the calluses fade away? I'm having a hard time picturing like physiologically how a nipple would even be able to go back to normal. Did anyone else go back? Did the rebound seem to correlate in any way to the duration and severity of how they were treated?
I'm grateful I've been able to provide this for my babies and I don't regret doing what I believed to be the best thing at the time, but honestly in retrospect, I'm not sure if I would do the same thing again. I'm trying to focus on the benefits for them, but when I look at them (my boobs, not my kids) I just think of how much of a mental, physical, and emotional toll this has taken on me over the years and I get so sad by how ugly they've become. Please tell me there's hope eventually 😭

Located Toronto, Ontario
Backstory: My business is currently doing great, making $12,000 CAD per month with no employees and $450 in business expenses per month. My personal expenses include my phone bill and the $450 for business. I have no debt, and my business is projected to reach $25,000 per month by December.
I want to buy a house ASAP, but I’m also considering putting my down payment savings into investments and renting for the next few years.
I currently have enough liquid cash to pay for 1/2 year of rent
I need to leave my parents' house. My options are either moving out or spending $1,800 every other month to escape. Living here feels suffocating, and my parents demand a lot of my time despite me running a business and working from 9 AM to 11 PM. I barely have time to see my girlfriend, and they expect me to attend birthday parties and family dinners, saying things like, "Look at everything we’ve done for you." While I understand family is important, it feels like they see me as an investment they need to be repaid. I respect their struggles and plan to support them in the future by putting them on my payroll, but right now, I want to focus entirely on scaling my business over the next five years. Living here is driving me crazy, and I have no freedom.
I can’t buy a house anytime soon because I don’t have 2+ years of tax history to prove my income. I’ve been grinding this business with zero income for a while, but it has finally taken off and is highly scalable (my clients include some of the biggest startups in Silicon Valley under subscription-based payments).
So, I’m considering renting a nice condo downtown to get an office space and actually leave my house. Working 14 hours from my bedroom in Pickering is driving me insane.
I also thought about becoming a "digital nomad," but I wouldn’t be able to focus as well, and I prefer my office setup and being at home (traveling is exhausting). However, I’m wondering if it’s a good idea to take a break for two weeks, maybe go to Miami or a resort, to clear my head.
TL;DR: I feel like I’m going crazy living with my parents (I need to be alone). Should I move out and rent, or keep saving up for a condo/house?