For context me and this guy match on tinder and hit it off for the first week. We were talking everyday and we talked about meeting and even FaceTimed (once). Then he got spotty with responses and I said if he wasnt interested in still getting to know each other that was cool and he assured me he still wanted to. Then again goes a week without messaging but I accidentally end up messaging him cause he has the same name as a coworker in my phone. I tell him it was the wrong person and he got weird. We go another week or so of not talking and I assume he ghosted but to be sure I send a message and he eagerly responds and we continue to convo as if nothing happened. He said when I messaged him that I messaged the wrong person he “felt a little something.” So I guess that’s why he never reached out. We’re back to talking and all but one night he asks if we can watch a movie on call when I get off work. I get off at ten and he works early. He ends up falling asleep. The next morning he apologized for not answering me back. I follow up with “it’s fine” after like 8 hours cause as stupid as it is I was a little disappointed. I have not gotten a response since. I’m new to this whole talking thing and overthink a lot. My friend says I should not message him but it’s hard understand what happened. Cause y’all if you had seen the way this man interacted with me😭 you would understand. At this point with his whole not responding for a week thing happening before I’m scared to message him cause I don’t want him to think I’m desperate especially since I already expressed feeling his uninterest. I’m confused and don’t understand any of this. So please someone tell me what you get from this and what I should do now? Is he trying to ghost but I just keep pulling him back in and he doesn’t want to be mean? Ask any questions you want. Please be nice like I said I’m new to this💀
Also P.S. He has told me he sucks at this whole texting thing and on his tinder it said he preferred phone call. However over the span of a month we’ve only called once.

Wow, I never knew this page existed but I am feeling optimistic that I have found it. I will start by saying that I am finding myself more and more in a not so good space about my life. Let me give a bit of history over the past 5 years, to start, my childrens aunt (their fathers sister) was murdered in 2020, in 2021 he had a massive stroke and went into a comma, leaving him physically unable to provide financially, I was laid off in 2022, and lost my transportation before finally accepting a near 20k pay cut/difference with new employment. I do the best I can as a mother with what I have to ensure that I am able to pay the rent and put food on the table. I go without to make this possible quite often, suffering in silence, crying nights with no good credit or savings to get a new vehicle or lean on in hard times. so I do a bit of hair on the side being that I am skilled in hair extensions. it helps but in no way is it a saving grace. To have a good kick start is a dream. I have tried loans but cannot get approved anywhere and it honestly hurts my feelings because I am a good person. genuine to everyone, I have just had a rough few years. I am sharing because I feel I have no outlets, no help, no way of getting on track without finances, I hope this is a place that I can lay my feelings out on the table not having to pretend that everything, that I am ok with all of this because I am not. I struggle day to day hoping for a breakthrough. I hope I am not sounding like a whoa is me, I am just glad there is a place I can let this out. As a single parent with now no help and very little from ss, I work hard for my children, living in a world that leaves me in fear for their financial and physical safety, so I try my hardest to just show up and let them see the work without the tears and struggle. I know I have said alot and want to thank whoever took the time to read this. Im crying writing this because it took me a while to admit to myself I am hurting because of my struggles, but again and finally thank you for putting this page out there for people like me and those kind enough to encourge, give, or share.

I've been in a happy relationship (relative to my past) and mostly satisfied for the last 3 years. I'm a bisexual 21 year old girl and my boyfriend is straight, a few months younger. He's been my first everything and I genuinely love him so much, we've grown with each other and he's done so much to help me financially and personally just because he can. "Cool story, but what's the catch?" you might be asking yourself, WELL. I've spent a lot of time wondering if I'm missing out- I've never messed around at all or been with a girl, partied, or really had any fun and I'm only 21 years old. I guess what I'm worried about is that I won't find satisfaction in our relationship forever because there's so much of myself that I've never explored. What sucks is that I love him so much and he loves me too- it makes me feel so guilty and dirty for even considering that maybe it's a right person wrong time situation. I know that if I left the relationship he wouldn't understand and we wouldn't have another chance. So here I am, stuck at a cross roads of being in a comfortable life having sacrificed knowing what could have been will probably never be, or potentially ruin my entire life for what- the unknown? But I don't know what I don't know. I've stayed up for hours thinking about the pros and cons. Obviously it would be easy to choose him, but he also has trouble fulfilling a few of my needs. To keep the list fairly short, he has a lot of trouble with emotions and I'm mentally ill, so his ability to help me through my dark moments and comfort me is umm. Not great. We also have other conflicting personality traits but they can almost always be worked through. Our love languages also don't align very well and he has difficulty with affection and sentimentality. I wouldn't normally count it into the equation but I have to admit that he's not very sexually satisfying. He's very awkward and makes very little effort to do things that I like. (I've shot and edited 10 minute videos for him before, tailored to his kinks and desires-- it's almost never met with enthusiasm or appreciation.) Now, I'm leaving out everything that I love about him because I really don't know where to start. I feel that it is very important to say that I really love him and even though we have these problems, it doesn't generally affect our day-to-day life and relationship. Maybe what makes me feel the worst is that he's the only chance I have at going to college. I'm not going to lie, he's given me a lot of financial support and the profession that he's going into makes a lot of money which would make my life easier. GOD I feel like such a gold digger to say it, but it's true. This might seem like a no brainer to some of you reading this, but it really causes me a lot of internal discourse and the situation is more complex than I can currently convey. I don't know what to do and it sucks.
TLDR; If I stay I'll never know and maybe never be satisfied but be happy and comfortable, and if I leave I'll understand myself better and have more experiences but I might never find happiness like I have now and my future would be more uncertain. I guess my question is, how am I suppose to know which path will make me happiest?

Hi there! Spending a rather quiet day to myself, so thought I'd come to this subreddit and make a post to see if I can potentially find something to talk to. I do hope to find something that is interested in a genuine, long-term conversation that won't ghost or run away after like a day of talking. Just someone that will stick around, where we can invest in one another's interest and become close and see it evolve.
A bit about myself:

• 28 years old
• Living in the US
• Work usually keeps me busy... Sadly, a bit too busy, so it's tough to put myself out there at times
• Tend to get lonely, and sadly, don't really have anyone I can befriend or see it grow into something amazing and beautiful
• Spend most of my day alone, so it would be nice to have some company that will stick around. I like to consider myself a good listener that will invest in your interests, hear what you have to say, and someone that knows how to keep a conversation going :)
• During my free time I enjoy working out, playing sports with friends/coworkers, reading, photography, gaming, taking on new skills and interests, occasional music production, and art.

I realize that finding someone long term, especially online can be tough haha. Especially considering that people tend to ghost, lose interest very quickly, or jump to another person when they get even slightly bored. I enjoy learning about others, I don't like to play games behind the other person's back.
I desire something genuine from the very start, which is something I hope to find here. One thing I've noticed is that people tend to stick around during the whole "honeymoon phase," meaning, when things are fresh and you're getting to know one another. But then as the days go by, you notice them putting less and less effort into the conversation, disappearing a lot, or coming up with excuses. I get it, we all have a life, but it would be nice to have someone that was serious about pursuing a long term friendship and building something up over time rather than a day or so event. I don't get bored of others, I really enjoy putting myself out there and in turn learning about those around me as well, so I can guarantee you I'll be sticking around and engaging in you and your interests as time goes on. :)
Sorry, that got a bit lengthy, but hopefully this can attract those that are interested in the real thing!
If you're interested in giving this a shot and possibly seeing this turn into us being best friends, I'd absolutely love to hear from you!

I (21m) am studying in Italy for erasmus and in a long distance relationship with my (22f) girlfriend of a year and a half. I really like it here a lot and I am considering transferring full time for many reasons - family (I would be living closer to them), financial (more job-security for my field) and personal goals (I genuinely want to live and work here in the future).
My girlfriend and I are in a tough situation, because her future is very clearly not here. I‘ve told her that I‘m applying to some programs to study here full time, and she’s told me we would have to break up if I transfer, which I fully understand. Whenever we talk about it it‘s understandably very tense, and I think she‘s convinced that I‘m going to choose to transfer (which is what I‘m leaning towards), which has made us lately really feel disconnected. She is very upset because this situation is harder for her to deal with, which I believe is because I‘m the one who is making the decision and I will probably end up with some benefit at the end.
Anyways, something happened recently that is making me really have doubt over our relationship even more than before. My Italian is good enough to take courses, but I‘m not making many friends due to my shyness and lack of confidence in my language skills (in fact, all of my friends have been other erasmus students, and I‘m not very close with them). However, I very recently started chatting with this Italian girl in my class who is incredibly friendly and nice to me, and I have the largest crush on her, which developed after just talking with her only one time. I‘ve only talked with her 3 times so far for short periods of time between and after courses which makes me feel incredibly immature and guilty for such strong feelings while in a longer term relationship, but it has reached to the point where I am just thinking about her constantly and how she‘s perfect for me. I of course feel guilty for feeling this way, and I recognize that my insane feelings are probably due to numerous factors that wouldn’t happen normally (my lack of connection with my girlfriend during long distance, desire for friends, isolation in a foreign country on and on). However, I just can‘t get rid of this feeling - I have been thinking about her non stop for the past weeks and I don’t know what to do. I feel like this has revealed some inner perspective of my relationship that I maybe just couldn’t admit to myself in the past, but this is making me view my relationship differently and is making me want to transfer even more now.
I of course love my girlfriend and I feel like a complete a*hole for these feelings, but part of me is saying that I should listen to both my logical reasons for wanting to transfer and this as well, even though I fully know that my feelings are not necessarily the most genuine (due to the reasons above).
Are my feelings for this girl too irrational due to my lack of connection and being isolated in a foreign country? I thought to myself that she was cute before we talked at all, but didn’t really think anything of it - not sure if that’s relevant at all. 2) If it’s likely that my girlfriend and I are going to break up due to me transferring anyways, would it hurt to break up sooner than later if I‘m already planning to transfer? The devil in my ear is telling me to break up with my girlfriend right now, which I obviously can’t do with such spontaneous emotions, but it‘s made me consider the idea, which I had not even at all before seriously. 3) Am I a jerk for not telling this girl about my relationship, even though we have only talked a couple of times so far in between courses? Should I tell her? I can‘t believe I am even thinking these emotions, I‘ve literally known of her existance for less than a month. Please help me approach this situation logically and find a solution that helps dissolve it without being an a*hole.
TLDR: I‘m studying in Italy as erasmus student and I want to stay for my full degree here, which would mean breaking up with my girlfriend. Also, I have a massive crush on this girl in my course that developed instantly, which I don’t know if it is rational.
**Please ignore mistakes in my post, English is my second language.

Tony Altimore vs. Mike Paidousis: Bad opener. Tony is around 45 and looks older, and Mike is 50 and looks even more old. Mike looks like a tough dad who could still beat you up at least. He made his debut in 1950, Tony in 1960. Tony is best known for being Lou Albano's tag partner eons ago. This match should have been filmed in black and white. I felt bad for Mike because he really moved so slow and seemed like a fish out of water to the point where he barely looked trained. Turns out he was a grizzled vet. Tony tried to be entertaining like Albano, but he didn't have much to work with. Fans not really into this one but were at least polite enough. None of the offense looked legit although Mike hit Tony with a couple of loud strikes. Finish came at 13 minutes after Tony missed a dropkick and Mike awkwardly pinned him with a slow ref count. Yikes.
Greg Valentine vs. El Olympico: Making his MSG debut, a young Greg Valentine- billed from California- truly impressed me. Ironically, the fans were making catcalls to Valentine on the way to the ring. Even today some fans joke that Greg looks like a grandma. It's baffling to me how such a masculine no-nonsense dude is the blunt of gender jokes. Valentine bullied Olympico and laid in STIFF shots that had appeared to really hurt him. Olympico actually fired back with STIFF strikes of his own in a fiery comeback. I know the sadist Valentine loved the pain he inflicted and received. Greg mostly dominated but allowed Olympico to get his dropkicks in. Fans were into the match. The finish came at 8 minutes with Greg laying in the hammer elbow drop. Ancient ref was slow again, and the ring announcer pronounced Greg's last name as "Valenteen". That said, excellent debut! Valentine was a natural and a great technical heel. Way better than the standard WWWF heels at the time.
Chief Jay Strongbow vs. Waldo von Erich: Waldo basically caused a near-riot by sneak attacking Strongbow and throwing him over the post (HUGE bump by Jay!) in 39 seconds to win by CO. Waldo already had heat based on his Nazi gear. Bruno Sammartino came out and carried Strongbow away with officials. Fans wanted justice but will have to wait. Excellent booking for a future match between Waldo and Bruno.
Little Tokyo & Lord Littlebrook vs. Little Louie & Sonny Boy Hayes: 2/3 falls 20 minute time filler. I am now burnt out from listing match times and unfortunately finishes. Will just do stream of consciousness. The workrate was good. These little people worked harder than the larger people. Three major comedy spots with the referee, all demeaning. Little Tokyo impressed me but wasn't in it as long as Littlebrook, who was also a true pro. Fans were into it. Just wish WWWF would have good technical wrestlers who could do a 15-20 minute match in the middle of these cards because the little people (and "girls") never had any angles or promos on TV, so these matches were cold going in. That said, 1975 fans treated them much better than when they were still doing this in the 1980s.
Bruno Sammartino (c) vs. Spiros Arion: Wow, this was the match I was expecting. Makes perfect sense why they didn't go all out last time. This Death Match was basically an early "I Quit" or Submission Match as opposed to the pin one from last time. Excellent brawl. Bruno showed so much emotion to get a final revenge on Arion. Fans went through the roof. Loved the finish where it seemed for a split second that Arion would pull off the upset after his atomic drop finisher and he started to climb to the top rope. He missed his knee drop to an unearthly pop and Bruno destroyed his knee for the submission. The intensity brought tears to my eyes. Bruno is just so over beyond anyone. He is the pride of Italians and New Yorkers.
Edouard Carpentier vs. Joe Nova: 48-year old Edouard Carpentier was still more agile than everyone else on the card! Not an exaggeration. This Hall of Famer must have been the most athletic wrestler in the Golden Age. He finished the match with multiple cannonballs (sentons). He was very flashy in this match and his spinning kicks fit in well with the Kung Fu trend of the time. He did miss one, but that was due to Nova. Nova was basically enhancement talent who made the match feel longer than its 9 minutes. His bio says he had a well-traveled career and some feuds in various places, but I'd day current day wrestler J.D. Drake does that style much better. Anyway, back to Edouard Carpentier- his cartwheels and backflips kept reminding of how illogical Jim Cornette's rants about "flippy shit" are. There is a near 100% chance that Edouard Carpentier would be wrestling like Will Ospreay if he existed in 2024. That's how things evolve. No, Carpentier's flashy stuff wasn't realistic for a real fight but what he and Antonino Rocca did is indeed pro rasslin'.
Manuel Soto & Pete Sanchez vs. The Valiant Brothers: Edited off tape.
Bob Duncum vs. Victor Rivera: I always get Bob Duncam and Bob Duncam Jr confused. Anyway, time limit draw due to curfew. Ran pretty long. I like Rivera's varied moves (back suplex, belly to back suplex, and cannonballs- he missed one which was cool). Could have done without the rest holds from both men. Rivera also tends to sell too long and had his comebacks cut off. There was a good sequence where he was thrown out on the floor and tried a sunset flip to win it but Duncam was kicking out of everything. Quite a few near falls. Fans were somewhat engaged as they threw the kitchen sink at each other although I wasn't that impressed with Duncam's offense and generic Cowboy heel gimmick.

Context- I’ve been dating my man form the past 4 years he’s been living with the same flatmate since we met. We met in the lockdown hung out as friends and eventually got together. He does a very mentally demanding job so often blames that. So my bf is messy and used to find it really cute earlier that I had to help him a little with cleaning and making the bed, etc. but I didn’t realise it until after the lockdown when both of us started working that he’s extremely messy and a little dirty, he takes care of his personal hygiene but everything around him is a mess. Like he won’t change the bed sheets for 2 months if I don’t visit him, will keep half eaten food here and there it’ll go bad and still won’t pick it up, there are cups/ plates all round the house that have fungus in them coz they are unwashed since 4 days, his home is literally sticky and even the maid can’t get it off. I can literally go on. I used to go to his home at-least once a week and clean his he for him (cleaning the bedroom, change bedsheets, thow away bad food, etc) but recently I have reduced my visits since my mom is on bed rest and she needs me by her side. Yesterday I came to his home after my grandma came to visit and stayed with my mom. The home was an absolute mess. Hall was filled with his bags, food and shoes, his bed room was disgusting with everything everywhere, kitchen was stinking. I tried my best to clean but couldn’t do the kitchen and laundry as I was tired. He came home and complained about the undone laundry I said sorry but he reminded me that he washed a pair of pajama pants and a dress last week and I should’ve done this. I laughed at this thinking it was a joke but he wasn’t joking I said that I’ve been washing his clothes from the past 2 years and never asked for something like that. He then went to say that men usually don’t do ‘girly things’ like these. I was offended was an understatement. I was angry and told him I want to go home to which he responded great I’ll come with you I don’t want to stay in this house we both left and had a very big fight on the road. I understood that I can’t be blackmailing him with I wannna leave if I’m angry but he refuses to acknowledge that he’s disgusting and can’t do his own chores. Today morning I saw a rat in the kitchen and I’ve been nauseous since. I’m really scared of rats. This had happened earlier and I bought the pest control but I saw some disgusting things the last time I got them. So I refuse to call them and be there when they are working. But also I refuse to go to the kitchen. He says I’m being over dramatic but I can’t take these dirty habbits. AITA?

Forgotten Dreams

Some people call Night City the City of Dreams. But to those of us living in it in 2044, it’s the City of Nightmares. Twenty years after Johnny Silverhand detonated a thermonuclear device at the Arasaka Tower and ended the Third Corporate War, the city is only just now leaving its post-apocalyptic state. The Nighters that call it home are either too stubborn to leave or have nowhere else to go. In the remnants of the American third world, that isn’t too unusual. The sky is still red with the particulates left over from the Fourth Corporate War, casting a dark bloody glow over the world. Underneath this crimson sky Night City is a battleground where every man woman and child is locked in a never ending war for survival. As hard as what remains of the Night City government and relevant neocorps try to maintain order and rebuild infrastructure, most of the city is still in ruins or utter poverty, usually both.
Electricity is unreliable, the water is tainted, and the animals have long since died out or been driven from the city leaving artificial meat and plantlife the only food sources and ration chips a universal currency only eclipsed by cold hard Eurodollars. Overall, Night City is a pretty fucking miserable place to live.
But that just means those of us left are more determined to keep fighting. The corpos at the top want to squeeze the corpse of the City of Nightmares dry of any and all eddies it might have left, the politicians want to hold on to their power, the gangers want to cling onto the highs of designer drugs and spent bullets, the civies want to keep the lights on and rations on the table, and us Edgerunners want to make our mark on the world before we get snuffed out. That’s how it works. We burn bright and we burn hot but we just don’t burn long. Not in this city.
For us, it isn’t about just surviving. It’s living on the Edge. The fine line between life and death, the new frontiers of technology, fashion, night life. We have the most ‘in’ clothes, we have the baddest guns, we have the shiniest chrome. We see this city for the living nightmare it truly is and we laugh in its face and dare it to try and take us early. And when it does, we get the greatest honor an Edgerunner can achieve: a drink named after us on the menu at the Afterlife, the bar where we all raise toasts to the legends whose lights went dark at last.
We come from all walks of life, all kinds of backgrounds with all kinds of goals and hopes and ambitions and dreams. Solos, Techs, Medias, Fixers, Netrunners, Rockerboys, Medtechs, Lawmen, whatever. But wading through the mud and muck of this city for so long can mean we get caught up in it. Stuck in the endless river of shit with no way of getting out of the nightmare. We lose sight of what matters, lose sight of the Edge. Get caught up in gang wars, corporate contracts, hunting criminals, pulling off heists and staving off cyberpsychosis. We forget the dream. We forget what makes us Edgerunners.
But I’ve been watching you for a while now, and you haven’t forgotten. You keep the dream alive. You’re living it. You’ve reminded me what it means to be an Edgerunner, which is more than I can say for any of the other new talent trying to make a name for themselves in Night City. That’s why I’m reaching out to you. The names Checkmate, and I’m looking to put together a crew for a job. A big job. The kind that’ll set you up with the street cred and the eddies to jumpstart your career by a decade, at least. Find me at the Afterlife, and let’s have a chat.
Drinks are on me.

Background Lore

The world of Cyberpunk is a dystopia that focuses on individual stories of strife, hope, and personal growth. It’s a hellscape world that isn’t due to change anytime soon, and instead you learn how to survive and become the best version of yourself within it, holding on to your humanity as best you can in a world that is determined to take it from you. Sure, corpos and gangers and mercs and cops are probably going to feature as the enemies you fight mostly, but it isn’t the true enemy. The true enemy is Night City itself. The city is a metaphor for the society and very world, an abyss that’s just waiting for the chance to swallow you whole at the first opportunity. Night City is the pit where humanity goes to die, and it’s also your only true salvation because it’s where it’s at. There is no Cyberpunk without Night City, there is no humanity without Night City, there is no you without Night City. The only way to beat it is to leave it, and even those that have the opportunity often can’t bring themselves to do it.
No one ever wrote a legend about the one that walked away, after all.
The timeline of the Cyberpunk series diverges dramatically from our own around roughly the 1990s—although other divergences do occur well before then, albeit smaller in size and scope—where the fall of the Soviet Union at the end of the Cold War leads to a dissemination of nuclear weapons on the black market. Coupled with a US government "deep state" called the Gang of Four, the world soon finds itself in the midst of an economic crisis and the Collapse. Proxy wars, trade wars, and a resurgent Europe butt against the prevailing US world order. Eventually, brief nuclear exchanges and biological warfare around the globe cause the gradual decline of Western civilization. Societies collapse and many governments either dissolve or are reduced to reactionary, petty authoritarian states.
In the chaos, corporations fill the vacuum of power amidst a collapsing social order. Technological advances, unbridled from government oversight or ethical limitations, lead to hundreds of new inventions. As time wears on, some corporations become as powerful as the countries they are housed in. Ultimately, four corporate wars have occurred by 2023, each one becoming more overt and deadly than the last. The infamous Fourth Corporate War was brought to an end by the detonation of a nuclear bomb in the heart of Night City. The years that followed until 2045, the Time of the Red, were a period of global reconstruction as corporations and governments alike tried to recover from unparalleled economic and environmental damage. Lawlessness, chaos and technology. This is the world of Cyberpunk.

What is Forgotten Dreams?

This roleplay is all about the Edge. The Edge is the idea that Cyberpunks/Edgerunners live and die by, which is always going forward. Never compromising yourself, never bowing down, never allowing the authority and the corpos and the world to step on you. It means the fastest cars, the most in clothes, the best cyberware, the most deadly guns, and being cool and reputable. It means living your life by the idea that you are going to be a legend, a Street Samurai that lives on forever by the badass deeds they accomplish and the people they touch.
But as the saying goes, no battle plan survives contact with the enemy, and living life on the Edge comes with its risks for you and those around you. Night City is a violent place, even before it got nuked. Life is expensive and death is cheap, and the eddies don’t trickle down unless you take them. It's easy to lose sight of the dream, lose sight of the Edge.
You will be taken on a journey that will test you physically, emotionally, and psychologically. You will see the best and worst Night City has to offer in a time when chaos is the rule of day and stability is a long forgotten memory. You will experience action, intrigue, mysteries, romance, betrayal, and more. But be warned because once you start straddling the Edge, there's no getting off again.

How Do I Apply?

If you are interested in going on this adventure with me, then what you have to do is the following:

1. Send me a PM with 'Forgotten Dreams' in the subject line. I will not respond to any chats sent my way unless they are requests for a PM first for whatever reason as I just don't like the chat system here.
2. Tell me what I should call you, a fun fact about yourself, and your likes and dislikes in storytelling, especially your hard limits. I am a writer interested in very dark themes and smut, and part of that means knowing where I need to stop for you.
3. Give me a basic character idea and a writing sample. It doesn't have to be very long, but the more complex and detailed the better chance of securing the writing spot. The writing sample should be a short narrative about your character receiving Checkmate's message and how they react to it.
4. Finally, really sell yourself as a partner to me. I'm only looking for a single partner on this idea, and I'm going to be very picky about it.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Date of relationship: 2020
Date of move in: 2021
Date of marriage:2025(2024)
Date of trying for children: 2030
I proposed in 2023.
My(29m) wife(29f) and I started dating at the end of 2020. After about 9 months we moved in together in 2021. This was when I presented her with my plans for our future.
I wanted to date for no more than 5 years, meaning we would marry by 2025. Then we would get a home together this way if we ended up divorced, she also could get the home or finances from it. Then begin to build our home for us and kids. I planned for us to wait until 2030 to begin trying for kids so we had time to find our feet and make sure we were stable enough for either of us to be a stay-at-home parent for up to 4 years.
When I presented this plan, I explained that everything was negotiable to an extent. She listened and, in the end, agreed with it all as reasonable and responsible. I told her that once a year I wanted to sit down and go back over the plan to see where we were and how we still felt.
Well after I proposed she asked to go ahead and get married, and I agreed as my plan was to be married by 2025 it didn't have to be exactly 2025. I did request to go back over the plan before our wedding but the day we planned to, she got pulled away due to family issues and told me to just wait and we could go back over it later. With wedding stress I forgot and we married 2 weeks ago.
I remembered a few days ago and made a date last night to go over it with her. We sat and talked and had fun pointing out what we had gotten done before the “set dates”. All was fine until we came up to the kids part. I started talking about how we might end up having them sooner than expected and she laughed but froze up. I asked what was wrong and she admitted she no longer wanted kids.
I was caught off guard and asked when she had figured that out. She said she's felt that way for about 2 years but didn't bring it up because it wasn't time, and she thought she might change her mind. I asked why she married me if she didn't want kids and knew I did, and she said because she loved me.
I asked her why she admitted to it now and she said because I had always said our plan was negotiable and she was certain now that she wouldn't change her mind so she was hoping I would. I got mad then and said that giving up kids or ending my marriage is not a negotiation but rather an ultimatum she was forcing me to choose. I said a negotiation is a discussion that involves two or more people to resolve an issue in a way that each party finds acceptable. For example: You don't want to give birth for your reasons, so we agree to do adoption... You don't want kids at all, I do, so the only thing we can do is end our marriage so we both get what we want, me children and you child free.
I guess that bothered her because she said that I was a crazy AH for having a plan and sticking to it. That I should be more willing to change my mind and compromise for our relationship rather than worry about my plan in life. She left and went to her mother's and we haven't spoken since. Her mother says I'm an AH and should just be happy to have her daughter as my life partner. My dad says having the plan might make me seem like an AH and I probably shouldn't have shared it with her but I'm right to not want to stay with her if I want kids and she doesn't.
So aitah for all this stuff?

I met my wife in 2012, we got to know each other as just office colleagues, she enjoys eating and wanted company. I'm the kind of person who hardly says no to anyone, so when she asked me to accompany her I did and that became a habit. We became friends, shared everything. We are from different culture and country but the universe planned us to be together. We got married in 2015, had our first child in 2017 the second in 2021. Wife has been offwork SHM since 2016, I've been solely handling everything until now. Lost job during covid, moved to another country and started again, luckily was blessed with a decent job, got too ambitious build a home and that's all paid off, invested in lands and rental apartments still on finance. I'm knee deep in debts but I never let the family feel that way, they have a roof and I give allowance to my wife each month, despite no money left for me, I've been living on credit cards. She knows this but never wished to help. I understand she has to take care of kids but I hired a full time nanny and my wife still didn't try to support me. I'm not sure what happened but she's good with everyone else but family. We've kids from my rental property, they are always at my home. My wife would ask them if they had lunch or dinner but she won't ask our kids. My youngest sleeps with my mother in law. I work 700kms from home, commute almost each week. Have been diagnosed with colitis and doctor advised me to avoid stress and I've to take medicine for life. I work 12 hours 6 days to support my family. I earn decent but most of the earnings goes to pay debts. Everything is under my wife's name. But she still thinks, I'm not doing enough and not paying her enough to look after kids. My 85% earnings goes to pay debts and I give 10% to my wife for food and the rest 5% for utilities and credit cards. Each month despite earning in 6 figures, I've zero savings. I've been noticing that my wife would talk nicely to all our rental tenants and their kids but she'll talk to me as I'm no one to her, I know nothing, she's the only one who works a lot because she has 2 kids to take care of and I simply enjoy life as I'm away working and don't have to worry about kids. My parents visited us for 10 days recently and my wife ignored them for the whole duration. It hurts to even type this but I cannot accept disrespect for my parents. I can allow my wife to treat me anyway she wishes but not to my parents, they've only supported us. I've stayed quiet for such a long time because of my parents, they told me think about your kids. You're just starting your journey, the kids are young, if you take drastic steps pull affect them. But my wife thinks that my parents are giving me negative thoughts about her as she's been home for the past 8 years. All I want from my wife is a bit of respect and that she take care of our kids. I've the tenants kids stay at our home from 9 am until 9 pm and sometimes sleep at our house. I've requested my wife to send all the other kids to their respective bone after it gets dark, I don't mind them coming to play with our kids but staying in the house almost 24 hours is not acceptable, the funny things is since my house has all the amenities and comfort even their parents don't call them back after dark. My wife would buy food and drinks for them but would never cook for my kids. I've never forced my wife to do anything until today when I adamantly told her to tell the other kids to go back to their home and she flipped. She told me to fuck off, according to her that kids help her take care of our kids and since I'm only offering her 10% of my earnings, it's not enough for me to tell her anything, I should be grateful that she's even looking after our kids for such a meager amount. I'm at my wits, not sure if this actually explains everything but I'm really tired. All I want my wife to do is look after our kids and not focus on anyone else's. Today my mother in law apologised to me since I told her I'll be taking my kids with me and my wife can do whatever she wishes to, she can take care of whoever she wishes to, I'll be taking care of my own. I'm not prepared to be a single dad but I'm going to give my kids all the love and more than they deserve. Sorry for the essay but I just want to share that with my family or friends as everyone has their own demons to take care of and I don't wish to be a burden on anyone. I'll appreciate any advice or criticism. Thanks for reading. Hope you all have a lovely day wherever you are and may your partner be kind a loving to you, your family and friends.

I am BTech graduate. Today morning I applied for a job for a Chat Support Executive role. Afternoon, they asked me to send resume in whatsapp. Evening, they conducted a meet in google meet for all the applicants. In that, they explained the work. The work is - - - - There will be a dating site. We will be given some IDs by using which we have to chat with other persons on that dating app. We have to impersonate someone and chat. All the details photos videos, everything will be given by the HR. By using those details we have to chat. So for every message there will be some rate like 0.06 dollar. Like that, audio, pics, videos everything have their own price. Everything in the chat will be counted. And the money will be recorded accordingly in the same site. After the end of every month, we have to show HR - how many dollars we earned doing chatting. So that HR will send us money in INR. And they are saying this international transaction may take 15 to 20 days delay. Can I believe this job? They are not asking us any deposit fee. They are saying only to invest some time in chatting. You will get money. That's it. How true is this? Have you ever heard of any jobs like this? Please tell me ur opinion on this. Naku vere pani ledu. TechM lo job ochindi kani vadu joining letter epudu send chestado tldu. What should I do?

Okay, so a lil background here. Outta no where two years ago my dad started acting awful towards my mom for no reason. Last year he began accusing here of being a cheater and a pr0stitute while he was taking my brother's to karate. I stopped taking karate classes so I was with my mom all the time and knew this was false. It got so bad that my dad would yell at her every night, so one day, my mom took us and moved in with a cousin of hers.
Due to the court order, for a bit me and my brothers had to go to our dad every other weekend. Our dad would always start saying crap about our mom that we knew wasn't true. One morning I wasn't feeling well and wasn't hungry. He yelled at me until I ate a small piece of bacon(what he told me to eat) and then got mad at me for not eating much.
After that weekend I never spent the weekends with him again, but we still had to go to dinner with him on Thursday. He would then, every time he saw me, yell at me saying things like "why don't you want to spend time with your father?" "Nobody did anything to you" "what is wrong with you" etc. He then started talking crap about my mom to me and I defended her.
Ever since then all he does with me is yell at me and treat me like crap. He says he doesn't want to make me pick sides while he's talking trash abt my mom. I may be the a**hole because 1)I'm kinda rude to my dad 2)I accidentally make my mom look bad 3)he is my dad after all 4)my mom thinks I should try to rebuild our relationship but I don't want to

I don’t know what’s going on, I’ve had my health issues for 4 years and I feel like my labia majora and minora looks different in the past 2 years. Not to be weird but during sexual encounters when younger people would always say that it was “fat” in a complimentary way… sorry tmi… and now it doesn’t seem as puffy, I feel like the pubic bone protrudes out further and now the majora “lips” are smallemore inward. Does that sound impossible? I also have herniated discs and and incapable of good posture so I wonder if that could’ve caused a structural change that makes it look different overtime. I’m sad about it and don’t feel it’s as attractive, I guess not that it matters because I can’t have a sex life right now anyways

Hello!
My name is Reed, I'm a 28-year-old guy from Orlando Florida looking for someone to enjoy life with, as far as what I'm looking for. I'd say a meaningful connection, I am happy with the idea of being friends but also very open to it blooming into something much more should we both be on the same page. I am certainly not interested in rushing anything and anyone getting hurt due to miscommunications. Transparency and communication are key for me.
As far as who I am, I work a 9-5 (technically 9:30-6) and have a side gig writing that I really enjoy. I've been described by friends as a goofy optimist with a serious side. I am an increasingly casual gamer but would love to meet someone to pull me back into it, I used to be really big into online games but have been more so interested in exploring and immersing myself in cool single player experiences lately.
I love thrift shopping/going to random local markets and finding cool and unique trinkets/pieces of clothes, my all time favorite shirt actually came from a thrift store. I love going out and exploring new things and trying new restaurant, I consider myself a life time learner so always deep in some kind of new rabbit hole learning about who knows what.
I'm a big fan of high fantasy universes in nearly any medium, written, animated, really whatever. I don't really have a specific 'favorite' genre but I love anything that is unique and well thought out, and of course just movies that will make me laugh. (There is a special place in my heart for the Shrek series.)
I don't really subscribe to any specific belief system/ideology outside of 'do whatever you want as long as you aren't hurting anyone else.' and it has served me quite well.
here's some recent pictures of me
As far as who I'm looking for, I'm looking for someone who is capable of communicating and wants someone to share life with, as mentioned above what that ends up being is entirely up to us and where we go with things. I want someone I can genuinely look forward to talking to, someone that makes my day to day life a little less tedious, someone that can enjoy the small things and most certainly someone that doesn't take things too seriously. I want someone who isn't afraid to tell me the things they're passionate about, share your fire with me, tell me what gets you out of bed (as hard as that is some days lol) the things that keep you up at night.
If this stands out to you I'd love to talk and at the very least see where things go. I'd love to meet someone also in Orlando but quite open to anyone located in North America.
Thanks for your time and have a great evening.
Reed

This Is Advice I Learned With Time
Life is like the game show of guessing what's behind the door and choosing what you want to go with. You just make the best choices you can on what you know.
I heard and agree that you have to live with the cards you have. Some of us have better deals in life than others. We know there is no force that chooses favorites, but I know it feels like that sometimes.
I don't believe that things always work out for the best. But when something doesn't work the way you wanted it to, try to find something good about it. Try to find something you can get out of the situation.
You do not always get back from people what good you do for them. Some people are e not as giving as you are.
I don't believe you need confidence to get a job. You just need to act like you have confidence. I have gotten jobs when I have been depressed and not confident.
There may not be a market for what you enjoy the most. You may have to do it as a hobby.
If someone you care about has done something to hurt you, your options aren't just forgiving or not forgiving the person and never seeing the person again. There is a lot of in-between that is okay. You don't have to forgive someone for an incident. But you can continue the relationship for the other good things the person has for you.
Sometimes advice from older people may not be right for you. They have lived in another time where circumstances were different.
If you are trying to reach someone by phone for business who it's necessary that you talk with, who won't talk with you or return your calls after many tries tell the person taking the message that you will call every 15 minutes until the person talks with you. It worked for me.
If you own a business and you forget to return a call or forgotten anything else never say, “I forgot." I had people tell me they forgot to come by when they were scheduled. This looks irresponsible. Always have a story ready in case you make a mistake.
When you work for or own a company never bad mouth other businesses, even if a costumer complains about them. Speaking badly about other businesses looks very unprofessional.
Never hand out business cards at parties to people you just meet, unless they ask for it. I was at a holiday party, when someone told me was a relater. He asked if I wanted to buy a new home. He gave me his card. This is not the time to push your business.
I use to have a job handing out fliers for a store on a busy street. That bought a great number of customers to the store. I would recommend this to anyone who owns a business.
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Important disclaimer: First off, I do not condone hate, racism, cultural phobias or any discriminatory factors ever. Also, this post has a rather hefty side-quest.
Preface of who is writing this: (read only if you need to know more about the messenger)
I am a neurospicy AUDHD person. I'm a 41 year old male, who has somehow been driven enough to make it in my work life albeit in a vastly different path than most. Not the efficient way, but my way. I take Elvanse for ADHD and Lamictal for Autism. I find them to be very good for me. Your results may vary. I am horribly contradictory to myself all the time in how I work due to different pulls of my neurodivergency. I find this a blessing of sorts as I tend to view both planes of the truth. I have a remarkable talent for drawing schematics of a situation in my head, creating a clear picture, but the drawback to this is, I'm not not very fast at it like they are on television, and sometimes I take a lot of time not being able to understand the subject whils I'm forming the schema of the situation. Once initially formed I can be fast.
And once the schema is finished I can almost call me a topical expert on the subject as I have grasped the cogs and relations of most aspects.
I am sensitive to certain inputs, flickering fluorescent lights drive me insane like something really really horrible, large banging noises not made by me make me really anxious, and I have a weird social battery where as if I'm around silent and passive types my adhd will most likely eat away at them with me being the endlessly active one, but around social types I can be drained in a matter of minutes.
I took like 2 hours fixing this post back and forth.
The topic at hand: The below is how I see other people, and I don't expect everyone to agree with me.
I have noticed that "normies" quite offen irk me for many reasons. I have in my own little bubble coined the term "NPC" in english and another wording in Finnish for these types of people.
It is not exactly easy to describe the entirety of who is in this group, but I will try my best.
The types of people I mean are people who seems to live on systematic autopilot within our system. The people who work however each person does, but in their personal life will be driven by quite varying, but typical pursuits. The algorithn of their life would manifest in pining for wealth, gaining high social status what ever the manifestation is it feels like the algorithm is the same. They go to bars, or kayaking, or certain set things they have in their lives and it just repeats over and over. It's like once the cogs are set, they keep churning (not little habits, but larger picture of their lives).
They give off the impression that no matter how high their ambitions are, they are locked in this framework of the current zeitgeist not seeing much beyond that. Even the intelligent neurotypical people seem rigid in their set of rules that they become somewhat predictable and to some extent annoying. I am however partial in thinking that this narrow beam is exxaggerated inversely with higher social status, but that is merely due to external reasons and opportunities a person has and not due to internal mechanism differences. It also really doesn't matter in this context if they are considered good or bad people (I don't see people that way, ever).
This has honestly nothing to do with levels of IQ or other social hierarchy. It is just like their dreams and ambitions follow a predictable path of wants, needs and without certain overarching perspective of the biggest picture. Each person in their social surroundings find their own level of autopilot. Some are more elaborate.
The NPC's are the ones I think most often forget what we really are, where we are, and how little it all matters in the "personal identity" point of view. Even if they do grasp the consept and are aware of these things when the topic is raised, seldomly will they dwell in such large consepts. All of this is not so much about doing, it's more of a state of mind.
I always find neurodivergent people, no matter how far in to the rabbit hole they are or however small their social bubble is to be as though they have a certain twinkle in their existence that is missing from normies. I am often very drawn in liking this group of people no matter how far their traits are from mine. It's like neurodivergent people get it (within each ones realm of being able to interact in the world). "It" in this case is the special sauce lf life. I can't quite put the right words to describe it. It's that certain factor.
Let's not drag extreme cases of health and injury and impossible situations in to this. We do not dwell in extremes (another normie trait in my experience is to point out the exceptions first).
I dislike neurotypical people for their lack of taking charge of their existence in the sense that they put up with external annoyances more than they should unless faced with a deal breaking situation ( example could be irregular, time consuming processes in the work life for instance). My example here would be myself. Every time I run in to a bad process in the IT centric work environment, I find that normies just drudge through accepting these things with grit teeth even if the things just keep eating away at them. I have a low tolerance for annoyances so I find myself sending stern solution oriented e-mails to whomever and pushing back on each topic I see as a problem. Even if there is a risk of me risking my career. It took me a while to approach these with a solution orientation rather than merely pointing out the bad stuff m. I used to assume the other person also realises what the best solution would be (it took me a while to realise people don't see the big picture as clearly as I do).
Also, another thing I dislike about normies is their capability of advancing in their hierarchies even if they suck at what they do because they are not hindered in how normies communicate and they are often able to give off confidence. Maybe it is a form of psycopathy, and not a normie thing? I might be the best there is for a role I put myself up for, but my fidgeting and eye contact avoidance might seem offputting to others.
Unnecessary Epilogue full of off topic ranting: (not exactly directly related to the topic, but sort of a sidestep in the world of grievances)
Disclaimer 2: Below are academic thoughts on the meaning of words and descriptions of phenomena. In no way is there acceptance of any hate implied.
As a side quest I really get annoyed when terms like racism and [adjective]phobia is used incorrectly or too strongly. Even if they have been in time accepted as the norm. Why is the norm acceptable?
This is probably most related to semantic uses that have been adopted as acceptable.
Racism/phobia: Just a for instance I personally would want to distinguish between race discrimination and cultural discrimination. Further example if someone for some reason does not like Arabs, or Africans, of Nordic people, it is probably never about what their DNA structure is, a good example would be if someone does not like Russians. Russians are not a race neither are Africans. They are noth however being brought up in vastly different environments that can clash with the way you want to be treated and it is hard to combat this especially if they have a stronger will than you.
It is one thing to think of a certain heretary genome is something to discriminate for (racism), but another if you dislike a certain culture for what they bring culturally to the table. And again, merely not liking or being comfortable with someone for these reasons contrasted with using your power affecting their life negatively by barring them certain rights are two different things as well.
Just as a point if someone doesn't want to hang out with a minority, but does not in any way affect the individual in question's ability to move in the world, is not racism.
There probably are legal / definition points to make that disprove my take on this, but this is not a normie way of approaching it. I have a very good example of "everyone in Finland accepting something that is wrong" just to defend my stance. I feel strongly about the below example as to not do so is just autopiloting without meaning.
Words in expressions that literally don't work: In Finland we say
"Laita kengät jalkaasi" =intended meaning put the shoes on (yourself). "Laita pipo päähäsi" - intended meaning put the hat on (yourself). "Laita takki päällesi" - intended meaning put the jacket on (yourself).
The literal semantic meanings of those words are:
Put the shoes inside your foot Put the hat inside your head Put the the jacked on top of yourself.
The word "jalkaan" is the word jalka meaning foot, but the ending means to place inside. "Laita kengät laatikkoon" for example Is put the shoes inside the box"
And this is widely accepted as the norm. Which irks me.
Instead should pivot away from this madness and correct it immediately:
"Laita jalkasi kenkään" - put your feet inside the shoes "Laita pääsi pipoon" - put your head inside the hat.
Although with the hat reference one would probably be moving the hat towards the head, and not the head so if you want to describe moving the object you would say:
"Pue hattusi" where pue is the verb for dressing up. Dress your hat onto yourself.
With the feet reference you could probably say it either way, since both approaches are meaningfully true.
This, among other things is why I dislike people. Just not being consistent, or accurate. And people are not giving it much thought. I have brought this topic up many times, usually resulting in amusement and brushing off the topic as silly.
Hence we circle back to my statement earliers where I am often horribly contradictory to myself. I have a set mind, and I go about in a certain predictable fashion.
One more scientific example that is so cringy I would want to just write a stern letter to all the physisist who use this example.
Phycisists describe gravity, or gravity wells if you will as a large ripple or dent in space caused by a dense object in the fabric of space and time. Sort of like when you place a heavy object on a pillow. And since the curvature is pointing downward into a "hole" of sorts a relatively stationary object will accelerate an fall in to it. And if an object is passing through with speed it's trajectory will follow the edge of the bowl aka the curvature of the warping of space-time. While technically it describes accurately enough what the effect is to the object and how it responds as a metaphore, but hot damn if they are not using gravity to describe gravity I don't know what that is.
"So a gravity well is this thing, that if you place an downward hill in space, the object will run down that hill like Kate Bush.."
Soo in essence that is gravity explained by gravity. Yes Einstein, objects move toward the center of mass, fine, but how?
That is NOT explaining what gravity is even in the slightest.
Imagine if they did that with the question WHAT IS HEAT?
"Well, heat is when you warm up something and it becomes hot, and with enough heat the the object melts, boils, or burns." Ugh!
A better way to describe gravity as a phenomenon is a thought model I invented some years ago when the ipad 3 was a thing, but of course it very well probably is not be true as is and I'm not advocating that it is, I just want to show a more meaningful way of describing the gravity phenomenon so that it makes sence
My explanation ends up with the same cause and effect, but also describes the how it could happen.
Imagine every particle has an outward force that is emitted in all directions equally if left alone. This "spinning" of particles with equal outward energy in a spheric area is also what enables the object to react with things as "time" moves forward. Movement begets interactions.
These are the particles that are considered to have "mass".
They emit seemingly endless wave of particles that affect other particles in an aligning way. A particle with mass will send out "forces" equally in every direction unless affected enough by other emitted particles from other objects. Once there is a larger concentration of objects with mass the alignment of adjacent particles start to be greater and towards the center. Like how a wind vane works (you know, those metal roosters on top of the roof that turns with the wind). If you place a propulsion behind a wind vane and have it turn towards the wind it would fly against it if not tethered.
Aligned objects tend to send more particles in the opposite direction aka outside of the center in a more consentrated way since there are a lot of particles in the center and the affect grows in proportion with larger masses. The more there are the more the force of the outward "beam". Kind of like having more and more gattling guns shooting in the same direction. But these particles don't punch holes, they redirect the internal motions of energy in particles creating an outward force like a propulsion inward.
To visualise how the propulsion would happen is to think that the rotating energies create tiny holes in the center allowing energy to seep outwards resulting in directed outward momentum in the opposite direction.
Someone once corrected me and said but if they are emitting like you say they would they would empty up. Well maybe, maybe not, but what we do know is you don't need many of them if you split them open to make a big kaboom. That's a lot of energy to go around. And you don't need to seep out a lot per particle since they don't have much opposite push.
This emitted wave of energy results in aligning the propulsion of passing objects in proportion to the other objects mass. Since all objects with mass have their own gattling guns and the more particles an object has shooting in every direction the more you need to shoot at it to make their propulsion be affected in to the direction they are being shot at from. Like if there was a crowd of people all tied up to each other, and I alone try to pull on them with a rope I will have a hard time. They would have less problems pulling me in.
So, if the object is small enough to be aligned by the larger object by force it will be affected proportionally more than how much it affects the larger object (it still does affect it too). A tennis ball will very unlikely affect the trajectory of earth.
While objects are in interaction with only themselves, they will emit an equal force in every direction and the forces cancel each other out. In less gravity the electrons and energy within particles move more and more freely and there is "normal spinning" when as stationary as possible in the least amount of gravity. This would make the particmes interact the fasted aka time moves the fastest and a person would age the fastest. If you can place someone in 0 gravity and 0 absolute movement they would age the fastest. And if they are being affected in a narrowing way, by speed and or gravity they would start a slowing down effect due to hindered free movement.
This brings an interesting added bonus of relativistic time why speed and gravity affect perceived time the same way. Because the speed of light is the maximum speed, the faster an object moves the more these circling particle energies are denied forward motion towards the vector of the object so the interactions between particles grow smaller and smaller resulting in a slower moving "time". Kind of like if you're cranking an elaborate machine that operates via turning gears in sync with each other to read inputs from the putside world. If you then crank the machine forward slower, it will in sequence do the same things as always only every input is registered slower and the experience of the machine looking outward is that everything else related to it's functions are moving faster. It has not way of experiencing itself moving slower as it is also processing data slower.
As gravity affects the circular energy in a similar fashion it too would slow down reactions between everything like above resulting a slow down of "time".
All of the above would give a more accurate layman explanation how gravity / time / speed works and why denser objects have more pull of mass aka why it affects other objects more.
It's like Phoebe said in friends. She didn't feel so much being pulled as she was being pushed. In my example pushed would be the correct explanation. Like little tiny rocket ships hurdling towards the source.
This is the end: Holy moly batman, this is a long rant that side quested so far from my initial topic.
I guess it at least proves I'm not neurotypical, eh?
If you made it this far, kudos and apologies for wasting what could possibly be 15 minutes of your time.
Long posts are my thing. I try to make them mosre succinct especially in work emails, but this time I didn't. I also spent way too much time editing this I think I went down 20% in battery.
You are probably too exhausted now to reply, I understand.
Cheers !

TW: depression, suicide, addiction
Throwaway for privacy reasons. Hi all. I’m the middle kid and have two brothers, in their early and late twenties respectively. I’ve moved away from my family over two years ago and gotten married last year, so I am out of the loop on lots of things.
But what I’ve always known is that my older brother, Aaron, is a mess. He’s struggled with alcoholism since 15 or 16 years of age and is 28 now. His first incident he needed his stomach pumped because he drank my parents alcohol while they were away at 15, and was taken to the hospital by my grandma. From there, it’s only worsened. He’s dropped out of college (though he graduated eventually), skipped classes to get drunk, drunk drive, and had several medical incidents that, if not for my parents, he would be dead from. He’s tried medication (throws it away), therapy (stopped going), and my parents have attempted ultimatums for him to get help and get better, all have been unsuccessful. He has always been secretive but my family has always loved to push things under the rug and pretend things are normal or okay.
It came to my attention a few months ago that he’d regularly hang out with a coworker who’s 21 years old. For context, Aaron’s never really had any friends and has never had a real relationship where he isn’t exploited. He refused to call her his girlfriend this whole time to us. They “broke up” earlier this week and it was revealed that the girl he’s been seeing is literally satan incarnated.
Aaron was so emotionally manipulated by this girl it actually broke him. It turns out, they have been “dating” for 1.5 years. She didn’t want to be introduced to my parents because they’d call her out and expose her antics, so she convinced Aaron to keep her a secret. And this girl, Charlotte, was a player. A real sleazeball and quite possibly the worst and most heartless scammer I’ve ever heard of.
Aaron lives at home still with my parents, but has been paying this girl’s rent, $900, every month. She didn’t appear to have a car, so Aaron would drive her anywhere and everywhere - he even drove her ass 3.5 hours one way to an airport to be her ride while she was out for a week after he got done with a 12 hour shift, and also pick her up when zhe was done. He drove her to work and anywhere she needed to be.
Aaron also bought and adopted her a kitten and watched the kitten for her while she was away. Charlotte even convinced my brother to include her name in his will (yes, a 28 year old’s will, when they weren’t married or anything like that), and I’m convinced she encouraged Aaron to kill himself to reap the benefits. It was revealed by Aaron to my parents after their breakup that he had bought a $5k engagement ring and had planned to propose to her as well.
Aaron finally told my parents that Charlotte revealed to him that she had 7-8 other sugar daddies during their “relationship”, and was even sleeping with a 65 year old man. She merely saw him as a human bank and nothing more, and would play the long game by calling my brother for hours to talk to him on the phone and say how much she loves him and condition him to make him believe she actually loved him.
And though I knew this was coming for a long time, this broke Aaron mentally as Charlotte was his last glimmering hope. His workplace , a restaurant account, DM’ed me out of nowhere and gave me a number to a psychiatric hospital and a code to call for an emergency. I had to pry from my parents to see what was up.
My dad revealed that he took him to a hospital and he was transferred when Aaron confessed he was contemplating suicide. He bought rope from a store and was thinking about hanging himself, and also turned over a knife to my dad that he was intending on using for self harm. He also confessed he’d been thinking about getting shitfaced at a bar and jumping off a bridge into the water and killing himself. So, he was admitted to a psychiatric hospital on suicide watch yesterday, and they estimate that he’ll be there a minimum of 7-10 days, though Aaron apparently hopes to be released when the weekend is over.
I just can’t help but feel absolute animosity for this girl who exploited someone so heartlessly and in such an evil fashion. Granted, Aaron had demons before, and this only worsened his condition, as he was led to believe he had a friend and someone who truly loved him.
I don’t know what the next steps are. When he is released, how do we know his suicidal tendencies are gone? He can’t go back to work at that restaurant anymore - not after that. And this is just information I know, but obviously there might be a lot more that I don’t know about.
Any words of affirmation or wisdom would be greatly appreciated in this time, and I thank you for reading this far. I know it is a lot.
TLDR: older brother is a suicidal, mentally unstable wreck with alcoholism and was recently institutionalized for an undefined amount of time following a breakup of an exploitive and evil relationship.

I live in a Christian country in a Muslim household and I can't take it anymore. My father is obsessed with this religion and is a bad person in general. Because of him, I can't stand religion. Of course I have nothing against people who are religious, but I could never belong to a religion. Everything I ever wanted to do was always haram. I wanted to play instruments, but my father thought I had to play Christian songs. I wanted to take a dance class, but my father thought I would be too uncovered to dance in front of others because of the dance outfits they'd apparently give to us (I was in elementary school). I really wanted to hang out with my friends, but I was only allowed to hang out with this one friend whose family was also Muslim. That was in elementary school, now of course it's gotten better, but in one aspect it's gotten drastically worse: relationships. My father sometimes tells me very strictly that I must have a Muslim boyfriend or he will leave our family. He would find it so terrible, and of course my father's side of the family would be ashamed of me. They are all like him and I know indirectly a boy who was in their environment who converted to Christianity. Everyone laughed at him and treated him like dirt, so inhuman. And seven months ago I got together with my boyfriend because I fell in love with a boy as a teenager.
I was very lucky that he felt the same way about me and I was the luckiest girl in the world, you could say. But the first problem is the distance, because we met over the internet through a real friend of mine (but we have already met several times since he still lives in the same country as me and his parents accept our relationship, so he is allowed to visit me in another city). The second problem is, as you can imagine, my father. I'm seventeen years old and I don't have the right to do anything against my parents yet, because in the country we live in, you're officially considered an adult only from the age of 18. Until then, I just have to obey my parents. It's so stressful and painful that I can't confide in my parents about sensitive issues. My mother would support me, she is much more tolerant than my father. But because my father thinks he is the man, that is, the boss in the house, she has to obey him too. I don't understand that. So many daughters and sons find it easy to live this role in the family in their lives. Their parents are happy as soon as their child gets into a relationship and is happy. Why isn't that the case with my father? I have to wait until I'm 18 to move out, but until then he can't know about the relationship. I'm planning to get my parents to help me move so I can study in the city I want. At the same time, I will be able to meet and see my boyfriend much more freely, and maybe even move in with him at some point in the future. But this probably means that the contact between my father and me will be lost. There will be no other way out, he will never accept it. You can't have a normal conversation with him, he won't listen to you if he doesn't agree.

I feel like in recent years my brain has just gotten worse and worse and I’m only in my early 20s. I think a big part of it is sleep and since it’s summer I’ve been getting a lot more sleep. But for a long time I feel like my brain has gotten worse and worse. I can’t think of anything to talk about in conversations unless I saw or did something interesting. I can’t remember things that I learned growing up. It’s like someone will say something and I’ll be like oh yeah I know that but why didn’t I remember it until you said it (like some basic fact). I struggle to learn and problem solve. Even if it’s been explained multiple times to me I eventually forget it. I got my lab tests done and all I had was a vitamin d deficiency and my cholesterol was a little high. I don’t know what to do. Do I have brain fog or what?
Am I just lazy and need to have more self discipline to fix subconscious and conscious bad habits? I’m scared. I get anxious because I constantly come across as stupid to people and because I feel like I don’t have a grip on myself. Will this ever go away?

Hello as the title says I'm 26 and a male, I'm also from the United State, Midwest to be specific. I like to listen to music, mostly alt, indie,pop. I like to play video games, mostly Nintendo series. The paper Mario ttyd remake is out and I'm really enjoying it! I like to watch several popular animes, One Piece being my favorite anime. I love history, glad to talk about about any era. SpongeBob is sorta of a personlity trait if anyone wants to talk about a favorite episode. Anyway I'm sure we can find something to talk about, I think I'm pretty good listener and happy to hear about what's going on with life.Send me a DM if you would like to chat! 18+ only please. Doesn't matter if you just want a short term chat or try for a long-term chat!