Title. Can proxy for you. Let me know what size you need. Already made a post like this for the Brooklyn show last month. You pay first and tell me what size. If they don’t have that size tell me if you want any other size or if you want just a refund. I’ll refund if they don’t have your size. Charging $30 on top of the total of the shirt + shipping cost (probably like $6-$10 depending on your location). Shirts are selling for $200 online lol.
I resell clothes for a living, happy to show you my grailed with plenty of 5 star reviews and even recently sold the anime girl shirt myself on there.
And I fucking hate scammers, so, USA ONLY. AND YOU MUST HAVE KARMA ON REDDIT. NONE OF THIS 10 KARMA PROFILE NONSENSE. LOL.
COMMENT OR DM. SERIOUS INQUIRIES ONLY.

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Hey gamers! ka0s Tournaments will be hosting FNM starting this Friday, May 10th from 5pm-10pm EST.
We'll be opening our league for everyone to play in for free and giving away some prizes (tcgplayer gift cards, tournament entries, etc.). The top league players each month will split $400 in prizes! Head over to our discord to check it out, and ask any questions you may have!
Some of our staff will be playing too, so come hang out!
Also a reminder that Treasure Series XIV is this Saturday, May 18th!
Date: Saturday, May 18th
Time: 10AM EST
Format: Webcam cEDH
Entry Fee: $35
Signup: https://topdeck.gg/event/jxTGzeR2WCKPum6v1XAt
Location: https://discord.gg/ka0stournaments
Proxy Friendly!
Prizing: Over $2000 in prizing! Check out the signup page for details.
Earn points towards our invitational! Details on signup page.
Check out our upcoming events, invitational leaderboard, and more: https://topdeck.gg/circuit/jWM568hrKdBhfGIw7p8T
We also run a super active monthly league! Only $5 to enter for a chance at $400 in prizes each month!

Hi, it's Stads again covering OU usage trends in April 2024. This is some form of a follow-up to my post last month here (https://www.reddit.com/stunfisk/comments/1bw1732/ou_usage_trends_march_2024/), where I discussed the 5 pokemon with the greatest usage differential between the general population elo bracket and the 1825+ elo bracket in the March 2024 stats. For this month, the stats are sourced from https://www.smogon.com/stats/2024-04/ . This time, I'll cover both the top 5 increases in usage and the top 5 decreases in usage between the two brackets. Let's start off with the increases!

1. Zamazenta (9.79% vs 23.87%, +14.09%)

Zama just keeps taking off in usage, climbing to 2nd overall in usage in the 1825+ bracket and dethroning the elephant last month. Like last month, I suspect Zama is simply an extremely solid pokemon that both checks and fits well into offensive structures. Month-over-month, I see that a novel spread of Impish 16/0/216/0/40/236 has taken over the 1825+ elo bracket this month, albeit only a small plurality at 12.142%. This spread makes it quite a bit more physically bulky while speed creeping Roaring Moon, a key opposing mon for Zama to check. However, this is at the cost of no longer outspeeding key threats like Weavile, Darkrai, and +1 Dragonite. There's been some shifting in which moves Zama is running as well, with Crunch becoming slightly less mandatory, Roar and Heavy Slam becoming more popular, and Substitute falling off quite a bit. I suspect the very standard Sub IronPress Zama simply has been adequately adapted to, and these shifts reflect Zama adjusting to deal with opposing setup sweepers and fairies a bit better.

2. Kingambit (24.50% vs 36.72%, +12.22%)

Another repeat performer, Kingambit continues to be a popular pokemon in all elo brackets but especially the 1825+ region. While most of SV OU continues to adapt and proliferate new strategies, Kingambit seems to be a more locked-in constant, with no new sets, spreads, or moves especially rising in popularity. Leftovers, Black Glasses, and Air Balloon continue to be the main trifecta of used items, and while most sets seem to be Adamant and investing in bulk, running Jolly and max speed retains a solid niche. It remains to be seen if anything can really knock Kingambit from its perch in the coming months, or if we've reached a stable equilibrium.

3. Glimmora (12.23% vs 20.26%, +8.03%)

Finally, a new face! The favoured lead for many Hyper Offensive teams in SV OU since the beginning, Glimmora had a great month in April, coming in at 6th in usage in the 1825+ bracket. Month-over-month, Glimmora has remained markedly stable in how it's used, but the 1825+ bracket loves Red Card quite a bit more, at 41.295% compared to to 15.172% in the general population. I suspect this is because Red Card can be tricky to use, requiring some prediction to be best used in displacing an opposing setup sweeper while switching into an attack that won't OHKO Glimmora. I wonder if much of this usage was pre-Volcarona ban, with how reliably Glimmora could take a fire-type attack from the moth and get rid of all its terrifying boosts. I'm a little surprised that Glimmora has thrived with the emergence of Fast Taunt Landorus-Therian with Earth Power, but perhaps Hyper Offensive teams have simply adapted and are now finding other leads that can adequately threaten Lando.

4. Roaring Moon (13.17% vs 21.04%, +7.87%)

Salamence's prehistoric cousin has been terrifying since it was unbanned with the advent of DLC2, but it continues to really come into its own. A ludicrously strong Knock Off can not only be leveraged to sweep teams but also break open cores for teammates to later abuse, and its typing and natural bulk gives Roaring Moon the ability to often find openings against mons like Gholdengo and Gliscor. Everyone agrees that Roaring Moon runs Booster Energy, Dragon Dance, Knock Off, and Acrobatics (with tera flying), but while the general population seems to enjoy Earthquake and then Taunt for that last moveslot, the 1825+ bracket has a mild preference for Taunt, with Brick Break narrowly edging Earthquake as the runner-up. I'm not positive whether this is more of a niche tool against screens or just the best option available against the ubiquitous Kingambit, but it's an interesting development that's only really taken off this month. As an aside, I'm quite surprised that Tera Flying + Acrobatics has persisted as not only the premier tera option for Roaring Moon, but realistically, the only option. Flying is an extremely good offensive type with few fat electrics around, but I'm a bit surprised that no specialized counter-teras have developed for Moon to beat some of its established checks such as Weavile and Dondozo.

5. Clefable (5.63% vs 13.32%, +7.69%)

This one did surprise me. While the happy pink blob (no, the other one) continues to fly largely under the radar amongst the general population, it's experiencing a breakout in the 1825+ bracket. I suspect this is because post-Volcarona ban, the metagame has gotten slightly fatter despite the presence of Waterpon and Kyurem, and Clefable fits excellently into many fat structures. Magic Guard is an amazing ability always, but especially in a hazard meta, and also makes Clefable one of SV OU's two premier knock absorbers alongside Gliscor. The support movepool is just as good as ever with Thunder Wave, Stealth Rock, Knock Off, Wish healer, and Calm Mind wincons all quite viable. Magic Guard and the prevalence of booster energy also makes Clefable an excellent user of Sticky Barb, which can attach itself to mons post-booster like Great Tusk and Roaring Moon, easily dooming their sweeps. The general population acknowledges this set with 13.93% Sticky Barb usage, but the 1825+ bracket expects it, with Sticky Barb as the #1 used item at 43.833%. The general population also seems to enjoy specially defensive Clefable sets quite a bit more - perhaps to better deal with Kyurem, albeit in a very risky way - while the 1825+ bracket leans into the Sticky Barb with physically defensive sets being ubiqutious. While Clefable has exploded in popularity, it does seem to be only on balance and fatter team comps, with its most common teammates being Gliscor (completing the knock absorption perimeter), Corviknight, Dragapult, Great Tusk, and Dondozo. If Clefable gets more usage on offensive teams, it'll truly be a sign that the SV OU meta has at long last started to slow down.
I'll also go over the 5 pokemon with the greatest usage drop between the general population and 1825+ bracket. If you see your favourites here, don't necessarily worry - they may still have realistic niches to fill on OU teams! But it is still good to analyze why certain pokemon will be favoured or disfavoured in certain environments.

1. Serperior (6.58% vs 1.44%, -5.14)

This is hardly a surprise anymore. While Serperior will have a certain floor of usage due to it's status as a starter pokemon and the allure of the Contrary + Leaf Storm combo, it's simply too pidgeonholed to exist much in the 1825+ bracket. Tera Blast is used around 60% in both environments, though I'm very curious if they tend to use the same tera type or if there's some difference. The slight boon of having a great matchup into Webs has also faded a bit as that playstyle has fallen off slightly, and with Rillaboom, Waterpon, and Grasspon providing plenty of grass-type attacking prowess, it seems unlikely Serperior will find a niche even with the exit of Volcarona. The real discussion is how Serperior will fare in UU come the June tier shifts, with many great answers such as Hydrapple and Tornadus-Therian seemingly poised to handle it.

2. Corviknight (10.69% vs 6.00%, -4.69%)

I'm not 100% sure why Corviknight remains popular amongst the general population while sliding in the 1825+ tier. It might be due to Lando-T taking its spot as a pivot, it might be because it simply doesn't wall things as hard as it wants to. Mirror Armor has a sizeable fanbase among the general population at 32.949%, but the 1825+ bracket practically ignores it at just 3.263% usage. In both environments, Corv is very predominantly physically defensive to better deal with threats such as Kingambit, SD Gliscor, and Roaring Moon. One absurd data point - Roost only has 90.999% usage in the general population. Is this a typo? Are there really 9% of people who don't use Roost on Corvinkight? I imagine even cheesy sets like Bulk Up + Power Trip would be running Roost. I have absolutely no idea what's going on here, and I suspect that looking too far into it will only induce madness.

3. Torkoal (6.91% vs 2.50%, -4.41%)

Torkoal is generally used to provide sunlight for Sun teams, but is rarely also run on trick room teams with Choice Specs to nuke everything with Eruption. Sun, among other 'gimmicky' Hyper Offense styles such as Webs, Trick Room, and other weathers, tend to be a bit less reliable up in the 1825+ bracket where teams are more sturdily built and nuking everything with force generally won't go quite as far. So it checks out that everyone's favourite sun turtle would get a bit more usage amongst the general population.

4. Cinderace (9.82% vs 6.13%, -3.70%)

Cinderace getting less usage in the 1825+ bracket represents the continuation of a philosophical shift to the hazard subgame. Hazards have been very difficult to remove conventionally this entire generation due to Gholdengo blocking most forms of removal. This means that previously, Cinderace having unblockable psuedo-removal in Court Change was an excellent workaround. Now however, offensive teams generally prefer to have their own hazards up and simply try to limit how many hazards get set up on their side of the field with tools like Fast Taunt Lando as well as the popularity of Glimmora and its Mortal Spin. I expect the general population will gradually catch up to this trend over time, though with Cinderace being a starter - and one banned in previous generations at that - it likely has a bit higher floor of usage than it would in a vacuum. I also note that the 1825+ bracket seems to try Blaze Cinderace a bit more, 26.526% vs 16.816%, with Blaze taking Pyro Ball from a very good attack to one that can really dent even bulkier mons.

5. Garchomp (4.18% vs 0.81%, -3.38%)

Another Pokemon whose general popularity is probably carrying it to decent usage among the general population, while the 1825+ bracket has moved on. It's slightly strange to me that SD + Scale Shot Garchomp sets have been completely absent from the meta, but perhaps that niche is simply not compelling enough with Roaring Moon, Gouging Fire, Kyurem, and even Haxorus as physically-attacking Dragon-type alternatives. What usage Chomp does get in 1825+ seems to be confined entirely to defensive hazard sets, with Rocky Helmet, Dragon Tail, and at least 1 hazard. But even in this use case, it's hard to find a real niche when Ting-Lu, Deoxys-Speed, Glimmora, and other great offensive hazard setters exist. I won't go so far as to say it's completely Garchover, but it may take a large meta shift on the back of a ban or two for Garchomp to find true OU usage again.
I hope this was an enjoyable follow-up to the previous post. Feedback is appreciated, let me know if I've missed anything this time!

Created this sub to discuss and share anti western, anti-Israel, and antisemitic propaganda coming from Iran and their proxies (like Hamas and Hezbollah) and other anti-western propaganda (like Russian or Chinese misinformation). A lot of the propaganda out there is simply over the top and pretty damn funny. Let’s drop that propaganda in this sub so we have a safe place to laugh about how dumb their shit really is. Enjoy!

(The information on the three gold companies in this report is not definitive. Instead, this information will drive you to do more due diligence and make an investment decision.)
A different way to invest in gold is to look for great properties. If you bundle the three companies/properties in this piece, you could own three great properties collectively for under CDN2.00 a share.
https://preview.redd.it/r3ojx4rynl0d1.jpg?width=1500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f188257532dc4ca3a50611b50bbde4ffa44ea47c
GOLDEN RAPTURE MINING (GLDR: CSE) is a collection of premier Ontario mining properties in the Rainy River region that have done enough work to unveil potential, below but left a significant amount of gold with great g/t numbers. As of this morning, some numbers will indeed up its profile. Considering the stock has been listed for about two weeks, these results are excellent. Forgive the length of the table, but given the quality of the results, investors must get the whole picture.
https://preview.redd.it/fzy13fb0ol0d1.png?width=833&format=png&auto=webp&s=a844bbabf8febd58fa858fe4f4d1b62f89c5f1c6
First, the newest, being listed in the last month, is Golden Rapture Gold. The Company intends to reactivate past mines in the Rainy River area of Ontario. The property is so new that management has only walked about 5% of it, but the numbers are already impressive over its two projects. The Company holds a 100% interest in the high-grade Phillips Township Gold Property, Rainy River District, NW Ontario. The land package totals 225 claim cells for approximately ten thousand acres located close to 4 mineral deposits. These assets include the New Gold Rainy River Mine (+8 million Oz.), the Cameron Lake Deposit (1.8 million Oz.), the Agnico Eagle-Hammond Reef deposit (3.3 million Oz.), the Tartisan Nickel, Copper, and Cobalt Deposit, and many others. Mature local infrastructure, workforce, heavy-duty equipment, hospitals, major highway systems, and local services are nearby.
https://preview.redd.it/jqg05eo1ol0d1.png?width=1135&format=png&auto=webp&s=a02df752577dbd62bddcd872fc131fe7794fce59
Mr. Richard Rivet, CEO of Golden Rapture, commented: “I am incredibly pleased that we have just made some essential and rapid steps toward identifying additional high-grade drill-ready targets. We were pleasantly surprised to discover many high-grade quartz veins on the surface, with the majority of them carrying gold. Unlike many exploration companies, we are not just chasing the typical geophysical anomaly but also many vast high-grade gold structures identified on the surface that can be drilled at any time.
https://preview.redd.it/303n77s7ol0d1.png?width=843&format=png&auto=webp&s=96df5f7ae205367b1a51d30b482d9940c91d0d22
The Company holds a 100% interest in the high-grade Phillips Township Gold Property, Rainy River District, NW Ontario. The land package totals 225 claim cells for approximately ten thousand acres located close to 4 mineral deposits.
These assets include the New Gold Rainy River Mine (+8 million Oz.), the Cameron Lake Deposit (1.8 million Oz.), the Agnico Eagle-Hammond Reef deposit (3.3 million Oz.), the Tartisan Nickel, Copper, and Cobalt Deposit, and many others. Mature local infrastructure, workforce, heavy-duty equipment, hospitals, major highway systems, and local services are nearby.
Ryan Yanch CIM, a director of GLDR, states***, ‘One extremely important fact is that GLDR’s drilling cost is an industry-leading CDN140 a meter. It is not unusual for other gold comp[anbies to spend CDN200-400 or more a meter. One major contributor to this is that one significant cost is the location of the drilling company. 17 km away from the properties significantly lowers the capital cost and allows a more robust drilling program”.***
Given the uniqueness and exceptional quality of GLDR’s properties, there could be excellent investor support. Gold is rallying, and the prospect of further rises may portend in the shadow of interest rate cuts.
Previous work on the properties quickly removes the ubiquitous ‘drill’ on the property or other tropes. These are serious businessmen and women with decades of mining and entrepreneurial experience.
In the world of junior mining IPOs, there is a feeling that the stars must align to profit. Au contraire***. The keys to investing success are the right properties, management, and, in this case, a rallying gold price.***
Numero Deux
https://preview.redd.it/p6h56dz9ol0d1.png?width=479&format=png&auto=webp&s=67770cada4ffa1e689c4611a19309ea0d9eadbfc
Element79 Gold Corp (the “Company”) (CSE: ELEM) (OTC: ELMGF) is a fascinating gold company and the second in our gold triumvirate located primarily in Peru through its flagship Lucero, Peru, property.
(Full Disclosure: James Tworek, CEO of Element79, is an adviser to the GLDR Board. Your humble scribe owns a small position in each Company.)
The past-producing Lucero Mine (“Lucero”) is one of the highest-grade underground mines in Peru’s history, with grades averaging 19.0g/t Au Equivalent (“Au Eq”) (14.0 g/t gold and 373 g/t silver).
https://preview.redd.it/of62jjsbol0d1.png?width=557&format=png&auto=webp&s=63799ac26087364b8afa847435d1ba86de0701d3
In its past 5 years of production, ending in 2005, it produced an average of 40,000oz+/yr.
Assays from March 2023 yielded 21-ore-grade and high-yield up to 11.7 ounces per ton of gold and 247 ounces per ton of silver from underground workings, further validating the potential for a significant high-grade future operation.
Consolidating its focus in this region and its impressive geology, ELEM acquired the Roxana Vein and surrounding 1200ha property, Lucero del Sur 28, via auction held on May 17, 2023. The property is located strategically just east of the high-grade Lucero gold-silver project.
Instead of going into much history, let’s look at the Press release ELEM put out on April 23. New assays were released, and CEO James Tworek stated, “The data obtained is not just promising; it’s the cornerstone upon which our future endeavours will be built,” said James Tworek, CEO of Element 79. “These recent results, coupled with historical data, represent the bedrock upon which we are advancing our Lucero project.”
Corporate Presentation.
https://preview.redd.it/q0peilsdol0d1.jpg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=70ca19204d296b5505017134f9a3238b6d713256
From the PR: A total of 97 samples were sent for assays, 56 of which returned greater than 0.1 g/t gold (up to 8.55 g/t gold and 523 g/t silver. Several samples also were rich in base metals (up to 23.7% lead and 9.9% zinc), all of which underscores the richness of our project, further supporting the Company’s belief a robust resource base can be delineated. (Actual assay numbers are shown in the PR)
James C Tworek further states, “Element79 Gold has transformed from an asset amalgamator and seller to a near-term production story, responding to Peru’s government push for formalizing artisanal mining operations. We at Element79 Gold are thrilled to share our unwavering dedication to bringing our Lucero gold project in Peru into production. This past-producing, high-grade gold and silver mine holds immense potential to revitalize our Company and foster economic growth and prosperity in the region. “
The other ELEM property brings us back to North America. Nevada, to be precise. Reason to pay attention?
https://preview.redd.it/ahbl9b9gol0d1.png?width=504&format=png&auto=webp&s=de8c1fe7b99e4fee542ebd7b57e12b0fb60ddf28
Maverick Springs is adjacent to the Carlin Trend. For the uninitiated, the area contains several of the largest gold mines on Earth. The area includes a number of the largest gold mines on Earth. Maverick Springs is a blind deposit comprising a 30-120 metre thick, flat-lying zone centred on an anticlinal structure with oxidation pervasive to 120 metres and intermittent to 270 metres. (5)
West Whistler property is in the same area as Maverick, closer to the Battle Mountain Trend, alongside Carlin: Near several gold deposits, including the Cortez Mine, North America’s third largest gold mine with 2021 gold production of 828,000 ounces.
Finally, the Clover Property, 16 km west of the massive Hecla Mine in the Northern Nevada Rift. The property sits at the top and centre of the Carlin and Battle Mountain Trends.
Nevada Gold’s active Turquoise Ridge Mine, the third largest gold mine in the United States with 537,000 ounces of gold production reported in 2020, as well as the Twin Creeks open pit mines and the dormant Pinson and Getchell mines.
Element 79 has drilling programs announced for the 2023/24 years and a more vigorous program for 2024/25.
https://preview.redd.it/jm0ixwjhol0d1.png?width=943&format=png&auto=webp&s=e54f1368dac6eb4b173daed8f101989cd1ff26de
As (GoldSilver.com) an aside, the gold price—and silver—have softened after particularly gold had a decent run. The first two in our group have slid a bit but seem to be holding in nicely.
If one follows gold forecasts, the pundits call for USD 2500-3000 over the next few years. The strategy is simple: A move to USD 3,000 represents a 50% appreciation. However, that also comes with physical and liquidity issues should you want to sell.
And the Gold price?
On December 30, 2022, gold closed the year at $1,819.70 per ounce. Flash forward to one year later, and gold closed 2023 at $2,062.40. That’s a gain of 13.3% in a single year.
With gold pushing to new record highs, it’s a fascinating time for gold investors.
Predicting the future of gold prices is never easy, but to offer some insights into what 2024 might hold, we’ve (compiled an array of gold price forecasts, outlooks, and predictions from renowned banks, industry experts, and financial analysts.
Let’s take a look.
https://preview.redd.it/hvtfmvojol0d1.png?width=1270&format=png&auto=webp&s=e010811fe9a82a92ebcfbce86a0b8ef1a3ca60f8
Numero Three
https://preview.redd.it/c3piq1qlol0d1.png?width=368&format=png&auto=webp&s=5e03a374e70713d3d9c1d284149582b1bef3797d
Off we go to South America. This time, Columbia with SOMA Gold. (TSXV: SOMA) (WKN: A2P4DU) (OTC: SMAGF) (the “Company” or “Soma“) recently announced that gold production for Q1 2024 was 7,335 AuEq ounces, an increase of 8% over the same period in 2023.
Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
https://preview.redd.it/zs05p1jnol0d1.png?width=625&format=png&auto=webp&s=2495c1d6df13c2ef31100c031528f8e970d8940d
The Company owns two adjacent mining properties in Antioquia, Colombia, with a combined milling capacity of 675 tpd. (Permitted for 1,400 tpd). The El Bagre Mill is currently operating and producing. Internally generated funds are being used to finance a regional exploration program.
https://preview.redd.it/3oy5cbapol0d1.png?width=872&format=png&auto=webp&s=f777cb52c01985d3c554fabc0cd2eb42ca45cd89
Soma is further ahead than our previous companies, which doesn’t make it better; it is just a different stage of development.
Corporate Presentation, 2023 results, Tech Report.
https://preview.redd.it/39o70anqol0d1.png?width=729&format=png&auto=webp&s=d3542994b4fcfb9fdc0ee7150497a8df2bd2d448
Properties
Cardero Mine

• The 84 thousand tonnes (kt) production rate in 2022 will ramp up to a peak mining production rate of 248 kt (680 tpd) in 2024. Achieving the planned peak production rate of 248 kt per annum would allow the Company to restart its previously operating El Limon Mill, with feed from Cordero in late 2023.
• El Bagre Gold Mining Complex is located approximately 167 km northeast of Medellín in the Department of Antioquia, Colombia. Soma produced 23,115 ounces of gold at its El Bagre Mill in 2022, an increase of 30% from the previous year. Soma’s production forecast for 2023 is for a further 50% increase to 35,500 ounces of gold produced.
• In addition to its operating El Bagre Mill, Soma owns the 225 tpd Limon Mill, which is located 47 km south of the El Bagre Mill. The Limon Mill has been on care and maintenance since 2020 but will be restarted when production from the Cordero Mine exceeds the capacity of the El Bagre Mill.
• The Limon Mill operates similarly to the El Bagre Mill with two-stage crushing, ball milling, gravity concentration, flotation, cyanidation, Merrill Crowe precipitation, and smelting to produce doré. The mill was upgraded in 2017 to a capacity of 225 tpd and is permitted for up to 400 tpd.

As mentioned, these three companies are similar in that they have what appear to be skookum properties. They are also all great gold proxies, and they all trade for under CDN1.00. Cheekily, I may have said that investors can own all three companies for under CDN 2.00 a share.
While I like the companies, I would buy them for their land positions. All have land that isn’t some dust pit but has either historical or proven assays. And most are near large producers. Element79; Nevada.Carlin Trend? Seriously?

So, as of late I've been trying out a bunch of heroes to find who I want to main based on a few criteria. Mostly, what fits my play style and how much fun do I have doing it. Immersion is a big one too. But I'm trying to be flexible on that. But I've was a Viking since release with the exception of a few seasons here and there where I wanted to play with a friend and take territories together ya know? But I have full intentions on siding with the faction my main comes from.
Right now, my top contenders are Warlord, Conqueror, Shugoki, and Jorm. But I've found I prefer heroes with a full guard stance because, quite frankly, my reaction time is bad and so it's easier to just guard in one direction every time and block everything. And I prefer heavies because of their survivability and I only like objective game modes and playing for the objectives rather than kills and stuff (I've won so many games solely because I just sat on a point. No one even showed up lol)
So, I have a few questions about some of the other full guard heroes. Namely
Black Prior Valkyrie (though immersion is hard with female gender locked heroes. Hard to look at a female hero and go "this is me" ya know? But again, trying to be flexible) Kyoshin
Not so keen on Varangian Guard or Aramusha because their full guard has to be timed well.
Mainly, are they worth it? What are their strengths and weaknesses? How do they play?
Keep in mind some things I really like about the ones I'm playing now
Warlord: of course his full block stance, even though he's a "defensive" hero I can play him super aggressive. His headbutt is fantastic at dealing with turtles.
Conqueror: basically everything I said about Warlord. I love his infinite chain which is unblockable when they're heavy. The only thing I DONT like about him is his attacks are slow so I just get parried all day if I don't play SUPER defensive. And I prefer aggression.
Shugoki: it's the hugs. Delayed unblockable heavies are good and all, but giving a guy a hug and throwing him on the ground while my team wrecks him for 80% of his HP is great.
Jorm: Jorm is more of a "I want to get good with him" hero. The aggressiveness of Warlord and the disabling abilities of Shugoki, plus an infinite chain if I use his zone right. He's got everything except that full guard stance. So with him it's more that I want to get better at blocking, parrying, and feinting and then get good with him

Hey everyone!
I recently dove deep into the fascinating world of web unblockers and thought I'd share some insights that might just change how you see internet restrictions and web scraping. You might already know that web unblockers are like secret passageways that let you sneak past internet censorship or geofencing. Think of them as VPNs on steroids, allowing not just encrypted data transfer for privacy but also unrestricted browsing freedom.
But here's where it gets really interesting, especially for folks in the web scraping arena. Web unblockers serve as these powerful APIs designed to outsmart anti-bot protections. They’re like the ninjas of the internet, using tactics such as IP rotation, browser fingerprinting, CAPTCHA solving, and even Javascript rendering to access the data we need.
Now, you might think a proxy does the job by changing your IP address. But web unblockers? They're the whole package, offering a bunch more than just a disguise. Yet, it's not all smooth sailing. No single web unblocker can claim victory over every anti-bot mechanism out there. Tech giants like Cloudflare are in constant evolution, crafting more complex defenses to keep bots at bay.
This is exactly why I conducted the Great Web Unblocker Benchmark. It's a showdown to see how different web unblockers stack up against the toughest anti-bot solutions in the wild. Sure, there's a price tag attached to these unblockers, but picking the right one isn't just about spending money—it's about investing in seamless data access for our projects.
In the end, the key takeaway is weighing the cost against the potential to maintain an uninterrupted data flow for our customers. Let's keep pushing the envelope and finding the best tools to navigate these challenges together.
Cheers to an open and accessible web for all our scraping needs!
Linkt to the full article: https://substack.thewebscraping.club/p/what-is-a-web-unblocker

TW // Grooming?
Back when I was thirteen I made a post asking people if they thought I was ugly because my step-sister and I thought it would be interesting and funny to see what people would say.
Shortly after making that post I got a DM from a guy on a throwaway account who acted concerned about a post I had made a few months earlier (the post was a vent and nothing short of worrying). I started chatting with him and he asked me a bunch of questions--things like whether or not I had people to confide in, what my home life was like, etc. It was during the pandemic and I didn't really have anyone to talk to so it made me happy to chat with him so our conversations continued.
After some talking, he started pressuring me to send him nudes. I kept trying to tell him I didn't want to but he would tell me that he would stop chatting with me if I didn't send him any. This back and forth went on for a bit before I almost gave in. He then messaged me saying that he was actually doing all this to teach me what grooming was and how to protect myself from it.
After that we chatted a bit more before a day later he did the same song and dance that he did the day before, complete with the stopping just before I broke and pulling the same "I was just pretending to teach you" line. It was confusing and it made me feel sick to my stomach so I blocked him for a bit.
Him being blocked didn't last long because I missed how nice he could be, so I unblocked him a few days later. I told him how it made me feel and he told me that he'd done this "pretending to ask for nudes to teach you to protect yourself from grooming" thing to other people before and that a few of them even view him as father-figure. He told me that if I did truly want it he'd be in a relationship with me, but not if I was only doing it to make him keep talking to me. I found this a bit weird but I brushed it off because, again, he was nice sometimes. We messaged back and forth for a few weeks after that before I just stopped talking with him.
When I look back on it in hindsight, I have a few theories on why this whole thing happened.

1. The one that I believe the most is that he was an FBI agent. Out of context this sounds unlikely but let me explain. A month earlier, I had been chatting with a grown man on twitter. The exchanges between us were inappropriate and eventually my parents found out and they made me stop using twitter. A bit after my parents found out they told me that apparently the FBI was investigating this guy and asked me if I wanted to testify against him. I chose not to. However, I think that it could be possibly be someone trying to teach me a lesson? (Though I could also be reading too much into it but I think the coincidence of it all is kinda weird.)
2. For a bit I wondered if it could be one of my parents--mainly my dad--who was trying to teach me a lesson. But I'm pretty sure that was mostly just me being paranoid because I doubt my dad even knows what the concept of a throwaway account is.
3. It could just be a really weird guy who was doing this to actually teach me a lesson or doing this for some weird kind of fetish.

None of these I'm completely set on because the whole thing was just really weird and confusing.
Most of the time when I explain this situation to people they make fun of me for not just blocking him permanently. But the thing is when this happened I had literally no one who was my friend, no one to confide in. Because it had been during the pandemic I barely texted the friends I had had before the pandemic started and they barely texted me either. My parents aren't great people and my step-siblings hated me and made me hate myself. And it wasn't like I could go out and meet people either. So when someone gave me the slightest bit of attention and didn't hate me for being too talkative, too loud, too energetic, too cringey, too annoying it made me feel like I was on top of the world. He would say the nicest things that anyone had ever said to me. He would tell me things like how if he could meet me in person and I thought I was being too annoying that he would just hug me and tell me that it's okay. And I fell hook line and sinker for it.

I’ve seen a lot of ladies saying they hate their nostrils, or they hate the arch of their nose, or it’s too big.
Ladies… I don’t know if this insecurity has to do with men, and the idea that men won’t like your nose.
But if that is the concern, I have good news.
That idea is dogshit. Your nose is fantastic.
Straight men are attracted to feminine traits, and despite what you may have been led to believe, there isn’t one nose type that is more feminine than another. There are face shapes that are arguably more feminine. High contrast in your face is good (hence makeup). A feminine figure is fantastic. But a feminine nose? What is that? Smaller?
I submit that if there’s a guy who decides he likes only smaller noses, he isn’t a man who likes actual women. He like anime cartoons. Because flesh and blood women have all kinds of noses, and almost all of them are great. Big arch? That’s regal. You look like royalty. Large nostrils? Awesome, she can probably breathe really well. Your nose doesn’t have to be a dainty lil’ ski slope for men to like your face. It’ll be way more about the clarity of your skin, the brightness of your eyes. Your nose is great. More than great. I don’t think I’m alone when I say I prefer a prominent nose on a woman.
If the insecurity you’re facing has anything to do with what men will think, then you can rest easy. “Nose” isn’t anywhere near the top 20 things a guy will first notice.
If anything, just focus on your health. Literally ALL the things men think they’re attracted to are quick proxies for health. That’s what they’re looking for, whether they realize it or not. If you’re healthy, strong, and happy, you’ll radiate attractiveness to any man around you. That’s really all it takes.

Hi there, I’m actively losing my mind over here and am desperate for help 😅
I keep having this reoccurring issue where I’ll be editing normally, things will be running just fine, then all of a sudden FCP just totally locks up and becomes unresponsive to any clicks, commands, any efforts to quit (outside of a force quit via a different window), nor will the top or bottom menu even appear. But it’s not a “crash”—the program will stay open and active indefinitely. Nor is it a traditional freeze—there is no beach ball and the program does not show “unresponsive”, nor does anything in the activity monitor look weird.
I have no rhyme or reason as to why or when it’ll happen, but more often than not it will randomly happen right as I’m pressing space to play after making basic edits. Most times it happens right after the video starts playing and the video will literally play as normal and KEEP playing as if nothing is wrong (play head will move and everything) despite the fact that, by all appearances, the program is totally locked up and not responding to anything I do. It’ll play and play (audio and all) until I command over to another window to force quit—no error messages, no crash, no beach ball, no “not responsive” in activity monitor / application menu, nothing. And only force quitting will close it.
It used to happen every now and then but recently, for whatever reason, it’s happening literally every 10-20 minutes, sometimes sooner, and I’m avoiding finishing projects like the plague bc of the frustration. It happened in my last project too, just not this much.
I’ve done everything I know how. I’ve deleted preferences (which has never actually solved anything for me in general lol). I’ve restarted. I’ve updated plugins. I’ve removed them and put them back in. I’ve swapped the project folder location to and from my internal and external storage (yes, it’s formatted correctly, and yes I have lots of space on both hard drives) and it happens the same regardless. I even downloaded the last update to MacOS just as a Hail Mary but it continued. I’ve not changed anything I can think of that would make this happen so often all of a sudden nor have I started using any new plugins recently. No, I don’t use Chrome, nor CleanMyMac.
I used ProRes proxy media in my last project thinking it would help since my camera footage is 4k h.265 (which apparently FCP doesn’t love) but it really didn’t change anything. This current project actually runs extremely smoothly so far even without proxy and my CPU/RAM usage are laughably small so it’s clearly not a matter of the computer working too hard. In fact, funnily enough, the project runs very smoothly set to “better quality” but somehow performs noticeably WORSE when “better performance” is selected which 😂😅 and regardless of which is used, this locking up issue still happens.
What could be causing this? And has anyone else experienced this? I can’t find anyone else online talking about it anywhere so I’m afraid I’m uniquely cursed 😅
I really appreciate anyone who reads this and gives me any insight in any way! 🙏🏻
Computer Details: 2021 MacBook Pro 16” M1 Max Chip 32GB of RAM 720GB of storage free out of 1TB macOS Sonoma 14.4.1 (happened on 14.3 too) Latest FCPX Version (10.7.1)

Disclaimer: I am not a financial advisor, this is not financial advice. I do not have any affiliation with any financial group or company. I am an individual retail investor that holds a significant number of shares in $ICU.
This was a decent filing. It wasn't great, but it wasn't bad either. My sentiment turns slightly more bullish based on the info I read and my interpretation. I will detail that below.
Cash position: Cash burn improved this quarter compared to the same quarter in 2023. We are burning $613,000 less cash. Overall, the balance sheet has significantly improved. We used a large part of the $9 million offering to clear some big debts and liabilities. Kudos to David A. Green, our CFO. Our loss per share has decreased from 54 cents lost per share to 19 cents lost per share. We didn't beat earnings estimate, but who cares about one missed earnings in the long run, especially when talking about that much improvement over a 1 year period.
We currently have $5 million in hand on cash, and it looks like we should anticipate cash burn over the next quarter of approximately $3.95 million. This isn't great, but this is also a pretty damn small number to overcome with revenue. Consider the stated cost of the Quellimmune device, $10k-$20k per treatment. Some very simple math that ignores a lot of other variables means 395 units sold treatments performed gets us to break even on cash flow. I'll be honest, this is almost enough to hope to think we might be able to beat a reverse split. If the timeline wasn't so damn tight, anyway. However, additional extensions are possible and improving our cash position like this certainly helps.

U.S. pediatric patient population estimated at 4,000 annually

Okay, you can't tell me that this doesn't get you a little bit excited, right? A market share of 4000 annually, we only need to sell ~395 SCD treatment courses/quarter to break even on quarterly cash flow, and we are the ONLY company that has a product that treats this population.
Commercialization: I'm not thrilled with the stated progress here, but I think that may be due to my own impatience. To date, we don't know how many, if any, units have been sold. All the signs are pointing to zero units sold.

As we guided in late February, we expect initial sales in the coming weeks

As u/Master_inside4685 pointed out, this statement was technically made in March, so the timeline of what "in the coming weeks" means isn't clear. It could refer to weeks that we are now past, it could also mean a couple weeks from today. I'd like more clear communication on this.
Generally though, let us remember that FDA approval was given in February. That was only 3 months ago. Nuwellis has the sales team in place and an exclusive contract to commercialize the product. They will certainly take some profit off the top for themselves, but I am confident that they are prepared to move product quickly. It isn't clear why that hasn't happened yet, but I digress, I already dug into that above.
Adult product trials: Adult trials have not begun. Patients are still enrolling, see the quote below. There are 31 adults enrolled in the active adult trials with up to 200 expected. It was 24 in April.

The NEUTRALIZE-AKI trial is expected to enroll up to 200 patients at up to 30 U.S. medical centers.

Keyword here is expected. This indicates what I stated above.

The Company expects to receive regulatory approval under a Premarket Approval (PMA) application for the SCD-ADULT in the second half of 2025 and to launch the product in the first half of 2026.

This is your big catalyst right here. Mark this down. I've said it a few times now, the long term bullishness comes from the adult device and the market share for that device. July 2025 to July 2026.
That's all I have for now. Don't forget to review the DEF14/A prior to voting. Deadline is June 4th. I recommend reaching out to your brokerage's customer service team if you have yet to receive your proxy vote information.

hey guys, hope your all doing well. So ive been playing the game for a bit over 4 months now and its been a few weeks since I switched from support to top lane. I watched a ton of guides by aloisnl and mainly play gwen. The issue is that I pretty much always get bullied in the laning phase and feel as if I have no agency in the end game. I think my win rate dropped from 58% to around 30ish and was really hoping to get some tips. My op.gg is Caramel#9257. also some specific questions I have are

1. how to break a freeze
2. when to proxy
3. what to do when opponent kinda sits under tower after laning phase. its kind of hard for me to split and take tier 2 when they just sit under there.
4. how to play from behind
5. how do i link a gameplay video? i feel like itd be easier for yall to understand if i have a video but i have no idea how the client works or how to link stuff.
6. what do i do in team fights? feel like i get blown up instantly even by their tanks or top laners through my w

thx in advance

Dear editor community,
I desperately need some recommendations to improve my workflow. I edit videos that utilize stock footage + .png images on top of stock + animations, which I do in After effects. (everything is sourced of stock sites in addition to text etc."
So my workflow is:

• Create a storyboard of what I want to animate and what I want to use stock footage for
• I download everything and put it into Premiere where it's supposed to be (making quicktime proxies), just still and no movement yet.
• The things I need animated I beem in after effects and render and replace after I'm done. Smaller things I use the transform effect in Premiere itself. Like images flying in etc.
• I nest all the sequences and do my "meta layer" work like zooming into details or adding a vignette and so on.

Now, this leaves me with so so so much nested sequences and then I have a hard time adding transitions on top of that. I'm even as far as contemplating just editing these 6 minute videos in After Effects altogether. Does anybody have some tips to improve my workflow?
Maybe I'm just being stupid and it's obvious but please, any advice is welcome.

Welcome, fellow 40k data nerds, to another Stat Check Meta Dashboard Update! We’ve made one very important update to the dashboard. You can find the newly updated best free tools for 40k meta analysis on our website:

• Stat Check - Meta Data Dashboard
• Stat Check - Player Elo Scores

If you like our work and consider it useful, feel free to join us on Patreon and join our Discord!
Follow us on YouTube to see the latest episodes of our flagship show Stat Check, Enter the Matrix (Team 40k analysis from some of the best players in the world), and Take All Comers (where a trio of young, skilled players walk us through their competitive approaches to list-building and improvement). Today's episode of Stat Check will feature a rundown of the new Chaos Space Marine rules, following last week's rundown of the Ork Codex. Tune in here!
I’ve copied a table with one half of our State of the Meta Dashboard tab below for our mobile users. You can find images of the rest of the dashboard’s tabs here: Dashboard Images

Faction	Win Rate	OverRep	4-0 Event Start	Event Wins	Player Population
Space Wolves	64%	2.86	6%	1	3%
Chaos Daemons	63%	0.61	6%	0	2%
Grey Knights	61%	1.79	13%	3	6%
Black Templars	60%	0.85	9%	1	3%
Genestealer Cults	58%	0.00	0%	0	1%
Necrons	55%	1.65	9%	3	8%
Thousand Sons	54%	0.97	7%	2	5%
Orks	54%	1.95	10%	3	8%
Chaos Space Marines	53%	0.46	5%	1	3%
Adepta Sororitas	53%	0.41	8%	0	4%
Blood Angels	52%	1.15	12%	0	5%
Drukhari	51%	2.25	8%	0	2%
Imperial Knights	50%	0.49	0%	0	3%
Adeptus Mechanicus	50%	2.43	0%	0	1%
World Eaters	50%	1.43	6%	0	5%
T'au Empire	49%	0.83	9%	1	5%
Death Guard	49%	0.39	4%	0	4%
Aeldari	47%	0.94	10%	1	5%
Astra Militarum	46%	0.91	0%	0	5%
Tyranids	44%	0.00	3%	0	5%
Adeptus Custodes	42%	0.42	0%	0	3%
Chaos Knights	42%	0.49	5%	0	3%
Space Marines	39%	0.46	0%	0	6%
Leagues of Votann	39%	0.00	0%	0	3%
Dark Angels	34%	0.54	6%	1	3%
Deathwatch	25%	0.00	0%	0	0%

We're over 3,000 games into the post data-slate meta, and a few things have become clear:

• The Ork codex is as strong as initially suspected. Green Tide and War Horde have some positive leading indicators, while Bully Boyz appears to be the real deal. At 143 games played, BBz are sitting at a 58% Win Rate, 2.6 OverRep, 14% of its players going 4-0 to start their events, and 2 event wins.
• The Necron's Canoptek Court detachment is still going strong. At 93 games played, it's posted a 64% Win Rate, 2.92 OverRep, 15% of players starting 4-0, and 2 event wins.
• Custodes have likely disappeared as a competitive option altogether, and have quite literally disappeared from the "Faction Win Rate - Peer vs. Peer" tab due to an abysmal 23% win rate among upper quartile Elo players.
• Kyle Grundy has put Kroot nay-sayers on notice, going 4-1 with the Kroot Hunting Pack Detachment!

We've made a pretty significant update to the dashboard that we're very excited about. For the past two years (good lord, it's been that long), we've used the Player and Opponent Experience filters as a proxy for player skill, operating under the assumption that more events played = continued improvement for most players. As of a few weeks ago, we've retired those filters and replaced them with Player and Opponent Elo Percentile sliders. If you're looking for a rundown on Elo in 40k, check out our explainer article on Goonhammer
From now on, you'll be able to adjust your view of the meta for a given skill level. Brand new to the game and humbly assuming you're probably not that good yet? Set the max percentile to 25 for both Player and Opponent to see what the meta looks like for players who are still trying to figure the game out. Are you an established player who's routinely X-1, gunning for that 5-0 finish? Set the minimum for both Player and Opponent to 90 or 95 to get a more refined view of what competition looks like in your rarefied air. As always, these filters interact with all the others so that you can get as specific or as broad as you'd like.
Given the Elo update to the dashboard, We've adjusted the "Win Rate - Peer vs. Peer" tab to use win rates for games within the bottom and top quartiles instead of win rates within the now-deprecated "Newcomer" and "Veteran" buckets. We've also added another tab - Win Rates by Peer Elo Decile. This tab displays the WR and total games played for each faction within a given Elo decile, along with games played between players at the 99th+ percentile. This helps illuminate the degree to which there are performance differences across player skill levels for a given faction.
Looks like CSM got the good writer. Meta's gonna get real wonky over the next few weeks.
We’ll be lurking in the comments, so feel free to reach out with questions, comments, critique, or requests for clarification. Until next week, good luck with your games, and don’t forget to keep fun first while you’re playing.

As you may remember Spruce Power (XL Fleet back then) went public through a merger with SPAC.
SPAC shares were at $80.40 before the merger, then management released a proxy report about XL Fleet and the price peaked at $238 in December 2020.
The merger closed on December 21, 2020. Just weeks later, Muddy Waters Research issued a report, revealing that the Proxy contained false and misleading information. That news caused the stock price to drop to nearly $17 per share. And on top of that XL Fleet disclosed that it was under investigation by the SEC.
Subsequently, investors filed a lawsuit to demand compensation for fraud. And just recently Spuce Power agreed to pay a $19.5M settlement to the shareholders to end the litigation. Attorney fees will be 33% but the rest is going to shareholders.
The whole situation is a complete crap, but investors will get at least some money back.
If you have been trading XL/PIC you can request the payout [here].

This is not meant to be a negative post, but rather a feedback one from someone who stopped playing Singularity for this very reason.
For those who didn't know, Vecna has four powers: Fly (more of a dash), Blocking pallets (for 4 seconds), Sphere orb thingy (reveals survivors & disables items in its path), and Entity attack (flying skeletons that travel similar to Artist's crows). Pretty cool, right? Good variety, not too strong but fun.
The problem lies in the magic items. Similar to Singularity's EMP boxes, Vecna comes with magic chests that carry magic items. These items do not take up an item slot, and you can have up to 2 (or even 3) equipped at the same time, even if you're already carrying a normal item such as a flashlight or a medkit.
What's the problem? Well, these magic items pretty much hard counter Vecna. For example, one of the items makes it so you can see the aura of the Entity Attack thing as soon as it's placed down, so you'll know where to expect it. Not only that, but this attack can also be countered by... crouching. If you crouch at the right time, they simply cannot hit you.
His other powers are also pretty underwhelming at the moment. He blocks pallets, but by doing so, you're slowed down to a halt and the survivor can just hold W, and at long loops, the 4-second block is not enough to loop even once before it unblocks. His fly is similar; once you stop flying, you're slowed down to crawling speed for a few seconds. And his Entity attack is so spread out, it's extremely easy to dodge or just crouch. This, of course, on top of items that already counter each and every one of his powers.
Again, this isn't meant to be a negative post. He's an extremely fun killer to play as, he has a damn power wheel! Feels like I'm playing Dishonored all over again, but if his powers were just a tiny bit better, it would be more viable once the hype dies down and everyone goes back to playing sweaty.
From all the matches I've played as him today, I've gotta say, Vecna is the most enjoyable PTB killer I've played. He's hands down the most fun killer in the whole game. I LOVE the power wheel! Choosing your ability on the fly adds a whole new level of excitement (seriously, Knight could learn a thing or two from this). I'm genuinely pumped for the final release and really hoping they give Vecna the buffs he needs!

Hi,
I'm (31M) preparing to see my partner (P, 34NB) for the first time in a year. I'm pretty excited as I have missed them.
Currently they are on a vacation in the capital city of my country (which is considerable distance away) with Meta (M) and some friends, and will be meeting me and staying with me later on. We have had a bit of an argument over P boundary setting with me regarding meeting arrangements and this has made me felt less confident about our date week as a whole.
The situation feels a bit personal for myself because I have GAD, a disability and am neurodivergent with comorbid executive dysfunction issues. I personally think that the ED is a significant stressor for Partner, maybe even more than my mental health! Although I am not sure why this is.
I can somewhat understand why executive functioning is a sore spot and important. In general booking flights, trains, hotels etc. can be really stressful and overwhelming for me, and while a general problem, this is obviously a problem in an LDR especially. There is also P's work schedule to consider. I wish we had more autonomy but I can't and in fact right now I'm not even *allowed* to drive.
So what happened: my polycule suggested this UK meet months ago, and I was keen, but this was at the time just an idea. The plan was always to meet P, M et. al. after their break in capital city A in city B and then for the group to split so that P and I could do our own thing separately.
For various unfortunate reasons though (including awaiting an appointment for surgery and my social security review) I was first unable to commit until 2 weeks ago, when I had a hospital appointment (which was almost a 5 minute waste of time but that's another story) and then procrastinated on reserving hotels. (I was especially scared of being discharged if I rescheduled, and as a disabled person I am just scared of my government who frankly dislike and scapegoat disabled people.) I was also insecure about meeting meta and especially the friends. Finally money was both an issue and something I was pretending was not for reasons I'll explain below.
P tried to help me with hotel reservation but we were unable to complete it before they left their country last weekend. I can't remember why; I'm ashamed to say I might have just got distracted and panicked...
I have since had a busy/exhausting week engaged with advocacy service, family birthdays, therapy and a planned outing with friends--and so has P, with work before leaving and with the trip after. P suggested meeting me halfway at city C, and we could have a day trip there.
I had felt overwhelmed by the decision, so asked for help from my friends. Both my friends and partner kept emphasising that reservations as well as the kinds of long-haul trains I wanted would be 'expensive' and basically talking out of our plan B and plan C. It seems as if my not spending was the major consideration. At risk of sounding both privileged and irresponsible, which maybe I am; from a self-confidence standpoint I care less about spending a lot of money as a) proving to myself I can do these things and b) treating my partner to a nice experience after so long away from each other.
However I am also quite a people pleaser, especially towards P. Additionally deadlines absolutely cause me to panic and any form of timekeeping pressure. So if somebody shares an opinion strongly then I tend to just mirror them. This can often be a problem with Partner who has quite a lot of strong opinions and values, and also can be easily frustrated. They can also be impatient although I want to caveat that in many ways they have been *very* patient with me. It's hard to process. I keep wanting to blame myself or them. The point is that I don't like arguing with people and will let them talk me out of a situation if it means avoiding a fight. (I know this is a trauma response from my abandonment issues and seeing my parents fight while divorcing as a kid)
Partner initially said that since they were now spending time with meta they were unavailable and it was up to me to decide and plan my own arrangements. However they more or less suddenly changed their mind *the next day*, and said that they had to consider their own needs, had ditched any plans with me beyond meeting me at my home (plan D) and will meet me at my home this weekend.
I absolutely understand why P was stressed about pinning down a meet up date, place and time. Despite being completely fluent, they would be travelling in a foreign country after all. Perhaps I had been stubborn about 'wanting to see Meta and friends' while not considering or committing to the logistics of that, which I knew would exhaust me.
The problem was this flip in...willingness to grant me autonomy happened so suddenly I had no time to process it. I was on a bus home at the time. The period between "I think we should drop the holiday" and "I've bought a train directly to yours, meet me" was about 5-10 minutes of streaming IMs where I was in freeze response and unable to really engage.
Although they didn't see it (instead my friend did) I had a complete meltdown and panic attack as in my mind this was failure. I was already doing toxic comparison to Meta (who is wealthier, more relationally experienced, and has greater connections in the poly scene). My hometown is...it's a dump. I mean my local area is nice enough but...it's not a capital city or city break. I sense this is toxic but . Again it feels like personal failure, especially as I had told my family and *even my therapist and social worker* about the plans. So there is embarrassment on top of it, like disappointing P is disappointing *them* by proxy. Further I'm worrying that the fact I think P might even 'need' the entertainment of a big city is being sexist (and so misgendering). Finally I'm struggling to think of alternatives since I doubt they will want to spend the whole time in my apartment.
Nor is this the first time I have had a meltdown due to P being frustrated with how slow, tardy, indecisive I can get. In fact one happened when we went on vacation last year...because I took too long in the toilet before we left for the train. So...yeah, I know how important punctuality and efficiency is to P but I...still got caught off guard this time.
I spoke to my therapist today I'm thinking about whether it'd be good for us to have a one-off 'couples therapy' with my therapist (with P attending) and what I need to ask from my therapist. Fortunately my therapist is poly informed and practises it, which I think will help. However I don't think this is about 'poly' exactly, it seems to be about my own difficulties.
Beyond this I'm not sure what to do. Honestly I don't want to disturb P but also? This incident has caused me to check out of interest in their time with M and friends beforehand, (which I was previously following with interest) and lose some compersion. I have the distressed part of my brain telling me that I can avoid disappointing people if I just let them take control of everything and never say No or speak up. Especially with P it has seemed for a while that the best way to avoid annoying them is to just let them take the lead, because me trying to exercise my own autonomy just causes analysis paralysis and arguments leading to panic attacks/meltdowns/shame spirals...and tbqh that happens with everyone in my life which suggests it's a me problem. Generally I'm just low energy now, I'm tired and didn't sleep well or much.
I am worried I'm going to get dumped, and I am worried that this would be proof that I am not fit for at least poly dating if not dating in general. My mind takes P and M as representative of 'the ideal ENM individual' (read: high agency, extremely independent, values autonomy, effortless boundaries/assertiveness, highly efficient/no EF issues etc.) and I am projecting all of my insecurities and deficit in these faculties onto the whole damn scene.
How much of this boils down to bad communication, RSD and internalised ableism? Idk. I can tell that my mind is on a worry train now, and this whole thing is yet again as much about proving myself as capable to people as being in the moment. I worry that I won't be able to mentally solve this issue and I *have* to let go. Right now I need to clean this place up a little before the weekend. Any help appreciated

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I know we're still probably a decade or two away from seeing this site being used at 2/3 of its original size, but it is really cool to see it being redeveloped and reactivated.