The trinity is one of the main topics the INC focuses on, and in every argument/debate i've seen is nothing but a misrepresentation of what Christians (Catholics, Orthodox, and Protestants) believe in the Trinity. This thread is for this purpose of denouncing the lies of the INC in regards to this topic.
I will not give everything off in one post so that people will not get turned off with being introduced to a wall of text so as this thread progresses, more content will drop in.

1) Is the word Trinity in the Bible?

Answer is no. However, this is not a good argument because the word "Bible" and "Epistles" are not found in scripture either. These are words were later made to give a name for certain things taught in the Bible. "Epistle" was made to give a name to all of paul's letters, the word "Bible" was made to give a word for the compiled OT and NT. Likewise, the word "Trinity" was made to have a word for the 3 different persons of God described in the bible.
In the Bible, it was called "the Godhead" Colossians 2:9-10 - In him dwells the fullness of the Godhead.

1. The word "God" in hebrew is Elohim. In one of James_Readme's threads, I asked him as to what the hebrew word for God is, which he chose not respond to. Here is the reason why, if you read the book of Isaiah, you'll see a class of angels such as Cherub and Cherubim, the difference between the two is that Cherub is singular while Cherubim is plural. Same thing with Seraph and Seraphim. In hebrew, anything that ends with an IM is masculine plural, there ElohIM is plural. God is a plural word.

Genesis 1:26 God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness

2) Isaiah 45:5

I am the LORD, and there is no other; apart from me there is no God.
When the INC uses this verse, they are misrepresenting and being dishonest as to what we believe the Trinity to be. We believe the Trinity is 1 God.
Matt 28:19: baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. It says "Name" (singular) not "Names"
John 10:30, I and the Father are one.
John 1:1 - The Word was with God and the Word was God
The Bible shows that there is only 1 God, but it describes 3 different essences of this one God. Therefore since the Bible teaches the Father, Son, and HS to be one God then obvious Isaiah 45:5 is applicable (has always been applicable) to the triune God. Again, go back to the hebrew word for God being "ElohIM".

3) Jesus says the Father is my God

John 20:17 - ‘I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’”
This is a complicated one, because it will require to understand the nature of Jesus. Being God and Man. When Jesus became man, he took our nature and became submissive to the Father
Hebrews 2:9 - What we do see is Jesus, *who for a little while was given a position 'a little lower than the angels'
Yes, Jesus called the Father God, and likewise God the Father calls Jesus God.
Hebrews 1: 8 - But of the Son he says, “Your throne, O God, is forever and ever.....
Now, the INC posted a "rebuttal" to this https://incmedia.org/does-hebrews-18-call-jesus-god/

Brother Bob: So dear friends, who is this prophecy all about? In Hebrews 1:8, Apostle Paul was simply quoting this: Psalm 45:6-7, “to the Son He says ‘Your throne, O God**,**” and you know, it’s in this portion of the verse is why people draw the conclusion and think that God is calling Jesus God. But, let’s go back again to Hebrews 1:8 and include verse 9 with it this time, because that is so very important to do, it reads this way, including verse 9:

This is a poor rebuttal.
First, this Bob guy doesn't explain is what/who that Psalms 45 prophecy is about. It's a Messianic Prophecy, so even back then in Psalms Jesus is already being called God. This INC minister is not answering as to who is that "God" and why is the Father using that prophecy in reference to the son.

Now, False preachers, they will only read verse 8, leave out verse 9, You have loved righteousness and hated lawlessness; Therefore God, Your God, has anointed You With the oil of gladness more than Your companions.”
[Hebrews 1:8-9 New King James Version]
Brother Bob: So dear friends, it is made clear here in verse 9, that to the son, whom God is referring to, is one who has a God. The true God does not have another God, or else there would be two Gods. Hebrews 1:8-9 is simply, then, an important prophecy about the Son who was anointed with the oil of gladness, and who hates lawlessness and loves righteousness.

Verse 9 just proves our point. This isn't implying "another God" but both the Father and the Son to be God. Next, this guy leaves out v10-13 that helps affirm that this entire chapter is showing the Father and Son to be equally 1 God.
V10: HE (God) ALSO SAYS: In the beginning, Lord, you laid the foundations of the earth, and the heavens are the work of your hands.
Who is the Father referring to as Lord, who laid the foundations of the earth?
then in v13, “Sit at my right hand, until I make your enemies, a footstool for your feet" This is quoting Psalm 110:1, which begins with "and the Lord said to my Lord, sit at my right hand..." Who is this Lord?
Another reason why this Bob person is wrong is because even the muslims will say Hebrews 1 has the Father calling Jesus God. If you go to the Muslim sub and ask them what do they think of Paul, they will bash him for being a false prophet. The muslims think Paul is the guy who started the belief of the trinity and they use this verse as an example of the "corruption" made by Paul . That is why they reject the NT, that is why they claim the Quran was sent by God --because the NT was corrupted. So even they know what the actual message of this chapter is.

The INC will play games as much as they want, but in the end they have to prove why their church has credibility. They are a church made by filipinos and believed by only filipinos, and they are not only contending with 2000 years of christian teachings but they are basing their stance on a bunch of books that were compiled and translated by churches they consider as "false teachers".
I'll leave this for now, there are other things such as Matthew 24:36 and other verses which i will get through some other time.

Was doing some reading in the production of the film "American Splendor" and I came across this quote from Joyce Brabner: . “I’d say Letterman really got painted into a corner, thwarting his opportunities to be creative,” she tells Comic Riffs. “People think the show gave Letterman an opportunity, but they don’t see the table with 10 guys in shorts wearing baseball caps pitching jokes for things for him to say. They don’t see the index cards that say: ‘Ask this first.’ It’s all spelled out for him, and everything is pre-interviews. He’s basically had to be this hand puppet, with everybody’s hands up his butt to tell him what to say and do." . I guess I was really naive in believing that Letterman still had autonomy and was doing most of the directing on what his show should be. This is disappointing if true because I really liked Dave's quick wit and smart aleck dry humor.

I have a Friend who is a Writter, but not only they never publish any of their stories. When we stop so they can tell the stories tho, it's always about their character's suffering even tho they don't deserve it. They also mention how every character is based on themselves, and I personally believe that's why they're all so perfect, They write them as themselves, but keeps the flaws out and the only way to make the character "interesting" for "The public" is to make them Suffer.
Some friends of them, Me and some of their Teachers have mentioned how they need to stop, but we all just talk about it because of the writing itself. We say people won't be interested in characters that suffer if EVERY character suffers. Is like that quote from Syndrome from the Incredibles (2004) "Everyone can be a super! And when everyone’s super… no one will be."
I personally find concerning because recently I figured this might be related to something more psychological than just artistical and I wanted to talk about it with someone who actually knows a thing or two about the human psychic and not just someone who will agree or disagree with everything I say about it like they do, by saying "The suffering is necessary for character development"
Plus, I don't know if this helps the case or not, But they also have a Fixation for the medieval times, all of their stories takes place there, even tho they don't really care, and still put some phones and technology on them

Hello! This might possibly be a stupid question but please humor me because I’m clueless. I have multiple tattoos but they were all very impulsive walk ins and very very simple. I have never actually planned one out before and I have zero artistic ability to draw what I am wanting.
How do I go about this? I have a vague picture in my head of what I want. As in, I have the scene planned out but not details. Is it normal to meet with the artist and just describe what I’m thinking with absolutely zero reference photos? How exactly do I go about finding an artist to do this? What do I say when I reach out, that I have an idea for a tattoo but I need them to actually draw what I’m thinking?
Again I’m really really sorry if this is a dumb question, I have very bad social anxiety and I feel out of my element.

First, for context; I was raised in a household where I would get either physically or mentally beaten if I did something wrong. For example, if I were to talk back to my mother she would mentally hurt me, which is why I have a low ego and constant suicidal thoughts. Now I'm an even worse person who gets mad every time someone comes into my room.
My mom believes that I am an asshole and I do too. I also get mad when anyone touches me without permission, causing me to flinch back and make them either worried or upset. I have lashed out at my own mother for touching me multiple times without permission and she tends to insult me when I do so.
I do have feelings, I'm not some emotionless person who doesn't care about anyone at all, (Not that people who hide their emotions are all like that) but I like to keep my bad emotions hidden since I used to get bullied for being the crybaby. My bad emotions are saved until I'm at home and reading, that's when I let all my bad emotions out. Nobody cares about how I'm doing (if I'm feeling bad), and I enjoy that lack of attention; which is why I like keeping my emotions hidden.
I found a quote that perfectly describes how I am in public: Chin up, Princess, or the crown slips. I'm not sure where it comes from, or who said it, but in my mind I'm always saying to myself Don't show your emotions, or you'll face bullying again. I hate myself for this, but I feel I should get over it.
Anyways, enough backstory, I just accidentally hurt my dog because I was mad, but gave her some treats right after because I felt bad. I feel like an asshole because I feel like I mentally hurt everyone around me. I don't deserve anyone who's nice to me because I just put on a mask so I can keep friends. I'm the definition of a faker and I don't get why I'm still alive if I just hurt everyone around me. I take everyone for granted and if they get mad at me my mask just slips off. The only negative emotion I show in public is anger and even when I do show my anger I just get backlash anyways so I always try to apologise either the next day or in the next 2 hours. Sorry to anyone who's actually taking time out of their day to read this, I know it's long. I've been forgotten by my father, who left when I was born; He doesn't even have partial custody and he forgot that I exist, leading him to forget my birthday last year. I'm basically the opposite of a narcissist, (for anyone reading this who doesn't know what a narcissist is: it's someone who has too high of an ego) meaning I hate everything about me, from my mind to my body to my personality to my life. I have thoughts of death every day and I know most people want long happy lives, but I don't.
I kind of just feel the want to get on a private jet as the pilot and purposely crash the plane.
I do self harm, but not cutting, I'll get into that later. I already have the tools to hurt myself. I sometimes pick at my body while finding everything that people hate about me, even if they don't say it. I honestly am a brat, and my mom is so helpful at cheering me up. Lies. She is awesome at making me feel better about myself. Lies. My dad is always there for me. Lies. My life is absolutely awesome. More lies. I honestly hate everything about me, like I already said. I feel like everyone I love is so happy and has a great life, other than this one friends of mine who is going through the same thing as me. We both seemed to have started getting suicidal thoughts for the same reasons. Our grandparents hate us (In my case grandparent) and they treat us like dog shit as if we're not human. We also started having these thoughts at the beginning of our fourth grade year (In which we were in the same class.) The only two things keeping me alive right now is that I'm a fucking pussy who can't act on her thoughts, and that I have things to research that I wish I had. A recent example was a study of skin cancer. I believe I have a disorder called Body Dysmorphia, meaning I see my body as a very disoriented version of it. People say I'm skinny but when I look in a mirror I see something different. I enjoy starving myself, which is one of the only types of self harm I do; The other type of self harm consists of picking at my skin with any objects that will pinch, basically I would use a crabs claw if I got that desperate to feel pain. Pain brings me joy for some reason. I'm not talented, I'm only skilled. I have nothing special to keep me going and I'm a financial burden on my already struggling mother. Sometimes I just think of killing myself but then I think about why my mom would think. All of her friends either forget about her, abandon her, or die.
I can't talk to my mom about anything, because she's not reliable with emotions. What I can rely on her to do is feed my want for my life to end quickly.

I view Operating Cash Flow (OCF) as the bloodline of any entertainment media business.
Warner Brother's Discovery (WBD) manages to pull in some $7+ Billion annual OCF. With a current market value of $20 Billion, WBD sells on the market 3 times its annual OCF. That's pretty fucking cheap.
The question is why so "cheap"?
Well, maybe it's because of WBD's:

• Crippling $40+ Billion in debt
• Relatively "high" interest rates
• 10% top-line decline in the linear segment
• Anti-trust political climate

However, I think the market has overstated these concerns. With my super inexperienced opinion I think: - WBD's $7+ Billion in OCF is sustainable - Interest rates will stay at a reasonable level (a.k.a no Paul Volcker) - The cable ecosystem won't implode before substaintial debt repayment - The cable ecosystem won't implode before direct-to-consumer becomes a material replacement
The key insight I have over other investors is:
WBD is a business that is saddled, but not funded, by debt, nor primarily funded by equity (cough cough AMC and GME cough).
Sadly, currently I can't say the same about PARA: - Most PARA debt reduction is net of asset sales - If Shari Redstone succeeds in the Skydance merger, then essentially PARA is being funded by new equity to pay down debt.
Of course, for PARA, this won't matter if the turnaround succeeds. However, the current status quote isn't the prettiest -- as the case with most turnarounds (otherwise you wouldn't call it a "turnaround").
For most people, the investment thesis on PARA is more of a sum of the parts (SoTP). If Shari does the "right thing" and get's EVERYBODY a nice payday, then our SoTP will have come to fruition.
So why this post?
Should we cash out, my next "deep value" investment will be WBD. You should be aware though of some risk factors: - Interest rates rocket higher - WBD loses the NBA rights - Top-line decreases in the cable ecosystem is fine, but if the bottom-line is materially affected by cord-cutting then economies scale is lost and the cable-ecosystem is fundamentally broken.
You might wonder, why not Disney? Valuation. Why not AMC? I'm not an APE. Why not Netflix? Valuation.
Of course though, I always keep half my "fuck you" money in the index. Stock picking is just a hobby...
Edit: Also, WBD is Seth Klarman approved who intern is Warren Buffet approved.
Edit: Moreover, Michael Burry has been in and out of the stock more than once.

A few obvious facts:

1. Whenever Trump has been asked to quote the Bible, he refuses. He claims "It is personal". That is %100 grade A bullshit. Have you EVER encountered a Christian that didn't quote the Bible before him doing that? I grew up in Southern Baptist - Jerry Falwell - Old Time Gospel Hour - the Moral Majority. You know who I'm talking about. I NEVER seen it. Ever. To this day I've never seen it before Trump.
2. I bet if you offered $5000 in cash to give to his campaign and all he had to do was quote the Bible, say 5 verses, he would refuse. Reason - he NEVER reads it.
3. Have you EVER seen a picture of him praying by himself? It doesn't exist.
4. A full blown narcissist can't be a Christian. To do so means saying God is better than him. His ego won't let him do that. He sees religion as simply as a tool to control others so he can get what he wants.

If you REALLY wanted to put Donald in a spot - you do this at one of his rallies:
You get near the front and when he is talking, yell out asking him to quote the Bible. Say he is their Christian leader and you want guidance on his favorite Bible verses. When he refuses, (and he will) start saying "Why are you afraid to quote the Bible? You are our spiritual leader! Please quote the Bible! (and other nonsense like that). If you can get the audience to chant saying for him to quote the Bible, that would really do a number on him.
The point here is you are catching him in one of his lies in front of everyone, he can't say no without pissing off his audience. If anything when they will start chant, he is now in a position that he either has to pony up, or they call bullshit.

I’ve noticed this sub in particular has had a very ahistorical and reactionary position on the concept of “patriotism” that I think needs rectified. I’m open to hear everyone’s positions and disagreements on the matter, but I don’t often see the “pro patriotism” position even coherently mentioned so I’d figure I’d give it a shot.
First off, I think it’s important to understand that when socialists say they support “patriotism”, they are talking about proletarian patriotism, which is intrinsically connected to internationalism and is even argue a central component to Marxism Leninism. It is a patriotism that focuses on the betterment of their conditions for its people, for people to come together to help each other, and to promote the idea that everyone should participate and help each other promote and perpetuate these principles. It isn’t nationalism, it isn’t hyper militaristic pro imperialist patriotism, in essence it doesn’t take a class collaborative form. It doesn’t promote the nation above all, nor that class collaboration in the form of developing pro-imperialist positions should be advocated for in order to maintain the nation. It does not uphold some mystical nation as a concept that must be protected.
I think that the idea that America has some uniquely (exceptional) impure history that makes patriotism an unusable tactic to be the same as buying into American Exceptionalism. In fact I think it is an essential tactic that we must utilize, otherwise we give up so much concessions and ground to fascists.(read the Dimitrov quote I give below on the subject.)
I also believe that people often forget that patriotism was utilized by essentially every Marxist Leninist figure throughout all of history. Here are just a few quotes:
“On their own part, the progressive forces in the mass organizations have made considerable appeal to American patriotism and traditions for constructive ends. But this appeal has usually been weak, spasmodic, and ineffective. The workers, farmers, professionals, have not understood how to bring forth in their agitation the basically constructive role they have played historically in building American democracy. ​ In this respect the revolutionary movement has been especially weak. From the foundation of the Socialist Labor Party in the 1870’s, down through the life of the Socialist Party and the IWW, and during the early years of the Communist Party, there was a dominant tendency to ignore and to scorn American tradition and love of country. This arose out of a narrow, sectarian conception of internationalism, and it did much to weaken the position of the revolutionaries in the organizations of the patriotically minded toiling masses. Here again, a better study of Marx and Lenin would have prevented this grievous error. Only during the past few years, notably since the Seventh World Congress of the Communist International and through the writings of Comrade Browder, is real progress being made by our Party in correcting this costly mistake and in basing itself upon a correct Leninist line.
The cultivation of the democratic, revolutionary American traditions among the mass organizations is one of the most important tasks in the building of the democratic front. We must not permit the reactionaries to steal and distort the national traditions and aspirations of the people. The great democratic masses must be taught by constant reference to American history that it was their struggles in the past that built our republic, that the democratic front movement of today is the continuation of all the fights for liberty in the history of our own country; that in the achievement of the current demands of the masses lies the fruition of all that is progressive and glorious in American history; that socialism is the climax toward which the entire historic struggle of the democratic American people inevitably tends.” - William Z Foster.
“Is a sense of national pride alien to us, Great-Russian class-conscious proletarians? Certainly not! We love our language and our country, and we are doing our very utmost to raise her toiling masses (i.e., nine-tenths of her population) to the level of a democratic and socialist consciousness. To us it is most painful to see and feel the outrages, the oppression and the humiliation our fair country suffers at the hands of the tsar’s butchers, the nobles and the capitalists. We take pride in the resistance to these outrages put up from our midst, from the Great Russians; in that midst having produced Radishchev,[3] the Decembrists[4] and the revolutionary commoners of the seventies[5]; in the Great-Russian working class having created, in 1905, a mighty revolutionary party of the masses; and in the Great-Russian peasantry having begun to turn towards democracy and set about overthrowing the clergy and the landed proprietors.
We remember that Chernyshevsky, the Great-Russian democrat, who dedicated his life to the cause of revolution, said half a century ago: “A wretched nation, a nation of slaves, from top to bottom—all slaves."[6] The overt and covert Great-Russian slaves (slaves with regard to the tsarist monarchy) do not like to recall these words. Yet, in our opinion, these were words of genuine love for our country, a love distressed by the absence of a revolutionary spirit in the masses of the Great-Russian people. There was none of that spirit at the time. There is little of it now, but it already exists. We are full of national pride because the Great-Russian nation, too, has created a revolutionary class, because it, too, has proved capable of providing mankind with great models of the struggle for freedom and socialism, and not only with great pogroms, rows of gallows, dungeons, great famines and great servility to priests, tsars, landowners and capitalists.
We are full of a sense of national pride, and for that very reason we particularly hate our slavish past (when the landed nobility led the peasants into war to stifle the freedom of Hungary, Poland, Persia and China), and our slavish present, when these selfsame landed proprietors, aided by the capitalists, are loading us into a war in order to throttle Poland and the Ukraine, crush the democratic movement in Persia and China, and strengthen the gang of Romanovs, Bobrinskys and Purishkeviches, who are a disgrace to our Great-Russian national dignity. Nobody is to be blamed for being born a slave; but a slave who not only eschews a striving for freedom but justifies and eulogises his slavery (e.g., calls the throttling of Poland and the Ukraine, etc., a “defence of the fatherland” of the Great Russians)—such a slave is a lickspittle and a boor, who arouses a legitimate feeling of indignation, contempt, and loathing.
No nation can be free if it oppresses other nations,” said Marx and Engels, the greatest representatives of consistent nineteenth century democracy, who became the teachers of the revolutionary proletariat. And, full of a sense of national pride, we Great-Russian workers want, come what may, a free and independent, a democratic, republican and proud Great Russia, one that will base its relations with its neighbours on the human principle of equality, and not on the feudalist principle of privilege, which is so degrading to a great nation. Just because we want that, we say: it is impossible, in the twentieth century and in Europe (even in the far east of Europe), to “defend the fatherland” otherwise than by using every revolutionary means to combat the monarchy, the landowners and the capitalists of one’s own fatherland, i.e., the worst enemies of our country.” - Lenin
“Can a Communist who is also an internationalist at the same time be a patriot? We hold not only that he can, but that he must.” - Mao
“Communists are the most patriotic Americans I have ever met, and you all are the non-patriots.” ( towards the HUAC) - Paul Robeson.
“Under no circumstances must we underrate fascism's power of ideological infection. On the contrary, we for our part must develop an extensive ideological struggle based on clear, popular arguments and a correct, well thought out approach to the peculiarities of the national psychology of the masses of the people. The fascists are rummaging through the entire history of every nation so as to be able to pose as the heirs and continuators of all that was exalted and heroic in its past, while all that was degrading or offensive to the national sentiments of the people they make use of as weapons against the enemies of fascism. Hundreds of books are being published in Germany with only one aim -- to falsify the history of the German people and give it a fascist complexion. The new-baked National Socialist historians try to depict the history of Germany as if for the past two thousand years, by virtue of some historical law, a certain line of development had run through it like a red thread, leading to the appearance on the historical scene of a national 'savior', a 'Messiah' of the German people, a certain 'Corporal' of Austrian extraction. In these books the greatest figures of the German people of the past are represented as having been fascists, while the great peasant movements are set down as the direct precursors of the fascist movement. Mussolini does his utmost to make capital for himself out of the heroic figure of Garibaldi. The French fascists bring to the fore as their heroine Joan of Arc. The American fascists appeal to the traditions of the American War of Independence, the traditions of Washington and Lincoln. The Bulgarian fascists make use of the national-liberation movement of the seventies and its heroes beloved by the people, Vassil Levsky, Stephan Karaj and others. Communists who suppose that all this has nothing to do with the cause of the working class, who do nothing to enlighten the masses on the past of their people in a historically correct fashion, in a genuinely Marxist-Leninist spirit, who do nothing to link up the present struggle with the people's revolutionary traditions and past -- voluntarily hand over to the fascist falsifiers all that is valuable in the historical past of the nation, so that the fascists may fool the masses.” - Dimitrov.
"Marxism-Leninism is ultimately deeply internationalist, and at the same time, deeply patriotic." -Fidel Castro
"Patriotism is not an empty concept. Education in patriotism cannot be conducted simply by erecting the slogan, 'Let us arm ourselves with the spirit of socialist patriotism! educating people in the spirit of patriotism must begin with fostering the idea of caring for every tree planted on the roadside, for the chairs and the desks in the school.
You have to begin with what is within the grasp of the younger generation, things that relate to their lives, and then gradually move on to educating them to defend consciously the interests of the country and the people. There is no doubt that a person who has formed the habit of cherishing common property from childhood on will grow up to be a valuable patriot."- Kim Il-sung
"From the commencement of the titanic American strife, the workingmen of Europe felt instinctively that the star-spangled banner carried the destiny of their class. The contest for the territories which opened the dire epopee, was it not to decide whether the virgin soil of immense tracts should be wedded to the labor of the emigrant or prostituted by the tramp of the slave driver?" -Karl Marx
"The history of modern, civilized America opened with one of those great, really liberating, really revolutionary wars of which there have been so few compared to the vast number of wars of conquest which, like the present imperialist war, were caused by squabbles among kings, landowners or capitalists over the division of usurped lands or ill-gotten gains.
That was the war the American people waged against the British robbers who oppressed America and held her in colonial slavery, in the same way as these "civilized" bloodsuckers are still oppressing and holding in colonial slavery hundreds of millions of people in India, Egypt, and all parts of the world." -Vladimir Lenin
"We will reach the goal of freedom in Birmingham and all over the nation because the goal of America is freedom. Abused and scorned though we may be, our destiny is tied up with the destiny of America. Before the Pilgrims landed at Plymouth, we were here. Before the pen of Jefferson scratched across the pages of history the majestic word of the Declaration of Independence, we were here." -Martin Luther King Jr
“Us on the Left are second to no one in our patriotism.” - Michael Parenti

I don’t know what to feel anymore I was “diagnosed?” Autistic 4 months ago and was told 2 days ago because my parents didn’t want to overwelm me ( welp I was and probably would be ether way) I still feel like my issues are not legit and the reason I say it in quotes is because I am getting like actual help and stuff and being treated as such from family and teachers but my issues are not “disabling enough “ in a way but my brother is like “dude you got issues you’ve been dealing with this shit forever and it is valid” like because I “””don’t have an issue with tags on clothes””” ( well kinda it’s weird) and I sometimes don’t outwardly express when I’m upset and I use my “””interests””” and video games to help that I’m just making myself look like this and stuff I just feel like I’m invalidating my friends and everyone here with my complaints and stuff like the doctors were like “ oh but they are good at socialising and know when people are upset “ and I just feel like I’m faking everything and this makes me want to hide from the world more I swear I wish there was a simulation thing where I could just live there forever and not have to deal with humans and stuff like socialising is weird but I “”script”” it and talk about my likes a shit tin if it’s family and stuff and I just don’t want to be around anyone out there but I don’t know if I’m saying that to seem cool or edgy but people are just fucking weird and I don’t know how to explain and than I would get “”jealous “” at autistic people and I just don’t fit in anywhere I’m so fucking scared to talk to my therapist because he could be like “well your issues are not that bad “ or something and what if I cry in front of him?! Or hid in the bathroom like one time and wast money or feel completely disconnected from him and shit? I’m terrified

For context this all started 9 years ago I have had a lot of time to reflect on this and I guess I just want to share my story.
Back in 2014 during my (18 m) freshman year of college I met a girl (18 f) I'll call her A. She was fun and cool with lots of common interests. We were in the same clubs and I developed a crush on her. She had some emotional issues which made her drop out of school but she came back in the spring semester. Looking back on it I did a bit of "white knighting" for her to try to be there for her in order to have her like me. Eventually that summer we ended up fake dating because she wanted her parents to stop asking her if she was going to date anyone. Later that summer we made it official and actually dated. I visited her once during the summer and she visited me during the following fall semester because she decided that she wasn't going back to college, but I slowly started to feel more and more distant from her.
During my sophomore year I met another girl (19) (I'll call her B) and we started to get along. I was feeling lonely so I would invite her to watch a few shows in my dorm common room. I knew she had a boyfriend but I kinda got the feeling she didn't care about him much. At first I was trying to encourage my friends to date her, because they were single. She started to develop feelings for me and I developed feelings for her and we ended up hooking up. I felt terrible about it and the line from Hamilton "I wish I could say that was the last time, I said that last time, it became a pastime." Kept ringing in my head.
In the end A broke up with me. I assume that a friend of hers from the college told her what was happening. She never confronted me about it, she simply said we were better as friends abd ended it there. I felt like crap and wanted to end it there with B. B ended up using guilt to encourage me to date her properly after her boyfriend broke up with her.
We dated through out college, at first people were excited because they thought we were a cute couple. Then for a while my friends started asking me if I was happy in my relationship with B. I would tell then yes because I was young and stupid.
Skip to 2020 during the pandemic we were fresh out of college and living together. We would still have my 2 best friends over but didn't really talk to anyone else or go out much due to covid. She never liked me leaving the house or doing anything because of covid. She ended up making me miss my grandfather's birthday. Which should have been a sign, but I kept trying to rationalize it as her being worried about covid. My friends were still asking me if I was happy and it kept getting harder to say yes. I watched philosophytube's video "Men.Abuse.Trauma" and started tearing up and I couldn't understand why. I kept rationalizing it as "She isn't as bad as thier ex."
In December she broke up with me. I felt devastated because I kept trying to sacrifice more and more for her. I kept hoping and praying that there was something that I could do to make myself the perfect boyfriend agian.
4 years later I am only left with the quote from Romeo and Juliet "These violent delights have violent ends And in their triumph die, like fire and powder, Which as they kiss consume. The sweetest honey Is loathsome in his own deliciousness And in the taste confounds the appetite. Therefore love moderately; long love doth so; Too swift arrives as tardy as too slow."

So basically I’ve been bartending a year and a half and got poached into a new cocktail bartending restraunt. My friend who I knew was struggling with money with his previous job (another job I got him by reccomending him) was looking for a new job so I got him a position that leads directly up to assistant manager. I didn’t have to do that I did it to be kind and now am beginning to regret it. It’s a half an hour commute and we’re a week in I’ve been driving us there and back every day as the plan, sometimes after 13 hour shifts at 2am. I don’t ask him for a penny petrol money. We signed ourselves up for some pretty nasty shifts 10am - 2pm and 5pm - 2am fro thurs Friday sat. So we’ve been sleeping at max 5 hours a night so tension is very high. I actually want to kill him. He is a better cocktail bartender than me, I know this he took a mixology course. But he doesn’t even clean up after himself I have been left running up and down cleaning mine and his shakers. He collects glasses when asked but never puts them in the glass wash he just leaves me to do it while he makes 70% of the cocktails. When I do try to do something he massively micromanaged me points out every mistake I make infront of our new manager. He makes up his own cocktails and makes them look the same he doesn’t follow the specs but it looks like he’s instantly learnt them off by heart? While im reading off the fucking laminated sheet looking slow af. Today my manager told a customer who was asking for a job he was in trouble for having too many staff to say no, I didn’t hear the girls question so I went over to my friend saying I was worried they’re cutting staff. He said to me that he’d back out because it was my job first. Then when my co worker came and we talked to her ab it and she explained the whole story he said and infront of everyone and I quote “well they would’ve got red of you anyway because I’m way better at the job” like what the actual fuck . I spoke to him about the not washing his stuff and he said it was a bad habit and not on purpose and claimed he had done glass washes (he hadn’t) As we set off in my car from the job I got him I asked if he wanted to connect his phone to my speaker he said no I went to connect mind he snapped that he didn’t want to listen to anything he just wanted silence I said well I’m driving and i want to listen to music but it’s cheaper than a taxi he snapped “I can get a taxi if you want “. I love the job other than working with him, we’ve never fallen out before this but I am finding it intollerable

People have been saying it is a pain when a creator takes a LoRA off Civitai and you lose track of details on how to use it well, like the trigger words (if any).
The trigger words or tags are stored inside the LoRA and can be extracted with a number of tools. Here's a Python program I wrote to output the tags and their frequency in raw json. Redirect it to a file or let it output to the screen and you can just read them.
Tested on a few lora then found it didn't work on all of them. Oh well.

PS D:\loras> py gettriggers.py --input 'oil painting.safetensors' --triggers
[!] There was a problem opening the file 'oil painting.safetensors'. Are you sure it exists?
May sure you use the proper file extension.
PS D:\loras> py gettriggers.py --input Woman_life_actions.safetensors --triggers
{"img": {"she puts on lipstick": 37, "in front of a mirror": 37, "wiping her mouth": 13, "putting on tights": 23, "writings": 5, "licking her lips": 10, "extreme closeup": 7, "closeup": 3, "adjusting hair": 28, "adjusting lock of hair": 14, "biting lips": 10}}
PS D:\loras> py gettriggers.py --input 'Real_Mirror_Selfie.safetensors' --triggers
{"img": {"mirror selfie": 163, "1girl": 161, "holding smartphone": 80, "underwear": 75, "panties": 72, "topless": 48, "navel": 86, "long hair": 97, "brown hair": 38, "indoors": 67, "covering breasts": 7, "breasts": 126, "sitting": 20, "bathroom": 46, "nipples": 94, "necklace": 7, "jewelry": 34, "sink": 21, "counter": 1, "holding cellphone": 55, "underwear only": 28, "medium breasts": 52, "black panties": 13, "slightly obscured face": 24, "perfect girl": 8, "mirroredge": 85, "blonde hair": 39, "tattoo": 11, "clothes lift": 12, "spread legs": 4, "pussy": 13, "panties removed": 1, "fully obscured face": 13, "ass": 25, "barefoot": 19, "bed": 6...

https://pastebin.com/Ec1Psf9V

Brothers, sisters, visitors especially, Thank you all for opening this. It’s my prayer that you will read through all of this and remember who we are in Christ, especially in these days.
I was online the other day, and was just glancing over a thread and noticed out of no where, people were arguing about the topic of God. Just, general topic, you know how things go online.
There was one person who said, “love is the answer. It’s why Jesus came and to die for us. It’s all about loving one another.” To which I thought, ah yes that’s the greatest commandment of all. But she really didn’t say anything else of value. Yes, love, the greatest fruit of the spirit, the great commandment is love one another, the best part of living with others may be to show their love to each other. But she kind of hid behind saying that and nothing else.
Another was quoting verbatim the KJV versions of some of our greatest verses, and nothing else. Just kind of saying the words, no connection. It brought me back to Paul who reminds us to be tasteful in our interactions with nonbelievers so that we might be heard in a genuine way, and possibly plant the seeds of salvation.
Another, nonbeliever, was throwing out his concerns on why or why not they weren’t participating in the conversation of faith at all.
.
I want to talk about the fundamentals of our belief. As followers of Jesus, children of God, vessels of the Holy Spirit, there should be the understanding of why we believe without the answer having anything to do with tradition, or culture. We should have a basic understanding as to why the gospel is truth. We cannot be the foundation who was tossed away because of the wind. Spiritually, our wisdom must be current, and in tune with the Holy Spirit, and the fundamentals. Otherwise, we choose our own wisdom over the truth and what? God gives us to our own wisdoms leading us to foolishness? A basic understanding and capability to answer basic questions of our faith is just as important if not more than our works. Faith without works is dead, but an eager tongue with no wisdom will lead to failure and destruction.
If you’re still reading this with open ears and open eyes, I thank you. I am only the vessel of this truth and have been given the discernment to decipher it, and the ability to write it.
1) ((This is the one relevant to Gods might, wonder, creativity)): God created all things, with His word. The first 5 days of creation He finished and he said “it was good”, (Genesis 1). In the beginning of all of it, was His word, and everything that is was created by Him and nothing was created without Him, (John 1). God, with his spirit, created all.
2) ((This one is relevant to humankind being favored and loved by God)): God created man on the 6th day and he calls it “very good”. The only time in this story of creation where something is very good, not just good. Sees man is alone and says that is not good. Puts him in a deep sleep, takes his side (‘selah,’ also used in the Hebrew to describe the “side of the mountain, the “side of the ark of the covenant) and makes woman, as an ally in this life.
3) ((This one is relevant to Jesus’ role)): Adam and Eve lived in Eden, and God walked amongst them. Man was meant to be with God, and worship Him and love Him. God had created us for that andd the way we were able to was by the garden. Eden was our bridge between God and earth where we were mean to live freely, perfectly and with God. The bridge to God was broken, from the fall, through disobedience and from the moment of the fall God foretells of another way back to Him.
We all know the line. “I will send the seed of a woman to crush the head of the serpent…”— which on its own one might ask why? The answer is because this is the moment death enters. From the fall and on, we were no longer bridged to spiritual life or God at all. We were trapped on this side of existence away from spiritual life, God, Eden. So it HAD to be the seed of the woman. It had to be in our realm of reality, we were no longer on that side of reality.
Next, “the serpent will wound the heel”, representing that the man will suffer. It will be a wound.
It’s a rule of creation, all life needs blood to live. And since we have forfeited our spiritual life in Eden where we’re meant to be, to have physical life, we have no blood to live and we are dead spiritually without believing in the fact that the blood of Christ replaces ours. Think back to the creation story: “God breathed life into adam…” it was the ‘ruach’, or the spirit, that livened adam whom was formed from the ‘adama’, or the ground, and had his ‘dam’, or blood, to keep him alive. God, who is one with His Word, is the giver of life, and is the Truth.
Foreshadowed by Moses, unbeknownst to him, recorded in Numbers concerning the bronze snake, & the rock and the water (both times, first the strike representing the crucifixion and second representing the spoken confirmation—where Moses failed btw).
And so Jesus comes to fulfill that prophetic word from God. A) come to our plane of reality because we fell off His B) crush the head of Satan/serpent—destroying the power of death, and the power of the fall. C) dying—it is the blood that gives life, without blood we cannot live. D) giving us the Holy Spirit—when God gave Adam blood to live, He also gave him His ‘ruach’ to breathe. And so it is the exact same thing as now, with clean blood from Jesus to live AND the Spirit, or ‘ruach’, to breathe.
Jesus says “I AM the way” for this reason. He is the bridge from humanity to God, just like Eden.
Amen, I thank you father for your holy wisdom and I pray that someone who you needed to understand the details closely finally sees. I pray your will be done in all things. Amen.

I don't really like venting or talking about my problems but I have to ask, do you ever find yourself becoming more and more intolerant whenever you read things online? Cuz goddamn, I say some nasty shit when I scroll. Starting to think it's affecting me even though I maintain that "the Internet isn't real life".
If it's not black people getting shit on, it's men and if it isn't men, it's black people. Even though I'm a tad bit more secure in my race and gender and whatnot, I still find myself throwing my hands up and looking into an invisible camera with a puzzled face. To quote Jay-Z: "Ahhh, What did I do?"
Shit's kinda tiring and although it doesn't hurt now (it just pisses me off a lil), it hurt to know that I'm essentially a horrible monster in the eyes of society. Like I said, the net is not real life but I find myself just a little more cautious of how I am in public and around women. Like even if we're standing in line, I just hope that I don't look like a creep. Hell, the race discussion had me stewing on things that weren't worth my time.
Anyways, I know that I have a long way to go but I still find myself questioning it all and saying some horrid things to myself.
Thanks for listening.

The View from Oregon – 289
Re: Scientia sub specie illuminatatis
Friday 17 May 2024
Dear Friends,
In the past several newsletters I have discussed the lack of a science of science, and some of the ramifications of this absence. Another consequence of the absence of a science of science is the selective way in which science develops, and this in turn leads to Danilevsky’s philosophy of science, which acknowledges that science can be different in different social milieux. In other words, science is relative to the scientific community that practices science. Kuhn comes to an analogous conclusion, though for Kuhn it is the diachronic relativity of science that emerges from a history of scientific revolutions triggered by model crises and paradigm shifts. Kuhn’s work continues to be debated, are there are significant differences of interpretation that keep alive the controversy as to whether paradigm shifts are rational or irrational. (Why not both by turns?)
Danilevsky presents us with the prospect of the synchronic relativity of science, in which paradigms differ not down through historical time, but across ethnic communities. This strikes at the heart of Enlightenment universalism, but, as I have tried to argue in these newsletters, Enlightenment ideology is not intrinsically scientific, but for a time Enlightenment thinkers made common cause with the sciences as a way both to advance their interests and to fight the common enemy of traditionalism. But scientists themselves have so completely internalized Enlightenment ideology that, even if the Enlightenment can abandon science, scientists cannot abandon the Enlightenment. That science is the same, that it must be the same, for all who practice it, seems to be an unspoken presupposition of science practised sub specie illuminatatis.
I don’t know of any analytical philosophers who have taken up Danilevsky’s argument, even if only to refute it. Nor do I know of any analogous arguments, though my knowledge of contemporary philosophy of science is far from exhaustive. The closest we come to Danilevsky in the mainstream of Anglo-American analytical philosophy of science is the debate over Kuhn’s philosophy of science, which evades some of the most troubling aspects of Danilevsky’s account. But in the absence of a science of science, we cannot definitively exclude Danilevsky’s account, just as we cannot exclude the role of personalities in the development of science (the focus of last week’s newsletter), nor can we exclude the possibility of alternative sciences that explain as much of the world as our familiar sciences, but which are largely disjoint from the familiar sciences. This latter possibility is related as an anecdote in Eugene Wigner’s “The Unreasonable Effectiveness of Mathematics in the Natural Sciences,” which I have quoted many times (though, strangely, apparently not in these newsletters, as I searched back several years just now and didn’t find this quoted, though I could have sworn that I have referenced this so many times my readers may be tired to hearing of it).
Another problem potentially soluble by a science of science: every special science undergoes its own crisis in its turn as it is forced to recognize that it cannot define either the object of its research or the fundamental theoretical terms it employs. There was the crisis in the foundations of mathematics, the crisis in physics, the crisis in psychology, the replication crisis (which falls hardest on social psychology, but which leaves few disciplines unscathed), the crisis in cosmology, and no doubt further crises yet to come. Some of these crises resemble each other, suggesting analogous structural problems within the sciences, while other crises seem to be highly specific to a particular subject matter (as with the crisis in cosmology generated by diverging measures of the Hubble constant). Further research into crises may reveal a deeper commonality, or may reveal each crisis to uniquely supervene on the objects of knowledge distinctive to each science.
The above assumes that a science of science would foreclose upon these troubling scenarios we would prefer not to contemplate. I think we can safely say that we have excluded some unwelcome scenarios for science, and this implies some rudimentary foundations of a science of science, and I think that if the project of a science of science ever came about, i.e., if it ever became a scientific research program on its own—or perhaps a meta-scientific research program—it would gradually foreclose upon the paradoxes of science, excluding them one by one, first taking care of the relatively simple problems, and then moving on to the more difficult ones. We don’t yet even know what the hardest problems are, or what they will be, when we earnestly turn toward formulating a science of science. It is all terra incognita to us.
In the absence of a science of science, however, we do have something to go on, and that is the record of the most successful special sciences, which, through their utility and fruitfulness, have provided a model for the other sciences to follow. And follow they do. A successful scientific discipline spurs imitation in the other special sciences, with the methods and the research program and theoretical structures copied. Science, then, has recourse to analogy. Later sciences are constructed along the lines of earlier successful sciences, and with good reason. The successful sciences have resolved many or most of their problems, and their methods have proved to be a successful way to derive knowledge from the empirical world.
But analogy itself is a theoretical problem. It has no standing as a formal principle of reasoning, and empirically it forces us into the kind of metaphysical speculation that most scientists hate—reflections on the uniformity of nature and such like. If nature is uniform, then a scientific methodology for the investigation of nature can be uniform, and we can know that it is (or will be) as effective in one region of experience as in another region of experience. Proof of this, however, is a metaphysical proof, and not anything scientific in the usual sense.
I should not belabor this idea of the absence of a science of science without acknowledging that it was, of course, the traditional idea that philosophy was the science of science, or, more narrowly, philosophical logic as it was elaborated prior to the mathematization of logic, that was understood to be the science of science, or, as it was also commonly known, the theory of science. Many logical works were called the theory of science, as, for example, Bernard Bolzano’s four volume Theory of Science—Wissenschaftslehre—which was completed in 1837, but the first complete English translation of which did not appear until 2014. In the meantime, between 1837 and 2014, logic, philosophy, and science all underwent rapid growth, and even, we could say, directional growth, that took them in a developmental direction of elaboration that was not anticipated prior to this time.
We can imagine a counterfactual history of logic (and of science) in which logic developed linearly, and did not experience a sudden growth along with a sudden realignment, gradually converging upon the ideal of a theory of science imagined by logicians like Bolzano. While mathematical logic transformed both logic and mathematics both, what was lost in the elaboration of mathematical logic was its connection to this traditional function of logic as the science of science. Moreover, the internal integration of logic was lost, though, it must be observed, other forms of integration appeared as logic was reconstructed analogously to mathematics.
Lately I have been thinking how, with the advent of mathematical logic and analytical philosophy, theory of meaning and theory of reference bifurcated, and with this bifurcation the inverse relationship between the two, explicitly recognized in traditional logic, was lost. Traditional logic asserts that as intension expands, extension narrows, and as extension expands, intension narrows. Intuitively it is easy to see that this is the case: a highly definite meaning applies only to a very few referents, while a generic meaning applies to a great many more referents. But with the development of mathematical logic and analytical philosophy, the theory of meaning and the theory of reference developed in different directions.
What happened? The whole of Western civilization was redirected and realigned by the industrial revolution. Some years ago I wrote about how the industrial revolution essentially hijacked other developments that were already taking place, and which therefore did not have the opportunity to come to a natural fruition because industrial change was so rapid and so catastrophic. I called this the preemption hypothesis (and gave it a further application in Late-Adopter Spacefaring Civilization: The Preemption that Didn’t Happen). We can understand preemption as a more generic historical process in which one historical process that is aggressively expansive overtakes another historical process that is slower and more gradual. An invasive weedy species of cognition expands universally and crowds out endemic species of cognition, driving them to extinction, and leaving us with a philosophical monoculture and its attendant disadvantages.
The kind of industrial civilization we might have gotten had the industrial revolution been an industrial evolution instead of a revolution, unfolding over millennia, as it is likely that the development of agriculture developed, would have been dramatically different. And the industrial revolution spawned revolutions in every adjacent sphere of life and thought. The preemption that was the industrial revolution can also be seen at work in intellectual history, and even in aesthetic and spiritual history. Science and philosophy began to transform early, more or less defining by themselves the advent of modernity when science and philosophy were modern but economics and industry were not. However, with the industrial revolution, science and philosophy were given a new and more violent spur to further growth and realignment.
These redirections and realignments of science, philosophy, and logic are vivid illustrations of the kind of selective development of science that Danilevsky imagined, though he thought of these selective developments in terms of their being embedded in cultural-historical traditions. Western science was embedded in the Western cultural-historical tradition (though Danilevsky called this the Romano-Germanic cultural-historical type), and when this tradition changed due to the industrial revolution, the science (and philosophy and logic) changed along with the tradition. Had the change been given an impetus in a different direction, or had the change not happened at all, science and its adjacent intellectual activities would look rather different today. I will not deny that change would have been much slower, but qualitatively different change might have had unprecedented impacts on history. Obviously, in the present context, what I am thinking of is a tradition like the logic of Bolzano being developed gradually, perhaps over hundreds of years, until it becomes the genuine science of science the want of which we feel at present.
It is ironically reflexive that we cannot exclude the possibility of a counterfactual science, based on a counterfactual logical tradition that grew into a mature theory of science, precisely because we lack this same theory of science. We also cannot prove that our rapid progress in science since the industrial revolution might stagnate for want of a proper theory of science, and due to the cognitive monoculture favored by rapid progress, nor that a counterfactual science, based on a counterfactual logic, might ultimately overtake and outstrip the rapid progress of science after an industrial revolution. It may be the case that, when a civilization experiences a rapid and violent industrial revolution, the accelerated rate of change cripples the other institutions of that civilization, and inevitably leads to both industrial and scientific progress eventually grinding to a halt, because the rate of progress was unsustainable. We could call the two implied scenarios of scientific and industrial development the tortoise scenario and the hare scenario, where slow and steady wins the race.
Best wishes,
Nick
PS—Last Wednesday I hiked up Dog Mountain again (previously in a PS to newsletter 239 I mentioned hiking Dog Mountain on 31 May 2023, almost exactly a year ago). This time I didn’t go all the way to the top, but I went as far as the Dog Mountain Lookout, which is a viewpoint over the Columbia Gorge just short of the top. Spring is one of the best times to do the Dog Mountain walk because of all the wildflowers.
PPS— The new number of Isonomia Quarterly, Volume 2 Issue 2, is now available, which includes a new essay by me, “The Coming Coeval Age” (a PDF version is also available). I plan to also record a video about this for my Today in Philosophy of History series. As with my recent big history paper, “A Complexity Ladder for Big History,” this essay for the Isonomia Quarterly isn’t specifically about philosophy of history, but it does have some interesting implications for history that I will explore and elaborate.
PPPS—I have finished listening to the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius. This is a classic I have skimmed many times but have not previously read through word-for-word. It always feels good to have the experience of the whole of a classic to better understand the references generated by said classic. Often we think of stoics as being distant and even possessed of an inhuman degree of self-control, but I was surprised by the repeated references to sociability in the Meditations. There is a pervasive sense in Marcus Aurelius of going along to get along.
Immediately upon finishing the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius I started listening to How to Think Like a Roman Emperor: The Stoic Philosophy of Marcus Aurelius by Donald J. Robertson. This is not exactly a commentary on the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius, but a kind of exposition, both filling in the backstory to the life of Marcus Aurelius, as well as the life of the author, and showing the relevance of Stoic philosophy in the present. This book is about twice as long as the Meditations themselves.

Newsletter link:

https://mailchi.mp/9c0106fe7105/the-view-from-oregon-289
​

The moment a lot of you have been waiting for is here!
A couple of notes before you read (or after because I would just jump into the list right away too)

1. Direct quotes from Ali herself are in italics.
2. I tried my best to keep everything in timeline order. Some people like The Come Back Kid I placed in the order where they reconnected/talked about on the pod. But I did my best to note this.
3. All this information came from the FMH podcast, the Patreon, the original FMH blog, TikTok and other podcast that feature FMH/Ali. I also crossed reference information with this sub. I got most of this done with the help of the Patreon and listening to 1.75x speed but I lost accessed to the Patreon because my subscription ended.
4. I'm open to edits! Things around the matchmaker era confused me and if anything is incorrect or if I'm missing someone, please let me know! I will note where corrections are made.
5. Some people don't have anything simply because only a name was said or I couldn't find any details about the person/date
6. And of course, please be respectful of all the sub rules!

Names on the original FMH blog

• Mr. Adorable aka The Coach
• Trouble
• Waffles
• Future Husband Brian (FHB)
• Cookie
• Peter Pan
• Ambiguous Goodbye Guy
• Bad Bitch Man

AOL chatroom Boyfriend
Mentioned on Tiktok and on the pod once
Myspace Boyfriend
Mentioned on Tiktok
Third Boyfriend
Met on eCrush.com in 2002 and this was mentioned on the Cracked Up podcast, The Dave Glaser Podcast and Tiktok
The Kiwi
Met on a 2 week Model UN type youth trip in high school when Ali was 15, never a boyfriend but she had a huge crush on him, he tried to kiss Ali and she literally ran away, didn’t talk the rest of the trip but exchanged numbers and screen names (Ali’s was FineGal13 or BeachJewel760), she made him a mixtape cd called “Ali’s really cool mix for The Kiwi” but never sent it and she still has it. In 2021, he DM’d her when she posted photos of her and her mom in France and invites her to visit him in London, she says she can’t but says they should catch up if he comes to NYC
Fourth Boyfriend
Met on OkCupid when you had to use it on the computer, this was mentioned on Tiktok
The Homecoming Date or Light Switch
First boyfriend? (she goes back and forth calling him her first bf or a situationship), a family friend, a month younger than Ali, dated in high school but went to different high schools, football player, made him ask her to her Homecoming dance over email (her words), Ali hid in the bathroom the whole Homecoming dance, 3-4 revisits of this situations as adults, saw him on Bumble a few years ago and texted him that he had a typo in his bio, “he very much wanted to be with me” and now he’s married with a kid. His mom is still “obsessed” with Ali and she listens to FMH
Random college guy
Freshman year of college, Ali doesn’t have a nickname for him/doesn’t remember his real name, met this guy through a friend, was texting him to invite him over to hot tub but her phone autocorrected to “how about some hot rubbing tonight?” but Ali didn’t noticed/didn’t correct it and he never replied, Ali had a house party and got really drunk and was all over him, he left the party early, she messaged him on MySpace 3-4 times asking why he left
The Resident
Matched on Match.com, first guy she dated in NYC after college, older than Ali, a doctor, lasted 3 months ”maybe”, he didn’t like Ali’s friends, got a card from him on her birthday and it said “Love, The Resident” and it took Ali back a little, Ali drinks black coffee because of him, he coordinated having her mom visit NYC for her birthday then he broke up with her a week later
The Ghost
Met at a bar when she was 25, turns out they matched on OkCupid and they already had a date scheduled next week, they dated for 6-8 weeks, had sleepovers, “The worst ghosting experience I’ve ever had”, he borrowed The Great Gatsby from Ali’s roommate, planned to make dinner together after a beach trip in August with her friends and never showed up, Ali is blowing up his phone and gets no reply, two weeks later she finally texts “are you alive? check yes or no” and he responds “Yes”, Ali then ask if he could return the book and gets no reply again, 5 months go by and she receives the book in the mail with the note: “Here’s the book back. Sorry. P.S. sorry about last summer. I was in a bad place. You’re a great person and your salmon is amazing”, since then she has ran into him twice on the streets and matched with him on Bumble
The Coach/Mr. Adorable
First serious boyfriend at 26/27 in 2013, matched on Match.com or met through work depending if you’re listening to the pod or reading her OG blog, clean-cut look, played volleyball, Ali invited him to a friend’s birthday party and they made out in the streets at 4am, on their second date he asked Ali if she was seeing any one and when Ali said no he ask her to be his girlfriend 3 days after their first date, dated for almost 1.5 years or almost 2 years depending on if you’re listening to the pod or the Patreon, first time saying “I love you” to a guy, “lovely guy“, never would posted Ali on his instagram until Ali said something, he “lived” with her for two weeks while he was in between apartments, tried blind folding/hair pulling during sex and she didn’t like it, by the end of their relationship Ali didn’t like sex and thought she wasn’t a very sexual person, after they broke up Ali drunk texted him at 2am and he picked her up and she spent the night and she took her things in the morning in a rolly suitcase, from her blog in 2015: “I just want to be careful I don’t end up with another Mr. Adorable situation, where I find myself dating my platonic best friend”, had drinks with him in 2016 from the blog: “Not in a romantic way (at least on my end)”, Ali still talks to him sometimes through casual instagram DMs, he’s currently (as of 2021) dating someone for 4+ years and Ali thinks they’re going to get engaged
Trouble
OG 2015 FMH blog, never mentioned on the pod, “I was immediately enamored with him”, met at a Beer Olympic party but he worked with one of Ali’s best friends (Ali was still dating The Coach at the time), lived in BK, tattoos and stubble, Ali’s best friend said he was a “fuck boy”, “he very much made me see that it was the right thing for me and The Coach to not be together”, from her blog in 2015: “he has this look in his eye like he’s constantly laughing at me – in a super sexy way”, he texted her saying he didn’t see anything romantically with her and she sent a gif of someone shrugging
Personal side note: Ali has mentioned she has cheated on someone but never disclosed who she cheated on or with. I feel like she cheated on Mr.A/The Coach with Trouble because of the timeline. Just a guess.
Waffles
Matched on Bumble, OG 2015 FMH blog, he asked Ali fuck/marry/kill breakfast foods, dated 2 months around summer time, on Fourth of July while watching fireworks he said how they had a great day and Ali replied with something along the lines with “yeah, it would be better if I could call you my boyfriend”, he said he wanted a relationship but just not with Ali and shortly afterwards they stopped seeing each other
The Buffalo
Lived in Buffalo NY, 6’5, Scorpio, met in 2015 at Adults National volleyball (Ali’s team won that year) where he was heckling her while she was playing, asks Ali’s mom for her number and Ali’s mom said “I guess you’re tall enough” and told him to ask her himself, he flew her out and she met his parents, dated over summer, exclusive but never boyfriend/girlfriend (but called him her LD boyfriend on TikTok), texted and talked on the phone a lot, Ali’s best friend’s favorite ex “they had really good banter”, in October he invited her to his cousins wedding and she invited him to her friends wedding, after Ali bought her ticket to his cousins wedding (with the promise he would buy her ticket to her friend’s wedding) he ghosted and stonewalled her, she “poured her heart out to him on voicemail” and he never replied, she asked him to pay her back for her ticket and he got mad that she “made this about money”, 2 years later he told Ali that he freaked out because he really liked her and saw a future with her but knew she would never move to Buffalo and it would “never work”, Ali said at the time she would have considered moving for him, Ali used to have him blocked on Facebook and told all her friends not to update her on info about him (unless she asked). He’s now married and goes to Disney with his wife (which Ali kind of scoffs at?), Ali said on TikTok that she dodged a bullet
Baby Bic
Met him at Adults National years ago, had a flirtationship with him in 2016 when he was 19 years old, ran into him at the Adults Nationals 2021, last texts she got from him were about getting his fake ID taken away at the bar and him visiting her in NYC but Ali didn’t want to buy him beer and drink at her apartment
The Chef
Matched on Tinder around 2016, he loved karaoke, “total shit”, asked Ali to be his girlfriend and to meet his mom after a month, off and on dating, broke up the first time because he was talking to his ex, lied and flew to Mexico to see his ex while dating Ali, that ex sent Ali a Snapchat of them in bed together on that Mexico trip, Ali broke up with him via text and called him a shitty boyfriend, he’s the reason Ali deleted her Snapchat because of drunk Snaps he would send post break up, FB messaged Ali 6 years later (while Roark was visiting/staying with Ali) and said sorry for being a shit head. Ali’s best friends hated him
The Dentist
Met on Halloween in the wild, Canadian, dated NYE 2016- May 2017 “nice guy, not my guy”, one of Ali’s best friend’s favorite ex “he adored you, “he was too sweet for me” and “he had no edge to him”, he painted Ali’s cat for her 30th birthday but she was annoyed it was just Rory and not both cats, The Chef texted Ali while on a date/sleeping at his house
ASV - Aspiring Sober Vegan
Met through a friend (her best guy friend’s college roommate) the day before she had to fly out to her dad’s memorial, a doctor, into meditation, remembered him “being cuter” when they went on a first date, felt “the spark”, had “omg this is awesome sex”, Ali described this relationship as a “slow burn” and “the most attracted she ever been to a partner” even thought she didn’t think he was that cute in the beginning, dated 2-3 months before he tried to ghost Ali but they talked and broke up, four months later they start casually dating/FWB because he’s moving but this turns into a ‘middle distance relationship’ and he moves to Philly, had a lot of communication issues but didn't have a lot of fights, wants to live in Ohio and give a % of his income to charity, Ali was close to saying ‘I love you’ but didn’t, he uninvited her to meet his extended family and they got in a fight, broke up with her a couple weeks before their 6 month anniversary at the park while on a picnic and told her that she’s still his favorite person, Ali used to think he was “the one that got away” and would frequently have dreams about him. From what Ali knows, he's sober but not vegan
The Scientist
2017 or 2018ish, from San Diego, went on one date, Ali ended up ghosting him due to the decline in her dad’s health, saw him on Hinge while she was in San Diego for 3 months in 2020, texted him and apologized for ghosting him, ended up going on 2-3 more dates, took a selfie in front of his house and sent it to him but acted like she didn’t know that was his house and made a TikTok about it, things ended up not working but she doesn’t make it clear on who ended it. She can now see she shouldn’t have been going on dates during this time when her dad was sick.
Good on Paper Divorced Dude
Met a couple of years ago (she told this story on TikTok in 2020) on Bumble
The Groomsman
Met at her friend Ashley’s wedding in Chicago Oct 2019, had a “two night stand” with him, texted/talked/FT’d for 3-4 months, divorced, never dated seriously/FWB, saw each other a couple time when he came to NYC, Ali stopped talking with him due to FMH and her trying to find a serious relationship, he starts dating someone, follows FMH on insta, slid into her DM in 2022 and then sent her soup while she was sick, turns out he’s single again, 2 months later Ali is heading to Chicago and texts him “Hello! Reminder that my arrival to your neck of the woods is imminent” and turns out he is now seeing someone and Ali doesn’t see him while in Chicago (at least she doesn’t mention it)
Unnicknamed person
He was her plus one at her best friend from college’s NYE wedding 2019/2020, met and hung out with Ali’s mom, posted photos of them together on her personal Insta story, “fully dating but weren’t official hehe” doesn’t have a nickname/never gave him a nickname? This could be The Latvian/the person she texted her friend in DC about saying “I think I’m on a date with my husband”

Starts FMH on January 2020 on Instagram/TikTok

The Traveler
He was browsing Bumble while Ali was in the bathroom during their first date, he was banned from Bumble and was using his grandma phone number. Ali turned down a second date
The Duke
Early FMH, went for long periods of time in between texts, 7-8 Zoom dates while Ali was in San Diego and he was in NY, Ali said you could see three of his ex’s on his instagram page (without scrolling), they finally went on one date and it was “meh” but they did kiss on their date
The Oyster
Matched on Bumble (he had one photo and no bio) two weeks before Valentines Day, Gemini, a lawyer, part of the 13 First Dates in 30 Days series (he was #13), dated Feb 2020-Aug 2020, love bomber, felt “the spark” and became official after 3 dates, best first date ever??? at the time, said “I love you” to Ali after two weeks, “For most of my relationship with The Oyster, he didn’t live in the city he had moved to Connecticut without telling me”, would fight all the time, opposite political views, Ali felt like a “fucking summer camp director” because she planned all their dates and he would get upset if Ali didn't have a plan, sought out a therapist (Megan) because of her relationship struggles because of him, went to Mass/church, he wanted a traditional marriage/life/wife/kids (at one point had Ali thinking she wanted that), didn’t want to live in NYC, didn’t support BLM, Cindy hated him
The Pilot
Went on 3 dates, texted a lot, didn’t hear back from him in four days and when she said she was looking to date someone who showed more consistency, he replied saying he met someone the day after their last date who seems to have more free time than Ali and he wants to pursue that but would like to be friends, Ali said on TikTok that this other women “bent her schedule to his schedule” and she was unwilling to do that. Mostly talked about him on TikTok
The Analyst
Matched on Bumble two years ago and went on one date, re matched in 2021 and he stood Ali up, she send him a text “getting stood up” script and he never replied. Only mentioned him on TikTok (?)

Ali and Roark start FMH: The Podcast February 2021

The Boomerang
First date on the pod? I couldn't find anything else about him
The Scuba Diver
The Music Man
One date, “he didn’t do anything wrong, he’s just not for me”, amped up small talk, complimented Ali a lot which made her feel awkward cause she wasn’t feeling it, he texted her and asked for a second date and Ali sent the no ghosting script
The Bet
Uses the phrase “ok bet”, 28 years old shoe designer, only went on one dinner date to a spot he picked, turns out its cash only and he didn’t bring cash, was not into him , not looking for the same thing
The Dinosaur
Nickname was previously The Hawaiian, first date at Dinosaur BBQ, stood in a parking spot to save for Ali, he asked for a kiss after their date and Ali declined saying maybe next time
The Rose
He sent her a rose on hinge, first date was an hour long walk in the park while drinking beer
The Comic
Matched on Hinge, older than Ali (Ali’s friends express how happy they were to hear that), had brunch on their first date (was the first part of a double header but the second guy canceled), listed as “moderate” politically on Hinge, good and easy convo, went back and forth twice over text and then never heard back from him, “technically not ghosting...”
The Camper
Met in the wild at a volleyball tournament in July, lives in Chicago, 27 years old, hung out the whole time, over heard Ali asking someone to get her a make out partner, gave Ali his number, drunkly ask him for a FT date in the future and he didn’t reply, Ali texts him again about a volleyball thing and he replied back with not a lot of enthusiasm, Ali is going to Chicago in Sept for a volleyball tournament and she’s already planning on playing 4-on-4 with her best friend vs. his roommate and maybe The Camper, he texts her saying he has to work on the date of the tournament and won’t be able to do the 4-on-4 game, “I feel like I got broken up with someone I never want to date in the first place”

Ali’s Matchmaker contract starts in August 2021 - 6 matches

The Schmoozer
Went on a dinner date, was chatting up the waitress in a kind of creepy way, was bragging about a lot of things and it turned Ali off and Ali texted him her no ghosting script
The Accountant
1st matchmaker match, 31 years old, lives in BK, his dad has also passed away, easy to talk to, on the third date she wasn’t sure if she saw a future with him and in her gut doesn’t feel like this would be a slow burn, Ali breaks things off with him, months (?) later he sent Ali a 5 min long voice memo and they said they were both down to see each other as friends. He later on dated and ghosted Erica
The Aussie
Matched on Hinge, in politics, from Australia but lived all over the place, asked Ali what she’s looking for on the first date and he said he’s “casually looking for something serious”, Ali accidentally walks up to a different person on their second date, Ali texts him saying she would love to see him before he leaves on a trip and she wasn’t happy that it took him till the next day to reply and he can’t see her before he leaves
The Goalie
Was supposed to be Ali’s 2nd match, he’s a paying client, Ali didn’t hear back from him for a while when she told him where she lived, he wrote to the matchmaker saying that she lived too far away even though it states where she lives in her matchmaker profile
The Journalist
2nd matchmaker match, ended things because she was dating/pursuing things with The Discoball and paused her matchmakers matches

The Threepeat
Matched multiple times on dating apps but this recent time with Hinge, Amazon seller, first date was a pizza lunch date (with bubbles aka champagne) and he gave her a single yellow carnation, talked a lot about her “side hustles” aka her food blog, coaching, FMH and the pod (Ali didn’t mentioned the name on FMH), had an awkward half kiss during the date and then gave her a peck when they said goodbye, he had no night stands by his bed?, spent the night but told public pod they had a movie night, different kissing styles, 6 dates, broke things off with Ali two days before her first date with The Rower WHILE Ali was on a Halloween girls trip
The Rower
Dated from Halloween 2021 till early Feb 2022, Pisces who is 6 days older than Ali, has an ex-fiancé (they dated for 8 years, engaged for two of them, she broke off the engagement with him 1.5 years ago once he started dating Ali), has a shared dog with this ex, slept together around Xmas on the fourth date and Ali got a UTI, first time having “omg this is awesome sex” since ASV, first person Ali slept next to wearing an eye mask "that's a big step for me", had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, on New Years Day told her that he sees “long term relationship potential” with her but doesn’t want to be exclusive after 5 dates, “we didn’t talk all week”, he said he wasn’t as ready as he though to date someone seriously and “I don’t know why I don’t want to be in a relationship with you” they broke up over the phone, Ali said he’s a good human and wants to date someone like him, 3.5 weeks later Ali drunk texted him at 3:00 am saying “its really hard not to talk to you” which Ali said was a lie, he replied back (few days? A week later?) while Ali was on another date and it made her cry a bit, she replied back saying “the door is closed but not locked” in regards if he wants to get back together. “Fin… for now”

2022

The Discoball
Matched on Hinge but didn’t go on a first date for two week, Gemini, used to be a singer in a band, moved from DC to NYC, went on 7 dates in 2022, had a dog w/ ex and ex got full custody once he moved, met one of his friends on the second date, slept with him on the second date “morning and night”, he tried to find the podcast without knowing the name, podcasted from his house in DC, he would send Ali photos of them together “all the time”, gave a virtual presentation from his hotel room, did Molly together in DC, had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, moved to BK (didn’t see each other for 2 months pre-move), had a sex-less sleepover (a milestone for Ali), he showed up for her on her dad’s death date (something that a person she’s dating has never done), used to listen to the pod but stopped before they stopped seeing each other, ghosted her after they had a talk about moving things forward to exclusive and Ali texted him something along the lines of “your silence is the answer” when she didn’t hear back from him for a week and he ghosted her. Ali said he sucks in #77 AUA
Lisbon
The Brit
M&M
The Come Back Kid
They went on 2-3 dates in Nov 2018 and reconnected in May 2022, "felt immediately comfortable", sat next to a very drunk lady on their second 1st date and was supportive but "didn't step on Ali's toes" when the drunk lady said something offensive to Ali, couldn’t remember if they slept together or not, knows about FMH, ghosted Ali
The Trainer
The Cold Brew
The Nomad
3rd matchmaker match, reminded Ali of The Oyster, wanted kids and didn’t want to live in NYC forever, Ali was upset at first because her matchmaker was supposed to screen for that but the matchmaker DID check and it wasn’t mentioned when she was screening The Nomad, no second date because those are dealbreakers to him
The Catcher
Matched on Bumble, “good not great” after their first date, ~April 2022, talked about sports a lot on their first date
The Gentleman
4th matchmaker match, knew about Ali’s FMH socials before their date, Ali didn’t like his texting style, awkward intro on their first date “like hugging a 2 x 4”, he runs a dating event company and actually email Ali to be a guest on the pod when FMH first started, awkward goodbye, didn’t discuss the actual first date on the main pod because she doesn’t want to give him a reason to reach out again
The Tennis Pro
Ali had a good time on their date, “He is an adult, he’s mature” BUT “I don’t think he was into it”
The Padre
Matched on Bumble, 3 dates, from San Diego, “energy mismatch”, doesn’t want to know or listen to FMH, no psychical connection/kiss, only a kiss on the cheek on their last date, “I haven’t spoken to him since Friday night [a week]”, she didn’t want to do what The Threepeat did to her (break up while on vacation/traveling), she said it might be a MOO

Roark leaves and Erica joins the pod Oct 31st 2022

Captain Kirk
5th matchmaker match, found him on Bumble before their in-person date, ghosted Ali AND the matchmaker???
6th matchmaker match
Last match and Ali states she will not talk about this date or anything about it
JFK Kirk?
Matched on Bumble, didn’t realize he’s located in SD, exchanged personal instagram info, not sure where things went or how things ended

Kirk #1
Met in the wild, make out a lot the night they met, “stealing kisses throughout the night”, exchanged numbers, planned a date (no specifics, just the day) but when Ali texted him day of he asked to reschedule (no specifics again), he replied back that he’s picking up a rental car, told him she’s looking for someone to respect her time and he never replied back

2023

The Falcon
First date of 2023, matched on The League, first nickname was “League Kirk”, hard to talk to, felt like Ali was always reaching for the next topic, likes to travel, “there wasn’t a vibe”, MOO
The Roommate
Used to be her friend’s roommate and have met before (Ali doesn’t remember but it was the day after that exclusive convo with The Rower), “totally cute”, reunited at their mutual friend’s engagement party January 2023, made out at the bar, comes back to her place and sleeps over (no sex), Ali questions why her friends never set them up and its because he was taking a break from dating, first date they made out a lot at the bar (again), “I really felt like we were already a couple”, “It didn’t feel like a first date”, mentions her FMH content has popped up on his FYP, tried texting him after their date and he wasn’t giving effort, she’s glad she didn’t sleep with him because “one night stands aren’t my thing”, MOO
The Belgian
Matched on Bumble, accidentally had their first date during a trivia night at a bar, easy to talk to
The Viking
Ali forgot they had a first date on the day of said date
Tinder Man
Matched on Tinder (duh) on Valentine’s Day, first Tinder date in three years, good convo on first date but got a pushy vibe from him at the second bar they went to, put his hand up her sweater and was kissing her in the bar, made Ali uncomfortable and she told him that after her asked her on a second date
The Historian
Matched on Bumble, good conversation on the first date with a wide range of topics like “urban planning and its impact on feminism”, he’s in grad school
The Georgian
Matched on Hinge, he asked if she was free on Friday and she said yes but didn’t hear back from him in two days and in that time she made plans for Friday, rescheduled for a Saturday afternoon date at a dive bar, ate on her way to her date “it would be next level rude to eat on the subway”, good first date, talked about places he wants to take her to
The Publicist
Matched on Tinder, lives in BK, Jewish, one year younger then Ali, good first date, invited him to the Chaotic Singles Party that night, came over to Ali's apartment (which Ali said was messy) before and he made her favorite cocktail for her, a couple of listeners met him at the CSP, goofy and silly convo mixed with deep and serious convos, second date was at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens and a tasting menu dinner, he made a Resy reservation and Ali got an email saying she was added to it ”fuck receiving gifts, THAT’S my love language”, he's into words like Ali, he sneezed and Ali said "God bless you" but then corrected herself and said "gesundheit" and he leaned over and kissed her and said he loves that she cares about her words, he met her friends on the third date ”It felt so easy. It felt so comfortable”, her friends took “sneaky” picture and videos of them together which Ali said she loves a sneaky pic, took all their date recap videos on his phone, cooked Ali steak on their fourth date, "it's very comfortable", had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, Ali met two of his friends and some of his teammates he plays a rec sport with, had sex the day they took a trip outside of the city, Erica met him before their trip to Greece and I said “he’s dorky in a good way”, WhatsApp video chatted while in Greece and told her “see you in two days!” at the end of their call, said she felt less anxious about him compared to other relationships while on vacation, sent him a birthday present while she was in Greece, felt an energy shift coming back from vacation and didn’t hear back from him 3 days after she came home, Ali requested a call to talk about this distances she was feeling, ”I did the 12 date rule and it didn’t work!”, she said the distance help her see that they’re not compatible, went on a total of 9 dates. Ali talks about the “break up” on episode 123
Mr. Chaotic
Matched on Tinder but he saw Ali at the Chaotic Singles Party and Cassidy the host is there mutual friend, went to a brewery and played games on their first date (Ali said this was her favorite first dates in episode 147 where they recapped 2023), works in entertainment industry, very high energy, knows about FMH and he said she's entertaining to watch, splits his time between NYC and some unknown city, texted while she was in Greece, ”The man gives good texts”
Random Matchmaker Match
Withdrew his match to Ali because he found her FMH socials. Talked about on #71 AUA
Gone with the Wind
Matchmaker match, said some gross things about women in volleyball outfits on their first date, Ali told her matchmaker about this, ”I would describe him as misogynistic overall”, Ali was glad he did say those weird things so early on so she didn’t waste her time, the matchmaker flagged his account. This was around June 2023
The Rock
Ali knows him from an activity that they used to be involved with in the city (she's very vague about what this is) from 8 years ago, he had a very serious/long term GF when they met, follows her personal Insta, has never talked about him because he’s never been a “prospect”, summer 2023 they met up to catch up and found out that he’s now recently single but he’s moving out of NYC for work, Ali texts Cindy saying she thinks this is a date, Cindy said to tell him that you really want to kiss him, he ends up telling Ali “I really want to kiss you”, made out at the bar, Ali invited him back to her apartment and they had sex the night before Ali ended things with The Publicist, “one night stand vibes” but she said she was down to do it again, Patreon only and talked about on #75 AUA
The Tourist
Matched on Hinge, just moved to Brooklynn, went to a brewery in BK for their first date, Ali showed up to the date dripping in sweat, allergic to cats, he sent Ali a ‘no ghosting’ text the next morning
The Stout
Matched on Bumble, ”we had really great banter right away”, laughed the whole time on their first date, talked about going on a second date during their first date
Speed Racer
Matched on Bumble, drinks first date, axe throwing second date, made out after their second date, MOO, randomly texted Ali ~6 months later because he said one of Ali’s date recap videos about him popped up on his FYP (Ali and Erica think this is a lie), he thought Ali wasn’t into him, he claims he was doing all the work with texting even though there was only a few messages since they exchanged numbers after their second date
Billy Joel
Recently sober, Ali said she felt like they had several inside jokes before they met in person, ate pizza on her way to their first date, second date was getting coffee and going to the museum, they cooked dinner together for their third date at Ali’s apartment and they watched 90 Day Fiancé (he didn’t like it), he Googled how to clean a red wine stain when it spilled on her countertop, he asked if she wanted to have sex and she turned it down, the next day/the day before a 7am flight Ali booty called him and they had sex, she was drunk and said the sex wasn’t good/they stopped mid way, helped Ali pack for her flight, Ali said he’s at a crossroad and he doesn’t seem like a long term fit, Erica found a condom on the ground while cat sitting, Ali said she didn’t regret hooking up with him but wishes she hadn’t done it, MOO
Sales Cycle
30 seconds in and Ali said he was very boring, only really talked about his job, stared at Ali’s boobs, “might be a MOO”, texted her ‘merry christmas’

2024

Pie Guy/Dr. Laundry
Matched on The League, 34 years old, requested a nickname change from Pie Guy to Dr. Laundry, he had to cancel their second date because he got hit by a car, went on two dates, Ali sent him a pic of his subway stop saying something along the lines of “the stop isn’t looking as cute today” and turns out someone he dated with in that photo, were supposed to go on a third date the night she got back from a bachelorette party but he didn't answer her text when she said she landed, the next day he asked her how her trip was not acknowledging her previous text at all, Ali expressed her disappointment and he replied that he was tired last night, she said she would've been understanding if he said something then ghosted her
Andddd I stopped listening to the podcast around the Dr. Pie Laundry Guy but have stayed up to date with everything via this sub.
I have a huge interest in dating culture, human behavior and data similar to Ali and this little project of mine was really interesting once I got the framework of this list. I started this list once I found this sub in December 2023 and started re listening to the Patreon while working out (and lost 10 lbs ayeee) and writing down information in my notes app. I did my best to keep this list unbiased and just give facts and information that was said.
My own thoughts after making this list is that I'm very sad for Ali. I didn't realize the extent of her dating history. I think about my own dating history or even my friends who are in their 30's and dating and Ali's dating lore runs so deep. Is Ali unlucky with love? Did she pass on someone that could have been great for her? How has she had so many dates with little success in a long term partner or even going beyond 6-8 dates? Or is Skyline the person she has been waiting for? What's the pattern with all this dates/men? So many questions.
I truly do hope Ali finds her guy because I believe theres someone for everyone. Until then, I'll be hopping into this sub (cause y'all are too funny and give the best advice) and waiting for Ali to find Mr. Height.
Enjoy and I look forward to everyone thoughts! I'll keep my eye out for any edits that need to be made.
Bonus quotes:
“Longest relationship was a little under a year and a half. Haven’t made it past 6 months with anyone else” - AUA #7 11/27/21
“I spent the first 10+ years of my dating life being sort of perennially single” -1. The Actual First One episode 2/21/21
"I think my parent's story is the reason why I think that I can romantically get back together with an ex and it'll work out" -The Dave Glaser Podcast 4/5/21
“Almost every relationship I’ve ever been in, with a couple of exceptions, started as a situationship.” -21. The Undefined One 7/11/21
“All of my boyfriends have been white” -Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“You definitely need an older guy” -Cindy on Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“I’ve been on the dating apps since high school. Dating websites at the time” -Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“Who would be the perfect man for Ali?”
“Clearly a combination of the The Dentist and [the early stages of] The Buffalo” -Cindy on Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“Do you consider The Rower or Disco ball to have been situationships?”
“No, I don't consider either The Rower or The Disco Ball to be situationships” -question asked on TikTok 11/9/22

Hello,
I am an aspiring Catholic that hasn’t been baptized or confirmed in any Christian church. I would like to be initiated as soon as possible because I really like the church I go to (ICKSP Latin mass) and I don’t know how long I will even be able to go there after I move in a couple of months. (Recent college graduate) I feel like I know enough about Catholic/Christian theology for it to make sense too. I am a firm believer in the true presence, the holy trinity, the purpose of the sacraments, the authority of the church, the meaning of tradition and how it is just as valid as scripture as Saint Paul says. Would it even be possible to be baptized, given communion and confirmed in a month or so time? Please let me know, thank you.

Hey gang. My son (20yr) is starting to get into tattooing. I've been trying to encourage him to apprentice under someone out of a shop and as of now he's just been practicing from home on his friends. He's actually really good and could go a long way if he learned under someone. The thing is he doesn't feel like he has the time to apprentice since he has a FT job and has bills.
He's starting to go for his license which I think is great but I wanted to know the regulations for tattooing out of a home. I don't want to risk my home if something were to go south. I tried google but I don't see anything saying you can't. Just needs to be out of a licensed "shop".

I have a Friend who is a Writter, but not only they never publish any of their stories. When we stop so they can tell the stories tho, it's always about their character's suffering even tho they don't deserve it. They also mention how every character is based on themselves, and I personally believe that's why they're all so perfect, They write them as themselves, but keeps the flaws out and the only way to make the character "interesting" for "The public" is to make them Suffer.
Some friends of them, Me and some of their Teachers have mentioned how they need to stop, but we all just talk about it because of the writing itself. We say people won't be interested in characters that suffer if EVERY character suffers. Is like that quote from Syndrome from the Incredibles (2004) "Everyone can be a super! And when everyone’s super… no one will be."
I personally find concerning because recently I figured this might be related to something more psychological than just artistical and I wanted to talk about it with someone who actually knows a thing or two about the human psychic and not just someone who will agree or disagree with everything I say about it like they do, by saying "The suffering is necessary for character development"

i apologize in advance for somewhat of a long rant, but i am genuinely posting for advice on how to deal with this! please be aware that there are mentions of violence/abuse and misogyny and please don’t engage if it will be detrimental to your mental health
hi! i'm 19f, in college, and i'm home with my parents for summer break. i'm writing to seek advice on how to manage a relationship with my (fully black btw) father who, for all intents and purposes, simply hates women. (women as a whole but it seems he has a special kind of hate reserved for black women). he is a self-proclaimed "male chauvinist," (watches creators such as kevin samuels, pearl davis, etc etc) and i feel his ideology has gone a bit far. he is anti single mothers, believes women to be irresponsible, and once said to me and my black mother, and i quote: "black women are the cause of the downfall of the black community."
he also responded to a news story about a man murdering his children and wife by saying that "women should not provoke men." his response to the news about keke palmer and her abuse was that "abuse is wrong, but she shouldn't have danced with usher." his response to a gym friend of his murdering his wife was that "yeah, but you never know what people are going through."
given the way he thinks and his past history of alcoholism and physical/emotional abuse towards me (he threatened to rip my throat out when i was 14, and when i responded by saying that he would be in jail, he said "and you'd be dead" with a weird tone of satisfaction; etc etc), i do not feel he's created a safe environment for me to have more than a surface-level relationship with him. however, he seems to want a deep relationship with me so badly to the point where he will engage in attention-seeking behavior, especially when he sees me interacting with my mom, who i am much closer and feel safer with.
for example, once when i was doing my mom's makeup, he came in and commented about how he wished he could have those types of bonding moments with me. i didn't say anything because i didn't know what to say, and he then commented that we are going to miss him when he's dead. he makes these comments often, frequently saying that my mom and i (but mostly directed towards me) will regret treating him badly when he is dead. a few days ago, he made a comment like this and i didn't say anything because i think that's an immature thing to say in the first place, and i guess he got hurt and followed that up by saying he wishes he had a son.
i know that he says these things because he feels lonely and left out, and he feels like i don't like him. and i hate saying this, but i don't think i do like him. i love him as my father, and i respect and appreciate that he has physically been there for me my whole life. he got me dressed for school as a kid, taught me basketball, and has always been actively in my life. but i honestly don't think i like him, even though i respect and appreciate him as a father.
i can't tell him this obviously, but i don't know what to do when he asks me why i don't talk to him and share with him the same way i do with my mom. does anyone know how i can logistically navigate this? should i try and tell him how i feel again? (i have tried in the past and he seems to be stuck in his misogynist ways and simply isn't sorry for harming me in the past). is there any point in trying to bring some sort of reality to his red-pill talking points?
thank you if you've read this far and pls be nice <3
edit: i’m afraid i can’t completely cut him off, as my mom is so blindly loyal to him & will justify his behavior no matter what that if i cut him off, i will be cutting her off as well. and i love my mom so much.

My husband and I have been together for thirteen years this year.
Around a month after we started dating, we got engaged (fast I know) because he knew right away that I was his person.
From the start we knew we wanted a courthouse wedding with immediate family followed by a BBQ afterwards. Due to health issues, we had to delay it for several years, but once we were finally ready, we told our family about our plans.
Pretty much immediately my mother threw a fit, essentially manipulating us both into having a “proper” wedding. She told us that because I was her “only daughter”, she just wouldn’t accept anything other than a proper wedding and refused to go if we had a courthouse wedding.
Being the people pleasers we are, we agreed but told her it would have to be small both because of our anxiety and financial constraints.
She told us that finances wouldn’t be an issue because she would pay for everything and not to worry. We protested for quite a while before eventually giving in because we’d already felt like we’d lost at that point.
Heck we’d even considered doing our ceremony beforehand at the courthouse with only his family, but considering one of her closest friends would be the celebrant, there’s no doubt she’d find out and we wouldn’t hear the end of it so we complied.
We already knew it would be her wedding before it even began. It started with the wedding dress shopping. She made sure to pick a dress that covered my tattoos because they would look “tacky” if they were on show. So right away I knew she’d control the entire day.
We then brought up the fact that we wanted our dog to be involved as the ring bearer. We had bought her one of those wedding outfits a few years back when we saw it, but she flat out said no. Our dog is extremely well behaved and calm, so it wouldn’t have been an issue but again, she didn’t approve of dogs being involved so we had to have my youngest sister in law be the ring bearer (something we both didn’t want).
Then came the catering and cake. We both didn’t get a say in either, which were both full of food we didn’t eat, and our wedding cake was a coffee cake, despite us apparently ordering white chocolate (apparently it had been changed last minute).
The decor had to be entirely changed because apparently my scheme of lavender wasn’t practical so it was changed to a bright red. So far nothing was as we planned, so we were already dreading the day.
The guest list went from under 20 people to 50, most of which were extended family we never saw or spoke to and ALL of my mums close friends, which alone made up 12 people. Again, this was HER day.
The night before, while going through the wedding playlist, she demanded we change our first dance and fathedaughter, motheson dance song. Now I had picked these from the start, especially my husband and I’s song, which has been ours since the beginning of our relationship YEARS prior. Of course this had to change to a song she liked, as did the fathedaughter dance.
Fast forward to the wedding morning. My hair was being done and because I had it cut a few months prior due to a health issue making it fall out, the extensions looked ROUGH. Again, I had said that I needed them cut in to match (which I would pay for), but no, they would apparently look fine.
Then came the makeup, which I did myself and apparently had to do my sisters as well, leaving me little to no time to get ready. Mum demanded I remove my lip ring because again it was “tacky” and when I tried putting on a Lacey white bra, she lost it and demanded I remove it because it would “ruin” the dress. You couldn’t even see it underneath the sleeves of the detachable, Lacey coat!
This made me extremely uncomfortable and anxious because I NEVER leave the house without one and it’s not like I have the melons to fill it out without one!
As we were about to leave, she told me to take my glasses off because they would ruin the photos. You know, the glasses I use to SEE! So the entire day I was squinting in every picture, which essentially ruined the photos anyway!
Then she insisted I drink some champagne on the way there. I don’t drink because of the medication I’m on for my epilepsy but of course I had to because again, she made a big deal out of it being a “normal” wedding.
When we got to the location, I saw my younger sister in law (ring bearer), wearing the same dress she’d been wearing all week, complete with CROCS. I knew at that point she’d make it about herself somehow. She’s the most spoilt, selfish and self centred person I know and I was soon proven right when she rushed to the bathroom pretending to be sick before the reception began (later confirmed she wasn’t at all sick, just didn’t wanna be there).
Her mother (MIL) left before the reception because she couldn’t possibly be left at home alone despite living 2 minutes away and being 13 years old!
We were asked about her several times during the reception so yes, she still managed to make everyone focus on her.
The entire reception , my husband and I were panicking because we hate large crowds, especially when we are the focus (birthdays are the WORST). We had to keep going outside for air because we kept getting overwhelmed by everything.
When it was all over we went home and the next day, my mother and I were going through our gifts (mostly money) when she confiscated it all saying we wouldn’t spend it wisely and that she would keep it until we found something she considered appropriate.
Despite telling us not to bother about paying her back, she still manages to bring it up to this day, as does my brother, who cruelly taunted us leading up to the day, telling us that it was embarrassing that we were relying on the family to pay for our wedding and that he would never get married if he couldn’t afford it.
Essentially we were manipulated into having a bigger wedding despite only wanting a smaller wedding and accused of being ungrateful when we mentioned how anxious the day made us both.
I regret everything about that day and can’t even look at photos without getting anxious and upset. My husband and I never celebrate that day as our anniversary and honestly wish we had just gone ahead with our original plans and stood our ground.