Hey im looking for someone who can help me uncover who my dads dad is. I took the ancestry DNA test and got some good 1-2nd cousin matches but these people are not trying to help me really. Ive tried Facebook but it isn't really helping. Can someone please reach out that has experience at this and try to help me with this mystery.

Hi I'm 20F and this happened around 3 years ago. For proper context I will be explaining about my "friends" first. I'm sorry that this is a very longgghg one but I needed to get it out of my chest. Also forgive me for any grammatical mistakes as English is not my first language. I'll start with my 6 year long ex bestie Bee, in short she was a huge pick me. Since the beginning she used to insult me infront of boys to make herself look good. I didn't really realise it back then because I thought that's what friends do. She literally used to drag me around a bunch of boys and would call me fat, crooked legged and eagle nosed. Even my mom and my brother kept asking me to break the friendship but I was too afraid thinking I'll be alone. I always had her back though, she used to come to me crying if she's facing any issues in her life and I was there for her. I started my college around COVID time so the friends I made were through online meetings. Once we all met, we hit it off. It was really great!. My best friend in college was a guy named Shawn. We were really close and one day he came up to me and said "I like someone", me being me started investing who it could be. Then a girl named Penny from our friend group told me that Shawn had told her "someone likes you". I was like YESS I found it! And I did my part and now they are a couple. I was soo happy. After a month or so he came to me and said he wants to break up cuz she's too controlling and jealous and I took her side because I kinda understood her since he was still talking to his ex. It became too frequent though and I just told him do as you please. And one more important thing is her family is extremely strict like she can't even talk to a guy. So in college I used to sit in between them like they asked me to do that teachers don't doubt anything and complain to her parents. But the issue was I had to be around them the entire day and be ignored by them. I didn't mind at first but it got frustrating as time passed. I would try talking to them and they would just ignore me but they didn't want me to sit away from them either. The moment we walked out of college they would walk away from me leaving me alone. Next Anne and Chris. Mann are they messy. Anne had lots of boyfriends but we did not know it back then when we used to talk to her. Chris is a senior who proposed to Anne and she accepted it. One day a random guy texted me and asked me Anne's contact details and I refused to give it. He then sent me the photos of her kissing another guy. I blocked him and texted Anne about this and she accepted she was cheating on Chris. But Chris, Penny, Shawn and me were really close at this point. I told Chris about this and he confronted her, he said when she went to visit her hometown, she asked for a break and that's when the cheating happened and when she came back to City she dumped that guy from village and got back with Chris. Guess what, Anne went to Village again and she ghosted Chris. Chris started texting my then bestie Bee. I told both of them not to grow feelings towards eachother or to talk that much because I knew Chris only wanted to get back at Anne and whereas Bee would use Chris as timepass. I mean yeah it's their life but only I knew this about both of them. They were acting serious and both of them were my friends, i couldn't let them do this to eachother. Well they ignored me. They did complain about eachother a lottttt though and I gave the same advice to stop talking so much. Anne returned from her village and she got to know Chris is talking to Bee. She simply asked him to stop talking to Bee and he DID. He told Bee he doesn't want to talk to her and he texted me "I got my everything (Anne) so I don't need Bee anymore" Bee felt bad and I told her well atleast don't repeat it again because I know he will text you again and Anne will cheat on him again. In between all of this drama I met my boyfriend through a online game. I used to talk to him whenever Shawn and Penny were ignoring me and I stopped caring about them. And yes I had told them I felt very bad many times that they ignore me and for like 2 days when I was around them Penny would say "oh we should talk to her or she will feel bad" and then talk to me. It was embarrassing really. In short my boyfriend is a great guy who moved to my city. Mind you he was just 17 when he moved. He convinced his parents he needed to study in my City for ME. He made me realise how much more i deserved so I just stopped being bothered by my friends. I introduced all of them to eachother so they used to hang out without me as well. Penny asked Shawn to not to talk to me. Chris and Bee started talking again and Anne left Chris again. But both of them would constantly complain about eachother about how much they hate eachother. Another thing about Bee is the guys she was dating were usually my friends. Like I would introduce my friends to her and she would go snatch the boys up and would ask them not to talk to me. I didn't care because I wasn't attracted to those guys anyway. Once I told about my crush and she literally asked me "ask him to follow me hehe". I was like wtf no I can't ask him to do that. She followed him. He asked me "why is your friend following me and sent a message request" I told him the truth cuz I was just fed up with her. He blocked her lol. He told me not to have friends like her. Anyway she started texting my boyfriend as well. She used to say "when you come to City let's go out to eat, buy me that, buy me this blah blah blah". Little did she know I had his account and I knew she wasn't "busy" so she couldn't reply to me. She needed 2k because she borrowed it from her mom to give a random guy lol. He never returned it but she was crying so I asked my bf to lend her 1k for now. He told her "return to my gf in cash since my mom can see my transactions". She ghosted me after he gave her the money. I confronted Shawn and Penny. I told them I don't want to be their friend anymore because I was there for them always and whenever I texted them they would straight up ignore me. There were some rough words. I told Bee about this and I cried because I did share good moments with them. I also told her they are planning an outing for which they will invite Bee just to spite me and told her I'll feel very bad if u go. She went :). I just asked her to return the money asap and wanted to end it all. The thing is they hated eachother so why go and meet them when I am the one who is helping you when you are in need? Not just the money, I was standing up for her in so many occasions.
She said she can send the money online because she knew I can't say ok to that. I asked her cash she ignored me. I kept asking her decently. I got fed up and texted her mom asking the money and then Bee replied saying "don't act so cheap and text my mom" I'm like huh? If I'm cheap then what are you for taking the money and ghosting me? I told her I'm just asking what u owe me so give it. She said ik y you are asking, it's because I went out with them right, i didn't even know u would feel bad. I told her consider the money as charity and get lost. Blocked. Whereas Chris talked shit about my friend group so I fought with him and he said "you are a b'tch and you don't deserve anything". This happened before I broke friendship with Shawn and Penny and they never stood up for me. Shawn and Penny were beside me standing and seeing me arguing with Chris and said nothing. While the only reason I fought was for them. Funny because what happened later proved who deserves what. My boyfriend moved to City (nobody believed he would come). I topped my last 3 semesters(I was tutoring them during exams and wasted my time before. Now both of them were scoring Avg marks and Penny even cried in class after seeing her marks and mine). I got placed in a huge MNC Company (Chris being my senior was working as a janitor in a clinic, not to shame but just saying). Shawn and Penny apologised to me later on for talking to Bee after we broke out friendship because they realised the kind of person she is. Shawn also mentioned that she had asked him for money but he said no even though he had it lol. Chris and Bee were in a short toxic relationship until he dumped her again for Anne. Bee is also now with no real friends or no real boyfriend and was seeing hanging out with her sister on her bday(I used to take her to Cafes). I would have been with them if I hadn't met my Boyfriend. I don't regret the friendship because I did my part as much as I could. So AITA?

Hi I'm 20F and this happened around 3 years ago. For proper context I will be explaining about my "friends" first. I'm sorry that this is a very longgghg one but I needed to get it out of my chest. Also forgive me for any grammatical mistakes as English is not my first language. I'll start with my 6 year long ex bestie Bee, in short she was a huge pick me. Since the beginning she used to insult me infront of boys to make herself look good. I didn't really realise it back then because I thought that's what friends do. She literally used to drag me around a bunch of boys and would call me fat, crooked legged and eagle nosed. Even my mom and my brother kept asking me to break the friendship but I was too afraid thinking I'll be alone. I always had her back though, she used to come to me crying if she's facing any issues in her life and I was there for her. I started my college around COVID time so the friends I made were through online meetings. Once we all met, we hit it off. It was really great!. My best friend in college was a guy named Shawn. We were really close and one day he came up to me and said "I like someone", me being me started investing who it could be. Then a girl named Penny from our friend group told me that Shawn had told her "someone likes you". I was like YESS I found it! And I did my part and now they are a couple. I was soo happy. After a month or so he came to me and said he wants to break up cuz she's too controlling and jealous and I took her side because I kinda understood her since he was still talking to his ex. It became too frequent though and I just told him do as you please. And one more important thing is her family is extremely strict like she can't even talk to a guy. So in college I used to sit in between them like they asked me to do that teachers don't doubt anything and complain to her parents. But the issue was I had to be around them the entire day and be ignored by them. I didn't mind at first but it got frustrating as time passed. I would try talking to them and they would just ignore me but they didn't want me to sit away from them either. The moment we walked out of college they would walk away from me leaving me alone. Next Anne and Chris. Mann are they messy. Anne had lots of boyfriends but we did not know it back then when we used to talk to her. Chris is a senior who proposed to Anne and she accepted it. One day a random guy texted me and asked me Anne's contact details and I refused to give it. He then sent me the photos of her kissing another guy. I blocked him and texted Anne about this and she accepted she was cheating on Chris. But Chris, Penny, Shawn and me were really close at this point. I told Chris about this and he confronted her, he said when she went to visit her hometown, she asked for a break and that's when the cheating happened and when she came back to City she dumped that guy from village and got back with Chris. Guess what, Anne went to Village again and she ghosted Chris. Chris started texting my then bestie Bee. I told both of them not to grow feelings towards eachother or to talk that much because I knew Chris only wanted to get back at Anne and whereas Bee would use Chris as timepass. I mean yeah it's their life but only I knew this about both of them. They were acting serious and both of them were my friends, i couldn't let them do this to eachother. Well they ignored me. They did complain about eachother a lottttt though and I gave the same advice to stop talking so much. Anne returned from her village and she got to know Chris is talking to Bee. She simply asked him to stop talking to Bee and he DID. He told Bee he doesn't want to talk to her and he texted me "I got my everything (Anne) so I don't need Bee anymore" Bee felt bad and I told her well atleast don't repeat it again because I know he will text you again and Anne will cheat on him again. In between all of this drama I met my boyfriend through a online game. I used to talk to him whenever Shawn and Penny were ignoring me and I stopped caring about them. And yes I had told them I felt very bad many times that they ignore me and for like 2 days when I was around them Penny would say "oh we should talk to her or she will feel bad" and then talk to me. It was embarrassing really. In short my boyfriend is a great guy who moved to my city. Mind you he was just 17 when he moved. He convinced his parents he needed to study in my City for ME. He made me realise how much more i deserved so I just stopped being bothered by my friends. I introduced all of them to eachother so they used to hang out without me as well. Penny asked Shawn to not to talk to me. Chris and Bee started talking again and Anne left Chris again. But both of them would constantly complain about eachother about how much they hate eachother. Another thing about Bee is the guys she was dating were usually my friends. Like I would introduce my friends to her and she would go snatch the boys up and would ask them not to talk to me. I didn't care because I wasn't attracted to those guys anyway. Once I told about my crush and she literally asked me "ask him to follow me hehe". I was like wtf no I can't ask him to do that. She followed him. He asked me "why is your friend following me and sent a message request" I told him the truth cuz I was just fed up with her. He blocked her lol. He told me not to have friends like her. Anyway she started texting my boyfriend as well. She used to say "when you come to City let's go out to eat, buy me that, buy me this blah blah blah". Little did she know I had his account and I knew she wasn't "busy" so she couldn't reply to me. She needed 2k because she borrowed it from her mom to give a random guy lol. He never returned it but she was crying so I asked my bf to lend her 1k for now. He told her "return to my gf in cash since my mom can see my transactions". She ghosted me after he gave her the money. I confronted Shawn and Penny. I told them I don't want to be their friend anymore because I was there for them always and whenever I texted them they would straight up ignore me. There were some rough words. I told Bee about this and I cried because I did share good moments with them. I also told her they are planning an outing for which they will invite Bee just to spite me and told her I'll feel very bad if u go. She went :). I just asked her to return the money asap and wanted to end it all. The thing is they hated eachother so why go and meet them when I am the one who is helping you when you are in need? Not just the money, I was standing up for her in so many occasions.
She said she can send the money online because she knew I can't say ok to that. I asked her cash she ignored me. I kept asking her decently. I got fed up and texted her mom asking the money and then Bee replied saying "don't act so cheap and text my mom" I'm like huh? If I'm cheap then what are you for taking the money and ghosting me? I told her I'm just asking what u owe me so give it. She said ik y you are asking, it's because I went out with them right, i didn't even know u would feel bad. I told her consider the money as charity and get lost. Blocked. Whereas Chris talked shit about my friend group so I fought with him and he said "you are a b'tch and you don't deserve anything". This happened before I broke friendship with Shawn and Penny and they never stood up for me. Shawn and Penny were beside me standing and seeing me arguing with Chris and said nothing. While the only reason I fought was for them. Funny because what happened later proved who deserves what. My boyfriend moved to City (nobody believed he would come). I topped my last 3 semesters(I was tutoring them during exams and wasted my time before. Now both of them were scoring Avg marks and Penny even cried in class after seeing her marks and mine). I got placed in a huge MNC Company (Chris being my senior was working as a janitor in a clinic, not to shame but just saying). Shawn and Penny apologised to me later on for talking to Bee after we broke out friendship because they realised the kind of person she is. Shawn also mentioned that she had asked him for money but he said no even though he had it lol. Chris and Bee were in a short toxic relationship until he dumped her again for Anne. Bee is also now with no real friends or no real boyfriend and was seeing hanging out with her sister on her bday(I used to take her to Cafes). I would have been with them if I hadn't met my Boyfriend. I don't regret the friendship because I did my part as much as I could. So AITA?

(CHICAGO, IL) So my girlfriend went to go look at a facebook marketplace car last morning that was listed for $6000 and while we went to go look at the car, everything looked really good. It drove fine, no scratches or any significant red flags. (The title was from an Ohio dealership) She ended up purchasing the car for $5800, while at the DMV the lady told us that the mileage on the vehicle has been rolled back and that the mileage on the title has also been erased. The vehicle was listed at 86k miles and the carfax shows 200k Somehow we didn't notice before purchasing. The lady said we could still get plates but the mileage wouldn't be correct.(We refused for now) We tried to file police reports where we purchased the vehicle but the station said it'll be a civil matter and we would have to take it to court. The only info i have of the guy that sold the car is a phone number, first name(which may not be real) and a possible license plate. How would we go about that? How much would a lawyer cost in the state of Illinois? If anyone has been through this, please explain what some possibilities are. My gf is scared that it will suck her into debt with lawyer and court fees, she's also afraid of the process taking too much time. Any help is appreciated.

Hello, I have been taking care of my dad for a few years. His Dr recently told us to apply for ihss. After getting all his paper work filled out we went into the office on 3/1/2024 and turned in forms 295 and 873. I was trying to turn in my provider paperwork 426 and 846 and was told i couldn't till i got a provider number. I was given a number to call and get it and then turn paper work in after i did orientation. Once i completed it i went and got my livescan. I'm march 12 i dropped off all my paperwork. I was told it will take 40 days in la County to hear back. This past Friday i called the hotline because i still didn't know if i was approved to be a provider. She asked if i did orientation and i told her yes and so she said that ok I'm good to be a provider. So yay for that. But then i asked her if she had a status for my father. After he spoke to her she asked when we turned it in and i told her 3/1. She said wow you've waited so long. Then she told us that we didn't have a care number and we aren't even in the system. She told us that we need to call before and get a case number then turn in the paper work. Is that correct? I am very worried Cuz i was really hoping for the back pay but if i have to stay all over again it's gonna be another few months til we can get anything. I guess my question is. Is ahe correct should i get the number first then turn in applucation? Are we a lost cause till then ? Also can i do some of the classes i see you guys talk about while we wait? Only ask Cuz since I've been taking care of him I'm living off savings and now I'm at the point where I'll need to get a job if we can't get it figured out soon. Ty guys so much for the help in advance!

I'm back for part 2! We watched the second half of episode 2 and all of episode 3 (rip Jess & Randen). Here were my mom's thoughts on everyone remaining/eliminated during these episodes. I keep them brief but there we go.
Jess - “Didn’t like her, listening to her was agnozing because all she could think to talk about was her needing protein.” (She was grossed out at her eating a lot of ants.)
Randen - “I liked him, not really a strong impression”
Tiffany - “I really like her, she’s really good. A contender for sure, it was really impressive when she held back. She’s very emotionally smart.” (She LOVES Tiffany)
Kenzie - “I don’t really like, I’d try to vote her off probably for similar reasons.” (She sees her as a big threat and is really agreeing with his POV)
Q - “I like the football guy from the very beginning. It was brilliant how he handled Bhanu, he figured it out right away.” (She really loves Q, oh the spiral is going to be so funny to watch)
Bhanu - “He should’ve never been on. He just can’t think straight. It’s too strategic for him.” (She went from being kinda neutral to wanting him gone so fast haha)
Venus - “Don’t like her at all she’s whiney. They ran over her toe, they ran over her toe, just move your toe? That’s all you had to do.” (Not a fan it seems. She was rolling her eyes the whole time she spoke)
Hunter - “Love him, Mississippi man? I love Mr. Macguyver, I would want him on my team.” (She liked his backstory and how he looked at it).
Tevin - “Like him. He seems to be giving it a lot, good with relationships.” (Not much to add here).
Soda - “I underestimated her at first. She’s a strong contender and has good thoughts.” (She's really liking Soda, I think a lot of it comes from her not liking Venus and Soda being very rational in how she approaches the disconnect)
Liz - “Is she the one who owns all the companies? Kinda insufferable.” (HELP this is going to be a funny thing to watch her analyze)
Charlie - “He’s clearly got skills, he threw bags well. He’s somebody I underestimated at first I think.” (I think she's mixed on him, not a huge fan yet but I think she'll warm up to him)
Tim - “I don’t have a real sense of him, they really haven’t featured him?” (Yeah, sounds about right.)
Maria - “She’s tough, I think she’s a contender, I like her still.” (Mom vibes!)
Moriah - “Was she the one who drew the white rock? Oh that was Liz? I don’t have much of a sense of her.” (Second episode in a row she thought Moriah was Liz, rip)
Ben - “He’s entertaining and likable, not all about himself! It’s good.” (She was laughing during the journey when he was making all the rock puns)
Jem - “I didn’t like her from the get go. She’s such a threat, they need to get rid of her or she’ll make the end.” (Kinda surprised she caught onto Jem before she found the beware, but now she's like Jem needs to go!!)

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/WholePomegranate5342
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest
My Parents Tried to Screw Over My Dying StepMother, Blew Up All Of Our Lives Instead
Trigger Warnings: infidelity, imminent death, terminal illness, financial exploitation, physical assault, emotional abuse and manipulation
Original Post: February 13, 2024
Throwaway for obvious reasons.
My (17F) stepmother "Jane" is a wonderful, wonderful woman. She and my father got married when I was 4, and she's been a rock in my life ever since. My mother was always my primary caregiver, but up until that point her relationship with my father was acrimonious and I basically never saw him. Jane was the reason they developed a stable co-parenting relationship, she encouraged everyone having a good relationship with each other and was always there to support me and my mom when things got rough.
Jane was always a really hard worker. When she met my dad, he was living out of a hotel and my mother was doing everything in her power to keep me away from him because she was petty and angry that their relationship didn't work out. Meanwhile Jane had a great job, a nice house, helped my dad get back on his feet, negotiated a visitation schedule with my mom (who hated her for a long time), and made sure my dad sent us money every week because neither one of them could afford an attorney to negotiate child support payments. Jane had no reason to do any of these things but as I got older she made it clear that she loved me as much as she loved my (half) brothers who were born a few years later. I even have my own room in her house because at the time we lived with my grandparents / various boyfriends of my mom and Jane felt that I needed a more stable environment than that. She's like the opposite of the evil stepmom.
When I was 15, Jane won a big lawsuit against an airline company and got awarded upwards of a million dollars. She used the money to build sizable trust funds for me and my brothers so that we would be taken care of later in life. Despite having a lot more money she still wanted to live a fairly modest life, so she paid off the house she has and has been living there ever since with my dad. Sure she bought a new car and they went on a few nice vacations but she didn't blow all her money on stupid things, which I respected.
About a year ago, things started getting really weird. Whenever I saw Jane she seemed to look sicker and sicker, but no one would tell me or my brothers why even though I know they knew. All we knew is that she was at the hospital a lot. Around the same time, my mom has been coming around my dad a lot more and acting really strange, basically like she was trying to romance him. Whenever Jane was in the hospital my mother would insist on spending the night at their house and playing mom to my brothers, which was so weird to me because she never liked them or Jane. She'd be the perfect little housewife and my mom is NOT like that at all. It was super fake.
Worst of all, my dad started falling for it. I'm not stupid - I'm pretty sure they were sleeping together. I tried to shield my brothers from it but they're not dumb either. I tried talking to my dad too but he insisted it wasn't like that.
Then a few weeks ago, my mom started talking about all the places she'd like to visit, how she wanted a new car and was looking to invest... which is weird because my mom has been a bartender her whole life and has lived paycheck to paycheck since before I was born. She was acting like she was about to get a lot of money, which started to make me really suspicious. Between Jane being sick and my mom acting all nouveau riche, I had a lot of questions.
Finally I decided to visit Jane in the hospital and ask her about my trust fund. I found out that if anything happened to her, that my dad would inherit all the money including full control of the trusts for me and my brothers. She asked me why I was so interested in the trust fund so I told her what's going on with my parents and how my mom has been acting with my dad. I didn't want to but after everything she did for me, she deserved the truth. It really hurt me to break her heart like that, especially once I found out that she was basically in hospice at this point because of irreversible kidney failure. She's only got a few more months. We both cried so much.
Then, two days ago everything came to a head. My mom stormed in furious and started arguing with my dad. Apparently Jane met with her lawyer and changed the trust so that my dad would get nothing and all of the trusts would be controlled by my step-aunt. She demanded to know how Jane found out about their relationship and I came out and told them that I told Jane everything. I told them that if they wanted to play stupid games they would win stupid prizes and that I wasn't going to let them screw Jane over after all the help she gave my family when she didn't have to.
My mom slapped me and my dad just looked so defeated. Then my mom told my dad that she didn't really love him, that she was just pretending to so he would marry her and she could get all of the money. The worst part about it is that my brothers witnessed the whole thing and now on top of their mom dying they have to deal with a cheating dad and his vindictive ex. Our whole family is in ruins and I feel like it's my fault even though I know it's not.
Yesterday I visited Jane again and told her about the fallout. She apologized and said that she had to dissolve my trust fund to make sure my mother didn't get a hold of the money, but that as "her oldest" I will inherit the house/property after she is gone and that's worth more than the other two trust funds combined. My father won't get anything because she's going to divorce him before she dies, and honestly I'm happy for her. She made me promise to take care of my brothers and told me that once I turn 18 this summer I can kick my dad out of the house if I want to. And I FULLY plan to do that btw.
I haven't talked to my dad since and I can't even look at my mom. I can't believe they would conspire to do this to Jane after all this time. Just proof that they deserve each other and I'm embarrassed that they're my parents. Once I turn 18 I'm going to cut my dad out as much as I can and cut my mom out completely. I hope she rots. Meanwhile I'm going to try and be at the hospital as much as I can until Jane passes away.
Anyways. I just needed to vent. I'm really messed up about the whole thing and I feel super betrayed, although I can't even begin to imagine how Jane feels. I'm gonna be so f-ed up when she dies. I can't even think about that right now. But at least she's not surrounded by people who just want to bring her down.
Thanks for reading.
Edit: Some people are asking a lot of the same stuff so I'll just clarify here --
My brothers - My plan is to use some of the estate money fight for guardianship for my twin brothers so that they can live in the house while I kick my dad out. If I can't get guardianship then I will have to let my dad stay in the house. However once I turn 18 I will technically be an adult so even if my dad leaves I'm still legally able to be responsible for them. The only thing I won't be able to do is stop him from taking them if he leaves. But they will be 18 in six years so even if they do have to leave they will always be able to come back whenever they want. In a perfect world my dad would just leave and let my brothers stay with me which I'm sure my bio-mom would be very supportive of because right now she hates all of us and I doubt that will change anytime soon.
The trust - from what I understand, my brothers will inherit 1/3 each of the estate and the remaining 1/3 will be used to keep the house running until they turn 18. After that it will be up to me if I want to keep the house or sell it. At that point my brothers will still have money left in the trust so they can branch out or do whatever they want, otherwise I will not sell the house and just pass it on to them or keep it and maintain it myself and they can just stay with me as long as they need to.
(Edit to the edit) So I just spoke to Jane and she told me that the reason she dissolved the trust is because originally it was going to be split 3x between us kids and my dad would inherit the house. She dissolved my 3rd and switched it over to make it to take care of the house maintenance, and instead put the house in my name so my dad wouldn't get it. Plus by doing that at least financially I would be getting a much bigger share (the house is worth about 1.5x the amount of my brothers trusts) I just wouldn't be able to do anything with it until my brothers are 18, which I'm totally cool with. Sorry if I don't have a better answer but I'm just trying to translate what she told me.
My parents - The big fight happened on Sunday and I haven't spoken to either of my parents since, I think they're both at my mom's place right now but that's fine with us because we're all still mad at them so they can stay gone for all we care. I know technically that's not legal to just leave us alone but I've been taking care of my brothers for over a year I can handle a few days while he gets his shit together. Screw both of them.
Hope that clears some stuff up.
TLDR; My bio parents tried to screw my terminally ill stepmother out of trust fund money, but she caught on and now no one on my side of the family gets anything.
Additional Information from OOP on her parents, stepmom’s health, trust funds

OOP: (Why isn't Jane on dialysis) - I don't remember the exact details but Jane has a genetic condition where she gets cysts on her kidney. She already had a transplant a few years ago but now she developed problems with her arteries or something in her legs so she doesn't qualify for dialysis. She could get another transplant but she doesn't want to because the last time was so traumatic (rejections, etc). So she decided to just let herself go onto maintenance medications to prolong her death until she gets her affairs in order. She has a few other health problems that make the typical treatments really dangerous and according to her she'd rather die surrounded by loved ones than on an operating table.
(Dissolving the trust fund) - Jane told me she didn't technically have to do it, but she didn't trust my bio parents not to do something shady and get a hold of the money before I turn 18. Even if my aunt controlled the fund my dad would still be able to collect if something happened to Jane before I turn 18. Her lawyer suggested it's better safe than sorry and I agreed that it was the best option. I'm not an expert tho I don't know the details.
(How my mom knew) - Like I said before I'm pretty sure Jane told my dad, who then told my mom and that's how the argument started. I can't think of any other way and I didn't really care enough to ask.
(Jane's thoughts on my mom) - she didn't know my mom was doing all of that. My mom has her own place and would only come over whenever Jane was in the hospital for a few days at a time. I've been living with my dad for a little over a year so he probably told Jane that my mom was there to spend time with me, if he told her at all. Besides she didn't "move in" until a few months ago, which I guess is when they started hatching their plan. Jane never outright banned my mom from visiting so there really wasn't anything she could do.
Hope that helps.
Edit for the last part: The remainder of the money belonging to the estate that hasn't been put into trusts for my brothers is going to be used to maintain the house (utilities, taxes, etc) until my brothers are 18 and then I can either choose to sell the house or keep it and maintain it myself if I'm able to. I plan to go to school in that time and get a better job with the goal of keeping the house, but if I can't then I have the option to sell it. Not that I will but that's how it was explained to me.

OOP on her stepmom and their relationship, provides thoughts on her bio mom

OOP: Honestly it's because she's more of a "real" mom than my actual mom.
My bio mom is kind of ambiguous about my existence but Jane was always extra involved, sending me to sports teams and paying for dance classes and just showing interest in my hobbies as I got older. Plus as the only girl I think we bonded on a level she can't with my brothers so she always made sure to let me know I was on equal terms with them. When I was younger we would watch movies and have girl time where it was just us 1:1 and those are some of my best memories with her.
Jane is also really mature and someone I wanna be like when I get older whereas it feels like my mom is a teenager in an adult's body. She was constantly picking fights with my dad about dumb things and Jane was always there to smooth things over and keep my best interest at heart over her own feelings. I know my mom made Jane's life really difficult for a long time but Jane never complained or said anything to me about it whereas my mom CONSTANTLY complained about Jane. As I got older I just always felt more at peace when I was around Jane than when I was around my mom.
If you want your step kids to love you just be there for them and treat them like your own. Ignore whatever drama you have with your husbands ex and just love your kids. Trust me if you really care about them they will know.

Relevant Comments
mattdvs1979: My only advice is make sure you work with a lawyer once she passes so you get your inheritance and your parents can’t try to intervene, and then you keep your promise to use that money for you and your brothers’ welfare.

OOP: Oh absolutely, Jane already gave me the lawyer's info and between him and my step-aunt I'm sure I will be able to do what I need to do for them. I don't even care about the money, most people don't have trust funds and turn out just fine. I'm actually more glad that she gave me the house because you can be damn sure it's going to be a safe space for my brothers whether I end up getting custody of them or not. My brothers are basically Jane's legacy so my goal is to give them the life and guidance that I got from her, and that they won't get because she'll be gone.

OOP on the relationship between her father and her stepmom before they got exposed

OOP: Honestly it hurts a lot because before Jane got sick they seemed to have the perfect relationship. Until my birthgiver (I like that) came in and fucked everything up with her toxic personality. Honestly in a perfect world my mom will end up broke and alone and in a shitty nursing home with bed sores. And when she calls me and begs me for a relationship (because she needs the attention) it'll feel so good to hang up on her over and over again.

OOP on Jane (stepmom)’s health and if Jane is mentally okay on the whole situation

OOP: I think so. Apparently it's a genetic disease so she always knew she was going to get sick she just didn't know when so mentally I think she was prepared for it. I just hope that she can find peace knowing the truth and knowing that I'll be there to make sure her sons don't grow up all fucked up.

OOP on her brothers getting therapy to deal with their mom/step-mom’s health and her imminent death

OOP: Yeah. I've already sat them down and talked to them about what's going on, they seem to understand but they're understandably really sad about the whole thing. I told them that when they go to school they should ask about a grief counselor and I'm trying to get their health insurance info from Jane so I can find them a therapist for kids. As much as all of this sucks I think it's brought the three of us a lot closer together.
Thanks a lot. I really love my brothers and I know it's my job to take care of them properly now that they won't have a mom around. Jane did so much to raise me and my brothers won't have the opportunity so it's only right that I help them.
Since finding all of this out my plan has always been to have my brothers live with me, I'm already in charge of taking care of them and the house for the most part the only thing my dad does is help pay the bills. Unfortunately I won't be able to kick my dad out as long as he's their legal guardian which is why I'm trying to find some other solution to that. But if/when that gets resolved he can live under a bridge for all I care.

 
Update: May 8, 2024 (3 months later)
Please check my profile for my previous post. :)
Hi guys it’s me again, a lot of you asked me for an update on my situation with Jane and my family so I’ve come back with a few things that have happened since I initially posted. I will try to organize this in a way that addresses the major points of last time.
Jane is still alive and doing surprisingly well considering the circumstances. She’s always been a fighter and although her disease has been progressing she’s keeping a positive attitude with everything that is going on. She says she’s grateful that she was able to see everyone’s true colors before she passed so she could go into the next life knowing the truth. We have become so unbelievably close in the past few months and it’s getting harder and harder to know that she’s getting close to the end. She doesn’t ever talk about it though and I know it’s because she doesn’t want to hurt me but we both know the situation so we’re just making the best of our time. I'm also not being completely transparent about all of the drama at home but tbh I don't think she needs to hear all of that.
We did end up having that surprise celebration of life that I planned, a lot more people showed up than I thought but they all got an airbnb near the hospital where Jane is and we were able to take her out and spend some time at the lake near the facility. It was super lowkey which I know Jane preferred and I was even able to get her old college friend to come after I found him on Linkedin lol. We had food and there was music and we played games and it was overall a really great time, except Jane started crying at the end but she promised me it was just because she was grateful.
My brothers are also doing okay, my aunt (Jane's sister) is currently paying for them to go to therapy and they've become a lot more open about talking about the situation. They just turned 13 but a lot of the time it feels like I'm talking to actual adults lol. They've become really independent lately (in a good way) and aside from me driving them places I don't really have to do much for them anymore. Their grades aren't super great but they're not failing and considering the circumstances it could be a lot worse. They still hang out with friends and I'm keeping an eye out for like depression symptoms and stuff.
The situation with my mom is as funny as it is embarrassing tbh. She spent a few weeks ignoring us and then she tried to crawl back into my life basically begging me to let her move in because her lease is about to expire and she has nowhere to go. That convo went about as well as you'd think and she ended up calling me an ungrateful b**** and that I couldn't just ignore her because she's my mom. I told her to get out of the house before I call the cops and to go back to my dad (who at that point was only coming home every few days to "check on us" and grab some clothes.)
After that she tried coming by a few times and when I wouldn't open the door she would lose her mind and start yelling through the neighborhood. After three instances of this I finally called the cops but because I'm 17 they told me there's a possibility that I would have to go home with her since technically I'm a minor and need to be with the custodial parent. I told them no way because I was the only one watching my brothers atm. That led to a whole thing where after a few hours my dad basically showed up and I was allowed to stay there because there was finally an adult present and I'd basically lived there for over a year.
After that the cops firmly told my mom that if she keeps showing up and causing drama (my neighbors confirmed that she'd been there a few times screaming) that they would arrest her for trespassing since technically it was Jane's house and not hers. She left and hasn't tried coming to the house anymore but for a while she would call me constantly telling me I owed her and all kinds of stuff. She's now blocked on everything and anything she needs to say to me gets filtered through my dad.
As for my dad... well, since he's basically required to be here for another 2 months until I turn 18 we've basically just avoided each other. It's not too bad though because I've been heavily relying on guilting him for everything to get my way. For example he was going to contest the divorce but I threatened to kick him out when I turn 18 if he does that so he just signed all the paperwork for a "quickie divorce" and is basically doing whatever Jane tells him to do. I don't openly disrespect him or anything (he's still my dad) but I've made it clear that I have no intentions on doing anything he says ever again and he doesn't fight me on it. Most of the time he's just in his room and sometimes he'll go back to my mom's but only for a day or two before they argue and she kicks him out again lol. I haven't decided whether or not I'll kick him out yet and we haven't talked about it either so I'm kind of playing it by ear.
As for me, I'm handling everything as good as I can. I found a new job where I make a little more money so I've been focusing on saving as much as I can and just being there for my brothers. Between working and school and visiting Jane I've been so busy I haven't really had time to really stop and think about everything, but I know it'll come. One of my friends has really stepped up and helped me manage everything and I'm super grateful to him for being there for me and my brothers so we'll see how that goes.
Anyways I wish I had something more exciting to share but that's what's happened since my last post :) Thanks again for all the support on my last post.
Relevant Comments
OOP on the possibility of her stepmom being poisoned from her parents to get Jane’s money

OOP: Hi there,
A few people have mentioned this and yes we are absolutely certain she is not being poisoned, it’s a genetic disease causing her kidney failure and we have known about it for a long time but she shielded us from the worst of it hence why her “sudden” decline in health was such a shock to us, we thought she had more time.
My brothers have also been screened for this disease and thankfully neither of them have it.
Edit to add: I’m turning 18 in a few weeks so I don’t need to get emancipated and my dad has already agreed that my brothers will stay in the house with me because they have nowhere else to go.

OOP on Jane making video clips for her brothers

OOP: Yes actually a few people suggested this on my last post and we have been doing this for a few weeks now. Jane has a little digital recorder that she’s been putting her thoughts down on and she’s also written a few letters to us for major milestones. My brothers do not know about this as we want to surprise them but that said they have been coming to the hospital more now that they’re in therapy and able to deal with it. I know they do not want to have any regrets even though it’s a difficult situation.

OOP on her father after being exposed and her bio mom trying to manipulate him

OOP: I do think he’s remorseful, he hasn’t said it but the way he’s acting is telling me that, he’s being really passive when normally he gets a little belligerent if he really feels like he didn’t do anything wrong. Also I know I have every reason to kick him out but he’s still my dad even tho what he did to Jane was terrible. He’s just kind of a weak minded person and my bio mom really manipulated the crap out of him and continues to manipulate him but I can tell he’s getting tired of her BS because he’s spending less time with her.
He didn’t know she was showing up at the house and when he found out he was super pissed at her, they’ve been fighting nonstop and I can tell he’s not as much under her spell anymore because he’s at home more but who knows.

 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

As the title states, I caught a legit shiny Smeargle by chaining with poke radar in platinum. Admittedly, I used PKSM on my 3DS to edit the EV's but nothing else (a mistake I have now acknowledged, concerning legality.)
Either way, I'm having trouble getting this Smeargle to obtain a "Legal" status thanks to invalid PID correlations. I've tried using RNGReporter and input her IV's and nature but no "Method" is available, thus no PID is available for me to copy into PKHeX.
I admit, I'm poking around in shit that I know nothing about... but I'm here to learn and am all ears if it means being able to have a legally obtained green tailed Smeargle again. I know in the grand scheme of things, the legality doesn't really matter but it matters a hell of a lot to me.

This daily thread is designed to be a place for all the funny discussions on PPD.
Feel free to post off-topic questions, information, points-of-view, personal advice and memes in this thread. Here you can post everything that doesn't warrant its own thread or just do some socializing. Personal advice posting, research posts, non-TOS breaking rants, links to other locations with limited context as conversation topics (must use np links for reddit), and things would be considered low effort posts are allowed in the daily thread.
Do not bring other PPD threads into the daily thread. Do not post PPD threads deserving of their own post in the daily thread. The intent of the daily thread is not that it should replace PPD and become a place where users can avoid the rules of the subreddit. Attempting to do this will be considered circlejerking and moderated as such.
Black Pill/Incel Content/Woe-Is-Me is still banned in the daily thread. Witch hunting and insults are also still banned in the daily thread. Relegated topics must still go to in the weekly threads for those topics.
Comments are automatically sorted by NEW - you can post throughout the day and people will see your comment.
If you'd like to see our previous daily threads, click here!
​
Please Join Us on Discord! Include your reddit username, pill color, age, relationship status, and gender when you get in to introduce yourself.
​
Also find us on Instagram and Twitter!

We found a dog a few days ago. She appears to have been bred several times, and while she had a collar, she is thin. She is very sweet and seems to be crate trained. We took her around the neighborhood, posted on the local Facebook pages, checked in with the local shelters, and no owners have come forward. We took her to vet, and she was not chipped, and they seemed to think she was used for breeding and then dumped. She really loves my husband, and we decided we wanted to keep her unless her owners came forward because she was just the perfect dog, housebroken, quiet, and appeared to be good with the kids (5 & 2 boys).
Anyway, yesterday, my 5 year old was standing near my husband while the dog sat in my husband’s lap. My son started bouncing around excitedly about something, and she snapped at him. We told her no and reminded our son that dogs don’t really like sudden movements.
Today, she was also sitting with my husband, and my 2 year old gave her a kiss. She bit him in the face. I know lots of dogs don’t like little kids in their face, but I also just feel like it’s not worth the risk to keep her. It won’t be the last time my sons get in her bubble, and she seems aggressive toward them just for being near. There were a couple of times they would walk by her crate and she’d charge at them angrily while crated for just standing nearby.
My husband and I are going to try to give her to a neighbor who expressed interest (older lady with no kids) or a rescue, but I feel like a jerk because she really likes us and seems so genuinely happy to be here. She probably could receive behavioral therapy etc. but we honestly don’t have the time nor money to sink into it. We both work full time, kids have sports and stuff, and I’m in grad school.
It’s the right decision….right? The animal lover in me feels terrible! It’s a bummer because my husband and I really like her a lot, but I just feel like we can’t have a dog that bites our kids. It’s not fair to our children to be unable to exist comfortably in our house without fear of being bitten.

i have this issue since i started playing the game (2 months) it is a real weird problem actually so when i join a world the first 10 seconds works normal i can see myself talking in game on the bottom left screen and my friends can hear me aswell but then after 10 seconds this weird bug/problem appears my mic stops working i cant hear my friends eighter in game and in my friends screen i go from in servegame status to on the menu status sometimes i appear offline alltogheter i tried everything i surfed google for days done all solutions set my mic to default recording/communications device on control panel allow the game to use my mic in the privacy settings (windows 11) switch between area/team/auto to reset toggle push to talk on and off double/triple checked to make sure everything is in order this problem only happens in this game other games work crystal clear discord runs fine now some of you may say use discord to talk with your friends while playing but the thing is we do rp sometimes interact with other players while my friends do rp i just stand there in the back doing nothing it started really getting frustrating what causes this ????

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Accurate-Raise6440
I gave my husband an ultimatum, quit his job or I'm leaving
Originally posted to Marriage
TRIGGER WARNING: hostile workplace, emotional distress, struggles with physical and mental health, extreme burnout
Original Post May 6, 2024
Let's preface by saying that I love him, I don't want to leave him but I can't keep seeing the man I love killing himself for a company that doesn't value him.
My husband got promoted to Sales Director last year, and we were very happy about it at first. But then his life (and my own) became hell. The company is struggling and is dealing with numerous lawsuit from clients. My husband knew nothing of this when he was brought on as Director.
He works every single fucking day from 8AM and comes home late, even past midnight. Often he works full Saturdays as well. He has lost weight and his hair is already graying. One night he didn't come back home and I panicked. I called his company and they wouldn't tell me where he was. He reached out to me around midday and I learned he had been hospitalized for heart palpitations. Doctors advise him to take more exams because he risks an heart attack.
He is just 36 but looks ten years older. His company uses and abuses him (I heard him talking to his bosses on phone calls, the way those people talk to him...) and he is too beaten down to leave. I'm friend with his deputy director (funny thing, I suspected they were having an affair at first, but she became a great friend for me) and she's actively looking to leave.
We tried to drill this into my husband, to no avail. I have been polite, I have been rude, now I'm just done. I don't want to watch him die.
I gave him the ultimatum: quit this fucking job or I am gone. He is worried about the money, but I work and I can be the breadwinner while he recuperates and looks for a new job. He seemingly took me seriously but for now has not quit, he has taken sick days. And he has really fallen sick now.
I can't take this anymore. I love this man, and I am watching him kill himself for people that wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
Embarrassed_Sky3188

You are right, but he can't hear you right now. Keep pushing. Would it help to have the deputy come over, and they both agree to leave? It's possible they are (appropriately) close (possibly trauma bonded) and he doesn't want to leave her behind.

OOP

We already had this talk with him. She says that if he walks, she's walking with him. He won't budge and says he doesn't want her to lose her job for him.

~
Unfair_Finger5531

I don’t blame you. I don’t like ultimatums, but sometimes they are needed. You can’t just stand by and watch him work himself to death.
I hope he’s at least getting some rest on his sick days.

OOP

I had to take away the phone because they kept pestering him for every little thing. I am angry and I am scared, I can't live like this but I know that if I leave those people might end up killing him.

OOP GIVES A LITTLE UPDATE IN THE COMMENTS
Here's the plan. Tonight his deputy will come over and we will draft their resignations. I decided to take this off my husband's hands, I am quitting his job for him.
We won't forward the resignations right away because first I want to collect proof of the mistreatment and psychological abuse. If my husband gets better I will be all too happy to forget about those people.
But if he has a heart attack or dies, I am suing the crap out of them. I am sitting beside him, he's been sleeping nonstop and I check he's breathing because I am so fucking scared he might die in his sleep. Doctor said it's just a fever but if he's not getting better by tomorrow I am taking him to the hospital.
Those people are killing him.
(Update) I gave my husband an ultimatum, quit his job or I'm leaving May 8, 2024
I thought on it and I am convinced that if I leave, he might literally die, so I decided to take the situation in my hands.
Tonight his deputy director came over and we drafted my husband's and her resignations. We decided to not submit them right away, but to use their emails and accounts to find proof of the company's mistreatments and abuses. They had him work 16 hours a day and pressured him to the point of giving him heart problems. Now he has taken sick leave and barely get out of bed, he just sleeps and I have to check he's breathing because at this point I am scared he might die in his sleep.
The doctor said it's just a fever but there's also physical and mental exhaustion, and he needs to rest. I wake him up to get him to drink some water and eat something. I have to help him get up and walk to the bathroom. Tonight I made it clear he is not going back to the job, and he agreed. His deputy director spoke with him too and told him hearsay is that the company is going to collapse and close down by next fall, so they need to get out now.
There's not much to add. I spent the evening with her and we wrote the resignations and went through his emails, but we didn't find much. I broke down a bit and cried on her shoulder, I am so bottled up I needed to let some out.
That's all for now. I wish to thank everyone whom gave me advice and compassion for our situation. I will be taking care of my husband but I am so angry and sad. Those people destroyed the man of my life,I want to be hopeful but I'm not sure he will go back to how he was before.
Wish us luck.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
hey_nonny_mooses

Best wishes that you can both recover from this. He will need to recover his health and figure out why he was complacent in their abuse. You will have to figure out how to trust your husband not to martyr himself again. I hope you can both heal and perhaps get some counseling.

OOP

Thank you. I don't know when or if I'll trust him to have a healthy work life balance. I made it clear to him he's staying home at least for a month now.

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

**Hi! I ended up connecting my Facebook account to my Instagram just to share stories and the damn app automatically changed my photo just today to it's profile pic.
I disconnected or deleted the account of my metasphere thing. I might only use Facebook on my PC now.
Pisses me off. I am trying to keep that content separate.
I am really hating how apps... Snapchat, Facebook, insta, (all meta sphere), even telegram is automatically adding my contacts or doing things against my consent.
I just got doxxed for my telegram account with this creep who got my number two years ago. So fucking scary, I plan on eventually getting a separate phone or logging in on my tablet, to avoid mishaps in the future when I redownload an app.
Stop forcing people to be connected all the time. I want space and privacy.**

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Nocontact4you
None of my family knows this trip will be the last time they see me.
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest & Poems
Thanks to u/lolfuckno for suggesting this BoRU
TRIGGER WARNING: Infidelity, cancer, ableism, bullying, abandonment, emotional abuse of a child, verbal abuse, neglect, lies, mentions of miscarriage
MOOD SPOILER: Depressing
Original Post Feb 4, 2024
Firstly, I’m okay, physically anyway.
Honestly, I have no idea who this is for, but I think I just need it out of my head.
The circumstances of my birth were complicated. I broke up two marriages, and my family has never been shy about how they feel about me for that. Only one of my brothers has gotten drunk enough to tell me to my face that he resents me for existing, but I know it exists within all of them, at least in some way. Im much younger than all my siblings, and there was so much that happened out of our hands that I made excuses, but my whole life, I’ve never quite felt “part of the family”.
As a child, I told myself we’d make up for lost time once I got older and we could talk as equals. Now, at 23, I see glimpses of the life I wished I’d have, but in the end, I’m always too much trouble to involve. I hear EVERYTHING from my father. I had to find out my niece was in a car accident from him; I had to find out my other niece had a miscarriage from him; I had to find out my oldest brother had a BRAIN TUMOR haphazardly on a phone call with my father, which he didn’t even know I was unaware of.
I’ve known for a while I’m the only one trying, but for the sake of my dreams, I’ve given every opportunity for them to let me in, but I just can’t do it anymore.
I have a psychiatric service dog who aids me with CPTSD. He is the single greatest thing to happen to me. Not only did he save my life from myself, but he has made life livable. He can tell when I’m panicking and he knows pressure therapy to help me through an attack. He stops me from hurting myself in meltdowns, sits with me until the only noise I can hear anymore is his snoring on my lap. He allows me to go grocery shopping by myself. He is my soulmate, and anyone who knows me knows how important he is to me.
My dating life isn’t thriving, so I took a shot in the dark and asked my niece if she minded if I brought my service dog as my plus one for her wedding at the end of this month. I have to fly across the country to go, so I will be bringing him anyway since I cannot fly alone. I figured it couldn’t hurt to see if he could not have to stay in the hotel all night. I do not technically need him for the event, since I’ll know every guest and I will be drinking pretty heavily to cope, but getting to spoil him with a bow-tie, dancing, and STEAK, sounded like the perfect reward for helping me on my flight. Several times, I emphasized that I understood it was an odd request and she could say no if she wanted.
She was EMPHATIC that he could come! She said even if I found a date, he could come! I was elated! For once, I felt seen, I felt cared about, I felt valued. And then I got a call from my dad. No one wanted to make things awkward, but the mother of the bride was NOT okay with a dog being at the venue. I explained that he is a trained service animal and will not impede the ceremony in anyway, and I’d of course remove him if he did. Still, he said they didn’t like it. I was so tired of hearing everyone else’s words through my father. He won’t be around forever and sooner or later, they will have to start talking to me
I had one request: let the bride tell me. When I asked her, she said yes, and until she told me she changed her mind, I was under the assumption he could go. Well, I never heard back. My dad kept dropping hints when i’d call him, but I told him what my expectations were. When I RSVP’d, I put my dog as my plus one on the response to let them know I wasn’t backing down this time. At this point, I didn’t even care if she said he couldn’t go. I just wanted to hear it from her.
The next morning, I woke up to an EMAIL from my father. Not even a text, a fucking email explaining that my niece didn’t want to be the bad guy, but my dog was NOT welcome at the wedding. He said he was sorry, but he could still come with me to the hotel if I wanted.
Something inside me broke, I think. I think I realized this is truly a helpless case. They are never going to respect me the way I crave them to. To this day, not one of our conversations has been started by them. I always initiate, and now, the one time I request a direct contact, I get an email.
Family means everything to me. Over the last few years, i’ve redefined what a family can be, and if right now, my family needs to be a very damaged orphan and their service animal, I’m grateful I have that much.
So, I’m going to the wedding, and then I’m never going to talk to any of them again.
And the sad part is, I didn’t even think they’re going to notice.
Update:
First, thank you to everyone for the kind words, and all the advice. It sincerely means so much that so many people care. I want to address all the questions about why I want to go to this wedding at all. There are plenty of practical reasons that I can name, but the truth is, I need to go for my own closure.
I have a strange relationship with death, and loss. My mother died when I was 5; my family split up right after. I’ve lost several caregivers to serious diseases, grieving their death as they lived. I’ve learned how to navigate MY grieving process. If I don’t go to this wedding, I will regret it. Not only is it my last chance to see my childhood family all together in one place, but if I don’t go, I show them they can bully me. I do not want to make a spectical of my trauma with them, but that does not mean I have to walk away with my tail between my knees.
I’m not scared of them. My relationship is non-existent, but I did see my siblings/cousins/neiecesandnephews fairly regularly. When I was a kid, they intimidated and bullied me into silence, but I’m not a child anymore. I lived with these people; I can manage one night, if for no other reason than to prove they cannot control me.
Thanks again for all the kind words. Happy to provide a pupdate if someone can tell me how to post pictures from the app?
RELEVANT COMMENTS
When told not to go to the wedding

I spent $700 on a plane ticket and $200 on a suit. Least I can do is go drink someone else’s liquor and dance my worries away. Besides. It feels like goodbye

&

The cherry on top is they are all very conservative Christians, and I will be going in a suit with my hair dyed green and makeup done to the nines, so this will be my biggest “fuck you, I’m here anyway” I can pull off. Truthfully, my father’s memory is starting to go as he gets older, so even if I did explain my feelings, he will end up sharing anyway, so I’ve made my peace with the fact that it will be a one-way-street because lord knows they’re not gonna ask what I’m up to.

When told to call the bride directly

The last 20 years of trauma will not be solved with one phone call. This was their last chance to prove to me they want me in their lives. It’s not about the dog. It’s the fact that all I asked is to be treated like a person and talked to directly, and they have proven to me they don’t care, so I’m leaving. I already did my job of reaching out to her and she said yes. Why is it my job to reach out and make sure she hasn’t changed her mind?

When told her father is an asshole and he is the one responsible for everything

THANK YOU! I have felt like the only one who cannot fathom how that conversation could be had over EMAIL?? It’s sadly not uncommon for them to communicate through him, and I always have the receipts after the fact when they’re no longer worried about the awkwardness. My brothers don’t even know where I work. I am building a career around my job. They couldn’t tell you what my relationship status is, and I’d be hard pressed to tell you if they knew my middle name to be honest. My father is not innocent, but they are responsible for their part in our relationship. I have stopped reaching out to them directly because I barely hear back, and it’s clear they don’t really care what I’m saying. I could honestly write a book on the road that’s led me to this choice, but who’s got the time in this economy?

Pupdate for Everyone Asking! Feb 6, 2024
He’s a 2.5 year old, Black and Tan Coonhound☺️
Dog tax
Update Feb 26, 2024
Original Story Here:
https://www.reddit.com/TrueOffMyChest/s/2MfJ98m6kP
POST-WEDDING UPDATE!
So, I went to the wedding. It went about how I expected it to go, though one can never be ready for a spontanious conga line. Sadly, there was no secret last minute invite, nor any secret plot of which the bride was unaware. She felt bad saying no, so she lied, and she didn’t want to tell me that, and she still didn’t, even at the wedding. No one really said much at all, in fact. The mother of the bride did not speak to me at all, my brother tiptoed around the subject until the end of the night. To his credit, he did apologize, “for all the dog stuff” as he said goodbye. Strangely, the apology didn’t make me feel much better.
There was no big confrontation either, mainly because no one cared to listen to me if I tried. As the reception began, part of me wondered how much I was going to miss the people, the environment, the vibe, really. Truthfully, I surprised myself with how ready I was to leave. Goodbye was short, and bittwersweet.
The venue was pretty and the alcohol was free, so I made the best of my night, but I got what I needed out of it, I think. Getting home tonight felt like a weight lifting off my shoulders. I know more than ever that I need to do this, and what I once saw as cutting my family in half, I can now see is clearing space for new family, one that cares.
Thank you for all your kind words, and all the support for my dog!
Arrogance is Bliss March 25, 2024
You don’t love me.
You love an idea of me you fabricated in your mind when I was a child.
I’m no longer a child.
I’m far from perfect, but I’m growing, I’m glowing, and I’m grieving the reality that none of you will ever know the person I become.
You call it love, but my scars disagree.
You hate my hair, my style, my beliefs—you hate me.
And the saddest part is, I don’t even think you know you do.
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

Context: I’m a 21f trying to live my life for Christ. I don’t use most social media platforms, not that there’s anything wrong if you do. but personally I’ve found that having them makes me not act or think in a way pleasing to God. I’ve had IG, Snapchat, FB, and TikTok accounts in the past. But as of late, Snapchat is basically dead, save for ppl that like to send/request explicit pics, which isn’t something I’m into considering I’m waiting until marriage. Additionally I’ll admit, I basically have a scrolling addiction. For reference, I will scroll on TikTok and Instagram for hours, not necessarily watching anything bad, it’s often funny vids or even Christian humor, but with Instagram specifically, im lurking on people’s pages to compare my life to theirs, thinking of how I’m better, and sometimes how their lives are better, neither being Christ like or good for my mental health. And I basically won’t live my life because I’m so invested in lives and decisions of others. Think of the whole ‘you are quick to point out the small splinter of wood in your neighbors eye but can’t seem to see the piece of wood in your own’ analogy. Anyways over the past year I’ve really been trying to break out of that because that isn’t Christ like at all and I need to get my time back so I can do things I need to do for my own life. I’ve tried to come back, thinking that just some time away will do the job but when I come back, I start doom scrolling again and then my screen time is basically up 80%. So going back to these platforms just isn’t possible for me, I lack self control, and better to cut the whole thing off than risk falling back into it. Additionally, I’ve really enjoyed the peace I’ve gotten from not being on IG, not feeling the stress of having to take the perfect photo for Instagram, post pictures often enough, to show that I’m doing as well as my peers, etc. Anyway, I truly think it’s much better for me to not have those social accounts.
Recently a guy approached me (21f) in the grocery store and asked for my Instagram. I don’t use Instagram anymore. I tell him that. So he asks me what socials do I have. And I suddenly realize I don’t have any and it never occurred to me when I deactivated my socials that this would be a problem when it came to meeting people. He ends up asking for my number and I was about to give it to him like I actually typed it in correctly but then I realized there’s a lot you can do with a phone number so I chickened out and changed the last two digits so obviously he can’t find me. I was wrong and feel bad about that and that’s another issue entirely. But back to the main point, I was trying to figure out if there are either alternative social media platforms I can use to chat with people so if I’m i meet someone but don’t want to give them something as personal as my phone number because we’re basically strangers instead or if I was being paranoid and you really can’t do any damage with just a cell number.

ok so my new boss is actually my exact type. he’s around my age, gorgeous blue eyes, hella fit. he’s so completely objectively attractive and it is driving me insane. he is so funny and ugh i actually can’t help myself. i applied for the job and noticed he was married so i was like eh leave it. but i catch him looking at me, complaining about his wife to me, brushing my leg under the desk, talking to me etc. he literally will reach over me and brush my chest and if it were anyone else i would be so pissed but i literally melt whenever we touch and idk what to do. i haven’t been this attracted to someone in a long time and it’s hard when all u hear are bad things about the wife. he doesn’t wear his wedding ring to work anymore. i don’t really act on anything and try to remain friendly even though there’s so much tension. anyways i need some serious help and advice.

Very silly, but regardless!!
I'm a bit nerdy (with glasses obviously), with a little extra weight, 6'1 183 cm tall, into computers and gaming, into movies and anime/manga too, as well as listening to music! I can also cook and bake really well, and am really passionate about learning and trying out new things!
I'm really bad at intros (being an introvert is hilariously funny), but if I somehow catch your eye hmu! I'll answer any questions you'd have about me and all!
I don't exactly care about appearances, and all that matters to me is that you're easy to talk to, and have an amazing personality!!
Although I would prefer it more if you'd be from Europe or around it, but I don't mind LDR in the slightest!
I also absolutely don't mind switching to discord to chat and all!

Context: I’m a trying to live my life for Christ. I don’t use most social media platforms, not that there’s anything wrong if you do. but personally I’ve found that having them makes me not act or think in a way pleasing to God. I’ve had IG, Snapchat, FB, and TikTok accounts in the past. But as of late, Snapchat is basically dead, save for ppl that like to send/request explicit pics, which isn’t something I’m into considering I’m waiting until marriage. Additionally I’ll admit, I basically have a scrolling addiction. For reference, I will scroll on TikTok and Instagram for hours, not necessarily watching anything bad, it’s often funny vids or even Christian humor, but with Instagram specifically, im lurking on people’s pages to compare my life to theirs, thinking of how I’m better, and sometimes how their lives are better, neither being Christ like or good for my mental health. And I basically won’t live my life because I’m so invested in lives and decisions of others. Think of the whole ‘you are quick to point out the small splinter of wood in your neighbors eye but can’t seem to see the piece of wood in your own’ analogy. Anyways over the past year I’ve really been trying to break out of that because that isn’t Christ like at all and I need to get my time back so I can do things I need to do for my own life. I’ve tried to come back, thinking that just some time away will do the job but when I come back, I start doom scrolling again and then my screen time is basically up 80%. So going back to these platforms just isn’t possible for me, I lack self control, and better to cut the whole thing off than risk falling back into it. Additionally, I’ve really enjoyed the peace I’ve gotten from not being on IG, not feeling the stress of having to take the perfect photo for Instagram, post pictures often enough, to show that I’m doing as well as my peers, etc. Anyway, I truly think it’s much better for me to not have those social accounts, so reactivating is basically off the table.
Recently a guy approached me (21f) in the grocery store and asked for my Instagram. I don’t use Instagram anymore. I tell him that. So he asks me what socials do I have. And I suddenly realize I don’t have any and it never occurred to me when I deactivated my socials that this would be a problem when it came to meeting people. He ends up asking for my number and I was about to give it to him like I actually typed it in correctly but then I realized there’s a lot you can do with a phone number so I chickened out and changed the last two digits so obviously he can’t find me. I was wrong and feel bad about that and that’s another issue entirely. But back to the main point, I was trying to figure out if there are either alternative social media platforms methods I can use to chat with people so if I’m i meet someone but don’t want to give them something as personal as my phone number because we’re basically strangers instead or if I was being paranoid and you really can’t do any damage with just a cell number.

This is kind of a long story and I feel like a lot of context is needed for it to make any sense at all. For starters, I went through a very hard breakup about 8 months ago, and I have been spending a lot of time getting to know myself again since the split. Especially since I was so hurt, I have been really nervous to go out with anybody because I want to avoid the possibility of being hurt again so soon. I was still going on dates but not letting myself get too attached to anybody.
(For the sake of anonymity, 40M will be referred to as Adam)
I met Adam about 6 years ago. He was one of my teachers during my grade 12 year, and we always got along really well. I was a very withdrawn person and would get nervous speaking out loud in front of people, but something about Adam made me feel super confident. I always joked about us flirting to my friends, but I obviously didn't take it very seriously, since I was only 17 and he was my teacher. I graduated and didn't really think about him much. Admittedly more than I thought about any of my other teachers, but still not a ton.
Fast forward to 2 months ago. Adam reached out to me on Facebook and we started talking. It started off very casual, he was asking me how I am and whether or not I went to post-secondary, ie, typical teacher questions. After a couple of days, however, I could tell the conversations between us were getting very flirtatious.
To be totally honest, I was really happy because I had nothing but good memories of Adam, so when he started finding sneaky ways to tell me how pretty I am I dove right into full on flirting. We started to make plans to meet up when he got back from a trip.
We talked all day, everyday up until we were going to meet, and as soon as we got together there was an instant connection and spark. It turns out Adam and I have had really similar upbringings, and we're super compatible emotionally and sexually. He had opened up and told me about how he regrets not having kids and that he worries if he doesn't have any soon his window of opportunity will close (It is a dream of mine to have babies and I have suffered multiple losses so I was so happy to hear that he was open to the idea) Things were going really well and then he sat me down for a talk.
Adam explained to me that he is married, he loves his wife, and he is worried about hurting my feelings down the road because he has no intentions of leaving his wife. He also told me that he thought I already knew (I probably did but that information was not important enough to a 17yr old me to remember). We discussed the possibility of not continuing to see eachother, but we both decided that this felt too special to not continue.
So that's what we did and now for the last month or so we have been getting together as often as possible, talking every single day and Adam has been buying me lots of gifts and food. He is also planning on taking me away for a weekend next month.
I was feeling happy and good about the situation, since I have been admittedly pretty lonely lately, and seeing someone who I already knew from the past has given me a nice feeling of familiarity while also giving me someone to tell jokes to and talk to when I'm having a hard day. But lately I can't stop thinking about Adams wife and how horrible it would be to be in that position. She has no idea that I exist and it seems like there is a lot of trust in their relationship, so I don't see her figuring it out any time in the near future.
I have thought so much about reaching out to Adams wife and coming clean, since if I were in her shoes I decided I would want to know asap, and it feels very not girls girl of me to be sleeping with somebody else's husband. At the same time, I understand that if I were to do that, Adam might never forgive me. Part of me feels as though Adam doesn't really care about me, or his wife since he seems so willing to hurt us both. I love spending time with Adam and I can't stop thinking about him. I'm worried if I stopped seeing him, I might have my heart broken again and I already barely survived my last heart break.
What should I do?

Hey! So, I’ve been posting these analysis compilations for each team in their respective subs, however, I am banned in the Patriots sub, so I figured I’d post this one (and only this one) here.
Round 1, Pick 3 - Drake Maye, QB, North Carolina:
NFL: Maye has prototypical dimensions and an exceptional arm. The comparisons made between Maye and Buffalo’s Josh Allen are real when it comes to his size, arm strength and leadership skills. Maye lacks the experience of other QBs in this draft, but if he can iron out some of his inconsistencies, he can be a superstar for the Patriots.
CBS Sports: B. He might need some time on the bench, but he has the talent to develop into a good starting quarterback in this league. He just needs to fine tune a few mechanical things. The Patriots had to get a quarterback.
ESPN: They didn't overthink it. In need of a potential franchise quarterback, and open to trading the pick if a big-time offer came their way, the Patriots landed a player who gives the organization the same type of hope that Drew Bledsoe did after being selected No. 1 overall in 1993. Now comes the important part of developing Maye with quality coaching, and ensuring he doesn't have too many voices in his ear.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Freaked out when a bird got into his house last summer and knocked over a lamp.
Round 2, Pick 37 - Ja’Lynn Polk, WR, Washington:
NFL: I wonder if the Patriots weren't hoping for Coleman to fall to them. Polk has some nice physical traits, possesses really nice body control to adjust to passes outside his frame and stepped up nicely when Jalen McMillan was hurt midseason last year. But I saw Polk's upside as lower, viewing him more as a third-round talent. He'll add size to New England's smaller WR room, though.
CBS Sports: B-. Complete wideout without stellar athletic traits who tracks it awesomely. Flashes of YAC wiggle and power. Fun, versatile piece to add to the offense that needs it. A tick early for him though.
ESPN: The Patriots had explored trading back into the bottom of the first round on Thursday night but couldn't strike a deal, according to sources. So they regrouped, traded down three spots in the second round (from 34 to 37) to improve 27 spots later in the draft (from 137 to 110), and then grabbed the player they probably would have picked at 34 in Polk. A Bill Belichick-type move from the new regime that will be judged, in part, by if they should have gone with WR Ladd McConkey (selected at 34) instead.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: He is currently binging all 14,000 episodes of Days of Our Lives.
Round 3, Pick 68 - Caedan Wallace, OT, Penn State:
NFL: Wallace is a thick-bodied right tackle who developed into an NFL prospect later in his six-year college career. With 40 college starts, he has experience, but it's almost all at that position, and Coleman was considered something of an underachiever earlier in his career. A reach for me.
CBS Sports: C-. Sizable framed OT with lumbering feet. Average-at-best athlete. Plays with good calmness and accuracy at second level and has quality power but overall athletic profile was severely threatened often in college. A concern for his NFL future. New England did need to add some OL depth. Worried about his upside.
ESPN: The Patriots' top need areas entering the draft were QB, WR and OT, and Wallace caps off the 1-2-3 approach in filling them. He was mostly a right tackle in college, but Wolf said the team believes Wallace has the athletic ability to move to the left side. First-year offensive line coach Scott Peters comes from the Browns and his presence ties to Wallace, who at the least will be counted upon to be a top backup as a rookie.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: I’m just saying, if you know, you know.
Round 4, Pick 103 - Layden Robinson, OG, Texas A&M:
NFL: It's funny, if you hadn't told me Eliot Wolf was running the Patriots' draft room, I might have just assumed it was business as usual in Foxboro, with Bill Belichick overseeing things. Robinson, like Day 2 picks Ja'Lynn Polk and Caedan Wallace, were semi-value reaches. Robinson is a hard-nosed guard-only who improves the depth up front, but was it a massive need?
CBS Sports: B+. Mashing guard who plays more athletically than his workout. Tremendous burst off the snap on a routine basis. Could add more strength at the next level. Serious length but hands are late often. Nastiness is there for the run and pass protection. Upside blocker.
ESPN: With starting left guard Cole Strange attempting to return from a late-season injury that could affect his availability early this year, the Patriots are loading up on the offensive line to give themselves as many options as possible. Robinson has been a pure right guard, where 2023 fourth-round pick Sidy Sow is the projected starter. The team also has 2023 fifth-rounder Atonio Mafi, so Robinson joins the young pipeline up front. One scouting report referred to him as an "absolute freight train in the running game," which seems to reflect the style of lineman the team is looking for under the new coaching staff.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: You don’t stop the rock It to the bang-bang boogie, say up jump the boogie.
Round 4, Pick 110 - Javon Baker, WR, UCF:
NFL: I figured the Patriots would double up at receiver, and there was some talk of Baker being a Day 2 pick. I didn't love all of his tape, but he clearly features big-play prowess. UCF didn't fully unleash his talent, but Baker also needs to hone the details of his craft before he can be in a featured role.
CBS Sports: A+. This is a future No. 1 wideout. While not a burner, he plays faster and has the complete skill set. Releases at the line are good, flexibility to get open at intermediate level, YAC prowess, and especially rebounding skills are high-end.
ESPN: Baker is a big play waiting to happen, as evidenced by his five catches of 50-plus yards last season. So after the Patriots selected Ja’Lynn Polk in the second round, they doubled down with Baker -- which reflects how director of scouting Eliot Wolf is decisively addressing one of the team's top deficiencies. Wolf grew up in the Packers' system, and they have had recent success taking a similar approach at WR and TE. If there is a knock on Baker, it's that he has 14 drops over the past two seasons.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: His favorite movie of all time is Scream.
Round 6, Pick 180 - Marcellas Dial, CB, South Carolina:
NFL: Dial has decent length and has gotten his hands on a lot of passes the past three years, and he has a chance to make it as a jack of all trades in the secondary, with experience at multiple spots.
CBS Sports: A-. This is tremendous value. Zone awareness for days. Didn’t see the football thrown in his direction much. Outstanding ball skills when it does arrive. Doesn’t miss many tackles either. Hard to find a clear flaw to his game.
ESPN: Christian Gonzalez (2023 first-round pick), veteran Jonathan Jones and third-year player Marcus Jones are at the top of the CB depth chart, followed by a group of younger players whom Dial (6-0, 190) will compete against for a roster spot. That group includes Alex Austin, Marco Wilson, Shaun Wade, Isaiah Bolden and Azizi Hearn. As is often the case at this point in the draft, contributions on special teams figure to be a notable factor if Dial ultimately breaks through. Dial said he visited the Patriots before the draft (among the three teams he traveled to see) and had a feeling he would land with them.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: If you send the right mod $10,000 they will sell you the sub.
Round 6, Pick 193 - Joe Milton III, QB, Tennessee:
NFL: Milton's bazooka arm figured to make him a late-round flier, but I didn't have him landing in New England after the Patriots took Drake Maye with the third overall pick. Some teams have toyed with the idea of turning Milton into a Logan Thomas-like TE conversion.
CBS Sports: C+. Will immediately have one of the strongest arms in the NFL. Grew a lot as a passer after transfer to Tennessee. Accuracy is very hit or miss and he’s an average athlete. Coverage-reading needs to improve. Big frame.
ESPN: After taking Drake Maye No. 3 overall, and then Milton, this marks just the second time in team history that two QBs were selected in the same draft (1983 with Tony Eason and Tom Ramsey). Milton's physical traits stand out -- he's 6-foot-5 and 246 pounds with a powerful arm -- and some believe he could transition to tight end in the NFL. When looking at Milton through the QB-specific lens, the Patriots obviously view Maye as their hopeful long-term option, with veteran Jacoby Brissett the current projected starter until Maye is ready. They would still be looking to carry a No. 3 option. Bailey Zappe (2022 fourth-round pick) and second-year player Nathan Rourke are also on the depth chart, and their spots on the roster could be in jeopardy if the Patriots view Milton as the ideal developmental option.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Totally cried when he read The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane.
Round 7, Pick 231 - Jaheim Bell, TE, Florida State:
NFL: Bell was a versatile enough athlete that he played running back at South Carolina because of injuries, but his best chance to make it in the league is as a "move" tight end with his smaller frame.
CBS Sports: A+. H-back type with explosive YAC traits. Cutting skill and natural ability to absorb contact and keep the legs churning. Won’t be a natural separator but when schemed open he can be a fun asset in the New England offense.
ESPN: Coach Jerod Mayo said by this point of the draft, the Patriots were selecting the best player regardless of need. The 6-foot-2, 242-pound Bell played more than 40% of his snaps last season in the slot, so he's an H-back-type option more than an inline TE. The Patriots have veteran Hunter Henry atop their depth chart, with top backups Austin Hooper and Mitchell Wilcox on one-year contracts, so Bell gives them a developmental option with the future in mind. If he breaks through, he could be a safety valve for a young quarterback on safer, underneath routes. His 897 yards after the catch since 2021 rank second among FBS tight ends after Brock Bowers.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Consults the farmers almanac every day about the weather.

My husband(28M) and I(28F) have been together almost 12 years, married 8. We met and began dating senior year of high school. Our friends have often said we are relationship goals. Sure we’ve had a bump or 2 but nothing that couldn’t be resolved with a constructive conversation.
Important to know before I get to the point of the post that before I ever met my husband I dated Jay who was 17/18, while I at the time was 15/16. We only dated about a year but our relationship really messed me up as he was all but physically abusive. Our relationship ended when Jay left and traveled halfway across the country for someone he met in an online game(invu)that he had openly been(at the very least) emotionally cheating with. He had gone as far as showing me their texts, and gaslighting me under the guise of them just role playing their characters when I got upset over him calling her by the same pet name he called me (ex. Baby, sweetheart, etc). I was 16 and naïve so I believed him. He left before dawn one morning and didn’t bother to call to break up with me until he was already out of state.
My husband and I met about 8 months later. I told him early on about what happened with Jay and that I was pretty messed up from it. He took it in stride and has been very supportive of me as I have been slowly trying to heal and undo the trauma Jay left me with.
In recent years I’d been doing the best I ever had and truthfully my relationship with Jay was starting to feel like a distant memory. I was by no means 100% healed but I was beginning to feel like I could close the chapter, that is until my husband met kat(26). He and kat met almost 2 years ago when they both joined an online d&d campaign his best friend ran. They weren’t particularly close friends until 8 months when they started the new campaign. Admittedly this is when it began bothering me because until this point all his online friends were male, kat was the first female.
I’ve tried to push past my feelings and remind myself that my husband isn’t Jay and he would never hurt me like that, but some things he’s done/said have made it difficult like when he made a character to play specifically with her in a game they both like, bought her a $60 game so they could play together, and has admitted if she didn’t live so far away that he would build her a new pc as a gift (like he did with his best friend). We have talked multiple times about it all and how I feel. He seemed to understand and has reassured me dozens of times that he isn’t going anywhere and that he would never cheat on me.
Now I’m not too sure of anything. Last Saturday they had a d&d session, and after session my husband all but dragged me to his office because he wanted to show me the text conversation he and kat had during session. It started out normal until kat commented that she felt like she had the whole season of [insert season] in her mouth because of the hard candy she’d been eating all session. The following exchange happened:
Husband- [insert season] is my last name, you said you had the whole season in your mouth. Kat- for shame! I’m telling [littlegamerkitten]. Husband- It’s her last name too. Kat- then give me the seasons.
I fully admit I shut down and locked myself in my office for a few hours. All the insecurities I had been pushing down were just flooding my brain, and I didn’t want to be so emotionally charged when we finally talked. When we did talk he apologized, and said he wasn’t trying to hurt me, he was just trying to be funny. He admitted he should have stopped and thought about it before making the joke and reassured me that there was nothing going on between him and kat and that he’s not going to leave me.
We have been ok since then. But I find myself feeling like maybe I over reacted. Now that I’ve had time to reflect on it the joke was kinda funny but definitely not the most appropriate. I’m just having a hard time trusting my judgment.

Out of the whole series, I think there has been 1 part that just really irked me and I didn't understand. When they do the caption contest, was I the only one who thought every single person's answer was so dumb except for Gabe's? I thought his was funny and made sense.
Can someone tell me why did Oscar say it was tasteless?