For valid reasons… this happened 3 days before surgery date.
I got a 360 TT last December and, despite the rough recovery, I felt ready to proceed with the upper body lift this May.
My surgeon requires blood work and bleeding tests before each procedure and, turns out, I’m ANEMIC! Mildly anemic (I was also kinda asymptomatic, that’s why I didn’t notice). I have done blood tests before my 360 TT and my blood count was good, so I guess the cause of the low blood count is the blood loss during my first procedure, even though I took iron supplements religiously afterwards (and still do) but not enough I guess.
Anyway, my upper body lift surgery will be postponed until I increase my hemoglobin levels and iron stores. I advise anyone that got surgery lately to also check their blood count and make sure they’re good. I think the blood loss during surgery also contributed to my rough recovery, so there’s that.
Not gonna lie, I’m quite devastated about having to postpone it, but I will take this time as an opportunity to focus on eating better and nourishing my body. I will turn into a vampire if I have to. PM me if you have any extra blood🧛‍♀️

i had a pretty bad and long flare that the doctors managed to help with and get in remission, but the thing is while it's definitely better now (no blood), i still have urgency, cramps and rectal pain. honestly was pretty shocked when they told me i'm in remission cause it doesn't really feel like it.

So I might be late making this but I haven't seen any other threads detailing the predictions that have come true in "euphoria" yet. Kendrick is looking like an honest-to-God prophet right now.

1. "Them superpowers getting neutralised"

By the end of this, your charting powers will neutralised. Kendrick has outperformed Drake on the charts (3 times) with "euphoria", "Like That" and "Not Like Us".

1. "The famous actor we once knew is looking paranoid and now spiralling"

Drake has to look over his shoulder due to mole allegations, and in "The Heart Pt. 6" he's spiralling into conspiracy theories and crazy, disprovable accusations.

1. "Fabricating stories on the family front cause you heard Mr Morale"

On "Family Matters", Drake accuses Kendrick of beating his fiancée, and accuses Whitney of having a child with Dave Free. On "The Heart Pt. 6", Drake claims Kendrick was molested by a family member.

1. "But don't tell no lie about me, and I won't tell truths about you"

Before Drake's claims on Family Matters, Kendrick doesn't say anything about Drake that isn't already public record. He only reveals new allegations once Drake has made claims about his life.

1. "I'll park his son"

Verse 1 of "meet the grahams" is Kendrick "parking" Adonis to discuss his father.

1. "Somebody had told me that you got a ring"

Initially, this appeared to be about 2Pac's ring that Drake bought, but after "meet the grahams" it seems likely that it was a double-entendre referring to Drake's "pedophile ring."

1. "I pray they my real friends, if not, I'm YNW Melly"

Kendrick is threatening to kill Drake, like YNW Melly (allegedly) did. He goes on to say multiple times that he actively wants Drake to die on "meet the grahams".

1. "We hate the bitches you fuck, cause they confuse themselves with real women"

This initially seemed like an attack on Drake sleeping with "fake" women, such as influencers and Instagram models. Now it seems like that was a hint at him sleeping with underage girls.

1. "You gon' make a n***a bring back Puff"

This initially seemed like he was threatening to bring P. Diddy back to slap Drake again, like he allegedly did in Miami. A new interpretation could be that he's once again hinting at the fact that he can bring up sex crime allegations, like Diddy.

1. "Yeah my first one like my last one, it's a classic, you don't have one"

Is he talking about albums? Probably. But if I stretch a bit: his first "one" in this diss is "Like That", a record that went #1 and will likely be a future classic, and his last "one" is "Not Like Us", which also went #1 and broke all sorts of records on the way.

1. "Back to Back, I like that record. Imma get back to that for the record."

Kendrick went back to back twice in this beef. First with "euphoria" and "6:16 in LA", then with "meet the grahams" and "Not Like Us".

1. "Talk about me and my family, crodie? Someone gon' bleed in your family, crodie"

After "Family Matters" (where Drake made allegations about Kendrick's family), "meet the grahams" and "Not Like Us", a shooting happened in front of Drake's house, resulting in a security guard being badly injured.

1. "If you take it there, I'm taking it further. Psst! That's something you don't wanna do"

Obvious, but worth mentioning: if Drake takes it to the family, Kendrick will go further. Considering the allegations on "meet the grahams" and "Not Like Us", I'd call this one fulfilled.
If you have others, let me know!

CHAPTER 9 – ENTROPY
DATE: MARCH 10th, 7 A.U. (AFTER UNIFICATION) LOCATION: SOL SYSTEM, ABOARD UTRN INDOMITABLE WILL
CAPTAIN HENRY O’TOOLE
"Ah, there you are Commander. Your message said there was something you wanted to talk with me about?" Henry asked as his executive officer approached the system map.
“Aye Captain, now's a good a time as any. As you know, the rate of disciplinary incidents has more than tripled in the last two weeks. We've had six fistfights, one near strangling, a few dozen counts of sexual harassment amongst different parties, and a few more incidents of a nature that I would rather not get into for fear of derailing the point of this conversation. I need additional resources to allocate towards ship internal security. With your permission, I'd like to borrow some of our more trusted marines to help the MA's out on their off shifts.” Commander Alvarez asked.
“Yeah, of course, take what you need to nip this in the bud. I can't say I'm entirely surprised; we expected a certain amount of this with the stresses of FTL travel. With everyone cooped up like this, maybe we should brainstorm some new outlets for the crew. Were there any specific incidents I need to get involved with?” Henry replied as he looked up from the list of updates and reports on his own console.
“No, I have it covered. It's just the regs state I need to ask permission to use marines for internal security matters.” The Commander waved it off.
“Excellent, continue to keep me in the loop then. Can I ask you a question?” Henry took the opportunity to ask something that had been bothering him.
“You just did. Hah! Just kidding, put the axe away boy! Now what would you like to know?” He said with a twinkle in his eye.
“I've seen your file, well, the parts that weren’t redacted anyway. If anything, I should be taking your orders! I mean, you're the Space Wolf! Nobody came even close to the number of ships captured or destroyed than you in the early days of the battle for the belt. Why would they want me to be captain when they had someone like you coming along the whole time? Why aren't you a captain anymore? By all right this should be your command, not mine.” Henry asked, after taking one last look around to verify they were still alone around the system map.
Commander Alvarez seemed stunned for a moment before he settled into a more pensive look.
“Listen, son, you're all full of the vigor and high passions of youth. By that I mean you've got a certain fire and aggression in you, yet I've seen you generally keep it balanced by wit and wisdom. You are a perfect match for the job, even if you could use some more real world experience. With some guidance, you'll do just fine, if you can keep strict standards for yourself and crew and a cool head when things get tough."
"I appreciate that, and I will definitely lean on your experience whenever possible. However, you didn't really answer my question... Why aren't you a captain anymore?"
"I... got a lot of damn good men and women killed in an impossible situation when we lost the Michigan-II, and I never truly got over it. No amount of medals, captured enemy ships, or the fact that I've saved many more lives than I lost can make up for that. I finally found peace with that, but that peace required that I relieve myself of any chance of future command. My legacy, for better or worse, is set in stone. Joining this expedition gives me another chance at adjusting the scales without breaking my former vows, even if the only people who will ever know it are here on the voyage with us.”
“So, you claim you have no aims or desires for leadership, but here you are a mere heartbeat away from it.” Henry said, carefully studying his executive officer's every reaction.
“My time for glory is mostly gone, yours is at your feet before you. To the world, I am retired in comfort and isolation. In reality you have me here to help make your will law. You can relax. I already turned down command of this expedition. I was plan A, why do you think they had to scramble to find you? I will take command of this mission only if you are incapable of doing so yourself, Sir. In the meantime, let my experience and whatever wisdom I can offer guide you.”
An emergency alert snapped both of their attention out of their conversation. "There's a fire in one of the officer's cabins?!" Henry’s pulse quickened as he referenced the map to find which one.
“Fuck, it started in Chantal’s room!” Henry said, horrified.
“I've got the CIC under control. Go on and get her out of there, I'll send the cavalry."
“Thank you, Commander.” Henry called back over his shoulder as he rushed for the quick lift.
The officer cabins were the in the very next deck overhead, so he was able to arrive quickly and break into a sprint. The ship shifted as it dodged some antimatter, causing Henry to slip and scramble back to his feet. As he rounded the corner he saw her door was closed and the keypad powered was off. He could hear thumps and muffled screaming from within the room.
"HANG ON CHANTAL, I'M COMING!" Henry shouted in the hope that she could hear him as he pried at the manual override panel.
Two modified Paladin exo-combat armor suits rounded the corner seconds later with a hospitalman trailing behind pushing a medical cart.
"WE'LL TAKE IT FROM HERE, SIR." A speaker-amplified voice spoke from behind him.
One of the Paladin suits accessed the manual control override and forced the door open enough for the other suit to reach in and pry it the rest of the way open as smoke plumed into the corridor. The second suit charged into the room with its flood lights on as a water cannon mounted on the right wrist sprayed flame retardant from a pack on its back. The first suit abandoned the door control and entered, emerging moments later with Chantal awake and coughing from inside the darkened door frame. She was quickly ushered into cleaner air, set gently down, wrapped in a blanket, and was quickly attended to by a hospitalman who began to check her vitals.
Relief flooded Henry’s mind as his adrenaline surge broke against the wall of worry he had built up during his mad dash from the CIC.
“Baby you came for me! I thought I was going to die in there." She pulled him into a tight embrace as she wept in cathartic release.
"Of course I did! I couldn't stand to lose you, especially not over something like this. So, what the hell happened in there?"
"Well you know me, I was all burning the midnight oil and then I smelled smoke! Then there were some sparks, the outlet pops then whoosh! My computer station and my desk are all ablaze along with half my notes, then the damned door wouldn't work! I had to drop to the floor under the smoke and pound on the door in hopes that someone would hear me. God, it was horrible... I don't think I've ever been so scared in my life." She replied with a deep shudder.
"You're safe now, it's going to be alright."
"I know, but what about my work?" She replied with a forlorn look back at her smoke damaged room.
"What about your work?"
"As you know, I lost a ton of it just now, but what’s worse is I don't even have the ability to recover them! Remember how I lost my backup drive last week? Like, I know I packed it and it is not here anywhere! It’s like some sick cosmic joke on me or something. Sorry! Gotta keep it positive, girl! I get to rethink my last few weeks’ worth of work from scratch... that was almost positive! I probably have most of this recoverable from email sent box backups. Fuck, what do you do if there's no good silver lining?” Chantal bemoaned.
Henry couldn’t help himself but laugh for a second, while his girlfriend stared at him, waiting for a response.
“I’m sorry, is this funny to you or something?”
“No, no of course not. This might be one of those times where the only silver lining is that you're alive. Plus, if anyone can remember and rebuild their notes, you can." Henry smiled down at her.
“Fine, fine, at least I am alive. I was only breathing smoke for a few seconds after all.” She said, rolling her eyes. “Thank you for rushing down here right away anyway, it means a lot. You're amazing, you know.”
Henry smiled, slightly uncomfortable for a moment, so he changed the subject.
“I do my best... Anyway, it seems like these electrical issues seem to be getting worse instead of better. Whatever patch these clowns have slapped on my ship to get her to pass inspection is clearly coming undone. What do you think is going on here?” Henry asked in mild exasperation.
“Honestly, I can’t tell you without digging into the systems myself, which I would rather avoid. My plate is full enough as it is right now, especially having to reproduce so much of my own work now. This ship has kilometers of power cables running throughout it, after all, and you have an entire loyal, capable team down there in electrical, so it should only be a matter of time before they sort it out for you. Let them do their jobs without harassing them too much, please?”
Henry felt a little irked at her for not giving him credit to know not to go overboard, but he stowed it, seeing as she ultimately was right.
“The crew has been under a lot of stress, too, between the technical issues with the lights going out, losing power to workstations, or the constant antimatter threat. More than a few people have tried to convince me to turn us around and return to S33 for a more in-depth refit and repair cycle before we try the mission again. So far, everyone has accepted the fact that we are continuing the mission without much argument, but I fear what may happen if these issues are seen as getting worse. Our orders are clear, though, we must continue the journey.” Henry said, uncomfortable with the implications, even if he didn't dare voice it.
“You should get on the Q-Comm to report the fire to S33. Maybe they will order us back to base after this.” She offered, looking for a solution to an impossible problem.
“Good idea, at least the Q-Comm is still working. It’s incredible to me those particles maintained their entanglement once we passed through the baryonic barrier. That alone has been a huge morale boost, being able to contact home base with no time lag.” Henry replied.
“It’s incredible to you because you only have a basic grasp of the science, hon. But that’s alright, very few people truly understand it. That’s in part what you have me here for anyway. Einstein called the effect spooky action from a distance; I always liked that line.”
Henry ran his fingers through his hair and looked at Chantal, with a shake of his head and a smile.
“Listen, Henry, I just had a crazy stressful experience and I need to unwind. Plus, I haven’t slept in almost a day, so I am bone tired. Let’s go to bed, huh? What do you say doc, am I clear to go?” Chantal asked.
The hospitalman closed her eyes and shook her head before responding. "Yes, you are cleared to rest, and only to rest, do you understand me?"
Chantal mouthed a thank you before she took Henry by the hand and led him off to the captain’s quarters. Henry felt no desire to fight it, nor flaw with her reasoning. Sleep sounded good, really good. Plus, he was about an hour from the start of his sleep shift anyway, and Alvarez had the CIC well covered. The lights flickered again, but Henry very purposefully ignored it.
“Hey, since we have a little time and we are both a little wound up, Why don’t we take a shower together real quick?” She said with genuine enthusiasm and a wink.
“Madam, I like the way you think.” The couple raced just a bit faster than regulations would have liked, and arrived at his door in record speed.
Inside the room they fell upon each other in great passion and need, stripping each other out of their BDU’s and underclothes. Henry tossed a giggling Chantal onto the bed, and proceeded to kiss her neck and nibble on her ear causing her to purr in anticipation before he moved down her chest, past her navel, and then eagerly began to move his kisses in between her thighs.
“Hah…. I haven’t showered. Are you sure? Oooookay! I think…. Hah…. Okay.” She said breathlessly as Henry began to work his tongue until she began to shiver and squirm before she cried out as she melted in his mouth.
“Enough, please, I can’t take it anymore! Just fuck me already!” Chantal pulled herself together enough to beg for it. Henry stood rigid and ready and set himself to granting her request, first slowly, and then with a growing intensity. She once more began to squirm as he paid close attention to her hip’s cues, knowing very well by now what she liked.
As she climaxed again, Henry lifted her from the bed and pushed her up against the wall, and then bent her over his desk for a bit before he could take it no longer and they finished together.
“Holy shit… my legs aren’t gonna work for a bit after that one. Help me up?” Chantal said in between shallow breaths.
“Yes, ma’am. It would be my pleasure.” Henry said as he helped her to her feet and into the shower, staying in longer than was strictly necessary.
Henry left the steam first, once more thankful that his cabin included its own small bathroom, rather than a communal one. Being captain had its perks, after all. He grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his waist, then handed another to Chantal who gratefully accepted it before it dropped to the ground as she stared straight past him.
“Henry!" She squeaked as she pointed past him.
"What?" Henry asked, confused.
"Henry, someone was in here!”
On their bathroom mirror, wiped from the steam were the words TURN BACK.
Henry's blood ran cold and his adrenaline spiked him into overdrive. He waved Chantal back into the shower and put his finger to his lips. She nodded then wrapped herself in her retrieved towel and dropped to the shower floor with her arms wrapped around her knees, whimpering slightly. Henry moved silently along the wall, watching the visible half of his room for any movement. He then burst round the door frame, only to find everything perfectly, precisely as they had left it. The shock of finding nothing collided with the spike of his adrenaline surge, which only fed his growing unease.
“There’s nobody here!” Henry called out after checking the closet, the only other place someone could have hidden.
“Did you lock the door?” Chantal asked, her mind already working on the mystery.
“I set the security protocol to auto lock every time it closes.”
“Paul. We need to talk to Paul.” Chantal said, squeezing her BDU’s up over her hips with a few hops. Henry pulled on his undershirt before tossing over her bra.
“Why would we want to bring that weasel into this?” Henry asked, incredulous at to how he could possibly help.
“Because he has access to the surveillance tapes, why else?”
Henry stared at Chantal, brimming with rage, trying his hardest to keep it isolated to Paul over the invasion of his privacy.
“Did you just say surveillance tapes!?!” Henry asked in an icy tone. “That does it, I’m going to strangle him.” Henry said, moving with a purpose toward the door.
“Stop. Turn around and give me a kiss. I already disabled the video cameras, at least all the ones I could find. He has audio at best, even that I doubt. What he does have that I want is the data from the motion sensor that he had installed just in case you found the more obvious bugs. Unfortunately, I sabotaged its effectiveness by blocking the sensor with dense foam, but there might be enough of something to give us a clue."
“How in the hell do you know about all of this anyway, and why the hell didn’t you tell me?!” Henry roared.
“This entire enterprise is run by an intelligence agency; how can you not have seen that one coming a mile away? I have gotten very good at catching bugs over the years. Just because I expect the invasion of privacy to be happening, doesn’t mean I have to make it easy on them. Just be happy I already took care of the issue, alright?” She replied firmly while staring him in the eyes with raised eyebrows.
“You’re incredible, I love you.” Henry blurted out before he could catch himself. Chantal beamed and tackled him to the bed sitting on his lap.
“What took you so long? Never mind, don’t answer that. I love you too, man have I wanted to say that one for a while now.”
“You know these things aren’t easy for me. I had to be sure, I also didn’t want to mess anything up. We need to be able to work together even if we had turned out to be a bad couple.” Henry admitted, Chantal made an show as she thought it over, but she then smiled and helped Henry to his feet.
“Alright, my captain. You speak great wisdom. While I have certainly felt, and thoroughly enjoyed, the depths of your passion, it is really nice to hear about it too. I do think it makes it all the better that you rule said passion with reason. It’s just one of the many things I love about you.” She said, laying her hand over his heart.
Henry took her other hand and kissed it before replying. “I think above all, I wanted to make sure that I didn’t take you for granted, nor suffer the same in reverse. A wise woman once gave me some great advice there that I have taken to heart.”
“Okay, Romeo, maybe you have a better handle on these things than you think. Now… Let’s go interrogate Paul.” Chantal had a fire in her eyes that Henry was loving very much at that moment.
“I have wanted to turn the screws on that spook for a while now.” Henry smiled as he spoke, and he opened up the connection to the ship’s intranet through his neural implant to send a message.
MEET ME IN YOUR QUARTERS IN 5 MINUTES FOR A DISCUSSION OF CRITICAL IMPORTANCE – CPT. O'TOOLE
“That ought to get him there and alone.” Henry smirked. “Let’s go.”
Together, they made their way to Paul’s equivalent-sized quarters, which he had somehow secured for himself in the ship design to help facilitate his role as the official thorn in Henry’s paw. I guess being the captain’s handler has its perks as well. Henry’s eye twitched at the corner.
After making them wait far too long, Paul opened the door and gesturing them inside. The door closed and Paul turned towards them, narrowing his eyes, studying them both.
“Is this about the fire?” Paul asked before Henry punched the weasel right in the diaphragm, forcing him to gasp for air. The look of shock on his face as he bent forwards was priceless.
“What the fuck, Henry!?” Paul managed to choke out after a minute between gasps.
“Relax, I didn’t do any permanent damage, yet.” Henry said, Paul for just a second showed actual fear in his eyes before he sneered in defiance. “Oh? That got your attention, did it? Why were you spying on me?” Henry growled.
Paul closed his eyes, dropped his head, and began to laugh before Henry grabbed him by the throat and slammed him into the wall. Foolishly, Paul even then kept laughing amidst the gasping. So Henry squeezed until Paul started slapping his arm, looking genuine fear once more growing across his face.
“Orders… I was following orders!” Paul managed to say amidst gasps and coughs.
“I thought it might be something like that. You're going to open up those files, now, and you're going to show me everything.” Henry said, dropping him to his feet at last.
“Fucking hell, Henry, I thought you of all people would have anticipated this was going to be the case. Do you think the people who made this all possible would simply let you fly around the most dangerous, advanced warship in human history without some insurance?”
“Don’t try and weasel out of your own personal culpability here. You may also want to think back to other people who were “only following orders” while performing acts they knew were wrong before you wave that line around like some get out of jail free card.” The fact that he had nothing to say spoke volumes.
“You should have told me, Paul.” Henry growled.
“That defeats the purpose! Plus, your girlfriend sabotaged them all before we ever left S33 anyway, and once more after! That type of tech doesn’t just grow on trees you know, and I don’t have an unlimited supply. You should be thanking me for covering for her and reporting back like things are normal!” Paul shouted in indignation.
“This is pointless, show me the files from around fifteen minutes ago, motion trackers, thermals, anything you have that's not blocked or sabotaged.” Henry commanded. Paul’s eyes narrowed, but after a long moment he huffed and closed his eyes.
Paul then sat down at his station and fired it up.
“Like I said, I've got practically nothing. No video, muffled audio and readings from what I assume to be a faulty motion sensor, that’s it. What are we looking for?”
“Chantal and I were, well, together. After we got out of the shower we saw that someone had written turn back in the condensation on the bathroom mirror. Only problem? My door auto locks when closed and only opens for my biometrics. That is why all of this even came up in the first place.”
“Motherfucker. That's a whole heap of bad news.” Paul said. Henry merely nodded, paying rather more attention to the screen to see if he could catch Paul in a lie about the extent of the spying.
“There’s nothing. No disturbances in the air that would even remotely resemble human movement between you two getting in the shower and you charging into your bedroom. With the noise of the shower and the distance to the microphone, there is nothing I can discern that is anomalous. You can see it all right here for yourself.”
Henry found himself even more confused and alarmed than before.
“How is that possible? Look again, run through some filters or something. There must be some evidence somewhere!”
“Alright, relax, I will get to work on this and get you a report by the end of C shift. In the meantime, you look like a mess. Get some sleep man! I can take care of it from here. Oh, and I want you to remember that I forgave you quite magnanimously for that little episode back there where you attacked me.” Henry and Chantal gave each other a look as Paul spoke.
“Wasn’t gonna apologize anyway, you had it coming. I’m going to hit the rack. I expect that report to be detailed and ready when I get up.” Henry took Chantal by the hand, and they left together, not waiting for a response.
“What a snake. Did you see him in there? Zero guilt or recognition whatsoever about spying like that. It just makes my skin crawl. Gives me bad memories.” Chantal said, turning pensive and quiet.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Henry asked, seeing that there was something clearly bothering her.
“I… had an uncle that lived with us from time to time and he would spy on me when I was dressing, try and sneak looks in the shower, stuff like that. Never touched me or anyone else that I know of, thank god, but man did it screw me up a bit still. Played havoc with my sense of security and even my sanity, never being quite sure it was real or all in my head. I wish I had said something, but I was afraid everyone would think I was overreacting or imagining it. I saw it in his eyes though, that look of... predatory lust. At least I didn't see anything like that in Paul's eyes. To this day it makes my skin crawl.”
“Good God, I can see how alone you must have felt in the middle of all that.” He squeezed her hand, she smiled up at him.
“Yeah, that was one of the hardest parts. I don’t think Paul is some raging pervert or anything, but it concerns me how normalized it was to him. Even if he isn’t being a creep with it, as if we can take his claims to be covering for me at face value. There is still no way I am going to let him have easy access to intimate videos of us, if I can possibly help it.” Chantal said before adding, “I’ll be all right, don’t worry about me. Let’s just get some sleep.”
Henry put his palm against the biometric scanner outside his room and the door slid open for them. They definitely needed some sleep after the emotional roller coaster of the past few hours, and the irresistible warm embrace of his bed called for him. The Q-Comm report could wait until he woke, he decided.
Better to have the electrical inspection ordered up, too.
I WANT A FULL REPORT AND INSPECTION PERFORMED ON THE ELECTRICAL FIRE IN CHANTAL’S ROOM BY THE START OF A SHIFT. – CAPT. O'TOOLE
Good enough. Henry thought as he sent the message. Now he could sleep. The chief could handle it from there.
MEANWHILE…
DATE : MARCH 10th, 7 A.U. LOCATION: SOL SYSTEM, ABOARD UTRN INDOMITABLE WILL
FIREMAN APPRENTICE SARAH CALLAHAN
It'll be back again tonight...
Sarah’s haunted thoughts repeated like a mantra. She had to be ready, but how? Her skin crawled and itched, the long sleeves of her BDU’s prevented her from being able to do anything about the painful sensation from the inflamed scratches they hid. She blearily rubbed at her sunken eyes, and she drained the rest of her coffee. All the numbers on the screen had started bleeding in together and her eyes hurt horribly, with the throbbing pain in her abdomen only compounding her misery.
“My god, Sarah, you look a wreck, hon. How have you been sleeping?” Yvonne, her shift partner asked, with concern in her voice.
“I have a monster tension headache, I just hope the meds kick in soon. Can you check my math? I need to get out of these white lights for a few minutes. Close my eyes for a bit, something, anything. I've been having nightmares again.” Sarah felt good, being able to admit it, and Yvonne had long since proven her friendship, so it was easier to actually speak.
“Yeah, no prob. As soon as I am done here I will check your readings and we can get out of here. Do you mean nightmares from the invasion?” Yvonne asked, carefully picking her words and tone.
“Kind of the same general themes, but different. Everything is going wrong, like the worst possible outcomes of my worst nightmares are all combining together. Like, it feels actively malicious, I don't know, its hard to explain...” Sarah said, bleakly.
“That’s hard, I am sorry. You need a shower, and an uninterrupted nap. Sleep deprivation plays all kinds of hell on the body and mind. I had a friend who went through an insomniac phase so extreme he would go days without sleeping. Wound up in the hospital after trying to drive to work while hallucinating his dead fiancée was sitting in the passenger seat screaming at him to watch out. Wound up rear-ending the car in front of him. Thank God he lived to tell the tale, but that is why it worries me to see you like this.” Yvonne planted her hand on Sarah’s shoulder as she told the story.
“Yikes, I think I slept like two hours into my sleep shift before I started having the nightmares again, woke up, and passed in and out of some restless sleep. It got really bad around oh three hundred. There were sounds... noises like scratching and a loud bang, and the shadows were moving. I just kept feeling like I was being watched, but everyone else seemed to be having disturbed sleep in their bunks. God, it was a creepy feeling.” Sarah took a moment to compose herself.
“I know how crazy this will sound, maybe that I am sleep deprived and likely hallucinating like your friend, but just hear me out. There was something there Yvonne, in the dark at the edge of perception, I could feel it. I also know I wasn’t the only one tossing and turning either. I could also hear scratchy whispering, too. I just hid, strapped in under the weighted blanket. At some point I slept some more, I must have, but not for what felt like a few stressful and draining hours. I'm just making a total mess of explaining this, aren’t I?”
“No, you're fine, girl! I am sorry that happened, my dorm has been pretty quiet, but I have always slept like a rock. Is there anything I can do?”
“I could use a hug.” Sarah said, which caused Yvonne to laugh, breaking some of the tension. They embraced warmly for a good minute, which did wonders for relieving some of the headache and her black mood.
“Thanks, Yvonne, I know it’s all in my head and it’s a vicious feedback cycle due to lack of quality sleep. Thanks for listening without calling me crazy.“ Sarah said, shying away from the last thing she hadn’t the courage to say.
She didn’t dare mention how she had hidden under the covers as she felt it get near. How she had felt something pushing on the mattress. How as her fear peaked, she herself peeked over the covers to find nothing there just to have the oppressive feeling evaporate along with the sensation of pressure by her feet. Her dorm mates all seemed to stop stirring after that, and only then did the nightmares stop for her that night. By then she was left with barely enough time for one last short sleep cycle before the start of A shift that very morning. This was a secret she would have to keep to herself, nobody would believe her anyway.
“I think I'll ask the Chief for a break from my duties today to rest and to visit med bay. Maybe they can give me something to help catch back up on my sleep.” Sarah said.
“Good idea, can I come with? I’ll back you up.” Yvonne said. Sarah smiled at her friend before she nodded at her before they checked off the last of their duties on site and headed away to find the Chief.

The meds I need to be on really are stimulants, but I can't tolerate these anymore because of my Long Covid.
I also have OCD and anxiety, and it got to a point recently where I'd spend every night obsessing over something minor and it was making me miserable. So I decided to try out Prozac (Fluoxetine) again. Now, I've been on this in the past for a few months at a time. It'd help stop me spiralling but it also made me extremely groggy in the afternoon and it made my focus worse. I work in a job where I have to sit at a desk and look at numbers/talk to clients all day. So imagine trying to do this with a) unmedicated ADHD and b) an SSRI that's making your ADHD even worse. So that's why I'd eventually stop.
So I decided to try Prozac again last week, and experimented with taking it at a different time instead (evening rather than morning). I'm also on the lowest dose possible. Lo and behold - I'm still getting extremely tired and foggy for most of the afternoon. People around me say to just "push through" and I keep reading online "just give it 6 weeks"..... Is this something neurotypical people are able to do better?! How can I spend 6 weeks feeling like this without losing my job? From past experience I also know it won't get better in 6 weeks, so I'm just really sad that switching times didn't work for me.
I've spent the last few afternoons crying because I can't focus and feel like a failure. I don't think NT people understand that just the act of forcing yourself to focus when your body really doesn't want to, is so exhausting and depressing in itself.
I also have health anxiety/OCD which doesn't help.
I'm not looking for advice on alternative meds, trust me I've researched a lot. I chose Prozac as it's got the longest half life and the least side effects for me. I'm just sad that nothing seems to work for me. What is good for my body (Prozac) is bad for my brain, and what is good for my brain (stimulants) is bad for my body. It feels like everyone around me is getting diagnosed for ADHD and getting their meds and improving their lives, or NTs who have depression/anxiety seem to eventually find a med that works for them. But I can't find anything. So my choice is to either be stressed and focussed at work, or chill but useless at work. Tbh I wish I didn't have to work, or had a job that was more ADHD friendly, then I'd find things a bit easier.
I'm not sure what my point is, I'm just so frustrated, I can't seem to handle or tolerate anything, I'm sensitive to everything and honestly trying to work the kind of job I do with this type of brain is a nightmare. Can anyone else relate?

Hello everyone, I am a young man from an Arab country. I am 29 years old. I work outside my country and I feel that everyone has changed. Everyone only cares about themselves. I have a chronic disease, which is Crohn’s disease, and I have bleeding in the digestive system. I have a brother. All he cares about is withdrawing the money that I collect. He literally deals with it. In a ridiculous way, it causes me depression, and instead of thanking me, he always says that I should do that, and this is a normal thing for me to work, and he sits and talks in a disgusting way without doing anything that he collects, he spends from it. It causes me severe depression and my psychological situation is literally at its worst😞 "#advice

18

Male 31 years old.
Had some bloods done recently.
2 weeks ago - WBC was 12.5 - Neutrophils was 8.7 - Phosphate mildy low (could have been due to hyperventilation from my anxiety though?)
1 week ago - WBC was 11.2 - Neutrophils went up to 9.2 ****
All my.other complete blood count tests were perfectly normal, esr normal, CRP normal, thyroid normal and iron levels normal.
So my white cells came down, but neutrophils went up?
My doctor said don't worry these levels can fluctuate all the time. I've checked my blood results from years ago and my neutrophils normally sits around a 5.
I have been stressed and anxious lately. No notable infections or anything that I know of. (Other than a bad cold about a month ago). I bite the inside of my cheeks which causes bleeding but not sure if this could be a cause?
My doctor said no need to panic and he will just retest my bloods in a month. Does this sound reasonable advice?
I'm scared of things like cancer but my doctor said no need to think this or test for it at this stage. He said barely any doctors would test for cancer at this stage?
Have I gotten good advice?

I wrote this in about an hour last night. I usually don't share my writings cause I'm so self conscious but this one just felt different. I'm curious as to what you all think.
Want Versus Need
I Want to be a woman To totally be me I Want to be a human Not just something that bleeds I Want to be a sister And have mine love me I Want to have a family That’s living in glee
I Want to be happy To know my own role I Want to have reasons To reach all of my goals I Want to have a life And finally be whole I Want to know the feeling Of having a soul
I Want to be beautiful Not just on the outside I Want to be certain Of where I abide I Want to know freedom And not have to hide I Want to be revered For what’s on the inside
I Want to be vigorous To push through and win I Want to appear How I’m feeling within I Want to be strong And have thick skin I Want to have courage Not to just try and fit in
I Want… No wait Let me stop and breathe I don’t Want No no What I mean is I Need
I Need to be a woman And do my own thing I Need to be a person Not just a human being I Need to have some help With what I am carrying I Need to have support Like someone who’s listening
I Need to have courage To break out of my shell To remove this mask And step out of this hell I may not be a man But that’s good and well Cause we are all unique With our own stories to tell
Just let me explain this I’m no man that grows old I am a woman of Earth And one to behold There will be those that hate This world is so cold I’ll stay strong and vigilant No matter what is sold I am beautiful and protean Just like pure gold This life is an odyssey Is yours worthy of being told?

“Well…..frak.”
Those were the only words Corporal James Diogenes could think of to describe his current situation. Behind him, he watched as his comrades turning tail and running away.
“Cowards. Cowards one and all.”
He spit into the dirt towards his former allies then turned towards the other part of his problem.
Xenos. A large army of Xenos, one that was far more disciplined and had far more bodies than command had assumed. He couldn’t remember what they were called or even remember the name of the planet he was on. He couldn’t care for either topic. He wasn’t surprised that the Intel he and his colleagues had been fed was wrong, it often was, but never to this degree. The enemy outnumbered the imperial army forces at least 7 to 1 if not far more. Their tactics were similar to those employed by the imperial army but their population meant they could do more tactical maneuvers, on more fronts, at the same time.
Why the imperial navy didn’t annihilate those armies from orbit, James would never understand. Given his current situation he most likely wouldn’t get a chance to ask. He checked the magazine on his auto-gun, the rifle being rather old by the standards of the current imperial army but its age held up as it punched through most body armor he came across.
“…..Frak.”
He cursed again as he inspected the magazine. Three, maybe four rounds left before he was out? He looked over his shoulder and sighed. The cowards took the ammo with them along with any other supplies they could carry, leaving an empty trench and a few rows of rusty flay-wire.
And James but he chose to stay behind.
A low chuckle escaped him as that thought came to mind. He shook his head as he took his spot in the trench. He wouldn’t win this fight, he was sure of it, but by Terra and in the Emperor’s name he would make them bleed. He would make them hurt.
The few rounds he had in his magazine were gone in no times at all. Four enemies laying in the dust and being trampled by their friends was proof of that. He smiled grimly as he watched his enemies march towards him. They had all bowed their heads slightly, seemingly expecting more shots. That got him laughing. A few bullets and a whole army was shaking before him. He wondered if this is what the primarchs, the emperors daughters, felt like whenever they were on crusade.
He tossed his empty rifle to the side. His smile grew as he held his knife, gripping it tightly as he watched the advancing line of xeno scum. The leather of his glove strained as his hidden knuckles grew white from how tightly he gripped his knife. He considered for a moment what he’d do when the enemy came into the trench. He knew he would fight and die, but he wondered how many of them he’d kill before they took him down.
He reached back behind him, grabbing the Krak grenade he had attached to his belt. He held it tightly and used the middle finger of his knife hand to pull the pin. He held close, holding the striker lever down to ensure it wouldn’t go off until he let go of it. Then he waited.
The world closed in. Darkness tinted the edge of his vision as he watched his enemy march ever closer. Nothing existed save for him and the enemy. He knew what this was. Adrenaline, anticipation, and fear all coming together to activate his fight-or-flight response. He whole body felt charged and he had to stop himself from jumping out of the trench and running…..where? He wasn’t sure. He couldn’t guarantee his body wouldn’t turn tail and follow the rest of the imperial army back to the transports.
He adjusted his cap, scratched his bearded cheek and continued to watch. Watch and wait. That was all he could do now. His breathing grew heavy and erratic, his teeth barred, and a low growl escaped him.
The marching stopped.
He stared and waited.
A ploy? A chance to surrender maybe? Were they simply calling in artillery on his position?
That last thought stopped him. Artillery. Would they call artillery or an orbital strike or some other long distance attack on his position?
No. No, no, no, no they wouldn’t escape him that easy.
He scowled and climbed out of the trench, charging the Xenos line with a roar. The knife was raised over his head, holding it in an upside down fashion, as he sprinted towards his enemy. He refused to die to some cowardly artillery strike, he absolutely refused to be turned into a red smear on some backwater planet that no one would ever remember or care about.
The enemy….ran. They ran! He laughed as he chased after them. It didn’t make sense and he didn’t care. He couldn’t care, he was beyond caring.
“Get back here you throne damned bastards! GET THE FRAK BACK HERE!”
He slowed down long enough to toss the Krak grenade, laughing loudly when he saw it go off and take a handful of Xenos down.
The blood….was blood always so beautiful?
He continued running after the enemy before he stopped again. He stopped running cause something had stopped him. He didn’t understand, his legs were still under him, he was still alive, he could still fight!
“Kraking, bastard, filthy xenos, kill you all-“
“Shut up.”
He stopped talking, the voice snapping him out of…..whatever that was. He regained control and realized why he stopped running. Something had picked him up. He stared down at the ground only to realize how high he was above it.
“Hnngh, let go of me.”
He turned towards whatever was holding him only for his eyes to grow wide.
There stood….a woman. A very big woman with metallic dreadlocks poking out of her skull, her armor exposing skin and flesh in the fashion of a gladiator of old. He stared at him with a raised eyebrow and a silent growl as a twitch of pain or anger made her right eye close for a half second.
“Excuse me….heh….corporal.”
She said his rank as if it was an insult, even going as far as spitting on the ground after she said it. She held up by the back of his flak vest like he was little more than a lost puppy. She treated him like he wasn’t worth even talking to and that he was some stupid grunt who was simply in the way.
Space marines raced past both of them, ignoring them in favor of chasing after the retreating Xenos. They….were gonna steal his glory.
“Let me go damn you, the fights over there!”
The woman laughed loudly. Her head held back as her laughter echoed over the battlefield. A part of him thought her laughter was the most horrific and beautiful sound he ever heard, but it was overshadowed by his growing rage.
“You wouldn’t do-hnngghh-do anything to those alien freaks by yourself. Go home boy. Run with the rest of your fri-“
He swiped at her and smiled widely when he saw a small, paper thin cut open up on her cheek. A small trickle of blood dribbled down her skin as her smile disappeared. Her free hand came up and wiped at the cut. She studied the small swipe of blood on her finger. The cut was nothing, it wouldn’t even scar and she had lost far more blood then this in the blood pits. But something about this man taking a swipe at her, daring to cut her, daring to even consider killing or harming her…..
She smiled widely and put the man on her shoulder.
“You. I like you. You’re mine now little man.”
He tried to jump off but she held firm and turned away from the battle. Her sons would handle the fight. He roared on her shoulder and struggled against her grip, his rage growing as he did everything he could to get into the fight and kill. He wanted to, no needed to spill blood. He needed to kill, he needed to make them bleed.
But this goddess in bronze wouldn’t let him. She walked away and set him down in a space marine Rhino. He didn’t know her, he didn’t know why she took him, and he didn’t care. Instead he sighed and hung his head as he lit a iho stick.
“Don’t worry Corporal, there will be more glory to be had.”
He stared at her. His eyes were bloodshot, his body covered in dust and he felt exhausted.
“Hnngh…frakking….throne damn you….”
She smiled widely at that and pulled the trigger on her chainaxe. She then turned towards the driver.
“On second thought, hmm let’s go. I wanna see what you got little corporal.”
He smiled at that and stood up, popping his neck. He exhaustion was forgotten for the time being as the thought of killing those damned Xenos got his blood pumping and made him want to move.
“By the way.”
The giantess spoke as the rear hatch opened, revealing the same battlefield he had just left.
“My name is Atalanta.”
Please note: I’m not a writer and this whole story came to me while I was in a shower and from my lack of artistic skill. Sorry if it’s trash.

Blood cancer is also known as hematologic cancer. Most of the cancer starts in the bone marrow which is the centre of our bones. In the bone marrow stem cells develop three types of blood cells: red blood cells, white blood cells, or platelets. When abnormal cells grow out of control then blood cancer is made. It affects the production and function of blood cells. Normal blood cells fight against infection and carry oxygen through our body. It produces new blood cells and controls bleeding. Main three types of blood cancers there are:
Leukemia is the most common cancer in teenagers & children. It is caused by the fast production of abnormal white blood cells.
Lymphoma affects our lymphatic system which removes excess fluids and produces immune cells in our body.
Myeloma starts in the bone marrow and affects our plasma cells. It is white blood cells that make disease and infection-fighting antibodies in our body.
Blood Cancer Treatment in India
India has major advances in blood cancer treatment. There are quality treatment methods. There are many top-quality hospitals and hematologist surgeons for treating blood cancer. There are different types of treatments required for the patient's overall health. It may include chemotherapy, immunotherapy, stem cell/bone marrow transplantation, and radiotherapy as per the treatment plan.
Blood cancer differs by type and stage but generally, some symptoms include anemia, unexplained weight loss, bone and joint pain, swelling, persistent fever, lumps or swellings, frequent infections, etc.
Blood Cancer Treatment Cost in India
Blood cancer treatment in India could based on different factors, such as type of cancer and treatment plan, hospitalization, tests and diagnostic tools, speed of recovery, etc. The average cost of blood cancer treatment is 2,396 USD.
Best Blood Cancer Treatment Hospitals in India
Blood cancer is common nowadays. India has a lot of the best hospitals for blood cancer treatment. They give the latest protocols by world-class facilities. Some of the hospital's names are given below:
Global Hospital (Chennai)
Manipal Hospital (Delhi)
Jaslok Hospital (Mumbai)
Artemis Hospital (Gurgaon)
Max Hospital Saket (Delhi)
Medanta –The Medicity (Gurgaon)
Top Blood Cancer Treatment Doctor in India
The best blood cancer treatment doctors in India are well known for its good skills and years of expertise in this specialized field. These top doctors give the best blood cancer treatment to patients with hematologic diseases.
Dr. Rakesh Chopra (Director& Head of Medical Oncology)
Dr. Ashok Vaid.(PediatricHematologist & Oncologist)
Dr. Gaurav Kharya (Pediatric Hematologic-Oncologist)
Dr. Dharma Choudhary (Pediatric Hematologist & Medical Oncologist)
Dr. AmitaMahaja (Oncologist & Hematologist)
Dr. P Anoop (Assistant Proffesor & Hemato-Oncologist)
Dr. Rahul Bhargava. Specialty: Pediatric Oncology & BMT Specialist.
Al AfiyaMedi Tour is a leading medical tourism company in India. We offer medical tourism services such as finding the right doctor, the right hospital, and cost estimation for medical treatment in India for foreign patients. Some of the main countries are Bangladesh, South Africa, Egypt, Uganda, Zambia, Sudan, Dubai, Namibia, Iraq, Kenya, Saudi Arabia, Ethiopia, Nigeria, and so on. We provide free medical assistance for TURP surgery cost, lung cancer treatment, breast cancer treatment cost, stomach cancer treatment, arthroscopic surgery, bone marrow transplant cost, best liver transplant hospital, brain tumor surgery, cosmetic andplastic surgery, heart surgery, spine tumor surgery, cancer treatment cost, lung transplant, etc. If you are searching for free medical and healthcare consulting to find the best hospitals and top doctors and surgeons in India for any treatment then contact us- Alafiyameditour.com.
Source: https://alafiyameditour1.blogspot.com/2024/05/blood-cancer-treatment-in-india-for.html

Still having cramps 3/10 and still bleeding a little. My partner and I decided to meet tomorrow as we have some errands to do. Since yesterday I have been feeling super horny and I’m worried fr our meetup tomorrow if in case I can’t control it and do it with him. Will it affect the process? Or can it cause any complications for me or for him or for the both of us? Need help.

Grrrrrrrrrrr 🦁🐯
I am truth, motherfuck. 😠😡🤬👿👿👿
“Them superpowers getting neutralized, I can only watch in silence
The famous actor we once knew is lookin' paranoid and now spiralin'
You're movin' just like a degenerate, every antic is feelin' distasteful
I calculate you're not as calculated, I can even predict your angle
Fabricating stories on the family front 'cause you heard Mr. Missy Morale
A pathetic master manipulator, I can smell the tales on you now
You're not a rap artist, you a scam artist with the hopes of being accepted…
Know you a master manipulator and habitual liar too
But don't tell no lie about me and I won't tell truths 'bout you”
No one believes your sick, deluded lies anymore, dumb bitch.
👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️
How can you even stand anymore given how much you continue to shoot yourself in the foot? I give warnings. I gave warnings.
AND STILL you keep choosing fear. Well you can’t instill anymore. The poison’s been purged and I created the antidote myself, fucker.
“How many more fairytale stories 'bout your life 'til we had enough?”
You. Have. Lost. Control. Your narrative no longer makes sense. But you want to keep trying to DARVO me??? ME??! You keep wanting to try me. So you keep my treasure in your grasps. Not for much motherfucking longer.
“Don't speak on the family, crodie
It can get deep in the family, crodie
Talk about me and my family, crodie?
Someone gon' bleed in your family, crodie
I be at New Ho King eatin' fried rice with a dip sauce and blammy, crodie
Tell me you're cheesin', fam
We can do this right now on the camera, crodie
Ayy, fuck y'all niggas, I don't trust y'all niggas
I wave one finger and thump y'all niggas like mmm
Field goal, punt y'all niggas, they punk y'all niggas, nobody never took my food
Whoever that's fuckin' with him, fuck you niggas, and fuck the industry too
If you take it there, I'm takin' it further Psst, that's somethin' you don't wanna do”
It’ll just keep getting worse. And I won’t have to move a finger. I am a fractal of truth and the fractal of truth is me.
“It's nothin' nobody can tell me, huh
I don't wanna talk on no celly, huh
You know I got language barriers, huh
It's no accent you can sell me, huh”
I put in the work through the truth. It took on a life through me. Look at the healing web I have created. And we all have ourselves first, like you said none of us should. I transmute toxicity into healing. I alchemize shame into respect. I lack of earth, but am the bull, torus.
Be scared of the truth. It’s cute, smells like vanilla, and will never cease to exist, bitch.
Edit: formatting

I was first diagnosed with MDD when I was 13. It got easier as I got older but it was almost always there in some capacity. 2 years ago when I had my hormonal IUD removed, it got really bad. I couldn't get out of bed or shower, I was drinking constantly and I even relapsed with self-harm for the first time in 9 years. Thats when I found out I had PCOS. I started taking Spironolactone and poof, my depression disappeared. It was kind of miraculous actually. I lost 30 lbs in 2 months, I stopped drinking almost entirely, and I actually had energy.
Well the Spironolactone was causing me to bleed everyday. That plus the fact that my testosterone wasn't going down like it should have at my dose, my doctor decided to take me off of it for a few months (jan 1st -April 1st) so that they could measure my base hormones and metabolites. I warned them that I would get extremely depressed without the meds and they assured me it wouldn't be for that long.
Months later I finally take my hormone test. My depression is back with a vengeance at this point. I cant get out of bed, I've gained 20 lbs and I have even cut myself. All this to say, I am sinking and sinking fast. I meet with my doctor a month later to get my results and get on some meds. HE FORGOT ABOUT THE TEST ENTIRELY. When I reminded him he looked for 2 seconds, said he never received the results and to basically try again in a month. When I called the company that administered the test they said results were sent to him 3 weeks prior! I even asked him if I could take Spironolactone for the time being but he said I had to ask the pharmacy to request a refill (shocker there was no refill for it, it had to be a new prescription).
So now I am in limbo waiting another month in this hell, or waiting for this guy to actually give a fuck. I just feel so hopeless and dejected. I don't know what to do, I'm scared of my depression and I'm not sure I can do this for another month. I guess this is just me venting but if anyone has any advice, I'd appreciate it.
TLDR: So depressed I relapsed with self-harm and my doctor isn't helping

Kinda sucks that the team got gassed and outplayed. No Offense and decent defense. The only promising thing I can see was we set the tone 2 - 0 we made them bleed and woken up the beast. Kinda sucks we don't have a reply to them. Timberwolves could have won the series if not because of the foul calls, Jamal heatpads nor the favoritism but they lost the capacity to remember how to play. I hate how Ant went nuclear game 4 but Kat still a no show. The line up of trying to not include a stretch big if Rudy or slowmo is in. There is no balance in the lineup they sitting down players like flies. Offense of Jaden, Naw and Reid vanished. Rudy got outplayed again and again. Nobody can beat denver. We seriously need to trade for bench pieces this off season or atleast pray to God Jaden can be the 3rd option on offense cause he is shit and paying one dimensional players for a a huge contract is not the recipe. So fuck you nori for your obsession with SLOWMO TRADE THAT MOTHER FUCKER OUT. SLOPPY MOTHER FUCKER.

Hello just joined the group hopefully a certified tech here or perhaps a mobile mechanic could lend me a hand for a min. Have an 08 gsxr 750 I'm the sole owner, so i know exactly what has and hasn't been done to the bike. Issue a few years back 1 of my 3 headlights blew I forget what side exactly, I replaced the left an right bulbs didn't touch them at all during installation so no greasy finger stuff on them. Not to long after this while riding going roughly 90-150 or so the radiator blew, local dealership wanted an crazy price of 600 for a radiator so I went with an aftermarket one. After installing it and running the bike I noticed the bike still ran hotter then normal or hotter then when before the radiator blew to begin with. Normal was the bike would get to 220 degrees the fan would kick on an almost cool the water back down to 208 or 209 even though the fan already turned off at 210. My next 3 assumptions were exactly that without any change, I figured maybe the thermostat went bad so replaced it, ran the bike same issue still ran hot. Next round was is it possible the water pump impeller or bearing went bad, replaced an still same bike ran hot. I said maybe the fan somehow got moved away from the radiator or maybe wasn't as snug as the factory radiator after the swap so bent the brackets to move it as close as possible to suck as much air as possible through the radiator to better cool the liquid ice that's already in the system. An yes that was kinda my 4th attempt swapping from reg alum safe antifreeze to engine ice cause it was supposed to lower the temp instantly. Well none of that worked. Also with all that being said after each time, I did said repair an exposed the open system to the element I did rock the bike back an fourth an low as I possibly could without dropping it to burp the system as well as run the bike an open the purge screw on the side of the case to bleed any excess air out. Again no change an the bike still runs hott rpughly in the 230 mark, I'm sorry this is a bit of a read. To get to the question since I now think I discovered the problem which is, I noticed one day while my bike was warming up that I had the headlight switch on the high beam position. Although the lights were working as should soon as I flipped the switch from high to low I heard the rpm's of the fan ramp up an the bike start to cool off better. So I guess really the question is, has anyone here ever had a similar issue? If so or not opinions if you think it's the headlight bulbs I replaced or the switch it's self to turn the lights from high to low or the pass button.

I’m almost 8 weeks postpartum and am breastfeeding I just got a nexplanon inserted about a week ago and I’m still blEeding with my first baby I stopped bleeding exactly at 3 weeks and was not breastfeeding and also got the depo shot on the 3wk mark so this is all new to me could the blEeding be caused by my nexplanon btw I never stopped bleeding ever since birth so I’m going on wk 8 of bleeding I’m so over it lol

So the last few years have been rough.
*note* if you're a "cheaters will always be cheaters type" tldr is don't bother reading or commenting
BACKSTORY 2019-2023 child nearly annual broken bones, lots of stress and specialist visits.
2018-2024 my wife got her associates as a medical assistant and is almost done with her bachelor's and final quarter internship while working full time and that has been hard for me. The lack of time for me and my son has really made an impact.
2019 I was injured at work and 2020 had my first surgery to try and preserve an ankle joint. That surgery ended up failing and while recovering I ended up mangling 2 fingertips in a wood jointer. 2020 I had to make the transition to a sahd on workers comp and have been since then. My lifestyle of hiking and fishing was upended because I could barely be on my feet 3 hours a day and uneven ground killed me not to mention the whole covid thing was pretty isolating.
All of 2021 was supporting her being a surrogate for a couple in City X (their egg/sperm). So, lots of trips checks and giving her injections. It was kind of proving myself to her because I was terrified when our son was born in 2017 and didn't help as much as I should have. Especially the first 3 months. Really, I didn't find out until later. We had conversations and fights at the time and id step up to do more and she would agree and tell me it was all okay. Then another fight saying I wasn't doing enough/anything and asking more and me being upset and confused. I guess at the time she was afraid to ask more, or tell me what she wanted, or her feelings, and the postpartum depression and initial feelings of abandonment didn't help.
Anyways the surrogacy went okay. I was there and supportive. Rubbing her feet and back. taking on extra load when she was tired etc. And hey I didn't pass out at delivery this time XD The end was a bit hard with 2 inductions needed and a massive 9.5lb baby and a stuck shoulder.
Then a few weeks after birth in November 2021 the nightmare began.
Out of nowhere she started hemorrhaging. She had to have an emergency D&C to stop the bleeding and scans showed a mass. Turned out the surrogate baby's placenta had some cells turn cancerous and attach to her uterus (Choriocarcinoma). 3 months later and the first 3 agent chemo failed, and her numbers were skyrocketing because it turned treatment resistant. They had to hit it with 5 types of chemo (EMACO) leaving future fertility a coin toss but more than a hysterectomy. By May 2022 the tumor marker was gone, but it was 6 months of intense monitoring and 6 months of monthly monitoring. The whole time she was in an intense spiraling depression questioning life. The meaning of all it, and how all her childhood trauma was fair. That no god would let a child live that. And questioning every decision in her life and wondering what things could have been like if she went a different direction. Feeling like she missed out on opportunities early in life. If this might be all there is (we have been together since she was 17). She said she felt like reality wasn't real and this was make believe at times.
Summer 2022 she made a new mom friend. She was pretty toxic and selfish. She used my wife for personal benefit and to go places. Yelled at her kids and treated the oldest from a prior marriage as less than (girl doesn't know her dad and when she mentioned she was part Mexican she freaked out and denied it because of how conservative and anti Mexican her new dad and his family is). Like never offered a dime, but expected food, gas, tickets, and gifts. She drove my wife nuts with that behavior. but she was desperate for a friend and loved her kids. Her friend would just talk shit about her partner pretty constantly and say my wife should be unhappy in her relationship too. Shit talking husbands behind their backs became like a mutual thing and I def hated it
Sometime 2023 she jumped into fantasy romance and fantasy smut /erotica. This progressed to an AI chat smut generator.
May 2023 monitoring was over and she was officially cancer free and had been on a health/mental health quest..
The mental health part started early in the year and she was seeing a therapist for depression and anxiety alone as well as her long list of childhood trauma. Off hand her therapist told her a few times she didn't know maybe just divorce me or something. I was super uncomfortable with this as it was completely outside her practicing scope and I didn't feel she should be providing relationship guidance, especially without me or the rest of the story. I felt a bit attacked and didn't even get the chance to give my perspective or account and felt that is pretty important after being here for a decade. A lot of negative points get omitted by her.
Summer 2023 she had some tough diagnosis for other chronic issues. Narcolepsy Dissociative Identity disorder Depression And a sleep disorder
I initially rejected this as I didn't want to accept these chronic and incurable conditions and insisted it has to be something else, that she's okay. It was taken as rejection of her.
Fall 2023 she reached out to a childhood ex bf a few states away and started an emotional affair. They kept in infrequent contact over the years and nothing ever came of it before. He has been unable to move past her or have meaningful relationships in 13 years. At first he pushed her away and rejected it, but after a month by Nov it was a thing. Texting saying I shouldn't worried because they dated before, but he ended up coming out as gay, calls in private, staying later after work. I gave it the benefit of the doubt but got burned. I found out in December the second time she wanted a private call in the car, and I checked her phone.
We started marriage counseling in Jan and I started my own therapy search as well as a condition of hers. She agreed to no longer contact the boy showed me the sent message ending it and blocked him. By Feb I found him listed in her phone as Saraa and found deleted texts and calls. In therapy she wanted to keep him as a friend and only friend and I tried this. She asked if a PO box would be okay for a birthday present, and I said no. That it crossed a line. It was also super close to Valentine's day. Next therapy I couldn't handle the anxiety and feeling physically ill when she used her phone, and we went through Jan again break off block etc.
In Feb the therapist recommended a separate space for conflict as we work on things. That too much conflict triggered her dissociative identity disorder. It was either a hotel as needed or a rv/camper. My wife was set on a camper and the only way to get a newer one was to add my credit/income to hers for a loan and I was uncomfortable on a $20k purchase. She assured me the intent of the camper was working on us and not separating/divorcing. She brought up me not having chores completely done all the time and I poured myself into it if that was making her unhappy over the years.
During this time in March I found out she got the secret PO box and had yet again resumed texting entirely deleting her logs. She had valentines gifts. birthday gifts, long distance electronic bracelets, and had an easter basket coming. Everything was put together into a box to be gotten rid of. That effort I had for chores and making everything spotless kind of died. Like there was that recognition that that obviously wasn't the problem. We lived completely separately for a few weeks until she could make a choice. We split our son and had almost zero interaction. Eventually she chose and I saw a notebook she used once in December. Basically she has started outlining a story envisioning herself as the lead character in once of her romantic fantasies and cast me and the other man as competing love interests
April and early may there was nothing. We did therapy and tackled our issues slowly. Together. Our future plans: college vs baby and the ticking clock of fertility and ifs after chemo. Etc
Last week she was going out for lilac picking and didn't text me for 2 hours and said she was at the beach. Later she showed me something in her email and I saw discord emails about a pw change and login. One bad gut feeling later and the next morning I see she deleted the discord emails and check our phone plan and her phone and see missing texts. I put in a phone record request for recent texts and text/call logs. She woke up and I said it did it and she said I was disgusting. Then admitted I was right.
She says after breaking it off she was worried he would hurt himself and just wanted to be sure he was okay and admitted to 3 texts and the discord call which i verified. Said that he was in therapy for his issues. She said she didn't want to bring it up to me because I would make it a fight and she thought she could just get away with a few texts to make sure. That she felt responsible for how much he had been hurt too.
So I did what I do with extreme anxiety and checked her work bag. I found an old journal they shared Jan to mid-march. Kind of confirmed again what was going on. Also revealed she lied to me about the trailer, or him? She couldn't get it without me and told him it was to work on separating from me easier. Yeah I kept pics in case this goes downhill because yeah, I'll gun for EVERYTHING. I'm sure that being tricked into signing a $20k contract under false pretenses for her personal benefit, secret po boxes, lying to our therapist repeatedly, secret texts, expecting gifts from the other man, career over spending time with family and a serious personality disorder on top of narcolepsy making a job hard to keep down wont do her favors at divorce/custody hearings.
So its all fresh for me again. I already have extreme anxiety and the autism doesn't help with reading/understanding people the best, although my gut intuition and pattern recognition are catching stuff fine.
WHERE I THINK I AM
Looking back, I can see that the personality disorder and narcolepsy are apparent. Dream delusion and memory issues from the narcolepsy make separating dream from reality hard as well as just recalling what happened. So whether not the "not feeling like reality is real" was a dream delusion or a full-blown dissociative episode... I can also see that messaging him was a "new" personality state. Maybe it's a manifestation of the trauma of nearly dying from cancer, maybe it's a fragment of her young identity that was created to survive her traumatic childhood resurfacing after nearly dying. But her interests and perspective massively shifted at that time and there was a clear separation between her with me and her with him. It was like this regression back to 15. Like she was molding an identity to fit his desires and interests. She took up tarot and witchy books, different music, painting, rockhounding (my interest), dried bouquets, dyed her hair and got multiple piercings. Even getting caught there was that click in her whole demeanor.
I can see how her friend may have jaded her towards me by all the shit she talked about HER husband. I can see that throwing herself into fantasy smut to cope flooded her with portrayals of unrealistic romance. That she progressed that by using an AI smut bot to hold those conversations with. Then she directly tried to process her own reality through the lens of those novels in that journal.
This "relationship" was "I love you, we can be together in 10 years". He wasn't going to leave his cushy job. Or his state. He didn't want to be a stepdad. He didn't want to support her career or have any involvement in it. She couldn't leave my state. Never saw illicit photos. No discussion of sex. It was like exactly what you think some lovestruck preteens would come up with. Like just a fantasy. No talk of bills or finances. Of moving. Of any substantial tangible entanglement.
Somehow that's easier to handle
I love her and don't want to leave her. But i desperately think she needs serious help and have told her I want her to do therapy 2x a month (on top of marriage therapy 2x).
I also think if a secret or deleted text happens again, I've got to take off the kid gloves and fight for it all. Cause well showing up at the dude's door would end in prison.
I'm sure this happening right as I fully got over last time and took a trust leap of faith on a "gay" friend that burned me will make it harder. I get the last few years have been garbage luck and I get almost dying can have profound affects though. She had been utterly loyal for 5 years (believe me I checked as we agreed to ie open book). Tying to see this with an open mind.
I get my exact expectations are muddy and part of this is just putting it into words to process for me, but I value if someone has any good input

You know the part in phase 2 when the violins start going off? Is it supposed to sound like Sawashiro's theme or is it a coincidence? Cause if it is supposed to be a reference, I'm curious as to why they implemented his motif into Ebina's theme (besides him bleeding out in the hackground). I wanna theorize that it's maybe Arakawa's theme so Sawashiro and Ebina have it or something but idk.

Hi everyone, I had my transfer on 5/13 (Monday) and i am experiencing light brown spotting whenever i go to the bathroom. Is this a bad sign? Its way too early for implantation bleeding and i’m spiraling thinking my chances are ruined.
I did a fully medicated transfer and from what i could tell, it went well except for the initial catheter they used was too soft so they had to change it out. Im also on PIO injections only (no suppositories). I just dont want my bleeding to cause harm to my embaby. Please help me 😭😭 thank you!

33M, caucasian, non-smoker, social drinker, history of SVT with overall low risk factors. Currently taking Pantapropozole, Carvidolol, Multivitamin, Iron, Miralax. I'll attempt to make this short-winded and hope this counts as appropriate for this subreddit!. Around ~August 2023, I suddenly started having random spikes/drops in my sugar levels, as well as fatigue and notable weight loss (40 pounds over 4 1/2 months). My previous PCP started the workup and over the next ~3 months, I was in and out of hospital admissions/countless doctor visits. Over this time I started to develop more symptoms, most notably night sweats, increasing GI issues, and worsening fatigue/tiredness.
Because the symptoms were mostly non-specific, I had pretty broad, general workups with few things off (my hemoglobin dropped several points in November then slowly recouped back to 15.5. Saw a hematologist and he basically just said "you had a bleed, it clotted off and now you're recovering. If it drops again come back to me"). Full body CT w/contrast, MRI of spine/brain, colonoscopy/endoscopy, spinal tap, echo, CPX, countless blood tests which I would fail to mention all of, but including endocrine/rheumatological and autoimmune markers, as well as viral potential causes.
At some point in December my gp basically threw his hands up and said "we don't have anything to work with, the few abnormal things are recovering". Fast forward to February, I end up in the ER with severe nausea and a dull pain below my lower left rib cage. They do a repeat CT and mention that my spleen is still "minimally enlarged" but there are no noticable masses, and my liver is "no longer slightly enlarged". These are two things I was never told about, I suppose because they felt they weren't significant enough? But made me realize I needed another opinion/better guidance. The radiologist also noted on the report that I had "mild haziness near the mesenteric root of the pancreas level", but "pancreas unremarkable otherwise" as well as normal lymph nodes in the area. He recommended checking for pancreatitis and/or mesenteritis.
I go into a new GP in March. She's fantastic - extremely thorough and importantly doesn't immediately try to blame this all on the easy things. She gets me into GI and hematology (had another GI doctor but she wanted me to get another opinion, as the old one basically said your colonoscopy/egd are normal, come back in 7 years). Hematology came first, and he basically said objectively, you acutely then chronically bled, used up all your iron stores which caused excess fatigue (fatigue/tiredness is still a primary issue for me but is substantially better than a month ago when I started iron supplementation) and now you're recouping. We can do a bone marrow biopsy or a PET scan, but I can tell you what they will show: nothing. I asked about the spleen/livemesentery involvement and he just said "your blood work and scans show no sign of a mass, if malignancy were making you this symptomatic, it would be more obvious and you wouldn't have seen any improvement. In addition your liver has reduced in size and your spleen is still barely enlarged with no signs of mass, malignancy doesn't act this way".
I leave the visit at least more optimistic about the situation, but still feeling awful and like this is some type of GI related malignancy that's killing me, frankly. (As a side note, symptoms became so problematic that I had to stop working full time which has obviously been another stresser during all of this).
Then the GI visit comes (about 2 weeks ago now at this point). We go over everything and he just basically says "let's skip the MRI and go for a pillcam to get a closer look at your small intestines, and an endoscopic ultrasound to take a closer look at your pancreas and this inflamed part of your mesentery". Sounds great to me! I know people go years looking for a diagnosis sometimes, but the last 8 months have been the most exhausting/stressful/longest of my life and he seemed adamant about getting to the bottom of this.
Here's where my concern/question comes in: back in December in my last hospital admission, the hospitalist asked what I thought this may be. I pretty quickly said PC, because of the way things progressed and the initial, non-specific symptoms + sugar issues (which seem to have mostly gotten better? I've also regained 30 pounds since, which is a "good" sign I know). He kind of laughed and just said "your pancreas has been imaged and looked at twice by two separate radiologists and neither saw anything to worry about" (this was before the February scan showing mesentery involvement). I kind of gave up on that idea/worry for a long time because of the assured way he answered my concern over it, but now I've got it in my head that that's what has been the culprit all this time and have been told CT's miss signs of PC pretty frequently, and the mesentery/spleen findings are a result of pancreatic tail or body involvement that's spread, which the GI did mention it was unlikely to be in the head as you'd almost certainly see bile duct involvement/jaundice evidence at this point, or the classic pale/clay stools, which I haven't had.
I know there is pretty strong evidence to this point to suggest it isn't a pancreatic tumor, given 3 contrast CT's now over 9 months with no sign of it, improvement in some symptoms (night sweats are virtually gone, fatigue is significantly better), some of the more obvious/common symptoms not being there, like the stool/jaundice, but instinctively this just feels like the right place to look. I'm not terrified of a diagnosis at this point, but I'm absolutely mortified that this is going to get worse before I have the chance to even figure out what it is because of the things that have continued to worsen (nausea/malaise in the morning especially, tiredness/dyspnea... Well, the dyspnea has improved since the iron supplementation as well, but considering I could get up and run five miles 9 months ago and now a small flight of stairs whip me...). The idea of losing ~6 months of valuable time if I'd pushed this concern harder back in December is also a hard pill to swallow. Speaking of, the pillcam is Thursday, and the EUS is the 28th. I tried to move it up but they are booked out (I feel like I they suspected pancreatic cancer they would have got me in sooner as well) and I don't want to push it anymore in the case that it isn't that, and I potentially take someone's spot that needs it before I do. I guess I'm asking for someone to talk me off this ledge and trust that something obvious wasn't missed, or even recommend I continue to push this as maybe it sounds like a familiar situation someone has witnessed in the past where it ended up being something like PC. I think I've mentally accepted almost every potential outcome of this situation except for that one, which likely has to do with me being intimately familiar with what it looked like in the end for a friend.
That was... Long-winded. Sorry, I tried haha. I wish you all the best of health moving forward!