When you were a kid, and you saw a rainbow, did you ever want to try to get to the end of it? I bet you did. I did, anyway. It wasn’t the mythical pot of gold that tempted me. Wealth was too abstract of a concept at that age to dream about, and leprechauns were creepy little bastards. I just wanted to see what the rainbow looked like up close, and maybe even try to climb it.
Of course, you can’t get to the end of a rainbow because not only is there no end, but there isn’t even really a rainbow. It’s an illusion caused by the sunlight passing through raindrops at the right angle. If you did try to chase a rainbow down, it would move with you until it faded away. That’s why chasing rainbows is a pretty good metaphor for pursuing a beautiful illusion that can never manifest as anything concrete.
I bring all this up because I think it was that same type of urge that compelled me to chase down the Effulgent One. It’s not a perfect analogy, however, considering that I did actually catch up to the eldritch bastard.
I first saw the Effulgent One a little over two years ago. My employer – who happens to be an occultist mad scientist by the name of Erich Thorne – had tasked me with returning a young girl named Elifey to her village on the northern edges of the county. The people of Virklitch Village are very nice, but they’re also an insular, Luddite cult who worship a colossal spectral entity they call the Effulgent One. I saw this Titan during my first visit to Virklitch, and more importantly, he saw me. He left a streak of black in my soul, marking me as one of his followers. I can feel him now, when he walks in our world. Sometimes, if I look towards the horizon after sundown, I can even see him.
This entity, and my connection to him, is understandably something my employer has taken an interest in. I’ve been to Virklitch many times since my first visit, and I’ve successfully collected a good deal of vital information about the Effulgent One. The Virklitchen are the only ones who know how to summon him, and coercing them into doing so would only earn us his wrath. He’s sworn to protect them, though I haven’t the slightest idea of what motivates him to do so.
Even though I can see him, I usually try not to look, to pretend he’s not there. The Virklitchen have warned me never to chase after him. Before Virklitch was founded, the First Nations people who lived in this region were aware of the Effulgent One, though they called him the Sky Strider. Any of them that went chasing after him either failed, went mad, or were never seen again.
I was out driving after sunset, during astronomical twilight when the trees are just black silhouettes against a burnt orange horizon, when I sensed the presence of the Effulgent One. He was to the east, towering along the darkening skyline, idling amidst the fields of cyclopean wind turbines. I could see their flashing red lights in the periphery of my vision, and I knew that one of those lights was him. I tried to fight the urge to look, but fear began to gnaw at me. What if he was heading towards me right now? What if I was in danger and needed to run?
Risking a single sideways glance, I spotted his gangly form standing listlessly between the wind turbines, his long arms gently swaying as his glowing red face bobbed to and fro.
I exhaled a sigh of relief, now that I knew he wasn’t chasing me. That relief didn’t even last a moment before it was transformed into a dangerous realization. He wasn’t just not chasing me; he wasn’t moving at all. He was still. This was rare, and it presented me with a rare opportunity. I could approach him. I could speak with him.
This wasn’t a good idea, and I knew it. The Effulgent One interacted with his followers on his terms. If I annoyed him, he could squash me like a bug. Or worse. Much worse. But he had marked me as his follower and I wanted to know why. If there was any chance I could get him to answer me, I was going to take it.
“Hey Lumi,” I said to the proprietary AI assistant in my company car. “Play the cover of I’m Always Chasing Rainbows from the Hazbin Hotel pilot.”
With the mood appropriately set, I veered east the first chance I got.
Almost immediately, I noticed that the highway seemed eerily abandoned. Even if anyone else had been capable of perceiving the Effulgent One, there was no one around to see him. I got this creeping sense that the closer I drew to him, I was actually shifting more and more out of my world and more and more into his. The wind picked up and dark clouds blew in, snuffing out the fading twilight and plunging everything into an overcast night.
The Effulgent One didn’t seem to notice me as I drew closer. He was as tall as the wind turbines he stood beside, his gaunt body plated in dull iridescent scales infected with trailing fungus. The head on his lanky neck was completely hollow and filled with a glowing red light that dimly bounced off his scales.
Seeing him standing still was a lot more surreal than seeing him when he was active. As impossibly large as he is, when he’s moving it just naturally triggers your fight or flight response and you don’t really have time to take it all in. But when he’s just standing there, and you can look at him and question what you’re seeing, it just hits differently.
It wasn’t until I started slowing down that he finally turned his head in my direction, briefly engulfing me in a blinding red light. When it passed, I saw that the Effulgent One had turned away from me and I was striding down the highway. Even though his gait was casual, his stride was so long that he was still moving as quickly as any vehicle.
Reasoning that if he didn’t want me to follow him he wouldn’t be walking along the road, I slammed my foot down on the accelerator pedal and sped after him.
That’s when things started to get weird.
You know how when you’re driving at night through the country, you can’t see anything beyond your own headlights? With no visual landmarks to go by, it’s easy to get disoriented. All you have to go by is the signs, and I wasn’t paying any attention to those. All my focus was on the Effulgent One, so much so that if someone had jumped out in front of me I probably would have killed them.
I turned down at least one sideroad in my pursuit of the Effulgent One. Maybe two or three. I’m really not sure. All I know for sure is that I was so desperate not to lose him that I had become completely lost myself.
He never looked back to see if I was still following, or gave any indication that he knew or cared if I was still there. He just made his way along the backroads, his bloodred searchlight sweeping back and forth all the while, as if he was desperately seeking something of grave importance. Finally, he abandoned the road altogether and began to climb a gently rolling hill with a solitary wind turbine on top of it. I gently slowed my car to a stop and watched to see what he would do.
I had barely been keeping up with him on the roadways, so I knew I’d never catch him going off-road. If he didn’t stop at the wind turbine, then that would be the end of my little misadventure. As I watched the Effulgent One climb up the hill and cast his light upon it, I saw that the structure at the summit wasn’t a wind turbine at all, but a windmill.
It was a mammoth windmill, the size of a wind turbine, made from enormous blocks of rugged black stone. It was as impossible as the Effulgent One himself. No stone structure other than a pyramid or ziggurat could possibly be that big, and the windmill barely tapered at all towards the top. Its blades were made from a ragged black cloth that reminded me of pirate sails, and near the top I could see a light coming from a single balcony.
When the Effulgent One reached the hill’s summit, he not only came to a stop but turned back around to face me, his light illuminating the entire hillside. Whether or not it was his intention to make it easier for me to follow him up the hill, it was nonetheless the effect, so I decided not to squander it.
Grabbing the thousand-lumen flashlight from my emergency kit, I left my car on the side of the road and began the short but challenging trek up the hill.
I honestly had no idea where I was at that point. Nothing looked familiar, and the overgrown grass seemed so alien in the red light. The way it moved in the wind was so fluid it looked more like seaweed than grass. The clouds overhead seemed equally otherworldly, moving not only unusually fast but in strange patterns that didn’t seem purely meteorological in nature.
With the Effulgent One’s light aimed directly at me, there was no doubt in my mind that he had seen me, but he still gave no indication that he cared. The closer I drew to him, the more I was confronted by his unfathomable scale. I really was an insect compared to him, and it seemed inconceivable that he would make any distinction between anthropods and arthropods. He could strike me down as effortlessly and carelessly as any other bothersome bug. I approached cautiously, watching intently for any sign of hostility from him, but he remained completely and utterly unmoved.
The closer I got to him, the harder I found it to press on. From a distance, the Effulgent One is surreal enough that he doesn’t completely shatter your sense of reality, but that’s a luxury that goes down the toilet when he’s only a few strides or less from stomping you into the ground. His emaciated form wasn’t merely skeletal, but elongated; his limbs, digits, and neck all stretched out to disquieting proportions. His dull scales now seemed to be a shimmering indigo, and the fungal growths between them pulsed rhythmically with some kind of life. Whether it was with his or theirs, I cannot say. There were no ears on his round head. No features at all aside from the frontwards-facing cavity that held the searing red light.
As I slowly and timidly approached the windmill, he remained by its side, peering out across the horizon. I turned to see what he was looking at, but saw nothing. I immediately turned back to him and craned my neck skywards, marvelling at him in dumbstruck awe. I’d chased him down so that I could demand why he had marked me as one of his followers, but now that I had succeeded, I was horrified by how suicidally naïve that plan now felt.
Many an internet atheist has pontificated about how if there were a God and if they ever met Him, they would remain every bit as irreverent and defiant and hold Him to account the same as any tyrant. But when faced with a being of unfathomable cosmic power, I don’t think there truly is anyone who wouldn’t lose their nerve.
So I just stood there, gaping up at the Effulgent One like a moron, with no idea of what to do next.
Fortunately for me, it was then that the Effulgent One finally acknowledged my presence.
Slowly, he turned his face downwards and cast his spotlight upon me, holding it there for a few long seconds before turning it to the door at the base of the windmill. I glanced up at the balcony above, and saw that it aligned almost perfectly with his head.
Evidently, he wanted to meet me face to face.
Nodding obediently, I raced to the heavy wooden door and pushed it open with all my might. The inside was dark, and I couldn’t see very well after standing right in the Effulgent One’s light, but I could hear the sounds of metal gears slowly grinding and clanking away. When I turned on my flashlight, the first thing I was able to make out was the enormous millstone. It moved slowly and steadily, squelching and squishing so that even in the poor light I knew that it wasn’t grain that was being milled.
The next thing I saw was a flight of rickety wooden stairs that snaked up all along the interior of the windmill. Each step creaked and groaned beneath my weight as I climbed them, but I nonetheless ascended them with reckless abandon. If a single one of them had given out beneath me, I could have fallen to my death, and the staircase shook back and forth so much that sometimes it felt as if it was intentionally trying to throw me off.
When I reached the top floor, I saw that the windshaft was encased in a crystalline sphere etched with leylines and strange symbols, and inside of it was some kind of complex clockwork apparatus that was powered by the spinning of the shaft. Though I was briefly curious as to the device’s purpose, it wasn’t what I had come up there for.
Turning myself towards the only door, I ran through and out onto the upper balcony. The Effulgent One was still standing just beside it, his head several times taller than I was. He looked out towards the horizon and pointed an outstretched arm in that direction, indicating that I should do the same.
From the balcony, I could see a spire made of purple volcanic glass, carved as if it was made of two intertwining gargantuan rose vines, with a stained-glass roof that made it look like a rose in full bloom. The spire was surrounded by many twisting and shifting shadows, and I could perceive a near infinitude of superimposed potential pathways branching out from the spire and stretching out across the planes.
The Effulgent One reached out and plucked at one of the pathways running over us like it was a harp string, sending vibrations down along to the spire and then back out through the entire network. I saw the sky above the spire shatter like glass, revealing a floating maelstrom of festering black fluid that had congealed into a thousand wailing faces. It began to descend as if it meant to devour the spire, but as it did so the spire pulled in the web of pathways around it like a net. The storm writhed and screamed as it tried to escape, but the spire held the net tight as a swarm of creatures too small for me to identify congregated upon the storm and began to feed upon it. But the fluid the maelstrom was composed of seemed to be corrosive, and the net began to rot beneath its influence. It sagged and it strained, until finally giving way.
A chaotic battle ensued between the spire and the maelstrom, but it hardly seemed to matter. What both I and the Efflugent One noticed the most was that the pathways that had been bound to the spire were now severed and stained by the Black Bile, drifting away wherever the wind took them.
The Effulgent One caught one of them in his hand and tugged it downwards, staring at it pensively for a long moment.
“That… that didn’t actually just happen, did it?” I asked meekly. I waited patiently for the Effulgent One to respond, but he just kept staring at the severed thread. “But… it’s going to happen? Or, it could happen?”
A slow and solemn nod confirmed that what he had shown me had portended to a possible future.
“That’s why you marked me as your follower then, isn’t it?” I asked. “You needed someone, someone other than the Virklitchen, someone who’s already involved in this bullshit and can help stop it from deteriorating into whatever the hell you just showed me. If Erich had picked anyone else to go to Virklitch that night, or hadn’t asked me to stay for the festival, it wouldn’t have been me! It didn’t have to have been me!”
His head remained somberly hung, and I hadn’t really been expecting him to respond at all to my outburst.
“Elifey liked you,” he said in a metallic, fluid voice that sounded like it was resonating out of his chest rather than his face. “I would not have chosen you if she hadn’t.”
He twirled the thread in between his fingers before gently handing it down to me like it was a streamer on a balloon. I hesitantly accepted the gesture, wrapping as much of my hand around the spectral cord as I could. The instant I touched it, a radiant and spiralling rainbow shot down its length and arced across the sky. When it reached the chaotic battle on the horizon, it dispelled the maelstrom on contact, banishing it back into the nether and signalling in biblical fashion that the storm had passed. The other wayward pathways were cleansed of the Black Bile as well, and I watched in amazement as they slowly started to reweave themselves back into an interconnected web.
“But… what does this mean? What do I actually have to do to make this a reality?” I asked.
The Effulgent One reached out his hand and pinched the cord, choking off the rainbow and ending the vision he had shown me.
“A reality?” he asked as he held his palm out flat and adjacent to the balcony. “It’s already a reality. All you need to do is make it yours.”
It seemed to me that I wasn’t likely to get anything less cryptic than that out of him, so I accepted the lift down. He took me down the hill and set me down gently beside my car before setting off out of sight and beyond my ability to pursue him.
Even though my GPS wasn’t working, the moment I was sitting in the driver’s seat the autopilot kicked in and didn’t ask me to take control until I was back on a familiar road. I know that windmill isn’t just a short drive away, and I’ll never see it again unless the Effulgent One wants me to. I don’t think I can say I’m exactly happy with how that turned out, but I suppose I accomplished what I set out to achieve. I know what the Effulgent One wants of me now, and why he chose me specifically. If it had been all his decision I think I’d still be feeling kind of torn about it, but knowing that I’ve been roped into this because of Elifey makes it a lot easier to bear.
And… I did actually manage to catch a rainbow. I just needed a giant’s help to reach it.

The United Nations' Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs) serve as a blueprint for achieving a better and more sustainable future for all. Adopted by all United Nations Member States in 2015, the 17 SDGs address global challenges including poverty, inequality, climate change, environmental degradation, peace, and justice. Among the numerous strategies to achieve these goals, tree planting stands out as a simple yet profoundly impactful action that intersects with multiple SDGs.

SDG 13: Climate Action

Forests act as crucial carbon sinks, absorbing carbon dioxide from the atmosphere and mitigating the effects of climate change. Tree planting helps in sequestering carbon, thereby reducing greenhouse gas concentrations. As young trees grow, they absorb CO2 at a higher rate, making reforestation and afforestation critical components in combating climate change. Projects like the Trillion Tree Campaign exemplify global efforts to harness the power of trees to reverse climate damage.

SDG 15: Life on Land

SDG 15 aims to protect, restore, and promote sustainable use of terrestrial ecosystems, sustainably manage forests, combat desertification, and halt and reverse land degradation and halt biodiversity loss. Tree planting directly supports this goal by restoring degraded lands, preventing soil erosion, and providing habitats for countless species. Trees are essential for maintaining the ecological balance and biodiversity necessary for sustaining life on Earth.

SDG 6: Clean Water and Sanitation

Forests play a critical role in the water cycle, influencing the quantity and quality of water available. Trees help in maintaining groundwater levels, preventing water runoff, and reducing the risk of floods. By planting trees, we can ensure healthier watersheds and more reliable water supplies, directly supporting SDG 6.

SDG 3: Good Health and Well-being

Trees contribute to human health in numerous ways. They improve air quality by filtering pollutants and providing oxygen. Urban greenery and forests offer spaces for recreation, mental health benefits, and opportunities for physical activity, which are essential for well-being. Moreover, trees provide medicinal resources that are vital for traditional and modern medicine, contributing to overall health.

SDG 11: Sustainable Cities and Communities

Urban areas are expanding, and with this expansion comes the need for sustainable city planning. Trees and urban forests enhance the livability of cities by providing shade, reducing urban heat island effects, and improving air quality. They also offer aesthetic and recreational benefits, making cities more attractive and enjoyable places to live. Tree planting initiatives in urban areas can significantly contribute to achieving SDG 11 by creating greener, more sustainable cities.

SDG 2: Zero Hunger

Agroforestry, the integration of trees and shrubs into agricultural systems, supports SDG 2 by enhancing food security and nutrition. Trees provide fruits, nuts, and other food products. They also improve soil fertility and provide shade and shelter for crops and livestock, leading to more resilient and productive farming systems. By incorporating trees into agriculture, we can create more sustainable and diversified food systems.

SDG 8: Decent Work and Economic Growth

Tree planting initiatives can stimulate local economies and create job opportunities. From planting and maintaining trees to managing forest resources and eco-tourism, these activities generate employment and support sustainable economic growth. Community-based forestry projects empower local communities and promote sustainable livelihoods, aligning with SDG 8.

Global Partnerships for the Goals

Achieving the SDGs requires global collaboration. Tree planting initiatives often bring together governments, NGOs, private companies, and local communities, fostering partnerships and collective action. Programs like the Bonn Challenge, which aims to restore 350 million hectares of deforested and degraded land by 2030, exemplify the power of international cooperation in achieving sustainable development.
Tree planting is a multifaceted action that contributes to numerous Sustainable Development Goals, illustrating its critical role in fostering a sustainable future. By recognizing and promoting the interconnected benefits of tree planting, we can make significant strides toward achieving the UN's ambitious goals. Whether through large-scale reforestation projects or individual efforts, planting trees is a powerful, tangible step toward a healthier, more equitable, and sustainable world.

Race Information

• Name: Tunnel Marathon
• Date: June 9, 2024
• Distance: 26.2 miles
• Location: North Bend, WA
• Website: tunnelmarathon.com
• Strava: https://www.strava.com/activities/11613716588
• Time: 2:56:50

Goals

Goal	Description	Completed?
A	Have fun	Yes
B	Sub 3:05	Yes

Splits

Mile	Time
1	7:17
2	7:33
3	7:07
4	6:39
5	6:56
6	6:45
7	6:47
8	6:40
9	6:46
10	6:46
11	6:49
12	6:38
13	6:52
14	6:46
15	6:41
16	6:46
17	6:42
18	6:48
19	6:47
20	6:47
21	6:49
22	6:49
23	6:41
24	6:29
25	6:31
26	6:25
27	5:51

Training

For background, I (36M) started running in 2020, set the goal of running 12 marathons in 2024 and have completed six so far: Houston (3:12), Surf City (3:14), Napa (3:11), LA (3:25), Eugene (3:06) and Ogden (3:06). Number seven would be the Tunnel Marathon.
After Ogden, I finally started to feel the cumulative effects of seven marathons in six months, dating back to CIM in December. It seemed like every lower body part that could ache was aching -- toes, arches, ankles, achilles and shins -- and recovery took longer than usual.
Even though my body was barking at me, I still felt like I was in good marathon shape, and metathon predicted a 3:06 one week out, which was close enough to a BQ time for me to decide to use the Tunnel Marathon to take a second crack at running under 3:05. With summer having arrived early in northern California, I also told myself that it would be my last PR-type effort for a few months at minimum.
During the three weeks between Ogden and Tunnel -- before beginning a 6-day taper -- I squeezed in one long run of 21 miles and a handful of medium long runs between 12 to 15 miles. My last quality session before the taper was a half-marathon, in which I set a PB of 1:28. While it may not have been the most sensible decision, it gave me a confidence boost that I might be able to hold 7-minute mile pace for a little more than three hours.

Pre-race

I flew into Seattle Friday morning and rented a car to drive to one of the race-affiliated hotels in Issaquah. The hotel was within walking distance to a Safeway where I picked up a box of uncrustables and several pints of ice cream since I have the palate of a toddler.
On Saturday morning, I stuck to my usual pre-marathon 4-mile run and ended up getting a bit carried away, logging two miles at sub-7-minute pace. Afterwards, I noshed on pasta, pizza and cookies until packet pick-up, which was held between 12pm-4pm at a local middle school parking lot. From the time I parked to the time I got my bib, not more than 5 minutes passed, which is the quickest bib pick-up I've experienced.
Race morning, I woke up at 3:15am, had coffee, did some light stretching and set off on a 40-minute drive to the start line at the Snoqualmie Pass. I didn't have an appetite but forced down a few mini graham crackers Southwest hands out during flights.
Over the past few marathons, I've lucked out on the weather, and this marathon continued that trend: low 50's with plenty of cloud cover at the start with highs in the 70's later in the day.

Race

After letting myself get sucked into the 3:05 pacer's race in Ogden, the phrase that kept swirling around in my head at the start area was "Run your race," which to a large extent meant start conservatively. To reinforce that approach, I ordered a pace band from findmymarathon and selected the very conservative start strategy, which had me aiming for between 7:10 to 7:20 per mile through the first three miles.
One of the appeals of the Tunnel Marathons is getting to run through a tunnel for a little over 2 miles, and this is where things got perilous. The terrain in the tunnel is straight out of Home Alone 2 with a litany of booby traps: uneven pavement, huge potholes, mud and puddles of water. Even though I and everyone around me had their head lamps on, someone a few feet in front of me took a nasty fall, and I rolled my ankle due to a pothole.
After making it out of the tunnel, I caught up to the 3-hour pace group, which is not something I've ever done before, and ran with them for about a mile. Due to the near disaster earlier, I decided to pass the 3-hour pace group so I could see the pavement in front of me, and this became one of my primary objectives for the remainder of the race.
And so, from mile 4 on, I was more or less on my own, occasionally passing an early start marathoner or having to dodge oncoming bike riders. I did make a point of taking in the scenery when crossing bridges, but as soon as gravel was underfoot again, I quickly turned my attention to the ground in front of me.
After coming through the half well under 1:30, I thought perhaps I was going too fast and needed to dial it back. I took inventory of how I was feeling, and the effort didn't feel particularly labored, so I just kept clipping off sub-6:50 miles (which feels bananas to write).
At mile 20, I took my fourth and final gel and allowed myself to entertain the thought of running under 3 hours. Given the struggles I've had in the last 5k of marathons, I told myself to take it one mile at a time. As I entered those final miles, my legs were feeling good, so I started to crank down the pace, dropping down into threshold pace for miles 24 through 26. Making the last turn and entering the final straightaway, I could vaguely see 2:50 something on the clock and gave one final push to the finish.

Post-race

After crossing the finish line, I was in disbelief. Not only did I run under 3:05, but I ran under 3 hours, which frankly is not something I ever thought was in the cards for me. A volunteer handed me a cold towel and cup of water, and I spent a few minutes soaking in the finish line area.
There was an interesting variety of treats, from potato chips to fresh fruit and slices of cake and mixed nuts, but I just grabbed a couple cans of coke and cartons of chocolate milk before hopping on a bus back to the start line.
At the risk of statng the obvious, the Tunnel Marathon is a very fast course, though the terrain does present some challenges. Certainly happy I got a chance to run this marathon and wouldn't hesitate recommending it to others.
Made with a new race report generator created by herumph.

When you were a kid, and you saw a rainbow, did you ever want to try to get to the end of it? I bet you did. I did, anyway. It wasn’t the mythical pot of gold that tempted me. Wealth was too abstract of a concept at that age to dream about, and leprechauns were creepy little bastards. I just wanted to see what the rainbow looked like up close, and maybe even try to climb it.
Of course, you can’t get to the end of a rainbow because not only is there no end, but there isn’t even really a rainbow. It’s an illusion caused by the sunlight passing through raindrops at the right angle. If you did try to chase a rainbow down, it would move with you until it faded away. That’s why chasing rainbows is a pretty good metaphor for pursuing a beautiful illusion that can never manifest as anything concrete.
I bring all this up because I think it was that same type of urge that compelled me to chase down the Effulgent One. It’s not a perfect analogy, however, considering that I did actually catch up to the eldritch bastard.
I first saw the Effulgent One a little over two years ago. My employer – who happens to be an occultist mad scientist by the name of Erich Thorne – had tasked me with returning a young girl named Elifey to her village on the northern edges of the county. The people of Virklitch Village are very nice, but they’re also an insular, Luddite cult who worship a colossal spectral entity they call the Effulgent One. I saw this Titan during my first visit to Virklitch, and more importantly, he saw me. He left a streak of black in my soul, marking me as one of his followers. I can feel him now, when he walks in our world. Sometimes, if I look towards the horizon after sundown, I can even see him.
This entity, and my connection to him, is understandably something my employer has taken an interest in. I’ve been to Virklitch many times since my first visit, and I’ve successfully collected a good deal of vital information about the Effulgent One. The Virklitchen are the only ones who know how to summon him, and coercing them into doing so would only earn us his wrath. He’s sworn to protect them, though I haven’t the slightest idea of what motivates him to do so.
Even though I can see him, I usually try not to look, to pretend he’s not there. The Virklitchen have warned me never to chase after him. Before Virklitch was founded, the First Nations people who lived in this region were aware of the Effulgent One, though they called him the Sky Strider. Any of them that went chasing after him either failed, went mad, or were never seen again.
I was out driving after sunset, during astronomical twilight when the trees are just black silhouettes against a burnt orange horizon, when I sensed the presence of the Effulgent One. He was to the east, towering along the darkening skyline, idling amidst the fields of cyclopean wind turbines. I could see their flashing red lights in the periphery of my vision, and I knew that one of those lights was him. I tried to fight the urge to look, but fear began to gnaw at me. What if he was heading towards me right now? What if I was in danger and needed to run?
Risking a single sideways glance, I spotted his gangly form standing listlessly between the wind turbines, his long arms gently swaying as his glowing red face bobbed to and fro.
I exhaled a sigh of relief, now that I knew he wasn’t chasing me. That relief didn’t even last a moment before it was transformed into a dangerous realization. He wasn’t just not chasing me; he wasn’t moving at all. He was still. This was rare, and it presented me with a rare opportunity. I could approach him. I could speak with him.
This wasn’t a good idea, and I knew it. The Effulgent One interacted with his followers on his terms. If I annoyed him, he could squash me like a bug. Or worse. Much worse. But he had marked me as his follower and I wanted to know why. If there was any chance I could get him to answer me, I was going to take it.
“Hey Lumi,” I said to the proprietary AI assistant in my company car. “Play the cover of I’m Always Chasing Rainbows from the Hazbin Hotel pilot.”
With the mood appropriately set, I veered east the first chance I got.
Almost immediately, I noticed that the highway seemed eerily abandoned. Even if anyone else had been capable of perceiving the Effulgent One, there was no one around to see him. I got this creeping sense that the closer I drew to him, I was actually shifting more and more out of my world and more and more into his. The wind picked up and dark clouds blew in, snuffing out the fading twilight and plunging everything into an overcast night.
The Effulgent One didn’t seem to notice me as I drew closer. He was as tall as the wind turbines he stood beside, his gaunt body plated in dull iridescent scales infected with trailing fungus. The head on his lanky neck was completely hollow and filled with a glowing red light that dimly bounced off his scales.
Seeing him standing still was a lot more surreal than seeing him when he was active. As impossibly large as he is, when he’s moving it just naturally triggers your fight or flight response and you don’t really have time to take it all in. But when he’s just standing there, and you can look at him and question what you’re seeing, it just hits differently.
It wasn’t until I started slowing down that he finally turned his head in my direction, briefly engulfing me in a blinding red light. When it passed, I saw that the Effulgent One had turned away from me and I was striding down the highway. Even though his gait was casual, his stride was so long that he was still moving as quickly as any vehicle.
Reasoning that if he didn’t want me to follow him he wouldn’t be walking along the road, I slammed my foot down on the accelerator pedal and sped after him.
That’s when things started to get weird.
You know how when you’re driving at night through the country, you can’t see anything beyond your own headlights? With no visual landmarks to go by, it’s easy to get disoriented. All you have to go by is the signs, and I wasn’t paying any attention to those. All my focus was on the Effulgent One, so much so that if someone had jumped out in front of me I probably would have killed them.
I turned down at least one sideroad in my pursuit of the Effulgent One. Maybe two or three. I’m really not sure. All I know for sure is that I was so desperate not to lose him that I had become completely lost myself.
He never looked back to see if I was still following, or gave any indication that he knew or cared if I was still there. He just made his way along the backroads, his bloodred searchlight sweeping back and forth all the while, as if he was desperately seeking something of grave importance. Finally, he abandoned the road altogether and began to climb a gently rolling hill with a solitary wind turbine on top of it. I gently slowed my car to a stop and watched to see what he would do.
I had barely been keeping up with him on the roadways, so I knew I’d never catch him going off-road. If he didn’t stop at the wind turbine, then that would be the end of my little misadventure. As I watched the Effulgent One climb up the hill and cast his light upon it, I saw that the structure at the summit wasn’t a wind turbine at all, but a windmill.
It was a mammoth windmill, the size of a wind turbine, made from enormous blocks of rugged black stone. It was as impossible as the Effulgent One himself. No stone structure other than a pyramid or ziggurat could possibly be that big, and the windmill barely tapered at all towards the top. Its blades were made from a ragged black cloth that reminded me of pirate sails, and near the top I could see a light coming from a single balcony.
When the Effulgent One reached the hill’s summit, he not only came to a stop but turned back around to face me, his light illuminating the entire hillside. Whether or not it was his intention to make it easier for me to follow him up the hill, it was nonetheless the effect, so I decided not to squander it.
Grabbing the thousand-lumen flashlight from my emergency kit, I left my car on the side of the road and began the short but challenging trek up the hill.
I honestly had no idea where I was at that point. Nothing looked familiar, and the overgrown grass seemed so alien in the red light. The way it moved in the wind was so fluid it looked more like seaweed than grass. The clouds overhead seemed equally otherworldly, moving not only unusually fast but in strange patterns that didn’t seem purely meteorological in nature.
With the Effulgent One’s light aimed directly at me, there was no doubt in my mind that he had seen me, but he still gave no indication that he cared. The closer I drew to him, the more I was confronted by his unfathomable scale. I really was an insect compared to him, and it seemed inconceivable that he would make any distinction between anthropods and arthropods. He could strike me down as effortlessly and carelessly as any other bothersome bug. I approached cautiously, watching intently for any sign of hostility from him, but he remained completely and utterly unmoved.
The closer I got to him, the harder I found it to press on. From a distance, the Effulgent One is surreal enough that he doesn’t completely shatter your sense of reality, but that’s a luxury that goes down the toilet when he’s only a few strides or less from stomping you into the ground. His emaciated form wasn’t merely skeletal, but elongated; his limbs, digits, and neck all stretched out to disquieting proportions. His dull scales now seemed to be a shimmering indigo, and the fungal growths between them pulsed rhythmically with some kind of life. Whether it was with his or theirs, I cannot say. There were no ears on his round head. No features at all aside from the frontwards-facing cavity that held the searing red light.
As I slowly and timidly approached the windmill, he remained by its side, peering out across the horizon. I turned to see what he was looking at, but saw nothing. I immediately turned back to him and craned my neck skywards, marvelling at him in dumbstruck awe. I’d chased him down so that I could demand why he had marked me as one of his followers, but now that I had succeeded, I was horrified by how suicidally naïve that plan now felt.
Many an internet atheist has pontificated about how if there were a God and if they ever met Him, they would remain every bit as irreverent and defiant and hold Him to account the same as any tyrant. But when faced with a being of unfathomable cosmic power, I don’t think there truly is anyone who wouldn’t lose their nerve.
So I just stood there, gaping up at the Effulgent One like a moron, with no idea of what to do next.
Fortunately for me, it was then that the Effulgent One finally acknowledged my presence.
Slowly, he turned his face downwards and cast his spotlight upon me, holding it there for a few long seconds before turning it to the door at the base of the windmill. I glanced up at the balcony above, and saw that it aligned almost perfectly with his head.
Evidently, he wanted to meet me face to face.
Nodding obediently, I raced to the heavy wooden door and pushed it open with all my might. The inside was dark, and I couldn’t see very well after standing right in the Effulgent One’s light, but I could hear the sounds of metal gears slowly grinding and clanking away. When I turned on my flashlight, the first thing I was able to make out was the enormous millstone. It moved slowly and steadily, squelching and squishing so that even in the poor light I knew that it wasn’t grain that was being milled.
The next thing I saw was a flight of rickety wooden stairs that snaked up all along the interior of the windmill. Each step creaked and groaned beneath my weight as I climbed them, but I nonetheless ascended them with reckless abandon. If a single one of them had given out beneath me, I could have fallen to my death, and the staircase shook back and forth so much that sometimes it felt as if it was intentionally trying to throw me off.
When I reached the top floor, I saw that the windshaft was encased in a crystalline sphere etched with leylines and strange symbols, and inside of it was some kind of complex clockwork apparatus that was powered by the spinning of the shaft. Though I was briefly curious as to the device’s purpose, it wasn’t what I had come up there for.
Turning myself towards the only door, I ran through and out onto the upper balcony. The Effulgent One was still standing just beside it, his head several times taller than I was. He looked out towards the horizon and pointed an outstretched arm in that direction, indicating that I should do the same.
From the balcony, I could see a spire made of purple volcanic glass, carved as if it was made of two intertwining gargantuan rose vines, with a stained-glass roof that made it look like a rose in full bloom. The spire was surrounded by many twisting and shifting shadows, and I could perceive a near infinitude of superimposed potential pathways branching out from the spire and stretching out across the planes.
The Effulgent One reached out and plucked at one of the pathways running over us like it was a harp string, sending vibrations down along to the spire and then back out through the entire network. I saw the sky above the spire shatter like glass, revealing a floating maelstrom of festering black fluid that had congealed into a thousand wailing faces. It began to descend as if it meant to devour the spire, but as it did so the spire pulled in the web of pathways around it like a net. The storm writhed and screamed as it tried to escape, but the spire held the net tight as a swarm of creatures too small for me to identify congregated upon the storm and began to feed upon it. But the fluid the maelstrom was composed of seemed to be corrosive, and the net began to rot beneath its influence. It sagged and it strained, until finally giving way.
A chaotic battle ensued between the spire and the maelstrom, but it hardly seemed to matter. What both I and the Efflugent One noticed the most was that the pathways that had been bound to the spire were now severed and stained by the Black Bile, drifting away wherever the wind took them.
The Effulgent One caught one of them in his hand and tugged it downwards, staring at it pensively for a long moment.
“That… that didn’t actually just happen, did it?” I asked meekly. I waited patiently for the Effulgent One to respond, but he just kept staring at the severed thread. “But… it’s going to happen? Or, it could happen?”
A slow and solemn nod confirmed that what he had shown me had portended to a possible future.
“That’s why you marked me as your follower then, isn’t it?” I asked. “You needed someone, someone other than the Virklitchen, someone who’s already involved in this bullshit and can help stop it from deteriorating into whatever the hell you just showed me. If Erich had picked anyone else to go to Virklitch that night, or hadn’t asked me to stay for the festival, it wouldn’t have been me! It didn’t have to have been me!”
His head remained somberly hung, and I hadn’t really been expecting him to respond at all to my outburst.
“Elifey liked you,” he said in a metallic, fluid voice that sounded like it was resonating out of his chest rather than his face. “I would not have chosen you if she hadn’t.”
He twirled the thread in between his fingers before gently handing it down to me like it was a streamer on a balloon. I hesitantly accepted the gesture, wrapping as much of my hand around the spectral cord as I could. The instant I touched it, a radiant and spiralling rainbow shot down its length and arced across the sky. When it reached the chaotic battle on the horizon, it dispelled the maelstrom on contact, banishing it back into the nether and signalling in biblical fashion that the storm had passed. The other wayward pathways were cleansed of the Black Bile as well, and I watched in amazement as they slowly started to reweave themselves back into an interconnected web.
“But… what does this mean? What do I actually have to do to make this a reality?” I asked.
The Effulgent One reached out his hand and pinched the cord, choking off the rainbow and ending the vision he had shown me.
“A reality?” he asked as he held his palm out flat and adjacent to the balcony. “It’s already a reality. All you need to do is make it yours.”
It seemed to me that I wasn’t likely to get anything less cryptic than that out of him, so I accepted the lift down. He took me down the hill and set me down gently beside my car before setting off out of sight and beyond my ability to pursue him.
Even though my GPS wasn’t working, the moment I was sitting in the driver’s seat the autopilot kicked in and didn’t ask me to take control until I was back on a familiar road. I know that windmill isn’t just a short drive away, and I’ll never see it again unless the Effulgent One wants me to. I don’t think I can say I’m exactly happy with how that turned out, but I suppose I accomplished what I set out to achieve. I know what the Effulgent One wants of me now, and why he chose me specifically. If it had been all his decision I think I’d still be feeling kind of torn about it, but knowing that I’ve been roped into this because of Elifey makes it a lot easier to bear.
And… I did actually manage to catch a rainbow. I just needed a giant’s help to reach it.

In 2024, all the world's major cultures and societies are sexually and amorously repressed. Their very shape seems designed for this; they simply cannot fit large quantities of love without being destroyed. This is why the average person more often than not is frustrated and disappointed by the dating scene, why so many of us are lonely. We were born into this.
Those who are successful in these matters tend not to be average: they got rich; they learned how to become very, very popular; they made a positive difference in the lives of people. Whatever it was, it made them stand out—it changed the game—though not on enough of a major scale to change it for the rest of us. The rest of us are at a loss.
Whether you're traditional or not, want one lover or ten lovers, chances are that you're frustrated. You're looking up dating advice and setting boundaries and making rules and going to therapy but nothing seems to work, and if and when you finally find someone it usually comes at the cost of something, a piece of you you sacrificed down the road to get here. Later on you find out it wasn't worth it.
So what do we do about this? Well you see, I'm not a dating coach and this isn't that kind of post. I'm not going to tell you what to do. In fact, I think the root problem with the state of modern love is our belief that there is any problem to begin with. To put it in another way, we are concerned with what we will get back for our efforts. We tie ourselves up in knots over this, but have we never heard that "It is more blessed to give than to receive?"
You see, our societies and cultures are amorously repressed, but that is our fault, your fault, my fault. You are the one plugging up the pipeline. The flow of love is within each one of us, it is abundant, and it is perfectly within our power to allow that love to find expression or not. If you will recall from deep within yourself the spiritual agreement to this life, you will remember that it includes free will for all beings. To break this agreement is to fall from grace, to become fearful, to worry whether anyone will ever love you.
Well you worried for nothing, because I do love you.

In 2024, all the world's major cultures and societies are sexually and amorously repressed. Their very shape seems designed for this; they simply cannot fit large quantities of love without being destroyed. This is why the average person more often than not is frustrated and disappointed by the dating scene, why so many of us are lonely. We were born into this.
Those who are successful in these matters tend not to be average: they got rich; they learned how to become very, very popular; they made a positive difference in the lives of people. Whatever it was, it made them stand out—it changed the game—though not on enough of a major scale to change it for the rest of us. The rest of us are at a loss.
Whether you're traditional or not, want one lover or ten lovers, chances are that you're frustrated. You're looking up dating advice and setting boundaries and making rules and going to therapy but nothing seems to work, and if and when you finally find someone it usually comes at the cost of something, a piece of you you sacrificed down the road to get here. Later on you find out it wasn't worth it.
So what do we do about this? Well you see, I'm not a dating coach and this isn't that kind of post. I'm not going to tell you what to do. In fact, I think the root problem with the state of modern love is our belief that there is any problem to begin with. To put it in another way, we are concerned with what we will get back for our efforts. We tie ourselves up in knots over this, but have we never heard that "It is more blessed to give than to receive?"
You see, our societies and cultures are amorously repressed, but that is our fault, your fault, my fault. You are the one plugging up the pipeline. The flow of love is within each one of us, it is abundant, and it is perfectly within our power to allow that love to find expression or not. If you will recall from deep within yourself the spiritual agreement to this life, you will remember that it includes free will for all beings. To break this agreement is to fall from grace, to become fearful, to worry whether anyone will ever love you.
Well you worried for nothing, because I do love you.

When you were a kid, and you saw a rainbow, did you ever want to try to get to the end of it? I bet you did. I did, anyway. It wasn’t the mythical pot of gold that tempted me. Wealth was too abstract of a concept at that age to dream about, and leprechauns were creepy little bastards. I just wanted to see what the rainbow looked like up close, and maybe even try to climb it.
Of course, you can’t get to the end of a rainbow because not only is there no end, but there isn’t even really a rainbow. It’s an illusion caused by the sunlight passing through raindrops at the right angle. If you did try to chase a rainbow down, it would move with you until it faded away. That’s why chasing rainbows is a pretty good metaphor for pursuing a beautiful illusion that can never manifest as anything concrete.
I bring all this up because I think it was that same type of urge that compelled me to chase down the Effulgent One. It’s not a perfect analogy, however, considering that I did actually catch up to the eldritch bastard.
I first saw the Effulgent One a little over two years ago. My employer – who happens to be an occultist mad scientist by the name of Erich Thorne – had tasked me with returning a young girl named Elifey to her village on the northern edges of the county. The people of Virklitch Village are very nice, but they’re also an insular, Luddite cult who worship a colossal spectral entity they call the Effulgent One. I saw this Titan during my first visit to Virklitch, and more importantly, he saw me. He left a streak of black in my soul, marking me as one of his followers. I can feel him now, when he walks in our world. Sometimes, if I look towards the horizon after sundown, I can even see him.
This entity, and my connection to him, is understandably something my employer has taken an interest in. I’ve been to Virklitch many times since my first visit, and I’ve successfully collected a good deal of vital information about the Effulgent One. The Virklitchen are the only ones who know how to summon him, and coercing them into doing so would only earn us his wrath. He’s sworn to protect them, though I haven’t the slightest idea of what motivates him to do so.
Even though I can see him, I usually try not to look, to pretend he’s not there. The Virklitchen have warned me never to chase after him. Before Virklitch was founded, the First Nations people who lived in this region were aware of the Effulgent One, though they called him the Sky Strider. Any of them that went chasing after him either failed, went mad, or were never seen again.
I was out driving after sunset, during astronomical twilight when the trees are just black silhouettes against a burnt orange horizon, when I sensed the presence of the Effulgent One. He was to the east, towering along the darkening skyline, idling amidst the fields of cyclopean wind turbines. I could see their flashing red lights in the periphery of my vision, and I knew that one of those lights was him. I tried to fight the urge to look, but fear began to gnaw at me. What if he was heading towards me right now? What if I was in danger and needed to run?
Risking a single sideways glance, I spotted his gangly form standing listlessly between the wind turbines, his long arms gently swaying as his glowing red face bobbed to and fro.
I exhaled a sigh of relief, now that I knew he wasn’t chasing me. That relief didn’t even last a moment before it was transformed into a dangerous realization. He wasn’t just not chasing me; he wasn’t moving at all. He was still. This was rare, and it presented me with a rare opportunity. I could approach him. I could speak with him.
This wasn’t a good idea, and I knew it. The Effulgent One interacted with his followers on his terms. If I annoyed him, he could squash me like a bug. Or worse. Much worse. But he had marked me as his follower and I wanted to know why. If there was any chance I could get him to answer me, I was going to take it.
“Hey Lumi,” I said to the proprietary AI assistant in my company car. “Play the cover of I’m Always Chasing Rainbows from the Hazbin Hotel pilot.”
With the mood appropriately set, I veered east the first chance I got.
Almost immediately, I noticed that the highway seemed eerily abandoned. Even if anyone else had been capable of perceiving the Effulgent One, there was no one around to see him. I got this creeping sense that the closer I drew to him, I was actually shifting more and more out of my world and more and more into his. The wind picked up and dark clouds blew in, snuffing out the fading twilight and plunging everything into an overcast night.
The Effulgent One didn’t seem to notice me as I drew closer. He was as tall as the wind turbines he stood beside, his gaunt body plated in dull iridescent scales infected with trailing fungus. The head on his lanky neck was completely hollow and filled with a glowing red light that dimly bounced off his scales.
Seeing him standing still was a lot more surreal than seeing him when he was active. As impossibly large as he is, when he’s moving it just naturally triggers your fight or flight response and you don’t really have time to take it all in. But when he’s just standing there, and you can look at him and question what you’re seeing, it just hits differently.
It wasn’t until I started slowing down that he finally turned his head in my direction, briefly engulfing me in a blinding red light. When it passed, I saw that the Effulgent One had turned away from me and I was striding down the highway. Even though his gait was casual, his stride was so long that he was still moving as quickly as any vehicle.
Reasoning that if he didn’t want me to follow him he wouldn’t be walking along the road, I slammed my foot down on the accelerator pedal and sped after him.
That’s when things started to get weird.
You know how when you’re driving at night through the country, you can’t see anything beyond your own headlights? With no visual landmarks to go by, it’s easy to get disoriented. All you have to go by is the signs, and I wasn’t paying any attention to those. All my focus was on the Effulgent One, so much so that if someone had jumped out in front of me I probably would have killed them.
I turned down at least one sideroad in my pursuit of the Effulgent One. Maybe two or three. I’m really not sure. All I know for sure is that I was so desperate not to lose him that I had become completely lost myself.
He never looked back to see if I was still following, or gave any indication that he knew or cared if I was still there. He just made his way along the backroads, his bloodred searchlight sweeping back and forth all the while, as if he was desperately seeking something of grave importance. Finally, he abandoned the road altogether and began to climb a gently rolling hill with a solitary wind turbine on top of it. I gently slowed my car to a stop and watched to see what he would do.
I had barely been keeping up with him on the roadways, so I knew I’d never catch him going off-road. If he didn’t stop at the wind turbine, then that would be the end of my little misadventure. As I watched the Effulgent One climb up the hill and cast his light upon it, I saw that the structure at the summit wasn’t a wind turbine at all, but a windmill.
It was a mammoth windmill, the size of a wind turbine, made from enormous blocks of rugged black stone. It was as impossible as the Effulgent One himself. No stone structure other than a pyramid or ziggurat could possibly be that big, and the windmill barely tapered at all towards the top. Its blades were made from a ragged black cloth that reminded me of pirate sails, and near the top I could see a light coming from a single balcony.
When the Effulgent One reached the hill’s summit, he not only came to a stop but turned back around to face me, his light illuminating the entire hillside. Whether or not it was his intention to make it easier for me to follow him up the hill, it was nonetheless the effect, so I decided not to squander it.
Grabbing the thousand-lumen flashlight from my emergency kit, I left my car on the side of the road and began the short but challenging trek up the hill.
I honestly had no idea where I was at that point. Nothing looked familiar, and the overgrown grass seemed so alien in the red light. The way it moved in the wind was so fluid it looked more like seaweed than grass. The clouds overhead seemed equally otherworldly, moving not only unusually fast but in strange patterns that didn’t seem purely meteorological in nature.
With the Effulgent One’s light aimed directly at me, there was no doubt in my mind that he had seen me, but he still gave no indication that he cared. The closer I drew to him, the more I was confronted by his unfathomable scale. I really was an insect compared to him, and it seemed inconceivable that he would make any distinction between anthropods and arthropods. He could strike me down as effortlessly and carelessly as any other bothersome bug. I approached cautiously, watching intently for any sign of hostility from him, but he remained completely and utterly unmoved.
The closer I got to him, the harder I found it to press on. From a distance, the Effulgent One is surreal enough that he doesn’t completely shatter your sense of reality, but that’s a luxury that goes down the toilet when he’s only a few strides or less from stomping you into the ground. His emaciated form wasn’t merely skeletal, but elongated; his limbs, digits, and neck all stretched out to disquieting proportions. His dull scales now seemed to be a shimmering indigo, and the fungal growths between them pulsed rhythmically with some kind of life. Whether it was with his or theirs, I cannot say. There were no ears on his round head. No features at all aside from the frontwards-facing cavity that held the searing red light.
As I slowly and timidly approached the windmill, he remained by its side, peering out across the horizon. I turned to see what he was looking at, but saw nothing. I immediately turned back to him and craned my neck skywards, marvelling at him in dumbstruck awe. I’d chased him down so that I could demand why he had marked me as one of his followers, but now that I had succeeded, I was horrified by how suicidally naïve that plan now felt.
Many an internet atheist has pontificated about how if there were a God and if they ever met Him, they would remain every bit as irreverent and defiant and hold Him to account the same as any tyrant. But when faced with a being of unfathomable cosmic power, I don’t think there truly is anyone who wouldn’t lose their nerve.
So I just stood there, gaping up at the Effulgent One like a moron, with no idea of what to do next.
Fortunately for me, it was then that the Effulgent One finally acknowledged my presence.
Slowly, he turned his face downwards and cast his spotlight upon me, holding it there for a few long seconds before turning it to the door at the base of the windmill. I glanced up at the balcony above, and saw that it aligned almost perfectly with his head.
Evidently, he wanted to meet me face to face.
Nodding obediently, I raced to the heavy wooden door and pushed it open with all my might. The inside was dark, and I couldn’t see very well after standing right in the Effulgent One’s light, but I could hear the sounds of metal gears slowly grinding and clanking away. When I turned on my flashlight, the first thing I was able to make out was the enormous millstone. It moved slowly and steadily, squelching and squishing so that even in the poor light I knew that it wasn’t grain that was being milled.
The next thing I saw was a flight of rickety wooden stairs that snaked up all along the interior of the windmill. Each step creaked and groaned beneath my weight as I climbed them, but I nonetheless ascended them with reckless abandon. If a single one of them had given out beneath me, I could have fallen to my death, and the staircase shook back and forth so much that sometimes it felt as if it was intentionally trying to throw me off.
When I reached the top floor, I saw that the windshaft was encased in a crystalline sphere etched with leylines and strange symbols, and inside of it was some kind of complex clockwork apparatus that was powered by the spinning of the shaft. Though I was briefly curious as to the device’s purpose, it wasn’t what I had come up there for.
Turning myself towards the only door, I ran through and out onto the upper balcony. The Effulgent One was still standing just beside it, his head several times taller than I was. He looked out towards the horizon and pointed an outstretched arm in that direction, indicating that I should do the same.
From the balcony, I could see a spire made of purple volcanic glass, carved as if it was made of two intertwining gargantuan rose vines, with a stained-glass roof that made it look like a rose in full bloom. The spire was surrounded by many twisting and shifting shadows, and I could perceive a near infinitude of superimposed potential pathways branching out from the spire and stretching out across the planes.
The Effulgent One reached out and plucked at one of the pathways running over us like it was a harp string, sending vibrations down along to the spire and then back out through the entire network. I saw the sky above the spire shatter like glass, revealing a floating maelstrom of festering black fluid that had congealed into a thousand wailing faces. It began to descend as if it meant to devour the spire, but as it did so the spire pulled in the web of pathways around it like a net. The storm writhed and screamed as it tried to escape, but the spire held the net tight as a swarm of creatures too small for me to identify congregated upon the storm and began to feed upon it. But the fluid the maelstrom was composed of seemed to be corrosive, and the net began to rot beneath its influence. It sagged and it strained, until finally giving way.
A chaotic battle ensued between the spire and the maelstrom, but it hardly seemed to matter. What both I and the Efflugent One noticed the most was that the pathways that had been bound to the spire were now severed and stained by the Black Bile, drifting away wherever the wind took them.
The Effulgent One caught one of them in his hand and tugged it downwards, staring at it pensively for a long moment.
“That… that didn’t actually just happen, did it?” I asked meekly. I waited patiently for the Effulgent One to respond, but he just kept staring at the severed thread. “But… it’s going to happen? Or, it could happen?”
A slow and solemn nod confirmed that what he had shown me had portended to a possible future.
“That’s why you marked me as your follower then, isn’t it?” I asked. “You needed someone, someone other than the Virklitchen, someone who’s already involved in this bullshit and can help stop it from deteriorating into whatever the hell you just showed me. If Erich had picked anyone else to go to Virklitch that night, or hadn’t asked me to stay for the festival, it wouldn’t have been me! It didn’t have to have been me!”
His head remained somberly hung, and I hadn’t really been expecting him to respond at all to my outburst.
“Elifey liked you,” he said in a metallic, fluid voice that sounded like it was resonating out of his chest rather than his face. “I would not have chosen you if she hadn’t.”
He twirled the thread in between his fingers before gently handing it down to me like it was a streamer on a balloon. I hesitantly accepted the gesture, wrapping as much of my hand around the spectral cord as I could. The instant I touched it, a radiant and spiralling rainbow shot down its length and arced across the sky. When it reached the chaotic battle on the horizon, it dispelled the maelstrom on contact, banishing it back into the nether and signalling in biblical fashion that the storm had passed. The other wayward pathways were cleansed of the Black Bile as well, and I watched in amazement as they slowly started to reweave themselves back into an interconnected web.
“But… what does this mean? What do I actually have to do to make this a reality?” I asked.
The Effulgent One reached out his hand and pinched the cord, choking off the rainbow and ending the vision he had shown me.
“A reality?” he asked as he held his palm out flat and adjacent to the balcony. “It’s already a reality. All you need to do is make it yours.”
It seemed to me that I wasn’t likely to get anything less cryptic than that out of him, so I accepted the lift down. He took me down the hill and set me down gently beside my car before setting off out of sight and beyond my ability to pursue him.
Even though my GPS wasn’t working, the moment I was sitting in the driver’s seat the autopilot kicked in and didn’t ask me to take control until I was back on a familiar road. I know that windmill isn’t just a short drive away, and I’ll never see it again unless the Effulgent One wants me to. I don’t think I can say I’m exactly happy with how that turned out, but I suppose I accomplished what I set out to achieve. I know what the Effulgent One wants of me now, and why he chose me specifically. If it had been all his decision I think I’d still be feeling kind of torn about it, but knowing that I’ve been roped into this because of Elifey makes it a lot easier to bear.
And… I did actually manage to catch a rainbow. I just needed a giant’s help to reach it.

When you were a kid, and you saw a rainbow, did you ever want to try to get to the end of it? I bet you did. I did, anyway. It wasn’t the mythical pot of gold that tempted me. Wealth was too abstract of a concept at that age to dream about, and leprechauns were creepy little bastards. I just wanted to see what the rainbow looked like up close, and maybe even try to climb it.
Of course, you can’t get to the end of a rainbow because not only is there no end, but there isn’t even really a rainbow. It’s an illusion caused by the sunlight passing through raindrops at the right angle. If you did try to chase a rainbow down, it would move with you until it faded away. That’s why chasing rainbows is a pretty good metaphor for pursuing a beautiful illusion that can never manifest as anything concrete.
I bring all this up because I think it was that same type of urge that compelled me to chase down the Effulgent One. It’s not a perfect analogy, however, considering that I did actually catch up to the eldritch bastard.
I first saw the Effulgent One a little over two years ago. My employer – who happens to be an occultist mad scientist by the name of Erich Thorne – had tasked me with returning a young girl named Elifey to her village on the northern edges of the county. The people of Virklitch Village are very nice, but they’re also an insular, Luddite cult who worship a colossal spectral entity they call the Effulgent One. I saw this Titan during my first visit to Virklitch, and more importantly, he saw me. He left a streak of black in my soul, marking me as one of his followers. I can feel him now, when he walks in our world. Sometimes, if I look towards the horizon after sundown, I can even see him.
This entity, and my connection to him, is understandably something my employer has taken an interest in. I’ve been to Virklitch many times since my first visit, and I’ve successfully collected a good deal of vital information about the Effulgent One. The Virklitchen are the only ones who know how to summon him, and coercing them into doing so would only earn us his wrath. He’s sworn to protect them, though I haven’t the slightest idea of what motivates him to do so.
Even though I can see him, I usually try not to look, to pretend he’s not there. The Virklitchen have warned me never to chase after him. Before Virklitch was founded, the First Nations people who lived in this region were aware of the Effulgent One, though they called him the Sky Strider. Any of them that went chasing after him either failed, went mad, or were never seen again.
I was out driving after sunset, during astronomical twilight when the trees are just black silhouettes against a burnt orange horizon, when I sensed the presence of the Effulgent One. He was to the east, towering along the darkening skyline, idling amidst the fields of cyclopean wind turbines. I could see their flashing red lights in the periphery of my vision, and I knew that one of those lights was him. I tried to fight the urge to look, but fear began to gnaw at me. What if he was heading towards me right now? What if I was in danger and needed to run?
Risking a single sideways glance, I spotted his gangly form standing listlessly between the wind turbines, his long arms gently swaying as his glowing red face bobbed to and fro.
I exhaled a sigh of relief, now that I knew he wasn’t chasing me. That relief didn’t even last a moment before it was transformed into a dangerous realization. He wasn’t just not chasing me; he wasn’t moving at all. He was still. This was rare, and it presented me with a rare opportunity. I could approach him. I could speak with him.
This wasn’t a good idea, and I knew it. The Effulgent One interacted with his followers on his terms. If I annoyed him, he could squash me like a bug. Or worse. Much worse. But he had marked me as his follower and I wanted to know why. If there was any chance I could get him to answer me, I was going to take it.
“Hey Lumi,” I said to the proprietary AI assistant in my company car. “Play the cover of I’m Always Chasing Rainbows from the Hazbin Hotel pilot.”
With the mood appropriately set, I veered east the first chance I got.
Almost immediately, I noticed that the highway seemed eerily abandoned. Even if anyone else had been capable of perceiving the Effulgent One, there was no one around to see him. I got this creeping sense that the closer I drew to him, I was actually shifting more and more out of my world and more and more into his. The wind picked up and dark clouds blew in, snuffing out the fading twilight and plunging everything into an overcast night.
The Effulgent One didn’t seem to notice me as I drew closer. He was as tall as the wind turbines he stood beside, his gaunt body plated in dull iridescent scales infected with trailing fungus. The head on his lanky neck was completely hollow and filled with a glowing red light that dimly bounced off his scales.
Seeing him standing still was a lot more surreal than seeing him when he was active. As impossibly large as he is, when he’s moving it just naturally triggers your fight or flight response and you don’t really have time to take it all in. But when he’s just standing there, and you can look at him and question what you’re seeing, it just hits differently.
It wasn’t until I started slowing down that he finally turned his head in my direction, briefly engulfing me in a blinding red light. When it passed, I saw that the Effulgent One had turned away from me and I was striding down the highway. Even though his gait was casual, his stride was so long that he was still moving as quickly as any vehicle.
Reasoning that if he didn’t want me to follow him he wouldn’t be walking along the road, I slammed my foot down on the accelerator pedal and sped after him.
That’s when things started to get weird.
You know how when you’re driving at night through the country, you can’t see anything beyond your own headlights? With no visual landmarks to go by, it’s easy to get disoriented. All you have to go by is the signs, and I wasn’t paying any attention to those. All my focus was on the Effulgent One, so much so that if someone had jumped out in front of me I probably would have killed them.
I turned down at least one sideroad in my pursuit of the Effulgent One. Maybe two or three. I’m really not sure. All I know for sure is that I was so desperate not to lose him that I had become completely lost myself.
He never looked back to see if I was still following, or gave any indication that he knew or cared if I was still there. He just made his way along the backroads, his bloodred searchlight sweeping back and forth all the while, as if he was desperately seeking something of grave importance. Finally, he abandoned the road altogether and began to climb a gently rolling hill with a solitary wind turbine on top of it. I gently slowed my car to a stop and watched to see what he would do.
I had barely been keeping up with him on the roadways, so I knew I’d never catch him going off-road. If he didn’t stop at the wind turbine, then that would be the end of my little misadventure. As I watched the Effulgent One climb up the hill and cast his light upon it, I saw that the structure at the summit wasn’t a wind turbine at all, but a windmill.
It was a mammoth windmill, the size of a wind turbine, made from enormous blocks of rugged black stone. It was as impossible as the Effulgent One himself. No stone structure other than a pyramid or ziggurat could possibly be that big, and the windmill barely tapered at all towards the top. Its blades were made from a ragged black cloth that reminded me of pirate sails, and near the top I could see a light coming from a single balcony.
When the Effulgent One reached the hill’s summit, he not only came to a stop but turned back around to face me, his light illuminating the entire hillside. Whether or not it was his intention to make it easier for me to follow him up the hill, it was nonetheless the effect, so I decided not to squander it.
Grabbing the thousand-lumen flashlight from my emergency kit, I left my car on the side of the road and began the short but challenging trek up the hill.
I honestly had no idea where I was at that point. Nothing looked familiar, and the overgrown grass seemed so alien in the red light. The way it moved in the wind was so fluid it looked more like seaweed than grass. The clouds overhead seemed equally otherworldly, moving not only unusually fast but in strange patterns that didn’t seem purely meteorological in nature.
With the Effulgent One’s light aimed directly at me, there was no doubt in my mind that he had seen me, but he still gave no indication that he cared. The closer I drew to him, the more I was confronted by his unfathomable scale. I really was an insect compared to him, and it seemed inconceivable that he would make any distinction between anthropods and arthropods. He could strike me down as effortlessly and carelessly as any other bothersome bug. I approached cautiously, watching intently for any sign of hostility from him, but he remained completely and utterly unmoved.
The closer I got to him, the harder I found it to press on. From a distance, the Effulgent One is surreal enough that he doesn’t completely shatter your sense of reality, but that’s a luxury that goes down the toilet when he’s only a few strides or less from stomping you into the ground. His emaciated form wasn’t merely skeletal, but elongated; his limbs, digits, and neck all stretched out to disquieting proportions. His dull scales now seemed to be a shimmering indigo, and the fungal growths between them pulsed rhythmically with some kind of life. Whether it was with his or theirs, I cannot say. There were no ears on his round head. No features at all aside from the frontwards-facing cavity that held the searing red light.
As I slowly and timidly approached the windmill, he remained by its side, peering out across the horizon. I turned to see what he was looking at, but saw nothing. I immediately turned back to him and craned my neck skywards, marvelling at him in dumbstruck awe. I’d chased him down so that I could demand why he had marked me as one of his followers, but now that I had succeeded, I was horrified by how suicidally naïve that plan now felt.
Many an internet atheist has pontificated about how if there were a God and if they ever met Him, they would remain every bit as irreverent and defiant and hold Him to account the same as any tyrant. But when faced with a being of unfathomable cosmic power, I don’t think there truly is anyone who wouldn’t lose their nerve.
So I just stood there, gaping up at the Effulgent One like a moron, with no idea of what to do next.
Fortunately for me, it was then that the Effulgent One finally acknowledged my presence.
Slowly, he turned his face downwards and cast his spotlight upon me, holding it there for a few long seconds before turning it to the door at the base of the windmill. I glanced up at the balcony above, and saw that it aligned almost perfectly with his head.
Evidently, he wanted to meet me face to face.
Nodding obediently, I raced to the heavy wooden door and pushed it open with all my might. The inside was dark, and I couldn’t see very well after standing right in the Effulgent One’s light, but I could hear the sounds of metal gears slowly grinding and clanking away. When I turned on my flashlight, the first thing I was able to make out was the enormous millstone. It moved slowly and steadily, squelching and squishing so that even in the poor light I knew that it wasn’t grain that was being milled.
The next thing I saw was a flight of rickety wooden stairs that snaked up all along the interior of the windmill. Each step creaked and groaned beneath my weight as I climbed them, but I nonetheless ascended them with reckless abandon. If a single one of them had given out beneath me, I could have fallen to my death, and the staircase shook back and forth so much that sometimes it felt as if it was intentionally trying to throw me off.
When I reached the top floor, I saw that the windshaft was encased in a crystalline sphere etched with leylines and strange symbols, and inside of it was some kind of complex clockwork apparatus that was powered by the spinning of the shaft. Though I was briefly curious as to the device’s purpose, it wasn’t what I had come up there for.
Turning myself towards the only door, I ran through and out onto the upper balcony. The Effulgent One was still standing just beside it, his head several times taller than I was. He looked out towards the horizon and pointed an outstretched arm in that direction, indicating that I should do the same.
From the balcony, I could see a spire made of purple volcanic glass, carved as if it was made of two intertwining gargantuan rose vines, with a stained-glass roof that made it look like a rose in full bloom. The spire was surrounded by many twisting and shifting shadows, and I could perceive a near infinitude of superimposed potential pathways branching out from the spire and stretching out across the planes.
The Effulgent One reached out and plucked at one of the pathways running over us like it was a harp string, sending vibrations down along to the spire and then back out through the entire network. I saw the sky above the spire shatter like glass, revealing a floating maelstrom of festering black fluid that had congealed into a thousand wailing faces. It began to descend as if it meant to devour the spire, but as it did so the spire pulled in the web of pathways around it like a net. The storm writhed and screamed as it tried to escape, but the spire held the net tight as a swarm of creatures too small for me to identify congregated upon the storm and began to feed upon it. But the fluid the maelstrom was composed of seemed to be corrosive, and the net began to rot beneath its influence. It sagged and it strained, until finally giving way.
A chaotic battle ensued between the spire and the maelstrom, but it hardly seemed to matter. What both I and the Efflugent One noticed the most was that the pathways that had been bound to the spire were now severed and stained by the Black Bile, drifting away wherever the wind took them.
The Effulgent One caught one of them in his hand and tugged it downwards, staring at it pensively for a long moment.
“That… that didn’t actually just happen, did it?” I asked meekly. I waited patiently for the Effulgent One to respond, but he just kept staring at the severed thread. “But… it’s going to happen? Or, it could happen?”
A slow and solemn nod confirmed that what he had shown me had portended to a possible future.
“That’s why you marked me as your follower then, isn’t it?” I asked. “You needed someone, someone other than the Virklitchen, someone who’s already involved in this bullshit and can help stop it from deteriorating into whatever the hell you just showed me. If Erich had picked anyone else to go to Virklitch that night, or hadn’t asked me to stay for the festival, it wouldn’t have been me! It didn’t have to have been me!”
His head remained somberly hung, and I hadn’t really been expecting him to respond at all to my outburst.
“Elifey liked you,” he said in a metallic, fluid voice that sounded like it was resonating out of his chest rather than his face. “I would not have chosen you if she hadn’t.”
He twirled the thread in between his fingers before gently handing it down to me like it was a streamer on a balloon. I hesitantly accepted the gesture, wrapping as much of my hand around the spectral cord as I could. The instant I touched it, a radiant and spiralling rainbow shot down its length and arced across the sky. When it reached the chaotic battle on the horizon, it dispelled the maelstrom on contact, banishing it back into the nether and signalling in biblical fashion that the storm had passed. The other wayward pathways were cleansed of the Black Bile as well, and I watched in amazement as they slowly started to reweave themselves back into an interconnected web.
“But… what does this mean? What do I actually have to do to make this a reality?” I asked.
The Effulgent One reached out his hand and pinched the cord, choking off the rainbow and ending the vision he had shown me.
“A reality?” he asked as he held his palm out flat and adjacent to the balcony. “It’s already a reality. All you need to do is make it yours.”
It seemed to me that I wasn’t likely to get anything less cryptic than that out of him, so I accepted the lift down. He took me down the hill and set me down gently beside my car before setting off out of sight and beyond my ability to pursue him.
Even though my GPS wasn’t working, the moment I was sitting in the driver’s seat the autopilot kicked in and didn’t ask me to take control until I was back on a familiar road. I know that windmill isn’t just a short drive away, and I’ll never see it again unless the Effulgent One wants me to. I don’t think I can say I’m exactly happy with how that turned out, but I suppose I accomplished what I set out to achieve. I know what the Effulgent One wants of me now, and why he chose me specifically. If it had been all his decision I think I’d still be feeling kind of torn about it, but knowing that I’ve been roped into this because of Elifey makes it a lot easier to bear.
And… I did actually manage to catch a rainbow. I just needed a giant’s help to reach it.

When you were a kid, and you saw a rainbow, did you ever want to try to get to the end of it? I bet you did. I did, anyway. It wasn’t the mythical pot of gold that tempted me. Wealth was too abstract of a concept at that age to dream about, and leprechauns were creepy little bastards. I just wanted to see what the rainbow looked like up close, and maybe even try to climb it.
Of course, you can’t get to the end of a rainbow because not only is there no end, but there isn’t even really a rainbow. It’s an illusion caused by the sunlight passing through raindrops at the right angle. If you did try to chase a rainbow down, it would move with you until it faded away. That’s why chasing rainbows is a pretty good metaphor for pursuing a beautiful illusion that can never manifest as anything concrete.
I bring all this up because I think it was that same type of urge that compelled me to chase down the Effulgent One. It’s not a perfect analogy, however, considering that I did actually catch up to the eldritch bastard.
I first saw the Effulgent One a little over two years ago. My employer – who happens to be an occultist mad scientist by the name of Erich Thorne – had tasked me with returning a young girl named Elifey to her village on the northern edges of the county. The people of Virklitch Village are very nice, but they’re also an insular, Luddite cult who worship a colossal spectral entity they call the Effulgent One. I saw this Titan during my first visit to Virklitch, and more importantly, he saw me. He left a streak of black in my soul, marking me as one of his followers. I can feel him now, when he walks in our world. Sometimes, if I look towards the horizon after sundown, I can even see him.
This entity, and my connection to him, is understandably something my employer has taken an interest in. I’ve been to Virklitch many times since my first visit, and I’ve successfully collected a good deal of vital information about the Effulgent One. The Virklitchen are the only ones who know how to summon him, and coercing them into doing so would only earn us his wrath. He’s sworn to protect them, though I haven’t the slightest idea of what motivates him to do so.
Even though I can see him, I usually try not to look, to pretend he’s not there. The Virklitchen have warned me never to chase after him. Before Virklitch was founded, the First Nations people who lived in this region were aware of the Effulgent One, though they called him the Sky Strider. Any of them that went chasing after him either failed, went mad, or were never seen again.
I was out driving after sunset, during astronomical twilight when the trees are just black silhouettes against a burnt orange horizon, when I sensed the presence of the Effulgent One. He was to the east, towering along the darkening skyline, idling amidst the fields of cyclopean wind turbines. I could see their flashing red lights in the periphery of my vision, and I knew that one of those lights was him. I tried to fight the urge to look, but fear began to gnaw at me. What if he was heading towards me right now? What if I was in danger and needed to run?
Risking a single sideways glance, I spotted his gangly form standing listlessly between the wind turbines, his long arms gently swaying as his glowing red face bobbed to and fro.
I exhaled a sigh of relief, now that I knew he wasn’t chasing me. That relief didn’t even last a moment before it was transformed into a dangerous realization. He wasn’t just not chasing me; he wasn’t moving at all. He was still. This was rare, and it presented me with a rare opportunity. I could approach him. I could speak with him.
This wasn’t a good idea, and I knew it. The Effulgent One interacted with his followers on his terms. If I annoyed him, he could squash me like a bug. Or worse. Much worse. But he had marked me as his follower and I wanted to know why. If there was any chance I could get him to answer me, I was going to take it.
“Hey Lumi,” I said to the proprietary AI assistant in my company car. “Play the cover of I’m Always Chasing Rainbows from the Hazbin Hotel pilot.”
With the mood appropriately set, I veered east the first chance I got.
Almost immediately, I noticed that the highway seemed eerily abandoned. Even if anyone else had been capable of perceiving the Effulgent One, there was no one around to see him. I got this creeping sense that the closer I drew to him, I was actually shifting more and more out of my world and more and more into his. The wind picked up and dark clouds blew in, snuffing out the fading twilight and plunging everything into an overcast night.
The Effulgent One didn’t seem to notice me as I drew closer. He was as tall as the wind turbines he stood beside, his gaunt body plated in dull iridescent scales infected with trailing fungus. The head on his lanky neck was completely hollow and filled with a glowing red light that dimly bounced off his scales.
Seeing him standing still was a lot more surreal than seeing him when he was active. As impossibly large as he is, when he’s moving it just naturally triggers your fight or flight response and you don’t really have time to take it all in. But when he’s just standing there, and you can look at him and question what you’re seeing, it just hits differently.
It wasn’t until I started slowing down that he finally turned his head in my direction, briefly engulfing me in a blinding red light. When it passed, I saw that the Effulgent One had turned away from me and I was striding down the highway. Even though his gait was casual, his stride was so long that he was still moving as quickly as any vehicle.
Reasoning that if he didn’t want me to follow him he wouldn’t be walking along the road, I slammed my foot down on the accelerator pedal and sped after him.
That’s when things started to get weird.
You know how when you’re driving at night through the country, you can’t see anything beyond your own headlights? With no visual landmarks to go by, it’s easy to get disoriented. All you have to go by is the signs, and I wasn’t paying any attention to those. All my focus was on the Effulgent One, so much so that if someone had jumped out in front of me I probably would have killed them.
I turned down at least one sideroad in my pursuit of the Effulgent One. Maybe two or three. I’m really not sure. All I know for sure is that I was so desperate not to lose him that I had become completely lost myself.
He never looked back to see if I was still following, or gave any indication that he knew or cared if I was still there. He just made his way along the backroads, his bloodred searchlight sweeping back and forth all the while, as if he was desperately seeking something of grave importance. Finally, he abandoned the road altogether and began to climb a gently rolling hill with a solitary wind turbine on top of it. I gently slowed my car to a stop and watched to see what he would do.
I had barely been keeping up with him on the roadways, so I knew I’d never catch him going off-road. If he didn’t stop at the wind turbine, then that would be the end of my little misadventure. As I watched the Effulgent One climb up the hill and cast his light upon it, I saw that the structure at the summit wasn’t a wind turbine at all, but a windmill.
It was a mammoth windmill, the size of a wind turbine, made from enormous blocks of rugged black stone. It was as impossible as the Effulgent One himself. No stone structure other than a pyramid or ziggurat could possibly be that big, and the windmill barely tapered at all towards the top. Its blades were made from a ragged black cloth that reminded me of pirate sails, and near the top I could see a light coming from a single balcony.
When the Effulgent One reached the hill’s summit, he not only came to a stop but turned back around to face me, his light illuminating the entire hillside. Whether or not it was his intention to make it easier for me to follow him up the hill, it was nonetheless the effect, so I decided not to squander it.
Grabbing the thousand-lumen flashlight from my emergency kit, I left my car on the side of the road and began the short but challenging trek up the hill.
I honestly had no idea where I was at that point. Nothing looked familiar, and the overgrown grass seemed so alien in the red light. The way it moved in the wind was so fluid it looked more like seaweed than grass. The clouds overhead seemed equally otherworldly, moving not only unusually fast but in strange patterns that didn’t seem purely meteorological in nature.
With the Effulgent One’s light aimed directly at me, there was no doubt in my mind that he had seen me, but he still gave no indication that he cared. The closer I drew to him, the more I was confronted by his unfathomable scale. I really was an insect compared to him, and it seemed inconceivable that he would make any distinction between anthropods and arthropods. He could strike me down as effortlessly and carelessly as any other bothersome bug. I approached cautiously, watching intently for any sign of hostility from him, but he remained completely and utterly unmoved.
The closer I got to him, the harder I found it to press on. From a distance, the Effulgent One is surreal enough that he doesn’t completely shatter your sense of reality, but that’s a luxury that goes down the toilet when he’s only a few strides or less from stomping you into the ground. His emaciated form wasn’t merely skeletal, but elongated; his limbs, digits, and neck all stretched out to disquieting proportions. His dull scales now seemed to be a shimmering indigo, and the fungal growths between them pulsed rhythmically with some kind of life. Whether it was with his or theirs, I cannot say. There were no ears on his round head. No features at all aside from the frontwards-facing cavity that held the searing red light.
As I slowly and timidly approached the windmill, he remained by its side, peering out across the horizon. I turned to see what he was looking at, but saw nothing. I immediately turned back to him and craned my neck skywards, marvelling at him in dumbstruck awe. I’d chased him down so that I could demand why he had marked me as one of his followers, but now that I had succeeded, I was horrified by how suicidally naïve that plan now felt.
Many an internet atheist has pontificated about how if there were a God and if they ever met Him, they would remain every bit as irreverent and defiant and hold Him to account the same as any tyrant. But when faced with a being of unfathomable cosmic power, I don’t think there truly is anyone who wouldn’t lose their nerve.
So I just stood there, gaping up at the Effulgent One like a moron, with no idea of what to do next.
Fortunately for me, it was then that the Effulgent One finally acknowledged my presence.
Slowly, he turned his face downwards and cast his spotlight upon me, holding it there for a few long seconds before turning it to the door at the base of the windmill. I glanced up at the balcony above, and saw that it aligned almost perfectly with his head.
Evidently, he wanted to meet me face to face.
Nodding obediently, I raced to the heavy wooden door and pushed it open with all my might. The inside was dark, and I couldn’t see very well after standing right in the Effulgent One’s light, but I could hear the sounds of metal gears slowly grinding and clanking away. When I turned on my flashlight, the first thing I was able to make out was the enormous millstone. It moved slowly and steadily, squelching and squishing so that even in the poor light I knew that it wasn’t grain that was being milled.
The next thing I saw was a flight of rickety wooden stairs that snaked up all along the interior of the windmill. Each step creaked and groaned beneath my weight as I climbed them, but I nonetheless ascended them with reckless abandon. If a single one of them had given out beneath me, I could have fallen to my death, and the staircase shook back and forth so much that sometimes it felt as if it was intentionally trying to throw me off.
When I reached the top floor, I saw that the windshaft was encased in a crystalline sphere etched with leylines and strange symbols, and inside of it was some kind of complex clockwork apparatus that was powered by the spinning of the shaft. Though I was briefly curious as to the device’s purpose, it wasn’t what I had come up there for.
Turning myself towards the only door, I ran through and out onto the upper balcony. The Effulgent One was still standing just beside it, his head several times taller than I was. He looked out towards the horizon and pointed an outstretched arm in that direction, indicating that I should do the same.
From the balcony, I could see a spire made of purple volcanic glass, carved as if it was made of two intertwining gargantuan rose vines, with a stained-glass roof that made it look like a rose in full bloom. The spire was surrounded by many twisting and shifting shadows, and I could perceive a near infinitude of superimposed potential pathways branching out from the spire and stretching out across the planes.
The Effulgent One reached out and plucked at one of the pathways running over us like it was a harp string, sending vibrations down along to the spire and then back out through the entire network. I saw the sky above the spire shatter like glass, revealing a floating maelstrom of festering black fluid that had congealed into a thousand wailing faces. It began to descend as if it meant to devour the spire, but as it did so the spire pulled in the web of pathways around it like a net. The storm writhed and screamed as it tried to escape, but the spire held the net tight as a swarm of creatures too small for me to identify congregated upon the storm and began to feed upon it. But the fluid the maelstrom was composed of seemed to be corrosive, and the net began to rot beneath its influence. It sagged and it strained, until finally giving way.
A chaotic battle ensued between the spire and the maelstrom, but it hardly seemed to matter. What both I and the Efflugent One noticed the most was that the pathways that had been bound to the spire were now severed and stained by the Black Bile, drifting away wherever the wind took them.
The Effulgent One caught one of them in his hand and tugged it downwards, staring at it pensively for a long moment.
“That… that didn’t actually just happen, did it?” I asked meekly. I waited patiently for the Effulgent One to respond, but he just kept staring at the severed thread. “But… it’s going to happen? Or, it could happen?”
A slow and solemn nod confirmed that what he had shown me had portended to a possible future.
“That’s why you marked me as your follower then, isn’t it?” I asked. “You needed someone, someone other than the Virklitchen, someone who’s already involved in this bullshit and can help stop it from deteriorating into whatever the hell you just showed me. If Erich had picked anyone else to go to Virklitch that night, or hadn’t asked me to stay for the festival, it wouldn’t have been me! It didn’t have to have been me!”
His head remained somberly hung, and I hadn’t really been expecting him to respond at all to my outburst.
“Elifey liked you,” he said in a metallic, fluid voice that sounded like it was resonating out of his chest rather than his face. “I would not have chosen you if she hadn’t.”
He twirled the thread in between his fingers before gently handing it down to me like it was a streamer on a balloon. I hesitantly accepted the gesture, wrapping as much of my hand around the spectral cord as I could. The instant I touched it, a radiant and spiralling rainbow shot down its length and arced across the sky. When it reached the chaotic battle on the horizon, it dispelled the maelstrom on contact, banishing it back into the nether and signalling in biblical fashion that the storm had passed. The other wayward pathways were cleansed of the Black Bile as well, and I watched in amazement as they slowly started to reweave themselves back into an interconnected web.
“But… what does this mean? What do I actually have to do to make this a reality?” I asked.
The Effulgent One reached out his hand and pinched the cord, choking off the rainbow and ending the vision he had shown me.
“A reality?” he asked as he held his palm out flat and adjacent to the balcony. “It’s already a reality. All you need to do is make it yours.”
It seemed to me that I wasn’t likely to get anything less cryptic than that out of him, so I accepted the lift down. He took me down the hill and set me down gently beside my car before setting off out of sight and beyond my ability to pursue him.
Even though my GPS wasn’t working, the moment I was sitting in the driver’s seat the autopilot kicked in and didn’t ask me to take control until I was back on a familiar road. I know that windmill isn’t just a short drive away, and I’ll never see it again unless the Effulgent One wants me to. I don’t think I can say I’m exactly happy with how that turned out, but I suppose I accomplished what I set out to achieve. I know what the Effulgent One wants of me now, and why he chose me specifically. If it had been all his decision I think I’d still be feeling kind of torn about it, but knowing that I’ve been roped into this because of Elifey makes it a lot easier to bear.
And… I did actually manage to catch a rainbow. I just needed a giant’s help to reach it.

When you were a kid, and you saw a rainbow, did you ever want to try to get to the end of it? I bet you did. I did, anyway. It wasn’t the mythical pot of gold that tempted me. Wealth was too abstract of a concept at that age to dream about, and leprechauns were creepy little bastards. I just wanted to see what the rainbow looked like up close, and maybe even try to climb it.
Of course, you can’t get to the end of a rainbow because not only is there no end, but there isn’t even really a rainbow. It’s an illusion caused by the sunlight passing through raindrops at the right angle. If you did try to chase a rainbow down, it would move with you until it faded away. That’s why chasing rainbows is a pretty good metaphor for pursuing a beautiful illusion that can never manifest as anything concrete.
I bring all this up because I think it was that same type of urge that compelled me to chase down the Effulgent One. It’s not a perfect analogy, however, considering that I did actually catch up to the eldritch bastard.
I first saw the Effulgent One a little over two years ago. My employer – who happens to be an occultist mad scientist by the name of Erich Thorne – had tasked me with returning a young girl named Elifey to her village on the northern edges of the county. The people of Virklitch Village are very nice, but they’re also an insular, Luddite cult who worship a colossal spectral entity they call the Effulgent One. I saw this Titan during my first visit to Virklitch, and more importantly, he saw me. He left a streak of black in my soul, marking me as one of his followers. I can feel him now, when he walks in our world. Sometimes, if I look towards the horizon after sundown, I can even see him.
This entity, and my connection to him, is understandably something my employer has taken an interest in. I’ve been to Virklitch many times since my first visit, and I’ve successfully collected a good deal of vital information about the Effulgent One. The Virklitchen are the only ones who know how to summon him, and coercing them into doing so would only earn us his wrath. He’s sworn to protect them, though I haven’t the slightest idea of what motivates him to do so.
Even though I can see him, I usually try not to look, to pretend he’s not there. The Virklitchen have warned me never to chase after him. Before Virklitch was founded, the First Nations people who lived in this region were aware of the Effulgent One, though they called him the Sky Strider. Any of them that went chasing after him either failed, went mad, or were never seen again.
I was out driving after sunset, during astronomical twilight when the trees are just black silhouettes against a burnt orange horizon, when I sensed the presence of the Effulgent One. He was to the east, towering along the darkening skyline, idling amidst the fields of cyclopean wind turbines. I could see their flashing red lights in the periphery of my vision, and I knew that one of those lights was him. I tried to fight the urge to look, but fear began to gnaw at me. What if he was heading towards me right now? What if I was in danger and needed to run?
Risking a single sideways glance, I spotted his gangly form standing listlessly between the wind turbines, his long arms gently swaying as his glowing red face bobbed to and fro.
I exhaled a sigh of relief, now that I knew he wasn’t chasing me. That relief didn’t even last a moment before it was transformed into a dangerous realization. He wasn’t just not chasing me; he wasn’t moving at all. He was still. This was rare, and it presented me with a rare opportunity. I could approach him. I could speak with him.
This wasn’t a good idea, and I knew it. The Effulgent One interacted with his followers on his terms. If I annoyed him, he could squash me like a bug. Or worse. Much worse. But he had marked me as his follower and I wanted to know why. If there was any chance I could get him to answer me, I was going to take it.
“Hey Lumi,” I said to the proprietary AI assistant in my company car. “Play the cover of I’m Always Chasing Rainbows from the Hazbin Hotel pilot.”
With the mood appropriately set, I veered east the first chance I got.
Almost immediately, I noticed that the highway seemed eerily abandoned. Even if anyone else had been capable of perceiving the Effulgent One, there was no one around to see him. I got this creeping sense that the closer I drew to him, I was actually shifting more and more out of my world and more and more into his. The wind picked up and dark clouds blew in, snuffing out the fading twilight and plunging everything into an overcast night.
The Effulgent One didn’t seem to notice me as I drew closer. He was as tall as the wind turbines he stood beside, his gaunt body plated in dull iridescent scales infected with trailing fungus. The head on his lanky neck was completely hollow and filled with a glowing red light that dimly bounced off his scales.
Seeing him standing still was a lot more surreal than seeing him when he was active. As impossibly large as he is, when he’s moving it just naturally triggers your fight or flight response and you don’t really have time to take it all in. But when he’s just standing there, and you can look at him and question what you’re seeing, it just hits differently.
It wasn’t until I started slowing down that he finally turned his head in my direction, briefly engulfing me in a blinding red light. When it passed, I saw that the Effulgent One had turned away from me and I was striding down the highway. Even though his gait was casual, his stride was so long that he was still moving as quickly as any vehicle.
Reasoning that if he didn’t want me to follow him he wouldn’t be walking along the road, I slammed my foot down on the accelerator pedal and sped after him.
That’s when things started to get weird.
You know how when you’re driving at night through the country, you can’t see anything beyond your own headlights? With no visual landmarks to go by, it’s easy to get disoriented. All you have to go by is the signs, and I wasn’t paying any attention to those. All my focus was on the Effulgent One, so much so that if someone had jumped out in front of me I probably would have killed them.
I turned down at least one sideroad in my pursuit of the Effulgent One. Maybe two or three. I’m really not sure. All I know for sure is that I was so desperate not to lose him that I had become completely lost myself.
He never looked back to see if I was still following, or gave any indication that he knew or cared if I was still there. He just made his way along the backroads, his bloodred searchlight sweeping back and forth all the while, as if he was desperately seeking something of grave importance. Finally, he abandoned the road altogether and began to climb a gently rolling hill with a solitary wind turbine on top of it. I gently slowed my car to a stop and watched to see what he would do.
I had barely been keeping up with him on the roadways, so I knew I’d never catch him going off-road. If he didn’t stop at the wind turbine, then that would be the end of my little misadventure. As I watched the Effulgent One climb up the hill and cast his light upon it, I saw that the structure at the summit wasn’t a wind turbine at all, but a windmill.
It was a mammoth windmill, the size of a wind turbine, made from enormous blocks of rugged black stone. It was as impossible as the Effulgent One himself. No stone structure other than a pyramid or ziggurat could possibly be that big, and the windmill barely tapered at all towards the top. Its blades were made from a ragged black cloth that reminded me of pirate sails, and near the top I could see a light coming from a single balcony.
When the Effulgent One reached the hill’s summit, he not only came to a stop but turned back around to face me, his light illuminating the entire hillside. Whether or not it was his intention to make it easier for me to follow him up the hill, it was nonetheless the effect, so I decided not to squander it.
Grabbing the thousand-lumen flashlight from my emergency kit, I left my car on the side of the road and began the short but challenging trek up the hill.
I honestly had no idea where I was at that point. Nothing looked familiar, and the overgrown grass seemed so alien in the red light. The way it moved in the wind was so fluid it looked more like seaweed than grass. The clouds overhead seemed equally otherworldly, moving not only unusually fast but in strange patterns that didn’t seem purely meteorological in nature.
With the Effulgent One’s light aimed directly at me, there was no doubt in my mind that he had seen me, but he still gave no indication that he cared. The closer I drew to him, the more I was confronted by his unfathomable scale. I really was an insect compared to him, and it seemed inconceivable that he would make any distinction between anthropods and arthropods. He could strike me down as effortlessly and carelessly as any other bothersome bug. I approached cautiously, watching intently for any sign of hostility from him, but he remained completely and utterly unmoved.
The closer I got to him, the harder I found it to press on. From a distance, the Effulgent One is surreal enough that he doesn’t completely shatter your sense of reality, but that’s a luxury that goes down the toilet when he’s only a few strides or less from stomping you into the ground. His emaciated form wasn’t merely skeletal, but elongated; his limbs, digits, and neck all stretched out to disquieting proportions. His dull scales now seemed to be a shimmering indigo, and the fungal growths between them pulsed rhythmically with some kind of life. Whether it was with his or theirs, I cannot say. There were no ears on his round head. No features at all aside from the frontwards-facing cavity that held the searing red light.
As I slowly and timidly approached the windmill, he remained by its side, peering out across the horizon. I turned to see what he was looking at, but saw nothing. I immediately turned back to him and craned my neck skywards, marvelling at him in dumbstruck awe. I’d chased him down so that I could demand why he had marked me as one of his followers, but now that I had succeeded, I was horrified by how suicidally naïve that plan now felt.
Many an internet atheist has pontificated about how if there were a God and if they ever met Him, they would remain every bit as irreverent and defiant and hold Him to account the same as any tyrant. But when faced with a being of unfathomable cosmic power, I don’t think there truly is anyone who wouldn’t lose their nerve.
So I just stood there, gaping up at the Effulgent One like a moron, with no idea of what to do next.
Fortunately for me, it was then that the Effulgent One finally acknowledged my presence.
Slowly, he turned his face downwards and cast his spotlight upon me, holding it there for a few long seconds before turning it to the door at the base of the windmill. I glanced up at the balcony above, and saw that it aligned almost perfectly with his head.
Evidently, he wanted to meet me face to face.
Nodding obediently, I raced to the heavy wooden door and pushed it open with all my might. The inside was dark, and I couldn’t see very well after standing right in the Effulgent One’s light, but I could hear the sounds of metal gears slowly grinding and clanking away. When I turned on my flashlight, the first thing I was able to make out was the enormous millstone. It moved slowly and steadily, squelching and squishing so that even in the poor light I knew that it wasn’t grain that was being milled.
The next thing I saw was a flight of rickety wooden stairs that snaked up all along the interior of the windmill. Each step creaked and groaned beneath my weight as I climbed them, but I nonetheless ascended them with reckless abandon. If a single one of them had given out beneath me, I could have fallen to my death, and the staircase shook back and forth so much that sometimes it felt as if it was intentionally trying to throw me off.
When I reached the top floor, I saw that the windshaft was encased in a crystalline sphere etched with leylines and strange symbols, and inside of it was some kind of complex clockwork apparatus that was powered by the spinning of the shaft. Though I was briefly curious as to the device’s purpose, it wasn’t what I had come up there for.
Turning myself towards the only door, I ran through and out onto the upper balcony. The Effulgent One was still standing just beside it, his head several times taller than I was. He looked out towards the horizon and pointed an outstretched arm in that direction, indicating that I should do the same.
From the balcony, I could see a spire made of purple volcanic glass, carved as if it was made of two intertwining gargantuan rose vines, with a stained-glass roof that made it look like a rose in full bloom. The spire was surrounded by many twisting and shifting shadows, and I could perceive a near infinitude of superimposed potential pathways branching out from the spire and stretching out across the planes.
The Effulgent One reached out and plucked at one of the pathways running over us like it was a harp string, sending vibrations down along to the spire and then back out through the entire network. I saw the sky above the spire shatter like glass, revealing a floating maelstrom of festering black fluid that had congealed into a thousand wailing faces. It began to descend as if it meant to devour the spire, but as it did so the spire pulled in the web of pathways around it like a net. The storm writhed and screamed as it tried to escape, but the spire held the net tight as a swarm of creatures too small for me to identify congregated upon the storm and began to feed upon it. But the fluid the maelstrom was composed of seemed to be corrosive, and the net began to rot beneath its influence. It sagged and it strained, until finally giving way.
A chaotic battle ensued between the spire and the maelstrom, but it hardly seemed to matter. What both I and the Efflugent One noticed the most was that the pathways that had been bound to the spire were now severed and stained by the Black Bile, drifting away wherever the wind took them.
The Effulgent One caught one of them in his hand and tugged it downwards, staring at it pensively for a long moment.
“That… that didn’t actually just happen, did it?” I asked meekly. I waited patiently for the Effulgent One to respond, but he just kept staring at the severed thread. “But… it’s going to happen? Or, it could happen?”
A slow and solemn nod confirmed that what he had shown me had portended to a possible future.
“That’s why you marked me as your follower then, isn’t it?” I asked. “You needed someone, someone other than the Virklitchen, someone who’s already involved in this bullshit and can help stop it from deteriorating into whatever the hell you just showed me. If Erich had picked anyone else to go to Virklitch that night, or hadn’t asked me to stay for the festival, it wouldn’t have been me! It didn’t have to have been me!”
His head remained somberly hung, and I hadn’t really been expecting him to respond at all to my outburst.
“Elifey liked you,” he said in a metallic, fluid voice that sounded like it was resonating out of his chest rather than his face. “I would not have chosen you if she hadn’t.”
He twirled the thread in between his fingers before gently handing it down to me like it was a streamer on a balloon. I hesitantly accepted the gesture, wrapping as much of my hand around the spectral cord as I could. The instant I touched it, a radiant and spiralling rainbow shot down its length and arced across the sky. When it reached the chaotic battle on the horizon, it dispelled the maelstrom on contact, banishing it back into the nether and signalling in biblical fashion that the storm had passed. The other wayward pathways were cleansed of the Black Bile as well, and I watched in amazement as they slowly started to reweave themselves back into an interconnected web.
“But… what does this mean? What do I actually have to do to make this a reality?” I asked.
The Effulgent One reached out his hand and pinched the cord, choking off the rainbow and ending the vision he had shown me.
“A reality?” he asked as he held his palm out flat and adjacent to the balcony. “It’s already a reality. All you need to do is make it yours.”
It seemed to me that I wasn’t likely to get anything less cryptic than that out of him, so I accepted the lift down. He took me down the hill and set me down gently beside my car before setting off out of sight and beyond my ability to pursue him.
Even though my GPS wasn’t working, the moment I was sitting in the driver’s seat the autopilot kicked in and didn’t ask me to take control until I was back on a familiar road. I know that windmill isn’t just a short drive away, and I’ll never see it again unless the Effulgent One wants me to. I don’t think I can say I’m exactly happy with how that turned out, but I suppose I accomplished what I set out to achieve. I know what the Effulgent One wants of me now, and why he chose me specifically. If it had been all his decision I think I’d still be feeling kind of torn about it, but knowing that I’ve been roped into this because of Elifey makes it a lot easier to bear.
And… I did actually manage to catch a rainbow. I just needed a giant’s help to reach it.

When you were a kid, and you saw a rainbow, did you ever want to try to get to the end of it? I bet you did. I did, anyway. It wasn’t the mythical pot of gold that tempted me. Wealth was too abstract of a concept at that age to dream about, and leprechauns were creepy little bastards. I just wanted to see what the rainbow looked like up close, and maybe even try to climb it.
Of course, you can’t get to the end of a rainbow because not only is there no end, but there isn’t even really a rainbow. It’s an illusion caused by the sunlight passing through raindrops at the right angle. If you did try to chase a rainbow down, it would move with you until it faded away. That’s why chasing rainbows is a pretty good metaphor for pursuing a beautiful illusion that can never manifest as anything concrete.
I bring all this up because I think it was that same type of urge that compelled me to chase down the Effulgent One. It’s not a perfect analogy, however, considering that I did actually catch up to the eldritch bastard.
I first saw the Effulgent One a little over two years ago. My employer – who happens to be an occultist mad scientist by the name of Erich Thorne – had tasked me with returning a young girl named Elifey to her village on the northern edges of the county. The people of Virklitch Village are very nice, but they’re also an insular, Luddite cult who worship a colossal spectral entity they call the Effulgent One. I saw this Titan during my first visit to Virklitch, and more importantly, he saw me. He left a streak of black in my soul, marking me as one of his followers. I can feel him now, when he walks in our world. Sometimes, if I look towards the horizon after sundown, I can even see him.
This entity, and my connection to him, is understandably something my employer has taken an interest in. I’ve been to Virklitch many times since my first visit, and I’ve successfully collected a good deal of vital information about the Effulgent One. The Virklitchen are the only ones who know how to summon him, and coercing them into doing so would only earn us his wrath. He’s sworn to protect them, though I haven’t the slightest idea of what motivates him to do so.
Even though I can see him, I usually try not to look, to pretend he’s not there. The Virklitchen have warned me never to chase after him. Before Virklitch was founded, the First Nations people who lived in this region were aware of the Effulgent One, though they called him the Sky Strider. Any of them that went chasing after him either failed, went mad, or were never seen again.
I was out driving after sunset, during astronomical twilight when the trees are just black silhouettes against a burnt orange horizon, when I sensed the presence of the Effulgent One. He was to the east, towering along the darkening skyline, idling amidst the fields of cyclopean wind turbines. I could see their flashing red lights in the periphery of my vision, and I knew that one of those lights was him. I tried to fight the urge to look, but fear began to gnaw at me. What if he was heading towards me right now? What if I was in danger and needed to run?
Risking a single sideways glance, I spotted his gangly form standing listlessly between the wind turbines, his long arms gently swaying as his glowing red face bobbed to and fro.
I exhaled a sigh of relief, now that I knew he wasn’t chasing me. That relief didn’t even last a moment before it was transformed into a dangerous realization. He wasn’t just not chasing me; he wasn’t moving at all. He was still. This was rare, and it presented me with a rare opportunity. I could approach him. I could speak with him.
This wasn’t a good idea, and I knew it. The Effulgent One interacted with his followers on his terms. If I annoyed him, he could squash me like a bug. Or worse. Much worse. But he had marked me as his follower and I wanted to know why. If there was any chance I could get him to answer me, I was going to take it.
“Hey Lumi,” I said to the proprietary AI assistant in my company car. “Play the cover of I’m Always Chasing Rainbows from the Hazbin Hotel pilot.”
With the mood appropriately set, I veered east the first chance I got.
Almost immediately, I noticed that the highway seemed eerily abandoned. Even if anyone else had been capable of perceiving the Effulgent One, there was no one around to see him. I got this creeping sense that the closer I drew to him, I was actually shifting more and more out of my world and more and more into his. The wind picked up and dark clouds blew in, snuffing out the fading twilight and plunging everything into an overcast night.
The Effulgent One didn’t seem to notice me as I drew closer. He was as tall as the wind turbines he stood beside, his gaunt body plated in dull iridescent scales infected with trailing fungus. The head on his lanky neck was completely hollow and filled with a glowing red light that dimly bounced off his scales.
Seeing him standing still was a lot more surreal than seeing him when he was active. As impossibly large as he is, when he’s moving it just naturally triggers your fight or flight response and you don’t really have time to take it all in. But when he’s just standing there, and you can look at him and question what you’re seeing, it just hits differently.
It wasn’t until I started slowing down that he finally turned his head in my direction, briefly engulfing me in a blinding red light. When it passed, I saw that the Effulgent One had turned away from me and I was striding down the highway. Even though his gait was casual, his stride was so long that he was still moving as quickly as any vehicle.
Reasoning that if he didn’t want me to follow him he wouldn’t be walking along the road, I slammed my foot down on the accelerator pedal and sped after him.
That’s when things started to get weird.
You know how when you’re driving at night through the country, you can’t see anything beyond your own headlights? With no visual landmarks to go by, it’s easy to get disoriented. All you have to go by is the signs, and I wasn’t paying any attention to those. All my focus was on the Effulgent One, so much so that if someone had jumped out in front of me I probably would have killed them.
I turned down at least one sideroad in my pursuit of the Effulgent One. Maybe two or three. I’m really not sure. All I know for sure is that I was so desperate not to lose him that I had become completely lost myself.
He never looked back to see if I was still following, or gave any indication that he knew or cared if I was still there. He just made his way along the backroads, his bloodred searchlight sweeping back and forth all the while, as if he was desperately seeking something of grave importance. Finally, he abandoned the road altogether and began to climb a gently rolling hill with a solitary wind turbine on top of it. I gently slowed my car to a stop and watched to see what he would do.
I had barely been keeping up with him on the roadways, so I knew I’d never catch him going off-road. If he didn’t stop at the wind turbine, then that would be the end of my little misadventure. As I watched the Effulgent One climb up the hill and cast his light upon it, I saw that the structure at the summit wasn’t a wind turbine at all, but a windmill.
It was a mammoth windmill, the size of a wind turbine, made from enormous blocks of rugged black stone. It was as impossible as the Effulgent One himself. No stone structure other than a pyramid or ziggurat could possibly be that big, and the windmill barely tapered at all towards the top. Its blades were made from a ragged black cloth that reminded me of pirate sails, and near the top I could see a light coming from a single balcony.
When the Effulgent One reached the hill’s summit, he not only came to a stop but turned back around to face me, his light illuminating the entire hillside. Whether or not it was his intention to make it easier for me to follow him up the hill, it was nonetheless the effect, so I decided not to squander it.
Grabbing the thousand-lumen flashlight from my emergency kit, I left my car on the side of the road and began the short but challenging trek up the hill.
I honestly had no idea where I was at that point. Nothing looked familiar, and the overgrown grass seemed so alien in the red light. The way it moved in the wind was so fluid it looked more like seaweed than grass. The clouds overhead seemed equally otherworldly, moving not only unusually fast but in strange patterns that didn’t seem purely meteorological in nature.
With the Effulgent One’s light aimed directly at me, there was no doubt in my mind that he had seen me, but he still gave no indication that he cared. The closer I drew to him, the more I was confronted by his unfathomable scale. I really was an insect compared to him, and it seemed inconceivable that he would make any distinction between anthropods and arthropods. He could strike me down as effortlessly and carelessly as any other bothersome bug. I approached cautiously, watching intently for any sign of hostility from him, but he remained completely and utterly unmoved.
The closer I got to him, the harder I found it to press on. From a distance, the Effulgent One is surreal enough that he doesn’t completely shatter your sense of reality, but that’s a luxury that goes down the toilet when he’s only a few strides or less from stomping you into the ground. His emaciated form wasn’t merely skeletal, but elongated; his limbs, digits, and neck all stretched out to disquieting proportions. His dull scales now seemed to be a shimmering indigo, and the fungal growths between them pulsed rhythmically with some kind of life. Whether it was with his or theirs, I cannot say. There were no ears on his round head. No features at all aside from the frontwards-facing cavity that held the searing red light.
As I slowly and timidly approached the windmill, he remained by its side, peering out across the horizon. I turned to see what he was looking at, but saw nothing. I immediately turned back to him and craned my neck skywards, marvelling at him in dumbstruck awe. I’d chased him down so that I could demand why he had marked me as one of his followers, but now that I had succeeded, I was horrified by how suicidally naïve that plan now felt.
Many an internet atheist has pontificated about how if there were a God and if they ever met Him, they would remain every bit as irreverent and defiant and hold Him to account the same as any tyrant. But when faced with a being of unfathomable cosmic power, I don’t think there truly is anyone who wouldn’t lose their nerve.
So I just stood there, gaping up at the Effulgent One like a moron, with no idea of what to do next.
Fortunately for me, it was then that the Effulgent One finally acknowledged my presence.
Slowly, he turned his face downwards and cast his spotlight upon me, holding it there for a few long seconds before turning it to the door at the base of the windmill. I glanced up at the balcony above, and saw that it aligned almost perfectly with his head.
Evidently, he wanted to meet me face to face.
Nodding obediently, I raced to the heavy wooden door and pushed it open with all my might. The inside was dark, and I couldn’t see very well after standing right in the Effulgent One’s light, but I could hear the sounds of metal gears slowly grinding and clanking away. When I turned on my flashlight, the first thing I was able to make out was the enormous millstone. It moved slowly and steadily, squelching and squishing so that even in the poor light I knew that it wasn’t grain that was being milled.
The next thing I saw was a flight of rickety wooden stairs that snaked up all along the interior of the windmill. Each step creaked and groaned beneath my weight as I climbed them, but I nonetheless ascended them with reckless abandon. If a single one of them had given out beneath me, I could have fallen to my death, and the staircase shook back and forth so much that sometimes it felt as if it was intentionally trying to throw me off.
When I reached the top floor, I saw that the windshaft was encased in a crystalline sphere etched with leylines and strange symbols, and inside of it was some kind of complex clockwork apparatus that was powered by the spinning of the shaft. Though I was briefly curious as to the device’s purpose, it wasn’t what I had come up there for.
Turning myself towards the only door, I ran through and out onto the upper balcony. The Effulgent One was still standing just beside it, his head several times taller than I was. He looked out towards the horizon and pointed an outstretched arm in that direction, indicating that I should do the same.
From the balcony, I could see a spire made of purple volcanic glass, carved as if it was made of two intertwining gargantuan rose vines, with a stained-glass roof that made it look like a rose in full bloom. The spire was surrounded by many twisting and shifting shadows, and I could perceive a near infinitude of superimposed potential pathways branching out from the spire and stretching out across the planes.
The Effulgent One reached out and plucked at one of the pathways running over us like it was a harp string, sending vibrations down along to the spire and then back out through the entire network. I saw the sky above the spire shatter like glass, revealing a floating maelstrom of festering black fluid that had congealed into a thousand wailing faces. It began to descend as if it meant to devour the spire, but as it did so the spire pulled in the web of pathways around it like a net. The storm writhed and screamed as it tried to escape, but the spire held the net tight as a swarm of creatures too small for me to identify congregated upon the storm and began to feed upon it. But the fluid the maelstrom was composed of seemed to be corrosive, and the net began to rot beneath its influence. It sagged and it strained, until finally giving way.
A chaotic battle ensued between the spire and the maelstrom, but it hardly seemed to matter. What both I and the Efflugent One noticed the most was that the pathways that had been bound to the spire were now severed and stained by the Black Bile, drifting away wherever the wind took them.
The Effulgent One caught one of them in his hand and tugged it downwards, staring at it pensively for a long moment.
“That… that didn’t actually just happen, did it?” I asked meekly. I waited patiently for the Effulgent One to respond, but he just kept staring at the severed thread. “But… it’s going to happen? Or, it could happen?”
A slow and solemn nod confirmed that what he had shown me had portended to a possible future.
“That’s why you marked me as your follower then, isn’t it?” I asked. “You needed someone, someone other than the Virklitchen, someone who’s already involved in this bullshit and can help stop it from deteriorating into whatever the hell you just showed me. If Erich had picked anyone else to go to Virklitch that night, or hadn’t asked me to stay for the festival, it wouldn’t have been me! It didn’t have to have been me!”
His head remained somberly hung, and I hadn’t really been expecting him to respond at all to my outburst.
“Elifey liked you,” he said in a metallic, fluid voice that sounded like it was resonating out of his chest rather than his face. “I would not have chosen you if she hadn’t.”
He twirled the thread in between his fingers before gently handing it down to me like it was a streamer on a balloon. I hesitantly accepted the gesture, wrapping as much of my hand around the spectral cord as I could. The instant I touched it, a radiant and spiralling rainbow shot down its length and arced across the sky. When it reached the chaotic battle on the horizon, it dispelled the maelstrom on contact, banishing it back into the nether and signalling in biblical fashion that the storm had passed. The other wayward pathways were cleansed of the Black Bile as well, and I watched in amazement as they slowly started to reweave themselves back into an interconnected web.
“But… what does this mean? What do I actually have to do to make this a reality?” I asked.
The Effulgent One reached out his hand and pinched the cord, choking off the rainbow and ending the vision he had shown me.
“A reality?” he asked as he held his palm out flat and adjacent to the balcony. “It’s already a reality. All you need to do is make it yours.”
It seemed to me that I wasn’t likely to get anything less cryptic than that out of him, so I accepted the lift down. He took me down the hill and set me down gently beside my car before setting off out of sight and beyond my ability to pursue him.
Even though my GPS wasn’t working, the moment I was sitting in the driver’s seat the autopilot kicked in and didn’t ask me to take control until I was back on a familiar road. I know that windmill isn’t just a short drive away, and I’ll never see it again unless the Effulgent One wants me to. I don’t think I can say I’m exactly happy with how that turned out, but I suppose I accomplished what I set out to achieve. I know what the Effulgent One wants of me now, and why he chose me specifically. If it had been all his decision I think I’d still be feeling kind of torn about it, but knowing that I’ve been roped into this because of Elifey makes it a lot easier to bear.
And… I did actually manage to catch a rainbow. I just needed a giant’s help to reach it.

I don’t think the Guardian’s starting pitching has been as bad as others think, but they definitely need more depth to make it to the post season and, if anything, preserve our all time great bullpen. I decided to do a deep dive on nearly every pitcher who could be on the trade market in the coming weeks. There are surprisingly a lot of decent options, although more options will become apparent as teams fall out of the playoff race as the season progresses. I don’t have the best feel for the farm system right now, although I would presume that prospects like DeLauter, Velasquez, or Manzardo are mostly untouchable at the moment, considering their upside or proximity to the majors.
Luis Severino (NYM)
Price: Low
Upside: High
Risk: Medium
If I could choose one player for the Guards to go after, it might be Severino. After a terrible 2023, he has completely returned to his career norms this year, and has a lot to prove in a contract year. He keeps the ball on the ground, which would play into the Guardian’s excellent infield defense, and can easily pitch deep into games. He shouldn’t be too expensive, as the Mets claim to want to retool this year and he is on a 1 year contract.
Jesùs Luzardo (MIA)
Price: Extreme
Upside: High
Risk: High
Luzardo has been the talk of the coming trade season. He was great in 22 and 23, but hasn’t been nearly as sharp this year. Not gonna give tons of length and can get hammered at times but has great strikeout stuff. I would be shocked if the Guards went after him because he is gonna be incredibly expensive with his popularity and 2.5 years of control left.
Jordan Montgomery (ARI)
Price: Medium
Upside: Medium
Risk: Extreme
Montgomery is on an expensive deal, with $25mil this year and a player option for 2025. He has not been good this year, although his Statcast data indicates he should regress positively somewhat. I’m sure the D-backs would love to trade him, but I don’t think the Guards would like to be on the hook for nearly $30 million. I would’ only go for him if the need for pitching becomes dire.
Erick Fedde (CWS)
Price: High
Upside: Medium
Risk: Medium
After reinventing himself overseas, Fedde has been sublime. He is on a 2 year $15 million deal. He looks excellent right now, allowing soft contact and keeping the ball on the ground, although I wouldn’t be surprised if his walk and strikeout rates regressed negatively to his career norms. His start’s quality are also sometimes feast or famine. I’d pursue him, but he is in division and I can’t imagine him being very cheap.
Trevor Williams (WSH)
Price: Medium
Upside: Medium
Risk: High
After 8 years of middling pitching, Williams has put it together this year, his statline highlighted by a 2.78 FIP. This is largely due to a microscopic home run rate, although his barrel rate suggests this may not be a fluke. His main issue is that he barely averages 5 innings a start. He shouldn’t be horribly expensive as Washington probably isn’t competing this year, but his track record and low stamina produces doubt.
Yusei Kikuchi (TOR)
Price: High
Upside: Medium
Risk: High
Kikuchi has been a popular name being thrown around, but I highly doubt Toronto would trade him, as their front office has every motivation to drag the team to the playoffs. Kikuchi also won’t give much length and his underlying data and track record do nothing to wow me, but he is having a nice year. I really don’t think his upside is worth the price at all.
Paul Blackburn (OAK)
Price: Medium
Upside: Low
Risk: Medium
Blackburn has been a below average starter in Oakland’s system for the past 8 years. He’s a zone filler who lives and dies by the quality of contact he allows. Not gonna get terribly deep into games, but doesn’t blow up that often. Statcast data is very mid. He is very cost controlled and has 1.5 years left on his contract, so he shouldn’t require that much to acquire.
Justin Verlander (HOU)
Price: Medium
Upside: High
Risk: Medium
We all know Verlander. He is definitely in the twilight years of his career, but he still isn’t terrible and I know he is motivated to keep playing. He gets tons of fly balls, which has burned him this year, but still has decent strikeout stuff and control. He has a player option for $35 million if he pitches 140 innings, and is owed $17 million this year. This would be such an interesting move, but has the chance to be really expensive. That said, the Houston farm system is in dire need of prospects, so I could see a fleece opportunity.
Lance Lynn (STL)
Price: Low
Upside: Low
Risk: Medium
This is a perfect dumpster diving move. Lynn has been entirely average this year (he wasn’t gonna have a 5.5% HR rate forever), only getting 5ip per start. He can be expected to eat innings and get strikeouts, but his ceiling is low. Definitely a step up from a Syndergaard or maybe Carrasco, but not gonna be a difference making move most likely.
Here are some other options I’ve seen thrown around that I think are extremely unlikely:
Kevin Gausman (TOR)
Price: Extreme
Upside: High
Risk: Medium
I can’t see any way Gausman is traded. He is still owed around $57 million over 2.5 more years and, again, I don’t see Toronto selling easily. Gausman’s upside is untenable but he definitely is having a down year, currently allowing a lot of hard contact and missing less bats than he used to. He is also 33 with some mileage on his arm, so there’s no guarantee that he improves from here.
JP Sears (OAK)
Price: High
Upside: Low
Risk: Medium
The entire problem here is that Sears has 5.5 years of control left and is basically only a slightly better version of Logan Allen. He doesn’t walk a ton of people and has no glaring flaw in his game, but is definitely not as good as his 3.93 ERA suggests. I don’t see him moving the needle come playoffs.
Tanner Houck (BOS)
Price: Extreme
Upside: High
Risk: Medium
Boston is only 1.5 games out of a Wildcard spot, and Houck, with 4.5 years of control remaining, has been their ace. Houck is having an excellent year all around and should continue to do so. No chance the Guardians can get him by the trade deadline.
Jack Flaherty (DET)
Price: High
Upside: High
Risk: Medium
Flaherty is also in Cy Young contention, and that combined with being on a Detroit team very much in contention makes him far outside of trade possibilities. He looks incredible right now and would be a dream acquisition. Perhaps an otherworldly losing streak by Detroit gives it a chance.
José Soriano (LAA)
Price: High
Upside: Medium
Risk: High
Soriano is a reliever turned starter for the Angels who is having an all around decent year. He is quite raw right now but has a great 98 mph fastball. I just think LA would rather keep him in the system as he has 5.5 years of control remaining and has a high ceiling. Furthermore, he would be easily the least experienced starter in our rotation, so he would be a big gamble.

It is one full chapter, but because it is so long, I broke into four parts.
This is a theory for the actual Prologue of The Winds of Winter. Please enjoy. This is Part 4 of 4.
The Winds of Winter
Prologue
[Part 3]
Suddenly a voice roared from above. “This is Ser Forley Prester! Drop your weapons! Drop them!”
Ser Barnabus started to curse as he stood on the ladder halfway. He took a deep breath in disappointment. “Come on Leo, we have work to do.” He ascended.
Leo gave the golden egg to a shocked Lady Mormont and took a step towards the ladder, but he then turned around to Eleyna. He kissed her on the lips. The princess fought back and held Leo’s blond head with both her hands, forcing more of herself onto him. Their tongues danced a secret hidden inside their mouths, taking each other’s breath away over and over again. Olyvar did not think they would ever let go, until Eleyna did, shedding a tear. Leo turned back to the ladder. Ice in his veins and without another word, he began to climb.
Ser Brynden shared a look with Ser Olyvar. “I’m not kissing you!” He began walking towards the ladder as well, with Lord Edmure Tully trailing. He shoved his nephew aside. “Your lady wife is waiting for you on that ship with your child! Protect them! Keep the Tully name alive! Fly away now! That is an order! Take Queen Jeyne Stark to the ship and protect her family too!” The Blackfish conjured a duty that Edmure could not decline. He gave his uncle a sad agreeing nod. While climbing up, the Blackfish then looked at Olyvar. “Ser Frey, guard this ladder!”
Though not giving any direct orders to the Seashell Knight, Ser Raynald Westerling kissed his sisters and mother. They begged him not to go, but Ray flew to the top as well.
Ser Olyvar got up and began to follow, but the crying Queen tugged his cloak. “Olyvar, you promised me.”
“Goodbye Jeyne. I have to do my duty.”
“Just hang on a minute. Listen and promise me Ser Frey. Don’t be a fool. If you are in trouble, don’t try to be brave, just fly, fly away. Find me.”
Olyvar Frey got to his knees again and kissed her forehead. “Okay. Jeyne, my Queen … I’ll be back. I promise.”
“We need to move her to the rowboats,” Alesander Frey suggested. Olyvar hugged his brother, and ordered him to carry Jeyne’s weight to the exit with Lord Edmure’s help. Sybell and Eleyna Westerling held up Jeyne’s thighs as Lady Mormont spearheaded the path with her torchlight in one hand and the golden egg curled on the other.
“You better be right behind us,” Maege commanded.
“I will,” Olyvar hoped.
The new knight approached the base of the wet ladder and began to climb. He reached halfway and stopped to listen above. The thunderstorm roared its fury, and the Blackfish was already speaking.
“What kind of knight threatens a pregnant woman?” Ser Tully voiced his rhetorical question.
“We did not know she was pregnant. She fooled us with her sister. But I am one that follows the orders of his liege lord.”
“You mean the Lannister one that killed his king once? Or the other Frey one that killed his other king too? Or the dead lord who killed Dornish babes? How do the princes of Dorne feel about you cheap-honor Lannisters?”
“You were the ones that rebel against the crown.”
“And it was the Kingslayer that threw Bran Stark out the window in a time of peace! At his own home! Do the Lannisters enjoy killing children and murdering unarmed people at dinner?”
“He is my liege lord.”
“Aye, and you seem like someone who knows his role and shuts his mouth. Do you want to be remembered for the rest of time as the knight that cleans up after his shit? ‘Here lies Ser Forley Prester, the legend that wipes the Goldenhand’s ass,’ will be written on your tomb in gold. Too bad your grave-mark will forget the part where everyday you take his golden-hand, shine it up real nice, turn that piece of metal sideways and shove it up your own candy arse for pleasure!”
The men above laughed as a shriek of thunder rumbled not too far from the Rock.
“You seem like a charming man Ser Brynden, but we are not here to discuss the rights or wrongs of men, knights, lords, kings and princes who are far far away from here.”
“Well here in my garrison I have Ser Olyvar Frey, son to Walder Frey, and a loyalist to his King, Robb Stark. Please ask Ser Olyvar Frey which is right and which is shit?”
Olyvar realized the Blackfish is chatting to buy time for Jeyne to escape.
“Is he a knight now?” A familiar voice that sounded like Edwyn Frey asked. “How did that come to pass?”
“Kill the right people I suppose. And whom do I have the pleasure of speaking to now? What is your name my lord?”
“My name is Ed–“
“IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!”
Giggles tickled the rainy circular drain above Olyvar.
“And aye, I knighted him myself. And his Queen in the North even made him a new coat of arms to differentiate himself from his disgraceful family,” the Blackfish announced to Edwyn Frey.
“And how would I know what cloak he wears now?” Ser Forley’s voice continued.
“Fastened by Queen Stark herself, it’s the bridge of the twin towers with a river flowing underneath, colored Stark grey and Tully red & blue. But every one of my friends here are all championed by our Queen. Are any of you beloved by a queen?”
Ser Forley tried to counter, “A new sigil of water flowing underneath a bridge? Did he make the water flow himself? Is he a plumber?”
“Aye, he may be a plumber knight, but you got shit for honors.”
“My honor is in tact.”
“Was it in tact when you abandoned your army at the Battle of the Camps? Claiming that you have honor is like claiming turtles can grow wings and fly. My plumber knight has more honor than your shit!”
Ser Forley paused … and then exulted, “Will this plumber be cleaning up my shit later?” Quiet chuckles whispered from the higher balconies.
The Blackfish retaliates, “As long as you acknowledge your honor as shit, he will.”
Loud laughter filled the air, but with Olyvar hiding in the hole of the floor, he could not tell if it was from his brothers, from his foes or both. Alive or facing death, one should know better not to trade japes with the Blackfish.
“Enough!” yelled Ser Forley. “You are clearly out manned down there at this courtyard! At least three of my men to one of yours! AND I have the high ground! So I won’t say it again, drop your weapons and I will let your men live!”
“Do you take me for a motley fool? You just don’t want us to loose back when you shoot your crossbows at us. You Lannisters cannot win in a fair fight against us if we are armed, but you men sure do a good job of killing defenseless people and children. And I will not give you that pleasure!”
“I do not know what you heard, but that is not entirely true.”
“Not entirely true? Do you Lannisters fondle the children first before you kill them? Do you give the children a good sniff before you cook them like Mad Danelle Lothson? Mother have mercy!” Ser Brynden teased.
“Enough! I will let your men live if you drop your weapons! I swear it on my hon-“
“We shit on your honor! Are there no true knights among you lot? You men following this shit knight’s shitty order, do you not have any honor yourselves? To chase after and kill a woman who is in labor? To kill a babe? Our king—”
“OUR CHOSEN KING!” Lord Galbart Glover’s voice thundered in before the Blackfish continued.
“—chose to execute his own kin and bannerman for butchering children … Lannister children! Frey children! But your knight here serves men without honor. Ser Jaime Lannister the Kingslayer! Lord Walder Frey the Guestslayer! Lord Roose Bolton the Turncloak! COWARDS! Men who serves hospitality with bloodshed beneath their roofs and massacre innocents! Will you continue to serve these false knights and false men? Are you not fathers, nor aspire to be fathers some day? Well serve your CHOSEN lord’s bidding and be cursed! A predator of children is no lord of mine!” Ser Brynden Blackfish Tully spat and thunder boomed. “The gods will never forgive that, the slaughter at the Twins, the murder, the treason, the mutiny!”
Ser Forley began to scream louder, “You call it what you want! You’re down there, we’re up here! You came into the wrong damn castle Ser!”
“Stand fast brothers!” Ser Tully alerted.
“Gods damn this, I am telling you this one last time. Order your men to drop their weapons to the deck.”
“So you could parade us as prisoners before executing us? I cannot give that order,” defied the Blackfish.
“I am not going to repeat that order!”
“I WILL NOT GIVE THAT ORDER!” Thunder boomed again.
“WHAT IN SEVEN HELLS IS WRONG WITH YOU? THIS IS USELESS!”
“STAND FAST!”
“ONE LAST TIME! ORDER YOUR MEN TO –“
“Ser Forley!” an unfamiliar voice called. “Queen Stark and her group are spotted. They are escaping on a rowboat at sea below. They appear to be heading west,” the watchman said.
Edwyn Frey’s voice commanded, “Archers, to the western edge! Kill them! Kill them all!!”
“BROTHERS! Kill the watcher first and anyone on that western edge!” the Blackfish thundered in the order.
A quick shoosh was heard above and a cry of pain immediately sounded from the west, as a body thumped and squished onto the lower muddy ground.
And suddenly the air was filled with it, as the thunderstorm raged on.
Shoosh shoosh shooosh shooosh shoosh ahhhhhh ahhhhh shoooosh ahhhh shooooshhh shoosh boom doom boom doom boom doom shooosh shooosh ahhhhhhh boom doom boom!
The heavens exploded from above, illuminating Olyvar’s drain instant after instant. Men were heard screaming and dying in agony. Whether or not it was his brothers or his foes, Olyvar couldn’t tell. He caught a glimpse of three bolts speeding above his small hole in different directions, and knew there were a hundred more he could not see. The enemy has the high-ground, Olyvar remembered, all my brothers are probably dying. He was unsure whether to descend down or ascend up the ladder into the chaos. He started to tear up, the cold rain still soaking his face as lightning continued to flashed and thundered through the pit above him.
“GOOSE!!!” Leo’s voice screamed. No!
“LEO TAKE COVER!”
“KEEP LOOSING BRO—AHHHHH!”
“FATHER!!”
“BROTHER, NO!!”
“TO THE WEST! LOOSE! LOOSE! LOOSE! PROTECT YOUR QUEEN!!!”
“I’M GOING TO KILL YOU ALL YOU MOTHERF*CKERS!!!”
Men were still crying up there, along with the bass of the approaching storm, blending with the streak of arrows and bolts hitting stone, mud and flesh. Still clung to his ladder, Olyvar looked down cowardly as a teardrop fell off his face. It landed on Alesander.
“You fool, what are you doing here? You left the rowboat?”
“I came back to fight.”
“You are no fighter, you are a singer. Leave here. Escape into the tunnels and save yourself my brother.”
He hesitated to answer, his own tears trickling down. “Aye, I will. And when I leave here, I’ll sing about what has happened today, what is still happening above us.” The screams were not stopping. Bolts, arrows and curses could still be heard flying above. Alesander moved towards a fissure in the cavern wall, spying to the west. “The Queen should be far out of harm’s way. The winds are kind, and the bolts are missing its mark away from the LionsJape.” He walked back to him. “Come with me Olyvar if you want to live.”
“Soon. But not yet. I need to hold this ladder. Leave my brother. Sing about this and immortalize our sacrifice.”
“Don’t go.” He grabbed Olyvar’s leg.
“Just let go of me!” Olyvar winched free.
“If you can escape, escape. I’ll fly away now. Farewell my honorable brother.”
“Wait!” Olyvar almost forgot. “Do you know what it is?”
His brother smiled a smile that Olyvar will never forget. “We have a Stark princess.” His footsteps faded into echoes as Alesander descended into the darkness of the tunnels.
But Olyvar began the climb in his. The hole above was gaping wider with each slow step up, ready to swallow him whole. Olyvar trembled. Besides the flashes of lightning, he could not see what was going on, but he could feel it in the air. He can taste the rain from above. He can hear the music of defiance to House Lannister, the sounds of arrows and loud screams drowning into silence. He can even smell it too. The smell of the Rock cooked with the salt of the sea, the iron of his brothers’ blood, the piss & stool of honorable dead men, staining & stinking the courtyard of Tywin Lannister’s home, leaving Casterly Rock an empire of shit.
He stood on the one rung that exposed his head just above the ground. Bodies. Brothers’ bodies and bolts everywhere. Rain and blood soak the mud, and fading cries of pain filled his ears. He saw the Queen’s uncle and master schemer of this plan, Ser Rolph Spicer, had a bolt in his eye as he died by the kitchen doors. The Seashell Knight was lifeless with his face first in the middle of the mud near Olyvar’s pit. Donal with bolts to his shoulder, stomach, and legs was on one knee shouting & cursing as he continued to loose arrows from three quivers as his brothers Raff & Mikkal laid dead beside him. Lord Glover had two bolts in him and took another in the chest. He paced backwards and fell over the parapet into the sea. A bolt was stuck on Goose’s neck, as he and Leo rested motionless together at the foot of a column, sharing a single bolt that shot through their hearts. The shield that Leo had held up was decorated with a dozen bolts, but it was too late for the other ones that got through.
Olyvar’s soul ached in agony, the clutch of his hand shaking as he clung onto the ladder. A small pile of feathered Lannister men had fallen from the western balcony and onto the courtyard. But he could not feel the victory in it … not now, nor not yet, perhaps never. The rest of his brothers Olyvar could not see from his ladder, but he spotted a few arrows still loosing up to the second floor behind cover, still fighting back. It is so few. Many more bolts were still shooting down from the top. Crossbowmen hid as they reloaded, popping up to release before ducking again.
He spotted Ser Brynden Tully the Blackfish crawling towards him, needled like a red porcupine blowfish. “Olyvar!” He hooted bluntly. “Why are you still here?” Olyvar’s heart quenched at the sight of the blood of Riverrun; his pink life flowing in a thin river and draining out towards his ladder. The water-downed blood reached Olyvar’s fingers. He wanted to help but did not know how, nor know the words. He offered his hand and Ser Tully held it. “Did she make it out to sea?”
“Yes Ser, she should be safe,” Olyvar prayed.
“So, do we have a prince or a princess? Or one of each? Heh!”
“Do not get greedy Ser,” Olyvar jested. “We have a she-wolf.”
The Blackfish smiled a hard smile with blood filling his mouth. “Good, they should be safer this way. And I hope she takes after her fierce grandmother.”
“Which one? Lady Catelyn Tully?”
“Of course heh. That would be a great granddaughter name for our storm-born she-pup … Catelyn,” the Blackfish joked.
Olyvar smiled while Ser Tully reciprocated a red one. “I like the name Adara.”
“Adara? That sounds like a wonderful name. Where did that come from?” Ser Tully asked, tearing and bleeding.
“It was Captain Samullu’s mother’s name.”
“Aye, that is a terrific name. Princess Adara Stark. Tell that to our Queen Jeyne that I concur to the name choice, pass that final message of mine. Now fly along Ser Olyvar, escape here, reunite with your Queen and protect your family. There is nothing left to do here but die, so fly! Let the divine swift winds of winter push Adara to safety. You have King Robb’s spirit within you. The babe does not have a father nor Grey Wind, so you must keep her safe.”
“We are all her fathers,” Olyvar declared.
The Blackfish grinned, knowing Olyvar probably out teased him in his final moments. “No … a band of fathers brothers? That would make us a band of uncles.” He chuckled bloodily.
Olyvar laughed and teared a drop. “That was a very clever. Just don’t tell Lady Mormont.”
“Don’t worry fellow Uncle, I won’t.”
“It has been an honor fighting by your side, Ser Uncle Brynden Tully, the great Blackfish.”
“It has been an honor living by yours, Ser Uncle Plumber Knight,” the legend replied.
He watched the knight’s life wash away, his last breath tasting the rains of Casterly Rock. The legendary Ser Brynden’s last words were for me. Wells flooded in Olyvar’s eyes, beginning to blind. He lets go of his hands.
He takes a few steps down the ladder, and then suddenly stops. What honor is this? Leaving my brothers and my commander like this? Am I a little cowardly rat of a ratty family, hiding in a tunnel? Or am I a brave knight?
The thunder and rain continued, but the arrows have stopped. Nothing but silence, only stares if Olyvar had to guess. His brothers were all dead. I need to get up. One step up and he suddenly stopped again. No, I need to escape and protect my Queen, does that make me a coward?
He checked his pocket and made sure his letter to his father sat below his heart. It was still there. Olyvar’s grip on the rung was firm and quivering.
To flee or not to flee? That is the riddle.
“Soldiers! To the lower floor! Grab their bows and quivers. Get down that ladder, find a boat, chase Queen Stark and kill them! Kill them all!” Edwyn Frey’s voice ordered.
Well, that made answering the riddle a lot easier.
Ser Olyvar Frey ascended from the pit of his ladder, his arms pulling, legs pushing, up and up into the chaos. The thunderstorm loomed above as his soul was escaping into the hole that was gaping wider with every step. He was ready.
At the ground level, he stood up. Cold rain and warm tears danced down his face, his cloak whipping in the air to the winds, his heart and fists began to fill with fiery rage. From up here, he can see the full horror of the slaughter. Brothers with bolts. Was this the same scene of my King’s death? Before he could ponder any further, he unsheathed Honor from his back, the sword was singing off its scabbard just as a bolt of lightning ripped across the sky … its twin mirrored off the steel’s reflection, the blade alive with blinding light for an instant.
Ser Olyvar counted the ill-fitted armored and shield-less men as they came pouring out from the kitchen doors at his level. Two, three, four, five, six … seven. Thin white stripes splits the sky. His heart was thumping and rumbling to the same beat of the thunderstorm that was mumbling in every distance.
I’m going to fight them all, no soldier in any Seven Kingdom army can hold me back!
The distance between the first unarmed man closed. His shocked face eyed Ser Olyvar’s new twin tower sigil on his cloak. Confused, he began to slow down, but Olyvar sped up. He greeted him with a deep slash, ripping him off as the skies flashed again. He darted forward to the next man, allowing the first one to take his time dying behind his back.
The second reached for his sword but was too slow to the draw. Honor found the front of the pink man’s chest and the rear of his back. For a heartbeat, the bloody front half of the exposed steel glowed damped red, while the clean side sparkled in purple. Olyvar pulled back his sword after a twist, and the soldier dropped to his knees to the boom of thunder.
The third drew his sword halfway before Olyvar swung at his head as his steel electrified, emitting blinding light to his eyes. He smelled Honor up close with his nose, as a gash ran from ear to ear while teeth and tongue exploded in the air. Olyvar paid him no more mind.
The fourth with panicked eyes was just a boy. He successfully drew his weapon from his belt and lifted above his head a short wooden stick. A flute? He stared up at his own wind pipe as his sword rested in his scabbard untouched. Between his legs, his breeches began to darken more with moisture, as the rest of his body was frozen like ice. A fLuke? It doesn’t matter. The Plumber Knight began to raise Honor high. The boy cried out, “Mother have mer—“.
“No,” Olyvar cuts him off, his voice was cold as stones. “I am not your mother.” Honor fell in a bright silvery-blue arc as the force of the blade severs the soldier’s right stick-bearing wrist, and splits the skull & brains underneath. Ser Olyvar Frey kicked off the mayhaps-fourth-corpse as its limp body slid from his red wet steel.
The fifth one was ready with his sword, as the sixth and seventh began pincering around Ser Olyvar with theirs. The rain began pouring heavily, cleansing the blood and brains off Honor, ready to shine again.
Olyvar’s wits returned from his blind rage, and began backing up calmly before they could surround him. The rear of his heel tapped a fallen shield that once belong to one of his brothers. Olyvar grabbed it instinctively and raised it up. “Come on you apes! Do you want to live forever? Come at me then!” No one came forward to answer the riddle, so Ser Olyvar went to them.
He charged at the one on his right as Honor slashed and flashed, but the soldier jolted backwards avoiding the swing. The shifty swordsman slipped on the surface with his hop and fell face-first into the mud. The other two took their chances when Olyvar swung and missed. He caught the cut of the left soldier on his shield, as the middle fighter aimed high. To the ground, the knight ducked under, saving his head. The middle slugger lost his balance at his empty decapitating slice, and a crouching Olyvar stroke savagely at his knees in a splash of red and bright purple. He fell face-first too, as the other soldier on his left began hacking at the wooden shield that Olly held up. Doonk! Doonk! Doonk! Before his challenger could swing a fifth time, Olyvar Frey on one knee whirled the apex of his shield viciously at the man’s wrist and sent the sword flying from his hand. Without hesitation, the Plumber Knight stabbed upwards from crotch to brains as the steel surprised the man with shock. Olyvar stares into the white of his eyes as they reflected a flash of lightning. The eyeballs then slowly rolled up into the back of his head. He unsheathed Honor downward from the dead man, as blood and shit fell like loose stool to the ground.
The other fighter with no knees rolled around to face up before he could drown in the mud. He was crying and screaming on the ground. “Nooooo!” But the Plumber Knight jumped on him without mercy. He tried to dart and evade, but forgot he had no knees to push from. Olyvar’s feet stomped the man’s stomach as he thunder-slammed the edge of his shield to kiss his opponent’s mouth, silencing him forever.
The first armed man that dodged his death finally got up from his struggles with the slippery ground, only to meet at it again. Soaking in mud, he began to bull-rush Olyvar, trying to stab or slash an opening with his sword. Olyvar dashed towards him in squishing strides, and took his charging strike at his Brother’s shield as he stepped aside. The former squire of Robb Stark, Olly, instantly planted his foot and twirled. His Queen’s wet cloak spun and smacked his opponent’s head. Suddenly the Plumber Knight had the enemy’s rear and naked. He lifted his King’s sword up, pointing down with both his hands on the grip. Ser Olyvar and thunder roared together as Honor brightly stabbed from above into the mudman’s back with the flash and fury of the gods. “AHHHHHHHHH!!!”
He lifted his sword back up as the seventh corpse fell to the ground, face-first again. Suddenly a mosquito buzzed from behind his ear and a short wooden stick skidded off the flat stone-path in front of him. He then felt a bite in his back, lost a breath and saw another wooden rod. But this one was lodged in his right breast. Red blood slowly began to seep from his black scaled boiled-leather armor as he grunted in pain. He reached for the stick trying to push it backwards from where it came from. Quickly he felt the pain again as he saw another bolt stab the front of his stomach while his Brother’s shield slid off from this left forearm. The third one struck the side of his left thigh, sending Ser Olyvar to the ground on one knee. He braced on his King’s sword to keep him from falling flat.
“Cease fire! Cease fire!” Ser Forley Prester ordered.
Cold rain danced on his face with the warm tears he tried to hide, his cape was flapping in the wind, and his heart was thumping quicker in unison to the beat & the flash of the storm. Ser Olyvar Frey, you honorable fool, why did you rush in? You can’t help yourself falling in love with bloody vengeance for your fallen brothers and King? For an instant, lightning popped again above the Rock and thunder rolled. You should have taken your time killing them as they descended down your pit, instead of you going up the ladder to their chaos. Frey blood, -no … blood of Roses By another name welled from the bolts that had punched him. He had known nothing half gallant and half stupid at the same time for what he just did. Or at least you could have flown away, such a fool! You should of just beat it. No one wanted to be defeated like this. Why did you have to show off how funky strong your fighting skills were? At this point, it doesn’t matter who’s wrong or who’s right … you should of just beat it!
Ser Forley Prester spoke from his balcony above. “You must be the Plumber Knight that the Blackfish talked about, judging by the sigil on your cape. A traitor to your own family. But for the honor of your lord grandfather, let us pass and I will let the maester do his job to save you. Or would it please you Ser, if you wanted some more bolts?”
More? Olyvar twisted his mouth in defying silence, his gruesome wounds spitting out blood. He had a job that he promised to do. He must rescue his pregnant Queen. Little did he know, he had to rescue a princess from this castle too. We all died for Robb’s little girl, there was no more to ask of them. Did these uncles succeed for her safety? He turned around to the west to see as far as his eyes could see into the sun setting sea. Her boat was far enough from any archers, and soon it would be too dark for a chase. The thought brought him joy. Thank the gods for this swift divine wind. We did our duty.
Impatient for a reply, the shit knight said, “I will not ask again. Knight to knight. Let us pass. We need to take back the Queen and her unborn son. I will bring them no harm, you have my word. Drop your sword, bend the knee like you mean it, let us pass … and I will tell Lord Walder Frey what an honorable warrior and a great grandson you are.”
That offer was a lie, a conjurer’s cheap trick. They would just humiliate and shame him before executing him for treason. That was not the song he wanted, not for his despicable old father. Olyvar would rather die sword in hand to the tune of another. He wanted Alesander’s song about the Motherfunker, Ser Brynden “Blackfish” Tully, his real brothers and the band of uncles. And he had one last shot, one last opportunity, to seize everything he ever wanted here. In this one moment, can I still capture it? Or will I let it slip? His palms were bloody, knees weak, arms were heavy … but the Queen and Princess are safe. Mother’s mercy. He was nervous, but on the surface, he looks calm and ready to drop bombs. But he had forgotten what he wrote down in his father’s letter, as the crowds above goes so loud. He opens his mouth but the words won’t come out. He is choking. How? Everyone was joking now.
“Your luck has run out. The time’s up, it is over SER Olyvar. Bow.”
No. I refuse to BOW Ser. And I cannot die yet. There is something I still need to do. Both hands on hilt and pommel, he pushes himself up with Honor, surrounded by the doom above. He can feel his life leaving him. The skies blurred between light and dark, white and grey, with the black slowly creeping in.
“It’s a girl,” Uncle Olyvar said gently as he thought about his princess niece. The Plumber Knight then roared a roar that would put any craven into tears. “AND NO! YOU SHALL NOT PASS!” Honor rose and fell, the pointy end of his King’s sword squishing the blood soaked mud and crunching the rocks underneath.
KABOOOOOOOMMMM!!!
Instantly, lightning and thunder erupted above them at the loudest exploding caliber of the evenfall, blinding the sights of men and gods alike.
Uhoooooooooo! boom doom boom doom boom doom
Suddenly drums were beating, and trumpets were blasting from the east. Lord Gawen Westerling’s diversion! But they’ve come too late to rescue Olyvar and his brothers. The enemy did not divert to their last jape yet … their silent scared eyes still on the dying Plumber Knight. They began to reload their crossbows. This is my moment. The things I do for love, but I’m sorry Jeyne, I can’t do that. I can no longer keep my promise. Robb was waiting and I can finally rest again. We three will meet again together some day, but not today, he thought*.*
The band of drums, trumpets and thunderstorm blended into a sweet sad song that Olyvar wanted. This music is for me, and I will lose myself in it.
Charging up his final energy into his wounded lungs, he began to scream again.
“OUR QUEEN— ” A howl of blood cuts him off from finishing what he meant to say … our Family is safe.
“OUR KING—” A pool of iron filled and choked him before he could declare … we have done our Duty.
Still standing, he dips his chin low to empty his mouth, coughing out his mother’s Rosby blood. He needs to say his final words loud and clear. After the last spoon of blood poured down, he snapped his chin up towards the heavens and reality … ready for the gravity. With all the weight of his life, he pressed his King’s sword deeper into the Rock as the Plumber Knight thundered a roar, “OUR HONORRRRR!!!”
From below, Ser Olyvar of the disgraced House Frey faced off to the sad conflicted look of Ser Forley Prester with his garrison of archers beside him. The darkest gloom of the grey stormclouds had arrived and hovered above them, wet and heavy. The gods want their vengeance for the Red Wedding, he thought. The skies of Casterly Rock began to blacken with the rain of bolts and arrows. The only thing that could be seen is the single golden teardrop of the shit knight, reflected by the last light of the setting western sun.
BOOM!
THANK YOU FOR READING.

What’s up everyone. I was watching Richard Newton’s video the other day and he happened to mention that the best way to learn is to teach.
I happen to think he’s correct.
After watching DFV turn $53k into a potential trillion dollar payout, I decided that I need to learn to wield this insane power.
I’ve seen similar sentiment on here, so I decided that I should start learning and simultaneously teach what I learn so I can best understand it.
So, if you want to follow along, I’ll be making it a series and I’m going to try to be as consistent as possible. Perhaps once per week.
I know we don’t like options here, historically, but I think we’ve mastered Buy, Hold, DRS, Shop, and I think that we’ve built and incredible wall of defense.
But now, I personally want to start going on offense. It’s not just because DFV. That Ken Griffin video today fired me up and I went straight to reading. So, feel free to dive in with me if you’d like. I’ll probably keep doing it even if no one reads or if I get downvoted to hell.
Hopefully I’m not banned (mods 🙏).
Aight let’s do it.

Lesson One

Introduction to Options

Imagine you’re planning a trip to Grapevine to the future annual GME shareholders meeting and you’re unsure if the price of airline tickets will go up or down. Wouldn't it be great if you could pay a small fee to lock in a ticket price now, but decide later if you actually want to buy it? (Side note: In the current market for GME, due to extremely elevated implied volatility (IV), it's actually a pretty big fee. It doesn’t sound like the right time to buy but smarter apes can tell us if we are wrong!)
That’s essentially what an option is in the stock market—a way to manage your investment risks and opportunities without making a full commitment upfront. Also, a way to buy 100 tickets at that price, just in case you want to invite your local apes along.

Types of Options: Calls and Puts

1. Call Options:
   • Purpose: A call option gives you the right to buy a stock at a specific price, known as the strike price, before the option expires. Think of it as a reservation to buy a stock at a locked-in price.
   • Example: Let’s say you buy a call option for GME with a strike price of $50. If the stock’s market price rises to $70, you can still buy it at $50.

Around here, we like to mention that exercise this option is usually more beneficial than selling the option because it lands you 100 new shares to add to your stick pile and puts pressure on short sellers, as Thomas Petterffy from IBKR highlighted after the January 2021 GME sneeze. Watch his explanation here.

1. Put Options:
   • Purpose: A put option gives you the right to sell a stock at a specific price before the option expires. This is like having an insurance policy for your stock.
   • Example: If you own GME and it’s currently worth $50, you might buy a put option with a strike price of $50. If the stock’s price drops to $30, you can still sell it at $50. It’s like having the option to sell your house at its current market value even if the market crashes and house prices fall.

Typically this is a bearish bet. Probably won’t be used much around here, but I could see a scenario where you could time the OPEX tailwinds we’ve been seeing and pick up some extra cash for the next set of shares you’d like to buy. Yeah, I know that sounds kind of shitty, but I wouldn’t be surprised at all if that helped super charge RK’s gains the last 3 years. I’m pretty certain it’s what hedgies are doing to profit from the cycles.

Key Terms

• Strike Price: The price at which you can buy (call) or sell (put) the stock. This is your locked-in price.
• Expiration Date: The last date by which you can exercise your option. Think of it as the expiry date on a coupon. But if you’re OTM (read below) at expiry, you lose your premium, so as Roaring Kitty mentioned THIS IS REALLY RISKY. I don’t plan on buying options for a while as I am new to this and I’m poor at the moment.
• Premium: The cost of buying the option. It’s like paying for that airline ticket reservation or insurance policy.
• In-the-Money (ITM): When exercising the option is profitable. For calls, the stock price is above the strike price. For puts, the stock price is below the strike price.
• Out-of-the-Money (OTM): When exercising the option would not be profitable.
• At-the-Money (ATM): When the stock price is equal to the strike price.

How Options Work

1. Buying Options:
   
   • Action: You pay a premium to get the right to buy (call) or sell (put) the stock.
   • Outcome: If the stock moves in your favor, you exercise the option; if not, you let it expire and lose only the premium paid.
2. Selling (Writing) Options:
   
   • Action: You receive a premium but take on the obligation to fulfill the option if the buyer decides to exercise.
   • Outcome: If the stock moves against you, the potential losses can be substantial. Imagine you sold an insurance policy and the event happens—you have to cover the claim. So if GME runs higher than your strike price, you need to provide those shares (you lose 100 shares from your brokerage).

Why Use Options?

1. Leverage: Options allow you to control a larger amount of stock with a smaller investment. It’s like putting a small deposit down on a house and gaining from its full market value increase. We also heard from Kenny G that they are required to hit the list exchange unlike the sale of shares.
2. Hedging: Options can protect your investments from adverse price movements, just like insurance protects your car from damage.
3. Income Generation: Writing options can generate additional income through premiums. However, this is akin to collecting insurance premiums—potentially lucrative but risky if claims arise.

Risks and Rewards

• Potential for High Returns: Leverage can magnify your gains. Small movements in the stock price can lead to significant profits.
• Limited Loss for Buyers: The maximum loss for the option buyer is the premium paid.
• Unlimited Loss for Sellers: Writing options, especially naked options (looking at you, people selling those 6/21 calls), can lead to unlimited losses.

Pricing Factors

1. Intrinsic Value: The difference between the stock’s current price and the strike price.
2. Time Value: The portion of the premium that reflects the time remaining until expiration. The longer the time, the higher the potential for profitable price movements.
3. Volatility: Higher volatility means higher premiums, as the stock is expected to swing more in price. Again, the GME IV sounds like it’s incredibly high at the moment.
4. Interest Rates and Dividends: These also play a role in option pricing, though typically to a lesser extent.

Conclusion

I believe this lays out the fundamental principles of options. I am interested in learning more about these because they can be powerful tools for leveraging positions, hedging risks, and generating income, but they come with significant risks. I don’t think anyone should go YOLO after reading this. This is just the start of my learning and maybe yours as well.
First understanding the basics of how options work, the terminology, and the strategic uses seems essential to me for any investor looking to incorporate options into their portfolio.
Important Note: As I mentioned earlier, if you’re ever considering selling an option, remember that exercising could be far better for securing your profits and putting pressure on short sellers, as Thomas Petterffy from IBKR explained in his video after the January 2021 GME sneeze. Watch his explanation here if you didn’t earlier. Shares are forever, options expire. MOASS could be tomorrow or it could be tomorrow’s tomorrow.

Coming Up Next

In the next lesson, I think I’ll probably jump into the specifics of pricing options and the factors that affect an option’s value. That’ll mean discussing the Greeks—Delta, Gamma, Theta, Vega, and Rho.
Anyone with more wrinkles, I welcome your critiques and help!
Premarket opens in 12 hours. Get some rest as it’s gonna be a wild week.
And in the meantime, if you want to mess around with pricing ahead of time, this tool is great for that. https://www.optionsprofitcalculator.com/

this is a counter cultural sub. In order to live in a counter-cultural fashion, it should surprise you that you should consider some counter cultural personal finance advice.
While this book wasn't written specifically for single income families, the author directed common personal finance misconceptions and philosophies that would benefit any individual who wishes to minimize their *financial stress*. This is a very important distinction from all the get rich quick books.
The following are my takeaways
Financial stress
You can be a billionaire with a lot of stress, or a making minimum wage but having little to no stress. Stress comes from your risk exposure, and your legal obligations.
Most important rule to remember: Personal finance is determined by the selected few big decisions you make, such as

• the house you buy
• the college you go to
• the person you marry
• the career you choose
• the car you drive
  This is where all the mainstream gurus are wrong. Small habits, such as a coffee or an avocado toast, don't matter. Stop stressing yourself over hundreds of small decisions. If you manage to save hundreds by buying a reliable car without a high interest loan, you can easily afford your coffee.
  

Psychologically, it is much easier to forego large luxuries (a mega mansion) than small, inexpensive luxuries. Read the book to find out more.
How to minimize financial stress

• Do not fall for predatory loans, e.g. car loans
• Read the agreements you are about to sign. If your hands are shaking, it means you understand what you're getting into
• Ideally, your home/rent should be kept at 20% of your monthly income. If you are in a HCOL area, find a cheap house or move. Don't make yourself miserable.
• When a friend or a family member asks for money, the relationship is over. Don't try to salvage it.

How to manage your risk
The author provides a portfolio at the end of the book. I am not sharing it here because I'm not sure if I can. However, I can share that the author pointed out most conventional portfolios don't work IRL. The math works like so, buy the stock market index, and ride through the ups and downs. Eventually, you will profit. It is crucial to note that this doesn't happen IRL. The vast majority will panic buy selling the low, and only buying the high. The theoretical dollar cost averaging almost never happens.
Another idea that stands out to me: try to pay down your mortgage early.
Say you have a 6% mortgage. If you paid the principal early, you saved 6% interest down the road. That is a guaranteed 6% return. My personal interpretation is that this is also an insurance policy for yourself. You don't know what will happen in 30 years. Paying it down earlier rather than later is the sane thing to do. Paying only the minimum and investing in volatile assets are irrational.

TITLE CORRECTION: TWOW Prologue Theory and Fan-Fic, 2 of 4

It is one full chapter, but because it is so long, I broke into four parts.
This is a theory for the actual Prologue of The Winds of Winter. Please enjoy. This is Part 2 of 4.
The Winds of Winter
Prologue
[Part 1]
My king. The sad memories faded into blurred flashbacks.
Olyvar cherished the sweet time as his grace’s squire. Though two years older, it made no matter. A warrior king was training Olyvar the way of knighthood, almost any boy’s dream. He remembered on slow days, Robb Stark would spend time with him, teaching the art of the long sword and shield. He can still remember the cloudy day at the Crag’s courtyard and his Northern accent as he swung his blade at the squire. “Keep your shield up Olyvar. Keep it up.”
“It’s too heavy.” Olyvar replied as Robb swung on.
“If it wasn’t heavy, it wouldn’t stop a sword. So get it up.”
They sparred and sparred in the courtyard. Robb Stark was dancing with him, hilts in hands. After he knocked Olyvar to the dirt for the twentieth time, he lifted him back up.
“Come, drive at me.” Robb then grabbed Olyvar gently by the back of his neck. “Look Olly, keep your shield up or I’ll ring your head like a bell.”
Olyvar never forgot that moment, his Grace’s right-hand touch, the way Robb looked into his eyes and called him ‘Olly’. No one has ever called him that and he liked it very much. They continued to dance. Rain began to fall, turning dirt into mud. Olyvar darted at him. Robb stepped aside, deflecting the stab off his shield and twirled around forward in a natural motion, his cloak spinning in the air. Before Olyvar knew it, Robb had his rear, his sword ready to thrust or slash any part of him. He glanced back and knew he was lost. The dance paused there and Olyvar turned around to meet Robb’s beautiful blue eyes. He could melt in them.
“You had me your Grace.”
“Come Olly, it’s your turn.” A winter wind came blowing in from across the sea. A breeze lingered there, brushed Robb’s auburn hair. “Now, dance with me!”
It almost felt like a sin to be as excited as Olly was at that moment.
“I’ll drive to you now. Try to do what I just did. In mud like this, don’t forget to plant your foot before each movement. And remember, you have to keep your shield up.”
As Olyvar and Robb got into their positions, his older half-nephew Ser Ryman Frey suddenly appeared and intervened. He grabbed Olyvar like a little green boy and pulled him towards the exit. NO! Olyvar’s word caught in his mouth.
Robb spoke up for him. “What are you doing? Olyvar is my squire and a grown man. He can do what he wants and speaks for himself.”
“My grandfather has declared a suspension of your alliance with House Frey,” Ryman said. “You have broken a sacred vow. If you would not have his daughter or granddaughter as your queen, you certainly cannot have his son as your squire.”
Robb was expecting Olyvar to say something, but the squire froze. More Frey guardsmen came in and dragged him away from the courtyard, his heels lifeless on the ground, leaving twin mud tracks on his departure. Robb stared at him sweet, sad, and silent. A bolt of lightning flashed across the rainy skies, its reflection off the King’s sword blinding Olyvar. That was the last time he saw Robb alive.
When news of his King returning to the Twins for the wedding between Lord Edmure Tully and his sister Roslin, Olyvar could not contain his excitement, to hear the voice of his call.
Since that rainy courtyard day, Olyvar had been on his own for long enough. He hoped maybe Robb could show him again that dance that he loved. Maybe. Olyvar had been going through withdrawals. Not seeing his Grace was just too much. He could turn me on with the slightest touch. But since the Red Wedding, Olyvar’s courtyard has been cold and empty. F\ck anyone who judges me. He couldn’t see clearly now that Robb was forever gone. Olyvar was still blinded by Robb’s last light. He couldn’t sleep, still yearning for his touch. In his heart, rain constantly fell, drowning him in the nights. I was his squire, Olyvar cried as his soul twisted. And I failed him. I was the only one that night he could trust.*
After the slaughter, Merrett Frey, a kin of his, greeted him as he released Olyvar from the dungeons. “I’m sorry Olyvar that we had to lock you up, Perwyn and Alesander too. But you must do your duty for your family. You are a Frey, a man of an honorable house. This stain left by Robb Stark and his b*tch mother Catelyn Tully should not go unpunished. Lady Catelyn also killed Jinglebells. She even japed ‘a son for a son*‘* to our Lord father as she slit his throat.”
A son for a son. Olyvar Frey looked at Merrett sullenly, his voice choking up, “I must go for a walk.” Olyvar walked and walked … passing the burnt tents, passing the dead soldiers with Northern and Riverland sigils sewn on their garments, and passing Grey Wind’s headless body. He was far enough from home, but he could still hear the cheap cheers of the Frey and Bolton soldiers.
He fell to his knees and began to cry. My king. My sweet king. Olyvar swore vengeance. Though he will never consider kinslaying as it was a curse among the gods, it would not stop him from facilitating others who seek revenge against his own family, the ones who were directly involved.
Suddenly at the side of the river, a dying man was crawling towards him. Soaked in water, mud and blood, he cried out in a ghastly voice “Olyvar!”
“Who, who are you?” Olyvar sprinted to aid and for recognition. “Raynald?” Without hesitation Olyvar replied, “My brother!” He placed himself under Raynald’s shoulder and lifted him up. “We need to find a maester.”
On the way back to camp, Olyvar and Raynald encountered two sentries of his Frey household guards, far from any other eyes can see.
“So what do you have here my Lord Olyvar?” one asked.
“A dying lone wolf? Let us put him out of his misery,” the other replied as they stared at Ser Raynald Westerling’s dampened seashell surcoat.
Olyvar lowered himself and laid Ser Raynald on the ground, and arose in a tone cold as stone. “No. Not a lone wolf.”
Olyvar unsheathed his sword and killed both Frey guards before they could reach their weapons. He then swapped Raynald’s wet Westerling clothing for one of the dead men, and found a maester.
Ser Raynald Westerling stayed with Olyvar at the Twins under disguise. He even trimmed off his brushy moustache. Weeks later after Ray had fully healed, he asked Olyvar to go with him to look for Maege Mormont and Galbart Glover at their secret hideout, as per the original plan before the wedding.
One night, Olyvar Frey simply walked out of the Twins again, this time with Ray. No one would care where Olyvar was going. Truth be told, his Frey family would be more content if more spawnlings of their lord father would leave the castle to find their own destiny, especially if they were unlikely heirs deep behind the line of succession.
Aboard one of the Northern galleys floating outside of Seagard, the Seashell Knight had to explain how this son of Walder Frey earned his trust, as Lady Mormont held Olyvar by the throat with a dagger. The skin around her eyes had been raked and blackened with tears and nails, her teeth bit with furious anger. She had been like this for weeks. Olyvar stared at her face and he felt like he could die here and now, if that was what it meant for Lady Mormont to forgive him, as he knows no gold would ever substitute for her grief. “I am sorry about your daughter Dacey. I lost my brother too. Benfred was a good man, I swear to you by all the gods old and new, that he did not have a part in the slaughter. Benfred would have done everything he could to grab an innocent woman like Dacey, and bring her safe from harm.” Olyvar meant it.
Mormont sheathed her dagger, her hands still shaking. “I’ll kill them all! Anyone who was a part of this!”
“No.” Olyvar replied. “We have to get the girls back. And then you can kill them all.”
At the siege of Riverrun, Olyvar Frey freely roamed Ryman’s uncoordinated camp. No one cared. One night alone, he swam across the moat and climbed up the castle with spikes. Only thirty feet up, the Tully guards had heard him clanking and aimed their crossbows from above. “Identify yourself!”
He whispered, “I am Olyvar Frey, son of Walder Frey, former squire to his King, Robb Stark. I come unarmed and offer myself as a hostage. I know the Blackfish, please let him know I am here.”
“Stay where you are.”
Olyvar clung to the castle’s wall half way down to death and half way up to forgiveness. Finally Ser Brynden Tully appeared and told Olyvar to come up quietly. As Olyvar threw himself over the parapet and onto the floor, the Blackfish kicked away his spikes and immediately kneed his body to the ground, holding a dagger at his throat. Shit, not again! Damn this mayhaps, why was I unblessed to be born a Frey?
“What are you doing here, Olyvar Frey?” Ser Tully demanded.
Olyvar told them the truth and handed him Lady Maege’s letter from a waterproof compartment in his garment. The letter was coded with secret words that he and she only knew. The Blackfish cracked the seal, unrolled the parchment and read. Afterwards he released the grip from the bottom and the message curled up on its own, eager to protect the secrets.
“The paper curls, at least you didn’t try to deceive me with the age of the parchment.” He then asked Olyvar, “So, you killed some of your own men did you?”
“To save Ser Westerling, yes.” The Blackfish looked at his eyes and nodded in approval. “May I see her now?” Olyvar inquired.
The Tully guards led Olyvar to her room. Some left the area, but others stayed and watched, still suspicious of the unarmed Frey. She was in her solar, knitting her needle works. He fell down to one knee towards his niece-in-law (by Olyvar’s brother-in-law, Lord Edmure Tully), “My Queen.”
“Olyvar!” Without a hint of hesitation or mistrust, she dropped her needle, ran towards him, and wrapped her loose skinny arms strongly under his’. She poured her heart, soul and grief-filled life into a Rose By the name of Olyvar Frey. He reciprocated, placing his arms around her shoulders as Jeyne Westerling-Stark continued to hold tight. Her orange sized breasts pushed against his chest, as the Queen’s chestnut mop of brown hair sat below Olyvar’s clean-shaven chin.
“Robb.” It was all she needed to say as they shared a sob. Nothing hurt more than that moment when he shared the same pain with Jeyne. Olyvar dipped his head to hers, their salty tears finally uniting and slowly dancing together as their faces pressed cheek to cheek.
“He is in the heavens now, I believe, singing from above.” Olyvar prayed. “He will be waiting for us. No doubt we will see him again some day, but we must make him wait.”
“I miss him so much,” Jeyne cried. She was always cheerful with Olyvar since they first met. Though he was curious whether she truly loved Robb or just wanted to be a queen, she has repeatedly been kind to him, so sweet. She never intervened when Robb trained Olyvar at swordplay and he was grateful for that. When they wed, Olyvar knew Robb could never be his brother, but Jeyne did not seem to mind letting him continue to squire beside her much younger brother, Rollam Westerling. Robb had allowed Olyvar to protect the queen sometimes, along with the other household guards, though he was still training at arms. Olyvar and Jeyne would talk constantly, mostly about their King. Even when Jeyne rambles about him, she would always shy away from talking about Robb’s bed manners. But Olyvar insisted he did not mind hearing it. Jeyne felt like a sister to him, just as much or more as Roslin.
“I miss him too,” Olyvar replied. “Did you really love him?”
She cried a little bit louder and squeezed Olyvar even harder. “With all my heart.”
Olyvar wanted to confess too, but he could not do it here, not with everyone watching. He only hoped Jeyne would ask him the same, and she did. “Did you really love him, Olyvar?”
He tightened his grip on Jeyne’s shoulders. “More than you ever know.”
She gently reached for his hands and lowered them. “Olyvar, you were his squire. He is gone now. But you still have a duty to us. You must protect us. We must never separate again. Promise me Olyvar. Promise me.”
“No. I cannot. Not yet. I must leave you, just this one last time, for your safety and your family’s.”
“You are part of my family,” the Queen proclaimed. Tears rolled down again, their hands still held together at their hips.
“I need to leave Riverrun tonight. And I promise you, we will reunite again and I will keep you safe.”
They talked for hours about the good times, the horror, and what the future lies. They talked about Robb, crying to the sadness of him, exulting at his bravery and his glories, laughing at the silly juvenile things the teenager king did to entertain them, and about falling in love with him all over again. And then they cried some more.
Later on that night, Ser Brynden visited Jeyne and Olyvar, with Lady Eleyna and Lady Sybell watching. “Olyvar, you were the King’s squire and though he is no longer with us, you are still owed a knighthood. Let the gods curse me if I ever knighted a Frey, but you are no Frey I have ever known. What you are about to do would be considered treason to your family.”
“But my lord father was treasonous to my King. I do not get to choose my father or which family I was born into. But here right now, is the family I want to be with.”
“Will you honor your new family? Will you honor your duty to your late King, his Queen and his House, the Starks of Winterfell?”
“I do,” Olyvar replied with pride.
The Blackfish unsheathed his sword, the blade alive with moonlight gleaming from the window balcony. “Shit I think I’m doing this wrong. I was supposed to say that later. Anyways, kneel Olyvar Frey.”
Olyvar got to one knee as Queen Stark and all the others watched. Ser Brynden Tully, the legendary warrior Blackfish, placed the flat of his sword on Olyvar’s shoulder.
“I charge you to be brave and … aww shit the knighting words escape me. I’m embarrassing myself. Anyways um. Family! Honor! Duty!” He placed the blade on the other shoulder. “Shit, I forgot the rest of the speech. Forgive me. But Olyvar of House Frey, I name you a knight! Now rise!”
And arose the new knight stood, and proud he was. King Robb Stark could have never fulfilled his promise of a knighthood, but it was his father that took it away from him. But being knighted by the Blackfish was more than anything Olyvar wanted right now, besides keeping Queen Jeyne and his family safe. To him, it was forgiveness.
The Queen approached him with a longsword in scabbard, flat on both hands. “Our late King had a gift for you Ser Olyvar Frey, at least he would have wanted you to have it.”
Before Ser Olyvar received it, he already knew what it was. Robb’s sword. “No, I cannot. I am unworthy of this gift, his Grace’s sword.”
“This is King Robb Stark’s sword, and I am his Queen wife. I charge you to protect your family with his own sword.”
Queen Jeyne Stark made an offer that Ser Olyvar cannot refuse. He took the sword from her forgiving hands.
“What will you call it?” she asked.
“What do you mean?”
“A name. Robb never named his sword. But a good sword should have a good name.”
“I was told by my half-brothers that only cun–, I mean only women name their swords. I will let you name it, my Grace. How should we honor our late King Robb Stark?”
“It is honor,” Jeyne replied.
Confused, Olyvar asked, “What is honor?”
“A sword. This sword.”
Before the sun had dawned, Ser Olyvar Frey with Honor slung on his back, climbed down the castle walls with rope, swam under the moat again, and departed the birthplace of his King, Robb Stark, as a knight.
He returned to the Twins, keeping his knighthood a secret. When Riverrun had fallen to Ser Jaime Lannister, Edmure Tully had agreed to be a prisoner at Casterly Rock. Roslin Tully volunteered to join her husband, giving them a chance to raise a family together, even as hostages. Olyvar, their brother Perwyn and half-nephew Alesander all agreed to escort Lady Tully to the Westerlands. Although they told their half-family they would take the land-route for their journey; Olyvar, Perwyn, Alesander and Roslin had a different Frey destiny in mind. After the Kingslayer’s threat to Roslin’s unborn child, there was no day they would ever stay at Casterly Rock nor return to the Twins. They departed for the coast and reunited with Ser Brynden Tully, Lady Maege Mormont and Lord Galbart Glover aboard the Motherfunker.
Before Ser Brynden escaped Riverrun alone, he and Lord Tully reviewed all their options during Edmure’s short visit. An escape on land had many risks to be recaptured or killed, but at sea it was far fewer … and having a faster ship helped. They would allow Edmure and Jeyne to be peacefully escorted by their captors to Casterly Rock as hostages, only to be rescued from the shoreline. Lady Sybell Spicer swore her brother Ser Rolph would lead the way inside the caves. “Honor, not honors,” were House Westerling’s words. And Robb Stark showed more honor to Lady Sybell’s family than any of the other Westermen could. King Robb made her daughter a Queen, while King Tommen gifted Ser Rolph with the cursed ruins of Castamere from the notorious Lannister song. This honor was more of an insult than a reward.
One night aboard the Motherfunker, Olyvar took out a fresh new flat parchment to write a letter that was meant for his father. He held his feathered quill upright, but did not know how to start. He was fidgeting as he stared up around his cabin. He began to tap the pointy end of the quill and pricked his other hand by chance. Frey blood began to trickle from the wound along with a stinging pain. Cashing in on the moment, he then knew what to say. He dipped the blood smeared quill into the black inkpot, and began to pour his soul & anger onto the kin he no longer wanted.
Father, I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel. I focus on the pain, the only thing that is real. The needle tears a hole. This old familiar family sting. I try to forget it all the way. But I remember everything. I find myself asking … “What have I become? My sweetest King? Will everyone I love go away in the end?” And Father, you can have it all. My empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make it hurt. If I could start again, many miles back at home that night. To save my King, I would sacrifice myself. I would find a way. Your son Olyvar.
He rolled the parchment and laid a tablespoon of wax from his tallow candle at the edge. Olyvar pressed the button with his bleeding thumb, filling the stamp in a marble of white, red and pink; sealing it with his own blood. He placed the rolled parchment in his breast pocket, hoping to leave it somewhere in Casterly Rock and eventually reaching his father’s hands.
On the deck of the Motherfunker a few nights before … crewmen, Riverlands and Northern loyalists sang, drank, and cheered to the music of the masterplan. Though most wanted to spill blood to avenge the Red Wedding, humiliating their enemies would be the sweeter revenge: the story that sings in songs. But not all were there for vengeance. Some were just there for the adventure.
The Captain of the Motherfunker was there for the honor of joining their song. He wanted to look into the eyes of the lion, be a part of the thrill of the fight, rising up against our rivals. He also owed Ser Rolph Spicer a favor from their long smuggling history together at sea. If he helped rescue his niece Jeyne from the rocky castle, he would consider the debt paid, and the Black Sparrow was happy to oblige.
“So we are here to rescue this princess? No?” Samullu spoke in the broken Common Tongue
“No, not a princess, she is a queen,” Olyvar chatted.
“In the Summer Isles, a princess and a widowed queen is the same person. My father was king, but he died when I was a babe. My princess mother was the one who raised me after my uncle took the throne. I loved my mother. I named my swanship for her after she died a few years ago.”
“Motherfunker?” Olyvar asked. “What is a funker?”
“Where I am from, fighting and dancing is called the same thing. We call it funk. We funk to fight, we funk to dance, and we also funk to love. And the skill of our funk we always inherit from our mother’s side. I got it from my mama.” The black single-eyed captain pleaded. “Yo got yo from yo mama too. ‘Motherfunker’ is just a homage to one’s mother for giving us this art of our body’s motions.”
Olyvar never knew his mother, but he was very intrigued to hear more about Samullu’s and their culture. They chatted for quite a while.
Olyvar thanked him for helping them. But Samullu insisted it was the right thing to do after hearing about the horrors of the Red Wedding. “The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers! And yo will know I am the Captain when I lay my vengeance upon thee!”
Olyvar never knew the Black Sparrow was so pious to the gods of avengers.
Sharing rum together, Olyvar sung to him about his own story in depth. Captain Black Sparrow was impressed about his journey so far and he gave Olyvar a small jar of dirt. “This is soil from my empire back in the Summer Isle. I have a whole barrel of it to remind me of home. Here, take this other small gift as well.” He then took out a bird’s feather, long as a flute, bright and colorful. “We Summer Isle people have feathered cloaks, yo see it on all of us. But feathers like this one were meant for some of the bravest and baddest motherfunkers out there. I want yo to take it Ser Olyvar. Let it be yo warrior’s funk.”
Olyvar took it with his hand and gave it a warm stare. The feather was colored like a fading rainbow top to bottom, but the stem was yellow like a lemon. “Thank you.” The gifts were quite odd. By value it was not much, but it seemed like it meant a lot to the exiled prince, the type of gifts worth remembering.
“So what do yo need besides a miracle?” Samullu asked.
“Weapons. Bows and arrows. Lots of arrows.” Olyvar was serious.
“Aye, and I have a lot. Yo know, no one has ever done anything like what yo and the Blackfish’s men are about to do.”
“And that is why it will work.”
The plan was to allow Lord Edmure Tully and Queen Jeyne Stark to safely travel to Casterly Rock unmolested, under the command of Ser Forley Prester and his four hundred men. Lord Gawen Westerling and his son Rollam were to return to the Crag, but Lady Sybell was to stay with Jeyne, maintaining what deceptions she can conjure. Her bluff with Ser Jaime Lannister worked, earning the slightest trust from them before their escape at Casterly Rock. An attempt to rescue them on their path down the River Road would invite the Lannisters to execute the hostages on the spot, failing the objective’s purpose. To stealthily hunt down each soldier one by one would have proven even then, a mission of the impossible. Stirring fear in the hearts of the Lannister soldiers was the only solution, the effective psychological weapon. Ser Prester’s men have been haunted by the ghosts of the Brotherhood without Banners throughout the Riverlands, and the Blackfish would use that to his advantage. With the help of their fastest horse, Bubbles, mounted by Justin Smallister, a distant cousin to House Mallister of Seagard, he would tie empty nooses on trees ahead of Ser Forley’s route. The hope of the hoax would keep the Lannisters on edge, making it difficult to rest. Only when they reached the castle of Casterly Rock, they would drop their guards down, thinking the hard part was over. But on the exact evenfall on the day of their arrival, Lord Gawen Westerling and our small land forces, hidden in the eastern woods outside, would sound the trumpets and drums, drawing the weary soldiers to arms again. But the Blackfish was to infiltrate Casterly Rock from the western sea. Ser Rolph Spicer, our secret agent inside, will bond with Jeyne’s guards, drinking with them throughout their journey. Only on the hour of the escape, Ser Spicer would drug the guards’ ale, allowing them to fall asleep during the diversionary music. The Blackfish and his squad would provide armed escort, if needed. Ser Spicer would also help them navigate inside the caves, rescuing his niece Jeyne and their family back to the Motherfunker. By then, it would be too dark for the Lannisters to give chase into the ocean, if they even realized Queen Stark had flown off.
“I need twenty good men,” the Blackfish had demanded. A few hundreds of the remaining Stark loyalists and outlaws gathered at the docks, where the Motherfunker was anchored.
“And one more woman too!” the She-Bear crone proclaimed.
The men laughed in agreement as Ser Brynden continued. “I need volunteers only. Soldiers who want this fate to f*ck them from behind in their arses! For the twenty one of us, we will be in harm’s way, make no mistake about it. I do not expect us to be discovered, but if we were, our escape will not be easy like our brothers working the diversion in the woods. I need men quick on their feet, proficient with the bow, and skilled at close-quarter hand-to-hand combat. Who are my brave men that will be knocking on the Lannister’s doors?”
Ser Olyvar Frey thundered in first and raised his hand. Jeyne’s words echoed in his thoughts, Promise me Olyvar, promise me.
Alesander Frey surprised him. “No you fool! You are not a skilled fighter. Put your hand down!” Olyvar told his nephew.
“I am a grown man, and I will not miss this adventure for nothing,” Alesander protested to his uncle.
“You are just a singer.”
“Then I want to be a witness to this great deed and be the first singer of our new song.”
Olyvar could not stop his brother & nephew from doing something so stupid.
Ser Raynald Westerling the Seashell Knight raised his hand too, eager to save his sisters Jeyne and Eleyna, and his mother Sybell.
Others began to join. Some had their reasons, some had their vengeance, some just wanted to try something new.
Fess stepped up. He was a long lost uncle to Ser Addam Marbrand after a lengthy voyage at sea. But Ser Addam refused to believe him, denying him a small chunk of land near Ashemark that Fess was entitled to own. He called his uncle an imposter and casted him out of the region. Fess swore he was a Marbrand, and swore he would unleash a storm on their household if they did not give his piece of land back. To the future of reclaiming his name by shaming theirs, Fess Marbrand was recruited into our efforts against the Lannisters and their bannermen.
The Summer Islander, Ben, and his Westerosi-born son, Benjen, were farmers from the Neck. Years ago, Lord Rickard Stark had welcomed the immigrant and his wife, granting them farm lands to flourish in. They grew rice in the marsh and exported it from White Harbor. They were so grateful to House Stark that they quite frankly named their son “Benjen” for Lord Stark’s youngest child of similar age. Since then, their hard earned work with their rough black hands in the cold had paid off in prosperity. After being widowed, Ben and his son ran the farm, just the two of them … until a few Ironborn men took Moat Cailin and all their harvest this past year. Their will and pride refused to let them take it again. So instead of growing new rice, they let it wither away and left the land … trapping the jaws of the Ironborn to hunger. Now Ben and Benjen were reborn into Ser Brynden’s band, for the honor of House Stark. “With great honor comes a great ass whooping!” Ben had declared.
Jess and Jory were two brothers that served House Westerling as guards at the Crag, personally protecting the Westerling sisters, Jeyne and Eleyna. They had watched them grow up since birth. Participating in their rescue was their duty, a duty they took without hesitation for the girls who were like nieces to them.
Phyl was a crewmate of royal blood on the Motherfunker. Back on another Summer Isle kingdom, his older king brother passed away as his young prince nephew took fresh rule. After Phyl forbade his nephew-king to order an attack on a rival neighboring island, he screamed at him, “You are not my father!” and flew out of the throne room, slamming its double doors. Soon after, the boy-king ordered for his uncle’s exile. Free like a bird, Phyl flew away himself to a ship with his friend, the Black Sparrow, looking for a new adventure.
Sam, June, and Rico were all hard loyal Tully soldiers that were ready to follow the Blackfish to the end of the world. Sam used to be a tall fat leviathan of a man, until one day June told Sam, “You never had the making of a first-class athlete like Rico here.” From then on, Sam, offended, lost several stones over the years as the three served patriotically together to House Tully. Now tall, lean and muscular, Sam was a force not to be reckoned with. They nicknamed him Sam the Shredder, but for shredding his fat as his body was now packed with muscular meat.
The hedge knight Ser Barnabus the Goose volunteered along with his new squire Leo, a boy of fourteen, whom he met that same day. Goose was a tall man, big shoulders, wide hips with greying blond hair. Though he grew up as an orphan, Ser Barnabus often boasted about being the grandson of some legendary tall hedge knight that he never chanced to meet. The other orphans used to laugh at him, calling him the Useless Goose. But ever since he suited up in his knightly armor decades ago, Ser Barnabus assured he was a useful Goose helping the small folks around the Riverlands. Olyvar wondered if Barnabus was his real name, or if he was even a knight.
Leo’s older brothers wanted to join the action as well … so Mikkal, Raff, and Donal stepped forward. Their uncle Scrooge, a man in his fifties, will chip in his services too. The four brothers and uncle were known as the Pissa family. They once owned a tavern serving their mother’s recipe of baked thin crispy bread, spun circular into a flat pie, served with tomato sauce and cheese above. Their uncle Scrooge improved his sister’s recipe by adding sliced duck sausages on top of the cheese, and charging customers extra for the option. Olyvar and the men on the Motherfunker had sampled and enjoyed the cuisine they baked aboard. Captain Samullu claimed that pissa was indeed a tasty dish, and suggested adding slices of pineapples on top of it too. The Pissa brothers gave Samullu Jaqenssen a cold stare as if the gesture was treason to the recipe. Back when they owned the tavern with their mother, the family often boasted about their food to the point where their competitors despised them. Their opponents would try to mimic cooking the same dish, but others would complain it tasted no different than bread. Afraid of losing their revenue, they insulted their mother’s crispy dish by calling it “pissa,” slandering it by saying it tasted like piss. But the brothers took the name their enemies gave them and wore it like armor, never allowing it to hurt them. Raff returned their insult by calling their adversary’s food being something that comes out of a cow’s bung hole. That humiliation stuck. For a while, men and women from all over the Riverlands continued to rallied in long lines to the Pissa tavern for a delicious slice of pissa. Sadly one day, the Mountain and his men came to destroy their tavern during the war, and took their mother. They never saw her again. Despite the sad drama, the Pissa family were a cheerful bunch, save for their pessimistic uncle. Olyvar could only hope they would find their mother safe and sound some day.
On the first day aboard the Motherfunker, Leo had never been on a ship his entire life. He bolted to the stern of the galley, stood on the middle rail with his arms spread out and screamed, “I’m the king of the world!”
Olyvar had to grab the blond teen down before he fell overboard. “Nice try Leo,” Olyvar said. “But you are too lowborn to be royalty. You are better off marrying a queen to be a king, or at least start with a princess.”
Ser Barnabus the Goose appeared and offered his help. He was in need of a squire for some reason, and Leo was quite eager. “Leo, I’m going to teach you how to live.” Goose swung his arm around the teenager’s neck and rested it there. “You want to be a king and win the ladies? Learn how to squire for a knight first. Unchain and fetch me my stallion from the docks, I’ll show you a trick. I’ll show you how to ride it on this rocking ship!” Leo did as he was ordered.
“And when will I ever need that skill?” Leo questioned as he brought the horse up to the deck from the ramp.
“What was it you were looking for again on this journey? Your destiny? Your death?” Goose mounted.
“Naked princesses,” Leo said.
“Well this move would make any maiden, royal or lowborn, shed their clothes off for you.” The knight pulled down the reins as the stallion stood tall on its two hind legs, looking like a work of art meant for eternal statues of the gods.
Samullu appeared and asked Leo, “Is that Goose on a horse? On my boat? Why is Goose on a horse on my boat?!” The stallion came down, hooves thundering the top of the deck.
“Aye Captain, Ser Goose was teaching me how to pick up women.”
“Shiitt Leo, that’s all you had to say.” Samullu wrapped his right arm around the neck of the youth and offered his counsel, his left hand danced in the air as he spoke to solidify his argument. “If yo want naked women, f*ck land. Don’t be a knight. Be a captain of a galley. The best pick up line to catch any woman yo can, is ‘I own a ship’.” Samullu raised his bearded chin. “After this mission is over, come with me and we’ll sail the seas. Meet women from all over the world. And they love a captain. Do yo concur? Leo, each lady is just a flower, another rose by another name that smell just as sweet, waiting to be plucked.”
Goose winced at the word and protested. “The only maids you meet sailing seas are mermaids. Don’t be fooled by the Black Sparrow. Some of them may be pretty on the top half, but you won’t like what they got below. It probably stinks down there too. But the captain doesn’t mind, he seems to enjoy bedding mermaids!”
Whether sea, air or land … the Black Sparrow or Goose … Leo will probably have to fly with one of them after the mission, Olyvar thought.
The night before the rescue, the raiders and the crewmen drunkenly sang and cheered to music, rum, ale and pissa. Drowning in the glory of their task on the morrow, they reminisce about the harsh archery and lethal weapons training Lord Glover had given them over the past weeks back on land … while questioning how large Lady Mormont’s sacs truly were. Lady Roslin Tully, approached everyone and asked if they would write their names on the book she held. “It’s for the memories,” she said. They all did. A signature on each page for each man and Maege. Some drew their own personal coat of arms. When it was Olyvar’s turn, he hesitated about sketching the two towers. He wanted to separate himself from the murderous lore of House Frey. He decided to draw his towers, with a Stark wolf running on top of the bridge, and a Tully trout jumping below it. He signed his name, Ser Olyvar of House Frey, squire to the late King Robb Stark, knighted by Ser Brynden Tully.
He wondered if he will be written into history as a great knight some day. A knight that could not save his king, Olyvar thought sadly. He would not be the only one though. Word had travelled for Ser Loras Tyrell, the Knight of Flowers, and his gallant assault at Dragonstone. He was gravely wounded, but no word on this brave knight’s final fate. Like Olyvar, Ser Loras had failed to protect his first King, Renly Baratheon, a man that the Knight of Flower was rumored to have truly loved. Though his King was gone, he continued to be bathe in the glory of battle. Despite being on the opposing side of the war, Ser Olyvar would be gay if he had the chance to meet Ser Loras, if he still lives, chatting with him about the kings they loved and lost.
Later on that night, Captain Samullu Jaqenssen shared a drunken game of cvyasse with Ser Barnabus for a golden dragon. When Goose doubled down after his first loss, he fell again, owing the Black Sparrow a pair of golden dragons by the end of it. When Samullu demanded Goose to pay up his reward immediately, Goose pretended not to understand his loose Summer Isle accent, giving him a wild chase.
“Wat?”
“Yo loose Goose, yo owe me the gold,” the Captain demanded in his queer Common Tongue.
“Wat?”
“The gold yo fool. The gold! Yo pay me.”
“Wat?”
“Wat country yo from?”
“Wat?”
“Do they not speak the Common Tongue in Wat?”
“Wat?”
“Common Tongue mother Goose!”
“Wat?”
“Say wat again! I dare yo, I double dare yo! I’ll throw yo overboard off the Motherfunker!”
Goose paused for a moment, until his pride could not resist. “Wat? Wat? Wat? Wat? Wat?” Goose said ‘what‘ so many times, it sounded like he was quacking, each one louder than before. “Wat? Wat? Wat? Wat? Wat?”
In a nick of fury, Samullu Jaqenssen flipped over the cyvasse table, stood up and drew his short blade. His remaining good eye raged like a storm, as steam seeped through the black leather patch of the other. “Yo cold ass honking Goose! Yo son o’ a wh*re! Yo bandit! I will gut yo from balls to brains to see what gooses is made of. I better find yo sacs golden before I take yo skull to gild gold! Either way, I will have my gold from yo!”
Goose suddenly comprehended everything, stood up with all his height and threatened. “Goodness gracious, do you kiss your mother with that mouth? Go ahead and try, but you will only find below me great balls of fire!” He grabbed his own crotch and pumped it once into the air. “And after your failed attempt, I will claw out your last remaining eye, leaving you blind for the rest of your sorry life!”
The others flocked towards the scene, holding the two back as they inched towards each other.
Jess tried to stop them. “Gods, have mercy!”
Sam the Shredder intervened as well. “That is enough! I want you two to stop!”
Jory said, “Cut it out!”
“Will yo shut up!” screamed Phyl, who had hustled a wager on the game.
Mikkal grabbed the drunken Goose, threw him to the floor, and told him to just beat it.
At the end, they all just laugh it off like all drunk men do. Smiling, spilling ale out of their cups, retching out into the sea the rum they drank, before drinking some more again. They were having one last good time before the mission. But today they had a job to do.
The twenty men, Lady Maege, and Ser Rolph continued up the paths in the lightless caves of Casterly Rock, huffing and puffing, but still silent as much as they could hold. One loud word at the wrong place at the wrong time may be their doom. In single file, the group followed Ser Spicer’s point with one lit torch. The stench was terrible and the dampness made it worse. Guarding the rear, Olyvar’s eyes were clouded in darkness at times where the torchlight was too far ahead to shine back. He relied on Ser Goose in front of him to lead the way, as Goose relied on Leo for the same.
[Part 3]

TITLE CORRECTION: TWOW Prologue Theory and Fan-Fic, 1 of 4

Hi, I am new here and I am posting for the first time. Please let me know if I am breaking any rules here so I can re-do it. It is one full chapter, but because it is so long, I broke into four parts.
This is a theory for the actual Prologue of The Winds of Winter. Please enjoy. This is Part 1 of 4.
The Winds of Winter
Prologue
A storm was coming, but that was not part of the plan.
To the east, dark grey clouds and flashes of lightning were seen afar while thunder could be heard mumbling its rage in the distance. Here where they stood, fierce sea-chilled winds blew from the clear skies of the west. Two weather fronts were on course for a collision, and caught in between was a giant rock that mountains above the shoreline, a hard place. The old natural stonewalls of Casterly Rock were half bathed in gold from the even-falling sun, while the other hid in the shadow of the approaching storm. And soon enough, everything will be clouded in black.
The sound of the strong waves smacking into the face of the stony cliffs can be felt from a mile away, as it was no different from the ones crashing into the wooden hull of their galley. Above their rocking swanship, three tall wooden masts sported simple dark black sails, filled with winds from the west, speeding their eastern course towards the home of House Lannister, ready to hug the coastline tight, fast and dangerous.
The Summer Isle captain at the helm shouted his accented announcement, “Awww shittt! Everyone get yo shields and weapons ready. It’s about to go down! Adventurers and avengers, assemble up to the deck of Motherfunker. Be sharp and stay on yo toes! We’re running this so let’s go!”
“With me to the boats!” the legendary stern knight Ser Brynden Tully called out as his fighting men rallied at the starboard rear of their ship, emerging from the cabins below.
“We all chose to be here. If any man wants to back down now, then do so quickly. I would not die in that man’s company. We elected to do this task for honor and for justice. Some of us are here for vengeance and we may even chance to kill some of them. If so, you may enjoy your short moment of pleasure. But what I offer here is the IMMORTALITY of the songs and tales. And when it is all said & done as we return safely home, the singers will sing of this glorious day, our honorable deed, and their shame of a jape. And they will sing it from this day to the ending of the world, and we in it shall be remembered! We few, we brave few, we band of brothers. For he who shed blood with me today shall be my brother forever in song!”
A roar of cheer exploded in the air, loud and thunderous. As the ruckus died down, Lady Mormont proclaimed, “And a sister too!”
“Aye Maege,” said the Blackfish. “But we have always considered you as one of our brothers. Between your legs, your sacs are larger than most men, especially all the Lannister soldiers.”
“Well that is easy to say, all those Lannisters are a bunch of golden eunuchs!” Lady Mormont declared unlady like.
Laughter swept the deck.
The Summer Isle captain above shouted again and prayed, “Today is The Day, and the moment is upon us my friends. Thirty seconds until the drop zone lads! May the gods be with yo!”
On the starboard stern, three small rowboats hung out from the hull, hovering above the rough waves. Attached over the swanship’s parapet was a roped ladder, allowing the fighters to lower themselves down onto their watercrafts. Each one was designed to hold four pairs of oarsmen abreast, and a single coxswain to steer at the rear.
They were twenty good men and Maege. Each one scaled in black boiled leather armor, with a quiver of arrows slung on one back shoulder, and a Summer Isle goldenheart bow on the other. Most fighters had their own selection of close quarter combat weapons that sat on their belts while a round black-painted wooden shield rested at the center of their backs. They wore no sigils and smeared mud spots on their faces to mimic dark ghostly shadows for this stealthy task. They were lightly armored and had fewer weapons, as their goal required speed. If all goes to plan, they would not need any of them. They could accomplish this mission without a soul lost on either side. But this approaching storm was not part of the plan.
The Blackfish made one last heroic call on the deck of the Motherfunker, before he lowered himself on the ladder, “Come with me and take this song!”
Rico added to the cry, “Come on brothers! Do you want to live forever!?!”
They roared proudly again and began their descent as the Summer Isle crewmen assisted the Westerosi to the ropes, sharing firm ebony and ivory handshakes as they told them they will be back.
Ser Brynden Tully reached the rear rowboat LionsJape along with June, Jory, Jess, Fess, Ben and Benjen. Though it was the end boat, it will be the first to fly.
Aboard the middle boat WinterStorm was Lady Maege Mormont, and the other six oarsmen Phyl, Rico, Sam the Shredder, Ser Barnabus the Goose, Scrooge, and Queen Jeyne’s brother Ser Raynald Westerling.
Lord Galbart Glover commandeered the third boat BattleWolf, which hung closer to the center of the swanship. On it were the younger men Donal, Mikkal, Raff, Leo, and Alesander, all merely teenagers.
As he watched from above, Ser Olyvar Frey thought they were little dark turtles crawling down the ladders with their black shields slung on their backs. As the last turtle, Olyvar hugged & kissed his sister Roslin, and then their brother Perwyn. Ser Perwyn Frey was Lady Tully’s sworn shield, charged with her life’s protection, and her unborn child’s too. Though they were all Frey as family, Rosby blood thorns in their veins as well. We were all just sweet Roses By another name, a horrible name.
Olyvar descended. Alesander Frey was waiting for him adjacent to an empty seat on the boat. He was Olyvar’s nephew, but because they were of a similar age, Alesander felt more like a cousin to him, a cousin that felt more like a brother. He wondered what their mothers would have thought if they saw them there now. As Olyvar sat, he stretched his arms wide at the starboard-bow of BattleWolf and the brothers both grabbed an oar each. Alesander sang and japed, “Are you ready to fly this boat to the moon somehow?”
“Nothing is impossible!” Olyvar smiled.
Ser Olyvar Frey never thought he would be on this boat, absorbing the wrath of the big blue watery roads, rocking BattleWolf as it clung to Motherfunker. But his new knightly confidence was so high he could roar at the Drowned God to look at him and tell him to piss off. But he knew better and kept his silence. With his Frey luck, he believed his corpse would be bedding with mermaids down under the sea if he ever cursed the Drowned God aloud.
The owner of the swanship Motherfunker was an exiled prince of the Summer Isles, a big man with a short black beard, shiny bald head and a dark patch over his left eye that he can’t see through. He was Captain Samullu Jaqenssen, but notoriously called the Black Sparrow … though Olyvar had never heard of him until recently. He and his crew were the only sailors that would assist them in their cause, hypnotized to be a part of their upcoming famous Westerosi song. He was to help navigate his galley at high speeds hugging the rocky coast of the Westerlands. With the three rowboats hung to the side of Motherfunker, it would be hard for the sentries on top of the Rock to spot from above. The Motherfunker stayed far away from the coastline to only emerge near their objective at the time of attack. With a single swanship with plain black sails, the Black Sparrow hoped that the Lannister watchmen would pay them no mind as a regular trading galley on its way to Lannisport or wherever, instead of a vessel for an amphibious assault on their castle. And the stronger the winds and the faster the ship, the window of time to be exposed was much shorter. “They had the need for speed, and the speed needed the wind,” Goose had said the night before. The gods have blessed them with strong winds now. They were to come with the sun setting at their backs in the west, blinding any coastal lookout. Because they were cursed with this approaching storm, the plan changed and they had to depart earlier. Olyvar prayed that this would not compromise the mission. Only time will tell.
Racing onto the storm and nearing the rising cliffs, the Captain spun his ship quickly to a southern course and gave the crewmen the signal to dismount. “Ahhhhhhhhh-ah Ahhhhhhhh-ah!”
“Get ready to push!” the Blackfish commanded.
Each oarsman pressed the tip of their long wooden stick onto the hull of the galley, ready to push off. The Summer Isle crewmen began severing the connections of the mothership and its three rowboats. Single-handed axes swung as LionsJape pushed itself off, the first of three. The rowboat plummeted and the waters swallowed it before spitting it back out just as quick. After allowing itself to lose in Motherfunker’s wake, the oarsmen redirected the bow towards the rocks at the Blackfish’s orders.
The WinterStorm followed right after with Lady Maege’s commands, “Push lads! Push! Push!” as it dropped.
Now it was BattleWolf’s turn. “Gods damn it, I’m too old for this shit,” Lord Glover said as he raised a gloved hand and swung it down, giving the signal to cut. At the main deck, the crewmen swung their axes, gleaming gold in the western sunlight as the oarsmen pushed off. For a heartbeat, the fall had taken Olyvar’s breath away as Lord Glover’s BattleWolf floated in the air. Are we flying? Are we on a dragon? His rowboat slammed into the water, splashing chilled wet droplets inside the boat and out. His hair of short black curls flew and fell, dampening at the plunge. The collision almost knocked Olyvar and the men overboard, but they hung on. The Motherfunker left them with a white salty wake as it headed south. Lord Glover then commanded the starboard men to pull their oars, aiming towards WinterStorm. Olyvar pulled. Once aligned, both sides of BattleWolf began to rev hard. The men were howling and roaring with each tension, trying to evade this dangerous zone of being spotted.
Since the Red Wedding and the death of his beloved King, Robb Stark, Olyvar could not sleep. Grief, anger, vengeance, insomnia and drowsiness took him over the days and nights that felt like half-dreams. But the crashing kiss of the water dive had re-woken Olyvar in shock, as he realized what they were about to do was no fantasy he had ever known. Nothing can stop us now, this is really happening. His heart was pounding to the rhythm of the oars and he wanted to scream his battle cry. He could still hear Jaqenssen the Black Sparrow sounding his siren “Ahhhhhhhh-ah Ahhhhhhh-ah!”
We are brothers loyal to the King in the North, the land of ice and snow. We serve Riverrun and Winterfell, where the hot springs flow. And now the divine winds of the gods had driven our mothership to the Westerlands. To fight for honor, the North will sing and the West will cry. Casterly Rock … Winter is Coming! On we sweep with threshing oars, our only goal will be the western shore!
As Olyvar’s oar rose and fell, he looked up to the windows of Casterly Rock’s tall stony towers, searching for the signaling candle light. But it could not be seen this early. Only when the sun was fully set as planned, this candle would replace it as the guiding light. They rowed by rocks and rocks and more rocks. Seagulls flew in spheres above them, chasing one another. The sun still hung in the air, slowly falling to splash onto the western horizon of the Sunset Sea. They then rowed by a courtyard that just floated on the earth forty feet above the sea’s surface. Suddenly on the other side of their boat, they eyed a whale skimming off the glimmering golden ocean. The boys of the vulnerable BattleWolf did not say a word as the monstrous water-beast swam the opposite direction just twenty yards away from them, paying them no mind. It was a good thing I did not curse the Drowned God as I was going to earlier.
Olyvar, Alesander, Leo, Mikkal, Raff and Donal were seated on Galbart Glover’s rowboat, rowing to Galbart Glover’s commands, “Row! Row! Row your boats you son o’ wh*res!” and taking in Galbart Glover’s cold stare as he eyed the two Freys specifically when he said it. Olyvar’s arms began to tire, but this was not the place to show weakness to his brothers. So he pulled on while keeping their rowboat as close to the stony walls as possible to avoid detection from above.
They trailed the Lady Bear while following the Blackfish. Soon after, Ser Brynden Tully had found his mark and grounded LionsJape onto a small beach. His men exited, flipped the rowboat above them and dashed forty yards straight toward the rocky edge, where a small barred cave was fitted at the base. Underneath the rusted iron, a thin valley of brown watery slush stank & trickled into the sand & sea. Everyone knew what that was when they agreed to participate in the assault. The Blackfish was told back at Riverrun about a sewer path inside Casterly Rock that allowed all the shit and piss to drain out to the ocean. This tiny hole by the foot of the mountain was all and everything for the mission.
When the sprinting men reached the end with their boat, they dropped it at the skirt and pressed themselves against the wall. The façade was conveniently arched outwards as it ascended, making it difficult to be sighted from above. With the waves muffling the noise of speech, any of them can speak freely outside at sea level. From the cliffs above, their human conversations below would only sound like ghostly whispers. No casual listener should be alerted to such. But hearing and seeing are different things, and they must not be seen.
WinterStorm and BattleWolf soon followed. As Olyvar departed BattleWolf, he cringed at the soreness of his arms that the work had left him. His arms will have to ache again as his squad lifted the rowboat above their heads. They stormed towards the barred entrance, with bow and quiver slung on each shoulder, a turtle shell shield at the center of his back. While the others carried shorter lighter personal weapons, Olyvar was equipped with a longsword that once belonged to his King, Robb Stark.
They dropped off BattleWolf when they reached the wall, waiting for a way in. Ten brothers on one side of the cave, and eleven on the other. The closest ones to the door had their small axes and weapons drawn along with their shields, while the further ones notched an arrow onto their bow. Olyvar had his Summer Isle goldenheart bow ready. The entrance was small, the same size as their black shields, guarding the realm of Casterly Rock, and they continued to wait.
This thunderstorm was coming, and it was not part of the plan. It was the Blackfish’s decision to leave Motherfunker earlier before the storm surges would flood the sewers of Casterly Rock. Their forty yard dash from the beach to the gate may be twenty yards if they arrived an hour later … and there may be no more exit by the time they escape back. But Stark loyalists hidden in the woods outside of the castle were told of executing this assault at the exact evenfall of Queen Jeyne Stark’s arrival to Casterly Rock. The Lannister soldier escorts would be exhausted from their march and acquired a false sense of security when they reached the safe comforts of the castle. The Stark land forces led by Lord Gawen Westerling would create a mummer’s farce with trumpets and drums, sending the weary Lannisters to one side, as the Blackfish himself attacked the other from the sea. Evenfall of this day was the golden time to do this, but they arrived an hour too early. With the storm, Olyvar prayed that everyone else would adjust to the plan. He wondered if Lord Westerling would account for the storm surges. But it makes no difference now. They were here, and they cannot turn back.
Suddenly the rusted iron of the barred cave unlocked and swung open, creaking like a loud squealing rat. Emerged was a crouching older man with a short gray beard and a jaw squared like a mason spice jar. “Welcome to the Rock!” Ser Rolph Spicer declared.
Ser Brynden greeted him with a hug, “I’m so glad you came early, we would be sleeping with the fishes if you were late.”
“It was Edmure’s idea to leave early, he said the storm would flood the sewers, and we prayed you would come sooner too.”
“Like that damn Mill again, Edmure acting prematurely? That boy will never learn! Thank the Gods!”
They both chuckled and began entering through the gate. The others soon followed, ducking into the small hole and into the darkness.
Once inside the caves of Casterly Rock, Ser Rolph grabbed his torchlight and lifted it to the air, showing the brothers the vastness. The lobby was an open abyss where the ceiling was fifty feet high. The walls had multiple rocky openings naturally carved in, small and large. Some were wide enough to walk through. Inside were all shadows, saved the areas illuminated by golden sunlight spying in through each seldom hole or fissure. Where the flames can brighten, hard brown rocks glowed and flickered, as well as old metal tracks, mining carts, abandoned tools, ladders, rusty chains and the occasional plant roots that brewed in the darkness of the caves. The smell reeked. Olyvar was sure there would be no real gold here as it was probably mined out over the centuries. Only shit shits down here in the sewers and caves of Lord Tywin Lannister’s home, not gold, Olyvar thought. This was where Lann the Clever started his legend, swindling the Casterly residents out of the castle, cheating them. It was their turn now to write history, these archers from the sea facing off with their own modern Casterly ploy … accomplishing it without being seen, doing it as faceless warriors.
They followed Ser Rolph and his torchlight in single file, going deeper up into the caves, fitting in burrowed hallways that barely fit them, pursuing his decisions at each fork in the paths, squishing their feet on sluggish wet slopes and steps. The very first entrance they encountered required them to descend a few yards before climbing up the rest of the way. It was hundreds of feet in elevation that they must ascend to. At times, the way was lit well enough. But at other instants, the darkness blinds them, only facing the brother in front of them for their flight. I have promises to keep. And steps to go before I sleep. And steps to go before I sleep.
“By now the guards at the top of the Rock should be asleep after I spiced up their ale,” Ser Rolph Spicer said with a cheeky smile. “Before my sister Sybell married into House Westerling, I explored these parts of Casterly Rock in my youth as a smuggler, going up and down many times. Your legs will tire, no doubt about that. But you lads are years younger than I, and I better hear no complaints unless I am the first one to make it.”
“I’ll do my best,” young Leo announced for himself.
“Your best?” Ser Spicer questioned. “Losers whine about their best. Winners rescue crowned queens.”
“Lady Jeyne Westerling-Stark is THE crowned Queen,” Leo replied.
“Is that so?” Ser Rolph gave Leo a sarcastic look with a raised eyebrow, before continuing up the steps inside the Rock.
“I’ll decide the turns and I’ll establish the security checkpoints. There, we can rest for a moment. A few of you will be left there to guard the area as the others will continue to ascend. Those few will wait until we fall back. But remember, the journey down is far less exhausting. For now, let’s go up and up. Ser Olyvar Frey, would you take the honor of watching our rear?”
Ser Olyvar Frey. The name was still queer to him. As much as he liked the ‘Ser’ in his name, he would like to rid the “Frey” in the surname. He had been the most loyal squire a king could have asked for. He would have stayed with King Robb Stark to the end of the world, but his own blood tore that away from him. Olyvar was not blind though. His young king had made grave mistakes, more than Olyvar wanted to count. As much as he would have favored his sister Roslin to marry him, Olyvar knew you cannot choose the people you love. And Robb genuinely loved another, he hoped. Jeyne Westerling was just as sweet as Roslin. Olyvar would have stayed at Robb’s side as his brother-in-law, or some uncle-in-law by Lord Edmure Tully. Though by choosing Jeyne, it slighted Olyvar’s father Lord Walder Frey. But Seven Hells father, did you have to murder him? At my sister’s wedding feast? Under your own roof? Under my roof? Robb Stark was my king. He was brave and good, and Olyvar Frey loved him. And his soul was tortured in sleepless days and nights, knowing he shared the same blood as the murderers … knowing he could have stopped it if it was not for impulse. You are an honorable fool Olyvar. His father had told him of the treacherous plan the day before, but Olyvar cursed it aloud, defending Robb as it was still his duty. You should’ve been smart and played stupid with father. You could have informed Robb while you were still free, breaking this bad dream. Olyvar shouldn’t have tried to bargain with his father. He should have known he made up his mind a long while ago. Olyvar was imprisoned in the dungeons of the Twins during the Red Wedding. The gaolers were japing at him, “Go ahead, do your duty. Save your king!”
My king. The sad memories faded into blurred flashbacks.
[Part 2]

Armaments: Daggers: - [x] Dagger - [x] Parrying dagger - [x] Miséricorde - [x] Great knife - [x] Bloodstained dagger - [x] Erdsteel dagger - [x] Wakizashi - [x] Celebrants sickle - [x] Ivory sickle - [x] Crystal knife - [x] Scorpions stinger - [x] Cinquedea - [x] Glintstone kris - [x] Reduvia - [x] Blade of calling - [x] Black knife Straight swords: - [x] Shortsword - [x] Longsword - [x] Broadsword - [x] Weathered straight sword - [x] Lordsworns straight sword - [x] Nobles slender sword - [x] Cane sword - [x] Warhawks talon - [x] Lazuli Glintstone sword - [x] Carian knights sword - [x] Crystal sword - [x] Rotten Crystal sword - [x] Miquellan knights sword - [x] Ornamental straight sword - [x] Golden epitaph - [x] Sword of st trina - [x] Regalia of eochaid - [x] Coded sword - [x] Sword of night and flame Greatswords: - [x] Bastard sword - [x] Claymore - [x] Iron greatsword - [x] Lordsworns greatsword - [x] Knights greatsword - [x] Banished knights greatsword - [x] Forked greatsword - [x] Flamberge - [x] Gargoyles greatsword - [x] Gargoyles black blade - [x] Inseparable sword - [x] Sword of Milos - [x] Marias executioner sword - [x] Ordovis’ greatsword - [x] Alabaster lords sword - [x] Deaths poker - [x] Helphen’s steeple - [x] Blasphemous blade - [x] Golden order greatsword - [x] Dark moon greatsword - [x] Sacred relic sword Colossal swords: - [x] Zweihander - [x] Greatsword - [x] Watchdogs greatsword - [x] Trolls golden sword - [x] Troll knights sword - [x] Royal greatsword - [x] Grafted blade greatsword - [x] Ruins greatsword - [x] Starscourge greatsword - [x] Godslayers greatsword - [x] Malikeths black blade Thrusting swords: - [x] Rapier - [x] Estoc - [x] Nobles estoc - [x] Cleanrot knights sword - [x] Rogiers rapier - [x] Antspur rapier - [x] Frozen needle Heavy thrusting swords: - [x] Great epee - [x] Godskin stitcher - [x] Bloody helice - [x] Dragon kings cragblade Curved swords: - [x] Scimitar - [x] Falchion - [x] Shamshir - [x] Grossmesser - [x] Bandits curved sword - [x] Shotel - [x] Scavengers curved sword - [x] Mantis blade - [x] Beastmans curved sword - [x] Flowing curved sword - [x] Serpent gods curved sword - [x] Magma blade - [x] Nox flowing sword - [x] Wing of astel - [x] Eclipse shotel Curved greatswords: - [x] Dismounter - [x] Omen cleaver - [x] Monks flame blade - [x] Beastmans cleaver - [x] Bloodhounds fang - [x] Onyx lords greatsword - [x] Zamor curved sword - [x] Magma wyrms scalesword - [x] Morgotts cursed sword Katanas: - [x] Uchigatana - [x] Nagakiba - [x] Serpentbone blade - [x] Meteoric ore blade - [x] Moonveil - [x] Rivers of blood - [x] Dragon scale blade - [x] Hand of malenia Twinblades: - [x] Twinblade - [x] Twinned knights sword - [x] Godskin peeler - [x] Gargoyles twinblade - [x] Gargoyles black blades - [x] Eleonora’s poleblade Axes: - [x] Hand axe - [x] Forked hatchet - [x] Battle axe - [x] Warped axe - [x] Jawbone axe - [x] Iron cleaver - [x] Highland axe - [x] Celebrants cleaver - [x] Sacrificial axe - [x] Icerind hatchet - [x] Ripple blade - [x] Stormhawk axe - [x] Rosus’ axe Greataxes: - [x] Greataxe - [x] Crescent moon axe - [x] Longhaft axe - [x] Executioners greataxe - [x] Great omenkiller cleaver - [x] Rusted anchor - [x] Butchering knife - [x] Gargoyles greataxe - [x] Gargoyles black axe - [x] Winged greathorn - [x] Axe of godrick Hammers: - [x] Club - [x] Curved club - [x] Spiked club - [x] Stone club - [x] Mace - [x] Morning star - [x] Warpick - [x] Hammer - [x] Monks flame mace - [x] Varrés bouquet - [x] Envoys horn - [x] Nox flowing hammer - [x] Ringed finger - [x] Scepter of the all knowing - [x] Marikas hammer Flails: - [x] Flail - [x] Nightrider flail - [x] Chain link flail - [x] Family heads - [x] Bastards stars Great hammers: - [x] Large club - [x] Curved greatclub - [x] Great mace - [x] Pickaxe - [x] Brick hammer - [x] Battle hammer - [x] Rotten battle hammer - [x] Celebrants skull - [x] Great stars - [x] Greathorn hammer - [x] Envoys longhorn - [x] Cranial vessel candlestand - [x] Beastclaw greathammer - [x] Devourers scepter Colossal weapons: - [x] Duelist greataxe - [x] Rotten greataxe - [x] Golems halberd - [x] Giant crusher - [x] Prelates inferno cozier - [x] Greatclub - [x] Trolls hammer - [x] Dragon greatclaw - [x] Watchdogs staff - [x] Staff of the avatar - [x] Rotten staff - [x] Envoys greathorn - [x] Ghizas wheel - [x] Falling star beast jaw - [x] Axe of Godfrey Spears: - [x] Short spear - [x] Iron spear - [x] Spear - [x] Partisan - [x] Pike - [x] Spiked spear - [x] Cross-naginata - [x] Claymans harpoon - [x] Celebrants rib-rake - [x] Torchpole - [x] Inquisitors girandole - [x] Crystal spear - [x] Rotten Crystal spear - [x] Cleanrot spear - [x] Death ritual spear - [x] Bolt of gransax Greatspears: - [x] Lance - [x] Treespear - [x] Serpent hunter - [x] Silurias tree - [x] Vykes war spear - [x] Mohgwyn’s sacred spear Halberds: - [x] Halberd - [x] Banished knights halberd - [x] Lucerne - [x] Glaive - [x] Vulgar militia shotel - [x] Vulgar militia saw - [x] Guardians swordspear - [x] Gargoyles halberd - [x] Gargoyles black halberd - [x] Nightrider glaive - [x] Pests glaive - [x] Ripple crescent blade - [x] Golden halberd - [x] Dragon halberd - [x] Lorettas war sickle - [x] Commanders standard Reapers: - [x] Scythe - [x] Grave scythe - [x] Halo scythe - [x] Winged scythe Whips: - [x] Whip - [x] Thorned whip - [x] Urumi - [x] Hoslow’s petal whip - [x] Magma whip candlestick - [x] Giants red braid Fists: - [x] Caestus - [x] Spiked caestus - [x] Katar - [x] Iron ball - [x] Star fist - [x] Clinging bone - [x] Veterans prosthesis - [x] Cipher pata - [x] Grafted dragon Claws: - [x] Hookclaws - [x] Bloodhounds claws - [x] Venomous fangs - [x] Raptors talons Light bows: - [x] Shortbow - [x] Composite bow - [x] Red branch shortbow - [x] Misbegotten shortbow - [x] Harp bow Bows: - [x] Longbow - [x] Albunaric bow (snowfield) - [x] Black bow - [x] Pulley bow - [x] Horn bow - [x] Serpent bow - [x] Erdtree bow Greatbows: - [x] Greatbow - [x] Golem greatbow - [x] Erdtree greatbow - [x] Lion greatbow Crossbows: - [x] Soldiers crossbow - [x] Light crossbow - [x] Heavy crossbow - [x] Arabalest - [x] Crepus’ black-key crossbow - [x] Pulley crossbow - [x] Full moon crossbow Ballistas: - [x] Hand ballista - [x] Jar cannon Glintstone staffs: - [x] Astrologers staff - [x] Glintstone staff - [x] Academy Glintstone staff - [x] Diggers staff - [x] Demi-human queens staff - [x] Azur Glintstone staff - [x] Lusats Glintstone staff - [x] Carian Glintstone staff - [x] Carian glintblade staff - [x] Carian regal scepter - [x] Albunaric staff - [x] Staff of loss - [x] Gelmir Glintstone staff - [x] Crystal staff - [x] Rotten Crystal staff - [x] Meteorite staff - [x] Staff of the guilty - [x] Prince of deaths staff Sacred seals: - [x] Finger seal - [x] Erdtree seal - [x] Golden order seal - [x] Gravel stone seal - [x] Giants seal - [x] Godslayer seal - [x] Clawmark seal - [x] Frenzied flame seal - [x] Dragon communion seal Torches: - [x] Torch - [x] Beast repellent torch - [x] Steel wire torch - [x] Sentry’s torch - [x] Ghostflame torch - [x] St trinas torch Small shields: - [x] Rickety shield - [x] Riveted wooden shield - [x] Blue-white wooden shield - [x] Scripture wooden shield - [x] Red thorn roundshield - [x] Pillory shield - [x] Buckler - [x] Iron roundshield - [x] Gilded iron shield - [x] Man-serpents shield - [x] Ice crest shield - [x] Rift shield - [x] Perfumers shield - [x] Shield of the guilty - [x] Spiralhorn shield - [x] Smoldering shield - [x] Coil shield Medium shields: - [x] Hawk crest wooden shield - [x] Horse crest wooden shield - [x] Candletree wooden shield - [x] Flame crest wooden shield - [x] Marred wooden shield - [x] Sun realm shield - [x] Round shield - [x] Large leather shield - [x] Black leather shield - [x] Marred leather shield - [x] Heater shield - [x] Blue crest heater shield - [x] Red crest heater shield - [x] Beast crest heater shield - [x] Inverted hawk heater shield - [x] Eclipse crest heater shield - [x] Kite shield - [x] Blue-gold kite shield - [x] Scorpion kite shield - [x] Twinbird kite shield - [x] Brass shield - [x] Banished knights shield - [x] Albunaric shield - [x] Beast-mans jar shield - [x] Carian knights shield - [x] Silver Mirrorshield - [x] Great turtle shell Greatshields: - [x] Wooden greatshield - [x] Lordsworns shield - [x] Briar greatshield - [x] Spiked palisade shield - [x] Icon shield - [x] Golden beastcrest shield - [x] Manor towershield - [x] Crossed-tree towershield - [x] Inverted hawk towershield - [x] Dragon towershield - [x] Distinguished greatshield - [x] Gilded greatshield - [x] Cuckoo greatshield - [x] Redmane greatshield - [x] Golden greatshield - [x] Haligtree crest greatshield - [x] Crucible hornshield - [x] Dragonclaw shield - [x] Fingerprint stone shield - [x] Eclipse crest greatshield - [x] Ants skull plate - [x] Erdtree greatshield - [x] Jellyfish shield - [x] Visage shield - [x] One-eyed shield
Armour: Heads: - [x] Alberich’s pointed hat - [x] Albunaric mask - [x] All-knowing helm - [x] Aristocrat hat - [x] Aristocrat headband - [x] Ash of war scarab - [x] Astrologers hood - [x] Azur’s glintstone crown - [x] Bandit mask - [x] Banished knight helm - [x] Beast champion helm - [x] Black dumpling - [x] Black hood - [x] Black knife hood - [x] Black wolf mask - [x] Black flame monk hood - [x] Blackguards iron mask - [x] Bloodhound knight helm - [x] Bloodsoaked mask - [x] Blue cloth cowl - [x] Blue festive hood - [x] Blue silver mail hood - [x] Briar helm - [x] Bull-goat helm - [x] Carian knight helm - [x] Cerulean tear scarab - [x] Chain coif - [x] Champion headband - [x] Cleanrot helm - [x] Commoners headband - [x] Confessor hood - [x] Consorts mask - [x] Crimson hood - [x] Crimson tear scarab - [x] Crucible axe helm - [x] Crucible tree helm - [x] Cuckoo knight helm - [x] Depraved perfumers headscarf - [x] Diallos mask - [x] Drake knight helm - [x] Duelist helm - [x] Eccentrics hood - [x] Elden Lord crown - [x] Envoy crown - [x] Exile hood - [x] Festive hood - [x] Fia’s hood - [x] Finger maiden fillet - [x] Fingerprint helm - [x] Fire monk hood - [x] Fire prelate helm - [x] Foot soldier cap - [x] Foot soldier helm - [x] Foot soldier helmet - [x] Gelmir knight helm - [x] Gilded foot soldier cap - [x] Glintstone scarab - [x] Godrick knight helm - [x] Godrick soldier helm - [x] Godskin apostle hood - [x] Godskin noble hood - [x] Great horned headband - [x] Greathelm - [x] Greathood - [x] Guardian mask - [x] Guilty hood - [x] Haima glintstone crown - [x] Haligtree helm - [x] Haligtree knight helm - [x] Hierodas glintstone crown - [x] High page hood - [x] Highwayman hood - [x] Hoslows helm - [x] Iji’s mirrorhelm - [x] Imp head cat - [x] Imp head corpse - [x] Imp head Elder - [x] Imp head fanged - [x] Imp head long-tongued - [x] Imp head wolf - [x] Incantation scarab - [x] Iron helmet - [x] Iron kasa - [x] Jar - [x] Juvenile scholar cap - [x] Kaiden helm - [x] Karolos glintstone crown - [x] Knight helm - [x] Land of reeds helm - [x] Lazuli glintstone crown - [x] Leyndell knight helm - [x] Leyndell soldier helm - [x] Lionel’s helm - [x] Lusat’s glintstone crown - [x] Malenia’s winged helm - [x] Malformed dragon helm - [x] Malikeths helm - [x] Marais helm - [x] Marionette soldiers birdhelm - [x] Marionette soldiers helm - [x] Mask of confidence - [x] Mushroom crown - [x] Mushroom head - [x] Navy hood - [x] Night maiden twin crown - [x] Nights cavalry helm - [x] Nomadic merchants chapeau - [x] Nox mirrorhelm - [x] Nox monk hood - [x] Nox swordstress crown - [x] Octopus head - [x] Okina mask - [x] Old aristocrat cowl - [x] Olivinus glintstone crown - [x] Omen helm - [x] Omensmirk mask - [x] Page hood - [x] Perfumers hood - [x] Preceptors big hat - [x] Prisoner iron mask - [x] Prophet blindfold - [x] Pumpkin head - [x] Queens crescent crown - [x] Radahn solider helm - [x] Radahns redmane helm - [x] Radiant gold mask - [x] Raging wolf helm - [x] Raya Lucarian helm - [x] Redmane knight helm - [x] Rotten duelist helm - [x] Royal knights helm - [x] Royal remains helm - [x] Ruler’s mask - [x] Sacred crown helm - [x] Sage hood - [x] Sanguine noble hood - [x] Scaled helm - [x] Shining horn headband - [x] Silver tear mask - [x] Skeletal mask - [x] Snow witch hat - [x] Spellblades pointed hat - [x] Traveler’s hat - [x] Travelling maidens hood - [x] Tree sentinel helm - [x] Twinned helm - [x] Twinsage glintstone crown - [x] Vagabond knight helm - [x] Veterans helm - [x] Vulgar militia helm - [x] White mask - [x] Witch’s glintstone crown - [x] Zamor mask Chest: - [x] Alberich’s robe - [x] All-knowing armour - [x] Aristocrat coat - [x] Aristocrat garb - [x] Astrologers robe - [x] Azur’s glintstone robe - [x] Bandit garb - [x] Banished knight armour - [x] Battlemage robe - [x] Beast champion armour - [x] Black knife armour - [x] Blackflame monk armour - [x] Blaidd’s armour - [x] Bloodhound knight armour - [x] Bloodsoaked tabard - [x] Blue cloth vest - [x] Blue festive garb - [x] Blue silver mail armour - [x] Briar armour - [x] Bull-goats armour - [x] Carian knight armour - [x] Chain armour - [x] Chain-draped tabard - [x] Champions pauldron - [x] Cleanrot armour - [x] Cloth garb - [x] Commoners garb - [x] Commoners simple garb - [x] Confessor armour - [x] Consorts robe - [x] Corhyns robe - [x] Crucible axe armour - [x] Crucible tree armour - [x] Cuckoo knight armour - [x] Cuckoo surcoat - [x] Deathbed dress - [x] Depraved perfumer robe - [x] Dirty chainmail - [x] Drake knight armour - [x] Eccentrics armour - [x] Elden Lord armour - [x] Erdtree surcoat - [x] Errant sorcerer robe - [x] Exile armour - [x] Eye surcoat - [x] Fell omen cloak - [x] Festive garb - [x] Fia’s robe - [x] Finger maiden robe - [x] Fingerprint armour - [x] Fire monk armour - [x] Fire prelate armour - [x] Foot soldier tabard - [x] Fur rainment - [x] Gelmir knight armour - [x] Godrick knight armour - [x] Godskin apostle robe - [x] Godskin noble robe - [x] Goldmask’s rags - [x] Gravekeeper cloak - [x] Guardian garb - [x] Guardian garb full bloom - [x] Haligtree crest surcoat - [x] Haligtree knight armour - [x] High page clothes - [x] Highwayman cloth armour - [x] Hoslows armour - [x] Ivory draped tabard - [x] Juvenile scholar robe - [x] Kaiden armour - [x] Knight armour - [x] Land of reeds armour - [x] Lazuli robe - [x] Leather armour - [x] Leather draped tabard - [x] Leyndell knight armour - [x] Lionel’s armour - [x] Lord of bloods robe - [x] Lusat’s robe - [x] Malenia armour - [x] Malformed dragon armour - [x] Malikeths armour - [x] Marais robe - [x] Marionette soldier armour - [x] Mausoleum knight armour - [x] Mausoleum surcoat - [x] Mushroom body - [x] Night maiden armour - [x] Nights cavalry armour - [x] Nobles traveling garb - [x] Nomadic merchants finery - [x] Nox monk armour - [x] Nox swordstress armour - [x] Officials attire - [x] Old aristocrat gown - [x] Omen armour - [x] Omenkiller robe - [x] Page garb - [x] Perfumers robe - [x] Perfumers traveling garb - [x] Preceptors long gown - [x] Prisoner clothing - [x] Prophet robe - [x] Queens robe - [x] Radahns lion armour - [x] Raging wolf armour - [x] Raptors black feathers - [x] Raya lucarian robe - [x] Redmane knight armour - [x] Redmane surcoat - [x] Ronins armour - [x] Rotten gravekeeper cloak - [x] Royal knight armour - [x] Royal remains armour - [x] Rulers robe - [x] Sage robe - [x] Sanguine noble robe - [x] Scale armour - [x] Scaled armour - [x] Scarlet tabard - [x] Shaman furs - [x] Snow witch robe - [x] Spellblades traveling attire - [x] Travelers clothes - [x] Traveling maiden robe - [x] Tree sentinel armour - [x] Tree surcoat - [x] Tree and beast surcoat - [x] Twinned armour - [x] Upper-class robe - [x] Vagabond knight armour - [x] Veterans armour - [x] Vulgar militia armour - [x] War surgeon gown - [x] White reed armour - [x] Zamor armour Arms: - [x] Alberich’s bracers - [x] All-knowing gauntlets - [x] Astrologers gloves - [x] Azur’s manchettes - [x] Bandit manchettes - [x] Banished knights gauntlets - [x] Battlemage manchettes - [x] Beast champion gauntlets - [x] Black knife gauntlets - [x] Black flame monk gauntlets - [x] Blaidds gauntlets - [x] Bloodhound knight gauntlets - [x] Bloodsoaked manchettes - [x] Blue silver bracelets - [x] Briar gauntlets - [x] Bull-goats gauntlets - [x] Carian knights gauntlets - [x] Champion bracers - [x] Cleanrot gauntlets - [x] Confessor gloves - [x] Crucible gauntlets - [x] Cuckoo knight gauntlets - [x] Depraved perfumer gloves - [x] Drake knight gauntlets - [x] Eccentric manchettes - [x] Elden Lord gauntlets - [x] Errant sorcerer manchettes - [x] Exile gauntlets - [x] Fingerprint gauntlets - [x] Fire monk gauntlets - [x] Fire prelate gauntlets - [x] Foot soldier gauntlets - [x] Gauntlets - [x] Gelmir knight gauntlets - [x] Godrick knight gauntlets - [x] Godrick solider gauntlets - [x] Godskin apostle bracelets - [x] Godskin noble bracelets - [x] Gold bracelets - [x] Guardian bracers - [x] Haligtree gauntlets - [x] Haligtree knight gauntlets - [x] Highwayman gauntlets - [x] Hoslows gauntlets - [x] Iron gauntlets - [x] Kaiden gauntlets - [x] Knight gauntlets - [x] Land of reeds gauntlets - [x] Leather gloves - [x] Leyndell knight gauntlets - [x] Leyndell soldier gauntlets - [x] Lionel’s gauntlets - [x] Lusats manchettes - [x] Malenias gauntlets - [x] Malformed dragon gauntlets - [x] Malikeths gauntlets - [x] Mausoleum gauntlets - [x] Mausoleum knights gauntlets - [x] Mushroom arms - [x] Nights cavalry gauntlets - [x] Nobles gloves - [x] Nox bracelets - [x] Omen gauntlets - [x] Omenkiller long gloves - [x] Perfumer gloves - [x] Preceptor gloves - [x] Queens bracelets - [x] Radahn soldier gauntlets - [x] Radahns gauntlets - [x] Raging wolf gauntlets - [x] Raya lucarian gauntlets - [x] Redmane knight gauntlets - [x] Ronin’s gauntlets - [x] Royal knight gauntlets - [x] Royal remains gauntlets - [x] Scaled gauntlets - [x] Sorcerer manchettes - [x] Spellblade gloves - [x] Travelers gloves - [x] Travelers manchettes - [x] Traveling maiden gloves - [x] Tree sentinel gauntlets - [x] Twinned gauntlets - [x] Vagabond knight gauntlets - [x] Veterans gauntlets - [x] Vulgar militia gauntlets - [x] War surgeon gloves - [x] Warrior gauntlets - [x] White reed gauntlets - [x] Zamor bracelets Legs: - [x] Alberich’s trousers - [x] All-knowing greaves - [x] Aristocrat boots - [x] Astrologer trousers - [x] Bandit boots - [x] Banished knights greaves - [x] Battlemage leg wraps - [x] Beast champion greaves - [x] Black knife greaves - [x] Blackflame monk greaves - [x] Blaidd’s greaves - [x] Bloodhound knight greaves - [x] Blue silver mail skirt - [x] Briar greaves - [x] Bull-goats greaves - [x] Carian knight greaves - [x] Chain leggings - [x] Champion gaiters - [x] Cleanrot greaves - [x] Cloth trousers - [x] Commoners shoes - [x] Confessor boots - [x] Consorts trousers - [x] Crucible greaves - [x] Cuckoo knight greaves - [x] Depraved perfumer trousers - [x] Drake knight greaves - [x] Duelist greaves - [x] Eccentrics breeches - [x] Elden Lord greaves - [x] Errant sorcerer boots - [x] Exile greaves - [x] Finger maiden shoes - [x] Fingerprint greaves - [x] Fire monk greaves - [x] Fire prelate greaves - [x] Foot soldier greaves - [x] Fur leggings - [x] Gelmir knights greaves - [x] Godrick knight greaves - [x] Godrick solider greaves - [x] Godskin apostle trousers - [x] Godskin noble trousers - [x] Gold waistwrap - [x] Guardian greaves - [x] Haligtree greaves - [x] Haligtree knight greaves - [x] Hoslows greaves - [x] Kaiden trousers - [x] Knight greaves - [x] Land of reeds greaves - [x] Leather boots - [x] Leather trousers - [x] Leyndell knight greaves - [x] Leyndell soldier greaves - [x] Lionel’s greaves - [x] Malenias greaves - [x] Malformed dragon greaves - [x] Malikeths greaves - [x] Mausoleum knight greaves - [x] Mushroom legs - [x] Nights cavalry greaves - [x] Nobles trousers - [x] Nomadic merchants trousers - [x] Nox greaves - [x] Old aristocrat shoes - [x] Old sorcerers leg wraps - [x] Omen greaves - [x] Omenkiller boots - [x] Page trousers - [x] Perfumer sarong - [x] Preceptors trousers - [x] Prisoner trousers - [x] Prophet trousers - [x] Queens leggings - [x] Radahn solider greaves - [x] Radahns greaves - [x] Raging wolf greaves - [x] Raya lucarian greaves - [x] Redmane knights greaves - [x] Ronins greaves - [x] Rotten duelists greaves - [x] Royal knight greaves - [x] Royal remains greaves - [x] Sage trousers - [x] Sanguine noble waistcloth - [x] Scaled greaves - [x] Shaman leggings - [x] Snow witch skirt - [x] Sorcerers leggings - [x] Spellblade trousers - [x] Travelers boots - [x] Travelers slops - [x] Traveling maiden boots - [x] Tree sentinel greaves - [x] Twinned greaves - [x] Vagabond knight greaves - [x] Veterans greaves - [x] Vulgar militia greaves - [x] War surgeon trousers - [x] Warrior greaves - [x] White reed greaves - [x] Zamor legwraps
Talismans: - [x] Crimson amber medallion - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Crimson seed talisman - [x] Blessed dew talisman - [x] Cerulean amber medallion - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Cerulean seed talisman - [x] Viridian amber medallion - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Green turtle talisman - [x] Arsenal charm - [x] Great-jar’s Arsenal - [x] Erdtrees favour - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Radagons scarseal - [x] Radagons soreseal - [x] Marikas scarseal - [x] Marikas soreseal - [x] Starscourge heirloom - [x] Prosthesis-wearer heirloom - [x] Stargazer heirloom - [x] Two fingers heirloom - [x] Dragoncrest shield talisman - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Dragoncrest greatshield talisman - [x] Spelldrake talisman - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Flamedrake talisman - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Boltdrake talisman - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Haligdrake talisman - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Pearldrake talisman - [x] +1 - [x] +2 - [x] Immunising horn charm - [x] +1 - [x] Stalwart horn charm - [x] +1 - [x] Clarifying horn charm - [x] +1 - [x] Mottled necklace - [x] +1 - [x] Prince of deaths pustule - [x] Prince of deaths cyst - [x] Dagger talisman - [x] Curved sword talisman - [x] Twinblade talisman - [x] Axe talisman - [x] Hammer talisman - [x] Spear talisman - [x] Lance talisman - [x] Claw talisman - [x] Greatshield talisman - [x] Arrow’s sting talisman - [x] Arrow’s reach talisman - [x] Graven-school talisman - [x] Graven-mass talisman - [x] Faithful’s canvas talisman - [x] Flock’s canvas talisman - [x] Primal glintstone blade - [x] Moon of nokstella - [x] Old lords talisman - [x] Radagon icon - [x] Roar medallion - [x] Companion jar - [x] Perfumers talisman - [x] Carian filigreed crest - [x] Warrior jar shard - [x] Shard of Alexander - [x] Godfrey icon - [x] Bull-goats talisman - [x] Blue dancer charm - [x] Magic scorpion charm - [x] Fire scorpion charm - [x] Lightning scorpion charm - [x] Sacred scorpion charm - [x] Crucible scale talisman - [x] Crucible feather talisman - [x] Crucible knot talisman - [x] Red-feathered branchsword - [x] Blue-feathered branchsword - [x] Ritual sword talisman - [x] Ritual shield talisman - [x] Assassins crimson dagger - [x] Assassins cerulean dagger - [x] Winged sword insignia - [x] Rotten winged sword insignia - [x] Millicent’s prosthesis - [x] Godskin swaddling cloth - [x] Kindred of rots exultation - [x] Lord of bloods exultation - [x] Takers cameo - [x] Ancestral spirits horn - [x] Gold scarab - [x] Silver scarab - [x] Crepus’ vial - [x] Concealing veil - [x] Longtail cat talisman - [x] Furled finger’s trick-mirror - [x] Host’s trick-mirror - [x] Shabiri’s woe - [x] Daedicar’s woe - [x] Sacrificial twig
Ashes: Basic ashes: - [x] Wandering noble - [x] Noble sorcerer - [x] Nomad - [x] Putrid corpse - [x] Skeletal militiaman - [x] Skeletal bandit - [x] Albunaric - [x] Winged misbegotten - [x] Demi human - [x] Clayman - [x] Oracle envoy - [x] Lone wolf - [x] Rotten stray - [x] Giant rat - [x] Warhawk - [x] Land squirt - [x] Spirit jellyfish - [x] Miranda sprout - [x] Fanged imp - [x] Soldjars of Fortune - [x] Archer - [x] Greatshield solider - [x] Page - [x] Vulgar militia - [x] Marionette soldier - [x] Avionette soldier - [x] Kaiden sellsword - [x] Mad pumpkinhead - [x] Fire monk - [x] Ancestral follower - [x] Azula beastmen - [x] Man-serpent - [x] Crystalian - [x] Kindred of rot - [x] Glintstone sorcerer - [x] Twinsage sorcerer - [x] Godrick soldier - [x] Raya Lucaria soldier - [x] Leyndell soldier - [x] Radahn soldier - [x] Haligtree soldier - [x] Mausoleum soldier Renowned ashes: - [x] Stormhawk Deenh - [x] Banished knight Oleg - [x] Banished knight Engvall - [x] Bloodhound knight Floh - [x] Battlemage Hughes - [x] Latenna the Albunaric - [x] Perfumer Tricia - [x] Depraved perfumer Carmaan - [x] Omenkiller Rollo - [x] Blackflame monk Amon - [x] Ancient Dragon knight Kristoff - [x] Redmane knight Ogha - [x] Lhutel the headless - [x] Cleanrot knight Finlay - [x] Black knife Tiche - [x] Mimic tear Puppets: - [x] Finger maiden Therolina - [x] Jarwight - [x] Dolores the sleeping arrow - [x] Nepheli Loux - [x] Dungeater - [x] Night maiden and swordstress
Ashes of war: - [x] Stamp (upward cut) - [x] Stamp (sweep) - [x] Wild strikes - [x] Lions claw - [x] Cragblade - [x] Kick - [x] Endure - [x] Ground slam - [x] Earthshaker - [x] Hoarah Loux’s earthshaker - [x] War cry - [x] Barbaric roar - [x] Braggart’s roar - [x] Trolls roar - [x] Spinning slash - [x] Impaling thrust - [x] Piercing fang - [x] Repeating thrust - [x] Double slash - [x] Sword dance - [x] Unsheathe - [x] Quickstep - [x] Bloodhounds step - [x] Raptor of the mists - [x] Beasts roar - [x] Square off - [x] Charge forth - [x] Spinning strikes - [x] Giant hunt - [x] Stormblade - [x] Storm assault - [x] Stormcaller - [x] Storm stomp - [x] Vacuum slice - [x] Phantom slash - [x] Determination - [x] Royal knights resolve - [x] Glintstone pebble - [x] Glintblade phalanx - [x] Carian greatsword - [x] Carian grandeur - [x] Spinning weapon - [x] Loretta’s slash - [x] Gravitas - [x] Waves of darkness - [x] Flaming strike - [x] Flame of the redmanes - [x] Eruption - [x] Prelates charge - [x] Blackflame tornado - [x] Thunderbolt - [x] Lightning slash - [x] Lightning ram - [x] Sacred blade - [x] Prayerful strike - [x] Sacred ring of light - [x] Sacred order - [x] Shared order - [x] Golden land - [x] Golden slam - [x] Golden vow - [x] Vow of the indomitable - [x] Holy ground - [x] Poisonous mist - [x] Poison moth flight - [x] Blood blade - [x] Bloody slash - [x] Blood tax - [x] Seppuku - [x] Ice spear - [x] Chilling mist - [x] Hoarfrost stomp - [x] Spectral lance - [x] Lifesteal fist - [x] White shadow’s lure - [x] Assassins gambit - [x] Mighty shot - [x] Through and through - [x] Barrage - [x] Sky shot - [x] Enchanted shot - [x] Rain of arrows - [x] Parry - [x] Golden parry - [x] Storm wall - [x] Shield bash - [x] Shield crash - [x] Barricade shield - [x] Thops’ barrier - [x] Carian retaliation - [x] No skill
Spells: Sorceries: - [x] Adula’s moonblade - [x] Ambush shard - [x] Ancient death rancor - [x] Briars of punishment - [x] Briars of sin - [x] Cannon of Haima - [x] Carian greatsword - [x] Carian phalanx - [x] Carian piercer - [x] Carian retaliation - [x] Carian slicer - [x] Collapsing stars - [x] Comet - [x] Comet azur - [x] Crystal barrage - [x] Crystal burst - [x] Crystal release - [x] Crystal torrent - [x] Eternal darkness - [x] Explosive ghostflame - [x] Fias mist - [x] Founding rain of stars - [x] Freezing mist - [x] Frozen armament - [x] Gavel of Haima - [x] Gelmirs fury - [x] Glintblade phalanx - [x] Glintstone arc - [x] Glintstone cometshard - [x] Glintstone icecrag - [x] Glintstone pebble - [x] Glintstone stars - [x] Gravity well - [x] Great glintstone shard - [x] Great oracular bubble - [x] Greatblade phalanx - [x] Loretta’s greatbow - [x] Loretta’s mastery - [x] Lucidity - [x] Magic downpour - [x] Magic glintblade - [x] Magma shot - [x] Meteorite - [x] Meteorite of Astel - [x] Night comet - [x] Night maidens mist - [x] Night shard - [x] Oracle bubbles - [x] Rancorcall - [x] Ranni’s dark moon - [x] Rennala’s full moon - [x] Rock blaster - [x] Rock sling - [x] Roiling magma - [x] Rykard’s rancor - [x] Scholars armament - [x] Scholars shield - [x] Shard spiral - [x] Shatter Earth - [x] Shattering Crystal - [x] Star shower - [x] Starlight - [x] Stars of ruin - [x] Swift glintstone shard - [x] Terra magica - [x] Thops’ barrier - [x] Tibia summons - [x] Unseen blade - [x] Unseen form - [x] Zamor ice storm Incantations: - [x] Agheel’s flame - [x] Ancient dragons lightning strike - [x] Ancient dragons lightning spear - [x] Aspects of the crucible: Breath - [x] Aspects of the crucible: Horns - [x] Aspects of the crucible: Tail - [x] Assassins approach - [x] Barrier of Gold - [x] Beast claw - [x] Bestial constitution - [x] Bestial sling - [x] Bestial vitality - [x] Black blade - [x] Black flame - [x] Blackflame blade - [x] Blackflame’s protection - [x] Blackflame ritual - [x] Blessing of the erdtree - [x] Blessings boon - [x] Blood boon - [x] Bloodflame blade - [x] Bloodflame talons - [x] Borealis’ mist - [x] Burn O flame - [x] Catch flame - [x] Cure poison - [x] Darkness - [x] Death lightning - [x] Discus of light - [x] Divine fortification - [x] Dragonbolt blessing - [x] Dragonclaw - [x] Dragonfire - [x] Dragonice - [x] Dragonmaw - [x] Ekzykes decay - [x] Elden stars - [x] Electrify armament - [x] Erdtree heal - [x] Fires deadly sin - [x] Flame fortification - [x] Flame sling - [x] Flame of the fell god - [x] Flame, cleanse me - [x] Flame, fall upon them - [x] Flame, grant me strength - [x] Flame, protect me - [x] Fortissax’s double lightning spear - [x] Frenzied burst - [x] Frozen lightning spear - [x] Giantsflame take thee - [x] Glintstone breath - [x] Golden lightning fortification - [x] Golden vow - [x] Great heal - [x] Greyoll’s roar - [x] Gurranq’s beast claw - [x] Heal - [x] Honed bolt - [x] Howl of shabriri - [x] Immutable shield - [x] Inescapable frenzy - [x] Lansseax’s glaive - [x] Law of casualty - [x] Law of regression - [x] Lightning fortification - [x] Lightning spear - [x] Lightning strike - [x] Litany of proper death - [x] Lords aid - [x] Lords divine fortification - [x] Lords heal - [x] Magic fortification - [x] Magma breath - [x] Noble presence - [x] O, Flame! - [x] Order healing - [x] Order’s blade - [x] Pest threads - [x] Placidusax’s ruin - [x] Poison armament - [x] Poison mist - [x] Protection of the erdtree - [x] Radagons rings of light - [x] Rejection - [x] Rotten breath - [x] Scarlet aeonia - [x] Scouring blackflame - [x] Shadow bait - [x] Smarag’s glintstone breath - [x] Stone of Gurranq - [x] Surge, O flame - [x] Swarm of flies - [x] The flame of frenzy - [x] Theodorix’s magma - [x] Triple rings of light - [x] Unendurable frenzy - [x] Urgent heal - [x] Vykes dragonbolt - [x] Whirl, O flame - [x] Wrath of Gold

Looking to buy a few games from current humble bundles. I’d buy them myself but am trying to avoid getting too many duplicates.
Want:

• Lost in Play,
• En garde,
• Atari 50,
• Grindstone,
• Wishlist (scroll to the bottom)

KEYS AVAILABLE:

1. 112 Operator
2. 112 Operator
3. 911 Operator
4. 911 Operator
5. A Juggler's Tale
6. A Mortician's Tale
7. ADOM (Ancient Domains Of Mystery
8. Aegis Defenders
9. Age of Wonders Planetfall
10. Ageless
11. Agent in Depth
12. Agents of Mayhem
13. Alchemy Garden
14. Alien Spidy
15. Aliens: Fireteam Elite
16. Almost There: The Platformer
17. American Fugitive
18. Amnesia: Rebirth
19. Arboria
20. Arcade Paradise
21. Arcade Spirits
22. Archangel: Hellfire - Fully Loaded
23. As Far As The Eye
24. Automachef
25. Autonauts
26. Autonauts vs PirateBots
27. Aven Colony
28. Backbone
29. Bartlow's Dread Machine
30. Basement
31. Batman™: Arkham City GOTY Edition
32. Battlestar Galactica Deadlock
33. BATTLETECH
34. BATTLETECH DLC Shadow Hawk Pack
35. Before We Leave
36. Behind the Frame: The Finest Scenery
37. Bendy and the Dark Revival
38. Beneath Oresa
39. Between the Stars
40. Beyond Eyes
41. Beyond The Wire
42. Big Crown®: Showdown
43. Biomutant
44. Black Book
45. Blade Assault
46. Bomber Crew
47. Book of Demons
48. Book of Demons
49. Boreal Blade
50. Boundless
51. BPM: BULLETS PER MINUTE
52. Broken Age
53. Broken Age
54. Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
55. Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
56. Brutal Legend
57. Brütal Legend
58. Calico
59. Calico
60. Call of Cthulhu
61. Capitalism 2
62. Cepheus Protocol
63. Chariot
64. Chess Ultra
65. Children of Silentown
66. Chivalry 2
67. ChromaGun
68. Citizen Sleeper
69. Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Saga Continues
70. Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Saga Continues
71. Conan Chop Chop
72. Cosmic Osmo and the Worlds Beyond the Mackerel
73. Costume Quest
74. Crown Trick
75. Crying Suns
76. Dark Pictures Anthology: House of Ashe
77. Darksiders Genesis
78. Darksiders II Deathinitive Edition
79. Darksiders Warmastered Edition
80. Darkwood
81. Day of the Tentacle Remastered
82. Deadly Days
83. Dear Esther: Landmark Edition
84. Death Squared
85. DEATH STRANDING DIRECTOR'S CUT
86. Deceive Inc.
87. Demon Turf
88. Desert Child
89. DESOLATE
90. Destroy All Humans!
91. Destroyer: The U-Boat Hunter
92. Dicey Dungeons
93. DiRT Rally
94. DiRT Rally 2.0 - H2 RWD Double Pack
95. DiRT Rally 2.0 - Opel Manta 400
96. Dirt Rally 2.0 - Porsche 911 RGT Rally Spec
97. Disciples: Liberation
98. Disco Elysium - The Final Cut
99. Divekick
100. DmC: Devil May Cry
101. Doom Eternal
102. Double Fine Adventure
103. Driftland: The Magic Revival
104. DUCATI - 90th Anniversary
105. Due Process
106. Dungeon Drafters
107. DUSK
108. Edge Of Eternity
109. El Hijo - A Wild West Tale
110. ELDERBORN
111. Eldest Souls
112. ELEX
113. ELEX II
114. Encased: A Sci-Fi Post-Apocalyptic RPG
115. Endless Space 2
116. Endless Space® 2 - Digital Deluxe Edition
117. Endzone - A World Apart
118. Escape Goat 2
119. Euro Truck Simulator 2
120. Europa Universalis IV
121. Evan's Remains
122. Everdream Valley
123. Evil Genius 2: World Domination
124. Expeditions: Rome
125. Expeditions: Viking
126. Fae Tactics
127. Fahrenheit: Indigo Prophecy Remastered
128. Fantasy Blacksmith
129. Farming Simulator 17
130. Fast & Furious: Spy Racers Rise of SH1FT3R
131. Felix The Reaper
132. Filthy Animals Heist Simulator
133. First Class Trouble
134. Fling to the Finish
135. Flynn: Son of Crimson
136. Fobia - St. Dinfna Hotel
137. Founders' Fortune
138. Frozenheim
139. Fun with Ragdolls: The Game
140. Fury Unleashed
141. Gamedec
142. GARAGE: Bad Trip
143. Gauntlet
144. GemCraft - Frostborn Wrath
145. Generation Zero
146. Genesis Alpha One Deluxe
147. Genesis Noir
148. Ghostrunner
149. GNOG
150. Go Home Dinosaurs
151. Gocco of War
152. Going Under
153. Golden Light
154. Golf Gang
155. Golf With Your Friends - OST
156. Golf With Your Friends + Caddypack DLC
157. Greak: Memories of Azur
158. Greak: Memories of Azur
159. GreedFall
160. Grim Fandango Remastered
161. GRIME
162. Guts and Glory
163. Hack 'n' Slash
164. Hacknet
165. Hammerting
166. Hard West
167. Headlander
168. Heave Ho
169. Heaven's Vault
170. Hell Pie
171. Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice
172. Hello Neighbor + Hello Neighbor Hide an
173. Hellpoint
174. Hellpoint
175. Hexologic
176. Hiveswap Friendsim
177. HIVESWAP: Act 1
178. Hokko Life
179. Homestead Arcana
180. Honey I Joined a Cult
181. Hot Brass
182. Hotshot Racing
183. Hyper Gunsport
184. Hypnospace Outlaw
185. I am not a Monster: First Contact
186. I Expect You To Die
187. If Found...
188. Ikenfell
189. Ikonei Island
190. Immortal Life
191. Indivisible
192. Iron Brigade
193. iron danger
194. Iron Danger
195. John Wick Hex
196. John Wick Hex
197. JUMANJI: The Video Game
198. Just Die Already
199. Katana ZERO
200. Killing Floor 2
201. Killing Floor Incursion
202. Killsquad
203. Kingdom Two Crowns
204. Kingdoms of Amalur: Re-Reckoning - FATE Edition
205. Kraken Academy!!
206. Kyle is Famous: Complete Edition
207. Lake
208. Last Call BBS
209. Legend of Keepers
210. Lethal League Blaze
211. Life is Strange 2: Complete Season
212. Lightmatter
213. Little Big Workshop
214. Little League World Series Baseball 2022
215. Little Orpheus
216. Loop Hero
217. Lords and Villeins
218. Love is Dead
219. Lovecraft's Untold Storie
220. Luck be a Landlord
221. Luna's Wandering Stars
222. Lust from Beyond - M Edition
223. Magicka
224. Mahokenshi - The Samurai Deckbuilder
225. Maid of Sker
226. Main Assembly
227. Manifold Garden
228. Marvel's Midnight Suns Digital+ Edition
229. Mask of the Rose
230. Massive Chalice
231. Mechs & Mercs: Black Talons
232. Men of War: Assault Squad 2
233. Metro Exodus
234. Midnight Suns - Doctor Strange Defenders Skin
235. Milky Way Prince - The Vampire Star
236. Mitsurugi Kamui Hikae
237. Möbius Front '83
238. Monaco
239. Monaco
240. Monster Crown
241. Monster Prom 2: Monster Camp
242. Monster Train (First Class - Collectors Edition)
243. Morbid: The Seven Acolytes
244. MORDHAU
245. Morkredd
246. Mount & Blade: Warband
247. Mr. Prepper
248. Myst III: Exile
249. Myst IV: Revelation
250. Myst V: End of Ages
251. NARUTO TO BORUTO: SHINOBI STRIKER
252. Necromunda: Hired Gun
253. NecroWorm
254. Neon Sundown
255. Neversong
256. Niche - a genetics survival
257. Nimbatus - The Space Drone Constructor
258. No Place Like Home
259. Nobody Saves the World
260. Not Tonight
261. Nowhere Prophet
262. Nuclear Throne
263. Old School Musical
264. OlliOlli World
265. One Way Heroics
266. Operation: Tango
267. Orwell: Ignorance is Strength
268. Out of Reach: Treasure Royale
269. Out of Space
270. Overcooked
271. OVERCOOKED 2
272. Overcooked 2 Surf 'n' Turf Pack DLC
273. Overcooked 2 Too Many Cooks DLC
274. Oxenfree
275. PAC-MAN™ CHAMPIONSHIP EDITION 2
276. Paint the Town Red
277. Paradise Lost
278. Paratopic
279. Partisans 1941
280. Party Hard
281. Patch Quest
282. Pathfinder: Kingmaker - Enhanced Plus Edition
283. Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous
284. PAW Patrol the Movie: Adventure City Calls
285. Paw Paw Paw
286. Pawnbarian
287. PAYDAY 2
288. Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
289. Per Aspera
290. Pesterquest
291. PGA TOUR 2K21
292. PGA Tour 2K21
293. Phantom Doctrine
294. Pine
295. Popup Dungeon
296. Post Void
297. Project Hospital
298. Project Wingman
299. Project Winter
300. Psychonauts
301. Psychonauts
302. Psychonauts in the Rhombus of Ruin
303. Pumpkin Jack
304. RAD
305. RAD
306. Radio Commander
307. Raiden V: Director's Cut
308. Railroad Corporation
309. Railway Empire
310. Railway Empire
311. Rain of Reflections: Set Free
312. Raji: An Ancient Epic
313. Rebel Cops
314. Red Solstice 2: Survivors
315. Red Solstice 2: Survivors
316. Relicta
317. Remnant: From The Ashes
318. Remnants of Naezith
319. Remothered: Broken Porcelain
320. Resident Evil 5 Gold Edition
321. Resident Evil Revelations
322. Retimed
323. Retrowave
324. Ring of Pain
325. Ring of Pain
326. Road 96
327. Road Redemption
328. Rogue : Genesia
329. Rogue Heroes: Ruins of Tasos
330. Rogue Lords
331. Rover Mechanic Simulator
332. Rubber Bandits
333. RUMBLE
334. Rustler
335. S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
336. Sam & Max Save the World
337. Saturday Morning RPG
338. Say No! More
339. Scorn
340. ScourgeBringer
341. Secret Neighbor
342. Shadowhand: RPG Card Game
343. Shadows Awakening
344. Shady Part of Me
345. Shing!
346. Shotgun King: The Final Checkmate
347. shutshimi
348. Siege Survival: Gloria Victis
349. SimpleRockets 2
350. SIMULACRA
351. SIMULACRA
352. SIMULACRA 2
353. Sinner: Sacrifice for Redemption
354. Skullgirls 2nd Encore
355. Skully
356. Slain: Back from Hell
357. Sniper Elite 3
358. Sniper Ghost Warrior Contracts
359. Snowtopia: Ski Resort Builder
360. SONG OF HORROR COMPLETE EDITION
361. SoulCalibur VI
362. Space Crew: Legendary Edition
363. Space Crew: Legendary Edition
364. Speed Brawl
365. Spellcaster University
366. Spelunx and the Caves of Mr. Seudo
367. Spirit of the island
368. Spiritfarer: Farewell Edition
369. Splasher
370. Stacking
371. STAR WARS - Knights of the Old Republic
372. StarCrossed
373. Staxel
374. Stealth 2: A Game of Clones
375. Stick Fight
376. Stick Fight: The Game
377. Stick Fight: The Game
378. Stick Fight: The Game
379. Strange Brigade
380. Strange Brigade
381. Stray Blade
382. Street Fighter V
383. Strider
384. Strikers Edge
385. Struggling
386. Stygian: Reign of the Old Ones
387. Sunless Sea
388. Sunless Skies
389. Sunset Overdrive
390. Super Hexagon
391. Super Meat Boy
392. SUPERHOT
393. Superhot mind control delete
394. Superliminal
395. Superliminal
396. Survivalist: Invisible Strain
397. Surviving the Aftermath
398. Swag and Sorcery
399. Syberia 3
400. System Shock 2
401. System Shock Enhanced Edition
402. SYSTEM SHOCK: ENHANCED EDITION
403. Tabletop Playground
404. Tales of the Tiny Planet
405. Tango Fiesta
406. TaniNani
407. TEMTEM
408. The Assembly
409. The Bard's Tale IV: Director's
410. The Beast Inside
411. The Forest Cathedral
412. The Forgotten City
413. The Invisible Hand
414. The Journey Down: Chapter Three
415. The King's Bird
416. The Manhole: Masterpiece Edition
417. The Messenger
418. The Quarry Deluxe Edition
419. The Serpent Rogue
420. The Survivalists
421. The Uncertain Last quiet day
422. The Walking Dead
423. The Walking Dead
424. The Walking Dead - 400 Days
425. The Walking Dead: A New Frontier
426. The Walking Dead: Final Season
427. The Walking Dead: Michonne - A Telltale Miniseries
428. The Walking Dead: Michonne - A Telltale Miniseries
429. The Walking Dead: Saints & Sinners
430. The Walking Dead: Saints & Sinners VR
431. The Walking Dead: Season Two
432. The Walking Dead: Season Two
433. The Wild Eight
434. The Witch of Fern Island
435. The Witness
436. The Wolf Among Us
437. There is No Light: Enhanced Edition
438. This Is the Police 2
439. This War of Mine
440. This War of Mine
441. Throne of Lies® The Online Game of Deceit
442. Through the Darkest of Times
443. Ticket to Ride
444. Tilt Brush
445. Timelie
446. Tinkertown
447. Tiny Tina's Wonderlands Chaotic Great Edition
448. Tinykin
449. Tools Up
450. Tooth and Tail
451. Torchlight
452. Torchlight II
453. Total Tank Simulator
454. Townscaper
455. Trek to Yomi
456. Tribes of Midgard
457. Trine 4: The Nightmare Prince
458. Tropico 3
459. Tropico 3: Absolute Power
460. Tropico 4
461. Tropico 4
462. Tropico 4: Megalopolis
463. Tropico 4: Modern Times
464. Tropico 4: Pirate Heaven
465. Tropico 4: Plantador
466. Tropico 4: Propaganda!
467. Tropico 4: Quick-dry Cement
468. Tropico 4: Voodoo
469. Tropico Reloaded
470. Trover Saves the Universe
471. Trover Saves the Universe VR
472. Truberbrook / Trüberbrook
473. Turbo Golf Racing
474. Twin Mirror
475. Unexplored 2: The Wayfarers Legacy
476. Unholy Heights
477. UnMetal
478. Valkyria Chronicles 4 Complete Edition
479. Vampire Survivors
480. Vertigo Remastered
481. Vikings - Wolves of Midgard
482. Void Bastards
483. Wargroove
484. Warhammer 40,000: Battlesector
485. Warhammer 40,000: Gladius
486. Warhammer 40,000: Mechanicus Standard
487. Warhammer Age of Sigmar: Realms of Ruin – Ultimate Edition
488. Warhammer: Chaosbane
489. WARSAW
490. WARSAW
491. Wasteland 3
492. We Need to Go Deeper
493. Werewolf: The Apocalypse — Heart of the Forest
494. West of Dead
495. West of Dead
496. Windjammers 2
497. Winkeltje: The Little Shop
498. Wizard of Legend
499. Wizard of Legend
500. Worms Revolution
501. Worms Rumble
502. WWE 2K BATTLEGROUNDS
503. X-Com 2
504. X-Com 2 Reinforcement Pack
505. X-Morph: Defense
506. X-Morph: Defense Complete Pack
507. XCOM 2
508. XCOM CHIMERA SQUAD
509. XCOM® 2 + 2 DLC
510. Yoku's Island Express
511. Yuppie Psycho
512. Zoeti
513. Zombie Driver HD
514. Zombotron
515. Zwei: The Arges Adventure
516. Zwei: The Ilvard Insurrection

WISHLIST:

1. ANIMAL WELL
2. Another Crab's Treasure
3. Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney Trilogy
4. ARMORED CORE VI FIRES OF RUBICON
5. Atari 50: The Anniversary Celebration
6. Baldur's Gate 3
7. Beat Saber
8. Blade & Sorcery
9. Bluey: The Videogame
10. Bomb Rush Cyberfunk
11. Bonelab
12. Bright Memory: Infinite
13. Buckshot Roulette
14. Can of Wormholes
15. Captain Blacksword
16. Car Mechanic Simulator 2021 - Dodge Plymouth Chrysler Remastered
17. Cart Life
18. Classic Marathon 2
19. Classic Marathon Infinity
20. COCOON
21. COMPOUND
22. Coral Island
23. Corn Kidz 64
24. CRISIS CORE -FINAL FANTASY VII- REUNION
25. Crow Country
26. CRUMB Circuit Simulator
27. Cryptmaster
28. Crystal Project
29. CTRL Phreak
30. Deadlink
31. Deltarune
32. DREDGE - The Pale Reach
33. Duck Detective: The Secret Salami
34. Dungeon Munchies
35. Dungeons of Blood and Dream
36. Dyson Sphere Program
37. Eastward
38. Eiyuden Chronicle: Hundred Heroes
39. Fata Deum
40. FINAL FANTASY VII REMAKE INTERGRADE
41. First Cut: Samurai Duel
42. Galactic-Civilizations-iv
43. Golden Idol Mysteries: The Lemurian Vampire
44. Gourdlets
45. Hades II
46. Harold Halibut
47. High On Life: High On Knife
48. Hogwarts Legacy
49. Immortality
50. In Stars and Time
51. Judgment
52. Just Shapes & Beats
53. Keylocker Turn Based Cyberpunk Action
54. Kingmakers
55. LEGO® Star Wars™: The Skywalker Saga
56. Lightyear Frontier
57. Like a Dragon: Infinite Wealth
58. Lil' Guardsman
59. Little Kitty, Big City
60. Live A Live
61. Lone Fungus
62. Lorelei and the Laser Eyes
63. Lossless Scaling
64. Lost Judgment
65. Marvel's Spider-Man: Miles Morales
66. Microcivilization
67. Mina the Hollower
68. Mon Bazou
69. Moncage
70. MULLET MADJACK
71. My Summer Car
72. Myst
73. NEO: The World Ends with You
74. No Umbrellas Allowed
75. NORCO
76. Ooblets
77. OPUS: Echo of Starsong - Full Bloom Edition
78. OVR Toolkit
79. Pacific Drive
80. Paper Trail
81. Peglin
82. Pepper Grinder
83. Persona 5 Royal
84. Phantom Abyss
85. Phantom Brigade
86. Pizza Tower
87. Pseudoregalia
88. Rack and Slay
89. Ratchet & Clank: Rift Apart
90. Remnant II
91. Resident Evil 4 (2023)
92. Return to Monkey Island
93. Reus 2
94. Road Diner Simulator
95. Rogue Star Rescue
96. RP7
97. RPG Time: The Legend of Wright
98. RUMBLE
99. Rusty's Retirement
100. Sakuna: Of Rice and Ruin
101. Samurai Jack: Battle Through Time
102. SAND LAND
103. Sea of Stars
104. Secrets of Grindea
105. Sekiroâ„¢: Shadows Die Twice - GOTY Edition
106. Settlement Survival
107. Shadow Gambit: The Cursed Crew
108. Shadow Legend VR
109. Shashingo: Learn Japanese with Photography
110. Slay the Princess
111. Slay the Spire 2
112. Slice & Dice
113. Soulstone Survivors
114. Spiritfall
115. Spirittea
116. STAR OCEAN THE SECOND STORY R
117. Star Trek: Resurgence
118. Star Wars: Dark Forces Remaster
119. Starfield
120. Starship Troopers - Terran Command
121. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Shredder's Revenge
122. The Riftbreaker
123. The Wandering Village
124. Turnip Boy Robs a Bank
125. UNDERDOGS
126. Underspace
127. Vampire: The Masquerade® - Bloodlines™ 2
128. Viewfinder
129. Walkabout Mini Golf VR
130. Whirligig VR Media Player
131. Workers & Resources: Soviet Republic
132. Zeno Clash

Good afternoon anybody, somebody, nobody, & everybody
all evidence DM ME
My name is Jain Kunwar
I am a retail trader for 3.5 years.
I am not an ape, I am not an institutional investor, I am not a hedge fund.
Nor do I have any clients.
I do not provide personalised investment advice for fees or commissions or tax purposes.
I'm just an individual investor who did my own research like Detective Columbo/Pikachu.
I come from a broken family, I have been to prison, I have been homeless even at 15 for many years.
I am not a good person, but I am seeking salvation from God.
I been doing Heroin since the age of 13, sober 8 years since the day I pleaded out to God in Merton station London at 1 am asking God to save me.
Which I believe in myself he did because shortly…….
Soon after, I went prison by confessing all my crimes and the judge let me run it concurrently for being honest that I need help and I had no foundation and healed a bit moving forwards in life.
I was born on May 10th, 1994, in Nepal Butwal. Home of the Gurkhas
I came to England 2002 November & have lived here since.
I class my self as Asian British A9
I have been repenting for my sins happily, paying off my debts and learning to be a good human being for I was a sinner till I met Jesus in Church of England.
My one and only father Jesus.
I have been following and invested in Game stop for a long time.
I started educating myself about the stock market since then.
I have been buying shares of GameStop Since 2021 But since 2021 June been incurring losses through market manipulation techniques I.E.
I had been denied withdrawals/ buying or selling options, leveraging options from Capital.NLY

Which incurred me 6 Grand losses on June 2021 and God knows how much/many other investors BIG or small in all exchanges that this effected.
I also have evidence of numerous times the trading app has halted its trade for more then 30 minutes to an hour in a single day! But for these I have videos more then images
I am happy to hand it over if you tell me where to send it.
They kept ignoring me until a month ago in May the 10^th 2024 will touch base here later(miracle)
I have what’s app records of me trying to make complaints throughout the years with no redemption or straight answers.
I once spoke to an employee male & female one said, “We are experiencing some technical difficulties” this was about 1-2 years ago.
The Craziest thing was the ticker was moving in other exchanges just not in the one I was trading from.
Once it didn’t even open for 1.5 hours when it was open everywhere else
It finally opened at 10:49 how I know? I experienced this.
Under the FCA regulations all registered Trading Companies have a duty to protect investors from glitches and “technical difficulties”
Which They failed to do so for me I speak for myself and only what I have experienced.
The company even has glitched my leveraging system of 5-1 which was the setting since joining the company.
where, even if you pick 5-1 you only receive 2-1.
I have evidence of this as well & it’s not the first time either.
I know this has been done 100x of times if you take a Deeper Dive in the company’s own trading platform.
You won’t be able to find in other exchanges as other exchanges are working well so you cannot see the reason as its all “inter- linked”.
“Inter-linked “exchanges one falls apart whilst others are moving causing direct market manipulation.
Quoting blade runner “inter-linked”


Since then, I have been sent death threats anonymously.
Which also I can prove It was sent by him by connecting some dots with you
I met the owner in Wembley stadium in Corporate Box I was invited by Mr Stephen O
He contacted me and invited me to his corporate box on 8/6/24 I went there to find clarity as hackers have been going through my phones and social media with death threats.
Currently he is getting his hackers to find out where my siblings are and such as those are the type of questions I am getting in my social media platforms.
I call it phsing, smishing and vhising all 3 were used on my network.
Using carefully relaying questions in segment to build a definitive answer by narrowing down the wrong answers.
Like how it asks me what horoscope I am, Questions like use your initials to create a Japanese name.
Narrowing down an answer what every analytical mind would do.
I have been going through this since May 10^th after he contacted me.
I have said my name is J to every one of these questions should be in my social media history.
Notice how it says JJ DEAD MAN COVER
i.e
Notice how I met the Owner at 8/6/24 1 pm corporate box …there are plenty cameras there.
I like to be clear here I do not know this person or have his number for him to be coming to my social media as people “whom I know”.
I believe it was the vhising technique of his goons on hire you can see my history for the past month in call history I been getting scam calls left right and centre.
I will also give a copy of screen recording on request.
Then I went home and put a video of his trading app chart not moving like other exchanges for example having a 1-minute ticker symbol does not move for 30 minutes in graph line on my social media suddenly,
I see a people “whom you might know” soon after I posted the video.
I only went to the corporate box because he told me he has over 300 people retail traders coming which I was the only retail there apart from 5 millionaires 4 of which I believe they own the company only speculation whom others are currently.
But I felt an eerily vibe So I did not eat their food or take their hospitality which was probably funded by investors like me getting robbed blind because he thought no one would notice.
I also met a man there I spoke to him he told me His trading account was transferred to their platform.
The clue is there which accounts have been moved without consent or choice?
He will plan to bring all in one to have more control and doing this also erases all traces of manipulation in the trading platform it moved from a very sly way to delete history.
Should not affect me though I joined capital.com ticker symbol. NLY as my first and only trading app.
I have lost all history of my trade’s funds and even portfolios deleted without notice of consent why is he observing my account and why is he deleting everything without my consent? He knows he did me wrong that’s why because he uses capital.com to manipulate the market into his interest.
I can identify all 4 of them even though I only spoke to Mr S.O over the phone and only know their name.
I ended up being the only retail trader there, A poor man in a Billionaires Club
So out of place
I just can’t figure out why, Can you?
The ticker symbol has to be moving according to the time even if the price does not fluctuate the time has to keep moving like kinetic energy.
It has to be moving unless halted which can be only 35 minutes per day but I have counted over 1 hour gone in some days


I have been through mental trauma with hackers trying to hypnotize me with flashing lights and other spiral colour techniques mind you.
I am an epileptic which I grew out of when I was 15 which is highly reactive to epileptic people.
Miracle indeed, as many don't, certainly not after adult hood.

Also, they have tried to ask me questions to figure out whom I am on my social media,
I got closer to their crimes and my truth and they wanted to know what I know or make me join them as per the invitation I believe bribing me to survive another few years maybe?
Hope you Enjoyed the Corporate box Kenny it was from the money you stole from me!
Steal from the poor how dare you?
pushing pornographic and other Hypno/flashing light techniques to my social media platforms
also using racial harassment by calling me Paki Psycho
At least get the country right! Originally from Nepal BITCH Gurkhas Salute!
We both know whom we are now S.O
Which over the past 3 years have also caused me to lose everything…..
money, love, joy, sanity & dreams.
I have been Robbed constantly from these techniques they use also the withdrawal rejection from 10000 to even 100 this was very recently too. Have some images to reference this too.
I log almost everything I do.
That’s just how I found healing/clarity by writing it down.
I spoke to a person named Emma who told me to withdraw,
I have to show all my cards even the bank card “HSBC” which was bankrupt and stopped without consent.
Jokes on them I still had it Q.Q ahahaaha even after I showed them it didn’t work.
Until 3 days later after I lost 65% of my investment.
I like to point out, I mentioned to HSBC many times I am currently struggling and am willing to pay in an instalment plan.
What I can because I did not want my account to close ever as it would effect my credit score most indefinitely.
Also, the weirdest request was they asked me to show them a picture of the different Barclays Cards I have with the same account number.
saying it must be the same card but it’s the same account number same card basically so why?
I replied, I put the money from my apple pay send it back to my apple pay card he said please send us an email of all your cards indirectly refusing to let me withdraw whilst I am in profit.

So, I sent them by email which I should have on my email “for reference”.
He also mentioned he will be my account manager and watch my account after the first time he called me because I am a “premium” account.
I still am a premium account with minimum 5-1 leveraging glitched to 2-1 with only 400 pounds left in my account and still watches where and when as my judgement has been good when to buy.
Buy low sell high! Or just hold but I couldn’t do any of these.
I believe it took him this long for many years the issue was my real name and my social media are not the same people.
As I do not have a social media account anywhere with my real name.

He started taking control of my account and portfolios since the day he contacted me on 2024 May 5-15 around the same time I started losing again drastically.
Unfortunately, I cannot provide you how much money I had made in profits or losses because “My account manager of a premium account less then 50 grand had deleted all my portfolios and trade history to clear his name”.
My account portfolio was called Bullish-CFD
Glory CFD and 3 gbps cfds I ended up with one named GBP usd
How the name changed I do not know
I suspect he closed my shared and opened it in a different portfolio causing 8888 amc share sale in my account 1112 GME shares.
As these most of these shares were bought months ago which I believe he has to pay for borrowing he doesn’t have to pay if it was new trades, I suspect this happened here.
Why else would I not the Portfolio I had designated names on.
This can also explain why my trade history has been wiped.
I did not do this I did not consent this nor was I notified.
Let me make this clear I do not have any controls or jurisdiction to wipe my history of trades if you could compare with other users to see if they have been wiped out and why it has been wiped out as its detrimental for Securities Agency to have correct data of everything that is going on with trading exchanges.
Which makes me believe more in the investment of AMC & GME.
I also believe Mr S.O prior to 2 years ago before all these new rules started coming, he was using his trading account to artificially increase profits by making a profit/gain.
I.E you open a position in a stock that is about to split in the market or going through one.
Let’s say its 2 5-1 reverse split now its 10 he made 8 decimal gains instead of changing the shares according to the split.
This crime trick he used to manipulate the market ended when sundial went for a share split reverse.
I came to realise this when I ventured in a demo account, and it worked but I didn’t do it with real money as that is not the right way.
I am trying to be good doing it the right way.

I have worked physically demanding jobs for many years working 6 days -7 days per week doing 55-65 hours per week, killed my joy in life and even went without food to invest in this company as I believe in the Company board, company outlook and company fundamentals all 3 checks out as a great investment to my eyes a hat trick to a quad trick now.
Putting money in it almost every month in the past 3-4 years.
My journey ends here with my Losses from market manipulation but I will reveal the truth!!!
They have robbed us again and again even the government has been robbed.
just for their benefit ruined many people’s lives all over the world.
Especially now that the company managed to be stable and grow profits.
But the issue here is not my losses it’s the market manipulation.
the company is doing all they can to not close their losing trade which is the
THE BOX everyone is talking about, but no one is knowing about somebody may know though.
Maybe investigate their wives’ accounts and you might find it on a marginal line red line in this account.
The blonde lady. Wearing navy blue jeans. Bingo!
Mr Stephen O has tried bribing me in social media sending women over my home to seduce me but my dog did her job right! And sensed the intentions I know this because I had a media pushed through my social media saying do you want me to send you two women to seduce me in hiding his criminal behaviours but this is not about me
He has robbed millions of people .

I have evidence of this as well to turn it in his favour as I believe he is short on GameStop which is a direct Conflict of interest “the reasons why I am been having these trading technical issues “
Trying to turn you into a gambler not investor! By taking away the withdraw, buy or sell!!!
You see,
The universe spoke to me, and I am becoming the voice for everybody who are being robbed by this man.
Call it a sign, a cohencidence or just dumb luck!
I am not a messiah though I just uncovered the truth!
2 weeks before my birthday on May 10^th,, a stray kitten gave birth to 4 kittens and left only one behind. The squeeze began on my Birthday no fucking way!!!!!!!!
I/we have since, been taking care of her.
Meet My Newborn Kitten.

At 2 weeks old.

I also have a conspiracy theory on this as an attempt to harm my kitten.
To destroy me and make me stop trading.
I have frozen the medication Dr Elliot not a regular vet from that practice.
Well not the ones we see anyways 2 out 3 times.
My kitten was very ill shortly after taking the medication was also recommended to euthanised my kitten.
If you see her now you won’t believe why they would ever recommend this.
Of course, I argued and took control of the situation and saved her.
When I am back on my feet, I am going to a professional to check it out completely.
I like to remind you I already have a dog in this house for that cat to dare to come in my yard and give birth its like it was meant to be here cats? get it?
She is about 2.2 times her size now! Growing strong !!! just like GAMESTOP
CANT STOP WONT STOP GAME STOP
In Jesus name can I get AMEN!
b4 I continue...
I currently work as a civil engineer and am on the quest to turn my life around in my Pursuit of Happiness.
Thank heavens as I do not even hold a GCSE another miracle!
That I have this job.
I am a troubled child, but I still have dreams... of making it in life.
Which is providing my future wife and kids with everything I did not receive,
love, attention, guidance and more importantly a home they can sleep comfortably knowing they will have a place to sleep again tomorrow.
But I do not blame anyone as it was a first time for everyone being a father... a mother...even me a son just as guilty.
But I want you to keep reading this story… as it is very important if you have lost in the stock market as there are many other stocks that are missing in chart it was probably getting diluted for someone’s benefit to maybe stabilise their losing trading account.
I get the desperation that’s how I felt scrounging, borrowing money when I felt like I was about to be margin called totally human reaction.
The way he gained the money to stabilise it was totally criminal though.
I feel like he is digging himself a bigger and bigger hole and that hole is up some skunks arse hole by now.
I also like to point out Mr S.O has notified me that capital is a British company, but I have seen it being registered in the state of
This is the Final frontier.

My judgement was clouded by addiction made me do bad things...
I apologise to everyone I caused harm/inconvenience in the past and now.
I really am.
From the bottom of my heart.
my actions were clouded by addiction it took me more than a decade to defeat my heroin addiction.
At this sober state, now If you ask me anything; I’ll tell you even if it gets me in trouble
without a second thought.
I like to point out through out my columbo detective move I came across various information some even I should not know.
All I’m seeking is justice and peace right now and I hope someone can help me get this as I have proof for most of these speculations.
But I believe Mr S.O has been sending his hackers to feed numbers into my head by keep pushing it into my feed.
Because of this I purposely lost all my trades as I will not participate in insider trading sent by Mr S.O to convict me to silence.
Realising I was being watched by numerous people.
I went into a state of hallucinations, insanity.
It was hard but I crawled back out of the hackers infiltrating my device to corrupt my mind and decisions.
I suffer with anxiety and depression already too and have been suffering further since Mr S.O has called me.
I just didn’t know this before he called me, and all the pieces started to connect.

As this type of speculations and claims are only for the wealthy and privileged.
I know I am neither.
I am a very poor man with no land no inheritance no support.
Everything I earn is from these hands that push tools and this mind that tries to learn investing.
At my day job I give my 110% physically
at home
I work my mind 110% to try being an experienced smart investotrader as I know once I have knowledge and skill, I can make money easily after.
Currently, I am sharpening my day trading skills to further increase my knowledge from investor to a trader.
I earning ends meet living pay-check to pay-check and I will continue doing so to save earn invest and one day have a place, which my future family can call our home proudly safely.
But I still see the deep value in a growing company as the more room for growth the more gains the investment will make.
I learnt this from reading and following great investors of this decade I.E DFV videos of GameStop 3 years ago.
I especially like the one where we roll the 8 ball and just find a random ticker and analyse it you never know what dumb luck can bring you.
A school dropout like me to GameStop and I have learnt more things than I did in my lifetime.
You can learn anything in YouTube now amazing really we should use technology to assist us not work for us I strongly believe not use it for our own personal gain just because you have coders.
If you look through their trading app they chart doesn’t even revert the history into split prices SUPER MANIPULATION.

1 I love the stock/I believe in the stock.
2 the company has board members who doesn’t even get salary.
For this they have my trust of my investment and that they will do everything in their knowledge and power to make this company successful as toys brings “JOY” even to adults.

I kept putting more and more invested in this company, but the stock is being manipulated so it doesn’t work everyone will lose as how the conflict-of-interest person wants it he has survived until now because of this but there were no major leads of this I believe.
[Again, I am here to speak about GameStop and the TRUTH]()
I still see GameStop as a great investment.
The company survived Covid 19, also is profitable and stable currently.
With all the current market price fluctuations
Also the price has not dropped below 40! pre split price.
which further strengthens my speculation,
I currently own only 18 shares of GameStop I did have over a thousand.
But the company owners of; Capital.com ticker symbol NLY.
Have done everything they can to make me lose a winning investment.
They took my buy button my sell button and even stopped trading for more than 30 mins and hid it from none trading eyes in the bigger picture.
He also took my shares and diluted it I have incurred about 61 grand losses from my history of trading because of these market manipulation techniques over the past 3-4 years.
I as an investor a client of capital trading app was not treated fairly.
1 Even when I have raised complaints numerous time over the past 3-4 years was shrugged off because I am just well a NOBODY.
I call it a poor man's privileges.
2 Under FCA regulations Glitches or technical failures that cause financial harm to customers is a breach of this rule.
3 I am formally writing a complaint here and raising awareness with evidence of market manipulation!
would like support regarding the Law side of things and what i can recover from being ridiculed and robbed.
Using my food & leisure money to invest in this company.
I sacrificed my Joy for this investment with my hard earned money by working 50-60 hours a week labour 52 weeks per year non stop you can check my work rota records sometimes even 70 per week in physically demanding jobs.
1He has sent me Death threats today of what I am revealing now since meeting him in Wembley Stadium 8/6/26 (have a image of sending me death threats after meeting him today using paid hackers)
1 3/half weeks ago he called me to say I am in a premium account there are 300 of you and I would like to invite you to meet him today
which was really weird why is he putting my account on premium and saying He is going to look after it I am retail trader I have barely any money in account!
and deleted all my portfolio and trade history everything wiped clean!
+I suspect this was getting rid of evidence as I am right at the heart of the Griffin
I know why he took ownership from me without my consent and sold it without me knowing by derivatives and decreased the market value for his personal benefits.
Because he is already manipulating using this trading platform to control the prices elsewhere.
I have evidence of this you can only see it just DM me
if you look at the charts in their trading platform you can see it yourself to say it’s not photo shop.
no one else can notice it if you are not using the same app!!
+
2 Mr Stephen and his goons have been manipulating the stock since gamestop! 2021
+prior to 2 years ago his app would increase profits even from a split share!
I came across this information on 2022 You should recheck all files that are linked to him and splitting shares tickers as he has robbed them blind too.
I was the only retail investor, there alongside his corporate buddies which I am happy to identify and stand as witness.
I felt safe though as I don't even Fear the Darkest Night as I always walked by faith and believed in God has a purpose for me too..
A nobody like me maybe could be somebody one day!

(all hail great DFV) got to pay your respects !
I learnt trading since 2021
“Once there was a farmer who sold a pound of butter to a baker every week.
After several weeks of purchasing butter from the farmer the baker decided to weigh it. To insure it was indeed a full pound.
When he weighed it, he discovered the butter felt short of a pound which enraged him and made him feel cheated and decided to take the farmer to court.
The judge asked the farmer what his method is of weighing the butter.
the farmer replied “your honour, I am poor I do not own any exact measuring tool.
How ever I do have a Scale.
The judge then inquired if the farmer uses the scale to measure the butter the farmer explained.
“Your honour I have been buying a 1 pound of loaf from the baker Long before he began purchasing butter from me,
When ever he brings the bread, I place it on the scale and measure out the same weight to give him in return.
So, if the baker is not receiving a pound of butter he is also not delivering a pound of bread as promised.
The moral you get what you give if you try to cheat others of what they promised them.
You will be cheated in return.

KARMA IS REAL AND KARMA WILL PUNISH ALL OF YOU WILL GO PRISON

I’m looking for a new setup to comfortably store my HPA tank (68/4500 carbon dominator) and either some assault rifle (3/4) or pistol (4/5) magazines. Currently I have a cheap molle HPA bag attached to my H-harness from Templar Gear. And my magazines are stacked on the battle belt. But when I’m running they outmost pouches move a lot risking my magazines to fall and the molle getting lose over time.
I’ve came across a SpeedQB setup consisting of their Atompack, Nucleus Chest Rig and a Proton Mag Pouch (either quad assault or 5x pistol). And I’ve came across a HK Army setup consisting of their Reflex backpack and Sector chest rig.
What are your guys opinions (or alternatives)? Do they hold magazines well when running? Is the stichting holding up after multiple uses? Can the excess strap slack be tied up nicely?
The reason I’m asking is because both brands don’t have a reseller in The Netherlands so I cannot fit/test them. Plus I might even have to pay a hefty price for shipping (and possibly even tax). While they are somewhat pricey, if they’re good quality, I’m okay with it.
P.S. if you know a good reseller within the EU, please share 😃

A few years ago I began to question my sexuality and decided to explore that and just see how it goes. I ended up meeting this woman online, she was 8 years older then me (I'm in my late 20s) and she was going through the exact same thing as me, she was unsure if she was a lesbian. I knew I was attracted to both male and female but like a lot of people I wasn't sure if I fancied women or just wanted to be like them 😂 turns out I'm bisexual.
Anyways we spoke for a few weeks and decided to meet up as she was in my area meeting friends (she lived about an hour away from me), I never do this but at the time I decided to meet her as I knew the bar and the area etc. It ended up going well she was nice, nothing happened but we got on and decided to meet up again. We ended up seeing each other (nothing offical but just kind of experimenting with each other) for the next 2 months. The problem was she was a bit full on, she made out like I was the one to finally open her eyes and realise she was a lesbian and because of me it was the first time she felt like her true self, which was great but I wasn't there yet. Looking back I think it's because I was trying to put myself in a box of either straight or gay and because of that I was struggling with myself. Throughout the 3 months of knowing her I was very honest about my feelings and thoughts and we both knew that this was all new to us and we are just trying to figure it all out.
It got to the point where I could tell she was starting to fall in love with me, bearing in mind that at this point we had only known each other for 3 months, and even though she never said those three words it became very clear that she was headed in that direction and kept saying that she will wait for me for as long as it takes for me to feel the same. I felt bad and decided to talk to her about it because I didn't want to lead her on even though I had been open about my feelings from the very start, and she agreed that I have been very honest with her from the start and said she still wants us to keep seeing each other because "I'll feel the same way as her in time". I told her that I didn't know that and maybe we should stop seeing each other. I was very considerate about her feelings and I hated seeing her upset but I didn't know when or if I would ever be open to the world about my "true self" because I didn't know myself and you can't put a timeline on that. I liked her, I did but I just wanted to be her friend as everything was just going way too quick for me when it was just meant to be something casual to figure ourselves out, and I felt awful about everything. She turned nasty if I'm being honest, called me all sorts of names and hated the fact that I had the nerve to ask her to still be friends. I ended up just agreeing and apologising for upsetting her and I understood that she didn't want anything to do with me.
A week after this, she messaged me apologising for how she reacted and agreed to be friends, and said that I've always been respectful of her and her feelings. So, the past two years we haven't seen each other but we message each other occasionally, every few months or so. She's gone on to date other women whereas I've decided not to see anyone, male or female, and just decided to focus on myself for a while.
Now I've got the background of all this, this is the bit I need advice on. A few weeks ago she messaged me asking to meet up with her and her friends for a pride event that was close to me (we haven't seen each other for two years). I said no as I had family plans but I appreciated the invite anyways and I hope she has a good time. The weekend in question arrived and so did the messages, she sent me multiple videos of her friend dancing (like 12 videos, one after the other), I laughed it off saying that it looked like she was having a good time and just thought she was showing off her new girlfriend. She told me multiple times she was single and was basically sending me dozens of drunk messages and talking about the past (see above) at this point it was 1:30am and the texts started at 10pm, I politely said that we'll talk in the morning as she was obviously very drunk and I was tired. She still kept messaging until 3am where I had to eventually mute my phone even though I told her so many times that I really need to sleep and we'll talk the next day.
The next day she laughed off the messages and said that she didn't mean what she said (she misses me, she respects me, I was the only girl she cared about, then we should just delete each other from social media because I obvs don't give a shit about her) the messages switched between nice and nasty but she was drunk so the next day when she apologised I explained that I didn't appreciate the shit she was sending and it wasn't fair what she was putting especially in the early hours of the morning. I probably was a bit harsh but at this point I have been nothing but nice and understanding to her and we was only seeing each other for 3 months from start to finish TWO YEARS AGO, it was a bit too intense and I can't keep going over the past. Again she apologised and I thought that was the end of that and we would just put it down to drunken emotions on her part and move on. Now, two nights ago (two weeks from above) I noticed she deleted me from everything on social media. I stupidly messaged her asking if everything was alright and why she deleted me (I know I probably should've just left it but I wasn't messaging her because I was annoyed she deleted me I was just concerned and didn't know why it would be about something from two weeks prior) she replied back and said "you basically said that what we had meant jack shit to you, you spoke to me like shit and you are just a nasty piece of work" I was shocked by this and it didn't understand where it was all coming from. I replied basically asking how I was nasty and admitted to being pissed off by the constant messaging until 3am. I said that she apologised the next day and I thought that was that and if she was upset by it she should've spoke to me about it like adults rather than just wait 2 weeks and just delete me out of anger. She replied back saying that no one talks to her like shit and gets away with it basically. She said that I was important to her because I was the first girl she'd been with but I obviously don't give a shit about her and never did so why should she respect me. She also said that although I did tell her multiple times to stop messaging me early hours of the morning I could've just muted the chat (which I did in the end) rather than telling her to stop. Again I replied back asking about the way she has spoken to me, not just this occasion but multiple times. And that if I never gave a shit about her at the time I would've just cut all ties when things ended. She had the nerve to put back that I could do a lot worse then her and if she wants to message me something she will and I don't have the right to tell her not too. She's making me feel like the worst person ever for things that happened two years ago.
I've had time to think about things over this weekend and I agree that it's best to remove each other completely (even though she tried to follow me again on social media last night- I ignored the request), but she's just made me feel like shit because I said that things are too intense when we was only seeing each other for three months two years ago, and she needs to move on. We don't have any mutual friends but I'm scared that she's going to out me completely. I'm not out to my family, only my mom, and my friends. I'm not ashamed of my sexuality and I've learnt to accept that I am bisexual. I'm a private person, I'm not hiding it but I'm not broadcasting it to the world either, plus I'm not sure how my grandparents will react and they both have health problems. I've always said that if/when the right person comes along then that's when I'll tell them, I would never hide them and keep them a secret from my family but there's no point saying anything if there isn't anything to say and risk causing problems when I'm not sure how long I'll have my grandparents around for.
Should I just out myself before I'm ready to just so she doesn't have the upper hand or just hope for the best? Sorry for the long post