TL;DR I injured my back because of ridiculous uniform rules and 0 health and safety, I was lured into a meeting under false pretences and lied about, then fired.
on a 2 month contract, working the post room for some awful private school that charges £50k a year when most of the school budget seems to be spent on marble topped desks and shoddy artwork
I thought I'd be walking around with a trolley delivering letters but my job was actually ferrying 20kg+ worth of parcels from one end of the school to the other, dragging them along the floor in a bag. I would then organise them, catalog them and contact anybody who had a package, so lots of lifting and carrying. Any other department would be allowed to request the estates team to carry packages, who would wear appropriate, comfortable, unrestrictive clothing and use a trolley to transport them. Me, it was slim fitting suits and shoes only.
A week later I changed to my normal clothes, this was very much not allowed so I changed back to shirt and trousers, just not so slim-fitting. Nobody said anything against it, my manager in fact commended me for dressing appropriately. I started to notice teachers, other admin staff, anybody really, wearing trainers, these were all people that faced students far more than me, they also dealt with the principal, parents of students whereas I didn't really, I spent most of my time in a room at the back of the school, a dusty little hovel that had lift-up windows that were sealed shut. One rule for me, one rule for everybody else.
There was a large, plastic box that held exams, it was wider than me, heavy alone but would be much heavier depending on how much is in there, and would have to be placed on top of a cabinet that was nearly a foot taller than me. I was hurting my shoulders constantly doing this, and I was not provided with a step ladder to level out the height, in fact it was such a small space the myriad of amazon boxes that were delivered were often in front of that cabinet, making it more difficult.
I put the box in an area on the floor, my heel caught it and the force went straight up my back, and I now have muscle damage in my lower back. I went home early and had a total of 1.5 days off. I was interrogated over the phone, and the day I went in my manager immediately tried to paint it as my error, i disagreed.
Lunch time came, I was lured into an office for a 'back to work meeting' where HR was on Teams, and I was told my work ethic was poor(nobody said anything previously, I was consistently told I was doing a good job), my personal presentation was poor (by the same woman who thanked me for dressing appropriately) and that I had lied on the phone about hospital opening times (how could she know? she didnt even know the name of my hospital, I had to repeat it to her 3 times on the phone, so there is no way she could have told me the operating hours)
I was offered no representation, no time to prepare, I was lied to about the reason for the meeting. And worst of all watching her face smirk when she felt she had caught me in a lie made my feel physically sick (she didn't btw, she lied about me calling her at a certain time, I have screenshots proving there was never even a phonecall at the time she stated, I had been calling starting 90 minutes before she said)
She was so smiley and nice up until the morning when she tried to make me blame myself for my injury, when I said 'well it's not like there's much place to put the box' which she then stormed out and an hour later I was lied about and fired. In the meeting she told me they had THEIR health and safety person do a risk assessment, conveniently they had removed nearly all documents from the box and calculated the weight down to the individual sheet of paper and then used it against me. This does not negate the fact I had to lift it onto something taller than me without the aid of a step ladder (which I also have proof of)
The only upside is that when she tried to break the news that 'it's just not working out' I just said ok bye, walked out and got my things. She followed me into the office and said 'I need your lanyard then I need you to LEAVE.' It is amazing how this subsection of the mildly educated, overfed middle classes will patronise you, treat you utter contempt, outright lie about you, smirk in your face while doing it but two simple, non swear words send them into a self-righteous frenzy.
All of it is he-said-she-said and I'm acutely aware that her words have far more authority, but the two things that do have proof are her lies about the time I called, and the state of the room I worked in as I took a photograph.
If it wasn't obvious already, I live in England

The previous post (written by a medical professional about succinylcholine and backed up by other med professionals in the comments) got me thinking.
The drugging Robert theory is something many people hone in on because of the puncture marks and because of the lack of blood present at the scene. But I've always found this theory questionable for a lot of reasons.
One, I don't find it difficult to believe that all of Robert's puncture marks were the result of action by medical personnel. Sure, you can try to pick apart testimony and see where that leaves you, but that strikes me as a fool's errand. Even if there are a couple of marks not accounted for, I don't think that's all that meaningful. These are high intensity circumstances and medical personnel likely aren't cataloging every poke meticulously. I don't feel like you can draw any conclusions from this.
Two, I reject the notion that drugging and assaulting Robert somehow naturally sprang from Dylan and Joe's BDSM practices. If Dylan and Joe were deep into BDSM and the scene, they likely knew the parameters of what is and isn't acceptable. This is not an acceptable BDSM practice. Obviously, an immoral criminal could give two shits about what is and isn't legal, much less what best practices are in BDSM, but there is nothing in either Dylan or Joe's pasts that would suggest they are criminally-minded or amoral. As far as the BDSM lifestyle making them do something they would never otherwise do, I don't really buy it. It is extremely difficult for me to wrap my head around the idea that they planned this out. This is straight up premeditated sexual assault. Again, NOT a routine part of a BDSM lifestyle. It is criminal activity and both of them would have known that.
Three, I find it very difficult to believe that unbeknownst to Victor, Dylan and Joe drugged, assaulted, and accidentally-ish killed Robert, and that Victor found out and never revealed the truth. Love only goes so far, and again, all three of these men are functioning members of society who gave back to the community and cared about things and had friends like Robert Wone, who, by all accounts, was a great guy. Victor, Dylan, and Joe were not the criminal element. I find it hard to believe that they carried out this brutal, absolutely messed up plan without one of them caving because of the guilt. Especially Victor, who likely stumbled onto it after the fact.
Four, I know the tox screen doesn't cover every drug known to man, but it covers a whole lot of them. The surgeon in the previous post basically blew up Brett & Alice's theory that they obtained paralytic, untraceable drugs from Joe's brother by pointing out that phlebotomists would absolutely not have access to this drug. Is there some mystery, untraceable paralytic that Joe and Dylan could have gotten their hands on in the period of time between Robert deciding to spend the night at their house and then spending the night? I mean...anything is possible, I suppose. But I just find this a bit unbelievable. It's not like people in the BDSM community were like - hey, yeah, now that you mention it, all of us use XYZ drug to incapacitate our partners! That didn't happen. No other drugs have even been offered up as possibilities. Nobody can quite say what it is or where they would have gotten it. That's why I think this mystery drug doesn't actually exist. I don't think Robert was drugged.
Five, I think B&A were very quick to write off the notion that Robert was sexually involved with Joe and/or his partners. And I get it. The poor man is dead and left a grieving widow behind. Even if you're fully comfortable with the notion of gay relationships and polyamory and BDSM (many people are not comfortable with any of this, mind), you still have to contend with the lying and cheating. And that sucks. Nobody wants to say anything negative about a murder victim. But I do not think that Robert being bisexual and cheating on his wife is out of the realm of possibility. Not to mention, it might not have been that he ever actively looked to hook up with men. Maybe this is something that occasionally happened with Joe and that's it. People who are bisexual aren't necessarily always on the hunt for sex from all genders. They may not even think of themselves as bisexual - they may think of them as straight with some caveats.
Six, the lack of info about sexual interest in men on his phone and computer doesn't mean much to me. Again, there's no reason to assume he was actively looking for this. But even if he was, he might not have used electronic devices to do it. This did not happen in 2020. This was in 2006. People did less online. The internet was more basic. Think about the fact that Robert wrote emails before bed. He didn't text, he didn't message. He emailed. Technology and our relationship to it was different.
Seven, a side note on time-stamped emails. I don't know that Robert wrote those unsent emails or not, but I do think the time stamps can't be relied upon. Blackberry's are weird, and the time-stamping of emails was an issue with them (go look at Crackberry forums). The time stamp on an incoming email was based on when the email was actually received (not sent) and the time stamp on the unsent draft on an email (Like we have here) would reflect the time it was drafted according to that Blackberry. And, notably, you set the time on your Blackberry yourself. Let's say you were supposed to get a document to someone by 10 am and you're behind. You could, with a Blackberry, finish the document at 3 pm, set your phone to 10 am, draft an email and send it, and it would be time stamped in your email sent box with 10 am. When your boss asks you why the document wasn't sent until three, you could say, no, no, I sent it at 10 am - look! And show them your sent box time stamp, which says 10 am. I know people who did this all the time. Many Blackberry users knew of this hack. So I'm just saying, I don't put much into the time stamp in the outbox, as it could have been easily adjusted by Robert or by someone else.
Here's my two cents:
I think there was some sort of sexual history between Joe and Robert. I have no idea what the nature of this was, but I think it was there. I think Joe & Dylan were actively looking for a third partner in bed (I believe there was some evidence to this on online dating sites or message boards?). I think Joe propositioned Robert, maybe when Robert asked to stay over, or maybe when he arrived, and I think Robert agreed.
Then I think something went wrong. I don't know what, but it could have had to do with breath play or accidental smothering. I think from there, my analysis is about the same as Brett & Alice's: Dylan and Joe thought Robert was dead, stabbed him to stage an intruder murder, and then Victor came downstairs and screamed.
Specifics of why I think this scenario fits better:
1) it explains the men's silence. Ultimately, they are responsible for an accidental death rather than a purposeful assault and the resulting murder of Robert. I can see how Victor especially, but really, all of them, would be more predisposed to staying quiet in this scenario - because they would feel less guilty. Second, they would not want to out Robert or destroy his legacy by telling the world he was having sex with them. They were all really adamant that Robert was straight, and that struck me as odd. If they had sexually abused him without his consent, wouldn't it seem more likely for them to plead ignorance regarding his sexuality or even muddy the waters? But they really stuck to this point, which makes me wonder if they weren't trying to protect Robert's reputation.
2) It fits better with Joe and Robert's history of friendship. Unless Joe is an absolute psychopath, again, I have a lot of trouble imagining him sedating and sexually assaulting one of his oldest friends.
3) It eliminates the need for a mystery untraceable paralytic/sedative/whatever.
4) It fits better with BDSM practices
5) It fits better with the reputation of all men involved - doesn't require us to buy into some hidden depravity that hadn't surfaced before and hasn't surfaced since
6) It does a better job of explaining the traces of semen. I guess there are ways to produce orgasm while a person is unconscious (ICK) but it's a heck of a lot easier to produce one when a person is conscious and involved.
I know this is a controversial take, and I'm not at all looking to besmirch Robert's legacy. I think it's important to remember the human in all these men. I can see Robert being confused and a little ashamed and hiding a complicated sexuality. I can see three generally upstanding men freaking out after kinky sex goes wrong. I can see those men refusing to talk about it because it was a horrible accident and outing their friend would only cause more pain.
On the other hand, I have a hard time seeing those two generally upstanding men plotting out a horrific assault on an unsuspecting man who has been friends with one of them for more than a decade, or the third going along with the cover up of a horrific, premeditated crime.
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I'm not here to shit on the competition because the Cyber Security market is huge and the need is greater then the market as a whole is investing in for protection.
That said, it would appear the Palo Alto had announced a critical flaw in their PAN-OS. It's a zero day and apparently has been exploited since March 26th.
They are now disclosing more details that makes this exploit a little more serious that initially suggested.
https://thehackernews.com/2024/04/palo-alto-networks-discloses-more.html
The U.S. Cybersecurity and Infrastructure Security Agency (CISA) has also added the shortcoming to its Known Exploited Vulnerabilities (KEV) catalog, ordering federal agencies to secure their devices by April 19, 2024.
According to information shared by the Shadowserver Foundation, approximately 22,542 internet-exposed firewall devices are likely vulnerable to the CVE-2024-3400. A majority of the devices are in the U.S., Japan, India, Germany, the U.K., Canada, Australia, France, and China as of April 18, 2024.
This is a big deal as no cyber companies want their name tarnished in a breach. Quite often the breaches are unrelated to the company providing the protection. However, in these type of cases there can be enormous impacts in the customers trust and the companies bottom line for years to come.
Considering the sectors Blackberry is working in though this could actually play into a little speculation run up in the short term. Maybe some will see the diligence BB put into enhancing their product suite. The "war" hardened product could also be more and more of interest to potential customers too.
It will be interesting to see how Palo handles the fall-out as it seems that non-disclosure is becoming less and less tolerated. So far, their response seems a little lack luster .

Hi, folks! You might have seen my Pineward and Zoologist reviews over on fragrance, but if you haven't, I'm Niles, and I'm a 24 year old sapphic from New England. Some years ago my immunse system decided to go rogue and eat my peripheral nerve endings, disabling me and keeping me at home with my parents, so I've gotten into perfume/fragrance as a way of making my life more interesting without the accessibility obstacles that come with other hobbies like, say, knitting. I jokingly refer to it as "habitat enrichment" - you know how periodically zoos will freeze ground beef in funny shapes and give it to the tigers so they can have some fun? That's essentially what I'm trying to do.
Things I like in perfume: I have a pretty broad taste in scents, and I definitely enjoy things from all of the major scent groupings. I'm least familiar with the incense/spice/amber family of scents, but I do love Karma from Lush and I do love patchouli and dragon's blood, so I'm sure there's scents in that vein that I'd enjoy. I have little experience with ambers/musks/incense such as frankincense and myrrh. I adore fruity scents when they're natural-smelling and true to the fruit. I love a good gourmand so long as it's not sickly, and I've learned I actually like florals much more than I thought I did! (Elizabeth Taylor Gardenia is actually a mainstay of my tiny collection, and I adore Zoologist Hummingbird) My all-time favorite fragrances are foresty, mossy, woodsy/green scents, though I prefer the ones that go for a more atmospheric approach as opposed to what I'll call more "carpentry" and "cut wood" portrayals. Green/mossy/fern notes are catnip for me. I like aquatics, though I prefer freshwater to saltwater, if that makes sense - I'm a river girl. I am by no means opposed to a good oceanic scent, however! My skin prefers "warmer" scents to "cooler" ones and really likes to amp up citrus and patchouli notes. My favorite scents of all are Zoologist's Elephant and Nightingale, along with Lush's Karma and Guardian of the Forest.
Notes in perfume I love that draw me to a scent: Cypress, hinoki, moss, fern, ivy, rice, bamboo, any kind of tea, especially matcha, stone/wet stone/river rocks, rain/mist, petrichor, jasmine, gardenia, orange blossom, cherry blossom, honeysuckle, lilac, peach blossom, lime, bergamot, bitter orange, sweet orange, yuzu, grapefruit, passionfruit, peach, pomegranate, raspberry, cherry, lychee, rhubarb, blackberry.
Notes that make me wary, but aren't deal-breakers: Fig, pear (it seems to go mealy on my skin a lot), coconut (I don't mind it but my mom doesn't love it, at least not in the overly sweet/suntan form it often takes), smoke, caramel, rum/bourbon/whiskey, cinnamon/spice - I find these last four groups can easily overpower everything else and I don't like them enough for that to be a selling point.
Death notes: Blueberry is off-limits thanks to a traumatic incident I refer to only as Wormageddon, I've never liked coffee, mint is for toothpaste and only toothpaste IMO, and I despise pumpkin. I will never weatry anything with fennel, anise, licorice or tarragon, since that particular licorice flavor tastes to me like someone made a creme brulee with asphalt and mouthwash.
Onto the reviews!
I got a wide variety here of a whole bunch of different things, including ones I really wasn’t sure if I’d enjoy, so I often will make a side note if something accomplishes what it sets out to do based on the description, but I just don't enjoy that particular composition, since my taste is obviously not universal and it deserves props for achieving the stated intent.
Packaging Side note: Holy shit was this little package fastened securely. The hellraiser box is less secure than this thing. I felt like Richard Nixon with his childfree pill bottle. I also got a personalized thanks from the seller on the packing slip, which is always a nice touch and part of why I like buying indie.
TAT: Admittedly long, but I knew that going in, and it was firmly within the stated timeframe, so full marks here.
Kana: I won’t lie. I chose this in part because Kana is the name of the main character in a huge, almost novel-length fanfic I’ve been working on. She’s an original character and she’s very dear to me, and while I don’t imagine this is how she would smell, there are aspects of the description that do remind me a bit of her. There’s a warmth to this scent that I can’t quite place. The notes are all coolemore neutral; maybe it’s the teakwood? The cherry blossom is there, though it reads vaguely almondy to me. The lychee isn’t really popping up, which is a bit disappointing since I love lychee. Actually at some point when this dries down, I get mushroom for some godforsaken reason. What? I have no idea what’s doing this, but it’s that unmistakable rubbery yet organic scent which you’ll smell on a button or a shiitake. 3/10
Climbing Star Jasmine: This isn’t sweet at all. It’s like I’m only smelling the petals, not the nectar. It’s still recognizably jasmine (somehow) but… The rubber note is there again. It’s not doing it any favors. Does not pass the vibe check. 2/10
Marshmallow Cake on Mondays: Well shit, I see why this is popular. It is marshmallow forward, and very almondy, too. If I were to bake a cake to match this, it’d be an angel food cake frosted with lightly toasted meringue. There’s a slightly artificial aspect to it, but that honestly doesn’t bother me too much? It’s kinda part of its charm. The one note I have is that I would have liked it more cinnamon forward, I think it would have grounded it more and hidden that artificial note better; as it is now, I don’t really get much cinnamon. Perhaps I would have enjoyed the regular Cake on Mondays more. 6/10
Wild Hunt: Holy shit, this is my forest. This is the forest where I spend every August. I had to sit down, the scent associations were that strong. On my skin, the musks and dragon’s blood come out more than in the bottle; that makes it slightly less of a match, but it’s still incredible. The cedar in this is less jammy than in the Pineward scents, which makes it less abrasive to me, I think. (I did order a bunch of green/nature/foresty scents from Alkemia recently, so I can’t wait to see how they compare!) I smell moss and lichen, too.
I have to take a second paragraph just to sit with this for a bit. This is something special. This makes me ache in a way only Bon Iver music can. Even if every single other scent in this order was unwearable, it was worth every penny just for this. I might cry, guys. This is home. 11/10. Edit: I forgot this was part of the fall/winter catalog and didn’t full-size it in time. Please give me suggestions as to something that matches this; I don’t think I can wait till September to have a forest scent. Help!
Nectarine Blossom and Honey: I didn’t realize that this was a copy of an already existing scent; if I’d known, I probably would have chosen differently, but oh well! The peach is barely there? Actually, after letting it sit, the fruitiness and freshness are popping up. This is quite pleasant, actually. Inoffensive, but sometimes you don’t want to make a statement, y’know? But it’s faint and fades fast and has a strongly artificial nature to it - like peach shampoo or hand soap. 6/10 A later note: I ended up acquiring Vince Camuto Fiori at Nordstrom Rack for twenty bucks which basically fills this niche for me much more effectively. The CP scent is good but don't waste your time or money.
English Cathedral: This is fascinating. The ivy in this is the most forward to me. No jasmine, but there’s grass, and maybe a little stone? Possibly smoke? Yeah, a little smoke, but barely any. It’s ivy forward and that’s the dominant note. I happen to love ivy, so this is brilliant. It’s less the cathedral itself, and more the church garden, or perhaps a botanical garden with lots of rare plants and greenery. 10/10, would be my favorite if Wild Hunt hadn’t shown up.
Fluffy Green Tea: No. Absolutely not. Get this off my skin. Cleaning products and plastic and weird rotten marshmallow. Ugh. I will try this again after resting it for some time to see if the temperature shock temporarily transformed it into something awful, but if not, 0/10. Edit after resting for two weeks: it did not improve. If anything it’s worse. What the fuck.
Coeur de Vahine: Another dupe, this one of a Sud Pacifique scent by the same name - though it doesn’t say as such on the website. Coconut isn’t even in this and yet it’s what I get. Rose, too, if I squint. And it’s not a natural, yummy coconut either - it’s more of a sun-tan lotion. And after less than half an hour all of that is gone and it's just a sort of skin/velvet musk scent. I've never smelled the original so can't compare, but I'm not super impressed. 4/10
Dark Changeling: This cherry reads more almond to me, which is a pet peeve of mine. I get why it happens, since they’re so closely related, but I’ve definitely smelled cherry scents where it wasn’t just almond extract with extra sugar and some added tartness to cover it up; the scent was unmistakably the fruit itself. I don’t dislike almond; in fact, I love it. I just don’t want to be given almond when I was promised cherry. There’s also a really odd rubbery note underneath. It's like... cherry flavored… adult toys/family planning devices and/or those items combined with cherry flavored lube. That’s what that combo makes me think of. No thank you. I’ll try this again in a few days. See if that weird rubbery note is gone. Edit: It’s still kinda there, but less unpleasant, though I get absolutely none of the other notes. 4/10
Vanilla Bean Noel: Butterscotch. Caramel. Frankly just straight up butter. The vanilla itself is actually pretty secondary to these flavors? I’m not sure I get it at all, in hindsight. I see why the Twist of Lime version is popular, the citrus probably cuts through the “fatty” quality quite nicely. But too rich for me, way too rich, and not a ton of the bean itself. 5/10
Heavenly Vanilla: This is what I thought I’d be getting with VBN. This was my free sample, and I’m pretty pleasantly surprised! It’s rich but the ozone notes give it a buoyancy and lightness that I felt was lacking in VBN, but the orchid and vanilla keep it sweet and silky. I don't usually find myself craving vanilla, but for the occasions I do, I'd FS this without hesitation. 9/10
The ones I would consider FSing are Heavenly Vanilla, English Cathedral, and of course Wild Hunt.
If/when I try CP again, I would go for the following: Twist of Lime Noel/Blackberry Lime Noel, Fairy King, standard Cake on Mondays, Chainsaw Hero, Ivory Eyelet, Paper Butterfly (still on the hunt for that soothing scent for my plushies!), Signature White, and some of the warm-weather exclusives like Tokyo Market, Brazilian Tea, and June Wedding.
My next review will be for Alkemia; I got a boat-load of samples, mostly in the green/forest/atmospheric realm of things, and I did find a scent I liked enough to full-size there - which led to, of course, a second order with more samples, so once I've given everything enough time to rest and tried them all, I'll make a post. Thank you all for reading!

Hey all, here with a roundup of impressions! Many of you already know and love these houses, but maybe some of these are scents you haven’t had a chance to try yet. The number ratings are kinda made up because I haven’t fully made up my mind yet.

Death and Floral

I only ordered roller balls from them. They were all blind buys, though I had already sniff-tested other fragrances of theirs. Overall, I feel like I got good quality for what I paid. The bottles have slightly holographic labels, which is a nice touch! I like the art more than I expected to and wish it were highlighted on the website. The total turnaround time ended up being VERY long–about a month and a half, which lessens my enthusiasm for ordering more. Everything I ordered was from the unlisted catalog, which is probably part of why it took so long.
Crows, Cats, and Vampire Bats: 2.8 / 5

• Notes: Fresh bergamot, rose kush, tonka bean, black patchouli, blended together with a hint of black pepper
• It’s mostly patchouli and unfortunately there’s more of it than I want. Not getting the tonka, and I wish I were getting more of the black pepper. I am getting a good dose of the bergamot though, especially now that the bottle has settled a little. Sharp, tangy, earthy.
• I don’t expect to rebuy this one, but I do wear it.

Night of the Living Basil: 3 / 5

• Notes: Holy basil, cloves, darkened orange spice
• The basil struck me as a grassy note at first; I’m not completely sure I would’ve recognized it as basil if I didn’t know to look for it. But, it IS definitely basil, a nice earthy green. The scent is otherwise pretty one-note. I’m not really getting the spices. I’m enjoying this one though! I mostly wear it on its own, but I like layering it with Crows, Cats, and Vampire Bats or Pacifica’s Tsucan Blood Orange.
• Not sure if I’d re-buy this one or not. It’s gonna last me a while at any rate.

Scream Ferociously: 3.7 / 5

• Notes: Orange blossoms and fierce summer lemonade, blended with green leaves and black tea
• It pulls very lemon but an almost musty, slightly sweet lemon. I like it better the more I smell it. I also love the art–it features a roaring lion, which is honestly more fearsome than what this scent is actually giving but is aesthetically pleasing and adds to the overall summery vibe I’m getting from this.
• I’d consider buying this one again.

A Ceiling Made of Stars (Scent of the Month February 2024): 3.4 / 5

• Notes: Pink Saffron blended with blackberries & spiced black amber
• This was the freebie that came with my order. It’s warm and sweet but not cloying. The berry comes through in an artificial way, like a pink Hi-Chew, which I find pleasantly nostalgic. I think this would be a nightmare as a body spray, but I’m enjoying it more than I expected to as an oil.
• I’d consider buying this one again.

Nui Cobalt Designs

All of these were small samples I picked up on the IMAM Sunday Swap. Based on these, I would definitely try Nui Cobalt again in the future, but I wouldn’t feel safe blind buying from them.
Leo: 3.8 / 5

• Notes: Honey bourbon, heliotrope, golden copal, galangal, yellow mandarin, and maple wood.
• The boozy honey comes through very strongly. A good scent for napping in the sun.
• I would strongly consider buying this one again if it weren’t sold out. I’ll be keeping my eye out for honey bourbon scents from them in the future!

Gryphon: 4 / 5

• Notes: fresh ginger, hinoki, and white grapefruit, a glowing heart of sandalwood incense, saffron, and hay, with a base of bronze musk, sun-warmed suede, and rich benzoin.
• Opens very woody then quickly shifts to tangy and a little bit sweet–I think that’s the grapefruit.
• I would consider buying this one again, but it’s sold out. However, this at least tells me that I like NCD’s version of these notes!

The Mouse King: 3.5 / 5

• Notes: The tang of wild opopanax, a snap of rhubarb, freshly grated ginger, dusty brown suede, dark guaiac wood, labdanum, and savage musk.
• I was most excited to try this one! It doesn’t make me picture a savage, antagonistic Nutcracker mouse but instead a cute, brave Redwall mouse. It opens powdery and tangy with an oddly nostalgic note that reminds me of fake makeup products I had as a kid. Then it shifts to an earthy-clean musk but gets sharper and greener as it dries. I’m really curious to try layering it with something fruity.
• I’m not sure if I’d rebuy this one again or not!

Clockwork Dolls: 1.5 / 5

• Notes: Top notes of yellow mandarin and fresh rosemary, a heart of sandalwood incense, and a base of bronze musk, black amber, and Sumatran benzoin.
• This one didn’t smell like any of the notes to me, but it definitely feels like part of a Christmas collection ( it is). It gave me pure molasses cookie, almost exactly like Imaginary Authors’ A Whiff of Wafflecone. Too sweet for me! And it ENDURED. My sleeve where it touched my wrist still smelled like it over 24 hours later. I emailed NCD for their thoughts on which note it was so that I can try to avoid it in the future, and they confirmed it was probably their black amber and maybe the benzoin, maybe the perfect storm of the two combined. I’m bummed I didn’t get any of the rosemary note.
• Gifted to a friend!

Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab

These were also samples from the IMAM Sunday Swap. This was an odd mix, and I didn’t get anything I think I’m likely to repurchase. I’d give BPAL another chance because I didn’t get to try any of their dark, fruity scents, which originally attracted me to them, but I would not blind buy and I’d think it over carefully first.
Aperotos Eros: 1.5 / 5

• Notes: Unloving love: benzoin, Indian musk, massoia bark, myrrh, ambrette seed, galbanum, bergamot, and fir.
• I think most of what I’m smelling here is the Indian musk and myrrh, because it smells exactly like a tarot-and-incense shop. Not bad but not a standout. For me, this is not wearable by itself but could be nice with something citrusy. This one is also quite dark and has the potential to stain clothing! And it’s tenacious! Even a tiny amount held onto my skin for many hours.
• Swapped away!

Medea: 2.5 / 5

• Notes: Night-blooming cereus, black orchid, black currant and myrtle leaf enshrouded in the incense of Hecate’s cypress and myrrh, and the dark rage of magickal labdanum and intoxicating poppy.
• This one was a journey and changed a lot as I wore it. It’s cypress forward and the first impression from the bottle is sharp. On my skin, it mellowed considerably, becoming fresh and almost powdery. Then it took a turn toward Pinesol (RIP) and then another turn toward soap (RIP again), finally settling somewhere more softly evergreen-fresh but wearable. It ultimately wasn’t for me.
• Swapped away!

Namaste: 2.5 / 5

• Notes: Sandalwood, jasmine, rose, patchouli, cedarwood and lemongrass.
• Like Medea, Namaste was a journey. It’s lemongrass dominant, and that was all I got at first. As it dried, it became subtly more floral with a slight but not unpleasant funk to it. Unfortunately. This one also spent a little time in cleaning solvent land but dried down to a very faint lemongrass. I might give it another chance, but I think it's just too much lemongrass for me.
• Not planning to rebuy.

Ultraviolet: 1 / 5

• Notes: eucalyptus, mint, neroli, violet
• It’s been discontinued, and I can see why: it’s pure dentist’s office. I wonder if some sweetness would fix it or make it worse.
• Can’t rebuy since it’s discontinued, but I wouldn’t anyway.

Brusque Violet: 2 / 5

• Notes: Violet petal, violet leaf, osmanthus, orris, mint, and opoponax.
• She is brusque! A sharp, powdery floral. I don’t think violet is for me.
• Not rebuying.

​

Fantome

This is my favorite indie house I’ve tried so far. Beautiful presentation! I blind bought several rollerballs and some samples, plus one rollerball I’d previously sniff-tested and loved. Unfortunately, everything I’ve tried has been solid and now I want to buy even more from them! Help! I would feel pretty confident blind-buying a lot of their blends–and I intend to, haha. I really want Lorelei, and I’m also considering Vasilissa, Marya Morevna, Kensington, and Faun. If you’ve tried any of those, let me know what you thought! The TAT has consistently been about a month, as advertised on their website. I wish it were faster, but it’s been worth the wait. Plus it’s queer woman-owned, ugh, my heart!
Olwyn: 4 / 5

• Notes: Magnolias, white lilies, night-blooming jasmine, and gardenias over rich, buttery vanilla, myrrh, benzoin, and a hint of orange blossom
• A heady mix of white florals that dries down creamy and slightly sweet. I blind bought this and it was exactly what I expected. I only wish it lasted longer, but so it goes with oil rollers. It has pretty good throw while it lasts, though.
• Would definitely rebuy.

Kinmokusei: 3.6 / 5

• Notes: Golden osmanthus in its full complexity—golden blossoms tinged with citrus, ripe apricot, juicy peach, tree sap, and deep, resinous amber.
• This was a free sample with one of my orders. It’s sweet, juicy, and bright. It has slightly better projection and duration than Olwyn but dries down to a plasticy orange.
• I would consider buying a full roller ball, but there are other things I want more.

Baba Yaga: 2.9 / 5

• Notes: Black and red musk, a smoldering cauldron, cracked bone, cardamom, warm wood, hanging animal skins, burning mugwort.
• I sniff tested this one once and liked it enough to buy a sample but not enough to commit to a roller ball. It’s not the kind of thing I’d use often, but I do like it. It reminds me of an incense shop, but the herbal notes and musk keep it from feeling too hippie to me.
• I don’t think I’d size up in this, but I’m glad to have a teeny bit of it for every now and then!

Lycanthrope: 3.7 / 5

• Notes: Spicy tomato leaf, dark honey, and oakmoss, with hints of peach, lychee, ivy, vanilla, and tomatoes fresh from the vine.
• This was my entry into Fantome! I sniff-tested this once, and liked it enough to buy a roller ball. It's sweeter than I remembered. The opening is very bright and reminds me of what I like most about Imaginary Authors The Soft Lawn. (Has it secretly been the oak moss and not the linden I’ve loved all along?) It becomes mossier and more tomato viney as it dries down. Not terribly long-lasting, but enjoyable! Not quite green or fruity. Almost powdery but not exactly? This one is hard for me to pin down.
• I’d consider rebuying.

Surem: 3 / 5

• Notes: Honeysuckle, cedar, labdanum, myrrh, creosote bush, white musk, and tobacco
• The floral opening isn't unpleasant, but it's fiercer than I expected for spring in the desert, speaking as someone who lived in the rural southwest for more than half of my life. As it dries down, it mellows into a sunbaked quality that evokes the desert more accurately for me. The ceder pops in and out for me, and the creosote is strongest in the drydown.
• Not sure I’d buy it again, but I’ll enjoy wearing it while I have it!

Tatami: 2.8 / 5

• Notes: Tatami (rice straw mats), warmed in the sun, with soothing temple incense.
• I bought a sample of this. I haven’t tried it on my skin yet, so I can only report on first impressions. It does smell like dry sun-warmed grass with a touch of incense!
• Unless it wears amazing on my skin, I don’t think this is something I need to size up in. But it’s pleasant and I’m glad to have a chance to try it!

Duende: 3 / 5

• Notes: oakmoss, cedar, fir, resinous labdanum, benzoin, tree sap, wild violets, and lilac
• I’ve been curious about this one, so I was happy to get it as a bonus sample with my order! I expected it to be sharp, but the iris balances it really nicely. I haven’t tried it on my skin yet, but I’m feeling hopeful I’ll like it more than I was afraid I would.
• I’m not sure yet if I’d buy it or not!

Bune: 4 / 5

• Notes: Damp subterranean air, nagarmotha, smooth cave walls, davana, a cold marble altar, & glittering green dragon scales
• WTF I love this??! This was another random sample, one I never would’ve chosen for myself, but it was a sleeper hit. It makes me feel not like the fragrance is evaporating off me but like I’m evaporating because I’m a fae creature made of delicious cool mist. I want to layer this with so many things!
• I absolutely want this! I’ve mostly been sticking to Fantome’s oil rollers, but I really want an atomizer for this one.

Thanks for reading along and I hope you enjoyed!

All other parts accessible here
All setlists are being compiled here for easy viewing; DM/email me or leave a comment if you want to help out!
In case anyone's looking to expand their electronic catalog via tracks that AT has played live, here are some you might have missed that have been IDed since the end of the summer 2023 gig season. Many thanks to anyone on Reddit, YouTube, etc. including u/PfhorTheWin, u/unknwon_Prior5244, and a few people in my emails who are helping to fill in the missing blanks.
This round:
Busta Rhymes - Light Your Ass On Fire (Instrumental) (Big Day Out '04)
Crash Course In Science - Flying Turns (Big Day Out '04)
BFC - Galaxy (Big Day Out '04)
Aphex Twin - Arp 2500 - Modules 1004 P,1004 T,1016 [Brain Floss Mix] (Melt! '06)
DZ's Pump Girls - Pump It Up (ATP Nightmare '07)
Mundo Muzique - Welcome (Primavera '09)
Unique 3 - Rude 'Bout The Place (Primavera '09)
KAVARI - Luminescence (Bleed Mix) (Best Kept Secret '23)
Aquestion - おいアホ(GoldenEggs kick edit) (Best Kept Secret '23)
DJ SMILEY BOBBY - Drum Exercise For Sound System (90-110 bpm mix) (Villafranca '23)
Also of note: the ID currently known as "09PRIpercussion-beat" was found, unidentified, in a mix by O/V/R (Regis & James Ruskin) mix from 2005.

To wrap up my reviews of Andromeda’s Curse, I have to skip forward a little in time, but I wanted to keep the reviews for the house all together (see here for Part I). Many months and many perfume houses after I first tried Andromeda’s Curse, I placed a second order, despite the low success rate of my first purchase, because it was Black Friday, and at $9 for 5 samples shipped I had nothing to lose.
Tea Ceremony (Matcha Green Tea, Wisteria, Tonka Bean, Amber): Perfumey, for sure, but in a bright, springy fashion that is pretty lovely in a traditional way. The matcha brings a green edge that manages to stay light instead of turning the perfume too sharp. I will use up this sample.
Disconnected (Peach Blossom, Vanilla Bean, Silky Sandalwood, Fuzzy Peach Skin, Caramel, Agarwood, and a Smidge of Misanthropy): Funny enough, this reminds me of how I remember Forest Maiden smelling at first, but not how Forest Maiden actually smells to me now. The floral elements are subtle and the caramel dominates. I’m disappointed that I can’t smell the fuzzy peach skin. Keeping the sample, but wouldn’t repurchase.
Full Moon Rising (Orange, Marshmallows, White Chocolate, Vanilla): This is heavy on the white chocolate, and I find that I would have preferred a lighter, creamier version, where the vanilla and marshmallow lift the orange. A pleasant enough chocolate orange, but weighty. Keeping the sample, but wouldn’t repurchase and am now in the market for a light, dreamy orange creamsicle scent.
Alice Moving Under Skies (Honey, Tea, Water Lily, Cedarwood, Vanilla): I one hundred percent feel like I just sniffed a random perfume insert in a catalog. It’s a generic perfume smell, which isn’t necessarily bad, it just means that it’s sweet and floral and I can’t put my finger on any of the notes. I selected this sample because by this time I had learned that honey often goes bad on me, and this was such a low-risk way to try it again. It didn’t go funky, thankfully. Keeping the sample, but wouldn't repurchase.
Solanum (Tomato Leaf, Wild Mint, Blackberries, Galbanum, Oakmoss): This went to turpentine on me. No richness at all from the blackberries, this is all sharp edges. Far from the garden medley I was hoping for. Destash.
Baby Bat (Clove, Marshmallow, Vanilla, Caramel, and Cedarwood): This was my free sample, and to me it smells like sweet bubble gum and incense. I suppose it’s the clove and cedar combination that my nose is translating into incense, since there’s no incense in this. It smells like a tween girl walking into a metaphysical bookstore. Nostalgic, but not what I want to smell like at this time. Destash even though I don’t hate it.
Lessons learned: I’m ready at this point to accept that Andromeda’s Curse perfumes are not my style, as much as I want them to be because of how darn affordable they are. With this second batch, I had a better sense of scents I like, and their interpretation of those scents did not excite me. They leaned heavier, sharper, and more perfumey than my preferences. However, I am not mad that I started my journey here because I was able to learn a lot about my likes and dislikes at very low cost. Plus, their shipping is pretty fast (TAT 9 days and 15 days, from order to mailbox), which prevented me from placing too many other orders before I learned some crucial information about my tastes.
Up next: Solstice Scents.

Helllloooo everyone! I just tested a batch of BPAL samples I got from a Sunday destash. I review and catalog everything I get so here we go. This is my FIRST experience with BPAL after asking about them here. I was so overwhelmed so I let them pick and so here’s my reviews!
As a reminder, here are my tags:
Brush Off The Cat — scents for attracting fine men, dates, things of that nature
Work from home — working from home!
She’s Out The House — Good scents for meeting people — give a friendly, interesting, attention-grabbing vibe
Everyday - simple everyday errand scents
Hobbies — scents for ceramics, oil painting classes, whatever
————
Alice — Milk and honey with rose, carnation and bergamot.
This one is interesting! That rose and carnation is tough but the milk, money and bergamot is so nice. It might be a tad too powdeflowery/ but I can’t tell.
I think I’m gonna keep it but might destash later. I might need to do a wear test. Hmmmm
—————
Bewitched - blackberry, sage, green tea, wild berries and dark musk.
It’s giving woodsy princess. Very twilight. It’s giving suck my blood IDK I like it — it’s kind of sexy in a smut about bearded lumberjack way. I’m curious if it’s something I’ll wear but I do like it. It’s really dramatic
Tags: she’s out the house, brush off the cat maybe? I might destash, still deciding.
—————
Morocco - Arabian spices wind through a blend of warm musk, carnation, red sandalwood and cassia.
This is HEAVY. Very hardcore scent. I think this would nice for a room spray but not to wear.
Destash
————
Honeyed Pear Tart — this is has a sweet sourness that almost smells like nail polish? I find that pears often smell like that in perfume. So out the bottle it’s not good but when it’s on it mellows quite a bit to kind of like a hot girl smell that’s fruity and skin-like. This was a surprise and proof I need to always test on skin cause this was gonna be a destash! I do think I need to do a wear test.
Tags: brush off the cat, she’s out the house, work from homes
Keep, no full-size
——
Sin - Thouroughly corrupted: amber, sandalwood, black patchouli and cinnamon.
I’m just not this type of girl. I want to be kind of a spicy baddie and I thought I was but I’m not. Like whoever can wear this is SUCH A BADDIE like I wonder if this is how Angelina Jolie smells. It’s sharp and confrontational. Very much — I WILL MAKE YOU CRY.
Destash
— Cockaigne - milk and honey, sweet cakes and wine.
Oh yeahhh I love this. The wine makes this kind of naughty. Very late night making out after a good date at a wine bar. This is surprising and sexy and I like it a lot. Perfect date perfume.
Tags: brush off the cat, she’s out the house
Keeping, would full size I think? If I saw in a destash
——
Elf - Pale golden musk, honeycomb, amber, parma violet, hawthorne bark, aspen leaf, forest lily, life everlasting, white moss, and a hint of wild berry.
It is giving big Legolas energy and I think I like it??! I never thought I was a woodsy scent gal but I find that I like this. I’m curious if I’ll ever reach for it to wear but it’s opening my eyes a bit.
Tags: Hobbies, work from home
Keeping!
———
Against Idleness and Mischief - Pollen-dusted honey, diligent tonka, steadfast chamomile, and goodly hyssop.
I like this! Very light and airy. It’s giving spring time! Just enough florals without being overwhelming. I don’t actually know what those other things are but it works. I like it.
Keeping!
Tags: hobbies, work from home, she’s out the house
———— Penitence- blend of pure, pious frankincense and graceful myrrh.
I don’t even know what to say about this one!!!!!
Destash
——
Jezebel - . A gloriously decadent blend of honey, roses, orange blossom and sandalwood.
This is really good. I love the orange blossom and honey mix and the rose isn’t too overwhelming. Again — very sexy. This is the house of baddies.
Very balanced and “grown up” scent.
Keeping!
Tags: she’s out the house
————
Overall thoughts: there are for sure some winners here but I’ve realized that I don’t like the dark spice scents like I thought so overall a lot of the smells were just not for me. This was a curated pack and I feel like I’ve opened myself up more to more woodsy scents and my love of the honey note is still around. I think I might get some more samples that are lighter and see what I think. None of these had tea notes either which I’ve been told I would like so to be continued BPAL. TO BE CONTINUED.
My favorite was cockaigne! Also I think one of them gave me a small skin allergic reaction not sure which so I’ll be careful

I hadn't seen one up yet and I'm finally free to couch tour tonight so I thought what the heck! Here's your setlist thread for Billy Strings in Atlanta tonight, live from State Farm Arena. The show is free to stream on Nugs for subscribers with video, and *I believe* free for all to audio stream with just a Nugs login.
Doors: 6:30 EST
Show: 7:30 EST
Show Poster: Matt Leunig
Official Stream: Nugs.net Audio
Setlist Resources: BillyBase, bmfsdb
Preshow Jams:
Kitchen Dwellers new record Seven Devils
Jerry Garcia Band - Capitol Theatre 03/01/1980
Preshow Mix on Twitch
Billy Strings 11/17/2023 Manchester Academy
SET ONE [8:09 PM EST - 9:18 PM EST]
Hollow Heart >
Blackberry Blossom (Traditional) 61 Show Gap
Must Be Seven (!!!) >
Secrets
Hellbender
I'll Remember You Love In My Prayers (Will S. Hays) >
On The Line >
Train 45
The Baggage Coach Ahead (for Billy's mom) 201 Show Gap
New Camptown Races (Frank Wakefield) >
Unwanted Love (Reno & Smiley and The Gang)
My Alice
Escanaba
John Deere Tractor (Larry Sparks)
Dig A Little Deeper In The Well (Oak Ridge Boys) (!!!)
SET TWO [9:42 PM EST - 10:52 PM EST]
Let The Cocaine Be (Billy Solo) 92 Show Gap
I Told Them All About You (Billy Solo) 83 Show Gap
Country Blues (Billy Solo, clawhammer banjo)
Dos Banjos (Dos Billys)
Running The Route (Full Band) >
So Many Miles% (BMFF Lead Vocals) (!!!) >
Dealing Despair
Love & Regret
Black Clouds% (String Cheese Incident)
My Little Georgia Rose (Bill Monroe) 95 Show Gap
ENCORE
Standing In The Need Of Prayer (Around the Can)
Richard Petty (Around the Can)
% Jessica by Allman Brothers Band tease
CHECK INS:
Philadelphia PA, Augusta GA, Nashville, BFE Indiana, NOLA, Carolina, Train > 106, Walkin' into State Farm, PIT, Holualoa Big Island, 107, Windsor Ontario Canada, OKC, Medford NJ, Belle Haven VA, Beagle Barn, Cary, Tuxedo NC, Couch in Detroit, Lafayette Indiana, Indy, KC KS, Lutherville MD, Ohio, Texas, Hancock NY, Atlanta 40 weeker, Billadelphia, Twin Cities MN, Springfield DOH, Franklin TN, Breckenridge CO, 119, Lexington KY, Oxford MS, Columbus OH, Austin TX, Georgia Natural Gas Greener Life® Loft Suites, Conifer CO, Mobile AL, Cuse, Maine, San Diego CA, Colorado Springs CO, Chicago Burbs, Traverse City, Starkville MS, St Paul, Mamaroneck NY, Idaho, nola, Central KY, Southwest Chicago Burbs, Pittsburgh, Winston Salem, Western KY, Asheville, State Farm, West Texas, Nashville, Western Kentucky, Row C, New Jersey, St. Paul, Dayton OH, Richmond VA, Floor Alex Side

Greetings,

My Bath & Body Restock is live; I restocked the soaps, scrubs, and General Catalog Wax. My Spring Wax release will be sometime in March. You may notice that I had to raise the prices of the soaps. During the break, I recosted all my soaps and with the current price of olive oil, it had to be done. (Oh, except for Salt Bars – those are the same!) Coconut oil-free soap, which I am planning on making more of, is quite pricey as my substitute oil (Babassu) is big bucks. I don’t use ANY palm oil in my handmade soaps – another (cheaper) substitute for coconut – because orangutans.
Wax is staying the same price for 2024, so that’s good news! Shipping has increased significantly in the past year, but I’m not raising that immediately – let’s see if it comes down a bit. You can always use the code FREESHIPPING for orders over 50.00. One last little update: I still have to pour the wax, so in a way, this update is half “pre-order.” So, orders with wax may take a tad longer to ship, but I wanted to have more “offerings” for this restock. I have packing help for this restock so I’m confident that my Tat will still be about 14 Biz days. Thanks!!!

February Soaps:

Salt Bars: (All Palm Oil Free)

• Basket Case
• #13 Baby
• Salted Pamplemousse
• (new!) Elderberry Faerie

Cold-Process: (All Palm Oil Free)

Goldi~Oats - Oatmeal, Honey, Cream, Vanilla, and Sugared Strawberry
Ley Line - An energetic walk through the English countryside...Lemon, English Ivy, Jasmine, Green Apple, Neroli, and Mossy Country Paths Overgrown with Ferns
Pie Bavard - Woody Vetiver, Fresh Bergamot, Lemon Peel, Cedar, and Warm Amber
In the Winter Garden - A dilapidated, wrought-iron Victorian Winter Garden filled with scents of Vetiver, Tender Seedlings, Hot House Cucumbers on Overgrown Vines, Potted Geraniums, Light Herbs, Mossy Pathways, Broken Glass, and Damp Wood
Goats in the Herb Garden - Essential Oil/Goat Milk Soap scented with a super fresh, herbaceous blend of Eucalyptus, Atlas Cedar, and Rosemary Essential Oils (Contains Goat Milk – Not Vegan)

Cold-Process – Coconut Oil & Palm Oil Free:

Cascadia - Coco~Free - Woody Western Redcedar, Vanilla, Patchouli, Bergamot, Rose, and Jasmine
Blackberry & Buttermilk - Coco~Free - Fresh Buttermilk, Blackberries, Vanilla, and Whipped Cream

February Sugaree Scrubs:

Black Tea & Biscotti - Strong Black Earl Grey Tea, a Twist of Lemon, Crunchy Almond Biscotti, Warm Amber and a Smidge of Musk
Lattemiele Vanille - Thick & Creamy Oat Milk Infused with Vanilla Beans, Caramelized Brown Sugar, and a Single Drop of Orange Blossom Honey
Burlesque - White Chocolate, Cocoa, Dry Vermouth, Crushed Nutmeg, Vanilla Cremeaux, Saigon Cinnamon, and the faintest Kiss of Luxardo Cherry
Slutty Peach - Sweet Juicy Peaches Gettin’ a Little Slutty with Blood Orange, Rum, Patchouli, Sandalwood, a Whisp of Cardamom, and some Vanilla Tonka
Pink Pony Party - A Pink Party of Rose Absolute, Ripe Raspberry, Strawberry Leaf, Blood Orange, Pink Lady Apples, Blushing Nectarine, Light Musks, Woody Vetiver, and Spicy Cumin

Cone Incense:

Some are still in stock – I’ll be restocking this in March.

General Catalog Wax is Available for order.

> My current TAT is about 14 business days.
Please follow me on Instagram (@athame_and_alchemy) to keep abreast of changes to my turn-around time and other shop news.
> I am offering FREE SHIPPING in the US if your order is over $50.00. You can use the code: FREESHIPPING to apply it when you checkout on the website. This code never expires.
Thank you SO much for supporting my small business,
Kimberly Capron Gonzalez
https://www.athameandalchemy.com

I totally forgot about this but I got a bunch of samples after party and it was a real mixed bag! guess this is good because I have a solid sense of what to avoid and what I like. These aren’t reviews really? I’m just talking about them!
You all describe and talk about the fragrances so beautifully. I do not but im trying my best! This is just what my nose likes and dislikes!
First date by Pulp - glassy cherry orange lip gloss a sprinkle of cocoa powder over a vanilla milkshake and a hint of softly sweet clean skin musk
It smells like a tootsie roll on the floor of the skating rink so it’s not for meeeee — that cocoa powder is brutal. This is my first ever Pulp scent! I will avoid cocoa powder in the future because my reaction was strong and unhappy.
The widow in white by Pulp - Meyer lemon, white grapefruit, orange blossom, sandalwood and vanilla
It’s giving really clean bathroom at a high-end restaurant after someone was murdered but idk I kind of like it? I don’t know if I would reach for it? Hahaa
Overall thoughts on pump — I think I need to try more because this wasn’t my best impression but I suspect there’s some good stuff.
86 Bedford street by Hexennacht - cherry pipe tobacco, rum-dipped cigars, golden amber, leather banquettes, book cover-lines teakwood shelves, bourbon, honey drizzled crossiants, chocolate whisky, pipe smoke, freshly brewed coffee, smeared ink, jauntily draped cashmere shawls
I mean i wouldn’t wear it but it’s fun? Hahaa it smells like the inside of s Sherlock Holmes mystery? Maybe this would be a good candle but I couldn’t imagine wearing it but honestly the idea of a hot man wearing this had me daydreaming for 15 minutes and maybe inspired a new character so in that way!!!! Cool??? I would love to know if y’all wear scents like this!
A clockwork orange by hexenncht Vanilla spun sugar and orange blossom jammiwammed with every orange blend in me flat back
I think I like this! When I smelled it at first I was like nooo sir it’s giving pinsol orange but when I have it on and it’s settling I feel like it’s kind of nice and moody. I might have to try it for a day.
Babooshka by hexenncht
Slow-baked sweet gourds, Russian tea cookies, pipe tobacco, Autumnal spice accord, caramel, nutmeg, honey, coumarin, beeswax absolute, cardamom sugar, crushed apples, black pepper, liatrix absolute.
It’s giving romantic comedy set in a small town that does civil war re-enactments in the time right before thanksgiving!!!! I like it! I feel like this is giving mostly apple pie! Im not like súper into smelling like a cookie because sometimes it feels a little young and I really like the confidence scents can give you but I feel like yeah you smell like a pie but an ADULT PIE
Overall I feel like this house would be really awesome for like room sprays or candles but I’m still trying to decide if I would wear them? I’m gonna ask this in other thread but figuring out what your scent style is but there something I was thinking about a lot.
Blackest Lily - Black hearted tart
Lily of the valley, night blooming moonflower vines, and sugared violets create a sweet, slightly spicy, floral heart. Cassis accord made with a combination of blackberry and black currant notes add a sultry sophistication. Blackest Lily is a dark floral gourmand perfect for steamy summer nights!
She’s a baddieeeee. It’s giving date that ends in a happy ending for everyone! This is really sexy! I’m usual not into super floral scents but this is really light and sexy! Perfect for a date and very sultry and fun. I’ve tried some other sexy scents but this one puts out for sure. I’ll reach for this if I ever decide to dust off the cat one of these days!!!
Starry Eyes by Black hearted tart
Golden vanilla and light woods create a luxurious cashmere throw accord. Sweet lavender wafts softly from a candle on the night stand. A hot mug of steamed milk with a dash of nutmeg finish the soothing scent profile.
She might be a black hearted tart girly I fear!!!!! I love this house and this is great!! It’s giving spa day!!!! It’s giving relaxation! Perfect mix of sweet without being super overpowering!
Brighter than sunshine by black hearted tart
Brighter Than Sunshine opens with the scent of mouth watering lemon bars and enticing notes of gooey lemon curd, buttery shortbread crust, and sprinkles of powdered sugar. Orange blossoms blended with mandarin and wild honey add a soft floral element. Sun brewed sweet tea accord adds a refreshing spritz of herbaceous freshness to this sunshiny blend. Sweet amber and golden vanilla create the base.
Fun fact — I got this because of the photo used to promote it! I’m still deciding on this! Sometimes I smell it and it’s too sweet and other times I’m like oooh this is great. I might need to wear it and see how it plays but I love the complexity and I LOVE A TEA NOTE even though none of these have tea really??? Idk what I was thinking
Overall thoughts on the house: like I mentioned before, I’m a black hearted tart girlie!! I really like every smell I get from them and they have provided some of my favorite scents in my indie journey so far! There’s a lightness and openness to their scents that I really respond to!
Venusian Musk by strange fire and fumery
Night-blooming jasmine, Egyptian red musk, white amber, pumpkin, lavender, sandalwood
Very classic perfume but still very nice but not really my style!
Phew! That’s it! I enjoyed doing this because it helps me build up my little catalog for myself!
My favorites from this batch: starry eyes and blackest lily! I also just think baboushka is one I can’t stop thinking about!
What should I try next?

Imbolc:

Welcome to the latest sabbat informational post! Throughout the year, we will be posting up these threads to share general information about the next upcoming sabbat so WvP's witches, new and old, can prepare for the holiday. These posts will contain basic information about the holiday and open up the floor for further questions or discussion.
For our Southern Hemisphere witches, the next holiday is Lughnasadh / Lammas, a celebration of the Irish god Lugh and the beginning of the harvest festival, and its celebrations traditionally fall on August 1st. For more information, check out our earlier Lughnasadh post!

🔥🕯️ February 1st: Imbolc + New Moon & Lunar New Year! 🌚🎆

What and When is Imbolc?

Imbolc is one of the eight sabbats of the modern pagan Wheel of the Year. It is a celebration of the Irish goddess Brigid, and one of the "greater sabbats", falling approximately halfway between an equinox and a solstice, which correspond to the early Gaelic Fire Festivals. The others are Beltane (mid-Spring), Lughnasadh (mid-Summer), and Samhain (mid-Autumn).
In the northern hemisphere, Imbolc traditionally falls on February 1st. However, it's also a somewhat variable holiday. To follow old Celtic traditions, you could start on the 31st of January. Witches who prefer to take a more celestial point of view often celebrate it on the direct mid-point between the Winter Solstice and the Spring Equinox, which is usually the 3rd or 4th of February. From a more nature-based perspective, Imbolc can be seen as the start of spring and may be marked by certain natural phenomena, such as the blooming of blackthorn or snowdrops.

New Moon & Lunar New Year

The New Moon falls 9 February this year. You can find out what time the moon will be at its 'newest' in your location by using a moon app or online here.
New Moons are a great time to set new intentions or do other change-related witchy tasks. Do you have anything planned for this upcoming New Moon? Feel free to chat about it in this thread in addition to Imbolc/Lunasa-related shenanigans!

Imbolc: History, Connections, and Modern Practice

Imbolc is an old Gaelic fire festival that traditionally heralded the beginning of spring. It has a few other alternate spellings (eg., Imbolg) and names (eg., Oimelc), but all refer to newly born lambs, with lambing season usually falling late winter.
As a celebration of the earliest parts of spring, Imbolc brought hope to everyday people that the worst of winter's wrath was over. The earliest spring plants were beginning to bud, and weather divination became common as people looked ahead towards planting their crops. This may have been the inspiration behind American Groundhog Day! Fire and purification are important aspects of Imbolc, complete with spring cleaning. Hearth fires were generally more common than bonfires.
The holiday is very strongly associated with the Irish goddess Brigid (also spelled Bríd), a member of the Tuatha Dé Danann and arguably one of the most famous of Ireland's goddesses, associated with the hearth, healing, poetry, and blacksmithing. (Indeed, Brigid was so popular in newly Christian Ireland that she was syncretized with St. Brigid of Kildare, whose feast day is also February 1st.) Houses would honour Brigid by cleaning their home for her and cooking special meals and leaving portions for her as offerings. Some would invoke her for divination, visit holy wells, or make Brigid's crosses. Later Christians would celebrate Candlemas, which also incorporates some elements of Imbolc and Brigid worship as well as Lupercalia.
Check out our section below for some more specific ideas and examples of ways to celebrate Imbolc with yourself, or maybe even a few (properly distanced) family or friends.
As a part of the Wheel of the Year, Imbolc follows Yule, and the worst of the winter is over. The earliest signs of the spring are starting to pop up, burgeoning hope for the months ahead. Soon, nature will be filled with the fertility and growth of spring, and it's time to prepare.
If you look at the sabbats as a reflection of the self, Imbolc is a time to cleanse and prepare for new growth on the horizon. Breathe, reflect, and prepare yourself for the warmth, sun, and renewal that is coming.
Symbols: Fire, Candles, Besoms/Brooms, Lambs, Brigid's Crosses, White Flowers Colours: White, Yellow, Red, Green, Purple, Silver Plants/Herbs: Snowdrop, Violet, Bay Laurel, Blackberry, Rowan, Early Spring Flowers Foods: Milk/Dairy, Seeds, Breads, Winter Preserves

Simple rituals and ways to celebrate Imbolc include:

• Clean your home! Spring cleaning is 100% in the spirit of Imbolc. Brigid likes a tidy house. If you haven't yet, Imbolc is also the perfect time to set/maintain yearly household protection rituals. Here is one example of an Imbolc-specific house cleansing ritual, but there are many others. For more inspiration, look into local and/or polytheist traditions as well. After all of that work, clean yourself with a nice ritual bath.
• Cleanse your spiritual spaces as well! Give some extra attention to your altars, shrines, and magickal workspaces. Scratch off those wax drippings, brush up that leftover familiar fur, and banish the dust. Add some seasonal Imbolc flair to your altar as well if it suits you.
• Make a Brigid's Cross; this simple diagram will show you the basic steps, or go here for a details tutorial. Traditional materials include rushes and willow, but many long pliable materials will serve.
• Create a Brideóg, aka a Bridey Doll or a Brigid Doll. Traditionally, these were crafted of rushes or straw the same as the crosses, but they can also be made of many other craft materials just like any other doll, so feel free to unleash your inner art witch! This page has a guide for making a simple one, and a link to a video tutorial as well. You can also make a bed for the doll near your hearth and leave an offering to invite Brigid into your home.
• Craft an Imbolc Rowan Cross Charm.
• Light a hearthfire if you can, or pull out the candles for an Imbolc candle ritual. Try and incorporate some form of fire into your rituals, if possible.
• Perform an Imbolc seasonal rite/ritual. Here is a good example of a solitary Imbolc ritual, for practising witches without a coven.
• Cook some Imbolc-inspired goodies to unleash your inner Kitchen Witch! Here and here here are two no-nonsense websites with Imbolc related recipes for you to enjoy!
• Celebrate by eating and cooking with seasonal produce.

Tips for New and/or Broom Closet Witches

After the dark and cold of winter, everyone should be looking forward to spring, no matter your religious inclinations. Take this time to focus on nature and make yourself aware of the changes in your surroundings. What are your local traditional "Welcome to Spring!" plants? (Here, it's the daffodils!) Are your trees starting to bud? Showing an interest in nature and the new signs of spring are very healthy and safe ways to celebrate the spirit of Imbolc.
Spring cleaning is also something that everyone can enjoy. With the days getting longer and the sun staying out later, it's a bit easier to get the energy and excitement needed to do some serious cleaning. It's good for you, it's good for your house, it's good for the gods/spirits/energies. Win-win! Don't forget to also cleanse yourself and your space; you're very important too!
Some of the common Imbolc symbols, like Brigid's Crosses, may be acceptable to make and display in Christian homes. If your family is Catholic, you might choose to show special honour to St. Brigid, or other Christian sects can whip out the candles for Candlemas. Otherwise, flowers and lambs are both pretty non-denominational spring symbols, and lambs also get a pass for their connection to March and the upcoming Easter.
Much of the importance of the Wheel of the Year is to really incorporate yourself with nature and the earth's yearly cycles. For most of the temperate, northern part of the world, spring is just starting, and it's time to prepare for the growing season. If you'd like to grow some of your own plants or herbs, now is the perfect time to prep by making sure your planting timelines are in order and that you have everything you need. If you can, take the time to appreciate the renewal of growth in the plants and animals in your local area. Chances are, they're gearing up for a productive spring, just like the rest of us.
Feel free to ask any questions you might have below or otherwise use this post for discussion about Imbolc (northern witches) or Lughnasadh (southern witches)!
Special thanks to Einmariya for research, content, & dedication to holidays. 💗🕯️

Thinking back on my 15 year relationship (not separated 1 year) and only learned about codependency as the relationship was ending. I'm just getting into my healing journey, and attempting to catalog all of the ways this condition impacted my relationship.
For context, she was diagnosed bipolar, though I suspected there were other conditions at play. It was 15 years of walking on eggshells and managing extreme volatile emotions, while holding down a full time job, house work and raising three kids.
I was reading another post and was reminded of a peculiar facet of our dynamic. For most of the time she'd be in her usual rut, and I'd constantly be looking for ways to pull her out. Motivate her. Incite action and health. Whatever I could to infuse her with some traction to join the rest of our family in a happy life.
In the infrequent moments where she'd find her way out of the rut (happy, chipper, smiley, gonna get healthy, yah!), almost without fail I'd emotional collapse and slide into my own rut.
Sometimes that would bubble up as irritability, like my resentment kicked in once she was of sound mind. Sometimes it was a depression, where I just couldn't really function at capacity for the family. She'd even be sweet enough to say, "Don't worry. I've got this.", which never lasted for too long.
These weren't natural states for me, and looking back I assume it was just exhaustion. Like... "Ok you're fine now. It's my turn to retreat from the world and rest."
Though, I'm not sure if that's the entirety of it. Anyone with more experience in understanding codependency that can speak to what this is? Is it common?

I continue to have the best time exploring my way through Nocturne Alchemy! My previous NAVA reviews are here:

• Batch #1, my favorites including Alchemist Chamomile, Cardamom Musk, Afternoon Tea Cat, and Eternal Ankh Snow
• Batch #2, my favorites including Honeysuckle Crystalline, Snowy Woolly, and Love & Otters
• Batch #3, my favorites including Crystalline #8 and #9, Eternal Ankh Violet, Butterfly Orange and Butterfly Yellow, Tea Rex, and Peter
• Batch #4, my favorites including Spring '23 Musk, Mourning Tea, Aset's Frangipani Sandalwood, Eternal Ankh Rose de Mai, and Eternal Ankh Summer
• Batch #5, my favorites including Eternal Tut Ankh Amun, Eternal Ankh Labradorite, Masquerade RA, and V by Thoth

Now here's my next 20 reviews for your reading pleasure! In this batch, I include a couple of eNVie decants I've been able to try as well - eNVie Parfum is Nocturne Alchemy's sister company, and eNVie's amber accord Saphir appears in a lot of NAVA perfumes.
NAVA is one of the most expensive houses, and I want to point out that you don't have to buy hundreds of dollars of full-sizes in order to explore their catalog and enjoy their artistry. I owe huge thanks to everyone who has sold or gifted me a decant, sample, or partial bottle. In fact, I have never actually ordered direct from the house myself! My best advice, if you want to explore NAVA, is to include freebie sniffies in your Ajevie order. When you check out, there's a text box in which you can ask for NAVAs specifically, and if they're available, they'll send you empty full-sizes! There's almost always still enough left to try, and it's been a great (and fantastically cost-effective) way for me to experience so many of NAVA's perfumes. You don't get to pick what you get, of course, but that in itself has been useful because it has allowed me to try a wide range of NAVA's notes, including some things I wouldn't have picked for myself (as you can see in a few of the reviews below). And then I can include these "empty" bottles as freebies when people order from my own destash - always great to spread the love!
Since folks keep saying it's helpful, I'll recopy my "basics of the NAVA collections" information. NAVA sells three categories of things:

• The Permanent Collection are those scents they always keep around. PC scents are available in small 2-mls (which range in price from $11.50 to $12.50) in addition to the larger full-size bottles. (This is useful because if you're placing an Ajevie order during a NAVA pre-order window, you can get PCs as reasonably affordable add-ons - this is a great way to try some of the most beloved NAVA scents.) Unfortunately, the vanillas are not PCs...
• Which brings us to the second category: Studio Limited scents. SL scents are basically permanent as far as I can tell, but they are not offered in 2-ml small sizes. This is troublesome when you're a newbie NAVA fan trying to learn your way around this house but not spend too much money. Ajevie will occasionally decant SL scents, but only when NAVA adds new ones to a given SL collection. Otherwise, you have to buy full-sizes, or seek a friendly decanter. This is where to find the famous "Vanilla Haven" and "Musk Haven" collections. u/anathemas has tried and reviewed a LOT of the musks (bless you!). u/araelykin of Arae Decantery is working on getting a lot of the Studio Limited scents, especially the Musk Haven, in stock as decants, and already has quite a few available for order.
• The third category is the one that seems to turn a lot of people off from this house: the Limited Edition collections. NAVA is a house that runs on FOMO (fear of missing out). Seasonally throughout the year (Valentines, spring, summer, Halloween, holiday, and so on), NAVA releases a giant Limited Edition collection that is made up of two parts. First, the new scents that year; second, the "Resurgence" scents, which are (most of) the scents newly introduced in the previous year. Thus, a given LE perfume is likely to be around for exactly two years, no more: the first year it appears, and the next year when it's a Resurgence. You can find a fantastically useful archive of NAVA LEs HERE (I refer to that handy website all the time!). On the one hand, this is a decent model because you can theoretically sample in the first year (from Ajevie or Arae, or for much faster shipping since they only deal with NAVA, Crypta Obscura; or by seeking decants/samples from this community a few months later) and then buy more the next year if you love it. The NAVA Facebook group contains really useful review roundup posts if you're wondering what folks think of any of these LE scents. On the other hand, this sales model absolutely encourages a spirit of frantic buying to stave off FOMO. ("Oh no, this is its second year, the scent will be gone forever, I must buy more than I'll ever actually realistically use!") The best advice I've heard is not to worry: NAVA recycles basic combinations a lot, so if you miss a particular perfume, chances are something similar will come around within a couple of years.

eNVie

(From their sister company, eNVie Parfum)

• Bleu Saphir ["Soft opal amber infused with seductive musks and bleu absolutes and hues of colour from herbs, musks and flowers. A bleu saphir shrouded in mystery, evocative and subtle in sensuality. Top Note: Blue Chamomile Absolute, Labdanum, Siam Benzoin, Blue Sumian Lavender and Coral Wood. Heart Note: Blue Cypress, Blue Yarrow Absolute and Blue Tansy infused in Blue Amber and Saphir. Base Note: As the Ambre notes release wood sweetness the Egyptian Amber & Musk Resin purified into natural notes of blue fixtures melding within the journey of the scent carrying chamomile and lavender throughout in fleeting beautiful moments of breath. The woods notes are subtle but hold the perfume up within the olfactory and create an atmosphere of illusion on the skin. Saphir and blue amber, when warmed, create the opulence of a blue opal; the study for this perfume."] - This one made me nervous in the vial, smelling really quite sharp and almost sour. But I tried it anyway, and was extremely pleasantly surprised! It's very much the familiar, lovely, balsamic Saphir paired with floaty blue florals and a haze of soft musks. Extremely long-lasting, even for NAVA, lasting literally all day and into the evening - my morning scent was still my bedtime scent!
• Poivre Saphir [A more exotic subtle spiced potion with black tea that highlights the spices without permeating only spice but balances so beautifully with saphir and vanilla notes that enrich the scent; balsam, benzoin and white tonka bean incense. A scent of transformation.] - It's a really headshoppy incense paired with an absolute extravaganza of chai spices, without any sweetness to them and especially heavy on the black pepper. There's hints of wood and amber, and definitely a taste of balsamic Saphir. Husband smells something chlorinated to this as well, so he doesn't really like it on me. While it's not my favorite autumnal incense, there's something really confident about this scent - and that goes for its volume as well, with really vibrant sillage. "Subtle" this is not. The deep drydown is absolutely to die for, all malty black tea with incense, Saphir, black pepper, and other spices.
• Noir Lyceum [A beautifully spiced cardamom, sweet vanilla-oud-saphir heaven. Delightful perfume notes imported and blended into the eNVie saphir house note. Sweetened with rich tonka, vanilla bean and exquisitely spiced with the highest quality of cardamom and exotic wood of agarwood.] - The opening, with rich warm vanilla and tonka and a vibrant spiced cardamom, is absolutely heavenly, but oh no, within mere moments the oud kicks in. At first just a hint of smoke, totally ignorable, but soon it became full-on barbeque smoke and I just can't. SO SAD.

Permanent Collection

"Bastet's Garden" collection

• Blue Lotus Diamond [Rare Blue Lotus, Golden Frankincense, Amber Musk and the charm and faience of Studio Limited - Diamond (Redwood and Cedar)] - I expected the lotus flower and the woodsy notes to fight with each other, but they're a surprisingly harmonious whole! There's a lot of blue lotus with its watery sweetness on top, with warm amber and redwood notes mingling underneath. I don't really love lotus, personally, but folks who like this note should absolutely give this one a try.

"Egypt & Her Wonders" collection

• Blue Egypt [Egyptian Blue Lavender Essential Oil, Manuka Lavender, Egyptian and Indian Chamomile Essential Oil, Aloe Vera Absolute, Egyptian Blue Vanilla Bean Whole, Palmerosa Absolute, Languid Lavender Cider and a drop each of Angelica Root and Valerian Root] - A very herbal, almost medicinal lavender paired with a lovely floral chamomile over an indistinctly vanilla-ish musk base. It's extremely calming, basically the perfect sleepy bedtime lavender scent - though it's also gorgeous as a day scent too, which also lets you take advantage of its astonishing, all-day longevity.

"Etherias" collection

• Etherian Ambre [Amber (NA Studio Accord), Cola Root, Sarsaparilla Root, Black Patchouli Wood, White Vetiver, Bastet’s Amber Absolute, Vanilla Pod, Cacao Bean and Australian Sandalwood] - A resinous, darkly glowing golden amber dusted with patchouli and oud, like a generous helping of black pepper on a fancy pasta dish. The amber has just a touch of balsamic sharpness to it, and I wouldn't be surprised if there was just a drop of Saphir in this. Like most NAVA ambers, it lasts forever.

Studio Limited

Musk Haven

• Black Currant Musk [French Black Currant Absolute, Black Currant skin, California Green Currant leaf, Bastet’s Amber and soft white floral blend of Tuberose, Mallow, Angelica, Musk Flower, and White Lily all blended beautifully into Bastet's Musk base] - I get blackberry more than blackcurrant, which is great for me because I love blackberry notes! It's a dark, juicy blackberry and a ton of ever-so-slightly floral and green undertones, and a ton of super fuzzy, extremely cozy musk. There's no vanilla here but the musk is so soft and sweet that it almost gives that impression. This is everything I wanted Blackberry Kobalt [Egyptian Blackberry, White Musk, Kobalt Vanilla Orchid, Blue Egyptian Basil, Black Honey and a kiss of Blue Sugar] to be (but it wasn't). Like much of the Musk Haven, it's super pretty, quite linear, and short-lived. I bet it would be great for layering.
• Neroli Musk [Neroli (steam distillate) and Orange Flower (enfleurage) extracts, South African Neroli, Egyptian Neroli, aged eNVie saphir, and soft white floral blend of Tuberose, Mallow, Angelica, Musk Flower, and White Lily all blended beautifully into Bastet's Musk base] - The delicate sweetness and velvety white floral of orange blossom with a bitter herbal undertone that I often notice when a perfume lists neroli rather than orange blossom, on a haze of floaty Bastet's Musk. It's very pretty and also extremely fleeting.
• Sandalwood Musk [Egyptian and Indian Sandalwood, Sandalwood chips, Australian Sandalwood, Heartwood, and soft white floral blend of Tuberose, Mallow, Angelica, Musk Flower, and White Lily all blended beautifully into Bastet's Musk base] - Simple and utterly gorgeous. It's a fuzzy, warm, delicate sandalwood that reminds me a LOT of the sandalwood in my beloved Poesie Comfort [Toasted cardamom pods, pink peppercorn, precious resins, sandalwood flower, cashmere blankets, warm vanilla musk], though of course without the cardamom and vanilla. Instead, it's joined here by a Bastet's Musk base and by a touch of lemon, as if there's a palo santo note alongside all the sandalwoods.
• Tibetan Incense Musk [Tibetan Incense accord of lotus blossom absolute, eNVie saphir, White Patchouli absolute, Jasmine essence, Rose petal essence, Vanilla fleck, Frankincense Resin and a sensual skin musk made from soft white floral blend of Tuberose, Mallow, Angelica, Musk Flower, and White Lily all blended beautifully into Bastet's Musk base] - Much fuzzier than Tibetan Crystalline (see below), and the incense not nearly as strong. This one is mostly the soft, silky, vaguely white-floral Bastet's Musk, with whiff of incense accenting it, rather than primarily a strong incense scent. It's really pretty and quite demure.

Originals

• Tibetan Crystalline [Deep incense of Indian Nag Champa Studio Blend (Champa, Indian Sandalwood, Benzoin and Henna), Mesua Ferrea Absolute, Aged Crystalline Absolute, Tibetan Musk undertones and soft spirals of pure Bergamot leaf essential oil] - This is pretty much a perfect church incense scent! The incense is deep and mysterious but not overly smoky nor too resinous, and the Crystalline doesn't make it vanilla-ish but just really smooth and lovely. I also get a waxy, almost beeswax candle kind of note, which only enhances the liturgical association for me. It's so fabulous that it feels a little needy to complain about it, but this really does feel like a layering note - a perfect incense fragrance, but one that calls out for another note or two to really turn it into a complete perfume. Nevertheless, I anticipate wearing this SO much, especially in the colder months.

Vanilla Haven

• Opal Vanilla [Bastet’s Vanilla Custard accord, Bastet’s Ice Cream Absolute accord, Crystalline Vanilla Absolute, Vanilla Pudding accord, Vanilla Liqueur accord, True Vanilla Absolute from pod/fleck/orchid, French Vanilla Whole Beans pods, Bavarian Crème accord, Vanilla Crème, Vanilla Caramel, Brown Sugar and Vanilla Cookie essence accord] - In the vial, it smells similar to Eternal Tut Ankh Amun [Bourbon Vanille Absolute, Crystalline Absolute, Tonka Absolute, Bastet's Vanilla Bean Absolute accord and White Amber], with its luscious caramel-golden bourbon vanilla, but on my skin an unpleasantly artificial, plasticky buttercream note emerges, and it's so strong that it ruins the fragrance for me. Much too gourmand! Opal Vanilla will head to my destash; meanwhile I washed it off and put on some ETAA and was very happy.

Limited Edition

Halloween 2023

• Crystalline #13 [Crystalline Absolute, Moonflower Accord, Pear skin, Agave Nectar, Amber, Poppy accord, Italian Lemon, Bastet’s Musk Absolute, Allspice, eNVie saphir Absolute, Lotus Blossom, Rose Petal, Jasmine essence, White Patchouli, and French Vanilla Bean] - Another of NAVA's beautiful vanilla-fruity-florals! They do this style so well and I love these in spring. This one is extraordinarily smooth, just super silky, and positively multicolored in its various fruit and floral notes. It's hard to pick out all of them specifically, but I do definitely get red apple, pear, and lemon, plus florals that include rose and that silken moonflower. It's really lovely!

Summer 2023

• Crystalline #11 [Sandalwood Milk accord, Santalum extract, Australian Sandalwood, Sandalwood Chips in Oudh blend, Golden Indian Sandalwood, Kobalt (Studio Limited Originals) Vanilla, Jasmine, Cedarwood, Red Sandalwood and Crystalline (Studio Limited Originals)] - A woodsy-creamy sandalwood and NAVA's lovely vanilla, this one recognizably a mix of Kobalt and Crystalline. It's difficult to say which of the sandalwood or vanilla are stronger because each of them seems the star on alternate sniffs! This is woodsier, more milky, and a little less addictive to my nose than Snowy Woolly [Vanilla essence, Indian Sandalwood, French Vanilla, Coconut Husk, Bastet’s Musk absolute and White Sandalwood], but it's a reasonable alternative if you're looking for the unctuous, gorgeous simplicity of vanilla + sandalwood. A touch of smoky oud comes out in the drydown, which is a welcome addition that makes this scent just a touch more complex.

Spring 2023

• Cardamom & Anise Tea [Black Tea accord, Rich Organic Cardamom oil, Organic Japanese Star Anise oil, Bastet’s Amber, and Skin Musk] - A strongly spiced black tea! I was nervous about the anise since that's not a spice I much enjoy eating or smelling like. Wet, I adore this scent - the anise is but an accent to the gloriously strong cardamom. Alas, like most NAVA cardamoms, it starts to dissipate pretty quickly, and the drydown is a sharp, licorice anise with a mere hint of cardamom, over a really lovely black tea. I'm safe from wanting to buy more of this when it returns next spring! But I think I'll keep and use my sample - there are surely days when I'll be happy to wear such strong anise so that I can also have the lovely black tea and cardamom notes. Incidentally, my rabbit Hemlock HATES this one and ran away from me when I wore it!
• Encens Bois de Santal [Australian Sandalwood absolute, New Caledonia Sandalwood, Sweet Santalum Album, White Sandalwood, Sweet Sandalwood Incense accord, Incense accord, and Bastet’s Musk] - A deep, dark, woodsy sandalwood paired with a really lovely incense. It's beautifully autumnal even if not terribly original or memorable. Sadly it's short-lived for NAVA, which I'm surprised by because their incense and sandalwood both tend to last all day on me, but not here. Gorgeous though.

Summer 2022

• REX [Limestone Amber accord, Amber, eNVie saphir absolute, Bastet’s Amber absolute, Bourbon Vanille Absolute and NA Jurassic Amber accord] - I went into this with some trepidation - the one other time I'd tried a NAVA with their limestone accord (it was one of the dinosaurs), it went all band-aidy on me. Newly applied to my skin, and for about an hour afterwards, this was a very pleasant surprise: a really warm, sandy amber with a subtle sweetness to it and a bit of that balsamic amber Saphir. Husband liked it too, and said he definitely got a distinct "marble" stone note from it (I didn't - marble feels "cool" to me whereas this was reading as very warm and sandy, more sandstone than limestone but definitely not marble). Alas, a couple of hours into its wear, it developed a whiff of that latexy band-aid quality. Boo. I guess I can now cross off any NAVA with a limestone note...but if their limestone works for you, gosh this is such a pretty combination with the Saphir and all the other ambers.

Holiday 2019

• Incense Chai [Creamed Incense accord, Chai Black Tea and spices of Allspice/Clove/Nutmeg, Sweet Myrrh Resin, Vanilla dust, Vanuatu Santal, Bastet’s Musk] - Ummmmfff, what a delicious autumn incense perfume! This incense accord is awfully close to my beloved NCD cathedral incense, and here it's paired beautifully with a low-tannic black tea and an amazing well-balanced blend of chai spices (not too much cinnamon or nutmeg or clove, but just right). There's enough vanilla and musk to provide a solid base, but those aren't the stars. Oh how tragic, this was from Holiday 2019 and long gone so it'll be hard to find some more after this little Ajevie slink runs out...

Valentines 2019

• Gray Bunny [Cream Soda Accord, Coconut Milk, Pink Peppercorn, NA Bourbon Vanille Absolute, Sweetgrass, Heliotrope and Neroli] - I'd never tried NAVA's cream soda note before, but wow, it's definitely cream soda! Fizzy, sugary, and slightly caramelized. It is paired here with with some indistinct florals and a vanillic marshmallow, and a hint of pink pepper. It's not enough of a peppery kick to cut through the several sugar notes, though, at least for me - it ends up being a pretty gourmand scent overall.

Halloween 2016

• Pumpkin Crystalline Chai [Decadent Indian Chai Tea Spices, Indian Black Tea, Pumpkin Tea (NA accord), Pumpkin flesh, all swirling in a rich cauldron of Crystalline Vanilla] - A very tonka-hay sort of pumpkin, with the standard autumn spices (heavy on the cinnamon) and nondescript vanilla base (my nose doesn't identify it as Crystalline specifically). This feels extremely fall-candley - it reminds me a lot of the Voluspa Spiced Pumpkin Latte candle I loved to burn in autumn before I realized I'm slightly allergic to candles and had to get rid of all of mine. As it turns out, I'm slightly allergic to this perfume too - the cinnamon caused a skin reaction. I don't get much tea; perhaps NAVA has improved their black tea notes since 2016. I'm utterly delighted to have had the chance to try this - it had been on my wishlist for quite some time! - and also a bit relieved to not love it (and thus feel the impulse to try to seek out more of what would undoubtedly be a difficult one to find).

Hello! This post is a lot longer than I think most people are going to read, which I completely understand.
I am not initially editing this down because in my deep dive into autism, I have read some very long Reddit posts from people questioning whether they're autistic because they happen to interest me, so I think there's a chance someone will read this. If you do--I'm just looking to find someone who relates on some of the stuff I'm unsure about, and maybe knows something about or has experienced these things within autism that I haven't been able to find.
If you see this and think it is WAY too long to welcome helpful answers, honestly I would appreciate that comment too--I'm not good at telling stories with minimal detail, but I can try if y'all think it will help.
TL;DR 20f questioning whether she's autistic due to inconsistent alignment with researched traits and diagnostic criteria.
I am a 20 year old woman. I've been diagnosed with ADHD since I was 5. And for the past couple months--and less consistently for a couple years--most of what I think about has been autism and whether I'm autistic.
I fit some criteria, but not all. Some criteria, I am unsure about.
The spark for this consideration was the combination of coming across autistic TikTok and my years-long obsession with trying to figure out why I can't make friends and am so scared of social situations. Although I have little to no memory of most of my life--which is proving to be a huge issue while I figure this out--I know I felt very confused about what was happening and constantly anxious in middle and high school.
I relate to the feeling of being different than other people. I can tell I think about life differently and don't understand everything that everyone else seems to understand. I have never thought I was an alien like many autistic people seem to mention, but to be fair, I was terrified of aliens when I was a kid.
Concerning friends: I had one group of friends from elementary to high school, technically, but for all of that time that I can remember, I didn't really understand why or how we were friends. My mom became friends with their moms when I was in elementary school, so I was included in group plans for as long as our parents were the ones setting them up. This continued into the beginning of high school, when we made our own plans, but it always felt like pity because after a while, I rarely talked to them and didn't know how to talk to their new high school friends at ALL. The more the members of the group changed and expanded their friendships to new people, the less I knew--I had these friends by default, because I made them in elementary where I'm fairly sure my hyperactivity made it easy enough for me to make friends (even though I apparently annoyed people), but now that I had to figure out how to do so on my own I was totally lost. In high school, I quickly stopped understanding where to sit and how to interact at lunch, and there was a point after I got my license and stopped caring that other people thought I was sad and lonely when I went home for lunch alone every single day from that day to the end of high school.
I had one close friend in middle school and another who was that friend's childhood best friend, but that second one is another situation where I did not and would not have known how to facilitate friendship on my own. Again, I was a yes-man 100% of the time. I didn't know how to act any other way. My "best friend" in high school (I'm still friends with her--she has been diagnosed ADHD as long as I have, and was recently diagnosed with autism) is very similar to me but someone I've always tried to emulate because she makes friends very easily (outwardly, at least) and is very outgoing. I've always felt ashamed of this because I've heard so many people speak about how being a chameleon is manipulative. I definitely spoke more like her when I was trying to do this, but I'm not sure if this is true to an extent that a neurotypical person would not do.
I have always been the person "adopted by extraverts," even though I have wanted to be left alone for as long as I can remember. I am fairly familiar with the pitched-up voice adopted by neurotypical people toward neurodivergent people when they figure out you're different--although this decreased as I learned to be more like them.
I have always--since elementary school--gravitated toward people who I either knew were autistic at the time, heavily suspect are autistic, or know have since been diagnosed autistic; I believe this is relevant due to the many accounts I've come across of autistic people attracting autistic people, although I know ADHD-autistic friendships are common and commented on as well.
On relationships: I have a girlfriend. We've been together for almost a year--kind of. For the first five months we knew each other, I said yes to everything and had absolutely no issue with the fact that she had just come out of a relationship, so didn't want to start one officially with me until she was far from that. I still don't have an issue with that, but after she apologized about it for the hundredth time I started to get the sense that it the scenario and the fact that we weren't official for five months (despite being more than friends immediately--I met her on tinder) something that would have concerned or even angered other people. Although I kind of understand it in the way that I understand the progression of thought that would lead one to concern, I still don't understand on a deeper level. I just thought that she said she needed more time, so she needed more time! Plus, I finally found someone who was blunt and told me exactly what was happening, so I finally understood what was happening in a dating scenario. (I liked her for other reasons too, but none as relevant to this post.) Before this, I've had two almost-relationships in which I hung out with a guy and ended it after I discovered how invested they were. The first one told my friend I had agreed to be his girlfriend, and I freaked out and ended things with him the next day. I still don't understand why he thought I was his girlfriend. Back to my current partner--in addition to that, I can mark a spot in our timeline when I stopped masking. I'm fairly sure it was after I started educating myself on autism. Before that, it was exhausting to hang out with her because I hid a lot of who I was--it didn't even occur to me not to. I actively made myself out to be someone who loves being social and has no anxiety around it. I was not trying to be manipulative; I just still thought that was someone I should force myself to be.
Socializing successfully feels like I won a game. I have learned how to be very smooth and charming--still unsure and awkward plenty, but self-effacing enough that I seem very confident--so it feels like I finally figured out this huge game that everyone got a rulebook to except for me. This has become more difficult recently; I moved to a different state with my sister this year and made the decision after only about a month that I didn't want to pressure myself to make friends, so I haven't had to mask much. It's making me question whether what I've done in the past is masking, honestly, at least partially because it's hard to understand the past in my always-present brain
On jobs and masking: I question constantly whether I mask to the extent that I could be masking autism, and I understand more nonverbal communication cues than many of the autistic people I encounter online. I am expressive and have always been VERY smiley. I remember forcing myself in high school to go to different stores and order food, or buy clothes and check out, so I was forced to interact with cashiers and learn how to do it. I have had three jobs: dishwashing, barista-ing, and another barista job that didn't last very long. I have NEVER understood how to interact with my coworkers.
The first barista job, I was there for a year. I was a great employee because even if I messed up (frequent--forgetting things is a constant for me, and I am horrible at verbal processing), I would make up for it with as much work as I could possibly do, and the only way I knew how to interact with my coworkers and boss was to compliment them (similarly to how I interact with most people), so I was known for being very nice. But I dreaded any moment with my coworkers where the dialogue was unrelated to work because I had NO idea how to talk to them. I know to ask about their weekend and a few other things, but once that ran out--no idea. Talking to customers was stressful because past compliments on their clothes and whatever they talked to me about, I had no idea what to say.
My dishwashing job was before that. I have a tendency to go for the single most difficult job I could do--for some reason I feel like I have something to prove--and I have always HATED doing dishes, so I chose that. I worked very long shifts on both Saturday and Sunday during my senior year of high school (no friends to see on the weekend), and my manager told me when I quit that I was the most dedicated dishwasher they'd had. But, again: no idea at all how to talk to my coworkers. I was so awkward, I absolutely dreaded moments when I wasn't working and talking about work, and somehow a rumor got started that I was a teen mother who was working these long weekend shifts to pay for her child. Not sure how, but that is both funny and feels somehow relevant.
The second barista job was the same socially, but even harder to handle due to the more and more diverse tasks I was tasked with, a manager who did not respond to flattery--so, no idea how to navigate--and a coworker who subtly called me out for being weird and outwardly told me I was bad at my job. I quit that job after a couple months.
On broader masking and social anxiety: that I can remember, I have rarely, maybe never scripted. If I am autistic, I am confident that this is because I couldn't be bothered--I have ADHD and an inability to process the past or future seemingly to a greater extent than anyone I have encountered. This is something that I, my family, and every therapist or psychiatrist I've had fails to understand. If I'm not autistic, then I guess the lack of scripting and ruminating on interactions after the fact is due to a lack of autism. But I do think it could be related to an inability to think forward or backward. I have definitely spent quite a lot of time googling social rules and "how to make friends," but I'm not certain whether these actions fall outside of the actions of a socially anxious introvert. But I have felt like I don't know what to say in very many social situations. I always had extreme anxiety around every social situation--parties, classes, in between classes, talking to neighbors, talking to cousins and grandparents, and at times of higher pressure even in speaking to my immediate family--because I didn't know what was going to happen. I didn't know what I was going to say when someone spoke to me, or where in the room to stand, or how to look like I knew what was happening. This feels frustratingly close to an autistic lack of understanding of social dynamics, but I can't necessarily separate it from more general social anxiety. But I have never arrived anywhere even a single minute early if I could help it, in order to minimize uncertainty. I used to panic and cry if my mom tried to drive me somewhere--example, to choir practice--early, well into high school. The never-early habit continues today--to a lesser extent, because I understand what to say and ask about now for a bit if the situation has not been laid out for me/structured beforehand.
I have limited--I guess I'll call them scripts, but again, I am not confident enough in this to say that I script--scripts for small talk, but I will get into it with you about deeper subjects. I am a deep thinker and obviously my brain never stops talking to me, so I have a lot to say in that regard.
I continue to question whether I'm autistic because more scenarios feel somewhat more accessible to me than they did a few years ago. I do identify a "motor" running in my head during a lot of these scenarios which I have mostly figured, but not all--like, I don't think I have to think about what to say to a cashier at a grocery store anymore.
On lack of flat affect and bluntness: A reason I doubt an autism diagnosis for myself is that I have never been too blunt--maybe as a child, but even then I was often outwardly very sweet. I have always been the opposite--definitely a people pleaser and a person who will compliment you till you look uncomfortable, and nurture you in times of distress. I remember watching the Parks and Rec episode in ninth grade where Chris learns that instead of fixing people's problems, it's helpful just to say "that sucks. I'm sorry." when comforting. That made me ecstatic because I never understood how to help people past telling them my own experiences. (I know that's a neurodivergent thing.)
Another reason for questioning whether I have autism is that I frequently use language tht is not direct, or at least I don't say what I want to say. I know this is due to learning from a passive-aggressive dad, but I am unsure my use of indirect language and the fact that I understand at least some of the indirect language directed at me would be possible if I was autistic.
Regarding special interests--I am unsure whether this counts, but I have been obsessed with trying to figure out my social deficits since the beginning of high school. For at least freshman year (that's what I can remember), I would take very-way-too-long showers and sit down and take social anxiety quizzes and read about social anxiety. That turned into reading frequently about social deficits in ADHD, then into autism. Before that--I was obsessed with Harry potter from grades 2-8. I read the series 20 times and owned and read every book I could get my hands on about the books and movies; I only asked for Harry Potter-related gifts for birthdays and Christmas for most of those years, so I had a lot. I forced myself to stop my obsession around eighth grade, because I noticed my peers becoming less interested in "children's books" like these and started to think that maybe being labeled "the Harry Potter girl" by all friends, family, and acquaintances was making me stick out. The feedback was never negative, but eventually I noticed people continued to treat me like a younger kid while I was getting older along with them.
On childhood: My dad took a lot of pictures and videos of my sisters and I as kids, and I have combed obsessively through all of them in the past month. I had no speech delay, had imperfect spelling at the ages where hyperlexia is supposed to be apparent--so I'm not sure I can cite hyperlexia as reasoning for a lack of a speech delay-- and seemed like a mostly social kid. To be fair, I clearly had no sense of boundaries and was way too enthusiastic for most people (confirmed by my mother), but it seems like this could be an exclusively ADHD trait. I do wonder whether it's possible that ADHD traits masked some autistic traits in my childhoodI know that I hated sharing, and my mom also mentioned that I engaged in parallel play. She told me that they thought for a very short time that I might be autistic for that reason, but that eventually I grew out of that and that this suspicion was very short-lived. I learned through watching these childhood videos that I did not like sharing my things. I still don't, although I tolerate it. I was very into reading in elementary school, even being labeled and displayed as the "poster child for reading stamina" in first grade, and was at an 11th grade reading level (according to testing--idk if I believe that) from at least third grade. In addition, my third grade teacher and many of my teachers since then have commented regularly that my writing is impressive. But I worry it doesn't seem extreme enough and I didn't speak early enough for this fixation on reading to be an ADHD trait, and for the intelligence and often-noted writing to be related to autism/hyperlexia. (Please correct me if I have said something ignorant about hyperlexia; I have researched this less than other autistic traits.) Also, I have been obsessed with and hyper-aware of grammatical and semantic rules since third grade. I made myself stop mentioning this at some point because people kept getting annoyed with me. Not entirely sure how that relates to autism, but it does feel like it could be. In terms of my childhood videos--I spun so much on these videos--clear stimming, but I guess that can also be explained by ADHD, and I was naked so much of the time. I asked my mom about it, and she says I hated tags on clothes. I can remember walking into the lunchroom for the first time in kindergarten and being completely overwhelmed both by the smell and by the endless options for lunch tables, all with very upsetting crumbs on them, all too cold, and with no way of knowing the "right" one to choose. That was upsetting, and I never stopped having the exact same issues with lunch rooms. Now, I have some sensory issues but they only cause distress some of the time, and I don't think I identify the extreme exhaustion that people mention coming after sensory overload. I FaceTime and watch shows with my girlfriend a lot (we're long-distance right now) and for some reason I seem to overload and need a lack of sensory input and wish I had a weighted blanket after a while of that. I have no idea why that's when it happens.
Since childhood (confirmed by my mom again:), I have not shared information about myself automatically when people share with me. It does not feel natural, and I have had to learn that story-sharing is expected to be reciprocal. I still don't like sharing about myself unless I have a reason to do so which has not been dictated by others, so I avoid reciprocation whenever possible.
More on sensory issues: I have had issues around food my whole life. Not pickiness as much in my own food (although I was definitely a kid who ate things in a specific order and required separated foods and different plates for foods that were too different--I still do this to some extent); more an aversion to seeing, smelling, touching others' food. I've always had issues sharing utensils and water bottles, spit makes me gag (possible food in there), and the sight of food on someone's face is extremely upsetting. My roommate last year was also ADHD and extremely messy. She cooked constantly and left the kitchen a mess, and there were food smells and dishes everywhere in that tiny apartment 24/7. It was hell for me. I smoked weed constantly with her that whole year, and while this was a continuing possible addiction from the previous year, I have absolutely no doubt that I used it to cope with the sensory hell that was my apartment. (I don't smoke weed constantly anymore.)
On meltdowns and rigidity: I can not identify meltdowns in most of my life, or shutdowns. The one exception is that I know I tend to freak out at holidays and on my birthday because I have always had an inexplicably extreme reaction when gifts aren't exactly what I wanted. I have always been painfully aware that this is inappropriate, and in reality I am extremely grateful for all gifts I've received, but I've never been able to deal with receiving anything other than exactly what I wanted to get. I can see that being related somehow to a hatred of change or black-and-white thinking. Thoughts along the lines of "why didn't they get me what I wanted? do they not love me?" run very aggressively through my head while I shame myself for being bratty. I have only failed to hide this once, in third-fifth (can't remember) grade when I threw what appeared to be a tantrum after my step-grandpa got me a white volleyball and not the blue one I asked for. I held it together until after he left, then exploded in front of my sisters and mom. It was a lot of "I don't understand" and absolutely devastated sobbing and a total loss of control, and I was very embarrassed. Since and before then, after opening gifts on my birthday and at Christmas, I will always politely retreat to the bathroom and cry quietly and try to get out the excess emotions and movement that I could not before. Then I return to help clean up, although I am usually still tired and distraught. I can hide it pretty well. Other than that, I can't really identify occurrences that could be meltdowns or shutdowns.
I can identify rigid thinking in my sense of justice and my knee-jerk reaction to my current and past roommates leaving dishes and other food-related things out--even though I am imperfect in my housekeeping and am aware of this, I immediately think it's absurd that they think it's okay to leave dishes out like that. I get immediately angry at the injustice and utter disrespect. (I mostly don't say that out loud.)
Literal thinking: I am unsure whether I think literally. One possible instance of this is my inability to fully discount anyone's explanation or opinion if I can trace it with reason--if I can see how they got there, I find it impossible to fully write them off. On a different level, I can understand where people with harmful opinions go wrong, but I can't turn off that other part of my brain.
There was also a years-long period where I exclusively fought with my dad who would say sexist things about my clothes and had very rigid political and moral ideas. He's also ADHD, and due to his EXTREME organization of his own life, extensive knowledge on Apple products, extreme intolerance to sensory input and resulting retreat to his room or explosions my whole life, lack of understanding of what questions are okay to ask people across all realms, immediate deep dive into strangers' lives without hesitation, and the obsessive documentation and cataloging of mine and my sisters' childhoods and as many school documents as he could find which made it possible for me to scour my past as mentioned, I have been wondering whether he could be autistic. At the same time...a lot of that sounds like stereotypical "dad" stuff. But we fought so often and we both have extremely rigid morals and ideologies which happen to oppose each other, so we are always both certain that we are right. A lot of these fights ended in me physically not being able to speak at all; just starting words and crying because I was so overwhelmed, and feeling trapped in my mind and body. I worry that I'm overly pathologizing at this point, but this happened enough times that I wonder whether I can reasonably label this as selective mutism.
If you read this, bless you in the most sincere way, and I hope your day is good.