Meizitang soft capsule

For reference, my last two headsets were the Stealth 700 Gen 2 Xbox, and the Corsair HS80 Max. I may compare to those. My use case is on PC
Build: Definitely doesn’t feel “premium”, but the plastic is more flexible and feels less brittle than the 700 Gen 2s. Doesn’t feel like dropping it or a hard knock will hurt it. The Corsairs definitely are better built.
Comfort: VERY light. Headband isn’t noticeable whatsoever, and the clamping force isn’t strong. Earcups have enough depth for me (I’m very sensitive to earpad depth, so this is a big plus for me). I do wish the opening in the earpads was more of an oval shape than a circle, I would like a tiny bit more height to the opening. The earpad material itself is soft and comfy, and both the pads and earcups are nice and breathable.
Sound Quality: Very good out of the box. The Corsairs required EQ, and the 700 Gen 2s had overpowering bass. I have no desire to EQ these. Soundstage feels much wider (as it should being an open back). I’m running them at 85% volume, which is louder than my other headsets, so this may be an issue if you like playing at really loud volumes. The volume wheel feels good to use, but the steps in adjustment are not linear, hopefully this can be fixed with a firmware update.
Mic: Mic on the full preset and minor adjustments sounds about as good as my HS80 max. I was able to minimize the “esses” that the HS80 Max liked to accentuate, so very happy with that. The best position for the mic seems to be below your mouth, with the capsule tilted up towards it, and the windscreen on. Mic monitoring is nice and clear, and 70 worked for me. You can already hear your own voice due to being open back as well.
My biggest complaint with the mic is that when flipping it up to mute, it hits the side of your head unless you straighten it out of position. Also the mic doesn’t seem to be removable after first attaching it, at least without an uncomfortable amount of force.
Software: I had to do a firmware update when first setting them up, and they updated successfully the first time, and they update wirelessly which is nice. High Bandwidth Audio and Mic were turned on by default for me, but I needed to make sure the highest bandwidth was selected in Windows. All the functions worked in the software except for audio EQ, it added a weird distortion if anything was adjusted from one of the presets. But thankfully I love the default EQ.
Range and connection is very good, I was able to walk downstairs with no issues, crackles, pops, anything. I will update if that ends up changing.
Overall I’m happy with them, and will see if I prefer them overall to the HS80 Max after more use

Hi everyone,
I have had 2 root canal treatments on one tooth, and 4 on the tooth next to it in the last four weeks. The last treatment was last Wednesday the 15th of May. My jaw still hurts though. I have had 7 days of Amoxicillin, last capsule was yesterday morning. I am still in a lot of pain. Is this TMJ or is this something else? Pain is on the left side, up to my left ear. I am on painkillers, but still am very sore. No pus or extreme redness, no fever. I have had TMJ before. Will this take long or do I have to call the dentist again? (only thing that helps is chewing soft foods, and liquids) Can I do something else?

Hi all,
Going through process of fixing my very screwed up gut.
I've never taken well to probiotics ever, but past tries have just been aimless over the counter crap.
But after a GI MAP test I'm going through systematically with my naturopath focusing on the right bacteria to target first before others.
My first port of call is a strain that helps with digestion - I can get the exact type when I get home if it helps but it's not particularly relevant.
Initially when I took it I gained like a flabby/soft sort of fat on my tummy and legs (usually if I gain weight it's a bit more firm), and I also got a bunch of cherry angiomas (already had some, just got more with the probiotic).
I got so painfully bloated from it I got stretch marks, and lost appetite.
I stopped taking them, but my naturopath insisted to keep with it as I am having issues with food reactivity. So I've decided to re introduce them slowly (halving the capsules) as clearly my body is upset with it.
Is it relatively normal and/or expected for probiotics to be a little "worse" before they start getting better?
These are the first I've used where they haven't affected me cognitively - all others gave me really bad brain fog for ages.
Thanks in advance.

This week’s vintage batch features black hard rubber pens from three of the Big Four American Makers of the 1910s-20s. Nibs range from Flex to Wet Noodle. As always, all are fully restored and ready to write.
 
ALBUM & TIMESTAMP
 
Pastable link: https://imgur.com/a/R5fpCKe
 
Condition (n.b.): All pens listed below have been disassembled, cleaned and restored with new sacs installed in the last couple weeks. Each of these pens is guaranteed to fill and write as designed without leaks or other problems. Nibs have been adjusted when necessary to ensure that all lay down a smooth and consistent line.
THESE PENS HAVE NO CRACKS, CHIPS, PERSONALIZATIONS, LOOSE OR MISSING PARTS, BENT NIBS, MISALIGNED TINES, BROKEN/WORN OFF TIPPING, OR THREADING ISSUES.
 
Line Widths and Writing Samples: To provide buyers with as much information as possible, I have started to adopt the following line width standards: XXF (.1-.2mm); XF (approx .3mm); F (approx .4mm); M (approx .6mm); B (approx .8mm). Nib flexibility is determined by variation (max line width under pressure) and softness (amount of pressure). Flexibility designations based on variation generally run as follows for an XF/F nib: Semi-Flex (approx. 1mm); Flex (1.2-1.9mm); Superflex (>2mm). All line width measurements are taken with a digital caliper but should be considered approximations providing a general guide. Width may vary slightly depending on type of ink and paper used as well as amount of pressure applied. All writing samples are on Rhodia dot paper using Waterman Serenity Blue.
 
 
1. 1920s Waterman 92 1/2 (BCHR, GPT, lever filler, 14k XF Flex nib). This slender (1/2-sized) model is longer than a ring top but slightly shorter than a 52, measuring 4 3/4” capped and 6” posted. Not to be confused with the later, celluloid 92, this 92 1/2 is made of black chased hard rubber with gold-plated trim. It’s the first I’ve ever encountered. Cap came clipless from the factory (no holes drilled for a clip), but has been outfitted with a gold-plated accommodation clip. Based on its absence from US catalogues, I believe this model was made strictly for foreign export. The barrel has a Canadian imprint while the nib reads “Ideal / England,” it being a common practice for Waterman’s Canadian pens to be finished in England. That 14k nib is a Flexible writer (note change from writing sample after taking measurement. It lays down a smooth and consistent XF line that widens to a 3B+ (approx 1.8mm) under moderate pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Thin hairlines and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it a great choice for shaded writing. Condition: fine [C]. This pen has no functional flaws but does show some use. Hard rubber is an even dark chocolate color – still much darker than the brown these can turn. Chasing is significantly yet evenly weakened across the cap and barrel. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Gold-plating on the lever has a sliver of brassing in the center and parts of the clip look tarnished, though I’m not sure this amounts to full-fledged brassing. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel end are weakened but fully legible. An affordable user and a lovely writer for those wondering at what all the fuss is about early Watermans. Price: $150 SOLD
 
2. 1910s Waterman 12 Eyedropper (BCHR, German Silver clip, eyedropper filler, 14k F Superflex nib). This full-sized model measures 5 1/8” capped. This slip-cap eyedropper is made of black chased hard rubber with a rivet clip marked “German Silver” – less common than the standard nickel clips. This pen is an eyedropper. The section unscrews for the barrel to filled using an eyedroppepipette – holds far more ink than a lever filler of the same size. My usual caveats about early eyedroppers apply here. If carried, it is not uncommon to find a little ink on the nib or in the cap. Super-Flexible 14k Ideal NY #2 nib lays down a smooth and consistent F line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.5mm) under light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Easy variation and reliably wet flow over its full range of flex make it a great choice for calligraphic writing styles such as Copperplate and Spencerian. Condition: excellent- [B-]. Hard rubber of the cap is dark black with virtually no fading but center of barrel shows fading to dark chocolate under certain lights. Chasing on cap is sharp and deep but barrel chasing is very light and only visible when the light strikes it. German Silver clip is pristine with no brassing or other notable wear. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Manufacturer imprint on barrel is weak but mostly legible while number stamp on barrel-end is all but worn away. Price: $190 SOLD
 
3. c.1918 Waterman 52 (BCHR, NPT w/ Sterling Silver clip, lever filler, 14k XXF Needlepoint Superflex nib). This full-sized model measures 5 5/16” capped. A nice example of Waterman’s celebrated workhorse made of black chased hard rubber with a sterling silver Ideal accommodation clip with “Waterman’s / Made in France” stamped on one side and a hallmark that reads “GP” on the other side (DETAIL PHOTO). This pen came clipless from the factory (no holes drilled for a rivet clip). Super-Flexible 14k Ideal NY #2 nib has a needlepoint width and superb snap-back that gives it a surgically precise feel when writing. It lays down a smooth and consistent XXF line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.2mm) under light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Insanely responsive snap-back, needlepoint hairlines, and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it another excellent choice for calligraphic writing styles such as Copperplate and Spencerian. Condition: excellent [B]. Hard rubber retains its dark black color with virtually no fading. Chasing is weakened a bit yet readily visible over the cap and barrel. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Manufacturer imprint on barrel is quite weak and only partly legible while number stamp on barrel-end is deep and fully legible. Price: $260 SOLD
 
4. c.1918 Waterman 52 in Box (BCHR, NPT, lever filler, 14k M/B Superflex Factory Stub nib). This full-sized model measures 5 5/16” capped. This pen comes in its original factory box with 5-page pamphlet including care and filling instructions as well as other offerings from Waterman (BOX PHOTO). It’s a clean 52 made of black chased hard rubber with nickel-plated trim including earlier, wide rivet clip. 14k Ideal #2 nib is a Super-Flexible Factory Stub that manages to deliver sharp unflexed variation without compromising smoothness. Under normal pressure it lays down a smooth and consistent M/B line (approx .7mm) on the down-strokes and XF line on the cross-strokes. And the line widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.0mm) under light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE – note change in flex grade after measuring). A versatile nib whose responsive snap-back, easy variation, and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it well suited to shaded notes under normal pressure and calligraphic writing styles under flex, the Stub grind keeping one’s letterforms neat and straight. Condition: excellent+ [B+]. This pen and the one below came from an estate of someone who seems to have purchased these pens, wrote with them a few times, then stowed them away in their boxes. This one is definitely collector-grade, having seen very little use. Hard rubber retains its dark black color with no discernible fading. Chasing is evenly sharp and crisp. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel-end are deep and fully legible. Box is in sound condition with no torn ends but original owner managed somehow to burn a couple small holes in the paperwork. A boxed 52 with an uncommon nib in uncommonly clean condition. Price: $310 SOLD
 
5. c.1918 Waterman 55 in Box (BCHR, NPT, lever filler, 14k XF Flex/Superflex nib). This oversized model has a thick girth and measures 5 1/2” capped. This pen comes in its original factory box with 5-page pamphlet including care and filling instructions as well as other offerings from Waterman (BOX PHOTO). This pen is made of black chased hard rubber with nickel-plated trim including earlier, wide rivet clip. Commensurably oversized Ideal NY #5 nib yields Super-Flexible variation with Flexible softness. It lays down a smooth and consistent XF line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.1mm) under moderate pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE – note change in flex grade after measuring). Condition: excellent+/near mint [B+]. This pen came from the same estate as the 52 above and also resembles an artifact of a time capsule. Hard rubber retains its factory black color with no discernible fading. Chasing is factory sharp and crisp. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel-end are deep and fully legible. Box is in sound condition with no torn ends but original owner managed somehow to burn some small holes in the paperwork for this one as well. These big fellas are getting tougher to find, especially in this condition. Price: $440 SOLD
 
6. c.1921 Wahl Pen 72 (BCHR, NPT, lever filler, 14k XXF Superflex nib). This standard sized model measures 5 3/16” capped. Having purchased the assets of the Boston Fountain Pen Company, Wahl began manufacturing fountain pens in 1917. Wahl’s first pens were essentially rebranded Bostons and Tempoints (a NY company they acquired in 1918). The first full-fledged Wahls, dubbed simply “The Wahl Pen,” rolled off out of the factory in 1921. This 72 one of those pens. Its’s made of black chased hard rubber complemented by nickel-plated trim including Wahl’s patented roller-clip. The Wahl Pen is chiefly distinguished from earlier designs by its patented Wahl lever with apexed center. Super-Flexible 14k Wahl Pen #2 nib is a lovely writer. It lays down a smooth and consistent XF line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.4mm) under light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Needlepoint hairlines, superbly responsive snap-back, and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it another great choice for calligraphic writing styles. Condition: excellent [B+]. Hard rubber retains its factory black color with virtually no fading/oxidation. Chasing is factory deep and crisp with no discernible wear. Surface is smooth and lustrous with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Nickel-plated trim is exceptionally clean with no brassing or other noteworthy blemishes apart from light scratching to the clip. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel-end are deep and fully legible. Price: $280 $260
 
7. 1910s Parker Lucky Curve 20 (smooth BHR, eyedropper filler, 14k XF/F Superflex/Wet Noodle nib). This full-sized model measures 5 5/16” capped. Parker collectors know all too well how much harder it is to find early Parker eyedroppers compared to say, Waterman 12s. This simple, utilitarian Lucky Curve eyedropper from the early teens is made of smooth, black hard rubber. Slip cap came clipless from the factory (no holes drilled for a clip). Long Lucky Curve feed is intact. This pen is an eyedropper. The section unscrews for the barrel to filled using an eyedroppepipette – holds far more ink than a lever filler of the same size. My usual caveats about early eyedroppers apply here. If carried, it is not uncommon to find a little ink on the nib or in the cap. Early 14k Lucky Curve #2 nib with teardrop breather hole yields Super-Flexible variation with softness and flow verging on that of a Wet Noodle (comparable to a soft dip pen nib). It lays down a smooth and consistent XF/F line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.4mm) under very light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Thin hairlines with a light hand, strong snap-back, and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it another great choice for calligraphic writing styles such as Copperplate and Spencerian. Condition: excellent [B]. Black hard rubber retains its factory black color apart from minor fading to a deep, dark brown on the barrel visible under certain lights. Surface is smooth and lustrous with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes aside from a group of short scratches to the left of the imprint (see imprints photo). Nib shows a small scuff here and there and a scratch on one tine that has no effect on durability or performance. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel-end are deep and fully legible. A lovely writer and the first example of one of these I’ve ever offered. Price: $270 SOLD
 
8. c.1915 Parker 16 Overlay (gold-filled over BHR, button filler, 14k XF Wet Noodle nib). Measures 4 5/8" capped and 6” posted. While Waterman overlays of this period aren't particularly common, they're far more numerous than their Parker counterparts today. Parker overlays like this one were commissioned to the George W. Heath company in New York, who is credited for some of the finer overlays on early Watermans and Conklins as well. The gold-filled filigree over this black hard rubber ringtop features an exquisitely hand-engraved Art Nouveau pattern as well as an indicia on the barrel for engraving. The pattern is the earlier, more intricate design that's more sought after than the simpler Art Deco pattern of the later 1910s-20s. Barrel overlay is stamped "Parker Fountain Pen" along with patent dates from 1891 and 1905. Pen has an Xmas tree, Lucky Curve feed and knurled blindcap unscrews to reveal brass button for filling. To fill, one simply unscrews the blind cap, submerses the nib, and depresses the brass button once. The fine workmanship of this pen is complemented by an early 14k Lucky Curve #3 nib, a scarce “Lazy S” variant with long tines. The nib is a Wet Noodle with softness, variation, and flow comparable to that of a dip pen nib. It lays down a smooth and consistent XF line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.5mm) under minimal pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Another nib with astonishingly responsive snap-back giving it a precision feel and you maximum control over the line. Together with its thin hairlines and reliable flow over its full range of flex, this makes for an ideal choice for calligraphic writing styles. Condition: excellent+ [B+]. Overlay shows no brassing, dents, or other notable flaws aside from some pin-sized dings confined to the knurled portion around the top of the cap. Hard rubber retains its dark black color with scarcely any fading. Knurling of blind cap isn’t quite as sharp as it once was and number stamp on barrel-end is faint but legible under bright light. Manufacturer imprint on barrel is deep and fully legible. Price: $380 SOLD
 
 
 
Shipping: Pens purchased on the weekend are mailed on Tuesday. Otherwise they are mailed within 2 business days of payment. All pens that do not come with their original boxes are packaged in PVC or thick plastic tubes to protect them in transit. To CONUS locations the following shipping options are available:

• USPS First-Class with tracking for $5 Due to the delivery delays that continue under postmaster general DeJoy, I strongly recommend that the Priority shipping option be chosen. All packages will include full insurance (covered by me). Rest assured that a full refund is guaranteed (issued through Paypal) in the event of a lost parcel and you will not have to wait until I receive a reimbursement from the USPS.
  
• USPS Priority with tracking for $9
  

International Customers: Please contact me for shipping quote if located abroad (delivery confirmation required). (Note: due to the issues stated above, my international shipping options are currently limited. PM for more info). Please do not ask me to commit mail fraud by altering the declared value of a pen for customs. Not only am I registered as a business but shipping insurance is based on declared value.
New York Customers: For tax purposes, I am now required to add an 8% sales tax on any sale made in the state of NY. If your shipping address is in NY state, please let me know before payment to receive an adjusted total. Discounted shipping is included for NY State residents to help defray the extra cost.
Ordering: Pens are placed on hold for the first person to reply to the thread and PM me with firm request to purchase (no chat DMs please). A request with the words “I'd like to purchase [pen number]” would be best to avoid confusion), to which I’ll reply with payment details. Please note that a message inquiring into a price discount does not suffice to place a pen on hold. If I haven't received Paypal payment within 24 hrs after a hold is placed, then pen(s) may become available to the next person.
Payment, & Guarantee: Payment by Paypal only. All pens are guaranteed to be in the condition in which I've described them. If I've missed something objectionable or the filling mechanism is not fully functional, the buyer may contact me up to 7 days after receiving the pen for a full refund (issued once I receive the pen back in the same condition as sold). Buyer must ship the return no later than 2 weeks after it was delivered to receive a refund. I've sold pens online for over a decade. Please check my past listings here as well as on the classifieds and historical sales forums on FPN (username: Estragon) and FPGeeks (popcod) for some of my previous offerings.
 
 
OTHER OPEN LISTINGS

• Vintage Montegrappa Extra Edacoto
  
• Waterman Nurse’s Sets
  
• Off-Catalogue Sheaffer Stubby Balance Lifetime
  
• Psychedelic Bayard Excselsior
  
• Waterman Taperite Citation
  
• Conklin Enduras, Nozac
  

Hi all,
I have a 6lb, 8 year-old Brussels Griffon who has had stomach sensitivities his whole life.
The food (and brand) he has been eating for several years (Castor & Pollux Organix Chicken & Rice) has recently been discontinued and so we’ve switched to Just Food For Dogs Chicken & Rice.
Twice in the past two weeks he’s had what seems to be bad cases of gas, with very loud stomach gurgling causing him to lose his appetite, walk backwards in pain etc. until he’s able to get it out. The poops are somewhat normal (soft but not diarrhea) and in the case of today (the second occurrence) he’s eaten, but I’m at a loss as to what the source could be and how to help him :(
Because he’s had similar stomach issues (4-5x per year) in the past we have Cerenia and depending on the severity of the issue, we will use it to help settle him. I haven’t given it to him today.
I experimented with some probiotics the week before his last similar situation (last week) - Visbiome and then Proviable capsules when the Vis ran out and he seemed to work well with the paste, so tried the other - and I thought they might have something to do with his issues, but seven days later and without them, he’s having the same issue - though thankfully more mild.
He eats two main meals a day with several “snacks” of his food throughout day, adding up the suggested portion from JFFD. At the moment he eats nothing other than his food. When he’s feeling better, he’ll have the occasional blueberry, carrot, or apple piece, but he never eats human food and we watch him like hawks on the street/in our kitchen - he never gets into anything that could give him garbage gut. He drinks a small amount of water per day and gets a bit more in his food.
For reference, he does not have IBD (though he has had raised bile levels in the past), hasn’t ever had pancreatitis with these issues, no parasites etc.
He is on Omeprazole for his suspected COMS and Pentoxifyline for Vasculitis (which we are weaning him off of as his ear margin hair has grown back.) He was on Colbalequin for borderline B12 deficiency but he hasn’t had it for a week to limit the medicines he’s on. He does take Glandex as well. Preventatives are Vectra3D and Interceptor.
A big note here is that he loves to lick (primarily his parents), and is definitely taking in a lot of excess air…
Given his case and history, what would you all recommend moving forward?
I would love to continue a good/ideally organic food regimen but he was on hydrolized protein in the past and it seemed to work for him - should we switch back?
How can we help mitigate the gas? Massaging him seems to help but ideally he wouldn’t have it at all!
Anything stand out we should change? I would do anything for this little guy.
Thank you so much for your help and all that you all do for our little guys!

Hi everyone! I thought it would be fun to compile a list of clothing brands that tend to offer colors in your season- if this is a thing. I’m trying to apply SCA to shopping/creating a capsule wardrobe and I like the idea of streamlining the shopping experience by curating a few trusted brands.
I’ll start:
Free People and FP Beach often have a ton of options for autumn seasons.
Eileen Fisher feels like it consistently skews autumn or spring.
Madewell often has a variety of clothes to suit soft seasons.

Zack didn’t know why, but the hair on the back of his neck stood on end at the sight of his door knob. The eerieness of his near-empty room left a pit in his stomach and in seeing the doorknob that he hadn’t seen for years, suddenly jolted hidden or repressed memories of his youth. Times he would run from his bullies in the foster home Zack once lived in, now, this old building is being condemned and due to be demolished tomorrow. Zack can’t look away from the doorknob, the rust-covered bulb reminded him of his old life as a foster kid and being more of an outcast with the other kids in this house, Fists and insults would fly freely towards Zack daily, none more willing to be Zacks number one bully, Donny. Zack feels the palms of his hands start to sweat and the air around him completely conceals Zack in a fog of forgotten moments in his life here that he long wished had never come back. Hurtful moments… terrible moments…moments in this very room that Zack was slowly reliving in his mind, yet it felt as if it was happening in front of him. Beads of cold sweat stink Zack's eyes, forcing his eyes closed and rubbing them to help with the sting, to no avail. Zack didn’t feel like himself in this room, this place is as a time capsule for Zack. He was only holding terrible anxiety that had recently just been unearthed inside Zack and bringing with it, a long-buried trauma that Zack was not ready for.
The room itself felt darker to Zack and his eyelids fluttered to adjust to the new dim surroundings, A small beam of light broke through a crevice between some wooden planks blocking out most light from outside. The shaft lands solely on the doorknob, the old rustic metal seems to not exist and shines abnormally bright from the beam of light; Zack covers his eyes from the sudden flash and when looking about finds the room back to its original state all those years ago. “No this can’t be right” Zack rubs his eyes and looks back around to only see the room still as it was back then. Zack hears sounds that haven’t been heard around here for a long time, kids playing outside in the backyard. Zack walks slowly, very curious and at the same time nervous, not fulling understanding what is happening now. Looking through the window that was just covered in old wooden planks that were nailed shut, were now clear of all obstacles, revealing the source of the noise. Showing kids he remembered back when he was a kid here. All of them playing and yet he’d also be up here, away from the other kids, away from the insults and shame that the kids always brought for Zack. Zack gets a swift memory jolt again and remembers this day, he was standing right here when he saw Donny and his group of twerp friends messing around the yard as the others just tried to have fun playing kid games. Donny had his eye on the one person who showed Zack kindness here; Clair was tending to her patch of sunflowers she had been looking after ever since she came here. The boys around Donny watched as she watered them, all by herself, Donny took this opening to make his move on her. I couldn’t hear what was said, but it didn’t look like she was interested in his offer, this made Donny mad and his friends chuckled at his sudden rejection and fueled his anger more. She then got up and waved them all goodbye as she turned back and looked up at the window I was standing at. She then smiles and waves at Zack, but Zack gets confused and waves back at the past through the window. Donny huffs and looks up to the window as well and stares hate-filled daggers at me. Even a pre-teen that was the bane of my life here can still drive a familiar chill down Zack’s spine as Zack quickly drops his hand behind him and is frozen in fear.
The room is back to the eerie silence as before and the darkness creeps around Zack again as he backs up from the window slowly. Zack steps against the wooden floorboards don’t make a single sound, the cold sweat returns, falling from his forehead onto the dusty, dry wood under his feet, Zack wipes his forehead with a trembling hand and moves his gaze toward the door, thinking he needs to leave this room immediately but in reaching for the doorknob, it refused to turn, it was as if it was merely a prop, not turn even possible to turn it at all.”Oh no…what is going on with this door” Zack began to the knob hard and struggle with it, to no success, and Zack's annoyance, he took a second to calm himself and closed his eyes, and breathed in slowly. As it began to take effect and Zack’s heart returned to a normal rhythm, bangs from the door and the knob violently turned left and right. Zack jumped at the sudden crashing on the door, the banging and twisting of the doorknob Zack didn’t know what to do, just then A smaller hand reached out and held his trembling hand as the calming voice of a bygone friend to Zack heard; “It’s ok Zack” the phantom voice whispered in his ear, the violent crashing and splintering of the door in front of him sounded so muffed from the smooth, tunes of the voice, that it almost seemed nonexistent at the moment.” Donny likes to play rough Zack but I won’t let him pick on you anymore, ok”. Zack felt a warm sensation on his left cheek and even though he felt a hand in his, he was all alone in the room, the door was at the moment of burst but stopped as the room grew dark and still. The feeling of a friendly presence was gone and Zack felt the horror that he had always known his whole life.
The feeling of being utterly alone, and with the sense covering him like a thick weighted blanket, his eyes look again to the door knob. The single light beam falls back into sight of Zack, bringing him back to the present, the darkness engulfing Zack, matching the despair that covers him. Zack takes a moment to regain himself and steady his rapid heart rate before he is fit. The silence of the room was helpful for Zack to focus on slowing the pounding against his rib cage, The sudden rush of his rash past was something he was not thinking would be an issue, yet here he was, nearly having a panic attack in his old foster room. Zack’s eyes are closed, breathing in slowly through the nose and out the mouth. The Silence is then shattered by the sound of the rustic doorknob violently twisting left and right as if someone on the other side was trying their hardest to get the door open. Zack jumps at the sudden old doorknob twist in such a manner, and knowing that he is the only one left in this building, gives Zack pause to go towards the door in the first place. The doorknob popped and grind against itself on the turns Zack felt the person might just rip the worn knob off the door entirely. Zack’s mind wanted to reach out for the vibrating doorknob, yet he found his feet moving on their own, moving back slowly from the door.
A golf ball-sized lump of fear sat in the back of Zack’s throat; His fear of coming not just from the crazy moving doorknob, but now the voices Zack remembers hearing at a younger age. When running from Donny and locking the doorknob, holding back my tears, and shaking behind a closet door. Donny would beat on the door and nearly a few times rip the doorknob off the door of the room itself. One night Zack was talking with Clair and felt a tear come down his cheek, She knew Donny was the one behind all my troubles and had had her misdealings with his consent pursuits since we got around our teens, but she remained ever so kind to Zack.
Zack swallows that lump down his throat and whence at the door to the closest repeatedly banging and the doorknob loosening from the screws at this point, Zack decides to reach for the door and open it. Maybe it was blind fear, or maybe Zack decided to overcome whatever this place’s hold had of him and may still have. Zack's hands trembled as he reached a tentative hand towards the closest door and with each step a glimpse of a forgotten tragedy began to form inside Zack’s mind, images that flashed like a long picture book of some well-drawn sketch. Right footsteps first, as the moment of Clair and Zack hugging one another as young adults now, Zack had a bruise under his right eye and Clair was putting ice and tending to him. Something else was happening there. A second step; Clair and Zack's hands touched and a spark was ignited that was set the moment they first met. Zack returns with a light cruise of Clair's cheek and then they both share a lover's kiss, until now as Zack has this remembrance does he now know that Donny was watching this from outside through the window above that we proudly sat at and the kiss was on display. Only Donny was the only one there to see and he was not happy at all. Rage filled his eyes not because Clair wasn’t with him, but because she chose Zack over him. The third step and another, were the times after Zack felt happiest in the arms of Clair and she was happy in his. Just then a violent slam from Donny to the door to the room swung open with such force the shock of the noise scared Clair and Zack, Donny stood in that doorway with fire in his eyes and still…very still.
Zack feels the tips of his fingers reach the jerking doorknob and can’t understand the feeling that has overcome him here, but he is compelled to see this to the end. A final step and Zack places a hand on the knob and grips it, expecting the shake in his hand. No such thing, the door stopped pounding and the knob ceased its upheaval at Zack’s touch. Zack takes a huge breath and turns the doorknob. Nothing…No sound. No light. Empty and damp, say for a metal hook on the center back wall, stained with old, dry blood. Zack looks at it as if he can see it through the pitch black of the closet, then a hand grasps hold of Zack’s, and Zack gets a feeling of a female next to him but can’t see, any words or sounds of any kind yet Zack can’t help but see the hook and think back, back to that last moment with Clair, the kiss and the rage of Donny’s pain reaching us here. Donny in a fit of blind anger grabbed Clair by the hair and kicked Zack in the chest so that it nearly crushed his ribs in one blow. Screams from Clair for Donny to slop, but Donny does not do any such thing. He pulled her with him as he shoved Zack with his kick again, hard enough to land Zack into the broom closet of the room. Zack got up and almost hit his head on the jagged metal hook. Clair scratches Donny good in the face and Donny, In the attack Donny throws Clair from his grip, and Clair trips over lifted out of the rug, and crashes through the glass window facing outside. Zack and Donny are in a moment of frozen shock as the lifeless body of Clair lies mangled from the fall and the glass cutting her Donny then turns to Zack and tries to close the closet door on Zack and it is a struggle for both but eventually, Donny took a step back and then with a hard kick to the door, send Zack backward.
Zack is back in the dark closet and the room makes Zack feel alone and scared, like so many times before. A single tear forms and before it falls, a soft hand, gently wipes it away.
.

Sharing my breast explant, no capsulectonomy experience. This thread is to explicity discuss and answer any questions for individuals considering the explant procedure without capsulectomy. I am more than happy to answer any pre/post-op questions you may have!
Hi all! 😃
I had my breast explanted today (3/15/24) without capsulectomy, 6.5 hours post-op, and so far, so good! It is one of the best decisions I have made and regretted having the breast implants most of the time. It now literally feels the huge weight lifted off my chest and can breathe deeper. The brain fog I had since the implants were installed over 8 years ago have decreased substantially. The head clarity after a few hours post-op is incredible, this itself confirms that I have made the right decision removing the implants. 🥹
It was a personal choice to do the explant without capsulectomy and have considered the pros and cons of all options. I am fully aware that the BII community strongly advises removing the capsules and I know the advice are with good intentions, but kindly refrain from leaving comments stating I should have removed the capsules and soliciting capsulectomy/en bloc advise. Some folks are only interested with just a simple explant and their decisions are to be respected. I encourage everyone to do their research/be informed with all explant methods and make their own decisions before proceeding any procedure they choose to do.
Please feel free to ask questions. If anyone is interested on the pre/post-op progress, I am more than happy to share the details. ☺️
UPDATE (3/16/24, Day 1 post-op): Woke up with no pain, did not take a single tylenol today! Brain fog continuing to improve, the head clarity has improved compared to yesterday, joint and muscle pain decreased, neck and shoulder pain gone, and so much energy!!
Some additional information: - 39 years old - 132 lbs, 5'5" - Original breast size 34C - Implant size 34DD, 400cc's - Mentor smooth high-profile silicones - Impants were installed in December 2015 (over 8 years ago) - Explant without capsulectomy cost: slightly over $8,000 CAD (Calgary, AB, Canada), under general anesthesia - No lift, no fat transfer - The pain is currently 3/5, I'll see in a couple days if it increases. I am thinking to just take Tylenol extra strength for pain management. - Capsules are soft, thin, no capsular contracture issues. - Some BII symptoms experienced while having implants (brain fog, joint and muscle pain, vertigo, hair loss, constant neck shoulder tension, occasional heart palpitations at night, insomnia, occasional shortness of breath, certain food intolerances developed, ringing of ears, and blurred vision). - After the surgery, some the indicated BII symptoms indicated above have decreased (specifically the brain fog, joint and muscle pain, constant neck shoulder tension, ringing of ears). I am hopefully the remaining symptoms will resolve with time. Fingers crossed! 🤞

First / Previous / Royal Road / Patreon (Read 12 Chapters Ahead)

When dawn broke, the two of them set off again, once more heading north. Pale had made sure to call down another pod once the sun had risen, this one full of winter gear for the two of them – thermal jackets to keep them warm, but more importantly, snow-print camouflage covers for them to throw over themselves if they needed to creep around at night.
"What's the point of this stuff?" Kayla asked as she threw one of the snow-colored smocks over herself, pausing only to tug at it in a few places.
"Makes it harder for them to spot us," Pale explained. "Of course, some degree of combat is inevitable, but that's no reason to not avoid it if we can do so."
Pale zipped up her winter jacket, then reached for her shotgun, topping it off with fresh shells of buckshot. Kayla watched with fascination as Pale slid red-colored shell after red-colored shell into her weapon's magazine tube, finally furrowing her brow in confusion.
"How does it work?"
"Hm?" Pale asked, looking over to her. "You mean my weapons?"
"Yes. I thought you said your people couldn't use magic?"
"We can't. This is pure science." She held up a shotgun shell for emphasis. "To put it simply, my weapon works by setting off a chain reaction of burning chemicals and small explosions, which forces metal projectiles down a carefully-shaped and machined piece of metal at a very high rate of speed."
"But… it's so small. Why does it do so much damage?"
"Because of something called physics. Kinetic energy is determined by a combination of mass and velocity, but between the two, velocity has a much more profound impact on the energy itself. Essentially, you want to make a projectile more powerful? Make it go faster rather than just make it heavier."
Kayla hesitated. "My head's already starting to spin…"
"I will spare you any further explanation, then." Pale slung her weapon across her front, then did a quick gear check to make sure everything was stowed where it needed to be. Once that was done, she nodded over to Kayla. "Lead the way."
The two of them took off at a brisk march through the plains. Snow had started to fall as they had woken up, covering the area in a thin sheet of white that crunched underfoot with every step taken. Neither girl felt the effects of the elements thanks to their new winter gear, but it did make traversing through the plains a bit more difficult, not to mention that as the snow continued to fall, their movement would only be more impeded with time.
And just as well, there was the matter of the tracks they were leaving behind as they walked. Pale wasn't quite sure how to deal with those, at least not yet, but they would cross that particular bridge when they came to it.
As they walked, Pale noticed Kayla had become oddly silent. She blinked, then turned towards her, only to find her staring off into space as they advanced, watching the snow fall down on the terrain below. Pale cleared her throat, and Kayla jumped a bit before turning to face her.
"Yes?"
"Are you feeling okay?" Pale bluntly asked.
"Why do you ask?"
"Because you look awful. Is it the nightmares again?"
Kayla bit her lip, but ultimately nodded. "...Yeah, it is."
Pale's brow furrowed. Unfortunately for both of them, she was no psychologist. It was clear Kayla was going through some sort of trauma regarding the events of the past few days, and while Pale had archives of books related to the subject stored in her data banks, even she knew better than to go poking around in someone's head.
The human brain may have been mapped, but there were still things about it that even her creators didn't quite understand, and the nature of mental illness was one of them. She had already tried to logic Kayla out of whatever mental hole she'd fallen into, and that clearly hadn't worked. No, there was something deeper going on with her, something that Pale didn't understand.
Part of her wished Evie was still here, if only because she seemed to get it a lot better than Pale could.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Pale offered.
"Do you think that will help?"
"Has to be better than letting it fester like this. But if you're not willing, I won't push the issue."
Kayla shook her head. "It's just… I don't know how people do it. I still feel like I'm gonna vomit whenever I see a dead body lying on the ground. How you and Evie are able to not only keep going after that but add more to the pile is… frightening."
"Death is inherently frightening for everyone, even me."
"Truly?" Kayla asked, surprised. "You're afraid of death?"
"Yes, in multiple different ways." Pale gestured to herself. "This body, for one – I worry about losing it, because if that happens, I am going to be stuck floating listlessly through space, stuck in Sjel's orbit until my systems finally burn themselves out after several million years. Then my consciousness will fade away into nothingness, and there will be no remnant of me left behind aside from a shattered husk of a warship. Then again, perhaps that is the fate of every warship – the oceans back on my creators' home planet are, after all, filled with the dessicated husks of once-proud ships of war, many still sealed up like time capsules. I must admit, it would be poetic if I were to join them."
"No, it wouldn't," Kayla countered. "It'd be sad, Pale. You'd just float endlessly through space for the rest of time."
"Not quite. After a few billion years, this solar system's sun would burn out and turn into a supernova, wiping any trace of it from the face of the galaxy. But I understand what you're saying. My point, however, is that death is profound for everyone, even me."
"Why wouldn't it be profound for you?"
"Because I am not alive."
"Yes, you are."
Pale's brow furrowed. "I am not an organic person."
Wordlessly, Kayla reached out and poked her in the shoulder. "Weird, because you certainly feel organic."
"Not what I meant. I was created in a laboratory."
"So? Do you have any idea how many people were created from a drunken romp between an adventurer and a tavern wench? Is being made in a laboratory, whatever that means, really any more inauthentic than a loveless one-night stand that happened to lead to a baby?"
Pale opened her mouth, but Kayla beat her to the punch. "I don't understand why you keep trying to make this point. You are a person, Pale, and-"
"I cannot be a person," Pale growled. "That was not the purpose I was created for. And besides, this conversation isn't about me, it's about you. Stop trying to change the subject."
Kayla grunted, then crossed her arms as she walked. "Fine. You want to talk about what's bothering me? Now you know. I hate the knowledge that what I'm doing is leading to people being hurt and killed. I hate that Evie decided to help us, and made herself and her caravan a target as a result. And most importantly, I hate that it's all so necessary, because if we don't do this, I'll never see my father again. There, happy now?" Kayla crossed her arms, then let out a tired sigh. "I want to go home, but I can't even do that – not only is my father still missing, but my home is gone. I have nothing to go back to. Any friends I had are dead now..."
Kayla let out a small sniffle, and Pale hesitated before reaching out and resting a hand on her shoulder.
"I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't mean to make you feel like this. I understand that you're going through a lot, I just wish there was more I could do to help."
"You're here," Kayla insisted. "And you're helping me get my father back. That's more than enough. The rest… I'll deal with that on my own for now, I guess."
"Very well. But if you need someone to vent to, I'm here."
Kayla sniffled again, but gave her a thin, grateful smile. "Thank you."
Pale let her hand fall off Kayla's shoulder, and Kayla took a breath to calm herself before they continued on.
–
They walked for several more hours, the snow intensifying all around them before it finally came to be too much. By this time, the plains had given way to hills and rocky mountains capped with snow. Pale paused to examine their surroundings as they climbed a hill, looking for shelter.
"We must be getting farther north," she surmised. "The weather is becoming unrecognizable from how it was back in your village."
"You're right about that," Kayla grunted as she scrambled over some rocks. "Shouldn't be much longer now until we get to the sea. How we're going to cross without a boat, though… I suppose we'll have to figure that out on our own."
Pale nodded. "I am surprised that we haven't run into any opposition yet."
"I've had us staying away from the nearby towns on purpose. I figured that if we were going to run into anyone hostile, it'd be there."
"Smart move," Pale complimented. "And I take it that keeping us out in the open fields for as long as possible was part of that, too? Good thinking."
"Thanks," Kayla replied. She looked around the mountain, her gaze finally landing on an outcropping of rocks. "I think I see a cave over there. Think it'd make for good shelter for a night?"
"It'd be better than staying out in the open. Come on, I'll lead the way this time."
–
A short while later, both girls were sprawled out inside the cave, their outer layers of clothing hung up on some nearby rocks to air dry. Their thermal under layers kept them warm, as did a small fire Kayla had managed to start using her magic. They both sat huddled around the fire, a set of military rations perched in their laps.
"It'll be hot, so be careful when you open it," Pale warned. "The flameless ration heater included in each may use water to function, but trust me, the food will come out hot despite that."
"What'd you say this one was, again?" Kayla asked, examining the bag.
"Chicken and rice bowl. It should be a lot better than the earlier emergency ration bar I gave you – less artificial, at least – and unlike that one, you can eat this one in one sitting without any ill effects."
Kayla perked up a bit at that. "That sounds nice…"
They both fell silent after that, the only noise filling the cave being the crackling of the fire. Finally, Kayla broke the silence.
"
I just want you to know… I'm glad you're here with me," she said softly. "And not just because you're helping me find my father, either. You're a good person, Pale."
"I am-"
"I know, I know – you don't agree with being called a person. But you are."
Pale's brow furrowed. "No offense, but perhaps this is a difference of culture. How does one define a person on this world?"
"A person is anyone who has a sjel," Kayla answered.
"Then I do not fit the definition."
"Everyone has a sjel, Pale," Kayla softly emphasized. "Even you. Even if you can't use magic, I know you've still got one. And I'll do whatever it takes to make you realize that."
Again, silence fell over the two of them. It didn't last, however – from outside, Pale heard the unmistakable sound of far-away voices, and sat up straight. Judging from how Kayla's wolf ears perked up, she'd heard them, too.
"Look alive," Pale said, putting her ration aside and reaching for her shotgun.
"I think we're about to have company."

Special thanks to my good friend and co-writer, Ickbard for the help with writing this story.

I posted about this awhile back and did not get much response but I am gaslighting myself and need people who have gone through this or similar to help me be objective.
I will Try to keep this brief but it's a lot.
-long history of stricturing Crohn's of terminal ileum diagnosed in 2006. First resection Sept 2018, Last resection in April 2022. Surgeon told me he found Crohn's high up in small bowel, could not remove safely, hoped new biologic (Stelara) would take care of it.
-6 month delay in starting Stelara due to GI F up (forgot to send preauthorization)
-July 2022 began having severe upper gastric pain (under ribs and belly button) after even the smallest amount of food, followed by severe nausea and often vomiting. Within half hour multiple liquid BM's undigested food and insane amount of fluid. Began to eat less and less, moved to soft diet, and finally to complete liquids in August 2023
-July 2023-Oct 2023- Weight loss of 20 lbs over 3 month period. Many ER visits needed for rehydration and IV anti emetics and pain meds as could not keep down any oral meds. GI did colonoscopy but only found microscopic Crohn's in anastomosis site (he only took 2 biopsies from that area and nowhere else). CT's done in hospital showed thickening of wall of ascending colon, and collapsed bowel, free fluid in peritoneum. GI dismissed as "not reliable". Fecal Cal slightly elevated. Constant low grade anemia. After 4th ER visit in Oct 2023 they did a high res Ultrasound and I was admitted by surgery department. However, as I was urgent but not emergent, there were no beds available. Was given choice of staying in ER and receiving IV steroids, or going home and following up with GI. Chose home and was given Entocort. Entocort slowed down bowel from 30-50 bm's a day to ten. Did not help pain, nausea, vomiting, lack of ability to eat. After several desperate emails where I begged for help, said I wanted to die-GI ordered urgent MRI, would not change meds or give prednisone without "proof".
-November 2023-Began to experience fatigue like never before. Could hardly keep eyes open. This would be followed by severe upper gastric pain, nausea, vomiting and diarrhea that went on for days, followed by constipation for 1-2 days and severe bloating, only on the left side of belly which would be rock hard and hot to the touch. Then the diarrhea cycle woud begin again. Always pure liquid, sometimes black, always tons of mucous.
-Went to Mexico to visit my parents for the holidays where I usually feel better but still could not eat. Injecting myself with IM Gravol (anti emetic) just to keep fluids down. I lived off of chicken broth with rice. Saw GI in private hospital. Ordered full workup. Blood found in stool. 3 D CT ordered (could not find a vein for IV after 5 nurses, two doctors, and a radiologist with a vein finder so only had oral contrast) showed inflammation in small bowel, thickening of the ascending colon wall 11 mm, and inflammation of ileum. He wanted to send me to special IBD hospital in Mexico City for MRI but it would have cost 2500$ so I decided to wait till I got home to Canada where it would be free. Treated me with antibiotics for IBS (only available in Mexico and Germany) Zero improvement. I lived off of electrolyte drinks.
-Jan 29th 2024 returned to hospital because I could not keep any oral meds in (pills would be in toilet) also pain was 9/10, high fever, vomiting. Admitted again, but no beds. Left AMA with another prescription for Entocort.
-Feb 12 2024- High fever followed by two days of 40 plus liquid BM's, some of them bloody, all of them black. Husband insisted back to ER where I was admitted immediately. Cortisol levels 11 (close to adrenal failure) very low potassium. Doc said if we'd waited I likely would have died from heart event. Spent 8 + weeks in hospital having every kind of test imaginable. NOTHING showed on MRI, inflammation on CT, lower scope clear, upper endoscopy showed inflammation in esophagus, stomach, and duodenum. Negative for H Pylori, negative for celiac. Started on 150 mg of hydrocortisone for low cortisol to rescue my organs. MRI of brain showed small tumour on pituitary. Endocrinologist did ACTH test and was unhappy, kept me on 40 mg of hydrocortisone IV. PICC line insertion went awry when they Discovered I had complete stenosis of veins and needed port catheter surgically implanted. Was on TPN for 5 weeks. Needed pain meds and anti emetics every 4 hours or severe vomiting and diarrhea would ensue. 30-50 liquid bm's continued (they made me write down everything I ingested and every time I had a BM. They tested me for everything. No blood, NO CDiff, no parasites, no infection. High fever 104.5 plus delirium and CRP shot up to 50. Continued Anemia, blood work all over the place, even with TPN I needed potassium and sodium boluses 3 times a day.
-Requested pill endoscopy, GI said no Crohn's, no need for test. Suggested psych evaluation for a fucking eating disorder. Endocrinologist disagreed, said starvation and whatever disease process was causing symptoms was causing my cortisol issue. Psych diagnosed medical PTSD and generalized anxiety disorder (no shit) but NO eating disorder. Fired GI and hired IBD specialist from another city. Re ran all tests, CT showed huge diverticulum on duodenum otherwise clear. Was going to be moved to a ward from a private room. Had a panic attack because I could not share a bathroom and was not about to use a commode. Asked to be discharged after nearly 9 weeks. They were so overcrowded and basically did not know what else to do to help me, so they let me go even though I was still on TPN and NPO. Got a 5 minute instruction on how to insert a butterfly catheter for pain meds, and let go.
-Present-3 weeks later, still on liquid diet, (Boost drinks, blended oatmeal, yoghurt and soup) still on sub q and IM meds. Finally got new IBD doc to order capsule endoscopy and is treating me for SIBO (never been tested) plus set me up with nutritionist and psychologist for support. MRI repeated- totally clear.
I FEEL CRAZY. This is the sickest I have ever felt. It's been almost a year since I chewed food. The pain under my ribs just to the left of my belly button is now constant, whether I eat or not, pain meds barely take the edge off. Sometimes it's so intense I can hardly breathe. I keep passing out on the toilet. I projectile vomit daily, even using Gravol and Pantoprozole, the bile acid is awful. I've been doing tons of research and have learned that GDC and Jejunal Crohn's are extremely hard to diagnose. I have every single symptom and fit the criteria. Does this sound familiar to anyone????

~First~
(Got up Early to talk about the CPAP machine and such. Only to be given an appointment on friday. So yeah, in trying to solve a sleep issue I’m giving myself more of one. Incidentally Friday will be late due to well, the CPAP retrieval and tutorial)
The Pirates
“So, they’re here.” Agenda says contently as she finishes feeding her fussiest little girl.
“Yep!” Jingay chirps happily as her freshly hatched little children are happily playing on the glowing, shimmering platform that her rattle has brought to life. She can’t do anything complicated, but a soft shiny platform for her little slithers to play around in? She can do that, but it takes some focus. The tiny fluffy child of Vuni is cuddling the strong Jungle Nagasha tail that wraps around her own tail.
“How formal a call do you think we should make?” Miles asks in an amused tone.
“Not especially, after all the babes ensure it will never be properly formal, they’re too happy and healthy.” Agenda notes.
“I blame you for that.” Miles says and Agenda laughs.
“If you don’t want the blame I’ll take it.” Vuni remarks.
“You’re just as guilty.” Miles says and Vuni laughs in response.
“What’s going to happen?” Jingay asks and Miles is pensive for a moment.
“I don’t know.” He notes as his hand gently rubs the handle of his revolver. The constant rubbing had necessitated him re-burning the names of his family back into it. “But no amount of waffling about will let me know. So if you don’t mind. I’ve been... getting something a little ready.”
“Is this what you’ve been sneaking around to do for the last three days?” Agenda asks.
“Something like that. It’s a bit of a treat I wanted to give you girls so... care to join me?” He offers.
“What have you done?”
“Me and the boys got together a great big feast so that we can all talk The Inevitable at once. It took a bit of doing, but when the boys and I get moving, we really get moving.”
“Are you including Red Squadron and Biran in that?”
“And a lot of cadets too. Markus gave them a proper mission in setting up the area.” He says.
“How is that a mission?”
“It involves deploying a military force to secure and prepare an area for higher ranking officers to approach and remain there for a time.” Miles says before offering his hand. “There’s plenty of space for all our little ones, and for all our allies. Give them all a big impression. How does that sound?”
“Well, if you’ve been planning this for days.”
“I have. All of us have.”
“Then I suppose we HAVE to show up, don’t we?” Agenda says in a luxurious tone. “I’ll get my coat.”
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The hall that Miles leads them to is a massive refurbished hanger that has all kinds of carpets put down, tapestries hanging from the ceiling and tables upon tables of different treats of all sorts already out. The Undaunted Cadets are all rushing around putting down more meals and treats and between the richness of the carpets, the crystal bowls and platters and expensive drinks and foods. But the sort of... scrambled way it’s been put together by the cadets lends it an earnestness that bleeds through. More important though are numerous floating platforms where a child can be safely put down and be right beside their parent.
“Oh this is a treat. I haven’t even been one of you guys for long!” A four part harmony says as Moira walks in with little Liǔ Shù napping in the arms of the four bodies that didn’t speak. The toxic little girl not only has numerous of the protective pendents on her and woven into her clothing, but is in a dark jumper that lets her bright skin stand out as if for presentation.
“Well, as their novels say, all for one, and one for all.” A new voice says as a pair of Cannidors lead in their own family. More and more and more people pour in from all entrances, many in uniform, many of them her own girls. Some of them she barely recognizes. Every single one of them that notices her looking raises a glass, nods, salutes or somehow pays their respects to her.
Her little one squirms ever so and is softly comforted. For a moment there is almost a feeling of vertigo. There was a time where all this wasn’t even a dream of a dream. She could remember the feeling. How could she forget it? The sensation of something gripping your very mind and soul and stopping you from even thinking of disobeying. Then so long trying to get things right, trying to be in control of her own destiny, before finally achieving it and learning just how hard that was. How many sacrifices and concessions she made before what seemed to be one of her final concessions... turned out to be final in the best of ways.
“Alright! We have a connection to The Inevitable! Who wants to say hello to the next batch of humans in the galaxy?” Ryu calls out.
“My Lady?” Miles asks as he smiles up at her. She gives him a raised eyebrow at that.
“My lady is it? Well then, I better live up to it.” She says.
“Connect us!” She commands and there is a cheer through the room before a massive projector uses one of the tapestry covered walls as a screen. “Good Ship Inevitable! Can you hear me?”
“We can, you are on a friendly frequency.” A man of Asian Descent says sitting stiffly in his command chair. “I am Observer Wu, sent from Earth to conclusively determine what is going on outside our corner of the galaxy. Identify yourself please.”
“I am Duchess Agenda Lilpaw! I am the ruler of the Vucsa System an Undaunted World! I greet you, because I have long learned my lesson to stay on the good side of humans!”
“Have you now? If I’m not mistaken that is a fully grown human right next to you. You look like you could take him fairly easily.” Observer Wu says in an amused tone.
She looks down to Miles before shaking her head.
“I made that mistake once. My entire ship was not enough.” She says fondly before pulling him close. “Then I was offered a deal, and he used it to help make me a duchess. So you’ll forgive me if I think humans are a good thing to have around.”
“Did he now? I didn’t realize galactic conquest was the intent of The Dauntless and her crew.” Wu notes.
“Well, as one of the conquered, I would like to say I prefer this result. After all, being able to walk about the city without a bodyguard is a welcome change of pace.” Vuni says drawing attention to herself with a slight bow. “Ambassador Vuni Luxed at your service.”
“So this world prefers to be conquered?” Observer Wu asks.
“This world was a slum at it’s best. A hellscape at worst.” Mari Horny states as the Carib woman waves to the camera. “Mari Horny. I was here to witness it all. I’ve seen slaves freed, monsters hunted down no matter what kind of power or influence they have, be they person or beast. With them I’ve seen the children I worked so hard to protect grow stronger and thrive. Doom has come to this world time after time, and they met it each time. If you’re here to observe, then observe this room! Everyone here saved, aided or inspired by the people you’ve come to evaluate! There are ten pure blooded humans in this room, but beyond it is nearly a billion souls who will vouch for them from the first to last! And so will I!”
“No need to be so dramatic ma’am. I’m an observer, not a judge. I am here to see and hear without bias or illusions. Things are odd, and odd things have happened. The governments and officials back home need to understand clearly and without any doubt. So that is why I am here. There was confusion in the first message sent back. The second furthered the confusion due to multiple parties having separate interests. I have been tested, tried and guaranteed numerous concessions and payments for an utterly neutral perspective.”
“So your word is going to be how all is, then they decide if we committed treachery.” Franklin notes as he floats up with several bundles around him, many of them laughing. “Behold this then. My children. All healthy, with myself as the only human parent. My daughters take after their mothers, my son takes after me, but has his mother’s strength.”
“He is nearly transparent.” Observer Wu notes before Franklin gives the little boy a tickle and he flickers in and out of visibility while laughing. “Most interesting. This Vucsa world of yours, before I do my research upon it, is there something you would like to say about it?”
“This is a world on the edge of Wild Space. Which means that it’s often been used in the past as a place where experiments happened.” Miles says.
“Interesting. Such as?” Observer Wu asks.
“Such as my daughter here. I am Moira Octalliry, I will cut through the details and simply state that my anatomy allowed me to be experimented on a great deal.” She says and Observer Wu looks at her oddly.
“Are you one, or many?”
“I am one, but I am eight as one.” She says. “As is my daughter, I have named her Liǔ Shù. She was a piece of myself remade to produce a weapon. She and I were both rescued. I was forgotten in darkness for thousands of years, as was my daughter. Held in a single moment in time and left to rot.”
“And... is she a weapon?”
“I am told you have creatures similar to her new ability back on your homeworld.”
“We do? What is the name of this creature?”
“The Poison Dart Frog.” She says and Observer Wu’s eyebrows go up.
“Don’t forget about the fact that we fought off that robot witch!”
“Robot Witch?” Wu prompts.
“A weapon of war created by a very large, dangerous and expansive criminal family. A death robot known as Mother Massacre.” Moira says. “So consider that. Without them going... I don’t even know what to call it, I saw the contradicting orders, without them going sane for lack of a better term, I would still be in a slowly failing stasis capsule, buried and forgotten in the darkness.”
“And so, in summation, and from the mouths of those that clearly trust them what is your opinion of The Undaunted and the humans that make it up?”
“When I was brought to this world it was as a slave, my dignity ripped from me, my home destroyed and in less than a day I had my freedom, dignity and a new home.” One of the Erumenta that Agenda cannot recognize out of hand announces.
“And my own. My whole family, those that were enslaved are freed, those that were indoctrinated into that wretched way of life have been allowed time to recover.” Biran says grandly.
“They took me in.” A smaller voice says as Karim rises up. “I’m a Hlo’Shab. Death Born. I could have reasonably only expected to have my core shattered, or shunned for my entire life. Instead I have a home.”
“And... to be Death Born means what?”
“I am a Slohb. By blood I have only one true parent. I was broken off of them far too soon and they died as I survived. Death Born. Or... well, I don’t have blood but... you get the idea right?” Karim asks.
“I understand.” Observer Wu notes. “I have more calls incoming. Is there more from Vucsa for me to see or hear?”
“Over here!” A jubilant voice calls out and the room turns to see Hewhew standing on the shoulders of Heffer to tower over everyone with the Agela’s height added to his own. “Red Five calling it in! The Vucsa Defence Fleets fly fast and proud to keep our home safe!”
The crowd around him, pilots all, throw up their right arms and cheer along with Hewhew. “Welcome to the Galaxy Observer! We’re ten tons of awesome in a two pound bag! Let’s rock!”
Observer Wu smiles as he looks around. “I look forwards to discovering the truth of things.”
“That’s the fun part of the galaxy sir, it’s so absurd we don’t need to lie.” Miles states and Observer Wu turns back to him with a smirk.
“Well, we shall see, won’t we?” He asks. “Is there anything more?”
“I take it you’re not in the mood for a display of flight prowess? We’ve been working on a new routine.” Hewhew calls out.
“Perhaps later. I have numerous calls waiting.” Observer Wu states. “Now if you’ll excuse me...”
~First~ Last Next

It's mother's Day back in Canada and I'm thinking about mom today. I'm so sick though that I'll do a call tomorrow when I'm doing better. I tend to do poorly on phone calls when I'm not well. I woke up very ill this morning and my body did not want to cooperate at all. Who knew that biking a lot on a body trying to kick an illness might prolong said illness.
The rain indeed came and did not stop. It was pouring cats and dogs in the morning and the prospect of going outside in the rain while sick made me feel miserable. With my poor condition and the possibility of a thunderstorm during the day, we were in no condition to be going very far. We tried to extend our stay but the hotel was fully booked, our next best bet was to head up the road into the mountains and find a place there.
On my booking app, one hotel was listed at half it's usual price for some reason. We've stayed at a lot of livemax hotels and found them to at least be okay, so we figured it was safe to take the cheap option this time, which was $49. It was one of their onsen properties as well, and it looked like there was a train nearby if we wanted to get food and a bath in the next town over, which looked to be nicer. It was either that or pay another $100 for what would amount to a shelter from the rain, and in my addled state where sickness feels like a waste of time, a cheap hotel is a good way to convince me to stay put and rest. It was 20km away and the rain wasn't going to get any lighter, so we packed up, donned our rain gear, and set out for some breakfast.
A grocery store was near our hotel (which again was just a series of trailers in the parking lot of a casino), and we figured we could get something for breakfast there as nothing else was open on the way. Inside we found a store that was a bit of a time capsule. The music, the ambiance, even the too-cold air conditioning felt decades old. The aisles felt too large and there were large empty areas signalling that the store did not have enough business for it's size. The place was meticulously kept though, even if it was only one lonely cashier in the cavernous building. We found some hot coffee and had a few pastries while we talked about the economy of Japan and how the feeling here could relate to back home. Can anything be done with the general feeling of decline everywhere? Why were things so much better in Japan decades ago? Questions for economists, but not ones they necessarily have good answers for. I feel like many questions for economists are better suited for fortune tellers.
There were a couple of games in the grocery store which caught our eye, including a trio of games for kids (given the console was two feet off the ground), that were essentially slots. You pumped in coins to adjust your bet, then pressed a button to play a chance game, and if you won you got more coins. I have no idea how anyone thinks this kind of game is appropriate or ethical to have around children. No wonder this country has such a gambling problem.
The ride from Nikko to our hotel was calm and wet. The hill upwards was gentle enough that I didn't feel too exhausted, but I did feel like I was going to fall asleep on my bike if the coughing fits didn't take me down first. I really felt wretched today, the week and a half of being sick because I never took the downtime to get better is really catching up with me today. Make time for your body or your body will take it's time, I guess. The road followed a river in a steep gorge, the mountains rising up on either side. Everything was blanketed in thick trees, the slopes now too steep for most developments.
Nonetheless, little onsen towns were nestled into the cracks of the mountains here and there, but the decline of the area was impossible not to notice. While the odd resort was still shiny, it's clear the volume of travelers to the area has dwindled from lofty amounts many many years ago. This area felt harder hit than most we've been to, with half the buildings we saw being either abandoned or in a sorry state. Whole hotels empty, apartment blocks with the windows smashed in, shuttered storefronts. It's sad for the people who have called this area home for generations.
We got to our hotel without much of a plan, as I was too addled to think that far. We agreed that food was going to need to happen, and the onsen I wanted to see was in the town downhill from us. We decided the train was our best bet for parking our bikes while we waited to check in. The train station was nice, but looking at the departures board, the train only ran a handful of times per day, and we wouldn't get back till late in the evening. It also would cost us $30 each just to ride two stops there and back. Not going to work. Instead we went to one of the two places open during lunch.
The restaurant was cute with half a dozen tables and a dated but spotless interior. The ladies we saw clearly were a multigenerational family running the place, with a woman old enough that she couldn't stand up straight anymore still zooming around with tea and orders. Soaked, cold, and with nowhere to go, we brought our books and settled in to stay for awhile. The restaurant never got more than half full and we ordered several meals worth of food, drinks, and desserts, so we figured they wouldn't mind if we sat and quietly read our books. I got a yakiniku set meal and bryce got the karaage set, both were great but Bryce's karaage was especially good. We also got a cola float to share which was delightfully old fashioned but very tasty.
When it was finally time to check in at our hotel, my body was starting to act up. I think the cold and wet and tiredness was getting to me as some of my neurological issues flared up. Not a big deal, but had me a bit twitchy and in desperate need of a hot bath and rest. The hotel lobby was quite nice, but the rest of the place was as we expected; enormous, and falling apart, but working. Various walls and ceilings had water damage that was never going to be fixed, many many doors said "private" or "staff only" that looked to be old banquet halls. A lounge laid dark, never to have a singer again. We found a roof access, the roof patched many times by hand. An arcade with games that were at least 20 or 30 years old were still in working order, maintained as well as any other thing here. The private onsen was damaged beyond use, but the main public ones were functioning.
My onsen was in the basement, and the entrance area again had a huge lounge area that would never be used, and a bunch of other darkened areas that were curious but creeped me out. The bath was in a large room with tall windows and a big stone bath, a large rock wall being the main attraction. I spent some time soaking here till I watched some ladies walk out a different door. Monkeys were bumping on the windows, so I followed them where that went. It lead to three outdoor baths, one just a tub. The big bath overlooked the river and was quite lovely, clearly what was keeping this place afloat, so to speak. Again, really good value for $50 for the two of us.
After my bath, I got up and nearly passed out from the lack of blood pressure and immediately started feeling ill. I went back to the room, grabbed some water and got horizontal. The room is a rather spacious Japanese style room with tatami mats, but with soft beds. The AC works and we have a view of the river from the 6th floor. This place is great. Bryce had a great time soaking in his onsen, which also had outdoor baths and a sauna too. After he returned to the room we went down to the arcade to amuse ourselves before dinner.
As I mentioned the arcade contained some real antiques, pinball-ish games with carved wood channels, racing games with hand drawn art, slots that had real spinning wheels instead of just screens. Everything was also brutally difficult, also in keeping with the time period. Bryce got the high score on the alligator whack a mole game and also beat me 3 out of 3 on the drum game. Can't win em all.
We walked to the only other place in town for dinner, going into a creepy tunnel that went under the hotel. We eventually decided that the tunnel went straight to the kitchens and probably was used for deliveries at some point but now was full of junk and discarded kitchen equipment that was probably too difficult to get rid of. Every old or abandoned building we've seen is full to the brim with empty paint cans, old computers and dilapidated equipment. This stuff must cost a fortune to get rid of.
The restaurant we went to was another cute Japanese restaurant, this one with an older woman serving and a young man in the kitchen cooking. I got the house special udon and Bryce got karaage again. Maybe Bryce needs to branch out a bit. The udon meal was heavenly and wonderful on my sick body, lots of seafood, a hearty broth and chewy noodles. Easily the best udon I've ever had. We ordered extra karaage and a few drinks while we talked strategy for the next week of riding. Also, like the last place, we felt we could stay because they didn't have much business and we wanted to order more because of it. We stayed quite a while but nobody else came.
We decided to cut out a section of the north tour and head directly through the mountains to our port. We're feeling stressed about the end of the trip and want more leeway in case things go wrong and also more time in Hokkaido as we've heard good things. We'll miss out on Fukushima and Sendai and Morioka, but get to experience the internal mountain valleys of northern Japan. This feels like a decent move, as we've seen a lot of the coastal lowlands already and some highland adventures sounds good. Plus it gains us half a week in hokkaido which will allow us three or four days to prepare for our departure, which means lots of time to find gifts and other cool things to bring home.
Back in the hotel room, we're looking for a nice rest and an early start tomorrow. We have two options, a blistering 5 day tour with four 100km days, or a 7 day tour with 6 75km days. We're shooting for the latter. We'll attempt the big ride just after Sapporo. For now, I want to get healthy and enjoy the ride. Sleep tonight and tomorrow is a new day, hopefully I'll be healthy by then.