Repo, full episodes

full_episodes

2022.05.03 22:49 Kirby_and_mario_fan7 full_episodes

welcome do you have a phone? a laptop, tablet? anything that can run a streaming tv service but you don't have enough of that service? well come on down to the full episode. subreddit where you can find many genres of shows including drama, comedy, animation, family, etc
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2020.09.05 23:20 DevontePlayz FullEpisodesOfSB

Full episodes of the animated series SpongeBob SquarePants 1.Full Episodes of Spongebob Only 2. Flair your posts for the respective season 3. No NSFW/NSFL (Bannable Offense) 4. No links in posts All rights reserved to Nickelodeon and Viacom, created by Stephen Hillenberg. Please support the original broadcasts and releases. Protected by Fair Use (Commentary and Criticism)
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2022.10.14 21:53 gamerdude272738 FullEpisodesOfB_and_B

For full episodes of the animated series by Mike Judge,Beavis And Butthead
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2024.05.21 12:35 SaturnSplitJon 3rd and final part of the Korn Reviewed Podcast out now

Part 3 The Paradigm Shift- Requium is out now! The full 2 and half hour podcast will be out in a few days for anyone who wants to listen in full. That's it for now, we still have a lot of other songs, live albums and side projects to cover. Any other things you want us to cover let me know and please enjoy the podcast!
https://open.spotify.com/episode/4FhDmrzPAQuHPU2pYBXyhV?si=kFGf4RJUT8WCtgJfLpxVUA
submitted by SaturnSplitJon to Korn [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 12:11 THEGONKBONK [Review] The Male Lead is a Murderer Review: When a Killer Falls in Love With You (9/10)

[Review] The Male Lead is a Murderer Review: When a Killer Falls in Love With You (9/10)
GONKBONK REVIEWS: THE MALE LEAD IS A MURDERER
The Male Lead is a Murderer follows the tale between an author and the monster she created who falls in love with her. This webtoon, created by nana.maruse, mixes horror, romance, and crime into one captivating story that will hook you on every episode.
Read the full version of this review here.
Who is this for:
  • Readers who want an intriguing tale of romance and mystery
  • People who relate to Jullie as a writer and character
  • For those wanting a very easy binge-able read
Who this is not for:
  • People who don’t like yanderes
  • Readers who dislike characters falling for typical horror cliches
  • For those who don’t like violence, murder, blood, etc.
Review:
Even though it’s not the kind of romance story I typically read, I was intrigued by its twist on isekai tropes around the female lead being transported into a story she created in high school. Then with the webtoon’s male lead being a heartless murderer, that’s a recipe for an incredibly thrilling story.
Things change quickly when AmbeJullie meets Oliver. His introduction shifts the story’s tone from idyllic to something much darker. Their intriguing dynamic serves as the crux of many tense and complex interactions throughout the story. I think fans of yandere characters will find Oliver fascinating and oddly charming. The webtoon’s creator, nana.maruse, does a great job of making Oliver appealing through the eyes of AmbeJullie. Oliver’s character becomes interesting when you learn that he was made because of Amber’s negative feelings against her bullies in high school.
The characters and plot progression of The Male Lead is a Murderer are so good that I couldn’t help but binge through the entire series. This is a high recommendation from me. Plus, it’s finished! So you can binge-read it to the end if you want to. It’s a perfect romance webtoon with good amounts of horror and mystery to go with it.
IMAGE: TAPAS
submitted by THEGONKBONK to webtoons [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 12:09 OneGorilla [US][SELLING] **FREE SHIPPING** GTO 14 Days, Jack the Ripper, A Centaurs Life, Haganai, Steins Gate, Mysterious Underground Men, Not Lives, Franken Fran, Croquis Pop, Handa-Kun, Himouto Umaru-Chan, Afterschool Charisma, Abandoned Sacred Beast and many more series.

Hello all. Looking to offload a bunch of my manga. There’s both some OOP sets as well as some common series.
PLEASE NOTE…..
I AM NOT CURRENTLY LOOKING TO SPLIT SETS PLEASE DONT ASK FOR SPLITS.
ONLY US SHIPPING.
I AM OPEN TO OFFERS.
Full DISCLAIMER that I have not read any of these series. They have been bought either new or used and have been sitting on my bookcases this whole time. There is varying degrees of yellowing from series to series and volume to volume. Most have some degree of normal shelf wear. There may be ripped/marked pages or even missing pages (although I doubt it as most of the volumes as you’ll see in the pictures are in overall good to great condition).
They have been kept away from sunlight (blackout curtains on the bookcases) and my apartment is a non-smoking apartment.
All series have pictures of the series as a whole as well as what I can visually inspect and find anything on the outside of the volumes. PLEASE LOOK AT THE PICTURES TO SEE THE FULL CONDITION OF THE SERIES. If you need any clarification or more pictures of a series or a volume please let me know and I can get more pictures or clarify the extent of the damage if there is any.
All packages are shipped using Media Mail or whichever method is cheaper unless otherwise discussed for a different option. Any Package over $200 will have a signature required
I will ship these out as promptly as possible.
UPDATED TIMESTAMP https://imgur.com/a/6kmVDqF
MANGA FULL/PARTIAL SETS
GTO 14 Days in Shonan 1-9 $199: https://imgur.com/a/BDAxPLk
Tokyo ESP 1-8 $75.8: https://imgur.com/a/HLYaKIv
Jack the Ripper 1-5 $64: https://imgur.com/a/dAnXyNu
Doubt 1-2 (G3) $25.5: https://imgur.com/a/eCGFXh7
As Miss Beelzebub Likes 1-8 $77.3: https://imgur.com/a/d4SxSvF
Helvatica Standard Italic and Bold $25.5: https://imgur.com/a/0yVvc5a
Sickness Death 1-2: $22.5: https://imgur.com/a/DC5aY8C
Moteki 1-2: $31: https://imgur.com/a/owHeRFd
7th Garden 1-8: $55: https://imgur.com/a/vMDFKOS
Lament of the Lamb 1-5 $38.5: https://imgur.com/a/uJL4TWi
A Centaurs Life 1-16 $110.5: https://imgur.com/a/kEjlS3I
Not Lives 1-10 $54.8: https://imgur.com/a/9xHc3s3
Ultra man 1-3 $25.5: https://imgur.com/a/IxhKha3
Steins Gate 1-3 with volume 1 Loot Crate Ed: $73.9: https://imgur.com/a/ozbXByP
Cat Paradise 1-5 $48.8: https://imgur.com/a/C0NHRcS
Afterschool Charisma 1-12 $104.5: https://imgur.com/a/dqgSepT
Franken Fran Omnibus 1-4 $105: https://imgur.com/a/HUuzIyf
Croquis Pop 1-6 $59.3: https://imgur.com/a/9AAqQdd
Blue Dragon: Ral Grad 1-4 $40: https://imgur.com/a/OgXOTRi
Nora: The Last Chronicle 1-9 $65: https://imgur.com/a/z1gKt6K
Holy Corpse Rising 1-7 $68: https://imgur.com/a/0zMAmVL
Evergreen 1-4 $30.5: https://imgur.com/a/X4kHQJl
Tomodachi x Monster 1-3 $20.5: https://imgur.com/a/vgtS0OI
Clay Lord 1-3 $20.5: https://imgur.com/a/Iiglf8K
Die Wergelder 1-2 $30.5: https://imgur.com/a/j845ceF
Handa-Kun 1-7 $73: https://imgur.com/a/OzHnY01
Clockwork Planet manga 1-10 $99.9: https://imgur.com/a/RhTZ7UI
Himouto Umaru-Chan 1-10 $102: https://imgur.com/a/vxctepq
Immortal Hound 1-6 $57: https://imgur.com/a/mchdje7
Drifting Classroom singles 1-11 $235: https://imgur.com/a/ocIEFQj
To the Abandoned Sacred Beast 1-9 $68.4: https://imgur.com/a/drRKrM5
Zero Familiar Omnibus 1-3 $79.6: https://imgur.com/a/h8ZbSPk
Zero Familiar Chronicles 1-4 $30: https://imgur.com/a/VoJpHEY
Genshiken 1-9 $55: https://imgur.com/a/FYgcBNP
Nirvana 1-2 $14: https://imgur.com/a/iZM0Ykl
Arpeggio of Blue Steel 1-15 $210: https://imgur.com/a/jrZpjQa (ON HOLD)
Dragon Drive 1-14 $140: https://imgur.com/a/1vOAIAk
War World Blue 1-7 $39: https://imgur.com/a/S1EvMxf
Ancient Magus Bride 1-12 including special booklet $89.4: https://imgur.com/a/MZYOyrm
Grand Blue Dreaming 1-9 $81: https://imgur.com/a/ThkB6uR
Servamp 1-13 $143.3: https://imgur.com/a/eUmYvOr
Urusei Yatsura 1-7 $105: https://imgur.com/a/X1oFmkV
Devils and Realist 1-15 $192: https://imgur.com/a/HPygdtC
D-Frag 1-13 $195: https://imgur.com/a/LRu7jWN
Ajin Demi-Humans 1-14 $132: https://imgur.com/a/CWqqu76
Haganai 1-18 plus 50% more fails and Club Minutes $490: https://imgur.com/a/pe9miPe
Shield Hero Manga 1-4 $36: https://imgur.com/a/ngj3RO7
Delinquent Housewife 1-4 $38.4: https://imgur.com/a/JIX0eHj
H.P. Lovecraft At Mountains Madness 1-2 $28: https://imgur.com/a/otM8XMY
Kuma Miko 1-8 $72.6: https://imgur.com/a/gKwpXob
Yokai Rental Shop 1-4 $35: https://imgur.com/a/nV0ogZe
Ghost Diary 1-3 $26: https://imgur.com/a/LV4v7Hp
Didn’t I Say to Make My Abilities Average 1-3 $37: https://imgur.com/a/SGkl3be
Land of the Lustrous 1-9 $88.5: https://imgur.com/a/7XyfHzS
Emannon 1-3 $33: https://imgur.com/a/6Z1jkKp
LIGHT NOVELS FULL AND PARTIAL SETS
No Game No Life 1-10 97.3: https://imgur.com/a/6OIObXb
Goblin Slayer 1-9 $83.2: https://imgur.com/a/wLT1Yk6
Spice and Wolf LN 1-21 $231: https://imgur.com/a/h30MTQm
Wolf and Parchment 1-3 $33.5: https://imgur.com/a/6fhsX0P
Grimgar of Fantasy and Ash 1-13 $126.9: https://imgur.com/a/5ltzcKQ
Haruhi Suzumiya Hardcover Light Novel 1-11 $393: https://imgur.com/a/42QCvgn
Another Hardcover LN $21.7: https://imgur.com/a/UIiTYMu
Another Episode S/O HC LN $19.8: https://imgur.com/a/GX4YAg9
Pretty boy Detective Club LN 1-3 $31: https://imgur.com/a/xIE9M4p
Ancient Magus Bride Silver Yarn $9: https://imgur.com/a/DpBEsOB
Ancient Magus Bride Golden Yarn $9: https://imgur.com/a/Z56HdfE
SINGLE VOLUMES
The Mysterious Underground Men $95: https://imgur.com/a/xff7GkK
Haruhi Manga Anthology $16: https://imgur.com/a/B0xCET1
Another Omnibus Volume $20: https://imgur.com/a/GBOhHVF
Summer Wars $18: https://imgur.com/a/Fz3CWvq
Gantz (32,33, 35, 36 sold) 10, 12, (10 & 12 are ex library copies) 34 still available, SOLD INDIVIDUALLY NOT AS A SET. $45 for v34, 10 and 12 for $14 each: https://imgur.com/a/0ETgC1t
Dream Fossil $17.8: https://imgur.com/a/M4d07mD
She and Her Cat $10.5: https://imgur.com/a/ugTlUci
Venus in the Blind $19: https://imgur.com/a/hLuIyFJ
Scumbag Loser $16.5: https://imgur.com/a/FZuhHni
Ancient Magus Bride Supplement 1 $9: https://imgur.com/a/pqYAxti
Ancient Magus Bride Supplement 2 $9: https://imgur.com/a/aXYOknU
Ancient Magus Bride Merkmal Official Guide book $9: https://imgur.com/a/t26T7G3
Gigi Monster with slipcover $30: https://imgur.com/a/WpiNfNu
Maiden Railway $8: https://imgur.com/a/GzDKh4O
An Invitation from a Crab $10: https://imgur.com/a/t3UGJiE
A Girl on the Shore $11.5: https://imgur.com/a/EKbvRQY
PEZ $8: https://imgur.com/a/uUxTgZN
ARTBOOKS/ILLUSTRATIONS
Tokyo Ghoul are: Zakki $15: https://imgur.com/a/CoNXxX4
D.Gray Man Illustrations NOCHE $25: https://imgur.com/a/zot5KUc
The Art of My Neighbor Totoro $30: https://imgur.com/a/ECaDNkx
Otomo: $19: https://imgur.com/a/P5gPysl4
submitted by OneGorilla to mangaswap [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 11:30 HampurHampur My full review "The Shield". The best TV show of all times. Let's discuss [SPOILER]

I have already made short post that I finished series finale. I stiil feel sad, depressed and that feeling when tv show ended.... unbelievable how "The Shield" is stuck with me. Can't believe this journey is over.
I wanted to say so many things. Firstly, how can I miss this? I was too young when it came out, but I hear about "The Wire" everywhere even now. "The shield" feels like out of the radar all the time. WE MUST DO SOMETHING WITH IT! Please, just watch "The Shield"!
My friend told me to watch it and he stumbled upon this Tv show in one cool review that was left by some user (girl , actually) on my native language site about movies/tvshows.
When I look at some photos and pictures of "The Shield" I have thoughts that it is like CSI or some other typical cop show with nothing more. How wrong was I with such first impression.
What I really like that "The shield" has blu-ray release. So cool tv show is reinnovate for high quality format and has a lot of bonus features on blu-ray.
My friend also told me that I need to watch especially until Season 5 where it will be so high level quality writing that I gonna really appreaciate "The Shield".
As for myself, I fond of cinema. I just not go easy on any movies/tvshows. I am very nit-picking because I like to learn about cinematography, screenwriting, directing and so on. For me movies like the greatest art and I study movies as an art. That's why I feel bored about modern movies and TV shows. Screenplays are not bold, not so complex, characters feel flat and creators afraid to insult other races, woman right and so on. Many movies and TV shows of modern era feel convinient. I am tired of that. And I started to watch "The Shield" six months ago.
"The Shield" was aired in the right time! Year 2002 like "The Wire". From the pilot episode "The Shield" don't try to be convinient, it shows you what Vic and his team doing, what "The barn" doing everyday. Everything around characters feels not-convinient: drug-addicted, child trafficking, other awful staff around. Characters not just saint and clean, they do what they have to do like it or not as a viewer. That's what I wished for a long time. "The Shield" just clicked with me. I can't even imagine TVshow about cops can be on such level with great cast, great characters, really good screenwriting, directing and editing.
Before "The Shield" I can't tolerate semi-documentary cinematography and "hand-held" effect of camera in movies. In "The Shield" I fall in love with such camerawork and editing. That's really what I can't imagine I would love in cinemas. In this Tv show every take is so close, editiing beetwen close-mid plan camera panning and it feels so great in terms of "The Shield" storytellling. You are always near characters, you like breathing just around their shoulders and see every bad side of Farmington so close that you feel how disgusting this district is. Incredible work from cinematographers and editors.
Dynamic feeling of everything that happens on the screen. The greatest part of "The Shield" it is never trying to dragging some melodrama to extend seasons or try to be sentimental in the scenes. Modern TVshows really like that and i don't. Don't need to play with the viewer. In "The Shield" everything happenes so fast, so realistic that sometimes you can't even catch a breath. Not a single dull episode. In every episode something cool will definetely happens and it keeps you attached to the screen. And I don't mean that "The Shield" hasn't some melancholic or not-fast pacing moment. On the opposite, "The Shield" has everything what makes cinema alive and fascinating.
Let me explain what I really like about "The Shield" and I have never experience such different emotions just in one piece of the cinema:
In "The Shield" you can feel like a kid again and rooting for cool-masculine guys who breaks door and shout: "Police! On the ground!". After some episodes I really wanna just play in cops and criminals on my yard with friends. That's how action feels in this Tv show. I wanna buy merch with "Strike Team" on it and snake eating rat logo. Incredible.
In "The Shield" as an adult you can feel totally devastated by events that just happened on the screen. You can feel pure emotions from character actions. And what most important you don't want to judge character right away you want to put yourself in his shoes because what character did feels so realistic. Characters here not some fancy cards, you can feel them like real human beings.
In "The Shield" you can laugh as an adult. Humor in some scenes and from some characters really spot on and not stupid. It is full drama but some episodes has great humor parts. And again it feels so real and natural like human beings in real life would joke about something. Bilings sutuations and lines from later seasons are just pure gold.
In "The Shield" you want to discuss some parts of the story. It feels like after reading a good complex books with interesting characters you start to think about their actions and how you can think about your actions in the real life. What it is like to be a coward? To be hypocrite? What about loayalty and friendship? Trust me not so many movies/TVshows can be so full-thinking. It's a miracle that such depth can be in cop TV show. I stiil can't imagine how believable characters are and situations in "The Shield". Script and story of all seasons and how characters arcs redeemed is golden!
So I trying to say "The Shield" can feel like popcorn-blockbuster cop show in some parts with overacting but sometimes it's pure complex drama with silence scenes and great acting and very realistic characters. It's the best mixture of movie formula that I have seen in my life! I stiil can't imagine that I saying such words in terms of cop TV show.
"The Shield" was ahead of its time. It is a real piece of art. In modern days I want to see Tv show with overacting (when it need to be done), cool action and the same time it can provide me with great drama sequences and believable characters.
[SPOILER] section below. Please read only if you watched the series.
What I also like about "The Shield" it has great leading character. Michael Chiklis was born for this role. Maybe in first seasons you can think he overacting sometimes and can't be so dramatic but in the late seasons Michael have shown one of the best acting scenes in cinema. Pure mastery. This 42 second silence in front of Olivia was something unique and incredible. Then final eyes scene with Cloudette and finale running eyes scene in the ending of season 7 when he sits alone.
Vic is so well written in every season. He is the anchor of the show. So charismatic, strategy wise, musculine and cool and what I like the most this character feels real. When Vic came alone in gang territory and didn't fear anything you believe in that. You understand as a viewer that not anybody in "the barn" have balls for things that Mackey can do. He uses "shortcuts" in police work that only he can manage. He has really metal backbone. Even when he mentally broke at the end of the 1st season he needs just a couple of minutes to grab his shit together and go further. Character has a great amount of willpower and dedication to do anything that he wanted to.
Vic is the greatest anti hero in cinema history. Many side characters hate him but when there is a problem that no one can resolve Mackey step up. Farmington is so dirty that it needs people dirty as Vic to clean it.
I actually always rooted for Vic as a viewer because nobody in "The Shield" is black and white. Even Claudette free Kleavon from death penalty to keep her warm place. And I like that "The Shield" shows every character is corrupt somehow.
But I can't believe that Vic betrayed Ronnie. It hits hard. After that I as a viewer understood Cloudette words: "Vic is trying to be someone he wants you to see him". We viewers see Vic true nature in the final episode and it hits hard too. He always was like that and we didn't want to accept. And some part of me like him but other part can't forgive him for what he did to others. Such a great character downfall through all seasons. And this shot when he smiled to his gun and go somewhere. Where did he go? He can't sit tight he always need to be "living on the edge" this his type of character.
I wanna write about other characters. Shane for sure. But Post is too big. I leave it for later.
10/10. I am empty and depressed that "The Shield" journey ended for me. Can't believe that many people don't know about this masterpiece. I am glad I stumbled upon it. It touched my strings for cinema love that not any movie or tv show touching in years.
So many emotions and thoughts. Thanks to Shawn Ryan, Michael Chiklis, Walton Goggins and every other member of "The Shield" crew and FX. I wish I had a chance to tell it to them personally. I am grown man but I feel emotions like a kid again. Pure emotions from "The Shield" story.
To sum up my words. I like this ending montage of Season 2. It has great editing and you feel emotions. I literally cried when I rewatched it after the final. Clodette touches Dutch and thanked him. Aceveda moving forward. Coriine in thoughts. Dutch investigate a murder again. And Pile of money scene... Vic the only one who is laughing but others feel mix emotions. Gives shivers to my spine.
The Shield - Overcome Season 2 Ending (youtube.com)
submitted by HampurHampur to TheShield [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 11:27 omegaMKXIII 31 [M4F] Austria/Europe - Looking for my forever lady

General
I am looking for a lady between 28 and 35 years old, for a committed monogamous childfree relationship. My goal is to become a true team, supporting each other, caring for each other, nurturing each other and helping each other grow and realise our goals and dreams as much as possible. I'm hoping to find someone that values a relationship as much as I do and takes it seriously. It's not the only thing my life revolves around, but it's also not just something 'nice to have' for me.
I tried to be as concise as possible while still providing what details I think are crucial to know; I realise this post turned out very long, but I prefer those because I can get as good an idea as possible with detailed descriptions, bar actually talking to the person, and find that very valuable, so if that also applies to you, that would be awesome.
Basics
I am 186cm tall, slim/fit built, dark brown hair, brown eyes. Both my arms are tattooed (full sleeve), as are my calves and the areas above my ankles. Regarding pictures see below. I am a runner (ranging from 5k to full marathon), training multiple times a week. I'm also vegan. My love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation. While I am mostly securely attached, withdrawing from me triggers anxiety and I have made a horrible experience with a fearful avoidant partner in the past, so that is something I fear I cannot deal with again.
I am also an atheist.
I am a very warm, soft and sensitive person, I think I am humorous, I am self reflecting a lot and I can also be really passionate and romantic. Those are traits that also are really important to me in a woman.
I can be quite social, I am a good talker, but also love to listen to really get to know someone on a deeper level. I can enjoy an evening out with friends just as much as the silence of sitting at the shores of the river and watching the sunset in solitude (although I've been craving to watch it together with a partner for a really long time now). I can be out in a pub, at a rave, a metal show or in the stadium watching football and have the time of my life, but I cannot do these things every day; I need recharge time (on the sofa, in the woods for a run, a lazy Sunday staying in bed etc.). This should give you an idea; basically, I am a homebody that thoroughly enjoys going out in moderation.
I won't say too much about hobbies; suffice it to say I am into the dark, the obscure, the macabre, the occult, the mysterious, the erotic. It won't surprise you that I had a gothic phase in my youth, bonus points if you did too!
What I am looking for
Although similar hobbies and interests are a plus (and there have to be at least a couple things we have in common), emotional and sexual compatibility are more important to me. I am a very sensitive and emotional person (I do cry easily and by this point I don't think I'll ever be able to change that, sorry), so if you're too, we will definitely understand each other. I need someone who I can open up to (which I do rather quickly, anyway), be myself, bare my soul to and I need these things from you, too. I've had my share of emotionally unavailable women who were afraid of intimacy so I know I can't deal with that again because of the way how those things affect me. I am always emotionally invested with the woman I pursue and in those cases that was to my detriment. But my ability to feel so deep is also something I wouldn't want to change because as of yet, although it's getting harder, I haven't given up on finding someone.
With those emotional needs come two requirements that I found to be vital over the years: First, being able to be silly and cutesy together and to accept each other's inner child and care for it. I am not talking about having to deal with another person's immaturity or inability to perform basic adult skills, rather with the way sadness, hurt, anxiety and being overwhelmed manifests for me (and maybe for you, too?). I need someone who is able to comfort me, to hold me, to allow me to be weak and needy for a while until I've calmed down, and I'm more than ready to offer the same. Your inner child can come out for a while, no problem (: Also in a positive way: Thankfully, today everyone seems to be understanding of the cuteness overload cats (or any animal baby, really) can cause; I need that with a partner. I also still have plushies as comfort animals (some of which in quite a litteral sense as they make for really amazing pillows) and ideally, you do too.
There is a saying that in every relationship, one person is the stronger one. In the past, I have been with women who obviously were stronger than me, but that doesn't mean they always had to be strong, far from it. I certainly, like I said, need to be able to feel protected, but it's not like I'm a particularly needy partner, like everyone, I have my ups and downs, but I can pull my weight and have been told by past partners that I am very caring and that they felt safe and understood with me, and providing that for my partner is really important for me as well – this just to put the picture I'm (somewhat haphazardly) trying to paint into perspective.
Second, sexual compatibility. I have a high libido and I have kinks, so you should, too, in order that we can explore and enjoy them together. I found out how fulfilling living out those fantasies can be after years of never being able to try and in a relationship, sexual fulfillment for both partners is a must for me. Someone on here has coined the term 'filthy best friends and partners' which I have no shame to be stealing because it's such an apt description.
I'm looking for a balance between healthy independence and being emotionally present. A relationship where we 'get' each other; we're both each other's number one and treat each other like royalty. Where a disagreement leads to more intimacy between us as we understand better, not to resentment. Where we're comfortable baring our souls to each other, becoming a safe haven and secure base for each other. I don't like the modern notion that you 'should never feel too safe in a relationship' because that sounds like running from the mafia (and believe me, I love mafia movies); you should always put in effort, yes, but safety is one of the things I always want to experience and provide in a relationship. We shouldn't fear that a disagreement leads straight to breakup. I know ‘self-sufficiency’ is trending right now, but I feel like as partners, we’re partly responsible for each other and not our own but also each other’s happiness. Being dependant and dependable at the same time is important; making each other’s wellbeing a priority. I love the relationship model outlined in Stan Tatkin’s ‘Wired for Love’ and you should, too. If you’re not able to healthily depend on someone and their support while you’re having a hard time, look elsewhere. I know codependency is the latest thing everyone’s afraid of, but experiencing someone you’ve grown very attached to just bailing because they’re counterdependent and can’t stand working on themselves while simultaneously letting you in is something I’d rather not go through again. If I have to be afraid you’ll run at the first major problem that surfaces, even if it’s a ‘you’-problem, it’s not going to work. I think that all things can and need to be talked about. If you think ignoring someone for days is a form of communication, please look elsewhere. If you think’s it’s okay to lovebomb someone and then leave after a couple of months with the minimum amount of information and no proper conversation because you’re not ready to own up to what’s happening to you emotionally, please look elsewhere.
I am looking for someone real. We all have our problems, I don't want or need a 'perfect' person. You don't have everything figured out or 'all your shit' together. Be imperfect. Admit when you feel sad and angry, lonely, hopeless or even helpless – it's all relatable. Don't hide it. Be quirky, be dorky, be witchy, be opinionated, be yourself. Don't pretend.
I'm looking for someone to share romance with. Not great gestures, but small, meaningful ones. Poems for each other, expressing our feelings; cards with heartfelt messages that we put our perfume/cologne on, and a symbol that means something to us only, the print of your lips with lipstick, the way I sign and seal my letters for you.
Just as important to me is agreeing on living a healthy life, staying in shape both for ourselves and for each other, regularly working out and eating healthy. I am drug and disease-free and expect the same of you. I do drink as I love a good beer or glass of wine, rum or whiskey, but I've never really been drinking much and especially during the past year have further reduced it. One vice I have is that I enjoy a couple of cigars a year, but I can definitely accommodate you in this regard.
Another important point is aligned life goals: many childfree people seem to be adventurous, but that is a trait I don't associate with myself at all. I value safety more than adventure. I want to build a home together with my partner, a safespace for the both of us, where we always feel loved and protected, a place that we create together, make it cozy together so we just love to get back home there wherever we might have been, a home we decorate together for Halloween (my favourite holiday) or Christmas or Springtime, as we live in tune with the seasons, seeing them change around us, enjoying nature on a walk or the rain outside, reading in our cozy home. I value stability and harmony.
Appearance-wise, I am into ladies on the smaller side (albeit not regarding height), so I'm looking for someone petite/slim/skinny/healthy-fit. Likewise, I am not really muscular and don't have visible abs; like I said, I'm a runner, so if you're more into the gym-type, I'm not a good fit.
The natural progression for me would be to move from text to voice calls, videochat and then meeting up, all of that rather sooner than later. Not that there’s a need to rush anything, but having my heart broken because I already developed feelings due to a longer timeframe and then everything unexpectedly turning to shit is not something I want to have to live through again. I’d rather see earlier if we’re compatible or not; as someone who catches feelings fast I need to protect myself, I unfortunately had to learn that
Caveats/Possible red flags
If you're interested, feel free to message me and include some pictures of yourself and I will reply with my own. Have a nice day (:
submitted by omegaMKXIII to cf4cf [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 11:25 omegaMKXIII 31 [M4F] Austria/Europe - Looking for my forever lady

I am looking for a lady between 25 and 35 years old, for a committed monogamous childfree relationship. My goal is to become a true team, supporting each other, caring for each other, nurturing each other and helping each other grow and realise our goals and dreams as much as possible. I'm hoping to find someone that values a relationship as much as I do and takes it seriously. It's not the only thing my life revolves around, but it's also not just something 'nice to have' for me.
I am 186cm tall, slim/fit built, dark brown hair, brown eyes. Both my arms are tattooed (full sleeve), as are my calves and the areas above my ankles. Regarding pictures see below. I am a runner, training multiple times a week. I'm also vegan. My love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation. While I am mostly securely attached, withdrawing from me triggers anxiety and I have made a horrible experience with an avoidant partner in the past, so that is something I fear I cannot deal with again.
I am also an atheist.
I am a very warm, soft and sensitive person, I think I am humorous, I am self reflecting a lot and I can also be really passionate and romantic. Those are traits that also are really important to me in a woman.
I can be quite social, I am a good talker, but also love to listen to really get to know someone on a deeper level. I can enjoy an evening out with friends just as much as the silence of sitting at the shores of the river and watching the sunset in solitude (although I've been craving to watch it together with a partner for a really long time now). I can be out in a pub, at a rave, a metal show or at a football game and have the time of my life, but I cannot do these things every day; I need recharge time (on the sofa, in the woods for a run, a lazy Sunday staying in bed etc.). This should give you an idea; basically, I am a homebody that thoroughly enjoys going out in moderation.
I won't say too much about hobbies; suffice it to say I am into the dark, the obscure, the macabre, the occult, the mysterious, the erotic. It won't surprise you that I had a gothic phase in my youth, bonus points if you did too!
What I'm looking for
Although similar hobbies and interests are a plus, emotional and intimate compatibility are more important to me. I am a very sensitive and emotional person (I do cry easily and by this point I don't think I'll ever be able to change that, sorry), so if you're too, we will definitely understand each other. I need someone who I can open up to (which I do rather quickly, anyway), be myself, bare my soul to and I need these things from you, too. I've had my share of emotionally unavailable women who were afraid of intimacy so I know I can't deal with that again because of the way how those things affect me. I am always emotionally invested with the woman I pursue and in those cases that was to my detriment. But my ability to feel so deep is also something I wouldn't want to change because as of yet, although it's getting harder, I haven't given up on finding someone.
With those emotional needs come two requirements that I found to be vital over the years: First, being able to be silly and cutesy together and to accept each other's inner child and care for it. I am not talking about having to deal with another person's immaturity or inability to perform basic adult skills, rather with the way sadness, hurt, anxiety and being overwhelmed manifests for me (and maybe for you, too?). I need someone who is able to comfort me, to hold me, to allow me to be weak and needy for a while until I've calmed down, and I'm more than ready to offer the same. Your inner child can come out for a while, no problem (: Also in a positive way: Thankfully, today everyone seems to be understanding of the cuteness overload cats (or any animal baby, really) can cause; I need that with a partner. I also still have plushies as comfort animals and ideally, you do too.
Apparently in every relationship, one person is the stronger one. In the past, I have been with women who obviously were stronger than me, but that doesn't mean they always had to be strong, far from it. I certainly need to be able to feel protected, but it's not like I'm a particularly needy partner, like everyone, I have my ups and downs, but I can pull my weight and have been told by past partners that I am very caring and that they felt safe and understood with me, and providing that for my partner is really important for me as well.
Second, intimate compatibility. I am rather insatiable and love to experiment when it comes to the bedroom, so you should, too, in order that we can explore and enjoy together. I found out how fulfilling living out those fantasies can be after years of never being able to try and in a relationship, this kind of fulfillment for both partners is a must for me. I found the term 'filthy best friends and partners' to be a perfect description.
I'm looking for a balance between healthy independence and being emotionally present. A relationship where we 'get' each other; we're both each other's number one and treat each other like royalty. Where a disagreement leads to more intimacy between us as we understand better, not to resentment. Where we're comfortable baring our souls to each other, becoming a safe haven and secure base for each other. I don't like the modern notion that you 'should never feel too safe in a relationship' because that sounds like running from the mafia (and believe me, I love mafia movies); you should always put in effort, yes, but safety is one of the things I always want to experience and provide in a relationship. We shouldn't fear that a disagreement leads straight to breakup. I know ‘self-sufficiency’ is trending right now, but I feel like as partners, we’re partly responsible for each other and not our own but also each other’s happiness. Being dependant and dependable at the same time is important; making each other’s wellbeing a priority. If you’re not able to healthily depend on someone and their support while you’re having a hard time, look elsewhere. If I have to be afraid you’ll run at the first major problem that surfaces, even if it’s a ‘you’-problem, it’s not going to work. I think that all things can and need to be talked about. If you think ignoring someone for days is a form of communication, please look elsewhere.
I am looking for someone real. We all have our problems, I don't want or need a 'perfect' person. You don't have everything figured out or 'all your shit' together. Be imperfect. Admit when you feel sad and angry, lonely, hopeless or even helpless – it's all relatable. Don't hide it. Be quirky, be dorky, be witchy, opinionated, be yourself. Don't pretend.
I'm looking for someone to share romance with. Not great gestures, but small, meaningful ones. Poems for each other, expressing our feelings; cards with heartfelt messages that we put our perfume/cologne on, and a symbol that means something to us only, the print of your lips with lipstick, the way I sign and seal my letters for you.
Just as important to me is agreeing on living a healthy life, staying in shape both for ourselves and for each other, regularly working out and eating healthy. I am drug and disease-free and expect the same of you. I do drink as I love a good beer or glass of wine, rum or whiskey, but I've never really been drinking much and especially during the past year have further reduced it. One vice I have is that I enjoy a couple of cigars a year, but I can definitely accommodate you in this regard.
Another important point is aligned life goals: I value safety more than adventure. I want to build a home together with my partner, a safespace for the both of us, where we always feel loved and protected, a place that we create together, make it cozy together so we just love to get back home there wherever we might have been, a home we decorate together for Halloween (my favourite holiday) or Christmas or Springtime, as we live in tune with the seasons, enjoying nature on a walk or the rain outside, reading in our cozy home. I value stability and harmony.
Appearance-wise, I am into ladies on the smaller side), so I'm looking for someone petite/slim/skinny/healthy-fit. Likewise, I am not really muscular and don't have visible abs; like I said, I'm a runner, so if you're more into the gym-type, I'm not a good fit.
I’d prefer to move from text to voice calls, videochat and then meeting up, all of that rather sooner than later. Not that there’s a need to rush anything, but I’d rather see earlier if we’re compatible or not; as someone who catches feelings fast I need to protect myself.
Caveats
If you're interested, feel free to message me and include some pictures of yourself and I will reply with my own. Have a nice day (:
submitted by omegaMKXIII to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 11:16 mnchls Any way to watch older/archived episodes?

I'm specifically looking for bits featuring Conner O'Malley, like those interpretive dances he's done (wish I could find the Sopranos lesser-known Anniversary Guy entries or those Blacklist sketches he wrote and performed in alongside Amber, Lutz and Warheit.
I swear, finding full older episodes of any late night show seems just about impossible. I know the last two LNSM seasons are available on Peacock, and sometimes (only in a blue moon) I stumble across old clips on the NBC website that they haven't managed to take down, in addition to whatever they decided to keep up on YouTube. Even managed to track down scattered older episodes uploaded to the Internet Archive. But, still, there remain so many gaps.
Shot in the dark but—y'all got any leads on (ahem) other streaming options?
submitted by mnchls to sethmeyers [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 10:48 YaZainabYaZainab Rewatching the first episode

I just started watching the first episode again, and, oh my God, do I love this show. The 2000s party music is such vibes.
The jokes are hilarious.
Women keep telling Hank they like his shirt at this rager full of billionaires and he tells them he got it from Costco as they run off. Jill comments on his car being identical to hers and he says, “Yeah, they threw in the hubcaps, and I couldn’t say no.” WHEN APRIL CALLS EVAN’S DICK LITTLE😭 Hank tells Evan “You look like an Olympic summer swim Queeristan” that would never get on TV today. It’s hilarious how much they hate each other and what douchebags they are to each other compared to later seasons.
Evan is literally such a sleezeball. When he took a photo of April and hit on the teenage girls going in and Hank says “They’re not even old enough to vote”.
Edit: Divya yelling at her mom in the phone in Hindi😭
submitted by YaZainabYaZainab to royalpains [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 10:45 no_anybodies AIO to my dad's loudness?

on mobile. kind of cw for abuse
I (16M) am autistic. One of my symptoms is that I'm very sensitive to noise. The effect that loud noise has on me is kind of like physical pain in my ears and down my neck. Loud noises also cause me to have full body muscle spasms which are quite uncomfortable and painful. I live with my older siblings (23F, 21M) and both of my parents.
My dad is extremely loud. He's very into sports, especially football (soccer) and boxing, so he watches every game with my brother. When something happens in the game that they react to, they shout very loudly, either cheering or shouting out of anger. They watch TV on the opposite side of the house to me and I can still hear them over my own music or TV.
My dad also has a habit of shouting my name very loudly every time he sees me and holding it for about 30 seconds. Imagine someone going "Jamieeeeee" (not my real name) at top volume for a while. He does this every time he sees me without fail. If I tell him that he's being loud, he will talk in an equally as loud fake whisper and doesn't get the hint. In my mind, it feels like an equivalent to someone blasting a car horn at you for 30 seconds.
He's also just generally a loud person. He plays videos on his phone or computer on full volume, or shouts when he's excited or happy, or takes phone calls and talks on full volume no matter where he is in the house.
Though upsetting, I can cope with all of those things. However, he does some things that make this much more difficult.
My dad has a history of being abusive to my family. It's not physical (though it was before I was born) but he causes us a lot of distress. He gets blindingly angry over simple things and takes it out on everyone else. He will get angry over something like his phone being slow because he has every app open. When he's angry, he'll usually throw and break things. There have been multiple times when he will throw his phone out of anger and destroy it. He will punch his computer and shatter the monitor. I have to hide in my room or evacuate the house when this happens.
While he's doing this, he is shouting the entire time, at other people or just at whatever he's angry at. This means that when he shouts playfully, like when he sees me, it makes me panic because of the association with his anger.
It's worth noting that my older brother also has these kinds of anger episodes, however that's because he has special needs and turned to hard drugs to cope, leading to him having violent meltdowns. He has gotten better and has not had a violent spell for a while now, and is a loving older brother. However, the effect of his and my dad's meltdowns on my childhood has impacted me in many ways, including the sensitivity to men shouting no matter the context and the association with it to anger or danger. Add that to the autism and you get this.
The reason I think I might be overreacting is that, when I tell him or my mom that this bothers me, they tell me that it's his house too and he's free to use the space however he wants. My mom says that if he's loud, it means he's happy, and so I should let him be and let him express himself. My dad knows that I have autism and believes that supporting my needs will make me worse, and that putting up with it through exposure will get me used to the real world.
I agree that exposure can be good for me but I'd rather do it on my own terms. I want to come home and relax, not be shouted at until I can't leave my room out of sensitivity. I have my boundaries and I want him to respect them. However, I don't want to dictate what he can or can't do, and I don't want to start an argument.
I think it's reasonable to ask him to be quieter when I'm in the house, but he thinks I should be exposed to it to build up my tolerance and that my boundaries are an overreaction.
Am I overreacting to my dad's loudness?
submitted by no_anybodies to AmIOverreacting [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 10:21 KitMisKat51 Why haven't they made shuffle for streaming platforms??

I essentially want to watch as if I had turned on my tv to a random cable channel and could watch reruns of modern family or other shows with no particular order of the episodes. Even if it was just an option to watch the episodes of one show shuffled would be nice. I can't be the only one who's tired of having to either binge Modern Family in order or specifically go through and having to pick which episode to watch after finishing one. I suppose this is somewhat of a full-circle moment where I wish I could have cable instead of streaming!
submitted by KitMisKat51 to Modern_Family [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 10:01 FrontburnerBot May 21, 2024: Lessons for Canada from Europe’s housing fails

May 21, 2024
Europe has a reputation as a place that is generally ahead of the curve on things like social housing. So it might surprise some Canadians to learn that much of the EU is well into the throes of a full-blown housing affordability crisis — and the general patterns bear a striking resemblance to our own.


Senior Politico reporter Aitor Hernandez-Morales explains just how bad things are getting, and what we might learn from how it's unfolding.

You can listen to the episode on the web here.
submitted by FrontburnerBot to frontburner [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 09:47 mcm8279 [Opinion] SlashFilm: "Star Trek Changed My Life Forever And Reigns As The Greatest Sci-Fi Franchise Of All Time" "The crew of the Enterprise weren't "violent/cool," and I liked that. Finally, I realized, here was a show about pacifism - teaching intense lessons of diplomacy and leadership"

"I love "Star Trek" deeply because of its radical, aggressive optimism. It envisions a world, and a form of entertainment, that downplays conflict. Drama and power can come from elsewhere. The future, "Trek" always declared, was going to be populated by nerds, miracle tech, and egalitarianism. And what's so funny about peace, love, and understanding?"
Witney Seibold (SlashFilm)
Link:
https://www.slashfilm.com/1582617/star-trek-changed-my-life-forever-reigns-as-greatest-sci-fi-franchise-of-all-time/
Quotes:
"Like many Trekkies, I came to "Star Trek" at an early age. Throughout the 1980s, reruns of the original series would air on my local station (KCOP, channel 13 in Los Angeles), and they would serve as a periodic video backdrop to our dinnertimes. As a child, "Star Trek" was merely an action-light, horror-heavy sci-fi adventure series, and my older sister and I would gleefully yell out when Spock (Leonard Nimoy) performed his notorious Vulcan nerve pinch, or when Captain Kirk (William Shatner) got to snog an itinerant babe. We would hide our heads from the monster of the week; like many, I was terrified by the scowling face of Balok, the Ted Cassidy-voiced puppet alien from "The Corbomite Maneuver" (November 10, 1966).
Perhaps unusually for a child, I wasn't powerfully drawn to action, fights, or explosions in my entertainment. I would indeed watch the era's toyetic wartime cartoons like "Transformers" and "G.I. Joe," of course, but I didn't care deeply for the characters, nor have much invested in their dramatic stakes. I had trouble taking the "oorah" action seriously, perhaps already innately understanding that the cartoon soldiers were fictional and their triumphs were only temporary; what is the meaning of a victory when the bad guys will merely return the following week?
I only realized this in retrospect, but "Star Trek" was secretly providing an antidote to the breathless mayhem oozing from every pore of my generation's childhood entertainment. It was a series that, despite bad guys, monsters, and fights, was ultimately teaching intense lessons of diplomacy and leadership. The crew of the Enterprise weren't "violent/cool," and I liked that. Finally, I realized, here was a show about pacifism.
And, yes, "Star Trek" communicated themes of pacifism. It might have been a fluke of 1960s special effects budgets, but "Star Trek" rarely showed the USS Enterprise firing off its weapons or getting into full-scale starship battles. The common playground pop culture query of "who would win in a fight?" seemed churlish with "Star Trek." Would Kirk win in a fight with, say, Han Solo? Even as a wee bairn, I had to ask why Kirk and Han Solo would be fighting in the first place. I figured Spock would merely ask Han Solo about his ship while Kirk invited him in for a meal. Power, "Star Trek" argued, wasn't derived from one's ability to dominate and overwhelm others with tactics and weapons prowess, but to negotiate, adapt, and remain friendly.
[...]
Whether "Star Trek" taught me to be a pacifist or whether I was already a pacifist can be debated, but creator Gene Roddenberry and I were definitely on the same wavelength. "Star Trek" took place in a post-war universe at a time when humans had outgrown the need to kill each other for resources, and petty political grievances were a thing of the past.
[...]
Star Trek is for nerds, and that's a good thing
While it may be a cliché, I still maintain that "Star Trek" is for nerds. That is, I should hasten to add, a high compliment. With the release of "Next Generation," I was given my clearest, most refreshing draft of action-antidote. I began to realize that the rest of the American viewing public longed for conflict and war and action in their entertainment, with boys my age constantly raving about the latest 'splosion-fest that evoked the word "awesome."
Meanwhile, over on "Star Trek: The Next Generation," the universe had already graduated, moved into the stars, and gave up on action altogether. Oh sure, Commander Riker (Jonathan Frakes) was handy with a phaser, Worf (Michael Dorn) could murder you with a bat'leth, and the USS Enterprise-D needed to employ some sneaky battlefield tactics to outgun the Borg (or any number of other opponents), but one always got the sense that weapons and fights were a last-ditch tactic, a formality that must be seen through before an understanding could be reached. War was to be avoided at all costs.
What's more, there were classical references! Whenever Picard quoted Shakespeare, my heart would sing. By the time I turned 13 (when NextGen had just finished its fourth season), I too was getting into Shakespeare and Picard emerged as a teacher, a fictional professor that you didn't want to disappoint. I finally realized that the nerdy sci-fi technicalities of "Star Trek," along with its classical obsessions, workplace propriety, devotion to diplomacy, multicultural mindsets, and ability to brainstorm open-minded solutions to complex problems ... these were all aspirational states. Scoop in a few ethical dilemmas — racism, euthanasia, gender politics — and "Trek" gave me everything.
Star Trek obsession is healthy, actually
Like with the original series, the peacefulness of "Next Generation" could easily have been a product of its budget; without the money to stage massive phaser battles, fights and scrapes rarely rose above the skirmish level. This, by necessity, required the show to de-emphasize violence. The makers of "NextGen" also couldn't afford to visit alien worlds regularly, forcing them to shoot on the same six or seven sets week after week.
The limitations, however, allowed Trekkies to enjoy our time on board the Enterprise. "Star Trek" is, after all, a workplace drama above anything else, and we loved seeing the characters do their jobs on an day-to-day basis. We lived with the Enterprise crew long enough that we started to get a sense of how the ship worked. That, in turn, led directly into fantasies of living in "Star Trek," knowing we could operate the machinery if asked. It also didn't seem so terrible to live in a world that was devoted to science, peace, and diplomacy.
[...]
When J.J. Abrams' 2009 "Star Trek" reboot film came out, the franchise was altered to be one of the usual action flicks that "Trek" previously eschewed. It appealed to a mass audience. Conversations began as to what constituted "real Trek," leading directly into additional conversations about gatekeeping, fandom, and franchise evolution. Is "Star Trek" for nerds, or can it appeal to — for lack of a better term — jocks?
Conversations between Trekkies in the 1990s were impassioned, but rarely caustic (at least in my experience). In 2009, however, notions of fan toxicity were more openly acknowledged among pop obsessives, and people became angrier about their obsessions. All of a sudden, I was an "old school" Trekkie.
I was 31 and okay being "old school." After all, decades had passed since "Next Generation," a series that responded to Ronald Reagan and flourished during the 1990s. Why shouldn't it adjust again? I didn't like the franchise's actioned-up response to 9/11, but I was still happy to have debates as to what "Star Trek" meant and what modern action films communicated.
"Trek" taught me to negotiate ... about "Trek."
What Star Trek means today
I am on record with my feelings about the Paramount+ era of "Star Trek," and I have frequently been rather critical. I want to go on record, however, that my criticisms are not based in misplaced nostalgia, prejudicial hate against new "Star Trek," nor a gradually closing mind (an unfortunate affliction that can sometimes strike people rounding middle age). Indeed, I have liked a great deal of the "Star Trek" shows that have debuted since 2017. I think "Star Trek: Lower Decks" perfectly balances humor and irreverence with notable "Star Trek" themes of growth and maturity. "Lower Decks" is about lower-ranking officers who have the crappiest jobs on a Starfleet vessel, and struggle to grow up when they have a twentysomething's instincts toward laziness and bad decision-making. "Star Trek" is about adults, and "Lower Decks" sees people becoming adults.
Likewise, "Star Trek: Strange New Worlds" returns to an episodic structure, allowing for miniature dramas and handily-packaged morality plays to be presented more cleanly than the broad arcs of "Discovery" or "Picard." I only wince at "Star Trek" when it violates its own principles or lazily falls into action-based stories that (perhaps unwittingly) glorify combat, war, and aggression. And make no mistake, these kinds of stories were always part of the franchise; they didn't start in 2017.
I love "Star Trek" deeply because of its radical, aggressive optimism. It envisions a world, and a form of entertainment, that downplays conflict. Drama and power can come from elsewhere. The future, "Trek" always declared, was going to be populated by nerds, miracle tech, and egalitarianism. And what's so funny about peace, love, and understanding?
War was our awkward adolescence, "Trek" said, and our adulthood is in the stars."
Witney Seibold (SlashFilm)
Link:
https://www.slashfilm.com/1582617/star-trek-changed-my-life-forever-reigns-as-greatest-sci-fi-franchise-of-all-time/
submitted by mcm8279 to trektalk [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 09:27 dylan_1992 Terrance Howard on Joe Rogan says periodic table is wrong. X comments say science is full of lies.

Terrance Howard on Joe Rogan says periodic table is wrong. X comments say science is full of lies.
Terrance Howard, the actor in the first Iron Man, says that the period table is wrong. It shouldn’t be a grid, but circles as elements are organized in octaves and hertz.
Many comments on X are amazed, and know it must be true because he dreamt this up, and that science and Neil Degrasse Tyson are all lying because they’re the establisment and not able to to see.
These people are quite amazing…
submitted by dylan_1992 to facepalm [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 09:11 Traditional-Lynx-684 Findings from Latest Comprehensive Benchmark Study: GPT-4 Omni and 16 Other LLMs for NL to SQL Tasks - Results and Key Insights

Findings from Latest Comprehensive Benchmark Study: GPT-4 Omni and 16 Other LLMs for NL to SQL Tasks - Results and Key Insights
Our company Petavue is excited to share our latest benchmark report comparing the performance of the newest 17 LLMs (including GPT-4 Omni) across a variety of metrics including accuracy, cost, throughput, and latency for SQL generation use cases. This is the most comprehensive fully open-source benchmark to date. If you are looking to incorporate SQL in your AI stack, look no further.
Key Findings:
GPT-4 Omni outperforms in accuracy. Claude Opus is very close🎯: GPT-4 Omni has set new benchmarks for execution accuracy in NL-to-SQL tasks, leading with 41.44% on the challenging BIRD dataset. It outperforms predecessors like GPT-4 Turbo and competitors like Claude3-Opus, handling complex queries with better precision.
GPT-4 Omni outperforms on costs too 💸: Operating costs for GPT-4 Omni are half that of GPT-4 Turbo and just a quarter of Claude3 Opus, demonstrating outstanding performance alongside significant cost savings.
Model performance varies significantly with hosting platform 🚀: The same model on different platforms can yield significantly different results, underlining the importance of strategic selection to optimize efficiency and accuracy.
Mistral on Bedrock, Claude-Haiku offer best throughput 🔄: High throughput is noted in Mistral models on optimized platforms like Bedrock, while Claude3-Haiku offers a cost-effective, high-performance option without compromising accuracy, ideal for high-throughput scenarios.
Open AI models generated output with lower latency ⏱️: OpenAI's GPT models excel with the shortest time taken to produce outputs. GPT-3.5 features the lowest latency among them, while GPT-4 Omni operates at half the latency of GPT-4 Turbo, demonstrating good accuracy with speed.
Models when self-hosted are far more expensive than hosted on other platforms 💵: Models like Codellama70b, when self-hosted using base transformers, incur higher latency and, in turn, higher running costs compared to platforms like Anyscale. To reduce latency and costs, integrating inference engines and optimizations in self-hosted setups is crucial.
For the full codebase, test cases, and detailed report, check out our GitHub repo and full report 📊.
We encourage everyone to go through the findings and let us know your comments and insights.
https://preview.redd.it/0w4qyautbq1d1.png?width=807&format=png&auto=webp&s=4d853f99dab3f2156c807d75cd827064dc6d2f21
https://preview.redd.it/je780801cq1d1.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=740929bebfd9943237c2396ca03f6af618e3119e
https://preview.redd.it/j9h1s253cq1d1.png?width=558&format=png&auto=webp&s=762165b24028929f805bb7c32dcb2178de1ba098
submitted by Traditional-Lynx-684 to LocalLLaMA [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 08:57 hitmehardnsoft abandonment issues

does anyone know a healthy coping mechanism for perceived abandonment episodes? (minor vent) im on sertraline and therefore have a really really hard time crying but yesterday i was full on sobbing because i thought one of my best friends would leave me cus of something they said (looking back it's actually ridiculous) but now i still just feel like shit and keep it all inside. anyone know how to deal with this in a healthy way?
submitted by hitmehardnsoft to BPD [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 08:36 GenericUsername103 I'm so relieved that I've just been diagnosed with sleep apnea..here's my journey!

Around 8 months ago I noticed that I would wake up choking on nothing and my blood oxygen would drop to on average between 78% - 85% most nights. Apparently anything below 92% (according to my medical family) is a concern!
I got checked out by my GP and they suspected sleep apnea and sent me for a sleep study. When I had the study, I had barely slept due to another medical issue that resulted in me being in hospital so I was absolutely convinced that there wouldn't be enough data and I'd have to fight for another test.
I had my results appointment 6 months later and they actually caught it! I have mild/moderate sleep apnea. The frequency of the episodes each night is classed as mild, but when it does happen, my oxygen levels drop so low its classed as severe. (Although I do wonder if the frequency would be more had I slept for the full night...)
So now I'm waiting for an appointment so they can give me my CPAP machine and show me how to use it. I just feel so happy that everything makes sense!
My symptoms they have linked to sleep apnea are: Blood oxygen dropping each night Waking up frequently Waking up choking Falling asleep all the time Memory issues Snoring (although not too heavy) the second I go to sleep even when I'm laid on my side Waking up with headaches
Sorry for the happy rant, I am just so relieved!
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2024.05.21 08:27 Creative-Eggplant143 Halloween Episode with an Italian (?) Bellboy and Zombies.

Hello there!
I am looking for an Episode or a Sketch. I remember that it started with a full moon and a warning about zombies. There is a bellboy with a italian accent who keeps opening the door for the zombies that keep biting the other guest. I remember, that the guest was bittin in the hand and that the hand turns into a zombie and so on. I'm born in 97 so it must be a cartoon that aired around 2005-2010 in Germany. I dont know if it was Oggy and the Cockroaches or Ren and Stimpy or something completely different. Maybe you guys can help me.
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2024.05.21 08:19 Sin-God A New Chain; Snapshots

The familiar sounds of the office fill the ears of the "Adventurer" as he steps into his home away from home. To him "Familiar sounds" means the voices of about three-quarters of the hundreds of employees who work in this building, thanks to the progressive, passive, perpetual boosts to his senses that he has simply always been accruing. He still can't quite hear everything in the office, indeed as powerful as his senses are he can only actively sense enough space around him to be firmly aware of events occurring about half of the building's length and width away from him at a time, but those are still incredibly powerful senses.
Lucas steps past several cubicles and heads to his own with a calm smile on his face. He actually enjoys his job, not because he finds the work fulfilling but because it presents him with a chance to level up his skills and work towards becoming altogether stronger in a hilariously safe environment. The figure sits in his cubicle and logs into his work computer with a bright grin on his face. As he grabs the last pieces of paper in the backlog that was a big problem when he began to work for this company he feels a pang of pride.
The workday is pleasant enough. He successfully finishes the last pile of paperwork that was considered part of the backlog and this effort is celebrated by his direct supervisor and a few of the friends he's made in his department, a group composed of several men and only a few pair of women, who have been working here for years but lacked the abilities he possesses that allow him to grind out progress at a rapid rate and allow him to improve the work he does every single day without fail. The news quickly spreads throughout the office, and various people, including other departmental supervisors and managers, come to him and congratulate him.
When the day ends Lucas is one of the first people out the door. This is commonly expected Lucas-like behavior at this point so no one bats an eye at it. The figure works and then leaves, and he seems to have an incredibly strict policy about work-life balance to the point that no one from the office has seen his apartment or even seen him outside of the office aside from on social media.
The lad walks towards a nearby mall even as he checks his phone. When the decently cautious man is sure he's not being watched he uses his inventory to swap outfits, changing into something much more casual than his work uniform so he can do his equivalent of trolling. His clothes go from being the professional outfit someone might expect to see an accountant in, to the much more casual clothes of someone who works at a Game Station the local equivalent of a Game Stop.
The minute the figure reaches the mall he relaxes and steps into it with a smile on his face as he is suddenly and powerfully aware of events going on all around him now that the sounds he's been passively hearing for the last few minutes are not muffled by layers of solid American construction. The mall is a favorite haunt of his, a place where there are enough people that even if something goes awry he can pretty easily escape in the chaos and commotion that any sort of hostile actions would necessarily cause. Still, to the figure's credit he has not been caught yet.
The thief begins his training by carefully studying the department store he's in. He can be a bit bolder now than he could weeks ago, as in the time since he began to hone this skill he's enhanced it in such a way that he can teleport objects directly into his inventory, which is a tremendous improvement even if he can't take anything bigger or heavier than a cleaver. He eventually spots a teenager with a wallet that is just visible out of the corner of his pockets. Lucas diligently uses "Observe" on him and the powerful skill is strong enough now that Lucas can use it to determine someone's affiliations. When the young adult spots that the teen belongs to a gang he decides it's worth taking his potentially ill-gotten gains.
The clever trickster points a single finger in the direction of the teen's pocket and silently casts the handy spell. A thin line of energy lances out of his extended digit and sails through the air toward the teenager. When the teen begins to move Lucas hisses in annoyance and expends a bit more magical energy to take advantage of the first skill he's gained as a result of an attribute hitting 50: arcane manipulation.
Days ago the young adventurer's passion for magic and healing resulted in two classes leveling up on the same day: mage and white mage. This resulted in his intelligence going from 49 to 52, and as a result of that he gained the ability to manipulate magical energy, so long as he can detect the magic in question and is willing to spend some magic of his own. In this world, where the figure is reasonably certain that no other magical beings exist, this means that to hone this skill the wizard needs to manipulate his own magic. Still, that hasn't stopped the young professional from tirelessly doing just that.
With a significant amount of focus the mage is able to manipulate the thin beam and twists and turns it so that it circles around the teen before snaking into his pocket and striking the young gangster's wallet. When Lucas feels the wallet enter his inventory he chuckles and makes his way out of the department store. The rest of this particular bout of training is filled with similar feats of arcane finesse and hilariously minor acts that will steal from those willing to enact violence on others in exchange for money. Lucas's clever usage of his skills coupled with his willingness to act in stunningly petty and annoying ways make him great at harassing those he designates his foes. Lucas, lacking an ability to kill those he fights thanks to a drawback affecting him, has thus far refused to actually engage those he has marked as his foes in direct battle but his desire to annoy them has led to willingly target people associated with criminal groups with some of his spatial magic.
In hours the figure is back home and he is toying with the newest toy he's received from his gacha system. A guitar sits on his lap and he fiddles with the instrument, even he listens to a video about how to tune the thing. Lucas is experimenting with something, and behind the tablet he gained some time ago is a book that contains information on tuning guitars. The tablet is in use, recording what the man is up to. An app is in use and it records the sounds the guitar chords make. The self-taught musician relies on some of his new skills for this, as he has only recently gained the "Guitar" and "Guitar Maintenance" skills, and he got them at different times so they are different levels. Nonetheless, the figure patiently records himself, occasionally stopping the recording and examining it. He is diligently using his long-term planning skills and sticking to his broad plan. At the same time the figure patiently uses magic and steadily hones the "Mage" class, using his magic skills to farm multiple sources of experience while adhering to the schedule he has informally given himself.
Eventually the next day rolls around and the figure, predictably, gets out of his apartment and goes to work. If you had explained the concept of "Jumping" to Lucas a year ago and asked him if he thought so much of it would be just working a 9-5 job he'd not have believed you and yet in the context of his experience with the unusual profession a stunning amount of time has just been him being a regular employee of a perfectly mundane business.
Time continues to pass for the would-be adventurer at a steady pace. In this mundane world a figure with legitimate supernatural abilities is a uniquely powerful presence, and this is especially true of one that is determined to keep his head down and nose clean. Lucas's determination to live a regular, relatively risk-free life does not stop him from living, but it does stop him from suffering from some sort of "Middle School Second Year Syndrome" as a result of the fact that he has gained trainable superpowers. Instead of going mad with power or gaining an unhealthy mentality Lucas has just enough knowledge of how jumping works to know that while he might be a big fish in this world he is not a big fish in other worlds like Fallout, The Elder Scrolls, or even something as aggressively hostile and oppressive as the general setting of Minecraft is.
If an objective, impartial onlooker viewing Lucas's life is given the chance to describe the sort of "Television Show" that they are watching, they'd say it could easily be considered slice-of-life. For the first few months of his time here the most exciting times are the rare moments he adds something new to his slowly expanding list of activities and the even more slowly growing list of things he can do, such as when he begins to walk the streets of the city he lives in at night and cast healing, positive, restorative magic on the sleeping homeless people he encounters. This activity ultimately earns him the peculiar title of "Unsung Saint", a title which enhances the effectiveness of his restorative or otherwise beneficial magic on those not aware of the fact that he is using magic on them.
Days of work, training, and controlled, planned forays into new pastimes, turn into weeks of steady and anticipated progress. Weeks of steady and anticipated progress turn into months of upward mobility and the healthy establishments of new baseline feats. That said, eventually progress slows and becomes more difficult for the jumper in a world as relatively safe, for supernatural beings, as this one. It doesn't take terribly long for Lucas to go from a somewhat predictable, fairly focused figure who is very specialized in a number of areas, to a somewhat more well-rounded figure with a steadily increasing repository of skills and abilities, thanks to a subtle shift in growth strategies.
​Just a few days short of eleven months into his stay in this jump, the jumper is facing a new foe but is participating in an activity he's come to enjoy; sparring.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I dodge a well-aimed right-handed punch intended for my face, though thanks to my agility I easily had enough time to dodge it, It took a long time, from my viewpoint, for it to get close to me so long enough that I only let it get this close on purpose. I'm holding back in terms of my speed and strength but my opponent, a friend I made at the gym a few weeks ago, doesn't need to know that. I have way too many supernatural advantages for it to be a fair fight if I don't hold back.
I give my opponent enough time to register that I've dodged the blow before I begin to telegraph, purposefully, my next attack. I purposefully overextend my left arm and launch a powerful, but slow, strike. The man grits his teeth and moves to intercept my strike. He is fast enough to position his arm in front of it but that is still a mistake. I guide my blow into his arm and watch as he lets out a sincere, pained, grunt. Even with me holding back I still allow DPS to work its magic, and that perk coupled with both my trained and perk-enhanced strength is enough for me to deal him a decently powerful blow.
I retract my fist with a sly smile and note that the bars that cover my field of view are all going up at different rates. The bar for "Brawler", a class that's the result of "Fighter" giving me access to a new class when it hit level 10, my currently equipped class, is going up at a healthy clip as I spar with this man, as is the bar for "Precision Strikes" and "Acting", some of my skills. Most of the things going up at a decent clip are affected by "Jack of All Trades" a perk thatreduces the time and effort it takes for me to train up new skills to around the level of my average. Most of my other bars are only slightly going up, but this is acceptable. This sort of training is vital, long term, for my very survival, and thanks to my perks is pretty easy for me to do.
Behind me I hear a familiar voice cheering; Hannah's. The lovely redhead has begun to accompany me to the gym, but this is a somewhat recent development. Before a few weeks ago we only occasionally saw each other on Saturdays at the cafe she worked at, though we have been texting buddies ever since we met. Marcus, my sparring partner, grins savagely at me as he listens to my friend and gym buddy's cheers.
"I can't let you show me up in front of your girl, Lucas. We're not close like that." Marcus tells me, though the words are insincere. Marcus is a friend of mine, one who has even tasted my food, and that's something I don't let others do as much as I once did, barring people who go to the soup kitchen when I'm one of the volunteers on duty. My cooking can now do some decent stuff so I don't want to get anyone who isn't an ally or someone I need in my pocket overly reliant on my skills. I grin at the muscular bruiser of a warrior and dart back before gesturing for him to come at me like he means it. The man lets out a hearty laugh as he begins to pursue me. He is a touch taller than me and he has muscular, wide arms that take up a lot of space.
I watch, diligently, as he swings them at me when he is in the martial sweet spot of being close enough to hit me with a fully extended fist and being far enough away for me to strike back in an effort to preempt or counter his blow. I dart forward even as he stops advancing and duck underneath the strike before I use an active skill from my "Dancer" class to infuse my agility into my strength and hit him with a blow that disorients him. He steps back, a look of pain and confusion on his face as I step forward and move close enough to hit the man with a much softer blow to the chest. I feel his solid muscles block part of the harm done to him, but the blow is still solid enough that I watch his HP lower.
He gasps in pain and staggers back, and I smile at him and sense my triumph. He's only lost a small portion of his total hit points, but for normal people, one's total stock of HP is an abstraction of their physical health. For me, my HP serves as a skillful shield that protects me at all times, and for me to fall in battle someone has to whittle away my entire bar before they take me out. In fact, right now my HP is not maxed out; earlier I took a hit from Marcus that I'm still recovering from.
I take a step forward before Marcus signals that he needs a break. I laugh, the sound filling the part of the gym we're fighting in, and stop approaching the man. Hannah walks up to the ring and offers me some of her water as I walk toward one of the corners of the small ring. I silently gesture that I'll accept it and she tosses it at me. When the object is in my hand I use subtle telekinesis to mess with my boxing glove just enough to more easily hold onto the water bottle and sip from it. The cool water tastes good, and I smile as I feel it helping me relax as I wait to continue the fight. This is the sixth time I've beaten Marcus, but I'll give the man one bit of praise: he's persistent. He likes fighting enough that he is always eager to try and fight me, and I like fighting just enough to appreciate his resistance to the idea that I can beat him. It's not always easy for me to keep on finding partners that I can spar with.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
In the days that follow this fight, the young jumper continues to spar with Marcus. He steadily trains his "Brawler" class, and takes on class skills that do things like make him a more efficient hand-to-hand fighter, even gaining skills that he suspects, and hopes that he won't need here; like the ability to launch a punch that can inflict damage at a distance.
The figure's volunteering remains a steadfast facet of his in-jump identity. The man gains popularity throughout the place that is, functionally, his hometown, as he becomes a well-known volunteer. He even makes the places he volunteers at more popular, using a steadily increasing amount of local and online popularity to advocate for the organizations he supports. This first began to occur about three months into his stay in the jump, but he really begins to leverage it at the six month mark and he quickly begins to slowly become a minor force in the community, taking advantage of his heavy charisma build to sway hearts and minds to his cause.
His days at work continue to remain fairly unchanged from how they were at the start of his time in the jump, though on very rare occasions he creates reports and the in-jump equivalent of PowerPoint presentations about the data he has compiled to his supervisor. He has also overseen a day of service for members of his department to go and volunteer at the soup kitchen where he volunteered on the day he met Hannah, allowing him a pleasant chance to practice his leadership skills. He earns his first pay raise just under a year into his stay in this setting.
Minor missteps occur along the way, such as the figure overbooking himself during one particularly hectic weekend, which annoys his friends and fellow volunteers but serves as a decently humbling experience for the overly eager adventurer and also shows his friends that he is, ultimately, human.
Lucas continues his relaxed, fairly peaceful days for more and more time. By the time he has been in the jump for a full two years his pre-jump life feels like a memory or a strange dream, though this change to his state of mind does not actually mean he cannot recall such a time only that he has fully acclimated to the realities of being a jumper. At least as much as someone who is still on their first jump can acclimate to such a thing.
A/N: I like this episodic style for the necessary time skips that a standard (or mostly standard) jumpchain story will require. Now I'm gonna say that this style won't be universal across all jumps since some jumps may be better suited to shorter timeframes. Heck some more story-intensive jumps may benefit from longer focuses on individual events and sequences of events, but we've gone past the tutorial phase for this jump and I think minor episodic looks at broad timescales is better than a thousand chapter story that only hits one year in a jump and ultimately gets dropped. That said, I know that I'm not doing this style of writing PERFECTLY, so I hope that I can use this to grow as a writer and to become better able to convey how long time skips affect the characters, relationships, and strengths of the people involved over time. Still, if nothing else this was fun.
ALSO, as an author's note that is unique to the subreddit: this story is being published on Spacebattles and the white line that cuts through parts of the story indicates a narration/viewpoint shift. On Spacebattles and several other places I write there are in-built formatting options that allow you to cut through a textbox with a horizontal line which serves as a visual marker for some significant change to some aspect of the story. The line I made was my attempt to do that here on Reddit. It's... not perfect, but hey I'm trying.
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2024.05.21 07:40 Straight_Echidna_768 Tawog story au: pt.2

Bella is a black cat with white spots bully: starts getting scared and becomes Trumantized Bella: so excuse me I need to go *Gumball and Darwin goes to the library and looks in the computer and search's for elmore jr. High incidence and saw before it was Elmore junior high it self it was called in a different name and one day it burned down with fire and some actually died and one of them is named Benny a full black fur color and was born with a condition that she can't make emotion and she looked like Bella she was not related to her and it happened many years ago Darwin: oh my gosh I cannot what I'm hearing gumball: same dude don't you think she is..a.. reincarnation of Benny?! both gumball and Darwin: AHHHH!
(episode 3 is coming soon)
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2024.05.21 07:38 Fexxian What is this?

I've been getting left notes at my job, about how I don't keep up with things when I try my best to. My job is fashions and I'm the only closer for my department at night, there's 4 of them in the morning until mid afternoon. Even if I haven't been there in days, they would leave a note saying something is me. My boss apologized on behalf of them and claimed they were just upset because "it's not consistent and done well enough" when I know how to fold clothing and the line leader says I do a great job. I organize the racks, tables, do returns 3 times a day even if it meant I start to get a hypoglycemic episode. Some days to get everything done I work through it. To make matters worse I don't get recognized for any of my hard work for this company. But the three favorites in the morning do constantly. I rarely do it feels like. I'm not saying the note leavers are horrible people. But it hurts my feelings when i come in thinking I'm doing a good job and then I see that. What more can I do? I'm the only closer and I took on full time and I can get lots done but some days it's so busy that I can't get everything done. I always try my best, and most days I can do all my tasks and even swiffer the department.
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2024.05.21 07:35 jPatATL Woke AF ER Visit

I had been taking a variety of preworkouts for about 3-4 years, increasing the levels of potency as time ran on. 2 weeks ago I foolishly decided to stop cold turkey and change to a non-stim after a buddy of mine discovered his health was being severely affected by pre. The following days were met some awful caffeine withdrawl symptoms (Constant headache, mood swings, etc). Today I decided to take a full Woke AF scoop before lifting/cardio to see if I could kick the withdrawls and get back to feeling better. Lifting went very well and I was feeling back to "normal" in no time. 15min into my stairmaster workout I was met with extremely sharp chest pain over the heart and my heartrate shot up to about 190 combined with the feeling of almost passing out. These episodes of sharp pain and elevated Hpassing out happened a few more times before going to the ER where they diagnosed it as "Caffeine Poisoning". I believe ill be retiring from any stim pre and will be searching for a better personal alternative moving forward.
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2024.05.21 07:05 New-Truth-244 AIW for having intrusive sexual thoughts after my mothers death

All right Reddit here’s my entire can of worms I need help deciphering what to do about.
Backstory: I (25 F) found myself reconnecting with my (40 something M ) cousin when I moved an hour away from him in college. I thought he was the coolest person I ever saw when I was a kid and as a teen / young adult I noticed myself trying to seem extra cool around him and tbh felt a little funny about it. Like I was performing for his approval. More on this later.
Cut to a few years later and we are really good friends who see each other a few times a year and talk and text occasionally. This is very special to me bc my cousin on principal doesn’t talk to any other family member but me and I’m pretty much the same. We are two black sheep who found solace in each others company. I have fond memories of drinking and play wrestling and having late night chats in his house when his girlfriend and her kids were away.
To cut to the chase, my mom (his aunt) passed away suddenly this year, and my cousin dropped everything to be with me. This is when things started to get weird for me. I felt myself latch completely onto my cousin , which I assumed was the trauma bond instinct kicking in or maybe just one of my bipolar episodes making everything seem particularly intense even for the circumstances. However we did basically make a semi serious death pact that neither of us is going down or it would probably wreck the other one to the point of no return. The weeks following my mother‘s death were full of entire conversations like this one with my cousin on the phone late at night.
And then,slowly, as the title suggests, I began to have regular, intense, intrusive sexual thoughts about my cousin. Full on fantasies would play out in my mind and It felt insanely gross and shameful and I’d often be sick to my stomach if I dwelled on them for too long. But in past therapy I learned about letting intrusive thoughts pass by without freaking out about them so I just lived my life and hoped they would go away. They did not. The more time I spent with my cousin the more they began to ramp up.
About a month after my mom’s death, my cousin and I planned for me to retreat to his secluded cabin-like home for a week of grieving away from my school and work life. I wanted to runaway to the forest and cry and he offered his home for this purpose.
That week however turned to be insanely dramatic and we began to butt heads but quickly make up. Every night he’d get drunk and I’d get stoned and we’d fight over something stupid until he would eventually wrap me in his arms for hours until it was time to go to sleep and he’d carry me to bed.
The fights were brutal and he is very good at finding your weak spot and pointing it out to you , so often I’d find myself full of grief over my mother while also being emotionally wrecked by these fights and subsequent intense intimate moments.
It was a strange experience being pulled in so close then violently pushed away, but I’ve been in abusive relationships with men before so it felt normal until I’d tell people some of the ways we interacted. One example of this was after a fight he yanked my arms so I’d come lay on top of him on the couch and as I laid there he ran his hands down my back , waist, and sides and then told me he was trying NOT to be weird but my “apparently huge tits” were in the way.
So I’m like … cool I’m trying to relieve myself of these sexual fantasies and he’s unknowingly kinda feeding them. Or knowingly? The guy really toes the line with me …cracking sex jokes and commenting on my body and touching me even when I expressed discomfort …I was trying really hard to just be normal but he must have thought I was just being shy or something bc there are multiple instances of him inviting me to sit on his lap and cuddle… and when I said no he’d pull me in and tell me I was safe until I gave in. And then I’d feel so gross for liking the cuddles and so empty when they’d stop.
Really what I’m worried about is how this has to be just a result of a confusing and emotional time compounded with a lack of healthy platonic boundaries with men in my life but I literally can’t speak to anyone about this and I am not comfortable enough with my new therapist to disclose this part of myself. It’s honestly so shameful for me bc sometimes the only way I can cum from sex or masturbation is when these thoughts come and I can’t stop them so I let them win.
Am I wrong? Wtf is happening and how do I stop it
I have separated myself for a few months but soon will Be moving back to the town an hour way from Him and he will eventually wonder why I’m Not seeing him as much or at all.
Need help for sure
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http://rodzice.org/