4th grade literacy lessons
A Place for Reading Teachers
2014.08.13 02:10 Njdevils11 A Place for Reading Teachers
This sub reddit is for literacy teachers to share strategies, tips, pitfalls, and successes. All teachers are welcome, but this sub is dedicated to teaching emerging and elementary literacy skills.
2024.05.29 02:52 silvershsrpie [Request] Girlfriends 22nd bday(June) [Texas]
So im trying to plan out this large scale birthday surprise for my girlfriend- shes never really had a good birthday and has suffered from neglect for years from family-
To put it blunt- she has a 4th grade education and has intense social anxiety- shes a smart girl even with that level of education , and a lack of friends but i know words of encouragement would help-
In terms of interests she likes hello kitty, ICP, and Killer Klowns from outter space (the old movie),Gift cards work too
she is savvy in drawing if anybody wants to possibly send anything-
a card would be plenty- ♡
Thank you for this opporitunity to make her birthday special!
submitted by silvershsrpie to RandomActsofCards [link] [comments]
To put it blunt- she has a 4th grade education and has intense social anxiety- shes a smart girl even with that level of education , and a lack of friends but i know words of encouragement would help-
In terms of interests she likes hello kitty, ICP, and Killer Klowns from outter space (the old movie),Gift cards work too
she is savvy in drawing if anybody wants to possibly send anything-
a card would be plenty- ♡
Thank you for this opporitunity to make her birthday special!
2024.05.29 02:48 Little_Mel Advice on 1st year middle school math teacher with ADHD
I'll try not to overexplain myself but tldr timeline for background (you don't have to read this): - (high school) good at teaching and always working with students so I decided I wanted to teach - (1st year in college teaching program) decided I can't be a teacher because I'm too conflict averse to handle a classroom - (all 4 years of college) did service in tutoring programs for middle school students (5th and 7th) - (mid way through college, pandemic) got diagnosed with adhd and suddenly a lot of things about my social problems, forgetfulness, excessive need for control, and anxiety make sense - (end of college) started running a K-5 summer camp and realized classroom management is a skill I can learn - (right after graduating) took a job as a 7th grade in class tutor at a title 1 school and got to see exactly teaching looks like; realized I want to teach and that I will not stop thinking about it until I try it - (by the end of tutor job) got into an alternative teaching program and got offered a job as a 6th grade math teacher in urban school - (present) got a job as a sub to increase my confidence in handling middle schoolers behavioral lu
Anyway to the actual question:
I am a control freak. I absolutely try to be ready for everything even though I know it'll never work out as I plan it, but it makes me feel more confident when dealing with things.
One of the things I'm most worried about is how to handle my ADHD in such a chaotic (as in there is a lot of keep track of and a lot of problems I will face) environment (which I know it will be).
It's not so much about organization as it is about thinking about problems I'll face daily that I can plan for. For instance, I know logging behavior is very important for more behaviorally challenging students, but remembering conversations and events is very difficult for me sometimes, so I might have to log it in in that second, even if it's in the middle of a lesson. I'm not sure how to deal with this. Stuff like making my classroom accessible to make things the easiest they can be for me and my students.
Things I am thinking of doing:
Also, any specific advice about social cues would be helpful as well as I struggle with that a lot and have to learn by example. My therapist believes I have autism but I am not diagnosed.
submitted by Little_Mel to Teachers [link] [comments]
Anyway to the actual question:
I am a control freak. I absolutely try to be ready for everything even though I know it'll never work out as I plan it, but it makes me feel more confident when dealing with things.
One of the things I'm most worried about is how to handle my ADHD in such a chaotic (as in there is a lot of keep track of and a lot of problems I will face) environment (which I know it will be).
It's not so much about organization as it is about thinking about problems I'll face daily that I can plan for. For instance, I know logging behavior is very important for more behaviorally challenging students, but remembering conversations and events is very difficult for me sometimes, so I might have to log it in in that second, even if it's in the middle of a lesson. I'm not sure how to deal with this. Stuff like making my classroom accessible to make things the easiest they can be for me and my students.
Things I am thinking of doing:
- Pencils and erasers in every table (specifically cheap erasers and the tiny pencils to discourage students from taking them) I don't want to deal with kids asking me for a pencil every second. I'd rather just provide it.
- Color coding everything by class period (turn in trays, absent work station for the previous week, table groups)
- getting a smart watch to set timers and remind me of the time because my time blindness is severe, also for any messages from any teacher group chat for school updates because I always forget to check my phone
- pocket sleeves where I'll put handouts and students can use markers to do scratch work in for things that aren't graded assignments
- I have a tablet I carry around for anything I need to write and access while I'm walking (it works great for taking attendance as a sub as well and keeping track of a seating chart)
- yoga ball to sit on during planning periods so I can sit on my desk during planning periods (hidden away from the kids)
- lots of things hung up that refer to voice level and classroom etiquette (made by students at beginning of the year) to easily refer to for students who are making trouble
- basic handouts for basic arithmetic skills for students who are behind and calculators to make other lessons accessible
- stuffed animals to have for personal comfort when overstimulated or having a bad day; also a fidget ring and lots of fidget toys for me (still weighing options about whether to provide some for the students, I'll have to make some sort of system)
- and many more stuff I can't remember
Also, any specific advice about social cues would be helpful as well as I struggle with that a lot and have to learn by example. My therapist believes I have autism but I am not diagnosed.
2024.05.29 02:37 Niiyonn Detailed 1500-Hour Update!!
 | TLDR: I can understand almost everything well and can speak quite comfortably. I haven't read much, but I could understand the things I have read without much trouble. I still have lots of room for improvement until I reach my definition of spoken fluency, which is speaking without hesitations or pauses. Click here to see me speaking at 1,500 hours. submitted by Niiyonn to dreamingspanish [link] [comments] Table of Contents
My Spanish BackgroundI took three years of high school Spanish from 2015 to 2018. I also took two semesters of Spanish in college, one in the spring of 2020 and one in the fall of 2022. I could only conjugate the present tense, and it was difficult for me to understand anything. I started using the Refold ES1K Anki deck sporadically in mid-September 2021. I started using it more consistently in the summer of 2022 and finished it in mid-October 2022. I stopped using Anki when I finished the deck because I noticed I was picking up new words from Dreaming Spanish alone. I started using Dreaming Spanish seriously about two weeks before the start of the fall 2022 Spanish class, at which point I had 14 hours of prior Dreaming Spanish watch time logged. I got serious with Dreaming Spanish in January 2023. I hit 1,000 hours in November 2023.My Thoughts About Dreaming Spanish and Comprehensible InputWithout Dreaming Spanish, I wouldn't be at my current level. The "just sit back and watch" method is so easy and straightforward that it motivated me to take learning Spanish seriously for the first time. I saw results so early in the process that I had complete faith in Dreaming Spanish and abandoned all grammar and vocabulary study. Having the entire journey laid out on the roadmap was also incredibly reassuring and provided micro and macro goals for me to achieve. I also found the roadmap accurate, so I will use it to learn future languages.Statistics BreakdownHere are my statistics as of 1500 hours of input and speaking (not including the 76.23 hours of Anki flashcards I did).Figure A
Figure B https://preview.redd.it/esrwc6enx83d1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=f2f201928b0a3ea0f9e2c202c268bacfcecc236e Figure C shows how much time I spent doing each activity between 1,021 (when I made my last update) and 1,500 hours. Figure C
Figure D https://preview.redd.it/uphv2ghiy83d1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=4ed5b33da66fc3e94dbfe00be062f2eb171b2f5f *WorldsAcross Lessons: This is the time during my tutoring sessions when I was not talking or barely talking. For example, if doing a 1-hour group lesson with 2 other students, I would count 1/3 as conversation practice and 2/3 as a WorldsAcross Lesson. Another example would be time spent listening to a tutor talk the vast majority of the time or watching a video with a tutor. *Crosstalk: I only counted half of each crosstalk session as input. For example, I logged 30 minutes after having a 1-hour conversation. *TV: Live-action shows *Voice Rooms: This is the time spent lurking and listening to people speak in voice rooms. Crosstalk I did not do much crosstalk because I preferred to just watch content. Also, because of the way I chose to log crosstalk time, I felt it would be better to get 1 hour of input from media than 30 minutes from a 1-hour crosstalk session. Podcasts Being able to understand podcasts was a key point in my learning journey. I was no longer bound to a computer screen, and I could get input while doing chores or going about my day. My top podcast early on was Español con Juan (ECJ). His podcasts are super fun to listen to and very comprehensible. After finishing ECJ, I listened to Charlas Hispanas, but only Fredo's episodes since I was only interested in Mexican Spanish. I then listened to tons of Siempre Hay Flores. I currently rotate between Leyendas Legendarias, Cuida tu Mente, El Dollop, and Siempre Hay Flores. I will occasionally mix in episodes from other podcasts like ECJ, WorldsAcross' advanced Spanish podcast, or Advanced Spanish Podcast by Spanish with Cesar. I started listening to Leyendas Legendarias and El Dollop after hitting 1,000 hours to challenge myself. They are comedy podcasts with the same hosts. The hosts speak fast and talk over each other at times. I can now understand Leyendas Legendarias and El Dollop very well, though I certainly miss things at times. Anime Dubbed anime is much easier to understand for me than live-action shows for native speakers. As such, I only watched dubbed anime pre 1,000 hours. I prefer animated shows over live-action ones, so this decision did not bother me. My Hero Academia and Black Clover are two anime with tons of episodes if you're looking for shows where you can get accustomed to the characters' voices. My Hero Academia has about 45 hours of content, while Black Clover has about 55 hours of content. Anime is currently my primary source of audio-visual content. I tried incorporating live-action stuff to challenge myself, but I would always get bored. I am still improving without live-action content, so I don't think it's necessary to watch it if you don't like it. Conversation Practice Essentially 100% of my time spent doing conversation practice (speaking) has been done with tutors from WorldsAcross* (see me review here). Most of that time has been with Venezuelan tutors. However, I now take more classes with Mexican tutors now that there are more on the platform. I decided to do tutoring instead of speaking with language exchange partners to save time because I was only interested in speaking Spanish. For example, I didn't want to have to do 30 minutes in Spanish and 30 minutes in English. Tutoring has also helped me be consistent with my output. I am currently doing five to six 1-hour lessons per week through WorldsAcross' unlimited plan and count the entire hour as speaking time. As I near 200 hours of speaking practice and my speaking skills get more refined, I will switch to their 15-monthly-classes plan to start making more Spanish speaking friends and talking with them. *WorldsAcross (WA) is a subscription-based Spanish tutoring platform. They are a lot more affordable than iTalki if you plan on doing at least 10 classes per month. WA lets you book each 1-on-1 class for up to 90 minutes. If you only book 90-minute classes on their basic plan of ten 1-on-1 classes per month, the cost comes out to ~$6.67 per hour. You can also book same-day classes, and all their plans offer unlimited access to group classes, which I've had fun doing with other Dreaming Spanish users. My affiliate code YONTZAMIGOS will give you 30% your first month :) Disclaimer: I will make a commission if you sign up for WorldsAcross using my code. YouTube YouTube was essential for me at around 350 hours because it provided variety in my input. Dreaming Spanish is a great resource, but I occasionally got burnt out with it. Luisito Comunica and Cocinando Corea were my most watched channels and are very easy to understand as far as native content goes. Reading Figure E
Percent from Books: 95.13 Percent from Articles: 4.87 Figure F
Disclaimer: The links to El príncipe del sol and Magic Treehouse are affiliate links. I will make a commission if you click through and make a purchase. Major Milestones150 hours: I started listening to podcasts alongside Dreaming Spanish because I realized I could listen to and understand Español con Juan.~250-300 hours: I genuinely understood Luisito Comunica's videos. I had tried watching some of his videos in Superbeginner and was utterly lost. I also visited my Spanish-speaking family roughly around this time, and I was able to follow a 30-minute conversation they had. I also started focusing on Mexican Spanish content at this time. ~440 hours: Dubbed anime became accessible to me. I started watching My Hero Academia and One Punch Man, and I understood them well enough to enjoy them and follow the story just fine. However, I decided to stop watching dubbed anime after I finished One Punch Man and one or two seasons of My Hero Academia because I felt I would benefit more from learner-focused content. 611 hours: I revisited My Hero Academia and found it was much easier. ~800 hours: Anime became my primary source of daily input. I started watching anime I had never seen before and could comprehend everything extremely well. At this point, I started only watching new Dreaming Spanish videos that seemed interesting. 1000 hours: I had a conversation in Spanish for the first time. I spoke for two hours, and I was blown away by my ability to convey everything I wanted to say. It wasn't smooth or effortless, but I surpassed all expectations I had for myself. Click here to listen to a recording of my second conversation after hitting 1,000 hours. I started reading this book for Spanish learners, and was able to understand basically everything. There were some words that I didn't know, but they didn't impede my comprehension of the text. ~1150 hours: I started reading my first Spanish-language novel, El príncipe del sol by Claudia Ramírez Lomelí, and was able to easily understand the story. ~1450 hours: I started reading El ego es el enemigo by Ryan Holiday. There were plenty of words that I didn't understand, but they didn't hinder my understanding. Disclaimer: The links to El príncipe del sol and El ego es el enemigo are affiliate links. I will make a commission if you click through and make a purchase. My Current AbilityI can understand basically everything I watch or listen to. I can speak very well and have conversations with native speakers about complex topics, but I do not consider myself fluent yet. It's important to define what I consider fluency (specifically spoken fluency), so here is a definition Chat GPT gave me that I agree with:"Spoken fluency refers to the ability to express oneself smoothly and coherently in spoken language, demonstrating ease of communication without frequent hesitations, disruptions, or difficulty in finding words." By this definition, I am not fluent because I still pause, hesitate, and struggle to recall words. I will be fluent once I can speak without many interruptions, even if I still make errors. It is easy for me to switch between English and Spanish. Overall, I am delighted with my current level and look forward to getting even better. My Plans Moving ForwardI wanted reach 500,000-1,000,000 words read and get 100-150 hours of conversation practice before hitting 1,500 hours to show what someone who did a LOT of reading, speaking, and listening could achieve by level 7 of the Dreaming Spanish roadmap. I managed to reach my speaking target, but I completely missed my reading target. As such, I will be reading more consistently by reading here and there throughout the day. I didn't have the habit of reading before learning Spanish, so the prospect of reading for long periods of time made me shy away from reading.As of now, I plan to keep tracking words-read and speaking time until 3,000 hours of input. General Thoughts and AdviceI plan to learn another language after Spanish. Although, I'm not yet sure which one. I will likely do a lot more crosstalk and count 1 hour of crosstalk as 1 hour of input instead of 30 minutes like I did with Spanish.I would read more consistently after hitting 1,000 hours. I don't know if waiting until 1k helped me jump to more advanced texts faster, but I don't regret not having read earlier. The toughest periods are the very beginning and 300-500 hours. When I first started Spanish, I would do Pomodoro sessions to help me focus as much as possible on the Dreaming Spanish videos. It's completely normal to feel tired from listening to Spanish, especially in the beginning, so take breaks when you need them. The period between 300-500 hours was an absolute grind for me. I no longer found things interesting just because they were in Spanish, and the things I really wanted to watch were above my level. If I had to start over, I would likely do a lot more crosstalk during this period. Thankfully, I found some YouTube channels that were easy enough to carry me through this period. My greatest success was the first time I spoke after hitting 1,000 hours--that conversation lasted 2 hours! I hadn't spoken before that point, and I was blown away by my speaking ability because I had absolutely NO prior expectations. Spoken fluency is a grind. You will sound terrible at first and likely feel awkward and embarrassed. You just have to keep pushing. You might also feel like your speaking ability is actually somehow regressing at times. Don't worry. That feeling is completely normal and comes and goes. As long as you keep spending time speaking, you WILL improve. Consistency is king. Do at least a few minutes of Spanish every day rather than completely skipping a day. Feel free to ask my questions about anything I may not have covered in this update!! My Related LinksMy 1000-Hour UpdateMy Speaking Progress Videos My WorldsAcross Review My Spanish Progress Website My Spanish Resources Website |
2024.05.29 02:06 NoVisual299 All my friends, schoolmates and siblings seem to be getting ahead in life and I’m the only one being left behind.
I feel like everyone around me is getting successful. For starters I’m on my senior year and getting ready for college. When the results came out most got in whilst I got waitlisted. Now as graduation came, many of my friends even the ones who really didn’t do much are getting awards because of group projects like for research. Whilst I got totally nothing. It was the same the previous year where I didn’t get an award because I missed a subject grade mark by one point. I just really feel that everyone is getting ahead of me and that life just isn’t on my side no matter what I do. I begin to ask myself what am I doing wrong or what they are doing right. It’s like they just gradually grow and you’re just stagnant.
In terms of my siblings I feel like I let myself down. Growing up, I was often teased by my aunts and called me things like “gay” because I was weak and all when I was younger. So there was pressure uptil now to be strong. I never been into basketball, as a guy and the eldest I pressured myself alot. So I tried and I was never sold. Now in driving lessons I am practically the worst. And it just feels like nothing can go right for me in life.
Sometimes in life, I feel like I could blame all the people in the world. But I am generally just lost and all. I do not know what to do or even who to approach.
Although all of these are happening the only thing I know true to myself is I will never stop trying. It just really hurts so much that it feels like my efforts are meaningless and some didn’t even try and got something.
And I feel like it would be unfair to myself to tell me success is near. Because I keep telling myself that and success isn’t there yet. So am I just waiting for something that isn’t even coming?
I’m just so sick of it all. I feel like my life is about watching other people’s success all the time. And other people didn’t experience what I experienced so it’s like the leapfrogged without any hardships.
submitted by NoVisual299 to Advice [link] [comments]
In terms of my siblings I feel like I let myself down. Growing up, I was often teased by my aunts and called me things like “gay” because I was weak and all when I was younger. So there was pressure uptil now to be strong. I never been into basketball, as a guy and the eldest I pressured myself alot. So I tried and I was never sold. Now in driving lessons I am practically the worst. And it just feels like nothing can go right for me in life.
Sometimes in life, I feel like I could blame all the people in the world. But I am generally just lost and all. I do not know what to do or even who to approach.
Although all of these are happening the only thing I know true to myself is I will never stop trying. It just really hurts so much that it feels like my efforts are meaningless and some didn’t even try and got something.
And I feel like it would be unfair to myself to tell me success is near. Because I keep telling myself that and success isn’t there yet. So am I just waiting for something that isn’t even coming?
I’m just so sick of it all. I feel like my life is about watching other people’s success all the time. And other people didn’t experience what I experienced so it’s like the leapfrogged without any hardships.
2024.05.29 02:04 Royal-Procedure6491 How is Babby formed? (A discussion about sex education in Taiwan)
Context: I teach 6th grade here in the public school system. I am originally from the US. In the US, basic sex education begins in either 5th or 6th grade, but by that time most parents have at least given their children the basic rundown of how babies are made.
Anyway, I was teaching via showing music videos and there was a video that showed a man and a woman kissing (a scene from the movie Titanic, very mild). Most of the students turned their heads away as if they were not allowed to see two people kissing. I joked that I'm sure their parents have never kissed before. One student (I allow them to speak/write Chinese when they can't express themselves in English) told me that it's inappropriate for someone his age to see kissing. In my casual way, I said "just imagine if you knew how babies were made. Do you think you delivered to your parents by a bird (stork)?"
They literally said yes. And they were not alone. And the local teacher gave me a freaked out look like I was gonna start showing them diagrams of naked bodies or something.
After work, I looked into it a bit and apparently people don't even receive basic sex education in Taiwan until 9th grade?! Is that right? If so... how do Taiwanese parents explain pregnant mothers to their children? "Oh, she's just getting fat so that the special bird can visit and take away her fat and magically turn it into a baby"?
I mean, part of the reason I left teaching in the US is because kids as young as 4th grade were watching literal porn and trying to re-enact it, but 6th graders here believing they were dropped off by a stork?! Kinda blows my mind.
So, locals- when did you first receive sex education? From your school or parents? If you are parents yourselves, when did you or when do you plan to speak about sex to your kids?
submitted by Royal-Procedure6491 to taiwan [link] [comments]
Anyway, I was teaching via showing music videos and there was a video that showed a man and a woman kissing (a scene from the movie Titanic, very mild). Most of the students turned their heads away as if they were not allowed to see two people kissing. I joked that I'm sure their parents have never kissed before. One student (I allow them to speak/write Chinese when they can't express themselves in English) told me that it's inappropriate for someone his age to see kissing. In my casual way, I said "just imagine if you knew how babies were made. Do you think you delivered to your parents by a bird (stork)?"
They literally said yes. And they were not alone. And the local teacher gave me a freaked out look like I was gonna start showing them diagrams of naked bodies or something.
After work, I looked into it a bit and apparently people don't even receive basic sex education in Taiwan until 9th grade?! Is that right? If so... how do Taiwanese parents explain pregnant mothers to their children? "Oh, she's just getting fat so that the special bird can visit and take away her fat and magically turn it into a baby"?
I mean, part of the reason I left teaching in the US is because kids as young as 4th grade were watching literal porn and trying to re-enact it, but 6th graders here believing they were dropped off by a stork?! Kinda blows my mind.
So, locals- when did you first receive sex education? From your school or parents? If you are parents yourselves, when did you or when do you plan to speak about sex to your kids?
2024.05.29 01:45 callherjacob Using a Summer Workbook with Autistic Child
In addition to reading aloud to my kids this summer, I'm also using Summer Brain Quest books to practice skills and expose them to new information. One of my children is below grade level (heading into 3rd grade) so the 2nd-3rd book has material that is unfamiliar and also material he has already mastered.
At the last IEP meeting, I took the opportunity to ask about my summer plan, stating that my goal is to expose but not frustrate. If the kids don't know something, cool. I'll explain it and we'll move on. The purpose of having a little something to do is to keep their thinking minds engaged and we take 10-15 minutes per page spread which represents a very small portion of their day. The rest of the day is for play and relaxation. My son's new special ed teacher said it was a great plan to expose him to information he doesn't yet have as she would also be introducing grade-level work herself this fall.
I made the mistake (or maybe not) of asking my mother to help them this morning as she was watching the kids while I went to a lengthy doctor's appointment. She's a retired elementary school teacher - though she never taught in a special ed classroom. What could go wrong? 😪
When I picked them up, she angrily told me that the material was too advanced and that it was cruel to "make" my struggling child suffer through it. This was after I had sat down with her and explained that much of the material was within reach and some was a stretch as well as explaining that, where there are educational obstacles, I step in and work through it with him rather than requiring him to do the work himself. It's all very low pressure. What they worked on today was commas and apostrophes which he hasn't been taught yet to my knowledge. I don't expect mastery AT ALL. And, he has actually been succeeding! She skipped over commas and focused on apostrophes which I understand as commas are the devil. lol
So, my questions to the special education teachers are as follows: Is it cruel for me to review new information over a 10-15 minute lesson that my son has never seen and cannot currently master? Would it be better to pick a workbook that contains only skills he has already mastered? Keeping in mind that I am in no way tracking his progress. This exercise is strictly to engage his mind for a few minutes a day.
submitted by callherjacob to specialed [link] [comments]
At the last IEP meeting, I took the opportunity to ask about my summer plan, stating that my goal is to expose but not frustrate. If the kids don't know something, cool. I'll explain it and we'll move on. The purpose of having a little something to do is to keep their thinking minds engaged and we take 10-15 minutes per page spread which represents a very small portion of their day. The rest of the day is for play and relaxation. My son's new special ed teacher said it was a great plan to expose him to information he doesn't yet have as she would also be introducing grade-level work herself this fall.
I made the mistake (or maybe not) of asking my mother to help them this morning as she was watching the kids while I went to a lengthy doctor's appointment. She's a retired elementary school teacher - though she never taught in a special ed classroom. What could go wrong? 😪
When I picked them up, she angrily told me that the material was too advanced and that it was cruel to "make" my struggling child suffer through it. This was after I had sat down with her and explained that much of the material was within reach and some was a stretch as well as explaining that, where there are educational obstacles, I step in and work through it with him rather than requiring him to do the work himself. It's all very low pressure. What they worked on today was commas and apostrophes which he hasn't been taught yet to my knowledge. I don't expect mastery AT ALL. And, he has actually been succeeding! She skipped over commas and focused on apostrophes which I understand as commas are the devil. lol
So, my questions to the special education teachers are as follows: Is it cruel for me to review new information over a 10-15 minute lesson that my son has never seen and cannot currently master? Would it be better to pick a workbook that contains only skills he has already mastered? Keeping in mind that I am in no way tracking his progress. This exercise is strictly to engage his mind for a few minutes a day.
2024.05.29 01:43 StatisticianBetter23 1Qb team advice.
12man 1 QB full PPR
Start -1QB/2RB/3W1TE/1 FLEX/kickeDST
QB: J.Herbert/G.Minshew
RB:T.Spears/M. Sanders /K. Mitchell /R. Johnson/C.Rodriguez/J.Wright/K.Vidal
WR: P. Nacua / N.Collins/ T.Higgins/ R.Rice/JSN/D.WalkeJ.bakeR.Pearsall
TE: T.McBride
2025 : 1st x2 (top 5 pick and mid) /2ndx4/3rd/4th
2026: 2ndx3/3rd/4th
2027 1st/2nd/3rd
Thoughts ?
My thoughts.. grade mutiple running backs in the 2025 draft and start my road to compete.
submitted by StatisticianBetter23 to DynastyFFTradeAdvice [link] [comments]
Start -1QB/2RB/3W1TE/1 FLEX/kickeDST
QB: J.Herbert/G.Minshew
RB:T.Spears/M. Sanders /K. Mitchell /R. Johnson/C.Rodriguez/J.Wright/K.Vidal
WR: P. Nacua / N.Collins/ T.Higgins/ R.Rice/JSN/D.WalkeJ.bakeR.Pearsall
TE: T.McBride
2025 : 1st x2 (top 5 pick and mid) /2ndx4/3rd/4th
2026: 2ndx3/3rd/4th
2027 1st/2nd/3rd
Thoughts ?
My thoughts.. grade mutiple running backs in the 2025 draft and start my road to compete.
2024.05.29 01:12 H4ppy_C Slam Books
Were slam books a Gen X or Millennial thing? I'm a young Gen X 79, and we passed around slam books from 4th through 7th grade. I also remember writing out whole essays with my sentences in different colored ink. It was common where I was raised. These days, we'd definitely be called overachievers. It's wild how meticulous we were with those colored pens.
submitted by H4ppy_C to Millennials [link] [comments]
2024.05.29 00:58 Loose-Breath-620 I didn't want to go to college and now I'm screwed
I came to reddit because right now I feel like I'm drowning and there is no escape. For a little background, I F(19) was expected to go to college since I was small. My mother F(39) would brag about what college I would attend in the future since I was a bright child. It was drilled into me that college, was the way to go in order to have a bright and fulfilled future. I loved school so much I would give gifts to my teachers, participate in after school activities and fairs. I made sure my academics were on top until I reached middle school. Due to constant bullying my grades fell behind, I didn't have enough faith in myself and wondered why I was still here. I gained an anxiety disorder that didn't help with the constant harassment. My mother F(39) didn't realize that her daughter didn't have the same love for school anymore. I wouldn't complete work, I had no motivation to complete anything or even attend school . Therapy did not help in the slightest, the constant reports of bullying never addressed. I ended up repeating a year and was moved to a different school and state. Despite being moved I still struggled academically barely passing each grade. Because of this factor I was behind especially when it came to math. I lacked motivation plain and simple I still lacked the motivation to complete classwork. I attended class on time and trying to understand each lesson but I couldn't keep interest in any of my studies. The work ethic I had as a child was gone, so I barely passed high school. My mom throughout all of this was more of a stressor than a symbol of guidance. My mom is very logical and blunt, so every time my report card came back it was always a yelling match. I was a disappointment to her and she wondered what she had been sacrificing her well being for. We still kept a close relationship despite this since I understood her anger. I was constantly failing and due to the fear of her screaming at me I would lie and say everything was okay, when in actuality things were not. That can be stressful to any parent in her position. To not be able to trust the words of her child. When I graduated high school though it seemed like a breath of fresh air, she cried tears of joy never expecting the day to come. I however made it clear I didn't want to immediately go to college, I wanted to leave an environment that reminded me of school in general. I thought with a job I could rebuild my work ethic since I had proper motivation, money. Which I needed to succeed in life, I even made sure to take a finance class in order grasp a better understanding. I wanted to work for at least a year to try and better understand the real world. My mom of course disapproved and without my permission signed me up for financial aid and for a fall semester. When I found out I told her again that I didn't want to go. She gave me a lecture about how "the world won't wait for me and I'm already behind so I needed to catch up." Without my consent and the threat of being kicked out I went to community college. I failed my first semester and was put on academic probation. During this time I had a job and enjoyed the work. So I asked when I only had 6,000 in debt could I drop out. She cursed me out and said " I wasn't even trying" Again I lack motivation and get anxiety to the point I feel like I'll vomit if I stare at my classwork for too long thinking. I can't maintain focus even with exercises to try and help that. Instead of understanding I had to be put on for spring. Now I'm on academic suspension and owe over 15,000 in debt. I'm angry due to the fact I stated I didn't want to go to college since I wasn't mentally prepared for it in the slightest. I need advice on what to do, I don't like the situation I'm in. Any advice out of it is helpful, even advice on how to pay back student loans would be obliged.
submitted by Loose-Breath-620 to Advice [link] [comments]
2024.05.29 00:46 katennet [TOMT] (fantasy book) elementary school reading level fantasy book series with a fox on one of the covers
i read this book series in my elementary school library. i think i read it in 3rd or 4th grade but am not completely sure. there are at least 3 books in the series and none of them are very long. it's a fantasy series and the main thing i remember is the covers. they were dark colors like blue or green with borders along the edge, a painted or drawn image in the middle with the title towards the bottom. i think the main character was a girl thrust into this a situation where she wasn't prepared to be a hero. i remember an elf village. the fox was somewhat important at least in the first book and i know it's on one of the covers. i wish i remembered more but this has been bothering me for 10 years. if anyone has any ideas i would very much appreciate it!
submitted by katennet to tipofmytongue [link] [comments]
2024.05.29 00:41 Previous-Pea2005 is this unprofessional ?
Hello, I’m a new teacher and it’s my second year teaching and first at my current school. I recently found out my colleagues (who are in higher positions) have been asking their students VERY specific questions about me.
I teach a language class and the outline of the curriculum and grading objectives are set by the department but otherwise I’m in charge of choosing the activities, themes and resources. Halfway through second semester, I received a very concerned email from a colleague who said that she was upset and wanted to talk to me but wouldn’t specify what it was about.
A week later, I came to the meeting she asked for, but there were two other colleagues there. I felt cornered and they told me how concerned and upset they all were. Apparently they had each chosen several students to talk with to get an idea of my exercises and my teaching. They literally brought up specific examples and described ways I had done certain activities. I was very taken aback and asked what the students said, and they said the students were very disappointed (they are older teenagers) in my teaching and felt they learned nothing. They essentially criticised my interaction with students (said i came across disinterested), said my lessons seemed disorganised and my classes had no clear structure. Having never observed me themselves, they felt their worries were justified because all the students they pulled aside had roughly similar complaints (each hinted at having talked to at least 1-2 students). I can’t help but feel like this is not very professional because at my one formal observation the admin person just walked in for a few minutes, smiled and walked out (no feedback)
I’m most likely going to get non-renewed bc of this but as i haven’t had that much teaching experience, I have no way of telling if this is normal or not for new teachers. Has this kind of thing happened to anyone else here?
submitted by Previous-Pea2005 to Teachers [link] [comments]
I teach a language class and the outline of the curriculum and grading objectives are set by the department but otherwise I’m in charge of choosing the activities, themes and resources. Halfway through second semester, I received a very concerned email from a colleague who said that she was upset and wanted to talk to me but wouldn’t specify what it was about.
A week later, I came to the meeting she asked for, but there were two other colleagues there. I felt cornered and they told me how concerned and upset they all were. Apparently they had each chosen several students to talk with to get an idea of my exercises and my teaching. They literally brought up specific examples and described ways I had done certain activities. I was very taken aback and asked what the students said, and they said the students were very disappointed (they are older teenagers) in my teaching and felt they learned nothing. They essentially criticised my interaction with students (said i came across disinterested), said my lessons seemed disorganised and my classes had no clear structure. Having never observed me themselves, they felt their worries were justified because all the students they pulled aside had roughly similar complaints (each hinted at having talked to at least 1-2 students). I can’t help but feel like this is not very professional because at my one formal observation the admin person just walked in for a few minutes, smiled and walked out (no feedback)
I’m most likely going to get non-renewed bc of this but as i haven’t had that much teaching experience, I have no way of telling if this is normal or not for new teachers. Has this kind of thing happened to anyone else here?
2024.05.29 00:38 FewSlip8394 Am I a Jerk for Voicing Concerns About My Friend’s Influence?
I, a 16-year-old female, am having an issue with one of my friends, a 14-year-old male. Recently, before we entered high school, I noticed that he had been caring less about his grades and not trying to do his work. Over time, I thought this was just a phase he would grow out of, but I was wrong.
When we started high school, he began being mean towards my friends and even the teachers, to the point where he would be taken out of class. He doesn’t even study unless he is forced to do so by his parents. Recently, I found out he has a crush on my best friend. He walks beside her when they go to their next class. I don’t know why, but this boy gives me bad vibes. I don’t want him to be a bad influence on my best friend. Adding to my concerns, 14M gets bullied a lot and always lashes out at people. I’m afraid he might do the same to my best friend May.
Me and May have known each other since 4th grade. She was the person who helped me out of three years of depression. May always cares about her grades and others, but I am worried that 14M might be a bad influence. I’ve tried talking to May about this, but every time she acts like it is normal. However, I don’t trust 14M around May.
I’m worried that if I speak up, I might ruin our relationship. I’ve known him for a while and we used to be close, so I’m conflicted about what to do. My best friend and I have a strong bond, and I don’t want this situation to cause any tension between us. How should I handle this?
submitted by FewSlip8394 to AmITheJerk [link] [comments]
When we started high school, he began being mean towards my friends and even the teachers, to the point where he would be taken out of class. He doesn’t even study unless he is forced to do so by his parents. Recently, I found out he has a crush on my best friend. He walks beside her when they go to their next class. I don’t know why, but this boy gives me bad vibes. I don’t want him to be a bad influence on my best friend. Adding to my concerns, 14M gets bullied a lot and always lashes out at people. I’m afraid he might do the same to my best friend May.
Me and May have known each other since 4th grade. She was the person who helped me out of three years of depression. May always cares about her grades and others, but I am worried that 14M might be a bad influence. I’ve tried talking to May about this, but every time she acts like it is normal. However, I don’t trust 14M around May.
I’m worried that if I speak up, I might ruin our relationship. I’ve known him for a while and we used to be close, so I’m conflicted about what to do. My best friend and I have a strong bond, and I don’t want this situation to cause any tension between us. How should I handle this?
2024.05.29 00:30 smita16 Need help proving to my wife that reading Warhammer books and watching Lore videos is part of the hobby!
After getting laid off last year I went through several hobbies trying to find what appealed to me, because of this my wife says I have Hobby ADD. So she gives me levels based on how long I pursue a hobby.
In visiting my local hobby store I was introduced to Kill Team, and then 40K but I have been reading Warhammer fantasy and 40K books since high school! I am 33 now. It just never occurred to me to look into 40K as a hobby.
At the moment I have about 500 pts in a DG 40K army, and I will soon have 2k points in Maggotkin in prep for AoS 4th edition. This is with less than 6 months in the hobby. Most of these are put together and in various levels of painted completion.
In jokingly petitioning my wife for an early level up (currently level 1) grade she tells me that reading books and watching lore videos is not part of the hobby.
So I thought I would reach out to the community and see if yall would consider it part of the hobby.
submitted by smita16 to Warhammer40k [link] [comments]
In visiting my local hobby store I was introduced to Kill Team, and then 40K but I have been reading Warhammer fantasy and 40K books since high school! I am 33 now. It just never occurred to me to look into 40K as a hobby.
At the moment I have about 500 pts in a DG 40K army, and I will soon have 2k points in Maggotkin in prep for AoS 4th edition. This is with less than 6 months in the hobby. Most of these are put together and in various levels of painted completion.
In jokingly petitioning my wife for an early level up (currently level 1) grade she tells me that reading books and watching lore videos is not part of the hobby.
So I thought I would reach out to the community and see if yall would consider it part of the hobby.
2024.05.29 00:26 Primary_Okra2071 Fun games/drills for last practice? (Girls 3/4th grade)
we have our last practice coming up and i want to have some fun. i have an obstacle course planned and a water balloon competition. i need at least one more fun little drill/game to fill our time! :) we’ve played so much sharks and minnows unfortunately LOL
submitted by Primary_Okra2071 to lacrosse [link] [comments]
2024.05.28 23:59 Apprehensive-Ad3017 Helped a good friend avoid a toxic relationship
Watched today's (05/28) video, and the first story reminds me of a similar situation I was in. Sorry this turned out kinda long.
For context, I now identify as nonbinary, but during this event, I had not realized it yet and was still identifying as female. Names have been simplified to just initials. Our school was K-12, with grades K-6 in one part of the building while 7-12th was in another part of the building. Freshman - Grade 9, Sophomore - Grade 10, Junior - Grade 11, Senior - Grade 12.
I (25NB, lesbian) was at a party with some friends back in high school, about 2 months before the year ended. These friends were a group I was in that there were like 4 guys and 3 girls. Boys: AF, TV, AS, AN; Girls: ID (me), XV, ML; TV and XV are siblings. I had gotten close to AF in an art class that we shared a few years earlier and we became friends when I was 8th grade and AF was 9th grade, and I ended up getting brought into this group, even though I was younger than them. So everyone in this part was older than me. I was friendly with the person hosting, even though I didn't talk to them a whole lot, but always said "Hi" to them in the halls and talked with them when they were around, so I got invited to the party even though I was younger. I didn't hang out with the host much outside of school, but I was friendly with everyone in the senior class. It was either the host's 18th birthday or one of their close friend's birthdays, I don't remember. Also the antagonist of this story will be reffered to as DW, Dumb Witch, because I don't remember her name. She had just transferred into the school, halfway through the previous year.
At this party, I was chatting with some of my guy friends from the group, TV and AS, and some others at the party that I was friendly with. At the time, AF, XV, and ML were a little bit away, talking with others. And AN hadn't arrived yet. Suddenly, DW walks up to us and starts accusing me of cheating on one of the other guys from our friend group, AF, interrupting whatever we had been talking about. We all kind of stare at her like a fish out of water, confused. While I was definitely closer to AF than the others, I was not dating him. Then she repeated it, saying my name and that I was cheating on AF with either AS or TV. At that, the 3 of us laughed, admittedly I snorted, and even the others we were talking to chuckled. DW got furious that we laughed at this. She said I was a shitty person by blatantly cheating right in front of everyone and no one was saying anything about it all year. Litterally everyone else knew at this point that none of the girls were dating any of the guys in the group. Among the group, we knew that AS had a crush on DW for the better part of the school year (she was pretty and popular despite being "new" compared to everyone else in the grade). I asked what she was talking about, because I wasn't dating any of them. And she brought up that I'm always hanging out with them, and I always choose to sit next to AF, etc. Just anything that said could implicate that I was dating AF, and that was the only was an underclassman could be included in a group of seniors. I pointed out that I was only a year younger, and underclassman refers to Freshman and Sophomore years, and again stated that was not dating AF as I was gay.
This kind of continued back and forth of DW pointing out something, and me, TV and AS saying that it was not like that. Even the other's, that aren't part of the group, jumped in saying literally everyone knew that I wasn't dating AF, or any of the guys in the group. And for some reason DW wasn't listening. After probably the 4th or 5th time of this going, I audibly groaned in frustration, which was loud enough to get the attention of AF, XV, and ML. While they politely excused themselves from their conversation they were in, I finally exclaimed that I'm a lesbian, which I pointed out at the beginning of the accusation. (As soon as I had come out to my parents in sophomore year, I was out. I didn't hide it or anything.) Unfortunately, DW didn't believe me... until the others joined us and AF also stated that we were just friends and that it would never happen because 1) He did not have feelings for me, 2) He was still healing from his previous relationship (very toxic), and 3) I'm a lesbian.
After this whole incident, it was revealed a week later that she was interested in one of our other friends IM (not part of the main group, but occasionally hung out with us). IM had missed the party because of work. IM and DW dated for the last couple months of the school year. And he was miserable. When they broke up (like a week before graduation) IM admitted to AS that AS dodged a bullet by not wanting anything to do with DW after the party. DW didn't let IM hang out with anyone without her, and since she had beef with me, it meant IM never got to hang out with us unless he lied to her and said he was sick just to hang out.
submitted by Apprehensive-Ad3017 to CharlotteDobreYouTube [link] [comments]
For context, I now identify as nonbinary, but during this event, I had not realized it yet and was still identifying as female. Names have been simplified to just initials. Our school was K-12, with grades K-6 in one part of the building while 7-12th was in another part of the building. Freshman - Grade 9, Sophomore - Grade 10, Junior - Grade 11, Senior - Grade 12.
I (25NB, lesbian) was at a party with some friends back in high school, about 2 months before the year ended. These friends were a group I was in that there were like 4 guys and 3 girls. Boys: AF, TV, AS, AN; Girls: ID (me), XV, ML; TV and XV are siblings. I had gotten close to AF in an art class that we shared a few years earlier and we became friends when I was 8th grade and AF was 9th grade, and I ended up getting brought into this group, even though I was younger than them. So everyone in this part was older than me. I was friendly with the person hosting, even though I didn't talk to them a whole lot, but always said "Hi" to them in the halls and talked with them when they were around, so I got invited to the party even though I was younger. I didn't hang out with the host much outside of school, but I was friendly with everyone in the senior class. It was either the host's 18th birthday or one of their close friend's birthdays, I don't remember. Also the antagonist of this story will be reffered to as DW, Dumb Witch, because I don't remember her name. She had just transferred into the school, halfway through the previous year.
At this party, I was chatting with some of my guy friends from the group, TV and AS, and some others at the party that I was friendly with. At the time, AF, XV, and ML were a little bit away, talking with others. And AN hadn't arrived yet. Suddenly, DW walks up to us and starts accusing me of cheating on one of the other guys from our friend group, AF, interrupting whatever we had been talking about. We all kind of stare at her like a fish out of water, confused. While I was definitely closer to AF than the others, I was not dating him. Then she repeated it, saying my name and that I was cheating on AF with either AS or TV. At that, the 3 of us laughed, admittedly I snorted, and even the others we were talking to chuckled. DW got furious that we laughed at this. She said I was a shitty person by blatantly cheating right in front of everyone and no one was saying anything about it all year. Litterally everyone else knew at this point that none of the girls were dating any of the guys in the group. Among the group, we knew that AS had a crush on DW for the better part of the school year (she was pretty and popular despite being "new" compared to everyone else in the grade). I asked what she was talking about, because I wasn't dating any of them. And she brought up that I'm always hanging out with them, and I always choose to sit next to AF, etc. Just anything that said could implicate that I was dating AF, and that was the only was an underclassman could be included in a group of seniors. I pointed out that I was only a year younger, and underclassman refers to Freshman and Sophomore years, and again stated that was not dating AF as I was gay.
This kind of continued back and forth of DW pointing out something, and me, TV and AS saying that it was not like that. Even the other's, that aren't part of the group, jumped in saying literally everyone knew that I wasn't dating AF, or any of the guys in the group. And for some reason DW wasn't listening. After probably the 4th or 5th time of this going, I audibly groaned in frustration, which was loud enough to get the attention of AF, XV, and ML. While they politely excused themselves from their conversation they were in, I finally exclaimed that I'm a lesbian, which I pointed out at the beginning of the accusation. (As soon as I had come out to my parents in sophomore year, I was out. I didn't hide it or anything.) Unfortunately, DW didn't believe me... until the others joined us and AF also stated that we were just friends and that it would never happen because 1) He did not have feelings for me, 2) He was still healing from his previous relationship (very toxic), and 3) I'm a lesbian.
After this whole incident, it was revealed a week later that she was interested in one of our other friends IM (not part of the main group, but occasionally hung out with us). IM had missed the party because of work. IM and DW dated for the last couple months of the school year. And he was miserable. When they broke up (like a week before graduation) IM admitted to AS that AS dodged a bullet by not wanting anything to do with DW after the party. DW didn't let IM hang out with anyone without her, and since she had beef with me, it meant IM never got to hang out with us unless he lied to her and said he was sick just to hang out.
2024.05.28 23:48 ConsiderationFew6763 In my opinion, r/countable_pixels is the most useless subreddit
You can literally view the size of an image, and it already writes the equation to calculate the number of pixels for you. Let's say I have a 749x288 image, but I wanna know how many pixels there are, I LITERALLY JUST DO 749x288! (215,712) Unless you didn't pass 4th grade math, or have nothing to calculate numbers somehow WHICH IS LITERALLY WHAT A COMPUTER IS, then it's useless. Doesn't matter if you're on phone, pc, laptop, or a Samsung fridge, you can find the amount of pixels in an image. This isn't related to u/molecular_monculus, but that isn't a rule. Just had to get that off my chest.
submitted by ConsiderationFew6763 to molecular_monculus [link] [comments]
2024.05.28 23:39 Holiday_Medium_1181 im 17 and im wasting my life
sorry if this is long but i have a lot going on that i just want to say. today i’ve turned 17 and to be honest i just realized how im literally doing nothing with my life. it probably started with the pandemic, and pretty much now im at my lowest. i feel like sitting at home during the pandemic made me just lose all kind of motivation to do anything. i slowly became socially awkward, lazy and started isolating myself from society more and more, and now it really shows how much it has changed. and since i started attending high school it just kept on getting worse and worse. where i live you attend primary school for 8 years and then you go to high school, so after i finished my exams i had about 5 really close friends, we were hanging often up until the end of the holidays. then obviously we had a bit of less time to meet up but still we stayed in touch. i also started playing drums and music became sort of my new hobby. then 2nd grade of hs started last year and thats when everything started going to shit. one of the friends detached from the group, other one started to have a huge ego, and started constantly insulting me for the fact that i rarely leave home and i spend time by sitting in a basement and playing drums(we became closer towards the last year of high school so that’s why it’s sort of different), and just because let's say he's pretty popular, now there's a bunch of people doing the same. another one which despite starting to insult me for the same reasons it’s not as bad for me since we’ve been friends for really long and i know he’d stick with me. 4th dude honestly never done anything bad to me so can’t say much about him, and the 5th just kinda slowly drifted apart and became less involved but he’s still a good friend. on the last month of the last summer break i started texting a girl from my class since i heard she wanted to play drums and wanted to get to know her a bit better. a month or 2 later she and her dad signed up for lessons at the same instructor, who gave me 2 pairs of drumsticks for them signing up. i decided to give her one pair since i changed to different sized ones. we gradually stopped talking after another month or two. well fast forward to about a month ago, i’ve learned from a friend, that theres a rumour in my school that supposedly i text weird ass shit to girls (and no i was mostly talking with her about drums and music) and it made me realise that for some time less and less people wanted to even talk to me. so now i’m stuck here for 2 more years with a shitty reputation and like 2 good friends. another thing is that i pretty much everyday after school come home, play games, go to sleep, rinse and repeat, on weekends i mostly play games and visit my grandparents. since some time i've stopped playing games with friends, so i just play alone and just listen to music. i live in a pretty big city but every now and then, I drive over to the countryside where i visit my family, and there i admit i have quite a fair amount of friends, but most of those people i dont talk to when im home, and i feel much happier overall when im there. one somewhat good thing is i have a really good relationship with my close family, and so i pretty much get whatever i want, which i kinda feel bad about, since sometimes it feels like im asking them for too much. well as i said earlier today was my birthday, and i had a small party with my family, i had a lot of fun, and im kinda sad it's coming to an end, since well it is a special day and i just wish it would last a bit longer since it's probably the happiest i have been for a long time, but it also made me think about everything that i wish would be different, and had to get it out. not sure if thats all but i feel better now so i guess thats it
edit: i guess i could mention that i mostly like things which arent popular and i dont have a lot of fashinable clothes, have a bad haircut, and from what i’ve heard im pretty unattractive
tldr:im sitting at home doing nothing, have a bad reputation for texting a girl, lost some friends, and overall cant make new friendships
submitted by Holiday_Medium_1181 to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
edit: i guess i could mention that i mostly like things which arent popular and i dont have a lot of fashinable clothes, have a bad haircut, and from what i’ve heard im pretty unattractive
tldr:im sitting at home doing nothing, have a bad reputation for texting a girl, lost some friends, and overall cant make new friendships
2024.05.28 23:27 chefkurry2 Thoughts on kids at LIB?
I always am so back and forth on this. My first few LIBs it would make me really uncomfortable knowing how many people around the kids are on drugs.. but by my 4th and 5th LIBs seeing them during the day time having fun acutally looks wholesome and cute. Late at night though when things get weird I don’t know if they should be in that environment..
Also sometimes I feel like LIB provides too much dopamine for someone that age. Imagine going back to 2nd grade the next week after?
Idk I’m still undecided, would love to hear your thoughts.
I know allowing kids won’t change and I’m not advocating for it necessarily
submitted by chefkurry2 to LightningInABottle [link] [comments]
Also sometimes I feel like LIB provides too much dopamine for someone that age. Imagine going back to 2nd grade the next week after?
Idk I’m still undecided, would love to hear your thoughts.
I know allowing kids won’t change and I’m not advocating for it necessarily
2024.05.28 23:21 pxisonyouth Writing NC letter & struggles with the past
Hi guys, I’ve (21F) been lurking/commenting on this thread but never made a post, and with where I am in my relationships with my parents, I feel it’d be super helpful for me to just talk before I send a NC letter.
Growing up, when I was very young, life was fine, and life was happy. I remember my dad making a concerted effort to stop drinking beer, which he did successfully. Our house was clean. We were happy. Nothing had really set in yet. If anything was going on, like arguments or anything, my parents must have hid it very, very well.
As I got older (not MUCH older - 3rd/4th grade?) our home became a hoarding mess. Mom just decided that she was the only one trying to keep the house clean and stopped one day. I cannot even remember the switch, quite honestly. She gradually started to collect and say, “Well I think I could make something out of this!” Or try to MacGyver something. Both of my parents contributed to this problem because they both JUST HAD SO MUCH STUFF. My dad took over the garage/outside, and my mom basically let indoors just go wild. I was very resentful as a middle schoolehigh schooler because I was never allowed to have anyone over. In some ways, I still am.
Even more mind-boggling to me is knowing the state your home is in, knowing you don’t allow your child to have anyone over ever, and continuing to DEMAND for me to come home. This is obviously a very abridged version of my childhood but the attempts to control me genuinely made me feel like I had just shit my pants and was so scared. Post high school graduation, the last “summer” you ever truly have, I had joined into a great friend group with some kids I had gone to school with and some I hadn’t, but they all worked at the same place together. I was the only one that didn’t, but fuck em, not related LOL.
I’d hang out with these kids practically every day I didn’t have work. I didn’t want to be home and would take every possible reason to leave. TO BE CLEAR: At this time, I was 17 almost 18, C/O 2020 which is a whole other can of worms, and EMPLOYED and enrolled in college. I literally dropped out of college because I could not focus in their home and the mess made Zooms mortifying. But I’m sure that wouldn’t be their fault either. I went to the beach with my friends, my dad told me not to but why? Why not? He did not like my best friend (who, ironically, is still in my life and he is not). My parents FLIPPED their shit. I was buying my own groceries, sending THEM money when they needed it, had my own phone bill, yet they were attempting to track me and CONTROLLING me for NO reason?
Side note: Parents would NOT allow me to get my license when I was 16/17. They deemed me “too irresponsible.” 🙂 The turmoil this created in me as no one could come over, and no, you can’t drive anywhere either. If you want to leave, someone has to take you away from here. It was a horrendous feeling and I do have a hard time forgiving them for it. There is no reason they could give me to justify it.
Shortly after this period in my life, probably a year or so later, I started dating my current BF. BF is from my hometown. It’s a small town where most people, especially people that have been there a while, know everyone else. Our parents know each other. BF lived less than 5 minutes from our house. I stayed over at their house one night, now ~19F, and I wake up (in the middle of the night) to my dad shouting at me to come home and he “can’t believe this.” Me, with license but no car (also a whole other can of worms), had to WAKE my boyfriend up and ask him to take me home at 3 in the morning. For fucking what? So they can have some control over the situation? I often regret not asking them “Why?”
Those two situations are very select but it was a constant between ages 16-19. Junior year of high school, my dad had an affair with a crackhead and moved out. It was a whole shit show and my mom suddenly became very open about her sex life and told me about a one night stand she had and how much she liked him….while also constantly bawling over my dad. I know she was going through something, the hardest thing your partner can do in a relationship, my dad did. The whole time period makes me feel yucky. Like I did something wrong. I just heard too much.
My parents are big arguers, and co-dependent on one another. From 13-19, I felt pretty responsible for their relationship. My sister is 5 years older so she was out of the house already when most of this was happening. My parents would stick me in the middle of whatever argument they were having and use me as a middleman/mediator. A TEENAGER. I eventually realized that they were putting me in a lose-lose-lose situation. If I think Mom’s right, Dad will be mad at me; if I think Dad’s right, Mom will be mad at me; if I don’t give a response at all, they’re BOTH mad at me! I took the latter more often than not, and I also just stopped caring. In my NC letter, a line I have written is “How am I supposed to emotionally regulate my parents when I have no idea how to even regulate mine? And haven’t been shown an example of how to?”
My dad got cancer about two years after that, and another year later he was in remission. In 2021, I moved across the country for a seasonal job in Colorado. It was clean, it was peaceful, I could go wherever I wanted, and I didn’t have to tell them. I talked to them maybe once over the 6 months I was there. Then I had to move back in with them. It was horrendous and I never wanted to return back. I went to BF’s house every. single. night. I didn’t want to be with them. I couldn’t stand it. I couldn’t stand hanging out in their mess. I lived there, though, for a year, saving up money to move back across the country. BF and I did it a year ago. I have only talked to them once in this past year. In the one time, they threatened a wellness check.
Over this past year, BF’s dad would occasionally ask/tell me my dad wanted me to call him. It would always give me that same “I’m gonna shit myself” feeling. I guess I know the term “flying monkey” now but I don’t really think that fits BF’s dad. He usually is just trying to help. It never really escalated more than that. More recently, though, my dad called BF’s dad 3+ times until he answered. I truthfully have no idea what he said to BF’s parents but BF’s mom told me he sounded “heartbroken.” After we got off the phone, I told BF I think my dad is getting to them, and I need to shut this shit down ASAP because that is an insane boundary for me.
Side, side note: I was working 40+ hours a week, dad sick, mom unemployed, and they’d go gamble almost every night. A lot of mornings, they would still be gone by the time I got up and left for work. We were also broke, and they asked me for money for my car insurance…THAT WASN’T PAID.
This is mainly for ranting/making some sense of things, but I do have questions if anyone has been in a boat like this. How do I handle relationships I want to keep within the family? Because my parents are the only ones I don’t want part of. I figure me not wanting my figurative children to be around them or in their house is the most tell-tale sign for that choice. How do I truly try to get this pain across to my BF? I don’t think he understands that this is something I will be dealing with for the rest of my life. He tells me to talk to my dad because if it was him, he’d be heartbroken. I tell him that he would never make the choices my dad did. But how do you explain to someone who has never really been in a situation like that? I love him, I know he’s not trying to stoke the fire and it’s not his fault he doesn’t know. Part of me is too embarrassed to tell him the full extent of it (hoarder house etc) because…it is embarrassing. But maybe that’s just the necessary answer.
I’ve been really grateful for this community and I can sleep so much better at night knowing I am not the only one going through this. Thank you guys so much 🥹
EDIT: How in the world do you avoid becoming the monster you’re running from? Sitting on a huge stash of self-awareness?
submitted by pxisonyouth to EstrangedAdultKids [link] [comments]
Growing up, when I was very young, life was fine, and life was happy. I remember my dad making a concerted effort to stop drinking beer, which he did successfully. Our house was clean. We were happy. Nothing had really set in yet. If anything was going on, like arguments or anything, my parents must have hid it very, very well.
As I got older (not MUCH older - 3rd/4th grade?) our home became a hoarding mess. Mom just decided that she was the only one trying to keep the house clean and stopped one day. I cannot even remember the switch, quite honestly. She gradually started to collect and say, “Well I think I could make something out of this!” Or try to MacGyver something. Both of my parents contributed to this problem because they both JUST HAD SO MUCH STUFF. My dad took over the garage/outside, and my mom basically let indoors just go wild. I was very resentful as a middle schoolehigh schooler because I was never allowed to have anyone over. In some ways, I still am.
Even more mind-boggling to me is knowing the state your home is in, knowing you don’t allow your child to have anyone over ever, and continuing to DEMAND for me to come home. This is obviously a very abridged version of my childhood but the attempts to control me genuinely made me feel like I had just shit my pants and was so scared. Post high school graduation, the last “summer” you ever truly have, I had joined into a great friend group with some kids I had gone to school with and some I hadn’t, but they all worked at the same place together. I was the only one that didn’t, but fuck em, not related LOL.
I’d hang out with these kids practically every day I didn’t have work. I didn’t want to be home and would take every possible reason to leave. TO BE CLEAR: At this time, I was 17 almost 18, C/O 2020 which is a whole other can of worms, and EMPLOYED and enrolled in college. I literally dropped out of college because I could not focus in their home and the mess made Zooms mortifying. But I’m sure that wouldn’t be their fault either. I went to the beach with my friends, my dad told me not to but why? Why not? He did not like my best friend (who, ironically, is still in my life and he is not). My parents FLIPPED their shit. I was buying my own groceries, sending THEM money when they needed it, had my own phone bill, yet they were attempting to track me and CONTROLLING me for NO reason?
Side note: Parents would NOT allow me to get my license when I was 16/17. They deemed me “too irresponsible.” 🙂 The turmoil this created in me as no one could come over, and no, you can’t drive anywhere either. If you want to leave, someone has to take you away from here. It was a horrendous feeling and I do have a hard time forgiving them for it. There is no reason they could give me to justify it.
Shortly after this period in my life, probably a year or so later, I started dating my current BF. BF is from my hometown. It’s a small town where most people, especially people that have been there a while, know everyone else. Our parents know each other. BF lived less than 5 minutes from our house. I stayed over at their house one night, now ~19F, and I wake up (in the middle of the night) to my dad shouting at me to come home and he “can’t believe this.” Me, with license but no car (also a whole other can of worms), had to WAKE my boyfriend up and ask him to take me home at 3 in the morning. For fucking what? So they can have some control over the situation? I often regret not asking them “Why?”
Those two situations are very select but it was a constant between ages 16-19. Junior year of high school, my dad had an affair with a crackhead and moved out. It was a whole shit show and my mom suddenly became very open about her sex life and told me about a one night stand she had and how much she liked him….while also constantly bawling over my dad. I know she was going through something, the hardest thing your partner can do in a relationship, my dad did. The whole time period makes me feel yucky. Like I did something wrong. I just heard too much.
My parents are big arguers, and co-dependent on one another. From 13-19, I felt pretty responsible for their relationship. My sister is 5 years older so she was out of the house already when most of this was happening. My parents would stick me in the middle of whatever argument they were having and use me as a middleman/mediator. A TEENAGER. I eventually realized that they were putting me in a lose-lose-lose situation. If I think Mom’s right, Dad will be mad at me; if I think Dad’s right, Mom will be mad at me; if I don’t give a response at all, they’re BOTH mad at me! I took the latter more often than not, and I also just stopped caring. In my NC letter, a line I have written is “How am I supposed to emotionally regulate my parents when I have no idea how to even regulate mine? And haven’t been shown an example of how to?”
My dad got cancer about two years after that, and another year later he was in remission. In 2021, I moved across the country for a seasonal job in Colorado. It was clean, it was peaceful, I could go wherever I wanted, and I didn’t have to tell them. I talked to them maybe once over the 6 months I was there. Then I had to move back in with them. It was horrendous and I never wanted to return back. I went to BF’s house every. single. night. I didn’t want to be with them. I couldn’t stand it. I couldn’t stand hanging out in their mess. I lived there, though, for a year, saving up money to move back across the country. BF and I did it a year ago. I have only talked to them once in this past year. In the one time, they threatened a wellness check.
Over this past year, BF’s dad would occasionally ask/tell me my dad wanted me to call him. It would always give me that same “I’m gonna shit myself” feeling. I guess I know the term “flying monkey” now but I don’t really think that fits BF’s dad. He usually is just trying to help. It never really escalated more than that. More recently, though, my dad called BF’s dad 3+ times until he answered. I truthfully have no idea what he said to BF’s parents but BF’s mom told me he sounded “heartbroken.” After we got off the phone, I told BF I think my dad is getting to them, and I need to shut this shit down ASAP because that is an insane boundary for me.
Side, side note: I was working 40+ hours a week, dad sick, mom unemployed, and they’d go gamble almost every night. A lot of mornings, they would still be gone by the time I got up and left for work. We were also broke, and they asked me for money for my car insurance…THAT WASN’T PAID.
This is mainly for ranting/making some sense of things, but I do have questions if anyone has been in a boat like this. How do I handle relationships I want to keep within the family? Because my parents are the only ones I don’t want part of. I figure me not wanting my figurative children to be around them or in their house is the most tell-tale sign for that choice. How do I truly try to get this pain across to my BF? I don’t think he understands that this is something I will be dealing with for the rest of my life. He tells me to talk to my dad because if it was him, he’d be heartbroken. I tell him that he would never make the choices my dad did. But how do you explain to someone who has never really been in a situation like that? I love him, I know he’s not trying to stoke the fire and it’s not his fault he doesn’t know. Part of me is too embarrassed to tell him the full extent of it (hoarder house etc) because…it is embarrassing. But maybe that’s just the necessary answer.
I’ve been really grateful for this community and I can sleep so much better at night knowing I am not the only one going through this. Thank you guys so much 🥹
EDIT: How in the world do you avoid becoming the monster you’re running from? Sitting on a huge stash of self-awareness?
2024.05.28 23:20 Illustrious_Ice9290 Advice for incoming 1Ls: don’t necessarily “keep doing what you did before”
This might be advice for a niche group of people—those who didn’t put a considerable amount of effort into other higher education, but still got A’s/B’s. Especially if you’re KJD.
Before law school, I hadn’t done an assigned reading since middle school, if that. Accordingly, when we were told over orientation multiple times that, “if you gained acceptance into this place, you had to be doing something right; don’t change what you’re doing, it got you this far,” I took this advice at face value.
I read maybe a total of five cases over my first semester. I don’t, and never did historically, mention this to brag—in fact, I noticeably raised some red flags with and turned-off people I admitted this to in conversation.
I got two C’s, a B-, and a B my 1L Fall. Not great, right? That’s a GPA of ~2.4, putting you (or at least, me) in the bottom 25% of your class.
I won’t lie to you, you can (barely) coast through law school without trying, or reading the cases. If you got to law school without reading, you’ll probably at least pass. I even got a singular A second semester while still trying to shake that habit. But, you’ll be disappointed in yourself when you get back the grades that you earned, and wish you could go back and learn your lesson sooner. Not only that, but if you’re specifically going into big law/wanting to do clerkships, your summer (and subsequently post-grad) employment opportunities might be diminished.
I went through both STEM and Humanities tracks pre-law school. I can veritably say that law courses require a depth of textual understanding that has never been absolutely required of me in any of my prior education. AND, I’m here to say that if those previous habits didn’t sustain me in law school, they very likely might not sustain you either.
So, here is what I wish I did 0L summer, after coasting by through bachelors/masters courses, to prep me better for law school: - Start getting your eyes used to reading long stretches of text. Don’t choose anything law-related, unless that’s the kind of stuff you read before deciding on law school. Just read for enjoyment, and become aquatinted with the feeling of reading ~80+ pages at a time. - Take modular courses online, even if/especially if it doesn’t offer transferable credit or a certificate. Something within the fieldhouse of your interests is preferable, as well as something that has several assignments that don’t contribute toward your grade. Get used to doing (functionally) optional assignments for your own contentment, and not just that which is submitted for a grade.
I read Getting to Maybe alongside other often-recommended books for 0Ls/rising 1Ls. I think, however, that the advice in those are less relevant for a successful transition to law school than adapting to the real-world demands of such a path. You’ll find other threads giving out amazing advice for how to succeed in courses, but this is just a word of warning of what not to do for those (like me as a 0/1L) who think that it’s a 1:1 translation of the work you need to put in for this type of education.
submitted by Illustrious_Ice9290 to LawSchool [link] [comments]
Before law school, I hadn’t done an assigned reading since middle school, if that. Accordingly, when we were told over orientation multiple times that, “if you gained acceptance into this place, you had to be doing something right; don’t change what you’re doing, it got you this far,” I took this advice at face value.
I read maybe a total of five cases over my first semester. I don’t, and never did historically, mention this to brag—in fact, I noticeably raised some red flags with and turned-off people I admitted this to in conversation.
I got two C’s, a B-, and a B my 1L Fall. Not great, right? That’s a GPA of ~2.4, putting you (or at least, me) in the bottom 25% of your class.
I won’t lie to you, you can (barely) coast through law school without trying, or reading the cases. If you got to law school without reading, you’ll probably at least pass. I even got a singular A second semester while still trying to shake that habit. But, you’ll be disappointed in yourself when you get back the grades that you earned, and wish you could go back and learn your lesson sooner. Not only that, but if you’re specifically going into big law/wanting to do clerkships, your summer (and subsequently post-grad) employment opportunities might be diminished.
I went through both STEM and Humanities tracks pre-law school. I can veritably say that law courses require a depth of textual understanding that has never been absolutely required of me in any of my prior education. AND, I’m here to say that if those previous habits didn’t sustain me in law school, they very likely might not sustain you either.
So, here is what I wish I did 0L summer, after coasting by through bachelors/masters courses, to prep me better for law school: - Start getting your eyes used to reading long stretches of text. Don’t choose anything law-related, unless that’s the kind of stuff you read before deciding on law school. Just read for enjoyment, and become aquatinted with the feeling of reading ~80+ pages at a time. - Take modular courses online, even if/especially if it doesn’t offer transferable credit or a certificate. Something within the fieldhouse of your interests is preferable, as well as something that has several assignments that don’t contribute toward your grade. Get used to doing (functionally) optional assignments for your own contentment, and not just that which is submitted for a grade.
I read Getting to Maybe alongside other often-recommended books for 0Ls/rising 1Ls. I think, however, that the advice in those are less relevant for a successful transition to law school than adapting to the real-world demands of such a path. You’ll find other threads giving out amazing advice for how to succeed in courses, but this is just a word of warning of what not to do for those (like me as a 0/1L) who think that it’s a 1:1 translation of the work you need to put in for this type of education.
2024.05.28 23:11 PlasticMysterious622 Am I obsessed? Yes
 | submitted by PlasticMysterious622 to Scrollsaw [link] [comments] |
2024.05.28 22:58 thethreeseas1 Young Australians ease of access to porn, OK why not parent them better?
It was stated this morning on the news that the average age that children first access pornography is 11 in Australia.
I don't dispute the data. I agree with it. I'm in my late 30s and recall being on it in late 4th / 5th grade. Yes I got hooked on it (Another story).
They are talking about bringing porn literacy classes into schools to combat the issue. I believe that they should take a broader approach and get parents to become more aware of the issue. To me, parents of children are very ignorant of what children do online.
What are your thoughts ?
How old were you when you were exposed to it ?
How do you deal with this with your own kids ?
submitted by thethreeseas1 to AskAnAustralian [link] [comments]
I don't dispute the data. I agree with it. I'm in my late 30s and recall being on it in late 4th / 5th grade. Yes I got hooked on it (Another story).
They are talking about bringing porn literacy classes into schools to combat the issue. I believe that they should take a broader approach and get parents to become more aware of the issue. To me, parents of children are very ignorant of what children do online.
What are your thoughts ?
How old were you when you were exposed to it ?
How do you deal with this with your own kids ?