Have you ever found the key? Maybe it is on the table or under the sofa. Where is the key? Who hides the key?
Phrases that most people use nowadays, especially Gen Z, when communication is not communication-ing and the discussion is not giving, now, let’s dive into the importance of communication and its twin comprehensions.
Communication is a part of our daily lives, from buying groceries in the marketplace to arguing with your sister about who will be sitting next to the window, talking about your crushes at school with your friends, and answering your teacher's questions about the lesson she is teaching (it is only applicable if you know the answer or are listening, oops).
It is crucial to interact with others as successfully as possible, particularly in formal settings or events. As a result, you might think you're the smartest person there.Being able to communicate effectively is also advantageous since it is essential to developing your social skills, building relationships with both business and non-business associates, boosting your self-confidence, and being the person you want to be.
Despite their differences in culture, beliefs, and religion, it will bring individuals from many nations, areas, provinces, and cities together. In order to avoid disagreements over their own opinions and the circumstance in general, communication will serve as a bridge between two people who are generally very different from one another. The ideal way to bring these individuals together and foster positive relationships would be through communication.
Expressing our own feelings to our family, friends, and lovers. It takes communication, using your words to express how you like your dog more than your sister. writing a letter to express your genuine gratitude and love for your friends and lovers in this modern day. Also, there is non-verbal communication such as when you naturally raise your eyebrows when your sister tells you that she is prettier than you, when you hug your friends because you feel that you are the happiest person after you have not seen each other for a long time, and when you wave your hand to your lover who will be going to work. Communication is the key to expressing love and care for the people you choose, no matter what.
We are right! Communication is the key when looking for an answer; communication is the key when we want peace over conflict; communication is the key when we want to express something, even if it is hard to put in a word or say it. Is it still the key when communication is not communication-ing?
“I used to think communication was the key until I realized comprehension is.”
You can communicate all you want with someone but if they do not understand you or refuse to understand, communication is useless.

I took out a payday loan (I know better now, but was unemployed at the time and needed bills paid ASAP) a few years back in 2022 from Cash Central. I was never notified that the debt was sold, but noticed eventually that it was in collections on my credit report. Obviously, it's brought my score down to below 600, which isn't great. Not avoiding accountability; I know this was a massive shot in my own foot. I just am looking for advice on how to move forward.
The original amount of the principal was about $400 USD with a little over $100 in initial fees. I think I made one payment, refinanced w/ new fees as much as possible to buy time, and defaulted anyway. I did previously dispute the amount of the debt (through Experian website, which I know now was probably not the best course) the balance because my own records reflect that my bank account was drafted a few months after my last recorded payment for about half (roughly $270) of the amount at that time, which was back up to about $540. However, Cash Central does not have documentation of this payment nor does NCA. I still have my bank account records from November 2022 that show this amount was drafted and not returned to me. HOWEVER, Cash Central doesn't want to speak with me now that the debt is with National Credit Adjustors and I can no longer log into their portal to see details. NCA calls sometimes, but I'm not what to say/bring up since they have already previously denied that dispute. I don't know an account number, even, to log in with on their website. I'd like to handle this ASAP and can pay a lower amount, but I'd much prefer a pay-to-delete, which I've seen is a bit more difficult to achieve with NCA, though not impossible.
I had one friend suggest I dispute it and write something about the debt not meeting guidelines from the FCRA section 605B, though that section is about identity theft/fraud and that is not what happened in this case. I'm not trying to fraudulently claim fraud, lol, but this seems to be something micro-influencers are sharing through social media as a "credit score tip" that I'm sure could backfire, especially if enough people do it. The influencers tell them to list it with it not meeting the FCRA guidelines for reporting to credit bureaus, but avoid anything about the details of section 605B, and tend to get the collection removed entirely as a result. I'm willing to pay my debt, I just want it to be accurate. Not gonna go do that unless I'm informed otherwise that there is something I'm missing in reading that section of FCRA that applies to my situation.
Finally, before anyone asks: I no longer have the original documents. I had them saved to my desktop, but I cannot find them any longer. I'll do a deep dive on my PC again this evening to be 100% sure, but it looks like those files are gone. I messed up there as well, I know.

Hello friends of reddit. My husband (30M) and I (30F) have been married for 6 months and it is not going as expected. In the beginning, he made it clear that due to his religious beliefs that he did not to have sex before marriage. I agreed as I had horrible judgement in men and was not looking to get taken for another ride again.
Background on him: He comes from an extremely religious family (Baptist). Worked his own business with the family since he graduated high school. He has also lived with his parents and has never lived on his own other than a year in his parents other home before his accident (he fell 27ft and had to relearn to walk). No drinking no smoking, only spend time with family and outdoor activities. Background on me: While I come from an abusive traumatic family I am currently 5 years therapy strong working on myself as it is my responsibility not my partners. I went to college and lived on my own until covid lay offs and I had to move back home with my father, which wasnt ideal. I work full time and have my own business; I am very motivated.
As time progressed he changed his mind and we ended up sleeping together. I asked for us to move in together for a lil while before we got married. My parents (divorced) were not okay with that but I did not care. He told me that we would need to sit down and discuss the idea of moving in together with his parents. I said; "Why would we need to ask permission we are 30?" and he said that we would have to in order to save face. I said "I am not comfortable with discussing this with your family as it is not their business." He said we were not to move in together until we do. I told him if he forced me to meet with his parents then I was going to tell his mother that we have already had sex so there was no reason not to move in together. He never set up the meeting. We never moved in together. He is very close to his parents in my opinion to the point it is unhealthy. I watch as his dad undermines, belittles, and ignores his mother with a smile and charming laugh on his face until she is in complete submission. She admitted to me that while she was clipping coupons for the family, he was out spending all the money on machines / equipment that they did not need. She has cried to me in front of my husband about how she still needs to voice her opinion even though it is never listen to or goes the way she suggests. That was a red flag to me.
My now husband of mine and I started to plan out life together. He told me that he owns his own business and has 60 acres of property and wanted to build a life there. He promised me that we were going to work together and build a home that we can make a guest house and eventually build a bigger home. He wants it to be similar to a Lowcountry plantation. I was all for it, finally excited that I had someone I could create a life with that we both wanted and deserved.
That is when things turned. He started to move forward on building a home for us without a permit nor engineer drawings. Before he started, I told him that made me very uncomfortable and I need security to know this home is done correctly since he will be out of town a lot and I will be left alone in a town I know no one. That made him insulted and said this is how his father and family did their home and he just moved forward on building it himself. I begged, cried, and pleaded with him to please let's get the water and septic out there first and work on a budget of plans / permits to break ground. That I was not comfortable living that way, my father was a GC and taught me a lot of what needs to be done for a home to be an asset. He waved me off, told me that my father was just a carpenter. I cried for months over it and almost moved the wedding back a year. His father was behind the scenes telling him and motivating him to continue to do whatever he wanted to do regardless of how I felt. He finally heard me after I threaten to postpone the wedding and stopped construction and told me he would get a permit on the home and drawings before he did anything else.
The closer the wedding got, the difficult it became. I gave him my pay stubs, W2, and showed my assets to him up front. I showed all of my cards and asked to see his in return. He said he would and he never did. When I asked him more than once he would get annoyed with me. I started to get suspicious. I felt as if he was hiding something. So I did my own investigation. It turns out that his father and him own the property together in a way that if one passes the other gets it and he only owns 20% of the business he claimed was his. I was stunned. Everything he told me was half truths. I brought it to his attention many times and he acted like he told me already. I told him I knew the truth and he said it wasn't a big deal and I am making something out of it that it isnt. If his father had more respect for his wife and for women, I would not be this concerned. His father throws trash on the ground and ignores rules and regulations while having a problem with authority at his own home. Now everything he doesnt want at his house is being thrown over to my husband's property (which is his too and he has a right to do what he wants). Being in that type of chaotic environment along with the sense of having someone stomp on my boundaries for me would be extremely triggering and something that I will not be able to do. He is already throwing trash and leaving debris and junk all over the property. I communicated my feelings and got met with resentment, anger, and denial from my husband. He told me that it was not going to be that way. He also called me controlling bc instead of spending 25,000 on permits / our home, he spend it on a brand new truck (he has two other trucks). I was so upset and said how could he spend that much money on a toy when he hasn't even provided a home for our family. He was texting his dad about the truck behind my back and he was motivated to do whatever he wanted to do regardless of what I thought bc I am "controlling".
I told him from day one that I am a career woman, that I am not going to be solely responsible for the household and I am not his mother and I will not pick up after him. I expect things to be 50/50 in finances and in house work until we figure out what works best for us. He said he agreed and was very happy with that. I then told him in order for me to feel comfortable moving out to his 60 acres of land, that it would need to be solely in his name and he would need to get a permit and engineer drawings. He told me as soon as we were married that he would move forward with that.
With all these red flags, I continued to move forward with the wedding as he promised me the world. He kept dragging his feet on the home construction and it was failing to be completed before our wedding. His dad was telling him to take his time it is not that big of a deal. 4 months before our wedding, his family and him expected me to live in an unpermited non CO having shed like house, with no power, water, septic, nor appliances, an empty shell, no sheetrock (his father made his mother live like that). In complete distress I begged my father to do a lease to own with one of his rental properties for me so that my husband and I would have a place to live after we got married since the home was in no condition to live in. My father begrudgingly agreed and then told me to not Marry him. I did always. My family ended up ruining the wedding for me and causing our special day to not be as special.
Fast forward a few months when it was time for us to pay our lease to own payment. He was late every month, got angry at me for asking for his part of the money, I asked him to help with the chores and he would get annoyed with me, he has not mowed the grass once (my father and I have). I can count on my hand the times hes raked the yard and done dishes. He makes double the amount of money I made but I am writing the checks for the bills. I am just asking for his portion and he told me that I am treating him like a roommate not like a husband / wife. I asked him to explain and he couldn't. I finally got fed up and told me to give me 4 checks signed so when he is out of town for work and I need to pay the bills I can. He handed me the checks and they had him and HIS MOTHER on the account. Admitted, I lost my cool. I was overwhelmed with the amount of involvement his parents had in his assets and life. He has made me feel like he has lied to me. I told him as long as my boundaries are disrespected and I have no say in our home and our life that I do not want anything to do with their property. He would get mad and say it was his and id remind him, no it is not. It belongs to him and his father. He said it is his home and he is going to build it the way he wanted.
A few weeks after that argument he completely distant himself from me. He was out till 8pm every night for weeks and I kept asking him where he was. All he said was "working". A few weeks later, I finally go out to the property to see a full blown house. Behind my back he was working on that home putting roofing, plumbing, tile, siding, everything! He told me we were going to work on this together. I was so upset, everything is half ass done. He let me pick out nothing. I called him on it and he denied it. Come to find out him and his father had been working on it behind my back. While I was struggling to pay our bills he was using his money to continue on building on the home without drawings, permits, engineering, nothing. He couldn't give me money for our house hold bills, but he could spend thousands and thousands on something he promised me he was not going to do. Then he proceeded to tell me what "we" were going to give his father a $2,000.00 fish finder for a present. I told him is he out of his mind we can not afford that (mind you he gave me nothing for my birthday though he did bake me a cake and it was sweet). I said you are going to spend that much money on a gift and you didnt even get your wife anything for her birthday? he said "you got an engagement ring, that was expensive enough" I said "so bc you gave me an engagement ring, that means you do not have to purchase anything else for me as a gift?" he just waved me away. I said you never discussed this transaction with me and you are saying "we" are getting it. He said "well when I said 'we' I meant me and my mother."
I just stared at him. He considers WE as him and his parents. Finally got him into marriage counseling and it does not seem to be helping. He has missed 4 sessions already bc he chose work over me. He is pulling away from me completely, no affection, no sex (I did not know he had an issue brushing his teeth so now I cringe in fear of getting dumpster breath anytime we are intimate). This was NOT like this during our dating time.
I feel like I am drowning and I have made a HUGE mistake. Typing this out makes me feel guilty for telling the truth and maybe I am being controlling and overbearing like his parents are saying? This is why I am coming to you people of reddit.
I feel like I am in a polyamorous relationship. I feel like I have escaped the control of my family only to end up in a place where I am controlled by another man that I am not even MARRIED TO. I feel like I am a ship with two anchors that are my parents, when I got married I thought he was going to help captain my ship, not be another anchor on my vessel to weigh me down. All my friends have noticed that I have changed and I am not my normal self.
How can I get my husband self reflect on how he is treating me and be dedicated to me and not his parents?
Am I out of line? is this weird? Am I expecting too much?
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post. I love my husband very much but I am stuck.

My STBXW is masterful with projection, darvo, covert attacks. And she’s skilled enough to not make it over the top obvious, so she always has plausible deniability.
We have temporary orders and a final hearing this fall. Hoping to get some or all of the issues settled before a trial, but planning as if we’ll definitely end up in a trail situation.
In a recent motion she claimed that at an exchange with our kid, in a public place, I yelled at her, called her names, and made her cry to the point of where she couldn’t drive home. That literally did NOT happen at all. In fact it was the other way around.
First of all, our kid wasn’t around where they could see or hear any of this. Second, She was laughing at me, saying she was going to win X and Y in the divorce, etc. I calmly asked her a question like “well, you say that we both agree on X, so all you have to do is have your lawyer write a letter stating we agree and we can at least settle on that part, will you agree to do that?.” And she’d deflect and not answer, and when I’d calmly just ask if she agreed we’d do that she escalated her tone until she was irate, screaming at me, calling me names, etc. I calmly just ended the conversation, walked away and got my kid. End of story. BUT she flipped the entire narrative around and made up all sorts of shit.
We are in a state where it’s two party consent to record, and our judge said if we record he won’t allow it as evidence, so while, sure, I could do so god forbid cops ever got involved or DV was claimed i could have that to cover my ass, but that aside — it’s always her word against mine. And the judge has shown sympathy towards her a few times without any proof because she has painted me as this crazy angry person, when I am not, never have been, and in fact that’s who she is.
How do you deal with this nonsense?
After that one incident I refuse to talk to her in public except “hello” and exchange kid stuff when necessary. I put all communications in the parenting app. Etc.
But she’s proven she will just make shit up to suit her. So even if I don’t say anything to her, but we’re in the same place for our kid, she’s apt to say I yelled at her or something.
Anyone deal with this successfully or have advice outside of the typical parameters?

Below is the email I today received from Yotta.
I contacted FDIC. They said contact SPIC (Securities Investment Protection Corporation). SPIC said contact FINRA (Financial Industry Regulatory Authority). FINRA gave me this ID# for Synapse - 137662. Use this ID# to file a claim here: https://www.finra.org/investors/need-help/file-a-complaint
EMAIL I received FROM YOTTA today To give more clarity on the current situation, we were notified that Lineage Bank, member FDIC, halted ACH processing on May 7th for all Synapse Brokerage accounts - Yotta customers hold accounts with Synapse Brokerage. These events have left Synapse Brokerage without an ACH processor. We were also recently notified by Evolve Bank & Trust, member FDIC, that they would be halting all payment processing including debit and credit cards effective immediately.
Ultimately this means there are not currently any banking services or methods available for access to funds. We understand the importance of this matter and are working around the clock to get ACH and debit and credit processing for all accounts restored, which will enable customers to withdraw their funds.
As stated in all brokerage account agreements, customer funds in the Synapse Brokerage Program are deposited into accounts at a network of member FDIC banks. Funds held in these accounts are eligible for FDIC insurance.
We are in contact with federal regulators and are doing everything we can to get ACH processing reinstated as soon as possible.
It would be helpful for the FDIC to hear from you about how lack of access to ACH is impacting you. The phone number for their complaint line is 1-877-275-3342 or to file an e-complaint follow the steps here:
https://ask.fdic.gov/fdicinformationandsupportcentes/?language=en_US

In December 2022 I got into a fender bender.
I was on the feeder of my towns main highway, in the only turn lane (no turn on red), I was the front car in the lane so first to go, light was red. My light turned green, I went, a couple seconds later I flipped my blinker on to move over to the middle lane, made it to the middle lane, flipped it on immediately to get over the the farthest left lane, I barely started to move over (not out of the middle lane at all yet) when an Audi came up against the side, swiping up against my car, taking out my mirror and than branching off to the farthest left lane while I quickly swerved to the right lane. We pulled over into a local parking lot, I was shaken up, 20 years old, never been in a wreck. The guy got out of his car and said no need to call the police as nobody was hurt. I was dumb enough to believe him. We swapped insurance info and went home.
A few weeks later after gathering information from us both, his agency determined I was at fault, by their exact words, “it is he said, she said since we have no witnesses or police report, and he is our client, we are siding with him because he said his light was green.” They also claimed damage to his car indicated that it was my fault because he had damage to his driver side indicating he hit the median because of me? He claimed he must’ve been in my blind spot. He hit the median because when he swiped me we both initially swerved the opposite way (him being into the far left lane with the median) to avoid further damage to our cars.
My light was definitely the green one but I was young and didn’t want to fight this so I said fine whatever and left it at that. I was the first one to go after my light turned green, the cars coming from the opposite side shouldn’t have been going because it would’ve been red. I should’ve been the only one on that road at that point in time but I’m ASSUMING he made the yellow/red light by going fast and couldn’t stop in time to avoid hitting me completely so he swiped me trying to avoid a collision. This is just based off my knowledge of the road/light because I use it often and people run the yellow constantly.
Now, over a year later, MY old insurance agency is calling because HIS filed for arbitration.
How concerned should I be?? What if they still claim his light was green? What if I’m accused of lying about this?

I hope I do not sound like a jerk here, but ... more and more I feel that these classes are more trouble than they are worth. I'd welcome it if someone made a case for their existence.
Here's the claim: we are (almost?) always better off just working with f-strings and format instead of working with these classes. Here is my rationale:

• Concatenation: Most recently, I have been fighting with trying to concatenate various `Message` and `PromptTemplate` classes. Sometimes this works, sometimes it fails at runtime. This is made worse by the fact that static type-checking doesn't detect this prior to runtime.
• Type hints: the above illustrates a problem with these classes that extends beyond them and is pervasive in Langchain. There are a lot of type hints, and there are type failures, but the type hints don't help. The type specifications are often so loose that type checking tools cannot warn me about errors to come. This is related to another pervasive problem:
• The use of opaque objects and loose typing causes many problems in development with Langchain. When I try to write my own code to extend langchain behavior I often find that I have to handle many cases that have the potential to cause errors because of loose typing. For example, anything handling input going into an LLM or ChatModel must handle PromptValue, str, Sequence of MessageLikeRepresentation and dict s with unknown sets of keys. When I process those Sequences I must then deal with BaseMessage, str, Tuple[str,str] and Dict[str, Any]. I apologize for being cranky, but these type hints seem more aimed at ensuring that type checkers never raise errors, rather than aimed at helping the programmer write correct code. The type checker is a tool, not an oracle to be worshipped.
• PromptTemplates work extremely poorly when they must accommodate code as template-fillers. The curly braces in code confuse prompt handling no end.

Looping back to the hypothesis: If I try to assemble a prompt in stages by plugging values in over and over, the use of PromptTemplate and Message objects makes my life more difficult and costs me hours of debugging. My recent alternative is simply to assemble together ordinary strings, using format as necessary, until the last minute before they are needed, at which time I wrap them in PromptTemplate.from_template() so that they can be put in an LCEL chain expression.
IMO this indicates that the layers and layers of complex types and meta-classes are more trouble than they are worth. I'm willing -- indeed hoping! -- that someone will prove me wrong. How does my experience align with that of other langchain users?

So I've asked (and paid) my gp to write a letter to update the gender marker on my passport. They said that they arent sure that they can do it (though will refund me if not). They said it could take up to 4 weeks, but its usually done about a week, I asked nearly 3 weeks ago. They haven't confirmed yet that they won't do it, but I'm not hopeful. I was wondering if there's any other options if the gp can't.
Switching to a better gp isn't an option unfortunately (I've moved since and if I register with a new gp, I will no longer be in the catchment area for indigo where they reffered me. I still work in and commute to Manchester a lot so my gp being there isn't a problem). I have an gendercare appointment w/Dundas in September so I could get one off him if I must, but Ideally I'd rather sort my passport out ASAP. Is there any other way I can get a letter sorted? Or does anyone have any ideas of how I can convince my gp to do the letter? I've given them the exact phrasing it needs so there's no way they don't know how to do it.

R-squared values: Linear Regression: 0.8401621913740709 Polynomial Regression: 0.9161966003792115 Exponential Regression: 0.922505755755209 Projected next outcome using damped Exponential Regression: 15916.26589649187 

Darshane Punyam, Sparshane Paapam 

10k loan-360/month 15k loan-380/month 38k loan 500/month I wrecked my car two years ago during the COVID car chip pricing peak. Well I worked in manufacturing and the commute was two hours. I worked at an ev plant so we had free charging and when I hit that deer I got a nice chuck of change for my car. Got 1k more than when I bought it five years ago. Again, this is when used cars were more expensive than new..or at least the same. I needed a car asap and I needed on that was reliable. The only dealership, if you call it that, that had reliable cars for sell with zero markup was Tesla.
I opted for the cheapest model..I got free charging it was a win. Well life got in the way and working 70 hour weeks was hitting the family hard. It was a EV start to hours were long.
So now I have a remote job. I went from making about 98k to 67k. But mental health and family life is better.
I also work part time when I want at a hardware store and do DoorDash when I’m bored to try and chisel the debt. I’d say i get about 10 to 15k a year from doing that. So current income is approximately 80k
Here’s the thing now I have a remote job I really don’t need the car now. I also just bought a car for my son(my partners old car she just got a new one) I didn’t want my son learning to drive in a Tesla so I wanted to get a car for him before he had his permit.
Well now I have my Tesla and his car.
Part of me is saying to sell the Tesla use his car until he is 16 then get my own car.
Problem is now the chip shortage is over, even with the down payment I made, knob is saying it’s worth 28k to 33k… so to be safe maybe I could get 30k from it. But I owe 38k.
I don’t know if it is smart to take the 8k loss or even how to go about doing it.
It seems silly to have two vehicles when one is not in use and I’m in debt trying to get out.
I just am conflicted in taking that big of a loss..I guess I should write down my current Interest est charges then add it up for two years and see if it’s more than 8k.
Hell I’d even save in insurance as well.
Just wanted your thoughts.
I’m already selling my Harley should get about 5 to 4k for that.

I get a lot of messages asking about my cancer, so before I get to my story: I highly recommend visiting BCAN.org and asking to be paired up in their survivor to survivor program. Every diagnosis is different and the survivor to survivor program pairs you with someone with similar age, gender, and diagnosis, so you can ask all about their experience. I have enjoyed volunteering with the program and the newly diagnosed that I speak to seem to as well.
My story:
In March of 2020, I was diagnosed with Stage III muscle-invasive bladder cancer. Leading up to that diagnosis I had recurring episodes of extremely painful urination for nearly two years. Not a drop of blood in my urine. The episodes were becoming longer and more frequent. I had urgency and an extreme pain that had me calling out sick from work. It was pure misery and by the time I was diagnosed it was actually a relief.
The test I urge anyone reading this to get is a urine cytology. I am not a doctor and this is not medical advice. In my experience the urine cytology saved my life. It's a cheap "pee cup" test you can get at any urologist's office. More info here. My easy to remember rhyme is: if it burns when you pee, get a urine cytology.
Up until that test, doctors had been meandering down a path that was not focused on cancer. I was 33 years old (37M now) and due to my young age they didn't consider cancer. I had been in some mountain bike accidents with pelvic trauma so I was misdiagnosed with Pudendal Neuralgia. Symptoms matched but the treatment offered no relief.
I did my urine cytology. 15 minutes later "Atypical cells" led to a bladder scope and I was looking at my tumors in the urologist's office. The tumors were biopsied and I was scheduled for TURBT. This is where my stage III diagnosis was given. I felt immediate relief from the painful urination after tumor removal. The tumors were pressing on my ureters so it felt like kidney stones all the time. We immediately started chemo and my doctors began telling me I would lose my bladder. I did MVAC chemo for four rounds over the summer. This was very intense: what you think about when people say chemo. Lost my hair--gained weight which is not uncommon--and overall felt like shit. After that I was given a few weeks to recover and then had a radical cystectomy with neobladder diversion in August of 2020. This was not an easy decision but the prognosis was best. I tend to trust the data.
SHOUTOUT to my medical team: Dr. Bupathi & Dr. Monticelli of Rocky Mountain Cancer Centers; as well as Dr. Shandra Wilson my urologist and surgeon. Their skills and expertise assuaged all my concerns and made me feel so confident. THANK YOU SO MUCH. For those reading: get a good team; ask lots of questions; and don't be afraid to get multiple opinions. I keep several journals, which help a lot and I'll detail that at the bottom of this post*
Recovery from the neobladder surgery was the hardest part. I had a foley catheter and "grenade" for six weeks or so. My cath bag looked like a bag of red wine due to blood. They walk you around a lot to recover faster. It involved a lot of bed-rest intermixed with short walks. I think I was out of the office for at least a month. I am in generally very good physical shape and even several weeks after this procedure it was hard to walk more than 1/4 mile.
From there I thought I was cancer free. I lead my life with my family**. Here is what saved my life again: Signaterra testing. Dr. Bupathi had these tests scheduled every six weeks. It tracks genetic cancer markers in your blood. The test results look like the stock market except you want it to go down. After several months we noticed it was rising again. We ordered a PET scan, found enlarged lymph nodes, and determined my cancer had returned (or never left). I began a second chemo regiment followed by immunotheraphy (that I just completed yesterday!!!). CisGem chemo was quite difficult. The C in MVAC stands for cisplatin and it's generally one of the hardest drugs to tolerate. After a few difficult rounds we switched to carboplatin and it became much more tolerable. After that I did two years of Bavencio/Avelumab. My Natera test results showed that my cancer had dropped to untraceable levels during chemo, so I effectively beat it before starting the PDL1 inhibitor therapy. However, my team strongly encouraged me to complete the immuno. To me, it felt like putting out a campfire: add water, stir, add water, stir. You gotta make sure it's really gone!
The bavencio PDL1 therapy caused me a lot of mood swings and sometimes caused immune system flare ups (i.e. "immuno flu"). For the physical flare ups I used prednisone, as needed. I tried to do so sparingly as it basically cancels out your treatment. The mood swings were the worst. I would often be despondent and depressed for a few days after treatment. Other times, I'd feel no mood alterations. Most often, I'd be extremely irritable for about a week after treatment (treatments were every two weeks so it was very difficult).
I'm now two years cancer free and beginning my recovery from the immunotherapy treatments. I am so happy to live in an age of modern medicine. Within my lifetime many cancers will become manageable diseases--it appears to me that bladder cancer already has. Reach out to BCAN support groups and DM me if my post didn't answer a question of yours. Good luck! You got this!
*Journaling helped me tremendously. I had three journals (google docs). The first was an overall journal detailing my doctor visits. The second was a symptom journal. The third was an insurance journal/spreadsheet. The first journal served almost as a blog, which I shared with close friends and family. That way I didn't have to have the same conversation over and over. It's nice to have family and friends interested, but it does wear at you when you have to tell the same doctor visit over and over to people. This cut down on those discussions and allowed me to have more enjoyable calls with well-wishers. The second journal I would write down daily side effects and 1-10 pain scales. This was extremely important because I could bring it up with doctors and I wouldn't have to remember how I felt, I could look it up. It also helped me understand insidious side effects that take months to reveal themselves. This was the most important journal and kept me sane. There are soooo many side effects and when you start a cancer treatment program you often have no choice-- so why read them? Well this journal would help me understand when something was a side effect. Often just knowing that it wasn't you it was the drug would have a calming effect. The third journal was so I could fight insurance and get what I deserve. Insurance companies try to reduce payouts through exhaustion. They want you to give up. By documenting your experience you give yourself ammunition when you have to escalate a claim or file an appeal. You have everything laid out in an organized manner. You can get it out of your head and onto a spreadsheet so that you don't think about it when you go to bed at night. I had to file appeals several times, sometimes with Colorado Division of Insurance and my record-keeping was a tremendous boon to my case. Don't pay a bill as soon as you get it! Wait until you get the claim record from your insurance company and make sure the number on the bill matches what the insurance company told you to pay. If you cut that check wrong, you'll seldom get that money back!
**Neobladders do not have musculature like your normal bladder. I had several very severe bladder infections--a few that led to hospitalization. During the first 18 months or so, I was not catheterizing becuase I was under the impression that my new bladder worked. I peed constantly; however, I was retaining over one liter of urine at all times. This urine kept becoming infected and putting me in miserable situations. Under my urologists advice, I began cathing and immediately felt great. I lost nearly 10 lbs in "water weight" and no longer have any urgency issues. I can sleep through the night, but often will cath around five hours into the night just so I can sleep in later. On average I cath about once every three hours. It's not painful when done correctly. It's honestly just tedious. However, after all of this the only way my life is abnormal now is my cathing. I can swim, climb, play with my son and do any physical activity; it just takes longer to pee now. I'll take that win!

Long post alert: I matched with someone on a dating app last month who is from another country but lives in mine currently for 3-4 years. He knows about my culture very well. We have a lot of things in common. His work is soccer related and I'm a huge fan of the sport. Both of us love gaming. Both of us have a lot of similar interests and are sapiosexuals. He lives in another city and comes to mine sometimes. We spoke for a month before I decided to visit him. I intuitively felt it was safe to stay with him and that he's a good man. This weekend, I went there and we had an amazing time. We both are shy people but together it felt like we knew each other for years. We couldn't keep our hands off each other the evening we met. Sx was great and he appreciated me the way I was, flaws and everything. We cuddled, kissed, talked about life, work, did and said silly things and what not. I could be myself with him. I felt extremely safe with him. The way he looked at me and smiled, especially when I was in his arms, was magical. I definitely saw something for me in his eyes. 50-51 hours felt like everything was perfect. On my last day there, we cuddled and watched a documentary before dinner that I had cooked for him (I hate cooking) and he liked it too. He can't eat spicy so I made it less spicy. We were having dinner and talking about the spicy things he doesn't like to eat in my country. One of them is my absolute favourite thing so I just said it depends where you eat it because I make it less spicy at home. Suddenly, he started getting annoyed, raised his voice and said things like I am not even trying to look through his perspective and when I tried to defend myself, he asked me to stop interrupting him all the time (could be because I was leaving and he was feeling something. I don't know). I controlled my tears as I was getting angry and finished my dinner silently. He ordered ice cream for us but after that I went completely silent. I picked up plates, cleaned up everything, packed my bags as I was leaving early next day and went in the balcony to calm myself down. I went to his room to get something I had left there and he asked 'everything okay honey?' and I just replied hmm and left. We didn't talk after that because he fell asleep while I was trying to calm down. None of us ate the ice cream. Later I went to his room, turned off his TV, hugged him and slept besides him. He held my hand and slept. Next morning he had to leave for work too so we were going to leave together. We didn't speak a word except when he asked if I'd have coffee. We didn't hug or kiss like we did on other mornings. When we left and went downstairs, his cab was there and then we hugged. He only asked me to let him know when I get in the bus. When I got in the bus, I messaged him 'In the bus. Thanks for everything'. He replied 'Take care 😘' I reminded him a few things like to eat the leftover dinner, use up things I had opened to make it, etc. And then I apologised for not talking to him that night and explained that I didn't want to hurt him because I'd have said terrible things if I had opened my mouth. He replied 'No problem *****' 'It was nice to see you' I replied same here. Then he said 'Take care of yourself ☺️☺️' after which I asked him if we'd meet again because the way we left things didn't feel right and also thanked him for making me the happiest I was in years. He just replied 'Let's see how things are going'. It is also important to mention that he's moving to another country soon in June or July (doesn't know where yet) but now he knows I can move too. I didn't reply after that because I didn't know what to say. No honey, baby or anything. I cried the entire way home. He just liked my cat's picture I uploaded on Instagram story after I reached home because he knew I was missing her. There hasn't been any communication after that (yesterday) although he had mentioned before that it's a busy week for him. I can't stop thinking about him, his face, his eyes, his smell and his smile. And another weird thing: he has these muscle jerks in his sleep and now I have them too somehow. My brother told me this.
Now that you know what is happening, I need something to fix our relationship. I really thought it could be a long-term thing for us because we were perfect together. I'm ready to move wherever he's going as my work is flexible. Things suddenly became weird after that dinner. I tried to communicate yesterday but after those replies, he felt disconnected. I want us to work but I want him to approach because I've done my part. I just know it wasn't just a hookup for us because none of us are into it. His birthday is this week and I wanted to send something handmade (which he really needs in his house) and write a letter to him. Is that a good idea? I'm relatively a baby witch and started 4 months ago. Is there a specific spell or something that would help me? At the moment, I only have some crystals, a small altar for aphrodite, coloured candles, bayleaves and some other spices. Any help and advice is appreciated.
Thank you for reading!

(UK)Just want to preface by saying : I know I have made many mistakes here, please keep in mind that I am used to working on zero hours contracts and I know I was very naive and stupid going into this job.
I recently started a new part time position as a group fitness instructor. I am a self funded post grad student, so I jumped at the chance to earn some extra money through my hobby. In the interview I was told that if I got the job I would be hired as an independent contractor so I would have to cover my own tax, insurance and training - which sounded pretty unfair but I wanted to do the job and figured it couldn’t cost that much. I also had no idea what it meant to be an independent contractor as I have never been self-employed! I signEd a contract that was sent to me by the business - which included the set rate that they would pay for classes. I didn’t question the content of the contract at the time as it seemed similar to other zero hours contracts I had been in before with set rates for work completed- and again- I did not know what it meant to be self employed.
I noticed some issues with these rates - it seemed that instructors were really only being paid for half the work that they were doing. The contract also required instructors to transport the equipment required for classes in different venues and would be responsible and liable for any damage that occurred to it - but we do not use our own equipment - it’s the businesses. I did some googling which led me to the HMRC CEST test - which said that I was employed based on the information I put in. The more I look into it the more it seems like I am not really self - employed , although I was told I am. I have to deal with all the monetary implications of an independent contractor with none of the freedom. I do not have my own business, nor do I want one!
Stipulations of my contract prevent me from freely working as an instructor with competitors of the business or advertising my services to anyone outside of the business during the contract or after its termination without their permission, I am not supposed to stray from a teaching format that they provide and they claim class formats or innovations that instructors make for their classes as the businesses intellectual property. I work at venues that they decide on and at hours dictated by the class schedule. As far as I can tell, these stipulations all contradict the criteria for independent contractors - I feel like an employee of the business! I really enjoy the actual work but it’s losing me money and time that I should be dedicating to my degree.
I dont want to take legal action against my employer and I do want to keep instructing but I also believe this contract is ridiculous, I want to be able fight some of this and be paid fairly for the amount of labour I am putting in! So I want to know - is this contract legally binding given that it states I am an independent contractor but contradicts itself with its terms? Could I be persecuted for going against it? Could I be persecuted for false self - employment?? Any advice as to how I should proceed would be much appreciated!

27M Accident happened mid January, neck brace for 2 months, physical therapy twice a week since brace was removed. 4 X-rays have been done with nothing concerning to the spine doctor. Meds have been naproxen and muscle relaxers as needed. But they don’t help much, just make me pass out which is fine because sleeping sucks.
This most recent visit the spine doc referred me to a pain management program. I asked if it would be a good idea to schedule an MRI for me before starting pain management to sort of track the progress and maybe see if something was missed (I was reading that an MRI would show more than an Xray so I figured I’d ask) and he kind of shut it down right away saying it wouldn’t show anything anyway and that it was a VERY expensive thing to have done…
Me: but I’d like to have one to see if anything is seriously wrong because the pain isn’t improving after all this time
Doc: that won’t be necessary, the X-rays show no signs of fracture and I don’t believe there is any neurological damage from the tests we’ve done, is there anything else?
Me: so I can’t request an MRI?
Doc: you can request one but it probably won’t get approved, and I don’t think insurance would cover it, and I wouldn’t (he mumbled something here but I couldn’t hear him)
Me: so your denying writing me for one?
Doc: how about we continue this up front (very defensive when he said this)
Then he walked me to the door and didn’t follow me to the front desk… it was the strangest thing ever lol I just honestly didn’t understand why he was so quick to shut it down and when he mentioned insurance it just confused me because my insurance definitely covers it.
TLDR: doc said no to MRI, I’m still in pain but nothing shows on Xray. Been seeing this doc since the accident, considering a second opinion but not sure if I’m overthinking things

One of the letters in here talked about how they found their love had been writing letters to them for months and they were able to share that together.
I think that's such a beautiful sentiment. I imagine meeting one day, when we've been together for a while and we're having the most romantic and perfect date. And I will present you with this gift of love I have been slowly crafting since the day I met you.
Each word a stitch in the fabric of my love for you.
Each letter weaving the rich tapestry of our story.
I will handwrite all of the letters of beautiful paper, and careful calligraphy staining the pages of letters that were once unsent, made real.
Even the ones that scorned my heart, so you can see this has been an emotional journey of love even through the pain, at times. Because even through the pain, even though you drove me nuts at times, I still loved you. I couldn't help it. Because at the end of the day, I don't blame you, at least I don't blame you alone. My actions were as much to blame for the circumstances that caused pain. Because I know this pain was not one sided.
When I envision this romantic date, I envision it as being so emotional, and we both have tears in our eyes because the gravity of how it feels to be truly loved and seen by another for all that you are. Because we can share the wholeness of ourselves for the first time with a person who's capable of recieving it.
Because we won't feel so alone.
I can't wait until that day, so I shall continue to pass the time writing letters to you my heart.

So I recently got a message from someone on Psych Today and the way that this person worded things kind of set off red flags and I was wondered what others thought on this are.
"I had a couple questions about your services! Would you be able to tell me how much my insurance would cover, are you able to diagnose, and are you able to write ESA letters? Thanks so much in advance!"
Now I will write ESA letters I've wrote a couple them for a couple clients but I have to know the clients and have good rapport with them. It just seemed off to me that they mentioned it first thing off the bat. Would love ya'lls thoughts on this.

The Man From Earth.
(TLDR Version): rock solid, well worth the watch, great acting and story telling. Had me begging for more. 9.5/10.
Review. I absolutely loved The Man From Earth. The comments that call it a “Masterpiece” are not far off. Given it is a low budget movie taking place in largely the same room, it just goes to show how far solid acting and superb story telling can go. The main character portrays John Oldman, the 14,000 year old man superbly. The convorsation seems authentic, though there are moments where you can tell it is a low budget film. The questions and explanations that are asked and given by the characters seem so convincing, you almost believe the main character John Oldman may really exist.
The first movie takes place in a cabin, during a going away party for the main character John Oldman. John reveals to his close friends and colleagues that he is 14,000 years old and most of the movie are his friends and confidents trying to wrestle with that fact. The cast is predominantly middle aged men, a few women, and older adults. Making the setting mature and thoughtful as the adults are all professors from various fields at his university.
A great example of the authentic feel of the film is this when one character asks John where he was during a specific date in the 1200s, John responds by asking if she remembers what exactly she was doing at any specific date decades prior. The obvious answer is she doesn’t remember and neither does he. No one would remember something like that offhand which is a very human response. The off and on reaction from the group as they accept or reject Johns story, I feel mimics how any other rational person may react if they were in the same situation. That is true art in my opinion. Crafting a wonderful sci story that captures people minds because it just seems so real, yet mystical at the same time.
The critique that I do have is largely that you can tell it is a low budget film. There are moments where the acting is forced. There is a scene when one of the characters pulls a gun on John, being rather upset that John would go to such lengths to claim immortality while so many in the world have died. It is soon revealed that the character who pulled the gun had lost is wife the day before. I didn’t care for the scene. Though it does portray the skepticism and possible anger that close friends might feel when their trusted, charismatic, and reliable friend suddenly sounds like a mad man and sticks to it. The ending is solid. Leaving room to expand, though wrapping things up enough to where it could’ve easily stood on its own.
At about an hour and a half long, I highly recommend The Man From Earth to anyone. 9.5/10.
The Man From Earth: Holocene.
(TLDR Version) Stands well as a sequel. Didn’t quite capture all the magic of the original. Targets a younger audience. Worth a watch if you saw the first one. 7.5/10.
Full Review. In my opinion if you enjoyed the concept and the main actor in the original, you will still find those things done well in the second. While the first stood out phenomenally as an original standalone movie. The second, acts well as a sequel though you wouldn’t watch it on its own and find the same enjoyment. The 2nd movie takes place 10 years later where John Oldman now calls himself John Young and teaches at a different university under a new identity. John also comes to the realization that for the first time in 14,000 years, he has begun to age. Rather then the movie focusing on a room of adults asking tough intellectual questions, the movie follows four college students who are students of John’s.
The students discover Johns secret after reading a book published by someone who was with John in the previous movie and wrote a book about John’s life and story from that night. The students start to connect the dots, and come to believe Johns fantastical story after doing some research and calling people from his past to corroborate the information.
The acting isn’t quite as good and feels a little more like a teen drama. According to my research, the hope was that the sequel would turn in to a TV spin-off, which is fairly obvious at the end. Though if they kept it to one, MAYBE 2 seasons I think it could do well with.
The last third of the sequel is where it gets a little forced, rushed, and weird. The characters start acting erratic, like the movie is trying to take you somewhere it’s not meant to. While I’m not as critical as some, I certainly see why this is an issue. I’m not saying they shouldn’t have made a sequal, though the last third of it makes me wish they hadn’t bothered.
The ending is a cliffhanger, where an ominous FBI agent shows up at the door of the character who was in the first movie and wrote the book about John’s life. Then that’s it.
While the first movie is a flavorful, well written story, the second feels like a lengthy teen drama TV show.
That being said if you enjoyed the first then please enjoy the second. Just recognize it for what it is. Frankly, the story will stick with me forever as I thoroughly enjoy the concept and may decide to write my own version for the heck of it. 7.5/10. Though the high rating is simply because the first is so worth the watch.

So this thought came to me as I was doing some fanfic writing for TES, of Atmorans who were dragged deep into the depths during Ysgramor’s passage to Skyrim who watched their Dragon and Priest be devoured by the Kraken and then claimed and changed but it, of the fact that Dragons and Krakens are two similar beings that I can easily see people worshipping were they to exist IRL as they do in fiction.
Which made me pause and think..: this could be a fun discussion topic for the subreddit!
So what would you rather worship? A Dragon, A Kraken, or Promethean Fire?
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Trying out a new break symbol there.
So my thoughts on each.
Dragons are Dragons. Aweful, Awe inspiring, terrible, great creatures of greed and wisdom and cruelty. Life perfected in it’s terrible majesty. Depending on the Dragon of course, but most dragons who are worshipped tend to be more like Smaug than a Paarthurnax.
I could very easily see myself revering an Dragon in all it’s majesty.
Kraken are basically the embodiment ment of the Ocean’s wrath, it’s deepest darkest enmities, and control of the seas and trades smiting all that anger it’s dominion and demands tribute.
Krakens tend to only be a real threat to coastal towns, ports, and sea trade but considering how many depend on all of those, and how much of the planet is their dominion… you’d see a lot of people sacrificing and revering theses great beasts just to placate them.
Fire
Fire is fire. It symbolizes souls, knowledge, destruction, creation, warmth, danger, light, shadows, and everything in between.
It’s one of those few entities of nature that kind of represents everything we value as humanity.
What is Sun worship but fire writ large on a universal scale?
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So I’m mostly likely to turn to some kind of fire faith then Dragon or Kraken, but I can see circumstances for both.
But that’s just me, what about the rest of y’all? Are there any other fantastical figures/creatures you could see yourself revering if not outright worshipping?

(Sorry for English, I'm not very good at speaking German)
Long story short, I want to get on HRT and while I know there are a few therapists who will give somebody the indication letter off of one or two sessions, these therapists tend to use only virtual meetings and I have avoidant personality disorder and really struggle with meeting people virtually. I've tried for a few years now to prepare myself to do a virtual meeting with somebody but I've come to a point where I would rather live the rest of my life without being able to look at myself without extreme distress than to even start the process of arranging a virtual therapy session. All that being said:

1. Does anyone know any therapists who will write the indication letter within a few in-person sessions (or even house visits)? I can get anywhere in Badem-Württemberg and (specifically northern) Bayern, as well as anywhere in Rhineland-Pfalz or Hessen that borders Badem-Württemberg.
2. Any recommended endocrinologists/anyone who can prescribe HRT in this area would also be helpful.
3. Additionally, is there potentially a way to get HRT without even getting the indication letter? I have private health insurance and I know that can help speed up/simplify the process a bit.
4. I've heard of people in other countries who get denied/delayed transitioning because of certain mental disorders they have. I want to get a few things diagnosed, and was just wondering if this applies to Germany as well or if there's a way to hide a diagnosis from a therapist or endocrinologist.
5. How much does HRT typically cost, specifically testosterone gel?

Hello in a bit of a unique situation. I have read some posts regarding this but didn't quite answer it for me.
My girlfriend and I are buying a home built in 2007, 3 bed 2 bath, 1500sqft, fenced, 2022 new ac system, 2023 solar panels, new appliances besides washedryer but they still work, granite counter tops, corner lot, sprinkler system etc etc.
It is being sold to use for 324k and 9k going to closing costs as credits. The seller is an old work friend of mine and friends with my significant others mother. The zestimate on Zillow is showing roughly 365k value. Waiting on the appraisal report to see exactly. She is replacing the roof in the next couple of weeks through their insurance claim that has been approved no issue.
My question is about Sunnova solar panels with a remaining balance of 20k. I have a FHA loan and doing a down payment assistance program of 10k and a 2.5k grant since I am the only one on the deed not my girlfriend. Anyways, I am fine with assuming the loan, this seller has gave us a huge discount on the home, 9k credit to the closing costs, leaving all the furniture besides master bedroom and is now replacing the roof. The Sunnova website says the loan is assumable no issue but my real estate attorney is bringing up the UCC thing they file stating it is in fact a lien (company website says it is not a lien), and that it will have to be paid off in full before closing. Does anyone have any experience with FHA and assuming solar panel loans?
If they have to pay off the solar panels in full then they would pay in full or we would have to come to an agreement on how much each party pays. Not sure if they would be a fan of that since I assume she is under the impression they are assumable no problem. I had her send all the info to the attorney to check out. They did mention if it wasn't assumable they would pay it off but that was before paying a deductible for a new roof.
Fyi: The solar panel payment is 90$ a month and her electric bill is anywhere between 20-50$. This is in southern Florida east coast if that matters. Also, I understand that they most likely got the tax benefit from the solar panels.