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Washington Journal: May 15, 2024

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Inside Elections' Jacob Rubashkin discusses Campaign 2024 and key Senate races to watch, Rep. Glenn Ivey (D-MD) discusses congressional news of the day, and International Association of Chiefs of Police's Will Johnson discusses National Police Week.

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I'm putting fake names... (A lot of the timelines are spread out but they talk about those specific moments, I hope they make since)
I have a friend, I'll call her J. I have known J for almost 9 years. She and I grew up pretty close and we were inseparable. Over the first few years of our friendship she had lost my parents trust from an incident involving a boy, she wasn't allowed to stay over for sleepovers and I practically lost my whole summer that year. I was pretty angry at my parents and blamed things on them. I regret my actions and I did learn but in my mind I thought J was the only person who understood me.
After the whole incident settled down. School started up again and she would jokingly push me into a boy or a locker. She started putting her arm around my neck, trying to choke me. She would continuously punch me or smack me on the head. I honestly got annoyed by it but I acted like it was nothing. She had suddenly became obsessed with TikTok and she posted a whole TikTok about her friends, their was a video of me that stood out. I wasn't wearing a shirt. Which completely made me uncomfortable because I wasn't wearing a shirt and she took the video while I was changing. She didn't take it down. She also would post photos without my consent. Like ones that made me feel ugly or disgusting. And I would tell her how they made me feel. But she would still post them. I started telling her no when she asked for photos and she always would sneak one when I wasn't looking. She doesn't take no for an answer. She will start whining when you don't listen. I used to trust her with my feelings and I would tell her about everything. And now I feel like she knows too much.
This past school year all of my friends (king, J, Joe, Bell) and I went to SDYC. And well when we went J was lying a bunch and starting a bunch of drama and it threw all of my friends off. We all didn't trust J and Joe that well during that time. I felt like the only people I had was my friends King and Bell. Because they both understood how I felt.
After that. King, J, and I had a sleepover. During the middle of the night I was watching a movie and J began to bug me. She started pushing on me saying I was taking up too much room. But honestly I was the one who was sleeping in between two couches there's no way I was taking that much space because I was falling in the crack. She then proceeded to call me a fat roll. I said "no your a fat roll" jokingly. And then she freaks out and she went to tell her boyfriend. It annoyed me because all her boyfriend knows how to do is talk bad. After that sleepover. She started working at the same place as me and I told her about my big crush on this coworker of ours. And so then she decided to start flirting with him in front of me. She would throw something at him jokingly and giggle. I didn't try to think anything of it. But then when we were talking about him the next thing she decided to say was, "your just jealous because he talks to me and not you". The thing is I don't want to talk to him that's why I don't try to talk to him. He has talked to me before, but I rather admire him from afar. He's like 13 years older than me. He was just hot to me at the time.
I'll just say I am lighter than a 5'6 girl. I might have a little bit of belly fat but that's just my body. And I do have an eating disorder. I don't eat enough, I practically starve myself. J honestly made me feel worse and I started having moments where I would basically pass out from no iron in my body. J continued to body shame me even from the amount of food I would eat. She straight up made is feel like she was calling me ugly and fat. It hurt and it made me angry. I told my dad and he said she's just jealous and not to worry about it. I brushed it off but she basically would say something everyday. It got to a point where I was crying all the time.
During my last year of highschool J didn't have a vehicle. So she would ask me to drive her places. I didn't mind because we would be going to the same places. And I started offering to pay for her drink or something. I didn't think much of it in tell I was always taking her places and buying her drinks but she still wanted me to pay her back for stuff when I didn't have much money. She managed to buy a vehicle for a small price by saving up the money she didn't spend. I feel stupid for offering. One day her mom even texted me asking for the small money I "owed" J. But my parents think I don't owe her anything because I have given her most of my money and that she owes me money.
J also does this thing where if you don't give her your attention she'll keep tapping you. Over and over again. Everytime she asks for my attention it's always for something so pointless and stupid. Nothing serious. And everytime I ask for her attention she'll ignore me. She does it a lot. She only wants to have the attention. I stopped telling her about how I feel because all I know is she'll either use it against me or not actually listen and move past it. Like once she asked me how I felt and when I told her that I cried about something she moved on from it into her talking about her crying over some movie she watched.
The way she treated me made me so angry that I texted her boyfriend anonymously asking him to control his girlfriend and get her to be nicer to others. He didn't like the message and told his girl on the spot and J tried to call my fake number. I didn't answer and then she ran to me to tell me the tea. She later assumed it was a boy she was flirting with that she pushed away.
I hate her boyfriend but he deserves better.. because she has talked to another boy behind his back. When I started liking this one boy. I told her about it and then she began to tell me how she met this UK boy and she thinks he's all that. She later found out he was lying about his age and she got back to reality before she lost her in person boyfriend.
She told king I was flirting with this one dude but I wasn't. J told me to add this guy she found on Facebook on snap, I said okay and I called the dude a nickname like a Grandma would call their grandchildren. And I thought it was funny and the guy thought it was chill. I didn't think anything of it and then I blocked him because I didn't want to talk to him. She then decided to add the guy on snap. And she starts talking to him. The amount of times she has lied is crazy. I blocked him but she still has him on snap. For what reason I don't know.
J and Joe and I have recently had a lot of problems with each other. It's always J and Joe fighting and I'm between listening to them both argue about each other. I was getting tired of it. J hit my breaking point when she decided to ask me for my boyfriends sisters snap. You don't just ask your friend for her boyfriends sisters snap. That's weird. She also asked for my boyfriends and she looked him up when I told her no and she added a bunch of dudes with the same name. She didn't find him but there is no way I want her knowing him or his sister. I have too many trust issues with her. She's the main reason why a lot of my relationships didn't work out. They didn't like her and she manipulated me into saying things that upset them. She makes me so uncomfortable. She made me seem lesbian once when I know I'm not. But she made a TikTok about it and a lot of people from my school saw it. I don't like false accusations. I'm pretty sure she used it for clout. But also my parents think she's inlove with me because she can never leave me alone and she always HAS to hold hands or hug.
J doesn't understand a lot of things. And she calls me stupid. I honestly want karma to come get her but that's bad and I don't mean to say that. It hurts a lot.
I had blocked J on everything. But since I worked with J I saw her and she started bawling her eyes out at me saying she did nothing, I felt bad but I was annoyed because she kept bugging me. So I unblocked her. I decided to block her again after because my boyfriend said she was manipulating me. And well the more I had her blocked the nicer she was. After a while Joe did something to make me give up on my friendship with her too and J expected that to be a chance to get me back. And well she did practically. She was a lot nicer and I felt like she changed. But Man was I wrong.. Just today I was working my second night shift. I said something as a joke because I was hoping J would get what I meant. Her boyfriend was on the call... He took everything out of context and said something that made me feel less about myself. I already feel like crap being the person I am. I want to better myself but the more people say things the more I give up. I want to be encouraged not dragged down. I don't know why he has to be so mean. I never did anything to him. I don't know why they both have to be... I listen to her call people ugly all the time. Like just stop. I want her to stop. I'm leaving for the military soon, and she said that I can't get rid of her. That sounds psycho. And it honestly makes me want to get away more. I'm tired of the toxic environment and I want to get away. But she's everywhere. She knows everything about me. She has photos of me I hate. She has so many things she can use against me. I'm honestly scared. I want to block her again but I know she's just going to keep bugging me about it. And she might turn people against me. She's good at talking to people. I'm not I'm an introvert. I don't want her ever find me again once I leave. But I know she might try. People always find a way. And she's creepy. Because I know she'll be able to. But I just want to move on with my life. I don't know how to remove her from my life. What should I do?

Me (17M) and my mother (51F) were supposed to go to the USA this year (we live in Europe, the Netherlands to be exact). She suddenly didn’t want to go anymore because she found out the weather is too hot down there. I came with a different opportunity for a different place in the USA and she barely looked at it and also didn’t want to go anymore. So then we were looking for trips a little closer to home, but still like a 4-hour flight, we wanted to go to Cyprus or Bulgaria. So my mom checked it out and still didn’t book and when I ask her when she will book the vacations, she gets mad at me. I have had it and got mad at her for her empty promises. All my other family members + friends have already booked their vacations/trips for the summer.
I am turning 18 next year so I don’t want to come off as “entitled”, next year I am fully planning on going on my own trips/vacations and my parents don’t have to pay anything anymore.
Also, I don’t know if it’s her mental state, but she is drinking quite a lot of alcohol, leaves potato chips or other snacks on her bed (she eats them before she goes to sleep). She has been trying to quit drinking alcohol during the week for a year (maybe even longer) (her goal was to drink only during the weekend) and she promised me she would give me €50 every time she drinks during the week, and she does that. Scary part, I already made like €2000 in just one year with this… she also consistently makes excuses for this and also wants to quit smoking but also hasn’t quit. We are from a rich family, so money isn’t an issue, I think it’s more of her mental health? She doesn’t want to admit it, though.

It was late November 2015. I was 51 and one year past my divorce (which was not related to cheating) when I became so disgusted with myself that I knew I had to pick myself up. I was alone for the long holiday, and although I wasn't really sad or lonely, I felt empty. However, I had some extra time to consider how does one picks oneself up.
I made a list of potential New Year resolutions that were individually realistic. Some were really easy and stupid like “have your chipped front tooth fixed” and “take & post a selfie”. These smaller tasks fueled my confidence and provided the energy boosts needed to tackle the more challenging resolutions, like starting a weight loss challenge at work.
Skip ahead to March 4th 2016. I had a Friday lunch date with a married client that I met two weeks prior. Of course, it was not a real date, as I wouldn't impose myself on a married woman, nor would I risk my career or my ego, especially if the signals she seemed to be sending were just a product of my wishful thinking, stimulated by checking off some boxes on the list on the fridge dated 1/1/16.
The following is my thank you note to her for a great date as well as for helping me check a lot of boxes over the past few weeks. I sent her a link to it as it is in the form of my first ever online post (one more check box, YAY!).
************************************** We were only 1 minute in the hotel room; her jeans in a ball on the floor. She sat at the foot of the king sized bed and backed her way into the stack of oversized pillows lining the headboard. I followed as If attached by a leash. I landed somewhat awkwardly on my elbows between her legs finding myself squarely face to face with the tattoo. This tattoo, that she so shamelessly revealed just a week ago, the same tattoo that has been scorching my thoughts and the same tattoo that she promised me complete and unlimited access.
It’s been a long time since I have been here or anywhere near as nice as here, between the legs of a beautiful woman 20 years younger and far out of my league....even when I was her age. I took a second to drink in my fortunate situation. I admired her panties. All day I was so hoping she would wear those same panties as before. She didn’t. These were different but similar enough. The delicate lace and silk perfectly framed the tattoo on her hip. She did not disappoint. There is a fruity jasmine scent, intoxicatingly pleasant, and oh so subtle. It is not here. I’ll need to find its source. I want more of that. (I remember being thoroughly impressed and thinking to myself “This girl is good”.)
I briefly forgot that there was someone else here besides myself and the tattoo. How long have I been down here perving out on her? I wondered. I hesitated, and then apologetically looked up half expecting a well-deserved snarky glare. What I found instead was an ear to ear compassionate smile followed by a tilt of her head and an arch of her eyebrow that said “I like that you like that, carry on”.
With confidence restored that we were still in sync, I adjusted myself so that I was in a good position to thoroughly enjoy what I came to do. I kissed the tattoo hard and gave it a good lick. The challenge for today was “Taste the Tattoo” and I won. I did a small celebration gesture that she rolled her eyes to. I continued to kiss and taste all around until every freckle got some personal attention. As I got to the upper most reaches of her inner thighs, I looked up to check in as I was about to cross a new line. For the first time she was not looking back at me but had laid her head back deep into the pillows, her eyes closed. I took that as a yes!
I marveled at the softness of her inner thighs on my cheeks as I gently placed kisses up one and down the other. As I kissed her through her panties, her hips responded by arching her up in anticipation of each next kiss. Before long, those wonderful panties were just getting in the way. I stopped and pondered whether to just slide them aside or remove them or to risk interrupting the mood and attempt a complete wardrobe removal as we were both still fully dressed except for her jeans.
I didn’t have to ponder long as she knew what she wanted and it was not any of the options I was considering. Still lying back with her head semi submerged within the pillows, she held out her arms as if gesturing for a hug. I moved up her body and when I got close enough she pulled me in for a kiss.
Unbelievably, this was our first kiss. I found it odd that we had not kissed yet and was grateful she thought to stop for a moment to have a kiss. We kissed some and then I settled in to thoroughly enjoy it. However, the kiss to come was not the kiss I was expecting or a kiss I was ready for. It was a kiss that could ruin everything.
Technically, there was one kiss before. It was an awkward kiss 5-10 minutes earlier just after we entered the room. All in about the time it took for the hotel door to close behind us, she tossed her bag on the sofa, had her jewelry off and set on the nightstand while I emptied my pockets and silenced my phone.
We approached each other, and as we met I was looking at the place where the tattoo would be under her shirt and behind her jeans. They were higher cut and could not be pulled down that far to get to the tattoo. They would have to come off. To just reach in and do that would be an uncharacteristically bold move for me. But I did have unquestionable permission to have the tattoo in any way that I desired. I reached down with both hands and took hold of the waistband on each side of the button. I didn’t see her simultaneous move in at me at first. Just as I felt the metal of the button, I felt her reaching her arms around my neck and realized that she was tip toeing up for a kiss. It caught me unexpectedly and I think it showed on my face that it did. I tried to recover and moved back in to accept her lips on to mine but it turned into an awkward peck.
I scolded myself for the selfish moment and just as I was trying to formulate a recovery gesture, she, without missing a beat, gently dismissed my fumble and gracefully restored the momentum. “Oh” she said with surprise in her tone, while looking down at my fingers ready to release her button. Then, in a more playfully quizzical tone, she followed with “I guess you want to get right to THAT then” and she stepped back away from me where I lost grip of her jeans. She replaced my fingers on the button with hers, paused, maybe waiting for me to look up to her eyes, which I finally did, then flashed me a devilishly naughty smile and pulled her jeans down to the top of her boots. She then proudly announced, mostly to herself, “You really are going to let me have fun with you, aren’t you!” seemingly shedding any doubts in her mind that I would go through with this. She then sat at the foot of the all white linen king sized bed, removed her boots and jeans and backed her way into the stack of oversized pillows lining the headboard.
Back to our kiss. The kiss that from now on I will reflect on as our first kiss
Responding to her hug gesture, I moved up her body and when I got close enough she pulled me in for a kiss. I didn’t flub it this time, but again, I didn’t know it was coming, and prolly I should have. It took only ten seconds to adjust and synchronize to each other’s kissing form. It was warm and succulent and sweet and was wonderful. I really was surprised at how nice this felt. I don’t recall married kissing being this enjoyable. I remember saying to myself “Damn, this girl can kiss”.
I was on top, in a position that wasn’t going to be comfortable for as long as I wanted this to last, so I backed away to reposition but she held tight indicating she didn’t want me to move. I gestured at the space next to her and she relented. We then settled in facing one another side by side; her smile confirming that this was a nice place. We were hugging and kissing, pulling each other closer and looking into each other’s eyes. Our legs intertwined and our hands were roaming, but not really in a sexual way, more like trying to make as much body contact as possible. I couldn’t get over how I felt so much more familiarity than there was. What I did not recognize at the time was that this was the physical intimacy catching up to match the virtual intimacy we have been sharing online.
Soon the intensity escalated and it was getting very hot very quickly. The intensity and passion that was building was not something I ever expected or planned for. This was the rare kind of making out where accidental hickeys happen and inadvertent “Oh god I love you’s” slip out. Not that either of those was going to happen but my safe, non-committal no emotional strings encounter was getting too hot to not risk introducing emotions into the situation. And that could happen.
At some point I was no longer kissing her lips and mouth but was kissing her.
I broke contact to catch a breath and maybe get some control of the fire. We stopped for a moment to breathe and cool off. She slid herself on top and I rolled over on to my back to accommodate her. She looked at me with eyes that appeared to agree that it was a good time to slow it down. She closed her eyes and she seemed to enjoy that I was rubbing her back with both hands that I slipped up under her shirt. She presented her lips for me to kiss and then her cheek for the same, then neck and ear and lips again. Her long hair had fallen down around us, surrounding our faces like a vail creating a tiny private and even more intimate space. Inside here it was darker and the temperature and humidity rose quickly. We were breathing each other’s breath between kisses. All of a sudden I noticed that Jasmine was back. Not subtle this time, but deep and fulfilling. I loved it.
This fragrance stuff really works. The next morning just after waking up, I caught an unexpected subtle whiff on my skin under my watch and my heart jumped by 20 beats. Who’d a thunk it possible?
The passion was building again but since I was aware and cautious now, I wanted to enjoy and go with it. I thought I could keep it measured and I did for a while as it does take two. The kissing slowed to half and so did the passion. However, the rest of our bodies started to make up for it and the touching evolved into the sexual. She was still on top of me and my hands were exploring and squeezing on her panty covered butt, then under and in those panties. Her body contact became more targeted as she was now very deliberately mashing her fun stuff all over my fun stuff. The kissing subsided but replaced with the audible accompaniment of her squeaks, moans and quicker breathing timed with her mashing I was no longer in control. The passion was under control but being replaced with something intimately erotic.
I abruptly escaped by gently rolling her over on to her back then getting up and knelling between her legs. I took a moment to catch my breath and wanted to say “That is getting WAY too intimate. Can we get naked and have sex now?” However, I tugged at her panties and said something dorky like “can we take these off now?” Yes, we were still both fully dressed except for her jeans
Since I am the kind of guy who doesn’t kiss and tell, (well, only tells about the kisses) and this is not the forum for it, I am not going to talk about the sexy part over the next 30 minutes. I will tell you that we did finally each get ourselves unceremoniously naked and then the sexy part finishes where it started, with me finishing all over that beautiful tattoo. Of course I did a small celebration gesture that she rolled her eyes to.
*************************************************
Cuddle time. Our snapchats leading up to this encounter were heavy on the anticipation and buildup but didn’t contain a lot of detail about or define what stuff would happen during our “fun” time together.
Me: “Ok then, tomorrow lunchtime, I’m in.”
Her: “OMG Are you saying that you are REALLY going to come here and let me have fun with you?
Me: “I’m REALLY going to come there. I am REALLY going to fully inspect that tattoo, as well as the neighborhood where the tattoo lives.
Her: “I so can’t wait to get my hands on you.”
Me: “WOW….Now that this is real and going to happen, my heart is beating so hard that I am afraid that people can see it through my shirt.”
Her: “You have to tell me, are you being SERIOUS right now? You can’t say this and not show up. It’s OK if you are teasing, but you have to say so that you are now….not tomorrow!!!”
Me: “I am SERIOUS and I PROMISE I will be there. You have gotten to me, BAD. All week with the way we have been talking..err..I mean snapchatting; I can’t get you out of my head. Then today with those tattoo snaps you sent; I can’t get up from my desk. LOL…..NOT kidding NOT teasing.”
Her: “I am BAD, and I like having FUN. I am going to have so much fun with you!!!”
************************************************
The only specific things I recall us acknowledging we would do with our “fun” was tattoo inspection and cuddle time. So as soon as cleanup from sexy time was done we both knew what time it was. For me, as good as the inspection was the cuddle was better. Just as during the sexy time we changed things up and we got to cuddle many ways. We started face to face full contact hugging just like our kissing time with some but less kissing and more being in the moment.
We were still hot (temperature hot now) and sweaty so that didn’t last long. She turned over and we spooned some. I was still craving full body contact but it was still so hot that we had to separate a bit. No contact spooning if you will, with just my one hand caressing her exposed shoulder and arm and hip with an occasional butt cheek squeeze.
It was about that time that we had our first ever personal conversation. On the project there were lots of flirty banter and some personal stories but almost always as part of a group. We had many phone calls and a few project meetings with just us two but never did the conversation get personal. Until now the only personal talks (Chats) we have had have been via Snapchat. I don’t recall who asked the first question of the other, but it was like a dam broke and we started filling in the details of our lives, our feelings and all the things we chatted about.
There was a lot to tell and we were giddy like children (child) best friends re-meeting on the first day of school catching each other up on our summer vacations. At one point she had something compelling to say and faster than a fish out of water she flipped back to facing me so she could gesture with her hand and punctuate through her expression. She landed close. Closer that I think she meant to at first and just a bit awkward I felt. But I was wrong. She didn’t back up an inch. I really couldn’t see her hand but I could feel that she was using it in the 2 to 4 inches of space between our chests. Her face was right into mine. She would lean back or up just an inch when she wanted me to see her eyes or smile or frown for emphasis, then settle back into the pillows with our foreheads or noses or cheeks touching. It was the farthest thing in the world from awkward.
If there was a recurring theme for the day it would be HOT; in every sense and synonym of the word. Again, it was getting too sweaty to remain that close. This time she broke contact to catch a breath and escape the heat. We stopped talking for a moment to breathe and cool off. She sat up, crawled to, and grabbed the (sexy time) clean-up towel that was at the far foot of the bed. She turned around so that she was kneeling facing me as she brought the towel up to her chest to absorb the beads and drips of sweat that had accumulated. As I watched, I again thought of my great fortune to be right here right now feeing what I feel and seeing the beauty before me. She pushed the towel down across her belly button and it fell into her lap.
I observed the soft sunlight reflecting off the white sheets, the white towel, and the white pillows bathed her in perfect light creating just a hint of subtle shadows in all of the right places on her angelic white skin. I started consciously taking photos with my mind. I wanted to capture every nuance and note every detail. I don’t know if I will ever be here again.
I don't recall if my next realization was comprehended in a split second, or if it took ten seconds to develop, but a terrible fear washed over me that for the first time in forever, she was beyond my touch and her next action might be to look for her panties or go jump in the shower. We were after all, deep into the second hour of her hour long lunch.
As I was preparing myself for the pain soon to come, I couldn't understand where it was coming from. I had the BEST DAY EVER, but I felt like an exhausted child who just watched the Disney fireworks finally and knows what that means.
What the hell? What is happening in my head? I don't even know this girl, let alone have feelings for her beyond she made my dick feel good at lunchtime.....and, I guess my ego is healthier since I met her. I have not cheated on my diet since she turned on the flattery the week before. I was sure it had to be somehow manipulative, but I hoped that if only a 5% chance it wasn't AND she liked me AND her mom was single, made it easy to keep my snacking to peas & carrots.
My self esteem has been skyrocketing too, as I have been checking a lot of boxes on my refrigerator. LOL, so many in fact, that I have been adding things to the list after they happened that I didn't dare put on it as they seemed pretty unobtainable just two months before. "Get sent a nude selfie, check. Have the confidence to send one back, check. Take a hottie 32 year old client out to lunch and fuck her brains out, check.
Did I just discover that I like girls who make my self esteem feel good more than I like girls who make my dick feel good?
Shit, that wasn't even on my top ten list. Smart, funny, pretty, Kind, whatever is the opposite of bitchy, fun in bed, boobs and/or an age appropriate figure is always nice, curious, someone you can trust to see you at your worst. Before today, "genuinely being a boost & support of my self esteem" was 10th.
Then BAM. I was hit in the face with the towel. Damn girl, I hope you can handle a spanking because I was just on the verge of making an interpersonal discovery of some importance over here, I thought to myself. I noticed the slightest or possibly mock look of concern on her face as she asks "you're not having any regrets or second thoughts over there are you?". I reflexively replied "Oh god no". Then with some emphasys, I continued "today was incredible. I REALLY needed this and you were PERFECT, thank you".
Again she did not disappoint. She crawled to the top of the bed on the far side and then to me over the pillows and laid down at a 90 angle to me on her stomach parallel to the headboard with her head nearly right on top of mine. She propped herself up a bit on her elbows and we kissed deeply. It was nice.
I made a few attempts to shake my internal drama, get out of my head and get back to my goal of picking my self up after my divorce. Oops, I mean back to pleasing a beautiful woman who clearly was not yet done having her fun with me. The emotional rollercoaster ride over the last hours, days & weeks completely blew out my brains ability to generate or absorb endorphins or whatever happens in a situation like this. Shortly after we had joked around while showering together, kissing goodbye (just like when I kissed my endorphin killing ex wife) and going on back to our separate lives.
I drove the hour or so home, brought my dog to the park and had healthiest and happiest cry I ever had. I don't know what I was feeling or why, but I was feeling again and it brought me much relief and contentedness.
We texted a bit that evening confirming that we each enjoyed our time together and agreeing that we should do that again sometime. The next day, Saturday, her husband took their 5 & 8 year old sons somewhere for the day. We checked in with each other again over text and chatted some about our lunch but the spark or excitement we usually had was not the same.
I reached out again that evening and asked if she was in a place that we could talk on the phone. She resisted but did call me (our first personal phone call). It took her 24 hours to let her cry bubble up. It turns out that our emotional experiences were remarkably similar, albeit from different perspectives.
She much later reveals that she felt emotionally dead for her hubby. She evolved to a bad place where she wanted fuck anyone but her hubby but still fucked him twice a week and had to appear happy to do it, killing her brain chemistry.
We rode the best and worst roller coaster in the world for 6 or 8 months....until the the Cocaine eventually wore off or the unobtainable became obtainable and it wasn't the the same rush for either of us any longer. She was the closest thing to a drug addiction that I ever felt. I never wanted anyone or anything like I wanted her.
My hope is that this story helps one person answer the question "Why the hell would he/she risk giving up their wonderful & loving family for an hour with a douchebag or a skank?"

So for background I 28f am currently unemployed and live with my parents in india. Here it's common to stay with parents btw. I was living on my own but they asked me to stay with them. I accepted bez it will save me money. But just for info I pay for myself and help around the house as much as I can. Still sometimes my parents can be too much with their nagging and last month my sister 30f asked me to stay with her for few weeks as she lives alone in Delhi and she drop me off at railway station in car while I was coming back home to Mumbai. While I was staying with her I cooked for her and cleaned almost every day. Also she didn't pay for everything except food while I was there.
Now my sister has habbit of counting past favours every time she needs helps and if I get her help 1 time she make he do things for her 4 times for it atleast.
So currently my sister is purchasing house that is 2 hr train ride away from home and 2 hr to come back. She asked me to chcek out the place so I went and did that and then she came back from Delhi and purchased house a month later that. Also I helped her with some money to put the down payment as I have little savings. She was staying at her new place for 2 days to finish some paperwork Now today she is going back and wants me to go there and pick up the documents from her and get them back home bez she thinks it will be safe at home. She also reminded me how she dropped me off while coming back from her home so I should do this for her. She used same excuse to make me serve her dinner when she came here. The things is it's scorching hot outside and I am already going through depression that nobody knows about. So I told her I don't wanna go. She got angry and immediately called mom and dad. They both started yelling at me. Calling me jobless and lazy. I do half of house chores btw. I couldn't take their insulting anymore so I called her 6 times she didn't pick up and then I called her bf the she showed me attitude for refusing and then I agreed to come bez I had no option like always. she can just take her documents back with her. Her home is not unsafe or anything but no she is bent on me doing 4 hr train ride to pick it up from her. This is not the only time she has made me do things this way. I feel like NO is never the option for me. I also feel like I never should have taken her help last monthe just to relax at her home. Bez I am paying back a lot. It also doesn't feel it's worth it. But again maybe I should do this since I am at home and have nothing important to do anyway? AITA?

I was diagnosed stage 3 NSC Lung cancer almost four years ago (36 yo male). Family situation was/is My dad lives here in Ohio and so does my brother (34) . My sister (38) lives in Chicago. My mom lives in Florida it comes up here for the summers. I was always close with my family and coworkers before I was diagnosed. I had that overwhelming wave of support you get when everyone you know finds out your cancer. It was all phone calls, texts, and emails for the most part. My diagnosis wasn’t the best as the cancer had spread to my adrenal gland and lymph nodes. My dad really stepped up and he was my rock. I’m lucky I had him during that time. He drove me to chemo the first couple of treatments and sat in on the dr appointments as a second ear. I was going to be doing 5 rounds of chemo every three weeks and immunotherapy for 12. The chemo killed the tumor so they cut out the upper lobe of my right lung. Immunotherapy wasn’t great but I got through it.
I was incredibly happy that I survived it all and got back to work. However some things really bothered me such as my mom never came back home during my chemo. She came home for my lobectomy in November 2020 and visited me in the hospital and held my hand like I was her baby boy again when they removed all the breathing , catheters, and drainage tubes. When I got home I noticed phone calls and texts weren’t coming in. It also bothered me that my sister never came to see me and she’s about four hours away but not four days. My brother was in town and only came once during the year of treatment.
Another thing that bothered me is none of my coworkers would call or text during my time off. I really worried when I got a letter from my employer of ten years that I was terminated. It was a really tough time and I was on so much medication and my whole routine was sitting on the couch and watching YouTube. I slowly descended into a very dark place and became scared of going in public places because I thought people were staring at me because I looked so sickly and dying. My bank account was getting down to nothing and I asked for my old position back and luckily they hired me again. It was excruciatingly difficult physically and emotionally to sell cars that hot summer of 2021. I had heat stroke three months of being back and thought I was done. I was really sick and weak. I was miserable with so many things. When I did see my family I’m sure that attitude wore off and I soon was getting comments that I was too negative.
My kids mom hates me and was in cancer research and sent me this factoid sheet from the American Cancer Association that said my five year survival odds were 3%. She said I was wasting my time I had left. She fueled my fire to live just to prove her wrong but at this point my kid wanted me to die because he thought he’d get lots of life insurance money. Then I had to take custody unexpectedly of that same kid who wanted nothing to do with me. I was barely selling enough cars to keep my job and now had to take care of and raise a 13 year old with angst. That’s when my family truly disappeared and I think it’s because they’re worried my cancer would cone back then they’d have to care for my kid.
Fast forward to now and my son is reunited with his mom. His and my relationship has never been better after getting to spend 16 months living together. My health is I’m still alive obviously but my lungs are getting much weaker and my volume is shrinking and i also originally diagnosed late stage copd and have to take steroids to help me breathe. So my health is back on the downslope and my family is completely gone. My dad never calls or talks to me, and neither do my brother or sister. I see my mom once every couple of months when she’s home from Florida . We’ll go to Cracker Barrel and she’ll give me this half disgusted look and I get about 45 minutes of her time
I’m just sad that they’re gone but realized they’re kind of not the best family so I might be better. I truly believe they were looking at my custody and health situation as a hot potato so they all ran for the hills. Now with my breathing is getting more and more along with seizures it’s difficult and it’s real I’m going to die young and possibly soon. it’s really effecting my memory and stamina. I get confused and need naps. Its sometimes an insurmountable task for me to go greet a customer on the lot and begin the five hour process of selling a car and getting dirty looks from customers because I look like shit because well Ive been through some stuff. My sales are failing and they want me gone. I need health insurance and what little money I do make to support my son. Im worried all this financial, parental, and physical stress is going to bring back my cancer just because im stressed and just feel hopeless. I think of how I’ll die from COPD and how horrifying it seems to die that way. With my family gone and my coworkers wanting me gone I know it will be alone or at a state hospital with some hospice nurse I have no clue is. I don’t look for your pity but I’d like any advice you might have to how I can find solace in this lonely isolated place I’m trapped in. I’m angry at my family but I love them.I feel like I was supposed to die and even though I didn’t die then physically I died to them mentally. Maybe it’s too tough to watch someone you love struggle and know you’ll have to do it again
The only thing besides spending time with my son that really makes me happy is painting. During all of this I somehow found out I love to paint and since a June 2022 I’ve painted a couple of hundred paintings. Painting gives me hope.

Pregnancy is a special time filled with joy and excitement, but it also comes with a responsibility to nourish yourself and your growing baby. Eating a variety of fruits is a great way to get essential vitamins, minerals, and fiber. But with so many options in India, which ones are best for pregnant women? Let's dive into the world of Indian fruits and explore their benefits for moms-to-be.

Mangoes: The King of Fruits

Mangoes, the beloved king of fruits, are not only delicious but also packed with nutrients. They are an excellent source of vitamin C, which is essential for a healthy immune system and helps your body absorb iron. Mangoes also contain vitamin A, important for your baby's development, including their vision and bones. Just remember to enjoy them in moderation as they are also high in natural sugars.

Pomegranates: Jewels of Nutrition

Pomegranates are like little jewels, bursting with vitamins and antioxidants. They are a good source of folate, a B vitamin that is crucial for your baby's brain and spinal cord development. Pomegranates also contain iron, potassium, and vitamin K, all important for a healthy pregnancy. Plus, their juicy seeds can help relieve constipation, a common problem during pregnancy.

Bananas: Gentle on the Tummy

Bananas are a gentle and easily digestible fruit, perfect for soothing morning sickness and nausea. They are a good source of potassium, which helps regulate blood pressure and prevent muscle cramps. Bananas also contain vitamin B6, which is important for your baby's brain development and nervous system.

Guavas: Vitamin C Powerhouse

Guavas are a true vitamin C powerhouse, providing more of this essential nutrient than oranges! Vitamin C is important for boosting your immune system and helping your body absorb iron. Guavas are also a good source of fiber, which aids digestion and can help prevent constipation.

Oranges: Citrusy Goodness

Oranges are another great source of vitamin C and also contain folate, potassium, and vitamin B6. They are a refreshing and hydrating fruit, perfect for quenching your thirst on a hot day. Plus, their sweet and tangy flavor can help combat pregnancy cravings.

Apples: An Apple a Day...

The old saying "an apple a day keeps the doctor away" holds true for pregnant women too! Apples are a good source of fiber, vitamin C, and potassium. They also contain a type of fiber called pectin, which can help regulate blood sugar levels and may even lower cholesterol.

Grapes: Bursting with Flavor

Grapes are a delicious and refreshing fruit that are rich in antioxidants and vitamins. They are a good source of vitamin K, which is important for blood clotting and bone health. Grapes also contain resveratrol, a compound that has been linked to various health benefits, including improved heart health.
Important Considerations:

Wash all fruits thoroughly before eating to remove any dirt or pesticides.
Eat a variety of fruits to get a wide range of nutrients.
Listen to your body and enjoy fruits in moderation, as some may cause digestive discomfort.

Remember, a healthy diet is crucial during pregnancy. By incorporating these nutritious Indian fruits into your daily routine, you can ensure that you and your baby are getting the essential vitamins and minerals needed for a healthy pregnancy.

(From my friend’s mom who doesn’t have Reddit) My daughter (18F) has had excessive thirst for 3 years now. It wasn’t bad at the beginning but now it’s gotten so bad to the point where she has to get up a minimum of 3-4 times a night either to pee or to drink more water. It is not just dry mouth and we have already seen multiple specialists but no one can figure it out.
It’s not diabetes and her electrolytes don’t show an imbalance. She’s also had her thyroid and PTH tested and they’re in the normal range. However, whenever we get a new test done it shows she’s somehow dehydrated. I don’t understand how because she drinks an abnormal amount of water everyday.
A few weeks ago she all of a sudden became super nearsighted in one of her eyes to the point where it’s 20/80 and it’s slowly getting worse. This may or may not be related but it’s odd to come on so suddenly. One day she could see fine and now it’s getting worse.
Lastly, she also says that she has to drink close to 200-250 oz of water every day because if she doesn’t she gets hot flashes and is on the verge of passing out.
What other tests should we get done? Could it be an autoimmune disease?
Any responses would be greatly appreciated!!

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/This_Musician7165 posting in TwoHotTakes
User account has since been deleted
Concluded as per OOP
2 updates - Medium
Original - 15th January 2024
Update in a comment - 16th January 2024
Final Update (Link no longer accessible)- 16th January 2024

My Step Dad purposefully ruined my $900 prom dress by washing it! Is there anything I can do such as take legal?

Edit: Sorry for some reason Reddit took my original post down. This is my first time using Reddit
’ve never posted on here, but I really need advice because I’m so distraught and have no clue what I should do I’m only 17 and don’t know if there’s any legal action I can take. So for a little background I live with my bio mom and her husband since my dad and mom separated and were never married. I originally lived with my dad since I was 2 he won custody during the custody battle. However he later lost custody of me after having a bad work accident that made him paralysed and he wouldn’t be able to take care of me but I still see him every weekend and the whole summer. I moved in with my mom and her husband and their two sons ,1 stepbrother and 1 half brother, when I was 10. And ever since then my stepdad basically directly and indirectly says that I’ve disrupted their lives by coming back into my mother’s life, because I’m an extra person they have to take care of.
I’ve been working since I was in 10th grade and saving up for my senior yeacollege since last year with the money from my job since my mom and her husband let me know that only my mom would only help me with the basics such as my graduation cap and gown, senior dues, and senior class photo. Anything else I would have to pay for myself such as prom.
I get paid about $400 every two weeks from my job which Ive been saving in full, and then making extra money doing nails about $100 a week plus tip which I use as my spending money. Since it’s my senior and last year of high school I’ve been wanting to go all out for prom so I set a $800 budget for my prom dress. My prom is in April and I wanted to get my prom dress early since most of the actual cute ones sell out quick. So I went prom dress shopping in December and found a beautiful dress that’s costed $890. It’s dark green with a long train with rhinestone imbedded into it with glitter in the dress.
When I first showed my mom and stepdad the dress they asked how much it was, which I told them the amount and my mom said that she wouldn’t be paying for a dress that expensive which I replied it’s okay because I have more than enough money saved up to buy it, and I’ll still have a lot of money left over (23k to be exact but only my mom knows that) mom said I could get the dress and that it was very pretty, however my stepdad said that it’s irresponsible and a waste of money and I should use it for better things like helping out the family and paying some of the bills. And get a dress cheaper that’s max $300. Mind you both his son’s own PS5 and multiple $200+ shoes.
Long story short my mom disagreed with him and I ended up getting the dress in the end and she even put $150 toward it.
However ever since then he constantly brings up that I help pay for things around the house since I have so much money to throw away but my mom always shuts it down saying that I work hard for my money to save it and I already help about with paying the Netflix, Amazon prime, and Hulu bills while my step brother (18) don’t pay anything.
Anyway last Saturday we got into a really big disagreement because my stepdad suggested I should help my step brother pay for his prom to which I responded with no. He later called me selfish and said that it’s not fair that I get an expensive outfit while he doesn’t. And I guess I said with in a snarky way I responded with that’s not my child or my problem. He later tried to complain to my mom and she said that I was right and that if anything he should pay for his own prom.
Well today when I woke up from a nap I noticed my prom dress was missing from my closet since it’s in the very front of my closet and looked around for it. I then asked my stepdad if he has seen it since my mother was at work. And he said he had, and in fact he was washing it, while giving me a condescending smile. I immediately ran downstairs and saw my dress being washed on the heavy duty cycle I immediately cancel it and it was ruined. Majority of my rhinestones came out and the glitter was washed out the whole dress had been mangled.
I took one look at it and then threw it a trash bag and left for my friends house with the dress. I texted my mom and sent her pictures but I’m currently at my friends house and laying on her bed. My friends parent hanged it outside to allow it to air dry so my stepdad can’t put the blame on them if the dried it in the dryer. What makes me know he did to spite me because he never washes clothes, cooks or anything since “he’s the man of the house so he shouldn’t have to”, so there was no viable reason he could have for washing it, even if it needed washing.
Is there anything I can do? I know neither of them can replace being they are tough financial situation? I’ll update you guys when mom gets home. So far my stepdad has called 2x but I haven’t answered him. And my mom’s at work and can’t receive calls.

Comments

Fancy_Association484
My heart hurts for you. Get him to admit it over text then file small claims court.

OOP: He’s not gonna admit I don’t think imma try to get audio but we also have cameras with audio imma try and use them when my mom gets off

Rhodin265
I didn’t see this suggested, but since you’re paying for the streaming services, change your passwords and log out all devices. Giant toddlers don’t get their tanties rewarded with their stepkid’s Netflix.

Fromashination
It would be a dastardly shame if Step Dad's favorite shoes were accidentally left on the porch in the snow all night.

Update - 1 day later

Edit 1:I don't know how to add updates so imma just add an edit but my mom and me just got off the phone and she's pissed and otw home. She's currently otw home so me and my friend and her dad are otw to my house and my mom said she was gonna call the cops as soon as she get off the phone so they may be there by the time I get there. We've taken pictures and the uncle (my mom brother) will be over there by 8 bc I contacted him while at work. I've listened to all your suggestions about withdrawing my money out of my account so I thinking and I talked to my dad about that as well and told me I can stay with him
Edit/Update 2:When I got home my friend stayed in the car while her dad walked me in, and my step dad was already gone. However police were at the house. As of now police said they can’t really arrest him because it’s not like he broke the law of stealing (I don’t know how to explain it basically this theft isn’t breaking the law bc he washed it and didn’t keep it) they suggested I can get a confession and get him to pay or take him to small claims court. Also the dress is non refundable if damaged so I can’t return it or anything. While explaining to my mom what happened I kinda fumbled my words and started crying and she hugged me as I cried. And she said that he’s gonna pay for this, this financial issue has actually been a on going disagreement and I think he just pulled the last straw bc she is PISSED. Also I talked to my uncle and he’s actually off work and over his way over here.
Him and my stepdad apparently have a rough history since my dad has had a smart mouth towards him in the past. While explaining to my uncle what happened he said that it would be alright and if anything he’ll buy back the dress before it sells out, so I’ll have my dress by prom but he does expect my step dad to pay me back one way or another so I’m basically probably gonna get my dress for free. Maybe that’s a little win. I’ll update more probably later tonight. But things seem to be good.
Edit: Also to clear up some confusion I pay the streaming service bills bc I really want to watch the shows on those services and my mom works hard but doesn’t make enough to have those services on top so I’ve offer to pay them so we could have them. She not a horrible “I’ll pick my husband over you” mother and she always defend me and he’s never pulled a stunt like this just tries to convince her to control my money and savings. And she’s never spent my saving either. I feel like thats why they always clash because he has a mindset of we have all these financial troubles and your daughter could solve them with her savings and you have access to them.
Edit/Update 4: Okay so my uncle came over and he and my mom had a little argument bc he blamed her for enabling my stepdads behaviour by not leaving him and thats why he felt comfortable to do what he did. And she argued back saying she always defended me against him and has never taken any of my money (which is true). We all talked about it a bit and she revealed that last night they had actually had a argument about paying off a car payment because she made a comment about how all these bills are taking a toll on her, and he made a comment about how it wouldn’t be that much of a toll if she used my savings and didn’t allow me to spend it on foolishness and she got mad and defensive bc he keeps bringing it up.
He also said that the $900 I spent could’ve payed off that car payment for the next 2 months. Btw he only know about my savings because he know how’s much I get paid and that I’ve been saving all of it. So we think that’s what triggered him to throw my dress in the washer.
My mom and stepdad has also been texting back and fourth and he admitted that he washed it to teach me a lesson that I shouldn’t spend that much money on a dress that can be destroyed that easily but he put the setting on heavy duty so he obviously intended to destroy it. My uncle has also offered to replace the dress so I don’t need to worry about not getting to wear my special dress. We called the boutique and explained it to them and they say they can order another dress although it won’t be there until Feb 23 which fine tbh.
My mother sent my step dad a long threatening message basically calling him out shes kinda heated rn so imma try and ask for a screenshot later. Her and my father also spoke and decided that it’d be best that I get my own bank account so that my step dad can’t use the excuse that she has access to my account so that’s also great. My mom and I had a talk about what gonna happen after this and she said shes not sure as of just yet bc it’s all a little too much for her bc she seriously contemplating leaving him, but i guess she don’t wanna actively discuss that right now. Also my stepdad is currently at a friends house. I’ll continue to update possibly may get one tomorrow. My friends parent are gonna keep the dress over their house and imma pick it up tomorrow to have as proof.
Edit:I apologise for not being to update since Reddit took down my post because of a “no walls text rule” that I was unaware of but it’s all good now
Edit/Update 5: My uncle has transferred me $1000 for my prom dress and I’m actually planning on using the money for replace the dress and buy new shoes. He’s very well off, which was one reason I contacted him in the first place.
So I plan on just calling the boutique and seeing if they can reorder it and I’ll just pick it up from there sometime in February. However my step-dad still must pay in some form, or at least we are trying to get him to. My uncle has called my other uncles and aunts (with my permission) to basically vent about the situation.
So majority of my mom side who all live in GA knows about what happened. I woke up to a lot of text about the situation given sympathy, as well as money to have for prom which have totalled to about $300. So this is great. My mom has also contacted my step-in-laws who then spread the news with pictures and I guess most of them are shocked as well other than his mother his is buying his claim that it’s just a dress and it was a accident despite evidence. I got a call from my step-dad sister sympathising for me.
And through conversations with I learned that my step-dad has also been asking a lot of his family to help him with his finances. Because for some reason the dude has bought so many things to pay off he can’t keep up with them.
My mom called my step-dad for answers which we recorded. And he’s basically trying to blame her bc if she didn’t piss him off last night then he wouldn’t have done it. And that he was trying to show me why I shouldn’t be irresponsible with money bc I guess he planned to lecture afterwards.
Also my mom has broken up with him bc he blamed her for caring more about me than him, which is weird. Which ensured in a argument with her saying “you think i care about her more than you, your gonna see just how much I do”
Also they’ve been on a rocky relationship since he can’t manage money and this was her breaking point.

Comments

TaffyAppl
Just saw this update!! Now that you have the text, please show the police as confession as destruction of property and/or take him to court to pay for it. It’s not fair to your uncle. Once you get your step dad to pay up, you can pay your uncle back. Girl Good luck!

sherbear97124
What your step-dad did is called malicious mischief and is a crime. With the confessions and proof, there probably is a case. Just know that because of the monetary value, it's most likely just a misdemeanor charge. Regardless, you definitely have a small claims case against him. Sadly, by the sounds of his financial affairs, you'll be lucky if he ever pays, but it's still worth pursuing. Good luck!

Update - same day later

Edit/Update 6: Sorry to post on here Reddit keep telling me to try again later so sorry again
Okay so a lot of bs has transpired. Firstly we’ve place an order for my dress, and they are shipping it now and it should be at the boutique by Feb 23 so all that is taken care of. My SD and mom are officially broken up and my mom said she doesn’t now if she’ll move on with divorce proceedings yet bc everything is still fresh and lawyer are expensive and she can’t afford it rn.
Also they have a prenup so they don’t share assent and the house is my mother dad house she inherited (she had a different dad than all her siblings and all her siblings share a dad).
So my step father showed back up with his brother after a while and my step father decided to do and buy me a new dress from Macy that looks similar to dress in color and length but it’s very tacky and ugly. And look nothing like the original.
He then tried to apologise and said it wasn’t his intention to ruin the dress. he said that he was simply gonna wash it and say “see this is why you don’t buy things like this” and then he would’ve bought me another dress…. But that’s make absolutely no sense.
Also my uncle came back to my house after I texted him my step dad came back (he was at the store) and they got into a big argument where basically my uncle demanded to know why he destroyed the dress
And my step dad said he not gonna walk up in his house demanding shit, and my uncle called him a bitch. And then my SD said to call him a bitch again which he did and they ended up fighting. (My SD lost) he threatened to call the cops but we reminded him that he swung first
After that my step dad went on a tirade and cussed us out and left and took the dress with him.
We are actually planning on taking y’all advice and taking him to small claims court given the evidence and the damage. And hopefully we win. Also my SD is staying at his parents house currently.
Lastly for all curious about my brothers they are 15 (half) and 18 (step) .The 15 was at his girlfriend house since Friday so he wasn’t home for any of the commotion but did reach out to me today, I love him so much. And the 18 year basically sided with his dad so that all there is to say.
Also those who suggested changing the streaming’s passwords I have change them. And me and my mom are gonna get me my own bank account later today. Thank you guys for all the support I’ll continue to update as thing come and our plans of action and the verdict and all

Comments

I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

So when I was in sixth grade I had been friends with this girl I had known since fifth grade, she was a year younger than me. I'll call her Lilith. So the day started normally, except for the fact my younger sister (Mary) wasn't very happy, so our mom asked me to sit with her if she came to my classroom for lunch; I agreed as I am the oldest. In school the morning passed by normally, I tutored the kid I was assigned to, talked to friends including Lilith, did my school work, etc. Eventually lunch arrived and I broached the subject to Lilith that my mom had asked me to let my sister sit with me during lunch and asked Lilith if we could save her a seat just in case she wanted to sit with me. Everything seemed fine up until I asked if Mary could sit with us. Lilith had to go get her hot lunch from the office and Mary and I both packed home lunches. Lilith told me that if Mary sat in her (Lilith's) seat she (Lilith) would kill Mary. I told her that was rude, and that I would simply tell Mary that was where Lilith was sitting, so Mary could sit beside me or something. Lilith kept going on about how she would kill my sister over that stupid chair, and I sat there in silent seething rage. When Lilith went to the office to get her lunch I explained to our teacher what had happened and he said he would talk to her. Afterwards I sat with 'Teddy' the kid I tutored and 'Johnny' one of my other friends; I told them everything. Now this is where the petty comes in, Lilith had this obsessive crush on a kid a grade above me (who i will call Orion), and I had a minor crush on one of his friends (who i will call Dimitri); this is something Teddy and Johnny both knew. So they suggest telling the friend group Lilith and I were apart of. I agreed saying we would also tell her crush and mine. The plan: they (Teddy and Johnny) would go out first and tell Orion and Dimitri, meanwhile I would go and tell my sister and her friends (who were standing fairly close to my friend group so they over heard), after that I would go and finish the story to Orion and Dimitri. Well everything went according to plan, when Lilith came out and tried talking to Orion he told her to get away from him because he didn't want to hangout with a psycho (I didnt think he would go that far); and all except one of our friends turned their backs on her. The friend who sided with her told me I was a horrible person for doing that to Lilith, knowing what she (Lilith) had gone through. Something to know, Lilith's father had abandoned her and her mother before she was born; and her mother had gone to jail two or so years before for stealing, leaving Lilith in the care of her grandmother. Now it is my belief that no matter your background or how you grew up, threatening someone's life was and is unacceptable; and I told this "friend" exactly that. Then Lilith started to threaten me, in front of the entire forth, fifth, sixth grades (upper elementary) and middle school classes (we went to an elementary/combined middle school); saying things like she would ruin my life and ruin me, which only proved my point to the others, and I told her that if she came for me or my family she best be prepared for a fight (usually im not a confrontational person so this was a surprise to pretty much everyone). After school I told my mom what had happened and she talked with not only my and lilith's teacher but the principal of the school as well; which led to Lilith getting a talking to from the principal but not much else because of Lilith's background. The next day my teacher pretty much begged me to forgive Lilith, seeing as it was two weeks before summer break, and I told him I wouldnt even consider it until she apologized to my face; by this time Lilith had messaged me on Instagram saying how sorry she was Yada Yada blah blah blah and so on (to which i blocked her temporarily). So the teacher sent us both outside to reconcile; not realizing I had a different plan. Lilith tried to apologize but wouldn't look me in the eyes, my mother told me if someone ment their apology they would look you in the eyes and I told Lilith that and she tried again, again not looking me in the eye. Eventually, because she wouldn't look me in the eyes, I pretended to forgive her simply because I wanted this whole thing to end (and to prove my fake point unblocked her). I spent the next week or so pretending to be her friend (I never told my mom about this fake friendship thing, mostly because nothimg had been done about Lilith and I could be painted in a bad light for discrimination which wasnt the case because i knew about Lilith's home lige long before this whole situation and was still friends with her regardless; im not superficia, i care more about personality and things like money and appearance), and ghosted her the night of the big dance our school had like a week before the end of school; come to think of it i dont think she was even at the dance. And after the dance I started cutting back on how much time I spent around her, and I noticed pretty much everyone else did the same. Then on the last day of school, when I got home I immediately blocked her on everything: phone number, insta (all of her profiles), everything. AITAH?

To preface I’m a 33 years old now. I’m a guy and have really never talked to anyone about this. I’ve brought it up but it hasn’t really been taken seriously. I’ll try to make this story as short as possible. When I was 18 I was desperate to lose my virginity, but was way too shy to actually try. I was always envious of some friends and their stories of who they have been with so I decided to lie and say that I wasn’t a virgin. There were a couple girls I was really into and they invited me to a get together. Only 5 or more people were there so it was the perfect outing in my shy opinion. I knew one of the girls was very pretty, popular, and a cheerleader but I had my eyes set on her friend. She was much more kind, less outgoing and very cute. We were all having fun but the cheerleader was feeding us all shots. I had maybe drank once or twice before this point, but didn’t want to disappoint. After about 5 shots I started making out with the friend of the cheerleader. The cheerleader clearly wasn’t having it, definitely got jealous and put an end to it saying “let’s go back to your place.” She had drove us and I definitely needed a ride home so to my dismay I agreed. I was very drunk at this point and actually slammed my knee against her trailer hitch, but didn’t feel a thing. Again, she is very attractive and I was totally into her. I wanted to have sex, but I wasn’t ready. Especially given the circumstances. I know this all seems pretty convoluted, but this is how it went. We made it back to my mom’s apartment and I had mentioned we go to the hot tub. I was just trying to delay what would be the inevitable. We walk to the pool area where the hot tub is and it was perfect. I thought “okay we’re in the hot tub and we’ll just hangout here until we want to go to asleep.” What happened next was unexpected and I didn’t think was even possible being a guy. I was 18 and just assumed you would want to have sex whenever possible. She asked how many people I’ve been with and I said 3 (lying to seem “cooler”) and she hopped on my lap. Somehow I was hard hard and she grabbed me and put me inside of her. This has been the most confusing part of it all and what makes it so difficult to talk about. I WAS hard. I didn’t want to have sex. Not like that. Whenever that was done she wanted to go back to my apartment. I agreed. The last thing I remember is looking at myself in the mirror of by bathroom and saying “what am I doing” and going back to my room with her spread eagle. As I said I was eager to have sex, but not like this. It has been something that’s been on my mind ever sense and haven’t really talked about.

I dont know if I'm trying to look for answers or just trying to rant but here it goes.
For context, I live in Ontario (Canada).
These past couple of months have been really hard for my brother (34) and I (36). Two months ago, my dad (63) had a hemmoragic stroke. The first few weeks were scary as he couldnt talk and his whole right side was paralyzed. Since then, he has been recovering quite quickly with rehab and is now able to speak ( albeit with difficulties word finding and short term memory issues) and has some mobility on his right leg and arm but still extremely weak that he cannot do much with them. Since then, we have been taking care of our mom who suffers from psychosis, bipolar , depression and diabetes for the past 5 years or so and dad was the one always taking care of her. We are really scared on what the future entails now that this will likely be our new normal. POA for Property and Health is in place and brother and I are now officially appointed.
With our dad still going through rehabilitation, my brother and I have been attending to our mom's needs and their finances, however , it has been a constant struggle. She is extremely needy and cries the freaking blues when there is any kind of inconvenience (most of it caused by her ) such as the fridge going out (she buys an egrigious amount of groceries that she will never finish), the sink garbage dispenser being clogged ( she puts EVERYTHING in it ) and broke it more than once, and now we are getting a text from her that her toilet and shower is clogged (even though we told her she has more than one toilet and shower she can use in the interim). All she cares about is money and that she needs to buy things (her disability pension from her work is quite good, but she spends like it grows on trees and we had to limit her credit card usage and take her debit card away and making sure their bills are paid). We are thinking this is probably a high risk for dementia. Everything seems to be breaking with her being alone ( brother and I have our own place and both live in the same city as our parents)
I dont know what to do and its only been two freaking months of this and im already at my wits end. She CANNOT take care of herself (ironically , she knows to take her diabetic medications consistently) but refuses any other appointsments to help with her mental issues. We are scared that once dad is discharged from the hospital that their living arrangements will need to be changed and seperate, as there is no way mom will have the capacity ,both physically and mentally, to take care of dad (for f*** sake, she didnt even stay 1 hour at the hospital with dad when he first got admitted for his stroke because she said she was tired). Im extremely exhausted as I have my own issues with taking care of my business ,which is not doing so hot, and now helping take care of my dad's business ( we are both in the hospitality industry) but his is very profitable. All my family members tell me to make sure to take care of myself in order for us to take care of our parents. But how the heck can I when I'm being pulled left , right and center in everything. I barely have time for myself personally. My brother is doing as much as he can as well and I am lucky that we have a pretty good relationship and see eye to eye on a lot of things. I feel like at some point I'm going to spiral. Am I complaining too much? am I just weak?
Again , i dont know why im writing this. Maybe looking for others who have had similiar situations. I just want this nightmare to end.

But does anyone else ever think “I want to go home”
Not to your current home tho
To your childhood home...
The home where you had less worries, less responsibilities, the most memories, and everyone you loved under one roof.
The home that felt safer than any other place on earth at the time, even if it wasn’t.
I know this isn’t what it looked like for everyone and situations are different.
Despite feeling I was emotionally neglected and invalidated my entire childhood, somehow, on some of my hardest days, all I want to do is just go home, walk into the door of my childhood home after running around town with all my friends on hot summer days, greeted by my best pup who is so excited to see me. So excited in fact, that she is wagging her tail with such excitement it’s hitting the wall so hard she starts to bleed, (I miss you Kiara, my best pup.) There’s my dad tending to something around the house because he could never sit still, as always, and my mom watching her favorite show while folding laundry. As I walk into the living room, shed open one of her arms to signal me to come snuggle and watch with her, she’d end up giving me some sort of massage or playing with my hair. Dad started dinner and you immediey know what it is. TACO NIGHT! My favorite! Every summer int he first day the pool was open and swimmable, it was tradition my dad would throw me in, didn’t matter what I was wearing, I’d I had my phone etc. Hed give me a few seconds to kick my shoes off, but I always put up a fight because it was FREEZING.
These are the moments you never knew you’d so desperately miss. The moments when things seemed so hard but really you had it so easy, everyone was so close, family still lived nearby and you all got together every chance you could get. The last few years since Covid haven’t come easy.
Today, I just want to go home.

I have no one. I think my dog has been the only thing keeping me here, I know he’ll be sad without me. It’s really hot where I live and he overheated even though he was inside all day. He started to convulse and his eyes looked distant, like he was going to die. My heart sank. I told him if you go, I go. I called my mom for help, she didn’t care, just told me to take him to a vet. He’s okay now but I’m not. I’m 25, living in Phoenix and my life feels like a waste. Like I’ve failed at everything. I don’t think I’m going to leave a note or anything. I’ve held onto this feeling for most of my conscious life. It doesn’t get better, like I’m stuck. Medication failed me, I have no friends, and family don’t care about me. My partner doesn’t care, they’ve just used me like every ex I’ve had in the past. Our relationship felt like a shallow lie this whole 2 years but I went along with it because of how little I care about myself. Misplaced hopes and happiness, you know? How can a person be so shallow and pathetic that they lead you on, just because they’re afraid of being alone? I shouldn’t have gotten involved. Here I am, 2 years of my life wasted, again by some one who manipulated me. I kicked them out earlier today because I’m tired of fighting and hearing the excuse of ‘I don’t know what I want, I don’t want a serious future right now’. Yet they wanted that originally and all the infatuation went away. I’m tired of being played out like this. I don’t think all the sleep in the world would rejuvenate me. I want to rest. My heart is worn out and my soul is tired. I prayed to God earlier, I guess I’ll see where I end up

I’m a fucking wreck today.
I distracted myself as much as possible, as I’m usually amazing at doing. My schedule is jam-packed, which I will usually complain about to seem somewhat normal. “Ugh, I have so much to do this week…” as if I didn’t plan every single thing.
It’s harder to feel down when you’re always on the go. When you look good, when you stay in the gym, when you surround yourself with friends and family, when you work your ass off… at least that’s what I’ve always told myself. That’s what works for me.
Usually works. About once a month or so, my feelings catch up. It doesn’t matter where I’m at or what I’m doing – they’ll catch up. Suddenly I’m overwhelmed and I cry. Female rage consumes me and I scream in the car. I’ll try to push through when I get where I need to be – sometimes it’s work, sometimes it’s running errands. Today it was the gym. But my energy leaves me high and dry.
My bright aura is no longer with me and I’m numb. My eyes that were once filled with tears are now narrow. I cut my day short and I get back into my car because when my energy leaves me, I listen to my body and my soul. I need a minute to sulk. My drive home that is normally a full-blown concert is now silence, and it’s never been louder.
I run a hot shower when I get home in which I sit down and cry. I bury my head into my knees and I hug my legs until I feel ashamed because I live a privileged life. I dry off and before I put on any clothes, I go to the kitchen and pour a glass of red wine. Priorities. Just one glass, I say.
I cook myself a nice dinner. Nothing cures sadness like self care, wine, and a good TikTok binge, right? Tonight it was loaded baked potato soup – and it was incredible. The wine was also incredible. So incredible that one glass turned into two.
I layed out on the couch and laughed my ass off at TikToks. Temporarily, I was happy. Then I got a text from someone I really don’t even talk to – “I know what you’re going through. I’m here if you need anything.” Suddenly I’m overwhelmed again – I’m grateful and I’m sad. Grateful because I am lucky enough to always have people in my corner, but sad because somehow I still always feel alone. I think it’s an immediate response because no matter how many times people have said that, I always go through it alone.
My mom is never there, my friends are never there, my dad is never there. I feel like since I was eighteen years old, the only person that has ever truly looked out for me is me. The only being that has ever been there for me since then is my dog. So my immediate response is, I’m alone in this.
Granted, I love my parents and my family and my friends. They’re there in the good times, and they make the good times so much better. Most don’t know about these times, except for my mom. I’ll call my mom occasionally, only to be disappointed that it never makes me feel better. Worse actually. It’s never her fault, we just don’t connect like that. We never have for as long as I can remember. I always make the mistake of thinking that one day, we can get on that level. My delusion often results in disappointment.
One glass turns into a hefty three and suddenly I’m writing. Writing has always been an outlet for me, and I feel better now. I feel numb again. My feelings have left me high and dry as I type and I drink. Tomorrow I’ll wake up early, put on a pretty ass outfit, do my makeup, and act like this never happened. I’ll make my matcha and romanticize the fuck out of my life.
I make it seem like I’m doing great, like my life is perfect. But once a month, I remember that I am 26 years old and I’m alone. No matter how much I travel, no matter how much I spend, no matter how good I look, there’s this overwhelming feeling that consumes me at least once a month. I cry so hard I fall to my knees, I laugh maniacally, I drink myself to sleep, and then I wake up in the morning like everything is okay. Because it is, right? It’s just a monthly wreck.

Over the course of the past few months I have been working on compiling a list of my 500 favorite songs. It was sort of challenge that I gave myself and I'm super pumped with how it turned out. There were a few rules (only 5 songs per artist being the big rule, among a few others), and here's the list I came up with. Thought it was fun, so wanted to share here and see if it might spark any discussion about song placement, lack of songs/artists, or see if anyone had any similar lists. All thoughts are welcome! (and if you don't care to comb through all 500 songs for your favorite song or artist I'm more than happy to help you track 'em down)

Trash Panda - Aging out of the 20th Century
Djo - Roddy
The Beatles - Don't Let Me Down
Snail Mail - Heat Wave
Phoebe Bridgers - Savior Complex
Joji - SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK
The Shins - The Fear
Talking Heads - This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody)
The Cranberries - Linger
Post Animal - Ralphie
Hop Along - Not Abel
The Beach Boys - Heroes And Villains
Electric Light Orchestra - Livin' Thing
The Monkees - As We Go Along
Blondie - Heart Of Glass
The Strokes - Oblivius
Chet Baker - It's Always You
The Beatles - Rain
Electric Light Orchestra - Telephone Line
Husbands - Must Be a Cop
Faces - Ooh La La
The Flaming Lips - Do You Realize??
Frank Ocean - Nights
Harry James - It's Been a Long, Long Time
The Turtles - Happy Together
Etta James - At Last
The Zombies - The Way I Feel Inside
The Beatles - Here, There And Everywhere
The Beach Boys - God Only Knows
Kanye West - Father Stretch My Hands Pt. 1
Briston Maroney - Sinkin'
John Lennon - Oh My Love
Herb Alpert & The Tijuana Brass - Ladyfingers
Squirrel Flower - Headlights
The Backseat Lovers - Maple Syrup
The B-52's - Rock Lobster
George Harrison - All Things Must Pass
Snail Mail - Ben Franklin
Laura Elliott - Grass Stains
Djo - Chateau (Feel Alright)
Tame Impala - Eventually
The Backseat Lovers - Snowbank Blues
Claude Debussy - Clair de Lune
The Weeknd - Save Your Tears
Talking Heads - Thank You for Sending Me an Angel
The Zombies - Time of the Season
The War On Drugs - Nothing to Find
Queen - Brighton Rock
The Dream Academy - Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want
The B-52's - Strobe Light
The Cranberries - Dreams
Fugees - Killing Me Softly With His Song
Molchat Doma - Тоска
Tyler, The Creator - ARE WE STILL FRIENDS?
The Mamas & The Papas - Dream A Little Dream Of Me
The Chords - Sh-Boom
The Beatles - The Abbey Road Medley
The Ronettes - Be My Baby
The Who - Baba O'Riley
Dr. Dog - Where'd All the Time Go?
M83 - My Tears Are Becoming A Sea
Billie Eilish - everything i wanted
Outkast - Hey Ya!
Nat King Cole - Orange Colored Sky
The Notorious B.I.G. - Hypnotize
Four Tops - Reach Out I'll Be There
Foreign Air - Shut Up and Show Me
Leonard Cohen - So Long, Marianne
dodie - If I'm Being Honest
Briston Maroney - June
Post Malone - Sunflower
John Lennon - Isolation
Buddy Holly & The Crickets - Not Fade Away
Phoebe Bridgers - I Know The End
Kanye West - All Falls Down
Alvvays - Adult Diversion
John Lennon - Beautiful Boy (Darling Boy)
Clairo - Amoeba
The Beach Boys - I Know There's An Answer
Paul McCartney - Let Me Roll It
Frank Ocean - Ivy
Radiohead - Motion Picture Soundtrack
Djo - Mutual Future (Repeat)
Phoebe Bridgers - Scott Street
Childish Gambino - Me and Your Mama
Pink Floyd - Astronomy Domine
The Pied Pipers - Dream
The Beach Boys - All I Wanna Do
Djo - Change
Второй этаж поражает - Крайности
Little Richard - Lucille
King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Shanghai
Chet Baker - Deep In A Dream
The Beatles - It's All Too Much
Post Animal - Dirtpicker
The B-52's - Love Shack
EDEN - foreve/over
Kanye West - Ultralight Beam
The Zombies - Going Out Of My Head
Talking Heads - Found a Job
Snail Mail - Pristine
Tom Tom Club - Genius of Love
Tears For Fears - Everybody Wants To Rule The World
WILLIS - I Think I Like When It Rains
Chet Baker - But Not For Me
Naked Eyes - Always Something There to Remind Me
Tyler, The Creator - GONE, GONE / THANK YOU
Djo - Half Life
Trash Panda - Check Please
Briston Maroney - Deep Sea Diver
Beach Fossils - This Year
Momma - Medicine
Hop Along - Prior Things
Talking Heads - Road to Nowhere
Electric Light Orchestra - Turn to Stone
Briston Maroney - It's Not My Fault
Tyler, The Creator - NEW MAGIC WAND
Snail Mail - Headlock
Phil Collins - Take Me Home
Gotye - Somebody That I Used To Know
The Beach Boys - Do It Again
Tame Impala - Breathe Deeper
Ella Fitzgerald - Misty
Phoebe Bridgers - Waiting Room
Kanye West - Runaway
Daft Punk - Get Lucky (feat. Pharrell Williams and Nile Rodgers)
Dire Straits - Money for Nothing
Kendrick Lamar - Alright
Black Country, New Road - Concorde
George Harrison - If Not for You
Harry Styles - Cherry
Ms. Lauryn Hill - Doo Wop (That Thing)
Paul McCartney - Junk
Wings - Maybe I'm Amazed [Live]
Talking Heads - Houses in Motion
Del Water Gap - Ode to a Conversation Stuck in Your Throat
Pixies - Where Is My Mind?
Queen - Seven Seas Of Rhye
Paul McCartney - Jet
Sufjan Stevens - Death with Dignity
A Flock Of Seagulls - I Ran (So Far Away)
Tame Impala - Let It Happen
Led Zeppelin - Whole Lotta Love
Clairo - Management
Tommy James & The Shondells - I Think We're Alone Now
Fergie - Clumsy
Childish Gambino - This Is America
Prefab Sprout - The King of Rock 'N' Roll
Joy Again - Looking Out for You
Beach House - Space Song
John Lennon - Mind Games
The Weeknd - Gasoline
Weezer - Buddy Holly
Phoebe Bridgers - Sidelines
Tame Impala - New Person, Same Old Mistakes
Lana Del Rey - A&W
The Dillards - I've Just Seen a Face
The Doors - Break on Through (To the Other Side)
Julie London - I'm Glad There Is You
2Pac - California Love
Dean Martin - Everybody Loves Somebody
Snail Mail - Anytime
The Strokes - The Adults Are Talking
Jordana, TV Girl - Better in the Dark
Juice WRLD - Hide (feat. Seezyn)
The Wild Reeds - Get Better
Finom - Mine
Hop Along - One That Suits Me
The Killers - Mr. Brightside
Michael Cera - Clay Pigeons
Clairo - Bags
Prince - Let's Go Crazy
The Zombies - She's Not There
Blackstreet - No Diggity
Frank Sinatra - I've Got You Under My Skin
John Denver - Take Me Home, Country Roads
Harry James - I'm Beginning to See The Light
The Clash - London Calling
Charles Bradley - Changes
Buddy Holly - (Ummmm, Oh Yeah) Dearest
Eagles - Seven Bridges Road [Live]
Moxie - Honey
Faces - Stay with Me
Post Animal - How Do You Feel
New Order - Age of Consent
Natalie Imbruglia - Torn
Lana Del Rey - Doin' Time
Twin Peaks - Blue Coupe
Kanye West - Gold Digger
Fruit Bats - The Bottom of It
Frank Sinatra - Somethin' Stupid
Lorde - Perfect Places
Martha Tilton - Exactly Like You
King Crimson - 21st Century Schizoid Man
Glen Campbell - Southern Nights
Claire Rosinkranz - Frankenstein
Guillemots - Made-Up Lovesong #43
Fleetwood Mac - Say You Love Me
Frankie Valli - Can't Take My Eyes off You
The Crickets - Don't Ever Change
Paul Anka - Put Your Head On My Shoulder
George Harrison - Isn't It a Pity
Trash Panda - Off
Super Besse - Holod
Beyoncé - Hold Up
Charlie Burg - I Don't Wanna Be Okay Without You
Eagles - Peaceful Easy Feeling
Ella Fitzgerald - It's A Lovely Day Today
PERMSKY KRAY - Дорогой Человек
The Little Dippers - Forever
The B-52's - There's a Moon in the Sky (Called the Moon)
Patti Page - Old Cape Cod
Daft Punk - Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger
The Soggy Bottom Boys - I Am A Man Of Constant Sorrow
Trash Panda - Things Will Never Change
Hop Along - Well-dressed
Sixpence None The Richer - Kiss Me
TV Girl - Daughter of a Cop
LAUNDRY DAY - Jane
Tyler, The Creator - EARFQUAKE
Sigue Sigue Sputnik - Love Missile F1-11
Joji - Gimme Love
The Backseat Lovers - Pool House
The Weeknd - Take My Breath
Mild High Club - Homage
Doc Watson - Am I Born to Die?
Daniel Caesar - Streetcar
The Kinks - Sunny Afternoon
John Lennon - #9 Dream
Tame Impala - Elephant
Chuck Berry - You Never Can Tell
Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
KIDS SEE GHOSTS - 4th Dimension
Soft Cell - Tainted Love
The B-52's - Song for a Future Generation
Gnarls Barkley - Crazy
Lana Del Rey - Blue Jeans
Billie Eilish - Halley's Comet
Glenn Miller - In the Mood
Kid Bloom - Control
The Cinematic Orchestra - To Build A Home
Marvin Gaye - I Heard It Through The Grapevine
Brenda Lee - If You Love Me (Really Love Me)
TV Girl - Lovers Rock
Art Lown - Knew You Well
Dean Martin - Ain't That A Kick In The Head
Miniature Tigers - Like or Like Like
Electric Light Orchestra - Sweet Talkin' Woman
The Hunts - Ages
The Cars - Good Times Roll
Bill Withers - Lovely Day
Drake - God's Plan
Kansas - Point of Know Return
The Neighbourhood - Stargazing
The Clash - Rock the Casbah
Hop Along - What the Writer Meant
Briston Maroney - Under My Skin
Jack Stauber - Buttercup
King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Ya Love
Ginger Root - Loretta
Thompson Twins - Hold Me Now
Frank Ocean - Pyramids
Kate Bush - Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God)
Destroy Boys - I Threw Glass at My Friend's Eyes and Now I'm on Probation
Mild High Club - Dionysian State
Franz Ferdinand - Take Me Out
Kevin Abstract - Empty
The Frights - Crust Bucket
Stealers Wheel - Stuck In The Middle With You
The Shins - Fighting in a Sack
fun. - We Are Young (feat. Janelle Monáe)
Lil Uzi Vert - Money Longer
Miniature Tigers - Cannibal Queen
The Doors - Touch Me
Jean Dawson - Clear Bones
King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Catching Smoke
Molchat Doma - Люди Надоели
The Go-Go's - Our Lips Are Sealed
Billie Eilish - ocean eyes
BOYO - Crown
The 1975 - Somebody Else
Husbands - She's a Betty
Syd Barrett - If It's In You
Trash Panda - Atlanta Girls
Frank Ocean - Godspeed
Alice Phoebe Lou - Glow
Childish Gambino - Redbone
New Order - Blue Monday
Post Animal - Schedule
Harry Styles - Fine Line
Harry James - I'll Get By (As Long As I Have You)
Depeche Mode - Never Let Me Down Again
Chet Baker - I Fall In Love Too Easily
The Cranberries - Put Me Down
John Mayer - Edge of Desire
George Harrison - All Those Years Ago
Electric Light Orchestra - The Diary of Horace Wimp
Alex Clare - Too Close
Eric B. & Rakim - Know The Ledge
Peter Frampton - Show Me The Way [Live]
Simon & Garfunkel - Mrs. Robinson
Black Eyes - Deformative
The Righteous Brothers - Unchained Melody
Bonny Light Horseman - Deep In Love
The Walker Brothers - The Sun Ain't Gonna Shine Anymore
Cage The Elephant - Cigarette Daydreams
Hot Flash Heat Wave - Raindrop
Clairo - Sofia
Kendrick Lamar - PRIDE.
Camille Saint-Saëns - The Swan
Weezer - Say It Ain't So
C418 - Sweden
Lana Del Rey - Let The Light In (feat. Father John Misty)
The Postal Service - Such Great Heights
Pickin' On Series - Those to Come
Lana Del Rey - Grandfather please stand on the shoulders of my father while he's deep-sea fishing (feat. RIOPY)
John Mayer - Moving On and Getting Over
Field Medic - POWERFUL LOVE
Cage The Elephant - Flow
Joji - Run
The Who - Won't Get Fooled Again
Boston - Peace of Mind
Ben E. King - This Magic Moment
David Bowie - Starman
Beastie Boys - Sabotage
Harry Belafonte - Banana Boat (Day-O)
Gene Krupa & His Orchestra - Rhumboogie
The Cardigans - Lovefool
The Kinks - You Really Got Me
The Zombies - She's Coming Home
Michael Jackson - Thriller
Moxie - Blue Skies
The Mamas & The Papas - Straight Shooter
Peter, Paul and Mary - Don't Think Twice, It's All Right
Green Day - Brain Stew
Dua Lipa - Levitating (feat. DaBaby)
The Police - Roxanne
Britney Spears - Toxic
Tears For Fears - Head Over Heels
Rex Orange County - Pluto Projector
The Strokes - Call It Fate, Call It Karma
Portugal. The Man - Feel It Still
The Black Crowes - Twice As Hard
Ted Nugent - Stranglehold
fun. - Some Nights
Wings - Silly Love Songs
Paramore - Still into You
Peter Frampton - Baby, I Love Your Way [Live]
The Monkees - Last Train to Clarksville
Royel Otis - Oysters In My Pocket
The Backseat Lovers - Growing/Dying
Nelly Furtado - Say It Right
Post Animal - Goggles
Erik Satie - Gymnopédie No. 1
Childish Gambino - IV. Sweatpants
Steely Dan - Dirty Work
ABBA - Lay All Your Love On Me
Still Woozy - Goodie Bag
Arlo Parks - Black Dog
Goth Babe - Weekend Friend
George & the Handsomes - Sleepy Beats
boygenius - 20
The Mills Brothers - You Always Hurt The One You Love
Travis Scott - SICKO MODE
Pinegrove - Need 2
The Backseat Lovers - Sinking Ship
Franz Schubert - Ave Maria
Zac Brown Band - Knee Deep (feat. Jimmy Buffett)
Justin Timberlake - Mirrors
Simon & Garfunkel - Cecilia
The Cranberries - Zombie
Daniel Caesar - Japanese Denim
Billie Holiday - Easy Living
ISLAND - By Your Side
Phil Collins - Tomorrow Never Knows
Bob Dylan - The Times They Are A-Changin'
The Four Freshmen - Day By Day
Fleetwood Mac - The Chain
Billy Joel - Big Shot
Billie Eilish - Happier Than Ever
Yot Club - down bad
Rihanna - Stay
Fleetwood Mac - Landslide
Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky - Swan Lake, Op. 20, Act 2: No. 10, Scene. Moderato
The White Stripes - Fell In Love With a Girl
Alvvays - Easy On Your Own?
Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit - If We Were Vampires
Blackway - What's Up Danger (with Black Caviar)
Albert Hammond - It Never Rains in Southern California
Matt Maltese - Jupiter
John Denver - Mother Nature's Son
Childish Gambino - Sober
Claire Rosinkranz - Pools and Palm Trees
The Cars - Just What I Needed
The Doors - Light My Fire
Blondie - Tomorrow Never Knows
King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Hell's Itch
The Japanese House - Saw You In A Dream
Franz Schubert - String Quartet No. 13 in A Minor, Op. 29 No. 1, D. 804
The Drifters - White Christmas
The 1975 - Robbers
George Harrison - Between The Devil And The Deep Blue Sea
The Frights - Tongues
Paramore - Ain't It Fun
Billy Joel - Pressure
Frank Sinatra - My Way
Art Lown - Going Back to Carolina
Bruno Mars - Just the Way You Are
Under The Rug - Lonesome & Mad
The Mamas & The Papas - Dedicated To The One I Love
Foster The People - Sit Next to Me
Weezer - Undone - The Sweater Song
Michael Jackson - Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'
Tia Blake - Plastic Jesus
Los Bravos - Bring a Little Lovin'
Lady Gaga - Bad Romance
Minnie Riperton - Les Fleurs
Billy Idol - Dancing with Myself
Cody Fry - I Hear a Symphony
Gringo Sapiens - Driver's Licence
Vacations - Relax
Glitter Party - time waits
Steve Lacy - Bad Habit
The Crystals - Then He Kissed Me
The Pied Pipers - Mairzy Doats
Mitski - Bug Like an Angel
James Ray - I've Got My Mind Set On You
Clairo - Bubble Gum
Masayoshi Takanaka - SEXY DANCE
Nat King Cole - (I Love You) For Sentimental Reasons
Sleigh Bells - Crown On the Ground
Olivia Rodrigo - favorite crime
No Doubt - Just A Girl
Foreigner - Long, Long Way from Home
Heart - Crazy On You
The Hunts - Darlin'
David Bowie - Heroes
Alice Phoebe Lou - Hammer
Thee Oh Sees - Toe Cutter - Thumb Buster
Roar - I Can't Handle Change
TV Girl - Birds Dont Sing
Laufey - From The Start
Chas McDevitt Skiffle Group - Freight Train (feat. Nancy Whiskey)
Metro Boomin - Am I Dreaming
Liana Flores - rises the moon
POP ETC - Speak Up
Jean Knight - Mr. Big Stuff
The Platters - Twilight Time
Derek & The Dominos - Layla
King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Homeless Man in Adidas
Charlie Burg - Lovesong (The Way)
Hot Flash Heat Wave - Gutter Girl
ABBA - Fernando
Mitski - My Love Mine All Mine
Savannah Conley - More Than Fine
Young the Giant - Mind Over Matter
Future Crib - Yer Movin'
Bob Dylan - Like a Rolling Stone
benches - Violent
Musical Youth - Pass The Dutchie
Olivia Rodrigo - vampire
Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone - City Of Stars
Maya Hawke - Thérèse
Current Joys - A Different Age
Wayne Newton - Danke Schoen
La Roux - Bulletproof
Jason Segel, Walter - Man Or Muppet
U2 - I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For
The Raconteurs - Steady, As She Goes
The Ink Spots - Into Each Life Some Rain Must Fall
Ace of Base - The Sign
Vulfpeck - 1612
Nordista Freeze - Hey GiGi
The Chainsmokers - New York City
Suki Waterhouse - Johanna
Pete Rodriguez - I Like It Like That
Calvin Harris - Summer
The Rare Occasions - Notion
a-ha - Take on Me
Rush - Working Man
Traffic - Dear Mr. Fantasy
Starbuck - Moonlight Feels Right
Van Halen - Drop Dead Legs
The Troggs - Wild Thing
Led Zeppelin - Good Times Bad Times
The Byrds - Turn! Turn! Turn! (To Everything There Is a Season)
Cream - Sunshine Of Your Love
Justin Timberlake - SexyBack (feat. Timbaland)
David Bowie - Suffragette City
Ludwig van Beethoven - Sonata No. 14 in C-Sharp Minor, Op. 27, No. 2 "Moonlight"
Avicii - Wake Me Up
The Who - La-La-La-Lies
The Spinners - The Rubberband Man
MGMT - Time to Pretend
Hootie & The Blowfish - Only Wanna Be With You
Sheck Wes - Mo Bamba
Claire Rosinkranz - 123
Ringo Starr - Photograph
The Proclaimers - I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)
Duran Duran - Rio