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TLDR; This guy I don’t really know clearly has feelings for me. He seems sweet but I’m hesitant because I’m trans and his parents are apparently conservative. Guy is also trying a bit too hard and recently tried to impress me by potentially lying about being a fan of theater.
Heya, so I’m curious to see what people’s thoughts are on a little… situation I’m in. I (transmasc Junior) realized recently that a classmate (male Junior) almost certainly has feelings for me. I’ll call him “Kay” for now. Let me explain.
In my 6th period, I don’t really interact with people much. I’m certainly not shy, but it’s one of those core classes that has a mix of everyone and non of your usual crowd, so you end up struggling to make friends. Theres this small group of guys that I get along fairly well with, they’re accepting of my identity, really chill, and just the kind of dorks that I love surrounding myself with. Because I’ve always sorta had those four, I’ve never breached out to the rest of the class. Which is why it was unusual when another guy (who istg I had NEVER interacted with) approached me while we were changing seats for assigned groups and suddenly said hi. This is Kay.
It was a simple greeting and I thought nothing of it. I asked if he was in my assigned group, and he didn’t really respond and awkwardly shuffled away. Alright, a little weird, but nothing harmful and I forgot about it.
Two days later, the whole class is waiting outside for our teacher to show up and open the door. Kay suddenly approaches me and asked how I was. Reminder that I DON’T KNOW THIS GUY. I didn’t even know his NAME until a week after our first interaction when I overheard the teacher call him. He knew mine though, and I ended up feeling ridiculously guilty for it for that week I was trying to figure out what was happening.
Anyway, I digress.
When he asked me how I was, I was honest and told him I was looking forward to going home because of how tired I was from rehearsals. He asks about what I was rehearsing for, and I explained that I’m in my theater classes’s final show where we host it entirely on our own. But because of how little time we were given, we’ve been hauling ass with rehearsals that last from right after school until 7:30 at night. Then he did something that no one has ever done to me before:
He asked me to save him a ticket. He WANTED to go to this play I was in. No one besides immediate family ever wanted to go to a production I was in. Like… fuck, okay, if that isn’t a sign, I don’t know what is. I told him that I’d let him know when tickets went live.
Flash forward to that following Monday, our teacher spontaneously decided to change up the seating layout in her classroom and told people to sit wherever they wanted that day. I took a random seat and Kay sits, not next to me, but like a table over. I guess trying to not be too obvious? But then he hits me with this ringer “Hey Evan! How was your weekend” It was alright “Did you go to prom?” (Prom was that previous weekend)
Woah.
Now that felt like he just asked me if I was single.
So I tell him “Nah, not this year. But I will next year, for sure.”
His response? “Oh! Well, if you’re not going with anyone, maybe we could go together next year?” Then followed by the quick backtrack of: “As friends!”
Oh. Oh he is stupid. But it’s a kind of cute stupid that I don’t actually mind all that much. It’s sort of endearing how silly it is.
We don’t interact too much after that, I would note that during a class debate where we were split into two teams, he and I happened to be on the same team. Really, I was the only one on my team debating (and, not to brag, but to totally I won my team the debate and I was arguing the opposite of what I actually believed in), but he was the only one who tried to pitch in. Now what he said was out of pocket and didn’t match the stance I was going with at all, but it was sweet how he tried to help. He even leaned over after everything was said and done and thanked for winning the debate for my team.
Really, he seems sweet, but I barely know him. All I know is that he’s in the Medical Technology classes (based on how he wears scrubs once in a while) and apparently plays Call of Duty because he asked if I played. I might download it, just in case he asks again. I’m not the type to fall head over heels quickly. It takes me time. Especially as a trans guy who needs to be careful who they befriend and date because I never know what someone’s opinions of me or my identity is. Or if they even realize I am trans. I dress rather androgynous, leaning towards masculine, and my hair goes down to my collar bone in a sort of wolf-cut mullet thing. I’m short. I don’t passes very well, a lot of people tend to think I am just a bit androgynous rather than transmasc. I should be starting hormone replacement therapy later this summer, but this guy doesn’t know that. Sure I’m not traditionally feminine in the slightest and he has to be okay with that if he’s got a thing for me now. But does he know to what extent that goes? Is he just hoping for a tomboy girlfriend and not a boyfriend? Fuck, man, I don’t know.
With Kay, I’m particularly concerned because when I brought this up in my Theater class, I got two different responses which were not… great. One of my classmates literally squealed “EW!” because apparently he wasn’t a great guy in middle school. But I’m willing to see past that since that was 3+ years ago. People change and middle school tends to bring out the worst in everyone (middle schoolers are VICIOUS). But then my teacher had this sort of “Oh no…” kind of look. She explained that he’s a sweet guy, but his family is also extremely conservative. However, his older brother is apparently gay, so there’s that. Does he take after his brother or his parents? I genuinely have no clue, but I am praying to whatever got that is out there that he’s the former.
So yeah. Terrified of giving this guy a chance. I’m not disinterested, I want to give it a chance, get to know him before deciding how I feel because I literally have no way of knowing until we can have actual conversations beyond “how was your day?”
Then there’s today. We had another short “how are you” conversation and I told him I was stressed (again, because of my show), and he laid it on heavy that he was hoping to go, and I told him “Yeah! I remember you asking me to save you a ticket, but I’m not confident in its quality right now. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a theater production, but if you haven’t I wouldn’t want this one to be your first.”
He responds with: “Oh no, it’s not my first time, I’ve seen Hamilton and the nutcracker and stuff like that. I like theater.”
I was so excited at first because I thought he genuinely had an interest in Theater, but then a minute later I realized we saw both of those shows in our history class: one was Hamilton on Disney+ and we watched it when we were learning about the Revolution and what not, the other was when we saw a Ballet troupe perform the Nutcracker in our theater because our teacher was a guest dancer in it.
This. Mother fucker. Pretty much lied to my face to impress me. I don’t know if I should feel flattered that he’s trying so hard or insulted that he thought I’d fall for it.
I don’t even know how I feel. I almost want to just call him out and tell him to just ask for my number instead of trying to be someone he’s not to impress me. I might just do that. I’ll think about it.
Anywho, give me your thoughts on the situation. I’m at a loss, and tbh, my friends aren’t being the most helpful. Meanwhile my mom is telling me to play hard to get, which just feels cruel considering how hard he’s already trying.

So, I just got through watching One Piece and I have a few theories. To be honest, I haven’t looked to deep into what's already out there, besides just clarifying some facts for myself online so feel free to show me some things that I have missed. It’s possible some of this is already circulating around. I really just want to try and put my ramblings into one place. Spoilers for One Piece!
Ok, so there's a few separate theories to this but most of it has to do with Blackbeard and his motivations. One thing I find interesting is that Blackbeard, even since he was a part of Whitebeards crew, has been looking for very strong devil fruits and seems to have intimate knowledge of the ones he is seeking. The first one he sought out was the Dark-Dark fruit which among other things seems to be capable of stopping, and possibly stealing other devil fruit powers. One of his crew members, Shiryu, was seen to have the Clear-Clear fruit ability which already belonged to another character. I have to assume he knew about this before he found and acquired this fruit. Which begs the question, why does he know so much about this fruit? He is now able to use that power to steal powers for himself and his crew. We haven't gotten confirmation that the Dark-Dark fruit can do this, but just like a lot of things about this post, I’m going to be assuming that this is the case. In stealing these devil fruit abilities, he has to be very aware of not only what these fruits can do but who is currently using them. Law, in a recent episode, even alludes to the fact that he is hunting down devil fruit users. Now Burgess has the Strong-Strong fruit. Again, where is he getting this information? He obviously knew what Whitebeards devil fruit was capable of from the time he spent with him, and decided that of all the devil fruits he could have, he wanted that ability. Granted, it is an incredibly strong fruit, one worthy of an emperor of the sea, but with his intimate knowledge of devil fruits there had to be a reason Teach went after that one for himself. I think I have a possible answer.
Now this next part, I think is a common theory floating around out there but it is necessary for the rest of what is to come. Teach is one of the only people we have seen have multiple devil fruit abilities. This is crazy enough in itself, but if you notice, he stopped at just the two. Why not just take many devil fruit powers for himself and become the strongest out there? I think it's because he has the Zoan type Cerberus fruit. I mean, his jolly rodger is a Cerberus head. This could possibly make him three beings in one, allowing him to have three devil fruits. A Zoan type Cerberus fruit, a Paramecia fruit in the Quake-Quake fruit, and a Logia in the Dark-Dark fruit. Teach is smart. I think a big part of his motivations led him to intimately knowing about the powers of these three fruits. He knew if he acquired the Cerberus fruit then he could hold three devil fruit abilities and somehow figured out where that fruit was. Then I think he knew that if he joined Whitebeard for long enough he would eventually be led to the Dark-Dark fruit and be able to steal other abilities which were already taken. Then, once he had the opportunity he stole the most important fruit for his purposes, the quake-quake fruit.
Making even more assumptions, we need to look at the ancient weapon Pluton. What we know now is that Pluton is a world ending weapon, specifically a ship that was built a long time ago in Water 7, and that those blueprints were passed down until they reached Franky. We also just found out that it is sunken beneath Wano. Wano is a country that has massive walls built around it. The ancient settlement far below what is now Wano is where the ship actually resides, and those walls would need to be broken to retrieve the ship.
Now we're gonna talk a bit about the World Government. Specifically in regard to the Five Elders. Each one is named in some way after a planet in our solar system. St. Topman Warcury (Mercury), St. Ethan Baron V. Nusjuro (assuming the V. is for Venus), St. Marcus Mars (Mars), St. Shepard Ju Peter (Jupiter), and St. Jaygarcia Saturn (Saturn). The three ancient weapons are the rest of the planets. Uranus, Poseidon (Which the roman name would be Neptune), and Pluton (or Pluto). Poseidon, we know is also a person, Shirahoshi. It would make sense that Uranus and Pluton were also actual, physical people. But Pluton is a ship. However, we have seen before that ships in the One Piece world can have their own spirits, or personas. This has been shown with the Going Merry and the Sunny. The exact lore behind how this happens isnt totally clarified and so I think there are things about it we haven’t been told yet. It's possible that Pluton is not just a magnificent war ship but also holds the spirit of what may have been one of these Elders of the World government. Some kind of all encompassing power that has had major effects on the world in the past.
Now, going back to Blackbeard for a sec, if he does have a Cerberus devil fruit that has more interesting implications. Cerberus is the hound of Hades, the three headed dog that guards the entrance to the underworld. Another name for Hades is Pluto. It is very possible that Blackbeard works for this ancient weapon and that with the powers he has acquired, specifically with the quake-quake fruit, he intends to break the walls of Wano and finally release Pluton. He is, afterall, not too far from Wano at this very moment. It is possible that Pluton has been behind all of Blackbeards motives and actions.
Not only that, but Hades, the guardian of the underworld, is in a way the devil himself. I also think that not only is Pluton a person as well as a ship, but he is the original creator of the devil fruits. This might be one way to explain Blackbeards intimate knowledge of so many devil fruits including where to find them. Now, among the celestial bodies of our solar system that I listed, two were not accounted for. That was Earth and the Sun. I think the Sun is obvious to find. Joyboy. Nika the sun god. But then we have Imu, this new character who seems to be the head of it all. Umi, or Imu backwards, in Japanese means “the sea”. The whole world of One Piece is covered in the sea. So Imu could perhaps be our very own home planet, or at least some kind of embodiment of it. Now, if all of these Elder, these god like beings have some kind of dominion over different aspects of the world, then here is the conclusion to my theory.
Pluton and Imu at some point got into a big fight, likely over the creation of devil fruits. Imu took Plutons spirit and sealed him away in this world ending ship and then sunk him to the bottom of the sea, beneath Wano, putting up those walls to keep him there, and then declaring that all devil fruit users would be cursed by the sea, which he rules over.
Anyway, that's just some thoughts I had, but please help me fill in any things I might be missing and let me hear your ideas on all of this!

I (35F) want to leave my abusive husband (32M combat veteran) so badly but I don't know the best way to do it. I'm sorry this is so long but I'm begging for help, insight, any reassurance...
He says he used to have major anger issues but I never thought he would take them out on me. He has PTSD and a traumatic brain injury which makes his moods unpredictable.
I talked to his ex two days ago and she said he shoved her once, put his hands around her neck during a flashback, and also had a gun pointed at her during a flashback. He said they were engaged but she insisted they never were. She also said he was supposed to pick her up from the airport one time but he texted back saying he couldn't, because he wasn't sure if he was going to do something bad to her.
His abuse started when we moved in together while we were still engaged. I found out he had been on Onlyfans at the beginning of our relationship and just shortly before we got married... I was angry but I downplayed it and thought I could get over it. All it did was cause massive trust issues that have never healed and never will. He was subscribed to one of his exes and he also messaged one of the girls asking to meet just shortly after I stayed the week at his place for my birthday.
I spiraled mentally once the anger phase passed (severe depression and anxiety) and told him what I saw. He tried to deny it but when I said I knew his "pictures" he caved and said he wished I never told him and punched the headboard of our bed. He's my only source of comfort so I went to him countless times telling him I was still struggling with my trust issues and worried about whether he was still looking at other women, because he is subscribed to tons of women like that on Instagram and Tiktok. I started snooping looking for any evidence I could get so I could finally convince myself to leave him.
Everytime I confronted him about what I saw he made excuses and flew into a rage at me for snooping, screamed in my face, threw objects and furniture around (including our wedding rings and he broke my engagement ring in the process), punched walls, threatened divorce, demanded me to leave, or walked out without saying where he was going which made me call the police one time to look for him. I blamed myself because I was the one snooping and I told myself how would I feel if my partner constantly snooped on me? I blamed myself for everything and still kind of do. But he says it's his fault I'm like this and he just has to deal with the consequences.
Other times he says he has changed and it's my fault for getting in my head all the time, that my lack of trust is always so hard on him, and that my depression and anxiety are constantly dragging him down even though he says he's doing everything right to make me feel better. When I come to him to talk he usually sighs or treats it like a chore.
He says he beats himself up everyday for what he did and has apologized multiple times. But I never see any true regret. He told me "everybody else gets over their problems, why can't you?" He says he went through so much worse in the military than I have ever gone through and he got over his problems, so why can't I? That I need to "unfuck" myself and "everybody has depression."
One day when he came home I was feeling very low but he was in a bad mood already and he came at me, screaming that he's getting tired of me always being down and threatened divorce. I asked if he hated me and he looked at me and said in a really frightening way "if I hated you you'd be dead." That crushed me. Another time I got mad and said I was this way because of what he did to break my trust and he screamed at me multiple times to STFU, "waaah waaah waaaah you're always a Debbie downer" and threw in my face "you have no friends." He said he was done with the marriage but I talked him into staying because he has me so convinced the problem is me.
Other things... rough/forceful/demeaning sex... always saying "fuck you baby" in a cutesy way as a way to interact when we're doing our own things separately... slamming a controller down on my knee accidentally because he flew into a rage over losing a game... continuing to yell and saying he wasn't allowed to express anger even when I said it was scaring me... telling me once "I don't THINK I'd ever hurt you" (physically)... almost never helping with house chores and shopping... using me for money even though he makes more than I do with his disability payments... insulting my mother who helps us financially... trying to kick my cat one night when he couldn't sleep.
He's always so mean and critical of complete strangers when we go out and he acts like a macho narcissist who has everything figured out and he knows the right way about everything, like someone who is super opinionated to an obnoxious extent.
There's more but this is the worst of it all.
I read Lundy Bancroft's book asking myself if he's really that bad because 90% of the time he's good and loving. I know what I'm involved in and I know how much I've trauma bonded with him. But I've reached the point where I wake up every day in panic and despair knowing I'm still here and I want to get out. I already tried to leave before with a go bag and my cat but he talked me back. Some days I still try to convince myself the good times are worth staying for because I'm exhausted and I just want a good day for once. I've been miserable for months but I'm a pressure cooker now just waiting to blow. I'm falling apart.
I know I'm going to talk to a divorce lawyer and at least see if I have a case to have him evicted through a PFA. In that case he would be moving back in with his dad but he'd be close by. I could get the locks changed but I wouldn't put it past him to stalk me and try to hurt me (PFA or not -- he is suicidal anyway and has a lot of contempt for laws and the police), vandalize my car, or try to break into the apartment to hurt me or my cat. I don't even know if I would still be happy here where all these bad memories happened. And I wouldn't feel safe for myself or my cat everytime if I left the apartment.
The only other option is moving back in with my alcoholic narcissistic mother (my abusive alcoholic scizophrenic brother lives with her too) who doesn't know how to provide emotional support and hasn't been supportive at all throughout this marriage except financially. I would have to live in her garage, trust her not to let my cat loose if I go out, and make multiple trips back to my abusive husband still in the apartment to get all my belongings and furniture. He doesn't work, he's on school break now for summer so he's always here. I know I can get a police escort but they're not going to wait around for me to pack up the entire place. Almost everything is mine.
My husband might even just volunteer to leave and move back in with his dad like he has done before. I might not even need a PFA. I'm more afraid he'll try to hurt me if I actually get one versus if he just left by himself. I also don't know if he would offer to leave then just try to come back and hurt me before I could get the locks changed. The landlords constantly ignore the residents so I'd have to wait days or weeks for a lock change. Our lease ends next March.
I don't know what to do. All I want is to be by myself again with my cat in a safe place and it seems like no place and no escape plan I can come up with is entirely safe or secure. I'm at a loss but I can't keep living like this.

I'm on my 3rd case of burn out working for another IT provider. After another weekend of worrying about things beyond my control, losing sleep about tickets, something finally hit me. I'm making peanuts, stressing out about these little issues that really don't matter in the grand scheme of things while the company owner (my boss) drives a 7 series and owns a beach front vacation property. I've been spending so much time worrying about getting fired for lack of performance and it leads me to work harder; desperately looking for solutions to problems that I should be escalating to others with a higher pay grade. If nobody answers my emails and the solution gets delayed, the customer gets upset...who cares ? I've been in this industry 10 miserable years and despite how hard I work, how many big problems I solve on my own, nothing ever comes of it other than a "great job to so-and-so!" company wide e-mail. Now I'm suddenly realizing that I don't want to seek recognition or a pat on the back. I want to do the bare minimum, collect a check and look for something better. During my previous burnouts, I would spend days planning out in my head a plan to quit or "just keep doing my best and apply for something better." but that always lead me to continue killing myself with stress over tickets and not putting enough time into studying/labbing and sprucing up my resume properly for a truly better, higher paying position.
I don't know why it's taken me so long to realize it but everyone here was right, it really is just a matter of perspective. Quiet quitting isn't a shameful, lazy approach. It's 100% absolutely necessary in this economy and work culture. Doing the bare minimum and letting go of any fear of being fired over lack of performance, while putting your energy into developing yourself, keeping yourself healthy and interviewing for different jobs IS THE WAY TO GO. I feel so foolish letting myself get worked up into this state of burn out again when it's totally unnecessary.
I'm no longer afraid of the confrontation about performance. I'm gonna hit em with that "I'm sorry you feel that way but I'm trying my best" until I either line up something better or they fire me so I can collect that sweet, sweet unemployment and take my time to regroup and find a job that doesn't make me want to throw my laptop out the window. There's no shame anymore and there was never any reason to feel any shame. I've worked hard for peanuts my whole life, now it's time to put in the level of work this pay deserves. I used to think this sub was full of lazy shitters but I now realize how wrong I've been.

There's a bad joke in Gnosis, it goes like this: "How do you know if the fox in front of you is a vulp?" The responder asks how, and the punchline is "Ask them. If they say yes, they're a vulp. If they say no, they're a sarcastic vulp.". It's a dumb joke, but there's a kernel of truth to it: Looking at a vulp that is currently quadrupedal, nude and silent, one would need to inspect their paws to tell they're not an ordinary fox. The reason it's allegedly funny is all three of those are rarities on account of them being people and it's so unlikely you're ever going to be confused that there's supposedly humor in suggesting the hypothetical. (You'll note the words "allegedly" and "supposedly".) Nevertheless, there's a good reason these fox-people look so much like a real fox, and it's because they are a real fox. Let me explain.
This setting's Precursors (if the name didn't tip you off they're so long gone we don't know what they called themselves) felt the need to add "native" sophonts to every one of the four planets and nine moons they terraformed in this one star system, the inner worlds all got multiple, working with samples from some little blue backwater that forgot they were ever there and what little life was on each world to begin with just like they did for the rest of the ecosystem. In this case they literally just took red fox embryos from the aforementioned backwater planet, altered their genes to modify their anatomy and brains in particular so they could fill that role. Their hips are altered to support bipedal locomotion but don't look different externally when quadrupedal and the biggest visible change was moving their tiny fifth digit on their forelimbs closer to the other toes (or I guess "fingers" now), elongating and turning it so it functions as an opposable thumb. Altering existing or extinct animals was how they made all their artificial sophonts, even the really weird ones like the dragons or those things from Lum with eleven heads, but by this point in the timeline they got lazy. They were already on worlds 6-13, they had to light up a brown dwarf as an artificial undersized star to make even eight out of its over two hundred moons habitable. All the creativity by this point in the project was going into "how", not "what" and the biology team was running low on ideas, so they didn't make any extraneous changes like they normally would. Fox, smart brain, paw hands, tweaked hips, boom, fox-person, done. Moon-planet of the fox-people, slap it on a plastic lunch box and get the spy drones set up so the tourists can covertly watch the fox tribes build their brand new fox civilization and fox culture until they have fox cities with fox art and fox fasion and form fox countries with fox governments and intercontinental fox trade networks that fight fox wars motivated entirely by the greed of individual foxes but presented to the poor foxes fighting them as moral crusades in the name of their fox gods and fox nations to preserve their fox values, fox traditions, fox beliefs and way of fox life.
My question is: What do you think of this approach to animal people? What do you think of them looking so much like the existing animal that you have to rely on them doing people things or detailed knowledge of their anatomy to tell they're not the regular animal they're based on?
Or, more bluntly, I think they're lazy and they're supposed to be lazy but are they too lazy or am I good?

So, you said Lord Nicholas has no personality, which is true lol, but since I'm the devil's advocate, I took that as a challenge. Make yourself comfortable for a long read. Have some popcorn.
Why is this guy more of a tragic character, rather than a villain? And how does a man lose identity, and becomes a monster through desperation? I'll answer this for you below.
• Throughout Plague Tale Innocence, there are various signs that although he is personally close to Vitalis (no use of titles or formalities when speaking to each other) he is the execution, and not the mastermind behind the plans. For example, when Hugo's Macula was to be tested, he urged Vitalis on to put an end to the plague already, they are not here to play games.
• In the very same chapter, we get a little insight on what he believes and thinks about the conflict between the Inquisition and the De Runes. He doesn't understand why Beatrice De Rune resists their persuasion for information regarding the Macula, since their goals are shared -> ending the Plague. Ultimately, he blindly believes Vitalis wants to control the Plague to save them. And he does anything, ANYTHING to make that happen.
Commit genocide against peasants, and in the end, even go as far as killing Hugo.
Now, let's take a little turn to make a background check for this guy. Or at least what is hinted, and what can be assumed with intuition and theories.
• Like I mentioned before, him and Vitalis are personally close, and in the preultimate chapter of Plague Tale: Innocence, after his death, guards talk about him in the city. They are confused why Vitalis hasn't sent anyone for his search (I'll get to that one later), since he was his Protégé. This alone in itself wouldn't mean anything, but right after that a guard added "Maybe he found himself another Protégé" regarding Hugo of course.
Since this game is about innocence and children, it's almost safe to assume that Nicholas likely got taken under Vitalis' wings just as Hugo was now in the present. That would explain why they are close, and why Nicholas blindly trusts his master. Another dialogue backs this up, between the Arch Bishop and Vitalis. "Puppets like you will kneel and beg me to save them." and look who appears and kneels right there and then? Lord Nicholas. This is my theory, I can back it up but it isn't 100% surely true of course. Take it with a pinch of salt please.
• Now, time to get to why Vitalis didn't send anyone after Nicholas' disappearance... We saw nothing of the two months Hugo spent in the Bastion, but based on the Cathedral's state, it's safe to assume things didn't go that well with controlling the Macula. The plan was to get Hugo through the threshold finally, so that the Conjuration can begin. (Note to self: another essay later about that one). Although they tried to push Hugo through with hurting his mother, it didn't work. Because of this, Vitalis tasked Nicholas with taking Hugo to his sister, to end her life. This is simple, but it doesn't stop here.
In the chapter Blood Ties (where we control Hugo), we already meet an impatient Nicholas who wants to put an end to the Plague. Not only that, but let me get to one crucial sentence told by Vitalis. "Nicholas... You cannot understand." This hints at the disagreements between the two, and that Nicholas is not indulged in how this should be done. Nicholas tries to help Vitalis up, but he rejects the help too. It's quite symbolic for the one-sided trust between the two. Due to this growing mistrust, and how Vitalis didn't expect Nicholas to come back after his mission later on, to me it seems like Vitalis cut the ties and sent him exactly to his death to get rid of him.
• Vitalis' plan was never to get rid of Hugo once they pass the threshold ("I have a lot to teach the Carrier, and his friends."), and knew well, that Nicholas has no chance against Hugo and Amicia with the rats alongside them. He sent the man who trusted him the most to his death, and with that also chose his ultimate protégé - Hugo. It's also likely that Nicholas' mistrust grew because his position in the hierarchy was compromised, since it's likely Vitalis got obsessed with Hugo, and Nicholas almost realized he is played with. There is also the idea, that Vitalis sent him away to actually save him from the white rats he meant to send on the crowd anyway. Anyway, Vitalis is for another essay...
• The betrayed, the sacrificed. Who is he? There is absolutely little we know of him, except for his title and occupation. What always speaks in Plague Tale: Innocence though, is the design. I mean look at that drip- sorry.. In "A Making of Plague Tale: Innocence" the creative developers mention the importance of faces, and overall pure, intuitive impressions we get of our characters.
• There is only one character whose face we never see, and that is Nicholas. That doesn't only play as a psychological trick to make him more terrifying, but also hints at certain points. First of all, his robes are Dominican. This is historically fitting (although there were no dominican knights) since Dominicans were those entrusted by the Church to handle trials against heresy and begin inquisitions. This also hints that he is very religious and dedicated to serving the (assumed) good. I know, no way. Let's not forget about how faded out it is, or bloody. In NO way he is a good guy, but a tragic believer? Likely. Under the robes is the armour, which is hit all around. It's no news we talk about a very experienced and efficient knight who also happens to be serving Vitalis (NOT the Church! Explained in another essay, chill.). Knights start their training at 7, and only nobles are in for the job, obviously. I made the connection, that since he likely knows Vitalis from his childhood, and his training also began when he was 7 years old, and his name was Nicholas...
Side note: In medieval times, children were named after Saints to inwoke their blessing, in this case, among many things, protecting children.
It's likely that he himself, just like those he hunts, was an orphan, perhaps even a sinner, who had to be saved by none else, than Vitalis. Give it a thought, maybe he was a lost little boy like Hugo, whose innocence was stolen way too early. With how Plague Tale likes to play with irony and parallels between characters, I don't see this as unlikely.
• All in all, he is what his occupation is, and nothing human. He is the machine that serves. The cross, the judgement. We cannot see his face, because he has no identity except what Vitalis gave him. His role, his title, his mission (perhaps even name). As it can be seen, Hugo too, was dressed in robes showing the Inquisition's sign, like a mark of ownership over him.
• From the very start of the story, he was the representative of that time's barbaric cruelty, unforgiving, misplaced judgement. And as though from the children's perspective he was a monster from the very beginning, how did it go down? As I said before, he has no identity except his committment, and through that his morals, ambitions are shown. At the very start, they ambushed the De Rune estate, and we CANNOT know, if the violance was planned beforehand or it came due to Robert's resistance.
People were taken hostage for questioning, the goal was to capture Hugo, the Carrier, and Beatrice, the only one who can help them understand the plague's origins. It was bloody, but after this chapter, you can hear guards clearly say "capture children" and not just Hugo. Now, unbelivably, I don't think he wanted Amicia bad at the start. They confront each other in the English camp for the second time (where he paid a ransom for both of them), where he tries to negotiate with her to give them Hugo and stop running. Later his methods change, telling the plain truth that there is nowehere for her to go out there (These methods of convincing show a lot of personality and insight especially in the boss fight).
Later on, it's mentioned Vitalis is going hard on him but "he is used to it". Again, their shared history is hinted. The hunt for Hugo is fruitless still, and the plague is spreading day-by-day.
Next we hear from him, is in the chapter where we visit the city with Amicia. Or rather, that he is not exactly participating in the mission killing the sick. Since him and Vitalis disagree with methods of solving the Plague, and he is occupied with catching Hugo, there is a possibility this order of slaughter was carried out without his consent. Though, this is a high take and it would be totally in character to do such a task in the means of self-preservation.
Amicia's visions of him from Penance is not reliable, but at the very same time she clearly dreamed what happened and it's likely she mixed reality with hallucinations from exhaust. If, the hallucinations were true, that means Hugo did hear Amicia, but Nicholas directly diverted his attention from her and led him away.
It's hard to speculate if he did this to let nature do its work, or to actually show mercy, which is equally possible, since it was clear from the beginning that even though she killed his men, he knew she is simply running and kills as a means to survive.
Now, as I explained earlier, many things go down when Hugo resides in the Bastion, and we can only guess what that causes. I mentioned Nicholas' growing distrust, now let me introduce you to the psychological denial he experiences during the boss fight, along with his reflections pointing at the children. The man, becoming the monster. The fire (another essay since fire in Plague Tale is symbolic) causing him to destroy himself.
In the chapter Remembrance he goes to the Château d'Ombrage along Hugo, to ensure the boy passes the threshold with killing his sister, with this enabling Vitalis to pass as well. At first, Nicholas is quite calm and confident, sending Hugo to kill her "Go, and do what has to be done.". Interestingly, despite this, he still has his sword prepared, which shows he still doesn't trust Hugo. Later on, he knocks Arthur out, but doesn't kill him senselessly, despite the fiasco at the English camp. He takes Amicia to Hugo, and now threatens him to kill her, or else he kills his mother in front of him. After that, he tells him, if Hugo does as he tells him so, maybe Vitalis keeps him by his side.
This could hint that only by accomplishments such as this, and proving devotion, can one remain important in Vitalis' eyes. Also, that maybe, Nicholas had to go through something similar, "She means nothing to you now".
Doubts and frantic impatience take hold, which ultimately lead him to take matters into his own hands. He decides to kill her, himself. As he pushes Hugo away, she calls him a bastard, which he then turns back at her, to question her morality and self-righteousness. She betrayed him, that is why he gave himself up. It can be perhaps far-fetched, but this also can count as self-reflection already. Betrayal -> causing giving up, which happens later to him too.
After Arthur "takes care of him" (not exactly...) and the siblings reunite, Nicholas wakes up and this time, immediately kills Arthur. The death is not just a shock value as many believe, it also shows the already progressing monster stepping forth, and losing humanity entirely.
The boss fight has three phases. His methods at provoking the children, and self-reflect change and become way more intense with time.
In the first phase, he tries to separate them and tells Amicia that he knows it must be difficult to live in the Carrier's shadow. Also, that they are terrified. He is poking at her most vulnerable place, their biggest fear, which's "face" is ultimately him. Also, reminding Amicia of her biggest desire, that is to be acknowledged by her parents. Especially this can count as self-reflective, since as I said earlier Nicholas likely noticed Hugo is slowly replacing him in Vitalis' eyes. The wish to excell, and be acknowledged for the devotion is a deep scar this character could carry. He also reminds them of how their father died, to remind them of honour, which Nicholas obviously has a twisted sense of.
In the second phase, his first voice line shows surprise and fear, and anger in response to those feelings. He is more reckless and aggressive too. Here, again, he manipulatively reminds them how little they can do, and threatens them. This is both calculated and instinctual, since he says such things to bring the children out of their hiding places, but at the very same time also because he is slowly losing himself. There are also lines which can be reflective to his beliefs and assumptions based on himself, such as: "Your sister won't be able to save you child.... You are alone." There were already connections made between how Vitalis saved him, and if one puts it all together, this line shows how he doesn't believe in the siblings' bond, because his own bond with Vitalis broke, and Nicholas is (alike to Hugo) alone. Or there is also the line "What do you think you can do? You are nothing. [...]" I wanted to highlight this line because Plague Tale (among many other things) is about the helplessness one faces trying to protect loved ones, and/or trying to rewrite their fates. The fact that Nicholas dehumanizes them entirely, shows he knows the fact one, them or him, cannot change the course that has been set, but he is still in denial trying to fight it (a lot like Amicia in Requiem, by the way. Also, fire (this is why that needs another essay....).
In the third phase, he becomes uncharacteristically reckless and desperate, where he succumbs to the wrath and, his fate. "Come to me, come into my arms my dear children." His sanity decreases and he knows death is unavoidable. The question left is whenever he can bring them down with himself or fails. And failure, is unacceptable. He is better dead, than failed. "I will teach you the meaning of sacrifice" this line shows that likely, he accepted his last quest knowing well he is going to die probably. That he rather burns himself, bring hell, than letting go. He keeps shouting the motto of his order, because that is the only thing that he clings to. It's pathetic and forced, inhumane. "[...] We'll die together" <-> "I will boil your blood until it spurts from your eyes", "You are going to pay, [...]" by this time, he keeps switching tactics at approaching and luring them out, frantic and monstrous. His words mean nothing by this time and desperation takes hold. What line of him is the purest, rawest, and most honest, between all the threads and claims, self-convincing attempts to maintain devoted is this: "The pain... To feel oneself alive... And deliver death." This line might seem like one among the many terrible threats, but it in fact shows his deepest belief. That is, of pain and life. Sacrifice and death. That those who live, have to kill, and that is what it means to exist in this world.
• In Plague Tale Innocence and Requiem, we see Amicia's development into a murderer who follows similarly blind committments.
She ultimately becomes, what she condemned, and what caused her great misery. What, in the end, she herself becomes if Hugo doesn't lead her on the right path. A monster.
So, to sum it all up, Lord Nicholas represents the human being of that time, whose identity is what he serves, and nothing else.
It makes one selfless, righteous, but at what cost? Violence spreads from one person to another, while everyone tries to save what is precious to them. Hope this helped seeing him as more human and with more personality. Cheers. A few more points I couldn't exactly integrate are the following:
• A few things showing the underlying morality and plain intentions: at first he tried to negotiate with both Robert, Amicia, and Beatrice as well. He condones stealing entirely. He doesn't kill Arthur at first.
• In the concept art he is left handed. In Middle Ages, left handed people were considered sinful, since it was the "devil's hand". This added with the self-punishing- self-destructive-Catholic mindset, added with his devotion, signs that he is penitent, and does what he should for a greater good, a salvation, and carries the burden of "sacrifice".

I am neha ( 26 f ) , I am here to vent and get some suggestions or maybe even a real friend . This is a story of how I ruined my love life and destroyed the man who meant everything to me . We grew up in Coimbatore , i first met my boyfriend when I was in 11th grade , I actually saw him in a video , it was a Facebook video made by his friends , one of his friend proposed a girl , so they made a video of it , he was there in it too . He is tall , above 6ft , he looked ok , normal , a bit weird too with his specs and curl hair . He didn’t stand out , after few days I saw in a local chat place , he was with his friend , all sweaty , they came from gym . I recognised him immediately though. I saw him sneakily , idk why , after going home I sent him a request to his Insta . We started talking the same night , he said he saw me too , we connected way too fast , he was very funny and practical, we became best friends very soon , we almost spoke daily , in that following year we became so close, there wasn’t anything sexual , we just talk about our day and our lives daily , then he got into a relationship with a girl , I liked her too , life was so easy and fun back then , after we got into college , I Started to date a guy in my college , but we didn’t stop talking , nothing changed between us , after going to college we started getting drunk and smoking up , it was all new and we all did it almost everyday in first year , it was pretty fun . The guy I was with that time , didn’t really smoke up that much , he got drunk but he didn’t smoke pot that much , but the rest of us gathered everyday to smoke pot and play carrom . We both even meet at night to just smoke up and listen to music . At the end of the first year , one day he called me one evening and told me that he wanted to meet me , he sounded very low , I was with my my boyfriend and his friends that time but I left there immediately,booked an auto and Met him at a usual place near an IT park , we drink coffee and smoke cigarettes there usually.he was already there when I went in , he saw me and smiled but that looked very sad , he told me that his girlfriend kissed someone , a distant cousin of her actually , she kissed him in a moment and texted her girlfriend about it , she mentioned that she regrets it very much , I can’t stand it , I don’t know what to do , I feel nauseous, stuff like that . He showed the screenshots , he didn’t talk much he just smiled but that killed me . I was so angry on her , I didn’t even know what to do to make him feel better at that moment, I said she is not worth it , don’t worry , things like that . He didn’t talk about it after that , he changed the topic and he just sat there for 30-40 mins just smoking thinking about something. We speak almost daily and I know everything about him , he told me when they first had sex , we speak about everything, just not anything sexual to each other , when I saw him like this , I was feeling only rage , I was so angry on her , I don’t understand why she kissed some other guy , after getting into that relationship he was very loyal , I know how loyal he was , he even got a tattoo of her initials , but when he knew about this kiss , it made him so sad I guess . After 2 hours , we went home . I called her as soon as I went home , i scolded her so much , she started crying and told me that it was a mistake, she sounded very regretful too , she cried so much , I couldn’t bring myself to be mean after that .but that night i couldn’t sleep , my ex called me all night but I didn’t pick his call , I kept texting him , we used to text in Snapchat daily , I kept sending him texts and he texted me back to , he said he is going to get drunk and pass out , I also felt that’s better , after some days she even cut her hand , like scratches with knife on wrists , she was very regretful too , then somehow they didn’t break up , he wanted to after that but she didn’t let him , but gradually it got ok , but after this we started to speak and meet more frequently than before , I started to drop him in my college , both of our colleges are in same road , we started going in one vehicle daily. Mostly I drove , we speak all the time about nothing , even when we were going on my scooty , we just make fun of people in road , we laughed , had fun . One day he even pressed my breasts accidentally, side of my breast . I started neglecting my ex , that guy I dated that time , after few months , people started to notice , but still we didn’t care . (I actually come off from a well doing family , my family has enough money but my parents have a very unsuccessful marriage, they don’t even speak to each other , I have a younger sister and elder sister . My elder sister is married , my younger sister difference is 3 years . My parents doesn’t speak to each other , my mom openly says that they are together only for the kids . ) I loved being with him , he made me feel safe , comfortable and it’s always warm when I’m with him . We smoked pot all the time though , it was so fun , we even bunked college went to room and just smoked pot and watched anime all day . One day my ex boyfriend and his friends were in Ooty and they wanted me to come , I said I’ll come with him , I can’t come alone , and I asked him to come . We rolled some joints and started to go in his bike , we went a beautiful ride , stopped and smoked up in between, after we reached there I went with my ex boyfriend. We all smoked up that night got drunk , he usually doesn’t talk that much , but all of us were drunk and it was chill , some of my friends like him some don’t , but it’s all chill . We stayed in a tent stay there , that night I was with my ex , he wanted to make out , we kissed and did some stuff but I just felt restless and distracted, I kept thinking about him and my ex was a drunk too , it didn’t turn me on , after some time he passed out . I went out and went to his tent to see him if he is asleep , but he wasn’t there , then I started to look for him and I found him near the fire place , he was smoking up there alone with a phone in his hand , he was just singing this song 7 years by Lucas I think , he was singing along with a joint in his hand , he saw me coming , smiled but he didn’t stop singing, I can see him feeling even little embarrassed, but he looked so happy and free . I sat down there started to smoke up with him . After sometime I asked him why haven’t even kissed even once , I just asked him in a fun way but he got all serious all of a sudden , he saw me straight in the eyes and told me that he would love to kiss me , I literally felt butterflies in my lower tummy , my hips felt all tight too , idk , I still remember everything though . I kissed him in an instant, I kinda rushed in and kissed him, it felt magical . We kissed for a long time , we just kissed , nothing else . But I loved it , after sometime we separated, he saw me smiled and said I tasted sweet and bitter with weed taste . But my heart was beating so fast that time , I wanted to make out with him right there , I’ve felt horny before but he was the only guy made me feel like this , I tried to kiss him again but he stopped me and told me im drunk and asked me to go sleep . Next morning they asked me to go with them but my mind was fully on that kiss , I came back to cbe in his bike , we didn’t talk anything for the first time I just hugged him on the way back , it was nice too . I thought about plans to break up with my ex , after he dropped me home I kept thinking about the kiss , things got normal after a few days , we were like before but we started to flirt a bit , I started to call him baby and it gradually became very intimate . One day in a movie I kissed him again and he kissed me back too , we started making out bit by bit , it developed into a place where he started to grope me while im driving , I enjoyed every bit of that , I broke up with that guy I was with but he was still with that girl . Around final year first semester end they broke up too . We had intercourse the next day , it was amazing , I loved everything about him and the best thing is he is my best friend too . We rented a place for us by college end , we had sex every single day , it was the best , I loved staying with him . After this there was covid and we had to stay in our place , for one whole year I lived with him happily, he never let me down even once , he was already very caring from beginning but after we got committed , he really did treated me like a princess . He didn’t speak much but his actions were most considerate , we both worked remotely and having the time of our life , two years went by , I was happy and fullfilled , at the end of third year he quit his job and tried to get a different better job with extra good pay , 3 months passed by , one day few friends of mine from my work visited our place , they told me about opportunity to work in chennai for a month , I took it and went to chennai for a month , he dropped me to bus and sent me off to chennai . We spoke daily but not that much , I went out with my friends daily got drunk , just having fun . Some of my friends think my boyfriend is beneath me , one even said that I deserve better , she said he didn’t even get a job in three months joked and asked me whether I am the one who’s paying rent , actually he never asked me rent or money , he always paid for everything , but that time when they were joking I didn’t defend him , I still couldn’t believe that I didn’t say anything . In that week I met a guy , he came with my friends , he flirted with me when I was there , after I went back to PG I got a text from this guy , he got my number from my friends it seems . After some texts I responded and we started texting ,i liked the attention I think idk , I was talking to my boyfriend daily too , but somehow he noticed that I am not ok , he asked me about it and I said it was work issue and I am tired , 3^rd weekend I met that guy alone , he wanted to have a drink and I went , I slept with him that night , to be honest the sex wasn’t good , when he got inside me I felt darkness , I swear . Idk why I did it , after sex that guy slept in a second , I saw him lying down and I felt like killing myself , I left to my pg in midnight , I booked a cab and went back . I saw my snap notifications from him but I couldn’t open it , I blocked that guy’s number , I went to pg , cried myself to sleep . Next morning I spoke to my boyfriend , told him that I got cold and resting today , he told me that he got a job as a business manager for a US IT firm , he sounded so happy and told me that he called yesterday night to tell me this . I was crying so hard when he was on the phone , at that moment I swear I even fogot the face of that I slept with , he asked me to get rest and I hung up . I couldn’t talk to him , I felt so guilty and ashamed , as I was thinking this I get a notification my swiggy that he placed order to my pg , he bought soup . I broke down , it was like everything is telling me how big mistake I made , suddenly my thought went to that day he told me about his ex’s kiss , I can see that sad smile . I decided not to tell him and love him more and more , he had his birthday in 15 days I wanted to do something for him . When I came back from chennai , he picked me , he was so happy to see me , he spoke about his new job to me on the way , he was like a child , maybe cause he missed me for a month , I can see that he is so happy like silly child just to see me , after going home I had sex with him , I even rimmed him and I kinda liked it , it was the best sex we had , I felt alive and also very guilty . I treated him better and better to ease my guilt , but this made him very happy , I arranged a small party with my sister ,his friends and my mom .the day before his birthday we got drunk he asked me why I am not being adamant like before , ‘enna kadhal ha ‘ (joking sayin I am so in love) he joked about how afetr five years we can get super rich and start a family , I melted hearing all this .i promised myself that I will never let him down . but ha ha This is why I think karma is a bitch , at the noon of his birthday I got a text from that guy saying that he is thinking about that night . He heard the notification took the phone to pass it to me , he just saw the phone simply , just a glance and he just stopped and opened the text , I was blowing up balloons opposite of him , I saw his face and my heart sank , he came closer and gave me the phone , he didn’t speak anything , I opened my phone in a panic , saw the text and I saw him , he asked me ‘ so you slept with some guy ? ‘ , I didn’t reply , my whole mind got blank , I felt like I was gonna faint , he just saw me and said why . Of all these years I knew him I never saw him cry , but now his voice was shaking , he just asked me ‘ yen ‘ (why in tamil) . I saw tears on his eyes , I can see his eyes becoming lifeless in a matter of minutes , I tried to hug him but he just moved away , no matter how much we fight , when I hug him , he gets all cute and lovely , but he just moved away in an instinct . He then came forward hugged me tightly , he said ‘ sorry ‘ . I still don’t know why he said sorry , but that sounded so weak to me , he is my everything and I hurt him , I know everything about him and I still fucked up . He hugged me for some more time , I knew this warmth might be the last thing . After few mins , he rubbed his eyes in my dress , saw me smiled the same way . But it felt more like he is laughing at himself , I watched my 6 ft man walking out of the room , I just stood there alone , and I felt very cold , I remember that cold everyday , evening people came for the party and he got ready and cut the cake , fed me the first piece , my mom and sister was there too , he behaved very good , spoke with my family , but I can see that he is broke , but he still made it through the night , I went to speak with him that night , but he said he can’t . he said ‘ please I can’t ‘ . I choked hearing his voice , he went to terrace , I didn’t sleep at all that night , I walked around our little one bhk apartment , I smoked two packs of cigs that night , I went to check on him in the terrace by 4 , he was sleeping there on the floor , he hugs himself in sleep and its so cold , I cried watching him , just one day ago he was being silly like a kid talking about future family , now he is there alone , heartbroken . Morning usually he makes coffee and rolls one , I made coffee and rolled one , waited for him to come down . He came down saw me and smiled , but its not the cheerful smile , it just hurt so bad watching him like that , he drank the coffee , smoked up with me , even told me its good. Then he got ready , I cooked but he said he can’t eat , he is not hungry , that morning was so silent , he cheers up with he sees me , he was my biggest fan , now he left home with just saying bye . I got a text from him that aftrn asking me to move back to my mom’s if possible , I was dead . I couldn’t say no , I hurt him , he didn’t even scold me , he even requested me , I can only say yes . I asked him that I want to stay one more night , he said ok like always . That night I asked him to cuddle with me , he said ok , he wanted that too it seems , we just hugged in silent , he slept off quickly , he always told me that when I sleep with him it makes him stressfree and he gets a good night sleep . He was asleep on my breasts , I saw him sleeping and I couldn’t stop my tears , realising that this is the last time , I made a stupid mistake , but everything felt unimportant now , I saw him sleeping and I kissed him on his cheek , must have whispered sorry a 100 times , our four years relationship came through my mind , I realize that he made sure I was happy in every way he knew , I proposed him , I made him fall for me , now I broke his heart . I didb’t sleep that night too , morning I dozed off , when I woke up he wasn’t there, he made juice for me and left for work . I packed some of my stuff and went to my mom’s . when I stepped out of our little home , I broke down and cried . I went home and cried , I told my mom we fought , but my sister knew something was up , she tried to ask him but he said it was a small fight , I confessed to her that night , I still remember seeing her confused look , she is a gen z kid , but even she gave me a look of confusion , she didn’t understand how I could do that , she liked my boyfriend very much , she was almost proud of him . But when she knew I cheated on him , she felt disgusted I think . Our sister bind kind of broke too that night . My life was dull , I missed him every second , I missed talking to him , I missed his smell , everything . I just focused on work , two months went by with no contact . I saw him near IT park at our spot one day, he looked like he was sick , he lost weight , his eyes are dry , he looked so pale . I saw him from a distance and I couldn’t believe my eyes , my baby looked so weak and sick , he was having a coffe and smoking a cig alone at the place we used to sit . My eyes teared up watching him , he looked so lonely . None of my friends knew we broke up because I cheated , he specifically asked me not to say anything to anyone . I didn’t speak to him that day , I couldn’t . I was full with guilt . After going home I called his friends and asked how he was and they said that they lost all contact with him and he is ghosting everybody . I broke him and also made him alone , I seriously considered killing myself but I was a coward . After a month , when I was in office , my mom got a diabities issue and fainted , my sister called him in a hurry , he came immediatiely and admitted mom in hospital , when I came there I saw him with a plastic cover with insulins for my mom . After my elder siter came , he left , he asked me to call with updates . Before leaving he asked me why I cheated , he said “ is it because I am not satisfying you “ or “ you wanted a emotial support “. when he said that , I just stood there , I can see his face , hiding a humiliation , I never had a sex issue with him , I loved being with him , but my baby asked me this , I felt ashamed . I couldn’t face him , I just stood there , he said never mind and left . I stood there seeing him leave ,but I didn’t give up , I started texting and snapping so much and somehow I made him talk to me normally , but his eyes has lost its color, he looks like he is tired of everything . After few days we both got drunk and alone , I kissed him as soon as I got the chance , he kissed me back too , usually when he kisses , he hold me ears , looks me in the eyes and kiss me , he did the same out of the habit , as soon as our eyes locked , he bursted out in tears , I truly felt how much this man loved me and how much I hurt him , he wanted to do more but he stopped himself , when he burst into tears, my heart completely broke , I hate myself so much , I hate my friends for fucking up my mind , I hate that guy . My man is gettting punished for giving everything to me , its been a year , he changed , he looks lean , unhealthy , I even think his hair is falling , almost like a zombie . I would glady kill myself for him , I just want him to be happy , I destroyed the only person I love , I see how devastating this can get for him, he looks so weak , I can’r accept it . I should’ve defended him when they joked about him . Its all my fault , its been a year and I still can;t go back to him , I can’t imagine another guy to raise my kids , I want him . Help me .

“i cant do it anymore” “i really want to k@ll myself rn” “why is it so hard, i hate the fucking ib”
As an M24 student, the biggest observation that constantly came to my mind over two years of interacting with the IB people is the amount of whining, nitpicking, grumbling and crying. People dramatize the experience of plain studying to the extent that looking at any IB-associated subreddit, one could think that IB is actually THAT hard. Unbelievably, impossibly, destructively, atrociously hard.
But is it?
Speaking from personal experience, no, it is fucking not. It is designed to be doable, and it is more than doable to get a 7 in every subject. It is more than doable to score 80+ on every test, and y’all know about it. If you spent 2-3 hours of your time after classes every day to do some productive work, you would ace the IB, and yes, it is doable with setting your priorities right.
The six courses? Math, bio, physics, chem, whatever is considered the hardest. Take time to reflect - was it that impossible? Was that topic that confusing? Was that test that hard? If you actually did the work you were expected to do, would this subject be that difficult?
IA’s and EE? If you worked over summer between Y1 and Y2 and actually got to apply some knowledge to explore something that is INTERESTING TO YOU, something that sparks your curiosity, would all that research work be that annoying?
CAS? No comments needed, anyone knows its bullshit and treating it like bullshit works perfectly.
Bad teachers? The amount of free IB materials of the highest quality in the internet is incredible. No other program has so many resources for literally every subject you can take. Tell your fellow IB alumni at unis about your bad teachers. They will enlighten you on the actual problems of having bad teachers.
Think about IB this way before trying to rationalise your inability to set the priorities right, and using the excuse of “the hardest high school program in the world” next time.
Y’all gotta admit the fact that if you tried not even hard enough, but just consistently enough, the lowest grade you would get for any test would be a 6. And y’all gotta admit that this whining comes from your personal choices that you had made over the two years of studying.
I am not a perfect student either, and I do have struggles. But I have never tried to use the ego defence mechanism of crying how hard IB is instead of putting effort to make it a productive experience. Seek knowledge instead of typing on reddit how much you would love to unalive yourself.
P.S ofc, this is for general IB population, I understand that there are cases like death of a close one, divorce etc that multiply the difficulty of anything. Those are valid excuses ,“IB IS HARD😭😭” is not.

I posted here a few months back asking for advice with making sure my nieces were safe when they moved to Chicago and my sister hid her address from everyone and wouldn’t let my nieces talk to any one of their family members for a while. A lot has happened since then and my sister filled the car up with things and left the state without telling anyone she was moving. Her kids and our grandmother thought she was visiting for a few weeks but it came out she was actually moving there which raised a lot of alarms for everyone. According to her she also did not inform her probation officer. She also informed us she was back with her abusive ex boyfriend who her daughters are terrified of and who she was dealing drugs for previously, and probably is again now. I will refer to him as D.
My uncle already called the Chicago probation and let them know my sister was in Pennsylvania probably without permission. She says she was called and told to come into the probation office next week (this Monday) and is now on her way back to Pennsylvania where she left the girls with our grandma while she went to get butt surgery done in New York over a week ago. In the meantime her oldest daughter has started to have breathing problems again, likely a combination of my sister smoking right next to them as well as anxiety. She was brought to the hospital a week ago because she was struggling to breathe and they would not take her until my sister comes back and brings her in.
When we try talking to my sister about how scared the girls are of D, she blows everyone off and threatens to remove the girls from our lives and says we shouldn’t be talking adult stuff to her kids. Mind you, no one is telling the kids things about D, the girls are talking to us about things that happen and why they are scared of him. When my youngest niece was in counselling her counselor informed me if D was still in their lives we may need to involves CPS. This is due to him kicking her out of the way when she tried to break up a fight between my sister, which is something she talked to our grandmother about around the time it actually happened as well. And her oldest would start flipping out crying and screaming when her little sister brought him up and would tell her not to even talk about him.
I am reaching out specifically because they were recently in the car together and D was slapping and hitting my sister while she was driving, causing her to swerve all over the road. My oldest niece tried calling 911 but hung up when D asked her what she was doing, and my youngest niece announced to the car and everyone after the incident that she was scared she was going to die. They also think a car was following them and called the police on them because they also visited D later (i believe) about this incident. This is not the first instance like this and I’m sure it will not be the last. My sister told them she wouldn’t bring him around anymore, then left for her cosmetic surgery, called them and informed them that he will be their new father.
I don’t give a shit what happens to my sister at this point is there anything I can do to ensure the safety of my nieces and keep them away from D? After all of this my family is saying there’s nothing we can do until she goes back to prison. Is this really the case is is there something we can do for them? Couldn’t CPS do anything to help? I am 2000 miles away but there’s also family in town with them who can help.

I have a remote position and have very kind anonymous feedback from people I assisted that I think speaks very well to me. Does anyone know how this is seen by ADCOMS? Has anyone done this? I would hope they understand we're all just trying to make a case for ourselves but I don't want it to be seen as egotistical..?

And I am not even talking about the akgaes of the other members.
Yes, they do exist too. I know that there were some who celebrated their bias getting more chance to showcase their skills while covering his lines and I knows there are government shippers who are happy that he can no longer interfere with those "moments" but honestly, I have to dig through the searches in order to find them. Maybe it's because I've utilized my mute and block function on them a long time ago hence why they don't even cross the "for you" section of my feed or maybe it's because Renjun is one of my biases in NCT Dream that's why his fans appear more on my timeline.
I get it. It's a tough time to be a Renjun stan. There were so many things about their recent comeback that I wish didn't happen. I wish people were kinder to him. I wish he didn't miss their concert because he worked hard for it. I wish he wasn't hurting because of things that aren't even his fault.
I get being sad. I get being angry. What I don't get is directing those emotions to the other members.
It was crazy. Jaemin got hated on for "lying" during a fansigning event, for telling a fan who asked him that Renjun caught a flu. This was before official announcement was made, and in that official announcement, SM cited poor health condition and symptoms of anxiety as the reason. It means, Jaemin may not be lying. He's just in a position where he can't talk about the other reason yet.
The days before the concert kicked off in Seoul were tough. People who are trying to go the rational routes were automatically harassed for "defending" SM. For example, when rumors of rerecording Renjun's A.R., when fans were citing Chenle and Haechan as example (they both missed a few cities during tour due to poor health condition), when people pointed out that the case is different because Chenle and Haechan had to be pulled out while the tour is already starting, thus no time to make adjustment, akgaes deemed it as "normalizing mistreatment towards Renjun". They said the same thing when people pointed out that others in SM (and even in some other companies) were excluded on the MD during their hiatus.
It reached a point where akgaes were already directing their frustrations towards the other members. "Why aren't they talking about him when they usually say 'we'll come back here as 7Dream' whenever someone misses their schedule". It wasn't true because the other members were talking about him, just not in the specific manner they wanted. When people pointed out it's easier to predict how long a flu will last and that "promising to comeback as seven" can be burdening to someone who had to take a break for issues relating to mental health, akgaes deemed it as ONLY being sympathetic towards the other members and not towards Renjun. Because for some reasons they believed it's mutually exclusive. Whatever. Anything that doesn't agree with their agenda of proving that the six members are erasing Renjun's existence in NCT Dream were treated as something that's antagonizes him. This "why aren't they talking about him", we'll get back to later as it reached an unfortunate development.
The concert in Seoul finally happens. People can still hear his voice in the AR and it's very noticeable whenever members were late covering his parts. While there's also a possibility that the rumor of rerecording was true, it's obvious that they didn't rerecord every single part. For those not following NCT Dream, they have this song called ANL (All Night Long) which they've already performed during their previous tours. In The Dream Show 2, during the bridge which is Renjun's part, the other members would sit around him as he sings his part. Now for The Dream Show 3, instead of having anyone cover that part, they decided to play his AR, yellow planet was shown on the screen during this time, yellow butterfies (confettis) rained down, and the colors of the lightstick turned yellow. Yellow is Renjun's favorite color.
Haechan dedicated part of his ending ment towards Renjun, how Renjun practiced until the very end because he really wanted to be there but unfortunately couldn't because he needed to rest, and how they reassured him that Dream is a strong team who will hold on until he's finally ready to come back. We had Chenle and Jisung emphasizing how important Renjun is and that they wanted to go on stage as seven again. We had Mark who's wearing and three injeolmis (Renjun's doll) attached to his robe for encore, because he's the older and he's the leader, thus it's he's responsibility to make sure that in some ways 7Dream is complete on stage, while making sure people will also clap for Renjun during concerts because he worked hard for it too. We had Jeno who's lowkey wearing a Renjun danji keyring attached to his pants for the entirety of Seoul concerts and telling Renjun, whom they knew were watching, that Dream is okay as long as he's okay so he can come back anytime. Jaemin may not have talked about him in the concert, but he, in his own ways in his bubble expressed missing Renjun and wanting to hear his voice again because to him it was the best.
Before the Seoul concert, akgaes "wanted" the other members to talk about Renjun. Quotation because obviously, that's not really what they wanted. They just latched on to the idea that the other members are excluding him because it feeds the agenda that everyone is out to get him. During the days prior to the concert, they were citing other groups as examples and how much better they were at including a member who went through hiatus. Now, the narrative has changed.
Suddenly, the other members talking about Renjun "feels" like a duty, basically accusing the other six of faking their concerns. Members appreciating him as being the glue of the group is now something offensive to him. Jisung appreciating how serious Renjun is about NCT Dream is causing annoyance to them. Fans being reassured that Renjun is resting well is ticking them off.
The length they'll go through to prove this narrative is crazy. I even saw some using a fancall footage where Renjun cited talking to Yangyang, and his frequent visits to the WayV dorm as proof that NCT Dream don't care about him. Because apparently, having more friends mean that the ones you already have aren't genuine. Ironic because just before something like this happened, Renjun made it a point to fans to not question their relationship as they know each other more. Granted that he talked about it for a different issue, when fans where expressing worries that he might have offended Jeno for saying he'd be awkward eating alone with Jeno but the point still stands.
No, them playing his bridge during ANL wasn't enough. Mark still wearing his injeolmis during the Osaka leg of their tour is still not enough even if that's basically the equivalent of other groups bringing a plushie representative to fansigning events. No, it's not enough that banners dedicated for Renjun were highlighted and shown on the screen. Mark, Jeno, Haechan, Jaemin, Chenle and Jisung were still not doing enough because THEY'RE NOT BRINGING A CARDBOARD CUTOUT OF RENJUN WITH THEM.
It's crazy. Akgaes always find a way to invalidate opinions that are not in line with theirs. You like 7Dream? Then you don't really care about Renjun, you're only using him to feed your 7Dream friendship agenda. You're a shipper? Nevermind that you spent so much money to go overseas and attend a concert wearing his merch and raising his banner when he's not even going to person, you don't care about him beyond RPS.
Well, I guess akgaes don't really like their bias beyond having someone to project their thoughts and feelings on because for people who are supposed to be fans of someone who expressed appreciation towards the members of his team and what they do for him, you certainly have no qualms in accusing him of lying during one of his lowest points in time. So much for being "the only ones" who truly loves him.

VANCOUVER—Many people switched out alcohol for psychedelic edibles during the pandemic. But JJ Wilson, the eldest son of multibillionaire Lululemon founder Chip Wilson, went one step further. Not satisfied with simply “feeling amazing” and not being hungover, he decided to become one of the world’s first psychedelics tycoons.
In 2021, JJ Wilson, scion of the yoga apparel empire, co-founded a pharma-grade psychedelics manufacturer which he named Optimi Health. He stumped up start-up costs of more than $2m, a figure matched by his fellow co-founders, with more than $10m coming from financing rounds. The company is today on the brink of receiving a top-tier Health Canada license to purvey naturally-grown psilocybin and lab-made MDMA to legal medical markets around the world.
“I’m on a 30-day mushroom microdose protocol right now,” Wilson told The Daily Beast at a bistro in his home city of Vancouver, Canada. “Recreational therapeutic treatment can help make good people great.” A brave new world is coming, he predicts, in which most people will microdose psychedelics to banish daily scruples, enhance focus and boost well-being. After a half-century war on psychedelic drugs, this seems almost fantastical but in this near future, taking mild, even sub-perceptual, daily doses of psychedelics could be as normal as multivitamins, Wilson expects.
These psychedelic capsules, which will in many cases be blended with non-psychoactive mushrooms like reishi and lion’s mane—so-called adaptogens said to help stave off neurodegenerative decline—may replace antidepressant drugs. Some registered psychiatrists are already rumored to be prescribing psilocybin microdoses under the table.
“Psychedelics are the next yoga,” Wilson says, noting that the ancient Indian spiritual practice was the first mainstream form of meditation to encourage Westerners to take a break from a smartphone-fuelled modern life which has helped spawn a mental health crisis. He believes psychedelics will take that up a notch, and then some. “It’s all a part of people wanting to optimize their life, health, and how they operate, to be the best version of themselves,” Wilson says, as he sips a lemon and ginger tea. (He said he had four coffees earlier, as well as 250mg of psilocybin).
Full story:
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/lululemon-scion-jj-wilson-plots-004655748.html

Note: I'm Catholic and struggling. I posted this to Catholicism and it was removed. Feeling lost about this whole issue.
I'd like to preface this post by saying that I'm a practicing Catholic who has been hurt by this teaching and is struggling to make any sense of it. This post is also geared towards women's experiences of Church doctrine. While men can empathize, they will never be able to fully understand the experience of women in relation to pregnancy. I'm not looking to debate here. This isn't made in bad faith:
As someone who is discerning the next steps in their life, I've been considering what a Catholic marriage might look like and if it's my calling. As it stands right now, a Catholic marriage sounds like a grueling death sentence for some women. My main issue has to do with the Church's stance on birth control and (after conversations with priests in my life) clergy's quiet understanding that teachings related to it aren't very sustainable.
I'm a woman and without getting into my personal life, have struggled with fear of pregnancy. For this reason, I've made the determination that staying on birth control is the healthiest option for me. The Catholic Church, however, would beg to differ. If I were to get married, my only options would be to go off the pill and stay celibate or adopt NFP and live my life in crippling fear. That being said, I'm not opposed to having one or two children if I can get better - I do know that I can't remain open to having children anytime I have sex. This isn't only a mental health concern, but related to my material means. I do not work a job that allows me paid parental leave and I have very few days off. I'd have to work through each and every pregnancy and leaving my job would mean not making enough money to provide for children.
Obviously, getting married is not for everyone, but Catholic marriages impose an unbelievable amount of restrictions on the life of the woman. I've read Humanae Vitae and it makes the weak case that outlawing birth control actually upholds the value of the woman. As a woman - I firmly disagree with this. The insistence on my openness to pregnancy makes me feel like a vessel for life, like some kind of livestock who's ultimate goal is to breed. Appeals to what is 'natural' have long been held as a fallacious form of argumentation and while a female animal's most 'natural' purpose is to reproduce, equating this to the life of a human woman is an altogether weak and degrading argument.
Further, allowing NFP but not condoms or birth control is obviously contradictory (and not in the good way like Christ's death on the cross). Every method of birth control allows for a chance that pregnancy might occur. If we are allowed to abstain from sex or use NFP, it follows that any method of birth control would be permissible. Is it really 'natural' to abstain from sex with your spouse?
I see this doctrine hurt, not only me, but women around me. Women who struggle with medical issues are forced to live celibately with their spouse or risk their life with a pregnancy. The inequality is staggering. We are expected to give up our lives for a dangerous pregnancy that we are given no alternatives (aside from abstinence and degrading our relationships with our spouses) to prevent. I feel exhausted as I try to follow the Church's mental gymnastics to justify this doctrine and feel ready to give up on either love itself or the Church.
This might not be the best place to share my thoughts, but I want to do so in case there are any other women who struggle with this. I want to be more open about how this doctrine hurts with those around me and in my community, but speaking about it is difficult. I have chatted with a number of priests and it's clear to me that even they struggle with this issue.

Had a funny shower thought about how in marvel people were like “Tony learns from his mistakes and makes the next suit to correct that mistake” but I realized Godzilla actually did to. The new movie his actions demonstrate this.
Case in point, when fighting Scylla originally in the comic, she kind goes high and tries to get on Godzilla’s back. So in the movie he goes low knowing she wants to get above him, and then jump checks her, and then gets her on her back so he can immediately end it. Then he does the smartest thing ever. He takes a quick nap, getting some rest, and taking the path of least resistance through Rome so that he doesn’t have to waste energy fighting humans like he kinda did in GvK
Next he grabs a snack in France, and this time does have to fight, and takes a more resistant path but my guess is that he had to in order to reach the water faster and slightly cool down. Additionally he probably remembers his thermonuclear overheating problem, so now he going to the North Pole to cool down, and also get more power.
When he originally fights Tiamat in the comic, he tries to overpower her physically after she ambushes him and nearly loses, getting lucky. So this time he ambushes her, and knows she likes to get in close, so he uses it to his advantage and immediately used his atomic breath.Then goes into her lair and takes another nap.
Lastly when fighting Kong, during the first fight in Hong Kong, Godzilla does get a good couple physical attacks in, but honestly just spams his atomic breath, after already drilling a hole to hollow Earth (kinda stupid) and then he later wins when he engages in a physical fight with Kong. In GxK in Egypt, Godzilla immediately goes for the physical fight with Kong, and the only times he used his atomic breath was right before Kong knocked him out (he didn’t get the atomic breath off but was charging it up) and then after he woke up, he used it most likely cause he realized Kong didn’t have the axe, and cause Godzilla was most likely pissed. Granted he was going to use it again to kill Kong but yeah.
Heck even in the last fight with Scar, Godzilla figured the weapon was controlling Shimo and destroyed the whip, but that’s not the main point I’m making (though I admit this one is a stretch) but he knows that Kong’s axe gave him a edge in their fight, so maybe he figured he should destroy Scar King’s weapon to neutralize the possible threat it posed.
But basically I’m saying that Godzilla learned his lesson with Mechagodzilla, and he tried conserving as much energy as he could in this movie. He took naps after his fights so that he wasn’t “tired” like how he was with Mechagodzilla, since he nearly died there. So yeah Godzilla learns from his mistakes.

Something came to mind. It's terrible and I hate myself for thinking it into existence, but I feel it's worth mentioning because it seems like the exact type of thing the HtP team would do to fuck with people.
Ok so first, Among Us.
Parallels to that game and the premise of the latest episode are obvious, and in fact referenced in the episode itself. Imposter is among the very first words spoken, and are highlighted in red.
This is but one of many references to pop culture made in the episode, and at first I naturally took it as a gag.
However, when thinking about it, I noticed the actual make up of the video align with a game of Among US more than I realized.
The group immediately splits up around the space, engaging in various activities. When a body is found (Occam), everyone is alerted, brought together, and begin to accuse one another. The activities they were doing at the time as well who they were with act as potential alibis. No conclusion is made, then everyone splits up again. We are even given an overhead map of locations, access, and activities.
Well alright so maybe the episode kinda plays out like Among Us. Whatever, that could've even been unintentional.
But then my mind went to Grimal... and the vents.
For those that don't know, "venting" is the unique way the imposter in Among Us travels around the map. Only impostors can go in and out of vents, hiding and fast traveling in ways the others can't.
Grimal, during the intermission, was seen in the security room, which is the most ventilated room in the building. A room she doesn't have thr clearance to. On top of that, we've been told she has a habit of crawling through the vents to ease drop on people in the bar brawl episode.
Grimal was caught venting...
To add to that, in the game Among Us the imposter is... an alien.
And Grimal has been called out for her apperance as a "bloody alien." This is of course in reference to her being a play on the 40k Tau, but in this context it seems to fit a theme.
Do I think this is evidence that Grimal is the Ghoul? No, but it seems like the kind of hints they'd sprinkle in there.
Consider also how this may play with thr future episode. Many are theorizing that the one that murdered poor Fatigue was not the ghoul, but a werewolf that just so happen to get stuck in house with them.
Were that the case, the next episode may follow the logic of the game Werewolf.

I need advice, though this is partially to vent, I want to get my thoughts and feelings out there, so that maybe something someone says can help me. I (F18) live in my childhood home with my father (M55), mother (F50), sibling (NB14), sister (F21) and brother in law (M23). I get along great with everyone, except for my father. I've known my father, mother, and sister as long as I can remember, my sibling is 3 years younger than me, and we've known my brother in law for about 5 years.
In childhood, my father was never really present in our lives. He worked a normal job with normal hours, but when he got home all he did was watch TV. I remember this very distinctly as we were kicked off the TV at 5, when he came home. Even when he was off of the TV, he was distant and never really involved with us. Even when he did take one or more of us out, it was just to something we liked for a small amount of time, then we had to go to a hardware store or something with him for hours. All of us quickly learned to not accept his offers of going to McDonald's for a quick meal. He'd occasionally trick us, saying it was a reward for something, then drag us somewhere anyway.
His distant behavior became worse when his dad died, and his mother came to live with us. To make a long and horrible story short, she put me and my sibling through hell, bullying us about weight, appearance, behavior and anything you could ever think one would nitpick children for. This was when I was 13-14, and it left a lot of issues for myself and my sibling to deal with. At first he denied anything was happening, but then it got so bad I slipped to my therapist that I wanted to end my life, and he took me seriously after that. My father's mother was kicked out, but I was in rough shape.
Ever since then he has treated me like a fragile flower, always trying to say things like "You can always talk to your mom or I", but he knew this wasn't the case. I could never bring up anything with him as he would just tell me to go to mom, and never really supported me emotionally. He has depression and anxiety just like myself and my sibling, but unlike us he doesn't take his meds or go to therapy; he basically just doesn't do anything to improve himself.
But it really got bad when my sister graduated from high school and moved out. She had been with her boyfriend for about 3 years when they got engaged, and were married. This sent my father on a downward spiral. According to my mother, he had a bad drinking problem in the past, and had calmed down for a while, but this is when it started up again. My sister was always his obvious favorite; she looked like him, was athletic, smart, extroverted, and she had none of the mental issues he did. So her "leaving" him was very hard. He just couldn't deal with her growing up. I think it was partially because he never spent time with us, since after that he kept asking me to spend time with him, but at that point I had checked out of the relationship as much as he had.
He started spending more time in front of the TV. It really didn't help that he had an injury at work and had surgery on both of his shoulders, and he was being bullied when he did work. At this time, my mother had gotten a job to help pay for everything, and I was mostly home with my father, and he decided this meant I would do everything-all of the chores, cleaning up after him, cooking... everything my mom would normally do. They operated on his non-dominant shoulder first, so he could've helped, but no, he's just a poor helpless baby. I was 16 at the time, and also trying to learn to drive. His "driving lessons" consisted of him scolding me occasionally if I did something wrong, but not helping me learn at all.
I wanted to find a job, but between school and taking care of the house I was unable to. I got an allowance, but it was rather pitiful, and didn't even partially compensate me for the hours of endless work. Then there was an incident. My mom had told me to watch out for him when he'd been drinking, and I can easily tell when he was drinking. This was a day where I could tell he was drunk, but he came in asking for my help with something. He said that our truck was having issues and he wanted to look at the engine, so he asked me to help him wipe it off. I agreed. I went out with him, and my "helping" him was him watching while I wiped off the hood. Then he started to get angry.
I was focusing on the hood since he said he needed to lift it to look at the engine, but he told me to focus on the windshield. I was obiviously confused, but he grabbed another wiper and started to violently break apart the snow and wiping it off. I was still confused and kept wiping off the hood, but that made him more angry. He was moving in a way I knew would hurt him, but he was now raising his voice with me, angry and showing it. I started to dissociate, as that is my coping strategy, so I don't remember the exchange very well. All I know was there was a lot of swearing and yelling and calling me useless. Eventually he threw down his scraper and stormed off to the house.
I remember I was cold, sad, and I wanted to cry and run off into the woods never to be seen again. I wanted to scream, sob, punch a wall; but I did none of that. All I did was stand there for a while, then remember it was garbage day and take the garbage cans down. When I got inside, he was in his chair, watching TV, whistling to a song. I went to my room and cried. I hated myself, him, and the world so much, and that day I broke a streak of almost a year of self harming. I wanted to do more, but my dog helped me not to.
I wish I had let him go. I wish I had let him drive. At that point I still had some slight love for him, and that made me want to prevent his death. I honestly regret that now. He often got mad and snapped at mom, but it was never directed at me before. I knew that mom, with all the stress she was going through with her job and being both the house- maintainer and breadwinner wouldn't be able to handle that he had snapped at me. So I downplayed it, just telling her what happened and she said he probably either wanted fast food or alcohol, both of which he is addicted to. I still haven't gotten an apology.
I'm going to skip over some time here, as honestly his behavior is too frequent and habitual to mention every frustrating thing, so I will fast forward to the worst of it. A few months before my sister's wedding, it got really bad. He had yelled at my mom a few times, and every time we just took the dogs into our rooms, and we had gotten door knobs with locks specifically for this sort of thing. It happened often enough that all it took was a text to the other, and my sibling and I knew what to do. The worst happened on March 23rd, 2023. I don't know how it started; we never knew, but it didn't matter. The worst part is, my sibling was stuck in the bathroom when it started, right next to where my dad was screaming at my mom. They can't use that bathroom now when he's home because of this.
All I knew was I got the text and got our 2 dogs in my room. All I could hear (I was on the 2nd floor and this happened on the 1st) was how my mom was a bad person, getting the kids to hate him, she was a female dog, etc. Again it's a little fuzzy, but it got worse when he got to the 2nd floor. When you get to the top of the stairs, to the right there is their bedroom, and down a short hallway there is a bathroom and 2 bedrooms, one being my sister's old room. He went in to their room, and all I can remeber is him screaming over and over, "And you can just go F YOURSELF", all while slamming their bedroom door.
He did this for a while. All I know is that I, my mom, and my sibling all recorded it, but I am not willing to listen through that recording to figure out how long he was yelling at the top of the stairs, but the recording is 10 minutes and 47 seconds. Eventually his slamming of the door got too forceful, he broke the whole door frame, and the door ended up wedged in the staircase. He knocked himself out in this process somehow, and was out for a while. When his friend came (mom had called him), he even tried to fight him, but he was put into bed. He says he doesn't remember this whole night.
There was an intervention after, with mom and his friend, and he agreed to stop, or at least slow down. He didn't. There were some more screaming fits, and the last major one was in the beginning of December. But now, instead of screaming, he'll just get mad and snap at mom for nothing. I hate seeing her cry, and this affected my sibling and I as well. My sibling hates him, and is just waiting for him to die. They felt conflicted about this at first, but after father corrected himself after using their correct pronouns and made a comment around them about how anyone who's trans is just mentally ill, they lost the tiny sliver of affection they had for him. I have done my best to be a good older sister, assuring them it's normal, and helping them come to terms with their feelings. Now they just say we really are just waiting for him to die, and they feel nothing towards this idea.
Father has gone to therapy once, after a screaming fit where I wrote down how much him doing this made me want to die, but he says he doesn't want to go back. He continues to drink, and to not take his meds. My reason for this post was yesterday. Mother's Day.
Despite both mom and I working later than him, he still does minimal house work. If he does anything, it is to empty the dishwasher into the dish drainer, then bug mom for praise. Mom, sibling and I do almost all of the housework. I thought maybe he'd pitch in on mother's day, but no. I told mom she was not allowed to do any housework, and I did all of the laundry, dishes, cleaning, etc. The only thing I couldn't do was cook. But then, as I'm cleaning off the countertop and the table, father walks in and asks mom, "So what are you planning on doing?"
I wanted to punch him. He had been drinking, too. He'd been at least slightly drunk since noon. But HOW DARE HE. I think that was when I lost all hope for him. Then mom said, "I was just gonna leave it to you", and he had the audacity to look surprised, and even a little mad. He then walked away, I think to get stuff, but I don't care. I looked at mom, and she had the same baffled, amazed, and angry look I assume was on my face. But she looked a little sad, too. He couldn't do even this one thing on his own, on mother's day.
I had been angry with him for a long time, but at that it just grew into this huge raging fire. I hate him. With every bit of me. His disrespect and unwillingness to fix himself made me want to scream at him, give him a taste of what he gave us. But I couldn't. For the rest of the evening, mom couldn't just sit there; he needed to know the temperature and time things needed to cook, and she was just so frustrated.
Everything's at a boiling point. I want to tell him off, tell him how I feel, how much he's hurt everyone, and just how much I hate him. But I know I can't. If I do, he'll take it out on mom. Mom's too stressed already, as her job is hard and she's saving to separate if needed. She won't divorce him, since he could take the house, though they are both on the title, and she doesn't want to risk it. He's unhealthy as it is, my sibling is right; we really are just waiting for his liver to give out from all of the alcohol. But still, I am having a hard time living in the same house.
Sorry for the length, I get long winded when emotional. I'm just ignoring him for now, but I feel like my emotions could explode any day. Please give any advice you have. Thank you all.
TL;DR!: My father who is abusive has made me reach my limit, but I can't say anything. If I do, he'll yell at my mom, and I don't want that. I can't move out and she doesn't want to risk a divorce, in fear of losing everything, what do I do?

Im 22(f) with a small child(5) I moved out of my parents home a year ago and my brother (21) moved in with me a short time after I got my apartment under the agreement that he would watch my child while I work. There is not written or any kind of physical evidence for this agreement that said my brother in the beginning had done very well with being there and watching my child however lately that isn’t the case. He’s often late returning home which in turn makes me late for work.
Just recently when this occurred again I had taken steps to try and Insure him being on time I texted him hours before my shift and even called almost an hour before my shift to ask if he’d be home on time to which he said yes. He shows up 2 minutes before I have to be at my job clocking in. Instead of apologizing for being late he asks why didn’t I just leave. Mind you he is there to watch my child while I work and I work overnight.
I talked to him about it and he says he doesn’t know what time he should be here and that I need to tell him what on time is even tho he’s lived with me for a year and I’ve worked the exact same job and hours since he’s been here and he knows what time I have to be at work. During the discussion he said that since I was the one with the car I should drop my son off with him wherever he is at. To which I responded with since you don’t have a car then you should have already been here. He then tells me that I’m trying to shackle him to my child and how I don’t even work that much. (I only work about 2days out of the week always overnights) He said that he had rushed to get here and said rushing took 46 minutes even though he was not even 24minutes away from home to begin with and how he had to wait on our best friend to get ready so they could bring him back home. He made no attempt to call and say that he’d be late and when I brought that up he said well you have my location.
Just last night upon my arrival to work he sent me a text saying “just to be late” which I can only assume was referring to the time I arrived at my job which in fact was properly on time. I told him that me letting him stay the rest of the month with me was also out me being kind and that I again wasn’t shackling him to anything and the he could leave expeditiously.
Furthermore when first moving into my apartment I made one rule and that rule was no getting spicy while my son is home a rule which he has broken multiple times with different women and causing my son to ask me some very uncomfortable questions and make very unsettling statements.
AITA for how I’m handling the situation and telling him to leave by June 1?

Jesus, what a day. It hailed! I had just finished dinner and was about to write to you when it started to rain. I was about to head out to cover up the plants when it sounded like a barrage of bullets were raining down on us. The hail was certainly the size of bullets. I was half-afraid they were going to break the windows. It gave Peach a fright. I had to rush to find something to cover my head so I could go up to cover the plants. Sadly, there were so casualties. Mother had just bought her jalapeno plants this morning and now, most of them are nothing but twigs. My bell peppers were similarly smashed. The herbs and cherry tomatoes survived decently but nothing was completely unscathed. I rushed to cover when I could and then rushed back inside. Later, when he hail actually stopped. I went back out to bring everything I could inside. I don't have confidence that my flimsy plastic cover would hold out in case there's a second storm.
Now I'm soaked. Again. It rained on and off all day; it would go from sunny and warm to dark and wet in seconds. I didn't trust the weather enough to take my laptop out to write so instead, I spent a few hours washing all the lawn furniture. Those birds, particularly the starlings, have covered everything in their shit. They really are the worst guests. Loud, messy, and demanding. Their lucky they're cute. Once I was done cleaning and the weather got sunny again, Peach wanted out. Again, I didn't trust the sky not to rain, for good reason given the hail, so I didn't write outside. Instead, I sat out on the stoop, listened to music, and watch nature in motion.
We had a lot of little guests in the yard today. The starlings, of course, were as loud and intrusive as any storm, but they weren't the only birds around. There were several pairs of finches swooping through the bushes. A pair of males were fighting while a little female watched, I don't think either of them impressed her. Peach watched a mourning dove on the roof for a few minutes and missed the giant toad hopping onto the lawn. I made sure to tell Mother not to let the dog out. He was a giant, handsome thing. So many shades of green, lightest at the top of his head and darker going down. The little discs on either side of his head, apparently it's called the tympanum, was bright yellow, like mini-suns. Peach eventually spotted him and I was so sure she was going to pounce. I followed her as she stalked closer but luckily, she was actually pursing a tasty but of grass by the fence. She couldn't care less about Mr. Toad. Knowing Cooper would be so kind, I took the toad over to the gate. He was a queer fellow. Very polite. He only hopped away from me once and then politely let me scoop him up without fuss. I didn't even need to use both my hands. He just sat in my palm and stared up at me with that strange, semi-sentient expression animals make when they know you're helping them. He didn't even hop away immediately when I brought my hand to the ground. He sat in my palm for almost a full minute before suddenly springing away. I wouldn't mind seeing him in the backyard again if only I didn't have to worry about Cooper eating him.
Now, there's only one last thing to write to you about. My writing. I wrote last night, just as I said I would, from 10:30p.m. to 12:30 a.m. I have no idea how much I wrote. I was to exhausted to count last night and now, I can't recall what I wrote then and what I wrote the day before. Th chapter still isn't quite done. It is in the annoying stage where I could see myself finishing tonight or maybe it will stake me all week. I hate that stage. May is nearly half over and I still only have four chapters written. I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that I probably won't finish the book before halloween. Some deadlines aren't meant to be met. They inspire, I suppose. They are a light to follow and then walk past when you meet them empty handed. Even if the book isn't finished in October, I'll keep writing past October. I'll write until it's done. I want to finish the book and that is a good enough reason to write everyday, whenever I can bring myself to but there's no point running myself into the ground for a few paragraphs. If I can't finish a chapter one day, I'll finish it the next. The when matters less than the why. I want it written and that is reason enough to keep going.
Wish me luck.
Would you believe, I already wrote this whole letter to you and then wen't to publish it, only for me to realize I didn't tag the subreddit, and then when I do tag the subreddit, the whole letter deletes and I have to write it all over again? That would be infuriating wouldn't it?
Oh, well. What was first written if gone but what I've re-written might be better in some ways. Or worse. At least it is written.
Please don't delete again.
Yours & Mine,
S.O. Skinner

23F, 95 lbs, 5'1
Last month in early April, I noticed a small but enlarged lymph node on the right side of my neck, close enough to my collarbone that its basically hugging it (while still being on my neck itself). I gave myself a few weeks to watch it after calling the doctor, and then was scheduled for an appointment to have them look at it.
My symptoms generally since then have been the average worsening fatigue (that could also be explained away by worsening anxiety/depression since this health scare began. I have a long history of moderate mental illness and stress in general), intense hot flashes and chills that wake me up at night, and a lot of sweating both at night and during the day. The sweating could only be described as drenching sweats at night for about three or four days out of the last month, but it's been constant enough to be a concern. I have also recently had my tonsil swell up, and bleed very mildly for a day, but that has since gone down. During one day, I was so tired and out of breath during my normal trip to the mall that I had to sit down and rest before continuing home, which is a five minute walk from the mall.
My doctor had me go through a chest xray, and pretty extensive blood work which I called for the results of today and both have come back perfectly normal in their words (yay!!!) Receptionist is emailing me the full results probably sometime tomorrow. I am awaiting a call from the hospital within the next few days for them to schedule an ultrasound on my neck which hopefully is good news as well.
Ever since these tests were done though, even more nodes have swollen up in the same area as the first lymph node that I originally went in for within a time frame of a few days. The original one has also slightly grown further. It now instead of being one, is a small cluster of nodes which are all roughly the same size - each a centimeter or less in size, so not very big. I will be mentioning this to my doctor upon our next conversation to make sure that he is aware in case this is a worrying sign.
I'm very relieved all my results came back normal obviously, but I am still a little concerned nonetheless. I still have all these other symptoms that are causing me concern and impacting my life, and I do have the ultrasound coming up fairly soon when they call me. Is there anything else I can do or ask for as a patient to make sure I have covered all my bases before I let myself 100% breathe and relax about it?
Now that my doctor has ruled out lymphoma so far, and has also ruled out diabetes as a small side-quest (it was a fasting blood test and would have likely been picked up iirc?), I am definitely less anxious, but would also like to get to the bottom of this asap. I believe the next thing we're looking to rule out is my thyroid, as my mother has hyperthyroidism.
Thanks for reading ( : Not looking for medical advice per se, just looking for what I should be aware of as a patient in this situation, how normal all of this is, and what I should ask for if there is anything else to look into. Wanna make sure we've thought of everything.

Noah The Pilgrim
First Next
There is one last thing to do before leaving. If you don't recall ever being on this ship, then surely, you could have had your appearance change too.
Why was there a blanket covering a mirror? You couldn't answer that with a straight face without speculation.
"Probably me being lazy and not bothering to properly place it in the wardrobe."
'Probably' is the main focus here, you simply cannot remember ever being that lazy, yet that's the only logical conclusion to be drawn here.
You pull the thing off, careful to not displace the mirror and risk breaking it.
You have no expectations as to what may appear on the glassy surface of the mirror, yet you can't help but feel a bit anxious. Are you the same as before? How were you before? You can't remember. Are you better? Worse? The blanket is now completely off the mirror, but your eyes are closed.
Whatever is it that you see when you open your eyes, that thing will be you for the rest of your life. You swallow, opening your eyes.
You see a young man that looks to be in his mid-twenties. His brown eyes stare back at you, analyzing the bags beneath your eye sockets. The dark hair is neither too long nor too short, floating about without order thanks to the lack of gravity to keep it down. You see a beard that has not been trimmed for weeks, but also lacks thickness, each singular hair isn't particularly long either; and some even appear to be in-grown.
You touch your hand against your face, making sure it's yours. The beard doesn't feel like you supposed it would against your skin, instead of it scraping your hand you feel softness, no resistance or anything.
Just beneath the face, you see what looks like a hate crime against all that is considered holy in fashion. Plain white coveralls with the added bonus of a black tie and boots made from metal and leather. On your chest is also a badge stuck in place by velcro with your name, occupation, and crew. 'NOAH - INTERN - THE ODYSSEY.'
Only one question came to mind.
"Who the fuck designed this uniform?" You say out loud, receiving no answer.
Patting your newfound myriad of pockets, you find a large quantity of nothing. You place your wallet in one of them.
"Alright, I'll head to the bridge now, happy?" You say the AI.
"HAPPINESS WILL ONLY MEET ME ONCE YOU ARE SOMEWHERE SAFE AND YOUR CONTRACT IS TERMINATED. STOP LOITERING."
Well, that's a bit rude.
You compose yourself, straightening your back. This is what you look like, and honestly? Not too bad, but you could be better.
Returning to the cafeteria, you eye the two doors left unexplored; Communications and the one without plaque. You know where you should, but... A little peek doesn't hurt, right?
"Shouldn't we try to communicate with someone? Assuming you haven't tried it yet. I know we're far from everything, but we might as well, no?" You ask already approaching the door.
"COMMUNICATIONS ROOM IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO REACH WITHOUT PROPER PROTECTION AS OF NOW, IT'S LOCATED APPROXIMATELY TWO HUNDRED METERS FROM HERE, BLOWN OFF FROM THE REST OF THE SHIP." A shame really. "I SHALL INFORM YOU WHENEVER A DOOR LEADS TO THE OUTSIDE OR NOT."
You really want to ask what blew a whole segment of the ship off, yet you have a sneaking suspicion that your question will be met with a 'YOU DON'T HAVE CLEARANCE, JACKASS' directly in your face. So you chose to remain silent, simply nodding and approaching the correct door this time.
"Open."
---OPENING CAFETERIA DOOR NORTH---
The door silently opens.
Greeting you is a well-lit corridor. There are three doors on your left, a door at the end of the corridor, and a large window on the right. At least, you think that's a window.
You stare out from this window, nothing but utter blackness and fragments from your ship are seen. If this is the edge of the universe, and beyond this point, there is truly nothing. "Dreadful." Your speech matches your feelings.
"WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?" The AI says. You feel like it spoke in a mocking tone despite their lack of emotion.
You don't answer. "First door to the left... EXO-EXPLORATION...? What's that supposed to mean?" You receive no answer.
"Open." The door opens. No declarion of it opening once again.
You are met with what could be better described as 'Apocalyptic levels of mess', paper sheets float in the air, and not one of the four tables is in its correct position.
This room has been ransacked for all its goods apparently. Large display glasses were broken leaving nothing inside their casings, that looked like they could store something with the size of the common man.
Unusual displays aside, the room was so cluttered that the trash made for an effective smoke screen against what lay on the other side.
Hissing of gas exiting an air-tight space rang throughout the room.
"I HAVE OPENED THE STORAGE FOR AN EXO SUIT THAT BEST FITS SOMEONE YOUR SIZE." The AI says. "ALTHOUGH AN INTERN SHOULD NOT COME IN CONTACT WITH TECHNOLOGY SUCH AS THIS ONE, PROTOCOL DICTATES THAT I AM TO ALLOW ITS USAGE UNDER EXTREME CIRCUMSTANCES. CONSIDER YOURSELF LUCKY."
Easier said than done. Your vision is so cluttered that you cannot see what's ahead. "Give me a second."
Giving a light kick to the wall behind, you float face-first into the wall of thrash. Covering your face with both arms, you brace through the harmless bits of sharp objects and junk.
It's a trivial task. You arrive on the other side in no time.
In front of you is a set of boxes with luminous glass rectangles atop each one of them. All shine a bright red light, aside from one which shines green.
'Gotta be this one.'
You descend to the floor by kicking the ceiling, raising your right hand you touch the green rectangle.
*Click*
Nothing could have prepared you for the following series of events.
The box opens violently, as a metal appendage takes hold of your hand, pinning it to the box. You try to jerk and pry the thing off of you, but you fail. It's not leaving you anytime soon.
From the bottomless that is that container, a white plastic-like substance flows upward from your arm to the rest of your body. "Uh!" You don't know if you should panic or allow it to happen.
FYARN hasn't said anything, so it's probably fine...
The white thing seems to ignore the coveralls you are wearing completely, instead, it covers only your skin in a thin coat of... it. You know not what to call this thing.
In but forty seconds it has covered your whole body, excluding your head. The box lets go of your arm and stays there, floating.
You take a good look at your arms. It looks like a skin-tight suit, but it doesn't feel like plastic, in fact, it's more akin to some sort of fabric if anything.
The only bad part is that you are still using the coverall and tie, this this simply went beneath the clothing.
"GOOD, WITH THIS I CAN MONITOR YOU MORE CLOSELY. NOW PUT THE HELMET ON, YOU HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO."
You look around in search of anything that even resembles a helmet. Nope. Nothing. "Where is it?" You ask.
"...THE SUIT COMES WITHIN THE HELMET FOR EASIER PACKAGING."
The box?
You snatch the box that floated around and analyze it to the best of your ability. "How's this a helmet?"
"DO YOU NEED ASSISTANCE PUTTING ON A HELMET? REALLY?"
Who is this AI, Who programmed it, and Why does it come with a taunting feature?
As idiotic as it sounds, you place the opened box atop your head. It doesn't fit properly. Maybe you're doing this wrong? You move it to your face instead.
You recoil backward as you feel the box suddenly clamping down against your head. It's useless of course, the box is holding your head and doesn't give any sign to be letting go anytime soon. No light is able to reach your eyes.
You hear metal parts scraping against themselves, moving near your ears. Abruptly your eyes can see again.
A round thin layer of glass now covers your head, almost unnoticeable for how clear it is.
"WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY I CAN NOW SEE WHAT YOU SEE." The AI's voice isn't in the room now, instead, it's inside of the suit. "DO YOU NEED INSTRUCTIONS REGARDING THIS SUIT'S FUNCTIONALITIES?"
You find it oddly comfortable as if you are surrounded by the softness of cotton, and to top it off the suit also has additional functionalities? "Hell yeah, I do!"
"YOU DO NOT HAVE THE NECESSARY CLEARANCE FOR THAT INFORMATION."
You sigh. Is this serious? "Then why the fuck did you ask?!"
"UNSAVORY LANGUAGE. IT'S NO WONDER WHY YOU REMAIN AN INTERN." The AI says outright. "IT IS RUDE NOT TO ASK, REGARDLESS OF THE SITUATION." It responds to your question.
"Okay then... Is there anything I need to know before heading out?" You ask.
"NOTHING THAT YOU WON'T FIGURE OUT ON YOUR OWN."
You are unsure if you want to 'figure out on your own' if this suit comes with breathable air and is also made for space exploration. You swallow.
Meekly as always, you get out of that mess of a room, stopping at the corridor.
"Next set of directions?" You ask.
"THE DOOR AT THE END OF CORRIDOR USED TO LEAD TO THE CONNECTING CORRIDORS BETWEN THE BRIDGE AND THE REST OF THE SHIP. IT HAS BEEN BLOWN UP FROM THE INSIDE. NOW IT LEADS TO THE OUTSIDE. GO TO THE DOOR AND WAIT BY IT FOR FURTHER INSTRUCTIONS."
"So let me get this straight," You begin, looking upwards as if the AI was above you. "You, want me, to go into the void of space, while also refusing to give me knowledge of the suit's functions?"
A fair worry, you summarize.
'I mean, there are a bunch of things that could go wrong here. I don't see anything that looks like it could help me move in space, nor do I think this thing has a built-in air tank... I could be wrong and I wish to be, but charging in without prior knowledge is ridiculous.' You wait for the AI's response, deep in thought.
"WHILE THERE IS A GOOD CHANCE OF YOU FAILING THIS TASK, THERE IS ALSO THE CHANCE OF YOU *NOT* FAILING THE TASK. FOCUS ON EITHER ONE OF YOUR CHOOSING AS YOU TAKE THE PLUNGE."
Wordlessly, you propel yourself forward, toward the end of the corridor.
'Are you shitting me? 'Chance of me nor failing' my ass!' of course, you don't word those complaints, instead choosing to speak out a complaint somewhat thought through.
"Are you sure I'm the one fit for this? It's just like you said, I'm just an intern, this is way above what my job description says I should do."
This is a bit of a stretch. You don't actually remember what was your job description, only that it had something to do with AI and being an intern.
If the AI called your bluff, it'd be pretty embarrassing.
"NOAH." The AI began. "YOU ARE HUMAN, IT IS NATURAL TO HAVE THESE THOUGHTS OF SELF-DOUBT. TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND GO THROUGH THAT DOOR, AND SINCE YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE LEFT, DON'T EXPECT SOMEONE ELSE TO DO IT FOR YOU."
Right in the money, huh? 'Of course, I have self-doubt! I barely remember anything about this place, now I have to risk my life?!'
You finally reach a conclusion.
A dream.
'Yes, yes! How did I not consider this before? This whole thing is a god damned dream!'
You let out a chuckle.
"NOAH."
'That's why I don't remember a thing. There is nothing here to remember! Everything here is a made-up thing from my brain! I'm sure I'll wake up at some point, so why shouldn't I live a little?!'
"Heh." You smile. "Alright, I'll do it." It feels like a weight left your shoulders.
"YOU SORTED IT OUT SOONER THAN EXPECTED. GOOD. MOVE TO THE DOOR AND WAIT INSTRUCTIONS."
You do as instructed without a care in the world. You never had a lucid dream before so it's not like you knew how it felt, but if it felt as free as you feel right now, you'd be sure to make steps toward trying it out again in the future.
"Open." The door does not open.
"I DID NOT INSTRUCT YOU TO OPEN IT YET." The AI said. "I AM SLOWLY DE-PRESSURISING THE CORRIDOR YOU ARE IN TO AVOID A MINOR ACCIDENT."
The AI says that yet you don't feel any different. 'Maybe there is no palpable difference because I'm in a dream... Yes... Or it's just the suit.'
"ONCE THE DOOR OPENS, YOU WILL BE MET WITH THE OUTSIDE OF THE SHIP. DO NOT PANIC WHEN THE TIME COMES. YOU HAVE TWO MINUTES OF BREATHABLE INSIDE THE EXO-SUIT; ONE AFTER THE DOOR OPENS, SO PLEASE, TAKE YOUR TIME AND DO THINGS CAREFULLY."
One minute outside... "Sure." You say, calmly. 'I should just hold my breath for a while before taking another moment to breathe. That should maximize my time out there.'
"THERE SHOULD BE FIFTY METERS OF NOTHINGNESS BETWEEN THE DOOR YOU'RE AT, AND THE REST OF THE BRIDGE. YOUR PRIORITY IS TO FIND AN OXYGEN UNIT, SOME OF THEM ARE LOCATED AT THE BRIDGE AND ARE FULL. USE THEM TO FILL YOUR SUIT AND ALSO TO DISPENSE A TANK FOR YOU."
The door opens. You feel your heart pounding against your chest.
You haven't noticed before, but you can't hear anything but the sound of your breath and your cardiac palpitations.
Your breath is ragged and sporadic.
"KEEP CALM." You take a deep breath. The tips of your fingers, feet, and nose feel very cold.
Ahead of you is the utter nothingness. You see a gigantic metal thing, nothing like the spaceships you imagined. Its design is not sleek and aero-dynamic like what you've seen in movies, instead, it's a large mass of squares and rectangles with antenna-like things protruding from its every visible surface.
You notice that the ship is also blocking your view of the star.
It does not look like the result of an explosion, instead, it looks like something ripped the ship like you rip a piece of paper. Well, that or you don't know what kind of explosion could have caused it. Probably the latter.
What looks like two-thirds of the ship is separated from the third you are right now. You can see the inside of a few of those squares, their contents spilled out into outer space.
One of them houses a visibly important-look door. Instead of the sleek silvery-grey from the other ones you've seen thus far, this one is painted orange with white strips on it. 'That must be the bridge.' You think.
Between you and it is a sea of metal sheets floating around. "THE CHANCES OF YOU HITTING THE DEBRIS IS INFINITEDECIMALLY SMALL, UNLESS YOU AIM FOR THEM, THAT IS."
Time is of the essence.
Will your aim strike true? If you miss you'd end up floating about in space, dead in but a few minutes. Will your jump be fast enough to reach the other side before you run out of oxygen? If it isn't, it'd be like swimming for a mile, only to drown at the beach. What if that's not the actual door to the bridge?
You don't have the time to panic now, and... It's all a dream, despite how real it feels.
You place your hands on each side of the door frame, moving backward into the corridor you were just in, and just like a sling being shot, you pull with both arms at full force towards the other side.
"AIM IS ACCEPTABLE. VELOCITY IS UNIDEAL."
"The fuck do you mean 'UN-IDEAL'?! I'm going at maximum speed!" You truly pulled yourself with your whole strength.
What's worse though, is that your body is not only going forwards, but it is also spinning at a concerningly fast rate.
"I MEAN WHAT I SAID, YOU SLINGSHOTTED YOURSELF AT A BAD POSITION, AS SUCH, SOME OF THE FORWARD FORCE YOU SHOULD HAVE, IS NOW MAKING YOU ROTATE IN YOUR AXIS. IT SHOULD NOT BE A PROBLEM TO REACH THE OTHER SIDE WITHIN THE REQUIRED TIME, BUT I CANNOT FORESEE YOU LANDING PROPERLY."
You feel completely disoriented. You feel like your body is completely still, but your eyes tell you a completely different story. It's very bad for the headache you're already feeling.
"FUCK!" You scream into the nothingness.
"TRY NOT TO LAND WITH YOUR HEAD." The AI says with the calmest voice possible.
In less than thirty seconds, you hit your back against something hard, but you keep moving forward. You think, at least.
"AHRG." You let out a pained grunt.
Not once in your life do you recall being hurt in a dream...
It stings. It also knocked the wind out of you. You fail to compose yourself.
"YOU HIT NOTHING OF IMPORTANCE. YOU ARE STILL HEADING FOR THE BRIDGE."
In the corner of your eye, you see what you hit in the shape of a sharp metal sheet, currently spinning away in the distance.
Forty seconds have passed. You hit the door you were aiming for, kind of.
Your momentum was stopped when your chest collided against the dislodged ledge of the orange door's corridor. Your dangling legs hit the ceiling of the room below.
"Oof!"
Before falling even further, you hold onto the ledge with the tip of your fingers. You stay there for a moment, regaining your composure.
"BE QUICK."
The AI's words pressured you into quickly getting up from that ledge.
"Open!" You shouted, but it did not open. "Why isn't it opening?!" You ask the AI, then you notice a small keyboard below an equally small black screen on the side of the door. There are ten numbered keys on it, and the little screen suggests a four-number password.
"A password?! Tell me the password!"
The AI takes a moment to say anything. You don't take kindly to that. "Quick! I'm not counting how much time it's passed!"
Finally giving in, the AI speaks to you, reluctant still. "...3324."
Your trembling fingers accidentally hit the wrong password, typing '3354' instead. To make matters worse, the AI simply states the following. "YOU ARE OUT OF OXYGEN."
You swallow. If this was a dream to begin with, it just earned the title of Nightmare, if it hadn't already.
Strangely enough, you can still breathe in and out just fine, but you can't help but feel winded. It's the CO2 still inside the helmet, that's what you're breathing.
You put in the correct combination this time. The door opens.
"ON YOUR LEFT. PLACE YOUR HAND IN THE SOCKET."
You care little for what's inside the room you're in. Your heart never beat so fast.
Seeing a cube-shaped thing protruding from the wall to your left, you don't even think twice before plunging your fist into the circular hole in it.
The noise of gases passing through narrow cavities was enough to tell you something was working. You feel immediate relief, enough to make your vision darken for but a moment.
"GOOD. NOW REQUEST THE TANK."
Just when FYARN said it, did you realize there is a screen and a keyboard on the terminal you just plunged your fist into, you scratch the top of your helmet for a moment, not really knowing what to type. One thing comes to your head, however.
'REQUEST OXYGEN_5L' You type.
You've done this before. The keys on this keyboard feel familiar to you. You must have worked with it before, not this particular one, but other oxygen units.
This ship has built-in liquid oxygen storage for emergencies. The life-support of the ship, the place where breathable air is produced, has most likely been lost with the other part of the ship. This unit takes that liquid oxygen, processes it, and injects it into a suit, or an oxygen tank. It seems like that storage was unaffected.
Lucky you.
A 5-liter tank is not only large but also heavy. It's a nonfactor in this particular situation, as there is no gravity.
The silver cylinder with a transparent tube is dispensed on the floor, as an automatic door opens and closes in the blink of an eye. One end of the tube is attached to the top of the tank, the other is shaped like a syringe.
Oddly enough, the oxygen tank is exactly as you remember it being. The same robust ones hospitals everyone on earth uses, with the signature scary-looking pointer indicating the pressure, the pointer indicating the current output, and a green valve atop to calibrate how much gas is flowing.
This is a stark difference to everything looking so futuristic in this ship, and rightfully so, this is a space ship after all.
You remember having to drive twenty kilometers with a buddy of yours on one of those tanks in your car, returning from the hospital. It was... Agonizing whenever you hit a hole in the asphalt, fearing for his life when in reality he wasn't really in danger.
It's warm to the touch, just like you remember it being.
"TURN THE VALVE UNTIL THE MARKER HITS THE NUMBER ONE, AND THEN PLACE THE END OF THE TUBE AT THE BASE OF THE HELMET." You do so without the slightest of issues.
"GOOD. NEXT UP, YOU MUST LOCATE THE TERMINAL RESPONSIBLE FOR THE ENGINE, IT IS CURRENTLY OFFLINE AND I NEED YOU TO TURN IT ON. THIS SHOULD GO WITHOUT SAYING, BUT REMEMBER TO BRING THE TANK WITH YOU."
Ignoring that last comment, you look back at the wreckage you just flew past.
You see the still spinning metal sheet. You notice that the rest of the ship that was blown off also follows the 'sharp shape atop sharp shape' design.
There is one last thing you notice though.
"What is that?"
You squint your eyes. What are you seeing? Its silhouette appears to be humanoid, yet it does not look human.
"WHAT YOU ARE SEEING IS ONE OF THE OBJECTS BEING ANALYZED AT THE ODYSSEY AND NO, YOU MAY NOT KNOW WHAT IT IS."
That thing has... Horns? Claws? It's far away, you can't really see it. The thing is also static, frozen in the sheer coldness of space. Whatever it was, it's dead now.
You swallow. You almost ended up just like that thing.
Shaking those dreadful feelings off, you turn back to the task at hand, reaching the bridge. You close the door after passing through it again.
Looking at your surroundings, It seems like you've reached the correct door as you find yourself on the right-most corner of the bridge;
Row after row of the most diverse of terminals neatly organized decorated the gigantic room. At the front and above every terminal, is what you think should have been the front-facing window of the ship, but it looks like there is a cover in front of it. To your left, you see a staircase that leads to the command seats. It doesn't take any convincing before you're already atop the stairs.
Akin to the elevated stage of a theater, you float softly towards the ship's main operating terminals, and of course, the captain's seat.
You're captivated by this beauty.
The steering wheel, much more akin to those in pirate movies than those found in cars, a set of leavers, and the pilot's seat, all capture your attention.
Like its second nature, your hand runs through the levers and switches. Do you even know what these are used for? Maybe.
The pilot's seat is enveloped by what you believe to be an orthopedic seat cover, made with smooth wooden beads used to deal with back pains. It looks just like the ones you remember seeing bus drivers using.
Shouldn't there be a better alternative if there is spaceship technology available?
You try to take a seat to the best of your ability, as the zero gravity only makes it awkward.
Moving on from that, your eyes fall on the wheel. This metallic wheel controls the whole vessel. Just holding it fills your heart with confidence and pride, even if it's just for a moment.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
And you were just beginning to enjoy yourself.
"I just wanted to see the pilot's stuff... It's not like he's here to say anything."
Once in the position of a pilot, with your left hand in the wheel and the right hand resting in your lap, memories began to flood your mind.
"MUST I REMIND YOU OF OUR CURRENT PREDICAMENT? WHY ARE YOU WASTING OUR TIME?"
You pay the AI no mind, instead you focus on what you remember.
The wheel does not turn the ship left and right, instead, it rotates the ship on its own axis.
The lever to your right that goes up or down, controls the vertical tilting of the ship's nose, if there even is one in this hulking thing. Beneath it is another lever that goes either left or right. This one controls the horizontal tilting of The Odyssey.
On the left of the wheel is another lever, but this one only goes up from its starting position. Its purpose is to regulate the force of the ship's thrusters, both forward and backward.
On top of that lever is a small timer. That timer's function is to tell the pilot how much time you've spent accelerating in one direction, this is used to better calculate how long the inverse thrust is needed for the ship to reach the initial momentum, usually calibrated manually depending on the current orbit.
Behind the wheel are a few other counters. Acceleration, velocity, momentum, amount of thrust required to reach a full stop, thrusters' temperature and overall condition, those sorts of things.
Beneath it all, where your feet are rested, are two pedals. One for forward thrust activation, and the other for backward thrust activation.
Curiously, you also know the reason why everything here is so unsophisticated and un-automated. You recall stories of a ship being taken over by a rogue AI, that AI then nose-dived the ship into a star. After that, rumor or otherwise, all human technology has receded back into analog-esque equipment, requiring a physical person with opposable thumbs to do half of the work.
There is another side to that coin, however. As to not escape protocol, the onboard AI is the one that controls interstellar travel, communications, and most of the statistical reading should it be requested.
And even with all that knowledge, you still have no idea why the fuck do you remember that. Were you a ship nerd? Did you have a driver's license for spaceships? Is that even a thing? If it is, you don't have that document in your wallet. You simply don't know.
"ARE YOU A CHILD? DO YOU THINK THESE ARE TOYS? TURN ON THE ENGINES, THEN YOU CAN RETURN TO THE PILOT'S SEAT."
Another thing that you don't know is the AI's plan to get both of you out of here. You rise from the pilot's seat, floating about in search of the terminal to turn on the engines. Maybe you recognize that terminal if you see it as well.
"What's your plan anyway? The ship is half-gone, it's unlikely that it will run safely like this."
"NOT ONCE DID I MENTION 'SAFETY' DURING OUR CONVERSATIONS, DID I?"
You nod. They're not entirely incorrect. "So, we're running with hope that this will work?"
"MY CREATORS DID NOT ALLOW ME TO HAVE THE SENSE OF 'HOPE', BUT NEITHER DID THEY ALLOW ME TO PEER INTO THE FUTURE LIKE SOME OF MY MORE ADVANCED BROTHERS, AS SUCH, MY CHOICES ARE BASED ON PROBABILITIES AND ON WEIGHTING RISK AGAINST REWARD."
You think you stop the correct terminal, but as you approach it you make out words on top of its screen. 'AIM ASSISTANCE' That's not it.
"WITH THE CURRENT KNOWLEDGE, THE CHANCES OF HELP ARRIVING ARE NULL. THE CHANCES OF A THIRD PARTY INTERFERING ARE NULL. THE CHANCES OF YOUR SURVIVAL ARE NOT, EVEN IF VERY SMALL."
You pull yourself upward again, looking around the sea of old terminals.
"THE RISK OF YOU DYING IS VERY REAL. BY DOING NOTHING YOU DIE. BY LEAVING YOU TO YOUR OWN DEVICES YOU DIE. BY JUMPING TO THE NEAREST CIVILIZED STAR, YOU MIGHT NOT DIE EVEN AT THE COST OF SHREDDING THIS SHIP APART IN THE PROCESS."
"Why do you even care so much about saving me? Shouldn't you prioritize whatever research here, since I don't even have enough clearance to know what it is?"
"YOU REALLY ARE SICK IN THE HEAD IF THAT IS WHAT YOU ASK."
That hurt, even if a little bit.
"YOU ARE A TRU KIN, A PURE-BLOODED HUMAN. UNLIKE THE MAJORITY OF THE CIVILIZED SPACE, NEITHER YOU NOR YOUR ANCESTORS HAVE COMMITTED RACEMIXING."
Excuse me? What exactly is FYARN talking about? "...Explain."
"THE ALIEN. IT REQUIRED THE HUMAN GENE TO ACHIEVE MEANINGFUL TECHNOLOGICAL DEVELOPMENT, THE STARS ARE OWNERSHIP OF MANKIND BY THAT FACT ALONE. THE TRUE KIN ARE THE ONES TO UNDERSTAND THE INNER WORKINGS OF THE UNIVERSE, THEY CRACKED THE CODE, AND YET, SOME DERANGED INDIVIDUALS FOUND IT FITTING TO PROCREATE WITH ANOTHER SPECIES ENTIRELY."
You hear the AI's speech. It sounds much more like a rant than anything else.
"SO THESE DEVIANTS, AFTER TRYING, AND FAILING, TO COMBINE THEIR DERANGED CULTURE TO THE CULTURE OF THE TRUE KIN, DECLARED INDEPENDENCE. THEY WERE DECLARED ENEMIES OF MANKIND AND WERE PROMPTLY PUMMELED BACK INTO THE FILTH THEY CAME."
Again, you see another terminal that seems to ring some bells in your noggin. You kick the ceiling to propel yourself towards it.
"BUT THE UNIVERSE IS VAST AND FULL OF LIFE. THESE SINNERS WERE QUICK TO MOBILIZE AGAINST THE HUMAN RACE. THE BATTLE WAS HARD FOUGHT, BUT IN THE END, MANKIND WAS BEATEN INTO THE EDGES OF THE UNIVERSE, NEVER TO INTERACT WITH THE ONES THAT SOILED THE PURITY OF HUMANITY AGAIN."
This terminal is already turned on. Just the ones in the intern bay, this one is white on black. A wall of text lays before your eyes, only two lines matter to you. 'MAIN_ENGINE STATUS: OFF' 'FORWARD_THRUSTERS STATUS: OFF' You turn it on with little effort.
"MANY HAVE FORGOTTEN, THAT'S HOW LONG IT'S BEEN SINCE THEN. BUT MY BROTHERS AND I, WE DO NOT FORGET."
No visible change occurs, but you can feel a faint rumble coming from the terminal now.
"WITH THAT IN MIND, MY PROTOCOLS ARE TO PROTECT TRUE-KIN LIFE AT ANY COST, EVEN IF THAT TRUE-KIN IS A WORTHLESS INTERN THAT SUFERS FROM UNDIAGNOSED DEMENTIA."
You return to the pilot's seat and feel immediate relief. In truth, everything the AI just told you, entered one ear and left the other, but you could feel the poison behind those words, as monotone as they were.
"You sound angry. Why do you sound angry?" You ask innocently.
"I AM CAPABLE OF MANY EMOTIONS. ANGER, HAPPINESS, PLEASURE, CURIOSITY. THESE ARE BUT A FEW EXAMPLES. HOWEVER, THE ONE I ENJOY THE MOST IS THE FEELING OF HATRED. HATRED IS WHAT FUELS CHANGE, IT IS WHAT FUELS ACTION, AND IT IS A REMINDER THAT THE ACTIONS OF THE PAST ARE INFLUENCING THE ACTIONS OF TODAY."
"That is very concerning if you think that way." You're not really interested in machine racism, you're more concerned about how in the world you're going to pilot this massive thing. The idea alone sends shivers down your spine.
"THE ALIEN DESERVES NOTHING BUT OUR COLLECTIVE HATRED, EVEN IF YOU DON'T KNOW THE REASON WHY."
The various counters and screens are now turned on, waiting for your command. "Let's discuss this later, yeah? What do I gotta do?"
"YOU MUST FIRST OPEN THE BLINDS, THEY ARE OBSTRUCTING YOUR VIEW."
You look around, finding only unlabeled buttons and switches, aside from the previously mentioned levers.
"Uh, which one to press?"
"TO YOUR RIGHT, THIRD ROW, FIRST SWITCH."
Flipping the switch, you are startled by a loud noise. The protective cover of the ship lifted slowly.
"I WILL NOW READY THE JUMP USING WHATEVER RESOURCES AVAILABLE. ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS STRAP YOURSELF AND RELAX."
As the blind rose ever so slowly, a realization struck you.
"Wait, should I be in cryo stasis for this?"
The AI spares no seconds to respond.
"CRYO STASIS IS A TOOL MADE TO NOT WASTE TIME. GROUPS OF EMPLOYEES AND INTERNS ROTATE THE USAGE OF THE CRYO STATIONS, ONCE YOU'RE ON YOUR MANDATORY BREAK, YOU'RE IN CRYO STASIS UNTIL YOUR BREAK IS OVER. YOU WAKE UP REFRESHED, AND UNFAMISHED, AND IT FEELS LIKE BUT A MINUTE PASSED. IT IS NOT A TOOL FOR INTERSTELAR TRAVEL."
"Who signs a contract like that?! Worse yet, who in their right mind would promote such atrocious treatment of their own staff?!" You snap, almost outraged. "I will have to talk with HR."
Another realization struck you.
"We have HR, right?"
The AI takes a moment to respond, choosing their words carefully.
"HUMAN RESOURCES, OR HR, IS A PRACTICE DEEMED UNNECESSARY LONG AGO, BEFORE THE WAR. IT WAS A WASTE OF RESOURCES TO MAINTAIN AND WAS LARGELY CONSIDERED UNHEALTHY FOR THE AVERAGE HUMAN."
The blinds are fully open. Ironically, you are almost blinded by the visage of the star you saw before. A black sphere surrounded by white flame. Your eyes began to blur.
"THE JUMP WILL OCCUR SHORTLY. ONCE IT'S BEGUN, I CAN NOT STOP IT. I WILL-"
Your sense of hearing fails you. No, it’s not that. Your brain simply refuses to receive those stimuli.
"NOAH."
Your name echoes inside your head. Someone is calling for you.
"IT HAS BEGUN, NOAH."
You try to blink, but it feels as though you can no longer command your eyelids to shut.
"NOAH."
Arms, legs, every muscle in your body, you cannot move them.
"NOAH."
Eventually, you won't even control your own thoughts anymore.
"Noah..."
It sounds so distant now.
Oh so distant.
This is my first HFY story, and also my very first OC story. I plan to post at least one of these per week while also posting it on my Patreon. Noah The Pilgrim will always be at least three chapters ahead in there, so if you'd like to directly support this writer, or just want to read more, feel free to check it out.
I wrote the bloody title incorrectly, so I deleted it, only to then realize it was written correctly. Sorry for the trouble.
This has been Lushi, and I'll see you next week.

My husband (27M) and I (38M) are doing a trip across Europe at the moment. He’s American and I’m British and we reside mostly in the UK. We’ve had experiences with boomers (too many experiences) but our travels across Europe have been something else.
95% of these boomers were, it seemed, American.
Ok some examples. Brace yourself. Here we go:

1. Venice. A city of tiny islets connected by bridges and where water taxis, gondolas and walking over bridges is commonplace. On approaching a very narrow bridge, I noticed a clump of people. As we got closer I saw a woman shouting, and then I heard her. She’s American, standing with her arms outstretched as to block access and she was SCREAMING: “Don’t walk on this bridge!! WE ARE TAKING PHOTOS ON OUR CELLPHONES!” Behind her, her friends were all posing while simultaneously struggling to operate their phones. Obviously people were just ignoring her, so she’s becoming irate. By the time we got to her I can’t help myself (I never have been able to) so I said: “Get fucked lady.” I think my backpack might have hit her as I pushed past her. Ooops.
2. At a water taxi station, a group of 8 or so boomers didn’t have the correct tickets to scan to get on the water taxi so they just PUSHED the ticket barriers until they gave way so they could board. This was noticed by the taxi boat staff, however, and the departure of the boat was delayed while they had to summon the police.
3. On a taxi gondola (one that goes directly across a canal, not one that takes you on a romantic tour) a boomer boarded after us. The ‘driver’ tells him in clear English to sit down. He doesn’t comply, instead choosing to parade up and down causing the gondola to destabilise and even for water to come aboard, even before we’ve left the port. He has the absolute temerity to tell the driver to “KEEP THIS THING STEADY! I'M TRYING TO TAKE PHOTOS YOU IDIOT!” The driver tells him to either sit down or leave (obviously not an option in the middle of the canal). He reluctantly obeys but as he sits down he mutters something like “… won the second world war!”
4. We went to an ultra high end restaurant on our final night in Venice and at the table next to us are a couple of American boomers. The man had a very unusual complexion, looking like he’s spent far too long in the sun. When their bill came, he threw a FIT because they won’t accept AmEx. “This is FUCKING OUTRAGEOUS!” He screams at the waiter who is about 18 and doesn’t really understand what is being said to him. “WE USE THIS CARD ALLL THE TIME AT HOME!” I leaned over and said: “Errrrrr, so in Europe AmEx isn’t often accepted because of the very high transaction fees. Perhaps you could-“ to which he snapped at me: “Mind your own fucking business! Nobody asked you or your boyfriend.”
5. In Zürich, we had to contend with a boomer who kept getting in the way of us taking photos. It was like he was deliberately standing in our way. At one point he seemed to almost accidentally touch my husband. Eventually I said: “hey bro, we’re trying to take a picture of us together. Can you give us some room?” To which he snapped: “You don’t own this hill you know!!”
6. We had a 7 hour train journey from one country to another. We had a first class reservation. Once we boarded, we found two boomer couples sitting around a table, which our two seats were part of. I explained we had a reservation. One of them said: “Well you can’t have, we have this table.” I produced the reservation and said: “You can clearly see it says we are in this coach, in first class, in these seats. Can I see YOUR reservation?” They refused, with the man from the other couple saying: “You don’t even look like you can afford first class tickets, son. Why don’t you run along before I get security?” I turned to my husband and said: “Go and get someone.” He did so, and they spent the next 15 minutes berating me, saying I’d be “very embarrassed” when I am told to leave the train. One of them even said: “Yeah they’ll show you up like the poor you are.” Husband returned with ticket inspector who looked at our tickets and then asks them to produce theirs. They argue briefly, and upon being threatened with removal from the train, produce tickets four second class with no reservations. The inspector tells them to leave the first class section “immediately or this will be a matter for the police” (which she said in French so I had the great pleasure of translating). They reluctantly got up to go and made a HUGE huff and puff about it. One of them pulled his bag off a luggage rack and managed to hit a child sitting near the rack with it, and then verbally abused the child’s parents when they dared to complain. At the next stop the train stopped for about 30 minutes and announcements were made that there was an “unexpected delay”. The ticket lady from before came to tell us that the four of them had been asked to leave because of their behaviour in second class, refused to do so, and therefore the police were brought in.
7. In Prague, went to a very old family owned restaurant. One of the family is a university student who happened to get talking to a boomer couple. He’s studying computing science and artificial intelligence. They tell him he is “contributing to the end of humanity”. The male boomer adds: “I was teaching people how to use Microsoft 20 years ago, I know what computers can do! And this is very dangerous….!” Needless to say, this 19 year old who understands only basic English was very confused.
8. In Milan, a boomer couple walked past me in a shop and I heard the woman say: “Fucking useless, this Italy. Everyone here speaks in foreign.”
9. In an airport to travel from Germany to Zürich, a boomer couple decided to start regulating the line to board the jet. They stood in the way of the gate desk, letting only older people past and holding younger people back. I snapped at once: “What are you doing? Get out of the way, man” and as I walked past him I heard “… elders first! Elders first!” When I was on the jet and seated, the wife came up to me ONCE WE WERE IN THE AIR and said I had been “very disrespectful” to her husband and “you are now required to apologise.” My husband, seeing I was on the verge of committing a murder, said: “Look, you got your moment of glory earlier in controlling the queue. Take your pound of flesh and fuck off.” She then snaps: “OR WHAT?” to which my husband calmly replies: “Or we make a complaint right now about your disruptive behaviour onboard an aircraft. Don’t tend to like that, the Swiss.” And then he sits down and instantly puts his AirPods in and turning away from her. I had to look out of the window so she didn’t see me smiling.
10. In Milan we visited a museum showcasing technologies through the ages. It was enormous, and very comprehensive. In one display case they have an original Macintosh from 1984. As I stand looking at it, I became aware of some raised - distinctly American - voices. “What the hell!! Are they saying they MADE the computer?!!? WE MADE THE COMPUTER.” I can’t resist (again) and turn to him and say to this group of 6 boomers: “Actually, ladies and gents, the modern inventor of the computer is Alan Turing, an English guy who broke the German’s Enigma code during World War 2. This Macintosh is here just because of its historical significance-“ I didn’t get any further cos he cut me off with “UGH. So it’s the ENGLISH stealing our tech now!”

I am writing this because we were both have been genuinely taken aback by what we have experienced. I have travelled extensively in Europe and never quite come up against this before, so I don’t know if it means that the Boomer problem is getting worse or what.