Does hoodia have any side effects
Where wishes are dismantled.
2017.10.01 20:52 RelaNarkin Where wishes are dismantled.
Do you ever wish for things without thinking through them first? Do you ever struggle with finding the downsides of your hopes and dreams? Well, whatever the case may be TheMonkeysPaw is at your service!
2012.08.01 23:15 I want to be sugar free!
This is your place to share your stories about sugar and how it's affected your life, post links to scientific research on sugar addiction, tips for how to get sugar free, and support others who are trying to beat "the other white stuff"! We are focused on avoiding sucrose specifically (and by extension, fructose), NOT all starchy carbs (glucose).
2016.11.06 08:12 Ephemeral_Halcyon Anything related to Nexplanon.
A sub for help with or questions about Nexplanon birth control.
2024.05.14 15:51 Competitive_Berry671 Cost-plus with minimum fee, cap, carveouts
About to negotiate a cost-plus contract to build a sizeable high-end fully custom home.
Our builder is 100% open book. But want to make sure we aren't unnecessarily paying for markup on things that shouldn't be in the book in the first place.
The more I think about it, it seems a cost-plus with stated minimum fee and cap (which would go up woth any material scope changes) may work best for both sides. Is that something people in the industry see?
- Does anyone see / agree to fixed minimum + caps on the cost-plus figure, especially when the fee is large (think $500k+)?
Would let be homeowner self-supply and pay for certain items like fully custom cabinets, appliances, higher end materials choices like specific natural stone sourcing for counters & floors... while ensuring the builder still makes their profit. Would be totally fine paying a fee for any time & cost associated with the builder's need to coordinate delivery and do the install.
- What are the most common carveouts to the cost-plus situation? I've seen things like slab/foundation mentioned but is that normal for a fully custom build?
- Landscape design & install will be a large cost but we plan to hire a specific landscape design architect/company we have worked with previously. Maybe there is some fee / reduced markup % on the landscaping to account for the need to coordinate?
- Windows & doors we expect to largely work through the builder's sources. Same with functional (recessed) lighting and custom A/V stuff
- What about more personal decorative items such as chandeliers & etc.? Very likely most of those are NOT going to be through a 'normal" supplier; owner will be selecting independent of the builder
For a number of reasons, our builder is likely willing to get creative in their fee structure. And the goal on my end isn't to save money as much as it is to ensure we feel that we get appropriate value for the price.
If we end up paying an effective 15-18% (vs. quoted 12%) to the builder due to a minimum fee and the owner choosing to take on a lot of materials selection / coordination work from outside the builder's normal suppliers... then so be it.
Would love to hear any thoughts
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2024.05.14 15:50 FrescaFromSpace Solution for Intense Brain Fatigue?
I was diagnosed a couple months ago and currently take 15mg medikinet xl (slow release ritalin). For the most part it's great and I can actually be productive now. However, I now experience an occasional side effect in the form of brain fog so strong that it feels like I've simply squeezed out all my cognitive power into the morning/early afternoon and I'm in a temporary cool-down period. Brain HIIT. Simple thoughts feel hard to chain together, bordering on zombie mode. Comes on around 3pm, give or take. Gradually feel better as evening comes on.
My diet hasn't changed since starting medication, but this effect doesn't happen on a daily basis. As far as I can tell, it's more likely to occur when I've been concentrating hard and doing a lot of analysis for a while (like today). However, the magnitude of the sensation is beyond your average "I thunk hard today", and my guess is that it's some kind of electrolyte/nutrition issue combined with whatever voodoo the ritalin is doing. Oh, and I've noticed it happens more when increasing dosage or taking a relatively higher dose (e.g. 20mg instead of 15mg, or bumping from 10 to 15. That kind of thing).
Is this a known-and-resolved issue, or does anyone at least have any idea what might be going on? Next scheduled appointment isn't until late June, but that can probably be moved up if it's increasingly problematic.
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2024.05.14 15:14 ButterscotchKey9269 AITA for telling my parent not to use asd as an excuse all the time?
I (27f) was brought up in a house with my brother (24m), my mum (47f) and dad (45m). When I was younger my parents decided to have 2 more children, 2 girls - now 12 and 10. I now also have my own children, 7f, 4m, and 2f, and am in a beautiful happy marriage.
A little back story, I was pretty much a scapegoat my whole life, my brother the golden child, let's just say none of us are on speaking terms with him anymore due to him always getting what he wanted when he was younger. As he grew and after the 2 younger of us were born, he started hearing more "no's", he didnt like that and after a lot of threats, holes in walls, drugs etc, I decided to cut all contact with him. He then decided to cut contact with our parents đ¤ˇđ˝ââď¸
Anyway, we recently found out that our 7yo has adhd, and our 4yo has adhd and asd. I also found symptoms in myself that made me question my brain, and got diagnosed with asd, adhd and cptsd (i dont remember my childhood from 5yo-13yo). Whilst we were getting our array of diagnoses my parents decided to go through their own processes with my sisters, still in the process, no diagnoses have been made. This is where it starts, the 12yo, I'll call her Stacy, she is me, I was her, she is the scapegoat, she gets the blame for everything, nothing she does is right, she doesn't get help, doesn't get hugs and kisses or love. I see the ptsd symptoms coming out in her and it hurts my heart, I want to take her, adopt her and run away with her. I give her the love she needs because i can see she doesnt get it from our parents, not gonna lie, she has her faults, we all do, we're only human, but compared to our sister and brother, she's amazing.
The 10yo, I'll call her Anna, she is horrible, she makes mean comments, she manipulates to get her own way, she falsely accuses people - and not of small things, she craves attention and loves to be in the centre, she hates when my 7yo has any sort of attention and will try her best to steal it, especially from our mum, it's like she knows how to hurt your feelings and will do it if you don't do what she wants, she's showed my 7yo inappropriate videos, one day I was looking after her because she was "sick" I was in the bathroom, heard my 4yo crying begging her to stop she didn't realise I had opened the door and caught her hitting him on the head with a pillow, I told her to stop and she did. Anyway she is always looking for approval especially from female adults, she is just mean, she doesnt do anything wrong, she gets coddled while Stacy gets the blame for everything, and gets punished for everything even if she didnt do anything. My parents do nothing, they don't explain to her what she's done is wrong or why it's wrong, they sit on their phones all day, everyday and just say "oh she just has autism", but it's not an excuse... we're really not dumb, you can teach us that it's not okay to do things. I know this is how they handle it because we live on the same property, in separate dwellings, and it's the same everyday pretty much, I try my best to keep separated from them, especially Anna because she is having a negative mental effect on our 7yo, but they come over uninvited and say "mum and dad are being boring, they're just on their phones like always". Everytime I go over they've either locked themselves in the room or are sitting on the couch looking at Facebook, and expect the kids to just watch TV all day, not doing anything. I just see the same cycle happening again, Anna turning out like our druggo brother, and Stacy ending up with CPTSD and wanting to run away.
Anna falsely accused myself of scratching her with a stick today, when I was nowhere near her, she put on a whole act, crying and everything. This isn't the first time this has happened, the first time was falsely accusing my husband of something similar, when I was with him and told the truth whilst my mum was on her side and was never there. Tonight, I got deathstared by my mum, usually its the silent treatment, but also got told "Anna feels like you treat Your son like he has autism but you don't treat her like she has autism", she hasn't been diagnosed either so we don't know if it really is autism, and I treat my son with respect because he treats me with respect, I treat him the way he treats me, with love and kindness (i told mum this in different words). There is no love, kindness or respect in Anna, and if there is you can't see it, it's like she demands respect but won't give it, to anyone at all. If she doesnt get her way, then all hell breaks loose.
So anyway I told my mum "i have autism too mum. you can't use autism as an excuse for the rest of her life. Females, especially where we live, will not tolerate these accusations and comments and she will get knocked out, instead of saying 'she has autistim' teach her what shes doing is wrong" all she said to that was "well, that's a life lesson" but I don't think it should get to that point? Just teach her while you can before you regret it?
Now i know no one is the same, i know no autistic brain is the same, i know we say inapproriate things and we dont know the meanings sometimes etc. But i dont think using it as an excuse is okay? Its as if they've got the idea of autism in their head and now they dont have to discipline or teach her whats right from wrong? Anyway, I'm always the bad guy according to my parents, or am I? You tell me, I dunno. I'm used to always getting the blame so I sometimes I wonder if I actually am the AH? đ¤
Edit; I love my siblings, all 3 of them. Regardless of what has happened between my brother and I, or my sisters and I, I will always love them. I miss my brother, when we wasn't intoxicated he was the best person ever, intoxication is his life now and he's not the person I used to know. But just showing you how much love I actually have for my siblings, I would do anything to save both my sisters from this cycle.
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2024.05.14 15:04 gorgo_nopsia 2 people think my mom is xSFJ. But I donât see it. Help please!
I think my mom has Se, Ni, and Te.... however, two people on my previous post believed she was xSFJ (but didnât elaborate why). What do you guys think? Please explain why you think yes or no.
NEED TO BE PRODUCTIVE + BUSY - Absolutely cannot relax without doing something productive first, even on the weekends.
- Once told my cousin (who worked 5 days a week 7am-5pm) that she should look for part time shifts on the weekend since she has all that free time. I legit thought she was insane for believing that.
- I often don't tell my mom when I have an off day because otherwise she would expect me to still be productive otherwise.
NEED TO BE THE BEST VERSION OF HERSELF - Always keeps an eye out on how she can self-improve and be better. Be it aesthetically, financially, lifestyle-wise, health-wise, etc. She especially pushes it on to me. This also includes education and career, always pushing me to aim for better positions and get more degrees.
- Her favorite topic is finances. Always wants to know how she can live comfortably now and later. But this also causes her lots of anxiety.
UNSOLICITED ADVICE IN STEAMROLL KIND OF WAY - She's very quick to help give advice to someone, but it's often unsolicited and also quite forceful. Instead of suggesting it gently, her wording is more like "you should do this, then tell them that, you have to also do this or else it'll cause you trouble." She means well, I just don't think it's appreciated or welcome
- Also does not realize that her advice is unsolicited. Which is ironic because she expects emotional support and sometimes lashes out at me if I just give advice, yet she does the same and doesn't realize.
- Really reminds me of Leslie Knope from Parks and Rec for this trait.
DEFINITELY JUST KNOWS THINGS - Showed my mom this korean tv show, Fantastic Duo, where several contestants perform together and the artist of the song picks one to sing a duet with. Within legit 5 seconds of it starting, my mom pointed to one contestant and said "seems like she'll get picked" and she was right. I was shocked. I showed her another clip and she also immediately pinpointed the right person.
- When I asked her how she knows, she said she always has been able to know things like this without explanation. According to her, it just comes to her suddenly.
SOMETIMES SEEMS UNSURE WHAT TO THINK - My mom has strong opinions and beliefs, and often cannot be swayed. A little stubborn. BUT there are times where it seems like she doesnât have a strong opinion (or one at all), and then if I express leaning one way she will strongly agree with me and take on that belief.
- Not out of insecurity or âjust becauseâ, but it feels like she was on the fence with no strong opinion and then once seeing points made that she isnât against, she will strongly agree and believe in it.
VERY ANXIOUS ABOUT THE FUTURE - This might be an excessive amount for a function, but she's constantly anxious and she very easily spirals. She'll be fine one moment, then if I bring something up, she'll immediately spiral and won't stop ruminating about it even though I said it's fine and not a big deal.
- Also constantly worries abut making the wrong decision. Even if she made the right decision, she'll sometimes be like "What if we chose the other decision?" The reasoning for this seems to be more that she's considering too many perspectives and cannot decide what the overall right choice is.
- My perspective of her anxiety is that nothing can get her out of the muck. If I give her objective reasoning, it only temporarily relieves it and I can see it. She'll firmly say "yes you're right" with relief, but you can tell she still only says it tentatively compared to her usual self.
- Continuously repeats topics and points over and over within one conversation. Or she'll say ABC, then we move on, then a short bit later we come back to the conversation and she'll repeat ABC even if I provided moral support and logical reasoning to try to relieve her thoughts. Her repetitive points on her pain points go nowhere and is also never solved.
FIERY, AMBITIOUS PERSON - Always been hot-headed and fiery, both in temper and passion. She has this aggression in her to want to get things done. Very Type A kind of person.
- The kind of person to thrive off of negative feedback so she can be like "I'll fucking show you"
- Constantly comparing herself to others like "oh this person has good traits, I should be like that too" or "this person's trait is bad, I know now to not be like that."
- The kind of person to say "there are no stupid questions" but then you ask one and she'll say "use your fucking head, what a stupid question"
RARELY SEES HERSELF IN THE WRONG, BUT EVENTUALLY SELF-REFLECTS - Self-explanatory, but she very rarely sees herself as wrong. She is stubborn and will hold steadfast to her opinions and beliefs in the moment. I don't think I've ever heard her apologize, and especially not admit she was wrong in the moment unless there's concrete proof.
- That said, if you give her time to brood about it, she'll come around and admit you have a point. She still won't apologize, but she'll say it in a "I get it, objectively it's right" kind of way.
- E.g., she got PISSED at me a couple years ago for not making a big deal on mother's day. Then some months later, she and I were talking and she said "I even told the friend that we have to be understanding of our own actions. I got mad at Gorgo about not celebrating mother's day once, but then I later realized I can't blame her. We never celebrate holidays and I don't do anything big for her birthday either, so why should I have expected her to celebrate mother's day?"
- It was like an indirect admittance through an irrelevant conversation she had, something she never brought up with me.
CARES TOO MUCH WHAT OTHERS THINK - Yes to what society thinks, but I mean this mostly with personal relationships. If she has to make a decision that benefits some people and not the others, she worries way too much how the unfavored people in the group will be impacted.
- One time we ordered custom clothing from a store, and we weren't very happy with the end result. The tip amount was up to us, so I stood firm on a certain amount. My mom objectively sided with me, but emotionally wondered if we should give more because even though the result wasn't good, the store owner still went through all that trouble.
- I feel like this goes hand in hand with her anxiety.
USED TO BE SPONTANEOUS AS HELL WHEN YOUNGER - My mom has all these wild stories of her when she was younger. She'd be traveling across the country with her friends by train, then randomly she'd get off at a stop and be like "okay I'll see you guys back at home! I actually wanna get off here" shocking her friends. And this was pre-cell phone times too. My mom today cannot fathom how she never got kidnapped or something.
- Once, she got tuberculosis and had to be hospitalized for some days. Once she was discharged, she went straight to the salon, got her hair done, and went to the club to dance lol
- Definitely was the leader of her friend group and everyone always relied on her for fun and plans
- She no longer is like this. Could be due to growing up, could also be due to the after effects of depression she had a few years ago. More of a homebody now.
KEEN EYE FOR AESTHETICS - I've always believed that if my mom led her ideal life, she'd be an interior designer. She has an eye for things, and I don't know how to describe it.
- One time, we were figuring out what to do with this blank spot in my room. We fiddled around for a bit, then she had an idea, went downstairs, hauled up the large ottoman we had and placed it there. Looked great immediately and has been there ever since!
- I don't remember this, but she has told me how everyone would compliment the outfits she'd pick out for me, or the younger girls at work would compliment my mom on her outfits. And genuine compliments, not fake ones, as she says.
MISC. - Not into fantasy/sci-fi. You will never catch her watching that genre. She likes political movies, action, based on true stories, spicy romance.
- Not into deep talk. Very much talks about strictly relationships/people, productivity/how to be your best self either internally or externally, etc.
- Very spiritual and religious (buddhism).
Will answer any questions you may have. Thank you!!
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2024.05.14 14:40 haicaho China's defense policy and potential conflict
I've skimmed through some posts about Chinese military affairs, and there are just too many errors and biases. Let me give you an introduction to the current Chinese military and military strategy from the perspective of Chinese themselves. (My English is not very good, so my expression may not be fluent or clear enough, and there may even be mistakes).
In 2015, the top command believed that the previous military management and command system lacked clear division of functions and specialization, making it difficult to efficiently coordinate operations among different services. It was also inadequate for coping with high-tech warfare between major powers and high-intensity localized conflicts under conditions of informatization. Without improving the command structure, the PLA's combat capability would be severely restricted. Subsequently, the PLA began implementing reforms. The goal of the reform is to adapt to informationized warfare by assigning military management and operational command to different services and theaters, allowing each theater and service to focus on its own development and thus enhancing the overall combat effectiveness of the entire military.
I. Overall Strategy
China's defense policy is defensive in nature. The government stated in its 2019 white paper, "We will never threaten any country or seek any sphere of influence." It pursues a policy of not being the first to use nuclear weapons and does not participate in any military alliances. This is different from the Soviet Union. Although both are socialist countries, China, unlike the Soviet Union, does not seek global military presence or pursue "world revolution." For us Chinese, ideology is not important; reality is what matters. Under the central strategy of "centering on economic development," China's defense strategy is destined to be defensive in nature.
II. Potential Conflict
The only region where large-scale conflict could potentially occur in China is Taiwan.
The military is working to build Anti-Access/Area Denial (A2/AD) capabilities to prevent U.S. military intervention in China.
Although foreigners like to refer to China and Taiwan separately, this is incorrect for both the CCP and the Taiwanese authorities. Regardless of whether it is the "People's Republic of China" or the "Republic of China," Taiwan is a province, because they both claim sovereignty over the entire territory of China. In their dealings with other countries, they all demand one or the other. That is where the âone Chinaâ principle comes from, that is, you can only choose between the Chinese Communist Government and the Taiwan authorities.
This situation stems from the civil war many years ago, in which the Kuomintang government lost all internal provinces except Taiwan Province. You can see today's conflict between Taiwan and the mainland as a continuation of that civil war.
The CCP has always tried to achieve true national unity, even nominally (one country, two systems allows Taiwan to retain its military and all political systems unchanged, only requiring the Taiwanese authorities to recognize themselves as a local government, while the CCP is the legitimate central government). However, obviously, this has not been smooth. The Taiwanese authorities are unwilling to accept only becoming a local government, even nominally.
If you were to ask me whether the mainland would attack Taiwan? My answer is I don't know. As long as Taiwan is still called the "Republic of China" and remains within the framework of "One China," not seeking to become a "Taiwan Republic" hostile to China, then armed conflict is unlikely to occur. As long as Taiwan nominally belongs to China, its ideology and system are something we don't particularly care about. If the "Republic of China" in Taiwan seeks to become a "Taiwan Republic" and willingly becomes a forward military base for the United States against China (Taiwan is only a hundred kilometers away from the mainland's heartland, and even deploying short-range weapons there would pose a huge threat), Then there's a possibility of war.
However, both sides have been calling out to each other for 70 yearsâwhether it's the CCP aiming to reunify Taiwan Province or Taiwan planning to counterattack and unify China. So, who knows?
This is an analysis from a historical and geopolitical perspective. "Freedom" and "democracy" are good things, but this is not the real conflict between Taiwan and the mainland. That's all I'm going to write, and sometime I can talk more about how the Chinese view U.S. military actions and the strategic goals and approaches taken.
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2024.05.14 14:13 Godzilla-30 Does anyone remember the incident of February 23rd, 2014? [Part 2]
It is a man, old and scraggy. He wears a jacket that lays over the red plaid button shirt and blue jeans. He wears an old baseball cap and a pair of glasses. He yelled something to Dad, holding his hands up like he was pleading, although we couldnât hear it over the truck engine. They talked, but we couldnât hear what they were saying.
âHey, what are they sayingâ, I asked, while petting Mattâs hair, calming him. The old man then put his hands down and came close to Dad in a cautious way. They seem to start having some kind of conversation.
âI donât really know, hopefully, something goodâ, Mom answered. They talked for a little while, with daylight beginning to disappear, giving us a sense of dread, and making me more worried about what weird creature was going to show up. Eventually, the old man turned and pointed toward what I think is the northeast. They then shook hands and walked back to their respective vehicles. âWhatâs going onâ, Mom asked as Dad got into the truck.
âWell, our new friend here invited us to dinner at his farmâ, Dad replied.
âDoes he have supplies?â
âWell, he says has supplies for us to make the journey.â
âShould we even trust him? We just met h-â
âRelax, heâs just an old man, living alone at his farm, feeding his cows. What could go wrongâ, Dad countered. The old man then entered the truck that was running and drove slowly, expecting us to follow him.
âAlrighty then, but we have to be cautiousâ, Mom said, with her suspicions of the old man. We then followed the old truck along the dark, frozen road. It just feels like something is going to show up along the road, but nothing happened. Matt did eventually stop crying, but he is still upset about the Joe escape thing.
âWhere are we goingâ, Matt lamented, with the prior series of events in mind.
âI guess somebody is offering us dinnerâ, I answered.
âWhy canât we just go home?â
âItâs only going to be a stop, like a hotel. After that, we go to our new home, I guessâ, I said, taking another look at Matt and cradling to comfort him. âItâs going to be okay.â I stared out into the darkness. I looked to the sky from the window and I faintly saw something in the clear, dark sky, lit up by the waning moon. They were brilliant, green auroras that defy the bright moon, dancing across the sky like ribbons in the wind. The truck eventually took a right-hand turn into another road, with us following suit. I can see a bright, orange light emerging from a patch of tree. When we passed by, it seemed it was a house, at a farm, burning in a massive flame.
âI guess those people arenât so, uh, luckyâ, Dad said, taking a quick look at it before looking at the road. Passing by, we went on and continued to follow the old manâs truck. We passed onto another intersection until he turned into a driveway to what I believe to be his farm. Going into the driveway, I can see an old house, along with a dilapidated farm further away, barely visible by the headlights. The old man parked by the house, where there were a few other trucks there. We parked alongside the truck and we got out into the cold, near-silent night.
âWelcome to sanctuary, where all are welcomeâ, the old man bellowed. This is the first time Iâve heard his voice. Matt was the last to get out of the truck, slowly and clumsily climbing out of the truck.
âWhatâs your nameâ, my Mom politely asked the old man.
âOh, I guess your husband didnât tell ya. My name is Steven, but you can call me Steveâ, the old man said, with some crackling in his voice. âI am very proud to host a dinner for you and your familyâ, he continued. âWhatâs your name, maâam?â
âOh, my name is Janiceâ, Mom replied, quite pleased at his politeness.
âHello, Janice, and what are their namesâ, Steven asked, pointing to me and Matt.
âThatâs my daughter Kate and my son Mattâ, Dad said to Mom.
âOh, what wonderful names for a couple of beautiful children you haveâ, Steve grinned. âCome, it is dangerous out here.â We followed him to the house, which looked like it had seen better days. He entered through the double-set door, the first a solid door and a screen door behind. Entering the house, it smelled like what youâd expect, old man. Looking onto the floor is made of glossy wood and walls with cracks, likely caused by the earthquake. It is dark in there, lit by candlelight from many candles, yet itâs fairly warm here. I donât know why we went into the house, but Dad was right, Steve is just a lonely, old man. Matter of fact, there seems to be nothing wrong here, other than the cracks in the walls. âSorry, the power went out. Had to resort to the candles. I knew my wife would come in handyâ, Steve explained as he took his coat off. âOh, supper will be ready right away. Had to use the fireplace to cook. Also, can you take your boots off?â We took our boots and set them aside. We went into what seemed to be a living room, with dusty old-style furniture.
âSo, where do we sitâ, Mom asked.
âOh, well, follow meâ, Steve commanded, leading us to the dining room, with a long, wooden table and six wooden chairs, along with their corresponding old-fashioned plates, glasses and cutlery, lit up in the candlelight. We noticed that everything on the table was covered in a thin veil of dust. âMy apologies, the recent shocks dropped a bit of dust on the tableâ, he explained as he noticed us looking at the plates and moved into another room nearby. âTake your seats if you like.â We all settled onto the chairs, and blew off our plates of the dust settled there.
âWhen will we eatâ, Matt impatiently said.
âOnce Steve comes out with the foodâ, Mom answered. Matt sat there with a tired look on his face. Dad seemed to be in a better mood than before and it looked like he wanted to start a conversation.
âHey, should we talk about somethingâ, Dad asked. I then see Steve with a bowl and a silver plate.
âHere we go, may not be much, but at least itâll fulfil the soulâ, Steve said, smiling when he served us mashed potatoes and meatloaf. âSo, shall we pray?â That came unexpectedly, as we are not too religious, but we were in his house and gave us shelter and food.
âSure, we can do thatâ, Mom said and we all bowed our heads and put our hands together. Steve cleared his throat
âThank you, Lord, for this good food to feed the soul in these hard times. I shall pray, in the name of the Lord and Jesus Christ, that these hard times shall be over, so we can get on with our lives. Amen.â We raised our heads and grabbed whatever food there was onto our plates. âOh, thereâs no gravy, so we have to deal with bare potaters and meatloaf.â
âOh, not to worry. Thank you for the foodâ, Dad thanked Steve. We began to eat the food once we got it sorted.
âSo, what brings you hereâ, Steve asked.
âWell, there is an evacuation order in effect for this area, so we had to go to Reginaâ, Dad explained, with Steve taking in every word. âSo, we came from Strasbourg, we tried going south towards Regina, but we hit an obstacle in the way and we had to take another route, leading us here.â
âAnd we encountered a few odd things along the wayâ, Mom added.
âHuh, interesting. What do you guys think is going onâ, Steve inquired.
âBy the things we saw, we have no idea. Dinosaurs, devil dogs, hell pigs, the whole deal. I shouldnât forget the earthquake. They told us a pipeline leak caused by the earthquakeâ, Dad clarified to Steve.
âHmm⌠is that soâ, Steve wondered. âWonder what I think is happening? The Rapture is happening. Do you know how the Bible tells us of the end times? Good people sent to be with God and his kingdom, the rest here to suffer the Hell unleashed by Satan.â By this point, he was beginning to rant, but we couldn't stop it as we all began to feel tired and powerless. âSo, the Devil will send his demons in the form of these illusions so that they can torment the sinners. It is happening, it is-â Steve manically continued as I drew towards blackness and his voice becoming less coherent. My vision is now all black.
I saw those same lights, but more rapidly than before. I then emerged onto the same clear sky, but something felt different. I can smell something in the air. I can smell what seems to be chemicals in the air. Looking down, I was terrified. Dark, grey rock in the shape of ropes and folds, similar to those I saw of lava flows on a volcano in pictures. This went on as far as the eye could see. I can see no tree this time, just the cooled lava everywhere. I then walked, feeling every bump and crag. I thought I walked forever until I heard a rumbling sound and woke up.
I am in total darkness. It is cold and it smells like cow manure. I tried to move my hand, but it seemed to be bonded behind my back by a rope. I tried to move my feet, but they were also bound by rope to the legs I tried to speak, only to realise my mouth was agape by a cloth in my mouth. I heard shuffling nearby but I could not see. It was then shone in light when Steve entered the door, holding a candle, revealing all of us in the same situation. I then can see what we are in. We are in that same wooden dilapidated barn we saw earlier and seems to be more damaged than the house, wood creaking can be heard.
âThese sedatives are more effective than I thought. Maybe I should use them more oftenâ, Steve smoothly explained, like heâs some kind of agent and began pacing. âWonder why you are here? Well, I wondered the same thing to myself, why didnât God take me to his heaven? When I first heard of the government telling us of those evacuation plans, I thought it was that, a leaking pipe. I began to notice things I couldnât believe myself, at least at first. Earthquakes, weird creatures showing up, people disappearing, the whole spiel. I connected the dots. The Rapture is happening, for sure, but why me? Why was I the one left here on this Earthâ, Steve calmly ranted, pacing around the barn, but it seemed to sound crazier and angrier the more he paced. âI thought I had lost my way. Iâve been unfaithful to God and his son. But, I realised that God always has a plan and he left me on this Earth to serve a purpose. I wondered what my purpose was until I had a moment.â He then stopped in place and calmed down. He turned to look at Mom with accusing yet crazed eyes.
âIâm supposed to keep the sinners here in line, to earn a place in Godâs kingdom, or suffer in Hell. I know you are a sweet woman, Janice, but your treachery with Satan is over and I am going to do whatâs right.â Mom then looked at all of us, with assuring eyes like that of an innocent yet caring mother we all know knew. I began crying and trying to speak through the cloth, but I was helpless to watch by. âForgive me, Father, for what I am going to do.â He then pulled a knife from his pocket and plunged it into Momâs neck with no mercy. I looked away once he did that, trembling, with tears pouring out and my vision glazed and I fell limp. I could see my brother tearing up, but he did not look away. I can hear Dad behind me, with his screams of agony and anger covered by the cloth. It felt like I was in slow motion, taking in every moment.
I then heard the chair, screeching as Steve dragged the chair containing Momâs lifeless body towards the door, leaving behind a trail of blood. I couldnât bear to see my mother like this. I shut my eyes very hard and hoped it would go away. The door then shut, leaving us alone with a candle, fearing what would come next. I stared at the candle, seeing it dance in the flames like a woman dancing in the darkness. Is this how itâll end, I thought. End up dying to this sick man? My Mom was killed in front of me. I sobbed with that thought, then I began to think about the inevitable death of me. I hope thereâs something after I die. Maybe Iâll see Mom again.
It was silent for a while, nearly no sound other than our moans. Dad seems to be fidgeting at the back of his chair, rocking it slowly. Looking past him, I shuddered at the glistening pool of blood, where Mom was last alive, could be my fate. I then see Dad release his arms from the back of the chair and remove the cloth from his mouth. He silently stood up and bent down to untie his legs from the chair legs. He then went to me and removed my cloth.
âH-h-how did you do thatâ, I silently wept, fearing that Steve would show up at the door and kill us all.
âMy binding is loose. The old man probably took a liking to meâ, Dad whispered. âI should remove your binds.â He untied them, releasing me, doing the same for Matt. âNow, we need to be quiet.â We then walked, quietly, along the painfully creaking wood in the near dark, following the blood trail, glistening in the candlelight. We cringed and dreaded each sound we made and watched the door in case it began to creak open. A few silent steps later, we made it to the door and we slowly opened it so as not to make any noise. What was revealed to us is nothing new, other than the blood trail continuing in the snow directing towards the back of the barn. âOkay, Kate, Matt, you guys run to the truck.â
âWhat about youâ, I sobbed.
âDonât worry about meâ, Dad responded, giving me his keys and forcing them into my hand. âIf Iâm not back in a few minutes, leave. Donât look back, take care of your brother, okay? I love you, no matter what happens.â He then kissed me on the head and ran to follow the blood trail. We quickly walked towards the black truck, stranded there for maybe hours. Getting closer, freedom is getting closer. When we got to a fair distance to the truck, I heard footsteps behind me and, the next thing I knew, I was knocked over to the ground into the hard snow on my face. A hand turned me over to give me a glimpse of a crazed Steve, his eyes wilder than before.
âOh, yes, trying to escapeâ, he bragged. I looked at him, frozen in fear, like a deer in headlights and he caressed my face with his bloodied blade. âYou do have a pretty face, but Iâm afraid you are just one of Satan's creations, made to pull me to lust.â He then raised his knife in the air when a familiar side emerged, out of the blue.
Joe came and bit him in the arm that was holding the knife. Steve screamed in agony the moment he realised what happened. He shook Joe off and stood up to stand his ground. I stood up as Joe hissed and walked around the crazed being he wounded, not in fear but in aggressiveness. âIs this one of your pets, demonâ, Steve screamed as Joe came in for another attack, but Steve countered that with a slash to the snout. Joe then ran away, whining, into the darkness. This sequence of events gave me the chance to enter the truck on the driverâs side. I had some trouble starting it, besides this is my first time driving a truck.
Steve menacelily walked towards the when Dad came barreling and tackled him to the ground. Dad was on top when he went limp. I finally put the keys in the engine turned it on and backed out, with memory serving me the instructions on such a vehicle. Steve pushed Dadâs body and stood up, but by that time, we left the farm.
âTurn back, we have to get Dadâ, Matt cried, but I was very emotional, accepting what happened. I felt that, without my parents, I feel⌠useless.
âDadâs deadâ, I screamed at Matt and he began gagging uncontrollably in tears. I began to feel sorry for him. âSorry, I, I donât know.â
âItâs okayâ, Matt sniffled. âI guess Mom and Dad are dead anyways.â It was silence for a few more minutes, tears welling in our eyes.
âHey, our parents are in a better placeâ, I said, trying to make the situation positive.
âBut we are stuck here, without them? Donât we deserve to go to a better place?â
âDonât say thatâ, I huffed and I paused for a bit. âI know we are in the, uh, right place now. Let me tell you something, once we get to Regina, I will take care of you, no matter what life throws at us.â
âWhat about Joeâ, Matt asked.
âHeâll be fine. He probably found his girlfriend already.â
âHey, donât you have a boyfriend?â
âI, uh, I donât have one. That I know ofâ, I spoke, bringing me back to Sam, remembering that sheâs the only friend that I ever knew, and I left her. Without her, I felt alone, no one would ever relate. I began to tear up. âI donât have any friends. I am alone,â I sobbed.
âWhat do you mean? Iâm your brother!â I looked at Matt, and smiled, happy that he acknowledged that we were in this together.
âThank youâ, I thanked him. I slowly stopped on the road, just to hug Matt hard, crying my eyes out. We then heard what sounded like an elephant in front of us. We looked up to see a walking snow-covered brown fur wall with four pillar-like legs in front of us. Its curved tusks gleaned in the light and the eyes reflected in the light. The furry trunk waved around like a searching snake from a tree. We both knew what it was.
âHey, look at that, a woolly mammothâ, Matt said, excitement running through him. At this point, we werenât surprised.
âYep, that is a woolly mammothâ, I added. The mammoth turned to us on the road, seemingly confused about where it was. It looked at our truck and seemed to growl, like an elephant. We are starting to realise this thing is becoming aggressive.
âUh, should we moveâ, Matt asked. I remembered hearing something about standing your ground in case of an encounter with an elephant. I hoped it would work for a bigger, furrier version of one.
âNo, we have to stand our ground.â
âBut, itâll attack u-â
âTrust me!â I then honked my horn and it backed up. It then rushed, then stopped, a mock charge. Eventually, it moved out of the road, disappearing into the darkness. We sighed in relief.
âThat was closeâ, Matt sighed. I then continued to drive in the night, headlights leading the way. The road is bumpy, as noticed by every ditch and peak we hit, but surprisingly, Matt was fast asleep. I began to get comfortable driving and used to the road by that point. It was silent for a while until we hit a smaller intersection. That is when the truck shut down, completely and stopped. I tried the gas many times but with no effect. There is no light, nothing. It is near-darkness here, shone only by the moonlight.
âShitâ, I yelled, desperate to turn the truck on without much success. Matt woke up, confused.
âWhat happenedâ, he yawned.
âThe truck turned itself off. I canât get it back onâ, I fretted and at that moment, Matt was just as panicked as I am.
âWhy?â
âI-I donât know. One moment, we were driving, another it just-â, I quavered, when I heard something rustle in the distance. We stood still, hoping whatever it was didnât find us. I looked around, hoping to see something in the moonlight. I then see a long, walking animal. It looked like some sort of alligator at first, except for a dinosaur-like head. Once I strained my eyes to the darkness, my fear levels rose as I could see it walk on its hind limbs, with its forelimbs dangling nearly touching the ground.
It was wandering around on the road when I heard a near-crocodilian growl at Mattâs side of the truck. Another of those creatures appeared, seemingly looking into the window like a hungry bear, giving us a chance to see its scaly head. Its exposed alligator teeth gleaned in the light like knives, but more terrifying was the eye. Its serpentine pupil shone brilliantly in the light like eyes in the dark. It then ducked down, gave a hiss, and moved towards the other one. A few more showed up and formed a group.
âWhat should we doâ, Matt asked. âShould we stay?â I looked around, hoping for another way to escape them without them noticing. I further strained my eyes and mentally mapped out the area. There is a cemetery on my right-hand side, a grain bin storage yard on my left and a series of trailers on the other side of the highway, which is ahead of us, from the storage area. There, I see a series of white, storage buildings, something we can go to and wait it out inside.
âOkay, so slowly open the doorâ, I instructed Matt. The click of the doors opening cringed us. We looked at the group, but there was no response from them. We then, as slowly as we could, opened the door and stepped out. Still no response. Matt then quietly ran to the other side, towards me. âOkay, we are going into the storage yard and go to the other entranceâ, I said, pointing to the other right-hand corner. I wanted to get as far away from these things as possible before making a safe crossing. âThen, we cross the highway on the other side, run into the buildings and stay there for the night. Are you ready?â
âI guessâ, he whispered, looking at me in fearful doubt.
âWe are going to do thisâ, I whispered back. We then silently ran over, having to rely on our night-adapted eyes, to the corner, walking past the bins. We made it and nothing behind us so far. âWeâre good so far.â We then crossed the road and noticed nothing. We noticed a tanker truck, leaking some sort of fluid across the road. I easily recognized it as fuel, based on its distinctive, sickly smell. I wouldnât be worried about it if it werenât for a collapsed light pole that is somehow still flickering with electricity near the area where the fuel would be flowing. We quickly avoided the fluid when I froze to see the group of the walking alligators, running towards us. âRun!â Matt tried to run, but one of those things appeared and clamped its jaws at the back of his neck. He yelped in pain and it took him down to the ground. âMattâ, I yelled, helplessly watching as the creature tore into him.
Matt reached out his arm before the others came to him, then a flash of fire came. At this point, I knew what happened, but I couldnât even think before it exploded. It blew me towards the building, far away. I was knocked out for a few seconds before I regained consciousness, groaning in pain on the ice. I noticed something especially painful just below my chest. I reached towards the area with my hand. I pressed on it, more painful than ever and raised my hand, only to see blood, brightened by the fire. I realised I was wounded, maybe by shrapnel made by the explosion.
I looked toward where the truck was and all I saw was a blaze. Those things werenât there, at least. I also noticed something else, too, thereâs no Matt. I tried to look around for something, some sort of sign of my brother within the fire, but I saw none. I then wept, realising I had failed. I have failed to keep him safe. I have failed to give him a better life. I failed him as a sister. I couldâve done better. The thoughts poured in as tears glazed my eyes. At that moment, I failed to look around me.
I noticed a dark thing beside the blaze. I thought it was Matt, preparing to greet him back, even though I knew he couldnât survive the explosion. The image became clearer and clearer as I noticed it was one of the walking crocs that, glazed by the fire, was coming towards me.
âJust kill meâ, I screamed, preparing to painfully die to meet my maker. The creature was about to attack me when something large, silent as the wind, came charging and clamped down its massive jaws, filled with conical teeth on the hapless creature and raised it. The crocodile struggled before going limp with a crunch within its strong jaws. The big, dark and scaly monster that it is towered over me and is as long as a bus, possibly longer. Its large legs are a contradiction to its small arms that hide beneath its scarred, bulky body.
It turned to look at me with an oddly bird-like expression, revealing in the firelight numerous scars from battles I could never know and looked at me with its beady bird-like eyes, breathing out wisps from its nostrils like a dragon in the cool air. I recognized it as a creature I know too well, a T. Rex. I breathed heavily and sickly, looking at the thing, nearly expecting me to drop the body and go after me. Instead, it simply walked away, carrying its bloody prize with it, and steadily retreated into the darkness.
I then lay down in agonizing exhaustion on my back, thinking of the next step of action like I'm on a suicide mission I would never come back from. I looked in the direction of the graveyard and had one thought. I guess I am dying. a graveyard will do. I struggled to stand up, noticing my blood-soaked clothes and felt a broken left leg. I grasped my wound, limping step by step and enduring the sharp pain while shaking in the cold. Every step I took, I remembered all the memories, good or bad, that I had with my parents. My brother. My friends. My family. I eventually reached the cemetery and slouched at a tree.
âGuess Iâm joining you, guysâ, I said, speaking to the snow-covered gravestones, only to hear something. A familiar sound of chirping emerged and, lit by the blaze, it was a sight I can hope for. âJoe, what are you doing hereâ, I depressingly cheered as Joe went to me and curled up in my lap as if he were a cat. I noticed the new-found scar he had on his little snout, but I paid no mind as I petted him. âI guess you came back. Thank you so much for what you didâ, I thanked him, not expecting such a loyal creature would be with me, comforting me, to the end, like what my mother used to do when I was a newborn. I heard another noise, this time a deep rumble.
I thought it was another earthquake coming, but it got louder the closer it got to me, becoming more animalistic only felt small vibrations I barely felt. Joe stayed put, oddly enough, as T. Rex, different from the first one, came. It walked towards us until it stopped short of us. It began to produce a low-pitched, bird-like purring, attracting Joe. I realised something, that this T. Rex is Joeâs parent. He joined the rest like him, whom they showed up and all chirped around.
The grown Rex then brought its snout closer to me, not to kill me, but to look at me. It did not reveal its teeth and was still purring. I put my hand out and its nose came close to it. It rubbed it against my hand and started to pet its cold, scaly skin as it breathed through its nose and put it on my chest. I rested my head on it before it pulled away. It gave out a hiss, but I knew it wasnât that of a threat, but more of a thank you for bringing its small, sometimes immature, child home.
That gave me relief, as it felt like I at least did something for once. They walked away, along with Joe, towards the darkness amongst the gravestones in the cemetery. I glimpsed one last desperate look at Joe before walking beside his parent. I looked up at the sky and I could see all the stars, twinkling, and the dancing green auroras. I began to feel limp and felt the cold embrace of death coming over me, tears pouring out of my eyes. The sky then grew brighter and brighter, the stars faded into the light and I could see my family welcoming me to a new home. It then slowly went black, darker than a cave.
You would think this is the end of me. It wasnât, or else I wouldnât be writing this right now. I eventually woke up in a hospital in Regina. I was told I was rescued by a team that transported me while I was in a coma. The doctors said I was very lucky to be alive, as the shrapnel narrowly avoided my vital organs. After that, I was adopted into a new family, but I was only with them for a couple of years before finding a new job and moving out.
As for Sam, I donât know what happened to her. I would like to think she is safe, somewhere else. As for my family, I think of them all the time. I was in a depressive period right after that. Eventually, over the years, I accepted that they were gone and went to a better place. For Joe, I would like to think he is all grown up, like his parents, and becoming the king of the jungle. I hope we meet again.
As for the evacuated area, it wasnât some pipeline rupture that caused an evaluation, but an anomaly, with the exact reason not known. There are excuses for the claims of weird stuff going on in there, from disease to chemicals, to eventually a previously unknown geological event, but I saw through it all.
You may ask how, it's because I've been there. Take it or leave it, this is the story I have. As the decade came by, cover-ups were made to hide it, even walls were put around it. Since the incident, the exclusion zone grew from a mere 80 kilometers in diameter to 460 kilometers in diameter, emptying entire cities of the likes of Regina and Saskatoon. I had to move to North Battleford, by the recommendation from the same government covering it up, making me think that time will tell before the floodgates of truth open.
The anomaly didnât have a name initially, however, over the years, everyone agreed on one name in particular: The Saskatchewan Anomaly.
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2024.05.14 13:51 SharkEva [Final Update] - AITAH for passing out during a family gathering meant to introduce our new baby?
I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/user posting in AITAH Concluded as per OOP 1 update - Medium Original - 5th May 2024 Update - 6th May 2024
1 New Update Thanks to u/Small-Bodybuilder160 for finding the update Final Update - 10th May 2024
AITAH for passing out during a family gathering meant to introduce our new baby?
So, recently I(27F) had a beautiful baby girl with my husband(29M). She's my pride and joy, I love her more than I love myself. But, taking care of her has taken its toll on me. My husband promised the work would be 50/50 when we agreed we wanted children, but I don't feel that's being reflected by his actions this past month.
It's gotten to the point where I can't even ask him to wash her up without him saying something along the lines of, "My paternity leave is short, I want to make the most of it by relaxing a bit. I'll help you out later." And I get it. His paternity leave is only 6 weeks while mine is 16 weeks, but my nether regions hurt like a bitch for a better part of two weeks after the birth and all he could do for me was occasionally burp her.
Now, my baby girl has gotten to a phase where she doesn't want to sleep. She'll sleep for an hour, but then she's up and back to crying and I have to get up and try to soothe her. It's been happening for a week now and I've gotten so little sleep that I'm nodding off while eating or doing tge laundry and stuff. Saturday was the month anniversary of my daughter's birth, so I decided to gather both sides of the family to meet her. (They hadn't met her prior because a)I wanted to rest as much as I could and b)I heard somewhere that you shouldn't be taking babies out and about when they're fresh out the womb cause they're more prone to illness then).
So, we had this gathering at my mother's house and all was well. Everyone was cooing over our baby, there was food, people were catching up or meeting for the 1st time. It was nice. But, I had gotten about 3 hours(generous estimate) of sleep in total the past week and I was starting to feel the effects of it. I was feeling lightheaded and clammy, but I didn't wanna make a scene so I tried to go to a bedroom to lie down. I didn't take 10 steps before my vision completely blacked out.
I wasn't down for long, but I had fallen over which drew some attention. I explained to everyone who was concerned that I was fine and that I was just not getting enough sleep and I could see my husband visibly frown at that. They gave me some of the dessert my aunt made to get my sugar up and the party continued. I felt embarrassed about the whole thing, especially since everyone was still looking over me til we left, but it's whatever
What bothered me is my husband's reaction. When we got home, he started going off on me about how I "made him look bad" and like "he wasn't taking care of me". I was confused on how tf me passing out made HIM look bad, but he refused to explain himself and had a pity party for himself in the kitchen.
I was still feeling bad, so I decided to leave him alone and just to go sleep, but he seems to have taken that as a sign that I don't care about his feelings. He's in my ear this morning about how I just ignored him to go sleep last night and how I didn't even put the baby to sleep before leaving. Is he right? AITAH here?
Update: So I've tried talking with him, but he's been ignoring me and the baby the last three hours. I'd usually wait longer, but I'm just too tired to deal with this right now. You guys were right, I do need help with this, and he's made it very clear he's not ready to help me yet, so I'm just going to go to my mom's place. I'm currently packing. I'm so done.
Comments
sophie_Mal NTA and I canât call your husband the names I want to because my comment will be deleted. Paternity leave isnât a time to relax, itâs a time youâre helping raise the baby and spending time together as a family. CLEARLY he is not doing either of these things as A. Youâd be better rested and B. Heâd have noticed youâre exhausted. You passing out made him look bad because it was clear to everyone that youâre being left to raising your baby alone. Itâs clearly not a partnership and the AH youâre married to is turning it onto you to shift responsibility and blame. You need to seriously reconsider the relationships future and bring this up with him as it all comes down to him and his behaviour. If he gets his shit together, then things will be much better. But if he doesnât, you and your daughter deserve so much better.
awaythrowers97 He doesn't know what "paternity leave" is and doesn't really want to take care of his family. Sadly, you can't seem to shake that loser.
ArticleOld598 This deadbeat of a father and husband is using his 6 weeks to laze around instead of using it taking care of his wife & child. OP you said you love your baby more than yourself, would you want to let her grow up and think that it's normal for wives to push themselves while they're sleepless and in pain until they faint & husbands to berate them instead of worrying & taking care of them? Tell your parents that your husband doesn't help you at all & blamed you for "making him look bad". You know what else makes him look bad? Being a deadbeat father and partner.
**Judgement - NTA*\*
Update - 1 day later
Hi all, your comments were really helpful, so thank you!
Yesterday, before I could Uber to my mom's house, my sister offered to help me, so I'm staying with her instead. She's taking PTA to help me out with my girl, which I'm very grateful for. She also gave me sleep medicine that knocked me out for hours (I'm not sure if that was a good idea or not, but I slept long and well so I don't care.)
I woke up a few hours ago to tons, and I mean TONS, of messages from my husband. Like, the little app icon had 99+ on it. Here are some of the things he said(copy pasted):
- You cant just up and fucking leve with my baby
- Come back now pls let's talk abt it
- Your actually so fuvking immature wth is wrong with you we have one argument and you fucking pretend like I've been beating you why the hell did you leave????
- We can work this out like adults yet your choosing to be difficult like a little bitch
- Pls just come back we will talk and sort this out and we can go back to being happy so come back
- I miss my baby girl you can't just take her away
- What if I call the police for kidnapping??? Would that teach you wat your doing is wrong???
I would screenshot, but it says this community doesnt allow attachments, so i can't. And I know it's a bit weird to tell yall what he's been texting me, but I'm mad right now and this feels therapeutic lol. I already sent the screenshots to his mom though!
As for my baby, I have an appointment to a paediatrician for Wednesday, but for now she's on formula since my breast milk quality isn't the best for understandable reasons. My sister said she wasn't as fussy as I described, so I really think the problem is with my milk. That or my sister wanted to make me feel better for sleeping, who knows. I'll wait for the doctor's opinion.
I'm not feeling 100% but I feel a whole lot more better than before. Thank you to everyone who showed concern! I think this will be the last update since I wanna not think too much about my husband rn.
Comments
ZombieJoesBasement I am sooo glad you left and got some help and rest. You definitely need and deserve it. I still can't get over your husband's mental gymnastics here. He hasn't been a parent, hasn't helped you at all, and hasn't really spent any time caring for his daughter and only cares about what other people (besides you) think, but "misses his baby girl" and wants you to come back "so we can go back to being happy"?! Sounds like the only person who was happy was him--he got a 6 week vacation and didn't have to lift a finger. Let me guess-you were doing all the cooking and cleaning on top of caring for the baby? From what he is texting you, he thinks he did nothing wrong. He is being deliberately obtuse. To add insult to injury he calls you a bitch and threatens you with the cops. Lovely. He is a real peach. I really want to know what his mom has to say. Does she know he was mad at you for passing out?
Efficient-Cupcake247 Because it isn't about love. It is about control and image. Please keep strong. You have done a fabulous job doing what you need to for you and baby. Best wishes
blehguardian To be clear, kidnapping is not involved. Until a custody agreement is submitted to the court, either married parent is legally permitted to take their child for any reason.
Aggravating-Pipe-903 Damn, this dude is crazy. Hopefully next update itâll be ex-husband
**New Updates*\*
AITAH for passing out during a family gathering meant to introduce our new baby? LAST UPDATE - 4 days later
For all of you who wanted to know what his mother's reaction was, she yelled at him and he made that my problem. The things he's messaged me are vile. And even though MIL was mad at him and KNOWS what he's been saying to me, she still insisted that I go visit him face to face so we can work things out.
I don't really blame her. He's her son, of course she'd still want to help him, but still....With all the ways he's been threatening me and cussing me out, I really didnt want to see him, but I decided to go. Mostly because I needed the stuff that I left at our house.
I went with my sister for safety, obviously. We got there and he played with our baby, he offered to feed her (she wasn't hungry), just acting completely different from the man texting me about how much of a "heartless bitch" I am. I didn't really feel comfortable having him near me or the baby with how violent his texts were, but she's still his baby. I don't think the courts would favour him after I show his texts, but I thought I should rather be safe and allow him some form of contact before going to court. This was a mistake.
At the end of the visit, I decided I should go pack my stuff, since that was one of the only reason I agreed to come. But, I didn't feel comfortable not being there while he had my baby. Yeah, my sister was there and I trust her, but I'd rather watch her with my own eyes. So, my sister went upstairs to pack for me. As soon as she was gone, he started talking about "See? I'm good now I can take care of her." And other stuff but that wasn't the problem. Even if he became super dad, I wouldn't be able to see him the same. Not after all those messages he sent me.
I told him that and he got pissed at me. I was getting worried since my daughter was still in his arms, so I tried to deescalate his feelings. It didn't work and he started yelling at me for "being heartless" and "stubborn" and whatnot. I wasn't really focused on what he was saying, I was focused on my baby. I tried to reach out for her and he shoved me hard enough to fall back. My sister came down and tried to help, but he shoved her away too and ran to the guest room and locked himself and MY BABY in there. He refused to come out unless my sister left and i stayed behind. I can't tell y'all how scary it is to not know what's happening to your child.
It took officers almost 30 minutes to get him out, which pissed me off. Like I know they were probably trying to assess the danger or whatever but I just wanted my baby. In that 30 minute window he could've shaken her or threw her out the window or something and they were there asking him to come out like he was a child and not breaking down the door. She was fine, though, so I can't be too mad.
They didn't arrest him since "no harm was done" even though my sister and I have bruises to prove otherwise, but they held him outside while I packed my stuff. It actually bothers me that they didn't at least detain him, but there's not much I can do about it now. I don't think I'm going to go near him again. Not with my baby. I'm thinking of going to apply for that emergency custody thing yall were talking about.
This happened on Wednesday and I'm still shaken. It's really depressing, for a lack of better word, seeing how much he's changed. I really loved him and I felt he loved me too. How he's acting is crushing me. I feel deflated. My baby girl and my sister are really the only things keeping me going right now.
I'm sorry for the wall of text, it's just that texting this all out helps me feel better. But, I don't think I want to continue updating. Just know that we're splitting up. Thank you all for your support!!
Extra: after visiting the doctor, I've decided to just skip the hassle and formula feed. She seems happier with formula anyways.
Comments
JanetInSpain OMG document everything. Take pictures of the bruises. Go see a doctor and tell the doctor you just need things documented to protect yourself and your baby. File a police report for assault and both you and your sister write detailed statements of everything that happened. Then apply for emergency custody.
georgiajl38 Go to the police station and file a report for assault. Screw those cops. They didn't have to take him but the assault report should have definitely been filed. Get in front of a magistrate asap!!!
I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP. Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments submitted by
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2024.05.14 13:48 Nitros_Razril Mini Cards (from Stream)
| Taken from Stream. Translation is from Discord and via Google. https://preview.redd.it/zd7dbpvcmd0d1.png?width=799&format=png&auto=webp&s=43bcfc9e05e6130261cf650840a6c700d8c6989d At the start of a turn that you can evolve, if this is Unlimited, reduce the cost of this card to 4. Discard 2 random cards. Summon 4 different copies of followers and amulets discarded this match. Give enemy Leader the following effect: At the start of your next turn, discard 2 cards random cards. https://preview.redd.it/lnl9t0ismd0d1.png?width=808&format=png&auto=webp&s=cb92bd9bc896b8783f4beee0dd641e9b807af8b5 Accelerate: Recover 2 Defense. Summon a Magic Sediment. Invoke at the start of the turn, when 7 Stacks are consumed Ward and Storm Fanfare: Gain +X/+0, X equals the number of stacks consumed this match. https://preview.redd.it/zgb0yf1qnd0d1.png?width=812&format=png&auto=webp&s=c4c5df85aec29e128c3b3b8c472e88fbc88e3258 Fanfare: Put card below into your hand. Evo: Reduces Cost of card below by 1 (1 random copy random). https://preview.redd.it/acnmavp4od0d1.png?width=814&format=png&auto=webp&s=e0d3284951b214ce58c5e690598284fed2fdd605 Heal 2, Draw 1 card. If followers have evolved 3+ times: The next time your leader takes damage, reduce it to 0. Followers have evolved 7+ times: Summon Heavenly Aegis. https://preview.redd.it/1u9val5kod0d1.png?width=822&format=png&auto=webp&s=6fa7860e31d0e3db14b35a8edd822d18f091fc17 Commander During your turn, whenever an enemy card is destroyed, deal 2 damage to the enemy leader (up to 5 times) Fanfare: Put card below into your hand and subtract X from it's cost. Summon X of the card 2 below this to enemy side. X equals the number of times you evoled this match. https://preview.redd.it/e2g5sqb3pd0d1.png?width=813&format=png&auto=webp&s=cfcd74ec65a5394a02c973ef126b8c2e6d928ddc Select 2 enemy cards and destroy all other enemy cards. Evolve card above. https://preview.redd.it/iww2xopjpd0d1.png?width=810&format=png&auto=webp&s=f5d7c9af091e13207367440ba4664362a31ce343 Officer and Ignores Ward Cannot attack card two above this. Last Words: Restore enemy leaders defense by 2. https://preview.redd.it/2yycv3gwpd0d1.png?width=811&format=png&auto=webp&s=c1b4d5aa722334abc068cdf7dbbc490c6163a560 Machina and Rush Strike: Put a random Forestcraft follower form your deck into your hand. Recover 1 PP. Fanfare: If you played two other cards this turn, evolve this follower. Evo: Same Strike effect but can attack twice. https://preview.redd.it/wtrvgaecqd0d1.png?width=817&format=png&auto=webp&s=78ca9981c4e91dc3d8d6bbe2ebced3f652c7a80d Ward. Fanfare: If followers evolved at least 5 times this match, put card below into your hand. Fanfare: If any evolved followers are in play, evolve this follower. https://preview.redd.it/j9d84mupqd0d1.png?width=812&format=png&auto=webp&s=20ed2755709d876ca245696de05a4b1280749482 Deal X damage to a random enemy follower. Give card above Storm. If X is at least 10, give card above +4/+4. X equals the amount of times allied followers have evolved this match. Note: There might be some mistakes with the translation. Wait for the official one to be 100% sure what a card does. submitted by Nitros_Razril to Shadowverse [link] [comments] |
2024.05.14 12:59 KabrTheFearless Camper Entry Report: Isaac 'Shepard' Sheppard
Camp Half-Blood Official Camper Entry Report #JDB7YC
First report is based on initial interviews with Camp Half-Blood staff. NOT FOR CAMPER VIEWING.
Name | Age | D.O.B | Height | Weight | Hair | Eyes | Parentage |
Isaac Sheppard | 16 | August 16th | 5'10" | 109kg | Chestnut | Hazel-Green | Heracles |
Origin
Camper Isaac Sheppard, preferably referred to as 'Shepard' simply has detailed his younger years of upbringing as more typical of what we consider mortal activities. Unaware of his lineage, he was raised by his mother, Jennifer Sheppard, in the boroughs of Hartfort, Conneticut without recorded incident. Shepard hinted towards his mother knowing more but quickly halted further questioning, insisting that she wouldn't have hidden facts from him. Shepard dictated mortal schooling had no outstanding events save his performance in physical sports. Regular disciplining regarding a laxidase attitude at any sports, despite exemplary performance in nearly every field. Shepard stated the only one he liked the sound of was archery but the school's facilities did not support this outside of occasional yearly excursions to more advanced facilities.
Satyr Protector Member 38821 was tasked with investigating a phoned-in anonymous report submitted to Camp Half-Blood of a teenager presenting with physical strength exceeding that of even typical demigods. Whilst this tip-off left no further detailing beyond the city of Hartford and to look for excessive physical capabilities, the suspected caller is believed to be Jennifer Sheppard. Protector 38821 was able to determine Isaac's school and infiltrate his class in order to breach the topic of introducing him to the reality of being a son of the god Heracles. Days later, Hartford Police Department reported arson at the home address of Isaac and Jennifer Sheppard. Isaac presented statements of 'scaled individuals' fleeing the scene but mortal services dismissed these as distressed claims of a teenager in shock of losing his mother. Protector 38821 was able to retrieve Shepard from intervening social services and was in the process of transporting them both to camp via train when they both came into contact with individuals described by Shepard as 'guys but with these glowing eyes and armoured...or metal?'. For reporting's sake, contact is assumed to be hostile automata of origin unknown.
Protector 38821 and Shepard were able to reach Long Island whilst under extended assault from these automata, roughly 7 hours later according to statements from Shepard though accuracy of these estimates is lowered due to stress and high fatigue from protecting both himself and Protector 38821. Shepard openly admits that without the help of campers from Camp Half-Blood, he would not have survived the final stint to camp boundaries and his fate would have matched that of Protector 38821.
Powers:
- Legendary Strength AKA 'Unstoppable Force' [Minor]
Isaac displays one of the highest levels of strength and stamina known of half-bloods. He has been recorded being able to lift up to 600 lbs. (or 272.16 kg) and can punch through concrete. Thankfully Isaac is aware of this and seems to have been informed of this by his mother for a significant portion of his life and can control this, despite not knowing of his bloodline.
- Electrical Resistance [Minor]
First displayed during Shepard's extraction to camp, he shows a resistance to the harmful effects of electrical attacks such to a degree that he is able to withstand badly interacting with small appliances.
Shepared has yet to display any further abilities. We do not yet know if this is an intentional action of obscuring them or whether Shepard simpy does not have any more abilities.
- Herculean Fortitude AKA 'Immovable Object' [Major]
Isaac possesses a complete immunity to mental and emotional power. This includes reading his mental or emotional state. Those who attempt to influence or read his mental state report the sensation of attempting to read a blank slate, an immutable, unreadable presence some have found disconcerting. His presence/location can still be detected by these powers if a user were to attempt to locate him via these abilities. As a side-effect of these powers, he cannot be positively influenced or 'buffed' by other powers, excluding healing magic.
Shepard is capable of summoning a weapon related to his godly parent, though his personal experiences have shaped the typical club that his siblings are capable of spawning into something a bit...scrappier. Whilst not as lethal as a Celestial Bronze weapon, the makeshift maul is entirely capable of lethal strikes when fuelled by Shepard's enhanced strength.
- Alternate Vision [Domain]
Beginner Tier - Shepard describes this as an overlaid indicator in the form of a customisable crosshair over his own field of view that will show Shepard where an arrow will land if it is loosed at his current draw and aim. By drawing the string further and aim differently, so too will the indicator adjust. Shepard has determined quickly that this does not work with melee or thrown items.
Intermediate level - Shepard partially draws strength from his grandfatherâs domain here, completely unable to control the winds beyond the air in his lungs but he can observe them. When the HUD is up, he can determine wind-speed and direction, as well as how that will impact his shot with the aiming indicator being able to now compensate for wind.
Master tier - As Shepard masters this power over time, judging distance, aim, and after regular usage, he is able to use the HUD as a range finder to within a metre's precision.
- Enhanced Skill Proficiency [Domain]
Isaac shows a increased proficiency in physical activities when he wishes to put the effort in in, particularly those that Heracles was renowned for such as wrestling, fighting, archery, and overall shows of strength.
Personality
Shepard's time at camp is only just beginning, with a greater report on his tendencies and personality still pending until he has shown his hand and can be interacted with. First impressions are guarded, the boy still getting to grips with this introduction of a new reality. Perhaps we may be able to discern more once he has completed what we believe to be a more introspective assessment, determining who he is in Camp Half-Blood and how demigods fit into what is to him, a new world.
Notes
- No discernible reason behind the dismissal of his first name, 'Shepard' simply being a misspelling of his last name that he has stuck with.
- Shepard appears to enjoy what he calls 'tinkering', idle adjustment and construction of functionless trinkets or pieces from mechanical parts. Notions of some kind of link to Hephaestus have been dismissed but camp officials may wish to nudge him towards campers with a proclivity of crafting to engage in Shepard's curiosity or ease any initial worries about joining camp
- Be on watch for any conflicts regarding possessions, as Shepard's rushed retrieval has meant he has arrived at camp with only the clothes on his back. Initial talks with him have shown he is very protective of his 'home clothes'. Whilst he has taken to camp clothing without incident, Shepard may be harbouring thoughts of loss beyond just his mother.
End report. Begin report JDB36T on camper activities.
But the full tale of Shepard is a story we'll hear later. For now, we cut to the boy himself...
Shepard stood out in the open, placing himself accidentally at the centre of camp with his back to the Big House. His two saviours had to depart to carry on with their own business and so the clueless teen turned slowly to attempt to take in the enormity of where he stood, and what that meant for his tomorrow. Hopefully someone noticed the kid not in camp clothes, scratching his head and epitomising the term 'paralysed in indecision', and could offer kind words. Or even better, directions to the bathroom?
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2024.05.14 12:40 Specialist_Bake6514 Vapiano P3: Italian Food Made in Germany
| The kitchen is on fire. Welcome to the final part of the Vapiano story where the tables are turning. In the first two episodes we followed Mark Korzilius' journey from setbacks to founding Vapiano, a groundbreaking restaurant concept, highlighting its fresh ingredients, dynamic atmosphere, and data-driven operations that drove rapid success. While achieving initial profitability and garnering attention from industry giants like McDonald's, Vapiano's global expansion has led to stellar revenue growth. However, it has also resulted in the emergence of numerous side projects (or distractions), operational challenges, increased costs, significant investments, and a notable accumulation of debt. This underscores the prioritization of top-line growth over profitable growth. We will continue on this thread and see how the story ends, but I would encourage you to read part one and two for better context. Vapiano P1: Italian Food Made in Germany (substack.com). Let's dig in. Before Going Public We are now in 2015 and the year is a disaster for Vapiano's PR department. Employee time stamps are being manipulated, endless overtime for employees and high turnover in managerial roles are reported; mice in the kitchen and even rotten food allegedly found. The company is confronted with allegations of exceeding working hours among trainees in an article published by Welt am Sonntag, while the same outlet accuses Vapiano of manipulating punch times. The auditing firm PwC is commissioned to investigate the allegations and finds that there is no systematic approach but rather misconduct by individual employees, a mistake thatâs being corrected. Internal however, investigations into stamp times are carried out regularly now and beyond its obvious reputational impact, this sucks up valuable management time and attention. In the summer of 2015 CEO, co-founder and investor Gregor Gerlach, who has been running the group since 2011 is stepping down and Jochen Halfmann is taking over. A new Vapiano People Program with an App is being developed with the aim to better interact with customers that will incorporate innovate features such as mobile pay. The German website sees a launch of new magazine to further promote the brand and there is now a full inhouse blogger and Instagram team being installed. In October the company buys seven restaurants from original co-founder, former co-investor and ex-president previously responsible for internation expansion Kent Hahne (2x Bonn, 3x Cologne, 1x Koblenz and one in Cologne thatâs under construction). This package of Vapiano restaurants is very successful and generates net sales of more than 20 million euros in 2014. Hahne opened his first Vapiano restaurant in Cologne in August 2006 and in 2015 with his company apeiron AG, Hahne operates six L'Osteria franchise restaurants, a direct Vapiano competitor, and two self-owned restaurants GinYuu. Then in November of 2015, the next public relations bomb goes off with allegations regarding the company's quality standards. The company immediately investigates the issue through internal and external specialists but finds no evidence of any quality issues. Nevertheless, knowing that the group is now being closely watched, the companyâs already in place hygiene standards are being reinforced. Additional audits and inspections are performed nationally. Further, all Vapianos worldwide are being audited twice by the partners SGS Institut Fresenius and SAI Global. Auditing software is purchased to simplify the implementation of the audits and the resulting measures. Apart from the external examinations, there is a food sampling plan in place being performed continuously. Again, all of this sucks up costs, management time and attention. With all these tumultuous developments the companyâs growth engine is undeterred. Revenue grows by a whopping 50 million euros to 202 million euros, an increase of 33%. Impressive. While average spent per customer increases in all countries, the number of customers per day in Germany decreases by 3.3% partially due to the negative press towards the end of the year. Five own, four JV and 19 new franchise restaurants are added that year to the group, the total number of own managed restaurants grows to 51, there are 31 JVs and 84 franchises which bringing the total to 166 Vapiano restaurants. Global restaurant sales are now above 400 million euros. But while revenue grows by an astronomical 50 million euros, operating profits, alarmingly, shrink again. Gross margins are staying perfectly healthy above 75% but operating costs keep growing disproportionately fast. The Companyâs outstanding debt jumps by almost 30 million, close to 85 million euros by the end of the year. With operating profits at 9.5 million euros, alarm bells should be going off right now. In Q4 of 2015, new CEO Jochen Halfmann introduces Strategy 2020. The new strategy includes five essential points. One, profitable growth in the newly defined core markets of Germany and Austria as well as in the UK, Netherlands, France and USA. Two, operational excellence through strict âbest practiceâ management. Three, further development and digitalization of the concept considering guest feedback. Four, greater focus on long-term employee retention and five, building a modern and sustainable IT landscape. Soundâs good on paper but letâs see how things pan out. Vapiano's investments (capital expenditures) that year are primarily directed towards new restaurant openings, renovations of existing establishments, and share acquisitions in other Vapiano restaurants from franchisees or JV partners. A significant portion of funds is allocated to the digitalization of the guest experience, including the development of a new app scheduled for market release in 2016 and the implementation of a time recording system across all group restaurants. The world's first standalone Vapiano restaurant with a delivery service that year is built in FĂźrth, Germany. The company keeps expanding its presence in both inner-city locations and international markets, such as Shanghai, China. To finance all of this, the group has its own operating cash flow which comes in at 18 million while capital expenditures are 26 million euros plus 14 million for acquisitions. The funding gab is filled with 26 million euros of new debt and a seven-million-euro equity raise. At that end of the year and after the equity raise Gregor Gerlach (through his AP Leipzig GmbH & Co. KG entity) holds 30.1%, Hans-Joachim and Gisa Sander through their Exchange Bio GmbH hold 25.5% and the Tchibo heirs, Herz through their Mayfair Beteiligungsfonds II GmbH & Co. KG hold 44,4%. But for the first time the restaurantâs concept that was so successful to date is being questioned. Some customers are starting to mislike the operational flow of the concept itself. If you want pasta, you must queue for pasta. If you want pizza you stand in a different queue. A small side salad, yet another queue. "You spend more time carrying trays than an actress in Berlin-Mitte. The audience in the pasta limbo can only consist of people who have worked for an insurance company for a long time and, like Stockholm syndrome, they can no longer get away from the industrial canteen feeling," writes TV host Beisenherz provocatively. While overly harsh in his assessment he's not entirely wrong judging by customers venting their frustrations in forums and social media channels. It isnât uncommon for those who ordered pizza to have already finished eating while there is little movement in the pasta queue. Long term that doesn't go down well, QSRs competitors like LâOsteria are handling this process differently, with much success. https://preview.redd.it/6cas01oked0d1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=2da6e0b4bc0e07dbee558de412feb414cd598d4a Tipping Point Where are now in the year 2016 and things start to deteriorate visibility. Perhaps not for the lemanâs eye but any business minded observer can see that there are problems under the hood. Yes, revenue grows yet another whopping 50 million to almost 250 million euros but half of that growth, comes from acquisitions of restaurants that the group didnât already own 100%, which is now being fully consolidated within the groupâs accounts. Here is a concrete example. In the past, Vapiano SE, the groupâs top holding company held an indirect 50% stake in a French subgroup via the subsidiary VAP Restaurants SA, based in Luxembourg, and included this as an associated company in the Vapiano SE consolidated financial statements using the equity method. Due to the acquisition of additional shares in September of 2016, Vapiano SE's indirect share in the French subgroup increased to 75%. This means that Vapiano SE takes control of the French subgroup, which is therefore included in the groupâs financial statements as part of the full consolidation. The revenue from the acquired subsidiary now recorded in the consolidated income statement amounts to 12.8 million euros. While thatâs great for the top line, the loss of the fully consolidated entity equates to 0.2 million euros. Yes, you are buying revenue, but there are losses attached to them, not profits. A similar case is the Swedish entity that runs eight restaurants with revenue of 11.5 million euros but has losses of 235 thousand euros. So much for Strategy 2020 and âprofitableâ growth. That year the groupâs operating profits are absolutely tanking, halving to 3.5 million euros. Operating profits are now a mere 1,4% of revenue. Remember original founder Mark Korzilius who talked about operating margins of 25% to 28% at the restaurant level? Yes, there are overhead costs for the organization that sits above the chain of restaurants, but operating margins that low indicates a course correction is needed. Whatâs telling is that in the annual report, in the management discussion section, the company starts talking about EBITDA as a proxy measure of profitability, rather than operating profit or net income. This wasnât the case in the years before. Is this window dressing for an upcoming IPO? EBITDA is short for earnings before interest, tax, depreciation, and amortization. How can you measure profitability of a restaurant chain that absolutely and unequivocally needs capital investment to maintain its restaurant operations, the very source of cash generation, by simply excluding this maintenance charge (depreciation in the income statement)? Vapianoâs own annual report talks about the fact that existing restaurants must be rejuvenated from time to time and that new interior designs have to be implemented every few years. These things wear and tear, they go out of style, kitchen equipment breaks and needs replacement. This business absolutely needs maintenance capital expenditure, why anyone talks of profits before these maintenance costs is beyond me. Fun fact: in the previous annual report EBITDA is mentioned seven times, mostly around restaurant acquisitions and financing, not however as a profit indication for the group. In the new annual report, EBITDA is mentioned 28 times. Maybe itâs just me but belated Charlie Munger liked to call EBITDA: bullsh*t earnings. When in doubt I stick with Charlie. Interestingly, EBITDA for Vapiano keeps growing while operating and net profits keep falling. Operating cashflow for the group that year is about 21 million euros, but capital expenditure is 30 million and acquisitions for subsidiaries another 20 million. To finance these expenditures another 28 million euros of debt and 16 million of equity is raised. Net debt rises above 130 million euro. The operating cashflow of the group before any capital expenditures is 21 million euros. I am not sure free cash flow would be significantly positive after maintenance capex is paid out; itâs not broken out so we canât be sure. Granted, I am not on the ground during this time, and I am not in the board room, I am simply reading whatâs in front of me, but to me this is starting to look like a distressed situation. Regardless, the following year the company goes public. IPO Where are now in the year 2017 and its Vapianoâs first year as public company. The companyâs annual report reads the following âSales revenue, like-for-like growth (LfL) and the earnings figures EBITDA and adjusted EBITDA are used as the most important financial performance indicators for controlling operational business activities.â The very same report however also says: âThe majority of the group's investments regularly go towards opening new restaurant locations and modernizing existing restaurants. The latter are differentiated into regular replacement investments that occur during ongoing operations (Maintenance CAPEX) and fundamental investments in the renovation of a restaurant (Remodeling CAPEX). On average, a restaurant remodeling takes place nine years after opening.â It says it right there in their own report; every nine years a remodeling is taking place. Remodeling and updating is not cost free, so why exclude depreciation charges which reflect capital expenditures? I understand that perhaps you would want to strip out one-off opening costs, thatâs fine and fair, but donât go overboard. The number of restaurants increases by 26 (previous year: 13) to a total of 205. The increase consists of 27 new openings and one closure. Group revenue grows to an astonishing 325 million euros but here comes the shocker, operating profits turn negative to 25 million. Fine, strip out foreign exchange losses of 3 million, IPO costs of 5.8 million and new opening costs of 6.1 million and you still have 10 million euros of operational losses. All the while the debt load of almost 130 million hasnât materially changed, so those operating losses are before a six-million-euro interest payment. 184 million euros are raised through the IPO of which 85 million go to the company. This money is earmarked for further expansion as the group has ambitions to almost double the footprint to 330 restaurants by the end of 2020. The company is currently not profitable on an operating basis, and still wants to expand aggressively? I donât get it. The remaining 100 million euros of the IPO money raised is distributed to co-founder Gregor Gerlach and Wella heirs Hans-Joachim and Gisa Sander. The family office of the former Tchibo owners GĂźnter and Daniela Herz with a 44% stake, donât sell a single share. After the IPO, 32% of all the companyâs shares are now in free float. One year later, in 2018, things get even worse. Revenue grows to 371 million, but operating losses mount to 85 million euros, thatâs before interest expenses of 9 million. Even the beloved EBITDA figure turns negative, meaning the operating business before any expansionary or even maintenance capital expenditures is loss making. All regions are experiencing significant deterioration in their earnings profiles. Like for like sales are down 1% across the board. Thatâs revenue, not profitability. The question naturally arises: is the Group approaching its natural saturation point here or this operational by nature? The operating cash flow is now 9 million while financing cost are close to 7 million. That leaves 2 million for maintenance capital for 74 own restaurants and 76 joint ventures ones. Describing this as financially tight, would be an understatement. Things are not looking good at this point. Yet the company still grows restaurants by 26 new sites. 64 million euros are spent on acquisitions, new openings, and maintenance costs, financed through a 20 million-euro equity raise and 72 million of new debt. The Company now has net debt outstanding of over 160 million euros. After the equity raise and by the end of the year 2018, Mayfair owns 47.4%, VAP Leipzig, Gregor Gerlachâs entity owns 18.9% and the Sander couple own 15.5% of the company. Yes, the Sanders and Gerlach may have taken 100 million euros off the table, but they still have substantial skin in the game. Plus, Mayfair hasnât sold a single share and instead injects more money into the company through the equity round. The stock has now fallen from its IPO price of 23 euros per share to under 6 euros by the end of 2018. Something must be done here. And indeed, there is pivot in strategy and a hard push for change. At last, the management team abandons its aggressive growth plan and curtails new openings significantly. Additionally, the team wants to run a thorough analysis of weak locations to then either discontinue or sell sites. In Europe, the operating focus will be put on corporate restaurants and joint ventures in major cities to ensure the ideal size and location to match the respective demographic target group. Outside of Europe, the franchising business is being expanded and at the same time a consolidation of the existing corporate and joint venture markets is being sought. All future investments will be reviewed to achieve higher rates of returns on new openings. Investments are also being made in the renovation of older restaurants. The goal in the future is to also open smaller formats, like Mini-Vapianos (less than 400 square meters) or Freestander at prominent transportation hubs outside city centers (currently in FĂźrth and Toulouse) to cater to individual location requirements, and to enter new partnerships. I am not sure why management hasnât stopped all expansion altogether, bringing the ship in order first, getting profitable, clean up, all hands-on deck before considering any further expansions whatsoever. But again, itâs easy to comment from the sidelines; maybe they saw white spaces that would be covered by competing concepts if they werenât moving fast and aggressively enough. Although pushing internationally means competing with local players such as Jamie's Italian, Prezzo, Pizza Express, Wagamama, Nando's and many more which brings in its own dynamic. Management also aims to enhance guest satisfaction. This involves refining operational processes, reorganizing the support center, and refocusing on the core offering: providing fresh and high-quality Italian food at affordable prices for a broad audience. The group also aims to reduce waiting times, especially during lunch, while also improving the evening atmosphere. There is even what I would call an evolution, away from Vapianoâs original concept, reorientating the customer journey. The ordering flow is being changed, offering guests synchronized preparations of all dishes while eliminating wait times at the cooking stations. The open show kitchen remains, staying true to original mantra of freshness and transparency but now guests can choose their preferred method of ordering through a mobile app, using a digital order point (kiosk), or by personally placing an order with a waiter. Guests can still freely choose their table and are then informed about the complete preparation of their order through a pager or their smartphone. This is a substantial deviation from the original concept, but a needed one. The group is also exploring and implementing the expansion of take-away and home delivery services but only at suitable locations, not universally across new openings. I am not sure why home delivery is even a priority here; it adds operational complexity. Itâs better to clean up shop first and get back to the basics before adding new complexities. To be fair management does try to simplify. There are 49 different permanent dishes on the menu and additional 10 seasonal ones. Customers can choose from eleven different types of pasta. There is simply too much choice, and it makes orders complicated. The company announced to slim the menu down to its most popular and typical Vapiano dishes. Thereâs no need for an Asian salad at an Italian restaurant. "We have to go back to the roots, i.e. classic, honest Italian cuisine" says COO Everke. Regardless, in November of 2018, the supervisory board pulls the plug on CEO Jochen Halfmann and replaces him with Cornelius Everke. Everke himself has just become COO five months ago. Since 2017 he was responsible for international expansion. From 2011 to 2017 that role was filled by Mario Bauer â put a pin in that name, heâll play a key role in the groups fate later. Then nine months later, in the middle of 2019, Cornelius Everke quits. He essentially concludes that his skillset and experience in the areas of internation expansion is no longer needed in the foreseeable future. To put it differently: Vapiano has moved from a growth story and has become a restructuring case, and other skills are required for that job. In June of 2019 Everke says the following â(weâve) made a bit of a mistake when it came to foreign expansionâ. No sh#t. Vapiano postpones the presentation of the 2018 annual financial statements three times in the spring of 2019, citing negotiations over an urgently needed loan of 30 million euros. Itâs not until the end of May that a binding loan commitment comes through from the financing banks and major shareholders. We are now in August of 2019 and the corona pandemic is just around the corner. Supervisory board chief Vanessa Hall takes over as interim-CEO and things are unravelling. Visitor numbers are declining; originally, it was planned to sell the US business but halfway through the year the buyer cannot come up with the money. But not all restaurants are performing poorly. The group's poor figures contrast starkly as an example with the experiences of the Swiss-German franchisee, who runs six restaurants. The Sodano family in Switzerland pays Vapiano a royalty of 6% of sales for the use of the brand. Enrico Sodano explains in an interview that they operate largely autonomously from the licensor. If an âaccidentâ were to occur, he could immediately replace the Vapiano sign with Sodano, he says. The family concluded the rents and contracts with employees and suppliers independently. The Sodano family have six locations in Bern, Basel and Zurich, around one million guests every year and 350 employees. Things are going well on the ground. The delivery service theyâve built is offering them a second income stream. Expansion into Winterthur, St. Gallen and Lucerne are being planned; small locations with 150 to 250 square meters and an attached delivery service. Originally, Vapiano restaurants used to be huge but for such a large restaurant to be profitable, 800 to 1,000 guests per day are needed. Thatâs possible in medium-sized cities, but not in smaller towns which is why the Vapiano group now also supports smaller formats. Back to our corporate drama. The 2019 annual report would be the last report the group files. By the end 2019 the outstanding debt of the company is at an astronomical 450 million euros. Revenue has grown by another 7%, produced by four net new openings through two JVs and two franchise restaurants but operating losses come in at 317 million euros. That sound like an absolute shocker at first but depreciation and amortization charges are 345 million, so that operating cash flow is actually positive but unfortunately capital expenditures and interest payments are so large that they are eating up all of the companyâs operating cash flow. Then in the beginning of 2020 Corona hits with full force and the world shuts down. As a result of the measures to prevent further spreading of the virus, the group is forced to cease all global business operations (except in Sweden). While all these shutdowns are happening, the group is the middle of negotiating with its lending banks and main shareholders. There are additional financing needs for restructuring measures, even without a pandemic happening in the background. The situation is so dire that the company starts pleading to the German government to roll out the package of financial help more quickly. Unfortunately, itâs to no end. The rapid closure of restaurants and the resulting lack of operating cash inflows in conjunction with the additional financing requirements, lead to the companyâs final knockout punch. In April of 2020, the Vapiano group officially files for insolvency proceedings. The end of an era. New Beginnings Because of the pandemic, the majority of the group's subsidiaries in Austria, the Netherlands, Denmark, the United States, Sweden, and China also file for insolvency or seek liquidation. The US business never gets sold in the end and is wound down. In the summer of 2020, significant group divestments occur, including the sale of 75% shares in the group's French subsidiaries, shares in franchisor companies, Australian subsidiaries, German subsidiaries, associated companies, self-managed restaurants in Germany, and insolvency-related sales in the Netherlands, Great Britain, and Sweden. The buyer of the Vapiano brand and one of these bundles of Vapiano restaurants is company named Love & Food Restaurant Holding, a consortium led by Mario C. Bauer â a name I told you to remember. Bauer was a former Vapiano board member and led the national and international expansion, opening 200 sites in 33 countries from 2011 to 2017 until he was succeeded by Cornelius Everke. Bauer didnât feel comfortable with the IPO at the time but clearly has a lot of managerial and entrepreneurial talent. The buyer consortium is an absolute A-Team comprised of European QSR top league hitters, including the founder of the Pret A Manger chain Sinclair Beecham; Henry McGovern, the founder and Ex-CEO of the giant international restaurant and foodservice operator AmRest; the Van der Valk Family that runs hotels and Vapiano restaurants in the Netherlands, and co-founder and ex-CEO Gregor Gerlach. The acquisition value is 15 million euros and entails 30 Vapiano restaurants in Germany, albeit thatâs just the purchase price which comes on top of any capital investment needed to refresh and return the sites to its former glory. Nevertheless, just as a thought experiment, if you can get each site to 2 million euros of revenue and 400,000 euros in operating profit on average, which wouldnât be an overly aggressively assumption given the companyâs history, youâve got yourself a package that can deliver restaurant-level operating profits of 12 million euros or more. Itâs not disclosed how much capex was needed to refresh the operations, just that fact that the overall investment plus purchase price was a middle double-digit million-euro figure. Stil, it probably was a decent purchase. The same consortium buys Vapianoâs French business for 25 million euros just two weeks prior. After the transaction concludes, the master franchise is given to Delf Neumann and his Gastro & Soul GmbH. Neumann is an experienced operator, and he is ambitious to revitalise the brand with new services and products. For example, instead of pizza, the restaurants will be serving pinsa - a flatbread made from sourdough, wheat and rice flour, topped similarly to a pizza. It targets a more health-oriented customer base looking for a less calory heavy option. The menu overall is expanded by including a variety of vegan and vegetarian dishes. https://preview.redd.it/kpt7ea6red0d1.png?width=1242&format=png&auto=webp&s=c9930ced85ee364e9df414547cae06b47a03fc19 Today Neumannâs Gastro & Soul GmbH operates 18 Vapianos on its own account and has 29 franchise sites, amongst other brands. By the year 2021, Vapiano operates 191 restaurants in 34 countries. This is around 50 fewer sites than before the bankruptcy. The number of branches is particularly thinned out in Germany â from 80 to 55. Nevertheless, Vapiano's home country remains by far the largest market, followed by France with 35 restaurants and Austria with 15 locations. âWe have shrunk ourselves to health,â says Bauer in the aftermath and there is no further shrinking planned. Quite the opposite, the smell of expansion is in the air again â pun intended. Not as aggressively as before and with a new menu and ordering process. Overall, the team around Bauer is filled with industry experts with knowledge and networks gained over decades who have a great track record, a long-term view, and the staying power to let Vapiano breath and finds its way back to success. The pressure of being a public company with all the associated quarterly, half-year and yearly disincentives have been removed. The menu is changed and extended with new types of pasta and sauces with significantly more vegetarian and vegan dishes available. Guests can order with restaurant staff, at terminals or on their phones and there are barcodes attached to the tables identify the respective seat. The food is brought to your table, all at the same time if you are in a group, no more annoyances with waiting in line. There is a plan for smaller, 350 square meter locations, with half the number of guests and significantly fewer staff and less set-up costs required to make the economics work. Locations that capitalize on remote work and increased demand for local lunch options, higher population density with shorter delivery routes and therefore cost-effective in house delivery services are targeted. And Bauer is testing the concept of ghost kitchens, which operate without a dining room or service staff, focusing solely on preparing food for delivery services, which for obvious reasons have a very different operational set up and footprint. Original founder Mark Korzilius however is not entirely convinced. He is not a fan of the pinsa for instance and he considers Vapiano's pizza as its cash cow, flagship product and believes that the core Vapiano proposition of Pizza, Pasta, Bar that has given the company its original success is being diluted. He instead admires the competitor L'Osteria, saying theyâve done a better job by focusing on Italian classics, especially the impressively large pizzas that sticks out beyond the plate is leaving every customer in awe. The guys who run LâOsteria are the same guys who have built Vapiano with him in the first place. Bauer on the other hand, like a true business leader, remains undeterred, stating that he is frequently asked whether Vapiano's restart was bold or foolish. He believes in entrepreneurship, franchising, in his experienced fellow partners and importantly the Vapiano concept. By the year 2024 you can find over 140 Vapiano branded restaurant in 27 countries across the globe, including locations far away from its birthplace like Australia, USA, Columbia, Chile, Bahrain, and Saudi Arabia. And why not? Italian food is, and will remain to be, incredibly popular. Vapiano offers fresh and tasty food at affordable prices in a good atmosphere. This combination of attributes should attract a lot of customers. It certainly has in the past. For more stories: WIP Thomas Weitzendoerfer Substack submitted by Specialist_Bake6514 to unpackbusinesses [link] [comments] |
2024.05.14 12:00 jeaglz Long term health effects
Former caper. Does anyone have any understanding of long term side effects to vaping on the cardiovascular system? Is damage reversible? Iâve been focusing on low intensity exercise with some sprints.
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2024.05.14 11:47 Mission_Mud_6905 How come Spider-Man doesn't have his own Telltale game?
Idk if this question was ever asked, But i kinda thought about it after seeing most of Telltale games, Like Batman, Guardians of the Galaxy and Walking Dead with the chosen main character, But i'm kinda surprised that Spiderman doesn't have that kind of thing.
Idk if it's about rights and who owns the character, But i say he deserves to have his own Telltale game as most of Spiderman's franchises with characters, Plots, Story expansions and more are so well developed while also tends to have bad sides to his sufferings. The tons of choices you can do with both Peter Parker and Spiderman depending on the actions you choose can create some strange fates of paths and consequences. Not to mention that Peter has so many girls to have head over heels for, Just imagine how you choose who will be your girlfriend and friend while eventually have to come with one choice as you can't choose both.
Then of course after making a choice it will pop a notification stating ("The Character" Will remember that). The story could start in Episode 1 where as usual Peter Parker having a straight normal school days before the radioactive spider part but more extended, Can even have a scene what Peter does when he suffocates a bit of illness side effect and have choices like go to the infirmary or go home and more. The Episode 1 can end also where Peter chase down the burglar who killed his Uncle Ben and then when reaching to that point, You get the option if you should spare and arrest him or kill him.
Especially when it comes to Peter Parker as you could make him act in a way he doesn't act like that before, Just like with Batman Telltale with a bunch of choices in interactions that can make his character act different depending what you choose. Can have a friendly Peter or a more rebelious Peter on edge.
Any thoughts?
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2024.05.14 11:42 Pussybones420 When to go to the hospital for bladder pain?
Hello
25F, 130lbs, 5â10â, no tobacco, MMJ user, hydrocodone and oxyxodone as needed, cyclobenzaprine, protonix
If you read this thank you so much because Iâm absolutely desperate and my doctors are tired of me and I think they think I only want pain meds. I donât, I just want to feel better. I have a huge stash of emergency oxycodone anyway so I barely even need them for that.
On 12/15 I fell down the stairs and hit the lower of my middle back quite hard. 12/19 I had a LEEP done, 01/06 I came down with extreme urinary issues and between then and now have been back 6 times, seen 4 specialists and have seen my PCP at least ten times for urine samples. Iâve also only been able to attend my full time job for 43 days so far this year and have no more money for copays and if it werenât for my ADA paperwork, Iâd have been fired a long time ago
Over the last two weeks, itâs been taking me up to two hours to produce urine while having a full (and very sore - mostly left side) bladder. This is infuriating. When I do end up finally feeling the need to release, I have less than 3 minutes to get to a restroom before my vision starts going spotty from the bladder pressure pain.
My urologist ordered a cystoscopy, but has been blaming my 3mm kidney stone until I begged for an ultrasound last month of my bladder. Found bladder wall thickening and bladder cyst / possible urachal remnant.
I found out what Cuada equina is today. I learned that it is very very commonly missed. I can barely walk, and at the music festival I went to over the weekend I had to use ADA for just about everything. I look completely normal so I got judged pretty hard, but I do have paperwork. I have been losing weight without much diet change and my back has been killing me as well. I feel so weak. My urine flow is so small compared to what it used to be. I had a period of time where the pain was so bad, I couldnât feel my clitoris or labia at all so sex was pointless as well, and I thought Iâd lose my relationship and be alone forever. They send me to an OB-Oncologist who said not to come back, which is why my urologist finally agreed to check my bladder.
Is it possible that all my issues are related to the cyst and thickening, or could this be cuada equina that was missed on multiple CTâs? I canât find info on bladder cysts. using retention. When is the appropriate time to go to the hospital? I can barely walk without pain meds. I urinated about 40 times on Saturday, with my usual being 10-20 times, and some days thereâs very little pain or urgency at all, but the retention is almost always there to some extent.
It almost feels like the part of my brain that controls my bladder doesnât work anymore because no matter how hard I tell my bladder to release, it just doesnât happen sometimes and I canât get comfortable after that. Iâve slept a total of 4 hours since Saturday morning and I only have one hydrocodone left. Pyridium does NOTHING except for when burning pain presents, and I canât take NSAIDS until my GI clears me due to extreme gas, constipation and bloating / belching thought to be caused by peptic ulcers. I canât walk at this point without pain meds, but the ER always releases me with the same DX of cyst and bladder wall thickening and tells me they have no clue what that means. But Iâm in so much pain I feel like there has to be something they can do other than give me fluids and monitor me for an hour or two until I can get to my cystoscopy next week.
If you have any advice for me I really appreciate it. I donât want to die but I feel the only way out of lifelong urinary pain after 6 months now is suicide. The only time suicide doesnât cross my mind a couple times is when I do end up having to take a pain pill. In March, I had to take oxy every day. I only take them now when I canât walk because the effects are too strong for me to keep my life in order while taking them every day. But this weekend I have had the most trouble walking, and using the restroom, since all of these issues began.
I canât afford any more specialists visits after my procedure, so I really wish the ER could do something for me as theyâre the only ones who wonât turn me away for not having money at this point. My GI doc actually canceled my appointment because I donât have $20 and Iâve been putting off another ultrasound because itâs $200 up front. IDK what to do but Iâm pretty sure this is how a lot of people end up on fent and heroin - if I had been denied pain meds this far I would have turned to the streets, and thatâs coming from someone who has chosen - on their own - to quit most drug related and extracurricular activities to better their life at a young age and is much happier for it.
I canât even get the ER to catheterize me when I canât urinate for 6+ hours at a time. What gives? Why wonât they run a different imaging test? They wouldnât even give me a breath test for h pylori recently and now Iâm waiting a month for an appointment I canât even afford.
TL;DR extreme bladder pain, nobody understands why, extreme difficulty urinating, ER canât do anything for me and awaiting surgery. Is there anything I can say or do to get proper medical attention or can the ER really not touch your bladder like they say? Is there a way I can convince them to admit me so I could see a urologist before my procedure? My urologist is unavailable until my follow-up and I donât think the company they work for allows them to Rx narcotics and Iâm against taking more than 1 oxycodone a week at this point but so far have been unsuccessful in getting something weaker like hydro or tramadol.
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2024.05.14 11:28 DS33333333 Should I go on Lexapro?
I am contemplating going on Lexapro. I struggle with anxiety and depression like a lot of people but itâs not like I canât get out of bed to go through the motions of my life, I just find it really hard at times but I always manage to just keep going.
My biggest concern is these intrusive thoughts that I have. I have the most irrational thoughts enter my mind and they just swirl around and around in my brain tormenting me to a point where I just canât stand it.
For example, the other day I spent several hundred dollars on some new business shirts, I tried them on at the store and felt that they fit like a glove and I loved them and I bought four of them. Then today my first day wearing one of them to work, I got it in to my head that maybe the shirt was too big (even though it looks like it fits me perfectly in the mirror and feels like it fits perfectly) however I didnât try on the smaller size at the store so how can I be sure that I bought the right size without ruling out the smaller size??? I spent the whole day obsessing over this even though the rational side of me thinks I bought the right size however I wonât be able to get this thought out of my head without going back to the store to try on the smaller size just to rule out that it is definitely too small and I bought the correct size in the first place.
It doesnât help talking to anyone about these thoughts because all they do is point out how irrational it is which I am fully self aware of however that doesnât stop how much these thoughts bother me. I have so many good things in my life that I should be grateful for but I always to find some stupid new irrational issue to obsess over. I holds me back socially as I donât like letting friends, family etc. get close to me because I donât want them to see what a lunatic I am. I just want the noise in my head to quiet down so I can just be a normal person. I am scared however of side effects, weight gain, erectile issues, the possibility that Lexapro could make things worse and then the painful process of trying to get off them.
Does anyone have a like experience that they could share? Iâd appreciate any honest opinions. Thank you
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2024.05.14 11:24 No_Muffin6344 lack of sex drive
ive been taking lamotringe for 3 years now im 19 and every since sex hasn't been the same. I can barely even remember what an actual og feels like. Recently I feel like its also made me loose interest in relationships. It's been a year since ive been seeing anyone which is very unlike me, I can't seem any interest sexually or romantically when people ask me out, even if I do find them attractive. A couple years ago I would have pursued those things. Does anyone have a tips for dealing with this, outside of lower my dose? Im really upset because this drug has really saved my life but now after taking it for so long im really seeing the side effects and its changes its made on me.
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2024.05.14 11:22 Starlit_pies Cities of the Potentate: Port Katariah
Some cities are like forests - they grow on their own, spreading towards water, rising tall towards the sun. You can see the old growth, ancient and covered by moss, the broad swatches left by the fires, the fresh saplings of the growing housing.
Some cities are like ships. Even standing still, they embark on the journey across the world. Their citizen-crew comes and goes, always building, repairing, maintaining, stitching up the sails of the marketplace awnings. And their underside is dark, slimy, encrusted with barnacles and in need of cleaning.
Some cities are planned and built. Even when the last stone is set and the last shingle put in place, you still see the ink on paper, the precise lines plotted with the ruler and compass. If you look up, you may glimpse the eye of an architect looking at their creation.
And some cities are the divine bodies, the vestiges of the power and the will of their planners, and the receptacle of the belief. In the words of Saint Vivec: They add new doors to me and I become effortlessly trans-immortal with the comings and goings and the stride-heat of the market where I am traded for, yell of the children hear them play, scoffed at, amused, desired, paid for in native coin, new minted with my face on one side and my city-body on the other. I stare with each new window. Soon I am a million-eyed insect dreaming.
Such cities are rare gems, and everyone knows their names. White-Gold, the dissected structure of Ayleid soul, circles upon circles, the mapping of heavens imposed on the island of the Earthbones. Falinesti, a slow wandering giant, the reminder of what the world may have looked in the times of the first Elhnofey. Vivec, the lie turned into the truth and held off by the love to itself.
Few of us dreamed to witness the act of urban apotheosis in our lifetime. And yet, if you go down the Niben river, you will arrive to it - the recently built Port Katariah. It is not shaped in vulgar symmetry, but neither does it follow the landscape slavishly. If seen from above, the city would look like a giant hook, puling a piece of land into the Niben River. The handle of the hook is a breakwater, terminating in a giant lighthouse.
The whole architecture of the city is massive and solid, with sloped walls, oblique angles, windowless outer surfaces of gray ash-cement. Covered walkways, blunted pyramids of the housing quarters. Dunmer may say it is a memory of Vivec's ziggurats, but in actuality, the inspiration was taken from the ancient blueprints of Reman's lunar settlement. Designed to withstand the magica storms of outer Aetherus, it serves well against the weathers of the Topal Bay. Whether it will be a seasonal rain that doesn't let up for months, or giant waves brought by the clashing currents.
The inside of the of the housing pyramids is the direct opposite of the outside. The brutal angularity is broken down into the mer-men-sized cozyness of a cave. Tilted twisting corridors, comfortable nooks and crannies, benches of thick softwood. The enchanted lanterns cast the pure untainted golden light of Magnus-Sun.
It serves not only for pleasure of the eye, but allows to bring the agriculture under the roof. The fruit-bearing plants cover the walls, with the streams of water running endlessly from top to bottom, filling the corridors with its soft melody. Each pyramid is a self-sufficient creature, taking only water and air to create food for its inhabitants.
The clever narrow window-slits of Alteration-infused crystal are not seen from the outside, but give a perfect view of the waves breaking against the walls of the city even in the worst storm. Together with the dampening of the sound - for the corridors are both designed and enchanted with Illusion to not spread even the softest echo - it creates an impression as otherworldly as any Daedric realm.
All taken together, the city is the perfect embodiment of the worship and belief of our Potentate. The contradiction thrust upon itself, a hardened ash-shell protecting the luxurious gardens. An artificial cliff, raised to meet every wave of challenge at oblique angle. The seed of the old novelty grown into the new tradition.
YgM: It took some arrogance and stupidity to choose the only place on the coast where the waves can get higher than the trees, and put the city there. And it's a boring place, with the current population of soldiers and sailors rattling in the halls built for hundreds of thousands, like dried peas in a pod.
The sensory deprivation effect of the sound dampening doesn't help either. They tell that some of the first wave of the settlers went mad and still wander the corridors, always taking just the wrong turn. No wonder drinking is the main pastime - fortunately all those fruits make a decent shein.
And I don't stand for all that architectural mysticism. 'City as a divine body', my ass. Although I'm sure the guys from Port Topal would say their city is the divine geometry of Baan Dar.
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2024.05.14 11:06 greydorothy A brief discussion of violence in Fire Emblem
Intro
Itâs not much of a stretch to say that violence is the primary form of interaction in video games. With a handful of exceptions, most video games involve guys whacking other guys, with varying degrees of brutality. Even chill games fall into this - Stardew Valley has sections with combat in them! Considering the pervasiveness of violence in video games, there has been a ton of amateur and academic commentary on the topic. However, while this is a well-established school of thought, I havenât seen people try to apply this to Fire Emblem specifically.
So, letâs do that now! In this post, Iâll be exploring how violence in Fire Emblem is implemented - what limitations are placed on violence, how it warps wider game and narrative design, and what it implicitly says and does not say. I hope this post doesnât come off as too early-2010s âmakes you thinkâ-y, but I do think there are multiple interesting things worth talking about here!
Despite the length of this post, "a brief discussion" is an appropriate title, as we won't be able to go into depth on everything. After all, video games are holistic works, so the attitude towards violence is relevant to every aspect of their design. However, I have managed to wrangle some of these threads into the following structure: first a discussion on the fundamental mode of interaction in Fire Emblem, then how stories are constructed with regards to violence, and ending with the aesthetics of violence and how they relate to characters. Also, as FE is a huge series, be aware that I am gonna be making some broad statements which may not apply to each individual plot point of every game. I actually planned to write 3 case studies around Thracia 776, Fates, and Three Houses (which have the most interesting attitudes to violence in the series IMO) which point out these deviations, but this post is way too long and full of tangents already. If people are interested, Iâll make a followup to this post which goes into them in more detail. Also also, because of the nature of this post, Iâll actually give a useful TL;DR for once:
TL;DR: Nintendo games must be fun mechanically, and they canât be
too uncomfortable narratively. If you try to provide a counterpoint by saying âoh this Kirby final boss is super dark it eats 100 morbillion galaxiesâ, you do not deserve rights. IntSys has to keep to this as a 2nd party publisher, but they also have to deal with the fact that their games are at least nominally about âwarâ (or at least they put their toes into that particular thematic pool). This conflict between making a fun video game for children/teens and the wider framing of the narrative leads to interesting narrative and aesthetic tensions.
also fun is cringe, misery is based âDo you like hurting other people?â (or The Fundamental Mode of Interaction)
OK LISTEN I KNOW I LITERALLY JUST SAID THAT I DIDNâT WANT TO COME ACROSS AS A EARLY 2010s âVIOLENCE IN VIDYA BAD :O????â PERSON BUT I SWEAR IâM GOING SOMEWHERE WITH THIS The best place to start when talking about violence in video games is to think about the primary form of interaction in said game. In the case of Fire Emblem, this is in the in-chapter gameplay. Sure, in objective terms the player moves arbitrary objects across a 2D grid which perform subtraction on arbitrary objects controlled by the computer, but this is always framed as controlling a squad of soldiers to engage in (typically lethal) combat with enemies (who are normally also soldiers). When youâre not doing this in-chapter gameplay, you are preparing for the next chapter of combat. This involves surveying the area of combat, preparing weapon loadouts, etc, however more recent entries also include light life-sim-esque elements. To summarize, Fire Emblemâs interactivity involves ordering violence as well as the preparations to order said violence.
For players, this strategic thinking is extremely fun and is the primary draw of the series! You have all these tier lists of whoâs better at killing, discussion of the maps where you do the killing, complaints about the length of gameplay sections where you donât do killing, etc. This is by design, as while I donât know the core brand tenets of Nintendo, I imagine the Reggie quote
âIf it isnât fun, why bother?â is carved into a solid gold statue of Mario in the office lobby. This then is enforced on all associated studios, including IntSys and so Fire Emblem. While I
would disagree with that Reggie quote (especially the bit where he says âIf itâs not a battle, whereâs the fun?â which is a wild statement to make about an entire medium), this approach to making games is ultimately fine, and so IntSys tailored the strategic gameplay to be satisfying to your dopamine receptors. You could analyse what the normalisation of violence even in âjust for funâ games says about wider gaming culture, but I wonât get into that here. In any case, letâs dig into a few specifics of FEâs interactivity.
One thing thatâs interesting with regard to strategy games is the detached perspective of the player. You order units and observe the resulting violence, but itâs not tactile, you donât directly swing the sword or shoot the bow or cast the spell like with action games. This adds a layer of separation between the player and what fundamentally happens, at least within the framing that the game provides. Itâs not like Call of Duty, where your relationship to the violence is very visceral, where you view everything down the barrel of a gun. OK, I probably shouldnât use a series that I have very little personal experience with (I only listen to
the supplementary lore material, so letâs talk about Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice. While youâre not directly in the driverâs seat, John Sekiro reacts to your every input with extreme responsiveness, so overcoming the gameâs challenges i.e. stabbing people is incredibly visceral and satisfying. While this violence is fantastical in nature, there is sufficient blood and explicit sword-action to clearly say âoh yeah you are violently killing all of those bozos with a katanaâ. Coming back to FE, not only are you far more detached from the violence, it is presented in an extremely cartoony manner⌠but letâs not get ahead of ourselves here, weâll get to the aesthetics later. Point is, Fire Emblem gives the viewpoint of a stoic commander, who Does What Needs To Be Doneâ˘, and not the viewpoint of an actual soldier who has to do the actual killing.
Now letâs view the playerâs perspective on violence from a different angle. Fire Emblem intends for its combat to be
relatively relaxed on the player side of things - the turn-based nature allows the player to calmly think through all of their moves, and you typically have perfect information on the enemies. The only exceptions to this are Fog of WaSame Turn Reinforcements, which are rare and typically unpopular amongst the fanbase. This leans into âcombat as sportâ, where (going back to the Reggie quote) you have a fun time picking apart a puzzle with the tools you have, and we all collectively enjoy this! This is a valid way of designing strategy games, and I like what IntSys has done. However, itâs not the only way of making these games - for example, in Total War you have to juggle all your battalions in real time whilst the enemy is bearing down on you, and the XCOM games always have Fog of War and limited information on the enemies, with you never knowing what kind of awful new monster is going to suddenly charge at you. Donât get me wrong, neither of these follow âcombat as warâ, the principle that violence should properly mimic the stress, tension and unfairness of actual conflict. Hell, neither of them are particularly mature either - Total War is the strategy game equivalent of smashing action figures together, and XCOM emulates a pulp sci-fi alien invasion story. However, the additional pressures these games have make them hew
slightly closer to actual conflict, putting you more in that mindset in a way that the clean fun Fire Emblem doesnât really do. Again, I want to say FEâs approach to violence in in-map gameplay is fine, but when all three of these franchises have an explicit narrative framing of âwarfareâ, it does make Fire Emblemâs narrative a little more⌠stretched.
Finally, I want to briefly mention the maps. To steal from a brilliant Jacob Geller video, these are
Worlds Designed For Violence. At least outside of the Kaga games, the maps you fight on are primarily designed around how the player interacts with them, i.e. fights on them. While I imagine the narrative designers and artists at IntSys are involved throughout the map design process, the gameplay flow probably takes precedence most of the time. Maps are not designed to resemble realistic places that you have to fight through, they are instead designed primarily to provide fun gameplay experiences before being dressed up by the artists to look realistic/fit the specific story beat. This is a more consistently entertaining approach to map design - heaven knows we have a lot of Kaga castle assault maps which are as fun as actually assaulting an entrenched position IRL - but this lack of friction could potentially take the bite out of the intended vibe, neuter any commentary on violence throughout the story.
You may have noticed that weâve only talked about the âin-mapâ gameplay for now, when thereâs an entire second half of these games, i.e. all the gameplay between the maps. Donât worry, weâll get to all of that, but this may fit better in:
Something something âludonarrativeâ something something (or Narrative Implications)
(To clarify, here Iâm going to talk about the wider plots and narrative structure as opposed to characterisation, as that fits more into the aesthetics of the series)
Itâs not bold to say that the narratives of games have to warp around the core gameplay structure. Especially in AAA video game production, the narrative designers usually have to take a back seat to the systems and level designers, at least outside of the initial rough outline they provide in the original game pitch. In this case, the job of the writer is to form vaguely coherent connective tissue between individual levels, setpieces and expensive pre-rendered cutscenes. This must be a very difficult job, and is probably the reason why most video game stories are the way they are. I am not privy to IntSys internal meetings, but I imagine they abide by this paradigm, trying to give a reason for why you fight 20 battles which roughly align with plot beats that were decided years ago.
Put another way, the writers of Fire Emblem must contrive a reason why the characters fight a vast number of violent battles in a strategic manner. This has a pretty easy solution - war! We have found something itâs good for, as whenever the gameplay designers decide that an extra map is required, the writers can just insert âoh no thereâs a blockade of enemy soldiers in the way, guess you gotta kill them allâ. This is the case for almost all the games and is a fair enough narrative choice, as itâs frankly one of the few scenarios where you could reasonably contrive so many battles, but itâs worth examining this in a bit more detail.
Even in the framing of warfare, there are still a
lot of skirmishes, which sometimes the narrative or tone fails to support - or at least, their presence means that violence isnât taken that seriously. Letâs take an example from early in Awakening: Emmeryn sends the Shepherds to negotiate an alliance with Regna Ferox. On the way, they are ambushed by Risen on the Northroad (1), have to fight the border guards who think Chrom is a bandit I think??? (2), and then after arriving they need to take part in Regna Feroxâs ritual combat to secure their alliance (3). These beats arenât necessarily bad, and I actually think Awakening uses these opportunities quite well: the Risen are established as a constant threat to the world (except not really in the main story but thatâs a whole other thing), âMarth'' gets more development, we set up Regna Ferox as fighty people who like to fight, and while the middle encounter is
very tenuous it does set up a funny joke in Cynthiaâs paralogue. However, I want to communicate that if the map/encounter designers need X maps between plot points A and B - in this case, needing low-stakes trials in the tutorial period - then thereâs gonna be a fair bit of narrative filler. That is to say, there must be multiple combat encounters that kinda just happen, which makes violence a lot more casual in the narrative. See also the myriad examples of âoh shit random bandits attack!â, used to have a lower stakes map, with bandits appearing and vanishing as needed. This works fine enough in the context of âcombat as sportâ, allowing your favourite scrunglo to build up a triple-digit body count, but this casual attitude circumvents potentially interesting ideas with regards violence. Taking the example further, banditry and its causes are never seriously explored, as bandits are just treated as a filler enemy (except in Based As Hell Thracia 776).
Another narrative consequence of needing so many fights is that⌠you need to
fight. That is to say, any anti-war sentiment or appeal to diplomacy in the series is fundamentally undercut by a) strategic combat being a core appeal of the series and b) narrative beats needing to be structured around fighting enemies. Itâs a struggle to have moments of diplomacy and reconciliation when you had a fight within 3 minutes of said moment, lest some people start screaming that things are getting boring. This also makes any appeals to pacifism kinda moot. Xanderâs quote about âwar badâ in Conquest is utter bullshit, as a huge part of the marketing around that route focuses on the coolness of the tactical combat and its challenge. Eirika and Ephraim can never be equal, because Ephraimâs âfighting is fucken awesomeâ is encouraged by the gameplay, and Eirika can NEVER save 11037 because we need a final boss and no-one else fits the bill.
Speaking of, in video games itâs best practice to have a big bad guy you fight at the end of the story, the toughest mechanical challenge coinciding with the narrative climax. In Fire Emblem, you have one grand final battle which decides the fate of the war and/or world, before cutting to a brief wrap-up and then credits. This is an attempt to make these games satisfying, which is fine, but this is at odds with an anti-war message (which FE often gestures towards) - that is, actual wars tend to be deeply unsatisfying in a narrative sense! Oftentimes, after a decisive battle, things just kinda keep going for a little while afterwards with casualties continuing to pile up until peace terms are agreed. In the few cases where there
is a final battle, itâs more of a formality as the decisive moment occurred months ago. See World War 1 and⌠World War 2 for examples of each, not to mention a whole host of war-related books and films. The problem with doing this in a video game is that it would require having multiple one-sided fights past the most climatic fight, which would be unfun, and we return to that fucking Reggie quote again. While video games
can effectively explore this anti-war narrative space - This War of Mine is a fantastic example - it just doesnât gel with the fun games that IntSys wants to make. I bring this up in the context of FE because Fire Emblem has such an aesthetic focus on warfare compared to other video games, so it sticks out even further. Even in FE6/FE9 where the war is effectively over in the final few maps, the enemies still remain extremely challenging, because if they didnât things would be boring.
A few minor things that didnât fit in above before we wrap up this section. First of all, in making an action packed story, Fire Emblem neglects an important aspect of army life in warfare - the âhurrying up and waitingâ. In the majority of cases, the breaks between fights is under 10 minutes, itâs just glossed over. Fire Emblem Three Houses is
the exception to this, but there itâs more framed as school life. Some people may say âwhatâs the point in having large amounts of timewasting where nothing happens in my game about warâ and to that I would say fuck you, I want to play Jarhead Emblem. Next, Fire Emblem involves fighting people AND monsters, but these targets are typically given equal narrative weight, outside of
maybe a funny line of dialogue about someone being afraid of monsters. In 99% of cases, enemy soldiers you fight have no more humanity than literal monsters. The death of any of your beloved soldiers is a tragedy with big sad death quotes, the death of those poor fuckers is quite literally a statistic which is proudly used to rank how well your guys have done at the end of the game. Finally, the limited scope of the violence the series can show limits the potential impact of scenes. In some cases, this is good as the implication is enough, e.g. the âMonicaâ scene in Sacred Stones is wonderfully grim and would be weakened by anything explicit. However, a number of other scenes are neutered by the limitations on violence. This fundamentally relates to the aesthetics of the series:
insert prozd tweet/skit here (or Aesthetics, Tone, and Characters)
Iâve been talking a lot about âthe violence committedâ, and this might have seemed a bit weird to you. Itâs a true statement, but because the violence is mostly cartoony and abstracted - bad guys disappear into nothingness, thereâs no blood, etc - itâs hard to think of it in that way. Itâs basically impossible to place Fire Emblem in the same artistic sphere as, say, All Quiet on the Western Front. This aesthetic sense was partially tech-limited in the early NES and SNES games, which was grandfathered into the more graphically complex titles, but itâs also related to how the aesthetics unavoidably warp the tone of the work. IntSys needs their games to be relatively lighthearted and unconcerned with the consequences of its violence, as one of the core appeals of these games is the charming cast of characters. As you would expect, it would be a lot harder to appreciate your goofy blorbos and their lighthearted chats about nothing if you could see the brutal consequences of their triple digit body counts. If violence was more realistic, there would be a lot less âooh I like training and/or this one hyperspecific foodâ or âI like peace, but
I guess violence may be possibly needed sometimesâ and there would have to be a lot more trauma and dourness. There are also age rating concerns, as you canât exactly sell Come And See Emblem to pre-teens. And once more, to clarify:
Fire Emblem as it exists now is fine! I like the lighthearted tone of this series, and I like the characters that reside within it. However, a few problems do arise from IntSysâs approach to violence, as occasionally they brush up against darker ideas but (due to similar reasons to the above) they can never commit to them, which neuters their potential impact. This is especially troublesome with regards to characterisation, as the little dudes are a core appeal, so if something is off that could cause problems. In a sense, at points we have severe aesthetic tension.
A fairly useful case study to see how this affects characterisation is with Mozu in Fire Emblem Fates. Mozu is a charming character, a genial country bumpkin with a bit of an edge at times, who has fond memories of her hometown. This lines up with the lighthearted tone of her recruitment paralogue, where (
checks notes) her entire village gets massacred by inhuman monsters, with her mother literally being murdered right in front of her, and she joins up with Corrinâs party because there is literally nothing left of her old life. I understand that people who experience extreme trauma do still manage to live meaningful lives, and that IntSys wouldnât want to have a character who is a barely functional traumatised mess for 90% of the campaign. However, this doesnât explain the sheer dissonance between the relatively normal and well-adjusted Mozu who quietly remembers her lost loved ones, and the fact that her village got My Laiâd a handful of weeks ago in the gameâs timeline. IMO this would work a lot better if there were a few survivors (instead of literally everyone else dying), with Mozu actively choosing to leave her old life to help others instead of being forced to leave by circumstance. This reduction in scope would mitigate the dissonance between the character and what actually happens to her. This is by far the most extreme example in the series, however Iâm sure you can think of others. My issue here is not with having ânormalâ characters, or with them suffering tragedies, my issue is the dissonance between the two when viewing the scope of said tragedies. This is just one way the series wants to get into darker territory, then swiftly backing off instead of delving into the consequences.
This aesthetic restriction also affects the potential impact of dramatic scenes in the main story, limiting what the focus of these scenes can actually be. This little bit will involve heavy spoilers for Genealogy of the Holy War and Spec Ops: The Line (I KNOW THESE GAMES ARE VERY DIFFERENT WITH VERY DIFFERENT INTENDED DEMOGRAPHICS IN VERY DIFFERENT CULTURAL CONTEXTS, SHUT UP).
Both have a very important narrative moment around their midpoints, involving fire magic/white phosphorus respectively. In each game, the deaths that occur are utterly horrific when you think about them. In FE4 the focus is on the drama of the plot twist and effects on the characters, with the actual effects of the violence being left to implication. We donât know if this was the original intent of Kaga and the team, or if this was enforced by various tech- and publisher-related restrictions, but in either case we do not see anything explicit. In any case, in Spec Ops: The Line, the horror and graphic nature of the violence is completely inescapable, and therefore forms the core of the turning point of the story. The specifics of the violence itself are crucial - the game does not work if you donât see the consequences of the white phosphorus - and it leads beautifully to the complete descent of its endgame. You may be saying âof course you couldnât show that violence in FE, itâs a kids gameâ which is true, and in any case the scene in Genealogy is very good, even without showing the violence. I imagine if we get a remake in the year 202X we wouldnât see anything explicit anyway, partially due to the publisher but also because the scene doesnât necessarily need it. The point I am trying to make is that the aesthetics form a limitation on what Fire Emblem can explore, narrative space that the series fundamentally cannot reach. One more thing, and this isnât really about the games themselves but the impressions leading into them, and how the aesthetics can affect that. Do you guys remember when the intro cutscene of Three Houses was released a few weeks before release? I do, and
I also remember the collective shock of the community when seeing the early previews. It was so drastically different to everything that had come before, and consequently was really intriguing - you can see a lot of speculation in the above comments. To clarify, I donât want to pretend that 3H is some kind of super mature ultra gritty war story, or that blood = good game, but that beginning cutscene gave one hell of a first impression. Even though the game isnât
that much darker than any other FE game, the sheer unexpectedness put people off-kilter in a kinda awesome way. Does the game actually deliver? YMMV, but I think this (and some of the later cutscenes, such as the mid-game Dimitri one) work quite well. Sometimes, a little injection of harsher violence can go a long way.
Conclusion
Frankly I donât really have a conclusion, sorry. As you can see, there are so many disparate strands, I canât possibly make one grand thesis statement. Maybe the inherent contradictions of having warfare in a family friendly video game weakens the potential end result? I guess, but I donât want to imply that what we have now is bad, as it is pretty good tbh. So, uhhâŚ
âŚ
OK, if I had to say something, itâs more about the process of making this. Having to try and think about how violence intersects with a video game you like takes you in a number of different directions. Ultimately, this process was really fulfilling for me, and I would recommend that you do the same (for FE or anything else)! Trying to analyse something you enjoy from a perspective not usually applied is pretty neat. If you guys have any thoughts (on the points above or your own), Iâd be very interested to hear them!
Also, if people are interested, Iâll try to make a few case studies. I would focus on Thracia 776, Fates, and Three Houses, as (when thinking on this topic) I found that these games were consistently the most intriguing, with the most interesting relationships to violence. This would probably take a while though, as I am gonna be very busy in June, and I probably wonât have time this month either.
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2024.05.14 10:41 smeztron What is the process for Ketamine infusion in Australia?
I live in Australia and am asking about the specific process in a clinical setting in Australia. I've had severe chronic pain for 31 years now. I've also been diagnosed with major depressive disorder. I also have anxiety. I've been through a lot of different medications over the years. I was put on Targin 10/5 twice a day, so I could go one something for the depression before attending an amazing pain management clinic twice (5 years apart due to the change in my physical condition) and got a lot out of it both times. I went from a walking frame to only needing crutches when leaving the house. I was on that for 8 years, then started the weaning process as my pain reduced thanks to more effective management. It took me about 3 years to go completely off the Targin. I didn't think that last 2.5mg dose was doing much for me, but I was so wrong. I am just not coping with the pain and my depression has taken a major downturn because I'm cutting things out of my life again to try and cope with it, so all I'm doing is working and sleeping. It feels like I'm going backwards and I don't want to go back on Targin because it took me so long to get off it.
My psychiatrist has just referred me back to my pain management specialist (from the clinics) saying they recommend ketamine infusion. It's been mentioned in the past that this was the next step for me if things didn't stabilise. I haven't seen the pain specialist yet, but I want to know more about the process in Australia. All of my reading has been about the US and more about the mental therapy side of it, not the pain side of it.
Is there anyone who has undergone ketamin treatment in AU who can let me know what to expect? -Psych said it was a 5 day inpatient process. Is that 5 days in hospital, or visiting daily for 5 days for the infusion? -Would I be able to work while undergoing it? (I'm in IT) -Was it helpful for you? (I have nerve pain and inflammation) -How long does it last? Is it something that has to be repeated every year or something? -Do you really "trip"? A lot of people say it, but I don't know what to expect there and it makes me a bit anxious tbh. -Can you claim it on Medicare or private health or do you have to pay the full cost of the drug and anaesthetist? -Any advice on what questions I should ask the pain specialist about during my appointment?
I'd appreciate any advice <3
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2024.05.14 08:28 DrippyTess [HELP] 13 Pro Max LiDAR and NFC Problems
Firstly, I would like to give you a little backstory. I got an iPhone 13 Pro Max for repair. Firstly, it has a 3cm long "yellow burn" on the upper left side of the screen, because the phone got heat there for a short time, but everything works fine on it. The front speaker was working, but I had to replace it because it was deformated. The LiDAR sensor was not working, it does not give an error when I tested it with software, but the sensor output was nothing, it did not scan anything. So I decided to buy a programmable one to replace it. An other repairer used to replace the rear camera in the phone, so I decided to buy a Tag-On Flex to programme it as well. Also, the customer wanted me to replace the back glass, the flash, the wireless charging coil and the bluetooth antenna. I replaced them and I put the parts back together, but there are some remained issues.
The first problem is with the Camera module. I did everything, the programming process went well, but the LiDAR is still not working, it has the exact same issue. I tried to programme it again, and I also checked the coneectivity a lot of time, but I couldn't solve it yet. Also the Camera Message does not dissappear, but I guess it is because of the LiDAR sensor failure.
The second problem is that the Apple Pay does not work, after the repair, I can't scan a card or pay with it either(back then it was working).
All the feautes working fine execpt these ones. The flash, the wireless chaging and the bluetooth is working properly, also the camera is functioning as expected, but I can see the difference in focus time and precision.
What would solve these problems? Do you have any solutions? Also, is there any way to make the "yellow burn" dissapper or make it less visible? I tried to put a privacy screen protector on it, but it does not make much effect.
Thanks for your help!
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2024.05.14 08:15 ctst21 Did anyone ever only have pain as their first sign of PD?
I am 29 and i have had a strange pain under my glans, to the left of the perineum for about two weeks now. The best way to describe it is that it feels like when you have a bruise and you press on it, but it's not really that painful.
I can't really feel the pain when I press on it while it's flaccid or erect. I feel it most when my erection presses against my clothes, or when i attempt to masturbate (although i have been abstaining). The pain feels like it's deep inside, somehow. I would rate it at a 1 out of 10 on a pain scale. It doesn't feel like it's getting worse, but it also doesn't feel like it's getting better. There are no signs of any curving, indentation or plaque. The erection itself does not hurt my penis, just when pressure is applied to it.
The reason I am a little worried is because I have been on a very low dose of beta blockers (20mg propranolol) for just over a year now and I read that a rare side effect of long term use is peyronies. I have no recollection of injuring my penis. However, I have noticed that I have been getting potent nocturnal erections recently and I think maybe I bruised my penis sleeping on my stomach somehow?
I have a drs appointment tomorrow morning, but I was wondering if anyone here might have any insight?
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2024.05.14 07:47 Important_Vacation_4 Difference between Deep Water and Snow Sapphire?
Looking at product images for these two lenses, they both have a similar appearance. In the majority of video reviews ive found, it appears the mirrored effect is much stronger on the Deep Water glasses, whereas the Snow Sapphire seems to let more light through, showing the colour of the base lens. Does anyone have any pictures side by side to compare or have any experience to qualify what i am seeing in the pictures?
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2024.05.14 07:46 harrys_4th_nip Norethindrone
Hi everyone! So I apologize in advance but this will be a long post.
I waited a year to get into a pelvic pain clinic in my state that I heard amazing things about due to having vaginismus (Iâm trying to get Botox but thatâs a whole other story) I also spoke with the doctor about my extremely painful periods and when I am ovulating. She immediately blamed it on my copper iud. I explained that I was having these issues before the iud and I only got it because my nuerologist needed me to stop hormone bc immediately. Before I took the pill I had awful cramps and once I stopped they were back. She did not seem to care at all. She told me I needed to get the iud out. I explained I canât, hence the vaginismus diagnosis that I got while getting my iud and the initial reason for my referral to her. I told her more of my symptoms like butthole cramps that are debilitating (sorry tmi?) she said that was because of my pelvic floor spasming from my vaginismus even though I explained it happened during cramps. She then told me I needed to take norethindrone. I explained I didnât feel comfortable taking hormones due to 1. Not knowing how I will react to them(I was even hesitant when I took the combo pill) 2. I have adhd and this is a med you have to take at the same time daily She did not care and was not going to take what I was saying seriously about my symptoms or concerns for the meds. So now 2.5 weeks into this med I am angry at the flip of a switch and I get so anxious at night, I feel like garbage about my appearance and I think the med is causing acne because that was not really an issue before. The cramps I got daily at first when I started the med around the same time and they were awful, not they are randomly throughout the day and donât last as long. I started spotting 1.5 weeks ago and every day it is getting heavier.
Has anyone else had similar side effects and also just a doctor who straight up does not listen or care? Any advice is very welcome
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