Inspirational quotes about deceases loved ones

From my Fetlife. Prepare for cringefest. Tell me your thoughts about my cringe.
Hello, everyone. I'd like to introduce myself to you.
Ever since I turned 20, I've been dreaming of becoming another woman's housewife (or, as I like to say, a "wifey"), but I've never exactly known how to make it become a reality. I've always been an extremely submissive person and life hasn't treated me very well both for being like that and for trying not to be like that. I score extremely highly in agreeableness and I take great pleasure in serving those I care for. Specifically and preferably, a woman I love and who also loves me. Today, I'm looking for a romantic, ordinary and 100% monogamous relationship with a woman, but one that includes the element of dominance and submission and the possibility of me being her full-time housewife. While she works, I take care of the house. When she comes home, I take care of her. Always very lovingly and completely given to her body and soul as well as to the household's domestic duties. In practice, I want to be the woman in the relationship. I want to go far beyond the basics such as cooking and cleaning: I want to be responsible for doing her nails, her make-up and giving her massages whenever she wants them. I want to learn to cook everything she likes to eat. Maybe even learn gardening to take care of her plants. Perhaps the origin of this is an innate need of mine to be necessary and useful to someone and I guess that is how it is.
Inevitably, I believe this relationship would also include elements of platonic worship. The reason for this is that I have always harboured an adoration for the female figure, the female energy, the female essence and the female appearance. None of this is sexual. In fact, I feel that this element of platonic worship is so strong that I would even feel uncomfortable seeing my dominating partner naked because it would make me feel the same dirty lust for her that I'd feel for porn actresses when I'd watch their movies and I feel that this would be disrespectful to her and to what her image represents to me. This adoration for the female figure is also one of the reasons for my gender transition, which began in September of 2023. I admire the feminine image so much that I want to make it a part of me. I don't like being a man, looking like a man, being treated like a man, behaving like a man and, God fobid, dealing with masculine gender roles. I have an enormous need to feminize my gender expression because that's what makes me happy.
For reasons that are far beyond my control and that may sound cheesy, I always end up seeing women whom I find beautiful to be superior to me. Not in a bad way, but simply in a kind of hierarchy where I'm below them. So, for some reason, I feel fulfilled imagining myself serving them in a completely devoted way. In a way, I can sum myself up as a human Golden Retriever in terms of loyalty, perhaps to pathological levels. Such a level of unexplored and repressed loyalty that I can easily imagine myself getting so deeply involved with the right woman and creating an emotional bond so indestructible that I would go as far as burying a body with her without giving it a second thought. It's as if there were a hurricane inside me waiting for the ideal conditions to form and destroy everything in its path to reach its goal. My goal is domestic servitude within a romantic relationship and this storm inside me will only grow larger and larger over time. I don't see much value in ordinary work as in working for a company. I only see meaning and purpose in domestic work in a relationship for and with a woman I love with great obedience, dedication, submission and gratitude. I don't see myself as a leader, but as someone to be led.
I come from a place where I suffered a lot of verbal abuse directed at my appearance for being too thin and I see that the world today is full of evil people with an evil intent who get off at doing evil things and also of people who omit themselves when they observe evil being done and end up becoming accomplices by omission. All of this makes me really want to put myself in a kind of safe space with someone trustworthy where I don't have to be constantly watching over my shoulder in order to check whether there already are vultures circling me from above waiting for the ideal moment to pounce. I look like an easy victim for predators and I've always attracted them without any difficulty, unfortunately. I am soft and highly sought by them. I want to be able, if only for a few hours, to let my guard down completely knowing that I'm not in danger and that I'm with someone well-intending who, at worst, doesn't wish me harm and, at best, actively cares about my well-being. In other words, a relationship like any other. I very much want and like the idea of giving myself body and soul to a woman who has consideration for me, for whom I have value and who is in charge of the relationship (FLR). As I said, I want to put myself in a situation of total vulnerability in a controlled and safe environment with a person I can trust and who means well. I want to put myself below them in every situation and always put them before myself unconditionally. I want to live under domestic servitude, as well as having a romantic, ordinary, monogamous relationship like any other. If there's no love, there's no point. I can't explain exactly what I feel, but I see this dynamic as the most honest way I can express love to my owner, mistress and friend. This is the rawest and most sincere manifestation of my personality. And please don't get me wrong: I'm not here trying to "cure" myself through BDSM or draw attention to myself by talking about my problems that nobody cares about. I'm just putting all this into context and explaining objective reality as it is, that's all.
I have no idea how I'm going to fulfill this dream and where I'm going to find this woman. I see a lot of profiles here of dommes who are only in it for fetishistic reasons and to make money and that makes me a little sad. But I understand, since a relationship can end up being a very big responsibility and many women don't want this kind of burden in their lives. Not to mention that the temptation of financial gain must be too great for them not to take advantage of. And in an economy like this, I think it will be considerably difficult to find a woman who will want to keep someone at home without generating income just taking care of the household chores. The odds don't seem to be in my favor and the entire setting seems less than ideal.
I feel disgusted by and abhor any fetish scenario that involves the element of being a housewife, maid and the like, especially if it includes elements of humiliation for carrying out such activity. I understand that for some it can be pleasurable, but for me it's despicable. I can't associate being a housewife with something humiliating and if that's your intention with me, don't get in touch. As for sexual activity in general in a relationship, I don't have much to say. Hormone replacement therapy completely obliterated my libido and I see no purpose in any activity that promotes my sexual pleasure. To all intents and purposes, I've become somewhat asexual. I'd accept being penetrated by my domme if she wanted to, since I'd put her wishes before my own, but I feel it's hardly something I'd ask for. I'm much more interested in the emotional side of the relationship than the sexual.
Still on the subject of sexuality, I feel that the word "virgin" isn't accurate enough to describe myself. This word is used to refer to people who have never had sex, which is my case, but I've also never had any other intimate experience with a woman. It's not that I've never had sex, I've never even hugged a woman in bed. I've barely experienced any degree of intimacy with a woman before. I suppose this complete lack of sexual experience will be viewed in a very bad light by the women I seek, but I don't think there's much I can do about it. I have no interest in having these first experiences with, for example, a prostitute because I'm looking for a real emotional connection in a legitimate relationship. I'm a romantic and I have no choice but to wait.
I can't imagine a life in which I allow this dream not to come true. It can't not happen. If it doesn't, I'll have an extremely bitter deathbed full of regrets.
When it comes to the woman I'm looking for, I only have three demands: don't be a drug user (cigarretes included), be a gentle domme and unconditionally monogamous.
My gratitude for you will be eternal and my debt to you unpayable.
I hope the woman I'm looking for is out there waiting to be found.
kool4kats hi, what ya think?

Burgundy Steak, inspired by Dracula: She’s gotta look like a stylish badass with a vampire aesthetic, someone who Coco would be friends with. Some of my ideas come from Allucard from Hellsing and Code from B:TBV
Linen Dune, inspired by the Mummy: I know I need bandages and some pharaoh-related stuff, I’m still working on this one
Uranium Bolt, inspired by Frankenstein’s monster: I’m thinking about giving him a navy green trench coat, plus I’m making him a cyborg, so we need to show some mechanical parts, (I’m looking at Ironwood), and his clothes need stitches
Denarius Silverbane, inspired by the werewolf: Of course I’m making him a wolf faunus inspirations include Wolverine, Kraven the Hunter, and Lycan from the “Linen” trailer
Some of these might not be extremely clear, but I wanna hear suggestions for characters who fit with their respective monster’s aesthetics or characters who might have traits in their designs that might fit my descriptions

We've been together for over a year and a half. My last partner died in my early 20s and I took a couple of years away from dating before he and I met. This is relevant because I moved into a home in a very rural and forested area and rode out my grief there. Long walks and sitting outside staring into the trees. I felt safe and comforted, and I really fell in love with nature.
About halfway into our relationship my bf asked me what color reminded me of him, and I said green. I went on with a bunch of personal things and told him "You're my spring after a hard winter." I pointed out a particular shade on my favorite tree.
He just said "Ugh, I hate green." (He had NEVER mentioned this before) and went on about how it was the popular boy color when he was a kid but he never liked it. I said "Uh, sorry I guess?" at the end and we stopped talking about it. He had previously had weird reactions to similar questions, but this was the one that hurt the most because he didn't even listen to my reason and just got annoyed.
Recently he's been sending me tiktoks that are in the vein of that question or "choose which is your partner" and I'm usually just asking what he thinks he is or putting a react on them without responding. I think he is confused by this, but I feel like bringing up an old conversation he probably doesn't even remember is not going to be helpful. At the same time, I'm not interested in giving him my opinion if there's a wrong answer. Is there a good way for me to approach this?
tl;dr told my bf he reminded me of a color I love for a lot of sappy reasons and he just said "Ugh, (rant about how he hates it)" Now I don't want to answer questions like this and I'm not sure how to tell him

Hi all,
I recently fell in love with 23.5 the series and want to deep dive into the world of Thai GL novels. I know that Meb and Lunarwrite are places to read these novels in English. I noticed they are pretty expensive (about the price of buying a physical book at the bookstore), so I wanted to know if you preferred one or the other for reading your Thai GL novels. Which app has better translations and pricing? If I'm going to spend that much money, I want to make sure I'm buying a good translation and optimal reading experience. Are there certain novels that are best on one app over another? Thanks for your help!!!!!

A man came in looking for a room and I quoted him the price and mentioned the security deposit which has to be on a credit card or major bank debit card.

Him- I don't have card, I have cash.
Bran- Oh, I'm sorry. You do have to have a card to check in here.
Him- I have cash.
Bran- I understand, you do have to have a card to check in here.
Him- I have cash.
Bran- Again, we need a card for the deposit.
Him- I only have cash.
Bran- I apologize, unfortunately you won't be able to check in then.
Him- What if I go to bank? Will they give me card?
Bran- It's 7pm so I don't think a bank will be open but [other economy hotel] doesn't require a card. You could try there.
Him- Is this Shmarriot?
Bran- No?
Him- Exactly! This is Sunrise Inn! Every Sunrise Inn takes cash deposits.
Bran- We do not take cash deposits here. It's a franchise, and those sorts of policies are-
Him- Why no cash?

I contemplated properly explaining, but opted not to because I was pretty sure he didn't care and just wanted to keep arguing at this point.

Bran- The owner doesn't want to.

At this point a couple dudes in construction blaze yellow came in behind him and he seemed to give up. He turned to talk to them. Fortunately his level of Spanish is on par with mine so I knew he was bitching to them about the card requirement. They seemed confused and didn't really engage with him. He watched them come up to the desk and one of them held up their phone with google translate, saying that they were picking up keys their boss had left for them. I gave them the keys and the other guy mumbled and stormed off.
I do not understand the impulse to keep arguing when you've been told you won't be able to check in.

I had a lot of bad things happen in a short (relatively) time span, my boyfriend passed away, and I didn't go to college because my Mom was having legal trouble involving an abusive ex step father.
I worked in veterinary medicine as a vet receptionist for a long time (5+ years) my Dad is a vet, but I've always felt like I was unsure of going into that much debt, and it's a very thankless profession. I left when a vet my Mom managed, who we both knew, killed himself in the practice and took his dog with him.
I did temp jobs for a while and got a job out of vet med as a sales operations executive for a wine company in London. I was good at it. I stuck with it for a while. It was basically managing the accounts while the account managers were out selling- and they were always out selling. Lots of logistical solutions, KPI's, documents, system updating ECT.
The company went belly up.
I left and we moved back to the US, from there I started having panic attacks, I was live in caring for a relative who was dying and my life went down hill.
I eventually found a job, but I don't love it and I am embarrassed to talk about it (it's nothing explicit). I earn okay ($24-25 an hour usually) if I did this for a while I could save some money. I cringe when people ask me what I do though, the worst thing is I'm good at it.
I don't know if going back to school is right for me. I wasn't a bad student, but I had bad experiences I got bullied by a teacher and left in a-levels.
I have a lot of interests but I don't know which ones are useful and which ones aren't.
I have been in therapy but all we do is talk about trauma, and I really want to solve this issue. I feel like a failure. I am 27, live at home, no education, no relationship, nothing of note...
I see people my age and younger with all these glittering careers and money and it's like I've only even known struggle and people taking advantage.

Does anyone know of any good (preferably long) fanfics where it starts off with the canon script of the show but then an identity reveal happens and it turns into a fanfic?
A specific episode i keep thinking about is transmission and the “I don’t care Marinette I love you just the way you are scene”, I keep thinking it would be such a cute episode to rewrite as a reveal to Adrien that she is ladybug
I love the idea of keeping the plot similar to what happens in the show consistent with fanfics but changing important things like identity reveals and what not. I don’t know if these exist or if it’s something I need to start writing myself
I’m not super fussy with fanfics but if you have any ones that you recommend (similar to what I described or not) I would love to read them

Hello, I am open to cisgender and/or transgender females in order to have a lifelong relationship together. I am not sure about wanting to stay in my country, so eventually relocating is something I'd be willing to do if you think it's realistic and that could work for us (so it's probably better if you're from the USA, or my country).
If you care about this, I don't really mind where you stand on the MBTI, I myself have scored as an INTP, INTJ and ISTJ, so if you are an introvert as well, that could be great. Need to add that I currently do not have a job, however I am trying my best in order to do things/courses and furthering my education/résumé.
What I'm searching in someone is:

• Ideally vegan, plant-based, or in a serious path to become one (if you absolutely think that you cannot become one after having tried, for health/equally important reasons, I'll understand).
• Drug/smoking/drinking/disease free (as I am) and keeps a reasonably healthy lifestyle at the very least.
• Monogamous and loyal, who wants a lifelong relationship, and believes that is feasible for us to finally be together at some point.
• Relatively close to my age (it's flexible, but +/- 4 years from my own seems reasonable).
• Childfree (doesn't have nor want kids).
• Not a ghoster.

Now these are the things that would describe me: I am very shy and introverted, and have never had a romantic relationship; I greatly value loyalty, love and understanding in someone, so if you give me that, you'll also receive it.
I'm generally very reluctant to take and post images of me publicly, but here I can describe a couple of physical traits, because I know it can be a deal breaker to some: I'm not very attractive, mostly because of my hairline and the fact that I wear glasses (I think I'm slightly better looking without them, but I'd rather not wear contact lenses for now), and I'm around 5'3''. That's the main thing, other than that I look average, but if I shave, I kind of look a bit stereotypically "nerdy".
As you've guessed by now, I'm plant-based, so essentially I follow a vegan diet and do not intend to change that. I am slightly left-leaning and don't tend to like extremes when it comes to politics; I am atheist/agnostic.
My hobbies are typically indoor, which includes things like: relaxing with music, doing digital art (sometimes), watching movies/shows/anime, browsing stuff on the Internet, and lately, reading some stuff. I am not much of a gamer, I don't even have a console anymore, but if that's your thing, when we meet and if you'd like, I'd definitely be willing to play with you in case that's one of your hobbies. I'll also be happy to join you in doing casual exercise if you like doing that, but I am by no means a hardcore gym-enthusiast.
My intention is to have, firstly, a LDR in order for us to get to know each other better and see if we're compatible, and if so, then it would hopefully develop into a healthy, loyal, and honest relationship. Not only that, but I'll also want to be your best friend, which means that I'll want to do all kinds of things together, from day to day stuff, to sharing hobbies, etc.
If you think this could actually work, feel free to send me a PM and tell me a bit about you! Have a nice day!

Hey baristas, a customer came from another store wanting a refund…
He is a regular here and the manager loves him and his wife. He is picky and usually has an issue with drinks every once in awhile but my manager babies most customers and gets them whatever they want.
I was confused why he didn’t go to that store and I said no to a refund because he didn’t purchase it here but I offered to remake the two drinks. One was basically empty and the other one he said he asked oatmilk. I made the oatmilk one and then for the other one he asked for a cookie instead? I said no because he didn’t order food but again offered to remake the already almost empty drink.
He said no problem and that he will come talk to the manager tomorrow.
I wasn’t mean but it has been a long and draining shift as we are only 2 partners from 3-9:30. I don’t think he got too upset but I definitely didn’t give him what he wanted.
Was I wrong in handling the situation? Is there any information about this in any handbook?

Imma sound like such a 🤓 saying this but I legit had chills reading the second MCQ about linguistics because I absolutely love linguistics and I got inspired to write a reeearch paper on this topic. Also had hella fun writing the essays especially the girls who code founder rhetorical analysis one.

hey, ive never posted on here before, i made a reddit account just to get some advice for my situation. I 18F just found out that my stepmom is pregnant. i really love my stepmom and my father but i really dont know how to go about this situation. i have an older brother 22M and he seems so unaffected by this but i just dont know how to feel. im obviously very happy for them and excited to meet my new sibling. i guess im asking for advice about being an older sibling, especially one with an 18 year age gap. if anyone has any advice i would greatly appreciate it.

I wanted to make this post not only for myself but also as a bit of encouragement to those in their early days of this process.
For a bit of background, Im 18 and was consuming about 3 energy drinks a day for around 2-3 years. It all started when I began having late nights due to schoolwork, and it just kept getting worse and worse. 3 Years of terrible sleep and drinking anywhere from 400-800mg of caffeine every single day.
I was forced to quit cold turkey after I had a really scary panic attack one night for no reason. I'm a totally healthy kid, both physically and mentally, and had never experienced anything like it before. I had panic attacks for about a week straight every single night, and even went to the er because I thought there was something terribly wrong with me.
As of now, 2 months later, I feel much better than I did in that first week. I don't feel great or like myself at all, but it has gotten better.
Here's a little timeline of what I've experienced:
Weeks 1-2:

• Terrible anxiety that lasted all day long. I would wake up with it and it would never go away
  
• Insomnia. Really difficult to fall asleep and when I did fall asleep I would wake up at 1am and couldn't go back to sleep
  
• Heavy depersonalization. Nothing around me felt real, and i felt like an alien.
  
• Depression/Anhedonia. I got enjoyment out of nothing and life felt pointless. Even had some suicidal thoughts at points because I thought I would never feel normal again.
  
• Panic Attacks every night
  
• Heart Palpitations. All day long.
  

Weeks 2-4:

• I stopped having panic attacks, but all the other symptoms were still there. They got a little bit better, but I was still suffering.

Month 2:

• All of these symptoms continued to improve. I started having panic attacks & insomnia again during week 6, went away in another week or so.

As of right now I'd say I feel on the lower end of okay. I don't feel very much joy, still having less enjoyment in activites I normally love, just feel blah. I do have moments of joy and hope throughout the day though. It is hard to describe but it feels like a short wave of happiness and joy just comes over me for a minute and then leaves again. Overall, im just missing the joy and contentment that I used to have.
This has been really hard. It does get better, and I have started to feel like myself again, but it just takes time. DO NOT LET PEOPLE TELL YOU THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU. It pisses me off that there are people on here telling others that the caffeine was "Masking a depression or anxiety" and just know that these people are idiots. If that was true, then explain how i've started to feel better on my own with no medication. If you were happy and joyful before you quit caffeine, you will go back to feeling that way, and if not, youll feel even better than that! These people do not understand and trust me when I tell you it gets better. Own your experience and know that some people feel better in a few weeks, some people take months, others take a year or more. Don't look at this story and then expect to feel better in two months like I did. It is totally normal to take much much longer to get there.

Lately, many guys have been asking about matchmakers, so I am going to write a series of articles focusing on matchmakers - what they do and what to look for.
A Personal Process
The matchmaking process is an incredibly personal. A person who knows you introduces you to another person they know.
That part of it is simple and easy to understand. It was one of the primary ways people met. Often the matchmaker was an aunt or the wife of a minister or rabbi or maybe the school marm or post mistress in the American West. Usually, it was a woman who knew a lot of people in the community.
Of course, matchmakers still play an important role in most of the world, although it is not nearly as common in the US or Europe as it was even fifty years ago. This largely is a result of a general rise in the age of marriage and an explosion in the movement of people, because you need to really know two people before you match them. Sadly, today in the West nobody knows anyone, so matchmaking is not as common.
Professional Matchmakers
In fact, professional matchmakers were largely restricted to immigrant communities until about twenty years ago. In big American cities there were still a few women making a living as Italian, Greek, Japanese, Chinese, Polish, or Jewish matchmakers, but often these were very small businesses.
Something changed and I don't really know what but the industry grew out of those issues. It seems to have revived first in New York City with millionaire matchmakers charging exorbitant rates to match very wealthy men with beautiful younger women.
The problem was that these matchmakers usually did not know the men or the women, so they created a process based on traditional methods mixed with modern social science research. The process its self is important.
The Process
The matchmaking process is still very personal, but often feels more like a job interview. You work directly with a matchmaker for weeks. They ask an array of very personal questions in an attempt to determine exactly what they right type of woman for you is.
It is very detailed. Here is the form that AFA requires its matchmaking clients to fill out. Other services go into even more detail and some require sessions with a psychologist. For a lot of guys this is a turn-off because it feels too invasive.
Then the matchmaker selects the women for you to meet based on this research. Some of the matchmakers will not even tell you anything about the woman you are paying hundreds and possibly thousands of dollars to meet. Others allow a lot more input including looking at photos.
I understand the concerns about photos. Men are incredibly visual. They often look at a photo and "Fall in Love!" This gums up the meeting process, but if you get a guy in front of a woman - maybe a woman who is not his idea of drop dead gorgeous there might be enough real chemistry to spark a relationship.
Next the matchmaker selects the first date. Usually, the international matchmakers provide the drive, translator, and have already chosen the restaurant. They try very hard to make these first dates perfect.
Then the next day the client is de-briefed by the matchmaker. What happens next depends on this debriefing. Sometimes there is a second date with the woman and other times moving on to a different woman. Sometimes they have the unpleasant task of telling the man - who is the paying customer - that the woman is not interested in him. Then they will discuss what the man can do to improve his form and begin looking for the next match.
This process might continue for a set number of dates or time. It all depends. Generally, matchmakers have a pretty high success rate, especially for financially successful men with a really poor dating track record.
And one of the best thing about all matchmakers is that they are really trying very, very hard. They want to see you succeed. Even the worst want you to succeed as another notch on their broom, but the best will coach you, encourage you, educate with you, cry with you, and celebrate with you.
Factors To Consider When Selecting a Matchmaker

1. General Personality: You are going to spend a ton of time with the matchmaker and their staff. Do you like how they carry themselves and what you can tell of their ethics? What is their background and education? If you do not match well with them the process will be difficult.
2. Aggressiveness: Some matchmakers are VERY pushy. That is a regular issue for men. Be sure you like and respect your matchmaker before you spend any money, and that you are willing to listen to their advice. Otherwise you are simply wasting your time and money.
3. Transparency: How much do they charge and when do they tell you the price? Some matchmakers are notorious for not telling men their price until they know a ton about them and can therefore squeeze them for the maximum amount. This is one of the worse industry practices.
4. Price: The price of high end matchmaking can be more than $500k. That is at the very top of the US and European market. In international matchmaking there is at least one company that advertises a $100k package, although I bet they rarely sell them. In international matchmaking I would say the price usually runs from $5k for a simple package of a few dates in one city to about $20k for scores of dates in a variety of countries over a period of months. SHOP AROUND! Compare price and services.
5. Size Database: How many women do they actually have in their database? This is another issue full of lack of transparency. Often these agencies have very limited catalogs but can reach out to other matchmakers for a trade. This creates a slow complicated process. The more women they have in their database the simpler the process is and the higher chance of success.
6. Location: Where are the women located? This is usually self-evident but since the war in Ukraine it is more important than ever.
7. The Matchmaking Process: Ask them to explain EXACTLY what their process is? Who is involved and how are the women vetted? Ask if you will get to see the women's profiles and photos. I would be careful about ruling out a well regarded service over this issue, but you should know before you start.
8. Reviews: Read the reviews and try to talk to people who actually used them.
9. Beauty: No, not the matchmakers beauty - your potential matches beauty. If you are at least partially driven by beauty mention it and listen to the reaction. Every matchmaker wishes men were not so visual, but you can judge a lot by what they say about this question both good and bad.
10. Settling: A matchmaker should not start out expecting you to settle. You might need to work on yourself and maybe be more open to possibilities, but not to settling. You want a matchmaker who is as devoted to finding you the perfect match as your mom.

Reader Feedback
Have you used a matchmaker. If so, please, please write the name of the company. I have some questions I will DM you for use in future reviews.
Best Wishes!
​

I have a girlfriend, though i do not know her in person, and we've dating on and off for abouta year now, we've distanced ourselves about two or three times now, but end up coming back. We both live in Brazil, but in two different ( even if close ) and due to that and other factors we've grown up in very different ambients, which led to she being alot of "experienced" than me, having lost her virginity at a very young age and having multiple relationships. In the other hand i've one had two "relationships" which lasted very little The problem comes due to my difficulty in trusting people. I've seen messages of her complimenting the appearence of an alleged friend of hers, and even if she says to me and to my friends to love me, she acts weird sometimes. Most recently i've noticed she was playing NSFW games on steam, and even if i can understand, i can't help but feel unconfortable and skeptic. I truly feel something for her but it causes me much harm and anxiety to be constantly worried.

My friends have been really supportive and im grateful for that but one friend is having mental health issues and is looking for support. I was usually the one who is leaned on before my moms diagnosis and I am not saying mental health is not important - it is definitely but is it selfish to be angry because their mental health doesn’t have anything to do with cancer. I hate comparing struggles but being a caregiver, I have trauma from seeing my mom devolve into a person she once was. And this is only after surgery. With a cancer that has only around 11% 5-year survival rate (and I hate using stats), I don’t go a day without wondering if she’ll be here in the future. I’m already putting so much mental energy into taking care of her, driving to all the appts, cooking, managing her care, etc - I truly don’t have energy to be a therapist for my friend.
Is that selfish to say? I just feel we as caregivers dont owe our time or energy to anything else, we really only have time to focus on caring for our loved ones. I feel like they just need to focus on therapy. And I know as a friend I should be there and I am but I can’t do more than that at this moment.
I act as if I’m good on the outside but in reality im just happy to live with my family another day. I really don’t have the energy to tell my whole story (they know about it) so I just find it so infuriating even though I KNOW MENTAL HEALTH ISNT CONTROLLABLE but I just keep finding it unfair as no one in their immediately family has cancer. Is it wrong to feel this way, someone please let me know I truly don’t know at this point. I honestly don’t care if im a selfish bitch at this point.

As a maintenance man, I’ve definitely seen my fair share of oddities in peoples homes. However, the story I’m about to tell you is definitely one that is new to me.
So as I stated before I work in maintenance. Commercial and residential. Been doing it almost 10 years now. Everyday is something new and that’s why I love this job. Helping people. Seeing their smiles whenever something that was broke is fixed and they are able to go about life normally again. It really makes my heart swell.
The incident in question happened on a day that started out like any other day. I got to work, went into my office, started some coffee and began checking over my workload for the day.
My first work order for the day was in a unit that had a new resident in it. I have yet to meet the young lady in question so as procedure states I gave her a call to let her know I would be stopping by today to take care of the issue she submitted. She had a clogged sink, which, in the years of doing this I know isn’t going to be a long job so best to knock it out early.
When she answered her phone she sounded out of breath. “Hello?” “Good morning Ms. [redacted]. My name is Jimmy the maintenance tech here at [redacted] I was wondering if I could come by and take a look at your sink for you this morning?” There was a long pause. So long I had to see if she was still there.
“Ms. [redacted]?” “Yes! ….I mean yes. You can come by this morning. Umm… yes. That’s fine.” “GREAT!” I respond. “I will be up in about 30 minutes. See you soon!”
I hung up and finished the coffee I had poured while on the phone with her and began gathering any tools I may need for the job.
About 40 minutes later I was standing on her porch and knocking on her door. “Ms.[redacted]? It’s Jimmy with maintenance.” A loud clatter could be heard from the other side of the door before a petite young lady snatched the door open looking very distraught.
“Is everything ok? I can come back later if you..” “No no. You can come in now” she cut me off. “It’s the kitchen sink, right here.” Pointing just passed the threshold into the kitchen. I nod and make my way in closing the door behind me.
I’ll save you the boredom of the explanation of how I fixed the leak but regardless, it was fixed. The odd thing was that she stood there in the doorway to the kitchen the entire time. Not necessarily watching me but seemingly blocking me from the rest of the house.
Although I thought she was acting odd it is not in my job description to be a psychiatrist to people. I fix their sinks, not their heads. I gave her a clean bill of health for her sink and said my goodbyes.
Two days later I get another service request from the same unit. If there is anyone out there familiar with RealPage you know that there is the section that the resident can fill in what the issue is. This one simply said “Other- see comments.” Under the comments says “Please help.”
I make my way back up to her unit to investigate the problem. I was not ready for what was waiting on me on the other side of the door.
A rush to the door and a breathless, petite woman stands in front of me.
Good morning Ms. [redacted]. What seems to be the issue. She takes a deep breath, “I have another clog.” “Oh no. Where is it? Let me take a look so I can go grab my…” Before I knew it she had snatched me inside by my shirt and slammed the door behind us. “You have been extremely nice and so willing to help since I’ve been here.” Even though I had only been here once. “You seem like a really great and trustworthy guy.” “Thank you.” I say trying to hide the shock and uneasy feeling I felt creeping up my gut.
“I have something very important I need your help with. Follow me.” With that she started back towards the steps and beckoned me to follow her. Once at the top of the steps I could see into the bathroom and could see this was going to be much bigger than even I was ready for.

He have hade a cat since she was a kitten. She is now 3 years old. For most of her life she has behaved well other than typical cat mischievousness. For the past year now she has been throwing up her food very frequently and I think it might be a behavioural problem. We have taken her to the vet and she has a slight heart murmur that the vet is not too concerned about, but otherwise she is healthy. When my cat eats, she often eats very fast and we have to sow her down while she is eating. We also use a slow feed bowl. When she throws up, there are whole kibble pieces, so I think the main problem is that she is eating too fast, but manually slowing her down and using the slow feeder have not been helping. With the slow feeder, now the cat will eat a handful of kibble then go throw it up, so it has helped that the volume of food that the cat vomits is less, but the problem is still there. We have tried multiple foods, but no different results. I wonder if this is a behavioural issue, it seems like she throws her food up more frequently when she gets in trouble (e.g., we yell at her for knocking things down, or we do no allow her to lay with us when putting our children down for nap etc.). For more context, we have two cats, this one is the dominant one and the cats do not share bowls for feeding, so I don't think she is eating fast because she is scared the other cat will eat her food. We were previously allowing the cats to do graze feeding, leaving their bowls filled during the day and they would eat at their leisure. Since the vomiting, we use slow feeders and only provide enough food in the bowl for them to have a meal. We have had two children since we have had this cat, maybe she gets jealous since we need to spend more time with the kids rather than her?
Anyways, would love to hear some strategies.
Summary: - Cat vomiting often after feeding - Cat mostly healthy and has seen a vet - Cat eats fast. We use slow feeder bowls and intervene if the we notice she is feeding too fast - two small kids, two cats, problematic cat is the dominant cat - tried different food

My wife of 12 years, together for 15 years, just decided one day she was gonna move out. We have 3 kids together and she wants to split custody. Apparently been unhappy for awhile. Because I haven't been able to pay as much as I used to on bills and stuff. And other things she said I never listened to or changed. But I fixed things she had problems with. It just wasn't 100% her way all the time...
Such a shock. For two months I've been trying to hard to make her see differently. She said counseling maybe but I go to set that up and she starts being negative about that.
IDK what to do. I can't do it myself but I really just wanna stop living. People keep telling me to live for my kids but it's not making me feel any different.
I put my whole self into our marriage and family and she is just able to walk away like 15 years didn't happen.
I'm hurting so bad and it's not going away. I don't wanna be alive. I know this sounds dramatic but I really don't. I want my life to be over. It's not fair and it's not right. All I did was love her and be faithful and present and attentive. To our kids as well.

Just wanted to point out to all of you out there that are suffering from anxiety, or any other kind of mental health condition, that you are a bunch of badasses.
Seriously though. You're all real life modern warriors. You create fortresses in your heads, with knights and tall walls, forever holding off the darkness. Like a beacon of light in neverending darkness. Perhaps it's a battle that will go on for the rest of your life, but that just makes you even more badass. You're not like everyone else, you're unique, you've got the battle scars to prove it. You've seen and been through things that few others have, or even could.
Here's the thing though. People that have struggled less with their mental health will never be able to understand or empathise. Don't let them fool you into thinking you're weak. You're the exact opposite of weak, you're an absolute badass. Imagine if they were put in your position, they would spiral and crash, and YOU are keeping it together, surviving. War is tiring, don't blame yourself if you don't have the energy to do what you want to do.
Even if there's nobody else in the world looking up to you, think of me, you have my respect, big time. You're my inspiration. And if there's me, there are definitely others out there that think the same.
So, keep fighting and holding off the darkness. Life is about the stories we tell, and yours is one of strength and courage.

Hi, thanks for reading. Before I start, I’d really appreciate some understanding and as little judgment as possible, if that’s possible.
Here are the facts of my life:
I got married and bought a house all within less than a month of each other. Moved in with my fiancé for the first time, then got married in the same month. He’s great, but I got very little help with wedding planning and house hunting. I took on a LOT over the best couple years.
Fast forward to after the wedding we are having to get used to living together. My mental health isn’t great. I have bad anxiety (still do). Things got better and we both wanted cats. Got two kittens a few months after.
Kittens were not what I wanted but they were cute and I love cats. They ended up sick and had fleas- shelter didn’t tell us. They were sick for weeks and we spent like $1200 within a week. I had to miss work and was struggling mentally. My husband just got a job and couldn’t stay home to help.
Ultimately we decided the best option would be to bring them back to the shelter. They stayed in the infirmary there for a bit and then they both got adopted.
My mental health got a bit better and this January I thought things were great. We both wanted a cat but it was my idea to go to the shelter (same one as the kittens). We adopted a 4 year old cat. They said she was very friendly and chill. That’s what I wanted for our lifestyle.
She IS very sweet, but has some behavior things that the shelter didn’t tell us. She swats without warning and yesterday she scratched my ankle and made it bleed. This behavior seems to be getting worse.
The thing is, I seem to be her person. She likes being around me. She is really sweet. But the past 4.5 months have been horrible for my mental health. I have to take care of her the most since I work from home more.
She has everything should could want, and I’ve tried all sorts of things to help her settle. Her behavior just makes no sense. I know it takes time for cats to settle, but she seems happy but then sort of attacked me yesterday.
I don’t know if I can take the mental toll of this all. It’s not her fault AT ALL. I just don’t think I am cut out for this right now. I’ve been so stressed for the better part of two years. I think this was a bad time to adopt again.
I just think I’m horrible. How can I rehome another cat? One who isn’t even bad? My mental health is just suffering and I don’t think I can manage this all. There’s more I didn’t get into about my life that feeds the negativity, but I don’t know if I can give her what she needs.
I would really appreciate some advice, maybe from people who have rehomed before. Please try to be as non judgmental as possible. I never thought I’d be this person. Thank you.

First of all yes i know that we have an age gap that most people are alarmed by. We met when i was 18 and he was 26 on discord, i had met his friend on a public server, then i got invited to a private server where i met my boyfriend.
I wont lie i immediately started flirting with him a week or two in. Because i just thought he was funny and i didnt really take the flirting seriously. I asked him for his snap which he avoided giving me, a few days went by and i asked him about it, he said that he didnt really want things to get weird since im younger.
Then we kept talking for about 2 months, we moved to snap and were talking 24/7. He said that he didn’t just wanna flirt with me, that he wanted to develop a better friendship before that.
So fast forward to a year and a half, where we first met, we spent two weeks together and honestly it was the best time of my life, we had the best chemistry, he makes me laugh and feel comfortable and i just felt so connected to him. Then three months later we saw each other again then 6 months later we saw each other for the 3rd time.
So thats the main layout of our relationship, he really is a great guy, he doesn’t make me feel bad for my emotions like many people in my life do, he makes me feel appreciated, and when we are together he couldn’t be better in any way, he cleans up the rooms we stay at, he always makes sure i eat and buy whatever i like and makes me feel great about my body and self esteem. He is affectionate, he cares. He truly cares.
But then…. When its back online and aren’t together anymore shit just gets so rocky for me. I start to notice everything that i dont like or appreciate about him. Like the fact that his only interest is just gaming. Thats just his main/ only hobby. And i wish it was gaming in general because i like certain types of games, no. Its just apex legends and before you ask no i cant play with him because my laptop wont run it.
Anyway the reason i bring that up is because he doesnt show interest or any kind of curiosity to anything i like. Or he doesnt put in effort for us to do activities online (or real life) together. For instance if i wanna watch a movie together he would go on about how he doesnt wanna sit on his computer for 2 hours watching a movie, and make a whole fuss. Then he would put on the movie while sulking just to be like “i actually liked it yea” he has NEVER once (in our two year relationship) brought up a movie recommendation on his own. He has NEVER brought up a game recommendation on his own for us to do, i suggested it takes two, stardew valley, portal 2, rocket league… etc. BUT WHY CANT HE BE THE ONE TO DO IT. I DONT EVEN PLAY GAMES.
Anytime i try to show him a song or any kind of video he makes it HELL for me. He just starts ranting about how i consume shitty content or how the songs i like don’t interest him and he sighs and sulks throughout the whole thing meanwhile i would sit and listen to entire albums IF HE WERE TO SHOW ME WHICH HE NEVER DOES.
Sigh. I just…. Find him.. unintresting because he acts so uninterested. I just feel like i would like to spend time with someone where the fun isn’t reliant on me. And even if it is, i want someone to be able to watch movies and show with and dissect characters and talk about. That has never happened with him. He isn’t the type of person to look deep into things just for fun.
We have talked and argued about these things way too many times. Obviously nothing has changed or will change. But I obviously still love him so much. And i KNOW that he loves me just as much. He has been there for me like no one in my life ever has, and he never held it against me. All the times i treated him badly. We stuck together, and we have so many amazing memories. But i still have doubts. He is my first boyfriend and i am his first girlfriend after 8 years of being single.
We align in so many ways, our values and goals in our lives. I think about being married to him but i also think about these things that i dislike about him coming to the forefront once we live together. Maybe i will just find my life boring with him and his lack of effort/ thoughtfulness exhausting.
Please help.