be me; ex LizarDM
be also me; Adonis Valintellis (Tiefling Paladin), Thalia Milakos (Human Ranger) and Zaahir Kehmet (Earth Genasi Wizard)
the soldier stifled a yawn as he patrolled the sandy beaches of Kalikos
clouds hid the island from the moon’s spectral glow, casting the land into darkness and turning the often silver seas black as coal
his shift had been a long one and just as boring as expected
where once his mind had been sharp and alert, it now lingered on thoughts of a cold drink and a warm bed
his eyes scanned the shore superficially, passing over the same stones and grassy knolls he’d seen a hundred times before
on any other night, he may have noticed the discrepancies in the shoreline
the new rock that appeared almost boat-like on second glance
but alas, his mind was a thousand miles away, and the javelin hit him without warning
the soldier collapsed to his knees, gasping for air like a fish on land
his armour had spared him from the worst of the damage, but the javelin had done its job
stunned and winded, he was rendered defenceless against the four figures that emerged from the darkness
a thought crossed his mind to sound the alarm; but his limbs refused to move and his lungs pleaded for breath
one member of the pack split from the rest. A stout dwarf with a full beard and a grim expression
they approached the helpless man, drawing a sharply curved short sword from their belt
the soldier tried to move
tried to yell
but the dwarf closed the distance between them and cut his throat, putting a violent end to his struggles
wiping the blood clean from his weapon, Oryk hauled the body behind cover before jogging to catch up with his companions
the Order of the Twins moved like shadows in the night. Their passage muffled by the spells woven about their feet
that said, their infiltration still proved easier than expected
skirting the edges of the island, the party avoided common paths and watchful eyes; slipping between gaps in the meagre defences they encountered
their route took them just below the peak of the island; where a lavish home stared out across the ocean
in the distance, tiny twinkling lights just barely outlined the Athosi mainland
the house itself was lit up like a beacon in the night, and roaming globules of fire identified the few guards on rotation. Six or seven at most
less than a third of what they had anticipated
counting their blessings, the small band of adventurers navigated the narrow pathways around the house and approached the island’s southern side, where a lonely dirt road wound its way towards a grove of trees
they moved swiftly and silently through the long grass that grew on either side, but they needn’t have bothered
the road was unguarded, and the entrance to the grove lay bare
“this is too easy,” Cyrene whispered; fidgeting nervously with an iron band around her wrist. “Where are the rest of the guards?”
she, like the rest of her companions, had a dishevelled look to her appearance
a thinness to her features that implied more than a couple missed meals
Oryk shot her a stern look, and the half orc immediately shut her mouth
turning his gaze to the two half elves to his rear, he was answered with obedient silence
Maia had always been thin, but now she was practically gaunt
her eyes carried a weight, and an ugly scar split her lip on the left side
Iris, her sister, had once identified herself with long curly hair
now, it was cut short, and crudely so. As if done with an altogether uncaring hand
both twins wore the same iron band as Cyrene around their left wrist
a thin piece of metal that coiled around their limb like a snake
with a commanding wave of his hand, Oryk led the party through the grove’s northern entrance and into the trees beyond
moving like ghosts between the thin trunks and shallow underbrush, the group made good progress before they heard the sudden snap of a twig in the darkness
Oryk raised a fist and the advance came to an abrupt stop, scanning their surroundings with tense expressions
a series of soft whispers drifted between the trees, accompanied by the rustling of leaves and groaning of branches
the dwarven fighter drew his sica and his companions complied, unsheathing their weapons in response
they began to spot lithe, feminine figures peering out at them from behind the trees. Staring at the strangers with bright, emerald eyes
the women had skin like mottled bark, and hair that plumed about them like foliage
“dryads,” Cyrene declared, lowering her rhomphaia with the faintest hint of relief
Iris and Maia exchanged a look before lowering their own weapons, albeit keeping them close at hand
Oryk, however, raised his short sword threateningly, and pointed it at the nearest nature spirit
“get back in your trees and stay there. Interfere, and we will not hesitate to kill you”
the dryad in question retreated, but the others stood their ground as a frantic whispering filled the trees around them
something dangerous glimmered in Oryk’s eyes, and his fingers tightened around the hilt of his sica
“NOW!” he suddenly bellowed, his voice deep and commanding
the drayds scattered into the trees, leaving a myriad of foul curses and even fouler odours in their wake
Oryk gave a satisfied grunt and turned to leave, only to nearly walk into the dryad that now stood in his way
a spirit with speckled, ashy skin and a stern, stubborn expression
Oryk approached them with his weapon raised
“get out of my way,” he growled. “I won’t ask a third time”
the dryad stared down at him like a disapproving adult would a petulant child, and when it spoke, it did so with a voice like wind through a canopy
“if you were wise, you would return to your masters. You will not find what you seek here”
its eyes lifted to the party, as if directing its words to them
with a snarl, Oryk swiped at the dryad, only to be met by a cloud of pollen and stinging nettles
cursing aloud between bouts of frantic coughing, the dwarf fled the swarm and started rubbing his eyes, which had already begun streaming with tears
muttering under her breath, Cyrene approached his side and laid a hand on his shoulder
“come now, let me see”
lowering his hands to his side, Oryk turned to face her with a grimace, his eyes puffy and red
“Archons above, Oryk,” Cyrene cursed. “You should know better than to taunt a dryad”
as the words left her mouth, the band on her wrist suddenly tightened and the half orc gave a small yelp of pain
glaring at her through bloodshot eyes, Oryk gave the cleric a venomous look
“and you should know better than to speak out of line”
Cyrene’s hands fumbled at the metal around her wrist, refusing to meet the dwarf’s cruel gaze
the cuff continued to coil and squeeze; writhing like a living being as Cyrene frantically whispered a foreign chant beneath her breath
the words seemed to appease the magic item, and it loosened its grip in response
witnessing this cruel display of discipline, the twins began unconsciously massaging the band around their own wrists; as if reminiscing on a similar experience
shaking the pain from her arm, Cyrene set to work curing Oryk’s ailment, uttering a slew of healing spells
with his eyesight restored, Oryk sheathed his weapon and pushed past Cyrene, wandering into the trees
with little other choice other than to follow, the group set off after him
the party walked for some time before a sound other than buzzing insects and murmured curses reached their ears
a low, rumbling that echoed through the trees. Like a dull droning that came in ebbs and flows
once more the group came to a stop, and before Oryk could even turn to look towards the twins, they had already begun to move
creeping forward with the lightest of footsteps, Maia and Iris stealthily approached the sound, deftly avoiding any stray branches or betraying stones
the droning grew louder and louder, until the pair had stopped just shy of its source
peering around a trunk with sharp blue eyes, Maia scanned what lay ahead
the trees parted around an ancient oak, its roots deep and its branches tall
a hollow sat about half way up the trunk. A small opening just wide enough to put a hand or two inside
but the tree was not so interesting as what lay beneath
coiled around the trunk was a creature with a long, serpentine body
its scales, green and flecked with brown, were hard and interlocked like shields in a phalanx
its head, immense and filled with razor sharp teeth, lay curled just below the hollow of the tree
the low rumbling emanated from the monster’s chest, as it uttered a long, prolonged snore
Maia’s jaw tightened and her eyes flitted over to her sister
Iris’ face had gone pale, and her hand had instinctively dropped to grab at the empty sheath on her belt
a prize taken by their employer
the twins locked eyes, and shared a moment of profound fear
wetting her suddenly very dry lips, Maia gestured back towards the trees and Iris nodded in silent agreement
the two stealthily retreated, keeping their footsteps light all the way back to their comrades
Oryk almost jumped when the twins materialised beside him, emerging from the darkness without warning
“well?” he hissed, his voice rising above the droning snores. “What did you find?”
Iris frantically gestured for the dwarf to quiet down, as Maia shot a terrified glance back in the direction of the oak tree
only when they heard the low droning of the monster’s snores did the pair relax enough to answer
“dragon”
the word held in the air like a curse
Cyrene’s eyes widened, and had it not been for the band on her wrist, she most certainly would have uttered a prayer
even Oryk’s permanently affixed scowl faded as the blood drained from his face
when he finally spoke, he did so with no semblance of his usual condescension
“...how big?”
“8 meters,” Iris answered. “No more than 12”
Oryk nodded, his brow knitting together as he dropped into a crouch
“a juvenile,” he thought aloud. “Hasn’t reached full adulthood. Scorch marks?”
“none that we could see”
“good. Then either it’s too young to breathe fire, or it spits poison”
his eyes narrowed to points as he mulled things over in his head
the group kept quiet, forced to listen to the distant, droning snores as their leader considered their options
after a long stretch of time, Oryk took a sharp inhale and straightened his posture
“it’s asleep?”
his eyes shifted to Maia, and the half elf tensed
“we think so but…”
“we don’t know for certain,” Iris quickly interrupted. “We’ve never encountered a dragon before. We should call off the mission and come back more prepared”
a deadly silence fell over the group as the dwarf went still
“call off the mission?” he repeated
his voice was calm, but the words held a distinct edge to them
like the blade of a meticulously sharpened knife
“and since when did you make the calls in this party?”
Maia shot her sister a look, and Iris lowered her eyes
“never,” she answered
“that’s right. Never,” Oryk reiterated, holding the half elf in his steely gaze. “We do things my way, as we always have”
Iris’ clamped her mouth shut and the dwarvish fighter turned to look at his other companions
“unless you have all forgotten what awaits us if we fail? What will happen if we come back empty handed?”
he was met with silence and a slow shake of Cyrene’s head
“failure isn’t an option,” he continued. “If the drakon is asleep, we need to act now”
his gaze shifted to Maia
“so can you do what I need you to?”
the half elf swallowed and tried to slow her racing heartbeat
“I think so,” she meekly answered
“good. The rest of us will wait in position. We’ll flank the tree from three sides and-”
“-I’ll do it,” Iris suddenly interjected
Oryk’s teeth flashed in a grimace before he turned to face her
“I’ll retrieve the objective,” Iris clarified, meeting the dwarf’s gaze
“Maia is quieter,” Oryk bluntly retorted. “She stands a better chance of getting to the tree than you do”
“but with my magic-”
“-your magic that we need for the escape,” he interrupted. “We have a plan, stick to it”
he turned back to the front and began drawing out a rough plan in the dirt with his sica
“-while Maia sneaks in, we hold here to provide support. Once we have what we came for, we leave back through the northern exit”
Iris’ eye twitched, and Maia reached out to drop a hand on her sister’s arm
“Iris-” she quietly started
but her warning went unheeded, and Iris spoke up again
“what’s the point of saving my magic if we don’t get what we came for?” she argued
Oryk spun with a stormy expression, pointing his blade to her chest
“because I said so!” he snapped. “And you will do what you’re told!”
he may have stood half a head shorter than Iris, but in that moment, Oryk felt like a giant, and in the silence of the trees, his voice sounded like a clap of thunder
Iris’ face paled and Oryk realised what he had done
instinctively, the party held their breath; anticipating a monstrous roar, or the crash of falling trees
but after a few tense seconds, all they heard was the rhythmic rumbling of distant snores
the group letting out a collective sigh of relief that cut through the tension like a knife
tension that returned the moment Oryk opened his mouth
“do you want to be sent across the Chronaean?” he hissed. “Do you want to leave your sister alone?”
Iris’ eyes shifted to Cyrene, searching for some glimmer of support
instead, the half orc looked away, leaving the half elf to face their leader alone
“of course I don’t,” Iris mumbled
“exactly,” Oryk spat. “Stay in line, do what you’re told, and keep your mouth shut”
he turned to Maia with an expression that encouraged absolute obedience
“get the objective, and get out. Nod if you understand”
Maia gave a slight jerk of her head
“good. Now get moving”
the dwarf stormed off into the trees, and Cyrene quickly shot up to follow him
Maia and Iris exchanged a look of resignation before joining their trusted comrades

Maia stood in position by the edge of the clearing, mentally projecting her path to and from the hollow
it was a simple job, really
dart across the open ground
jump up to the low branch on the left side
climb over to the main trunk
grab the objective
and do it all again
simple
if it weren’t for the dragon in the way
Maia's heart began to pound in her chest until she felt a hand fall gently across her arm
she turned, meeting Iris' concerned gaze
“you don’t have to do this,” her sister whispered; practically breathing the words into Maia’s ear
“yes I do,” Maia answered, keeping her voice just as quiet. “You heard Oryk. We can’t go back empty handed”
“f*ck Oryk,” Iris cursed. “We’re only here because of him”
in spite of herself, a grim smile lifted the corner of Maia’s lips
it was a rare thing to hear Iris curse
“we could run, you know. Make a break for the mainland”
Maia’s smile dropped in an instant
“Iris, no”
“why not?” Iris replied earnestly. “We can make it. I know we can”
“they’ll catch us. And even if they don’t, what then? We’ve got nowhere to hide. No friends to help us. We’d be on our own”
“we’ve been alone before. We survived, didn’t we?”
Iris’ words were hopeful, but they couldn’t hide the desperation beneath
when Maia didn’t seem convinced, Iris took her sister’s face into her hands
“please don’t do this. I can’t lose you”
Maia’s eyes softened, and she placed her hands atop Iris’
“that’s why I have to do this”
she took a deep breath and tried to put on a half convincing smile
“you don’t have to worry about me. I’ve got this. I promise”
Iris’ thumb traced the scar across her sister’s lip
“I’m older. It’s my job to worry about you”
a frown fell across Maia’s face
“older by 10 minutes”
“and I’ll never let you forget it”
Iris pulled her sister into a tight hug
“don’t you dare get yourself caught”
“when have I ever?”
the two reluctantly parted, and Iris held her sister at an arm’s length
“remember. Once you have it-”
“-run like the Hounds of Chaon are after me”
a smile touched Iris’ lips, and the shadows rose up to swallow her
when they parted, the monk was gone
inhaling a slow, shaky breath, Maia composed herself, and refocused on the tree
30ft to the centre
branch on the left side
over the dragon
down to the hollow
reverse and get out
she exhaled slowly, letting the shake fade from her breath
she had this
Maia broke from the tree line, moving in a swift but stealthy manner
every step carefully laid. Every movement intentional
the dragon’s snores rumbled like thunder, growing louder with each step
before she knew it, she was beneath the low branch
taking a quick stutter step to gain momentum, she threw herself upwards, catching the branch with both hands
thankfully, the branch held firm, and Maia swung her legs up and around it
shimmying along inch by inch, she drew closer to the trunk itself, inadvertently holding her breath as she passed over the sleeping body of the dragon
its breath reeked up close. Like spoiled fruit and vinegar
it took all her strength not to gag
before she knew it, she was at the trunk of the tree and at the next step of her plan
hoisting herself up to a crouched position, she flattened her body against the side of the trunk and began sliding her foot along its length
eventually, she found a suitable foothold and began clambering across to a more central position
the hollow was just beneath her now
and beneath that, the massive head of the dragon
this close, she realised just how easily such a creature could snap her up
with her small frame, she’d be gone in one or two bites
pushing such morbid thoughts out of her mind, she leaned down until her head and arm were low enough to reach inside the hollow
her lungs were beginning to burn from holding her breath for so long, but she dared not exhale
she wasn't sure how good a dragon's senses were, but she wasn't keen to find out either
reaching her arm into the hollow, her fingers touched loose leaves and knotted wood
she pushed a little deeper, searching for any sign of her prize
something cold
something metal
but instead, she felt the hard back of the hollow
frowning, she pressed again, but still felt only the rear of the hollow
had she somehow missed it?
her fingers scrambled around, but continued to feel only wood and leaves
her lungs were really burning now, and she could feel her face flushing with colour from being upside down
regardless, she removed her arm and leaned her head down further, trying to peer inside
in the black gloom of a moonless night, a human wouldn’t have been able to see a thing
but even with her enhanced elvish sight, Maia was granted only the slightest advantage
just enough to make out the shape of the interior and the contents within
dried leaves
knotted wood
a couple insect husks
and nothing else
sure she had somehow made a mistake, she looked again and again
but with each scan, the truth became undeniable
“you will not find what you seek, here”
the dryad’s words echoed in Maia’s head, and with a cold sense of dread, she realised that the spirit hadn’t been speaking rhetorically
the amulet wasn’t here
and with that realisation, Maia’s lungs could hold on no longer
her breath escaped all at once, her awkward position driving the air out in an undignified huff
she clamped a hand over her mouth, but the damage had been done
she had made a sound, however small, and already her breath was mixing with the cool air
time slowed to a crawl as the dragon’s snores came to a stop
she watched in terror as its head, mere inches below her, began to stir
its nostrils flared; drawing breath with a deep, rasping inhale, and its eyes rolled in their sockets
the dragon’s jaws cracked open, revealing a black, forked tongue and rows of fetid teeth
rancid breath assaulted Maia’s senses, making her stomach turn and her head spin
she waited for the creature to open its eyes
to see the tiny morsel dangling helplessly above it
but they never did
to her greatest relief, the dragon remained asleep and blissfully unaware of her presence
relief swiftly turned to dismay, however, as the dragon proceeded to shift; its scales rippling like water across its long, serpentine body
the tree shook violently as the monster scraped against its surface, shearing away bark and causing branches to groan and sway
wrapping her arms around whatever she could find, Maia clung desperately as the shaking threatened to throw her loose
after what felt like an eternity, the vibrations mercifully ended, and the dragon returned to its snoring
but even after the tree had long fallen still, Maia found herself unable move; as if every single muscle in her body had frozen solid
in a moment of clarity, she realised that her hand had found her dagger in the chaos, and that the weapon was now clutched in an iron grip at her side
she almost laughed at the absurdity of the situation
as if a dagger would keep her safe if the dragon had actually awoken
nonetheless, she kept it in her hand, unwilling to relinquish the one defence she had
lifting her gaze to scan the surrounding treeline, she spotted the pale faces of her companions waiting in position. Intently following her progress with their eyes
Iris looked just as high sprung as she was. All but ready to throw herself into the open in order to save her sister
Maia silently prayed that her twin could keep her composure for just a little longer
wetting her incredibly dry lips, the rogue began scaling the tree; taking care to avoid any of the small twigs and leaves that had been shaken loose by the dragon’s shifting
upon reaching her chosen branch she paused, taking a moment to slow her racing heart beat
in spite of everything telling her otherwise, she needed to calm down
stress would lead to mistakes
and mistakes would lead to her death
feeling her muscles relax ever so slightly, Maia continued, stretching her body out to reach the low branch
her feet found purchase, and the rogue began creeping along its length
a few more steps and she’d be home free
“Maia!”
a single word
muffled and distorted, and yet agonisingly loud
Maia’s eyes dropped to the bronze surface of her dagger and saw a young woman’s face staring back at her, their eyes grey and piercing
there was a flash of familiarity in the half elf’s mind, but in that moment, she could barely recall her own name
a million thoughts raced through her mind as her heart pounded like a drum in her ears
one thought, however, screamed louder than the rest
run
Maia’s feet moved before the thought had even finished forming, propelling her from the branch a split second before it detonated into an explosion of jagged splinters
she hit the ground hard, feeling something give in her shoulder
she didn’t have time to dwell on it, as an earth shattering roar tore the world asunder
her feet were under her in an instant, and she broke into a sprint, not daring to look behind her
she knew that if she turned, all she would see is a flash of green scales and a mouth full of fangs closing in to end her life
the air began to reek of rotten fruit and then a body collided with her, throwing her aside
a cloud of noxious fumes ripped through the space she had just occupied, causing grass to shrivel and trees to wither
she felt hands on her arms and shoulders, and then Iris was yelling at her, hauling her to her feet amidst pained racking coughs
they didn’t have time to stop, barrelling through the trees in a mad dash to get away
as furious roars filled the air behind them, Iris stumbled through the underbrush, her legs unsteady beneath her
Maia looped an arm under her shoulder, and now the twins were supporting each other in a tangle of limbs
minutes passed. Or maybe just seconds. And then the two broke from the tree line onto an open road
sea winds rushed up to meet them, and Iris' legs fully gave out as she began greedily sucking in gasps of fresh air
“come on!” Maia urged, trying to drag her sister to her feet
but Iris was of no use now, her eyes bulging and her face flushed with colour
something ripped its way out of the underbrush and Maia turned sharply, instinctively raising the dagger that was still clutched in a death grip
instead of the dragon she was expecting, she found Cyrene and her rhomphaia, halfway through a cut that would have cleaved her in two
recognising each other at the same time, the pair lowered their weapons and turned to the wheezing half elf at their feet
concern flashing across her face, Cyrene dropped to her knees in preparation to cast a spell
before she could begin, however, Oryk emerged from the grove, blood splattered across his hands
“we don’t have time for that. Get her up!”
he raced past them, leading the charge back towards the beach
with a grunt of exertion, Cyrene lifted Iris into her arms like a baby, shoving her rhomphaia into Maia's hands
keeping a wary eye on her sister, Maia followed the half orc as she began jogging after their leader
as they ran, Oryk settled into pace beside Maia, shooting her a questioning look between grunts of breath
“do you have it?”
the half elf's shoulders fell, and she quietly shook her head
“it wasn’t there”
Oryk’s face turned a dark shade of red, and a vein bulged in his head
“what do you mean it wasn’t there?!”
“the amulet is gone. We missed it”
a stream of vile curses flowed from Oryk’s lips, and Maia wisely chose to keep her eyes forward and mouth shut
they reached the beach in record time, and Cyrene carefully laid Iris down into their waiting boat
as Oryk and Maia began pushing the vessel into the rolling surf, the dwarf gave her a hateful glare
“hells spare you when they find out we failed”
“we...haven’t...failed...yet”
Oryk turned his ire on Iris, who lay curled across the edge of the boat trying her best to suck in what air she could
“we...know...where...its...going,” she continued between strained, wheezing breaths. “We...still...have...time...”
leaping into the boat with a splash of water, Oryk waited just long enough for his companions to get in before heaving away with the oars
“we’d better. For all our sakes”
he sliced through the water with powerful strokes, driving them into deeper and darker waters
Maia slunk down beside Iris, taking her sister’s hand into her own
Iris dropped her head onto Maia’s shoulder, and the twins watched as the shores of Kalikos drifted further and further away

First Post: https://www.reddit.com/CradledDnDStories/comments/x8zwpv/athos_1_a_new_world_of_opportunity/
Last Post: https://www.reddit.com/CradledDnDStories/comments/1b2taqi/athos_35_mirror_mirro
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CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
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Reddit Account: u/Thenn_Applicant
Discord Tag: Garin
Name and House: Dorian Merryweather
Age: 49
Cultural Group: Reachman
Appearance: [Dorian's chestnut brown hair has been greying for quite a while, however is short beard retains more color, including a few stray red hairs peppered throughout it. While his features have softened and gained some pudge as he aged past his prime, he remains in overall good shape. This is partly due to his great love of gardening and crop cultivation, which have left his hands and nails rather rough.](Dodin-Bouffant-The-Taste-of-Things-Vest.webp (500×650) (williamjacket.com))
Trait: Numerate
Skills: Avaricious (e), Architect, Administrator, Investor
Talents: Language (High Valyrian) Cooking, Gardening
Negative Trait: N/A
Starting Title: Lord of Longtable
Starting Location: Opening Event
Biography:
It has been said; men grow tired of sleep, love, singing and dancing, sooner than war. As such, it begs the question, what does a man have left when he finally tires of war? In pursuit of an answer, of any answer, one half of Dorian Merryweather’s life was spent. He was the second son of Lord Arthor Merryweather of Longtable. Like many others born in a place of natural abundance, he longed for more, for something greater than a mere provincial estate. The tourneys of Highgarden, the hunts of Horn Hill and the books of Oldtown all called to him, and so he could never ride past his father’s mild and verdant fields fast enough. Dorian counted himself lucky not to be the heir, for that meant he could pick where his future lay, unchained from the uninspiring home of his childhood. Instead it was his older brother, Bennard, who envied his free-flying lifestyle, contriving any excuse to join him on his escapades and agurk lessons and ceremonies he ought to have attended.
Lord Arthor was fairly permissive of this deriliction of duties, as the friendships forced on such journeys were worth more than lessons that could be repeated later, or tasks that could be handed off to lowborn stewards. The boys attended tourneys, balls, hunts and feasts, living the life the bards extolled as the height of reachman’s chivalry. The one time they did not shirk their duties was when their father had the honor of hosting King Mern and his court for a tourney on the Warrior’s day. The Merryweather sons would present the king and his family with silver bowls of dilligrout, a most exquisite stew of capons, white wine and almond milk. They had the joy of tasting it once the Gardeners had their fill, a taste they would never forget. On the tournament field three days later, Mern knighted them both, though Dorian was only sixteen at the time, green as a knight could ever be.
Five years later, as news of Aegon Targaryen and his early conquests spread, the lords of the Reach were summoned to Goldengrove, where they found a veritable forest of Westermen’s banners being planted beside their own. The fall of the Storm Kings had led to a whirlwind of diplomacy between the houses of Gardener and Lannister. The plan was presented to the lords with the two kings sitting beside one another on the dais as though they were brothers. They held up Aegon’s letter of demands, scornfully reading it aloud and then proceeded to tear it up to a roaring acclamation from the hall. Standing there before the hall, Mern could hardly be called the Warrior incarnate. There stood a man well past his prime, old enough to be a grandfather and with no great victories to his name, in battle or on the tourney field. All the same, this man, whom they called their king, always seemed to know exactly what to say to win someone over. If he’d declared war on hell itself that evening, the Merryweather brothers would probably still have marched off with him when the next morning dawned. Bennard and Dorian shouted as loud as anyone, death to the foreign upstart. That evening were betrothed to westerwomen they’d never met before, made plans for a real battle, which they had never fought in before, and drank, ate and sang as though the night would last forever. House Merryweather was not able to secure a command, yet King Mern remembered his stay at Longtable fondly. He gave Bennard and Dorian a place in the vanguard, and even adorned Bennard with a brooch of the order of the green hand the morning before the army Goldengrove, a momentous honor which Bennard would cherish for the remainder of his days. He did not have many left, as it turned out. The Field of Fire began like a dream, as the two brothers rode off at the break of dawn, two out of five thousand sets of gleaming armor atop proud warhorses. By the end of the day it had become a nightmare. Caught up in the maelstrom of battle, Dorian did not see the moment when their loss was assured, but the Gods know he could hear it, the creeping, hungry flames that descended on the reachmen like an army of its own. As hundreds were broiled inside their steel plate and thousands more choked on the inferno’s horrible vanguard of black smoke, Bennard and Dorian broke and fled. They were not far behind the retreating Loren Lannister in their escape, but half a minute made all the difference. The lines of fire fanned out, hunting more living things to devour, and engulfed the two brothers. Dorian could feel how the flames spread from his surcoat to his undershirt, all the way down to the hairs on his chest, beginning to sear his skin. In a desperate act he threw himself in the Blackwater, and would have perished if not for the shoddy work of his squire that morning, which left him able to tear off his plate before he could sink. With bloodied, burn-marked fingers, he clung to the roots of a tree by the riverside, water up to his chest. He was retrieved after some time, how long he could not say. For the next two moons his mind was adrift, distracted from his pains by milk of the poppy. The next two were far worse, as he grew more lucid and realized the extent of the damage. A burn-mark stretched from his right thigh, all the way up his chest and left bicep to the apple of his neck. Many times over, flakes of dead or dying skin had to be peeled off by the maester as the scabs kept bursting with blood and clear liquid. By the end of that year he was able to walk again, though the burn mark would leave a feverish red mark across the front of his body, his new skin settling into twisted lines.
Bennard was far worse for wear, alive yet burned all the way to his face and crippled from a fall off his horse. His nose and ear-lobes had to be cut off, too burned to save, and even his eyelids were permanently scarred, unable to sprout new lashes. The more lucid Bennard became, the deeper his sorrow. Eventually he began refusing food. The new lord of Longtable would not eat anything his cooks set in front of him. In spite of his ever present pains, Dorian began going to the kitchens, reprimanding the cooks for their failings. He knew his brother well and knew his palette, and began ordering them to make his brother’s favorites. When he felt they were making mistakes, he interrupted their work himself. He was a stranger to the kitchen, yet would criticize how things were cut too roughly, spiced too little or too much. He was a terror to the cooks, yet they could not refuse him.
His attempts to intervene were however hampered by a newfound aversion to heat. The sound of the hearth, of boiling and searing, the general sense of warmth around him made him nauseous and caused his movements to seize up. Still, he went to his brother’s bedside every day, and afterwards he forced himself back to the kitchens. His sister, Lydia, tried to stop him at first, but soon found her protes fell on deaf ears, and so joined him, if only to leash him in when he went too far. Finally, there was only one dish they hadn’t tried; the dilligrout they’d once served to the late King Mern. Every time it was made, it came out wrong. It soon turned out the cook who had served them that evening six years ago had since retired, and his exact method had never been recorded or taught to anyone else. Dorian would first invite the man to Longtable, then summon him with armed knights when invitations were refused.
Theomar, the man who appeared before him, was a sorry sight, looking frightened and confused as he was taken to his old workplace. It was explained by his sons that he’d been growing senile even six years ago, often snapping at the kitchen maids under him when his memory failed him. Since then he’d gotten worse, seldom eating, let alone cooking. Something in the old man’s eyes did seem to brighten for a moment when the sounds and smells of his old kitchen surrounded him, and Dorian ordered him to make dilligrout. Before long that faint spark had been drowned out by tears. He would start boiling capon or crushing almonds, only to leave the job half-done whenever he had to fetch something new. Serving maids were put at his disposal to bring him ingredients, yet an ingredient ordered would be met with a reprimand as he seemed to forget which dish he was making every few minutes. Finally Dorian snapped at the man, grabbing him by his collar and shouting accusations of treason against House Merryweather. By the time Lydia could restrain him and try to apologize, the man was a wreck on the floor. After watching it for a while, waiting for the man to get up and continue his work, even Dorian was overcome by pity and shame for what he’d done. The old cook was praying to the gods, begging forgiveness for his failings. Dorian began to realize he’d broken a great man down and would himself beg forgiveness. He offered the man his old cook’s quarters back for the rest of his life, and promised his sons that his maester would tend to the man in his old age, that he would be fed from Longtable’s stores.
At this point, he resolved to make the dilligrout himself. Through it all, Bennard was barely clinging to life, or rather being tethered to it by the will of others. He could only be fed when drugged down by the milk of the poppy, and the more often it was used, the less effective it became. Every day Dorian braved the kitchens, yet he could not recreate the flavor of that wonderful night. It was by the grace of the gods, perhaps with Theomar as their vessel, that Dorian would even come close. The old man could no longer cook, but over time he began to wander into the kitchens and sit down on a chair. At first Dorian thought the man only sought the warmth of the hearth for his weary bones, yet he discovered it to be more than that. Theomar’s eyes were like clouded glass, yet they brightened every now and then, hearing almonds being ground, smelling capons searing in fat, as though it was stirring the kitchenmaster of yore back to life. Eventually Dorian began to walk up to the old cook with his ingredients, bidding him to smell or taste small portions. Sometimes he got simple instructions out of it, ‘too coarse’, ‘too sour’, ‘underdone’. Som times a mere nod or frown was all Theomar managed. Over the course of a couple of days, Dorian put together one final attempt to get the dish made rightWhen he arrived in Bennard’s chamber, he was met with a look which brought forth discomfort that no flame could produce in Dorian. Plainly, raspingly, his brother asked him why he wouldn’t let him die. It was easy, Bennard reasoned. All Dorian needed to do was wait and become lord. The words almost made Dorian throw the dilligrout on the floor. Almost. He placed two bowls on Bennard’s table, the dilligrout and one brimming with milk of the poppy. Dorian told his brother to make his choice. If he sought death, Dorian would let him, but he would not hear that it was an easy thing, watching his brother die. That evening, the milk of the poppy was carried away by the maester, the empty bowl of stew taken to be washed in the kitchens. From then on, Bennard ate what his brother brought him without complaint. He lasted just into the new year, dying on its tenth day. In the predawn gloom of the twelfth, Theomar died in his sleep
Dorian took up his lordly task joylessly. His old wanderlust returned, spurred by the horrible memories that now stained Longtable and the reach itself in his mind. The final straw came when their new Tyrell overlords, insisted on him marrying a lady from a dornish house. His previous betrothal had fallen through, as the parents of his western bride had not wished to draw the ire of the Targaryens by maintaining an old alliance meant to oppose them. Instead of obliging, he boarded a ship from Oldtown going east. It stopped only briefly in Planky Town before going to Tyrosh. Noting him to be a nobleman, a few of the city’s wealthy men would host him for a while, though they quickly lost interest when his lack of knowledge of trade became apparent. After that, he spent time in the markets and squares where the common people lived. His old curiosity was piqued, and he decided to embark on a quest of learning, fashioning himself another Lomas Longstrider. He moved on to Myr, and the experience was much the same in broad strokes, a few rich men showed interest and quickly lost it. As he’d visited the dye markets he went to see the city’s famous artisans at work. One thing was notably different, he met a Tyroshi woman with green-dyed hair, going by the name Maryah. She was a trader, and the two had taken the same ship to Myr. She had been to Myr before and showed him many of its secrets. They spent an entire day in one of the vast delicacy markets so she could show him the many tastes of the city. Having no plans in advance, he asked where she was headed next.
Without a second thought he would join her on a journey to Lys. He soon understood it to be a test. It was not long before she teased him, speculating he’d only joined her for a chance to see the famous pleasure houses. Evening after evening they stayed in the city and Maryah would tease and test him over the matter. Finally he told her he’d renounce his betrothal for her, that there was no one else in his eye. She laughed, replying he would not have to. The next morning, Dorian awoke to find that she was already up, the green washed from her black curls. Maryah had in fact been Joanna Dayne, his dornish bride to be, having traveled the same route as him ever since his ship stopped at Planky Town to refill its food and water. She was already quite familiar with the three closest free cities, having served as a dornish envoy on behalf of its spice traders. As they planned their return to Westeros, Joanna asked him what else in the world he wanted to see. Within a few moons of being wed, they left Westeros, not to return for three years.The journey was what his mind needed, away from the Reach, its knights and tapestries, hunts and tourneys. Ultimately, the lords and knights of his homeland, for all their songs and poetry, lived every day in preparation for war, frivolous though the preparations were. Joanna showed him a different world, the remnants of Old Valyria. War was to be sure inescapable. Wherever they went, there were soldiers, tapestries, contests of arms, and yet the cities housed something else as well, a boundless potential for creation, commerce and growth.
Thanks to Joanna Dayne’s knowledge their stays became far better planned, and they could enjoy the hospitality of wealthy locals far longer. She knew how to talk about the spice trade and similar matters, and Dorian began to pick up on it. On their second stay in Myr, he procured a great deal of fine parchment and began taking notes, everything from negotiation tactics and the prices of cloves or red peppers to court customs, as well as more eclectic pieces of knowledge, details of running an eastern estate, descriptions of technological marvels he had never seen in Westeros, and ingredients in the local food. By the time they neared Qarth he had quite the list of recipes, among other things. There he was even able to learn a few all the way from Yi Ti, as some local cooks catered to merchants from the Golden Empire. On their journey home they’d end up taking the opportunity to see the newly made port of King’s Landing. By that time, a third member had joined their journey, their infant daughter Florys. Having left Longtable in the care of his sister and steward for three years, Dorian finally accepted the responsibility of running his ancestral home.
Longtable was considered to rule over some of the best lands in the Reach, ideally situated along the river with abundant soil which could provide two grain harvests in a year. Having seen the estates which supplied the great cities of the east, Dorian was all too aware of its comparative shortcomings. He found that the abundance of the land had a counterproductive effect, breeding complacency and carelessness. From his grandiose tour of the east, he went on a painstaking tour of his own lands, trying to get an overview of everything he ruled over. He paid the citadel a fee to send him half a dozen maesters in training for a season. These young men, literate and numerate, would serve his own maester in conducting a survey of the land, giving Dorian account of all resources at his disposal as lord. The results were quite varied.
Some peasants were found to have remarkable agricultural insights which they had no way of writing down, entirely reliant on passing the knowledge to their children. Knowing the risks of such a method of transferring knowledge, Dorian ordered such insights recorded. In other places there were farmers and communities who were unwittingly exhausting their soil. Instances of lack of fallow land, excessive grazing by cows and lack of crop rotation were also made note of, followed by edicts against such heedless practices. Septons, sheriffs and tax collectors were given written copies and were obliged to read them to the peasantry wherever it was deemed necessary. It also became part of the obligations of farmers to plant a set amount of clover in their fields and pastures, a practice some had taken up on their own but which had already become a standardized law among the estates belonging to Myr and Volantis. Irrigation was expanded and land inheritance was reformed to prevent the splitting of fields past a certain threshold.
Lord Dorian was not always successful. Some eastern ideas had been useful innovations which improved conditions across the board. In time he learned that the peculiarities of the westerosi system were sometimes necessary for the sake of stability, not merely the misshapen fruits of ignorance. His attempt to enclose part of the common lands proved abortive, as it nearly caused a peasant rebellion. A procession of aggrieved smallfolk headed for Longtable had to be dispersed by knights, armed with wooden clubs to prevent needless bloodshed.Two men were hanged and five sent to the wall, but the reform was thereafter abandoned, leading the populace to calm down. Dorian was not much of a military leader and had not wielded weapons since the Field of Fire. He became aware of his need to bolster his forces, a notion reinforced by the establishment of the Black Roses not long after his return, and again with the Kingswood Catastrophe
In the meantime, he and Joanna raised a family together. Three more daughters would be born healthy, with a couple of miscarriages and a stillbirth in between, also a daughter. Their travels did not entirely come to an end. In 13 AC they would tour the northern free cities of Norvos, Qohor, Pentos, Braavos and Lorath, which they had missed on their original journey. The lion’s share of 17 AC was spent on a journey to the Summer Islands. At other times they would make shorter journeys around the Seven Kingdoms, where they felt more secure in bringing their older children along. Whether it was visiting Joanna’s family in Dorne, tourneys and feasts in the Reach and West or even one trip to see the wall, a nameday wish by Florys, they were often on the move. Like most of their peers, they frequented Oldtown and Highgarden
The growing rift between the two queens and their children was a situation Dorian would watch with dread in his heart, remembering keenly how a generation of young men had been brought to the field of fire. To his mind, the Targaryen rule ought not go to waste. Like Valyria of old, it had begun with fire and blood, yet similarly peace and prosperity had followed in its wake. If only the dragons could stand united, perhaps another long peace like the one the Freehold once enjoyed could again be established. If not, another century of blood was upon them. Under Dorian, Longtable became a place where he sought to bring together people from across the kingdoms and forge unity over the dinner table, an attitude which somewhat vexed and confounded his more militaristic daughter and heiress, Lady Florys. Even amid her questioning of the viability of his peaceful ways when surrounded by those who would make war, a terrible sight would steel his resolve, watching the Mander burning green, every bit as terrible as the flames from twenty one years prior. That night he made a simple vow, never again.
The League of the Cornucopia, he would name his little group, a gallery of lords and ladies whose acquaintances he’d made over the years. With these fellow gourmets he would share the culinary knowledge he’d gleaned from his journeys in the east and west. Most unusual for a lord of his rank, Dorian came to spend a great deal of time in his kitchens, testing out recipes himself. On occasion, the dishes he served to his guests for these small, intimate gatherings would be the work of his own hands. The membership did vary from time to time, both based on who could make it and who he sought to bring together. Rather than a fully closed circle, the League is more like a form of feasting, only it’s done for a much smaller crowd, without the public spectacle. Such occasions allowed for more refined foods which did not need to be served to hundreds and kept constantly warm over the course of hours like some common tavern stew. It also opened up an arena of more intimate diplomacy and negotiation for those who sought it, hosted on neutral ground by a lordly mediator, free from prying eyes.
Timeline:
25BC: Dorian is born, second in line to Longtable
24BC: His sister Lydia is born
9BC: House Merryweather hosts House Gardener for a tourney and feast. Dorian and his older brother Bennard serve the dish of honor to King Mern Gardener and his family. During the subsequent tourney, Mern knights both boys, despite their inexperience and lack of victory in the tourney
9BC-2BC: Dorian spends much time travelling the reach, attending events
1BC: Dorian and Bennard fight in the vanguard at the Field of Fire. Both are burned, Bennard far more severely than Dorian. Lord Merryweather is killed. Traumatized by the battle and his new maimed body, Bennard starts refusing food. Dorian desperately tries to re-create the dish they served King Mern eight years ago. The cook who made it has since gone senile, but eventually manages to help Dorian re-create it. He is given a place at court as apology for his mistreatment at Dorian's hands before this occurred.
1AC: Lord Bennard dies at the beginning of the year, leaving Dorian as lord of Longtable. His sister Lydia fulfills her betrothal to House Tarly, becoming lady of Horn Hill. At the prospect of marrying a Dornishwoman on the King's orders, Dorian decides to leave Westeros to put off his marriage. In Myr, he meets a woman calling herself Maryah, claiming to be a Tyroshi merchant. They fall in love and travel to Lys together. There Dorian promises to set aside his betrothal for her, whereupon she reveals herself as Joanna Dayne, his dornish betrothed.
1AC-4AC: Dorian and Joanna wed at Longtable, then depart on a new journey of the east. They reach as far as Qarth before turning back home. In 3AC, on the way back, their first child, Florys, is born while the couple are in Volantis, on the way home. They return via the newly built port of King's Landing.
4AC-8AC: Using knowledge from the east, Lord Dorian embarks on a project of rationalizing the agriculture of Longtable
5AC: Dorian and Joanna have their second child, a girl named Ellyn
8AC: Their third daughter, Desmera, is born
13AC: Dorian and Joanna spend a year travelling the northern free cities
14AC: Their fourth and final daughter, Gwin, is born
17AC: Dorian and Joanna undertake a journey to the Summer Islands with their children
23AC: The aftermath of the battle of Stonebridge brings back memories of the Field of Fire, as the Merryweathers watch burning slag run down the Mander
25AC: The Merryweathers travel to the celebration of the maturity of Aegon's sons
Family Tree:
Arthor Merryweather (father, d.1BC)
Cerelle Merryweather (pending family connection) (mother, d.20AC)
Bennard Merryweather (brother, d.1AC)
Lydia Merryweather (sister, b.24BC)
Glendon Merryweather (uncle, d.1BC)
Myrcella Pommingham (aunt, d.22AC)
Leo Merryweather (cousin, b.13AC)
Joanna Dayne (wife, b.26AC)
Florys Merryweather (daughter, b.3AC)
Ellyn Merryweather (daughter, b.5AC)
Desmera Merryweather (daughter, b.8AC)
Gwin Merryweather (daughter, b.13AC)
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Auxiliary Character:
Name and House: Florys Merryweather
Age: 23
Cultural Group: Reachman
Appearance: [A short, muscular woman with wavy black hair, normally worn in a bun. She has high cheekbones and a proud demeanor. Her rigid strength stands in contrast to the more relaxed nature of the Merryweather court, one she finds overly lax and casual](0_0.png (896×1344) (discordapp.com))
Trait: Hale
Skills: Swords (e), Essosi Blademaster
Talents: Dancing, Fishing, Cooking
Negative Traits: N/A
Starting Title: Heir to Longtable
Starting Location: Opening Event
Timeline:
3AC: Florys is born in Volantis, while her parents are on their way home from Essos
10AC: Florys starts training under Saathos Trevelyan, her father's Master at Arms
13 AC: She joins her parents on a tour of Pentos, Braavos, Norvos and Qohor
17AC: She travels with her parents to the Summer Islands
19AC-23AC: As she comes of age, Florys becomes more critical of her father's desire for peace, viewing it as increasingly far-fetched amid the increasingly controversial regency and the impending succession dispute. She resolves to make the kinds of connections her father seems unwilling to, in case of war
25AC: She accompanies her family to the celebrations
NPCS:
Ser Leo Merryweather (Age: 37, Archetype: Magnate) Lord Merryweather's first cousin, he has become an indispensable agent in the daily running of Longtable. Despite his foppish demeanor and aparent laziness, he is highly capable and loyal in his task of increasing his family's fortune. He remains happily unwed
Saathos Tevelyan: (Age:48, Archetype: Master at Arms) The son of a Lysene father and a Myrish mother, Saathos initially sought a career in amongst Myr's military officers, however his family's relatively low status proved an impediment to further promotion, later compounded by a dispute with a superior. He met Lord Merryweather in 3AC and eventually travelled West to offer his services five years later, finding his career progress stonewalled in his home city. Well into middle age, he still looks firm and imposing as profesisonal a soldier ought to

i like Warhammer 40k, but 40k doesnt afford you the abilty to let you play your own custom character or faction if it isnt up to certain specs in tournaments(lore strict rules). and running an army battle in dungeons and dragons is overly complicated unless you ignore a bunch of rolls and rules.
i propose a blend of both. who's cannon takes place in the cosmos of perspective.
(you make your own faction cannon. )
each unit type has user generated has one data sheet, each named character you have would have their own data sheet.
the models can be 3-D printed or kitbashed, but they must be at 1/36 scale. essentially one infantry= one of those cheap plastic army men standing at 5 cm tall.
from here, this was typed up before today, by a few months. there is no campaign.
but i would imagine a new fandom in table top roleplay would be born regardless
___________________________________________________________________________________________
WELCOME TO BATTLEPOSTINGS T.T.R.P.G.
A tabletop rpg for diy, model painting, kit bashing, 3-DPrinting, and plastic army battling enthusiasts.
all parts of this game are user generated, with the exception of the rules. Though u/Khorde__the__Husk sent this to a bunch of redditors for help in balancing the game and setting up basic play structure.
Things to note:
· You must have one “advisor” per two warlords in the session. Advisors, act as the game master to make sure no one is cheating. If there is confusion on what kind of weapon a unit has in their hands or equipped to their armor, the Advisor has final say. The advisor is supposed to keep the game fair.
· In theory you could have as many players as you want, but no more than four is recommended because turns consist of multiple phases that are meant to organize the battle strategy for each player.
· Players are encouraged to kit bash, 3-D print, or purchase traditional plastic army men. For the sake of scaling, follow the scaling of the image below. But you must have your own general. It is recommended that your general be unique, make it yours. Have fun.
· Players can make their own campaigns and lore. Such attempts are encouraged. For the purposes of release, you can follow the campaign I have written.
· For any session, you will need a handwritten or typed general’s reference stats Dossier, 1D20, tape measure, and an army of which you will fight with. (painted)
· When rolling on a check, higher is always better. 20 is always a success
· Your armies stats are fixed and defined in this document. Your general’s stats are dictated by the roll of a 1d20. These stats are:
o morale
o Movement speed
o Accuracy
o Health points
o Punch
· Turns are split into phases.
o bombardment
o Movement
o Attack/counter attack
· The different types of units are:
o Infantry
o Armor
o Airborne
o B.A.M.(BIG ASS MACHINES)

· We play at a 1/36 scale. All models are at that scale.

• TERRAIN AND COVER

make your own terrain and cover. kitbashing, 3-D printing encouraged. terrain is the battleground, the floor the pieces and obstacles stand on. obsticles can be anything. debris, nature, etc. obstacles are cover. if an attacking piece can see the defending piece in its entirety, the defending piece is in the open. if the defending piece is partially seen by the attacking
· Ability checks logic below:
20=crit hit/sucsess
1=jam(gun)/woopsie(melee)/crit fail
To succeed , a unit must roll their combined ability score. This is their base ability +general ability. Debuffs such as kickback only are applied to whatever you rolled when you roll for an ability check.
Regardless, the fundamental rules of this game will apply to your creations. these are an assortment of rules designed to keep the game fair and guard against unfair players(referred to as God-Emperors or God-empresses) and hopefully combat power creep.
Now lets expand upon these ideas so you can have fun kit-bashing and army smashing quicker.
GENERAL’S (named character) STAT DOSSIER
Your army’s stats are based on your general’s stat Dossier. The leader of a nation is oft a good indication of how high of a quality their army’s going to be.
The first thing you should write is your general’s name, then write their bio. Their bio includes their background, their homeland, what politics are involved (if any). It is not recommended that you write a novel, you have a game to play. What are the weapons that your general will have on their person? What are their character traits? How will those traits affect how the game is played?
The next thing to do is to make a picture of your General that resembles the piece you kit-bashed for your general to be. It can be menacing, wholesome, serious or whacky. As long as the design choices resemble what your army has for their design and your general’s character traits. It doesn’t have to be hand drawn. A photo of your piece will suffice. no general may have a skill number higher than 16.
ARMY STAT DOSSIER:
what good is a king without a kingdom?
terrible.
each type of unit gets one ARMY STAT DOSSIER. you can have as many scout infantry you want, but you need a dossier on how they are deployed, what weapons they use, and most importantly, THEIR STATS. make sure your unit type description is comprehensive including what styles of combat they are trained for. this could influence your decisions on how you play. give them lore for shits and giggles. no unit may have a skill number higher than 15.
WEAPON STAT DOSSIER
this is the list of weapon types and their ability modifiers.
when attacking bare handed, you go by your unmodified stats.
STATS EXPLAINED AND BORING SHIT
Now comes the part with the dice. You only need 1d20. This is to reduce the confusion.
· Morale
Rolled by 1d20, checked by 1d20 per unit.
Morale is basically moral law. How far will your troops go to follow your orders? If your morale over a given unit is 1, the unit in question is shell shocked for one whole turn, to be marked with a yellow slip. If your unit is shell shocked, it is traumatized to where it cant follow any orders on the next turn. If for some reason the morale hits 0, that unit defects and must be marked with a red token. Units that defect are now under control of your enemy. If defected units hit 0 authority again, it simply dies. Suicide. Cowards way out.
The Morale that your general has over friendly units is base unit morale +the general’s modifier. Your general’s base Morale is the number you rolled the 1d20 for. If for any reason your general’s morale score goes below 0, the general must rally all nearby troops (within 30cm) to protect the general for one turn on the next turn. If your general’s morale hits zero, you get shell shocked, and your general cannot take action for one turn and if your general was within line of sight of any other allied unit, the observing unit cannot take action either.
· Movement Speed
Rolled by 1d20, measured by cm on a measuring tape or meter stick because inches suck.
Movement speed is how much ground a given unit can cover. Unless your object has a punch score higher than the hp of an obstacle, or can fly, you will have to go around the obstacle. There are exceptions. If the obstacle is below the knee of an infantry unit, the infantry or whatever can climb over at the cost of the individual unit climbing modifier.
The base movement speed of your general influences the movement speed of your troops. To find a troops total movement speed:
Your unit’s base movement speed + your general’s base movement speed = total troop movement speed. See army stat dossier or named character stat dossier.

· Accuracy
Rolled by a 1d20, checked by 1d20 per unit
Accuracy must be rolled every time a unit attacks an enemy unit.
Accuracy is basically the chance of your selected troop hitting their targets. Different weapons and vehicles have different accuracy modifiers(aka kickback or x-range), and different types of troops have different base accuracies. Accuracy can affect enemy/friendly Health points or morale. If a shot hits near enough to a troop, or makes a kill close enough to another troop, the troops affected must undergo a morale check with the exception to nearby friendlies of any troop who gets an enemy kill.
Explosives and artillery have an area of effect. any troop within the inner blast radius (with the exception of troops behind sufficient cover) is dead. Any in sufficient cover, or within the outer blast radius must make a morale check. Sufficient cover is a piece of the environment which has an assigned hp that is higher than the punch of an explosion.

Small arms fire requires line of sight for targeting. The path of bullets is a straight line, keep this in mind when deciding collateral damage. Friendly fire is a thing and it is a war-crime. If you want to play nightmare mode, your general gets summoned to a military court tribunal and executed if three friendly troops or more die as a result of friendly fire that occurred by your command.

Melee combat can only be conducted during movement phases. If its melee vs gun there is the variable of line of sight. If the melee unit is within line of sight, the gun unit has advantage. If the melee unit is outside of line of sight of the gun unit, the melee unit has advantage.
To find your troop’s accuracy:
general’s base accuracy+ troop base accuracy- kickback. The higher the accuracy the better.

· Punch
Punch is how much damage a unit causes to another unit or object should they pass their accuracy check. Different weapons pack a different punch. Remember to add their bonus to the punch check roll.
When attacking an obstacle or object, units must roll against the hp of the object. If the roll lands on a number that meets or beats the hp, the object or obstacle is destroyed.(marked with red sticky note and can be traversed as if the object was destroyed. Bullets pass thru within reasonable trajectories, no ricochet)
When attacking units, whatever is rolled is subtracted from the victim’s hp. The victim can only move at half of their normal movement speed afterward.(treaded, wheeled, and airborne vehicles excluded from the debuff even if they are hit. They are treated as obstacles with the addition of the passed accuracy check requirement.)
· Health points(hp)
Health points are what determines how close your units or general is to kicking the bucket. In any game mode, If your general kicks the bucket, you lose. If you have no units other than your general, you lose and your general must go into hiding. each unit and general may have no more than 10hp. powercreep is bad
UNIT CLASSES
Unit Classes are determined by how big the individual unit is, and how it traverses the battlefield. The smallest and most common all the way to the biggest and most intimidating of units are all fit into several categories by what they look like. To solve disagreements on what class your unit is, the advisor has final say. Disagreements should be easy to avoid if you design your units properly. It would be useful to stick to a theme. Candy punk, steampunk, horror, medieval, sci-fi, and historical designs are all fine, you could even come up with your own. A theme will be better for discerning friendlies from you enemies. At the same time, make your units discernable enough that players and especially advisors can easily determine what classes your units are.
· Your general/warlord, whatchacallit
Your general is the most valuable unit because it is what you have to control your forces. Without a wise and strategic leader, your forces will fall into disarray and you will lose the war. You can only have one general, and you made it yours. Kitbashing and 3D printing would likely be your most common means of gaining a general. They must take resemblance of the general on your general stat dossier they can swim in water terrain for two turns before they drown.
· Infantry
The easiest to acquire and kit bash. This allows for vast hordes of infantry, or small fireteams, or something in between. Find your play style. Your infantry should be as tall as the plastic green army men in the image below. These men and women are the bravest of them all.
they can swim in water terrain for two turns before they drown.
· Armor
Mainly made up of vehicles and smaller mechanical suits, must be land based. Expect tanks, jeeps ,Humvees, calvary mounted animals etc. here is an image I ripped for scale as to the largest example of armor you can have. Not my drawing. Its basically the largest tank ever built replace the man in the image with one infantry and you have your scale. Or 0.283333333 m* 0.283333333 m *0.5m
these machines will break down in water terrain.
· Airborne
Airborne units can only fly. They can drop bombs, airdrop armotroops, and attack up to one target per gun that the aircraft is equipped with(within range) as they move. Their biggest weakness is anti-aircraft weaponry and enemy aircraft weapons. How big can an aircraft be?
2.44 meters. X 2.44 meters by 0.60 meters is your maximum for all airborne units.
any airborne that fly like a plane have a +4 to their movement stat but can only bomb ground units 15 cm in front and attack any unit that is in front of it
anything that flies like a helicopter does not have this buff or debuff, they can shoot at any target, but can only use missiles for up to 15 cm on ground units.
NAVAL VEHICLES
Naval vehicles can be big or small, but they can only operate in the designated water terrain area. they can carry troops, they can fire artillery, depth charges, missiles, torpedoes, and submarines can hide below water for three turns before air runs out. but they can be spotted by sonar. if a submerged vessel is within 10 cm of an enemy surface or submarine vessel, the enemy vessel can act as if they know where the submerged vessel is even if the submerged vessel is still submerged.
· B.A.M. ‘s
Big Ass Machines are basically giant robots and massive land ships. These can be Game breaking depending on how you build them and how big you build them. They can fire upon one target per weapon. how big Can these be? They cannot be more than 1.5 meters tall or take up a ground area larger than 4 meters. Players are not allowed to use functioning motor vehicles including, but not limited to cars, trucks, busses, etc. rule of thumb, if you can ride it, you can’t play it. It might as well be just fan art. The maximum distance these can move at any time is 2000cm. to move these, they must make a special movement check. War machines of that size can get stuck easily, so subtract your general’s movement speed from your final roll on each check. If they are larger than the specified limits, you’ve built a giant immobilized obstacle for one turn.
Mobile terrain essentially is a whole battlefield or obstacle of its own. The biggest difference is that anything other than B.A.M. compatible units that are attached to the B.A.M'S can’t be removed from the B.A.M.'S. Artillery such as main guns can’t move, only rotate. same with S.A.M.S. , C.R.A.M.S., and anti aircraft weaponry.

EQUIPMENT AND ARMAMENT
Guns and RE’S(ranged explosives)Require a reload period(one full turn) every so often. Dual wield is an ability that is only applicable to infantry equipment . dual wield only applies when two identical weapons are in both hands of a single unit. Range is how far a weapon can fire before a debuff is added to your accuracy roll. For every 10 cm beyond the stated range, an x-range debuff of -1 is added.
Overheat can only occur on weapons that are labeled with overheat. Every time a gun with overheat is about to fire , a coin must be tossed. If the coin lands on heads, the gun overheats. Overheating will cause the unit to explode. The explosion will deal 1d20 damage to anyone/anything within a 6 cm radius. You only need to roll once.
Cone is a special debuff. Weapons with cone Can only fire at sequential targets within 25 degrees of original target.
im having trouble with deciding the individual weapon stats. so ive decided that i am going to leave those up to you. (the moment i hear people are getting into fights IRL, i will be putting in an elaboration which will settle all disputes regarding equipment and artillery... and i wont be happy about it.)
players are encouraged to record their battles in battle reports and post it online in their relevant subreddits. if they win/lose, then the player is encouraged to come up with a lore reason for any change in tactics, named characters(generals), or stats.
an army is considered overpowered if they can take out all opponents in as little as 10 turns. they must be nerfed if this happens. dont forget to add a lore reason for this occurrence in the battle report.
unlike overpowered, underpowered armies can be taken out in 10 turns. they must be buffed if this happens. dont forget to add a lore reason for this occurrence in the battle report.
this is sci-fantasy/high fantasy, battles are supposed to be epic and economically exaggerated.
write the name of the weapon, the type of weapon.(melee or gun) and its accuracy and punch modifiers.(bare hands is melee and equal to. magic is gun)
spells must be vetted in good faith by advisors prior to the game to prevent game breakage. spells may not kill units or generals in one blow. spells effects can only last one turn unless its a healing spell. healing spells cannot heal more than 5 health points at a time per unit. write out the spells you have for your units and have them vetted by an advisor, advisor will determine gamebreakability of the spell. if spell is determined to be game breaking, mid game, the advisor will have the offending spell removed and the turn undone. at wich point the offending player effectively must alter their strategy in the spirit of good sportsmanship.) There are three approved arcane focuses, wands, staves, and hand casting, (one must not make them look like the caster is going to punch something, have them hold an orb or something.)
(the moment i hear that people get into IRL fights over spells, i will make a list of approved spells and a LONG LIST of forbidden spells. and no one will be happy. )
THE MOST IMPORTANT RULE
Dont be a dick, be a good sport, and have fun.breaking thegame intentionally is a dick move. advisors are encouraged to post their reports of game breaking spells so it may help me in the event Khorde__the__Husk has to revise the rules.

My last post went over surprisingly well, that said you should check out my new subreddit Talesofzippy for more content, because I'm definitely going to posting in more places around reddit and I'll be cross posting them in the tales sub for more people to enjoy!
With that, I don't remember any good stories about Zippy, but the place I work at is fucking filled with loonies, so tonight I'm going to introduce you to Katniss.
Katniss is about 63, tiny, and absolutely loved to talk about how good her guns are, even if she can't shoot or generally understand how they work. She tried to tell me that her Girsan was a high quality gun because the barrel is pinned in place.
I'm a competitive shooter, I grew up shooting and learning about guns.
When a pistol fires a round, a floating barrel will be pointed at an upward angle at the end of the stroke, while a pinned barrel doesn't. The floating barrel doesn't effect accuracy in any meaningful way because it is held in place by several seers, and doesn't begin to move until well after the bullet is out of the gun.
I tried to explain that, she didn't listen. She also can't shoot. Katniss.
She also wears boomer shirts about "snowflakes" and shares memes about the good old days when you could say whatever you want and be offensive.
This gets funny later.
Katniss and I worked together running gas pumps, and we generally got along great, in fact for a year I considered her to be a friend.
And then my dad killed himself.
I got the call at work and got a ride home as quickly as possible. Katniss was on shift with me and Yawn, who is the most chill person you can imagine.
They were incredible, Katniss broke into my apartment (at my request) and took my shotgun for safe keeping. She also took my keys and made me wait for a family friend to pick me up.
I called the night manager and told him I was going home and why, He offered me a ride.
I came into work three days later and stuck my head into my boss (Elk Daddy's) office. He simply said "how long do you need?"
"Two weeks."
"Okay."
I mention this because Anything less than this is a cancerous work environment. If a manager tries to negotiate with you when you've experienced a true tragedy, they're not a manager, they're a slave driver.
I had severe PTSD, nightmares, the whole shabang, for months I would stand at the desk and hear my mom's voice telling me my dad was dead, the first night back at work I witnessed some dumb janitorial drama (not zippy) and I started smelling the sickly sweet smell of human brain before I ran home and had my first panic attack.
(I'll tell the story of Elk Daddy, and make good on a promise I made my dad as a bonus at the end.)
Six months passed, my PTSD wasn't even beginning to heal, and she pulled me aside.
"Okay. It's time to stop now."
"Stop what?"
"This, you're in a rut, and you need to get out of it. It's high time you moved on and stopped being sad and moved on. See my sister was in a car accident and went into a coma when I was about 20, and I had a dream about her getting up and walking out of her hospital room and saying "it's about fucking time." The next day her heart gave out and she finally died. It was this freeing thing for me, because I felt like she was finally free of the broken body and the pain."
"Katniss I just don't feel like I'm... There yet. I'm still hurting, and I really don't feel like I'm ready to let him go. Things aren't that easy."
She didn't like that answer.
At the time I just felt broken, and just laid there and took it, but today I'm genuinely angry about it.
I was hurt, and now that I've rebuilt myself I realized how truly broken I was as a person.
She had no right to say anything to me about how it was time to stop. I'm still healing four years on.
That was when we stopped being friends.
Last year I was going through stickers for our local pride, the second one our community has ever had! I had come out as bi the year before, and had a side project that had grown large enough to have a booth at the local event. I was showing off some cool and funny stickers to Yawn, another cashier.
Yawn is great, he has no blood pressure, everything is just really cool and chill, and he really just wanted to be friends with everyone.
Genuinely nice person. I always get him a Christmas gift and he's always grateful, no matter what it is.
I turned around and handed a sticker to Katniss that said "be gay, so crime" with a little picture of a fabulous criminal goose on it.
She took one look at it and just went "No" rather forcefully, so I just backed off and moved on.
The next day my boss, Elk Daddy, calls me over.
"Op, you handed Katniss a sticker yesterday, and I just want to tell you. Stop talking to her. Please. For me."
"She really complained about that?"
"No, she threatened to go to HR because you "assumed her orientation" and tried to give her a sticker."
It is at this point that I'd like to add that Elk Daddy is gay. Like... Really gay. Him and his husband both donate their time and money to pride, and have been instrumental in making it happen. They are the gay uncles that stepped up to be dads for their nephews when Elk Daddy's brother couldn't.
He knows Katniss, and both of us know her HUSBAND.
So. We didn't talk outside of necessary conversations, and haven't really said anything to each other for any reason.... Until I transferred to my current department and ran out of pens.
I walked over to the cashier desk "hey Katniss, can I get a handful of pens? I ran out."
"I gave three to morning shift last night, what happened to those?"
"I don't know, and it doesn't matter, can I get some?"
Yawn walked over to the drawer where we keep the pens and opened it, while Katniss sighs and opens up her drawer and drops a pen on the counter.
"Come on Katniss, I need more than that."
"I don't have that many pens, they're not giving them to us, here, this is all I have."
She angrily throws down two more pins on the counter as Yawn retrieves an entire box of pens from the drawer and begins walking over. She sees him and motions for him to stop."
"Don't fucking bullshit me Katniss, I see Yawn with the box. Just give me some pens."
She drops six more down on the counter, I take them and walk off. "Thank you."
Ten minutes later she comes over to the deli and slams a box of pens down on the counter for me
"Don't ask me for pens again."
"Wouldn't have it any other way."
She then told the MOD that I cussed her out. I told my side, and several people in the management chain pointed out that she wore tee shirts under her uniform that said more offensive things, one of them even saying "don't fucking bullshit me."
She is no longer allowed to wear her tee shirts.
She's also had it pointed out to her that she says "don't fucking bullshit me" all the time, and management has gently reminded her that she should not swear.
A few weeks ago she very dejectedly told me that she was done trying to help people, and I had to bite back a "good, we don't need it."
And here we are... End of another post about the weird boomers I work with.
BONUS STORIES!
As for Elk Daddy.
My boss has only ever taken his husband out hunting one time. When they did, they ended up trekking across the country on deer trails and through the brush. After 12 hours of being dragged through the brush and not shooting anything, his husband said something to the effect of "I hate this. I can't keep up with you and you just disappear all the goddamn time." He took my boss's phone, logged in, and yells "in fact HEY SIRI, FROM NOW ON CALL ME ELK DADDY."
nickname earned. He has it monogramed on his wallet.
And finally, my dad, who was another Boomer, used to love taking me out camping.
He was an electrical engineer, and was most certainly on the spectrum. He was brilliant in his own way, but absolutely unhinged when it came to teaching things.
A lecture from my dad could cover cleaning the stove (with diagrams on proper wiping techniques) to the finer points of building and firing a nuclear weapon. (With math included. No mercy.)
He tried to teach me calculus when I was six. It didn't work.
Anyway, on this particular camping trip he pulled me aside and said "op, I want you to make me a fire using nothing but two sticks, your knife, a match and the chainsaw"
Now. I knew where he was coming from, he wanted me to make a fuzz stick. I knew because he had only brought up the topic of making a fuzz stick every night for the past three days of camping. He then very helpfully added "and the chainsaw is a distraction."
Uh huh. Okay dad.
I Start cutting up the wood and making a teepee fire, and I hear a little "hmph" I look up and I see the smile. The grin he used to get as he started planning one of his little lectures. He was picking out the right words, deciding if he needed to demonstrate or just use a pen and paper.
I then opened up the gas tank on the chainsaw, dumped in a tablespoon of gas, lit the match and "whoof"
Fire.
Then the argument began.
"I said you couldn't use gas!"
"You said I could use the chainsaw, that includes the gas tank!"
"The chainsaw was a distraction!"
"Still gave it to me!"
"You cheated!!!"
"How?"
Long pause.
"I won, admit it. I beat you in a way you didn't expect. You will never live this down. I'll tell this story at your funeral!"
And I did. Three years later I tore up my hastily scribbled notes and told a group of the friends, neighbors and coworkers that he knew and loved about the time I finally beat him. We laughed.
I think he'd be proud, and a little indignant.
I miss you dad.

My last post went over surprisingly well, that said you should check out my new subreddit Talesofzippy for more content, because I'm definitely going to posting in more places around reddit and I'll be cross posting them in the tales sub for more people to enjoy!
With that, I don't remember any good stories about Zippy, but the place I work at is fucking filled with loonies, so tonight I'm going to introduce you to Katniss.
Katniss is about 63, tiny, and absolutely loved to talk about how good her guns are, even if she can't shoot or generally understand how they work. She tried to tell me that her Girsan was a high quality gun because the barrel is pinned in place.
I'm a competitive shooter, I grew up shooting and learning about guns.
When a pistol fires a round, a floating barrel will be pointed at an upward angle at the end of the stroke, while a pinned barrel doesn't. The floating barrel doesn't effect accuracy in any meaningful way because it is held in place by several seers, and doesn't begin to move until well after the bullet is out of the gun.
I tried to explain that, she didn't listen. She also can't shoot. Katniss.
She also wears boomer shirts about "snowflakes" and shares memes about the good old days when you could say whatever you want and be offensive.
This gets funny later.
Katniss and I worked together running gas pumps, and we generally got along great, in fact for a year I considered her to be a friend.
And then my dad killed himself.
I got the call at work and got a ride home as quickly as possible. Katniss was on shift with me and Yawn, who is the most chill person you can imagine.
They were incredible, Katniss broke into my apartment (at my request) and took my shotgun for safe keeping. She also took my keys and made me wait for a family friend to pick me up.
I called the night manager and told him I was going home and why, He offered me a ride.
I came into work three days later and stuck my head into my boss (Elk Daddy's) office. He simply said "how long do you need?"
"Two weeks."
"Okay."
I mention this because Anything less than this is a cancerous work environment. If a manager tries to negotiate with you when you've experienced a true tragedy, they're not a manager, they're a slave driver.
I had severe PTSD, nightmares, the whole shabang, for months I would stand at the desk and hear my mom's voice telling me my dad was dead, the first night back at work I witnessed some dumb janitorial drama (not zippy) and I started smelling the sickly sweet smell of human brain before I ran home and had my first panic attack.
(I'll tell the story of Elk Daddy, and make good on a promise I made my dad as a bonus at the end.)
Six months passed, my PTSD wasn't even beginning to heal, and she pulled me aside.
"Okay. It's time to stop now."
"Stop what?"
"This, you're in a rut, and you need to get out of it. It's high time you moved on and stopped being sad and moved on. See my sister was in a car accident and went into a coma when I was about 20, and I had a dream about her getting up and walking out of her hospital room and saying "it's about fucking time." The next day her heart gave out and she finally died. It was this freeing thing for me, because I felt like she was finally free of the broken body and the pain."
"Katniss I just don't feel like I'm... There yet. I'm still hurting, and I really don't feel like I'm ready to let him go. Things aren't that easy."
She didn't like that answer.
At the time I just felt broken, and just laid there and took it, but today I'm genuinely angry about it.
I was hurt, and now that I've rebuilt myself I realized how truly broken I was as a person.
She had no right to say anything to me about how it was time to stop. I'm still healing four years on.
That was when we stopped being friends.
Last year I was going through stickers for our local pride, the second one our community has ever had! I had come out as bi the year before, and had a side project that had grown large enough to have a booth at the local event. I was showing off some cool and funny stickers to Yawn, another cashier.
Yawn is great, he has no blood pressure, everything is just really cool and chill, and he really just wanted to be friends with everyone.
Genuinely nice person. I always get him a Christmas gift and he's always grateful, no matter what it is.
I turned around and handed a sticker to Katniss that said "be gay, do crime" with a little picture of a fabulous criminal goose on it.
She took one look at it and just went "No" rather forcefully, so I just backed off and moved on.
The next day my boss, Elk Daddy, calls me over.
"Op, you handed Katniss a sticker yesterday, and I just want to tell you. Stop talking to her. Please. For me."
"She really complained about that?"
"No, she threatened to go to HR because you "assumed her orientation" and tried to give her a sticker."
It is at this point that I'd like to add that Elk Daddy is gay. Like... Really gay. Him and his husband both donate their time and money to pride, and have been instrumental in making it happen. They are the gay uncles that stepped up to be dads for their nephews when Elk Daddy's brother couldn't.
He knows Katniss, and both of us know her HUSBAND.
So. We didn't talk outside of necessary conversations, and haven't really said anything to each other for any reason.... Until I transferred to my current department and ran out of pens.
I walked over to the cashier desk "hey Katniss, can I get a handful of pens? I ran out."
"I gave three to morning shift last night, what happened to those?"
"I don't know, and it doesn't matter, can I get some?"
Yawn walked over to the drawer where we keep the pens and opened it, while Katniss sighs and opens up her drawer and drops a pen on the counter.
"Come on Katniss, I need more than that."
"I don't have that many pens, they're not giving them to us, here, this is all I have."
She angrily throws down two more pins on the counter as Yawn retrieves an entire box of pens from the drawer and begins walking over. She sees him and motions for him to stop."
"Don't fucking bullshit me Katniss, I see Yawn with the box. Just give me some pens."
She drops six more down on the counter, I take them and walk off. "Thank you."
Ten minutes later she comes over to the deli and slams a box of pens down on the counter for me
"Don't ask me for pens again."
"Wouldn't have it any other way."
She then told the MOD that I cussed her out. I told my side, and several people in the management chain pointed out that she wore tee shirts under her uniform that said more offensive things, one of them even saying "don't fucking bullshit me."
She is no longer allowed to wear her tee shirts.
She's also had it pointed out to her that she says "don't fucking bullshit me" all the time, and management has gently reminded her that she should not swear.
A few weeks ago she very dejectedly told me that she was done trying to help people, and I had to bite back a "good, we don't need it."
And here we are... End of another post about the weird boomers I work with.
BONUS STORIES!
As for Elk Daddy.
My boss has only ever taken his husband out hunting one time. When they did, they ended up trekking across the country on deer trails and through the brush. After 12 hours of being dragged through the brush and not shooting anything, his husband said something to the effect of "I hate this. I can't keep up with you and you just disappear all the goddamn time." He took my boss's phone, logged in, and yells "in fact HEY SIRI, FROM NOW ON CALL ME ELK DADDY."
nickname earned. He has it monogramed on his wallet.
And finally, my dad, who was another Boomer, used to love taking me out camping.
He was an electrical engineer, and was most certainly on the spectrum. He was brilliant in his own way, but absolutely unhinged when it came to teaching things.
A lecture from my dad could cover cleaning the stove (with diagrams on proper wiping techniques) to the finer points of building and firing a nuclear weapon. (With math included. No mercy.)
He tried to teach me calculus when I was six. It didn't work.
Anyway, on this particular camping trip he pulled me aside and said "op, I want you to make me a fire using nothing but two sticks, your knife, a match and the chainsaw"
Now. I knew where he was coming from, he wanted me to make a fuzz stick. I knew because he had only brought up the topic of making a fuzz stick every night for the past three days of camping. He then very helpfully added "and the chainsaw is a distraction."
Uh huh. Okay dad.
I Start cutting up the wood and making a teepee fire, and I hear a little "hmph" I look up and I see the smile. The grin he used to get as he started planning one of his little lectures. He was picking out the right words, deciding if he needed to demonstrate or just use a pen and paper.
I then opened up the gas tank on the chainsaw, dumped in a tablespoon of gas, lit the match and "whoof"
Fire.
Then the argument began.
"I said you couldn't use gas!"
"You said I could use the chainsaw, that includes the gas tank!"
"The chainsaw was a distraction!"
"Still gave it to me!"
"You cheated!!!"
"How?"
Long pause.
"I won, admit it. I beat you in a way you didn't expect. You will never live this down. I'll tell this story at your funeral!"
And I did. Three years later I tore up my hastily scribbled notes and told a group of the friends, neighbors and coworkers that he knew and loved about the time I finally beat him. We laughed.
I think he'd be proud, and a little indignant.
I miss you dad.

So recently both the Faerie wings and the Winged Sentinel Seraph got a massive buff by simply allowing their flight mechanic to be active at all times instead of requiring them to spend a resource.
This combined with the mixed races (yes I know they are optional but they are also super fun so it sucks that this ONE thing is what would make me potentially ban it at my table) creates a pretty big problem. As it stands right now, flight is severely overpowered, and it always has been in most TTRPGs, which is why flying races are the most commonly banned in games like DnD.
We all know the classic "pick a ranged weapon and fly above all melee targets" strat. There's really no counter to it besides building your entire campaign around countering it, to the point where the flying player may as well not be flying.
But what about rewarding the player for their choices?: I'm all about rewarding creative and clever ways to bypass obstacles, if anything I wish it happened more! But there is no effort required in "Oh there is a pack of wolves? I'm gonna fly above them and shoot them with my bow. You guys stay back here so there is literally zero risk".
Just use lots of ranged enemies?: While yes you can do this, it significantly limits the narrative potential you have in a fantasy setting. A pack of wolves attacks? Forget about it. A large bear emerges from its cave after the party draws it outside? No, it's actually something else that can fly. No more bears. You saw eeligators in the Adversary list and thought they would make for a cool encounter? Think again. Just look at the actual encounters provided in the one-shot. Imagine the thistlefolk ambushers jump out and everyone just flies up and rains arrows/magic down. What are they gonna do? The vast majority of the adversaries (and even existing environmental effects) currently in the game can't do anything to flying characters, and that may change when the full game is out but it might also be foreshadowing what we should expect.
What about creative ways to counter flight?: Sure, you can come up with creative ways to create scenarios in which something insanely powerful is somehow not that powerful. But how many times can you contrive some way to counter the flying players? What's the point of flight if the only way it can exist is by the universe constantly finding ways for it to not be as useful?
So, what should be done about it?: Simple, there needs to be a dedicated section to flight, as flying can almost be considered a type of condition in this game, like hidden or restrained. If it works exactly how we all think it does, then there also needs to be guidance provided on how to appropriately balance situations and encounters around it, or even better, there need to be some mechanics built in to make flight slightly less abusable. For example: Creatures cannot make ranged attacks while flying.
This is just feedback to avoid falling into the same pit trap as most other TTRPG games have that have races with flight. I think the previous systems that limited the amount of flight time worked better, but a perma-flight ability is fine too if they can figure out a way to properly balance it. Otherwise unfortunately we will need to return to "spend hope/stress to fly for ___ minutes".
Edit: Grammar

CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
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Ever feel like your brilliant content is just not getting the eyeballs it deserves? You might be missing a crucial piece: the hook. A compelling hook is your secret weapon for capturing attention instantly. Here's how you can craft hooks that not only grab attention but also hold it, based on timeless principles from experienced marketers.

1. Start with a Bang! Begin your piece with a statement that sparks curiosity or provokes thought. For instance, "What if I told you that the most successful marketing campaigns shared one hidden secret?" This kind of opening makes the reader pause and think, "I need to know more!"
   
2. Use Numbers or Surprising Facts Numbers help quantify your message and offer a tangible grasp of your topic. A hook like "95% of marketers agree—this strategy triples your engagement" is both informative and intriguing.
   
3. Ask a Compelling Question Questions provoke thought and invite interaction. A question like "Do you know the most underutilized tactic in digital marketing today?" can lead readers to engage with your content to find the answer.
   
4. Paint a Picture with Vivid Descriptions Visual hooks can be incredibly powerful. Describe a scene or outcome vividly to draw readers into your narrative. For example, "Imagine achieving your yearly sales target in just one quarter."
   
5. Leverage Storytelling Start with a brief but engaging story to illustrate your main point. Stories create a personal connection and make your content relatable. "Last year, a small startup turned their last $500 into a $5 million revenue stream. Here's how they did it."
   

Why is mastering the art of the hook critical?
In our fast-paced world, the first few seconds of your content decide whether someone will scroll past or stop and engage. By crafting an irresistible hook, you not only increase the chances of your content being read but also enhance its impact.
We’d love to hear your thoughts or see examples of your favorite hooks! Let’s discuss what you think works and what doesn’t.

CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
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Hybrid Warfare: The Art of Conquest under the Umbrella of Peace
Introduction
The contemporary world is witnessing an era of unconventional conflicts, where the boundaries between peace and war are blurred. Hybrid warfare, a insidious strategy that combines elements of traditional warfare, covert operations, cyber attacks, and propaganda, has become an increasingly prevalent weapon in the arsenal of major powers.
Inspired by the tactics of the NKVD, KGB, and SVR, this book reveals the subtle art of conquering a country without triggering open conflict. The reader will be guided through the labyrinth of strategies for identifying and compromising key individuals, exploiting their vulnerabilities and secrets to gain control over a nation.
Primary Target: Influence
The first crucial step is to identify the most influential person in the target country. Once the target is identified, a meticulous operation follows to uncover their weaknesses, secrets, and loved ones. Children, as symbols of the future and legacy, become priority targets. Neutralizing them, either through direct control or by sabotaging their chances of procreation, represents a crucial strategic blow.
Secret Weapon: Control
The life partner of the target becomes a central figure. Controlling or dividing them through unconventional methods serves to weaken the target's influence and facilitate their manipulation. There are no rules in this hybrid warfare, and any means are permitted to achieve the ultimate goal: conquest.
Infiltration: Eyes and Ears Everywhere
Well-infiltrated intelligence services, similar to Nicolae Ceaușescu's "Securitate", become essential for the constant surveillance of the target and their entourage. Controlling the doctor, the entourage, and anyone who could influence the target is crucial to maintaining absolute control.
"Coughing from the throat."
A Shocking Example: The Doctor and the Child
To illustrate the cruelty and lack of scruples of this type of warfare, let's analyze in detail a particular scenario: the control of the target's child's doctor. Imagine a situation where the child, the symbol of hope and the family's future, falls seriously ill. The doctor, under enemy control, is instructed to conceal the truth about the child's condition, providing a false diagnosis and ineffective treatment. This perfidious action not only endangers the child's life but also destroys the target's trust in those around them, making them vulnerable to manipulation.
Conclusion
Hybrid warfare, with its hidden tactics and ruthless manipulation, poses a real threat to the sovereignty of nations. This book offers a fascinating yet disturbing insight into this type of conflict, revealing the brutal strategies that can be used to conquer a country without triggering open war. An essential read for those who wish to understand the complexity of the modern world and the hidden dangers that can threaten global peace and stability.
The example of the doctor and the child serves as a reminder of the cruelty and lack of boundaries of those who wage hybrid warfare. It is a shocking yet necessary story that compels us to confront the dark reality of this type of conflict.
Another Shocking Example: The Orchestrated Accident
To demonstrate the insidious versatility of hybrid warfare, let's analyze another terrifying scenario: manipulating the doctor treating the target after a serious accident.
Imagine a tragic situation: the target, a symbol of power and influence, is the victim of a violent accident. Rushed to the hospital, severely injured and vulnerable, their fate rests in the hands of the attending physician.
But what if this doctor isn't a dedicated savior, but a pawn infiltrated in the enemy's operation? Under the adversary's control, the doctor receives sinister instructions: to administer medications that, under the guise of proper treatment, will actually trigger a rise in the target's blood pressure, further exacerbating their condition and jeopardizing their life.
This diabolical act not only endangers the target's life, but also serves as a strategic blow. Weakening the target physically and mentally makes them vulnerable to manipulation and isolates them from loved ones who might intervene to protect them.
In the event the target survives, the orchestrated accident could be presented as a mere medical error, a regrettable negligence, not a premeditated crime. The lack of concrete evidence and the controlled doctor's influence would facilitate the concealment of the truth and maintain control over the target.
This example chillingly demonstrates how hybrid warfare exploits human tragedy to achieve political objectives. The manipulation of the medical profession, a symbol of trust and compassion, represents a pinnacle of perfidy, showcasing the utter lack of scruples of those who wage such war.
The story of the orchestrated accident serves as a shocking reminder of the hidden cruelty of hybrid warfare and how it can infiltrate and corrupt even the most noble institutions. It's a dark reality we cannot ignore, forcing us to remain vigilant and fight to defend humanity's fundamental values.

CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
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TL;DR, We are witnessing the formation of a content mediocrity curve that occurs when many options are forced to exist around the same level of power. The system needs to be more integrated with other features so that weapons can be balanced without adjusting their direct level of power. A good way to do this would be tying weapon power to cooldown rate.
 
Horizontal balancing is a good philosophy when aiming for wide array of viable options, but runs into issues when having too few balancing levers. Too many options are forced to exist around the same level of power, as all primary weapons are directly competing for the same spot and role with no external cost or benefit to other systems.
The way Mass Effect 3 approached this issue was with weapon weight. Stronger weapons tended to weigh more and increased your cooldown times. Weaker weapons tended to weigh less, decreasing cooldowns. Helldivers 2 could benefit greatly with an implementation of a similar system. Bringing more powerful, complex weapons eats into your mission budget, making it take longer to get approval for each stratagem use. Bringing weaker options, or even opting to bring two cheap, surplus sidearms, would make stratagem approval faster, reducing your cooldowns.
 
How this could function:

(Note: values shown are for example purposes only. Proper balancing is to be left to the certified balance experts)

 

• Players can equip any two weapons in their primary and secondary slots.
   
  
• Each weapon has a "budget allocation" value.
   
  
• Sidearms no longer have their own slot, but all have a budget allocation of 0 to 10.
   
  
• Base cooldowns are applied at a budget allocation of 100.
   
  
• Every 10 points under 100 increases the rate of stratagem regeneration by 20%. At 0, this would give the Railcannon Strike a cooldown of 70 seconds, down from 210.
   
  
• Every 10 points over 100 decreases the rate of stratagem regeneration by 5%. At 200, the Railcannon Strike would have a cooldown of 420 seconds, up from 210.
   
  

Example budget allocation values:

(examples are multiples of 10 for the purpose of simplicity, actual numbers could have any value)

• 0: Peacemaker
  
• 10: Grenade Pistol
  
• 20: Scythe
  
• 30: Breaker Spray and Pray
  
• 40: Liberator
  
• 50: Sickle
  
• 60: Breaker
  
• 70: Pre-nerf Slugger
  
• 80: Dominator
  
• 90: Scorcher
  
• 100: Pre-nerf Eruptor
   
  

A system like this would greatly increase the room for balancing guns. An overperforming weapon wouldn't need to have its direct power nerfed, as it could be indirectly nerfed by increasing its budget cost. Likewise, an underperforming weapon like the Scythe wouldn't need to be buffed, possibly causing powercreep and stepping on the toes of other weapon, when it could instead be a cheap backup weapon for when you want a little more oomph than what a sidearm offers. This would also offer people the option to intentionally take weak weapons in exchange for a greatly increased rate of stratagem availability.
 
Addressing possible issues:

Wouldn't this be a significant buff to player power?

Yes. That's naturally going to occur when making a more complex system. The solution would be to adjust the difficulty around this. Ultimately the goal should be for a balanced game with more interesting loadout decisions.

Couldn't one player just bring good weapons for other players who bring pistols, intentionally respawning multiple piles of weapons?

Sure, but that costs lives and something similar already exists with support weapons and backpacks. There are other ways around this as well, such as making it so you can only carry spare ammo for weapons you bring. Sure, you could pick someone's Eruptor up off the ground, but you'd only have what's left in the magazine to shoot.
 
Helldivers 2 is an amazing game that is going to be choked out by the deluge of mediocre content we will get unless something changes. There's room in the design space for overpowered primary weapons that carry appropriate costs for running them. Arrowhead needs to see this iceberg they are slowly approaching and shift course.

My wife's sister Eva has always been the center of attention. She is very self centered and is obsessed with romanticizing her life to her own detriment. She refuses to take a job that she isn't passionate about and has bounced around various countries traveling for the last 8ish years. This wasn't a huge deal, but several years ago, she was impregnated by and married a 20 year old guy.
My wife has always been the responsible one in her family. She raised her other nephew for the first few years of his life because her other sister Dina had severe postpartum depression. Additionally, her parents went through a messy divorce and she had to care for her sisters a lot growing up, so she’s “the responsible one”.
Eva always says that no one has ever helped her and she's always had to do everything herself. That is far from true. She is the kid’s primary caregiver, so I’ll give her credit, but she is by no means raising him alone. She relies heavily on her family for money and childcare. Eva’s father regularly flies her out to see him, paying for everything and also sends her money. Her husband’s family also sends her money monthly. Her mother flies out to her and assists with childcare every month or so for sometimes weeks at a time. My wife flew out when she gave birth, helped with caring for both her and the child afterwards, and none of them to my knowledge ever received a thank you. She thanks them by constantly telling them they need to step up and do more. It's never enough. I'm fully convinced that her family could all care for her 24/7 and she would still tell them they weren't doing enough because she’s fundamentally unhappy and blames everyone else for it.
Her relationship with the child's dad has been rocky from the beginning. She doesn't want to be with him, but she also doesn't want him seeing other people. He’s always seemed like an okay dad, though he travels for his job, so he’s gone for days or weeks at a time. Also like I said, he was basically a teenager when they met, so he doesn’t have much in terms of a career or experience. When he’s home, she tells him he needs to work because they need money. When he works she tells him they need him at home. They live overseas so they do have some free childcare, but she says that it’s not enough time to allow her a part time job.
So yeah, things have never been great and it’s no secret I don’t really like being around her. She’s a pleasant enough person to talk to (most of the time,) but she’s such a chaotic presence that any time we’re with her, I’m on edge. Her family feels the same.
Things came to a head recently when Eva’s husband finally had enough and essentially told her that he can’t make her happy and they need to live separate lives and co-parent. Every time my wife visits them, they inevitably end up screaming at each other, so we all think this is for the best. He’s not the best dad, but he’s far from the worst. He’s also pretty self-centered and romanticizes his life similar to her. Now that they’re breaking up though, she’s accusing him of abuse, though I’m unclear what she’s specifically accusing him of. Since she’s started with those allegations, she’ll also backtrack on them, alternating between being angry that her family won’t support her in her abusive situation, and then being angry that he isn’t around more to help and telling them that she needs him home more. It’s also worth mentioning that her definition of abuse has stretched to saying that her friend abused her by giving someone else a job that they were supposed to give her. Additionally, she was previously diagnosed as a teen for being schizophrenic. I don’t know much about schizophrenia, but she definitely has something going on mentally, though to me it’s more what I imagine BPD or bi-polar to look like. She seemingly floats between multiple different versions of reality, and fully convinces herself that whichever version she’s in right now is the only one there is and ever has been. She’s open to therapy which her family has encouraged and said they’d pay for, but she won’t do the work of actually finding a therapist.
So, now she’s in a custody battle with the father which she’s predictably not handling well. He wanted to move into another apartment in their complex and she refused, saying he’ll be too close. Then she’s refusing to give him the two items from their apartment that he wanted to keep for himself. She’s always been very vindictive once she decides that someone has wronged her. When asked to actually draw up a custody agreement that she’ll agree to she won’t, presumably because she prefers shifting goalposts and not having something that people can hold her to.
It’s new drama every day. She’s constantly berating her parents and sisters for not doing enough for them and “siding with her abuser” when they try and do anything productive with the joint custody discussions. Honestly if it wasn’t for her child, I don’t think they’d put up with it, but everyone is concerned for the kid. He’s so sweet and they don’t want him cut out of their lives. They try to walk a fine line of influencing what they can while stopping short of telling her the whole truth, that she’s the one that’s being unreasonable most of the time. Honestly they’re probably some of the few stable presences in the kid’s life, so they want to make sure they stay in it.
My wife has asked what I think, but I don’t have a great answer. I know generally it’s best to not cater to the demands of someone so toxic and unwell, and by not fully calling her on her shit, they’re enabling her to some degree. On the other hand, they’re right that if they did call her on her shit, she would burn them and likely cut them out of the child’s life. Even if the court battle gets nasty, I don’t see her getting less than 50% custody of the kid. She’s been his primary caregiver and while it’s probably not a great environment mentally for him, it’s not anything that the courts would separate a family over. In general, she’s not a bad mom and doesn’t mistreat the kid from what I’ve seen, though she will weaponize him against the father.
All this is taking a mental toll on my wife, but she’s decided to do what she can to ensure the best outcome for her nephew given the circumstances. So she does what she can to try and influence from the sidelines while also walking on egg-shells trying not to piss off her sister too much. It would be much better for her mentally if she stopped interacting and participating in her sister’s drama, but again, there’s the kid to worry about. She’s tried just engaging less and her sister takes it the same as if she’d disagree with her. Anyone have any advice with how to approach this? What can I do to support her?
tldr; wife's sister is unstable and treats her family poorly but they're forced to cater to her to stay involved her her child's life. What do?

My wife's sister Eva has always been the center of attention. She is very self centered and is obsessed with romanticizing her life to her own detriment. She refuses to take a job that she isn't passionate about and has bounced around various countries traveling for the last 8ish years. This wasn't a huge deal, but several years ago, she was impregnated by and married a 20 year old guy.
My wife has always been the responsible one in her family. She raised her other nephew for the first few years of his life because her other sister Dina had severe postpartum depression. Additionally, her parents went through a messy divorce and she had to care for her sisters a lot growing up, so she’s “the responsible one”.
Eva always says that no one has ever helped her and she's always had to do everything herself. That is far from true. She is the kid’s primary caregiver, so I’ll give her credit, but she is by no means raising him alone. She relies heavily on her family for money and childcare. Eva’s father regularly flies her out to see him, paying for everything and also sends her money. Her husband’s family also sends her money monthly. Her mother flies out to her and assists with childcare every month or so for sometimes weeks at a time. My wife flew out when she gave birth, helped with caring for both her and the child afterwards, and none of them to my knowledge ever received a thank you. She thanks them by constantly telling them they need to step up and do more. It's never enough. I'm fully convinced that her family could all care for her 24/7 and she would still tell them they weren't doing enough because she’s fundamentally unhappy and blames everyone else for it.
Her relationship with the child's dad has been rocky from the beginning. She doesn't want to be with him, but she also doesn't want him seeing other people. He’s always seemed like an okay dad, though he travels for his job, so he’s gone for days or weeks at a time. Also like I said, he was basically a teenager when they met, so he doesn’t have much in terms of a career or experience. When he’s home, she tells him he needs to work because they need money. When he works she tells him they need him at home. They live overseas so they do have some free childcare, but she says that it’s not enough time to allow her a part time job.
So yeah, things have never been great and it’s no secret I don’t really like being around her. She’s a pleasant enough person to talk to (most of the time,) but she’s such a chaotic presence that any time we’re with her, I’m on edge. Her family feels the same.
Things came to a head recently when Eva’s husband finally had enough and essentially told her that he can’t make her happy and they need to live separate lives and co-parent. Every time my wife visits them, they inevitably end up screaming at each other, so we all think this is for the best. He’s not the best dad, but he’s far from the worst. He’s also pretty self-centered and romanticizes his life similar to her. Now that they’re breaking up though, she’s accusing him of abuse, though I’m unclear what she’s specifically accusing him of. Since she’s started with those allegations, she’ll also backtrack on them, alternating between being angry that her family won’t support her in her abusive situation, and then being angry that he isn’t around more to help and telling them that she needs him home more. It’s also worth mentioning that her definition of abuse has stretched to saying that her friend abused her by giving someone else a job that they were supposed to give her. Additionally, she was previously diagnosed as a teen for being schizophrenic. I don’t know much about schizophrenia, but she definitely has something going on mentally, though to me it’s more what I imagine BPD or bi-polar to look like. She seemingly floats between multiple different versions of reality, and fully convinces herself that whichever version she’s in right now is the only one there is and ever has been. She’s open to therapy which her family has encouraged and said they’d pay for, but she won’t do the work of actually finding a therapist.
So, now she’s in a custody battle with the father which she’s predictably not handling well. He wanted to move into another apartment in their complex and she refused, saying he’ll be too close. Then she’s refusing to give him the two items from their apartment that he wanted to keep for himself. She’s always been very vindictive once she decides that someone has wronged her. When asked to actually draw up a custody agreement that she’ll agree to she won’t, presumably because she prefers shifting goalposts and not having something that people can hold her to.
It’s new drama every day. She’s constantly berating her parents and sisters for not doing enough for them and “siding with her abuser” when they try and do anything productive with the joint custody discussions. Honestly if it wasn’t for her child, I don’t think they’d put up with it, but everyone is concerned for the kid. He’s so sweet and they don’t want him cut out of their lives. They try to walk a fine line of influencing what they can while stopping short of telling her the whole truth, that she’s the one that’s being unreasonable most of the time. Honestly they’re probably some of the few stable presences in the kid’s life, so they want to make sure they stay in it.
My wife has asked what I think, but I don’t have a great answer. I know generally it’s best to not cater to the demands of someone so toxic and unwell, and by not fully calling her on her shit, they’re enabling her to some degree. On the other hand, they’re right that if they did call her on her shit, she would burn them and likely cut them out of the child’s life. Even if the court battle gets nasty, I don’t see her getting less than 50% custody of the kid. She’s been his primary caregiver and while it’s probably not a great environment mentally for him, it’s not anything that the courts would separate a family over. In general, she’s not a bad mom and doesn’t mistreat the kid from what I’ve seen, though she will weaponize him against the father.
All this is taking a mental toll on my wife, but she’s decided to do what she can to ensure the best outcome for her nephew given the circumstances. So she does what she can to try and influence from the sidelines while also walking on egg-shells trying not to piss off her sister too much. It would be much better for her mentally if she stopped interacting and participating in her sister’s drama, but again, there’s the kid to worry about. She’s tried just engaging less and her sister takes it the same as if she’d disagree with her. Anyone have any advice with how to approach this? What can I do to support her?
tldr; wife's sister is unstable and treats her family poorly but they're forced to cater to her to stay involved her her child's life. What do?

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• Spawn system is unbearable after extended play time. Half of the game is just deathmatch fighting at spawn in which kind of defeats the purpose of an open world style game. Please add many other spawn points with a wider range on the sides of maps or make a dynamic spawn system that detects other player proximity and moves your spawn based on range so there is at least a buffer of room to get away. I know this is hard to do on farm based on the map size but currently this spawn system is going to turn off a lot of players since the game is built around hardcore loss of gear.
• Initial recoil bounce of guns should be removed/reworked. This was already hated in tarkov for years and makes semi auto guns really unviable compared to full auto. Please change this to be a more consistent curve of recoil instead of just a barrel bounce. Think Valorant (EDIT) but more realistic based on attachments, etc.
• Jumping and shooting with full accuracy (super manning corners) needs to be nerfed. This is especially bad with scavs who have zero reason to lose anything and can still melt your legs/face with stock guns. I do enjoy the more arcadey movement but please don't make this into a call of duty 360 noscope type of game. If your feet are off of the ground your gun recoil should be double in my opinion. Easy fix.
• Full auto spread needs increased (lazer hipfire is bad FPS design). Currently full auto guns are way too strong in terms of being able to just hipfire horizontally and not really aim the gun. I do not want the goofy solutions that tarkov did like durability and jamming to make full auto not so dominant. Just make the recoil realistic in terms of the first few shots are accurate where aiming and then if you continue full auto the cone spreads. This is a known design that works in just about every single FPS game. Keep the realistic ballistics of course but also make the recoil patterns realistic as well. If you want an FPS shooter that is skill based than the player should be controlling the recoil not some arbitrary system. The current design just promotes cheesing as players will shoot the first 2-3 shots prefire into the corner of a wall knowing by the time they strafe out the recoil is "fixed" and they laser. It is just bad design overall for a game that wants tactical realism.
• Scav detection radius is absurd. I am not sure if it changes based on your player level but after hitting level 30 scavs see me from EVERYWHERE. I am talking like a 150m radius if I am anywhere near them I am spotted. They very often comm and rush at me from behind cover or non line of sight where they really should have no idea of my exact location other than general footsteps. Sniper scavs on valley are just as bad and I have been hit through trees at like 300m out just randomly moving through cover. Either please reduce the detection radius or make thier shots a bit less accurate. Sniper scav will basically kill you by shot 3 if you do not have hard cover or some serious armor. I have even multiple times (im taking like every other raid) will see a scav in the distance just straight rushing at my location when I have not fired a shot or given any target inidcator and I will just watch them path right up to me like a magnet. Its both immersion breaking and annoying as hell.
• Scav tanking expensive ammo. This one drives me insane. If you want to make scavs be stronger by increasing health pools than please make some kind of visual change to thier clothing to look armored, especially the face. They dont actually have to have lootable gear obviously to keep the loot balance but there is nothing more immersion breaking or frustrating than shooting a scav with a baseball cap in the face and they just flinch and run off. This is one of the worst design aspects of tarkov and how BSG uses hp pools to balance the boss/AI and it kills me to see it copied in ABI. Please ask the art team to do some kind of pass even making the scavs have ghetto looking armor like something out of the game Rust to keep with the lore feel.
• Higher tier 6-7 7.62x54R does same TTK hits as lvl 5 making the cost pointless in many hours of sniping with a mosin. So basically T5 ammo costs roughly $1k. It on average will two shot body a naked and three shot a geared player with L4+ armor. Headshots are one hit kill. T6 and T7 mosin ammo again from my extensive tesing does the exact same damage counts in terms of hits. So you are paying an extra $1k per round to get the same bullet DPS. Of course yes these rounds will shine vs level6+ armor players but I do not think any ammo worth $1k+ per round should take more than two body shots for L4 armor players. There are a few exceptions to this but I have used mosin on Valley for multiple 10+ hour sessions and something is weird with the 7.62x54R T6 and T7 ammo class.
• Shoulder swap for weapons to left peek. This is an easy addition and honestly should be in any tactical FPS game that requires CQB fighting. Please add this for a huge quality of life.
• Option in player list that can be enabled so whatever team mate gets the killing blow can only loot that body who they killed locking out the rest of the team. This would greatly help with players not wanting to join random squads and get thier stuff taken after putting in the hard work of securing the kill. Not a perfect solution but would greatly help stopping thieves. Yes would players try to "last hit" to steal your loot? Sure. Would this system work 10x better than currently just watching a teammate rat your gear? Absolutely. Again make this a selecable option in the lobby so party leaders can choose and everyone wins. You don't want that option just don't enable it.
• Allow ANY keyboard key to be rebound. Many of us use custom key binds that are shared across multiple game titles and having to "relearn" the keys for this game because certain keys like ALT can not be bound to crouch for example makes the player controller feel really bad. A normal person is not going to just unlearn 15+ years of gaming keyboard binds and so every time there is a panicked firefight I naturally revert to the expected keys and it gets me killed. Super annoying and again very basic fix to allow those keys to be rebound.

My main concern right now is that these types of changes I have listed have taken tarkov YEARS to update. So what I do not want to happen is players having to camp the ABI patch notes for another 2-3 years just to get back those quality of life changes missing in this game that tarkov now has resolved. I do expect ABI to be much more efficient with the patch releases but none the less for someone who has played tarkov for many years some of these changes feel like "starting over with an old version" waiting for the same fixes that already exist in tarkov. They copied a lot of the bad design aspects of tarkov along with the good in my opinion.
At the end of the day this game is fantastic and really blends the casual and tactical mix to hit a wide audience. If you do not currently have beta access please do understand watching the game really does not do it justice. You have to play it to feel all of the small quality of life changes that make this title rival tarkov. I personally could care less if the game is copied or not. They did it better and BSG had 6 years to get thier act together. Someone like myself has been praying for this exact mix of extraction for a long time now. As long as the monetization does not impede the hardcore looting aspect AKA buying gear than I think this game will be just fine for the long run. Good luck out there!

A little backstory: I got my cat when he was 6 months old. 2 days after getting him, we moved states together. 6 months later, covid hit and we moved in with my parents and their 2 crazy dogs. about a year and a half later, we moved to NYC with a roommate and her cat. My cat got along well with roommates cat I think he liked having a friend — then 2 years later, roommate and cat move out. Since then, my cat has gotten a bit, weird for lack of better words
He cannot be left with a cat sitter. If someone comes to take care of him or drops in, he loses his mind. Like literally chases people out of the hallway, corners and stalks, draws blood, bites, screams and yowls. I’d never personally witnessed this behavior until about 3 months ago, where he dominated my home because if I tried to move room to room he would come for me the same way. It was scary and he was so unfamiliar to me, nothing snapped him out of this rage.
Flash forward, he is now on Prozac. It helps a little but not enough where I am comfortable asking someone to come in and care for him if I have to leave town. He can still get weird when friends come over, I feel really bad for the little guy as he’s clearly very territorial over his space. It is ever changing, how could he not be! In his short life he’s moved all around, lived with dogs, and then bonded with a cat who then moved out.
So my ultimate question that I’ve been pondering for about a year now is…do I get another cat. I work outside of the house and I feel like my cat really is lonely. But given the territorialism I fear he would HATE having another cat. But then I remember how he bonded with my old roommates cat…I also wonder if this would allow a cat sitter to come in if he wasn’t there alone. At this point I literally can’t travel because he needs someone to administer his medicine but he would chase out a cat sitter at this point… that’s not sustainable…Just looking for some opinions for my situation from my fellow cat parents…Thx in advance!

First Previous
Dr. Dask caught herself lost in thought for what was not the first time that day. The humans were definitely up to something. She paced around her room on the outer-rim of the Lunar facility - built after the previous orbital station was deemed irredeemably outdated by modern standards.
If she’d learned anything in her 20 Earth years studying the people on the blue planet, it’s that they didn’t seem to go without a major war for very long. There were, of course, smaller conflicts and skirmishes all across the planet, as had become routine, but this extended ‘peace’, which had lasted her whole career by this point, must have meant something was off.
Some of her xenosociologist peers theorized that the humans must have, at last, realized how pointless their model of constant bloodbath is, and adopted the ‘civilized’ model of war, as indicated by the increase in their industrial capacities as well as the strengthening of their militaries despite the times of peace. Surely, her fellow scientists argued, this meant that the weapons are starting to be used as a tool of intimidation, rather than destruction and death.
The scientist thought the idea of a “civilized model of war” stupid and inherently contradictory, alas, those assertions were not the main issue she had with their theory. If humans did have a sudden realisation about the horrors they were committing on a daily basis, why were there still so many conflicts all around the world?
Not only that, but the weapons they were testing didn’t seem to be for the sole purpose of shock and awe. Of particular note was when she caught a glimpse of an artillery gun, a weapon designed to launch high-speed projectiles upwards and relying on the planet’s high gravity to bring them down into enemy lines, launching what seemed to be a regular projectile, until it fell on the ground and, rather than exploding, released a large amount of yellow-brownish gas, which surely couldn’t scare the most cowardly of Bannids, let alone a human. She did not know what the purpose of it was, but it definitely unsettled her.
Regardless, almost all of their developments seemed to be about killing each other, but better, and even the most impractical of technologies, namely “zeppelins”, as the humans called the hulking, and very flammable, masses floating above their cities, were being weaponized in one way or the other, for a purpose still shrouded in Dr. Dask’s eyes.
“Ms. Dask?” asked a meek voice, entering her room as she was still pacing around, deep in thought, “The scientists currently stationed at the observatory seem to think large amounts of troops are mobilizing, ma’am, you may want to see this.”
That pulled the scientist right out of her mental state, and heading to the observatory as fast as she could walk before it would be considered a full-blown run. “Thank you, Reylek” she said, directed at the Junior Scientist that was struggling to keep up behind her “This may be the answer I’ve been seeking for so long, we may find what they’ve been doing for all these years” she said, finally finding herself in the confines of the observatory room.
The researcher tried to keep her excitement in check. Whatever was happening, she thought, would definitely involve the deaths of thousands of sapients, as was so terribly common when human militaries got involved with something. She watched, in unabashed curiosity, as armies made of tens of thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands, of humans marched across the land, wielding the deadliest and most advanced weapons they had so far been able to grasp.
This was, by far, the largest armies she had ever seen. There were records of larger ones being deployed, sure, but being able to personally witness the sheer scale of such a war was truly astounding. They were still only in the mobilization phase, however, and as such the Dr. furiously took some notes and headed to the cafeteria for dinner, which had an extravagant window giving a beautiful view of Earth. The decommissioned space station also had one, and, when the new Lunar base was inaugurated, the older scientists felt quite salty about losing their favourite lookout spot and demanded that a new one be built.
By the end of the month (human calendar), however, her cautioned curiosity had already been turned into sheer terror. Fighting had broken out all across the world, the brutality of the newly developed weapons unmatched by anything she or any of her older colleagues had ever witnessed. Some of the proponents of the human enlightenment theory had locked themselves in their rooms, not being able to bear the sorrow of knowing that they could not have been any more wrong if they tried.
This continued on for untold days and weeks, casualties piling up on every side of the conflict, both soldier and civilian, in enough numbers to collapse any reasonable alien society. The humans, however, fought on, seemingly unphased.
After a few months, as the fighting still raged on from the thickest of jungles to the hottest of deserts, the main front, in the continent containing the nations who first started the war, seemed to come to a standstill. Dask, now significantly more disheveled than she was those sweet months ago before such a massively important event broke out, felt a glimmer of hope. Surely this stalemate would mean the beginning of negotiations, and a possible end to what could only be described as the worst conflict anyone in the outpost had ever witnessed.
The scientist and her colleagues were watching as both sides dug long, sinuous corridors across a field. This, she thought, would force them into peace. No army, not even a human one, would want to get stuck in such an unwinnable situation, where neither side can reliably attack each other without catastrophic losses on both sides.
The group gawked. Some of the humans along the battlefield had suddenly stopped fighting, even climbing into disputed territory, seemingly mingling with those who were their enemies just a few hours prior. This was, as Dask noted, shocked, probably the most human behaviour she’d ever seen. From a senseless bloodbath to camaraderie and care almost instantly. It further fueled her hopes of a peaceful resolution in the end, as clearly such a display of friendship together with the hopelessness of their military positions would be enough to make both sides come to their senses.
Later reports would note that this truce may have had something to do with the end of the Solar year, an occasion celebrated by nearly all humans for as far as Commonwealth records go. The armistice, though, did not last long. By the next day it may as well have never happened, much to the chagrin of the researchers, still hanging onto the slim hope that this would end soon, if not by collaboration then by hopelessness alone.
That, however, was not the case. It had been roughly 5 (human calendar) months since the seemingly random act of peace. Hundreds of thousands more had died, and at this point Dask believed the humans couldn’t actually grasp the scale of what they were doing, especially given how mysterious the actual reasons for the war still were to her. What unfathomable offense had been made for it to spark such slaughter? She did not have the answers, all she knew is that the humans did not seem at all inclined to back down.
By this point, their weapons were only one of the many sources of death and sorrow in this war. Disease ran rampant, with no proper medical facilities on the frontlines, and a lack of supplies meant that several thousands simply starved to death, not a single bullet needing to be fired to cause their demise.
The mood on the research team was somber. The war had been dragging on, and Dr. Dask wondered just how many sleepless nights were yet to come, for she couldn’t truly rest while such terrible acts were taking place so close by. The silver lining, if you could call it that, is that she’d grown somewhat jaded to human warfare, and it did not make her as nauseated as it should, and as it did in the past. Until the shells hit.
As Dask watched, projectiles came down from the sky on a human trench, though, unlike the explosions she’d grown accustomed to, they simply released large amounts of a brownish-yellow gas, which she remembered seeing all those months ago, being tested. Once it dissipated enough to see through, she understood its true purpose, and immediately wished she hadn't. Hundreds of humans, twitching, coughing, vomiting, their skins burnt despite the absence of fire, some of them eerily still, choked out by the gas that had displaced the air on the long dirt corridors.
She stared, in shock, as the other side began charging, putting on masks that deprived them of all human features and walking into the dying lines, immune to the effects of the deadly gas. They mercilessly killed anyone and everyone wearing the wrong uniform, even those already on the floor. She thought about that in contrast to that serene night in which they mingled, it was hardly believable that they were of the same species, let alone the same people altogether.
Vomit filled the observatory. The other researchers, like Dr. Dask herself, thought they were used to human antics at this point, but their ingenuity when it comes to cruelty once again proved to be unrivaled. Most others left the room, leaving the dirty work to the cleaning bots. The Dr. did not vomit, if for no other reason than that she had not yet eaten, and as such physically could not do so. She also returned to her room, no longer feeling even the remotest scientific curiosity to watch such a terrible event unfold.
Over the next several years. The war dragged on and on, mountains upon mountains of bodies piling up,the count in the millions by now, civilians included. The clothes were stripped from the dead, washed anew and given to a young, excited recruit, just for them to meet the same fate, and repeat the cycle once more. Morale among the researchers was at an all time low, many choosing to no longer accompany the fighting as closely, and some retiring from the facility entirely.
The humans, of course, did not care much for the emotions of aliens they didn’t even know the existence of, and as such only got more and more creative with their machinations, from flying machines strapped with bombs and guns, to a brand new vehicle named the “tank”, which was, by all means, a marvel of engineering for their civilization, albeit prone to constant breakdowns. All that to fuel a war which Dr. Dask was still unsure as to the cause.
Dr. Dask herself, albeit far worse-for-wear than she had been before this, kept going. While the overwhelming cruelty was evident, she could not simply ignore the random glimmers offered by the various and random acts of kindness she had seen across the war. From the truce on that night, to a random soldier helping an injured enemy combatant, to humans risking their own life and walking into the line of fire to rescue their comrades.
That’s why, when the day of the Armistice finally came, she was one of the few left from the original team still there to witness it, and, as soldiers disbanded and went home, she could only look across the cafeteria window and into the blue marble above, wondering if this troubled species could ever truly achieve peace and step into the galactic stage as new allies, rather than pariahs.

Author's Note: The masses have once again spoken. I hope you don't mind a slightly more well informed perspective this time, as I can only come up with so many excuses to force an unwitting alien to witness the horrors of war. Definitely a more somber chapter too, which I find rather appropriate for WWI. Once again this turned far larger than I originally intended and I do apologise to those who wanted a detailed, more entertaining reaction to tanks and such, though I felt like it simply would not fit properly into this particular narrative. Finally, feedback and corrections for random inaccuracies are welcome as always. Enjoy!