S esl introduction games first day

So I’m new to the game. I started with classic cata and have a level 40 Hunter. But I feel like Im not enjoying the level experience. It feels like every time I sit down to play Im just doing chores and the dessert I get when I’m done will be raiding. This is not the gameplay loop Im interested in.
I want to get invested in my character, get lost in the RP part of the game. Quest slowly where each level feels earned. I know that many of you wouldn’t recommend hardcore as someone’s first experience in WoW but I honestly can’t see any other way to enjoy the game. Hardcore sounds so intense and interesting, where every dungeon run is dangerous, where you second guess running into that cave and maybe recruit some help from other players to tackle the challenge.
Maybe hardcore is nothing like this and I’ll have a bad time. But I’m VERY much looking forward to trying it.

Hey, I’m just here learning over the last week or 2. I’ve been referred to a psychiatrist by my GP so just waiting for that and trying to figure this all out 🤷‍♀️
I’m a 45 year old female (I know, it’s late!!) I’ve had depressive episodes throughout my life, along with substance abuse and eating disorders in my younger years. I also have an autism/adhd diagnosis that I went to a private psychologist for (I believe I have adhd but not sure about the autism dx now). I stopped drinking last July after a spell of wine in the evenings and expected to feel amazing with this new sobriety…anyway, a bad depressive episode hit me shortly after, and my doctor prescribed duloxetine (cymbalta). Within a few days I felt AMAZING, it was quite the surprise after wanting to die days earlier. Anyway, didn’t think much of it..I also started taking kratom every day shortly after, and this continued for a few months. It’s not legal where I live so I had to order it from Europe, and whenever I travelled (twice I think) I went without it ok. Until April. I went to visit my family and had what I think was a hypo, I was hectic, wired, not sleeping much,impulsive , blurting stuff out, constantly shopping and had family ask me if my adhd meds weren’t working anymore🥺 I put this down to mild kratom withdrawal at the time, came home, finished what I had left and never touched it again. Shortly after, I had another week where i suddenly felt brilliant, high sex drive (to the point where my husband couldn’t keep up and I had to self-relieve several times a day-sorry tmi), was really organised, focused, social (which is very out of character), then obviously I crashed, but it wasn’t like a depression if ever experienced before..I had panic attacks for the first time, physical anxiety where I felt rushes of adrenaline course through my body with waves of dread…honestly it was unbearable! And then I went high again. For about 5 days. I had my entire future planned out! Made loads of plans, called lots of people, had loads of energy and couldn’t sleep much but woke up feeling happy?? Like the serotonin was literally coursing round my body in a way I could feel..at this point I was thinking my depression has gone, this is great. Crashed pretty hard that weekend and honestly I’m just sort of low and irritable since but not in any particular state. I made some bad and impulsive choices during these spells that has left me with alot of shame. I’m also wondering if I’m borderline since I’ve always had “emotional problems” and that just leaves me terrified that there’s no real cure… My grandfather was bipolar and my sister had a long spell in a psych ward a few years ago so it’s kinda in the family, but still…I think whatever it is is all my fault.
Thankyou for reading! Appreciate any insights or experience or if anyone relates to this please comment, I’d be grateful 😊

Producer: So, you have a video game for me?
Writer: Yes, sir, I do! It's a battle royale game called Fortnite.
Producer: Fork Knife? Is it a food-making game where you eat with a Fork and a Knife?
Writer: Well, No actually, sir, this is a shooter game where players are dropped onto an island where they must scavenge for weapons and resources inside people's homes while trying to be the last person standing.
Producer: Sounds a lot like that game PUBG.
Writer: Well, yes, it's Very similar to that.
Producer: So, Isn't that kind of a rip-off? Whats the point of making this game if its gonna be a Complete rip-off?
Writer: What if we give the player the ability to build stuff in the game?
Producer: Thats different enough. So how do we do the building in this Fork-knife game of yours?
Writer: Well, we add a building mechanic where players can gather materials and construct forts and other structures to defend themselves.
Producer: So, they can build in the middle of a fight?
Writer: They sure can!
Producer: Won't that make the combat complicated and kind of confusing?
Writer: Oh, definitely. Super confusing. And we're going to have this cartoony art style, so it's all bright and colorful.
Producer: Cartoony art style?
Writer: Yes, sir, we want to attract a younger audience, you know, kids and teenagers.
Producer: Really? And what about older players?
Writer: They'll probably play it too. Some might even play it so much while filming themselves sitting, eating, and drinking inside a room infront of a bunch of cameras to a bunch of digital people on some kind of streaming-platform out there. And some older players might even be so good that they can be placed inside a room with other players that are as good as them.
Producer: Okay, okay, But wait. Why would older players be interested in a game designed for kids?
Writer: Because it's free.
Producer: Oh, older people love free things.
Writer: And we’ll have these things called Emotes where players can dance and do fun gestures for no reason.
Producer: Why would they need that?
Writer: To taunt other players and express themselves, and making it easier for other players to get kills!
Producer: And we're sure kids will love this?
Writer: Oh, absolutely. They'll be flossing in no time.
Producer: What’s flossing?
Writer: It’s one of the dances that we’ll include in the game.
Producer: Ah, okay, and how will we make money?
Writer: Super easy, barely an inconvenience.
Producer: How come?
Writer: Microtransactions.
Producer: Microtransactions?
Writer*: Yeah, Microtransactions. Players can buy this thing called V-Bucks, which is our in-game currency, to get skins, emotes, and other cosmetic items.
Producer: So, none of these items give players a competitive advantage?
Writer: Nope, just cosmetics.
Producer: And people will spend real money on that?
Writer: Oh, they definitely will.
Producer: How are you so sure?
Writer: Because we’ll make it really cool and hard to resist. Plus, we'll create this thing called FOMO.
Producer: FOMO?
Writer: Fear of Missing Out. We’ll have limited-time items so players feel pressured to buy them before they're gone.
Producer: So, we’re going to exploit psychological weaknesses?
Writer: Oh, for sure.
Producer: Exploiting psychological weaknesses is tight! So, how will players get to the Island?
Writer: They’ll skydive from a flying bus.
Producer: A flying bus?
Writer: Yeah, we’ll call it the Battle Bus.
Producer: Why would a bus be flying?
Writer: Because it's fun.
Producer: But How does it fly tho?
Writer: Listen, sir, i'm gonna need you to get all the way off my back about why the Battle Bus can fly using a very big sketchy pop-able baloon but only moves one direction, okay.
Producer: Okay, let me get off of that thing.
Writer: Oh, and every few minutes, a storm will shrink the play area, forcing players into a smaller and smaller circle until one player remains.
Producer: Why would a storm do that?
Writer: To make the game faster and more intense.
Producer: But thats not--- never mind.
Writer: And we’ll have different game modes, including solo, duo, and squads, so players can team up with friends.
Producer: What if players don’t have friends?
Writer: Then they’ll be loners. Solo mode is perfect for that.
Producer: And how will we keep the game fresh?
Writer: We'll have seasonal updates with new themes, items, and challenges.
Producer: Seasonal updates?
Writer: Plus, we’ll add crossover events with popular franchises from all our child hoods we can think off.
Producer: Like what?
Writer: Well, i'm just gonna throw some names out there, just top of my head, *Marvel, Star Wars, DC, Avatar, Family Guy, TMNT, POTC, Rick and Morty, and a Whole bunch of other stuff.
Producer: So, we’re going to have superheroes and nerds fighting each other in a game where you can build forts and dance?
Writer: Exactly.
Producer: That sounds amazing!
Writer: Oh, it’s going to be super amazing.
Producer: And that's Fortnite. So, what do you think?
Writer: I think we’ll make billions.
Producer: We're gonna be rich!
Producer: Wow, wow, wow. Wow.
Producer: But wait, you forgot to say what’s the story behind this game?
Writer: Oh, right, well, the island is constantly changing and evolving. At first, there isn't much backstory, only younger and older players ACTIVELY hunting each other down and killing each other, but over time, we introduce a series of events and lore that shape the game's world.
Producer: Interesting. What kind of events and lore are we talking about?
Writer: Well, Each season, we add new story elements to the game. For example, there's this mysterious organization called "The Imagined Order" that's manipulating the island. Players uncover clues and secrets about them as the game progresses.
Producer: So, there are hidden stories and mysteries?
Writer: Exactly. One season, we had a massive meteor strike that changed the landscape. Another season, a giant iceberg crashed into the island, bringing new areas to explore. We also introduced a volcanic eruption that altered the terrain significantly.
Producer: Sounds like a lot of natural disasters.
Writer: Ye ye ye. But all these events tie into the overarching narrative. There's this powerful artifact called the Zero Point at the center of the island, and it's the source of all these changes.
Producer: What’s the Zero Point?
Writer: It's a mysterious energy source that can manipulate time and space. Different factions and characters try to control it, leading to conflicts and alliances.
Producer: Who are these characters?
Writer: We've introduced various characters over time, like Jonesy, who starts as a standard avatar but becomes central to the story. He’s sort of the player’s guide and gets involved in all the major events.
Producer: And these characters, they have backstories?
Writer: Yes, each character has their own backstory and motives. Some are heroes trying to save the island, others are villains seeking power. We add new characters regularly to keep things fresh and engaging.
Producer: How do players learn about all this?
Writer: Through in-game events, cutscenes, and quests. For instance, we might have a live event where something dramatic happens, like a giant robot fighting a monster. These events often change the map and advance the storyline.
Producer: Live events? How do those work?
Writer: At specific times, we host live events where players can participate or just watch something big unfold. These events are usually massive, with millions of players logging in to witness them.
Producer: That sounds like a logistical nightmare.
Writer: It can be, but it creates a shared experience that players love. It's a huge part of what keeps the community engaged.
Producer: So, the story is dynamic and ever-changing?
Writer: Exactly. We keep evolving the narrative with each season, adding new mysteries and plot twists. It's like an ongoing TV show where the players are part of the story.
Producer: And this keeps players coming back?
Writer: Absolutely. The evolving story and frequent updates make sure there's always something new to discover and experience.
Producer: Sounds like you’ve thought of everything.
Writer: We’ve tried to make it as immersive and engaging as possible. The story is just one part of what makes Fortnite a unique and exciting game.
Producer: Well, I’m sold. Let’s make this game!

Netflix near deal to air NFL Christmas Day games, Bloomberg says 

Netflix is finalizing a deal to acquire exclusive rights to stream two National Football League games on Christmas Day, people with knowledge of the matter told Bloomberg's Lucas Shaw. An agreement would mark the first time Netflix has licensed the rights to one of the world's premiere sports competitions and the first time it would show live sports, the report noted.

I had surgery just under 2 weeks ago, my friend Jen knows exactly what surgery I had, the complications I had on top of it in great detail and she visited me a few days after as well and saw how much I was struggling physically and mentally. I’ve also kept her up to date on how things are going with me after that in our friend group.
A simple Google immediately says my initial recovery time is 6-8 weeks without complications, 3 months for a really full recovery. Jen is a doctor so she doesn’t even need to Google but if she’s unsure I’m sure can refresh herself on it before she decides how to approach me confidently on the situation.
Last week, just 1 week after my surgery, she asked if I can come out for coffee with her. I was extremely shocked she was doing this but also very disappointed in her. I was hoping she wouldn’t do this because of her history.
Jen is a doctor and as long as she first started training to be one until now being an experienced doctor has used it as a way to diminish any health issues her friends have, with a rolling eyes attitude to anything you say you have or think you have, treating you like a hysterical medical time waster and like everything you think you have is you exaggerating or wanting to be ill. She’s never wanted us to go to her for medical advice and we’ve always respected that, but as friends talking about being ill in general occasionally and medical things come up in personal conversations (I had to go to A&E last night etc), she herself talks about her own.
Once I mentioned I’d had a migraine at the weekend and she immediately interrupted me with disdain patronisingly saying a headache isn’t a migraine. I said I had to go A&E as I could barely walk or see. She shut up straight away but you’d think she’d stop doing things like that after getting responses like that everytime but she never does. Only when you’re in an undeniable active serious medical scenario she gives you grace and support. But when she has a simple cold she makes a huge deal about how she can’t come out, which is completely understandable but very different to her attitude to others being unwell.
She even tried to diminish the suspected illness I currently had before I was given a surgery date that I could use to prove to her it’s being taken seriously by MY doctor. During the surgery time and immediate days after in hospital she acted supportive answering questions, because there was no way she can diminish that, but then went back to acting like it’s nothing and brushing me off when I had a scary complication at home and tried to ask her if it needs following up tonight or not. It did need following up and needed antibiotics, if I’d gone by her reaction I’d have left it.
Jen never asked me again how I am, asked me to go for coffee 1 week post surgery, when I said I’m not anywhere near leaving the house stage she said nothing. She never asked how I am again since either and now less than 2 weeks post surgery she’s asking me to go out shopping and for lunch with her like my surgery never happened.
This time I’m really angry. I’ve always been the kind of person to not make others feel awkward or embarrassed and laughing off situations like this, especially with Jen’s attitude and comments towards me and others, I always underplay it for her instead of making her feel bad. I don’t want to escalate the situation or spend a lot of energy on it especially in my physical and mental state of recovery but I do want to reply to her briefly and succinctly putting her in her place for once. How shall I reply to her?
TL:DR - My doctor friend keeps asking me to come out and ignoring I’ve had surgery

Someone always wins the fight guys, it's an output of effort, skill and communication to win a fight in this game.
You win fights sometimes. I almost guarantee you're not a 'sweat'.
Common excuses I hear every day:

• "Their holding hands!" = They're playing together
• "He's holding an f*ing head glitch" = He's playing cover
• "They're just ratting in the building" = They're holding a good position for endgame
• "They just waited for the 3rd party" = They're timing the push to get advantage
• "They're just camping on height" = They're holding high ground, like they're supposed to
• "They're just sat at the edge of zone waiting for us" = They're gatekeeping for easy kills because you're out of position

Admit it – you've complained and said every single one.
Now admit another – you've done every single one of these.
Every Apex tutorial you've ever seen talks about how to use these strategies to your advantage, and when someone uses them on you, your first instinct is to bitch and normally everyone takes turns bitching. God it gets so old.
When it should be a chance to learn and adapt. Not only how you can avoid it happening to you again, but how you can use it your advantage next time. You can always learn something after every fight. Even if it feels like you did everything right, if you look far back enough there's almost always a mistake.
Try this:

• "We're getting picked off 1 by 1, let's plan a specific route beforehand and push together"
• "We got held out, we should've rotated sooner to avoid being gatekept. Let's play someone with ringscans"
• "We're taking too long to push knocks, we need better vertical positioning, I'll hop on horizon/path/octane" "Everyone's running snipers, can you hop off Ash and play bangalore so we can smoke-push?"
• "We keep getting Alter pushed in buildings, let's anchor with caustic once we get to endgame"

Stop saying everyone's sweaty or complaining when you die, let's normalise non-toxic post-match discussion.

Hello there,
I was wondering if I was the only one experiencing this situation and would like to know if anybody was able to rewire their brain
I’m born in 1996, meaning the tv has always been part of my life and my parents had enough means so that I had one in my room at an early age. A lot of my childhood was spent watching TV, playing video games and being in front of screens. Sadly, I wasn’t the kind of gamer that was stimulating their brain with gaming, I was doing it to avoid reality and was sometimes able to do it 10-12hrs a day. I feel like most of it was me staring aimlessly at a screen just to shut my brain off. These behaviours continued through my teenage years and my early adult years. I’ve worked hard on myself in the last year to break the pattern. I’m very proud of that but at the same time I feel like the damages are done. I’ve always been mentally a bit slower than the average. Not necessarily dumb but but being ADHD/slow made me look dumb. Also I feel immature for my age, like i didn’t properly lived the years when I was supposed to grow and mature. Now I’m often overwhelmed and anxious whenever I need to get out of my routine or my confort zone. Also, the way that my brain is wired is so anti-productive, when I receive new information and/or am questioned on it I start thinking about how I will be perceived if I say stupid shit instead of thinking about the answer.
I’m at a stage of my life where I want to step up, i want to absorb a lot of information and remember it. I want to feel in control and not at the mercy of a complicated question. I feel like i did a lot of progress but I would love to hear the testimonials of people that got out of this state and reached their full potential and quite frankly, to know if it’s possible.
Thank you to any of you that read everything.

Yelena watched the doorway through which the young Ashfield scion had just left for a few moments more as she pondered over the meeting they’d just had.
*Precocious indeed,* she thought with a smile.
A smile that only grew as her gaze flitted over to her childhood friend’s… complicated expression.
It seemed young William’s decision had come as much a surprise to his instructor as it had come to Yelena herself.
“He said no,” Joana said after a few moments.
Yelena nodded slowly as she reclined into her friend’s surprisingly comfortable chair. Given what she knew of Griffith, the Queen had half expected the thing to be harder than mithril when she first sat down - but it was surprisingly plush.
“Not without good reason,” Yelena said as she shifted about.
“Good reason?” Joana scoffed. “You offered him your daughter’s hand.” Her eyes narrowed slightly. “You offered *all* of your daughter’s hands.”
Yelena rolled her eyes at her friend’s tone. “And if he’d accepted I would have considered it a bargain.”
A minor scandal and the loss of a number of future marriage alliances was ultimately nothing compared to the ability to raid Kraken nests. And that was ignoring that a hypothetical means to slay kraken in deep water would undoubtedly have other applications.
Applications that would be incredibly useful in the months to come.
Though, perhaps, if young William’s plans came to fruition that coming storm could be delayed by a few years.
“…Are things truly that desperate?” Joana asked quietly.
“They’re not great,” Yelena admitted, massaging the bridge of her nose. “The Blackstones… I knew they’d resist the reforms, but to threaten open rebellion?”
She’d not expected that. Not even in her wildest dreams. Lindholm’s only human ducal house had ever been wilful, and their antipathy towards the Orcs who dwelled in the Sunlands was well documented, but surely even they could see why Yelena was doing what she was.
Regardless of what her critics said, her decision to end the slave trade in Lindholm was most assuredly not the result of ‘useless sentiment’.
Far from it.
Oh certainly, Yelena had no love for the institution of slavery, for reasons both moral and financial, but that wasn’t why she’d created the abolitionist movement.
With each passing year, the Homeland’s view of Lindholm grew ever more covetous. More and more the Sun Empress and Desert Khan’s rhetoric centred less on their ongoing deadlock with each other and more on the idea of ‘recovering wayward territories’.
Certainly, that could have been a reference to Old Growth as much as Lindholm, but Yelena doubted it.
Lindholm might have scared the Solites and Lunites into retreating by choosing to engage them over deep water, but ultimately those victories were borne of a lack of conviction on the part of her foes.
Had the two disparate fleets been willing to risk the permanent loss of a small portion of their mithril cores in order to achieve victory and push towards the mainland, they may well have been able to flip the allegiances of a number of Lindholmian houses.
Oh, certainly, the high elves and dark elves of Lindholm might have prided themselves on maintaining the strictures of equality that defined the Old Empire – but with either Solite or Lunite airships hovering over their family castles, she couldn’t help but wonder if some might reconsider their stances on their fellow elves.
No, while an invasion of Lindholm would certainly be costly, it was entirely within the realm of reason.
An invasion of the Old Growth however?
There was a reason the Wood Elves – as they named themselves – had managed to remain independent of both the other two, much larger, nations despite sharing land borders with both of them.
Their strange magics might have been muted and weak beyond the borders of their home, but within their territory they were nigh invincible.
No, if there was to be any ‘reclamation’ of any territory belonging to the old Aelven Imperium, it was likely to come from Lindholm.
To that end, the kingdom could ill afford to keep feeding people and iron into the meatgrinder that was the Sunlands. Could ill afford to keep orcs that might otherwise be valuable mages laboring in the fields under the eyes of watchful taskmasters.
Lindholm needed every mage-knight it could get – regardless of the color of their skin or the shape of their ears.
Yet after year and years of negotiations and attempts to shift public opinion on the matter, the North still remained willfully ignorant of that truth.
“Surely they know that even if they win, any kind of division between us will just see the Homeland sweep over them?” Joana said.
Yelena shrugged. “I have a feeling that Duchess Blackstone’s victories over both the Lunites and Solites has left her confident of repeating the fact should it come to that.”
Foolhardy, in her eyes, but no one had ever accused the Blackstones of being meek. Nor being incapable of backing up their sometimes insane claims. What other House could lay claim to an ancestry that had once beaten back the Old Imperium at the height of its power?
Where other human nobles had been sworn into the Old Imperium on their knees with their battered armies scattered to the winds, the Blackstones managed to resist long and hard enough that the Imperial Legions had been forced to come to the negotiating table.
Ultimately, the Blackstones had still been absorbed into the Empire, but they’d done so on their terms with their heads unbowed.
…Though it was somewhat ironic that nearly a thousand years on, it was now those same humans in the position of the old Imperial Legion while it was the free orcs who now utilized the same strategies as the old Blackstone tribes – right down to the Wyvern riders.
“I could imagine that,” Joana muttered.
“Is it strange that I think she might pull it off?” Yelena said – though only because she was sure that no one beyond her friend and silent guards was listening.
“Part of me wants to argue that, but… do you think it’s a human thing?”
Yelena thought about the Blackstones and the young man who’d just turned down a chance to be king one day.
“Perhaps,” she admitted.
Personally she thought it was because humans didn’t live as long – and there was more of them. When your life could be measured in but a single century, perhaps you were a bit more inclined towards taking risks that might make an elf balk?
…Risks like trying to take your first year team up against a third year team in the name of trying to avoid a war.
Or at least delay it.
“I still can’t believe he said no to your offer,” Joana said, something… complicated in her friend’s expression.
Yelena grinned at the sight, though she wrestled down the urge to ask a number of probing questions of her normally straight laced friend, who seemed to have a childish crush on a young man nearly ten years her junior – and her student beside.
Normally she’d be all over a scandal that delicious.
Alas, right now was work time. “I can. He gave me his reasons and they were solid.”
Well, solid enough. If you squinted a bit. And tried to think ‘human’.
Rather than all-but guarantee a war by having the Crown break off his betrothal, he intended to do it himself.
Loudly and publicly.
And if he won – and that was a big *if* – he’d all but destroy any kind of excuse the Blackstones might have to declare war in response. Indeed, by being ‘shamed’ in such a public manner they’d need to spend a few years at least regathering lost support.
After all, who would want to follow a house into a civil war just after their heir was publicly humiliated by a team of cadets two years her junior?
Academy fights weren’t just schoolyard squabbles. They were civil conflicts writ small. A microcosm of the constant jostling and jockeying of Lindholm’s houses.
In other words, they held weight.
If Willaim could beat his fiancée, Yelena knew she’d owe him more than she could ever truly repay. A few more years of preparation would turn an almost guaranteed defeat into something *much* more even.
Especially if she could scoop up who knows how many mithril cores that were otherwise just littering the ocean. Ninety percent of them would be of limited use immediately, but a few years would give her time to construct at least a few more airship hulls to house the devices.
All that was required was for William to win.
“Solid,” Joana scoffed. “His plan is to go up against a group of third years with a team of firsties.”
Yelena tried to keep the intensity she was feeling out of her tone as she leaned forward. “You don’t think he can do it?”
Joana opened her mouth before hesitating. “I… normally I’d say no. Talented as they are, the gap in experience is just too wide.”
“But…”
The dark elf rolled her silver eyes behind her glasses. “But, with William’s newest invention…” The woman paused. “Son of a bitch.”
For just a moment Yelena was treated to the rare sight of her friend laughing. “I can’t believe I thought he ‘just wanted to use it in a schoolyard fight’,” the Instructor said.
“Well, he sort of is, in a way.” Yelena shrugged. “It just so happens to be a very important schoolyard fight.”
Joana laughed. “I suppose it is.”
“Still, do you think he can win?”
Joana straightened up. “I genuinely don’t know. With his new invention he might be able to catch her off guard. If he can skew the numbers in his favor at the start, they might have a chance.”
Yelena frowned. Not exactly the ringing endorsement she wanted to hear, but that was part of why she valued Joana’s friendship.
Always had really, even when the girl had first come to court at the age of ten as a potential playmate for Yelena’s daughters and told her that her dress made her look like some kind of tropical bird.
Something Yelena realized upon closer inspection was true.
Ever since, the Queen had made a point of checking in with the girl from time to time, if only for the occasional shot of unvarnished truth.
It was a strange ‘friendship’ from the outside looking in, but one that got less so as time went by and the age gap became less stark.
“Well, let’s hope the human capacity for the nigh impossible isn’t relegated entirely to the Blackstones,” Yelena muttered.
Because if it wasn’t, the boy would either have to marry one of Yelena’s daughters or die.
She *could* *not* afford the knowledge in his head to reach the Blackstones. To that end, he’d either accept her offer – rolling the dice on the onset of war and all that might come with it – or he’d suffer an accident.
As much as it pained the royal sovereign’s heart to see such a bright and enterprising soul be snuffed out before its time.
Being forced to make such decisions was simply the price of wearing the crown.
“Still,” Joana said, and Yelena was grateful for the distraction as she looked up. “Will you actually leave him alone if he pulls this off?”
Yelena scoffed.
“Of course not. If anything I’ll up my offer.” She shrugged. “I’ll give him you, myself and half my court if it means getting my hands on what’s in his head.”
It was actually a little amusing how Joana flushed at her words, even as she shook her head.
“Yes, that sounds a lot more like you.”
Yelena nodded. Damn right it did.
Though as she did, a thought occurred to her. “Hey Joana?”
“Yes?”
“In your reports to me, didn’t you mention the Ashfield boy having some kind of nickname.”
The dark elf pondered the words for a moment before stiffening. “Hmm, he does actually. A rather apt one considering. Apt enough that I’m wondering if whatever he used to kill Al’Hundra is related.”
“Well, don’t keep me in suspense. What is it?”
Joana leaned back, her head craned upwards, as if seeking strength from above.
“Kraken Slayer.”
Yelena laughed. She couldn’t help it.
“Of course it is.”


“You killed Al’Hundra.”
William was still reeling a little from the conversation he’d just had, so he was actually a little caught off guard by a finger being shoved into his face the moment he stepped back into his teams quarters.
*Ah,* he thought. *I promised answers.*
Though it seemed that in his absence his team had managed to figure out some of those answers without him.
Glancing past Olzenya’s outstretched arm, he saw Marline shaking her head – as if to vehemently deny she’d told them anything.
She needn’t have bothered, her geass precluded it as an option. Hell, even once everyone found out it would preclude it as an option.
Which was for the best for the moment because now he wasn’t so much trying to hide what he’d done as *how* he’d done it. Admittedly, Marline didn’t know anything beyond the broadest details, but she knew enough to know that it was some kind of enchantment combined with alchemy.
Now it was possible the forces working against him – or rather simply to profit off him – had already figured that out and he’d hear the alchemy lab exploded any moment now, but he’d sooner put it off for as long as he could.
To that end, he turned to Olzenya – though not before politely lowering her pointing arm.
Something that, to her credit, the high elf allowed – actually looking a little embarrassed by her outburst and thus rudeness.
“Honestly, I was expecting something like that to come from Bonnlyn, not you,” he said to the slightly flushed high elf.
As he glanced over toward where the dwarf was sitting, she shrugged. “I realize I may not be the most classically polite individual around, but I’ve been a merchant long enough to recognize when someone’s got a trade secret they want to keep close to their chests.”
If anything, Olzenya flushed harder, as while she might not have been familiar with trade secrets, she was most definitely familiar with the notion of house spells that needed to be kept secret.
“I also thought ambushing him at the door was a little rude,” Verity murmured from the back of the room.
Olzenya coughed, before backing up. “Of course, I apologize for that William.”
More bemused than anything else, especially as the elf curtsied, he waved a hand dismissively. “It’s fine. Or, understandable, I guess.”
“Good,” Ozlenya smiled, glad for his acceptance… before she shouted again. “Because you lied to us.”
“I did?”
“He didn’t,” Marline said. “He said he had something to bet against Tala.”
Indeed he had, something he’d kept hidden under a sheet. After all, he’d not wanted his big surprise to be spoiled by the rumors of his coming beating him to the cafeteria.
And they would.
Rumors in the academy somehow managed to move at light speed.
“He implied it was gold,” Olzenya shot back.
“And you said Tala wouldn’t go for it, but you came with us anyway,” Bonnlyn said.
Indeed, he had implied it was gold. Or ‘something valuable enough to catch her interest’.
“To comfort him after she shot him down,” Olzenya said. “Instead I damn near tripped over my own feet in front of everyone when he pulled an honest to goddess mithril core out of his ass.”
William was actually a little thrown off – and amused – by the sudden display of crassness from the noble girl.
“But he didn’t lie.” It was actually a little surprising – and heartwarming – to hear Verity speaking so forcefully.
And that Olzenya didn’t immediately snap at her for doing so. The team really had come a long way in just a few months.
*Ah, the joys of shared suffering,* William thought as he watched the girls bicker amongst themselves.
“As I’m sure you’ve all guessed, I have indeed been less than open about a few things,” he said, silencing all of them – except Marline who’d yet to speak in the first place. “With that said, I’ve never once lied to you about my end goal.”
“Breaking off your betrothal,” Marline said finally.
“Breaking off my betrothal *without* starting a war,” he said. “If it were that easy, the Queen would have done it for me just now.”
“You met the Queen?” Olzenya sounded a little faint.
“I did.”
Oh, how he did.
“Oh ancestors, please don’t tell me you hit on the queen!?” This time Marline sounded a little faint.
And he actually felt a little offended. “What!? Why would you think that.”
“You’re doing the same thing you do when we talk about Instructor Griffith,” Bonnlyn said with studiously neutral voice. “Or Instructor Morline. Or Instructor Flen. Or some of the guards.”
“Or that one cafeteria lady,” Verity chimed in, a little red in the face.
“Or the-”
“I do not!” He’d finally had enough of these aspersion on his character.
Across the room, a number of sighs rang out, even from the elves.
“At least now I knew why he never checked me out,” Bonnlyn said. “He’s got mommy issues. And I’m not old enough to tickle them.”
“Still, the Queen?” Olzenya hissed.
“I mean, have you seen her?” Marline muttered back. “I mean, I don’t agree with him… but I get it.”
“I didn’t ‘perv’ on the Queen.” Some part of him died on using such childish language. “We had a meeting about my plans and… what occurred with Al’Hundra. Needless to say, the fact that I’m here means she’s agreed to go ahead with them and I’m also to keep quiet about anything I may or may not have had to do with any Kraken going missing. Or their cores.”
He deliberately left out the royal marriage offer.
Still, with those words the room went silent. After all, if the Queen had told him to say nothing, he was expected to say nothing. Just because the North in general didn’t have much respect for royal authority didn’t mean the rest of the kingdom did.
Quite the opposite.
“Well, if the Queen has commanded you to *remain* silent, I suppose there’s nothing to be done,” Olzenya muttered. “Though I would like answers some day.”
“Hell, I’d like to know why you brought Marline in on your plans,” Bonnlyn said, glancing at the Dark Elf. “You know, and not the rest of us.”
There was no missing the hint of hurt there – which he understood.
“I can promise you it was purely a matter of convenient circumstance,” he said. “And I can promise you, I didn’t confide in Marline for free.”
All the girls glanced up as the dark elf nodded slowly. “He’s not lying – though I can’t say anymore. Literally. It’s a price I paid willingly, but one I doubt any of you would be interested in.”
Almost as one, he could see the lightbulbs turn on in everyone’s brain simultaneously – except for Verity, who took a few seconds.
*‘Geass,’* thought none of them said it.
This time though, when the girls looked between him and Marline, there was a definite sense of wariness to it.
“Well, I suppose there’s nothing else to say then,” Bonnyln said. “I guess we should…”
“…Go to bed,” Olzenya nodded warily.
William grinned. “Good idea. Big day tomorrow and all that.”
That was an understatement, and he could tell everyone was thinking it as they made their way over to their rooms.
Still, it was true all the same.
They’d need their rest if they wanted to stand a chance tomorrow.
Indeed, they’d need every advantage they could get.
To that end, William could only hope he’d stacked the deck in their favor enough to matter.
…It took him a long time to get to sleep.
When he did awake, in the early hours of the morning, it was to the sound of an explosion.
*In the direction of the old alchemy labs if I’m not wrong,* he thought with a grim smile.
It seemed someone had decided to investigate his storage room even sooner than he’d anticipated.
Annoying, but it hardly mattered at this point in time.
All that really mattered was going back to sleep.
He had a big day ahead of him, after all.
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Producer: So, you have a video game for me?
Writer: Yes, sir, I do! It's a battle royale game called Fortnite.
Producer: Fork Knife? Is it a food-making game where you eat with a Fork and a Knife?
Writer: Well, No actually, sir, this is a shooter game where players are dropped onto an island where they must scavenge for weapons and resources inside people's homes while trying to be the last person standing.
Producer: Sounds a lot like that game PUBG.
Writer: Well, yes, it's Very similar to that.
Producer: So, Isn't that kind of a rip-off? Whats the point of making this game if its gonna be a Complete rip-off?
Writer: What if we give the player the ability to build stuff in the game?
Producer: Thats different enough. So how do we do the building in this Fork-knife game of yours?
Writer: Well, we add a building mechanic where players can gather materials and construct forts and other structures to defend themselves.
Producer: So, they can build in the middle of a fight?
Writer: They sure can!
Producer: Won't that make the combat complicated and kind of confusing?
Writer: Oh, definitely. Super confusing. And we're going to have this cartoony art style, so it's all bright and colorful.
Producer: Cartoony art style?
Writer: Yes, sir, we want to attract a younger audience, you know, kids and teenagers.
Producer: Really? And what about older players?
Writer: They'll probably play it too. Some might even play it so much while filming themselves sitting, eating, and drinking inside a room infront of a bunch of cameras to a bunch of digital people on some kind of streaming-platform out there. And some older players might even be so good that they can be placed inside a room with other players that are as good as them.
Producer: Okay, okay, But wait. Why would older players be interested in a game designed for kids?
Writer: Because it's free.
Producer: Oh, older people love free things.
Writer: And we’ll have these things called Emotes where players can dance and do fun gestures for no reason.
Producer: Why would they need that?
Writer: To taunt other players and express themselves, and making it easier for other players to get kills!
Producer: And we're sure kids will love this?
Writer: Oh, absolutely. They'll be flossing in no time.
Producer: What’s flossing?
Writer: It’s one of the dances that we’ll include in the game.
Producer: Ah, okay, and how will we make money?
Writer: Super easy, barely an inconvenience.
Producer: How come?
Writer: Microtransactions.
Producer: Microtransactions?
Writer*: Yeah, Microtransactions. Players can buy this thing called V-Bucks, which is our in-game currency, to get skins, emotes, and other cosmetic items.
Producer: So, none of these items give players a competitive advantage?
Writer: Nope, just cosmetics.
Producer: And people will spend real money on that?
Writer: Oh, they definitely will.
Producer: How are you so sure?
Writer: Because we’ll make it really cool and hard to resist. Plus, we'll create this thing called FOMO.
Producer: FOMO?
Writer: Fear of Missing Out. We’ll have limited-time items so players feel pressured to buy them before they're gone.
Producer: So, we’re going to exploit psychological weaknesses?
Writer: Oh, for sure.
Producer: Exploiting psychological weaknesses is tight! So, how will players get to the Island?
Writer: They’ll skydive from a flying bus.
Producer: A flying bus?
Writer: Yeah, we’ll call it the Battle Bus.
Producer: Why would a bus be flying?
Writer: Because it's fun.
Producer: But How does it fly tho?
Writer: Listen, sir, i'm gonna need you to get all the way off my back about why the Battle Bus can fly using a very big sketchy pop-able baloon but only moves one direction, okay.
Producer: Okay, let me get off of that thing.
Writer: Oh, and every few minutes, a storm will shrink the play area, forcing players into a smaller and smaller circle until one player remains.
Producer: Why would a storm do that?
Writer: To make the game faster and more intense.
Producer: But thats not--- never mind.
Writer: And we’ll have different game modes, including solo, duo, and squads, so players can team up with friends.
Producer: What if players don’t have friends?
Writer: Then they’ll be loners. Solo mode is perfect for that.
Producer: And how will we keep the game fresh?
Writer: We'll have seasonal updates with new themes, items, and challenges.
Producer: Seasonal updates?
Writer: Plus, we’ll add crossover events with popular franchises from all our child hoods we can think off.
Producer: Like what?
Writer: Well, i'm just gonna throw some names out there, just top of my head, *Marvel, Star Wars, DC, Avatar, Family Guy, TMNT, POTC, Rick and Morty, and a Whole bunch of other stuff.
Producer: So, we’re going to have superheroes and nerds fighting each other in a game where you can build forts and dance?
Writer: Exactly.
Producer: That sounds amazing!
Writer: Oh, it’s going to be super amazing.
Producer: And that's Fortnite. So, what do you think?
Writer: I think we’ll make billions.
Producer: We're gonna be rich!
Producer: Wow, wow, wow. Wow.
Producer: But wait, you forgot to say what’s the story behind this game?
Writer: Oh, right, well, the island is constantly changing and evolving. At first, there isn't much backstory, only younger and older players ACTIVELY hunting each other down and killing each other, but over time, we introduce a series of events and lore that shape the game's world.
Producer: Interesting. What kind of events and lore are we talking about?
Writer: Well, Each season, we add new story elements to the game. For example, there's this mysterious organization called "The Imagined Order" that's manipulating the island. Players uncover clues and secrets about them as the game progresses.
Producer: So, there are hidden stories and mysteries?
Writer: Exactly. One season, we had a massive meteor strike that changed the landscape. Another season, a giant iceberg crashed into the island, bringing new areas to explore. We also introduced a volcanic eruption that altered the terrain significantly.
Producer: Sounds like a lot of natural disasters.
Writer: Ye ye ye. But all these events tie into the overarching narrative. There's this powerful artifact called the Zero Point at the center of the island, and it's the source of all these changes.
Producer: What’s the Zero Point?
Writer: It's a mysterious energy source that can manipulate time and space. Different factions and characters try to control it, leading to conflicts and alliances.
Producer: Who are these characters?
Writer: We've introduced various characters over time, like Jonesy, who starts as a standard avatar but becomes central to the story. He’s sort of the player’s guide and gets involved in all the major events.
Producer: And these characters, they have backstories?
Writer: Yes, each character has their own backstory and motives. Some are heroes trying to save the island, others are villains seeking power. We add new characters regularly to keep things fresh and engaging.
Producer: How do players learn about all this?
Writer: Through in-game events, cutscenes, and quests. For instance, we might have a live event where something dramatic happens, like a giant robot fighting a monster. These events often change the map and advance the storyline.
Producer: Live events? How do those work?
Writer: At specific times, we host live events where players can participate or just watch something big unfold. These events are usually massive, with millions of players logging in to witness them.
Producer: That sounds like a logistical nightmare.
Writer: It can be, but it creates a shared experience that players love. It's a huge part of what keeps the community engaged.
Producer: So, the story is dynamic and ever-changing?
Writer: Exactly. We keep evolving the narrative with each season, adding new mysteries and plot twists. It's like an ongoing TV show where the players are part of the story.
Producer: And this keeps players coming back?
Writer: Absolutely. The evolving story and frequent updates make sure there's always something new to discover and experience.
Producer: Sounds like you’ve thought of everything.
Writer: We’ve tried to make it as immersive and engaging as possible. The story is just one part of what makes Fortnite a unique and exciting game.
Producer: Well, I’m sold. Let’s make this game!

What have peoples experience been with your period after your first lap? Has anyone had a missed or delayed period after their diagnostic lap? Or after starting a hormone treatment for their endo?
I’m due for my first period since my diagnostic lap and it’s late. My last period was during the week of my surgery. But I’ve been having cramping and bloating like I would on my period for 4 days but no bleeding. I was on birth control and switched to norethindrone but it was during my BC placebo week. So I don’t know if it’s hormone related
I’ve been communicating with my providers office through my portal. But I haven’t gotten a response in a couple days. Has anybody else experienced this? Was it because of the stress from the surgery? Or hormone related?

For a backstory, this is a dream that I had few days ago, during my peak of having an Health Anxiety, despite getting reassurance from others (Doctors, close people who seem knowledgeable) that I am perfectly healthy. What happened was I reported to the doctor that I had abdominal pain, I was extremely stressed about this because I thought I was developing a serious illness, but the doctor said that everything is fine with me and that I am healthy, and he simply gave me medications to treat things like Irritable bowel disease. Before that I had bleeding from my rectal area which started month ago, and the doctor started to immedietaly send me to colonoscopy without first testing anything, since he assumed that I may be developing some illness or desease. This made me both angry and scared too, and eventualy made me hypochodriac, that I had to go to a doctor multiple times to see if there are not any problematic things with me, despite that later on the doctors said that I am perfectly healthy. One time I wen't to doctor, he said I was healthy, and I was literaly in tears crying.
Again, last time I wen't to the doctor, I told him that my stool bowels we're dark brown and I lost some weight, which I started to assume it was a terrible illness, but my doctor reassured me that I am very healthy and I dont need to worry, he said that if I had anything bad he would have spotted it already (like low blood pressure, and fewer, etc) to this day I am still pretty anxious about my health, through to a much lesser degree than before.
This is the dream:
It began with some sort of like a city that looks similar to the city I live in, albeit heavily like looking different, it was very cloudy, the clouds we're heavy and gray. I was in school (Even though I am 25 years old and I finished school), there I meet that teacher assistant that I disliked during elementary school, fairly enough we got along well in the dream.
The school enviroment also was similar to a shop market aswell, so there we're random food and sweets. I picked some random sweets and I started eating them, but not paying money for them. The teacher assistant obviously was dissapointed and somewhat angry for recklessly eating sweets and not paying money for them.
Then something happened, one of the sweets I've eaten was actualy an Eldrich God like of being. It was very lanky but tall that it managed to surprass the earth's atmosphere and reach space.
The Eldritch God, in It's appearance was very. very thin, it resembles like a tree with random branches coming out of It's body, and I was somewhat scared and started to roam around the city to find a house or any roof that would cover me from the Eldritch God's attacks from the sky. Then I realised that I've eaten those sweets (They look like some sort of gummy curry thing), and part of the Eldritch God's is inside of me, since I've eaten the sweets.
I've entered one particlar building and found a roof, however all of the appartments had someone (Random people) live in, so I couldn't find my own roof, a protection from the Eldritch God. Going up the building to find a roof higher the building, I've started encountering Islamic State terrorists that roam the building, I tried to hide from them and from the Eldritch God simulateniously, however the Terrorists found me and started to try to shoot me, which this scenario it somewhat resembled a video game, and I didn't actualy felt that scared of the terrorists as I felt like it was like a video game.
Later on I found myself roaming the city, went away from the Islamic state terrorists, and realised there are multiple Eldritch Gods exist in this world, soon to get to earth. The dream ended here.

I have never been the jealous type. This is just one of those situations that has left me feeling a little uneasy. For context, my boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over a month and it was spontaneous. We’ve known eachother since last September but only just started seeing eachother and dating recently. Even before we started dating I took notice to how many friends he has and how many people he’s going out with and partying with. My boyfriend and I are long distance (two states away) so we’ve been seeing eachother about once a week and we try to make a big day out of it. He recently got a new apartment so he took me to a supermarket. On the way there he mentions how he wants to find a birthday gift for his friend, we’ll call her (22/f) Jillian. My boyfriend and Jillian have known eachother since middle school but they haven’t been close friends until freshman year of college (for context he just finished his second year). As we’re walking through the supermarket it was all he was talking about how he has to find a present for Jillian. When he brings up different stories about her throughout our time here, he’ll call her different names like “jil jil” or “jilly” or “jilly bug”. That’s where I started to feel a little ick. Then he drops the “oh I think I’m gonna get her flowers.” I felt my heart sunk it was once of the first times I really felt jealous. I don’t know this girl I’ve never met her before and this is the first time I’ve heard him talk about her. Like i said, I have never been the type to be jealous. I just don’t understand why my boyfriend would bring me out to go buy flowers for another girl I wish he would’ve waited until I wasn’t there. Later on he wound up buying them matching bracelets too. I don’t care about him seeing other girls and hanging out with them that’s never been an issue. I’m jealous towards the situation. He’s never bought me flowers.

Bonjour à tous,
C’est mon premier post ici, je ne sais pas trop à quoi m’attendre et quelle genre de réponses je vais recevoir. J’ai hâte de vous lire !
Je vais utiliser des noms fictifs.
Pour un peu de contexte, j’ai écrit la lettre ci-dessous pour mon « ex », je ne sais pas si je peux vraiment utiliser le mot ex. Nous avons toujours qualifié notre relation comme étant simplement David & Mathieu. Quand les gens nous demandaient si nous étions en couple, nous répondions que non, c’était seulement David & Mathieu.
Nous avons été amis pendant 1 an et demi avant de commencer une dynamique différente. Ce n'était ni prévu ni voulu, c’est juste arrivé très naturellement. Il a toujours été quelqu’un de spécial pour moi, je ne sais pas comment l’expliquer, mais d’aussi loin que je puisse me souvenir, il a été spécial pour moi et je lui disais.
Deux choses à savoir sur lui, c’est qu’il a un style d’attachement évitant, lui-même le reconnaît. Alors c’était parfois compliqué, il ne me rassurait jamais sur rien, avait des blocages du style nous ne pouvons pas nous voir en semaine, et très souvent je ne pouvais pas le toucher (affectueusement) parce qu’il avait besoin d’espace. Mais je sais qu'il a fait des efforts et qu'il est sorti de sa zone de confort pour nous. Il a commencé de lui-même à me tenir la main en public, à s’ouvrir de plus en plus et m’a présenté à des personnes importantes pour lui. Ça ne semble pas être grand-chose, mais pour une personne avec un type d'attachement évitant, c’était déjà beaucoup.
Ce qui rendait la situation encore plus compliquée, c’est qu'il était fraysexuel aussi. Alors plus la relation évoluait, plus nous étions proches, plus il perdait l’intérêt sexuel envers moi. Il avait toujours besoin de sexe, mais avec moi, ce n’était pas possible. Là encore, il était conscient de comment il était et nous en avons toujours parlé ouvertement.
David & Mathieu ca duré 7 mois, ce qui a fait en sorte que ça se termine, ce sont des disputes que nous avons eues vers la fin. J’ai commencé à être insecure par rapport à sa sexualité, le fait qu’il était de retour sur des applications de rencontre (il me disait que c’était juste pour baiser) - je le crois, mais ça me mettait quand même insecure et il avait de la difficulté à me rassurer. Il se fâchait et disait que je mettais sa parole en doute. De plus, j’ai ramené des choses du passé, comme un gars avec qui il a vécu quelque chose en parallèle de nous deux durant le premier mois de David & Mathieu. De plus vers la fin, il me verbalisait son besoin d’avoir de l’espace et de minimiser les contacts, j’ai eu aussi de la difficulté à lui offrir sa. Je crois être du type d’attachement anxieux, alors pour moi c’était compliqué de répondre à certaines de ses demandes. Mais quand nous étions ensemble c’était vraiment bien, nous nous le disions souvent que les meilleurs moments ensemble c’était ceux où nous étions juste nous deux seuls.
Bref, il n’a donné comme raisons d’arrêter nous, le fait que je mettais trop souvent sa parole en doute, que je ramenais trop le passé et qu'il avait l’impression de ne pas pouvoir faire des choses qu’il avait le droit de faire (coucher avec d’autres) et le fait que jetait pas capable de lui donner l’espace dont il avait besoin. Il a toujours été honnête sur le fait qu’il ne voulait pas perdre sa liberté. Je n'ai jamais eu l’intention de lui enlever, mais parfois j'avais besoin de discuter pour me sentir bien, lui avait de la difficulté avec ça.
Bon, voici enfin la lettre. Ça fait bientôt maintenant une semaine que nous n'avons plus de contacts. Nous n'avons jamais vraiment eu de discussion pour clore le tout, il m’a partagé, sa décision au téléphone, j’ai mal réagi, j’ai essayé de le convaincre de changer sa position et voilà.
Le lendemain qu’il a décidé de me partager de quitter nous, il a tout de même accepté de venir faire une activité avec moi, mais il m’a dit seulement parce que je lui avais dit que ça me ferait du bien et suite à cette activité il m’a redonné les choses à moi qu’il avait chez lui. Moi j’ai encore des choses avec moi. Dites-moi ce que vous pensez de la lettre.
Merci.
Je respecte et je comprends ton choix.
J’me suis posé la question à savoir si c’est aussi ce que je voulais et que maybe j’étais vraiment juste delulu de penser que non.
Je ne suis pas dans l’attente ni le besoin que tu répondes à ce messages. C’était important pour moi de te partager mon constat à tête reposée et non pas en étant dans des émotions irrationnelles. Je ne suis pas dans la culpabilisation, je ne prends pas tout le blâme sur moi mais je parle de ce qui m’appartiens. Je ne suis pas fâché, déçu et je n’ai aucun sentiment négatif à ton égard. J’le sais que tu es une bonne personne avec des bonnes intentions et que tu n’as jamais eu l’intention de me blesser.
Ta décision, je l’accepte beaucoup plus facilement à tête reposée et depuis que j’ai finalement pu comprendre que d’avoir contact avec moi te fessais maintenant plus de mal que de bien. J’ai toujours voulu ton bien et te faire sentir spécial. Tu sais ce que je pense de toi, ce que j’te disais, ça jamais été fake ou pour te faire plaisir, c’était simplement la vérité. Pour moi, quand j’étais avec toi, c’était toi le plus…you know et j’avais aucun intérêt à détourner mon regard. J’ai jamais joué de game avec toi ni essayer de te vendre du rêve. J’suis conscient que ça pouvait jouer maybe contre moi et je m’en tape. Mais honnêtement je n’ai jamais eu le sentiment que tu prenais avantage de ça.
Je ne sais pas comment tu vies la situation mais j’espère que tu vas bien. Pas que je pense que tu care about that, mais j’ai déjà arête de parler au dude à qui je parlais durant notre dernière activité ensemble. Je ne suis pas le genre de personne qui saute dans autre chose pour ce sentir mieux, je ne trouve pas ça sain ni respectueux et c’est tout simplement pas moi.
Désolé d’avoir perdu l’important de vu et d’avoir trop souvent focus sur le passé et des choses qui n’avaient aucune cibole d’importance. Désolé de ne plus vers la fin avoir été dans le respect et l’écoute, d’avoir donné le sentiment que j’te fessais pas confiance/je voulais te restreindre/d’avoir pas su mieux te comprendre/de ne pas avoir assez affirmé mes besoins et de ne pas avoir su te donner l’espace dont t’avais besoin. Quand jte disais que nous étions mieux que ça, et ben j’ai fail et je t’ai laissé tombé d’une certaine façon, j’le reconnais et j’en suis désolé. J’ai foirré et c’est correct de faire des erreurs. Tsé l’être humain est parfois mal fait, perdre force à réaliser des choses qui étaient pourtant évidente.
J'ai du travail à faire sur moi-même sur plusieurs aspects. Je dois apprendre à croire, éviter de me faire des scénarios, laisser le passé là où il est, verbaliser plus clairement mes besoins et limites, apprendre à réaliser que ce que j’ai devant moi est vrai et apprendre à dire : 'Cette chose me fait peur, je ne sais pas comment l'apprivoiser, je ne sais pas comment ça va nous affecter, parlons-en.' Je suis toujours le même dude qu’il y a une semaine, je n’ai pas déjà magiquement changé, mais ce que je peux te dire en toute confiance, c'est qu'il y a eu une prise de conscience et que j'ai un réel désir d'être meilleur.
Je sais que pour toi, nous, c’était un challenge et maybe sometime déstabilisant, ça te sortait de la zone de confort. J’aurai pu prendre ça plus en considération et m’assurer que tu te sentes bien au lieu de te rajouter de la pression et des frustrations.
Moi et toi nous sommes des personnes particulières, pour qui c’est pas easy de bâtir certaines dynamique, nous méritions d’avoir ce que nous avions, mais avec les enjeux d’la fin, parfois ce n’était pas facile.
Je n’ai jamais voulu quelque chose de conventionnel. Pour moi, répondre à la question 'Êtes-vous en couple?' par 'Non, c’est juste David & Mathieu' j’en étais fier et j’aimais ça, pour moi y’avait pas besoin d'explications supplémentaires.
Je n’ai jamais demandé ou espérer que t’ailles les même exigences que celles que je m’imposais à moi même. J’ai toujours été conscient de tes besoins. Le fait que pour moi c’était important de ne pas me faire toucher et tout le tralala par d’autres, ça m’appartenais juste à moi, j’aurai aimé que nous puissions naviguer dans ça plus sainement.
Avoir essayé David & Mathieu n'était pas une erreur pour moi, cela a été positif sur bien des aspects. Et comme je te l’ai déjà dit ce qu'il y avait me suffisait, toi tu me suffisais. Les enjeux de la fin pour moi étaient pour la plupart prévisibles et tous surmontables et pesaient moins dans la balance comparativement au reste. David & Mathieu c’était particulier, imparfait et parfait en même temps, le fait que les bests moments étaient ceux où moi étions seuls day & night, que y’avait ce sentiment que main dans la main c’était nous vs le reste et le sentiment de fierté. Je nous souhaite de retrouver tout cela.
Quand tu me disais que tu étais chanceux de m’avoir, j’ai aussi été chanceux de t’avoir et j’espère que tu sais pourquoi.
Laissons-nous du temps, au bon moment et si nous le voulons tous les deux, essayons de voir s'il est possible de reconstruire une dynamique dans laquelle nous nous sentirons tous les deux bien. Nous avons toujours réussi à bâtir du mieux avec le passé, espèrons que ce sera encore le cas. Nous formons une bonne équipe lorsque nous sommes dans le respect et l’écoute.
Btw, j'ai la bague de ton grand-père. Je la portais au doigt quand je suis sorti de ta voiture. Si tu veux que je te rende tes affaires rapidement, fais-le moi savoir. Sinon, ne t'inquiète pas, je vais en prendre soin.
Ça me fera toujours plaisir d'avoir de tes nouvelles, mais je comprends que toi et moi avons besoin d'espace pour le moment. Oui, moi aussi j'en ai besoin.
Si un jour nous reprenons contact, je n’ai ni le désir ni le besoin de reparler des enjeux que nous avons vécu. Moi mindset c’est d’aller vers du mieux, pas de retomber dans le négatif.
Peut-être qu'un jour j'écrirai une chanson de 10 minutes sur un David qui laissait toujours 56 000 trucs chez moi, qui sait. 🤷🏻‍♂️ (Il adore une chanson de 10min de Taylor S qui parle d’un ex, alors c’est une référence à ça)
Je ne t'oublie pas
Bye for now

Thanks, everyone, for your prayers, texts, and calls. I am absolutely fine. I learned a lesson about my arrogance. I hope to keep this lesson with me forever.
Yesterday Mom filed the appeal to the suspension. She gave me permission to have "a jailbreak" so I can run in the Park. "After you run, take a shower and get dressed for school. I predict they will be calling you before 10:00 a.m. to tell you your suspension has been canceled. Have a good day and don't you dare gloat about what happened. You are no hero and you really have to figure out how to make amends."
Between yesterday and today I chanted hours and hours to understand what had happened. First of all, I feel very good now and that is the biggest benefit. Second, I found out who the anonymous tipper was. At first I had assumed that it was the lurker here who keeps on downvoting all of our posts. But, as it turns out, I got a call from one of my Jammy girls. She was really worried about me and couldn't pull together the courage to tell me face to face. I really understand and from my chanting I realize I have to become the type of person who can make it easy for the people around me to speak up.
I really appreciate all the advice I received telling me I now need to turn poison to medicine. It's true. Whether it's one day or four days, it's not enough for me to "serve" my suspension. It might be the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, but I have to figure out how to make amends with Mr. Sutherland, the Dean. I have to make a human connection with him. So this is the email I sent to him early in the morning:

Dear Dean Sutherland, I am hoping we can sit down together face to face to clear the air after I serve my suspension. I was clearly in the wrong. What made it worse was that I wasn't hearing what you were all trying to tell me. I know I have to work on my mouth. I don't feel right about just "taking" my punishment. I won't feel right unless I can make amends. I am also hoping we can see the humanity in each other. I would feel very happy about doing community service for your office after school everyday. Thank you for reading this.

Within 5 minutes I received a response from him: "Good idea, let's do it."
Lita is really on max between her internship and school. She has also been piling on a lot of dance and acting classes to get ready for her meeting today with Benjamin & Co. And she is reading the original George Bernard Shae Pygmalian to better understand the subtext of Eliza Doolittle. Still, she found time to meet with Coach after school yesterday. Lita doesn't have the time to post but she told me what happened and asked me to share what Coach told her over a slice of pizza.

I will always be your coach, whether you are in this school or not, whether you get your ass suspended or not. That is simply the relationship between a coach and her athletes. If you get into a fight in school you get suspended, right? But if you get into a fight during a competition, you get thrown out of the game but not suspended from school. Why? Because things happen in the heat of a game. An athlete learns from making mistakes. It's the job of coaches to point out the mistakes. It's not easy for either of them. I want you to tell Heidi that I love and respect her very much and that will never change. When I see her next, I want to see her with her head held up high (she actually said "tits up" 🫢)* and shoulders back strong. But also tell her I will suspend her ass again and again whenever she crosses that line.

All right. Enough said. And I just received an email from the school. My suspension is lifted and I should report immediately.

tl;dr I’m having a problem with my gf, we always fight every month because of the same thing and we come back stronger then before, then things will go down again and will fight again same thing every month.
my problem is i give a lot from my side like attention love words and complement, i’m so clingy with my girlfriend, i like to hold her hand hug her kissing her i never get tired or board from her, so i ask to receive the same, i wanna see the love the attachment the things which i see as normal in my pov, for her she have mood swing sometimes she love me so much sometimes she want me to be there but far like she doesn’t want me to be near from her touch her things like this..
i have a bad habit which is when she’s tired i still wont to be there and be clingy to her.
this week i was far from her for 1 mouth and i missed her a lot and i came back to her and she met me and all i got was a fast hug and then she’s done and i had to keep asking for more until se agreed after that she was sleepy and and not in the mood to touch my hand and when i complain about this she will fight me back and tells me she does her best and i don’t appreciate her effort and she tires to change for me and i still complain
am i wrong for that i mean i’m clingy ngl but to my gf in the end of the day she’s my first and i don’t know much about these things hope you can help

I’m currently 7 weeks pp and I’ve been breastfeeding/pumping since my milk came in. I started pumping to relieve engorgement but have created a bit of a problem. I usually pump twice a day on top of nursing on demand. I’ll pump first thing in the morning after nursing and once in the evenings for my partner to give a bottle before bed. I’d like to drop my morning pump but I’m looking for confirmation it will all be okay. I currently have about 350-400oz of frozen milk stashed, I can’t fit anymore in the freezer and I can’t really afford another one right now. I’m hoping I can drop this morning pump since it’s just “extra” milk and it won’t affect what my baby needs. Does anyone have any experience with this?
Edited to add: My mom guilt is very real. My adult brain says all will be fine and just do it, but my mom brain says I’m somehow harming my supply and ultimately taking away from my baby. Such anxiety over something that should be simple..

My partner and I have a feral cat, 6ish yr old Missy, who lives in our apartment with us. We would like to get her a kitten for companionship but could use advice on introducing them. Everything I’ve seen talks about introducing their scents to each other and using treats/pets for positive association. Trouble is…we can’t get close enough to Missy to pet her, let alone shove a scented object in her face to smell. She’s not aggressive and has never hissed or swatted at us, even when we have to trap her to cut her nails or take her to the vet. Any advice on how to make the introduction?
Some context: my partner and her ex adopted Missy a few years ago when she just wandered into their house. She had been hanging out in their backyard every day and they fed her and even built her a little house out there that was heated and waterproof. Anyway, they already had two cats when Missy came in and she loved playing with them and snuggling with one of them especially so we know that she’s fine with other cats and think she would benefit from having a companion.

After suffering under a toxic work environment, I was prescribed escitalopram/lexapro for severe depression and anxiety. I have been out of that work environment for a while now, and, following my psychiatrists guidance, I started titrating off Lexapro, first to 5mg, and then to 0mg. Initially, the side effects were minor, but last week, I began to experience diziness, and brain zaps that were so extreme that I couldn't do anything but lie in bed and watch things on my phone, I couldn't even read as the brain zaps would fire off every time I moved my eyes too quickly. I called the doctor and they advised me to go back on 5mg, and titrate off more slowly, dropping down to 2.5mg after a few weeks, then 2.5mg every other day before hitting 0mg.
Yesterday, I restarted on 5mg, and my diziness and brain zaps have already gone. However, it has been replaced with an itense anger, unlike anything I've felt in a while. My husband and I had a minor disagreement about how to decorate our own home and I was so angry I could barely sleep, and I had to use a stress ball to calm myself down. I didn't take out any of the anger on him , I'm quite good at preventing my negative emotions from affecting my interactions with people - however I feel that the level of anger I have is so disproportionate to our disagreement. I've started getting into this habit of ruminating on ways people have hurt me in the past. I try to use my cognitive behavioural therapy to stir away from that, but I'm currently going through my day with this simmering anger towards people who have "wronged" me. I even raged at a video game, which is so out of character. I've managed to calm down a little bit, and I'll go to the gym later to try and wind down further, but has anyone else experienced this??
I've titrated off other antidepressants before and have never felt anything close to this before. If I could go back in time, I wouldn't have accepted a Lexapro prescription, I really hope these shroom/ketamine antidepressant trials produce a superior product fast.

tl;dr I’m having a problem with my gf, we always fight every month because of the same thing and we come back stronger then before, then things will go down again and will fight again same thing every month.
my problem is i give a lot from my side like attention love words and complement, i’m so clingy with my girlfriend, i like to hold her hand hug her kissing her i never get tired or board from her, so i ask to receive the same, i wanna see the love the attachment the things which i see as normal in my pov, for her she have mood swing sometimes she love me so much sometimes she want me to be there but far like she doesn’t want me to be near from her touch her things like this..
i have a bad habit which is when she’s tired i still wont to be there and be clingy to her.
this week i was far from her for 1 mouth and i missed her a lot and i came back to her and she met me and all i got was a fast hug and then she’s done and i had to keep asking for more until se agreed after that she was sleepy and and not in the mood to touch my hand and when i complain about this she will fight me back and tells me she does her best and i don’t appreciate her effort and she tires to change for me and i still complain
am i wrong for that i mean i’m clingy ngl but to my gf in the end of the day she’s my first and i don’t know much about these things hope you can help

anyone else get super triggered by “it happened” posts? it’s hard for me because i had emetophobia for the longest time and got s* for the first time in forever last year. it didn’t “cure” me, it was horribly traumatic and made my mental health so bad to the point i became a shell of a person. to this day im destroyed inside and out. i have flashbacks from the incident and can’t differentiate feelings in my body to the point ive lost 12lbs in the past month because idk the difference between hunger and sickness. it’s horrifying. just wondering if anyone can relate… i feel so alone and embarrassed. i don’t even want to get better i just want to give up.