This game is 100% indomitable. Had a friend rave about this game and told me to try it, come to find out this game is only for people who are tenacious at an unhealthy level. If you enjoy dying, losing, burning eyes, getting you’re butt kick in, rolling around on the floor, not being able to casually play with friends, and a “you died” screen, then hey, this game is for you! Otherwise, I’d NEVER recommend this game to anyone who play games to have fun. Most of the concepts are cool and all, but there are way too many things it lacks to make it enjoyable. Way too over rated and honestly the most masochist game ever made. What are your opinions on it?

Hi everyone, could you please submit a dream you’ve had to my form?
I have been super interested in dreams and have been writing my own down since 2016, I read some article saying if you do this it helps you remember them and will lead you to have more. It seems to work.
I love hearing/reading other people’s dreams and had an idea to create a book filled with all types of dreams people have had. So, I’ve been reaching out to as many groups and communities as I can.
I didn’t feel comfortable going around the internet and nabbing people’s dreams, and it’s much easier to get permission to use a dream if the person submits it themselves, so I created a form for people to fill out and submit their dreams anonymously, or be credited, and would love to get a ton. You can submit more than one.
Feel free to also share this post and the form with your friends or on other social media!
I don’t have a lot of the details worked out, as I’ve never created a book before, but I can post updates if anyone is interested.
Dreams
Thank you. :)

Posting on a throwaway bc paranoia
Me (M19) and my Fp (M20) have been in a serious romantic relationship for quite a while, we both have bpd and he’s being evaluated for possible schizophrenia, we’ve both been open about our mental health and since the beginning, we’ve been open about our mutual fps on each other and due to it, our separation anxiety. Due to recent events which I won’t go into specifics to in attempts to keep this post as short as possible, my Fp was sent to the psychward for about a week or so, he had to give up his phone just about two hours ago and I’ve been at a total loss, I don’t know what to do with myself and I can’t stop crying, I don’t know how he is, how he’s doing, what he’s doing, nothing. We are long distance due to college starting in a few months so I cannot visit him, he wrote down my number before they drove him to facility so he wouldn’t forget it but it’s likely they won’t let him call me anytime soon. I’m in contact with his mom but our conversations have been limited and I am at a total loss.
I’ve tried distracting myself but there’s nothing i can do, i have no friends to rely on, I have no enjoyment for anything anymore, watching videos and playing games leave me with nothing, I feel a sense of emptiness so deep that it’s crippling, I don’t know what to do. He’s my support system, he’s my everything and without him I have nothing and I am nothing, I have awful thoughts and memories that I try to fend away but i cannot, nothing helps and I’m hurting. I am an artist, I have art I owe that I must work on but I can’t get myself to do anything, my hands are hurting, I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t think or I think too much, I still can’t tell.
The worst part of it all is that I was forced to stop taking my medication suddenly after taking it consistently everyday since April. For some context, i started having an allergic reaction yesterday, mainly just hives, I still don’t know what from, today the hives were still here even after I spent the day yesterday taking allergy relief and lathering myself up In anti itch shit that really didn’t help much. I went to the doctor today once they started to swell, initially I suspected my medication because I didn’t eat or do anything out of the ordinary (i don’t go outside) but after being seen by the doctor and had blood taken, he ruled it out and I fainted, had a panic attack, had some stuff injected in me and all that good shit. I called my psychiatrist right afterwards for good measure and she was unable to speak with me since she was with another patient but her receptionist contacted me after speaking with her and I was informed to stop taking my medication all together until we could speak.
My next appointment was meant to be June 3rd but I am considering calling in tomorrow and arranging a sooner appointment or something because I feel like I’m losing my goddamn mind(
I just feel like I have no direction right now and I miss him so badly im hurting physically and I don’t know when illl be able to finally hear from him again, I only have him, I have no one else, if he’s gone, im done for.
TLDR; I was forced to suddenly stop taking my medication due a medical emergency and my fp is being sent to a psych ward for about a week, it’s been two hours and I can’t stop crying.

Conspiracy theories involving “elite” pedophile rings have recently been dominating social media in a disorienting frenzy. They have been around for some time but in this century rose back to popularity during the 2016 Election cycle. This crop, at least, took root with what became known as “Pizzagate.” Promoters of that conspiracy theory in 2016 used social media platforms to make unfounded but viral allegations that Hillary Clinton and other prominent Democrats were running a pedophile ring out of the basement of a pizzeria even though that restaurant had no basement, or any ties to known politicians other than the typical flesh pressing (Phrasing I know) moments fit for a picture hung on the wall. Since then, the dark theme of Pizzagate has found new life with permutations forming part of the #Qanon conspiracy theory, incorporated under the umbrella term “pedogate.” The gist of the #pedogate conspiracy theory is that global elites (politicians, celebrities, and wealthy businesspersons) are covertly involved in a far-reaching ring that uses young children for sexual purposes. “What most of these conspiracy theories involve in one way or another is laying accusations of pedophilia or involvement in pedophile rings at the feet of people that they despise or hate, and during the 16’ election cycle, Democrats were a wide target for an opposing political movement that had hijacked the rival Republican party. Pizzagate originated with the “alt right” and “alt lite,” far right extremists who range from outright white supremacists to those who publicly shun racists but otherwise fall in step with their belief systems. Pizzagate jumped from the fringes to the mainstream because as it denigrated Hillary Clinton, it sucked in supporters of then-candidate Donald Trump. After the election all mention of pedogate seemed to be put on a simmer while other National outrages boiled over (#Covid #RussiaGate #BLM) and just like clockwork (heading into our next election cycle has been turned back up. The pedogate conspiracy and all associated stories employ a centuries-old tactic: playing on deep-seated human anxieties by conjuring images of imperiled children, the purest and defenseless victim of any manner of injustice. An example in the modern era of weaponized conspiracy was the satanic panic of the 1980s, in which a wave of hysteria over alleged child molestation at daycare centers swept the nation. But while that phenomenon was a moral panic attributable, at least in part, to social anxiety over white middle class women entering the work force en masse for the first time and entrusting their children to others, the current conspiracy theories about pedophile rings equate to similar propaganda. They carry a danger for stirring up violence. If you want to elicit violent action the way to do it is through hate and fear. Once you target and label a population as pedophiles, you can do anything you like to that population with full excuse being given to the myth you’ve wrapped around it. That’s not to say fears of child abuse or sex trafficking are unfounded. There are many as pedophilia has ancient roots and in many cases was encourage by many world cultures and religions a lot later into Civilization than we’d like to admit. The International Labor Organization reports that 25 percent of the world’s 40.3 million victims of human trafficking are children. The most vulnerable, according to the National Human Trafficking Hotline, are migrants, runaways, the homeless, and youngsters who have been victims of violence. Despite their obsession over the topic, conspiracy followers aren’t worked up about those children who are in true harm’s way. In the world of propaganda, it’s never about real children. Instead, it’s about what children represent. The children imperiled by conspiracy theories, in other words, are only metaphors. Children carry a vast amount of weight in any society, but especially modern ones when they’re expected to survive past the age of five. It wasn’t as intense before the 18th century when child mortality rates were really high. They represent the future, and all that is beautiful and decent and honest in a society, because they are innocent. For most people also, the meaning of their existence is rooted in their children. Children are eschatological, they represent death for us, and what is coming behind us after we are gone. They also represent the threat of loss, if they disappear, if they die, that is the death of society. That’s why they became so crucial and central to Cold War propaganda. The real terror of the nuclear holocaust would be the death of the children, because that’s the death of everyone. A recent example of this is in a recent police investigation into conspiracy claims of PizzaGate style accusation of Portland’s Voodoo Doughnuts. Detectives attempted to contact the person accusing Voodoo Doughnuts on social media of running a pedophile ring. The accuser did not cooperate with investigators and it’s been documented in other coverage online that they had become agitated and accused the Police with complicity when tracked down in person, even though they were attempting to investigate. The pendulum of conspiracy theories about systematic child abuse has swung back and forth for centuries. Examples such as blood libel, when Jewish communities were attacked over false allegations of murdering and consuming Christian children in the Middle Ages. In Europe, During the Thirty Years War, entire villages were put to the sword because it was believed they were abusing children of the other religions. One characteristic that helps Pizzagate-style conspiracy theories gain popularity is that they function like a puzzle game and give its audience a large level of involvement through social media. A lot of conspiracy theories are oracular, where the information comes from one source an oracle. Then there are others where there are a few people who promote the notions, almost like gurus or a conspiracy priesthood. But Pizzagate, it’s more of what one would call a participatory conspiracy theory. Participatory conspiracy theories lay out a scenario or situation and then they ask their audience, ‘what more can you find out about this, what more can you add?’ It turns the audience into willing participants, some knowing they are creating a destructive madlib and other (potential real victims) caking on mystical distraction to issues that have been unreported or scars that have not bee properly treated. The thing about participatory conspiracy theories is it can really create a devoted following because it gives people something to do, it makes them feel they can solve the whole thing or uncover new aspects to it. Once you get that energy going it’s almost self-sustaining. Followers of the Qanon conspiracy theory, call themselves “bakers” because their protagonist “Q” pops up on Internet message boards and leaves “crumbs” (i.e., clues), and they are tasked with picking up the crumbs in order to solve the puzzle. (“Q” is supposed to reference the character’s government security clearance level).
#Q followers believe an even more incoherent version of Pizzagate. This is largely a right-wing fantasy that originated in a series of incoherent posts on #4chan in 2017 by someone calling themselves #QAnon. Following on the heels of similar idiocy such as Pizzagate, it advances a fantastic web of deceit that wraps up Trumpism, deep state fearmongering, evil, satanic pedophilia rings controlled by the Democratic Party, investigations into Russian meddling in the 2016 US election, the Las Vegas shooting, and New World Order paranoia into a package easily and wholeheartedly promoted by internet cesspools and far-right personalities such as Alex Jones. The premise is that President Trump is secretly working to take down a global ring of elite, cannibalistic, satanic pedophiles. And the investigation into Russian meddling into the 2016 election, led by former FBI director Robert Mueller, is actually an investigation into the so-called “deep state”, where a cabal of evil, globalists, including Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, are responsible for everything from a global pedophile ring to the mass shooting in Las Vegas in 2017. According to the enlightened, when Trump awkwardly took a drink from a bottle of Fiji water at a press conference in November 2017, it wasn’t because he was thirsty; it was actually a secret signal to those in the know that the annihilation of deep state pedophiles had begun (or was about to begin). Because as everyone knows, Fiji is a hot spot for child trafficking. ( I could go on and on with this poorly thought-out shit, I will spare you ) The role the Internet and social media play in helping to spread such insanity can’t be underestimated. Just a few decades earlier, conspiracy theorists would identify each other using letters to the editor printed in newspapers and magazines. It was a lot harder to identify your fellow conspiracy theorists. You would have to physically meet to swap your stories or send letters or call. They would set up these groups that would communicate by newsletter. They would meet in a physical space, like someone’s living room. I personally witnessed people from my childhood, dutifully photocopying newsletters they had received in the mail to give to others (Primarily at my #JW congregation, how ironic). Now obviously it can go much more quickly, because you can identity people immediately. You can quickly share ideas and the data you’ve collected. The Internet allows such people to exist in bubbles where they rarely have their beliefs challenged. The extraordinarily polarized society we’re in right now has made people less willing to seek out other view points. Because of the internet you have less chance of doing this. There’s very little incentive to look outside one’s own bubble once they have become invested in a conspiracy theory. Once you start to act out on those behaviors you are forced to double down by repeating the act to prove it was a just act. Eventually you get caught up in a movement that totally defines your conscious and you can’t get out of it. The second you step out of that world view your actions go back to being reprehensible. Now the question becomes, “What’s the harm? If it sheds light on child abuse, then isn’t it still productive?” The answer in this case is a resounding NO. In my opinion and PAINFUL experience, the root cause and sustaining factors of institutionalized child sex abuse are all things that would counter your typical Conspiracy Nut’s world view, thus causing a complete blackout to the problems. The entity taking part in the harming of children on a local and tangible level aren’t some suit and tie wearing global elitist. It’s a guidance counselor, youth pastor, unvetted young substitute teacher, aunt/uncle/cousin/neighbor. It’s anyone who has been given routine private access to a child’s mind and body because of the social conventions that have been protected for generations by our relatives whether they themselves are guilty of abuse or not. In all the Qanon madness I also kept very close tabs on the pending prosecution of the Boy scouts of America and never saw any widely shared memes about their involvement in the abuse syndicate. Why is this? How is this so? Aren’t these people watching the news, seeing the court records and hearing the individual cases being brought against Scout Leaders (SOME OF WHO RAN THEIR OWN NETWORKS!!)? When I would find mention of accusation it was met with the ever scarce “skepticism” because if the media is covering it, it must be a plot to destroy the organization. There are now non-for profit organizations setting up victim funds and protections for people to come out with their stories and somehow THIS is the fake ruse. Some that know me know that I was a Jehovah’s Witness as a youth/teen/young adult. That chapter of my life could fill many chapters and the research on the organization, the real true black and white history of the religion would honestly surprise you. I saw what I now know was abuse, I personally experienced abuse in many forms. The perpetrators involved are either still Witnesses or are dead or have moved “away from the organization”. But one thing that was left intact in each situation was the secret that they prey on children. The parents, these organizations and the collective promise to keep up appearances are directly to blame for the suffering untold thousands, millions of children and broken adults. All for what? Pride and Vanity and a commitment to all involved to protect them from the “mean old world” despite allowing predators to eat their children from within. Being a #JW was a very interesting experience. It provides a very efficient form of insulation from outside society and allows people involved to view the chaos from afar. There is this persistent (albeit false) sense of shared peace that members have. It’s as though for three days a week you go to this meeting where no matter what, everyone has a smile and feels about things EXACTLY how you do. There is no cursing, there are no politics, there surely isn’t any destructive influences that would tarnish your chances of salvation. For a parent this is a refuge when raising a child in a world that is dangerously unpredictable. A Child that you are unable (or unwilling) to teach coping skills to get along by societal standards, A child you want to protect by hiding. This is problem #1. As an adult the congregation presents an avenue for which you can act and behave in a way that allows you to reconcile your past, a way to have less of those nights awake because you think about past wrongs you’ve committed against people. It’s the proverbial band-aid for a guilty, bruised, destroyed conscious of any size. Coming into the organization takes nothing more than the desire to change, publicly declaring your willingness to hand over your life to God (The organization). Bam, You’re in! No credit check, no background check. This is problem #2. A JW is taught that “every facet is an asset” (Ministerial Servants know what I’m talking about). What this means is that every facet of your life is an asset to the organization to spread its word. If the world see’s their product’s application into your life and thereby how much better it is than a normal person’s, then they’ve made an “Effective Witness” to the world. This causes Witnesses of any age to allow almost every facet of their life to be a tool by the organization. For a parent this includes their children. This is problem #3 When you get a culture that insulates itself from the real world, that allows you to enter without any coherent vetting, give access to children whose parents feel obligated to present as a “witness” to the lifestyle. You get a twisted corridor in which victims can get lost for a lifetime and predators can hide in plain sight. For any proponents of the “Save-The-Children” movement to not take a step back and really analyze their local community and lifestyle through these lenses only illustrates that child abuse is being weaponized politically at the expense of others whom you aren’t willing to save because it would look bad for ‘your side’. If you truly care, you wouldn’t be sharing email forwards about what evil unverified unmentionable thing you read some celebrity or politician did. Instead, you’d be drawing back on your experiences as a child. Even if nothing happened directly to you, I’m sure you know some one that had an experience that forever harmed their life. Who did it? Was there a pattern or social condition that allowed for this as was laid out in the JW example? How could it have been avoided? Would you have stopped it if you saw the signs? Are you willing to stop it in the future, knowing what you know now? If you can answer any of those questions with a yes, then you have all you need to WRITE your own material to reach real victims and their families. Does your action cause problems for your ‘side’? It shouldn’t matter and you know that. If it does make a difference to you then you are no better than the shadowy pedophilic cabal that you are so obsessed with.

Throwaway because real life people know my main. I know the title sounds dramatic, but it is really how I feel and I am just trying to wrap my head around my next move.
My wife and I have been together for five years, married for almost 2. She's an amazing person- smart, funny, hardworking, and caring. Until a few years ago, I would describe our relationship as pretty much perfect. But shortly after our first anniversary, things changed.
Important context- both of us have mental health issues. For me it's more depression, for her more anxiety. I actually took off work for several years to get my depression (and associated substance use) under control, and she supported me through all of that. In fact, with her support, along with a lot of my own work, therapy, exercising, getting sober, etc, I rediscovered my passion for life and went back to school part-time. I graduate in December, at which point I hope to find work in my field. I also made a lot more friends in this program, which really further helped my self-esteem. So I have done a lot of emotional and mental growing in the last few years. While I was going to school, my wife was working-- and, in what I recognize must have been a huge weight on her shoulders, she fully financially supported the both of us. I know it is/was a lot of work, because her job pays well, but only really well (like, enough to comfortably support two people in a HCOL area) if you put in a lot of overtime/extra work (think like a sales-based position). I do feel really bad about this, and I am looking forward to making money to contribute once I get my degree, and in the meantime I focus on contributing in other ways like housework and taking care of the pets.
The problem is, while I am going through this mental growth and feel like I am in a really good place, my wife's mental health has been spiraling. Her anxiety is through the roof, she cries most nights, and she tells me she has panic attacks at work. She is seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist but I feel like nothing is changing. I have tried listening to her, suggesting she take some time off, etc., but none of that seems to help either. The spiral just continues and afterward she is just a shell of a human being. And the part that makes me feel like I "don't know her" is that when she is really anxious, she is MEAN. Like really quiet, barely answers me, gives me snippy answers when I push, and sometimes explodes for no reason. This really pushes my own buttons and it makes me feel worse, or want a drink, which I will admit pisses me off because I have done so much work to get myself in a good place. Im at a point where I feel myself distancing myself from her for my own mental health, especially as finals are going on right now.
But I was thinking the other day- with me doing so much growth, and her staying the same/backsliding…. I just miss my happy, funny wife. She has the therpy and the med dr and stuff. I always tell her I love her and try to support her when I can. At what point is it acceptable to…. Pull the plug on the relationship, or give up, because you need to protect your own health? Please be gentle in the comments, and know I feel so shitty saying this. I just need some guidance. How do I either help/support her, or let her go gently?
TLDR: Wife going through intense issues, impacting our relationship, not sure how to proceed.

TW: Anorexia, cheating, possible family of eating disorders
My friend has been trying to help Palestine in every way he can, from donating all of his money to making fliers to spread around town. However, it is beyond that.
He gets so overworked that he vomits over it, and believes entirely that he is not a good person and that he is not doing enough. Every day he sinks lower and lower, and he is not even doomscrolling tiktok, this is just his thoughts attacking him. He has panic attacks, and breakdowns, and pulls out his hair, and hits himself. He is on antidepressants and sees a therapist but I don’t feel like it is doing anything.
I am trying to be here for him the best I can, and feel a bit selfish that I cannot support him, but my mental health is also trashed. Late last year it came out that my dad had cheated on my mom multiple times, and between that my own issues about weight spiraled me into developing anorexia.
I was at the classification of overweight, and now I am pounds away from being underweight after losing more than 20% of my body weight. During this, I learned that my sister also has an eating disorder, and she looks visibly underweight. And just now recently, my mom has started to confess how she is starving herself. (She does not know about me or my sister.)
And with the cheating going on, coincidentally my mom has started to talk to her ex-boyfriend. I know it’s probably innocent, but I’m not okay.
I feel like I am going insane and I feel so guilty for not knowing how to help my friend, or my sister, or my mom. My sister is obviously needing more help than me, and I think I have just become so stressed out my mind is blank and feels nothing towards it all. I don’t know how to help him, or my family, or myself.

This is a long one, so buckle up.
Me and my boyfriend have been together around a year and a half. We are so very deeply in love, healthy, and are very physically attracted to one another. We have a healthy bedroom, good friends, and have similar viewpoints and morals. Really just the ideal relationship. Although we have not dated very long, we are aware of how strong our feelings are for each other and that we are willing to work to stay together for the long term.
When we got together, he had planned to leave the country and head to Europe, to live and work for a long time, possibly permanently. We were just supposed to be casual, but alas, here we are. He kind of messed about with leaving over the first year, not really booking anything, having loose plans of where he wanted to go, etc. meanwhile he’s actively building a life at home. We are getting serious, he’s got a job he really enjoys, his friend circle grows. But eventually, he booked his ferry, got in his van (he’s doing van life), and left the country. I was very proud, and I was excited to visit him in this new place and prepared for the inevitable long distance relationship antics.
When he first arrived, he was having a terrible time. He was home sick, just wanted to come home, felt alone, very typical response if you have just left your family, gf and friends back home and ventured out on your own. At this time, I had a flight booked to come and see him 10 days after he arrived, so it was a very short time to wait and get acquainted with his new home. In his feelings, he did state he wanted to come home and swore he didn’t want to stay in the country, I told him to stick it out and encouraged him, but I subconsciously held onto the fact that he said he would possibly like to come home at some point.
I arrived, we had a lovely holiday for around 8 days. Travelled the other countries nearby, did the typical touristy things. Then I went back home.
This is where my problem begins to bubble. You see, I have a well paying job for my age, but it’s is extremely taxing and I don’t see myself doing it for much longer (hopefully no longer than 3 years). I have good friends I see regularly, but my life at home is beginning to become monotonous and a bit stressful. Something that was prevented by having my partner here. When I had a bad day at work he was there to comfort me, if I was sore he was make me feel better, bring me tea, etc. something that I miss so much. No matter how much I fill my days off with something to do, or see my friends, I just miss him. It all just feels like filler until I see my boyfriend again.
At this exact point, my boyfriend is over his home sickness, he’s reaching out and beginning to make some friends, he’s got a new job at a small restaurant, and he’s just doing what you should at that point. I’ve been cheering him on and we have great communication (texting throughout the day, nightly FaceTimes)
Later on, he’s come home for a visit for 5 days. It’s amazing having him back. I took some days off work, we stayed away in an amazing bnb, etc. then he’s off again.
I get a bit depressed as anyone would, it’s the joys of long distance. He’s to be back at the start of June again for an event with me so we’ve got a few weeks to wait. But I’m just not in it right now. I hate my job, I’ve started the gym as some kind of outlet for any frustrations and to improve my mental health, and it seems to work.
During his last visit, and over the course of a few weeks prior, we’ve been discussing the fact that I too, want to live abroad and travel WITH him. I’m not fulfilled anymore and I’ve thought about if this is something I’m really serious about. You see, before I was 100% a homebird, I knew that living abroad in a van wasn’t for me, at least permanently. I told him this, but over the coming months I’ve changed my perspective and I’m genuinely interested in living abroad. We agreed that we would try to find an apartment, and live somewhere together with our little dog. I feel at our age we can only get our there and experience the world, even if it’s scary.
So I discussed my 5 year plan. *give a very lengthy notice for my job * whilst working, obviously actively saving as much as possible *I would give my car back to my finance company (so didn’t have such a big recurring bill) Etc etc etc
When discussing these plans, he mentioned he would probably come home after peak season (so September ish) and we could work on getting out of this country together. He also said he would probably leave again in the next summer for somewhere new, and I agreed that that is a good idea since I may not be ready to leave our home country by that time. So he still gets to travel and live abroad, and I still get to see him for the majority of the year whilst we actively work to leave the country together. This was the idea in my head.
We were just on FaceTime, so I asked “do you think you’ll be home after peak season?”
And he said “what just to visit? Or like permanently?”
I said “no like permanently”
“Um no probably not..I think I may keep travelling around after season when I can leave my job”
Oh… I was quite taken aback as this was the first he’s mentioned this. He stated valid reasons to why he wouldn’t just come back home after the season (expensive, he doesn’t feel as though he’s did enough yet, he wants to see X,Y,Z) I mentioned if he would be back before Christmas? He said he wasn’t sure. He said he’d definitely come back home before date as the vans MOT will need renewed back home so he has no choice but to come back. But besides that he just isn’t sure.
Now, this has just happened, so my emotions are a bit fresh so I apologise. I understand plans change and since there was no SET plans in place, things can change. But I feel quite hurt and upset. I believed we were on the same page, and I feel like this is almost a selfish thing to do. I don’t know if it is actually selfish or if my desperation to leave my life here + mixed with my jealousy towards the fact that he gets to live this amazing life out there, is making me resent this choice of his? I want to be with him, out there, so badly. For him to just take himself off to these other countries that I have expressed to him I REALLY want to visit, just because he doesn’t want to come back home? He’s having a great time, and I completely understand why he wouldn’t want that to end. I just feel like, why doesn’t he want to wait to be able to share that with me? Or come home to me? His dog? His family? Are we that bad?
He mentioned a country he would really like to see, that I have ALWAYS wanted to visit, and I think that was my breaking point whilst on call. He knew I was upset but I do not talk if I feel I am going to cry (working on it) so I shushed him away and said I’ll speak to him tomorrow when I’m ready.
I just need a bit of advice and clarity. What do you think you would bring up in this situation with your partner? Am I right to feel angry at him for not waiting for me? To just sacrifice a solo holiday and come home so we can plan it together? I’m just feeling so upset.
I appreciate all feedback.

I wanted to take some time to breakdown the process that I described in my earlier post (linked here).
1) Where you are - Capabilities and limitations - You need to test yourself:
You need to know where you are in relation to where you want to go. Start by building a profile for yourself. Choose relevant testing protocols pertinent to your goals (Health, Performance, Aesthetic) such as but not limited to - Athlete Profile and Goal Testing:
*Height *Weight *Resting heart rate *Heart rate variability score *VO2 Max *Anaerobic threshold *Body fat *Muscle
Strength and conditioning: *5K *10K *Squat *Deadlift *Bench
2) Where you want to go - Goals - Short term and long
Short term goals are better as process based goals mixed with weekly outcome goals-Examples: *Train x amount of minutes a day for x days per week *Strength training x amount of times per week *Cardio training x amount of times per week
Long term goals should be somewhere between 4 weeks and 16 weeks in order to give time for meaningful adaptations. *Drop x amount of pounds *Reduce resting heart rate by x beats per minute in x amount of weeks *Increase distance of run
3) Obstacles and barriers - This is your priority. The most important part of any complex system is the limiting factoweakest link. Having holes in your health and fitness is worse than having a suboptimal VO2 Max (just saying). You should be working all energy systems and all degrees of strength to some degree in some fashion. The poison is in the dose. "Fitness varies by degree not type".
It's all about energy and disrupting homeostasis in a strategic long term plan. This is where individuality becomes truly necessary and personalized. Everyone has their own limiting factors based on the following interactions and responses: These things are always changing and your body's responses will change with it.
*Activities *Stress *Nutrition *Adaptation rate *Sleep *Recovery *Fitness level and Training age *Injuries *Testing and assessment details and feedback
4) Planning and Process - Weekly progression and Methods. Choose your methods that best support your capabilities, limitations, and goals.
Capabilities and limitations: *Equipment *Time constraints *Mobility *Flexibility *Strength levels *Conditioning levels *Injuries
Easy Methods and Protocols: Strength= *Repetition Method = Submax load *Max Effort Method = Max load for reps or weight *Dynamic Effort = Submax load at maximum velocity
Prilepin's Chart
Conditioning= *Oxidative Method -Low intensity -3+ minutes to forever... -1:1 to 1:3 work to rest ratio *Phosphagen Method -High intensity -0 to 10 seconds -1:10 to 1:15 work to rest ratio *Glycolytic Method -Medium intensity -0 to 2 minutes -1:3 to 1:5 work to rest ratio
Progressions: *Volume for the first half of your program -Sets -Reps -Distance *Intensity for the second half of your program -Weight -Decrease rest times -Complexity
5) Feedback - Adjustment (Retest) Decide how you will track your goals over time. It's important that you not get caught up in following the Plan at all costs. Rarely does success happen in a linear fashion so use the feedback from your daily tracking and your periodic retesting to make adjustments to the plan.
Observe trends over time. Not single snapshots.
6) Repeat Cycle - End the cycle and start the process over again.
Life...

Posting on a throwaway bc paranoia
Me (M19) and my Fp (M20) have been in a serious romantic relationship for quite a while, we both have bpd and he’s being evaluated for possible schizophrenia, we’ve both been open about our mental health and since the beginning, we’ve been open about our mutual fps on each other and due to it, our separation anxiety. Due to recent events which I won’t go into specifics to in attempts to keep this post as short as possible, my Fp was sent to the psychward for about a week or so, he had to give up his phone just about two hours ago and I’ve been at a total loss, I don’t know what to do with myself and I can’t stop crying, I don’t know how he is, how he’s doing, what he’s doing, nothing. We are long distance due to college starting in a few months so I cannot visit him, he wrote down my number before they drove him to facility so he wouldn’t forget it but it’s likely they won’t let him call me anytime soon. I’m in contact with his mom but our conversations have been limited and I am at a total loss.
I’ve tried distracting myself but there’s nothing i can do, i have no friends to rely on, I have no enjoyment for anything anymore, watching videos and playing games leave me with nothing, I feel a sense of emptiness so deep that it’s crippling, I don’t know what to do. He’s my support system, he’s my everything and without him I have nothing and I am nothing, I have awful thoughts and memories that I try to fend away but i cannot, nothing helps and I’m hurting. I am an artist, I have art I owe that I must work on but I can’t get myself to do anything, my hands are hurting, I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t think or I think too much, I still can’t tell.
The worst part of it all is that I was forced to stop taking my medication suddenly after taking it consistently everyday since April. For some context, i started having an allergic reaction yesterday, mainly just hives, I still don’t know what from, today the hives were still here even after I spent the day yesterday taking allergy relief and lathering myself up In anti itch shit that really didn’t help much. I went to the doctor today once they started to swell, initially I suspected my medication because I didn’t eat or do anything out of the ordinary (i don’t go outside) but after being seen by the doctor and had blood taken, he ruled it out and I fainted, had a panic attack, had some stuff injected in me and all that good shit. I called my psychiatrist right afterwards for good measure and she was unable to speak with me since she was with another patient but her receptionist contacted me after speaking with her and I was informed to stop taking my medication all together until we could speak.
My next appointment was meant to be June 3rd but I am considering calling in tomorrow and arranging a sooner appointment or something because I feel like I’m losing my goddamn mind(
I just feel like I have no direction right now and I miss him so badly im hurting physically and I don’t know when illl be able to finally hear from him again, I only have him, I have no one else, if he’s gone, im done for.
TLDR; I was forced to suddenly stop taking my medication due a medical emergency and my fp is being sent to a psych ward for about a week, it’s been two hours and I can’t stop crying.

HW: 275 SW: 262 CW:252 (5’8 39 BMI)
2 questions after reading crash diet warnings.
Is this sustainable? Is losing 5 lbs a week dangerous?
I took my 3rd dose yesterday. I have lost 10 lbs. I even cheated week 1 with about 8 craft beers. I did the entire bariatric pre-op program last year. Backed out the day prior because the surgeons office seemed incompetent making several mistakes in orders. I am now in the VA MOVE program and have been referred to Bariatrics and I love the VA way more than the private providers. So while I’m still heading the bariatric route, we are trying semagutide along the way.

I have NOT had surgery but I am following a hybrid post-op program. No more alcohol. I probably drank 10-15 beers 5x a week at the pub with my friends. This cuts back 1500-2000 calories per day. Not to mention the irresponsible eating out afterwards. Spanish food, Chinese food, pizza or Taco Bell 🤦🏽‍♂️ After the alcohol I’m focused on walking a moderate 30 min and a minimum of 5000 steps 5x a week. I am doing a light full body workout, not over exerting myself, 4x a week (pushing and pulling different days). That brings me to what I am eating. 

My hybrid post op bariatric diet consists of about 1000-1200 calories with a minimum of 100 grams of protein. Average amount of complex carbs. I have and I am taking the bariatric supplements I got from the previous program. This includes bariatric calcium, Vitamin D, iron, multivitamins, etc.The semaglutide has helped curb my appetite and limit my cravings.
SUMMARY

1. MENTAL HEALTH: Eliminate toxic people and environments that do not support the weight loss. Stay away from sweets and alcohol.
2. EXERCISE: Goal of 5,000 to 10,000 steps 5x week. Weights 4x week. Leisure activity 3x week.
3. DIET: Less than 1500 calories 100 g protein.
4. SEMAGLUTIDE: w B12, Methionine, Inositol, Choline.

TLDR; apparently my bad physical and mental health synergy lead to me to a life of absolute despair, I have tried EVERYTHING for years to leave opiates but it seems lmpossible.
My name is Mac. This is originally a letter I sent to my confident so there might be some missing context, feel free to ask.
Tramadol is THE mexican opiate and works the same way, its metabolized into morphine. I have had 2 nose surgeries to improve my breathing one of them was the worst physical pain Ive felt, thats when I tried opiates.
I suffer from chronic rhinitis so my inefficient breathing often causes nightmares and physical pain. Ive gotten as much professional help as possible, both mental and physical; as well ad therapy.
I want to write this "letter" to you as a means to try to stop bitching so frequently.
In the past 2 weeks ive had nothing but suicide and despair on my mind.
Miss M. my former best friend cant help me, she has something against rivotril even when I wasnt taking any and it was prescribed by every single doctor she thoght that was the root of all my problems, she doesnt get it, other friends just say I hope you get better and pretend everythings ok.
Every morning I wake up depressed to tears thinking lifes not worth it, I have to painfully get breakfast so I can a have a handful of pills, and feel a little better when tramadol and rivotril kicks in.
My liver, stomach and guts have cronic damage from years of abuse, ive also been taking medicine for that for years, I have to follow a very restrictive diet and yet I damage my liver more with sugar addiction because extreme anxiety.
Now that im back to rivotril im a lifeless zombie, its a sedative it prevents me from getting violent and from extreme anxiety but it doesnt allways work.
I take rivotril because its by far the strongest ansiolitic drug for anxiety out here, every doctor determined no other drug worked for me as even the strongest one struggled to regulate my depression and they didnt even try to adress adhd because depression was the priority.
Once the effects of rivotril wears out in a few hours its complete hell, panic, I want to break everything, I cut myself to release endorphines and adrenalin so I can think clearly and get out of the panic mode.
And its not small cut eithers, I grab a butchers knife and start chopping I have over 50 cuts in my arm and they would be a ton more if I had less self control.
This is considering I hate and fear blood.
https://youtu.be/_Gv-7yHScco?si=No03Ge1OiV7qukrD
This short 6 min video explains what tramadol does to me, it uses fentanyl as its example but everything she says applies to tramadol.
The problem is even if tramadol helps with depression and anxiety, and makes me feel like my breathing is perfect and I have no rhinitis/allergy, its not enough because my depression and anxiety get so bad I need even more serotonin than tramadol's alone (or my receptors to work? Idk the correct terminology).
Everytime I start feeling hopeless, out of desperation I take 1 or 2 more pills of tramadol several times a day, it almost never works as my body just feels bloated but I do it everytime regardless, my liver is saturated with chemicals already.
Bupropion is the most effective SSRI ive taken by far but I can hardly afford its cost and I generated tolerance for it so quick, my depression surpasses drugs very easily when it gets bad so im trying to learn to live with that.
The video suggests treatment with 2 drugs, methadone which is ultra illegal here ane buprenorphine which my penultimate doctor scammed me, he used indiscriminately to make me a heavy opiate addict and then dissapeared charging me tons of money. The heavy buprenorphine doses made me feel like a normal person after years, I was so sure it was going to work. I even returned to my basketball team.
The doctor after that gave me insane amounts of rivotril (12mg a day) and the side effects as mentioned above were devastating and even worse with this dosage, this also lead me to take some very bad decisions.
Ive also heard about this famous naltrexone which is legal, but every single doctor refused to use that method, idk why.
After that doctor I completely left rivotril quickly, then I left bupropion and tramadol for aproximately a month, but I could not take it...
I couldnt breath, I had panic and paranoia episodes stronger than ever before, I even had very distorted visions as if I had taken psychedelics. I crawled to the drugstore for tramadol and I was ok in a matter of minutes.
Even my brain seems to have taken some sort of "loss" as for my reading comprehension is much worse, I skip words, whole paragraphs and read words that arent there at all. This could be unrelated tho.
I just want not to feel terrible and there is nothing that helps me with that, in those moments I really wanns end it all and I feel so bad for my cats who can detect my emotions, my eldest one isnt as strong anymore to take all that negative energy.
My mom is more sick than me and my dad has a terminal illness, they cant take this, my friends are not prepared to deal with major disorders + physical illness, sometimes I feel saved by you, you helped me survive another day.
I just want to die, I think about suicide everyday I truly do but my cat and mom would die too, id completely ruin their lives and I cant do that to them, hopeless doesnt beggin to describe my absolute despair.
Expensive one hour session with my therapist, as good as she is, only goes so far, 1 houweek is way too few time, and lm surprised friends cant help, I dont rely on them anymore, they have 0 comprehension and all advice/solutions that arent worth shit.
I look like a normal person and sometimes my looks are above average, its impossible for people to tell im feeling like shit and often times they dont believe me because I look fine.
I lost my sports progress, I lost my job and I lost my will to live, I have extreme apathy I just dont feel like doing anything at all.
As a final note support groups have failed me in the past, they do work momentsrily but I find as soon as the effect wears off a lot of people end up worse than before, including me.

Hello, I have recently thought that I may have mommy issues and it conflicts a lot with my attraction to women (I’m a woman). I’m not sure if I’m a lesbian, bisexual and now maybe even straight… Help me please
I don’t remember much about my childhood but my dad was pretty absent as he worked far away and I would spend entire weeks (regularly) without seeing him. My mom also studied to get a job and was generally busy. I don’t remember if she was affectionate when I was little but I know that when I was a little older (about 8-11) I avoided hugs and stuff like that, they made me uncomfortable. In conclusion, I grew up to be very independent, and the fact that I was super bullied didn’t help either. I have a lot of scars because I wasn’t valued enough in my childhood, I think.
When it comes to crushes I had a few when I was a kid, I remember Katy Perry and Ripley from Alien (yes I watched that when I was like 7), but the rest of them are “mommies” if you know what I mean. When it comes to men idk if they were really crushes because I don’t think they really had a sexual component, but I did obsess over a couple celebrities, some of whom are not conventionally attractive at all but guess what, they look like my dad. Also the only real crush on a real person I had was when I was 15 and a camp teacher, she didn’t really fit the stereotype of a mother figure but when she reassured me I would feel super attracted to her.
Flash forward, I thought I had a crush on my male best friend but turns out he was just treating me like a real friend and caring for me, and that made me obsess over him, but tbh I feel like I could never have done anything sexual with him. The worst part comes now: I had this female friend who told me she fell in love with me. At first I wasn’t in love with her, but then she started being super affectionate and I was head over heels in like a month. Our relationship totally resembled a mother figure dynamic: she always had the first say in what to do and I happily obeyed because I felt secure. She gave me a lot of affection and I was mostly just the receiver. While I was with her I was the happiest I’ve ever been, I had self esteem, my anxiety and depression disappeared, and I must say that I was fine if I couldn’t see her, but she needed to see me at least every two days. In fact we broke up because I moved and she couldn’t stand long distance. I think my relationship was codependent and also the break up has destroyed me, even though now I’m over her I still crave someone to love me that way…
So my question is, can my attraction to women be originated just from mommy issues? Also I feel like I could never be attracted to someone if they didn’t treat me this way, what can I do to heal?

Debit/Credit Cards Accepted No Closing Costs Cash Price: $1,175 Finance with $200 Down and 12 Payments of $105 Per Month No Credit Check, No Income Documentation, No Prepayment Penalty 

This is my first time posting to reddit but I hope some of you might be able to help me identify what I’m going through, because I genuinely don’t know what’s happening.
CW: eating disorders, depression, disassociation?
A little context: I’ve struggled with anorexia and bulimia for many years, but i’ve gotten a lot better over the past year. I genuinely didn’t have any thoughts regarding it until the past few weeks. Obviously relapsing is normal but this time it’s very different. Everytime I’ve struggled with this it’s been continuous and it went on for months or years on end, constantly thinking about it. But this time it’s like I’m going through very quick phases. For example, just until yesterday I went through multiple days of fasting and I cried for hours after eating a snack. But today I suddenly feel totally fine with eating and don’t feel a single negative thought about it. And this cycle has been going on for probably a month now. Like how can I go from counting every calorie and every step to totally not caring to counting every calorie again in the matter of days?
Paired with that, I go through depressive and disassociative episodes that last for about a week, in which I genuinely feel completely disconnected from everything around me and as if everything in my life, including me, was fake. Every noise sounds like a sound effect and every phrase anyone says to me sounds like a rehearsed line from a script that I’ve heard before. Kind of like a time-loop or Dejavú type thing. Again, about two days ago I called my friend and told her that I seriously don’t believe I’ll ever get rid of this feeling and that I’ll feel like this forever. Even on the call I told her that I don’t think I’m actually talking to her and that it’s all simulated. But today I felt like myself all of the sudden again and it’s like all of that never happened.
These things can even happen in the span of one day to the other, where one day I cannot even get out of bed and the next I could do 50 things all at once.
This is kinda long and I don’t expect anyone to even see this, but if you do and might have a clue on what this is… help? Thank you.

A quick and short explanation of my relationship with my boyfriend: I have known my boyfriend for over two years, we have been "officially" dating for over a year. Officially it's in brackets because we've never had a serious conversation about it, he only once said "well, I guess it's a relationship", but we behave like a couple and others perceive us that way. Over a month ago he said that he still doesn't feel anything for me, but he hopes that he will start feeling something because I am the right person for him. Then he said that maybe he had some feelings for me, but that I should give him some time because he really wanted this relationship. Surprisingly, it didn't bother me that much, except that I felt like a zombie for three days and then nothing. I feel safe and I can feel like myself and show my true self with him, we are definitely 90 percent compatible. I wanted him to be in my future.
I met his friends quite quickly, after few months, and I must admit that when his friend, let's say U came I thought in my head "I now know why he didn't show me his photo" but nothing more. Totally my type of guy. With each meeting, I started having more interactions with him e.g. I was drunk and leaned on his shoulder because he was sitting next to me, which offended my boyfriend and he felt threatened and angry and he honestly asked if I like his friend and if I would like to sleep with him, which is not true. We reconciled but he kept reminding me about it for the next 3 months. But he said he didn't fully trust his friend. It didn't bother me too much because I have no plans on sleeping with U, but I must admit that sometimes his image appeared in my head.
Recently, we went on a multi-day trip with a couple of people, and after a few small interactions me and U decided to drink much more and then we had a staring contest which consisted of sitting opposite each other 10 cm from each other's faces saying little things to each other (I like your nose, nice eyes...) and the fact that I was holding his arm, not his hand, just arm. Then U lay down and he put me down next to him so that I was practically lying on top of him and we were smoking, we blew smoke on each other's faces, all in the presence of my boyfriend and others. My bf didn't seem bothered at all, and the next day he didn't care about it either, he even joked a little about these.
The problem is that I started to wonder if I didn't like it too much all these interactions with U, talking, drinking wine or even sitting next to him. I started thinking about U a little more. He's a good looking guy, with a sense of style and intriguing behavior. I wonder what is happening in my head. I like my boyfriend, I think I feel something for him and I would never cheat on him, but I also feel that he won't feel anything for me. I feel very guilty because I wouldn't want him to think that way about someone.
Maybe I'm just a bad person although in my previous relationship I didn't even think about anyone other than my ex for a moment so maybe that's a sign that it's not it. On the one hand, I feel bad, but on the other, my boyfriend admits that he doesn't feel anything for me yet.
Now the question is whether my little fascination with his friend shows that this is not a relationship for me? And is there any way to save this situation? How

I’m 28 my brother is 22 I used to beat him easily in 1v1 everytime I’m pretty good don’t wanna boost or anything I’m sure a lot of ppl here are better but he has a family gene and is now 6’2 a big I’m only 5’9 so a couple months ago he beat me 11-3 I was like there’s no shot he’s just to tall. But I started training because I wanted to play in the summer league at the rec center in my town. So on Mother’s Day the time presented itself. This time was much different it started out as a back and forth of course I can’t stop everything but my footwork and finesse with the basketball kept me in the game. Normally I’d get tired and start calling 2s but I never settled so mid way I could tell he was getting worn down absolutely gassed went into the house for water sitting down and I’m just unphased ready to go. It’s 10-8 my lead at this point: he comes back in the game I give him a little space because if I get best off one foot he’s got a lay up line so he tied it. Hoping I would to for 2 and the win back I didn’t I just continued to play bully ball the more you wear on your opponent the easier it is back down back down fake up and under bucket 11-10. So he comes back down I see ball I see man can’t pick him up at the high post poking the ball away multiple times he’s exhausted at this point I get the stop finally. I come back down same thing to his credit he gets the stop. At this point he’s entirely gassed and has no option to go for 2 so I step up a bit more and then box out it missed the whole rim so just lay it in and that’s game, was a hell of a game didn’t know my stamina and strength was that high. I didn’t really feel worn out much at all I was sweating of course but the next day I’m sore as shit guarding a big man is no joke plus there was no real ref so I was getting elbowed hit in all areas but never went away. Shit was competitive as fuck I can’t wait for the league to start so we can run real plays pick and rolls all game that’s my favorite offense shooting a bunch of 3s just lets your opponents miss and if your only making like 1. Out of 4 I can live with that. I’d rather attack like a slasher type and just wear my opponent down. For reference I’m 5’9 about 197 and he’s 6’2 225 so yeah. It’s does definitely sting the day after

CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
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Urgent Help Needed: Support Khaled and Sohaila's Escape from Gaza

Hello friends,
My name is Khaled, and my fiancé Sohaila and I are reaching out to you in our most desperate time of need. I am 29 years old, and Sohaila is 25. As you may know, Gaza is currently embroiled in a devastating war, and the situation here is beyond dire. The constant threat of violence, lack of basic necessities, and the relentless fear for our lives have made it impossible to continue living here safely. We are seeking your help to not only survive this catastrophe but also to find a way out to a safer place where we can rebuild our lives.

Why We Need Your Help

1. Life-Threatening Conditions: The conflict has intensified, and the bombings and airstrikes have become a daily occurrence. Our home is no longer safe, and every moment is filled with uncertainty and fear. We urgently need funds to secure safe shelter and basic necessities like food, clean water, and medical supplies.
   
2. Healthcare Access: The healthcare system in Gaza is overwhelmed and on the brink of collapse. With hospitals being targeted and medical supplies running out, accessing even the most basic healthcare is a challenge. We need financial support to access emergency medical care and medications.
   
3. Evacuation Costs: Escaping from Gaza is an incredibly challenging and costly endeavor. The current evacuation cost set by the authorities is $5,000 per person. This amount covers safe passage out of the war zone, including transport and necessary travel documents. These costs are far beyond what we can afford on our own, totaling $10,000 for both of us.
   
4. Rebuilding Our Lives: Once we manage to leave, we will need to start from scratch in a new country. This includes finding a place to live, securing employment, and integrating into a new community. Your support will give us the foundation we need to start a new chapter in our lives safely and securely.
   
5. Our Background and Struggles: Before the war escalated, I was a day-to-day worker in Gaza, doing my best to provide for us. I was in the process of building a small house for our future together. Sohaila was a dedicated children's teacher, passionate about educating and caring for her students. Despite working more than 110 hours per week together, we both earned less than the minimum wage. Our combined income barely covered our living expenses. Now, with the war, our situation has become even more desperate. We have lost our small house and are now living in a tent.
   

We are humbly asking for your help in this critical time. Every donation, no matter how small, can make a significant difference in our ability to survive and find safety. Your generosity will not only help us escape immediate danger but will also give us a chance to rebuild our lives and hope for a better future.
Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your kindness and support.
Sincerely,
Khaled and Sohaila
My gofundme link

Hi, I didn't get a lot of interaction on my last post, but I guess someone was concerned about me enough to contact Reddit Support, so I decided to post an update.
It's going on 4 years of NC with my[25F] mom[47F], with the exception of family events where I am forced to see her. My mental health really improved after I stopped interacting with her, though I do get fairly stressed when I have to see her at family events.
This is mainly concerning an incident this past weekend. I was at a friend's party when my sister '22F' called me, telling me that my mother was concerned about my other sister '20F' not being home and having heard gunshots outside. For context, the sister that called me lives in California, and I live in Chicago, and so do my mom and youngest sister. I immediately panicked, calling my youngest sister repeatedly, thinking the worst, having a panic attack in front of several friends and my boyfriend, who expressed severe concern for me.
I eventually made contact, and she informed me that she was at a late running dance practice. My mind immediately knew this was true, since my sister was consistently either at work, home, dance practice, or school. As soon as the relief wore off, I got angry at both my mother and my sister that had called me.
Despite knowing that my mother had a history of blowing things out of proportion, I still allowed myself to get drawn into her needless panic, even after my boyfriend told me that there were no reports of gunshots in the area where my sister and mom lived.
When I woke up the next morning, my sister had messaged me to tell me that I shouldn't be contacting her friends to find her if I couldn't get in contact with her. This was the straw that broke the camels back, and I unblocked my mother to berate her for kicking up a fuss just because my ADULT sister didn't see it as necessary to keep her updated on her location.
I'm currently taking a step back from my sisters, but I really don't know how to move forward, since it seems like my sisters will just keep drawing me back into any drama my mom causes.
TLDR: My '25F' Mom '47F' overreacted to my sister '20F' not updating her on her location, causing my sister '22F' in California to call me, causing me to have a panic attack

Guys I have dreamt twice today straight.. please someone help me I'm not fluent in english First dream I forgot about the first dream but I still remember the last part where the demon was attacking my sister face and eating it. I tried my best to grap the demon head away from her face ( I can't touch the demon) I felt pain, sad, angry, powerless. When I know I can touch the demon's hair somehow, i tried to my best to pull but the other demons where stalling me idk I can't use my hand so I bit his hair with my teeth. I still can't save my sister, the demon after eating my sister's face. He fly off infront of me a little far not too close and told me he will search for me. Then I woke up.
Second dream. The dream started at a school. (It wasn't a school but a neighbouring place in real life(family property farm)) idk why. My middle school teachers were there(only 2).me and my bestfriend Our exam result for eng were out and our eng teach teach some lessons on my English class after this idk how our Hindi teacher came but in his class i always tried to close window because I felt uncomfortable I was sitting at the last bench corner. The window locker was loose I can't close the window. I think it started raining after that the school janitor came helping me to close the door from outside and it suceeds.we didn't did the class for Hindi. My bestfriend went out of the class first then me. When I go out of the class my bestfriend were infront me telling me he forgot his notes for formula. I told him the Hindi teacher were off felts some unpleasant aura from him. I visualised out of nowhere where the Hindi teacher was alone in the class with the farm. After my bestfriend told me his father will be waiting there so I told let's go together there. Out of nowhere we were riding a bike. When we were driving my bestfriend who was driving fell off the bike. We ride the bike again idk who drove this time after I ask him are you fine. This time met the Hindi teacher in a park where he was talking about curses and blackmagic about cursing people. JUST AFTER THAT WE WAS in accident where my friend head buump vertically directly in the wet soil grasss grasss.after that I think water was in stomach I felt powerless then I remembered (I once save my sister by hand cpr on stomach or heart idk it was a realife event) I did that to my bestfriend he vomited water I think. I thought I save him. Then I ask his father's no. He gave 3 digits no. I think. Now I know that he's adopted (ACTUALLY HE ISN'T ADOPTED). I felt sad 😢 why he wouldn't tell me while he did to other. We could have adopted him. He died after 1month in the dream. Then I woke up I guess.
I have never dreamt like this please someone help me