Keep in mind all of this came with the Knicks up 3-2 in the playoffs, about to win the series. Brunson putting up stats nobody but MJ and the big O have put up. Maybe we can have a doomer game thread and a reasonable person game thread to keep these fools from ruining the discourse? I really don’t know if these posters are actually Knicks fans or if it was Sixers fans all trolling. It’s like these people don’t realize that basketball is a game of runs and comebacks happen and fake comebacks happen all the time.
I really want to know why Knicks “fans” would say things like this during what turned out to be one of the best victories in a long time.
We're done. Embarrassing performance”
“fuck this sorry ass team”
“We are experiencing back to back epic meltdowns. This offense is absolutely putrid and Thibs has no idea what the fuck to do.”
“This is a weak mental team”
“literally no killer instinct. sixers in seven”
“Game over going to see you guys at game 7”
“Loser ass team. Fuck this”
“two things are sure in life, lolmets and lolknicks”
“Thibs getting out coached for the 3rd consecutive playoffs. Shit on me for this if you want, but you know its true”
“He is a horrible coach in the playoffs just look at his record”
“Game is over. This team blows dick.”
“Bunch of choker losers. The lights are too bright for this team”
“This is fucking pathetic. 2 seed blowing a 3-1 lead after being up 6 points with 30 seconds left in Game 7 to the single worst playoff performing team of the last 7 years. A franchise synonymous with choking, and we're making them look like the fucking prime Spurs! A new low for this franchise”
“said it 59 times. they are never recovering from game 5. they could be up 30 with 4 minutes left and still lose. it's not a skill thing it's a psychological imposter syndrome”
“yup, that was all i needed to see this series is over i'm not watching this sorry ass performance.”
“people really think the 20 point implosion is an accident or some freak occurrence or because we don't have scorers. (we had to go up 20 in the first place lol) i don't think they can mentally recover from what they did game 5. probably felt like imposters toniaht being up 20. I actually thinkMaxey won the serie game 5.”
“that's what I said. Blowing that game was the beginning of the end, it will just take people time to see it.”
“No lead is safe for this dumbass team. What a fucking embarrassment.”
“40 million and can't finish a dunk. such my dick”
The ultimate choke artists. Allowing buddy hield 17 points.throwing away a huge first quarter lead. We're cooked”
“This is obviously going to a game 7 and I don't s V how anyone can feel confident about it. Idc if it's at MSG”
“Series over and it's all on the Knicks not the refs”
“If the Knicks don't win this series, Brunson as a number one option is seriously questionable”
“this is a choke team IMO. they don't have the killer instinct to actually put a team away. it's an intangible”
“You can't blow a series this bad and not fire a coach”
“This franchise is fucking pathetic. 25 years of shooting themselves in the dick.”
“OG you absolute fucking bum”
“Why not pull Brunson and rest for game 7 at this point?”
“This is why Thibs will never win... he's a regular season coach”
“series over”
“we're a bunch of frauds. we dont belong in the ? seed or in the playoffs”
“they are never recovering from what Maxey did to them game 5. that is why they are imploding . they would of been up 40 and did the same thing. the score doesn't actually matter. it's a psychological thing and a killer instinct thing. they will find a way to lose game 7 at the garden too.”
“Hart is genuinely playing bad chill the fuck out”
“Thibs getting out coached yet again. Can't make an adjustment to save his life”
“They're gonna get their shit run in a game 7. This team sucks dick”
“this roster has choking within them. ive never seen something like game 5 and here we are again. absolutely no resiliency. brunson couldn't put the team on his back while we were being outscored by 25 there? OG looks like he doesn't know where he is. IHART and mitch look fucking lost. Bunch of bums”
“We're not winning this game. On to game 7, l guess.”
“Fuckin bums”
“i'm done. good night im not watching a team that has actively given up”
“They're failing us man. Again.”
“I'm done bro.... Awful offense and awful defense”
“im rooting for the knicks to lose now. l've seen enough. This team doesn't have it”
“This is actually fucking stupid like what's the fucking point of being a fan if we've been ass my entire life and the one time we're actually good we pull this shit. And I'm fucking 30 years old Imfao”
“What a bunch of god damn choke artists”
“We're gonna lose by 40 at this rate. We literally cannot make a shot. This sorry ass franchise is gonna beat us again”
“Anyone who's been a Knicks fan for more than 1 year knew this series was over the second they lost game 5”
“The series was over when the lost the other night, just a matter of watching it play out now.”
“Saturday will be a funeral at the garden”
“Knicks just look lost. I don't see them turning it around tonight. Every other game they played with energy and purpose when down, but they just look stagnant.”
“All time choke job.”
“Knicks bout to blow a 3-1 lead, actually bums, we was up 6 points last game, should've closed it out”
“Had them put away in the first, all they had to do was keep their composure and not shit their pants, but here we are after the entire team suffering from explosive diarrhea in the 2nd qtr. This team might be cooked and I'm so fucking mad how this is looking like it will end. I don't give a fuck about what happened in the regular season, what was overcome, how good Jalen was, YOU ALL FUCKING CHOKED THIS SERIES AWAY!!!!!”
“At least we know these fucks deserve to lose now”
“This team just is Brunson and a bunch of talentless hacks that make up for their talent defiency by out hustling people When you're in the playoffs, and facing a team that's going hustle just as much as we do we can't win. That's why we can't dominate the boards. That's why we get a 1 v1 every fast break that our inferior talent can't win It's a cute story but it's probably the least talented team to ever finish top 2 in their conference”
“Watched the Knicks choke away the best shot to make the eastern conference finals bro im sick Iman”
“bunch of chokers playing petrified when it matters”
McBride and Robinson are literally useless”
“no chance we pull this out”
“This team blows”
“We deserved to lose this shit. This is an unbelievable choke job. To blow a 22 point lead in an elimination game like this is is pathetic”
“Why should we resign og ? Mans is not producing the equivalent of the money he's expecting”
“do we really wanna be paying og all tgat money for this performance? god awful”
“brunson disappears when we need a bucket. when we need the bleeding to stop he passes the ball and doesn't look to score”
“Cool more missed free throws Jalen, nice job "mvp"”
“Players are right thibs ain't shit”

I just wanted to share my story in hopes that it will help someone else because others stories have helped me. Tl:dr version is that pro biotics literally saved my life after a ten year wide spread candida infection.
My symptoms started after giving birth to my second child ten years ago. I had awful morning sickness with her that never went away. I was diagnosed with auto immune type 1 diabetes three years before this. When I complained about the constant nausea my doctor said it was probably something called gastroparesis which is literally a paralyzed stomach as a complication from diabetes. At that point I had excellent control of my blood sugars but believed my doctor because type 1 diabetes is extremely hard on the body, especially during pregnancy/nursing. They gave me multiple Botox injections into the pylori of my stomach with no help in symptoms. My doctor always shrugged his shoulders, blaming my diabetes and suggested a pace maker for my stomach. I’m so glad I declined but he wasn’t and sent me on my way saying he couldn’t help me.
Over the years my symptoms got worse. The constant nausea was so debilitating I could barely function or stand up straight. I couldn’t sleep, my memory was awful, I was experiencing a ton of OCD and ADHD symptoms, itchy skin, constant vaginal yeast infections, insomnia, no sex drive, no appetite, couldn’t eat more than a few bites of food at a time, gagging, bloating, body aches especially in my legs, constant sinus issues, facial swelling, blurry vision… you name it! I want to stress though that my absolute worst symptom and what i focused on the most was the nausea. I was so depressed and cried constantly. I wasn’t living, I was surviving.
I spent hundreds of hours researching what could be wrong with me online and came across candida a few times. I suggested it to multiple different doctors over the years and was all but laughed at each time. Absolutely every symptom I had was blamed on my diabetes and I was thrown multiple antidepressants, motility, pain and nausea prescriptions to deal with them. The thing is the medications just made me worse. After ten years I was starting to wonder if this was all in my head which just made me feel even worse because how could I possibly be doing this to myself? I was so depressed and absolutely hopeless.
The beginning of the end started about 2 years ago. My sinuses were really bothering me. Super congested, constantly draining and needing to blow my nose, super itchy nose too. I was going insane. My doctor prescribed a round of anti biotics and everything went to hell. ALL of my symptoms got worse. For months I would beg my doctor for help and she would throw more antibiotics at me and promise none of my plethora of symptoms were anything other than diabetes related. About 8 months ago I was in for a check up and she found oral thrush and seemed genuinely shocked. Again she blamed my diabetes and prescribed nystatin. I couldn’t take it as prescribed because I couldn’t stop vomiting but this just irritated my doctor more and made it seem like it was my fault I wasn’t getting better.
About 8 weeks ago all of my symptoms intensified more when I didn’t think it was possible. I was so incredibly nauseous that I was wasting away weight wise and just cried 24/7. My insomnia was awful and I was just so miserable I was seriously considering ending it all. Every minute was pure torture and not sleeping made it so much worse. I couldn’t live like this anymore. I made one last appointment with my doctor where I brought up candida again. She basically laughed and told me there was no way yeast was anywhere but my mouth. It was “impossible” to get in my sinuses or cause any of my other symptoms. Why can’t I understand that it’s just part of my diabetes?! I left that appointment fully prepared to give up that night.
Out of sheer desperation and intense love for my children and husband, I found this Reddit page and decided to try a pro biotic. The first 12 days were the worst of my entire life! I must have had horrible die off because I was sicker than I have ever been and Ive been in the icu multiple times from acidic blood due to diabetic keto acidosis and this was very similar. Sweating, chills, low grade fever, horrible insomnia, racing heart, low blood pressure, intense lower back pain, diarrhea, restless but super fatigued, no motivation, diarrhea, gas … I honestly thought that I was dying especially at night when all of these symptoms intensified. I almost went to the er a few times mainly because of my racing heart. I realized these were die off symptoms so I continued with the probiotics.
I’m so happy to say that for the last two weeks I have been feeling AMAZING!! For the first time in ten years I am NOT nauseous! Absolutely every single one of my symptoms cleared up. Even ones I didn’t think were related or even an issue at all like my sexual health. This may be tmi but my labido and orgasms are a million times better! I am absolutely amazed at how much better I feel overall. Mentally, psychically, emotionally, sexually, even spiritually. I am just a completely different person and have actually cried tears of joy multiple times this past week, as corny as that sounds.
I just really wanted to share my story in hopes that it might help someone else because this Reddit page literally saved my life! I’m not sure why doctors are so against candida being a thing when it was so clear in my case what the issue was. Or why they’re against natural remedies before throwing prescriptions with awful side effects at people like its candy. Not one doctor suggested a pro biotic. Not even the several different GI specialist I seen throughout the years. If it wasn’t for the thrush I don’t know if I ever would have figured this out because it was a great visual of my overall health. The worse my tongue was the worse I felt. The better I got the better my tongue got. So silly but so obviously a yeast issue. I have massive ptsd and distrust of the medical community now but I guess that’s to be expected and I can only work on that now.
Again, thank you everyone ❤️

During the existence of Unit 731, the Japanese doctors performed experiments on thousands of people and may have ultimately killed up to 300,000 or 400,000 in the surrounding areas and in their labs. They dissected many alive, including infants and pregnant women, and also injected them with biological weapons agents or other pathogens.
My mother had been one of the rare survivors, a witness to the horrors of those events. She had lived in a town about fifty miles from Manchukuo, the base for Unit 731. She remembered the date when the soldiers and doctors entered her life and took away everything she knew and loved: September 1st, 1942. This was the account of those hellish events she told me before she died.
***
The ceramic bomb fell slowly from the sky, spinning in lazy circles before righting itself and coming straight down towards our town.
A single white plane with the symbol of the rising sun whined past the center of town, flying away like a criminal running away from the scene of a crime. A couple merchants came out of their shops, looking up into the sky with suspicion and fear.
I saw the bomb hit the yard behind my neighbor’s home. It shattered into millions of pieces, a sound like smashing glass shattering the silence.
I was very small at the time, only five or six-years-old. I ran inside to tell my mother. I saw her standing behind the fireplace, cooking a small batch of tea, waiting for my father to come home.
“Mother, a Japanese plane just flew over the town, and it dropped a bomb! But it looked like it was ceramic, and it didn’t even blow up. Why do you think they did this?” My mother’s face paled visibly.
“Stay inside,” she ordered me, turning to look out the window, her eyes filled with fear and anxiety as she continuously looked for my father’s silhouette on the trail leading up to the front door. “Where is your father? I wish he was here with us.” She poured herself a cup of plain green tea, sipping the steaming hot beverage and refusing to meet my gaze. She just continued to watch the road, and it was then the first pangs started- a sense of wrongness and foreboding filling my mind.
***
My mother and I stayed inside the rest of the day, waiting for my father. She grew increasingly worried as the hours passed, but she wouldn’t allow me to go outside to look for him. I ended up sitting next to my mother and pouring myself a cup of tea. She grabbed my hand suddenly, squeezing it tight and looking me in the face for the first time.
“Something bad is going to happen, I think,” she said. “Or maybe it’s happening already. No matter what, I want you to know I love you. I love you as only a mother can love her only child.” These words only increased my sense of dread, and I didn’t know what to say. My eyes watered, and I felt like I might start crying. My mother had never been so explicitly and openly emotional like this before.
“I love you too, you know that,” I said, trying to force a smile. My mother didn’t return it. She just went back to staring outside at the dying day.
Finally, around dark, my father came running up to the house, his face covered in sweat. He flung the door open, running right past me without even looking at me.
“We need to leave the town immediately,” he said to my mother, tears streaming down his face. “I think it’s too late, but we need to try.”
“What’s wrong?” my mother asked. “Did you see what the Japanese left us?” My father shook his head, closing his eyes.
“The neighbors and I went to look at the so-called ‘bomb’ that dropped from the sky,” he said, his voice quickening and rising as he spoke. “What we found…”
“Why would you go out there?” my mother asked. My father continued to keep his eyes closed, refusing to meet her gaze.
“We found dead fleas inside a massive shattered ceramic shell,” he said. “Thousands of them, some smashed flat from the impact. And all around the area, tens of thousands of live ones, very active. They were jumping around like crazy. I got bit quite a few times.” He paused for a long moment, his face still troubled and pale. I stood up and started laughing.
“Fleas? Father, why would you be scared of fleas?” I asked. “That’s much better than them dropping a real bomb! We’ve had flea bites before. That’s not such a horrible thing, is it?” My mother and him looked scared, but I couldn’t figure out why.
We fled that night, packing our bags within minutes. We went to the next town over and stayed with my mother’s parents. But after a few days passed, our family discovered we hadn’t gone nearly far enough.
***
My grandmother came in on the third day after what I jokingly called the “flea bomb attack”, holding a basket of goods from the local market. She complained that her head was pounding and her stomach hurt. My mother felt her forehead, exclaiming that my grandmother had a high fever.
“Oh, I’m sure it’s nothing,” my grandmother responded, flipping a hand as if she were shooing away a fly. “Probably just something I ate. I’ve survived much worse than a little stomach ache, I can tell you that.” She winked at me, showing off her toothless gums as she smiled.
Within hours of her falling ill, countless others began showing symptoms. Like falling dominoes, the sickness spread through the entire village, swarming the countryside with its black, fetid rot. It started with headaches, stomach pains, fever, diarrhea, chills and sweating. At first, it looked like the flu, or sometimes just a bad cold.
The moment we saw the swollen, black sore on my grandmother’s neck, we knew it was something far worse. She collapsed in the kitchen later that night while trying to sip water, and my mother and I carried her unconscious body over to her bed. She was covered in sweat, coughing up blood, her skin turning black as the swollen sores spread throughout her flesh. It seemed like the buboes on her neck, armpits and groin swelled before my eyes, massive amounts of pus slowly leaking out of tiny holes all over the wounds. The tip of her nose had started to turn black with dark, sickly purplish splotches all around it. We all knew she would not survive for much longer.
I went to my grandmother with a cool cloth. She looked up at me with glistening, tear-streaked eyes, confused and rambling.
“Oh, is it time for the harvest already?” she said. “I thought it already came.”
“Grandma… it’s me, Jing,” I said.
“Jing?” she said, squinting her eyes. I saw a trickle of blood running down from one nostril. Taking the cloth, I started to wipe it up, but then she started coughing, bending over double. After a few hacking coughs, she spewed out a trickle of dark, thick blood, spitting it onto the covers. “I’m sorry, mother, I forgot to tell father about the lamp oil.”
She looked above me, staring at something only she could see. She began to cry. As she turned her neck to the side, the swollen, pus-filled bubo burst, the black skin rupturing as dark, stinking fluid spewed forth.
“Mother! Please, it’s me. Take me home,” she said, continuing to ramble, staring around the room at people only she could see. I turned and ran, unable to take anymore of it.
My grandfather had complained of headaches and chills earlier in the day. A few hours after my grandmother, he also collapsed. We found him laying on the threshold of the open door, groaning and moving his arms, reaching out as if for someone to pick him back up. Huge swollen pustules shone from under his armpits and from the sides of his neck. We put him in another bed. He also quickly became delirious, talking to people who weren’t there. As the sun set, I knew they would not survive long.
Things had gone from bad to worse when I looked out the window into the night beyond and saw the first Japanese soldiers coming, dressed in white biohazard suits and gas masks that covered every inch of their skin.
***
I heard knocking on the neighbor’s door, hard and insistent. I moved the curtain away from the window, peering out, my small heart beating fast. Everyone in the house besides myself was, by that time, showing symptoms of what we then knew without a doubt to be the Black Death.
We had heard countless horror stories of the Black Death. With up to seventy percent of people dying in some areas, it was one of the most feared and horrifying diseases imaginable. Most of the townspeople would have fled that night if they hadn’t been vomiting blood as their skin turned black.
My mother ran over to me, her face pale and sweaty. She wavered on her feet, looking like she might collapse. Then she took a deep breath, closing her eyes and bracing herself. When she looked stable again, she knelt close to me.
“The enemy is outside,” she whispered. “We must hide you.” I nodded silently. I heard shouting coming from next door. Behind the curtain, I caught glimpses of dozens of men in clean, white biohazard suits and gas masks walking calmly and confidently onto our road. After another few seconds, a hard knock sounded at our front door.
“Quick!” my mother said, pushing me across the kitchen and towards the oven in the corner. We had a large, metal oven back then in addition to the fireplace. Due to my father’s position, we were better off than most of the people in our town. Some still lived in cold, unheated shacks and ate rice and water for every meal.
The oven had a flat top grill and, of course, used firewood, seeing as this was back in 1941. We didn’t have electricity in my parent’s home, and neither did my grandparent’s. As far as I know, in fact, no house in the area had electricity.
She opened the door. The cold interior of the oven had ashes and small pieces of twigs forming a uniform carpet. I sneezed as the cloud of debris swirled around us.
“No time for that!” my mother hissed as I coughed and choked. “Get inside, child! Now!” Without thinking, I began to crawl through the tiny door. I could barely fit inside the oven. She closed the door all the way, locking me in the cramped darkness. Curled into a ball, I felt like a fetus imprisoned in an iron womb.
A final, bone-rattling pounding on the door started. I heard my mother’s footsteps as she rushed away from me. A moment later, I heard the door creak open.
“Come, come,” Japanese soldiers said in broken Chinese. “You come now.”
As a child, I was extremely bright. Even as a young girl, my vocabulary was well beyond anyone else in my grade. I had also picked up some Japanese, since we were near the puppet state of Manchuria, a vassal of the Imperial Japanese Empire during World War 2.
So when the Japanese had finished clearing out the house and stood talking to each other, I understood bits and pieces.
“What do we do with these logs?” one asked. I felt confused. What logs?
“These ones, maybe…” I didn’t understand everything he said after that, but he kept saying the word “fire”.
Later on, I would find out that the Japanese always referred to human experimentation victims as “logs” to help dehumanize them, to make it easier to burn or dissect them alive, or to inject them with horrifying biological and chemical weapons agents.
As the last of Japanese left the home, I felt sick to my stomach. Curled inside in the oven in the fetal position, I began to cry, giving up all hope that things would turn out OK.
**
Things quickly went from bad to worse when I tried to leave the oven and found the door had latched closed. I was in total darkness inside the oven and barely had room to move. A sense of suffocation began to come over me, a feeling of being buried alive.
At first, I whimpered as I kicked against the door with whatever force I could muster. It didn’t even seem to shake in its frame. I increasingly became panicked, kicking and punching at it. Then I started to scream for help.
“Hello?” I yelled. “I’m stuck! Is anyone out there! Please let me out!” I don’t know how long this went on for, but it seemed eternal.
Suddenly, in the midst of my yelling and kicking, the door flew open and light flooded my eyes. I fell out, gasping as tears streamed down my face. I looked up, expecting to see my mother, or maybe a Japanese soldier, but it was neither.
Three gaunt Chinese faces looked down at me, men with guns in torn, dirty clothes. I gaped at them, wondering if they were here to kidnap or murder me.
“It’s OK, little girl,” one said to me, kneeling down and brushing my ash-streaked hair out of my face. “We’re partisans. We were on our way to attack the Imperial Japanese and put a stop to their monstrous actions.”
“Where’s your family?” another one asked. I looked up at him, seeing he only had one working eye. From it gleamed compassion and understanding. The other was blinded, covered in a cataract, as white and dead as a corpse.
“They took them!” I said, crying harder. “They made us sick and then they took them away.”
“What’s your name?” the one-eyed soldier asked.
“It’s Jing,” I said.
“Well, Jing, my name is Chen. This is my group. We are meeting up with other partisans in the area, armed men who will protect you. You’re safe now.”
“No, no, we’re not!” I said. “Just listen…” And as Chen and I stood in the dark kitchen of an empty town, I told him everything that had happened since I first saw the ceramic bomb falling from the sky.
***
The soldiers did not look happy when I told them about the fleas and what happened. The two behind Chen had panic in their eyes as I finished the story.
“Chen, this means we may all be exposed to this disease now!” one said, sweating heavily, his greasy hair sticking up all over his head. Chen did not seem distressed. He looked like the calm eye of the hurricane in the midst of panic.
“Whether we were exposed or not,” Chen said, “this changes nothing. We will continue with our mission. In fact, this only makes it more pressing. We know where the Japanese took the townspeople. We must put a stop to it.” I agreed with Chen, mostly because I hoped they would save my family, especially my mother. I figured it was probably too late for my grandmother and grandfather. A sharp pang of sadness pierced me as I thought about them dying from the plague in some freezing cell, alone and delirious.
With my head down, deep in thought, I followed them out into the night.
I saw strange fluids littering the roads under the moonlight, dark patches of what looked like blood intermittently marring the dirt road. They were still wet, contrasting with the bone-dry conditions outside.
We left the town, and I followed them down another dirt road. After about an hour of hiking, we came upon it.
From the distance, I saw a massive building. It looked rather nice from the outside, and even had a balcony hanging over the front door. Every window had bright light coming out.
“It looks like someone might be home,” I whispered to Chen. I had walked next to him the entire way. We hadn’t talked, as he was afraid of making too much noise.
“Regardless, we’re going in,” he said quietly, looking around for something.
A few twigs cracked and more partisans came walking out of the woods, saluting Chen. Now the entire group of partisans was up to seven.
“OK, let’s do it,” he said with fury on his face, the desire for bloodshed stamped into every word. “According to our plan, as much as possible. Don’t let a single Japanese doctor or soldier survive.” The rest of them nodded, and without another word, they began sprinting towards the building, some moving towards the front while others veered off around the back of the building.
Chen turned to me.
“I have to go in too,” he said sadly, kneeling down before me. “Will you be alright out here by yourself?” I felt shocked.
“I want to go help rescue my ma!” I responded. “They took everyone from me. I should be involved too.”
“You’re just a little kid who can’t use a gun,” Chen said reassuringly. “Just stay out here. And if I don’t come back within thirty minutes, get out of here. Go find some family you can contact- anyone at all, a cousin or an uncle. Get away from here. This place is poisoned.” He rose, turning. With a last glance around the open field leading to the Unit 731 building, he broke out of the cover of the trees and began running.
***
Gunfire erupted from inside the building, shattering the calming nighttime ambience. I saw flashes of light erupting out of the windows. It wasn’t contained in one spot, but rather seemed spread throughout the building. First there would be a long, sustained fire from the front of the first floor, then seconds later, another burst from the side of the third floor.
And then everything went deathly silent. A man ran out of the front of the building, one of the Chinese partisans. He had lost his gun somewhere and stood, covered in blood, his left arm ripped off at the shoulder, spurting great, arterial streams out of his body. He tripped over his own foot, tangling his legs together, and landed hard on the wound. Crying and choking, he called for help. No one came.
Seconds later, he stopped moving, dying on the ground in front of my eyes.
I decided I should go in. I remembered what Chen told me, but I decided he was wrong. This was my family, after all, not his.
As quietly as possible, I sprinted past the dead partisan and into the open front door. Bright lights shone all down the hallway, illuminating the gore and splattered blood along the white walls and polished floors. A dismembered arm with its finger still around the trigger lay at the side, discarded like trash. Without another thought, I shook the limb loose and lifted the gun up.
Now I would do it, I thought to myself. Now I was just like them. I had a gun, and I was here to save my mother. Nothing would stop me.
I spun around, deciding to go deeper into the building, when something stopped me.
Chen stood there around the next corner, leaning against the wall and bleeding heavily. His scalp looked ripped open, his face a mask of gore. I looked down at his chest, realizing I could see the organs inside. His intestines looked like deep-red worms trying to slip out of the ground. He had one hand on the area, trying to keep his organs inside.
“You…” he said, breathing hard, “need to run.” He stumbled, falling to his knees, putting his hand out towards me. “Get out of here, now. They’re all dead. I found no one…” He fell face-first on the ground, a spreading pool of blood forming around his body.
I walked past him, not believing. I found a stairwell, deciding I should start with the basement.
I looked in the first room, seeing stainless tables side by side. On each lay a body. Some were pregnant women, their faces twisted in agony, their stomachs cut open. Fetuses and babies lay next to their mothers, also dissected.
Against the back wall, I saw entire babies preserved in glass jars filled with liquids. Next to them, I saw human heads, hearts, livers and intestines.
In disgust, I left, going to the next room. In this one, I saw dozens of burn victims, their bodies blackened into a crisp, some of them also dissected. As I walked past, one of them began breathing, moaning something incomprehensible. I saw fire-blackened fingers twitch as the person tried to raise their hand towards me. Chen had been wrong. Someone was alive.
Then I heard the deep, guttural breathing from the hallway behind me. With my heart racing, I turned, raising the gun.
An abomination stood there, something from the depths of Hell. Sewn together from many body parts, it had five legs, the stitches black and ugly against its naked skin. It towered over me, its heads scraping the ceiling.
I saw the ten arms sewn onto its long, snake-like chest flexing and clenching. From many of the stitch wounds connecting the limbs to the body, a dark, sickly-smelling fluid dripped down. It had three heads on the top, all mutilated, their cheeks sliced open, showing the grinning teeth below. I saw animal and reptilian eyes staring out from the heads, implanted next to human eyes.
After a moment of shock, I pulled the trigger. The recoil from the gun was far stronger than I expected, but since the creature was so tall, I still ended up hitting it in the shoulder.
It shrieked as black blood began to run down its pale skin, its voices rising together in outrage and pain, its many legs starting to move and scuttle forwards.
I turned and immediately fell over the body of a Japanese soldier, still dressed in a white biohazard suit. I felt the creature’s fingers closing around my ankle when someone yelled from behind me.
“Hey, you!” a woman cried loudly. A burst of gunfire rang out.
Turning in surprise, I saw my mother, standing there with a stolen gun from a Japanese soldier. She had sores from the Black Death all over her skin, and her nose had turned dark from the necrosis. She stumbled forwards, firing as she went until the gun ran out of bullets. I saw blossoms of gore sprouting all over the abomination’s body as bullet after bullet ran through it.
When the gun finally clicked empty, she threw it aside. Then she jumped on the abomination, biting and clawing at its skin like a rabid animal. I turned and ran, never looking back.
***
After the Japanese infected our towns with the Black Death, the Chinese government came in and walled off the areas. They are still off-limits, the area poisoned and dangerous.
I had a DNA test done later in life, out of curiosity. They told me many interesting things, but one of the most interesting was that I have a genetic mutation that causes me to be resistant to the Black Death. It is, I think, the main reason I survived.
The horrors I would see after that bomb fell scarred me for the rest of my life. I still remember the sick, sweating people with black pustules the size of eggs, like a baby pushing against its mother’s body to get out. I remember the eyes of the women dissected alive, their fetuses ripped out of their bodies, their faces still open in expressions of eternal horror.
None of that will ever leave me. What Unit 731 brought us was hell on earth.

hey everybody, i am new to reddit and have recently made some new posts regarding my MA journey. i am 20 years old (F) and i found out i was pregnant one week ago today, april 12th.
i made the decision to go through with the MA. i went to just my consultation on tuesday. starting from the top, when i first went in i filled out loads and loads of paperwork. one of which states “the doctor has explained to you the procedure and you’re aware of all side effects” bla bla. i fill out everything else which btw still was stuff that was iffy to sign but just saying you know the basic risks, but i did NOT sign the paper that implied you had talked to the doctor because obviously i hadn’t talked to any doctor yet i just got there. i bring it all back up and the lady states i forgot to sign that one paper. i said oh ? i assumed i wasn’t supposed to considering i just got here and haven’t even talked to a doctor let alone been explained anything about the procedure. she’s like “he will, you just have to sign it now so we can finish the paperwork” something along those lines. i felt it was odd but i didn’t want to risk losing my spot or not complying and potentially not getting seen today also i assumed i’d be in good hands with these people i thought this was something that was sensitive and taken seriously they are also qualified trusted people right..?, so i signed it. paid my first due of $300, sat in the lobby for probably an hour or hour and a half. i got called back 2 different times for ultrasound and finger prick (they were supposed to ACTUALLY consult me mind you, talk to me about it and make sure no one is pressuring me to make this choice, that is literally their job, and take my blood pressure btw which they never did). i got there at 8 am sharp and left at 11:12. i’d say 90% of that time was sitting in the office even though i made sure to get there right when they opened so i’d be the first in line (even tho i had an appt because apparently an appt here means nothing and it’s just first come first serve) and 10% was actually being taken care of. also i am no expert on the procedure of abortion clinics so maybe this is normal (which it should not be) but it appears they over capacitate more than they can handle. easily 10 girls came in after me and i couldn’t even imagine how they will get treated by 5:30 which is the time they close everyday, so i was very lucky to show up right when the doors literally unlocked. they only have one doctor there (who doesn’t show up for hours to HIS job), 2 nurses, 1 lady at the front desk. i would like to mention all the nurses and staff were super kind people to me, just felt like they were disorganized. the doctor shows up 3 hours later. they opened at 8 he got there at 11:06, made his way from the back obviously because that is so embarrassing. i wasn’t sure if there was an emergency or reasoning why but i gave him the benefit of the doubt. 10min later they call me back to the back room to meet with the doctor and talk to him about the procedure. the state i live in requires you do a consultation appointment then your next appointment at least 24 hours later, you can be administered the pill. he walks in the room, friendly guy with an accent. doesn’t apologize about his tardiness, says something about my last name being cool then i tell him where its from and he just goes on a tangent talking to me about his daughters husband’s last name. maybe he was trying to get me comfortable and not feel so serious about this before we talk about the important stuff. anyways mid talking about that he gets a phone call, instead of silencing it he just straight up answers it. i actually recorded this to show my friends because i was in shock it was really laughable to be honest. for me i’m a chill understanding person and i wouldn’t have cared if someone has an emergency call but he shows up 3 hours late which one hour of that was mostly my waiting time for him and the rest just from the nurses maybe trying to space it out to not make him look bad? or maybe they were just slow and careless with everything as well, but needless to say i had been waiting and waiting. and also i wouldn’t have minded if he then gave me the time i deserved. he stayed on the phone for probably about 2 minutes with his wife, nothing important. and then he continues with me. this is exactly how it goes, doctor: “have you been pregnant before?” me: “no” doctor: “okay yea you’re young” me: “yea i’ve never been through anything like this before” gets phone call from wife answers it call ends doctor: “so when are you coming back?” then i expressed have concerns before i have a family thing the 21st and i’d really like to get through with this asap but im not sure how long it takes. he says “you’re doing same day abortion you take the pills here and you’ll be passed the same day and you can go to work the next day”. then the lady from the front comes and they kind of give each other a cue that i was all good to go? i get walked out by her and i ask so when am i supposed to come back like hello ? and she goes thursday at 9:30. i say okay and head out.
i really didn’t like this experience and felt so rushed, mistreated etc.. even with researching this stuff all day everyday ever since finding out i planned on continuing doing my own research to give myself a peace of mind. it’d just be nicer to hear it from the people administering the drug to you though you know? so i come back 2 days later on thursday at 9 because the lady said since my appt is at 9 if i get here at 9 i’ll have a better chance at being seen before the other people. i paid the rest of my dues $250 ($550 total). then sat there for 2 hours, while i’m sitting there i hear what i can’t believe is true but the nurses all complaining the doctor, what a shocker once again is late. at 11 ish he shows up again. they call me back into one of the procedure rooms. when the nurse walks me in there also she says to get dressed waist down i said even for the oral taking of the pill? she says ohh yes that’s right nevermind you don’t take your clothes off for that you’re not doing the intervaginal. while i’m sitting there in the room alone i hear one of the ladies going back and forth with him about how this is his job he can’t keep showing up late and he has no valid excuses, i honestly tuned it out as i had had enough and already was feeling so much anxiety being there doing what i was doing and then feeling so much incompetence from the whole staff. finally after 15 min of him talking to everyone at the front he comes in my room with one of the nurses. i say hi. the nurse gives me this one oval pill and then a half of some other circular pill. she says to swallow these ones whole (i assume one of these was the mifepristone not sure what the other was) they didn’t say what they were giving me. then the nurse leaves and comes back with 4 dissolvable pills which i knew was the misoprostol based off of me watching 20 videos on this not from anything they explained. the doctor then says to put it under my tongue. i asked if i could put them on the side of my cheeks cause that’s what my friend did and said it was really simple. he said “no i don’t know who came up with that method but that doesn’t work”. i said okay. then before i put them in my mouth i asked what would happen if by any chance i accidentally swallowed these 4 pills before 30min or before they fully dissolved. he said “you won’t” and i was like well just theoretically? do they still work or does effectiveness go down. he just says no it’s okay don’t worry about that. (dismissive) right here i just want to add that it’s in record i am a 20 year old who’s never been pregnant nor had an abortion so i am already very anxious and scared and the one thing that could make it better is feeling like the people taking care of you are smart and educated at their job, the way they acted worsened my anxiety. then after putting the 4 under my tongue the doctor goes “oh wait i didn’t do this right” i’m sitting there freaking out in confusion. first of all how do you make a mistake when that’s your only job and why are you announcing that to me and the nurse. then he asked the nurse to go get something i couldn’t hear what he mumbled. she comes back with the other half of whatever that first circular pill was that i took so i had to now try and swallow that other half without swallowing the 4 dissolvable pills in my mouth. he also said he wasn’t supposed to give me the 4 dissolvable pills yet? i said “so can i spit these out then if i was not supposed to take them?” and he said “no no it’s okay it’ll just soften your cervix even more and make it easier for you!” aka more cramps and pain so he doesn’t really give a shit. which by the way one of my big fears about all this was having excruciating pain from the cramping so now sitting here knowing i am supposedly taking an extra unnecessary dose that wasn’t supposed to be administered to me in the first place.. that has me heated and scared and just sad that i even came. i contemplated spitting it out honestly but i’m just trying to follow the doctors instructions because i don’t want to go against that even though i feel like i can’t even trust him. so i swallowed the other half of that pill that he was supposed to give me and tried to keep down the dissolvable pills even though swallowing another pill kind of made it harder. i walked out then cried mostly the whole car ride home. he sent me home with another dose of 4 misoprostol dissolvable pills to take at 5:30 pm (i took the first ones in office at 11:30 that i wasn’t supposed to take apparently). an hour after leaving the office i had insane diarrhea along with some minimal cramping but just felt like an indigestion feeling. no bleeding yet. then at 5:30 i took the second dose. after that the cramping got more intense and more diarrhea. still no bleeding which worried me. around 9:30 i started seeing some light pink when i’d wipe which had me relieved but still was expecting to see some more blood or major clots based off of others’ stories. i know everybody’s different but also the doctor said that at 10pm that night i should completely pass the pregnancy. which sounded completely wrong anyways but i was just expecting a little more. it is now 10 am the next day and i have some dark red blood but very minimal like a light period type of flow, i saw one or 2 little clots but nothing crazy at all. i could be very uptight just because i’ve never done this before and don’t know what to expect but i don’t know i just also felt like people in this industry would be a bit more on top of their stuff.
my mental experience prior to my appointments: the week leading up to i also JUST KNEW. it’s a feeling you get (you might know what i’m talking about if you’ve been pregnant before). i didn’t want to take a test because i didn’t want it to be true or real and was terrified because my situation isn’t the best for that. my friends finally convinced me to take a test on friday thought and it was positive, immediately 15 seconds after peeing. a lot of mixed emotions, scared overweighing most of them tho as i was not trying for a baby, and was cycle tracking with my boyfriend. i live in a household with a parent that would be completely livid and unsupportive as they think i am a virgin (controlling mentally abusive parent). even though i said i was scared, i started thinking with my thoughts and actually developed a want for motherhood. it’s something quite interesting your body does to you when you’re pregnant, you literally are having hormones and chemicals flowing through your body preparing you to give life, i think it’s beautiful. and crazy because if you asked me 2 month ago before this happened to me before i had this feeling inside of me “what would you do?” i’d say, i’d terminate 100% because i am too young, no desire or want for a kid right now and it was not planned. the truth is no one is fully ready, yes more situations are ideal and they plan for it but that does not mean you can’t have a kid. when you’re actually in the situation though everything changes. anyways friday night goes by cry myself to sleep scared, saturday goes by can’t do anything places are closed, sunday same thing. monday i call a local abortion clinic that has 3 chain locations within my state i believe, and i got an appointment next day. i opted to do this local place because 1) i had a friend who had a “good” experience there, and 2) planned parenthood didn’t have appt’s for the next 2 weeks. this is something that i honestly wanted time to make a decision about but i was cornered and forced to feel as if i didn’t have a decision with my living situation. also i am going on a family vacation this upcoming week and felt i had to take care of it before that.
i just am having so much anxiety and i could be overthinking but i want all of this to work and it doesn’t help me that i feel these people don’t know or care what they’re doing. let me know if you’ve had a similar experience or something seems wrong.
thank you all for taking the time to read💙

hey everybody, i am new to reddit and have recently made some new posts regarding my MA journey. i am 20 years old (F) and i found out i was pregnant one week ago today, april 12th.
the week leading up to i also JUST KNEW. it’s a feeling you get (you might know what i’m talking about if you’ve been pregnant before). i didn’t want to take a test because i didn’t want it to be true or real and was terrified because my situation isn’t the best for that. my friends finally convinced me to take a test on friday thought and it was positive, immediately 15 seconds after peeing. a lot of mixed emotions, scared overweighing most of them tho as i was not trying for a baby, and was cycle tracking with my boyfriend. i live in a household with a parent that would be completely livid and unsupportive as they think i am a virgin (controlling mentally abusive parent). even though i said i was scared, i started thinking with my thoughts and actually developed a want for motherhood. it’s something quite interesting your body does to you when you’re pregnant, you literally are having hormones and chemicals flowing through your body preparing you to give life, i think it’s beautiful. and crazy because if you asked me 2 month ago before this happened to me before i had this feeling inside of me “what would you do?” i’d say, i’d terminate 100% because i am too young, no desire or want for a kid right now and it was not planned. the truth is no one is fully ready, yes more situations are ideal and they plan for it but that does not mean you can’t have a kid. when you’re actually in the situation though everything changes. anyways friday night goes by cry myself to sleep scared, saturday goes by can’t do anything places are closed, sunday same thing.
monday i call a local abortion clinic that has 3 chain locations within my state i believe, and i got an appointment next day. i opted to do this local place because 1) i had a friend who had a “good” experience there, and 2) planned parenthood didn’t have appt’s for the next 2 weeks. this is something that i honestly wanted time to make a decision about but i was cornered and forced to feel as if i didn’t have a decision with my living situation. also i am going on a family vacation this upcoming week and felt i had to take care of it before that.
i made the decision to go through with the MA. i went to just my consultation on tuesday. starting from the top, when i first went in i filled out loads and loads of paperwork. one of which states “the doctor has explained to you the procedure and you’re aware of all side effects” bla bla. i fill out everything else which btw still was stuff that was iffy to sign but just saying you know the basic risks, but i did NOT sign the paper that implied you had talked to the doctor because obviously i hadn’t talked to any doctor yet i just got there. i bring it all back up and the lady states i forgot to sign that one paper. i said oh ? i assumed i wasn’t supposed to considering i just got here and haven’t even talked to a doctor let alone been explained anything about the procedure. she’s like “he will, you just have to sign it now so we can finish the paperwork” something along those lines. i felt it was odd but i didn’t want to risk losing my spot or not complying and potentially not getting seen today also i assumed i’d be in good hands with these people i thought this was something that was sensitive and taken seriously they are also qualified trusted people right..?, so i signed it. paid my first due of $300, sat in the lobby for probably an hour or hour and a half. i got called back 2 different times for ultrasound and finger prick (they were supposed to ACTUALLY consult me mind you, talk to me about it and make sure no one is pressuring me to make this choice, that is literally their job, and take my blood pressure btw which they never did). i got there at 8 am sharp and left at 11:12. i’d say 90% of that time was sitting in the office even though i made sure to get there right when they opened so i’d be the first in line (even tho i had an appt because apparently an appt here means nothing and it’s just first come first serve) and 10% was actually being taken care of. also i am no expert on the procedure of abortion clinics so maybe this is normal (which it should not be) but it appears they over capacitate more than they can handle. easily 10 girls came in after me and i couldn’t even imagine how they will get treated by 5:30 which is the time they close everyday, so i was very lucky to show up right when the doors literally unlocked. they only have one doctor there (who doesn’t show up for hours to HIS job), 2 nurses, 1 lady at the front desk. i would like to mention all the nurses and staff were super kind people to me, just felt like they were disorganized. the doctor shows up 3 hours later. they opened at 8 he got there at 11:06, made his way from the back obviously because that is so embarrassing. i wasn’t sure if there was an emergency or reasoning why but i gave him the benefit of the doubt. 10min later they call me back to the back room to meet with the doctor and talk to him about the procedure. the state i live in requires you do a consultation appointment then your next appointment at least 24 hours later, you can be administered the pill. he walks in the room, friendly guy with an accent. doesn’t apologize about his tardiness, says something about my last name being cool then i tell him where its from and he just goes on a tangent talking to me about his daughters husband’s last name. maybe he was trying to get me comfortable and not feel so serious about this before we talk about the important stuff. anyways mid talking about that he gets a phone call, instead of silencing it he just straight up answers it. i actually recorded this to show my friends because i was in shock it was really laughable to be honest. for me i’m a chill understanding person and i wouldn’t have cared if someone has an emergency call but he shows up 3 hours late which one hour of that was mostly my waiting time for him and the rest just from the nurses maybe trying to space it out to not make him look bad? or maybe they were just slow and careless with everything as well, but needless to say i had been waiting and waiting. and also i wouldn’t have minded if he then gave me the time i deserved. he stayed on the phone for probably about 2 minutes with his wife, nothing important. and then he continues with me. this is exactly how it goes, doctor: “have you been pregnant before?” me: “no” doctor: “okay yea you’re young” me: “yea i’ve never been through anything like this before” gets phone call from wife answers it call ends doctor: “so when are you coming back?” then i expressed have concerns before i have a family thing the 21st and i’d really like to get through with this asap but im not sure how long it takes. he says “you’re doing same day abortion you take the pills here and you’ll be passed the same day and you can go to work the next day”. then the lady from the front comes and they kind of give each other a cue that i was all good to go? i get walked out by her and i ask so when am i supposed to come back like hello ? and she goes thursday at 9:30. i say okay and head out.
i really didn’t like this experience and felt so rushed, mistreated etc.. even with researching this stuff all day everyday ever since finding out i planned on continuing doing my own research to give myself a peace of mind. it’d just be nicer to hear it from the people administering the drug to you though you know? so i come back 2 days later on thursday at 9 because the lady said since my appt is at 9 if i get here at 9 i’ll have a better chance at being seen before the other people. i paid the rest of my dues $250 ($550 total). then sat there for 2 hours, while i’m sitting there i hear what i can’t believe is true but the nurses all complaining the doctor, what a shocker once again is late. at 11 ish he shows up again. they call me back into one of the procedure rooms. when the nurse walks me in there also she says to get dressed waist down i said even for the oral taking of the pill? she says ohh yes that’s right nevermind you don’t take your clothes off for that you’re not doing the intervaginal. while i’m sitting there in the room alone i hear one of the ladies going back and forth with him about how this is his job he can’t keep showing up late and he has no valid excuses, i honestly tuned it out as i had had enough and already was feeling so much anxiety being there doing what i was doing and then feeling so much incompetence from the whole staff. finally after 15 min of him talking to everyone at the front he comes in my room with one of the nurses. i say hi. the nurse gives me this one oval pill and then a half of some other circular pill. she says to swallow these ones whole (i assume one of these was the mifepristone not sure what the other was) they didn’t say what they were giving me. then the nurse leaves and comes back with 4 dissolvable pills which i knew was the misoprostol based off of me watching 20 videos on this not from anything they explained. the doctor then says to put it under my tongue. i asked if i could put them on the side of my cheeks cause that’s what my friend did and said it was really simple. he said “no i don’t know who came up with that method but that doesn’t work”. i said okay. then before i put them in my mouth i asked what would happen if by any chance i accidentally swallowed these 4 pills before 30min or before they fully dissolved. he said “you won’t” and i was like well just theoretically? do they still work or does effectiveness go down. he just says no it’s okay don’t worry about that. (dismissive) right here i just want to add that it’s in record i am a 20 year old who’s never been pregnant nor had an abortion so i am already very anxious and scared and the one thing that could make it better is feeling like the people taking care of you are smart and educated at their job, the way they acted worsened my anxiety. then after putting the 4 under my tongue the doctor goes “oh wait i didn’t do this right” i’m sitting there freaking out in confusion. first of all how do you make a mistake when that’s your only job and why are you announcing that to me and the nurse. then he asked the nurse to go get something i couldn’t hear what he mumbled. she comes back with the other half of whatever that first circular pill was that i took so i had to now try and swallow that other half without swallowing the 4 dissolvable pills in my mouth. he also said he wasn’t supposed to give me the 4 dissolvable pills yet? i said “so can i spit these out then if i was not supposed to take them?” and he said “no no it’s okay it’ll just soften your cervix even more and make it easier for you!” aka more cramps and pain so he doesn’t really give a shit. which by the way one of my big fears about all this was having excruciating pain from the cramping so now sitting here knowing i am supposedly taking an extra unnecessary dose that wasn’t supposed to be administered to me in the first place.. that has me heated and scared and just sad that i even came. i contemplated spitting it out honestly but i’m just trying to follow the doctors instructions because i don’t want to go against that even though i feel like i can’t even trust him. so i swallowed the other half of that pill that he was supposed to give me and tried to keep down the dissolvable pills even though swallowing another pill kind of made it harder. i walked out then cried mostly the whole car ride home. he sent me home with another dose of 4 misoprostol dissolvable pills to take at 5:30 pm (i took the first ones in office at 11:30 that i wasn’t supposed to take apparently). an hour after leaving the office i had insane diarrhea along with some minimal cramping but just felt like an indigestion feeling. no bleeding yet. then at 5:30 i took the second dose. after that the cramping got more intense and more diarrhea. still no bleeding which worried me. around 9:30 i started seeing some light pink when i’d wipe which had me relieved but still was expecting to see some more blood or major clots based off of others’ stories. i know everybody’s different but also the doctor said that at 10pm that night i should completely pass the pregnancy. which sounded completely wrong anyways but i was just expecting a little more. it is now 10 am the next day and i have some dark red blood but very minimal like a light period type of flow, i saw one or 2 little clots but nothing crazy at all. i could be very uptight just because i’ve never done this before and don’t know what to expect but i don’t know i just also felt like people in this industry would be a bit more on top of their stuff. i just am having so much anxiety and i could be overthinking but i want all of this to work and it doesn’t help me that i feel these people don’t know or care what they’re doing. let me know if you’ve had a similar experience or something seems wrong. thank you all for taking the time to read💙

Me and my family are immigrants, or expats, its the same thing. I'm originally from Slovakia, my wife from the Philippines, and our two boys (3y, 8m) are born here.
The way healthcare works here, especially GPs, is different from what we're used to from our home countries. They function as a "gate" to actual health care, to make sure people don't waste resources on trivial issues. At least that is my understanding.
My wife was always frustrated with the GP system here, and me often times on a personal level as well, however on a country level, I always praised it. I understand that when healthcare is too open to people, they will abuse it(even unintentionally), waste resources on simple issues, ask for care when the best they can do is just chill at home and wait for the cold to pass. This should in theory allow to allocate more resources where it actually matters. I hold on to this belief after multiple frustrating situations where better care should have been given.
However our experience from the past couple days is blackpilling me hard. I'm not sure if I should now think the system is just too cruel, or whether we simply encountered multiple incompetent healthcare professionals.
My 8m old baby suddenly started vomiting and having diarrhea on Tuesday morning. Since he's our second boy, we thought we can deal with it ourselves, as we've had many experiences with gastroenteritis in the past.
We tried our best to feed him small amounts, make sure he is hydrated. But he kept on puking, and pooping water.
On Wednesday afternoon we went to the GP, our boy already started looking dehydrated, eyes a little bit sunken, constantly tired and weak. GP prescribed Ondansetron , we administered it, and kept on trying to give him milk and water.
However after the GP appointment at 2pm, he started deteriorating extremely quickly, so we went to the local spoedpost(emergency). Our boy had at that point blue lips, sunken eyes and mouth, and blotchy purplish skin on cheeks and thighs.
The spoedpost visit was the one that shocked me. They did assessment for nearly 2 hours, called in two extra professionals, one GP and one pediatrician, to figure out what's happening. They couldn't match the symptoms, concluded they are not sure, said that it's probably due to a viral infection, and said that they don't want to hospitalize yet. Prescribed a few more doses of Ondansetron, sent us home.
In the evening on Wednesday, my baby looked emaciated, I've seen photos of prisoners in Auschwitz and that's what his eyes and lips looked like. I managed to feed him small amounts of milk every hour, so the night itself was good, because the total amount of liquids he got in him was decent.
On Thursday morning, he looked a tiny bit better than the night before, but extremely weak and lethargic and obviously not okay. We asked for another GP visit, and this (different) GP finally sent us to a Kinderkliniek.
The doctors at Kinderkliniek said he was extremely dehydrated. They weighed him, and he lost 1KG of water in the span of two days. They administered ORS via a tube through his nose directly to his stomach, and kept him there the whole day. Since then, he has been getting better, and now he's at home, sleeping after eating well. After today's visit, they removed the tube from his nose, and his weight is nearly fully recovered.
The doctors at kinderkliniek expressed that they don't know why the spoedpost people didn't send him immediately to the kliniek, said he should've been sent there, with his level of dehydration.
I guess I just needed to rant a bit. Not sure what the point of this post is. I kept blindly believing that the system here is good. I still hope that this was just a single occurrence and doesn't represent the whole system.
​

I’ve had stomach issues since I got sick. Almost 3 years at this point. I get cramping lower abdominal pain, nausea, acid reflux, constipation, and/or diarrhea to some extent every day. I’ve given up gluten and dairy, both of which I’m sensitive too. I’ve also had to give up a bunch of other foods because they cause allergic type reactions (suspected MCAS). I’ve seen a GI doctor, a traditional dietitian and now a functional dietitian. Almost everything they have told me to do makes symptoms worse. I have an upcoming endoscopy/colonoscopy to check for any damage but I suspect the GI doctor won’t find anything (cause our tests are always normal).
After that I’m trying an elimination diet based on an MRT test I took that tells you which foods cause inflammation. But it is restrictive so not a long term solution. The plan is to try to add the foods back in after a few months. So far I’ve been able to identify some triggers, but other times a food that is usually fine will cause issues. It’s not consistent. Which makes me think it is just how fatigued I am impacting my bodies ability to digest properly. If neither of these helps or finds another course to pursue, I don’t know what else to do. Is this just normal for us? My very first symptom when I got sick was severe lower abdominal pain cramping with a fever and chills. They gave me antibiotics in the ER and that seemed to be what set off the CFS. I still get pain in the same spot, so that’s why I’m doing the endoscopy. But I don’t expect they will find anything.
Appreciate any thoughts you all have. A keto or carnivore diet are not options because most meat triggers symptoms (I can have some chicken and eggs, but not every day) and I can’t do dairy. If this is just normal for us then I will stick with the foods I’m tolerating and just eat what I can.

I have had URQ pain in “flair ups” as well as chronically for a decade. I’m a 24 year old woman who gets chills and hot flashes constantly, has stomach ulcers, EoE, and IBS-D.
I haven’t eaten in 3 days. I can’t hold down jello. PPIs hurt and they won’t listen and keeps giving to me pill form. They just switched my pain meds to pill form.
Even with the Duladid I am writhing. I’m so weak. I’m so ITCHY everywhere. Between my shoulder blades to the right, my right side, my right chest, my guts, just knives gnawing and agony.
I projectile vomited bile on my back during the PIPDA scan while they injected me with the shit to empty my gallbladder ader to see how it contracts. It came back 92%, and the doctor blamed it on CHS, backpeddled when I questioned her and apologized to me, then said my gallbladder blader is perfectly fine and 93% is great and a hyperkinetic gallbladder der is “impossible”. She then said it must be muscular skeletal and put me on a different muscle relaxer.
Gallbladder lader issues run in both sides of my recent family.
I honestly don’t think I can survive this pain, and she said she was going to work to get me outpatient without pain medication. I did argue to the point where the Gastro team will look at me, but got no further information. I told her I had scans of ulcers (endoscopy and colonoscopy in the past 5 years, and she left without even getting the name of the place or the doctors to get the scans sent over.
How do I stand up for myself here if I get shut down again?
She is a DO who specializes in tabacco use disorders. I am here after being admitted from the ER and I don’t know if there’s another doctor I can see and I feel way too sick to leave. I’m stuck here, but I have yet to talk to the Gastro team.
Any tips?
Update: Gastro doc stopped by. Was sarcastic with me, and kept assuming things before I could talk. Said my pain is muscular and I’m vomiting because of IBS-D and had me do a suppository. Said I’m running to the bathroom after eating because I have diarrhea, because I have poop left in my colon intestines? I haven’t really pooped much because I haven’t eaten in days. I give up. None is going to believe me. I get belittled and dismissed everywhere I go. I don’t have any fight left. Did the suppository. It didn’t do anything but cause pain. I don’t know his theory, he didn’t explain it super well and got frustrated with me when I asked questions or clarification so I just went along with it. Maybe I’ll let the pain come back here so it doesn’t shock me when I get discharged with nothing to help. He said I can talk to a surgeon about it ( I didn’t ask to) and left saying something about “your desperate you’ll do what you want” even though I didn’t say I wanted surgery or anything close. He came in the room staring me down, I don’t know why. Im not trying to trick anyone I’m just trying to say what’s happening to me and that it too painful to live with. I didn’t say anything negative to him I don’t know why he was so hostile to me off the bat. I still don’t understand the suppository. It just hurt.
He made it seem like if the surgeon thought I needed my gallbladder out, and insinuated that they will becaus they are trigger happy, that I can hurt myself more and have a bad outcome. So if I do go along with what the surgeon suggests and I make a mistake it’s all my fault and the suffering will be 100% on me and I would have made a horrible decision. I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t believe myself, I don’t know what’s real, I give up. I just want to go home and suffer in silence again, at least I won’t be accused of random weird shit or be have to deal with passive aggressive bullshit every time I try to get help. Maybe it is in my head.
Update: the doctors are disagreeing with each other whether or not hyperkinetic gallblader is real. Surgeon thinks mine is not normal and wants to do and endoscopy to see if they can see anything, he believes me. Every other doctor here has gaslit me when I was at my most weak and vulnerable, I am shocked people would treat anyone this way, let alone someone in my state. Pain is agonizing and they switched me to a pain med orallly that doesn’t work as well. The pain from the suppository still hurts. They keep giving me PPIs and muscle relaxers, they don’t do anything but make the pain worse. Still can’t keep full liquids down, haven’t eaten in 4 days? So itchy, so much pain, so hungry.
I just want the stabbing right sided pain to go away that’s all I ask. It not humane

Ive met my GI in person once. Hes never had questions about my symptoms and when I said “how confident are you that this is ibs? Because in my eyes, i have abdominal pain, and no appetitie, and we cant figure out why, so i was reccomended to you, and i was told i have IBS.” He said “this is cut and dry, im pretty confident.” He must have looked at my medical record and made a diagnosis. I have had ultrasounds, xrays, ct scans, colocscopies, endoscopies, etc. we found swelling and redness as well as active focal collitis, but i was told thats all normal and probably due to colonscopy prep. For me, prep was a normal day of diarrhea. I also had redness and swelling in the “entire examined stomach” apparently this was normal too. Pretty much everything else has been normal, except a kidney cyst which i was also told was nothing to worry about.
I been told i have ibs since i was like 10. Ive always had bad stomach pains and diarrhea, but up until 3 years ago, These pains came when i had to poop. Now they just come, and they have changed in nature and location.
My poops sometimes float, can be water, can be solid, can be mud, can be light brown/yellow/gold-ish, can be mucus-y, i almost never have a healthy looking poop. Sometimes i wont even poop for days. Sometimes ill have like a bag of chips, and a slim jim over the course of 3 days. Rarely ill eat 2 meals in a day, those days make me happy.There was a period in time where i was eating yogurt daily, and i seemed to have improvement in pain and poop, but not appetitite.
Im on amitriptyline for stomach pain. I still barely eat, im 6’1” 150 lbs. when i do eat, its at night, after ive come home from work and had time to smoke a joint or two and chill. The medicine seems to have helped with the pain, but its not gone. Idrc what i have, as long as it wont kill me, but i want to eat food, and i want the pains gone. I dont eat breakfast or lunch. I have been addicted to nicotine for about 15 years. Starting to think the pains and lack of appetitite may be from nicotine, but the nature of the pains and the lack of appetitite is new-ish for the last 3 years. I also have been reading into pancreatic exocrine insufficiency. But i have had ultrasounds, thinking they would have identified a bile duct issue… i also figure the stomach pains could maybe be from having an empty stomach all the time.
I want a more definitive diagnosis. I feel like we are just covering up symptoms, and not treating the cause. Does anyone have some advice on things i should educate myself on? Are there treatments i should ask about? Diagnostic tests i should have done? Any advice is welcomed.

I’m about to be 27 and I live with my mom (I know, I know, it’s just too expensive to move out). I have a degree and a job. I’ve been complaining about my job lately as it has been stressing me out, but I really did not want to miss anymore work this month due to some vet bills coming up.
My mom has dealt with me having anxiety as a child and not wanting to go to school. I would fake sick to get out of school because I was so anxious and had no idea how to cope with it. This went on for many years in grade school, but I still managed to get my degree and work some pretty great jobs later on as an adult.
Fast forward to more recent times and I called out from work last Monday because I just really didn’t feel like going. I have PMDD so every month around that time is a struggle. I didn’t think I would actually get sick the next week. This past Sunday, I came down with a bad stomach bug/possible food poisoning. I’ve been having nausea, stomach pain, headaches, chills, I threw up at least four times after having tea and crackers, and had diarrhea all of Sunday and into Monday morning.
I called out this Monday because I know I’m definitely sick. Starting to feel better, but still sick. She really asked me if I was staying home from work as if none of that happened. I said yea, I was throwing up yesterday and having diarrhea non-stop, why wouldn’t I stay home? Later she asked me if I thought this was caused by anxiety and depression from work. I got annoyed again and said no, I know the difference and I’m clearly sick.
It’s now Tuesday and I’m still having some stomach cramps, nausea, and diarrhea so I decided to call in for one more day for mine and my coworkers sake. She barely even spoke to me when she saw me in my pajamas, not ready for work this morning. She hasn’t even told me to feel better or shown any real concern besides making me a tea on Sunday.
I think she truly believes I’m either faking it, or that it’s all in my head. It’s just making me feel even worse. I feel like the girl who cried wolf even though I know I’m not that girl anymore. Yes, I have hard times. And at times like last week, I do struggle to push through. This time I really am just sick. I don’t know what to do or what to say. It probably doesn’t matter what she thinks at the end of the day, I know I need to do what’s best for myself. If I were living on my own it wouldn’t matter anyway because she probably wouldn’t know about it. I don’t know how to get rid of the nagging need to prove to her that I’m actually sick so that she won’t be upset with me. What do I do, if anything?

I'm afraid I won't be able to be brief with this post.
The gurus' names were Jiddu and UG Krishnamurti (shared last names, and although they were not family, the second one was highly influenced by the first one as far as I'm concerned).
Also, I have to add that they technically didn't call themselves gurus nor spiritual. In fact, they are often called anti-spiritual anti-gurus. Whatever; I say this just because of technicality, but in my honest opinion, if you have a following around that give you shelter and food and nice things just to listen to you talk and ramble on about your ideas, and texts are written about you by those same followers, you are a guru and a spiritual teacher in my own, personal book. It's ok, I mean, to each their own, they had a right to exist and to say
These fellas basically said that you are your thoughts, your mind, and you are listening to yourself all the time. Also, they claimed that thoughts create your perception of reality, so basically it's all an illusion (duh, right? I mean, I kinda knew that). Also, they believe that thoughts are not intelligent, that the real intelligence is life itself, nature, and that human thought is basically fantasy and shit. They questioned enlightenment (which is something I really never cared about until now) and the latter guy even claimed that it was another fantasy of human thought, that you never really change, while simultaneously claiming that he had undergone a spontaneous transformation (self-proclaimed as "the calamity") in which he had suffered a physical "death" and "resurrection" had "woken up" and entered into a self-proclaimed "natural state" in which his experience was not contaminated by knowledge -whatever that means*. Also, they basically said no free will, self is an illusion, meditation is evil/not what you think/not necessary; love as you know it is an illusion, you had better eat chocolate... and many other fun stuff to think about (Yay!).
*This event seems to me like an awfully hagiographic and convenient thing to happen to him, given his philosophy. Also, the rich details he went into with his explanations of everything, as if he had access to the knowledge of the neuroendocrine movement of his body makes it all Sound like a big fakery to me. Maybe it was psychosomatic or who knows? Maybe he was a "chosen one" of nature, as he makes it seem. Highly unlikely, but the point is that my mind is constantly saying: "yeah, but what if it's real?" That's the bother for me, that's the point: I want to not care.
I honestly was interested at first, that's why I would listen to the fellas, however, one day, I started to feel a generalized anxiety coming out of nowhere and then I went into DP/DR syndrome. This was 5 months ago. In this timeline, I have suffered from GA, depression, bouts of unwanted euphoria, I suffered a panic attack, I got my gut microbiome destroyed, lost 11kg, and I had (and still have) existential obsessions and compulsions related to the content of these guys philosophies. I really wanted to not believe them, to be rid of those ideas, to knot entertain them anymore and go back to living BUT that was the problem: that fight made it all worse and got those ideas more and more inside my mind.
By now, I can say that I have overcome GAD, DP/DR and the digestive issues, as well as anxiety dizziness and other physical symptoms. However, the existential obsessions and the constant debate are still there. I have left hell, but I remain in purgatory. In the end, it's kind the same because I'm not OK
I honestly don't even care anymore about understanding/ not understanding the message/ anti- message of these gurus, I just want to be able to chill with my dogs as I used to. Just enjoy being with them in peace. I used to love my imagination, I was constantly having ideas about stories to write. I was just fine with life, believe me, I was just OK. Now, poof, it's all just gone. No creativity, no interest for reading, writing or games, no ideas... nothing. Also, I'd like to enjoy Baldur's Gate 3.
But it's all proving quite difficult because of the mental diarrhea: "did I do that or was it automatic? Who am I? Am I laughing or is it automatic? Do I love my dogs or I just think I love them? Are my dogs just a thought in my mind? Am I robot who thinks he is conscious, but it's really not? What if lose my interests and can never have creative enjoyments and ideas anymore? When X Krishnamurti said this or that, what was the deal? Does my mental condition prove in a way the dreadful reality of life that I'm contemplating?" And so on.
I have to stress this: if you are a fan of any of these gurus and his message has changed your life for the better, all power to you. I'm not interested in going more in depth into these ideas nor I'm interested in being told that I really didn't get what they were saying and/or i'm suffering because I'm not grasping """"the tRuTh"""". I was fine; now I'm not and I'm working to be fine again. That's it.
Anyways. Thank you so much for reading this Bible I wrote. Even if I don't receive feedback or anything, it means a lot that you have read me.
TL;DR: I listened to a couple of spiritual gurus and now I am mentally stuck, obsessed, detached from my interests and loved ones, deprived from my creativity, depressed, no dreams, no aspirations, no enjoyment... Basically, I'm not doing so well.

I thought after taking the vancomycin where I had started finally having solid poos again I was in the clear. Until the cdiff came back with a vengeance. This time it was a more proper cdiff infection. I was in the bathroom 10+ times a day with diarrhea. I'm not sure how it's even possible as I was at the point where I couldn't stomach food.
Fast forward, and I am now on Flagyl (metronidazole). On vancomycin, I didn't feel all that bad taking it. On this, however, holy moly. Earlier today, I had such a spell of dizziness that I couldn't focus or see straight. My stomach area felt like it was going to explode. I got the chills and cold sweats. All I could do was curl up and try to get some sleep. Is this normal for this type of medication? I read dificid helps for most people but sadly my insurance won't cover it for some reason? They want me to pay 6000$ out of pocket and no one has fidaxomycin (generic) in my area. Should I continue taking this as I've read quite a few people go thru this with it or should I stop and try to get put on something else? I have very limited options.
Edit: I also just read it's not good to eat things like bananas while on this medication and I didn't realize until after I googled it now as the pharmacist only mentioned not to drink any type of alcohol. A good majority of my diet has been bananas as I cant handle too much else. I probably had a good 5 or 6 bananas since I started taking the medication. Could be why I didn't feel good, but I don't know how these things interact.

So after much, like way too much, research, I've finally come to understand the difference between the si tertiary of infp, versus the te tertiary of enfp. Or maybe just more how I see it play out in myself.
While typing myself, I related a lot to both Ne and Fi. I couldn't decide which is more dominant. I'm an ambivert, either I am super reserved or I have verbal diarrhea beating myself up later on. I love new ideas, when something feels off, or boring, I right away look for the why and what I could change in my life. At the same time, I am very principled. Like don't make me go against my morals - it isn't happening. Deciding which of these 2 functions come first didn't help me. The next info I found to figure out wether I am an enfp or infp is to compare the tertiary functions. Si for infp, te for enfp.
I thought I must be an enfp because I get stuff done. When I'm assigned something to do, I quickly get it done and out of my way. I see stuff needs to get done, I get it done. I'm out there in the world, physically doing. But...here is what I just realized...the reason I get stuff done is actually because of my si. My si jumps in when something is assigned telling me "remember what happens if you don't do it right away, you end up never getting to it and feeling awful." I also know if I get it done, later on I'll be able to chill without anything pressing on my to do list, I can just dive deep into whatever I'm in the mood for.
I also realized my si helps me with my organization, not my te. My si know that if I don't make sure the laundry is done when my kids are running out of clothes, they will have nothing to wear and go around looking neglected. My si teaches me to prepare lunch boxes and clothes for them the night before, or I will be a hot mess in the morning when I'm trying to get the kids to school on time. It's not te goals. It's just si, has helped me learn from past mistakes to avoid stress.
I don't think I relate to the ambitious side of te. I get stuff done, but they're never big ambitious stuff. It's usually a new project, a work thing that just has to get done, or a house thing that just has to get done for things to be running smoothly. I'm not usually working towards any big goals, or achieving large feats. Just living the ordinary quiet life trying to survive with the least stress possible.
Or maybe I'm neither infp, nor enfp, and I've still got a way to go 🤔🫢 what do you think? Am I on to something here? Anyone relate? 😬

Speaking honestly from personal experience with the other zodiac signs. I honestly love all you guys at the end of the day and the good parts of your personalities.
Aries: I LOVE to get into debates with Aries. You guys are so fiery with discussions and we can talk for hours on end. Chillest of the fire signs, super laid back until something really catches your attention.
Taurus: The men are kind of shy and nervous around me. The women are so sweet and laidback, kind of stubborn and stand on their ground. Lots of offhand or sarcastic comments or jokes and refuse to talk to me when holding a grudge, even if I try to fix things multiple times. Will gaslight and attack the hell out of you if you get on their bad side. Masters at roasting people. Most sensitive of the earth signs.
Gemini: I know my own Geminis when I see one! I always get that excited, talkative ADHD energy back. The men are usually more quiet and serious, and all the men I’ve known have had a troublesome streak with misbehaving or breaking the law. We can’t take things seriously sometimes and try to incorporate humosilliness into many situations. I understand Geminis so well and we can read each other instantly. Guilty of spewing verbal diarrhea ✋
Cancer: Can be pretty funny and shy at times. Comes off as sensitive and questions a lot of things I say. You guys have this puzzled/intrigued/sensitive demeanor that makes me feel like dampening my excited energy to try to understand and empathize with you. I get bored easily with Cancer unless they’re the talkative type because I feel like I’m too energetic for them. They act nice for so long before they start manipulating you and stop responding if you call them out.
Leo: Leo’s are dramatic AF even talking about the most random things. They like to use exaggerated tone, hand movement, and eyes to express anything and everything. Female Leos are so energetic and bubbly and I absolutely adore watching them talk passionately. Male Leos are so incredibly charming but it sucks when we’re having fun talking and then boom, they suddenly get all serious like a switch went off. I love giving into their praise kinks and watching them absorb compliments like a sponge. Always have a slight smirk and narrowed-eye look to them that gives off confidence and arrogance at the same time.
Virgo: I have a love/hate relationship with Virgos. I have too wayyy many of them in my life, probably for a good reason. Every single one of them keep me in check all the time and give me unwarranted advice and criticism, which I love until they it crosses controlling territory. Incredibly serious most of the time and I love having intellectual conversations with them. They irritate me sometimes the way they want to take over even the smallest details in my routine, but I always end up accepting it. Virgo parents often end up doing their kid’s homework because they think they can do it best. As a Gemini, I especially appreciate how they’re the only ones who quickly tolerate and accept me for my weird quirks and personality. A little too extreme with being frugal and orderly sometimes but it works out for them. The men put on the good guy act and admit to it, not before gaslighting the hell out of you. Can be VERY verbally abusive. I will stand by Virgos and have their backs no matter what, though.
Libra: Haven’t met many, but they’re extremely social and typically extroverted. Always surrounded with friends and the life of the party. The men aren’t too attractive since they all have this roundish-square look to their face. Loves to tease you and make you laugh all the time. Libras make great parents. Angry Libras can get very scary.
Scorpio: I cannot get along with any Scorpio for the life of me, unless they’re super sweet. You guys are always leering at me and suspicious of every damn thing I say. Easily gets annoyed by my excited and energetic personality. I’ve tried every possible way to be friendly and understanding with Scorpio but they just seem to act judgmentally with me. I always get the feeling that they’re talking behind my back the way they look at me after giving excessive flattery that feels fake. Unevolved Scorpio men are very manipulative and sneaky. The women are gorgeous though and tend to lean towards the dark aesthetic look. Can a Scorpio let me know wtf is going and why they don’t like me so much 😭
Sagittarius: I barely know any Sagittarius, but they definitely give off fresh, golden retriever energy. The men I’ve encountered are more reserved and mysterious. Sag women are so fun to talk with and always down to hang out!
Capricorn: Calm, analytical, and grounded. Caring, down to earth and makes a point to empathize/sympathize with you. They look depressed sometimes. Super funny and have versatile humor.
Aquarius: Straight up intellectual and weirdos in a likable way. Very chill and laidback compared to the other air signs. 1st decan Aquas are coldest of them all, while 3rd decan Aquas are more emotionally in touch and sensitive. They’re kind of hard to talk to and aloof, especially when they’re not interested in you. Aqua males are the MAN HOES of the zodiac signs, they loveee to flirt and chase then disappear and pretend like none of it happened. Terrible at sex and robotic in bed. Aqua females have this bitchy energy and look, I love how I stop communicating for weeks and still come back to our friendship. We Geminis and Aquarius can ghost each other and not be bothered.
Pisces: The men are just like Cancer men to me, more so sensitive than Pisces women. Only water sign I get along with, you guys are lowkey funny and super receptive to my upbeat energy. I LOVE Pisces women and how fun they are. They have this slightly sad/downward tilt to their face and a twinkling sparkle on their eyes. Very wishy-washy and have trouble communicating on certain decisions or feelings out of the fear that they might hurt my feelings. Can get quickly abusive and manipulative before your very eyes.

So my biological daughter is a year and a half old and she was born with a genetic chromosomal anomaly and I think have some good insight into some things going on with Alicia.
Firstly, my MIL who is a complete narcissist has a biological daughter with the same chromosomal anomaly as my daughter (her granddaughter). Upon my daughter being born and this being discovered, my MIL immediately started comparing our children’s difficulties and various diagnoses as if it were a competition. I would confide in her about how her granddaughter was doing and instead of offering support, she would simply try to “one-up” me. The woman (my MIL) always rubbed me the wrong way bc she basically takes advantage of churches to donate gifts to her family and then turns around and sells them on FB market place, applies for various giveaways and sweepstakes by using get child’s diagnoses as a sob story, etc.
After my daughter was born, I completely cut ties with her when she refused to offer any help with providing medical records of her daughter and her sister who both have the chromosomal anomaly which could be beneficial to provide to doctors to treat my daughter, along with a couple other fiascos of her acting childish and selfish.
ANYWAY, long story short, one take away I’ve had after experiencing having a special needs child is this: a LOT of people who have special needs children are like Alicia. They want to get kudos and sympathy for having children with special needs and they thrive on it. They live on attention from social media and post WAY too much personal information about their children. It’s possibly the most selfish and disgusting thing I have ever witnessed.
Here’s one prime example of how I know Alicia is this type of person- the tiktok where she is listing off all of P’s and her other children’s diagnoses, she is essentially double dipping and using fancy words to describe mundane medical problems even “typical” children have. For example, she indicates P has a chromosomal anomaly and then goes on to list things like microcephaly, hypotonia, failure to thrive, low birthweight, attachment disorder, etc. For children with chromosomal anomalies these are simply the given. This is the equivalent of someone saying they have the flu, and have a fever, and diarrhea, and are vomiting, and have a headache, and the chills, and are very tired. She is intentionally trying to make her children’s conditions seem more than what they are. And why would she do that? ATTENTION. All the little “slips” she makes about her children’s challenges are absolutely intentional bc she wants you to feel bad for her and think of her as a martyr.

Hi everyone,
I have stage 4 Endo, excision surgery done in 2019, was fine until Feb 2023. It actually presented as upper GI issues, endoscopy was done some issues were found and confirmed however after procedure has led to consistent and chronic vomiting, 60lb weight loss, multiple er trips because of dehydration. Two admissions due to malnutrition, dehydration, low BP/hr and electrolyte imbalances. I have been on a slew of meds, GI was stumped couldn't figure it out, my last hospital admission she mentioned she couldn't figure out why I wasn't defecating even though I wasn't displaying typical signs of constipation. I mentioned something about my Endo, more like an off the cuff comment that led to a colonoscopy in December. That's when we discovered narrowing, no motility and difficulty threading a scope, even a pediatric scope. I had an MRI the next day and discovered that my Colon appears to be tethered to my right ovary, I had multiple and different cysts on each ovary. My health team believe my Endo returned and is the cause of my chronic vomiting. I am on prucalapride that is double the dose off label as per my GI doctor and trulance, so two gi motility medications and Orilissa because they believe that I could be at risk for further growth that may cut off blood supply to my colon. A total ovariohysterectomy has been decided but I am unfortunately at the mercy of NB broken medical system and the wait for surgery is going take a while. Despite two strong motility meds I either have painful diarrhea, do not defecate, or have pencil thin stools. The Orilissa is kicking my ass, I am 5 weeks in and my joints and my whole body hurt, headaches all day, shakiness, insomnia, painful abdomen. I will have hot flashes but only my core or thighs while my toes are cold and numb, finding it difficult to regulate my temperature, chills and a general overwhelming feeling of malaise. I am still vomiting and have not found relief despite Zofran and promethazine. I am struggling with moodiness, irritability, frustration and feeling crazy from the mood swings. If you have made it this far, thank-you I am just wondering if anyone has experienced something similar? Are you on the same medications? Does the pain and overall sense of malaise from Orilissa go away? I guess I'm just looking to see if someone can relate?

BACKSTORY:My husband and I live in a ground-level apartment with our corgi. Our neighbors (22M) and (25F), who are dating and have a very rocky relationship, live in the ground-level unit directly to the right of us and have a black lab. The four of us moved into the apartments on the same day, the first day the complex opened after being newly built. My husband and I didn't know our neighbors before moving in, so we met them for the very first time that day. Turns out we both picked ground-level because it makes life easier with a dog. Because we live in an apartment complex, it's a rule that all dog owners must clean up their dog's waste immediately after going poop on the property grounds. It's a poorly enforced rule but still a rule (and part of being a responsible dog owner?!?!). Since we moved in (a little over a year ago), the four of us have been the best of friends and our dogs adore each other. We’re almost like a little family that supports and cares for each other. There are many other dogs in the building and on the ground level. For the most part, there is only 1 other dog owner, who lives on the second floor with 2 dogs, that will let her dogs occasionally poop near our neighbor's outdoor space because we live next to one of the building entrances. I work from home so my dog lets me know when anyone comes and goes. From what I've witnessed when that owner takes her dogs to pee/poop at the entrance space near our neighbor's outdoor space, she ALWAYS cleans up after their poops.
(22M) Neighbor: He is very hot-tempered and does whatever his girlfriend tells him to do, which is everything because she controls/micromanages every aspect of his life. He works 50(ish) hrs a week to fund their household because she spends all her money on whatever she wants. His girlfriend delegates the chores and holds him responsible for cleaning the apartment, cooking all meals, folding + putting away laundry, dishes, taking out the trash and the dog- walking, feeding, taking it out to pee and cleaning up after it. So basically, he does everything and lets his gf think for himself.
(25F) Neighbor: She is a very blunt and confrontational person. She is very full of herself and thinks she is the closest thing to perfect. She's the first to cry victim to the smallest of inconveniences inflicted on her and call out all your shortcomings/flaws/wrongdoings. But when she's called out for her hypocritical actions, behaviors, shortcomings/flaws/wrongdoings, she finds a way to justify and/or victimize herself to frame you as the bad person. She works max 30hrs a week and is only responsible for grocery shopping and washing/drying the laundry. You'd think she was a single mom of 4 kids working 3 jobs just to make ends meet with how hard she makes her life seem. I could tell her that my husband died and she'd still find a way to make it about her and how her day/life is worse.
As younger individuals who don't have a ton of life experience, they act like they know everything, are entitled to everything, and are overall very immature and irresponsible.
Our Corgi: When our dog has to poop, we walk him back to the dog run behind the building to poop (he's a high-maintenance corgi who refuses to poop in his common play area I guess). Personally, I believe one of the ways you can judge a person's character is whether or not they promptly pick up their dog's poop in communal spaces and actually throw it away, aka just a standard for being a responsible and respectful dog owner. If you're the kind of dog owner who doesn't pick up their dog's poop, takes 2 weeks to pick it up or bags it and doesn't throw the bag away, then we probably aren't compatible. **Please acknowledge that my husband and I will NEVER claim to be perfect pet owners, but we always do our best** My husband and I will always pick up our dog's poop, regardless of the weather conditions or what kind of poop he takes. If it's diarrhea, we bag what we can and then dump water over it until it's diluted/rinsed away the best we can. We’ve only failed to clean up his poop 2-3 times because it was nighttime and couldn’t find it and cleaned it up the following morning.
Neighbors Dog: While their dog is very sweet, well-trained and obedient, she has a very sensitive tummy and frequently has diarrhea- which is unfortunate and nobody’s fault. Because we live on ground level, they just open their sliding door, hook her up to a 12ft leash (that stretches across the front of our sliding door and patio), shut the door and let her do her business. After a while, they let her back in, rarely looking out to see if she pooped and need to clean up. We have zero issues with this practice as long as they immediately pick up all the poops she takes in front of our patio area/space and walkway to the parking lot that’s directly infant of our space. It's not our problem if the front of their patio space and side areas are covered in turds because it doesn't directly affect us. If they want their outside space to look like a litter box and risk getting in trouble for violating the apartment's dog rules, then that's their prerogative, right? HOWEVER, we've had to address our neighbor's dog poop in our outdoor space MANY times since moving in. Sometimes it goes uncleaned on our side for so long that my husband and/or I end up stepping in it and/or cleaning it up ourselves. There is no reason we should be stepping in or even have to worry about stepping in their dog’s poop and we shouldn’t have to ask them to take standard responsibility of their dog. Until this most recent confrontation, our neighbors have always felt bad, apologized, and cleaned up their dog's poop(s) that’s in our space when we (my husband because I’m not confrontational) would call them out.
SITUATION:On Friday, March 15th, my husband stepped in a big pile of poop left by our neighbor's dog 3 steps in front of our patio on his walk out to his car. He failed to notify me about said pile of poop, so 30 minutes later when I walked out the patio door to get in my car, I also stepped in the poop. This was one of many other poop piles scattered across our outdoor space directly in front of our unit. Angry about what happened, I politely texted the boyfriend (neighbor) “Your dog has poop everywhere out front. I forgot about them this morning and my dog and I both stepped in her shit. You guys gotta clean it up... it's on the sidewalk, it's getting so out of hand.“ And he responded “We have been cleaning her poops lol. She’s had the runs for like 4 straight weeks lmao”… I didn’t respond because I was pissed. Their dog frequently has tummy issues, but I watched their dog take a perfectly solid poop the night before (that they didn’t pick up), so “4 straight weeks of diarrhea” seemed like an excuse. We live next to each other and our dogs play daily while we all supervise, I’m observant of their dogs pooping tendencies. Hard not to notice when her owners haven’t picked up any of her poops in WEEKS! I shared our text conversation with my husband. As the bigger person, my husband yet again went out that afternoon to bagged up ALL the poop that was piling up across both apartments and the entrance door space and dropped the poop filled bags on their patio (yes, he could have and maybe should have just thrown it away but he didn’t and I didn’t know he left it on their patio to do anything about it). Later that day when the girlfriend came home, she barged into our apartment and yelled at my husband for bagging all the poop up and dropping it on their patio. Saying “did you not see my boyfriend’s text? That’s not our dogs poop! They didn’t even look like hers!” and proceeded to warn him never to do it again. My husband tried to explain to her that he picked up poop that he and I literally watched their dog take the night before that they failed to clean up. She denied my husband’s statement claiming “they’ve been picking up her poop consistently so it’s not even possible for it to be their dogs poop”. I wasn’t there so she immediately texted me after yelling at him saying “this is the last thing she needed to deal with, that we can’t blame her for us stepping in another dogs poop and that my husband was disrespectful to her about the entire situation”. Irritated by the entire situation and frustrated with our neighbors lack our accountability, dog ownership responsibility and respect to us, I didn’t respond. I figured what’s done is done, let it go and hope we don’t have to repeat this situation. Considering they’ve never treated us like this when we’ve confronted them about this issue in the past.
3 days later on Monday, March 18th, I was getting ready that morning and watched their dog take a big diarrhea poop 3-4ft in front of our patio. I also watched the bf see the dog poop and shortly after left for work without picking it up. My husband and I were PISSED. We literally JUST addressed this with them 3 days ago!! We left the poop and decided to give them grace. Maybe he was running late and forgot? But when the gf got home from work first and DIDN’T clean it up, my husband was pissed. I was on my way home and couldn’t get ahold of my husband so I asked our neighbor (the gf) to let him know that he needed to call me so I could pick up dinner since he wasn’t answering. So she went over to our apartment to tell my husband to call me. My husband commented on the poop when she spoke with him and she got so angry. After that interaction she texted me “Not going to lie, we are not a fan of the David we have seen this past week. Idk what's up but he needs to put his kindness and chill vibes back on” because she didn’t like my husband calling her out on the poop or how he went about the situation. As if we aren’t entitled to be upset about the situation. When her bf got home she made him clean it up, because “that’s his responsibility” according to her.When I got home I immediately went over to their apartment to confront them about their BS. The fact that she had the audacity to attack my husbands character and invalidate our rightfully expressed frustration about them not picking up THEIR DOGS POOP after we’ve accidentally stepped in it multiple times in less than a week sent me into a rage. But as my grandpa says, “you attract more bees with honey”. So I knocked and asked if it was an appropriate time for them to talk about the dog poop situation- nobody likes to have an emotionally charged conversation when they’re not ready. Trying not to be accusative, I expressed that I felt they didn’t respect us enough to think that we deserve to live in a clean space that doesn’t have someone else’s dog poop littered across the space. That we don’t feel they care enough to clean up immediately after their dog poops on our side so we don’t step in it. Because why would they willingly leave poop in our outdoor space knowing we could possibly step in it and not notify us about it to prevent us from stepping in it if they respect us? Friends don’t let friends step in their dogs poop or let their dog poop in their friend's yard and not pick it up?? She got defensive and tried to justify/excuse everything because we were going about the situation in a disrespectful manner…? Even if we were disrespectful, does that still justify/excuse you from not picking up after your dog, especially when your FRIENDS keep stepping in it?? Her bf chimed in claiming that he intentionally left it because A) he was late for work and forgot B) it was diarrhea so he left it to freeze so clean up would be easier. While we live in MN and it is winter, the temp was like 45 degrees that Monday morning… last I checked it has to be 32 degrees or colder to freeze lol. All I did was explain how their lack of respect, accountability and responsibility for not picking up their dogs poop in front of OUR apartment patio and not seeing an issue with us stepping in poop that we factually know was their dogs poop frustrated my husband and me. They ignored/disregarded everything I was saying and continued to argue/justify/excuse their actions because of our “disrespect and lack of understanding for how hard their life is”. So I announced that I was done having the conversation because of how unproductive it was and left. Since that argument, we haven’t spoken to our neighbors and every brief encounter we’ve had with them has been rude and cold on their end.
Today, March 23rd, I decided to text her about making amends saying “We miss you guys. We'd really like to talk things through and work things out if you guys want that also”. She responded “We would really like to work things out also but we were hurt by how both of you decided to handle this issue and we need this weekend to relax on our own. I've been sick and quite honestly neither of us are in the mental space to talk with you guys right now. I'll reach out next week when we have some time and are feeling up to it, I appreciate your understanding - we're not trying to be cold, it just really hurt”… are you F-ing kidding me?? Am I missing something?? How is she making themselves the victims in this situation?! They neglected to clean up after their dog pooped in our outdoor space, we stepped in their dogs poop, called them out on it and somehow she’s making us out to be the villains?!
Is this friendship worth saving? I’m so sad and hurt that someone I deemed to be my friend could treat me like this. Do we try to make amends or is it time to cut ties with our friends?

BACKSTORY:My husband and I live in a ground-level apartment with our corgi. Our neighbors (22M) and (25F), who are dating and have a very rocky relationship, live in the ground-level unit directly to the right of us and have a black lab. The four of us moved into the apartments on the same day, the first day the complex opened after being newly built. My husband and I didn't know our neighbors before moving in, so we met them for the very first time that day. Turns out we both picked ground-level because it makes life easier with a dog. Because we live in an apartment complex, it's a rule that all dog owners must clean up their dog's waste immediately after going poop on the property grounds. It's a poorly enforced rule but still a rule (and part of being a responsible dog owner?!?!). Since we moved in (a little over a year ago), the four of us have been the best of friends and our dogs adore each other. We’re almost like a little family that supports and cares for each other. There are many other dogs in the building and on the ground level. For the most part, there is only 1 other dog owner, who lives on the second floor with 2 dogs, that will let her dogs occasionally poop near our neighbor's outdoor space because we live next to one of the building entrances. I work from home so my dog lets me know when anyone comes and goes. From what I've witnessed when that owner takes her dogs to pee/poop at the entrance space near our neighbor's outdoor space, she ALWAYS cleans up after their poops.
(22M) Neighbor: He is very hot-tempered and does whatever his girlfriend tells him to do, which is everything because she controls/micromanages every aspect of his life. He works 50(ish) hrs a week to fund their household because she spends all her money on whatever she wants. His girlfriend delegates the chores and holds him responsible for cleaning the apartment, cooking all meals, folding + putting away laundry, dishes, taking out the trash and the dog- walking, feeding, taking it out to pee and cleaning up after it. So basically, he does everything and lets his gf think for himself.
(25F) Neighbor: She is a very blunt and confrontational person. She is very full of herself and thinks she is the closest thing to perfect. She's the first to cry victim to the smallest of inconveniences inflicted on her and call out all your shortcomings/flaws/wrongdoings. But when she's called out for her hypocritical actions, behaviors, shortcomings/flaws/wrongdoings, she finds a way to justify and/or victimize herself to frame you as the bad person. She works max 30hrs a week and is only responsible for grocery shopping and washing/drying the laundry. You'd think she was a single mom of 4 kids working 3 jobs just to make ends meet with how hard she makes her life seem. I could tell her that my husband died and she'd still find a way to make it about her and how her day/life is worse.
As younger individuals who don't have a ton of life experience, they act like they know everything, are entitled to everything, and are overall very immature and irresponsible.
Our Corgi: When our dog has to poop, we walk him back to the dog run behind the building to poop (he's a high-maintenance corgi who refuses to poop in his common play area I guess). Personally, I believe one of the ways you can judge a person's character is whether or not they promptly pick up their dog's poop in communal spaces and actually throw it away, aka just a standard for being a responsible and respectful dog owner. If you're the kind of dog owner who doesn't pick up their dog's poop, takes 2 weeks to pick it up or bags it and doesn't throw the bag away, then we probably aren't compatible. **Please acknowledge that my husband and I will NEVER claim to be perfect pet owners, but we always do our best** My husband and I will always pick up our dog's poop, regardless of the weather conditions or what kind of poop he takes. If it's diarrhea, we bag what we can and then dump water over it until it's diluted/rinsed away the best we can. We’ve only failed to clean up his poop 2-3 times because it was nighttime and couldn’t find it and cleaned it up the following morning.
Neighbors Dog: While their dog is very sweet, well-trained and obedient, she has a very sensitive tummy and frequently has diarrhea- which is unfortunate and nobody’s fault. Because we live on ground level, they just open their sliding door, hook her up to a 12ft leash (that stretches across the front of our sliding door and patio), shut the door and let her do her business. After a while, they let her back in, rarely looking out to see if she pooped and need to clean up. We have zero issues with this practice as long as they immediately pick up all the poops she takes in front of our patio area/space and walkway to the parking lot that’s directly infant of our space. It's not our problem if the front of their patio space and side areas are covered in turds because it doesn't directly affect us. If they want their outside space to look like a litter box and risk getting in trouble for violating the apartment's dog rules, then that's their prerogative, right? HOWEVER, we've had to address our neighbor's dog poop in our outdoor space MANY times since moving in. Sometimes it goes uncleaned on our side for so long that my husband and/or I end up stepping in it and/or cleaning it up ourselves. There is no reason we should be stepping in or even have to worry about stepping in their dog’s poop and we shouldn’t have to ask them to take standard responsibility of their dog. Until this most recent confrontation, our neighbors have always felt bad, apologized, and cleaned up their dog's poop(s) that’s in our space when we (my husband because I’m not confrontational) would call them out.
SITUATION:On Friday, March 15th, my husband stepped in a big pile of poop left by our neighbor's dog 3 steps in front of our patio on his walk out to his car. He failed to notify me about said pile of poop, so 30 minutes later when I walked out the patio door to get in my car, I also stepped in the poop. This was one of many other poop piles scattered across our outdoor space directly in front of our unit. Angry about what happened, I politely texted the boyfriend (neighbor) “Your dog has poop everywhere out front. I forgot about them this morning and my dog and I both stepped in her shit. You guys gotta clean it up... it's on the sidewalk, it's getting so out of hand.“ And he responded “We have been cleaning her poops lol. She’s had the runs for like 4 straight weeks lmao”… I didn’t respond because I was pissed. Their dog frequently has tummy issues, but I watched their dog take a perfectly solid poop the night before (that they didn’t pick up), so “4 straight weeks of diarrhea” seemed like an excuse. We live next to each other and our dogs play daily while we all supervise, I’m observant of their dogs pooping tendencies. Hard not to notice when her owners haven’t picked up any of her poops in WEEKS! I shared our text conversation with my husband. As the bigger person, my husband yet again went out that afternoon to bagged up ALL the poop that was piling up across both apartments and the entrance door space and dropped the poop filled bags on their patio (yes, he could have and maybe should have just thrown it away but he didn’t and I didn’t know he left it on their patio to do anything about it). Later that day when the girlfriend came home, she barged into our apartment and yelled at my husband for bagging all the poop up and dropping it on their patio. Saying “did you not see my boyfriend’s text? That’s not our dogs poop! They didn’t even look like hers!” and proceeded to warn him never to do it again. My husband tried to explain to her that he picked up poop that he and I literally watched their dog take the night before that they failed to clean up. She denied my husband’s statement claiming “they’ve been picking up her poop consistently so it’s not even possible for it to be their dogs poop”. I wasn’t there so she immediately texted me after yelling at him saying “this is the last thing she needed to deal with, that we can’t blame her for us stepping in another dogs poop and that my husband was disrespectful to her about the entire situation”. Irritated by the entire situation and frustrated with our neighbors lack our accountability, dog ownership responsibility and respect to us, I didn’t respond. I figured what’s done is done, let it go and hope we don’t have to repeat this situation. Considering they’ve never treated us like this when we’ve confronted them about this issue in the past.
3 days later on Monday, March 18th, I was getting ready that morning and watched their dog take a big diarrhea poop 3-4ft in front of our patio. I also watched the bf see the dog poop and shortly after left for work without picking it up. My husband and I were PISSED. We literally JUST addressed this with them 3 days ago!! We left the poop and decided to give them grace. Maybe he was running late and forgot? But when the gf got home from work first and DIDN’T clean it up, my husband was pissed. I was on my way home and couldn’t get ahold of my husband so I asked our neighbor (the gf) to let him know that he needed to call me so I could pick up dinner since he wasn’t answering. So she went over to our apartment to tell my husband to call me. My husband commented on the poop when she spoke with him and she got so angry. After that interaction she texted me “Not going to lie, we are not a fan of the David we have seen this past week. Idk what's up but he needs to put his kindness and chill vibes back on” because she didn’t like my husband calling her out on the poop or how he went about the situation. As if we aren’t entitled to be upset about the situation. When her bf got home she made him clean it up, because “that’s his responsibility” according to her.When I got home I immediately went over to their apartment to confront them about their BS. The fact that she had the audacity to attack my husbands character and invalidate our rightfully expressed frustration about them not picking up THEIR DOGS POOP after we’ve accidentally stepped in it multiple times in less than a week sent me into a rage. But as my grandpa says, “you attract more bees with honey”. So I knocked and asked if it was an appropriate time for them to talk about the dog poop situation- nobody likes to have an emotionally charged conversation when they’re not ready. Trying not to be accusative, I expressed that I felt they didn’t respect us enough to think that we deserve to live in a clean space that doesn’t have someone else’s dog poop littered across the space. That we don’t feel they care enough to clean up immediately after their dog poops on our side so we don’t step in it. Because why would they willingly leave poop in our outdoor space knowing we could possibly step in it and not notify us about it to prevent us from stepping in it if they respect us? Friends don’t let friends step in their dogs poop or let their dog poop in their friend's yard and not pick it up?? She got defensive and tried to justify/excuse everything because we were going about the situation in a disrespectful manner…? Even if we were disrespectful, does that still justify/excuse you from not picking up after your dog, especially when your FRIENDS keep stepping in it?? Her bf chimed in claiming that he intentionally left it because A) he was late for work and forgot B) it was diarrhea so he left it to freeze so clean up would be easier. While we live in MN and it is winter, the temp was like 45 degrees that Monday morning… last I checked it has to be 32 degrees or colder to freeze lol. All I did was explain how their lack of respect, accountability and responsibility for not picking up their dogs poop in front of OUR apartment patio and not seeing an issue with us stepping in poop that we factually know was their dogs poop frustrated my husband and me. They ignored/disregarded everything I was saying and continued to argue/justify/excuse their actions because of our “disrespect and lack of understanding for how hard their life is”. So I announced that I was done having the conversation because of how unproductive it was and left. Since that argument, we haven’t spoken to our neighbors and every brief encounter we’ve had with them has been rude and cold on their end.
Today, March 23rd, I decided to text her about making amends saying “We miss you guys. We'd really like to talk things through and work things out if you guys want that also”. She responded “We would really like to work things out also but we were hurt by how both of you decided to handle this issue and we need this weekend to relax on our own. I've been sick and quite honestly neither of us are in the mental space to talk with you guys right now. I'll reach out next week when we have some time and are feeling up to it, I appreciate your understanding - we're not trying to be cold, it just really hurt”… are you F-ing kidding me?? Am I missing something?? How is she making themselves the victims in this situation?! They neglected to clean up after their dog pooped in our outdoor space, we stepped in their dogs poop, called them out on it and somehow she’s making us out to be the villains?!
Is this friendship worth saving? I’m so sad and hurt that someone I deemed to be my friend could treat me like this. Do we try to make amends or is it time to cut ties with our friends?

My bf and I are on a spring break trip right now with some friends from his frat. Btw our ages are both a year below what’s in the title because he’s found my reddit posts before, so I was trying to make it harder for him to find this if he did search for a post.
We’ve been at the beach since Monday and our routine has essentially been going to the beach during the day and the bars at night. All of this drinking must’ve caught up with me, because I have been battling diarrhea this whole day but especially while I was getting ready/beginning drinking. I started getting concerned that maybe I shouldn’t be drinking, so I googled it and everything was telling me to avoid drinking. I had fully gotten ready, so I was intending to go out tonight. However, I began thinking about if I even felt good enough to go out. I also didn’t want to be stuck in a situation where I had to go to the bathroom at the bar or need to leave the bar and my bf get mad at me for wanting to leave earlier than everyone else.
I texted him what was up and he basically told me I was chilling and that he’s had diarrhea before and to “trust.” He eventually came into our room and started basically begging me to go because it would be embarrassing for him if I didn’t go and he wouldn’t have any fun. I pointed out how he was only caring about himself and being selfish by saying that and he told me I was being selfish by not going out. I said “do you think I wanted to feel like this? I obviously wanted to go out or I wouldn’t have gotten ready.” And I just tried to get him to understand that I obviously never intended to feel this way and have to stay home. He just kept responding “okay” in an angry tone when I was pointing out how unreasonable he was being. I told him to just leave if he was going to talk to me like that. He got up to go to the bathroom or something and I started to cry. He came over eventually and gave me a hug ?? Like that was gonna make me forgive and forget anything he just said..
He then left and went out to the main area where everyone else has been pregaming for the last couple hours. He texted me asking if I was ok I said sure he said are you mad ? I said yeah. He said “do you want me to not go?” I said “just go” (because I knew that’s the answer he wanted and I honestly have no desire to see him right now).
We’ve been dating for almost two years so I don’t know why he is acting this way. I would like to think that someone who claims to love me would consider my wellbeing over their ability to have fun, but what do you guys think? I obviously love him but I’m hurt by his selfishness and seeming lack of concern for me.

Hi all. I’ll start with my info first , then I’ll give you the before, during, and my current after abortion.
My info: I’m 23 y/o , pregnant from a one night stand . No real money to my name, and my family is religious wouldn’t be supportive. I’m still in school finishing up , and it’s expensive for me and my cats let alone a child. Dad would be going away to medical residency in LA , and I’d move back home to NY to work, it was not going to work. I had my abortion at 7 weeks on the dot, I found out at around 3 1/2 weeks. For reference, you need to do your weeks as the first date of your last period and count forward, so usually ovulation plus two weeks.
My before: I had a TOUGH time . I was so sad and depressed, crying and sobbing randomly. And I couldn’t really tell anyone. I was nauseous ALL DAY. And no appetite. If get bloated at times where it would look I had a small belly and it was so hard to get up from bed I was so fatigued . My heart rate was very fast at times cause I was dehydrated too. Pretty much from the second I found out I knew I couldn’t have the baby, and that broke my heart. I’ve always wanted to be a mom and it felt like I was already failing at one. I cried and cried but I knew it was the most selfless right choice for me and her ( thinking it was her because of all the symptoms I had ). Dad was supportive, sent me half the money and checks on me every few days which is very nice considering this was a guy I met once, just for sex, on a day I happened to be ovulating and was on a new birth control ten days prior. I know my body well and was peeing more often and just felt overall so fatigued and off , so I took a pregnancy test and then 4 more. All positive .
My during: I took the mifepristone at the planned parenthood office, one week after my ultrasound appt. My ultrasound appt was tough for me and I was tearing and crying all through it. I’m in healthcare so I know how everything works and I know why certain changes happen in my body during the pregnancy but it didn’t make anything any easier, if anything it made it harder. Everyone I had cater to me during the ultrasound appointment ( the receptionist, the doctor, the educator, the , the med student ) were all super nice and patient, however that wasn’t the case for the pill appt. The receptionist and educator were nice but the doctor was a little too cold for my liking. I know he does this all day everyday, but for me this was the first time and it was hard. He told me to stick my hand out and then popped the pill out the package and said “ ok now go on, take it “. Is if this magic pill wasn’t about to stop my pregnancy from continuing, and was going to be the end all. Nonetheless I did as told, and took the pill then cried on the way back to class and home . The next day was BRUTAL . I was set to take the misoprostol at 11:30 AM, but didn’t want to take it without the nausea medication he sent to the pharmacy, the phenegam . I was already throwing up the night before but it wasn’t too bad. So I took my nausea medication , waited 30 min. Threw up at the hour mark. Called the nurse on call, she said it was fine and to take ibuprofen , wait 30 min , take the miso, wait 30 min, then take the phengram again. That’s what I fid. Now the phengram is also a sedative, so I knocked out after having a sleeve of saltines ( my only meal of the day). The pain woke me up. I was moaning and groaning and felt like I needed to use the bathroom. Once I got to the bathroom, all hell broke loose. Now I have a very high pain tolerance, and I’ve been told this by professionals. I also have PCOS and am no stranger to painful periods. I was SCREAMING on the bathroom floor in pain, curled into a ball. Chills, fever, diarrhea, vomitting and bleeding. For 10-15 min straight. The contractions were so strong I thought I was going to have to drive myself to the hospital in tears. I managed to crawl back into my bed and remembered my nursing training, and breathed. I focused on my breathing and put my heating pad on. Played some music and breathed in and out until I fell asleep. Once I woke up my friend was next to me in bed, and I was still drowsy from the meds and still in pain but manageable. I then got up, and when I did blood streamed down my legs and all the way to the bathroom. When I sat down the clots fell and fell, and the biggest one, and I knew I had passed the pregnancy. I stayed in silence and examined it and stared in disbelief at the blood streaming down my legs and the clot that was my baby in my hands. I cleaned up the bathroom and myself, and crawled back into bed. The pain has been calmer and more manageable, nothing like the first 10-15 min.
My after: This was all two days ago. I’m in a state of shock, and the pain that I felt still has me in disbelief. I don’t think I regret it because I couldn’t have a child rn. But I feel very numb, empty , alone and confused. Nothing really matters to me anymore and lots of things feel insignificant to me now. I just want to lay in bed and stare at the ceiling but even that doesn’t seem to have any depth. The bleeding has subsided significantly and it’s just like a normal period now, with not many clots. I’m taking it one day at a time. Today I took a shower and cooked, yesterday I did laundry , tomorrow I will go to the supermarket for the first time in three weeks . Overall, I’m in a state of shock. But I know I was looking for a post similar to this one for a while and couldn’t find one. I hope you can use this and find some comfort or guidance in my experience. You got this, give yourself some grace.

Continuing our survey of vintage news articles confirming that the early media coverage of the Soka Gakkai was "almost entirely negative", here comes one from 1970!
Archive copy
News and Record
Greensboro, North Carolina · Sunday, September 13, 1970 · Page 68
Lester Kinsolving

'Ridgepole of Japan'

Mt. Fujiyama, Japan ⏤At the foot of this historically sacred mountain are six unpainted concrete three-storied, modernistic, barracks-like buildings which look like a penitentiary designed by Frank Lloyd Wright.
Each of these buildings has a large yellow number. And the bleak atmosphere of this building compound is further chilled by the sound of rapid and frenzied chantings which reverberate from within each of the buildings: "NAM-MYOHO RENGE-KYO! NAM-MYHO [sic] RENGE KYO! ..."
Inside each building, three to four hundred teen and college age boys in white shirts and trousers kneel in front of an altar, roll prayer beads in their hands and shout this chant⏤at least three thousand times per day.
This chant (meaning "Devotion to the wondrous law of life: cause and effect") is hardly meditative in the traditional sense ⏤ although the boys are assured that such chantings will ensure perfect health and a firm bank account. To witness the volume, rapidity and frenzied, self-hypnotic delivery in this chanting and to see the countenances of the young chanters, inevitably recalls the ecstatic countenances of other large groups of young people who once shouted "Banzai!", "Sieg Heil!" or "Duce! Duce!"
Academics
These buildings are part of the international headquarters of a ferociously militant religio-political organization called Soka Gakkai ("Value-creating Academic Society"). In just two decades this organization has grown from 5,000 to more than 11 million members.
Soka Gakkai is technically a Buddhist layman's organization. But it thoroughly dominates its parent religion, a Buddhist sect called Nichiren Shoshu.
Nicheren [sic] was a 13th century Buddhist priest who (A) fancied himself greater than the original Buddha, Gautama Siddartha [sic]. (B) Severely denounced existing Buddhist sects as traitors and devils (C) Was exiled after warning the government that "I am the ridgepole of Japan ⏤ to lose me would mean felling the pillar of the country" (D) In spite of rumored power to predict the future and to effect miracles, died at age 60 ⏤ of chronic diarrhea.
His following persisted however, until in 1946 it was taken over by an appropriately intolerant thug named Josei Toda. "We must consider all religions our enemy and we must destroy them," said Toda, leading the sect's younger followers into widespread attacks upon other Buddhist sects, Christian churches and many of the more than 100 new religions which have sprung up in Japan since the end of World War II.
On April 27, 1952, Toda and 4,000 young Sokas took over the principal Nicheren [sic] temple at Fujiyama, by assaulting the aged priest Jimon Ogawawara [sic]. In the vanguard of these Buddhist storm troopers was Diasuke [sic] Ikeda, who has succeeded Toda as president.
Under Ikeda, the organization has:

• Created its own political party, Komeito, which has since 1964 won 71 seats in Japan's Parliament (Diet) and is presently the third largest party in Japan.
  
• Built up a publications empire including the daily Seikyo Shimbun, which has a circulation (3.5 million) which is larger than any newspaper in the U.S. (This and other publications bring in "about $100 million annually, so that only a few of our well-to-do members are asked to contribute," according to Tomiya Akiyama, chief of the organization's Foreign Relations Bureau.)
  
• Expanded to 11 million members, through the extremely aggressive conversion technique known as Shakabuku [sic] ("Break and subdue") in which potential converts are hounded, threatened and brainwashed in what the Japanese Ministry of Justice has described as "a semi-gangster manner, using a military organization."
  

If the Soka Gakkai is ever able, through its awesome economic power and highly disciplined religio-political structure, to win a majority of seats in the Diet, the consequences to the Orient, as well as to the world, could be great.
And the organization by no means confines its conversion objectives to Japan. It points out that Soka Gakkai among other things "is the fastest growing religion in America."
On March 8, the New York Times reported that the number of Soka Gakkai members in the United States amounted to more than 200,000.
Just the first two (short) paragraphs tell you everything you need to know about what the reporter is seeing when he looks at the Soka Gakkai - and it is extremely ugly.
This is simply another of those data points that confirms that, as quoted here:

As it grew, Soka Gakkai elicited a near-universal negative reaction from its religious and political opponents.

And:

The Soka Gakkai has been the subject of an almost completely unfavorable press, both in Japan and in the United States.

The report goes on to describe the Soka Gakkai in terms such as "semi-gangster" and "military", describes the buildings it has donated to the Nichiren Shoshu Head Temple Taisekiji as looking like "a penitentiary" (+ bleak and chilling), and compares a group of young men and boys variously - to the Pacific War Japanese militarists, the Nazis, and Mussolini's Fascists. He notes that the supposedly "great" Nichiren, the 13th century feudal Japanese founder, despite his supposed powers of prophecy and medical healing ("I prolonged my mother's life by 4 years"), died at just age 60, "of chronic diarrhea". Oooh, that's gotta BURN!
GOOD TIMES, in other words!
As it turned out, Nichiren's inheritor (we can just forget all about Maki"WHO?"chi, who actually had nothing to do with the Soka Gakkai organization as launched post-WWII by→) Josei Toda is described as "an appropriately intolerant thug", who in fact died even earlier than Nichiren - at just 58 from the "effects" of his chronic alcoholism and chain smoking!
That "actual proof" bit sure seems to bite these fanatics in the butt a LOT!
The reporter notes the "Ogasawara Incident" in which Soka Gakkai thugs - whom he describes as "storm troopers" many years before the Star Wars version, at which point such a description ONLY brought to mind the Nazi SS - attacked an elderly priest (in his 80s) en masse. This was in fact Toda's FIRST official action after becoming President of the Soka Gakkai! The numbers are a little screwy - the "4,000" notes the number of Soka Gakkai members who went to Taiseki-ji for a routine pilgrimage; Ikeda was "in the vanguard" of a "shock force" of 47 young men (to invoke a specific revenge attack from Japan's feudal history) sent specifically to attack Rev. Ogasawara. In fact, Toda went with them - and admitted to hitting the old priest "twice"!
It's uncommon to find Ogasawara named in Western reports, in my experience, so that's another interesting feature of this report - the "Ogasawara Incident" was a HUGE crisis for the Soka Gakkai at the time and it had lingering consequences in the Japanese populace's view of the Soka Gakkai as a dangerous, violent organization.
Considering this shameful episode in tandem with the report that "potential converts are hounded, threatened and brainwashed in what the Japanese Ministry of Justice has described as 'a semi-gangster manner, using a military organization'", it lends context to the fact that Toda was hauled into the police station and required to sign a statement that his followers would cease their violence and intimidation! That incident took place the very same year as the Toda-directed attack on the elderly Rev. Ogasawara (1952).

"We must consider all religions our enemy and we must destroy them," said Toda, leading the sect's younger followers into widespread attacks upon other Buddhist sects, Christian churches and many of the more than 100 new religions which have sprung up in Japan since the end of World War II.

This is well documented - during Toda's presidency, the Soka Gakkai put together a "Shakubuku Manual" (edited by none other than Daisaku Ikeda) which included specific argument points to use against the other religions they were attacking. This attack mentality persisted into Ikeda's presidency, as you can see here and here. Nichiren was absolutely diametrically opposed to the modern popularized concept of "interfaith", and at least in its early decades, the Soka Gakkai fully embraced COMPLETE intolerance - and this persists to this day, albeit somewhat clandestinely (privately). The SGI does not ADVERTISE their intolerance, is what I'm getting at, though it remains still very much in play:

There is still a "Here's why EVERYBODY should hate Nichiren Shoshu" section in every SGI "study exam" to this day. Source

Feel free to check for yourselves!
About that "publications empire", I've got a source somewhere from, like, the 1960s, where Ikeda is boasting that Soka Gakkai NEVER asks contributions from the Soka Gakkai members (we all know the SGI constantly has its begging hand out now). BUT - big "but", big Ikeda-sized "but" - ALL the members, then AND now, WERE AND ARE pressured to "subscribe" to their periodicals and buy other publications! "Oh, that's NOT a 'donation'!" the Ikeda cultists will sneer with their best outrage-faces, but let's face it - it amounts to DUES. In the past, members were pressured to carry MULTIPLE subscriptions - in 2014, there was even a year-long "campaign" to increase the number of subscriptions for SGI-USA from 35,000 to 50,000! In Japan, elderly Soka Gakkai members have starved to death because they were spending so much of their severely limited income on subscriptions that there wasn't enough left over to buy food with!
The Ikeda cult didn't care. Only MONEY matters.
Finally, that "200,000 Soka Gakkai members in the USA" in 1970 - that's a crock. The then-General Director of the Soka Gakkai organization in the US, Mr. George M. Williams (né Masayasu Sadanaga), had gotten a degree in political science; he KNEW the importance of presenting the most eye-popping content to the media, which would then predictably serve up FREE PUBLICITY!! So the membership numbers in the US were routinely exaggerated, and exaggerated spectacularly. Imagine - "200,000" members in 1970, "500,000" members in the late 1980s?? What HAPPENED to all of them? At this point, the aging, graying, dying SGI-USA has at most 30,000 active members (90% Baby Boom generation or older) and possibly as few as 5,000 or even just 3,000! GREAT "kosen-rufu" success, amirite?? What a LEGACY for Dead Ikeda the Corpse Mentor!
All in all, a very enjoyable vintage news report!

Hi IBD, sorry for what is a long one, posting here to get some thoughts and maybe some peace of mind. M34 here, 5’11”, 237, good overall health, not pre-diabetic, good cholesterol numbers, BP typically 130/80. I’ve been controlling my diet to try and lose some weight, cut out sugar and alcohol, and upped my vitamin B12 and D3 because I was deficient. I also had a copper deficiency I’m working on. I’ve lost quite a bit of weight, 252 in late December, down to 237 now. The weight loss does concern me a little, I haven’t been trying very hard.
About 9-10 months ago, I started to have persistent diarrhea. I wasn’t going multiple times a day, but when I did, it was typically sludge (sometimes the front was slightly harder, and the back turned to sludge). I would have a solid movement maybe once every week. I’ve always had weird stomach things like gurgling noises. I also drink lots of coffee, so I chalked it up to stress of work, coffee, IBS, etc.
Fast forward, Saturday, Feb 24, I start to feel a tightness in the RUQ about an inch below my rib cage. I try to stretch it by flexing my side, doesn’t help. Sunday, Feb 25, it turns to intermittent pain (5/10 level). I go to urgent care, they say it’s a muscle strain. Monday, Feb 26, the pain gets worse, again, localized to my RUQ. Sometimes the pain starts lower, or drifts left, but is consistently in the same spot. In addition, I have a low grade fever and feel clammy (99.9).
I go to the ER Monday night, they perform an ultrasound, bloodwork, everything is normal with kidneys, gallbladder, etc., and I’m sent home. I do a primary care visit Wednesday as follow up, he reviews my history of bloodwork, does a physical exam, identifies no blockages, no edema, etc. He recommends a gastrointestinal specialist and a colonoscopy. At this point, I’m not hungry at all, can barely eat, eating food makes me feel a little queasy and I have zero appetite. Pain is becoming more constant.
Thursday night, I’m starting to feel more chills at night and have what I think is a night sweat. Slightly elevated temperature (99.8). I go into the ER this morning, Friday, with 7/10 intermittent pain. I was able to have a bowel movement, it was sludge, no visible blood. They do a full blood work up including CBC with differential, metabolic, lipase, sedimentation and C-reactive protein. All bloodwork comes back good, “You have the best bloodwork in the ER today.”
They also do a CT with contrast, and here’s where my questions start.
They note something on my kidney, and a fatty liver, neither of which concern me. They do note that my descending colon has a thickening. What does concern me is the colon. My questions are, why do I have pain in my RUQ, but the CT found thickening on the left? Could this be colitis or similar? I find it odd I’m having an elevated temperature and chills.
I have a GI appointment this coming Tuesday, the ER doc said I need a colonoscopy. He said he thought it was most likely a colitis or infection given my age and symptoms, but said there’s a potential it’s cancer. I specifically asked if my bloodwork showed anemia, and he said no.
As of now, I’m on Ciproflaxin and another antibiotic, as well as a liquid only diet for the next 2-3 days to give my colon a rest.
Thanks for any thoughts, advice on what to try or questions for my GI, etc.
“IMPRESSION:
1.Mild apparent thickening of the descending colon can be due to underdistention or mild colitis.
2.Left renal hypodense lesion measures higher than simple fluid attenuation, possibly a hemorrhagic cyst or small hypoenhancing lesion. Further evaluation with MRI abdomen suggested.
3.Hepatic steatosis”