Sorry for all the grammar and spelling mistakes. English is my second language.
I never thought that I would live in America one day. My dad was working in Saudi Arabia at one of the colleges and he was one of the teachers. It was the time of Ramadan. My dad came back home for vacation.( 2017)
So around April 2017 I took Greek classes because if you want citizenship in Greece, you need to speak , write and read fluently.
Ramadan was in July that year when my dad came back home for vacation. My dad wanted to know if I’m still pursuing my dream to go to Cyprus. I told him that I started losing hope the last three months because it is super difficult to learn a language that the alphabet is not the same in your alphabet.
My dad gave me a phone number of the company that’s here in the United States. His friend from Florida knows them very well. They are a very known recruiters company . He said I’m a try this company and see what happens.
I called them on Monday and they told me that they have one job opportunity open so I applied immediately. The next week Thursday I heard I got the job . The next week Thursday I was flying to America.
I had literally no idea where I was going. All that I knew is that I was going to Chicago and one of my managers will pick me up there.
Sometimes I don’t know if I was very bold or stupid but I did it .
Follow for Part 3.

One of the central tenants of the Protestant reformation, including that of the English Reformation, was the doctrine of sola fide and the idea that via forensic justification, a sinner's faith was all that was needed for Christ's redemption by taking on their sins as his own, with no dependency on the words or mortal deeds of the adherent.
It seems to me that the lay Catholic would fall into this "saved" category. I understand why Catholic clergy and nobility were viewed and persecuted as heretics on both religious and political grounds - they were seen as culpable for spreading false doctrine regarding salvation, corruption, superstition, papacy, and going against the monarch/head of the Church. People who were outspoken against the monarch and their reforms being labeled heretics also makes sense for the same reasoning.
What I am wondering about is if the early English reformers thought "sola fide" applied to the average Catholic who kept their head down and didn't cause trouble? I am currently reading a biography of Lady Jane Gray, and one thing that comes up a lot in her correspondences is the concern she and her fellow Protestants had for friends of theirs who remained or had reverted back to Catholicism. This concern also extended to less radical reformers, who rejected Catholic authority but still kept to some of their old traditions or icons. This concern seemed just as great for those who lived quiet, private lives, and were in no way flaunting or spreading their beliefs.
What interested me was that they wasn't just offended on religious grounds, or contemptuous of what they saw as superstition; most of all they feared for the souls of these wayward Christians, did not seem to believe sola fide applied to them, and lamented the damnation of their souls. Was the belief of early English reformers that someone had to actually believe in the doctrine of sola fide in order for it to apply to them, and thus did not extend to Catholic adherents? If that was the case, did they apply that to people alive prior to the reformation - and believe that almost all Christians historically were damned?

Relatively recently, during the [now stopped] couple therapy, we collectively came to realization that I have serious abandonment issues/insecurity, unhealthy attachment "habit", and codependency with a possible narcissistic spouse.
I lost my mother (F33) to liver cancer when I was 11.5 years old. I am still processing the scale of the detrimental effect of early loss of my favorite parent, rejection from girls at school, and runaway bride back in 2012... The more I live, the more I feel stuck in little boys' mind with aging body surrounded by huge hostile World. (Of course, that is objectively not precise, but that how it feels).
Lately, I've been feeling really bad inside. First, I was laid off in February and am still looking for a job, while my morale is slowly degrading. Second, my wife and I have been getting less and less intimate physically, which is one of my main ways to connect and bond. Keeping initiating and getting rejected is not helping my mental state in any way and only adds to undermined morale and confidence... So I finally decided to stop fucking "simp"ing and deal with my shit by myself. As a Christian, I should not be considering relationships "on the side" ("easy way"), the idea of which I am currently battling. The hard way is to become less dependent on sex and relationships as a way to fuel happiness and/or satisfaction. To do that, I need to overcome the abandonment issues, I think.
My question is what are the effective ways to fight the abandonment issues and get independence of ghosts of the past and illusions of the present? I did try individual therapy to no avail. Had both female and male therapist, and couldn't really bond with either well enough to work on my issues. The female was not giving me concrete enough directions or advice or anything of that kind. The male was blatantly half-competent, as he was suggesting unproven practices and used unscientific, misleading terminology. All of my sessions were remote via YasnoLive platform. I chose it because of its affordability, but more importantly, for native Russian speaking providers (while my English is OK, it's not expressive or precise to describe all the details of my thoughts).
I appreciate any advice and comments, as it's difficult for me to even come out with a request of help.
P.S. Haven't proofread the post. May have grammar-farts here or there.

I like it when movies retell the same story
To be clear I do not mean remakes like Disney’s lion king or cash grabs sequels movie studios tend to do. I mean actually retelling a story.
Movies like Babylon, Rebel Moon, poor things. These movies are great because they retell told stories. Good stories should be retold and reimagined. It’s what we’ve been doing for ages. Ulysses one of the greatest works of literature in the English language, for example, in a way it is the Odyssey retold, a story whose story structure has become a trope onto itself. The lion king was a retelling of hamlet, 10 things I hate about you is taming of the shrew. It doesn’t have to be just literature 300 is a retelling of the legend of the 300 Spartans and despite the fact we know this battle happened as a historical fact, the story tells the legend, it’s the legendary actions of the great warriors of old.
Humans like retelling stories. How many King Arthur and Robin Hood movies and shows are there? How many King Arthur and Robin Hood books have been written since the year 900?
We like retelling, making stories suit our personalities, our era, our new generations. That’s why fanfics are a thing. Personally I’m not a fan of fanfic, but I understand and appreciate that it’s the love of a story that drives these creative minds to write terrible “romantic” fan fiction (fucking 50 shades of gray) and entire sub genres like steam punk are basically just jules vernes fanfiction. Lord of the rings being Norse mythology fan fiction and high fantasy being Lord of the rings “inspired”.
Star Wars was a retelling of westerns and samurai movies (also the fall of the roman republic). Rebel Moon and the Mandalorian are retellings of Star Wars. Metropolis is very much inspired by Frankenstein and Poor things is very much inspired by metropolis. Babylon retells the story of singing in the rain but retells it from behind the curtain of Hollywood and adapts it to our Modern sensibility.
Some stories are just so good they deserve a retelling. Some were good that one time in the 80s and 90s and shouldn’t be retold in the 2020s.
Star Wars needed to be retold by Lucas in the prequels and clone wars and then by the guys running the tv shows now. But most people don’t like how Disney is handling their IPs. That’s why I’m glad rebel moon exists, it’s telling the story of Star Wars from outside the clutches of Disney.
And I’m not saying this as an edge lord Snyder fan who considers the man as an absolute genius and libtards can shut the fuck up.
Zack Snyder is not one of the great directors. He’s a good one but not a master. He does not have the finesse of Kubric or Hitchcock, he doesn’t have the dynamic dialogue and art direction of early Tarantino or the self awareness of later Tarantino. Or any other director you personally consider to be a master of the craft.
But I respect the hell out of the guy to telling the stories he likes the way he understands them, his determination on having creative control on any project. His charisma when treating cast and crew. His intent on adapting works faithfully and the way he interprets them (with the exception of murder Batman).
His take on superman is an interesting one. A more apathetic superman. Compared to homelander and other evil supermans, it’s one that describes the time Cavil was Superman. An apathetic time, not as divided, but on the way to division through apathy.
His take on Watchmen. More grounded and realistic than Moor’s version, but is still faithful. He understood that watchmen as written by moor is unfilmable and needs to be properly adapted.
And 300s faithfulness speaks for itself.
But he’s no genius adapter. The superman he wanted to bring back was the one who died in the 80s. He tried to right the mistake of death of superman. He messed it up in the beginning. Corrected it in Batman v Superman and landed it in the Snyder Cut. But he had to course correct very hard.
Now. Rebel moon. The retelling of Star Wars.
Blending the tone of the prequels and the story of the original trilogy with that Snyder touch.
To that I say keep going Zack. The direction your movies have taken so far has certainly been rocky at times but you got a second chance in the Snyder cut and this new shift is doing well so far. Keep telling the stories that you like the way you see them.

Please help, I really need to find this song it’s bothering me so much. I cannot remember the title, but I’m like 70% sure the title is English/has English in the title with Japanese
I’m really positive that the voice was Miku.
The video was an MV, so it wasn’t just a still image for the whole vid, but I believe most of the animation consisted of still/slightly animated images and camera effects (I can’t recall exactly, it wasn’t, like, animated characters, tho—that’s what I remember. And it definitely was not MMD) and the imagery was kinda similar to PinocchioP (who is one of my top favorite vocaloid producers, so at first I thought it was from them, but I’m pretty sure it is not) but a little more edgy looking and less of a use of character animation. The content of the video was very consistent, it stayed the same style and setting and used a lot of the same bits several times. The music video jumped around a decent amount, it was one of the more chaotic (in a good way) MVs but not anywhere near as chaotic as, like, Kikuo. I feel like there was some flashy-ness and quick color changes/flashes but I’m not super positive on that.
I remember clearly that there was a strong motif of skeletons, including a Miku skeleton (or maybe just her skull, I just remember a skull with her hair or clothes lol) in the music video. There was also a motif of the earth. The art style was not really anime, it was a more realistic and edgy feeling style, at least I think so. I don’t remember it showing much of Miku, but she was herself in the vid, not an OC, at least that’s what I remember. The art style for some reason makes me think of newspapers? Like, it felt handmade or cut-out, if that makes sense. But it was not black in white, however. It had mostly dark colors. It might have been sort of a typography kind of thing ( animated lyric video ) but honestly I don’t remember at all if the words were on the screen or just in captions (I always use captions anyway so)
The lyrics I’m pretty positive were in Japanese, but it’s possible it was in English. Anyway, they had something to do with people being stuck on their traditional beliefs and being very stubborn and close minded (idk if that was the official meaning tho, I’m pretty sure that was just what I read a lot in the comments and understood from the lyrics). If it were in Japanese, it definitely had English subtitles. I think some people speculated it was in the perspective that Miku was an extraterrestrial being judging humans, tho that was just theory too I’m pretty sure.
I also remember the comments talking about how this kind of song/video was different compared to this creator’s previous work, but a lot of people liked it regardless. I think there were lots of comments comparing their new stuff to their old stuff. I have no idea what the creators name is tho. With that memory, I think that this song was probably newer rather than older (but not super new either I don’t think, like it wasn’t made this year or anything, I watched it a long while ago. Most likely mid-late 2010s). I thought that their name began with K or M but honestly I have no idea, it could be anything.
I know this feels like a lot of random info lol, but it’s bothering me so much and everytime I search up “Miku song with her skeleton in it” it shows me “skeleton orchestra” which is not it and “ miku” by anamanaguchi for some weird reason. It was also not bacterial contamination. I have watched a lot of top 100 vocaloid or guess the vocaloid song and have not seen it in any. So, it’s not super popular. But, it’s very likely that the artist is popular, and this was a less popular song. I am pretty positive that YouTube recommended it to me and that’s how I found it.
I can picture it really well (I’m a super visual person) but I can’t think of any words/titles/authors. If someone could help, or at least give me a better way to search for it myself, that would be much appreciated.
Here is a short version of my info lol i yap a lot:
-Miku was the singer
-Title very likely had English.
-Likely in Japanese, but could have been English
-Almost certainly not from the 2000s, I’d say most likely mid-late 2010s.
-Definitely had English subtitles, either YouTube CC or in-video OC, even if the video was in English.
-Not well known (but author is very possibly well known)
-Had MV (not a still image)
-MV was not complicated- lots of repeated bits with mostly camera effects and still/slightly animated images.
-Strong motif of Skeletons
-Motif of Earth
-Miku skeleton (had her hair or her clothes)
-Similarish MV imagery style to Pinocchio-P but more edgy looking and less character-based
-Somewhat chaotic MV (potential flashing colors/lights)
-MV stayed consistent in style and setting.
-Not MMD
-Not an animation centered on characters (barely showed Miku)
-Miku was Miku, not an OC
-Art style was more realistic and edgy rather than anime or chibi
-Mostly dark colors
-Art style reminded me of newspapers for some reason (maybe felt handmade/cut-out)
-Lyrics were thought to be about people being closed minded and rigid with their beliefs/judgement
-I feel like there were people speculating if miku was an extraterrestrial being in the vid
-Comments frequently discussed this creator’s new vs. old work.
-Comments claimed this song/ video was different than the creator’s previous work (but still liked it)
-Not skeleton orchestra
-Not bacterial contamination

I’ve never done anything like this ever. I’ve been in the internet for 10 years, but I’ve always been one of the quiet users, the ones that never comment on anything or participate in chats. But I need to talk somehow, and this is the way that I think I’m most comfortable with. I lost my mom one year and two months ago, she was my everything. I remember crying when I was younger about how my life would be a mess if she wasn’t in it, and nowadays, it is. I’m 21 years old, I don’t have a good relationship with my father or his family because they don’t treat me well, they don’t talk to me or ask how I’m doing and when they do, it’s to have arguments. I have a brother, but I can’t count on him, anytime I ask for anything, he always pulls up an excuse. My godmother (my mom’s sister) used to take care of me, but honestly, she never knew how, and I don’t blame her for that, I always tried to be comfortable in the way she treated me even though I wasn’t. The problem is that right now she is going to a tough moment, she’s divorcing her husband and, how is normal, she is sad all day and venting with me, and when I try to complain about my stuff or ask for help, she takes the issue back to her and it’s like she doesn’t listen to me. I’m not working atm. I worked last summer and everyday I woke up I had panic attacks about how I had to work, but it was because I was in a toxic environment. I did a flight attendant course and I wanted to work as it, but I have a tattoo in my arm and I was rejected in various interviews. I’m currently removing it, but it is a long process. It’s been a year now. Lately, some people that I used to call friends, have failed me, and luckily I have friends that I know I can trust, but they are too busy studying or working or in another country and I can’t help but feel alone. I’ve been going to a therapist since December and she is a true angel, she is like an older sister to me, she gives me the best advice, but lately, those advices aren’t just enough. I feel like I’m in an eternal void and I can’t get out, because the only one that could get me out, was my mom. I feel like there’s no reason for me to stay alive, I have no motivation to continue this path and I just want to end my suffering.
PS: sorry if something is not in good writing, English is not my first language, but I tried my best. PS2: if you read this, thank you for taking a moment of your life to read me.

I think I've been burned out for years. I made some major life changes that I thought would help with burnout, and it helped some, but I've fallen back into old patterns of trying to do too much and then feeling lots of shame and frustration when I can't do more. This week, my therapist shared that she thinks I have ADHD burnout. She thinks I need time to rest and heal before my brain and body will be able to function better like it used to. She also talked about how, for people with ADHD, "rest" might look different, like we still need some easy things to do that can keep us occupied, but without trying to do productive things on our to-do lists. This resonated, as I can't just sit and watch TV to relax, I've gotta be knitting or on my phone or writing cards to my family or paying bills etc while I'm watching TV. I like reading, but after a while, I start to get bored and skip ahead to future chapters to see what's going to happen. I've been enjoying more graphic novels lately, and maybe the visual component helps sustain my attention better than words on a page, but they're so short, and I get decision fatigue about what to read next.
I'm going to be thinking more about what rest and burnout recovery looks like for me and how to implement that practically. Taking 12 weeks off of work isn't practical, but maybe actually taking my weekends to rest and do fun things instead of work/chores? I'm self-employed, so there's literally always some work to do, and I'll often spend several hours on the weekend working, trying to catch up on things. But she thinks I need to rest and heal before trying to catch up vs. "I need to catch up, and then I'll relax" (which, as we know, never happens; we never actually get through that to-do list!)

I'm curious about others' experiences with ADHD burnout, and have any of you been able to recover from it? What did burnout recovery look like for you? What helped? 🤷‍♀️

Also, as a woman with ADHD, what kinds of activities feel restful to you? What do you do exactly when you're at home and want to do something that's fun and relaxing?

EP. 6 is OUT in Gagaoolala
OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: " Just as freshman Ryota Natsukawa moves out on his own for the first time, his childhood friend Kazuhito Tanaka ends up moving in with him. As they adjust to being roommates, Ryota asks why Kazuhito, a handsome and clean-cut guy, hasn't fo1und a girlfriend. How will their relationship develop as they start to care more about one another?"
☆ Someone as sweet as you shouldn't be single!!
☆ Ryuta Sato from " Kamen Rider Geats" falls for Sho Sakai from " Takara-kun to Amagi-kun"
☆ Featuring the talents of the director of "My Personal Weatherman" and the writer of "Perfect Propose" and " Old Fashion Cupcake"
The series is adapted from the manga "Living with Him" (彼のいる生活) by Miyata Toworu (宮田トヲル). The manga has both an official english translation by Animate International ( in physical form) and Mangaplaza and Renta ( for digital format) and it has been completely scanlated in english.
The trailer
The MDL page.
OST:
"Furete" by Urashimasakatasen Lyric MV up on YouTube Listen on Spotify

So, I'm not entirely sure what my goal is with this post. One thing I know for certain is that it will be very long, and probably sort of jumbled and frantic, more stream of consciousness than anything. I guess I just sort of wanted to share some of the important realizations I've had in recent months, and see if: 1. Other people think that they're fair or "correct" realizations, and I'm not becoming, like, delusional or something. 2. Maybe my sharing these perspectives will help or inspire someone else who has struggled in ways similar to me.
So, here's the basic background of things. I've always been a really reserved and quiet person, ever since I was a little kid. Add in being skinny and nerdy for most of my life, and maxing out at a height of 5'9", and I'm not exactly a hot product for the average girl my age (19, turning 20 in a few weeks). In fact, I'd never had a relationship until this past year in college, but I'll get more into that in a minute. Hell, I hadn't had so much as a first kiss until this past year, either.
And, at the beginning of this past school year, being my second year of college (as a commuter student, so socializing is pretty difficult), I began to really get down on myself for having never been in a relationship, never kissed a girl, being a virgin, etc. It started to really take a toll on my mental health, because I believed that there was something intrinsically wrong and unlovable about me. Whereas a lot of young men who struggle socially romantically seem to be directing their sadness, frustration, and anger outward toward the world, especially toward women, I instead found myself directing those feeling toward myself. I was convinced that, on a basic level, there was some vital component to who I am as a person that disqualifies me from being worthy of love or affection. After all, that's what 19 years of evidence suggest, right?
Looking back, I think a large component in this was how I had been struggling, and still struggle to a degree, with my identity as a young man. I'm naturally a pretty progressive person, and I make an effort to be open to the perspectives of other groups and listen to their stories. Unfortunately, as we all know, a lot of people have been harmed by the men in their lives. And I know, I know: if I'm not doing anything wrong myself, then I shouldn't take any of these stories personally.But I guess, given the poor mental state that I was already in, I took it as validation that there was in fact something intrinsically wrong about me, and that thing was being a man. I started to avoid people on the street, especially if they were a woman or presented as feminine. At work, I avoid going anywhere near female customers, out of fear of making them uncomfortable. I'd keep my head down walking from class to class on campus, worried that I might make someone uneasy with my gaze. It wasn't that I thought I was a threat; in fact, I knew that I was not. But I also knew that the people around me didn't know that. In their eyes, maybe they have to assume that I'm a creep or that I'm a dangerous type of man. And it hurt to realize that, and I realize now, like I said, that I took it as validation that there was something intrinsically wrong with me.
Due to that, as well as other factors, such as stress and exhaustion from overworking (I'm a full-time student and work about 30 hours a week, which is a lot for me, might not be for others, I admit), I experienced some of the worst periods of depression I've ever had, since being diagnosed with it and anxiety in 2021. I tried going to therapy. I went to a few sessions, then gradually started missing more and more due to a lack of time, until my therapist cancelled all of our scheduled future sessions. It was on me. I wasn't committed.
I lost my passion for my hobbies and interests, like creative writing, which had previously been an important emotional outlet for me. A lot of nights would be spent lying in bed, listening to a playlist filled with sad music and hugging a pillow, wishing it was someone who loved me in the way that I thought, or hoped, love would work.
At the behest of my friends, to whom I only presented my issues as being a little down about never having been in a relationship, I started messing around with dating apps. At first, I felt good about making some sort of effort to put myself out there. Like I said, I've always been insanely reserved, so doing something like making a dating profile felt like an accomplishment. Of course, nothing much came of it. Over the five or so months that I was on the app, I maxed out at about six likes on my profile, and only matched with two people.
But one of those two people was a girl who went to the same college as me, and we seemed to have a lot of interests in common. And I mean a lot. To the point that it was almost comical. Of course, I realize now that having some hobbies in common isn't enough to form a good relationship with someone, but I realize now that I was just desperate for someone who I could convince myself halfway-tolerated me. She and I started to go out, and after a while, we decided to make things "official." My first kiss. My first relationship. My first girlfriend.
It lasted for only a few months. After a while, something felt off. I wasn't as excited to see her as I had been before. It was hard for us to make time for each other, between my working and her being involved in extracurricular stuff around campus. Car rides and dates began to be filled with longer and more frequent stretches of awkward silence, as I tried to think of something to say or talk about, only to come up empty-handed. As we got to know each other better, I realized that we didn't have as much in common as I first thought. She was a little more conservative, not necessarily in a political sense, but more in terms of "status", if that makes sense. I learned that financial success was very important to her parents, and I could tell that it was important to her, too. She avoided telling her parents that I was an English major, instead opting to tell them that I was getting a degree in computer science, as that was my minor at the time. It seemed to me that the status of a relationship was more important to her than the quality of the relationship (pot calling the kettle black, yes, I realize). For example, there was a dance on campus that she wanted to go to, pretty much just to take pictures of the two of us together so she could show them to friends and family. But as for the dance itself, it was more of the same that had been happening before: awkward silence, short conversations, lots of looking around at anything other than each other.
After a while, I decided that, for both of our sakes, I needed to break things off. I didn't want to waste her time when I knew that my heart wasn't in it anymore. So, at the beginning of April, I drove over to her dorm, and we talked it over in my car for a while. At the end, we hugged one last time, and I haven't seen her since.
I think a key component in the decision I made is the fact that I reconnected with some old friends from high school, who are still local, even though they are going to another university. Over Christmas break, I hung out with them for the first time since the pandemic as, during that time, I ended up having a falling out with them over some dumb high school drama and political differences. To my surprise, they had changed a lot, and had managed to pull themselves out of the incel trajectory that I had seen them beginning to fall down during high school. They were kinder, more accepting people. My surprise was matched only by my pride in them. I had feared and assumed the worst of them, and I couldn't have been happier to be proven wrong. Since then, I've been invited back into their group chats, and I see them in-person with some regularity, when our schedules allow it.
I think having that connection made me feel more comfortable with the idea of being single again, and since the break up, I've been able to rely on them for support, laughs, and just feeling like I have somewhere I belong. Before, I found myself desperate for any kind of connection and fell into a cycle of denying myself that connection because I was convinced that, since it didn't just present itself, I wasn't worthy of it.
And maybe it has something to do with that, but on the drive home from my now-ex's dorm (though I still wonder if I should/could really call her an ex. Sure, we agreed to make things "official", but we still only dated for a few months), I felt my perspective on, well, at the risk of sounding over-dramatic or overly romantic, everything, being to change.
And I guess that's what the title of this post is about. The things I've begun to realize in the time leading up to and following that break-up.
Above all else, I've realized the importance of connection. If I didn't have a stable friend group again, I don't know where I'd be. Probably still in a stale relationship, clinging on and trying to convince myself that I'm not feeling the way that I'm feeling. I have people to talk with again, to confide in when I feel stressed or depressed. I go out and do things again, which I didn't realize I hadn't really done very much since the pandemic.
But I know that for a lot of people who are/were in the position I had been in, finding friends is difficult. If it weren't for my unique circumstances of being reunited with an old, estranged group of friends, I would absolutely be in the same position. I still really struggle with social anxiety, and talking to new people is a huge struggle for me. So, I've also had some realizations that don't have as much to do with the friendship side of things, and I hope that these can be of some use to people who also struggle with social anxiety.
I know that the idea of "working on yourself" is cliche and overused, so I won't frame it exactly like that. In my opinion, saying it like that makes it sound too daunting and tedious, and having been in those dark, dark places myself, I know that it was the last thing I wanted to hear. So, instead, I like to think of it this way. It's more like living in spite of your circumstances. Over the course of this past year, I essentially shut my life down, because I was so convinced that there was no point, because I felt that I knew that I would never be loved or accepted. Now, I feel an urge to go on living for myself, almost in direct spite of the fear that I may be forever alone. It's a fear that I still deal with, and who knows, maybe things will end up that way.
And, I suppose, that leads into my main realization, which is sort of an extension/restatement of the last one, now that I think about it. I now feel the desire to accumulate enough in my life, to reach a point where I am satisfied enough, that I can rest knowing that I will be okay, with or without a relationship. Before, my self-worth was almost entirely attached to my relationship status, and my lack of romantic experience. Now, I realize that a relationship can only come when I don't need it, or at least don't feel that I need it. Being a huge nerd and a writer, I think a lot about quotes from books, shows, movies, and games that have stuck with and there's one from God of War: Ragnarok that comes to mind here (by the way, I actually highly recommend playing or watching a playthrough of God of War 2018 and Ragnarok if you've struggled with masculinity in the same way I have, the music and cutscenes from those games have actually helped to pull me out of some mental spirals about my self-worth and identity as a man). It comes from a scene in which Kratos confronts his younger self, and is trying to decide if he is willing/ready to be a god again:
"Should I lose everything and everyone, will there still be enough left inside so that I do not become you? I do not know. But I have hope."
It's a quote that resonates with me now more than ever (even though it's from a DLC that just came out around Christmas, lol). I know now that I want to get to a place where there is enough left inside me that I know I'll never fall into that dark mental state again.
Something else that I've noticed has happened is the return of my passions for my hobbies and interests, especially for writing. I don't want to sound too arrogant, but I think I've begun to realize an important goal for my writing. If I'm lucky enough, I want to be able to write and release stories that explore masculinity and isolation, and, if I can, I want to create stories that can help guide other young men and boys who have struggled in the way I have and continue to do. I want to create characters who serve as positive male role models, who are emotionally strong, intelligent, and kind. I want to write stories of personal redemption, and show that no one is truly ever too far gone to be able to recover. If my writing could help even just one person who is struggling, then I would consider my career to be a success.
At the risk of being too cheesy, I'd like to end this very long-winded post with another quote, this one from a YouTube channel I recently discovered, and one I would highly recommend to just about anyone: Cinema Therapy. It's from their video about "A Silent Voice", which also happens to be one of my favorite movies, and one of my main inspirations when it comes to the kinds of stories I want to tell.
"Depression doesn't go away, doesn't lift for most people. But there's a capacity to feel again. There's a capacity to feel joy. The cure for so many things is connection. And we may think 'no one want to connect with me.' But we just need to find the right people."
I think the only thing I would add to that is that, in my opinion, the connection can also be with yourself.

This is the first time I have written some chapters. I'm not a native English speaker but I did my best. If someone can give me some pointers or help I would immensely appreciate it! It's a bit of sci-fi, if you are into it let me know. If not, that's cool too.
Thx in advance!
Chapter 1: The farm
Hagr stood at the edge of the farm, his gaze fixed on the vast expanse of Zandarius stretching out before him. The sky above was a canvas of swirling purples and blues, streaked with the faint glow of distant stars. A cool breeze whispered through the air, carrying with it the enticing scent of Heyla flowers.
With a sigh, Hagr set down his mechanic wheelbarrow, the last of his chores for the day completed. He began to make his way back towards the farm, his footsteps crunching softly against the rocky terrain. As he passed through the pink and green garden, the aroma of his mother's porridge drifted towards him, tempting his hunger.
Despite eating the same meal every day, Hagr's stomach grumbled with anticipation. The suuka porridge was all he needed right now, its warm, comforting embrace promising to chase away the chill of the evening.
Arriving at the farm, Hagr took in the familiar sight of their plascrete igloo. Half of the structure was comprised of little octagon windows, through which the warm glow of a fire emanated from the chimney. It was home, humble yet comforting in its simplicity.
Entering the igloo, Hagr found his mother, Altha, bustling about the kitchen, preparing dinner. "Hagr, dear, could you set the table?" she called out, her voice gentle yet firm. Hagr nodded, a small smile playing at his lips as he arranged the mismatched dishes in their usual places. Each plate was different, yet they always ended up in the same spot, a testament to the routines of their daily life.
Once the table was set, Hagr ignited the moonlamp, casting a soft yellow glow across the igloo walls. Altha emerged from the kitchen, carrying a steaming pot of suuka porridge. "Careful, Hagr," she warned, as she placed the pot on the table. "It's hot." Hagr nodded as he heard this many times before, his mouth watering at the sight and smell of the hearty meal before him. They ate in silence, the only sound the clinking of spoons against bowls as they savored each mouthful.
After a moment, Hagr broke the silence, his voice tinged with curiosity. "Do you ever wonder what's beyond Zandarius, Mumu?" he asked. Altha hesitated, her expression guarded. "I don't know, Hagr," she replied softly. "But we have everything we need right here on the farm." Though disappointed by her response, Hagr nodded in understanding. Perhaps someday they would have the chance to explore together. Altha caught his eye and winked, a small glimmer of hope in her gaze.
As they finished their meal, Hagr and Altha moved to the small kitchen area to wash the dishes. The kitchen was cluttered yet cozy, with shelves overflowing with pots, pans, and utensils. Beyond the kitchen, the interior of the igloo was a snug retreat from the harshness of the outside world. A small cupboard, crafted from Zandarius rare Bennam wood, stood in one corner, its doors closed tight to conceal its overflowing contents. Nearby, a plush couch with pillows offered a comfortable spot to relax after a long day's work. Opposite the couch, a large hammock hung from the ceiling. Above it, a smaller hammock swayed gently in the breeze, providing a cozy nest for Hagr during the night. Every inch of space was utilized to its fullest, creating a sense of warmth and intimacy within the cramped confines of the igloo.
As the hour grew late, Altha reminded Hagr of their upcoming journey to Kihar. With a yawn, Hagr climbed into his hammock, gazing up at the stars through the little octagon windows above. "Goodnight, Hagr," Altha whispered, her voice soft in the quiet of the night. "Goodnight, Mumu," Hagr replied, his eyes closing as sleep overtook him. And with that, he drifted off, thoughts of tomorrow's journey fading into the comforting embrace of dreams.
Chapter 2: The trip
Hagr awoke to the gentle light filtering through the little octagon windows of their igloo. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he glanced around and noticed that his mother's hammock was empty. Mu-mu?" he called out, but there was no response.
Curiosity piqued, Hagr peered outside and spotted his mother tending to the kikkamoos, their pig-like creatures with reptilian legs and Fluffy tails. With a swift motion, he leaped out of bed, his movements practiced from years of experience. After quickly dressing himself, he hurried outside, calling out to his mother. "Altha!" he yelled, using her full name in his urgency. His mother turned towards him with a warm smile. "Haggie!" she called back, using his pet name.
Hagr wasted no time and dashed off to fetch Tsjoopa, their trusty mechanical unicycle cart already loaded with goods for trade. As he returned with the cart, he found his mother waiting back at the farm. "Ready to go, Hagr?" she asked, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. "Absolutely!" Hagr exclaimed, brimming with energy. And so, they set off on their journey to Kihar, the nearest town for trading.
The road ahead seemed endless, traversing through vast and barren plains broken only by occasional patches of vegetation. Sparse woods flanked the roadside, offering concealment but little wildlife, a testament to Zandarius' unforgiving environment.
After a few hours of travel, they finally reached a landmark known as the Sharp Knives, a crossroad marked by sharp rocks jutting out of the ground. "We’re here, the Sharp Knives," Altha remarked, her gaze sweeping over the rugged terrain. "We're halfway there, Hagr." Hagr nodded, his eyes scanning the horizon. "Already? Time flies when you're in good company." A mischievous glint sparkled in Altha's eyes as she reached into the cart. "Speaking of good company, I brought something special for our halfway mark." Hagr's interest was piqued. "What is it?" With a dramatic flourish, Altha revealed a small container of sosuuka, a sweeter version of yesterday's porridge. "Sosuuka!" Hagr exclaimed, trying to sound enthusiastic despite his familiarity with the dish. Altha chuckled at his feigned excitement. "I thought it might be a nice treat for our journey." Hagr grinned, playing along. "Absolutely! Thanks, best mumu on Zandarius." Lost in thought, Altha gazed into the distance, her attention drawn to the gathering ominous clouds on the horizon, a harbinger of stormy weather to come. "We might have some rough weather ahead," Altha remarked, her voice tinged with concern. Hagr glanced up at the darkening sky. "Should we stop and wait it out?" Altha shook her head. "We need to keep moving. We can't afford to delay our journey." Guess we'll have to save the view for another time," Hagr sighed, reluctantly agreeing with Altha's decision, while she nodded in understanding. "But, after all," Hagr declared, puffing out his chest with a hint of pride, "at ten years old, I'm practically a grown man! I can handle anything, even eating sosuuka on the way without spilling a drop." Altha burst into laughter at his boast. "Sosuuka without spilling? I'd sooner believe kikkamoos could fly!" Hagr joined in her laughter, the sound echoing across the desolate landscape as they continued on their journey to Kihar.
Chapter 3: Arrival in Kihar
As Hagr and Altha approached Kihar, the plascrete town sprawled out before them, its streets winding like intricate mazes through the heart of the city. In stark contrast to the barren landscape of Zandarius, Kihar was a vibrant tapestry of life, with lush vegetation adorning every corner. Hagr’s eyes roamed over the cityscape, taking in the sight of the bustling alleys and the constant mist of smoke that hung in the air. Despite having visited many times before, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of awe at the bustling energy of the tradetown.
As they ventured deeper into the heart of the city, the tantalizing aroma of food mingled with the sounds of chatter and laughter, tempting Hagr's senses and reminding him of the porridge-filled days back on their farm. Finally, they reached the local market, a bustling hub of activity where traders hawked their wares amidst the thick scent of spices and exotic foods. "First stop, Old Taramor's," Altha announced, her voice carrying above the din of the market. Hagr's thoughts drifted to Taramor, the old, grumpy trader who had been a fixture in Kihar for as long as he could remember. Despite his rough exterior, Taramor was one of the few honest traders left in the city, and Hagr had always respected him for it. "Sounds good to me," Hagr replied, his tone positive.
As they approached Old Taramor’s, Altha hopped off the Tsjoopa and turned to Hagr. "Hagr, could you fetch a crate of Heyla bottles from the back of the cart?" she asked. Hagr nodded silently, already moving to comply.
Entering the shop, they found Taramor snoozing behind his counter, the cluttered shelves and dusty displays a testament to his lack of care for his surroundings. Altha hesitated, reluctant to disturb the old trader, but time was of the essence. "Taramor," she whispered, her voice barely audible. No response. Again a bit louder this time “Taramor”. Still no response. Growing impatient, Hagr couldn't help but raise his voice. "Taramor!" Startled awake, Taramor shot upright, his eyes wide with surprise. "What the hell's going on?" he grumbled, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Oh, it's just you two," he muttered, recognizing Altha and Hagr. Altha gestured to Hagr to take a look around while she spoke with Taramor. Hagr nodded and wandered through the cluttered shelves, his curiosity piqued by the assortment of strange and exotic items on display. In the background, a television played the news, the volume turned low but still audible. A news reporter's voice cut through the air, reporting on the recent assassination of a high-ranking official. The military had already neutralized one suspect, but two others were still at large. The camera footage showed two figures cloaked in dark red and black, their faces obscured. Zooming in on one of the suspects, the reporter noted a tattoo of a three-headed monster on their neck, linking them to the notorious syndicate known as the Three-Headed Beast. "People are urged to remain vigilant," the reporter concluded, "and to report any sightings of the suspects to the authorities." "Hagr," Altha called out, pulling him from his thoughts. Quickly, he set down a strange-looking coffee maker he had been inspecting and hurried over to join them.
Outside, Hagr turned to his mother, concern etched on his face. "How did the trade go?" Altha hesitated before answering, her tone guarded. "It wasn't as successful as we had hoped, but we'll manage." Trying to sound confident, Hagr responded, "No need to worry, Mumu. We'll make it work."
As they made their way back through the bustling market, Hagr glanced at his mother. " Can we get some Uja skewers now?" Altha smiled warmly. "Absolutely, Hagr. Let’s grab some delicious Uja," she said, turning on their trusty, albeit rusty, Tsjoopa.
Chapter 4: Best place is home
As Altha and Hagr made their way home in the fading light, a bird soared above them, its silhouette dark against the dusky sky. They were nearing their farmstead, the exhausting trip almost at an end. Hagr turned to Altha, his curiosity piqued. “What is coffee?” he asked, stumbling over the unfamiliar word. Altha pondered for a moment before responding, “I’ve heard of it. It’s some sort of black drink. Similar to Puggatree juice, they say, it gives you energy.” Hagr wrinkled his nose in distaste. He had never been fond of Puggatree juice, finding its thick texture and slimy consistency unappealing. With a shake of his head, he decided he didn’t want to try coffee after all.
As they chatted, unaware of the figure watching them from afar, the landscape growing darker with each passing moment, they finally arrived at the farm.
Altha unloaded the traded goods from the Tsjoopa, and with a nod to Hagr, she motioned for him to stow it away in the barn. Hagr complied, placing the Tsjoopa in the barn, where sturdy plascrete walls and reinforced wooden beams protected it from the harsh winds. With the task done, he made his way back to the igloo. As he approached, he noticed that the interior was unusually dark, the comforting glow of the moonlamp absent. With a sense of unease gnawing at him, he entered cautiously.
To his horror, he found himself face to face with a cloaked figure in dark black and red, his alien eyes glowing with an otherworldly light. Before he could react, he spotted his mother on the floor, tears streaming down her face, with another figure standing over her, a scarred human face, and a sinister three-headed beast tattoo on his neck. “Mumu!” Hagr screamed in terror. The figure with glowing eyes uttered incomprehensible words, while the scarred man cursed, "We can't leave any witnesses, Deskva.” Altha whispered urgently, "Hagr, stay calm. Everything will be fine." Hagr looked at his mother in disbelief, his heart pounding in his chest. "What's going to happen?" his voice trembled with fear. The scarred human scoffed, "We can sell the boy on the black market, but the woman? She's too old to bother selling. Not worth the hassle, Des." With brute force, Deskva grabbed Hagr, who fought against his captor with all his might. "Please, let me go!" Hagr pleaded, his voice desperate as he struggled against Deskva's grip. As Hagr cast a desperate glance at his mother, tears welling in his eyes, the scarred man turned his attention to Altha, deeming her of no value. Without hesitation, he drew his pistol, aimed, and fired, the shot piercing through Altha’s skull with a sickening thud echoing through the silent igloo. Hagr’s world shattered as he watched his mother fall, tears blurring his vision, bile rising in his throat. Before he could comprehend what was happening, a brutal blow to his head sent him spiraling into darkness.

We are Legion Ascending, a corp looking to create a fun and laid back environment for friends to play EVE with a severe enjoyment for blowing stuff up. We have interests in all paths of EVE including all security levels, PVE, PVP, and industry. we are industry and PVP focused.
We are also very happy about becoming a part of the Gentlemen’s.Club Alliance! This gives us access to both large and small PVP engagements.
We provide access to:

• Lowsec, nullsec and wormhole PVP small gang and large alliance fleets.
• Wormhole day-tripping for gas and PVE cash
• Corp Ice and Moon Mining fleets with boosts
• Frequent PVP roams
• FC opportunities
• Industry
• Nullsec Ratting
• Current corp tax: 5%

While we encourage all our members to be self-sufficient we are very community oriented. We will either succeed or fail as a group. We encourage everyone to hop in comms when they play not only for their EVE safety but also to grow friendships with others. Our corp is meant to be a close-knit group of friends who spend their time together accomplishing any goals the members or leaders set. You want a dread? Let’s go grind it out. Corp needs fuel? Let’s go mine some ice. A corp should value the member’s goals as well as corp goals.
We are also developing our buy-back program that will be more successful as we grow.
We started out in highsec and have now made the move to nullsec. We intend to keep a location in highsec for newbros who may need to learn before coming to null. We are building this corp from the ground up, moving one step at a time and enjoying the process.
We are looking for like-minded members who want to be a part of something and help build something to call our own. The corp doesn’t belong to the leaders, it belongs to all members and will only succeed if all come together. We pride ourselves on including our members in all major decisions regarding the corp and it’s future. In our corp no one is just a number.
Message us and see if you are interested in being a part of something bigger than any one person. Let’s succeed together.
We are Legion. We will Ascend.
Requirements: Newbros welcome 21+ English Speaking Working Microphone
As with any corp we do not put up with harassment of any kind. We expect adults to act like adults. Be respectful and kind to others or receive the boot on your way out the door.
Contacts: In game: Octane Charante, Fauyeti Altol, ToxicJacket Discord: [A5CND] Legion Ascending 11 In-game recruitment channel: A5CND

I'm currently doing a master's degree in developmental psychology and I chose to study the potential links between ASMR and attachment styles for my master's thesis. I've now translated the questionnaire so it could also be accessible for english speaking people, here is the link to the ENGLISH VERSION if you'd like to participate : https://framaforms.org/asmr-and-adult-attachment-styles-1715859920
You need to be 18 to 60 years old. It takes approximately 10-15 mins and will be open until early June. Thank you and have a nice day !

(sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes english isn't really my first language) i will not say anything about my location but trust me I MET A VAMPIRE. a few weeks ago i was talking to a girl on instagram and i said "vampires are so cool i wanna be one of them" and she replied "i don't think so." and i got suspicious about it. i said "why? i always wanted to be one" and she said "trust me you wouldnt if you knew how it is" and i got even more suspicious and said "how tf do you know being vampire sucks,are they real" and she said "if you have heard of something, it already exists or used to exist." and then i was like mega flabbergasted but i didn't wanted to believe yet because i thought they were just urban legends or smth.after a really long conversation she said "no i don't have any superpowers only eternals and their descendants has the things" because i asked "so you have those i mean you know the powers you really have them?" now i don't want to continue this by using she said and i said and only tell what i learned.first of all she is my girlfriend now and she's like MEGA CLINGY AND ATTACHED(i like this tbh) and she said don't tell anything but i really wanna tell! so let me just tell. there are eternals that has the most authority and power.they are the children of lilith.and only those became vampires with a blood of an eternal counts as an eternal.there are 111 eternals.222.clans.333.families.444.sub families(idk what it is but the thing they call "family" is not like the ones that we have.something like sharing the same blood.) anyway.they need blood once a week.eternals doesn't need blood to survive.they get the blood they needed at nighttime by seducing.because lilith's(their ancestor not god) favorite sin is "lust" so they seduce their victim at night.follow them.and drink their bloods without killing.killing isnt bad but the things is they can lick the sharp teeth's wound and heal the victim.and this healing makes victim forget everyting about it.they have a library that has the information us humans never has. like the ancient books,books about other real races(every one of them) or the cult books idk whatever you can imagine is in that library.weirdly enough the library is combined with the church(they have a different one) and they sometimes use special rooms in library to breed. yes i'm serious. and when the child is born. the eternals gather.take the child if the child has a potential to become a strong eternal.and if child is normal.they wash the child with blood.and give the child a name. like christening.the child doesn't use christening name in public life.the id card name and christening name is different.they are like have better perception than us like idk she said she can see things on other objects.seeing the spells eternals use.i said how does the magic look like and she said you can't imagine even if i told you how it is. you have to witness it but it'll probably be your last because eternals hate humans.they have a MASSİVE hierarchy.the weak always obeys. my gf is both a vampire and a elf so she doesn't have all vampire stuff. like she has strong and sharp teeths.a very pale skin.a lust for blood.and when i asked about it she said "we watch those vampire movies as a comedy show,nothing is real about them" other than that they all like us.working earning money socializing hitting your pinky toe to table leg etc etc.and if someone is exposed as a vampire.they brainwash the exposed one and somehow deleting every proof about it. like idk how but she said if the exposed vampire gets brainwashed. every proof,text,pic,any information about it in everyones mind gets deleted.i didnt believe this one but she said the eternals really has unique powers.and one thing i forgot to tell they experience the flames of hell every few years to get used to it.everyone.from child to old experiences the hell flames only as a pain.not any damage just pain.and she said it was HORRIBLE like very very very very painful. the reason behind that is the eternals tell that they will go to hell no mather what or who they are.every vampire goes straigt to hell because they are lilith's children. so they make themselves experience the hell's fire every few years to remind how it feels.and if i'll wont be online anymore then i'll get executed :3

I live in a major city and have a 10 month old. We had a nanny for 3 months who was fabulous, but she had a baby and is no longer working. Since then, we have interviewed many nannies and I haven’t like any of them. Sure, they’re fine, but I haven’t found someone who is very loving, does fun things to engage with our baby, and that I can communicate with (speaks any English). I’ve seen excellent nannies but they are all employed.
I work for myself so I can be with our daughter and work at night until we find someone, but doing this is becoming too much to handle.
Nobody else seems to have an issue finding someone, and I really don’t think my standards are absurd. We’re offering $33/hour on the books (would do more if someone great negotiated).
I’m starting to feel really down on myself about my inability to find childcare that I feel good about, and my business is suffering.
Would love any perspectives and anyone to tell me if I’m crazy or what’s going on! Thanks in advance 🙂

1. who is the winner of produce 48
   
2. what is the age of wonyoung when she debuted
   
3. what is wonyoung nationality
   
4. who is the center of izone
   
5. can wonyoung speak english
   

6.did she come from rich family

1. has wonyoung undergone plastic surgery
   
2. how many plastic surgeries did wonyoung take
   
3. who is the new mc of music bank
   
4. who is the center of ive
   
5. is wonyoung most favored by starship entertainment
   
6. why do wonyoung always overdo her expressions
   
7. does wonyoung have attitude problems
   
8. why wonyoung is named as pick me girl
   
9. why wonyoung always act cute and over do aegyo
   
10. is wonyoung obssesed with center position and her looks
    
11. does wonyoung have celebrity disease
    
12. why wonyoung tries hard to be pretty
    
13. is wonyoung is the lazy dancer in ive
    
14. why wonyoung is called 4th generation It girl
    
15. how many brands did wonyoung endorse
    
16. who is the sister of jang wonyoung
    
17. is wonyoung most beautiful girl of 4th generation
    
18. networth of wonyoung
    

25 .why people hate wonyoung even though there are many idols
TO ALL THE QUESTIONS WONYOUNG ANSWER BE LIKE - NO PROBLEM YOUR YOU AND I AM ME , I DON' T CARE
speaking the truth many people wanted to ruin her but, as you all know no one can reach the queen
wonyoung is always slay ,no matter what other people say she worked so hard to reach this level of success , and people are so jealous of the fact that a 19 years old girl achieved so much when compared to so many idols in the industry
DIVE always there for wonyoung ,and keep loving her

I'm posting some old stories that I wrote maybe 6 or 7 years ago before I knew HFY existed so you may have read them before on WP or some other sub but they are mine. Also, obligatory "english is not my first language"
Calvin sat in silence, his gaze focused on the green dot flashing slowly on his console. The Council had kept their word. His comm interface had connected to a temporary relay satellite near Saturn. A special request that was granted to lift Earth's isolation sentence for a brief moment to relay a final message to the cosmos. Everything was ready, the message prerecorded the day before and final adjustements to the gift had been made a few weeks ago. Calvin pondered everything that had happened, every events leading to this moment, to humanity's last chance to stand on the centerstage.
It didn't start this way. When humanity first made contact with an extraterrestrial race, we were welcomed with opened arms. Our very first message was "we come in a spirit of friendship" Humanity's quick evolution and technological progress had already caught the attention of the Galactic System Alliance. Some of its members were concerned over the general violent tendencies demonstrated throughout human history but true to its benevolent mission, the Alliance had given humanity the benefit of the doubt. We were allowed outposts, territories, trading routes and even the newly created 328th seat on the Galactic Council of Representatives. Humanity was given a real fair chance to shine. And boy did we waste it.
The Galactic Alliance was over 5 million years old, some of its members could be traced back all the way to the founding days of the Alliance. It had brought about a previously unheard of, almost uninterrupted era of peace throughout the galaxy. Its rulings were generally both fair and just. A beacon of hope and justice into the dark cosmos. Humanity gave it its first civil war, less than 50 years after joining. 5 million years of peace, ripped apart in the space of a moment.
Humanity started off well enough. Outposts and trading were profitable and while human vessels were not as technologically advanced as other races, our ability to anticipate enemy movements and quickly adapt to volatile situations made us a prime candidate for galactic peacekeeping missions. Humans rapidly made a name for themselves as a deterrent to pirates and smugglers. The Galactic Council did not hesitate to authorize human settlements in sectors prone to hostile actions, knowing that humanity's presence would pacify a sector quickly. Humanity's image rose to a more favorable one and initial concerns and hesitations towards us slowly crumbled away. Unfortunately with the rise of humanity's standing, came a rise of its hubris. After all, humans will always remain humans; fickle, volatile, greedy.
Humanity became more and more demanding in its dealings with the Alliance. We constantly wanted more, became arrogant, took what we felt we deserved. The Council turned a blind eye when humanity moved in on turbulent territories and claim them for itself but before long, we had our eyes set on more prominent systems. With every outburst and hostile action, we only isolated ourselves further. Humanity's positive image quickly turned negative, and when backed into a corner, humanity turned vengeful. We convinced ourselves we were the victims and that in the end, it was us or them. Some members of the Alliance came to view our side of things, others were forced into servitude. A simple spark was all it took for a full fledge civil war to break out.
Within the span of only 3 years, the Alliance was on fire, divided, broken. Humanity's unmatched potential for warfare made it a formidable enemy but in the end our arrogance got the better of us and we lost. The consequences for our actions were harsh but justified. Given humanity's irrecoverable nature, we had been sentenced to erasing. All humans would be relocated to Earth, sterilized and left to die alone, the Sol system kept under a permanent military blockade. All mentions of humanity were to be removed from Galactic history and we would be forgotten, erased from existence. It was the second time only, in the entire Alliance's history that this punishment was handed out.
As a final gesture of good will, the Council had authorized a final message from humanity's last living representative to the members of the Alliance, to be distributed, but then erased. Looking up from his console, Calvin toggled the small switch that would send out the transmission to the satellite's internal memory, then end his life. He permitted himself a final smile, the Council would be seriously pissed... at first.
In the dark emptiness of space, the small satellite's memory indicator turned red, signaling reception of a message but unfortunately it was too far away to witness the small light flash from the thermo nuclear explosion that officially ended humanity's presence in the galaxy.
Captain Xandar was pacing back and forth across the small bridge of his scout vessel. While he was honored to be part of an official Council mission, he couldn't help but feel that he was potentially being sacrificed as cannon fodder. The Council may have granted the human's wish of a last message but it still feared a trap. Human's deceptive and violent nature would leave a dark shadow on the galaxy, slow to vanish. Humanity's first word to the Alliance, "Friend" had become a synonym of "deceit, treachery and naivety". The 20 large warships hiding just outside the limit of the Sol system did nothing to calm Xandar's nerves. While they were there to offer protection in case of a human trap, should things go south they would probably not hesitate to destroy Xandar's vessel if needed.
Captain, we are in range of the relay satellite. Systems confirm there is indeed a message on the internal memory. Initial scans show the data file is rather large but still looks clean.
Xandar sighed, the poor human schmuck probably went on a long tirade against the Alliance. A fitting end for such a violent race.
Very well lieutenant, download and scan the message. If everything looks good we'll transmit it to the Council and they can decide if it's worth sharing to the rest of the Alliance or not.
As soon as the young lieutenant opened the message file, all lights on the bridge went out, the quiet hum of the engines vanished and artificial gravity disengaged. Xandar was doing his best to maintain his composure while slowly drifting 2 feet in the air but as suddenly as it had vanished, artificial gravity came back and the emergency lighting activated, bathing the bridge in a reddish hue. On the main screen was a sole human, weak and frail in appearance.
Apologies to the commander of the Alliance vessel, I assure you that I meant no disrespect and no harm to your vessel and your crew. As authorized by the Galactic Council of Representatives, I hereby bring you a final farewell from humanity, as well as a final gift to remember us by.
Xandar was panicking, all restraint and stoic facade usually associated with his rank had vanished from his face, his eyes were white with fear.
Shit! The damn human played us like fool! Lieutenant, I want an immediate status report on the ship's systems. First officer, contact the fleet, there is no telling what we just exposed ourselves to.
Comms are down sir, unable to raise the fleet. We have limited access to the main computer and all blast doors have been sealed shut throughout the ship. She’s dead in the waters Sir.
Damn it! I want every exabyte of that datafile analyzed for any trace of a virus or even biological agents. We should have known better than to trust the humans to honor their word.
Xandar looked back to the monitor, the human had remained silent, probably anticipating the commotion that his message would cause. Xandar waited for the recording to resume.
Now, I assume the initial moment of shock is behind us so let’s continue. As I said, I bring you a final gift from humanity to all races and citizens of the Alliance. Fear not, though this final deception on our part may appear as vengeful, I assure you it is not the case. I knew the Council would never allow for this message to be shared throughout the Alliance, let alone our gift so I had to take some creative measures. Your analysis team is probably telling you about now that the 2 data files enclosed with this message are organic and they are correct though fear not, it is not a biological agent or a viral threat. Both files contain the DNA blueprints of Dogs. While we initially had dozen of sub-species, the complexity of this entire action limited me to only upload one specific breed. More precisely I give you the Retriever Labrador. I have enclosed blueprints for a brown-coated male and a golden-coated female. Though they are called man's best friend, I assure you they are nothing like us, to the contrary they are loyal, playful and innocent. They represent everything humanity has failed to be. They are our gift to you in the hope that you will one day forgive us for everything we have done. May they be a protector when evil threatens you. May they be love when hate isolates you. May they be a beacon of hope when darkness surrounds you. Treat them well. We did not deserve them, but hopefully you will prove yourself worthy of them.
The ship's systems came back online the very moment the recording ended. Lights rekindled across the bridge and the engines sprung back to life, filling the vessel with their low humming. Xandar looked over to the bridge crew, most of them still in shock and unsure of what exactly had happened. It was the young comms lieutenant that broke the silence first.
Sir, all systems are back online. Comms are back up and the fleet is hailing us, they want to know what the hell is going on. They are asking if we have been compromised.
Tell the fleet to remain on stand-by, we will need to assess the situation. First officer, give me a full systems check.
Sir, I'm detecting a massive power fluctuation from levels 3 through 7. Powers appears to have been rerouted to the auxiliary deck.
Tell engineering to stabilize the power levels and seal off the auxiliary deck
Controls are unresponsive Sir, power is being channeled to the backup biological replicators
What? Kill all power to the auxiliary deck, NOW!
We can't, the auxiliary deck is hooked up directly within the main generator and has its own dedicated safety bypass. It's meant to work even in the events of a catastrophic engine failure to insure the survival of the crew.
Shit! The human didn't do this by accident. He purposely automated his virus through the backup replicators knowing full well we wouldn't be able to turn them off. First officer, I need you to vent the atmosphere from the auxiliary deck's replicator room.
Controls are unresponsive Sir
Then blow the damn room out to space, do whatever is needed to stop this!
There is nothing we can do sir, we're completely locked out of the auxiliary deck. Security teams are waiting outside the replicator room but the system won't allow me to open the door.
Xandar was unsure how to proceed at this point. They had been compromised but calling in the fleet would mean immediate destruction. He pondered for a while but then made the decision to contact the fleet regardless of the consequences. He had a duty to insure the safety of the Alliance. He turned to the young lieutenant and gave the order to raise the fleet. His gaze was however quickly met with the panicked expression of the young comm's lieutenant.
Sir! The recording! It's transmitting itself to the fleet via our open commlink!
WHAT?
The fleet is no longer responding. I think... I think they're going through what we went through when we first opened the recording.
Xandar was in shock. The realisation of what was about to happen was slowly setting in.
If you're right son, that means the recording will activate their organic replicators as well and then transmit itself to the rest of the Alliance fleet. We've doomed the Alliance.
Sir! Replicators report completion of their programmed tasks.
Auxiliary deck controls are back online! Scanners indicate 2 life forms. Replicator room doors just opened on their own!
Xandar turned slowly towards his first officer.
Sir, there is a final message on the replicator console's screen.
---Protocol Goodboy1 successful
---Protocol Goodgirl2 successful
---May they show you the true meaning of the word "Friendship"
Bonus
It only seemed fitting that humanity's last action would be to blow trough bureaucratic redtapes and regulations to impose dogs on the galaxy (with the best of intentions of course). Calvin did promise no harm would come the vessel and its crew and that's been true... for the most part. There is definitly no physical harm and while psychological and/or traumatic consequences are a possibility (albeith a rather small one), you know... dogs will take care of that. It all works out in the end.
Well, except for the poor Glaxien crew members who turns out are deadly allergic to dog hair, and the Phlosaks whose skin reacts to dog urine as if it was acid (poor bastard got peed on his face when he lifted a puppy), and the Klaangorians who's very fragile and very vital lower mandible looked like the ideal chew toy for one young puppy. A very uselessly exposed lower mandible if you ask me. Not to mention the many planetary ecosystems that will be seriously messed up by the introduction of a new uncontrolled species.
In fact some would argue that those pesky government regulations were there for a reason, that with time, the Alliance could and would have experimented with the DNA blueprint in a controlled environment and then, given positive results, would have moved on to a gradual and supervised introduction of dogs in the galaxy.
But you know, that's just not the human way to do things. Better to rip the bandage in one go and hope for the best. Surely the Alliance can't fault humanity for what Calvin did, it was for the best, THEIR best and while in retrospect we are kinda sorry about the whole "accidental death by dogs" thing and ruined ecosystems, these are freak occurences, trivial, statistically benign. Like the great Cave Johnson once said, if I put these numbers into my calculator it makes a happy face.
You're welcome universe, we accept your most sincere gratitude and your apologies are much appreciated. You don't have to feel the need to mention it, we're totaly fine. In fact, please stop yelling at us.

I see old posts there about an English language round-table. Does that still exist in Höchst? When and where do you meet? Please post in the replies.
If not, let's re-start one. My intention is not for a casual language training format but for a get-together for those of us for whom English is their first language or official language, for those who have lived in English speaking countries or communities and all those with an international interest who want to connect. Not a dating thing and not a business development thing but just a way for us to connect to our international neighbours in Höchst. PM me if interested an I'll put together a WhatsApp and an email list...
Us: German-American-Japanese family with teenage kids and small dog, moved to Höchst last fall and loving it here...