I got laid off from my last company (video games) in November due to project cancellation by Embracer. 6 months later and I'm still looking, while also trying to find a new apartment since my landlord decided to find a richer tenant. I was only mid-level at my last role and don't have any industry contacts to speak of. I have a hefty amount of savings and could survive for over a year at my current expenses but I want to be realistic. Should I try to secure another 1 bedroom apartment in the same city, or try to downsize to a studio so my savings last an extra 6 months? Or should I entirely give up and move in with my uncle on the east coast for free, which would entail selling everything but what I can fit in my car.

I was involved in a car accident on Sunday, May 12th, 2024, when another driver ignored a stop sign and collided with my vehicle. The driver, who was operating a company-branded vehicle, fled the scene without stopping. I contacted the company via Facebook, and they acknowledged ownership of the vehicle and invited me to a meeting on Monday.
Despite being the victim, I went to their premises, where the dealer principal offered 0 assistance and claimed he didn't want to meet me and accused me of demanding money ( i got proof of him asking to meet) , which wasn't my intention I need my vehicle fixed and liability to be accepted from them
I stated my intention will now be to share my experience on social media, given my relatively new car (with only 7,000 km on the clock) was severely damaged. The dealer principal claimed the company wasn't liable since the accident occurred outside office hours, despite the driver being in a company vehicle and fleeing a scene.
When I asked why the driver fled the scene, he refused to answer. I also requested a substance abuse test, which he declined, saying he wasn't a judge ( I have necessary equipment to prove all of this)
I even asked to meet the driver and she didn't want to meet me.
After sharing my experience on HelloPeter, the company is now threatening me with legal action should i go down this road?, claiming I'm defaming them. I believe this is unfair as they isn't any right or wrong here.
she was 100% wrong for ignoring a stop street as i had right of way on a straight road my tracker even shows i stopped and was at the speed limit
They are liable for the damages to my vehicle, and my wife and 6-week-old child were also in the car."
What do you guys recommend doing moving forward?

I was a huge supporter of Chubbies going back to around 2015 and they became my favorite shorts brand. I discovered them through Nordstrom and after receiving the first pair, I quickly ordered all the other colors they sold as well. They became the only shorts I'd wear and this is still true to this day. Their "Original Stretch Short" in 5.5" was the one I'd gravitated towards. After realizing they had a website and at times offered a minor discount and had occasional sales, I started ordering from them directly.
What I immediately loved was the length, as I never was able to find short of similar length that were flattering and so easily wearable. They were a good quality short made of durable material with the kind of minor details that really displayed the thoughtfulness of the company. These kind of things showed that whoever ran the company or created the shorts really loved and believed in their product. I went on to buy the original stretch shorts in every color available.
After they sold the company, in 2001 I believe it was because that's when some of the minor details of the shorts started to disappear. Some of the most notable changes were the text inside of the fly next to the zipper and the material used for the pocket linings had been changed. This was probably in order to save money or time on manufacturing. However, the core elements of the shorts including the durable material, the quality of the manufacturing and the apperance of the final product, remained otherwise mainly intact. They still seemed to be a worthy product.
Now let's jump to the second half of this past year. I ordered four pairs of shorts and a variety of colors that hadn't been available before or that I just hadn't previously ordered. Due to owning so many pairs of the same shorts in such a variety of colors and their amazing quality and durability, I hadn't even opened any of the packages for the last shorts that I ordered until this past week. After opening the bag with the first pair, they seemed different. I don't know if it was the fact that the weight was off or that they had a weird gleam to the fabric but I immediately sensed that something wasn't right. Once I put them on I could notice that they didn't fall the same as the other shorts and they didn't have the same weight and they just felt like a completely different pair of shorts.
So my friend and I decided to open the bags of the remaining shorts and see if these were the same or if it was just this one particular color that maybe used a different material. We concluded that all four pairs of shorts were now using a new material unused in any of the previous shorts that I had purchased. This material is extremely thinner and has a weird coating on the fabric, that gives it a sort of shimmer. Material is not only cheaper but the quality of the sewing and the stitching is abysmal. The hemming is completely different then the original manufacturing of the shorts as well as the subsequent manufacturing of the shorts that featured less details. Shortcuts in the hemming of the shorts were one thing but that's not even taking into account that the stitching is completely uneven and even frayed and loose in some spots. This was how they came directly out of the bag, never having been worn or touched by anyone previously but the stitching and hemming was already loose or coming undone. Quite possibly we thought this was only the one pair of shorts so we checked the three other pairs from the same order and come to find out that these also have shoddy stitching and lazy him work and were already coming undone at certain points mainly in the hems of the legs and around the waist.
This was highly disappointing to me as I realized that I no longer had a go-to shorts brand and would have to eventually find something else once all the original pairs of shorts that I'd purchased will someday be unwearable due to normal clothing lifespan running it's course. I highly doubt that the company will go back to making a more costly product or one of the quality of their original shorts. It's sad that they cheapened everything about the item yet remain priced the same and higher for other products. I haven't bought many of their other clothing, such as shirts or slacks but after seeing what's become of an item I once really adored, I'm glad I never wasted money on branching out to their other items. I still own over 35 pairs of their higher quality releases and I'm sure it'll take me time to actually wear any of them out but I feel bad for the people now finding this company, and it's a pale, diluted version of what it once was.
As I stated before when I made the order of last year, I hadn't ordered in quite some time I'm not sure really how long it was, so I can't stay the date of when the products certainly transitioned into what it is now. I only know that the order I placed last year that I just recently opened was not the quality of anything that I received previously. It was also the unfortunate sign that I would no longer be shopping with this brand or recommending its products to anyone any longer. The drop in quality was just that vast, so far removed from what they originally had offered. I don't believe now that the shorts should be sold more than $15 a pair and they're probably honestly worth far less than that to manufacture in their current iteration. It's crazy to think that over the years I've spent more than $2,000 on a single product but that's how much I loved them. Just think about how much money I would have spent in the subsequent years replacing and buying the shorts in a variety of new colors released. Sadly, that will no longer be a part of my future fashion endeavors.
I'm a big believer and supporter of brand loyalty, which is exactly why I've bought so many pairs previously but when a brand veers this far off course it has to be recognized and shared with the community who may be thinking they're buying a worthy product. It's almost as if all the praise for the original product has been used and squandered in order to confuse the consumer, like a bait and switch maneuver, and now sell them this cheaper imitation of what it once was. Although I have more than enough pairs to probably wear them for the next decade, I can't get over the betrayal of the drop in quality without a change of pricing to reflect the lower quality material and the completely shoddy manufacturing.
When Chubbies came to be, they brought with them one product that they made unique again using a style of many years past, something that had long been forgotten in men's fashion. Something that was apparently missed by people or at least wanted by those who came of age after the style of shorts had long been enlongated. At that time there weren't many other brands making a stylish and durable pair of short shorts for men. However I have noticed after the success of Chubbies, both mass produced and high end designer brands now occasionally offer shorts of similar length. I cannot vouch for any of their quality or design attributes as I've been so dedicated to chubby's for these past years but I am aware of other brands now offering their take on men's shorter length shorts. If any of the brands are of good quality regularly, I would imagine that these shorts that they've released would be generally the same. So if you're looking for good quality shorter shorts for men I would check with other brands that you have known and trust their integrity of producing a high quality product that doesn't have to cut so many corners and in turn, destroying the legacy of what was once their reason for existing.

Blood cancer is also known as hematologic cancer. Most of the cancer starts in the bone marrow which is the centre of our bones. In the bone marrow stem cells develop three types of blood cells: red blood cells, white blood cells, or platelets. When abnormal cells grow out of control then blood cancer is made. It affects the production and function of blood cells. Normal blood cells fight against infection and carry oxygen through our body. It produces new blood cells and controls bleeding. Main three types of blood cancers there are:
Leukemia is the most common cancer in teenagers & children. It is caused by the fast production of abnormal white blood cells.
Lymphoma affects our lymphatic system which removes excess fluids and produces immune cells in our body.
Myeloma starts in the bone marrow and affects our plasma cells. It is white blood cells that make disease and infection-fighting antibodies in our body.
Blood Cancer Treatment in India
India has major advances in blood cancer treatment. There are quality treatment methods. There are many top-quality hospitals and hematologist surgeons for treating blood cancer. There are different types of treatments required for the patient's overall health. It may include chemotherapy, immunotherapy, stem cell/bone marrow transplantation, and radiotherapy as per the treatment plan.
Blood cancer differs by type and stage but generally, some symptoms include anemia, unexplained weight loss, bone and joint pain, swelling, persistent fever, lumps or swellings, frequent infections, etc.
Blood Cancer Treatment Cost in India
Blood cancer treatment in India could based on different factors, such as type of cancer and treatment plan, hospitalization, tests and diagnostic tools, speed of recovery, etc. The average cost of blood cancer treatment is 2,396 USD.
Best Blood Cancer Treatment Hospitals in India
Blood cancer is common nowadays. India has a lot of the best hospitals for blood cancer treatment. They give the latest protocols by world-class facilities. Some of the hospital's names are given below:
Global Hospital (Chennai)
Manipal Hospital (Delhi)
Jaslok Hospital (Mumbai)
Artemis Hospital (Gurgaon)
Max Hospital Saket (Delhi)
Medanta –The Medicity (Gurgaon)
Top Blood Cancer Treatment Doctor in India
The best blood cancer treatment doctors in India are well known for its good skills and years of expertise in this specialized field. These top doctors give the best blood cancer treatment to patients with hematologic diseases.
Dr. Rakesh Chopra (Director& Head of Medical Oncology)
Dr. Ashok Vaid.(PediatricHematologist & Oncologist)
Dr. Gaurav Kharya (Pediatric Hematologic-Oncologist)
Dr. Dharma Choudhary (Pediatric Hematologist & Medical Oncologist)
Dr. AmitaMahaja (Oncologist & Hematologist)
Dr. P Anoop (Assistant Proffesor & Hemato-Oncologist)
Dr. Rahul Bhargava. Specialty: Pediatric Oncology & BMT Specialist.
Al AfiyaMedi Tour is a leading medical tourism company in India. We offer medical tourism services such as finding the right doctor, the right hospital, and cost estimation for medical treatment in India for foreign patients. Some of the main countries are Bangladesh, South Africa, Egypt, Uganda, Zambia, Sudan, Dubai, Namibia, Iraq, Kenya, Saudi Arabia, Ethiopia, Nigeria, and so on. We provide free medical assistance for TURP surgery cost, lung cancer treatment, breast cancer treatment cost, stomach cancer treatment, arthroscopic surgery, bone marrow transplant cost, best liver transplant hospital, brain tumor surgery, cosmetic andplastic surgery, heart surgery, spine tumor surgery, cancer treatment cost, lung transplant, etc. If you are searching for free medical and healthcare consulting to find the best hospitals and top doctors and surgeons in India for any treatment then contact us- Alafiyameditour.com.
Source: https://alafiyameditour1.blogspot.com/2024/05/blood-cancer-treatment-in-india-for.html

Hey y'all! I am a physical therapist (1st year out of school). I have recently have received an "Examination under oath of provider" from an insurance company that seems to be looking into billing practices with a few dates in question listed.
All the information I've seen online seems to be mentioning euo's for the person who filed the claim to the insurance but not anything for the provider. Can I get some advice as to how to proceed? Can I be sent to jail for this? Id like to know how worried I should be

I applied for a long-term (10-year) Standard visitor Visa at VFS Delhi. This is my second UK Visitor visa after being issued a 6-month one. Worth spending £1000 in my opinion, if you can. Though keep in mind about the risk that there’s no certainty if they will issue the same even if you have paid the amount.
Here’s my timeline.
26th Apr - Biometrics and document submission
(I opted for the “Keep my passport while applying” option which costs Rs 4500)
07th May - Request to submit the passport back in the evening.
10th May - I submitted my passport around 09:30.
10th May - Evening 17:00, I got an email to collect the passport back on the next working day.
Documents I submitted: (Self-Employed)

• Last six months of Attested Savings and Current account bank statements.
• Copy of Previously issued visa, USA, Schengen, UK, Hong Kong (E-Channel approval).
• Last Three ITR’s.
• Itinerary of the dates mentioned in the application.
• GST certificate of my company
• Investment holdings
• Annual Travel Insurance

The company is small and all of the employees are from outside the US despite the company being located in Chicago. They all have over 500 connections on LinkedIn. The website looks ok but only has two pages, one for the home page and one for recruiting. The big red flag is the quotes from people they’ve supposedly worked with from Amazon, CNN, and other huge corporations.
I was initially thrown off because I had applied to an internship with them. They suddenly sent me a message on LinkedIn that I got chosen for an interview. An email wouldn’t have been weird, but this message was. It had a calendar link to pick a time and felt like they were congratulating me on winning a prize. I’m not sure if I should report it or move on, I just would hate for someone to fall for it and get scammed. One other thing is that the credentials for the UX people (and others) is that they have tons of skills, some of them speaking 7 languages, having gone to multiple colleges, and having experience in ever hiring from robots to market shares all in one profile.

I’m a mid 20s woman. This feels like a stupid question to me but it’s a situation i’ve never generally been in before. I just moved locations this year and in my past relationship/town, did all my socializing with my ex by my side so it was always clear I was in a relationship. my socializing is more varied now.
I’ve dealt with not knowing if a guy is friendly or not because they approach me a lot like a girl trying to be my friend would. No flirting, no asking on a date, but asking to just hang out.
For example, say I get along with a new male coworker and i haven’t gotten to mention my boyfriend yet. After a shift or 2 they may ask to hang out. But not one on one which would be a red flag to me. Maybe they invite me to visit them at a bar they work at or a group hang out.
i recently went out for drinks with a few male coworkers after a shift but they knew of my boyfriend. the next time we all went out my boyfriend even joined us. So that turned out well! Are men really just trying to be my friend?

🚀 Unlock Exclusive Insights on HOLO: Get deeper analysis and expert views on HOLO's latest market trends before you read on. Click Here to Dive In 🌟
Technical Analysis
MicroCloud Hologram Inc. (HOLO) closed on May 14, 2024, at $3.23, marking a significant increase of 61.50% from its previous close. This dramatic rise is likely attributed to its recent inclusion in the meme-stock phenomenon, indicating heightened speculative interest. The stock's Relative Strength Index (RSI14) stands at 66, suggesting it is approaching overbought territory but is not yet in a critical zone.
The stock's 50-day moving average of $3.73 is presently above its closing price, and its 200-day moving average of $15.08 indicates a long-term downtrend, which may deter long-term investors. The MACD (3-month) of -0.31 hints at a potential bearish crossover, warranting caution for short-term traders. The Average True Range (ATR) of 27.47 demonstrates high volatility, which aligns with the recent sharp price movements.
For the next trading day, given the high volume of 104.41 million against an average of 8.06 million, the stock is likely to experience continued volatility. Key support levels are identified at $2.95, while resistance stands at $3.68. Intraday movements may test these levels.
Fundamental Analysis
MicroCloud Hologram Inc. has demonstrated a stark divergence between its short-term price movements and long-term fundamentals. With a year high of $113 and a year low of $1.50, the stock has experienced extreme price swings. The market cap remains quite low at $19.19 million, highlighting its micro-cap status amid speculative trading.
The company's Earnings Per Share (EPS) is reported at -51.97, translating to a negative Price-to-Earnings (PE) ratio of -0.06. This negative EPS signals significant profitability issues, casting a long shadow over the company's financial health. The upcoming earnings announcement on May 17, 2024, will be a critical event, potentially providing more insight into the company's financial trajectory.
Notably, a DCF valuation of approximately $0.47 suggests that the stock is currently trading well above its intrinsic value, reinforcing the view that recent price action is driven more by market dynamics than intrinsic worth.
Long-term Investment Potential
Considering the fundamental metrics, MicroCloud Hologram Inc. presents considerable risks. Its consistent negative earnings and severely depressed DCF valuation indicate underlying weaknesses. The stock's classification as a meme stock can result in erratic short-term gains but does not bode well for long-term stability.
Overall Evaluation
Given the substantial recent price increase rooted in speculative trading, the stock's fundamental weaknesses, and overbought technical signals, HOLO is classified as a 'Sell' candidate. The significant gap between its market price and intrinsic value suggests that the current price levels are unsustainable, and investors may look to exit positions before potential corrections.
In conclusion, while the next trading day may continue to display high volatility and potential shor [...]
👉 Dive deeper into our analysis and predictions! CLICK HERE NOW

Hi all,
basically: title.
Been a Diamond/ Master support main back then, mostly have been playing Moira, Ana, Lucio. I quit in 2019 I believe after the vast majority of the people I've played with no longer logged in and had moved over to other games, back to CS or to Valorant. I joined them.
Now I play on console.
Since I deleted my old Blizzard account not thinking I ever would come back (and not having played other Blizzard games either) I had to start from scratch...
Generally, I certainly do enjoy that the game seems to be way faster and less "static" now.
...but holy hell, I can't seem to handle the game anymore.
I'm kind of used to people "reacting" to my calls, e.g. when I'm under attack or even realizing themselves I need help e.g. when enemy Dva running straight past them towards me.
The amount of situations I had with people just completely ignoring this kind of stuff is absolutely mindblowing and honestly, I've been getting focused down harder than what I'm used to when I played in Diamond/ Masters back then.
...and honestly, I had more balanced games in quickplay before I've unlocked ranked. Most of my ranked matches basically has been super lopsided and mostly ended with one team spawncamping the other.
Granted, a lot of this is due to 5v5 and the game being way more faster and believe me, I absolutely LOVE the game being faster...it feels so much better overall than slowly "snaling" your way through the map behind big shields and with too many heals being thrown around.
Also, using a controller now certainly does have some effect as well, it's the main reason I've stopped playing Ana because I cannot aim for jackshit in this game (while not having any issues in other FPS I play on console and I don't know why that is.
How do you effectively heal when you basically get insta-jumped every single teamfight no matter where you are?
Like how am I supposed to keep my team alive when there is Widows and Sombras with a 20+ KDR in the enemy team while most of my teammates just constantly ignore everything going on around and them and just trying to hit the biggest target in their FOV?
On the positive side: I've seen A LOT less toxicity compared to when I played last time and it's quite a nice change. People also seem to switch heroes a lot more often, which I also find a very positive change.
I'm just not sure how to progress.
I don't even care about "rank" or anything, all I want is somewhat "meaningful" and balanced matches, where do I find those?
Some more questions:

1. I seem to have gotten, white, yellow and pink currency, I saw white is for skins and stuff, but what is the pink currency for?
   
2. does console share playerpool with PC? I swear, lots of the DPS I've encountered do NOT use a gamepad since the kind of stuff they do with their crosshair is simply not possible with a controller...I would not bother if I'd see that on PC, but I not play on PC anymore.
   
3. is the PVE mode you can buy for 15 bucks "worth it"?
   
4. What are "hero mastery" missions? I've tried to queue up for them once but matchmaking did fail me.
   
5. skins etc you only can get from the shop now?
   

So I have an iPhone SE 2020. Its been four years. Battery health at 73% and as such the performance is dropping drastically. I am in the mood for an android and settled on the Galaxy A54 but then saw the horror stories that it has to offer. Eventually I landed on the Pixel 8a.
Looked into the reviews for it (and the regular Pixel 8 seeing as how it has been out for a while). As to be expected, the websites praised them. The YouTubers praised them while addressing “some quirks” but I would be stupid to buy based on the opinions of the ones who got the phone for free from the company.
So I started checking here for actual user reviews and… jeez. With the horror stories I am seeing here it makes me wonder how this phone has a community at all! Now I know that 90% of the people who have no issues will never get online to discuss… their phone working. “Hey guys quick update, it’s doing what it does”. I also know that 90% of the people who do have issues will come straight here to talk about it so it can make this phone seem so much worse than it is due to that.
On the one hand I am kinda hoping for suggestions on the best phones in this price range with good cameras but since it is a pixel subreddit I will stay on topic. What is the reality of these Pixels? Never owned a Pixel before. Last android I had was a Moto G6 in 2018 and a Galaxy J7 Sky Pro before that (literal garbage).
Are the pixels really that bad? Do they really heat up like crazy? Is the battery really that bad? Are they really as glitchy as reports suggest? This phone is SO tempting as is but you guys are kind of scaring me off and Im not sure what device I would turn to if this winds up not being a good device. I dont need it to last 7 years, Just 2-4 realistically.
I know that the Pixel8a is tough to tell me about as it is brand new so I am kind of just inquiring about the performance and reliability of Pixels in general. Please please please help me out on an answer. Whether its a collective “yes” or “no” doesn’t matter. I only watch YouTube, HBO Max and use reddit but also like taking pics and selfies so I need a good camera. The Pixels seem tailor made for me at face value and I really wanna join the family, but it had to be a family worth joining.
You have my thanks just for reading this buyers paralysis crisis. Will give double thanks if you could help me out here

TW: Alcoholism, drug addiction, violence, suicidal ideation, sex abuse
This is going to be a LLLLLOOONNNNGGGGG one. This story goes back quite a way, but yesterday was the tenth anniversary of the ending to this story and I'm feeling it, still got some guilt about everything that happened, wondering what I could have done differently and I just want to vent it out and hope to get some closure from it.
This story started in 2010.
Characters in this story (names are fake, duh!):

• Me, Guy, 32M at the time, 45 now.
• My BFF Stephanie, 33F at the time.
• Stephen, 40M at the time, Stephanie's boyfriend.
• Maryse, 27F at the time.

Background and intro
I had known Stephanie for many years and we had the kind of friendship that made her BFs and my GFs uncomfortable to put it lightly. We had never crossed that boundary and I wouldn't consider us in the friendzone, we were just friend, but the kind of friend where she would sit on my lap with her arms around my neck or her head on my shoulder.
At the start of 2010, Stephanie met her then boyfriend, Stephen. He tolerated me and my friendship with Stephanie because I also had a gf back then. She liked Stephanie, wasn't at all jealous of my friendship with her, so he didn't deem me too suspicious. Then my gf and I broke up for reasons unimportant and all hell broke loose for Stephen. He became convinced that I would try and steal Stephanie from him. He insisted that Stephanie introduce me to her female friends or female friends of his. Thus began what I called the year of the 50 blind dates. It was probably closer to 20, but still I like saying the year of 50 blind dates. Most of them were unremarkable and never went beyond the first date. There are some fun stories in there if anyone wants to hear them eventually!
In July of that year, I had to switch gears because I had to focus up and study for a professional exam for a certification important to my career. This exam required close to 600-800 hours of study over a 3-4 month period. So I hunkered down, told Stephanie to stop the blind dates for now because I had to focus on that. She respected my wishes and, other a text here or there, we went low contact for the last two months before the exam.
Except for one fateful night in September. Her birthday was in September and she always threw these big bashes at her house. She would throw a big pool party that started around noon and would go on to the wee hours of the morning. I knew she would harass me to go to her party, so I made some quick math and figured I would lose more energy and time trying to dodge her calls, texts and most likely visits at my place than by just going to the party itself. So when she called me to ask, I just said: "Okay I'll go to your damn party, now git." I texted her I would get there in the evening probably around 8. She texted back "Great, can't wait. Now study, bitch!"
So I ultimately get there around 8PM. Basically everybody is already drunk off their gourd. Stephanie sees me, squeals in excitement and runs to me in her bikini and just jumps in the air and slams into me, wraps her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist and gives me a big hug. I hug her back and just keep walking back to the pool where she had started, carrying her with me. I just duck my head around hers and say hi to Stephen, who just glares at me.
She drops back down and I give her her gift. We chat for a few seconds and says "There's beer in the fridge and food in the dining room." I told her I'd be right back.
I go inside and grab a beer from the fridge. I head to the dining room and the table is against the wall with a buffet of sandwiches, tomato pizza, salads, etc. I grab a plate and start putting food on it. I was focused on the task because I was starving. I barely noticed, sitting at the end of the table one of the most stunning woman I have ever seen. I just see her in my peripheral vision and I do a quick double take, quick glance at her and back to the food. I do that a second time. And finally a third time. At that point she is just straight up staring at me and I can't help but chuckle and whisper under my breath "Subtle Guy, sub-tle".
Thankfully she starts laughing too, saving me some embarassment. I look at her and greet her. She says "Hi, I'm Maryse and I'm guessing you're Guy?" I just nod and we start talking. At that point, I just thought I have no shot with her, she's so far out of my league that I'm just gonna talk to her until she sees one of the "models" hanging out by the pool and ditches me for him.
So I'm not feeling like I'm playing for anything, so I'm just myself and not nervous, just talking to her as I would any friend. We chat and she laughs at all my jokes, she gets all my cultural references. She never gets up or ditches me. The plate of food I had made and the beer I had gotten are sitting on the table next to me untouched, I was too busy with the convo to think about food or beer anymore.
After what felt like only 20-30 minutes, Stephanie comes in and tells me, fake grumpy: "So that's where you disappeared to. I invite my best friend to a party and he spends the whole night talking to someone else." I laugh and go: "What do you mean the whole night? I haven't been here that long." She says "Dude, it's 2AM. You've been here for 6 hours..." My jaw dropped and I just said: "Wow, time flies when you're having fun." Maryse chimes in, with a big smile: "It sure does!" That made me happy as you can imagine.
Now I was a little stuck because where Stephanie lived, there's no night service for the bus and the subway had been closed for an hour or so. I figured I would cab it. So I turn to Maryse and tell her: "It was absolutely lovely to meet you and I enjoyed our conversation very much." She says that she did too. I continued with "At the moment, my schedule is incredibly hectic. I'm basically working full-time, studying full-time and sleeping part-time. So I don't have a lot of free time, but if she was interested, whatever little free time I had, I would love to call her or text her to keep on getting to know her."
I see Stephanie in the backgroudnd, looking like a proud mama at how smooth that came out, knowing I was always anything but smooth with women, as proven by the string of blind dates! Maryse has a big smile and we exchange numbers. I go to Stephanie to wish her a happy birthday again. While I'm talking to her, my phone buzzes with a text from Maryse: "Just checking!"
I asked Stephanie "What's the best cab company to call in this area?" Maryse chimes in: "Where do you live?" I tell her where I lived and she goes "It's on the way to where I live, I can give you a ride if you want." Stephanie raised an eyebrow in surprise. I learned later, she did it because it absolutely was not on the way to her place, like, at all. I say that I would love that as it would give us a chance to keep talking.
We get in her car, driving to my place. We talk, she asks me what I'm studying as I hadn't mentioned it earlier. I tell her all about the boring maths I had to study. Much too quickly, we get to my place. She parks in front of my building and we keep talking. At some point, I tell her: "Normally, this is where I would try to "trick" you into coming up to my place..." She interrupts me: "You wouldn't need to trick me. I'm willing and able!"
I tell her that "As tempting as that sounds, I know who I am and I know that if you come up and things proceed to where they're going, I'm not going to be able to study for the rest of the month. I have a kind of obsessive mind and when I find someone or something I like, I can push everything else to the side in favor of that. So to make sure I can still focus on my studying, I have to go up by myself."
She looks at me, a little disappointed but then says, half-jokingly: "We don't have to go up, there's a backseat right there!" We laugh and I give her a kiss and wish her a good night. I managed to stay strong and go back to my condo. Damn it, why did I have to stay strong!!!
My exam was at the beginning of november. During the month of october, we texted a bunch of times and talked on the phone. We went for coffee a couple of times and dinner once. She respected my boundaries and never pushed for more, which I appreciated but also hated at the same time, if that makes sense. The exam came and it was a monster of a Friday. I slept for basically 18 hours after the exam as the adrenalin dropped and my system crashed.
I texted her when I woke up at around 1PM. She was working at the clothing store Stephanie owned. She said "I'm off at 5PM, wanna meet me." I said: "Duh! Why do you think I'm texting? ;)" So I met her at the store downtown. I asked if she wanted to grab a drink, go for dinner, or what. She proposed going to her place and getting some take out. Stephanie who was closing the store at that moment, came up to us and said: "Hey, so what are we doing?" I said: "WE, that is Maryse and I, are going to her place and getting some takeout. Bye!" I'm sure you'll understand when I tell you that no food was ever ordered that night!
Thus followed a whirlwind month of November where any free time we had was spent together, and I wasn't going to complain!
The troubles
By the start of december, things were still going great with us. One saturday night, we were having dinner at a restaurant and I mention that this coming Friday is my office Christmas party, that it's employees only, so we wouln't see each other that night. She tells me: "Oh sure, that's fine! It'll give me a chance to go see some girlfriends I've been neglecting lately." I said "Great! BTW I also got us a reservation at [this great restaurant she had mentioned a few times] for next Saturday, so we could go there and I'll tell you all about my party and you can tell me all about her night with the girls!"
That was settled, I thought. I was wrong. On Thursday, we had spent the evening together at her place and I was about to leave to go back to my place. She tells me: "So are you coming to meet me at the store tomorrow or do I go to your place?" I reminded her: "Neither, tomorrow is my office Christmas party and we won't see each other tomorrow." She said: "Oh right, I forgot." I asked her if she had made plans with her friends like she had mentioned last saturday. She said that they were all busy tomorrow and weren't available.
She suggested "If your party is boring, maybe you could come meet me." I retorted that it wasn't going to be, knowing who was going to be there.
"Yeah but what if?"
"But it won't"
"But what IFFFFFF?" she kept insisting and I kept saying no. After what felt like 30 minutes of that (probably only 2-3 minutes in reality), I had enough and just said to end the argument: "Okay, if it's boring, I'll come. but it won't be." She said: "Cool" with a big smile on her face. I came to learn that that smile meant "Challenge accepted".
The following night, my colleague and I were pregaming in a conference room before leaving for the party proper and my phone buzzes. Maryse was wishing me a good party. I replied. She texted me again. I replied. She texted again, but I was in a conversation with a colleague so I didn't reply or even look at the phone. My phone buzzes again. Still talking, and didn't want to be rude to my colleague. Another buzz. I just kept talking. Phone buzzes differently, she was now calling because I hadn't answered her texts.
"Why aren't you replying to my texts?"
"Hey, sorry, was talking to my colleague Patrick."
"What? you don't want to talk to me?"
"I am talking to you now."
"Why didn't you reply to my texts?"
"Because it would have been rude to my colleague to pull my phone out while talking to him."
"But you're talking to me now."
"Because I thought something was wrong, maybe it was an emergency."
"I wanted to talk to you, that's all."
"Well, gotta go back to the party. Talk to you later."
She kept texting and if I didn't reply right away, she would call after two or three missed texts. After about 2 hours of this, I stopped answering the texts. When she called back, I asked her: "Aren't you supposed to be working?" which started another round of guilt-tripping of "why are you asking me this? you don't want to talk to me?" At that point I had had enough and wanted to enjoy my party. I remembered that the Blackberry (no shaming old tech!) I had had an annoying feature, but I was hoping to put it to good use at that moment.
Whenever the battery would get really low, like less than 1%, it would let out an ear-piercing BEEP for about 3 seconds, reminiding you to charge it and giving you a heart attack all at the same time. It would do that even when you were in silent mode. It had happened a few days earlier when I was with Maryse. I figured, if I press a button on the Blackberry, it would make a beep too that could be heard through the phone. So while I was talking to Maryse, I pressed my thumb on the space bar for a good 3 seconds and sputtered; "what... the .... what?" trying to put on a somewhat believable performance.
She asked what that noise was and I tell her that it was my blackberry letting me know I was low battery and it might shut off any second. I told her "Listen I'm gonna wish you a good night, I'm having a good time at my party so I'll see you tomorrow at 5PM to go spend our evening together. I hope you have a good....." and hung up mid-sentence. I promptly shut my phone off and went back to the party. I concede that I may be a bit of an AH for that move.
The party was great, I got drunk much quicker than I expected owing to the fact that I hadn't had a drink in over two months because Maryse didn't drink so I didn't either when we were together, and we were always together. At 1AM, I went home and passed out on my bed.
This is another place where I may have been an AH. I didn't turn my cell phone back on and I unplugged my home line too, because I wanted to sleep the deep sleep of the drunkard. I woke up at around 1:30 PM, not knowing it was already too late. In my mind, I was meeting Maryse at 5PM to go out on the town that night. Maryse had other ideas as you'll see.
So like I said, I woke up at 1:30PM and was sticky with alcohol sweat, so I went straight for the shower to get clean again. While in the shower, my stomach grumbled with hunger and I started daydreaming of bacon and eggs. That pushed me out of the shower right quick. I dried myself off quickly, tied the towel around my waist and went to the fridge. No bacon.... booo. Looked at the egg compartment... no eggs... booo again. Okay then, how about a cream cheese bagel. No cream cheese, damn it. Look in the pantry, no bagels.... god. I was starting to get angry. Okay, cereals then. I pick up the cereal box, that mofo was empty and I get mad: "who's the idiot who puts the empty box back in the pantry?" I remembered I live alone.
I close the fridge dejected and see the grocery list stuck on the fridge, taunting me with everything I wanted to eat for breakfast written on it. But I felt like if I went to the grocery store hungry as I Was, I'm just gonna pay 600$ and not get one single healthy thing to eat. I then remembered there's a restaurant next to the grocery store that serves breakfast until 3PM. I get excited! I get dressed quickly, grab my wallet and keys, put my boots on, my coat on, wrap my scarf, my tuque and my gloves and go to the restaurant. If you notice, I didn't mention my phone in there.
I get to the restaurant and confirm that they still have breakfast and get even more excited when she confirms it. I order the "heart attack", at least that's how I nicknamed it: 3 eggs, 3 servings of bacon, 2 sausages, and, I guess to give one peace of mind, fruit (or to be precise, one single solitary slice of orange). Now that the food is ordered and coming I figured I would check if I have any messages. I pat the pocket where my phone always is. No phone. uh-oh. I start clutching evert pocket, no luck.
I wonder if I should go back home after the meal before going to the grocery store and decide against it, it would be too long a detour. So I scarf my breakfast down, rush through the grocery store. I get home and set my bags down in front of the fridge. I go pick up my blackberry. I turn it back on. The little tape icon tells me there are messages on my voicemail, at that time there were no red dots with a number in it to tell you how many.
I connect to the voicemail while starting to put the groceries away. The little automated voice tells me "You have 25 new messages." I pull the phone away from my ear, look at it in disbelief as if saying: "are you f'ing kidding me?" So I press 1 to start playing the messages.
Remember: Maryse knew I was at a party with a dead phone, no chargers and I probably wouldn't get home until 1AM. From 6:30PM, when my phone died, to 11:34 PM, when she went to sleep she left me 9 messages. BTW I know she went to sleep at 11:34PM because she left me a message saying "it's 11:34PM and I'm going to bed. Thinking of you." The 9 messages were in the same vein. These are the salient details, but the messages were all much longer.
She woke up at 7:15 the following day, I'll let you guess how I know that tidbit of information! She left me 5 more messages like those from the day before: 7:15 woke up. 7:35 going to take a shower. 7:55 out of the shower. 8:25 getting ready to leave for work 8:50 walking out of the subway to go to the store.
She leaves me another message at 9 that was different. She sounded very excited as if she had had the best idea in the world: "Hey it's 9AM, I'm about to start my shift. I know we're only supposed to meet after my shift, but what if you came and met me for lunch so you could tell me all about your party." I just did my best Scooby-Doo "Ruh-Roh" and chuckled that I blew that, not thinking the calamity that was awaiting me.
Another couple of messages to talk logistics: "I could take my lunch at 12 or 12:30, let me know which you prefer." "I'm taking my lunch at 12:30"
A slightly worried message: "It's 11:15 and you stil have not said if you were coming or not, are you okay?"
The first bomb goes off and I knew I was in trouble then: "Where are you? We're supposed to meet for lunch and you still haven't given me any sign of life, you're not answering your home phone either, what happened?" Reminder: we were not supposed to meet for lunch, she suggested doing so a couple of hours earlier and I never agreed to anything. I guess she told her colleagues I would meet her for lunch and it was now fact and could perhaps make her look bad in front of her colleagues.
The second bomb drops: "It's almost noon now, WHERE ARE YOU? Stephanie says you're probably sleeping off your drunk, but I don't believe her. I'm sure you got yourself a slut and cheated on me. Didn't you? didn't you, you asshole." Stephanie knows me very well, but that wasn't enough for Maryse it seems.
Ensued four more messages from 12:30 to 1:15, where she starts sounding more and more drunk and accusatory, spewing more attacks like in the message above. At that point I already knew it was over, there was no coming back from that. I can understand having trust issues, but that was nuclear. I don't tolerate jealousy because of horrible experiences with a couple of jealous toxic exes.
A final message comes in, and it's a different voice, that of my best friend being more than a little angry: "Hey Guy, listen, Maryse tells me you had a Christmas party yesterday, so I'm guessing you're sleeping off your drunk, still. But call me when you get this. I put Maryse, who's f'ing drunk, in the backstore so she can dry off and "do inventory". She can't be on the sales floor obviously and I just don't feel safe sending her home in the state she's in. Call me to tell me how you want to handle this."
At that point I had finished putting away my groceries and had put my boots and my coat on and was making my way to the subway to go to the store. I call Stephanie and tell her I got the messages and I was coming. She was right, I was sleeping off my drunk and had just woke up (didn't feel the need to mention the breakfast and grocery store). I ask her if she knows what I'm gonna do when I get there. She says that she knows and understands. She knows my bad history.
When I get out of the subway, I call her again before getting to the store. I ask her how she wants me to do this. It's her store and I don't want to create drama in front of her customers. Does she want me to wait outside and she tells Maryse to meet me in the street or do I go in the store and she takes me to the backstore and I do it there? She says to come to the store.
I walk in the store and every saleswomen on the floor looks at me and gives me the biggest case of the stink-eye. They only have Maryse's side of the story, so they think I did all these horrible things. I see Stephanie in the middle of the store and I walk towards her. She shakes her head and points me towards the cash register. I look over there and see Julia, a salesperson that I've known for a couple of years and really like, who also happens to be the biggest gossip in the store. I understand what Stephanie is trying to do. She's gonna make me tell her my story in front of Julia so Julia can spread the "good news" to the other employees and rehabilitate my name possibly.
So I get to the register and say Hi to Julia. She barely acknoledges me. Steph joins me. She asks me:
"How are you?"
"I was better an hour ago, before I listened to those voicemails. I had gone to our office party last night, had a great night, got drunk off my ass, got home at around 2 and woke up around 2."
Julia asks "Maryse told us you were supposed to meet her for lunch."
"No we weren't. I have a reservation for tonight at XYZ restaurant. I was supposed to take the day to do errands, stuff around the condo and meet her here at closing time. She suggested that it could be fun if I came at lunchtime to meet her, but that was never the plan."
Julia asks again "But why didn't you answer your phone?"
"It ran out of battery last night during the party and when I got home, I was so drunk that I forgot to plug it back in. I only plugged it when I woke up at 2. That's when the messages came in."
Julia asks "She says she tried calling your home line and you didn't answer and your machine didn't kick in."
"Yeah, that one's my fault, I knew I wanted to sleep and telemarketers have a habit of calling me early saturday mornings so I didn't want to be awoken by a call for a rug cleaning service, so I unplugged it yesterday morning, knowing I would be drunk when I got home and forget and be angry if I was awakened by a telemarketer."
Julia gave me a hint of a smile, showing me she was starting to believe me. She asked me a few more questions and then she asked what I was gonna do. I told her that whatever I'll do, I would tell Maryse first.
I looked at Stephanie and said: "Can you open the back store so I can go see her?" So we went to the backstore. As we reached the door, it swung opened and out popped Maryse, looking absolutely terrifying, I actually jumped back when I saw her. Her usual perfect makeup was completely smeared, her mascara streaking down her cheeks from the crying. Her hair was disheveled. She was a mess. Apparently, she had had enough of waiting back there and was planning on leaving the store to go home and had put her coat and boots on.
When she saw me, she went into an unhinged rant about me being an asshole for cheating on her, me not being great in bed, me not treating her right, etc. I let her vent everything she had to say, I looked at Stephanie and apologized for creating such a scene in her store. I tell Maryse we should go outside and talk in private. She keeps on yelling, but when I grab her hand to lead her outside, she follows.
When we get outside, her anger had started to wane a little, or maybe just her energy. I was able to talk to her to explain everything, how I had gotten drunk, had overslept (alone) and woke up at 2PM. I reminded her that we were only supposed to meet at 5PM not for lunch. The anger was leaving her and a smile almost appeared on her face. Through all of this I was being very calm and patient with her, which she interpreted as me not being mad at her. I then said in a firmer tone: "However..." and let it hang for a second.
The beginning smile vanished. I continued: "When you accused me of cheating on you, that broke me. That triggered memories of toxic exes who would always accuse me of cheating, not trusting me when I would tell them where I was, snooping on me, stalking me. Because of those experiences, I have a zero tolerance policy for jealousy. I told her that if she was behaving like after only two months of dating, it didn't bode well for the future and I have to protect myself."
At that, the tears started again and she just turned and ran/waddled away. I told her to wait, but she didn't hear me. I turned towards the entrance of the store to see basically all the employees and customers milling around the door trying to catch the drama. I went back inside to talk to my best friend. The mood had definitely changed and no one was giving me the stink eye anymore, but I didn't really care. I was just sad that it had ended, but proud of myself for having stood up for myself.
So AITA for getting drunk and keeping my phone turned off?
There is a lot more to this story and if you want to learn what happened afterwards, then read on.
The immediate aftermath
So I went back inside the store and talked to Stephanie. I told her that I had a reserrvation for XX restaurant and if she wanted to go with Stephen, she could take it, I wasn't in the mood for a dinner. She said "I already have plans for tonight, but thanks for offering." Julia said she would go with me if I wanted, but I just said that I wasn't in the mood to go out. I just wanted to crash and eat a pizza and get into a food coma.
Stephanie said she didn't feel comfortable leaving me by myself and I should join them at her house. They were having friends over to play board games and it could at least distract me a little. I said why not. So brimming with enthusiasm, I went to play bored games. I left early as I wasn't in the mood. I was feeling a little better, but still a bit down. I thanked Stephanie for the invite and left. I got home and just passed out on the bed.
I woke up at around 7AM the next morning and I saw along the corners of the window the tell-tale signs of a snow-drift and got excited as it was the first snow of the season. I pushed the curtains aside and looked on to see a beautiful white carpet outside. It was early enough that very few cars had marred the whiteness. I was admiring it when I noticed that, against the red bricks of the building across the street, there was a pink blotch. As I focused, the blotch became human shaped and I cleared my eyes enough to realize that it was Maryse and she was raising her cell phone to her ear.
On cue, my phone rings. I pick it up. Still sounding drunk, she asks me if we can speak. I ask her to give me five minutes to get dressed and I'll meet her down there. She asks why she can't come up. I say that I'm not sure I want her in my apartment. She says that it's cold out. I say: "Good, then this will be quick."
I get dressed and meet her outside. I'm still bleary-eyed from having woken up 5 minutes ago, but I try to get my wits together. I tell her that we're going to walk to the subway. It 's a 10-minute walk normally, but with her drunkenness, it might take 15-20 minutes. That's how long she has to tell me what she wants to tell me.
She wants to apologize for accusing me of cheating on her. She says she knows I'm a great guy and... I may be the A-hole at this point too, but I start to drift off in my little bubble and start daydreaming about, if I go back to bed, would there still be some residual heat or would it be cold? I could take a hot shower and warm the bed that way. I could still hear her in the background making excuses, saying how she had been cheated on, but I wasn't really listening.
During the daydreaming I notice it got quite quiet. I look on my left and she's not there, I turn around she's a good 5-6 steps behind me looking angry and she says: "you're not listening" I just say: "when you're right, you're right." I tell her that I understand she's been hurt too in the past, and I hope she can work to resolve her issues, but I was done and I'm going back to bed. I was a bit harsh there, but I was tired and still down.
I walk past her and get maybe 10 paces past her when I hear a scream coming from her. I turn around and I see her messing with something inside her coat. She pulls out a chef's knife with like an 8-inch blade. That wakes me the fuck up. Byebye bleary eyes, hello wakefulness. better than a cup of coffee or a red bull I tell you!
So she's got the knife, she's screaming something that I can't quite understand. She gets quiet and then she charges at me with the knife. If I'm being honest I could have stayed where I was and she probably would have missed me anyways, but someone charges at me with a knife, I'm gonna nope out of there. I take a massive side step and once she gets to where I was and realizes that I'm no longer there, she turns her head towards me and says heyyyyy.
At that point, I have a moment of clarity and see what's gonna happen. She's drunk running one way and looking another, I know she's gonna trip. As I predicted, she stumbled over her feet and starts falling to the ground. I start praying to god and anybody who would listen: "Please don't let her cut herself. I don't want to have to explain this to the doctors, EMTs and nurses. I don't want her drunk ass deciding to take revenge on me by saying I did it."
Thankfully, she winds up in a sitting position on the sidewalk holding the knife up and it was clean. Thank god for small miracles. She starts crying and, other moment of clarity, I know she's gonna turn the knife on herself now. I jump towards her and I realize I was right, the knife starts moving towards her left wrist. I tackle her, grab her right wrist and twist it so she drops the knife. I pick the knife back up and put it in my pocket. She looks at me crying and says: "Why did you stop me?"
I pick her up and take her back to my building. In my building there was a couch in the lobby, so I take her there and I sit her down and plop myself next to her. I look at her and wonder out loud: "What am I gonna do with you? What can I do?"
She goes: "Just let me go, I'll be good." I tell her that's not going to happen. I realize I have three options and I give her the three options.
"So here's the choice I give you.
1- I pull out my phone, call 911 and tell them about the attempted murder back there and they send the police to arrest you. I don't want to do that because that could derail your life and not get you the help you need. Besides, they might not do anything anyway as it's your word against mine.
2= I pull out my phone, call 911 and tell them about the attempted suicide back there and that you need to be placed on a 72 hour hold. I could do that, but at the same time, again it's my word against yours, so maybe they don't believe me.
3- I'm gonna hazard a guess here. From what I've seen, you have alcohol problems. So I'm gonna guess you were in AA, had been sober for a while, I want to say 6 months, maybe less, when we met."
She confirms my guess.
"alright so option 3, I'm guessing you had a sponsor in AA." she nods "we call them up and tell them about your relapse and what happened this morning. Can they come get you and take care of you?"
She takes her phone out and picks a contact and calls. She hands me the phone. Someone answers and I explain the situation. They said they were coming right away. I give them my address, they get here 15 minutes later. Maryse had fallen asleep in the meantime, so I wake her up gently and help her to the car. Off she went.
I went back to my apartment and just crashed back to sleep.
A month later
Mid-january, my phone rings and I see Maryse's number on there. I send her to voice mail. Another call. Voicemail again. 5 minutes later, Private number calling. "Gee I wonder who that could be." Voicemail once more.
Afterwards, I didn't get any unidentified callers for a little over a week. One afternoon, I was at work and my phone rings and it's a number I do not recognize. I pick up.
"Hello."
"Hi, is this Guy?"
"Yes, to whom am I speaking?"
"This is Hannah, Maryse's sponsor. we spoke last month." I started fearing the worst.
"Yes, I remember. How can I help you?"
"Maryse tried to reach you last week and you rejected the calls. I think it could help Maryse if you listened to what she had to say. You're obviously not obligated to entertain her, but I think despite everything that happened, you still care about her or you would not have called me that morning."
"You are right, I do still care about Maryse. I'm just not sure how good it would be for her to meet me this soon after everything that happened. I understand wanting to work through the 9th step and making amends, but..." She interrupts me.
"So you know about the steps."
"Yes I have friends in the program. which is how I could guess that she was in the program too that morning."
"You know it's important."
"I know. I know. How about this: we meet in public at a cafe, you would have to be there. Not necessarily at the table with us, but nearby in case she needs help, in case meeting me causes her pain. Tell her I promise to be in a more receptive mood than I was that morning."
So we make an appointment for that saturday afternoon.
I get to the coffee shop. She's already there, and so is her sponsor. I realize happily that she's not wearing makeup. I say happily because that means she understands that this is not a date, but something serious. She's still stunningly beautiful, and I feel sad almost right away.
I grab a coffee and go join her at the table.
"Hey" I say,
"Hey. So this is gonna be uncomfortable, but thank you for agreeing to meet me and for coming, I appreciate it more than you know. I'm sure you heard I quit the store."
"I have, I'm sorry about that, I hope you didn't do it just because of me."
"No, I needed time to focus on myself for now."
She proceeds to tell me about how I wasn't far off with my guess. She had been sober 4 months when we met. Now she had 39 days. She tells me that in AA, if you are single, they recommend not dating anyone new for at least the first year of your sobriety as it can cause issues, similar to what happened with us. I was like her "drug" and as long as I was available, she could get her fix. But the moment I wasn't available all hell broke loose, and that is what led her back to drinking that day.
I told her I'm glad to see her back sober again this quickly and I hope she can get all the help she needs from it. I ask her if she wants to talk to me about her drinking.
She starts to share a story about how she started drinking at around 11 years old. When puberty hit her, she got into a deep depression because the sexual feelings she was starting to feel were triggering responses. As a child she had been abused by two of her uncles repeatedly and her parents never believed her. They accused her of trying to make herself interesting. That was until they caught one of those uncles red-handed.
They finally believed and took the necessary steps to protect their daughter. But they were poor and they couldn't afford therapy. So she never really got help for it. At 11, she started self medicating the depression with alcohol. When alcohol wasn't enough, she added drugs.
At that point, I was full on crying. She asked me if I wanted her to stop. I told her that she doesn't have to stop. That the tears are there because that was one more thing we had in common. I was also a survivor of sexual assault as a child. In my case, it wasn't a family member, it was only a stranger, so it only happened once. But I also self-medicated with alcohol at the onset of puberty, switching to drugs later on too. I was lucky to avoid the pitfalls of addiction, but I was still dealing with my demons, slowly making peace with them.
So there we were, sitting at a coffee shop, both crying and holding each other. I tell her that I think it's great she's getting help for her alcoholism and addicion, but was she doing anything to help with the underlying issue, the original trauma? She said no, she couldn't afford therapy. I tell her that I am a member of a survivors group and if she is interested, I could get her into a meeting and perhaps learn to heal that part of herself too.
She said that she could give it a try. I tell her I have to talk to the other members to know if I can bring someone new and I would let her know. If they said yes, we would go to her first meeting together, I would introduce her and then we would coordinate so that I never went to meetings where she was. I wanted to do that because I wanted her first few meetings to be about healing and I didn't want our own history to be intertwined or mixed in with that.
After that, we left both feeling content and, while not necesarily happy, at peace if you will. Later on, I contacted Stephanie who was one of the "pillars" of the support group (that's how we met) to ask her if it was okay for me to bring in a new member to the group. She said sure. She asked if it was anyone she knew. I told her she would have to meet her at the meeting if she decides to come.
We were having a meeting the following day. I called Maryse, told her the time and place, and she said she would be there. She came to the group meeting and was shocked to see Stephanie there but Stephanie kinda guessed that it was Maryse I was referring to.
I introduce her, we start sharing stories, talking about how we're feeling, etc. The meeting was good and Maryse liked the vibe. So for the first six months after that, I never saw Maryse and we planned which meeting we would be attending to ensure we didn't cross paths. She started feeling much better.
After maybe 2 and a half years, she finally felt ready and she started dating again. She met someone and she fell for him. They were together for about six months, she looked happy. Unfortunately after about six months, she caught him cheating on her. We tried supporting her, being good friends, cursing his name, doing all the things we could to make sure she didn't relapse. But on April 5th 2014, she ODed on heroin. She was hospitalized for 2 weeks after that.
Hannah took her in and she set up a room for Maryse. She was still in a fragile state, so a group of her friends and I started taking turns watching over Maryse, making sure there was always at least one person there with her to keep her company.
Despite our vigilance, on May 14th 2014, when Hannah was out running a quick errand, she was gone maybe 15 minutes tops, Maryse found a way to cut her wrists and she died. We found a note saying that "the OD was not an accident, and neither was that. Thanks for everything you did for me. I love you all, but I can't do this anymore."
It feels good to write that story (I'll just ignore the fat tears rolling down my face!). Thanks for reading this far and sorry for the long story, I just started writing and couldn't stop. I apologize if it was a bit of a bummer.

I had this baby doll that my mom made me get rid of because I was "too old" to have one. I think about her a lot and now that I'm in college, I think I want to try and find her so I can have the sentiments of my childhood back. I remember so much about her model but I don't know how to locate her.
I would have owned her between 2005-2011 if that's useful at all.
I remember practically everything about this baby doll except for the brand that made her. I can safely say she was not my baby alive, a cabbage patch kid, or anything related to disney or any other major media company. She was just some random, generic brand I guess.
I had her for years and I remember her reeking like that baby powder smell. I remember buying her at a store too and how strongly the aisle smelt like fake baby powder. I can't say for certain but I think the store was either a K-Mart, Target, or Walmart. Though my bet is on K-Mart because we grew up really poor and either my teenage cousin bought her for me while babysitting or my mom may have splurged for it.
She had a really pretty face; it wasn't too realistic or too cartoony. She had really pretty eyes that were teal. Her eyes weren't the ones that would open and close when you lay her down and picked her up, I think they were permanently open.
I think her lips were slightly open too because she had a teal pacifier attached to her clothes that you could soothe her with.
She wasn't ugly. I know that for certain. She didn't have those weird, wrinkly baby doll faces with a really aggressive brow bone/grimace, nor was she dramatically smiling. She had a really perfect face that was tranquil but still joyful.
She wore a teal and white baby-onesie with the feet/socks attached to the outfit, so her whole body was covered except for her arms and face. She had a little teal hat that was sewn into her head. The pacifier I mentioned earlier was attached to her collar with a teal ribbon I believe.
Her arms, legs, neck, and head were a hard plastic but her body was plush and I think made with stuffing. Her back had a battery pack stuck into it too. I knew she was able to move her arms and legs. I think she moved her head too and like giggled, cooed, and called out "mama!" or "mommy!" or something.
It's driving me insane that I can remember everything about this doll but not the brand. I even remember the pose she was stuck in because of her plastic limbs. She kinda perched as if she was being held in your arms. Not quite laying flat, but not quite sitting upright either.
I've already searched through ebay, walmart, and this subreddit trying to find her and i haven't had much luck. does anyone have any leads??
thank you so much for reading this by the way!

Are you tired of struggling with your garage door? Dealing with a malfunctioning garage door can be frustrating and stressful, but fear not! Whether it's a stuck door, weird noises, or just general wear and tear, there are plenty of solutions out there to help you tackle those repair tasks like a pro.
Identifying the Issue:
Before diving into repair mode, it's essential to pinpoint the problem. Is it a broken spring, damaged tracks, or perhaps an issue with the opener? Understanding the root cause will guide your repair process and ensure you're not just putting a band-aid on a bigger issue.
DIY Repairs:
For the DIY enthusiasts among us, there's a plethora of resources available online to guide you through common garage door repairs. From step-by-step tutorials on YouTube to comprehensive guides on home improvement websites, you'll find everything you need to confidently tackle those repairs solo. Just remember to prioritize safety and don't hesitate to call in the pros if things get too complicated.
Tools of the Trade:
Having the right tools can make all the difference when it comes to garage door repair. Invest in a good quality set of tools, including wrenches, screwdrivers, pliers, and a sturdy ladder. Additionally, safety gear such as gloves and safety glasses should never be overlooked. Safety first, always!
When to Call in the Pros:
While DIY repairs can save you time and money, there are certain situations where it's best to leave it to the professionals. Complex issues like broken springs or malfunctioning openers can be dangerous to tackle without the proper expertise and equipment. Don't hesitate to reach out to a trusted garage door repair company if you're unsure or uncomfortable with handling the repair yourself.
Maintenance is Key:
Prevention is always better than cure, and the same holds true for garage doors. Regular maintenance can help prevent issues before they arise, saving you both time and money in the long run. Simple tasks like lubricating moving parts, tightening bolts, and keeping the tracks clean can significantly extend the lifespan of your garage door by

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Share Your Tips:
Have you recently tackled a garage door repair project? Share your tips, tricks, and success stories in the comments below! Let's help each other out and keep those garage doors running smoothly.
Remember, a little maintenance goes a long way when it comes to garage doors. Stay proactive, stay safe, and happy repairing!

I am only just starting my driving lessons soon & although I'd love to travel & dot his pernamently, my main motivator for van life this year is money. So I don't want to get a big van where I can get my dream of having a seperate space for the toilet & the dogs if it's going to cost a lot more monthly.
I'm 24 but with this being my first vehicle, my insurance is already going to be very high.
I'll be buying the van outright when the time comes.
Is the road tax, insurance & petrol money generally a LOT more? Can someone give me a guess of how much more between the 3 types of vans?

Did a job for a client 10 years ago who is a painter. Roof/exterior needs restoration so I gave him a buzz using the number on his public Facebook business page. He came out a fortnight ago, had a look, quoted $9500 cash for the lot, I said sounds good.

• He texts asking for a 20% deposit, which I paid. ($1900)
• Maybe an hour later he asked if I can pay a little more, saying he is waiting for a woman's mortgage company to release funds to pay him. He said I didn't have to if I was uncomfortable. I pay a further $1000 (30% deposit)
• He texts yesterday saying his friend died over the weekend in a car crash and that's he's in another city currently comforting the family. I said ok, my condolences, why you telling me this? He said that he thought the job was to start Monday just came and I said no, it's Monday next week. He said sorry, mind all over the place, we are still on track, and asked if I could spare more deposit so he could help the grieving family who are waiting for the deceased's insurance to come through. Again, he said I didn't have to if I was uncomfortable, but I felt if I said no he could be resentful if he does do the job and do a shitty job in revenge. He suggested $500, I sent $300. He said thanks, and now the total is $3200 or the equivalent of a 33% deposit.

Looked him up with QBCC as bells started ringing. No current licence (previously held one), which I guess why he was keen to not give a paper trail, but it just adds to this uneasy feeling that perhaps there's red flags? He's also been done for unlicensed contracting before.
Now, you don't need a licence to paint your own house however legally a contractor must yet I have no doubt he'll do a good job (Facebook page is full of his work which looks superb, hasn't fled the city due to bad reputation and good reviews), but do I have right to be concerned? To be fair, the start date hasn't come and gone yet and if he doesn't it may be a pain to get the money back (small claims court, sure, but time consuming. Perhaps threat of QBCC report for: unlicensed contracting, excessive deposit, no contract, advertising where the fines themself would be far more than my $3200).
Am I being crazy or no cause for concern yet? If there is cause for concern, how should I approach this with him?
Cheers.

Question for those who work as nurses in Washington state! My partner and I are looking to move from Utah to Olympia, Tacoma, Seattle, or Vancouver area. We are both nurses who have med surg experience. From researching, it seems like the best hospitals to work at are:
-St. Joes -Tacoma General -Harborview -UWMC -Valley med Renton -Everygreen Health Kirkland -Peace Health Southwest
If anyone has good or bad experiences please share!
We’ve also considered moving to Oregon… if anyone has any feedback about working there as well it would be much appreciated!!