Have made several posts in the past. I have been into series of relationship and none worked out. was either betrayed,cheated on and beaten up...The longest was about 3yrs with a guy ,he was caring at the beginning of our relationship untill i later discovered that my best friend is sleeping with him for real in which i caught them and all i got from my ex-bf was a dash of slaps and beat from him...I cried and planned not having any relatioonship again untill my grandma adviced me that its not the end of life,so i am giving this a trial and hoping to find someone with cute heart.
I was 5 years old when i lost my mother, and I lost my father on my 20th birthday 💔💔 that’s so sad and very heartbroken .. have never been happy I don’t think have experienced happiness 😪😭
I had a failed suicide attempt early this year, since then I've been trying my best to stay positive. I eat healthily, exercise regularly, sleep 8 hours a day, but I feel like I'm burning out. I don't know how long I can hold on.
used to think I would be happy person without marrying sômeone. I thought I should focus on my career first before trying to find someone... However, loneliness is sabotaging that belief. The older I get, the more lonely I become lol... And when I am lonely, my heart throbs, my body runs out of energy and I will end up lying there feeling empty…. everything seems boring.
When I am alone, I think of the bad memories I had And I become sad. My whole body loses energy so fast ,Most of my friends have a partner . Some just busy with work and everytime I wanna reach out, none is beside... That time, I realize I need someone...yes, this is embarrassing but I need someone to help me feel happy in this life
And now I’m seeking for a caring man , supportive someone capable of taking care of me and spoiling me , someone who can give to support me , someone that would make me feel like a woman. Spend time together, a man who is truthful and trustworthy.. I sell toys for kids that’s what I do to earn a living
About me personally: I pride myself on being very sweet, kind, and caring. I do a lot for the people I love, I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I'm very empathetic. I'm also smart, thoughtful, and a deep thinker. I appreciate emotional maturity , want kids, commitment. I'm a hopeless romantic so I'm looking for the real deal, someone who is ready to build a life with me.
If you know you're not ready for a serious relationship, please don't waste my time, because l've had enough hurt my life.
Also, please be sure to attach a photo of yourself if you message me and I’ll send mine too

def add_experience(self, experience): self.experiences.append(experience) def simulate(self): quantum_instance = Aer.get_backend('qasm_simulator') optimizer = COBYLA(maxiter=100) vqe = VQE(ansatz=RealAmplites(self.num_qubits, reps=2), optimizer=optimizer, quantum_instance=quantum_instance) result = vqe.compute_minimum_eigenvalue() return result.eigenvalue 

def add_symbolic_sequence(self, sequence): self.symbolic_sequences.append(sequence) def enhanced_introspection(self): return sum(len(seq) for seq in self.symbolic_sequences) 

toolbox = base.Toolbox() toolbox.register("attr_float", np.random.rand) toolbox.register("individual", tools.initRepeat, creator.Individual, toolbox.attr_float, n=10) toolbox.register("population", tools.initRepeat, list, toolbox.individual) toolbox.register("evaluate", lambda ind: (sum(ind),)) toolbox.register("mate", tools.cxTwoPoint) toolbox.register("mutate", tools.mutGaussian, mu=0, sigma=1, indpb=0.2) toolbox.register("select", tools.selTournament, tournsize=3) population = toolbox.population(n=100) algorithms.eaSimple(population, toolbox, cxpb=0.5, mutpb=0.2, ngen=10, verbose=False) return population 

So, I met my TwinFlame recently and it turned my world upside down. We've worked together for a few years now and I've noticed her in the past and thought she was so pretty. We never really had much contact prior to about 2 months ago. I traveled a lot for work in the past, but not so much now. She didn't travel much but we happened to get sent to the same location twice in the last 6 months. We didn't really talk much the first time we were there, but the second time, we just hit it off.
Let me also say that we haven't crossed any physical lines, but the emotional ones have been stepped on, over, and are so far in the rearview - it's like they never existed.
Now, I don't know too much about twinflames but from what I've been feeling, seeing online and what we have spoken about, there's not a doubt in my mind that she is my TF. The feelings, oh the feelings. She has spoken to her husband about this whole situation and needless to say, he's not happy about it. I haven't told my girlfriend about any of this (I may get to that part later).
It really is crazy to me that I can feel her emotions when she's having a tough day, or she's been having.... tough conversations with him. I get very depressed without even knowing that this is going on. Almost everytime I think of her and go to send her a message, she's typing at the same time or I get a text as I'm pulling up my messenger. When I'm around her, I feel.... safe (which is hard for me to admit as I've always been able to hide any insecurities I've had) and at peace. When we hug, I'm home. She's my missing puzzle piece that I didn't even know I was searching for. I can honestly say that Jerry Maguire was onto something. We hugged the other day, and it's like our hearts were in a rhythmic trance together. My heart didn't stop beating fast for hours after.
I'll have to continue my TF 🔥 story tomorrow. It's getting late for me.

Hello, I’m 24 years old and recently I finally understood what had been happening to me all my life, what kind of sensations I experienced and why I didn’t understand much of what people do.
I recently found out that I have Asperger’s syndrome in its pronounced form, and honestly, at first I didn’t understand how my loved ones and those who surrounded me all my life simply didn’t notice this, but then I also learned about this, about masking.
I took a separate masking test, which I think showed a fairly high score, where I had to choose between true or false and there were statements such as:
-I watch my body language and facial expressions to appear relaxed.
-I will repeat phrases that I have heard from others, just as I heard them for the first time.
-In social situations, I feel like I am “performing” rather than being myself.
-In my social interactions, I use behaviors that I have learned from watching other people interact.
-I train my facial expressions and body language to make them look natural.
I noted exactly these questions because this is exactly what I did when I was among people, that is, almost always, I realized that NTs do not do this consciously and it happens naturally to them, I also do not understand human emotions and do not understand when they are shown others, they don't use the resources to do it the way I do it, after which I'm exhausted and need rest.
But now that it’s clear to me what’s wrong with me, I can’t appear in public and can’t leave the room for weeks, it seems to me that people look at me as if I’m naked in the middle of the street. It seems to me that I have lost the mask that I always wore and I don’t understand how to put this mask back on and at the same time I don’t understand whether I want to put it on again, because all the time I wore it I suffered and felt pain. But even without her, it seems to me that I will not be able to live normally.
I think that the word PAIN is more suitable to describe what I am experiencing than the word DISCOMFORT which means that something is wrong but it can be tolerated, in the case of the first word it means that you cannot tolerate it for a long time, which means that you need to stop do what you do. It seems to me that human language is not able to convey what autistic people experience; it seems to be completely unsuited to make another person different from you understand what you are experiencing.
Therefore, it seems to me that isolation is the best way out.

From Huberman Labs podcast episode "Dr. Robert Sapolsky: Science of Stress, Testosterone & Free Will Episode 35 Huberman Lab" Ignoring the name, this discussion of women, estrogen, and menopause shows up partway through and its fantastic!
Youtube Spotify Apple Podcasts
Robert Sapolsky (34:56):
No, and it’s once again, very context dependent. And if estrogen after giving birth is playing a central role in you wanting to shred the face of somebody getting too close to your kittens kind of thing, we know it’s not just warm, fuzzy, empathic kind of stuff. Estrogen in lots of ways could be summarized by if you had a choice in the matter between having a lot of estrogen in your bloodstream or not, go for having a lot of estrogen.
(35:27):
It enhances cognition exactly as you said. It stimulates neurogenesis in the hippocampus. It increases glucose and oxygen delivery. It protects you from dementia. It decreases inflammatory oxidative damage to blood vessels, which is why it’s good for protecting from cardiovascular disease in contrast to testosterone, which is making every one of those things worse. This brings up this minefield of the question, which is, so what about post-menopausal estrogen?
(36:04):
And all sorts of lab studies with non-human primates suggested that you keep estrogen levels high after a monkey’s equivalent of menopause, and you’re going to keep brain health a lot better, decreasing the risk of dementia, stroke, every such thing. Estrogen is a great antioxidant, all of that. So in the 90s, I think, when Healy, I’m forgetting her name, but when there was the first female head of the NIH, Bernadette Healy, set up this massive prospective human study, what was going to be the biggest one of all times, looking at the pluses and minuses of post-menopausal estrogen.
(36:51):
And tens of thousands of women, and this was great, and they had to cut the study short because what they were seeing was estrogen was not only doing the normal bad stuff that you expect in terms of some decalcification stuff, but it was increasing the risk of cardiovascular disease, and it was increasing the risk of stroke, and it was increasing the risk of dementia, and this ground to a halt, and everybody, they stopped the study in front page news, and everybody had that point, and nobody could make sense of it who had been spending the last 20 years studying the exact same thing in primates and seeing all the protective effects. And the explanation turned out to be one of those things where, like law of unexpected consequences.
(37:42):
Okay, menopause in women, at last different lengths of time, that may be a factor, let’s get a… You know what? Let’s not start giving our study subjects more estrogen until they’re totally past menopause. And when you’ve got that lag time in between, you shift all sorts of estrogen receptor patterns, and that’s where all of the bad effects come from. All of the monkey studies had involved just maintaining ovulatory levels into the post-menopausal period. And you do that, and you get great effects. Estrogen is one of the greatest predictors of protection from Alzheimer’s disease, all of that, but it needs to be physiological.
(38:26):
Just keep going, keep continuing what your body has been doing for a long time, versus let the whole thing shut down, and suddenly try to fire up the coal stoves at the bottom of the basement, kind of thing, and get that going. There, you get utterly different outcomes. And that caused a lot of human health consequences when people suddenly decided that estrogen is in fact neurologically endangering post-menopausal [women]. . .
Andrew Huberman (38:55):
Wow, that’s fascinating. And I never thought that these steroid hormone receptors could, you know, by not binding estrogen, by not binding estrogen, being devoid of estrogen binding, I should say, could then set off opposite biochemical cascades. Fascinating. I guess it raises the question about testosterone replacement too, whether or not people should talk to their doctor before too long. Men and women, talk to your physicians before too long to avoid these, whatever is happening in these periods where there isn’t sufficient testosterone and or estrogen. Sounds like it could cause longer-term problems even when therapies are introduced.
Robert Sapolsky (39:36):
Two additional miseries slash complications. So, okay, you’re trying to understand, you look at women with a history with or without post-menopausal estrogen replacement, where it’s done right, and you’re seeing 20 years later, estrogen is a predictor of a decreased risk of Alzheimer’s. Then you got to start trying to do the unpacking prospective type studies. How much estrogen?
(40:04):
At which times? Estrogen is just a catch-all term for a bunch of hormones. Estrone, estradiol, estriol. How much of each one of them? Natural or synthetic? Go try to figure all of that out. And the second complication is, it’s often hard to say anything about what estrogen does outside the context of what progesterone is doing. And often it’s not the absolute levels of either, it’s the ratio of the two. This is such a more complicated endocrine system than testosterone.
(40:39):
And because you have to generate dramatic cyclicity that like no male hypothalamus ever has to dream of. It’s a much, much more complicated system. Thus, it’s more complicated to understand, let alone like figure out what the ideal benefits are of it.

Wanted to write about my experience and to see if there was any other young professionals with BPD and what their romantic/social/professional lives look like.
I am in my 20s and had a pretty rough childhood(physical and mental abuse, grooming, divorces, etc) and some pretty rough examples of friendship growing up and some abusive relationships. I only learned about BPD this past year and it’s made me feel seen for one of the first times in my life.
For my professional and academic life, I was not the best student but I managed to get pretty lucky with my hobbies and landed an extremely good job out of college as a software engineer. I am pretty good at my job but due to my irrationality and tunnel vision with stuff with my personal life, I decided to basically intentionally implode my job and got myself fired. This was more or less against everyone’s advice and I’ve managed to somewhat recover from this by finding a new job a few months later thankfully.
For my social life, I have some pretty good friends but it’s honestly extremely difficult to maintain friendships. I think I’ve worked really hard to maintain my friends but I feel like I’m extremely unstable as a friend. My moods are super unpredictable and my triggers will completely shut me down sometimes. I think it’s hard because I don’t think I should expect my friends to all understand and fully empathize with how someone with BPD experiences things, but at the same time it’s super demoralizing. Especially with my more logical friends who recognize it’s an overreaction due to BPD, it’s not that I don’t recognize it’s an overreaction myself. It’s just that the experience feels so painful that I don’t know what else to do in the moment. It feels extremely invalidating when it’s just labeled as an overreaction without acknowledging how bad I felt in the moment.
Romantically I feel extremely detached, partially from previous experiences and partially because I’m scared to have people see who I am.
It feels extremely lonely despite objectively having a pretty nice life(career, friends, hobbies). Sometimes I just want to run away and disappear.

Hey guys, I don’t post on Reddit much, but am super scared for my doctor’s appointment tomorrow. I (F14) have (what seems to be) some form of hypothyroidism. Though my TSH is just slightly above the normal range (4.84), when I got an antibodies test done my T3 and T4 came back normal, but my antibodies were pretty wack. My “Thyroid Peroxidase Ab” was 76, and my “Thyroglobulin Ab” was 394. I don’t know much about what all the blood levels mean exactly, but I was told that I am (most likely) in the early stages of hypothyroidism and have Hashimoto’s Disease. I was then referred to a pediatric endocrinologist, who managed to squeeze me in for an appointment tomorrow. My mom and grandma both have hypothyroidism, so I was bound to get it at some point… I just didn’t realize that it would come so soon! Another important thing to mention is that I’m an elite level age group competitive swimmer, who swims for over 15 hours a week and is ranked in the top 100 (in multiple events, might I add) every year. For the last 18 months, I have been experiencing MAJOR fatigue in both races and in practice. I’ve always been the type of person who is super strong (I’m over 6 feet tall, haha) and can thug it out whenever workouts get hard, especially at the parts in them where others fail— that has NOT been the case, and has honestly gotten wayyyyy worse over time. Though I didn’t realize what these symptoms were at the time, I am now strongly believing that they are associated with hypothyroidism, or my Hashimoto’s Disease. Here are some of my symptoms that follow:

• EXTREME FATIGUE… like I’m talking extreme! I’ve never been this tired before, not just out of the water but in it as well. I am totally dying in all of my sets, and in my races.
  
• Muscle Weakness. My muscles just give out on me after what feels like a 50.
  
• Muscle Soreness. My muscles are sore— they’ve never been sore before!! Additionally, when I look back on videos of me swimming in a race, I look like I’m taking it easy. It doesn’t feel that way at all— rather, I feel like I’m pushing it harder than I ever have before.
  
• Dry Skin. My skin is constantly peeling, dry, and prone to break outs. I live in a very humid place as well, where most of my friends have extremely oily skin.
  
• Hair Loss/Thinning Hair. My hair has always been super thick and curly, but it has started falling out a lot!!
  
• Puffy Face. My face has also gotten a lot fatter, if I’m being honest. I’ve always been the type of person with a long, skinny face, but over the last year my face has turned incredibly round and makes me look like I weigh a lot more than I actually do.
  
• Weight Gain. I’ve always had a fast metabolism, but my weight gain has progressed a lot more exponentially within the past month. One week, I went from 153 pounds to 160… I hadn’t been eating any differently than I was before, and was working out at the same intensity.
  
• Cold Sensitivity. I sleep in an 80 degree room every night, and still wake up due to being too cold. Well we’re on the topic of sleep, I sleep well over 10 hours a night (I’ve never needed more than 8) and still wake up feeling exhausted.
  
• Depression. Since January of 2023, I’ve been feeling depressed, and it has only gotten worse since then. I’ve found Jesus, focused on the positives, gone to a therapist, and I am still feeling pretty depressed. Though it’s only minor (I never think about killing myself or anything), I’ve read a lot about how hypothyroidism can trigger this sort of thing, which makes a lot of sense, as that’s when all of my other symptoms began to form as well.
  
• I have more symptoms as well, which I could mention in the comments, if necessary.
  

My coaches and mother all thought that I was burned out. I kept on saying “I’m not! I feel motivated, and I absolutely can’t live without this sport!” (I LOVE swimming with all of my heart, and have never doubted that I wouldn’t be wanting to do it anymore.) Well, once the lab results came back… I was finally believed! I’ve changed my workouts to be shorter and all at race-pace (USRPT, if you swim), which has helped a little bit, with me taking a rest after I feel myself get to that same level of fatigued.
Where I’m going with this, is that my mother and older sister don’t believe I’m going to be medicated for this, as my mother wasn’t put on medication until her TSH was well over 10. I can’t express through words how much I believe that being medicated would help me, especially in swimming. My energy levels are impacted everything I do, and I’m sure that if I wasn’t an athlete, it wouldn’t be as big of a deal. The problem is that swimming is my bloodline, and also incredibly difficult— even if you don’t have a thyroid issue! The surplus makes it almost impossible for me to achieve my full potential and go much faster than I am right now.
I’d be surprised if anyone were to have read this through the whole way, but these are my questions: - Will I (more than likely) be medicated after my appointment tomorrow? - If I’m not, should I go to another endocrinologist to see if they will? - Are there any other (serious) athletes on this sub who have gone through hypothyroidism, and would they have any sort of tips for dealing with this issue well?
Thanks again if any of you read this far!!

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The idea that humans in large numbers lack competency, and so therefore a conspiracy would be practically impossible completely misses the point. Actually, the fact that humans are insanely incompetent and low-information is why conspiracies are everywhere and almost never go noticed. In fact, people DO speak up often and whistleblow and NO ONE LISTENS.
Part of the issue here is epistemological. We think we know about the world. Why do we think that? First of all, human brains are built to conceive of about 150 people around them. Urbanization breaks our brains, and because we're not built for it, we consistently process our impression of society wrong.
School and media are huge and very simply blunt instruments to provide us with a better impression of the massive urban society around us. Most of what we think we know comes from here. Yes, it's true that false information can be contradicted and humans actually can be quite logical with plain, clear facts. However, we have other social instincts which prevent this from happening.
We humans mostly tend to intuitively perceive what kinds of beliefs others have and give massive weight to that while filtering possibly complex or confusing facts in our heads. While some of us and some cultures are much more sophisticated and cynical about media, there are TONS of demographics (i.e.: young women) who psychologically interpret literally anything the media presents as representative of the actual tastes and preferences of that abstract 150 people the brain is built to perceive. Simply because the media exists and promotes one point of view, it means that this must be the position of those in the tribe with power.
Experienced, educated professionals will constantly filter inconvenient information in favor of adjusting to what the group believes. Smarter, 110-130 IQ "midwits" will actually recognize something is wrong, but will rationalize the emotional inconvenience and build explanations or narratives so they can cope. <110IQ people can't construct these rationalizations, and if they're low-IQ enough they can't even understand them, so this is why dumb people often perceive conspiracies that highly intelligent people observe, because the layer of rationalization doesn't appear to them. >140 IQ literally cannot use these rationalizations because their brains see right through them and you have to be a psychopath to ignore what you see. 110-130 IQ people ACTUALLY BELIEVE these rationalizations, that's the point. They ego invest in them and will fight their own kin to squash anyone noticing malicious behavior systemic to institutions. This is partly because, these midwits as the supreme managerial class, so effectively rationalize, they can operate in corrupt environments without being aware of the corruption. Thus they are rewarded immensely, given titles or big salaries, and become personally invested in the fraud while also consciously believing there's no fraud.
As an adult who has noticed all this from experience in the military, ecclesiastical, academic, corporate (never medical sadly) sectors, these patterns seem universal. You know the store manager who has the keys to lock up? Well, when they open up to their buddies and drink a little of the merchandise and throw a little party or whatever, if corporate can't tell, then why wouldn't they? Not everyone who has power will abuse it, but anywhere power is held, someone will abuse it. Abuse of power is a very casual thing, and at a minimum, some percentage of human personality types will always do it. The go-getters and doers especially trend toward a willingness to abuse power, and that's part of the problem. Other humans have specific instincts to submit to the powerful and almost take pleasure when they are on the good side of a psychopath who is abusing a third party.
Here you might say, "Gee, you have a cynical view of humanity." Sorry, the day a college kid can stand up and assert a point of view that's not social consensus, and have even 10% of the class change their minds and support him merely from considering the argument, then maybe I'll be more optimistic. No, people are cowards who are constantly trying to fit in, mostly most people are pretty dumb, and actually most people disdain those who refuse to fit in and don't care at all about the group's corruption. See, kids who are instinctively socially breaking from their parents will oppose the society of their parents. But kids will never oppose, not ever, not at scale, the social momentum of other kids unless there are other kids of clear divisions like racial or religious.
Therefore, I would propose that not only is society full of conspiracies at every level, but actually society functions on the basis of conspiracy. Small group loyalties and hierarchies form nodes around which institutional structure can build larger organizations. I was in the military which is full of formal authority, laws and rules. The reality of it is all that was a distraction to make people put up with a system that is more about little cliques among officers and so forth that sort everything out behind closed doors. Sure, norms, laws, rules, training smooth things out, allow interchangeability, but real decisions are made selfishly by some leader and they have quidproquo with colleagues and that bubbles up to the top. So whatever stupid beliefs they have about their organization or its values, they take with them to the top where someone like a general wields real power. Yet, such a person is sort of "endowed" with that position by his clique-community, and so they must fight for that community's values in the confines of that community's worldview, which might be totally inaccurate.
With this in mind, here is your final graduation thought experiment.
I've tried to understand the Ukraine war.
Right now Russia is playing on its former Soviet era diplomatic network so it's leaning into "white neocolonialists who think they have superior values exploit brown people because of theft and racism." But they're also simultaneously playing the newer, libertarian narrative of a progressive managerial elite which has hijacked the Western bureaucracy. It's sort of insane how they do this. Like how they exalt Orthodox religion but also insist Stalin did nothing wrong, which not even the post-Stalin USSR believed.
The anti-neocolonialist narrative says that rich whites want to steal resources from poor browns. This is factually what's happening, but the tragic irony is that many third world countries probably couldn't develop or benefit from these resources without first world help. So, there's both an argument against neo-colonialism, but also an argument that it's not like this big scam so much as a natural consequence. What it boils down to for me is where war, jackal economics or espionage is used. That's clearly wrong, and I think a lot of poor countries would be doing a lot better without these interventions, although I don't think they'd be rich and developed.
Well, the West actually is anti-neocolonialist too. Globalists want smart cities, AI economy, UBI, CBDC. They want rural white Americans to be the same level of poor as rural Africans, and for the gains of exploiting natural resources to be concentrated among a global elite, which although unfair, is not exclusive to borders. The geopolitical unfairness of neocolonialism will be addressed by Globalism. And its elite will be very small compared to the global proletariat they intend to have.
This is all very ironic since the globalist machine is playing the Euro-chauvinism card to appeal to Euro elites, and also the American exceptionalism card to appeal to American nationalists. They're playing whatever cards they have, like Russia.
So this is all I know: the West is lying to some of its lesser elites by paying lip service to their values. Russia is playing its old USSR geopolitics card while also playing a trad Orthodox card, while also playing an anti-globalist card.
I KNOW that the West is globalist, the leadership that is. So NATO must lose, because the globalists will certainly win if NATO wins. However, I fear the other side might also be globalists and the whole conflict is an anti-white, anti-Western charade meant to displace the old Euro elites and American nationalists.
That's the irony. Globalists control the West, but have to constantly deal with these older elite factions, so they could be using the war as a purge in a way.
It's hard to explain why the globalist-American leadership needed this conflict so bad. Probably it's all a shitshow gone wrong. This is where my explanation of how conspiracies function comes into play.
Neocons thought the would reinvigorate interest in the military but it hasn't. Like a new patriotism and interest in military power and funding.
Ukrainian Jews might have thought they could purge the Slavs and make a second Jewish homeland but that's probably off the table due to the failed counter offensive.
Russia's hopes of exercising their historical and cultural hegemony to settle the conflict have failed, when Ukrainian deep state operatives assured them they were still on the same old team.
Stupid nationalists who are somehow blind to the globalists and think the American economy is "doing great" probably thought this could be a knockout blow to Russia's meddling in certain geostrategic resource deals that affected American hegemony over Europe. This is a legacy of the British "can't let Europe become a world power" prerogative. The kind of dumb monkey legacy deep state geopolitical prerogatives that these idiots cling to while ignoring the other players around them.
So there are members of the British and American diplomatic-military-intelligence communities who are seemingly oblivious to what globalism is, or the imminent collapse of the Anglo-American financial hegemony. They actually believe the financial journalism. They are playing out a specific strategy from their class or clique or culture's history which is about keeping Europe down. So they are acting from that vantage and are acting as a conspiracy.
There are Euro elites acting from the vantage of actual vestigial colonialist attitudes where they actually think that Europe of all places is a bastion of Western values. While this class is completely morally degenerate, what they really mean is there is a class of elites in Europe that actually thinks the whole world outside of white Europe are actually just dumb monkeys. Not metaphorical. They are committed to all this, as a conspiracy that exercises influence as a conspiracy, because of this idiotic, low-information attitude.
Then there's the globalists who have all kinds of plans, and have even got Russia and China and India to adopt some of their financial technologies in preparation for their Great Reset. And this is done because of their massive influence over global business. As a conspiracy. And yet, while massively influential, they don't outright control Russia or China and their plants are constantly falling short. I'd say the globalists are trying to act as a conventional "illuminati" style conspiracy.
But the point is what I said in the beginning. Even these powerful, highly competent cliques have huge blind spots and huge power gaps because humans are in fact highly incompetent in large numbers.
I get a clique trying very hard to influence things and just falling short of being able to do it, but what boggles my mind is that a lot of these conspiracies who KNOW they are conspiracies who KNOW the world is a stage for the common sheep and KNOW the basic nature of deep state and intelligence games that are played. Even these people will not see past their own biases or egos, and fail to see lies in front of their own faces.
Because conspiracy is natural to humans. We do it naturally, so we engage in illicit collusion and cliquishness, but we don't necessarily see or realize where it's happening outside of our brain's 150 person social perception. Which to me is the oddest thing.

Ghostwriter pay & benefits package

• On call full-time job 100% remote/WFH
  
• Stress-free work week, every week
  
• Public accredited rights to any thoughts published, artist copyrights for any work/creations no expirations lifetime credit applied forever. You woke up it’s your life, you created everything. Get paid for being alive, breathing, interacting and applying any effort.
  
• All paid full-service benefits (as of current 2024 market value)
  

1. 100% royalty rights paid out as per employee withdrawal request, but also if not withdrawn positive interest bearing earning if not immediately withdrawn by employee. 2. UNCAPPED Quarterly Plan Profit sharing label contributions & bonuses 3. Paid by Employer 401k contribution, without employee contributions required. $10,000 base or matches employees contributions. 4. Full coverage Paid Health/Dental/Vision/Mental/Wellbeing/Parental/Childcare/DayCare/Pet/Home/Vehicle/Leave/Emergency/Legal insurance. * “No limit everything insurance” all fully covered not out of pocket expenses required by employee EVER. 5. Full coverage Paid Prescription Drug Coverage 6. Full coverage Paid Life Insurance & Accidental Death & Dismemberment Insurance 7. Full coverage Paid Disability Benefits 8. Paid for unlimited riders request at no cost, vip entertainment tickets/drinks/meals & backstage access. 9. Paid Incentive pay to care about others if you need more money. 10. Unlimited PTO, employ request off and you get it, PAID. 11. 24 paid vacation days * Employee choice of rollover, cash out or additional 401k contributions if not used 12. Paid for all bank & federal holidays * If Holiday falls on a Sunday, label gives Monday after off, if it falls on Saturday we get Friday before off PAID. 13. Any continuing education or educational expenses, company paid/reimbursement 14. All meals, company paid/reimbursement 15. All lodging, company paid/reimbursement 16. Clothes/Uniforms/Equipment, company paid/reimbursement 17. Any cost for creatives, above the line, below the line equipment/tools, education paid in full 18. All transportation/commuting company paid/reimbursement: * ABA Roundtrip commute of anywhere to anywhere to home, any type of transit. 19. Bucket list sabbatical, at any length of time, full coverage reimbursement at no cost to employee. 20. Best of all create your own work policy & terms. 

Day 1 A news report breaks in [REDACTED] New York about a man waking up the previous morning, and attempting to turn on his TV to watch the latest episode of his favourite show, only for his remote to crumble in his hand. Confused as to what was going on, the man would attempt to manually turn on his TV, only to accidentally pull a chunk of it off. It was at this moment, that the man would discover that his TV had been replaced with a hyper-realistic cake. The man would question his wife about where the TV went, and why there was a hyper-realistic cake in its place. However, his wife was just as confused as he was about the entire situation at hand. The man would attempt to report this to his local authorities, claiming his TV had been stolen and replaced with a hyper-realistic cake. Only to be laughed off as a prankster due to his ridiculous claim. Angry at this, he would take his story to the local news station hoping for justice to be served to whoever stole his TV. Once again, his claims were laughed off and published as a mere joke. The man would claim that there would be more cases of people’s items being replaced with hyper-realistic cakes going forward and that they would all regret ignoring his case.
Day 29 Police reports coming from all over [REDACTED] New York would reveal the man’s words to be correct. Starting after a young woman would attempt to open her purse, only for the zip to completely come off upon being pulled and quickly break apart, taking some of the modelling chocolate with it. Soon people would begin reporting all over the area that their items had been completely replaced with cake. Phones, laptops, bags, earrings, necklaces, rings and even stacks of cash were discovered to have been replaced with hyper-realistic cakes. Local authorities, having now clearly learned that this was no prank, are looking into the cases to try and track down these valuable items. However, one thing these cases all have in common (aside from the cakes being delicious) is the complete lack of evidence pointing to any suspects. No DNA evidence, no signs of forced entry, and no people in the area at the time. Nobody is even sure when these items were replaced with cakes. They all say they could've sworn they were real a second ago, only to suddenly be cake. Almost as if there was no thief and they had just suddenly turned into cake. Authorities are still on the hunt for a possible suspect in this case, even though the wider New York authorities laugh at them for humouring these absurd claims.
Day 47 The situation has escalated much further than anyone could've possibly anticipated. Now the reports of items being replaced with hyper-realistic cake have rapidly expanded to the rest of New York. Hundreds of people are reporting that their valuable items are being discovered to be hyper-realistic cakes. A man would take his phone out of his pocket to check if he'd received any important emails, only for his phone to crumble into pieces of cake in his hand. A woman would attempt to cash in a check of $100,000 to a bank, only for the modelling chocolate on the check to smash into several pieces when placed down on the counter. A couple would attempt to hurry their kids into the car, worrying they may be late for school. Only for the car to fall apart right in front of them, as the door is pulled off and falls to the ground. People are getting scared, they're worrying that at any moment, any of their prized possessions could end up being a hyper-realistic cake. Nobody is sure what is real and what is cake anymore, so they've taken to trying to cut anything they own, hoping to weed out the cake from the non-cake. Many have ended up accidentally destroying many of the things they own in the process of doing this. But those who still have their stuff have taken to putting stickers on them to ensure they know they're real. That was until an edible sticker was found to be on the back of a hyper-realistic cake emulating a mobile phone. Now, people’s only option is to place all their valued possessions into safes, covered in locks with an 87-number code that not even they know. The governor of New York has commented on the situation claiming that he's doing all he can to try and solve the hyper-realistic cake mystery, but he can only do so much to calm the fear and paranoia that has overcome New York.
Day 93 The situation has dramatically escalated even further somehow, as the hyper-realistic cake plague has now begun heavily affecting the nearby states of Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Vermont, Massachusetts, Connecticut and even some parts of Canada. Reports are coming in from all over the USA and even some of Mexico and South America of people’s items suddenly being replaced with ominous (albeit, tasty) hyper-realistic cakes. The president is doing nothing to quell the fear of US citizens, claiming the whole situation is ridiculous and that everyone is a fool for buying into it. People are starting to riot in the streets believing the president is not doing enough to try and prevent the appearance of hyper-realistic cakes. Many other countries are beginning to consider closing off all travel to the USA out of fear, and some like Germany even going through with it. The safes people were using to hold their valuable items are no longer safe. Many have been discovered to have been replaced with hyper-realistic cakes, leading to even greater fear and paranoia among citizens. And the worst thing of all. The police officer who was in charge of the case in [REDACTED] New York was discovered by his wife the previous night to have been replaced with an identical hyperrealistic cake. There is no evidence of where he may have gone, and there is no evidence pointing to who might've taken him. He has seemingly disappeared without a trace.
Day 149 As fear was reaching its limits, a spark of hope managed to emerge. Tension has been rising as countries all over the world have been receiving reports of people disappearing, and being replaced with hyper-realistic cakes. Even including those that shut off travel to the USA. The president has continued to display pure apathy to the situation, claiming the whole thing to be a farce, until he discovered one morning his wife had been turned into a hyper-realistic cake. Outraged at this, he demanded the perpetrator be immediately found and caught. He banned the selling of any ingredients that could be used to make a hyper-realistic cake, including flour, sugar, eggs, butter, baking powder, chocolate, honey, macaroni and cheese (he does not know how to make a cake, and decided it was better safe than sorry). But even then, hyper-realistic cakes continued to appear. Now even houses and everything in them were getting replaced with giant hyper-realistic cakes, twice the size of an average human being. The president was getting desperate now and was willing to do anything to catch the man responsible for this. So he had cameras set up on every street in every city in every state across the entire USA. And he had every cop working 24/7 on the sight of each camera making sure nothing was replaced with a hyper-realistic cake, and if they were to see hyper-realistic cake-related activities, they were to press a button, sounding the alarm. Yesterday, after weeks and weeks of nothing. An extremely tired officer managed to catch a woman attempting to replace a baby with a hyper-realistic cake. The woman, upon being caught, would quickly admit she was behind the hyper-realistic cake shenanigans. She was immediately brought to Washington DC where the president would proceed to scream and cry at her for hours before demanding she be placed in a holding cell so she could be questioned the following day. This was quickly announced by White House officials and the world began celebrating, praising the president as a hero who was able to end the hyper-realistic cake plague. The joyful people of the world are currently awaiting a word from the US president on who this mysterious woman is, what her motives are and where she’s keeping all these missing people.
Day 180 To the horror of everyone around the globe, the following morning, all hope was lost and all dreams were dashed. The woman taken captive last night was found to have been replaced with a hyper-realistic cake, just as everyone was. The president demanded a search for any evidence indicating how she could've escaped, but they were unable to find anything. Even the cameras meant to keep track of the woman had mysteriously failed to capture anything the previous night. This was the breaking point for the president, and as a result of this, he'd soon become wrapped up in an extremely insane conspiracy. He'd soon begin to believe the cake was a being that was more powerful than any of them, and that it needed to be eradicated at all costs. The presidents would proceed to declare Marshall law and cut off all transport to other countries. People, seeing exactly what was going to happen, attempted to escape the country by piloting the planes and boats themselves. Only to discover the planes and boats were all hyper-realistic cakes, that were unable to fly and would easily sink in water. The president would also declare that all cake is to be thoroughly burned, and anyone believed to be a cake is to be executed on sight, preferably by being cut with a blade. The president would have all secret service agents executed, claiming that they were conspiring with the cake and aided the woman in escaping custody. But even if this wasn't enough for the president, soon he’d begin believing that other countries were made of cake too and declared that any countries believed to be “cake countries” would be bombed off the map. Starting with Mexico, he sent wave after wave of bombs to the country until he was sure anyone inside was dead. He'd soon turn his attention to Germany, believing that it was also a “cake country” due to them previously closing off transportation from the USA there. Soon, Germany was no more, and the president would celebrate that he had destroyed another “cake country”. It seemed like to the president, that every country except the USA was a cake country, and no amount of bombing he did would change that. Everyone knew the sheer amount of bombs he was using was going to destroy the planet, but he didn't care. But just as quickly as this began, it ended. Yesterday, a large angry mob stormed the White House. The president would attempt to bomb the mob, only to discover the bomb launchpad had been replaced with cake. The mob quickly overpowered anyone left supporting the president with sheer numbers, and they swiftly beat the president to death in a manner too disturbing to even attempt to describe. Blood was everywhere, but they didn't care anymore, the dictator was dead.
Day 294 Shortly after the president's death, the USA descended into chaos. People were still being replaced with cake, and nobody had any way to contact people outside the USA, as every single phone was seemingly now a hyper-realistic cake. Many don't even believe there's anyone left out there, and that they were all killed by the president. People quickly began to believe the president was right, and that all the other countries were now just cake. But they took it one step further, they now began to ponder if the entire globe itself was just one giant cake. People began getting so scared of others being cake, that they would attempt to cut anyone they meet just to see if they were cake. There is no food left now besides hyper-realistic cakes, and many are so scared of them that they refuse to even go near them, let alone attempt to eat them. Many are dying from starvation, and those willing to eat the cakes are usually branded as “cake people” and killed on sight. There's still no sign of the people who went missing and were replaced with hyper-realistic cakes. Many believe they just vanished from reality itself or that they were taken by the cake. Some people have begun to worship the cake as a god and make sacrifices to it believing it'll bring their loved ones back. Reality is crumbling, society has fallen apart and it won’t be long until humanity is gone.
Day 334 Not even a year following the first-ever incident, the last human being on earth has died today. Alone, cold and afraid. There is nothing left. No trees, no grass, no water, no animals, no humans, nothing. The only thing that remains now is the hyper-realistic cakes. And that, is the story, of how I destroyed humanity with FUCKING CAKES! I guess in the end you could say… it was real.

About 12 hours ago, roughly around 5 PM last night till 8 AM this morning, I went through a manic state, only realizing it now.
Yesterday around 2 PM, I downed a hefty 500 ML cup of coffee. Don't know if that set it off, but I knew nothing about the impending doom. By 7 PM, an intense urge hit me – I needed to blast some loud, hardcore music through my speakers, singing along, bouncing off the walls, and pacing back and forth in my living room. I even flicked on random YouTube videos on my iPad without really watching them . I also turned on tv to watch Korean movies, nothing special intentions, just to spice things up. Around 9 PM, after a two-hour movie, I figured it was time to hit the sack, not to sleep, just to switch positions, still clueless about my manic state.
I flopped onto my bed, scrolling aimlessly through my phone, hopping between apps without any reason. Even my YouTube queue got abandoned after a minute or two due to my lack of patience. And I wasn't just consuming content; I was spreading myself across multiple chat groups, feeling a sense of relief after firing off about a thousand messages.
Getting responses from others made me feel like a social butterfly, a far cry from the 200% introvert I thought I was. Meanwhile, my heart was hard bumping, making me fidget and shift positions to find some semblance of comfort.
By 1 AM, I was done with the digital frenzy, attempting to toss my gadgets aside and catch some shut-eye, but sleep was impossible for me. I lay there, feeling my heart pound with each passing second, the music from earlier still echoing in my mind. Picture this: a dimly lit room, a little girl singing off key in the dead of night –so eerie
It wasn't until 3 AM that I finally clocked the seven-hour mania marathon I'd been on. I tried the usual tricks to calm myself down – deep breaths, other far-spread-no help treatment, you name it – but fatigue was nowhere in sight.
Eventually, that uncontrollable energy drained away, and around 5 AM, I drifted off for a measly three hours before waking up to wrote down this madness.

Excuse if this is a little messy. I hardly use reddit, and this entire situation is stressing me out to the point of shakiness and illness. On that not, onto the story.
So, for a bit of context, I am a very, very new adult. I just graduated high school, and I've never had the best relationship with my family besides my mom and brother. I was still very distant from my mom because of some slight neglect in the past. I don't blame her for it because she's a single mom and was working a very hard job.
Extra context, my mom had also been planning a California trip. She had changed the plans every other day. Me and my fiance couldn't keep up with it, especially because he had a work venture there.
The past few months, I had been going out with my boyfriend, now fiance ( we'll call Ax ). My mom had been pretty hard on me because of this. Saying how, "I'm not home enough," and, "I need to help with (this this and this)." So, I was already getting a little fed up. I just wanted an escape from the house which is honestly not a very healthy living space due to my fairly slobbish family. Everytime I would go home she would bombard me with stuff, which I never had to do before, so it made me want out more.
I'm just going to summarize the build up by saying, there were quite a few arguments and she never seemed to listen to me. I also have a super hard time communicating my feelings and confrontation so participating in an argument is a big deal.
Now we get to the big night. The last thing we "talked" about was the California trip and how Ax's parents won't let him go if we stay at her friend's house. She got upset and stormed off. Me and Ax were upset so we went to his birth mom's ( we'll call her Cat ) house to take a break. It didn't really help. I had gotten fed up with all of the arguing and bitterness from my mom. All of the snide comments to Ax. I texted her that I was moving out and wasn't going on the California trip. ( I was moving into Cat's house. )
Now should I have texted her? Probably not, but texting helps me form my thoughts into words. I express more clearly through text, and shut down on the phone and especially in person.
She calls and I freak out and hand the phone to Ax. Mistake number 2. A bit about Ax, he is very very protective of me, especially with some of the stuff I've told him about my family and my dad. He doesn't want me to go through the same thing again. He's also a big jokester but is autistic so he doesn't really get when not to do some of his joking tones and words. They also come off as very disrespectful sometimes and he was kind of tired of her. So my mom is angry.
She tells me to come home within 5 minutes. I very shaky get in the car and we head there. We get there and she takes the keys to the car and my phone. Tells me to come inside and talk alone. Now, I get where she's coming from, but I HATE feeling cornered. I need someone else there by my side or I just shut down. It socks and makes things a lot harder with this kind of stuff. Now the rest is a but of a blur but she gets aggressive. No physical violence, but she does get in my face. I back up and she starts acussing me of telling people I'm violent though I haven't. It blurs again and suddenly I'm packing my things and leaving. My brother (15) by my side sad to see me leave this way.
The night goes by and I hear nothing from her. The next day she texts. I don't remember many of the texts, but I do remember being stressed out and not replying to things often. I tell her I need some time.
Few days go by with few texts I answer and a couple calls I don't. Then we get to church just a few days after the big night and an argument over text starts. She acusses Ax of lying, stealing, and vandalizing her car. The "lying" was a joke he made about his origins that I took seriously at first, I am a very slow person, that he had not realized I took seriously until very very later on. On the stealing, he had not stolen from some of the places acussed, but we did have a separate incident that was true. However, he's done his best to make it up and has not done anything like it since. He got punished by me and his parents. She still thinks he should've gotten worse. He's especially tried to make it up to my mom because he had lost her full trust and she was very obvious about it and still hasn't forgiven him to this day. The vandalizing was him working on the car, but not fixing it fully, because, we'll, she took the car before he could.
I talked about getting my legal documents, the entire point I was texting her in the first place, she brought up Ax herself. I misunderstood her and thought she was wanting to keep them from me so threatened legal action. I won't go deep into this because I'm not a lawyer, but ultimately it was more a threat to get my stuff. She said that I could get my stuff from the garage. Remember when I told you that my family was slobish? Yeah, I have no clue where these documents are and the garage is stacked to the sealing so it's going to take me a bit. I don't want to, but it's the only way to get my documents.
I completely give up at this point. I already said I needed a bit of time, but she continued to text. When I didn't answer email me a mental health line. The only times I would talk to her was to get my stuff. She started making facebook posts warning about toxic relationships, and how losing loved ones without making peace is terrible. This continues for a bit then stopped a couple days ago. The last thing I got, just a few hours ago, was an email. I will be quoting it word for word but changing names blah blah, you know how privacy works.
"Hi, [deadname]! I hope everything is going well for you.
I just wanted to take some time to explain some things. I wanted to tell you these things in person because it really does matter. Reading something is far different from hearing how someone says it. Arguments and misunderstandings should always be fixed in person.
First and foremost, I love you. I would do anything within my power for you. I have always been there for you and I want to continue being there. It breaks my heart that you don't want anything to do with me. I've tried to make you feel loved and supported. I've been active in your interests and activities. I even played Minecraft for you... (Haha)
I wanted to talk to you privately because we will never be able to fix things between us if someone else is involved. And honestly, it's no one else's business. I've never physically or intentionally hurt you so there is no reason to be scared to spend time with me.
What I have tried to tell you through text, is that I did not blow up because you wanted to move out. My response was that we would talk when you got home. That was not blowing up and this is why it is important to communicate in person rather than via text. I wanted to know your plans and see if I could help or add some suggestions that might help. I blew up because of the disrespect. I was being treated like I was nothing and like I've done nothing for you. I tried to explain that I wasn't mad about you wanting to move out. I'm not sure why you thought I would be since we've been talking about it for 6 months.
I apologize to you for how I handled my thoughts and feelings about [Ax]. It shouldn't have been handled that way. I'm not mad that either of you made mistakes. I was mad at the lack of taking ownership of said mistakes. I was mad that I was lied to again when I called out those mistakes.
I just want us to work through this. I love you. I will always love you. I want to help you if and when I can. I always want to be a part of your life. I am hurt that you can so easily throw away our relationship because of one argument. I am hurt that you're acting like I've done something for you to be afraid of me.
My door is always open and I'm always just a phone call away.
Love, Mom"
It makes me feel like I'm in the wrong and I'm actually unsure if I'm being to harsh on her. AITH?
TLDR; I move in with my fiancé. Arguments with mom as she acusses us of things we didn't do besides one thing. Im tired and stressed so go almost no contact. I get an email from her making me rethink my position on the matter.
Edit 1 and 2: Updates to layout of the post.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUOUAr-WvFk
1:37 - Traits of a Narcissist
A narcissist has an insatiable need for admiration, affirmation, and validation, all of which are their drug of narcissistic supply. They believe themselves to be superior and grandiose, they're arrogant, they lack empathy, they're exploitative, they have unreasonable demands of people. These are all traits that are opposite from the traits of Jesus Christ and yet a religious context is often the most optimal place for a narcissist to freely practice their narcissism while appearing virtuous or pious. So I'm going to share with you 10 insights into why narcissists love religion and how they use it to serve their own purposes.
2:22 - Why It's Important to Understand Why Narcissists Love Religion
It's important to understand these things because Jesus warns his followers to beware of false prophets which come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. Hopefully these 10 insights will help you hack into whether or not you're dealing with a true follower or true shepherd or minister of Christ or a narcissist who is posing as one of these roles instead of being there to serve.
2:51 - #1 - The Abundance of Narcissistic Supply to be Had
The first reason why narcissists love religion is because of the abundance of narcissistic supply that could be had. It's a reality there is so much narcissistic supply to be had in religious settings. And narcissistic supply, as I mentioned before, is the praise, admiration, validation, honor, sense of significance that a narcissist is addicted to in order to regulate their negative emotions. So a religious context provides an easy platform for a narcissist because they could get access to a stage or a pulpit or a mic or some means to exert influence where they can gain all of that admiration and praise or a sense of superiority where they can present themselves as godly or pious individuals or chosen by God or specially anointed, all of this to gain validation and attention from people. And like I mentioned all of these things are a drug that a narcissist is addicted to and it is what actually feeds them, more than actually being in a relationship with God but to the pure all things are pure so there are many people in church and religious contexts who are honest good-hearted who believe the best about others and so they can be gullible to the narcissists around them who have disguised themselves as pious people for the sake of getting narcissistic supply and this is truly an evil because a narcissist pursuit of narcissistic supply comes at the cost of destroying and stepping on other people without any regard for their welfare.
4:32 - #2 - The Allure of Control and Power
The second reason why narcissists love religion is because of the alert of control and power. Religion offers a structure of beliefs and practices that can be manipulated by narcissists to exert control over others. For example a narcissist may twist and distort doctrines and scriptures to justify their authority and demand obedience from followers they could create God in their own image, which a lot of them do rather than follow and conform themselves to the God of the Bible. This kind of control feeds into the narcissist need for domination and power and it can get to a dangerous point where religious narcissist replaces God with themselves where they subtly over time position themselves as intermediaries between individuals and God. A narcissist might manipulate followers into believing that they alone possess the ability to interpret God's will or to speak on his behalf a narcissist does this whether consciously or unconsciously to elevate themselves to a divine status in the eyes of their followers and they may never say that they are doing this outright because no person would ever accept a human saying that you have to worship them like a god but a narcissist will certainly have structures and systems in place to make this a reality. And a follower or member of that religious context might not even realize what is happening until one day they notice that this narcissist has taken on an increasingly central role in their life and is dictating their decisions and their behaviors as if they were the ultimate authority. If you notice that you might be in a spiritual environment like this or someone you love might be and you're wondering if there's spiritual abuse going on or if it's a cult I put together a checklist to help you assess that situation and you can get access to it by clicking on the link in the description box below it's a really good tool to help you identify if the religious context you're in is toxic or has turned into a cult.
6:47 - #3 - Camouflage for Manipulation
The third reason why narcissists love religion is because it serves as a camouflage for manipulation. Religious contexts serve as a perfect camouflage for narcissist to disguise their true intentions these are places where it's easy for narcissists to cloak their behaviors and demands in spiritual language where they can manipulate and exploit others while appearing righteous and virtuous at the same time. And what better setup could there be for a covert narcissist who can continue acting narcissistic while appearing like a saint in the process there's no other place except churches and ministries and religious environments.
7:29 - #4 - Their ability to exploit certain teachings for personal gain
The fourth reason why narcissists are drawn to religion is because of their ability to exploit certain teachings for personal gain. Many religious communities emphasize principles like forgiveness, redemption, giving a second chance, reconciling, turning the other cheek, submitting to authority, and narcissists exploit these teachings extensively. They may present themselves as repentant as enlightened or they could be demanding forgiveness and reconciliation from others while refusing to cultivate Christ-like virtues within themselves so all this manipulation allows them to continue exploiting others behind this facade of being Godly.
8:15 - #5 - It allows them to Idolize their Self-Image
The fifth reason why narcissists love religion is because it allows them to idolize their self-image. Narcissists often have an inflated sense of self-importance and believe that they are special or unique so religion can offer a platform to reinforce this idealized self-image where they can portray themselves as chosen by God or having special spiritual gifts or insights or anointing.
8:44 - #6 - The Lack of Accountability
The sixth reason why narcissists love religion is because of the lack of accountability. Some denominations or churches or contacts might have more accountability than others but narcissist tend to gravitate towards those religious contexts that don't have much or have very little. Many religious narcissists exploit religious settings because they perceive them to be environments where their behaviors are less likely to be questioned or challenged so this lack of accountability allows them to continue their manipulative tactics without being questioned or challenged.
9:23 - #7 - It Gives Them a Get-Out-of-Jail Free Card from Having to Self-Reflect
The seventh reason why narcissists love religion is because it gives them a get out of jail free card from having to self-reflect. Narcissists typically struggle with self-awareness and introspection so religion offers a way for them to avoid confronting their own wounds or trauma or shortcomings by focusing on outward religious performance or acquiring religious knowledge, all this outward stuff that they can focus on. It's like Jesus saying to the Pharisees they're like these whitewashed tombs; they look beautiful and nice on the outside but inside they're full of dead man's bones. The attraction to religion allows a narcissist to spiritually bypass themselves where they can use all kinds of spiritual language like it's all washed by the blood or things like that to avoid dealing with deeper unresolved trauma within themselves and getting healed from it because there is power in Christ for healing but you have to do the work.
10:26 - #8 - Entitled and Exploit People in those Contexts
The eighth reason why narcissists love religion is is because it's easy for them to be entitled and to exploit people in these contexts in religious settings. Narcissists may feel entitled to special treatment or privileges due to their perceived spiritual status they might exploit others trust and vulnerability for their own personal gain and control. Narcissists may expect people to serve them, like a slave, free of charge. For instance, because they believe that they have a God-like status or they might expect people to hand their wealth over to them or neglect their own families in order to put the narcissist first all in the name of God.
11:09 - #9 - They Can Create a God in Their Own Image
The ninth reason why narcissists love religion is because they can create a God in their own image. Narcissists are not interested in cultivating Godly virtues within themselves as I mentioned before they would rather project their own traits onto God viewing him as judgmental, angry, or traits that resonate more with their narcissistic personality, more than who God actually is. And this kind of behavior allows narcissists to maintain a sense of superiority and justification for their actions.
11:43 - #10 - The Facade of Moral Superiority
The 10th reason why narcissist love religion is the facade of moral superiority religion provides narcissists with this platform to project a false sense of being moral or virtuous or Godly. And they can create this facade by practicing all the religious rituals and portray themselves in a certain way in front of people like this upstanding citizen, but in reality they could be practicing all kinds of dark deeds in private without people knowing hiding their true intentions all with this mask of piety and so that can serve very well for many narcissists and to enable them to continue their dark practices in secret while people are believing that they are this Godly pious person and that is actually a very hypocritical way to live and Jesus actually condemned these kinds of practices because that is what the religious leaders were doing in Biblical times but many narcissists gravitate towards religious settings in order to be able to continue living out this hypocritical lifestyle.
So understanding why narcissists are drawn to religion is really important in order to recognize and address the manipulation that can happen in churches and ministries while many churches and ministries promote cultivating Christ-like qualities. Sadly those same places attract narcissist to them because of opportunities it presents for control and admiration and validation but hopefully by being aware of these dynamics we can hopefully discern between genuine spiritual leaders and those who are using religion to drive their own ego-driven motives. Remember Jesus warned against the false prophets so hopefully by applying these insights we can navigate relationships in churches and ministries and operate with God's wisdom and discernment where we can be as shrewd as a snake and as innocent as a dove.

In response to Apple Music's Top 100 album list (which I thought was horrid but hey who am I), I decided to make my own top 100 album list to make corrections where I thought it was needed. I'm sure all of us music enthusiasts have attempted this before, but I really went at it this time. I scoured the internet for musical opinions, used AI, and of course a little bit of personal opinion, although I tried to be as unbiased as humanly possible. I tried my best to take into account critical acclaim, popularity, artistic value, cohesiveness & flow, influence, and just overall value. Here it is, let me know what you'd change or think about my list or Apple's list!
(Also, I made sure only to do one album per musical act, as there's so much great music out there it felt wrong to double up on the same artist)
~The Greatest Albums of All Time~
1. Abbey Road by The Beatles
2. Pet Sounds by The Beach Boys
3. A Love Supreme by John Coltrane
4. The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars by David Bowie
5. OK Computer by Radiohead
6. To Pimp A Butterfly by Kendrick Lamar
7. Rumours by Fleetwood Mac
8. Blue by Joni Mitchell
9. Kind of Blue by Miles Davis
10. The Velvet Underground & Nico by The Velvet Underground & Nico
11. My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy by Kanye West
12. Songs in the Key of Life by Stevie Wonder
13. In the Court of the Crimson King by King Crimson
14. Loveless by My Bloody Valentine
15. Illmatic by Nas
16. Nevermind by Nirvana
17. Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd
18. Disintegration by The Cure
19. Hounds of Love by Kate Bush
20. What’s Going On by Marvin Gaye
21. Led Zeppelin IV by Led Zeppelin
22. Madvillainy by Madvillain
23. Heaven or Las Vegas by Cocteau Twins
24. Vespertine by Bjork
25. The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill by Lauryn Hill
26. Journey in Satchidananda by Alice Coltrane ft. Pharoah Sanders
27. Remain in Light by Talking Heads
28. Electric Ladyland by The Jimi Hendrix Experience
29. Grace by Jeff Buckley
30. The Queen is Dead by The Smiths
31. Highway 61 Revisited by Bob Dylan
32. Unknown Pleasures by Joy Division
33. Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers) by Wu-Tang Clan
34. The Black Saint and the Sinner Lady by Mingus
35. Paranoid by Black Sabbath
36. The Downward Spiral by Nine Inch Nails
37. Doolittle by Pixies
38. The Low End Theory by A Tribe Called Quest
39. Is This It by The Strokes
40. Pink Moon by Nick Drake
41. Ágætis byrjun by Sigur Rós
42. Aquemini by Outkast
43. Mezzanine by Massive Attack
44. Discovery by Daft Punk
45. Songs of Leonard Cohen by Leonard Cohen
46. In the Aeroplane Over the Sea by Neutral Milk Hotel
47. Daydream Nation by Sonic Youth
48. Illinois by Sufjan Stevens
49. Ride the Lightning by Metallica
50. The Velvet Rope by Janet Jackson
51. The Doors by The Doors
52. Blonde by Frank Ocean
53. Sometimes I Might Be Introvert by Little Simz
54. The Glow Pt 2 by The Microphones
55. Pastel Blues by Nina Simone
56. Donuts by J Dilla
57. Marquee Moon by Television
58. Either / Or by Elliott Smith
59. Future Days by Can
60. Since I Left You by The Avalanches
61. Horses by Patti Smith
62. Souvlaki by Slowdive
63. MM..FOOD by MF DOOM
64. Love Deluxe by Sade
65. When the Pawn… by Fiona Apple
66. Lift Yr. Skinny Fists Like Antennas to Heaven! by Godspeed You Black Emperor!
67. Bloom by Beach House
68. Liquid Swords by Genius/GZA
69. Piñata by Freddie Gibbs & Madlib
70. Close to the Edge by Yes
71. Laughing Stock by Talk Talk
72. Endtroducing….. by DJ Shadow
73. Selected Ambient Works 85-92 by Aphex Twin
74. Soundtracks for the Blind by Swans
75. Titanic Rising by Weyes Blood
76. Mama’s Gun by Erykah Badu
77. Spiderland by Slint
78. The Lonesome Crowded West by Modest Mouse
79. Juju by Siouxsie and The Banshees
80. The Money Store by Death Grips
81. Dots and Loops by Stereolab
82. Floating Into the Night by Julee Cruise
83. LONG SEASON by Fishmans
84. Velocity : Design : Comfort by Sweet Trip
85. Atrocity Exhibition by Danny Brown
86. Deathconsciousness by Have A Nice Life
87. Karma by Pharoah Sanders
88. Symbolic by Death
89. Dreamboat Annie by Heart
90. Igor by Tyler, the Creator
91. Hot Rats by Frank Zappa
92. First Utterance by Comus
93. Ants from Up There by Black Country, New Road
94. Kalk samen kuri no hana by Sheena Ringo
95. Dragon New Warm Mountain I Believe In You by Big Thief
96. A I A: Alien Observer by Grouper
97. De todas las flores by Natalia Lafourcade
98. Adan no kaze by Ichiko Aoba
99. 3D Country by Geese
100. Daughter of Darkness by Natural Snow Buildings

TLDR: Add some rare traits that can negate some of the negative mood de-buffs that might apply to pawns from their ideology i.e. a Noble Melee/Despised Ranged colony having a pawn with a trait that allows him to wield ranged weapons without the typical "Wielding a Despised Weapon" mood de-buff.
One of the greatest additions to Rimworld has to be the Ideology DLC as it brings prime roleplay potential to our story generator. The ability to pick and choose exactly how your colony is going to play out to allow specialized stories based on whatever you feel most motivated to play right now is beyond amazing, yet I believe the integration to the base game can be significantly improved.
The first major thing that I can think of is to improve on the noble/despised weapon selections as you might remove half of the game's combat from early to mid-game as the mood de-buff is difficult to combat when you're low on drugs early on, or it just might not be worth having to micromanage your rocket launcher pawn when you notice a particularly large mech raid approaching full of lancers that'll destroy your early-mid game melee pawns that have weak armor, few or no shield belts, and no jump packs.
The easiest way to combat this issue would be to have some traits negative about specific parts of an ideology, such as Honorable Fighter, a pawn that wouldn't face a mood de-buff from utilizing melee weapons that would otherwise be despised. This can be extended to many parts of ideology such as removing the required apparel for some roles via a trait or even cosmetic things such as an animal Recon Helmet prefeforced style via a trait even when you don't have the style as a part of your ideology. My primary thoughts on this idea have mainly been focused on the combat aspect, as I simply love the story of some rare pawn you manage to cut the leg off of that has the mystical trait that allows him to use ranged weapons in your Noble melee colony and you get to recruit/convert him.
My playstyle plays a lot into this idea as well as I love "main character" combat pawns that get all the juicy bionics and can act as a solo raiding party late midgame. I also thought a bit about SrGrafo's Tales from the Rim comic series and the Sniper (I forgot his name...) in the peaceful rice-farming colony (the Fireflies?).
Overall, I believe that a small addition that could create interest in "main character" based stories on the Rim would be having very rare (or expensive in character creator) traits that allow the pawn to bypass some of the mood de-buffs that come with specific ideologies. Let me know your thoughts or if there are any additions!
(P.S. If anyone can recommend me a good combination for a Dune ideology (with Vanilla Ideology Expanded) I'd appreciate it! So far I'm thinking Islamic Origin, Blood Court, Raiders, Human Primacy, Elders)

TW: Sui/cidal thoughts, self ha/rm.
Life is a blessing. I am aware of that, painfully aware of it, even. But it so often does not feel like one. It so often just hurts, aches, burns everywhere. How do my emotions hurt more than my hands do after I hurl them at walls? How can being human be so painful, so relentless, so terrifying? I have lost everything. I have lost my whole life. I have lost my friends, my ambitions, my will to live. But I can't kill myself. My fear of eternal damnation is too deep. Even if I dream of it every waking moment, I know I'll have to live. I'll have to suffer till my time comes, forced to have salvation at my fingertips and watch it slide away. I wonder how every sharp stick would feel stuck through my heart. I wonder if my feelings would still hurt more if I was hit by a truck. I wonder if what I am living is already eternal damnation from a past life.
All my pain seems to not matter if it doesn't make me kill myself. But I still mourn what has died inside of me, and I mourn by myself with not one person to cry to. And yet, it is my fault.
I just wish I could feel human. I just wish killing myself was an option.

How do I get over my fear of dating humans? I feel like I have been avoiding dating people because of how random and strange real people can be.
I feel like I've cycling through different sexualities (objectum/Ecosexual) because I am scared of other humans and dating them.
I feel like I am scared of getting my heart broken again because of how feminine I look. How do I, as a pre-T trans man, work on being more masculine?

To tell it quickly: trying to kill children is no-no; and yet the whole point of the game is to make you love its characters, who all more or less want to kill the protagonist at some point.
I see two valid possibilities to explain why this may not be a problem:
1) The "meta" hypothesis: The whole game takes death kinda lightly, because the premise is that the player themselve may take killing monsters lightly. This way, it would be in the tone of the game for death not to be something as bad as it should be, and even "good" characters would see only a moderate problem in trying to kill a child. I do not say death is without consequence (as the whole point of the game is to prove there is), just that both the playeFrisk and the monsters have a bias towards death being somewhat acceptable.
2) The "in-universe" hypothesis: Most monsters would be... quite disfunctionnal adults; they're all cartoonishly goofy, in a way that makes Frisk, a litteral toddler, seem more mature than them in comparison. Therefore, maybe they all try to kill Frisk because they're a little to naive or dumb-dumb to realize the consequence of their action.
A third, "serious" possibility does not seem really plausible to me: the game is too lighthearted and all characters go from "I'll kill you" to "We're besties now" just too quickly and inconsequentially; it does not look like they're thinking this through, like "We've been trapped for centuries and absolutely loathe humans, which children it is legitimate to murder if it allows us to free ourselves, but this child proved by their actions that they're worthy of reconsidering our position, and now we respect them"... it's more like "Ngahhh I'm being an anime superhero and going to defeat the baddie but oh! they make nice spaghetti, yummy!". Therefore, I don't think that the "they do it out of necessity" is the most relevant one.
Let's just review the main characters:
Toriel: wants to help the child; is a bit irresponsible concerning the kingdom and Asgore.
Sans: Only attacks the player once they have gone too far. Says that, without Toriel, he would have killed Frisk... but is he just trying to sound badass or what would be his motivation? If he is this ready to kill a child, why wait for everybody to be murdered to react?
Papyrus: Does not really seem to understand what death even is.
Undyne: I likely to hot blooded to think her actions through.
Alphys: Never attacks the player.
Mettaton: Likely blinded by his ego.
Asgore: Seems "not bright enough" to think of a better solution.
Conclusion: I think Toby just didn't bother thinking too far, for a game that is firstly lighthearted and quirky; the consistency (or lack thereof) of the characters does not seem to be intended to resist fridge logic. There are scenes that are obviously there just for the sake of their effect and not in order to build a deep and consistent tone.