Cleansing adderall
Cushing’s possible with normal cortisol test?
2024.05.02 16:59 Specific-Rest1631 Cushing’s possible with normal cortisol test?
38 y/o male, unofficially diagnosed with either hypermobile Ehlers Danlos or just generalized hypermobility without much skin extensibility, after searching for years for a reason for severe chronic fatigue and hypersomnia.
TL;DR When I was around 12 or 13 years old I went from a thin and energetic kid to being obese very quickly. Developed purple striae on underarms and armpits, belly and hips, thighs, buttocks. No fatty hump etc. Single morning collection cortisol test in 2021 was 18.7 mcg/dL with an upper reference range of 19.8. How likely was this to be a false negative for a cortisol problem?
More detail, between grade 6 and 7 I became obese and carry a lot of the weight in me belly and thighs although people often notice weight loss in my face. I’ve gone up too 305 lb ( I’m 5ft 11in) down to 180 lb and everywhere in between several times, although my body seems to really like the low 240 range, and my body shape has always been the same with overhanging belly fat forcing me to wear pants very low on my hips. All other symptoms except for a generally sensitive stomach and seasonal allergies also started around that time: “exercise induced asthma” which I now know is actually probably vocal chord dysfunction, chronic fatigue, sleeping 10-12 hours a night plus napping, bouts of severe intestinal pain right before defecating, IBS, bladder problems, bounding pulse and heart palpitations. Chronic headache came on in my 30s and is now daily with throbbing type pain mostly in my eyes, temples, upper gums, and behind my nose that almost never subsides. Presyncope has come on and gradually gotten worse, provoked by standing from laying, reclining, or crouching, although a handful of times it’s come on from strong positive or negative emotions. Generally feel tired and weak, unrestful sleep. Stopping lifting in 2022 after nearly fairing during a set of squats with a couple plates on the bar. The next year my resting heart rate started to gradually increase from 60-80 in the morning to 110-120, even 130, after a full day of working, I ended up taking a 3 month disability leave which helped with that specific problem.
I’ve had the standard blood tests several times, plus from the endocrinologist, and rheumatologist twice. MRI to rule out Chiari and cervical spine issues. Completely cleared by cardiologist including tilt table negative for POTS. Gastro did an upper endoscopy and only noted mild gastritis. Had 2 at home sleep studies, 2 in the lab, and 1 more in the lab to rule out narcolepsy.
At this point I’m at a loss. My muscles are burning and I’m out of breath after walking up a flight of stairs. I can’t mow my own lawn or play with my kid. I walk around like a zombie at work and honestly it’s probably not safe for me to drive in the morning the way my eyes are trying to close and that’s with Adderall, 600mg of caffeine, and some nicotine just to get my morning started, I use in excess of 1000mg caffeine daily for 15+ years now. And yet no single test has ever indicated any problem other than gastritis which 50% of the population has because America. I’ve also tried every imaginable supplement from vitamins, to adaptogens, herbal parasite cleanse, you name it. I harrangued my doctor into referring me to Vanderbilt University’s autonomic dysfunction unit because my uncle was diagnosed at Mayo with Pure Autonomic Failure, and his mom supposed had Shy-Drager (multiple system atrophy) but it’s been months and they haven’t even sent the new patient screening.
Desperate for answers, looking back through my records wondering if there’s something they could have missed.
submitted by Specific-Rest1631 to AskDocs [link] [comments]
TL;DR When I was around 12 or 13 years old I went from a thin and energetic kid to being obese very quickly. Developed purple striae on underarms and armpits, belly and hips, thighs, buttocks. No fatty hump etc. Single morning collection cortisol test in 2021 was 18.7 mcg/dL with an upper reference range of 19.8. How likely was this to be a false negative for a cortisol problem?
More detail, between grade 6 and 7 I became obese and carry a lot of the weight in me belly and thighs although people often notice weight loss in my face. I’ve gone up too 305 lb ( I’m 5ft 11in) down to 180 lb and everywhere in between several times, although my body seems to really like the low 240 range, and my body shape has always been the same with overhanging belly fat forcing me to wear pants very low on my hips. All other symptoms except for a generally sensitive stomach and seasonal allergies also started around that time: “exercise induced asthma” which I now know is actually probably vocal chord dysfunction, chronic fatigue, sleeping 10-12 hours a night plus napping, bouts of severe intestinal pain right before defecating, IBS, bladder problems, bounding pulse and heart palpitations. Chronic headache came on in my 30s and is now daily with throbbing type pain mostly in my eyes, temples, upper gums, and behind my nose that almost never subsides. Presyncope has come on and gradually gotten worse, provoked by standing from laying, reclining, or crouching, although a handful of times it’s come on from strong positive or negative emotions. Generally feel tired and weak, unrestful sleep. Stopping lifting in 2022 after nearly fairing during a set of squats with a couple plates on the bar. The next year my resting heart rate started to gradually increase from 60-80 in the morning to 110-120, even 130, after a full day of working, I ended up taking a 3 month disability leave which helped with that specific problem.
I’ve had the standard blood tests several times, plus from the endocrinologist, and rheumatologist twice. MRI to rule out Chiari and cervical spine issues. Completely cleared by cardiologist including tilt table negative for POTS. Gastro did an upper endoscopy and only noted mild gastritis. Had 2 at home sleep studies, 2 in the lab, and 1 more in the lab to rule out narcolepsy.
At this point I’m at a loss. My muscles are burning and I’m out of breath after walking up a flight of stairs. I can’t mow my own lawn or play with my kid. I walk around like a zombie at work and honestly it’s probably not safe for me to drive in the morning the way my eyes are trying to close and that’s with Adderall, 600mg of caffeine, and some nicotine just to get my morning started, I use in excess of 1000mg caffeine daily for 15+ years now. And yet no single test has ever indicated any problem other than gastritis which 50% of the population has because America. I’ve also tried every imaginable supplement from vitamins, to adaptogens, herbal parasite cleanse, you name it. I harrangued my doctor into referring me to Vanderbilt University’s autonomic dysfunction unit because my uncle was diagnosed at Mayo with Pure Autonomic Failure, and his mom supposed had Shy-Drager (multiple system atrophy) but it’s been months and they haven’t even sent the new patient screening.
Desperate for answers, looking back through my records wondering if there’s something they could have missed.
2024.05.01 16:44 naraburns Quality Contributions Report for April 2024
This is the Quality Contributions Roundup. It showcases interesting and well-written comments and posts from the period covered. If you want to get an idea of what this community is about or how we want you to participate, look no further (except the rules maybe--those might be important too).
As a reminder, you can nominate Quality Contributions by hitting the report button and selecting the "Actually A Quality Contribution!" option. Additionally, links to all of the roundups can be found in the wiki of /theThread which can be found here. For a list of other great community content, see here.
These are mostly chronologically ordered, but I have in some cases tried to cluster comments by topic so if there is something you are looking for (or trying to avoid), this might be helpful.
@MadMonzer:
@Tenaz:
@aqouta:
@FiveHourMarathon:
@MollieTheMare:
@ZRslashRIFLE:
@ahobata:
@WaltBismarck:
@FlyOnTheWall:
@gattsuru:
@Folamh3:
@Amadan:
@FarNearEverywhere:
@RandomRanger:
@doglatine:
@WestphalianPeace:
@FiveHourMarathon:
@urquan:
@FCfromSSC:
@Primaprimaprima:
@ControlsFreak:
@campfireSmoresEaten:
@Here:
@4bpp:
@dovetailing:
submitted by naraburns to thethread [link] [comments]
As a reminder, you can nominate Quality Contributions by hitting the report button and selecting the "Actually A Quality Contribution!" option. Additionally, links to all of the roundups can be found in the wiki of /theThread which can be found here. For a list of other great community content, see here.
These are mostly chronologically ordered, but I have in some cases tried to cluster comments by topic so if there is something you are looking for (or trying to avoid), this might be helpful.
Quality Contributions to the Main Motte
@RenOS:@MadMonzer:
@Tenaz:
@aqouta:
@FiveHourMarathon:
@MollieTheMare:
Special Issue: The Whiteish Question
@KulakRevolt:@ZRslashRIFLE:
@ahobata:
@WaltBismarck:
@FlyOnTheWall:
Contributions for the week of April 1, 2024
@Hoffmeister25:@gattsuru:
@Folamh3:
@Amadan:
@FarNearEverywhere:
@RandomRanger:
@doglatine:
Contributions for the week of April 8, 2024
@Rov_Scam:Contributions for the week of April 15, 2024
@clo:@WestphalianPeace:
- "It's not intended to be demoralization, no one actually sits down and goes bwahaha now I will make the world ugly to demoralize my enemies. It's exaltation."
- "In summary, yes. What's beautiful in art is what's beautiful in nature."
@FiveHourMarathon:
@urquan:
Contributions for the week of April 22, 2024
@RandomRanger:@FCfromSSC:
- "The Sexual Revolution pitch was that we could remove shame from sex completely, that everyone could have all the sex and everything would be fine. That pitch has been gradually walked back as the resulting disasters become increasingly undeniable."
- "The captain's wheel of Democracy does not appear to be linked to the rudder of concrete policy; spin it left, spin it right, take your hands completely off, it doesn't actually matter much."
@Primaprimaprima:
@ControlsFreak:
@campfireSmoresEaten:
@Here:
Contributions for the week of April 29, 2024
@rokmonster:@4bpp:
@dovetailing:
2024.05.01 14:38 RevolutionaryRock620 Chakra cleansing music for 2 and a half hours while on 50 mlgs of adderall. Weird drug experience? Or schizophrenia? Or ghosts?
So this morning I took 50 mlgs of adderall at once. Sometimes done I used to take 25 mlgs. But then never listen to chakra cleansing music. I kept floating around barely awake while listening to the chakra music and I woke up 2.5 hours later. It was total cleansing I don’t think it was different parts at one time.
To get into what I dreamt about I should explain what happened 4-6 hours prior.
At around 12 50 am we had already had four beers and then a shot of moonshine. Convenience store moonshine not bathtub, and then around 1 we had gone outside for a few cigs and on our second one we kept hearing shit in the trees. We also have a dog with us. She usually runs around and has fun even at night. But last night she kept looking where the noises would come from and we did to. Her ears way up and not moving a muscle stayed in the same position until we went I raise. But right before we did I was alerted by a human sounding idk just voice let’s say that. No words just a few moans from the other side of the property. So we went inside.
Now if you know my body and his property there’s lots of ghost stories about a few previous family members not friends but family of the people who owned the house who died in and outside the house along with stories of cryptids such as skinwalkers.
Well anyways until about 1 35 we had been walking around the property freaked the fuck out. My buddy is military trained and because he believes in such things I didn’t want freak him out but I had already started freaking out so I followed him. Anyway time goes by and we didn’t find anything but kept hearing shit or atleast I did all around his garages, yes garages, and apparently he didn’t but I would tell him when I heard a noise. We had both been hunting in our lives, me not anymore, and he was military trained, so our ears were good and ready before we were already outside. I had started only hearing noises, ofc with my schizophrenia that’s common. So we went inside and decided to sit down, watch a movie, and relax.
Also some time had gone by because my buddy started practicing his reflexes because the reason we were outside previously was because his car light wouldn’t turn off for a very long time. And it goes off everyday without a hitch 5-10 seconds after exiting the car.
I had previously been feeling like aliens or just weird because another time and with a different buddy in St. Louis my buddy and I had been up all night. That’s a ghost or alien story which I can explain in detail another time if asked. But it ended with us both in the car for 3-5 hours immediately after experiencing a clock grandfather clock going off and then stopping immediately followed by all the toys in a child’s room simultaneously going off. Stopping. Us asking who’s here and then one single toy going off by itself. Either way in St. Louis , my buddy and I decided to run immediately outside. We sat in the car, with the doors open, 5 minutes. Now granted, it was around 230-3 when we had plates down in the living room, me on the floor, him on the couch when the dog started acting weird and all that had happened in the child’s room. Long story short, some how my buddy and I had been up sitting in that car in silence somehow for 4 hours. We lost four hours when we thought it had been five. We got outside, into the car, chatted, the sun was up, and had decided to go back inside. We check the time at it was 7 am when we had known we went to “sleep” at 230-3 and not long after, the incident happened. He chalked it up to aliens and ever since iver never known what to do let alone anyone believe me. I explain this because before we went searching, I had started getting the same feeling from the night right before the toys went off.
Back to the main story, after my buddy had practiced his bow staff skills and reflexes. My buddy went to his second living room hallway where the basement door lies. This door is always locked and never left unlocked. I have also been living here for 4 months now and also stayed here plenty enough times to know that that door. Is never unlocked. His dad was long asleep and it was just us. Anyway my buddy comes in and tells me he had to re lock the basement door that of which someone had died in a few previous years ago by hanging themselves. Right after their granddaughter had died in the backyard. I told him it was as simple as the thermostat, I’m staying here till I’m on my feet. Nothing more. And I know that is one of the things in the house not to be touched and that it wasn’t me.
With this all explained we deduced to watch a movie and then eventually my buddy and I took some adderall. Idk how much he’s taken but I took 2 25 mlgs xr release pills. I’ve already texted to some extent, my buddy who’s with me now, of what has happened to me and this sort of weak story. And will return with his side of the story if there is something to add.
We had taken the adderall around 2 and decided to go to bed around 3 40. At this point I retrieved to my room after the last 4 or so minutes of a full house episode and had decided to search for something to sleep to. Then is stumbled upon chakra cleansing music. It’s been awhile and every other time has been okay with no real experience. I didn’t expect to sleep such as not many people do on 50 mlgs of this stuff.
I did not lose time or even sleep really. Instead I floated in the realm of half asleep and half awake. Back and forth half asleep, then half awake. Literally. Meanwhile focusing on my waist. Not knowing this is where the sacral chakra is. Anyway all I could dream about was super intense experiences with all kinds of cryptids and all kinds of feelings of simply being afraid and scared. Now I do not know why I kept choosing to stay “asleep” but I had “woken up” about 8 or 9 times and it was only literally 3 hours later from when I had tried to fall asleep. But every time I was awake and asleep, again as much as you can adderall. I could see cryptids as totem poles and feel those feelings. Directly from my forehead to my sacral chakra. I could feel my forehead and waist the whole time but a connection between them both and that connection was like I said. Weird interchanging lines of cryptids and feelings of being scared. It’s what I could and feel. And I woke up with a sacral chakra image on the screen. I don’t think it was individual instances of cleansing chakras because it was one frequency. It was titled Full Night All 7 Chakras Cleansing Music and Rain 7 Chakra Opening & Balance Sleep and Meditation. The link below.
https://youtu.be/MNMfGfySV9g?si=uyCVWa3ZKOP5uJRj
I think I was just tripping but what do you think? Expected ghost and shit but got this. From spooky night to bad decisions to one trippy nap!
Now I do have questions. But knowing this is a chakra known for being creative , I’m not blown away by any of this but would love anyone who knows about chakras and stuff like this to give a deeper analysis of what happened.
Thank you. Prefer to keep everything to the comments and will not reply to dms.
submitted by RevolutionaryRock620 to Chakras [link] [comments]
To get into what I dreamt about I should explain what happened 4-6 hours prior.
At around 12 50 am we had already had four beers and then a shot of moonshine. Convenience store moonshine not bathtub, and then around 1 we had gone outside for a few cigs and on our second one we kept hearing shit in the trees. We also have a dog with us. She usually runs around and has fun even at night. But last night she kept looking where the noises would come from and we did to. Her ears way up and not moving a muscle stayed in the same position until we went I raise. But right before we did I was alerted by a human sounding idk just voice let’s say that. No words just a few moans from the other side of the property. So we went inside.
Now if you know my body and his property there’s lots of ghost stories about a few previous family members not friends but family of the people who owned the house who died in and outside the house along with stories of cryptids such as skinwalkers.
Well anyways until about 1 35 we had been walking around the property freaked the fuck out. My buddy is military trained and because he believes in such things I didn’t want freak him out but I had already started freaking out so I followed him. Anyway time goes by and we didn’t find anything but kept hearing shit or atleast I did all around his garages, yes garages, and apparently he didn’t but I would tell him when I heard a noise. We had both been hunting in our lives, me not anymore, and he was military trained, so our ears were good and ready before we were already outside. I had started only hearing noises, ofc with my schizophrenia that’s common. So we went inside and decided to sit down, watch a movie, and relax.
Also some time had gone by because my buddy started practicing his reflexes because the reason we were outside previously was because his car light wouldn’t turn off for a very long time. And it goes off everyday without a hitch 5-10 seconds after exiting the car.
I had previously been feeling like aliens or just weird because another time and with a different buddy in St. Louis my buddy and I had been up all night. That’s a ghost or alien story which I can explain in detail another time if asked. But it ended with us both in the car for 3-5 hours immediately after experiencing a clock grandfather clock going off and then stopping immediately followed by all the toys in a child’s room simultaneously going off. Stopping. Us asking who’s here and then one single toy going off by itself. Either way in St. Louis , my buddy and I decided to run immediately outside. We sat in the car, with the doors open, 5 minutes. Now granted, it was around 230-3 when we had plates down in the living room, me on the floor, him on the couch when the dog started acting weird and all that had happened in the child’s room. Long story short, some how my buddy and I had been up sitting in that car in silence somehow for 4 hours. We lost four hours when we thought it had been five. We got outside, into the car, chatted, the sun was up, and had decided to go back inside. We check the time at it was 7 am when we had known we went to “sleep” at 230-3 and not long after, the incident happened. He chalked it up to aliens and ever since iver never known what to do let alone anyone believe me. I explain this because before we went searching, I had started getting the same feeling from the night right before the toys went off.
Back to the main story, after my buddy had practiced his bow staff skills and reflexes. My buddy went to his second living room hallway where the basement door lies. This door is always locked and never left unlocked. I have also been living here for 4 months now and also stayed here plenty enough times to know that that door. Is never unlocked. His dad was long asleep and it was just us. Anyway my buddy comes in and tells me he had to re lock the basement door that of which someone had died in a few previous years ago by hanging themselves. Right after their granddaughter had died in the backyard. I told him it was as simple as the thermostat, I’m staying here till I’m on my feet. Nothing more. And I know that is one of the things in the house not to be touched and that it wasn’t me.
With this all explained we deduced to watch a movie and then eventually my buddy and I took some adderall. Idk how much he’s taken but I took 2 25 mlgs xr release pills. I’ve already texted to some extent, my buddy who’s with me now, of what has happened to me and this sort of weak story. And will return with his side of the story if there is something to add.
We had taken the adderall around 2 and decided to go to bed around 3 40. At this point I retrieved to my room after the last 4 or so minutes of a full house episode and had decided to search for something to sleep to. Then is stumbled upon chakra cleansing music. It’s been awhile and every other time has been okay with no real experience. I didn’t expect to sleep such as not many people do on 50 mlgs of this stuff.
I did not lose time or even sleep really. Instead I floated in the realm of half asleep and half awake. Back and forth half asleep, then half awake. Literally. Meanwhile focusing on my waist. Not knowing this is where the sacral chakra is. Anyway all I could dream about was super intense experiences with all kinds of cryptids and all kinds of feelings of simply being afraid and scared. Now I do not know why I kept choosing to stay “asleep” but I had “woken up” about 8 or 9 times and it was only literally 3 hours later from when I had tried to fall asleep. But every time I was awake and asleep, again as much as you can adderall. I could see cryptids as totem poles and feel those feelings. Directly from my forehead to my sacral chakra. I could feel my forehead and waist the whole time but a connection between them both and that connection was like I said. Weird interchanging lines of cryptids and feelings of being scared. It’s what I could and feel. And I woke up with a sacral chakra image on the screen. I don’t think it was individual instances of cleansing chakras because it was one frequency. It was titled Full Night All 7 Chakras Cleansing Music and Rain 7 Chakra Opening & Balance Sleep and Meditation. The link below.
https://youtu.be/MNMfGfySV9g?si=uyCVWa3ZKOP5uJRj
I think I was just tripping but what do you think? Expected ghost and shit but got this. From spooky night to bad decisions to one trippy nap!
Now I do have questions. But knowing this is a chakra known for being creative , I’m not blown away by any of this but would love anyone who knows about chakras and stuff like this to give a deeper analysis of what happened.
Thank you. Prefer to keep everything to the comments and will not reply to dms.
2024.04.27 20:46 gumballwattersons Aya Diet + Marijuana (Newbie)
Feeling stressed out about this strict diet so anything helps. Even just tips/personal experience. Thank you.
I will be attending a ceremony for the first time in two weeks. I just found out about the 2 week+ long process in cleansing. I have experience with LSD and shrooms.
I smoked weed yesterday and a little the day before which will make today exactly two weeks of no smoking. I took adderall 2 days ago as well. (This was the first time in like a month) Is this okay?
So overall that's 2 weeks of nothing.
What about Zyrtec/claritin?
Additionally, the diet is a bit overwhelming and stressing me out a bit. I plan to do pescatarian with no processed foods. (Nothing high in sodium/refined sugars) no caffeine. Vegan where possible, but I won't drive myself crazy with it. And not to mention i only have this exact period of 2 weeks because I didn't know.
I'm going to the beach tomorrow and I'm going out to eat and I wanna enjoy my time and enjoy my food because I don't really go out to eat and I want my day to be special. If I want fried foods, pescatarian is this okay? And if it isn't vegan?/some dairy
Thank you again.
Edit: wow did not expect so many people to reply with such helpful and detailed information. Can't express how grateful I am thank you. 💟
submitted by gumballwattersons to Ayahuasca [link] [comments]
I will be attending a ceremony for the first time in two weeks. I just found out about the 2 week+ long process in cleansing. I have experience with LSD and shrooms.
I smoked weed yesterday and a little the day before which will make today exactly two weeks of no smoking. I took adderall 2 days ago as well. (This was the first time in like a month) Is this okay?
So overall that's 2 weeks of nothing.
What about Zyrtec/claritin?
Additionally, the diet is a bit overwhelming and stressing me out a bit. I plan to do pescatarian with no processed foods. (Nothing high in sodium/refined sugars) no caffeine. Vegan where possible, but I won't drive myself crazy with it. And not to mention i only have this exact period of 2 weeks because I didn't know.
I'm going to the beach tomorrow and I'm going out to eat and I wanna enjoy my time and enjoy my food because I don't really go out to eat and I want my day to be special. If I want fried foods, pescatarian is this okay? And if it isn't vegan?/some dairy
Thank you again.
Edit: wow did not expect so many people to reply with such helpful and detailed information. Can't express how grateful I am thank you. 💟
2024.02.29 21:33 Personal-Winter-8111 Need advice re: stimulants
I have moderate CFS that has been gradually getting worse over the past 20+ years.
I’ve read, researched and seen multiple specialists, eastern and western practitioners , some who are quacks and some who are smart and ethical and truly trying to find a treatment for this debilitating condition. I’ve tried supplements, infusions, dietary changes, meditation, therapy, antidepressants, sleeping pills, cleanses, acupuncture, among other things.
The only thing that has moved the needle for me are stimulants. (I was on Adderall, now Vyvanse) On a good day, my “battery” can charge up to about 30% (and that is WITH the help of stimulants).
For the past year I’ve been able to function (my definition of functioning I s getting 3 or 4 productive hours out of the day) using Vyvanse. At first it was a game changer. Then wasn’t working as well. I went from 20mg to 40mg to 60mg. I tried taking breaks .. 2 or 3 days off and then using it again. At first this seemed to help but the last couple months it’s barely working anymore. I get maybe 90 minutes to 2 hours of energy on a 40mg pill. And taking another dose later on day doesn’t help (coffee has always worked the same way for me, the first cup is great but subsequent cups do nothing except make me jittery.
Has anyone else had this experience?
Has a different medication or schedule worked?
I can’t pace anymore than I have already. I already feel like a burden on my family. I have kids to take care of and I’m missing out on important events in their lives.I’ve had to stop working and now my husband is having to cut back on work because I need more help. This is a living hell and I understand why people feel hopeless.
Please respond if you have practical or proven methods that have helped.
Thank you. And sending strength and hope to all of us afflicted with this awful disease.
submitted by Personal-Winter-8111 to cfs [link] [comments]
I’ve read, researched and seen multiple specialists, eastern and western practitioners , some who are quacks and some who are smart and ethical and truly trying to find a treatment for this debilitating condition. I’ve tried supplements, infusions, dietary changes, meditation, therapy, antidepressants, sleeping pills, cleanses, acupuncture, among other things.
The only thing that has moved the needle for me are stimulants. (I was on Adderall, now Vyvanse) On a good day, my “battery” can charge up to about 30% (and that is WITH the help of stimulants).
For the past year I’ve been able to function (my definition of functioning I s getting 3 or 4 productive hours out of the day) using Vyvanse. At first it was a game changer. Then wasn’t working as well. I went from 20mg to 40mg to 60mg. I tried taking breaks .. 2 or 3 days off and then using it again. At first this seemed to help but the last couple months it’s barely working anymore. I get maybe 90 minutes to 2 hours of energy on a 40mg pill. And taking another dose later on day doesn’t help (coffee has always worked the same way for me, the first cup is great but subsequent cups do nothing except make me jittery.
Has anyone else had this experience?
Has a different medication or schedule worked?
I can’t pace anymore than I have already. I already feel like a burden on my family. I have kids to take care of and I’m missing out on important events in their lives.I’ve had to stop working and now my husband is having to cut back on work because I need more help. This is a living hell and I understand why people feel hopeless.
Please respond if you have practical or proven methods that have helped.
Thank you. And sending strength and hope to all of us afflicted with this awful disease.
2024.02.29 16:12 jumpingbean325 Medication with Sugar
I just hit two months on the candida cleanse (low carb/anti sugar diet consisting of just meat and veggies mostly + supplements) but I’m prescribed 15mg of Adderall IR daily for my ADHD (hoping I can decrease my dosage after I’m cured). Today I took my Adderall and realized that it has a sweet taste when it touches my tongue, so I did some Googling to find out there’s sugar in the pill tablet. It doesn’t say online how much sugar is in it.
I dont take it on an empty stomach, and usually take it after taking SF722 and breakfast consisting of eggs and spinach.
Has anyone had experience with this or other medications that include sugar as an inactive ingredient?
I will say, I’m feeling so much better on the cleanse at this point and my symptoms are dwindling away massively. But I’m still looking for answers as to why I’m not feeling 100% and testing negative yet.
submitted by jumpingbean325 to Candida [link] [comments]
I dont take it on an empty stomach, and usually take it after taking SF722 and breakfast consisting of eggs and spinach.
Has anyone had experience with this or other medications that include sugar as an inactive ingredient?
I will say, I’m feeling so much better on the cleanse at this point and my symptoms are dwindling away massively. But I’m still looking for answers as to why I’m not feeling 100% and testing negative yet.
2024.01.26 21:10 anangelnora First (Great) Day on Meds at 35 yo
(My adorable kitty Jiji cause I wanted to share his cuteness.)
Oh my gosh you guys. I just cannot believe it. I cannot believe a medication has finally made me feel “normal”—or even better than normal, calm and happy!
I took my first adderall today. After 15 years of trying SSRIs, antidepressants, beta blockers, antihistamines, antipsychotics and benzodiazepines, I finally got the chance to try a stimulant. And boy, do I feel at peace! I can’t believe it and I am so grateful and relieved.
My mind is calm. I’m not thinking about everything all the time. I’m not living concurrently in the past, present and future at the same time. I’m not questioning every decision I made ever. I’m not trying to find out the answer to every question that’s ever popped into my head, and I’m also not obsessing over finding those truths, or forlorn when I think myself into a corner. I feel like doing things—both for fun and to be productive. I’m not overthinking my every move. My abusive invasive thoughts have stopped. My body and brain feel, cool? Like being in a pool on a hot summer day. The best part is that I don’t feel numb either-maybe a bit loopy today-but the good stuff is still there. I’m a little sleepy and hyper but that’s because I’m finally relaxing and I’m so excited I feel okay.
I had a bad reaction to Intuniv at the end of December and I had been spiraling ever since. I had terrible heart palpitations and was only sleeping a couple hours every night for three weeks. Yesterday I had no hope for my future. I had a big decision coming up and I just kept going around and around in my head and I wasn’t getting anywhere. I thought I could never be happy or feel safe or okay. I felt incompetent and inferior. I was so scared. I felt like giving up.
As a last resort I begged my psychiatrist for a stimulant last week. He didn’t want to give me one because I was anxious and not sleeping. He had given me sleeping pills but they weren’t doing anything. My therapist (who works with ND people and is probably ADHD herself) really urged me to just try—that my anxiety was probably due to my ADHD, and the stimulant would really help me rest. When I was officially tested in The States the (separate) evaluator said the same, that I had anxiety and C-PTSD and not ADHD, reversing my prior diagnosis from Japan. He had to officially diagnose me though after seeing my TOVA results, I’m combined type.
Today really feels like it is a new day. I know it’s only the first day, but I’m excited. I suppose I could be angry that it seems like I need this medication, that ADHD is truly a disability for me, but what’s the point? I’ve been so angry and defeated for so long. Finally I have some hope.
I encourage everyone--if you are anxious or depressed or any host of symptoms that could be because of your ADHD, try treating the actual cause, our different and unique brains. I have spent 2 solid years intensely working on my C-PTSD, anxiety, lack of a sense of self, and depression. I’ve read so many books, done retreats, shamanic journeys, therapy, exercise, diet, journaling, hobbies, ketamine sessions, cleanses—you name it. I felt broken beyond repair. Of course meds aren’t for everyone, but I wanted to share my story in case anyone was like me. Please don’t be afraid and put it off for a year like I did. Trust your gut. There is hope for us who feel like we were beyond hope yet.
submitted by anangelnora to adhdwomen [link] [comments]
Oh my gosh you guys. I just cannot believe it. I cannot believe a medication has finally made me feel “normal”—or even better than normal, calm and happy!
I took my first adderall today. After 15 years of trying SSRIs, antidepressants, beta blockers, antihistamines, antipsychotics and benzodiazepines, I finally got the chance to try a stimulant. And boy, do I feel at peace! I can’t believe it and I am so grateful and relieved.
My mind is calm. I’m not thinking about everything all the time. I’m not living concurrently in the past, present and future at the same time. I’m not questioning every decision I made ever. I’m not trying to find out the answer to every question that’s ever popped into my head, and I’m also not obsessing over finding those truths, or forlorn when I think myself into a corner. I feel like doing things—both for fun and to be productive. I’m not overthinking my every move. My abusive invasive thoughts have stopped. My body and brain feel, cool? Like being in a pool on a hot summer day. The best part is that I don’t feel numb either-maybe a bit loopy today-but the good stuff is still there. I’m a little sleepy and hyper but that’s because I’m finally relaxing and I’m so excited I feel okay.
I had a bad reaction to Intuniv at the end of December and I had been spiraling ever since. I had terrible heart palpitations and was only sleeping a couple hours every night for three weeks. Yesterday I had no hope for my future. I had a big decision coming up and I just kept going around and around in my head and I wasn’t getting anywhere. I thought I could never be happy or feel safe or okay. I felt incompetent and inferior. I was so scared. I felt like giving up.
As a last resort I begged my psychiatrist for a stimulant last week. He didn’t want to give me one because I was anxious and not sleeping. He had given me sleeping pills but they weren’t doing anything. My therapist (who works with ND people and is probably ADHD herself) really urged me to just try—that my anxiety was probably due to my ADHD, and the stimulant would really help me rest. When I was officially tested in The States the (separate) evaluator said the same, that I had anxiety and C-PTSD and not ADHD, reversing my prior diagnosis from Japan. He had to officially diagnose me though after seeing my TOVA results, I’m combined type.
Today really feels like it is a new day. I know it’s only the first day, but I’m excited. I suppose I could be angry that it seems like I need this medication, that ADHD is truly a disability for me, but what’s the point? I’ve been so angry and defeated for so long. Finally I have some hope.
I encourage everyone--if you are anxious or depressed or any host of symptoms that could be because of your ADHD, try treating the actual cause, our different and unique brains. I have spent 2 solid years intensely working on my C-PTSD, anxiety, lack of a sense of self, and depression. I’ve read so many books, done retreats, shamanic journeys, therapy, exercise, diet, journaling, hobbies, ketamine sessions, cleanses—you name it. I felt broken beyond repair. Of course meds aren’t for everyone, but I wanted to share my story in case anyone was like me. Please don’t be afraid and put it off for a year like I did. Trust your gut. There is hope for us who feel like we were beyond hope yet.
2023.12.25 22:57 TechTechFruit Adderall in Union Drug Test?
I just applied for an info session for a carpenter apprenticeship and saw on the application process that there’s a drug test where I’m located. Does anyone know if they test for adderall? I have diagnosed ADHD and have it prescribed but unsure if this is like the army where that’s prohibited. Wondering if I have to go on a cleanse.
submitted by TechTechFruit to Carpentry [link] [comments]
2023.12.12 22:15 No-Management4494 Tretinoin works
I’ve been on tret for a month now and my skin so much smoother and my hormonal acne has been better than ever I can see so much difference I use to doubt it so much I honestly thought it was going to fuck up my skin even more cause I broke out so badly at the beginning but it’s going good now. I have sensitive skin and I use 0.025 twice a week.
It honestly got better when I stopped cleansing twice at day, now I only do it in the morning. I only really just cleanse and moisturize and that’s it
Vanicream Sensitive skin Cleanser and propolis light cream from cosrx and my eye bags are getting better which I hated so much cause it made me look tired and exhausted. I already have a rest bitch face so it made it look worse I’m a dude btw started using it the second I turned 18 I got it from redbox online prescription thingy it was pretty easy since tret isn’t that big of a deal and the pictures I showed them of my skin were terrible (my skin looked like shit no the photos) Also I’m yapping cause I’m on adderall too I feel like I can type forever
submitted by No-Management4494 to tretinoin [link] [comments]
It honestly got better when I stopped cleansing twice at day, now I only do it in the morning. I only really just cleanse and moisturize and that’s it
Vanicream Sensitive skin Cleanser and propolis light cream from cosrx and my eye bags are getting better which I hated so much cause it made me look tired and exhausted. I already have a rest bitch face so it made it look worse I’m a dude btw started using it the second I turned 18 I got it from redbox online prescription thingy it was pretty easy since tret isn’t that big of a deal and the pictures I showed them of my skin were terrible (my skin looked like shit no the photos) Also I’m yapping cause I’m on adderall too I feel like I can type forever
2023.12.04 21:00 Yoguyblue My Spontaneous Recovery: A Funeral, LSD, and Pink Floyd AI Videos
Hello friends.
My name is John-Thomas. I’m a 55M and have had PSSD for 15+ years following a bunch of SSRIs, SNRIs, and other anti-anxiety medications. At the same time, I was also on Adderall for ADD. Not sure if Adderall made any contribution to the PSSD but I suspect it may have.
Last month, I had an unexpected recovery of most of my symptoms. I want to share the details of the experience to see if anyone has ideas on what happened.
BACKGROUND
Like many people, I’ve been to many specialists looking for answers. All of the doctors have been dismissive, or at best stumped, that SD persisted after discontinuation of the medicine.
My main symptoms included:
- Low libido. - Complete genital and nipple numbness (like being anesthetized). Rubber penis. - Difficulty climaxing and when I do, I feel nothing pleasurable and the sexual energy dissipates. - No contractions when orgasming. Feels like a “misfiring” between my mind and my genitals. - Other senses like touch, taste, and smell are also diminished. My whole body has a numbness to it. - Brain fog.
I suspected the SSRIs for many years but did not find any supporting evidence until I stumbled upon the PSSD network about a year ago. Everything finally made complete sense between my symptoms and experience.
I have grown to accept PSSD as permanent and haven’t pursued any treatments since there haven’t really been any that look promising. I live and eat healthy. Do yoga every day. I have been fortunate to be able to have sex with cannabis and Cialis. Cannabis creates some pleasurable arousal feelings but does not help with the lack of orgasm pleasure or contractions.
SOME SPONTANEOUS RECOVERY
About a month ago I had a spontaneous and unexpected recovery of feeling in my genitals and nipples. It was after a strange combination of events:
Yesterday, I did a ketamine session. I set the intention of “letting go” and was able to do that during the experience. Afterwards, I took cannabis and had sex. It was the most pleasurable experience I can remember having in many, many years. I hope that this is also permanent, but it may just have been the lingering ketamine mixing with the cannabis. Either way, I DID experience more pleasure than I can remember having in a very long time. This is a hopeful reminder that the body CAN experience that level of pleasure again.
SO WHAT HAPPENED?
What does this strange combination have to do with PSSD recovery after 15+ years? Good question! Does anyone have any ideas?
Notes:
- I have been to funerals before. - I have done psychedelics before. - I have watched AI videos before.
More on psychedelics:
- I have done MANY different psychedelics in the last few years. Many were much more powerful than the LSD I took. Again, the psychedelics alone do not seem to do anything by themselves. - Specifically, I’ve done the same batch and dose of the LSD I took after the funeral two other times and it was very mild. The experience after the funeral was deeper. I relaxed more into it and “let go.” - During the experience of just “letting go” into the LSD (and ketamine), I could feel an energy in my brain. Hard to explain, but almost like a warmth or cleansing. Maybe similar to the SSRI brain sparkles you get when you onboard an SSRI.
Here’s my hypothesis:
I always assumed PSSD was a brain chemistry problem where neurons had been permanently damaged while on the medicines. At best, recovery would be a process over time. I am very curious about this spontaneous recovery. It did not happen over time, it was a big jump OVERNIGHT. It’s hard to quantify, but maybe 90%. I am very hopeful that I can continue to regain full sensation and performance.
I feel obligated to acknowledge that this all sounds a bit bizarre. Nonetheless, it is my experience. I have a background in science and worked in a lab at a biotech company for 25 years. I don’t understand what happened but it gives me hope of total recovery.
I very much welcome comments, questions, and ideas on what I have experienced.
Much love,
John-Thomas
P.S. The Pink Floyd video was this: https://youtu.be/FjzKMAuFUpY?si=Jnwih2i6_yc0mit-
submitted by Yoguyblue to pssdhealing [link] [comments]
My name is John-Thomas. I’m a 55M and have had PSSD for 15+ years following a bunch of SSRIs, SNRIs, and other anti-anxiety medications. At the same time, I was also on Adderall for ADD. Not sure if Adderall made any contribution to the PSSD but I suspect it may have.
Last month, I had an unexpected recovery of most of my symptoms. I want to share the details of the experience to see if anyone has ideas on what happened.
BACKGROUND
Like many people, I’ve been to many specialists looking for answers. All of the doctors have been dismissive, or at best stumped, that SD persisted after discontinuation of the medicine.
My main symptoms included:
- Low libido. - Complete genital and nipple numbness (like being anesthetized). Rubber penis. - Difficulty climaxing and when I do, I feel nothing pleasurable and the sexual energy dissipates. - No contractions when orgasming. Feels like a “misfiring” between my mind and my genitals. - Other senses like touch, taste, and smell are also diminished. My whole body has a numbness to it. - Brain fog.
I suspected the SSRIs for many years but did not find any supporting evidence until I stumbled upon the PSSD network about a year ago. Everything finally made complete sense between my symptoms and experience.
I have grown to accept PSSD as permanent and haven’t pursued any treatments since there haven’t really been any that look promising. I live and eat healthy. Do yoga every day. I have been fortunate to be able to have sex with cannabis and Cialis. Cannabis creates some pleasurable arousal feelings but does not help with the lack of orgasm pleasure or contractions.
SOME SPONTANEOUS RECOVERY
About a month ago I had a spontaneous and unexpected recovery of feeling in my genitals and nipples. It was after a strange combination of events:
- Going to a funeral
- Taking LSD
- Watching AI-generated Pink Floyd videos while on LSD
Yesterday, I did a ketamine session. I set the intention of “letting go” and was able to do that during the experience. Afterwards, I took cannabis and had sex. It was the most pleasurable experience I can remember having in many, many years. I hope that this is also permanent, but it may just have been the lingering ketamine mixing with the cannabis. Either way, I DID experience more pleasure than I can remember having in a very long time. This is a hopeful reminder that the body CAN experience that level of pleasure again.
SO WHAT HAPPENED?
What does this strange combination have to do with PSSD recovery after 15+ years? Good question! Does anyone have any ideas?
Notes:
- I have been to funerals before. - I have done psychedelics before. - I have watched AI videos before.
More on psychedelics:
- I have done MANY different psychedelics in the last few years. Many were much more powerful than the LSD I took. Again, the psychedelics alone do not seem to do anything by themselves. - Specifically, I’ve done the same batch and dose of the LSD I took after the funeral two other times and it was very mild. The experience after the funeral was deeper. I relaxed more into it and “let go.” - During the experience of just “letting go” into the LSD (and ketamine), I could feel an energy in my brain. Hard to explain, but almost like a warmth or cleansing. Maybe similar to the SSRI brain sparkles you get when you onboard an SSRI.
Here’s my hypothesis:
- The funeral got me into a very open mind state of questioning the purpose of life and how we get overly attached to things that all disappear in the end.
- The LSD effectiveness was enhanced by being in this relaxed mind state.
- The Pink Floyd AI-generated videos were constantly shifting which did not allow my mind (ego) to label what it was seeing. The ego had to finally just disengage and relax since it couldn’t make sense of what it was seeing. After a while, this forced my mind into a loosey-goosey mind state which allowed the LSD to facilitate the healing of stubborn defective neural pathways or to allow the creation of new neural pathways.
I always assumed PSSD was a brain chemistry problem where neurons had been permanently damaged while on the medicines. At best, recovery would be a process over time. I am very curious about this spontaneous recovery. It did not happen over time, it was a big jump OVERNIGHT. It’s hard to quantify, but maybe 90%. I am very hopeful that I can continue to regain full sensation and performance.
I feel obligated to acknowledge that this all sounds a bit bizarre. Nonetheless, it is my experience. I have a background in science and worked in a lab at a biotech company for 25 years. I don’t understand what happened but it gives me hope of total recovery.
I very much welcome comments, questions, and ideas on what I have experienced.
Much love,
John-Thomas
P.S. The Pink Floyd video was this: https://youtu.be/FjzKMAuFUpY?si=Jnwih2i6_yc0mit-
2023.12.04 20:35 Yoguyblue My Spontaneous Recovery: A Funeral, LSD, and Pink Floyd AI Videos
Hello friends.
My name is John-Thomas. I’m a 55M and have had PSSD for 15+ years following a bunch of SSRIs, SNRIs, and other anti-anxiety medications. At the same time, I was also on Adderall for ADD. Not sure if Adderall made any contribution to the PSSD but I suspect it may have.
Last month, I had an unexpected recovery of most of my symptoms. I want to share the details of the experience to see if anyone has ideas on what happened.
BACKGROUND
Like many people, I’ve been to many specialists looking for answers. All of the doctors have been dismissive, or at best stumped, that SD persisted after discontinuation of the medicine.
My main symptoms included:
- Low libido. - Complete genital and nipple numbness (like being anesthetized). Rubber penis. - Difficulty climaxing and when I do, I feel nothing pleasurable and the sexual energy dissipates. - No contractions when orgasming. Feels like a “misfiring” between my mind and my genitals. - Other senses like touch, taste, and smell are also diminished. My whole body has a numbness to it. - Brain fog.
I suspected the SSRIs for many years, but did not find any supporting evidence until I stumbled upon the PSSD network about a year ago. Everything finally made complete sense between my symptoms and experience.
I have grown to accept PSSD as permanent and haven’t pursued any treatments since there haven’t really been any that look promising. I live and eat healthy. Do yoga every day. I have been fortunate to be able to have sex with cannabis and Cialis. Cannabis creates some pleasurable arousal feelings but does not help with the lack of orgasm pleasure or contractions.
SOME SPONTANEOUS RECOVERY
About a month ago I had a spontaneous and unexpected recovery of feeling in my genitals and nipples. It was after a strange combination of events:
Yesterday, I did a ketamine session. I set the intention of “letting go” and was able to do that during the experience. Afterwards, I took cannabis and had sex. It was the most pleasurable experience I can remember having in many, many years. I hope that this is also permanent, but it may just have been the lingering ketamine mixing with the cannabis. Either way, I DID experience more pleasure than I can remember having in a very long time. This is a hopeful reminder that the body CAN experience that level of pleasure again.
SO WHAT HAPPENED?
What does this strange combination have to do with PSSD recovery after 15+ years? Good question! Does anyone have any ideas?
Notes:
- I have been to funerals before. - I have done psychedelics before. - I have watched AI videos before.
More on psychedelics:
- I have done MANY different psychedelics in the last few years. Many were much more powerful than the LSD I took. Again, the psychedelics alone do not seem to do anything by themselves. - Specifically, I’ve done the same batch and dose of the LSD I took after the funeral two other times and it was very mild. The experience after the funeral was deeper. I relaxed more into it and “let go.” - During the experience of just “letting go” into the LSD (and ketamine), I could feel an energy in my brain. Hard to explain, but almost like a warmth or cleansing. Maybe similar to the SSRI brain sparkles you get when you onboard an SSRI.
Here’s my hypothesis:
I always assumed PSSD was a brain chemistry problem where neurons had been permanently damaged while on the medicines. At best, recovery would be a process over time. I am very curious about this spontaneous recovery. It did not happen over time, it was a big jump OVERNIGHT. It’s hard to quantify, but maybe 90%. I am very hopeful that I can continue to regain full sensation and performance.
I feel obligated to acknowledge that this all sounds a bit bizarre. Nonetheless, it is my experience. I have a background in science and worked in a lab at a biotech company for 25 years. I don’t understand what happened but it gives me hope of total recovery.
I very much welcome comments, questions, and ideas on what I have experienced.
Much love,
John-Thomas
P.S. The Pink Floyd video was this: https://youtu.be/FjzKMAuFUpY?si=Jnwih2i6_yc0mit-
submitted by Yoguyblue to PSSD [link] [comments]
My name is John-Thomas. I’m a 55M and have had PSSD for 15+ years following a bunch of SSRIs, SNRIs, and other anti-anxiety medications. At the same time, I was also on Adderall for ADD. Not sure if Adderall made any contribution to the PSSD but I suspect it may have.
Last month, I had an unexpected recovery of most of my symptoms. I want to share the details of the experience to see if anyone has ideas on what happened.
BACKGROUND
Like many people, I’ve been to many specialists looking for answers. All of the doctors have been dismissive, or at best stumped, that SD persisted after discontinuation of the medicine.
My main symptoms included:
- Low libido. - Complete genital and nipple numbness (like being anesthetized). Rubber penis. - Difficulty climaxing and when I do, I feel nothing pleasurable and the sexual energy dissipates. - No contractions when orgasming. Feels like a “misfiring” between my mind and my genitals. - Other senses like touch, taste, and smell are also diminished. My whole body has a numbness to it. - Brain fog.
I suspected the SSRIs for many years, but did not find any supporting evidence until I stumbled upon the PSSD network about a year ago. Everything finally made complete sense between my symptoms and experience.
I have grown to accept PSSD as permanent and haven’t pursued any treatments since there haven’t really been any that look promising. I live and eat healthy. Do yoga every day. I have been fortunate to be able to have sex with cannabis and Cialis. Cannabis creates some pleasurable arousal feelings but does not help with the lack of orgasm pleasure or contractions.
SOME SPONTANEOUS RECOVERY
About a month ago I had a spontaneous and unexpected recovery of feeling in my genitals and nipples. It was after a strange combination of events:
- Going to a funeral
- Taking LSD
- Watching AI-generated Pink Floyd videos while on LSD
Yesterday, I did a ketamine session. I set the intention of “letting go” and was able to do that during the experience. Afterwards, I took cannabis and had sex. It was the most pleasurable experience I can remember having in many, many years. I hope that this is also permanent, but it may just have been the lingering ketamine mixing with the cannabis. Either way, I DID experience more pleasure than I can remember having in a very long time. This is a hopeful reminder that the body CAN experience that level of pleasure again.
SO WHAT HAPPENED?
What does this strange combination have to do with PSSD recovery after 15+ years? Good question! Does anyone have any ideas?
Notes:
- I have been to funerals before. - I have done psychedelics before. - I have watched AI videos before.
More on psychedelics:
- I have done MANY different psychedelics in the last few years. Many were much more powerful than the LSD I took. Again, the psychedelics alone do not seem to do anything by themselves. - Specifically, I’ve done the same batch and dose of the LSD I took after the funeral two other times and it was very mild. The experience after the funeral was deeper. I relaxed more into it and “let go.” - During the experience of just “letting go” into the LSD (and ketamine), I could feel an energy in my brain. Hard to explain, but almost like a warmth or cleansing. Maybe similar to the SSRI brain sparkles you get when you onboard an SSRI.
Here’s my hypothesis:
- The funeral got me into a very open mind state of questioning the purpose of life and how we get overly attached to things that all disappear in the end.
- The LSD effectiveness was enhanced by being in this relaxed mind state.
- The Pink Floyd AI-generated videos were constantly shifting which did not allow my mind (ego) to label what it was seeing. The ego had to finally just disengage and relax since it couldn’t make sense of what it was seeing. After a while, this forced my mind into a loosey-goosey mind state which allowed the LSD to facilitate the healing of stubborn defective neural pathways or to allow the creation of new neural pathways.
I always assumed PSSD was a brain chemistry problem where neurons had been permanently damaged while on the medicines. At best, recovery would be a process over time. I am very curious about this spontaneous recovery. It did not happen over time, it was a big jump OVERNIGHT. It’s hard to quantify, but maybe 90%. I am very hopeful that I can continue to regain full sensation and performance.
I feel obligated to acknowledge that this all sounds a bit bizarre. Nonetheless, it is my experience. I have a background in science and worked in a lab at a biotech company for 25 years. I don’t understand what happened but it gives me hope of total recovery.
I very much welcome comments, questions, and ideas on what I have experienced.
Much love,
John-Thomas
P.S. The Pink Floyd video was this: https://youtu.be/FjzKMAuFUpY?si=Jnwih2i6_yc0mit-
2023.11.02 02:29 itssami_sb How to shorten/rewrite an oratory speech without losing it's depth? (urgent)
For reference, I was up late a few nights ago with a ~1500 word goal and 1200+ words written. I figured "what the hell" and got the rest of it out. What I had failed to realise in my insomnia-addled adderall and caffeine induced frenzy was that not only had I abandoned my format, structure, and roadmap, but that I had also made it 20 minutes long. I've managed to rewrite it a little bit, but it's still around 15 minutes long and I've got no clue how to start over or edit it without it losing some of its key points. I had a plan and everything, but I decided to abandon it when I went all out, and now that plan is beyond my recording. I wanted to follow a format- something like harm explanation solution or something akin to that, but I just got lost. Also, the more I re-read it, the more I notice how I barely use any transitions. I haven't got a damn clue how to fix that either. At this point, I don't know if I should edit it or just flat out rewrite it.
For reference, this is what my speech looks like right now:
"The myth of Cassandra; a story so riveting yet so tragic that the world continues to revere it. A priestess of Apollo in the city of Troy, known for her remarkable beauty and gift of foresight, chosen by Apollo to be an oracle, but after rejecting his advancements, she was cursed so that none would ever heed her sights into the future.
As tragic as the legend of Cassandra is, it’s an even bigger statement that it attests to itself continuing to stand as an allegory today. From the profound blindness of the state of the world, willing or unwilling, to the voices warning the world of things to come that continue to be ignored, the irony of the stance of the story itself couldn’t be stronger. We live in an era of divide bigger than the Civil War. An era of mind-rotting ignorance, unparalleled misinformation, impeding decline so severe that experts abroad are calling our country “underdeveloped”, and a government so regressive that the Canadian government and the National Human Rights Campaign have declared America to be in a “state of emergency” as a “do not travel” zone, it’s impossible to ignore the undeniable contrast from the America we imagine.
Americans today are made to cope with all that in addition to a state of democratic erosion, violent extremism, and a boring and growing descent into fascism that began under an ignorant people throughout history and the future. This decline has been growing quietly, but one thing it hasn’t been is short-lived. A government not built to withstand the years of widespread pluralistic ignorance has only served as a detriment to the people. Today, the remaining people trying to warn the world of the future destined to come are having an increasingly harder time to have their words be heard. Today, fascism is spreading like a plague among the U.S. and world, and if this Trojan horse of hatred and disrepair continues to be ignored, it will be our plight. So first, we can construct our own symbolic effigy by examining the harms of continued restriction and censorship of facts and information and its correlation with the past. Then, we’re going to break open the path of those correlations and what they cause, and lastly, we’re going to build up the fortitude of our minds by seeing the real modern-day effects and the paths to avoiding them.
Examining modern-day censorship isn’t a simple task. The United States may pride itself on having “free speech”, but it’s certainly far from free. According to journalist Raymond Garcia of the American Library Association, the number of book bannings in the U.S. have increased extremely starting in 2021. Coming from an average of just over 300 books being challenged in 2020, that number rose to over 1200 in 2021; and as of March of this year, a record 2571 have been targeted by extremist censorship legislation. One major cause of this has been political scapegoating, which can be defined as the practice of singling out a person or group for unmerited blame and consequent negative treatment. Today, it’s used to pander to uneducated voters and get votes based on hyperbolic “issues” based in bias and fear mongering in order to distract from real voting issues that require critical thought.
Book bans have emerged from these issues, beginning with topics like “critical race theory”, and the human rights of queer and transgender teens that have been reduced to buzzwords and -isms in order to distil factual info and real groups of people into a dehumanised concept that causes reactionary voters to explode into anger and fear of something that they have and will never research. These are just some of the consequences of a regressive, ageing government making critical decisions impacting younger generations, which feeds into a positive feedback loop of sensationalist media spreading misinformation and fear. This only causes a chain reaction of hate, ignorance, and echo chambers that continue to perpetuate throughout the uneducated populace as they erode our democracy and only have the possibility for a disastrous outcome.
These continue to feed into the country’s rapid decline, but the overall gravity of the situation is what’s really dire.
You see, these events aren’t unique to today. Each of these effects have correlations to points in time that can no longer be deemed coincidences.
On the 6th of May, 1933, the first book burning of the Nazi regime took place at Das Institut für Sexualwissenschaft in Berlin, Germany, after the German union declared a nation-wide “action against the Un-German spirit” as a movement to “cleanse” any unsavoury literary information by fire. This was a research institute founded upon the creation of progressive and rational data, medical procedures, and information that had it not been destroyed, would have brought the human rights progress index forward several decades. While founder Magnus Hirschfield was abroad, Nazi groups raided the institute, stole over 50,000 books, images, and rare publications as well as thousands of other works from surrounding libraries, schools, and universities filled with information about reproductive health, sexuality, the early beginnings of research surrounding the LGBT community, contraception, intersexuality, gender affirmation surgery, and patient information and testimonials. They then gathered all of these items and burned them in front of a crowd of 40,000 people.
During WWII, roughly ¾ of all books in Germany were burned and around 80% of school libraries and their books were purged; however, it was more than just books that were purged in the burnings of WWII. Historically, an erasure like this is referred to as “cultural genocide”, which refers to a purging of the information of a culture itself in an attempt to wipe out the growth of the culture, usually during, before, or after a genocide.
This isn’t just a speech about the past. This is a speech about the present and forward. We live in an age where state senators are holding book burning events and threatening to burn more books that they find “objectionable”, and most gravely, we live in an age where the fear of genocide is now a spreading concern.
Most genocides can be separated into ten stages. The first is classification, which starts when a group is divided into an “us and them”, usually shown through segregation, stereotypes, and a disconnect between two communities. For example: WWII’s Nuremberg laws and the distinction between Aryan and Non-Aryan or Rwanda’s Hutus and Tutsis.
Symbolisation precedes classification by assigning certain symbols or attributes, like the Khmer Rouge’s implementation of the blue scarf for those from the East bank. The yellow star of David on the clothing of the Jews or the pink triangle for homosexuals in Nazi Germany. Most of us already know of the third stage.
Discrimination—as defined by the Genocide Education Project, is when a dominant group uses law, custom, and political power to deny the rights of other groups. Residential schools in Northern America creating cultural genocide and ethnic cleansing towards the indigenous. Jim Crow laws of segregated America. The sterilisation of Uyghur Muslims in modern China.
Number 4, dehumanisation, is defined when one group treats another group as less than human. Members of a persecuted group may be compared with animals, parasites, insects or diseases. “Savages” for natives in the colonial Americas. “Cockroaches” for the Tutsis in Rwanda. “Vermin” for the jews in WWII.
After that is organisation. Genocides aren’t random, and are carried out when the oppressive power plans and organises forces to eliminate the victim. The Nazis’ and Khmer Rouge’s Gestapo–secret police– and SS units. ISIS as a whole. The Ku Klux Klan.
Polarisation—stage six—is when oppressors plant extremism, propaganda, assassination, and hate-driven fear mongering to incite violence and disparity between the groups. For example: the Nazis’ use of propaganda newspaper Der Stürmer to incite fear mongering and hate.
Preparation is the stage that follows, being enacted by euphemism-shrouded plans as “problems”, “questions”, or “solutions”, often disguised as “self defence”. The collection of a database of the names and information of every Jew/non-Aryan in the third reich and the construction of concentration camps and firing squads. Labour camps for Japanese-Americans. The Trail of Tears and “Indian removal act”. They build armies, buy weapons and train their troops and militias, and indoctrinate the populace with fear of the victim group.
Active genocide begins with persecution. Victims are identified and separated out because of their status. The starvation of Uyghurs in China’s labour camps. Armenian ethnic cleansing. Machete lashings and sexual violence of the Rwandan Tutsis. Concentration camps and medical experiments of WWII. Death lists are drawn up. Some members of victim groups may be forced to wear identifying symbols. Their property is often confiscated. Oftentimes, they’re separated into ghettos, deported into camps, made slaves, or confined to a famine-struck region and starved. This stage is when genocidal massacres begin.
Stage 9. Extermination. It should come as no surprise as to what this means. The identified hate group doesn’t kill their victims. They exterminate them, because to them, their victims are less than human. Gas chambers. Firing squads. Lynching. Lashing. Hanging. Forced suicide. Starvation. Adults and children alike, all subhumanly executed.
It’s not hard to see these things when you look deep enough below the surface. By now, you probably know enough about the genocides of the past, but like I said before, this isn’t a speech about the past.
You see, our modern day society has never been more advanced, and yet still today, we can still observe patterns that follow this so closely that they can’t be coincidences.
Stage one. Israelis- “the children of light” and Palestinians- “the children of darkness”. Transgender vs cisgender with the concept of “biological gender”.
Have you caught on yet?
Stage two. Colour-coded IDs for Palestinians and Israelis. A sign on IDs in the US if someone has changed their legal gender.
Stage three. The barring of trans people from bathrooms, sports, and any space that deems them as a threat. The apartheid in Israel, setting out land seizures, tariffs, and denial of citizenship for Palestinians.
Stage four. Israeli officials labelling Palestinians as “human animals”. The addressing of trans people as “freaks”, “demons”, and some other words I’d care to not repeat.
Stage five. Israeli explosives and blockades following a convoy along the Gaza strip. 583 discriminatory bills and counting such as Florida’s implementation of legal kidnapping of children under queer adults and felony charges for getting gender-affirming care under the age of 26, and several “anonymous tip lines” to “report transgender activity” in many different states.
Stage six. Hate speech, crimes, groups, and propaganda at a never seen before high, with disgusting and blatantly false media like Turning Point USA spreading like wildfire, statements like Florida republican rep. Randy Fine's “if it means erasing a community because you have to target children, then, damn right, we ought to do it!” and CPAC speaker Michael Knowles vehemently ranting that “transgenderism must be eradicated from public life entirely.”
Stage seven. The eerily familiar “grand plan” and “Greater Israel Project” to annex surrounding nations like Lebanon and Jordan along with Palestine to create a “superior” ethnostate. The agenda of a “trans problem” and a collection of names and information to form a trans database.
Stage eight. This is where the line ends for us in America, but in Gaza, all outside travel, aid, and resources have been completely cut off, leaving over 2 million people with no access to medical care, anaesthetic, food, water, and power, leaving doctors to have to resort to doing surgeries not only without anaesthesia, but completely outside and without antiseptic, and leaving any hospital that remained without any power to run life support or NICUs.
Stage nine. 1 million people in Northern Gaza are forced to evacuate, facing the ultimatum of almost certainly dying or being victims of an ethnic cleanse, the use of white phosphorus bombs, and enough air strikes to constitute the same amount of damage as Hiroshima. Hospitals, neighbourhoods, schools, places of worship, all destroyed, children writing their names on their arms so their bodies could be identified, cats, dogs, adults, elders, and infants all trapped and suffocating under rubble, and fathers carrying around garbage bags full of the mutilated remains of their dead children.
And now, the tenth stage. Denial. Evidence is destroyed, victims and witnesses are intimidated, and propaganda continues to be spread—all creating an additional tax of survivor’s guilt.
Today, the U.S. and Israel both deny any wrongdoing, using the false veils of “protecting children” and “self defence”.
As of finishing this speech, the rising death toll in Gaza has reached over 7000, with over 3000- almost half of those deaths being children. To put that into perspective, the attacks of 11 Sep, 2001 killed 2977 people.
Meanwhile, politicians’ main targets are trans kids. This has caused the suicide prospect rate to grow to over 82% with attempted suicide rates reaching over one million people ages 10-18.
It takes no genius to see our democracy eroding before our eyes and that the rise of fascism, complacency, and sensationalism is ending lives at a scale the world hasn’t seen in a long time.
So now, I ask you: what side of history will you be on?
People are begging us to listen. I’ll say it now; we cannot afford to be complacent. This is affecting humans. This is affecting you. This is affecting me because I’m a part of that 41%.
I can count on a hand how many times I’ve almost taken my own life. I can’t, however, do the same for the amount of times I’ve wanted to, nor can I for the amount of times I’ve harmed myself when I was at my lowest. I am a queer child, and it seems to me that the word queer is making everyone overlook the word child. We’re always fairly regular people. All of the people facing this kind of violence are just people. People with hobbies and friends and loved ones and weird eating habits and quirky mannerisms, but all at once, they’re people that never asked for any of this.
I’ll save the flowery “friendship is magic” speech, but I will say this:
Unity triumphs over power. Change is best made by community. Protest and unrest across the globe isn’t for naught. The rise in awareness has reached the highest powers, as just recently, our outrage has been heard by the UN, who responded by voting for a ceasefire on the siege in Gaza. Unity works. So, here’s how you can help close the gate to fascism.
Number one: write letters, and write lots of them. Mail directly to your senators, your city office, your representatives- anyone you can think of that relies on you as a constituent. Number two: make calls. The more calls the better. Call anyone that can do something and hold your ground in your power as a constituent; they depend on your vote. Number three: show your support whether it be through acts of solidarity, active protesting, or signing petitions. Number four: spread awareness. The number one way to combat fascism is to make everyone aware of it. Tell everyone. Don’t ever shut up about it. Ensure that your words impact on whoever's ears they fall upon. People around us are in the centre of a wooden horse, and it’s our job to free them.
It was Dr. King who said injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. Today, fascism and genocide are the biggest threats to justice that the world has ever seen. It's imperative to remember these words, because those that forget history are doomed to repeat it. I’ve mentioned several points in this speech, from scapegoating and censorship to history and solutions, so let me repeat the importance of making a difference. I need you to imagine what you'd do if it were you trapped under the rubble? How'd you feel if you were me? Everyone here is in charge of making the world what they want it to become.What side of history do you want to be on? How will the world remember you?
I promise you: your time and consideration has been worth it, and I hope you feel differently than you did before."
What are your tips/suggestions?
submitted by itssami_sb to Debate [link] [comments]
For reference, this is what my speech looks like right now:
"The myth of Cassandra; a story so riveting yet so tragic that the world continues to revere it. A priestess of Apollo in the city of Troy, known for her remarkable beauty and gift of foresight, chosen by Apollo to be an oracle, but after rejecting his advancements, she was cursed so that none would ever heed her sights into the future.
As tragic as the legend of Cassandra is, it’s an even bigger statement that it attests to itself continuing to stand as an allegory today. From the profound blindness of the state of the world, willing or unwilling, to the voices warning the world of things to come that continue to be ignored, the irony of the stance of the story itself couldn’t be stronger. We live in an era of divide bigger than the Civil War. An era of mind-rotting ignorance, unparalleled misinformation, impeding decline so severe that experts abroad are calling our country “underdeveloped”, and a government so regressive that the Canadian government and the National Human Rights Campaign have declared America to be in a “state of emergency” as a “do not travel” zone, it’s impossible to ignore the undeniable contrast from the America we imagine.
Americans today are made to cope with all that in addition to a state of democratic erosion, violent extremism, and a boring and growing descent into fascism that began under an ignorant people throughout history and the future. This decline has been growing quietly, but one thing it hasn’t been is short-lived. A government not built to withstand the years of widespread pluralistic ignorance has only served as a detriment to the people. Today, the remaining people trying to warn the world of the future destined to come are having an increasingly harder time to have their words be heard. Today, fascism is spreading like a plague among the U.S. and world, and if this Trojan horse of hatred and disrepair continues to be ignored, it will be our plight. So first, we can construct our own symbolic effigy by examining the harms of continued restriction and censorship of facts and information and its correlation with the past. Then, we’re going to break open the path of those correlations and what they cause, and lastly, we’re going to build up the fortitude of our minds by seeing the real modern-day effects and the paths to avoiding them.
Examining modern-day censorship isn’t a simple task. The United States may pride itself on having “free speech”, but it’s certainly far from free. According to journalist Raymond Garcia of the American Library Association, the number of book bannings in the U.S. have increased extremely starting in 2021. Coming from an average of just over 300 books being challenged in 2020, that number rose to over 1200 in 2021; and as of March of this year, a record 2571 have been targeted by extremist censorship legislation. One major cause of this has been political scapegoating, which can be defined as the practice of singling out a person or group for unmerited blame and consequent negative treatment. Today, it’s used to pander to uneducated voters and get votes based on hyperbolic “issues” based in bias and fear mongering in order to distract from real voting issues that require critical thought.
Book bans have emerged from these issues, beginning with topics like “critical race theory”, and the human rights of queer and transgender teens that have been reduced to buzzwords and -isms in order to distil factual info and real groups of people into a dehumanised concept that causes reactionary voters to explode into anger and fear of something that they have and will never research. These are just some of the consequences of a regressive, ageing government making critical decisions impacting younger generations, which feeds into a positive feedback loop of sensationalist media spreading misinformation and fear. This only causes a chain reaction of hate, ignorance, and echo chambers that continue to perpetuate throughout the uneducated populace as they erode our democracy and only have the possibility for a disastrous outcome.
These continue to feed into the country’s rapid decline, but the overall gravity of the situation is what’s really dire.
You see, these events aren’t unique to today. Each of these effects have correlations to points in time that can no longer be deemed coincidences.
On the 6th of May, 1933, the first book burning of the Nazi regime took place at Das Institut für Sexualwissenschaft in Berlin, Germany, after the German union declared a nation-wide “action against the Un-German spirit” as a movement to “cleanse” any unsavoury literary information by fire. This was a research institute founded upon the creation of progressive and rational data, medical procedures, and information that had it not been destroyed, would have brought the human rights progress index forward several decades. While founder Magnus Hirschfield was abroad, Nazi groups raided the institute, stole over 50,000 books, images, and rare publications as well as thousands of other works from surrounding libraries, schools, and universities filled with information about reproductive health, sexuality, the early beginnings of research surrounding the LGBT community, contraception, intersexuality, gender affirmation surgery, and patient information and testimonials. They then gathered all of these items and burned them in front of a crowd of 40,000 people.
During WWII, roughly ¾ of all books in Germany were burned and around 80% of school libraries and their books were purged; however, it was more than just books that were purged in the burnings of WWII. Historically, an erasure like this is referred to as “cultural genocide”, which refers to a purging of the information of a culture itself in an attempt to wipe out the growth of the culture, usually during, before, or after a genocide.
This isn’t just a speech about the past. This is a speech about the present and forward. We live in an age where state senators are holding book burning events and threatening to burn more books that they find “objectionable”, and most gravely, we live in an age where the fear of genocide is now a spreading concern.
Most genocides can be separated into ten stages. The first is classification, which starts when a group is divided into an “us and them”, usually shown through segregation, stereotypes, and a disconnect between two communities. For example: WWII’s Nuremberg laws and the distinction between Aryan and Non-Aryan or Rwanda’s Hutus and Tutsis.
Symbolisation precedes classification by assigning certain symbols or attributes, like the Khmer Rouge’s implementation of the blue scarf for those from the East bank. The yellow star of David on the clothing of the Jews or the pink triangle for homosexuals in Nazi Germany. Most of us already know of the third stage.
Discrimination—as defined by the Genocide Education Project, is when a dominant group uses law, custom, and political power to deny the rights of other groups. Residential schools in Northern America creating cultural genocide and ethnic cleansing towards the indigenous. Jim Crow laws of segregated America. The sterilisation of Uyghur Muslims in modern China.
Number 4, dehumanisation, is defined when one group treats another group as less than human. Members of a persecuted group may be compared with animals, parasites, insects or diseases. “Savages” for natives in the colonial Americas. “Cockroaches” for the Tutsis in Rwanda. “Vermin” for the jews in WWII.
After that is organisation. Genocides aren’t random, and are carried out when the oppressive power plans and organises forces to eliminate the victim. The Nazis’ and Khmer Rouge’s Gestapo–secret police– and SS units. ISIS as a whole. The Ku Klux Klan.
Polarisation—stage six—is when oppressors plant extremism, propaganda, assassination, and hate-driven fear mongering to incite violence and disparity between the groups. For example: the Nazis’ use of propaganda newspaper Der Stürmer to incite fear mongering and hate.
Preparation is the stage that follows, being enacted by euphemism-shrouded plans as “problems”, “questions”, or “solutions”, often disguised as “self defence”. The collection of a database of the names and information of every Jew/non-Aryan in the third reich and the construction of concentration camps and firing squads. Labour camps for Japanese-Americans. The Trail of Tears and “Indian removal act”. They build armies, buy weapons and train their troops and militias, and indoctrinate the populace with fear of the victim group.
Active genocide begins with persecution. Victims are identified and separated out because of their status. The starvation of Uyghurs in China’s labour camps. Armenian ethnic cleansing. Machete lashings and sexual violence of the Rwandan Tutsis. Concentration camps and medical experiments of WWII. Death lists are drawn up. Some members of victim groups may be forced to wear identifying symbols. Their property is often confiscated. Oftentimes, they’re separated into ghettos, deported into camps, made slaves, or confined to a famine-struck region and starved. This stage is when genocidal massacres begin.
Stage 9. Extermination. It should come as no surprise as to what this means. The identified hate group doesn’t kill their victims. They exterminate them, because to them, their victims are less than human. Gas chambers. Firing squads. Lynching. Lashing. Hanging. Forced suicide. Starvation. Adults and children alike, all subhumanly executed.
It’s not hard to see these things when you look deep enough below the surface. By now, you probably know enough about the genocides of the past, but like I said before, this isn’t a speech about the past.
You see, our modern day society has never been more advanced, and yet still today, we can still observe patterns that follow this so closely that they can’t be coincidences.
Stage one. Israelis- “the children of light” and Palestinians- “the children of darkness”. Transgender vs cisgender with the concept of “biological gender”.
Have you caught on yet?
Stage two. Colour-coded IDs for Palestinians and Israelis. A sign on IDs in the US if someone has changed their legal gender.
Stage three. The barring of trans people from bathrooms, sports, and any space that deems them as a threat. The apartheid in Israel, setting out land seizures, tariffs, and denial of citizenship for Palestinians.
Stage four. Israeli officials labelling Palestinians as “human animals”. The addressing of trans people as “freaks”, “demons”, and some other words I’d care to not repeat.
Stage five. Israeli explosives and blockades following a convoy along the Gaza strip. 583 discriminatory bills and counting such as Florida’s implementation of legal kidnapping of children under queer adults and felony charges for getting gender-affirming care under the age of 26, and several “anonymous tip lines” to “report transgender activity” in many different states.
Stage six. Hate speech, crimes, groups, and propaganda at a never seen before high, with disgusting and blatantly false media like Turning Point USA spreading like wildfire, statements like Florida republican rep. Randy Fine's “if it means erasing a community because you have to target children, then, damn right, we ought to do it!” and CPAC speaker Michael Knowles vehemently ranting that “transgenderism must be eradicated from public life entirely.”
Stage seven. The eerily familiar “grand plan” and “Greater Israel Project” to annex surrounding nations like Lebanon and Jordan along with Palestine to create a “superior” ethnostate. The agenda of a “trans problem” and a collection of names and information to form a trans database.
Stage eight. This is where the line ends for us in America, but in Gaza, all outside travel, aid, and resources have been completely cut off, leaving over 2 million people with no access to medical care, anaesthetic, food, water, and power, leaving doctors to have to resort to doing surgeries not only without anaesthesia, but completely outside and without antiseptic, and leaving any hospital that remained without any power to run life support or NICUs.
Stage nine. 1 million people in Northern Gaza are forced to evacuate, facing the ultimatum of almost certainly dying or being victims of an ethnic cleanse, the use of white phosphorus bombs, and enough air strikes to constitute the same amount of damage as Hiroshima. Hospitals, neighbourhoods, schools, places of worship, all destroyed, children writing their names on their arms so their bodies could be identified, cats, dogs, adults, elders, and infants all trapped and suffocating under rubble, and fathers carrying around garbage bags full of the mutilated remains of their dead children.
And now, the tenth stage. Denial. Evidence is destroyed, victims and witnesses are intimidated, and propaganda continues to be spread—all creating an additional tax of survivor’s guilt.
Today, the U.S. and Israel both deny any wrongdoing, using the false veils of “protecting children” and “self defence”.
As of finishing this speech, the rising death toll in Gaza has reached over 7000, with over 3000- almost half of those deaths being children. To put that into perspective, the attacks of 11 Sep, 2001 killed 2977 people.
Meanwhile, politicians’ main targets are trans kids. This has caused the suicide prospect rate to grow to over 82% with attempted suicide rates reaching over one million people ages 10-18.
It takes no genius to see our democracy eroding before our eyes and that the rise of fascism, complacency, and sensationalism is ending lives at a scale the world hasn’t seen in a long time.
So now, I ask you: what side of history will you be on?
People are begging us to listen. I’ll say it now; we cannot afford to be complacent. This is affecting humans. This is affecting you. This is affecting me because I’m a part of that 41%.
I can count on a hand how many times I’ve almost taken my own life. I can’t, however, do the same for the amount of times I’ve wanted to, nor can I for the amount of times I’ve harmed myself when I was at my lowest. I am a queer child, and it seems to me that the word queer is making everyone overlook the word child. We’re always fairly regular people. All of the people facing this kind of violence are just people. People with hobbies and friends and loved ones and weird eating habits and quirky mannerisms, but all at once, they’re people that never asked for any of this.
I’ll save the flowery “friendship is magic” speech, but I will say this:
Unity triumphs over power. Change is best made by community. Protest and unrest across the globe isn’t for naught. The rise in awareness has reached the highest powers, as just recently, our outrage has been heard by the UN, who responded by voting for a ceasefire on the siege in Gaza. Unity works. So, here’s how you can help close the gate to fascism.
Number one: write letters, and write lots of them. Mail directly to your senators, your city office, your representatives- anyone you can think of that relies on you as a constituent. Number two: make calls. The more calls the better. Call anyone that can do something and hold your ground in your power as a constituent; they depend on your vote. Number three: show your support whether it be through acts of solidarity, active protesting, or signing petitions. Number four: spread awareness. The number one way to combat fascism is to make everyone aware of it. Tell everyone. Don’t ever shut up about it. Ensure that your words impact on whoever's ears they fall upon. People around us are in the centre of a wooden horse, and it’s our job to free them.
It was Dr. King who said injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. Today, fascism and genocide are the biggest threats to justice that the world has ever seen. It's imperative to remember these words, because those that forget history are doomed to repeat it. I’ve mentioned several points in this speech, from scapegoating and censorship to history and solutions, so let me repeat the importance of making a difference. I need you to imagine what you'd do if it were you trapped under the rubble? How'd you feel if you were me? Everyone here is in charge of making the world what they want it to become.What side of history do you want to be on? How will the world remember you?
I promise you: your time and consideration has been worth it, and I hope you feel differently than you did before."
What are your tips/suggestions?
2023.10.05 21:43 Belladonna711 Some Frequently Asked Questions
Fellow Quareians,
As of late, I’ve noticed many questions that have been answered in length in the past being asked again and again whether it be in the subreddit or the Discord. As such, I thought it might be helpful if I could compile what JMC has said in the past or what others in the community have said to address these questions in a bit of an extended FAQ to what is already on the Quareia website.
I have also chosen to link the Meditation Tips sticky in the section about meditation. In addition, the Resources and Links post(which contains a link to the Study Guide that is far more extensive) can also be accessed here.
Additionally, I have also chosen to link the post regarding a newly instated rule about exorcism referrals and some FAQs, which can be found here. I hope this also serves as a reminder to please refrain from making such posts, as they will be removed immediately. If you need parasite assistance, there is also a list below in the section about Parasites and Basic Magical Defense, which consolidates some of our members' experiences with them.
Negative Consequences of Quareia/Change
Practical/Results Magic
ADHD, Dyslexia, Depression, Medication, and Chronic Illnesses
Proper Journals and Documenting
Meditation/Open Flames
Ritual Baths/Showers
Directions within the Southern Hemisphere
Parasites/Basic Magical Defense
Limited Space
In regards to the other systems, I have also compiled some of our members’ thoughts and responses in specific systems.
On Bardon: Members u/joyousdark has talked about the similarities and differences here, and another member has discussed the combining of the two systems here.
On Golden Dawn: u/Skhokho_sami has talked about their experiences with GD here, and some more members’ experiences are posted here. In addition, here is a comment about the overuse of the LBRP and what it can do here.
In conclusion, learn to assess the situation and decide if it is right for your personal situation to carry on with the course.
It has also been asked if it requires an open flame(the answer is yes), and how to adapt it if that is not possible. For more specifications, please refer to the study guide(in the meditation section), and also this post. In the end, it's probably better to do it without a candle than to not do it at all. To quote the study guide on this:
u/Fushite also has many posts documenting their experiences working in a new age store, and dealing with the energetic dirtiness and consequences of that. Some of the advice there can also be referenced if one finds themselves in a parasited or dirty environment that they cannot move away or disengage from.
This comment discusses the user and some steps they took in addressing the parasite they’re currently dealing with. Some of these methods can be utilized as well.
This post talks about the situation of a hostile statue, and some advice here can be applied if one comes across a similar situation of beings within objects.
This post documents a member’s struggle with parasites, on which JMC has also commented about what next steps or potential advice would be, especially when methods listed above are not taking care of the entire problem.
Most recent edits and additions: added Discord link
submitted by Belladonna711 to Quareia [link] [comments]
As of late, I’ve noticed many questions that have been answered in length in the past being asked again and again whether it be in the subreddit or the Discord. As such, I thought it might be helpful if I could compile what JMC has said in the past or what others in the community have said to address these questions in a bit of an extended FAQ to what is already on the Quareia website.
I have also chosen to link the Meditation Tips sticky in the section about meditation. In addition, the Resources and Links post(which contains a link to the Study Guide that is far more extensive) can also be accessed here.
Additionally, I have also chosen to link the post regarding a newly instated rule about exorcism referrals and some FAQs, which can be found here. I hope this also serves as a reminder to please refrain from making such posts, as they will be removed immediately. If you need parasite assistance, there is also a list below in the section about Parasites and Basic Magical Defense, which consolidates some of our members' experiences with them.
Table of Contents:
Other Systems (Bardon, Golden Dawn)Negative Consequences of Quareia/Change
Practical/Results Magic
ADHD, Dyslexia, Depression, Medication, and Chronic Illnesses
Proper Journals and Documenting
Meditation/Open Flames
Ritual Baths/Showers
Directions within the Southern Hemisphere
Parasites/Basic Magical Defense
Limited Space
Other Systems
The practice of 2 different systems side by side is, while not necessarily recommended, a choice to make on your own. However, as long as you keep the two practices separate, it should be okay at least in the short term before you choose a direction to follow.In regards to the other systems, I have also compiled some of our members’ thoughts and responses in specific systems.
On Bardon: Members u/joyousdark has talked about the similarities and differences here, and another member has discussed the combining of the two systems here.
On Golden Dawn: u/Skhokho_sami has talked about their experiences with GD here, and some more members’ experiences are posted here. In addition, here is a comment about the overuse of the LBRP and what it can do here.
Negative Consequences of Quareia / Change
The bottom line is, Quareia will trigger what is needed or necessary for progression and learning. This is talked about by our members here, as well as here. I myself have traveled halfway across the world after starting Quareia, for example, but now I am in a far better environment than I ever was. The brunt of it seems to boil down to the following:I don’t think Quareia invites disaster, but rather change. Some changes are very difficult to accept or deal at first, others are not. From what I've seen other experienced magicians talking about, that is not exclusive to Quareia. Any magical path will change your life, and you won't know how these changes will happen or affect your life until it does happen.
Practical / Results Magic:
Quareia does not actively teach, nor does JMC suggest the usage of results magic, at least to my knowledge. The reasons are discussed by one of our members here, and u/Quareia (Josephine herself) has discussed true need and wants here. I have put in quotes here part of the comment, and this is expanded upon in the full post:Without the buffering and filtering that comes from working in service, your insistent pull of power for the now can also batter your physical body, burn serotonin, and bring to the surface within you latent disease.
Perhaps most importantly, we often don't know what's really good for us. By insisting for something to happen in a particular way, you may be blocking your path to a much better, more exciting, more fulfilling outcome.
ADHD, Dyslexia, Depression, Medication and Chronic Illnesses
Such disorders are not a strict bar from entry, but means you will likely have to learn how to best adapt to suit the way you function. On medication, this post discusses the usage of Adderall in magic, and this blog post from Josephine also touches on it. This post discusses mental health and magic as a whole, and this video from Foolish Fish is about the same subject. This post, though deleted by the user, also has many comments tackling the subject. This post is about the wider discussion of chronic illnesses and magic.In conclusion, learn to assess the situation and decide if it is right for your personal situation to carry on with the course.
Proper Journals and Documenting
Josephine has made a post on the Quareia website, and it can be read here. Below are the ones about journals specifically:For your main journaling, essays and written tasks, use the computer and save them in online folders. THE FOLLOWING IS IMPORTANT. Have a folder for each module, and sub folders for each lesson. Ensure your name, the date and the lesson + module number is at the top of each page.As of right now, I do not believe the meditation journals must be turned in, they are just for yourself. Everything else seems to need documenting. In addition, it is suggested that the notes be handwritten as practice for contacted writing later on, though they will need to be typed up for submission. For those unable to do so, it is fine to simply do it digitally, though try to practice writing when possible.
When I say, write down your impressions and observations, I mean that. I do not mean write a single line saying you have done it. Many have been turned away from joining the debate group, and some have been turned away from mentoring because their notes are not notes, they are a list of jobs done.
Meditation / Open Flame
Meditation tips stickied postIt has also been asked if it requires an open flame(the answer is yes), and how to adapt it if that is not possible. For more specifications, please refer to the study guide(in the meditation section), and also this post. In the end, it's probably better to do it without a candle than to not do it at all. To quote the study guide on this:
Working with fire and flame is a major part of magic, and being able to be still before a flame is a basic skill that you will need.As well as Josephine's comment:
if you really cannot get away with any sort of candle at all (some good ideas below... tea light in a bowl etc)... then do the meditation without... but imagine in your mind that you are sat before a flame. And then when you can, work with a flame.
Ritual Baths/Showers
Josephine has covered this information on another post, linked here. The most pertinent section is here:The bucket in the shower is a way to go if you do not have access to a bath if you are a student, but if there is a real and serious need for it, and you don't have a bath, then turning up on a friends doorstep (who has a bath) might not make you popular but at least you can get it done.The important thing to note is that as you are not able to “soak” in the waters, it is less effective, but a ritual shower can work in a pinch. However, be sure to cover your entire body.
Directions within the Southern Hemisphere
The general consensus on this is that the directions are "inner directions", and therefore should not be changed. Unfortunately, as it seems, Josephine has not actively lived within the Southern Hemisphere, so students based there may have to experiment there on their own. If anyone has experience with that, I would highly appreciate further input on this section. There is a post Josephine made on the Quareia website about it, which you can read here. The most applicable part is below:For the most part magical directional patterns in Quareia are not land based, but are inner based, but I was not sure how that would work out ‘down under’. However, now that some students in the southern hemisphere have been working the system for a while, it has become very obvious from their notes and results, that the magical pattern itself stays the same regardless of where they are. Essentially the pattern works with creation/destruction, stasis, and time regardless of location.
Parasites / Basic Magical Defense
The most basic and common advice is that this is where the Module 1 content comes in. Your first line of defense will, almost always, be starting with the ritual baths/cleansing, the talismans if the condition is dire or if it is necessary, and the divination skills that are taught in Lesson 2 in order to assess the situation as well as finding out what the problem is or what the next steps are. I have put some links of other members’ stories and the advice they received, for reference of those who are finding themselves with this issue.u/Fushite also has many posts documenting their experiences working in a new age store, and dealing with the energetic dirtiness and consequences of that. Some of the advice there can also be referenced if one finds themselves in a parasited or dirty environment that they cannot move away or disengage from.
This comment discusses the user and some steps they took in addressing the parasite they’re currently dealing with. Some of these methods can be utilized as well.
This post talks about the situation of a hostile statue, and some advice here can be applied if one comes across a similar situation of beings within objects.
This post documents a member’s struggle with parasites, on which JMC has also commented about what next steps or potential advice would be, especially when methods listed above are not taking care of the entire problem.
Limited Space for Ritual
One option is to do the ritual in vision, but that does not solve the problem of being unable to physically engram the actions. This post I made a while back had some suggestions about using a smaller part of a room only(and just... kind of shuffle around the altars). This post discusses ritual work in public spaces/with roommates. The other option is to go outside to do the ritual -- if you choose to go down that route, please be mindful of the environment and clean up afterwards. I have put a quote of the most helpful comment here:If you can clear a space large enough to turn around in a full circle with your arms outstretched, you can physically do this ritual. Yes, it will be cramped/tight but you can do it. You don't need to walk around the whole room, just the altars.
Use a corner of the room. Really constrained space, but private, not windy. Maybe not walking around central altar so much as stepping around it.
Discord Server
It’s also unofficial, but here is the permanent link: https://discord.gg/bP86Nhq5wk (updated)Conclusion and Thoughts
That’s all I have for now! This is still also going to be updated as time goes on, and I hope this is of at least some assistance. Furthermore, I'd recommend fellow students to look at what others have said about these topics in the past, as there are countless wonderfully thought provoking and inspiring posts. There is much to be learned from the past. Good luck to everyone!Most recent edits and additions: added Discord link
2023.07.19 05:56 Rough-Mud7849 What is wrong with my body?! Week 7 about to be on week 8 only down 10lbs despite significantly decreased hunger and interest in food.
Just to clarify I have been overweight since I was a child. Once I was about 6 years old (I am 30 now) I got a belly that I never lost and have severely struggled with trying to be “thin” my entire life. I have also been on multiple diets as well as concerta, Wellbutrin, adderall, and vyvanse throughout my life since I was 8 years old. I’ve tried everything from raw vegan, expensive fat camps, bulimia, juice cleanses, personal trainers you name it…I’VE DONE IT! And not by my own choice much of the time might I add. My diet was heavily influenced by my parents who were very concerned and also very ashamed of my weight problem.
I stopped my adhd meds for about 2 years when I was 25 and gained a tremendous amount of weight (60lbs) in that time. I went back on the vyvanse and lost it. Once the weight loss stopped and I actually gained some back I went on semaglutide.
I’ve noticed a significant decrease in hunger and interest in food even on my days off my meds. But I have noticed very slow weight loss even though I am eating much less and have been much more active.
I’ve only lost 9-8 pounds in the nearly 7 weeks I’ve been on it. I am at my wits end. I just want to get rid of my fat stomach and nothing I do will work!
submitted by Rough-Mud7849 to Ozempic [link] [comments]
I stopped my adhd meds for about 2 years when I was 25 and gained a tremendous amount of weight (60lbs) in that time. I went back on the vyvanse and lost it. Once the weight loss stopped and I actually gained some back I went on semaglutide.
I’ve noticed a significant decrease in hunger and interest in food even on my days off my meds. But I have noticed very slow weight loss even though I am eating much less and have been much more active.
I’ve only lost 9-8 pounds in the nearly 7 weeks I’ve been on it. I am at my wits end. I just want to get rid of my fat stomach and nothing I do will work!
2023.07.18 23:40 hypersomni [Product Question] COSRX whitehead liquid vs. TO AHA 30% + BHA 2% peeling mask?
Hey guys! I am struggling with making a decision on whether to try the COSRX whitehead power liquid or the TO peeling mask. I've heard such great things about both products and I cannot decide. Truthfully my budget is not large and I'd rather only have to buy one product :-c
I've been suffering from Adderall-induced acne for over a year now. My skin is very very congested, my pores fill up with sebum on the daily. My skin tone has become uneven with red marks, they fade eventually but it takes a while. I'm starting to get some minor acne scarring as well. The sebum bumps (closed comedones?) are mostly on my chin, sides of face, and forehead, especially between my eyebrows. Oftentimes they'll turn into angry whiteheads.
I have tried red box Stridex and it seemingly does nothing. My skin is very oily but dry at the same time, it feels horrendous and dull.
Currently, my routine is the same morning and night.
-Aveeno Oat Cleanser, rinse with water, use face towel to dry gently and exfoliate
-Cosrx snail mucin 96
-Cetaphil Soothing Aloe Gel Cream
I try to do Stridex like every other night after cleansing and let it sit for 15 minutes. I feel tingly like it's getting in my pores but I haven't noticed it ever doing anything....
I've been using that cleanser and moisturizer bc I had the idea in my head that my skin doesn't like fatty alcohols, but I don't even know if that's true. I'm almost out of both of them and I'm wanting to switch to Cerave Foaming Cleanser and Cerave Daily Moisturizer. I am also planning to incorporate the Biore UV aqua rich sunscreen into my routine.
I feel bad posting this bc I know my routine probably sucks...I've read up on skincare so so much but I just haven't had the money to try out lots of different products.
So let me know if you guys feel some type of way about either of those AHA products! Any information is appreciated!
submitted by hypersomni to SkincareAddiction [link] [comments]
I've been suffering from Adderall-induced acne for over a year now. My skin is very very congested, my pores fill up with sebum on the daily. My skin tone has become uneven with red marks, they fade eventually but it takes a while. I'm starting to get some minor acne scarring as well. The sebum bumps (closed comedones?) are mostly on my chin, sides of face, and forehead, especially between my eyebrows. Oftentimes they'll turn into angry whiteheads.
I have tried red box Stridex and it seemingly does nothing. My skin is very oily but dry at the same time, it feels horrendous and dull.
Currently, my routine is the same morning and night.
-Aveeno Oat Cleanser, rinse with water, use face towel to dry gently and exfoliate
-Cosrx snail mucin 96
-Cetaphil Soothing Aloe Gel Cream
I try to do Stridex like every other night after cleansing and let it sit for 15 minutes. I feel tingly like it's getting in my pores but I haven't noticed it ever doing anything....
I've been using that cleanser and moisturizer bc I had the idea in my head that my skin doesn't like fatty alcohols, but I don't even know if that's true. I'm almost out of both of them and I'm wanting to switch to Cerave Foaming Cleanser and Cerave Daily Moisturizer. I am also planning to incorporate the Biore UV aqua rich sunscreen into my routine.
I feel bad posting this bc I know my routine probably sucks...I've read up on skincare so so much but I just haven't had the money to try out lots of different products.
So let me know if you guys feel some type of way about either of those AHA products! Any information is appreciated!
2023.06.25 13:39 mzvolumbus I don’t know what’s wrong with me.
This is quite embarrassing but I am curious to find out what the f is wrong with me. I use to shower ever day and do my make up everyday now I won’t bathe for like 3 weeks straight. I’ll wash up and use deodorant, and perfume. I rarely ever do my hair or make up anymore. I wear big baggy clothes when before I used to wear dresses shorts really pretty Tops now I just wear long sleeves shirts and sweats everywhere and crocs. I was in a place where I could not for the life of me get out of bed or get off my couch. I couldn’t do simple things that were easy like sweeping the kitchen floor, or cleaning my bathroom or taking out the trash everything seemed like it was impossible for me to do And I wouldn’t go out the house. I felt confined to a bed or couch. Sometimes I wouldn’t even take my own medication because I didn’t even want to get up so I just said screw it and I didn’t understand how I went from being up and actively walking around and doing things for myself to being afraid to leave my house and unable to care for myself and getting to the point where I had to pay people to clean my house and have someone deliver my food and help take care of care of me. I am 30 by the way so it’s not like i am 80. It got so bad I was literally to the point of shooting my self. Then a miracle happened 3 Months of the pharmacy not having my Adderall they we’re finally able to fill it and as soon as I took my dose I was up cleansing, organizing, leaving my house for hours, going to different places and not having extremely anxiety it felt like I was a brand new person. Is it possible that my ADHD was so severe and going so long with out the meds I was suffering miserable and didn’t know the cause? I actually shaved and it’s been months like it’s a big deal for me because I use to have no energy to do anything, I would procrastinate, I couldn’t stay focused, I would have panic attacks, intrusive thoughts, racing thoughts, I was just miserable.
submitted by mzvolumbus to mentalhealth [link] [comments]
2023.06.16 07:16 cbc0531 i’ve tried (almost) everything
i was first put into treatment when i was 4 years old. i just turned 20. i still haven’t gotten better. my mom said that when i was 9 i had a few months where i was less symptomatic, and again when i was 18, but i’ve never experienced anything close to recovery. i’ve tried everything:
medications - zoloft - lamictal - trazodone - seroquel - adderall - intranasal esketamine - TMS - birth control
therapies - play therapy (as a child) - exposure therapy (for specific phobia) - cbt - dbt - talk therapy - family therapy - inpatient, partial hospitalization, iop
habits - going to the gym regularly - eating a balanced diet - meditation - positive affirmations - light therapy - sleep hygiene - limiting time on social media
lifestyle changes - gap year between high school and college (traveled and worked) - worked on a farm on oahu - 3-day wifi cleanse
my dad’s 50, and he’s been depressed and suicidal his whole life. i’m scared that’s what’s gonna happen to me. from an objective, statistical standpoint, i don’t think it’s realistic for my life to ever be bearable.
after 16 years of treatment, i think it’s time to just accept it. i posted this whole laundry list of treatment because i feel like i just need someone else to see it - i’ve tried almost everything, and i haven’t even started to get better.
submitted by cbc0531 to depression [link] [comments]
medications - zoloft - lamictal - trazodone - seroquel - adderall - intranasal esketamine - TMS - birth control
therapies - play therapy (as a child) - exposure therapy (for specific phobia) - cbt - dbt - talk therapy - family therapy - inpatient, partial hospitalization, iop
habits - going to the gym regularly - eating a balanced diet - meditation - positive affirmations - light therapy - sleep hygiene - limiting time on social media
lifestyle changes - gap year between high school and college (traveled and worked) - worked on a farm on oahu - 3-day wifi cleanse
my dad’s 50, and he’s been depressed and suicidal his whole life. i’m scared that’s what’s gonna happen to me. from an objective, statistical standpoint, i don’t think it’s realistic for my life to ever be bearable.
after 16 years of treatment, i think it’s time to just accept it. i posted this whole laundry list of treatment because i feel like i just need someone else to see it - i’ve tried almost everything, and i haven’t even started to get better.
2023.05.11 20:51 Slut_Spoiler It Takes Tinfoil to Make Tendies Part 1: $ECL 💧 + 💻
 | Sup Sluts, submitted by Slut_Spoiler to wallstreetbets [link] [comments] I'll put the TL;DR in the beginning so you don't have to tire your scroll wheel finger. You'll need the strength for masturbating to the gain porn: 0. TLDRA company called ECOLabs ($ECL) is going to go up. 🚀💰📈. I believe their semiconductor sector speculation isn't priced in, and neither is their public works projects. Bill Gates is invested. Table of Contents:
1. IntroWelcome to the "It Takes Tinfoil to Make Tendies" series. A collection of speculative plays based on research and varying levels of speculation that I am presenting. I believe America is making some wild power plays to maintain dominance for the next century. I wanted to write it all at once, but it started getting so out of hand I had to cut it down to smaller parts. This one is specifically about $ECL. I'm not an expert, but I do like low-risk high reward plays, and I am a patient hunter. I am offering this DD so that people can ride into the future on something more solid going into a rough seas market while they can gamble lotto tickets on other shit.I've been grinding my gears looking for a way to take advantage of the U.S. Chips Act ($280 Billion) and the Green Chips Act ($10 Billion), the E.U. Chips Act ($150 Billion), and the Korean Chips Act ($450 Billion). At this downward point in the market it is good to start setting a concrete base of solid long-term plays (2 years) instead of trying get rich quick plays like meme-coins and companies going bankrupt. "Millionaires are made in Recessions" as they say. So I started snooping and found this company, and began digging more and more. There are really two different angles here that I will discuss. The semi-conductor portion and the water treatment portion. The Trick Is To Let Them Cook 2. Water and ChipsThe massive amount of money being poured into the semi-conductor industry led to me the American Southwest where they are expanding and building two enormous top of the line facilities so that you can have your iPhones, and Chinese children can stay employed, and several other expansions. Intel, TSMC, NXPI, Samsung, and Texas Instruments (and more) are all striving to have American Chip Production and they have all chosen the second driest spot in America to do it. It Was There That I Started To Question About Water What strikes me as odd is the location of these new facilities despite the insatiable thirst of Chip Foundries. Making semi-conductors is a very thirsty task. To create an integrated circuit on a 30cm wafer, can require approximately 2,200 gallons of water; including 1,500 gallons of Ultra Pure Water (see below). So a large fabrication facility (Fab) that processes say, 40,000 wafers a month, can use up to 4.8 million gallons (18169976.6 Liters) of water per day. This equates to the annual water consumption of a city of 60,000 people (Gary, Indiana if people are thirsty). wow. numbers man... crazy. Well, let me show you in pictures how much water that is. If I could make this into a pop-up book, I would. FINA Olympic Sized Swimming Pool This Pool is 6.56Ft deep (2 meters) and it is regulation size. It holds about 660,000 US gallons. Which means, that for a large facility, you would need 7.3 of these fuckers full of water a day (copy and paste this image 7.3 times). In a tropical climate, such as Taiwan, droughts can bring production to a screeching halt. Global warming or whatever has hit a few times already and affected the great supply chain of TSMC. The new facilities being put in Arizona are enormous by the way. Pretty sure you'll be able to see it from space, and the Water Wars are already starting. I could probably find a library of articles about water shortages, but I'll let you do that. Hell, if you can find me an article saying water shortages are not going to happen I would be grateful. So, why do they need so much water? A semi-conductor is a miniaturized electronic circuit containing a multitude of transistors. Water is fundamental to the manufacture of semi-conductors because over a series of steps, semi-conductors are built in layers on silicon wafers into integrated circuits (also called microchips). After each one of several dozen layers of semiconductors are added to the silicon wafer, it must be rinsed, requiring massive amounts of water. But, it's not just water. It's Ultra Pure Water. Ultra Pure Water (UPW) is thousands of times purer than drinking water. Water so clean, that it is regarded as an industrial solvent. To make 1,000 gallons of UPW takes roughly 1,400 -1,600 gallons of municipal water. The standard for UPW was 2PPM (Parts Per Million), now, it's <0PPM, and as chips get smaller and more sensitive, the restrictions will be in the lower PPB. No solids, no biomes, no silica, no ionization, not even trapped O2 or CO2. From a chemistry standard, This water is so pure that it could wash the sin off of me in my college years. Impressive. So, what does it mean when "they use a lot of pure water". It doesn't mean they take this and throw it down the drain. There are some harsh chemicals used and flushing it would be a total waste. They recycle it. This is where Ecolabs comes in. Specifically, their offshoot group NALCO. Nalco is into water treatment, conservation, and automation. See where I am going with this? Brief bit of history is that Ecolabs bought Nalco back in December of 2011, Bill Gates became the largest shareholder in August 2011. I am sure this just lucky coincidence. Ecolabs paid 5.4 billion dollars at $38.80 per share. It has pretty much been forgotten about. If you look up $ECL description on RH it says (Slut_Spoiler Alert: it doesn't mention semiconductors): Ecolab, Inc. engages in the provision of products and services in the field of water, hygiene, and energy. It operates through the following segments: Global Industrial, Global Institutional & Specialty, Global Energy & Life Science, and Other. The Global Industrial segment consists of the water, food and beverage, paper, and downstream operating segments. It offers water treatment and process applications, and cleaning and sanitizing solutions to industrial customers within the manufacturing, food and beverage processing, transportation, chemical, primary metals and mining, power generation, pulp and paper, commercial laundry, global petroleum, and petrochemical industries. The Global Institutional & Specialty segment consists of the institutional, specialty and healthcare operating segments. It provides cleaning and sanitizing products to the foodservice, hospitality, lodging, healthcare, government, education, and retail industries. The Global Healthcare & Life Sciences segment includes the healthcare and life sciences operations. It provides cleaning and sanitizing products to the healthcare, personal care, and pharmaceutical industries. The Other segment includes Pest Elimination operations, which provide services to detect, eliminate and prevent pests, such as rodents and insects, CTG operations, which produce and sell colloidal silica, which is comprised of nano-sized particles of silica in water used for binding and polishing applications, and Textile Care operations, which provide products and services that manage the entire wash process through custom designed programs, premium products, dispensing equipment, water and energy management and reduction, and real time data management. The company was founded by Merritt J. Osborn in 1923 and is headquartered in St. Paul, MN. The listed name for ECL is Ecolab, IncHowever looking into NALCO...
50-60 Miles Covers Both Intel and TSMC Facilities and Data Centers I actually saw an earlier job description stating semi-conductor processing, but I didn't save it and it's gone now. Trust me bro. I saved the hyperlink though if you want to use the wayback machine. https://jobs.ecolab.com/job-not-found/?jobid=17553726. I think they want to keep the details "water-tight". This is not well known knowledge because ECL isn't ready for show-time yet. The Plants are still being built. If you are wondering about the "Data-Center" I'm sure they mean the Microsoft data center "US West 3" in Arizona. The future of NALCO is a ghost on the price of $ECL stock. This is a sneaky play that hasn't gotten into the revenue stream of ECL yet because these foundries are not online, but they will be soon. Very soon. When they do, I THINK the automation systems, chemical services, operations and maintenance, waste water treatment, carbon emissions, water monitoring, etc... will make $ECL chart move up. The best part is though, you don't need to read the financials to feel warm and fuzzy about investing into $ECL. Bill Gates has done it for you. 3. William Henry Gates IIII don't know about how you choose your plays or sleep at night not worrying about stocks. My sleep-aid of choice is alcohol, chamomile, and making sure someone smarter than me agrees with my thesis or plan. If you snoop around long enough into ECL, you will find a lot of work with Microsoft. This isn't a surprise as the largest share holder of ECL is Bill Gates himself. He first began buying in 2012; bought again in 2018, and again in August 2022. Billy knows a LOT about the semi-conductors industry cause he co-founded the company Microsoft, of Windows Vista™ fame. The same bill gates that wants to build a super city in Arizona and is investing in water thirsty nuclear power. Also, Gates Foundation Commitment to Water. Doesn't Mention the 50% in $MLNDA 🤔 Tinfoil Hat Zone level 3/5: I know I am getting a bit off topic, but I just thought I would give some insight into the big picture that I am feeling in my crystal balls (boating accident). Bill Gates is working on the greatest play on earth: bringing water to the desert. Just like Las Vegas. Just like LA orange groves. Taking a bunch of desert dirt cheap land, and terraforming it into a sustainable garden using the government to heavily subsidize the land with public/private works using global warming, energy scares, drought threats, the security threat of oversees chip manufacturing, and anything / anyone else he can use. It's the oldest trick in the book. Water infrastructure mean water, water means population, population means taxes, taxes means money for the government, government pays for more water infrastructure. He is essentially a Bond villian looking to transform America into his vision of the future. Luckily that means money moving in and out of publicly traded companies, and that means we can snag some. https://preview.redd.it/6pcexjsfz8za1.png?width=510&format=png&auto=webp&s=22085c48f4ab14d24613e8b39885b4891f9d54f0 The top land per state is:
That's 4 wet states, a desert state, and the state famous for corn and "Carhenge". I believe he intends to use this land to control the closest to natural pure water and therefore semi-conductors life blood. Does it sound like I am wearing a tin-foil hat suggesting that water would be shipped or trucked miles from where it originated? Is that something a crazy person would say? Is it? Well, let me just take a sip of this Fiji™ water bottle I bought at a gas station 18 miles off the freeway exit in Huron, CA. Awww much better. I can really taste the Fiji!I believe that Bill Gates intends to get a significant return on his investment, and that hasn't happened yet. Some say it's because of his devotion to fight for "global warming causes", though I'm not sure which side of the fight he is on. The major undeniable fact is that he has bought a shit ton of land through Cascade Investments in west phoenix where he plans on housing the smart graduates from the university of Texas, and any defecting Taiwanese engineers. Someone will need to mow their lawns, brew their coffee, educate their kids, clean the offices, etc... What he wants to do: Smart City of all the links I have running through this DD, this is the one you need to watch. I want a piece of that, and I know water conservation will be a big part. 4. The StockAt the end of the day, the last 4 transactions of Bill Gates have all been buys, with a cost basis of $172.25. Source: Ecolab (ECL) Insider Trading & Ownership. Last Buy was August of 2022.Currently, ECL is trading at $173.67. Wish it was cheaper. If you check out the WallStreetBets reddit talks, or the new discord, I have been saying it was a buy since $160 and verbally talking about why I am bullish. Something about having a lower cost basis than Bill Gates makes me feel smarter and therefore better than him, and you could have that opportunity too soon. You will see that on May 5th 2023 The CEO sold quite a bit of shares at $173.48. Probably for taxes. Probably... Possibly because a big dip coming next week with liquidity crunch warnings in the macro economic sphere, the old song and dance with the debt ceiling, the FOMC 5 bps raise correction, the bank contagion spreading, "in may go away" chestnut etc... In these times it's time to start looking at what is going to work out, what is safe, and think about selling that start-up venture capital company at a loss. https://preview.redd.it/576jmmyhz8za1.png?width=1657&format=png&auto=webp&s=86770f22973aa28b9dae9a183ab3f09f5ec020f7 You see a steep decline from late December to Febuary as supply chain crunches and lawsuits and recalls affected the company negatively, as well as higher costs affecting their profits. This has created the opportunity for buying it cheap. Resistance at $221 according to the chart. There is your sell. Here is there 2022 financial statement. Go ahead and look through it and read every page like I did (jk). 2022 annual report for ECL financialsI like this article too showing double digit growth despite the macrotrends. Something interesting and bearish that I found is they are being sued by a bankrupt company. NALCO is saying that the claims are without merit. Sales increased, of course. Growing demand for water control/automation and squeezing out every drop at peak performance will be rocketing in demand as water transitions from an abundant resource to a precious commodity in the next decade. 5. Water Treatment and SanitationThe other side the EcoLabs business is water treatment and sanitation. Their bread and butter. Soon, you will begin to notice just how many products say "EcoLabs" on them. Soap, detergent, disinfectant. Also municipalities for industrial water treatment etc... etc... It's always good to have a fallback steady revenue of products when you are expanding into a new-ish sector or high demand customer contracts. Basically, $ECL is a utility company, which rank #1 on the defensive stocks you want to own during a recession and yes they have dividends. Ask your boomer Grandpas for confirmation on this.As other countries begin industrializing such as India and Brazil, water treatment and sanitization will have a growing demand, and the Bill and Melinda gates foundation already has a foothold in these regions. There is also lobbying in select areas of America to take groundwater purification a step further. Currently, water is treated with traditional methods of chlorine, sunlight, flouride, reverse osmosis, etc. The municipality promises that every harmful bacteria is dead until it gets to your tap. After that it's free game. However, a growing concern in heavy populated areas is the presence of hormones, drugs, heavy metals, and fertilizer run off aka atrazine aka gay frogs. Things like birth control, steroids, adderall, prescription medication all go through your body and exit it down the drain and run off to the low grounds. There are lobbying groups trying to get cleaner groundwater and better waste treatment. It's all about the control and efficacy of water. Recently, chemical spills have been wreaking havoc across the country. The Carpet is Ohio Some people say the media is just now paying attention to how many chemical spills and explosions happen, others say it's increasing in frequency. Holy Shit. Just like Bill Gates had an investment in vaccines pre-covid, he has an investment in water treatment pre-train wrecks. Can you believe this guys luck?! The chemical spills and media attention may (will) be the start of a campaign of water treatment policies and water infrastructure, which is actually well overdue. 6. Further ReadingSome links I've saved:
These are the other EcoLab Companies and what they do and people should look into them. I think they deserver their own post by someone smarter than me:
Agrose is frequently used in molecular biology for the separation of large molecules, especially DNA, by electrophoresis. Agarose is an inherently soft material, so we use sophisticated emulsification and crosslinking technologies to increase rigidity.
Here is where I would post the tldr, but instead I will have to post a thanks for reading the whole thing. As for the plays, it's shares below Bills recent buys, and call options in summer. To prove this is a solid play, they options chain is relatively weak, and only go out to October. hoping for an announcement that these large chip manufacturers are partnering up with NALCO for water-based control. The play is pretty much as far out as you want it to be. by the time the stock reaches back up to 222 per share, it'll be a totally different company with the thirstiest industry relying on them and building a smart cities infrastructure. My positions: relatively small now as I swing traded it, but the xx shares I've kept have a low cost basis and I will be adding to this big before the next earnings report and getting calls in a few months. This market fucking sucks and I miss JPOW's money hose so I am playing it safe until at least the banks figure their shit out. "But that won't make me rich!" ya, well, it won't make you broke either and you could have gotten in significantly lower if you heard me talk about it. Like I said recessions/ bear markets are when you go long into plays like this. Use your yolo's for betting on which company will fail, Ecolabs certainly Will (Gates) not. |
2023.04.03 23:00 Khiefz We snuck into an ASTRAL Banquet and THIS HAPPENED
 | The Banquet"these are authentic experiences that take place in the astral realm via bilocating and are recorded in the discord server - https://discord.gg/PkBHFKZEKg you yourself can have such experiences in the server as well. it is not hard to learn, it only takes dedication. we do half-projection/bilocation to be able to type and inhabit the astral realm simultaneously. with practice, bilocating transcends the immersion felt from fully leaving your body, rendering the full separation process useless" https://preview.redd.it/eejpvgsrgqra1.png?width=700&format=png&auto=webp&s=f45ad37b01d79fcd73df1f314b6c2df4c1f0fb13 MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:27 PM Alright @ Dyblord and now I'm not sure where this is StrangePersonOfStrangeCity — Yesterday at 8:31 PM oh ya'll are sparring? alr, i'ma spectate MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:31 PM I was in HQ meditating in the dojo room I think and Dyblord had me meditate in astral Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:31 PM Don't get lost now MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:32 PM Alright why is it so far Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:32 PM Because it's moving MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:32 PM hm I see now Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:33 PM Oh yo got it And found your way to the heart Nice MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:33 PM I see and I think I landed on some kind of ground floating in clouds Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:34 PM Yeah Look around for angels MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:34 PM hm okay Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:35 PM Or dragons Deoending MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:35 PM right who is that guy? a 5'7 or so tall angel greeting me funny hah ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:38 PM Wait so we are supposed to be meditating to dyblord body which is his world? I think I am there I am back MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:38 PM Alright Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:38 PM You are here now MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:39 PM is this place a Shogonate or something Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:39 PM Something like it MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:39 PM @ ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ you can make ot by sitting infront of my astral body, my eyes might be glowing @ Dyblord and I'm up the stairs so it's a pretty place, I been to many magnific places before but this is good whu and there goes Kazutora my sword transforming into his dragon form Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:41 PM Introduce him to saphira MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:41 PM oh Saphira? alright there, a white belly but blue scaled dragon? this place is like a meeting hall Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:42 PM You're invited to the wedding feast MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:43 PM many magnificently budha like statues sitting symbolizing beings alright ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:52 PM Brb ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:52 PM Alright I’m there Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:52 PM Almost knocked me down with your entrance Lol ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:53 PM My bad 😭 MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:53 PM lmao ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:53 PM I just entered right now MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:53 PM I'm moving away from the crowd a bit ah hey there they've got some sort of silver cups of wine here one guy just served me some so StrangePersonOfStrangeCity — Yesterday at 8:54 PM honestly I think brooks might asspull the tournament Khief did gain some invunrability nonsense tho MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:55 PM @ ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ if my figure seems a bit obscurred its cause Kazutora my dragon had been in his dragon form along my shoulders hovering there chinese dragon ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:56 PM You are like in a sitting position maybe like you are meditating or maybe it’s just me? @ MizukiSolLGC MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:56 PM Yeah I am Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:56 PM I am too MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:56 PM I decided to sit still after picking a spot is there a guy in white hair named Dabby or something? Hah you called me mizuki here @ Dyblord I haven't really made that name known well but it's fine ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:58 PM I noticed you with the new white outfit and I see your aura is glowing around you with your new outfit, I am sitting right next to you. Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:58 PM Find me MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 8:58 PM Yeah you see Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:59 PM Look for the eye ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:59 PM I spelled it wrong so I take that out I see you dyblord Dyblord — Yesterday at 8:59 PM Coming to the party keif? ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 8:59 PM Wait someone is in a form and they are infront of me and they appear to be in a red form with a furry long dragon tail MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:00 PM Mmm I swear when Dyblord says find me i imagine "Finnnd meee" in my head. Was funny. ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:00 PM yeah you come to the fest kheif ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:00 PMLmaoo 😭😭 MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:01 PM @ ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ Hey claire didn't you see that guy too with the red wood bead necklace on his head glowing like a gold halo was kind of like a monk Khief — Yesterday at 9:01 PM i came in cloaked i been here for a while now, seen like dyb on a higher like platoform but right beside mizuki, u guys chatting astrally kinda like sitting down by each other in a classroom kinda vibe and claire came up like directly across the hall looking at u guys kinda vibe while socializing with other people in between the hall, it seems to be a banquet, not a whooooole lot of ppl here, but there's a fair amount, the amount that would attend a private wedding on a cruise, like the amount of ppl u expect to be on the suite life of zack and cody but if only ppl who got privileages could join so reduced number MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:01 PM the guy's looks was a bit besmirked Khief — Yesterday at 9:01 PM @ StrangePersonOfStrangeCity ye he might not show gg StrangePersonOfStrangeCity — Yesterday at 9:02 PM maannn It's a shame I missed out on spars though I cannn one run now, I guess ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:02 PM I am still there, while y’all are in a meditating position My Physical interaction are distracting me MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:03 PM lmao ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:03 PM I didn’t get to see him yet MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:03 PM I think I threw you a piece of chocolate Ah the guy moved on to somewhere already past the room so Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:04 PM Lolol Someone's bout to start a fight MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:04 PM someone? ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:04 PM Me? Right MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:04 PM yea Khief — Yesterday at 9:04 PM claire energy got wild for a sec dyb looks like that kid in school that intigates the crowd "fight fight fight!" MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:05 PM irk ikr Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:05 PM Ahaha Khief — Yesterday at 9:05 PM mizukii see still sitting kinda poking a bit Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:05 PM I'm not the most well behaved at the party Khief — Yesterday at 9:05 PM lmao Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:05 PM They don't even know how I get in ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:06 PM So I see a long table infront of me and I see that mizuki is on the right side and I am sitting right next to him but I feel as if I am seeing right infront of everyone and we all are given these plates, with forks, silverware, napkins on the side and there was rose peddles being thrown and I see roses that are also on the side for the guests Khief — Yesterday at 9:06 PM dyb rn ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:06 PM 😭😭😭 Lmaoo MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:07 PM I'm closing my eyes and just chewing my blue sucker yeah ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:07 PM My energy was like that and and I screamed to see if the guests noticed me 😭 it does reminds me of a festival Image Image Khief — Yesterday at 9:08 PM tf goin on i see some pushing and shoving MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:08 PM what is it khief lmao Khief — Yesterday at 9:08 PM claire pushed someone or something and dyb is cheering her on ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:09 PM Wait hold up!! I am still there but my energy is also overwhelmed because of I keep of physical interactions She is calling me rn Khief — Yesterday at 9:09 PM i see like a man in a business suit that's who claire pushed ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:09 PM I can’t stay for long but I am still there sitting next to mizuki Brb Khief — Yesterday at 9:09 PM gg MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:09 PM Okay hm Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:09 PM Lol MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:09 PM here Khief want a sucker Khief — Yesterday at 9:10 PM sure Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:10 PM Got a dab pen MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:10 PM what's a dab pen? Khief — Yesterday at 9:10 PM gg reminds me of juuls MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:10 PM Ah they're from an old friend so I can't back up if they been tampered with or not so Khief — Yesterday at 9:11 PM claire went afk and is putting up less wil that man went and got bold lmao someone peg him but we prob should keep it diplomatic idek who's party this is MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:11 PM well Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:12 PM The dude is d.ead Khief — Yesterday at 9:12 PM gg MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:12 PM he passed out not dead but asleep now Khief — Yesterday at 9:12 PM nice MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:12 PM but yeah I'd sarcastically say he died there a moment lol Khief — Yesterday at 9:13 PM he most def got ko'd rip MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:13 PM there's a couple of old folk spirits here Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:13 PM the spirits here are ancient MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:14 PM they all have their own forms for animals, some Chinese and other's not Ah well said Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:14 PM They don't know how I find them And invite people to their parties Khief — Yesterday at 9:14 PM that's wild all the souls here are around the same age MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:15 PM The Kitsuneh here is a old man I see Khief — Yesterday at 9:15 PM hell yeah grandpa old MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:15 PM That's fine I see that a few kids were around it's like everyone's on vacation in this room Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:17 PM Aww Khief — Yesterday at 9:17 PM yeah these ppl chilling a woman spotted me for a sec i had to wipe her memory then recloak she was a super old woman ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:17 PM As I was busy with my grandma I saw the business man kicking me out of the way I saw the business man infront of me Khief — Yesterday at 9:17 PM gave me vibes of killua zoldyck's mom ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:18 PM I am back MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:18 PM maybe was a form of that Khief Khief — Yesterday at 9:18 PM ye someone taught that guy a lesson ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:18 PM My grandma is busy with getting her room arranged and she was calling me for help Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:18 PM I'm just sitting back and absorbing energies. MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:18 PM okay @ ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ Khief — Yesterday at 9:18 PM yeah her form most def would've looked something like that the vibe translated Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:19 PM Bababa MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:19 PM for a moment I focused chi in my thoughts and my fingers started to steam a little ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:19 PM He does reminds me of khief 😭😭 but I kept blocking him out of my way and using some type of fire, he kept pushing me as i was just overblowing my attacks using my sword, to push him away from me. MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:20 PM when I made a handsign with index and middke finger Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:20 PM My hands make all sorts of sign patterns MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:20 PM Hm right Khief — Yesterday at 9:20 PM dude i noticed that, i was surprised cuz he wears something similar to me he even had a business hat on ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:21 PM Exactly and he was pushing me out from the fest Khief — Yesterday at 9:21 PM i see u leaving meditation and coming back to it constantly Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:21 PM I'm going to try something Tell me what happens Khief — Yesterday at 9:22 PM ok Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:22 PM I'll be preoccupied for several moments MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:22 PM Yep @ Khief for brief seconds ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:22 PM And as he was pushing me out of the fest and I kept on attacking him and he was just attacking me back, for some reason he disappeared MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:23 PM I just gave my blue lolipop to my dragon hmm so much people around tho. Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:23 PM Huh Khief — Yesterday at 9:23 PM yeah someone folded him ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:23 PM I tried to use the dragon fire ability against him and then I attempt to pull out of dragon flame style to move him out of my way because he wasn’t doing much he was just pushing me away from the crowd, so I used some dragon to fly him out of my way to stop him. Khief — Yesterday at 9:24 PM yeah these some old ppl super ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:24 PM W for someone who did folded him, gg Khief — Yesterday at 9:24 PM ha it licked u or thanked u or something MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:24 PM @ Khief Maybe young oda Nobunaga's father's here Khief — Yesterday at 9:25 PM i see dyb u finished with that? lmao we can check miz MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:25 PM yeah probably Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:26 PM I am now Khief — Yesterday at 9:26 PM yeah when i sent that it looked like u were clearing what u did Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:26 PM Hmm Khief — Yesterday at 9:26 PM the way ppl are finishing a prayer but what i seen was u sent a signal or it was like energy or something coming from everyone in the room dude real quick ngl MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:27 PM Yeah I cheered a laugh Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:27 PM My presence there is like an amoeba of energy Khief — Yesterday at 9:27 PM this shit and esp all the events taking place and what did just dyb, it feels like this is the auction from Hxh Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:27 PM If you try you can sense it around you Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:27 PM Who wants to be a test subject for a new ability Khief — Yesterday at 9:27 PM but anyway, after that thing was coming up from the ppl, it was like a massive combination of all their energies as a unified source energy a massive pool you didn't seem to take this into yourself so to speak but u collected it near u Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:28 PM I'm trying to surround the entire room and utilize the pool Khief — Yesterday at 9:28 PM and around u playing with it sorta then u kinda seemed to cleanse the energy that u collected ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:28 PM Yeah there’s so many people who are sitting down for a feast and then there is others who was walking around and talking Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:28 PM I didn't want that energy Khief — Yesterday at 9:28 PM and then sent it back out MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:28 PM yeah Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:28 PM There were two different kinds ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:29 PM when I came back in everyone was super calm MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:29 PM mhm Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:29 PM They could all sense something happening Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:29 PM Like what ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:29 PM Is someone like nagging on my energy, or tapping on my shoulder Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:29 PM That’s me Khief — Yesterday at 9:29 PM yeah at first they all looked but it wasn't enough to errupt a reaction from them cuz they weren't like "fuck off" MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:30 PM I'm gonna take out a pipe real quick ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:30 PM Alright yeah!! Heyy I noticed you tapping on my shoulder Khief — Yesterday at 9:30 PM they almost seemed to lose awareness after a bit ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:30 PM I’m waving at you noxxie How y’all see my form Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:30 PM Hi It’s blue ish ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:31 PM As a women in a long hair or a women form with a dark outfit on and a dark skirt as well, Ahh I see When I noticed you typing on my energy I thought you was the guest Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:31 PM Yes I love doing that ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:31 PM I thought it was khief tapping me on the shoulder ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:31 PM Aha nice, I was waving back at you Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:31 PM I saw So who wants to help me test an ability real quick MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:32 PM I can't right now, I'm too busy with my dragon to relax tbh u/Noxxie the Storm Weaver ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:32 PM I thought it was one of the servant that was serving food, I see everyone and the guest is done with their food Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:32 PM Seriously it’s like 5 seconds The fight won’t last long ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:33 PM I couldn’t relax at first because I kept being called Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:33 PM If it works Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:33 PM Okay cmon ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:33 PM Oh geez, brb MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:33 PM Okay @ ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:33 PM I’m sending you calming energy to help you relax @ MizukiSolLGC Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:33 PM Yes im challenging you lmao MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:33 PM I still am tbh Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:34 PM Oh then relax lol at least I tried ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:34 PM Brb she is calling me again to help her with her room MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:35 PM I think I threw you a red pip with engraved silver at the end @ Noxxie the Storm Weaver lol Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:35 PM Lol ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:35 PM My energy is disturbed, my energy is not used to this, but it disturbed my energy. And now I have to relax Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:36 PM You knocked my attention clear away from the fight.n Nice. Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:36 PM Sorry I’ll stop ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:37 PM You are good, I feel like my energy didn’t knew what it was, it just reacted differently, and it was reacting it in a way as it was something else disturbing it Brb Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:38 PM Yes it’s a new ability Seriously if it hurt you that much I’ll stop. I didn’t expect it to be that stronk MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:39 PM hah Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:42 PM It was a light tap holy shit It did all that I’m scared ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:42 PM It wasn’t hurting me it was that I felt the affect as it was taking place, and my energy felt like it shifted. You are fine don’t worry, I didn’t knew it what it was at first! But I also noticed this guy but I thought I was sitting next to mizuki on my left and I close to them to the side, they have broad arms and musclar body, he had a outfit on with his arms showing out and he just looked me mysteriously StrangePersonOfStrangeCity — Yesterday at 9:43 PM mannn I wanna test out more styles I haven't had a groove in forever MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:43 PM @ ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ yep StrangePersonOfStrangeCity — Yesterday at 9:43 PM but ya'll are partying rn (fair) MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:44 PM did I eat something like a steak or was I imagining that one lol ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:44 PM To remove the awkwardness I slide them some wine as I was sharing it with them, with a soft smile and then the guest just pushed it out the way. Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:44 PM Lmao MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:44 PM they didn't want to feel like they were treated Claire Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:45 PM Claire if I went full force with that ability imagine what it could have done Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:45 PM Picky group this one. Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:45 PM I have stronger variants of it too Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:45 PM Should be Seeing as Hideyoshi is the guest of honor stellify — Yesterday at 9:45 PM Eh, different ages different customs MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:45 PM lmao that guy right I saw him too @ Dyblord Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:46 PM What did you guys see Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:46 PM See the dead, do ya? Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:46 PM Do I? MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:46 PM I haven't payed attention sorry lol @ Noxxie the Storm Weaver Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:46 PM Oh ok MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:46 PM me and my dragon talking in thoughts Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:46 PM Ahh Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:48 PM I got some kind of parasite from all the energy I sucked in Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:48 PM Ok I’ll remove it MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:48 PM lol yeah It'd be easy to clear Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:48 PM I think I got it Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:49 PM You got most of it Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:49 PM They are annoying Oh hold on Digging in There Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:49 PM Yeah it's going deep Nice Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:49 PM I’m also looking for other parasites Ahh the usual 50 billion of them Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:50 PM You'll find no shortage of you dig deep enoufh stellify — Yesterday at 9:50 PM Bored enough, is the route to this still open Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:50 PM Would you like them mostly removed? Ehh forget it idk if you trust me lmao stellify — Yesterday at 9:51 PM ? Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:51 PM Also it can have rebounds Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:52 PM @ stellify yea ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:52 PM For me if it was going to go that far, i would of say I didn’t want it, i know it was working but I have a feeling that is helpful who can take anything that feels any type a disturbance. but it doesn’t means it’s that’s destructive. stellify — Yesterday at 9:52 PM Aight, will see if I can pathfind Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:52 PM Ahh Sorry about that was excited tbh ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:53 PM So They don’t like being welcomed.. hmm MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:53 PM Well it's odd to put that way without sounding bad Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:53 PM What color is my aura guys smiles Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:53 PM I sense you stellify ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:53 PM I saw when the guy got up and threw the drink at me and yelling as if I was assaulting him. MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:54 PM not sure Noxxie ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:54 PM ahh I see, I think I might get revenge on the guest Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:54 PM You can’t see it? MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:54 PM Isn't it blue? Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:54 PM Lol Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:54 PM Blue to me. MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:54 PM it's funny to say Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:54 PM Ahh MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:55 PM hmmm this party sure is a great one for being lengthy, who's counting tho lol ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:55 PM I could hear him, it was like he shouted out that I assault him 🤷♀️ Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:56 PM Was it that guy I’m not naming names stellify — Yesterday at 9:56 PM Cool I'm in the right zone good ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:56 PM The party reminds me of this with a rows of long tables and next table to the next table, Theres tables prepared for a meal and everyone is sitting down and talking. Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:57 PM I seen that too but it's all made of blue light MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:57 PM hm yea ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:57 PM I found the guy with the outfit and showing off his muscle out I see him. stellify — Yesterday at 9:57 PM It is kinda crowded for me but I will manage ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 9:57 PM Time to beat his ass Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:58 PM Image MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 9:59 PM Image how I think I feel like atm Dyblord — Yesterday at 9:59 PM Bahaha Me too actually Lmao Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 9:59 PM Who? Oh Wtf My brain stellify — Yesterday at 10:02 PM Eyes on me already this is why I don't go out to stuff like this much Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:02 PM Ahaha Hiya there Look for the floating eye that watches you MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:02 PM I'm about to laugh there's small spirit like yokai Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:02 PM ^^ stellify — Yesterday at 10:02 PM Kind of rude to laugh Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:02 PM Aw but that just means someone's happy MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:03 PM It's fine they're enjoying it too stellify — Yesterday at 10:03 PM Laughing when someone's smaller I've only experienced as making fun of but if they're alright ig Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 10:03 PM Smol MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:04 PM there was a small guy wearing a black, brown style yukata with horns like 5 inches tall ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:05 PM So I went after the guy and then I was attacking him first hand, he wasn’t even attacking me back and he was just still, so kept stabbing him and I just strangled him and he wouldn’t leave. so suddenly I saw him disappear right infront of me MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:05 PM yukata, a kimono with a ribbon that ties it closed lordy Claire @ ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ maybe he was summoned tho tbh stellify — Yesterday at 10:06 PM Or hid Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:07 PM There's a great deal of deities here if you go quiet and listen Too many to name MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:07 PM yeah Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:07 PM They are like amoebas Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 10:07 PM Oh the? MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:07 PM Is there one I heard named Shigurath Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 10:08 PM Them. Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 10:08 PM Yep they my friends Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:08 PM Can you feel them in your brain? stellify — Yesterday at 10:08 PM Wonder if my matron is here lol, probably not though Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 10:08 PM Finally noticed them MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:08 PM meh @ Dyblord I been content Image ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:08 PM There’s a food fight going on MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:09 PM it is a small one though claire ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:09 PM It’s like at another table Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 10:09 PM Lmao ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:09 PM Yeah it’s chaotic I wanna join MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:09 PM oh boy stellify — Yesterday at 10:10 PM I am staying far away I'd rather stay clean Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:10 PM I see them fighting over a treasure chest Bahaha MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:11 PM Image stellify — Yesterday at 10:11 PM Hmm, someone's trying to breach my wards to sense me out rip them Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:11 PM That's ms Me ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:11 PM I am joining in anyways for the food fight Just throwing anything Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:11 PM You were doing magic and I wanted to know what MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:11 PM Alright clairez, you already got up lol Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 10:11 PM Heheh Spam food stellify — Yesterday at 10:12 PM Ah, just smth small ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:12 PM Now I kinda want to ruin their food fight lmaoo @ MizukiSolLGC I think I seen dyblord MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:12 PM Yeah I'm sure you could too ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:12 PM His form looks different MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:12 PM it is he might have white hair ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:13 PM Time to throw water at all them, ruin the fight for them 😭 stellify — Yesterday at 10:13 PM How much of me is even visible around the wards, I'm curious ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:13 PM Yeah I saw him and he is dressed up in a suit In a tuxedo outfit ^^ MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:14 PM well my dragon's chilling started to eat I would name him Kazu for short I just seen small group playing out a long shogi chess game they're taking forever lmao Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:17 PM I see your dragon MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:17 PM mhm Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:17 PM Try to focus on the others around you MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:17 PM some lady came by to tease him about a sushi he liked lol ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:18 PM I see, I remember sitting right next to you after I got into it with the business man and your dragon was flaming fire Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:18 PM Ifrit, yeah MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:18 PM I thought Ifrit's always busy he's been at his position of power for long while Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:19 PM He's always aleepinf Tell him to wake up He doesn't like it MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:19 PM xD ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:19 PM I feel sleepy right now Mizuki you see me? MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:19 PM Oh yeah I do Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:19 PM I don't like being woke up either but hey The dead wont let me sleep MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:20 PM you got a nice garb ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:21 PM When I joined the food fight, someone threw food at me back now I’m trying to throw water at their table Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:21 PM Amoebas everywhere MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:21 PM Hah Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:21 PM It's going to take me a month to fix it stellify — Yesterday at 10:21 PM Claire in all honesty a food fight involves food being thrown you knew what you were getting into lol ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:22 PM Yeah exactly^^^ they was throwing food at each other which is a food fight People at The table calm down but yet is messy MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:23 PM hm what a laxful meeting of people here and I never thought Hideyoshi would fit in but he did ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:27 PM There’s not too many people at the table but they have stopped maybe they made a agreement with each other MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:27 PM probably @ Dyblord this place makes me feel young ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:28 PM Maybe someone else had the treasure chest and they all left the food fight. No fun since the food fight is now over, I maybe should try to cause some chaos to another table Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:29 PM Lol Why do you wanna cause chaos in my brain? stellify — Yesterday at 10:30 PM I'm just tryna avoid too much attention, don't need problems ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:31 PM Maybe to add some spice to the fest MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:31 PM this is gonna last all night Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:31 PM Yeah dude MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:31 PM hope you guys don't have any studies tomorrow ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:31 PM I see some people are leaving and gathering food with each other MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:31 PM yea ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:32 PM all of sudden I feel a little sleepy MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:32 PM I know what will wake you up Claire Here it's a light beige wooden bottle with a glass cork ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:33 PM yeah I am interested to know Ahh thanks MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:34 PM It's got a engraving symble on it that's dark elvish royal seal ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:34 PM Yeah, after I am finished going to sleep that will wake me up Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:34 PM Lmao MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:34 PM @ Dyblord It is wine of course Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:34 PM Did you spike it with Adderall? ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:34 PM Some servants are cleaning up and getting the food together and someone is looking distressed because of the mess. wait.. hold on MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:34 PM nope ‘✦ ~ Claire -˚✨ — Yesterday at 10:35 PM I feel someone is behind me Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:35 PM They are always watching. MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:35 PM the wine I have is literally my small collection I just summon it here, too far to pick up by hand Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:36 PM Ready to go back into or meditation? We got distracted by the party Welcome back MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:37 PM so anyway I been fine here Dyblord Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:37 PM Me too Noxxie the Storm Weaver — Yesterday at 10:37 PM Image Dyblord — Yesterday at 10:38 PM Spooky MizukiSolLGC — Yesterday at 10:38 PM wow lol well because of all this astral we are into today I haven't had food yet just soda well stellify — Yesterday at 10:39 PM I think this is bout enough socializing for me lol prob leaving the party soon END OF CHAPTER |
2022.12.20 15:09 MakIkEenDonerMetKalf Went to an open mic by accident tonight
Back in town for xmas visiting the family and went for a walk into a bar playjng live music. This was in a hipster area in Melbourne's inner north
Host: Self admitted autistic lesbian (Nanette) who started crying and shilling her GoFundMe for mental health before introducing these acts:
I cannot see why people go to these willingly unless it's a form of personal therapy. Maybe I'm just some sort of sociopath without empathy, these seem popular.
submitted by MakIkEenDonerMetKalf to redscarepod [link] [comments]
Host: Self admitted autistic lesbian (Nanette) who started crying and shilling her GoFundMe for mental health before introducing these acts:
- Guy who was a band singer repeating his songs in spoken word
- Guy talking in poetry about his inner demons and mental illness
- Normie corporate girl boss doing poetry about how much she hates the patriarchy. Pretty pedestrian girls rule boys drool kind of stuff, weak.
- Guy talking in poetry about his inner demons and mental illness
- Guy talking in poetry about his inner demons and mental illness
- A girl who was sitting in a wheelchair in the crowd THE ENTIRE TIME stands up and does an Adderall inspired rant from 2019 (she said so herself)
- Guy talking in poetry about his inner demons and killing himself
I cannot see why people go to these willingly unless it's a form of personal therapy. Maybe I'm just some sort of sociopath without empathy, these seem popular.
2022.11.30 15:00 wannawritesometimes A Palace and a Poltergeist
[CW] Flash Fiction Challenge: A Palace and A Poltergeist
"Veronica, how–"
The maid ducks as a gold-framed painting flies overhead.
"–are you so unbothered! It's bad enough to–"
Cackling laughter echoes through the ballroom. Veronica shrugs.
"–clean up after spoiled kids, but this," June gestures around, "thing's constant chaos? I can't even sweep! I called a priest, but they laughed. I cleansed with sage, but that didn't do anything. I've had it!"
Veronica begins climbing the grand staircase. Nonchalantly, she hops over a vase as it tumbles down.
"Look," Veronica turns, instinctually dodging a small bust that soars toward the back of her head. "It's no worse than some of the kids I've dealt with before. A couple of them were not only spoiled beyond belief and lived off sugar, but their parents refused their prescrip–"
June turns and runs off, calling back over her shoulder, "I know what to do!"
Veronica shrugs, covers her ears as a screech resounds, then continues on her way.
--------------
In the foyer, June has the broom ready. Her apron pocket bulges. She lets the dustpan clatter to the floor, then loudly remarking about her own clumsiness, starts sweeping. Before long, the dust scatters away. She grins.
June drops the broom and yanks the items from her pocket. She drops a white pill into a mortar. Reaching into the pocket once again, she grabs a pestle and begins to smashing. Finally, she pulls out a lighter and puts the flame to the white powder. June waves the tiny blaze around trying to get the smoke into every corner.
The flames fade and June waits. Tentatively, she picks up the broom and makes a new pile of debris. It stays put!
June smiles. "Cleansing with sage, ha! I'm about to start spreading the word about cleansing with Adderall!"
submitted by wannawritesometimes to WannaWriteSometimes [link] [comments]
"Veronica, how–"
The maid ducks as a gold-framed painting flies overhead.
"–are you so unbothered! It's bad enough to–"
Cackling laughter echoes through the ballroom. Veronica shrugs.
"–clean up after spoiled kids, but this," June gestures around, "thing's constant chaos? I can't even sweep! I called a priest, but they laughed. I cleansed with sage, but that didn't do anything. I've had it!"
Veronica begins climbing the grand staircase. Nonchalantly, she hops over a vase as it tumbles down.
"Look," Veronica turns, instinctually dodging a small bust that soars toward the back of her head. "It's no worse than some of the kids I've dealt with before. A couple of them were not only spoiled beyond belief and lived off sugar, but their parents refused their prescrip–"
June turns and runs off, calling back over her shoulder, "I know what to do!"
Veronica shrugs, covers her ears as a screech resounds, then continues on her way.
--------------
In the foyer, June has the broom ready. Her apron pocket bulges. She lets the dustpan clatter to the floor, then loudly remarking about her own clumsiness, starts sweeping. Before long, the dust scatters away. She grins.
June drops the broom and yanks the items from her pocket. She drops a white pill into a mortar. Reaching into the pocket once again, she grabs a pestle and begins to smashing. Finally, she pulls out a lighter and puts the flame to the white powder. June waves the tiny blaze around trying to get the smoke into every corner.
The flames fade and June waits. Tentatively, she picks up the broom and makes a new pile of debris. It stays put!
June smiles. "Cleansing with sage, ha! I'm about to start spreading the word about cleansing with Adderall!"
2022.11.19 04:17 proto_indo_european Share your best goofin' off stories
Too many twitter reposts on here nowadays, I wanna hear the real, unfiltered redscarepod, so I have a particularly long, but silly one so I'll start:
edit: wrote this on like 80mg of adderall, didnt realize it was 1500 words lmao
As we were sipping our ice cold Budweisers in my hot tub, I was scrolling through a mildly racist russian meme app known as "iFunny", which CS and I had both been utilizing as our sole source of humor since 2014, while CS and LK engaged in deep philosophical debate about whether LK was 5'5 or 5'6 like he claimed. Mildly intoxicated, and sifting through a variety of neofascist gif captions and esoterica, I stumbled upon a work of pure comedy from my favorite iFunny account, MonarchTrump. I let out a hearty chortle to disrupt my comrades' discussion, and turned their attention to the comedic form I had just discovered. The post was an astounding success, CS and LK both let out boisterous laughs of approval, commending me on my selection. We were 3 Budweisers deep, at which point CS posed that we replicate the deeds of the post I just shared. Realizing the potential dopamine rush I'd experience upon such an act, I instantly agreed. LK chuckled and when realizing the total seriousness in my face, prudishly suggested that our plan was a bad idea. I called him a giant pussy and told him to drink another beer.
LK was clearly unnerved by our commitment to the plan, and so I urged him to indulge in some more Budweiser to calm his nerves. I also told him to stop being a pussy. We stopped at the Planned Parenthood, right at the border of the wastelands, and surveyed the region to ensure no vigilantes or 12 were about at this hour. CS asked if LK was ready to experience how God felt, and LK hesitantly mumbled in agreement. We drove past the old highway bridge, adulterated by age since its construction in the 50s, that marked the entrance to the Princedom of Poverty, and thus our hunt began.
We drove around for 10-15 minutes before we arrived at a decrepit section 8 housing complex (a quarter of the building is now rented out on AirBnB lol). We found our withered, yet stalwart target hunched beneath one of the trees lining the complex. He wore a raggedy coat likely stolen from the nearby Ross, his skin was ashy but durable, like the bark of a great pine, and his dark glossy eyes sat in the hollow sockets of his skull. CS looked over at me, I nodded in implicit agreement and chugged the last of my Budweiser, while LK sat in the back practically shitting himself at the point. We pulled up to the tree, and rolled down the windows.
Trembling, he graciously thanked me before I told him to shut the fuck up. CS let out a howling cackle from the BMW, LK, as expected, was gaunt in the face. I asked him if he knew why he was here, and he attempted to explain how he wandered over here before I once again told him to shut the fuck up. I clarified my question, and asked if he knew, metaphysically speaking, why he was in the state of homeless he was in. His demeanor became somber, and he admitted while it was due to drug problems, he had no idea as to why the world had placed him in this predicament. CS was red in the faced with laughter at this point, and I ushered him to drink the Budweiser and obliged, sipping gratuitously.
I posed my first premise: are people either evil or good, to which he agreed and sipped his Budweiser like a gluttonous sow. I then posed: Do good people receive good things, like prosperity, homefulness, etc? To which he agreed. Finally, I stated to him that according to the logic he just accepted, my friends and I drove the BMW because we were good people, and he, the homeless man, is necessarily an evil person, for evil people receive evil things. He solemnly nodded, and I gave him some gum I had in my pocket. I then asked him if people became good by fixing evil things, wrongs, in this world. He agreed. Moreover, I argued, people must become evil because they were wronged. Intrigued, he nodded his head in approval. I asked who wronged him, and let him explain some sob story about weed charges when he was 18, and the usual not being able to hold down a job, getting evicted by his landlord, yada yada yada. I asked him who wronged him, and that I wanted a specific person. I stared into his pitch-black pupils. He became visibly scared, his mind racing, and I could hear CS trying to muffle his guffawing, while LK watched in horror. After a few seconds, he blurted out that his landlord was the one wronged him.
I told the man, that tonight was his lucky night. I furnished the spare 9mm from my pocket in addition to the magazines we purchased and told him to put out his hands, and he hastily obliged. I placed the 9mm in the right and the magazine in the left. He asked why today was lucky. The combination of alcohol, dextroamphetamine, and adrenaline produced an overwhelming euphoria, like that of a martyr reaching the gates of St. Peter. I simply posed: tonight is the night he gets to right his wrongs. He was clearly on the verge of a breakdown, probably because of all the crack he used to smoke, and he blurted out asking who I was. I ignored him, and told him the only way he could cleanse himself of his corruption, was if he cleansed the world of those who corrupted him. He kept asking who I was, and I continued to ignore him.
CS and I laughed our asses off and relived the experience through the drive home. My being was warm with euphoria, like a deep transcendental hunger had been satiated. LK said nothing, so CS and I chided him to cheer up. We returned home at 4am and crashed in the upstairs living room. We never heard or saw the old man again. One day a week or two later I saw a news story about a police officer getting ambushed and killed by those section 8 houses. I like to think that our brave warrior was enacting god's will.
submitted by proto_indo_european to redscarepod [link] [comments]
edit: wrote this on like 80mg of adderall, didnt realize it was 1500 words lmao
Intro
It was a warm evening in the summer of '19, and my boys and I, who we'll refer to as CS and LK, were having a few cold brewskis in celebration of our recent high school graduation. For context, we live in the suburb of a medium-sized midwestern city, 15 minutes south of the wastelands (a ring outside the metro where all the poor and homeless people lived lol). CS and I lived in the wealthiest neighborhood of our suburb, while LK lived in a small apartment complex by our highschool. My father was the president of a local bank, CS' hailed from a family of lawyers and STEMcels, while LK' father worked in security. Despite our wealth disparities, our brotherhood was stronger than steel.As we were sipping our ice cold Budweisers in my hot tub, I was scrolling through a mildly racist russian meme app known as "iFunny", which CS and I had both been utilizing as our sole source of humor since 2014, while CS and LK engaged in deep philosophical debate about whether LK was 5'5 or 5'6 like he claimed. Mildly intoxicated, and sifting through a variety of neofascist gif captions and esoterica, I stumbled upon a work of pure comedy from my favorite iFunny account, MonarchTrump. I let out a hearty chortle to disrupt my comrades' discussion, and turned their attention to the comedic form I had just discovered. The post was an astounding success, CS and LK both let out boisterous laughs of approval, commending me on my selection. We were 3 Budweisers deep, at which point CS posed that we replicate the deeds of the post I just shared. Realizing the potential dopamine rush I'd experience upon such an act, I instantly agreed. LK chuckled and when realizing the total seriousness in my face, prudishly suggested that our plan was a bad idea. I called him a giant pussy and told him to drink another beer.
Rising Action
We hopped in CS' BMW 3 series and boozed and cruised our way down to the Academy Sports & Outdoors 7 minutes away from my abode. In the store CS and I put on our game faces and headed to the back of the store, while LK looked at joggers in the short and stout section. CS, armed with his father's AMEX platinum card, found the items we were looking for. We went to the front desk with our haul, and the cashier, knowing we lived in a red, permit-less carry state, could do nothing to stop our purchase of the two cheapest (2!) 9mms we could conceivably lie about acquiring. We checked out with our metaphorical brush and palette, while LK bought some athletic wear to avoid looking out of place, and we returned to the black beamer and set off on our quest.LK was clearly unnerved by our commitment to the plan, and so I urged him to indulge in some more Budweiser to calm his nerves. I also told him to stop being a pussy. We stopped at the Planned Parenthood, right at the border of the wastelands, and surveyed the region to ensure no vigilantes or 12 were about at this hour. CS asked if LK was ready to experience how God felt, and LK hesitantly mumbled in agreement. We drove past the old highway bridge, adulterated by age since its construction in the 50s, that marked the entrance to the Princedom of Poverty, and thus our hunt began.
We drove around for 10-15 minutes before we arrived at a decrepit section 8 housing complex (a quarter of the building is now rented out on AirBnB lol). We found our withered, yet stalwart target hunched beneath one of the trees lining the complex. He wore a raggedy coat likely stolen from the nearby Ross, his skin was ashy but durable, like the bark of a great pine, and his dark glossy eyes sat in the hollow sockets of his skull. CS looked over at me, I nodded in implicit agreement and chugged the last of my Budweiser, while LK sat in the back practically shitting himself at the point. We pulled up to the tree, and rolled down the windows.
Climax
Like a metalsmith about to craft his finest blade, I sheathed the instruments of our entertainment and exited the vehicle, the anticipation building behind my skull, and the rush of adrenaline filling my chest. Upon realizing our presence, he came to what remained of his wits and sat up, unknowing of what was to be. I calmly approached the man while slightly lifting my jacket to signal to him who had control. I sat down in front of him without saying a word and bestowed upon him a specially marked Budweiser, and asked if he wanted a drink.Trembling, he graciously thanked me before I told him to shut the fuck up. CS let out a howling cackle from the BMW, LK, as expected, was gaunt in the face. I asked him if he knew why he was here, and he attempted to explain how he wandered over here before I once again told him to shut the fuck up. I clarified my question, and asked if he knew, metaphysically speaking, why he was in the state of homeless he was in. His demeanor became somber, and he admitted while it was due to drug problems, he had no idea as to why the world had placed him in this predicament. CS was red in the faced with laughter at this point, and I ushered him to drink the Budweiser and obliged, sipping gratuitously.
I posed my first premise: are people either evil or good, to which he agreed and sipped his Budweiser like a gluttonous sow. I then posed: Do good people receive good things, like prosperity, homefulness, etc? To which he agreed. Finally, I stated to him that according to the logic he just accepted, my friends and I drove the BMW because we were good people, and he, the homeless man, is necessarily an evil person, for evil people receive evil things. He solemnly nodded, and I gave him some gum I had in my pocket. I then asked him if people became good by fixing evil things, wrongs, in this world. He agreed. Moreover, I argued, people must become evil because they were wronged. Intrigued, he nodded his head in approval. I asked who wronged him, and let him explain some sob story about weed charges when he was 18, and the usual not being able to hold down a job, getting evicted by his landlord, yada yada yada. I asked him who wronged him, and that I wanted a specific person. I stared into his pitch-black pupils. He became visibly scared, his mind racing, and I could hear CS trying to muffle his guffawing, while LK watched in horror. After a few seconds, he blurted out that his landlord was the one wronged him.
I told the man, that tonight was his lucky night. I furnished the spare 9mm from my pocket in addition to the magazines we purchased and told him to put out his hands, and he hastily obliged. I placed the 9mm in the right and the magazine in the left. He asked why today was lucky. The combination of alcohol, dextroamphetamine, and adrenaline produced an overwhelming euphoria, like that of a martyr reaching the gates of St. Peter. I simply posed: tonight is the night he gets to right his wrongs. He was clearly on the verge of a breakdown, probably because of all the crack he used to smoke, and he blurted out asking who I was. I ignored him, and told him the only way he could cleanse himself of his corruption, was if he cleansed the world of those who corrupted him. He kept asking who I was, and I continued to ignore him.
Falling Action
I unholstered my 9mm and walked to the trunk of the car to get a 6 pack of IPAs we brought, CS commended me for my efforts, LK was still looking at the man in horror. I returned to the old man, who was staring at the tools of righteousness I had bestowed upon him. To motivate his efforts, I gave him the IPAs, and told him that the righteousness of justice will shield him from all harms, and then read some bastardized version of that one Psalms verse, walking through the valley of death, something something, thy rod and staff protect me. The man was clearly distraught, but I bid him farewell, as I returned to the car and we drove off.CS and I laughed our asses off and relived the experience through the drive home. My being was warm with euphoria, like a deep transcendental hunger had been satiated. LK said nothing, so CS and I chided him to cheer up. We returned home at 4am and crashed in the upstairs living room. We never heard or saw the old man again. One day a week or two later I saw a news story about a police officer getting ambushed and killed by those section 8 houses. I like to think that our brave warrior was enacting god's will.