I '60F'raised my daughter '42F' as a single Mom. So, that means we have known each other for 42 years. When she was little I worked in a diner during the day, and I catered on weekends to make ends meet. I did have help from my parents thank god, or I don't know what I would have done. My uber intelligent daughter graduated high school with high marks and got accepted to our state's most elite university. I was able to work enough extra shifts to supplement her needs (books, groceries, movies, gas, etc.), but she did take loans and grants. She graduated college, has gone on to become an extremely popular third grade teacher and also married the district's school psychologist. She has also given birth to my two most precious grandchildren who I would literally die for. We have always been close. She was a model child, we rarely disagreed and my mother, she, and I were like three peas to a pod.
Fast forward to more recent events. After she finished her education, I decided to return to school and earn my bachelors and masters degree. I had left the catering business when my mother became chronically ill and spent the next eight years caring solely for her. My income was from her and school grants. A year ago my mother passed away. Since that time I have struggled to find work and I am still in school full-time, but now I have half the income and double the expenses because Mom and I split those. In short, I have really struggled to stay in my current place.
A couple of months ago, after receiving 3 job rejection emails in one day, I called my daughter to commiserate and when I was done, I said "I'm just not sure what I should do at this point". To which she said, "I don't know, but there is no place for you with me, so you need to figure it out." I was instantly shocked because I'm not sure that I meant for her to take me in, but okay let's explore what you mean by that, because surely push come to shove, she wouldn't let me be homeless. But, she reiterated, "you cannot come to my home regardless of your circumstances Mom, you need to figure it out."'
I hung up the phone on her because I felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest. I don't think that I was contemplating moving in with her, but the fact that she didn't care that I would live on the street was suffocating me. I would NEVER let a relative live on the street, not alone my mother. After calming down, I called her and said, I think we need to talk this out because my feelings are so hurt that I'm afraid it is going to really hurt our relationship. She said, "I've noticed that things are getting more challenging for you and I have been up front in warning you that I was not taking you in." Well, I must have missed that memo. In hindsight, she did ask me things like, "what are you going to do if things don't turn around?" and she did say while chuckling once, "if worse comes to worse, you aren't coming with me". I thought she was joking because it wasn't even what we were talking about at the time.
Upon hearing that she would see me in the streets, I started to make back-up plans knowing that she wasn't going to be a source of any temporary support for me. I contacted my sister, brother, and aunt who all were shocked because that is not how our family has ever operated. Of course all three said, come here. Of course all three have drawbacks like the distance it will put between me and my beloved grandchildren. Well, my sister who was livid and also close to my daughter, called my daughter (unbeknownst to me) out on her behavior. She asked her how on earth she could let her Mom be homeless, if it actually came to that. My daughter said, she won't be homeless, she has you guys. My sister said, yes, but then she won't be near the grandbabies. My daughter said, "well, sometimes sacrifices have to be made."
*side note: I am the ONLY grandparent in their lives as they (her psychologist husband and her), alienated his parents ten years ago and haven't spoken to ANY of his family since. The grandbabies do not know-nor have ever met a single person from his side.
Anyway, since the phone call with my sister, my daughter refuses to talk to me. I honestly have not made efforts to reach out to her much because when I do, she doesn't answer or has her husband answer my inquiries. I have been able to continue a relationship with the grands, but I have to go through the son-in-law to arrange it. My grandson is so attached to me because I was his primary care giver until kindergarten while his parents worked. I was already caring for Mom so it was no problem to care for him too. They did start giving me $300.00 a month starting the second or third year of watching him, which I appreciated. The point being, it will destroy him as much as me if I have to move to another state.
So, I have managed to stay in this apartment that I can't afford with school money, maxing out credit cards, refinancing my car, some gig work, and selling items on eBay. I am frantically putting out resumes etc. to try and stay close to the grandbabies. Yesterday was Mother's Day. I received a generic "happy mother's day" message in a group text and that was it. Not a boo the rest of the day. In our family Mother's Day, is huge. Brunch, flowers, cards, acknowledgment. I didn't even know the group text included me because the first name was not mine so I thought it was sent by someone on accident. I later texted her and said something to the effect of "although things are strange right now, I did want to wish you a Happy Mother's Day today and thank you for bringing my two precious grandbabies into the world". To which she replied, "i included you in a group text at 9 a.m. this morning, I'm sorry if you did not see it." Direct quote. I responded, "how personal, thank you. kiss the babies. hope you are all having a great day. enjoy the sunshine. Her response: nothing.
I'm not sure where to go from here. I am heartbroken. I want to return to the close relationship we had before, but I am also so disappointed in what has transpired. She knows that I am struggling financially, grieving my mother, scared, and basically alone. I get that none of that is her doing. I guess I just expected more compassion and grace from her. In any case, I am at a loss of how to fix this. I want reconciliation, but I also do not want to grovel for scraps of her attention. Looking for advice on whether or not I should keep trying or move on. Thank you.
****To update this post, it's after midnight here but I have spent this evening reading the Missing Missing Reasons, that was suggested to me and also reflecting on the constructive posts. After reading through all of it, I understood that my perception of her childhood, the situation we are in now, and the journey to getting here are most likely very different. I wanted to know her perception and how to move forward to healing. I decided to call her on the off chance that she would answer and surprisingly she did. I began by apologizing to her for overwhelming her with my issues and that I understood her need to have boundaries and that I would work on extricating myself from her orbit. I apologized if any of my actions came off to her as passive aggressive, I wasn't trying to except for my petty mother's day message, but that doesn't make it less inflammatory or hurtful, so I'm sorry. I asked her to tell me what I could do differently going forward to try and repair what has been done.
Her response: (I'm paraphrasing) Mom, to be honest. This has blown up to be much bigger than it needed to be. I am going through some stuff of my own. Stuff I'm not comfortable talking about right now, and stuff at work, stuff with the kids, and when you complained about the job rejections it was the straw that broke the camels back. I just blew up. I didn't feel like listening to one more person's complaints or whining and so I just blurted out fix it, you aren't coming here. She said, I mean that. You aren't coming here, but I could have said it in a more loving manner. I asked her if I had just ignored her telling me that in the past and she said, "yes and no". I've eluded to it, but I'm at fault too for not just slamming it on the table.
She went on to say that in reality this situation would have just been a call from her to me the next day to say hey sorry about my crappy mood, but in the interim her Aunt calls her and tells her what a horrible child she is and immediately her IDGAF shield is up and she's burrowed in now. She said, "I get that I could have been gentler in the delivery, but people need to mind their business, and you should have protected my position with her."
I asked her about her childhood and if she had trauma that I wasn't aware of and she said, "How can anyone escape childhood without trauma Mom? I lost a brother, I lost grandparents, I lost friends, nasty crap happens". I asked her if it was the void of a father and she laughed and said, she never once felt that void. She said she had her grandpa and uncles and they were the only male presence she needed. I asked her if she was happy in her childhood, and she said, with 100 percent certainty Mom, you gave me the best childhood. I will never complain about that. Now if we are talking later, then I will say that we have had some issues with healthy boundaries and although our family has always operated a certain way that we accept and are used to, my husband is not. I have to consider his feelings in all things and his feelings are that we need to have a healthy space between us. I would love for all of us to live in one big house like the Walton's, but he isn't wired like that and I have to respect his wishes first and foremost because he is my family.
I asked if she thought my grandparenting was overly intrusive or obsessive and she said "yes, and I love it, don't ever change that". "You can ease up on the parenting of me, but never the grandparenting of them". She went on to tell me how much her grandparents consistent presence impacted the positivity in her self esteem, and self image and she wanted the same for hers.
I asked about my returning to school and if that bothered her and felt like I was wasting my time and she said, "absolutely not!" "I'm so proud of you for doing that". "It was so far outside your comfort zone and you took a leap of faith, and I support you 100 percent." She said she thought it was a great idea and that's why she suggested it. I said, maybe I should have put gram in a home and just got a regular job. She said, Mom who knew grandma was going to be sick for so long? You are an awesome daughter, and gram was lucky to have the love and care you gave her. I am just saying up front that I don't think that is in my wheelhouse. I'm sorry, it isn't for me. I am sure glad it was in you because I would hate for gram to have gone to a home.
So, we have agreed to meet for lunch soon, not real soon. We agree to set and honor healthy boundaries and I am going to work on my own emotional attachment issues and step back from their orbit. I want to thank everyone who had strong, harsh, blunt, yet constructive criticism. I wouldn't have had the nerve to call or admit my mistakes without reflecting on your valid points of view, so thank you, so so much.
I was thinking of asking her to come on and repeat herself, but then I thought all of the naysayers on here will just accuse me of impersonating her, so what would be the point? Still, I want you to know that for those of you who wanted to twist my words, inject seedy innuendo, false narratives, and paint me as a complete degenerate, I still took your points of view into consideration too.
Peace to you all and thanks again. Goodnight, or good morning really.

Chapter 12
Lacy awoke in a hallway. It was similar to the hallway that she first awoke in. Only exception was that it was covered in blood. Bodies laid on the floor with multiple lacerations. Lacy was already standing up when she had first opened her eyes. She could hear grunting coming from the other side of the hallway. When Lacy moved her eyes to the end of the hallway she saw herself. Looking directly at her was Lacy. This one was covered in blood and was holding the axe that she had. Her eyes looked deranged. In an instant the other Lacy dashed towards the real Lacy. Without hesitation Lacy lifted the axe and dropped it directly onto the imposter's head. The body slumped to the floor and Lacy breathed a sigh of relief. But as she began to continue forward the thought of what she had just done hit her like a bullet. Looking down at your own body would make a sane person go mad. Lacy barely reacted. Turning around she noticed a new hole. She could continue going further. Lacy had no emotion as she stepped into the hole. The only thing on her mind being the voice that she last heard the Elk use. It was unlike no other voice. It was calm but menacing. Like it knew that Lacy could not win. She brushed the thought off and continued pushing forward. She had to face whatever else this place had in store for her. She had to.
Chapter 13
As Lacy stepped through the hole she noticed that she was no longer passing out. Instead she just appears in these new areas. This time she was in a house. The home was run down. It gave Lacy a sense of dread. Walking around the building Lacy looked at the furniture. It was furnished as a normal house. Like a place that a family would enjoy their time in. A sofa was facing a TV. On the screen was an episode of some children's show that Lacy had probably enjoyed when she was younger. Directly in front of the TV was a childrens chair. Looking at the living room gave Lacy a feeling of nostalgia that drowned out the despair of this awful place. “Hello, is anyone here?” Lacy asked but got no reply. Looking around the room Lacy saw a hallway that led into the kitchen. The paint on the walls were peeled off. Entering the room Lacy smelled the stench of death. Moving further in she saw a girl on the table. The body was almost completely decayed. Just as Lacy was about to inspect the body a loud crash erupted from the living room. Picking up the axe and holding it close to her chest Lacy walked through the hallway. In the living room the sofa was flipped upside down as well as the TV. A ghostly wail cried out and Lacy felt herself become cold. Continuing through the living room Lacy noticed a staircase that led up that she had not seen before. Clutching the axe in her hands Lacy walked towards the stairs. As Lacy approached the bottom the lights began to flicker. The steps creaked as she made her way towards the top. Each step she took made her feel colder. Her eyes met the top of the stairs. A ghostly figure appeared to walk across the doorway out of sight. Lacy felt her legs freeze at the sight. The thing she saw seemed to be transparent. Lacy knew what that meant. “How the hell do I kill a ghost?” Pushing up the stairs there was a hallway. Two doors on each side with one door at the very end. Continuing forward Lacy opened the first door on her right. Inside was the bedroom of someone older. The bed was made and aside from the cobwebs and dust everything was in order. As Lacy turned around to go through the other door, another crash could be heard. Lacy turned around to the furniture ripped to shreds. The bed was torn in half and the dresser was opened with all of the clothes spread on the floor. Another chill ran through Lacy's body. A quiet whisper entered Lacy’s ears. The words were spoken too fast to be made out. It was so quiet Lacy had to focus to hear it. Continuing forward Lacy opened the first door on the left. Inside was a bathroom. The bathroom was pristine. No dust or cobwebs. Just a white pristine bathroom. The shower curtains were closed. Lacy walked towards the curtains. The curtains shifted as if there was someone behind them. Lacy reached her hand towards the curtains. Another chill ran through her body as the whispers got slightly louder. Moving the curtains, the tub was empty. Lacy breathed a sigh of relief. As she turned around to face the door the room became a dark blood red. Lacy looked at the doorway and saw a girl. The child could not have been older than twelve. Lacy froze at the sight. The kids arm outreached and pointed towards the door at the end of the hallway.
Chapter 14
Just as fast as the kid appeared she disappeared. Lacy peaked her head out of the door and viewed the door at the end of the hallway slowly open. A red light emitted from the room. Lacy stepped towards the open door. The whispers that she had heard were getting louder the closer she got to the room. As she got closer the whispering became clearer. It was gibberish. Nothing that she heard was legible and it was loud enough for Lacy to understand. The door was fully opened by the time Lacy got to it. In the room was a red symbol on the ground surrounded by candles. The room was dark, only lit by the candles and the miniscule glow of the symbol. The image was hex. In the middle was a book. Walking towards the hex Lacy noticed a mirror. Looking into the mirror Lacy found the source of the whispering. Floating behind her with its hands on her soldiers was the ghost child. The boy's eyes were black and was whispering in her ear at an inconceivable speed. The image shocked Lacy. Turning around, the boy was not there. Looking back at the mirror Lacy could still see the child behind her. Looking back at the hex, Lacy saw the girl sitting in front of the book. As Lacy stepped closer to the book the whispering became louder. Sitting in front of the girl Lacy grabbed the book. The title of the book was Goodnight Moon. The little girl pointed to the book. Lacy opened it and began reading from the pages. “In the great green room, there was a telephone and a red balloon and a picture of a cow jumping over the moon.” As Lacy read the whispering became even louder. “And there were three little bears sitting on chairs. And two little kittens and a pair of mittens.” Lacy continued reading. Lacy turned her head around to the doorway to see a multitude of people in robes coming up the stairs. The people were making a haunting moan as they stepped towards the room. Lacy read more and more. “Good night moon, goodnight cow jumping over the moon. Good night light and the red balloon, goodnight bears, goodnight chairs.” The choir was getting closer to the door and the whispering was growing louder and louder. Lacy continued reading. Just as the choir got to the door. “Goodnight stars, goodnight air, goodnight noises everywhere.” As Lacy said the last words, the noises around her went quiet. Lacy looked up and the girl was gone. The choir was no longer at the doorway. And looking into the mirror the boy was no longer whispering into her ear. The entire house was silent. Lacy looked back at where the book was. In its place was another hole. Lacy looked at it with dead eyes. Knowing what was about to happen.
Chapter 15
Lacy awoke in a study. The room was undisturbed. In front of her was a desk, multiple insect and other animal taxidermies were spread throughout the room. On the desk was a plaque that read Professor Crawford- Biology Expert. Above the desk on the wall was a quote marked in blood. The words read “Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here”.
Lacy looked behind the desk and in it was a skeleton holding a bible and a gun in his hand. Lacy looked back at the desk and found another tape recorder. Lacy grabbed it fearing what she was about to hear. Pressing the button Lacy heard a familiar voice.
Day one:
Our explorers found a mysterious hole in the middle of Israel. The men decided to not interact with it and instead immediately report it. The Overseer immediately demanded that a base should be made around the anomaly. Preparation immediately began on the base but unfortunately a couple managed to get past security and decided to step into the hole. That couple was not seen again. The building was finally made and studies on the hole began. Originally studies were done externally. The scientist discovered that it had no gravitational force, radiation, or mass. It dumbfounded them because of its existence as a hole. Then the physical tests started. At first they just threw things into the hole. The objects would just bounce off.
Day:15
Today is the day that they decided to send in a test subject. Some guy that worked in human resources. They offered him a high paying job, not telling him the gravity of the situation. They had a rope tied to him but when he stepped through the rope burned off. The man was never seen again. Later in the day they sent another man this time with a video recorder. When the man stepped into the hole the recording stopped abruptly. The scientists were confused at the entire situation. The only thing that they could do was monitor the size of it to make sure it was not growing.
Day: 23
The Overseer has lost her mind. She started kidnapping people to put into the hole. At first it was criminals, then it moved on to the homeless, then they started putting innocent people into the hole. She claimed it was to just see if someone could escape it. I have to tell the police what is going on. The people must know what has happened to their loved ones.
Day: 24
Someone found out I was going to tell the authorities. The Overseer has ordered me to go into the hole. I'm bringing this tape recorder with me. I will survive whatever this is. I will tell the world the horrors of these people.
Lacy Put down the recorder. Tears began to flow down her eyes. She didn't know if the truth made her feel better or worse than when she didn't know. She now knew that her chances of escaping were little to none. Looking at the corpse on the ground she noticed another tape recorder. Grabbing it Lacy pressed play.
Day:
I don’t know how long it has been. I don’t want to keep going. Hole after hole I can not find my way out of this place. I steppin into a place that had a lodge. I heard voices mocking me. Telling me things that I didn’t want to believe. Then an Elk appeared. In its voice I heard something that sounded malevolent. It speaked of this place referring to the holes in itself. The being was demonic. I shot it and another hole appeared. I kept going. I don’t even remember how many holes I have been through. This room will be my last. My hope is gone. That is what the Elk wanted. That is why I can feel myself rotting away. I'm sorry to those I left behind. I have given up. Hell has won.
The tape recorder ended. Lacy looked at the corpse. Looking back to the door of the room Lacy saw another hole. Tears ran down Lacy’s cheek as she stepped through the hole. Hanging on to what little hope she had left.
Chapter 16
Lacy awoke in a familiar place. The hallways were dingy. The lights were flickering. Lacy’s face was burning as her heart rate increased. “Lacy” The voice made Lacy’s blood run cold. Looking into the darkness The Smiling Man stepped into the blinking lights. Lacy’s legs could not move. She was crying so hard her eyes hurt. The Smiling Man walked towards her. His eyes widened as his smile became wider revealing the blood stained teeth. Lacy tried to move. She remembered the words on the recorder. It won't end. Lacy did not move. She looked directly at The Smiling Man. Lacy closed her eyes accepting what little mercy this place offered. The Smiling Man ran towards her plunging his teeth into her neck. Lacy felt her life fading away. Remembering her father she let out a smile.
Epilogue
Lacy awoke. She had remembered dying. “Lacy”. The same voice rang through her ears. Lacy stood up. She was holding the same kitchen knife she found in the beginning of all of this. Lacy could feel her body run cold. “It won't end.” Lacy muttered these words over and over again. The Smiling Man entered the light. Lacy raised the knife. Covered in blood, Lacy repeated the words.
“It won't end.”

Good evening. I just got home from a fun day of a baby shower that turned into a cook out. Its been an action packed week with a rewarding weekend that I will NEVER forget, even if the lights only visited me one night but no graphs or imagery tonight. I have pondered the events of the last 10 days and as I look back, it was a dream come true. Not just seeing something I have always wanted to see in the AB, but meeting all of you, and sharing this experience. Building the foundations of a community here on Reddit where we can share, learn, discuss, and explore free from any restraint or encumbrance in an inclusive setting where there are only two rules. Respect one other along the lines of the golden rule, treat as you would like to be treated and no politics. Remember the sun gives light and warmth to all regardless of what party you are with or what church or place of worship you attend or dont attend. I will emulate that and I encourage you to as well.
With all of that being said, I took my own advice today, and I went about my day, kept my eyes on things, and had zero expectations. I wanted to see the lights tonight and I was with a group of people who would have loved to as well. It has not happened as of yet, and to be clear, while the chances are shrinking, but they are not dead, at least for those more northerly. I personally will not be staying up tonight, but would it surprise me if we had a brief stretch of more intense activity than we are seeing? Not at all, but at the same time we have to go back to the night of the X5.98 before any models had run. If you recall, I was concerned about the NW trajectory of the last CME owing to its location and LASCO coronagraphs, but I was swayed by the SWPC going G5 in their warning and the possibility of cannibalization. Gosh I wanted it to be true, but I just could not commit. I thought it would be more intense than it is but I never wavered in my uncertainty. Uncertainty can be a cop out, but truly I was uncertain and I tried to manage all of your expectations appropriately.
A spike or two cannot be ruled out and the Kp index forecast is elevated for the next several days, but I think we can all safely conclude that another Friday night is not in the cards here in the lower 48. Unfortunately alot of folks in Canada who would still be able to get a glimpse or two are dealing with wildfire smoke which not only makes viewing difficult, but makes breathing difficult. Here is hoping that gets better soon. If you decide to be a die hard tonight against the odds, I wish you luck, and you are not exactly crazy for trying, but the odds are long at this point. If there was a big CME in the pipe moving faster than the others, it would have likely been here by now but some fluctuation is expected at lower or even moderate levels for the next few days. All in all, I got some things right this week and I got some things wrong. The one thing I did not get wrong, is this stuff is difficult to predict, and the models struggled with timing and severity. I was impressed with DONKI Scorecard though, I think it is a heck of a tool. I love how it takes all of the models into consideration and will be consulting it always going forward. It was definitely the most accurate of the model systems in my view, but you may feel differently. This can get subjective and with so many readings from so many places, locations, levels, etc, its a data mess right now and I see the high end numbers quoted quite a bit but its important we wait for all of the data to be parsed and analyzed. I expect some revisions and we will see what it looks like when the smoke clears on this storm.
As far as any and all tools go, I will never hold them back from you. I am not here to gatekeep or play man behind the curtain. I have no degrees. I am a self proclaimed armchair analyst and while I take the moniker seriously and credibility is important to me as silly as that may sound, I want you to know that I am very much a student still. Several years ago, I was right where most of you are. My appetite for knowledge of all things has always been voracious and I have had various passions at times, but never one that I just had to share with somebody, anybody. My 9 year old loves this stuff, and I am working on my wife, but YOU are who shared my passion the most, and that is what it is all about to me. Sharing. Learning. Teaching. Growing. I feel good that I do not have to make any significant retractions or revisions and that I gave you the best advice I could and I am happy with the result. And you know what, even though there were no aurora overhead tonight at the get together I was at, it still ended up with the group marveling at the stars and objects in our sky, as we went through and identified each one and its characteristics. Saw a shooting star and starlink go by. My sister who lives in Tampa called me very excited and said that she saw a meteor overhead in the area around 830 EST. Like everyone, she is awed by beautiful and rare occurences, but is not what I would consider an enthusiast, but boy there sure was enthusiam in her voice when she called. I just smiled to myself, and thought about how grateful I am for how this all played out and I think we have set a pretty high bar here, but I will try my best to meet it for you each and every time. This sub is called SolarMax and that is our primary focus, but as my day 1's are aware, we get into alot more than just the sun. There are more spectacles yet to come this year, dare I say the chances exist for something just as special and just as rare, maybe more. Topic for another day.
I have just a few more housekeeping items to discuss and then I will be signing off for the night. I have alot to catch up on this week in my real job. I neglected it this past week with no regrets, but its time to pay the piper and get caught up. I do my best work back against the wall anyway and am no stranger to pressure. As a result though, I may not be as engaged or engaging, but I will keep you apprised. Whatever I know, you will know.
SHOULD I BE WORRIED?
No. Not just about the storm we had, but the next storm, or the mag field. I need to make something abundantly and unequivocally clear. We are in NO immediate danger, nor are we in danger in the forseeable future. We have new sunspots coming around and the growth curve on them may be ramping up. Again, I am excited. Its solar maximum. This is a natural process. Could a CE happen? NOAA just told you this weekend there is a 2 to 10% chance in the decades to come. You dont need me to tell you that its possible, but again, all manner of things are possible and COULD happen. You can't get yourself worked up about something that COULD happen, when there is no signs it is imminent. Look, there is some confusion about the mag field and its ramifications. Its a complicated topic, truly it is, but the concerns are not immediate. Our mag field has been weakening for over 150 years, yet here we are. You probably did not even know that, yet life has gone on still.
The other thing you need to take away from that is this other than its not an immediate concern you should suffer anxiety from, its a long term issue, just like climate, that is of course assuming that they are not sort of one in the same. If you are not losing sleep and fretting about our oceans literally trying to boil right now, then you are practicing some cognitive dissonance around the topic of existential dread. One fear is not greater than the other, and all fear is the enemy. We are just fine. We are safe. Our magnetic field does its job. It IS weakening, but its weakening slowly. Official estimates are at 5% per decade currently. That is not overnight. Its not next week. Its not even certain we should be concerned about it, there are two sides to the coin after all. For all of these reasons, you cannot get yourself worked up about it. Besides you know what else above all? Worrying your ass off about the world ending will not buy you a single minute more of time living your life and doing what you love with the people you love, so get busy living, or you'll stay busy dying from being eaten alive from stress and worry. Should you be prepared? Yes. Whether its a tornado, flood, EQ, war, hurricane, mega super duper extreme solar storm, its never a bad idea to have some supplies and most importantly a plan. This will calm you, and if you ever have to need it, youll be glad of it, and youll have something to anchor to when your anxiety and shock make it difficult to just get to the next moment. More than that, build a community, because in a really tough situation, a community gets through. Certainly some of you remember GoT. In the long night, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives. If you really are so worried about something so big and so totally out of your control, do that.
So people, take care of your mental health. If this stuff stresses you out, take a step back because it aint worth it. Can you imagine how silly the people on X who thought the world was ending this weekend feel right now? Most of them will never mention they were scared, or that they were panicking about nothing, they will never speak of it, and they will look for the next scare. I just hope they at least got to see the lights. Look, I will be real with you. When all of this started unfolding in earnest, and I knew the chances were there for a big storm, I posted my work in 2 places. Here and prepperintel. I met many of you from there. I posted it there because I respect the hell out of the suns power and I know that in the very very very rare event a CE or something of that nature unfolds, a few precious hours may mean everything. I am true to what I say. I do understand the risks, and I treat them appropriately, but I can only do so from a place of understanding and that takes time. Right now, what you NEED to know, is that we are safe, this was a great experience, the next sunspots may be more active, less active, the same as the departing regions, but there is a reason why the auroras have not dipped that far south in 20 years. So many things have to line up juuuust right for what we saw on Friday let alone a grid frying event. You would need a HUGE flare, and I do mean huge, no X5.98 or a twin peaked X1/M9 will suffice. Not only do you need a rediculously large flare, you need it to produce an earth directed CME, and while AR3664 seemingly did it at will, its not usually the case, but the times when its most likely to happen are during solar maximum. So many solar max have came and went and you never even knew it and you are still here on your tech.
I would like to think I know my stuff pretty well for an armchair expert, but I understand my limitations. There are people who are much more experienced, educated, and knowledgeable about the finer finer details and components of the space weather game that I am just barely beginning to grasp. Do you know that when I was first learning space weather that I used to get caught up in the same hype? I see that we had an X-Class flare, and Newsweek tells me that they can destroy powergrids, which is technically true, but damn if it doesnt leave out alot of nuance and fine details which are absolutely critical to understand in depth. So I get on Prepperintel and I make a post about it and I am ran off the damn sub because the people in there who knew more than I did knew it was nothing to be scared of. I was that person guys. If you felt that way this weekend, just know that I am you. But here we are, and now if I post something in there, those folks know its at least worth knowing about. Its a process. Its a complicated and nuanced topic, but its not inaccessible. I bet many of you had no idea that you could be a space weather observer like the folks at the alphabet agencies looking at the same data they do, but I hope you do now.
When I sat down to write this "small" update and goodnight, I did not expect to fill a page. I will tell you one thing about me. I have been called many many things in my life, but inarticulate is NOT one of them. I have more than a few video or YT live requests and maybe we get there eventually because I do think it will be cool and interactive. I may still cherish the written word but I am no dummy, I realize that is analog thinking in a digital world. However, here we are and I like the readers, because they are careful and considerate. They usually ave the attention span to get into complex subjects and are able to orchestrate exquisite theater of the mind.
This has been one of the most exciting and gratifying weeks of my life. I tried my best to keep up with the comments but I know I failed. Esp last night and today, I had to stop and smell the roses and its always family first in my world. Even if I had all day, I could not have kept up. These are human limitations of course, but I want you to know that I saw 99% of the comments, the posts, the messages, the pictures. I am deeply moved and I really appreciate everyone who took the time just to tell me their story, their experience, how this experience touched them, how they learned something new, how they werent scared anymore, who just appreciated the fact that Reddit now has a thriving dedicated solarmax community. I wish there was a way I could let you all know just exactly how much it all means, but these words will have to do. Thank you friends. We are only getting started. If you find yourself needing a fix though, check out the rest of the sub. Solarmax blew up this weekend, but we have been trying to get established for a bit and I say we, because it is not just me. Others have contributed, even when it was just a handful of people. I just can't say it enough, thank you thank you thank you. Every writer just wants someone to read their stuff. That is why they do it. If you can make a living at it, cool, but every writer started for free, and just wanted an audience, any audience, let alone one as awesome as you all.
And one final shoutout to Mrs AA for putting up with me absolutely glued to my phone, computer, and keyboard for the last 14 days and yes 14 days, because before AR3664 stole the show, lil ol AR3663 was trying so hard to make a name for itself, but just did not have the juice, but did depart with an X4.5 IIRC offhand. Solar max continues everyone, we got new sunspot groups to analyze, a few more mild impacts to come, and a ton of stuff to break down on the May 2024 Storms as well as the other topics I promised we would get into. We are only getting started and I look forward to sharing all of it with you.
For all of you who asked about whether you should chase your dream of astronomy or something space related, I have one final piece of advice this weekend. It does not matter if its space related, it just matters that you have a dream. If you have the ability and circumstance to chase or still chase your dream, you need to do it, whatever it is. The lucky(wise) people are not the ones who make millions on millions in a 80 hr work week where seeing their kids ball game is not even possible. The wise people are the ones who never work a day in their life because they love what they do and make a living that suits them and their family.
Good night everyone, and may you have clear skies.
AA

I (M27) have been dating a girl (F29) for over two months. I'm gonna call her Susan. She is the oldest sister of a friend of mine, we are neighbors and have been friends for over a year before we started dating. I know her family and get along with them and she gets along with mine too.
From the beginning I noticed that she had a fairly strong personality. Nothing that bothered me but sometimes I felt that she could be quite intense, added to the fact that she was not good at talking when something bothered her, so her attitude towards me at times I felt were almost passive agressive in her responses. I've always had this personality with which I attract women who tend to have quite strong or controlling personalities, it is something that I have been told before and although at first I denied it, I have realized that in reality it is something that happens to me quite often. It's often a characteristic that a couple of my ex-girlfriends have.
Two days ago we had a rather childish argument. I had my graduation from law school, I ended up spending the day with my family and I didn't want to get up early the next day to go with her to buy a birthday gift for her mother, which we could have done at any time of the day but she wanted to do it at 9am. The day after the discussion we were not able to meet to discuss this topic since my younger sister (F19), who has an allergy to nuts, had a very serious allergy attack after eating half of one cookie with peanuts by mistake.
I took her to the emergency room at night because she was having difficulty breathing. We had never been through a situation like this, so I was extremely worried and feared the worst. I spent the entire night in the waiting room, alone, without hearing much from my sister until I was able to go in to see her. During that entire time (from 8pm to 3am) Susan didn't show any kind of concern to me, she was extremely cold and distant texting me, she was even able to go to sleep without even saying goodbye or anything like that, while I spent the entire night in an emergency room alone in mid winter without knowing if my younger sister was gonna be hospitalized or not. Susan didn't said that she was angry or anything, but her responses were something along the lines of "Ok" "Alright" "Let me know" and only that. She didn't even called me to know what was the state of my sister or how I was doing with this situation. I thought that maybe I was overthinking this but if it was her sister having this issue I would've probably went to be with her or at least gave her any kind of support during the whole time through calls or texts.
When I got home around 5am I let her know that my sister was finally well but that I was extremely disappointed at her attitude towards the whole situation, that I felt a lack of empathy from her part and that she didn't even said goodnight or anything like that, she just went to sleep leaving me talking alone while I was having one really difficult night. Susan responded the next morning telling me that I was right, she was actually still mad at me and because of that she wasn't being communicative with me. That she should've been more worried about the whole situation and being able to separate both things, the argument that we had and this. She also added that she couldn't go back in time to make things right, that in the discussion we had the previous day I told her that since she was an adult she shouldn't be getting mad at such silly things like me wanting to sleep a little longer and that whole thing hurt her and I quote "Now that something happened to you, it matters how you felt about my attitude".
I don't know if the response helped at anything to be quite honest because that same night I went to her house and broke up with her. I felt like she didn't care about me, my family or anything. That her apology was really underwhelming and made me feel like she was being very immature again.
Now I'm questioning myself if I was a little too hard on Susan because my sister started to feel guilty about this whole situation (she noticed me kind of sad) and told me that I shouldn't have broken up because of her having this allergy episode. I told her that it wasn't like that and that if anything it was a good thing because it made me realize the type of person I was dating.
Last night I received a long text from Susan apologizing and asking me to give her another chance to work things up this time since she was really happy with me and never felt like this before. I don't know, there are some things that I can tolerate in a relationship but showing such a lack of empathy or carefulness at my younger sister hurted me a lot.
Thanks for reading and sorry for my english since it's not my first language.
EDIT: Obviously I wasn't expecting her to come to the emergency room and save my sister's life, but she admitted that she wasn't giving me any support out of still being angry at our discussion. Maybe I'm exaggerating but the inability to separate both things was a deal breaker to me.
Thanks again for your responses.

Lor’Vah had been sitting with Kah’Sin for a few minutes when the door-chime rang. They had just gotten back from lunch with ‘Ri, and were sitting together as they watched Teh’Lana playing a game on a datapad, while they listened to some [music](https://www.youtube.com/live/oN-IAwhSxGY?si=i_GByP5G5rOS1AJ5) from Earth that was quite soothing. It had been a few days of travel so far, as the human government didn’t want to make public knowledge of their teleportation technology just yet. And while she *did* wish to be able to walk on solid land again - the time on ‘Sanctuary’, as Kyle called it, not being quite enough time - she was happier being able to spend time with *both* of her daughters. ‘Ri had had to get back to work, so they didn’t know who this was, though only a couple people came to mind as to who could be visiting them.
Kah’Sin called out for the computer to open the comms, and they were confirmed in their first guess: it was Kyle, asking to speak with them. Considering that he’d waited *specifically* until he was sure that ‘Ri wouldn’t be there, they shared a knowing glance before Kah’Sin bid him enter. As soon as the door opened, Teh’Lana looked over, and smiled.
“Kyle!” She exclaimed excitedly; she had really taken a shine to him in the past few days, and she was pleased to see him treating her the way she might expect any big brother to.
“Hey, ‘Lana; what’cha doin?” he asked good-naturedly.
“I’m playin, *game*!”
“*Cool*,” he proclaimed, “Are you winnin’?”
“Uh’huh!” She was all smiles.
“*Alright*,” he encouraged her, “Well, I gotta talk to your Mama and Papa, okay?”
“Okay,” she replied happily; Kyle smiled, and reached down to lovingly stroke her hair as he passed, sitting down in the chair opposite them on the couch where they sat.
“Can I get you anything to drink?” she asked politely, to which Kyle shook his head.
“No, thank you,” he replied, “I’m good…” He trailed off for a moment, looking almost lost; they stayed quiet, allowing him to collect his thoughts.
“*Well*,” he began again, “As I’m sure you’ve noticed, ‘Ri and I have become pretty close…”
“We *have*,” Kah’Sin replied evenly, with a hint of humor to his voice, “And are we to presume that you’ve come to ask for our permission to ask our daughter to marry you?”
Kyle looked up with a bit more sharpness to his demeanor than what he’d shown so far.
“*No*,” he replied with slightly more force, before continuing, “I mean… Not that I don’t value your opinion, but when it comes to our relationship, I don’t believe it’s up to you to decide if she had the chance to choose for herself. Which isn’t to say that I honestly believe that she’d choose me over *y’all*, but I’m also not here for you to tell me whether I can or can’t ask her in the first place… *However*,” he continued, “What I *am* here to ask for is y’all’s *blessing*, which would mean the *wor*-,” he stopped himself with a thoughtful expression on his face, then continued, “... more than *all the worlds I currently own* to me.”
She looked at her husband, who looked at her steadily, almost emotionlessly; then he turned back to Kyle.
“*Good*,” he replied with a smile, watching Kyle deflate in relief and confusion, “Because my blessing *is* - in fact - something that I *can* give. I’ve never been too partial to those old customs: it’s not my place to give my daughter permission to be married, the same as it wasn’t *her* father’s right to tell me I couldn’t marry *his* daughter.” At this, Kah’Sin gave her a light squeeze, causing her to slap him playfully on the shoulder; her father hadn’t approved of their union, but she hadn’t cared about that, and had run away with Kah’Sin to elope.
“So long as you can make my daughter happy,” he continued, “Then I can get behind your union… *Now*,” he clapped his hands together, rubbing them excitedly, “I’m guessing that if you’ve come *this* far, that you’ve already gotten the tiara?”
Smiling almost conspiratorially, Kyle held his hands together, palms up - as they had seen *numerous* times by this point - and a small, flat, black box appeared in his hands. Balancing it on one hand, he used the other to open the lid, and she was so transfixed by what she saw, she actually forgot to breathe for a few wing-beats.
“Good *goddess*, man,” Kah’Sin managed to choke out, “Did you cut open the *void* to make this?”
He was right to exclaim as such, seeing as that’s literally what she appeared to be looking at: a tiara - *circlet*, really, but whether it connected all the way around or not, when it came to ‘engagement pieces’, for the women it was always referred to as ‘tiara’, for the men it was ‘circlet’ - that was made from the inky blackness of the void, complete with tiny stars twinkling in and out of existence, depending on the angle it was viewed from.
“*Yeah*,” Kyle replied in a good-natured, joking manner, “But lemme tell you: coaxing that big star so close to the surface was a *real* chore.”
“I can *imagine*,” Kah’Sin replied, to which they all had a small laugh; Kyle continued,
“It’s actually made from the skull plate of the first Texas dragon I killed; with the help of my team, of course,” they had seen the video, and simply nodded, “The black hole diamonds I got as a reward for returning the pendant,” they nodded once more, “And then I used the kath’loo’s Gift to turn it so black that it absorbs 100% of the light that hits it; I turned the bone behind the diamond dust - and the larger one in the center - silver to reflect the light, because they were barely visible with how much light was being absorbed by the background. Refraction can only go so far, it seems… So: what d’you think?”
She had noticed that his natural accent of ‘informal’ words tended to heighten when he was nervous, and for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out what he could be nervous about: with something like *this*, even the most homophobic of individuals would accept his marriage proposal with no hesitation. Forget the fact that this could *easily* buy an occupied planet, the sheer *beauty* alone would be enough to entrance any being who laid eyes on it; she had the vague notion that this is what the other races - except the insectoids, and the humans, it appeared - felt when looking at a drahk’mihn.
It was Kah’Sin who drove that point home,
“I think that if she doesn’t marry you, that *we* would be *happy* to.”
She laughed lightly, playfully pushing his shoulder; polygamy wasn’t uncommon in drahk’mihn culture, but neither of them had ever expressed an interest in it before. He smiled at her, then looked back at Kyle.
“I think you’ve outdone the greatest artists of *any* species, Kyle, and I think she’ll love it.”
“I second that,” she added in; at that moment, Teh’Lana came around the side of Kyle’s chair.
“*Oooohhhh*,” she said in an awestruck voice, looking at the tiara, “*Pretty!*”
“I know,” Kyle replied, smiling, “It’s for your sister, but it’s a surprise, so we gotta keep it a secret. *Shh*.” He put his finger to his lips as he made the ‘shushing’ noise, a motion that Teh’Lana copied, laughing a little afterwards.
Kyle showed them how the sides unclasped in order to be able to wrap around her horns, and informed them that he planned on asking her when they had reached the station. After sitting and talking for a while, he took his leave - not before Teh’Lana insisted on giving him a hug, of course - and they were left alone to discuss this new development in their lives.

Just as Kyle was about to push the button to announce his presence, a voice came out over the speaker,
“Come in, Kyle.”
He was only surprised for about a second, before smiling, realizing that he shouldn’t be; he stuck out his tongue at the camera over the door controls, then motioned for the door to open.
“You can use him to tell you when someone’s at the door,” he said to the Captain as said door closed behind him, “But you won’t have him *open* it for me?”
“Well,” she replied as she sat in her chair behind her desk, looking up from a monitor in front of her, “He’s not a *servant*; he told me you were there, I didn’t *ask* him to.”
Golden usually kept his drahk’mihn body in a series of internal passageways, so that he could transport it wherever he needed to at a moment’s notice; these he had installed himself just recently, tapping into the nanoforges on the ship to reconfigure his internals. His body currently wasn’t in the room, but in the body or not, he still had access to the ship’s security systems; along with every *other* system, as well, of course.
“So,” the Captain began, turning the monitor off, “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“*Well*,” he began, taking the seat across from her, “So, I’ve been *thinking*, and - *all by myself*, with *no* outside influence - I’ve decided that on planets with a pre-rating of ‘8’ or higher, then I should bring extra security personnel with me. I’m sure only *one* person would be needed…”
She smiled knowingly.
“Come up with this idea all on your own, huh?” she asked, a sly note in her voice.
“*Oh yeah*,” he replied, smiling, “All by myself; no other help required…”
Her smile widened, and she leaned back, lacing her fingers together.
“Well,” she replied easily, “*You’re* the boss; got any candidates in mind?”
His own smile widened as he said,
“*Well*, I was thinking of talking about it with ‘Ri, see if she wants to take the job; I *will* - of course - approve her pay raise from ship-based officer, to planet-based.”
“*Of course*,” she replied with a smile, “Is there anything else I should be apprised of?”
He thought for a moment, then something came to him.
“Yeah, we’re gonna make a change in our sh’edule; I was gonna tell you once we reached the station, but now’s as good a time as any. I found a planet in the files that Kai’Ren got at a private auction between exploration company owners: the Federation auctions off the rights to First Contact with species that the probes discover, and this planet has *two*. Kai’Ren spent up pretty much all the money he had to buy it - which is probably why he tried stealing those systems from me - but he was apparently trying to gather up the money to be able to send a team in with full hazmat gear, considering that the viral/bacterial aggression is at a Level 11. Me, ‘Ri, ‘n Cheshire’ll be fine as we are, but the rest of the team will need an upgrade to their immune systems if they wanna come with us. They can get that done in the med bay; I don’t trust my control over the kath’loo’s Gift enough to be able to perfectly alter someone else’s biology like that.”
She nodded in understanding, then spoke up,
“Sounds like a plan; what information do we have on the sapient species?”
So he took the time to detail out everything he’d learned about the two races that shared the planet, but never interacted with each other because of their biologies. One was a serpentine race that - obviously - couldn’t withstand the colder temperatures of the planet’s winters; which lasted for an entire Earth year, from fall through winter, and another year for the warmer seasons.
The other race was another large primate, and they lived up in the mountains until the winter ‘months’, when they were able to migrate down, and replenish their stocks of herd animals. These were actually more advanced than the serpentine race, as there were pictures of their villages being lit up at nights with what was clearly not ‘natural’ light. The probe had needed to go out to the ocean to enter the atmosphere to not risk being noticed by the inhabitants, doing a scan on the microbial life of the planet.
After they were finished, it was about time for him to go catch dinner with ‘Ri and her family, so he bid the Captain goodnight, and left her office. The rest of the night passed smoothly, and all that was left was for them to enjoy the rest of the trip back to the station.

Par’Lo was an old sehr’chtahb, the once-black rings around his eyes now a dull gray, while the fur on his body was pretty much all white. There was no real use for his Gift to mold metal and other minerals to his will in owning a run-down old bar in a backwaters space station that could more accurately be described as a ‘hideout’ on most days. Not that any criminal outfit actually *ran* this place, but everyone here knew to keep their heads down, and mouths shut. Business owners like himself relied on the service of anyone who came their way - having their *own* reasons to be skirting the center of the Federation, as it were - so discretion was a virtue in keeping a business running. He was just lucky enough to have been able to acquire this bar: it wasn’t much, but it was the only one around for weeks in subspace.
They *did* still receive transmissions from the Federation this far out - they weren’t an *actual* crime center, so they weren’t really *trying* to stay off the Federations ‘radar’ - so he had a screen playing in the corner of the bar for a break in the monotony. As he was pouring another drink to a vell’prah at the bar, a special broadcast came across the screen, drawing the attention of everyone nearby.
It appeared to be a message from the suun’mahs, the subject of which being the newest species introduced to the Federation, these ‘humans’ that they were sponsoring in their Uplifting. Humans - it appeared - were relatively close to gaining FTL capabilities, so their process was shorter than most others in the Federation. The suun’mahs scientists had been there every step of the way, making sure the humans understood each new concept, and how to apply it to their everyday lives before moving on to the next, more complicated subject.
The suun’mahs representative then announced that there was a special message that the humans had sent out, more than *500* of their years prior. And it was quite the message, indeed; it was over a Standard hour by itself, though the gravity of it made the time seem to pass by mostly unnoticed. It wasn’t much, by the standards of what might be sent during diplomatic exchanges, except that it had been created long before digital media existed in any reliable capacity; so they had transcribed it on a golden disk, using the technology they possessed at the time to encode their message, for all to see.
They saw pictures of humans, from all walks of life, doing all manner of activities. They heard the sounds of nature, animals and seismic events, storms and the gentle breeze in the grass. They saw - and heard a translated reading of - a message of text sent out with the images and sounds, a message of hope and good will, extending a hand of friendship to galactic neighbors they had no proof even existed, in the *hopes* that they weren’t hostile. And yet they had risked that, in order to confirm that they weren’t alone in the universe.
This was followed by a quick montage of Ambassador Redding’s exploits in the Federation, so far. It showed him meeting his team his first day on the ship, and of him finding the miu’alfar being harrassed, saving her from her attackers, and scaring them easily. It showed him almost being impaled by a gal’guin who could apparently hurl insults at someone about their race, but couldn’t take even a single one aimed at his own. As the human on the screen spun around with a resounding crunching noise, he heard a slight chuckle from the gal’guin sitting at the bar; he looked over with a surprised look on his face.
The gal’guin simply twitched his antenna in a way that he knew to be the equivalent to a shrug in other species, nonchalantly saying,
“I’ve never heard that one before,” he replied, obviously referencing the human insulting his species for *having* a Gift, “Rather impressive, actually; especially considering the *source*.” He gave a conceding shrug, and turned back to the monitor just in time to see the suun’mahs come back on screen, a solemn expression on his face.
“We have to inform you at this moment that we are coming to some rather… *sensitive* material, and if you have young children in the room - or for those with a sensitive constitution - we are putting up a timer on-screen depicting the length of the following series of clips, which will be translated into your local time measurement. The graphic material will - of course - be censored, however it is *still* shocking to witness, even as is. Viewer discretion is advised.”
And with that, it cut to a shot of the human Ambassador, but obviously *before* he became the ambassador. He was in a cage with a large feline to one side of him, and a large canine to another. Over the length of the montage, it was evident that he was ‘taming’ the creatures - the cervine creature to the other remaining side seemed too skittish to get near the predators - to the point that each would eventually walk over to the spot where their cages interacted with his, him being in the corner of his own, stroking and scratching both at the same time in a manner that seemed just as relaxing to the human as it would most definitely be for any creature underneath those dexterous fingers. Sure, there were clips interspersed of the mahn’ewe doing their experiments, taking excessive amounts of biomatter from him, but the focus was obviously on his relationship with the animals, and how obviously natural it was for his kind.
Which made it all the more worse when the part he knew in the back of his mind *must* come finally did; many of the animals had been disappearing from the cages around him along the montage, and it was obvious what the mahn’ewe were doing. But one day they came to take *both* of the animals he had bonded with, and his rage at the fact was a sight to behold. He didn’t seem to notice the pain as he threw himself into the bars, screaming insults at the mahn’ewe, all of whom simply laughed at him as they took the animals out. And then it was the slow wait for them to expire, getting more and more sickly by the clip, with the human becoming equally distraught apace of their sickness.
Then came the day when they died, the canine first, and then the feline, while he slept; though, he seemed to notice immediately as soon as his body showed signs of waking up. At the laughter of the mahn’ewe, he leapt up in a fury that made his previous outburst look like a child’s temper tantrum, devolving to the point that he wasn’t even speaking actual words, just deranged screaming of a wounded animal that was scared and angry, knowing it was facing its death. Then one of the mahn’ewe made the mistake of thinking the human wasn’t paying attention, and went to poke him in the side with one of the long poles they were all carrying; at which point the human latched onto it faster than the eye could see, pulling the mahn’ewe into the bars, and impaling one of the ones in the canine’s cage, the blunt end piercing straight through the small alien like it was sharpened to a fine point.
It wasn’t that that made the mahn’ewe stop laughing, nor the obvious sounds of bones shattering under the larger primate’s vice-like grip; it was when there were obviously no more bones to break in the smaller alien’s neck, and he tore it completely off of its shoulders. The shoulders up were heavily blurred out a couple seconds before the actual act happened - along with the sound being completely cut - but it was obvious what had happened; especially when he threw the pieces of the body at the remaining mahn’ewe before him. Finally silenced - and obviously fearful - they actually flinched when he launched himself at the bars again; they hurriedly retrieved all the bodies, and got the hells out of the hold.
This was confirmed by the suun’mahs to be what led the mahn’ewe to rank them as a Class 12 aggressor species, and to be confirmed by the humans as being, quote: an ‘understandable reaction to the given circumstances’. From there it cut to the first planet that he had been stationed to, after a brief explanation that he had received help from a razum’yilahnfor the trauma he endured in his time spent aboard the mahn’ewe ship.
They saw him jump in front of a comparatively small - but no less ferocious - feline to save his team, and they saw his first interaction with the natives of that planet, most notably the incident where he first met their domesticated canines. It was actually surprisingly heartwarming to watch, especially after the scene with the canine and feline in the mahn’ewe ship. Then - rather amusingly, garnering a new kind of respect from the patrons in his bar - they saw him ingest some berry that the plant-people of that planet grew on themselves, after which he was *obviously* intoxicated, his inhibitions seemingly going out the airlock a few minutes after eating it.
On to the second planet, where a new side of the human was shown, with him and his pup - that had been gifted to him by the hamad’ruid, which was the loophole that was needed for anyone to bring a new animal off planet without first knowing how removing it would affect the environment - running happily through the trees, the razum’yilahn from his team wrapped around his neck and torso, providing her the heat she needed to survive on their mission, and providing *him* the Gift of telekinesis, which would be helpful in case he was attacked by a wild animal, or met another sapient race.
The third planet was pretty uneventful, apparently, seeing as all that was shown was a few clips demonstrating that the tension that had been evident between him and the vell’prah leading the group had obviously been resolved somehow, and obviously sometime on the ride between planets. What was more interesting was his experience aboard the space station the ship he was on stopped at.
First was a bit of clips showing him being escorted around the station by an official-looking suun’mahs, stopping at a tailor’s first; where the human got a look of terror on his face as soon as he saw the shop owner, running off and later confirming to the suun’mahs with him that he was arachnophobic. He refused the offer to go elsewhere however, stating that now that he was dealing with *sapient* beings, he needed to get over his fears, going back to the shop to be fitted for a new wardrobe. And he managed to make it through the measurements, though it was obvious that he was on edge the entire time.
Next they went to a lovely drahk’mihn’s makeup shop, where he bought some eyeshadow and lipstick - and paid to have her apply it for him - along with dying one side of the little bit of hair humans seemed to have only on their heads, as well. After that was done, and they had retrieved his clothes from the shop, the suun’mahs began to escort him to the section of the station where the hotels were located.
Along the way, they met up with a group of humans who had been part of the initial ‘testing’ of having their species working in Federation jobs, all of whom had - understandably - chosen to work with their ambassador. However, they revealed to the Ambassador that they had found a missing child, who turned out to be none other than a gal’guin, too young to be expected to understand Federation Standard. And in an act that displayed that he didn’t hold what had happened on the ship against their species as a whole, he stood on the railing of the walkway - another human doing the same at his back - and yelled out *quite* loudly, stating that they had found a lost child, asking if anyone was looking for them; and before he could finish, a pair of gal’guin came flying over, anxiety etched in their every movement.

As with all my stories, there has and never will be a season 8. All my stories "Always" pick up from Hollander's Woods. I've fudged their ages a little to fit the narrative.
Kate was browsing on her I-Pad at vacation destinations. She took a sideways glance at her husband next to her, they were both leaning up against the headboard. He was on his computer consumed in his latest story. She put her head against the headboard and closed her eyes for a minute. Eighteen years, they've been married over 18years, with 3 kids all teens. She just turned 52 and Her husband's next birthday would be his 62nd. Kate opened her eyes and looked at him again. His hair was 50% white, and he had to wear glasses for close up writing and reading. She thought he was still the sexiest man alive, and they still went at it like teenagers.
Rick felt his wife staring at him. he mischievously placed his hand on her thigh and started running it up her leg. Kate blurted out, "Oh no you don't lover boy. Not tonight. Do you know that I had to limp into work this morning, from that acrobatic move you put me in last night... Rick, I just don't bend like that anymore!
Her husband chuckled, "I didn't hear you complaining last night".
Kate huffed, "Yeah well it's like when you get drunk, your happy in the moment but there's hell to pay the next day". She hit him in the arm and said, "They were laughing at me at work, at least the women were. I had a couple of them yell out, "Hey Captain what did you and Rick get up to last night." Kate, remembering their last night session smiled and said, "I feel like I've pulled something in my hamstrings. You have to be aware that I'm 52, and I don't bend like I used to.
"Never thought I'd hear that my wife would concede that I was too much man for her", Castle laughed.
"Oh, really mister big shot stud, what about last year when they had to peal you out of the limo. You threw your back out for 3 weeks", Kate smiled at the recollection.
Castle chuckled, "Well it seemed like a good idea at the time, I must have misjudged the dismount".
Kate laughing said, "And then on top of everything they drag you out of the Limo and you've got my underwear in your hands. Then you proceed to put my underwear on your head and started yelling out to everyone that you were the Frito Bandito. I still can't look at Ken (the limo driver) anymore without him looking at me with a big smirk on his face".
"I blame you for that. That Policeman's Benefit Gala you dragged to was boooorrring!... I think I had too much champagne trying to get thru the mind-numbing conversations that were going on. I know you were obligated to go, but my god it was like watching paint dry, but your right honey from now on I'll take your age into account when I pull my special maneuvers". Castle smirked.
She looked at him and smiled, "Shut Up".
They went back to what they were doing. They had always been comfortable in their silence. Being together was all that they needed. Castle noticed his wife was running her hands up and down his arm. After they had gotten engaged years ago, he noticed she was really a big cuddler and toucher, which had surprised him, but since the incident 4 years ago it had gotten much more noticeable. Rick thought back in his head to that day.
4 years ago, Castle and Kate had been in the kitchen. She had a rare day off from work, the kids were in school, so it was just them. When all of a sudden, he had started to clutch his chest. He had yelled out to Kate, and she started calling 911. Kate was in tears as they had wheeled him into the hospital. They had found out that he just had a major panic attack due to high levels of stress. Gina and Paula had swamped him in Book tours, and Book signings, plus were pushing him about his next novel, and it had just been too much.
When they got home Kate had gone into a tirade. "Rick" she yelled, "Give me your phone. I'm taking over management of your dealings with Black Pawn and Paula from now on and I don't want to hear a single argument from you about this", as she pointed a finger at him, "Dammit Rick, your just too nice for your own good, you don't know when to say no. This Fucking stops today, Rick, do you hear me. No More"!
Castle sheepishly had handed his phone over to her and said, "Sorry honey".
"Oh Baby, I'm not mad at you, I just want my husband to not be bullied". She then grabbed his phone and stalked off into his office. He listened in from the outside.
Kate had lit into Gina and Paula from the get-go, "Do you know what? Rick and I just came back from the ER, because we thought he was having a heart attack. It ended up having a massive panic attack, due to the stress he's been under trying to keep up with this fucked up schedule that you've both been trying to ram down his throat. I'm here to tell you that this shit is going to end now. From this point going forward, I will be handling all of Rick's obligations, and let me tell you this, we are going to be cutting waaayyyy back on everything!
Rick had heard his ex-wife Gina start to yell back at Kate, but Kate shut her down right away. "Gina, one more word from you, and Rick and I will start looking at over the dozens of prominent Publishing houses that have offers for him to come over to them. His graphic novels, children's books, serious Literature, and the occasional Nikki Heat books have him at the top of authors in the fucking world. We don't need either of you anymore. Rick continues to be loyal to Black Pawn because they gave him his start, but I don't share that loyalty. Are both of you fucking hearing me? I want my husband with me forever, and I will no longer allow you two to use his kindhearted nature against him anymore. Paula, send me a revised schedule that reflects a much lighter load, Rick and I will go thru them, and then you will get what we think is fair. It will be non-negotiable, you don't like it, then that's fine by us, because I will make both of you, yesterday's news. The days of you using my husband as your personal gravy train are over, and Gina listen to me well, if you try to go behind my back and try to contact Rick on your own, I will fucking bury you... Now, I need to hear that you both understand".
Paula said, "Kate I'm so sorry, I didn't know that Ricky was struggling with the schedule, I always think of him a machine. Tell Ricky I'm sorry, and hope he feels better. I'll get on that new schedule right away"?
Kate barked out "Gina I'm not hearing anything from you". Rick heard silence for what seemed forever, and then he heard his ex-wife yell back, "Fine", and then she hung up.
He remembered Kate running off to their bedroom and finding her in their bed crying. As he got in bed with her and held her tight, she buried her face in his chest and said, "I can't be without you Babe... I Can't... I just Can't." He remembers telling her, trying to get her to smile, "Hey honey nice use of the Senator Bracken quote when you saved his life... I'll fucking bury you... that's a classic!
Kate had chuckled thru a sob, "Well that douchebag was at least good for something".
He then assured her that he was going nowhere, and that they would have their always. After that incident and all the free time that opened due to Kate managing his time, he had got back into the gym and started working out again. He had built up some muscle and had lost 20 pounds. Kate told him how proud she was of him and noticed how she liked to fondle his biceps even more then she usually did.
A couple of months ago she told him that she was putting in her 30 and was going to retire from the force. She told him that she wanted to spend more time with him and the kids. He knew his wife; she was probably thinking that time was slipping away from them and wanted to make their moments count. It's not like that thought hadn't occurred to him too. Castle broke from his reverie, as he heard of in the distance, "Babe, are you even listening to me? Rick...Rick".
He turned to look at his wife, "Sorry honey, I'm sorry, I went off into la la land again".
Kate smiled and said, "So, where did you go this time in that amazing brain of yours? Good thoughts?"
"Honey, when I think of you their always good thoughts." he replied.
"I love you too, you big sap. Anyway, I was thinking about just you and I going on a vacation. For maybe 3 weeks. I've already looked into it, and I think that everything will line up. I called downtown, and 1PP said that Javy could take over as captain while I'm gone, it will give him some experience for when I retire, and he takes over. Alexis and David (her husband of 5 years) said that they were thinking of going to the Hamptons for the summer, so they could watch the boys along with Lanie. You know Lanie, any excuse to stay in the Hamptons with the boys, plus Lilly told me of a summer program starting at Columbia that was promoting classes for advanced kids that want to learn languages especially Russian, and she asked if she could go."
"Will there be boys there, I worry about Flower on her own"? Castle asked.
Kate smiled at him calling his daughter, Flower. He had called his daughter Little Flower since she was a baby. Kate had actually asked Lilly if she wanted her Dad, to stop calling her Flower, and she was taken back, at how panicked her daughter had gotten. Lilly had started to cry, and said, "No, Mom, don't say anything to Daddy, I love that he calls me Flower. He can call me that forever". Kate, had to calm her down and reassure her that she would say nothing.
"Babe, flower will be fine. I'll have Javy run a background check, on everyone involved, but she's going be fine. (Rick still had the occasional nightmare from when Alexis was kidnapped, so she had to walk a fine line when broaching Columbia). "Look Rick she's growing up; she needs to have the reigns loosened a little and see that we can trust her.
Castle turned his head to her, and she saw that he was fighting back tears. "I just need to know that she's safe Kate. I couldn't bear anything happening to her. We'll all sit down and look at the program tomorrow, and I promise if all goes well on the background check that she can go. Okay"?
"Okay Babe, but you need to have an open mind on this. Take it from a someone that knows what it's like to be a teenage girl. You hold the reigns to tight; they start to feel strangled. Remember how you and Alexis went back and forth when you were trying to hold on to tight? If the background check comes out clean you need to let her go.
Castle sighed, and said, "Okay honey she can go, I don't want to hurt her feelings, but it won't make me worry less. I want daily phone calls from her. No exceptions".
Kate knew that Lilly was a Daddy's girl, and that he was very protective of her much like he was of Alexis. Kate always knew he would be an amazing father but watching him over the years had simply amazed her. The kids adored him, he was so attentive and loving, plus his world of imagination captured them from when they were little. Royce, wanted to be a writer since he was 7, and he wrote every chance he got. Castle told him how proud of him he was as he did with all the kids. James, (Royce's twin brother) was more like her, constantly getting into scraps trying to protect other kids from bullies. Kate had already started to work with him on the speed bag, and Rick always told James that he would-be a kickass cop just like his mother. Castle would spin stories of their exploits, making them so spectacular then even though she had lived threw them, she was still riveted in the way he had spun their tales. The kids always gasped at just what their parents had been thru before they were born. Castle and Kate had decided a long time ago that they would try as best they could to never tell them of just how close they had been to death so many times as partners, though Castle told her it was just a matter of time until they find out, considering how much of their exploits had made local and national news, so they always prepared for that day.
Kate still to this day berated herself for those early years when she had pushed him away, she knew how much she had hurt him at times. He had become the light to her darkness, and she realized that every year that she had kept him at arm's length was a year that she could never get back being so helplessly in love with him.
Changing the subject Kate said to Rick, " Rick we need a vacation, I want just you and me to get away, you know I love our kids, but I miss my husband. I need this to happen Babe, I need alone time with you. I want it to just be us. Talk about anything we want, do anything we want, and know that there will be no interruptions".
"Honey", he replied, "You don't have to sell me on this, I'm all in. I even have an idea. Remember the year of our engagement when I told you about a college friend that turned into a billionaire by the age of 30 and bought his own island"?
Kate got excited and said, "Yeah...yeah, I remember saying that we should invite him to the wedding.
"Well, I just happen to know that he doesn't stay there anymore but he rents out the place for friends. It's a beautiful bungalow with all the amenities. They ship in food by boat, every 4 days. You can request scuba gear, jet skis, whatever, and they will be waiting for you when you get there. Plenty of booze to make tropical drinks, and the best part is that you hardly need any clothes, because it's a secluded Island. You can go naked, or bring just your thong, or bikini, but the point is that you can pack light. For emergencies their just 30 minutes away by boat. Just to let you know however, if you just wear your bikini underwear, I will have to confiscate them and turn into the Frito Bandito".
"You'll have to catch me first hot shot... Rick, do you think that you can find out tomorrow, to see if its available"?
"First thing in the morning honey", he winked.
A little while later Kate had fallen silent. Castle looked over at his wife and saw her fisting her hands in the sheets, she did that when she was broaching a subject that she felt insecure about. "What's going on in that gorgeous mind of yours honey".
Kate starred down at the sheets and whispered. "Do you still think I'm beautiful Babe? I was looking in the mirror this morning, and I just felt so ugly, I've got all these stretch marks, bullet scars, knife wounds and I've probably put on 10 pounds of baby fat that I can't get off. I look in the mirror sometimes and think why you still want me sometimes.
Castle put his computer away, and he rolled over to face his wife. 'Katherine Castle, I can't believe what just came out of your mouth", he ran his hands under her Green Lantern night shirt pulling it all the way up to her stomach, then proceeded to plant light butterfly kisses all over her stretch marks. Kate looked down, mesmerized at what her husband was doing. Castle rose up and pulled Kate's chin up to look into her eyes. Those eyes that he fell into from the moment he first met her.
"Honey, do you know how amazing and beautiful you are to me"? Kate's eyes misted over. "Kate", he said, "These marks show the strength and determination of my warrior woman, who gave birth to our 3 wonderful children and when doctors warned you that twins at 42 would be too great a risk, you told them to shove it up their asses, and you fought and fought to bring them into this world. Your bullets scars are our history of fighting for justice, and your determination to face down all the evil in this world... Remember the banquet we went to a few months ago"? Kate with tears in her eyes nodded. Castle continued, "Everywhere we went that night I watched as every man turned to look at you as you were clearly the most beautiful woman in the whole place. I wrapped my arms around you to let one and all know that you were mine. I'm still amazed even after all these years what I did to deserve such a strong, independent, loving mother and wife as yourself. I will always be grateful for the day that you became mine, and I always find you stunning. You take my breath away sometimes.
As her husband wiped the tears from her eyes she smiled and said, "Babe if I'd known what I know now I would have let you debrief me, when I first met you".
Rick chuckled and said, "And I would have still had no idea, and don't think for one second you were fooling anyone when you walked away from me down that alley, putting a major swing to those beautiful hips of yours, I knew what you were doing".
She smiled at looked at him under those long lashes, "I might have put a little more oomph into my walk. I could already tell that you were an ass man".
Kate rolled over and placed her head on her husband's chest. They went to bed almost always like that every night. Castle ran his hands thru her hair. As Kate slipped off to dream world, she mumbled, "Don't forget to call your billionaire friend tomorrow Rick", and then she followed that up with, "Love you Always Baby".
"Me too honey...Me Too. You are my dream come true. Until tomorrow honey".
"Night Babe", she mumbled.
Castle smiled remembering the day that Kate asked why he couldn't just say goodnight. He had replied, "Goodnight is boring, until tomorrow was more... hopeful", and she had said, "Well I'm just a cop Castle so... night". He smiled at that memory and thought to himself how he still occasionally had to pinch himself when he looked at his amazing children and the love of his life. He told Kate once that his dreams do come true. He looked at his wife, her head on his chest sleeping and he thought that he was the luckiest man in the world. He smiled as he fell asleep knowing that he would soon see her again... in his dreams.
Hope you liked!
Thinking of doing a sequel to this, where the kids find newspaper clipping of Casketts exploits and want to know more.

We have been together for over 4 years. She wanted to go slow and I will admit I was going fast, but I slowed down for her. Since we live less then 20 minutes apart, we have been in a same pattern of a weekday and every weekend getting together for the past 2 years or so. Recently, we both have expressed interests of me moving in with her. First to be closer, and second to save money for our future.
We had come up with a game plan in early/mid April for me to pack up and consolidate my stuff and fully move in around Memorial day weekend. However, my dad recently had a chest scan and they found a nodule on his lung. On the CT scan it was reported to be small, approx 1cm, and my dad while worried was moving on with life. As was my girlfriend and myself with the plans to move in.
Two weeks ago a more detailed PET scan was taken and its larger then CT scan showed, approx 4cm. This alarmed him and myself as this was not as small as we thought. We don't fully know what it is yet as he is scheduled for some tests and a biopsy over the next few weeks.
Now my parents and I are very close and talk multiple times a week. Where she is more distant with her parents. Example, her dad had to have semi major back surgery and she called her parents the day before his surgery and then a few days after and that was more or less it.
Anyway.... With my dads lung nodule going on I want to be there for him and my mom. Odds are its cancer or even if not he will need to have the nodule removed based on its size. They are looking to travel to a better cancesurgery hospital to get it removed that what is local hospital near them.
I communicated to her I might need slow down on the timeline of me moving in as I might need to be there for my dad. Whether that be being there on the weekends with him, or when they travel me taking care of their house, or slim possibility of me going to where they are getting the surgery done for a short period of time.
She exploded that I was coming up with an excuse to not move in and that I was not having her be my number 1 priority. I explained I am still moving in, my timeline is adjusting I don't have an exact date as there are still some unknowns. She was upset that I am choosing my dad over her. She said we talked about this before about my dads lung nodule and that it would not effect the move in. I explained that was with the information we know that it was small.
She was still upset and said that as almost 40 year old I need to pull away from my parents. While I agree to an extent that yes I am very close to my parents for an almost 40 year old; I have my own independence and don't live though them nor they through me. However, having a medical event I need to support them.
Later the next night, while at my own place, I was talking to my dad for an extended period of time, hour and a half plus. Just listening and crying and being scared together but also leaning on each other. Usually my girlfriend will call to say goodnight, however I was still talking to my dad when she called. I texted saying I was talking to my dad to give me a few minutes. She replied ok, then few minutes later saying I need to setup boundaries with him.
10 to 15 minutes later when I was done talking to my dad I called her. Instantly she went to I am not giving her the priority and that my dads emotions are causing me to loose myself and that this is all an excuse to not move in.
This past weekend I was at my parents place for support and just being with them, and normally I text good morning to her, maybe two or three times during the day, and a call in the evening to say good night. Maybe even a call in the mid day...
Anyway, when I spoke to her Saturday evening she went off on how I was not texting her enough or calling or I would not reply to her text with in 5-10 minutes.... and I quote from her, "You need to be texting me every two to three hours to let me know your OK."
AITA for delaying moving in or even AITA for wanting to end this relationship?

Every so often, I remember that there's a whole community of Frasier freaks here.
Need to make a reference? Frasier will get it. Want to have a whole conversation in Frasier quotes? Frasier understands.
Never shall we encounter the ultimate tragedy of being witty and alone.
So raise a glass (🍷Veneer!) or smoke a fine cigar (this is what men do, isn't it, dad?) or however else you like to celebrate (Fridge pants 👖) , and treat yourself to your favourite toy. Whatever that may be.
Goodnight Seattle

The war is over! I'm sure the characters are exhilarated. I'm not unhappy about it, but I get the feeling that JF would have dragged the war years along longer (I can't be sure of this, but he did seem to thrive, writing during this era) if those scenes at the front weren't so darned expensive to shoot.
So, lots of things change. Downton is back to being a regular house (well, as regular as a house of that size can be anyway), and Mrs Bates is dead, but lots of things remain the same, like Robert's dislike of Richard (running off to the village to meet with Jarvis to avoid seeing him), and Cora's sudden cruelty crusade.
https://preview.redd.it/abijckvxnmyc1.jpg?width=777&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d1b74f0b82dd27a1b68eb12bd17def5170e9076a
I get that JF wanted to give us a taste of how the upper classes *actually* were like back in the day, but it is quite jarring when it happens. So far on the show Cora has been largely like what any woman of her social class would be, if a bit nicer in general. I did forget just how much she herself grows and mellows as the years pass, they all do become much kinder.
Anyway, for now, she wants Robert to get rid of Bates because his wife killed herself, and she wants to get rid of "lame" Matthew too.
Cora: Robert! I want him to learn to be as independent as he can, and I want Mary to get on with her life. What’s wrong with that?
So, in the previous episode, Cora lied to Lavinia to make her think Matthew needed her, to get her back to Downton, Carlisle manhandled Mary, and basically told her to fall in line, let Matthew be Lavinia's business, or else, and yet it seems neither plan worked, at least not to perfection, because apparently putting obligations in the way between two people who love each other doesn't mean the love goes away. Who would have thought.
Robert asking Cora if there's something about Matthew and Mary that she's not telling him about is quite, quite significant.
https://preview.redd.it/plfv91eznmyc1.jpg?width=825&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dfa9ee28e4809d981603791762811eedbccefd4f
He doesn't understand what's going on. He thought Mary's love now was one sided. he thought, once Lavinia was back, things would sort themselves out, Mary would focus on Richard, as much as he hated him, and yet there Matthew and Mary were, still orbiting around each other.
What he doesn't know of course, is that Mary didn't refuse Matthew because she didn't love him. She refused him because in spite of the fact that both their families wanted the match, and the fact that since her reputation was ruined in London it would be hard for her to ever find as good a match as that, she was too much of a coward to admit the story about Pamuk. She loved him too much to lie. So she let herself suffer in silence for two years after Matthew left, and then it was all brought inevitably back to the surface after he came back.
And from Matthew's end, he had his feelings well locked away when he and Lavinia came to Downton. But of course, that's not sustainable. The more time he spent with Mary the more they came to the surface, so it was impossible for him NOT to want to spend time with Mary, even though he was engaged to Lavinia.
So Robert was having trouble, seeing all that but knowing 1/10th of the story.
Robert: If thinking that trying to protect Mary with a ring of steel is silly, then, yes, I am very silly.
My good man. Finally. For all he says he doesn't understand, he at least KNOWS. He knows that binding Mary, his very independent eldest daughter, in a marriage of convenience from which she won't be able to escape, to "protect" her from feelings beyond her control, is silly (let's be honest Robert, it's beyond silly, it's fucking horrible.)
https://preview.redd.it/0yx5r5hammyc1.jpg?width=1644&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4319e6b66360c6420305e331c78b50b6fecb439a
This asshole. He does make me want to quote Milton's Paradise Lost:
"Better to reign in Hell, than to serve in Heaven" Sounds like Carlisle.
Like the sweet talking devil that he is, he tries to lure Anna in the same way he tried to lure Carson: through her love and devotion to Mary. He pretends to want her to spy on Mary, for Mary's sake. Because he wants to make Mary happy.
Thank God, Anna is way smarter than that. And sees straight through him and his bullshit. I also like how she resembles Mary here: Carlisle asks her not to mention her conversation to Mary. Anna doesn't want to make an enemy out of him. But she also doesn't want to leave Mary in ignorance. So she doesn't tell Mary, but she tells Carson.
Perfect character work, honestly.
https://preview.redd.it/gwazlw7emmyc1.jpg?width=1515&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=940c496af6e3fbf8bede191b5751411694648cef
Mary: Have you seen the boys’ haircuts the women are wearing in Paris?
Matthew: I hope you won’t try that.
Mary: I might.
I *love* this scene.
First of all, Matthew, well done giving yourself away, now we all know you have a thing for Mary's hair.
Second of all, Matthew, FFS 😭
He says it SO flirtatiously. His fiancée is right there. Her fiancé is right there. He's forgotten himself. He grew so used to their usual rapport, all this time spending their days together because he was injured he FORGOT that actually, he's not free to show his appreciation for her.
Also, look at Mary. She's surprised. And slightly pissed off.
First of all, he brings her into an awkward situation. Carlisle has already tried to force her to his will, she doesn't know how he might react to Matthew being so openly appreciative of her. Or so confident in giving her directions with such abandon, when Carlisle had to literally push her against a wall to make her see his way.
Second of all, honestly, how dare he show appreciation now. When she lowered herself so far down she offered to be his nurse TWICE only for him to reject her.
But she's Mary Crawley, and she loves this idiot. So she doesn't react badly. She takes it all in, and just says she might try it. And if they hadn't figured themselves out she'd have shaved her head just to piss him off (kidding. But she'd have definitely cut her hair).
Speaking of third parties present for this moment:
https://preview.redd.it/4bnwp64jmmyc1.jpg?width=1581&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9a041667d3e0c4fb2e416baac3813de80c70a68f
Lavinia: I’m not sure how feminine it is.
Mary: I’m not sure how feminine I am.
Richard: Very, I’m glad to say.
Note: I added Violet's reaction because this is where she starts to understand things are more serious than she thought. Yes, Mary is going ahead with her engagement with Carlisle, but her reaction here is serious. God knows Mary has a sharp tongue, the fact that she didn't lash out and put Matthew in his place for this comment? Not even an ever so slight "well it's my hair, my business"?? Very serious.
Also, I *love* Mary's response to Lavinia's comment.
The poor girl tried to salvage the situation for Matthew. Making it seem like it was up for grabs to make comments about the haircut in relation to Mary. But Mary's "I'm not sure how feminine I am" is exquisite. Because first of all, it's a very slight show of vulnerability. Every woman has questioned that. We're judged for our femininity from the moment we're born, and so has Lady Mary Crawley. But she's a confident woman who isn't afraid of saying this openly.
And also, in her case, it's largely true. Because if we look at what was considered Feminine, for the time, it wasn't Mary. Mary was not the Angel in the Home. She was not a docile creature with no thoughts and no opinions, there to serve her Mastehusband and bear him children and not speak a peep. Mary looked at that and said yeah, no thanks, that's not me, that will never be me, let that image perish. She made her own version of womanhood and she made it fit her size and she was proud of it, as she should have been. Even if that made her very male-coded for the time.
Richard's response is ignorant and stupid and superficial, and the only reason I added it was to show the difference between Matthew's gentle, flirtatious comment, Lavinia's kindness, Mary's thoughtful and intelligent response, and Richard's callous and authoritative manner, thinking he can decide for Mary who she is.
Omg he can fuck right off, when is he out I can't stand writing about him anymore.
https://preview.redd.it/6mwts2exmmyc1.jpg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6f35256367caaa26eaba6acd1b72935ca3ffca37
Dear Carson describing his paternal love for Mary simply to tell Mrs Hughes that she doesn't know her, not like he does, but not judging her for not knowing Mary well enough to understand her, or why Carson is so devoted to her. Mary certainly never judged anyone for buying the mask she wore in front of the world at large.
Speaking of devotion:
https://preview.redd.it/mgn8mizymmyc1.jpg?width=1661&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e0232e8f5be4b37e0881476d397438ca07ff8be0
Mary: Well, I wish she'd come to me first. So, you mean you'd be uncomfortable working for a spymaster? How disappointing of you. And I always thought you were fond of me.
Mary is hurt, deeply by this. For so many reasons.
First of all, like I said in the previous episode, it had been a shock to her that Carson would uproot his life for her sake. She knows him as well as he knows her, and she knows how much Downton means to him. And while her mother pushed her to Carlisle for the family's sake, and her father closed his eyes and ears to all happening around him, the fact that there was ONE parental figure who'd show such care for her had moved her deeply, and had given her strength.
From what she says to him "We'd educate him together" she must have had conversations with Carson over what to do with Richard. Mary did not go into that marriage with her eyes closed. She hoped that as much as Richard thought he'd tie her up with his male superiority, she'd be able to bend things around him via societal rules and regulations. Smart woman.
But now Carson was leaving her. Not only that, he was leaving her KNOWING he was leaving her to deal with this horrible, horrible man by herself. Just like the rest of her family did.
And Mary wasn't an idiot. She grew up in aristocratic circles. She must have known, must have seen before, what bad marriages did to women. So she's so afraid. And so hurt. And so bereft. And of course, she dismisses Carson, and says "and I always thought you were fond of me" because to Mary, if you love someone, you don't abandon them when they need you the most. She didn't abandon Matthew. She didn't abandon Sybil. Or Tom. So clearly, this wasn't love.
https://preview.redd.it/v3ahatt0nmyc1.jpg?width=1182&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0932645770330fc6527ea62397767392fb5e534f
The way she looks at Richard. With so much resentment. But she knows this is a situation she created, largely. Although, the fact that she did it mostly for her family's sake kills me.
Something I hadn't remembered: Mary didn't say that "Butlers will be two a penny" line in front of Carson.
https://preview.redd.it/dduty5b2nmyc1.jpg?width=1182&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a60736672bd1a52e436a1ef5426d0f5ba0382ad5
We all know that Carson didn't "abandon" Mary. Not really. I think, because this was still early years, I think he thought that by telling her the truth of her intended, she'd be persuaded to break it off with him. He hoped she'd at least question Richard over his tactics to get her so very trapped under his thumb. But poor Carson doesn't know WHY Mary is with Richard. And that of course, she wouldn't question his tactics. She's well aware of them. All she could do here was to protect herself by lying. By trying not to let Richard know just how desperate she is.
Carson tries to get the same idea across by speaking to Robert. I think, again, he's trying to change the course of Mary's life, somehow, but I don't think he's aware how relactant Robert is in interfering with Mary's plans. Although God knows why.
Carson: *going on about how awful Richard is and that he wouldn't leave Downton to work for him*
Robert: I'll take that as a compliment for myself and for my house.
Yeah, sure. Completely ignore the fact that your daughter's future husband is an absolute asshole.
https://preview.redd.it/kzrvwn6anmyc1.jpg?width=1182&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c8cd84d9ce81cb0070b6ff3d2c351e549abcaf03
She's so happy about Matthew, she doesn't even care her own life is an absolute mess. Violet cares more about Mary's life than she herself does.
https://preview.redd.it/1ups7co4nmyc1.jpg?width=1443&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2c8b2f33e29884a4d02dc009d6967b1c2185fefc
Look at Cora's face when Matthew announces he wants to marry Lavinia at Downton and Cora watches as Robert agrees readily and Mary just about dies.
Oh sure, now you realise what you've done. You fucking idiot.
I cannot deal with Mary here. She was so happy for Matthew, that he'd get the life he deserved. But to her, here, he's chosen Lavinia over her. Twice now.
Because he accepted Lavinia's offer of caring for him, when he refused Mary's offer. Twice. And if she thought that before, he was doing it because he couldn't walk again, now she thinks it's because he simply loves Lavinia more than he loves her. Because she couldn't have been more obvious in her love for him, and she knows it.
And so she sits there, after being told by her second father that he's abandoned her because her future husband is a piece of shit, to watch the love of her life pick another woman over her.
Someone take the TV away from me because I'm about to throw it at the wall.
By the way, we see Robert place Matthew's needs ahead of Mary's for the millionth time, by agreeing to have Matthew's wedding at Downton. For all her flaws, Cora at least did what she THOUGHT was best for Mary, as misguided as that was. Robert simply places Mary's need second to Matthew's, and he does it without a second thought.
I don't want to hate him, so I'm hoping, HOPING, he does it because he hopes this might give Mary more time to break it off with Richard. I'm sincerely hoping that's the case, otherwise Robert is up for Worst Father of the Year award.
https://preview.redd.it/3cg2nz38nmyc1.jpg?width=1443&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cbad1b82596acc92986ecf23499e00e6f3e04dae
Mary is done with everyone's bullshit, including her own.
"Aren't all of us stuck with the choices we make?" I don't know who I hope was in the receiving end of that cold, cold look from her. I'm torn between Cora and Matthew.
Mary blames herself, of course, for the situation she's found herself in. And as far as Matthew and Richard are concerned, that's largely true. Even if it was things outside of her control that led her to make said choices, she made them. And maybe she did it for the family name, and for herself, since she was so afraid of her secret, and for Matthew, largely, but she made them. And this is the kind of cruel woman she would become if things evolved the way they were going.
Because yes, we're all stuck with the choices we make. But we can't ignore the reasons that lead us to make said choices. And we should leave some space in our hearts to be kind to others, and to ourselves. And that's true for Ethel, and for you, Mary dear. Don't beat yourself up so harshly, you don't deserve it either.
It's time. Violet has had enough of everyone's bullshit.
https://preview.redd.it/g9kbixjenmyc1.jpg?width=1443&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=71b26c886864c5e69f8207f9e1c39d4bc3e65853
I love his shock at the words "Mary is STILL in love with you"
He certainly hadn't missed the fact that she loved him now. Nobody's that devoted to a person they don't love. But I think this is the moment he finally learns she's always loved him. Poor boy.
I also love his response, because he makes it obvious that this is NOT the first time he's considered any of this.
Matthew: Lavinia came back against my orders, determined to look after me for the rest of my life, which meant that she would wash me and f--feed me and...do things that only the most dedicated nurse would undertake, and all with no hope of children or any improvement. [...] Do you think it would be right for me to throw her over because I can walk? To dismiss her because I no longer have need of her services?
First of all, it becomes clear that he doesn't know of Cora and Richard's involvement in Lavinia's return. Lavinia didn't come back "against his orders". Lavinia came back because Cora's letter made her believe Matthew would welcome her return.
Second of all, he says "Do you think it would be right for me to throw her over because I can walk?"
This tells us another thing: Matthew did not take Lavinia back because he was unaware of his, or Mary's feelings. He was perfectly aware of them. He simply hadn't wanted to bind Mary to him when he thought she could find a better life elsewhere. He loved her too much. He allowed Lavinia back in his life, and now the only thing, the one thing that kept him bound to her was not his feelings, but his duty.
Richard is largely responsible for this. Because he brought Lavinia back for his sake. Mary and Matthew are largely responsible for this, because they let their obligations and duties to other rank higher than their duties to themselves and to each other.
It takes two to tango, and it takes four to ruin two relationships. Mary and Matthew had been stupid, yes. But they did their best with a difficult situation, and they were largely duty bound more to societal rules than to themselves and to each other. Lavinia WAS an innocent victim of circumstance, although she would have saved herself had she been allowed to leave, and Richard was a knowing bringer of misery so, fuck him, honestly.
https://preview.redd.it/1nn6usdmnmyc1.jpg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9fb52b8f7401051a71b7befb2517bf6ddf01f815
I do love Matthew's face when Violet says he "spoke like a man of honour" a face that screams "fuck my honour" if I've ever seen one.
https://preview.redd.it/6bv84ayhomyc1.jpg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=46b4c8825ccd228152523b9dc187a911a012da24
Mary thinking of a honeymoon with Carlisle and dissociating. Regardless of anything else, I'm so, so glad she wasn't stuck with him. Not for longer than this stupid engagement anyway. I think she'd have managed it, somehow. She a very strong person. But it would have been a difficult life. Love brings out the best in people, and it's no wonder she was at her best when there was so much love in her life.
She also finally questions Carlisle about his spy plan. I love that she made sure to protect Anna, when he asks "She told you, did she?" she clarifies that "she told someone else" and she protects Carson too.
Also, genius:
https://preview.redd.it/wdm1ywo5omyc1.jpg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7899744f5fcecd2bda33506b617d24730d169be8
Carlisle: Are you still in love with Matthew Crawley?
Mary: Of course not! Would I ever admit to loving a man who preferred someone else over me?
Such a devious asshole. She denies loving Matthew, and then says she'd never admit to loving someone who picked someone else over her.
Essentially, she's telling the truth. Although, the fact that she thinks he picked Lavinia because he no longer loved hedidn't love her enough, makes my heart hurt. She always thinks she's overruled in the affections of the people in her life by someone/something else.
Robert picks Matthew over her. Carson picks his honour over her. Matthew picks Lavinia over her.
In the end, the last one especially, is not true. And not only because Matthew DID love Mary more, but also because, in the end, regardless of whether or not Lavinia got sick, he would pick Mary over his honour. He DID pick Mary over his honour. Sorry, I'm getting ahead of myself but I need something to hold on to when people are being so stupid right now.
I love that in all this mess, she STILL thinks of Sybil.
https://preview.redd.it/bwj4ecfbomyc1.jpg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=191825bb08216796f75a9a706b7df4fea9cc7db0
While all this happens in Mary's life, Sybil is eloping with Tom. She'd said she had a headache and Mary, devoted sister that she is, finds out because she went to her room to wish her goodnight.
https://preview.redd.it/i1zmeo3eomyc1.jpg?width=1119&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a9348e001efd78337eeee2a527be5ef80ac532b
I also love that it was Mary *and* Edith that went after Sybil. I know Mary needed someone to drive the car, but some Crawley girls solidarity is so nice to see. If only JF had realised that a healthy relationship between the sisters was much more enjoyable than them being at each others throats 😒
Mary "of course Mama and Papa will hate it"
Tom "Why should they"
Mary "Oh, pipe down"
She's hilarious. She doesn't dismiss them, but she dismisses their stupidity in running away, and Tom's refusal of reality, in this instance. But she treats him So Well.
She's honest, that she'll try to change Sybil's mind. But she also shows him respect. When he says he'll return the car in the morning she accepts it, she offers him money, out of consideration, but when he refuses it she respects him and moves on. God knows she is exceptional in her manners, and in considering others, when she wants to be. Clearly her sister saw something in this man, and Mary will treat him with the respect he deserves, not only as just another human being, but as her sister's choice, which will become more apparent as Tom and Sybil's relationship progresses.
https://preview.redd.it/gtxdk73gomyc1.jpg?width=1119&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=887f23ceb3513cc82a8120ce049d28865aaa4ed0
Also, sorry, Isobel, you can't put Mary's charm in the barrel for the village children. To think, he thought he could give her up, when he couldn't even give up her childhood toy, the one she gave him so he could have a piece of home when he was at the front. Presumably, like Isobel said, he was home now, but he wasn't really, because Mary is his home, like he is hers.
And on that positive note, see you next week for the 2.8. Yet another pain-fest!

SYNOPSIS: (~1400 words)
You discover that your bully has a Twitch DJ stream playing goth music, and confront her at school. She is dismissive and sarcastic until you force her to answer the question: why does she bully you? Her answer(s) set up a conversation that leads to a sort of truce-making over shared war stories, and the script ends with the possibility that the two of you could become friends (or more).
TERMS:

• You can fill, post, and monetize freely. Just credit me (as u/RHfactoral) and if your fill is behind a paywall, let me download a copy for myself.
• You are free to make cosmetic/surface modifications (name changes, minor wording choices for the sake of flow, ad libs), as long as they don't drastically affect the plotline and overall atmosphere. Genderflipping is also welcome.
• DM me on Reddit if you'd like to make more drastic changes
• You are not free to add anything hateful/bigoted/xenophobic to this script.
• SFX are suggestions, not rules. I include them mainly to help indicate things like physical actions or scene/location transitions, but you are free to use them or not at your discretion.
• The same goes for music – I'll provide links to royalty-free/free-use selections if I suggest some kind of music, but it's never a requirement.
• Constructive criticism is always welcome.

KEY to stage directions
[Square brackets and SFX: indicate sound effects and/or the action they're meant to depict]
(Parentheses indicate tonal or other such cues for the VA)
Italics indicate a word to be emphasized
Ellipses (...) indicate a pause for emphasis. A (beat) is a slightly longer pause than that. Space between paragraphs indicates a pause for the listener's "dialogue" (or a moment of quiet between listener and speaker)
MUSIC SUGGESTION:
The YouTube channel Aim To Head has a playlist full of royalty-free music (free-to-use with credit given) that would suit the first segment of the script. I personally like the "Instinct" beat (about 50 seconds in) for this one. (Full terms of use and a download link are in the video’s description.)
– BEGIN –
[SFX: Music in background]
Okay, chat. Poll's up. Who are we raiding?
forstar90, I'm not raiding someone huge like that. Maybe I'm overthinking it, but I would feel like I'm being, like, aggressively self-promoting.
I am not that aggressive, rabbitogre. What are you talking about?
(laughs) I am the least intimidating person I know, rabbitogre.
Alright. We're raiding Renfield & Mina. There's the raid quote in the chat, and…I'll see you next time, for darksynth Saturday. Goodnight!
[SFX: music fades out]
[SFX: the sounds of a school hallway fade in, establishing the location over a few beats]
Oh. Hey, nerd. Do you want something?
What could we possibly need to talk about?
What is with you today, nerd? You're getting downright pushy.
Yeah, I know you have a name. I don't care. Nerd covers the bases, doesn't it?
Oh, I'm sure there's so much more to you, blahblahblah. Get to the point.
Rabbit…ogre?
[SFX: door opening]
(furious, panicky) Get your ass in here before someone sees us.
[SFX: door closing]
How. The. Hell. Did. You. Find. Out?
You listen to goth music? You?
I don't know. Anime theme music, maybe. Weeb stuff.
I don't know if I believe you. Name three…Nine Inch Nails songs.
Okay. That's kind of an easy one, though.
Oooh, now there's one you don't hear often.
"With-a teeth-a." (chuckles) I'm impressed….rabbit.
I'm not calling you "ogre." You get to be "rabbit." Take the blessing.
Fine. Rabbitogre. Happy?
So what is it you want from me? You want me to stop bullying you? Fine.
No? So you don't care if I keep bullying you? Maybe you like…it…EW. EW. EW. NO. NO. NO.
Oh, don't turn your nose up at me, sweetie. You'd be lucky to have me put a collar on you, and you know it.
Whatever. Just spit it out. What do you want? Blackmail? Money? Are you going to try to make me go on a date with you?
No? Well, that's good. That would be pathetic.
You have more pride than that? Coulda fooled me….
Do. Not. Tell. Me. To. Shut. Up. Just because you know about my DJ gig doesn't mean you get to be all…
I'm. Not. Yelling. I'm. Being. Emphatic.
Look, rabbitogre, I know you want something. Will you just tell me what it is?
Go on. What do you want me to tell you?
Speak up. I can't hear you.
Why do I bully you? That's what you want to know?
Because I feel like it. You invite abuse. I'm just RSVP'ing.
Keep your voice down! Are you trying to get us caught? What are you thinking?
You really are serious, aren't you? You want, like, some kind of soul-baring confession, where I tell you my sad story, learn the error of my ways, and become your dommy tsundere goth mommy girlfriend or something? Is that it?
Yes, I know what a tsundere is. Stay on topic, will ya?
Well, I'm afraid you're going to be disappointed. My parents? Sorry. No high drama here; they just don't give a shit what I do. What they don't want me to do, that's a different story, but….
No. God, no, they'd freak if they knew I was doing DJ sets on Twitch. And goth music….oh, that'd really drive them nuts.
They don't care if I go over to a friend's house twice a week, though, or even more, sometimes. They don't call her parents to see if I'm really there….which, actually, I am. That studio setup is in her family's basement.
They know I'm there, so they don't care what I'm doing. As long as I don't draw attention to myself, they leave me alone. And I'm just fine with that.
Oh, if they found out, I'm sure they'd take my phone, my computer….everything they could lay hands on. Which is why I leave my DJ deck in the studio now. My friend's parents have agreed not to rat me out. And I keep enough of a low profile that I don't have to worry about what happens at school.
Well, you're the only one I bully, and that's because I know you aren't going to make waves and draw attention to me. (sarcastically) Correction: I thought I knew. Obviously, I underestimated you. My bad.
Yes, rabbitogre, you are the only one. Feel special yet?
Like I said: You were easy to abuse. You're weird and awkward and obsessive. And you practically grovel – or used to, anyway – when I come around to put you through a little more hell.
Because…school comes easy for you. The jocks might try to bully you every now and again, but somehow, you've managed to disarm them. You can enjoy the things you like without having to worry about it. Anybody who talks shit to you, you just let it roll right off. You don't even worry about college; the scholarships are already pouring in, aren't they?
Yeah, I know you don't have any friends. But the people I hang out with? Once I'm out of here, I will probably never see most of them ever again. Even they don't know about my streams, except Jen. It’s her basement I stream from.
Because I can at least halfway talk to the people in chat. Not the people around here.
Yeah. We are alike, like that. I guess.
Don't get too happy about it, though. That's not enough to make me like you, much less….
(stifles laughter) Touche, rabbitogre. That's genuinely funny. Cruel, but funny. Even I have to laugh.
(speaker's tone starts to get gentler from here onward) I never knew you had that in you. I can respect that.
Yeah, I guess that's something else we have in common.
Well, if we're going to keep exploring that, it's your turn to share: What are your parents like? 'Coz I'm willing to bet yours care a little bit more than mine.
Benign neglect? Okay. But: "benign."
Yeah, I remember your sister. Straight from the popular-girl template, right down to the blonde hair and the class valedictorian award. So different from you that people didn't believe you were related at first.
(stifles laughter, somewhat shocked) Jesus Christ, that's dark.
No, I get that you don't wish her harm, but calling her a boilerplate true-crime victim…goddamn, sunshine. I’m stealing that one.
Yeah. That would be a tough shadow to live in. I have a cousin…don't get me started.
So…You've actually got me kind of curious, now. What did you think of the stream? I noticed you were there for most of it.
It's a memorable username, I think. I don't know. I just…noticed it, you know?
Thank you. That's…unexpectedly kind of you. I've been working on my mixing skills for a while now, but I’m still learning. I can’t practice at home the way I’d like to.
The clothes? It's like I told you: I have to stay under the radar. I can't dress like that anywhere else.
Oh, god, yes. Wearing last night's dress to school wouldn't put me on the radar, it'd put me on the damn Jumbotron.
You know, I think that's the first time I've heard you laugh.
Okay, I have another question. Now that you know about all this..
(Sighs, relieved). Thank you. I appreciate that.
The deal? What deal?
Oh. I guess I did answer your question, huh?
You know, you're really not the kind of person I thought you were.
I…really am sorry.
Yeah. There really is more to you than I gave you credit for.
Yeah. I love my community. And you seemed to fit right in with everyone last night.
You should join my Discord server. We have even more fun there.
(tentatively, but not unkindly so) I mean it. Come hang out with us.
Yeah, I guess that includes me. I'm kinda part of the deal, y'know?
(Playfully indignant) I might be tolerable, huh?
What time is it? We've been chit-chatting a lot longer than I was expecting.
Well, damn. It didn't seem like that long. But I have to go. If I'm not back home on time…
I don't usually see you around much on Fridays, but…maybe I'll see you in chat on Saturday?
You have a request? Ummm…
Huh. I don't know that one. (beat) Synthwave anime covers?
No, you know what? I will check that out. DM me a link on the Discord, though, in case I forget.
That's what I said, niveK.
You know. Ogre, from Skinny Puppy?
Seriously? Okay. I'm giving you a homework assignment: Listen to "Too Dark Park." You'll thank me.
[SFX: door handle clicks]
Sometime, you're going to have to tell me how you came up with "rabbitogre" for a handle. .
[SFX: door opens onto murmuring hallway]
(puts on a faux-menacing tone) I mean it.
(further away) Hey, Jen. (beat) You're not funny.
[SFX: fade out]

Damian Kissed his son goodnight, between the soft, fuzz-covered antennae on his forehead. Though not related by blood, He loved his adopted son like he'd fathered him. The small, Moth-like Luminar's deep, black, pupilless eyes looked up with a slight hint of fear as his father stepped over to turn off the light.
​
"Papa?"
​
The small voice inquired hesitantly, making Damian look up.
​
"Whats up Thaum?"
​
Thaum squirmed slightly in his solar-patterned comforter, a look of consternation on his small, fuzzy face.
​
"Are we *really* safe from the allied empires? We were learning about it in school today and..."
​
Damian's blood ran cold for a minute, traumatic memories from his childhood reeling in his mind. But, he put them from his head. Hearing his kid trail off, he gently walked to Thaum's bedside. Cybernetic leg hissing softly as he eased himself down onto the floor. He gently pulled his teary-eyed son into his arms and patted the delicately folded wings on his back.
​
"Hey, Chin up kid..."
​
As Thaum's four spindly arms wrapped around his torso, Damian considered his words carefully. Feeling his son start to sniffle he gently pulled him back by the shoulders and looked into his eyes.
​
"May I tell you a story Thaum?"
​
Thaum Nodded, sniffling quietly, trying to be brave for his dad. Damian, nodded, softly beginning.
​
"It starts off with a simple quote, something my father told me like I'm telling you now."
​
Damian chuckled softly and stated.
"We sleep Peacefully in our beds because rough men stand ready to do Violence on our behalf..."
...
​
Buildings burned, The sounds of terrified screams almost drowning out the cacophonic roar of plasma weaponry and over-charged slug-throwers. I Ran, I ran like I had never run before. A small, yellowish, and spherical egg wrapped in a soft blue cloth was clutched to my chest as I ran. The look on Ms. Murna's face as she pushed it into my arms still seared in my eyes. The terror, the fear... the uncertainty... But it didn't slow me down, instead it spurred me on. Forcing my burning legs and tattered, bare feet to drive into the ground even faster. I was small, I knew that, I was only ten... but I had to make sure the Thaumaturge's unhatched child made it to safety, even if I didn't.
​
A shout in a foreign language, the squeal of a plasma rifle and suddenly I was tumbling, turning in the air, and skidding painfully to a stop on my back. I looked at the egg frantically and almost breathed a sigh of relief when I saw it was undamaged.
​
Pain
​
It hit me like a speeding box-truck and I let out a scream, lifting my left leg with horror as I realized that everything from just above the knee to below, had been vaporized. Fleshy, charred tatters were all that remained. I began to cry as a hulking figure in deep purple and gold power armor marched up slowly.
​
"Please..."
​
I begged, crawling back as fear swamped my being, an arm protectively covering the egg still clutched to my chest. The figure raised their plasma rifle, muzzle still steaming from the previous shot as an armored finger curled back onto the trigger stud. A barking, muffled sound I could only describe as a laugh coming from beneath the helmet.
​
"PLEASE!!!"
​
I shouted and squeezed my eyes closed.
​
WHOOSH!, Crunch!, CRASH!
​
A wash of heat and a cacophony of noise assaulted my ears, as I protectively hugged the egg to my chest, sobbing fearfully. A gentle, warm hand touched my shoulder and I flinched away, looking up into the concerned face of a woman with short, cropped black hair and cropped urban camouflage fatigues. A small name tag simply labeled her as "Roxanne." The woman gave me a small gentle smile and looked to the side, making an urgent gesture as a man in dark armor sprinted over, a fishbowl helmet swinging from his belt as he slung a satchel onto the ground near my leg. I slowly looked over to where the power-armored Geknosian was slowly pulling themselves from the rubble of a Galacti-brick wall. the chest plate of their armor buckled inwards. Roxanne must've seen the look of pure terror on my face as she set a reassuring hand on my head and ruffled my hair.
​
"Sit back and watch kid, we'll handle it from here."
​
She stood to her full height and began marching towards the Geknosian, bringing up her fists like an old-timey boxer. There was a flash of rage on her face as she marched straight up to the discombobulated Geknosian soldier.
​
"It's about time you Genocidal lizards pick on someone your own size."
​
The words were cold, punctuated with a punch that distorted the air as it made contact, a sonic boom rattling my teeth as the Geknosian was slung back through the building and out of sight. Roxanne followed close behind, tearing brick walls down with her bare hands as she pursued the soldier.
​
My mouth hung open in shock and awe. A new image burned forever into my mind.
​
One of a Dark-haired, Fatigue-clad woman winding up for a brutal jab at an opponent twice her size.
​
"That's Roxxie for ya kid... Warmongers... a rough bunch aren't they?"
​
The medic offered jokingly as he applied a quick-set medi-gel to my stump. I remembered then, the words that my father had always told me.
​
"Rough men stand ready..."
​
The medic chuckled softly.
​
"That we do."
​
...
​
Thaum looked up at his Dad in wide-eyed wonder as Damian gently got to his feet and opened the curtains to reveal a brightly lit street, the window auto-darkening to Thaum's taste. He gestured at the young-looking man with an M40 carbine who stood like a sentinel on the street corner, a small gaggle of human children playing a game where they'd try and stick a magnet to his back without him noticing. Even though the Warmonger was facing away, Damian knew there was a soft smile on the man's face.
​
"Thaum, I'll make you the same promise Roxanne made me. If you're ever in danger, Just shout for help... and no matter what, no matter where, Rough men will rush to your side to do violence on your behalf. Because that's what Warmongers do..."
​
Damian slowly closed the blinds, looking over and realizing that Thaum had fallen into a peaceful slumber, he chuckled softly and snuck to the door whispering.
​
"They stand Ready."

With full credit to u/Smiling-Otter for their brilliant AAR writeups, the format of which I have shamelessly stolen. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery!
Background

• Anton Rayne was born to a wealthy family in Lachaven. 

“Ah yes, the old ‘champagne socialist’ line. Did you know they coined that phrase to refer to me? Because of my father’s vineyard. True story*. Anyway, I don’t see the problem with it. Socialism isn’t about drinking victory gin out of rusty tin cans. Socialism just means that everyone gets a sip of the champagne.”
Interview with Good Morning Sordland, Anton Rayne, 1969
*The term ‘champagne socialist’ was first recorded in 1912, when Rayne was 4 years old.

• He studied economics at Lachaven business school. 

“You wouldn’t think it, but Anton was quite conventional in his views back then. Couldn’t finish an essay to save his life, but he somehow got permission to make a verbal presentation instead of sitting any exams. I’m sure it was the only way that he graduated. If he’d started banging on about Valgsland, there’s no way he’d have survived.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• He joined a student council, and met Monica, who would become his wife. 

“I always felt so safe around Anton. To be honest, I thought he would be one of those lifelong bachelors. But one night after he walked me back to my dorm and said goodnight he came charging back to knock on my door again. Apparently he’d been planning to kiss me, but had got so caught up in talking politics that he forgot. Fortunately I always found that charming.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973

• He joined the Red Youth and actively protested the coup. 

“No, we never met back in those days. I was out of the country, if you recall. But we shared a few friends in common. Apparently he was very keen on protesting, but got bogged down in pedantic arguments the second anyone brought up theory.”
Interview with The Radical, Dennis Stahler, 1960

• Anton obeyed orders, somehow surviving his military service. 

“At first I couldn’t understand why my husband, who hated authority so much, had such a hard time saying no to Iosef. Then I saw a picture of Anton’s father for the first time and realised that the two of them looked almost identical. Poor Anton. I don’t think he ever worked it out.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973

• He joined the USP, campaigning first for Soll and then for Alphonso, sacrificing his family life in the process. 

“Of course, Anton was a mess back in those days. Couldn’t keep his diary in order, always late for committee meetings, wouldn’t even make dinner engagements with his wife. But he was so charismatic, he ended up being loaned out to other departments to do their public speaking engagements. Plus, if you could be the last person to talk to him, you could convince him of almost anything. I’m pretty sure that’s why he was allowed to become party leader. Everyone thought he was still that same young man they could manipulate. How wrong they were.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• Rayne privately advised Alphonso to step down, and was selected as the next leader of the USP. 

“No, I don’t blame Anton at all. It’s Galade. That man has all the charisma of a brick, he wouldn’t win an election to a parish council. So he’s stuck his hand up Rayne’s arse and turned him into a glove puppet with a smile drawn on it. You mark my words, we’re going back to the days of Soll, only this time the real power’s going to be with the Grand Vizier.”
Recording of Ewald Alphonso in private conversation with Gus Manger, 1953
Chapter 1: 1954

• Anton Rayne campaigned on a strong statist economy, liberal immigration, an alignment to the East, and a focus on Healthcare. 

“I’m sorry to tell you all, but you’ve been lied to. The Oligarchs said that they would put food on your table, but they’ve given you nothing but the scraps from their own obscene banquets! The Nationalists said that they would preserve our values, but all they seem to value is making the poor of all nations fight for their amusement! Arcasia promised that they would put money in your pocket, right up until the point where they realised they couldn’t turn us into puppets and lost interest! Do you know what the truth is? Sordland is sick and starving! You wait weeks to see a doctor and when you get to his office, he’s almost as unwell as you! The only people who will restore the health of this nation and its people are the USP!”
Campaign speech, Anton Rayne, 1953

• He promised full constitutional reform. 

“Hey Lucian. Do you want to give Tarquin Soll a heart attack? Because I think I want to give Tarquin Soll a heart attack.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Lucian Galade, 1954

• The Campaign Finance Bill was vetoed. 

“Up until that moment I hadn’t realised that he was truly able to stand up for himself. I was astonished that he had defied the Assembly. But when I asked him why, he looked so surprised. ‘Because it’s not fair, Petr,’ he said. That was the moment I knew that the Old Guard had bitten off more than they could chew.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• The H-3 Highway was built. 

“Come on, Anton, tell the truth. You’re only building the highway because it goes east, aren’t you?”
“The thing is, Petr? You’re kind of right. Just not for the reason you think. Trust me, I’ve got a plan.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Petr Vectern, 1954

• Rayne invested in Armadine Industries, rejected a deal with Marcel Koronti, and accepted a bribe from Walter Tusk. 

“I fucked up. No, scratch that. Did I? I think I did. Just dropped all that money on a hot tip from Gus, feeling the pinch a little, and then the Toad comes in with his fat cigar. Disgusting man. But I let him get into my head. It was easy to tell the Slug to piss off, I never liked him or his father. Always reminded me of one of those priests you don’t let alone with the choirboys. But the Toad? He was so fucking smug, so self-satisfied, I ended up taking his money just to spit in his face later, just to prove I was smarter than him. God damn it, Anton. If anyone finds out about this, you’re toast.”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1954

• He distributed stimulus cheques to the public. 

“Come on, Gus. You’re all about free markets, right? Well how better to see markets in action than to let the invisible hand decide who to bail out?”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Gus Manger, 1954

• Rayne attended the funeral of Bernard Circas. 

“My father always liked Uncle Anton. Mother always said that my father saw potential in him. That he just needed the right people around him and he would become the man this country needed. I think that on that day, he showed us all that my father was right.”
“Our Songs Will Be Sung”, Claire Circas, 1975

• He refused to close the consulate in Dome, seeking a diplomatic resolution. 

“The importance of Anton Rayne’s actions as President cannot be overstated in this case. There is a version of history where the Sordland under Rayne is remembered as a failed state that found out the hard way that nice words cannot prevent conquest. There is a version of history where Rumburg and Sordland were plunged into a brutal war that might have dragged on for years. Instead we live in a world where Anton Rayne, through diplomacy and media management, pulled the fangs from the Rumish army before any shots could be fired.”
“The War That Never Was: A History Of The Sordland-Rumburg Conflicts, 1954-56”, Konrad Weisz, 1984

• He vetoed the Tourism Act. 

“Not part of the plan.”
Note written next to the Veto stamp on the original copy of the Tourism Act, Anton Rayne, 1954

• Rayne created a trust to provide for his driver’s children. 

“Yes, I did find out eventually. There was a letter that Uncle Anton wrote to be delivered to me when I turned 18. He told me where the money had come from, that this was an attempt to salve his conscience for taking a bribe. My father made me swear never to tell anyone, told me that Anton was a great man, that he must have had good reasons for what he did. I love my father dearly, but if Anton Rayne had pulled out a gun and shot him, my father’s dying words would have been to praise his marksmanship.”
Georg Anton Wolkner, quoted in ‘The Dirt On The Gardener’s Hands’, special edition of The Radical, 1981

• He invested alone in Gasom, negotiated for better conditions for workers, and talked down the protestors at the gates. 

“There was something about Anton that always charmed me. He was like a teenager, all fire and optimism and deeply-held principles that could probably be softened with the right pitch. But in this case, he’s the one who talked me around. ‘Invest in human capital’, he said. ‘Create the right incentive structures and you’ll maximise output from your employees.’ Then he walked out to the gates and did his best impression of Malenyev. Honestly, he should have been on the stage.”
“To The Palace And Back”, Ewald Alphonso, 1966

• Rayne refused to ban any youth organisations. 

“It seemed like a surprising act of tolerance for Anton, who hated the Young Sords with a passion. Was he softening his stance? As it happens, when I asked why he had refused to ban them, he told me that it wouldn’t work. ‘Half the police in this country were Young Sords anyway. They’d probably discover that the Young Sords had been replaced by random Bluds they found walking down the street.’ He tried to work that line into speeches for years afterwards. It was all me and Lucian could do to stop him.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973

• He vetoed the GREEN Act 

“Also not part of the plan.”
Note written next to the Veto stamp on the original copy of the GREEN Act, Anton Rayne, 1954

• Rayne agreed to significant constitutional reforms, limiting vetoes, removing the Supreme Court’s voting rights, allowing the GNA and the Supreme Court together to impeach the President, requiring minsters to be confirmed by the GNA, decreasing the electoral threshold to 8%, introducing term limits, allowing justices to be impeached by the GNA, and abolishing the Member of Honour position. 

“So you’re actually doing it, then? Going after Soll?”
“Probably not.”
“So why-”
“It’s a distraction. Let them save the Colonel, and they might overlook the whole, you know, revolution thing I’m doing.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Petr Vectern, 1954

• He increased the EPA to 49%. 

“I wish I didn’t need the money, but it’s fine. We’ll get it back later. We just need to make sure that none of the oligarchs can get their grubby little paws on it. In other news, it was probably a bad idea to eat rice with pasta just because the Toad said I shouldn’t. I should get Livia to order me some prune juice.”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1954

• Rayne increased the funding of every ministry except the Military, which he defunded. 

“Sometimes mine and Lucian’s job was to keep Anton from panicking. We drilled him for days to be able to tell Iosef that he was cutting funding to the army. He wasn’t scared of a coup, you understand, even though he really should have been. He was just scared that Iosef would get angry with him.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973
Chapter 2: 1955

• The Worker’s Rights Act was signed into law. 

“We don’t work for the good of our health. We don’t work because it makes us better people. We work to feed and clothe our families. We all deserve to be able to do that without worrying that we’re going to come home with fewer limbs than we started with.”
Speech to the Labour Union of Sordland, Anton Rayne, 1955

• The Anti-Corruption Police was founded and directed to pursue the Old Guard. 

“I know that the Old Guard are a bit of a conspiracy theory, but-”
“Oh, they definitely exist, Mister President.”
“Oh. Well. I expected this to be a lot harder. Are you sure you don’t need convincing? I had quite a speech planned.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Karl Greiser, 1955

• Rayne raised taxes on big business and issued cuts for small and medium businesses. 

“Funny story, if they capped the pay for their executives, they would barely feel a hit in their profits. But I suppose that’s a little too much to ask, eh?”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1955

• He modernised the curriculum and kept schools under state control. 

“I swear – no, is it that? I swear to – something about dying for my country? My life and death for Sordland? I swear to stick my thumb up my arsehole and form the arch of honour, in the name of the immortal Colonel Soll! Fucking stupid. Who even cares about this shit?”
Recording of Anton Rayne privately monologuing to himself in his office, 1955

• He refused to invest in developing Gruni. 

“He told me that whatever we could put in was small potatoes next to the big foreign investors he had lined up right around the corner. Up-to-the-minute agricultural technology, specialist consultants, the whole works. I walked out of there ready to tell the people of Gruni that Rayne was their saviour. The thing is? He was lying. Didn’t have anything arranged. He was just betting that he could get the CSP to bail him out before Iosef had him shot.”
Interview with The Ekonomists, Gus Manger, 1960

• Rayne amended his constitutional plans to keep Soll’s Member of Honour position, and cancelled his wife’s speaking engagement at the Benfi Festival. 

“Funnily enough, the thing that led to me and Gloria Tory actually respecting one another was when she sabotaged the first step in my political career. She called me before Anton got home and said that he had agreed, however reluctantly, to give me spot at the Benfi Festival back to Curtan Leste. ‘It’s nothing personal,’ she said. ‘But do not let him wriggle out of this. He told me he’d be sleeping on the couch for a week, so do try to keep him honest about that.’ Gloria always respected a woman who could manage her husband properly. Although I only managed five days before forgiving him.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973

• He promised to make Albin Clavin his VP in exchange for his support. 

“He laughed when I asked for that, you know. Said that I should have asked for more, that Petr was planning to step down soon, that he was already going to call me as soon as the news became public. All lies, every word of it. The thing is? I think he made himself believe it. Anton Rayne told everyone else the truth, but in order to do that he lied to himself constantly.”
Albin Clavin quoted in ‘The Dirt On The Gardener’s Hands’, special edition of The Radical, 1981

• The Religious Harmony Bill was vetoed. 

“Fucking Kibener. Brought fucking cameras with him when he presented the Bill to me. Stared me right in the eye as I brought the stamp down. He knew it would never pass. I bet half the people who voted for it knew that I wouldn’t accept it. They just wanted to make me reject it publicly, so they could go out and make speeches about me being on the side of the BFF. Fucking goons.”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1955

• Rayne accepted aid from the CSP. 

“Sometimes Anton was very smooth. Sometimes he would do things like walking up to the Ambassador from United Contana during a drinks reception and asking him to pass on a begging letter to Malenyev. Okay, he didn’t do that exactly, but I was there, and it wasn’t much more subtle than that.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• He kept immigration relaxed. 

“Of course it’s not just to piss off Kibener. But it’s a little bit to piss off Kibener.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Lucian Galade, 1955

• Monica received her husband’s support in her argument with Curtan Leste. 

“Truly, Curtan Leste was one of the biggest boons the campaign for equal rights could have asked for. Without him we would never have got as far as we did. Ciara once told me, ‘A movement can survive without a God, but it won’t get far without a Devil.’ So thankyou, Curtan Leste. You were the best Devil we could have hoped for.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973

• The President supported reform of the military, including the abolition of conscription. 

“Iosef, you were the best commanding officer a young man could have hoped for. You knew every soldier you commanded. And you know that most of us, myself included, should never have been there. If war had actually come, it would have been a massacre. We can’t let any more of our children go off to die senselessly. Never again.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Iosef Lancea, 1955

• Rayne accepted a less advantageous trade deal with Agnolia. 

“Yes. Sorry, I know it’s not much of an answer, but yes, this deal is worse for us than the last one. I would apologise, but I think we all need to be realists here. There was nothing we could have done to get a better deal than this*. We got as much as we could for as long as we could, now the balance of power has changed. But if you look at these slides, you will see a pleasing synergy with the H-3 Highway that I have no doubt will put a few smiles on those faces…”
Speech before the Greater Holsord Business Council, Anton Rayne, 1955
*It would later leak that Rayne had known about the possibility of securing a better deal by recognising Heljiland as Agnolian, but had opted to go for a worse deal instead.

• Sordland closed its borders to Bludish refugees during Operation Bear Trap in order to secure a trade deal. 

“Don’t think A likes the taste of Realpolitik. Coached him through the visit. He did all the right things. Didn’t make a fuss in front of Smolak. Got him back on the plane, and as soon as the door was closed he instantly vomited on the floor. I wish I still had enough of a heart to feel as bad as he does for what we just did.”
Extract from the private diary of Deivid Wisci, 1955

• Rayne invested in the Sarna Agricultural Zone. 

“Gus, I don’t understand what you want from me. First you want investment in Gruni, then when I get us a big investment from the CSP you get angry? You want to stand up for rural farming communities, but I put money into Sarna and you get upset that I’m spending on the wrong farmers? Gus, all I do is what you tell me, and you still get mad! You need to give me a clue here, you’re worse than Monica sometimes!”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Gus Manger, 1955

• He initially supported the Bergia Semi-Autononous Zone. 

“Anton always got very quiet when we discussed Bergia. He never talked to me about his national service, but I know it weighed heavily on him. Whatever happened, he decided that he was going to make up for it. Would he have supported a free Bludia? I honestly don’t know. If they joined the CSP, maybe.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• The Central Bank Reinforcement Act was signed. 

“What’s that, Miss Agnoc? A little bit of extra state power over the economy*? As a treat? Don’t mind if I do!”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1955
*The Central Bank was and remains a quasi-autonomous non-governmental institution that is not under direct state control.

• Rural healthcare was prioritised, and the system was kept under state control. 

“I’ve quit smoking since I became President. I should have quit years ago. And you know what? Even quitting smoking hasn’t done as much for my lungs as clean country air. Think about it! You’ll make more money, spend less because everything’s cheaper outside the big cities, and enjoy better health yourselves. Doesn’t that sound like a good deal to you?”
Speech before the Sordish Medical Council, Anton Rayne, 1955

• Rayne made a statement with the PFJP condemning Articles 6 and 7 of the constitution. 

“It’s a good start.”
Press release, Ishval Ersen, 1955
Chapter 3: 1956

• The President conspired to nationalise major industries. 

“Come on, Lucian. Koronti can’t smear me in the papers if he doesn’t own them any more. And Tusk’s just a fat old toad. What are they going to do, shoot me?”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Lucian Galade, 1956

• The Unified Education Language Bill was vetoed. 

“Hello Kibener. No, I’m still not racist. Yes, you’re still racist. No, there is no common ground. Goodbye, Kibener. Rot in hell, and take your shitty little moustache with you.”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1956

• Rayne met with Bludish leaders and made a deal to amend articles 6 and 7 of the constitution. 

“Of all Anton’s episodes of wishful thinking, that was without a doubt the strongest. ‘The Bludish community have turned their back on the BFF,’ he told me. ‘They’ve rejected them! This is it, Petr. Conservatives, liberals, Sords, Bluds, this is the one thing I can do that nobody can complain about!’ He was always looking for that win-win situation. He never did find it.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• Rayne agreed to arrest Fetih Ejall and reintegrate Bergia into Sordland as a whole in order to pass his constitutional reforms. This succeeded, though some in his own party still voted against the motion. 

“Out of all the successes, that was the first one that really hit home for him. He was a wreck by the time he got home. I just had to hold him, he was shaking so hard from the adrenaline. He told me later that he hadn’t felt anything that intense since the days of the civil war, which I tried not to take personally. But it was a big day for both of us. For the first time it felt like we really had a chance of doing something that couldn’t be taken back.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973

• He agreed to take in a whistleblower from Rumburg. 

“We will of course be happy to return this alleged criminal to Rumburg in line with our international obligations, so long as the government can provide us with concrete evidence of what they have actually done wrong.”
Press release, Anton Rayne, 1956

• Rayne sent his son to university in United Contana, and opened negotiations with Valgsland. 

“It’s such a funny thing. He sent me on my way and told me that I was my own man now, and not to try to follow his example. I suppose I never went into the GNA like he did, but our politics ended up aligning. Although I was never quite as comfortable with luxury as my father was. I’ve nothing against champagne socialism, but someone else can have my share of the bubbly, thanks!”
Interview with Dr Franc Rayne, newly-elected head of the Sordish Medical Council, Journal of the SMC, 1981

• He convinced Heron Garcai and Isabel Edmonds to support his constitutional reforms. 

“Anton was so buoyant when he came back from dinner with Isabel. He kept going on and on about how much he loved the dinner, and how delicious the salad was. I pointed out that he hated salad, had never voluntarily eaten salad, that his doctor had told him to consider getting more vegetables into his diet and he had promptly changed doctors. He just stared at me as if I’d started talking Xinan. That was Anton. Always the man he needed to be in the moment.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973

• The constitutional reforms passed the Supreme Court with 7 votes. 

“This is not a victory for me, not for the USP, not the Grand National Assembly, but for every citizen of Sordland who loves freedom! The future is now!”
Speech to a rally of democratic activists, Anton Rayne 1956

• Rayne decided to shift the manifesto of the USP to be explicitly Socialist. 

“This is suicide. Political suicide.”
“Counterpoint: you are often wrong.”
“Anton, there is already a Communist party in Sordland. I don’t think we need another.”
“Nor do I. So give it a year or two to clean out the closet and we’ll see which party Dennis and his voters are calling home.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Petr Vectern, 1956

• The machinery of the state was mobilised against the Old Guard while Rayne worked with Lileas Graf to take down the BFF. 

“Fetih will be out of prison in no time. It’s minimum security, practically a hotel*. Trust me, he’ll come home and find that we’ve cleaned house for him. All the murderous old bastards gone, everyone ready to walk forward to freedom together. Trust me.”
Recording of a private phone call between Anton Rayne and Mansoun Leke, 1956
*Fetih Ejall was in fact transported to Antel Rock, a notorious high-security prison with a worrying record of human rights abuses.

• Ovid Grecer was appointed to the Supreme Court and became the Chief Justice after Hawker’s arrest. 

“Look, I don’t know what you think I promised you, but in case you hadn’t noticed, I don’t appoint the Chief Justice. Maybe you should have focused on schmoozing your colleagues instead of talking to me?”
Recording of a private phone call between Anton Rayne and Heron Garcai, 1956

• Rayne instituted VAT, created the Fair Trade and Competition Commission, and formed the Sordish Radio and Television Supreme Council. 

“We don’t need to control the media, Lucian. A neutral media will always work out in our favour, because we’re good at our jobs and our policies work. Come on, I shouldn’t have to tell you this!”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Lucian Galade, 1956

• Sordland formed an economic and military alliance with Valgsland, acknowledging Heljiland as Valgish. 

“Rayne continued to deny Sordish involvement in the fighting in Heljiland to the bitter end. On international television, he claimed that because no Sordish soldier had stepped onto the island that we were simply friendly observers. Luckily for his public standing, few in Sordland cared about Heljiland so long as none of their friends or family died there, and the international community was far too bogged down in ideological disputes to worry about one man’s lies.”
‘The Dirt On The Gardener’s Hands’, special edition of The Radical, 1981

• Rayne revealed Petr’s affair to Lucian Galade and ordered an investigation into Livia Suno. 

“God damn it, Petr. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. You were the heartbreaker, you were the one who seduced everyone, you weren’t supposed to be the one who got used! God damn it. Do you remember flirting with old ladies to get them to donate to our campaign funds? I doubt it. You never remembered any of the women at university. You don’t even remember… well, why would you? You were drunk. Just a fumble in the dark because you couldn’t find a girl with low enough standards to fall for your cheesy lines. Only reason you ever agreed to try… God damn it. I’m too fucking drunk. I’m getting maudlin. I should wipe this. Remember to wipe this tape in the morning, Anton. Now go to bed.”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1956

• Livia Suno was exposed as a spy and arrested. Anton attempted to take the blame, but Petr Vectern dramatically resigned at the last minute. 

“There it was. The come-to-Dast moment. My entire life flashing before my eyes. My wife, a better woman than I had any right to call my own, gone. My career in tatters, what little credibility I once possessed flushed down the toilet. My best friend, the man who had somehow dragged my whisky-sodden carcass with him to the Maroon Palace itself, ready to burn his life to the ground just to keep me from the consequences of my own actions. I had to make a choice on that day. Do I let Anton do what he always did and cover for me, or do I actually take responsibility for once in my messed-up life? The funny thing is, when I grabbed the microphone and started spilling my guts for the world to see, I wasn’t thinking about any of that. All I could think was, ‘I really hope this doesn’t hurt our polling numbers too much’.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• Rayne agreed to form the Women’s Rights Commission, and donated to the Sordish League of Women. 

“I love my husband. I adore him with all my heart. His smile fills me with joy, and my heart drops when he is sad. But I stand here today not because I am a wife, or a mother, but because I am a woman, and there are some problems that affect every woman, regardless of race, creed or class. We do not ask for special treatment. We do not ask to turn the world upside-down. We only ask for the freedom that everyone should have: to live the lives that we choose in the way that we choose. Because I promise you, to everyone who fears the end of the family and the death of motherhood, if you give us the choice we will still choose love, and choose it every time.”
Speech given to the Sordish League of Women, Monica Rayne, 1956

• Lucian Galade became the new Vice President. 

“I knew it! I knew this was going to happen. Just you wait, give it a year and there’s going to be another scandal and Rayne’s going to be gone and that devious little shit is going to be in the Maroon Palace without ever winning an election!”
Recording of a private phone call between Ewald Alphonso and Gus Manger, 1956

• The Gendarmerie was left in the hands of the military. 

“OG planning power grab, be careful.”
Handwritten note delivered to Anton Rayne before meeting with Iosef Lancea and Lileas Graf, 1956

• Mandatory Vaccinations were introduced. 

“Not only does Anton Rayne believe that you cannot be trusted with how to take care of your own family’s health, the so-called ‘vaccine’ he wishes you to take is based on a formula developed in United Contana! Coincidence? I think not!”
Speech delivered to an anti-vaccination rally by Kesaro Kibener, 1956

• Rayne attended the Aschraf Anniversary. 

“I thought that I was well out of the political sphere, drying out in a private hospital in Gruni and trying to get my life together, when I was told that I had a phone call from Monica Rayne. I staggered down to the reception, convinced that some kind of crisis was underway. As it happens, it was just Anton doing more of his nonsense. ‘He’s convinced that he’s going to give a speech in Bludish, Petr,” Monica said. ‘Talk him out of it before he makes a fool of himself in front of the entire Bludish population of Bergia.’”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970
Chapter 3: 1957

• The Women’s Rights Act was signed into law. 

“So here’s what we’re going to do: I go up to make the speech, then I say that it’s not appropriate for me to speak and ask Gloria to come up and speak instead. She acts surprised and tries to say no, but Monica insists and the two of them make a moving speech together. The press will eat it up.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Lucian Galade, 1957

• The Children For the Future Act was signed into law. 

“Honestly, I’m just surprised that this isn’t a thing we were doing already.”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1957

• The Human Dignity Bill was vetoed. 

“Anton was quite naive about the realities of prostitution. He honestly asked me if we had looked into the idea of some kind of union for the sex trade. When I explained to him that most women working as prostitutes are driven by poverty and desperation, using sex as a means of survival rather than as a career, he looked confused. ‘Isn’t that the same as most jobs?’ I had to distract him from that line of thinking before he could start having more ideas for controversial speeches.”
“First Lady”, Monica Rayne, 1973

• The Minority Rights Act was signed into law by decree. 

“Anton, I say this with love, but if you ever try to speak Bludish to me again, I will kill you and then myself.”
Recording of Mansoun Leke in private conversation with Anton Rayne, 1957

• Taxes were raised on Alcohol and Luxury Goods. 

“Look, I don’t know what you’re so upset about. I’m the rich guy with a vineyard, I stand to lose far more than you!”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Gus Manger, 1957

• Rayne responded with diplomacy to the downing of a Sordish plane, and held a military parade. 

“The second call I got while I was in hospital was just as stupid as the first. I’d heard that our broken-down old army was being dragged out to embarrass itself on the world stage, that was ridiculous enough already, but the cherry on top was that Anton had bought himself one of those ridiculous furry Contanan hats that he was determined to wear. Once again, Monica dragged me in to persuade him that nobody wanted to see his knock-off Malenyev costume.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• Sordland joined the CSP after a state visit by Leon ‘Malenyev’ Chavatangakwunua. 

“No, as it happens, this was not ‘always my plan’*. Do you want to know who persuaded me? Iosef. ‘We need allies,’ he said, so I went and got allies. Just because I’m sympathetic to the cause of Socialism doesn’t make me a rabid CSP defender.”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Lileas Graf, 1957
*Statements made by Emmerich Hegel reveal that Rayne had been enquiring about the possibility of joining the CSP since mid-way through 1954.

• Rumburg was sanctioned by the AN and expelled from OMEC after a diplomatic offensive by Anton Rayne. 

“It’s a shame, really. Queen Beatrice is a terrible person, but I always thought there was a certain romantic charm to the monarchy. Like looking back and seeing how people used to live in the past. I’m sure she’d do a lot better as a tourist attraction than as a ruler.”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1956

• Lileas Graf was arrested for conspiring to murder Bernard Circas. 

“Uncle Anton called us the day before the arrest was made, and offered to bring us to the USP conference to witness the arrest. Ridiculous. Even contacting us was a security risk, considering what he already knew about the Old Guard. But he genuinely cared. He wanted to give us that closure. We refused, but it was a nice idea.”
“Our Songs Will Be Sung”, Claire Circas, 1975

• Gus Manger and Symon Holl resigned from the cabinet. 

“Who the fuck is Symon Holl?”
Recording of Anton Rayne in private conversation with Lucian Galade, 1957

• Rayne promised to focus on education in his next term. 

“No, it’s not propaganda, actually. If you look into the history, these educational reforms were instituted before the revolution in Valgsland. It was actually the increased rates of literacy and critical thinking in the general population that led to their resistance to their crumbling monarchy. True story*. Are you telling me that the Kingdom of Valgos was spreading Socialist propaganda?”
Interview with the Holsord Post, Anton Rayne, 1957
*The educational reforms championed by Rayne and Ciara Walda were specifically designed by Socialist educational theorists in Valgsland over a decade after the revolution.

• He advocated for a Universal Wage during the Presidential Debate. 

“I laughed when I saw that, because I knew that somewhere out there, Lucian was tearing his hair out. He said it so smoothly, but I knew that there was no way Anton had planned that. He just wanted to annoy Kibener and impress Leke, so he made something up.”
“Mistakes Were Made: My Life In Politics”, Petr Vectern, 1970

• Rayne was shot by a sniper during a rally, but survived. 

“They tried to kill me. They tried to kill me because they are afraid! Afraid of the change we are already bringing to this country! An assassin’s bullet almost ended my life, but even if I had died, the people cannot be stopped! We are not a movement, we are a revolution, and the revolution is bulletproof!”
Campaign stump speech, Anton Rayne, 1957

• The USP won the general election, with the NFP coming second. 

“So I have to look at Kibener’s stupid fucking face every time I go into the GNA. Or watch the news. Or read the papers. Fucking hell. I wish I’d fucking retired. Monica was right. Well, only one more term, then I’m done. I’ll have earned my retirement after all this. One more term, then no more politics. I promise*.”
Tape recorded diary entry, Anton Rayne, 1957
*Anton Rayne remained an active figure in Sordish politics for the rest of his life.

Day -1 - Wednesday
Wednesday I arrived on the last shuttle from the airport to the event. When we arrived it was after dark (expected on my end) when we got on the internal site people mover (trying to define things differently in hopes to make it more clear, something I feel the festival should have done.) I was supposed to be in "Walk In Camping" when I told the driver this I was dropped off at preset camping (something you purchase where your campsite is already set up for you) I then asked the "camp hosts" where walk in camping was and they also insisted I was in preset camping until they couldn't find my name on their list and realized I hadn't paid for it and then couldn't direct me where to go waving heir hand vaguely in the direction we had come from on a dark road and said "that way." By this time it was 10:30pm.
I again hopped on the internal people mover and again explained I didn't have a vehicle and need the area where people would just be setting up tents and not camping directly next to their vehicles. I has dropped in an area called "Hillside Car Camping" when I again questioned this I was told to "figure it out" and left there.
I set up my tent and began my search for water (mind you I flew in and the shuttle did not make a supply stop, so everything I had had to come with me on the plane.) I brought 3 water bottles and a fillable collapsible 1 gallon water jug. I gathered all of these to go to the water station and fill them up to bring back to camp and expected to do this at least once a day since they would have water in the music area as well.
This is when I learned the map was useless. They didn't mark any roads or walkpaths on the map. I asked roughly 6 staff members at different points along the way where the water station was and no one could tell me. It was a 30 minute walk over hilly terrain (that I would later come to find out had no shade the entire way durring the day. I eventually reach the water station fill up and return to camp for a Goodnight rest.
Day 0 - Thursday
Thursday morning I wake up and begin to try and explore a bit to get better bearings and again see if I can use the map provided to get to where I wanted to go (This time the glamping area to meet a friend). I walked for over an hour through backstage and Artist and Vendor camping all the way to the commissary without security stopping me a single time and still wasn't able to figure out where I wanted to go so returned the way I had come.
I used up most of my water and again made the 30 minute hike to water (this is the point I realized there was no shade the entire way).
This is when I decided I was packing up and moving camp (an event that would take me the rest of the day and 3 trips and caused a very mild case of heat stroke). I had met some people online in a chat group and determined they were closest and they welcomed me into their camp (later we would find was a reconnection from another festival long passed).
I was now a 10 minute walk from water.
That night we went to the Thursday Pre-Party with Daily Bread. It was amazing and really fun but we did notice stages were still in the process of being built and the entire time they were running trucks, heavy equipment, and emergency vehicles through the crowd (I could be mistaken but in the 60 or so fests I have been to they always have emergency lanes backstage so they don't have to drive through the crowd, all around safer for all involved).
Day 1 - Friday
Friday was a very nice day, weather wasn't too hot. We walked down to the gorgeous quarry to take a swim. Stages were still not finished. Music that night was amazing. Really no complaints other then them still running traffic through the crowds.
Day 2 - Saturday
Pretty much the same as Friday, I also took an amazing Shower at the Europa Showers (shout ot to that crew for being awesome!) Really one of the best shower expierences I have ever had. Music was great no real complaints except again the traffic through the crowd.
Day 3 - Sunday
Sunday we camped out ath the Eclipse stage because every artist we wanted to see was playing on that stage. We had an amazing time right up until the Tipper crowd appeared. We were right next to ADA and we had a campmate who had just had a major surgery and was sitting in his air couch and a few friends who have really bad anxiety. The crowd was so rude to us for taking up space we needed to make sure we were comfortable. We were there for over 9 hours and had no issue until the Tipper crowd tried to trapple us and a few friends had panic attacks.
This is the time I went to get water for my entire group. I get to the water station and it isnt working. I walk to the next water station that also isn't working. I go to the Med tent to tell someone and I was told they had broke a water mainline and all water on the site was shutdown but they had been working to fix it for over 45 minutes (something that took over an hour to fix) when I returned to the water station I began telling other the situation. Eventually I was approached by what I can only assume was an employee (high vis vest, dark clothes, looked overworked, again I have been around the block a few times) who asked me where I heard that and I said "I was told that" and he huffed and said "Great, really appreciate that." The rest of the evening went pretty smooth.
Day 4 - Monday
I awake Monday at 9 am to go hear some talks out in the Earth Village when we hear other festival goers saying everything was canceled due to weather. We were extremely let down to say the least. We had 1 camp mate who really only came to see LSDream and Clozee. We begin to pack down but hear the line to leave was being quoted at 6 hrs to just get off the property. So we slowed down and took a load off ate breakfast and determined to watch the eclipse from camp.
I had been to Oregon in 2017 and the ring of fire still never ceases to amaze me. We packed up and left right as the sun was setting. Then took us less then an hour to get off the property.
I was supposed to take the shuttle back to the airport but my flight didn't leave until Tuesday (today) and the shuttles were just dropping people off at the Austin Transportation Center without any way to get to the airport. I was lucky my friends had space for me at their home because there were no hotels available in Austin.
Now
Overall I did have a lot of fun. I knew to expect a sh!t show after being at OE and having been around the block. I do believe they should have done a better job making sure staff new the lay of the land. I also wish that they had chosen better diction to describe camping areas and make things more clear (preset vs walk in etc.). Running traffic through the crowd is a festival no no to me. They 100% needed more water stations and even said they were planning more right before the decision to cancel.
I will be disputing the shuttle charge with my CC company because dropping people of a day early and with no way to get to the airport when you said you would/could is a breach of contract. I will also be keeping an eye our for this particular refund before making any more decisions regarding that.

My girlfriend of 14 months broke up with me 2 days ago. We just celebrated my birthday at Universal and Disney 2 weeks ago and were supposed to move in together at the end of this month. My insecurities and trust issues came up a couple of times during our relationship. As a majority of relationships start off we initially couldn’t keep our hands off each other and sex / intimacy was never an issue. 4 months ago I went through her phone after she seemed annoyed and said “ugh that’s enough you’re doing too much” at my attempt of giving her random kisses and hugs. I found myself looking for signs of cheating but there were none.
But I didn’t stop there, I looked through many previous conversations she had with guys from before we were together and saw how sexual she was talking with them or how she did certain acts with them that we haven’t done and it fueled my insecurities. I thought wow am I not good enough, big enough is it that the excitement from a new person made her be more open to things and that she was getting bored of just having me after the variety of the past. I was so surprised at some of them and how many there were that I couldn’t sleep that night and the next day I told her what I did. She didn’t get upset and we talked it out right away. She said I don’t know why you did that I’ve never given you a reason to do that and when you’re single those things are part of the game. And as far as the reaction to my affection she said it’s something she’s struggled with in all of her relationships and doesn’t know why. I believed her and started going to therapy right after this but I still had my doubts so basically every weekend she would come over I’d continue to go through her phone and 2.5 months ago I made the worst decision of my life and installed a GPS tracker in her car.
We always started our day with a good morning how’d you sleep, texted throughout the day even at work and we established communication to keep each other updated on when we were leaving work and going home and if we were making other stops etc. Up until 3 days ago everytime she said she was going to work or leaving work getting home even stopping at the store she was always telling the truth which I would confirm with the tracker. This Friday (yesterday we were supposed to go to her house and pack a few things and movers were coming next weekend to bring a few items to the new apartment).
Three days ago she’s texted me she’s leaving work and 30 mins later that she’s home. An hour later she’s saying how she’s still dealing with work at home which is normal for her job. Her text messages turn green but she says it must be on my end because the texts to the person for work are blue. This has happened plenty of times before so I don’t think anything of it until I check the tracker and it shows her at a sports bar across the street from her apartment.
My heart sinks and because of the negative emotions from the last few months of me doubting her I panic. I ask her how the work things are going and she says she’s still dealing with them. I try to call her she says babe I’m on the phone with work I’ll call you back. I say just pick up quick, I call her she answers and I say I need to show you something let’s FaceTime. She says FaceTime why but I just click the button. It rings no answer and I see her get her in her car drive back to her apartment. She calls me a min later and says what the heck is going on. I hit FaceTime she answers and I basically instantly ask her if she’s been home the whole time.
For the next hour she lies to my face even after I said my friend saw her at a bar and sent me a picture. I said wow you must have a twin and said I believe you cus there’s no way you’d lie to my face for an hour. She says do you really think I’m that kind of person and how she’s never lied to me. I even told her I know she’s lying and she prolly thinks it would be bad to change her story but I’d prefer she does that and tells me the truth. She said I’m making shit up in my mind she doesn’t understand where this is coming from and that my therapy is clearly not working. I then tell her I asked my friend to check the parking lot and that he sent me a picture of her car. Her whole demeanor changed and admits she lied. I ask why she says she doesn’t know but how she’s felt like her life lately has been in a constant state of dictation. She said a female coworker asked her to go out and that she goes here for happy hour every Wednesday and knows the crowd. I said you could’ve just told me like we always do it’s not like I would’ve been upset or said no you can’t go! I was emotionless and told her can’t believe she’s lied to my face for the last hour and she’s crying saying sorry. I asked her are you sorry or only sorry now that you got caught in the lie because because before you knew I had concrete proof you continued to lie over and over again to my face tried to make me sound crazy but now you are sorry. She asked if we can get through this and I told her I’m not sure. She asked when will I know and I told her I’m not sure. We say goodnight. 10 mins later she texts me saying I love you. I don’t respond.
In the morning she sends a sad face since I didn’t respond to her I love you text from last night and said I want to get through this I’m really sorry and that she loves me. I said do you love me and how you don’t lie to someone face 50 times that you claim to love. She says I do love and I’ve shown you that and that I care and asks if we can get through this and back to us. I fell back asleep and wake up to a picture of the GPS tracker and her asking if I know anything about it and would care to explain.
I panic and don’t know how to respond. 1.5 hours later as I’m going to admit it was me and explain why I did it she texts me “I cannot believe how we got to this point but I am proceeding with the understanding that our relationship has terminated, we will not be moving in together and you will not attempt to contact my place of employment or apartment. A police report was filed as an unauthorized tracking device was found in my vehicle. I truly wish you all the best in your future”. I spoke to a few friends and they all told me to give her a few days before reaching out but deep down I felt I should try and fix it right away.
This was Thursday. I woke up with a heavy feeling in my heart and went on social media to realize she was deleting and removing all of our posts. I called she sent it to voicemail asked me why I called and I told her I woke up missing her and wanted to talk. She called me back and I spoke to her for over an hour and she basically said this is unfixable and how I had a few opportunities to tell her I love her that we are going to get through this and that I could’ve come clean about the fact I knew she was lying because of the tracker and not made up a story about my “friend” and let her feel so bad about lying while I installed a gps tracker in her car. I expressed my love and feelings for her and explained again why I did what I did and apologized sincerely for invading her trust and privacy but she said there’s no coming back from this despite crying while saying it. She said it’s going to be hard but we all live and learn from our actions and how she truly believes everything happens for a reason and that the universe wanted this to come to light.
Again today I woke up with this heavy crushing feeling in my heart I find myself wanting to watch her stories (she didn’t remove or block me off Facebook or instagram) she posted one with motivational quotes about being strong and moving on no matter what happens in life which made me want to say I miss you or out a sad emoji reaction on it. I want to text her about random things like items she left at my place or to tell her I miss her but most of what I’m reading is saying to have no contact, give space and stay focused on working on myself.
I apologize for the book but any advice / suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

The first date
I had gotten out of work at 3pm the Tuesday following Labor Day, Lisa is all I could think about that weekend. It was by far the longest weekend of my life. I don’t know what magical spell she placed on me but this was the first girl I could really see marrying, pretty sure I told my grandmother so that weekend. God, I was so young. On my way home from work I went to the jewelry store adjacent to my hotel to look at engagement rings. I know, totally nuts. I had spent maybe 4 hours with this girl and I was ready to settle down. God I wish it was 1940 and that was socially acceptable. I looked at rings and talked with a sales person, I told them I had met the girl I’m going to marry. What was wrong with me?! Why was I even saying anything. After he showed me some rings I quickly realized I’m too poor for anything nice. Lisa deserves the world and I knew I couldn’t give her more than a 1/2 ct cubic zirconia ring on a silver band at the time.
I still hadn’t heard anything from Lisa, I was starting to lose hope. Thinking she probably came to her senses, letting a random guy you met on an airplane into your life is generally ill advised. I wouldn’t blame her. So I went home to my hotel, room 23 at the Hampton inn.
I was sitting on my cardboard thin lumpy couch contemplating my life as I often do when the phone rang. I let it ring for a few seconds, took a deep breath and picked it up. “Hey Peter it’s Lisa” I jumped up off the couch and started pacing around my hotel room trying to play it cool. Which I was far from cool. She was a teacher in South Carolina working about an hour away. Sounding flustered, she explained that her car was still broken and she was waiting for a ride from her room mate and it was going to be a long time. So naturally I offered her a ride, before she even had an opportunity to ask, at first she was skeletal. But I explained, I didn’t have anything to do, I lived in a hotel and was happy to help. She finally agreed, gave me the address and I promptly drove there. I couldn’t even believe this was actually happening, I really didn’t know what to expect when I arrived. This girl was so clearly out of my league, in every aspect, I didn’t want to do anything to hinder any shot at a date. The drive there got very rural, like tractors and corn fields rural. When I arrived I signed in at the front desk. I’m given a visitor pass, they call her and she comes up to the front. Later she told me she wanted me to sign in so if she was found dead they knew who did it lol, she’s a smart cookie and we were essentially strangers that met once in a forced situation. If she got to pick seats on the plane it probably wouldn’t have been next to me.
She is wearing this floury top I believe white with some blue, very professional. She was definitely the hottest teacher by far just so you know. She gives me a quick hello and says she needs to grab a few things. I offer to help and follow her closely to her classroom. She leads me down a long hall and around a few corners, I can picture the classroom but I can’t remember the number. It’s cute, she’s done a good job decorating, along with her co-teacher Betty. It was nice to see her work place and get to know her more. She was (and is) so impressive to me. Lisa gave me a quick tour and we hit the road. I’m driving down these back roads and I kept swerving over the double yellow. I apologized, she gives me a funny look, like this guy sucks at driving. I’m distracted by her! I’m mesmerized by her blue eyes, between the sun and the white shirt reflecting off her eyes, the blue was deep indigo around her pupil blending to an almost reflective light blue. I can picture it now, I’ll never forget that moment because that’s when I realized I was actually falling in love with this girl. I can’t stop myself, I tell her, and I think this might be a direct quote. “Your eyes are insanely beautiful and they are distracting me” who even says the word insanely? This idiot. But she blushed and said thank you. I remember her asking me what direction we are going, and I say I don’t know. She said you should always know what direction you’re headed. She then asserted we are headed North. We could have been floating in space I was there for it. From that day on I made it a point to orient myself.
I ask if she’s hungry and I recommend this BBQ spot I had been to, Mac’s. She said that sounded fine, she could eat. The debate whether this was a date or not started and I don’t think we ever settled it, so yes this is what I consider our first date. The drive was about an hour, but it went by incredibly fast, our conversations always flowed really well. We are both well read and educated in totally different fields, we can talk about almost anything and actually being interested in what the other person is saying. When we arrived the place is almost empty besides two cops a few tables away. At least that’s what I remember. Didn’t matter, I was solely focused on her. We were seated at a high top table for two. I wasn’t old enough for a beer yet and didn’t think I’d press my luck with the cops there. I ordered a water, she gives me a side eye and I knew, that she knew, but didn’t say anything . I honestly can’t remember what I had, probably a burger or ribs or whatever was the cheapest thing. I never looked at what I actually wanted when I was younger. I can’t remember what she had either, I’m hoping she might remember, I’ll have to ask her. I only remember looking at her, I can still picture her sitting at that high top. Smiling at me. Like she actually liked me. I know; I was just as amazed as you are. After dinner, we went over to the apartment she shared with two other teachers. I walk her up to her door. She introduces me to one of her roommates, he’s a personality for sure, I’m sure he’ll come up at some point. We hug and say goodnight, she asked my age and I said “20ish…” not actually wanting to tell her I was 3 years younger than her! And the age of some of the kids that got held back in her school she complained about at dinner. But She said “I knew you couldn’t drink!” we both laughed at the fact the cops where there and chatted in the door frame for a while. I gave her a hug and the promise that I’d be back to look at her car the following afternoon. I wanted to kiss her that night but didn’t, it was too soon. I walked back to my car completely awestruck. I couldn’t believe that date actually happened. I wasn’t sure I could actually fix her car, but I was going to try. Anything to see her again and make her happy.

Hi! I wanna start by saying that I am making this post because I have played both Dragon's Dogma 1 and 2 completely throughout and analysed the story-beats and little details that are scattered throughout both.
Those who have played through the first game will know that the over-arching plot of the game is to kill the dragon that marked you as an Arisen and then defeat the current Seneschal, the quote-unquote 'God' of the world. The story in DD2 is very similar, you become marked as an Arisen and are tasked with killing the Dragon who marked you as such. You meet a figure who is known as 'The Pathfinder', a man who only you can see and he seems to meet the visual criteria of The Seneschal and maybe much like I did at first, you will assume that he is The Seneschal throughout your whole playthrough leading to much confusion around the end of the game. What I am going to tell you now will probably make you go "Ooooohhhhh" and click things into place just like it did with me.
First off.. The Pathfinder is NOT the Seneschal, he is a higher form of being, one much greater and older. "So who is The Seneschal?" I may hear you ask, its Rothais, The Mad Sovran, the Beastran man who lives in the Seafloor Shrine, the literal ruins of Gran Soren in the middle of the ocean. Everything about him matches what makes up a Seneschal. When you meet him, he tells you that he expected you to face him, to attempt to take his place just like countless other Arisen before you, but he bested them all, killing them. He then talks about how he once was someone who watched over the world before deciding he didn't want to anymore and materialising himself into the world to create the land of Vermund, upsetting the will of 'The Watching One' aka The Pathfinder. Once he realises that you arent simply sent to attempt to kill him, he gives you a blade known as Godsbane, perishing in the process.
If alarm bells aren't immediately ringing in your head, let me summarise. Rothais was once an Arisen who arose to the standing of Seneschal, watching over the world from above. Much like our character from the first game, he did not like this fate and did not want to adhere to the rules of The Cycle, but unlike our character from the first game who killed himself with Godsbane, Rothais instead chose to materialise himself within the world, becoming physical. He refused to adhere to the rules of The Seneschal and did not continue to mark Arisen to overtake him... so a higher force chose to take over known as The Pathfinder. Due to Rothais still living, the Cycle continued on, a Dragon was still made to mark an Arisen and this Arisen would kill the dragon and continue on to become the role of The Seneschal, however upon face to face with The Seneschal, Rothais, none would succeed. Time and time again Arisen would be thrown at Rothais by the higher power known as The Pathfinder to take his place as The Seneschal. Until eventually The Arisen that we play in DD2 shows up, unknowing of The Cycle, not even yet having slain his Dragon. Rothais knew nothing of the 'Godsway' created from souls of the Arisen, but knew of Godsbane, which he knew he could create in exchange for his life, his Arisen soul, afterall he was originally destined to bestow it to the Arisen who could best him in battle. He bets it all on you, his desire for the world to have free will, free from The Pathfinder's meddling, giving up his soul to bestow upon you The Godsbane early. In hopes that its power, even if dulled, could be enough to destroy The Pathfinder and free the world of The Cycle. Which if you've done the True ending, we do!
I love this game, both of the Dragon's Dogma games, and upon having this realisation, I knew that it may be a while before the community comes to this conclusion and realisation, alongside also seeing others other than myself mistake The Pathfinder as The Seneschal. So I truly do hope that to those who love these games too or simply just want to know more of the lore and how it connects to what we know from the first game have been able to gain a better understanding of what was portrayed in DD2.
Anyhow, I've babbled enough, I hope this was informative. Have a good day and goodnight to you all!

Hi! I wanna start by saying that I am making this post because I have played both Dragon's Dogma 1 and 2 completely throughout and analysed the story-beats and little details that are scattered throughout both.
Those who have played through the first game will know that the over-arching plot of the game is to kill the dragon that marked you as an Arisen and then defeat the current Seneschal, the quote-unquote 'God' of the world. The story in DD2 is very similar, you become marked as an Arisen and are tasked with killing the Dragon who marked you as such. You meet a figure who is known as 'The Pathfinder', a man who only you can see and he seems to meet the visual criteria of The Seneschal and maybe much like I did at first, you will assume that he is The Seneschal throughout your whole playthrough leading to much confusion around the end of the game. What I am going to tell you now will probably make you go "Ooooohhhhh" and click things into place just like it did with me.
First off.. The Pathfinder is NOT the Seneschal, he is a higher form of being, one much greater and older. "So who is The Seneschal?" I may hear you ask, its Rothais, The Mad Sovran, the Beastran man who lives in the Seafloor Shrine, the literal ruins of Gran Soren in the middle of the ocean. Everything about him matches what makes up a Seneschal. When you meet him, he tells you that he expected you to face him, to attempt to take his place just like countless other Arisen before you, but he bested them all, killing them. He then talks about how he once was someone who watched over the world before deciding he didn't want to anymore and materialising himself into the world to create the land of Vermund, upsetting the will of 'The Watching One' aka The Pathfinder. Once he realises that you arent simply sent to attempt to kill him, he gives you a blade known as Godsbane, perishing in the process.
If alarm bells aren't immediately ringing in your head, let me summarise. Rothais was once an Arisen who arose to the standing of Seneschal, watching over the world from above. Much like our character from the first game, he did not like this fate and did not want to adhere to the rules of The Cycle, but unlike our character from the first game who killed himself with Godsbane, Rothais instead chose to materialise himself within the world, becoming physical. He refused to adhere to the rules of The Seneschal and did not continue to mark Arisen to overtake him... so a higher force chose to take over known as The Pathfinder. Due to Rothais still living, the Cycle continued on, a Dragon was still made to mark an Arisen and this Arisen would kill the dragon and continue on to become the role of The Seneschal, however upon face to face with The Seneschal, Rothais, none would succeed. Time and time again Arisen would be thrown at Rothais by the higher power known as The Pathfinder to take his place as The Seneschal. Until eventually The Arisen that we play in DD2 shows up, unknowing of The Cycle, not even yet having slain his Dragon. Rothais knew nothing of the 'Godsway' created from souls of the Arisen, but knew of Godsbane, which he knew he could create in exchange for his life, his Arisen soul, afterall he was originally destined to bestow it to the Arisen who could best him in battle. He bets it all on you, his desire for the world to have free will, free from The Pathfinder's meddling, giving up his soul to bestow upon you The Godsbane early. In hopes that its power, even if dulled, could be enough to destroy The Pathfinder and free the world of The Cycle. Which if you've done the True ending, we do!
I love this game, both of the Dragon's Dogma games, and upon having this realisation, I knew that it may be a while before the community comes to this conclusion and realisation, alongside also seeing others other than myself mistake The Pathfinder as The Seneschal. So I truly do hope that to those who love these games too or simply just want to know more of the lore and how it connects to what we know from the first game have been able to gain a better understanding of what was portrayed in DD2.
Anyhow, I've babbled enough, I hope this was informative. Have a good day and goodnight to you all!

Ho there, I have no doubt that such a title is certainly pretentious, but I do honestly think that this could be the definitive work on the subject of the best Princess within the game. I do hope you'll check this out, and with that, cheers!
(Disclaimer: I know it’s absurdly long, and for that I apologize. I apparently am more unwilling to make cuts than I am to present subpar work. I’m working on it. Only editing I do for my autistic ramblings is copyediting, baby! Whoo! I will be updating this for the Pristine Cut once it comes out and we get even *more* Damsel. Obviously, as I’m sure you can tell from the length, I really like Damsel. There will be all of the bias. It will be great.)
(Author’s Note: For the love of the most high God, it took me like twenty read throughs for me to standardize what I wanted to call the Scorched Grey. Here is a brief list of all the terms I used to refer to her: Scorched Grey, Burned Grey, Burning Grey, Fire Grey, Damsel Chapter 3. Sometimes but not always preceded by “the” or “The”.)
Alright, ladies and gentlemen. I have oft made the statement on here that Damsel is the best route in the game, and this began as me trying to definitively prove that, by microscopically going through the route, I could establish exactly why, it would seem, that Damsel has objective superiority. It sorta… evolved, though, so instead I will be going relatively chronologically throughout, and trying to point out a couple things that all of you know about and maybe a couple things you don’t about the best character in the game. With that preamble out of the way, let’s begin with the goofy stuff, the grab bag if you will.
This will certainly be more personal taste than anything else, but I do think there’s a lot of miscellaneous stuff that Damsel does better than the other chapters. For example, I am convinced that it has the third best music, behind Tower and her routes and then Thorn. I am genuinely obsessed with “It Was Always That Easy”. The basement has some *fantastic* art, and I think that really carries a chapter that is otherwise generally bland when it comes to actual visual activity. It’s really carried by its genuinely perfect dialogue.
Overall, and most importantly, this chapter is the undisputed master of the idea of positive ambience. You know elevator music? How it’s there to artificially increase the cheeriness of an otherwise dreary moment, like a hotel hallway or, yanno, an elevator? Well, this is the chapter that does it perfectly. Everything is designed to make it “nicer” than it actually is. The Narrator even takes that into account when describing the basement. The sound design is fresh and relaxing, the music is uplifting, the Princess’s voice is obviously fantastically done, but also the Voice of the Smitten plays a large role in making it feel “good”. It’s something that exists in order to communicate exactly the feelings it wants the player to feel, which is all warm and fuzzy inside. But let’s move on to the actual content, shall we?
Damsel has *the* best Chapter One and it isn’t even close. Certainly not in the horror department, where I think Beast and Nightmare shine, or even in the whole characterization bit, where the award can only go to Spectre and the masterclass that is her Chapter One. But Damsel has something else to it. Damsel has tragedy, almost Shakespearean in nature. Nobody else has it (except Witch, to some extent, but nowhere close to the same level), nobody manages to reach that connection, there and then broken, to honestly feel for both Princess and Slayer. Allow me to paint a picture of a playthrough.
You are on a path in the woods. At the end of that path is a cabin. In the basement of that cabin is a princess. You are here to slay her. But you don’t do that. That voice itching in the back of your skull, the one you quite literally call Hero, your moral compass even, raises some objections. You don’t want to kill *anybody*. That isn’t something you want to mark yourself with, especially not solely on the word of an individual you just met. For now, violence is a nonstarter.
You enter the cabin. And you hear her voice. And you see her. You even talk with her for a while. The moment is… hypnotizing. Despite the Narrator’s warning of manipulation, well, you cannot help but be manipulated. This is a genuinely nice, sweet, scared Princess who simply wants to be free. You have to save her. It is the right thing to do, it is the… only thing to do. Anything else marks you with the dirtiness of simply being unwilling to help someone in need when you had the full ability to.
You go to get a key. Unsuccessful. The door locks. Even worse. The Narrator is moving from irritating to downright malicious, clearly enjoying recounting the lock of the door. Disgust for Him has been present since you entered the cabin, but it shifts to anger very quickly. That shift continues with full force as you attempt with what little ability you have to save the Princess, even if you don’t quite know how you will get out. The question does not last long. For the shift to anger shifts once more, to a sort of incomprehensible fury.
For the Narrator has crossed a line. Not only has he taken away any semblance of choice, not only has he raised your own knife against an innocent, someone who has been nothing but kind to you, but you are the one who must bear the shame for it. You are the only one who is doing the foul deed in any eyes but your own. Speaking of, the Princess’s eyes are filled with genuine happiness at the moment, as you are finally giving her the freedom she has yearned for such a long time. Yet through no fault of your own, you raise the pristine blade, the one you refused to bring down to the basement in the first place. You scramble through the list of options, attempting to find anything that could provide a sliver of hope in the situation, anything without the grim finality of “Slay the Princess”.
At last, you find one, and are able to bark out a warning to the Princess. That happiness in her eyes is shifted to a look of fear, one directed at you alone, one condemning you with such a sorrowful betrayal that it almost hurts to see. She begs for you to stop, and then she says something that almost calms the internal storm of the player: “Please, I know this isn’t you.” She recognizes that it isn’t us that betrayed her, she understands that we aren’t trying to do this, that we are flat-out trying to stop it. But the eye of that storm is passing, and soon.
And as she takes the blade, as she prepares to do what she must to live, that same look of tragic betrayal crosses her eyes, this time not directed at us, but at herself. She hates that this is her only option, the only way that she can live is to kill another, one with every intention of freeing her and no intention of harming her. And in the end, she simultaneously underscores the tragedy of the moment while confirming our perception that she could never be a threat to the world. As she plunges the blade into our chest, she has failed to even do the bare minimum of making our death painless, something that fills her with even more guilt, tears streaming down her cheeks as she tries and fails to end our own agony. The last thing we see of her are her endless cascade of both tears and apologies, as everything goes dark.
This… is beautiful. A glorious tragedy, one with limited theming, simply two characters with emotions that feel natural. And, quite strangely, the first chapter has almost nothing to do with the second chapter. But it is still important. I’ll get to that later. Better things await now! For with the end of the tale of the Hero and the Princess, we have a new individual, everyone’s favorite buddy, the Voice of the Smitten.
I am certain I do not need to underscore just how popular Smitten is. Easily the most fan favorite of the fan favorites, especially solidifying his place within that roster with the Kiss from a Thorn. He is jovial, passionate, he is Don Quixote, complete with the unlimited self-delusion that comes with the territory. There’s a reason people love him. Romantic in a game entitled a love story, the largest of personalities in a game stuffed with them, he is the storybook hero come to life in a game that has just as much reverence for storybook heroes as the deconstructions of them. In short, he is the visage of likability itself, with all the bombast that comes with that. Yet that is only from a wholly external perspective.
For what I am certain I do need to underscore is just how sinister Smitten is. For all of his likability, the Smitten is also probably the single slimiest voice out of all of them with the possible exception of the Opportunist. This is not a new revelation – people have understood that since the beginning with his frankly disturbing behavior regarding the Princess. What is perhaps more interesting is his relationship with the player. For he is one of the two options that reflect the player at this point within the story. Either the player is trying to do the right thing and free an innocent, or they have somewhat… different motivations.
The former reflects the Hero. Somewhat naive, in many routes somewhat bumbling even, but first and foremost focused on the external. That is, “how can I make a positive impact on the world around me?” As contradictory as it may seem to how the Hero is presented, it’s something of an intellectualist approach. The Hero is trying to find the best possible world and working towards that with all of his might. It is, one could say, devoid of emotion except that determination to change the world, to make it a better place. While the goal remains the same, the path to get there is fundamentally continuously being calculated. The Hero is your conscience, and as such he must *always* work overtime for that.
The Smitten is not that. No, he has made no secret that he is the path of passion. Even when he is generally considered to be a better person, he declares that, “Whatever world would condemn two star-crossed lovers to a cycle of violence and despair isn’t a world worth saving.” His focus is internal, it is on ourself and our romance. There is no extensive study into what is the correct option, there is only what would assist in our relationship, which is somehow ordained by the universe. To put it into understandable terms, Hero is a modern hero while Smitten is a Romantic-era hero.
There’s an important line when going down the stairs that I think speaks volumes about the type of player and playthrough currently occurring. That is “We can still do right by her without all this over-the-top fawning.” *That* is the line of demarcation between the route of the Hero and the route of the Smitten. If you decide to embrace or repudiate the Smitten at that point, I think the route is sealed. I am convinced that the game will continue on in a fixed way based on that philosophy. The point where you must, internally that is, decide if you are doing this out of a desire for what is right, or an infatuation with the Princess.
Now, of course there isn’t anything wrong with taking the path of the Smitten, and it’s personally one of my top points in the game, but whether you admit it or not, you are long past morality being what decides your actions. That has come and gone. Now, the goal is to express the passion of the moment and delve into your romantic relationship with the Princess. I’ll be evaluating each of the routes differently, loosely organized with a focus on how it reacts to the player. After that, I’ll go on into theming of each route one by one and all that jazz.
The path of the Smitten first. The player embraces that he has been sent to save the Princess from her unjust and foul imprisonment above all else. So that is what he does. He marches downstairs, the blade being nothing but a passing afterthought as it is immediately dismissed out of hand. When it comes to the crucial point of “doing right by her”, the justification is made that two things can be done at once, that you can do this for her and do a little bit of fawning on the way. Doesn’t harm anyone.
And with that the basement arrives, and you see the Princess on the floor. She is perfect in all ways. There is nothing wrong with her. And that’s before you start talking to her. When you do begin talking to her, all of the kindness and innocence from Chapter 1 are magnified to the greatest degree possible. She can do no wrong. And, from a meta standpoint, there’s another thing that stands out – it is really, *really* funny. From everything the Smitten says to the “Then I didn’t end the world!” to the Narrator’s (a villain at this point) growing exasperation at your trust for the Princess, it endears you to the moment even more.
Because it’s not only that it’s funny. It’s not only that the Princess is genuinely nice to you. It’s something more than that. Something that I am loath to talk about but will anyway. The Princess is incredibly – *sigh* – **cute** within this chapter. This is objective, with science to back me up, I’m sure. But she is specifically designed to be as heartwarming as possible, and every line makes her more and more into someone who should be saved by you, into, well, a Damsel. While it isn’t explicitly stated, throughout the progression of dialogue, the need to protect her becomes more pronounced. You were already primed to like the Princess, you already internally committed to a romantic future. But after stepping into the bear trap willingly, you cannot escape.
And if you’re anything like me, you are perfectly fine with that. So you take in the moment, you rescue her from her chains and laugh at the way her hands slipped out of the chains and the Narrator’s comical anger at it. It’s all very feel-good, all cleanly written dialogue, and both the Princess and the Smitten are likable, they’re fun, and the Narrator is a fun enough villain for the Smitten and you to unite against. The Hero, if we’re being honest, barely registers, and if he does it’s usually as an extension to the Narrator, as a foil to yourself. And with her finally free, she embraces you, sealing the deal on her perfection.
And after that, something else happens. The deconstruction begins. You want to see if her dialogue has any more of that saccharine present throughout the rest of the chapter, and are immediately rewarded with the “The princess closes her eyes in deep reflection” and the follow up joke. Hungry for more, you click through some more of the dialogue, but something begins to happen. She begins to… unwind. The Smitten seems to reciprocate in turn, to a lesser extent. In fact, she really starts to return to the horror that this chapter was a nice respite from. So you cut your losses, decide to leave with her, and everything returns to normal. Bathed in the glow of your future, you immediately forget about the deconstruction.
After that, you finally get out of the basement, get a genuinely great moment opening the door alongside the Princess, never think twice about clicking “You’re not doing that.” as fast as humanly possible, and finally await the door at the end of the cabin. You finally get your fairytale ending. The princess goes out into the world together with you. You brought her out. And then she is taken by the Shifting Mound in a way reminiscent of her dying. Even if this wasn’t your first playthrough, it still comes as a shock. For the most part, you were being that Romantic hero, living in the moment with your passion. The thought of this happening was gone entirely. This wasn’t supposed to happen. And it *hurts*. And the chapter is over.
The route of the Hero has a different point of view on the whole situation. That’s not to say it’s not easy to get drawn in by the hilarious dialogue and sheer cuteness of the Princess – far from it. It is, after all, what drives the conflict within this. For the Hero, and the player that goes along his path, has one bit of information stand out. That the world ended after the Princess killed you. Now, you can naturally be skeptical of the information, but the Princess isn’t helping her case here. Entirely vague, entirely unwilling to mention anything about it. The only thing she seems to care about is getting on your good side.
Now, you still want to save her. That much is clear. You still don’t take the knife in the beginning, and you saw her Chapter 1 incarnation. She is still a good person, kind and loving. But there are questions raised, important questions. Which is why not all Hero routers get the same ending. There is a conflict between how far you’re able to go before the risk of the world ending eclipses your distrust of the Narrator and your trust of the Princess. If the whole world really does end if she’s free, is it worth it? And as such you get to the major points of the Hero ending.
The first is the Deconstructed ending. As you question the Princess, you desperately try to figure out what the best way to go forward is for you. And that starts with getting a straight answer from the Princess on what exactly she plans on doing. The operation… does not go well. As you try and push for anything, any sign that she isn’t going to end the world, the same rejoinder comes in, alongside a distorted track. “I just want to make you happy.” The Princess is not an individual anymore, and begins to change shape. But you are locked in with a horrified inability to look away, like one who sees a car accident. And with that, the Princess is a Princess no longer, and the Shifting Mound takes her away.
There’s also the option of taking the Hero’s advice when confronted with the scenario: to leave. You don’t like what’s going on and you try to do whatever you can to undo the doing. Perhaps surprisingly, it works. And then you’re forced to deal with the cognitive dissonance of the Princess and *that* being the same individual. But you, not without a healthy dose of skepticism, still head upstairs alongside the Princess. In the end, you can’t bring yourself to kill her. Throughout it all, she still has been the beautifully endearing picture of innocence, if a questionable one, and especially with regards to the knife on the table, there is no way you can take it to her chest with no warning, especially after everything you did in the first Chapter. So you leave with her, and the “end of the world” really does come in one fell swoop with the call of the Shifting Mound. You can’t help but wonder if the decision you made was the right one, not really. Like, you still believe she didn’t deserve to die, but maybe, just maybe, it would have been a better ending.
So what if you did kill her? What happens when love *truly* melts away into skepticism. After the continuous question dodging and whatever the… other thing was, this is clearly not an ordinary Princess, it is not the same Princess that you tried to save at the beginning. There is only a sliver of her, a shadow of her former self. Slaying her, well, slaying her is probably doing her a favor. It might be doing the world a favor, too. Maybe she is an individual with malicious intent. And as you take the blade and plunge it into her chest, you instantly know you made the wrong decision. She does not oppose it. She simply lets you kill her with a single tear hanging in her eye, saying “I think this is what you want.” It’s meant to feel dirty and it does, even heartbreaking in the moment, although it is immediately counterbalanced by the effect of the Smitten killing you over it.
I won’t exactly go over Scorched Grey the same way, I think there’s generally only two frames of mind going into it, and that’s either the standard “Hero-Skeptic” framework that I’ll expand on later, or simply a completionist mindset. Plus, it’s technically not The Damsel. Plus I’m lazy. But this is the point where I will try to expand on the theming of each and every route and mindset to go through within the Chapter, and that *will* include the Scorched Grey theming.
It’s made quite clear from the chapter that one of the primary themes is objectification, the making of the Princess into nothing more than a vehicle to live one’s fantasy into. The taking of an individual and making them into an it. The destruction of humanity by your own desire, and what that says about your desires in the first place. Ironically, this is merely one fourth wall away from the rest of the Princesses, each of them being a piece of fiction that many simply engage with *because* they are an object, but with the Damsel it is directly nodded to within the narrative. One meta-layer is peeled back, if you will.
Nothing hammers this more home than the entirely jarring line that escapes the Shifting Mound’s lips when you ask about the vessel she holds. Unlike the rest of the fragments, which are all given an indication that they have been fulfilled after the Shifting Mound takes them, the only note she has to say is that the Damsel has “served her purpose”. There is nothing that she wished for, as anyone who has obtained the deconstructed ending can attest to. But even in the more standard runs, she is simply a tool to be used and discarded. And there are three general reactions to this line.
The first is the hardcore Smitten route’s preferred choice, denial. “The Princess was far more than an object, she had character, she had kindness, she had motivations from the beginning! The narrative is what is wrong, there’s nothing wrong with the Princess. She. Is. Perfect. Not just from a narrative standpoint but a metanarrative one as well. She has depth, she *is* a character.” All in the hopes that if they insist on it enough, it will become true. The Damsel was not designed to be viewed in a vacuum. There are themes that run through her character, and including negative ones, and the denial of them is a far truer denial of the character than any sort of objectification could ever be.
Then the more moderate Smitten routers get a different response. A slap in the face. They did all of this, they had fun, they laughed with her, they cried when she was taken. They were connected to her, they had a real connection to what she was. One could even accuse them of… loving her. They honest to goodness cared about this Princess, they were invested in her story. Yet, in the end, they also formed her around themselves. They “molded her to love you”. As much as they loved the Princess, that was only because they cut out a piece of the Shifting Mound that they *could* love, a caricature of her true nature. They still took an individual, and despite truly loving her, made her into something that she was not so they could do that very thing. She is not a person. She is a plot device, an individual made to love and be loved with nothing beyond that. She is an object.
Lastly, those who went on the route of the Hero get that same slap in the face, that selfsame bucket of water poured over their heads, but in a different way. They didn’t try to objectify her. They didn’t want anything of the sort. All they wanted to do was the right thing. Right? Yet even in that desire to do the right thing, they still get that same chilling text from the Shifting Mound. They have built an individual just like those who went on the route of the Smitten. Just a different one. Not one who was built around your “glorious romance”, but rather one built around something of a glorious Romance. The need to be a Hero. The desire to do what was right, to save an unjustly imprisoned Princess. The Princess became a plot device in the end anyway, just one that needed to be saved rather than one who needed to be loved.
I want to continue off of that. The player is trying to do nothing more than the right thing, he is simply doing what a Hero should. And that determination to do what is right leads to him getting impacted the most by that line in the ending, the line that implies that whatever right he was doing, he was still being driven by selfishness, by that need to be a Hero. That hits the player right within where it hurts, it almost could be said to strike at the one emotional vulnerability of them. To have your hard work, your pain, your desire for what is right to be considered nothing more than the delusions of a Don Quixote tilting at windmills in order to fight giants, just as lost as Smitten, that doesn’t feel too great. It almost minimizes your struggle, and it is genius. You play as a Hero because you want to feel like a Hero, not because the morality of this world means anything to you. It is stripping that meta-layer down one by one.
But objectification is not the only theme present. While it may seem like something of a potpourri topic to throw in, earlier on the server we were talking about the Damsel in particular’s perceptiveness with regards to perception. When the door shuts and locks, it is the first and only time the Princess gets visibly **negative** in any way during the entirety of the Chapter. Even when you kill her, she still does so with nary a frown on her face. Even as a tear rolls down her cheek, she still smiles. But not at the door. The narration points out quite clearly that she frowns. This is, I reiterate, the only thing that happens. And her response is not “we’re stuck down here”, it is not “I’m unable to leave now”.
What it is happens to be “that’s not supposed to happen”. She recognizes the construct in a way very few allude to within the game. Adding onto that note, within the Scorched Grey chapter, she (correctly) determines the very nature of the construct and that inherent “cycle of violence and despair” inherent to it, even (correctly) determining that the only way to leave was to annihilate that very construct. This is shown even clearer at the other major event at the door. When you ask if the Princess can open the door, the sole question she throws back at you is “Do you think I can?”, and after a response in the affirmative, “Then I can”. In the end, it is quite clear that she is, *heavily* ironically, one of the more aware characters in the game with regards to your circumstance.
While speaking of the Scorched Grey, I think this route also exemplifies another major theme – the nature of the Princess as a being of perception. All routes exemplify one facet of the Shifting Mound: Spectre represents the gravity of her, Tower her divinity, Prisoner the very incarnation in and of itself of her within the construct, and so on. Damsel has something different, though, and that is that she’s just a slippery little fella. Far more than anybody else, Damsel changes throughout her chapters, in ways more pronounced than anybody else. The Shifting Mound declares that we “molded her to love you”, as I quoted previously. That molding takes stage front and center throughout all of our interactions with her.
The most obvious example is her deconstruction, which when her sole true motivation (to leave) is discarded, she begins to break down, unable to offer to the player anything beyond the only desire every other Princess has. With the compulsive need to love the player, etched into her core, there is nothing she can do other than try to add to that love, losing herself within the process. But that is not the only time she changes. Because she is willing to give up that freedom in, well, a heartbeat. Attempting to kill her does not lead to any sort of resistance from her. The one goal she had, staying alive and winning her freedom, is out the window despite being (questionably) willing to kill for it in the last chapter. Now, throughout the Scorched Grey, it’s made clear that she did not, in fact, want to die, that she just wanted to be free together, but the complete unwillingness to save her own life is a stark contrast to the first chapter.
In fact, that perpetually changing nature alongside her being so objectified means that it’s really, *really* hard to figure out her true character. There is very little in her that does not change and very little remaining that isn’t specifically put there by you. She is an eel, wriggling out of your grasp and impossible to pin down, in a large way like the Shifting Mound herself. But… for the most part, there are two facets to her character beyond the already listed themes. And a sharp divide between them.
Chapter One Damsel and Chapter Two Damsel are not the same person. That’s usually true for most of them, but they also usually have some semblance of similarity between their counterparts. The only exceptions I can think off the top of my head are Spectre and *maaybe* Stranger if you want to count that. The rest of them act as exaggerated versions of the existing individuals shown. Chapter One Adversary likes fights. Chapter Two Adversary likes fights. Chapter One Witch is built on the back of distrust. Chapter Two Witch is built on the back of distrust. Everything lines up nicely.
That is not the case for the Damsel. The only thing that you can say with both of them is that they are nice and do not want to hurt you. The Chapter One incarnation (henceforth Princess) is a tragedy of a character that doesn’t want to kill you but still must to secure her own life and freedom against a renegade puppeting you. The Chapter Two incarnation (henceforth Damsel) is a Horror-”Feel-Good”-Comedic-Tragic character that shows nothing about the emotional anguish she went through in chapter one. I love both of them, but they have an unmatched disconnect. And I think that sort of adds to the character. Now, there is absolutely a benefit from an emotional through-line (there’s a reason Thorn is my second-favorite chapter), but in this case, only brief touches to the beginning enhance the story.
The most striking thing is the sense of comedic horror that comes when Damsel just completely ignores any expected trauma from the Princess’s emotional destruction. It, depending on the route you take, either makes you love her character more and more as the humor begins to entrap you, or it begins the process of getting the player unnerved, exactly like the developers wanted. It is a key dividing point in the mindset of the player and the route that they have chosen. The Damsel says nothing about what happened, heck, she barely acknowledges it except to indicate that “You died!”
Secondly, it sets up Damsel as a sympathetic figure while still allowing her to begin establishing herself. Without the setup from the Princess, the player has no idea how to view Damsel, potentially even seeing her as a less on-the-nose Razor, with her comedically hiding her sinister intentions. The Princess allows the player to begin on a note that the Princess is *actually* friendly rather than simply pretending to be so. At the same time, it’s divorced enough that apart from that frame of reference at the beginning, Damsel is still allowed to shine within her own character.
Lastly, and most importantly, it sets her up for the Scorched Grey. The guilt at causing the death of an innocent and the belief that you would be unable to cause the death of an innocent yourself leads her to blame the construct and attempt to bring it down, which seals your fate in the third Damsel chapter, the only time where the two chapters meet in a beautiful climax of Passion going too far and causing pain, in attempt of running away from that very thing, morphing into something that not even the Smitten is able to remain devoted to in an awful tragedy of love being not enough in the end.
Wait, wait, wait. Did I hear “the end” being spoken? At this time of year? Localized entirely within this essay? Well then, it’s time to talk about what puts this saga at pure perfection, shall we? I probably could just use the awesome power of Ctrl + V to get the desired effect, but I still do want to offer my narration, so I’ll compromise and do a bit of both. “Your lover drives a stake into your body. And another. And another. And another. And another. Do I miss your heart because I cannot stand to see it go? But the stakes meant nothing to you. You had a desire, and you set that desire free, you lifting me and me lifting you, forever and ever and ever, consumed by true belief, there was nothing that could hold us back.”
Do I even need to explain why that’s so good? Definitively the best poem in the end, it isn’t even close, especially when coupled with Ms. Goodnight’s awe-inspiring delivery. Did I say that the Scorched Grey was the perfect synthesis of the Princess and the Damsel? I was lying. This is. Every word so lovingly placed, the language sounds like it comes from the pen of God Himself. It is emotionally resonant, the art is beautiful, I have not run into such a short piece of dialogue that outdoes it. Gonna be honest, mostly just wrote up this essay to gush about it. Even now, it is considered by most everyone to be one of the best lines of dialogue in a game filled with magnificent ones.
And the other one, that of the Scorched Grey. It’s simpler, ironically. “I kill you. You kill me. Back and forth we go, faster and faster and faster. I kill you. You kill me. Hollow eyes watch from the dry corners of a memory. A home built on all of the futures that were supposed to be, preserved until the moment of reunion. The fire of the heart sets it all ablaze. I kill you and me.”
This, this right here is one of the most slept on ending poems and it’s not even funny. So fantastic at expressing the heartbreak inherent to the Scorched Grey’s character. I don’t know how you can see the line “A home built on all the futures that were supposed to be”, especially with the Scorched Grey dead and charring in a wedding gown, and not feel *something*. It’s not as good as the standard Damsel stuff, but then again, nothing is. It’s still deserving of more praise than it currently receives, and one of my top three ending poems of all time, only edged out by Prisoner. Gosh, this game belongs in a museum.
Seems I need to debunk some stuff that happens to get a lot of traction regarding those who speculate on Damsel, too. First of all, her character motivation is not guilt nor gratitude. That sort of thing works incredibly well in fanworks, and I’m happy to see it because that means I get to see Damsel in a fanwork. It has little to no backing within canon. Damsel is a chapter about the only motivations for the Princess being those put in place by the objectification of the player. There is nothing regarding anything beyond that, and it detracts from the existing, well-elucidated themes that are actually within the chapter. The only sort of substance to them is both Chapter 1 Princess and Scorched Grey indicating guilt for killing you, but that is almost entirely repudiated within the actual Chapter 2.
Speaking of the Scorched Grey, another thing I saw somewhat extensively is that you somehow “taught her” that killing is the way to love one another, and that’s why she kills you in Chapter 3, and I honestly do not know how that gained any traction at all. It’s pretty clear that she views all the death as a pretty terrible and messed up thing and only kills the two of you to escape the cycle of death. It’s spoken of as a means to an end, not an end in and of itself. I am genuinely confused on how this got started, because it really just… opposes the main *in-narrative* themes of the Chapter??? Like, you don’t even have to analyze it, it’s just within the text, plain and simple.
Anyway, I deeply apologize for the length of this once again, look forward to an appendix when Pristine Cut comes out. I’ve already played it because my uncle works at Black Tabby, but I don’t want to spoil it for you gents. If my opinions change massively after playing through the new update from today, I will change that too. Anyway, Damsel is the best character, literally does not do a single thing wrong within any of her chapters, has definitively the best Shifty stuff, and you should invest in her. As more people vocally become willing to throw money at anything related to Damsel, the likelier it is that we get Damsel merch. I need it so badly. Please. Anyway, if anything stands out to you or you disagree, I am begging you to tell me to get my act together and explain what I said wrong, so do that. Also please.

Well, as of today, there are 12 episodes of jaku character tomozaki kun, and in the 12th episode, I feel tomozaki fumbled hard by choosing fuka over mimimi.(Extreme Cope) Let me explain why mimimi is a better heroine or more suited to tomozaki than Fuka

1. So, whenever, we see tomozaki becoming self depreciating, or say harsh thing about himself, mimimi would always confront him, and would say kind things to him, whereas fuka would be like :🗿

2.mimimi genuinely loves tomozaki and she expressed it in solid words, whereas fuka would be like:🗿(Many of you may argue that fuka is a introvert, hence she could not confess to tomozaki as of now but you what? Its take the same courage for everyone to say the 3 magical words to your loved one, everyone feels scared of rejection or embarrassment.)

1. Fuka as of now doesn't have defining personality, that would make her character definite or robust, I mean by this I want to tell you that fuka is heavily relied on external factors for her help, but mimimi atleast tries to be independent or tries to help herself.( If you think this point doesn't make sense, then you definitely have not read punpun, because goodnight punpun is my all time favourite Romance-comedy manga🌚, and in it there is a quote that I absolutely loved, it goes like this "A love to lick each others wound is ugly", it means love in which couples heavily dependent on each other is not good, and that's some how I see fuka and tomozaki relation as of now)

But many may say that, mimimi could get a boyfriend anytime but fuka wouldn't.... So, I want to ask you, why can't fuka get a boyfriend? She is cute, she is quite, she reads books, she is a typical dream girl of boys, but why isn't she popular like mimimi or like other girls, and I think being introvert doesn't work as excuse, I have seen many girls like fuka, who are popular but you know why fuka isn't, it because she can't Express herself, she can't understand herself begin with where as mimimi understand her convoluted feelings and try to accept herself, and hence she didn't cried after the rejection from tomozaki, she is mature but do you really think fuka can overcome rejection or wouldn't cry when she is pushed down..... My father said once, that in a romantic relationship, 1+1=2 wouldn't work but where relation becomes 1+1=11, it is relation for life.
Thank you for reading all this rant about my feeling, thanks.

This is one of my favorite BJ albums, as well as one of my favorite concept albums. I know the theme mostly encapsulates the life of people who grew up post-WWII or during the Cold War, a time when you could no longer inherit the kind of life your parents had, as Wikipedia quotes. But I feel like there are really only a handful of songs that really work with that theme (Allentown, Goodnight Saigon, Pressure to an extent) and the rest don’t really make sense. I had a theory that it was kind of structured like a play, act I being Allentown through Goodnight Saigon, intermission being She’s Right On Time because it’s a super random Christmas song, and act II being A Room of Our Own through Where’s the Orchestra. The problem is that the album isn’t really in story structure (that I know of) and the whole theory hinges on the fact that Where’s the Orchestra is the last song. Anyway, the point of this post is to ask if anyone else knows the meaning behind more of the songs and how they connect the album under one theme? Or theories?

https://imgur.com/a/ryIBq6F
u/PlentyComfortable239 Thank you for the cute vintage kitty card from 1979! So neat that your Grandma gave them to you, it makes carding fun to pass down some history, right? I love your positive energy! Wow, I dig your affinity for live jazz…I used to listen to live jazz back in college but haven’t heard any lately. I really like all the appreciation for jazz in the film La La Land! Thank you for your encouraging words offering love & hope & the neat stickers! You asked if anything “exciting” will be happening for me. I wouldn’t say it’s “exciting” lol but I enjoy crafting & take lots of library crafting classes. Most recently, I took a block printing class & designed my own stamps! That was super fun! I also created a “resin galaxy” that was awesome to do at the library because dealing with sticky resin at home can be a real pain so I prefer limiting my messes to the library haha! Hope you’re enjoying your new city & that you keep finding lots of cool places to explore!
u/tiredpantyhose Thank you so much for the neato Alice in Wonderland card & your kind wishes! Such fun artwork. :) I would totally dig checking out your husband’s corny jokes lol! Corny jokes can just make a blah day a little better, right? Here are a few for you: Hear about the pony that needed a glass of water? He was a little horse. Why did the police arrest the turkey? They suspected fowl play. Why do melons get married in church? Because they cantaloupe. ;) Happy spring, kind friend!
u/Powerful_Cobbler_215 Thank you for the Aloha postcard with your lovely excitement at passing on someone’s cards! That was so thoughtful of you to take your Goodwill stash & actually practice “goodwill”!!! :) Wishing you a sweet & sunny spring!
u/Justined0414 Thank you so much for the birthday postcard with your kind wishes! I appreciate you thinking of me & hope that the sunshine you sent my way comes right back to you, sweet soul! Hope you have moments as sweet as you!
u/lemonbeets911 Thank you for the pretty Crater Lake National Park postcard that you decorated so nicely with the fun stickers! Hope you have a gorgeous spring!
u/Sable__ Thanks for the cute Winnie the Pooh postcard! How amazing that you witnessed a shooting star - I never have but that’s a dream! So glad you were able to have such a fabulous experience! Hope you’re able to check out the upcoming total solar eclipse!
u/omggallout x 6 Thank you for the gorgeous artsy card from the Farmer’s Market & for introducing me to a talented artist! I totally agree with you about the mass cards available online lol. I can’t buy those either. I love that you support small businesses & independent artists! I also love the cute floral card featuring cool vintage recipes you sent & can’t wait to try some of them. They all look super fun & so unique! Thanks for the cuuute SG, Winnie the Pooh, mental health, & women in Art postcards! I’ve only seen the first season of “Stranger Things” so I need to catch up! You asked about my fave shows. They include “Mad Men”, “Downton Abbey”, “Breaking Bad”, “Community”, “The Office”, “Modern Family”, and most recently, “Beef” (this fun one caught me by surprise!). I’m open to lots of genres but am particularly drawn to dramas. :) Thanks also for the sweet stickers. :) Wishing you lots of joy as you hunt for treasures at upcoming Farmer’s Market excursions!
u/GhostChild25 Thanks for the hilarious bird expletives postcard hahaha! So fun. I appreciate you sending this fun, quirky card my way & hope you have a sweet spring!
u/HeyMorganM Thank you for the super cute teddy bear birthday postcard with your lovely washi & sticker decorations! Love your positive spirit! I appreciate you thinking of me on my birthday & hope that you will have an awesome birthday as sweet as you, kind friend!
u/FelineIntuition Thank you for the Queen of Carthage postcard! It makes me wonder if queens think they’ll be taken less seriously if they smile in their portraits lol! Hope you have a royal spring!
u/Keqani Thank you for thinking of me with the adorable The Tale of the Princess Kaguya postcard! So cute! I appreciate your kind wishes & hope your spring is sweet & sunny!
u/rosiealeo1 Thank you for this precious Loupaper chick & bunny postcard! I’d never seen it before & it is just too cute!!!! The illustrations are awesome. Hope your little one will be dressed as a chick at some point during spring lol - I recall how fun it was when my niece was a baby and I could make her dress up as anything I wanted hahaha! Now she’s a teenager so it’s too late. There is something adorable about little kids in chick costumes!!! Thank you for thinking of me & helping me build my lovely Loupaper collection!! Wishing y’all an egg-cellent spring, sweet friend!
u/a5k2h5 Thank you for your positive energy & the wonderful affirmations, which I will continue to reflect upon as often as possible! The mouse in its superhero costume is hilarious & the typewriter is so cute! Thank you for your efforts at spreading so many positive vibes. Here is an affirmation for you that I found particularly profound: "Make way for the unprecedented and watch your reality rearrange yourself.” - Poet Yrsa Daley-Ward Wishing you a breathtakingly beautiful present & future, kind friend!
u/mypetitmal Thank you so much for the super pretty celestial-themed card - I stared at it for ages! It had a calming effect on me, as do all your sweet, heartfelt cards! It’s always a great day when I hear from you, sweet friend! You asked about my V-Day. I have a wonderful boyfriend, but he has a chronic illness & was unable to spend any time with me. So I checked out a chocolate “tasting” class at the library that night. The dark chocolate was so much better than I thought it would be, ha! I usually prefer milk so it was nice to experience some decadent dark chocolate for a change. Hope all went well with the appointment you mentioned. Glad you were able to enjoy some coffee - you deserve a treat as warm & as sweet as you! I was also touched to hear about your meet-up to support the community. Your compassion knows no bounds, beautiful soul! I admire your drive & efforts to make the world a more loving, kind place. Thank you for your gracious thoughts - you absolutely exude the same wonderful vibes for me, & I’m so happy & grateful to have your friendship/awesome hugs! Wishing you sunny skies & smiles this spring, Beautiful! xoxo
u/AlfredTheButt-ler Thank you for the precious St. Patrick’s Day card featuring the crazy cuuuuute baby birds! I was touched with your desire to connect with lost loved ones. I’m so there with you on the weather in our state - seriously just fed up. I swear I’m going to “summer” elsewhere one day, if I can get my material life in order lol! But I think you’re being extremely modest with the wish for a marketable skill…it seems to me that JUST with your mail/kindness sending prowess, you obviously have loads of them! Not just organizational skills! You’re infinitely kind & caring - and that’s honestly so rare these days although I think that should be a bare minimum requirement for any type of endeavor!! You asked for my 3 wishes. I should have clarified that these wishes come after an automatic bonus of world peace so we can focus on what’s really important - ourselves. Just kidding haha!! But yes, assuming we’re gifted world peace, I’ll then take 1) eternal youth & beauty because I’m vain & shallow like that 2) a house of my own where I can have my own art studio so I don’t have to lug all my carding stuff back and forth to the library 3) to be effortlessly creative. Thank you for sending love my way! Hope you have a supremely sunny spring!
u/Strong-Finger-6126 Thank you for the cute blank smileys which will be awesome to pass on! Keep smiling, kind friend!
u/ninajyang x 2 Thank you for the beautiful birthday & coffee Loupaper postcards! I love how you would lounge in the sun as a royal kitty and that is HILARIOUS & so creative that you, as a royal kitty, would want your own pets!!! Hahaha that’s so cuuute!!! Like you, I would wanna be pampered all day long so I’ll take manis, pedis, & facials made with all kinds of fancy MILK (goat, oat, you name it!!)! And I would refuse to walk anywhere - I would insist on being carried on the shoulders of my employees in a fancy bed all decked out with fluffy pillows! Thank you for indulging me with your fun thoughts! Wishing you safe & happy travels (wish I had your jet-settin’ life!!), dearest Nina!
u/chiquita61 Thank you for the darling “Tea time” card - how I love the decorations & the super cute 3D tea bag/cut outs!!! Thank you also for the sweet stickers & cranberry apple tea, which looks so refreshing!!! Your positive energy just came popping out of this fun card - thank you for thinking of me! Wishing you the creamiest of clotted cream along with your delicious tea scones!
u/WickedMa There really is nothing wicked about you lol! You are the sweetest soul, and that comes across so strongly with all of the cuuuute cards you send!!! This bunny Easter card is just darling, as are you for thinking of me!!! Thank you for the insanely cute stickers as well! BTW I’m super excited to report that the library is hosting AN ADULT LITERARY-THEMED EASTER EGG HUNT NEXT WEEK! For years, I’ve been dragging my niece & nephews to Easter egg hunts so I’m thrilled to finally get some Easter egg love of my own! ;) I appreciate your constant love so very much & hope you have a fabulous Easter too!
u/kittycatcon You made my day twice - the day you selected me to be the recipient of this perfect “My Melody & Kuromi” card, & the day I received this treasure! It’s even more beautiful in person. This illustration is stunning. These cuties honestly make you appreciate the little magical moments in life, like connecting with friends who were once strangers, all through the mail! I appreciate you sending me this sweet card, which is now one of my all-time faves, & your happy vibes! Hope you settle in nicely to your new place & that it brings you lots of joy!
u/Pollotino Thank you for the sweet postcard featuring the girl holding the bunny! Hope you find the best apartment at the best price & that your new place, when you do find it, is a bastion of peace & comfort!
u/Mediocre_Radish_7216 Thank you for this insanely cuuuute leprechaun & smiling balloon card! These smiling balloons are to-die-for precious! You’re a born storyteller, my friend. I was smiling & giggling so much while reading your SIDESPLITTING, incredibly funny story of eating the inedible decorative apple in front of Ms. Posh LMAO!!!! I’ll bet that Ms. Posh just loves having you around purely for her own entertainment hahaha! If I were her, I would have honestly been so charmed by you & your heartwarming humility! Hope you don’t mind that I’m featuring the story in a highlighted pic for others to enjoy as well. :) You are so absolutely adorable & charming for sharing your stories with me! You’re so full of life, authentic, & just so entertaining!! Thanks also for the sweet hamrock sticker surprise you enclosed in the fun little washi/memo “compartment” you so creatively & cleverly created! Love this idea! Thank you for making my currently boring life so rich with your awesome stories!
u/CapnCobbler This bright, beautiful sun card makes me so happy, thank you! I absolutely love it, & the stunning Whitman quote you included, which is so profound that I have to share here: “Keep your face always toward the sunshine, and the shadows will fall behind you.” Truth!! I also love how you decorated the card with the word “Shine” for further inspiration! Thanks also for the pretty feather sticker. I really appreciate you sending sunshine my way & hope you have the sweetest, sunniest spring!
u/SweetyDarlingLulu x 2 Thank you for thinking of me with the fun dragon St. Patrick’s Day card, the cute dragon birthday card, & all your good wishes! I think I missed a post/announcement - are you a dragon enthusiast lol? I love it when people are passionate about certain topics! Your enthusiasm came blaring through! Hope you had a 17th full of luck & love!
u/laura_eva Thank you for the cute baby chick Easter card - what a sweetie, as are you for sending such joy my way! Thanks also for the pretty bird extra postcard to pass along. So many bird enthusiasts in our sub here, looking forward to sending him to a nice home! Hope your Easter is full of radiant roses & dazzling daisies!
u/seaofstars Thank you for one of the most gorgeous cards I have EVER received - so bright, full of color, & festive! I love it so much!!! My joy at gazing upon this beauty tripled when I read your heartfelt fortune for me, brimming with hope! Thank you for that - I really needed it! I so appreciate the time you took to write out my fortune in such depth complete with the signs and details on the tarot spread. Your encouragement & positive vibes mean a lot to me! Thanks again for the fun offer & for your fortune-telling savvy! Wishing you a future filled with love, laughter, & hope, sweet friend!
u/hoolu123 x 2 Thank you for the HILARIOUS Teddy Bear postcard, which is a real gem despite your obvious lack of love for it LMAO!! And I absolutely love the coloring postcard from Paris, ooh-la-la! I love to color & this series is one I definitely haven’t seen so I really appreciate it! Hope you had a fabulous time in the City of Love & that you enjoyed some decadent treats while abroad!
u/sourshrimpmaiden Thank you for the exquisite postcard of The Japanese Bridge featuring my favorite cherry blossoms! And I LOVE your gorgeous cherry blossom artwork!! You are so very talented! :) I was tickled by the fun fact that you shared, that “the first cherry blossom trees that were planted in the US was on March 27th, 1912” because that is my birthday (well at least the month and day hahaha, otherwise I’d be dead by now)!!! I’ve always been drawn to them because they’re just so pretty but now they mean even more to me. Thank you for brightening my day with your pretty art & friendly vibes! Hope you have a spectacular spring!
u/talkingishard33 Thank you for sharing your book recommendation with me - I look forward to checking it out!! Thank you also for the super cute stamp stickers! I highly recommend anything by Amor Towles. His book “The Gentleman in Moscow” & “The Lincoln Highway” are my faves! I also LOVE “A Tree Grows in Brooklyn” by Betty Smith. Wishing you fabulous reads, friend!
u/on1oman1ac Thank you for the beautiful illustrated “Go Places” postcard with your cute decorations & all the delicious-sounding Filipino dishes you described! I’m also obsessed with your cuuute, tiny handwriting - it’s so cute I just wanna hug it lol!!!! I wish I could write so magically mini like you! Hope you have a wonderful spring full of your fave foods, sweet friend!
u/raspberrypoppyseed x 3 Wow!! I felt so pampered with your beautiful, glittering gold envelope and all the gorgeous cards you included! Thank you! Thank you so much! They are all so elegant - the beautiful blue bird card is such a stunner! Thank you also for the kind birthday wishes, & the pretty, bright star-themed card along with the fabulous flair rhyme you wrote for me with your ChatGPT assistant! It’s darling! I really like your stickewashi decorations & your fancy personalized username stamp - that is just so elegant with the mini envelope & your pretty name in cursive! Love the font for the stamp too. You’re tempting me to get a personalized stamp too - so much style! I was so impressed by the unique way in which you folded the fish memo into an envelope for the stickers - so creative! Love your sticker style - the floral stickers are so elegant! Thank you for thinking of me with your kind, thoughtful offer to celebrate gold + flair!!! Hope you receive as many smiles & sunshine as you sent my way, kind friend!
u/inconsolableonion Thank you for the fun orange postcard & quirky anecdote about the bald eagle who dropped a fish on the road next to your car LOL!!!! I’m guessing the eagle thought you were super cute & wanted to buy you dinner. ;) I loved how you classified this incident as “just [insert your state name] things”!!! So is the rumor really true, that the wackiest things happen there? Thank you for brightening my day with the fun visual! Hope you stay safe & free of raining fish this spring! :)
u/mostlyblots Thank you for the absolutely adorable Easter card along with the super cute bunny washi & stickers!!! And I just love your calligraphy, wow! That is hilarious about the parsnips & so clever hahaha! I would be strict with the bunny and say that it’s either carrots or liver, up to him! And then when his lip would quiver, I’d say, “Okay, how about cake?” Unbeknownst to him, I would puree the carrots and bake it into a carrot cake. ;) Thank you for thinking of me with the fun card. Hope you have an egg-cellent Easter!
u/MamaBai Thank you for the super inspiring, gorgeous TJ’s card encouraging me to “Ride life like a lightning bolt”!! I love it!! The card itself was so motivating but the real treat was to read your own beautiful words that provided such comfort, peace, & joy! Your enthusiasm for life is just infectious! Thank you! You really are a super special person to spread so much kindness, compassion, warmth, & encouragement to strangers. I was genuinely touched by your reminder that we are all worthy & invaluable. I hope that the joy you spread so selflessly will return back to you a billionfold, you angel!!! :) I’m also excited that you recommended a playlist, which I look forward to checking out! Especially because it came from such a sweet soul!!! Thank you for bringing me sunshine & serenity, you beauty! I hope the world will treat you with as much kindness as you send out!
u/Rand_ston Thank you for the sweet “Thank you” card with the cute sticker party! I can’t wait to pass these sweeties along - thank you so much for your generosity & for thinking of me! Hope you have a beautiful spring!
u/wiifitboard Thank you for this beyond precious vintage-y illustrated card of the little one with the hole in his pants lol!!! Wherever did you find this gem?!? I also love the George Gershwin stamp - never seen it before! Thank you!! Hope you have a sunny, sassy spring!
u/duttonemelia Thank you for the cheerful St. Patrick’s Day shamrock card & all the good vibes you sent my way! Wishing you a pot of gold & perfectly ripe avocados, sweet friend!
u/FancyKiddens Thank you for the super fun Tony the Tiger upcycled postcard with all the fun facts! That would have been hilarious if “Elmo the Elephant” would have been the mascot instead. And it makes me wonder if Elmo from Sesame Street would have a different name/or even exist at all had Tony the Tiger gotten the shaft! Like a weird domino effect! I love learning about the history of popular culture so thank you for the cool history lesson!!! Wishing you cute baby chicks this spring, Darlin’!!
u/Elley_bean All I can think is…if this chick popping out of its egg card & stickers are this insanely cuuute, how cute must Elley bean be?!? Sight unseen, I just wanna pinch your cute cheeks, forgive me for saying so hahaha! Such adorable vibes could only come from the most adorable person! I’ll bet you always light up the lives of everyone around you in person, if you do so, this effortlessly, via mail! Thank you for making me smile & for brightening my day like you did! I hope you have a beautiful Easter!
u/rennbrig x 2 Thank you for the pretty bird card & your gorgeous new stationery card! So fancy! So fine! Exquisite choice, my friend! You write in style. :) I really like how your name is embossed (if that’s what it is lol) in gold & the floral print is so upscale! I loved learning that you’re into “House of Cards” - I am too!! But I have yet to finish it. I started it some years back & then fell behind when it returned. The only scene I recall from memory is when you know who shoved you know who off the subway platform!! That was one of the most intense scenes I have ever seen in tv/film history! Did you enjoy the later seasons as much as the earlier ones? Thank you for reminding me that I need to catch up! May as well start over. :) I’m in the middle of “Madam Secretary” right now. Seen it? Wishing you a spring full of thrilling, mind-bending shows, friend!
u/Kaposia Thank you for the beautiful card featuring Burke’s Book Store! I just love this series of postcards - the illustrations are just stunning! Hope you have a wonderful spring full of the best reads!
u/Hellonicetomeetyouuu Thank you for the precious “Meowgical” postcard that you decorated with such cute stickers & washi! I just loved reading how you’d lead a life as a royal kitty lol! You have fabulous taste, friend! I love how you’d require the affection of the King & Queen with goodnight kisses hahaha! What a way to make them YOUR subjects. ;) Also loved your affinity for comfy PJs. You are too cute! I would totally wanna lead that lush life you described. The only thing I would add - a personal court jester to entertain me with jokes/shows. ;) Thank you for thinking of me & for the spectacularly fun answer to my prompt! Hope you have a spring full of comforting delights like chocolate covered bunnies!