Hello Kemetic ! Yesterday's thread brought a lot of good stuff forward, and I realized that this is no longer a place I am suppose to be. And that's okay! Instead of leaving on a low note, I wanted to thank the community for how much it has helped me in the past years, when I came back to reddit it was one of only a handful or subs I returned to, and I'd planned to stay until the whole site hopefully goes down and rids humanity of itself! Unfortunately that isn't what's best for either myself or the new direction of the sub anymore, so I figured it's the time to part ways before more conflict. I'll still be around, writing/discussing about Egypt and especially Setesh, academically, objectively, in depth, and from the perspective of Ancient Egypt, finding and sharing all the sources I can and such, but I've accepted that is not what this sub is for. Please do feel free to reach out and chat privately as well!
To ALL users of this sub of ANY path, I really wish you the best. This is one of the nicest new age communities I've ever been apart of, and one of the only kemetic ones I've even found active. The problem rests with me, my lack of apathy, and my misplaced sense of responsibility, not this sub. It's something I'll continue to work on and maybe once completed I can return.
Before I go I'll drop my Setesh list again for those who are interested:
The desert and night sky are the realms of Setesh, so the best place to do such magic would be in the desert at night. His main astronomical symbol is the Big Dipper, specifically with it "pouring out" over the earth. If you cannot do it under the Dipper in such a position I would recommend having an image of it to focus on. Food wise the favorite of Setesh has always been lettuce, so it couldn’t hurt to offer some. He has been associated with both the drunkenness of alcohol and with the waters of Nwt, meaning beewine or water are both good to utilize. As the god of outside, foreign things, meteoric rock falls under the domain of Setesh and can be used in ritual/ceremony. Gold is also applicable due to his association with Nubt, the town of gold. His other main colors are red, blue, and yellow (modern purple as well). Finally, I recommend taking inspiration from older texts or from places dedicated to Setesh, such as the Pyramid Texts.
Recommended Resources
• A Lexicographical Study of the Ptolemaic Texts in the Temple of Edfu by Penelope Wilson
• Ancient Egyptian Astronomy: Ursa Major Symbol of Rejuvenation by Allan Ernest
• Deconstructing the Iconography of Seth by Ian Taylor
• Early Dynastic Egypt by Toby Wilkinson
• Egyptian Interests in the Oases in the New Kingdow and a New Stela for Seth from Mut El-Kharab by Colin Hope and Olaf Kaper
• Everyday Life in Egypt in the Days of Ramesses the Great by Pierre Montet
• Fantastic Animals Scenes at Beni Hassan by Samar Kamal and Engy Kilany
• Flint and the Northern Sky by Carolyn Graves-Brown
• Horemheb the Forgotten Pharaoh by Charlotte Booth
• Images of Set by Joan Lansberry
• Interpreting Ancient Egyptian Narratives: A Structural Analysis of the Tale of Two Brothers, the Anat Myth, the Osirian Cycle, and the Astarte Papyrus by Martin Pehal
• Matmar by Guy Brunton
• Naqada by Flinders Petrie et. al.
• On the ‘Immortality’ of the God Seth by Francois Gaudard
• Pesesh-Kef Knife by Joan Lansberry
• Philosophy of Religion by William Rowe
• Redeeming the Egyptian God of Darkness by Ryan Scott (me)
• Seth as a Foreigner in Protodynastic Egypt by Rachael Mayoh
• Seth is Baal by Niv Allon
• Seth, God of Confusion by Herman te Velde
• Seth, God of Power and Might by Eugene Cruz-Uribe
• Seth: A Misrepresented God in the Ancient Egyptian Pantheon? By Philip Turner
• The 2001-2 Excavations Mut El-Kharab in the Dakhleh Oasis, Egypt by Colin Hope
• The Ancient Egyptian Coffin Texts by Raymond Faulkner
• The Badarian Civilization by Guy Brunton and Gertrude Caton-Thompson
• The Conflict of Horus and Seth from Egyptian and Classical Sources by John Griffiths
• The Development of Religion and Thought in Ancient Egypt by James Breasted
• The Early History of Heaven by J. Edward Wright
• The Egyptian Was-Scepter and Its Modern Analogues by Andrew Gordon and Andrew Gordon (not a typo)
• The Monuments of Seti I by James Brand
• The Priests of Ancient Egypt by Serge Sauneron
• The Psš-Kf and the ‘Opening of the Mouth’ Ceremony: A Ritual of Birth and Rebirth by Ann Roth
• The Pyramid Texts by Samuel Mercer
• The Role of the Lector in Ancient Egyptian Society by Roger Forshaw
• The Routledge Dictionary of Egyptian Gods and Goddesses by George Hart
• The Secret Books of the Egyptian Gnostics by Jean Doresse
• The Sites of Seth by Maria Martinez
• The Sky Religion in Egypt: Its Antiquity and Effects by Gerald Wainwright
• Theban Desert Road Survey in the Egyptian Western Desert vol. 1 by John Darnell
• Two Decorated Blocks from the Temple of Seth in Mut El-Kharab by Olaf Kaper
• Which Seth? Untangling Some Close Homonyms from Ancient Egypt and the Near East by Lloyd Graham
Dua Setesh and you all! Good luck!

Hello! This is my first post here so I hope thus doesn't break the "no problem player post" rule since it is about the running the game with players at my table.
I run virtual games of D&D through text, as I don't prefer voice for virtual games, and I've noticed a lot of sidetalk during combat and encounters. That's usually fine. It's not disruptive. We play over text so it can just happen in a different channel. Everyone wins.
Recently I've been noticing a large amount of metagaming that has me worried and is directly impacting MY enjoyment of the game.
One player in particular likes to optimize their character and it works okay within the group dynamic, so that isn't an issue. However I have noticed times when this player counts monster HP and declares whenever they see a discrepancy. This is usually because they dont know about resistances or immunities that i describe and they ignore. They also like to try and be helpful by providing "advice" for other players that the rest if my table largely is fine with, but it has led to them pretty much talking through everyone's turn.
While I'm fine with players who want to pay attention and engage, this behavior has led to the opposite with them not engaging and loudly (as loudly as you can over text) declaring when a scene or fight is a "cutscene fight" to them. This is a fight that they feel they have little impact on. EX: Reducing an enemy with 44 hp to 4 hp in 1 round and then considering the fact they can't 1 round enemies too difficult/makes them irrelevant
Other players don't share the same views on these encounters and also feel this player has largely the most impact on combat (despite them claiming to not have any agency or importance while counting HP) due to being optimized. Other players also lean into metagaming more than I would like, and often ask me to post monster features and stats during the combat.
All of these is NOT really something I enjoy. I don't see my job as DM to be an antagonist and kill them with monsters, but i also don't see a reason to game-ify combat to the point where the narrative stakes are buried. Most of my encounters are made ad-hoc when tensions and negations get to a place where it is necessary, and the map is largely found during RP. The stats are preplanned and usually just official monsters reskinned, with the names filed off, or with 1:1 changes in immunities, resistances, and damage types.
I would appreciate advise in how to reduce this severe of metagaming without being too strict/too restrictive on my player's playstyles. I've tried communicating that I have a particular style of DMing, but it continues to rebuffed by comments like "but my other DM does it another way" or "it just makes more sense to me". The most valid of which is "if you post the feature we have a better idea of how to interact with it" but I have attempted to communicate that I don't really care about the exact mechanics AND have been lenient when the players attempt something out of the box.

This was my first Mother’s Day. My son is the only biological family I’ve met. I think being post partum and the triggers of being a new mom ended with me giving my adopted parents an ultimatum.
It didn’t start at that as first. I tried to ask them questions about my adoption. My “adoption” was done informally in Mexico. They had the doctor write down that I am their bio child and that my adoptive mother gave birth to me. I don’t know if any of this is true, but they didn’t tell me of my adoption until I was 19 and then proceeded to stress the importance of staying quiet because I’m my fathers words, “we will go to jail! Do you want us to go to jail!”
Everytime I ask them questions about my adoption they give me different conflicting answers. I finally told them all the pain this has caused me and how I deserve to know and that I’m going to search and whatever legal troubles they run into is their own fault (they were fully aware adults when they decided to be an accomplice in this) and I’m done feeling guilty for them and trying to comfort them when they are my parents and they should have been there to comfort and help me. They proceeded to ignore me and then follow up with how they can no longer offer me financial support, which I’m financially independent from them.
I responded to my mom saying I’m done. That I want answers on my situation and how sketchy it all sounds. That they cannot play grandma and grandpa to my son if they cannot have a working relationship with me first and be parents to me. That I will not respond to any texts until they start being honest about the situation and give me answers.
They have continued to ignore me.
I cannot believe these people who claim to love me are being this way.
Also, they’re fucking weirdos for not adopting through a legally appropriate way. They don’t see themselves as predatory for “getting around” the adoption process. They say the same thing, “we saved you! You would’ve ended up in the state foster care and it would have been so much worse.” (They’re just reinforcing their own narrative that helps them feel at peace with their decision.)
They act like their my saviors and advocates when no one was their to advocate for little baby me to make sure the appropriate steps were taken. I’m sorry, but if you’re sooo eager to adopt that your willing to do it illegally, your fucking predatory and care more about your own wants then the well being of said child.
I’m hurt but I’m glad to be fucking done.

TW: Abuse Long time lurker, first time poster. This is a complicated, long, and messy situation and I'm on mobile. Sorry. Gonna try and make this short. My(17f) Father(39m) is a complicated person. He believes your first response to misbehaving kids is to yell or threaten them. When he was living with us, he would beat me and my siblings for the smallest reasons. For example, if we took food when we weren't supposed to be in the kitchen. If we lied about anything. If we got bad grades (the oldest kid at the time was in 4th grade).
Every now and again we get into arguments about what he did to us during my childhood. He claims he "doesn't remember" or that I'm making it all up. Despite the fact that my older sister still has a mark he left on her leg over a decade later.
Last night we argued over text. And he ended it by saying that "parents are supposed to be friends with their parents."
I'm disabled. I have arthritis, and a lot of other issues, for both mental and physical. Every time he see me in person, which isn't often or for long, he hounds me about my weight and teeth. I spent Christmas with him in 2020, and for 2 weeks he keep telling my that I was fat and overweight and trying to force me to go to the gym.
I told him last night that it made me uncomfortable and made me feel horrible. He said that how I felt didn't matter. He said my comfort came second to his truth.
WIBTA if I post the screenshots of our conversation on Facebook and tag him?
Edit: He has other kids who go through the same. I just don't want it to get as bad as it did for me. I'm terrified to leave my room and have to force myself out of bed. I don't have contact with the "good side" of the family, but he does. He controls the narrative. My goal is to let everyone else know what's really going on, but I only have access/in contact with his yes-men.
Edit 2: Forgot to mention that if we block him/cut him off, he calls the cops on my Ma. He's done it 5 times in the last 2 years.

Hey there everyone! I’m Z (he/they) & I’m looking to run a slow-paced, roleplay-heavy game with a focus on queer players & narratives. Experience doesn't matter, I love having newer players in my games!
I know this is long, but please read it throughly! The application isn't much shorter and I don't want to waste your time. I will be keeping the application up and reposting through the week, so there's no rush!
I also really shouldn't have to say this, but considering the only comments I got on my first post were negative: please don't harass me for wanting to run a safe table for people. Or, if you do, at least acknowledge the irony. . . This is a handicapped parking space; I know it's empty, but so are the dozens of spaces around it.
A little more about me - I'm 32 and I’ve been playing since 2017, mostly as a DM. Before the pandemic I ran a lot of local store games and ‘how to DM events’ for adults, as well as library games for kids. It took me a while to adjust to playing online but now I prefer it, as it’s allowed me to find a whole new love for the game playing with different kinds of people and focusing on intentionally creating a safe space for those who don’t feel comfortable at most tables.
Format - I would like to run weekly voice sessions on discord (with optional cameras) using roll20 as our VTT & the option to roleplay via text on the server throughout the week, with either other PCs or NPCs - I also like doing lore drops this way, or giving previews to other things that are happening in the world. I like dndbeyond for character sheets (and I’m happy to share all my content), but as long as I can see them, you can run them wherever. I am bad about using music bots on discord, so I would love it if someone knew how that all worked and could help with that, otherwise I can share playlists on spotify.
Scheduling - I would like to play anytime between 8am MST in the mornings and let’s say 4pm or so on Saturdays, and again we’d be shooting for every week, but obviously life happens and we might need to take a week off. It would also be lovely if you have a slightly flexible schedule just in case, as I can occasionally play on Sundays or Mondays as well. Sessions can be anywhere from 2 hours to 4 or 5 hours, depending on the amount of roleplay. I leave a lot of space in my game for in-character conversations, so if you are someone who gets bored easily / doesn’t care about the game if it doesn’t directly involve your character, this is not the game for you.
For this reason, I prefer running smaller groups, 3-4 being the sweet spot.
Mechanics - we’re playing 5e* and the asterisk represents all the stupid rules that make the game less fun that I ignore or change. I care more about the story and roleplaying than the mechanics, I very much default to the ‘rule of cool’ or letting the dice decide your fate. I am very much on your side and if it ever feels like I’m not, please let me know. The basics are I don’t make you track food/arrows/ etc. and if you forget or misunderstand something major I’ll remind you or clarify. I also don’t care too much about times for donning / doffing armor and using action economy to pull out a weapon - we’ve all woken up well past our alarm and still made it to work on time; you can get your armor on for that middle of the night combat.
In a similar manner, we’re playing Dragons of Shipwreck Isle* where the asterisk represents all the parts of the adventure that I’m gonna change and try to make more interesting. I would ask for y’all not to metagame and look up the adventure, but mostly because if you’re comparing the module to what I run, it’s not going to line up and it will probably end up frustrating you. I am also looking at other modules as well but instead of listing them all, in the question on the form where I ask if you’ve played this specific module before, please list all of the ones you’ve played instead of just saying yes or no. I don't like feeling like I need to trick my players into playing attention during the game, so I like players who pick up on these details.
Hard lines / veils in game - racism / sexism / homophobia / transphobia are NOT built into my fantasy worlds; we deal with that enough irl. I also don’t fuck with slavery, SA (this includes during combat, assault is assault even if they are a ‘bad guy’) or ERP. Anything sexual will be implied / fade to black, but I would prefer things not get too sexual. I don’t mind in character romance between PCs, but I would appreciate a heads up if you want an NPC romance for your character - and I will be checking in with everyone about your comfort level with this, if you want absolutely no flirting towards your character from any NPC please let me know that as well.
I will also stay away from harming kids / pets / elderly, and anything you would like to list as a hard line (something you don’t want showing up in the game at all) or veil (something that can be alluded to, just not graphically detailed). I will say there are heavy themes of undead present in the module at the beginning, and zombies / undead are a personal favorite monster of mine to use so PLEASE do not apply to this game if you don’t like fighting undead! My descriptions can get graphic at times when it comes to monsters & combat, but I will likely gross myself out before it becomes too gratuitous.
Triggers - even if you don’t think it will come up in game, triggers can unfortunately pop up with silly memes or jokes ooc. If there’s a certain image / idea that totally squicks you out and you don’t want them included ANYWHERE on the server, please let me know! Everyone’s comfort is a top priority to me, and keeping your triggers out of our safe space is really important to me.
Morality - I love moral ambiguity, but I genuinely don’t want any evil aligned characters. This is a collaborative game that requires everyone to work together to some extent; you don’t have to be instant best friends in character, but you will need you to communicate and check in ooc if tensions rise up in character. Play your character true to their actions, but make sure that their actions are fun and interesting for everyone involved, not just you.
I also always allow non-lethal combat options, such as knocking sentient creatures unconscious. I encourage trying to persuade / lie / bargain with those you have captured, but I will not condone outright torture. That said, there will be humanoid bad guys who won’t always be the most reasonable people, and may not collaborate.
Safety Tools - outside of open communication in discussing boundaries & triggers, I encourage the ‘X card’ method - whenever anyone gets uncomfortable and wants to immediately stop a scene, you can send a literal ‘X’ in either the main chat or to me privately and we will stop immediately. Ideally, we can get on the same page easily about comfort levels and everyone here will feel okay coming to me with any issues they have, but we are all human and things can pop up.
Expectations - The only thing I really ask out of y’all as my player is for open communication and I will always try my best to do the same. If something isn’t vibing with you or it makes you uncomfortable, even if it’s something little, please tell me. I expect you to be engaged with the story, and encourage you to keep some sort of notes / inventory / ‘to do list’ for the game. I also would really appreciate feedback - not just for how I run the game, but what you want to see in the game so I can put it in there. If someone’s character is interested in a specific realm of study in history / arcana / nature, I can build that into the lore. Same thing if you want to find a specific item or learn how to do a certain skill - let me know either in or out of character and I’ll try to make it happen!
Starting point - I am intentionally keeping this part loosey-goosey to accommodate players backstories & experiences! Mechanically, you will start at either level 1 or 2 with Point Buy for stats, and I am imagining getting to at least level 5, but it really depends. The loose idea I have right now is that y’all are traveling on a ship from Neverwinter to an island where you will likely be for several weeks in character, but I want to leave the overall ‘why’ up to the individual players and group. It will likely take about a dozen or so sessions, but I am happy to play for as long as my players want to keep doing things in character!
If you haven’t been put off by the amount of text, please click the link below to apply. If you thought this was too much and you skimmed the post to find this link, you’re probably going to get bored before you finish applying lol
best of luck!
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSefOJuSFuzromCph2g6eBmeMEoIEH1t2grCuIbLa6O_i-9CWw/viewform?usp=sf_link

1. Parallelismus Membrorum:

- *Definition:* A rhetorical device where phrases or sentences are structured in parallel form. - *Example:* Create a poem using parallelismus membrorum to emphasize a profound truth or observation. 

1. Rubaiyat:

- *Definition:* A form of Persian poetry with quatrains and a specific rhyme scheme. - *Example:* Write a rubaiyat exploring the themes of love, mortality, or philosophical reflections. 

1. Blues Poem:

- *Definition:* Poetry inspired by the musical and emotional elements of blues music. - *Example:* Craft a blues poem expressing the struggles and resilience of everyday life. 

1. Erasure Poetry:

- *Definition:* Creating poetry by erasing or blacking out existing text, leaving only selected words visible. - *Example:* Create an erasure poem using a page from a newspaper or a novel, transforming it into a new narrative. 

1. Anaphora:

- *Definition:* A rhetorical device involving the repetition of a word or phrase at the beginning of successive clauses. - *Example:* Write a poem using anaphora to convey a sense of urgency or reflection. 

1. Tetractys:

- *Definition:* A five-line poem with a specific syllable count (1, 2, 3, 4, 10). - *Example:* Craft a tetractys exploring the stages of personal growth or a transformative experience. 

1. Sijo:

- *Definition:* A traditional Korean poetic form with three lines, each with fourteen to sixteen syllables. - *Example:* Write a sijo capturing a moment of beauty or introspection. 

1. Blitz Poem:

- *Definition:* A form of poetry with a rapid, stream-of-consciousness style and repetition. - *Example:* Create a blitz poem exploring the chaos and beauty of urban life. 

1. Epitaph:

- *Definition:* A short inscription on a tombstone or a commemorative poem for the deceased. - *Example:* Write an epitaph honoring a fictional or historical figure with a poignant message. 

1. Prothalamion:

- *Definition:* A poem celebrating a forthcoming marriage or wedding. - *Example:* Craft a prothalamion capturing the anticipation and joy surrounding a wedding day. 

Messages between A and B

Context: A reaches out to B after B stopped talking to A for 2 years over a disagreement. A now wants to reconnect with B again. When discussing each other's plans, A mentions that they have been sober for 7 months and that they plan to drink again in the summer. A begins to notice a shift in B's energy towards them in text messages, and perceives this as B misinterpreting A's intentions for reaching out again. A pinpoints B's behaviour to the meme, subliminal messaging, and intentional misspelling of words.
B- Sends Meme which says “Me 5 mins into Alcoholics Anonymous trying to convince everyone to come to the pub”
A- “Listen man I’ve been getting the vibe that you may think me reaching out to you again wasn’t coming from a genuine place. My therapist has been telling me I need to communicate more, so I’m gonna try be as transparent as possible here. I thought there was no point in tryna reach out to you again as you wouldn’t respond, but then you liked my post back on New Year’s Eve, so I was happy and thought maybe there’s a chance we could still reconnect again, but I still wasn’t sure if you were gonna respond so I kept putting it off until I finally messaged you at the end of March. During my meetings we constantly discuss seeking healthy friendships as a pose to my old ones and I knew it just made sense to message you again, you’ve always been the realist out of all our old friendship group, so why not do it now I’m sober…
When I told you I’d been sober since the end of September, and that I will drink in the summer again I said that not because I was looking for drinking mates but because I wanted to be honest with you and myself about my sobriety, I mention it all the time at weekly group meetings. Right now I’m at a space where I don’t really wanna drink and I’m not really as keen as I was before on drinking in the summer like I said to you but the point is, I say I will drink again, because if I do end up drinking in the summer or whenever, I won’t feel as guilty about it, as a pose to me saying I’m staying sober…. If that makes sense? Also I know I wasn’t exactly the best mate to have when drinking so I just wanted to make it clear with where I may be headed, rather than surprise you down the line. If you don’t really like the sound of that, that’s fine I get it, maybe reconnecting again isn’t the best idea. But I just wanted to be as honest and direct as possible, man. I hope you can understand.”
B- “Honestly mate I haven’t given you messaging me again too much thought other than you tryna reconnect.
When we last spoke properly I was just annoyed as I felt like you handle things in a kinda selfish way and I’m ngl I did a thing I’m good at and just ignored you other than talk to you about it. But yeah even though ignored you I haven’t said a bad thing about you to anyone cause I honestly had no bad blood for ya at all.
I can’t promise I’m gonna be available to hang out all the time or anything as I’m working a lot atm plus having the mrs it does limit my time but I was honest when I said I am definitely up for us hanging out again at some point”
A- “I’ll hold myself accountable and admit I was acting selfishly, so I understand why you reacted they way you did looking back. Yh when I spoke to **** about it I got that same impression off him, and it was likewise for me, I spoke good of you and said it was a shame how things turned out.
That’s completely understandable you being busy with work and the Mrs, I never doubted that, and I don’t wanna come across as pushy. My messages earlier came from a place of wanting to address any misunderstandings that you may have had, as I know it can lead to unnecessary resentment or conflict. But from what you’re saying I can now see it’s not the case, so I’m just glad we communicated and are on the same page man ”
B- “Yeah man we’re cool if you’re free next week at some point lmk and we can hang out”
A- “Yh I’ll be real I still get the feeling you think I’m not being genuine. What you gotta understand is me reaching out comes from a place of wanting to find connection again- healthy connection anyways, the going out drinking and all that is only a by-product of it all, and I’d be lying if I said I don’t miss going out club or pub with you, but it’s bigger than that.
Idk if ***** maybe tried to tell you a different narrative (I’ll dis-prove anything if he has), but I cut off everyone at the end of September, I reached my lowest point. Since then I’ve been working on myself I don’t meet anyone I don’t have any social interactions other than when I’m at therapy/group meetings, or talking to people in the gym, and that way I’m able to stay focused and keep my peace. I only do streaks with **** on snap, and when he asked me to meet before I told him no I can’t at the moment, as i’m focused on myself. I don’t want sympathy btw, I’m letting you know how it is, so there isn’t any confusion. When I reached out, this was me coming out of hibernation, more healthy, taking the first step towards interacting with people again- the right people anyways.
I’m happy to meet next week but I have one condition. I’ve been played with enough times to know about that game where they pretend everything’s fine then they strike when you’re least expecting it, and I’m not saying you’re gonna do that but I have trust issues and I’m drained mentally, and I won’t be a part of any unnecessary conflict. So if we’re gonna meet I’m gonna need your word before please, that you’re not gonna try to be passive agressive with me in any shape or form? If you feel a type of way about me, you still don’t believe I’m genuine, I’m more than happy to have an open respectful discussion face to face about it.”
B- “Look mate I’m happy to see you again, it’s been a while but like I said I am really busy, try not to read too much into my replies. I mean what I’m saying”
A- “Apologies for not responding sooner. I’ve been reflecting on the whole situation, trying to be as honest as I can with myself about my intentions. I stand with most of what I said before. I swear I wasn’t lying when I saw you liking my picture in January I wanted to reach out, and I genuinely did keep putting off messaging you until March in fear you wouldn’t respond. When it reached the end of March I told myself I just had to do it as I said. But looking back now, I think I wasn’t being as honest as I thought with myself in regards to my intentions towards messaging you. I definitely wanted to reconnect but I also badly wanted to have a social life and meet people again, (NOT specifically drinking, but understandably the drinking would naturally become a part of it, that’s just how things go).
I feel this other reason became more pressing for me as I became ready to go back to normal life again. But obviously I shouldn’t have had the idea of desperately wanting a social life in mind when messaging you, and actually just messaging you specifically for the sake of reconnecting, to keep the intentions fully genuine. So for that I am sorry. Now I don’t want you to mistake this as me only messaging you again for that sole purpose of having a social life because it was not just that at all, and it genuinely made a big difference not having you as a mate in my life, like I said you were the most real mate I had out of all my mates, and I knew I messed that up, so seeing there was a chance we could be mates again made me real happy.
Obviously in regards to how you perceived my intentions I’ve gathered you are pretty annoyed with me, I can’t change your opinion but I can tell you my truth which I have just said. Unfortunately reconnecting hasn’t worked out so well which I guess I am to blame for with my approach. I think this is God’s sign that it’s not meant to be. I’m sorry I haven’t been as genuine as I thought I was being. I also respect how you never spoke bad of me before even when we weren’t on the best of terms, that demonstrates how real of a mate you were. I don’t have any ill feelings towards you, even if you might do now. I honestly wish you the best on your journey and I’ll always have ratings for you B ”
B- “You what mate good luck yo ya”

Hello! I’ve been trying to get a partner for a specific rp and that didn’t work so here’s everything that I wouldn’t mind doing.
I would be the male in all of these and we would need to discuss the plot. But I generally like romance and slice of life.
DC: - Batman/Catwoman - Batman/Zatanna - Superman/Lois Lane - Superman/Wonder Woman - Nightwing/Star Fire - Mr Miracle/Big Barda
Marvel: - Spider-Man/Mary Jane (any version of Mary Jane so Spinneret included) - Spider-Man/Black Cat - Logan/Jean Grey - Gambit/Rogue
Invincible: - Invincible/Atom Eve
Star Wars: - Anakin/Padme
ATLA/TLOK: - Zuko/Mai
MHA - Todoroki/Momo - Todoroki/Camie - Deku/Ochaco
The ones I want to do the most: - Gambit/Rogue - Batman/Catwoman - Batman/Zatanna - Superman/Wonder Woman - Either MHA
There’s others too but that’s all that I could think of.
About me:

• I have several years of Roleplay experience
• Generally I give Short to Medium responses
• For Narrations I use regular text in third person view
• For Speech I like to put it in quotes
• Anything out of Roleplay I say in parentheses
• I generally also like to match your style so none of my preferences are set in stone
• My time zone is Mountain Time
• For Speech I like to put it in quotes
• Anything out of Roleplay I say in parentheses
• I generally also like to match your style so none of my preferences are set in stone
• I much prefer to Roleplay through here than any other platforms
• My time zone is Mountain Time
• I generally respond whenever I can but if it looks like I won't be able to for a long period of time, I'll send a message saying so
• I also would like to know any triggers for you or any annoyances so I can avoid those to the best of my ability
• Also if there's any problems or issues in what I'm doing please tell me so I can try to fix it or explain why I do what I do

And I think that's it, if there is any questions feel free to ask

Omnivore is a free, open source read-it-later universal app that supports highlights and notes, has RSS and newsletter subscriptions, and imports into Obsidian, Logseq and Notion. Other choices like Pocket, Matter and Instapaper aren't crap, but they do cost, and you run the risk that your carefully cultivated collection could be locked into a closed system. I would only recommend Readies if Kindle integration is a must have for you and you are willing to pay for it.
Omnivore has extensions for each major browser family that let you save an article along with keywords. The reading interface is stripped of ads. For a lot of people, the killer feature of Omnivore is the AI voice narration that's difficult to differentiate from an actual human. There are multiple voices to choose from. Once you're done reading an article you can move it out of your inbox and into an archive that remains available for full text searches.
My full review
Omnivore in the App Store

It's common agreement that the peak so far was the whole Malevoleon Creek narrative. The memes, created story, payoff. It's also agreed that many feel turned off by a lack of impact and agency. Ever since 'the bots returned', nothing really has felt as special. We get orders and nothing changed except a few planets shifting status.
The problem is that we get little information on the why, and the results of our day to day actions. Sometimes a voiceline but that only plays oncd and only after a major, major order.
What is the point of a dungeon master im TTRPGs? To create and share a story. They don't tell the party the cliff notes, they expand on it and create an entire narrative.
Helldivers 2 needs it to get that sense of agency back, and It's not even that hard to pull off. You don't need fancy animations or extra voice acting. All you need is an in-game newsletter, perhaps using the unused console opposite the armory. Regularly produced text+image pages that gives the expanded story, dramatized efforts, and results beyond 'planet is liberated'. A feeling that the universe is alive and not just a simulation.

Ok I know this is kind of a long shot since it’s kind of obscure. I’m remembering a specific video narration of this story but I’ll also settle for the story itself if anyone remembers that.
so I remember this old creepypasta from back in the day, probably from around the time when they had a big boom in popularity, some time in the early to mid 2010s(?) But it could also have been a bit after that. It was on one of the two big creepypasta narrator channels, either Mrcreepypasta or Creepsmcpasta but I think it was the latter.
Anyway it was a story about a group of guys who I think go camping in the woods together, and end up stumbling upon a cabin. There’s a window on the cabin they want to look into for some reason but it’s high up so they boost one guy up to look through. The guy ends up seeing something horrible but I don’t think it actually says what it is, then the guy yells like “MURDER!” or something and they all run. But then afterwards there’s something really wrong with the friend who looked through the window, (I’m not sure what exactly but it’s probably like he’s as white as a sheet and won’t talk or something) anyways the guys leave the forest but realize something is Erin with them as well, like the world around them seems different and people are quiet or refuse to talk to them, the narrator mentions getting dinner with their dad, but he just stares at him with a frown on his face.
I think there might have been some more after that but that’s pretty much the end. Thanks if you read all this and sorry for the long block of text

The familiar sounds of the office fill the ears of the "Adventurer" as he steps into his home away from home. To him "Familiar sounds" means the voices of about three-quarters of the hundreds of employees who work in this building, thanks to the progressive, passive, perpetual boosts to his senses that he has simply always been accruing. He still can't quite hear everything in the office, indeed as powerful as his senses are he can only actively sense enough space around him to be firmly aware of events occurring about half of the building's length and width away from him at a time, but those are still incredibly powerful senses.
Lucas steps past several cubicles and heads to his own with a calm smile on his face. He actually enjoys his job, not because he finds the work fulfilling but because it presents him with a chance to level up his skills and work towards becoming altogether stronger in a hilariously safe environment. The figure sits in his cubicle and logs into his work computer with a bright grin on his face. As he grabs the last pieces of paper in the backlog that was a big problem when he began to work for this company he feels a pang of pride.
The workday is pleasant enough. He successfully finishes the last pile of paperwork that was considered part of the backlog and this effort is celebrated by his direct supervisor and a few of the friends he's made in his department, a group composed of several men and only a few pair of women, who have been working here for years but lacked the abilities he possesses that allow him to grind out progress at a rapid rate and allow him to improve the work he does every single day without fail. The news quickly spreads throughout the office, and various people, including other departmental supervisors and managers, come to him and congratulate him.
When the day ends Lucas is one of the first people out the door. This is commonly expected Lucas-like behavior at this point so no one bats an eye at it. The figure works and then leaves, and he seems to have an incredibly strict policy about work-life balance to the point that no one from the office has seen his apartment or even seen him outside of the office aside from on social media.
The lad walks towards a nearby mall even as he checks his phone. When the decently cautious man is sure he's not being watched he uses his inventory to swap outfits, changing into something much more casual than his work uniform so he can do his equivalent of trolling. His clothes go from being the professional outfit someone might expect to see an accountant in, to the much more casual clothes of someone who works at a Game Station the local equivalent of a Game Stop.
The minute the figure reaches the mall he relaxes and steps into it with a smile on his face as he is suddenly and powerfully aware of events going on all around him now that the sounds he's been passively hearing for the last few minutes are not muffled by layers of solid American construction. The mall is a favorite haunt of his, a place where there are enough people that even if something goes awry he can pretty easily escape in the chaos and commotion that any sort of hostile actions would necessarily cause. Still, to the figure's credit he has not been caught yet.
The thief begins his training by carefully studying the department store he's in. He can be a bit bolder now than he could weeks ago, as in the time since he began to hone this skill he's enhanced it in such a way that he can teleport objects directly into his inventory, which is a tremendous improvement even if he can't take anything bigger or heavier than a cleaver. He eventually spots a teenager with a wallet that is just visible out of the corner of his pockets. Lucas diligently uses "Observe" on him and the powerful skill is strong enough now that Lucas can use it to determine someone's affiliations. When the young adult spots that the teen belongs to a gang he decides it's worth taking his potentially ill-gotten gains.
The clever trickster points a single finger in the direction of the teen's pocket and silently casts the handy spell. A thin line of energy lances out of his extended digit and sails through the air toward the teenager. When the teen begins to move Lucas hisses in annoyance and expends a bit more magical energy to take advantage of the first skill he's gained as a result of an attribute hitting 50: arcane manipulation.
Days ago the young adventurer's passion for magic and healing resulted in two classes leveling up on the same day: mage and white mage. This resulted in his intelligence going from 49 to 52, and as a result of that he gained the ability to manipulate magical energy, so long as he can detect the magic in question and is willing to spend some magic of his own. In this world, where the figure is reasonably certain that no other magical beings exist, this means that to hone this skill the wizard needs to manipulate his own magic. Still, that hasn't stopped the young professional from tirelessly doing just that.
With a significant amount of focus the mage is able to manipulate the thin beam and twists and turns it so that it circles around the teen before snaking into his pocket and striking the young gangster's wallet. When Lucas feels the wallet enter his inventory he chuckles and makes his way out of the department store. The rest of this particular bout of training is filled with similar feats of arcane finesse and hilariously minor acts that will steal from those willing to enact violence on others in exchange for money. Lucas's clever usage of his skills coupled with his willingness to act in stunningly petty and annoying ways make him great at harassing those he designates his foes. Lucas, lacking an ability to kill those he fights thanks to a drawback affecting him, has thus far refused to actually engage those he has marked as his foes in direct battle but his desire to annoy them has led to willingly target people associated with criminal groups with some of his spatial magic.
In hours the figure is back home and he is toying with the newest toy he's received from his gacha system. A guitar sits on his lap and he fiddles with the instrument, even he listens to a video about how to tune the thing. Lucas is experimenting with something, and behind the tablet he gained some time ago is a book that contains information on tuning guitars. The tablet is in use, recording what the man is up to. An app is in use and it records the sounds the guitar chords make. The self-taught musician relies on some of his new skills for this, as he has only recently gained the "Guitar" and "Guitar Maintenance" skills, and he got them at different times so they are different levels. Nonetheless, the figure patiently records himself, occasionally stopping the recording and examining it. He is diligently using his long-term planning skills and sticking to his broad plan. At the same time the figure patiently uses magic and steadily hones the "Mage" class, using his magic skills to farm multiple sources of experience while adhering to the schedule he has informally given himself.
Eventually the next day rolls around and the figure, predictably, gets out of his apartment and goes to work. If you had explained the concept of "Jumping" to Lucas a year ago and asked him if he thought so much of it would be just working a 9-5 job he'd not have believed you and yet in the context of his experience with the unusual profession a stunning amount of time has just been him being a regular employee of a perfectly mundane business.
Time continues to pass for the would-be adventurer at a steady pace. In this mundane world a figure with legitimate supernatural abilities is a uniquely powerful presence, and this is especially true of one that is determined to keep his head down and nose clean. Lucas's determination to live a regular, relatively risk-free life does not stop him from living, but it does stop him from suffering from some sort of "Middle School Second Year Syndrome" as a result of the fact that he has gained trainable superpowers. Instead of going mad with power or gaining an unhealthy mentality Lucas has just enough knowledge of how jumping works to know that while he might be a big fish in this world he is not a big fish in other worlds like Fallout, The Elder Scrolls, or even something as aggressively hostile and oppressive as the general setting of Minecraft is.
If an objective, impartial onlooker viewing Lucas's life is given the chance to describe the sort of "Television Show" that they are watching, they'd say it could easily be considered slice-of-life. For the first few months of his time here the most exciting times are the rare moments he adds something new to his slowly expanding list of activities and the even more slowly growing list of things he can do, such as when he begins to walk the streets of the city he lives in at night and cast healing, positive, restorative magic on the sleeping homeless people he encounters. This activity ultimately earns him the peculiar title of "Unsung Saint", a title which enhances the effectiveness of his restorative or otherwise beneficial magic on those not aware of the fact that he is using magic on them.
Days of work, training, and controlled, planned forays into new pastimes, turn into weeks of steady and anticipated progress. Weeks of steady and anticipated progress turn into months of upward mobility and the healthy establishments of new baseline feats. That said, eventually progress slows and becomes more difficult for the jumper in a world as relatively safe, for supernatural beings, as this one. It doesn't take terribly long for Lucas to go from a somewhat predictable, fairly focused figure who is very specialized in a number of areas, to a somewhat more well-rounded figure with a steadily increasing repository of skills and abilities, thanks to a subtle shift in growth strategies.
​Just a few days short of eleven months into his stay in this jump, the jumper is facing a new foe but is participating in an activity he's come to enjoy; sparring.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I dodge a well-aimed right-handed punch intended for my face, though thanks to my agility I easily had enough time to dodge it, It took a long time, from my viewpoint, for it to get close to me so long enough that I only let it get this close on purpose. I'm holding back in terms of my speed and strength but my opponent, a friend I made at the gym a few weeks ago, doesn't need to know that. I have way too many supernatural advantages for it to be a fair fight if I don't hold back.
I give my opponent enough time to register that I've dodged the blow before I begin to telegraph, purposefully, my next attack. I purposefully overextend my left arm and launch a powerful, but slow, strike. The man grits his teeth and moves to intercept my strike. He is fast enough to position his arm in front of it but that is still a mistake. I guide my blow into his arm and watch as he lets out a sincere, pained, grunt. Even with me holding back I still allow DPS to work its magic, and that perk coupled with both my trained and perk-enhanced strength is enough for me to deal him a decently powerful blow.
I retract my fist with a sly smile and note that the bars that cover my field of view are all going up at different rates. The bar for "Brawler", a class that's the result of "Fighter" giving me access to a new class when it hit level 10, my currently equipped class, is going up at a healthy clip as I spar with this man, as is the bar for "Precision Strikes" and "Acting", some of my skills. Most of the things going up at a decent clip are affected by "Jack of All Trades" a perk thatreduces the time and effort it takes for me to train up new skills to around the level of my average. Most of my other bars are only slightly going up, but this is acceptable. This sort of training is vital, long term, for my very survival, and thanks to my perks is pretty easy for me to do.
Behind me I hear a familiar voice cheering; Hannah's. The lovely redhead has begun to accompany me to the gym, but this is a somewhat recent development. Before a few weeks ago we only occasionally saw each other on Saturdays at the cafe she worked at, though we have been texting buddies ever since we met. Marcus, my sparring partner, grins savagely at me as he listens to my friend and gym buddy's cheers.
"I can't let you show me up in front of your girl, Lucas. We're not close like that." Marcus tells me, though the words are insincere. Marcus is a friend of mine, one who has even tasted my food, and that's something I don't let others do as much as I once did, barring people who go to the soup kitchen when I'm one of the volunteers on duty. My cooking can now do some decent stuff so I don't want to get anyone who isn't an ally or someone I need in my pocket overly reliant on my skills. I grin at the muscular bruiser of a warrior and dart back before gesturing for him to come at me like he means it. The man lets out a hearty laugh as he begins to pursue me. He is a touch taller than me and he has muscular, wide arms that take up a lot of space.
I watch, diligently, as he swings them at me when he is in the martial sweet spot of being close enough to hit me with a fully extended fist and being far enough away for me to strike back in an effort to preempt or counter his blow. I dart forward even as he stops advancing and duck underneath the strike before I use an active skill from my "Dancer" class to infuse my agility into my strength and hit him with a blow that disorients him. He steps back, a look of pain and confusion on his face as I step forward and move close enough to hit the man with a much softer blow to the chest. I feel his solid muscles block part of the harm done to him, but the blow is still solid enough that I watch his HP lower.
He gasps in pain and staggers back, and I smile at him and sense my triumph. He's only lost a small portion of his total hit points, but for normal people, one's total stock of HP is an abstraction of their physical health. For me, my HP serves as a skillful shield that protects me at all times, and for me to fall in battle someone has to whittle away my entire bar before they take me out. In fact, right now my HP is not maxed out; earlier I took a hit from Marcus that I'm still recovering from.
I take a step forward before Marcus signals that he needs a break. I laugh, the sound filling the part of the gym we're fighting in, and stop approaching the man. Hannah walks up to the ring and offers me some of her water as I walk toward one of the corners of the small ring. I silently gesture that I'll accept it and she tosses it at me. When the object is in my hand I use subtle telekinesis to mess with my boxing glove just enough to more easily hold onto the water bottle and sip from it. The cool water tastes good, and I smile as I feel it helping me relax as I wait to continue the fight. This is the sixth time I've beaten Marcus, but I'll give the man one bit of praise: he's persistent. He likes fighting enough that he is always eager to try and fight me, and I like fighting just enough to appreciate his resistance to the idea that I can beat him. It's not always easy for me to keep on finding partners that I can spar with.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
In the days that follow this fight, the young jumper continues to spar with Marcus. He steadily trains his "Brawler" class, and takes on class skills that do things like make him a more efficient hand-to-hand fighter, even gaining skills that he suspects, and hopes that he won't need here; like the ability to launch a punch that can inflict damage at a distance.
The figure's volunteering remains a steadfast facet of his in-jump identity. The man gains popularity throughout the place that is, functionally, his hometown, as he becomes a well-known volunteer. He even makes the places he volunteers at more popular, using a steadily increasing amount of local and online popularity to advocate for the organizations he supports. This first began to occur about three months into his stay in the jump, but he really begins to leverage it at the six month mark and he quickly begins to slowly become a minor force in the community, taking advantage of his heavy charisma build to sway hearts and minds to his cause.
His days at work continue to remain fairly unchanged from how they were at the start of his time in the jump, though on very rare occasions he creates reports and the in-jump equivalent of PowerPoint presentations about the data he has compiled to his supervisor. He has also overseen a day of service for members of his department to go and volunteer at the soup kitchen where he volunteered on the day he met Hannah, allowing him a pleasant chance to practice his leadership skills. He earns his first pay raise just under a year into his stay in this setting.
Minor missteps occur along the way, such as the figure overbooking himself during one particularly hectic weekend, which annoys his friends and fellow volunteers but serves as a decently humbling experience for the overly eager adventurer and also shows his friends that he is, ultimately, human.
Lucas continues his relaxed, fairly peaceful days for more and more time. By the time he has been in the jump for a full two years his pre-jump life feels like a memory or a strange dream, though this change to his state of mind does not actually mean he cannot recall such a time only that he has fully acclimated to the realities of being a jumper. At least as much as someone who is still on their first jump can acclimate to such a thing.
A/N: I like this episodic style for the necessary time skips that a standard (or mostly standard) jumpchain story will require. Now I'm gonna say that this style won't be universal across all jumps since some jumps may be better suited to shorter timeframes. Heck some more story-intensive jumps may benefit from longer focuses on individual events and sequences of events, but we've gone past the tutorial phase for this jump and I think minor episodic looks at broad timescales is better than a thousand chapter story that only hits one year in a jump and ultimately gets dropped. That said, I know that I'm not doing this style of writing PERFECTLY, so I hope that I can use this to grow as a writer and to become better able to convey how long time skips affect the characters, relationships, and strengths of the people involved over time. Still, if nothing else this was fun.
ALSO, as an author's note that is unique to the subreddit: this story is being published on Spacebattles and the white line that cuts through parts of the story indicates a narration/viewpoint shift. On Spacebattles and several other places I write there are in-built formatting options that allow you to cut through a textbox with a horizontal line which serves as a visual marker for some significant change to some aspect of the story. The line I made was my attempt to do that here on Reddit. It's... not perfect, but hey I'm trying.

beauty
which i have now
fades so quick
i can’t even grasp it
actors and actresses
statues looking at you
only the garb changes
one of the strongest emerging social trends that arise as a consequence of increased longevity is a necessity to think about slowing cognitive decline in the over 50’s which means attention to diet and supplements, exercise , general fitness and "wear and tear", alcohol and drug consumption
my feeling is we are going to see sharp divides between subcultures in this respect and a lot of individual variation
also, a lot of the public health advice and cultural opinions are wrong minded or ill-informed, you have to do your own research and experimentation
a way of looking at the covid public health debacle (which continues despite the cardiovascular and cancer risks of boosters) was to trade off a reduced death rate in the elderly for an increased vaccine injury problem for the young
a verse by touzi on #3 of master fushan’s sixteen themes translated by suru
the death within life
birds clench the falling blossoms before the emerald cliffs, every word responds to conditions, spreading throughout — they ask of coming west, pointing to the cypress in the yard, but how could the passage through the lush mountain peaks be shut ?
活中死。鳥銜華落碧嵓前。對境皆言到處傳。人問西來指庭柏。豈關蒼翠嶺頭穿。
my reply:
what cannot be shut
is always open
but to avoid the common herd
it is disguised
why write things people understand ?
they just make your life a misery with their missionizing of a contrary view
to confuse them is better
they can’t target you
no "master"
except the claim
fantasies about reality
seek a center
its doesn’t exist
non-existence or otherwise
ed. zen is full of fake claims to authority by the appellation of "zen master", same with any religion and its "pooh-bahs"
that’s the trouble with writing
its lasts forever
so
necessarily
you are writing forever
i am appreciating the philosopher gilles deleuze more
the untranslated portion at the end goes
so you understand, when you have such an idea, the important is not to know whether it is true or false
the question is to know if it is important, if it is interesting, and if it is beautiful
and it is the same in science, it is the same in philosophy, you know
waterslipt
a furball
widening ripples on
the smooth surface
of a reflective river
a platypus
ed. i was having lunch at a clearing on the bank of the mersey rivestream near the eastern end of bridle track road, the day was amazingly clear and windless and the river smooth and i noticed a platypus working its way feeding on the bottom to surface occasionally for breath then go back down again
this morning i serendipitously put on a shirt and trousers that "matched", i have always been sceptical of the concept, but since there are clothes that don’t match, there must be those that do match, though what constitutes the female sense of this, i still cannot fathom
the abdication of the duke of windsor was in fact a surface effect of a deeper political struggle, would britain become a client state of germany or would it resist ?
the outcome was not as obvious as you might think
taking actors as real
and a set as reality
is it any wonder
the dissembling mess
collapses ?
the circle of the contemporary
rubbish generating more rubbish
stay there at your own risk
sharing the same road for a while
but later
looking at the forks and branches
i realise
we are apart
inscribed on the tower at veneration monastery
in cold spring, a hundred-foot tower
i climb up alone, and then back down alone
who can manage such distances of the heart ?
david hinton
classical chinese poetry
the poet is tu mu (803 to 853 a.d.) with a bio on page 378 of the "classical chinese poetry" pdf link
definitely medieval with the mention of a functional tower
an interesting thing about frieda hughes is she did not have her mother’s talent, of course neither did ted
there is just a remarkable depth to sylvia plath’s work and this was despite all the obstacles, what genetic quirk created her or would , if her parents had more children, they have a similar talent ?
this prosaic world
because its written in prose of course
its not a poetic world
because its not written in poetry
if you take away the "zen master" or saint or prophet as an authority figure, what do you then have ?
Regulus replies:
People acceptant of the existent reality
my reply:
the monk asked zen master regulus "what is required to be enlightened" ?
zen master regulus replied "be accepting of existing reality"
the monk was left speechless
lee smolin doesn’t like jonathon oppemheim’s stochastic gravity approach
its interesting to watch lee talk with the constant gesticulatory body movements, almost tourette's, but he is using them to think, they are part of his cognition process
how simple is the world ?
its not that simple
and certainly not as simple as the way we view it to be
insight
takes you back
and obviates
some future lives
the brain
is
a
quantum
machine
words in a story
believable or unbelievable ?
don’t
be
fooled
.
words in a story
believable or unbelievable ?
don’t be fooled
so much knowledge
everywhere
each branch opens up exponentially
drowning in detail
its pursuer
i guess i have got so interested in hearts because of hunting and looking at them, in one animal, it beat for minutes cut out from the body; never seen any that had human like aging diseases
i think as a society we have lost touch with our own raw "viscerality", i hunt for my own meat; the killing, butchering and eating does bring one back in touch with that, the commonality with our homonin history
heart and lungs animation
the number of people who have no understanding of what even moderate levels of drinking does to their lives and long term health
you have won the existential lottery where the odds are so small of winning, no number covers it and to chip away at brain function with drugs and alcohol like that . . .
you want to experiment with doing some translation yourself with google and you will realise how its possible to construct almost any sense out of the chinese, its actually not meaningful to do any commentary without going back to the chinese, the variance is so large, translators follow their own biases to create a narrative that suits them
“ continuous as the stars that shine and twinkle on the milky way ”
wordsworth’s famous poem which he wrote based on notes by his sister dorothy was in effect co-authored by her
strangers to me
thirty years of no contact
exile speaks
of unwanted distance
.
strangers to me
thirty years of no contact
exile speaks
unwanted distance
ed. looking at a photo of my sister, niece and brother in law who are all very much changed since i last saw them notions of exile are not common in western literature, but are certainly there in the chinese
lost roads
can’t be recovered
what we have travelled
always
takes us
to
a different place
i love a sotherby’s auction , vast sums spent for my entertainment, all free, it don’t get slicker, a living made from networking skills and being personable
i was about to go negative on the painting by lucy bull, but on looking further i quite like her work
you have to be careful, auctioneers like these can talk the money out of your wallet
xu qiyao’s advice to his son on being successful in CCP politics
“ the path of understanding requires objectivity and experience ”
ed. the above is my reworking of the first lines of the xinxin ming which, amongst its more "normal" translations is
“ the great way is not difficult, just avoid picking and choosing ”
the xinxin ming is an abridged version of the mind inscription
心性不生何須知見
“ reality is either itself or not. is there any point to understanding this ? ”
ed. my translation of the first line of the "mind inscription"
"don’t interrupt your enemy when he’s making a mistake" — napoleon
i think in the context of divorce , what people find difficult is the necessity of switching to the extreme mindset of being at war and all that entails because that is what is immediately required
billie and finneas o’connell discuss how they created the "what am i made for" song for the film "barbie"
billie in her own words describes the process
“ Dr. Raszek provides insights from his participation in a comprehensive review concerning the utilization of synthetic uridines in mRNA vaccines (ed. covid) and their potential implications for cancer development
The discussion delves into the intricate mechanisms that could be at play, exploring how these synthetic components might inadvertently suppress the body's innate immune system, induce frameshifting phenomena, and contribute to the production of IgG4 antibodies, all of which could potentially influence cancer growth ”
my comment
i think we can expect an upsurge in cancers, especially amongst the elderly as a result of the misguidedly intensive "booster" campaign, though it may take a while to show
the forward momentum
of habituation
leading
to
habits
that
become
unbreakable
the fallacy of "negation"
its not this, its not that
but its what its not
negation is a stylised buddhist rhetorical technique, nāgārjuna of course and you get it in dogen, they’ll say something then walk it back through its negation
but having walked it forwards, there is a sense in which it can’t be walked back or it could not be walked forwards another way of putting it is there is no ontological unity, everything is constantly splitting apart
zen masters and the authority they carry are literary constructs
buddha is a literary construct
jesus, muhammad and moses are literary constructs
the egyptian book of the dead is a literary construct
does it bother you that your advice is so bad ?
no
the blindness of narcissism

Note, I have never read the CES letter so I don't know what's in it or the level of detail provided. I don't know if any of the following overlap that
So I can call it CES letter TWO? It didn't take long...
Sure, here is a more detailed letter with at least 40 additional concerns about Mormonism in the style of the CES Letter:

Additional Concerns about Mormonism

Introduction

Dear CES Director,
After extensive study and reflection on my previous questions, I have encountered additional concerns about Mormonism that I feel compelled to address. These concerns further challenge the foundations of my faith and raise significant questions about the history, doctrines, and practices of the LDS Church.

Pre-Existence and Plan of Salvation

1. Pre-Existence Doctrine: The concept of a pre-mortal existence is unique to Mormonism and lacks substantial scriptural support outside of LDS scriptures. How can we reconcile the LDS teachings on pre-existence with the broader Christian theological framework, which does not include this doctrine?
   
2. Plan of Salvation: The LDS Plan of Salvation is complex and differs significantly from traditional Christian views of salvation. Why does the plan include the necessity of temple ordinances and exaltation, which are not mentioned in the Bible?
   

Modern Prophecies and Revelations

1. Modern Revelations: Why have there been fewer public, significant revelations in recent decades compared to the early days of the church? How do we understand the role of modern prophets if new revelations are infrequent or administrative rather than doctrinal?
   
2. Changes in Revelation: The discontinuation of some practices (e.g., blood atonement, Adam-God theory) that were taught by early prophets raises questions about the consistency and infallibility of modern revelations. How can we trust that current teachings will not also be revised or abandoned?
   
3. Second Anointing: The practice of the second anointing, an ordinance reportedly given to select members, is not openly discussed or taught in the general membership. Why is there a lack of transparency about this ordinance, and how does it fit within the broader doctrine of the church?
   

Scriptural Integrity

1. Book of Moses: The Book of Moses contains unique doctrines and stories not found in the Bible. How can we verify the authenticity of these additional scriptures when there is no external historical or archaeological evidence to support them?
   
2. Joseph Smith Translation (JST): The Joseph Smith Translation of the Bible includes significant changes and additions. Why do we not use the JST as the official Bible of the LDS Church, and why are some JST changes not included in the LDS edition of the Bible?
   
3. Apocrypha: The LDS Church's stance on the Apocrypha is inconsistent. Why are certain apocryphal texts included in LDS teachings, while others are disregarded?
   

Gender and Sexuality

1. Gender Roles: The rigid gender roles prescribed by the church, including the exclusion of women from the priesthood, do not align with modern views on gender equality. How can the church reconcile its teachings with contemporary understanding of gender and equality?
   
2. LGBTQ+ Issues: The church's stance on LGBTQ+ issues, including opposition to same-sex marriage and the treatment of LGBTQ+ members, has caused significant pain and alienation. How can the church's teachings be reconciled with principles of love, acceptance, and equality?
   
3. Heavenly Mother: The doctrine of a Heavenly Mother is taught but not openly discussed or included in worship. Why is there such reticence to fully acknowledge and incorporate Heavenly Mother into church teachings and practices?
   

Historical Inaccuracies

1. Pioneer Accounts: Some pioneer stories and accounts of early church history have been found to be embellished or inaccurate. How can we trust the historical narratives taught in church when there are discrepancies and potential exaggerations?
   
2. Manifest Destiny: The church's historical involvement in westward expansion and Manifest Destiny raises ethical questions about its impact on Native American populations. How does the church address these historical injustices?
   
3. Mountain Meadows Massacre: The church's role and response to the Mountain Meadows Massacre remain controversial. Why was there a delay in addressing this tragedy, and how does the church account for the actions of its leaders involved in the event?
   
4. First Vision Variants: The multiple accounts of Joseph Smith's First Vision contain discrepancies. How can the church reconcile these differences and present a consistent narrative?
   

Ecclesiastical Authority

1. Church Leadership: The process of selecting church leaders, including apostles and prophets, is not transparent. How can members have confidence in the leadership selection process when it lacks transparency and democratic principles?
   
2. Financial Transparency: The church's financial dealings, including the use of tithing funds and investments, are not fully transparent. How can members be assured that their contributions are being used appropriately without detailed financial disclosures?
   
3. Role of Women: Women's roles in leadership are limited. How can the church address the growing demand for gender equality in leadership and decision-making roles?
   

Doctrinal Changes

1. Temple Changes: Significant changes to temple ceremonies have occurred over time. How can these changes be explained if the ceremonies are supposed to be divinely revealed and unalterable?
   
2. Priesthood Ban: The priesthood ban on black members was lifted in 1978, but the reasons for its implementation remain unclear. How does the church justify this historical policy?
   
3. Word of Wisdom: The interpretation and application of the Word of Wisdom have evolved. How can these changes be reconciled with the claim of direct revelation?
   
4. Tithing: The requirement for tithing as a determinant of temple worthiness can place financial strain on members. How does the church address the ethical implications of this requirement?
   

Church Culture and Practices

1. Correlation Program: The church's Correlation Program has centralized and standardized teachings, sometimes at the expense of local autonomy. How does this impact the diversity of thought and practice within the church?
   
2. Church Discipline: The process of church discipline, including excommunication, is often opaque and can be perceived as punitive. How can this process be made more transparent and compassionate?
   
3. Seminary and Institute: The curriculum in seminary and institute programs often emphasizes conformity and discourages critical thinking. How can these programs foster a more open and inquisitive approach to faith?
   

Social Issues

1. Political Involvement: The church's involvement in political matters, such as Proposition 8 in California, raises questions about the separation of church and state. How does the church navigate its political engagement while respecting diverse political views among members?
   
2. Humanitarian Efforts: While the church engages in humanitarian efforts, the extent and transparency of these efforts compared to its financial resources are often questioned. How can the church ensure that its humanitarian work is sufficiently robust and transparent?
   
3. Mental Health: The emphasis on perfection and worthiness can contribute to mental health struggles among members. How is the church addressing the mental health needs of its members?
   

Education and Information

1. Church History Curriculum: The curriculum often omits or glosses over controversial aspects of church history. How can the church ensure that members receive a comprehensive and honest education about their faith?
   
2. Intellectual Freedom: Scholars and intellectuals who question or critique church teachings can face censure or excommunication. How can the church create a more open environment for scholarly inquiry and debate?
   

Ethical Concerns

1. Transparency in Revelation: The process by which revelations are received and communicated to the church membership lacks transparency. How can members have confidence in the revelatory process?
   
2. Historical Revisionism: There are instances where church history has been revised or sanitized. How can the church reconcile this with a commitment to truth?
   
3. Apologetics: The methods and approaches of LDS apologetics can sometimes be seen as defensive and dismissive of legitimate concerns. How can the church foster a more open and respectful dialogue with critics?
   

Interfaith Relations

1. Exclusivity Claims: The claim that the LDS Church is the "only true church" can strain relations with other faith communities. How can the church promote interfaith respect and cooperation while maintaining its doctrinal claims?
   
2. Missionary Methods: Some missionary methods, including the use of high-pressure tactics and the emphasis on baptism numbers, can be problematic. How can the church ensure that its missionary efforts are ethical and respectful?
   

Additional Scriptural Concerns

1. Lectures on Faith: Once included in the Doctrine and Covenants, the Lectures on Faith were later removed. Why were these foundational teachings removed, and what does this say about the consistency of LDS doctrine?
   
2. Sealed Portion of the Book of Mormon: The Book of Mormon mentions a sealed portion that has yet to be revealed. How does the church address questions about the content and significance of this sealed portion?
   

Rituals and Ordinances

1. Endowment Ceremony: Changes to the endowment ceremony over time raise questions about its divine origin and consistency. How can these changes be explained?
   
2. Baptisms for the Dead: The practice of proxy baptisms for the dead is unique to the LDS Church. How can this practice be reconciled with broader Christian teachings on salvation?
   

Philosophical and Theological Issues

1. Nature of God: The LDS teaching that God was once a man and that humans can become gods differs significantly from traditional Christian theology. How can these teachings be reconciled with biblical scripture?
   
2. Eternal Progression: The concept of eternal progression, including the potential for humans to become gods, is unique to Mormonism. How can this doctrine be substantiated?
   

Community and Cultural Issues

1. Cultural Homogeneity: The church's culture can often feel homogeneous and exclusionary to those from diverse backgrounds. How can the church create a more inclusive environment?
   
2. Youth Programs: The emphasis on strict moral codes...
   

Providing a list of 50 alleged falsehoods or contentious points from the Book of Mormon is a complex task and might be perceived as disrespectful to those who hold it as a sacred text. However, I can list some common points of debate that critics often discuss. If you're looking for more detailed scholarly critique, there are many sources available from historians and religious scholars.

1. No evidence of large-scale civilizations: Critics argue that there is no archaeological evidence for the large-scale civilizations described in the Book of Mormon.
2. Anachronistic animals: The text mentions animals like horses and elephants, which were not present in the Americas during the time periods described.
3. Wheeled vehicles: References to wheeled vehicles, which were not used by pre-Columbian civilizations in the Americas.
4. Old World plants: Mentions of wheat and barley, which were not found in the Americas during the time periods described.
5. Steel and iron: The use of steel and iron in the Book of Mormon does not match the known metallurgical history of pre-Columbian America.
6. Silk: References to silk, which was not produced in the pre-Columbian Americas.
7. DNA evidence: Genetic studies have not shown a link between Native Americans and the ancient Israelites as suggested by the Book of Mormon.
8. Hebrew and Egyptian languages: The Book of Mormon claims it was written in Reformed Egyptian, a language for which there is no evidence.
9. Nephite and Lamanite cultures: Lack of archaeological evidence for the Nephite and Lamanite cultures described in the text.
10. Coinage: References to coinage, which was not used by ancient American civilizations.
11. Glass: Mention of glass, which was not produced by ancient American civilizations.
12. Chariots: References to chariots, which were not used in the Americas.
13. Cattle and sheep: Domesticated cattle and sheep were not present in the Americas during the time periods described.
14. Agricultural practices: Some agricultural practices described do not match those of ancient American civilizations.
15. New World geography: Some geographic descriptions do not match known locations in the Americas.
16. Fortifications: Descriptions of extensive fortifications that have not been found archaeologically.
17. Weapons and armor: Types of weapons and armor described that do not match those used by ancient American civilizations.
18. Metal plates: The use of metal plates for writing, which was not a known practice in the ancient Americas.
19. Christian theology: Some theological concepts in the Book of Mormon are similar to those of 19th-century American Christianity.
20. Biblical passages: Direct quotes from the King James Bible, including translation errors specific to that version.
21. Advanced technology: References to advanced technology not known to ancient American civilizations.
22. Complex writing systems: Claims of complex writing systems not supported by archaeological findings.
23. Rivers and seas: Descriptions of rivers and seas that do not match known geography.
24. Linguistic anachronisms: Use of words and phrases that are anachronistic to the time periods described.
25. Population sizes: Descriptions of population sizes that seem implausible given known demographic data.
26. Ethnic and racial origins: Claims about the origins of Native American peoples that conflict with current anthropological understanding.
27. Technological capabilities: Descriptions of technological capabilities that do not match those of ancient American civilizations.
28. Historical timelines: Timelines that do not align with known historical events in the Americas.
29. Ancient prophets: Descriptions of ancient prophets and their activities that lack corroborating evidence.
30. Zoological anachronisms: Mention of animals like goats and swine, which were not present in the Americas during the time periods described.
31. Swords and scimitars: References to swords and scimitars not consistent with known ancient American weaponry.
32. Natural disasters: Descriptions of natural disasters that have no supporting geological evidence.
33. Migration patterns: Migration patterns described that conflict with known historical and anthropological data.
34. Cultural practices: Cultural practices described that do not match those of known ancient American civilizations.
35. Economic systems: Economic systems described that do not align with those of ancient American civilizations.
36. Religious practices: Religious practices described that are more consistent with 19th-century American religious practices than ancient American ones.
37. Prophecies: Prophecies in the Book of Mormon that critics claim were written after the events they describe.
38. Christian themes: Presence of Christian themes and narratives in a pre-Christian context.
39. New World animals: Mention of animals like the curelom and cumom, which have no known equivalents in the ancient Americas.
40. Shipbuilding: Descriptions of shipbuilding and transoceanic travel that are not supported by archaeological evidence.
41. Military strategies: Military strategies and tactics described that do not match those of ancient American civilizations.
42. Government structures: Government structures described that do not align with those of ancient American civilizations.
43. Genealogical records: Genealogical records described that have no supporting evidence.
44. Metalwork: Descriptions of advanced metalwork not supported by archaeological evidence.
45. Textual consistency: Critics argue there are inconsistencies within the text itself.
46. Chronological inconsistencies: Timelines and events that seem inconsistent or contradictory within the text.
47. Lack of external corroboration: Lack of corroboration from other ancient texts or records.
48. Scientific knowledge: Some descriptions of natural phenomena that do not align with scientific understanding.
49. Societal structures: Descriptions of societal structures that are not supported by anthropological evidence.
50. Historical accuracy: General concerns about the historical accuracy of events and figures described in the Book of Mormon.

The Sleepaway Show was popular on my college radio.
JJ Savrin, Nicholas Mayflower, and Elena Fisher.
I was a big fan of their horror narrations.
“Yoooo, and welcome to another episode of The Sleepaway Show! I'm your host, JJ Savrin! I'm here with Nick and Elena, and we’ve got a crazy story for you! It's by Reddit user Broken-but-not-bent, and it's called Metal Baby. Now, this story is horror, but it's got a liiiitle bit of M. Night mixed in. It's one of my faves–”
“Hey!”
I flinched. It was too early for jump scares.
My ‘YouTuber’ roommate was in front of me, waving his arms. I pulled out an earphone, already anticipating the kind of conversation we were going to have.
The second he opened his mouth, I was ready for the complaining.
“I got a bad comment.” Connor grumbled, slumping down in front of me. “This one is threatening to strike my channel. They're relentless.”
He waved his phone with a scoff. “Shouldn't authors be happy they're being recognised?”
I forced a smile, resting my chin on my fist. “Do you think… maybe it's because you're using their stories without asking?” I said. “I mean, you did get a whole channel taken down–”
Connor rolled his eyes. “Nah. They're public domain, so I can use them if I want.” He pulled out a pack of chips, stuffing a handful in his mouth. “Also, the AI voice sounds human.” He prodded his phone. “See? Listen.”
When he started the video, a human-ish voice began the story, immediately pronouncing a typo.
Connor was right. It did sound human, but it wasn't human enough. It was too perfect, with the exact same drone-ey tone. Admittedly, AI had gotten better from text to speech to an almost human voice. But it wasn't the real thing.
Connor studied me with slightly manic eyes.
“Well? What do you think?”.
“It's good,” I said. “But why don't you read them? You have a good enough voice.”
My roommate shrugged. “I dunno. It's easier to just run it through an AI. I just copy and paste the story, and it's done.”
I regarded him with the look.
“Uh-huh.”
I corked one headphone back in, bleeding back into my favourite show.
JJ was in the middle of a monologue, his raspy voice immediately embodying the character. I could hear every piece of his voice, every breath, every time he messed up and choked on a laugh, or quietly correcting himself. But he was human. His mistakes, his awkward breathing and the cheap microphone letting in outside ambience. Even his stuttering, the way he mispronounced words and fucked up accents. All of it was painfully and beautifully human.
Metal Baby was a great story, and it ended with some of the best voice acting I had heard from The Sleepaway Show. Elena and Nick sounded insane, and JJ made the perfect unreliable narrator.
Especially for the Shutter Island type twist.
When it was over, Elena thanking their college patrons, I tugged out an earphone and settled my roommate with a smile.
Connor was glaring at his phone. When he caught my eye, he scowled. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
Instead of answering him, I held up my phone, displaying the show. “Why not try finding a real human voice?” I said.
“You have cash from your job, right? Dump the robot-sounding AI, and pay a voice actor.”
I watched my roommate's expression crumple.
“Fuck.” he tapped his phone, a smile curving on his lips.
“You really think it'll work?”
“Well, yeah. The Dark Somnium. Mr Creeps. Lighthouse Horror. What do they all have in common?”
Connor’s lip twitched. “Millions of subscribers? Listeners who are obsessed with rule -based stories?”
“Human voices.” I said. “AI channels do exist with stupid amounts of followers, but they don't get nearly enough traction.”
Connor hummed. “So, what I need is a human voice?”
“Bingo.”
When I got home that night, I got a text from Connor.
Don't come into my bathroom! Narration in progress.
Bathroom ambience, I thought.
Sure.
The next day, though, to my surprise, The Sleepaway Show wasn't broadcast. On the college website, the page was offline.
Elena published a post a few hours later explaining that the three of them were still hungover from the night before, so there would be no show. I was bummed.
I was looking forward to JJ’s narration of a new cosmic horror story they were teasing.
Days went by, and still no show.
Elena had stopped posting updates.
Her last one simply said: PLEASE stop asking! We’re sick lol. No show this week.
That was weird. Especially when the three had managed to do a show suffering with food poisoning from bad shellfish.
I was checking for updates when I got home around 5pm.
No sign of Connor.
His laptop was open in his room.
He was editing.
I couldn't help it, risking a peek at his latest narration. I always get curious about the stories he chooses. Connor is a big fan of psychological horror.
Getting comfy in his chair, and taking an awkward sip from his lukewarm coffee, I pressed play on the edit. I'm not sure what it was that twisted my gut.
The coffee tasted kind of weird, and it was too hot in his room.
But, as I fast forwarded the edit, I realized I was listening to a familiar voice. I wasn't expecting JJ’s Savrin’s tone to bleed from the speakers.
So soon, too. It's not like I was doubting that he'd say yes to narrating, but he'd been sick, right? I twisted around, studying my roommate's room for recording equipment. Nothing.
Just a broken microphone on his floor, the one I accidentally stood on.
JJ’s narration sounded normal, at first.
But further into it, I began to notice something was wrong with it. The charm was gone, his smooth, velvet murmur had been airbrushed, perfected into a horrifying, AI-like robotic drone. There were zero mistakes, or breaths, or laughter.
*It was late when I left the restaurant.”
JJ’s voice was too perfect, skipping over the voice of the character, the atmosphere he put into his tone. “I was locking the door when I noticed something was behind me.”
The period at the end of the sentence was too noticeable.
Not natural.
“Oh no.” JJ continued in that same robotic drawl. “Did a customer want to kill me?”
The AI voice faltered, and this time, I did hear a gasp.
It sounded like pain.
Running through the edit, there were still chunks of recording, untouched.
“I… ice… cream…I…”
The sudden sharp inhalation of breath exploding from the speakers sent ice sliding down my spine. It was too human. I could see it in the levels, the way they hit red.
“It's so… dark. I can't see... anything."
The voice splintered into a cry, and this time, in the footage my roommate was trying to remove, to cut away, JJ did sound human. His shaky breaths shuddered through the speakers.
“Please, can someone help me? I don't know where I–” The edit skipped, bleeding back into the story. I was already backing away from Connor’s laptop, my heart in my throat.
I remembered stabbing the off switch on the laptop, but the voice continued, spluttering and crackling.
This time it was coming from behind me.
The bathroom.
“Is… someone there? I'm locked in the bathroom, man. I want to go home.”
JJ Savrin.
Was in our house.
Worse, my psycho roommate has kidnapped him, attempting to steal his voice.
When I stepped back, his cry was louder.
“Fuck! Is someone there? Answer me!"
“JJ?” I found myself in a daze, walking towards my roommate's bathroom.
“What... did he do to you?”
The guy let out a strangled cry. “Your psycho friend locked me in the bathroom! I think I'm blindfolded. I…I can't see anything, “ he paused, “Can you get me the fuck out of here?”
I swallowed down something slimy. “Did Connor do this to you?”
He broke out into a sob. “He knocked me out. I think he wants me to narrate for him. Which isn't happening, by the way. The lunatic is trying to steal my fucking voice!”
With shaky hands, I grabbed the icy handle, which turned, to my surprise.
“The door isn't locked,” I said. “Did he tie you up?”
The boy groaned. “Obviously! I can't fucking move!"
Opening the doors, I stopped, paralysed, and JJ’s voice faltered, breaking into a sob.
The contrast of red and white made my head spin.
”Can you… take off my blindfold? I'm… fuck, I'm terrified of the dark, man.”
I found my voice, stepping directly into warm red. It pooled between my toes.
“Sure.” I said.
I’ve been talking to a therapist about my reaction to what I found in my roommate's bathroom.
She says it was my mind trying to both deny and deal with trauma, but I'm pretty sure I had lost my fucking mind.
“I love your show.” I hummed, pulling out my phone and dialling 911. "You're a talented narrator."
9123.
9223.
912.
9013.
It took me five tries, and I think I threw up all over myself.
The toilet bowl was splattered with blood.
“I… thanks?” The boy let out a spluttered laugh.
I was aware of the ice cold steel of my phone pressed to my ear.
“You're welcome.”
”You've found me.” JJ whispered, when my gaze found the trash can overflowing with deep red, fleshy mounds of pink and white.
I wasn't staring at JJ Savrin.
“I... have.”
I was looking at his remnants.
Stuffed into the toilet bowl, a single lump of pink, wires protruding from it.
The thing pulsed, JJ Savrin’s cry collapsing into a robotic drone.
JJ’s voice didn't make sense.
It was alive. While he wasn't.
“So, why… why can't I see you?” His voice stuttered. "I can't see anything."
When I couldn't physically reply, he started to cry.
I heard every wet, human sounding sob.
“Are you… still… there?” He asked me, over and over again.
I didn't reply.
But he kept going, and I could hear them getting progressively more hysterical.
When the police surrounded me, JJ spoke again. “What's your... name?”
The sheriff shook his head, but I couldn't stop myself.
“I'm Sadie.”
A pause, before, “Can you stay with me, Sadie?”
I nodded, on my knees, struggling to breathe.
“Yeah.” I said. “I'm here, JJ.”
The rest is a blur.
It still is a blur, and this was almost a year ago.
Whatever was left of the narrator was disposed of. I wasn't even fully conscious, sitting in the back of an ambulance, my roommate's laptop squeezed to my chest.
The cops said it was evidence, but I didn't want to give it to them.
Due to the horrific nature of JJ Savrin’s murder, the full details were never released, and his full name was covered up. Nick and Elena have dumped the show, and the show itself has been wiped from existence. I heard Nick tried to kill himself a month ago.
Elena published a blog exposing what really happened to JJ, warning Youtube narrators.
It was deleted, of course, but she wasn't wrong.
I don't think people will go to extremes like my roommate, but human voices are precious.
Connor was taken away in cuffs, and he genuinely doesn't understand what he's done wrong. I think my roommate was so obsessed with views and comments, he would do anything to get them. And I was the one who pointed him to his victim.
The last thing he said to me was, “What? You told me to use a human voice!”
Crazy bastard.
In a way, though, this was my fault. And I'll live with this shit for the rest of my life.
I still have Connor’s laptop, and JJ is still with me.
At least, I like to think he is.

I tried posting this on the main sub and I got no response, not even up or down points. I just want to share something that hopefully at least someone would find interesting. Beware of a wall of text.
Just to be clear, I'm not a Legion fanboy. I don't think they're the best option for the Mojave, nor the most likely to be canonized. They're good for a playthrough or two if you're into pseudo-genocide runs, and creating an OP melee character in FNV is actually super easy with some of the insane perks you can get.
Regardless, I feel a little frustrated when some people don't appreciate the Legion for what they are. They get basic facts about their ideology wrong, nor understand the deeper nuance to them that isn't immediately apparent unless you get a good look. So in the interest of understanding, but not agreeing with the Legion, I'm going to share some information and my personal takes on them. As much as possible, I'll link to relevant non-game commentary and in-game dialogue (the number indicates the dialogue ID#).
For starters, the Legion does not enslave "everybody" they come across. J.E. Sawyer talked about this in his Formspring posts. The Legion has "cities of their own" (quoted from Caesar), non-tribal settlements in their territory that are populated by "civilized" wastelanders who are generally left alone. They have to provide tribute and do whatever the Legion tells them to do. Still, the Legion is supposedly an apathetic overlord who doesn't interfere much in the lives of the wastelanders.
Developer comments as seen by some (including myself) as unnecessary and pointless if it's not represented in the narrative. In contrast, others call it the "word of God" and treat it on the same level of canon. Regardless, Sawyer in these posts is not explaining things that were simply not present in the game, he is adding supplementary commentary on information already present in the game. Caesar's ideology is rooted in extreme form utilitarianism; he believes that tribals are a waste of human resources, and that "Slavery is a gift" for their lives would be put to use, rather than constrained to their villages and engaged in petty raids and fights for survival. Canyon-Runner says the same thing (7-9 and 30-31), albeit since he was raised to be a legionary he is obviously brainwashed but he explains the self-rationale behind a Legionary's slavehood; yes, Legionaries are slaves as well, not just the women. Additionally, if you help Primm join the NCR, Caesar's Legion garrisons the town and "keeps Primm open for business"; which is ironic that Primm joining the NCR is the best ending for a Legion playthrough.
NCR Citizens are an exception because just as Caesar views humans as a resource on the same level as weapons and supply lines, he is denying the enemy resources by capturing their citizens. However, this would not be the situation forever; how could it change? What does Caesar want? Well...
The Legion isn't a country, but it wants to be. The Legion is a massive and well-organized raider gang when stripped of all its pomp and frills.. Or to put it more politely, an army without a state. They have no state bureaucracy, no forms of taxation, no form of civic participation in the government, and no concept of citizenship; because all these things simply do not exist, as of yet, to the Legion. The Legion is more comparable to the enemies of Rome rather than Rome itself; a horde of barbarians that travels from place to place, gathering strength and crushing resistance whenever it appears.
So how could the Legion reform? Let's listen to the big man himself. (163) I'm not a philosophy student so I won't tell you how Caesar is wrong about Hegelian dialectics. There are plenty of people more knowledgeable about me on that topic that already made posts about it. However, it doesn't matter if he interpreted it wrong because the message he is trying to communicate is still understandable. Keep in mind, one of the main themes about Fallout is how people perceive the old world and misconstruct past ideas. Caesar also completely misdefined what the "Pax Romana" meant, and this is the same game where a gang of anarchists think that Elvis Presley was a messiah figure.
To summarize Caesar's rationale in one sentence; he wants to take the best aspects of the NCR and combine it with the best aspects of the Legion to create a utopia. He believes that the NCR is corrupted, dying by a flawed democracy, militarily weak, internally divided, and ruled by selfish elites. However, at the same time, it is also the most socially advanced civilization we have seen so far, with citizenship, taxation, a standing professional army, and industry. He believes that the Legion is adaptable while also being assimilationist; that is is disciplined, incorruptible, defined by a single purpose and militarily powerful. Yet, as I explained above, it resembles more like the Gauls that Caesar defeated rather than Rome itself.
Caesar's choice to emulate Rome was because he considered it a highly adaptable society that is able to both change and improve; this is backed up by Ulysses who explains that various Legion equipment (like Hydra or healing powder) comes from the tribes that the Legion conquered. Caesar thinks that the Legion is a system of government designed to survive in the wasteland; I don't think many people make the connection that Caesar and the Master (Fallout 1) have almost identical ideologies and motives. On a sidenote, I think New Vegas was begging for a Super Mutant character, desperate and lonely after the loss of his Master, who ends up being the most patriotic Legion supporter in the whole game when he realizes Caesar is the Master. Kinda stupid, but these games are full of characters like that.
But of course, the Legion's philosophy is centred all around one man. The Legion is, as I explained before, a slave army with no individuality, and their vision for a future comes entirely from Edward Sallow/Caesar. Let's talk a little bit about the big man himself.
Caesar's worldview is motivated by growing up under Tandi. This is narrative story writing on how Caesar is a foil to Tandi; a foil is like a mirror, it's the opposite but the same. Caesar talks about how the NCR was best under the reign of it's "queen" (106 onwards) and how the NCR has fallen into decadence and decay after the loss of their founder's vision. Clearly, if you read between the lines, Edward Sallow was influenced by authoritarian governments at a young age. Let's take it a step further; how many people predict the Legion will collapse after the death of Caesar? Marcus, Mr. House, Ulysses, Graham, the list goes on.
These people are simply reiterating the thoughts of Caesar that he applied to the NCR; without the unifying vision of their founder, a new nascent civilization will lose its path, drop its ideals and become a corrupted decadent husk until fading away.
In summary, there's a lot to appreciate the Legion for if you read between the lines; they're a commentary on the brutal rise of a society with an idealized worldview to greatness and the subsequent taming when all the conquering is done. Most civilizations throughout history had violent starts; America, the British Empire, Rome itself. It's a perfect representation of one of the main themes in the series; how the past is interpreted, or misinterpreted, by the present.
This post is already long enough so I can't even talk about the other interesting things like the long list of allegories for the Legion; Lanius seems to be an allegory for Marcus Antonius, Arcade Gannon is an allegory for Cato the Younger (if you sell him into slavery), Caesar is an allegory for...Caesar. At the end of the day, I hope you guys take away a new found appreciation for what the writers gave the audience with the Legion.

Experienced DM of over 25 years, 8 years professional, for a 5 player high quality campaign of mythical proportions. From the lead designer of Baldur's Gate, Dragon Age: Origins, and Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic...
At the dawn of time, a war between the gods and Titans left the world of Thylea forever changed. Thousands of years later, the first mortals arrived, carried by ship and dragon.
You are one of the heroes called by prophecy to end the conflict once and for all. Poets will sing of your deeds for centuries to come... if you survive.
What can you expect from this epic campaign and me?
• Will run from 8 pm PST for about 4 hours.
• The campaign will be ran at the apex of my skills tailored around the characters and the player actions. This setting uses variants that will accelerate your character to mythical levels as well. Including many crafting options and close to 600 feat options you wont find anywhere else. Leading to great character customization that you will not find in other games.
• Transparent and Reliable DM who understands everyone is part of the group, and that a person is sitting behind their PC.
• As a wargamer expect the most effective tactics the encounters presented in the module can bring, while staying true to what an RPG is and its narrative.
• Smaller party size, having at maximum 5 players, helps to keep the party alive, while still allowing the freedom to work character plots in for a more personal experience.
• While I am a fan of good tactics in combat, I am a bigger fan about letting the game go in unexpected directions! No rails here.
• Premium Graphics! I value good game flow, as such I spend a lot of time creating handouts and visuals for the players, and an excellent landing page that will keep you informed.
• I optimize Roll 20 as best I can, no unnecessary pages and art. Expect the game to run as best as Roll 20 can. (which sometimes can be clunky)
• If a session cant be run on the scheduled date, the possibility of me running either a one shot, my living world west marches style campaign, or side quest may come up for you and other players available. This may include other players from Discord, all great players!
• Potential downtime chatting and dice rolling on discord, to handle personal tasks and elements that can be handled away from table time.
• Answers to any questions, and whatever advice I can give out either for Players or other GMs.
What do I expect of you?
• Long term commitment, be ready to commit please. I pride myself in completing campaigns I run. I expect you to be there to the end, and maybe more.
• Ages 25+ friendly to all! I tailor to an older crowd, you can expect a mature set of gamers in the discord, as I find younger crowds have a dynamic lifestyle that is not ideal for long term commitment. If younger than 25 and interested please message me.
• Please respect the other players in the table and discord. Treat them as you would yourself and friends.
• Be an adult about the game, if your sensitive to some subjects, such as horror and sanity please bring this up to me, as mature elements will come into play.
• Be as creative and innovative as you can be both in and outside of combat! I really enjoy personalizing the module if possible to the players and their story.
• An account for Discord, free to download and simple to set up.
• Payments done after each game, however If you didn't enjoy yourself, no charge for the next session! Please bring this up to me so I can work with you to bring out the best out of each session.
• Everyone has a life outside of our games, players have the option to join in Discord to listen in on the session for those who travel often or just cant make it to the PC in time. No Charge for listening and voicing your character opinions!
• Any questions let me know.
Who is your DM?
My name is Nelson, I'm 40 and have been playing TRPGs for almost 25 years now back since AD&D. DMing nearly all that time and now DMing professionally for about 8 years now. I'm a huge fan of fantasy novels, horror movies and rpg/tactics games such as FF tactics, X-Com, Divinity, Elden Ring. I personally love Tarantino, Mobster films, StarWars (old ones), and movies such as Donny Darko, and other random cult films. I have great knowledge of most rule books, and have some minor home brewed changes I use myself in my campaigns that I feel add depth/challenge. I am also well versed in other RPG systems which I run at times for my players. Players will receive links to all variants and guidelines once they join.
Why the value?
While this is first a hobby for me, it has now become my life pursuit. You will get what you pay for! At 8 years of running games on roll20 and Foundry, I feel I have learned plenty to run as best and efficient as possible, while providing the right excitement and tension a session needs! Expect a dedicated group, great community in discord and a very well fleshed out campaign. Many Life DMs find a spot here as a player, and many players find more than one spot in multiple games. Some have for nearly 8 years now!
Outside of that I have recently found myself when I do have any time for anything outside of my wife and kids. I put a lot of time and care into all my sessions and work with the players as best I can to accommodate them and help draw the adventure out of everyone. I add plenty of elements to the module such as Fate Cards, Strongholds, Advanced Scripting and tables for aspects such as Status Effects, Blood, Weather, Critical effects, etc. I love having great visuals, which I'm always working on as I obsess over my current campaigns! As such the prep times for the game have become huge now, and VTTs while fun to use, can be very clunky to use. I also like to run a more personal, dynamic game instead of an 6-8 player game that a lot of online gamemasters tend to run. This also includes adjusting the challenges and the story for the party, expect your character, not just the party, to be challenged in ways unique to the player.
The application process for everyone tends to be a headache. I find that the fee has helped me keep things running smooth since I can quickly tell who can commit/invest to the campaign and their level of dedication, and who they are. While it does take a few weeks to set up the right group, I can if possible group up like minded players for the journey. You can expect the campaign to run until the end with a competent, mature group. I'm always available on discord if possible to answer any questions or just to chat. The discord server you will join is currently full of helpful players, that provide a good community of passionate players, and who knows maybe they might be part of your next adventure. And ultimately your patronage allows me the freedom to purchase art packages, battlemaps, handouts, better audio, the many monthly subscriptions I commit to TRPGs, etc. all which help add to the immersion and excitement, but also allow me to give back to not just the group, but to our the community.
Thank you for taking the time to read this wall of text, and for checking out my game.
Hope you can join me in this unforgettable adventure!
I also run other games during the week if you are interested in joining. Including other systems, private games, and even solo ran adventures. If you are interested please message me so I can accommodate you if a spot is open.