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2024.04.28 22:42 Bakery-Casino-3079 AITA for trying to destroy a family quilt even though it’s technically mine?
Throwaway since I (21M) don’t want my family or anyone I know stumbling across this.
I honestly don’t know if I’m the asshole here.
So to start, when I was ten years old I was babysitting my little sister, we’ll call her Sarah, while my mom was out running errands. I was an idiot kid and got distracted by cartoons on the downstairs TV, leaving Sarah upstairs. I still feel so bad about it even though I know I was only ten at the time.
I’ll spare you the details, but Sarah ended up getting herself tangled up in a quilt and couldn’t free herself. She suffocated and her death has been on my mind every day since. My parents and I have both gone through a ton of therapy since it happened. They say they don’t blame me, and my therapist says I shouldn’t still be blaming myself, but I still think I do. I don’t know, in a way being hard on myself makes me feel better about it.
We still have the quilt. I didn’t know it at the time but it’s apparently been in our family for generations. My mom said she remembers her mother tucking her in at night with it. Both my parents couldn’t bear to bury my sister with it and I’m glad they didn’t. I hate the thought of Sarah being buried with the thing that smothered her.
Actually, the quilt is technically mine. I was the first kid my parents had so I guess I was the one to inherit it. It’s got a unique pattern of vines and pheasants sewn into it that used to make me really nostalgic, but I can’t bring myself to look at it anymore. It sits folded away in the hall closet of my parents house and I only ever glance at it from the corner of my eye if I ever have to grab a towel or a coat or something.
So here’s where I might be the asshole: for my 21st birthday I decided I was going to burn the quilt. My parents strongly objected but not only is the quilt technically mine, I feel it will give me a lot of closure. I thought that maybe if it were gone I could live my life without having to be so hard on myself all the time. It would be this little symbolic ritual just for me to sort of start my life over from the guilt that’s been weighing on me for over a decade.
A few days ago I paid my parents a visit and snuck the quilt out of the house while they were on the back porch. It felt so weird to actually touch it. I had forgotten how it smelled. I was instantly transported back to the bedroom Sarah and I used to share. I remember her crib disassembled and the pieces propped up against the wall by the door. I realized Mom might’ve been out shopping for a big girl bed for her the night she died.
The thought made me tear up, but luckily my parents weren’t around to see. I quickly stuffed the quilt into my backpack and left for my place.
I’m in college right now and share a house with three other guys. Two of them were visiting their families for Christmas but one, we’ll call him “Ben” stayed in town for the holidays since his family lives fairly close by like mine does. One thing you need to know about Ben is that he’s a prankster. All of us sort of are, but Ben is particularly good at it.
Anyway, that night I left my backpack on the floor by the door. I planned to burn the quilt in the early morning and set my alarm for 4am. I figured there was a lesser chance of anyone complaining about the smoke that way. Plus, I wanted to be alone when it went up in flames.
My alarm went off at 4am the next morning. I fumbled around my room a bit for my lighter that’s usually reserved for the house bong. Once I found it on the floor under my desk I swung open my bedroom door and nearly shat myself.
Ben was sitting on the couch facing me with the quilt draped over himself like a cartoon ghost. His lanky form wrapped in musty vines and birds. He nearly gave me a heart attack.
I was surprised that he didn’t start laughing when I yelled “FUCK” and jumped back, but if he wasn’t laughing yet that probably meant that there was more to the prank and we hadn’t reached the final punchline yet.
I was done, though. I wasn’t in the mood for pranks. I called him a piece of shit for going through my backpack. Maybe I’m an asshole for that too.
But Ben didn’t respond. He sat still for a few seconds while I glared at him. I thought maybe I had really hurt his feeling and started to apologize when he slowly lifted himself from the couch and starting walking toward the front door.
I turned the corner to follow him and saw that he had walked out the door and was moving swiftly over the front lawn toward the street. I sprinted out after him and yelled at him to give the quilt back.
Ben started gaining speed so that I could barely keep up. We looked like idiots playing an angry game of tag in the dark street at four in the morning but that was probably all part of Ben’s plan. He probably had someone close by filming the whole thing for TikTok.
I had no idea how he was outrunning me. He was wearing the oldest looking pair of leather shoes I’d ever seen, and I had no idea how he could even see where he was going.
Maybe I’m just monstrously out of shape. In any case, he was absolutely booking it down the dark freezing street, popping in and out of the beams of the street lamps.
I couldn’t keep running after him. The cold night air was tearing my lungs to shreds. I yelled one last “Fuck OFF, dude!” into the night before doubling over to catch my breath. After a minute or two I turned around and pathetically started walking back to the house. I could hear the wet slaps of those gross looking shoes on the pavement getting farther away.
I assumed Ben would turn up at the house shortly after I got back but he didn’t. I waited around for a few hours, checking social media periodically, but he hadn’t messaged me or posted any videos of me flailing after him in the dark.
Just then, I noticed that it was STILL dark. We always kept the curtains drawn but usually you could tell when the sun was up. I got up from the couch and pulled the curtains aside and saw nothing but black. I couldn’t even see the light from the street lamps. I closed the curtains again and flicked the light switch on to make sure the power hadn’t gone out. The harsh light from the one ceiling light that we never used flooded the room. For some reason it was only the street lamps that weren’t getting power.
Curious, I opened the front door and stepped into the freezing night air and immediately walked right into something soft.
I hastily turned on the porch light. I had walked right into the quilt. It had been draped over the low covering of the porch for me to stumble into. I gave it a tug to try and pul it down. I figured Ben had nailed it to the roof and it would probably tear, but that didn’t matter since it was going to burn anyway. After dealing with Ben’s dumb pranks all night I would enjoy seeing it go up in flames just a bit more.
It wouldn’t budge. I pulled as hard as I could and put all my weight into trying to tear it down but whatever was holding it to the roof wasn’t giving way. As I was clinging to it I realized that it seemed a lot bigger than I’d remembered. It actually draped around the whole front porch.
I was going to have to go under it. I lifted the heavy fabric above my head and walked carefully down the front steps.
And, I don’t understand this part at all, but there was just more quilt. I kept walking and the quilt kept going. I made it to the middle of our lawn, almost tripping over a tree root as I got farther away from the light of the front porch, still holding my hands above me supporting the wet musty fabric. It was as if someone had made a thousand ancient family quilts and sewed them all together, only to then drape the across the entire front yard of the house.
I turned back to the house. I could see the porch light still on but it was a faint glow bouncing off a sea of concave fabric. It was getting hard to breathe, probably because I was breathing a lot faster now. I made my way back to the porch light, walking my hands along the fabric above me as I went and trying not to break into a run. Running felt like the first step to panicking.
I got to the house and slammed the front door shut behind me. I drew back the curtains again, this time flicking on the living room light before I did. Pressed against the window was a maze of ruddy vines and ornate birds stitched into a sea of musty yellowing fabric. The birds stared at me with black beady eyes through my own terrified reflection.
I tore through the house. I ripped back the curtains on every window. Same thing. No view of the street outside or the trees in the backyard, just flat lifeless birds trapped in a tangle of vines.
I have a vague memory of being a kid and watching a movie where a house had to be fumigated for pests. The house had been draped in striped fabric like a circus tent. I had never seen that happen in real life and would occasionally wonder if it was a real thing. Anyway, I figured that was what my house must look like from the outside.
I was freaking out at this point. I checked all the windows and doors several more times and left all the curtains open so that I could prove to myself that this was really happening. That somehow the quilt that had strangled Sarah when we were kids had spread out like a giant amoeba and enveloped the shitty house with me inside.
The quilt’s edge had to be somewhere. The house had a large front yard but beyond it was a road.
I grabbed a bread knife from the kitchen and headed back out the front door. Leaving the porch light on I tucked the knife into my belt and started out again, walking my hands along the wet fabric as I went. I passed the tree root I had tripped over on my first excursion. I could only faintly see it as the porch light was growing farther away behind me. Soon it was swallowed up by quilt as I got closer to where I knew the road would be.
The quilt got heavier as I walked. It was soaked and I wondered if maybe it had been snowing. Where was the road? I really felt like I should’ve reached the curb by now.
I dug into my pocket for my phone. Still no messages from either my parents or the other residents of the house. I turned on the phone’s flashlight and then tucked it under my chin so that I could at least see where I was going. The quilt’s vines crisscrossed above me like a net.
The quilt soon got so heavy that I had to crawl on my hands and knees. I decided that I would go just a bit farther before I decided to say “fuck it” and just cut myself out. I held the phone with my left hand and inched myself along the ground with my right as the wet fabric slid across my back.
And then I felt it. Something was tugging at the quilt from all sides. It felt like the quilt was a fitted sheet that someone was trying to stretch over a mattress and I was trapped underneath. It was pressing me into the icy ground. Somehow I managed to flip myself over. I fumbled at my belt for the knife.
When I was a kid, before Sarah died, a commercial for Space Bags would play in between the cartoons we would watch on Saturday mornings. After we lost Sarah I became terrified of that commercial. My imagination turned against me and I would wonder what it would happen if you put a human in one before sucking out the air. The idea would sometimes strike me unexpectedly, and I would see visions of skin and muscle collapsing as quickly and effortlessly as a stack of soft bath towels. My dad would come into my room and comfort me, thinking I had a nightmare. I could never find the words to tell him that I hadn’t been asleep, just lying awake. Thinking.
Those visions snapped back into my mind as I felt the quilt begin to press me into the icy ground. I wrenched the knife free from my belt and flipped over onto my back.
I stabbed wildly above my face. It wasn’t easy. The quilt was so much thicker than I remembered and was rapidly closing in, but by stabbing and slashing downward I finally felt the knife break through to the other side and quickly shoved my head through the small opening.
I took a few huge gasps of fresh air before setting to work freeing the rest of my body. I stuck the blade toward the sky and sawed downward toward my feet until I had made a hole big enough that I could just squirm out of.
I sat panting with my knees to my chest. When I finally stood up I was shaky and tripped over something big and bulky. My hands flew out in front of me and found a smooth hard surface.
It felt like I had stumbled into a wall. Feeling around further, I found a light switch and turned it on.
I was back in the house. Back in the living room. In the middle of the room, in front of the couch was a huge gash in the carpet.
I had come up through the floor.
And I did so again. And again. Violent gashes in the floor now snake across the living room carpet. A few run across the ugly linoleum of the kitchen. A few even run up the walls. It’s getting so hard to breathe, and I don’t remember what air tastes like without the spice of mold and rot. The house lost power a few hours ago, and I can’t stop thinking about Sarah, and nets and trapped birds and Space Bags and how this knife is getting so dull and how I’m getting so cold.
So Reddit, I need your help.
AITA?
submitted by Bakery-Casino-3079 to nosleep [link] [comments]
I honestly don’t know if I’m the asshole here.
So to start, when I was ten years old I was babysitting my little sister, we’ll call her Sarah, while my mom was out running errands. I was an idiot kid and got distracted by cartoons on the downstairs TV, leaving Sarah upstairs. I still feel so bad about it even though I know I was only ten at the time.
I’ll spare you the details, but Sarah ended up getting herself tangled up in a quilt and couldn’t free herself. She suffocated and her death has been on my mind every day since. My parents and I have both gone through a ton of therapy since it happened. They say they don’t blame me, and my therapist says I shouldn’t still be blaming myself, but I still think I do. I don’t know, in a way being hard on myself makes me feel better about it.
We still have the quilt. I didn’t know it at the time but it’s apparently been in our family for generations. My mom said she remembers her mother tucking her in at night with it. Both my parents couldn’t bear to bury my sister with it and I’m glad they didn’t. I hate the thought of Sarah being buried with the thing that smothered her.
Actually, the quilt is technically mine. I was the first kid my parents had so I guess I was the one to inherit it. It’s got a unique pattern of vines and pheasants sewn into it that used to make me really nostalgic, but I can’t bring myself to look at it anymore. It sits folded away in the hall closet of my parents house and I only ever glance at it from the corner of my eye if I ever have to grab a towel or a coat or something.
So here’s where I might be the asshole: for my 21st birthday I decided I was going to burn the quilt. My parents strongly objected but not only is the quilt technically mine, I feel it will give me a lot of closure. I thought that maybe if it were gone I could live my life without having to be so hard on myself all the time. It would be this little symbolic ritual just for me to sort of start my life over from the guilt that’s been weighing on me for over a decade.
A few days ago I paid my parents a visit and snuck the quilt out of the house while they were on the back porch. It felt so weird to actually touch it. I had forgotten how it smelled. I was instantly transported back to the bedroom Sarah and I used to share. I remember her crib disassembled and the pieces propped up against the wall by the door. I realized Mom might’ve been out shopping for a big girl bed for her the night she died.
The thought made me tear up, but luckily my parents weren’t around to see. I quickly stuffed the quilt into my backpack and left for my place.
I’m in college right now and share a house with three other guys. Two of them were visiting their families for Christmas but one, we’ll call him “Ben” stayed in town for the holidays since his family lives fairly close by like mine does. One thing you need to know about Ben is that he’s a prankster. All of us sort of are, but Ben is particularly good at it.
Anyway, that night I left my backpack on the floor by the door. I planned to burn the quilt in the early morning and set my alarm for 4am. I figured there was a lesser chance of anyone complaining about the smoke that way. Plus, I wanted to be alone when it went up in flames.
My alarm went off at 4am the next morning. I fumbled around my room a bit for my lighter that’s usually reserved for the house bong. Once I found it on the floor under my desk I swung open my bedroom door and nearly shat myself.
Ben was sitting on the couch facing me with the quilt draped over himself like a cartoon ghost. His lanky form wrapped in musty vines and birds. He nearly gave me a heart attack.
I was surprised that he didn’t start laughing when I yelled “FUCK” and jumped back, but if he wasn’t laughing yet that probably meant that there was more to the prank and we hadn’t reached the final punchline yet.
I was done, though. I wasn’t in the mood for pranks. I called him a piece of shit for going through my backpack. Maybe I’m an asshole for that too.
But Ben didn’t respond. He sat still for a few seconds while I glared at him. I thought maybe I had really hurt his feeling and started to apologize when he slowly lifted himself from the couch and starting walking toward the front door.
I turned the corner to follow him and saw that he had walked out the door and was moving swiftly over the front lawn toward the street. I sprinted out after him and yelled at him to give the quilt back.
Ben started gaining speed so that I could barely keep up. We looked like idiots playing an angry game of tag in the dark street at four in the morning but that was probably all part of Ben’s plan. He probably had someone close by filming the whole thing for TikTok.
I had no idea how he was outrunning me. He was wearing the oldest looking pair of leather shoes I’d ever seen, and I had no idea how he could even see where he was going.
Maybe I’m just monstrously out of shape. In any case, he was absolutely booking it down the dark freezing street, popping in and out of the beams of the street lamps.
I couldn’t keep running after him. The cold night air was tearing my lungs to shreds. I yelled one last “Fuck OFF, dude!” into the night before doubling over to catch my breath. After a minute or two I turned around and pathetically started walking back to the house. I could hear the wet slaps of those gross looking shoes on the pavement getting farther away.
I assumed Ben would turn up at the house shortly after I got back but he didn’t. I waited around for a few hours, checking social media periodically, but he hadn’t messaged me or posted any videos of me flailing after him in the dark.
Just then, I noticed that it was STILL dark. We always kept the curtains drawn but usually you could tell when the sun was up. I got up from the couch and pulled the curtains aside and saw nothing but black. I couldn’t even see the light from the street lamps. I closed the curtains again and flicked the light switch on to make sure the power hadn’t gone out. The harsh light from the one ceiling light that we never used flooded the room. For some reason it was only the street lamps that weren’t getting power.
Curious, I opened the front door and stepped into the freezing night air and immediately walked right into something soft.
I hastily turned on the porch light. I had walked right into the quilt. It had been draped over the low covering of the porch for me to stumble into. I gave it a tug to try and pul it down. I figured Ben had nailed it to the roof and it would probably tear, but that didn’t matter since it was going to burn anyway. After dealing with Ben’s dumb pranks all night I would enjoy seeing it go up in flames just a bit more.
It wouldn’t budge. I pulled as hard as I could and put all my weight into trying to tear it down but whatever was holding it to the roof wasn’t giving way. As I was clinging to it I realized that it seemed a lot bigger than I’d remembered. It actually draped around the whole front porch.
I was going to have to go under it. I lifted the heavy fabric above my head and walked carefully down the front steps.
And, I don’t understand this part at all, but there was just more quilt. I kept walking and the quilt kept going. I made it to the middle of our lawn, almost tripping over a tree root as I got farther away from the light of the front porch, still holding my hands above me supporting the wet musty fabric. It was as if someone had made a thousand ancient family quilts and sewed them all together, only to then drape the across the entire front yard of the house.
I turned back to the house. I could see the porch light still on but it was a faint glow bouncing off a sea of concave fabric. It was getting hard to breathe, probably because I was breathing a lot faster now. I made my way back to the porch light, walking my hands along the fabric above me as I went and trying not to break into a run. Running felt like the first step to panicking.
I got to the house and slammed the front door shut behind me. I drew back the curtains again, this time flicking on the living room light before I did. Pressed against the window was a maze of ruddy vines and ornate birds stitched into a sea of musty yellowing fabric. The birds stared at me with black beady eyes through my own terrified reflection.
I tore through the house. I ripped back the curtains on every window. Same thing. No view of the street outside or the trees in the backyard, just flat lifeless birds trapped in a tangle of vines.
I have a vague memory of being a kid and watching a movie where a house had to be fumigated for pests. The house had been draped in striped fabric like a circus tent. I had never seen that happen in real life and would occasionally wonder if it was a real thing. Anyway, I figured that was what my house must look like from the outside.
I was freaking out at this point. I checked all the windows and doors several more times and left all the curtains open so that I could prove to myself that this was really happening. That somehow the quilt that had strangled Sarah when we were kids had spread out like a giant amoeba and enveloped the shitty house with me inside.
The quilt’s edge had to be somewhere. The house had a large front yard but beyond it was a road.
I grabbed a bread knife from the kitchen and headed back out the front door. Leaving the porch light on I tucked the knife into my belt and started out again, walking my hands along the wet fabric as I went. I passed the tree root I had tripped over on my first excursion. I could only faintly see it as the porch light was growing farther away behind me. Soon it was swallowed up by quilt as I got closer to where I knew the road would be.
The quilt got heavier as I walked. It was soaked and I wondered if maybe it had been snowing. Where was the road? I really felt like I should’ve reached the curb by now.
I dug into my pocket for my phone. Still no messages from either my parents or the other residents of the house. I turned on the phone’s flashlight and then tucked it under my chin so that I could at least see where I was going. The quilt’s vines crisscrossed above me like a net.
The quilt soon got so heavy that I had to crawl on my hands and knees. I decided that I would go just a bit farther before I decided to say “fuck it” and just cut myself out. I held the phone with my left hand and inched myself along the ground with my right as the wet fabric slid across my back.
And then I felt it. Something was tugging at the quilt from all sides. It felt like the quilt was a fitted sheet that someone was trying to stretch over a mattress and I was trapped underneath. It was pressing me into the icy ground. Somehow I managed to flip myself over. I fumbled at my belt for the knife.
When I was a kid, before Sarah died, a commercial for Space Bags would play in between the cartoons we would watch on Saturday mornings. After we lost Sarah I became terrified of that commercial. My imagination turned against me and I would wonder what it would happen if you put a human in one before sucking out the air. The idea would sometimes strike me unexpectedly, and I would see visions of skin and muscle collapsing as quickly and effortlessly as a stack of soft bath towels. My dad would come into my room and comfort me, thinking I had a nightmare. I could never find the words to tell him that I hadn’t been asleep, just lying awake. Thinking.
Those visions snapped back into my mind as I felt the quilt begin to press me into the icy ground. I wrenched the knife free from my belt and flipped over onto my back.
I stabbed wildly above my face. It wasn’t easy. The quilt was so much thicker than I remembered and was rapidly closing in, but by stabbing and slashing downward I finally felt the knife break through to the other side and quickly shoved my head through the small opening.
I took a few huge gasps of fresh air before setting to work freeing the rest of my body. I stuck the blade toward the sky and sawed downward toward my feet until I had made a hole big enough that I could just squirm out of.
I sat panting with my knees to my chest. When I finally stood up I was shaky and tripped over something big and bulky. My hands flew out in front of me and found a smooth hard surface.
It felt like I had stumbled into a wall. Feeling around further, I found a light switch and turned it on.
I was back in the house. Back in the living room. In the middle of the room, in front of the couch was a huge gash in the carpet.
I had come up through the floor.
And I did so again. And again. Violent gashes in the floor now snake across the living room carpet. A few run across the ugly linoleum of the kitchen. A few even run up the walls. It’s getting so hard to breathe, and I don’t remember what air tastes like without the spice of mold and rot. The house lost power a few hours ago, and I can’t stop thinking about Sarah, and nets and trapped birds and Space Bags and how this knife is getting so dull and how I’m getting so cold.
So Reddit, I need your help.
AITA?
2024.04.28 22:42 Glittering_Ask753 What more can I do??
I’ve lost my parents, 4 dogs, a relationship with my best friend, my health and finances and while some of the grief has let up, i spend most of my time ruminating on what I should have done differently and how it might’ve changed the end result. Because it all happened in a relative short number of time (4 years), I am stuck in this mode of being paralyzed in fear at what I will lose next.
The things I used to be able to do, work hard all day long, work on my weight loss journey, keep my house organized/clean, work on my craft business…. I can’t focus. I start over and over and I just can’t keep on with anything.
My number one focus now is getting approved for life insurance so my partner is taken care of. But it keeps getting denied because I’m being watched for cancer.
That, and learning how to be a better person, learning about God, about heaven.
Im working hard on giving up my high expectations I had of myself to be successful (I still work hard, sometimes 7 days a week), but I’m letting go of making 6 figuires or winning the lottery etc. I’ve stopped buying things and pay off as much debt as I can every month. I’m letting go of needing to make friends. But push myself to go to social events so that it doesn’t turn into something else I can’t do anymore.
Bottom line: all I care about is peace of mind. Paying off debt as fast as possible. Having life insurance on myself. Living with as little as possible. Giving up huge money goals, but still work as hard as I can (even just for the mental distraction), giving up social media, a social life, buying stuff to look good.
When I go to sleep at night I want to feel at peace that I’ve truly done my best with my health, with becoming debt free, moved my wealth on earth to heavenly wealth (where rust can’t corrupt, or thieves steal), done my 3 tasks which is - what am I grateful for today - what good thing have I done for another human being (in secret if possible) - what brave thing have I done to push me out of my comfort zone
My question is this: if you’ve felt like giving up but you know it’s not an option, what do you do to find peace of mind and live a contented life, free from fear and anxiety? What more do you think I could do that would help?
submitted by Glittering_Ask753 to Christianity [link] [comments]
The things I used to be able to do, work hard all day long, work on my weight loss journey, keep my house organized/clean, work on my craft business…. I can’t focus. I start over and over and I just can’t keep on with anything.
My number one focus now is getting approved for life insurance so my partner is taken care of. But it keeps getting denied because I’m being watched for cancer.
That, and learning how to be a better person, learning about God, about heaven.
Im working hard on giving up my high expectations I had of myself to be successful (I still work hard, sometimes 7 days a week), but I’m letting go of making 6 figuires or winning the lottery etc. I’ve stopped buying things and pay off as much debt as I can every month. I’m letting go of needing to make friends. But push myself to go to social events so that it doesn’t turn into something else I can’t do anymore.
Bottom line: all I care about is peace of mind. Paying off debt as fast as possible. Having life insurance on myself. Living with as little as possible. Giving up huge money goals, but still work as hard as I can (even just for the mental distraction), giving up social media, a social life, buying stuff to look good.
When I go to sleep at night I want to feel at peace that I’ve truly done my best with my health, with becoming debt free, moved my wealth on earth to heavenly wealth (where rust can’t corrupt, or thieves steal), done my 3 tasks which is - what am I grateful for today - what good thing have I done for another human being (in secret if possible) - what brave thing have I done to push me out of my comfort zone
My question is this: if you’ve felt like giving up but you know it’s not an option, what do you do to find peace of mind and live a contented life, free from fear and anxiety? What more do you think I could do that would help?
- heart broken but trying to find happiness again
2024.04.28 22:39 youngmankush Resources or services for disabled people to find jobs in the Twin Cities?
I am a 30 year old male and have had chronic spine issues since I was in high school. I basically live with constant neck and low back pain that make it hard for me to function as an adult. I cannot stand for longer than about 10-15 minutes at a time without being in debilitating back pain, and I cannot do computer work for more than 30-35 minutes without being in debilitating neck pain. This unusual circumstance rules out most commonly held jobs and career paths. I am able to drive a vehicle and currently work part time as a courier, but the pay is too low and hours are too inconsistent for me to truly support myself. I occasionally rely on generous family members for help with certain bills and expenses.
I do have a B.S. in Economics & Political Science, but have never done any work in that field outside of an internship (this was right before my spine issues began to get exponentially worse). I am wondering if anyone has any ideas for jobs, social services, resources etc. that could help me find something I could do, at least part time? I am kind of at a loss as to what to do. I have never applied for disability or looked into the process as I have always sort of help out hope that I could resolve my issues, but I am realizing I am going to have to accept the cards I am dealt as I get older.
Any ideas or information are greatly appreciated. Feel free to DM me if you wish.
submitted by youngmankush to TwinCities [link] [comments]
I do have a B.S. in Economics & Political Science, but have never done any work in that field outside of an internship (this was right before my spine issues began to get exponentially worse). I am wondering if anyone has any ideas for jobs, social services, resources etc. that could help me find something I could do, at least part time? I am kind of at a loss as to what to do. I have never applied for disability or looked into the process as I have always sort of help out hope that I could resolve my issues, but I am realizing I am going to have to accept the cards I am dealt as I get older.
Any ideas or information are greatly appreciated. Feel free to DM me if you wish.
2024.04.28 22:34 SessionOverall7560 Apparently i am a thief? (Long)
I (F18) am on my last year of high school, I thought i was good, just two months left (europe) and then i was finally free. Apparently not.
I’m in a male dominated class, we’re just six girls so we stuck together since the first day, i had friends. This year tho started already wonky, we weren’t best friends but we talked at school and knew a fair amount of each others lives. We never really hung out during summer but things stayed the same when we got back at school. This year they didn’t, i found out that the girls actually went out during summer, a lot, and without me. They didn’t outright exclude me when we came back to school, but it was obvious that i just wasn’t really a part of the group anymore. We occasionally talked but that’s it.
Last Tuesday things went downhill tho, we got to school, though the first two periods and then changes classrooms. We went upstairs in the computer lab, left our bags in there and then we all got for recess(?) for 10 minutes, because our school doesn’t want us in there during our free time as to avoid the possibility of damaging the computers.
So we ALL get out, i was one of the last 3 because i couldn’t find a pad in my bag, but i found it in time and then i left with the other two remaining. Like, literally a step behind, I wasn’t alone in that class for even a second. Plus, the janitor locks the lab during our free ten minutes, so I couldn’t possibly get back inside. I stayed with a male friend during that time.
Well, when we got back inside, about twenty minutes into class, the principal came in and called one of the girls (we’ll call her A) outside. 5 minutes later A comes back in infuriated and obviously sad, the teacher asked her if she was ok and A said that a girl found her wallet in the bathroom on the other side of the school and all the physical money was stolen from it. There was around 130€ inside.
That startled the class of course, we got into a discussion while the teacher tried to calm A, and then another girl (H) said that it had to be one of our classmates because A had the wallet the previous hour, and she showed that she had a lot of money in it. That enraged the class, especially a few boys, because they couldn’t believe H could accuse them of such thing after 5 years spent together. We aren’t the most friendly and united class, but we aren’t enemies or thieves either.
Well, they proposed a bag search, we were all for it and nothing was found, the guys said that if it was someone from class of course they wouldn’t keep it on them. A had a suspect that she told us about, a new guy from this year in our class.
I suggested that if it truly was someone from our class, and they wouldn’t keep the money on them, they they could have hidden it in the bathroom or something. They agreed and sent me to check with one of the guys, and he dropped the bomb on me.
Apparently they think i stole the money, because i was among the last 3 to leave the lab and the other 2 are one of the girls (that is like, A’s best friend) and a guy who is that girl’s best friend and kinda part of the girls group. So of course they wouldn’t suspect them even if they are literally seated next to A while i am not so it would be way harder for me to go and look in A’s bag. But anyway.
He tells me to go look, that he will wait there, and that if i “find” the money (as in i stole them, but idk i regretted it now and wanted to make it look as if i found them, his words) the he wouldn’t rat on me. I was shattered. He was basically setting me for failure, i either “found” it or “not”, and they were sure i did it because i suggested to go look in the bathroom where the wallet was found. I think i was hysterical, i started looking in the bathroom and licking bins and idk, i kinda lost myself, and the stormed back to class. While in the hallway, we came across our teachers that suggested to LOOK IN THE BATHROOM WHERE THE WALLET WAS FOUND and i was so mad that i turned to the guy and told him that since the teacher had my same idea, she must be the thief with me and the just went back to class.
The energy had shifted there, while gone they obviously convinced each other that i was the thief, and i had to listen to the girls seated on my right for the rest of the day, while they made comments where they kept addressing the thief as a “she”, then saying that they just got confused, i listened to snarky remarks and them laughing and calling an accomplice anyone i talked with. They pulled their purses away everytime i got up from my seat.
I am devastated, I can’t comprehend how they can treat me like this without even actual proof. This has taken such a tool on me that i was convinced the whole class hated me. I think some boys don’t believe it, or don’t care. Last friday one of them hit me with a ping pong ball during PE and immediately came to apologize and hug me and i had to run to the bathroom because i started bawling. I hear the girls remarks all day and they are affecting me so much that if one of the guys even just tells me a gentle word i am shocked to my core. I don’t know what to do, i am weak, I don’t think i can resist like this for two months. I dont have family support but i do have a history of being bullied, the girls know both these things and the fact that they are doing this still is just… i dont know how to explain it. I dont even have proof to defend myself other than the fact that i was with a person for those whole ten minutes. They just dont care, in their eyes i am guilty and i feel hopeless.
I have a boyfriend, but he doesn’t go to my school. He is really trying to get me to ignore them and shrug it off, but I’m not that kind of persone. I can’t ignore these things. He is the only person i have and i feel really guilty for not finding his support enough. Their voices in class just really drown out his advice.
submitted by SessionOverall7560 to AITAH [link] [comments]
I’m in a male dominated class, we’re just six girls so we stuck together since the first day, i had friends. This year tho started already wonky, we weren’t best friends but we talked at school and knew a fair amount of each others lives. We never really hung out during summer but things stayed the same when we got back at school. This year they didn’t, i found out that the girls actually went out during summer, a lot, and without me. They didn’t outright exclude me when we came back to school, but it was obvious that i just wasn’t really a part of the group anymore. We occasionally talked but that’s it.
Last Tuesday things went downhill tho, we got to school, though the first two periods and then changes classrooms. We went upstairs in the computer lab, left our bags in there and then we all got for recess(?) for 10 minutes, because our school doesn’t want us in there during our free time as to avoid the possibility of damaging the computers.
So we ALL get out, i was one of the last 3 because i couldn’t find a pad in my bag, but i found it in time and then i left with the other two remaining. Like, literally a step behind, I wasn’t alone in that class for even a second. Plus, the janitor locks the lab during our free ten minutes, so I couldn’t possibly get back inside. I stayed with a male friend during that time.
Well, when we got back inside, about twenty minutes into class, the principal came in and called one of the girls (we’ll call her A) outside. 5 minutes later A comes back in infuriated and obviously sad, the teacher asked her if she was ok and A said that a girl found her wallet in the bathroom on the other side of the school and all the physical money was stolen from it. There was around 130€ inside.
That startled the class of course, we got into a discussion while the teacher tried to calm A, and then another girl (H) said that it had to be one of our classmates because A had the wallet the previous hour, and she showed that she had a lot of money in it. That enraged the class, especially a few boys, because they couldn’t believe H could accuse them of such thing after 5 years spent together. We aren’t the most friendly and united class, but we aren’t enemies or thieves either.
Well, they proposed a bag search, we were all for it and nothing was found, the guys said that if it was someone from class of course they wouldn’t keep it on them. A had a suspect that she told us about, a new guy from this year in our class.
I suggested that if it truly was someone from our class, and they wouldn’t keep the money on them, they they could have hidden it in the bathroom or something. They agreed and sent me to check with one of the guys, and he dropped the bomb on me.
Apparently they think i stole the money, because i was among the last 3 to leave the lab and the other 2 are one of the girls (that is like, A’s best friend) and a guy who is that girl’s best friend and kinda part of the girls group. So of course they wouldn’t suspect them even if they are literally seated next to A while i am not so it would be way harder for me to go and look in A’s bag. But anyway.
He tells me to go look, that he will wait there, and that if i “find” the money (as in i stole them, but idk i regretted it now and wanted to make it look as if i found them, his words) the he wouldn’t rat on me. I was shattered. He was basically setting me for failure, i either “found” it or “not”, and they were sure i did it because i suggested to go look in the bathroom where the wallet was found. I think i was hysterical, i started looking in the bathroom and licking bins and idk, i kinda lost myself, and the stormed back to class. While in the hallway, we came across our teachers that suggested to LOOK IN THE BATHROOM WHERE THE WALLET WAS FOUND and i was so mad that i turned to the guy and told him that since the teacher had my same idea, she must be the thief with me and the just went back to class.
The energy had shifted there, while gone they obviously convinced each other that i was the thief, and i had to listen to the girls seated on my right for the rest of the day, while they made comments where they kept addressing the thief as a “she”, then saying that they just got confused, i listened to snarky remarks and them laughing and calling an accomplice anyone i talked with. They pulled their purses away everytime i got up from my seat.
I am devastated, I can’t comprehend how they can treat me like this without even actual proof. This has taken such a tool on me that i was convinced the whole class hated me. I think some boys don’t believe it, or don’t care. Last friday one of them hit me with a ping pong ball during PE and immediately came to apologize and hug me and i had to run to the bathroom because i started bawling. I hear the girls remarks all day and they are affecting me so much that if one of the guys even just tells me a gentle word i am shocked to my core. I don’t know what to do, i am weak, I don’t think i can resist like this for two months. I dont have family support but i do have a history of being bullied, the girls know both these things and the fact that they are doing this still is just… i dont know how to explain it. I dont even have proof to defend myself other than the fact that i was with a person for those whole ten minutes. They just dont care, in their eyes i am guilty and i feel hopeless.
I have a boyfriend, but he doesn’t go to my school. He is really trying to get me to ignore them and shrug it off, but I’m not that kind of persone. I can’t ignore these things. He is the only person i have and i feel really guilty for not finding his support enough. Their voices in class just really drown out his advice.
2024.04.28 22:32 Mysterious_Rain_444 24 [M4F] #Anywhere #UK - Looking for a partner
Hi all! I am currently looking for something longterm. I will accept people from anywhere in the world as long as they can make distance work. I'm not huge or too picky on what I want someone to be like, so i'll talk about myself and see what bites!
About me:
I have a great voice and accent, and so i like using it by voice calling my partner. Ideally you would like to call too!
I am 6'2 tall, athletic build with black hair and dark eyes. I have light brown skin. My hobbies include gaming. I play on pc mainly. My current go-to games are rainbow six siege, warzone, rocket league, lethal company and star wars battlefront 2. Im also into airsoft and practice MMA (brazilian jiu jitsu and muay thai) I would describe myself as easygoing. I am usually very light hearted and i tend to make others laugh. This doesn't mean i cant be serious though, i often can and am. I am also very big on loyalty and communication. I love trying new food and socialising with friends and family.
I am an engineer by profession, having achieved my masters degree a year ago. I love what I do.
If you are someone who is good at communicating often, and wants something real and longterm, feel free to message me to find out more! :) i accept any ages above 18!
submitted by Mysterious_Rain_444 to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]
About me:
I have a great voice and accent, and so i like using it by voice calling my partner. Ideally you would like to call too!
I am 6'2 tall, athletic build with black hair and dark eyes. I have light brown skin. My hobbies include gaming. I play on pc mainly. My current go-to games are rainbow six siege, warzone, rocket league, lethal company and star wars battlefront 2. Im also into airsoft and practice MMA (brazilian jiu jitsu and muay thai) I would describe myself as easygoing. I am usually very light hearted and i tend to make others laugh. This doesn't mean i cant be serious though, i often can and am. I am also very big on loyalty and communication. I love trying new food and socialising with friends and family.
I am an engineer by profession, having achieved my masters degree a year ago. I love what I do.
If you are someone who is good at communicating often, and wants something real and longterm, feel free to message me to find out more! :) i accept any ages above 18!
2024.04.28 22:31 7-7-0-8-7 Can someone let me borrow their Sekiro or Elden ring game.
I know this might sound a bit unusual but as someone whos passionate about gaming i have hit a bit of a snag. While I have a PS4 gifted by a family member (obviously not my parents), I want to dive into Souls/RPG games. However, the gand phad price on these games(i would rather buy myself a new controller cus this one is so busted 😭) are a problem for me. My parents are not in the favour of me buying games. I mostly been able to play games by borrowing them from my uncle cus he use to have a PS too but he sold it last year.
Me not having anything else to play, now I am stuck to free online games like Fortnite, Apex, and Brawlhalla. I understand this might sound fishy and this post might gets deleted but honestly I intend no harm. I am just a fellow gamer like you all who wants to play something new.
If anyone is willing to help me out and believes in the validity of my situation. Please feel free to DM me. I am willing to provide any necessary proof to show that I am no fraud. PLEASE DO NOT FLAME ME IN COMMENT👉🏿👈🏿.
I play on ps4 and i would LOGOUT ASAP after downloading the mentioned games.
LTDR: Need help getting RPG games. since I can't afford them. Used to borrow from uncle's PS4, but he sold it and my parents won't let me buy any. I play on ps4 and I would LOGOUT ASAP after downloading the mentioned game.
submitted by 7-7-0-8-7 to IndianGaming [link] [comments]
Me not having anything else to play, now I am stuck to free online games like Fortnite, Apex, and Brawlhalla. I understand this might sound fishy and this post might gets deleted but honestly I intend no harm. I am just a fellow gamer like you all who wants to play something new.
If anyone is willing to help me out and believes in the validity of my situation. Please feel free to DM me. I am willing to provide any necessary proof to show that I am no fraud. PLEASE DO NOT FLAME ME IN COMMENT👉🏿👈🏿.
I play on ps4 and i would LOGOUT ASAP after downloading the mentioned games.
LTDR: Need help getting RPG games. since I can't afford them. Used to borrow from uncle's PS4, but he sold it and my parents won't let me buy any. I play on ps4 and I would LOGOUT ASAP after downloading the mentioned game.
2024.04.28 22:28 Final_Ad792 [WTS][EU-FR] [H] Focal Stelliance [W] 1800€ PayPal + shipping / Trade
![[WTS][EU-FR] [H] Focal Stelliance [W] 1800€ PayPal + shipping / Trade](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/4citYDUupOXgoeW7lXzx9bHROND13xtWRrT23TA_tVc.jpg "[WTS][EU-FR] [H] Focal Stelliance [W] 1800€ PayPal + shipping / Trade") | Selling my pair of Focal Stelliance. submitted by Final_Ad792 to AVexchange [link] [comments] This specific unit was made by myself and seems to be the first one being sold in Europe. It combines the superior chassis of the Radiance with the Stellia's insane Beryllium drivers to create the ultimate Focal closed-back! I used a brand-new Radiance and the drivers were carefully swapped. Been listening to them for months and they're a blast! Selling them because I would like to try new stuff and mix it up a bit. Asking 1800€ + shipping and 2.5% PayPal fees. Will come delivered with all the Radiance accessories including the original shipping box. Shipping to EU countries only for safety and customs reasons. There's already a dozen Stelliances in the US, it's time to leave at least one for the EU pals! Willing to trade, mostly looking for the following headphones: Focal Utopia / Abyss Diana / ZMF Vérité Closed / Meze Empyrean. Please have at least some positive feedback! Feel free to ask me any additional questions. :) |
2024.04.28 22:28 stayinyourlaneson 20 years next year... stuck between two ideas of how to honour my mother.
See title! I'd love to know what you guys think, it's a beautiful community here.
I like to dabble in free verse poetry, so that's how I chose to honour her for the 15th year mark - with a three-part poetry series.
I want to do something to mark 20 years since my mother passed... but I'm stuck between two ideas.
Grieving hasn't been easy because I was young when she passed so I didn't know her very well. This means every time I hear about how my mother was in her life, I feel a twang of hurt that I didn't get to experience it.
I'm also a fairly religious person and have been struggling with my identity and how it interlinks with my faith for several years. But I'm coming out of that tough spot and learning to put myself first and introduce self-care because I've realised that's what was missing. Since that epiphany moment, I've been compiling a list from June 2023 of all the things I've ever wanted to do, whether minor or major.
One of those things is one of the ideas I have to honour Mum.
The other idea I have is a personal project I've been thinking about since June but haven't done anything about. I've been having thoughts about it but never actively planned. But today it's like something fuelled me to start brainstorming.
To be honest, I could probably even do both of these things..? I'd love to know what you guys think and would be happy to even answer any questions you might have.
Thank you so much in advance, I appreciate you all <3
submitted by stayinyourlaneson to ChildrenofDeadParents [link] [comments]
I like to dabble in free verse poetry, so that's how I chose to honour her for the 15th year mark - with a three-part poetry series.
I want to do something to mark 20 years since my mother passed... but I'm stuck between two ideas.
Grieving hasn't been easy because I was young when she passed so I didn't know her very well. This means every time I hear about how my mother was in her life, I feel a twang of hurt that I didn't get to experience it.
I'm also a fairly religious person and have been struggling with my identity and how it interlinks with my faith for several years. But I'm coming out of that tough spot and learning to put myself first and introduce self-care because I've realised that's what was missing. Since that epiphany moment, I've been compiling a list from June 2023 of all the things I've ever wanted to do, whether minor or major.
One of those things is one of the ideas I have to honour Mum.
- The London Landmarks Half Marathon, 2025.
The other idea I have is a personal project I've been thinking about since June but haven't done anything about. I've been having thoughts about it but never actively planned. But today it's like something fuelled me to start brainstorming.
- "Moments Sculpt Memories"
To be honest, I could probably even do both of these things..? I'd love to know what you guys think and would be happy to even answer any questions you might have.
Thank you so much in advance, I appreciate you all <3
2024.04.28 22:24 putzing_thru_life Lupron and PMDD diagnosis same day - wild journey
I've been trying for two years to get to the bottom of whatever has been wrong with me. Long story short, I was nearing the end of the line so to speak. With adhd/asd, you're always a little "off", but my normal symptoms went from like a 3/10 to a 10/10 in a matter of months following a very stressful year in 2022. I also developed strange physical symptoms, like hands and feet swelling, blood sugar control issues (not diabetic), thin hair that grows at a snails pace, and more.
I thought autoimmune, a pituitary problem, thyroid, cortisol, etc. Nothing was showing up on labs. Came across PMDD, and suddenly, it was like all the pieces fit. Wrote up a doc with all my symptoms, history, past meds and treatments, and sent it away to my gyno. With all the evidence I provided, he agreed without hesitation. Sent off for a prescription for Lupron (currently on day two) and estrogen patches. I'll get in for surgery to get everything taken out in the next 6 months.
I tried three different forms of birth control, probably five different antidepressants, antipsychotics, sleep aids, countless supplements. Not one practitioner believed me when I said there was something else wrong. This is not "just" depression or anxiety. I saw counselors and psychologists. I tried to explain that they're looking at the symptoms individually, but not looking for the root cause. It was a very stark lesson in learning how to advocate for myself. I treated it like I was going to court. I structured my document as:
submitted by putzing_thru_life to PMDD [link] [comments]
I thought autoimmune, a pituitary problem, thyroid, cortisol, etc. Nothing was showing up on labs. Came across PMDD, and suddenly, it was like all the pieces fit. Wrote up a doc with all my symptoms, history, past meds and treatments, and sent it away to my gyno. With all the evidence I provided, he agreed without hesitation. Sent off for a prescription for Lupron (currently on day two) and estrogen patches. I'll get in for surgery to get everything taken out in the next 6 months.
I tried three different forms of birth control, probably five different antidepressants, antipsychotics, sleep aids, countless supplements. Not one practitioner believed me when I said there was something else wrong. This is not "just" depression or anxiety. I saw counselors and psychologists. I tried to explain that they're looking at the symptoms individually, but not looking for the root cause. It was a very stark lesson in learning how to advocate for myself. I treated it like I was going to court. I structured my document as:
- This is what I believe is going on
- This is why I believe it
- This is what I've tried in the past
- This is how it is impacting (ruining) my life
- This is the treatment I want to try (Lupron + hysterectomy)
- Photos of physical symptoms, like inflammation. My knees and legs would get so inflamed in the evenings that they looked sunburnt.
- Supporting testimony from my fiance
- Successful athlete to not being able to work out
- Owning my own business to not being able to work at all. I tried getting a job earlier this year, but was fired because of how one antidepressant made me act/feel.
- Debt-free to I don't know how I'm going to get out of this financial hole I'm in now.
2024.04.28 22:20 re1801 FF minimum age for sale to change to 21!
Hi everyone! If you haven't seen my posts, I'm a journalist at the University of South Carolina and I posted an article here a couple days ago that I wrote about FF. It was a huge endeavor and I interviewed BT three times. I asked him about university partnerships and the product being sold/given out to 18 year olds. I'm happy to share that after my article was published, he thanked me for my input and said BT will be changing the minimum sale age for all of its products (classic, tonic, and capsules) to 21. It will take 30-60 days for all of the packaging to reflect that.
I linked a brief we published today about the change below. I think this is a step in the right direction and will hopefully keep some young people like myself from being able to pick up FF out of curiosity without really knowing what it is. https://carolinanewsandreporter.cic.sc.edu/feel-free-maker-botanic-tonics-to-change-minimum-age-for-sale-from-18-to-21/
submitted by re1801 to Quittingfeelfree [link] [comments]
I linked a brief we published today about the change below. I think this is a step in the right direction and will hopefully keep some young people like myself from being able to pick up FF out of curiosity without really knowing what it is. https://carolinanewsandreporter.cic.sc.edu/feel-free-maker-botanic-tonics-to-change-minimum-age-for-sale-from-18-to-21/
2024.04.28 22:16 Rob_Ford__ Journey from anxiety, ED, PE and now confident and in control
Sharing my jourey with ED/PE in the hope it might serve people on this sub. TL;DR l found real success through addressing the psychological side of PE: learning to control anxiety, learning how to mentally prepare for sex, learning to control my arousal level during sex.
Context:
My early sexual encounters were fine. I had no real problems in the berdroom with my first girlfriend. I was 18 years old and we dated for 7 months until I went off to university. (I did have the following issues: the 1st time where I was nervous and couldn’t stay hard. Then 1 time randomly where I came very quickly - I thought nothing of it and it didn’t happen again..).
I then went off to university where I had high speed internet, plenty of free time and a private bedroom… I could masturbate all day long. I was ivoluntarily celibate until the end of the academic year where I finally got lucky. Unfortunately I was nervous and I couldn’t get it up - and couldn’t again the next night with the same girl. So, not knowing what it meant, not understanding why it had suddenly started happening or how to correct it, I developed severe sexual performance anxiety which ruined my sex life (and overall confidence) for about 7 years.
The prospect of sex became terrifying. Thoughts would fly through my head about how embarrassed I’ll be when I can’t perform. How humiliating it will be. I carried those feelings with me every day. For a few years I’d get so nervous about the prospect of sex that I tended to avoid women all together. The performance anxiety meant that often I just couldn’t get hard, but if I could get it up then I’d usually lose control and climax extremely quicly. Sometimes I’d ejaculate before getting it in, or just after one or two strokes. This delightful, emasculating combination prevented me from enjoying sex for about 7 years.
I didn’t know how to control the anxiety and it impacted all areas of my life: I felt inadequate and ashamed, I was constantly distracted and struggled to focus and apply myself. I basically thought I was broken, and what made it worse - I didn’t know if I would ever be fixed. Was this just going to be my life now? Through university I tried a couple of different therapists, but they didn’t know how to help with this specific issue - and I didn’t find the right answers.
Solution that worked for me:
Happily, in my mid 20’s I learned how my destructive thought patterns were leading to the performance anxiety, and my negative thought patterns were creating the physical symptoms.
I consciously reconditioned my thinking and how I felt around sex, to almost ‘re-train’ my brain for the outcomes I wanted. I set positive intentions that I repeated daily. I practiced visualising having great sex (not imagining it going wrong.. but very well. Feeling calm, being physically in control, myself and my partner enjoying being naked and having fun together.)
I learned that arousal is a feeling and, like any feeling, it starts as a thought. Once I got my anxiety under ctonrol (daily intentions as well as positive mental preparation ahead of having sex, like an athlete would use visualisation before a sporting event) I was able to better and more calmly control my focus during sex: Rather than worrying if I'm about to cum, I could enjoy the experience and keep my attention away from super arousing thoughts like locking into the feelings and sensations in my penis.
I quite quickly went from a 1 second man with no control and feeling helpless to a 10minute+ man. More importantly, ejaculating was not uncontrolled. I can build it up and feel it and decide to cum when I'm ready. It was a life-changing shift, and the cloud I’d spent most of my adult life living under began to disappear. Today I have generally great results although they are sometimes variable and am still learning more about sex in general- sometimes I pop after 10 mins.
When I’m disciplined however and and make sure I mentally prepare properly then I can almost always last 20+mins - whether it’s a new partner (typically a ‘higher pressure’ situation, as I still feel like I need to ‘perform’) or a long-term relationship where I’m relaxed and comfortable and can begin to go deeper with the girl.
It’s a shame this is such a horrendously awkward topic to breech, because it means loads of us suffer in silence. And by suffer I really do mean that - it can be a very confusing and miserable place.
If you’re going through something similar don’t hesitate to let me know, I am happy to chat. I’m mindful everybody is different - happy to help where / if I can.
submitted by Rob_Ford__ to PrematureEjaculation [link] [comments]
Context:
My early sexual encounters were fine. I had no real problems in the berdroom with my first girlfriend. I was 18 years old and we dated for 7 months until I went off to university. (I did have the following issues: the 1st time where I was nervous and couldn’t stay hard. Then 1 time randomly where I came very quickly - I thought nothing of it and it didn’t happen again..).
I then went off to university where I had high speed internet, plenty of free time and a private bedroom… I could masturbate all day long. I was ivoluntarily celibate until the end of the academic year where I finally got lucky. Unfortunately I was nervous and I couldn’t get it up - and couldn’t again the next night with the same girl. So, not knowing what it meant, not understanding why it had suddenly started happening or how to correct it, I developed severe sexual performance anxiety which ruined my sex life (and overall confidence) for about 7 years.
The prospect of sex became terrifying. Thoughts would fly through my head about how embarrassed I’ll be when I can’t perform. How humiliating it will be. I carried those feelings with me every day. For a few years I’d get so nervous about the prospect of sex that I tended to avoid women all together. The performance anxiety meant that often I just couldn’t get hard, but if I could get it up then I’d usually lose control and climax extremely quicly. Sometimes I’d ejaculate before getting it in, or just after one or two strokes. This delightful, emasculating combination prevented me from enjoying sex for about 7 years.
I didn’t know how to control the anxiety and it impacted all areas of my life: I felt inadequate and ashamed, I was constantly distracted and struggled to focus and apply myself. I basically thought I was broken, and what made it worse - I didn’t know if I would ever be fixed. Was this just going to be my life now? Through university I tried a couple of different therapists, but they didn’t know how to help with this specific issue - and I didn’t find the right answers.
Solution that worked for me:
Happily, in my mid 20’s I learned how my destructive thought patterns were leading to the performance anxiety, and my negative thought patterns were creating the physical symptoms.
I consciously reconditioned my thinking and how I felt around sex, to almost ‘re-train’ my brain for the outcomes I wanted. I set positive intentions that I repeated daily. I practiced visualising having great sex (not imagining it going wrong.. but very well. Feeling calm, being physically in control, myself and my partner enjoying being naked and having fun together.)
I learned that arousal is a feeling and, like any feeling, it starts as a thought. Once I got my anxiety under ctonrol (daily intentions as well as positive mental preparation ahead of having sex, like an athlete would use visualisation before a sporting event) I was able to better and more calmly control my focus during sex: Rather than worrying if I'm about to cum, I could enjoy the experience and keep my attention away from super arousing thoughts like locking into the feelings and sensations in my penis.
I quite quickly went from a 1 second man with no control and feeling helpless to a 10minute+ man. More importantly, ejaculating was not uncontrolled. I can build it up and feel it and decide to cum when I'm ready. It was a life-changing shift, and the cloud I’d spent most of my adult life living under began to disappear. Today I have generally great results although they are sometimes variable and am still learning more about sex in general- sometimes I pop after 10 mins.
When I’m disciplined however and and make sure I mentally prepare properly then I can almost always last 20+mins - whether it’s a new partner (typically a ‘higher pressure’ situation, as I still feel like I need to ‘perform’) or a long-term relationship where I’m relaxed and comfortable and can begin to go deeper with the girl.
It’s a shame this is such a horrendously awkward topic to breech, because it means loads of us suffer in silence. And by suffer I really do mean that - it can be a very confusing and miserable place.
If you’re going through something similar don’t hesitate to let me know, I am happy to chat. I’m mindful everybody is different - happy to help where / if I can.
2024.04.28 22:14 Typical_Lettuce1553 19+ Book Club
 | Hey just created a book club myself. I noticed a lot of the book clubs I was in recommended stories that I wasn’t really interested in (high school setting, poor grammar, cliche love interest, bad directing lol). Feel free to join if you’re 19+, love to earn gems, and love a well directed story :) submitted by Typical_Lettuce1553 to Episode [link] [comments] Bio in case you can’t read it: MUST BE 19+ ! Only active readers welcome. Have at least 30 pts per challenge or you will get kicked. We only read well directed stories with great storytelling <3 Being active in the chat is appreciated. 🤍🤍🤍🤍 |
2024.04.28 22:12 drawingpills 25[M4F] #Europe #Turkey #Online / Artsy Geek Gymrat - Looking for my one and only
Hey, I'm looking for someone to spend my time with.
I'm a guy who works out regularly and I highly care about my appearance. I can easily say I'm above average but everyone has their own taste of course. I'm open to selfie trades.
I'm 6.1 - 185cm, white skin, black hair and eyes
I'm a Concept/2D Artist, and I'm also into 3D and sculpting.
I'm loyal, empathetic, and love to share everything with my partner, also expect the same thing.
I love melancholy in general, sad songs, sad environment, tragedy, dark fantasy...
I'm not thinking about having a child right now but in the future I might, hence if you don't want a child that's a dealbreaker for me.
Another dealbreaker is, having a high body count. Personally, I'm close to no experience (maybe none who knows) and I'm proud of myself because of it.
I'm only into serious relationships I don't like to waste my time on people.
My hobbies are: working out & powerlifting, jogging, spending time with loved ones (especially my cat), video games, reading manga, watching series, movies, or anime, skincare, hair care, watching my ceiling while listening to my self suffering Spotify playlists.
I really like getting and giving attention. If we can connect I'd love to share my everything with you. I prioritize my partner and I expect the same thing. If you can't make time for me that's a direct dealbreaker.
I'm also an open book, I'm against having a private life from your partner. Take my phone and inspect it however you want, I hide nothing.
I'm an agnostic.
Well if you're interested, feel free to send me a DM!
submitted by drawingpills to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]
I'm a guy who works out regularly and I highly care about my appearance. I can easily say I'm above average but everyone has their own taste of course. I'm open to selfie trades.
I'm 6.1 - 185cm, white skin, black hair and eyes
I'm a Concept/2D Artist, and I'm also into 3D and sculpting.
I'm loyal, empathetic, and love to share everything with my partner, also expect the same thing.
I love melancholy in general, sad songs, sad environment, tragedy, dark fantasy...
I'm not thinking about having a child right now but in the future I might, hence if you don't want a child that's a dealbreaker for me.
Another dealbreaker is, having a high body count. Personally, I'm close to no experience (maybe none who knows) and I'm proud of myself because of it.
I'm only into serious relationships I don't like to waste my time on people.
My hobbies are: working out & powerlifting, jogging, spending time with loved ones (especially my cat), video games, reading manga, watching series, movies, or anime, skincare, hair care, watching my ceiling while listening to my self suffering Spotify playlists.
I really like getting and giving attention. If we can connect I'd love to share my everything with you. I prioritize my partner and I expect the same thing. If you can't make time for me that's a direct dealbreaker.
I'm also an open book, I'm against having a private life from your partner. Take my phone and inspect it however you want, I hide nothing.
I'm an agnostic.
Well if you're interested, feel free to send me a DM!
2024.04.28 22:11 CaptB97 Path I’m considering
Hey everyone,
So I have lurked on this subreddit for a while now. Mainly researching, looking at first time posts about people asking opinions on aviation as a career and experiences in flight schools etc.
I’m leaning very heavily towards transitioning to becoming a pilot as a professional career goal, and hopefully end up flying for airlines. My free time hobbies revolve around a lot planes with spotting and flight simulation. It is the one thing that I have maintained a passion for since I first experienced flying on a plane over a decade ago. Working on an airport ramp really has also driven home the point that working with planes is something I can do forever.
As of right now based on everything I’ve looked through and read and places I’ve called this is my game plan. And I would like the opinions of all of you to see if there’s anything I missed or anything else I might consider going down this path and how to achieve my goals.
I have a First class medical coming up in the next week. I selected a first class because I want to be sure I can pass the most rigorous medical exam before I really start spending money.
After the exam I’m doing a discovery flight. Get the feel for flying light aircraft and see what it’s like and make sure it’s something I can do. Although my passion is there I just want to make sure I can actually do it. Sim and real life are different.
Next ground school, the flight school I spoke to recommended doing it online by myself before going in to do lessons for PPL. So I’ve figured the cost and timeframe to complete ground school, I’m leaning towards sportys but not sure if there are others which may be better.
After ground school, I’m most likely going to join my local part 61 flight school to get my PPL. I’m planning on paying as I go with money from a second job as this is basically a career transition I’m making and have no money on hand to do it all at once.
Hopefully with completion of PPL, I’m heavily considering going to an accelerated flight school and finance training. I have a late start to this and little to no savings, I’ve read the horror stories, I’ve read the negative experiences, I know interest rates are high and might not get better. I’ve weighed it heavily with continuing locally but i would never be able to get a ATP license or build up hours in time. Also personal loans to finance training don’t really seem attractive since they won’t have a grace period while finding a job.
Any accelerated flight school I attend which I’m still researching I plan to get as many tests done before hand, or whatever I’m allowed to get done before starting with them.
After that look for a job using the certificates and hours I accumulate. Oh and pay back the buttloads of money I’ll have borrowed by then.
I know chances are I’ll be working jobs I hate until I land something good. Living most likely will be paycheck to paycheck while paying back money.
Is there anything else I should plan for? Something I’m not seeing at the moment that I’m missing in my plan? Or just opinions in general? I’m trying to pick as many brains as possible here.
Cheers.
submitted by CaptB97 to flying [link] [comments]
So I have lurked on this subreddit for a while now. Mainly researching, looking at first time posts about people asking opinions on aviation as a career and experiences in flight schools etc.
I’m leaning very heavily towards transitioning to becoming a pilot as a professional career goal, and hopefully end up flying for airlines. My free time hobbies revolve around a lot planes with spotting and flight simulation. It is the one thing that I have maintained a passion for since I first experienced flying on a plane over a decade ago. Working on an airport ramp really has also driven home the point that working with planes is something I can do forever.
As of right now based on everything I’ve looked through and read and places I’ve called this is my game plan. And I would like the opinions of all of you to see if there’s anything I missed or anything else I might consider going down this path and how to achieve my goals.
I have a First class medical coming up in the next week. I selected a first class because I want to be sure I can pass the most rigorous medical exam before I really start spending money.
After the exam I’m doing a discovery flight. Get the feel for flying light aircraft and see what it’s like and make sure it’s something I can do. Although my passion is there I just want to make sure I can actually do it. Sim and real life are different.
Next ground school, the flight school I spoke to recommended doing it online by myself before going in to do lessons for PPL. So I’ve figured the cost and timeframe to complete ground school, I’m leaning towards sportys but not sure if there are others which may be better.
After ground school, I’m most likely going to join my local part 61 flight school to get my PPL. I’m planning on paying as I go with money from a second job as this is basically a career transition I’m making and have no money on hand to do it all at once.
Hopefully with completion of PPL, I’m heavily considering going to an accelerated flight school and finance training. I have a late start to this and little to no savings, I’ve read the horror stories, I’ve read the negative experiences, I know interest rates are high and might not get better. I’ve weighed it heavily with continuing locally but i would never be able to get a ATP license or build up hours in time. Also personal loans to finance training don’t really seem attractive since they won’t have a grace period while finding a job.
Any accelerated flight school I attend which I’m still researching I plan to get as many tests done before hand, or whatever I’m allowed to get done before starting with them.
After that look for a job using the certificates and hours I accumulate. Oh and pay back the buttloads of money I’ll have borrowed by then.
I know chances are I’ll be working jobs I hate until I land something good. Living most likely will be paycheck to paycheck while paying back money.
Is there anything else I should plan for? Something I’m not seeing at the moment that I’m missing in my plan? Or just opinions in general? I’m trying to pick as many brains as possible here.
Cheers.
2024.04.28 22:11 drawingpills 25[M4F] #Europe #Turkey #Online / Artsy Geek Gymrat - Looking for my one and only
Hey, I'm looking for someone to spend my time with.
I'm a guy who works out regularly and I highly care about my appearance. I can easily say I'm above average but everyone has their own taste of course. I'm open to selfie trades.
I'm 6.1 - 185cm, white skin, black hair and eyes
I'm a Concept/2D Artist, and I'm also into 3D and sculpting.
I'm loyal, empathetic, and love to share everything with my partner, also expect the same thing.
I love melancholy in general, sad songs, sad environment, tragedy, dark fantasy...
I'm not thinking about having a child right now but in the future I might, hence if you don't want a child that's a dealbreaker for me.
Another dealbreaker is, having a high body count. Personally, I'm close to no experience (maybe none who knows) and I'm proud of myself because of it.
I'm only into serious relationships I don't like to waste my time on people.
My hobbies are: working out & powerlifting, jogging, spending time with loved ones (especially my cat), video games, reading manga, watching series, movies, or anime, skincare, hair care, watching my ceiling while listening to my self suffering Spotify playlists.
I really like getting and giving attention. If we can connect I'd love to share my everything with you. I prioritize my partner and I expect the same thing. If you can't make time for me that's a direct dealbreaker.
I'm also an open book, I'm against having a private life from your partner. Take my phone and inspect it however you want, I hide nothing.
I'm an agnostic.
Well if you're interested, feel free to send me a DM!
submitted by drawingpills to r4r [link] [comments]
I'm a guy who works out regularly and I highly care about my appearance. I can easily say I'm above average but everyone has their own taste of course. I'm open to selfie trades.
I'm 6.1 - 185cm, white skin, black hair and eyes
I'm a Concept/2D Artist, and I'm also into 3D and sculpting.
I'm loyal, empathetic, and love to share everything with my partner, also expect the same thing.
I love melancholy in general, sad songs, sad environment, tragedy, dark fantasy...
I'm not thinking about having a child right now but in the future I might, hence if you don't want a child that's a dealbreaker for me.
Another dealbreaker is, having a high body count. Personally, I'm close to no experience (maybe none who knows) and I'm proud of myself because of it.
I'm only into serious relationships I don't like to waste my time on people.
My hobbies are: working out & powerlifting, jogging, spending time with loved ones (especially my cat), video games, reading manga, watching series, movies, or anime, skincare, hair care, watching my ceiling while listening to my self suffering Spotify playlists.
I really like getting and giving attention. If we can connect I'd love to share my everything with you. I prioritize my partner and I expect the same thing. If you can't make time for me that's a direct dealbreaker.
I'm also an open book, I'm against having a private life from your partner. Take my phone and inspect it however you want, I hide nothing.
I'm an agnostic.
Well if you're interested, feel free to send me a DM!
2024.04.28 22:11 LifeontheEdgeRunners Secrets of the Mountains [5e] [Online] [Saturdays 8PM CST] [Weekly] [Roleplay Heavy] [LGBT+ Friendly]
Hey there travelers! I’m currently looking for a few players for a new campaign in a semi-traditional fantasy homebrew world. We’ll be running weekly on Saturdays at 8PM CST. I’m looking for 5-6 players and I plan to be running a session 0 on Saturday, May the 4th (be with you).
This is a world I’ve been working on for a really long time so I’ve got plenty of lore and history for anyone curious, but there’s also plenty of room to tell any story you want to tell! So whether you like to come in hot with new ideas or base them off the world’s lore, anything is possible!I’m looking primarily for players who really enjoy the roleplay aspect first and foremost, because I love forming a party that gets to know each other and really get invested in shared story-telling. If you’re the kind of person who likes DnD streams because of the level of story, roleplay, and engagement, this is the kind of campaign I’m hoping to build! I really hope to focus on building a party that enjoys interacting as a unit and with an ever-expanding world full of secrets at every turn!
Despite my focus on finding players who love roleplay, I do plan on making a game that’s well balanced with a good amount of combat and exploration as well, I just want the players to drive the story! I think the best kinds of parties are the ones that learn to work together on and off the field. I also want this game to encompass everything that makes DnD fun! Roleplay, combat, exploration, decision making, I aim to have it all! To answer some questions I usually get asked as a GM
If you’re interested in applying, please fill out the google form listed below! If you have any further questions, feel free to message me here on reddit! I’m not sure how long this post will be up, but rest assured, when we fill up I will close the post and the forms, so if the post says we’re still open and applications can still be sent, you can still apply! Thank you all for your time, and I look forward to rolling with you!
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfpRnmmnX9xuOtj0UYzWgUBE9CNsgdTZYPuFkQPLnRR0kSvZw/viewform?usp=sf_link
submitted by LifeontheEdgeRunners to lfg [link] [comments]
This is a world I’ve been working on for a really long time so I’ve got plenty of lore and history for anyone curious, but there’s also plenty of room to tell any story you want to tell! So whether you like to come in hot with new ideas or base them off the world’s lore, anything is possible!I’m looking primarily for players who really enjoy the roleplay aspect first and foremost, because I love forming a party that gets to know each other and really get invested in shared story-telling. If you’re the kind of person who likes DnD streams because of the level of story, roleplay, and engagement, this is the kind of campaign I’m hoping to build! I really hope to focus on building a party that enjoys interacting as a unit and with an ever-expanding world full of secrets at every turn!
Despite my focus on finding players who love roleplay, I do plan on making a game that’s well balanced with a good amount of combat and exploration as well, I just want the players to drive the story! I think the best kinds of parties are the ones that learn to work together on and off the field. I also want this game to encompass everything that makes DnD fun! Roleplay, combat, exploration, decision making, I aim to have it all! To answer some questions I usually get asked as a GM
- I plan on using Roll20 as a VTT, with Discord for Voice Chat.
- I do allow homebrew, it just needs to be run by me first to okay it for balance. I also offer a fair bit of homebrew classes, subclasses, and races I’ve made myself over the years for my players to use if they like!
- We’ll be starting at level 4, starting equipment will be covered during session zero!
- World lore can be provided as soon as you’re in!
- I’m also looking for players 18+ only because as an adult, I’d prefer playing with other adults even if I don’t cover any kinds of graphic content at my table!
If you’re interested in applying, please fill out the google form listed below! If you have any further questions, feel free to message me here on reddit! I’m not sure how long this post will be up, but rest assured, when we fill up I will close the post and the forms, so if the post says we’re still open and applications can still be sent, you can still apply! Thank you all for your time, and I look forward to rolling with you!
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfpRnmmnX9xuOtj0UYzWgUBE9CNsgdTZYPuFkQPLnRR0kSvZw/viewform?usp=sf_link
2024.04.28 22:10 Medium_Specialist312 WTS m390 paramilitary 2
Good evening everyone, looking to sell this super clean no cut no carry PM2, I am the second owner and I installed the rec scales and flame bronzed hardware and rgt ultem backspacer on what started out as a dlt trading exclusive m390 pm2, action is probably one of the best out of all the pm2 versions I have had, centering is spot on and is just a good one all the way around, I think I did one paper slice and that's it, no sharpening,(already sharp af) just looking to get what I have into it 230$ 210 and I'll ship out tomorrow, Tuesday at the latest, 3 day priority shipping. Have a great evening and if you have any questions feel free to shoot me a dm. No original box but will ship in another pm2 box, which is the way it came to me. https://imgur.com/a/Zjc2M2Y TS and pics+vid
submitted by Medium_Specialist312 to Knife_Swap [link] [comments]
2024.04.28 22:09 OpportunityJunior379 22 [m4m] Canada/Anywhere - trans man looking for meaningful chat leading to long term connection
Helloo. You can call me A for now. I am a 22 year old trans man. I look and sound like a man, have had surgery to make my chest flat, but still have female genitalia. I don't mind answering questions just please dont be a creep and between the ages of 19-30
Lately i have been looking for something more meaningful. Dating these days can be tiring with all these mixed signals, ghosting, and catfishing/fake people. It'd be nice to have someone to chat with on a daily basis about life and what we've gotten from it and what we want from it. Or even some cheeky banter, it doesn't have to be deep. I also am open to sexting (pics&vids) to deepen our connection as that is important to me but only with the right guy at the right time
Im open to distance as that has never been a problem for me as long as we can meet up at some point and we ft, call, send pictures of our days etc. the bare minimum really.
I don't really care about appearance as long as you are hygienic! I am willing to exchange a face picture if we hit it off, this helps me get to know you better!
Feel free to message me about yourself, or ask for my discord and we can start talking there instead.
Hope to hear from you! -A
submitted by OpportunityJunior379 to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]
Lately i have been looking for something more meaningful. Dating these days can be tiring with all these mixed signals, ghosting, and catfishing/fake people. It'd be nice to have someone to chat with on a daily basis about life and what we've gotten from it and what we want from it. Or even some cheeky banter, it doesn't have to be deep. I also am open to sexting (pics&vids) to deepen our connection as that is important to me but only with the right guy at the right time
Im open to distance as that has never been a problem for me as long as we can meet up at some point and we ft, call, send pictures of our days etc. the bare minimum really.
I don't really care about appearance as long as you are hygienic! I am willing to exchange a face picture if we hit it off, this helps me get to know you better!
Feel free to message me about yourself, or ask for my discord and we can start talking there instead.
Hope to hear from you! -A
2024.04.28 22:08 therealalian It's all about who knows who (swipe)
 | I was bored today and decided to give myself a challenge. submitted by therealalian to u/therealalian [link] [comments] The Challenge: Find a random CEO and see if I can connect them with Michael Rubin through less than 10 mutual connections. It's all about who knows who, at the end of the day. I decided on Jonathan Greenblatt, the ceo of the Anti Defamation League. According to the Anti Defamation League, the Rothschild family is deeply rooted in antisemitic conspiracy theories which have been proven to be false by their standards. Alright, so let's see how long it takes us to connect the CEO of these claims to some really awful people. ;) At first glance it doesn't look like anyone I know follows this guy, but he does follow Melinda Gates. looks like this is gonna be easy So then I look at who Melinda Gates follows. (She is followed by Meek Mill, by the way, who is best friends with Michael rubin and also deeply involved with P Diddy.) Melinda only seems to follow Phoebe Gates, from who I know. Ahhh, but Phoebe Gates is very well acquainted with Michael Rubin, Meek Mill, and the members of the "all white parties", such as the Kardashians, Jay Z, Beyoncé, and many others. The Kardashians are very good friends with Michele Lamy, Marina Abramovic, LottaVolkova, and the rest of the creeps in the fashion industry who have loads and loads of pedophile allegations against them. (Please feel free to look up who these people are) The Kardashians are also very close with Travis scott, here's a concerning post from him last year which shows small sad shirtless children with marks all over them...... you'll have to swipe through to see them, slides 3 and 4 on this post https://www.instagram.com/p/CvOK2-ypmQh/?igsh=MWZpZXpiMHo3YWtyag== And here's travis's promo for the Astroworld event which 10 kids were killed at on November 5th 2021.... https://www.instagram.com/p/CV21s_2LWI9/?igsh=NHpmZW51bWVvYXF4 Kim Kardashian was just seen with Kamala Harris at the white house yesterday too... https://www.instagram.com/p/C6SBrpOSzlT/?igsh=anFndDl3ZWVlNHIw Also here's a fucked up ad from Kim recently where she jokes about climate change and says the future is getting hotter, so her nipples will always stay cold.. https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cy6H6RGR4aK/?igsh=MXBpZGRld24xNmZoZA== The Kardashians are also friends with the Hiltons, like Paris and Nicky Hilton. Nicky however is married directly into the Rothschild family! How wonderful! It didn't take me long at all to find connections to some real life scum bags from Jonathan Greenblatt, now did it? Here's a recent ad from Paris Hilton featuring her AI clones. She literally says "The future is so hot, it's burning!" https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6Bkz0cuiCk/?igsh=MTdjYmFvOWx0YXpoag== Someone get me out of this dystopian hell hole man 😫😅😂😂😂😂 |
2024.04.28 22:04 tall_snow_white Should I fire my financial advisor?
I'm a mid-30s white collar professional with about $330K in an IRA. I started working with a financial advisor in my mid-20s when I was broke, with big debt, overwhelmed, and had no idea how to dig myself out. He helped me come up with a plan, gave me a lot of emotional support, and charged me $500 a year while meeting with me frequently. Once I got in a better position and started getting IRA contributions, naturally I asked him to manage my IRA. Now Reddit has me questioning if I am an idiot for paying a 1% fee to his firm.
I grew up low income and knew (and still know) almost nothing about finances or investing. I outsource a lot of things in my life because my time is very valuable (in fact, it has an exact dollar value based on the rate I charge) and so I don't feel bad for outsourcing things that would cost me more in time than what I pay a professional (ie, cleaning service, grocery delivery fee) or for things that would require a lot of time investment on my part to understand how to do. But I'm realizing I know so little about finance/investment that I don't even know how to keep my financial advisor accountable, and that is bad.
I recently asked how my portfolio performed last year and he said the return was 10% for 2023 after a bad 2022 (I don't know how it did in 2022 but will find out). I don't even understand if that is better than what I would have earned had my money been in an index fund. And even if I wanted to, I don't know how I would even go about managing my IRA myself and investing it in an index fund. I have no interest in studying stocks and investing in individual stocks.
So I guess I'm seeking advice on:
1) what information to ask for to figure out if my financial advisor is worth his fee or if I should try to manage this myself. I am meeting with him next week for an annual review.
2) what resources I can read to learn the 101s of investment so that I can do this myself or at least understand enough to keep a professional accountable.
One thing to add: I am also annoyed with my advisor because he knows I have had six figures in cash sitting in a regular savings account for several years (emergency savings plus saving for a down payment) and he did not push me to put it in a HYSA. I got that idea from this sub (thank you!) and stuck it all in a Wealthfront account (obsessed) and am now pissed that I could have been earning like $500-800 a month in interest for the last few years and missed out on free money. So that is also making me annoyed with him and questioning if this guy is worth it.
Thank you!
submitted by tall_snow_white to FIREyFemmes [link] [comments]
I grew up low income and knew (and still know) almost nothing about finances or investing. I outsource a lot of things in my life because my time is very valuable (in fact, it has an exact dollar value based on the rate I charge) and so I don't feel bad for outsourcing things that would cost me more in time than what I pay a professional (ie, cleaning service, grocery delivery fee) or for things that would require a lot of time investment on my part to understand how to do. But I'm realizing I know so little about finance/investment that I don't even know how to keep my financial advisor accountable, and that is bad.
I recently asked how my portfolio performed last year and he said the return was 10% for 2023 after a bad 2022 (I don't know how it did in 2022 but will find out). I don't even understand if that is better than what I would have earned had my money been in an index fund. And even if I wanted to, I don't know how I would even go about managing my IRA myself and investing it in an index fund. I have no interest in studying stocks and investing in individual stocks.
So I guess I'm seeking advice on:
1) what information to ask for to figure out if my financial advisor is worth his fee or if I should try to manage this myself. I am meeting with him next week for an annual review.
2) what resources I can read to learn the 101s of investment so that I can do this myself or at least understand enough to keep a professional accountable.
One thing to add: I am also annoyed with my advisor because he knows I have had six figures in cash sitting in a regular savings account for several years (emergency savings plus saving for a down payment) and he did not push me to put it in a HYSA. I got that idea from this sub (thank you!) and stuck it all in a Wealthfront account (obsessed) and am now pissed that I could have been earning like $500-800 a month in interest for the last few years and missed out on free money. So that is also making me annoyed with him and questioning if this guy is worth it.
Thank you!
2024.04.28 22:03 GreenUserper The One Destined To Become Legendary! The Symphonium Crimson
 | Review Of The Symphonium Crimsonhttps://preview.redd.it/580hw69i0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=14b8c30f820adde859a716989e762a4a367c5610 Introduction This may be the first time I am assessing an audio product outside of the Chi-Fi business, but the company and their product, which I have previously been pleased with, are not new to me. Symphonium Audio is a Singaporean company founded in 2016 by three entrepreneurs who want to convey the delight of sonic bliss to the entire globe while also creating something special and unique. Many audiophiles, like myself, have previously praised their efforts and quality in producing such excellent products. I've already tested several of their offerings, including Helios and Meteor, which both astounded me with how easy they sounded. Though I wasn't able to evaluate them, I was fortunate enough to review one of their newest releases, the Symphonium Audio Crimson, but before I go any further, I want to clarify a few points. https://preview.redd.it/d8yr74hj0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=bd44cee0f21f566e019f0b1962d6b9ac17ecbca5 Disclaimer *This is a review unit, courtesy of Pritam from Audio Store. All thanks to them for providing. And as I've said in all of my evaluations, the same is true for this one: all of the concepts I've expressed below are entirely my own, original ideas that haven't been influenced by anyone else. If interested, go to this link. *I am not associated with the connection, and I receive no financial assistance from anyone. *For the remainder of the review, I will refer to these IEMs as “Crimson.” *I am using different Ear-tips for convenience and better versatility. *Finally, I will only evaluate the Crimson based on their performance, even though I will explain how it feels and seems physically and aesthetically. Specification The Crimson is equipped with an all-balanced armature driver made up of four BAs and three in-house created technologies. TrueX 4-way crossover is used for driver integration and employs two distinct but complementary technologies: FLAT and PHAT. FLAT ensures low impedance and immunity from impedance mismatch, while PHAT ensures no unnecessary frequency inversions or phase cancellation. The Crimson shell is made of high-grade T6 heat-treated AL6061 aluminium alloy, with a new colour scheme over the faceplate including a premium carbon fibre in the centre that pays homage to the brand's origins and resilience. The shell's design and feel are highly premium and minimalist in appearance, giving it a professional and distinctive vibe. The shape is also not an issue for my ears because they fit and isolate properly; nevertheless, people with small ears should be aware that the shells are on the larger side. The included cable is an Altalune Audio Novaron 26AWG Type 2 Litz copper cable with a modular termination on one end and a spring-loaded 0.78mm two-pin connector on the other. In my perspective, the cable appears substantial but feels light in my palm; it also combines nicely with the Crimson. The cable is also available in two variants: 4-core or 8-core unique offerings. The bundle also includes three different sizes of Azla Sednafit standard eartips, three different sizes of Divinus Velvet eartips, and a 3.5mm and 4.4mm termination plug. According to the technical parameters, the IEM's impedance is 6.05 Ohms and its sensitivity is 106dB. The frequency response spans 10 Hz to 24 kHz. The cable impedance for the 4-core cable is 0.12 Ohms. Sound I have come across the Crimson IEMs and I have to say that they are a cut above my best-sounding IEM, the Prestige LTD. The Crimson provides an incredibly enjoyable experience, surpassing any other IEMs I have heard, whether they are top-of-the-line or not. The Crimson’s presentation is expressive yet smooth, with a balanced and warm response that accurately reproduces the quality of the notes while providing a playful presentation of the vocals and instruments. The newer BA IEMs can sound less metallic or artificial, but Symphoniom has gone above and beyond in this regard. I have previously thought that the Helios offered better detail retrieval than the Thieaudio Monarch MKII, but I preferred the Monarch MKII’s pleasing tonality, which became my favourite at the time. However, the Crimson has now generously offered everything I wanted and more, including the weight and impact of the bass, and the musicality in the presentation of the vocals and instruments in the upper frequencies while retaining a pleasing tonality. I truly enjoy these IEMs and would like to explore their sound further to find out more about their exceptional quality. https://preview.redd.it/it0r6m3l0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=9cf2dc20365c1911be9dce77bdf168280a917bd2 Treble Upon careful consideration, I must admit that the LTD has a more vibrant and lively treble region than the Crimson. While the Crimson's response strikes me as somewhat crazy, its sound is airy and expansive, with both vocals and instruments possessing a comforting, nuanced quality that never compromises their tonal integrity. The passive, cohesive response maintains a mesmerising quality of the presentation. The upper treble offers a hint of zing, allowing cymbal crashes or chimes to stand out in the overall mix, which adds distinction and favourability for the listener. Songs like Kujira Yumemi's "Kenka" showcase the chimes in a stunning, expressive way, without overwhelming the listener and losing fidelity. The lower treble also offers a similar experience, with a direct, forward approach that does sacrifice the lean adequacy and sharpness of the notes yet brings vibrancy to the presentation. The notes have great energy, which is spread evenly over the entire region to bring each note to life for the listener. The separation between vocal notes and instruments is impressive, creating a clear and defined soundstage. Despite this, the soundstage never feels too wide or vast, allowing for a more nuanced, intimate listening experience. Additionally, the 4k dip creates a safer approach for the notes while maintaining a linear response. To sum up, the treble region's overall response is extensive, airy, and detailed, with a pleasing balance between expressiveness and fidelity. Mid Range The Symphonion Crimson offers a truly captivating experience when it comes to the mid-range notes of both vocals and instruments. The vocals are rendered with full-bodied emotion and realism, while the instruments stimulate the senses and bring the entire soundscape to life. Listening to Miller’s “Anytime Anywhere” with the Crimson is truly a treat, with multiple vocals coming across close, clear, and full of character. The upper mid-range is well-rounded and tonally balanced, with forward vocals that draw the listener in and playful instruments that make the presentation enjoyable and welcoming. Compared to the Monarch MKII, the Crimson’s response is even better, with superior revelation of both vocals and instruments, albeit at the expense of some openness and spaciousness. The response is still lively, keeping the listener engaged and interested. The impact of the high and low notes is naturally occurring and true to life, with a dense quality that is particularly impressive for a response that relies solely on BAs. While the lower notes can sometimes feel hollow, the lower mid-range maintains a heftiness without becoming muddy or mumbly. Overall, the mid-range presentation of the Crimson is authentic, expressive, and truly captivating. Bass When it comes to the bass response of this particular IEM, it is truly remarkable. It is the best bass I have heard from an all-BA IEM that falls under this price range. The tuning is such that it follows a neutral with sub-bass boost tuning, which results in an exceptional listening experience. What is particularly impressive is how the BA bass can deliver such quality and flexibility that is on par with what a dynamic driver can produce. However, what sets it apart is the cleanliness and accuracy of the impact of the notes. It is different from the natural decay that a dynamic driver produces but in an admirable way. The impactful notes are truly a delight for my ears, and I enjoy the weight and quality of the sound. The bass response is well-balanced and emphasises the sub-bass region, while also allowing for the mid-bass presence to be sustained. The deep rumble and punch of the bass have a noticeable impact on the response, making it an effective occurrence. The mid-bass presence brings a warmer response to the sound and delivers nice slams and powerful thumps in the mix. The mid-bass does leak into the lower mid-range, but it is not enough to detract from the overall quality of the sound. As you listen, you can feel the air pressure filling up your ears, giving you a sense of thumps and heaviness, while still resolving fast to keep the upper frequencies clean and clear. All in all, this IEM delivers an exceptional bass response that is sure to impress. Technical Performance As an avid audiophile, I must say that the technical prowess of the Crimson IEM is truly marvellous in my eyes. However, I must admit that I haven’t given as much time to other IEMs around this price range, which makes it a bit difficult for me to evaluate it fairly. That being said, when it comes to comparisons, I can only truly compare it to the Thieaudio Monarch MKII or Thieaudio Prestige LTD. In terms of sound response, the Crimson IEM is more intimate and better expressed in terms of forwardness and involvement in the mix. To be more specific, the sound quality is simply outstanding and the level of detail and clarity is unmatched. https://preview.redd.it/dau6zw8m0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=53d36898d8f399f5f1f727cec64055ba51e9c4be Soundstage, Sound Imaging & Separation Although the stage gives a more holographic response, it falls short in the closer approach, where the notes sound fuller and more complete. The sharpness and cleanliness of the notes, however, do provide great imaging capabilities. Even with such a response, the separation between the notes is surprisingly distinctive, which helps to better understand the direction of the sound. Nevertheless, when I compare it to the LTD or Monarch MKII, I find it to be a little stepped back. These two bring a more spacious sound while generating strong imaging and better distinction between the notes. Speed & Resolution When I listen to LTD, it gives me a clear understanding of what resolution is. The Crimson defines it as having a highly detailed response, whether it’s macro or micro details. The notes’ attack and decay are fast-paced, yet not too fast or slow, creating a natural sound. However, sometimes, it fails to achieve that natural sound. Sound Impressions Sources Sony WM1A - While listening to the Crimson with WM1A, I noticed a marked improvement in the vocal expression and note clarity. The notes were crisp and clear, and the overall sound was simply stunning. The treble had an airy quality to it, which allowed the vocals to sound even more expressive and complete. However, this did come at the cost of sounding a little light, which sometimes resulted in a faint sibilance in the lower treble region. Despite this, the tonal balance remained undisturbed. Additionally, the bass had a fuller and richer sound, whether in the sub-bass or mid-bass range. The upper frequencies were kept clean, but the impact of the bass made it sound organic and natural. Overall, listening to the Crimson with WM1A was a truly exceptional experience. https://preview.redd.it/vjd8ar9n0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=1afc0487dd766881b2f182832b0eb75ae60644d5 Tempotec V6 - As I was listening to the Crimson with V6, I couldn’t help but notice the forwardness of the vocals in the overall response. The treble was exceptionally smoothed over, and the mid-range vocals were pushed up, resulting in a more vocal-centric sound. However, when it came to the bass, I was pleasantly surprised to find that even though it was well-controlled, it still managed to deliver a powerful punch. The result was a slightly dark, yet energetic response that left me thoroughly impressed. https://preview.redd.it/wl6zjs7o0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=368153900072e91e508b5fd93bce754712742ca8 Simgot DEW4X - As I was listening to music on the Crimson with DEW4X, I couldn't help but notice the transparent response and enhancement over all frequencies. The sound was clearer and more expressive than ever before, with every detail feeling stronger and more potent in the mix. This allowed for better clarity overall, making it easier to hear every note and nuance in the music. However, while the bass and treble did feel a little more linear and clearer, it also made the music sound less organic and natural. The tonality faced a leaner presentation of the notes, which might not be preferable for those who prefer a warmer, more natural sound. https://preview.redd.it/ihlfb17p0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=3671d16c1fec6446ddf512eb774b078ba9642d70 Quloos MUB1 - During my listening experience with the Crimson and MUB1, I couldn’t help but notice how the response of the sound felt soft and rounded. While the detailed aspects of the notes were not as prominent, there was an improved grasp over the tonal quality which made the listening experience quite enjoyable. Another aspect that stood out was the spaciousness of the response, which allowed the vocals to sound open and free. Additionally, the treble felt extensive and airy, while the bass took a backseat in terms of power and impact, resulting in a sound that was warmer and more mellow than before. Overall, the listening experience was quite pleasant. https://preview.redd.it/30tzs93q0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=dc5420971a0ad5587c801f518f9205a5271e94de Comparison Between Symphonium Crimson and Thieaudio Prestige LTD Despite having similar frequency responses, I found both to be distant in sound, primarily because of the different configuration setups of drivers and synergy across the frequency response spectrum. The Crimson responds in a more fun and lively manner, bringing forth a lot of energy in both the instruments and the vocals. Nonetheless, I do believe that the Prestige LTD generates a sound that is larger and more expansive, with more zing and sparkle in the air and a strong overall contrast in the notes. The Prestige LTD's leaner response sounds a little more mysterious and captivating, but the Crimson does a better job of tonally accurate note depiction than the Prestige LTD. The Prestige has a more U-shaped sound than the Crimson, and as a result, it has a less forgiving and warmer tone with finer details. The Prestige LTD enhances the texture and details more than the Crimson, but the Prestige LTD wins out when it comes to the bass response's natural decay and dynamic physicality. The bass response in the Crimson is more precise and noticeable overall. The energy in the overall mix is more concentrated within Crimson, which accentuates the forwardness and lively response; however, the Prestige LTD produces a well-balanced response that allows for great separation, layering, imaging, and staging in terms of technical sound, resulting in a better perception of depth and width than the Crimson. Overall, I feel the Crimson to be more melodic and delightful to listen to, whilst the Prestige LTD provides an accurate understanding of sound and its features. https://preview.redd.it/ngcpsgfr0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=4488cff134b68d8f67752e7315970e74a37df76a Tracks Millet - Anytime Anywhere Anri - I can’t stop the loneliness Kohana Lam - A Few Sentimental Kohana Lam - Loving Me, Loving You Uru - Kimino Shiawasewo Uru - Kamihitoe Kujira Yumemi - Kenka Majiko - Kokoronashi Anly - Sukinishinayo Miliyah - Kono Yumega Samerumade Rokudenashi - The Flame Of Love Yu-Peng Chen - A New Day with Hope Yu-Peng Chen - Another Hopeful Tomorrow Yu-Peng Chen - For Riddles, for Wonders Valentino Khan - Satellite Kai Wachi - Happier By Now Jawns - Erotica ISOxo - how2fly Kai Wachi - Happier By Now Weeknd - Popular YUNGBLUD - When We Die(Can We Still Get High) Bring to Horizon - Kool-Aid Middle Kids - Bend FLETCHER - Leads Me On Loathe - Aggressive Evolution The Weeknd - Save Your Tears Sigrid - Burning Bridges AURORA - Black Water Lilies AURORA - Runaway X Ambassadors - Renegades Lupe Fiasco - Words I Never Said Macklemore & Ryan Lewis - Can’t Hold Us Gotye - Somebody That I Used To Know Jay-Z - Run This Town Lady Gaga - Poker Face Lady Gaga - Just Dance Ladytron - Ghost Travis - Love Will Come Through LINKIN PARK - Somewhere I Belong DJ Shadow - Six Days (Remix) Hoobastank - The Reason Ricky Martin - I Don’t Care Tool - 7empest Tool - Vicarious A Flock Of Seagulls - Space Age Love Song Zack Hemsey - Vengeance Elton John - I’m Still Standing The Moody Blues - Nights In White Satin Micheal Sembello - Maniac Guns N’ Roses - Sweet Child O’ Mine A.R. Rahman - Kun Faya Kun Conclusion To end this review, What Symphonium Audio strides to achieve and what goals they have set have been validated by Crimson, The precision in quality and redefining the parameters of elegance in sound reproduction is achieved through Crimson. The musical and lively response with robust and cohesive quality across the overall tuning makes it one of the most enjoyable, detailed and engaging IEM. A wonderful and satisfying innovation, to be sure. However, I cannot speak for the audiophile community when it comes to whether the price justifies the overall offering. However, when I compared my beloved PRESTIGE LTD to Crimson, I found the Crimson to be on par with LTD while offering a different taste, so Crimson has my wholehearted recommendation. You won't be able to let them go once you get them on your ears, I promise. https://preview.redd.it/vgczgyrs0axc1.png?width=4032&format=png&auto=webp&s=24629e9d3968095aa932cd925acd454c58e971e9 |
2024.04.28 21:54 __jare__ My never ending road to straddle planche
Hi, first of all, thanks for the time you're going to spend reading this. I'm writing these due to my frustration on trying to achieve the straddle planche. I'll explain my journey since I started training calisthenics, how I set myself the straddle planche as a goal, and how I still try to achieve it.
BACKGROUND
I'm 25 years old, my height is 182cm and I weight around 76kg.
I started calisthenics 6 years ago with little knowledge about bodyweight and strenght training. I was athletic but never before trained for strenght. I use to go swimming a couple times per week since I was a child, played tennis for 8-10 years, did a year or two of running occasionaly and the year before starting calisthenics I trained a bit in a gym.
JOURNEY
My first year I trained occasionaly, playing around with dynamic and strenght elements. I learnt the muscle up (not really clean), started doing handstands and some freestyle movements.
After that, I spent 3 years training consistently for strenght. It was during that period when I set myselft the unrealistic goals to achieve front lever, planche and a bunch of cool movements more. I used different methods, routines and changed focus a bunch of times.
For the end of that period, I achieved the following: - +60s HS - free HSPU 5-8 reps - bent arm press to HS (tuck, L) 8-10 reps - 90° HSPU / HS EL HS (1 rep, multiple sets) - 45/75° V-sit (shoulders rounded forward) - BL hold 15-20s - BL pullout - 5-7s full FL - adv tuck FL for reps - +15s bar adv tuck PL - 1.65 BW weighted dip - strict bar MU 10-12 reps
The last 2 years I've been training artistic gymnastics too. Depending on the period, I've been alternating the frequency of each kind, training for strenght between 1 and 3 times per week.
I also bought OG2 and really learnt about bodyweight training (I wish I knew about the book earlier in my journey). My training plans got a lot better, I realised the difficulty of the goals I set for myself and tried to train a bit more for balance.
Currently, I'm still training gymnastics with 1-2 days of full body strenght per week. My goals are: fixing imbalances and get a 3x5-10s straddle planche but I'm still far from achieving it.
QUESTIONS
Should I be able to do all level 7 exercises before achieving the straddle?
One of my current exercises is the Str Std Press with band assistance. I really suck at straight arm pressing, never knew what I lack. - Is it worth achieving these skills before the straddle? Until I get to L-sit presses, I feel they don't have much carry over to planche. - How can I spot my weak points in the movement? I think it could be lack of scapula muscles strenght but I don't know how to know for sure or how to solve it. - Is band assistance a good method? I trained wall assisted presses and got it for reps and sets, but stepping ouside the wall is too hard for me
I also train PPPUs for the straddle, but I sometimes feel I don't lean enough. - Is leaning only a matter of shoulder strenght or is there any other factor? - is it efficient to train only PPPUs increasing lean over time or should I train the whole range of motion with other exercises?
After reading OG2, I realised I was rounding my shoulders forward while L/V-sit. With proper retraction, I've dificculty lifting more than 30°. I'm trying to fix it adding some scapula retraction exercises. - could a lack of strenght here limit my progress on the straddle PL? - should I get a 100° V-sit to get a straddle planche
During these years, I lost my FL hold. My guess is that I trained too specifically but never got the brute strenght to maintain it. I'm able to do 1.40 BW weighted pull up for 4-6 reps, L-clap pull ups and R archer pull ups. - Is specificity that easy to loose? - If I had it back, what should I train to not lose it again? - should I get level 7-8 on weighted pull ups before trying again to train for the FL?
In my best shape after some months training for the straddle and 90° HSPU I got some 3s straddle holds. However, I soon lost it. Again, was it specificity but lack of strenght?
CONCLUSION
Achieving the straddle planche is still a far goal. What it concerns me the most is how should I train and focus to get it. Am I simply not strong enough? Aren't these years enough to be? Have I not trainef good enough? How much dedication I need to put? Should I proritize straddle planche training over being balanced? Is it simply a goal I'll never achieve?
Thank you so much!
submitted by __jare__ to overcominggravity [link] [comments]
BACKGROUND
I'm 25 years old, my height is 182cm and I weight around 76kg.
I started calisthenics 6 years ago with little knowledge about bodyweight and strenght training. I was athletic but never before trained for strenght. I use to go swimming a couple times per week since I was a child, played tennis for 8-10 years, did a year or two of running occasionaly and the year before starting calisthenics I trained a bit in a gym.
JOURNEY
My first year I trained occasionaly, playing around with dynamic and strenght elements. I learnt the muscle up (not really clean), started doing handstands and some freestyle movements.
After that, I spent 3 years training consistently for strenght. It was during that period when I set myselft the unrealistic goals to achieve front lever, planche and a bunch of cool movements more. I used different methods, routines and changed focus a bunch of times.
For the end of that period, I achieved the following: - +60s HS - free HSPU 5-8 reps - bent arm press to HS (tuck, L) 8-10 reps - 90° HSPU / HS EL HS (1 rep, multiple sets) - 45/75° V-sit (shoulders rounded forward) - BL hold 15-20s - BL pullout - 5-7s full FL - adv tuck FL for reps - +15s bar adv tuck PL - 1.65 BW weighted dip - strict bar MU 10-12 reps
The last 2 years I've been training artistic gymnastics too. Depending on the period, I've been alternating the frequency of each kind, training for strenght between 1 and 3 times per week.
I also bought OG2 and really learnt about bodyweight training (I wish I knew about the book earlier in my journey). My training plans got a lot better, I realised the difficulty of the goals I set for myself and tried to train a bit more for balance.
Currently, I'm still training gymnastics with 1-2 days of full body strenght per week. My goals are: fixing imbalances and get a 3x5-10s straddle planche but I'm still far from achieving it.
QUESTIONS
Should I be able to do all level 7 exercises before achieving the straddle?
One of my current exercises is the Str Std Press with band assistance. I really suck at straight arm pressing, never knew what I lack. - Is it worth achieving these skills before the straddle? Until I get to L-sit presses, I feel they don't have much carry over to planche. - How can I spot my weak points in the movement? I think it could be lack of scapula muscles strenght but I don't know how to know for sure or how to solve it. - Is band assistance a good method? I trained wall assisted presses and got it for reps and sets, but stepping ouside the wall is too hard for me
I also train PPPUs for the straddle, but I sometimes feel I don't lean enough. - Is leaning only a matter of shoulder strenght or is there any other factor? - is it efficient to train only PPPUs increasing lean over time or should I train the whole range of motion with other exercises?
After reading OG2, I realised I was rounding my shoulders forward while L/V-sit. With proper retraction, I've dificculty lifting more than 30°. I'm trying to fix it adding some scapula retraction exercises. - could a lack of strenght here limit my progress on the straddle PL? - should I get a 100° V-sit to get a straddle planche
During these years, I lost my FL hold. My guess is that I trained too specifically but never got the brute strenght to maintain it. I'm able to do 1.40 BW weighted pull up for 4-6 reps, L-clap pull ups and R archer pull ups. - Is specificity that easy to loose? - If I had it back, what should I train to not lose it again? - should I get level 7-8 on weighted pull ups before trying again to train for the FL?
In my best shape after some months training for the straddle and 90° HSPU I got some 3s straddle holds. However, I soon lost it. Again, was it specificity but lack of strenght?
CONCLUSION
Achieving the straddle planche is still a far goal. What it concerns me the most is how should I train and focus to get it. Am I simply not strong enough? Aren't these years enough to be? Have I not trainef good enough? How much dedication I need to put? Should I proritize straddle planche training over being balanced? Is it simply a goal I'll never achieve?
Thank you so much!