Importance of compliance in healthcare staffing

Compliance in healthcare staffing is of utmost importance in order to ensure the smooth and efficient operation of healthcare facilities. It plays a crucial role in maintaining the quality of patient care and protecting the well-being of both patients and staff. By adhering to compliance regulations, healthcare staffing agencies can not only avoid legal penalties and reputational damage but also foster trust and confidence among clients and patients. Additionally, compliance in healthcare staffing can contribute to the growth of business by attracting new clients and retaining existing ones. To grow business, healthcare staffing agencies must prioritize compliance and implement effective strategies to ensure that all staff members are properly trained, licensed, and qualified to provide the highest level of care.

Legal and regulatory requirements

Legal and regulatory requirements play a crucial role in ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. It is imperative for healthcare staffing agencies to adhere to the set guidelines and laws to maintain the highest standards of patient care and safety. These requirements encompass various aspects such as licensing, certification, background checks, and training for healthcare professionals. Additionally, healthcare staffing agencies must also comply with federal and state regulations regarding employment practices, discrimination, and privacy. By diligently following these legal and regulatory requirements, healthcare staffing agencies can establish a solid foundation for providing reliable and qualified healthcare professionals to meet the demands of the industry.

Consequences of non-compliance

Consequences of non-compliance Non-compliance with healthcare staffing regulations in New York can have severe consequences for healthcare organizations. Firstly, it can lead to legal penalties and fines, which can significantly impact the financial stability of the organization. Additionally, non-compliance can damage the reputation of the organization, leading to a loss of trust from patients and the community. This can result in a decline in patient satisfaction and a decrease in the number of patients seeking care from the organization. Furthermore, non-compliance can also jeopardize patient safety and quality of care, as staffing shortages and improper credentials can lead to errors and substandard care. Therefore, it is crucial for healthcare organizations in New York to prioritize compliance and ensure that all staffing practices adhere to the established regulations.

Understanding New York healthcare staffing regulations

Licensing and certification requirements

Licensing and certification requirements are essential to ensure compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. It is crucial for healthcare organizations to manage their staff effectively by ensuring that all employees possess the necessary licenses and certifications. By doing so, organizations can guarantee that their staff members have met the required standards and are qualified to provide quality care to patients. Managing your staff in this manner not only ensures compliance with legal and regulatory requirements but also promotes patient safety and enhances the overall quality of healthcare services.

Staffing ratios and patient safety

Staffing ratios and patient safety are crucial aspects of healthcare staffing in New York. Ensuring appropriate staffing ratios is essential to maintain high-quality patient care and prevent adverse events. However, healthcare facilities in New York are struggling to find the right balance in staffing ratios, which can impact patient safety. It is important for healthcare organizations to address this issue and implement strategies to optimize staffing levels. By doing so, they can improve patient outcomes and minimize the risks associated with inadequate staffing. To learn more about the challenges and solutions related to staffing ratios and patient safety in New York, click here.

Background checks and credential verification

Background checks and credential verification are crucial aspects of ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. These processes help to ensure that healthcare professionals have the necessary qualifications and meet the required standards before being hired. Background checks involve thorough investigations into an individual's criminal history, employment history, and educational background. This helps to identify any red flags or discrepancies that may affect their suitability for the position. Credential verification involves confirming the validity and authenticity of an individual's licenses, certifications, and other credentials. This helps to ensure that healthcare professionals are properly trained and qualified to provide quality care to patients. By conducting comprehensive background checks and credential verification, healthcare organizations can mitigate risks, maintain regulatory compliance, and safeguard the well-being of patients.

Developing a compliant staffing plan

Identifying staffing needs

Identifying staffing needs is a crucial step in ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. One of the key factors in maintaining a compliant healthcare staffing system is the ability to retain medical professionals. Retaining medical professionals is essential for providing consistent and high-quality patient care. By creating a supportive and engaging work environment, healthcare organizations can increase the likelihood of retaining skilled medical professionals. This can be achieved through offering competitive compensation packages, providing opportunities for professional development, and fostering a positive workplace culture. By focusing on retaining medical professionals, healthcare organizations can ensure compliance by maintaining a stable and qualified workforce.

Recruitment and selection process

The recruitment and selection process is a crucial aspect of ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. It involves a systematic approach to identifying, attracting, and hiring qualified healthcare professionals who meet the necessary requirements and standards. This process begins with a thorough analysis of the staffing needs and the development of job descriptions and specifications. Recruitment strategies, such as advertising job openings, utilizing professional networks, and partnering with educational institutions, are then implemented to attract a diverse pool of candidates. Once the applications are received, a rigorous selection process is carried out, which may include screening resumes, conducting interviews, and performing background checks. The goal is to identify individuals who possess the required qualifications, skills, and competencies to provide safe and high-quality care to patients. By implementing a comprehensive recruitment and selection process, healthcare organizations can ensure that their staffing practices align with regulatory requirements and promote compliance.

Training and orientation programs

Training and orientation programs play a vital role in ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. These programs provide healthcare professionals with the necessary knowledge and skills to adhere to the strict regulations and guidelines set forth by governing bodies. By implementing comprehensive training and orientation programs, healthcare organizations can effectively educate their staff on the importance of compliance, thereby reducing the risk of non-compliance and potential legal consequences. Moreover, these programs also contribute to boosting revenue by improving staff efficiency and productivity, leading to enhanced patient care and satisfaction.

Ensuring ongoing compliance

Monitoring and auditing practices

Monitoring and auditing practices play a crucial role in ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. These practices involve the systematic review and evaluation of staffing processes, policies, and procedures to identify any potential gaps or areas of improvement. By implementing robust monitoring and auditing practices, healthcare organizations can proactively identify and address compliance issues, such as ensuring that staff members have the necessary qualifications and licenses, adhering to patient privacy regulations, and maintaining accurate documentation. Furthermore, regular monitoring and auditing can help healthcare organizations stay up-to-date with changing regulations and industry best practices, thereby minimizing the risk of non-compliance and potential legal consequences. In summary, monitoring and auditing practices are essential components of an effective compliance strategy in healthcare staffing in New York.

Documentation and record-keeping

Documentation and record-keeping play a crucial role in ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. It is imperative for healthcare facilities to maintain accurate and up-to-date documentation of staff qualifications, licenses, certifications, and training records. This includes keeping track of background checks, immunization records, and any disciplinary actions taken against staff members. By maintaining comprehensive and organized records, healthcare facilities can demonstrate their commitment to meeting regulatory requirements and ensuring the safety and well-being of patients. In addition, proper record-keeping enables healthcare facilities to easily provide evidence of compliance during audits or inspections. Therefore, healthcare organizations should prioritize the implementation of robust documentation and record-keeping systems to effectively manage their staffing compliance obligations.

Continuous staff education and training

Continuous staff education and training is crucial in ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. As the healthcare industry is constantly evolving, it is essential for healthcare professionals to stay updated with the latest regulations, protocols, and best practices. By providing regular training sessions, workshops, and educational resources, healthcare organizations can equip their staff with the knowledge and skills necessary to navigate the complex compliance landscape. Additionally, ongoing education helps healthcare professionals stay informed about emerging technologies and advancements in patient care, enabling them to deliver high-quality services. With continuous staff education and training, healthcare organizations can ensure that their staff members are well-prepared to meet the compliance requirements and provide optimal care to patients.

Addressing challenges in healthcare staffing compliance

Managing staff turnover

Managing staff turnover is a critical aspect of ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. With the constant changes in the healthcare industry and the high demand for qualified professionals, healthcare organizations must adopt effective strategies to address staff turnover. One key strategy is to prioritize employee engagement and satisfaction, as this can significantly reduce turnover rates. Additionally, implementing comprehensive training and development programs can help healthcare staff feel supported and equipped to handle their roles effectively. By focusing on these strategies, healthcare organizations can maintain compliance and ensure a stable workforce.

Adapting to changing regulations

Adapting to changing regulations is crucial in ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing in New York. As the healthcare industry is constantly evolving, it is essential for healthcare organizations to stay up-to-date with the latest regulations to maintain the highest standards of patient care and safety. This requires a proactive approach to monitoring and implementing changes in staffing requirements, licensure, and certification. By closely following regulatory updates and collaborating with regulatory bodies, healthcare staffing agencies can effectively navigate the complex landscape of compliance and ensure that their staff meet all necessary criteria. Adapting to changing regulations not only helps healthcare organizations avoid penalties and legal issues, but also promotes a culture of continuous improvement and commitment to providing quality healthcare services in New York.

Dealing with staffing shortages

Dealing with staffing shortages is a critical challenge faced by healthcare organizations in New York. To ensure compliance in healthcare staffing, it is essential to develop a comprehensive strategy that addresses the recruitment and retention of qualified professionals. One key aspect of this strategy is the implementation of a comprehensive marketing plan for dental practice. A well-designed marketing plan can attract potential candidates and highlight the unique opportunities available within the healthcare organization. By leveraging digital platforms, social media, and targeted advertising, healthcare organizations can effectively promote their dental practice and engage with qualified professionals. This proactive approach not only helps in addressing staffing shortages but also ensures compliance with regulatory requirements in healthcare staffing in New York.

Conclusion

The importance of compliance in healthcare staffing

Compliance in healthcare staffing is of utmost importance, especially in a highly regulated industry like healthcare. It ensures that healthcare organizations and professionals adhere to the necessary legal and ethical standards. The importance of compliance cannot be understated as it helps in maintaining patient safety, protecting patient rights, and promoting overall quality of care. In New York, where healthcare staffing is a critical aspect of the industry, compliance becomes even more crucial. Healthcare organizations in New York must comply with state and federal regulations to ensure the well-being of both patients and staff. Failure to comply with these regulations can result in serious consequences, including legal penalties and reputational damage. Therefore, it is essential for healthcare staffing agencies and professionals to prioritize compliance and stay updated with the latest guidelines and requirements.

Benefits of maintaining compliance

Maintaining compliance in healthcare staffing in New York offers several benefits. Firstly, it ensures that healthcare facilities are operating within the legal and regulatory framework, promoting patient safety and quality of care. Compliance also helps to prevent fraud, waste, and abuse in the healthcare system, safeguarding public resources. Additionally, maintaining compliance enhances the reputation of healthcare organizations, instilling confidence in patients, employees, and stakeholders. By adhering to compliance standards, healthcare facilities can also avoid costly penalties and legal consequences. Overall, the commitment to compliance in healthcare staffing in New York is crucial for maintaining ethical practices, protecting patients, and upholding the integrity of the healthcare system.

Commitment to providing quality patient care

Healthcare organizations in New York have a strong commitment to providing quality patient care. They understand the importance of ensuring compliance in healthcare staffing to maintain high standards of service. By adhering to strict regulations and guidelines, these organizations prioritize patient safety and well-being. They invest in rigorous screening processes, comprehensive training programs, and ongoing professional development to ensure that their staff members are competent and qualified. Additionally, they regularly evaluate and monitor their staffing practices to identify any areas for improvement and implement necessary changes. This commitment to compliance not only ensures that patients receive the best possible care but also contributes to building trust and confidence in the healthcare system in New York.
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I’m 36w pregnant and I have never felt so lazy. This is my second pregnancy, but it’s come eight years after my first. Before being pregnant, I worked 12 hour shifts at a popular microchip fab as a chem technician. Once I found out I was pregnant, I left considering there’s no safe way to perform that job in my eyes while expecting. I’ve always been on my feet, super active. I go camping all the time(primitive style), kayaking, fishing, hiking, cliff jumping, running…you name it.
I think it wasn’t until around 20 weeks or so that I really slowed down to a damn near halt. I’ve been pregnant throughout the entire winter in upstate NY. I haven’t been able to go walking due to ice, cold temps, snow, or just simply not feeling like it. Also, I’ve had TERRIBLE pelvic pain this entire pregnancy. I have expressed that it’s been debilitating most times to my OB, to which he replies: that’s normal.
I want to say from about February-mid April, I just didn’t move around. I have had an impossible time sleeping, even with medication, since January so I naturally feel sluggish. I’ve laid in bed or walked around my apartment for those three months.
Now: I’ve been on iron for a few weeks to boost my energy per nurses recommendation and I feel much better energy wise despite not getting more than 4-5 hours a night of sleep. I’m carrying super low this pregnancy so walking is still awful. Doc still refuses to suggest anything other than it’s normal and to deal. Some days, I feel great and can manage it.
I guess I just came here to complain. I feel awful for being so inactive but I’m so exhausted or just in pain. Why does it feel like I’m in the wrong when my body just tells me to rest?? I WISH I could get out more and run again or do yoga or anything that involves moving around, but I just cannot. Am I alone here?

Hi all , so after a year on nsaids my consultant has put me on a biologics medication, this is my first ever biologics so I have a fear Of auto injectors can't even let anyone finger prick me lol , yet no phobia of needles so they choose adalimumab imraldi for me in a pre Filled syringe . 40 mg once every 2 weeks ...... now ive been doing my dad's biologics for 6 years for him he has the pen and different biologics. But since this medicine is for me I had to wait for a nurse to be here nhs rules I guess . So that day was today , now I'm not gonna lie While I don't have a phobia of needles I still put some numbing cream on incase which is fab as I didn't feel the needle at all so bonus There , however like others I'm going to give you some tips if your thinking of using a syringe 💉 . So the only symptom I had was a few seconds Of feeling a weird sensation pass through my body the only thing I can compare it to was like when you have a ct scan dye and you feel it In your body . A hour odd later I noticed that I could sit more comfortably and considering usually my pain is a 9 or 10 sat down I still Can't believe a medication can work that fast , the downside I keep getting random pains in joints I didn't have it I.e shoulder amd left side knee . All I can do is wait and see . However back to some syringe tips ...
I got all my bits out on a little tray with kitchen roll covering it .popped needle on there ,plaster , alcohol wipe , sharps bin
( don't forget to pop numbing cream on least a hour before )
So the syringe only needs 15 mins since its not covered in so much plastic but do keep it out longer if needed .
Now everyone is different but the nurse said she doesn't recommend the wipes as they can sting etc providing the area is washed and clean It's fine so that's personal preference .
The great thing about the syringe is your in control and that's a great thing since unfortunately here in the UK where my meds are from the Company have citrate in the imraldi both pens and syringe so yes unfortunately it will burn however quickly learned that once I felt a sting Or burn I stopped plunging waited a second and then carried on slow your in control .
So proud of myself, and for those doing this for years you are brave and for those waiting to start you are brave , we all are . You can do it wether you prefer a pen or syringe so long as we get pain free that's the main thing .
Father diagnosed inflammatory RA 6 years ago developed psoriasis last year re diagnosed as psoriatic arthritis hlab27 ( unknown ) Me diagnosed last year with axial spondyloarthritis via mri findings hlab27 negative suffered psoriasis since childhood

So I got a job in January as a dental assistant when I applied for the receptionist position. I got sabotaged and bullied that first month and was let go because I couldn’t learn everything it takes to be a dental assistant in less than a month. I got bullied really bad there and glad I got fired. Anyways, I have a new job now. All is good until last week a new nurse started and she continues to size me up, glare at me, talks to me with an attitude and gets aggressive/raises her voice sometimes. I went to my manager at the old company and this company and both managers said they had a talk with the bully. But it continues. She started last week! Someone also stole my flowers that I bought from Trader Joe’s yesterday morning. I carried them into a box and the bully was the only person to see me drop the box off (they were expensive) and they’re gone. I know for a fact she took it because she made it a point to comment saying I “have issues” because I bring fresh flowers to work every week. I didn’t tell my boss that I think she did it. But I left a note in the break room telling whoever took it to return it because it was for my friend in the hospital. My boss sent a mass email to return the flower. This flower is a exotic orchid I paid $30 on top of 4 bouquets of peonies. They only took the orchid. And it’s convenient that we don’t have cameras and the bullly isnt here today. Idk why I keep getting targeted? Not to toot my own horn but everyone sees she is bulling me and is saying that it’s because I’m very attractive and she’s jealous. Because I’m very very nice to everyone in the office. I even handed out peonies flowers that are pricy to the 17 women in the office. And when it came to me giving the bully one, she grabbed a different one out of my hand and said “I want this one” like? Why does this keep happening to me with women?!

Hey all! I had very large tonsils and reoccurring tonsillitis pretty much all my life! These last few years I was getting tonsillitis on almost a monthly basis, I would be prescribed antibiotics and a steroid but the infection would still carry out over a week. I finally scheduled an appointment with an ENT who told me that I was definitely knocking on the door for surgery, but he wanted to try a treatment plan first to see if that would work. I was put on multiple allergy medications as well as an acid reflux medication but to no avail. My tonsils became inflamed yet again, and just upon sending my ENT a picture I had my surgery scheduled. I have pretty bad medical anxiety so the lead up to the surgery was not pleasant. I was thinking of all the things that could potentially go wrong. I scoured this thread and read all of the horror stories from recovery, but I made up my mind and decided to show up on my surgery day! The initial pre op stuff was pretty nerve wracking, but the nurses and anesthesiologist did a really good job of calming me down. The procedure went great and recovery has not been bad as of now. I am on day 4(day 5 if you count surgery day as day 1) and my pain level has not gone over a 2/10. I do think because I was so familiar with the tonsillitis pain that this doesn’t feel much different. I definitely recommend to anyone on the fence to move forward with their surgery. While I’m not done with recovery, I am already noticing improvements to my breathing and sleeping! My tonsils consistently touched each other due to their size so that should give you insight into how large they were.

I'm trying to propose my site implement them but am getting some uneasy resistance from management. Managements main concern is that the bracelets wont be updated properly.
My points are:

• way faster to check in an emergency situation.
• its another safety check. We already have wrist bands for patient identifiers and one for allergies. We are supposed to be checking those wrist bands every shift anyway
• Currently, we have the code statuses on the EHR and on a printed sheet with lots of information about all the patients. Nurses should be carrying them with them all the time but sometimes they are left at a desk, get misplaced, or not brought in to a room with infection precautions.
• It would be much safer when covering another nurse's assignment for breaks, where you aren't very familiar with their patients. Also applicable if you are sent to another floor where you are unfamiliar with their workflow, patients, or other staff.
• If a patient were to code in an area without a readily available computer like during transport to imaging, or common area of the hospital, we would still be able to know their code status.

There are a few scenarios to consider:

1. In a scenario where someone's code status is unknown, we default to full code, and stop compressions only if indicated once their code status is determined by going and checking "the source of truth" being the EHR.
2. A patient who is a DNR getting compressions briefly while confirming their code status before stopping is an unideal outcome, however;
3. For a patient that is a full code, a delay in compressions while confirming their code status is potentially life ending. We should plan for the scenario to reduce the most harm.

• code statuses don't change very frequently, and when they do, they are a high enough priority for the nurses to actually make that change in a timely manner. Patient code statuses are already updated on the patient information sheet based on the EHR, so it has been shown that we can update them properly.
• Another option would be to have coloured wrist bands for anyone wanting CPR as that is the most time sensitive aspect, with no special wrist band for anyone else.

original setting by Michael McNeill
Myrla sat at one of the tables in the food court area of Nantrella Station. The Greylin’s crew had discovered several ships docked with family members on board and this had led to a rather impressively large impromptu family reunion with several dozen kwonese spacers gathered up in one space.
She was sitting slouched over the table, the only human in a sea of furry ratfolk, nursing her drink. It was a chocaf that one of the family from another ship had spiked with something s/he said was an intoxicant that she would enjoy. Myrla wasn’t sure if it was intoxicating, but it did add a pleasant richness to the drink and it warmed her in a way chocaf didn’t normally do.
She was reaching the end of her drink and was starting to wonder if she should try to find the kwonese who had spiked her drink to ask for a second round when she realized some of her crewmates nearby were talking about her. She hadn’t been listening, really, her mind just floating along in the comfortable feel of the “group-snuggle” as they called it, so she wasn’t sure what was going on.
After a few seconds of focusing on the conversation, she realized they were bragging about her. That was when one of them turned to her, dragging her into the conversation.
“Yah, see! This Myrla, she top stevedore, better than ya porter drone!” Nellin, one of the crew-family she had little interaction with other than when it was time to hustle cargo, had grabbed her by the sleeve and was tugging her into a small cluster of kwonese sitting around one of the tables. She only recognized one other face as being part of the Greylin crew. Nellin served as the ship’s load-master and chief stevedore, so she assumed the others in the group likely held similar positions on their own ships.
Myrla hoisted her cup in greeting, a lopsided smile on her face. Then she realized she did know another of the faces in the group – the cousin who had spiked her chocaf. Grinning, she pulled her arm free of Nellin’s grip and pointed to him then to her almost empty cup. “I’m going to need some more of that, cousin.”
This set off titters of laughter around the crew as the kwonese in question hauled out a silver flask from his vest pocket. “Powerful stuff, yah!” He made smacking sounds as he fixed her another chocaf from the table’s dispenser. “Makin’ it on the Yeongja, we do. Best you find.”
She drained her first cup and picked up the second. If it was an intoxicant, it was either incredibly weak or it was so smooth that it would hit her like a sledgehammer later. Either way, it was a delightful pairing with the bitterness of the chocaf. She took a sip of the fresh drink, smiling as the warmth seeped into her. The group shuffled around to make a spot for her to sit.
One of the others, a grizzled older kwonese, looked at her one eyebrow raised. “Nellin say you top stevedore. Say you outwork drone. Been load-master on Yeongja ten year and four more now on /San Matteo/. Not seeing that happen yet.”
She looked over Nellin and raised her cup in his direction. “[Samchun ]()[[MM1]](#_msocom_1) has never voiced displeasure with my work. If he wishes to say I work harder than a cargo drone, that is his choice.”
Her comment brought hoots of laughter from around the table. Out-bragging in a family was something of a sport with the kwonese and diplomatically saying they were boasting without calling them a liar was an integral part of the game, even better if you were doing so in support of them.
“Well-saying, [olinee]()[[MM2]](#_msocom_2) .” The grizzled cargo-chief crinkled his snout and raised his glass at her. “But now chincheog making me curious. Never seeing such a thing not being the same as impossible thing.” He paused to scratch his whiskers. “Not working much with your kind, true, so never seeing how much you can do.” Several of the group lightly slapped the tabletop and looked in her direction.
She glanced down at Nellin, seeing his whiskers twitching. His body language was just like it would be if they were playing cards and he were holding a winning hand, waiting on the pool to grow. Long seconds passed before the one she’d mentally dubbed “Mister Flask” leaned in.
“Let’s make it interesting.”
And there it was. Cred-chips started hitting the table and in moments, crew from all the ships were aware of the betting taking place. She sat, sipping her doctored chocaf, as the kwonese around her seemed to turn into a boiling pool of sleek fur and whiskers. Across the table, “Mister Flask” raised his cup to her … and winked.
She grinned back at him, returning the gesture. Now what was that all about?
One of the twins – probably Mikkeulon, from the scent – saw the exchange and leaned close to her. “Oh-ho! You catching Peulla’s eye, then! Good choice, but he wild.”
Myrla sputtered into her cup, but before she could say anything, the twin was gone. Then Nellin leaned in close. “You got this, girlee. Seen you move more easy. Just be going slow and easy and Greylin family got drinks for all station-time, ya.”
Myrla smiled to herself, shaking her head. The cargo-master may have said the Greylin’s crew would have all their drinks covered during their port-time, but given the kwonese need for these family get-togethers, “hajog-poog” they called them, every kwonese on the station would be regular visitors to the Greylin. The betting was just the method they used to pick which ship the party was held on.

It wasn’t long before the entire party had relocated to the docks where San Matteo was set to disgorge its cargo. The grizzled cargo-master, who Myrla now knew to be named Tostiklin, had one of the enormous cargo bays set up for the impromptu competition. She’d sent Orak off to the /Greylin/ to retrieve her backpack, leading to a humorous scene as the young kwonese came running into the docking area dragging the pack that was easily as large as he was. She stripped away the actual pack and her possessions that it held, leaving just the pack-frame. She tasked Orak with perching on the pack itself, to make sure it didn’t get lost in the excitement.
She walked over to the small cluster of cargo-masters and hefted her packframe. “I assume I’m allowed to use a cargo rack, since the drone has one?” She watched as several of them suppressed snickers and Tostiklin wrinkled his snout in amusement.
He waved absently. “Yahyey, of course! Wanting a fair run, we.” He motioned the cargo drone over, which stood almost twice as tall as its crewmates. The crowd settled down to a low murmur as the cargo master addressed the two. “This being the rules. Moving cargo for one minute, as much as you can, ya. No helping from others. No interfering with other stevedore. Move you stack from where it is to indicated position.” He pointed to a pair of chalked squares some thirty feet away from the initial stacks. “Is good?”
The drone’s head rotated from the kwonese to Myrla to the two stacks of cargo containers and back. “I to compete against this gentlebeing? Moving cargo like normal work?”
“Yes, Ledo.”
The drone dipped its head. “Understood but I do not understand why.”
Myrla leaned close to the drone. “They gambling on us. Who can shift more.”
The drone tipped its expressionless face first to one side then to the other while looking at her, a low whir of servos barely audible. Then it looked toward the group of kwonese for a moment. “Oh. Oh. Then … perhaps I should apologize now?”
Myrla grinned. “Apologize for what?”
“I am made to shift significant amounts of cargo. You do not appear to be. I shall apologize now for embarrassing you in front of your shipmates.”
Myrla laughed and patted the drone on its arm. “It’s all in fun, Ledo. I won’t be embarrassed.”
She could detect a faint note of smugness in the mechanical’s speech. “Very well. Then let us proceed.”
“Geebees, are clear on rules?” Myrla and Ledo both indicated their assent. “Then please stand by cargo.”
When they had taken their places, Tostiklin pulled a whistle from his pocket and blew on it. Myrla and Ledo began quickly assembling their loads. Remembering Nellin’s admonition, she carefully restricted her load, adding two containers more to hers than the drone loaded onto itself. It was enough weight to slow her down considerably, but she could still keep up with Ledo without straining.
Together, they dropped their cargo loads inside their assigned squares and Myrla fought the urge to race ahead of the drone, keeping pace with it instead. Twice more the cycle repeated itself, with Myrla carrying just enough extra to stay ahead in the count.
When the whistle blew a second time, the gathered cargo-masters counted the crates in each stack. Tostiklin’s face was a study in surprise as he counted Myrla’s stack again.
He looked at Nellin. “Your stevedore has clearly won. By a mere six crates, but she has won.” The kwonese erupted into cheers and groans, depending on the amount of credits they had won or lost. Tostiklin held up a hand and the crowd quieted down. “But you say she outwork drone. Win by six is much as keep up with drone.”
The crowd inhaled as a whole. /San Matteo/’s cargo chief was treading the fine line of being rude, almost accusing Nellin of lying. The older kwonese narrowed his eyes, looking for at Nellin, then Myrla, then at the crowd. “I like very much to be seeing her truly outwork drone. What is prize money?” One of the younger cargo-masters gave him the figure. “I say offering own creds to match that, double or nothing.”
The crowd went wild, the line of propriety saved. Myrla doubted Nellin had that sort of funds available, based on his change in body language. From behind her, she heard a female kwonese start chanting, “Match! Match!” She and Nellin turned to look, seeing Captain Wanniv shaking her fist in the air. In seconds, all the /Greylin/’s crew was chanting with her.
“Match! Match! Match!”
Nellin looked at her, his nervousness evident, even though things were going exactly like he’d told her they would. She winked at him and gave him a quick nod.
His bearing changed imperceptibly as he turned back to Tostiklin. “Yahyey, chincheog. You be seeing truth.”
Ban Baekui had sidled up beside her, patting her arm. “Time be taking off the governor, ya.”
She nodded absently, her gaze wandering around the room, watching as dozens of groupings indicated the level of betting taking place. “Got your bets made, chief?”
“Already making creds plenty. This to be sheer kwaja!”
She looked down at him, grinning. “The captain plays cards with Nellin, doesn’t she?”
Ban gave her a curious tilt of his head. “Frequently. Why you ask?”
Myrla nodded to herself, looking around again. “She backed him up at the perfect time. This gonna bring some notoriety to the Greylin. And that converts to …” She looked back at the ship’s lead mechanic, grinning broadly.
“Jobs. Bigger and better.” Ban nodded, grinning back. “Not playing cards with you, girlee. Best getting ready, then.”
Ban faded back into the crowd, leaving her with Nellin. “You good with this? Tossi want longer timeframe for this.”
Myrla dropped to one knee, making it so she had to look up slightly at the cargo master. “I need some advice, chief.” Nellin blinked in surprise at the abrupt change in the situation. When he signaled his assent, she continued. “There’s more going on than what I’m seeing. You just used a blood-kin name for him. The captain backed you up publicly under his challenge, so she’s now tied the two of you together, your win is now her win, and your loss her loss. Tostiklin almost called you a liar in front of everyone, but pulled it out by upping the bet.” She scanned the crowd, seeing several non-kwonese beginning to intermingle. “And that is interesting. More geebees are joining the party. And those aren’t spacers.” Her eyes narrowed. “Those are brokers – I recognize two of them.”
Nellin wrung his hands, a faint tang of nervousness coloring his odor. “Is … is complicated.”
“Not from my end, chief. Tostiklin wants to see how hard I can work, because he wants to learn more about my people and is willing to pay for the privilege. And he wants to see me lose to gloat…” She looked at Nellin as he started squirming again. “He doesn’t want me to lose.” She narrowed her eyes in suspicion. “Who is he related to by blood on the Greylin?”
“He brother to captain’s father…” Myrla’s eyes lit up in sudden understanding. “…and is brother to my mother’s mother.”
Myrla’s jaw dropped slightly as several puzzle pieces clicked into place. “He … he doesn’t want us to fail at all. He’s loaning the captain operating money as well as boosting the ship’s reputation.”
Nellin put his hands out to shush her. “Not be saying this!”
The good side of her mouth pulled up in a smile. “Don’t worry, not a word. Plus, by challenging you like this, you gain even more credibility with the family after I smoke that presumptuous cargo drone at his own game. You gain a reputation for understating how good something is.”
“See … is complicated.”
“Chief, go make your personal bets. This run is about to get interesting.”
The next ten minutes was a flurry of action as bets were made and new spectators arrived from stationside. At one point, Peulla drifted by, pressing another cup of that deliciously spiked chocaf into her hand with a wink. Soon, the cargo masters were huddled up again.
Tostiklin had found a voice amplifier somewhere, letting his voice be heard over the noises of the much-larger crowd. “We be setting round two. Nellin, loadmaster of the Greylin Bostlin, say he crewmate outwork cargo drone. We see earlier this geebee do that.” He indicated Myrla and she waved at the crowd, to delighted cheers from more than just her shipmates. “I say she barely beat cargo drone and I ask for a rematch. I offer double to see she truly outwork drone!” The crowd roared excitedly. “I ask to see geebee outwork drone and just minutes not enough. I ask for one whole hour!”
The crowd erupted into a frenzy and Myrla blinked in confusion. Nobody mentioned hauling cargo for an hour, she thought.
Captain Wanniv had slipped up beside her. “Just another day on the docks, ya?”
Turning to the captain with a smile, she said, “Using my own words against me as inspiration? I’m … well, I don’t guess I’m shocked. And yes, I’m good for it.”
“Is good. All this good.”
Myrla gave the captain a wink. “I love how they brought in some of the local cargo brokers and the Dockworker’s Guild to watch. San Matteo is a respected crew. To see them give the Greylin respect will carry weight later.”
The captain’s eyes crinkled. “I have no idea what you mean.”
Finally, the crowd calmed down again. Siezing the moment, Myrla stepped forward to address the Matteo’s cargo-master. “Samchun, it seems to me that all of our competition is being done handling cargo from the San Matteo. If we are unloading cargo, then am I working for you? And, if I am working, then as a member of the Stevedore and Dockworker’s Guild, I have to be paid or I lose my license. And I cannot bet on myself.”
The crowd fell to a dead silence as Tostiklin’s eyebrows rose slowly, first one then the other.
“FAIR!” Someone in the crowd shouted.
Tostiklin glanced in the direction of the speaker and turned back to Myrla, nodding slowly. “Wisdom speaks.” A grin slowly spread across his face. “I will pay you one hour with a bonus in proportional to how well you outwork the drone.”
Myrla nodded. “I accept these terms and your grace in offering them.” This brought a round of applause from the crowd.
“Again! This being the rules! Moving cargo for one hour, as much as you can, ya. No helping from others. No interfering with other stevedore. Move you stack from where it is to indicated platform.” He pointed to a pair of conveyor platforms some thirty feet away from the initial stacks. “Is good?”
Both workers gave their assent.
“Geebees, to your starting places!” Again, a blast from the whistle signaled the start of the competition. Both fell to their task and worked steadily, but Myrla thought it looked as though the drone knew it had already been beaten. For every stack of crates it moved, she moved twice as many. When it tried to match her volume, its speed dropped off significantly to the sound of overloaded drive motors.
They were well and thoroughly inside the cargo bay of the /San Matteo/ and the crowd was only able to keep up by watching on a series of holoscreens that had been set up for the purpose. True to Bae’s request, she “pulled the governors off,” falling into her work-trance, letting the crates guide her flow. The conveyor platforms advanced with them, never more than thirty feet away, making the job a bit less arduous. The cargo-master group was inside with them, as well, and Myrla shut them out by treating them like she did any other client who hung out to watch her work.
She was so deep into her work that the whistle caught her by surprise and Nellin had to physically intervene to get her attention.
“Is good, girlee. We done it. YOU done it.”
Myrla walked out of the cargo hold, blinking and shaking her head, trying to get refocused on where she was. Then she realized the entire hajog was chanting her name. Bae and Wanniv were waiting on her at the bay-door. Bae handed her a bottle of water and Wanniv grabbed Myrla’s free hand in both of hers. “You best lucky charm!” As the crowd caught sight of her, the chant broke into a wordless cheer that threatened to overwhelm her.
Finally, the cargo-masters made their counts and conferred together with a lot of nodding and one shaking their head incredulously. Tostiklin motioned her and the cargo drone forward to join them.
“Thinking it clear who wins.” He broke off with a grin as the crowd erupted into cheers again. He tried to continue twice before the cheering died down enough to let him be heard. “Seeing you never slowed down, girlee. Thinking maybe you having another gear or two.”
Smiling, Myrla shrugged as the crowd went wild again.
“And!” He held up a pouch for everyone to see. “And, here is your payment. One hour’s wage for a class five stevedore. And since you performed double what the drone performed, your wages are doubled.”
Again, the crowd roared and she fought to keep the surprise off her face. She was a class one stevedore and class five rates were significantly higher than she was used to getting. As she accepted the pouch from him, she leaned in to be heard above the crowd. “You are a wise and honorable gentlebeing, Samchun. May your words echo among many gajog.”
That got her an extra cheer from the cargo-chiefs and a pat on the cheek from a grinning Tostiklin. “You taking good-good care of the Greylin crew, then. So, let’s be drinking to this!”

Hello! I’ve been looking for a new bra since my baby was born a little over three months ago. I’m overwhelmed with my search and would like some advice or recommendations.
I don’t know if such a bra exists, but my dream bra would be breastfeeding-friendly (possibly a nursing bra, but not necessarily), look modest under a t-shirt (should hide poky nipples and nursing pads), and be comfortable. For me, comfortable means that it should minimize jiggling, be snug but not dig in anywhere, and not be sweaty (as much as can be helped when carrying/wearing a very warm baby). I’m especially looking for something that keeps my breasts from touching each other or the skin below my breasts, because that’s not fun when I’m feeling overstimulated. I guess this means I need some good support, but I’d prefer not to shape or accentuate my breasts a whole lot; I just want to contain them. Ideally, I think the band of my bra should come up under the inframammary fold, but I can’t seem to find a bra that does this on me; I’m rather saggy, especially post-baby. Nor can I find a bra that comes close enough to my sternum to separate my breasts.
I’ve tried a 34G flexiwire nursing bra from Hotmilk and initially liked it, but found it digs into my armpits and shoulders, and my breasts drag the underwire down lower on my ribcage than feels comfortable. I’ve defaulted back to wearing my too-old-to-read-the-tag wirefree bras (I think they were Vanity Fair 36DD?) and just pulling them up when I need to nurse. They’re still decently comfortable and definitely were more so when it was new; the band used to fit very tightly but got pretty stretched even before I started nursing. My main complaints with the old bras are now that I’ve gotten floppier, my breasts tend to escape when I run or bend over, and again, I’d really like something that keeps my breasts apart and off my chest. I’ve done some other shopping and trying on, especially of sports bras, but I haven’t found anything that fit in both band and cup at stores near me, and I find the buying-before-trying process of shopping online rather daunting.
The calculator made me a 32I/34H US (loose underbust 33”, snug 31.5”, tight 30”, standing bust 40”, leaning 43.5”, lying 41”), but the pictures I’ve seen of this size look much rounder and not as floppy as what I have.
I’m not sure if I need something different as far as sizing, shape, or style of bra. I’d love some bra recommendations, or even just advice on how to proceed. Thanks!

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temporary, ten, tend, tendency, tennis, tension, tent, term, terms, terrible, territory, terror, terrorist, test, testimony, testing, text, than, thank, thanks, that, the, theater, their, them, theme, themselves, then, theory, therapy, there, therefore, these, they, thick, thin, thing, think, thinking, third, thirty, this, those, though, thought, thousand, threat, threaten, three, throat, through, throughout, throw, thus, ticket, tie, tight, time, tiny, tip, tire, tissue, title, to, tobacco, today, toe, together, toilet, token, tolerate, tomato, tomorrow, tone, tongue, tonight, too, tool, tooth, top, topic, toss, total, totally, touch, tough, tour, tourist, tournament, toward, towards, tower, town, toy, trace, track, trade, tradition, traditional, traffic, tragedy, trail, train, training, transfer, transform, transformation, transition, translate, translation, transmission, transmit, transport, transportation, travel, treat, treatment, treaty, tree, tremendous, trend, trial, tribe, trick, trip, troop, trouble, truck, true, truly, trust, truth, try, tube, tunnel, turn, TV, twelve, twenty, twice, twin, two, type, typical, typically, ugly, ultimate, ultimately, unable, uncle, undergo, understand, understanding, unfortunately, uniform, union, unique, unit, United, universal, universe, university, unknown, unless, unlike, until, unusual, up, upon, upper, urban, urge, us, use, used, useful, user, usual, usually, utility, utilize, vacation, valley, valuable, value, variable, variation, variety, various, vary, vast, vegetable, vehicle, venture, version, versus, very, vessel, veteran, via, victim, victory, video, view, viewer, village, violate, violation, violence, violent, virtually, virtue, virus, visibility, visible, vision, visit, visitor, visual, vital, voice, volume, voluntary, volunteer, vote, voter, voting, wage, wait, wake, walk, wall, wander, want, war, warm, warn, warning, wash, waste, watch, water, wave, way, we, weak, weakness, wealth, wealthy, weapon, wear, weather, web, website, wedding, week, weekend, weekly, weigh, weight, welcome, welfare, well, west, western, wet, what, whatever, wheel, when, whenever, where, whereas, whether, which, while, whisper, white, who, whole, whom, whose, why, wide, widely, widespread, wife, wild, wildlife, will, willing, win, wind, window, wine, wing, winner, winter, wipe, wire, wisdom, wise, wish, with, withdraw, within, without, witness, woman, wonder, wonderful, wood, wooden, word, work, worker, working, workout, workplace, works, workshop, world, worried, worry, worth, would, wound, wrap, write, writer, writing, wrong, yard, yeah, year, yell, yellow, yes, yesterday, yet, yield, you, young, your, yours, yourself, youth, zone.

TL:DR at the bottom. On mobile, this isn't in the US before anyone comes in with "bUt iN 'mUrIcA...". I do not give consent for this to be published, reused, referenced or linked to by any other person, entity, corporation or anything else.
I was flying for work today, ended up getting through security screening and having lunch faster than I'd expected, so I had a few hours before boarding. Settled in a comfy chair, noise cancelling headphones in, Netflix on my phone, all was set to chill out and kill some time.
I'd been there about half an hour before even through the ANC headphones I heard a screeching sound and saw a flurry of movement. Wouldn't you know it, the culprit was (of course) a Boomer. Karen haircut, dyed blonde clearly over grey, toothpick arms and legs with that weird fat belly, and a face that would curdle milk while it was still in the cow.
A new mother was flying with her baby interstate (from overhearing the intrusive conversation, 6 weeks but also premature). Baby young enough and I'm guessing had some health issues as a paediatric nurse was taking care of the baby, in uniform, complete with medical bag and bagged containers with milk for the baby. Mother was clearly nervous and watching baby and nurse closely, though the nurse clearly had everything under control. In other words, the very picture of a time and place that you leave people alone and give them space, courtesy and privacy... If you aren't a Boomer at any rate.
Boomer had arrived at the gate, seen the nurse with baby and the mother, made this ungodly screeching and launched herself as fast as her legs would carry her body towards the scene. The nurse skillfully deflected the advance by turning her back and placing the child hidden behind her on the chair, so Boomer launched into an invasive series of questions to the poor mother, delving deep into highly inappropriate/personal questions that the mother clearly didn't want to answer. Meanwhile through this Boomer is tottering on her feet, literally swaying back and forth towards the baby and nurse, which the nurse continued to shield with her body.
After around 10 minutes of this, she finally retreated all of 20 paces to a standing desk/bench nearby, continuing to stare and do the weird swaying/tottering like she was barely containing herself from running back over. She continued to stand there for the next 15 minutes like this, until the nurse had to change the baby... At which point she launched herself back over, screeching again something incomprehensible, and started trying to PUSH the NURSE out of the way!
Having been keeping an eye on the situation, I got up, took the few steps to her and yanked the back of her shirt and pulled her away a few steps with a loud "what in the hell do you think you're doing?!". Cue sputtering and whining/moaning about how the nurse was "doing it wrong" and "only trying to help" and "can't expect a young person to get these things right". I continued walking her away from the baby/nurse/mother a few more steps before security was on the scene taking over, taking the boomer by the flabby arms and marching her off. Boomer continued to screech and carry on, trying to pull away and back to the baby.
Mother looked terrified, nurse was clearly unsettled but handling everything well (serious amounts of respect to her, if she reads this: well done. You're an absolute legend). A third security guard came up and asked me to take a seat for a moment, checked on the mothenurse/baby, before the other two returned having handed the crazy boomer off to federal police a few gates away. Drinks (I'm assuming coffee/tea by the cups) were brought for the mothenurse, one security guard asking me what had happened which I relayed while I'm guessing the same was done for the nurse/mother. Sat for a bit before the security guards helped them move elsewhere (a lounge maybe? Private room?) and federal police arrived to take a statement from me and collect crazy boomers bag. Even the cops looked weirded out by the whole situation, with lots of shaking of the head and WTF faces.
All in all, everything was sorted out reasonably quickly considering, and only had another half hour to wait before catching my flight. The troubling part is that other than it being in an airport and there being a nurse involved? Boomers do this crap all the time! They see a baby and suddenly they have to interject themselves, with zero consideration for whether their comments and questions are appropriate, act incredibly entitled, take zero interest in whether the parent is uncomfortable, and generally act as though because there is a baby they have free pass to be complete d###s.
/rant

Sorry for my bad grammar I’m not good at writing but i wanted to share. Around a year ago I (15F) at the time lived in a smallish house with my single mother, my mum is a very bubbly woman who can start a conversation with anyone and is loved by everyone. I remember one morning hearing her talk to someone outside my bedroom window just shrugging it off I eventually went downstairs to ask who she was talking too. Finding out she was talking to our new neighbour. She was very sympathetic towards him as she described him as very old (she said around 95ish) and lived by himself, a nurse coming to visit him a few times a month, my mum also found out while talking to him he had no family members as they all passed so it really was just him she also mentioned that he was a priest which I found quite creepy.
a few weeks had passed by and my mum been the kind woman she was cut our new neighbours grass for him and would usually strike up a conversation out of pity. I just want to mention that I never saw this man once I’d just heard about him from my mums daily rambling.
My house had a window at the top of my stairs that if you looked out of faces the priests house and as they were almost identically built there was a window facing right back at ours, again I never saw this man only his dim landing light on. It had now been around 3 months since I’d heard from the priest. This One night i will never forget, around 1am I’d gone downstairs to get somthing to eat and on my journey back up the stairs and too my bedroom I looked out the landing window out of just pure instinct. There on the opposite side was the old man , his hand gripping the banister as he helped himself up the stiars, the lighting was terrible but he was very skinny as old people usually are. Been nosy I stood there for a moment wanting to get a good look at him, he was hunched over slightly as he struggled to almost carry his own body weight and I swore I could see the ridges of his spine thought his shirt as he hobbled out of view of the window. Not to be mean but this freaked me the fuck out and I immediately went to my room trying to get that disturbing image out my head before I slept.
Around a week maybe two later the priests nurse showed up at our door asking if we’d seen him recently as she was unable to get into his house as it was completely locked and sealed. she hadn’t heard from him in over 4 months and was getting concerend for his well being. I wasn’t at home to tell her I’d seen him in the window as I was at school so my mother just said she hadnt heard from him either. The nurse called the police who broke down his door. I was just walking home as i reached my house, the police giving another blow at the door with like a pole thing i dont really know what it was all I do know is that when the door finally came down the smell that left that house could make anyones toes curl. All I can describe it as is when ur cat brings home a mouse and it dies under your couch without you knowing.
Rushing inside I immediately went up to my room. Peering out my bedroom window watching the police enter his house, covering their noses. I don’t really remember what happened after that except when they wheeled his body out in a black bag and into the back of a black van. It was sad really I’d never gotten to speak to him and I’d now felt guilty for been so horrified by his appearance.
My mum was also distraught by his passing and was talking to the police outside. The house took weeks to be cleaned as when he’d died all the windows and doors were shut, keeping the smell locked in.
When the police left and the street went silent again i found myself spending more time with my mum downstairs, she has always been religious so as we spoke she lit a candle for him out of respect and to help him pass into heaven. Bringing up the putrid smell I asked her what the police told her. And what she told me has stuck with me since that day. They said he’d died a few months ago and had been found, decomposing in his bed.
At first i just shrugged this off when she spoke, yeah it was disturbing but more sad nobody had noticed his disappearance. But then it clicked. If he died a few months ago, who was it that I saw through the window? I mentioned this to my mum, she also knew I’d never saw or spoke to him while he was alive so she asked me what he looked like.
Wispy white hair and a boney hunch. I still remember her face drop from a blush pink to a pale white.
We moved out a month later.
This story isn’t that interesting as I haven’t had many scary paranormal? Things happen to me but it’s a true story so I hope you enjoyed :)

The EXTREMELY detailed, mega-anxiety edition!!! Major events like consult and surgery day are labeled like this:
——— EVENT TITLE ———
Surgeon was Dr. David Whitehead and I saw him on Long Island (New Hyde)
Summarized list of major dates:
Consult: July 19 2023 Mental health letter acquired: August 9 Dates discussed: September 12 Pre-op appointment: December 18 Surgery day: January 8 2024 Post-op: January 17
November 11th 2022: Emailed northwell health for the first time, they emailed back saying to call. I was too anxious so I avoided it for a few months.
Called northwell a few months later but got too anxious talking to the person who picked up. They were being normal and talking normally, it was just personal anxiety on my part.
October 2022 - Early March 2023: Spent time talking to trans friends and family members about their timelines and processes for top surgery.
Looked into Penn medicine for a bit but wasn’t happy with the surgeons there, specifically as a nonbinary person. The patient navigational team however is lovely.
March 2: emailed Penn health patient navigation
March 3-10: correspondence and phone calls w patient navigation (absolutely wonderful people, some of the easiest phone calls I’ve ever had) Got lots of into on surgeons, things I’d need, processes etc.
Date unknown: phone call to Penn medicine asking about surgeons and possibly setting up as a patient (v long wait time on phone) Surgeon I had heard good things about only works w CHOP program and I’m was too old for that program. Other surgeons I was v iffy on.
March 23rd: Back to square 1. Called northwell again to set up an appointment. Everyone I spoke to was really nice. Could have set up an appointment within the week but decided to wait till the end of the semester. Scheduled a trans care and primary care appointment for May
Couple of calls In between for confirmations. Trans care appointment got moved around a bit and ended up being moved to a phone call.
May 8th: Trans care call: Basic preliminary questions like: Emergency contact, what you’re looking for, are you thinking of looking into hormones, experience w dysphoria or dysmorphia, mental health, and eating/nutritional concerns, things you might want doc to know, piercings or tattoos, do you do any drugs or drink often, etc. total call time was about 20 minutes. Doctor was incredibly kind, I still experienced a good deal of anxiety but the call was super easy, welcoming, and friendly. Got sent contact referrals for the surgeons, as well as trans-friendly therapists under my insurance.
May 9th: started looking at list of therapists and making respective emails and calls. Checking per session costs and double checking insurance. Most charge 100-150 per session. Got in contact w one.
May 10th: Called w first therapist talking about what I’m looking for, where I am in this process, if parents are supportive, and talking about costs. She was very friendly and affirming, wants to have a few sessions to get to know me and my situation before writing a letter. Understandable and expected, but frustrating.
May 15th: Primary care appointment: Went to northwell health primary care, parkinglot was a little scary (just a large lot with a lot of cars) but everyone working there’s is super kind. Office is incredibly affirming, pride flags and lgbtq+ art everywhere. Gave my insurance card, filled out some paper work, got called in pretty quickly. I have a needle phobia and medical trauma so I was panicking a bit in the office, nurse was good w me about it and doctor was very kind, I just requested to not have any blood work done that day and that was totally fine, so I could schedule that at a later date and go w a friend. Recommended to get blood work done before scheduling a consult w a surgeon. Also prescribed me a single dose anxiety med for the bloodwork which I was very happy about. I found over time that the anxiety meds unfortunately do little to nothing for my panic attacks personally when it comes to needles but regardless having a doctor acknowledge and respect that fear and listen to me was incredibly helpful and reassuring.
May 30th: Got blood work done in a different lab, went w a friend. Scheduling for that is super easy, I think I did it online actually I don’t entirely recall. they do take walk ins but I made an appointment to minimize complications and make sure I could prepare properly. Front desk/lobby area was a little spooky, but I think that is mainly just bc of my social anxiety. They take a urine sample, you give them your prescription, eventually they call you over for blood work. Quick and easy, tech was v nice and having a friend with me was incredibly helpful. Probably the best I’ve ever done with a needle despite the fact that I did still panic and get very lightheaded lol.
Got blood work results back within the next couple days, all looks a-okay! Neat :)
June 15th This day was incredibly difficult. I had my first session with a therapist to establish some ground knowledge around my dysphoria and the way that I view myself. Top surgery is something that I know from research and related experience Can be difficult and expensive to get and can take time, so much of my prep work has been on the understanding of taking things a step at a time and just knowing that the current way things are doesn’t have to be forever. It allowed me to be able to live with myself while prioritizing my health better. This read to the therapist as “not having the level of dysphoria [she’s] come to expect and look for in someone who is trans” and was largely based off the fact that I don’t want to go on hrt. Past that point I started to break down because now my method of learning to live with myself felt like it was actively going to work against me and prevent me from getting top surgery. I’m not good at talking about my dysphoria, I can’t imagine it’s easy for anyone, especially to a stranger I just met. It was rough, and I felt incredibly mentally drained after ending the session.
June 19th Called it quits with the first therapist, I felt incredibly disrespected and the one session we had put me in a mental spiral for days. It can feel some times in this process like the people you have to get permission from need you to be severely depressed and unable to wait another second for this procedure just in order to take you seriously.
After I left that therapist, I immediately got back to the list to find someone new. Spoke to a new therapist via email, but my insurance is kinda weird (Blue Cross Blue Shield out of state) so its off putting to some people. This therapist recommended I go through the office she started out at (Heart and Soul Counseling)
————- Time Skip ——————
IM BACK its time for some record keeping. Got super overwhelmed and lost the energy to document my process for some time so here goes.
HEART AND SOUL COUNSELING: My experience w/ this therapy office was mostly good. The person in charge, Jesse, was absolutely lovely and responsive. Never spoke in person, but any text/email interaction was prompt, respectful, and kind. The office is stellar with email/text communication, so I only ever had to call them once when I was initially inquiring about the office. This is something I wish all therapy/counseling centers did better, eliminated a ton of my anxiety and hesitation to speak to therapists.
I got set up w someone as quickly as possible and established what my goal was (to acquire letter document for my surgery team). I attended multiple session w the therapist, she was a kind lady but the sessions were unfortunately p miserable for me. We didn’t fit well, but I was willing to stick it out rather than backtrack on my process. She also did not invalidate me or accuse me of not being trans which was a major step up from my first therapy experience. Once I acquired my letter I did stop therapy there, I kindly explained to the therapist that it wasn’t a good match, but I may honestly explore my options at the office in the future. Receptionist there was also lovely and they had a cool fish tank.
———- CONSULT STARTS HERE —————
July 19th: CONSULT!!! My mama and I went to Dr. David Whiteheads office for a consult. Parking was a nightmare so I’m super glad I didn’t have to drive for this one (ty mama). Consult went really well, and the staff were all super friendly. Dr. Whitehead is cool, very chill energy and a bit intimidating, but I’m scared of everyone so that’s nothing new. First question he asked me is what I wanted/what he could do for me which caught me more off guard than it should have? I didn’t realize going into this process how many times people ask you what you’re having done even if it’s already written down, because there’s so much variety in what you can look for in the results.
We talked about the procedure, went through a slideshow n stuff, and discussed how I wanted a flat chest w/ no nipple preservation. They made sure to specify that my mental health professional letter had to include that I did not want nipple preservation because thats technically a “non-standard” appearance. Also had the first breast exam I’ve ever had in my life. Can’t say i’m a fan (not that I need to worry about that anymore!) Took pictures n measurements n such, and also discussed recovery supplies and care w me and my mom.
August 9th: After a plethora of painfully awkward therapy sessions, a decent amount of crying, and a couple breakdowns in friends cars/backyards, I got my therapist letter and sent it to the surgeons office. It ended up needing minor revisions to which I contacted Jesse from Heart and Soul and he got me the revised letter immediately. Unfortunately the surgical coordinator was out of office for the rest of the month the next day ;w;. Is how it be.
September 12th: Got a call from Surgical coordinator mid-painting class that I stepped out to take. Started discussing surgical dates!! She was kind enough to email the dates to me which was lovely because I was absolutely shaking/mind blank haha. There was an option for January 8th which felt like an absolute miracle the way it would work with my school schedule. It would give me a solid two weeks recovery time before spring semester began. Because it would be a couple months out, I was asked to contact her in the second week of October to submit documents to insurance.
(Timeline note: earliest date offered was in early December)
October 10th: Documents sent to insurance, predetermination started
October 30th: Received mail from my insurance approving my procedure as medically necessary (YAY) But! This is also where things get,,, fun! Dr Whitehead’s surgical coordinator, Alyssa, is a blessing and was very helpful and prompt with me despite the fact that I had to email her pretty constantly during this general time which I still feel bad about.
Around this time, my mom got diagnosed with breast cancer, which I reported to the surgical coordinator because it influences my family history (grandmother also had breast cancer). It was asked that I get genetic testing done because this could impact my surgical procedure. Now I’m handling the setup on this between helping my mom in her process setting up consults and considering her options because there of course is a lot of crossover to the steps I’ve already completed and am familiar with.
November 1st: Very kind person at cancer genetics calls me, sends me a family history questionnaire to fill out before I can be scheduled to see a genetic counselor. Filled out the questionnaire the same day.
November 8th: Called cancer genetics to check about scheduling, office was not open so left a message. Got a call back later in the day. I have a virtual appointment with a Genetic counselor Tuesday the 14th. Current plan is a mailed saliva genetic test but I’m going to ask if theres anything I can do to get results/materials quicker. If I can’t get results/feedback by December 8th my surgery date may get deferred.
Trying not to stress too much because there is little to nothing I can do about this, and I just don’t want to be sad. I’ve kept telling myself throughout this process to not get excited and not let myself believe anything is solid because something could happen at any time that might mess up my schedule or plan, and If I convince myself I’m in the clear, those changes will hurt a lot more. So far I think thats been a good move, because this really sucks.
My surgery date is still officially scheduled as of now as well as my first post-op. I will also ideally have pre-surgical testing done December 18th should I be cleared by genetics in time (Fingers crossed!)
ALSO! Def lean on friends if/when you can during this process. It can absolutely be challenging, and having a support system is incredibly important and helpful. I’m super lucky to have really lovely and supportive friends that are around to listen to me and send me pictures of stupid little animals.
November 9th: My mama is scheduled for her double mastectomy on December 4th
November 10th: Did some shopping with my mama for recovery supplies for double mastectomy/top surgery. Having watched a million and a half transition/top surgery videos and tiktoks and having read all the blogs and posts and tweets makes you a great support for someone suddenly faced with an upcoming double mastectomy! We might go shopping this weekend for some button ups and zip ups for her, clothes shopping is better done when you can try stuff on
November 14th: Meeting w genetic counselor: Victoria Webb, one of the loveliest medical care workers I’ve ever met. Had a virtual appointment with her to discuss and set up genetic testing. I explained to her about my situation w the proximity of my surgery and tight deadline as well as my willingness to do a blood test instead of a saliva kit to get results quicker. She was so incredibly kind and good with me, ended up being able to do a saliva kit and get results in time she deserves every good thing in life.
December 18th: pre-surgical testing: This was at the main hospital, everyone was really nice but I had a really bad panic attack despite being on Xanax.
The process is sort of like getting a physical. Measurements like weight and blood pressure get taken, lots of preliminary health questions. The people working with me were really kind and I was very open with them about my anxiety, it was visually apparent though anyway because I started crying the second we even started talking about the blood draw.
Once the equipment was actually brought into the room I started to panic. Both of the women working with me were really kind and helpful and tried to distract me and keep me talking the entire time, but I did still have a really horrible panic attack. Every muscle in my body locked up and I lost all my color, took a bit to get back to a spot where I could move and talk properly because my speech was affected too. It was a bit scary but funny to think about in post. Thanked the medical staff for being patient w me as always, a good portion of the anxiety is also guilt about making things harder for them. Got through it tho. Def eat before presurgical if allowed, I didn’t and that probably didn’t help!!
———- SURGERY DAY ————-
January 8th:
Ok so surgery day:
This day was very scary. Got my phone call the Friday prior for my surgery time which ended up being 1pm and I was asked to arrive around 11. Got there at 10 and went in at 10:30.
Called up to check in then in waiting room till someone brought me back to change. I told her right away about my anxiety with the iv bc that’s legit all I could think about. Got changed right after. I was generally shaky and a little disoriented the entire time because I was panicking but everyone was very patient with me. Clothes and belongings go in a bag in a locker and you get two gowns one that faces back and one that faces front. I was given underwear and a pad as well because lucky me I got my period a couple days before my surgery.
The pre-op area is a lot of little cubicles with curtain divider things, blue soft chairs, and medical equipment. Everyone I met and spoke to was very kind, but any time someone even suggested starting my iv I would panic. I was informed it would have to be placed in my hand and that terrified me, I’m especially anxious and sensitive about my hands and fingers. I think doctors and nurses tend to misunderstand exactly where my fear is with needles and ivs. It isn’t the pain that scares me, but the concept of veins and and anything being in them. Even writing this right now is horrible so I’m going to stop w any further detail. I spent the entire two-ish hours of pre-op absolutely terrified about this iv.
I wasn’t really keeping track of time but dr whitehead came in to do markings for surgery. They had cool rainbow socks on,big fan. Having your chest drawn on and just like, moved around n shit is such an experience. Felt bad because I kept losing my balance but doctor Whitehead is cool and I am 98% less scared about them now.
Probably my most favorite person I met during my entire hospital experience was the anesthesiologist. I know he told me what his name was but I couldn’t focus on or retain information at the time. He told me we could essentially put me to sleep with gas before putting the iv in and for the first time in probably a solid week I felt like I could calm down a little. He took a look at my hand and arm to check my veins which always does freak me out a bit but I’m more used to that kind of thing at this point and I know nothing bad is going to happen. One of the nurses came in with the iv equipment and he let her know that were going to wait till in the or which was also incredibly helpful because I absolutely panicked when I saw that little supply kit again.
V nice lady brought me into the or, I’d never been in one before it was cool. They had a little music speaker which was really cool. Took off blue jacket gown and they helped me onto the table. They put a warm blanket over my legs and my chest to help me calm down. Before long they gave me a mask w fun happy sleepy time gas, they let me keep my arms on my chest for a while which was really nice because I was still scared. I started getting loopy pretty fast but I still heard when someone mentioned where the iv equipment was and panicked a little because of that. I remember feeling them take my hand for that but never actually felt anything happen. Just some fear but the gas was v helpful obvi. Someone said they would see me in a little bit, and then I was groggily waking up in recovery.
Recovery was a little rough bc the iv was still there (fully wrapped up so I couldn’t see it though which was rad) but I was still really anxious about it until it was taken out and when it was taken out. For anyone that struggles w this i did not feel them remove it, just the tape. Everything was mentally much easier after that. After a while, going over instructions w parents, a cracker , some ginger ale and some juice, my dad helped me Get dressed and I was helped out to the car in a wheel chair. Ride was smooth bc of remaining numbness and meds except a few Bumps in the road
TOP SURGERY GOTTEN
My post op date was scheduled for Jan 17th and that’s the day I got my drains out followed by several post op check-ins. First week of recovery was miserable but things exponentially approved each day past that, and I went back to school in person two weeks post-op with driving and item-carrying assistance from friends!
Will upload recovery notes at a later date! Feel free to message me with any questions, more than happy to answer and give info! I’m a bit over four months out from surgery now and thriving 🥳

I am NOT OP. OP is u/BlueMillennium with one post being by u/Resource-National
Posts were originally posted to BabyBumps and pregnant
Trigger Warnings: may be distressing to those suffering from infertility, mentions of babyloss/stillbirth, mental health issues
Original Post : Posted on May 2, 2024 (12 days ago) by OOP
I have a weird situation and I need a sanity check. Please tell me I'm not crazy for being concerned and skeptical.
Background: a friend of mine is 34 years old, first time mom, and currently 42.5 weeks pregnant. She says her doctor is not concerned at all. After her 41 week appt, I asked when she would be getting induced, since generally doctors don't let you go past 41 weeks. She said her doctor didn't even talk about induction and baby is healthy, etc. Then a week later, she said her and her doctor briefly talked about induction and because she's dilated, doctor thinks she's in labor and to just come to the birthing center that night to check on progress. She ended up not going in at all because "she's not cramping" and made another appointment with her doctor, which was yesterday. She just let me know that her doctor said they'll induce her on Friday when she's 43 weeks! I'm absolutely baffled. I've given birth 3 times and every single time, they've told me that they rarely let women go past 41 weeks.
I'm starting to think something is going on. This friend is a bit of an odd duck. I have not seen her in person since she told us she was pregnant. She's turned down every offer for baby items, baby shower, walking buddy, etc. She has sent over baby bump pics over the last few months. She has a really small build but does have a small bump I guess. Nothing that would make me think she's 3 weeks overdue.
This is weird, right??
Comments agree that it is indeed strange but a few comments offer potential explanations.
Relevant Comments
mrun1: Midwife here. I think it’s entirely possible your friend and her doctor are going off different due dates. As many others have commented very few providers would be so relaxed about someone going >42 weeks. We often see a due date change after the dating scan but sometimes folks really latch onto their first “due date” that was based only on their last period.
MabelMyerscough: That would also make me very suspicious.. please let me/us know what the 'end result' is! Something sounds indeed shady.. but she's not in the same country as you guys right now? Is she in a country with very weird healthcare?

OOP: She's in the US at a large health system. Her boyfriend lives in Europe. It's a weird situation all around. The boyfriend was supposed to come down for the birth but she's made excuses on why he's not here. At first it was because he only had a week of vacation time and didn't want to get here too early and now it's that he'd rather spend that time with the baby after she's born. This friend was originally going to move to Europe for the birth but that never happened either...

MabelMyerscough: Interesting.. I'm not in the US but from what I read the US is even stricter with inducing early if needed and not past 41 weeks! Where I come from in EU they let you go until 42 weeks if all checkups are good, but not longer than that, ever..
Yeah maybe surrogate or something? I'd still be willing to give her the benefit of the doubt.. has she shared pictures of nursery or something?

OOP: No pictures. We even asked for an ultrasound picture when we got suspicious (we have a friend chat group) but she said she never got copies of the images. It's so shady!! I've offered her my baby stuff that she might need but she doesn't want it for various reasons.
So I'm actually a surrogate and she's well aware of my experience with it. I don't think she could afford it 😕

DeepBackground5803: Is she someone you would have seen in person before pregnancy?
The 43 week induction is concerning to me. Weird especially that her doctor told her to go to the birthing center that night to get checked out, but she didn't because she wasn't cramping.
What do you think is going on? Do you think she secretly has a surrogate? Lying about being pregnant altogether?

OOP: We see each other maybe once or twice a year so not super concerning. She has a boyfriend who she visited overseas, which is supposedly where she got pregnant. I'm thinking there's something shady going on but at some point... There's no baby.. lol

UPDATE: Friend won't be induced until 43 weeks : Posted on May 5, 2024 (10 days ago) by OOP
My friend said her water was starting to leak on Thursday around 2pm. She said her doctor told her not to come in until her contractions are 4 min apart. She was not currently having contractions but more sharp cramps. Friday morning, I checked in on her. She said she's still not having contractions and she still plans to go in that night (last night) around 8pm. I text her around that time to wish her luck and I hope things go well, yadda yadda. She just said "thank you" and nothing else. No updates overnight.
My friend is a nurse at her delivery hospital and called me this morning, asking for an update because she's concerned about her water breaking nearly 48 hours ago and she hasn't had the baby. So, she called her hospital to see if my friend was there and they have no record of her checking in at all. She plans to text her this morning and see if she says she is in the hospital or what. We are all in the same group chat, for reference.
This is all just so crazy. My nurse friend said there's no way her doctor wouldn't have her immediately come in if she's 43 weeks and her water broke. I have no idea what to think. This friend is always really open and texts us all the time with random updates so the radio silence is not normal for her.
Update: friend says she's currently at the hospital and doing well but it's possible she put herself on the privacy list.
{Edited to remove private information}
**I get it. Nurse friend may crossed a line. I have no idea. Just updating with what I was told.
To be continued! 🤷🏼‍♀️
Update 2: it's now been almost 48 hours since she's arrived at the hospital, supposedly. She has said multiple times that she's there and all is well. Zero pictures, updates, or information. She's responding to other messages like normal. It's been 72 hours (I think) since her water broke and she's past 43 weeks now. This friend is one who sends tons of pictures when she's doing anything exciting so... This is definitely not like her. She has volunteered pregnancy related information the last several months.
We don't know how long to let this go. We all agree that we think there is no pregnancy or baby. We've all been friends since elementary school so this is hard for us to accept. There's 3 options. 1) she's pregnant and lied about her due date for whatever reason. 2) she truly believes she's pregnant even though we are pretty sure she hasn't been a doctor. 3) she's just straight up lying. This is hard for us because she hasn't posted on social media so if she wanted the attention, why not post there too? We are thinking that she's lied about previous life events. She was once engaged for years without any wedding or meeting the supposed fiance. I'm sad for her and mad/disappointed she is lying to us.
What do we do??
Update 3: I don't even know how to start. Friend has supposedely been in the hospital for several days at this point. I'm actually in St Lucia right now on vacation so don't have access to our chat group via texts so trying to get updates via FB.
One friend in that text group said she reached out privately and the friend said she had the baby but was too stressed to send pics or updates. So she reached out to the other friend in the chat who said she also reached out to the pregnant friend who said she has NOT had the baby and was starting pitocin that day. So she's now telling people different things
And now, another reddit user reached out via PM. She posted a topic on the Pregnancy subreddit about this exact story. Someone linked her to my posts. I can confirm it is indeed the same person. The main details she has shared are the same with a few things that are off from what I was told.
We are actively trying to get a hold of her parents. They moved recently and no longer have the landline number but we are very concerned.
Edit 4: one friend in our group was able to find pregnant friends home address. This friend is closest to her between all of us. She is going to go over this evening and is prepared to talk to her. We talked to someone we know who is a psychologist and helped us with what to say, how she might react, etc. her parents should be there as well.
Pregnant friend has told one friend that she had the baby yesterday and another friend that she just had the baby an hour ago and is being discharged, which is just impossible. We think she truly believes she is pregnant based off a pregnancy test and it was likely a chemical pregnancy. She never met with a doctor because other tests were negative and I think deep down, she was afraid a doctor would confirm that there is no baby. So, she decided to carry on as if she was pregnant and now she has tricked herself into thinking she is pregnant.
We also found the baby daddy from Europe. He is married. We believe maybe they had an affair. His wife may have already tried talking to pregnant friend and accused her of lying. Or, maybe she found some random guy and made the whole thing up. We have no idea. We are going to urge her to go to a mental health facility in her town.
Relevant Comments:
ruebarbara_: Dude! I had a life long friend do this to me in 2022. Lied the whole way through the pregnancy. Had a baby shower. Bought a fake bump. Boyfriend was excited to be a dad. But none of us actually hung out together. Literally no one knew it was all a lie until she went in for her “induction” and instead she actually fled the state because she was in too deep and didn’t know what to do. Her mom called me and asked what doctor she sees, I gave her the name. She called the clinic and this friend never showed up for her confirmation of pregnancy appointment. Her mom was so embarrassed but also worried. Friend ended up going to inpatient psych for a few days. She’s a pathological liar. We are no longer friends as this wasn’t the first time she had lied about something major and I just don’t have the mental space for that. It was a wild ride that actually caused me a lot of anxiety.

OOP: Oh my God 😲😲 that's what I'm thinking now.. how is she going to get out of the lie??

NoYesterday_6662: I wonder if she feels like she’s “ behind “ in the friend group. So she makes stuff up to feel better. Idk if any of the other friends maybe are married or have kids? So she’s making things up to feel like she’s not “ left out “?

OOP: Yeah she's always wanted kids. There's one other friend who is unmarried, no kids. 🤷🏼‍♀️

bananapajama1: when is the last time you saw her in person? :o is that normal for your friendship?

OOP: It's probably been a year but yeah that's normal. We try to see each other twice a year. I did offer to see her; throw a shower, be her walking buddy, go shopping for baby stuff. She didn't take me up on any of it. Now that is odd. Originally when she told us she was pregnant, she said she was moving to Europe with the boyfriend so it was just so chaotic there for a while, according to her.

Beckella: She’ll claim she had a stillbirth for the attention.

OOP: I think she's convinced herself that she's really pregnant. She did maternity photos and everything but she doesn't really look pregnant. Bloated maybe

JG0923: Is she one to lie about things in general? I had a friend like that who lied about A LOT of things in her life and we didn’t realize it for years and years.

OOP: Looking back at the things she's said over the years, it's possible. She had a fiance for 5 years that I never met. Wondering if that was a lie. Ugh

Resource-National: This is crazy! I “met” a woman on a fertility fb group who is telling me the exact same thing! She lives in Kansas City apparently and has no baby bump and has told me for months she’s been bullied by friends and co workers. She has sent me bump pictures and even photos from her maternity shoot. Literally same story- leaking fluid on Thursday and it’s Sunday and no baby. Today she told me she’s 42 and 6!!! And even said her friends are “attacking” her saying she’s not even pregnant! Really curious if it’s the same woman.

OOP: Wow, same woman. I saw your PM. Holy shit this is wild.

Going past 42 weeks? : Posted on May 6, 2024 (8 days ago) by u/Resource-National
I think I may have befriended a person who is faking their pregnancy. We met on an online fertility community and both got pregnant around the same time. We’ve checked in on each other through our “pregnancies”. She claims to have a very small bump, which I know can happen, and has more or less been bullied by friends and co workers. She’s sent me bump pics throughout her pregnancy and there is no bump.
She’s post term now. Around 40 weeks she claimed to be spotting for a week saying it was her “bloody show”. I tried to keep an open mind because even tho this is my second pregnancy and none of my friends had a bloody show like that, hey, anything is possible right? Now she claims to have been leaking amniotic fluid since Thursday night. She messaged me Friday afternoon and my response was to call her dr or go to labor and delivery to be checked. She claimed that it was confirmed to be amniotic fluid and she was told to go home since she wasn’t having contractions. I found that odd considering she was past the 24 hr mark.
Today she says she’s still leaking fluid and has no contractions. Then I asked her how far long she is and she said 42.6. Prior to this, the first thing she said to me was how she was so upset because her close friends were accusing her of faking a pregnancy. I found that really odd. But after the 42.6 I have to wonder. When I suggested she got to l&d immediately it seemed like groundbreaking news to her (“will they help labor speed up?”). She said she was treated at the er on Friday, which my understanding is that anything pregnancy related always goes through l&d.
I realize not everyone has a provider who educates them or takes it upon themselves to learn the basics of pregnancy. Maybe she’s not the sharpest tool in the shed. But now I’m thinking this person is either fake or totally lying about being pregnant. Either way it’s bizarre!! Does any ob permit pregnancy past 42 weeks in the us?!
Edit:
Wow- the number of comments saying they’ve seen this similar story questioning this woman’s pregnancy is insane. For the record I’ve never told this woman any identifying features other than I live on the west coast. No photos etc. this is through Facebook and my profile is extremely private and we are NOT Facebook friends! Thank you for your concern. My mind def went to all of the horror stories.
Update: It’s safe to say this woman isn’t pregnant. In a shocking turn of events here is a post about the same woman written by her irl friend https://www.reddit.com/BabyBumps/s/LpIboHfJT5
Here is the final Update #2 to this very sad and bizarre saga: https://www.reddit.com/BabyBumps/s/Zm4ARKWcW1
Relevant Comments:
Possible_Library2699: I feel like someone else posted about this same woman!?

ppaulapple: The OP in the other sub just confirmed it’s the same person 2 hours ago 🤯

Final Update: 43 week pregnant friend has admitted to not being pregnant. : Posted on May 7, 2024 (7 days ago) by OOP
A lot has happened in the last 24 hours. Previous posts can be found in my history. I'll link to them later.
Pregnant friend will be called El in this post for simplicity sake.
El has told different friends different stories over the last couple days. She told one friend that she gave birth yesterday, but another friend that she gave birth today and is already home and doing well. The friend closest to her was able to find her home address (she moved recently).
Friend went to the delivery hospital to double check that she wasnt there. They confirmed they had no patient with that name. She called El. She asked El where she was and El said she was leaving the hospital right now. Friend said "well I am here so I'll help you walk out". That's when El broke down and admitted everything after my friend was able to meet her at her house. Here's the gist:
El visited her boyfriend in Europe. A few weeks later, she thought she might be pregnant. She took a test and it had an incredibly faint line. She started posting in pregnancy FB groups asking for confirmation. Then she went to the doctor and asked for an ultrasound. They confirmed that there was no baby. El was convinced they were lying to her. She says she went to another boutique ultrasound place and they did a 3d scan and found a baby and did an entire pregnancy scan. (We don't believe this actually happened). Then El started getting symptoms, her belly starting growing and she fully convinced herself that she was pregnant. She did maternity photos, prepped for a baby and told her workplace and parents. She never went back to the doctor because she was convinced they were all lying to her.
Once she hit "full term", she starting getting anxious. She thought she was cramping, losing her mucus plug, and her water broke. She didn't know what to do because the doctors wouldn't help her. Once she went past 43 weeks, she decided to go to the hospital (yesterday). She showed up with her hospital bags packed and her parents went with her. She told the front desk that she was 43 weeks pregnant and was ready to have her baby. I don't know what all happened here but they basically turned her away and told her she was not pregnant or having a baby. We think her parents started to figure it all out a week or so ago, but didn't know the extent of the lies. They have always let El do whatever she wants and pay for her entire lifestyle. We assume she lied to them about everything.
Friend said El does have a swollen belly that looks like she's 20ish weeks. They talked for a long time and she is grieving this lost pregnancy/baby. She legitimately thought she was going to give birth.
We think she is suffering from a phantom pregnancy. Thank you to the redditor who told me about this. I had never heard of it.
We are all very upset for her and realize that we need to be very careful. We are not going to attack her or confront her as a group. We have a mental health resource ready to help her, if we can delicately get her to agree to go.
This is not how I thought this would all play out. This is all so unbelievable. I appreciate everyone who reached out and commented with words of support. 🩷
Relevant Comments:
linny93: You mentioned in your last post that the “father” is married. Did you get any update on that situation? Did she choose a random European guy and say it was her fiancé?

OOP: She seems to think they are together but his FB says otherwise. He has posts with his wife on trips, etc. we just don't know yet 😕

cherb30: I’m a little confused, forgive me for being skeptical!
Do women who lose a baby 20+ weeks ago still have a noticeable baby bump? What do you mean they “turned her away and told her she was not pregnant”… did they take a pregnancy test or just turn her away? Did any of your friends become concerned that she waited til 43 weeks to go to the doctor to deliver? That is super late. Also I’m really surprised the hospital would have disclosed she was/was not a pregnant patient there. Anyway just my initial questions on this!

OOP: We all started getting very suspicious at 41 weeks when she said her doctors didn't want to induce her and it grew with each week she went past. We were very very concerned, hence my initial post on this subreddit.
I don't know if the hospital did any tests or checked her in any way. I'm shocked they wouldn't have her meet with a social worker or something. She def does not look pregnant enough to give birth. She's a very tiny girl normally so any weight gain in her stomach would be very noticeable. She probably weighs 100-110 pounds. I think it was probably obvious she wasn't ready to give birth and they maybe told her to go to the ER when she wasn't in their patient system.
We are trying to sort between the truth and lies she's spun trying to convince herself and others.

OOP (in response to a deleted comment): She isn't actually pregnant but she truly believes she was pregnant, enough to convince her body that she was. It's called a phantom or hysterical pregnancy. She's having a mental health episode. She's not insane but she does need professional support. She thought she was coming home with a baby. That's what she is grieving. She's wanted to be a mom so badly.
PLEASE DO NOT COMMENT IN ANY LINKED POSTS OR COMMENTS
Marking as concluded due to OOPs friend being confirmed to have not been pregnant.

I'm a 38 y/o female.
I was diagnosed with asthma as a kid.
Current meds Soprobec 200 two puffs AM, two puffs PM, ventolin as needed.
I moved into this flat in 2022, was fine before I moved and to begin with, then I developed worsening asthma symptoms as the months went on. I spent ages trying to fathom out the possible cause. I found no sign of mold or anything like that. then found out tobacco smoke from the man downstairs was coming into mine, it's been so bad on a couple of occasions my bathroom has 'fogged up' with smoke. I have tried everything, including having the council works department out to see if we could seal up any gaps etc, nope, no way of stopping it. He seems to vanish for long periods of time, leaving his flat empty. During these periods, my asthma symptoms vanish completely.
In response to my worsening asthma symptoms, in Jan 2024 the asthma nurses at my surgery decided to increase my ICS dose of Beclomethasone from 400mg a day to 800mg a day. Now I have high functioning Autism on top of all this, I am far from dumb or stupid, but anything to do with numbers seems to go over my head a lot of the time, even though I am better at maths now, amounts of things can still flummox me.
NOBODY told me this was considered a moderate to high dose and I should be carrying a steroid warning card, nobody, not once. I wrongly guessed it was only a few mg more than the soprobec 100 I was on. The Soprobec 100 was two puffs am, two puffs pm.
Now, since I have been on the Soprobec 200 at 800mg a day, I have developed some extreme and very disruptive possible side effects.
All possible other causes of these symptoms just got ruled out in a complete bloodwork which included diabetes, hypercalcemia, thyroid and iron deficiency, which are all possible causes of the things I have listed below, all tests have come back requiring no further action.
These are:
EXTREME, unquenchable thirst. I am drinking easily over four liters of water per day. I am also waking up several times a night for a drink, and if I go out I must carry water with me otherwise the thirst is VERY distressing. I feel dehydrated on a 'cellular level', like it doesn't matter how much I drink, I feel thirsty WHILE drinking water!.
Fatigue so bad I can hardly get up out of my chair most days and I am asleep by 9pm, where before I would like to chill with my dog watching a film or something till about 12pm. I have gone from waking literal miles through local fields and woodland with my dog, to barely being able to take her on the local park which is only across the road. I hardly ever go out, and if I do, I suffer immensely as my muscles start aching. I live upstairs and I am struggling getting up the stairs.
It feels as if I have lost all muscle tone all over my body. I no longer feel safe walking my dog as she is med size mastiff cross who is quite strong, she has almost pulled me over at times and I cannot even lift my kitchen bin bag or the laundry basket, I have NEVER had this problem before.
I have lost my appetite and have to force myself to eat every meal, often taking hours rather than minutes.
Episodes of vaginal thrush, something I have NOT had for YEARS, started when I went on this high dose of ICS.
My once 'perfect' periods are now very heavy and irregular.
I feel more angry than before. I had to seriously check my anger levels in my adult years, and developed a much more patient and stoical outlook to life, which brought my stress levels down massively. Since I went on this inhaler I have been snapping at people again, including my own family :(
Tingling hands. This can come on anytime, never had it before the inhaler.
A terrible hoarse voice and it feels like my voice is getting deeper and I am starting to sound 'male' other people have noticed this too.
Profuse sweating on my hands and feet. My hands DRIP with sweat, to the point I hide them from people. Never happened before this inhaler.
Salt and red meat cravings. I am not a big fan of either, and due to heart problems in the family I keep my salt intake low. Other day I just felt compelled to walk into the local coop and buy pork loins and a pack of beef biltong, things I haven't eaten in many moons. I recall saying to myself 'this is SO out of character for you'.
Episodes of nausea, two episodes of vomiting in the morning over two months (not preggers before anyone asks lol) which were not related to anything I had eaten.
Dizzy spells and almost fainting, usually happens if I push myself to do even basic stuff like household chores, which I usually enjoy doing.
I know these are listed as 'rare' side effects, but unusual thirst, tiredness and weakness is mentioned both in the patient info leaflet with the inhaler, and in various other information regarding side effects, such as this article: https://www.mayoclinic.org/drugs-supplements/corticosteroid-inhalation-route/side-effects/drg-20070533?p=1
I take the inhaler via a spacer, my technique is good, I've been doing this whole asthma game all my life, so I am pretty ofay with it all now lol.
I have had a battle over this inhaler with my GP and other asthma services as well. They just do NOT believe ICS can have systemic side effects, in contradiction to what the drug manufacturers say on the leaflet. I think I am going to have to go back to the GP and stand up for myself, which is not something I am good at at all, and present them with this information leaflet, which actually tells you to consult your doctor if you develop any of them!.
Would it be worth asking to try the same dose, as I do not want to risk withdrawal, I have experienced this before from ICS, but on a different steroid with a different inhaler?.
Is there any more bloodwork I could ask for, perhaps adrenal function or cortisol levels?.
I am at a loss, I need to control my asthma, but I also need to be able to live!.
Thank you for taking time to read this, I hope everyone is well and your asthma leaves you alone to enjoy the summer!. :)

I've been doing a lot of research over the past months band years and it didn't play out like I expected.
8 years ago. Flu causes her sodium levels to bottom out, causing a seizure. After the seizure came a few days of confusion an delirium, including a violent psychotic outburst, for which she was sedated. (She had no prior history of psychosis or mental illness of any kind). After waking up from the sedation, she was her normal self, but had no memory of the previous events.
6 years ago. Another series of seizures. Diagnosed with epilepsy, placed on medication for it.
Four years ago, another violent psychotic episode. Hospitalized. Placed on Seroquel. Diagnosed with dementia but doctor says it is very mild and she can continue doing anything she wants to. She returns to more or less normal although at this time she begins having memory issues and trouble with executive functioning.
Two years ago. Dementia has progressed. No longer drives but can still bo basic household tasks, although with difficulty. Begins sleeping up to 12 hours a day. Has intermittent periods of tremors and involuntary movements, sometimes accompanied by altered states of consciousness. Hallucinations and delusions begin.
Five months ago. Need help with dressing, bathing, etc. Physically very weak. Enters nursing home where she stabilizes for a while then enters a rapid decline. Stops eating and drinking, appears to be in pain. Becomes unresponsive and dies on May 4.
The thing is it seemed to profoundly affect parts of her brain and leave other parts intact. She always remembered family and friends right up to the end. Just a few weeks ago an old friend visited who she hadn't seen in a long time and she immediately recognized her. She only lost her ability to speak in the last week or so of her life. She could still read, and to some extent understand what she was reading, although she may not remember it a few minutes later. Most of all, she continued having occasional really good days until nearly the end, days in which she could carry on a relatively normal conversation. The last day of her life she could look in my eyes and clearly recognize me.
Based on what I had read and conversations with her doctors and nurses I expected she would go on for another several months at leastt. I didn't expect the sudden rapid decline.

18F, 5'7, possible endo, severe menstrual pain and appetite loss. at my limit with my symptoms and have no idea where to go from here.
Around March/April 2023 I began having 2 periods a month, significantly heavier than usual and significantly more painful than I've ever had. This pain has been so significant it will make me curl to the ground when I have cramps, even with alternating 800mg Ibuprofen 2-4x daily and Tylenol.
had been on Hailey Fe 1.5/30 for 4 years, and after discussing with my doctor I then went on Ortho-Cyclen (28). My doctor believed it to be PCOS after my ovaries appearsd to have too many immature follicules (I've had 4 ultrasounds since, all of which state everything looks normal), and stayed the Ortho-Cyclen was more effective for women with PCOS). I had no improvement and continued pain, so we discussed the potential of Endometriosis (I also have cyclic difficulty urinating with my period), and I had the Mirena IUD inserted.
Shortly after insertion (~2 weeks) I began noticing appetitie loss (not nausea, more just a complete lack of desire to eat food, nothing seems appetitizing ever and forcing it down makes me feel sick). Besides this, I've had a great experience with the IUD- no bleeding, and while I still have pain, it's tolerable if I alternate Ibuprofen and Tylenol.
Fast foward to now, the appetite loss has gotten so severe that I'm having difficulty eating more than a few bites of food a day. I haven't lost a TON of weight, but I feel insanely weak. I'm usually very active as I'm a full-time college student and figure skate (usually 1-2 hours, 5-6 days per week, now managing once or twice a weak for maybe 30 minutes). I had a hard time getting in with my regular doctor so I was placed with a different OBGYN, who told me it likely wasn't the IUD and to drink smoothies and protein shakes and cream (which I was already doing, main source of nutrition over the past 3 months). She also did several blood tests, which showed nothing other than a slightly elevated Anion Gap (14 iirc). I was told my next option would be remove the IUD and get a Kyleena placed, although that would carry the risk of returned pain. I was told if that would happen, I could get a laproscopic surgery to check for and remove any endometrial lesions. I weighed around 146 at this appointment at the beginning of March. I began bleeding once a month like a regular period just after this appointment as well, after having no bleeding since the insertion (the strings are still in place).
I had no improvement in symptoms and noticeably lost weight, so I visited another doctor (again, could not get in to see either previous doctor until June). At this visit on April 4th, I weighed 128 (~16 lb weight loss). This doctor was incredibly dismissive (as well as two different nurses saying to my face "they wished they had my problem") ans told me she's never seen a case where someone has had appetite loss from IUD and that it was more likely another medication of mine.
I'm on 300mg Modafinil daily for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome I developed in 2022 after getting Influenza A. I've been on this medication since early August 2023 (1.5 months after getting the IUD placed). While I had no increases appetitie loss after starting it, I had suspected this to be the case, so I paused taking it to find no difference in my symptoms back in January. I told her this and she said while she would take the IUD out, she doesn't believe it to be the cause and provided no further discussion on options.
I found IUD insertion to be rather uncomfortable, but no where near as painful as my menstrual cramps. That said, I really didn't want to remove the Mirena and replace it with a Kyleena unless I needed to. I followed up my primary and decided to take a 3 week break from the Modafinil. I've had absolutely zero improvement in symptoms.
Im about to make my appointment to swap the IUDS, but I'm just so frustrated with the care I've recieved.
I understand my weight loss isn't that significant, but for someone like me who has a very consistent weight and a very active lifestyle, it is for me. I can't function how I need to, and my symptoms are interfering with my life significantly. I still have no idea if its PCOS or endometriosis, but I feel my symptoms better align with endo.
Is there any advice anyone can give me going forward? I'm terrified the pain is going to come back after swapping these IUDs, as the pain is so bad I can't handle it twice a month. I can't continue not eating either.
Thank you to anyone who got this far

Last week my great uncle(73) passed away in the hospital after he'd been in the nursing home for 22 years. When he was 51 he fell down his stairs and the injury resulted in him needing more care and he's been a resident of a care facility basically for as long as I've known him. My mom was his POA and one of the main people in his life that helped him out, almost as if she was his kid rather than just a niece. My great uncle didn't have a partner or kids of his own, so the entire rest of his family was very important to him.
Yesterday my mom was telling the rest of my family about his funeral arrangements that are in the works for his service next week. My mom said that he wanted to be cremated and didn't want any pallbearers. I'm confused because I thought pallbearers refer to caskets, and urn-bearers would be the term used for the people carrying the urn.
Today my mom texted me asking if I would be interested in being an urn bearer. I said "I would, but I don't want to impose on anyone". She said that both of my siblings and 2 of my other cousins would do it. I replied "I thought he didn't want any pallbearers." (trying to use the words that she used from his will). She just replied "urn bearers". I feel like my mom didn't understand what I was getting at, so I asked "Do you think it would be against his wishes if we did that?" She said "Nope, that probably was way before he started going to church again."
I feel like I'm in a moral dilemma of deciding whose side to be on: the dead's choice or the living's. Earlier today, my mom texted me and my siblings asking if we would want to perform any special music at mis memorial service. I said "I feel like if he didn’t specifically ask for that, I wouldn’t want to." No one responded.
To me it seems like my mom is trying to push for her kids to be a part of her uncle's funeral, almost in a way to prove a point that her and her family were a very important staple in his life. I feel like I'm being put in an uncomfortable position to chose. It feels like I'm being asked in multiple different ways to put my affection on display, and I have no idea if any other of my extended family members have been asked to be apart of his service. My great uncle had 5 other siblings, which resulted in 11 nieces/nephews and then 20+ nieces/nephews.
I don't want to be a part of any funeral arrangement that would go against his wishes. I also don't want to create some drama in the family by not being an urn bearer even when I was asked to. I'm leaning towards not being an urn bearer because it's more of a value to me to follow the wishes of a dead relative than to avoid some confrontation/conflict in my family.
So WIYTA for not being an urn bearer at my great uncle's funeral?

Round 1, Pick 32 - Xavier Legette, WR, South Carolina:
NFL: Legette, who had a terrific final season at South Carolina, is physical and a big-time vertical threat. This addition should be a big part of Bryce Young’s development in Year 2.
CBS Sports: B+. They have to get weapons for Bryce Young, so landing him makes sense. He is a player who plays physical and runs better than you think. He’s only done it for one year.
ESPN: Coach Dave Canales said it best: Legette brings versatility. The Panthers absolutely fell in love with Legette's ability to make plays all over the field, from catching passes to jet sweeps to kick returns. That versatility at a skill position is something Bryce Young didn't have last season, so this adds a unique weapon to take pressure off the second-year quarterback. He is also big (6-foot-1, 221 pounds) and fast (4.39 40), unlike any other Carolina receiver. He's a perfect fit for what Canales wants to create with the pass and run games.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Can’t believe he is about to fulfill his dream of being picked in the 2nd round.
Round 2, Pick 46 - Jonathon Brooks, RB, Texas:
NFL: Had Brooks not suffered a torn ACL in November, he might have been a first-round pick. He's a shifty, speedy back who can hit the hole and go, and he should be Carolina's starter before long. I thought they might go center here, but Brooks makes sense for a team that lacked offensive juice.
CBS Sports: B-. Fun, three-down RB without much mileage on his legs. Can win between the tackle or on the perimeter and has feature back size. Elusive but not ridiculously in that regard. Fills a need but maybe a touch early. May not be 100% by September.
ESPN: As much as Canales has said he's excited about backs Chuba Hubbard and Miles Sanders, he obviously believed the running game needed an upgrade. You don't take a back in the second round unless you plan to use him, although Brooks may need time to fully recover from ACL surgery that caused him to miss the final three games last season. He's a playmaker who has a nose for the end zone (10 touchdowns on 187 carries last season), and general manager Dan Morgan said he was looking for guys who can score.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Mixes the milk and cereal in his mouth, one bite and drink at a time.
Round 3, Pick 72 - Trevin Wallace, LB, Kentucky:
NFL: A late addition to my top 100 prospects list, Wallace is a top-tier athlete who finally seemed to find his groove last season -- on special teams but especially on defense. He's capable of covering tight ends and running backs and should impact all four downs, but Wallace is young and could use a redshirt year before he's ready to be featured on defense.
CBS Sports: C. Stocky, springy off-ball LB with speed to the football but one of the least-effective block-defeaters/avoiders I’ve scouted at the position. Not around the football much in coverage but fluid zone drops and has the athleticism to run with TEs. Very good tackler. Just unique strengths/weaknesses.
ESPN: Morgan entered the draft looking for "dawg mentality'' and he got that in Wallace. "Dawg mentality means you don't care if you go hurt somebody,'' Wallace said. "You don't go in there soft. I want you to be scared of me.'' Wallace isn't necessarily a long-term replacement for 30-year-old Shaq Thompson, but his ability to cover the field side-to-side and with speed gives him the potential to do that. Give him a year or so behind Thompson and Josey Jewell and he could prove to be a Day 2 steal.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Enjoys going to the park to make faces at little kids, making them cry.
Round 4, Pick 101 - Ja’Tavion Sanders, TE, Texas:
NFL: Sanders is a fascinating athlete who remains in the developmental stage. He's not a quality blocker yet but has some untapped receiving skill. This is a worthy risk by general manager Dan Morgan and Co. as their hunt for playmakers continues.
CBS Sports: B. Big recruit who produced at Texas and is a smooth mover. Good, not amazing YAC and not a pure speed type. Minimal blocking chops. Reasonable weapon for Bryce Young but lacks burst so will have to get schemed up to get most of his catches in the NFL.
ESPN: Definitely an upgrade at a position that quarterback Young could have used some help from during his rookie season. Canales has spoken highly of Tommy Tremble, but he's not the dynamic pass-catching tight end that Sanders can become. Sanders had 99 receptions in three seasons, tops for a tight end in Texas history. He could pose problems for defenses, like Greg Olsen did during the development of quarterback Cam Newton. This was a no-brainer at this point.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Insists he can distinguish between 50 shades of beige.
Round 5, Pick 157 - Chau Smith-Wade, CB, Washington State:
NFL: Smith-Wade opened eyes with a solid week at the Senior Bowl, consistently showing up around the ball and disrupting passes. His length almost certainly makes him a nickel only on defense, but there's some potential here if CSW develops.
CBS Sports: B+. Agitating CB who played outside but will have a home in the slot in the NFL. Plays more athletically than his testing. Lightning quick feet. Because of his smaller size, he tends to opt for diving tackle attempts more than wrapping up. Speed is a concern but could be masked inside. Up for any challenge.
ESPN: A definite need for depth at a position where injuries have hurt the past few years. Smith-Wade will be a backup and special teamer at best this season. He offers speed (4.54 40) and nose for the football that GM Dan Morgan wants. He's coming off a soft-tissue injury that forced him to miss the final five games and is more of a project at this point. Nickel, where he had two interceptions in the Senior Bowl, may be his future in the NFL.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Thinks being a scrum master sounds kinda cool.
Round 6, Pick 200 - Jaden Crumedy, DT, Mississippi State:
NFL: Being 300-plus pounds and running a sub-5.0 40-yard dash gets you drafted. Crumedy doesn't have sterling production, but his maturity and experience should give him an edge in a fight for a roster spot in Carolina.
CBS Sports: C+. Older, very experienced interior rusher who won from multiple alignments in the SEC and has smooth athletic traits. Production never matched how fluid he is as an athlete and his hands. Needs to have a pass-rush plan more often. Has long stretches of invisibility. Plays hard every snap.
ESPN: This is totally a depth move. His ability to push the pocket is what Carolina will look for out of him in its 3-4 scheme. He likely won't be a threat to start, but he has the flexibility and size (6-4, 301) to play inside or out. Depth behind a solid starting three is key here.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Once put together a 50,000 piece puzzle. It was a picture of a cloud.
Round 7, Pick 240 - Michael Barrett, LB, Michigan:
NFL: Punishing hitter in a sawed-off frame. Barrett's poor length will be tough to overcome, but his forceful play style is inspiring.
CBS Sports: C+. Has a nice blend of traits - - power, burst, coverage skill - - but not always the quickest to read where the ball is going. Quicker than fast and needs to get better beating or avoiding blockers on the way to the football.
ESPN: Barrett is undersized at 5-11, 233 pounds, but he has a nose for the football and brings a physicality to the game that makes up for his lack of size. Barrett should get a chance to contribute immediately, at least on special teams.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Nursed a baby goat back to health after he hit it with a car.

28 M, 6ft and 146lb
Hi guys 👋 I hope you're well, first off apologies in advance for what will be a long winded post but I'll try keep it concise and information based 🙂
I've been suffering for the past year with some very strange symptoms

• Swelling of lips, hands and soles of my feet (allergies have been ruled out I had a test already) it also appears to happen randomly hot days / cold days. When I haven't even eaten anything yet. There's nothing obvious I can link it to
• Extreme fatigue but also complete insomnia at night
• My appetite seems to fluctuate generally I was always a great eater. Dear God I love food haha. Lately though there could be some days that I don't feel hungry at all and have one meal just for the sake of it but food doesn't appeal to me really anymore.
• General feeling that like my body is inflamed hard to describe but I get like dull pains all over the place but mainly my lower back / knees
• Quite severe brain fog and forgetfulness. I will constantly misplace things. Walk into a room and forget what it was I came to do. This one is the main one that gets to me and upsets me because I feel like an old man. At one stage I thought I had dementia or something as ridiculous as that seems but I could watch a movie and then the next day be left scratching my head thinking what was that great thing I watched last night. My partner will talk to me about things and then say "I told you this already an hour ago/last week/yesterday" and I'll have absolutely no recollection of it.
• Very weak. My strength is laughable people have pointed it out to me that a guy my age shouldn't be struggling trying to carry a bag of groceries for example.
• Mood swings I can get quite frustrated for no reason again I'm usually a very laid back person but lately the smallest things are annoying me. Even my partner who is great is irritating the life out of me and I feel so bad because I'm like I have no reason to get frustrated at you.
• 2 weeks ago I also collapsed outside of a pub I had only like a couple of drinks (5 pints of beer over a period of 5 hours) and was not drunk. Started to feel very faint out of the blue and my vision blacked out and I ended up being taken by ambulance to the hospital. My heart rate was all over the place. I was discharged from hospital and was told it was alcohol intoxication which really annoyed me because although technically my blood alcohol levels would've indicated I was "intoxicated" I know for a fact I wasn't I have drank 3 times as much and been absolutely fine. I also walked out of hospital and had a perfectly coherent conversation with the nurses and doctors. I just feel like because of my age and being a young guy that just happened to pass out while out socialising they jumped the gun which has really bothered me.
• I have since had an ECG that came back normal but I was told those things are pretty useless unless you're actually having an episode while it's hooked up to you

I got blood test results back a few days ago and it said I had "raised non specific inflammatory markers" I'm not sure exactly what that means but my doctor told me to just take antihistamines. I'm currently waiting for multiple appointments with cardiology, immunology, respitory and sleep specialists.
Medication wise I'm only on 25mg promethazine (Phenegran) taken every night to help me sleep but it literally does nothing it's currently 1.30 am in Ireland as I write this post lol.
My doctor seems baffled and hasn't really given me any indication of what this might be. Obviously I'll have to just wait for all of these different specialist appointments but I thought maybe I could be pointed in the right direction of some possible causes of this or what might be beneficial to discuss with my doctor. I must admit I'm a terrible patient as when I go in I sometimes struggle to describe exactly how I'm feeling or else I forget to mention specific things due to the brain fog/anxiety I also hate bothering people and hate even asking for help as I feel like I'm being dramatic.
I have shared some pictures of the swelling I get in my lips. I have no pictures of the swelling I get in my hands or the soles of my feet as you can't even see it only feel it.
All of this is having a huge impact on my life I recently left my job because I was just physically and mentally not able to continue with it. It's irritating because I feel like my body is falling apart around me and I think people just think I'm dramatic but in my gut I know there's something going on.
Many thanks and apologies for that novel!! 🙂
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