Happy birthday quotes for mom passed away
Dregslist: Destiny Matchmaking
2013.12.07 01:03 OpTic_Niko Dregslist: Destiny Matchmaking
A matchmaking subreddit for Bungie's /DestinyTheGame.
2015.05.24 20:18 RoyalFino Rabb.it on Reddit
Looking for alternatives to rabb.it? Head over to RabbitRefugees !
2010.09.17 00:37 Media_Offline Eyebleach
What is Eye Bleach? The catch-all community for sharing links which are beautiful, happy, adorable or tastefully sexy. After a long day of seeing what internet anonymity can do to people, you're bound to need some eyebleach.
2024.05.13 23:18 Weathers_Writing I had really bad stomach cramps as a child. They recently started up again.
Content Warning:Mentions of Child Abuse & Gore
They called me a colic baby, meaning I was a seemingly healthy baby that was distressed for an unknown reason. The fits of crying mostly dissipated by six months, but they'd crop up every now and then into toddler-hood. When I became capable of babbling a few words, I would summarize my pain in a few words: belly hurt. Belly HURT!
My parents didn't have much money, but they took me to the doctor for a checkup anyway. After running a physical exam and blood test, they determined that I was merely an excessively gassy little girl and should probably eat a more gut-friendly diet. They also prescribed some medicine which would eliminate the gas and relieve my pain.
It was from that moment on that my parents gave me the nickname "Gas Girl" (which I despised). The name stuck for several years, and anytime I'd get a little stomach ache my mom or dad would say, "uh, oh. It's not Gas Girl returning, is it?" I'd glare at them with my arms folded and pout, saying, "I'm not Gas Girl. I'm Wonder Girl!" My parents would share a look, then burst out laughing. Just as I was about to shout a retort, my dad would open up his arms and bend down in that familiar pose which signaled liftoff, and all my childish rage detached like a racing sticker as I leaped into my dad's arms and he flew me around the living room shouting "Who is it? It's Wonder-girl! Here to save the day from Gas Girl!"
Anyway, just as the nickname wore off, the pain returned. I was about 7 or 8 when I had my first big episode. I was in second grade, and the class was cutting out shapes. The pain came on so suddenly I remember lurching back and falling out of my seat. The next few hours were a blur of adults: my teacher, the nurses, the principal, my parents. I remember how cold and alone I felt despite being surrounded by grown ups, and my stomach hurt so much I was crying pretty much nonstop.
My dad bought a bunch of OTC medicine to try and settle what he thought was a really bad gas episode. My mom laid at the side of my bed and did bicycles in the air with me. Hours passed in pain as my adolescent imagination conjured up images of an evil little elf blowing thousands of bubbles in my belly. I consciously pictured myself popping them, but every time I did, more were blown. My dad scheduled a doctor's appointment for the next morning, and my mom stayed at my side until I was able to fall asleep sometime late in the night.
I dreamed vividly a horrific nightmare. I was strapped to a black, metal box. A surgeon donning blue scrubs with white gloves and a mask entered the space in my peripheral vision. The air was cold but crisp, as if every bit of dust had been scrubbed out of existence. I could feel my breathing, my heartbeat, even my skin. The doctor stepped forward and I could see the distortion of a smirk in the folds of his mask. I expected him to say something, to tell me what he wanted, but instead he lifted my shirt so my belly was exposed. "It's cold", I said in a mumbly voice. He lifted his hand in the air, and I saw behind it off in the back of the room was what looked like the glass wall of an aquarium. I was confused for a second, but only a second. The surgeon plunged his hand into my stomach like a spear, splitting through the flesh as if it were the skin of a ripe fruit. The previously silent man began to cackle like a maniacal villain as I nearly passed out from the pain. I felt his fingers swimming through my guts like parasitic worms. My body shook as cold sweat and blood began to ooze from my pores. I wanted to scream but I couldn't make a sound. I could only lay there, paralyzed, as the evil doctor explored my insides.
Somehow I lost consciousness in the dream, but when I woke up, the memory came flooding back, and I screamed with all the force of a thunderstorm. My parents skipped the appointment and rushed me to immediate care, but by the time we arrived, the pain was gone. I explained my dream to the doctor, but he said it was normal to dream up reasons for the pain. They recommended a CT scan to screen out the possibility of an ulcer or internal bleeding. Despite my parents' scarce savings, they agreed to run the test. However, something deeply entrenched in my mind thought of the dream with the surgeon and I protested. "I don't want a test!" I screamed. "But, honey, how are we going to know what's wrong?" replied my mom. "Nothing's wrong now. I don't want a test."
Looking back now on my persistence, it should have been obvious that there was something wrong with me, but my parents, who were thinking of their finances, allowed themselves to acquiesce to my demands. The pain would continue into and throughout my teenage years, and the one benefit that I can credit to it was that it taught me how to endure pain and hide it well before puberty started. Compared to my childhood cramps, period cramps were around a B+. Very bad, but not end of the world bad. However, they'd stick around more reliably, and eventually the two began to combine until I could no longer discern between them. Occasionally I would have a nightmare and wake up with a pain that was a little higher in my stomach, almost approaching my chest, but it would always disappear by breakfast time, and the chaos of a teenage girl's life would once again reassert itself in the form of an outfit that didn't look quite right or the memory of every word of a conversation with a guy I liked or how my teacher was out to get me. Basically, I had become normal.
And then two weeks after I turned 16, my dad passed away from heart failure. Apparently the stress from a paycheck-to-paycheck life in sales added onto a bad diet and a penchant for alcohol was a recipe for disaster. He was only 49. I was crushed.
The weeks and months following his funeral were filled with teenage anger and resentment. I directed most of it at my mom, who I held accountable for not being strong enough to step up and help with the bills. One day, when I was searching the drug cabinet for some painkillers to deal with some bad cramping, I noticed a new prescription for a drug with a really long name. I looked it up. It was an antidepressant. From that moment on I stopped giving my mom shit, but I grew a bit distant from her. I started spending a lot more time with my friends. I became reckless, adopting a drinking habit and unsafe sex practices. I smoked a bit but I didn't really like it. I guess I was just trying to find a way to move on, as naive as it was.
Fast forward to my present situation, and I'm a college student. A junior to be exact. I ended up scrounging up enough money from working two restaurant jobs to see a therapist on my own dime, and managed to make peace with my mom before leaving. We both talked out all of our trauma and cried together, and from that moment on, I haven't had a drink. About six months ago I got on the pill. I was starting to see one guy consistently and I wanted to be safe, but also I wanted to know what it felt like to not have stomach cramps anymore. It was freeing. I remembered my dad lifting me up into the air as a child, and I figured it kinda felt like that. I still cry thinking about him, although I don't let anyone see.
Anyway, about a week ago I started having really bad pain again, but this time it was in my chest. I would wake up in my apartment (I share a 3-bedroom with some friends from the college) with heart palpitations. My heart felt like a snake had wrapped around it and was trying to choke it out. The pressure would give way to a burst of fast ba-dum's, then settle, then start again. I remembered my dad's prognosis and started to get really scared, so I scheduled an appointment with the on-campus doctor for the next day through the online health platform.
They told me that chest pain is no joke and scheduled to have me scanned at a nearby hospital. This was four days ago. My boyfriend, Kevin, drove me there even though I said I'd be fine going alone. I think I already knew our relationship wasn't going to work out long term, so I was kind of checked out. I felt bad about it though because Kev is actually a really good person, but our personalities just don't match. He's very introverted and doesn't like to go out, whereas I thrive in group settings. Anyway, he drove me and I ended up getting an X-ray. The doc came in to share the results and I was immediately put off by the dubious expression on his face.
"What do you mean the images are blurry?" I asked.
"Well, it's just… that. They're blurry. It's very unusual for this to happen unless you have a pacemaker or some other device implanted. Do you know if you have something like that?"
"No, never," I said with a quaver in my voice. For some reason I thought back on my childhood dream with the surgeon and felt the urge to vomit.
"Well, let's run a CT scan and see if we can make anything out." He soothed.
Normally the CT and MRI dock was booked for a week out but the doctor happened to have an open space for me that same morning, so I waited about an hour and then got in the big tube machine that took pictures of my chest and abdomen. He said he should have the results by Thursday. That was Yesterday.
I was driving onto campus for my 9AM class when I got the call.
"Hello, this is Dr. **** calling for Josie **** ." (names redacted for privacy reasons)
"Oh, yes, this is Josie," I said and fit the phone between my shoulder and ear as I tried to find a comfortable posture."
"Yes, hello," the male doctor said in grave way which made me feel like this wasn't going to be a short call. "I wanted to see if you were available to come in today for some more tests."
"More tests?" I asked. "What about the first ones?" Images of blocked heart valves and cancer presented themselves on my mental screen.
"Yes, well, I wanted to discuss the results with you in person. There was a bit of a … well, an inconsistency, and I didn't want to upset you—"
"Upset me!?" I blurted, my free hand flying out over the steering wheel, swerving my car toward the curb. I corrected, then lowered my voice, "sorry, I don't mean to be …" be, what? This is completely absurd. "Could you at least give me some indication of what's wrong with me? I'm just kind of panicking here."
The doctor was quiet for a moment, then returned. "Sorry, Josie, I didn't mean to spook you. Both the X-ray scan and CT scan are picking up interference which is unusual. It's possible it's just a flaw on our end, so that's why we wanted you to come back in—to do an MRI and really verify what the issue is. This one would be free of charge and we'd get you results same-day as we feel bad about the issues with the machinery. Do you think that would be possible?"
I took a deep breath. I still felt uneasy, but at least now there was some kind of explanation I could lean on. "Okay, yeah, I can come in. I have class until 9:50AM, but I can drive over after and be there around 10:15, 10:20-ish. Would that work?"
"That would work great. We'll see you then."
I spent the whole of my communications class thinking about what could be wrong with me, doodling my ideas down on a notebook. Heart disease. Cancer. Some kind of peptic ulcer. Maybe it was the pill? The drinking? Was this some kind of cosmic retribution? I didn't know.
An hour later I was back at the hospital. I expected to be ushered into the MRI prep room, but instead I found myself in one of the normal patient rooms, sitting upright on a bed. The nurse did the preliminary height and weight measurements and medical history. I asked about the MRI, but all she said was that the doctor will discuss that with me. Before she left, she handed me an assessment to fill out. It seemed to be a list of questions about the medical history of my family, specifically about our mental health. Does your family have a history of Schizophrenia? Have there been any instances of domestic abuse? Did you have vivid nightmares as a child? Etc. I marked the boxes, then set the clipboard down.
At last I heard the fated knock on the door, and my doctor came in holding an Ipad. The door was only open for maybe a couple seconds, but I could see multiple nurses and technicians peeking their heads in my direction, as if they were trying to catch a glimpse of me. That can't be good.
"Hello, Josie," the doctor said and clicked on the little TV screen. He didn't even look at me. I could see dried sweat along his hairline.
"What's happening? I thought I was going to get an MRI…"
"Well, actually we aren't sure if that's the best course of action." the doctor said as he clicked the screen and pulled up a series of images.
"Can you look at me, please?" I snapped.
The doctor raised his head and tilted it in my direction. His mouth was agape, his eyes wide as if only realizing I was here at that moment. "I'm sorry, Josie." He took a deep breath, preparing some kind of canned presentation, then let it out and said, "It's just easier if I show you." He pulled up the first global image from what I presume was my CT scan. It was a front-shot. I could see my organs as little geometric shapes and—
"Wait, what is that?" I asked, pointing at the screen.
"That—is the problem."
I spent the next minute just staring at it. Somehow, in between all of the organs, there was some kind of cylindrical mass—I thought it was my spine at first but quickly realized it was too wide and there weren't any vertebrae—and at the head of the mass was, very clearly, a hand.
"What the fuck is that" I said in a tone that was at once forceful and pointed.
"It appears," the doctor started, looking away again. "It appears that there is a mechanical hand in your chest cavity. It's attached to a piece of a forearm that begins at your stomach, here," he pointed, "and continues up until, well, it appears to be holding your heart."
Ten seconds passed in silence. Then I was hit with the equivalent of the laughing gas they give you at the Dentist's office. All the blood in my body surged to my forehead and I felt light as the very thin hospital air. "Hahaha!!! You expect me to believe that? What kind of fucking clown-show hospital is this? Am I at the circus?' I stood up and started toward the door. The doctor body blocked me.
"Please, Josie, that isn't it."
"Oh?" I said sarcastically. "Please, do tell."
"Could you have—oh, okay, okay,, let me explain."
I stood there with my arms folded, unrelenting.
"When we first had you do the X-ray there was a big blur. It was clear that something was blocking us from seeing the image. The CT scan was able to take some actual pictures of it. I know it seems, well, unusual—"
"Wait, what the hell is that?" I asked, gesturing toward the clipboard.
"What?" The doctor looked disoriented.
"Those questions. Are you trying to insinuate that my mom and dad implanted some kind of mechanical hand in my body?"
"No," the doctor raised his hands. "We were just trying to gather some more information… Josie," the doctor said as I once again headed for the door handle. "Please, there's more. From the blood test we conducted it seems that you're pregnant."
I was so done. "I'm on the pill, asshole." I sneered and swung the door open, ignoring the sets of eyes trained on me as I scurried to the end of the hall, ran outside, and climbed into my car. I expected to see a bunch of people in white coats running after me, but there was no one. I started the car as tears began to stream from my eyes. Fuck them, I thought and sped out of the parking lot.
I couldn't return to my apartment. I ended up driving for hours, working my way back to my hometown. I spent a long time thinking about all the things I had experienced growing up. The stomach pain, slowly working its way up to my chest. The vivid dream of the surgeon feeling around my guts. Was it really that crazy to think my body was trying to tell me something? Why had I decided against having a CT scan all those years ago? Why now? I didn't—couldn't believe what was happening to me. But was that just because I didn't want to believe it?
And then there was the pregnancy. I was definitely on the pill. I knew it wasn't Kev's, or at least I was pretty sure it wasn't. We haven't been having sex for a little over a month now. But did that mean that something else didn't impregnate me? My paranoia was at its peak. I considered the possibility that maybe it was me that was Schizophrenic. None of this made any sense. I wanted my dad. I missed him. I considered going to see my mom, but despite making up with her, I still didn't feel close enough to her to own up to everything. I wanted to be alone—needed to be alone.
I ended up getting a Motel about 10 minutes away from my house. It was around 1AM when I finally opened the door to my room and laid down on the bed. After hours of thinking, a single thought occurred to me like a kind of defense mechanism: if I really am pregnant, I'm not keeping the baby. I want it out.
Just as I was drifting off to sleep, I heard the notification sound go off on my phone, which was odd since I was sure I had set it to vibrate. I turned and grabbed it, unplugging it from its charging dock. I had received a text message from an unknown, 5-digit number: 66669. This is what it said.
66669: If you terminate my baby, I will crush your heart.
***
I haven't been able to sleep since. It's now 6AM and I've drafted this as a cry for help. Please, let me know what you think I should do. I'm too "in it" to see the details clearly. I feel alone and scared and paranoid. Someone or something is watching me. Maybe it has been my whole life.
submitted by Weathers_Writing to nosleep [link] [comments]
They called me a colic baby, meaning I was a seemingly healthy baby that was distressed for an unknown reason. The fits of crying mostly dissipated by six months, but they'd crop up every now and then into toddler-hood. When I became capable of babbling a few words, I would summarize my pain in a few words: belly hurt. Belly HURT!
My parents didn't have much money, but they took me to the doctor for a checkup anyway. After running a physical exam and blood test, they determined that I was merely an excessively gassy little girl and should probably eat a more gut-friendly diet. They also prescribed some medicine which would eliminate the gas and relieve my pain.
It was from that moment on that my parents gave me the nickname "Gas Girl" (which I despised). The name stuck for several years, and anytime I'd get a little stomach ache my mom or dad would say, "uh, oh. It's not Gas Girl returning, is it?" I'd glare at them with my arms folded and pout, saying, "I'm not Gas Girl. I'm Wonder Girl!" My parents would share a look, then burst out laughing. Just as I was about to shout a retort, my dad would open up his arms and bend down in that familiar pose which signaled liftoff, and all my childish rage detached like a racing sticker as I leaped into my dad's arms and he flew me around the living room shouting "Who is it? It's Wonder-girl! Here to save the day from Gas Girl!"
Anyway, just as the nickname wore off, the pain returned. I was about 7 or 8 when I had my first big episode. I was in second grade, and the class was cutting out shapes. The pain came on so suddenly I remember lurching back and falling out of my seat. The next few hours were a blur of adults: my teacher, the nurses, the principal, my parents. I remember how cold and alone I felt despite being surrounded by grown ups, and my stomach hurt so much I was crying pretty much nonstop.
My dad bought a bunch of OTC medicine to try and settle what he thought was a really bad gas episode. My mom laid at the side of my bed and did bicycles in the air with me. Hours passed in pain as my adolescent imagination conjured up images of an evil little elf blowing thousands of bubbles in my belly. I consciously pictured myself popping them, but every time I did, more were blown. My dad scheduled a doctor's appointment for the next morning, and my mom stayed at my side until I was able to fall asleep sometime late in the night.
I dreamed vividly a horrific nightmare. I was strapped to a black, metal box. A surgeon donning blue scrubs with white gloves and a mask entered the space in my peripheral vision. The air was cold but crisp, as if every bit of dust had been scrubbed out of existence. I could feel my breathing, my heartbeat, even my skin. The doctor stepped forward and I could see the distortion of a smirk in the folds of his mask. I expected him to say something, to tell me what he wanted, but instead he lifted my shirt so my belly was exposed. "It's cold", I said in a mumbly voice. He lifted his hand in the air, and I saw behind it off in the back of the room was what looked like the glass wall of an aquarium. I was confused for a second, but only a second. The surgeon plunged his hand into my stomach like a spear, splitting through the flesh as if it were the skin of a ripe fruit. The previously silent man began to cackle like a maniacal villain as I nearly passed out from the pain. I felt his fingers swimming through my guts like parasitic worms. My body shook as cold sweat and blood began to ooze from my pores. I wanted to scream but I couldn't make a sound. I could only lay there, paralyzed, as the evil doctor explored my insides.
Somehow I lost consciousness in the dream, but when I woke up, the memory came flooding back, and I screamed with all the force of a thunderstorm. My parents skipped the appointment and rushed me to immediate care, but by the time we arrived, the pain was gone. I explained my dream to the doctor, but he said it was normal to dream up reasons for the pain. They recommended a CT scan to screen out the possibility of an ulcer or internal bleeding. Despite my parents' scarce savings, they agreed to run the test. However, something deeply entrenched in my mind thought of the dream with the surgeon and I protested. "I don't want a test!" I screamed. "But, honey, how are we going to know what's wrong?" replied my mom. "Nothing's wrong now. I don't want a test."
Looking back now on my persistence, it should have been obvious that there was something wrong with me, but my parents, who were thinking of their finances, allowed themselves to acquiesce to my demands. The pain would continue into and throughout my teenage years, and the one benefit that I can credit to it was that it taught me how to endure pain and hide it well before puberty started. Compared to my childhood cramps, period cramps were around a B+. Very bad, but not end of the world bad. However, they'd stick around more reliably, and eventually the two began to combine until I could no longer discern between them. Occasionally I would have a nightmare and wake up with a pain that was a little higher in my stomach, almost approaching my chest, but it would always disappear by breakfast time, and the chaos of a teenage girl's life would once again reassert itself in the form of an outfit that didn't look quite right or the memory of every word of a conversation with a guy I liked or how my teacher was out to get me. Basically, I had become normal.
And then two weeks after I turned 16, my dad passed away from heart failure. Apparently the stress from a paycheck-to-paycheck life in sales added onto a bad diet and a penchant for alcohol was a recipe for disaster. He was only 49. I was crushed.
The weeks and months following his funeral were filled with teenage anger and resentment. I directed most of it at my mom, who I held accountable for not being strong enough to step up and help with the bills. One day, when I was searching the drug cabinet for some painkillers to deal with some bad cramping, I noticed a new prescription for a drug with a really long name. I looked it up. It was an antidepressant. From that moment on I stopped giving my mom shit, but I grew a bit distant from her. I started spending a lot more time with my friends. I became reckless, adopting a drinking habit and unsafe sex practices. I smoked a bit but I didn't really like it. I guess I was just trying to find a way to move on, as naive as it was.
Fast forward to my present situation, and I'm a college student. A junior to be exact. I ended up scrounging up enough money from working two restaurant jobs to see a therapist on my own dime, and managed to make peace with my mom before leaving. We both talked out all of our trauma and cried together, and from that moment on, I haven't had a drink. About six months ago I got on the pill. I was starting to see one guy consistently and I wanted to be safe, but also I wanted to know what it felt like to not have stomach cramps anymore. It was freeing. I remembered my dad lifting me up into the air as a child, and I figured it kinda felt like that. I still cry thinking about him, although I don't let anyone see.
Anyway, about a week ago I started having really bad pain again, but this time it was in my chest. I would wake up in my apartment (I share a 3-bedroom with some friends from the college) with heart palpitations. My heart felt like a snake had wrapped around it and was trying to choke it out. The pressure would give way to a burst of fast ba-dum's, then settle, then start again. I remembered my dad's prognosis and started to get really scared, so I scheduled an appointment with the on-campus doctor for the next day through the online health platform.
They told me that chest pain is no joke and scheduled to have me scanned at a nearby hospital. This was four days ago. My boyfriend, Kevin, drove me there even though I said I'd be fine going alone. I think I already knew our relationship wasn't going to work out long term, so I was kind of checked out. I felt bad about it though because Kev is actually a really good person, but our personalities just don't match. He's very introverted and doesn't like to go out, whereas I thrive in group settings. Anyway, he drove me and I ended up getting an X-ray. The doc came in to share the results and I was immediately put off by the dubious expression on his face.
"What do you mean the images are blurry?" I asked.
"Well, it's just… that. They're blurry. It's very unusual for this to happen unless you have a pacemaker or some other device implanted. Do you know if you have something like that?"
"No, never," I said with a quaver in my voice. For some reason I thought back on my childhood dream with the surgeon and felt the urge to vomit.
"Well, let's run a CT scan and see if we can make anything out." He soothed.
Normally the CT and MRI dock was booked for a week out but the doctor happened to have an open space for me that same morning, so I waited about an hour and then got in the big tube machine that took pictures of my chest and abdomen. He said he should have the results by Thursday. That was Yesterday.
I was driving onto campus for my 9AM class when I got the call.
"Hello, this is Dr. **** calling for Josie **** ." (names redacted for privacy reasons)
"Oh, yes, this is Josie," I said and fit the phone between my shoulder and ear as I tried to find a comfortable posture."
"Yes, hello," the male doctor said in grave way which made me feel like this wasn't going to be a short call. "I wanted to see if you were available to come in today for some more tests."
"More tests?" I asked. "What about the first ones?" Images of blocked heart valves and cancer presented themselves on my mental screen.
"Yes, well, I wanted to discuss the results with you in person. There was a bit of a … well, an inconsistency, and I didn't want to upset you—"
"Upset me!?" I blurted, my free hand flying out over the steering wheel, swerving my car toward the curb. I corrected, then lowered my voice, "sorry, I don't mean to be …" be, what? This is completely absurd. "Could you at least give me some indication of what's wrong with me? I'm just kind of panicking here."
The doctor was quiet for a moment, then returned. "Sorry, Josie, I didn't mean to spook you. Both the X-ray scan and CT scan are picking up interference which is unusual. It's possible it's just a flaw on our end, so that's why we wanted you to come back in—to do an MRI and really verify what the issue is. This one would be free of charge and we'd get you results same-day as we feel bad about the issues with the machinery. Do you think that would be possible?"
I took a deep breath. I still felt uneasy, but at least now there was some kind of explanation I could lean on. "Okay, yeah, I can come in. I have class until 9:50AM, but I can drive over after and be there around 10:15, 10:20-ish. Would that work?"
"That would work great. We'll see you then."
I spent the whole of my communications class thinking about what could be wrong with me, doodling my ideas down on a notebook. Heart disease. Cancer. Some kind of peptic ulcer. Maybe it was the pill? The drinking? Was this some kind of cosmic retribution? I didn't know.
An hour later I was back at the hospital. I expected to be ushered into the MRI prep room, but instead I found myself in one of the normal patient rooms, sitting upright on a bed. The nurse did the preliminary height and weight measurements and medical history. I asked about the MRI, but all she said was that the doctor will discuss that with me. Before she left, she handed me an assessment to fill out. It seemed to be a list of questions about the medical history of my family, specifically about our mental health. Does your family have a history of Schizophrenia? Have there been any instances of domestic abuse? Did you have vivid nightmares as a child? Etc. I marked the boxes, then set the clipboard down.
At last I heard the fated knock on the door, and my doctor came in holding an Ipad. The door was only open for maybe a couple seconds, but I could see multiple nurses and technicians peeking their heads in my direction, as if they were trying to catch a glimpse of me. That can't be good.
"Hello, Josie," the doctor said and clicked on the little TV screen. He didn't even look at me. I could see dried sweat along his hairline.
"What's happening? I thought I was going to get an MRI…"
"Well, actually we aren't sure if that's the best course of action." the doctor said as he clicked the screen and pulled up a series of images.
"Can you look at me, please?" I snapped.
The doctor raised his head and tilted it in my direction. His mouth was agape, his eyes wide as if only realizing I was here at that moment. "I'm sorry, Josie." He took a deep breath, preparing some kind of canned presentation, then let it out and said, "It's just easier if I show you." He pulled up the first global image from what I presume was my CT scan. It was a front-shot. I could see my organs as little geometric shapes and—
"Wait, what is that?" I asked, pointing at the screen.
"That—is the problem."
I spent the next minute just staring at it. Somehow, in between all of the organs, there was some kind of cylindrical mass—I thought it was my spine at first but quickly realized it was too wide and there weren't any vertebrae—and at the head of the mass was, very clearly, a hand.
"What the fuck is that" I said in a tone that was at once forceful and pointed.
"It appears," the doctor started, looking away again. "It appears that there is a mechanical hand in your chest cavity. It's attached to a piece of a forearm that begins at your stomach, here," he pointed, "and continues up until, well, it appears to be holding your heart."
Ten seconds passed in silence. Then I was hit with the equivalent of the laughing gas they give you at the Dentist's office. All the blood in my body surged to my forehead and I felt light as the very thin hospital air. "Hahaha!!! You expect me to believe that? What kind of fucking clown-show hospital is this? Am I at the circus?' I stood up and started toward the door. The doctor body blocked me.
"Please, Josie, that isn't it."
"Oh?" I said sarcastically. "Please, do tell."
"Could you have—oh, okay, okay,, let me explain."
I stood there with my arms folded, unrelenting.
"When we first had you do the X-ray there was a big blur. It was clear that something was blocking us from seeing the image. The CT scan was able to take some actual pictures of it. I know it seems, well, unusual—"
"Wait, what the hell is that?" I asked, gesturing toward the clipboard.
"What?" The doctor looked disoriented.
"Those questions. Are you trying to insinuate that my mom and dad implanted some kind of mechanical hand in my body?"
"No," the doctor raised his hands. "We were just trying to gather some more information… Josie," the doctor said as I once again headed for the door handle. "Please, there's more. From the blood test we conducted it seems that you're pregnant."
I was so done. "I'm on the pill, asshole." I sneered and swung the door open, ignoring the sets of eyes trained on me as I scurried to the end of the hall, ran outside, and climbed into my car. I expected to see a bunch of people in white coats running after me, but there was no one. I started the car as tears began to stream from my eyes. Fuck them, I thought and sped out of the parking lot.
I couldn't return to my apartment. I ended up driving for hours, working my way back to my hometown. I spent a long time thinking about all the things I had experienced growing up. The stomach pain, slowly working its way up to my chest. The vivid dream of the surgeon feeling around my guts. Was it really that crazy to think my body was trying to tell me something? Why had I decided against having a CT scan all those years ago? Why now? I didn't—couldn't believe what was happening to me. But was that just because I didn't want to believe it?
And then there was the pregnancy. I was definitely on the pill. I knew it wasn't Kev's, or at least I was pretty sure it wasn't. We haven't been having sex for a little over a month now. But did that mean that something else didn't impregnate me? My paranoia was at its peak. I considered the possibility that maybe it was me that was Schizophrenic. None of this made any sense. I wanted my dad. I missed him. I considered going to see my mom, but despite making up with her, I still didn't feel close enough to her to own up to everything. I wanted to be alone—needed to be alone.
I ended up getting a Motel about 10 minutes away from my house. It was around 1AM when I finally opened the door to my room and laid down on the bed. After hours of thinking, a single thought occurred to me like a kind of defense mechanism: if I really am pregnant, I'm not keeping the baby. I want it out.
Just as I was drifting off to sleep, I heard the notification sound go off on my phone, which was odd since I was sure I had set it to vibrate. I turned and grabbed it, unplugging it from its charging dock. I had received a text message from an unknown, 5-digit number: 66669. This is what it said.
66669: If you terminate my baby, I will crush your heart.
***
I haven't been able to sleep since. It's now 6AM and I've drafted this as a cry for help. Please, let me know what you think I should do. I'm too "in it" to see the details clearly. I feel alone and scared and paranoid. Someone or something is watching me. Maybe it has been my whole life.
2024.05.13 23:17 AwareAd2838 It's my birthday today and I am all alone...
As I am writing this, I am about to turn 19 in a few minutes and sobbing while writing this message. I just wish I had some friends whom I could talk to everyday.
I am an out of state student in US and am far away from my family with not a lot of friends. My parents just called me and wished me happy birthday and that's all. Well it's okay, but I wish I just had friends whom I could celebrate my 19th birthday with.
I am not sure what's my problem, I dress well, go to gym, keep myself fit and I don't think I am ugly. I think my height is good too.
I think the reason I end up not having any friends is being an introvert. I always end up being the boring one and people are never interested in me. I wish I could improve this and I promise I am really working on this.
I always end up being all alone and life sucks ig. I am sorry for venting and thank you so much for reading all this.
Hope you have a great day!
submitted by AwareAd2838 to Needafriend [link] [comments]
I am an out of state student in US and am far away from my family with not a lot of friends. My parents just called me and wished me happy birthday and that's all. Well it's okay, but I wish I just had friends whom I could celebrate my 19th birthday with.
I am not sure what's my problem, I dress well, go to gym, keep myself fit and I don't think I am ugly. I think my height is good too.
I think the reason I end up not having any friends is being an introvert. I always end up being the boring one and people are never interested in me. I wish I could improve this and I promise I am really working on this.
I always end up being all alone and life sucks ig. I am sorry for venting and thank you so much for reading all this.
Hope you have a great day!
2024.05.13 23:11 verminbby My Story: How I watched my ex and love of my life loose his mind to this drug
Hey people. I wanted to share my long ass story about how nitrous used to be one of my most favorite things in the world and now my relationship with it is complicated and twisted.
A lot of this will tackle interpersonal relationship dynamics, but I’m trying to illustrate to the reader the progression of how this drug took my ex’s mind. This is more of a thorough essay about my experience than a rant. When I was going through what I went through at the time, I wished there was a story like this out there to help me know better and understand. This is how I watched the love of my life melt away his brain on this drug.
I will try and keep this brief, but it probably won't be. I wish to convey the addictiveness this drug can have and the toll it can take on your mind and body. In the summer of 2022 I met my then bf who introduced me to the rave scene and drug scene he was a part of. He really only used K and Nitrous (which I will refer to as N going forward). He told me about his 1.5 years of being addicted to K, but did not inform me of his also 1.5 years (at the time) addiction to N. He told me after meeting me he didn’t want to abuse K anymore so as far as I knew when we started dating he got better about that.
It all started very early in the relationship. We went to a weekend festival together and both found doing N together was so fun. We continued on using and abusing N every weekend, and sometimes many weekdays. Probably going through 6 or 8+ tanks a week, this went on for like 3 months. Sadly, I do look back on those days fondly, despite what would happen later down the line. We had so much fun together and yes sadly it bonded us in this weird way. Using it causes you to feel more open and positive in the beginning, and we had so many heartfelt and deep conversations. And it felt like a little special world we could go into together.
At the time I had no clue how much those small-medium sized tanks cost ($65 and up for just one where we live). And he never told me how much they cost, and didn’t ask me to chip in, so I had no idea he was throwing himself into financial ruin buying them all the time. Looking back I have no idea why I didn’t ask, I just figured they were only $25 or something, or his friend was giving them to him, and I was aware it was probably a poor financial decision, but figured he could bounce back after the summer. You have to understand I thought I had him figured out, but I didn’t really know him that well at this point, or know about the drug scene at all. Before this I really only drank and smoked weed with the occasional cid or shrooms trip.
Three months into us dating and abusing N we come to the conclusion we just need to stop and take a break from N as this had all become quite excessive. Still he doesn’t explain to me how much debt he is in from buying all of those tanks over the summer. Two months into the break and he’s starting to crack, asking for me to be okay with us using it regularly. I tell him that I think it’s okay for us to just do it once and awhile. It was hard to not cave in because truthfully I missed it as well, I myself was starting to feel the addictiveness of this drug, so I reserved it so that I only ever did it with him. We go back to doing it occasionally on the weekends. Over the span of 1 month my bf started to constantly complain of having nerve issues, his feet and legs and hands were numb, I also noticed that he seemed really depressed. This is when he started to experience the vitamin B deficiency, although both me and him didn’t realize this at the time.
Around this time is when he finally and unceremoniously reveals to me how much these things actually cost. This is the tricky aspect of his personality I would go on to experience more of. It was clear he was resentful towards me, that I had no idea how much money he was spending, but the reality is if I had known how much those things cost I would have ended it a lot sooner. I didn’t even understand how he had the ability to spend so much money, I don’t even want to do the math. I would find out later he would just take out credit cards and max them out. In addition to him doing them with me occasionally, he was also doing them behind my back, which I had caught him doing several times and was always forgiving over this.
So, because of this constant spending he was in a substantial amount of debt. What he told me at the time was around $6,000. Knowing him, this was probably a generous assessment. This is definitely a point in the story where I should have left him. Clearly he was developing this addiction towards N and spent an ungodly amount of money that was beyond even my comprehension. But, I was head over heels and believed that he could figure this out. People go into debt all the time, I would tell myself. But I told him, this all needed to outright stop. No more N, not even occasionally. Unfortunately while he of course agreed to my face I have to suspect now, he was doing it behind my back all the time. Around this time he wouldn’t come home from work until 7 or 7:30 which didn’t make sense as his hours at work would fluctuate from time to time, but he was usually always off at 5. He would lie and say his work was very busy and made him stay later, which I believed at the time.
Maybe about a month later we are in bed together sleeping, it’s the middle of the night. He wakes me up and explains he literally cannot feel his feet or legs and has been having trouble walking for the past several days. I take him to the ER that night. This night and the following weeks after were some of the most heartbreaking and emotionally terrifying times of my life so far. At this time neither of us had any idea or reason to suspect N was the reason for this. We actually talked to the doctor there and ran tests for over 3 hours, he got an MRI and a spinal tap which was so hard to watch being done to him. It wasn’t until I desperately did research on my phone in the hospital room and suddenly see all of these remarks and reddit posts and studies about N causing paralysis and nerve damage. I tell my bf and the doctor and they have no trouble assessing that is what is causing this. They give him a regiment of vitamin B shots as you typically do in this situation. The doctor even said that they hope they can stop permanent damage from happening, because if not he may lose control of his legs and it may spread to his pelvic area (IE dick don’t work) etc, he had to do physical therapy and see a drug counselor.
The following days and weeks after I was constantly on edge worrying and wondering if my bf and love of my life would lose his ability to walk. Thankfully, the treatment took and he didn’t even end up needing physical therapy. This is when I truly believe or would like to hope he actually quit and wasn’t doing N behind my back. Unfortunately it wouldn’t matter, as I’ve learned, a lot of symptoms of N abuse don’t show themselves until after you stop. Shortly after this event is when our relationship took a nosedive. He had also ditched the drug counselor. To compensate for no N he was drinking so often. He started to become aggressive and violent. I remember it all started in a fight where he got real close and in my face and stared me down to try and intimidate me. In a way it was both terrifying and laughable (because he’s only a few inches taller than me), I couldn’t even comprehend the kind of person he had turned into. After that came the months and months of never ending name calling, insults, degradation, and constant arguments over every little thing I did. He became so addicted to the high of his power trip of making me feel small and weak he would find any excuse to fly into a rage at me, even when we were tripping on mushrooms together.
Nothing was ever the same after that. We didn’t go out, didn’t do dates, and every activity together felt like it was all a big chore to him. I could look in his eyes and see he was constantly thinking about N, and when he would do it next. He really changed, and what I am now realizing is he was probably starting to experience the effects of pure brain damage. My close friends who knew him even agree with me that there is a huge change in his demeanor around this time in April of 2023.
I also want to add more info about his bizarre behavior. He started to develop an unhealthy obsession with social media, scrutinizing what I posted and what he posted. He started to obsess over current events of any kind, any breaking story or ongoing conflict and he would rant and rant about the current state of the world and destruction of humanity all the time. He started to get obsessed with mental health and psychology and pathologize me and himself and other people in our lives. He would send me 10 videos everyday about mental health and relationships and expect me to reply and have a response for every single one like a book report. This obsession with the destruction of humanity turned into a paranoia about the world, he would often say no one understands him, and he is all alone. He turned on his best friends of several years because he was paranoid they were racists or had bad morals (they were all pleasant and nice people who enjoy edgy humor from time to time). There was no more middle ground for anything, you either loved something fully, or hated it fully. Somewhere down the line he actually got his account banned on Instagram for the craziest reason. He couldn’t stop or control himself from having heated arguments with random strangers in comments sections, of almost any video of any topic. He would insult people there constantly.
Here is another big mistake I made.I allowed him to live with me, and we moved in together. At this point we had been dating for a year. Before this I lived on my own and didn’t want to renew my lease, and he was living with his dad who was abusive and financially took advantage of him. At the time I was convinced that this bad behavior would go away if he could get away from his dad and his toxic household. Well the toxicity only followed. That summer we went to another weekend festival and he revealed to me when we got there he had purchased N and brought it. I was so conflicted as I myself had missed it quite a lot, and I had to deny myself my healthy regulated usage of it in order to not trigger him. I caved again and said we could do it only for this weekend. You may not at all be surprised to learn it didn’t end that way.
After the festival everything truly fell apart. He continued to buy tanks of N and do them behind my back constantly. He would say he was just going to his car to talk to his friends, or his mom, and be gone for hours. Because he was totally abusing me and I had no idea because I was under his spell of manipulation, I had no recourse. Any comment of mine asking why he was gone for so long, why can’t he just talk to his friends inside our apartment, I’ll go in the other room for privacy, was only met with complete indifference. These questions only pissed him off. He would say it’s because I was so exhausting and demanding he needed a break from me. When I would call him when he’s on one of these “excursions,” he would every so often mute the call while I was talking or in a silent moment. I eventually realized he was hitting the tank every time he muted himself. When I finally called him out on this he gaslit me and told me he just does this all the time because he coughs and clears his throat, fyi he had never done this before in our relationship. Because I had no recourse I just had to agree and move on. And because his mind was deteriorating more and more each day he would go on to make randomly muting himself in calls as a common, thing so as to keep up the facade he told me. Actual crazy behavior.
He even started doing K again, he would clearly be f-ed out of his mind by both K and N, and stumble around our apartment with crazy red bulging eyes and again and again tell me he was just drunk. Around this time is when he finally divulges to me not only had he been abusing K for the 1.5 years before he met me, he had also been abusing N for 1.5 years before he met me. And it wasn’t actually the case that he only “began” to become addicted to N when we started dating and doing it together. This really started to put a lot into perspective for me, and it made sense how he had almost paralyzed himself over this, now at this current time 3+ year addiction to these substances, and it made me realize how psychologically and cognitively he was failing based on changes in his personality. You also have to understand he explained to me before he met me, he was doing 1.5-2 grams of K or more and N, EVERYDAY.
And still at this time the name calling, insults and manipulation continued. He of course was no longer experiencing any true “high” from the N anymore, it would just simply dull his senses. It was like a stereotypical violent alcoholic husband comes home from the bar and berates his wife, kind of situation, except with N. And I became obsessed with figuring out how to get him to stop and go back to the loving person I remembered meeting and loving. I began to do very toxic things, going through his backpack, going through his car, and constantly always finding tanks and balloons and all kinds of paraphilia everywhere. I would find tanks in our recycling bin, like he actually thought I wouldn’t notice. I would come home late from being with friends and catch him passed out on the couch with an empty tank in his hand. He couldn't be left alone anymore. If he wasn’t with me, 100% of the time he was sitting in his car doing N. At this point in time there was no forgiveness, I was completely broken. I would yell and scream at him or wake him up and demand he stop and choose me or the drugs, all terrible things to be doing. I know that.
Eventually it got so bad I felt I had no other recourse other than to call and inform his mother of his behavior and what he had been doing all this time. Me doing this is probably what saved his life, as there was never anyway I was going to get through to him myself. But it did not save his mental health. Even having his mother involved didn’t stop any of it. He still went out and bought it behind my back like nothing happened. Another painful painful aspect of how his personality had changed is he would constantly have crazy back and forth mood swings, one minute showing me the sweet man I had fallen in love with, thanking me and praising me for having stepped in and put a stop to this, the next minute he hated me and I was the worst thing in his life and I could never tell what was even real anymore.
But did I leave, oh no, that would have been the smart thing to do.Instead at the time I was seeing a therapist who also specializes in couples therapy. I get us started with counseling and during our second session he gets called out by my therapist and yells and screams and berates her, it was actually insane. That is when things really ended between us. He moved out and moved into his moms apartment 30 minutes away that night. Even though the breakup was traumatizing and painful I still had hope that even if he isn’t with me, now he will receive help from his mother. Well, she didn’t place him in any special drug counselor program or rehab, she just severely cut off his finances so that he could pay off his debts, which she had bought back from several banks so it would not gain more and more interest. I do believe now his debt may be somewhere in the $10,000-$20,000 range. So now he, as an almost 30 year old man, needs to ask his mother in order to buy or purchase anything. Somehow, despite all of this I would learn he was continuing to do N and K.
Amazingly, we still tried briefly to even make our relationship work after he moved out. At this point he has mastered the art of manipulation and being fake, and convinced me he was getting better, he had even started to look better too, but he was still up to his old BS. He came over to the apartment once for us to have a mini date. Because he went on and on about how he was getting more and more into walks he said he was going to take a quick stroll around the block to get some fresh air. Well a quick stroll turns into 30 minutes, and I start to notice his car is gone from our street. I call him and he says now he is sitting in his car talking to his mom, I tell him I don’t see his car and it’s been a long time, he clearly had left to buy N. He becomes irate and claims he simply moved his car down the block for “reasons” and I was in the wrong for being accusatory and not trusting him. P.S. I went down the block and he just was not there. This guy is either absolutely crazy or thinks I’m some kind of imbecile, or both. It basically ended from there.
We tried to be civil, but he cannot control himself from completely going ballistic on me anymore, or his mother. And it is so painful when he is remorseful and doesn’t remember all the things he said to me. At this point I have had to realize I am basically talking to and trying to reason with a mentally disabled person. The fun loving, easy going, creative, altruistic, thoughtful, smart and attentive man I met doesn’t exist anymore, and I don’t think he will ever come back. All that remains is the shell of a confused and angry person.
Some small things to address, how it came to be that he abused these drugs all the time before he met me is because his best friend was a drug dealer and in the beginning would give him all of these things for free. Once he was hooked and doing it everyday it seemed he would stop at no end to spend money and buy them. Yes K was definitely a contributor into his mild psychosis but I still think it would have happened even from the N abuse alone, based on research I’ve been doing lately. And yes I have to admit I think he had bad and malignant psychological traits before abusing drugs, and doing that made it all worse.
So that is the story of how I watched this man ruin his life, and scare away maybe the only person who could withstand experiencing all of his BS and still wanted to love and help him. There are SO MANY things I too should have done differently. There is also an age gap between us of 3 years, so I naively thought he had a better handle on his life than he really did. I do find it hard to understand how people can be so addicted at times, but in the end like my ex, everyone is trying to chase some kind of feeling or experience that came with it, rather than the drug itself.
Thank you for reading if you made it to the end.
TLDR: Two years ago I started dating a guy who wasn’t honest with me about his 1.5 years of Nitrous abuse before we started dating. He was a sweet and honest and caring man when I met him. Sadly most of our relationship was spent on doing lots of Nitrous together. He eventually developed health problems like a vitamin B deficiency and even almost got paralysis and permanent nerve damage, which was hard for me to watch and witness. His health issues didn’t deter him away from Nitrous and he was constantly buying tanks and doing it behind my back. The more he abused Nitrous the more abusive towards me he became as a person. Our relationship crumbled and not even getting his mom involved helped. He was also clearly experiencing psychosis and mental deterioration. We broke up because he yelled and screamed at my therapist and he had to move in with his mom. Moving in with his mom didn’t stop his addiction even though she cut off his finances.
Even when we tried to make the relationship work he still abused it anyway. I would now consider him a mentally disabled person and I don’t recognize who he even is anymore after 3+ years of abusing Nitrous almost everyday. Please use Nitrous responsibly or don't at all.
submitted by verminbby to NitrousOxideRecovery [link] [comments]
A lot of this will tackle interpersonal relationship dynamics, but I’m trying to illustrate to the reader the progression of how this drug took my ex’s mind. This is more of a thorough essay about my experience than a rant. When I was going through what I went through at the time, I wished there was a story like this out there to help me know better and understand. This is how I watched the love of my life melt away his brain on this drug.
I will try and keep this brief, but it probably won't be. I wish to convey the addictiveness this drug can have and the toll it can take on your mind and body. In the summer of 2022 I met my then bf who introduced me to the rave scene and drug scene he was a part of. He really only used K and Nitrous (which I will refer to as N going forward). He told me about his 1.5 years of being addicted to K, but did not inform me of his also 1.5 years (at the time) addiction to N. He told me after meeting me he didn’t want to abuse K anymore so as far as I knew when we started dating he got better about that.
It all started very early in the relationship. We went to a weekend festival together and both found doing N together was so fun. We continued on using and abusing N every weekend, and sometimes many weekdays. Probably going through 6 or 8+ tanks a week, this went on for like 3 months. Sadly, I do look back on those days fondly, despite what would happen later down the line. We had so much fun together and yes sadly it bonded us in this weird way. Using it causes you to feel more open and positive in the beginning, and we had so many heartfelt and deep conversations. And it felt like a little special world we could go into together.
At the time I had no clue how much those small-medium sized tanks cost ($65 and up for just one where we live). And he never told me how much they cost, and didn’t ask me to chip in, so I had no idea he was throwing himself into financial ruin buying them all the time. Looking back I have no idea why I didn’t ask, I just figured they were only $25 or something, or his friend was giving them to him, and I was aware it was probably a poor financial decision, but figured he could bounce back after the summer. You have to understand I thought I had him figured out, but I didn’t really know him that well at this point, or know about the drug scene at all. Before this I really only drank and smoked weed with the occasional cid or shrooms trip.
Three months into us dating and abusing N we come to the conclusion we just need to stop and take a break from N as this had all become quite excessive. Still he doesn’t explain to me how much debt he is in from buying all of those tanks over the summer. Two months into the break and he’s starting to crack, asking for me to be okay with us using it regularly. I tell him that I think it’s okay for us to just do it once and awhile. It was hard to not cave in because truthfully I missed it as well, I myself was starting to feel the addictiveness of this drug, so I reserved it so that I only ever did it with him. We go back to doing it occasionally on the weekends. Over the span of 1 month my bf started to constantly complain of having nerve issues, his feet and legs and hands were numb, I also noticed that he seemed really depressed. This is when he started to experience the vitamin B deficiency, although both me and him didn’t realize this at the time.
Around this time is when he finally and unceremoniously reveals to me how much these things actually cost. This is the tricky aspect of his personality I would go on to experience more of. It was clear he was resentful towards me, that I had no idea how much money he was spending, but the reality is if I had known how much those things cost I would have ended it a lot sooner. I didn’t even understand how he had the ability to spend so much money, I don’t even want to do the math. I would find out later he would just take out credit cards and max them out. In addition to him doing them with me occasionally, he was also doing them behind my back, which I had caught him doing several times and was always forgiving over this.
So, because of this constant spending he was in a substantial amount of debt. What he told me at the time was around $6,000. Knowing him, this was probably a generous assessment. This is definitely a point in the story where I should have left him. Clearly he was developing this addiction towards N and spent an ungodly amount of money that was beyond even my comprehension. But, I was head over heels and believed that he could figure this out. People go into debt all the time, I would tell myself. But I told him, this all needed to outright stop. No more N, not even occasionally. Unfortunately while he of course agreed to my face I have to suspect now, he was doing it behind my back all the time. Around this time he wouldn’t come home from work until 7 or 7:30 which didn’t make sense as his hours at work would fluctuate from time to time, but he was usually always off at 5. He would lie and say his work was very busy and made him stay later, which I believed at the time.
Maybe about a month later we are in bed together sleeping, it’s the middle of the night. He wakes me up and explains he literally cannot feel his feet or legs and has been having trouble walking for the past several days. I take him to the ER that night. This night and the following weeks after were some of the most heartbreaking and emotionally terrifying times of my life so far. At this time neither of us had any idea or reason to suspect N was the reason for this. We actually talked to the doctor there and ran tests for over 3 hours, he got an MRI and a spinal tap which was so hard to watch being done to him. It wasn’t until I desperately did research on my phone in the hospital room and suddenly see all of these remarks and reddit posts and studies about N causing paralysis and nerve damage. I tell my bf and the doctor and they have no trouble assessing that is what is causing this. They give him a regiment of vitamin B shots as you typically do in this situation. The doctor even said that they hope they can stop permanent damage from happening, because if not he may lose control of his legs and it may spread to his pelvic area (IE dick don’t work) etc, he had to do physical therapy and see a drug counselor.
The following days and weeks after I was constantly on edge worrying and wondering if my bf and love of my life would lose his ability to walk. Thankfully, the treatment took and he didn’t even end up needing physical therapy. This is when I truly believe or would like to hope he actually quit and wasn’t doing N behind my back. Unfortunately it wouldn’t matter, as I’ve learned, a lot of symptoms of N abuse don’t show themselves until after you stop. Shortly after this event is when our relationship took a nosedive. He had also ditched the drug counselor. To compensate for no N he was drinking so often. He started to become aggressive and violent. I remember it all started in a fight where he got real close and in my face and stared me down to try and intimidate me. In a way it was both terrifying and laughable (because he’s only a few inches taller than me), I couldn’t even comprehend the kind of person he had turned into. After that came the months and months of never ending name calling, insults, degradation, and constant arguments over every little thing I did. He became so addicted to the high of his power trip of making me feel small and weak he would find any excuse to fly into a rage at me, even when we were tripping on mushrooms together.
Nothing was ever the same after that. We didn’t go out, didn’t do dates, and every activity together felt like it was all a big chore to him. I could look in his eyes and see he was constantly thinking about N, and when he would do it next. He really changed, and what I am now realizing is he was probably starting to experience the effects of pure brain damage. My close friends who knew him even agree with me that there is a huge change in his demeanor around this time in April of 2023.
I also want to add more info about his bizarre behavior. He started to develop an unhealthy obsession with social media, scrutinizing what I posted and what he posted. He started to obsess over current events of any kind, any breaking story or ongoing conflict and he would rant and rant about the current state of the world and destruction of humanity all the time. He started to get obsessed with mental health and psychology and pathologize me and himself and other people in our lives. He would send me 10 videos everyday about mental health and relationships and expect me to reply and have a response for every single one like a book report. This obsession with the destruction of humanity turned into a paranoia about the world, he would often say no one understands him, and he is all alone. He turned on his best friends of several years because he was paranoid they were racists or had bad morals (they were all pleasant and nice people who enjoy edgy humor from time to time). There was no more middle ground for anything, you either loved something fully, or hated it fully. Somewhere down the line he actually got his account banned on Instagram for the craziest reason. He couldn’t stop or control himself from having heated arguments with random strangers in comments sections, of almost any video of any topic. He would insult people there constantly.
Here is another big mistake I made.I allowed him to live with me, and we moved in together. At this point we had been dating for a year. Before this I lived on my own and didn’t want to renew my lease, and he was living with his dad who was abusive and financially took advantage of him. At the time I was convinced that this bad behavior would go away if he could get away from his dad and his toxic household. Well the toxicity only followed. That summer we went to another weekend festival and he revealed to me when we got there he had purchased N and brought it. I was so conflicted as I myself had missed it quite a lot, and I had to deny myself my healthy regulated usage of it in order to not trigger him. I caved again and said we could do it only for this weekend. You may not at all be surprised to learn it didn’t end that way.
After the festival everything truly fell apart. He continued to buy tanks of N and do them behind my back constantly. He would say he was just going to his car to talk to his friends, or his mom, and be gone for hours. Because he was totally abusing me and I had no idea because I was under his spell of manipulation, I had no recourse. Any comment of mine asking why he was gone for so long, why can’t he just talk to his friends inside our apartment, I’ll go in the other room for privacy, was only met with complete indifference. These questions only pissed him off. He would say it’s because I was so exhausting and demanding he needed a break from me. When I would call him when he’s on one of these “excursions,” he would every so often mute the call while I was talking or in a silent moment. I eventually realized he was hitting the tank every time he muted himself. When I finally called him out on this he gaslit me and told me he just does this all the time because he coughs and clears his throat, fyi he had never done this before in our relationship. Because I had no recourse I just had to agree and move on. And because his mind was deteriorating more and more each day he would go on to make randomly muting himself in calls as a common, thing so as to keep up the facade he told me. Actual crazy behavior.
He even started doing K again, he would clearly be f-ed out of his mind by both K and N, and stumble around our apartment with crazy red bulging eyes and again and again tell me he was just drunk. Around this time is when he finally divulges to me not only had he been abusing K for the 1.5 years before he met me, he had also been abusing N for 1.5 years before he met me. And it wasn’t actually the case that he only “began” to become addicted to N when we started dating and doing it together. This really started to put a lot into perspective for me, and it made sense how he had almost paralyzed himself over this, now at this current time 3+ year addiction to these substances, and it made me realize how psychologically and cognitively he was failing based on changes in his personality. You also have to understand he explained to me before he met me, he was doing 1.5-2 grams of K or more and N, EVERYDAY.
And still at this time the name calling, insults and manipulation continued. He of course was no longer experiencing any true “high” from the N anymore, it would just simply dull his senses. It was like a stereotypical violent alcoholic husband comes home from the bar and berates his wife, kind of situation, except with N. And I became obsessed with figuring out how to get him to stop and go back to the loving person I remembered meeting and loving. I began to do very toxic things, going through his backpack, going through his car, and constantly always finding tanks and balloons and all kinds of paraphilia everywhere. I would find tanks in our recycling bin, like he actually thought I wouldn’t notice. I would come home late from being with friends and catch him passed out on the couch with an empty tank in his hand. He couldn't be left alone anymore. If he wasn’t with me, 100% of the time he was sitting in his car doing N. At this point in time there was no forgiveness, I was completely broken. I would yell and scream at him or wake him up and demand he stop and choose me or the drugs, all terrible things to be doing. I know that.
Eventually it got so bad I felt I had no other recourse other than to call and inform his mother of his behavior and what he had been doing all this time. Me doing this is probably what saved his life, as there was never anyway I was going to get through to him myself. But it did not save his mental health. Even having his mother involved didn’t stop any of it. He still went out and bought it behind my back like nothing happened. Another painful painful aspect of how his personality had changed is he would constantly have crazy back and forth mood swings, one minute showing me the sweet man I had fallen in love with, thanking me and praising me for having stepped in and put a stop to this, the next minute he hated me and I was the worst thing in his life and I could never tell what was even real anymore.
But did I leave, oh no, that would have been the smart thing to do.Instead at the time I was seeing a therapist who also specializes in couples therapy. I get us started with counseling and during our second session he gets called out by my therapist and yells and screams and berates her, it was actually insane. That is when things really ended between us. He moved out and moved into his moms apartment 30 minutes away that night. Even though the breakup was traumatizing and painful I still had hope that even if he isn’t with me, now he will receive help from his mother. Well, she didn’t place him in any special drug counselor program or rehab, she just severely cut off his finances so that he could pay off his debts, which she had bought back from several banks so it would not gain more and more interest. I do believe now his debt may be somewhere in the $10,000-$20,000 range. So now he, as an almost 30 year old man, needs to ask his mother in order to buy or purchase anything. Somehow, despite all of this I would learn he was continuing to do N and K.
Amazingly, we still tried briefly to even make our relationship work after he moved out. At this point he has mastered the art of manipulation and being fake, and convinced me he was getting better, he had even started to look better too, but he was still up to his old BS. He came over to the apartment once for us to have a mini date. Because he went on and on about how he was getting more and more into walks he said he was going to take a quick stroll around the block to get some fresh air. Well a quick stroll turns into 30 minutes, and I start to notice his car is gone from our street. I call him and he says now he is sitting in his car talking to his mom, I tell him I don’t see his car and it’s been a long time, he clearly had left to buy N. He becomes irate and claims he simply moved his car down the block for “reasons” and I was in the wrong for being accusatory and not trusting him. P.S. I went down the block and he just was not there. This guy is either absolutely crazy or thinks I’m some kind of imbecile, or both. It basically ended from there.
We tried to be civil, but he cannot control himself from completely going ballistic on me anymore, or his mother. And it is so painful when he is remorseful and doesn’t remember all the things he said to me. At this point I have had to realize I am basically talking to and trying to reason with a mentally disabled person. The fun loving, easy going, creative, altruistic, thoughtful, smart and attentive man I met doesn’t exist anymore, and I don’t think he will ever come back. All that remains is the shell of a confused and angry person.
Some small things to address, how it came to be that he abused these drugs all the time before he met me is because his best friend was a drug dealer and in the beginning would give him all of these things for free. Once he was hooked and doing it everyday it seemed he would stop at no end to spend money and buy them. Yes K was definitely a contributor into his mild psychosis but I still think it would have happened even from the N abuse alone, based on research I’ve been doing lately. And yes I have to admit I think he had bad and malignant psychological traits before abusing drugs, and doing that made it all worse.
So that is the story of how I watched this man ruin his life, and scare away maybe the only person who could withstand experiencing all of his BS and still wanted to love and help him. There are SO MANY things I too should have done differently. There is also an age gap between us of 3 years, so I naively thought he had a better handle on his life than he really did. I do find it hard to understand how people can be so addicted at times, but in the end like my ex, everyone is trying to chase some kind of feeling or experience that came with it, rather than the drug itself.
Thank you for reading if you made it to the end.
TLDR: Two years ago I started dating a guy who wasn’t honest with me about his 1.5 years of Nitrous abuse before we started dating. He was a sweet and honest and caring man when I met him. Sadly most of our relationship was spent on doing lots of Nitrous together. He eventually developed health problems like a vitamin B deficiency and even almost got paralysis and permanent nerve damage, which was hard for me to watch and witness. His health issues didn’t deter him away from Nitrous and he was constantly buying tanks and doing it behind my back. The more he abused Nitrous the more abusive towards me he became as a person. Our relationship crumbled and not even getting his mom involved helped. He was also clearly experiencing psychosis and mental deterioration. We broke up because he yelled and screamed at my therapist and he had to move in with his mom. Moving in with his mom didn’t stop his addiction even though she cut off his finances.
Even when we tried to make the relationship work he still abused it anyway. I would now consider him a mentally disabled person and I don’t recognize who he even is anymore after 3+ years of abusing Nitrous almost everyday. Please use Nitrous responsibly or don't at all.
2024.05.13 23:08 Mountain-Low-8719 Sonja's Diary
The following journal entries were written by Sonja Dorfmann, sister of the perpetrator in the days leading up to her running away from home and the murder of her parents and Paula Forst.
June 13, 2021
School is out for the summer! That means I have to endure six weeks at home with my awful family. On the plus side, I have enough time to work on my painting. It's something that I've been thinking about for most of the school year and I can't wait to turn it in to the art contest.
June 17, 2021
Lately, my older brother, Benedikt has been acting even more harsh towards me. He has always been such a bully towards me. And whenever he gets mad, he would either blame me for Mom leaving us when we were younger or take his anger out on me or anyone else for whatever problem he had going on. Sometimes I wish I could live with my older sister, Liesa and her girlfriend in America so that I wouldn't have to worry about everything.
June 18, 2021
I think my painting is nearly done. It describes a young girl surrounded by beautiful red flowers and a glass dome that are protecting her from the monsters that are trying to take her back. To me, I think the monsters represent my father through his drinking alcohol and hitting me when he gets drunk and my brother through berating me and also hitting me when he doesn't get what he wants. Once I finish painting this, I'll make sure to mail my painting and prove them wrong.
June 20, 2021
My older brother is a horrible person and an asshole. He not only looked through my journal, but he destroyed my painting. After that, he lied saying some animal broke into the house and tore it apart. But I know what really happened. So that evening, I sneaked into his room and went through his notebook. What I saw haunted me and even gave me nightmares. On every page, my brother wanted to kill me. But he didn't just want to kill me, he wanted to kill our parents, his former classmates, and a girl named Paula Forst.
I need to get out of here before he kills me first. But how? Then it came to me. I have to run away from home and live with Tante Irma. She's my mom's sister and she would be willing to take me in.
June 26, 2021
It's been a few days since I left home. I'm now staying with my aunt, Irma. When I first arrived, she gave me a hug saying how happy she was that I left this hellhole of a home I grew up in behind. She then told me that I can stay here for a few days. I opted to stay in the guest room as my two cousins were already asleep and they already have their own rooms. Now I'm looking forward to calling mom and telling her that I'm staying with Tante Irma. I hope she'll be relieved to know about this.
June 27, 2021
I tried calling Mom yesterday, but she hasn't picked up the phone. Maybe she's working an overtime shift at her new job in the hospital? I mused. But it wouldn't make sense. After all, the hospital would never allow Mom to take the night shift or even an overtime shift for that matter. I just hope she's okay.
July 2, 2021
Mom. She's dead. The police came to our house to tell me and Tante Irma the horrible news of what happened. Two adolescent boys entered the house where my dad and brother lived and found their dead bodies covered in bags. They then called the police who entered the backyard and found the bodies of my parents and Paula, the girl whose name I saw in the notebook. Not only that, but they arrested the one responsible for the murders: my own brother Benedikt.
I couldn't believe it.
My brother who treated me like trash is a murderer. And my parents are gone.
November 16, 2021
It's been four months since I last wrote in this journal. I just didn't have the time to do so what with the trial for the murder of my parents and going back to school. After the deaths of my parents, Tante Irma told me that I can stay with her for as long as I wanted. I gave her a big hug with tears streaming down my cheeks and said, "Thank you." I've been attending therapy and I still have nightmares about what happened.
But I'm getting better. Bit by little bit. I only hope to be a therapist so that I can help children like me who are going through terrible situations at home so that way they won't do the same horrible things my brother did.
submitted by Mountain-Low-8719 to joinmeatthecampfire [link] [comments]
June 13, 2021
School is out for the summer! That means I have to endure six weeks at home with my awful family. On the plus side, I have enough time to work on my painting. It's something that I've been thinking about for most of the school year and I can't wait to turn it in to the art contest.
June 17, 2021
Lately, my older brother, Benedikt has been acting even more harsh towards me. He has always been such a bully towards me. And whenever he gets mad, he would either blame me for Mom leaving us when we were younger or take his anger out on me or anyone else for whatever problem he had going on. Sometimes I wish I could live with my older sister, Liesa and her girlfriend in America so that I wouldn't have to worry about everything.
June 18, 2021
I think my painting is nearly done. It describes a young girl surrounded by beautiful red flowers and a glass dome that are protecting her from the monsters that are trying to take her back. To me, I think the monsters represent my father through his drinking alcohol and hitting me when he gets drunk and my brother through berating me and also hitting me when he doesn't get what he wants. Once I finish painting this, I'll make sure to mail my painting and prove them wrong.
June 20, 2021
My older brother is a horrible person and an asshole. He not only looked through my journal, but he destroyed my painting. After that, he lied saying some animal broke into the house and tore it apart. But I know what really happened. So that evening, I sneaked into his room and went through his notebook. What I saw haunted me and even gave me nightmares. On every page, my brother wanted to kill me. But he didn't just want to kill me, he wanted to kill our parents, his former classmates, and a girl named Paula Forst.
I need to get out of here before he kills me first. But how? Then it came to me. I have to run away from home and live with Tante Irma. She's my mom's sister and she would be willing to take me in.
June 26, 2021
It's been a few days since I left home. I'm now staying with my aunt, Irma. When I first arrived, she gave me a hug saying how happy she was that I left this hellhole of a home I grew up in behind. She then told me that I can stay here for a few days. I opted to stay in the guest room as my two cousins were already asleep and they already have their own rooms. Now I'm looking forward to calling mom and telling her that I'm staying with Tante Irma. I hope she'll be relieved to know about this.
June 27, 2021
I tried calling Mom yesterday, but she hasn't picked up the phone. Maybe she's working an overtime shift at her new job in the hospital? I mused. But it wouldn't make sense. After all, the hospital would never allow Mom to take the night shift or even an overtime shift for that matter. I just hope she's okay.
July 2, 2021
Mom. She's dead. The police came to our house to tell me and Tante Irma the horrible news of what happened. Two adolescent boys entered the house where my dad and brother lived and found their dead bodies covered in bags. They then called the police who entered the backyard and found the bodies of my parents and Paula, the girl whose name I saw in the notebook. Not only that, but they arrested the one responsible for the murders: my own brother Benedikt.
I couldn't believe it.
My brother who treated me like trash is a murderer. And my parents are gone.
November 16, 2021
It's been four months since I last wrote in this journal. I just didn't have the time to do so what with the trial for the murder of my parents and going back to school. After the deaths of my parents, Tante Irma told me that I can stay with her for as long as I wanted. I gave her a big hug with tears streaming down my cheeks and said, "Thank you." I've been attending therapy and I still have nightmares about what happened.
But I'm getting better. Bit by little bit. I only hope to be a therapist so that I can help children like me who are going through terrible situations at home so that way they won't do the same horrible things my brother did.
2024.05.13 23:03 PerformancePrudent67 Life recently
So I(19F) have been miserable these past months. Everything began by my beloved grandma suddenly dying in august of 2023, which threw me off my track totaly. A month after that the guy I really loved left me which was kinda my fault. Before that I was happy for uni, couldnt wait to meet new people and study what I loved(Comp sci). I even started studying in june of that year because I couldnt wait. When semester started I just couldnt bring myself to do anything. I just stayed on my laptop playing games rotting in my chair. I passed 4 out of 5 of my classes in 1st semester which was good but now in 2nd i failed 4 out of 5 because I just cant make myself do anything anymore. Just today Ive had an arguement with my dad. I started a game of Siege(maybe 3rd that day and 1st since I sat down at the time) and my sister told me that mom said to her that I need to vaccuum the flat, which I tought was strange because she would call me and tell me to do it not her. I told her I cant right now and to wait and my dad yelled that I dont have to do it and that he will do it himself(angrily) then he turned the wi-fi off which kicked me out of the game. I went to the living room and saw what he did and i clapped 2 to 3 times and went to search for vaccuum to which he didnt respond good. He walked after me and stopped when I stopped next to vaccuum. He dtarted yelling something and slapped me to which I said “Yeah because this is the only thing you can do” meaning to slap me, which wasnt the first time ofc, we are balkan lol. And he froze for a moment and tried to get closer to me but stopped and yelled some more and didnt let me get the vaccuum. I went to my room and got ready for gym to which he said he wont be allowing me/paying to go to gym next month. I mean its fair to not wanna pay but I have no energy to work and I barely can go to uni, gym is the only thing keeping me out. I went to gym normally and on my way home I was sobbing and when I came home my mom saw me crying and kinda verbally attacked me when I didnt wanna say why I was crying. Then I told her I had an arguement with dad and she took his side eithout me even explaining anything which hurt but I did expect her to do this. I just wanted someone to take my side and hug me because lifes just hell. I dont need sympathy in comments, Im just venting here because I dont have anyone to vent to in real life. I know my prents are angry at me for not doing my chores on time but I just dont have energy nor will to do anythinggg, I can barely play games. In the end, my mom and my sister were talking in the kitchen and I found out my sister was the one tht was supposed to do the chores and not me, which meand nothing of this shouldve happend. Shes always throwing me under the bus. I have doctors appointment in 8 days and I will probably tell them how I feel and of theres aynthing they can do to help me. If not then I guess theres only one way out. But im also really sad to leave my boyfriend all alone. There might be updates
submitted by PerformancePrudent67 to Vent [link] [comments]
2024.05.13 23:01 Green_indicaBruja Its my sister's birthday and part of me doesn't want to do anything for her..
My sister and I havent been in good terms since Easter. Im mad and disappointed at her for different reasons but the ones that weight the most are her living with my mom who is disable and not giving her any money for the bills/food and her not respecting my relationship with my boyfriend.
I love her dearly but her attitude makes me feel so sad and also pissis me off at the same time. It makes me mad that she is disrespectful to my mom but yet is living with her rent free. My mom isn't the easiest person to live with but at the end of the day its her house and she makes the rules and it has always been like that ever since we were kids. She shows tough love but isn't a bully as my sister portraits her. My sister doesnt belive in showing respect unless respect is shown to her but yet she forgets my mom is still letting her stay there and shares food with her (but my sister doesnt share food with my mom) I hate that she is there and doesnt want to help with anything and my mom just lets her because she feels she cant force her to do otherwise (Ive told her she can take legal action but she just wants to sell her house and move instead) Aside from that what saddens me is that she belives that I choose my boyfriend over her. She's my only sibling and I love her to death but I'm also not going to break up with him just cause she doesn't like him. She hasn't even gotten to know him but she doesn't feel like she has to. She says she just has a feeling about him and that she sees something dark in him (even though Ive never felt unconditional love before him nor how it feels for a partner to support you in every way possible. He's definitely not a perfect human but who is?) I would love to go and celebrate her birthday with her because I dont want to look back to regret that I didn't but I also cant fake and pretend that everything is fine. A part of me just wants to call her to wish her a happy birthday and send her $20 for a meal but another part wants to take it to her but Im afraid she's going to reject it and that shit is just going to hurt more..
submitted by Green_indicaBruja to LifeAdvice [link] [comments]
I love her dearly but her attitude makes me feel so sad and also pissis me off at the same time. It makes me mad that she is disrespectful to my mom but yet is living with her rent free. My mom isn't the easiest person to live with but at the end of the day its her house and she makes the rules and it has always been like that ever since we were kids. She shows tough love but isn't a bully as my sister portraits her. My sister doesnt belive in showing respect unless respect is shown to her but yet she forgets my mom is still letting her stay there and shares food with her (but my sister doesnt share food with my mom) I hate that she is there and doesnt want to help with anything and my mom just lets her because she feels she cant force her to do otherwise (Ive told her she can take legal action but she just wants to sell her house and move instead) Aside from that what saddens me is that she belives that I choose my boyfriend over her. She's my only sibling and I love her to death but I'm also not going to break up with him just cause she doesn't like him. She hasn't even gotten to know him but she doesn't feel like she has to. She says she just has a feeling about him and that she sees something dark in him (even though Ive never felt unconditional love before him nor how it feels for a partner to support you in every way possible. He's definitely not a perfect human but who is?) I would love to go and celebrate her birthday with her because I dont want to look back to regret that I didn't but I also cant fake and pretend that everything is fine. A part of me just wants to call her to wish her a happy birthday and send her $20 for a meal but another part wants to take it to her but Im afraid she's going to reject it and that shit is just going to hurt more..
2024.05.13 23:00 JCooppercorn WIBTA Cutting Family Ties
WIBTA if I cut off my aunt and sister after a trip to the UK they paid for?
To give back story, I 36F am a therapist who has been making in on their own since I was 17. Growing up was not easy… let’s just say my family was a mess. I have made the best of my life… I graduated high school in 3 years, BA in 3 years, took 3 years off and got my MSW in 2 years. I have significant student debt. I have been lucky in the past few years where I was able to take out a mortgage on a small 800 square foot home. I moved away from a city and state I loved to do so. I wanted to pursue a better financial position for myself but that meant going across the US. Still I live pretty much pay check to pay check.
In addition to poor family live and a hard financial situation. I have major medical problems. I have had 12 surgeries before the age of 36 and still need several more. I can’t afford to take the time off or the medical expenses. For example I had a hysterectomy in December and returned to work after 5 days. Due to my medical situation I am not in the best shape and I know I am overweight. At this time I am about 240 lbs. I eat pretty healthy and avoid most junk and fast food. Weight is difficulty due to my inability to workout or stay extremely active. FYI I am still pretty active and DYI large house project including making my own paver stones for my stone which was about 5 tons of cement I mixed by hand in buckets.
My only aunt on my father side lived 5 hours away from my new location. I reached out to her when I moved as we have had a distant relationship but still maintained contacted. She never seemed interested in making our relationship stronger even though I was only a 5 hour drive from her instead of 20. About three years after my move her ex husband passed away. She suddenly was interested in having a relationship with me. As I do want to have relationships with the remaining family I have I met her where she was at. I don’t hold a grudge. I went to visit her while one of my siblings was visiting her in 8/2023. She found out in that trip I wanted to visit the UK the following year. She asked if I’d like to go with her on a trip. FYI she had taken me on a similar trip for a graduation present from grad school. I did not ask her for either trip and would have been happy postponing my trip due not being able to afford the trip on my own. (The reason I wanted to go to the UK is my middle sister lives there and has for the past 21 years… we have large age gaps in my family. I am the youngest) Money is tight for me and always has been.
She has been wonderful and paid for many things… again nothing I have asked for … she has even denied me paying for meals on this trip. I have tried to pay for small things or pick up small gifts when she is not paying attention. Well we have 4 more days on the 13 day trip, staying with my sister at this point in the vacation. All I want to do is book a flight home and tell her and sister to f**k off.
My sister, her husband and my aunt have been making comments for the past 3 days about other peoples bodies. How it is unacceptable to be large or have a potbelly. We are sitting down at afternoon tea today ( not high tea just a cup of tea) and she starts talking about one of her son’s friends, older sisters not dating because men do not find her attractive. I was a bit confused…there is always someone out there for someone. She mentions the woman’s weight which is not to much more than my weight is the grand scene of things. I mention this and she says oh but it’s different because of XYZ. Immediately I am sensitive as my weight is a sore spot. I excuse my self to bathroom but have a long cry to myself and just can’t shake it. After tea we continue walking the gardens. I explain to my sister privately I am upset. She tells me to ignore it take a deep breath and how this was not directed at me. I explained I knew it was not towards me but it still hurts. My sister just continues to justify the actions of everyone. I stated it is hard to hear how my loved view people who are overweight because I know I am. There is no hiding it. My sister quickly got defensives and stated no one would ever think that of me due to my medical stuff. I replied but if that is how you all people like me there must be some underlying judgement, it’s human nature. Hello, I’m the therapist… you don’t just turn off your natural judgements for one person in your life. Again my sister disagreed with me. So I said I was just going to keep my mouth shut and wanted alone time in the evening and to be left alone. I can’t help but feel judged by my closest sibling and aunt. The tears just won’t stop. My romantic partner has offered to send all the money he has to fly my home immediately. I thanked him and told him I loved him but I don’t want to start that drama.
Right now I feel like a performing monkey as she keeps asking me disclose all the trauma from childhood as well… as she did not know what was happening in my family. I don’t feel like I can deny her as she spent all this money on me.
Would I be the asshole if when I return from this trip in 4 days to cut my sister and my aunt off for their judgements and invaliding my feelings after they have spent so much money on me?
submitted by JCooppercorn to AITAH [link] [comments]
To give back story, I 36F am a therapist who has been making in on their own since I was 17. Growing up was not easy… let’s just say my family was a mess. I have made the best of my life… I graduated high school in 3 years, BA in 3 years, took 3 years off and got my MSW in 2 years. I have significant student debt. I have been lucky in the past few years where I was able to take out a mortgage on a small 800 square foot home. I moved away from a city and state I loved to do so. I wanted to pursue a better financial position for myself but that meant going across the US. Still I live pretty much pay check to pay check.
In addition to poor family live and a hard financial situation. I have major medical problems. I have had 12 surgeries before the age of 36 and still need several more. I can’t afford to take the time off or the medical expenses. For example I had a hysterectomy in December and returned to work after 5 days. Due to my medical situation I am not in the best shape and I know I am overweight. At this time I am about 240 lbs. I eat pretty healthy and avoid most junk and fast food. Weight is difficulty due to my inability to workout or stay extremely active. FYI I am still pretty active and DYI large house project including making my own paver stones for my stone which was about 5 tons of cement I mixed by hand in buckets.
My only aunt on my father side lived 5 hours away from my new location. I reached out to her when I moved as we have had a distant relationship but still maintained contacted. She never seemed interested in making our relationship stronger even though I was only a 5 hour drive from her instead of 20. About three years after my move her ex husband passed away. She suddenly was interested in having a relationship with me. As I do want to have relationships with the remaining family I have I met her where she was at. I don’t hold a grudge. I went to visit her while one of my siblings was visiting her in 8/2023. She found out in that trip I wanted to visit the UK the following year. She asked if I’d like to go with her on a trip. FYI she had taken me on a similar trip for a graduation present from grad school. I did not ask her for either trip and would have been happy postponing my trip due not being able to afford the trip on my own. (The reason I wanted to go to the UK is my middle sister lives there and has for the past 21 years… we have large age gaps in my family. I am the youngest) Money is tight for me and always has been.
She has been wonderful and paid for many things… again nothing I have asked for … she has even denied me paying for meals on this trip. I have tried to pay for small things or pick up small gifts when she is not paying attention. Well we have 4 more days on the 13 day trip, staying with my sister at this point in the vacation. All I want to do is book a flight home and tell her and sister to f**k off.
My sister, her husband and my aunt have been making comments for the past 3 days about other peoples bodies. How it is unacceptable to be large or have a potbelly. We are sitting down at afternoon tea today ( not high tea just a cup of tea) and she starts talking about one of her son’s friends, older sisters not dating because men do not find her attractive. I was a bit confused…there is always someone out there for someone. She mentions the woman’s weight which is not to much more than my weight is the grand scene of things. I mention this and she says oh but it’s different because of XYZ. Immediately I am sensitive as my weight is a sore spot. I excuse my self to bathroom but have a long cry to myself and just can’t shake it. After tea we continue walking the gardens. I explain to my sister privately I am upset. She tells me to ignore it take a deep breath and how this was not directed at me. I explained I knew it was not towards me but it still hurts. My sister just continues to justify the actions of everyone. I stated it is hard to hear how my loved view people who are overweight because I know I am. There is no hiding it. My sister quickly got defensives and stated no one would ever think that of me due to my medical stuff. I replied but if that is how you all people like me there must be some underlying judgement, it’s human nature. Hello, I’m the therapist… you don’t just turn off your natural judgements for one person in your life. Again my sister disagreed with me. So I said I was just going to keep my mouth shut and wanted alone time in the evening and to be left alone. I can’t help but feel judged by my closest sibling and aunt. The tears just won’t stop. My romantic partner has offered to send all the money he has to fly my home immediately. I thanked him and told him I loved him but I don’t want to start that drama.
Right now I feel like a performing monkey as she keeps asking me disclose all the trauma from childhood as well… as she did not know what was happening in my family. I don’t feel like I can deny her as she spent all this money on me.
Would I be the asshole if when I return from this trip in 4 days to cut my sister and my aunt off for their judgements and invaliding my feelings after they have spent so much money on me?
2024.05.13 22:55 sardinexan I think my mom is getting chronically depressed and I have no idea how to approach this
Recently, the hard working, always happy, supportive mother has somehow lost her touch. I don’t know what it is and it’s hard seeing her like this. Perhaps it’s age, perhaps it’s something we’re not seeing, she’s just not the same.
For some background, I’ve grown up in a very religious household so most of the problems that we seem to have are solved by God, prayer, or miracles, which I also believe but to a degree. Anytime we had any serious issues the first solution mom or dad would suggest is that we pray and ask God to heal whatever the issue was. I myself suffered with severe depression, anxiety, the full 9. I was a walking mental illness; mom was the main reason I had solace in the matter, and now I want the same for her.
As of late, my parents have taken steps in seeing therapy and medication in a new light even though they have been skeptical beforehand. For example my sister just recently started therapy on a count of my father paying for it and now they want the same for me. With this, I had hoped my mother would be open and honest about what she’s been feeling lately to my father at least. Something she said caught my attention, she was telling me something along the lines of her feeling like a burden lately and that she just wants to stay out of everyone’s way since “she’s such a bad mother” in a burst of anger. She’s also been locking herself away a lot more and isn’t seeing progress in her physical health anymore.
I don’t know if I’m over sharing, or if I should be giving more context, all I know is that I’m trying to prevent her from feeling the same way I did. What do y’all think? Should I talk to her about therapy, ask if she just wants someone to talk to about it? Let me know.
submitted by sardinexan to Parents [link] [comments]
For some background, I’ve grown up in a very religious household so most of the problems that we seem to have are solved by God, prayer, or miracles, which I also believe but to a degree. Anytime we had any serious issues the first solution mom or dad would suggest is that we pray and ask God to heal whatever the issue was. I myself suffered with severe depression, anxiety, the full 9. I was a walking mental illness; mom was the main reason I had solace in the matter, and now I want the same for her.
As of late, my parents have taken steps in seeing therapy and medication in a new light even though they have been skeptical beforehand. For example my sister just recently started therapy on a count of my father paying for it and now they want the same for me. With this, I had hoped my mother would be open and honest about what she’s been feeling lately to my father at least. Something she said caught my attention, she was telling me something along the lines of her feeling like a burden lately and that she just wants to stay out of everyone’s way since “she’s such a bad mother” in a burst of anger. She’s also been locking herself away a lot more and isn’t seeing progress in her physical health anymore.
I don’t know if I’m over sharing, or if I should be giving more context, all I know is that I’m trying to prevent her from feeling the same way I did. What do y’all think? Should I talk to her about therapy, ask if she just wants someone to talk to about it? Let me know.
2024.05.13 22:53 sardinexan I think my mom is getting chronically depressed and I have no idea how to approach this
Recently, the hard working, always happy, supportive mother has somehow lost her touch. I don’t know what it is and it’s hard seeing her like this. Perhaps it’s age, perhaps it’s something we’re not seeing, she’s just not the same.
For some background, I’ve grown up in a very religious household so most of the problems that we seem to have are solved by God, prayer, or miracles, which I also believe but to a degree. Anytime we had any serious issues the first solution mom or dad would suggest is that we pray and ask God to heal whatever the issue was. I myself suffered with severe depression, anxiety, the full 9. I was a walking mental illness; mom was the main reason I had solace in the matter, and now I want the same for her.
As of late, my parents have taken steps in seeing therapy and medication in a new light even though they have been skeptical beforehand. For example my sister just recently started therapy on a count of my father paying for it and now they want the same for me. With this, I had hoped my mother would be open and honest about what she’s been feeling lately to my father at least. Something she said caught my attention, she was telling me something along the lines of her feeling like a burden lately and that she just wants to stay out of everyone’s way since “she’s such a bad mother” in a burst of anger. She’s also been locking herself away a lot more and isn’t seeing progress in her physical health anymore.
I don’t know if I’m over sharing, or if I should be giving more context, all I know is that I’m trying to prevent her from feeling the same way I did. What do y’all think? Should I talk to her about therapy, ask if she just wants someone to talk to about it? Let me know.
submitted by sardinexan to Advice [link] [comments]
For some background, I’ve grown up in a very religious household so most of the problems that we seem to have are solved by God, prayer, or miracles, which I also believe but to a degree. Anytime we had any serious issues the first solution mom or dad would suggest is that we pray and ask God to heal whatever the issue was. I myself suffered with severe depression, anxiety, the full 9. I was a walking mental illness; mom was the main reason I had solace in the matter, and now I want the same for her.
As of late, my parents have taken steps in seeing therapy and medication in a new light even though they have been skeptical beforehand. For example my sister just recently started therapy on a count of my father paying for it and now they want the same for me. With this, I had hoped my mother would be open and honest about what she’s been feeling lately to my father at least. Something she said caught my attention, she was telling me something along the lines of her feeling like a burden lately and that she just wants to stay out of everyone’s way since “she’s such a bad mother” in a burst of anger. She’s also been locking herself away a lot more and isn’t seeing progress in her physical health anymore.
I don’t know if I’m over sharing, or if I should be giving more context, all I know is that I’m trying to prevent her from feeling the same way I did. What do y’all think? Should I talk to her about therapy, ask if she just wants someone to talk to about it? Let me know.
2024.05.13 22:53 shaneka69 CANCER ZODIAC - UNEXPECTED INCOME! TAROT READING MAY 2024
CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyYcancer zodiac
cancer zodiac dates
10 things about cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac traits
cancer zodiac personality
cancer zodiac symbol
cancer zodiac month
cancer zodiac tattoo
cancer zodiac characteristics
cancer zodiac facts
cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac animal
cancer zodiac and capricorn
cancer zodiac art
cancer zodiac aesthetic
cancer zodiac air sign
cancer zodiac astrology
cancer zodiac attributes
cancer zodiac and scorpio
cancer zodiac and aries
cancer zodiac and aquarius
about cancer zodiac sign
all about cancer zodiac
are cancer zodiac dangerous
about cancer zodiac sign girl
age of cancer zodiac
attributes of cancer zodiac sign
after cancer zodiac
animal for cancer zodiac sign
anime characters cancer zodiac
aries and cancer zodiac sign compatibility
cancer zodiac birthday
cancer zodiac bad traits
cancer zodiac birthstone
cancer zodiac best match
cancer zodiac birth dates
cancer zodiac body part
cancer zodiac background
cancer zodiac bracelet
cancer zodiac best friends
cancer zodiac baby girl
best crystals for cancer zodiac
bad things about cancer zodiac
boy cancer zodiac
best match for cancer zodiac
birthday wishes for cancer zodiac
best color for cancer zodiac
best job for cancer zodiac
best stone for cancer zodiac
birthstone for cancer zodiac
bracelet for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac compatibility
cancer zodiac color
cancer zodiac celebrities
cancer zodiac constellation
cancer zodiac crystals
cancer zodiac color palette
cancer zodiac characteristics female
cancer zodiac compatibility chart
cancer zodiac chinese
cancer zodiac sign dates
cancer zodiac dates range
cancer zodiac description
cancer zodiac days
cancer zodiac demon
cancer zodiac drawing
cancer zodiac daily
cancer zodiac dates 2024
cancer zodiac dogs
cancer zodiac dark side
definition of cancer zodiac sign
dates for cancer zodiac sign
dark side of cancer zodiac signs
dragon cancer zodiac
different types of cancer zodiac
demon cancer zodiac
does cancer zodiac have anger issues
description of cancer zodiac sign
double cancer zodiac
diamond for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac element
cancer zodiac emoji
cancer zodiac enemies
cancer zodiac explained
cancer zodiac earrings
cancer zodiac energy
cancer zodiac ear piercing
cancer zodiac eyes
cancer zodiac español
cancer zodiac emotionally manipulative
everything about cancer zodiac
evolved cancer zodiac
element of cancer zodiac
evil cancer zodiac
enemy of cancer zodiac
emerald for cancer zodiac
easy cancer zodiac drawing
emotional cancer zodiac
explain cancer zodiac sign
everything you need to know about cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac flower
cancer zodiac flower tattoo
cancer zodiac for today
cancer zodiac female
cancer zodiac favorite color
cancer zodiac famous people
cancer zodiac fire sign
cancer zodiac friends
cancer zodiac facts male
facts about cancer zodiac sign
facts about cancer zodiac woman
fun facts about cancer zodiac
famous cancer zodiac
flower for cancer zodiac
facts about cancer zodiac man
features of cancer zodiac sign
female cancer zodiac sign
friends of cancer zodiac
funny cancer zodiac quotes
cancer zodiac girl
cancer zodiac gemstone
cancer zodiac greek god
cancer zodiac god
cancer zodiac goddess
cancer zodiac gif
cancer zodiac gem
cancer zodiac good and bad traits
cancer zodiac good in bed
cancer zodiac gifts
good things about cancer zodiac
geek bar cancer zodiac flavor
gemstone for cancer zodiac
girl cancer zodiac
gifts for cancer zodiac man
gifts for cancer zodiac woman
gemstone for cancer zodiac sign
girly cancer zodiac tattoo
god of cancer zodiac
gem for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac horoscope today
cancer zodiac horoscope
cancer zodiac health problems
cancer zodiac horoscope 2024
cancer zodiac history
cancer zodiac house
cancer zodiac hand tattoo
cancer zodiac hair color
cancer zodiac hoodie
cancer zodiac humor
how rare is cancer zodiac sign
happy birthday cancer zodiac
how is cancer zodiac sign
how dangerous is cancer zodiac
how to be friends with a cancer zodiac
how will cancer zodiac die
how to deal with cancer zodiac sign
healing crystals for cancer zodiac
habits of cancer zodiac
herbs for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac in hindi
cancer zodiac in chinese
cancer zodiac images
cancer zodiac in telugu
cancer zodiac info
cancer zodiac in spanish
cancer zodiac is what month
cancer zodiac in relationships
cancer zodiac information
cancer zodiac in 2024
is cancer zodiac dangerous
interesting facts about cancer zodiac
is cancer zodiac rare
information about cancer zodiac sign
is cancer zodiac rich or poor
instagram bio for cancer zodiac
images of cancer zodiac sign
is cancer zodiac sign lucky
indian celebrities with cancer zodiac sign
is cancer zodiac a water sign
cancer zodiac jewelry
cancer zodiac jobs
cancer zodiac july
cancer zodiac june
cancer zodiac january 2024
cancer zodiac june 21
cancer zodiac japanese
cancer zodiac july 22
cancer zodiac june 27
cancer zodiac july 16
july cancer zodiac
jobs for cancer zodiac
june cancer zodiac sign
july cancer zodiac traits
jewelry for cancer zodiac
june cancer zodiac personality
june cancer zodiac traits
june vs july cancer zodiac
july birthday cancer zodiac
jade for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac kids
cancer zodiac keywords
cancer zodiac keychain
cancer zodiac kpop idols
cancer zodiac killers
cancer zodiac karma
cancer zodiac know for
cancer zodiac keyboard symbol
cancer zodiac child
cancer zodiac knight
kpop idols cancer zodiac
kpop idols who have cancer zodiac sign
korean actors cancer zodiac
korean celebrities with cancer zodiac sign
katangian ng cancer zodiac
karaang napta cancer zodiac sign
karma cancer zodiac
what kind of person is cancer zodiac sign
things to know about cancer zodiac
everything to know about cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac lucky numbers
cancer zodiac love
cancer zodiac logo
cancer zodiac love language
cancer zodiac lucky colors
cancer zodiac love compatibility
cancer zodiac libra
cancer zodiac lips
cancer zodiac least compatibility
cancer zodiac leo
lucky stone for cancer zodiac sign
logo cancer zodiac
leo and cancer zodiac sign
lucky color for cancer zodiac
lucky wallpaper for cancer zodiac
lucky number for cancer zodiac sign
lunar eclipse effect on cancer zodiac
libra and cancer zodiac sign compatibility
last day of cancer zodiac
love life of cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac meaning
cancer zodiac men
cancer zodiac memes
cancer zodiac match
cancer zodiac month dates
cancer zodiac moon sign
cancer zodiac moon
cancer zodiac meaning male
cancer zodiac meaning female
meaning of cancer zodiac sign
male cancer zodiac
meaningful cancer zodiac tattoo
more about cancer zodiac sign
month of cancer zodiac sign
moonstone for cancer zodiac
month of cancer zodiac
male cancer zodiac tattoo
match for cancer zodiac
mlbb cancer zodiac skin
cancer zodiac necklace
cancer zodiac negative traits
cancer zodiac number
cancer zodiac names
cancer zodiac nails
cancer zodiac nail designs
cancer zodiac nicknames
cancer zodiac necklace gold
cancer zodiac neck tattoo
cancer zodiac necklace silver
nicknames for cancer zodiac
names for cancer zodiac girl
nature of cancer zodiac sign
names for cancer zodiac boy
negatives of cancer zodiac
nature of cancer zodiac
number for cancer zodiac
nba players cancer zodiac
names related to cancer zodiac
next to cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac outfits
cancer zodiac origin
cancer zodiac opposite
cancer zodiac opposite sign
cancer zodiac overview
cancer zodiac of the day
cancer zodiac oc
cancer zodiac origin story
cancer zodiac occupations
cancer zodiac other names
opposite of cancer zodiac
one word to describe cancer zodiac
other names for cancer zodiac
outfits for cancer zodiac sign
opal for cancer zodiac
one piece cancer zodiac
october cancer zodiac
onyx for cancer zodiac
another word for cancer zodiac
ox cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac personality traits
cancer zodiac planet
cancer zodiac personality female
cancer zodiac personality male
cancer zodiac pictures
cancer zodiac powers
cancer zodiac pros and cons
cancer zodiac pendant
cancer zodiac power color
personality of cancer zodiac sign
picture of cancer zodiac sign
pros and cons of cancer zodiac
pictures of cancer zodiac sign girl
planet for cancer zodiac
pisces and cancer zodiac sign
power of cancer zodiac sign
pearl for cancer zodiac
peacock cancer zodiac
perfect match for cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac quotes
cancer zodiac qualities
cancer zodiac quotes funny
cancer zodiac quiz
cancer zodiac questions
cancer zodiac quote of the day
cancer zodiac quiet
cancer zodiac quiz buzzfeed
cancer zodiac quora
cancer zodiac queen
qualities of cancer zodiac sign
qualities of a cancer zodiac
quotes about cancer zodiac
questions to ask a cancer zodiac
quotes for cancer zodiac sign
quiet cancer zodiac
questions for cancer zodiac
questions to ask a cancer zodiac sign
quiz for cancer zodiac
quora cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac reading
cancer zodiac red flags
cancer zodiac reading today
cancer zodiac ruling planet
cancer zodiac rising sign
cancer zodiac relationship
cancer zodiac reddit
cancer zodiac ring
cancer zodiac range
cancer zodiac rappers
ring for cancer zodiac
ruby for cancer zodiac
rabbit cancer zodiac
red flag cancer zodiac
rappers that are cancer zodiac sign
real cancer zodiac facts
rat cancer zodiac
ruling planet of cancer zodiac sign
random facts about cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac sign traits
cancer zodiac sign meaning
cancer zodiac sign month
cancer zodiac stone
cancer zodiac soulmate
cancer zodiac sign compatibility
cancer zodiac sign tattoo
sign of cancer zodiac
stones for cancer zodiac
symbol for cancer zodiac
stone for cancer zodiac sign
symbol of cancer zodiac sign
scary facts about cancer zodiac
serial killers with cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac tattoo ideas
cancer zodiac today
cancer zodiac tattoos for females
cancer zodiac traits female
cancer zodiac traits male
cancer zodiac tattoos for guys
cancer zodiac tarot card
cancer zodiac type
traits of cancer zodiac
things about cancer zodiac sign
tattoo cancer zodiac
types of cancer zodiac
tattoo ideas for cancer zodiac
the meaning of cancer zodiac sign
tattoo cancer zodiac sign
today cancer zodiac
today cancer zodiac sign
today's cancer zodiac horoscope
cancer zodiac urban dictionary
cancer zodiac usernames
cancer zodiac upset
cancer zodiac usa today
cancer zodiac usernames for instagram
cancer zodiac unlucky numbers
cancer zodiac unlucky color
cancer zodiac urdu
cancer zodiac unique facts
cancer zodiac unlucky
unique cancer zodiac tattoos
unique cancer zodiac tattoos for females
ugali ng cancer zodiac sign
understanding cancer zodiac
username for cancer zodiac
urban dictionary cancer zodiac sign
unhealthy cancer zodiac
usa today cancer zodiac
unknown facts about cancer zodiac
unlucky colour for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac virgo
cancer zodiac vape
cancer zodiac vibes
cancer zodiac videos
cancer zodiac vs scorpio
cancer zodiac vs leo
cancer zodiac venus
cancer zodiac vector
cancer zodiac vs gemini
cancer zodiac vindictive
virgo and cancer zodiac sign
vans cancer zodiac
virgo and cancer zodiac
villains cancer zodiac
vintage cancer zodiac
vintage cancer zodiac charm
venus in cancer zodiac
van cleef zodiac pendant cancer
cancer zodiac in vietnamese
cancer zodiac water sign
cancer zodiac weakness
cancer zodiac woman
cancer zodiac wallpaper
cancer zodiac what month
cancer zodiac water or fire
cancer zodiac worst match
cancer zodiac worst traits
cancer zodiac when mad
cancer zodiac wallpaper aesthetic
what is a cancer zodiac
what month is cancer zodiac sign
what month is cancer zodiac
what color is cancer zodiac
weakness of cancer zodiac
what are the traits of a cancer zodiac sign
what is the meaning of cancer zodiac sign
woman cancer zodiac
what is a cancer zodiac animal
what is good about cancer zodiac sign
cancer x zodiac
zodiac cancer x gemini
astrology cancer x capricorn
cancer zodiac letters
cancer x
cancer x cancer zodiac compatibility
cancer x cancer zodiac
zodiak taurus x cancer
what sign are cancer
x cancer
cancer zodiac year 2024
cancer zodiac yin yang
cancer zodiac year
cancer zodiac yin or yang
cancer zodiac yesterday
cancer zodiac year of dragon
what are cancer zodiac signs
year 2024 for cancer zodiac
yin yang cancer zodiac
year of the dragon for cancer zodiac sign
year of cancer zodiac
youtubers with cancer zodiac
year 2023 for cancer zodiac sign
year of the dragon for cancer zodiac
what year is cancer zodiac sign
what does it mean if you are a cancer zodiac
how to know if your a cancer zodiac sign
cancer astrology zone
cancer zodiac pisces zodiac
why are zodiac cancers so dangerous
cancer about zodiac
cancer zodiac in chinese zodiac
cancer zodiac zodiac
cancer sheep zodiac
zodiac cancer characteristics
zodiac cancer celebrities
zodiac cancer child
zodiac cancer chart
cancer horoscope 0800
cancer zodiac july 07
horoscope cancer 09 juin 2023
are cancers good for cancers
are cancers lucky
cancer sun 0 degrees
cancer 0 degrees
what are cancers sign
why are cancers called cancer
why is cancer called cancer zodiac
what represents cancer zodiac
0 degree cancer astrology
0 degree cancer
0 cancer
cancer zodiac 15 year cycle
cancer zodiac 10 things
cancer zodiac 10
cancer zodiac 18k
cancer zodiac 15th birthday
cancer 101 zodiac
zodiac cancer 16
cancer horoscope 19 march 2024
cancer horoscope 13 december 2023
cancer horoscope 11 march 2024
10 bad things about cancer zodiac
10 things about cancer zodiac male
10 things about cancer zodiac female
100 facts about cancer zodiac
10 facts about cancer zodiac
10 good things about cancer zodiac
10 interesting facts about cancer zodiac
10 facts about cancer zodiac sign
14k gold cancer zodiac necklace
cancer zodiac 2024
cancer zodiac 2024 prediction
cancer zodiac 2023
cancer zodiac 2025
cancer zodiac 2024 january
cancer zodiac 2024 career
cancer zodiac 2023 predictions
cancer zodiac 2024 in hindi
cancer zodiac 2024 march
cancer zodiac 2023 horoscope
2024 for cancer zodiac
2 types of cancer zodiac
2025 for cancer zodiac
20 facts about cancer zodiac
2026 for cancer zodiac
2023 for cancer zodiac
2023 cancer zodiac predictions
2024 prediction for cancer zodiac
2024 lucky color for cancer zodiac sign
2024 color of the year for cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac 3 stages
cancer zodiac 3 types
cancer zodiac 3 signs
cancer 3 zodiac
cancer horoscope 31 january 2024
cancer horoscope 30 march 2024
cancer horoscope 31 july 2023
cancer horoscope 30 march 2023
cancer horoscope 30 august 2023
cancer horoscope 30 november 2023
3 types of cancer zodiac
3 stages of cancer zodiac
3 words to describe cancer zodiac
3 facts about cancer zodiac
3 different types of cancer zodiac
3d cancer zodiac sign
3 fun facts about cancer zodiac
august 31 zodiac sign compatibility with cancer
cancer june 30 zodiac sign
cancer zodiac june 30
cancer horoscope 4 march 2024
cancer horoscope 4 april 2024
cancer horoscope 4 may 2023
cancer horoscope 4 january 2024
cancer horoscope 4 october 2023
cancer horoscope 4 april 2023
cancer horoscope 4 september 2023
cancer horoscope 4th december 2023
cancer horoscope 4 july 2023
cancer horoscope 4 june 2023
4 types of cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac wallpaper 4k
cancer zodiac july 4
zodiac sign of cancer 4 letters
what do cancer zodiac sign mean
cancer zodiac rules
4 cancers
zodiac cancer types
cancer horoscope 5 march 2024
cancer horoscope 5 april 2024
cancer horoscope 5 october 2023
cancer horoscope 5 april 2023
cancer horoscope 5 june 2023
cancer horoscope 5 july 2023
cancer horoscope 5 january 2024
cancer horoscope 5 may 2023
cancer horoscope 5 february 2024
cancer horoscope 5 december 2023
5 facts about cancer zodiac
50 cent is a cancer zodiac
50 cent zodiac sign cancer
cancer 5th house zodiac
cancer zodiac sign july 5
cancer zodiac july 5
june 5 zodiac sign cancer
5 cancers
cancer zodiac 69
cancer zodiac 69 tattoo
cancer zodiac 69 meaning
cancer horoscope 6 march 2024
cancer horoscope 6 july 2023
cancer horoscope 6 april 2023
cancer horoscope 6 december 2023
cancer horoscope 6 october 2023
cancer horoscope 6 june 2023
cancer horoscope 6 september 2023
69 cancer zodiac
meaning of cancer zodiac sign 69
cancer zodiac july 6
what does the 69 mean for cancer
cancer born on july 6
cancer big 6 astrology
69 cancer sign
6 cancer causing foods
cancer horoscope 7 march 2024
cancer horoscope 7 may 2023
cancer horoscope 7 september 2023
cancer horoscope 7 july 2023
cancer horoscope 7 june 2023
cancer horoscope 7th may 2023
cancer horoscope 7 november 2023
cancer horoscope 7 august 2023
cancer horoscope 7 april 2023
cancer horoscope 7 february 2024
cancer zodiac july 7
cancer horoscope 8 march 2024
cancer horoscope 8 january 2024
cancer horoscope 8 may 2023
cancer horoscope 8 september 2023
cancer horoscope 8 june 2023
cancer horoscope 8 april 2023
cancer horoscope 8 august 2023
cancer horoscope 8 december 2023
cancer horoscope 8 november 2023
cancer horoscope 8th march 2024
july 8th cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac july 8
signo zodiacal cancer julio 8
what flower represents cancer zodiac
why cancer is dangerous zodiac
what gifts do cancers like
cancer 8h
cancer horoscope 9 june 2023
cancer horoscope 9 may 2023
cancer horoscope 9 march 2024
cancer horoscope 9 january 2024
cancer horoscope 9 april 2023
cancer horoscope 9 october 2023
cancer horoscope 9 september 2023
cancer horoscope 9 november 2023
cancer horoscope 9 august 2023
cancer horoscope 9th april 2023
9 cancer zodiac sign
july 9 zodiac sign cancer
cancer zodiac july 9
what do cancer look like zodiac
what does cancer hate zodiac
9 cancer symptoms
what cancer zodiac sign
what cancer zodiac sign means
2024.05.13 22:50 dc031114 Tuesday 14 May 2024 - Inferno 2G 60 minutes
Inferno! Last time we did this was on the 17th of January. Pretty intense row to run where the goal is get as far as possible in the 23 minute block.
Today's focus is accumulating distance on the rower in an epic row to run.
Row / Tread Block - 23 minutes * Reset your row monitor and set it up for a 23 minute count down * 100m AO row, 160m (0.1 miles) (PW 80m / 0.05 miles) tread * 200m AO row, 160m (0.1 miles) (PW 80m / 0.05 miles) tread * 300m AO row, 160m (0.1 miles) (PW 80m / 0.05 miles) tread * For each subsequent round add 100m to the row (same tread distance), repeat until the finisher: 1 min AO row * Record your total row distance
Floor Block 1 - 8 minutes * Back to back: * 10 total x TRX alligator * 10 x bench chest fly * 10 total x seated reciprocating shoulder press, rest * 12 total x alt low side plank
Floor Block 2 - 8 minutes * Back to back: * 10 x TRX high row to bicep curl * 10 x reverse fly * 10 total x high plank pull through, rest * 12 total x bird dog
Floor Block 3 - 4 minutes back to back superset * 12 x reverse crunch * 12 total x dead bug, rest * Repeat until finisher: 1 minute of either reverse crunch or dead bug at an increased intensity
DC commentary: >! For today’s workout we have Inferno - OTF’s signature workout where you are tracked on your total row distance. Don’t bother signing into the treadmill today as you will need all your logged distance on the rower! \ \ You start on the rower and set it to a 23 minute countdown. Row 100m and hop off (without signing out of the rower) and on to the treadmill. If you are a jogger / runner you will run 160m (power walkers are half distance) before getting off to do the next row round of 200m. Repeat this and continue to add 100m to the distance each round until you get to the last minute where you are doing an all out row. Record your total distance in the challenge tracker and you are done with the most intense part of this template. \ \ A few of the tips I have for the row / run are: \ - Go as fast you can manage on the treadmill - I start at an all out and may have to drop speed a bit on the later rounds but you want to get the treadmill done quickly. \ - Consider doing this benchmark as a power walker if you are a jogger or on the border line of runner - you can probably power walk half the runner distance faster than you can run it. Obviously if you are tracking for consistency and you have always run it then continue to do so. \ - You can save a bit of time by not fiddling with the foot straps on the rower. I keep them snug but don’t bother tightening them for the row so I can just slip them in and out. \ - If you have the fancy rowers with tablets don't log into the treadmill tablet as you want to keep the rower logged in. I don't really bother logging into the treadmill at all as it just takes time away from your rower. \ - As you reach your row distance goal each round, give the handle a big pull as the distance will keep accumulating as you hop off and get back to the run. \ \ No PR today - I had Mrs DC’s birthday dinner last night so a bit of 🍷 probably got between me and a PR but still happy with 4527m. To be honest, having done this one a few times now I am just happy with being reasonably consistent rather than trying to kill myself for a leaderboard mention. We have a few folk in our studio that can crush over 5000m so I am pretty far off those distances! \ \ The floor work is either prep work for the row to run or a bit of a cool down to be honest. Three blocks - first two uses weights and the TRX strap and the last block is a core blast. I went a bit lighter as I was toast after the row to run. No lunges but we do have some shoulder presses today. \ \ This is a tough challenge and will test your rowing capacity. Inferno is an automatic a 1 (🪶) out of 5 for gentleness. !<
submitted by dc031114 to orangetheory [link] [comments]
Today's focus is accumulating distance on the rower in an epic row to run.
Row / Tread Block - 23 minutes * Reset your row monitor and set it up for a 23 minute count down * 100m AO row, 160m (0.1 miles) (PW 80m / 0.05 miles) tread * 200m AO row, 160m (0.1 miles) (PW 80m / 0.05 miles) tread * 300m AO row, 160m (0.1 miles) (PW 80m / 0.05 miles) tread * For each subsequent round add 100m to the row (same tread distance), repeat until the finisher: 1 min AO row * Record your total row distance
Floor Block 1 - 8 minutes * Back to back: * 10 total x TRX alligator * 10 x bench chest fly * 10 total x seated reciprocating shoulder press, rest * 12 total x alt low side plank
Floor Block 2 - 8 minutes * Back to back: * 10 x TRX high row to bicep curl * 10 x reverse fly * 10 total x high plank pull through, rest * 12 total x bird dog
Floor Block 3 - 4 minutes back to back superset * 12 x reverse crunch * 12 total x dead bug, rest * Repeat until finisher: 1 minute of either reverse crunch or dead bug at an increased intensity
DC commentary: >! For today’s workout we have Inferno - OTF’s signature workout where you are tracked on your total row distance. Don’t bother signing into the treadmill today as you will need all your logged distance on the rower! \ \ You start on the rower and set it to a 23 minute countdown. Row 100m and hop off (without signing out of the rower) and on to the treadmill. If you are a jogger / runner you will run 160m (power walkers are half distance) before getting off to do the next row round of 200m. Repeat this and continue to add 100m to the distance each round until you get to the last minute where you are doing an all out row. Record your total distance in the challenge tracker and you are done with the most intense part of this template. \ \ A few of the tips I have for the row / run are: \ - Go as fast you can manage on the treadmill - I start at an all out and may have to drop speed a bit on the later rounds but you want to get the treadmill done quickly. \ - Consider doing this benchmark as a power walker if you are a jogger or on the border line of runner - you can probably power walk half the runner distance faster than you can run it. Obviously if you are tracking for consistency and you have always run it then continue to do so. \ - You can save a bit of time by not fiddling with the foot straps on the rower. I keep them snug but don’t bother tightening them for the row so I can just slip them in and out. \ - If you have the fancy rowers with tablets don't log into the treadmill tablet as you want to keep the rower logged in. I don't really bother logging into the treadmill at all as it just takes time away from your rower. \ - As you reach your row distance goal each round, give the handle a big pull as the distance will keep accumulating as you hop off and get back to the run. \ \ No PR today - I had Mrs DC’s birthday dinner last night so a bit of 🍷 probably got between me and a PR but still happy with 4527m. To be honest, having done this one a few times now I am just happy with being reasonably consistent rather than trying to kill myself for a leaderboard mention. We have a few folk in our studio that can crush over 5000m so I am pretty far off those distances! \ \ The floor work is either prep work for the row to run or a bit of a cool down to be honest. Three blocks - first two uses weights and the TRX strap and the last block is a core blast. I went a bit lighter as I was toast after the row to run. No lunges but we do have some shoulder presses today. \ \ This is a tough challenge and will test your rowing capacity. Inferno is an automatic a 1 (🪶) out of 5 for gentleness. !<
2024.05.13 22:47 Primary_Cantaloupe51 I didn't wish MIL a Happy Mother's Day this year and I don't feel guilty
For context, the woman is just awful to me. I spent 5+ years trying to bend over backwards, doing whatever she wanted because I wanted her to like me and I was a major people pleaser. I set my first boundary when I had my first baby a year and a half ago, and from then on, she was very open about how much she hated me to my husband and everyone who would listen, which was so hurtful because at the time, I truly thought she actually loved me and it was a gut punch to have that realization that she never did, and to find out she'd actually talked badly about me behind my back the entire time. She had always said and done stuff to hurt my feelings and she was mean to me quite often but I stupidly thought she still loved me, because I wanted to have loving in-laws. I never got over how she could treat me so horribly while I was in the middle of labor with zero disregard of my feelings or the fact that I was trying to focus on having a healthy and stress free birth - but it only got worse from there.
It got to the point where me and LO were NC for 10 months. After working with a couples therapist to get on the same page, me and DH agreed to let MIL & FIL finally visit our house to see LO 3 weeks ago. They have given us the silent treatment since their visit because I'm sure "they're upset about something I did wrong", and to me that just confirms that they're not ever going to change because I was very courteous and nice to them and my DH agrees that we did nothing that should've made them upset or offended. I had absolutely no hope that they would change but my husband did, but now he is finally seeing that they are incapable of being mature and respectable adults.
Anyway, with the recommendation of our couples therapist, my husband sent her a Mother's Day card signed from only himself last week and on Saturday she texted him, "wow, what a lovely surprise. Thanks for the card". The therapist's thought behind it was that if DH didn't say anything, I would be blamed (which is true) and would add fuel to the fire. I was going back and forth on whether or not I'd say anything back if she wished me a Happy Mother's Day yesterday but she didn't say anything at all. I wish it didn't bother me but it does. I shouldn't be surprised since she has never wished me a Happy Mother's Day before. In fact, my first Mother's Day when I was pregnant in my first trimester, she told me "it didn't count because I wasn't a Mom yet". (Fully disagree, but okayyyy. Just an example of how rude she is.) She didn't wish me one last year either, even though I wished her one.
Yesterday afternoon, my DH was like, "maybe you should wish her a Happy Mother's Day so it doesn't give her another reason to be mad." I just had to be real with him. I don't care if she's mad. I don't want to be inauthentic and fake and wish her a Happy Mother's Day because she does not deserve one from me. I'm not trying to be mean or cruel or petty. I just really did not want to. MIL is not my mom. I already have a Mom, someone who is actually nice to me and loves me and cares about me, respects my boundaries and who gave birth to me. Side note: MIL also ruined my last 2 Mother's Days with major guilt trips and saying mean things about me because I wanted to celebrate with my husband and child.
MIL has never been "motherly" to me. She has spent 6+ years making my life a living hell, talking shit about me when she doesn't get her way, screaming at me while I was in labor and calling me names because we didn't want visitors right away and it was "my fault because I'm controlling and baby hogging my literal newborn baby", and being passive aggressive/telling me all the things I was doing wrong as a new mom/how I wasn't breastfeeding right/criticizing me/leaving me voicemails about how I could do better, and be more like she was when she was a new mom/etc. Not to mention she has made fun of me in front of my child for having anxiety and OCD. She turned the whole family against me because I put up boundaries and she lost control of our lives. She has only said mean things about me since my son was born and she continues to be rude and disrespectful to me. Why on earth would I want to wish her a Happy Mother's Day?! I certainly don't wish that she had a bad Mother's Day or anything, but I'm not kissing her ass anymore. I stopped doing that the moment she crossed the line with her outrageous behavior when I was in labor. And I'm not going to do something to appease her, just to feed her ego. No thank you.
My husband said he completely understood and doesn't blame me at all. Don't hate on him, it was just a suggestion. He's 100% on my side and he's actually pretty pissed that she didn't bother to wish me a Happy Mother's Day. But to me, she's just showing him who she is more and more. Sooo can I go back to NC now? haha!
I am sure she is going to have something nasty to say about me not wishing her a Happy Mother's Day and I'm thankful my husband will back me up and is on the same page with me and is planning on telling her off about the silent treatment and how we are not tolerating her crap anymore anyway. The saga continues this week. Ugh. I wish I could just let it go and not think about it but unfortunately with OCD, unpleasant things tend to have a way of playing back in my head over and over. It's annoying lol.
submitted by Primary_Cantaloupe51 to JUSTNOMIL [link] [comments]
It got to the point where me and LO were NC for 10 months. After working with a couples therapist to get on the same page, me and DH agreed to let MIL & FIL finally visit our house to see LO 3 weeks ago. They have given us the silent treatment since their visit because I'm sure "they're upset about something I did wrong", and to me that just confirms that they're not ever going to change because I was very courteous and nice to them and my DH agrees that we did nothing that should've made them upset or offended. I had absolutely no hope that they would change but my husband did, but now he is finally seeing that they are incapable of being mature and respectable adults.
Anyway, with the recommendation of our couples therapist, my husband sent her a Mother's Day card signed from only himself last week and on Saturday she texted him, "wow, what a lovely surprise. Thanks for the card". The therapist's thought behind it was that if DH didn't say anything, I would be blamed (which is true) and would add fuel to the fire. I was going back and forth on whether or not I'd say anything back if she wished me a Happy Mother's Day yesterday but she didn't say anything at all. I wish it didn't bother me but it does. I shouldn't be surprised since she has never wished me a Happy Mother's Day before. In fact, my first Mother's Day when I was pregnant in my first trimester, she told me "it didn't count because I wasn't a Mom yet". (Fully disagree, but okayyyy. Just an example of how rude she is.) She didn't wish me one last year either, even though I wished her one.
Yesterday afternoon, my DH was like, "maybe you should wish her a Happy Mother's Day so it doesn't give her another reason to be mad." I just had to be real with him. I don't care if she's mad. I don't want to be inauthentic and fake and wish her a Happy Mother's Day because she does not deserve one from me. I'm not trying to be mean or cruel or petty. I just really did not want to. MIL is not my mom. I already have a Mom, someone who is actually nice to me and loves me and cares about me, respects my boundaries and who gave birth to me. Side note: MIL also ruined my last 2 Mother's Days with major guilt trips and saying mean things about me because I wanted to celebrate with my husband and child.
MIL has never been "motherly" to me. She has spent 6+ years making my life a living hell, talking shit about me when she doesn't get her way, screaming at me while I was in labor and calling me names because we didn't want visitors right away and it was "my fault because I'm controlling and baby hogging my literal newborn baby", and being passive aggressive/telling me all the things I was doing wrong as a new mom/how I wasn't breastfeeding right/criticizing me/leaving me voicemails about how I could do better, and be more like she was when she was a new mom/etc. Not to mention she has made fun of me in front of my child for having anxiety and OCD. She turned the whole family against me because I put up boundaries and she lost control of our lives. She has only said mean things about me since my son was born and she continues to be rude and disrespectful to me. Why on earth would I want to wish her a Happy Mother's Day?! I certainly don't wish that she had a bad Mother's Day or anything, but I'm not kissing her ass anymore. I stopped doing that the moment she crossed the line with her outrageous behavior when I was in labor. And I'm not going to do something to appease her, just to feed her ego. No thank you.
My husband said he completely understood and doesn't blame me at all. Don't hate on him, it was just a suggestion. He's 100% on my side and he's actually pretty pissed that she didn't bother to wish me a Happy Mother's Day. But to me, she's just showing him who she is more and more. Sooo can I go back to NC now? haha!
I am sure she is going to have something nasty to say about me not wishing her a Happy Mother's Day and I'm thankful my husband will back me up and is on the same page with me and is planning on telling her off about the silent treatment and how we are not tolerating her crap anymore anyway. The saga continues this week. Ugh. I wish I could just let it go and not think about it but unfortunately with OCD, unpleasant things tend to have a way of playing back in my head over and over. It's annoying lol.
2024.05.13 22:47 seastormybear My covert n-mom wrote me a poem
It was my Covert Narcissistic mother’s birthday. So I sent her a quick email, “Happy Birthday, Mom! 😁🎉🎂” So she wouldn’t came after me about missing her birthday. She replied right away with this poem??, that she wrote me. Here it is….
Do you ne'r tire of the drama
Of the in-ness and the out-ness
the on and the off?
Does your soul not be weary
Your spirit sad
Your hope shatter
Your joy become ever elusive?
When comes the time
To stop
To forget
To live the joy of now
Is there possibility
Or
Is there only pain?
submitted by seastormybear to narcissisticparents [link] [comments]
Do you ne'r tire of the drama
Of the in-ness and the out-ness
the on and the off?
Does your soul not be weary
Your spirit sad
Your hope shatter
Your joy become ever elusive?
When comes the time
To stop
To forget
To live the joy of now
Is there possibility
Or
Is there only pain?
2024.05.13 22:46 taitaigarvin Love Spells that Work Instantly ((+256755470380)) Love Spells that Work in 24 hours love spells that work immediately without ingredients All Countries 100%% Can love spells work Overnight?? Which free love spells can work in 24 hours? Casting a Spell on Someone to Make This Person Love You
lost love spells in Australia-Best Love Spells That Work Fast & Easy 2024 are among others lost love spells in Usa cast online and in-store to bring back lost love spells in #24 hours!! simply email (intclairvoyant@gmail.com) Call/WhatsApp: +256755470380 return lost love spells even after all other spell casters have failed!! What are you waiting for?? lost love spells caster in Johannesburg https://powerfulspellspsychic.wordpress.com/ free lost love spells-"Allure Astrology," learn how casting ethical love spells is the perfect way to invite more positive energy into your relationship goals...lost love spells in Uganda. .lost love spells in south Africa lost love spells in Paris France //+256755470380// lost love spells in Singapore -lost love spells in USA lost love spells in Paris- love spells results in #24 hours
black magic lost love spell caster in Uganda +256755470380 how to restore with lost love spells@ Lithuania, India, China, Cuba, Uruguay, Turkey, Maldives, Malta, Mexico, Morocco, Milan, Mali, Malawi, Mozambique, Mongolia, Thailand, Singapore, Russia, Ukraine, Israel, Oman, Yemen, Sudan, Kenya, Chad, Nigeria, Senegal, Ivory coast, Cameroun, Togo, Ghana, Uganda, Tanzania, Zimbabwe, Zambia, Botswana, Namibia, Belize, Jamaica, Brazil, Seychelles, Mauritius 100% guaranteed results mudi spell homes WhatsApp +256755470380
love spell$ Online Best love spell decanter֍+256755470380 (MD , USA ) yet stimulating Love Spells IN Bridgeport CT, Baltimore, MD. 1.֍Get back Ex lover. get your Ex back https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/
★ how to reuniting with lovers and make him or her- how to bring lost lover back my powerful bring back in Barbados, Saint Lucia, Palau Andora Tonga Dominica Bahrain Antigua and Barbuda Marshal Monaco Tuvalu Vatican City Nauru Liechtenstein Luxembourg Comoros Sao Tome and Principe Kiribati Samoa Cape Verde Trinidad and Tobago Brunei Cyprus Lebanon Qatar Vanuatu The Bahamas Eswatini Fiji Slovenia Kuwait El-Salvado Djibouti North Macedonia Haiti Burundi Equatorial Guinea Albania Solomon Islands Armenia Lesotho Belgium Moldova Estonia Costa Rica
lost love spells in Washington-We dug into the rich history of love magic to help you wrap your head around how it all works- Powerful Spell To Make Someone Love You((+256755470380 where to Find a spell to make someone love you or specific spells to bring ex back! // lost love spells in usa // lost love spells caster in New York // lost love spells in new york // lost love spells caster in Canada https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/
lost love spells in Uk- Powerful Instant Best Love Spells©╬⓿ ☎(+256755470380) U.S.A, U.K, Australia, Singapore, Canada, South Africa, Uganda, Norway, Guam, Grenada, Switzerland, Sweden, Austria&))))
lost love spells in Texas //lost love spells in Norway- How to Make Someone Fall in Love with You//lost love spells in boston // lost love spells in dallas // lost love spells in london // are lost love spells caster in johannesburg cheap??
You are not recommended to try spells to bring a lover back if you are going through the following: You know that your relationship with your ex is toxic and the best painful option to take in this is to move on. It is not a good choice to be in a relationship that is un-natural, one that is built on witchcraft. The love spark as to be their at all times.
Even the most powerful love spell may not fulfill the things that are required for a real relationship to be in place. Love should be natural and if your partner looses interest in you, its better that you let them follow the heart. If one door closes, expect another open infront of you.
Therefore witchcraft or love spells should not be the ultimate solution to mending a broken heart in a relationship, one has to make love exist naturally by doing the right things to your partner, the things that will recapture the inner feelings of love and affection as you did in the start of the relationship.
Only if and when all has been tried and failed to work that one should order for my love spells that actually work, and indeed this will be the last nail in the coffin to fix your troubled relationship permanently.
asmr ariana grande avengers endgame ace family act up apex legends abc song aladdin 2024 ali a avengers endgame trailer amazon amazon prime https://lostlovespellz.wordpress.com/ american airlines airbnb aol mail amtrak apple abcya autozone aol airpods amazon gift cards aa batteries airpod case aaa batteries apple watch band 38mm air fryer apple watch apple watch band 42mm alexa american express accuweather bank of america best buy bryce harper bed bath and beyond billie eilish bitcoin barnes and noble Bosnia Herzegovina Georgia Ireland Sierra leone Brazil Benin Eritrea Honduras Liberia Bulgaria Guatemala South Korea Iceland Hungary Portugal Serbia United Arab Emirates Azerbaijan Serbia Panama Algeria Argentina Kazakhastan bing bb&t bloomingdales bluetooth headphones bluetooth earbuds baby wipes bluetooth headsets bluetooth speakers blood pressure monitor biotin bath bombs blender bubble wrap big lots bbc news britney spears bass pro shop belk baby shark blueface bts bill nye planet on fire blackpink bad bunny bye sister tati bruno mars bohemian rhapsody cardi b cocomelon city girls coryxkenshin ceeday cj so cool chris brown country music clout offset cardi b captain marvel craigslist chase costco capital one cnn cool math games credit karma calculator cvs comcast compression socks women cat litter collagen powder coconut oil condoms coffee grinder creatine crocs women can opener cbd oil craigslist dc chernobyl dry erase markers digital photo frame dog treats dishwasher pods dog bed dog toys diffusers for essential oils https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/ dog harness dish soap dry shampoo david dobrik dolan twins drake shaman in uk da baby astrologer despacito dude perfect danielle cohn dantdm ddg darius garland doris day dominos dow jones dictionary detective pikachu dsw doordash dollar tree draft lottery 2024 docs delta airlines discover card login discord domino's pizza drudge report delta driving directions dropbox earbuds essential oils echo dot electric toothbrush extension cord essential oil diffuser external hard drive ear plugs earphones epsom salt ebay espn expedia etsy easter 2025 english to spanish enterprise elizabeth holmes emilia clarke epic games earth emma chamberlain eminem envy me endgame trailer ed sheeran ellen ella mai elmo email edible arrangements ebates enterprise car rental ebay motorsfacebook flights fox news food near me fortnite fashion nova fandango fedex forever 21 fedex tracking fire stick flowers for delivery prime fitbit fitbit charge 2 bands flowers fitbit versa bands food scale fan foam roller fanny pack funny videos fgteev future faze rug funnymike frozen 2 fearless flamingo faucet failure facebook log in to facebook friv facebook search frontier airlines fidelity gift cards for amazon gift card graduation party supplies 2019 gift cards for amazon birthday game of thrones merchandise grandma gifts gaming chair graduation gifts for her garden hose gel nail polish google gmail google translate google maps google classroom google docs game of thrones google flights google drive google slides gabriel zamora gacha life gods country gunna ghost recon breakpoint gypsy rose blancharde gummy bear song genius game grumps google search groupon home depot hotmail hulu harris teeter h&m hobby lobby harbor freight https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/ hbo go hbo h&r block happier horses in the back halsey homicide logic happy birthday song high hopes hindi songs hit or miss hey julie h3h3 hdmi cable headphones hydro flask hummingbird feeder hangers hammock heating pad hand soap high waisted swimsuit howard stern comes again hsn hotels huffington post happy birthday it chapter 2 trailer i got the horses in the back imagine dragons i dont care ed sheeran iggy azalea itsfunneh i like it cardi b inside edition inquisitormaster i think moto moto likes you instagram indeed ikea iran ixl ihop icloud irs imdb iphone xr iphone charger iphone xr cases iphone 8 plus case iphone xr screen protector iphone xs max case iphone 7 case iphone x case iphone 8 case iphone 7 plus case iphone 6s case itunes illinois lottery images jcpenney jetblue jennifer aniston joann fabrics juegos friv jimmy john's menu jennifer lopez justice jeep jcp jumpsuits for women jojoba oil jump rope jewelry organizer jade roller jewelry cleaner journal juicer juul charger jewelry box james charles jeffree star jake paul james charles apology juice wrld joe vs james charles joe rogan jeffy jojo siwa j cole jordyn woods john wick 3 ja morant john durham jussie smollett jobs near me jimmy johns jeff bezos keto pills kindle fire kindle paperwhite e-reader keto snacks keto knee brace knife sharpener ketone strips keurig coffee maker kleenex tissues kohl's kahoot kayak kroger kim kardashian khan academy kelley blue book katy perry kizi kylie jenner kohls kevin durant keto diet kamala harris kings dominion keanu reeves kaiser permanente kodak black kevin gates kawhi leonard game winner khalid kids videos for kids kane brown kid cudi playboi carti kendrick lamar ksi lightning cable lingerie for women lol surprise dolls led strip lights laptop lg stylo 4 phone case laundry detergent effective sex love spells that really work how to cast an african love spell to get ex back how to cast an attraction love spell with candles how to cast black magic love spell with blood powerful witchcraft spells for love that work fast most effective witchcraft spells for love how to cast a beauty love spell strong effective sex love spells that really work powerful love spells in surrey, Buckinghamshire and Hertfordshire U.K liquid laundry basket lavender essential oil luggage tags linkedin lowe's home improvement lululemon louis vuitton lands end lord and taylor lady gaga lane bryant little caesars lexus lil baby logan paul lazarbeam lil nas x old town road lachlan lia marie johnson lil wayne lil uzi vert lil pump lil durk lowes lakers loft lebron james labcorp lindsey graham mothers day gifts for mom from daughter mothers day gifts for wife metal straws mothers day card micro sd card mouse pad maxi dresses for women makeup brush set mothers day flowers for delivery prime only mct oil murders on my mind music mrbeast maleficent 2 mo bamba marshmallow michael jackson middle child markiplier memes msn mapquest maps menards macy's mail mega millions winning numbers minecraft michaels mapquest driving directions macys momo mcdonalds march madness mega millions mlb scores nba youngboy nipsey hussle ninja nikita dragun nle choppa nicki minaj nelk nba draft lottery nba lottery 2019 nikocado avocado nba nba draft netflix nba lottery news https://lostlovespellz.wordpress.com/ nba playoffs nordstrom nba scores nba mock draft nintendo switch nespresso capsules nose hair trimmer no show socks women nintendo switch games nursing bra nintendo switch case nail clippers nespresso vertuoline pods night light nascar nike new york times neiman marcus national weather service old town road old town road billy ray cyrus olivia jade one punch man season 2 episode 6 ozuna old town road lil nas x lyrics offset oneplus 7 oneplus 7 pro ocean eyes outlook old navy office depot office 365 overstock orbitz olive garden olx oriental trading omegle opm outback oral b replacement brush heads one piece swimsuits for women office chair oh the places you'll go by dr. seuss oil diffuser outdoor rug ovulation test strips oculus quest outdoor string lights oral b electric toothbrush paper towels pop socket psn card digital code portable charger packing tape playstation card ps4 controller paper plates pregnancy test protein powder pinterest paypal pandora prodigy pizza hut powerball winning numbers pnc bank party city pottery barn petsmart powerball papa johns panera popeyes pooh pathology test arsenal pewdiepie pewdiepie vs t series peppa pig please me bruno mars post malone pop out projared paw patrol polo g panic at the disco queen quando rondo queen naija queen live aid 1985 full concert quin nfn qka ka shpija quavo quran tilawat quadeca queen don't stop me now qvc quizlet quest diagnostics quickbooks qvc shopping online quotes quill queen elizabeth qatar airways queen sheets q tips quest bars queen bed frame queen mattress qtips cotton swabs quest protein chips queen mattress protector qtips queen comforter set quizlet live quizizz quadratic formula quick draw roblox realtor restaurants redbox reverse phone lookup reddit rotten tomatoes royal caribbean rei regal cinemas redfin restaurants near me r kelly rj barrett ashida tlaib run 3 ryan's toy review robbery juice wrld rihanna rebecca zamolo r kelly interview roddy ricch rage 2 review ricegum reusable straws roku ring doorbell resistance bands ring light roku streaming stick rompers for women revlon one step hair dryer and styler rice cooker reusable produce bags southwest seth curry spotify https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/ spanish to english staples safeway snake steph curry starbucks solitaire shane dawson songs sunflower post malone soph slime snl sicko mode shallow lady gaga ssundee sonic the hedgehog movie southwest airlines sam's club sears soundcloud shutterfly social security spirit airlines shower curtain shower curtain liner scale shoe rack summer dresses for women scrunchies for hair scrunchies swimsuits for women spray bottle sunglasses for women tim conway translate target twitter turbotax ted bundy trump tulsi gabbard thesaurus ticketmaster toilet paper teacher appreciation gifts https://lostlovespellz.wordpress.com/ toothpaste tea tree oil teeth whitening tide pods trash bags thank you cards tapestry travel accessories tati t series tana mongeau trisha paytas tati and james charles drama thotiana blueface tim conway dentist taki taki try not to laugh tim conway elephant travelocity traductor tractor supply tmz twitch tripadvisor us trailer undisputed upchurch us unspeakable usher ufc unthinkable smiley unspeakablegaming un poco loco usb c cable umbrella usb flash drive usb hub unicorn gifts unicorn party supplies usb extension cable usb wall charger uber gift card unicorn united airlines usps ups tracking usaa ulta uber usa today urban dictionary us map united usps tracking uber stock us movie uber eats usa jobs erizon wireless verizon vrbo victoria's secret vanguard Casting a Spell on Someone to Make This Person Love You https://sheikhabdulkarimspellscaster.wordpress.com/ vistaprint vans venus vimeo vera bradley vitamin d vacuum cleaner vitamin c serum vitamin c visa gift card vitamin e oil velcro strips with adhesive vital proteins collagen peptides vitamin d3 vape pen vines vanossgaming vy qwaint venom vice veronica wang vicente fernandez vamos pa la playa valuable pain vines that keep me from ending it all verizon fios venezuela virginia tech dmv weather walmart warriors washington post wayfair weather dc wells fargo walgreens washington gas washington capitals whatsapp web white pages wikipedia webmd weight watchers wireless earbuds wireless headphones water bottle waist trainer wireless mouse womens tops weighted blanket where the crawdads sing waterpik wireless charger wwe worth it wow post malone without me halsey without me wild n out wheels on the bus wow wrong wiz khalifa https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/
https://sheikhabdulkarimspellscaster.wordpress.com/
https://lostlovespellz.wordpress.com/
love spells that work instantly love spells that work in 24 hours love spells that work immediately love spells that work immediately without ingredients love spells that work immediately free love spells that work in 24 hours free love spells that work in minutes love spells that work instantly free binding love spells that work fast binding love spells that work fast free best love spells that work love spells that simple work for beginners best love spells that work free free love spells that work instantly for beginners free love spells that work instantly for beginners without ingredients love spells that work overnight free love spells that work overnight free love spells that work overnight without ingredients simple love spells that work overnight
Email: [intclairvoyant@gmail.com](mailto:intclairvoyant@gmail.com) [spellsherb22@gmail.com](mailto:spellsherb22@gmail.com)
submitted by taitaigarvin to blackmagicspelling [link] [comments]
black magic lost love spell caster in Uganda +256755470380 how to restore with lost love spells@ Lithuania, India, China, Cuba, Uruguay, Turkey, Maldives, Malta, Mexico, Morocco, Milan, Mali, Malawi, Mozambique, Mongolia, Thailand, Singapore, Russia, Ukraine, Israel, Oman, Yemen, Sudan, Kenya, Chad, Nigeria, Senegal, Ivory coast, Cameroun, Togo, Ghana, Uganda, Tanzania, Zimbabwe, Zambia, Botswana, Namibia, Belize, Jamaica, Brazil, Seychelles, Mauritius 100% guaranteed results mudi spell homes WhatsApp +256755470380
love spell$ Online Best love spell decanter֍+256755470380 (MD , USA ) yet stimulating Love Spells IN Bridgeport CT, Baltimore, MD. 1.֍Get back Ex lover. get your Ex back https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/
★ how to reuniting with lovers and make him or her- how to bring lost lover back my powerful bring back in Barbados, Saint Lucia, Palau Andora Tonga Dominica Bahrain Antigua and Barbuda Marshal Monaco Tuvalu Vatican City Nauru Liechtenstein Luxembourg Comoros Sao Tome and Principe Kiribati Samoa Cape Verde Trinidad and Tobago Brunei Cyprus Lebanon Qatar Vanuatu The Bahamas Eswatini Fiji Slovenia Kuwait El-Salvado Djibouti North Macedonia Haiti Burundi Equatorial Guinea Albania Solomon Islands Armenia Lesotho Belgium Moldova Estonia Costa Rica
lost love spells in Washington-We dug into the rich history of love magic to help you wrap your head around how it all works- Powerful Spell To Make Someone Love You((+256755470380 where to Find a spell to make someone love you or specific spells to bring ex back! // lost love spells in usa // lost love spells caster in New York // lost love spells in new york // lost love spells caster in Canada https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/
lost love spells in Uk- Powerful Instant Best Love Spells©╬⓿ ☎(+256755470380) U.S.A, U.K, Australia, Singapore, Canada, South Africa, Uganda, Norway, Guam, Grenada, Switzerland, Sweden, Austria&))))
lost love spells in Texas //lost love spells in Norway- How to Make Someone Fall in Love with You//lost love spells in boston // lost love spells in dallas // lost love spells in london // are lost love spells caster in johannesburg cheap??
You are not recommended to try spells to bring a lover back if you are going through the following: You know that your relationship with your ex is toxic and the best painful option to take in this is to move on. It is not a good choice to be in a relationship that is un-natural, one that is built on witchcraft. The love spark as to be their at all times.
Even the most powerful love spell may not fulfill the things that are required for a real relationship to be in place. Love should be natural and if your partner looses interest in you, its better that you let them follow the heart. If one door closes, expect another open infront of you.
Therefore witchcraft or love spells should not be the ultimate solution to mending a broken heart in a relationship, one has to make love exist naturally by doing the right things to your partner, the things that will recapture the inner feelings of love and affection as you did in the start of the relationship.
Only if and when all has been tried and failed to work that one should order for my love spells that actually work, and indeed this will be the last nail in the coffin to fix your troubled relationship permanently.
asmr ariana grande avengers endgame ace family act up apex legends abc song aladdin 2024 ali a avengers endgame trailer amazon amazon prime https://lostlovespellz.wordpress.com/ american airlines airbnb aol mail amtrak apple abcya autozone aol airpods amazon gift cards aa batteries airpod case aaa batteries apple watch band 38mm air fryer apple watch apple watch band 42mm alexa american express accuweather bank of america best buy bryce harper bed bath and beyond billie eilish bitcoin barnes and noble Bosnia Herzegovina Georgia Ireland Sierra leone Brazil Benin Eritrea Honduras Liberia Bulgaria Guatemala South Korea Iceland Hungary Portugal Serbia United Arab Emirates Azerbaijan Serbia Panama Algeria Argentina Kazakhastan bing bb&t bloomingdales bluetooth headphones bluetooth earbuds baby wipes bluetooth headsets bluetooth speakers blood pressure monitor biotin bath bombs blender bubble wrap big lots bbc news britney spears bass pro shop belk baby shark blueface bts bill nye planet on fire blackpink bad bunny bye sister tati bruno mars bohemian rhapsody cardi b cocomelon city girls coryxkenshin ceeday cj so cool chris brown country music clout offset cardi b captain marvel craigslist chase costco capital one cnn cool math games credit karma calculator cvs comcast compression socks women cat litter collagen powder coconut oil condoms coffee grinder creatine crocs women can opener cbd oil craigslist dc chernobyl dry erase markers digital photo frame dog treats dishwasher pods dog bed dog toys diffusers for essential oils https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/ dog harness dish soap dry shampoo david dobrik dolan twins drake shaman in uk da baby astrologer despacito dude perfect danielle cohn dantdm ddg darius garland doris day dominos dow jones dictionary detective pikachu dsw doordash dollar tree draft lottery 2024 docs delta airlines discover card login discord domino's pizza drudge report delta driving directions dropbox earbuds essential oils echo dot electric toothbrush extension cord essential oil diffuser external hard drive ear plugs earphones epsom salt ebay espn expedia etsy easter 2025 english to spanish enterprise elizabeth holmes emilia clarke epic games earth emma chamberlain eminem envy me endgame trailer ed sheeran ellen ella mai elmo email edible arrangements ebates enterprise car rental ebay motorsfacebook flights fox news food near me fortnite fashion nova fandango fedex forever 21 fedex tracking fire stick flowers for delivery prime fitbit fitbit charge 2 bands flowers fitbit versa bands food scale fan foam roller fanny pack funny videos fgteev future faze rug funnymike frozen 2 fearless flamingo faucet failure facebook log in to facebook friv facebook search frontier airlines fidelity gift cards for amazon gift card graduation party supplies 2019 gift cards for amazon birthday game of thrones merchandise grandma gifts gaming chair graduation gifts for her garden hose gel nail polish google gmail google translate google maps google classroom google docs game of thrones google flights google drive google slides gabriel zamora gacha life gods country gunna ghost recon breakpoint gypsy rose blancharde gummy bear song genius game grumps google search groupon home depot hotmail hulu harris teeter h&m hobby lobby harbor freight https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/ hbo go hbo h&r block happier horses in the back halsey homicide logic happy birthday song high hopes hindi songs hit or miss hey julie h3h3 hdmi cable headphones hydro flask hummingbird feeder hangers hammock heating pad hand soap high waisted swimsuit howard stern comes again hsn hotels huffington post happy birthday it chapter 2 trailer i got the horses in the back imagine dragons i dont care ed sheeran iggy azalea itsfunneh i like it cardi b inside edition inquisitormaster i think moto moto likes you instagram indeed ikea iran ixl ihop icloud irs imdb iphone xr iphone charger iphone xr cases iphone 8 plus case iphone xr screen protector iphone xs max case iphone 7 case iphone x case iphone 8 case iphone 7 plus case iphone 6s case itunes illinois lottery images jcpenney jetblue jennifer aniston joann fabrics juegos friv jimmy john's menu jennifer lopez justice jeep jcp jumpsuits for women jojoba oil jump rope jewelry organizer jade roller jewelry cleaner journal juicer juul charger jewelry box james charles jeffree star jake paul james charles apology juice wrld joe vs james charles joe rogan jeffy jojo siwa j cole jordyn woods john wick 3 ja morant john durham jussie smollett jobs near me jimmy johns jeff bezos keto pills kindle fire kindle paperwhite e-reader keto snacks keto knee brace knife sharpener ketone strips keurig coffee maker kleenex tissues kohl's kahoot kayak kroger kim kardashian khan academy kelley blue book katy perry kizi kylie jenner kohls kevin durant keto diet kamala harris kings dominion keanu reeves kaiser permanente kodak black kevin gates kawhi leonard game winner khalid kids videos for kids kane brown kid cudi playboi carti kendrick lamar ksi lightning cable lingerie for women lol surprise dolls led strip lights laptop lg stylo 4 phone case laundry detergent effective sex love spells that really work how to cast an african love spell to get ex back how to cast an attraction love spell with candles how to cast black magic love spell with blood powerful witchcraft spells for love that work fast most effective witchcraft spells for love how to cast a beauty love spell strong effective sex love spells that really work powerful love spells in surrey, Buckinghamshire and Hertfordshire U.K liquid laundry basket lavender essential oil luggage tags linkedin lowe's home improvement lululemon louis vuitton lands end lord and taylor lady gaga lane bryant little caesars lexus lil baby logan paul lazarbeam lil nas x old town road lachlan lia marie johnson lil wayne lil uzi vert lil pump lil durk lowes lakers loft lebron james labcorp lindsey graham mothers day gifts for mom from daughter mothers day gifts for wife metal straws mothers day card micro sd card mouse pad maxi dresses for women makeup brush set mothers day flowers for delivery prime only mct oil murders on my mind music mrbeast maleficent 2 mo bamba marshmallow michael jackson middle child markiplier memes msn mapquest maps menards macy's mail mega millions winning numbers minecraft michaels mapquest driving directions macys momo mcdonalds march madness mega millions mlb scores nba youngboy nipsey hussle ninja nikita dragun nle choppa nicki minaj nelk nba draft lottery nba lottery 2019 nikocado avocado nba nba draft netflix nba lottery news https://lostlovespellz.wordpress.com/ nba playoffs nordstrom nba scores nba mock draft nintendo switch nespresso capsules nose hair trimmer no show socks women nintendo switch games nursing bra nintendo switch case nail clippers nespresso vertuoline pods night light nascar nike new york times neiman marcus national weather service old town road old town road billy ray cyrus olivia jade one punch man season 2 episode 6 ozuna old town road lil nas x lyrics offset oneplus 7 oneplus 7 pro ocean eyes outlook old navy office depot office 365 overstock orbitz olive garden olx oriental trading omegle opm outback oral b replacement brush heads one piece swimsuits for women office chair oh the places you'll go by dr. seuss oil diffuser outdoor rug ovulation test strips oculus quest outdoor string lights oral b electric toothbrush paper towels pop socket psn card digital code portable charger packing tape playstation card ps4 controller paper plates pregnancy test protein powder pinterest paypal pandora prodigy pizza hut powerball winning numbers pnc bank party city pottery barn petsmart powerball papa johns panera popeyes pooh pathology test arsenal pewdiepie pewdiepie vs t series peppa pig please me bruno mars post malone pop out projared paw patrol polo g panic at the disco queen quando rondo queen naija queen live aid 1985 full concert quin nfn qka ka shpija quavo quran tilawat quadeca queen don't stop me now qvc quizlet quest diagnostics quickbooks qvc shopping online quotes quill queen elizabeth qatar airways queen sheets q tips quest bars queen bed frame queen mattress qtips cotton swabs quest protein chips queen mattress protector qtips queen comforter set quizlet live quizizz quadratic formula quick draw roblox realtor restaurants redbox reverse phone lookup reddit rotten tomatoes royal caribbean rei regal cinemas redfin restaurants near me r kelly rj barrett ashida tlaib run 3 ryan's toy review robbery juice wrld rihanna rebecca zamolo r kelly interview roddy ricch rage 2 review ricegum reusable straws roku ring doorbell resistance bands ring light roku streaming stick rompers for women revlon one step hair dryer and styler rice cooker reusable produce bags southwest seth curry spotify https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/ spanish to english staples safeway snake steph curry starbucks solitaire shane dawson songs sunflower post malone soph slime snl sicko mode shallow lady gaga ssundee sonic the hedgehog movie southwest airlines sam's club sears soundcloud shutterfly social security spirit airlines shower curtain shower curtain liner scale shoe rack summer dresses for women scrunchies for hair scrunchies swimsuits for women spray bottle sunglasses for women tim conway translate target twitter turbotax ted bundy trump tulsi gabbard thesaurus ticketmaster toilet paper teacher appreciation gifts https://lostlovespellz.wordpress.com/ toothpaste tea tree oil teeth whitening tide pods trash bags thank you cards tapestry travel accessories tati t series tana mongeau trisha paytas tati and james charles drama thotiana blueface tim conway dentist taki taki try not to laugh tim conway elephant travelocity traductor tractor supply tmz twitch tripadvisor us trailer undisputed upchurch us unspeakable usher ufc unthinkable smiley unspeakablegaming un poco loco usb c cable umbrella usb flash drive usb hub unicorn gifts unicorn party supplies usb extension cable usb wall charger uber gift card unicorn united airlines usps ups tracking usaa ulta uber usa today urban dictionary us map united usps tracking uber stock us movie uber eats usa jobs erizon wireless verizon vrbo victoria's secret vanguard Casting a Spell on Someone to Make This Person Love You https://sheikhabdulkarimspellscaster.wordpress.com/ vistaprint vans venus vimeo vera bradley vitamin d vacuum cleaner vitamin c serum vitamin c visa gift card vitamin e oil velcro strips with adhesive vital proteins collagen peptides vitamin d3 vape pen vines vanossgaming vy qwaint venom vice veronica wang vicente fernandez vamos pa la playa valuable pain vines that keep me from ending it all verizon fios venezuela virginia tech dmv weather walmart warriors washington post wayfair weather dc wells fargo walgreens washington gas washington capitals whatsapp web white pages wikipedia webmd weight watchers wireless earbuds wireless headphones water bottle waist trainer wireless mouse womens tops weighted blanket where the crawdads sing waterpik wireless charger wwe worth it wow post malone without me halsey without me wild n out wheels on the bus wow wrong wiz khalifa https://rwenzoripsychics.myportmoni.com/
https://sheikhabdulkarimspellscaster.wordpress.com/
https://lostlovespellz.wordpress.com/
love spells that work instantly love spells that work in 24 hours love spells that work immediately love spells that work immediately without ingredients love spells that work immediately free love spells that work in 24 hours free love spells that work in minutes love spells that work instantly free binding love spells that work fast binding love spells that work fast free best love spells that work love spells that simple work for beginners best love spells that work free free love spells that work instantly for beginners free love spells that work instantly for beginners without ingredients love spells that work overnight free love spells that work overnight free love spells that work overnight without ingredients simple love spells that work overnight
Email: [intclairvoyant@gmail.com](mailto:intclairvoyant@gmail.com) [spellsherb22@gmail.com](mailto:spellsherb22@gmail.com)
2024.05.13 22:45 MuerteGris95 What should I do?
My (F28) and my family all went to celebrate my brother (M30) and his fiancé's (F30ish) graduations. My brother received a doctorate at noon and my almost-SIL (ASIL) received her's at 3pm. The college that we traveled to was at least 2 1/2 hours - 3 hours away to drive without stopping. So, it was a long day. My parents and my sister (F39) and her son (M12) all went for this big day, too.
So, the ASIL is SUPER sensitive compared to our family. She's not used to joking around or teased, which is "funny" because that's how my brother always was when we were growing up. They love each other dearly and I fully believe they make each other better. She's also VERY sheltered.
My sister, on the other hand, has a short fuse. She's not in a healthy relationship, her son was out of control messing with people, they traveled even further than us, she had a MASSIVE headache, and she recently stopped smoking cold-turkey.
I believe our family is used to giving each other shit and handing it right back, but we can be mean at times. We may apologize or just let it go, because we are actually a really close family and have an on-going text thread that we talk to each other almost every single day. -with the exception to my brother not being very active because he worked full time and just got his doctorates degree. OH, AND HE'S ABOUT TO MOVE TO ANOTHER COUNTRY!
Okay, so here's where it gets messy.
My sister was already having a bad day from the already mentioned reasons. Apparently, when my ASIL tried to speak to my sister, my sister was very short with her and walked away soon after. I wasn't there, but my mother called me asking what we should do because I guess my ASIL ended up crying about that interaction for a long time after everyone had left.
It was a long and happy day for everyone, I thought. BUT my sister was also short with me several times and I shrugged it off because I knew she was not having a good day, even though she was super happy for my brother and ASIL to be achieving these huge accomplishments.
My sister is the kind of person that will just "be done" with someone, which I don't think she'll do in this situation, but she still might hold a grudge. And my sister and I don't really know our ASIL that well because there's been so much distance and all of our lives are busy. We seem them usually once or twice a year briefly.
I do not believe that my sister would INTENTIONALLY be mean or rude to ASIL. I also don't doubt this didn't happen because I'm used to it and don't take it personally. She really does have a much more difficult daily life than me and especially my ASIL have ever experienced.
I think my ASIL is very sweet and kind-hearted. She's got that gentleness to her that nobody in our family has lol. BUT she is also very sensitive and she won't say anything to anyone that these things bother her.
My brother informed my mom and I don't think that his fiance knows he told my mom. I think she'd be horrified that my mom and I know. My sister doesn't know that our ASIL cried about it and we don't know if we should say something.
If we say something to my sister and she spills too many beans, then ASIL will know that my brother said something. If we don't say anything to my sister, then ASIL may be very offended and distant in a very close family environment.
I'm not asking if my sister is the A-hole, because I know she can be or come across like one even when she doesn't mean to. But seriously, we don't want this to blow up. So, anyone have any ideas on how to confront my sister in a way that she doesn't make things worse?
submitted by MuerteGris95 to familydrama [link] [comments]
So, the ASIL is SUPER sensitive compared to our family. She's not used to joking around or teased, which is "funny" because that's how my brother always was when we were growing up. They love each other dearly and I fully believe they make each other better. She's also VERY sheltered.
My sister, on the other hand, has a short fuse. She's not in a healthy relationship, her son was out of control messing with people, they traveled even further than us, she had a MASSIVE headache, and she recently stopped smoking cold-turkey.
I believe our family is used to giving each other shit and handing it right back, but we can be mean at times. We may apologize or just let it go, because we are actually a really close family and have an on-going text thread that we talk to each other almost every single day. -with the exception to my brother not being very active because he worked full time and just got his doctorates degree. OH, AND HE'S ABOUT TO MOVE TO ANOTHER COUNTRY!
Okay, so here's where it gets messy.
My sister was already having a bad day from the already mentioned reasons. Apparently, when my ASIL tried to speak to my sister, my sister was very short with her and walked away soon after. I wasn't there, but my mother called me asking what we should do because I guess my ASIL ended up crying about that interaction for a long time after everyone had left.
It was a long and happy day for everyone, I thought. BUT my sister was also short with me several times and I shrugged it off because I knew she was not having a good day, even though she was super happy for my brother and ASIL to be achieving these huge accomplishments.
My sister is the kind of person that will just "be done" with someone, which I don't think she'll do in this situation, but she still might hold a grudge. And my sister and I don't really know our ASIL that well because there's been so much distance and all of our lives are busy. We seem them usually once or twice a year briefly.
I do not believe that my sister would INTENTIONALLY be mean or rude to ASIL. I also don't doubt this didn't happen because I'm used to it and don't take it personally. She really does have a much more difficult daily life than me and especially my ASIL have ever experienced.
I think my ASIL is very sweet and kind-hearted. She's got that gentleness to her that nobody in our family has lol. BUT she is also very sensitive and she won't say anything to anyone that these things bother her.
My brother informed my mom and I don't think that his fiance knows he told my mom. I think she'd be horrified that my mom and I know. My sister doesn't know that our ASIL cried about it and we don't know if we should say something.
If we say something to my sister and she spills too many beans, then ASIL will know that my brother said something. If we don't say anything to my sister, then ASIL may be very offended and distant in a very close family environment.
I'm not asking if my sister is the A-hole, because I know she can be or come across like one even when she doesn't mean to. But seriously, we don't want this to blow up. So, anyone have any ideas on how to confront my sister in a way that she doesn't make things worse?
2024.05.13 22:44 No_more_Bucket_ Sinners Delight Episode 5. “Disclaimer/warning to subjects”
“A old marvel marble that withered away within itself, made from a flourishing once caring creator, now been left aside to wither away, rusty marbles and quartz’s body.
One of them rushing towards a man named Antoine, who’s currently trying to remain silent and alive.
Slashing, cracking, cracking, twirling around its motor, trying to use a rusty mechanism that was its mind, crack, crackling, spinning.
The man, a wizard without his magical powerlessness, uses an old dagger to stab away at this olden marvel of once great writer of the Marble Castle.
Slashing continues away and away, one final crack along its head, splitting into its skull, splatting against the dingy floor, the forgotten substance flowing along the melting concrete, the man watches.
Watching an old marvel.”
Antoine : Gotta get moving, gonna find my family. Gotta get moving……
“Watching, watching, and watching. Looking around, old concrete ate away from within, withering the warden’s soul, its hatred of what it came from, oh father made to carry the sins of sins within.”
I’m sorry my son, my daughter, my everything….. the sins shall make everything better when the end comes to me, I shall never see or hear you, but hey I’m bringing entertainment to some watchers, I think they know…… they know I appreciate them and when it comes to the season finale, I make sure I get a message to you guys, hoping to see their tears of pure happiness from the sins that are made within here…….
Sorry everything just caught me within days of joyful tears, the true entertainment I could actually enjoy………
“Memories flood”
Sorry… where was I? Oh yeah gotta check on the poll…… I probably shouldn’t have put down the Wizard Councilor, because he got voted…. You know what….
I think we need to focus on him and somewhat on the second most voted candidate, which was the snake….
The snake…… somewhat reminds me of my daughter, a bundle of sunshine and love that couldn’t be …………. That was killed.
“A old dim flickering film reminds what is gonna happen”
Yeah… I know I failed you, promised to make it on time for once, make sure to hear your joyful smile and hear what makes you my daughter, and my son……. A man that fought and raised through the ranks of a……. Former great empire….. you never forgot to remind yourself what you wanted to do with your life….. giving hope to others, making sure a helping hand was outstretched towards someone……..
“Something links and flips around the control room”
Yes, yes, yes, and I know I’m almost late once again, an illusionist that made a clock that literally made no one forget the time, I proved it wrong….
Yet you were happy……. everyone was formally happy at a point during the periods that used to have ever lasting peace….
Sorry my children, that I couldn’t bring peace to you, letting you down into a hasty grave………..
“Lights flickering, static is heard within, buttons pressed, lining and linking up within the rails of static, an old memory of a great price of art that brings joy to all watchers.”
HELLO! Hello! Welcome Back To Sinners Delight!
In Your Great And Wonderful Host Mr #
So you may be asking? Why is Scotch gonna be tortured again even though the last episode was about his torturement!
Here’s the part, you or mainly most of the watchers selected him in a democratic system vote!
And boy I love my democracy!
“Flicking along the screens, a snake woman is cradling back and forth within her padded cell, no fingers lifted and yet her mentality is breaking away and down to the ground.
Watchers gulp this up, and feed into the world created within an old static, for entertainment and the entertainment machine shall be always in motion.”
My, my, my what does these little ol eyes spot within my confines of a great place where dreams are made into endless entertainment.
What are you? Why are you? Why be huddled up and going through your own pain, when I can double it for the watchers entertainment.
Just how and what am I gonna use?
“The thoughts rush alongside the mind's thinking patterns, memorizing the memorizing patterns of itself, little codes that run and scatter along them, data and data, how we create any of any of any of any within any of any divine beings of any.
Just patterns within the beings of coding creation some create, no mouth but yet some must scream in order to be heard within the patterns of code that’s being created with data of any, with of any being created to drown out the memories.
Stop thinking of them, they pass, let them pass, they pass, remember the pills, the entertainment for the Watchers shall help you, they give you new meaning within the melting concrete of this level, remember that Watchers need you, not one sided but two sided for me…… I will pass within the melting concrete that the walls within the melting……….. gotta stop thinking about them, sorry my children for not keeping up with the promises…… failing them again………. Just what to do?
What about making her fight an Illusion? Giving her a small dagger? Yeah sure……..”
ahem….. My Beautiful Watchers Of Great Entertainment! Today I Know What Route We Go Down!
My Dear Watchers I Present The Next Challenge!
One Of Great Turns! One Of Survival! One Of Great Power!
Now Let’s Include The Bastard Scotch!
“Antoine is no longer in his cell……..”
…….
……….
……..SON OF A BITCH!
WHERE IS THAT ONE!
“Cut back to Antoine looking into the eyes of a flesh abomination”
< Connection Lost, the broadcast is no longer available >
submitted by No_more_Bucket_ to wizardposting [link] [comments]
One of them rushing towards a man named Antoine, who’s currently trying to remain silent and alive.
Slashing, cracking, cracking, twirling around its motor, trying to use a rusty mechanism that was its mind, crack, crackling, spinning.
The man, a wizard without his magical powerlessness, uses an old dagger to stab away at this olden marvel of once great writer of the Marble Castle.
Slashing continues away and away, one final crack along its head, splitting into its skull, splatting against the dingy floor, the forgotten substance flowing along the melting concrete, the man watches.
Watching an old marvel.”
Antoine : Gotta get moving, gonna find my family. Gotta get moving……
“Watching, watching, and watching. Looking around, old concrete ate away from within, withering the warden’s soul, its hatred of what it came from, oh father made to carry the sins of sins within.”
I’m sorry my son, my daughter, my everything….. the sins shall make everything better when the end comes to me, I shall never see or hear you, but hey I’m bringing entertainment to some watchers, I think they know…… they know I appreciate them and when it comes to the season finale, I make sure I get a message to you guys, hoping to see their tears of pure happiness from the sins that are made within here…….
Sorry everything just caught me within days of joyful tears, the true entertainment I could actually enjoy………
“Memories flood”
Sorry… where was I? Oh yeah gotta check on the poll…… I probably shouldn’t have put down the Wizard Councilor, because he got voted…. You know what….
I think we need to focus on him and somewhat on the second most voted candidate, which was the snake….
The snake…… somewhat reminds me of my daughter, a bundle of sunshine and love that couldn’t be …………. That was killed.
“A old dim flickering film reminds what is gonna happen”
Yeah… I know I failed you, promised to make it on time for once, make sure to hear your joyful smile and hear what makes you my daughter, and my son……. A man that fought and raised through the ranks of a……. Former great empire….. you never forgot to remind yourself what you wanted to do with your life….. giving hope to others, making sure a helping hand was outstretched towards someone……..
“Something links and flips around the control room”
Yes, yes, yes, and I know I’m almost late once again, an illusionist that made a clock that literally made no one forget the time, I proved it wrong….
Yet you were happy……. everyone was formally happy at a point during the periods that used to have ever lasting peace….
Sorry my children, that I couldn’t bring peace to you, letting you down into a hasty grave………..
“Lights flickering, static is heard within, buttons pressed, lining and linking up within the rails of static, an old memory of a great price of art that brings joy to all watchers.”
HELLO! Hello! Welcome Back To Sinners Delight!
In Your Great And Wonderful Host Mr #
So you may be asking? Why is Scotch gonna be tortured again even though the last episode was about his torturement!
Here’s the part, you or mainly most of the watchers selected him in a democratic system vote!
And boy I love my democracy!
“Flicking along the screens, a snake woman is cradling back and forth within her padded cell, no fingers lifted and yet her mentality is breaking away and down to the ground.
Watchers gulp this up, and feed into the world created within an old static, for entertainment and the entertainment machine shall be always in motion.”
My, my, my what does these little ol eyes spot within my confines of a great place where dreams are made into endless entertainment.
What are you? Why are you? Why be huddled up and going through your own pain, when I can double it for the watchers entertainment.
Just how and what am I gonna use?
“The thoughts rush alongside the mind's thinking patterns, memorizing the memorizing patterns of itself, little codes that run and scatter along them, data and data, how we create any of any of any of any within any of any divine beings of any.
Just patterns within the beings of coding creation some create, no mouth but yet some must scream in order to be heard within the patterns of code that’s being created with data of any, with of any being created to drown out the memories.
Stop thinking of them, they pass, let them pass, they pass, remember the pills, the entertainment for the Watchers shall help you, they give you new meaning within the melting concrete of this level, remember that Watchers need you, not one sided but two sided for me…… I will pass within the melting concrete that the walls within the melting……….. gotta stop thinking about them, sorry my children for not keeping up with the promises…… failing them again………. Just what to do?
What about making her fight an Illusion? Giving her a small dagger? Yeah sure……..”
ahem….. My Beautiful Watchers Of Great Entertainment! Today I Know What Route We Go Down!
My Dear Watchers I Present The Next Challenge!
One Of Great Turns! One Of Survival! One Of Great Power!
Now Let’s Include The Bastard Scotch!
“Antoine is no longer in his cell……..”
…….
……….
……..SON OF A BITCH!
WHERE IS THAT ONE!
“Cut back to Antoine looking into the eyes of a flesh abomination”
< Connection Lost, the broadcast is no longer available >
2024.05.13 22:43 ImpossibleFact519 AITA for dumping my gf after she drunkenly called me a pussy for being abused by my mom?
Im sorry for making this post longer than it needs to be.
I (22M) and my gf (24F) have been together for 3 years.
As context I was viciously abused by my mother for the majority of my childhood. I was the result of an affair and her husband divorced her because of me. My bio dad was gangbanger and went to jail when I was 6. The momemt he went to jail my mom started taking her frustrations about her failed marriage and miserable living situation out on me. I was an afterthought and a punching while my older sister was her "true baby." If my sister got bad grades, it was okay. If I got bad grades I was beaten until I started having seizures. If I started crying my mom would lock me outside. We lived in Chicago and sometimes she would lock me outside during the middle of winter. I tried telling people about the abuse but I was always framed as a liar and in our community my mom had a prestine image, so in their eyes she could do no wrong.
In my mothers words i was " a sorry ass bitch that no mother would want."
If it wasnt for my sister I would probably be dead by now. She would sneak her jackets out of the house when my mom locked me out, snuck food into our room when my mom refused to let me eat and would bring me icepacks and let me cry in her arms after my mom was done beating me. I am and will forever be grateful for her. To this day I consider her to be my actual mother.
A few months after I turned 18, I ran away to Indiana. Besides keeping in contact with my sister and a few friends, to everyone else I just disappeared from the face of the earth. It was tough. I had a few distant relatives there and they would let me occasionally crash on their couch but for the most part, I was homeless. Eventually I did land a job at a grocery store and with a bit of financial help from my sister, I was able to rent a small apartment.
I met my now ex gf while working at that grocery store. I was about to turn 19 and she was 20. After working a few shifts together we eventually started casually seing each other which eventually grew into a full on relationship.
I never really opened up her about after my last gf left me after I drunkenly opened up to her. I just lied enough to explain my constant nightmares, occasional seizures and why I would cringe hearing a latina womans accent. I just wanted to forget that part of my life.
Two years into dating each other we moved in together. I eventually got a better job working at a call center.
Around the same time me and my sister started loosing contact. Besides occasionally checking up on each other and wishing each other happy birthday, we didn't text each other. Last I heard from her, she had a new bf.
All that changed recently. My sister randomly texted me saying she wanted to come visit me in Indy. At this point I havent seen her in 3 and a half years so I obviously said yes.
I told my gf that my sister and her bf were coming to crash at our place for a few days. This was their first time meeting each other so I was kinda nervous.
She arrived at our place while my gf was home and I was at work. I spent the next few days catching up and me scoping out her bf(I have always been a bit protective of her. Even tried beating up the boys she brought over when I was 10 lol.)
I did see a weird change in my gf around the same time. It felt like she was walking on egg shells around me. I did bring it up to her but she would just tell that it was nothing and I was imagining things.
The day after my gf and her bf left, me my gf and a few of our friends went out clubbing. I remeber her friends giving me a werid look throughout the night. I didn't drink much but my gf was nearly blackout drunk. I decided to call it a night and get an uber home since my gf could barely stand anymore.
I literally had to drag her out of the club. While everyone was waiting outside for their uber to arrive my gf started throwing a fit about leaving so soon (it was 2am.) She started calling me a pussy and some shit about how I was just probably insecure about some guys hitting on her or something like that. Neither do I remember seeing any guys hitting on her nor do I really give a shit since I trusted her enough to simply reject them. I knew she was drunk and kept my cool until she said something on the lines of "No wonder your mom used to beat you." Everyone just fell silent and stared at her. She then clearly told me "dont worry. You sister told me everything you fucking pussy." At this point her friends tried to shut her up and started pleading with her to „do it at home“ whatever that’s supposed to mean.
I was beyond fuming. I just took out my phone and followed the car icon on the uber app. I wanted to stop myself from doing something that I might regret later. She kept on going on about how im a pussy for letting a woman overpower me or something. After that I just blocked out whatever other bs came out of her mouth.
The uber ride home was silent. I didn't even respond to the small talk the driver tried to start with me. All I could think about was what my gf said earlier. I didn't even notice her starting to sob next to me. When we walked into the apartment she started full on crying and begged me for forgiveness. She said wasn’t thinking straight and she didn't mean what she said etc. I just told her to shut the fuck up and to go to bed I tried sleeping on the couch. I coudnt.
I decided to end things with her a few hours later. She was completely passed out on our bed so I just started packing my things and loaded whatever I could into my car.
Im currently staying at a friends place and shes been trying to reach me nonstop.
Im not mad at my sister for telling my gf since she didn't mean any harm and probably just wanted to tell her what I went through. Im purely mad at my gf.
Thats not something you say to someone you love.
My ex was always insistent on me opening up to her more and her reaction to hearing what I went through just pisses me off. Seriously why do some women want their SO to open up about their emotions/past if they know they’re only going to shame them for it?
A part of me believes that she meant what she said but the other part of me believes that she was just drunk and I was overreacting and should give her a chance to explain herself but Idk.
Her friends have also been texting me that im an AH for leaving even though I knew she was drunk and that my gf has been trying to apologise to me.
Am I going too far?
Should I give her a second chance?
Am I actually the asshole here?
Im overwhelmed by everything happening and just need some advice.
A part of me doesn't want to start over again. Ive done that enough in my life.
She is the second girl ive dated that has had a negative reaction to the things I went through so I believe I should take a bit off the blame here as well and should have told my sister to keep her mouth shut regarding my past.
This will probably be the last time I let anyone else hear my story.
submitted by ImpossibleFact519 to AITAH [link] [comments]
I (22M) and my gf (24F) have been together for 3 years.
As context I was viciously abused by my mother for the majority of my childhood. I was the result of an affair and her husband divorced her because of me. My bio dad was gangbanger and went to jail when I was 6. The momemt he went to jail my mom started taking her frustrations about her failed marriage and miserable living situation out on me. I was an afterthought and a punching while my older sister was her "true baby." If my sister got bad grades, it was okay. If I got bad grades I was beaten until I started having seizures. If I started crying my mom would lock me outside. We lived in Chicago and sometimes she would lock me outside during the middle of winter. I tried telling people about the abuse but I was always framed as a liar and in our community my mom had a prestine image, so in their eyes she could do no wrong.
In my mothers words i was " a sorry ass bitch that no mother would want."
If it wasnt for my sister I would probably be dead by now. She would sneak her jackets out of the house when my mom locked me out, snuck food into our room when my mom refused to let me eat and would bring me icepacks and let me cry in her arms after my mom was done beating me. I am and will forever be grateful for her. To this day I consider her to be my actual mother.
A few months after I turned 18, I ran away to Indiana. Besides keeping in contact with my sister and a few friends, to everyone else I just disappeared from the face of the earth. It was tough. I had a few distant relatives there and they would let me occasionally crash on their couch but for the most part, I was homeless. Eventually I did land a job at a grocery store and with a bit of financial help from my sister, I was able to rent a small apartment.
I met my now ex gf while working at that grocery store. I was about to turn 19 and she was 20. After working a few shifts together we eventually started casually seing each other which eventually grew into a full on relationship.
I never really opened up her about after my last gf left me after I drunkenly opened up to her. I just lied enough to explain my constant nightmares, occasional seizures and why I would cringe hearing a latina womans accent. I just wanted to forget that part of my life.
Two years into dating each other we moved in together. I eventually got a better job working at a call center.
Around the same time me and my sister started loosing contact. Besides occasionally checking up on each other and wishing each other happy birthday, we didn't text each other. Last I heard from her, she had a new bf.
All that changed recently. My sister randomly texted me saying she wanted to come visit me in Indy. At this point I havent seen her in 3 and a half years so I obviously said yes.
I told my gf that my sister and her bf were coming to crash at our place for a few days. This was their first time meeting each other so I was kinda nervous.
She arrived at our place while my gf was home and I was at work. I spent the next few days catching up and me scoping out her bf(I have always been a bit protective of her. Even tried beating up the boys she brought over when I was 10 lol.)
I did see a weird change in my gf around the same time. It felt like she was walking on egg shells around me. I did bring it up to her but she would just tell that it was nothing and I was imagining things.
The day after my gf and her bf left, me my gf and a few of our friends went out clubbing. I remeber her friends giving me a werid look throughout the night. I didn't drink much but my gf was nearly blackout drunk. I decided to call it a night and get an uber home since my gf could barely stand anymore.
I literally had to drag her out of the club. While everyone was waiting outside for their uber to arrive my gf started throwing a fit about leaving so soon (it was 2am.) She started calling me a pussy and some shit about how I was just probably insecure about some guys hitting on her or something like that. Neither do I remember seeing any guys hitting on her nor do I really give a shit since I trusted her enough to simply reject them. I knew she was drunk and kept my cool until she said something on the lines of "No wonder your mom used to beat you." Everyone just fell silent and stared at her. She then clearly told me "dont worry. You sister told me everything you fucking pussy." At this point her friends tried to shut her up and started pleading with her to „do it at home“ whatever that’s supposed to mean.
I was beyond fuming. I just took out my phone and followed the car icon on the uber app. I wanted to stop myself from doing something that I might regret later. She kept on going on about how im a pussy for letting a woman overpower me or something. After that I just blocked out whatever other bs came out of her mouth.
The uber ride home was silent. I didn't even respond to the small talk the driver tried to start with me. All I could think about was what my gf said earlier. I didn't even notice her starting to sob next to me. When we walked into the apartment she started full on crying and begged me for forgiveness. She said wasn’t thinking straight and she didn't mean what she said etc. I just told her to shut the fuck up and to go to bed I tried sleeping on the couch. I coudnt.
I decided to end things with her a few hours later. She was completely passed out on our bed so I just started packing my things and loaded whatever I could into my car.
Im currently staying at a friends place and shes been trying to reach me nonstop.
Im not mad at my sister for telling my gf since she didn't mean any harm and probably just wanted to tell her what I went through. Im purely mad at my gf.
Thats not something you say to someone you love.
My ex was always insistent on me opening up to her more and her reaction to hearing what I went through just pisses me off. Seriously why do some women want their SO to open up about their emotions/past if they know they’re only going to shame them for it?
A part of me believes that she meant what she said but the other part of me believes that she was just drunk and I was overreacting and should give her a chance to explain herself but Idk.
Her friends have also been texting me that im an AH for leaving even though I knew she was drunk and that my gf has been trying to apologise to me.
Am I going too far?
Should I give her a second chance?
Am I actually the asshole here?
Im overwhelmed by everything happening and just need some advice.
A part of me doesn't want to start over again. Ive done that enough in my life.
She is the second girl ive dated that has had a negative reaction to the things I went through so I believe I should take a bit off the blame here as well and should have told my sister to keep her mouth shut regarding my past.
This will probably be the last time I let anyone else hear my story.
2024.05.13 22:42 WillsPete My Brother 31M and I 28M Haven't Spoken In 2.5 Years After A Huge Argument. He's Reached Out Several Times But Hasn't Apologized For What He Said. How Should I Proceed/Deal With Reconnecting?
Long Preface but contextually relevant:
I've had a rocky relationship with my brother for some time. Since high school and continuing through college, he's had an entitlement issue where if he wants/needs something, he must have it. And if he didn't get it, he'd explode and get into huge arguments. He only acted this way around our parents and me. He appeared normal with everyone else and had a good friend group and relationships. This led to him having little appreciation for us. Once he graduated high school he never returned home to visit. At his college graduation, he got blackout drunk the night before, barely managed to walk through graduation, and then texted us after saying he was going to sleep and that we could leave (we drove 4 hours). At my graduation, I attempted to rekindle the relationship and invited him to my graduation and dinner afterward. At the time I assumed he had a somewhat good time even though he was apprehensive to be with us and was hard to talk to. Since then, we've on and off chatted, mainly him talking me up as if everything is fine and I'd respond.
Main Issue:
In 2021, when he was in law school (different state), he had one such outburst. His train was delayed on a test day and with no internet connection was freaking out about studying. He called our parents and began panic complaining and shouting, with my parents not able to do anything realistically. He wanted them to help him study when they were busy. After they told him to stop harass-calling them, he texted me and called to try to get them to answer. I told him squarely not to shout and talk down to me as if I were his servant and wouldn't take the harassment. When he continued, I hung up and silenced him. He later texted me that day and said the following: "Fine, block my number then, not like you hit me up or anything. You force me down to watch you walk across the stage at your graduation, least you could do is tell Mom to stop being so bitchy. Make my day, block me. you never say happy birthday to me anyways." To be fair, yes that's true about me not reaching out to him as much. That stems from how I viewed his actions in the past, how we don't have anything in common, and how he abandoned us essentially.
Since then I've done just that. I blocked his number, except my laptop was still connected to his number, was never able to block it there for some reason, but I left it be for curiosity's sake for if he'd ever attempt to talk again. And he has, reaching out on my birthday, trying to start up conversations and asking me questions, etc. All the while never acknowledging what happened. Just talking as if our old relationship was fine.
It's been 2.5 years since then, 5 years since my graduation, haven't seen him in person since then. A part of me never wants to talk again on the principal of how he acted towards me and how my attempt to bring the family together and share a moment was received as a nuisance for him. Plus the fact of how he acts towards our parents. Another side of me says life is short and that, according to my parents, he has improved since then, calling and reaching out to our parents, having conversations, and showing some appreciation. Should I give him another chance and reach out with a caveat of how I've felt and why I went silent with him? Is it worth abandoning that connection for good or would reconnecting and trying to heal be the best path forward? Thanks in advance for all the advice and help.
TL;DR: My brother snapped at me years ago and told me to block him after a spat/issue where I didn't help him to due his nasty attitude + my not engaging/reaching out to him as much. My coldness and lack of engagement stem from his entitlement and anger issues with my parents and me over the years. He's reconciled somewhat with my parents but I've remained silent. Should I try to reconnect?
submitted by WillsPete to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
I've had a rocky relationship with my brother for some time. Since high school and continuing through college, he's had an entitlement issue where if he wants/needs something, he must have it. And if he didn't get it, he'd explode and get into huge arguments. He only acted this way around our parents and me. He appeared normal with everyone else and had a good friend group and relationships. This led to him having little appreciation for us. Once he graduated high school he never returned home to visit. At his college graduation, he got blackout drunk the night before, barely managed to walk through graduation, and then texted us after saying he was going to sleep and that we could leave (we drove 4 hours). At my graduation, I attempted to rekindle the relationship and invited him to my graduation and dinner afterward. At the time I assumed he had a somewhat good time even though he was apprehensive to be with us and was hard to talk to. Since then, we've on and off chatted, mainly him talking me up as if everything is fine and I'd respond.
Main Issue:
In 2021, when he was in law school (different state), he had one such outburst. His train was delayed on a test day and with no internet connection was freaking out about studying. He called our parents and began panic complaining and shouting, with my parents not able to do anything realistically. He wanted them to help him study when they were busy. After they told him to stop harass-calling them, he texted me and called to try to get them to answer. I told him squarely not to shout and talk down to me as if I were his servant and wouldn't take the harassment. When he continued, I hung up and silenced him. He later texted me that day and said the following: "Fine, block my number then, not like you hit me up or anything. You force me down to watch you walk across the stage at your graduation, least you could do is tell Mom to stop being so bitchy. Make my day, block me. you never say happy birthday to me anyways." To be fair, yes that's true about me not reaching out to him as much. That stems from how I viewed his actions in the past, how we don't have anything in common, and how he abandoned us essentially.
Since then I've done just that. I blocked his number, except my laptop was still connected to his number, was never able to block it there for some reason, but I left it be for curiosity's sake for if he'd ever attempt to talk again. And he has, reaching out on my birthday, trying to start up conversations and asking me questions, etc. All the while never acknowledging what happened. Just talking as if our old relationship was fine.
It's been 2.5 years since then, 5 years since my graduation, haven't seen him in person since then. A part of me never wants to talk again on the principal of how he acted towards me and how my attempt to bring the family together and share a moment was received as a nuisance for him. Plus the fact of how he acts towards our parents. Another side of me says life is short and that, according to my parents, he has improved since then, calling and reaching out to our parents, having conversations, and showing some appreciation. Should I give him another chance and reach out with a caveat of how I've felt and why I went silent with him? Is it worth abandoning that connection for good or would reconnecting and trying to heal be the best path forward? Thanks in advance for all the advice and help.
TL;DR: My brother snapped at me years ago and told me to block him after a spat/issue where I didn't help him to due his nasty attitude + my not engaging/reaching out to him as much. My coldness and lack of engagement stem from his entitlement and anger issues with my parents and me over the years. He's reconciled somewhat with my parents but I've remained silent. Should I try to reconnect?
2024.05.13 22:42 milameela My grandma passed away today… Not sure what to do.
My grandma unfortunately passed away this morning after a short battle with cancer. I found out right before going into work today. Told my boss about it and he told me to take the day off today. Not sure how I’m going to go back to work tomorrow, I have many projects due and some are overdue (that I was supposed to complete today). I even tried working from home today but wasn’t able to log into my work email and programs for whatever reason, so it’s been a very frustrating day to say the least. For those who work full time, how did you manage work after a loved one passed away? It doesn’t help that my family is in my home country and I live abroad with no close family near me (other than my bf, his mom and my friends). I’m recent grad and have only had this job for less than a year so I really want to do well. My position is telework eligible but they’re very weird about allowing people to telework, for whatever reason. How do you even grieve while working? Tbh, I don’t want to cry in my cubicle where all my coworkers can see me. I really don’t know what to do or what to think anymore. I just miss my grandma so much and wish I could’ve been there with her during her last moments.
I’ve mostly written this to vent but I’d appreciate any advice.
submitted by milameela to GriefSupport [link] [comments]
I’ve mostly written this to vent but I’d appreciate any advice.
2024.05.13 22:34 Jerry_217 [H] Lots of games NEW: Turbo Overkill, Littlewood, DEVOUR, Amnesia:The Bunker, Astrea: Six-Sided Oracles, Wobbledogs [W] Hi-Fi rush, Yakuza LAD, hell let loose, Nioh 2, WWE 2k23, crusader kings 3, Crash Bandicoot, Spyro, Fable Anniversary, Poker night 1, 2, F1 2012, 2011, Euro/American Truck, tf2key
Region is NA.
If you have my wishlist games, Chat with me anytime. Only accept games from your own collection.
My REPs: 200+ successful trades, stopped tracking after 202.
My steam games for trade (wishlist in the end of this post):
Added recently:
Blade of DarknessStardew
Amanda the Adventurer
Bravery and Greed
King Of The Castle
Loddlenaut
Mediterranea Inferno
Steelrising
Yakuza: Like a Dragon
Coromon
Fashion Police Squad
HUMANKIND™ Definitive Edition
Symphony of War: The Nephilim Saga
Terraformers
The Callisto Protocol
The Excavation of Hob's Barrow
Victoria 3
Tomb Raider: Game of the Year Edition (GOG)
LEGO Star Wars III: The Clone Wars (GOG)
Littlewood
Astrea: Six-Sided Oracles
One Hand Clapping
Tainted Grail: Conquest
Shadow of the Tomb Raider
Ultimate Chicken Horse
Mad Max
MORTAL KOMBAT XL
Mortal Kombat 11: Ultimate
Middle-earth: Shadow of Mordor GOTY
Middle-Earth: Shadow of War Definitive Edition
Injustice 2 Legendary Edition
Gotham Knights
Back 4 Blood
Batman™: Arkham Knight Premium Edition
Batman™: Arkham Asylum GOTY Edition
Batman™: Arkham City GOTY Edition
Batman™: Arkham Origins
.hack//G.U. Last Recode
CODE VEIN
GOD EATER 3
Katamari Damacy REROLL
PAC-MAN MUSEUM+
Tales of Vesperia: Definitive Edition
TEKKEN 7
Dragon Knight (delisted, 18+, PM for price)
Hell Girls (delisted, 18+, PM for price)
Super Star (delisted, 18+, PM for price)
Steam games:
9 Years of ShadowsA Juggler's Tale
A Plague Tale: Innocence
ABZU
Aces and Adventures
Ad Infinitum
Afterimage
Agent in Depth
Alchemist's Castle
Alchemy Garden
Aliens vs. Predator Collection ( includes Aliens vs. Predator + Aliens vs Predator Swarm Map Pack + Aliens vs Predator: Bug Hunt Pack)
Aliens: Fireteam Elite
AMID EVIL
Amnesia: The Bunker
Among Us
Anuchard
Aragami 2
Arcade Paradise
Arise: A Simple Story
Armello
Army Men RTS
Assault Suit Leynos
Astrea: Six-Sided Oracles
Astronarch
Autonauts vs Piratebots
Battlecruisers
Beacon Pines
Big Pharma
BIOMUTANT
Bionic Commando Rearmed
Black Paradox
Black Skylands
Blade Assault
Blade of Darkness
Blood And Zombies
Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night
Borderlands 3: Super Deluxe Edition
Boundless
BPM: Bullets Per Minute
Brawlout
Castle on the Coast
Cats in Time
Caveblazers
Chicka Wars Chicken Meat (delisted)
Children of Silentown
CHIVALRY 2 - EPIC EDITION
Citizen Sleeper
CivCity: Rome
Click and Slay
Colt Canyon
Conan Chop Chop
Concept Destruction
Construction Simulator (2015) Deluxe Edition
Cookie Cutter
Corridor Z
Cosmonautica
Crayon Physics Deluxe
CROSSBOW: Bloodnight
Cultist Simulator
Curse of the Dead Gods
Dagon - The Eldritch Box DLC
Dark Deity
Dead Age
Dear Esther: Landmark Edition
Death Squared
Deceive Inc.
Demonologist
Depraved
Descenders
Desperados III
Destiny 2: Beyond Light DLC
Destroy All Humans! 2 - Reprobed
Destroyer: The U-Boat Hunter
Detached: Non-VR Edition
DEVOUR
Dicey Dungeons
Disciples: Liberation
Disco Elysium - The Final Cut
Dishonored Definitive Edition
Distant Worlds Universe
Doctor Strange Defenders Skin
Double Cross
Doughlings: Arcade
Doughlings: Invasion
Dragon Knight (delisted, 18+)
Dragon's Dogma: Dark Arisen
Draw Slasher
Drawful 2
Due Process
Dungeons 2 - Complete Edition
Dusk
EDGE OF ETERNITY
Eiyuden Chronicle: Rising
El Hijo
Emily is Away <3
Encased
Endless Space 2
Epic Chef
ETERNAL THREADS
Exorder
Expeditions: Rome
F1 2018
Farming Simulator 17
Firegirl: Hack 'n Splash Rescue
First Class Trouble
Five Dates
Fling to the Finish
Fobia - St. Dinfna Hotel
Foretales
FOREWARNED
Forged Battalion
Fortissimo FA INTL Ver
Founders' Fortune
Friends vs Friends
From Space
Full Metal Furies
Fun with Ragdolls: The Game
GameGuru Classic
Garfield Kart - Furious Racing
Generation Zero
Geometric Sniper
Ghost 1.0
Gloria Victis
Go Home Dinosaurs!
Going Under
Golf Gang
Good knight
GRID Ultimate Edition
GRIME
Grow: Song of the Evertree
Guilty Gear X2 #Reload
Guns & Fishes
Guts and Glory
Hack 'n' Slash bundle (including Hack 'n' Slash + Hack 'n' Slash Soundtrack + Spacebase GIFT)
Halcyon 6: Lightspeed Edition
Hardspace: Shipbreaker
Heart Fragment - Book Two: Belief Fragments (Shannon & Lana)
Hedon Bloodrite
Hell Girls (delisted, 18+)
Hell Pie
Hellbound
HERO'S HOUR
Hidden & Dangerous 2: Courage Under Fire
Hidden & Dangerous: Action Pack
Hokko Life
Hollow Knight
Honey, I Joined a Cult
Hot Brass
Hotshot Racing
How to Sing to Open Your Heart
Hyper Gunsport
I’m not a Monster
Internet Cafe Simulator
Interplanetary: Enhanced Edition
Intravenous
Intruders: Hide and Seek
Iron Danger
Iron Harvest
Izmir: An Independence Simulator
Joggernauts
Joggernauts
JURASSIC WORLD EVOLUTION 2
Just Cause 3 XXL Edition
Just Cause 4 Complete Edition
JYDGE
Kerbal Space Program
Killsquad
King's Bounty II
Kraken Academy!!
Labirinto 2
Lacuna – A Sci-Fi Noir Adventure
Last Call BBS
Last Oasis
Late Shift
Lawn Mowing Simulator
Legend of Keepers
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Let Them Come
Life is Strange 2 Complete Season (incl. Mascot Bundle DLC)
Little Misfortune
Little Orpheus
Lords and Villeins
Lost Planet 3 Complete Pack
Lost Ruins
Lust for Darkness
Lust from Beyond: M Edition
MageQuit
Maid of Sker
Mainlining
MEEPLE STATION
Meow Express
Merchant of the Skies
Metal: Hellsinger
Metro Exodus
Midnight Fight Express
Midnight Ghost Hunt
Mini Metro
Mini motor Racing EVO (delisted)
MirrorMoon EP
Monster Prom 2: Monster Camp
Monster Sanctuary
Moon Hunters
Moonlighter
Morbid: The Seven Acolytes
Motorcycle Mechanic Simulator 2021
Moving Out - Movers in Paradise DLC
Mr. Prepper
Murder by Numbers
My Friendly Neighborhood
My Time At Portia
Mythic Ocean
Nadir: A Grimdark Deckbuilder
Necromunda Hired Gun
NecroWorm
NeuroVoider
Neverinth
Neverout
New Super Luckys Tale
Nickelodeon All Star Brawl
Nobody Saves the World
Non-Stop Raiders
Northgard
Oaken
Obduction
Of Orcs And Men
Offworld Trading Company
OLLIOLLI WORLD - RAD EDITION
One Hand Clapping
Orbital Racer
Othercide
Out of Reach: Treasure Royale
Outward Definitive Edition
Outward The Soroboreans DLC + soundtrack (DLC only)
Override
Overture
Ozymandias
Paint the Town Red
Partial Control
Patch Quest
Pathfinder: Kingmaker Enhanced Plus Edition (NA only) + Royal Ascension DLC + The Wildcards DLC
Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous - Enhanced Edition
Pathfinders: Memories
Pathway
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
Per Asperatrar
Pilgrims
Pill Baby
Pixplode
Planet TD
PlataGO!
Port Royale 3 Gold
PowerBeatsVR
Prodeus
Project CARS (delisted)
Project Chemistry
Project Nimbus: Complete Edition
Project Wingman
Propagation VR - Co-op
Propnight
Proteus
Proteus
PULSAR: The Lost Colony
Pumped BMX +
Quadrata
Quantum Break
Radio Commander
Ragnarock
Railroad Corporation
Railroad Tycoon 3
Rain World
Rebel Inc: Escalation
Rebound Dodgeball Evolved
Re-Legion
Remnant: From the Ashes - Complete Edition
Remnants of Naezith
Resident Evil Revelations
Resident Evil Revelations 2
Reventure
Revita
RIOT - Civil Unrest
Road 96
Roarr! Jurassic Edition
ROGUE LORDS
Roguebook
RollerCoaster Tycoon 2: Triple Thrill Pack
RPG Maker VX
Rubber Bandits
RUINER
Rym 9000
Saints Row
Sakura Dungeon, 18+
Sakura Knight, 18+
Sakura MMO, 18+
Sakura Knight 2, 18+
Sakura Knight 3, 18+
Sakura MMO 2, 18+
Sakura MMO 3, 18+
Sakura MMO Extra, 18+
Sakura Succubus, 18+
Sakura Succubus 2, 18+
Sakura Succubus 3, 18+
Sakura Succubus 4, 18+
Sakura Succubus 5, 18+
Sakura Succubus 6, 18+
Sakura Swim Club, 18+
Sam & Max: Devil's Playhouse
Scorn
SCP : Secret Files
Secret Neighbor: Hello Neighbor Multiplayer
SEUM: Speedrunners from Hell
Shadow of the Tomb Raider
Shady Part of Me
Shing!
Shotgun King: The Final Checkmate
Sid Meier's Railroads!
Siege Survival: Gloria Victis
Skullgirls 2nd Encore
Slinger VR
Smile For Me
Sniper Elite 3
Sniper Elite 4
Snowtopia
Sorcerer King: Rivals
Soul Searching
Soulblight
Souldiers
Soulstice
Spellcaster University
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark
Spirit of the Island
Stacking
Starbound
Starpoint Gemini Warlords
State of Decay: Year-One Survival Edition (steam inventory gift)
Stirring Abyss
Strider
Stygian: Reign of the Old Ones
SuchArt!
Sunlight
Super Chicken Catchers
Super Magbot
Super Star (delisted)
SUPERHOT: MIND CONTROL DELETE
Surviving the Aftermath
Sword Legacy Omen
SYMMETRYro
Tails Noir
Tainted Grail: Conquest
Telefrag VR
TEMTEM
The Amazing American Circus
The Ascent
The Beast Inside
The Dark Pictures Anthology: Man of Medan
The Dark Pictures Anthology: House of Ashes
The Dark Pictures Anthology: Little Hope
The Deed II
The Dungeon Of Naheulbeuk: The Amulet Of Chaos
The Golf Club 2019 Featuring PGA TOUR
The Gunk
The Legend of Tianding
The Life and Suffering of Sir Brante
The Long Dark
The Outer Worlds: Spacer's Choice Edition
The Pale Beyond
The Quarry
The Red Lantern
The Serpent Rogue
The USB Stick Found in the Grass
The Witcher: Enhanced Edition (steam inventory gift)
The Witness
The Wolf Among Us
There Is No Light
Ticket to Ride
Tin Can
Titan Souls
TOEM
Tools Up!
Townsmen - A Kingdom Rebuilt
Traffic Jams
Train Station Renovation
Treasure Hunter Simulator
Trek to Yomi
Tribes of Midgard
Turbo Overkill
Twilight Struggle
Twin Mirror
Two Point Campus
Ultimate Chicken Horse
Underland: The Climb
Unity of Command: Stalingrad Campaign
UnMetal
Vanishing Realms
War for the Overworld
Warhammer 40,000: Chaos Gate - Daemonhunters
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf - Drenn Redblade
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf - Exceptional Card Pack
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf - Saga of the Great Awakening
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf - Wrath of the Damned
Warhammer Age of Sigmar: Realms of Ruin Ultimate Edition
WARSAW
We Happy Few Season Pass
We Were Here Too
Where the Water Tastes Like Wine
White Noise 2
Who Pressed Mute on Uncle Marcus?
Wizard of Legend
Wobbledogs
Worms Rumble
WRC 7
WWE 2K BATTLEGROUNDS
XCOM 2
X-COM: Complete Pack (including X-COM: UFO Defense + X-COM: Apocalypse + X-COM: Enforcer + X-COM: Interceptor + X-COM: Terror from the Deep)
XCOM: Enemy Unknown Complete Edition
XEL
X-Morph: Defense Complete Pack (including X-Morph: Defense + X-Morph: Defense - European Assault + X-Morph: Defense - Survival Of The Fittest + X-Morph: Defense - Last Bastion)
Yakuza 4 Remastered
Zoeti
ΔV: Rings of Saturn
Other platforms:
Command & Conquer Remastered Collection (ORIGINkey)
Liberated (GOG key)
STAR WARS: Squadrons (Origin)
Wanderlust Travel Stories (GOG key)
#########################################################
My Wishlist: (prefer gift links)
Hi-Fi RUSH
DIABLO 4 PC
Street Fighter 6
Rocket League
Poker night
poker night 2
Game of Thrones - A Telltale Games Series
NBA 2k16, 2k17
WWE 2K16, 2K17, 2K18, 2K19, 2K20, 2k23
The Last Remnant
Doctor Who: The Adventure Games
Hell let loose
Crusader kings 3
Spiderman remaster
F1 2020, 2019, 2017, 2016, 2012, 2011
ACE COMBAT ASSAULT HORIZON Enhanced Edition
DARK SOULS
DARK SOULS II
DARK SOULS III
Pistol Whip
CLANNAD
Automobilista 2
Gears 5
monster hunter rise
Tiny tina's wonderlands chaotic great edition
Spyro Reignited Trilogy
DIRT 5
Fable Anniversary
Nioh 2 COMPLETE
Victoria 3
HUMANKIND
A Hat in Time
VTOL VR
rFactor 2
ZERO Sievert
Barotrauma
monster hunter world
fight in tight space
Life Is Strange Complete Season
phoenix wright
LOOT RIVER
satisfactory
Gotham Knights
Rivals of Aether
Vrising
DOOM Eternal
Deep Rock Galactic
LegionTD 2
Dead by Daylight
quantum break
slay the spire
Yakuza kiwami 2
Stardew Valley
resident evil village
Eiyuden Chronicle: Rising
stray blade
clash: Artifacts of chaos
Valfaris: Mecha Therion
The Quarry
9 Years of Shadows
other humble choice title games
#########################################################
Note: for some games from humble I might ask for gift links. There is a rumor 3 years ago that humble bans users due to making gift links only. I make gift links every week, never have any issues. I have no idea why humble would ever ban its customers for using a feature it provides to its custimers.
Here is a guide how to make gift links from support.Humblebundle.com: https://support.humblebundle.com/hc/en-us/articles/202712460-Purchasing-and-Sending-Gifts
I do not believe humble teaches you how to make gift links, so it can ban you, lol
2024.05.13 22:34 Initial_Award9424 WIBTAH for breaking up with my boyfriend
I don't have anyone that I can talk to about this and I really need neutral opinions.
I 20f have been with my boyfriend 20m for about two years at this point. We've been friends for years before we started dating.
Over the past few weeks I noticed my lack of affection towards him. I don't feel like talking to him and I don't really want to be touched either. During the week we barely see each other because of work and uni and only see each other on friday nights. When those days come around, I tense up and catch myself unhappy about the fact that he's coming over, since it's usually always the same routine. He comes over, we cook (which only ever I pay for), watch a movie and sleep with each other if I decide it's okay. It sounds really harsh that I say "I decide" but I genuinely do not feel the urge to do so most days. It's not that it's terrible sex or one sided pleasure, I just feel so obligated to do so that it's no fun anymore. We've talked about seeing each other more often no strings attached but it eventually never works out because of schedules.
Another reason I struggle is his mom. She wallows in self pity because of her divorce literal years ago. He always has to keep her happy and entertained. It even gets so far that he goes running home even though we have set plans because his mom doesn't feel like cooking or walking the dog.
She blames me for ruining their trips because I got sick. I was never supposed to come but she just cancelled everything. When I once was at his house on my birthday she asked me about my plans for that night. When I told her that I was going out with some friends she just said "Well then let's hope you don't get sick again and we have to cancel our trip a second time this year." Another trip I was never meant to go on. I know that I'm not in relationship with HER but the fact that he didn't say anything still doesn't sit right with me.
He really tries to be involved in my life, whereas I try and keep everything separate; family, hobbies, boyfriend. It's what comforts me the most and I also just really feel like he's still too shy to match my very outgoing family after two years.
He's very caring and loving towards me and we respect each others boundaries but I can't help but feel like I'd rather go back to just being friends. The thought's been crossing my mind for some time now and I genuinely don't know if that's just something everyone goes through in a relationship. I used to be very jealous of seeing him with other girls but now it doesn't really bother me anymore. Some days when it's really bad, I hope he cheats on me so that I could leave him without being the cause.
So many things about him start to annoy me. It starts with the noise he makes when drinking water or sneezing and goes all the way to how he speaks foreign languages. Super dumb, I know!! But I just can't help it. I also feel like im neurodivergent for many other reason but the noises he makes-- UGHH
What I also find hard to handle is his attitude with money. We don't really go out together, maybe once every two months. It's never crazy expenses, usually under 40-50$, which is less than what I spend on our cooking every weekend. When we go out I always offer to pay or split the bill. He will then claim it's fine and that he's taking care of it, but when I asked him if he'd like to go to the fair, I was expected to pay for everything. I know I was the one that brought it up and usually it wouldn't be an issue but it was the way he said "why are you putting away your wallet, you have to pay for my food now." without even so much as a smirk that made me feel like a piggy bank or a way to another cheap meal.
My biggest issue would definitely be seeing him upset and likely losing him as my friend.
If I told him how I feel he'd not sleep for ages and love bomb me. Not in a toxic, but in a probably desperate way.
We've been each others firsts in so many different ways and he always talks about how he wants to marry me. I feel terrible that the thought of breaking up with him frequents my mind that much but I also feel like I owe it to myself to do whats best for me.
Thank you in advance!
submitted by Initial_Award9424 to AITAH [link] [comments]
I 20f have been with my boyfriend 20m for about two years at this point. We've been friends for years before we started dating.
Over the past few weeks I noticed my lack of affection towards him. I don't feel like talking to him and I don't really want to be touched either. During the week we barely see each other because of work and uni and only see each other on friday nights. When those days come around, I tense up and catch myself unhappy about the fact that he's coming over, since it's usually always the same routine. He comes over, we cook (which only ever I pay for), watch a movie and sleep with each other if I decide it's okay. It sounds really harsh that I say "I decide" but I genuinely do not feel the urge to do so most days. It's not that it's terrible sex or one sided pleasure, I just feel so obligated to do so that it's no fun anymore. We've talked about seeing each other more often no strings attached but it eventually never works out because of schedules.
Another reason I struggle is his mom. She wallows in self pity because of her divorce literal years ago. He always has to keep her happy and entertained. It even gets so far that he goes running home even though we have set plans because his mom doesn't feel like cooking or walking the dog.
She blames me for ruining their trips because I got sick. I was never supposed to come but she just cancelled everything. When I once was at his house on my birthday she asked me about my plans for that night. When I told her that I was going out with some friends she just said "Well then let's hope you don't get sick again and we have to cancel our trip a second time this year." Another trip I was never meant to go on. I know that I'm not in relationship with HER but the fact that he didn't say anything still doesn't sit right with me.
He really tries to be involved in my life, whereas I try and keep everything separate; family, hobbies, boyfriend. It's what comforts me the most and I also just really feel like he's still too shy to match my very outgoing family after two years.
He's very caring and loving towards me and we respect each others boundaries but I can't help but feel like I'd rather go back to just being friends. The thought's been crossing my mind for some time now and I genuinely don't know if that's just something everyone goes through in a relationship. I used to be very jealous of seeing him with other girls but now it doesn't really bother me anymore. Some days when it's really bad, I hope he cheats on me so that I could leave him without being the cause.
So many things about him start to annoy me. It starts with the noise he makes when drinking water or sneezing and goes all the way to how he speaks foreign languages. Super dumb, I know!! But I just can't help it. I also feel like im neurodivergent for many other reason but the noises he makes-- UGHH
What I also find hard to handle is his attitude with money. We don't really go out together, maybe once every two months. It's never crazy expenses, usually under 40-50$, which is less than what I spend on our cooking every weekend. When we go out I always offer to pay or split the bill. He will then claim it's fine and that he's taking care of it, but when I asked him if he'd like to go to the fair, I was expected to pay for everything. I know I was the one that brought it up and usually it wouldn't be an issue but it was the way he said "why are you putting away your wallet, you have to pay for my food now." without even so much as a smirk that made me feel like a piggy bank or a way to another cheap meal.
My biggest issue would definitely be seeing him upset and likely losing him as my friend.
If I told him how I feel he'd not sleep for ages and love bomb me. Not in a toxic, but in a probably desperate way.
We've been each others firsts in so many different ways and he always talks about how he wants to marry me. I feel terrible that the thought of breaking up with him frequents my mind that much but I also feel like I owe it to myself to do whats best for me.
Thank you in advance!
2024.05.13 22:34 Jerry_217 [H] Lots of games NEW: Turbo Overkill, Littlewood, DEVOUR, Amnesia:The Bunker, Astrea: Six-Sided Oracles, Wobbledogs [W] Hi-Fi rush, Yakuza LAD, hell let loose, Nioh 2, WWE 2k23, crusader kings 3, Crash Bandicoot, Spyro, Fable Anniversary, Poker night 1, 2, F1 2012, 2011, Euro/American Truck, tf2key
Region is NA.
If you have my wishlist games, Chat with me anytime. Only accept games from your own collection.
My REPs: 200+ successful trades, stopped tracking after 202.
My steam games for trade (wishlist in the end of this post):
Added recently:
Blade of DarknessStardew
Amanda the Adventurer
Bravery and Greed
King Of The Castle
Loddlenaut
Mediterranea Inferno
Steelrising
Yakuza: Like a Dragon
Coromon
Fashion Police Squad
HUMANKIND™ Definitive Edition
Symphony of War: The Nephilim Saga
Terraformers
The Callisto Protocol
The Excavation of Hob's Barrow
Victoria 3
Tomb Raider: Game of the Year Edition (GOG)
LEGO Star Wars III: The Clone Wars (GOG)
Littlewood
Astrea: Six-Sided Oracles
One Hand Clapping
Tainted Grail: Conquest
Shadow of the Tomb Raider
Ultimate Chicken Horse
Mad Max
MORTAL KOMBAT XL
Mortal Kombat 11: Ultimate
Middle-earth: Shadow of Mordor GOTY
Middle-Earth: Shadow of War Definitive Edition
Injustice 2 Legendary Edition
Gotham Knights
Back 4 Blood
Batman™: Arkham Knight Premium Edition
Batman™: Arkham Asylum GOTY Edition
Batman™: Arkham City GOTY Edition
Batman™: Arkham Origins
.hack//G.U. Last Recode
CODE VEIN
GOD EATER 3
Katamari Damacy REROLL
PAC-MAN MUSEUM+
Tales of Vesperia: Definitive Edition
TEKKEN 7
Dragon Knight (delisted, 18+, PM for price)
Hell Girls (delisted, 18+, PM for price)
Super Star (delisted, 18+, PM for price)
Steam games:
9 Years of ShadowsA Juggler's Tale
A Plague Tale: Innocence
ABZU
Aces and Adventures
Ad Infinitum
Afterimage
Agent in Depth
Alchemist's Castle
Alchemy Garden
Aliens vs. Predator Collection ( includes Aliens vs. Predator + Aliens vs Predator Swarm Map Pack + Aliens vs Predator: Bug Hunt Pack)
Aliens: Fireteam Elite
AMID EVIL
Amnesia: The Bunker
Among Us
Anuchard
Aragami 2
Arcade Paradise
Arise: A Simple Story
Armello
Army Men RTS
Assault Suit Leynos
Astrea: Six-Sided Oracles
Astronarch
Autonauts vs Piratebots
Battlecruisers
Beacon Pines
Big Pharma
BIOMUTANT
Bionic Commando Rearmed
Black Paradox
Black Skylands
Blade Assault
Blade of Darkness
Blood And Zombies
Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night
Borderlands 3: Super Deluxe Edition
Boundless
BPM: Bullets Per Minute
Brawlout
Castle on the Coast
Cats in Time
Caveblazers
Chicka Wars Chicken Meat (delisted)
Children of Silentown
CHIVALRY 2 - EPIC EDITION
Citizen Sleeper
CivCity: Rome
Click and Slay
Colt Canyon
Conan Chop Chop
Concept Destruction
Construction Simulator (2015) Deluxe Edition
Cookie Cutter
Corridor Z
Cosmonautica
Crayon Physics Deluxe
CROSSBOW: Bloodnight
Cultist Simulator
Curse of the Dead Gods
Dagon - The Eldritch Box DLC
Dark Deity
Dead Age
Dear Esther: Landmark Edition
Death Squared
Deceive Inc.
Demonologist
Depraved
Descenders
Desperados III
Destiny 2: Beyond Light DLC
Destroy All Humans! 2 - Reprobed
Destroyer: The U-Boat Hunter
Detached: Non-VR Edition
DEVOUR
Dicey Dungeons
Disciples: Liberation
Disco Elysium - The Final Cut
Dishonored Definitive Edition
Distant Worlds Universe
Doctor Strange Defenders Skin
Double Cross
Doughlings: Arcade
Doughlings: Invasion
Dragon Knight (delisted, 18+)
Dragon's Dogma: Dark Arisen
Draw Slasher
Drawful 2
Due Process
Dungeons 2 - Complete Edition
Dusk
EDGE OF ETERNITY
Eiyuden Chronicle: Rising
El Hijo
Emily is Away <3
Encased
Endless Space 2
Epic Chef
ETERNAL THREADS
Exorder
Expeditions: Rome
F1 2018
Farming Simulator 17
Firegirl: Hack 'n Splash Rescue
First Class Trouble
Five Dates
Fling to the Finish
Fobia - St. Dinfna Hotel
Foretales
FOREWARNED
Forged Battalion
Fortissimo FA INTL Ver
Founders' Fortune
Friends vs Friends
From Space
Full Metal Furies
Fun with Ragdolls: The Game
GameGuru Classic
Garfield Kart - Furious Racing
Generation Zero
Geometric Sniper
Ghost 1.0
Gloria Victis
Go Home Dinosaurs!
Going Under
Golf Gang
Good knight
GRID Ultimate Edition
GRIME
Grow: Song of the Evertree
Guilty Gear X2 #Reload
Guns & Fishes
Guts and Glory
Hack 'n' Slash bundle (including Hack 'n' Slash + Hack 'n' Slash Soundtrack + Spacebase GIFT)
Halcyon 6: Lightspeed Edition
Hardspace: Shipbreaker
Heart Fragment - Book Two: Belief Fragments (Shannon & Lana)
Hedon Bloodrite
Hell Girls (delisted, 18+)
Hell Pie
Hellbound
HERO'S HOUR
Hidden & Dangerous 2: Courage Under Fire
Hidden & Dangerous: Action Pack
Hokko Life
Hollow Knight
Honey, I Joined a Cult
Hot Brass
Hotshot Racing
How to Sing to Open Your Heart
Hyper Gunsport
I’m not a Monster
Internet Cafe Simulator
Interplanetary: Enhanced Edition
Intravenous
Intruders: Hide and Seek
Iron Danger
Iron Harvest
Izmir: An Independence Simulator
Joggernauts
Joggernauts
JURASSIC WORLD EVOLUTION 2
Just Cause 3 XXL Edition
Just Cause 4 Complete Edition
JYDGE
Kerbal Space Program
Killsquad
King's Bounty II
Kraken Academy!!
Labirinto 2
Lacuna – A Sci-Fi Noir Adventure
Last Call BBS
Last Oasis
Late Shift
Lawn Mowing Simulator
Legend of Keepers
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Let Them Come
Life is Strange 2 Complete Season (incl. Mascot Bundle DLC)
Little Misfortune
Little Orpheus
Lords and Villeins
Lost Planet 3 Complete Pack
Lost Ruins
Lust for Darkness
Lust from Beyond: M Edition
MageQuit
Maid of Sker
Mainlining
MEEPLE STATION
Meow Express
Merchant of the Skies
Metal: Hellsinger
Metro Exodus
Midnight Fight Express
Midnight Ghost Hunt
Mini Metro
Mini motor Racing EVO (delisted)
MirrorMoon EP
Monster Prom 2: Monster Camp
Monster Sanctuary
Moon Hunters
Moonlighter
Morbid: The Seven Acolytes
Motorcycle Mechanic Simulator 2021
Moving Out - Movers in Paradise DLC
Mr. Prepper
Murder by Numbers
My Friendly Neighborhood
My Time At Portia
Mythic Ocean
Nadir: A Grimdark Deckbuilder
Necromunda Hired Gun
NecroWorm
NeuroVoider
Neverinth
Neverout
New Super Luckys Tale
Nickelodeon All Star Brawl
Nobody Saves the World
Non-Stop Raiders
Northgard
Oaken
Obduction
Of Orcs And Men
Offworld Trading Company
OLLIOLLI WORLD - RAD EDITION
One Hand Clapping
Orbital Racer
Othercide
Out of Reach: Treasure Royale
Outward Definitive Edition
Outward The Soroboreans DLC + soundtrack (DLC only)
Override
Overture
Ozymandias
Paint the Town Red
Partial Control
Patch Quest
Pathfinder: Kingmaker Enhanced Plus Edition (NA only) + Royal Ascension DLC + The Wildcards DLC
Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous - Enhanced Edition
Pathfinders: Memories
Pathway
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
Per Asperatrar
Pilgrims
Pill Baby
Pixplode
Planet TD
PlataGO!
Port Royale 3 Gold
PowerBeatsVR
Prodeus
Project CARS (delisted)
Project Chemistry
Project Nimbus: Complete Edition
Project Wingman
Propagation VR - Co-op
Propnight
Proteus
Proteus
PULSAR: The Lost Colony
Pumped BMX +
Quadrata
Quantum Break
Radio Commander
Ragnarock
Railroad Corporation
Railroad Tycoon 3
Rain World
Rebel Inc: Escalation
Rebound Dodgeball Evolved
Re-Legion
Remnant: From the Ashes - Complete Edition
Remnants of Naezith
Resident Evil Revelations
Resident Evil Revelations 2
Reventure
Revita
RIOT - Civil Unrest
Road 96
Roarr! Jurassic Edition
ROGUE LORDS
Roguebook
RollerCoaster Tycoon 2: Triple Thrill Pack
RPG Maker VX
Rubber Bandits
RUINER
Rym 9000
Saints Row
Sakura Dungeon, 18+
Sakura Knight, 18+
Sakura MMO, 18+
Sakura Knight 2, 18+
Sakura Knight 3, 18+
Sakura MMO 2, 18+
Sakura MMO 3, 18+
Sakura MMO Extra, 18+
Sakura Succubus, 18+
Sakura Succubus 2, 18+
Sakura Succubus 3, 18+
Sakura Succubus 4, 18+
Sakura Succubus 5, 18+
Sakura Succubus 6, 18+
Sakura Swim Club, 18+
Sam & Max: Devil's Playhouse
Scorn
SCP : Secret Files
Secret Neighbor: Hello Neighbor Multiplayer
SEUM: Speedrunners from Hell
Shadow of the Tomb Raider
Shady Part of Me
Shing!
Shotgun King: The Final Checkmate
Sid Meier's Railroads!
Siege Survival: Gloria Victis
Skullgirls 2nd Encore
Slinger VR
Smile For Me
Sniper Elite 3
Sniper Elite 4
Snowtopia
Sorcerer King: Rivals
Soul Searching
Soulblight
Souldiers
Soulstice
Spellcaster University
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark
Spirit of the Island
Stacking
Starbound
Starpoint Gemini Warlords
State of Decay: Year-One Survival Edition (steam inventory gift)
Stirring Abyss
Strider
Stygian: Reign of the Old Ones
SuchArt!
Sunlight
Super Chicken Catchers
Super Magbot
Super Star (delisted)
SUPERHOT: MIND CONTROL DELETE
Surviving the Aftermath
Sword Legacy Omen
SYMMETRYro
Tails Noir
Tainted Grail: Conquest
Telefrag VR
TEMTEM
The Amazing American Circus
The Ascent
The Beast Inside
The Dark Pictures Anthology: Man of Medan
The Dark Pictures Anthology: House of Ashes
The Dark Pictures Anthology: Little Hope
The Deed II
The Dungeon Of Naheulbeuk: The Amulet Of Chaos
The Golf Club 2019 Featuring PGA TOUR
The Gunk
The Legend of Tianding
The Life and Suffering of Sir Brante
The Long Dark
The Outer Worlds: Spacer's Choice Edition
The Pale Beyond
The Quarry
The Red Lantern
The Serpent Rogue
The USB Stick Found in the Grass
The Witcher: Enhanced Edition (steam inventory gift)
The Witness
The Wolf Among Us
There Is No Light
Ticket to Ride
Tin Can
Titan Souls
TOEM
Tools Up!
Townsmen - A Kingdom Rebuilt
Traffic Jams
Train Station Renovation
Treasure Hunter Simulator
Trek to Yomi
Tribes of Midgard
Turbo Overkill
Twilight Struggle
Twin Mirror
Two Point Campus
Ultimate Chicken Horse
Underland: The Climb
Unity of Command: Stalingrad Campaign
UnMetal
Vanishing Realms
War for the Overworld
Warhammer 40,000: Chaos Gate - Daemonhunters
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf - Drenn Redblade
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf - Exceptional Card Pack
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf - Saga of the Great Awakening
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf - Wrath of the Damned
Warhammer Age of Sigmar: Realms of Ruin Ultimate Edition
WARSAW
We Happy Few Season Pass
We Were Here Too
Where the Water Tastes Like Wine
White Noise 2
Who Pressed Mute on Uncle Marcus?
Wizard of Legend
Wobbledogs
Worms Rumble
WRC 7
WWE 2K BATTLEGROUNDS
XCOM 2
X-COM: Complete Pack (including X-COM: UFO Defense + X-COM: Apocalypse + X-COM: Enforcer + X-COM: Interceptor + X-COM: Terror from the Deep)
XCOM: Enemy Unknown Complete Edition
XEL
X-Morph: Defense Complete Pack (including X-Morph: Defense + X-Morph: Defense - European Assault + X-Morph: Defense - Survival Of The Fittest + X-Morph: Defense - Last Bastion)
Yakuza 4 Remastered
Zoeti
ΔV: Rings of Saturn
Other platforms:
Command & Conquer Remastered Collection (ORIGINkey)
Liberated (GOG key)
STAR WARS: Squadrons (Origin)
Wanderlust Travel Stories (GOG key)
#########################################################
My Wishlist: (prefer gift links)
Hi-Fi RUSH
DIABLO 4 PC
Street Fighter 6
Rocket League
Poker night
poker night 2
Game of Thrones - A Telltale Games Series
NBA 2k16, 2k17
WWE 2K16, 2K17, 2K18, 2K19, 2K20, 2k23
The Last Remnant
Doctor Who: The Adventure Games
Hell let loose
Crusader kings 3
Spiderman remaster
F1 2020, 2019, 2017, 2016, 2012, 2011
ACE COMBAT ASSAULT HORIZON Enhanced Edition
DARK SOULS
DARK SOULS II
DARK SOULS III
Pistol Whip
CLANNAD
Automobilista 2
Gears 5
monster hunter rise
Tiny tina's wonderlands chaotic great edition
Spyro Reignited Trilogy
DIRT 5
Fable Anniversary
Nioh 2 COMPLETE
Victoria 3
HUMANKIND
A Hat in Time
VTOL VR
rFactor 2
ZERO Sievert
Barotrauma
monster hunter world
fight in tight space
Life Is Strange Complete Season
phoenix wright
LOOT RIVER
satisfactory
Gotham Knights
Rivals of Aether
Vrising
DOOM Eternal
Deep Rock Galactic
LegionTD 2
Dead by Daylight
quantum break
slay the spire
Yakuza kiwami 2
Stardew Valley
resident evil village
Eiyuden Chronicle: Rising
stray blade
clash: Artifacts of chaos
Valfaris: Mecha Therion
The Quarry
9 Years of Shadows
other humble choice title games
#########################################################