Swollen feeling around temples

I 26m have had a slow start in my adult life and really only got my shit together 2 years ago. I have always had a bad relationship with money and am currently realizing just how bad it is.
I am not one who overspends, I’m quite the opposite and that’s my issue. I’ve been able to save a good chunk of money + fund some investments in the last two years but I am always worried about money. I’ve been more focused on saving money in the last two years and really don’t make a ton of money to begin with.
I have been in a 2 year relationship and my girlfriend and I live together. She is 21 and in college which she pays for herself so I am funding 100% of rent and utilities, she gets groceries. I take her out on dates a few nights a week and pay for 80% of what we do. She offers every time and is so kind but I always turn her down unless she absolutely insists and I think it’s cheap enough to where I put my male ego down and let her pay.
We go on little local trips each year that don’t really cost anything and one big trip where it isn’t cheap. I have never at any point in my relationship told my girlfriend not to order something, what to eat/drink, or denied going out to a place due to price. Ever. I have the money and we don’t go away too often so I don’t care to spend.
Last night we met two groups of fiends who just so happened to be in the same city we were for dinnedrinks, and then a club to cap off the night. She was overly concerned about how much I spent on the night for us ($300) not bad and kept saying thank you all night + asking every time I paid “are you sure, I can help”
On our walk back to our Airbnb, I asked her why she kept doing this and she in a very kind way said “I know you don’t like to spend and I get worried when you do” then mentioned how she doesn’t suggest we go to nice places when we are back home and orders water because she is nervous about stressing me out financially. I asked her if she thinks I’m cheap and without saying it she said yes through various ways of trying to explain around it. Or at least that’s all I heard.
That hurt my heart and my ego a ton. I was just quiet for the rest of the walk home and said I was going to bed due to the drinks.
She is very considerate, thankful, and kind but this comment hurt because it wasn’t regarding our night out but our life in general. How do I emotionally handle this as an adult and move past this? Money has always been a sensitive subject for me and a good way to hit me where it hurts emotionally. I don’t want to be viewed as incapable, weak, or like a cannot provide financially. I know, it’s a me issue.
I do everything I can for us and getting inadvertently called cheap really hurt my feelings. What should I do here?

Hey guys,
I'd just like to get some opinions on whether I'm kidding myself about how reasonable this is or not.
My partner is an actor. He is a lovely, gentle, genuinely kind human who I'm madly in love with (despite being a widower, who never thought she'd be going down this road again!)
When we met a few years go, he was on the most insanely restrictive diet you can imagine. It was just absurd. Yes, it was vegan, but it went beyond that. We never at out because he had a dietician to plan everything that went in his mouth. We had to carry around a small suitcase full of blenders with all his supplements and powders.
This was all because he was preparing for a role in a new series that required him to be shredded basically. He also suffers mental health issues, and found this kind of routine and training good for him.
It actually wasn't such a bad way to live! We just cooked at home, saved loads of money, and I never had to worry about being the "awkward vegan gf" because I do vegan Keto myself.
By the time they'd shot the first season, he was exhausted. Obviously, it was a totally unsustainable way to live. He got better when he started eating just regular vegan meals.
But now the show's been picked up for a few more seasons and part of his contract is that his appearance can't change, meaning, he has to be in that shape again for another 7 months while they shoot. He's decided he simply can't do it vegan, because they travel all over the world, and there are a lot of meals out / on the road. He says he thinks he'll burn out and the idea of doing it again is giving him panic attacks.
I understand that this is his dream, and I want to be supportive. But I also feel like, veganism isn't something you just "switch off" when it's inconvenient. I asked if he could find a cook / trainer through the production company but he already has one, who specialises in a different skillset he needs to learn.
I'm really confused. I don't expect anyone to stay vegan it's bad for their health. I can't help but feel like it's vanity, even though I know this is something he's worked his whole life to achieve, and is scared of losing it.
What do you think? Does it say something about him I should take as a red flag? Or accept that he isn't perfect and try and stick it out. I don't think I could ever watch him eat meat. But I also don't want to lose him, and understand this was a hard choice.

So there have been few posts asking why do people stay with abusers and it got me thinking why I stay with mine. I'm 25 so old enough to get a job and move out, but yet here I am still with my abusive mom and sibling. I realized I don't have enough motivation to actually set goals and see them through long enough to actually get a job and see myself through on my plans. On a rational level I know I would be better off if I move out and I want independence and my own space so much, but on emotional level I'm just stuck. I apply for a job one day and then crash the next, or I get rejected and then my week flews by not doing much, etc. I did work part time during college, but it was always less pressure bc it was part time and I always felt like I could quit and get another similar job. But now it just feels like the stakes are higher and I go into freeze mode, especially when considering moving once and for all and going into rent.
I feel like it's mainly due to being subtly abused, such as being put down, criticized, gaslighted, etc. and told I don't know how to do basic things such as chores without my mom ever giving me the chance to actually do it and learn by myself. But interestingly enough, I was always able to function well under pressure, such as timelines in schools or at deadlines at jobs. From the outside I seem very capable and have good feedback from people, but from the inside, my own head and my family, I'm always told I'm not good enough and can't do shit so I feel like I don't even try or give up too soon because I don't trust myself enough to actually believe something will change. And when I'm faced with huge decision, such as moving away and going into rent world, I just freeze due to fear and overhwelm. Hell, sometimes even small decisions cause me to freeze and avoid.
One thing that I've noticed since I've started my trauma work and as I was examining my family is that my uncle (mom's younger brother) is basically same. He graduated college but never had a job and stayed with my grandma all of his life until she died. As a kid, he was always the joke of the family and I never understood why he simply didn't get a job and move out, but know I'm scared I might end up the same way. Especially since I was always the faulty kid, constantly criticized, attacked and blamed for everything and still am while older sister was the favourite until she moved out and then younger sister became the favourite. I feel like my mom replicated the dynamics she saw as a kid and I know my grandma was pretty cold and distant as a person so I wouldn't be shocked she was toxic as hell (I never really knew her well).
Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any advice from people who were in similar situations. Like I want to move out so badly and move on with my life bc I'm getting tired of sitting around the house and feeling like I'm wasting my life being stuck on my trauma, but at the same time it's hard to get started and actually stay consistent.

So there have been few posts asking why do people stay with abusers and it got me thinking why I stay with mine. I'm 25 so old enough to get a job and move out, but yet here I am still with my abusive mom and sibling. I realized I don't have enough motivation to actually set goals and see them through long enough to actually get a job and see myself through on my plans. On a rational level I know I would be better off if I move out and I want independence and my own space so much, but on emotional level I'm just stuck. I apply for a job one day and then crash the next, or I get rejected and then my week flews by not doing much, etc. I did work part time during college, but it was always less pressure bc it was part time and I always felt like I could quit and get another similar job. But now it just feels like the stakes are higher and I go into freeze mode, especially when considering moving once and for all and going into rent.
I feel like it's mainly due to being subtly abused, such as being put down, criticized, gaslighted, etc. and told I don't know how to do basic things such as chores without my mom ever giving me the chance to actually do it and learn by myself. But interestingly enough, I was always able to function well under pressure, such as timelines in schools or at deadlines at jobs. From the outside I seem very capable and have good feedback from people, but from the inside, my own head and my family, I'm always told I'm not good enough and can't do shit so I feel like I don't even try or give up too soon because I don't trust myself enough to actually believe something will change. And when I'm faced with huge decision, such as moving away and going into rent world, I just freeze due to fear and overhwelm. Hell, sometimes even small decisions cause me to freeze and avoid.
One thing that I've noticed since I've started my trauma work and as I was examining my family is that my uncle (mom's younger brother) is basically same. He graduated college but never had a job and stayed with my grandma all of his life until she died. As a kid, he was always the joke of the family and I never understood why he simply didn't get a job and move out, but know I'm scared I might end up the same way. Especially since I was always the faulty kid, constantly criticized, attacked and blamed for everything and still am while older sister was the favourite until she moved out and then younger sister became the favourite. I feel like my mom replicated the dynamics she saw as a kid and I know my grandma was pretty cold and distant as a person so I wouldn't be shocked she was toxic as hell (I never really knew her well).
Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any advice from people who were in similar situations. Like I want to move out so badly and move on with my life bc I'm getting tired of sitting around the house and feeling like I'm wasting my life being stuck on my trauma, but at the same time it's hard to get started and actually stay consistent.

I made this a while ago just for myself, but someone asked me to post it when I said I had a mix going from the 120s to the 170s, so figured I'd share it here too.
Aritmya - Hey Man (Impose Mix)
Xpansions 95 - Move Your Body (Tony De Vit Mix)
Itchy & Scratchy - I Want U... (NRG Mix)
The Shaker - Strong to Survive
Eating Habits - May I Have The Mayonnaise
2 Bad Mice - Bombscare (UXB Mix)
Cagey Groove (Original Mix)
The Numerical Value - Krazy Noise (Instranormal Remix)
DJ Supreme - Tha Wildstyle (Klubbheads Hardstyle Mix)
Porn Kings - Up To No Good (Original Mix)
East 17 - Steam (P & C 2 Mix)
Baby Blue - Child (KLM Mix)
Joe Inferno - Tribal Church
Cosmopolitan - Cry Boy Tony De Vit Remix
Pianoman- Blurred (Original)
Point 2 - Wait 1 Minute
Montreal Sound - (Sure Of) You (Marc Kulak Remix)
Marmion - Schöneberg (Tony De Vit Mix)
Brain Bashers - Party Jumping (Original Mix)
Phunky Phantom - Get Up Stand Up (KLM Vocal Mix)
Technocat Featuring Tom Wilson - Technocat (Tony De Vit Mix)
Tall Paul - Rock Da House (Experts Remix)
Piano Pimps - Everybody (Magic Alecs Summertime Summit)
Moonman - Dont Be Afraid
Scooter - Fire Dub 1
Vincent de Moor - Flowtation (Original Mix)
Quench - Dreams (Tony De Vit Mix)
DOP Ft Lorna Marshall - Manifest Your Love Tooley St Dub
The Shaker - Mooncat Bonesys Hand Spear Vocal Mix
Deeper Cut - Organ Grinder
Felix - Dont You Want Me (Candy Girls Remix)
Artemesia - Bits + Pieces (Tony De Vit Mix)
99th Floor Elevators featuring Tony De Vit - Hooked (Tony De Vit remix)
Handbaggers - U Found Out (Tony De Vit Mix)
Quartz Lock Featuring Lonnie Gordon - Love Eviction (Tony De Vit V2 Remix)
Chakka Boom Bang - Tossing And Turning (Tony De Vit Mix)
Funkydory - Goodtimes 96 (Tony De Vit Mix)
Tony De Vit - Burning Up (Trade Club Mix)
Mrs. Wood - Joanna (Tony De Vit V2 Remix)
Signum - What Ya Got 4 Me (Original 12_ Vocal)
Movin Melodies – Indica (Original Mix)
Dj Ablaze - One More
Tom Wax & Jan Jacarta - Wormhole
UK Gold - Nuclear Shower (UK Gold remix)
rachel auburn - machine man (Original Mix)
Cadenza - Rock Your Enemies
DJ Misjah & DJ Tim - Access
Tony De Vit - Feel The Love
Antic – The Ultimate (Original Mix)
Feel The Rush (Evil Bass Remix)
Incisions - Beyond Motion (Chocis Choice Mix)
Fargetta - Music Is Moving (Tony De Vit Mix)
Outlander - The Vamp (Tony De Vit Remix)
Mrs. Ping & Mr. Pong - Ping Pong (Fetzners Netzangabe Mix)
Age Of Love - The Age Of Love (Tony De Vit Remix)
Diddy - Give Me Love (Tony De Vit Mix)
E-Motion - Naughty North Sexy South (Tony De Vit Remix)
The Frank Foundation Project - Do Not Be Afraid (TDV Mix)
Knuckleheadz - House Rocca
Dyewitness - What Would You Like To Hear Again (Dancefloor Glory Remix)
The Experts – Take You There
Rizzo - Keep Ya Head On
Jens - Loops & Tings
Hampshire And Weatherley - Breathless (Tony De Vit Mix)
Louise - Naked (Tony De Vit Remix)
E-trax - Lets Rock (Tony De Vit remix)
Dr Base – Blue Oyster
VTracks - Subway 26 (Tony De Vit Remix)
Cygnus X - Turn Around (Tony De Vit Trade Mix)
Version II - Skychilds Toccata (6am At Trade Mix)
Mark NRG - Brain Is The Weapon (Lexa Remix)
The Disciples – Underrave
DJ Eric Sneo - Forces Of Nature (Original Mix)
Tony De Vit - Resistance Is Futile
Tony De Vit - Splashdown (Original Mix)
Tony De Vit - The Dawn (Original Mix)
Tony De Vit - I Dont Care (Original Trade Mix)
Kleine Boiz - Eine Kleine Nacht Musik
Tony de Vit - Are You All Ready
https://soundcloud.com/user-665914143-387391396/tony-de-vit-tribute-mix-78-tracks-he-played-live-1-he-didnt

Skin always dehydrated
I’m on 0.025 of tretinoin and using on bare skin then waiting 30 mins to do serum, gel moisturiser and then occlusive moisturiser. I’m doing this every other day. Should I reduce this wait time?

• aveeno oat serum/purito centella -soon Jung emulsion -no7 100 hour hydration cream
• aveeno oat face wash -no other actives or exfoliating

On the acne side the frequency and bare skin has nearly cleared me up. Still getting new spots though every month but they seem to be going away quicker than before. I suspect I’m still getting a few spots every month from my skin being dehydrated/damaged barrier. I have KP on the perimeters of my face which tret is slowly working through I’m not too worried about that I know it’s super stubborn but I don’t know if that’s a factor? As that can get dry easily.
It’s more my skin just looks and feels bad? I’m certain it’s just dehydrated because I feel tight and sore all the time. Looks and feels irritated with the usual tell tells of large pores, greasy skin (causing blocked pores), redness, fine lines around eyes and on my cheeks. My skin just doesn’t retain moisture as soon as I finish applying my skincare and hour later I’m back to being tight and irritated.
I’m very generous and consistent with my moisturising and drinking water. Cut caffeine, alcohol, junk etc. Use a humidifier and don’t use heating anymore or take hot showers.
I just wanted to know will it end? is there anything that will hydrate my skin and keep it like that while I’m using tret or is this just part of using tret? If so I don’t think I can use long term as I’ve just switched one issue for another and it’s such a pain in my actual lifestyle to only get very average results.
Any advice/products or even treatments would be great as I feel like every step forward I take 2 back. I really want to stick through to a year before I make a decision on whether to quit (4 months in now).

Hi.
I've tried my best to be as accurate as possible but from my memory this is how things have transpired:
My partner and I have been together for a few years. We got together during the early days of pandemic through talking online and became each others one person following the rule in our country at the time. I became unexpectedly pregnant and decided to keep the baby and we now have a 2 year old. I moved in to live with him so we could raise the baby together.
Maybe a year ago a woman who he had met on a dating site and been on a couple of dates with decided to move to our city. She asked for help from my partner with finding accommodation, lifts here and there etc. I think I had a couple of casual questions at the time about it but I honestly was ok with it. He went to meet her the first time in our city and actually took our son (I think i could have gone if I wanted but chose to stay home and catch up on cleaning or something like that). I was happy afterwards when he showed me a photo of her olding him. She looked nice. Nice people around us and in our city is a good thing in my book! I believed him that nothing was going on.
We all went on a few walks together. I liked her! Though I did see her as more my partner's friend.
Then one day my partner had plans to go on a walk with her and I asked if I could join and he goes 'ill ask her'. I did feel a bit taken aback, like... Shouldn't his partners wants come before hers? Why would she have a problem with me joining anyway?
She replied that she wanted to meet either my partner or my partner with our son. Did not want me to come. I was pretty upset and my partner ended up cancelling on her. We had to go on about our day as we have to care for our two year old but later on when he was asleep we talked about it again. I asked if I could see their messages and he said no. Maybe half an hour later I asked again and he said that he had deleted them which just made me cry my eyes out as it totally seemed like something a guilty person would do.
However with more talking he eventually said that she had some personal stuff going on that she just wanted to talk to him about. I suddenly felt better as if that was the case it was something I understood. I'm very much the kind of person that struggles to open up so just having one person you wanted to talk to about private matters is something I understood. I was a bit perplexed at my partner for not just saying that in the first place. I didn't need to know the details just that she had something going on.
I think they had one more meeting which I was ok with and asked how it went out of concern for someone going through something.
The next time they had plans to meet I asked again if I could go and was told no again. I became upset and asked if I was never going to be allowed to join them again. He cancelled.
They tried to arrange more meetings after that but id cry and he would cancel and now to my knowledge they do not meet at all.
The whole thing has left me feeling quite insecure.
Lately he has been meeting up with a female friend who he knows through a hobby. I have absolutely no doubt there is anything between them but friendship. She has a young baby with a partner of her own. I've met her before. Mostly they meet up and do their hobby. Yesterday he mentioned meeting her today and I had a sudden thought that maybe saying he is meeting up with her is his way of hiding meeting up with the previous woman because he knows I would probably choose not to come for his hobby. I impulsively asked if I could join and he said sure so I was relieved but said that actually I would try to get some gardening done as I haven't done any for a little while. This morning before he left, he asked again and then asked if I never wanted to go and I couldnt lie. He guessed I was worrying about the previous woman and became annoyed with me.
I feel like it's his fault for me being insecure about her for how he handled that situation.
So, if anyone reads that. Am i in the wrong?

I tried to post this on one of the relationship subs, but it wouldn't let me.
Both my girlfriend and I are in our late-twenties. I'm male-to-female trans, bi and autistic. She is cis female, neurotypical and bi. We have been togheter for 3 years and are living togheter.
I grew up in a religious military family, my dad was emotionally absent or away on exercises or deplyoments. I went off the rails a bit once I discovered my first sense of freedom in my early twenties. Now I am just angry and ashamed over it.
When I moved out of my parents home I had a bit of a hoe phase, basically around 20 guys that I had sex with or did sexual stuff with. I realised that it was not good for me and stopped, I never kissed a girl until I met my girlfriend. I was very shy and not quite knowing what to do with her (autistic and mtf) so she guided me along. Because of my inexperience with women she always just assumed I was very inexperienced in general. We've had some talk about our dating experiences and I just said I had some bad experiences on grindtinder and left it at that. I was ashamed of what I had done and lied to her and said that I just met up with a couple of guys and either left after meeting them or that they pressured me into a blowjob or sex. That I deleted the app after. I did not really want to talk about this with her because I did not want to listen to her experiences either.
What basically happened is that in my country we had a 4 day weekend not too long ago and at one of the parties we had gone to, three guys that I had sex with where there and basically loudly started talking about me, my girlfriend got upset hearing them and started shouting at them before I just begged her to go home with me to sober up.
She's been distant with me after we had a talk over it. She asked me why I lied, all I could say was that I was ashamed for it. That those guys had used me and that they never cared about me as a person. On the other hand I feel angry at her, she has literally talked to me about how caring about b0dy counts is stupid and misogynist, It's not like she has never done anything before me either. At first I was apologetic over me lying but when I told her about that she's been short with me since. I apologized later. Our friend group was originally hers and they've mostly taken her side. Some of them have been understanding, but are still telling me I fucked up. Which I know I have.
I'm clean and I got tested for up to a year after I quit grindtinder. I made a series of mistakes and once I realized that I quit, but now I've fucked up even harder with my gf. This has been the first big fight we've had and I don't know what to do.
TLDR: I lied to my girlfriend about my past because of my own shame and now she is angry and disgusted with me. I have never had a long term relationship before and don't know what to do.

So there have been few posts asking why do people stay with abusers and it got me thinking why I stay with mine. I'm 25 so old enough to get a job and move out, but yet here I am still with my abusive mom and sibling. I realized I don't have enough motivation to actually set goals and see them through long enough to actually get a job and see myself through on my plans. On a rational level I know I would be better off if I move out and I want independence and my own space so much, but on emotional level I'm just stuck. I apply for a job one day and then crash the next, or I get rejected and then my week flews by not doing much, etc. I did work part time during college, but it was always less pressure bc it was part time and I always felt like I could quit and get another similar job. But now it just feels like the stakes are higher and I go into freeze mode, especially when considering moving once and for all and going into rent.
I feel like it's mainly due to being subtly abused, such as being put down, criticized, gaslighted, etc. and told I don't know how to do basic things such as chores without my mom ever giving me the chance to actually do it and learn by myself. But interestingly enough, I was always able to function well under pressure, such as timelines in schools or at deadlines at jobs. From the outside I seem very capable and have good feedback from people, but from the inside, my own head and my family, I'm always told I'm not good enough and can't do shit so I feel like I don't even try or give up too soon because I don't trust myself enough to actually believe something will change. And when I'm faced with huge decision, such as moving away and going into rent world, I just freeze due to fear and overhwelm. Hell, sometimes even small decisions cause me to freeze and avoid.
One thing that I've noticed since I've started my trauma work and as I was examining my family is that my uncle (mom's younger brother) is basically same. He graduated college but never had a job and stayed with my grandma all of his life until she died. As a kid, he was always the joke of the family and I never understood why he simply didn't get a job and move out, but know I'm scared I might end up the same way. Especially since I was always the faulty kid, constantly criticized, attacked and blamed for everything and still am while older sister was the favourite until she moved out and then younger sister became the favourite. I feel like my mom replicated the dynamics she saw as a kid and I know my grandma was pretty cold and distant as a person so I wouldn't be shocked she was toxic as hell (I never really knew her well).
Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any advice from people who were in similar situations. Like I want to move out so badly and move on with my life bc I'm getting tired of sitting around the house and feeling like I'm wasting my life being stuck on my trauma, but at the same time it's hard to get started and actually stay consistent.

Hey team, I need your advice please. My partner and I are conflict averse so im still shaking even with small confrontation.
We live in a townhouse with council street pocket parks dotted around where we parked one of our seldom used car along with other neighbours’ cars (also seldom used. (We rotate once in a while). Been like this for almost 2 years that we lived here.
Just this pm, our new neighbour came knocking saying we should be moving our car since it’s been 5 weeks and nobody has moved. He has 4 cars and he wants to park there. I told him there are other car parks less than 50mtrs away but apparently he wants the one facing our houses.
Told him we have valid rego and wof and he should be complaining to the council. And that WE should be reporting them to the council for parking on the footpath so close to the entrance of our driveway (less than 1mtr).
He said it’s his property, actually no- that’s the footpath + broken yellow line + parking almost blocking our driveway.
Do you think the council can tow us parking in public park without any restriction signage?
Now we feel rattled with and not particularly at peace living next to them.
Thanks team!

Does anyone else exaggerate their pain so that people actually believe you? I've had chronic back pain for 11 years that started on a backpacking trip, it happened out of nowhere I was just hiking down the trail like normal then boom back pain that hasn't stopped since, basically the skin on about a baseball size area on my upper back to the left of my spine is completely numb but deeper underneath the skin it is very painful, it feels like something is lodged in there and needs to be pulled out (I don't think there's actually anything in there but that's the sensation if that makes sense). I think I might have slipped or pulled something but so far I've been unsuccessful in getting a diagnosis or treatment. I can't even get a doctor to consider looking into it the most I've gotten is "hmm that's weird you should exercise more" which I already do plenty of it's one of the reasons that I often get dismissed because "how could youl feel that bad but still be able to do X or Y activity". I get through the harder days with weed and liqour (I know this isn't the right answer) to make it more bearable but I havent been for a bit and can't again for a while since my wife is about to have our baby and I need to be able to drive her to the hospital and take care of a newborn sober. My wife and a few friends know about it and are very supportive and help me when it's too painful for me to function but other than them basically no one believes that I'm in agony most days because I don't look like it. I've started to exaggerate my symptoms since I don't look naturally "hurt" enough. I have good days and sometimes even good weeks where the pain is reduced however the numbness is always there, the numbness doesn't affect me much it's more annoying than anything. When I can I like to be active, backpacking, hiking, weightlifting, mountain biking, just a lot of high intensity activities that seem to make people think I can't be in pain since I'm being that active, I can do these things when the pain is bad but only if I'm high or drunk so that the pain doesn't bother me. It's gotten to the point where I make it a point multiple times a day to complain about it and just look miserable, basically act like I did back when the pain first started before I learned how to control how I reacted to it. It's not for sympathy or anything but it feels good when the people around me acknowledge what I'm going through rather than downplay it because i don't look like I'm in pain. Tbh it's getting mentally exhausting but I don't want to go back to being told "you don't look like it's that bad" all the time. Does anyone else do this?

After reading the article, it looks like another misleading headline designed to generate buzz by the sales team at the WSJ.
But I still want to be cautious in my strategy and mitigate any risks.
Curious what do others think of the article?
The article needs a subscription, so I pasted the text below.
Wall Street went on a home-buying spree. Now, more lawmakers want to stop it from ever happening again.
Democrats in the U.S. Senate and House have sponsored legislation that would force large owners of single-family homes to sell houses to family buyers. A Republican’s bill in the Ohio state legislature aims to drive out institutional owners through heavy taxation.
Lawmakers in Nebraska, California, New York, Minnesota and North Carolina are among those proposing similar laws.
While homeowner associations for years have sought to stop investors from buying and renting out houses in their neighborhoods, the legislative proposals represent a new effort by elected officials to regulate Wall Street’s appetite for single-family homes.
These lawmakers say that investors that have scooped up hundreds of thousands of houses to rent out are contributing to the dearth of homes for sale and driving up home prices. They argue that investor buying has made it harder for first-time buyers to compete with Wall Street-backed investment firms and their all-cash offers.
Wall Street went on a home-buying spree. Now, more lawmakers want to stop it from ever happening again.
Democrats in the U.S. Senate and House have sponsored legislation that would force large owners of single-family homes to sell houses to family buyers. A Republican’s bill in the Ohio state legislature aims to drive out institutional owners through heavy taxation.
Lawmakers in Nebraska, California, New York, Minnesota and North Carolina are among those proposing similar laws.
While homeowner associations for years have sought to stop investors from buying and renting out houses in their neighborhoods, the legislative proposals represent a new effort by elected officials to regulate Wall Street’s appetite for single-family homes.
These lawmakers say that investors that have scooped up hundreds of thousands of houses to rent out are contributing to the dearth of homes for sale and driving up home prices. They argue that investor buying has made it harder for first-time buyers to compete with Wall Street-backed investment firms and their all-cash offers.
Share of single-family homes purchased by investors, by portfolio sizeSource: John Burns Research and ConsultingNote: Quarterly data measures the trailing 12 months. iBuyers are a type of house flipper.2016'17'18'19'20'21'22'23'2402.55.07.510.012.515.017.520.022.525.027.5%iBuyers1,000+ home companies100-99910-991-91-9 1Q 2017 18%
Investors of all sizes spent billions of dollars buying homes during the pandemic. At the 2022 peak, they bought more than one in every four single-family homes sold, though more recently their activity has slowed as interest rates rose and supply became tighter. Two of the largest home-buying firms, Invitation Homes and AMH, are publicly traded companies, while a number of other companies, backed by private equity, hold portfolios of tens of thousands of homes nationwide.
Companies that buy single-family homes say their businesses provide renters the opportunity to live in desirable neighborhoods where they otherwise couldn’t afford to buy.
With home prices and rents near record highs around the U.S., legislators and officials at all levels of government have become more active on housing issues. States have passed new measures to fund more affordable housing, to allow builders to bypass local zoning laws and to make the eviction process more favorable to tenants.
Most calls to block large companies from snapping up homes come from liberals, but some conservatives also show an inclination to crack down.
This “corporate large-scale buying of residential homes seems to be distorting the market and making it harder for the average Texan to purchase a home,” Republican Gov. Greg Abbott wrote on X last month. “This must be added to the legislative agenda to protect Texas families.”
Close to equal numbers of voting-age Republicans and Democrats said they would support a measure to block Wall Street firms from buying homes, according to a new study funded by the University of California, Santa Barbara, and the Manhattan Institute, a conservative think tank. The study gauged opinion from 5,000 renters and homeowners in urban and suburban ZIP Codes.
Proposals to curb investors might be popular with voters, but so far they haven’t gained much traction in legislatures. None of the bills in Congress or in any of the state houses has reached a floor vote.
Advocates for the single-family rental industry, such as the National Rental Home Council, oppose such legislation and blame rising prices on an undersupply of new-construction homes. They also point to the relatively low number of homes owned by institutional investors, defined as those companies with portfolios of 1,000 homes or more. Some research estimates these companies own 3% to 5% of American rental homes.
In some American cities, institutional investors hold a much larger share of homes than they hold nationally. In Atlanta, nearly 11% of all rental homes in the five-county area are now owned by three real-estate companies, a recent study by researchers at Georgia State University found. A 2022 analysis by the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development said 21% of Atlanta rental homes were owned by some large institution.
Rep. Nikema Williams (D., Ga.), from the Atlanta area, in December co-sponsored the End Hedge Fund Control of American Homes Act in the U.S. House. The act “won’t solve all of the problems, but it will definitely make an impact,” she said in an interview.
Critics of regulation note that many of the largest investors have bought very few or no homes in the past year. “The great trade is done,” said John Burns, founder of the eponymous housing research and consulting firm. “So what are you trying to stop?”
Smaller investors that own between 10 and 99 homes have stepped up their share of home buying this year, Burns said. Some of the proposed legislation would also target these smaller investors.
The bills in the House and Senate would cap rental-home ownership at no more than 50 homes for many companies, requiring them to sell off any more they already own. A bill in Minnesota, meanwhile, would limit ownership to 20 homes.
Bills to block landlords in the Ohio and Nebraska state legislatures were written in response to a small number of investors buying up hundreds of homes in a handful of Cincinnati and Omaha neighborhoods.
Louis Blessing III, a Republican representing suburbs of Cincinnati in the Ohio Senate, introduced a bill to tax large landlords so heavily that they would likely feel compelled to sell their properties. Blessing said he is concerned about real-estate companies developing monopoly power in some neighborhoods, while putting starter homes further out of reach for home buyers.
“It’s an antitrust in spirit bill,” he said.

This is a follow-up post to this one - https://www.reddit.com/ElectricUnicycle/comments/16oc5bi/best_vented_motocross_helmet/
I feel I need to share my findings after a while, and thanks guys for all your helmet model suggestions. Below are my observations about the helmets I've tried.
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LS2 X-Force
Ventilation: great
Weight: good, around 1300g in XL and above
So far, I have tried all the sizes from XL to 3XL and the shell shape or so appeared terrible to my head shape. Even in 3XL there was something on the upper part of the head that made pressure to my skull after 10 minutes or so in the helmet. So I had to return it back to the shop, unfortunately. In addition, where my photochrome glasses go into the helmet there is not soft padding, but hard foam, so even the glasses with thin arms pressed quite noticeably in those areas.
Same shell shape thing with the older and cheaper model, LS2 Subverter Evo, tried wearing it in another shop. To my surprise, the LS2 adventure models such as Pioneer Evo seem to have another shell shape that fits my head much better.
​
Nolan N30-4VP
Ventilation: awesome
Weight: good, around 1300g in XXL
This one is maybe the best vented moto helmet I know. But don't get me wrong, the LS2s are maybe the same or very slightly less vented. Anyway, with this one I literally feel the air moving.
Regarding the issues, this one is also not perfect. First, no peak, so I had to handcraft my own rear mirror on a stick that is still not that securely mounted as I can when using the peak and a screw. Hope a Pidzoom's mirror could help.
Secondly, the strap, it's pushing my Adam's Apple even though I've lengthened it to its maximum. No idea what else I can do.
Thirdly, I don't trust the chinbar much, no cheek pads that keep the chinbar away from my chin, due to the chinbar is removable. And, the chinbar is too close to my chin anyway. So, in my test when I hit the chinbar hardly, it reaches my chin, wondering how it could be in a real crash, also wondering how it passed ECE 22.06 which has explicit tests for the chinbar.
Also, there is again little space for my glasses, they're pressing too much in the temple area.
A good thing is that I ordered and installed the shorter and narrower visor from N30-4 TP, so I don't need to wear glasses anymore.
Another noticeable thing regarding the weight is that it's top-heavy, all other helmets I have worn in my life had more even weight distribution. But it's a cool-looking helmet, with a microlock instead of double D-ring closure, which is quite convenient!
​
Leatt Moto 2.5
Just not the lightest in my size XL, around 1350 or so, despite what is stated on the product page. Tried it in a shop, not sure about the ventilation, appears a little bit bulky, so I wasn't sold. A good price though.
​
Now I'm looking where to find and try the Leatt Moto 9.5 and Leatt MTB 8.0 (this one, while technically not being a motorcycle helmet, passes ECE 22.05 tests, it's just can't be formally certified when called a bicycle helmet, according to the rules). Again, same as for 2.5, I'm not sure about the ventilation, the vents don't look too generous, any real feedback is appreciated.

So there have been few posts asking why do people stay with abusers and it got me thinking why I stay with mine. I'm 25 so old enough to get a job and move out, but yet here I am still with my abusive mom and sibling. I realized I don't have enough motivation to actually set goals and see them through long enough to actually get a job and see myself through on my plans. On a rational level I know I would be better off if I move out and I want independence and my own space so much, but on emotional level I'm just stuck. I apply for a job one day and then crash the next, or I get rejected and then my week flews by not doing much, etc. I did work part time during college, but it was always less pressure bc it was part time and I always felt like I could quit and get another similar job. But now it just feels like the stakes are higher and I go into freeze mode, especially when considering moving once and for all and going into rent.
I feel like it's mainly due to being subtly abused, such as being put down, criticized, gaslighted, etc. and told I don't know how to do basic things such as chores without my mom ever giving me the chance to actually do it and learn by myself. But interestingly enough, I was always able to function well under pressure, such as timelines in schools or at deadlines at jobs. From the outside I seem very capable and have good feedback from people, but from the inside, my own head and my family, I'm always told I'm not good enough and can't do shit so I feel like I don't even try or give up too soon because I don't trust myself enough to actually believe something will change. And when I'm faced with huge decision, such as moving away and going into rent world, I just freeze due to fear and overhwelm. Hell, sometimes even small decisions cause me to freeze and avoid.
One thing that I've noticed since I've started my trauma work and as I was examining my family is that my uncle (mom's younger brother) is basically same. He graduated college but never had a job and stayed with my grandma all of his life until she died. As a kid, he was always the joke of the family and I never understood why he simply didn't get a job and move out, but know I'm scared I might end up the same way. Especially since I was always the faulty kid, constantly criticized, attacked and blamed for everything and still am while older sister was the favourite until she moved out and then younger sister became the favourite. I feel like my mom replicated the dynamics she saw as a kid and I know my grandma was pretty cold and distant as a person so I wouldn't be shocked she was toxic as hell (I never really knew her well).
Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any advice from people who were in similar situations. Like I want to move out so badly and move on with my life bc I'm getting tired of sitting around the house and feeling like I'm wasting my life being stuck on my trauma, but at the same time it's hard to get started and actually stay consistent.

Don't know about anyone else, but I feel really deflated and more than a bit anxious about how Ange reacted in the presser last night.
It's a complex situation but I think the focus on the fans and their reaction to the loss are a little overblown. "Inside and outside" the club is where Ange is saying the problems are.
The fans; obviously the situation we were faced with last night was a strange one. Dumb luck with scheduling left us in a position where this was our game in hand. We were mathematically still chasing Champions League but were still banking on Crystal Palace doing us a favour. If Liverpool hadn't rolled over in the last 10 minutes against Villa, then I think the dynamic of last night's game in terms of the fans attitude would have been much different. If we'd won the game, Champions League would have felt genuinely within reach, but with Villa snatching a draw, I think most of us felt that fourth was as good as settled. That left us in a position where beating City would have, realistically done nothing more than hand Arsenal the title whilst not changing anything in regards to our own position in the table. Just a shitty situation to be in.
We've got a lot of foreign fans in the sub and on social media and genuinely, they wouldn't have any idea of the genuine rivalry with Arsenal. Admittedly, I'm not a local but I've been following Spurs for over 30 years and have managed to afford to get to a handful of games. I know enough and I still, despite not being there in person, grasp the depth of the rivalry. I wasn't going to land into work this morning and get ripped to shreds by Arsenal fans, but I still appreciate that that is the reality for the local fan-base, and you guys, the match going fans for the most part, have a different experience from the majority of the fans who have been crowing on social media. This is football. I understand if Ange is pissed off with the fans last night, watching on TV, it was a strange atmosphere. I felt torn watching the game, when Sonny went through I was willing him to put it away, but when the keeper made the save, I felt an odd sense of relief. It was strange, strange experience watching the game last night, one I don't want to have to experience again anytime soon, because the joy in the game as a supporter is embracing the full throttle emotions of watching you team score big goals, in important games. The shitty thing about last night, the game, just wasn't important enough to warrant those emotions... like I said, Champions League football was as good as gone.
But "inside the club"? We can't be sure what this means, but Ange's presser last night felt eerily like Conte's did, eerily like Mourinho's did towards the end. It felt then, that they'd come to realise that the scope of their ambition wasn't going to be matched financially by the club. It felt like they'd come out of a meeting having been told that promises made were to be been reneged on. I don't feel like that's what we saw last night.
I think what Ange meant with his "last 48" hours comment was purely about mentality. Is it wild to think that there were jokes made around the club the last few days leading up to the game about what winning would mean? I don't think it's beyond reason to think a kit man, or a groundsman, or Doris from the ticket office, or Steve in the dining room wouldn't have made a comment here or there about how "winning isn't everything".
Like it or not, rivalry or not, Ange and the players are professionals. He wanted to win. He wanted us to beat City and put the pressure on Villa to get something at Palace and secure, somehow, in a season where nobody had any hopes for us, Champions League football. But the club maybe, the fans certainly, just didn't. Not at the end, not when we have already consoled ourselves that Champions League football wasn't "realistic" with Villa's draw at Liverpool.
At the final whistle some of the players didn't look all that annoyed. Pep was prancing around congratulating Son, flirtingly punching Romero - it was as though the team were content that everyone in the ground seemed perfectly comfortable with how the game panned out. And that's not a winning mentality. That's not the attitude that wins trophies, or brings success. The playing staff didn't look distraught, they didn't look like a team who had just missed out on Champions League football.
Apologies for the long post (especially if you made it this far). I thought we were brilliant last night. I don't remember anyone outperforming City in the manner we did in the first half. There were so many positives, one being Ange's ability to kill City's ability to dictate tempo by using Sarr as a false 9. We were fantastic and for me it was one of the most impressive performances of the season, especially considering injuries. But I get where Ange is coming from and I hope this was one of those games that we look back on as a turning point and acts as a catalyst for a long overdue change in the club's mentality.

(I'm might end up deleting this post but we'll see what happens) I’m a 16 year old female from Australia and I’ve been reading the Bible for a while now but even with everything I know I feel horrible. No one around me can help me with my faith because they don’t know God’s word. My mother claims to be Christian but she still chases this world for temporary pleasure, she even believes a rock can cure you of illnesses. And my Dad is an addict.
I feel alone. In blissful moments when I’m in prayer or reading scripture (I use an app called Youversion since they have a feature where someone reads scripture to you) I feel at peace like I can finally be at peace but I’m too attached to this world and I get angry a lot and I’m practically spoiled.
Whenever I can get what I want I end up feeling horrible, maybe I feel like people giving me stuff is a show of affection or something, idk. Like tonight: I wanted something and my mother ended up falling asleep then minutes later I find myself crying in my room (which I share with my sister) making this post. I know none of this will do anything good for me and it’s all making me more depressed.
I had a rough period through my life where I felt suicidal, but the Lord must've got me out of that mindset since I just got tired of the self harm. Barely anyone was there for at the time, people said they'd help me but it never happened.
I really want Christian friend so I have someone but I can’t find them. I’m starting to think my generation is so messed up to the point that no one wants to follow Jesus Christ. I did ask my sister to read the Bible with me on 1 or more occasions but she declined, saying: shed forget it or something like that.
It all feels hopeless. I know I have Jesus to talk to but I also would like someone to help me out with my faith. I feel isolated and alone and the environment I’m currently living in isn’t good for me.
I’m sorry for the long post but I can’t take this anymore. So, if the Lord lets it happen, please anyone help me. Please.
May God bless you all and keep you safe. Thank you.
P.S I'm not forcing anyone into anything, just to be clear, God bless you. ❤️

I’ve had an idea for a story floating around in my mind for many years now. The idea came from a really difficult time in my life around 12 years ago. Im not really sure how to explain it - I’m not writing exactly about how my life was back then, but the story is heavily based on this certain period of my life. I’ve been wanting to write this for years, but only now can I find the words to actually put it down on paper. The issue is just that whenever I work on it, I feel super depressed. The story isn’t really a happy one but I’d still like to write it because writing really helps me to process things and to get certain thoughts/feelings out of my brain when they’re stuck in my mind. I just feel super weird and very depressed after even an hour or two of writing and then I stop and don’t work on it anymore for like several weeks. How can I stop letting this story affect me so much? It really messes up my mood for the rest of the day when I work on it.

Before I get things started, I’d like to say that I(22M) am from a rather conservative country, I am a virgin, and this is my first relationship.
It’s been around 6 months since I started dating my 22F girlfriend, we have a 1000km distance, but we’re both students and are not financially independent yet. I just needed some advice as I just feel like this keeps going around my head and I’d like to articulate it better for myself while receiving advice from the more experienced people on this subreddit.
To start things off, This isn’t my girlfriend’s first relationship and she’s been in relationships for a while now, she started dating somewhat young (for my country at least, or maybe I have been too closed off to realize) and she said she’s had sex from a year or two and has had a few ex-boyfriends she’s mentioned to me before whom she slept with and she’s also had a few friends with benefits (I found out about this later)..
I knew she wasn’t a virgin before we started dating and It does not matter to me if she wasn’t a virgin, because she’s dating me and choosing me and I do have some self-confidence and am a bit secure with who I am to let it bother me much.
I love her a lot and would love if this relationship lasted a long time and even hope to marry her and build a home with her someday.
Around 2 months back, she told me that she did not want to sleep with me till we got married and when I first heard this, I was quite taken aback, especially since I didn’t think she cared much about that due to her history and I don’t care much about it either (I’ve had my share of mental issues and felt that it wouldn’t be right to date anyone with those level of issues, so decided to not date anyone till I met her..).
This turned into a somewhat large argument and we were supposed to have a few days free and were planning on talking and video calling for those days, but we ended up arguing a bit, I was just feeling very mentally messed up and trying to process everything and I did get a bit cold and kind of withdrew into myself.
When I asked her for the reason, she said she didn’t know and then later said that she wanted a serious relationship with me and “I’m not like her playboy ex-boyfriends”and that she “doesn’t want to introduce me as a person she slept with to her parents” and wants to “respect them by not sleeping with me” while these ideas aren’t too uncommon amongst the younger generation of my country, I didn’t think she would have such thoughts because then why do it with a few others and then not with me? (I don’t think I am entitled to sleep with her, nor do I feel it’s my right or anything like that, I wouldn’t want her to do anything with me if she doesn’t wish to, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I knew I forced someone into having sex with me when they don’t want to.)
When we went further into this discussion, she asked me if sex was something so important to me and if I just wanted her for her body and not for who she is and that kind of things, which made little sense to me, as why would I be in a LDR if I just wanted sex?
Anyways, after a while, she kept apologizing and was like if you want to we can do it. (and that wasn’t the conclusion I wanted, I just wanted her to tell me some real reason why she doesn’t want to do anything with me, I forgot to mention, but she called our relationship an online one and that hurt me quite a bit (she later said that she didn’t mean it that way and meant it as a LDR).
After a day or two, I kind of decided to just not think about it, because she just kept apologizing and I felt like I was hurting her by continuing the topic.
A few weeks after she talks about the house of some guy she was “more than friends with” I didn’t know about this before and thought she only had sex in relationships (again, my country is quite conservative and maybe I am too closed off** to have had considered this before) and that kind of got to me, because whenever she said anything about people wanting her only for her body and that kind of stuff, I kind of felt like she was coerced into sleeping with her ex-boyfriends (I understand that I might have tried to rationalize what was going on and made up stories), and imo a friends with benefits is where you just have sex and it’s quite consensual, to say the least.
Now, a week back, I just wanted to bring this topic up again and I kind of messed up with the timing as we both were quite tired and I hadn’t slept properly in a while.. at the same time, I was feeling a bit guilty because I did fantasize about sleeping with her when we met even though I agreed to her boundary.
She told me she was confused and why I still thought about this topic and stuff like that and she asked me if I “didn’t like anything else about her apart from her body” and “what would I do if she had any physical deformities and she couldn’t have sex with me”( she said this when we first spoke on this too), she then said that she isn’t a touch person like I am and me thinking about such things out of the blue is quite strange to her.
All this has kind of led me to feel like I am ugly (which I don’t feel anymore, apart from the occasional intrusive thought) and whether she doesn’t want to sleep with me because she thinks I’m not the right person for her or maybe she thinks I am not good enough and so on...
She later said that she doesn’t want to have sex because she hates her body and how she looks and that she is carrying trauma from her past relationships because her ex-boyfriends slept with her and left her, I obviously understand this.. till a few days later she again said that we wouldn’t have sex till marriage. So I don’t know what’s really going on in her mind. Is she uncomfortable with me?
I understand that this might be a “Me” problem or something I am doing wrong or just overthinking and over analysing things and ending up with a wrong conclusion. I’m just confused I guess.
TLDR: My long-distance girlfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me even though she has had sex before (She later (after a month, when asked) said it is because she hates her body*). I felt hurt by this and it makes me feel very unwanted. I love her and I want to be with her, but I keep thinking about this and it’s making me lose my self-esteem and confidence as I feel like I am not good enough.
*I felt not including this in the TLDR would make it seem as though I am only telling my side of the story
**by closed off I mean I’m quite introverted and just stay home a lot and my parents are somewhat strict too (her parents are much stricter btw)..
I don’t know what I should do, I love her and I understand where she’s coming from, but this is kind of eating at me, whenever I feel low or am having a slightly bad mental health day my feelings of being not good enough or not the right person or that I am not wanted keeps creeping back up and starts shaving away at my self-esteem and the more I think about it the worse I feel.
Should I just stop thinking about this and pretend everything is okay with me? Am I not understanding enough? Do you think I can do something better? Should I talk about this topic again? (my girlfriend has exams for a few weeks now, so I would most likely hold off the topic until then, at the same time I might go to see her in June and I don’t know how that would work if we have such a conversation before this.)

Gemini male has avoided me for a few days. We have been flirting etc for a few months and we both started to get feelings but he wouldn’t take any initiative. I got sick of waiting around and started talking to someone else as they expressed interest in me which he now knows about.. I told him last week that me and this new guy were going on a walk to get to know eachother etc on the weekend. I spoke to him over a call this morning to see if he was okay and if we were okay as I hadn’t heard from him. He was a bit funny and then was asking me lots of questions about my weekend and straight out asked me if I’d seen this other guy, is he still texting me etc.. he seemed bothered? Is this why he didn’t reach out to me for a few days as he normally calls me as we are still friends? I’m not sure if he was worried that it was getting serious with this other guy and that I’d slept with him? I told him I didn’t meet up with the other guy after as there was a change in plans and he looked slightly relieved.

Ever since I joined Reddit, I've noticed a trend that's hard to ignore. It seems like every time a man dares to express his preferences in relationships or arranged marriage, he's instantly labeled as a misogynist. It's frustrating, to say the least.
But here's the thing: having preferences doesn't make you a bad person. Whether it's wanting someone with a clean past or a homemaker, it's okay to know what you want in a partner.
So, to all the men out there, I say this: be proud of your preferences. Don't let anyone make you feel ashamed for knowing what you want in a relationship. As some wise folks with two X chromosomes rightly say, if someone isn't adding value to your life, it's okay to move on.
Remember, having preferences doesn't make you insensitive or narrow-minded. It's about finding someone who aligns with you
And don't worry in your bad times your parents are there for you they won't let you fall in any circumstance
Around 10M million marriages take place every year in India don't feel that you should be with that girl if he's not adding any kind of value and ofc value should be according to you as you're choosing her.

Found a jumping spider in my kitchen yesterday. He is missing two legs on one side and the main front leg seems damaged on the same side. It can move it but the movements are definitely slower and more jerky.
I put him in a large Tupperware container with a base layer of coco coir and added some leaves so he could hide, and also added a small stick, then misted the coir until water beaded up a little on the surface and the sides of the container.
I have no idea how to take care of this thing. I don't want to release him because he struggles to get around and I feel like he wouldn't make it. If anybody has a guide or even a good article on best practices I'd appreciate it. I did see him by the water droplets on the side so I'm assuming he drank some, and he made it up to the top of the stick after a few minutes of trying.
Thanks for any help!

Been unemployed since mid December due to mental health and personal stuff happening. My mental health has been so bad that the only thing I manage to do is go to the gym most days, I have a girlfriend who i do stuff with abit on weekends but apart from that I have no friends or contact with anyone apart from my dad who I live with along with my girlfriend. I feel so stuck and overwhelmed like I can’t even imagine myself having a job again and being able to do normal stuff and my days are so empty just sitting around doing nothing I’m so fed up of it but the thought of working or going out to do much feels so overwhelming. Starting cbt in the next few weeks hoping this will help abit but just not sure what to do at all feel very lost. Want to move on with my life and get a house with my partner and she is employed and earns good money and I feel like I’m holding us back from getting on with our lives.