My stepdad: •The one big thing that makes me feel valid is that, when I was 11, my stepdad fingered me in my bedroom. I won't go in to too much detail or anything, it's unimportant. But the entire time he just stared at me and everything was silent, like he was waiting for my reaction. Our relationship has always been odd, so I wanted it. But eventually I got scared and told him something, I don't remember what it was but it got him to stop immediately and he apologised too. I don't remember much after, as in I don't know if he left my room or I left first, but I immediately went to the bathroom. Which was when I discovered I was bleeding.
•Around this time, for some strange reason I would repeatedly say to him "fuck me daddy." This would either be in person, or over messages. I remember once, when I was in school, I messaged him that. He told me to stop in case one of my friends saw. I don't know why he didn't tell me to stop for other reasons.
•One day, after telling him that in person, we were in my parents bedroom. I was sat on his bed and he was in front of me in his weird chair. He then started going in to detail about how I wanted him to fuck me, I can't remember exactly what he said, it was like I zoned out. Everytime I try to recall it now it literally feels like bugs start to crawl up me, I don't understand why. I remember the last part, and his really disgusting hushed and gentle voice. He asked if I wanted him to "cum inside of me", or he was just explaining how that would finish. I'm not really sure.
•Still around this same time period of me being 11-12, I would ask him to 'squish me.' The reason why we would call it that is because I would be on my back, my legs would be up all the way to where my head is and he would be on top of me in a way that would 'squish me'. Basically like that one sex position. I would usually be wearing my school uniform when that would happen, so a skirt. During the 'squishing', he would push down on me, so our crotches would basically be against eachother. I don't know why, but I would continuously ask him to 'squish me' and during it I would even say the whole "fuck me daddy" thing. Only recently have I realised that he was probably just pretending to fuck me.
•Other things had happened around that age too, like how we would talk about how many times we masturbated a day and compare it to eachother. Sometimes if I was abruptly going to my room, he would ask if I was going to go masturbate, since we were 'close like that' I would tell him. He would often recommend me NSFW Instagram model accounts. I was once tricked in to sending feet pics to this guy, which really isn't that serious and whenever I brought it up with friends they find it fucking hilarious. But the detail I always leave out is that, I did bring that up with my stepdad and he proceeded to tell me that he already knew. Which means he was spying on me through the crack of the door. If that already didn't bother me, I don't understand why he just allowed me to send those pictures, if he was watching why the hell didn't he stop me?
•I'm pretty sure this also happened around the age of 11 as well, recently, a memory resurfaced but I barely remember it. Basically, I was sucking on his neck. I don't remember who said it, but either him or my mum spoke up and laughed, saying that I needed to stop otherwise I would "give him a hickey." The reason why I wouldn't be surprised if my mum was in the room at the time is because she doesn't care about what he does. She knows everything and just doesn't fucking care.
•I'm very sure that, around that age, my parents begun to expose me to their loud sex. I wouldn't be surprised if it started even younger, however. Obviously, I tried to bring it up with them at the ripe old age of 11 and my mum immediately shot me down with a "it's natural." This only stopped recently, around this year, because I had a big panic attack over hearing them and my mum finally felt guilty. I started getting panic attacks over it the minute it started, maybe the panic attacks were a sign of the trauma when I was younger, but I'm convinced it is now. I heard it so many times that I began to get paranoid every night, I would start to hear it even if they weren't upstairs (I sound crazy, I know.) I would get so anxious every night in case I would hear it, to the point I started to really resent them from it. I know fine well I could just go to sleep before them, but sometimes they even woke me up with it, on numerous occasions.
•I'm convinced my stepdad wanted me to hear it. Around the time of it finally stopping, I got mad because i was hearing it again (I'm unsure if it was due to me hearing shit or they actually were) but it caused me to take my bedding and go downstairs to sleep. In the morning, I was rudely awoken to my stepdad slamming the door open and storming past. He's not usually like that when people are sleeping, so it instantly gave me the impression that he was pissed off and the only reason I can think of is that he was angry I wasn't there to listen.
•He used to tease me for my paranoia to. As a way to discourage them from getting intimate, I would leave my door open at night. This happened around this year, but I was doing that again and I messaged my stepdad if they were actually going to sleep. It then somehow turned to him making a dig about how he knew I gets anxious at night and when I asked why he sent me "In case me and your mam have sex. 😜" Before, I tried to resolve this issue by begging them to just tell me if they were gonna have sex or not so I could sleep downstairs (because I was gonna find out the hard way anyways.) And they kept on refusing? Which just gave me the impression that they wanted me to listen more.
•Around 11 again, he would often tell me details about his and my mums sex life. Like how he was always good at pulling out and the only time he would wear a condom is right when he was about to finish. But the reason why my sister came to be was because he just failed to pull out that one time and my mum refused to get an abortion. Another time, he went on about how him and my mother had sex during her period and how they had to use towels and they didn't enjoy it because it was too messy.
•I don't know if he did things before the age of 11, my memories are very faded and it's like there are major gaps throughout everything. I'm worried that he did, however. When I was very young, I remember having no accidents at all during the night. But then, around the ages of 9, I would have an accident basically every night and would get a lot of water infections. I know that's a classic sign of child sexual abuse, but I don't want to jump to conclusions or anything.
•Another reason as to why I believe more things had happened to me than what I know of is because I always seemed to know what sex was when I was young, but I wouldn't know the name or anything specific about it like how to get pregnant or what cum was. Though, even though I didn't know what it was, it was like I always thought about it, I could never not think about sex, it was disgusting. This stayed until I was around 13. I remember where I even asked my 'boyfriend' at the time, we were both around 8, if he wanted to have sex, and I have no idea why.
•Over the years, he would flash me frequently. Everytime, I would always believe it was an accident because he'd never acknowledge it, besides from that one time which he always jokes about it and blames me. Everytime he would flash me, it would either be because of a convenient hole in the crotch of his pants or because he was wearing very lose fit shorts and it would just be hanging out. The more I think about it, I'm very sure he would have been able to feel such a thing, especially when it was poking out of the hole, but it was like he was just oblivious.
•For some strange reason, when I was younger, I would make comments about small dicks. I don't know if I was commenting on his dick specifically, but he would always say the same thing. "Width matters more than length."
•Recently, around 16-17, he made a joke about how he listens to me masturbating. Once he noticed how shocked I looked, he then went on saying about how my vibrator is too quiet to hear.
•Around 17 again, I went to use the shower. The shower I use is the one that's connected to my parents room. When I locked the door, he got madish and started making comments about it. I had to defend myself, saying how 'the door would open on it's own if I didn't lock it'. Eventually, he backed off.
•I don't understand the point in the fucking door and lock to my bedroom anymore. Whenever I decided to lock my door, my parents start shouting at me through the walls, asking why I locked my door. My stepdad barely knocks, it's like a tap and he doesn't even wait sometimes. I remember seeing a past message from an old friend saying how he tried to walk in when I was changing and that he knew I was changing. I didn't explain myself, I really wish I did because I don't remember this.
•(Around 17.) We were messaging eachother and it somehow turned in to him hinting if I saw this one animated video, it was a porn one. I said no, and to that he sent me a screenshot of it. It wasn't anything bad or anything, just the start of it and nothing was revealing, he then asked if I was sure. And how he was surprised that I hadn't.
•(Around 17.) I don't really get my period, we still don't know why. But as I was getting a lot of blood tests, my stepdad was trying to check things off the list of what it could be. One of those being that my opening is just extremely tight I guess, because he asked if I ever tried penetrating myself. I admitted that I did, but I couldn't get it to exactly go in. Which he then decided to make a comment saying how It's just my 'technique'. I wonder if the only reason he asked that was to see if I ever tried anything out of morbid curiosity.
•(Around 17 again.) He randomly bought me dildo's once, I didn't ask him for them, he just bought them for me and it was wildly uncomfortable. Once he gave me them, he asked if I wanted him to show me how to use them. I said no, which he then said something about how if I ever did then I could ask him. I worry what would have happened if I did say yes.
•When I was around 14, I went glamping. I ended up having to share a bed with him. One of the nights, I woke up to his hand just on top my crotch. I tried grabbing it and moving it away but it just fell back down on to it. I don't know if he put it back there on purpose. I still question if it was a dream, I'm very sure it wasn't because I remember going back to sleep, but it still just bugs me.
•Around 17, I was upset for some reason and he was comforting me. During this, he randomly grabbed the inside of my thigh. I usually just wear a shirt and boxers, so he basically just grabbed my naked thigh but I don't know if he was doing it in a comforting way.
•Usually when I draw, I have my knees up to my chest so it's easier to use my tablet. Considering what I wear for pyjamas, I can always see him looking at my crotch when he comes in to my room. If he really can see everything I don't understand why he doesn't just tell me to put my legs down.
•He's made a lot of uncomfortable jokes over the years too. One of the ones that upsets me sometimes is that, when he was measuring me for a binder, I was constantly moving around because it was uncomfortable since I was just in a sports bra. As he was leaving, I think I told him about how it was uncomfortable for me or something along those lines. He then turned around and shouted "oh come on, it's not like i was fingerings your pussy or anything."
•Very recently, I asked him if I looked okay before going to college. After a bit of back and fourth he said "I wouldn't kick you out of bed, maybe you could find someone in college who would do the same."
•Other times when I asked him if I looked okay, he'd go on tangents about how my ass is great or how he would date me or be too nervous to talk to me if he was my age.
•One of the more recent jokes was when I dropped a mayonnaise lid on my lap. Nothing got on me, but my stepdad turned to me then turned to my mum and shouted "if anyone starts accusing us, just tell them it was mayonnaise!" Or something like that.
•I remember after we watched the new mean girls film, he started going on saying about how he wanted to rewatch it for the Halloween seen (if you know you know) for the 'panty action'. Which rubs me the wrong way because I'm very sure the girls are supposed to be around my age.
•I'm very sure he also made this fake account, pretending to be one of my old groomers that I tried to cut off, just to message me about nsfw topics and ask for pics. It's a whole long yap about paranoia and just suspicions so I won't get into it though. If I tried to provide all the evidence I have, it'll take forever and there's no point.
There's definitely way more things that he's said, joked and done. But I'm only now beginning to realise that they're not okay. Even when I was younger, I was sort of uncomfortable around the jokes so I would just zone out, leading me to not remembering them now.
My mum: •I remember when I was very young, around 11, we were in a store and she was obsessed with the idea of getting extra money. She wanted to do this online thing where she would dominate men or something, it was fucking weird. She went into detail about how she was researching it and instead of telling these men to so sexual stuff, she would make them do good things like pick up litter etc. When we were in this store, she made me look at the dog collars together and choose one out, I remember she even asked me if she thought it would be a good fit for the guys.
•She constantly goes on about her only fans now, I don't know why she wants me to know about it so much. She keeps on going into detail about what her plans are for photos and stuff and I just think it's very odd that she's telling me about it all. She's doing everything in her power to stop my brother from finding out, he's in his 20s, I don't understand why she's so happy to let their minor child know about it but not him. I remember when she was first starting it up, she got offended because I didn't want to wear a cosplay she used for one of her photoshoots. Another time she was going on about her plans for another cosplay thing, but this character happened to be a child, which I pointed out to be weird that she would think to do that. Her response to that was "yeah, if he was a girl." Like wtf.
•She wanted me to help take photos for her aswell, the thing is these were going to be out in public around a store that was really close to our home. She kept on saying it was fine if I didn't want to and that the photos weren't going to be sexual, but once I said no she seemed a bit upset. Which I don't understand because even if the photos aren't explicitly sexual, it's still a fetish thing that she wanted me to take pictures off. She also tends to take photos of her chest when other people are around. Like once I was sitting next to her and she just started taking photos of herself for her onlyfans, (I know this because I asked and she said that was what they were for), I'm just worried because I think I was in the frame a bit. Another time we were at my grandparents and she started taking obvious photos of her chest in front of me and my grandma. The thing that makes me feel sick is that she was wearing one of my shirts when taking them.
•I remember once which was also recent, she just randomly told me about how she was writing porn or something. I don't know why she felt the need to tell me that.
•She got mad when I wouldn't share my underwear with her. She tried to hide her anger but I could just tell she was frustrated when I said no. I remember her arguing with me, saying something like how she let's me share her clothes all the time. (Which isn't exactly true, she just gives me shirts that she doesn't want anymore from time to time.) I don't know if that's normal though and if anyone else shares their underwear with their parents. But I just think it's more uncomfortable than sharing clothes.
•My parents always used to expose me to their sex lives, I remember once when I was 11, after they finally stopped I heard my stepdad say a comment about how he liked the choker my mum was wearing. The thing is, the choker she was wearing was my choker. It's stupid because yeah it's just a choker, it's pretty far away from everything. But I hate the fact that she wore it during that, call me pathetic but I'm really sensitive to sex now. I never wore it since and even thinking of wearing it again makes me sort of upset.
•This isn't really major but when I was 14, I bugged her into buying me a new hoodie. Due to dysphoria and personal preference, I love really baggy hoodies. (I also needed it to be big enough because I needed it to be able to go over my blazer, stupid school rules it's too long to explain.) We got into a semi-argument over it and she kept on pressuring me to buy a more smaller size. She then said I needed to start 'showing off my body more' which I find really odd considering I was 14 at the time and why would I need to show it off.
•She would always ignore when people would catcall/harass me. I'm sure everyone is familiar with that, but I remember once after a man called me an ugly bitch for not acknowledging him when I was 11, when I went home my mum just played it down. Another time, when I was around the same age, I was being threatened by a bunch of pedophiles online. They kept on threatening me, saying how they were going to post my accounts on pornhub so people would come down, kidnap and rape me. When I showed my mum this, she defended them saying that they're probably just 16 year olds. Every time I would have a weird interaction with a man, she would say how we just have 'powers' to attract weird people and it's just who we are. Though I never see anyone else describe it like that and it just makes me feel like she enjoys when that happens to me and her.

AIO I Noticed (accidently) wife had vids of her showing her ass, in leggings, jeans, and in thong, also had vids of her with her sports bra/ cleavage and 1 nude recently ..scrolled and found these were for the last 2 yrs..claims to be sexually frustrated and she claims the content was for me and that she would forget to send them to me and claims they were for no one. The "i know what it looks like" treatment...
idk how to feel....i feel sick...help..

These are good as they help me keep the show in a little more perspective!
Paragliding accident - where’s YSR’s helmet?
How is her makeup still on after the accident and even going into RJH’s house? How does she have make up on even before he’s bought anything ?
So many clothes before she pawns the watch - did RJH really buy them all on her first day ? Given his inability to judge bra size impressed if he got the size of the other items - especially trousers - right ?
In Switzerland she’s shown as wearing knee high boots when taking the photo, but white sneakers when getting off the train to go to the bridge.
Coming home after candle at the marketplace. When YSR very nobly tries to pretend she lives elsewhere to not complicate things further for RJH with SD, she turns one way but then he’s holding her arm in the other way - continuity issues. (It was super romantic though how he made sure she was home safe even if it meant complicating things with SD!)
Rings not on in scenes near the end

Living in a suburban area of Europe, we had gotten us a pair of cute long hair Chihuahuas, which absolutely adored us. However, from time to time, my wife and me also wanted or needed to go to the movies or the theater without the dogs, sometimes even for a whole day, when we traveled to a city further away. To help us in these situations for a long time, we relied on relatives. However, as they were not directly around we decided, that we should get a dogsitter from the area.

So we setup a short ad in a local Facebook group as well as other local websites, looking for a dogsitter. Just a couple of days later, I received a WhatsApp message. A young woman from the neighboring village wrote she would be interested. She had experience with small dogs and availabilities on many weekends, as she was studying and needed time to learn and could use the cash. I talked to my wife and we decided to invite her for the next evening for an interview. She asked, whether we could time it according to the train schedule, because she did not have a car, and we were happy to oblige.

The next evening, just when I got home from work, the doorbell rang, and I opened the door to see a maybe 20 year old, roughly 1.7m tall sporty black women outside. Due to the summer heat she only wore jeans shorts and a tight fitting belly open top. This of course could not hide her D/DD breasts. "I am Becky, I'm here for the dogsitter position" she said, so I invited her in and took her to our deck, where my wife waited with our little fur babies. I immediately noticed, that Becky's eyes widened, when she saw my wife on the deck. As it was, as already mentioned, summer, my wife wore a black Bikini below a light, black beach dress. None of this could really hide her G-Cups and her petite but chubby/bbw figure. At first I thought she found my wife's dress to revealing, but closer examination showed, that it was more like she was checking her out.
While my wife asked Becky if she wanted something to drink, I excused myself for a second to get out of my work clothes into something more appropriate to the heat. I decided for a pair of beach shorts and a muscle shirt. When I got downstairs again after a few minutes, the two women were chatting and already the dogs seemed to like Becky. When Becky saw me she also seemed to have a closer look at my upper body and legs. (The regular swimming pays of nicely).
When we all were sitting around the table we asked Becky a couple of questions regarding her past experience with dogs and her general availability. She said, as she wasn't much of a party girl and preferred to focus on her studies, she is generally available most evenings and weekends. However of course she also has other clients as well and it's first come first serve with her. As we tend to plan our weekends often a couple of weeks in advance, this was not a problem for us. We also agreed on a per hour salary and agreed, that she could use our TV and everything whole she was at our place. Food however would be her own responsibility and she of course could not bring other friends into our house. As these were acceptable terms for everyone, we made a short contract everybody signed and we agreed on a first evening in two weeks time, when I needed to be on a business trip and my wife had a cinema evening with some of her friends .

Two weeks later, my wife called me in the evening after her cinema evening. She told me, that everything went well with Becky and the dogs. Unfortunately she had come home just a little to late for Becky to catch a train, and she would have had to wait for another hour for the next one. So she offered to take her home. As she had been out with the scooter, she had handed Becky a helmet and one of my motorbike jackets and away they went. At the beginning, Becky had held her around the waist, but my wife told me, that during driving, Becky's hands had slipped higher, so by the end it almost felt like she was holding her at the boob. But of course this could also be just a coincidence due to both of them wearing motorbike jackets and gloves. I jokingly suggested she had been groped and should think of appropriately punishment which she dismissed while turning on the TV. "Did you watch one of the porn channels?" she asked me out of the blue. "No I didn't, at least not in the last couple of months" I told her. We talk about stuff like this pretty open. "Interesting" she said. "That means it must have been Becky, who left it on. Maybe you were right about the groping after all". As it was already late, we told each other about our day and went to our respective beds.

For the next couple of months, nothing special happened. We booked Becky about once or twice a month, but when we came home, the TV was always set to normal channels and she also approached neither me nor my wife.
About half a year after we first hired her, my wife an me went on another date night. Unfortunately while still at dinner, before we could make it to our movie, I got an emergency phone call, that I needed to help in a really urgent situation in one of the nearby lakes. My wife didn't want to go to the movies alone, so I drove her home, loaded my diving gear in the car, kissed the wife goodbye and went on. While driving to the lake, I got a text from my wife: "Becky is naughty, I need to punish her." "Go for it" I answered without giving it to much thought.

When I was back from the emergency about 4 hours later, my wife was still awake, as she always is nervous and can't sleep, when I'm diving. But this time she also looked quite smirky. Then she told me the story.
She had entered the house, and was greeted by the dogs, but she did not see Becky, nor did Becky answer her calling through the house. She then went upstairs, just to find Becky watching porn a porn scene on our TV set, with two women pleasing each other while being fucked in turns by a sporty guy. Becky's trousers and panties were lying on the floor, as was her top. She was completely naked. All the while she was wearing noise canceling headphones and fucking herself with my wife's favorite vibrator, with my wife's buttplug in her ass. My wife was angry and turned on at the same time and after short hesitation she approached her.
I would have given anything to see the shock on Becky's face when my wife tapped her shoulder. She was so far in her own world, that she hadn't realized my wife was already home. "Please madame, please do not fire me, I'll do anything, anything" she stumbled. Anything?" my wife said, "We'll see about that". Now get my plug out off your ass and my vibrator out of your pussy and clean them thoroughly in the bathroom. And don't you dare putting on any clothes before I tell you. Becky did as she was told, and cleaned my wife's toys, while my wife made her way to the bedroom, removing her panties and here bra below her dress. Lying on the bed as if she was still fully clothed, she called in Becky: "Get your ass in here and close the door behind you little slut" she demanded and Becky obeyed, naked as she was. My wife grinned internally, her bisexual urges slowly taking over. "What were you thinking, masturbating with my toys in my living room" she asked and Becky got really defensive. "One of the dogs lost something below the bed, and when I looked down I found the vibrator and I git really horny. I don't have a boyfriend right now and my female friend I sometimes have sex with is on holiday, so I searched a little more and found your stuff, and then it all just happened to me, I did not know I was so needy, I already came 3 times and still couldn't stop."
"Did it occur to you, this stuff was none of your business?" my wife wanted to know, with Becky getting even more defensive. "I didn't mean to, I just got so horny…" "Get your face down between my legs" my wife demanded. Becky looked irate, "Do you want to keep your job?" Becky moved towards the bed pushing up my wife's dress and only now realizing, there was nothing underneath, and my wife's pussy was already starting to get wet. "Lick it or do you need another invitation" and Becky started licking. My wife had to admit she was really good at it and after a couple of minutes my wife came into her face. My wife got up, tossed the dress away and demanded "Now massage and lick my boobs" This time Becky instantly obeyed, got to her side and started pleasing my wife's G Cups. My wife meanwhile was a lot less gentle with Becky's Double Ds, slapping her nipples and massaging her rather hard. Becky moaned. "You like that? " my wife exclaimed, let's see about this. She inserted two of her fingers into Becky's pussy without further notice. Becky moaned once again, and my wife started fingerfucking her. "Put the vibrator into my pussy" she advised Becky who one again obeyed. The two of them went on for a couple of minutes before both of them came very hard. After they catched their breath again my wife told Becky: "You keep your job. But next time, you will come dressed as I say. " "Okay said Becky, got her clothes together and left.

I already got a huge boner, when my wife told me this scene , which she of course saw. She got it out of my pants started blowing it and said: "You like me fucking this young bitch?" "I do, I would have loved to watch and join in" I answered while she was getting on her knees. "Fuck my ass" she pleaded, and boy was I down for that. I got behind her, lubed my cock with a few thrusts into her pussy which already sent her moaning, before slowly sliding into her ass. Once in, I started fucking her slowly, while bending forward and also massaging her huge tits with my hands, making sure I got here nipples between my fingers. I wasn't to gentle. I was horny. I was massaging her tits with hard strokes of my hands while fucking her ass with passion and it took us just a few minutes till we both came.

We asked Becky in for the week after, telling her, my wife and me wanted to redo our date from the week before. However our real plans were a little different. My wife told her to wear a black nylon stocking, a maximum knee length black leather skirt and a black leathelatex top. She was not to wear a bra or panties. This was also a test, onto whether she was still willing to go down the route started the week before, or whether to drop this point for the future.
Also we on our side dressed a little more daring this time. My wife wore knee high leather boots together with a long black latex skirt, a black silk blouse and a black underbreast corsage, pushing her already large breasts even further up. With the blouse not fully closed you could almost see her nipples as she too was not wearing a bra or panties. Her dark hair combined with black lipstick and dark mascara, this style made her look like a queen of the night.
I myself went for a skintight black shirt, combined with a skin fit black leather jeans. To avoid accidents with the zipper, however I also wore black boxers below.
Becky ringed at the door on time as always. When I opened the door, I saw, that she had obeyed to my wife's instructions and she was looking hot. I also recognized, that she was looking at me, my outfit and also the developing bulge in my midst longer than necessary and definitely not disgusted but aroused.
I asked her in as always and she went into our entrance hall. My wife came downstairs looked at her and ordered her to lift the skirt. Becky obeyed and it was clear, she followed the instructions not to wear panties. "Okay" my wife told her. Becky's eyes had widened, when she saw my wife in her outfit. "You know the drill with the dogs. We already fed them, so just do the usual walks with them." Becky did not even flinch at the idea of walking through our neighborhood in these clothes. But well, she had been coming to our place on a train dressed like that.
Becky seemed almost disappointed when we left the house, but we wanted to go to dinner to rise our anticipation and we also wanted her hanging on the edge for a little longer. Instead we flirted with our waitress who seemed to be more interested in my upper body than my wife's. In low tone we traded some ideas, how to deal with Becky afterwards. We finally settled on a plan and after a good steak dinner and a bottle of wine, made our way back home. In the garage I took out my phone and checked on our bedroom cam, we sometimes use for "life shows" when one of us is on a business trip.

My wife then told me, she would wink at me, when I should come in, and made her way into the house. After the hello of the dogs had ended I could hear her "You, bedroom, now" in a harsh voice to Becky. It seemed like she obeyed instantly because just a few seconds later she appeared on my phones screen. My wife appeared behind her. "Judging from your dress, I think you want to hold your part of the deal?" "Yes, madame" was Becky's answer. "You know, we can just drop it, you continue as our dog sitter, and we play it like none of this ever happened. I am not mad at you" my wife checked to ensure Becky's consent to all of this. "Madame, this was the hottest night I had in months. I don't mind if we go on like this." "And are you also okay with my husband watching and joining in? He can see and hear you, but he is not recording" "Oh please, I would love that" Becky said. "Well, in that case, get rid of those stockings and lick my boots" my wife ordered and Becky obeyed. She started licking the boots and in that process of course her skirt fell onto her back and I had a perfect camera view of that surprisingly wide chocolate ass. I could hear a sound of surprise from below my wife's skirt, when Becky realized, my wife did not have any panties on.
My wife bent down a little and slapped Becky ass "You like that?" "Yes madame" Becky exclaimed. "Good, now get up and get me out of this blouse." When Becky started to get up my wife pulled Becky's top over her head, revealing her upper body. As she was standing with her back to the camera, I was not able to see her breasts. She wanted to open the corsage when my wife slapped her as again, this time s hard it left a handmark behind. "I told you the blouse, not the corsage." "Sorry madame" was all Becky said and she pulled the blouse out of the corsage, opened the buttons and freed those breasts I cherished so much. My wife turned herself and Becky around by ninety degrees, so I could start examining Becky's breasts as well. They were a lot smaller, but given her much skinnier, taller figure, the overall look of this young woman with enough ass and DDs was almost as arousing as my w's looks to me. "On your knees and lick my tits" my wife now commanded and Becky once more obeyed, only her short skirt just barely covering her ass and pussy. My wife pushed her upper body onto Becky's face, her head almost disappeared in between my wife's big milkers, only her long black hair visible. My wife moaned in anticipation and pulled her face back, pushing it to make her face the camera while still on her knees. "Last chance, If you want my husband to join, tell him now. If not, you can still say no, and nobody will be mad at you." My wife said in a much more soft voice, while still pulling Becky by her hair. "Please come and join us, Mister" Becky said into the camera.

I took that as the wink and turned down the camera, left the car and entered the house. By the time I entered the bedroom, Becky was still on her knees, but my wife's skirt now lay on the floor. Only in boots and the corsage, my wife with a slight bush around here pussy looked extremely hot. Becky was licking my wife's pussy like her life depended on it, and I already saw, that my wife's knees were about to get weak. A couple of seconds later a gasp left my wife's mouth, as she orgasmed and let herself fall backwards onto the bed, her breasts falling to both sides of her chest. What an arousing view. Becky also stared from her viewing point below. I grabbed here below her arms and pushed her onto my wife "Nobody told you to stop" I said with faked anger in my voice and Becks started to lick my wife's pussy again, kneeling in front of our bed. I walked over to our toy collection and grabbed a medium size buttplug and some lube. I made sure to lube it properly, while my wife pulled up Becky and made her lick her boobs once more. "I was told you like your ass stuffed" I said to Becky and her eyes widened when she saw what I had prepared for her. "Get that ass up in the air and pull the cheeks aside. But get rid of that skirt firs" I commanded. Becky obeyed while continuing to suck on my wife's tits. I could feel her body shiver from arousal and anticipation, when the tip of the plug touched her ass. It only took a slight push and in it went. My cock was now pushing against the trousers and my sweat started to get wet from my sweat, but I did not want to spoil anything for my wife. Both women were now on the bed and I placed myself behind Becky, and besides my wife's legs and started to carefully insert my left middle finger into my wife's pussy, searching for just the right point. With my right hand i was much less gentle and pushed two fingers at once into Becky's pussy. Both women gasped. "Nobody told you to stop licking my tits" I heard my wife's voice and Becky's head went down again. I could feel her hands searching for me. "Use them on my wife" I commanded and now Becky was gently massaging my wife's tits while she continued to suck her. I continued to fuck both women with my fingers and my wife started harshly playing with Becky's tits. It did not take long, and my wife exhaled loudly screaming out her second orgasm and only seconds later Becky collapsed over her, her orgasmic screams damped by my wife's breasts, as her head lay in between her.

I grabbed her by her shoulders an pulled her up. "No time to rest, now it's my turn. Get your mouth round my cock asap!" She turned around to me, unzipped my pants and pulled them down. The sudden release of outside pressure felt really good and I stepped out of my pants next my boxers were going down and I heard her gasp, when my 20 cm of thick meat jumped into her face with everything containing it now gone. She grabbed it with one hand and started licking it from below before cautiously taking my tip into her mouth. After a few seconds as she started to release it again I started to get impatient, but my wife had already recovered from her last orgasm and grabbed the back of her head. "You call that a blowjob?" She said and pushed Becky's head onto my cock until it was fully inserted. I felt her gagging but she did not protest. My wife forced her head to fuck my cock and after a few strokes we could see, that Becky now did it on her own, so she let her head free again. She went behind me, got on her knees pressed her tits into my ass, and started massaging my balls while with the other hand forcefully massaging Becky's tits again. That was to much. I gasped and unloaded into Becky's throat without warning. However she was a good girl and swallowed as much of the load as she was able to.

I stepped back from Becky and rested myself and my cock on the bed. But my wife took control again. She got up and went out of sight. After a few seconds I heard a bottle opening and she came back in my view, oiling her huge breasts and making sure I saw all of it. And she did not forget to squeeze a nipple and boy, was that a good show. She then proceeded to go behind Becky, also oiling her young tits. The show of those huge, oiled white tits pressing against Becky's back while my wife oiled her big black tits got me going again quickly. And boy, was I in for a treat. After both woman had their tits properly oiled, my wife positioned Becky to my left and herself to my right and they started to take turns titfucking me while not forgetting to play with each other's asses and pussies. I was rock hard again after just a few minutes. But that was just the beginning of this second round. My wife advised Becky to continue titfucking me, while she went and got herself a buttplug, which she made a show for me and Becky inserting it. All the while I had positioned Becky above me now, in a way I was able to fingerfuck her, while she continued with her titfuck. My wife went again, and came back with one of her vibrators. She positioned herself to our side, so I could watch her starting to fuck herself with it while she had a perfect view onto Becky an me. This continued for a couple of minutes before she stopped, crawled over to us and removed Becky's buttplug, only to replace it with the vibrator.
She fucked Becky's ass with the vibrator while her tits were dangling above my face. I did not need a second invitation. I grabbed one of her tits with my free hand and positioned her nipple onto my mouth, so I was able to lick, suck and gently bite her. Afterwards I grabbed the second one and I started to squeeze the breast with my hand and her nipple between my fingers. My wife moaned with excitement. Becky's titfuck however got more and more sloppy while her moans got louder and louder until she screamed out her orgasm and collapsing on top of me.

My wife did not really give her time to catch her breath. She rolled her down from me and placed her on her back, immediately placing her lap above Becky's face. The good girl knew what to do and started to eat her out. My wife meanwhile cleaned the vibrator with a wet wipe and threw it over to me. I took it, got up and got behind her, pushing the vibrator into her pussy for a couple of strokes. My wife meanwhile slapped Becky's pussy and said sharply: "Put these hands to use and pleasure my tits!" This was followed by a second, harder slap when Becky did not obey right away. After a few strokes with the vibrator, I removed it from my wife's pussy and also removed her buttplug. I replaced the buttplug with the vibrator and started fucking her ass with it, while inserting my cock into her pussy. The three of us quickly found a rhythm which led to Becky not only licking my wife's pussy, but also to bottom of my cock and my balls when I pushed in. My wife could not resist this very long and screamed out her orgasm, collapsing forward her head onto Becky's belly. I also couldn't last any longer, I left the vibrator sticking in my wife's butt and grabbed her hips with both hands and after two or three more strokes I also came.

We arranged us in bed when we heard scratches at the door. The dogs wanted in. Becky was absolutely tired. We let the dogs in and the five of us went to sleep. The next morning we were awoken by the dogs. We quickly dressed and let them out. We set down for breakfast and Becky thanked us for the night. She stayed our go to dogsitter for three years and while not every time, from time to time she also joined us in bed afterwards (and sometimes we invited her for this sole purpose). We also got to know some of her friends and I also got to fuck her. But those are tales for different times.

I (32F, Southeastern USA) just returned from an awesome 2 week adventure with my fiancé (who was my boyfriend before we left, teehee!) This sub was helpful when planning my packing list and selecting a bag for purchase so I wanted to offer my experience in return.
We wanted to hit 3 countries so the trip involved a total of 6 planes and 5-ish train changes. It was a lot for the time we had, but we made it work! I wanted a backpack suitcase as a carry-on item, and to wear on my back for any foot travel in between. Each of the 3 AirBnbs had a washing machine.
The weather was no hotter than 82 degrees F during the day, mid 50s at night in Barcelona and France due to being seaside. We had one rainy day while in Rome.

Right side/main compartment of Allpa, in 3 packing cubes:

-7 pairs of undies
-6 pairs of socks
-1 sports bra
-1 bralette
-1 swimsuit
-2 tank tops
-1 nice tshirt
-1 long sleeve henley shirt
-1 sundress
-1 sleep shirt
-1 pair of nice jeans
-2 pairs of shorts
-2 pair of flowy pants, one pair being for sleeping
-1 bathing suit cover up/oversized shirt

Left side/lower compartment:

-1 lightweight black zip jacket, worn on the plane
-1 packable rain jacket
-1 pair of Chaco sandals (I wore tennis shoes on travel days. Total 2 pairs for this trip)
-1 bag of face wipes
-1 canvas shopping bag, rolled up
-1 hairbrush
-1 small purse that I bought while in Italy

1 soft toiletry bag with:

-TSA liquid containers of shampoo, conditioner, lotion
-Travel size Ponds moisturizer
-Mini deodorant
-Mini face sunscreen
-Meds
-Toothbrush
-Tweezers
-Handful of hairties
-One urban decay eyeshadow single, eyeshadow brush, concealer stick, eyebrow pencil
-Fiancé carried toohtpaste and soap that we shared

Top compartment:

-1 pair of backup eyeglasses
-1 pair of sunglasses
-1 water bottle, when empty

Laptop compartment:

-2 small paperback language guides
-1 folder containing train tickets and iteneraries
I also carried a small backpack as my personal item, and a chest pouch for passport, money, and phone.
Backpack contained water bottle, kindle, small first aid kit, and small canvas pouch containing chargers and adapters. Also carried various snacks as needed.
Most of my souvenirs fit inside my personal backpack for the trip home. I brought back a bag of coffee, a box of chocolates, 3 magnets, a handful of pretty rocks from France, and some stickers. My fiancé snuck in one of his souvenir t-shirts and an airplane blanket as well. I bought 1 outfit in France and 1 small purse in Italy, both fit in my Allpa without adding much bulk.
Takeaways and observations:
-Narrowing down my clothing choices was HARD, but we did laundry 3-4 times during our trip. Having access to clean clothes was a game changer. Not once did I experience "packing regret." I also bought one outfit in France that was added to the rotation.
-I was worried at first about having only 2 pairs of shoes, but I am happy with this decision. I'm sort of a tomboy and have been pairing Chaco sandals with dresses for 10 years at least, which I understand isn't everyone's preference. We were never underdressed at any restaurant we visited. Tennis shoes are an obvious must for city exploration.
-Our first 2 destinations were coastal, so the Chaco sandals and layering tops were handy. It was cooler at night, so the bathing suit coverup was perfect as a cardigan.
-I probably could have packed fewer pairs of socks. However, for our trip home, I used several clean socks to wrap fragile ceramic magnets that we had purchased.
-The packable canvas bag was a must for trips to the supermarket or street vendors, etc. We also kept any plastic shopping bag that we accrued for transporting our sandals or dirty clothes.
-I was paranoid about pickpocketing, esp in the metro stations. My chest bag NEVER left my body except when hanging out in our AirBnbs. No one bothered my main bag. One lady grabbed my ass "by accident" on the train, (called her out, she was pissed) but my pockets stayed empty at all times. I also put a lanyard on my phone so it stayed attached to my wrist when in use.
-I did not wear the Allpa bag on my back when in packed airports or metros. While in line for coffee at the Rome airport, it was so crowded and I almost whacked several people because I was not paying attention and honestly forgot it was on my back!
-The lack of water bottle holder on the Allpa was personally not an issue for me. My water bottle fit in my personal backpack, and I always grab a free water on flights anyway.
-I bought a cheap bag of disposable shaving razors while in France, since flying with these within Europe is not an issue. I think I kept 3 of them, and left the unused ones at the AirBnb for other guests.
I am still jetlagged but wanted to get this written out while it was still fresh. Hit me with any questions- happy to expand on anything.
TL;DR: Cotopaxi Allpa 35L was great for my 2 weeks in Europe. Traveled via plane, train, and the occasional Uber. Bag was accepted as carry-on by United, Ryan Air and Wizz Air, but not by Lufthansa- I attribute this to being one of the last zones to board so they were eyeing victims at the gate. Bag was checked free of charge and made it home with me.

Links for reference:

-Cotopaxi Bag
-Packing Cubes
-Personal Bag/Day Pack
-Chest Pouch
-Charging Adaptors
-Phone Lanyard
-Face Wipes

I (22F) am stuck living with my mom and two uncles because I don't have any money and it's impossible to find a job right now. i don't have any memories of my uncle abusing me in anyway when i was younger so i don't have any actual basis for why i feel the way i do. but i feel really uncomfortable around one of my uncles. i feel like he's always staring at my boobs whenever i'm in my pajamas and not wearing a bra. a lot of the times when we interact, he's unnecessarily close to me and/or touching me. today he was helping me with something and his front side brushed up against my backside and now i feel really gross. maybe it was an accident but in my opinion, there was no need for him to be that close to me. i feel like i'm going crazy because he hasn't actually done anything and maybe i'm just projecting past sexual trauma onto him but i don't feel safe around him. I don't like being alone with him.
But the thing is, my other uncle doesn't make me feel unsafe. my other uncle goes out of his way to not touch me or to give me personal space. i never get the feeling that he's looking at my boobs. idk maybe it's because i like him more because he's the fun uncle.
I don't know what to do. i can't tell my mom because she probably won't believe me and all she cares about is optics and literally anyone else's feelings over mine.
Am i projecting?? am i making a big deal out of nothing/possibly honest mistakes??
edit: for clarity

Hello everyone! As always, thank you for all your comments and votes under my last post about Charlotte Lester- I hope that she will be found soon and save.
Today I'd like to highlight a case of a Jane Doe.
DISCOVERY
On the 27th of April, a body of a woman was discovered in Webbers Falls, Muskogee County, Oklahoma, USA. She was spotted by a passerby traveling down a county road about a half-mile west of Ross Road. The woman was found in a ditch beside the gravel road in the morning hours, and investigation has concluded that she has been placed there when she was already dead at around midnight, meaning that she has been deceased for about 12 hours. Marks either on her body or on the ground (it's not clear) indicated that she has been dragged to the spot and placed, not dumped or thrown from a car. She was in a semi-seated position, clutching a bloody towel over her lower abdomen. No ID was found on her body or near her. There were no signs of sexual assault or other type of struggle on her body.
Her cause of death was intense vaginal hemorrhage, believed to be caused by either a botched abortion or a miscarriage, which happened in the first trimester of pregnancy. Jane's exact ethnicity isn't known to this day; Earliest reports said that she was Hispanic, but nowdays it's believed that she could've been Native American (Oklahoma is home to the Muscogee Nation), White (specifically Greek), South Asian or mixed. She was believed to be 20-40, but more modern estimates say that she was most likely in her 30s. She was estimated to be 5' 3"(63 inches / 160 cm) and about 150 lbs (68 kg). Jane's hair was brown with a reddish tint, and about 4-6 inches (10-15 cm) long; Her eyes were also brown. Her ears were pierced twice, but she wasn't wearing any earrings. She had a scar below umbilicus and one scar on right shin that showed suture marks. Jane was wearing a white long-sleeve turtle neck, a sports bra, black jogging pants with double white stripes on outside of legs, yellow pedal pushers/capris, panties, a pair of socks, two leather bracelets and also bracelets made out of cloth and elastic. Her dentals, fingerprints and DNA are all available- her fingerprints were ran through a database, but they didn't lead to her identification, meaning that she had no criminal history.
CONCLUSION
Due to the fact that Doe was dragged to where she has been ultimately found, it means that another person was involved in her death, or at least in placing (since it can't really be called hiding) her body. It leads me to believe that whatever happened to Jane, it had to be at nefarious in at least some way, and it wasn't a case of a woman having a natural miscarriage and dying by accident/lack of proper medical care by herself.
A common theory is that Jane was a victim of a botched abortion- she had the procedure done illegaly and improperly, which lead to her bleeding out to death, and one or more of the people involved got rid of her body. In 2006, abortion in the first trimester was legal in Oklahoma thanks to Roe v Wade, but in 2014, the state only had three abortion clinics (I'm not sure how it was in 2006). There's a chance that Jane had to resort to a back-alley abortion due to not having access to a proper clinic.
Another theory was that Jane was in the US illegally, which is why she or people she was with didn't reach out to a proper medical facility in case of a miscarriage. It's also possible that she was exploited in some way too, so she mattered little to whoever was using her. There's also a theory that she might've been a domestic abuse victim, but there's no info on if she had any bruises or other trauma on her body.
I believe that there's a high chance that Jane will be identified soon. Her DNA is available, so doing her genetic genealogy is a matter of time and funds.
This case has moved the local community- Jane was about to be buried in a pauper's grave due to no family or friends stepping up and identifying her, but a local couple has funded a proper grave for Jane, and dozens of people showed up to her funeral. She's currently resting at the New Hope Cementary in Hulbert, Oklahoma. A part of her inscription says "FOUND IN FOREVER'S PEACEFUL SLEEP / KNOWN ONLY TO GOD, LOVED BY STRANGERS".
If you have any info about Jane Doe's identity, contact the Muskogee County Sheriff's Office at (918) 687-0202 (case number 12042706-1).
SOURCES:

1. doenetwork.org
2. NamUS.gov (includes facial reconstruction)
3. oklahoman.com
4. newson6.com
5. findagrave.com (includes a non-graphic post mortem photo)

Jane Doe's websleuths.com thread

Killer Grips: Anne Maria, Jasmine, Justin, Millie
Screaming Gaffers: Chase, Izzy, MK, Ripper
Episode 13: Ocean's Eight...or Nine
“Last time on Total Drama Action. We learned that war movies are brutal!”
“At first, our contestants were flying high. But tensions soon ran deep when the Grips couldn't capture the footlocker to win the challenge, despite the inspiring and newfound leadership of Millie. And while they eventually won that battle, you have to wonder if they lost the war because the biggest conflict is still with the Gaffers.”
“In the end, even though Scott was working with MK, he and his broken arm got eliminated because of MK double crossing him. Was it time for Scott to go? Yeah! He won't be asking for benefits anymore.”
The recap ended with a flash transition to the smiling host in the driver's seat of a sleek red convertible, the top down and the engine running softly, with his left arm hanging out the side. "You keep comin' back for the explosive drama," he told the camera as it zoomed out slightly, "I keep comin' back for the perks!" He gave the side of the car a few pats. "Car chase this week! And with only eight contestants left, the engines are on and the stereo is set to thump to the catchy opening theme song." The camera pulled back once more, showing the entire convertible. "It's time, for some more, Total! Drama! Action!"
The shot pulled back even more as he revved the engine, and with squealing tires he took off...and immediately crashed into a tall pine a few yards away.
"Aww, crap!"
(Theme Song)
A few deep drum beats opened the episode as the scene faded in at the dining hall. The teams were eating what looked like bacon and eggs on the two tables, Grips closer to the entrance and Gaffers closer to the meal counter. The camera zoomed in on them, all four on one side of the table – Izzy on the far left with Chase, then MK and Ripper on the far end.
"And that was how I spent a week on crutches. Skateboarding down a steep road may be fun, but it will cost you a few broken bones," Chase rambled to Izzy as the camera panned over them to the other end of the table.
“That's nothing compared to what I've done,” Izzy teased. “I once wrestled a kangaroo in a zoo because it took my peanuts and even though I won, I had to spend a week at the hospital.”
“Unbelievable,” Chase gaped in amazement.
“Nobody steals my peanuts, unless they're elephants,” Izzy said.
Confessional: Chase
“I can see why Ripper has a crush on Izzy,” Chase confessed. “She's almost like a female version of me, only more insane and kooky. I should invite her over to my place so she could test out a couple of my stunts.”
Confessional Ends
Ripper was shoveling his mountain of food into his mouth, stuffing his cheeks and topping it off with a swig of orange juice. "Are you gonna eat that?" he asked MK with a full mouth, pointing at her more modest plate and spraying small flecks of food on her.
"Ugh," MK said with a cringe of disgust. "Can't you swallow before you talk?"
Ripper huffed as he rolled his eyes and swallowed his food.
“And I'm still going to eat my breakfast,” MK said before quickly shoveling her eggs and bacon into her mouth and swallowing.
"Well if I'm not going to have seconds," Ripper said, standing up suddenly, "I'm going back to my trailer to crash."
“Don't let the door hit your head on the way out,” MK muttered.
Ripper stormed towards the main flap in the craft services tent. The burly boy passed the Grips on the way, who were eating their breakfast as he walked past.
"If our so-called cook wants to be appreciated," Ripper muttered as soon as he got out into the open, "then he should could more food like the one today and make it unlimited-" Having turned his head to glance back inside, he missed the intern who swiftly put a sack over his head. He was quickly knocked to the ground with a grunt of protestation, and dragged out of sight.
Inside, the Grips looked none the wiser. "I'm really proud of all of us still being here," Jasmine told her teammates, Anne Maria and Millie on one side of the table with Justin and her opposite them. "We've all got a great shot to make it even further as a team!"
"I hear you loud and clear," Anne Maria said with a nod. "We've only lost two out of five challenges that actually mattered. We're basically the better team!"
“I won't say better. Just that we're more skilled than the Gaffers,” Millie noted.
A visible scent was shown around Jasmine's nose, and she started to sniff her nose. “I reckon. Something in Chef's kitchen actually smells marvelous. I'm gonna go ask Chef what that is," the Outback girl said before getting off her seat.
The camera followed her as she ran across the room and stepped into the kitchen. Jasmine then saw a pot that was steaming and smiled before removing the lid and seeing it was just steam. "Steam? What a shrewd trick!" she grumbled angrily and looked behind her. “How could I have let myself get had like that?!”
The door behind Jasmine promptly opened and a sack was jammed down over her head. She gave a muffled yelp as she was pulled outside, the camera cutting away to show her slamming to the ground with a rope tied around her. She began to grunt as she was dragged off-screen.
The scene flashed back inside as a knife cut a hole in the canvas roof, a rope was thrown down, and Chris descended into the tent with a grin on his face.
"What an entrance!" Izzy exclaimed with a dash of excitement.
"Consider it a hint as to this week's movie genre," Chris told her.
"Let me guess," Anne Maria said with an annoyed frown, "is it 'Whoever Did The Crime Does The Time' movie day?"
"No," Chris replied. "This week, we're paying tribute to the action-packed Bank Heist Gangster Caper film!"
"Uh, Chris," Justin spoke up, "our team is missing a player."
"So is ours," MK added from the other side of the room, "but I don't really care."
"Jasmine and Ripper are gone, people," Chris told them. "Because, rescuing them is the first part of your challenge!"
A few dramatic notes played as Anne Maria gasped, then Millie, then Justin, then Chase yawned.
"Oh, sorry. I was just feeling tired," the stunt boy said.
"They've both been locked up in state-of-the-art safes," Chris explained, "along with all the tools each team will need to commit a movie-perfect bank robbery. Your job is to crack the safes, rescue your teammate, grab the equipment, and try to be the first ones to rob the First National Bank of Chris."
The camera zoomed out to include the entire room in the shot as the host grabbed hold of the rope he'd come in on. "Let's kick it, gangsters!" he declared before getting pulled back up to the roof.
The scene flashed to one of the film lot's many sets, this one constructed to look like a pair of bank vaults set in a brick wall. Zooming in on the one on the right, Jasmine could be heard nervously shouting "Hello? Is anybody out there?"
Cutting inside, the tall girl threw the sack off her head and looked around. The room she was in had what looked to be safe deposit boxes covering the wall behind her, an air vent on the wall near the vault door, and a white bench in the center that she was sitting on.
"I don't like this. Not one bit," Jasmine told the camera in a rising panic, her voice echoing slightly in the vast room. "Who ambushes someone, ties her up, and throws her in a bank vault? Especially if that specific person is CLAUSTROPHOBIC!!!"
"I don't mind being locked up in here," Ripper told the camera in his own vault, identical to the one Jasmine was in. "This means I don't have to do the challenge. It's almost like a day off." He looked around for a bit. "This bank vault could use a TV though."
The scene flashed white briefly before cutting to a close-up of Chase turning the dial on the outside of the Gaffers' vault door.
"How's it going?" MK asked as the camera pulled back to show her and Izzy waiting nearby.
"No idea," Chase said. "I've never done this before!"
"What about on school locks?" Izzy asked.
"Those are different," Chase told her, still focused on the lock. "I could actually remember the combination."
"Then why are you the one doing it?" MK asked in annoyance. "Step aside and let me have a go at the lock." She shoved Chase away and started fiddling with the dial.
Confessional: MK
"How could our resident daredevil forget that he has a genius on his team?" MK told the confessional. "Personally, I was almost offended, but feeling weak is for babies. That's a philosophy me and Scott have in common."
Confessional Ends
“By all means, go ahead MK,” Chase told her with a look of indifference as the camera moved over to the Grips a few feet away.
Millie was already working the dial while Anne Maria peered closely at the vault door and Justin stood against the wall next to it. "Of all the people to get kidnapped, it had to be Jasmine," Justin commented. "Why not any one of us?"
"I know she's almost good at everything, but I don't think she's a master at combination locks," Anne Maria told the eye candy. "If she was, we would have escaped that submarine much earlier."
“It was just an assumption," Justin shrugged. "How's it going Millie?"
“I'm still working on it,” Millie spoke up, then went back to work.
"Come on, you oversized locker," MK grunted, turning the dial and finally pounding on the door in frustration. "I've cracked safes tougher than you!"
"Aren't you supposed to be the brainy one?" Chase huffed.
"Can it!" MK said sharply. "At the very least, I don't do things that'll break my bones!"
Chase merely glared at the AV girl.
“Fortunately, I always keep a stethoscope handy,” Millie said. She had taken one out at some point as she worked on the lock.
"If she's having trouble," Anne Maria told Justin, "then we'd better come up with some other plan to bust out Jasmine."
"Can you be more patient?” Millie hissed. “Just because I'm smart, doesn't mean I know how to do everything.”
"Maybe instead of trying random numbers," Izzy suggested, "we should try to figure out what combination Chris would give it?"
"So what," Chase asked. "His birthday?"
"Yeah, or his phone number, measurements, or some other random thing about him," Izzy said with a smile.
"I dunno," MK thought. "That sounds too easy."
"But it is worth a shot," Chase inputted before he entered a code and looked at Izzy, who tried the handle.
It didn't budge. "It wasn't that, but we're on the right track," Izzy said hopefully.
As Anne Maria and Millie were figuring out the combination in the background, the view panned right to show Chris reading a book in the foreground privately until Justin moved over to him.
“You know, Chris, I was thinking. Super hot guys like you and me have to stick together,” Justin said. “So why don't you tell me what the combo is? And then we can talk about guy stuff and I'll give you a shoulder rub?” he offered and put his hands on Chris’s shoulders.
“Justin?” Chris said with a glimpse of worry.
“Uh-huh?”
“You're making me kind of uncomfortable here.”
The focus was back on the Gaffers. "If the combination wasn't any of those…" Izzy thought.
"I'll try the total amount of hair gel he goes through every month," Chase suggested, already turning the knob.
The wild child watched him for a few moments before her gaze wandered down to the air vent close to the ground. "Maybe we should try asking Ripper?” Izzy suggested. “There's likely something inside that can help us."
"If we ask Ripper, he's just gonna act all cocky about it," MK objected.
"True," Chase admitted, "but the Grips look like they're ahead of us," the team glanced over at the three Grips, "and I don't want to lose twice."
MK sighed. "Fine. We'll ask him."
The Gaffer trio knelt down in front of the air vent. "Hey, Ripper?" Chase called into it. "Can you hear me in there?"
A moment passed, before Ripper's reply came. "Yes. Why did it take you dweebs so long to think about talking to me?"
"We wanted to try opening the lock ourselves, thank you," MK answered.
"And that was a big waste of time," Ripper said. "Have the Grips dorks opened theirs yet?"
"No, not yet," Chase told the bully. "But they're still working on it, so we don't know how much time we have left."
"That's not good," Ripper told his teammates. "Alright, I'll help you open the vault door."
"Cool," MK said before sporting a serious look. "But don't think we're going to make you the boss of us just because of this. We can easily vote you out, and Izzy will be on board with it!"
Confessional: Chase
"Using Ripper's crush against him just to keep him under control?" Chase asked in the make-up trailer. "That MK girl is really cold!" He grinned afterwards. "I'm cool with Ripper, but he does need to be knocked down a few pegs."
Confessional Ends
The viewpoint cut inside the Gaffers' vault, showing Ripper growling frivolously. "Deal," he said towards the air vent. "I've checked most of the safe deposit boxes in here and found these." He took several slips of paper out of his pockets, and stuffed them through the vent.
They fell out one by one on the other side, and were picked up by an eager Izzy. "Let's see what we've got," she said as she laid the scraps on the floor and moved them around.
"It must be the combination!" MK exclaimed as the shot moved to a downward view of the paper, showing two rows of roman numerals. Izzy quickly stood back up and got to work on the dial.
“Thank you, dude!” Chase said through the vent.
“You're welcome!” Ripper said back.
A smiling Izzy finished entering the combination and turned the handle. “Ta-da!” the redheaded girl shouted in triumph as the door swung outward, revealing Ripper standing with a leather bag in his hand as he stepped out into the studio.
“Thanks or whatever," Ripper told his team apathetically. "Let's head to the next part of the challenge while we still can."
He took off first, and MK, Chase, and Izzy followed behind him.
The camera panned over to the Grips, warily watching their opponents leave. "Now we're behind," Justin griped.
"Have you made any progress yet?" Anne Maria asked Millie. “And I'm asking nicely.”
“I've only got thirty-one and eleven,” Millie informed.
"GET ME OUT!!" Jasmine's voice was heard from the vent while there was heavy pounding on the door, much to the surprise of the Grips.
"Jasmine, you can hear us?" Millie asked in shock.
The viewpoint cut inside the Grips' vault. "This door isn't exactly soundproof," Jasmine said. "And listening to you all has been helping me deal with being trapped inside."
"Are the vents in there real?" Justin asked.
Jasmine walked over to the vents in the vault. "They're not made out of plastic, I'll say."
"New plan. Climb out through the vents," Millie instructed. "You can fit through it."
"And bring the bank robbing kit with you," Anne Maria added.
"If it means not being inside here for any longer, I'm all for it," Jasmine promised.
Confessional: Millie
"I didn't want to risk Jasmine's claustrophobia, and we're already behind the Gaffers," Millie said. "This does not count as lazy at all."
Confessional Ends
The camera cut to the inside of the vault, with Jasmine crouched next to the vent using a screwdriver to loosen the screw. "I…am…done!" she cheered as she finished and took off the vent.
Jasmine crawled out of the vault with the bank robbing kit in hand and Anne Maria helped her to her feet.
“Nice to have you with us,” Justin said.
"You could have left me in there, but you all proved your loyalty," Jasmine said proudly. “Now off we go!” she ordered before she and the rest of the Grips ran off.
The camera cut to the inside of the guys’ trailer as a leather bag was thrown on one of the bunk beds, and the view zoomed out to show the four Screaming Gaffers looking down as Ripper opened it.
"So what do we have?" Chase asked.
"Four ski masks," Ripper said, holding up a quartet of black ski masks, "four squirt guns," he picked one up, then pointed it upwards and pulled the trigger so that a small spurt of water shot out, "and one note about our target," he finished, taking out a folded piece of paper and reading it.
"Bonzai!" Izzy exclaimed, swiping the note and looking at it excitedly. "Let's go rob a bank!"
A hard rock tune began to play as the footage skipped forward, focusing on the feet of the Gaffers one by one as they walked forward in slow motion – first Ripper, then MK, Izzy, and finally Chase.
With a confident smirk, Ripper took his squirt gun out of his pants. The camera panned past him, showing MK holding their bag, and both Izzy and Chase with their own guns at the ready as they walked past a brick wall.
Ripper slammed the folded-up stick-up note on the counter of a bank teller's wicket. "Hey, this is a robbery!" he shouted, the camera pulling back to show the rest of the bank set they were now in. "Gimme all your money, and do nothing stupid!"
"Welcome, Gaffers!" Chris said suddenly, popping up from behind the counter. "You've beaten the Grips to the scene, so you'll get first crack at the teller!"
"Obviously," Ripper said pridefully.
"Not that I care, but I wonder how the Grips are doing?" MK said, looking back over her shoulder.
"So what's our plan?" Millie asked as she and her teammates ran outside one of the numbered studios.
"Oh right," Jasmine told her before they skid to a halt. "We do have to check what Chris gave us." She opened the bag she was holding and peered inside it before dumping the contents out on the ground, which was the same assortment of equipment the Gaffers had gotten.
"It's the stereotypical assortment criminals use to rob people out of their money," Millie said, kneeling down and picking up one of the squirt guns.
"We're behind," Anne Maria said, "and we have to stop the Gaffers from winning too."
"So we'll have to try and go in from the side," Jasmine claimed.
Justin shook his head. "No, we don't have to do that. I've watched a lot of criminal movies, and usually, the robbers do the crime head-on. It intimidates the bank tellers into caving into their demands."
“Before we execute this, we have to get prepared,” Anne Maria said.
“Why?” Justin asked.
“Because we're gonna rob the bank in style!” Anne Maria grinned with determination.
The shot flashed over to sneakers familiar to Chris's before panning up to his tanned pants, blue tight shirt, and fedora. "Hey chump! Why don't you turn around," Ripper continued as the camera pulled back, showing him leaning on the wicket counter with a gun in one hand and the bag in the other while the teller read a stack of papers in his hands, "and give me what I deserve? The cash that is," he clarified with a grin, setting the open bag on the counter.
"Just one minute, sir," the teller said in a familiar voice before turning around and throwing off his fedora, revealing none other than Topher.
"What?!" Ripper exclaimed, recoiling in shock.
"What?!" Izzy and MK echoed in surprise as the shot pulled back to show them.
The camera pulled back once again to show Chase simply blinking.
The doors of the studio were then kicked open. "THIS IS A STICK-UP! GIVE US ALL YOUR MONEY!" Anne Maria yelled, the viewpoint shifted to show her standing at the front with Millie on her left, Justin on her right, and Jasmine behind. All four were wearing cool-looking sunglasses and pointing their guns into the room.
A side-view showed the Grips looking at their opponents and the newcomer, and their background theme scratched to a sudden halt. "Oh my gosh!" Anne Maria beamed joyfully, lowering her gun while her teammates gasped.
"How's that for a dramatic twist?" Chris said as he suddenly popped up in front of the camera with a grin on his face. "And a pleasant surprise for Anne Maria," he said with an glance at the overexcited Jersey girl. "Total Drama Action will be right back!"
(Commercial Break)
The scene faded back in to a shot of a relatively isolated studio located near some cityscape backdrops before cutting inside the bank.
"Teams," Chris announced with a smug look of his own as the camera focused on him, "I am happy to announce that Topher is back for the duration of the game," he looked at the boy as he winked suavely at Anne Maria.
"Hey, he didn't even qualify for this season!" MK said in protest.
"No I didn't, MK," Topher admitted, "but my mother is a lawyer and was able to threaten to sue the producers if I didn't compete."
“That's exactly what happened,” the camera briefly cut to Chris as he nodded in agreement. “I don't want to deal with another Scott situation.”
Confessional: Chris
"Yeah," Chris told the confessional camera, "that lawsuit threat wasn't the full reason. I brought Topher back because I figured the remaining episodes could use an extra player, and who else could I have chosen but the one who worships me?” he said cockily. “And the best part is that he was willing to do anything for a shot to come back on the show!"
Confessional Ends
"So, Topher," Chris said as the challenge footage resumed, "since you were our bank teller in the challenge, you get to decide which team deserves to win first prize: your bag of loot!" He tossed a small bag into the fanboy's hands, and it made a distinct metallic clink when he caught it.
"Well," Topher said slowly, "the Grips did have a cooler entrance, and Anne Maria is on their team." Anne Maria was shown with a flattered expression. "But… the Gaffers did technically arrive first, and I don't want to play favorites, so first prize goes to them." He gave the loot bag to Izzy.
“Awesome!" Chase cheered.
"So, this means the Killer Grips win second prize!" Chris told the team.
"What's second prize?" Justin asked.
"Topher!" Chris said ecstatically. "For the rest of the game! Or, until he's eliminated!"
“Works for me,” Topher said with a grin and moved over to his designated team. “Hey Anne Maria!”
“Baby, it is so good to see you!” Anne Maria gushed and gave him a hug that he reciprocated.
"So, Grips, Gaffers," Chris addressed the two teams, "your getaway cars are waiting! Better get a move on before the cops arrive!"
The contestants gave him unimpressed looks.
"That means GO!" Chris exclaimed with less amusement, and the two teams finally began to run out the door – first the Grips, who were closer, then the Gaffers.
The scene cut outside as the teens sprinted down the road and a more dramatic melody began to play.
“Getaway cars are always cool!” Izzy spoke first. “That's the undeniable rule of heist movies!”
“Aston Martins maybe?” Justin wondered.
“Or those Mini Coopers!” Millie guessed.
“I'm hoping for a Porsche!” Jasmine said next.
The fake hill was shown in the distance, a few faint dots visible running up along its path. The camera flashed closer, panning up past MK and Chase, Jasmine and Anne Maria, and Millie and Justin as they ran up the hill. Another flash centered the shot on a pile of what looked like spare vehicle parts, including a wide red double-seat.
"What's all this junk?" Topher asked with a frown, the camera pulling back to show the other Grips with him and the Gaffers at a pile nearby that, despite having green instead of red, was otherwise identical.
A somewhat musical horn preceded Chris driving up in his red sports car, attracting immediate attention from the cast. "These are your getaway cars," he told them. "Just waiting to be assembled."
Ripper shrugged. "I should have seen this coming."
"If the vehicles were ready to go," Chris told the others with a broad smile, "it wouldn't be much of a challenge, now would it?" Most of the cast sighed or groaned in disappointment, and Chris sped off with a cloud of exhaust.
He crashed almost immediately after going off-screen, and once the exhaust dispersed a single wheel bounced and rolled back across the screen. "Aww, crap!"
The footage flashed ahead, focusing on the Gaffers as they stood around their pile of parts. "We should start by sorting out what we have," MK told the others. "I want to see what I have to work with in order to build our car."
"I think it's a go-kart," Izzy guessed.
“Whatever it is, I'm building it,” MK said uncaringly. “Izzy, you can help me as well.”
“And what about us?” Ripper addressed himself and Chase.
“You can drive the vehicle when we're done,” MK told them.
Confessional: MK
"I know I'm the biggest target on the team and will be eliminated if we lose," MK told the camera. "I figured that applying my skills in engineering would keep us out of the loser circle."
Confessional Ends
The camera panned away from the Gaffers and focused on the Grips. Jasmine and Millie were wrenching the seats to the frame as Anne Maria and Topher held them in place.
"Are you just going to stand there, Justin?" Topher told the handsome model, who was standing a few feet away.
“Is there something I can do where I won't get grease on my epidermis?” Justin questioned in disgust.
“You're kidding, right?” Topher asked in disbelief.
“Hand modeling is one of the things that put me on the map,” Justin smiled as he posed.
“How are you two so good at this stuff?” Anne Maria conversed with Millie and Jasmine.
"I have a father who's a car mechanic," Jasmine answered. "He'd usually bring me over to his workplace so he can teach me a thing or two."
“I own a book about vehicles, and it taught me how to repair or attach parts together,” Millie responded.
“With those skills, we're obviously guaranteed to win,” Anne Maria gloated. “Just make our vehicle faster than the other team's.”
Confessional: Anne Maria
"I never knew when Topher would debut into the game," Anne Maria told the confessional camera as she sprayed her hair. "I know he told me he would plan the details out, but I didn't know that he would join this episode.” She put her spray can into her hair. “But I'm not complainin’. Now I get to spend time with my boyfriend!"
Confessional Ends
A hard rock tune played as several close-ups of the Grips' red go-kart were shown in quick succession – the left front wheel, a seat, the right front wheel, a flag on the bag bearing their team symbol, and the steering wheel as Jasmine tightened one final nut in it and Millie hopped into the driver's seat.
"Alright," she told her teammates while revving the engine, "let's see what this go-kart can do!"
“I'm calling shotgun!” Anne Maria immediately declared as she and the others smiled and piled into the kart.
Anne Maria and Topher got in the front seat next to Millie with Jasmine and Justin in the back. Millie grinned cockily, shifted the kart into gear, and looked back over her shoulder. "See you at the finish line!" she called to the Gaffers before speeding off.
The camera panned back to the green kart, which had just been completed as well. "Get in, now!" Izzy commanded.
“I'll be driving this puppy!” Chase took the driver's seat for himself as Izzy jumped into the seat next to him.
“And we'll be in the back!" MK said. Chase revved the engine and put on the gas while Ripper and MK scrambled onto the back.
The music turned hectic as the race began, the camera pulling back to show the trail down the fake hill. Though the Grips were in the lead, Chase furrowed his eyebrows and turned the steering wheel sharply, causing his kart to cut off the beaten track. The uneven terrain jostled the vehicle, but none of the four fell off.
Panning back to the Grips, Jasmine's eyes went wide when she looked back and saw the competition closing the gap. "They're gaining on us!" she cried, causing Millie to briefly look back to see for herself.
"Let me accelerate our speed!" Millie exclaimed, pressing down harder on the gas before she even put her eyes back on the road.
"Look out!" Topher shouted in panic as Millie looked forward again just in time to see a clothing rack in the middle of the road. She was unable to swerve in time and they crashed through it, the viewpoint shifting to a side shot to show the Gaffers passing them by.
A close-up of Millie groaning in frustration was shown before the camera panned out to show that the Grips were now wearing various costume pieces – Justin in a top hat and monocle; Jasmine with a feather boa around her neck; Topher with a bra on his chest, Anne Maria wearing a horned helmet; and Millie herself with a flowery sun hat.
Confessional: Millie
“That was humiliating, but I'm going to keep the hat,” Millie eagerly pointed to the flowery sun hat still on her head.
Confessional Ends
Now at the base of the fake hill, the Gaffers sped onto the pavement with the Grips hot on their tail. Three of the four screamed while Chase steeled himself, the viewpoint shifting to show them rapidly approaching a wide truck carrying a load of logs – until the camera moved back to the side, revealing it as nothing more than a backdrop set-up in the middle of the road. The Gaffers crashed through it, and the Grips used the opportunity to regain the lead.
And then it was their turn to scream as they approached what seemed to be the abrupt end of a broken dock that had been cordoned off, but it too was merely a backdrop that was soon crashed through. It was the Gaffers' turn to get ahead.
The pattern repeated itself two more times, with the Gaffers crashing through a fake police barricade, followed by the Grips destroying a backdrop painted to look like Saturn and a handful of its moons. Then the Gaffers came upon a creepy old white man standing in the middle of a curve in the road, dressed in a yellow rain coat and holding a hook in his left hand. He, however, turned out not to be a prop – the Gaffers ran into him, sending him flying up into the air.
He landed soon enough, and the camera pulled back to show that he was now on the Grips' kart next to Justin. The eye candy screamed and so did the creepy old white man with the hook, and a sharp turn courtesy of Millie caused the uninvited passenger to fall off the go-kart. As they sped away, the camera caught the old man standing back up and looking at them angrily.
The scene flashed to the finish line, where Chef stood with a flag and Chris stood watching the contestants through a pair of binoculars. "It looks like the teams are neck and neck," he said as the view through his binoculars was shown, showing the two karts continuously exchanging the lead.
"We have to do something!" Topher declared as the focus moved to the Grips still wearing their costume pieces, though he took the bra off immediately.
"I'm driving as fast as I can!" Millie told him, clenching the steering wheel and staring intensely at the road.
"I know what I have to do," Justin said, standing up and grabbing the costume pieces that they were still wearing. "Sorry, but I want to win!" he told the Gaffers before tossing the boa and helmet at the green-colored kart.
The helmet bounced off the front and the boa was quickly caught in the front right wheel, causing the go-kart to swerve and fall behind while Chase struggled to regain control. Too focused on the steering wheel, he was left unable to duck in time when Justin threw the flower hat too, and it landed on his face.
The monocle was thrown as well, and it struck Izzy on her forehead. "My forehead!" she cried in pain as the Gaffers' kart veered out of control.
Justin smiled and sat back down, greeted by the cheers of his teammates as they sped uncontested towards the finish line.
It was then that their engine spat and sputtered, and to their collective horror the kart began to slow down. "We're out of gas already?!" Anne Maria exclaimed.
"And it gets worse," Topher groaned as the Gaffers, now free of excess clothing, passed them by once again.
Jasmine pursed her lips and jumped out of the kart. "We have no other choice but to push!" she ordered, her four teammates jumping out and joining in.
The scene moved back to the Gaffers as they raced forward with mostly confident looks on their faces. "And the Gaffers are taking the lead!" Chase whooped.
“I'll give thanks to their broken kart after we win this," Ripper barked out a laugh.
Chase's enthusiasm was broken when the engine began to sputter and stall as well. "This cannot be happening," he muttered as the kart rolled to a stop about a foot away from the finish line.
"Oh, heck no!" MK gritted her teeth.
"Ooh, so close!" Chris told them as the Grips ran up from behind, pushing their kart across the finish line as fast as they could, and Chef waved his flag.
"Hey, we were robbed!!" Izzy yelled and threw the monocle to the ground.
"First off," Chris said, "I'd like to congratulate both teams for choosing to go green! But in the end, the Grips are the winners!"
The Grips started cheering. "That means, I'll be seeing the Gaffers at tonight's Gilded Chris Ceremony," Chris told the sulking and disappointed losers. "And Grips, even though you committed the anything-but-perfect crime," he addressed the winners again, the money sack shown in Anne Maria's hands, "you get to enjoy victory, and your bag of loot."
The scene flashed to the interior of one of the cast trailers as money was dumped onto a table. "Now that is a lot of cash," Topher exclaimed excitedly.
"Wait a minute," Justin said as he and Jasmine each picked up one of the notes and examined them closely, "this is fake!"
"Non-negotiable 'Chris Cash'," Millie read as Topher and Anne Maria also took a closer look at the loot. "Accepted only in the Total Drama Action craft services tent towards the purchase of water from the tap?"
“Pfft," Anne Maria sniffed. "You can never trust that smile of his."
The camera moved in for a close-up of the note in her hands, showing a smiling portrait of Chris McLean in the center. The shot lingered there for a moment, then faded into a scene of the dressed-up host standing at the amphitheater podium as the Gilded Chris theme began to play.
"The time has come," Chris announced, three statuettes already on a pedestal beside him. "Like always, Screaming Gaffers," he said as the camera panned across the seats, showing Izzy and MK together in the upper right-hand corner and Chase and Ripper in the lower-left, "one member of your team will not be receiving a coveted Gilded Chris, made of the finest Belgian Chocolate." He demonstrated the awards, but none of the contestants seemed too interested in what he'd said. "Had Topher been on your team," the host continued with an impish smile, "you guys would've not been able to vote him out today."
“And why do you say that?” Ripper asked attentively.
"It wouldn't be good television to have him get voted off the same episode he got here!" Chris explained. "Now cast your votes!"
Smiling satisfactorily, MK casted her vote. The camera panned down and to the left as Izzy, Ripper, and Chase did as well, the amphitheater was shown from a distance briefly, and the scene cut back to the stage. Chef descended from off-screen on a rope harness, handed Chris an envelope, and ascended just as quickly.
"The Gilded Chris Awards go to," Chris announced as the shot changed to the stands and the music turned tenser and more dramatic, "Chase! Ripper!" One by one the campers caught their prizes, leaving only Izzy and MK.
Chris took another look at his envelope. “And the final Gilded Chris goes to… MK."
The music took a sudden, loud twist as everyone gasped while MK caught her prize with an expected smirk.
Izzy stood up from her seat. "Uh, can you repeat that again?"
"Sorry Iz," Chris said with an unapologetic smile, "but you're out."
"But...but why?" Ripper stammered.
"Yeah, I know me, Ripper, and Izzy would vote for MK together!" Chase said.
“I'm right here you know,” MK said, annoyed.
"Sorry, guys," Chris shrugged, "but our voting machines just don't lie! Only one person voted for MK, the other for Ripper, and the other two for Izzy."
Izzy gasped and looked over at Chase. "Did you and MK vote for me?!"
"Chase, what the heck?" Ripper asked in fury. "Izzy didn't do anything to you! Are you asking for me to hate you?!"
"I swear, I didn't vote for Izzy!" Chase said defensively.
"Actually," Chris interrupted, gaining the attention of all four of the teens, "it turns out we have a little footage showing just who voted for who." He looked towards the camera, which cut to static.
The earlier clip of the Gaffers voting was replayed without the sound. The viewpoint rotated to an over-the-shoulder camera which showed the screens of Izzy, Ripper, Chase, and MK's voting devices in a four-screen split. As usual, pictures of the four were scrolling across the screen alongside checkboxes, and all but MK's fingers were shown hovering over a picture of MK while MK's finger hovered over a picture of Izzy.
However, the screens seemed to go blank for a second just as the fingers pressed down on where the designated checkboxes had just been. When the pictures came back, the footage paused to show that instead, MK voted for Izzy, Chase voted for Izzy, Ripper voted for MK, and Izzy voted for Ripper.
The camera cut to static again and back to the shocked reactions of the contestants.
“Whoa!” MK gaped.
"No no no. I am so sorry," Chase said, looking up at Izzy. "It was an accident! I didn't mean to vote for you!"
“You think you're the hurt one?!” Ripper said in disbelief and hurt. “How could you vote for me, Izzy? I've treated you like a queen!”
“Do you think I wanted to kick you off the game?!” Izzy argued back. “You're my friend!”
“The only thing that's not surprising is that Ripper voted for me,” MK said.
“Votes are votes!” Chris emphasized. “And Izzy, with you receiving the majority, I'd suggest walking down the red carpet, or I'll have you be dragged again.”
Izzy moaned. "I don't want to go through that again.” The crazy girl gave one last look at Ripper. “Ripper, I-"
“Leave me alone!” Ripper snarled, looking away from Izzy before she turned and walked down the bleachers towards the Walk of Shame, sadness apparent on her face.
Confessional: MK
“Drama, tension, and betrayal,” MK listed off. “Three key elements to today's elimination.” The techno girl made a look of regret. “I do somewhat feel sorry for Izzy and Ripper, but I have to do whatever it takes to win!”
Confessional Ends
"And that's the end of another totally dramatic episode," Chris told the camera while leaning on his podium. "We lost an exciting contestant, but gained one just as enjoyable. What surprises will Topher bring to the game? Find out next time, on Total Drama Action!" He shot a wink and finger pistol at the camera, then hopped into his red sports car which was idling just below the stage.
He sped off recklessly again, and immediately crashed into one of the large stage lights that surrounded the amphitheater. For the third time that day, he shouted "Aww, crap!" from the wreckage.
(Roll the Credits)
(Bonus Clip)
“Yeah, getting voted off feels like it happened weeks ago. I guess 'cause it did happen weeks ago,” Izzy brought up inside the limo. “I know I'm not into Ripper, but I'd never even think about voting him off. I obviously voted for MK, and Chase surprisingly voted for me. The only way these events would have conspired is if…” she thought deeply and widened her eyes, “somebody rigged the votes!!!”
Eva - 15th
Geoff - 15th
Izzy - RETURNED
Trent - 13th
Sky - 12th
Brick - 11th
Scott - 10th
Izzy - 9th
Killer Grips: Anne Maria, Jasmine, Justin, Millie, Topher
Screaming Gaffers: Chase, MK, Ripper

I'm just so tired all the time, it literally feels like I can sleep all day. I have a normal sleep schedule, but everyday I just feel so exhausted. I have dark circles under my eyes and I have no energy to do anything anymore. I just lay in bed all day and want to rot. I feel suicidal, I just want to die all the time and it's getting worse. I get nightmares of him, not of what exactly happened but just of different sa from him. I feel like there's no point in going on anymore, I don't think it's going to get better. I don't exactly know what it's like to have a flashback, but I think I've experienced them. I have really bad maladaptive daydreaming, but I don't think it's that. It's like I'm there again, I can't control it or stop it or rewind it. It's like it's happening all over again and that I'm there and I can feel it. When it's happening I just sit there and cry and I feel like screaming but I obviously can't do that so I have to hold it in. My head feels like it's burning constantly too, like the back of my head feels so fucking warm and hot. Like my brain is melting. And I just want to die and I'm so tired I just want to sleep and never wake up again.
•The one big thing that makes me feel valid is that, when I was 11, my stepdad fingered me in my bedroom. I won't go in to too much detail or anything, it's unimportant. But the entire time he just stared at me and everything was silent, like he was waiting for my reaction. Our relationship has always been odd, so I wanted it. But eventually I got scared and told him something, I don't remember what it was but it got him to stop immediately and he apologised too. I don't remember much after, as in I don't know if he left my room or I left first, but I immediately went to the bathroom. Which was when I discovered I was bleeding.
•Around this time, for some strange reason I would repeatedly say to him "fuck me daddy." This would either be in person, or over messages. I remember once, when I was in school, I messaged him that. He told me to stop in case one of my friends saw. I don't know why he didn't tell me to stop for other reasons.
•One day, after telling him that in person, we were in my parents bedroom. I was sat on his bed and he was in front of me in his weird chair. He then started going in to detail about how I wanted him to fuck me, I can't remember exactly what he said, it was like I zoned out. Everytime I try to recall it now it literally feels like bugs start to crawl up me, I don't understand why. I remember the last part, and his really disgusting hushed and gentle voice. He asked if I wanted him to "cum inside of me", or he was just explaining how that would finish. I'm not really sure.
•Still around this same time period of me being 11-12, I would ask him to 'squish me.' The reason why we would call it that is because I would be on my back, my legs would be up all the way to where my head is and he would be on top of me in a way that would 'squish me'. Basically like that one sex position. I would usually be wearing my school uniform when that would happen, so a skirt. During the 'squishing', he would push down on me, so our crotches would basically be against eachother. I don't know why, but I would continuously ask him to 'squish me' and during it I would even say the whole "fuck me daddy" thing. Only recently have I realised that he was probably just pretending to fuck me.
•Other things had happened around that age too, like how we would talk about how many times we masturbated a day and compare it to eachother. Sometimes if I was abruptly going to my room, he would ask if I was going to go masturbate, since we were 'close like that' I would tell him. He would often recommend me NSFW Instagram model accounts. I was once tricked in to sending feet pics to this guy, which really isn't that serious and whenever I brought it up with friends they find it fucking hilarious. But the detail I always leave out is that, I did bring that up with my stepdad and he proceeded to tell me that he already knew. Which means he was spying on me through the crack of the door. If that already didn't bother me, I don't understand why he just allowed me to send those pictures, if he was watching why the hell didn't he stop me?
•I'm pretty sure this also happened around the age of 11 as well, recently, a memory resurfaced but I barely remember it. Basically, I was sucking on his neck. I don't remember who said it, but either him or my mum spoke up and laughed, saying that I needed to stop otherwise I would "give him a hickey." The reason why I wouldn't be surprised if my mum was in the room at the time is because she doesn't care about what he does. She knows everything and just doesn't fucking care.
•I'm very sure that, around that age, my parents begun to expose me to their loud sex. I wouldn't be surprised if it started even younger, however. Obviously, I tried to bring it up with them at the ripe old age of 11 and my mum immediately shot me down with a "it's natural." This only stopped recently, around this year, because I had a big panic attack over hearing them and my mum finally felt guilty. I started getting panic attacks over it the minute it started, maybe the panic attacks were a sign of the trauma when I was younger, but I'm convinced it is now. I heard it so many times that I began to get paranoid every night, I would start to hear it even if they weren't upstairs (I sound crazy, I know.) I would get so anxious every night in case I would hear it, to the point I started to really resent them from it. I know fine well I could just go to sleep before them, but sometimes they even woke me up with it, on numerous occasions.
•I'm convinced my stepdad wanted me to hear it. Around the time of it finally stopping, I got mad because i was hearing it again (I'm unsure if it was due to me hearing shit or they actually were) but it caused me to take my bedding and go downstairs to sleep. In the morning, I was rudely awoken to my stepdad slamming the door open and storming past. He's not usually like that when people are sleeping, so it instantly gave me the impression that he was pissed off and the only reason I can think of is that he was angry I wasn't there to listen.
•He used to tease me for my paranoia to. As a way to discourage them from getting intimate, I would leave my door open at night. This happened around this year, but I was doing that again and I messaged my stepdad if they were actually going to sleep. It then somehow turned to him making a dig about how he knew I gets anxious at night and when I asked why he sent me "In case me and your mam have sex. 😜" Before, I tried to resolve this issue by begging them to just tell me if they were gonna have sex or not so I could sleep downstairs (because I was gonna find out the hard way anyways.) And they kept on refusing? Which just gave me the impression that they wanted me to listen more.
•Around 11 again, he would often tell me details about his and my mums sex life. Like how he was always good at pulling out and the only time he would wear a condom is right when he was about to finish. But the reason why my sister came to be was because he just failed to pull out that one time and my mum refused to get an abortion. Another time, he went on about how him and my mother had sex during her period and how they had to use towels and they didn't enjoy it because it was too messy.
•I don't know if he did things before the age of 11, my memories are very faded and it's like there are major gaps throughout everything. I'm worried that he did, however. When I was very young, I remember having no accidents at all during the night. But then, around the ages of 9, I would have an accident basically every night and would get a lot of water infections. I know that's a classic sign of child sexual abuse, but I don't want to jump to conclusions or anything.
•Another reason as to why I believe more things had happened to me than what I know of is because I always seemed to know what sex was when I was young, but I wouldn't know the name or anything specific about it like how to get pregnant or what cum was. Though, even though I didn't know what it was, it was like I always thought about it, I could never not think about sex, it was disgusting. This stayed until I was around 13. I remember where I even asked my 'boyfriend' at the time, we were both around 8, if he wanted to have sex, and I have no idea why.
•Over the years, he would flash me frequently. Everytime, I would always believe it was an accident because he'd never acknowledge it, besides from that one time which he always jokes about it and blames me. Everytime he would flash me, it would either be because of a convenient hole in the crotch of his pants or because he was wearing very lose fit shorts and it would just be hanging out. The more I think about it, I'm very sure he would have been able to feel such a thing, especially when it was poking out of the hole, but it was like he was just oblivious.
•For some strange reason, when I was younger, I would make comments about small dicks. I don't know if I was commenting on his dick specifically, but he would always say the same thing. "Width matters more than length."
•Recently, around 16-17, he made a joke about how he listens to me masturbating. Once he noticed how shocked I looked, he then went on saying about how my vibrator is too quiet to hear.
•Around 17 again, I went to use the shower. The shower I use is the one that's connected to my parents room. When I locked the door, he got madish and started making comments about it. I had to defend myself, saying how 'the door would open on it's own if I didn't lock it'. Eventually, he backed off.
•I don't understand the point in the fucking door and lock to my bedroom anymore. Whenever I decided to lock my door, my parents start shouting at me through the walls, asking why I locked my door. My stepdad barely knocks, it's like a tap and he doesn't even wait sometimes. I remember seeing a past message from an old friend saying how he tried to walk in when I was changing and that he knew I was changing. I didn't explain myself, I really wish I did because I don't remember this.
•(Around 17.) We were messaging eachother and it somehow turned in to him hinting if I saw this one animated video, it was a porn one. I said no, and to that he sent me a screenshot of it. It wasn't anything bad or anything, just the start of it and nothing was revealing, he then asked if I was sure. And how he was surprised that I hadn't.
•(Around 17.) I don't really get my period, we still don't know why. But as I was getting a lot of blood tests, my stepdad was trying to check things off the list of what it could be. One of those being that my opening is just extremely tight I guess, because he asked if I ever tried penetrating myself. I admitted that I did, but I couldn't get it to exactly go in. Which he then decided to make a comment saying how It's just my 'technique'. I wonder if the only reason he asked that was to see if I ever tried anything out of morbid curiosity.
•(Around 17 again.) He randomly bought me dildo's once, I didn't ask him for them, he just bought them for me and it was wildly uncomfortable. Once he gave me them, he asked if I wanted him to show me how to use them. I said no, which he then said something about how if I ever did then I could ask him. I worry what would have happened if I did say yes.
•When I was around 14, I went glamping. I ended up having to share a bed with him. One of the nights, I woke up to his hand just on top my crotch. I tried grabbing it and moving it away but it just fell back down on to it. I don't know if he put it back there on purpose. I still question if it was a dream, I'm very sure it wasn't because I remember going back to sleep, but it still just bugs me.
•Around 17, I was upset for some reason and he was comforting me. During this, he randomly grabbed the inside of my thigh. I usually just wear a shirt and boxers, so he basically just grabbed my naked thigh but I don't know if he was doing it in a comforting way.
•Usually when I draw, I have my knees up to my chest so it's easier to use my tablet. Considering what I wear for pyjamas, I can always see him looking at my crotch when he comes in to my room. If he really can see everything I don't understand why he doesn't just tell me to put my legs down.
•He's made a lot of uncomfortable jokes over the years too. One of the ones that upsets me sometimes is that, when he was measuring me for a binder, I was constantly moving around because it was uncomfortable since I was just in a sports bra. As he was leaving, I think I told him about how it was uncomfortable for me or something along those lines. He then turned around and shouted "oh come on, it's not like i was fingerings your pussy or anything."
•Very recently, I asked him if I looked okay before going to college. After a bit of back and fourth he said "I wouldn't kick you out of bed, maybe you could find someone in college who would do the same."
•Other times when I asked him if I looked okay, he'd go on tangents about how my ass is great or how he would date me or be too nervous to talk to me if he was my age.
•One of the more recent jokes was when I dropped a mayonnaise lid on my lap. Nothing got on me, but my stepdad turned to me then turned to my mum and shouted "if anyone starts accusing us, just tell them it was mayonnaise!" Or something like that.
•I remember after we watched the new mean girls film, he started going on saying about how he wanted to rewatch it for the Halloween seen (if you know you know) for the 'panty action'. Which rubs me the wrong way because I'm very sure the girls are supposed to be around my age.
•I'm very sure he also made this fake account, pretending to be one of my old groomers that I tried to cut off, just to message me about nsfw topics and ask for pics. It's a whole long yap about paranoia and just suspicions so I won't get into it though. If I tried to provide all the evidence I have, it'll take forever and there's no point.
There's definitely way more things that he's said, joked and done. But I'm only now beginning to realise that they're not okay. Even when I was younger, I was sort of uncomfortable around the jokes so I would just zone out, leading me to not remembering them now.
I probably will never accept that what happened to me was bad, or a big issue. Especially due to the 'lovely' people on here. Thank you for telling me immediately that I was a liar before you even knew what happened, that I shouldn't blame an 'innocent man', that you hope he comes in and rapes me to the point I split open and bleed. Thank you for telling me that my parents were just trying to promote a sex positive household, that some of the things were questionable at most. Thank you so much for saying I deserved it because I didn't send you pictures. You all made me feel like shit and I'm probably never going to tell people in person what happened to me, out of fear I would be ridiculed due to how much of a baby I'm being. I wasn't raped, so I have no place to cry or even think about it. I'm being overdramatic.
If you even read to this point, you're an angel.

Trigger warning. Also I'm sorry, this is a really long post but I'll bullet point most stuff down.
I'm just so tired all the time, it literally feels like I can sleep all day. I have a normal sleep schedule, but everyday I just feel so exhausted. I have dark circles under my eyes and I have no energy to do anything anymore. I just lay in bed all day and want to rot. I feel suicidal, I just want to die all the time and it's getting worse. I get nightmares of him, not of what exactly happened but just of different sa from him. I feel like there's no point in going on anymore, I don't think it's going to get better. I don't exactly know what it's like to have a flashback, but I think I've experienced them. I have really bad maladaptive daydreaming, but I don't think it's that. It's like I'm there again, I can't control it or stop it or rewind it. It's like it's happening all over again and that I'm there and I can feel it. When it's happening I just sit there and cry and I feel like screaming but I obviously can't do that so I have to hold it in. My head feels like it's burning constantly too, like the back of my head feels so fucking warm and hot. Like my brain is melting. And I just want to die and I'm so tired I just want to sleep and never wake up again.
•The one big thing that makes me feel valid is that, when I was 11, my stepdad fingered me in my bedroom. I won't go in to too much detail or anything, it's unimportant. But the entire time he just stared at me and everything was silent, like he was waiting for my reaction. Our relationship has always been odd, so I wanted it. But eventually I got scared and told him something, I don't remember what it was but it got him to stop immediately and he apologised too. I don't remember much after, as in I don't know if he left my room or I left first, but I immediately went to the bathroom. Which was when I discovered I was bleeding.
•Around this time, for some strange reason I would repeatedly say to him "fuck me daddy." This would either be in person, or over messages. I remember once, when I was in school, I messaged him that. He told me to stop in case one of my friends saw. I don't know why he didn't tell me to stop for other reasons.
•One day, after telling him that in person, we were in my parents bedroom. I was sat on his bed and he was in front of me in his weird chair. He then started going in to detail about how I wanted him to fuck me, I can't remember exactly what he said, it was like I zoned out. Everytime I try to recall it now it literally feels like bugs start to crawl up me, I don't understand why. I remember the last part, and his really disgusting hushed and gentle voice. He asked if I wanted him to "cum inside of me", or he was just explaining how that would finish. I'm not really sure.
•Still around this same time period of me being 11-12, I would ask him to 'squish me.' The reason why we would call it that is because I would be on my back, my legs would be up all the way to where my head is and he would be on top of me in a way that would 'squish me'. Basically like that one sex position. I would usually be wearing my school uniform when that would happen, so a skirt. During the 'squishing', he would push down on me, so our crotches would basically be against eachother. I don't know why, but I would continuously ask him to 'squish me' and during it I would even say the whole "fuck me daddy" thing. Only recently have I realised that he was probably just pretending to fuck me.
•Other things had happened around that age too, like how we would talk about how many times we masturbated a day and compare it to eachother. Sometimes if I was abruptly going to my room, he would ask if I was going to go masturbate, since we were 'close like that' I would tell him. He would often recommend me NSFW Instagram model accounts. I was once tricked in to sending feet pics to this guy, which really isn't that serious and whenever I brought it up with friends they find it fucking hilarious. But the detail I always leave out is that, I did bring that up with my stepdad and he proceeded to tell me that he already knew. Which means he was spying on me through the crack of the door. If that already didn't bother me, I don't understand why he just allowed me to send those pictures, if he was watching why the hell didn't he stop me?
•I'm pretty sure this also happened around the age of 11 as well, recently, a memory resurfaced but I barely remember it. Basically, I was sucking on his neck. I don't remember who said it, but either him or my mum spoke up and laughed, saying that I needed to stop otherwise I would "give him a hickey." The reason why I wouldn't be surprised if my mum was in the room at the time is because she doesn't care about what he does. She knows everything and just doesn't fucking care.
•I'm very sure that, around that age, my parents begun to expose me to their loud sex. I wouldn't be surprised if it started even younger, however. Obviously, I tried to bring it up with them at the ripe old age of 11 and my mum immediately shot me down with a "it's natural." This only stopped recently, around this year, because I had a big panic attack over hearing them and my mum finally felt guilty. I started getting panic attacks over it the minute it started, maybe the panic attacks were a sign of the trauma when I was younger, but I'm convinced it is now. I heard it so many times that I began to get paranoid every night, I would start to hear it even if they weren't upstairs (I sound crazy, I know.) I would get so anxious every night in case I would hear it, to the point I started to really resent them from it. I know fine well I could just go to sleep before them, but sometimes they even woke me up with it, on numerous occasions.
•I'm convinced my stepdad wanted me to hear it. Around the time of it finally stopping, I got mad because i was hearing it again (I'm unsure if it was due to me hearing shit or they actually were) but it caused me to take my bedding and go downstairs to sleep. In the morning, I was rudely awoken to my stepdad slamming the door open and storming past. He's not usually like that when people are sleeping, so it instantly gave me the impression that he was pissed off and the only reason I can think of is that he was angry I wasn't there to listen.
•He used to tease me for my paranoia to. As a way to discourage them from getting intimate, I would leave my door open at night. This happened around this year, but I was doing that again and I messaged my stepdad if they were actually going to sleep. It then somehow turned to him making a dig about how he knew I gets anxious at night and when I asked why he sent me "In case me and your mam have sex. 😜" Before, I tried to resolve this issue by begging them to just tell me if they were gonna have sex or not so I could sleep downstairs (because I was gonna find out the hard way anyways.) And they kept on refusing? Which just gave me the impression that they wanted me to listen more.
•Around 11 again, he would often tell me details about his and my mums sex life. Like how he was always good at pulling out and the only time he would wear a condom is right when he was about to finish. But the reason why my sister came to be was because he just failed to pull out that one time and my mum refused to get an abortion. Another time, he went on about how him and my mother had sex during her period and how they had to use towels and they didn't enjoy it because it was too messy.
•I don't know if he did things before the age of 11, my memories are very faded and it's like there are major gaps throughout everything. I'm worried that he did, however. When I was very young, I remember having no accidents at all during the night. But then, around the ages of 9, I would have an accident basically every night and would get a lot of water infections. I know that's a classic sign of child sexual abuse, but I don't want to jump to conclusions or anything.
•Another reason as to why I believe more things had happened to me than what I know of is because I always seemed to know what sex was when I was young, but I wouldn't know the name or anything specific about it like how to get pregnant or what cum was. Though, even though I didn't know what it was, it was like I always thought about it, I could never not think about sex, it was disgusting. This stayed until I was around 13. I remember where I even asked my 'boyfriend' at the time, we were both around 8, if he wanted to have sex, and I have no idea why.
•Over the years, he would flash me frequently. Everytime, I would always believe it was an accident because he'd never acknowledge it, besides from that one time which he always jokes about it and blames me. Everytime he would flash me, it would either be because of a convenient hole in the crotch of his pants or because he was wearing very lose fit shorts and it would just be hanging out. The more I think about it, I'm very sure he would have been able to feel such a thing, especially when it was poking out of the hole, but it was like he was just oblivious.
•For some strange reason, when I was younger, I would make comments about small dicks. I don't know if I was commenting on his dick specifically, but he would always say the same thing. "Width matters more than length."
•Recently, around 16-17, he made a joke about how he listens to me masturbating. Once he noticed how shocked I looked, he then went on saying about how my vibrator is too quiet to hear.
•Around 17 again, I went to use the shower. The shower I use is the one that's connected to my parents room. When I locked the door, he got madish and started making comments about it. I had to defend myself, saying how 'the door would open on it's own if I didn't lock it'. Eventually, he backed off.
•I don't understand the point in the fucking door and lock to my bedroom anymore. Whenever I decided to lock my door, my parents start shouting at me through the walls, asking why I locked my door. My stepdad barely knocks, it's like a tap and he doesn't even wait sometimes. I remember seeing a past message from an old friend saying how he tried to walk in when I was changing and that he knew I was changing. I didn't explain myself, I really wish I did because I don't remember this.
•(Around 17.) We were messaging eachother and it somehow turned in to him hinting if I saw this one animated video, it was a porn one. I said no, and to that he sent me a screenshot of it. It wasn't anything bad or anything, just the start of it and nothing was revealing, he then asked if I was sure. And how he was surprised that I hadn't.
•(Around 17.) I don't really get my period, we still don't know why. But as I was getting a lot of blood tests, my stepdad was trying to check things off the list of what it could be. One of those being that my opening is just extremely tight I guess, because he asked if I ever tried penetrating myself. I admitted that I did, but I couldn't get it to exactly go in. Which he then decided to make a comment saying how It's just my 'technique'. I wonder if the only reason he asked that was to see if I ever tried anything out of morbid curiosity.
•(Around 17 again.) He randomly bought me dildo's once, I didn't ask him for them, he just bought them for me and it was wildly uncomfortable. Once he gave me them, he asked if I wanted him to show me how to use them. I said no, which he then said something about how if I ever did then I could ask him. I worry what would have happened if I did say yes.
•When I was around 14, I went glamping. I ended up having to share a bed with him. One of the nights, I woke up to his hand just on top my crotch. I tried grabbing it and moving it away but it just fell back down on to it. I don't know if he put it back there on purpose. I still question if it was a dream, I'm very sure it wasn't because I remember going back to sleep, but it still just bugs me.
•Around 17, I was upset for some reason and he was comforting me. During this, he randomly grabbed the inside of my thigh. I usually just wear a shirt and boxers, so he basically just grabbed my naked thigh but I don't know if he was doing it in a comforting way.
•Usually when I draw, I have my knees up to my chest so it's easier to use my tablet. Considering what I wear for pyjamas, I can always see him looking at my crotch when he comes in to my room. If he really can see everything I don't understand why he doesn't just tell me to put my legs down.
•He's made a lot of uncomfortable jokes over the years too. One of the ones that upsets me sometimes is that, when he was measuring me for a binder, I was constantly moving around because it was uncomfortable since I was just in a sports bra. As he was leaving, I think I told him about how it was uncomfortable for me or something along those lines. He then turned around and shouted "oh come on, it's not like i was fingerings your pussy or anything."
•Very recently, I asked him if I looked okay before going to college. After a bit of back and fourth he said "I wouldn't kick you out of bed, maybe you could find someone in college who would do the same."
•Other times when I asked him if I looked okay, he'd go on tangents about how my ass is great or how he would date me or be too nervous to talk to me if he was my age.
•One of the more recent jokes was when I dropped a mayonnaise lid on my lap. Nothing got on me, but my stepdad turned to me then turned to my mum and shouted "if anyone starts accusing us, just tell them it was mayonnaise!" Or something like that.
•I remember after we watched the new mean girls film, he started going on saying about how he wanted to rewatch it for the Halloween seen (if you know you know) for the 'panty action'. Which rubs me the wrong way because I'm very sure the girls are supposed to be around my age.
•I'm very sure he also made this fake account, pretending to be one of my old groomers that I tried to cut off, just to message me about nsfw topics and ask for pics. It's a whole long yap about paranoia and just suspicions so I won't get into it though. If I tried to provide all the evidence I have, it'll take forever and there's no point.
There's definitely way more things that he's said, joked and done. But I'm only now beginning to realise that they're not okay. Even when I was younger, I was sort of uncomfortable around the jokes so I would just zone out, leading me to not remembering them now.
I probably will never accept that what happened to me was bad, or a big issue. Especially due to the 'lovely' people on here. Thank you for telling me immediately that I was a liar before you even knew what happened, that I shouldn't blame an 'innocent man', that you hope he comes in and rapes me to the point I split open and bleed. Thank you for telling me that my parents were just trying to promote a sex positive household, that some of the things were questionable at most. Thank you so much for saying I deserved it because I didn't send you pictures. You all made me feel like shit and I'm probably never going to tell people in person what happened to me, out of fear I would be ridiculed due to how much of a baby I'm being. I wasn't raped, so I have no place to cry or even think about it. I'm being overdramatic.
If you even read to this point, you're an angel.

It was entirely by accident - she answered the door and forgot she wasn't wearing a bra or a shirt. It wasn't pretty - she was overweight and they were saggy - but hey, it was still a show.

I found this subreddit by accident and was very intrigued. Tried the size calculator out of boredom, it had me at a wild size which I didn’t believe (band 3 sizes smaller than what I normally wear, immediately suspicious) but I decided to trust the process and order a new bra to test it. It fits. It fits beautifully. My boobs are happy. I would have never in a thousand years guessed I was SO off.
Thank you to everyone who ever shared and posted because thanks to you I was able to search this subreddit’s history for similar sizes and found a lovely bra that fits on the first try.

cross-posting on other relevant subs (pregnant, newparents, etc)
Hi all,
I'm a long-time lurker but rarely have time to come on anymore and read, much less comment or post. However since having my first child over 3 years ago and also my second a year and a half ago, I've been keeping notes on advice and product recommendations. I've taken to giving this out to friends and co-workers when I hear the happy news that they are expecting, so I thought I'd share it here as well in hopes it helps someone. Please take this with a grain of salt- I know everyone has different experiences! Please feel free to post your favorite advice or product recommendations as well if you want.
Take care, and enjoy your parenting journey!

General advice:

I'm really going to try to keep cliché's out of here as much as possible and keep this to only practical advice that I wish someone had laid out for me. But cliché's exist for a reason- they are generally true!

• The first couple months after birth/with a newborn are the hardest, with the first couple of weeks being the toughest yet. It really gets easier! That being said, those first several weeks the only goal should be survival. Don't plan to do any house projects, if you know something will need to be done (like a car oil change,taxes, etc) do it before baby arrives if possible. Do everything you can to try to make those first few weeks as easy as possible. Set up the crib/bassinet (I was convinced we were going to have more time and had neither set up. I literally put the bassinet together myself while I was in labor). Those last few months of pregnancy when you cook, make extra and freeze it. I have several good freezer prep recipes if you're looking for some. Once baby is here don't worry about cleaning the house, etc. Just survive.
• Accept help, but on your own terms. Lots of times people come offering to watch the baby but sometimes as a new mom you just feel more comfortable having baby with you. People can still help by doing the cooking and/or cleaning so you don't have to. And if you want/get time away from baby don't feel like you need to do those chores- take that time for you to sleep/showewhatever you need. Do not feel like you need to cateentertain guests. Or if you know you will, don't invite or let them over. This is YOUR time to bond with baby and recover- guard your time.
• Everything is a phase. Soak up the good stuff while you can, and know that the not so good stuff won't last forever.
• You can never give your baby too much love. You can't "spoil" a baby by holding them too much. Especially the first 3 months (known as the "4th trimester")- remember that baby was used to being "held"/cuddled and fed 24/7 in your womb. So even if you're holding them for 16 hrs/day- that's still a significant decrease than what they are used to. I know it's exhausting, but try to soak up those cuddles.
• Remember to take videos as well as pictures- those little newborn noises are precious!
• If everyone is crabby and it seems like nothing is fixing it- try to change the environment. Get everyone outside- fresh air is good for everyone. I've tried to get baby outside for at least a little bit every day of his life since getting home from the hospital (yes, even during winter in WI). If outside isn't an option try a bath.
• Take all advice with a grain of salt (even this). You know your baby/family best!

Pregnancy/Postpartum mama care:

• The "Expecting & Empowered" workouts were great. They have 3 guided workouts for each week of pregnancy to prepare you for labor and motherhood. Also follow them on IG. I give a lot of credit to them for my pretty easy pregnancy and deliveries!
• Once I started feeling sore later in pregnancy, prenatal yoga really helped me. I used an app called Prenatal Yoga by Down Dog that I really like. You have to pay for a subscription but I think you can try it for 30 days free, but I ended up paying for the subscription and actually re subscribed. They have a whole suite of apps that all fall under the same subscription - normal yoga, meditation, HIIT, and others. I think it's worth it, and I got the subscription on a black Friday deal for $24/year
• As far as labor goes- there’s so many resources and advice out there that could be a novel by itself. The only thing I’ll say is whatever your birth “plan” (if you have one)- just make sure it’s flexible and that your partner knows what it is and why so they can advocate for you. Once you’re in that pain it’s very hard to advocate for yourself.
• What I’ve learned is there is typically a sliding scale of interventions. Meaning- if you end up getting induced you’re more likely to end up getting a c-section. Ideally, you want to go into labor on your own. (when you’re ready to get that baby out, there are lots of myths out there and strategies to try. My advice- walking and sex).
• I’ve attempted 2 medication-free births but eventually gotten the epidural each time. If I have another baby I’m getting the dang epidural asap.
• So many postpartum care things to have on hand since you really won't know how your delivery will go. All the normal things like pads, and cooling pads, and peri bottle. I had a really easy birth experience so I didn't use a lot of the products I had so not much experience. But I did like the Honey Pot pads because they had a cooling effect that was pleasant but not overwhelming. I also liked having a sitz bath and bath salts to put in it.
• Fun postpartum symptoms to look forward to that no one warned me about (in addition to bleeding for 4-6ish weeks)- horrible cramping/contractions while the uterus shrinks the first week (especially happens when nursing) - hot pads and ibuprofen help, night sweats (waking up in the middle of the night to a crying baby drenched with sweat and freezing because you’re so wet), strong body odor (just, why?!), hair loss (this is why I cut all of my hair off after having baby). I’m sure there are others I’ve forgotten about. So many fun things!

Breastfeeding

I highly recommend trying to breastfeed if you're able. It does make the first few weeks (which are already hard) more challenging, but after that it's so much easier! You can go places without needing bottles/wateformula (all you need is you!). Plus, sterilizing and washing bottles all the time is a drag. Plus the bonding is really special (not that you can't get this without breastfeeding). But breastfeeding is always the #1 comfort technique if baby is cranky or sick, even if he's not hungry. A few tips/info:

• Stay hydrated!!! You can designate your partner that their job is to make sure you always have accessible water. And try to make sure you have water when sitting down to nurse, cause sometimes as soon as they start nursing you feel parched.
• The first few hours/days are critical to establishing your supply. Put baby to breast at a minimum every 3 hours (day and night, set an alarm) and more often if she's awake/fussy. After your milk comes in, assuming baby starts gaining weight again, your pediatrician should give you the okay to stop the alarm during the night and feeding on demand (which will likely still be pretty frequent).during the day you basically always want to be feeding them every 3-4 hours
• Invest in some nursing bras/tanks. I didn't- thinking I would later if breastfeeding worked out. But honestly you need to give it at least 1-2 months to give it a fair shot, and you can't go that long without having clothes that make it easy. We went and got some when baby was 3 days old. Would've been better to have in advance. Target has great stuff. I lived in the same 3 nursing tanks with 5 different flannel shirts over it for the first few months.
• Set up a breastfeeding station where you can be comfy and have things you might need. I love my glider chair, and put a cart with snacks, water (drink LOTS of water), phone charger, lotion, baby nail clippers (this was the easiest time for me to trim baby's nails), etc.
• Don’t pump the first 4ish weeks as this is when your supply is established, and the pump will make your body think it needs to produce more. An oversupply can be just a big of problem as an under supply.
• The tough thing with nursing is you really don't ever get a break. Even if someone else were to give baby a bottle (which I don't recommend for the first 4ish weeks for reason above)- you need to pump to keep your supply up. At that point, it's easier to just feed the baby yourself (in my opinion). To help with this during nighttime feedings, when Matt wasn't working he would basically do everything else minus the feeding (unswaddling, changing diaper, reswaddling, etc) and just hand baby to me to nurse to make it as easy as possible on me.
• I highly recommend getting a haakaa (amazon link). When you are feeding baby on one side it triggers a let down, which can lose a lot of milk on the side baby isn't on. You can use this to capture that (plus a little more since it does suction, so you do want to be careful with this and not use it too frequently and create oversupply). I use it now after baby's long night stretch and both boobs are really full. I slowly built up a decent freezer stash using this without ever actually pumping. They also have milk collectors (amazon link) that has less suction, and you can wear these under your bra if you find you're leaking often. I got these as well but didn't really like them as much as I thought.
• You'll probably also want breast pads to catch leaking. For awhile I used the disposable ones, but eventually got these (amazon link) and like them.
• Read up on milk handling/storage. La Leche league (website) is a great resource. If you're looking for even more info- read "The womanly art of breastfeeding" written by La Leche league.
• Breastfeeding should NOT hurt! If it hurts- ask for help. Could be an issue with the baby's latch or something else, like a tongue/lip tie. Make sure before you leave the hospital you have someone look at your latch and tell you what to look for to make sure you get a good latch every time. Easier to correct earlier than later.
• That being said- for the first month-ish I had pain for about 4 seconds every time baby latched. Sounds like this is unusual as no other mom I talked to experienced this so hopefully doesn't happen to you. It eventually stopped- I think it was just my nipples getting used to the expanding. But I never had my nipples crack/bleed or anything. This is not expected/normal. Talk to someone if this is happening.
• Since you'll probably want baby to take a bottle eventually- you'll need to start this at some point. The recommendation that I've read multiple times is to wait until 4-6 weeks (after breastfeeding is fully established) before trying. Then you need to do it frequently- maybe a bottle a day. We started early and he did fine so eventually we got lazy and stopped for awhile because I didn't like pumping when he bottle-fed. Then when we started trying again in preparation for me returning to work he flat out refused and then it was much harder to persuade him back to the bottle. If this happens- the method that worked best for us was called "intermittent bottle by mom". Google it if you get in this position (or ask me questions at that point).
• Positions- at the hospital they only taught me the cradle and football hold for some reason. I later learned about the laid back position and at the time it was a game changer for me- I was so tired/sore of sitting up and hunching over for the middle of the night feeds. Laid back allowed me to be much more comfortable. Also side-lying- one of my favorite positions now.
• Breastfeeding doesn't have to be all or nothing. You can combo feed with formula if you want/need to. A fed baby and happy mama is the most important!

Sleeping

Good luck! Just kidding. So much conflicting info out there on this. I guess my number 1 tip here would be to read up on different strategies and have a plan. Being knowledgeable about different options is helpful if you need to pivot strategies in the middle of the night and you're running on very little sleep. Some questions for you to consider - will you bedshare (most families end up co-sleeping at some point. Good to know the Safe Sleep 7 in case you decide to)? Or room-share? Will you "sleep train" (which means different things to different people)? When they start getting decent stretches of sleep it is a game. changer. I will share some tips that seemed to have work for us. baby started sleeping through the night (7+ hr stretches) around 11 wks, and shortly thereafter started sleeping 10-11hr stretches. We do bed-share occasionally, even now if he wakes up between 5-6a I pull him into bed with me and nurse in a side-lying position and we both fall asleep for a bit longer. It's really lovely to be able to do this.

Generic sleep advice

• I liked the book "The happiest baby on the block". It discusses the conditions in the womb, and how to recreate those as much as possible to soothe baby, especially during the 4th trimester. (spoiler- swaddle, "shhh"/white noise fairly loud (as loud as standing next to a shower), sucking on a pacifier, swaying (movement), oriented on baby's side).
• Some resources: TakingCaraBabies. You can follow on fbook/insta- they post great stuff. She also offers classes. We have all of her classes and really think it worked well for us, and we never felt like we were leaving baby to "cry it out" alone. We never let him cry for more than 5 min. She has a newborn class, one for 3-4 mo old, and then 5 mo+. I feel like each one supported baby where they were developmentally.
• Make the sleep space as conducive to sleep as possible- cool, white noise, and as dark as possible. Seriously- invest in blackout curtains/shades. (other than naps for the first few weeks which you want to keep light/noisy to help them establish their days/nights). Babies aren't scared of the dark, any light is just stimulation.

0-3 months

• Swaddles. Highly recommend swaddling. They just can't control their limbs at this age and they'll accidently jerk one and startle themselves awake. Swaddling helps with this, and makes them feel more like they are back in the womb which is comforting. So many parents say their baby hates the swaddle, and I don't know maybe they actually do, but baby would also struggle when we were putting him in the swaddle but then he would sleep so much better. We used the Halo (amazon link) and Nested Bean (amazon link). I liked the nested bean because it had the option of swaddling with hands up or hands down, it has the weighted bean on the chest which is comforting, and you can zip the sleeves off when you are ready to transition out of the swaddle. Although- the unzipping the sleeves didn't really work for us when we were trying to transition out, at that point we got the Magic Merlin Sleep suit (amazon link) and that helped us transition out of the swaddle.
• Babies should sleep a lot. You can look up average sleep per day hours and wake windows based on baby's age. I think in baby's first few weeks he got really crabby in the evenings because we were letting him get overtired. I think in the first month the goal is that they aren't awake for more than an hour at a time. We were kinda just winging it and didn't realize we should be trying to get him down to sleep fairly soon. At this point- when they wake up you feed and change them and then basically start getting ready for sleep again. You really want to try to avoid an over-tired baby, and it happens really fast and easily.
• We had baby sleep in a sidecar bassinet so he was easy for me to grab/feed during the night. When he was around 3 months old we moved the bassinet away from the bed but still in the room so we weren't waking each other up as much.
• Just to set reasonable expectations - any sleep on their own in the bassinet is a win. Hopefully you can get some night sleep there, unlikely that any naps will happen there. We did all contact naps (meaning- holding, wearing, cuddling) for those months and started trying 1 nap/day when he was around 8 weeks in his crib. At that point any naps done in a crib is a huge win. And those will probably be short.
• Naps don't typically lengthen/mature until about 5 months old. This is normal and expected. It's good to have reasonable expectations so you're not upset with yourself/baby. It's easy to obsess over things as a mom. Don't let naps steal your joy! Try to enjoy those baby naps on you. Use it as a time to rest/relax yourself.

3mo+

• Bed time routine- important to establish a consistent routine. Same order of events, same place, and around the same time per day (we target between 7-8p). Our routine: bath (if it's bath night, which we do every 2-3 days), diaper, massage/lotion, jammies, nursing, burp, in crib for 2 books, then swaddle/merlin suit/sleep sack, turn on white noise, lay down in crib/bassinet awake with pacifier.
• Around this time we really saw a reduction in night wakings once we were able to put him down awake at bedtime and let him fall asleep on his own. Around this time their sleep pattern changes to be more like an adult- and we naturally wake up several times in the night to check out our surroundings and if all is well fall back asleep often without even knowing we were awake. Example I read- if I fall asleep in bed and awake in the night in a neighbor's bed that would cause me to fully wake up and scream/cry. Same thing with baby. If they fall asleep being rocked in your arms and wake up alone on the mattress that can be alarming. If they fall asleep on their own then when they wake up in the same environment all is well and they can go back to sleep.
• That being said- we weren't able to just go from nursing to sleep (which is what we did for the first few months) to being able to put him down awake right away. This took time/patience. We worked our way down the intervention scale- nursing to sleep, then rocking to sleep, rocking til drowsy but putting down awake then rocking in bassinet, etc.
• Around 3 months old we disconnected the sidecar bassinet and moved it across the room. Then around 4-5 mo we moved baby into his own bedroom in the crib. This worked for us but this timeline varies a lot so do what works for you

What to do with baby when awake

Legitimate question that I hadn't considered until we were in the middle of it. In the first few weeks baby really doesn't have much awake time outside of eating/diaper changes. But here are some ideas:

• Baby wear and do whatever you want!
• Tummy time
• Massage
• Sing songs
• Get outside (but try to keep baby protected from sun)
• Read books

Pumping/Milk Maintenence

• I love my pumpables genie advanced - normally $180. https://pumpables.co/products/genie-advanced. I really like the liquid shield kids that go with these as well. These go on sale a couple of times throughout the year.
• For wearable collection cups- legendairy collection cups – normally $60. https://www.legendairymilk.com/products/sillicone-collection-cups. These are nice when you want even more portability (I can pump with these in a coffee shop and no one can really even tell)
• I also had the Spectra that my insurance gave me, and it’s nice and has nice suction. But no portability.
• For the love of pete- measure your nipples and get the right size flanges!! I’m a size 17 and I think that’s the average, but for whatever reason a lot of breast pumps send larger sizes by default.
• There’s lots of pumping bras but they never felt comfy to me. Ultimately my strategy was to wear nursing bras every day so I could nurse easily morning and evening and then do the nursing bra hack (link to video) when pumping
• As far as schedule goes- for the most part I would pump 3 times during a work day. Obviously this is just a rough estimate and things change as time goes on.
  • 6aish - baby wakes up and nurses on one side while I haakaa the other
  • 8:30 (after kids have left for daycare) - pump both sides
  • 11:30 - pump
  • 2:30 - pump
  • 5:30 - nurse baby
  • 7ish - nurse baby before bed
  • (once baby is sleeping through the night) 10pm - pump before going to bed
• I think there’s a “magic number” calculator you can google that helps you calculate the right number of times to pump/time to wait between to pumps based on different factors and if you want to decrease, increase, or maintain supply.
• During the day I always store my used pump parts in an air-tight container in the refrigerator between pumps and then deconstruct and wash them at night (recommend encouraging your partner to be the designated pump part washer every night). I think the CDC goes back and forth on whether this strategy is recommended, but I never had problems and I can’t imagine washing all the pump parts every single time.
• I always used the pitcher method - pump and then combine all the milk into a “pitcher” (I used a glass mason jar). I was lucky enough to be able to send my milk to daycare like this and she would pour from it to make the bottles. I know some daycares require pre-made bottles though.
• I would send fresh milk to daycare Tue-Fri of what I pumped the day before. On Friday I would freeze all pumped milk. On Monday I’d send a small amount of milk that I got from the haakaa over the weekend but otherwise baby would get thawed frozen milk that day (always the oldest in the freezer). This strategy was nice because mostly baby is getting fresh milk and you don’t have to constantly freeze everything, but you’re also still slowly working through freezer stash so things don’t get too old.
• On Fridays for freezing this is what I’d do:
  • Pour 4 oz into an easy-pour bottle (I froze in 4 oz increments but do whatever works best for you)
  • Pour into milk freezer bag (ie, lansinoh) - remove air bubbles (google tricks and you’ll find some videos to get rid of air bubbles)
  • Seal bag and place flat on cookie sheet
  • Repeat until all milk is bagged (depending on how much remaining milk I’d either freeze a smaller bag or leave it in the fridge and combine with haakaa milk over weekend)
  • Freeze the milk bags flat on the cookie sheet if possible (I have a chest freezer that I used)
  • Once frozen - transfer flat milk bags into gallon ziploc bags, layering from the bottom. I used the sit n stand bags. Once the gallon bag is full (I could fit 12 4-oz bags in) label it with dates and a number.
  • On your freezer where you’re storing milk have a milk sign in/out sheet - (ie, bag #1 went in on 1/1/22 and was taken out 5/1/22). This way when it’s time to take another frozen bag out you can look at the sheet and know which bag you’re looking for.

Other resources/random notes

• Baby products are ridiculously expensive, and babies grow so fast they only use/wear things for very short periods of time. Highly recommend buying second hand or borrowing from friends when you can. I was all over facebook marketplace during my pregnancy.
• If you're looking for data-driven resources to read I recommend Emily Oster's two books- "Expecting Better" regarding pregnancy, and "Cribsheet" which is data on decisions from birth to preschool.
• Have a bucket with a color-safe laundry soaking option handy for soaking blow-outs or heavily spit-up items. You don’t want those to sit until you do laundry next
• We used an app to track diapers, feedings, and sleep. We used Huckleberry and liked it, but there are lots out there. For awhile the doctor will ask how many wet/dirty diapers they are having a day and there's no way I could remember that. And I also could never remember which side I breastfed last on. Or tracking sleep so I could make sure I was getting him down for naps at reasonable time. We felt this was very helpful for a bit, but after awhile it was stressing me out more than anything, and at that point we stopped using it. Use it if/as long as it seems helpful and then stop. Matt and I were both able to have it on our phones logged into the same account so we could both use it to log stuff
• It helps to have constant reminders of tips from parenting resources that line up with your parenting strategies. Some pregnancy/parenting instagram accounts I like:
  • Expecting & Empowered
  • Karrie Locher
  • Solid Starts - they also have an app with a database of foods and how to offer them to babies. Use this all the time
  • Biglittlefeelings
  • Kids.eat.in.color
  • Feedinglittles
  • Takingcarababies - sleep tips
  • Raisinggoodhumanspodcast- also listen to the podcast and really enjoy it
  • Dog meets baby
  • Milestones and Motherhood
• Once baby is in a crib- do the lasagna style bed sheet layering. Mattress protector > sheet > mattress progrector> sheet. This way if baby has an accident in the night (vomit, pee-through, excessive spitup) you can just pull off the top sheet/protector and you’re ready to go. So you need at least two mattress protectors and sheets!
• Baby wearing- as a newborn I carried baby everyday in a Solly wrap and we loved it. Once he had better head/neck control and he was more interested in looking out we got more structured carriers. I use a lillebaby now and we also have an ergo baby that Matt uses. We have them fitted to each of us so we don't have to adjust, and we got them both used from friends.
• Set up a subscribe & save for the purple desitin (highest zinc)
• Get a costco membership. Buy all the diapers there. (I believe the kirkland diapers are just re-branded huggies). Sometimes they are on sale- buy as many as you can.

Product Recommendations/Baby Registry Ideas

I mentioned at the beginning but want to reiterate- baby products are expensive and they typically aren’t used for long. Highly recommend looking to get second hand when possible - friends, thrift stores, facebook marketplace, etc. Also- definitely make baby registries because you typically get a completion discount at a certain date to buy things off the registry at a discount (typically 15%). I usually make at least an amazon and target registry for each pregnancy and then maximize those registry discounts. Also- Bullseye Deals on Ebay is a reseller of target stuff (mostly new but also used so look before buying) at a discount!

• Tubby Todd all over ointment. I use this all the time on baby- helps with baby acne, dry patches, drool rashes, etc.
• We never bought a pack n play, figuring we would buy it if/when we needed it and we never have. I ended up buying a travel crib instead for traveling where we wouldn't have a crib (to Turks and Caicos). Both sets of grandparents had a pack n play we use when visiting, and most hotels offer them too. But when we actually needed one I was glad to take a travel crib instead of a pack n play (more portable and more comfortable for baby). Really like ours- Lotus Travel Crib
• Baby monitors - I do NOT recommend the nanit. We got it with baby and it was nice for the first year, but then after a year they hide all of the useful features behind a hefty subscription. This made me angry since the camera already is expensive. Plus at the time it didn’t support monitoring two babies but I think they’ve added that since then so that’s probably moot. We use a VTech camera monitor now that has two cameras and can monitor both kids at the same time.
• In addition to the camera monitor we also have cheap audio-only monitors in each kids room that we keep next to our bed (so audio only monitors stay in our bedroom just for during the night, then we have the video monitor on our main level for during the day).
• Snoo bassinet. For our first I swore I would never spend this much money for a product that would only be used for a few months. 1 month into our second and I broke down and got one for the hope it would help us sleep even just a little bit more. It worked for us!
• Baby shoes (once walking)- we love stride rite shoes for early walkers. You want a soft-soled shoe while they are learning to walk (or bare foot is best when safe!). You also want a shoe with a wide toe-box so their toes have room to splay out like they should. Croc Classic clogs are also great little kid shoes especially for summewater and really hold up (they have a much wider toe box than the Native brand shoes).
• Kamik winter boots for toddlers are the best boots that I’ve found- easy to put on (this is key!) and warm and dry.
• These are the best baby socks. None of the other ones we’ve tried stay on, and the grippies are key once they start walking.
• Sun safety: Sunday Afternoons sun hats are the best. ThinkBaby sunscreen is what we’ve used and trust (Thinksport is the same thing and sometimes cheaper). Although these Babyganics sunscreen sticks are also nice to have in diaper bags. These refillable roll-on sunscreen applicators are also kinda nifty.
• Absolutely love these diaper cream applicators (we call them the butt spatulas).
• Bath time safety: you need these cushions and spout cover.
• Car seats: I definitely recommend getting an infant car seat for the first year-ish as it’s just so much easier to lug baby around in an infant car seat as opposed to a bigger convertible car seat (infant car seats click out of the car so if baby falls asleep or whatever you can leave them in the seat. They can also click into strollers or other things). Convertible car seats are bigger and stay in the car.
  • I don’t have a strong recommendation for infant car seats- we used the Chicco keyfit system and have no complaints. If baby will be transported in multiple cars then ideal to get multiple bases.
  • Once baby outgrows the infant car seat (or you’re just ready to move on)- I highly recommend getting a revolving convertible car seat. The revolving feature is so clutch and makes it so much easier to get kids in/out! When I got ours these were pretty new to the market so there weren’t many options, but I got the Evenflo Revolve 360 and have no complaints. Love it. These revolve ones are certainly expensive, but they do go on sale periodically (especially black friday!). Key things to look for:
    • high rear-facing weight and height limits. Ideally keep kiddos rear-facing as long as possible because it’s safer, so having a car seat with higher limits makes that possible.
    • Fabrics/covers that are washable
    • Ideally 4 in 1 or at least 3 in 1 so it converts to a booster and kids can use it longer.
• Diaper bags are super personal preference, but after trying a couple I love my jujube ones hands down more than any other. They are pricey but go one sale on amazon sometimes.
• Get a quality thermometer. I’ve tried several but this is the winner. I believe docs recommend rectal ones for the first year, but personally I like the ear ones like this. Braun is what they use in the doctors offices I believe.
• Cups: When you start offering solid foods you typically also start offering water. We use the Munchkin weighted straw cups for water. Once they are done with bottles (around a year) we use the Munchkin 360 training cup for milk.
• You’ll need bibs when kiddo starts eating - recommend silicone ones.
• The Nose Frida snotsucker is certainly effective and I’ve always been glad to have it when I need it, but be prepared to get sick also.

Stepmom always get touchy when she’s drunk
I really am not sure if she’s interested in me but she’s always gets drunk and touches me slightly and it’s been progressing more and more. It started out with her getting drunk and coming in my bedroom sitting on my bed really close to me and expressing how much she loves me while her leg would be touching mine or she would have her hand on me and then she would give me a hug and squeeze me tightly and pretty much leave after that. Her and my dad fight sometimes and idk if she finds comfort in me or not. I’m handsome 19 year old and she’s in her 30’s pretty face nice body. The other day she came into my room drunk again and starts asking me why my bed is falling apart laughing because she knows it’s from me fucking girls in the bed and knocking the bolts loose. She may just have a flirtatious attitude. After that a cpl days go by and her and my dad are arguing while she’s drunk. She comes to my room and starts asking me what she’s doing wrong. I comfort her and tell her she’s doing good because she really is good to us. we go into the room right outside of mine and I sit down in a bean bag chair and she sits Indian style right in front of me venting to me, about how her and my dad don’t have a real relationship and how whatever I say to her will always stay between us and this whole time we are talking she has her leg on top of mine and I can feel her moving slightly like rubbing my leg with her leg just barley and keeps leaning in to get close and look me in my eyes. I was looking at her while she was in front of me like that and I felt tension for a second she was getting so close to my face I could feel her breath. Then a cpl days go by and her and my dad gets drunk again and he calls her a broke bitch when we live in her house and she buys me stuff all the time. she bought my bed lol but while they are arguing I’m laying in the living room cause my room is so hot and she comes down the stairs and ask if I’m sleeping in here and ask if my room was hot I say yea and she starts apologizing saying she accidentally turned the ac off and I tell her it’s okay I promise I don’t mind sleeping in here. She then walks over to me and ask what I’m watching and she says omg I love breaking bad your dad never watches it with me tho and I say awe I’m sorry that sucks. She sits down right next to me while I’m laying on the couch and wraps one of her arms around me while the other one is touching my side right next to my hips while I had a blanket over me, she barley snuck her hand under the blanket just enough to be touching me and have most of her arm besides her hand out from under the blanket. she is just loving on me telling me how sweet I am, I can feel her hand on my waist barley moving while we are talking, just her finger tips tbh touching my shirtless body barley, almost sneakily, like not enough that it’s obvious that she’s doing it on purpose but she can’t be touching me like that by accident theirs no way her fingers would just move so slightly on my stomach. after loving on me she grabs me and gives me a big kiss on the side of my head. She never wears a bra around me the whole time she was kissing me I could feel her bare chest through her shirt. She’s never given me a kiss before and I’ve only known her for 2 years. Maybe she’s interested in me or maybe I’m just misreading things. Oh another thing, one day I had a girl I was talking to over and my stepmom walked in on me getting head. This was before all of these incidents where she was getting touchy with me this was maybe 6 months ago. It was in the morning me and her had just woke up and we start playing around and she starts giving me head but we was in a odd position she had the blanket over her head but her body was exposed and I was laying with my head off the bed looking towards my door pretty much. I have a glass double doors to get to my bedroom and I have a black curtain hanging on the outside so you can’t see in without walking up and moving them. But she’s sucking my dick getting me close and I’m closing my eyes moaning and you can just see it in my face I’m in pleasure. I open my eyes and see my stepmom opening the curtain and looking in for a moment about to come in to bring me something and I lock eyes with her and my girl was still sucking my dick cause she didn’t know she was there you can tell I’m moaning kinda my mouth is open and I’m struggling to get the words out looking at my stepmom the whole time and I’m trying to tell my girl to stop but it’s hard to speak and my stepmom just kinda seen what was happening and seen her head going up and down and just put her hand up like pointing def not angry or upset like she just didn’t know what to do with herself and just like walked away kinda embarrassed.Any thoughts? Do y’all think she’s interested in me?

I'm sorry, this is a really long post but I'll bullet point most stuff down.
•The one big thing that makes me feel valid is that, when I was 11, my stepdad fingered me in my bedroom. I won't go in to too much detail or anything, it's unimportant. But the entire time he just stared at me and everything was silent, like he was waiting for my reaction. Our relationship has always been odd, so I wanted it. But eventually I got scared and told him something, I don't remember what it was but it got him to stop immediately and he apologised too. I don't remember much after, as in I don't know if he left my room or I left first, but I immediately went to the bathroom. Which was when I discovered I was bleeding. •Around this time, for some strange reason I would repeatedly say to him "fuck me daddy." This would either be in person, or over messages. I remember once, when I was in school, I messaged him that. He told me to stop in case one of my friends saw. I don't know why he didn't tell me to stop for other reasons. •One day, after telling him that in person, we were in my parents bedroom. I was sat on his bed and he was in front of me in his weird chair. He then started going in to detail about how I wanted him to fuck me, I can't remember exactly what he said, it was like I zoned out. Everytime I try to recall it now it literally feels like bugs start to crawl up me, I don't understand why. I remember the last part, and his really disgusting hushed and gentle voice. He asked if I wanted him to "cum inside of me", or he was just explaining how that would finish. I'm not really sure. •Still around this same time period of me being 11-12, I would ask him to 'squish me.' The reason why we would call it that is because I would be on my back, my legs would be up all the way to where my head is and he would be on top of me in a way that would 'squish me'. Basically like that one sex position. I would usually be wearing my school uniform when that would happen, so a skirt. During the 'squishing', he would push down on me, so our crotches would basically be against eachother. I don't know why, but I would continuously ask him to 'squish me' and during it I would even say the whole "fuck me daddy" thing. Only recently have I realised that he was probably just pretending to fuck me. •Other things had happened around that age too, like how we would talk about how many times we masturbated a day and compare it to eachother. Sometimes if I was abruptly going to my room, he would ask if I was going to go masturbate, since we were 'close like that' I would tell him. He would often recommend me NSFW Instagram model accounts. I was once tricked in to sending feet pics to this guy, which really isn't that serious and whenever I brought it up with friends they find it fucking hilarious. But the detail I always leave out is that, I did bring that up with my stepdad and he proceeded to tell me that he already knew. Which means he was spying on me through the crack of the door. If that already didn't bother me, I don't understand why he just allowed me to send those pictures, if he was watching why the hell didn't he stop me? •I'm pretty sure this also happened around the age of 11 as well, recently, a memory resurfaced but I barely remember it. Basically, I was sucking on his neck. I don't remember who said it, but either him or my mum spoke up and laughed, saying that I needed to stop otherwise I would "give him a hickey." The reason why I wouldn't be surprised if my mum was in the room at the time is because she doesn't care about what he does. She knows everything and just doesn't fucking care. •I'm very sure that, around that age, my parents begun to expose me to their loud sex. I wouldn't be surprised if it started even younger, however. Obviously, I tried to bring it up with them at the ripe old age of 11 and my mum immediately shot me down with a "it's natural." This only stopped recently, around this year, because I had a big panic attack over hearing them and my mum finally felt guilty. I started getting panic attacks over it the minute it started, maybe the panic attacks were a sign of the trauma when I was younger, but I'm convinced it is now. I heard it so many times that I began to get paranoid every night, I would start to hear it even if they weren't upstairs (I sound crazy, I know.) I would get so anxious every night in case I would hear it, to the point I started to really resent them from it. I know fine well I could just go to sleep before them, but sometimes they even woke me up with it, on numerous occasions. •I'm convinced my stepdad wanted me to hear it. Around the time of it finally stopping, I got mad because i was hearing it again (I'm unsure if it was due to me hearing shit or they actually were) but it caused me to take my bedding and go downstairs to sleep. In the morning, I was rudely awoken to my stepdad slamming the door open and storming past. He's not usually like that when people are sleeping, so it instantly gave me the impression that he was pissed off and the only reason I can think of is that he was angry I wasn't there to listen. •He used to tease me for my paranoia to. As a way to discourage them from getting intimate, I would leave my door open at night. This happened around this year, but I was doing that again and I messaged my stepdad if they were actually going to sleep. It then somehow turned to him making a dig about how he knew I gets anxious at night and when I asked why he sent me "In case me and your mam have sex. 😜" Before, I tried to resolve this issue by begging them to just tell me if they were gonna have sex or not so I could sleep downstairs (because I was gonna find out the hard way anyways.) And they kept on refusing? Which just gave me the impression that they wanted me to listen more. •Around 11 again, he would often tell me details about his and my mums sex life. Like how he was always good at pulling out and the only time he would wear a condom is right when he was about to finish. But the reason why my sister came to be was because he just failed to pull out that one time and my mum refused to get an abortion. Another time, he went on about how him and my mother had sex during her period and how they had to use towels and they didn't enjoy it because it was too messy. •I don't know if he did things before the age of 11, my memories are very faded and it's like there are major gaps throughout everything. I'm worried that he did, however. When I was very young, I remember having no accidents at all during the night. But then, around the ages of 9, I would have an accident basically every night and would get a lot of water infections. I know that's a classic sign of child sexual abuse, but I don't want to jump to conclusions or anything. •Another reason as to why I believe more things had happened to me than what I know of is because I always seemed to know what sex was when I was young, but I wouldn't know the name or anything specific about it like how to get pregnant or what cum was. Though, even though I didn't know what it was, it was like I always thought about it, I could never not think about sex, it was disgusting. This stayed until I was around 13. I remember where I even asked my 'boyfriend' at the time, we were both around 8, if he wanted to have sex, and I have no idea why. •Over the years, he would flash me frequently. Everytime, I would always believe it was an accident because he'd never acknowledge it, besides from that one time which he always jokes about it and blames me. Everytime he would flash me, it would either be because of a convenient hole in the crotch of his pants or because he was wearing very lose fit shorts and it would just be hanging out. The more I think about it, I'm very sure he would have been able to feel such a thing, especially when it was poking out of the hole, but it was like he was just oblivious. •For some strange reason, when I was younger, I would make comments about small dicks. I don't know if I was commenting on his dick specifically, but he would always say the same thing. "Width matters more than length." •Recently, around 16-17, he made a joke about how he listens to me masturbating. Once he noticed how shocked I looked, he then went on saying about how my vibrator is too quiet to hear. •Around 17 again, I went to use the shower. The shower I use is the one that's connected to my parents room. When I locked the door, he got madish and started making comments about it. I had to defend myself, saying how 'the door would open on it's own if I didn't lock it'. Eventually, he backed off. •I don't understand the point in the fucking door and lock to my bedroom anymore. Whenever I decided to lock my door, my parents start shouting at me through the walls, asking why I locked my door. My stepdad barely knocks, it's like a tap and he doesn't even wait sometimes. I remember seeing a past message from an old friend saying how he tried to walk in when I was changing and that he knew I was changing. I didn't explain myself, I really wish I did because I don't remember this. •(Around 17.) We were messaging eachother and it somehow turned in to him hinting if I saw this one animated video, it was a porn one. I said no, and to that he sent me a screenshot of it. It wasn't anything bad or anything, just the start of it and nothing was revealing, he then asked if I was sure. And how he was surprised that I hadn't. •(Around 17.) I don't really get my period, we still don't know why. But as I was getting a lot of blood tests, my stepdad was trying to check things off the list of what it could be. One of those being that my opening is just extremely tight I guess, because he asked if I ever tried penetrating myself. I admitted that I did, but I couldn't get it to exactly go in. Which he then decided to make a comment saying how It's just my 'technique'. I wonder if the only reason he asked that was to see if I ever tried anything out of morbid curiosity. •(Around 17 again.) He randomly bought me dildo's once, I didn't ask him for them, he just bought them for me and it was wildly uncomfortable. Once he gave me them, he asked if I wanted him to show me how to use them. I said no, which he then said something about how if I ever did then I could ask him. I worry what would have happened if I did say yes. •When I was around 14, I went glamping. I ended up having to share a bed with him. One of the nights, I woke up to his hand just on top my crotch. I tried grabbing it and moving it away but it just fell back down on to it. I don't know if he put it back there on purpose. I still question if it was a dream, I'm very sure it wasn't because I remember going back to sleep, but it still just bugs me. •Around 17, I was upset for some reason and he was comforting me. During this, he randomly grabbed the inside of my thigh. I usually just wear a shirt and boxers, so he basically just grabbed my naked thigh but I don't know if he was doing it in a comforting way. •Usually when I draw, I have my knees up to my chest so it's easier to use my tablet. Considering what I wear for pyjamas, I can always see him looking at my crotch when he comes in to my room. If he really can see everything I don't understand why he doesn't just tell me to put my legs down. •He's made a lot of uncomfortable jokes over the years too. One of the ones that upsets me sometimes is that, when he was measuring me for a binder, I was constantly moving around because it was uncomfortable since I was just in a sports bra. As he was leaving, I think I told him about how it was uncomfortable for me or something along those lines. He then turned around and shouted "oh come on, it's not like i was fingerings your pussy or anything." •Very recently, I asked him if I looked okay before going to college. After a bit of back and fourth he said "I wouldn't kick you out of bed, maybe you could find someone in college who would do the same." •Other times when I asked him if I looked okay, he'd go on tangents about how my ass is great or how he would date me or be too nervous to talk to me if he was my age. •One of the more recent jokes was when I dropped a mayonnaise lid on my lap. Nothing got on me, but my stepdad turned to me then turned to my mum and shouted "if anyone starts accusing us, just tell them it was mayonnaise!" Or something like that. •I remember after we watched the new mean girls film, he started going on saying about how he wanted to rewatch it for the Halloween seen (if you know you know) for the 'panty action'. Which rubs me the wrong way because I'm very sure the girls are supposed to be around my age. •I'm very sure he also made this fake account, pretending to be one of my old groomers that I tried to cut off, just to message me about nsfw topics and ask for pics. It's a whole long yap about paranoia and just suspicions so I won't get into it though. If I tried to provide all the evidence I have, it'll take forever and there's no point.
There's definitely way more things that he's said, joked and done. But I'm only now beginning to realise that they're not okay. Even when I was younger, I was sort of uncomfortable around the jokes so I would just zone out, leading me to not remembering them now.
I probably will never accept that what happened to me was bad, or a big issue. Especially due to the 'lovely' people on here. Thank you for telling me immediately that I was a liar before you even knew what happened, that I shouldn't blame an 'innocent man', that you hope he comes in and rapes me to the point I split open and bleed. Thank you for telling me that my parents were just trying to promote a sex positive household, that some of the things were questionable at most. Thank you so much for saying I deserved it because I didn't send you pictures. You all made me feel like shit and I'm probably never going to tell people in person what happened to me, out of fear I would be ridiculed due to how much of a baby I'm being. I wasn't raped, so I have no place to cry or even think about it. I'm being overdramatic.
If you even read to this point, you're an angel.

Warning this is going to be a VERY LONG post. I am just going to start plain and simple. I (M23) have been friends with this girl (F23) for the past 8 or so years now since high school. For brevity I will refer to her as “Lara”. Overtime we have become incredibly close to one another. She often confides in me first on very serious topics and I will spend hours on the phone talking to her about various subjects and her relationships (she is a serial monogamist). I also visit her quite often even though she lives about an hour away for school.
This past weekend is when things get a bit more confusing in my own mind. I went to the movies with some other friends of mine. We got drinks at a cocktail bar before hand. During the conversation it came up that two of my newest acquaintances (both women) assumed I had dated Lara in the past or that we were currently dating and that from an outside observer that’s what it looked like. I wasn’t shocked by this statement as other people had assumed me and her were a couple before in the past and male friends of mine have even asked permission to see her in the past, even though I’ve never been an item with her.
The movie let out at almost 1 in the morning. My friend Lara has expressed interest in meeting up after my screening to hang out, I failed to mention this to the group. I noticed my two females friends seemed a bit put off by this. And their words were ringing in my head as I thought about how she drove across town at like 1 am on a Sunday to hang with us. We returned to the cocktail bar in which I immediately offer to buy Lara a drink. The hour passes the bar closes and we decide to go home, when walking to our cars I keep brushing Lara’s hand on accident. For some reason it made me start to feel weird maybe it was what was said earlier by my other friends, but the energy just felt different than usual.
The next day Lara and I went shopping. Where she made several jokes about us pretending to be a couple. Which is a joke we have made before in the past. She is currently seeing someone right now, but was joking about us being a couple taking a cooking class or how I’d be pushing a stroller, with her and her new man’s child in it. I’m not a very overly masculine man or someone who has a lot of machismo, yet it felt oddly emasculating to hear her say that.
When she was shopping she was trying on some dresses and asking my opinion. Now I know Lara is attractive but she looked so good in this one dress, I hate to say it since she is my friend but I was checking her out like crazy. I offered to buy it for her. She refused the offer (which is fine since I’m pretty irresponsible with money). However the whole shopping experience and how genuinely happy I felt made me wonder “oh God do I like Lara”. Like I said I know she is attractive and it’s not like I’ve never entertained the idea of us doing things. But we are such genuine friends that it’s so past that point in our relationship, it feels like she’s my sister sometimes. And I know all her baggage and dirty laundry, so that feeling is usually not there.
So I decided to turn to Reddit for some advice (lol) and started to read a bunch of stories about platonic relationships, and started to realize that maybe Lara and I did not have a normal Platonic relationship. I was reading from other users in platonic relationships as they described incidents in which they were cuddling their friends. Much to my surprise most commenters said this is something that platonic friends do not do. Which is a problem because Lara is quite touchy. For example a couple of months ago after a night out drinking I was back at Lara’s apartment when I asked if I could sleep in bed with her, since I’m too tall for her couch and it always fucks up my back. I was planning fully on just staying on my side of the bed. But before I’m even in the bed she tells me to take off my pants since I’m wearing jeans. I do and get in bed I’m ready to just pass the fuck out and go to bed but she says “are you going to cuddle me?” Almost like it was an expectation for me to do so, I end up spooning with her all night. In the morning we just relaxed in her bed, she asks for me to rub her foot and massage her leg. And it’s like super incredibly casual she’s just showing me things on her phone as I’m just rubbing up her leg which she has across my body.
If it was an isolated incident I’d say whatever. But it’s not. Over the years I ’m constantly giving her back massages under her bra, rubbing her feet, and even during a leg massage in which when I asked “where she wanted me to massage” she said “higher” and so I did but when it wasn’t high enough she directed me to her inner thigh.
And now this is stupid but I’m thinking “wait does Lara like me?”
I almost doubt this assertion because I am nowhere near her type. I’m like super out of shape. And she likes super masculine guys. Which is something I am not. And she is always insisting I get a girlfriend or hook up with a girl. The past boyfriends she has been with all have been pretty bad and I have helped her go through all of the breakups. Which is a problem within in itself because it feels like her trauma is my trauma, and I feel like I take on a lot of emotional stress from relationships that aren’t mine. Her newest guy seems to be the best so far so that’s a relief. Someone in another thread referred to this kind of relationship as a “Boyfriend without benefits” and unfortunately it’s made me resent when she calls me
I also asked my friend before I posted this and he says he doesn’t think she likes me like that and that it’s pretty normal that we look like a couple. Maybe I’m just bummed that we are platonic actually. She has called me her “platonic soulmate”What do y’all think is our relationship platonic?
TLDR: after a comment by other friends, I am wondering if my longtime friend and I are more than just platonic and if her touchy behavior is a part of it

Hi, I am 17f and have been confused about my gender for awhile, although only now(like half a year or 2 atleast) realising it might be more serious than I thought.
I never really thought about gender as kid even correcting people when they got it 'wrong' although I never hated it and half the time didn't correct it. Although when hitting puberty I began to dislike being a girl even refusing to wear or go shopping for a bra (I never got a properly fitted bra till 3yrs after developing breasts) and I refused to shave until picked on by family and feeling judged, although most times I didn't and would hide it with clothes (I thought that I did this thinking it was just a hassle and thinking why should a shave and be picked on by boys with hairer legs than me).
Last year I started growing my hair out and dressing more feminine (I hadn't had long hair since the 2nd grade, although i thought that was normal as 1 of my sisters and my mum have also always had short hair most of my life). I started having stronger feeling about hating being a girl around this time (although I don't know if thats the right words) and realised how I've acted and felt about gender like how I've always hated being called ma'am and lady but didnt mind when people called me sir by accident, I have shaved all my hair off again after this relisation became more promanint.
But this is where I've been kinda of confused, I love the idea of being a guy but I dont think I genuinely hate being a girl, maybe if I just didnt have a chest and had a deeper voice I would be happy, but then sometimes I dont feel like I hate my chest and I like dressing up although thats very rare and I think I would just end up being a feminie guy especially if I was born a guy, I wonder if I would have also questioned my gender if I was born a guy.
I should also note that I don't think I like being percieved as a girl or how people will percieve me as less masculine just because of that fact even though I've always felt more masculine even when not presenting so.
So I was wondering is this normal for cis woman or normal for trans men and there experiences as some have told me 'girls feel this way, espcially when women aren't treated the nicest that it's ok to wish you could have it as good as your male counterparts' (maybe they aren't understanding the whole story when saying this...?). Could I also be blowing my own thoughts out of preportion to seem like I'd rather be a guy like maybe I'm nit picking the moments where I've felt like this as I haven't always presented masculine and played with 'girls toy' just as much as 'boys toys' or the fact that I did wear feminine clothes as a kid but I don't think I really cared what I wore at all then.

TL/DR: I am grateful to find this community and looking for recommendations for a full coverage, center pull strap, t-shirt bra in likely size 30D.
Like many of you, my world was shook when I discovered the ABTF calculator. I'm 55 and all my life have had self esteem issues about the small size of my breasts. For most of my adult life, I've worn a comfortable 36A, which now I know is a ridiculous size for me. But what is my right size? Well, it has been a journey to find out...
Each time I measure and use the calculator I get something different, so I hesitate to even share my measurements (I clearly am an unreliable measurer!). The first time the calculator said I was a 28D but would likely be more comfortable in a 30C. I ordered a few 30C bras and none of them fit (later I realized that I need to start with unlined, seamed bras).
The second time I measured, it told me 28C but more comfortable in 30B. The third time it split the difference (not kidding): 28C/D but likely more comfortable in 30B/C. After this, I went to Nordstrom and tried on bras in the widest variety of these sizes they had available, which wasn't many and all of them were molded/contour bras. I accidently picked up a 30D, and lo and behold, it was the best fit but still a little big.
After ordering and trying on 4 more bras in the 28D/28DD/30C family that didn't fit, I was getting frustrated. I used the Bratabase measuring tool, and it told me I was 30D/30DD. Ugh!
By this point, I had learned some things. I have wide set breasts and a lot of the tissue has migrated sideways under my arms. The underwires are helping me scoop and swoop and put everything in the right place, but the seams that hold in the wires are really irritating my underarms. I also have sloping shoulders and need closer set/center pull straps (but can't stand racerback). I am not sure about fullness - with some bras I seem to have gaps at the bottom and am bulging at the top; others there is puckering at the top. I like how the full coverage bras fit best. One of my breasts is much smaller than the other (because of an ill-advised surgical biopsy under the nipple) and this is leading to a lot of my sizing issues. The "too big" bras often are only too big on one side and can't be fixed by simply tightening that one strap.
I did much more research and ordered many more recommended bras in the 30D/30DD family. Some bras have come close to fitting! I have found that the 28 band might fit a little better on its own, but the cups on a 28 band are far too close together for me in almost all cases. On some of the 30 band bras that come close to fitting, I do need to clasp on the middle hooks instead of loosest. My six measurements retaken today: underbust - 29.5/29/27.75, overbust - 32/33.5/33 (which does suggest 30D - sheesh).
Now I'm ready to share the results of my 30 tried-on bras and ask for any recommendations. I don't actually want an unlined bra - I only ordered them to help find my fit. What I want is a properly sized, comfortable, contour bra to wear to work! I'm hoping for help in where to turn next without ordering 30 more bras...
TOO SMALL

• Bare The Wire-Free Front Close 30C
• Bare The Favorite Wire-Free Smoothing T-Shirt 30C
• Reveal Low-Key Wire-Free T-Shirt 30C
• Natori Feathers 30B, 30C, 30D, 30DD
• Wacoal Wire Free Molded 30B
• B.Tempt'd Underwire Molded 30C
• Natori Minimal Push-Up 30D
• Skarlett Blue Minx 28DD
• Simone Perele Confiance Seamless Triangle Plunge 30C
• Freya Starlight Underwire Side Support 28D
• Freya Expressions Underwire Plunge 28D
• Freya Offbeat Side Support 30D

TOO BIG

• Freya Starlight Underwire Side Support 28DD
• Freya Idol Underwire Molded T-Shirt 28D
• Panache Porcelain Elan Molded T-Shirt 28DD
• Aubade Softessence Plunging Triangle Underwire 30C
• Cleo Faith Molded Plunging 28E
• Panache Jasmine Balconnet 30D
• Panache Clara Lace Full Cup 30D
• Fantasie Adelle Underwire Side Support 30D
• Freya Offbeat Side Support 30DD
• Natori Beyond Convertible Contour Underwire 30DD

ALMOST FIT

• Natori Allure Bliss 30D (slight gapping in one cup)
• Freya Starlight Side Support Underwire 30D (slight puckering on one cup, have to use middle hooks, uncomfortable under arms)
• Fantasie Fusion Full Cup Side Support 30DD (love the look best, slight puckering on one cup, have to use middle hooks, uncomfortable under arms)
• Wacoal Halo Lace Unlined Underwire 30D (this fits best so far, but uncomfortable under arms)
• Natori Beyond Convertible Contour Underwire 30D (this fits and feels the best so far)

Monday
Dimmy: I hope you all had a great Mother’s Day! Stevie Kate surprised me with a balloon, baguette, half-eaten apple, and pinworms she picked up from the feral Denner tots, and I surprised Stevie Kate and London with a Sol Brush powdered sunscreen shill and carcinogenic particles of zinc oxide and titanium dioxide in their lungs. Stevie Kate’s spent the past 48 hours in her pajamas tearing through a bag of rotisserie chicken, so I decided to resume potty training to get her to stop binge-eating chicken. I am finally ready to start potty training again now that we are going through so many diapers with twice as many Contentots in the house.
Dimmy: Ta da! Here is Stevie Kate’s adorable potty setup! Complete with balloons and princess underwear! Stevie Kate, are you ready to go on the potty and wear your underwear? Stevie Kate: I’m ready right now! Neighbor Boy Harry: Uh… Imma head out and go help my mom with her shitty stationery line! 🏃‍♂️🎒
Tuesday
Dimmy: Would you like to give us an update on how potty training is going? Sassy Kate: Would you like to give us an update on how you and daddy exploit your children on the internet for financial gain? Dimmy: I’ll give you a cookie if you detail every bodily function from the past 24 hours. So Fed Up Kate: I’ll give you a swift kick in your bad knee if you don’t stop talking about my toilet training. Dimmy: That’s it, your punishment for being sassy is you have to stay in your pajamas again all day. Sleepwear Kate: We all knew that was going to happen anyway.
Dimmy: I need to get your guys’ thoughts. With potty training, do I just stay at home? Or do I carry the miniature singing toilet with balloons attached everywhere we go? I’ve been staying at home the past 24 hours and it is torture! We haven’t even been able to go visit the Astroturf at the shopping center by our house. Stevie Kate’s been doing pretty good. We’ve had a couple accidents today, but she’s been doing really well for the most part- OW! Why did you kick me in the knee, Stevie Kate? Here, go play with this bag containing an entire rotisserie chicken and eat as much of it as you want. Mommy’s busy talking to the people in her phone who fund our lifestyle. Anyway, I can’t just stay inside for the next two weeks! That’s insanity! I need your help! How do I go out with Stevie Kate while potty training? Drop your tips in the box! I know I could just ask my sisters, Iris, or Meta AI on Instagram instead, but that doesn’t drive up my engagement numbers like responses from you sorry losers do!
Dimmy: Speaking of Iris, I did text it for craft ideas to keep School’s Out Kate busy this summer. Also I contacted Iris for a color analysis and Iris responded that bright orange parachute I wore car shopping looked great with my skin tone, and I should consider cutting up some of the parachute material to sew it into a dress. I tried to explain to Iris that it already was a dress, albeit a voluminous one, but Iris just responded with these bizarre outfit suggestions of monochromatic business looks for fall and winter where each outfit is the color of Tiffany’s self-tanner-applied orange skin. I tried to tell Iris it’s summer time and it’s hot as fuck here in Texas, plus I mainly wear athleisure and billowy dresses, not business clothes, but Iris said who cares, these aren’t real clothes anyway, just weird hypothetical Fashion Plates looks a robot mocked up. Iris said whatever I do, to avoid wearing cheetah print. What the fuck! That’s never going to happen. I love cheetah print. Still, I think you gullible assholes should subscribe to Iris anyway and use my code BOYAREYOUDUMB for 50% off your first month! Don’t you want to be able to TEXT Iris instead of carry a computer around 24/7 to use ChatGPT? I know that question makes no sense, since you don’t need four laptops in a Nordace backpack to use ChatGPT, but all of my followers are gullible idiots and will subscribe to Iris despite my idiotic statements!
Thursday
Dimmy is wearing loads of dark makeup and another gigantic billowy dress, and you know what that means… time to go car shopping again with paid pal Diana! Dimmy shared stories from Wednesday’s car shopping excursion to Hyundai and Kia and once again the trimmed-down troll was “too busy” to go along. Sidekick Kate was a good sport through the whole car shopping ordeal, despite hopping from bathroom to bathroom, the charge running out on her Tonies box, and her Mylar princess balloon sailing away in search of a beach to pollute. Screenie Kate forgave Dimmy for losing her balloon since she knows there’s always plenty more where that came from and she has Wina from Balloonish on speed dial. Dimmy sailed from new car to new car thanks to a strong breeze and her billowy dress, looking for the SUV with the most charging ports for all of her devices and the largest number of adjustable cup holders big enough to fit even the most gigantic of Stanley cups in her collection. She found the “Hun-Die” Palisade fit the bill, with chargers and cup holders galore. She wasn’t as impressed with the Kia “Tell-a-ride” because it didn’t have as many cup holders and ports to charge her numerous devices. Dimmy is now torn between buying either the Palisade or the Escalade because those were the only cars she found that rhymed with “getting paid.” Should she go with the practical, convenient “Mom car” Palisade or the super nice and luxurious Escalade?
Today Jen is grateful Kimmy, Stevie Kate and London are coming over to bring hugs and content. Stevie Kate was excited to show off her potty training progress to Minnie and Papa.
Jen: Stevie Kate, what are we doing today? Sugarless Kate: Baking sugar-free cookies on this damn, dirty floor, like usual. Jen: Why are you using ghost-shaped cookie cutters? Spooky Kate: Because Mommy is a ghost! Jen: Your Mommy is a ghost? Stevie Chef: Yes! Because I want her to disappear!
Tiffany was furious when she saw on stories that Kimmy, Stevie Kate and London were getting all of Jen’s gratitude and attention, so she threw a giant bow and no shoes on Lily and sped over to crash their party and divert all the attention to herself. She immediately whipped out her boobs to shill her Eby bra when she saw Dimmy nursing, claiming she and Jen might start lactating at any moment. Then she publicly shamed Stevie Kate for having an accident in her car seat on the way to Jen’s.
Meanwhile, London is still alive despite the clouds of Sol Brush sunscreen powder raining down on her face yet again as Dimmy’s fascination with demonstrating how to use the high-commission product continues. Dimmy headed to the airport to pick up yet another sister to help her out with London, but not before posting a Ritual vitamin shill so she could take the day off stories tomorrow.
Saturday
London is finally being a cooperative Contentot, smiling for Instagram from beneath her giant bow, and doing a picture-perfect Swaddle Stretch channeling her older sister’s performances from back in her newborn days.
Sol Brush is back in stock and Dimmy is bursting with joy at all the commission she’s going to make from more sales of the ineffective sunscreen, her kids’ lungs be damned. If Sunburnt Kate doesn’t convince Dimmy’s followers it doesn’t work, I don’t know what will.
Stevie Sunburn headed indoors to get a break from the sun and play with the robot bug toy Dimmy’s sister brought her. Thank goodness the Tacky Screech Owl found an Amazon link for the gift so she can make money off that too. Dimmy even had an active Active Skin Repair code, so she shilled it them sprayed Stevie Sunburn to give her some relief.
Street Urchin Kate looked like a Victorian Orphan by mid-afternoon as her Belle princess dress mopped up dirt, sidewalk chalk, Dimmy’s makeup, and everything else in her path. Dimmy left Disheveled Kate with her sister and cleaned herself up, threw on her Paris dress, and headed to a baby shower for the Houghtons’ wealthy family friend Anna. The beautiful florals and tasteful spread at Grange Hall were too elegant for the tacky turtle bunch, so Jen set the centerpiece flowers on fire with the votive candles to protest the lack of balloon arches, then escaped by helicopter to go terrorize another Texas city, Austin.
With two days off this week and tomorrow being Sunday, Dimmy’s Saturday shilling was at an all-time high. She’s linking up everything but the kitchen sink, and she’d link that up too if she had a code for it.

Hi guys,
Basically I've got a huge dilemma. And I just need some input. I've always hated my chest. And when I was younger I wish I had an accident to remove them. Not to mention how I genuinely wished I had a pp. But not always. Sometimes I do love my chest but other days I genuinely wish there were gone. I used to cry about having a chest lol. On days I hate my chest I do wear a sports bra as I cant afford a binder as its the closest to a 'flat chest' as possible. I have looked at the possibility of chest tape but my boobs are a bit too big for them lol. My ftm friend offered me his binder but it was too loose RIP.
When I was younger I was your typical girl but growing older I've grown to be more masc and I genuinely don't know whether that was because I was overweight and body shy or living in a pretty traditional house where men r the head. So I genuinely don't know if I'm still living with the repercussions of that since growing up I did everything to avoid the general 'female norm' if that makes sense?
I have 2 ftm friends and when they told me they started T I got insanely jealous of them. Yes I'm happy for them but deep down I lowkey felt a bit sad? Knowing I wont get a deep voice, facial hair etc
As a teen I used to watch hella trans YouTubers and transition videos for absolutely no reason. Same thing happened with Lesbian shows/mangas and I funnily I am a lesbian. But my issue is I do enjoy being a girl but sometimes the thought of being a guy creeps in and it messes me up lol. I may be a lesbian but I'm not too educated on the other parts of the LGBTQ community so I've come here for help lol.
Also I have been thinking this for a few years now but then the sudden wave of 'Omg I like being a girl' hits and I forget all about it until the ftm wave hits again lol
I have talked to my 2 trans friends about this but I just wanted more general input.