Humorous romantic wedding poems

*I have never been married or engaged
About Me:
Adventurous spirit: 37-year-old content creator with a flexible schedule, I crave freedom and love exploring new places through trekking, camping, and epic road trips. ️⛺️
Culinary maestro: My passion lies not only in creating engaging content, but also in whipping up delicious meals and, of course, my legendary apple pie. ‍
Driven and grounded: I value hard work and career growth, but maintain a positive attitude and prioritize a healthy lifestyle (non-smoker, non-drinker, drug-free).
Feline fanatic: For 17 years, my loyal cat companion has been by my side, and I'm a huge animal lover.
Youthful zest: Despite a strong hairline, I embrace a humorous personality and kind-hearted nature, though I sometimes wear my heart on my sleeve. ❤️
Hopeless romantic at heart: I believe in the magic of connection, seeking someone who shares my love for growth and strives to be their best self.
Looking For:
Partner in adventure: Someone who joins me on life's journeys, be it exploring new cities or cozy nights in. We'll laugh together, share dreams, and build a supportive partnership.
Family-oriented soul: I value family and envision a future filled with love and laughter, open to someone who might have children or shares similar aspirations.‍‍‍
Playful spirit: A partner who brings humor, lightheartedness, and a sense of fun into our lives. Let's chase sunsets, share silly jokes, and make every day an adventure!
Growth mindset: You're always learning, evolving, and open to new experiences. Together, we'll inspire and support each other's journeys.
Humble and open-minded: You value authenticity, respect diverse perspectives, and embrace life with a carefree spirit.
I'm not seeking perfection, but a genuine connection with someone who shares my values, loves to laugh, and believes in the power of growth. Let's create a love story filled with adventure, laughter, and endless possibilities.

I'm doing that silly teenager thing where I dream of unrealistic romantic relationships and I've decided to write it down for once, because its fun and why not.
In my adult life, I wanna move to Salem, MA, or somewhere in that state. I like Massachusetts, I vibe with the people there better than the south.
I want to meet a girl in some unspecified way (because that's hard and my imagination isn't that good and this is my story I do what I want) and then fall in love, because this is a romance thing, it would be weird if we didn't.
I wanna move in with her, in some old victorian-style house. We'd put a room just for reading in, fill it with books.
We'd attract crows to our house, they're smart creatures and they're cool as fuck, and having your house covered in crows is gnarly.
We could own a boat maybe? I don't sail. I don't know. I just think it could be cool I'm not thinking about it that hard.
We could drive around and run errands together. Fall in love with each other and fall in love with the mundane. Listen to music, have a good time, bask in eachother's company.
We could go on dates. Y'know. Like couple do sometimes. But, like, stupid ones, like gokarting or bowling or just sitting on the beach staring at the birds. Or staying in and getting way too competitive about mario kart.
Maybe, since we live in salem, she's a witch. Not, like, pointy hat cartoon witch, I've known a few people who practice modern witchcraft and although I don't believe in it I do think its pretty neat. And I'd support it and we could go and buy ouija boards and silly stuff in the various tourist-trap witch stores. Maybe even a pointy hat, because cliches are fun sometimes.
Anyways, thus concludes my random yearning. I could go on like this for a while but typing on a phone for that long is comparable to torture.
Goodbye, and sorry for making you read that.

I'm writing this on a throwaway account since these people know my main and actively engage with it. This is also gonna be a pretty long post since I'd like to provide context on how I even ended up where I am today so strap on in. Also apologies if any of this doesn't make sense, I'm pretty upset and stressed out and I've not slept in what feels like weeks. I have a lot of anxiety about all of this.
I started my first year in uni last year in September and met a couple of people I thought were nice enough on the first day. I'll call them 'G' and 'M'. I thought they were nice at first and we got closer as the weeks went by. G and M are also engaged so we talked about weddings quite often. They're are also cosplayers which becomes key in this. We got a lot closer around a time they were going to a con. Their previous friend had dropped out last minute but since they had already paid for everything they invited me. I also wanted to get into cosplaying at the time so I saw this as a perfect opportunity. I would spend nights at their dorms getting know them and we instantly got a long.
At the time, I was very nieve to all the red flags they were presenting as they were unusually willing to let me know EVERY detail of their life, including their sex life and what not. I found it werid but chalked it up to them being very comfortable around me which I found to be a compliment at the time but looking back, I now knew what was up.
(A little but of important info here but I had just feld a country 5 months prior to escape the abuse I was experiencing at home and went to live with my mum. G and M knew this and knew about my dad in depth)
Con comes around and they introduced me to a group of friends who were instantly very reserved around me. I chalked it up to nerves and thought that maybe they're just nervous which is understandable. This was until everytime I would speak they would give me dirty looks, talk over me and even dismiss me. M had also picked up a habit of making a lot of things about himself and anything I found interesting, he would make it clear that he didn't want to know, even telling me that he just doesn't want to hear it. When I went to meet a YouTube who attended the con, he seemed annoyed when I was excited and told me to stop being so excited since this was his 3rd time meeting them.
By time I got back home, their dismissing and also just really shitty attitude throughout left a sour taste in my mouth. However, I just chalked it up to nerves at the time.
A month goes by and they intoeduce me to another cosplayer who I quickly became friends with. When I told G about this, they told me to stop talking to them since I'll brea their heart as they "fall in love easily". I really didn't get that sentiment but still continued talking. Nothing romantic was ever talked about.
Then I started feel more attached to these people. They were practically in my life 24/7, I wa sin their dorms over nights almost everyday and began picking up the same eating habits as them as well. It's also worth noting that these people are "disabled" which is still up to debate.
They would frequently interrupted anything I enjoyed and conveniently pass out EVERYTIME I talked about something I liked or wanted to do. I also suffer with VERY acute psychosis which has been well treated for many years. They would constantly tell me that any doubts I had were just to do with my paranoia and that I should just ignore it. That or they would tell me that I was being manipulative and seeking attention.
This was all very sus but up until the incident I chalked it up to learned behaviour as I know one of them suffers with PTSD like I do.
At some point around this time, I had developed a severe kidney infection which almost turned into sepsis and I had to get the ambulance out to me. I'm no stranger to ambulances as I also have them out frequently due to severe panic attacks which almost cause a seizure and a heart attack I'm some cases.
Strangely after this, despite telling me that they've never had an ambulance out to them, for anything small like an ache they would call 111 which they didn't know before I had told them. 111 in the UK is the none emergency line that can send out am ambulance if you need it. However in a lot of the cases M had, they were perfectly fine but would cry and sob on the phone and say they felt like dying. Of course they send out an ambulance to check on them but it would always be fine.
Worried as I was all the time, I neglected my studies to take care of them and I'd spend a lot on them since I felt the compulsive need to take care of them. They would also guilt trio me with the fact that they were both previously homeless in their childhoods so I needed to get them something in return. I ended up spending over 300 pounds a month on them.
I caught M out one though since the uni I go to, require the ambulances to inform the reception first for permission and to unlock all the doors for them. Before going up to M, I had to go to reception to ask if they would let me in. When I informed they why, they were confused and said that there were no ambulances that parked up at all, not even firefighters which sometimes arrive for medical aid occasionally.
Moving forward a lil I had started to grown attached to them more to the point where I thought I liked them. They expressed to me previously that they're poly and so am I. M had even stated to me that when they first met me they found me attractive and wanted to potentially have relationship.
One day I decided to just confess over text making it extremely clear to them that they had to think about it first so that we did not rush into things and make things worse. If they wanted to be friends then i would be ok with that and I made myself very clear 3 or 4 times within the text.
Instantly, because i was in the room next to them, they came in and told me that they loved me. They hugged me and cuddled me for a while until we went into M room. I was in G room at the time. Suddenly, they both got completely naked in front of me. I had told them that I'm ok with boxers and a shirt since they were more like shorts but getting naked? I was shocked but just went along with it. I was in a shirt and boxers until they told me that i should join them and take my top and bra off (we're all under the trans umbrella). They both persisted and feeling pressured I took my shirt and bra off and joined them in bed. Then G opens up a folder on their phone of their nudes together which I was in shock for. I knew they had it but tbh, I didn't really want to see it. They then expressed how our previous shopping trip to a sex store (we're adults and we go in there cause why not) was a test to see if I would take the hint they liked me. I'm autistic but even I could tell that that was a lie. There were never any discussions of that nature that took place that day.
They then went on about their sex life in full detail. I'm not particularly fond of the idea of personally having sex within the first few months of dating since I'm very frigid about that sort of thing. I'm not stranger to sled pleasure but anything like that is entirely different and I wanted my boundaries to be known then and there. There were a few touches here and there after that, all of which would explicitly done with consent as I have had encounters with SA previously. They knew this.
After that day, they all of a sudden stopped talking me completely. We were on uni break so it wasn't like I could talk to them in class about it either. I felt alone and like I had done something wrong. This sent me onto a pretty bad depressive episode which triggered a small psychotic episode to occur. During which they would constantly tell me when they did feel like talking to me that i was just like my dad (abuser) and that I was being annoying and paranoid about everything. I have since talked to me my mum about this since my memory is a little hazy from that time and she said that the only thing that could've given the episode away was my sudden belief in a god and afterlife. I'm an atheist and grew up that way. But G and M were mostly referring to the fact that on numerous occasions I had called them out on body shaming me, using me as fatspo to fuel their own anorexia and belittling language they would against me constantly. This was even present in class alot since some students who I'm now friends with even stated that they acted as if they ere higher than everyone. Anytime you didn't give them attention, they'd start going on about suicide or passing out only to wake up seconds later.
They also claim to have DID and that one of their alters had encephalitis. This wasn't just a symptom holder either. They would claim they all had it and even told paramedics who were caring for another patient who had broke their leg on campus at the time that they had it. Although after this, they came back pissed to the paramedics caught on pretty quickly that this was a lie.
Months of this built up a full mental breakdown and I had one of the most server panic attacks of my life. I had to be admitted onto A&E where u saw the mental health team to discuss as safety plan since I was have frequent bouts of this. I've always felt with hallucinations since I was 8 but never like I had on that day and to this day, the only thing I can fully remember is the feeling and vision I had. I would not wish it on my worst enemy.
G and M response to this? They went to my friend who was packing my bag at the time and told them that if they didn't pack it the right way I would hate them. They actually cold apparently and not once did they ask how I was. When I got home, I only saw one text saying "hey, Ik your in A&E but you can tell me in your own time what happend."
They were very much disinterested me and I began to be fed up with them. I had an upcoming concert with them not long after so I figured I'd keep the peace until them and they distance myself from them since I was clearly suffering from it all. Around this time, I had randomly been kicked out of the discord we had together with the people we met at con. I asked around they just gave one word responses. I had attempted to be friends with them before but annoyed by their sudden disinterest in me again, I just moved on.
Fast forward and I'm logging in on minecraft to a shared server we had. I used this server as a coping mechanism since it was literally the only thing that got me out of bed and moving to a degree some days. However everything I ahd built was gone. All my pent uo frustration just let itself out and I started crying down the phone over a voice message to G. I was a bit pissed but overly. Key thing note however is that I was having a go at them and in no way screaming at them which they later claimed I did. I even showed my mum and therapist and they were both in agreement that I was not shouting nor did I even raise my voice. It sounded more like I was upset than anything else.
G then said that they lost trust me because of this and that they wanted some distance for a while. I apologies profusely, even getting my mum to help me since I was I no way fit to text. However, a dumb mistake we made was sending the same apology over to the both of them, the only difference being their name. G then stated that because of the name, that they felt like I wasn't actually apologising and didn't wanna hear it. I tried to clear things up but the they told me that I had no excuse to act this way towards them since they were "such a good friend to me". After this, i went on call with a friend of mine who is my ex. However we ended on pretty good terms and are still close to this day. They even look after my cat for me.
I'm gonna call him J. J can be the over protective type so in response to my distress texted G ti find out more about why they were so cold about everything and in his mind, over reacted to something so insignificant like minecraft. This is where they made the claimed that I had screamed at them and I sent them into a PTSD attack. What J did notice though was that the story they gave was almost word for word of a panic attack in had explained to J about, almost like they copied it and changed a few things. They the proceeded to tell me that I was abusing them in that moment and that i was exactly like their dad (who's a pedo btw). Hurt by this and the fact that I had told J to NOT text G at all, I ended thinsg of stating my true feelings about everything and said that I never wanted to see them again. It felt good to get it off my chest and honestly freeing. The weeks after that were spent healing in therapy with my mum who both agreed that their actions in the past were more akin to.emotional bullying. Om still coming to terms with this I had trusted them with every fibre of my being. It felt like my heart was being ripped apart whoever, I stated talking to new people in my class around that time. Each of them said that they had notice the same behaviours towards me themselves and were honestly concerned for my safety since they would frequently talk shit about me behind my back. They then put on their snapchat story the next day that they were greatful for the friend they had and got rid of dead weight in their life. They also chalk up their sudden change to be apart of their BPD which if you have seen the eyes of someone who's manic, you'd know that it has a distinct look. The photos they took of themselves really disturbed me as you can clearly tell they're not right in the head at all. The eyes were dark and blown fully. Their eyes just looks black and soulless. I showed another friend who has BPD to confirm if it was what I was thinking and they agreed. It was unnerving and I honestly felt uncomfortable. I couldn't sleep well that night. They looked like they belonged in those headshots of convicts who had just been arrested and still are clearly under the influence. After this I also sent out a text containing context to everything to the group chat since I knew they were gonna manipulate things. I have seen them in person do it and it's honestly disturbing to see. Each one responded telling me that I was a liar and that I should feel ashamed of myself. One even told me they weren't gonna hear me out since they didn't know me well which I think is just a werid line of logic to have tbh. One even accused me of faking my disability which I quick proved to be false which silenced them. I've since blocked every single one of them since I don't wnat anything to do with them at all. I don't want them to know about my life and twist things again to hurt me. Forgive me if I'm over doing it but honestly, it was like I was talking to group of psychopaths who didn't care for anyone but themselves. Their past actions certainly proved that much.
Fast forward a week and I'm out shopping with friends all of a sudden, at even location we were at G was there. These were bookshops that were not well known the area and hidden very well so there would be no way G would know about them, especially since they don't like reading. G still followed one of my friends on snapchat and we found out by testing that every post we'd make, with or without the location attached, G would be right there moments later. Creeper out we ended the day for our own safety and went home.
Ever since all that, I have been taking to a friend of mine who G and M claimed abused them although with the evidence I have seen, it was the complete opposite. G was a regular drug user and would constantly use drugs as an excuse for their actions. My friend also suffered heavily with mental health problems and physical ailments that they need physio therapy for. G and M would constantly tell them they were faking and that they should stop acting like they were in pain. This is similar to an incident where they stated that I was not physically disabled cause they couldn't see it. Which is stupid honestly. By law, I am classed as disabled as to this day I struggle diary with ankle and knee problems due to a late development. I frequently use my braces but I don't use a cane since I'm too self conscious despite it being recommended to me by my doctors.
It hurt to see that they were treated this way and we bonded over shared experiences. There were also other people they had done this too.
Finally getting to the main issue, recently a con just took place which I had to cancel last minute since a family member died and I had to fly back over to my previous country to attend the funeral. The friend that G and M introduced to me started getting closer to them which I honestly didn't pay much mind to since I'm now just done with that shit. However, it wast until now that I feel uncomfortable. All of a sudden, this friend, ill call them O, had removed me from their private account for "safety reasons" and said they had done this to othe people. It didn't take long before I saw with my own eyes that it was just me. G and M have a nasty habit of spreading false rumours and if you know the cosplay community well, that shit spreads liek wildfire. It doesn't have that they have a sizable following compared to mine and know alot more people than I do. I honestly think they're tryna turn people against me and I don't know what to do at this point. I want them to leave me alone and keep my name out of things. I have had so many great days ever since we stopped being friends and my health has also improved dramatically. I'm not having as many panic attacks or severe ones either and I've not had a depressive episode like the ones before ever since.
I don't want to be dragged down like this and I wanted to defend myself however I know for a fact they have more influence then me so many people will side with them just like the group chat did. I don't know what to do anymore and I really don't want things to kick off again either. If I sense any drama starting at all I will just block people cause I'm just not having it. It's all child's play and they honestly need to fucking grow up and grow some balls or something. I just don't know what to do anymore. Thoughts?

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Karghol stepped forward. As Rob he might be scared, but he'd been the leader of the group for a long time, operating as our main tank across a ton of games, and now, I could see him taking that step again, "Okay, first thing's first. If they're gonna pop us out of this from the outside, then that's not on us, but we've all seen this anime. If they're not coming, then we need to get to the endgame as fast as possible."
"Nope," I shook my head, surprising even myself at how quickly I'd said something.
He turned, "What? I mean, we gotta get out ahead of this."
"In most games, I'd agree, but not here, not in this game. Also, side-point but decision time for everyone: Real names or character names? I can't keep flipping between them. Lugh is what's on my party registry, so I'm sticking with Lugh," It seemed small but wasn't.
I'd learned well enough that giving people all of the information was most often counter-productive at best. Giving people a small, immediate choice was far preferable and got them on the path to understanding better. Temur snorted slightly at the absurdity, "Well, I suppose you can call me either Temur, or Temur. Whichever floats your boat."
Several groans came out, and finally, some laughter. I mean, it was dad joke humor to be sure, but jokes were probably going to become a much more specific thing for us. From there, everyone chose their character names, either because it was simply easier given the nametags in our party rotation, or because they just didn't want everyone knowing their real ones. Khargol however, was a slight agitated, "Alright, so why not speedrun it?"
"Because speedrunners die and reset constantly."
The slight mirth died out in the room, but Khargol wasn't ready to yield the point, "I've watched you do a no-death run of Dark Souls!"
I nodded, "And do you have any idea how many times I died in that game getting to that level of skill? Look, this isn't Dark Souls. That game has set difficulty levels. Yeah, it's got solid AI, but here? The AI adapts to tactics, and I'm pretty sure the beta test players are about to learn that the hard way."
Everyone was a bit curious at the statement, but it was Shelara who spoke up, "What does that 'adaptive AI' mean?"
I sighed, and took a seat at the head of the table, with Khargol finally sitting down next to me, "It means the AI of the system is learning. Beta testers essentially get to play ahead of the general public to try and stress test the system under actual play conditions. Most usually, they'll try to learn as many exploits as possible, so even if they start out on brand new characters, they're still going to be far ahead of the pack, getting gear and coin ahead of others. Assume that the beta testers have watched things like SAO or other 'trapped in a video game' style series, and they're doing the same as Khargol is suggesting. Problem is, that's exactly what a bunch of them already did, and if the AI works like it's supposed to, then it's ready for them.
"For Valorian Saga, one of the biggest selling points was its adaptive AI system, a system that learns. What that means is that the system behind bosses has already learned those exploits from beta testers and has some sort of answer for them, and they're going to run dead into them."
Chrysta sat forward, leaning her elbows on the table, at least in part to show off her biceps, "Well if a speedrun is out of the question, then what do we do instead?"
Shelara cut back in, "But... shouldn't we try and go save the beta testers?"
I considered, "Shelara, in answer to your question, we can't. Even assuming we could catch up to wherever they're at, there's almost no chance they'd listen to us if we did. They're just as likely to assume we're rivals, or to think we're idiots, but regardless they won't be following our instructions just because we say so. As far as they're concerned, they already know this game, and we're a bunch of sprouts who are panicking. Even if we could get past that point, we don't know the game like they do, and we're more likely to end up needing saving before we ever get to them.
"As to the other question, Chrysta, what we do now is finish up the starter quests, then we use our flyers to join the militia."
Every MMO veteran groaned openly. Arkadi especially was annoyed at the concept, "Come on, man, faction-grinding on day two? We're not even out of the gate yet!"
I'd expected this, and checked my in-game clock, and swore under my breath. We needed to get moving, with only roughly eighteen minutes of daylight left, "Guys, that's why we need to join the militia. It's safe, and grinding up our faction rep with Valoria opens a lot of doors, not least of which is giving us barracks space to live in free of charge, basic equipment upgrades, and getting coin. That's just the short-term gains. Yeah, not much, but it gives us a foundation. We get the lay of the land, and we build up our strategies. There's another reason though, and it's important."
Khargol nodded, "As militia, we get arrest powers in line with the laws of Farrelston."
"Wait, we'd be cops?" Shelera seemed slightly hyped about the concept.
I nodded, "More or less. We aren't out in the main room right now cause everyone's losing their minds out there. They're all coming to terms with the idea that this place is where they might die, and that breeds desperate reactions. Fourteen million players split between fifty servers, giving an average server population of... two-hundred-eighty thousand per server give or take for server popularity. Assume maybe one percent of that go fully around the bend and get violent, and that gives us two thousand eight hundred violent criminals that just hit the city on this server that have the ability to level up within the system.
"Farrelston has to be a safe space for players to return to, but that can't happen if there isn't order, and that means law enforcement."
One of our newcomers made her presence felt, the elf woman from the cathedral, shaking as she spoke, "I'm Layala. What about my brother?"
Tom... "I don't know. I don't what happens to those who die in the game. Maybe they wake up, maybe they're just comatose in a hospital somewhere, or maybe they're gone."
I let it sink in for everyone. Layala's eyes fell to the table as she slowly wept. I hate this, but sugarcoating the thing wasn't good for anyone, "All I can work on right now is keeping us all alive. This is a fantasy RPG, so for all I know, there might be another way to get them back, but I don't want to get anyone's hopes up. Anyone who knows someone who didn't respawn, we'll keep a journal of names, to see that they're remembered. We chronicle the dead, and if the opportunity to get them back presents itself, we go all-in on it.
"I know we all have questions... but we can't stay here to answer them all, and I don't have all the answers for you. We need to start moving, and moving now. We've got thirteen people here, our five and the eight we added on. We've got enough people to form a guild when the time comes, so we should start acting like a guild now."
Layala's voice cracked, "I-I nominate Lugh."
I was startled. I've been very game-knowledgeable, but I wasn't the leader type. It was never my role in the group.
"I second the nomination."
Khargol. My head whipped around, "Look, guys, I'm not a leader. I know stuff, that's what I've got. Khargol's the one who leads."
Khargol shook his head, "Not here, not in this game. I'm all good for the tanking, but you're the only one of us who's putting out a plan of attack, and I'm getting more lost by the minute. It sucks dude, and it hurts to admit it to myself, but you're the guy this time."
Nods occurred, and by show of hands, I was almost unanimously elected to command the 'guild', minus my own dissenting vote. Well.... crapbaskets, "Alright, fine. I won't argue it, but we've gotta get a move on. Get the starter quests going, and when we unlock the job change system, we'll work things out from there. Until then, we'll break into three parties, two four-man parties, and one five-man. Khargol, you're in charge of the five-man, Temur and myself are the other party leaders for now. We'll meet at the barracks come sundown. We spread out the neos amongst the three parties so they're all protected, and we get started. Don't do any combat quests alone."
I picked up Shelera for my party's neo, along with Chrysta and Layala, and the parties agreed to meet up in front of the barracks around sunset so we could join up together. We fought the press of bodies in the tavern to get out into the streets, and headed off for our quests. I could feel my heart racing a bit, the whole thing feeling like some sort of bad dream, but we would need a minute to get things together, "Okay, let's check everyone's quest logs. Any shareable quests, share them with the group so we can all help out and get rewards. We tackle them from lowest to highest."
We moved through the streets to the first quest, running messages around the city for the heralds. The quest was designed to get new players oriented with the larger city of Farrelston and what factions existed within it. The vast majority of players though, were barely moving, either pressed into the tavern or milling about in front of the cathedral. This was a huge problem, and we were finding clusters of people around, hiding and trying to just deal with the enormity of it all. We were running messages to guards, merchants, and nobles on what was a very low-key questline while watching people crying or raging. Shelera moved up next to me, close to tears herself, "We can't do anything?"
a I halted, and looked around again, and noticed some people who weren't in groups. Solo players who had come in by themselves, the same as you'd see in any MMO, and now they were cut off from the world, friends, family, and no party. Solo players really only existed in MMOs, people who would just fill in the gaps, and otherwise keep to themselves, and it worked in the world of video games. In the real world, though, it wasn't good, "We can do a little."
I jogged over to where a powerfully built Dracon with a sword and shield was balled up on the ground, weeping, purple-scaled head buried in his arms. I knelt down next to him, laying a hand on his shoulder, "Hey, what's your character name?"
The Dracon boy looked up imploringly, his voice quavering, "Umbaar..."
"Hi, Umbaar. I'm Lugh, and these are my friends. Why don't you come with us? You can join our party," I kept my tone even by pleasant.
He nodded sheepishly and accepted the party invite, "My mom's gonna kill me. I wasn't even supposed to be playing the game."
Oh God, no, "How old are you, Umbaar?"
"I'll be fourteen in December."
Due to the nature of the game, the minimum age for Valorian Saga was eighteen. He'd likely gotten access to the rig, and just jumped on, and now he was trapped, "I'm sure right now, your mom's just worried about you, but we'll keep you safe. Come on, we've got quests to do."
The absurdity of our questing was fully growing with each step we took. After running messages, we helped the watch with investigating some local crimes to learn the search system, worked with merchants on trading to get the economy down, and along the way, we found some more solos to fill us out to the party cap of eight. The jobs were immaterial to me, but Shelera and Layala both found comfort in picking up more people, with the latter taking over care of Umbaar. NPCs went about their day's work, and I started to catch on to something, "Hey... is this day... running long to anyone else?"
Games don't use full twenty-four-hour days, using a shorter day and night cycle to give the impression of a world without having to artificially inflate the game to make it feel like a full day. Valorian Saga had, in the videos, been shown to have a twenty-minute day, and twenty-minute night, but as we ran around, it had been far more than twenty minutes now. The sun had barely moved in the sky, which given the rest of the game's level of detail wasn't something they would've ignored. Chrysta spoke up after counting her clock, "Uh... well dearheart, I do believe we've got us a twenty-four cycle now."
There were several possibilities to this, perhaps either our minds changed gear to work with in-game time, or the game had altered to have twenty-four-hour time. Either way, we had no answers for it. I was getting a bit sick of having more and more questions I couldn't answer, but I couldn't focus on it in the here and now. I called a halt, and we found a small corner tavern to get food and drink. I took some time with the menu system, and up popped the character status window.
By statistics, we were moving up a bit, but the main stats of our jobs weren't changing very much at all. My basic stats for movement had risen, but not by much, and the gain was tapering off. That was probably from all the walking around the city we were doing. Reputations were going up in the city guilds attached to our quests, but again, they were minor improvements, and the effective XP was tapering off from doing them. I took out my character journal, a system conceit by the devs that the game world was simply too grand in scale to not allow a lot of notetaking, and did stat-math just like when I would spreadsheet my builds at home. From what I could see, the game had no true 'leveling' system. Instead, skills and attributes were built up by how you played, sort of like in Skyrim, but the same actions would not keep getting you the same degree of XP. A common enough point, or else someone could pull a South Park and just merc wolves until they hit the cap. Abilities would unlock as your stats rose, some coming online automatically like Sprint, while others you had to find a trainer for, such as the Double Knock ability for archers. From what I'd seen online, the abilities would unlock advanced jobs, and certain combinations would unlock hybrid jobs, so a Paladin would be a combination of a knight and acolyte. None of the testers had gotten that far, however, they'd just seen the possibility of it.
I noticed Shelera leaning over to look at my journal, and I smiled, "Just doing nerd stuff, plotting my progression to figure out what jobs I need."
She smiled back, "That seems weirdly normal. What are you thinking of doing?"
"Well, for now, I need to move up my abilities as a Hunter, right? Hunter eventually leads to a few choices, so I'm thinking I'll probably go for a Ranger build. That means I can train up Yndress here as a battle companion."
Yndress had been flying about with me, and sometimes resting on my shoulder, and now, she was curled up by my arm on the table as I continued. Shelera reached over and petted Yndress, "That is so cool. She's so warm. I totally should've figured out a way to get the limited edition... so what should I be leveling up?"
"Well, you're a vagabond, so you might look at something like Bounty Hunter since we're working with the militia. Combine that with another job.... huh."
"What?"
Daeva grinned, "Oh, sweetie, he just worked somethin' out. What do you need, Lugh?"
"Give me a minute. I need to go to the scrivener," I shot up and stepped out of the tavern.
It wasn't far to the scrivener where I could buy the supplies I needed. We'd just done an ink delivery there, and now, I would need paper and ink to work with. Returning, I cleared off the tavern table and laid out a large scroll used for maps, currently unmarked, "Okay, I need everyone to bring up your character pages and stand where I can read them."
Gamers generally do have a sense of when someone's worked out an exploit, and this was one of those times. They brought up their screens so I could start marking down abilities, attributes, and skills. Of note, my Scibing ability was ticking slowly upward as I laid things out. Scribing could turn into runic writing and other more arcane and mundane pursuits. What I was working on became a skill tree system, with the various jobs being grouped together. I had to move things around, and in real life I wouldn't be able to do that with ink, but in the game sense, it was pretty simple. I kept moving around my drawing, finally starting to come into a workable initial system of abilities, jobs, and other things that built off of one another. It look a bit mad, like if no one had stopped the devs on Path of Exile's skill tree, but it was there, "We're thinking about this wrong. We need to get to the barracks. I don't want to explain this twice."
Banded back up, I stopped by our newest unlock: Carriage Stations. The city was entirely too big to be running around it all the time, and for just half a silver, we could go to any other ward in the city. I signaled the coachman, handing him my flyer, "Take us to the militia barracks."
The coachman nodded sharply, "Right you are, sir."
The coaches held four, so we split between the two, and I rechecked my numbers. I was pretty certain I was right by the math, but these things didn't always pan out like you wanted, so it was best to recheck. It still seemed to be working out like I thought, but I needed Temur for a blind study of it. We got out at the barracks, a building made up of fortified walls and barred windows with internal shutters. Militiamen NPCs were standing guard out front, while we could just see some working in the training yard to the side. From what I could see, however, we were the only players here.
Temur's party arrived first, and apparently, I wasn't the only one picking up strays as two carriages emptied of people. He was running a full party as well now, and grinning in his uniquely Temur way, even if he did have draconic features now, "So, I see we're all taking in the lost little lambs?"
"I mean, sure, why not? That's how we met, so why not do it here, too?"
He nodded, "Questing went well, if a bit hum-drum, but you have a look in your eyes that says you've worked something out. You got math time!"
I nodded, "Waiting for... yeah, Khargol went off-road, I see."
Temur and I had shown up with two carriages each, only for Khargol to pull up with four, all packed. That put our new numbers at thirty-two players as he practically bounced up to us, "What?!"
We both shook our heads, "Nothing, man. Never change. I've got some news for everyone."
The full mass moved over to the side of the building so we weren't obstructing the entrance, "Party people, I worked something out at lunch."
I rolled out my map of the skills tree, "Okay, so I was going over my character screen, and did some math. I know what we need to do: We need to move up on every job."
Khargol shook his head, "Isn't that gonna leave us as jacks of all trades? We'd be running pretty average."
I gestured with my hands a bit in dismissal, "Usually, you're right, but here, it's different. The stats aren't really separated here, they're intended for cross-classing, and it's not just the combat jobs. I moved up a bit at Scribing here, and it looks like it'll be the same for crafting and gathering jobs. Move up in X, Y, and/or Z jobs and you unlock a hybrid. So like, say you move up as a blacksmith, armorer, and weaponsmith. All three have abilities building into one another, and that can unlock further abilities, other jobs, a whole classification of things we can't see yet.
"Using abilities works up the stats associated with that ability, and the higher the ability, the more XP it generates for the stats. Those stats still stay there when you do a job change, so you could be a Gladiator working up strength by working the forge."
Shelera looked over the drawing, "Okay, so you think if we take every job up, then that'll make us a lot stronger? But won't we end up with a bunch of usless stats?"
I shook my head, "No, for two primary reasons. For one, what if instead of Paladin, you went something like a Hexblade in D&D terms? Or, Shelera, you take Bounty Hunter, then build up your hunter job to Scout, and you have something akin to a Justicar class? Or Khargol, what if you master every weapon group?"
Temur's interest was peaked at mention of Hexblade, "And what is the second reason?"
I sucked in a breath, "It's a job change system. There's a job change skill, and every basic skill I've seen has upgrades, even if I can't see the end of the trees yet. The adaptive AI is going to adapt to our individual tactics, but even if all of us were playing hunters, we'd all approach hunting differently, maybe more reliant on archery, or snares, or pets. It would force the AI to keep readapting its own tactics on the fly. If we build up, we might just be able to get to something better than the sum of our parts."
Karghol nodded, "And that makes it doubly important we get going on the militia stuff. Shall we?"
The lot of us went over to the barracks, where a guard greeted us at the door, "Hold, citizens. What is your business with the thirteenth Valorian militia?"
I stepped forward, "We're here to enlist for service."
The guard perked right up, "Ah, good. Greetings and well met! I am Sergeant-at-Arms Brant. We are in need of stalwart folk to help protect Farrelston and wider Valoria in these trying times. Dark things are afoot both at home and afar, and it speaks well of you that you would choose service. Please, enter the hall, and register yourselves with Yeoman Granger. Welcome once again, may the purple dragon fly eternal!"
Prev Royal Road Patreon

I know the title is ridiculous, but I'll explain. A week ago my wife "Sara" and I got married. It was a huge wedding, something I didn't love the idea of but stomached for her. She's Catholic so the typical big wedding was all but a requirement for her and her family. That's okay, I genuinely was at peace with it but it put me on edge. Every time I've been to their family events (Christmas, birthdays, football Sundays), I've always got the impression that her father and two uncles didn't like me too much. But a year and a half of dating down, and I proposed because I love Sara and we work on most levels, even if family gatherings can be awkward here and there. This is all to say, I was very nervous to get married in front of a group of about 100-ish people.
Some important context: I struggle with anxiety and, by extension, intrusive thoughts. My favorite movie since I was a kid is Borat - it's admittedly very stupid but it never fails to make me laugh when I'm having a bad day, even now at 30 years old. I know, dumb. But whenever I'm anxious, my intrusive thoughts range from dark to outrageous. You can probably see where this is going.
As the ceremony was approaching the end, I knew the kiss was coming and I was sweating. I'm in front of dozens of people, many of which don't seem to like me to begin with, and I was anxious out of my mind. It was unfortunate because I loved the idea of getting married, just not 'under the microscope'. We kissed, and I felt such a sense of relief to be done (as awful as that sounds). Here's where it gets ugly and god do I wish I was making this up: when we pulled away from the kiss, I was so nervous and relieved that I blurted out a "MY WIFE" in full exaggerated accent and all in front of everyone. Sara explicitly forbade me from doing anything "silly" like smashing her face into cake. I respect that, I get how important this was to her and how much effort went into making her look perfect for our big day. What she didn't expect (and me too, if I'm being honest), was me blurting out a stupid as fuck movie quote in front of everyone.
Now I want to say, the organ had began playing and by that time it wasn't silent in the church. But still, my outburst was fairly loud. Her younger brother audibly laughed at what I had done. She immediately went beet red, and averted her eyes from me. I have never been so mortified in my entire life, and I wanted to cease existing right there on the spot. Luckily only the front row or two seemed to have heard me, and everyone else looked unphased, probably just thinking I was excited. Really, I don't think people thought anything of it save a few people. But that didn't matter. From the moment we left the Church, I could tell I had royally fucked up. Sara wasn't holding eye contact with me, and our chemistry was clearly off all night. She was livid.
To make a long story short, afterwards when we were alone, I immediately tried to explain myself. But here's the thing:
a.) Between the two of us I'm a jokester. I regularly say ridiculous things to make her laugh, and enjoy being silly around her.
b.) She knows I go to therapy and that I struggle with anxiety, but I've never told her about my intrusive thoughts. It's embarrassing have to explain to someone that I have a never-ending tornado of dark thoughts and movie quotes and whatever the hell else swirling around in my head when I'm anxious. It's been this way since I was a teenager.
I told her that it was a nervous reaction, I pleaded with her and told her about my intrusive thoughts (which itself was embarrassing to admit), but she sincerely doesn't believe me because I'm always saying ridiculous shit. She was in tears and fuming, and I started to cry too. She said I had "embarrassed her in front of her parents and grandparents" on the day she's dreamed about her entire life, when she had explicitly asked me to not do anything dumb on this "one day." We talked in circles for an hour, she thinks I'm just making up an excuse and I got so desperate that I begged her to she speak with my therapist. She said she would "think about it" but that if I'm lying that she "doesn't want to be married" to someone that can't respect an important boundary that she set. That night, she slept in the guest room and it's been horrible since. We have time off work for our honeymoon coming up, but every day she leaves the house for most of the day. I'm assuming that she's spending days with her friends.
I don't see my therapist but every two weeks, so I still have about 3 days until my next appointment. I emailed him earlier today, but he hasn't responded yet. I don't even know if a therapist will humor a situation like this. But now I'm worried that I'll never be able to look at her the same way for even threatening to end our relationship like that.
I know this is all so fucking stupid. I sincerely didn't mean for this to happen.
I left out some details because I'm kind of in a haze, but what do I do here? Is this salvageable? Are we just worked up from an emotional day? I really don't want to lose her over something so ridiculous, but I don't even know what to think anymore.

I've got everything it takes to be a good friend. Kind ear and shoulder to cry on, an easy going person that gets along with most people well enough, and a sense of humor so hilarious that my cat has not once complained about my jokes!
A few things that I like:

• Music - Stuff that could fall under the punk umbrella for the most part
• Movies - mostly horror, and comedy
• Pets - feel free to spam me with pictures of your pets, tell me about what their original name was and what the evolution to their current nick name was, talk about their personality quirks, etc

As you can see by now, we'd probably get along swell. So if you'd be interested in getting to know one another, talking about the days, sharing memes and pet pictures, bullshitting or something, shoot me a message.

I’ve never, ever, in my whole life, high school crushed so hard on a person that all I can see is him and only him in my future. I also realize I’m a romantic who reads a lot into things and is a class act over-thinker. My idiotic lady lizard brain attached to a single moment that changed our dynamic in my head, and I’m frustrated with myself because… I shouldn’t have a crush on him. Like, really, I should not be pining after him, but I am, and I’m at this point in life where I’m okay not dating anyone because I highly doubt I’d ever feel with anyone else how I feel when he looks at me. His eyes are ingrained into my memory; each little moment between us, as tiny as they are, simmers in my mind and sweetly torments me in my dreams as we hold each other and talk about everything. I need genuine human contact/connection, obviously. I can’t explain it, but god, can I feel it; things become slow, and nothing else exists. It took one hug. I excitedly threw my arms around his neck for him being home, and he wrapped his arms around my waist. And with my chest pressed against his, I felt it; I felt my brain and my heart ping something just as the butterflies took flight, and it took forever for me to realize I messed up and fell a little into feelings with him. Which I am sure is one-sided. It’s going on a year and a half of being in “crush” with him, and it’s so incredibly stupid of me, but I can’t get these little moments out of my head; he lives there rent-free.

• His warm smile and sparkling eyes from between airplane seats as I get excited over flying.
  
• Him quietly teasing me over little things like how I basically live at their house or if I’m acting like a dork, but it’s just between us.
  
• A rather peculiar look he gave me as we were digging a giant hole in the sand so we could help bury his brother and a friend in it.
  
• Him offering me a single cheese curd by holding one out to me via the old finger pinch.
  
• He knows the little things I like and will point them out, like, “They have cappuccino ice cream.” Or, “You like ____, you’ll like this show.” Which isn’t such a big thing, but for me, it means a lot…
  

From that moment a year and a half ago, that spark between us caused such a shift in me that I’m simply just excited to feel alive again. He saw me. I felt like I met my person, a friend. Like his heart pressed against mine in such an innocent way that it jumpstarted something sleeping inside me, and I’ve been going ever since. I’m working on myself; I’m back in college classes for creative writing, paying off debt, writing almost weekly, making long-term goals, and questioning why I was okay being locked in a cage for so long while someone else held the key. I’m hardcore into therapy, self-help, and traveling on my own. He showed me what it was like to feel safe in someone’s presence. Since then, I have only been moving towards a new reality, one that I’ve been working toward my whole life until someone told me to stop, and it was he who made me realize my potential was being wasted by staying stagnant and that I must continue forward. It was just by him showing me kindness no one had shown me before that I realized I was being abused and being held back from my dreams.
At times, I don’t know if the spark was attraction, an awakening of sorts, or both. Still, I find myself stuck in the middle of both a nightmare and a dream, but I know I’d still be stuck if it wasn’t for him waking me up in the most beautiful of ways and opening my world back up to the technicolor universe I used to play in. I’ve never openly admitted to this crush, but I felt like it was time to let it out so I could breathe: I love him for showing me acceptance, for allowing me my dark humor, and, in turn, for sharing his own. I’m secretly weaving our innocent story into a rom-com, and I’m writing so there will be something of us on some plane of existence. Because I doubt I’ll ever tell him I had such a big crush on him, even though I desperately want to. I want there to be something written to tell him I appreciate him for what he’s secretly helped me accomplish and that I see his soul so clearly, like it were my own. He helped me fall back in love with myself, and I will always love him for this small act of beautiful kindness.

any hinny fics that are really sweet, cute and sweet among them? It can be 1 chapter, one shot. that they are planning the wedding. I don't know, anything cute and romantic

Hey reddit! I'm a 38 year old latin guy from Washington DC. Honesty is the best policy so I'll make it known now that I'm not looking for platonic friends, I'm looking for a romantic partner. Buckle up, because I'm about to unveil why I may or may not be the right partner for you in a classic listicle style that all you youngin's love.
About Me:
^{You'll never believe number 6!}

1. I'm a bit of a stoner. It's true, your boy loves himself some marijuana. (In fact, I did a 25mg edible earlier) I endeavor to never let it take over my life, but it aids a lot in #2 on this list. I'm also not a stranger to the very occasional mushroom trip.
2. I'm a true creative. Left to my own devices in an empty room, I would constantly create new things. Whether that be drawing, writings, photography, music or stoner ideas. It's my true nature to be a creative and to stifle that part of myself makes me pretty sad. Fortunately, I get to create on a daily basis. which brings me to..
3. I have the kindest heart. I see life through rose colored glasses, some may say. I just believe in the good in people. I think most people are good and those that are bad are redeemable. Whether someone is ultra religious, a different political affiliation, good, bad, ugly, whatever...I believe in getting to know them for myself and making my own decision of them. As a friend I always stick by my friends, no matter what. Friends in my life are friends for life, even if we lose touch. There is a downside to all this...it's that sometimes people take advantage of me. I don't care. When confronted with the choice to be loving or to be cruel or apathetic, I will always choose loving.
4. I make people laugh. Comedy and jokes have always been a part of me. Maybe it's the fact that I'm a middle child and craved attention or the fact that I grew up in a city where I had to be quick on my feet, but I love to make people laugh. This is best done in person but there can be humor over the internet too. :)
5. I don't take myself too seriously. I'm a talented person in my field and it's important for me to let go of my ego. There isn't a single person that I can't learn from and at my best I'm always open to listen to people's opinions of me or my creative work.
6. I see beauty in everyone, including you. If you hadn't guessed by now, I'm a photographer. I'm into portraits and I value my connection with people one-on-one and I think that's what makes me a talented portrait photographer. I often hear people talk about the things they hate about themselves but try to reflect to them their true beauty. The beauty that was always there and that they need to be reconnected to.
7. I'm culturally Latino. My parents are from El Salvador, but I was born and raised in DC. I have the experience of being born into a family of immigrants and understand the duality of living in two different worlds. While Spanish was my first language, it is not what I consider to be my native tongue. While I understand all Spanish, all my Spanish is food related.
8. I've done the self work. It's true. I'm not a man that punches walls, gets drunk and cries, will cheat on you, lie to you or a myriad of other things that toxic people do. I am not without faults, of course, but I have worked my demons out for the most part. I'm very self-aware and open to criticism and change.
9. I'm honest 99.5% of the time. Anyone professing to be honest 100% of the time is a liar. Ask me directly and I'll tell you my last big lie.
10. I know where I want to be in life. I'm close to getting there too. I've been at it for 13 years now and I feel that success is imminent. Will you be a part of it?

So what are you waiting for? Dust off that old keyboard, pound away at a few keys, and get ready to embark on an unforgettable adventure brought to you by (as they said in my day) the world wide web.
P.S - I'm 6'2. I should've started with that.

ISO humorous, smart, well-written, non-tragic literary fiction with a piney romantic conflict and a journey of self discovery like Less. But with female identifying or nb main characters.
Alternative, smthg like Farrell Covington and the Limits of Style but with non-cis-male main characters...funny and piney, well-written and spanning a long relationship, but with great character development so it isn't only romance.
I like genre lit too but that isn't what I'm looking here.
Kinda bummed about how few joyful lgbtq literary fiction books i am finding that are about f or nb main characters. Thinking the issue is that I don't know what to look for.

This likely going to sound very high school drama despite the fact we are all in our early 20s, it certainly feels that way to me. I just figured I should check my actions with a 3rd party in some way.
I am a trans enby/masc person that has never really been in a relationship despite being 22. I've known my best friend (enby, 23) for nearly a decade, and they've told me a lot about their relationships while in them, and their plans for the future, and I've always been supportive of them, without prying or teasing much (I don't remember ever fully teasing honestly, but maybe I did- though it certainly would have been within their boundaries). The person I'm seeing is almost 21 if that matters, and I've known her less than a year.
For some background information (because I feel it's important) I had a crush on her, learned she was a lesbian and figured she would not be interested in me (masc) and went "alright, don't ruin the friendship" and completely set my feelings to the side because aside from really liking her romantically, I thought she was a fabulous person. I told my friend about this after I attempted to put my feelings away. There were several times when my friend tried convincing me I still liked her, where they honestly really started to annoy me, as I cannot stand when someone else insists on how I feel. Plus at the time I figured no matter how I felt, it wasn't worth investing time in because it wouldn't be reciprocated, and I worried about making her uncomfortable by not getting over feelings she obviously wouldn't reciprocate.
I found out she liked me the day after we all went to a party hosted by a mutual friend (that knew she liked me, and "hinted" to me about it at the party), which surprised me (obviously) and took me a while to wrap my head around. I was excited and terrified, and when I tried to reach out to my friend the next day telling them I wanted to talk about it (in person) they just said "I know she likes you. It was obvious." But it felt more condescending. They then called me, put me on speaker with their dad, where they basically said "Yeah it was obvious. You're autistic" and their dad just started joking about how I need to accept this and I'll learn how to charm the ladies (no hate on him, he's cool, just thrown into a situation that he honestly lacked a lot of context for).
I've never been in a real relationship. Never any childhood relationships, middle school, or highschool relationships. (I had a brief, Maybe 2 month long online thing with one guy but I broke it off because I wasn't ready for anything, and was just really mentally unwell at the time. It was all online and I never felt connected to him. I also went on 1 date with someone before that but we agreed to just be friends and they moved out of state. All before I ever met her). I was very obviously freaking out about it. I was asking how it was obvious because I was trying to see what I missed. And I just get "Oh it was obvious. You were flirting with her" (I wasn't. I was too scared to flirt, and I insist there must be some intention to flirt. This has been a reoccurring argument as according to them, anything they want, like literally just talking about games we both like, is flirting. The fighting part of the game more than anything else. And I honestly never got an example of HER flirting. Just me.). They mentioned how she was trying to squeeze my friend out of the conversation and I fully said I didn't notice and should have so my friend didn't feel neglected. I mention this to prove I'm not stubbornly disagreeing and can recognize when I do bad.
Every time I had tried to talk to my friend about my thoughts and feelings, my shock fear and excitement about the situation they would do this stupid fucking "ooo" with a stupid face, make me uncomfortable, and I would immediately tell them I regret saying anything (because I very much did, as they were psyching me out and making me scared to make a move). The worst of it is when another friends event was coming up, and I mentioned I invited her, and after then entire "ooo" "I regret this conversation" happened, they quickly asked if she was going to be the plus one at my friend's wedding and I immediately tried to shut it down. My friends wedding is in September and there are several reasons why I wasn't even planning on having a plus one, excluding the fact we weren't even officially dating yet. The conversation was moving too fast, the momentum of asking her to this wedding months away from the first event that we hadn't even gone to was too much and they wouldn't drop it then despite me honestly being an ass. When it was brought up at the event with a direct question of her being someones plus one (mine or a mutual friends), it caused me to blue screen before she was invited as the other friends plus one. I am happy to have her at the wedding! But I felt it was sprung on me. Not her fault. I don't entirely blame my friend. I mostly feel bad that I blue screened.
She finally asked me out on a date. I was planning on asking her out- working myself up to it- but she beat me to it, and I'm honestly grateful for that. Ignoring several other things many of our friends have done (before this and up to now) it's been great!! I really like her, and she's an amazing person to hang out with. We went to a concert together and despite it being one of my favorite bands since before I knew her, half the time I was staring at her standing in front of me. I just really wanted to hold her hands, hold her, and I really wanted to kiss her then and there. Not counting the event before, this was kind of our third date (not sure if it entirely counts, we never called it that and we went with her brother and her brother's girlfriend). I asked to kiss her cheek after, when we were alone, because I couldn't work up the nerves to ask to just kiss her (I've never had a first kiss either).
I didn't tell my best friend about either of our dates, until after the second date (because I figured it was obvious that I had just gotten back from a date, and I might as well get over sharing it with them, and them being dramatic). They told me I "should have told me about this. We're best friend we're supposed to share this" but it was a family party at my place so the conversation dropped quickly. I have not told them about the concert. They know I went, they likely could figure out I went with her, but I haven't said we went to the concert together.
I'm now in this really weird situation where I want to talk about my relationship with my best friend because I really like her. I like her so much and I want advice because I'm nervous and I just want to talk about her. My stomach feels fluttery when I think about her and she's so amazing, and I want to talk about how lucky I am. But thinking about sharing with any of our friends makes me uncomfortable, including my best friend who I always thought I'd talk to about my relationships. They make me feel like I'm just a doll they can push together with another doll. Like I'm an actor in a show. They make me feel not real. I don't hide that they make me uncomfortable when they behave like they do. I've told other friends (friends only I have, outside of this group) about her a bit because I'm excited and also asking for advice sometimes, but it's harder because I don't see them as often and we aren't as close as I am with my best friend. I'm worried not talking to my friend about this will hurt them, but at the same time I genuinely feel distressed sometimes talking to them, and I think I deserve to avoid that feeling. Just writing this post makes me feel bad because I feel I focus so much on my frustration with friends rather than my joy with her, and that's all I honestly want to focus on.
Ultimately, AITAH for not talking to my best friend about my first relationship?

I'm good dude. I poured my heart and soul out. I wanted to actually write those sweet romantic letters to you as well. Thinking I could get you out of my system. I can't. You're forever embedded in me. In a good way. You thought I never cared? Well I proved you wrong. You thought I hated you too? Wrong again. I never did. I always knew there was something more... I found the answers and the why.
It's always been you. I was thinking about one of my favorite poems as a kid... You know... The raisin one... What happens to a dream deferred? I think through this journey I ended up experiencing all those deferments.
I don't know where to place you in my life anymore bc you're not actually in it. I always struggle with leaving something open ended. And it's cutting ✂️ into every area of my life. At the same time I really experienced first hand what you went through. All of it. I had to.
So now I understand and know I can't tuck you away. I don't have any availability or space that can contain your essence. I don't know what slot you fill bc you were an interesting ONE. Like a unique specimen or rock you collect that you can't quite classify or combine with another set. No.. you take up so much of every part of me. And maybe that's it. You're just so damn unique. So it almost becomes cumbersome you know. To archive you or file you away. Even so, there's not a system I've come up with pertaining to you. Not in the sense of like a system... You get what I mean. Almost like I have to create something more, just for you. Just bc you touched every part of my soul's essence. So I mean where do I put you when no one else has achieved this type of classification. It's quite humorous. It's enjoyable at times when I think about you.
I guess I'll just let you run amok and free... I mean what else can you do? Everyone seems to know where to go... You're not one to be constrained or constricted. Your soul spoke to mine and I let you take all of me. Like that saying you know... It made me think of how I truly understand the saying I am yours... There's no other way around it. Once I gave myself over to you it's impossible to change it. There's no manual or self help book I can read where you can change the settings... Change my feelings. I can turn the volume down, but sometimes you'll even override that.
We all strive to find the ONE who gets us to that space. Thank you for that. Even though we're not together. I'm was thinking how sad before. It's not an obsession though... It's different. So I won't stop you anymore. I won't try and turn the volume down. I gave myself away to you long ago.
So run through me...
Run freely...
Immerse yourself in me...
I surrender... I am yours...

I (31M) am stupidly in love with one of my best friends (24F) and it just really sucks.
Off the bat, I know the age difference seems a bit weird and I'll admit, there are times when we don't see eye to eye because of that but I truly don't believe it affects how I feel about her.
We started working together about a year ago and right from the start, she was a very bubbly and energetic person. I, on the other hand, am very introverted and tend to keep to myself. It was almost as if we were two polar opposites who had to coexist because we were work partners. There was never any animosity between us, she's a very sweet person and I kept things polite and professional, but she definitely wasn't someone I thought would become a friend or anything.
But over the course of working together, we began to know each other more and get closer and eventually become friends. She would share every detail of her life with me, sometimes too much lol, and I would share things with her. Again, being very introverted and solitary, I didn't share nearly as much but I shared more than I normally would with someone I haven't known for that long. She would tell me about her family life, her other friends, her relationships, her hobbies; everything. And within just a few months, we became very close and important to each other, joking that we were the brothesister neither of us asked for.
Over the time we worked together, a lot of drivers (we work in transportation) made comments about us such as "when's the wedding" and "where's your wife" whenever she wasn't in the office. We both joked it off as she was dating around and I am as emotionally unstable as they come.
Anytime those jokes were made, my brain immediately discounted any possibility that not only her but anyone would marry me as I'm simply not worthy of love. To this day, I still feel that I will die alone simply because no one would or should waste their time and emotions on me. I'm insignificant in the romantic world and while I know people like my parents and close friends do care about me, that love isn't the same or doesn't feel the same to me.
There came a time when I realized I cared about her more than I should, getting angry when one of her dates mistreated her or genuinely being happy whenever I could make her laugh or smile. And once I became conscious of that and acknowledged my feelings, I realized I loved her. I tried to rationalize it; chalking up the feelings to that of an older brother caring about his younger sister or simply a close friend but it was just much more than that. I was completely in love with her. Or at least, that's what I think happened as I may not know exactly what being in love feels like.
I told her how I felt while we were working one night, not the best time obviously but hindsight and all that. She simply stated that she does love me but as a best friend or brother and that she just didn't feel that way about me. I won't lie, I was immediately hurt and retreated into myself by joking and saying something like "well of course you don't feel the same, I'm a mess" but I could tell she felt bad about how things went. But things went on and we continued working together for a time until she switched her schedule; someone was fired and she was moved, no bad blood between us. We still text a fair amount but the communication isn't as consistent as it was. But hey, that's life, we're all busy and I understand that. She recently found out she was pregnant and I'm incredibly happy for her, she's always wanted to be a mom so I'm excited for her. And even though the father is not in the picture, I didn't say anything about my feelings for her, I know how she feels and wouldn't want to add any more stress to her life. She knows I'm there for her no matter what and that nothing will change that. Even if she told me one day that she felts the same way about me, I don't know if I'd believe it. I think my immediate response would be that this must be a trick or she's settling for the safe option or even worse, that it's pity. Love hurts and I just want it to stop.

I’m (35f)an African American woman married to my husband, Dave (40m), who is white. We’ve been together for ten years and married for six. We have a beautiful 5-year-old daughter named Reese. Dave has always been supportive and loving, but lately, I’m at my wit's end because of his mother, my MIL, Carol.
Carol and I have never had the warmest relationship, but things have taken a turn for the worse over the past few years. From the beginning, Carol has made offhand comments that I initially brushed off as ignorance. Things like, “You speak so well for someone from your background,” or asking if my hair was real. As annoying as those comments were, I tried to maintain peace for the sake of my husband.
The first major incident happened at our wedding. Carol made a speech that included a “joke” about how she was surprised her son was marrying someone “so different.” Dave apologized profusely, and I tried to let it go, thinking it was a one-time thing.
Fast forward to a few years later, when Reese was born. Carol’s behavior has gotten progressively worse. She constantly criticizes how I raise Reese, implying that my cultural background is somehow detrimental. She’s made remarks about Reese’s hair, questioning why I don’t straighten it, and even suggested I lighten her skin with some old “home remedies.”
The breaking point came a few months ago during a birthday dinner for my child. Carol hosted the family dinner and repeatedly made racist jokes and comments. When I confronted her, she dismissed me, saying I was being too sensitive and that it was just her “sense of humor.” Dave, caught in the middle, didn’t know how to handle the situation and ended up saying nothing.
After the dinner, I told Dave how deeply hurt I was. He promised to talk to his mother, but Carol doubled down, saying that I was trying to drive a wedge between her and her son. Dave has tried to stand up for me, but it’s always a half-hearted effort, and I feel like I’m constantly fighting this battle alone.
Now, I’m seriously considering divorce. I love Dave, but I can’t subject Reese to this environment. She’s starting to notice the tension and the hurtful comments, and I refuse to let her grow up thinking this is normal or acceptable. Dave wants us to go to family therapy, but I’m not sure if that will help or if it’s just prolonging the inevitable.
AITA for considering divorce to protect my daughter from my MIL’s racism? I feel guilty even thinking about it, but I don’t know how much more I can take.
TL;DR: My MIL is racist, makes hurtful comments about me and my daughter, and my husband isn’t doing enough to stand up to her. Considering divorce to protect my daughter. AITA?

AITAH for breaking it off with my dance partner?
I (26M) am I professional dancer and I make a pretty good living off of it while working at a department store on the side. Ive been dancing ever since I was 12 and I met my dance partner (now 27M) in college four years ago and weve been dancing together ever since. Sometimes we do solo competitions but most of the time it's duets. We've been told we have really good chemistry on stage and we've won a lot of competitions together. We're also really good friends and he is one of my only friends that I still talk to from college. I really love him and I feel so bad about doing this but I feel like I have to.
Me and Adam (My dance partner) usually compete with hip hop, jazz, freestyle ECT. Nothing slow swoony or romantic since we are straight men and just friends, but last weekend Adam's sister Bianca, (25F) entered an amateur couples dance competition for fun and Bianca asked if Adam and I wanted to enter with her and her fiance since Adam didn't have a girlfriend. I'm already friends with both Bianca and her Fiance so they thought this would be fun to do together.
I told her that it sounded fun and would be nice to just dance for fun and not for a prize for once, and even though me and Adam aren't a couple were both straight and already dance together so it wouldn't be weird. Adam agreed and we entered together.
The dance was a salsa which I already knew a lot about because I'm from Cuba and studied forms of Latin dance in college. Adam took some of the classes with me so we're both sort of familiar with it.
The dancing started out fine, it wasn't anything crazy just one of those casual things where they all dance in a big group and the judges pick out who stays each round. long story short me and Adam ended up in the finally three. We'd never danced like this before and I was really enjoying it. I liked how it felt to dance so close to Adam but I deffinately got a little too into it because when the section ended I had a boner.
we won the competition and I don't think he noticed but I'm still a little confused. I know it's a thing a lot of guys experience when they dance in general but it's not something that happens to me very often. I usually where a belt for that purpose but I thought this was casual and I wouldn't have to, but clearly I was wrong. I haven't talked to him since then and I can't stop thinking about how good it felt to dance next to him like that.
I don't like guys but I can't deny what happened and how it made me feel. What should I do next?

some context:
narc in question is my ex (diagnosed NPD). we met through a mutual friend who i had known first, who is now her best friend. their relationship started as an affair (friend was stuck in a traumatic & abusive relationship at the time), so they are also exes. friend now is in a stable healthy monogamous relationship, as far as i can tell.
as long as i have known my now ex, she has idealized this friend. i think a large contributor to her deciding to devalue and discard me, was because i had expressed anger towards him for mistreating her during their relationship. she spent an increasing amount of time with him & insisted on visiting him every 2 months, to which I objected bc she was flat broke and owed me over $1k for apartment fees i covered. a large blowup happened because i did not want her to do this during a high spike in covid cases. eventually i became paranoid about this codependent relationship, esp due to the context of their prior affair. this infuriated her.
fast forward. breakup/discard was sudden and traumatic. i was already suicidal prior to the discard, then spiraled out of control. she had a habit of coming back to me for sex or money, then blocking all contact. i finally snapped and tried to end my life. my memory is foggy, but i do remember messaging the friend, disclosing i had already overdosed, begging for contact with my ex. his discord status visibly went from online to on his phone, his twitter remained active while he effectively left me to die. another friend got me to the hospital immediately when he realized what was happening.
my ex came back for a second try at the relationship, left again. she now lives with this friend & his partner (plans to never have a romantic relationship again and live with them for the rest of her life). this friend cut me off during her most recent discard of me. we made up recently & in a moment of anger i admitted i hated this friend now as i was traumatized by his abandonment while i was dying. she defended and even praised him, threatened to cut me off, & kept asking how i could even like her if i hated him? she was genuinely confused that i could see them as separate people.
the odd thing is, is that said friend is quite cold and unaffectionate. definitely not a good supply.
he was always cold to her when i saw them interact, even mean. she confided in me that during their relationship, he was poly, and he let his partner beat her. when she had mental breaks, she said he told her to get over it. she expressed this all humorously, even with praise. all while she treats me like a monster, and guilts me by saying she would cut off anyone for what I’ve done to her, but she loves me so much so i’m lucky.
i’m sorry for rambling. unfortunately, this barely scratches the surface here.
has anyone else experienced anything similar? will a narc include someone else in their delusion, believing them to be incapable of doing wrong? what purpose does this serve?

Its an episode about AI writing a poem. The episode starts at a wedding with an AI developer showing the AI to a friend that is a comedy writer for SNL. They did then ask the AI to write poems about things in specific style. Then they eventually asked the AI to write about people in his own style. And the AI was voiced by a very good voice actor. Thanks in advance.

(My profile is tagged N-S-F-W because I also post these in dirtyr4r since some have actually had luck finding something serious there. Figured it's worth a shot, haha.)
I'm searching for the kind of wonderful woman who shares most of my interests below in addition to her hobbies and interests, who's also goofy, likes to playfully insult each other, and also believes in open and honest communication. I believe with that, we can work out any problems when they arise. 💛
• I'm a gamer, car guy, and maybe one day, a musician too. I enjoy anime, nature, going on little adventures, swimming, traveling... I wanna see the world with you before all the beautiful sights are gone. - Current games I've focused on lately is Helldivers 2 and Deep Rock Galactic. If you wanna play those together, that would be awesome! I would also eventually like to play other things together like Stardew Valley, Minecraft, Terraria, etc. - My taste is music is nearly everything except country and today's rap. To name a few bands/musicians I really love: Led Zeppelin, Arctic Monkeys, Tame Impala, The White Stripes, The Raconteurs, Queens of the Stone Age, Mac Demarco, Them Crooked Vultures, and Metronomy.
• I want to dance with you. In the living room, bedroom, back yard, in the park, almost anywhere. I enjoy doing romantic things and expressing my love. I love deep conversations that distract us from the passing of time.
• I'm a dog person because my allergies chose to target cats for whatever reason, so there's that. 😅
• I'm monogamous and don't have children currently, but they're in my future plans, probably within the next 6 years. I want to spend plenty of time with, well it might be you, and enjoy the best of life as a couple, and then as spouses, traveling and whatnot, before we start a family. 🤗
• I'm really hoping to find someone who's also into dirty humor (amongst other forms of humor) and has mutual...interests 😏 so we have even better compatibility in the bedroom (and sometimes away from home too). I usually have a high labido, but I only want to get intimate when we're both comfortable and ready. 👉👈
• Specs for those who would like them: - 6 feet tall (about 183 cm). - 219 lbs and dropping (about 99 kg). ~ My figure is very dad-bod at the moment, but apparently it comes with a nice ass (so I'm told). ~ This is close to the most I've ever weighed, and I'm not happy with it. I'm targeting somewhere around 170 lbs (about 77 kg). - Brunette/dirty blonde, kept relatively short. - Blue eyes. - Caucasian.
• I have learned the hard way that I do have a type. I used to date outside that type, and it only led to hurt feelings, so I don't want to repeat that. That being said, my type is Caucasian or East Asian ranging from petite to average body type. I don't love going to the gym, but if you have or want a membership I would be open to going together. 😁 I apologize if my preferences differ from who you are. You're all beautiful people, regardless! Please love yourself and enjoy the time you're given in life! 💛
Chat with ya soon! 😁

Hey everyone (:
■ READ EVERYTHING BEFORE SENDING A MESSAGE ■
■PLEASE SEND AN INTRODUCTION AND PICTURE ■
Young lady seeking a life partner to love and be loved in return .
●VIDEO AND VOICE CALLS IS A MUST . IF ITS SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT COMFORTABLE WITH DONT MESSAGE ME
If you don't think we'd be a good match don't message if you don't have the capability to communicate and get to know me .
https://imgur.com/Okqs2IZ
Send message via chat ! My Dm/pm doesnt work (:
I'm black , 5'3 , born and raised in Montréal , Introverted, Demisexual. Healthcare worker .
I'm kind , loyal , supportive and looking for the same in a partner who also values honesty , communication, commitment.
I want to go through life with someone that's willing to grow , heal , learn , openminded , We accept each other for who we are but are open to criticism and respect, love , kindness is the center of our relationship.
Location: Montréal Canada
Interests : working out , concerts , hockey fan, romance novels .
Looking for : life partner 28-40 Someone willing to take things slow , open minded , emotional available and can communicate must be a good texter, phone calls , video call is a must
Religious beliefs : Christian but mostly spiritual / liberal views .I believe in God
Deal-breaker: I can't date someone without a job , doesn't take accountability, doesn't apologize, any form of abuse will not be tolerated . Men with children unfortunately.
Likes : Beards, sense of humor, family oriented, liberal views , British accents . Puts 100% in all aspects of their life ( friendships, job , Relationships, mental health , self care )
I take pride in communicating effectively, effort being reciprocated so I expect the same in my partner.
I don't see myself living anywhere else so if you're open to long distance relationship keep in mind I'm not moving and if you aren't either then there's no point in us talking .

Here I sit, watching Ripley, pondering life. Career I love, home I love, family I love, just missing something.
Not looking for anything romantic just a new friend to chat with. I'm into music and film and bourbon and football. Sense of humor in tact.
Hope you send a chat + lemme know what you're up to. Let's be friends in this crazy world?