Monday is the first day of the work week that many people dread. Not all people dread it, but some. Let's take a look into the Numerology of Monday to decode the energy and what it can be used for to work with it and not against it.
M - this is the 13th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 4. The energy of 1 is action and the energy of 3 is connecting with others through collaboration. This puts a focus on responsibilities and for most people, it's a work or school day which connects with this. Although it is about being responsible, it's still the energy of 4 which is mellow and controlled energy. O - this is the 15th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 6 which is about using your creativity constructively to take care of the tasks or duties you need to take care of. 6 is the number of beauty, duty, and routine. N - 14th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 5. This is about using your energy to be responsible and making space for enjoyment while doing so. 14 is a karmic number, but not when used correctly. As a karmic number, 14 is about someone who ditched their responsibilities and now have to deal with some challeneges(5). Proper use of this energy is using it for creative purposes. D - 4th letter vibrating at the purest energy of 4 which is about calmness, caution, and security. A - vibrating at 1 as the first letter of the alphabet, this is about action and energy. Y - The 25th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 7, but through cooperation with others(2) and compassion for others(2) and with the use of creativity (5) or even humor(5). Big lover energy as 5 can point to romance and 2 can point to soulmates.
Monday full numerology comes down to 8 and 8 can represent long and drawn out processes, wait times, and pressure. The dreadful energy can be moreso due to this 8 energy. People can work with this energy by being patient as 8 points to tedious tasks. With this insight, you can now simply start expected a little time in between things and pacing yourself. It can seem like a long day or your duties may be plentiful.
This is a day best utilized in a constructive (8) way with the use of wisdom and calculation(7). The 7 is the soul urge influence of Monday based on the vowels. 2 vowels A and O which equals 7. Being calculating and seeking depth will allow you to master the energy of Monday. Use this day to get the most done with your projects or workloads.
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Hello everyone! I have recently started getting into perfumes and I've been unsuccessful in finding something very particular.
I am talking about the drydown of CH Good Girl. The perfume itself is a bit too strong floral in the beginning, but I found myself enjoying it after 3-4h when it settles down. It smells buttery, smooth, creamy, with just a hint of feminine flowers. I love that!
First I wondered if maybe the body mist of CH GG could be what I am looking for, but I cannot find a place where I can test it. Maybe someone has and can tell me if it is it. Also, another perfume which gives me the same creamy vibe is Khamrah qahwa, also in the drydown. I believe it is the Tonka bean, maybe the vanilla and pralines.
I have already checked tens or hundreds of perfumes on fragrantica that could potentially smell like what I am describing. I went out and smelled as many as I could (western designer scents since there is no Arabian store here), but nothing really fitted. Most of them are just so nauseating, flowery that I cannot even wear to get to the middle or drydown. It is funny because I do own flowery or sweet scents which I have no trouble wearing, but I guess some combos are not for me. I will write the perfumes I own and how I feel about them,to maybe give you guys a better idea of my taste:
Designer perfumes: -Shiseido Zen: love, casual wear -Chanel Chance: love, wear anytime -Coco Mademoiselle: okay, love the drydown -Mugler Alien: very nice, wear anytime -Versace Crystal Noir: used to love, now is a little bit nauseating -Bottega Veneta Knot: love, strong opening,borderline nauseating, only wear for events -Roberto Cavalli Serpentine: love, only for events -Ysl Black Opium: okay,I can wear it, not really wow -Gucci Envy me: omg no, was a gift for my birthday long time ago, my teeth would hurt of how sweet and unbearable it was😆 -Men's perfumes that I enjoy as well: Dior home intense, Dior Home eau for men, Terre d'Hermes intense, Burberry black bottle for men
Middle eastern perfumes: -Khamrah OG and Qahwa: love both, more evening/event wear type for me -Ameerat al Arab: love, not nauseating at all even tho it is floral -Infini Musk: love love -Infini Rose: like, bit the bullet with this one,even tho I can't really wear rose, makes my tummy turn a little. -Fakhar:.....no.... the lily smell is extremely strong,can't smell any other flower, I got instant headache -Bint Hooran: no, same thing like Fakhar, soooo overwhelming for some reason - Infini Oud: love, very smooth and cold to my nose.
So jasmine is fine, rose water maybe, tuberose no unfortunately 😅, Coffee,Tonka,praline,vanilla,musk,amber,woods YES Bergamot,cardamom,vetiver YES
From my research, what could fit maybe is Shaghaf Oud Tonka, Elie Saab girl of now, Qissa delicious, Dior Addict, Dior Fève Délicieuse (this is way out of the budget but maybe an Arabian perfume similar to it). I could not smell these yet...
Someone who has smelled these or something similar to what I am describing, help please! 😃😃
Long story short: who knows anything which smells close to CH GG drydown: creamy, smooth, kinda yummy, feminine, almost like you wear the most expensive buttery lotion with a touch of flowers? Many thanks!!!

I'm a 28-year-old man who moved to a new city three years ago, ending my relationship with my long-term girlfriend. I've been dating frequently since then, initially casually, but more recently with the intention of finding a lasting relationship. I've been on dates with around 60 different women, most of them only once, and some for 5+ dates, but not many have sparked my interest enough to pursue further.
-LONG POST- A few weeks ago, I reinstalled Tinder and matched with a woman (A) of the same age. Her profile was managed by her best friend (B) as she couldn't be bothered. B and I chatted briefly before A took over. We discovered that we were going to the same club that weekend, so we decided to meet there. Both A and B are hilarious and we talk for maybe an hour or so outside. One of the things we talk about is dating and she tells me she came out of a 7 year long relationship last summer and has only been on 3 dates since, one of them which ended up being catastrophic but a fun story. I also met some more of A's friends who seemed to approve of me as they’d seen my profile too, they told me that they hoped they’d see me again. We all say goodbye and me and A keep talking through Tinder. Everything feels great and her friends have already met and veto:ed me! Next week me and B finally meet one-on-one and holy shit, everything feels so extremely natural. She’s funny, empathetic and easy-going. Coming from my own dating experiences I realized quite quickly that this is something special, I’d never felt things going this well before as she was so easy to talk to. Apparently she had turned 29 the day before. We grabbed some beers at different bars until late evening where we walked back to the metro. On the way we stopped at a viewing point with an amazing night view of the city and kissed for a bit there. I told her I had a really nice feeling about her and she said likewise. I had a smile on my face going back home. After saying goodbye I messaged her on Tinder and asked for her number which she was happy to give me and we continued on the convo there.
We had been talking clothes/fashion shortly during the first date and she asked me couple of days later if we were going to do the shopping date as a next date to which I responded “Sure! If you think that sounds fun. Or I could cook you some food?” to which she said something like “Yes let’s do it! Let’s save the dinner at home for another time, although it sounds amazing!”. We scheduled for Friday the same week and we kept talking throughout the whole week through text with good banter.
Friday comes and we meet up for some shopping. I had gotten her a nicer chocolate as a late birthday gift, something inexpensive but thoughtful. She loved it. We go to several stores and also a sports store as she needed to look at some cycling gear. It felt like we were really good friends and that we had known each other for longer that we actually had. After an hour or two she wanted to grab a beer as she was exhausted and I suggested a nearby bar but we ended up going to my office since it has a nice terrace to enjoy the sunset at. I grabbed us couple of beers and we just sat the rest of the evening talking about everything, getting to know each other further. At one point, she facetimed B and we all talked a bit. I asked B jokingly “When am I going to be seeing you again?” to which A asked me “What are you doing tomorrow? I’m hosting a late birthday celebration”. I responded that I was going to a dinner with a friend but then no further plans. She said “Let’s talk tomorrow and see”. Later during the evening we both opened up a bit more. She works as a nurse and did that during Covid and talked about the first time she saw people die and how hard it was on her. I felt like she was very comfortable sharing her thoughts, but that might've been because that's what she's used to in her earlier relationship? We kissed a lot too during the evening, which she seem to enjoy and also initiate. we even fondled each other a bit but it didn’t go further than that since we weren’t at home. I pointed out when we were talking that I felt it was nice that she was talking in a way that implicitly meant that she thought we were going to continue seeing each other. And she responded with that I do it too. At last, she said she was tired and we decided to call it quits and kissed goodbye.
Come Saturday, we text a bit and I ask her during the evening how the party’s going. She responds an hour later that she didn’t have her phone and she’s been busy but everything’s going great and she asks how we’re doing. I respond and also ask her if me and my friend could maybe come over? Another late respond and she tells us that tonight might not be a good time, wishing me a good night. A bit bummed but i realized it might’ve been early for me to join in on a party like that with her close friends even though I met most of them already at the club we met at.
Sunday and we text sporadically about our day, I ask her on Monday if she’d like to take a picnic in the sun after work on Wednesday and she responds that “She’s been thinking during the weekend and feels like she’s not emotionally ready to keep seeing me. Which sucks because I’m great in so many ways but she wanted to say it early to not drag me along.”
I was a bit surprised and saddened by this, but also confused. My female friends suggested that perhaps things were moving too fast and that my openness about my feelings might have scared her away. Like f.e me saying things like “I have a good feeling about you.”, “It feels like we’ve known each other for longer than we actually have” and generally formulating sentences in a way that indicates that I want to keep seeing her. I thought I was paying her compliments and showing my seriousness towards her. It’s hard for me to not overanalyze the final date, if it was something that I said or did (or did not do), but I know that doesn’t really help me. In hindsight, I probably liked her more (and showed that) than she did me, even though she liked my company.
I talked to my therapist briefly about it and she kind of confirmed my suspicions but also told me that she probably has a totally different reference frame when it comes to dating and that she might’ve gotten scared as she has barely seen what options are out there. She didn’t think it was impossible that A might reach out to me but advised me to lay low for a month or two and maybe then shoot her a text and ask how she’s doing in an attempt to rekindle things maybe.
What are your thoughts about all of this?

i asked my mom if i can get a tattoo for my 20th birthday, i’ve wanted one for years now. i told her i wanted a skull tattoo, specifically from cyberpunk. she then asked me if i was sure, saying “a skull tattoo isn’t ladylike”. i’ve dealt with her insulting me and putting me down for years bc of the way i present myself and how i feel comfortable in my body. can someone explain to me how a SKULL tattoo is not ladylike. it makes absolutely no fucking sense to me and it honestly just pissed me off. she’s constantly putting me down for the clothes i wear calling me a guy or a lesbian, making me so self conscious that i change my outfit. like i said before i’ve been wanting a skull tattoo for yearssss and i don’t want to get turned away from something i want just bc she has a weird fucking brain. can someone help me figure out how to feel about this?
i’m just so tired of hating myself and the way i dress, bc i do like the way i dress, it makes me comfortable but i hate when she looks at me and makes a face or insults me. not to mention we went grocery shopping and i got those gummy scooby snacks (BC THEYRE GOOD) and she says “you’re almost 20”. as if turning 20 means i cant get a fucking snack just bc they’re named after a kids show. always calling me childish for random shit. she tells me to “get over” my ocd and never even tries to help me. she notices when i’m depressed and in the years since i’ve been diagnosed has never asked me how i am or tried to really help or understand how i feel. she blamed me for her starting to smoke bc i was stressing her out when i was in outpatient program for my depression. she made it about herself and when i couldn’t control my emotions she called me childish. i was reacting like that (in a childlike manor ig, “stomping” sort of) bc she was making me worse than i already was and i didn’t know how to handle it. i felt like i wasn’t being listened to, bc i wasn’t. idk why she always has to put my down, i don’t do anything like that to her or anyone else. i don’t care what people do or wear or anything, but she does and she will always make sure i know it. she blows off every defense i say and will always resort back to me acting like a child and not a mature adult as if i’m not 19 years old. turning 18 doesn’t automatically make my fucking brain change. can someone give me advice on all this? i’m just so sick of it

Poor Brock, having to leave all his stuff behind in Natick and get stuck in Framingham for a week riding a bicycle trying to learn Mandarin from two young elders...
Now he's back with his current companion "Elder Fortaleza" near Boston Common trying to bounce between Portuguese and Mandarin...
Sourdough bread count:42 as of this past Sunday(which was given to "senior missionaries" visiting from Oakland)...
Not much from him this time, but it's gonna be twice as hard celebrating his 20th birthday on Monday without Boston at his side...first time Brock is alone 😔:no Boston, no Kesley, nothing...

On my friends 20th birthday, his girlfriend who was my best friend at the time arranged for the close friend group which included me, her, the boyfriend and three other guys to all stay in a hotel. Her and her boyfriend shared a room while I shared a room with the other guys.
The entire day was really fun, it all went well until it was time to go to bed. By that time, all of us except one guy (let’s call him John) were either drunk or tipsy. I started doing my skincare routine before bed and John followed me to the bathroom and was super flirty the entire time.
I was supposed to share a bed with another guy who I was more comfortable with, but John told him to switch beds so he could share a bed with me. I was like “okay whatever we’re just gonna sleep”.
When the lights switch off, John is immediately touching me and getting sexual. I was hesitant to reciprocate but in the end I did. We didn’t have sex, but we just touched each other. Eventually, we fell asleep.
Next morning, I find out John has told my best friend that I raped him. Over the next few months, he went around slandering me and telling everyone I was a rapist.
Luckily, I was able to clear my name and tell everyone the truth, but honestly, when guys bring up the “girls will falsely accuse you of rape” shit in an argument, shit just makes me mad because it’s not just girls doing this lmfao.

So... I'm a guy and I have a really amazing friend, I don't know where I would be without her. We got on really well from the moment we met and have really been there for each other in a lot of ways. She has a boyfriend, and he's a really good person too! We all spend a lot of time together and I've gotten to know him well. He's kind and funny and really cute, he even gave me a gift on my birthday! And my friend is always telling me how cute her boyfriend thinks I am. The other night we were talking, and she said he asked for a pass on me while they were discussing passes and things like that. They're a really open couple, and very sex positive, so I've heard them discuss those topics before. But I was really shocked to hear that he wanted a pass for me! I really like him and I wouldn't be apposed to the idea, but I also can't seem to take my eyes off of him now. Whenever he's around I feel like I'm sending signals that I'm not even trying to send, and when he's not, I can't stop thinking about him. I also love and care about my friend, and I feel like a horrible person for looking at her man. I feel horrible thinking about him. I don't want to ruin the relationships that I have with them both. I'm genuinely terrified of losing them because they've become family in my eyes. I just don't know what to do. I feel like I'm lying.
How can I talk to my friend about this without destroying everything?

I've honestly given up on the whole idea of dating in the 21st century. As an asexual it's just too difficult to meet anyone who's goals ideas, boundaries, love languages aren't so confusing…well more so, someone who isn't afraid to speak up about that all that means to them. Social media and fear mongerors and incels have made to wear that if you're are overexulding with confidence, and grace, or at least funny over a screen it's not worth the time of day. I'm sure it may be easier to meet someone the old fashion way. In the community, ask them to hang out. But as a poet, the number one rule is to not date another poet because they will make you a poem. Even if I wasn't, it's not like I can exactly walk up to someone and offer to buy them a drink like they used to do. But once you've been drugged in a bar, even just once, that's not really the smartest option. Anywho idl. Just thought it was funny and you be fine with hearing my deranged thoughts because eventually there's going to come a time I'm just gonna disappear. I think about it every night because the way I see it I'm just delaying the inevitable.

My name is Emily. I'm from the United States and I wanted to end my 20's with a bang, and I'm happy to say that I ended my 20's in Korea.Actually, Korea was not a country that I had much to do with.Originally, I was a person who was immersed in Japanese culture since college.Japanese anime became my friend. There's a lot of interesting things about Japanese anime, like the fact that they depict real places in Japan, and they depict real food, and so I fell in love with Japan, and I even traveled to Japan a couple times, and I thought that Japan was the sum of everything that I longed for.
But then, in my late 20s, I met a friend who would change my life. It was a simple meeting with a long-lost college classmate, Sarah, who had gone on to work at a large firm in New York City, and whom I had shared anime and Japanese food with in my dorm room in college. She told me honestly that she had recently traveled to Korea and was seriously thinking about moving there. Unfortunately, the large company she worked for in New York had recently gone through a business crisis, and she was laid off.
She said that she was confused by the sudden betrayal of a well-known company, and to clear her mind, she went to the airport with the intention of leaving anywhere. She thought she would go to Japan, but when she arrived at the airport, she changed her mind. When she thought back to the places and restaurants she frequented most often while working at the company in New York, she remembered that she often went to Korean streets and Korean supermarkets in New York, and she thought that going to Korea on an impromptu trip was a really good idea, so she chose to go to Korea rather than Japan, which she already knew.
And buying a plane ticket on the spot at the airport was more than twice as expensive as booking a ticket in advance, but Sarah said that she didn't care, because she was depressed after being fired from her job, and she went to the airport to leave, but the curiosity about Korea that came over her made her want to leave right away, even if she had to pay for the expensive plane ticket.
He expressed that although he went to the airport courageously, he knew that the plane ticket would be too expensive, and he thought that maybe he should just go back home again, but his curiosity about Korea came from somewhere deep inside him, and it exploded like a bomb, and he was naturally drawn to it.
Sarah, who likes emotional things like essays and poems in college and enjoys such poetic expressions, but even so, I wondered if it was a little overdone, but when she said that she had been to Korea, I became more focused on her story.
However, I was able to understand why she expressed herself in such an over-the-top way after listening to her Korean stories.
"Korea is an amazing place, the people are so kind and warm, and most of all, the employment system is very well organized. There are many programs and support for job seekers, which is very helpful for people who are in a difficult situation like me."
When Sarah started with this story, I realized that she was really traumatized by being laid off.Now, she had been through a big ordeal and was in the process of recovering from it through Korea, so I decided to focus more on her story."You said you traveled to Korea, so what else did you do?" I asked."For example, what kind of programs were there?" I asked her.
"I happened to visit a job fair in Korea," she said, "where job seekers can get free career counseling and get the training they need." "I got a lot of help there, and it gave me the strength to get back on my feet, and maybe even get a job in Korea." "And most of all, the work culture in Korea is really family-like," she said, "I was impressed by how much my coworkers cared about each other and supported each other."
Sarah said that she was curious about what Korea was like, so she visited a large convention center in Korea and participated in various fairs, one of which was a job fair, and she interviewed with several Korean companies, and the Korean companies were ready to accept her as a colleague if she applied as an American. I also learned that Korea has many companies with global reach, and they are open to foreigners with various experiences, but in Korea, unless it is a large company, people don't prefer them, so if it is a small company, they want foreigners, but there is a sad reality that no one applies.
Unlike in the U.S., where you have to report your performance every week, and if you fall short, you are threatened with termination, Korean companies are definitely not more performance-oriented than in the U.S. They value their employees and do everything together to grow together, not threaten them with termination. In the past, I knew that corporate culture in Asian countries such as Korea was more collectivistic than individualistic, and as a student, I thought that such a collectivistic culture was a bad culture with a high level of disease in Asia, but after experiencing social life in the United States, I heard that the tendency of companies to be extremely individualistic, talking about job insecurity, and treating people ruthlessly, caused me to be fired from a good job overnight, and the future plans I had planned in advance became uncertain, and I even talked about envying the Korean culture that does not have such disadvantages.
Sarah, who has never worked in Korea, but was always afraid of being fired, said that she learned a lot about Korean corporate culture by interviewing many Korean company officials.
She said that she even considered settling down and living in Korea because, besides the culture, there were so many other conveniences and benefits.
She talked about her experience of working in New York, being left alone in the office to get things done because of her performance, having to leave late at night and being afraid to go home, sleeping in the hotel next door, and having to live with the exorbitant rent in Manhattan and the two-hour round-trip commute to work, and how she realized that unlike in the U.S., where it is difficult to see a doctor, she would not have to worry about these things in Korea.
Sarah's story made me even more curious about Korea.The warmth, systematic system, and various charms that she experienced in Korea couldn't help but have a great impact on me.I've been experiencing a lot of stress every day due to the pressure of performance and the threat of being fired, and I've recently been undergoing expensive psychotherapy.I decided to learn more about Korea, and eventually decided to travel to Korea.
Of course, I didn't travel to Korea with the intention of moving to Korea or settling down in Korea, but rather to spend my last 20s in a new country, Korea, and to see a different world than the familiar Japan.
I made my preparations and headed to Korea sooner than I expected, arriving ten days before my birthday and extending my itinerary beyond what I had originally planned, staying in Korea until after my birthday and then flying back to the United States.
The first day I finally arrived in Korea, I started walking around the streets of Seoul.The first thing that greeted me was the warm spring weather in Korea.The sky was clear and the air was crisp.I was told that it is common for Asia to have very bad air quality in the spring due to the influence of China, but I didn't have to deal with that during my trip.
The streets of Korea are very different from the United States, and everything was new to me.There were many beautiful flowers in bloom, and the well-maintained trees were really beautiful.It has been a long time since the common people's neighborhoods in the United States have such beautiful landscaping because of people who destroy these trees and flowers for no reason, or secretly take them and sell them.But this was not the case in Korea.The streets were like a beautiful flower garden.
I was walking down a beautiful street lined with flowers, and I was looking at them, looking at the big big map that was displayed on the screen at the bus stop.I was just curious to see what my neighborhood looked like, so I was looking at the map and taking my time, and a middle-aged woman came up to me and said, "Where are you looking for?" She didn't speak fluent English, but I was so grateful that she was trying to help. I was too embarrassed to tell her that I was just looking at the map, so I told her one of the destinations I was planning to go to, and she gave me direct directions to the place I was looking for, and I was able to get there without any difficulty.This unexpected kindness opened my eyes to the Korean people and warmed my heart at the same time.
I was ready to accept everything in Korea with an open mind.The first impression was very good, I was touched by the kindness of the people.I couldn't ask for anything more from Korea.The food was so fresh and amazing to me.I visited Gwangjang Market, a famous traditional market in Korea.
Unlike a regular restaurant, it was a place where you could sit down and try a variety of food. As a traditional market, it was full of Korean food. There were no pizza, pasta, or burger joints, but I liked it better that way. It was a place where you could see the traditional look and feel curious about everything.
I also tasted foods such as tteokbokki sundae and hotteok.Everything else was fine, but I was a little worried when I first tried sundae because it looked so strange and a little gross, but I decided to give it a try and the moment I put it in my mouth, the rich flavor filled my mouth.Korean food often seems difficult to eat, but when you try it, you can see why it is so popular in Korea.
I stayed at Gwangjang Market for a long time and tried a lot of different foods, especially kimchi and pajeon, which I still remember because of their crispy texture and spicy flavor. I would recommend them to everyone.Experiencing the deep flavors of Korean food firsthand made me fall in love with Korean food.
And then there was a shocking thing that happened to me in Korea.I was having a lot of fun traveling around Korea and everything was interesting, because Korea is really the best place to be, you know, you're running around, you're busy, you're going from place to place, and I had the misfortune of losing my passport, which was really stupid.
I was traveling in Korea, and I got an international call. Someone was calling me from Korea, and when I saw the international call indicator on my phone and realized that the call was from Korea, I had a million questions.
I thought I shouldn't answer the call, but then I realized that it was an international call, and I thought maybe they were calling me because they had some business to take care of. I answered the call, and I was told a really crazy story, because I heard a calm English voice asking if it was Emily, and she introduced herself as a police officer and asked if I could come to the nearest police station.
I thought I had done something terribly wrong, because I had just eaten delicious tteokbokki and sundae, kimchi and pajeon, and I was so happy to eat them, and afterward I was just walking around the streets of Korea, smelling the flowers and seeing the pretty trees.
I started to check my belongings one by one and realized that my small pouch containing my passport and some of the money I had exchanged was missing.
I quickly headed to the police station, which was where I was told to go, and from the front gate, I was controlled as to what I was visiting.
The great thing about Korea is that even for someone like me who doesn't speak Korean, it's not difficult to navigate these government offices. Not all Koreans speak English, but at least the ones I've met have been able to communicate with me in a simple way. Even if they don't speak perfect sentences, they understand most of the words, so I was able to communicate the reason for my visit to the police station.
I had never been to a police station before, even in the U.S., but here I was in Korea, and I was greeted by friendly people.The pouch with my passport in it had my contact information written on the inside, and they said they would contact me with that.The bag was found in a marketplace, and the first person to report it was the stall owner of the place where I had my first sundae.It also had all of my clean, new Korean money in it, which I had exchanged separately.
I was so impressed with how conscientious Koreans are and how good they are that I was able to find the pouch, sign the paperwork, and walk out of the police station.
I went back to Gwangjang Market, and when I got there, the owner recognized me and looked like he was about to say something. I held out the bag and showed it to him, and he smiled and liked it.
I thanked the Korean boss, and we ate another snack on the spot. It was an experience that made me realize how heavenly Korea is.
And like Sarah said, I didn't just want to see how clean and pretty Korea is, I wanted to see what an American working in Korea could do and what life would be like.Through the Reddit community, I was able to get in touch with Americans working in Korea and even met some of them in person.
David, the American I met, works for a company that is not a large Korean company, but rather a small or medium-sized company. As Sarah said, Korea is a country where products are produced for the global market, and many things are actually exported overseas.
However, in Korea, unless it is a large company, every company is experiencing a job shortage, and because of the atmosphere in Korea, where foreigners are not welcome at all, it is not difficult to get a job in a company that specializes in exporting overseas, even if you are in the United States.
And David told me that he put all his passion into the first company he worked for in the U.S., and even made a lot of money for the company, but when he didn't perform, the company fired him without mercy, and he said that he was so shocked, not to mention the feeling of betrayal, that he took depression medication at that time, and it was so hard that he took depression medication, and then he found Korea by chance and settled in Korea, and now he is so happy. He told me that he was fired from his job because of the unrelenting treatment in the U.S., that he found a second chance in Korea, and that he is happy with his life here.
I'm not sure I have the courage to move to Korea right now, but I learned that there are a lot of people like Sarah and David who have been hurt so badly that they end up leaving the country. I'm scared that this could be my future, but I also learned that Korea is an option for me if it happens to me.My trip ended like this: experiencing the culture, food, and hospitality of Korea, and getting to meet and talk to Americans living in Korea, made my trip much more rewarding than my trip to Japan, which could have been an anime trip.
Korea has given me new perspectives and experiences, shattered my notion that Japan is only good, broadened my horizons, and opened my eyes to another gem that is Korea.
I now like to say to my friends, "Go to Korea, you'll see how good it is." Korea has taught me so much, and I will cherish my experience in Korea, which now holds a special place in my heart.
If Sarah goes to Korea and settles down, I will be there to congratulate her and support her in her new relationship in Korea.

Yesterday was her birthday, I was doing okay on no contact for about 3-4 weeks. First week was the worst, broke it and realized how much of a mistake it was. I don’t know why but it physically and mentally killed me these past few days and I think it was because her birthday was coming up. I didn’t directly wish her happy birthday but sent her something to her house, couldn’t break my promise. Don’t know how she felt about that but whatever. I can’t do this anymore, I’m better than this. I haven’t been eating, haven’t been focused on school, I’ve been truthfully rotting these few days. I have a few friends I can cope to but I try not to because I don’t want to put them through that. It’s funny how I feel like I’m turning into her old version. I’m just letting my feelings out because I’m so tired of keeping it in my head. I loved her, she said she loved me. I don’t know how someone can say those exact words and not prove it to me, work things out with me if you truly feel that way. And then asking to be friends after a 8-9 month long situationship. I genuinely hate this generation, I feel like I’m more mature than people my age group. Sucks cause I felt she was too and still think that. I’m tired man I really am, how did I go from a straight A student involved in sports to a heartbroken, lonely, anxiety filled college student in a year. I still have feelings to work things out again, but time is powerful and healing. Whatever happens, happens. Starting tomorrow I’m going to change, I’m straight up just ruining myself. Shivering while typing this lol. I have to work on myself this summer and focus on school, I have no excuse not to. I’m promising myself tomorrow everything changes and I’m beating this version of myself. Straight work and grind throughout the summer, then going to live on campus and continue the process. I have so many ambitions and things on my bucket list I want to complete. If she doesn’t want to be with me then I have to live with that. All that matters is myself, my family, and my friends. God willing I can be shown to a path that’ll lead me to the light.
sorry for the rant i just wanted to let all my feelings out without just leaving it in my notes or whatever, feel free to kill me in the comments i dont care

You’d be happy to know that despite my best efforts to label you as the reason I was stressed, I was wrong.
You’d be happy to know I haven’t thought of you in 30 seconds.
You’d be happy to know I broke that streak.
You’d be happy to know that I’m a donor.
You’d be happy to know I haven’t had a cigarette in 109 days.
You’d be happy to know I sleep better.
You’d be happy to know I dream of you more.
You’d be happy to know I cry about her every day.
You’d be happy to know I’ve kept her things for you, just in case.
You’d be happy to know that I don’t look for you in everything like I used to. I see you in everything. You’ve given me an interest in architecture. You’ve given me an idea of what I want my children to be like, how I’d like for them to be raised. With that gentle, caring and compassionate demeanor. The same way you’d raised her. God she was so good, wasn’t she? She was good because you’re so good.
I meant for this to be a poem of sorts, but I’m tired of speaking so vaguely. I’m tired of trying to think of clever little signs to leave you, that only you would understand.
I just want to say how I feel.
It’s hard to believe that someone with so much goodness, just this genuine kindness, can truly exist in such a world. I avoid all of it, because it hurts so much to know that it can be so cruel. But you show it just how much sun there is to shine.
You and her both.
I’ll miss her for the rest of my life.
But I don’t have to miss you forever. You and I can still figure it out.
I hope we do. I hope you’ll visit someday.
I really need your guidance right now. I’m sorry again, that it took me so long to realize what was going on in my head.
It’s funny, how people like me can be mistook the way we are because of how we register social situations. Or like, our inability to register social cues the same way.
I laugh sometimes, about the instances in which I can remember people looking at me funny after I’d talked. LOL.
Good thing I don’t experience embarrassment, eh?
I like myself, regardless of what others honk I am supposed to be. But I’d truly love myself if I never let you go.
How could I be so reactionary? So stupid?
Where was this level headedness when I had you?
I know I keep saying “last one”, but I’ll probably spend a good amount of time writing to you. Even when you’re right next to me, sleeping off the night before.
Forever and always, Yours.

I can’t stomach Ruth’s supporters. I know I won’t change anyone’s mind but I wanted to talk about it. Let’s go back.
I like Ruth, I think she’s funny, smart and good friend. I like Issac too even tho he’s far from perfect, seems like a good friend and was constantly showed taking care of Khanya and trying to understand Ruth after the Nolla thing. However it definitely looked like Ruth and Issac had a bad relationship, not sure if toxic but definitely they hated their guts.
Ruth isn’t a victim. She had many issues with Isaac and was dissatisfied sexually and she knew before the pairing than choosing Nolla mean she was going to get into a full on relationship with him and she did it because Isaac upset her. She was ready to choose Linelin but Issac made a comment negative about her so she chose Nolla instead and cheated on the first night and Issac’s birthday.
That’s evil and immature. If Ruth was a male, she wouldn’t got so many people rooting at her.
She didn’t break up with Isaac even tho she had so many issues and dissatisfaction with him and prefered to cheated constantly with Nolla and tell her little brother about her sex with Isaac on international television instead of being mature and leave him.
Again, if roles were reserved the guy will be crucified, hating Issac doesn’t make Ruth right nor mature nor excused. Even Aiden was like “Nolla manipulated Ruth” no Aiden, Ruth wanted to leave with Nolla and fu*k Lebo. But also, she issued the ultimatum, she brought Isaac there knowing she was going to break up with him.
I know people will say he probably was going to cheated too if he had a chance, maybe so, we don’t know, but again that doesn’t make Ruth right or a victim. Hating Isaac shouldn’t be a reason for people to celebrate cheating.
Why do people think Courtney didn’t choose Nkateko? She was very attracted to him and she knew so she went with Genesis instead

So originally this was a question from a redditor, u/Madmax0622, about why Gepirone hasn't been on the market yet despite being approved in September, 2023 and doing some research into has led to a rabbit hole of murder, intrigue, and one very disappointed boy having his father arrested at his 7th birthday party. Okay, not really, but the story is interesting and there is some important points to make about how drugs become approved and how data is represented. So i thought I would mkae it a full post (and comments have a smaller character limit).

What the hell is Gepirone?

Gepirone (Exxua) is a novel azapirone drug that is thought to work as a partial agonist at the Serotonin-1a (5HT-1a) receptor. This is a fancy way of saying that Geprione is a drug that is structurally similar to other serotonin receptor agonists. In the United States we only have Buspirone (Buspar, approved 1986) as our 5HT-1a agonist but internationally there are several others such as Perospirone (Lullan, Japan), Tandospirone (Sediel, Japan), and Binospirone (China). All in all, these drugs share very similar structures and only really differ in their pharmacokinetic properties such as half life, bioavailability, and first pass metabolism.
Where Gepirone differs from these other 5HT-1a agonists is that it is a partial agonist which means that when administered into the body, it creates a partial response to the receptor rather than a full response. While Gepirone is novel because it is the first drug who's primary mechanism of action (MOA) is this partial agonism at 5HT-1a, it is not an unknown one. Several common medications also have this mechanism, such as some newer antidepressants (Trazodone, Vilazodone, Nefazaodone), old and new antipsychotics (Haloperidol, Olanzapine, Clozapine, Ziprasidone), and some other known anti-anxiety chemicals (cannabidiol, LSD, and gingko biloba).
So if Gepirone wasn't the first drug to work on 5HT-1a, why did it get delayed?

What did the data say?

Well I should say first that Gepirone did show benefit. In a double blind trial of two different doses of Gepirone in treating depression, patients received either a high dose, low dose, or placebo and were found to have lower depression scores (HAM-D) at the end of 6 weeks. Based on these results (among other trials, it takes years and millions to submit a drug for approval--im paraphrasing here), Gepirone's pharma company Organanon submitted their data to the FDA. Their package of data contained one positive phase 3 trial--a randomized trial of over 200 participants with drepssion who either received Gepirone and had a reduction in depression score of 9.05 points (17% reduction in depression score) vs those who received placebo and had a 6.75 reduction in depression score (13% reduction) after 8 weeks of treatment.

• Their big bad trial of only ~200 people is not really robust so the FDA rejected their 2001 application and told Organanon in 2002 that they needed two large trials with positive results. Okay....Organanon submitted the two trials in 2003 and even added in data on relapsing depression when Gepirone was stopped vs continued. What they found was that people who stuck with Gepirone ER (at this point they reformulated the drug to be extended release) had a relapse rate of 23% vs people who stopped the drug had a relapse rate of 35%. The FDA looked at this data and said, "yeah that's not positive enough" and walked out of the room.

Feeling dejected, Organanon was sitting on the marble steps outside the main FDA office when little Fabre-Kramer came walking by.

"Hey Organanon, did the FDA deny your reapplication?" Fabre-Kramer asked. "Yeah, they said my drug failed to show explicit benefit. That in the analysis of the main endpoints, submitting 25 studies and only have 2 be positive against placebo and the rest be negative or fail when challenge other established drugs doesn't show positive results." "Man that really sucks. How much did you spend on developing this drug?" "About $1.3 billion." "Well that's not too bad, you just got NuvaRing (2001, still makes up 22% of their revenue) approved and are making a killing off of it. Likewise you are still making boatloads off of Mirtazapine (1997)." "Well don't tell anyone but we are actually in a major scandal with Medicaid in Massachusetts and Texas where we were defrauding state government," Organanon lamented. "Yikes, that sucks," Fabre-Kramer said, "Hey, why don't I take Gepirone off yours hands. Afterall I originally got it from Bristol-Myers Squibb in 1993 before I sold it to you in 1998." "Aight, bet."

And so Gepirone was handed off to Fabre-Kramer in 2005 so Organanon could write off this whole venture to their shareholders.
Fabre-Kramer started by conducting an additional randomized trial of 238 adult participants who received Gepirone ER for 8 weeks. Results were....the same as before--people who received Gepirone showed a 10 point reduction while the placebo group showed an 8 point reduction. In 2007 this third trial was included and sent over to the FDA for approval (for the 3rd time) and the FDA looked at it and said, "yeah no thanks kid." They said that the positive results from the most recent phase 3 trials was good but the 23 other small trials that showed negative results was troubling.
Fabre-Kramer then pushed up their glasses and pulled up their suspenders a bit and said, "I'd like to appeal that decision" and in 2012 the decision was send to the FDA's Psychopharmacologic Drugs Advisory Committee (PDAC) in Dec 2015. In a 9-4 ruling, the committee voted that Fabre-Kramer smelled funny and they were dummy and that their drug was not good enough. They said they could resubmit another drug application again when they had more data.
Eventually Fabre-Kramer did submit another application in 2022 and Gepirone ER was approved by the FDA for the treatment of Depression in 2023.

If Gepirone was denied so many times, does that mean its a bad drug?

It would be easy to look at Gepirone's story and say that the drug is just not good enough and the pharma companies had to complete multiple trials (and thus generate more data) to prove its efficacy. Truthfully, its a mixed bag and I am going to try to shoot down the middle hear so you can make an informed decision on your own if you want to try Gepirone ER.
The Good

• Its always good to have additional drugs that focus on mechanisms that we know work. Remember that Gepirone works very similarly to Buspirone, as they both affect 5HT-1a, but importantly it has a longer half life. Unlike Buspirone, Gepirone is offered as an extended release form so instead of 3-4 doses a day you'd potentially only have 1 or 2.
• Now Gepirone is a partial agonist while Buspirone is a full agonist, which does have some important pharmacodynamic factors but based on the impact of other partial 5HT-1a agonists as discussed above, we can say that Gepirone is likely to work the way we want it. So you can attack the receptor that Olanzapine affects without all of Olanzapine's other effects.
• Likewise, the side effect profile is similar to or better than Buspirone. Again, this is most likely due to the improved half life or extended release.
• Gepirone also respresents another option for a non-traditional antidepressant that 1) does not cause weiight gain and 2) does not cause sexual dysfunction--two of the biggest reasons why people stop their depression treatment.

The Bad

• The data is very meh. Look at the differences in scores in these studies of reduction in depression score when given Gepirone vs Placebo: -9.04 vs -6.75; -10.2 vs -8.0; -9.0 vs -6.6; -10.1 vs -7.8. These differences are extremely close--a difference of 3 points (12.5%) in someone's depression? Would you take a drug knowing it would only lead to a potential 12.5% reduction in your depression after 8 weeks? Now its important to note that some people did have massive benefit, and im glad they did. But on average, 12.5%. Not great.
  • Now, don't get me wrong, Buspirone also doesn't have great data. In the trial that got Buspirone approved it showed that 7.5mg 3x daily of Buspirone had a HAM-D score reduction of 10.45 points vs the placebo of 7.92. So only a 10% reduction in depression score. But, then again Buspirone was primarily approved for anxiety, not depression like Gepirone, and Buspirone shows a 30-42% reduction in anxiety score at 8 weeks. Maybe Gepirone will show better results in Depression-Anxiety copresentation.

Alright, this is where my brain is wanting to stop for now. If I think of additional things to add I will throw them in. Cheers!

Is finding myself a flimsy reason to end my relationship?
Honestly, the title speaks for itself.
I F22 got married to M24 relatively young (engaged at 19 and married not too long after my 20th birthday) and when I was proposed to I was horribly depressed and if I had said no I may not have kept living for very long since I desperately needed something to cling on to at the time. Now, I'm a bit older, in a healthier mental state and have found my own reason for living that is not tied down to my relationship status. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever been mentally healthy and on my own at the exact same time. All that being said, I feel like I've really enjoyed the experience of being on my own as my partner and I are long distance right now due to means not entirely in our control for the time being.
I've found myself kinda feeling less than excited about visiting my partner, sometimes I don't even feel like calling them or texting them, and most recently when I visited my partner I didn't even want them touching me. This is especially tough because my partner tends to need a lot of physical touch and attention and I feel like I just have no juice in my tank left over to give them the full scope of attention and care that they deserve. This is even more frustrating because my partner tends to be very sensitive to my mood. This is difficult to explain but I just feel a deep yearning to lean more into this new aspect of myself and my solitude. I’ve overall have found myself feeling disinterested and emotionally unavailable for my spouse.
On top of this, it may be an another two and a half years before my spouse and I are physically back together again and thinking about what comes after that makes me feel extremely anxious. I’ve noticed a mixture of reactions to other people who’ve had a the same question as me- between it being completely wrong and cheap and that you should be able find yourself while still being in a relationship, or, it being acceptable. I feel very conflicted and I’ve found myself becoming more and more unavailable emotionally. I want to communicate these feelings to my spouse but I’m not sure what I’m hoping to accomplish from the conversation either. They’d probably die inside.
My spouse is amazing and our relationship is good outside looking in but I equally fear that I’m only holding them down and reaping the benefits of being married to them, as well as the lifestyle they are able to provide me. This just makes me feel more and more guilty.
Please don’t cook me in the comments, I just want genuine advice, and can fill in details where necessary.
TLDR; got married when I was young and mentally unwell. Becoming mentally well plus being I n a long distance relationship has made me realize how much I desire space and independence. Wondering if this is enough of a reason to leave?

hashtag fatherless behavior
life honestly sucks with a dad you have nothing in common with. it isn’t worth it. My father isn’t exactly present anyway and I’ve never had someone to teach me the basics a father would teach. I guess you could say I have “daddy issues” or whatever. I’m not good at a lot of things, I tend to get distant when I’m mad and I’m trying to overcome it. As weird as it sounds I feel a father figure would fix all my problems. But I don’t have that. I have a miserable mother that is the entire reason I don’t have a father to look up to. “fatherless” jokes really aren’t funny at all. And as much as I hate it I feel like I’m age regressing. All I want is to be a little girl with a father again but that will never happen. My birthday is soon and I hate growing up. I’ll probably be dead by the time my birthday comes around and for good reason. No one needs a shitty person like me around. My birthday is in three hours i cant do this anymore. i have no one too spend it with, this is my first birthday i have to spend without my grandmother. How can i be surrounded by people yet feel so lonely? Too many memories and thoughts are coming back at the worse time and it hurts. Im missing so many people right now its not even funny. Its been a year since my grandmother has died and everytime i think of her all i can see is her dead body on the kitchen floor covered in a blanket. I begged them not to take her body but they had too. I cant hug anyone without remembering how it felt to hug her dead body and feel the blood that collected at her back and how weird it felt, i cant look at my mother without seeing her scream and cry manically in the parking lot. I couldnt even let her drive that day. My stepdad had to as she cried in my arms in the backseat. Speaking of my mother. She keeps trying to make my birthday a big deal. She wants this big party. I cant. Every birthday ive had i think of the grandmother that died on my birthday a few years back and i didnt kniw until my brothers birthday, and now i cant be greeted by a back massage and chamomile tea by my bunica. I miss her voice, and i hate myself that im forgetting what it sounds like.

So way back when i was a kid in 2012, i was having a very great birthday (i was turning 11 years old) And when it was time to open my presents, i was a little confused because there was this random game called “Call Of Duty Black Ops II) I didn’t know what the FUCK a Call of Duty was, i didn’t know if my parents were asking me to go to WAR or something. But since i got my new Xbox 360 a while ago, i decided to play this game for a while to see how good it is, and HOOOLY SHIT, still one of the most fun games i’ve ever played in my life. Within a few weeks i quickly got addicted to this game and got my whole friend group to friend me on Xbox and just join up and play. It was the best fucking game ever, i remember the cool zombie mode, playing on Nuketown, my friends blasting new music and joking around, the lobbies getting insanely heated, all the cool trick shots we would watch on YouTube, it was the best and funniest shit ever. That game is literally the goat of shooting games, back then when we didn’t have stupid Overwatch shit. Fast forward to 2017 and i had just gotten my Xbox One. This random game on YouTube was trending and it was called Fortnite. I didn’t understand what the hell the point was and i thought i was too old for the game because it looked weirdly cartoony, but i still gave it a try because i thought i could relive memories from the Xbox 360. So i grabbed some of my friends and played the game for the first time and HOOOLLY SHITT it was amazing. I remember when the double pump first got popular, the dance moves like the floss, and trick shots were finally back on YouTube. New battle passes and skins would come out, new weapons, and new locations and glitches which would make everybody flip out. The lobbies were not as heated as Call of Duty were, but they were still funny and i remember trolling videos on Fortnite being on YouTube. And best of all? The game was FREE, no money spent to get better or anything. It was like living in 2012 again, i miss waking up everyday during Summer and hopping on with my friends on some Fortnite. I actually was good at the game too, i remember doing Boxfigjts with my friends when Creative was being released too. I even remember doing it with random people also. When i would win they would get so mad and i would record it and show it to my friends, i even made a YouTube channel out of it that got like 500 subscribers, which was pretty fucking cool.
Fast forward to now, and i’ve just gotten a Nintendo Switch OLED to experience some games, and i was looking for some multiplayer shooter games that could make me nostalgic for playing both of those games, and i found this random game called “Splatoon” What the fuck is this??? No, seriously, what is this? Why are they octopuses? Octopuses in a shooter game make no sense, i thought they were supposed to be real people. Apparently you can phase through walls if you turn into an actual octopus, which i guess makes the people in the games half humans, half kids, so i’ll give them that. But why would you want to teleport through walls? This isn’t Portal, and i’m pretty sure they had that in one of the Fortnite seasons too, but that season came out after the games came out, so again i will give them that. And why are they fighting with PAINT?? Does. the paint hurt the kids or something? Is it their kryptonite? What’s the single player campaign like? Is there a civil war? How does the American Navy fit into this shit? Are they in the Cold War? What countries are involved in this shit? America? China? Russia? North Korea? Not only that, but what about Multiplayer? Can you get into boxfights? What’s this games version of a victory royale? Can you hit the gwiddy once you kill some me? I guess with paint. I’m pretty sure you can’t do online voice chat anywhere on Nintendo Switch. Which is a shame, but what about trickshotting? Is there any clans? Do FaZe Clan play this game? I remember them playing Fortnite way back. How do you get skins and characters in this game? Is there Battle Passes? Events? I’m just assuming you get them in the singleplayer campaign. How does this compare to Call of Duty? I might get some friends and hop on this game, trying to relive some memories. But i just wanted to know some stuff before i decided. Thanks random sub.

Originally chronicled here.
I am not the OOP. OOP is u/Lost_Beginning_2824
This was originally posted in TrueOffMyChest
2 updates
(recovered via pushpull)
Original post - February 6th, 2024
1st Update - February 28th, 2024
2nd Update - March 8th, 2024
Trigger warning: mention of domestic violence situation
I’m married to a woman who acts like a teenage girl – February 6th, 2024
My wife behaves like a teenage girl and I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.
This is just a rant. Curious to know how many full grown adults behave the way my wife does. I’d say out of all of the adult women I know, like friends, relatives, wives of my friends, none of them behave this way unless they keep it a closely guarded secret.
Editing right here to add that my wife is in her 30s, for context.
My wife is always obsessed with somebody, a man or sometimes multiple men at one time. Usually there is one or two main focuses at a time. When I talk obsessed I mean obsessed like a teenage girl or maybe even preteen girl would be. I’ve seen pictures of her bedroom when she was that age and they were literally wallpapers in posters of her favorite guys. That’s totally normal for a 13 year old girl. She still behaves that way as a woman in her 30s. Granted, our bedroom walls aren’t wallpapered in posters but they probably would be if I allowed it.
Her obsessions have ranged from rock stars, actors, non-entertainment industry public figures. It’s like one day she hasn’t even heard of the guy in question and the next day she’s super fan #1 and knows just about everything there is to know about him. She will read and watch everything there is to watch about the man. She will bring him up in every conversation. She will adopt parts of him into her own personality. She will suggest things that make it clear to me that she wants me to adopt characteristics of these men as part of my appearance or personality. She will openly admit to me that she’s masturbated over the guy multiple times in one day.
When she finds a new man to obsess over, she puts the others in her little stable of men who she always has a place for in her heart and in her fantasies, so they never really go away. The new man just takes center stage and becomes the main focus of almost her entire life.
So the current obsession is so strange to me. Never saw this one coming, but leave it to her to always find somebody new to fall in love with. The intensity that she has during these periods - it’s honestly like she falls in love with these men.
I’m laughing so hard just typing this all. Her current obsession is Bret Hart, former pro wrestler. This woman had never watched wrestling before in her life. Always thought that stuff was below her. And now she’s obsessed with this former pro-wrestler. She watched one show about him, for reasons I’m not aware of, and I could tell almost instantly where it was headed. I thought “here we go…” So now the Bret Hart obsession is in full swing. Has she already dropped close to $1000 in vintage Bret Hart shirts on eBay? Of course. Bought all the stickers and magnets and all sorts of other stupid crap she can find? Yep. Does she send me Bret Hart YouTube clips all.day.long when she’s supposed to be working? Yes she does.
So, I better get to work brushing up on my Bret Hart knowledge and tag lines. This is the key to getting laid when it comes to her. I’m used to this by now. It’s just not something that I can easily explain to anyone I know.
I mean, there’s are things I’m a fan of, but she is next level. I can’t think of anyone I know who is her age and acts like this. She was voted most likely to grow up and become a groupie when she was in high school, so this is absolutely nothing new for her. Sigh.
Many are lighthearted in the comments
plastic_Schedule_891
I mean he's the best there is, was and ever will be so that one makes sense at least .
You don’t think I’m hearing that 10 times a day now?
I better start planning that trip to Calgary.
Limerence is mentioned
poopchutethemoon
Yeah my bouts of limerence have been with people I’ve dated but reading that made me realize that I was very much being obsessive and it was totally all consuming. Glad it’s over honestly. Those feelings are exhausting.
Very interesting to hear you say the feelings are exhausting. It’s like a full time job for my wife, so I could see that. She told me she’s at work with her door closed pretending to be working, but she’s really watching Bret Hart videos on YouTube. She can’t even focus on her job.
OOP reveals more of the life he’s signed up for in the comments
get-bread-not-head
You've pretended to act like other men for 20 years?!
Damn dude, I hope you're finding ways to accept it and cope. That sounds rough, having to be someone else to have sex... stay strong king
Nah, I just learn their catchphrases or gain some deep fan knowledge that’ll impress her or maybe perfect a vocal impersonation of them that I can drop at the opportune time. The vocal impersonations work the best as far as making her like me and being like “ok, wanna have sex now?”
another_canoe
But what do you guys actually share *together*? That's not related to the obsession of the season? (I'm not going to even bother asking if she's tried to learn about any of your hobbies/interests).
NGL, this is all pretty grim to me, my man....and I'm someone who loves having a partner who is passionate about things and nerds out.
I fear that you've spent so long with her infatuations steamrolling over your own interests and preferences that you have convinced yourself that getting attention-by-proxy as your main source of validation from your SPOUSE is a healthy way to live.
If I told you that I was big into anime and Japanese RPGs and the only way I get interested in doing it with my actual wife is if she adopts the catch phrases /personality characteristics of my latest "waifu", would you feel some concern for my wife's mental health?
I'm also wondering about this spending....
She’s pretty dismissive of my interests and hobbies. I’ve told her I’d like her to try to pretend to show a little more interest sometimes. I make an effort to show real interest in her stuff and she does not do the same. I’m very into music and I do geek out over guitars and gear and things like that and she couldn’t tell you anything about any of the guitars I own other than “he has a blue one, he has a red one. “ We do love some of the same bands. Of course she wants to fuck the band members and I just want to talk about the chord progression on my favorite guitar tracks, but it’s close enough. We like a lot of the same movies and that sort of thing. We have the same sense of humor and can keep each other laughing for ages. We have a lot of the same views on life and on the world in general.
I don’t know, we just get each other I guess.
I would be concerned about the waifu thing, but I guess in my case she always likes guys who I think are pretty cool anyway. She has good taste, at least. If she has to be obsessing over some other guy constantly at least she does it over guys I can respect on some level.
Regarding the spending, I spend way more than she does. Only difference is it’s not usually fan merch I’m buying. But she tolerate my spending when it comes to stuff like guitar gear. She rolls her eyes and reprimands me but she tolerates it and just knows I won’t stop. I’m the same when it comes to her fan stuff. I get it, she wants the vintage 1993 Bret Hart shirt that costs hundreds…not a modern shirt that just anyone could go online and buy for $25 right now. She wants the cool, rare stuff. I’m the same with my guitars so I guess it’s like we understand each other in some way. I think it’s weird to become a fan of somebody and 2 days later drop thousands on them though. At least my money pit is consistent.
I think we both feel like we’re the only person who will semi understand and tolerate all of this stuff from each other
Not included here, but in several comments, OOP definitely brings up his wife’s looks as a positive in the relationship and he finds her antics at times amusing or even attractive.
1st Update - February 28th, 2024
I recently wrote about my wife suddenly discovering former pro-wrestler Bret “The Hitman” Hart one day after never even knowing of his existence, experienced love at first site, and is now even deeper than love with him then she was a month ago.
Tonight, I experienced a good hour of her sobbing, literal sobs, after watching the Bret Hart A&E biography. “I just love him so much. I love him with all my heart. I don’t want any more bad things to happen to him. Also, I’m very jealous he’s not my husband.”
She also went from not wanting any kids to suddenly wanting a baby so she can name it Bret (a girl or a boy, doesn’t matter…they will be named Bret). And she almost had me convinced, but I blame that on the heat of the moment.
She’s bought all sorts of clothes just like his. My wife now dresses like Bret Hart in and outside of the ring.
The past few days she’s been acting really annoyed with me. Finally I’m like “Wtf am I doing wrong?” I bought you Bret Hart stuff for your birthday! I call you Mrs. Bret Hart now, even though you’re my wife. I even sent you flowers at work from Bret. I mean that was supposed to get me points because she knew they were from me and I was playing into her obsession which she’s now apparently shared with everyone she works with. They’ve bought her a giant Bret Hart wall decal for her office.
Ok, so I did forget our anniversary which was very recently. Totally forgot it. Then again, so did she. She was too busy masturbating over Bret Hart to remember our wedding anniversary. I mean bad husband points for me obviously but all the birthday gifts had to have made up for it. I mean, I even ordered a Bret Hart birthday banner and got her a Bret Hart themed birthday cake as if she were a 7 year old boy in the year 1994.
So why is she acting so annoyed lately? Why does she act like she hates me and can’t stand to even be in the same room as me? She finally admits…I’m not Bret Hart. None of her obsession have ever been this bad. She’s seriously threatening me with divorce now because I’m not Bret Hart! She “just wants a guy like that.” She had to go walk the dog today and cry over it, how much she hates me and wishes she was married to Bret Hart. Oh fuck me you want a guy like your dad because that’s what Bret Hart is like…exactly like her dad, the same look, the same hair, the same damn age.
I told her I think she should get checked out for autism or some other sort of disorder. Her obsessions have never been this bad. She should make an appointment now because the waitlist is long. She just laughed. There’s nothing wrong with her. She just has different taste in men now, according to her.
Some comments
psychick
Therapist here - she needs to see a psychiatrist. This is mental illness to the extreme. Either she goes, or you leave. This is ultimatum territory. And, stop giving into her obsession. It makes it worse.
nualt42
Man, when she threatens divorce, take it. Jump at the chance.
Hell, sit, be a good boy and offer your fucking paw if that’s what it takes to get treated to an exit strategy. Don’t worry about dignity, sounds like you gave that up a long time ago.
She’s even looked up the divorce process for where we live and says we can be amicable about everything. She assures me she’s not looking to take any thing that is rightfully mine. She just wants a clean break.
Sophie3546
I’m surprised he even lasted this long. Calling her “Ms. Bret Hart” …..I can’t even fathom.
Excuse me, it’s MRS Bret Hart, not Ms.
NEW UPDATE - March 8th, 2024
Hi, you might remember me as the guy whose wife was obsessed with JFK (35th President of the United States), then experienced a world wind romance with former WWF pro-wrestler Bret Hart (the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be), but now she’s met a new man. I thought the Bret Hart obsession was the worst one yet. Never has she threatened divorce or told me she hated me because I wasn’t the object of her desire. Luckily, that was a relatively quick love affair for her. 3-4 months is a short run for her and one of her men. But I should be careful what I wish for.
This new one is the first time I’ve felt that I should maybe, just possibly, feel legitimately scared. Her newly developing obsession is Patrick Bateman. Yep, the character from American Psycho. Specifically, the movie version played by Christian Bale.
It’s not like she’s just met the guy. She’s seen the movie before but it doesn’t appear that they hit it off initially. Now, she’s suddenly started making constant reference to him. Bret is gone and now it’s just Patrick Bateman and maniacal laughter and purchasing all of the items in his skin care routine. I’d like to see her do 1000 crunches though. That’ll be the day.
She has always admitted to living the 80s preppy/yuppie look. She loves assholes. Assholes are a weakness for her. Psychopaths? Hmm…that’s a new one, unless you count the time she was in love with the Menendez Brothers years ago. God, the pastel Ralph Lauren sweaters she used to try to make me wear. Pastels are just not my shades.
Now, there was a time many years ago where I did have to hide all the knives in our home. I was legitimately scared that she was going to murder me. I forget what she was upset about now. I am, after all, her type - an asshole. I did something that bothered her and she ran for the knives. I had to hide them and then lock myself in a bedroom because she was literally chasing me. That was before she decided that she’d be the female Patrick Bateman. Granted, she says “only mean in the looks and snob department-nothing else.”
She’s trying to determine what the female equivalent to a Patrick Bateman hairstyle would be right now. I’m just worried about the bank account with this obsession. The amount she’ll spend on business cards alone.
Comments
lemonade_sparkle
Your wife is severely mentally ill, and needs help quickly.
Is there no chance of persuading her to get help?
If not, what preparations have you made to leave her?
I’m a strange way, I think these obsessions are what keep her sane.
Her getting help is funny though. It’s not going to happen. Sure I’ve tried to persuade her to see a therapist but she just won’t.
ctIaTErA
I probably shouldn’t be laughing as hard as I am right now. This is truly bizarre. Does she narrate her morning routine in the mirror each day now?
But in all seriousness, she’s chased you with a knife? Thats far more concerning than any of the obsessions with these men, and yes I did read the post about the wrestler. I thought it was just very quirky behavior before, but she seems truly unhinged now.
It was years ago. Like 10+ years ago. I’m much stronger than her so it’s not hard to hold her down if need be.
I AM NOT OOP
NO BRIGADING, NO HARASSMENT

I was invited by a couple of friends to go camping a few days ago. I'm honestly still exactly not sure if any of it was real, but I wish to share my story nonetheless. It began last Monday, when friend number Six invited friends One through Five to a girls get away. She claims to have found this beautiful spot in the mountain on one of her hikes and she says it’s perfect for seeing the stars at night. I was skeptical at first, to be honest I don't really like being outdoors, but it sounded like an experience worth having, so I thought "why not, this will be a wonderful memory to look back on!". I had just purchased a new camera as well, so I was honestly starting to warm up to the idea. I could take pictures of our excursion into the woods and make cute little picture frames for everyone for their birthdays, it would've been so cute! But things did not go at all as I had envisioned.
So the day of the trip arrives, a bit faster than I would've liked, but honestly I think I was just anxious about… I kept feeling this weight in my chest that made it uncomfortable to breathe, but I was going into the woods, strange things happen to women in movies; Jason Voorhees, Sasquatch, Shia LaBeouf! Who knows what could happen! Not to mention there is always the chance I could fall into a lake and get covered in leeches, or get surrounded by wolves, or chased up a tree by a bear… Hopefully a very soft bear so I'll at least know one pleasure before I die! There are all sorts of fears I had envisioned before the day of the trip, but anxiety just be like that.
I met up with my friends at the trail and learned that friend Six decided to bring her bf along, which I was upset about but I guess he was just going to get a hotel room nearby so he'd be close enough to her to feasibly show up if we needed any help. She later told us that he worries all the time because his father went missing in these woods years ago and he's worried the same might happen to her. This is where I learned that men tend to stay out of those woods because men have been going missing in those woods for years, but according to friend Six, she's been coming to this forest for a while now and hasn't had any bad experiences. Hearing that did oddly put me at ease, but now all I could wonder at the time was what happened to all those poor men.
Deep into the night we're all chit chatting, talking about where we are in our lives, things that are bugging us, what our hopes are, and dancing to the music of nature… but which of course I mean we got shit drunk, smoked some great wee, talked about sex, laughed over silly anime scenes, and twerked to slipknot girly bops!. It was such a fun night at that point that I honestly wish I could go back and never let that night end. It was intoxicating how beautiful the sky looked, and when gazed up it was almost like we could scoop the stars into our hands and sip from the sea of stars. I was worried we'd just be on our phones all night filming tiktoks or something but even with no signal, no one really seemed to be too stressed about it, we all just kind of felt safe… Almost welcomed into the forest, like being embraced by a loving mother. But unfortunately, heaven isn't forever, and men come not but to steal, kill, and destroy.
As we were drinking we decided to tell some scary stories… or well I decided to because I thought "it's so cliché but we have to do it. It feels like tradition almost." plus I would've regretted it if we didn't do it, so fuck it, right? Right. So we go around telling scary stories to one another, and I mention to friend Six that I keep thinking about those poor men that went missing. I then asked if any women had gone missing, and surprisingly she said yes… it was way back in the 1800's but after that there had never been a single missing woman in that forest again. The forest was actually named after the first young woman who went missing all those years back, and now there are all these rumors about it but I don't believe in that stuff so I didn't really pay much attention… I kept thinking "I'll just wait for the manga… or the shitty Hollywood cash grab of it…" but I DO vaguely remember the history cause I find dark history lore to be super fascinating. So there was a time when the area had more Ojibwe people living here, before gentrification moved into town. She went on to tell us that The Ojibwe people eventually began to keep to themselves because as more white people moved in, more of their daughters went missing. There are yearly parades to honor the missing daughters and to spread awareness to those living in the town. The police try to shut it down but they still do it every year.
Not long after hearing that we hear something howl in the distance. Friend Three howls back and friend Five falls on her out of her camping chair laughing. I tell them to knock it off because the last thing we need is for her to accidentally attract a wolf during mating season! I don't know if that’s a thing, but it sounds like something that’s a thing… So I'm just going to assume that it is. Don't judge me. She then says "But what if it's Taylor Lautner? Or Joe Manganiello? Personally… I'm more of a Meatloaf guy myself… But you know… RIP… But Joe is pretty fine and my mom did always hope I'd marry a black man to get melanin back in our family… But I don't think a splash of melanin is gonna override this asian/african skin so… Anyways! So these guys come walking past our camp site, and we're all drunk and high so we're already all on edge upon seeing random men this deep into the forest, but friend Four gets up and says "who the fuck are you and what're you doing here!?" One of the men quickly apologizes and tells us they're actually out here camping as well. They said a friend of theirs found this waterfall in the forest that glows because it captures the moon's light. Friend Two hears this and asks if we can go with them, to which we all begrudgingly agree.
At the "mooncuzi" I like to call it, we all sit around this beautiful natural pool lit up by the moon, and we were worried it would be cold but I was surprisingly warm, if I had to guess I'd assume there's a magma vein under there or something? Idk, I'm not a geologist or volcanologist, but something kept it warm and it wasn't my tiny bladder! Everyone was really relaxed and the guys honestly seemed super cool, and guy One honestly seemed really nice. I call him guy One because he's number 1 to me, we're still together now, and we even have another partner now, so yay! We all began talking and some of us were hitting it off, clearly… but we had all been drinking and smoking more which, honestly we had stopped… but we couldn't pass up the opportunity to get cross-faded in a mooncuzi. Nuh. Nope. Not on my watch. But someone clearly didn't get the vibe memo, because friend Two screams out "bro what the fuck I said no!"
The next thing we hear is "You don't have to yell about it like some kind of cunt!" Everyone runs over to try and figure out what's going on. Turns out guy Five didn't like being told no. He and friend Two were playing a drinking game with friends Three and Four and guy Three and Four. We learned that guy Five dared friend Two to take her top off, to which she said politely refused, and the guys didn't seem to like that. They tried to convince her it's part of the game. One of the guys said she was already in her underwear anyway, so she might as well… My guy, One, and guy Two scolded their friends for their behavior, which is why guy Two and friend Two are married now… Guess nice guys don't finish last, huh? Anyways, They scolded their friends for their behavior, I remember my guy yelling "you never speak to a woman like that!" and "If I ever catch you trying to peer pressure a woman again I'll take your testicals in my hand and squeeze on them slowly until I know what it's like to feel one pop in my hand." and it was honestly the hottest thing I've ever heard a man say… a bit violent… but fuck was I glad I was in the water!
Guys One and Two apologized for their friends' actions the whole way back. I asked them why they remained friends with them and guy One had gone off to college while guy Two went into the service, so the two of them had been away for a few years, but they swore their friends never used to be like that. This was actually supposed to be a reunion hike of sorts since they both happened to come back around the same time. After meeting up with guys Three, Four, and Five though, they realized their friends had been warped by these podcasts about alphas and betas and maximizing your sigma or something, and tried to convince him to listen to some pickup artist that claimed to know the secret to unlocking the female brain. Also known as, stupid useless slop grifters make to get rich off young boys with zero confidence and zero bitches. Lastly, he tells me guy Three was actually raised by a single mother alongside his two sisters, so he really wouldn't expect that kind of behavior from him. Guy Four was always sort of sketchy but they thought he was "just being funny", men right? The only thing they felt was weird about him was this one time when they were teens his sister moved away and he got really quiet afterwards, but then he dated a few people that looked almost identical to her, but for some reason he didn't see it, so they started calling him "little sister" (or did they? oooo) or "Lil" for short, joking he had an undiagnosed sister complex… Ew. That’s all I’ll say to that. The last guy, Five, they said always seemed fine to them, they didn't elaborate, so idk what their idea of "fine" is, sorry to disappoint.
Not long after we got back to the camp we heard engines in the distance, and as they got closer and closer we all stared in confusion. No one should be riding vehicles out this way, and friend 6 knows her bf wouldn't come out here without alerting us.
The vehicles stopped after surrounding us with their lights pointing right at us. We heard the familiar voices of guy Three, along with 4 new voices. He whined about how we hyurt his widdle feefees or something obnoxious. I tried to listen but it's just so hard to listen to some overgrown pissbaby go on about their fragile ego. Guys One and Two went to confront guy Three and his posse, asking why they didn’t wait at the car. Guy Three told them they wouldn’t understand because they’ve given themselves over to feminist ideas and allowed themselves to become beta cucks. He told them that simps deserve to die so other men won’t be warped by feminist witch pussy magic like they have… Like we just met these guys and he’s already acting like we had sex… This man's logic was like a runaway train, the cars are all there but they ain’t making it to their destination. Guys One and Two continue to argue with guys Three, Four, and Five, before guys Six and seven come up behind them and put knives to their necks. At this moment I noticed a gleam in guy Three’s eyes. He now thinks he’s invincible… I can see the depravity in his eyes as he looks upon friend Two, stripping her down in his mind, imagining all the sick things he’ll do. And as if to validate my suspicions, he walks up to her and says “You never did complete that dare… How about we start a new game… But this time we won’t have any need for truths.” I watch as fear washes over Two’s face, as she begins to imagine what he is implying, almost as if his depraved thoughts were being projected into her mind, instilling suffering on her before he had even begun to touch her. She catches herself, refusing to give him the satisfaction of fear and spits in his face. She then tells him “you couldn’t even please your hand with a prick that small.” The look of anger on his face was honestly delectable. If I could, I would put it on canvas and call it “Portrait of a Scorned Man” or “Man who just realized being a dick doesn’t make yours bigger”. ANYWAYS, he then began to yell something about "it's up to real men to show women their place in society!" OOO so angwy! They started circling around us like starving wolves. One of them placed themselves against friend Five’s back and said "I always wondered if trans women looked different down there." Which angered friend Five, but not as much as it did friend Four who tends to be a bit of a hot head.
Friend Four may look like a pretty cute petite princess, but she's manlier than most men I know. She's a competitive marksman, as well as being a gymrat who likes to build cars on the weekends. She's also the girlfriend of friend Five, not that that’s important but I feel like it should be important. So anyways, she starts blasting right? And one of these guys yells "what the fuck they’ve got funs!? Who the fuck gave these stupid bitches guns!?" I then hear one of them try to antagonize her by saying "pretty young thang like you shouldn't be carrying such a big piece until she's used to it! AYO!" So she shot a round off at the tree he took shelter behind as if to mock him by letting him know his life is in her hands… She looked like a real boss bitch, like for real! That girl is HIM! She has always been him, she will always be him! While this was taking place, friend Six reached out to her boyfriend now that we could finally use the radio without fear of them taking it. We explained what was happening and asked him to bring help. He told us to tie the button down and to hide it from sight so that he could listen in while he headed to the station to get help. I feel so bad for that man, having to listen to all those screams, feeling completely powerless to do anything in the moment, but we’re so thankful to him for being there in the way that he was.
Gun fire kept ringing out as Four kept firing rounds into the forests yelling “I shoot to maim!” and “You’re not safe here!” hoping to scare the men enough to make them retreat because none of them seemed to have rifles on them… But then we hear it… The first scream… Everyone freezes in their tracks, their heart stilled by this sudden shriek of terror that seemed to only further race towards the all consuming darkness. The moment it stopped nothing remained but the slow encroaching crawl of raindrops and the rapid beating drums of the fear in our hearts. It's then that the rain came down like a closing curtain on the chapter of our innocence, because that’s when we heard the second scream, a scream just as chilling as the first, ascending high into the tree tops before we see something that shocks everyone to their core; the haunting image of a man’s face still screaming, a face still unaware its going to meet, a face that still hopes to be saved but never will. Within unison, as if hell had a chorus, we all screamed in silence as we turned to run. With no other means of safety, my friends, guys One and Two, as well as myself ran for the tent. We don't really know what happened after we got into the tent, but not a second went by that we didn't think we wouldn't be next. We know better now, but in that moment I felt both relief and fear for my life. I just kept thinking how lucky I was that I was fortunate enough to die with my dignity still intact… I kept thinking "at least those man babies didn't get to do whatever depravity they had in mind"
Well by now everyone knows what happened, it's been on the news. Those 3 guys and all of their cronies turned up missing… But what the news won't tell you is that we were saved by Mama Makwa, we call her that due to the sounds we heard, as well as the site we saw afterwards. The bellowing sound of vengeance that came in the form of a bear’s roar was as loud as the mean screaming they saw a 9 ft tall bear with skin dripping off of its bone like fur. We later learned that men referred to it as “Slippy Skin” aka "Wejuk", as it seemed the bear would change appearance depending on who gazed upon its visage, but this was not "Wejuk". One by one, we heard those men scream for their lives, describing a creature with a mouth made of human hands that had palms covered by teeth shaped like hypodermic needles. It had claws that seemed like stone daggers that were etched by The Ojibwe. The men warned each other "Don't look into its eyes!" before proclaiming how sorry they were for the things they'd done… They complained of the putrid stench suffocating them as they were pulled into its gaping maw. They screamed of the creatures rotting viscous flesh melting into their own, and making their skin a part of it, as if their skins were fuel for the fear this best could instill by its mere dominion over them. But we never saw that creature… Instead, after the screams stopped, we were greeted by this beautiful creature that looked like a bear, only it had this glow about it, and its fur seemed almost like the softest of opalescent feathers. Its eyes looked just like the aurora borealis, and she was mesmerizing. We felt safe, and welcomed, and most of all protected… After everything that happened, I think we will be coming back, because we know Mama Makwa will be there to protect us. We believe Mama Makwa is an avenging spirit born from the fear those lost daughters felt, here to make sure no other women ever have to suffer like they did within this forest. We also now understand why those men all went missing. My boyfriend and friend Two's husband weren't attacked by Mama Makwa… Only the men who felt any sort of ill intent toward us women that night saw Mama Makwa in that form, the form they confused for Slippy… But knowing there is a safe haven for women out there, I'm thinking we will have another girls night next year, anybody wanna come?