Heads up, this is more of a small rant but feel free to give your opinion on it. Also, this applies to a traditional 8 hour work day, not the exact 9 to 5 hours.
I continue to see “influencers” on TikTok (my first mistake I know) or other social medias talking down about 9 to 5 jobs like they are the absolute devil and the worst thing in the world. The video I just watched was this guy who was basically saying “why do people think 9 to 5s are normal? Work for 40 years to enjoy 10 years after??? I started working for myself and become financially free before 35! People called me crazy but if I can do it after being poor growing up anybody can!” And yes, he actually said that last part. To suggest 9 to 5 jobs are terrible for society and the people working them is mind blowing to me.
1) So many people decide to ditch the 9 to 5 and work for themself. Most of the time, that ends up involving considerably more time and effort than a traditional 9 to 5. Not to mention the loss of health coverage (in the US at least), paid time off, etc.
2) Why is this guy or others waiting until they retire to enjoy life? Can you not vacation, take weekend trips, relax during those 40 working years? I understand some people have 9 to 5s that don’t give PTO, but majority do. Every 9 to 5 I’ve had since I was 21 has given a minimum of 3 weeks PTO.
3) Structure is extremely important to life. A 9 to 5 gives that without really having to think about it. Some people really lack the ability to create structure for themselves. A 9 to 5 gives that life structure.
4) If people didn’t work 9 to 5, people like this guy wouldn’t be able to “be financially free at 35”. Want to eat? Sorry bud, those people working their 9 to 5 at the grocery quit to be a TikTok influencer, you now have to hunt your own food, herd your own cattle, and grow your own crops. Oh shit, you broke your leg? Well, sorry bud, that doctor decided to stop being a doctor because he didn’t want to be a 9 to 5 loser so your leg is going to get infected. You may lose your leg or die. Good luck!
5) Stability. Having a 9 to 5 ensures you will get a check, have paid time off, health benefits, etc.
Maybe I’m just brain washed, but I’ve lived that “fuck working for someone, let’s grind” and had my own business. It sucks. Hours suck, work dedication sucks, unpredictability sucks. Sleepless nights fixing issues, canceling trips, big business expenses. You name it.
Other people who have worked both a 9 to 5 as well as worked for yourself, what are your thoughts?
Sorry for the rant y’all

Did you know 97% of consumers search online to find a local business? And 64% of consumers check Google reviews before visiting a business? In the competitive world of shave ice and snow cone businesses, standing out online is crucial. One of the most effective ways to do this is by optimizing your Google reviews. In this guide, we’ll walk you through why Google reviews are important, how they impact your business, and practical strategies to get and respond to reviews. Let’s dive in!
Why Google Reviews Matter
First Impressions Matter Your Google Business Profile (GBP) is often the first interaction potential customers have with your business. It’s like a digital billboard showcasing who you are, what you do, and how you operate. Having a strong profile filled with positive reviews can significantly influence potential customers’ decisions.
Impact on Local SEO Google reviews play a significant role in local SEO. They affect your ranking in Google’s “Map Pack,” which displays local businesses based on proximity and relevance to the searcher. According to Daniel Wright, an expert in reputation management, 17% of how you rank in local searches is determined by your reviews, including their quantity, quality, and how often you receive them.
Building Trust and Credibility Reviews build trust and credibility. Nine out of ten people read reviews before choosing a business, and they spend an average of 15 minutes doing so. Positive reviews reassure potential customers that they’re making the right choice, while a well-managed response to negative reviews can show your commitment to customer service.
Setting Up and Optimizing Your Google Business Profile
Complete Your Profile Ensure your GBP is complete and accurate. Include essential information like your business name, address, phone number, operating hours, and a brief description of your services. Regularly update your profile to reflect any changes.
Add Photos and Videos Photos and videos can significantly enhance your profile. Businesses with photos and videos receive 35% more clicks. Add high-quality images of your products, storefront, and happy customers. Encourage customers to upload their photos too.
Strategies to Generate More Reviews
Just Ask Surprisingly, up to 70% of people are willing to leave a review if asked. Train your staff to ask for reviews, especially after a positive interaction. You can also include a reminder on receipts or follow-up emails.
Make It Easy Simplify the process for customers by providing a direct link to your Google review page. You can generate this link from your GBP and share it via email, SMS, or on your website.
Use QR Codes Display QR codes at your shop that customers can scan to leave a review. This makes the process quick and convenient, increasing the likelihood of them following through.
Employee Incentives Motivate your employees by setting up a review generation program. For example, if your team can collect a certain number of reviews in a week, reward them with a bonus or a team treat.
Responding to Reviews
Timely Responses Responding to reviews within 24 to 48 hours shows that you value customer feedback. Quick responses can improve customer perception and encourage more reviews.
Personalize Your Responses When responding to reviews, personalize your message. Thank customers for their feedback and mention specific details from their review. For example:

• Positive Review: “Thank you, [Customer Name], for your kind words! We’re thrilled to hear you loved our mango shave ice. We hope to see you again soon!”
• Negative Review: “We’re sorry to hear about your experience, [Customer Name]. This isn’t the standard we strive for. Please contact us at [Email/Phone] so we can make it right.”Include

Use Keywords Incorporate relevant keywords in your responses to boost SEO. For instance, if you’re located in Madison County, you might say, “Thank you for visiting the best shave ice spot in Madison County!”
Dealing with Negative Reviews
Stay Calm and Professional It’s essential to stay calm and professional when responding to negative reviews. Acknowledge the issue, apologize if necessary, and offer to resolve it offline. This demonstrates to potential customers that you care about resolving issues.
Learn from Feedback Negative reviews can provide valuable insights into areas where you can improve. Use this feedback constructively to enhance your business operations and customer service.
Leveraging Free Tools and Platforms
Google Business Profile Features Google provides several free tools to help you manage your reviews. For instance, you can generate a review link directly from your GBP. Explore these features and make the most of them before considering paid solutions.
POS Systems and Email Campaigns If you use a POS system like Square, you can use customer contact information to solicit reviews. Send follow-up emails or texts with the review link, making it easy for customers to leave feedback.
Final Thoughts Optimizing Google reviews for your shave ice business can significantly enhance your online presence, attract more customers, and boost your local SEO. Remember to keep your Google Business Profile updated, actively solicit reviews, and respond promptly and thoughtfully to customer feedback. By implementing these strategies, you’ll be well on your way to building a strong, trustworthy online reputation.
check out tropical sno blog for more fun shave ice info!

As with most things, the opinions expressed in this post are my own. Consider this as just one data point, and not as a guide to your career.
I've been working in the Data/AI space for 5 years now and I've seen hundreds of starry eyed people wanting to work in A.I. because they want to work with the latest and coolest cutting edge technology. But I want to share with you a few reasons why A.I. is not a good career choice.

1. A.I. positions could end up like the "data scientist" position. Looking at the history of the data scientist position, in 2010-2020, the hype around data science made it so that millions of people flocked to that position. Companies eventually realized that most them actually didn't need data science, and the impact of the position didn't always help them profit. The demand of the job has plummeted in recent years, leaving millions of aspiring data scientists unemployed or needing to pursue a different career.
2. A.I. positions will be less than .0001% of tech engineering jobs. In the next few decades, the demand for software and data engineering roles will be much more needed at most companies that A.I. roles. Only a small group companies will a be pursuing A.I. initiatives, while the majority of companies will still need software and data engineers. But because 90% of tech news is A.I. related, there will be a massive influx of people trying to enter the space.
3. The barriers to entry are huge. To pursue a career in A.I. and machine learning. A person's understanding of statistics and software engineering need to be extremely high. To get to that level of knowledge requires much more dedication and studying than most people imagine. Becoming a decent software engineer or data professional is already difficult for the average person.

Before you decide to pursue this as a career, it's important to consider some of the cons listed below. Perhaps consider taking a smaller step first and trying to land a job as a software engineer or data analyst. If you're already in a technical field, consider not putting all your eggs into one basket, and making sure you know enough skills to stay gainfully employed in the job market.
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I don't even know where to get started. I'm mainly writing to get everything off my chest in a community of folks who may or may not have had similar experiences in the past or present. I'd also like to add that creepy, unexplainable things have always happened around me since I was a little kid. So, here it goes:
I moved into my apartment in September 2023. I've always felt comfortable and calm in my home. Besides my usual nightmares (always had them, generally not too scary), everything was copacetic. Either at the very end of December or January 2024, things started getting weird.
It's important to note I live alone in a 1 bedroom apartment. The first time something happened, I was sound asleep and was awoken to 3 knocks on my bedroom door at 3 am. I usually slept with the bedroom door open and just started closing it at night. It was loud and deliberate. I just told myself I'd imagined it and while I was very scared, I drifted back off to sleep. The next day I was on the phone with my sister and told her what happened. Out of curiosity I knocked on my bedroom door and it was the exact same sound.
Over the next few months I heard 3 knocks at my bedroom door, bathroom, or front door around 3 am, 1 am, or 11 pm. I even had a friend visit in March and he was awoken to 3 knocks at the front door at 1 am. Around this time is the first time I heard my daughter's 7-8 year old voice say "Mom?" next to my bed then again a couple weeks later behind me at the head of the bed. My daughter is 12 and lives full time with her dad, so I knew and told myself "that isn't my daughter". I also expierenced what sounded like claw scratches across my stand up heater across each metal section (looks like a radiator) when I was fully awake laying down in bed. Another time I was in bed and for a couple seconds smelt sulfur next to my bed and got up and left my bedroom. After this I took my first actions.
I have a favorite tarot readepsychic I found on (a popular social media app I can't type because it isn't allowed) last year when he was first starting out doing free readings. I was on his live the night after hearing my daughter and asked him and the 13 other people in the live for advice. Him and a few people suggested burning sage (I cannot because it would set off the smoke alarms in the building). Next suggested using sage incense, making loud claps all over the apartment, in the nooks and crannies, to break up energy and get it moving throughout the apartment. Lastly, to open a window and ask whatevewhoever is they to please leave through that designated window. I couldn't find sage incense at Walmart so I got a plug in wax warmer and picked up palo santo/sage wax melts. I went home and did the ritual and I didn't have disturbances for 3 weeks.
During this time, I started leaving the bathroom light on with the door cracked, the bedroom door cracked, and the kitchen light on in the kitchen every night and slept with my winter hat with the top open for my hair as a face mask. Cut to Sunday night, I was woken up to the sound of wooden "pop!" hit the floor, like a staff or the wooden end of a broomstick next to my bed. I thought it was time to get up to go over to get my daughter up for school, but noticed it was completely dark outside. I had my hat over my eyes and told myself to stay calm and rolled over to pretend like I went back to sleep. A few minutes pass and I hear it again and this time feel the vibration on the floor (I sleep on an air mattress on the floor). I ignore it, then it happens 2 times in a row, I keep ignoring it, then it happens another 2 or 3 times in a row. I jump up and say "fuck this shit!" and dash to my living room, grab my purse, shoes, and leave my phone. When I got to the bottom floor I noticed it was 12:15 am. I slept over at my ex-fiances on the couch because I was so scared.
I go back to my apartment Monday night and start hearing a loud wooden "pop!" noise like when a house settles, but live in a concrete building and never heard it before. I was on the phone with a friend until midnight and kept hearing the loud crack/pop noise in the bedroom, kitchen, bathroom every 5-10 minutes for around 2 hours. I fell asleep on my papazon chair (ouch) because I was nervous about sleeping in my bedroom again and was woken to another pop at 2 am. I decided to just bite the bullet and fell asleep on my bed, but woke up every half hour or so, but no disturbances that I noticed. I left my apartment at 5:50 to get my daughter up.
I get back home at about 7am and decide I needed to take a nap from not getting a lot of sleep the last couple days and doze off at about 8 am. I was awoken at about 9 am to what sounded like a loud flick against the air mattress and I felt it, said "nope" and went to lay down (in a ball) on the papzon chair. I was woken up to the loud flick of the air mattress twice, then was awake and heard it again (like flick and air mattress moved). I decided I was leaving, packed up, wen to the bathroom and heard the same sound of the air mattress moving, got in my car and drove to my Dad's a hour in a half away, in part to see him, but mostly to get away from my apartment.
I'm still here now. I've told this all to my friend, sister, and Dad every step of the way and yesterday my therapist and peer support in detail. I'm nervous about being back at my apartment. I have so much fear in my heart and am just scared. I checked with my apartment manager today and no one has died in my apartment in the past. I called a local Catholic Church and left a voicemail with a preist to call me for guidance and hopefully meet up and discuss coming to my apartment with me. I have always been non-religous, but am open to anything at this point.
It's worth noting that I was having horrible, disgusting, wicked thoughts that were so bad I cannot tell anyone what they are because I don't want to be arrested when the disturbances started escalating.
Has anyone had similar experiences? How did you get them to stop? Do you now feel safe and secure in your home? Are you still living with (whatever) today?
Edit: I will not be checking this post while I'm at my apartment so fear of stirring up whatever is there. So my responses might be far between.

I am a third-year USMD who took Step 1 on 4/19 after a 5-week dedicated period. Technically, I studied for 7 weeks since I started watching Sketchy Micro and Pathoma during the last two weeks of preclinicals when we were in our last and easiest block.
Per my title, I repeated my first year of medical school after experiencing academic and personal challenges. I was originally part of the class of 2025 but transitioned to the class of 2026 after a few course and remediation exam failures. Honestly, before I joined my current cohort, I was a horrible student with a very poor and fixed mindset - most of my grades were borderline passing, I had pretty much given up, and I was convinced that I was only capable of doing the absolute bare minimum in medical school. When my school told me I had to repeat, I was terrified and unsure if I would even make it out of MS1 the second time around, but was also determined to make the most out of this fresh start and build a strong content foundation which I had failed to do the first time. Over the next two years, I used a consistent study plan for all of my blocks which I not only passed, but excelled in including the ones I had failed previously. I also adopted a growth mindset and healthy coping mechanisms for stress and anxiety, and had a strong support system consisting of family, friends, upperclassmen who also repeated or had their own academic struggles, faculty, classmates, and a free therapist from my school.
Today, two years after I received the devastating news that I would have to start medical school over from the very beginning, my hard work finally paid off when I got the long-coveted P yesterday. Dedicated was not easy - there were several times when I felt hopeless and like I would fail especially given my previous academic history. Additionally, even though my academic performance improved significantly with me getting only 80s and 90s after I repeated, my classmates were so smart that rankings-wise, I was still a pretty average student with my grades usually around the class average - sometimes a little more, sometimes a little less. Ultimately, a consistent study plan tailored to my strengths and what worked for me during preclinicals helped me overcome my worries and conquer this beast of an exam.
I realize that this post is getting pretty long now, so below I will quickly outline my resources, scores, and timeline:
UWorld: 24% complete with 60% average - this was after I reset UWorld which I had used in preclinicals. I also only did 1 block of 40 questions a day except on days when I took NBMEs because I took a long time to thoroughly review my blocks. I tried to do 2 blocks once and was completely burnt out afterwards so I stuck to only 1 block per day moving forward. All of my blocks were timed and random which I feel exposed me to many high-yield concepts and helped me with pacing.
Anki: I did the Pepper Sketchy Micro and Pharm decks during the first 3ish weeks of dedicated but eventually stopped. I also made my own Anki cards from my UWorld incorrect and "unsures" (questions I had answered correctly but didn't know why or completely understand) and did these cards every day until my exam.
Resources: First Aid - Read all sections concurrently with UWorld and Anki.
Boards and Beyond - Watched videos on weaknesses that I identified from UWorld.
Mehlman arrows and risk factor PDF documents - Only used these toward the end of dedicated once I had completed content review to further reinforce concepts.
NBME high-yield images - Only looked at these the day before my exam.
Having a good foundation from preclinicals after I repeated also really helped make dedicated more doable.
Scores: School-sponsored diagnostic CBSE (early March 2024) = 58
NBME 26 (3/23) = 61
NBME 28 (3/30) = 61 - This freaked me out so I started revisiting concepts I had already reviewed, but that I had not completely mastered, alongside new content review.
NBME 29 (4/6) = 70 - I attribute this big score jump to starting the above strategy. I used FA and B&B for this.
NBME 31 (4/13) = 73
NBME 30 (4/16) = 76
New Free 120 (4/17) = 77% correct
Real deal (4/19) = PASS!!! I felt confident and ready to take the exam after seeing an upward trend in my NBME scores and consistently getting scores within passing range. The exam itself was similar to NBMEs and free 120 and I was able to finish all my blocks with about 10 min left which I used to review my answers. Trust your NBMEs and don't worry too much about your UWorld %!!!
I'm sorry that this post is so long, but I wanted to share my experience with Step 1 and what helped me get the P especially since this subreddit was a huge help for me during dedicated. I also hope that my story serves as encouragement for other students who have either repeated a year or experienced any kind of academic difficulty. Please don't give up - you are not alone and do have what it takes to pass Step 1!!! ♥️
Congrats to everyone who also passed, and for those who didn't, you are still amazing and deserve to be here.

After spending hundreds of hours in the game I think I can confidently say I know what I wished the game did more of or better. Don't get me wrong, I love this game and I played it for so long but the more I just feel like there's more that could've been done. Dragon's dogma is the only game of it's like. Sure you can say it's similar to this and this but nothing really scratches that itch that dragons dogma does. I love a lot of the decisions they made with the game and the world but I'm not blind to it's flaws either. Most of the things I'll talk about has been said a million times but it really can't be understated how much more they could've done.
Gameplay
Like I said up in that paragraph no other game really scratches the itch that dragon's dogma does. Combat alone was a big selling point for me because where else will you get an ARPG where the combat feels nice and weighty without it being clunky and or it being too light and feeling more like a hack and slash combo game. It too me hits that perfect itch of being realistic but also fantasy. My only gripe with it is that it feels like a high fantasy game trying to be a dark fantasy game. It's more of a tone thing but in a world where people are able to cast meteors and tornados and jump 10 meters into the air and become a spinning ball of death the enemies you face are just grounded goblins and monsters. I feel like it's trying to be two things at once leading too the classes feeling just kind of mismatched. compare the gameplay of fighter to thief. Two close quarters classes and starting out they feel like they're on the same level somewhat but as you progress fighter just kind of remains the same while thief is over here causing explosions and flying around everywhere despite them starting on equal grounds. A more jarring example is mystic spearhand the "anime vocation" you can teleport around send out magic waves and stun enemies with a magic chargeable bolt. I have no problems with spear hand but to go from fighter a pretty grounded gameplay style to mystic spearhand where I feel like I'm playing DMC it's just kinda jarring. I like that the vocations feel unique don't get me wrong but it really just does feel weird to be a really normal guy swinging a sword around to teleporting everywhere and becoming invincible exploding man. Other than that I don't really have much else to say about the combat besides game difficulty really does affect combat a lot. As much as I like the combat even I can agree that it gets stale killing everything in 2-3 hits with no real danger. I still remember my first ogre fight since it was the first and only tough battle I had after that the game was a cake walk and I quickly shut my brain off for the majority of it.
Exploration
the world of dragons dogma is fucking beautiful. Sometimes I just walk around admiring the world they made, seeing the trees and grass sway with the wind as oxcarts and patrolling knights walk past. The only thing that can ruin it is oh right an enemy encounter every 3 mins. I Love the combat but fuck, combat every 3 mins when I just want to explore and see the world can get tiresome and just lessens the encounters to be mind numbing button mashing. not only does it lessen the combat system by just giving you too much of it but it ruins exploration by making the world feels smaller. The world is so fucking beautiful but if the only thing you really see or interact with is combat after combat you stop focusing on the world and you just look at the same goblins and lizards. One video I've been watching a lot is a dragons dogma 2 relaxing ambient music where they have scenes of the world just existing. You forget how beautiful the world that capcom created actually is because every 3 mins you just fight goblins. Just that open field of wheat outside of vernworth can give you like 50 beautiful screenshots of the world. I really wish there was a mod that would either lower enemy population count or get rid of half the enemy placements in the world because I really do just want to explore and take in the world. Another problem that DD2 has with exploration is that all the armors and weapons are in the shops. After realizing this halfway through the game I just lost like 50% of my desire to fully explore the game. If all the cool armor and weapons can just be bought what's the reason to explore caves and dungeons and complete quests? I get why they did this because if you're a thief and a quest reward or a random dungeon chest is a warrior armor then you pretty much just wasted time to get loot that doesn't match your vocation but having it all in the shop just ruins so much of the game's exploration and quests. Also if you want to start a new game I recommend you download a mod called "wild loot" on nexus. It takes all the items in the shops and just does what it says, places it into the wild. Whenever I found a cool new armor or weapon I'm always interested to see how big a difference it made rather than just buying the best set in the store.
World
I just wish there was more world building and lore to the world to explain stuff for those that truly want to know about the world. Like why don't we have the misty marshes be explained as "A long time ago a litch showed up and that's why theres so many undead and an uneazy fog around it" and if you keep exploring you can find out that oooooo the old villagers executed a wizard or priest for some reason and they placed a curse on the local area to be an undead area. I wish there were more biomes too, like wide open plains or snowy mountains. Imagine climbing a snowy mountain at night being lost in the snow storm only to see a bright yellow light off in the distant and seeing a tiny little cozy mountain village. seeing different architecture and culture from the giant stone fortress that is vernworth. Some kind of nordic (cheesy I know) wooden mead hall and all with people wearing heavy layering of furs of the loacal animals. Magic also just feels kinda out of place too. Maybe these ideas are cheesy but you're telling me that magic where you can summon litteral meteors wouldn't affect the world even a little bit? There wouldn't be some kind of magic school that teaches young mages to control such volatile and destructive magic? This brings me back to the whole "Low fantasy" trying to be "High fantasy" The world just needs more to feel alive. Like what if the elven village was more than just three circles connected to each other and instead you're able to walk up through mountain edges and actually see the elven houses up on the cliffs that you couldn't reach. There's dwarves in the game but they have no impact to the world at all. They don't even have their own place or history. You won't go down a cave and find yourself in a abandoned dwarven mine like moria and find a dragon hoarding a secret vault of treasures like a cool magical armor or weapon. It lack world building to add context to why the world is the way that it is. Things just are in this world. The original DD wasn't perfect but it tries to add context to the world, It really just needs to bake the world more.
Story
I'll keep this short we all know the story sucks, only thing I can say is, make the story about you and the pawn. We like our pawns more anyways. Make it about exploring what free will is and if pawns are even alive or something, just make us connect with our pawn. Add more scenes and flesh out the characters more. Just do better that's it. Also add more RPG mechanics. Honestly, just mix Bethesda rpg and dragons dogma and it's a perfect game for me.
Pawns
I love the pawn systems. I have my gripes with it but the main thing I want is for more pawn interaction. The only meaningful interaction is them showing you the way, the dap, and dual casting. Like why don't we have team attacks in in ff15? they tried to do it a bit with the ability to launch pawns but its lack luster and barely works. Imagine how cool it would be if you could coordinate with your archer pawn to launch them over the enemy and do a flip while raining arrows down on the enemy. Or if you're a sorcerer and have a warrior pawn that gives you a cool fist bump before taking a giant swing at a charging minotaur causing it to fall down while you have charge up a quick magic spell for a quick follow up attack. Just more interactions would've been so cool especially in combat.
Overall I loved dragons dogma. I wished it did more but it's one of my favorite games. Wish there were more games like this.

So the 1 day deal on the 2300 psi Bauer pressure washer is pretty sweet, $50 off. Can't complain about that and I didn't want it to get away so at lunch I dropped by and picked one up.
I just got home (at about 3:30 pm CDT) from running errands and what do I see on my phone? A coupon for a free foam cannon with the purchase.
UGH - so now I have to make another trip to HF, putting my wallet and budget in jeopardy, just to get a free foam cannon.
Why couldn't they have just put out that coupon at the same time?!
Ok Ok I get it....first world problems.
I know it's silly to be upset by this but my schedule for lazing around today has been rudely interrupted. Fallout isn't gonna watch itself....just sayin.

hello there.
as name suggested, been looking onto new trail running backpack and i ve narrowed down to two options

• osprey duro 6: https://www.osprey.com/gb/osprey-duro-6-s22
• camelback zepyhre: https://www.camelbak.com/shop/packs/running/zephyr-pro-vest-with-two-17oz-quick-stow-flasks/CB-2820.html

i'm looking onto these two because i can test them both in store and prices re also nice. for now i don't have other options soo one of these two.
i'm more onto osprey side here, it just looks like better desinged backpack but i'm just little afraid 6l might become too little on my solo 30km runs when i can refill water only once on lets say 20km mark (as example): t-shirt, jacket, packet of tissues, at least 1,5l or 2,5l water (two flasks and 1,5l reservoir on back, can definently buy only 1l if needed), 1st aid kit, headlamp, food like chocolate bars, crosiant, etc. and ofc phone, keys and maybe a wallet.
for any other reccomedation of other backpacks (excluding salomon ones since i'm not gonna risk with that brand again - way more dissapoitments rather than good purchases) fell free to suggest but in my country options re limited and only place i know to buy online is amazon de.

Everything is spiraling out of control. I’m a stay at home mom with a 4 year old son and a 1 year old son… 4 year old caught the stomach flu last Sunday (almost two weeks ago). Luckily my ex and I have a good relationship and even though I was supposed to pick my son up, he kept him for the next few days to take care of him. He came home on Wednesday completely symptom-free… but I KNEW he was still contagious. A FULL week later, my 1 year old caught it. He has been v* for almost 4 days now.
I am in therapy, but still in the early stages. Not much improvement yet, and I won’t see my therapist for another week because he is on vacation. I had the worst meltdown I have ever had. I haven’t eaten in four days. Barely drinking water because I’m terrified that I touch the water bottle caps and then the virus is on the cap. I can’t really do open cups because of the baby. Any time the baby even touches my water bottle, I throw it out. Ive been trying not to leave my bed and I’ve changed the sheets 8 times now. I have been taking zofran but I try not to take it too much because it gives me bad constipation. I took Xanax two nights in a row and my fiance has had to come home from work twice, even though he still has to work from home.
I am not ok. I had a little bit of soup and bread earlier which helped a little, but now I have severe body aches. I think it may be related to the Xanax but I’m not sure… I’ve never taken Xanax before and only had it prescribed for these extreme moments. But the aches are so bad and feel very flu-like.
I feel like the world’s worst mother. I sent my 4 year old to stay with grandma, and I can barely touch my 1 year old because I am so afraid of catching what he has. I have been showering multiple times a day and my hands look like they are made out of leather and hurt so bad from how dry they are because I wash my hands any time I touch literally anything in the house.
The emotional pain is unbearable. I am failing my children. I can’t stop crying. I don’t want to take Xanax again especially if these body aches are from the Xanax.
Oh, on top of it all, my fiance spent $10,000 on a special weekend trip for just the two of us that we have been planning for an entire year (non-refundable) and I am so terrified to even leave the house because I don’t want to be away from home and all of a sudden get sick from this virus. I don’t know what to do. I’ve told him I don’t want to go but I can see the sadness in his face even when he says “Please go. It’s going to be ok, but I also want to make sure you’re ok, too.” I know he is getting so backed up with work from having to come home to take the baby from me. He is hiding his stress so well and I feel so guilty. I can barely function. I don’t know what to do. I keep telling myself “Neither of the boys’ dads got sick you and they are not obsessively washing themselves like you are, you are going to be ok.” But also, I am the one who cleans up all of the sick because I feel I am the only one who will do a thorough enough job… so really, I’m exposed to it the most. What do I do? Do I risk going on this trip? How do I get out of this emotional pain? I’ve never had an episode this bad. I am completely lost. People don’t understand the pain we go through. It’s the worst pain. It truly is.

Hello! Just as the name suggests, I’m looking for someone to roleplay with! Before messaging me, I would like it if you could read through. Let me start off by introducing myself, and telling you about myself so you get a good idea of who I am, and if that doesn’t scare you off then great!
My name is Euphie or Ras, whichever is fine, I’ve been roleplaying for several years and even aspire to write a book at some point. I work, have a spouse, and I also do a lot of gaming, anime watching and binging. Roleplay wise: I am comfortable doubling up, playing male and female roles, I have diverse characters (they’re all not mary sues) and I’m big on communicating with my partner. I can do semi-literate to literate, and be able to match what my partner gives. I do not mind playing Canon character’s, it’s not my strong point but I’m down to try anything. Just so I know you have read through this properly; tell me what is the capital of Hawaii?
What I’m looking for; I’ll try to keep this simple. I do require a few things from my partner if they are to RP with me but they’re not too bad.
1.) Please be older than 21. I’m older than 25, it’s a bit weird for me.
2.) Be comfortable playing Male Roles and or Doubling up. I like to play both genders; but I’m still rusty when it comes to being a man. Most of my men are morally gray buttheads anyways.
3.) Communicate. This is my biggest thing. I’ve had people ghost me a lot, or suddenly change their mind when they realized I’m not 24/7 waiting to talk to them. I’ve also had people drop me over little misunderstandings. Just to let you know, I will likely ask you multiple times for clarification.
4.) GOOGLE DOC/Discord. I only roleplay through Google Doc, I try not to use Discord a lot but for the right moment I will heavily contemplate it!
I am looking for several things. * is how I will rate how badly I’m wanting it. *** is the most.
Fandoms:
***Baldur’s Gate 3 / OC x Canon / Either; Gale, Astarion or Halsin: I have a vague idea for this, I would be willing to double and play whoever.
**Harry Potter / OC x Canon / Draco Malfoy - Again, I can play whoever for you, I have a storyline for this.
*** Call Of Duty / OC x Canon / Either; Soap MacTavish, Alejandro Vargas. Same as before.
*** Bridgerton - The new season is coming and I am heavily excited for it. So, anything themed. Prefer double up and maybe OC x OC.
Tropes:
NOTE: Do not come into my DMs wanting....more than just RP.
***Second Chance: MC1 and MC2 dated for years until one day MC1 left town, never to be heard from again, MC2 moved on and eventually either a funeral or a wedding happens and MC1 is back in town many years later. I have a plot for this. I’VE BEEN WANTING FOR LIKE EVER to roleplay this.
** Best Friends Brother - MC3 is MC2’s best friend, and grew up together. MC3 is MC2’s brother who went off to the military after graduating High School. MC1 has not needed MC3 since they graduated highschool nearly 10 years ago.
*** The One Night Stand - After a fling, both character’s go separate ways. MC1s family is hosting an event (maybe they’re rich or own a company), only to be reintroduced to MC2 who is investing into MC1’s family's business or whatever.
** Fake It - MC1 needs to marry someone in order to maintain their social status AND MC2 is struggling financially to help their family , so MC1 devises a plan to fake marry MC2 and in return, MC1 will help MC2s family.
I’m also open to fantasy related things like:
Arranged Marriages. Princess x Knight. Demon x Priest/Priestess.
Feel free to DM me if you have any ideas!

DANCING WITH THE STARS: THE PROS' MOST ICONIC QUOTES ✨

Day	Pro Dancer	Quote
1	Karina Smirnoff	"Is there any reason why your head looks like a pigeon?"
2	Valentin Chmerkovskiy	"Bro, you're one big wrong already."
3	Witney Carson	"What do you need, a snack?"
4	Anna Trebunskaya	"Some people say I'm a tough teacher. And I am."
5	Brandon Armstrong	"I was born in '94..."
6	Cheryl Burke	"So the name of the song is 'Call Me Irresponsible', remind you of anybody? I think it's perfect for you!"
7	Edyta Śliwińska	"I'm wearing so much clothes that I got tangled in it!"
8	Artem Chigvintsev	"Fine! I watched 'Fifty Shades of Grey'!"
9	Corky Ballas	"Now we're doing the Mambo which originated in the '40s!"...
10	Chelsie Hightower	"South America speaks Spanish?"
11	Derek Hough	"I'm rough, I'm tough, I'm Derek Hough."
12	Charlotte Jørgensen	"Get your heel up on your back foot, or I'll kill you."
13	Allison Holker	"Team Rallison!!!"
14	Julianne Hough	"I felt like you just had to phone it in so you could get back with Meryl."
15	Alec Mazo	"Josie is deceptively unfit."
16	Alan Bersten	"It's a little shaky in here!"
17	Jenna Johnson	"ADAM! WE GOTTA QUICKSTEP!!!"
18	Ashly DelGrosso-Costa	"It needs to be equal teamwork, and I can't play a tug-of-war anymore."
19	Gleb Savchenko	"You look like a dancer when you're not moving."
20	Kym Johnson-Herjavec	"I should never have made us try that stupid lift..."
21	Maksim Chmerkovskiy	"With all due respect, this is my show, I help make it what it is."
22	Lacey Schwimmer	"STEVE!!! How am I supposed to be in love with you if you keep farting all the time?!?!"
23	Mark Ballas	“And you said habede habeduh de de. Daba da dip bah da be. That’s what you said when I asked you."
24	Lindsay Arnold	"That salsa will get ya-every time!"
25	Louis Van Amstel	"I was jealous of Mark on Season 5, but I got the girl now!"
26	Koko Iwasaki	"You're a real Jersey party boy, and I need you to be a suave English gentleman for Bond Night."
27	Keo Motsepe	"If Len gives a 10, I'm gonna run down and kiss him!"
28	Peta Murgatroyd	Her scream after finding out that she and Tommy Chong had made the semi-finals.
29	Pasha Pashkov	"You don't know who I am, but I've been praying I get you!"
30	Sasha Farber	"If you wanna dance, you know it would be my honour. My main worrybis your health."
31	Jonathan Roberts	"Let's take a commercial break."
32	Daniella Karagach	"YEAH! OH SHIT!!!"
33	Dmitry Chaplin	"I feel like I'm cheating on Jewel with another partner."
34	Sharna Burgess	"I got to do the Backstreet Boys' move next to a Backstreet Boy, and I think it's kinda awesome!"
35	Tristan MacManus	"And I got a 7. Hurt my feelins!"
36	Britt Stewart	"Daniel!"
37	Rylee Arnold	"Isn't that James Bond, not James Brown?"
38	Tony Dovolani
39	Emma Slater

Welcome to DANCING WITH THE STARS: THE PROS' MOST ICONIC QUOTES ✨

A huge thank you to the lovely u/invader_holly who suggested the idea, and that I run this game here! 💕
How does it work?
Each day, I'll reshare this board. With each day is a new pro. Similarly to past games I've done like Dances of the Seasons, The Dancing with the Stars Alphabet, Favourite Dances Per Style, and The Pros' Most Memorable Dances, for every day, you can all comment a response. This time, the response would be a quote from the respective pro for that day! As with previous games, the comment with the most upvotes wins. At the end, I'll put together a video compilation together!
MAKE SURE THAT IF YOU WANT TO SUGGEST NUMEROUS QUOTES, DO THEM EACH IN A SEPERATE COMMENT. THE COMMENT WITH THE MOST UPVOTES WINS AND IS ADDED TO THE BOARD. IF POSSIBLE, PLEASE TRY AND ADD WHEN THE PRO SAYS THE QUOTE (SO I CAN FIND THE CLIP TO ADD TO THE VIDEO COMPILATION).
Yesterday's round was won by u/Alarming-Butterfly90 's suggestion!

DAY 38: TONY DOVOLANI

There was once one writer, however he no longer had the inspiration for his stories like he had before, he would roam around days and nights in order to find his inspiration. He even started drinking.
Which obviously caused the feeling of emptiness inside him, so one afternoon he was just sitting in the bar feeling blue, but suddenly an older man approached him, the older man wore long and brown coat with hat, he walked with one black cane that was designed with silver skull. The older man told him that he knows him and how miserable he's become, and asked him if he can sit next to him and told him that he can help him, since that writer was in miserable crisis of finding his own passion, he trusted the older man and let him sit right next to him.
As the man sat down, he pulled his black bag, however he was a very mild person and his voice was also calm and relaxing, trusting such person like him is easy. He was searching something in his bag and spontaneously pulled out his old vintage typewriter, he told him how this vintage typewriter is extremely special, because whenever you write something with it, that story is guaranteed to be famous and people would purchase it even if it's very expensive.
Anyone who is in normal circumstances would believe that is some stupidity, but also anyone who is in such midlife crisis and desperate would also trust anything that is representing a modicum of hope for them.
The writer accepted his vintage typewriter but questioned him what usage would he have from this and why would he offer it to him for free, and the older man relied on his black cane, got up, sighted and replied how he simply just loves good stories, then he simply just turned around and left.
The writer then went to his apartment and placed the vintage typewriter on his table, he put the paper and started writing, and out of thin air the writer immediately got ideas what to write, points, characters, and he managed to think of good ending in split seconds, but he spent the entire night writing.
So when the story was done in the morning he was checking his story if there were any mistakes or etc, the story was about 24 people that were buried underground in the train, when the train was going through tunnel, the ground collapsed and the train ended up in the giant sinkhole, since they had no way of coming back, they were stuck for days, the point of the story was what would an average human be prepared to do in order to survive, out of stuck 24 people, only one of them got to see the sunlight, no one knew how he survived, except him, and he survived by not having mercy towards others.
While others were grabbing themselves by hair and panicking because of craziness, from the darkness, hunger, thirst, paranoia because they were stuck for 2 weeks, they had enough oxygen, but not food, so everyone was against each other.
At the end of the day he sent his story to his literary agent, the story was published and became really popular and commercially viable. But month after the story was published he spontaneously came across the shocking news on the newsletter about the incident with one train that happened that day, 23 people have died and only one has survived, while the saviors were getting that guy out, the writers hands were shaking as he observed that, and when he read the description about the man who survived, his heart almost stopped beating, the man who survived was utterly identical to the man who was in his story, and in the newsletters every minutiae about his story was identical.
He got up, drank a glass of whiskey, and tried to comprehend what he just read. While he started to search for logical explanations, he could hear from the other room his vintage typewriter spontaneously started to produce the clicking on paper sound, in other word writing with itself. Since he was sole one in his apartment, he had no idea who could be writing with it, so he went to that room to see and to his shock the machine was writing by itself, he only managed to read the first word, before he just out of blue fell and died.
The vintage typewriter still continued to write until it's done with it, it wrote this following text:

One writer who lacked inspiration has sold his soul to the satan for his success, satan blessed him with the machine and fulfilled how every story he writes shall witness a tremendous success. But what he didn't know, is how satan always arrives for his soul after fulfilled promise. Now the police shall find him dead, and the naive mortals shall think that he died of heart attack. Satan, always arrives for what belongs to him, the end, author: The satan himself. 

Policemen later found his dead body, however, the vintage machine just disappeared and was found by no one.

Pornography has caused countless people to be turned into victims of sexual violence. I know this fact isn’t news to anyone here but, I wanted to share my own story again to shed light on how much damage it can do to a porn addict’s mind, especially at a young age.
I was 13 when I met my first boyfriend, he was 14. I wanted to marry him. A boundary I set from the beginning was that I didn’t want to have sex until we married. He pressured me. Eventually, it escalated until he took my virginity by rape. I froze. I told myself it was a good experience despite the fact that I just laid there staring out my window at a full moon, while I suffered physical pain.
By the time we’d been seeing each other for 6 months, it escalated further. I was 14 now, he was 15. He made me watch porn with him. It made me feel really awkward and uncomfortable. He started asking me for more and more, and became really rough with me. He slapped me in the face until it bruised one night during sexual activity. I stopped and asked him why he was doing it, and he said “because you’re trash, you’re garbage”. He was so aggressive he made me vomit, then forced me to eat it. I don’t know why I allowed it. It got even worse over time. He kept hitting me. He started urinating on me, as this was a new thing to get him off. One day, after he did this, he told me to get in the shower. I was glad, I thought he’d clean me up and be nice to me since I did what he wanted. Instead, he turned the water on ICE COLD and made me stand in it. He was insanely sadistic. He eventually raped me again, taking my other virginity…
I had never been in a relationship before, and had no real family, so I thought these things were normal. Now, years later, I realize that he was just a child who was deeply damaged and disturbed due to porn. He may have even been a victim himself, but I was unfortunately his victim.
People seem to think porn is harmless, but I would have never experienced the horrors that I did without it. Porn created a monster, a predator, an abuser, and he was barely even a teenager.

[TRIGGER WARNING]
Hey everyone,
I'm reaching out to share something heavy on my heart. Yesterday, I lost my friend (22M) to heroin use. It's been a sudden and devastating loss, as he seemed perfectly fine until he took a turn for the worse on 27 April.
A bit of background: I'm 41M, and I have my own history of Crystal Meth use. I went to a Christian Rehab Centre in February 2022, where I met this new guy who arrived a few months later. I had a strange feeling that our paths were meant to cross for a reason, though I didn't know then how things would unfold. Unfortunately, he didn't complete the program and returned to street life.
Fast forward to November 2023, I decided to go out for a few drinks on my own to reintegrate into society, and I ran into him working as a car guard at a pub. We reconnected, grew close, and he opened up to me about his past struggles.
On 3 May, he was so weak that he couldn't walk, so I took him to the local hospital. There, we discovered his haemoglobin levels were dangerously low. Two days later, he shared with me that he was HIV positive (Stage 1) and suspected to have tuberculosis (Symptomatic). A few days after that, he passed away.
I've always felt a calling to help those less fortunate and battling drug abuse, but now I'm not so sure. I tend to get very emotionally attached and feel deeply empathetic, which makes me question if I'm suited for this cause. However, I want to give it a try in his memory. I'm considering starting a website or online community, but maybe I should start by supporting others one-on-one for now. If anyone needs someone to talk to, please feel free to send me a DM.
I'm also open to suggestions, especially from those who have experienced something similar or are recovered addicts. If anyone wants to partner up and work on an idea, please reach out.
Thank you for reading.

CW: Baby being harmed
I just had a kid a few months ago and watching him at night on his baby monitor reminded me of a short film I saw maybe 10 years ago.
It took place in one room, I think a kitchen, and may have been a single shot. A dad was listening to his baby monitor and we hear the baby start crying followed by a woman singing him a lullaby, I think Mama's Gonna Buy You a Mockingbird. After a few seconds, his wife enters the kitchen, and he realizes that the voice on the baby monitor singing isn't hers. The lullaby's lyrics become violent and the baby starts crying. The parents rush off screen as the camera slowly zooms in on the baby monitor. Through it, we hear the parents enter the room and start crying and screaming "no!", and that's the end.
In trying to find it, I came across The Lullaby: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAL-ZrUs910 This is remarkably similar in its premise, but I'm 100% sure it isn't it. The setting is different and the ending is very different, and it's too new. I wouldn't be surprised if this short was inspired by the one I'm thinking of, though.

I feel like I need to get this off my chest. Potential trigger warning
My first pregnancy, one of my first symptoms was intense fear. I was scared of the dark and was convinced a demon was watching me. Sometimes I’d think I’d see something and my heart pounded throughout the night. I spent my nights going between opening and closing my eyes until finally the sun rose and I could sleep.
I struggled with suicidal thoughts as well which felt more intense during pregnancy and postpartum.
However postpartum wasn’t so bad, thankfully. However when I gave birth to my child and saw her for the first time, I wasn’t happy. I was shocked. There was no way that could’ve been my child. I smiled anyways and took her. When the doctors were gone, i asked my husband many times if he was absolutely sure this baby was the same baby that came from my body. She was and if I compare my pictures from being a child to hers, she is my exact image. For the first year, I had no bond with her. No love that I felt a parent should have. She’s 6 now though and that has changed immensely. I love her more and more the older she gets and am proud of who she is becoming.
Then I was pregnant with baby number two. Symptoms of paranoia and delusions started quickly, but I didn’t recognize them as such. I just knew I had an intense fear and conviction that someone was watching me or in my house and they were going to kill me and take my daughter. My husband worked nights and I’d lock my daughter and myself in my room until he got home. I’d stare under the door for any shadows that might pass by. When my husband got home, I’d ask him to check the house every night. Sometimes multiple times. I’d even run the shower because I figured if someone was using heat vision to see inside my house, this would throw them off. I kept my curtains closed and taped aluminum foil over the windows without curtains. This lasted my entire pregnancy and I didn’t realize this wasn’t normal. To me, this was normal.
Postpartum: when this baby was born, there was an immediate bond. I knew this was my child, without a doubt, and yet strangely he looked nothing like me. PPD depression set in during the hospital which I expected. I also expected the anxiety. I cried. A lot.
Then finally we went home.
The depression got worse and I’d have moments where I felt fine and the next I’d be crying again. I didn’t think I could take care of my kids. I begged my husband to take more time off work, and he did, unpaid, but eventually he had to go back.
While he was at work, I was having a crying episode and went to the bathroom away from my kids. Everything shifted. A voice was telling me I was alone and I knew it wasn’t my voice. Immediately afterwards, thoughts of harming myself and my children came. In my mind, I couldn’t take care of them, but if I did this, we’d all be in heaven and we’d be safe.
The thoughts became stronger and I didn’t think I could get help because I was scared of losing my children. I tried talking to a couple people about, but I was blown off.
I had delusions that someone was trying to take my children and theyd be safer not on this earth. I also had delusions that my baby was possessed and would try to take my life. At one point, I remember waking up at night, thinking I saw them in the crib next to my bed staring at me with malicious intent. But my eyes were playing tricks - the baby was sleeping.
Eventually, my husband and I made sure I was never alone. I couldn’t trust myself with my own kids. It was the scariest time of my life. He’d have friends check on me, he’d take me and the kids to his work. If he couldn’t do that, then we’d stay on the phone until he got home. Eventually the delusions went away, I even lost friends during this because they told me “something was wrong” and I wasn’t acting like myself.
The depression and anxiety lasted for the next year and a half, but eventually I was able to feel a resemblance of normal.
Now we are expecting our third and this will be our final. Mentally, I’ve been doing great until a week ago. I realized I was having minor delusions. I thought my medicine for morning sickness was slowly killing me and i had convinced myself a specific spider was going to come after me if I didn’t research into it. After losing sleep over it, I recognized that this was a delusion, albeit a minor one. I laughed at myself but I know how bad it can get. Then the other night I had a violent nightmare. In my dream, my children were possessed and it ended horribly. I had to save them in my dream but in the worst way. It reminded me of how I felt postpartum with my last child. When I woke up, I spent the entire day in a fog, wondering if free will even exists and if my children are safe with me. I hugged my children when they woke and then my husband took them out and spent the day with them while I rested.
But things are different now. I will see a doctor and I’m going to be more open about my issues. I’m going to have a plan in place in case I mentally go on a downward spiral. To say I’m scared of going through again what I did with my previous child is an understatement. I’m terrified and I’m hoping it doesn’t get like that again, but I won’t take chances.

I receive lots of emails, and I have to send a personalized Google doc to each one of the senders. I was using Pigeon CRM to generate the Google doc with one click, but now it's been discontinued. It was able to generate Google doc personalised automatically with the merge tags I saved in Pigeon's right sidebar on Gmail.
Here is how it works: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VcmN4giRss
With the same tool I was also able to reply to each email with a message personalized from a template,or even with a full sequence, as you can see here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0f7hofYnqSM
I haven't found a valid alternative to automate this CRM for Gmail, nothing is even close, and now I am wasting countless hours in these repetitive tasks.
If you have any suggestion, paid or free, please comment here. So far a developer asked me $5k to develop something like that, but that's way out of my budhet.
I can tinker with Google scripts if needed, but I am no coder.

My apologies in advance if this is long. I was in an abusive relationship/marriage for 23 years. This incident happened when we were still friends. If I had I only known the truth when this had originally happened, I would have been saved from decades of emotional, psychological, verbal, physical, sexual, and physical abuse. (And currently post-separation abuse).
The cast: me, my ex Bub (Beelzebub), my ex-crush B, Bub's gf M, Bub's bf V (It will make sense when you read it.)
TW: Suicide, self-harm, abuse
We met through a mutual friend. We became really close really quickly. He was 17 and I was 19. We would talk for hours about anything and everything. I was raised around domestic abuse, and my family was highly dysfunctional. I suffered severe trauma as a child being raised in this environment with an abusive father and brother. (His namesake). By the time I met Bub, I had been having mental health struggles for many years. To deal with the trauma I still suffered from I would self-harm by cutting frequently. I also had been in a psychiatric hospital twice for suicide attempts. I told Bub about all of this, and he knew that I still did it. He was very supportive and would get really sad when I harmed myself.
Since we were just friends we would talk about our crushes. He had a crush on a girl from high school and I had a crush on one of my ex's B, who was also my high school crush. We only dated for 3 weeks, and we decided we were better as friends then lovers. Though we did have a FWB thing going on when we were both single. He really talked up his crush and I really talked up mine.
Two months into our friendship he got a gf. He told me she was a girl he knew from his home city named M. He claimed her mother would babysit him and his brother. He really talked this girl up. She was into all the same things as him. He said she had beautiful red hair, D breasts, liked the same books, movies and music as him. (Yes, he bragged about these things, as disgusting and corny as it sounds now). I was starting to believe he talked her up to make me jealous, which it honestly did. However, I knew it was petty jealousy and I was very happy for him and expressed that to him.
I don't know whose idea it was for her to start communicating with me, but she started emailing me to get to know his best friend (me). I was totally cool with this and was excited to get to know her. Before I know it, she starts getting really nasty with me for no apparent reason. It really upset me. My natural impulse at the time when I was upset was to cut. It was a maladaptive coping mechanism I had for years, and I did it when I was really upset. I explained this to him, and he said he would talk to her. He showed real concern I was harming myself and he also wanted her to stop.
So, he told me he had talked to her, and she had told him she would stop harassing me for no good reason. I really assumed she was jealous and let her know there was nothing to worry about. We were friends and he had a much longer history with her. She didn't stop. She continued to say the vilest and f'd up things to me, including making crass and insensitive comments about my suicidal ideation and self-harm. Naturally I was really upset and cut myself pretty badly. I still have the scar.
This basically went on until they broke up a month later. He said she was doing heroin, and he was vehemently against drugs. He said that they had a good friend that died of an OD, and he couldn't be with her if she was going to do that. It was over. She never contacted me again.
Not long after that B (my ex-bf) had come back from bootcamp. I spent a good deal of time with him while he was on home for leave for two weeks before he shipped out overseas. We decided in that time that we would no longer be FWB because I was starting to have feelings for Bub. Me and Bub started dating right after that. He ended up telling me that him and M didn't really date, and he had only told me that to make me jealous. AHA! I was correct!
So, I asked to meet her. He was a bit hesitant at first, but he finally agreed. At this point his bf V from his home city was dating her. It was the perfect opportunity to meet her as like a double date. I will say, at that time in my life I could be possessive and jealous. Not proud of it, but I was young and immature. I ended up treating her pretty snidely because of this.
One night we were out with them, and Bub got into a car accident. We ended up having to call his dad for a ride home. When we got to his home, his dad was contemplating letting them sleep there. I whispered in Bub's ear that I was not okay with his ex-gf sleeping at his house. She overheard me tell him this. She pulled me aside and told me they never dated. WHAT? I was furious. Bub made eye contact with me, and by the look on his face, I could tell he knew what she told me. The ride back, to drop them at home in his dad's car, was uncomfortable to say the least.
After he dropped them off, I confronted him. His explanation was I was so pushy to meet her, but he knew how jealous I could be, so he didn't want to actually introduce me to the real M. Ends up V was dating a girl with the same name. I felt so stupid and betrayed. I wanted to end it, but he seemed so remorseful I ended up giving him another chance.
Well, the years go rolling by, and I hear no more about this girl who he was so close with, in the past. Bub was a very charismatic person with a lot of friends. He never stopped speaking to friends permanently and they would come in and out of his life. I found it a little odd that there was no mention of her but didn't think much else of it. I also never really formally met her.
Then Facebook became a thing. He ended up being friends with every person he had ever known. Except her. I would bring it up and he would always have some excuse. We ended up moving in with his brother in 2015. I wasn't really around his brother a lot, so I never got a chance to talk to him at length. I remember at one point I brought her up. I was just so curious at the mystery girl and wanted to see if he was still in touch with her. He told me he didn't know what I was talking about. He said his mother never left them with babysitters and only worked when they were in school.
"What does that mean," I'm thinking. WTF does that mean? I brought it up to Bub and he told me she only babysat a few times so his brother probably forgot. But this didn't sit right with me. He had told me that she would babysit them frequently. He denied ever saying the frequency. What could I do but believe him? It had been almost 15 years by that point. That's a long time to keep a secret like that. Surely, he was telling me the truth. I dropped it for good.
We get married that year. We had a child the next year. We had a stillborn a year after that. All this time until 2022, I started feeling really uneasy about our relationship. I started suspecting that his behavior towards me was abusive.
Sidenote: I didn't include all the abusive behaviors in this post, as it would be a novel if I did. I'm simply recalling the events around the catalyst to my descent into hell.
By the end of 2022 I was broken. I had gotten my first of what would end up being 3 TROs against him. I dismissed the first two. (The second was a dual, as he set up a situation that created the need for me to defend myself. He claimed I wasn't defending myself. That's a story for another day). After the first two, I was still so desperate to salvage my marriage with my eternal hope that he could change. I was just so broken by then I didn't think I deserved any better, and no one else could possibly want a worthless, pitiful broken mess like me.
The summer of 2023, while laying sleepless in bed, the memory of M flashed through my mind. I started remembering details I had long forgotten. Why did I never meet her? Why was she never his friend on Facebook? Why had neither of them reached out to each other? I had met every person he talked about, or he was at least friends with them on Facebook. Why not her? Why did his brother not remember? Why did he say M's mother babysat them all the time? I KNOW he originally said that damn it! Why was her email address, at only 17-years-old, her first and last name? 17-year-olds don't use their names like professionals. They call themselves sparklybutterflies86 for christ's sakes! This was all going through my head.
The next day I confronted Bub. I will paraphrase to the best of my memory:
Me: Was M real?
Bub: I thought this had been settled already.
Me: No. No, it hasn't. You told me your brother just did not remember her and that was the last I spoke of it.
Bub: Deadpanned looking me right in the eye "No. She wasn't real. I thought you knew this by now."
I can't really remember what I said at that point, but it was a lot of "how the fuck could you do that? and other expletives. His excuse was he was an insecure teenager, and he was jealous of B and how much I talked about him. A fucking insecure teenager. Talking up his high school crush didn't make me jealous, so he made up a gf.
He pretended to be a gf, who went on to harass the shit out me. Which caused me to be so distraught that I cut myself. He knew I was harming myself and he kept on doing it. I still bare the fucking scar from that time. He involved a poor innocent girl that I was fucking terrible to. Not to mention the fake story of a friend that Od'd. And his excuse for this deranged, diabolical, INSANE fucking shit was, "I was an insecure teenager." No fucking big deal, right?
23 years. Two kids. One alive and one deceased. 23 years of complete and utter psychological annihilation with this man.
If only I had known.
If you have come this far, thank you so much for reading. I left him for good October of last year, and I have never felt more free.

Dealing with the mother in law is hard enough, but can you imagine if you also need to deal with his sisters?
His oldest sister is living next door with her husband and her parent in laws. Her husband has a little bro. According to what she said, the brother is spoiled by the parents and she dislike him. Therefore, her front door uses key because she doesn’t want the brother to come so easily and so often. But our front door uses passcode, and she came over to our house every weekends at that time. She stayed the whole day in our house on weekends.
My husbands father has diabetes and needs kidney dialysis. Most of the time, his second sis is the one who took him to the doctor or hospital. But she needs to work, so my husband also needs to help from time to time. However, whenever they ask the oldest sis to help with the dad, she would say, I am married out already. In my memory, she seldom took the dad to the doctor or the kidney dialysis. I am not good at driving, and was pregnant at that time, I picked his dad up from the hospital once (what is ironic here is that his second sis thought it was their oldest sis picked them up from the hospital even though she is the one also complained the biggest never helped), helped his second sis to send his dad to the kidney dialysis ( because she needs people to help the dad get out or in the car), and helped with translation for his dad’s physical therapy when his second sis was not available. In January of 2021, his dad’s situation is very bad and the nurse asked them to make a decision if the hospital should save his life if ….. the chance is only 50/50, and even though he was saved, he would have to do kidney dialysis for the rest of his life, and he also would have to have his leg amputation. Considering his life quality and the care taking part, his mom and second sis agreed to let him passed away naturally if that really happens. My husband had a hard time making the decisions. The oldest sister kept crying over there, and said we should not give up his life. Suddenly, she turned to me and asked about my opinion. Then I expressed my opinion, if you guys decide to save his life then you guys should share the responsibility of taking care of him and help with doctor visit and kidney dialysis, but you guys also need to think about his life quality and the fact that he would lose his legs. His second sis agreed with what I said, and my husband agreed with his mum and second sis at the end The oldest sis also agreed with then after her husband s persuasion. After his dad passed away, the oldest sis is the one cried the hardest, and the mum told one of their aunt on the phone how sad the oldest daughter is, and asked her not to cry so much, otherwise her health might be affected. Mam, you should show your love and contribute more to your father when he s still alive.
After I had my first kid, especially my relationship with my mother in law was like freezing at that time, my husband and I would go to visit my parents every weekend, one reason is that I could escape that prison like house, the other reason is that my parents could help me with the baby there so that I can rest a little bit. However, I accidentally found out she complained to my husband about me in the message why I always showed them bitchy face at home and why would I go back to my parents house every weekend. But the fact is she came over to our house more often when their dad’s situation was bad. And after the dad passed away, she still came over very often, which lead to her mother in law yelling at her at one time(when her father in law was in hospital because of Covid), saying no daughter in law would go back to her mums house so frequently. She’s lucky to have her husband to back her up by then. And she came over to our house to complained about it, and said I was married to her son but not selling myself to his family. My mother in law told her to keep quiet then the situation would become better.
Talking about the message, how I found out she bitched about me and my family is also very interesting. Thats like when my son was like about 8 months old, my husband told me to let his mum to watch the baby a little bit and would go grocery shopping with me after that meeting. I was waiting for my husband in his office room, and his mom was holding the baby to nap. I left my phone in the living room, so I played with my husband s phone. I accidentally went to the message, and saw that the last msg his oldest sis said is if you go bankrupt don’t expect me to help you. I was wondering what would make her say this. Then I went into their msg. The first time I found out that actually she had so many complaints about my family and me. So my husband got my dad a free tablet through promotion and he shipped it to our house for setup. She saw that package with my dad’s name on it. Second sis said it might be sending here for set up. In the text she told my husband that she wanted to get a tablet and ask for suggestion. My husband asked why would u need that, you don’t use that. Then she said is this your father in law s Xmas gift? My husband explained that’s through a promotion, not he buying it. Then she said, I guess he would not get a Christmas gift since you already got him a house! lol my dad paid half of that retirement house. And because my sis and I could not get a good rate, my husband said he could help, but my sis s side will be responsible for half of the mortgage. My husband s name is also on that title! How come this house would become my dad’s Christmas gift? And in the message, she also said she s not as lucky as me, no need to wash dishes at home. But the fact is I am the one who cooked most in our house and did most of the dish cleaning before my baby came out, I am the one who cleaned the house all the time. I didn’t do so many dishes wash after the baby was born because I needed to take care of the baby and power pump is very exhausting for me at that time. For her, she doesn’t cook much at her house, because either her father in law cook or the parent in laws bring food home when they are off work or her mum would cook and ask the second sis to bring food over! And her parents in laws would clean the whole house every Wednesday at that time! Reading this I felt super angry, my face was burning and my heart was about to jump out of my breast! I directly replied bitch to her! I hung up on her when she called my husband s phone. After my husband finished the meeting , I said, “ u r in trouble now, because I just called your sis bitch!” She called my mother in law saying the brother curse her. And MIL came knocking at the door, disregarding if my husband is still in the meeting or my son was napping in her arm. She asked my husband why cursed his sis! I couldn’t stand any more, then I exploded, and questioned her why every time you defend your daughter no matter shes right or not. Do you know what she said about my parents and me in the message. I also directly called her bitch and claimed that it's her who kicked my mom out of our house when she was here to help me! That became a big arguement and I took my son back to my parents house right after the arguement.
Because of my husband, I tried to fix the relationship after half a year, and we had our own house as well.
However, just two days ago (5/14), his oldest sis called him around 10:30pm using second sis s phone because her husband got her a new phone and would like my husband to set it up for her. Her old phone is still usable, why the new phone must be set up now? And my husband is wondering why she’s not using the her husband’s phone to call but second sister’s phone. My husband went to check and found out she moved into our house, where his mom and second sis are living, with her 18 month son . And He traced that she was living there since 3/16. Not sure about exactly when as the history can only go back to two or three months. My husband and his second sis are the owners, and my husband is helping paying the mortgage ( before we moved out, he is the only one paying the mortgage). Why no one telling us about her move in. And we are sure she has no issue with her husband and parents in law because the husband just bought her the new iPhone and she s living in our house on weekdays, but on weekends she would go back to her own house. How hypocritical it is! When my son was about 8 months old she complained we went back to my parents house every weekend. But now she moved into our house even though her house is next door !!! My husband called the second sis and told her about this, expressed his disappointment about not letting him knowing this, telling her this whole shit is basically slapping my face. And also told them we are going to cancel NC trip. BTW, the oldest sister texted my husband asked him to go back to our house help clean the doggie this week, before the NC trip. Why the heck you live there , eat there, free baby sitter there, you can’t clean the dog with your sister?!!!

I’m just writing for fun so it’s not a big deal. Just wondering if it’s any good.
I pushed, molasses-slow, until I felt her start to give, then with a soft, wet pop, the tip was in. Instinctively, I looked to The Mistress for permission, but she was head back on the pillow, closed eyes, parted lips. With my right hand, my clean hand, I touched her shoulder, and as I reached forward I felt myself push in at least another half-inch by mistake.
“Winifred—“
She opened her eyes just to slits.
“Please,” she said simply, shutting them again. And that was enough go-ahead for me.
The hair on my arms was standing up as I watched my cock disappear, little by little, inside of the most beautiful creature I had ever seen in my life. A long, thin sigh escaped her, a great release, like the last bit of air letting out of a balloon. When Winnie had taken about half of me, she started to grope about blindly until at last she found one of my hands and gripped on — bracing herself for the rest, I suppose.
She was slick and tight and I pushed on with ease. In my mind’s eye, I was floating through a corridor of ribbed, red velvet. My first time is with a vampire, I thought. Imagine that. Then before I knew it, I was in my vampire up to the hilt, groaning aloud. Winnie suddenly released her grip and moved her hands to the small of my back, where she interlaced her fingers, and with all her might, somehow hoisted me even further inside.
Holy shit. I lurched forward, and without thinking, hooked her legs behind me to steady myself. She held me there, hands slipping absently over my ass now, pressing me into her hard as if plugging a mortal wound, as if all her lifeblood would come spilling out once she let go. And we stayed that way, not kissing, not speaking, just throbbing together in silent ecstasy.
Winnie sighed again, this time with a sort of resolve, and those dark eyes opened to peer up at me. A smile crossed her bare lips. They were flushing hot pink with arousal, clean of their usual red paint. I looked back down at her, swallowing back the drool that’d collected under my tongue.
“Do you want to touch me, Francis?”
Her voice was sweetly evil and melodic as birdsong. As a chill slithered up my spine, I wondered if this was witchcraft, but decided in the same instant that I didn’t care. My cock twitched and Winnie must’ve felt it because she laughed at me, a cruel laugh, and drew up her long, delicate arms to caress my face. I bent slightly to meet her. She brushed away the sweat already beading on my temples, the stray hairs stuck to my forehead.
“I’m allowed?” I asked, and it came out hoarse and broken. My cheeks grew hot with embarrassment under her touch and I quickly looked away, clearing my throat. With thumb and forefinger, Winnie expertly took hold of my jaw, brought my gaze back to center, and for the first time that night I took a good look at her. The long, milky-white body. Her silver hair, splayed over her full breasts like lustrous curls of smoke…
“Certainly, darling,” she whispered, thumb tracing my bottom lip now, “certainly.”
I realized my hands were still under her knees, holding up her legs. I passed, painstaking, over her supple thighs and along the planes of her hips until I reached that impossible wasp waist, and when I snaked my fingers around it, my thumbs nearly met at the navel. Sweet Jesus.
Now Winnie had her arms around my neck and she was craning me downward, pulling me into a deep kiss, and I obliged, but I had to let go of her or else I would fall over. I pressed my palms into the mattress on either side of Winnie to hold myself up…
And that’s all I got right now. Is it hot or not? Any feedback is appreciated

Demon Gate: Dreamcatcher

1. Setting: Demon Gate: (a dark/ high fantasy campaign)
2. System: Chaos System by Arcanum Syndicate
3. Time/ Day: Saturday 10pm EST till 1 am EST
4. Platforms: Roll20 & Discord
5. Character Classes: Create your own or choose a premade

About the Campaign: It is the Year of the Crow in the 11th Era. You have watched the twin suns set outside the arched window many times ever since you arrived here. The great city known as The Nine Towers. It is a place of powerful and esoteric knowledge, filled with some of the greatest libraries in the north. The city sits on the borderlands of Thead and Kauldane, two northern kingdoms that were once at war long ago. Yet, now, these two countries are united for the sake of power and peace. For not far away are the countries Varagoth, the land of the goblinoids, and Vasgar to the south, where the vatagi dwell... a race of mutants that many call half demons.
Magic is untrusted in this world. Many blame magic and those who use it on the arrival of the Pale Plague. Necromancers, once hired by the empire during the Black Arbitration, were meant to quell this pandemic. Yet, they could not stop it. For the sick were not undead, they were something else entirely. They were not able to be controlled by black magic. Now, the Arbiters have been disbanded, blamed for the disease by the Aticraulian Empire, the very ones that gave them power to stop it. Now, they are hunted down to be burned at the stake. It is true that magic is dangerous, but the elves believe they can control it. They believe that great things lay hidden within its mysterious secrets.
You have come here to some of the finest schools of magic in the northern lands. All manner of species dwell here, living in harmony in their quest for knowledge. You have come to the Academy of Thaumaturgical Investigation to advance your career, gain power, reputation, coin... well, the rest is for you to decide. Not all of you need to be spell casters. We have plenty of jobs for you to do. For we need all the heroes we can get.
Setting and System: We are playing Demon Gate, and the system is the Chaos System. This particular campaign is a mix of dark fantasy and high fantasy. Some of you can play as new students to a school of magic. Where you are learning your skills for the first time. Even those who are not playing caster classes will be training in combat or other skills they will be learning. During the course of the stay, it will become apparent that there is something amiss.
Platform: Roll20 and Discord: If accepted, I will send you a link to my Discord for the game to be set up in a private room. We are using it as a home base and the link to the Roll20 game is there.
Game Time: 10pm EST Bi-weekly every other Saturday until the campaign is complete. The game runs about 2 and a half to 3 hours where we have a hard stop.
GM: I am a GM with many years of experience, but I am fine with beginning players to this system and I am happy to help out. There are character sheets available or you may choose a premade. All rules are in the handouts as we are designers for Arcanum Syndicate and are creating a new module to playtest so we will not be handing out the books for free. This is a module I am writing and would love to run you through it as a playtester. If you are okay with it I will use your name or alias in the publication as a playtester. There will be a questionnaire to fill out so I can get to know what style of play you like and a bit about yourself. Please feel free to message me if you have any questions.

Shout-out to all the lurking Knicks fans who have nothing better to do with their lives than to spend it here in the Pacers sub cause yall spent all your money paying for rent to live in a shoebox that you share with rats. :)
Yall haven't been relevant since forever and will not go anywhere again this year.
I love how yall say the Pacers are ass when we were the ones that whooped your asses by 30 the other night and made all your players looked like cry babies sitting on the bench covering their heads with their towels in shame.
Respectfully and unrespectfully fuck all yall and can't wait to watch all the loud mouth media heads crying once you're eliminated.
/trashtalk