I’m 19 years old. I’ve never been sexually active. I’d say I have pretty good hygiene. I’ve had irregular periods from the day I started menstruating, & I’ve had 2 UTIs in the past (the first one was very severe), but other than that I’ve never really had any other issues down there.
Starting the first week of March (2024), I started experiencing unbearable itching out of the blue. A week later it evolved into burning, & I had lost all my vaginal fluids. so I went to the OBGYN that day. All of my symptoms lined up w/ a yeast infection so I was prescribed a pill & a cream. However, I felt zero difference. The day I finished my prescriptions I got my culture results back & I was negative for both yeast and BV.
A messaged my the doctor about this so I was invited to come back for a urine culture a few days later to see if I had another UTI. I had a different doctor this time but I was already familiar w/ her. The urine culture came back negative. The OB tried point pressure testing to see if the pain was coming from my urethra or closer to my uterus, but the only pain I was feeling was from the opening of my vagina when she was inserting it. She suggested it could be a ph imbalance & prescribed me a gel. We’ll that gel didn’t work bc I read the drug facts and it said it specifically targets BV, which I was negative for 🤦‍♀️
Around this time I wanted to wait to see the doctor again, so in the meantime, I switched soaps, ordered a probiotic, & chugged water everyday. For a while, my symptoms felt like they were almost gone. But alas, two weeks after this pure bliss my symptoms suddenly came back & were worse than before, both spontaneous & provoked. The itching dialed down but the burning intensified, accompanied by chafing when I walked, intense pain in & around my vulva to the point I couldn’t sit or lay down without pain, & my discharge did comeback but it still wasn’t a lot. It hurt to the touch when wiping, even inserting a tampon resulted in burning pain. Sometimes all of these symptoms would be so bad I’d have to waddle.
I went back to the OB and had a third doctor this time. I got another culture & she also suggested it could be the birth control I was on (Aurovela). I went cold turkey on the pill & overnight my vulva pain was almost gone, & for a few days I thought it had been that the whole time. Well, a few days later my OB called & said the culture detected a heavy growth of e.coli & would prescribe me antibiotics. Long story short the medicine didn’t work & my symptoms persisted, though at a lower intensity. Turns out my birth control had just been feeding my symptoms.
After getting my second period while having these symptoms, my discharge was completely back to normal, but it started to turn a pale yellow color & had its usual scent, but much stronger. I had to stop using ph wipes & vagisil cream because my entire vagina would feel like it caught on fire. My Mom helped do some research, including talking to an acquaintance who knew two ppl w/ my exact same dilemma, & my Mom and I found the problem: AEROBIC VAGINITIS! My symptoms & the type of bacteria I contracted line up with all of this! However, there’s no definitive way to cure it & in a lot of cases, it’s chronic, so that’s what scares me.
I ordered a couple packs of Neueve suppositories, & I thought they were working pretty well, I felt almost nothing & had felt back to normal before this all started. Well as of right now, it is mid May, & the last suppository is still in my system, & I had a symptom flare up last night & has persisted ever since. No itching, but the opening of my vag is tingly, stinging & sensitive. My Mom is going to try and find a specialist for me while I ordered a couple more Neueve packs. I’ve dealt w/ this for 2 1/2 months now! My heart goes out to anyone who had experienced this just like I am now.
If anyone has any advice or tips for me, please let me know. I don’t want this to overtake my life & I want my confidence back. I understand this takes time to go away but I need somewhere to start. Thank you.

Hello! After giving myself time to explore, heal, and rediscover lost passions/hobbies, I think now is the perfect time to try and open my heart again.
I am in my early 20s, studying in one of the UAAP schools, pursuing a healthcare-related degree. I am most passionate about pursuing higher studies further to advance my skills for myself and my future patients.
I am taller and bigger than the average Filipina, standing at 5’6, and I am plus-sized due to some hormonal problems and medications, but I am working on it for my physical and mental well-being. I think I look presentable enough :) I enjoy making myself look good and am a makeup enthusiast.
Honestly, I am busy most of the time but keen on building a connection enough to make time for you. Some have a lot on their plates, so I know how to respect one's time and boundaries. I am a great listener and adore remembering every detail of your life.
I mostly struggle communicating my feelings because I was so used to repressing them. But, I'm starting to learn how to communicate with the people l am acquainted with, and I think I have made significant progress over the past two years
I am looking for someone who possesses the following: - Soft-spoken and calm - Filipino - Emotionally intelligent - Socially aware - Funny - Family oriented - Single :) - Attentive and cares enough to know more about me on a deeper level - Patient enough to communicate - Please be not nonchalant ☹️ - Speaks my love language (Quality time, words of affirmation, and Acts of Service) - Not afraid to show his feminine side! - Preferably in the med or business field (but anything will do naman!) - Taller than me - I have a bias towards big bois hehe
I have preferences, but I think what’s important is we are of the same or similar wavelength regarding values and intellect

I do not know if you have the patience to read this review as it is over 1800 words, but I have tried my best to write it in a narrative of how the events happened. I just had to express how bad and sad I feel about this whole experience. Please do read it and help me find a solution.
I have a Lenovo Legion y740 I7 processor and RTX 2060 that I saved up for 3 years and bought for 150000 Rs in May 2020. I treated my laptop with all the love in the world, learning about all the laptop etiquette that is required to operate such a powerful machine. The laptop ran most games beautifully and I enjoyed every moment with it. I traded stocks, did my data analysis for my job, and kept a detailed plan for my future studies on my laptop. For around 4 years, all was good...
Until…
On Feb 1st, 2024, my laptop would not turn on and the next day (Feb 2nd) I rushed it to this Lenovo service center. I explained the problem and the first thing I was asked was if it was under warranty. It was not under warranty.
They explained that there could be an issue with the motherboard, and they would get back to me soon. So, I waited and waited and waited. There was no response. So I called them on Feb 5th, 2024, and asked them about my laptop, they asked me for another day, and then on 6thFeb, I got an Email (Screenshot attached), saying that I had two options, one was to get the motherboard replaced( which they told me would cost me about 60000 Rs) The other one is more interesting and cost-effective, it was the chip level repair option where they would replace the chip and ( as estimated in the email) would cost 5000rs to 7000rs and would take 25 to 35 days( remember this, it is important for what’s coming). I gave a thumbs up for the chip level repair on 6th Feb 2024.
On 26th March 2024, I sent them an email(screenshot attached) asking about the status as it had been over 50 days since I had given them my laptop. On 27th March 2024, they responded saying it is still under repair and the lab team has not responded to them, and that they’ll get back to me in a few days. I requested them to keep me updated in the process, and they said “Noted” (remember this, it too is important).
On 1st April 2024 (over 60 days now) I called them to enquire, and they gave me complete technical jargon about why the repairs were late, thinking I would not understand it, but guess what, I did understand it and realized that they are, for some reason, the people at their “Lab” where not able to find out why my laptop was not turning on.
On 2nd April, This is when I sent them a strongly worded mail. (screenshot attached). Expressing how they have wasted my time of 60 days and how I want a fully functional laptop and I am not willing to pay anything currently.
They did not respond to this email. So, I called them and they explained that there was something wrong with the CPU and that I must prepay for the part to be delivered to the center. It had been over 60 days, so I agreed to this repair.
After another Email exchange where I request the quotation of the price. On 4th April 2024, they sent me a quotation of 20284 Rs (Screenshot attached) and asked for another 4 to 6 weeks. I promptly make the payment, explain to them it’s my hard-earned money and do the repairs promptly.
Fast forward to 22nd April 2024, when I asked for an update, they replied saying it is still under observation in the lab.
On 29th, 30th April, and 2nd May, I sent three emails asking for an update about my laptop, but there was no response(please keep in mind that ‘noted’ part they said about updating me). On 3rd May, I got an email saying my laptop was not functional (screenshot attached), I called them, (By now it has been over 90 days), over a 23-minute call (I have all the calls recorded) …
They told me my laptop was still not functional and that I should take the refund of the 20284 Rs and collect the laptop and it is best if I just go. I don’t want that, my 90-plus days have value. My time and mental health have value!!! The anguish and anxiety I went through have to mean something, there has to be some result to my 90 days!!!
On that day, I rushed to the service center and had a word with the management where I clearly and strongly expressed my worries, concerns, and anger with the management and how they have caused me over 90 days of absolute mental anguish (this conversation took over an hour and a half). They blamed the lab, the engineer, parts delivery, and many more things when I confronted them.
Let’s get one thing clear, as a consumer who has paid 150000 Rs for the laptop and 20284 Rs for the part and repairs, do I have to understand the internal workings of a service center? Should I go talk to the engineer parts delivery personnel or the lab? Or should I as a consumer hold the service centre accountable for all the loss of time and money? Are the internal workings of a service center my problem? I’d say no, it’s not, so I do not want to hear why it is late, because whatever the reason is, it is not my problem. My time, effort, and money have been wasted.
After bantering for a long time, I simply requested a fully functional laptop or refund of 20284 and compensation for the 90+ days they wasted mine. For this, they asked for time till May 11th, 2024, to which I agreed, and asked them to not expect me to pay anything.
On 11th May 2024, AFTER OVER 100 DAYS, I got a call from the engineer saying my laptop works and asked for the password to check the functionality!!! Hurray !!! I leaped in joy and rushed to the service center. I sat down they turned on the laptop, I put in my password and the screen opened.
BUT………
As the laptop settled in, the fan speed increased and there was a rough noise from the fan, like the fan was rubbing against something as it turned, the sound was so loud that even the sound from the laptop speakers could not subdue it. I raised an issue immediately.
The facts – 1. They had my laptop for over 100 days.

1. The fan has an issue that was not present before I gave them the laptop.

So, I asked them to fix it, to which they surprisingly agreed. For the sake of documentation, I sent them an Email alerting them of the situation.
Ohh but it’s not over yet….
On 13th May 2024,
They sent an Email (screenshot attached) saying it was fixed and that I could collect it. So
So, on the 14th of May 2024, I am going to pick up my beloved laptop from the center. I carefully inspect it as per their instruction on their bulletin board AND I FOUND ANOTHER ISSUE. This time, when I used discrete graphics instead of switchable ones, MY SCREEN WOULD BE VERY DIM until connected to an external display and this was unacceptable after they claimed full functionality.
They took my laptop in for another inspection, and after 1 and a half hours, they came out saying it worked well on their testing SSD and suggested that I back up my data (which I did at that moment) and allow them a day to factory reset my laptop. For which I agreed, and they offered to deliver it to the next day. The laptop works fine except for this software issue and I was in high hopes that it would be delivered fine.
The next day, 15th May 2024, I got an email saying my laptop was to be delivered to my workplace, which is only 20 minutes away from the service center. And I get a call and go pick up my laptop around 1:40 pm. I let it rest at my desk and around 4: 45pm, after all my meetings, I open my laptop.
AND GUESS WHAT FOLKS….
The moment I opened the laptop I found that the hinge was damaged, the laptop had not been reassembled properly, the sides were loose, and the hinge was damaged to the point where the display on the right side of the laptop was …POPPING OUT.
My blood boiled, I immediately called the service center and told them about this, but they responded very insensitively. I rushed my laptop to the service center.
On the verge of tears, I explained everything, and the manager Rashid Khan, and Engineer Prasad Reddy were just saying the same thing over and over again- about how they deliver many laptops every day and most have never had such an issue. They need time till Friday 17th May 2024 to give me a course of action for this issue, about how they need to check the CCTVs at their service center to see if this was caused by the internal team.
But here are the facts,
My laptop has been in the care of the service center for over 100 days.
On 15th May 2024, it was delivered at around 1:40 pm.
On 15th May 2024, at around 4:45 pm when I opened it, I found that the hinge and display were damaged.
I reluctantly agreed and sent them an email to keep things documented.
Now I sit and write this with a heavy heart and tears in my eyes. I do not want to be experiencing this. I just want my laptop back in a fully functional condition.
Here are what mistakes the Service center made according to me :

1. They asked for 25 to 35 days and did not inform me until I emailed them 50 days later.
2. There was absolutely no communication from their side about my laptop’s condition even after they ‘Noted’ my request. They kept me on hold for a long time or simply did not respond to my calls.
3. If they had not diagnosed the problem by day 35, they should have informed me and I would have taken it elsewhere, it is because they are the official Lenovo service center that I trusted them in the first place.
4. Even after repairs, they did not check ‘Full functionality’ and yet claimed the laptop was okay.
5. I had to go to the center and diagnose my laptop because they kept overseeing everything.

She's much younger than me and in a relationship, but we worked together quite closely last year and it just happened. I didn't even take it seriously at first until it was full blown thinking about her every single day, day and night. I just loved how it felt being in her company, the only time I felt remotely normal or happy I guess. She's more extrovert than me, and much more confident, but we have common interests and values. It felt like she understood me on a level most people don't.
Anyway, I got another job so I thought it would take care of itself. Hated it there though, and found myself slipping into depression. I quit after a few weeks and returned to the other job. I avoided her for a while when I came back, because she'd messaged me to ask how the new job was going and when I explained how much I was struggling she ignored me. It wasn't unusual for her to ignore my messages, in fact it happened quite often, she'd explain it away by saying she was "busy" and I wouldn't make a big deal out of it but this time it hurt. She'd also regularly make promises she wouldn't keep, plans she wouldn't stick to. But obviously I'd put her on this massive pedestal so I didn't recognise this behaviour for what it was.
Eventually we bumped into eachother and she seemed pleased to see me back. We planned to catch up at some point. Though a few days later I messaged her to say I needed some space and admitted my feelings for her had become too strong. She was okay with this. But I found that we kept bumping into eachother after that, and it was starting to feel awkward, so we knocked that on the head after about a week.
We still hadn't had a proper convo at this point, so I asked if we could meet up on her break one day. She agreed. Instead she chose to spend it with someone else, without telling me. Bear in mind I was on a 12hr shift this day and working flat out, it would have been nice to at least know she'd taken hers so I could take mine. Sure, jealousy was a factor, but it was more the lack of consideration. So when I saw her later that day, probably for the first time in our friendship, I let it be known she'd upset me. She denied that I'd made her uncomfortable by admitting feelings, wasn't very apologetic about it and walked off.
She stopped speaking to me after this, said my reaction was uncalled for. I did threaten to leave, not to make her feel bad but because I genuinely can't stand the feeling of tension at work. It would have been the same with anyone. My efforts to reconnect with her after this failed, she'd walk past me like I didn't exist.
All the while my mental health was plummeting massively, and so a couple of days after Christmas I set out to take my own life. I sent out several goodbye messages to several people that day, hers was pretty long. I went into great detail about how much I loved her and why. Of course never for a second did I think I'd have to face her again after sending this.
Anyway, I didn't get very far in my bid because I got too drunk before I could do anything stupid and was found by a member of the public. Her response to all of this was to cut me off (block me), stop talking to me and not even so much as ask how I was doing when I returned to work. I meanwhile started therapy and a stronger dose of antidepressants which got me to a slightly better place inside my head.
I decided to work around her shifts to make this easier on us both, but this was proving increasingly difficult, I was having to do a really horrible shift pattern. I also found that having to look up her hours and tweak mine to fit still involved me having to think about her, so it wasn't really solving the problem.
I got my line manager to arrange an informal chat, if she was willing which she was. I thought if we could have a heart to heart she might come around. She showed zero warmth to me throughout, and I wasn't getting through it felt like or she was holding back somewhat. I apologised for the upset I caused her that day. She explained that she cut me off because the messages were getting "too much" and her boyfriend wouldn't like it, ignoring the obvious context of me being out of my mind and suicidal. I accepted this anyway and said I didn't really need her number but can we at least try again as work friends, she agreed but only if we take things slow.
A week later, I tried to make the situation better by giving her money. Quite a lot of money. I felt like I'd ruined her Christmas, and I wanted to help her replace those bad memories with some better ones. Her and her boyfriend could go on a nice holiday or whatever, that was my thinking. My intentions were good but it backfired massively, she was totally freaked out by this and stopped talking to me again. The money was handed in to my bosses, so I had to explain myself to them as I sheepishly came to collect it. They were sympathetic.
I tried to respect her wishes and stay out of her way after this, as I heard the fact that I kept giving the money back wound her up. This only happened about twice, and only because it felt like she wasn't properly considering it. She also gave it back through the duty manager at the time instead of directly to me.
Fast forward about two or three weeks, I needed help with a work task. The manager on duty at the time said he could only spare me one person which was her. We approached her, she seemed fine with it. 10 minutes later he comes back, "oh, there's been a change of plan and I need her to do something else, you can have someone else in 2 hours." Naturally I saw through this, so I approached her to confront her about it, to reassure her I just wanted help with something and I wasn't looking to reconcile, but she refused to talk to me. Said her family wouldn't like it - one of her cousins works in the same building and was on shift at the time.
This was probably the second worst moment of my life. Someone I adored with all of my heart had such a low opinion of me they didn't want to talk to me at all, work in close proximity to me, and her family thought I was some kind of monster capable of causing their daughter great harm.
I quit the job there and then and walked out. As I came out, she was stood by the exit with the duty manager talking. He said goodbye, she said nothing, didn't even look at me. I went on a long drive to clear my head, came back to find police at my door concerned for my welfare. After a meeting with my boss the next day I agreed to stay on, but only due to a lack of options. They refused to transfer me to another site, said the situation wasn't serious enough yet.
Since then I have worked around all but one of her shifts but I still think about it constantly. I carry this enormous sadness around with me, guilt and shame, but also this fear that I'm going to bump into her again and how that will feel. I don't want to think about it anymore, so my natural inclination is to want to leave, but the jobs market is poor, mentally I'm not ready and all the friends I have in the world work there and I need them close right now.
How do I get past it? How do I stop feeling so down about someone who couldn't give less of a f--k? It's ridiculous, and yet I'm powerless to do anything about it. Every day is like groundhog day in my head. I know I didn't behave perfectly by any means, the last thing I would ever want to do is hurt her in any way and I did, but losing her feels like punishment enough. Why do I have to suffer daily reminders on top of that? It's just horrible. And I don't see a way out.

Trigger warning- hospital stories I am looking for validation through strangers once again as I think it will help me advocate for myself in real life. I’m talking to my therapist about this soon too no therapy advice please. So as of about a month ago I 21f was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma (yes cancer, so sad, so young, let’s not focus on that part for the sake of this post.) This diagnosis comes with a bunch of medical testing and a few procedures to pretty much assess how bad this shit is. I was uneasy knowing this as I have severe trust issues with anyone I am specifically told to trust (parents, teachers, doctors) as a result from trauma.
I had a surgery about two weeks ago to get a lymph node removed on my neck. Looking back I’m pretty upset about how I was treated but I’m being made to feel unreasonable because this is how everyone is treated. I made it clear to my care team that I was nervous and uncomfortable and blatantly asked for reassurance and to have the procedure explained in detail. I made it so clear that I had to understand what was going to be happening to me. A big part was that I did not want to be naked on the table but I didn’t say that specifically because I don’t expect them to accommodate that but I thought I would be able to tell if I would be exposed at any part of the procedure based on what they had to do. I just needed to know to mentally prepare.
As I’m falling asleep I realize they’re pulling down the top part of my gown and my boobs are out in the open. I just remember essentially being like “what the fuck is that for” and then reminding myself that I have cancer and have bigger problems. I wake up laying down and I’m aware of what is going on but I’m very out of it. I open my eyes to look down and see that she once again pulled my gown down to remove the sticky heart monitor things that had been placed there before. There was a curtain next to me so the guy next to me couldn’t see but anyone coming from the front or the right would have been able to see me. The next day I’m examining myself in the mirror and I see tiny cuts around my incision and I ask then I’m told it is from some type of metal clamps used to hold open the part they were operating on. I cried about it off and on for the rest of the day of mostly frustration that I tried so hard to prevent the trigger of not knowing what is happening to me and it was all pointless. Now yesterday I found out they want to knock me out again and do a bunch more stuff all at once one of those being taking some of eggs to freeze them since there’s a 5 percent chance I’ll be infertile after this crap. But the oncologist TOLD me this is what is happening as if I literally have no say in if I’m going to get my fucking ovary cut open. Pretty much saying “might as well since we’re in there”. Like that is my organ dude it’s a big deal whether you try to gaslight me that it is or not it’s a big deal so at least let me think about it.
I’m freaking out because cancer is hard enough for a person with a normal amount of trauma but for me I just don’t know how I am going to survive if this is how I am going to be treated. Especially when I’m being made to feel crazy and inconvenient for having questions or concerns at all. I am trying to work with these people and my way of doing that is by wanting to be aware of what is happening and in general it’s totally fair to want to know if a private area is going to be seen by a group of old men while you’re unconscious or have extra cuts on your neck from a surgery. The people that are supposed to save me are taking the fucking life out of me. Congrats if you read all this I didn’t know what context was important so there ya go.

I would prefer some religious perspective on this post since I’m a Christian woman (F28) and my fiancé and upcoming husband is a Muslim (30M)
He doesn’t have a problem with my faith because I’m one of the people of the book and he is allowed to marry me
Unfortunately I’m born with a severe and permanent heart condition and my resting saturation is between 80-85% and it decreases with physical activity. So it is a lot lower than normal. My cardiologists have strongly advised against having children and becoming pregnant due to my heart condition. It could make my heart condition worse with all sorts of potential new conditions or even mortality to both me and baby. It could also be passed on the child and cause stillbirth, miscarriages and premature births if my heart condition was milder and if I was able to get pregnant
But my heart condition is very complex and requires monitoring every six months. I can’t take all medications because I’m at higher risk of developing liver failure. My current medication is the only one that has worked for keeping my oxygen levels stable. My condition can’t be cured medically or surgically but the medication helps with stabilizing my oxygen levels so it at least doesn’t get worse.
Unfortunately it doesn’t uptake progesterone very well and I can’t take estrogen either because of the higher risks of blood clots and heart attacks.
But my fiancé still won’t let me get permanently sterilized even though I’ve tried to explain my condition and was honest about the fact that I’m unable to have children. In the beginning he seemed to understand but now it seems like he has an unrealistic idea that I might be able to have children one day. He even agreed to get a vasectomy but now he doesn’t want one and claims he never said he would get one.
I also told him the doctors have said a future surgery would be very invasive and risky to my heart health. More risky than beneficial. But even then he doesn’t seem to get it and still thinks it can be cured one day, but at this point there might be more risks related to pregnancy due to age even if I got it cured and even then it is still risky to my heart health.
It makes me feel like he isn’t honest about wanting children and that he keeps his options open with me because he probably thinks he can’t find anyone else to have children with him due to his own medical problems. So that’s probably why he won’t let me despite knowing the risks and dangers it could pose to my health and life.
Anyone with advice on what to do to make him understand my worries? He normally is very kind and caring about my health but the idea of permanent sterilization just upsets him
tl;dr

10 years later, Bingo's Dining and Entertainment re-opened after the now new owners got ahold of the remains of the Buttercup animatronic and it's endoskeleton, but it was re-opened as Buttercup's Grill & Entertainment due to them no having the rights to the original name, as an entertainment and restaurant joint made for literallyw everyone to enjoy. The building was then redesigned, with the lobby doors and windows being barricaded, as a new lobby was built for their redesign of the location...
The other animatronics were all rediscovered during the clean up before the redesign of the location... And they were tidied up and ready to use once again. But there was an incident, apparently Citrus extended his wings while a little girl was hugging him, causing them to puncture through the kid and kill her... This then made people think that the animatronics from Bingo's were dangerous, and they were later ordered by the law to decomission all of the animatronics.. other than Buttercup and Lizzy. The new owners were then forced to destroy the animatronics. To make up for this, they then built Caesar, a very fiesty, yet safe wolf animatronic, with the purpose of him performing alongside Buttercup.
Decommissioned Bingo, Decommissioned Blossom, and Decommissioned Citrus are all locked away in the barricaded lobby......
NIGHT 1 - Hey, are you there? Yes, yes. You were the security guard at.. the old place. The Authorities have deemed you the perfect candidate for the investigation of this place following.. what happened to her. You know, the girl? I need you to just.. write down everything that happens over the next 5 nights, and we will reward you a few thousand dollars for your time. About $5,000. But you will get absolutely nothing if you do not complete this investigation. Listen. Everything should go smoothly, and you should be safe. But if you feel unsafe, you should have a console near you, right? That controls the computer in front of you, on your desk. You can monitor the building's 11 different cameras freely, and you can even mess with the building's ventilation systems.. They have silent ventilation that you can enable at any time, but it will affect your monitor's power. Now, there is a door on your left, a door on your right, and a hallway in front of you, correct? Just checking. I'll leave you alone now, but I will reach out again tomorrow night.
Buttercup and Caesar are now active. If Buttercup is at one of your doors, close it quickly. Caesar is very sensitive to sound. Activating silent ventilation will usually make him leave if he appears in your hallway.
Your monitor is on a very limited power supply. It starts with 100% Power, but it loses 1% every 8.5 seconds. For each usage increasing action, it starts to go down 33% faster.
All usage increasing actions are having your monitor on, having silent ventilation activated, and having the camera's red light on.
The building is very dark, so it is recommended to activate the red light on the camera that you are on in order to see much, much better.
All 11 of the cameras are the Show Stage, Dining Area, Main Lobby, Lobby Office, Left Corridor, Right Corridor, Center Hallway, Kitchen, Dance Floor, Storage, and the Old Lobby (camera disabled until night 3). The red light on the Old Lobby Camera flickers quite frequentlye, but it iss on random patterns.
NIGHT 2 - Hey, I see that your first night of investigation went well. See? I told you it wouldn't be a problem! Anyway.. I heard that they have another animatronic that they recently built being held in the storage room.. I suggest that you monitor that one, as well... We have upgraded your monitor to have more control over the building's ventilation system, allowing for you to now activate Maximum Ventilation. It maximizes the power of the vents, but it can also make quite a lot of noise. And yes, this will affect your monitor's power supply. Anyway, I have to go.... But I will keep in touch. Take care.
Another brand new animatronic, Chuck The Woodchuck, has been activated. If you hear a scratching sound, deactivate Silent Ventilation if it is active, and activate the Maximum Ventilation, which will create a lot of noise, scaring Chuck away and most likely luring Caesar towards you in the process.
NIGHT 3 - Hey! We received your report of nights 1 & 2, and we are.. quite concerned, to say the least. They activated and tried to get into the security office? We might just reward you with all of the money for the risk and pull you out now... But this is important! Here, how about this? Finish your last 3 nights.. and we will double your pay. How does that sound? I hope that you can--
Decommissioned Bingo, Blossom, and Citrus are now active. If you spot Citrus flying into the camera, switch cameras immediately, otherwise he will crash your monitor and keep it turned off for about 6.5 seconds.
If Bingo gets into your office from the hallway, turn off your lights asap.
If Blossom gets into your office from the hallway, turn off your lights asap.
NIGHT 4 - Hey! We did get your report, and... I'm sorry. But how? How are they activated? I thought that they were locked away and decommissioned? We ordered that. By law! I'm pulling you out of there tonight, just survive until then! We ordered a lockdown, so you cannot get out, and nobody can get in.. But we will break in, as we have the authority to, and we should have you out of there by 9 AM. An hour longer than usual, I know, I know. I wish that we could do it any sooner. But truthfully, lockdown does end at 6 AM. Just leave then, to be safe. We are going to have those animatronics completely scrapped by tomorrow. Don't you worry. Good luck. I'll see you soon, okay?
NIGHT 5 - Hi there. You may have heard of me before. I am the owner of this establishment. I do not like what you have been doing.. And now, you know too much. And you will not make it out of there alive tonight. Where is your little officer friend, you may be asking? Well, we took him, too... He is locked away in.. a secret room. If you ever at any point try to leave, I will shoot him.
6 AM PHONE CALL - Hey! Hey! Hey! Can you hear me? Oh, thank goodness! It's me! I escaped! He went to go tweak the animatronics, and to make them.. well, only so much more deadly. You need to get out of there, okay? We will surround the place, and send him to where he belongs, behind bars. But I have to run all the way to the station, and then it takes us time to get there, and we should be there around 8 AM... I'm sorry, okay? You can do this. You have to. If you want yourself to live, of course.
NIGHT 6 - It's safer now, don't freak out. We have him locked up behind bars, and we have completely just dismantled Buttercup, Caesar, and Chuck. However, those older ones might not be happy.. So expect some serious aggression from them tonight. We just need you to collect some data.. Especially after what happened yesterday, you know....?

First off let me say it was his idea to share locations to begin with. We’ve been having a lot of issues lately regarding not spending time together. He is always working 4 am- 10 am then 10 am-5pm & lately he’s spending a lot of times at his moms house. I work a full time Job and never have any time to myself I’m always taking care of the kids I do 95 percent of everything for them. While cleaning the house. He does the cooking or he buys the food if we eat out. I feel like we spend no time together on top of feeling like I have no life. The other night he left work early and our dog had to get a rabies vaccine. He had time to stop home before tending to his grandma but I still had to take an extra long lunch break to take the dog to get it done. Even though technically it’s his dog I told him I didn’t want a dog but I take more care of it then he does. So anyway besides the point. The other night he was at his moms I could see his location and he said he wouldn’t be long. He ended up running errands for her at 11 o’clock at night . And I could see it from his location. I was pissed and confronted him about why why never spend time together and he could do that for her but can’t help me out with HIS dog or spend time with me. He turned it off that night and hasn’t turned it back on since. I finally decided to ask him what’s up. We’ve shared it for 5 years and you just turn it off now. Saturday night he spent the whole night out and didn’t come home. I did confirm where he was but I was up all night and couldn’t sleep. And that’s not something he typically does. It would’ve saved me a nights sleep if I had the location since he stopped communicating with me. I asked him about the location and this is how the convo went. I really need input and another perspective about this.
I called him on the phone to ask him then his phone died so he text me back
Him : Babe do as you please. My location settings is off which means I can’t see your location anyhow. When I turn it back on you can see mine.
Me : I know that babe but why do you turn it off ? You either want to share or you don’t. That’s what I’m asking babe. You never used to just shut it off so I am confused as to the random ons and offs.
Him: Cause I’m not worried about it. I feel like shit though babe
Me: I am worried about it though. So do you want to just turn it off and be done with it ? Cause it would’ve came in handy when I was wondering where you were on Saturday night all night. Would’ve saved me some anxiety.
Him: Do what you want babe. Thank you babe. What time y’all leaving?
Me: I don’t know but I’m asking you collectively. It was your idea to share the locations to begin with and I’m telling you something is bothering me. It’s literally as simple as pressing a button to fix it. If you don’t want to do that babe let me know.
Him: I’ll press the button when it’s important babe. It’s not like I can see yours. That’s all I have to say about it. Are yall going to the aquarium or the boys being bad.
Me: We’ve done it for 5 years I don’t understand why it’s suddenly different now though suddenly you aren’t worried about it ? Right when we’re going through hard times. We are about to go I’ve got to get myself together.
Him: Why are you pressing it so bad like I go so many damn places? Like damn it’s not that serious especially when I’m a call or FaceTime away. Because I don’t care to turn it on unless I’m in an unfamiliar place where you got to worry about me. As of now I don’t do shit I only go to family house so I’ll turn it on when I need to.
Me: Then what was the point of all this time having it on constantly ?
Him: Why is this even a debate? We shouldn’t even be going back and forth over this. It’s not even that serious Smfh. Let’s just spark more problems
Me: I just figured turning it back on would be a simple fix but I’ll just be quiet. My reasoning is that I’m used to it so I wanna know what’s different now. Clearly there was a change of heart for some reason. But it’s ok. Do what you think is best.
Him: Why do you go through these phases? Drilling shit in your head so that you put yourself in a bad place
Me: If your spouse does something for years then suddenly changes it puts you in a weird mindset. Especially when there’s no compromising or reason behind it.
Am I wrong ? Am I overreacting or acting controlling ? I just feel there was no explanation as to why especially when we’re not going through the best time in our marriage why wouldn’t you just want to put your wife’s mind at ease ??

Been with my spouse for 8 years. Poly actively the past 3 years and my spouse only became actively poly the past year. In our otherwise great, open, honest, reliable marriage them being poly has caused the most problems recently.
My spouse has now met someone and after three months claims they are offical 'partners' and they are in love and its not just NRE. For my spouse this is the first person they have slept with since me 8 years ago. Prior to me they had been with one other person in a toxic relationship for 2 years
On the other hand I have dated alot, causally, had more relationships and generally have a wealth of more experiance in dating and sex. So when ive dated poly those experiences weren't so new and exciting in the same way.
My spouses character is such that there was always a concern that if they met someone it would be 'really really' serious because they aren't só 'fickle' about thier relationships and take time to warm up. I've never geuniely worried about this because I felt with our bond and history we would always be able to prioritise and manage our marriage. They lived a very sheltered and inexperianced life in terms of dating and sex and that was one of the reasons in my head we needed to be poly because I wanted them to be able to explore themselves and I knew eventually they would want to do that too - luckily I am poly so it felt ideal that they could still be with me and have space to do that.
But since they met this new person they seem to be a different person. After the first date they went on 2 dates the same week and then forgot to ring me on my birthday. The relationship has escalated unbeleivablly quickly. The other person is poly and they are learning and being exposed to a whole world that they previously were quite frigid about (they would never go to sex parties with me). They are super smitten but also not rational - they exposed me to herpes without telling me for example. They are a health freak almost OCD so i never thought something like that would be possible. At thier birthday party I planned and organised they totally forgot I was there (in thier own words) whilst there partner was there. They have had 3 months of dating this person freely as I was away and we agreed to not check in to avoid the arguments it was causing. They refuse to acknowlgde that all of this is even out of character or pretty quick. They just gone on defence. The worst part of it all is that they seem to have 'realised' that they are not happy in the marriage and that I need to make some changes. This 3 months relationship seems to have triggered the realisation which maybe they did feel but they are being so cold and detached and said they will not let me hinder or affect thier current relationship . They feel like alot of my issues around this is not being able to handle them being poly and that it's been completely unbalanced because they have accomedating my dating.
This is true however I feel I was a better hinge, I communicated every relationship I have in a level detail they wanted and any mistake I made were quickly addressed and never done again. If there was ever a moment I felt my spouse was really unhappy I pulled back until they were comfortable, ultimately for me I would never jepordise my marriage for another relationship. It hurts to see that they are willing, able and enthusiastically wanting to do that now.
Part of me want to see them as living out thier teenage years and that involves a level of wrecklessness thats totally out of character but maybe should be expected. The other Part of me thinks that maybe my loss of apetitie and nightmare that my life/my marriage is falling apart is actually my intution preparing me.
Or thirdly maybe I can't handle them being poly and now they finally are the reality is hitting me and thats why everything feels like the end of the world. But yes them falling in love and being so attached to someone is hurtful and makes me feel jealous however I dont think those feelings are anything to do with the hurt from the other stuff (neglecting and picking our marriage all of a sudden, making me feel second best, prioritising the new person with wild abadon, and the total disconnect we now suddenly have out of no where)
It's hard to give full context but I think it's important to understand the differences in our personality which is why this is all extra hard. I'm trying to rationlise and understand. I want to salvage our marriage and I 100% want to continue for both us to be poly but my heart can't take it this way. I have another partner atm to and im such a wreck, having panic attacts and barely eating..... I can't engage with them which is another layer of upset and complication. My partners NRE is even affectijg how I show up for my partner of 1 year. It's very complicated to explain to mono people só that's why im just trying to get advice here

Preface: This is for Vedic, Sidereal Astrology.
This took a super long time to finish, but I've finally reached a point where I think I'm done trying to improve it. This part will focus more on how Purva Bhadrapada manifests for individuals.
Nature
Purva Bhadrapada reminds me a lot of Kali Yuga. In Hindu cosmology, Kali is the final of the four ages that the world goes through as part of a continuous cycle of creation, maintenance, and dissolution. It is the final stage before the onset of a new cycle, promising the destruction of the old order and the eventual merging of all into a unified whole. It signifies a time of dual balance before dissolution of individual identities and the reunification of all existence with the divine source. This can be viewed as being similar to the process of individual death, but it is on a universal scale. Kali Yuga is considered the age of darkness and moral decline, where spiritual values deteriorate and materialism prevails. According to Hindu scriptures, Kali Yuga is characterized by widespread social, political, and moral corruption, as well as a decline in virtue and Dharma (righteousness). It is believed that, during this age, human beings face numerous challenges and spiritual tests, and the pursuit of higher consciousness becomes increasingly more difficult compared to the previous Yugas. Just as Kali Yuga tests individuals with challenges to their spiritual resolve amidst the prevailing degeneration of values, Purva Bhadrapada is a cosmic stage where one's truest nature is tested through the weakening separation of the spiritual and the material. Here, individuals are made to confront their deepest fears and desires, burdened with the challenge of facing their true nature and purifying their souls. The emphasis of this nakshatra lies in releasing attachments amidst the seduction of outer freedom and power, mirroring the spiritual trials inherent to Kali Yuga. Yet, despite challenges of degeneration, there exists a unique opportunity during the stages of both Kali and Purva Bhadrapada. Kali is believed to be the best time for spiritual progress and true liberation because individuals can attain spiritual growth more rapidly due to the intensity of the challenges they face during this period, and the same is true of Purva Bhadrapada nakshatra. Both Kali and Purva Bhadrapada emphasize the importance of transcending mundane concerns and dedicatedly seeking spiritual truth amidst the backdrop of pervading ignorance.
The primary nature of Purva Bhadrapada is that of penance and disequilibrium. Purva Bhadrapada is the stage of evolution where individuals are made to undergo intense internal transformation and dissolution, shedding layers of their being in preparation for spiritual renewal and divine return. This process of metamorphosis can be seen as a type of penance, whether embraced willingly or thrust upon them. It offers eventual rewards as they journey towards enlightenment. As the primary nature of Purva Bhadrapada revolves around penance and transformation, individuals heavily influenced by this Nakshatra are oriented towards personal introspection and societal purification, viewing their lives as both a personal quest for growth and an opportunity to contribute to something greater. Individually, they seek to cleanse themselves of past transgressions and strive for spiritual redemption, and they feel personally responsible for their impact on others. At a broader societal level, they are driven by a strong sense of justice and a duty to rectify societal wrongs of the past and present in order to contribute to the collective upliftment and purification of their community. As such, they often subject themselves and others to extreme physical, mental, and spiritual challenges. They are presented with a kind of spiritual trial of sacrifice: either they can willingly embrace self-denial and endure while remaining detached, or they can create so much desire and fear that it causes them to lose the direction of their souls in the process. While the primary manifestation of Purva Bhadrapada energy is inwardly focused on cultivating self-discipline and perfection, oftentimes to an unhealthy degree, sometimes the focus can instead shift outward. This is where Purva Bhadrapada gains a lot of its infamy; Purva Bhadrapada is revered as one of the most "difficult" and "intense" nakshatras among Vedic astrologers. It is an asterism that gets approached with trepidation due to its somber imagery and associations with themes of violence, debauchery, and malevolence. The negative traits linked to Purva Bhadrapada, such as paranoia, pessimism, and hedonism, contribute to its daunting reputation. And for the most part, the fear of this nakshatra is justified. Not only are these individuals capable of doling out punishment themselves through various means like violence, manipulation, curses, etc., but they can also inadvertently bring out the self-destructive or uncontrolled nature of others. They are the types to cause deep introspection and confrontation with one's own shortcomings and fears, often acting as catalysts for irreversible transformation of character.
In terms of Purva Bhadrapada's inherently unbalanced nature, the trajectory is quite clear. These natives are not the type to do anything in moderation and often have an unstable demeanor and sense of self. They will always be pulled towards the polar extremes of anything, but they can flip on their values rapidly following any transformative event. They may occupy the deepest levels of material saturation, completely lost in chasing fame, drugs, sex, and uncontained immoral activities. Yet, paradoxically, they can also find themselves drawn to the heights of spiritual austerity, sometimes even at the same time they are trying to maximize their material standing. This innate propensity for extremes and contradiction manifests in every aspect of their lives, from their relationships, to their goals, to their beliefs, and to their actions. They are esteemed for their amiable disposition, characterized by warmth, thoughtfulness, and a selfless inclination to assist others without seeking acknowledgment. Yet, concurrently, they are often perceived as self-serving, prone to bouts of ill temper, and housing a proclivity towards ego-centricity. Despite appearing outwardly normal a lot of the time, they can be very eccentric. They are the types to lead clandestine lives, harboring secrets and maintaining hidden facets of their personalities and activities, even to those closest to them. This can make them seem nefarious and untrustworthy. Sometimes this is the case, but despite having a reputation for deceit, many of them are known to be sincere and honorable. Yet, underlying however they are being perceived is a deeper struggle to fully identify with anything. This challenge leads to inner conflicts and uncertainties, as they grapple with their sense of self and their place in the world. They are up and down, left and right, constantly in a state of internal conflict that leaves them questioning who they really are. They can feel like they don't know themselves while still being hyper-individualistic and defensive over whatever their current sense of identity is, even though it is likely to change. These contradictions reveal the complexity of their psyche, where outer appearances often mask inner conflicts and contradictory emotions and experiences. Purva Bhadrapada natives navigate the space where boundaries are starting to blur, reflecting the burgeoning singularity of existence in their minds. Due to this, sometimes they can seem like walking contradictions, embodying multiple clashing characteristics at once. For example, while they may harbor a sense of superiority over others, they can also experience deep-seated insecurity and jealousy. They can like to be critical, but cannot handle criticism. Additionally, they might demonstrate a strong desire for independence and self-reliance, yet simultaneously crave validation and approval from those around them. These conflicting traits contribute to their complex and enigmatic nature, making them intriguing yet challenging individuals to understand to others and themselves.
Purva Bhadrapada's inclination towards extremes extends to their pursuit of goals, as they approach certain tasks with unwavering ambition and dedication. They set high standards and are willing to push themselves to extreme limits to get what they want. This relentless drive for perfection and attainment can sometimes lead them to engage in behaviors that are harmful to the well-being of themselves or others, as they struggle to find balance and moderation. At this point, you may be asking, "how is that penance if they are only striving to selfishly get what they want?" Well, the painful truth about this is that they do not really want these things. They are told by others ignorant to their situation that they will be happy when they achieve some kind of abstruse goal set forth for them by society, and they are sent on a goose-chase of material ambition to achieve happiness, but this inevitably only leads to further dissatisfaction. They are met with pain, humiliation, and harsh transformation, but they keep pushing towards their aspiration of material fulfillment. It is only when they get that job, marry that partner, become famous, etc. that they realize it does not bring them happiness or fill them with the sense of purpose they crave. In fact, this realization often leads to intense anger as they confront the worthlessness of what they spent all their time chasing. The journey through Purva Bhadrapada is undeniably arduous, but that is to be expected with such a potent force. They are called to transcend their attachments, lest they be forcefully ripped away. They begin to grapple with an inescapable emptiness they feel when interacting with the world, and this can often lead them to deep feelings of nihilism. Purva Bhadrapada natives are predisposed to being unhappy, and this is not a shallow kind of unhappiness that fades based on external circumstances. Rather, it is a deeply existential depression– a feeling of confused worthlessness and dissatisfaction they often battle with for the duration of their lives. Their experiences and attachments become increasingly burdensome as they grow more aware of the fleeting nature of life. These natives will openly acknowledge the impermanence of worldly intentions, and while this can be both good or bad, it ultimately makes their minds unpredictable and unstable. With the recognition that nothing lasts forever, a new philosophy can be used to justify any action according to moral relativism. If nothing matters in the grand scheme – where whatever you do will eventually fade into obscurity, wiped away with the start of a new cycle – then anything you do doesn’t really matter in the end. This gives these natives a sense of untouchability, a feeling to do whatever they please at their most uninhibited. And it is in this stage of recognizing one’s freedom to do whatever they want is that the test to discern their one’s nature begins. When there is total freedom, the only real concern becomes about what one chooses to do with their freedom. After all, the only harm that can come from doing what you want is ultimately the result of wanting to do something harmful. Sadly, the reality is that most people are not strong enough to fully resist the temptation of evil and would fail this test. It is for this reason that this trial is exclusively administered to individuals who possess a high level of spiritual advancement found under Purva Bhadrapda. Regardless of the difficulties they face, those governed by Purva Bhadrapada have tremendous inner strength and personal resilience, which often manifests in worldly and spiritual achievement and prosperity in various facets of their lives.
Individuals born under the influence of the Purva Bhadrapada Nakshatra are inherently inclined towards detachment from external influences. This detachment often leads them down two distinct paths. Some choose to embrace a life unbound by societal norms, driven solely by their inner convictions. These individuals seek to experience life to the fullest, embracing both its joys and challenges. However, if they feel unfulfilled, they may turn to darker pursuits in search of excitement. Conversely, others utilize their detachment for spiritual advancement, renouncing materialism in favor of a disciplined quest for higher truths. In both cases, detachment becomes a defining trait, shaping their lives in divergent yet meaningful ways. Whether they become revolutionary leaders or appear lazy due to their selective motivation, their actions are stirred only by what truly invigorates their souls. Their inner character often changes with time. They can start out seeming quite innocent and fragile, and a lot of the time they will have something about them that invites torment, be it their big and eccentric personalities, their height, their weight, their looks, etc. This often leads people to perceive them as different and vulnerable. Unfortunately, this vulnerability often attracts individuals who seek to exploit, victimize, or corrupt them. There's a noticeable pattern of others attempting to take advantage of their perceived weakness, whether it be through just trying to make them feel bad, manipulating them, coercing them to do things they do not want to, or forcing them to be alone by treating them as outcasts. This predatory behavior can leave these individuals feeling isolated, betrayed, and miserable, further fueling their inner turmoil and sense of disillusionment with the world around them. However, this also serves to strengthen them. During the course of their lives, they will experience a series of external transformations that will change who they are. While their soft and innocent demeanor may still be present in some ways, there will be a new darker side to their nature. The inner transformations that Purva Bhadrapada natives undergo change them into stronger, more hardened versions of themselves. This alteration can manifest in tendencies towards violence, aggression, deceit, manipulation, etc., yet at the same time, it also equips them with the strength and capability to protect others when needed. As they navigate the complexities of life, they become formidable forces, possessing the resilience and detachment to confront challenges head-on along with the capacity to wield their strength for both good and evil.
Purva Bhadrapada natives exhibit a curious mix of flippancy and seriousness, often displaying a casual attitude towards many topics yet simultaneously exuding an air of solemnity in regards to topics concerning things like philosophical and existential inquiries. They possess a keen intellect characterized by innovation and depth of gnosis, which lends to their excellence in fields like science and research. Additionally, they are known to have an insatiable thirst for knowledge and information gathering brought about by a powerful yearning for deeper truth. While they may have a religious inclination, their focus lies more on unraveling the essence of spirituality rather than adhering rigidly to dogma. As a result of their approach to religion, they can sometimes be critical of conventional religious practices, which rely heavily on dogmatic rules and rituals. These natives are generally liberal and disdain hypocrisy as well as superficiality, valuing authenticity and depth in both thought and action, regardless of how much it clashes with anything else. Despite their show of outward confidence, they often wrestle with inner self-doubt and a crippling fear of failure, which leaves little room for optimism when they are faced with setbacks. While they typically prefer to be alone, they may inadvertently rely on others when seeking to escape the monotony of their everyday lives. This can make them seem unreliable or inconsistent when it comes to their relationships. They are driven by an innate desire to transcend mediocrity and to be perceived as exceptional. This drive for superior distinction stems from underlying feelings of insecurity and a fear of judgment, compelling them to constantly push the boundaries and strive for success through originality in all aspects of their lives. In their personal relationships, Purva Bhadrapada natives may struggle to balance their need for independence with their desire for connection. Generally, in their interactions with others, Purva Bhadrapada natives are intense yet detached. Despite their desire for authenticity and closeness in relationships, they may struggle to express their openly, fearing rejection or misunderstanding. This internal conflict between their need for connection and their fear of vulnerability can create barriers to intimacy, causing them to retreat through self-imposed isolation. Additionally, their critical nature and high standards can sometimes alienate others, as they can come across as overly judgmental or demanding of their fitness, partners, colleagues, etc. They value depth and sincerity in relationships, but sometimes it can be too much to where they end up pushing others away with their intensity. Despite these challenges, they are still often very empathetic and understanding, and they can offer support to people when needed.
Before I get into the padas, I want to give some examples. I do not want to go into much detail or take up too much time with this, but given the very complicated nature of this nakshatra, I feel that it is necessary to provide media representations for people to look into if they are interested in knowing more about how it manifests: Martin Scorsese PB Moon and Andrew Garfield PB ASC (Silence Official Trailer (2016) - Paramount Pictures), Billie Eilish PB ASC (Billie Eilish - bury a friend (Official Music Video)), Jack Black PB Moon (School of Rock (2003) Trailer #1 Movieclips Classic Trailers), Dylan O'brien PB Moon (AMERICAN ASSASSIN - Official Trailer - HD (Dylan O'Brien, Michael Keaton), Logan-Marshall Green (Upgrade Trailer #1 (2018) Movieclips Trailers), Paul Walker PB Moon (Hours TRAILER (2013) - Paul Walker Movie HD), Bill Skarsgard PB Moon (The Crow - Official Trailer (2024) Bill Skarsgård, FKA twigs, Danny Huston), Olivia Wilde PB Sun (A VIGILANTE Official HD International Trailer Starring Olivia Wilde) & (The Lazarus Effect Official Trailer #1 (2015) - Olivia Wilde, Mark Duplass Movie HD), John Stamos PB ASC (John Stamos Stars in "Secrets of Eden" Lifetime), Hozier PB Sun (the lyrics and imagery of this video are extremely Purva Bhadrapada) Hozier - Take Me To Church), Kaya Scoledario PB Sun (Spinning Out Official Trailer Netflix), Ryan Gosling PB ASC (THE FALL GUY Official Trailer 2 (Universal Studios) - HD), Camila Mendes PB Moon (Do Revenge Official Trailer Netflix), Bryan Cranston PB Sun (Breaking Bad Trailer), Sabrina Carpenter PB Moon and Milo Manheim PB Sun (Sabrina Carpenter - Feather (Official Video) Alexandra Daddario PB Sun (Anne Rice's Mayfair Witches Trailer: Starring Alexandra Daddario AMC+), Jacob Elordi PB Moon (2 HEARTS Official Trailer (2020) Jacob Elordi, Tiera Skovbye), Tom Blyth PB Moon (Billy The Kid (EPIX 2022 Series) Official Trailer), Daniel Gillies PB Sun (COMING HOME IN THE DARK Trailer (2021) Daniel Gillies Suspense Thriller Movie), Matthew Gray Gubler PB Sun (KING KNIGHT Trailer (2022) Angela Sarafyan, Matthew Gray Gubler), Jon Hamm (Corner Office (2023) Official Trailer - Jon Hamm, Danny Pudi, Sarah Gadon), Rachel Weisz PB Sun + Moon and Sam Claflin PB Moon (MY COUSIN RACHEL Official Trailer FOX Searchlight), Chris Pine PB Moon (Jack Reacher Movie Trailer), Madison Beer PB Sun (Madison Beer - Make You Mine (Official Music Video), Sharon Stone PB Sun (Basic Instinct - Trailer (1080p)), and Michael Jackson PB Moon (Michael Jackson - Thriller (Official 4K Video).
Padas
(mostly for Moon) They all tend to be skinny to middle weight until they get older, where they either become more muscular or plump/curvy.
1st – The first pada of Purva Bhadrapada, falling in the Aries Navamsa, signifies a stage of primal energy and raw ambition. With Mars as their guiding force, they exhibit a relentless drive to achieve their goals, refusing to be deterred by obstacles or setbacks. However, being the initial pada of the nakshatra just leaving the stage of Shatabhisha, this quarter is the least spiritually developed. While they may possess great worldly ambition and the capacity for success, they may also be prone to ego-driven actions and an overly narrow focus on material pursuits. They can get into occultism or spirituality, but it is usually an attempt to further themselves in the material realm. Natives born under this pada possess a combative nature, always ready to engage in confrontations to defend their beliefs or assert their dominance. They tend to be more mentally aggressive than physically, but nonetheless their volatile temperament can lead to physical disputes as well when they are provoked enough. They know they can be very damaging when they lose control, so they will do everything in their power to prevent escalation. Ironically, this can make them seem passive. They typically exhibit anxious tendencies while attempting to conceal or downplay their feelings of worry. Natives of this pada are extremely passionate, but they have a tendency to constantly compare themselves to others, which ultimately can lead them to disregard their efforts to focus on surpassing someone else's. This propensity of theirs for aggression, envy, and competitiveness can strain relationships and hinder their personal growth, as they become consumed by their own desires for dominance and validation. They are usually medium tall with a wide forehead and low eyebrows.
2nd – The second pada of Purva Bhadrapada, ruled by Venus in the Taurus Navamsa, embodies a stage of sensual indulgence and creative expression. Individuals born under this pada are drawn to the occult and mysteries of the unseen, often delving into practices such as astrology and black magic. There is a bit of detachment from the mysticism of it at this stage though. They may prefer to look at it through a scientific or philosophical perspective as opposed to one that embraces faith in the divine. While their interest in these esoteric realms may lead to proficiency in such arts, it also heightens their propensity to lose track of their life's direction, becoming absorbed in the pursuit of hidden knowledge and power. Natives of this pada are characterized by their attractive physique, with beautiful broad teeth and strikingly captivating eyes that draw others to them. They possess an innate charm that makes them highly appealing to the opposite sex, and they are not hesitant to indulge in their darker desires and fantasies. Their creativity knows no bounds, as they constantly innovate and explore new avenues of expression. However, despite their magnetic allure and creative flair, individuals of this pada are prone to indulgence and excess, particularly when it comes to satisfying their sensual appetites. Their pursuit of pleasure and gratification can sometimes lead them astray, causing them to lose sight of their responsibilities and priorities. This stage of Purva Bhadrapada is more spiritually evolved than the prior, but it is still in the accumulation phase of Aquarius and the 11th house. Despite their outward charm, they may struggle to find stability and balance in their lives. They are prone to accidents.
3rd – The third pada of Purva Bhadrapada falls in the Gemini Navamsa and is ruled by Mercury. Natives born under this pada embody the mental side of Purva Bhadrapada, which is very focused on cultivating critical reasoning and gathering information, emphasizing communication, learning, and adaptability. Individuals born under this pada are intellectually inclined, constantly seeking to expand their knowledge and understanding of the world around them. They are playful and curious by nature, approaching life with a sense of wonder and exploration. Their energy is expressed through communication and expression, as they excel in articulating their thoughts and ideas. They have a natural gift for language and may find success in fields such as writing, teaching, or public speaking. Despite their playful demeanor, they are still very serious about their pursuits, driven by a deep-seated desire for personal growth and self-improvement. Natives of this pada tend to be peaceful and honorable, seeking harmony and balance in their interactions with others. However, their mercurial nature can sometimes manifest as manipulation or deceit, particularly when they perceive it necessary to achieve their goals. Nonetheless, they are skilled at navigating social situations and may possess a knack for making money through their cleverness and resourcefulness. In terms of appearance, individuals of this pada may have gaunt lower cheeks, high cheekbones, a narrow and defined jawline, and a medium stature. These physical characteristics complement their sharp wit and agile minds, making them engaging in social settings.
4th – The fourth pada of Purva Bhadrapada is ruled by the Moon in Cancer Navamsa. This is the most spiritually advanced of all the padas and tends to be among the most intense. At this stage, individuals born under this pada have either undergone profound inner transformation, shedding their attachment to worldly desires and material gains for the sake of aligning with the cosmic order, or they have fallen for the empty temptations of material life, leading them to a deeper state of moral decay. This pada in the sequence of this nakshatra symbolizes the finalization of death, and just like when we die, the impact of our lives can no longer be altered. You are called to surrender all you have acquired to the purifying flames of the spiritual fire, relinquishing personal benefit for the greater good, and if you fail, your soul will be lost to another cycle of rebirth. This represents the height of the nakshatra's power to manifest, it can come to be either an uplifting force for individuals and humanity as a whole, or as a potentially dangerous influence. Those born under this pada are deeply engaged in their own spiritual pursuits, usually guided by a sense of purpose and higher calling. They possess an innate magnetism and power that exerts influence over others and the world around them. Despite the intensity of their spiritual journey, individuals of this pada tend to enjoy good longevity and robust health, thanks to their deep connection with the cosmic energies. They are often perceived charismatic individuals, drawing others to them with their presence. However, their innate power comes with a responsibility to wield it wisely, as they hold the potential to bring about significant positive change or destruction, depending on how they choose to channel it.
Caste
Purva Bhadrapada belongs to the Brahmin or priestly/scholarly caste. This classification is based on the inherent qualities and tendencies of individuals born under this nakshatra, rather than their family lineage, as seen in contemporary caste systems. In Vedic astrology and Hindu tradition, each nakshatra is associated with as caste, thereby linking them to specific attributes, occupations, and societal roles. Brahmin is positioned as the highest caste and is given the most power and responsibility, both socially and spiritually. In classical texts, the Brahmin caste is exalted for its dedication to scholarship, spirituality, and moral rectitude. Brahmins are depicted as the keepers of sacred knowledge, entrusted with the preservation and dissemination of ancient scriptures and teachings. They are revered for their intellectual prowess, philosophical insights, and commitment to upholding the highest ethical standards. Brahmins are expected to lead lives of austerity, simplicity, and self-discipline, setting examples of virtue and righteousness for society. Additionally, they play important roles in leading religious rituals, ceremonies, and spiritual practices, acting as intermediaries between individuals and the divine. Their contributions also extend beyond religious and intellectual realms though, as they also provide guidance, counseling, and healing to individuals and communities. Overall, Brahmins are portrayed as paragons of virtue, wisdom, and enlightenment, embodying the highest ideals of human excellence and divine knowledge as described in classical texts, acting as oases of wisdom by guiding society not only in matters of spirituality but also in areas such as literature, philosophy, and science. Their primary occupations are mostly associated with administration of all sectors of society, teaching, healing, and providing spiritual guidance. Its intersection with Aquarius Rashi on the ecliptic plane may also relate it to Kshatriya and Shudra.
Gunas
The nakshatras each represent the different gunas at different levels of functioning. For this asterism, it might be confusing to find out that, despite all of its negative connotations, it is associated primarily with Sattva or purity/balance. This mainly stems from this Nakshatra's capacity for penance, spiritualism, and generosity. Overall, Purva Bhadrapada is associated with two levels of Sattva and one of Rajas. Sattva prevails at the physical and mental levels, while Rajas predominates at the spiritual level. At the physical level, individuals born under Purva Bhadrapada exhibit qualities of purity, harmony, and balance. They are often composed, grounded, and possess a sense of stability in their physical endeavors. Mentally, they tend to exhibit clarity, wisdom, and a penchant for introspection when they are only focused on engaging their rational mind. This can get muddy when they try to incorporate less tangible aspects into their thinking though. At the spiritual level, the influence of Rajas emerges, driving them towards spiritual growth and evolution but also threatening them with the struggle of inner turmoil. With Rajas at the most personal level of the spirit, this can cause a onstant seeking pf external validation and gratification, which leads to things such as constantly chasing after fleeting desires and pleasures from their lack of contentment. Additionally, the intense drive associated with Rajas may result in overexertion, burnout, and a disregard for self-care. It can lead to an inflated ego, arrogance, and a tendency towards manipulative or self-serving behavior. Therefore, while Rajas can propel individuals towards spiritual evolution, it also poses challenges that need to be navigated with mindfulness and self-awareness. Together with the heavy influence of Sattva, Rajas in this nakshatra creates a spiritual restlessness that works to propel these natives to actively engage in spiritual practices, seeking to transcend worldly limitations and attain spiritual liberation. It comes with risk, but this is a necessary trial.
Gana
Purva Bhadrapada Nakshatra falls under the category of Manushya Gana, or "human/mixed species." This designation speaks to the inherent qualities and tendencies of individuals born under this nakshatra, aligning them with human characteristics and behaviors. People belonging to the Manushya Gana Nakshatras, including Purva Bhadrapada, place value on their self-worth and esteem. They often enjoy good physical attributes and are blessed with fortune, leading comfortable lives. With warm and friendly personalities, they exhibit care and affection towards their family, friends, and loved ones, readily offering assistance to those in need. However, they also prioritize their own interests and benefits. They are known for their warm and caring nature, and while they may appear busy if approached, they are capable of balancing their personal and professional lives effectively. The path of those born under Manushya Gana nakshatras is undefined. They possess the potential to exhibit both positive and negative qualities, akin to the diverse nature of humanity itself. They have the potential to be even more evil than the Rakshas and even more good than the Devas. While some may lean towards acts of kindness and generosity, others may display tendencies that are less altruistic. This blend of qualities makes them a complex combination qualities you might see for the Deva and Rakshasa Ganas. Keep in mind that you should look at the dominant Gana in your chart to gain a better understanding of how this may apply to you.
Thank you for taking the time to read this if you did. I will have to continue this in a third part because I'm out of room on this post. Afterwards, I will be starting on Shravana Nakshatra soon, and then later on Anuradha.

Alice Munro, winner of the 2012 Nobel Prize in Literature and one of the all-time greatest writers of short fiction, recently passed away. She's been my favourite author since I first discovered her work, so while I go through my own re-reading of her bibliography, I'll be posting semi-regularly here to talk about aspects of her work that I find absolutely brilliant.
Of everything she's written, I think that "Tell Me Yes or No," featured in Munro's 1974 collection Something I've Been Meaning to Tell You represents a perfect introduction to her writing style, the feminism of her early stories, and the way in which she uses narrative construction to explore the subjectivity of her characters. It's also has possibly the best hook for a story she's ever written, as it begins:

I persistently imagine you dead.
You told me that you loved me years ago. Years ago. And I said that I too, I was in love with you in those days. An exaggeration.

Alice Munro regularly uses second-person perspectives in her writing, but never like this. Her stories are often epistolary, with letters featuring crucially into the plots of a couple dozen I can think of off the top of my head (Friend of My Youth and Hateship, Friendship, Courtship, Loveship, Marriage are among the most effective, if you're curious). But rarely is a story directly addressed to someone by a protagonist, in the way that it is here. This story has a venom which drips from off the page.
After the narrative hook, the narratoprotagonist brusquely allows us into understanding the source of her contempt. We quickly learn how they met: she was a young mother and a University student, living with her husband in a dormitory of other married couples called The Huts; he lived there as well, as a graduate student, with a wife and child of his own. The student culture she describes is conservative and somewhat repressed: the wives/mothers of The Huts are "creatures of daily use" (87) who rise every night to insert diaphragms or to take other contraceptives, and sex has "shrunk" from an apocalyptic undertaking to another chore. Though there was "no infidelity in The Huts," and "flashes of lust" were uncommon, it is through this man that our narrator "got a glimpse of something [...] that we had not been thinking about — had put aside in your case, or not yet discovered, in mine."
And for a moment, a glimpse is all that Munro gives, as through prolepsis, the story advances to a later year and a remembered conversation, which is presumably also the time when this man told the narrator that he had been in love with her then. It's through this reminiscence that the story moves into the first moments of their emotional affair, : "We never said anything of importance. We never touched each other. [...] Next day, or the day after, when I was reading as usual on the couch, I felt myself drop a lovely distance, thinking of you, and that was the beginning, I suppose, the realization of what more there still could be." (88) Despite only a short walk across campus together during which nothing was said and no one was touched, both parties recall this moment as the significant one in their relationship. For the narrator, it has a transformative effect on her life: "This kind of tension was new to me then. I could not gauge and manipulate, as later with other men." (88) That she brings up manipulation, here, is interesting; we'll find out why, later, but I do want to highlight how Munro will sprinkle things like this into a character's narration which reveal so much of their interiority. Why is she, with this man, so concerned about being able to gauge and manipulate? And why, in the narration, does she go from kind reminiscence to immediately asking the question:

Would you like to know how I was informed of your death?

Mind, now, that it was never established until here that the person she is writing to actually is dead. In the opening, it's only an imagining, "I persistently imagine you dead." For the rest of the story it will seem as if this all is true, and that he has died; but the brilliance of the opening line, beyond its value to draw in a reader, is that now the entire narrative shifts to unstable ground. From now on every action that the narrator takes in the present could be a fantasy, or could be real. It's presented at face value: "I go into the faculty kitchen, to make myself a cup of coffee before my 10 o'clock class. Dodie Charles who is always baking something has brought a cherry pound cake. [...] It is wrapped in wax paper and then in a newspaper. [...] As I wait for my water to boil I see the small item, the modest headline, VETERAN JOURNALIST DIES. [...] Only then do I realize. Your name. The city where you lived and died. A heart attack, that will do" (88-89).
While detailing this narrative of hers, though, the narrator can't help pointing towards the invention of it all: "(The thing we old pros know about, in these fantasies, is the importance of detail, solidity; yes, a cherry pound cake)" (88). When she concludes by saying, "A heart attack, that will do," it isn't pithy, it's another aside, emphasizing the arbitrary construction of her fantasy. All right. So he's not dead. What follows, then, if not a real description of the narrator's subsequent actions, shows that a tremendous amount of thought has gone into building this fantasy. In my version of the text, the story runs from page 86-101, 15 pages; everything said so far has been to frame whatever else follows.
I'll not spend so much time close-reading from here, but briefly: the narrator mentions her habit of carrying the last letter she's received from this man in her purse; upon hearing of his death, the fact that she's not received a letter in a while suddenly resolves itself, and it's a weight off her shoulders. She confides in a coworker, a man named Gus Marks, who suggests she talk to a psychiatrist. She laughs at this, "For I am absorbed in another plan. As soon as the term ends [...] I mean to go visit you, to visit the city where you died." (90) Analepsis: the fantasy/narrative breaks for a moment once again to recall their meeting two years before, where the two confessed that they had loved each other; she learns about his wife's bookstore, he learns about her divorce; he drives her to the airport and she, "was not unhappy at the thought of never seeing you again" (91); instead of the airport, though, they arrive at a hotel together. She muses, "I loved you for linking me with my past [...] If I could kindle love then and take it now there was less waste than I had thought. [...] My life did not altogether fall away in separate pieces, lost." (92)
In the present (fantasy) she gets on the flight across the country, to city where he died. She's only been there once before (it's where they met and rekindled their romance), but now can't help searching the streets for memories of him. She recalls his character, how she saw him, and how he saw himself: "I would say that you are uncompromising [...] that there is something chivalric about you" (94); "You, on the other hand, would describe yourself as genial, corrupt, ordinarily selfish and pleasure-loving." This might be a good time to remember how the story starts, with the narrator describing her past love for him as "an exaggeration." If she was exaggerating then, she must have truly been in love with him here; which is what makes it so devastating when suddenly that love is taken away from her, with nothing to show for it but scraps of letters. "From the beginning, of course, I knew that this was a dangerous way to live," she says, and when the letters stop arriving begins seeking answers in the usual places, reading "case histories" of mistresses in women's journals, and confiding in a friend (a woman) who advises presence and living in the moment. "I have tried this, I will try anything, but I don't understand how it works." (95) So what does work for her?

I have bought a map. I have found your street, the block where your house is. [...] I don't go there yet. [...] That is a house you never meant me to see. [...] Now I can see it if I want to. [...] I go to your wife's store. That is what I can do. (95-96)

She loiters around important areas of this man's life, particularly his home and his wife's store, places that bear incredible significance to the person that she loved, but which he could never welcome her into. She mentions in an aside how these places are opposite to the ones they got to share: temporary spaces that wait for his arrival to come alive. Now she sees the wife, newly widowed in this fantasy, going about her day-to-day life. She recognizes her voice from their time together back in The Huts, and prays that she isn't recognized in turn. After a few days of loitering around the shop, though, she is confronted: "'I think I know who you are' [...] 'We've all noticed you hanging around here. At first I thought you were a shoplifter. I told everyone to keep an eye on you. But you're not a shoplifter, are you?'" (97). The woman gives her a paper bag full of letters, and smugly announces, as if we didn't know, that her husband is dead. In the bag is the record of their correspondence together, which ended when he died at his desk of that heart attack: "But then I notice that the writing is not mine. I start to read. These letters are not mine, they were not written by me." (98)
This, to me, is the true brilliance of the story. Because even if you accept that this is all a fantasy, the fact that something like this exists within that fantasy is so illuminating towards the narrator of this story. In her fantasy, she flies across the country to flaneur around the memory of the man she had an affair with. Alright. She loiters in the vision of her paramour's widow long enough to be recognized, caught, and admonished. And then she finds out that this wasn't even true: the letters aren't her own; he was having another affair with a woman named Patricia. Then, finally, she returns to the bookstore and returns the letters: "'I didn't write these letters' 'Aren't you her?' 'No. I don't know who she is. I don't know.' 'Why did you take them?' 'I didn't understand. I didn't know what you were talking about. I've had a grief lately and sometimes — I'm not paying attention.'" (99)
Her and the widow talk briefly, but they don't ultimately become friends. She walks away from the store, and, "In this city of my imagination," (100), she thinks about the other woman he was writing to: long uncombed black hair, sitting in the dark, "She confides in a woman, goes to bed with a man [...] She suffers according to rules we all know, which are meaningless and absolute." (100) This calls to mind the earlier description of nightly routines back in The Huts, of sex as an apocalypse-made-chore, and of the women who became "creatures of daily use" (87). When I talk about Alice Munro's feminism, it isn't that her characters suffer great tragedies on account of their sex. Instead they're trapped inside of metanarratives that leave them yearning for an alternative to such "meaningless and absolute" rules. Not only that, the narrator in this case tries to have a fraction of the power over this man that he's exerted, possibly without meaning to, over her:

When I think of her I see all this sort of love as you must have seen, or see it, as something going on at a distance; a strange, not even pitiable expenditure; unintelligible ceremony in an unknown faith. Am I right, am I getting close to you, is that true? (100)

She's now shifted herself into the place of the widow from earlier. She's understood him before as a lover; now she's trying to understand him as an adulterer, as someone who never took her that seriously, who possibly never loved her ("an exaggeration") as much as she knows that she loved him. More than that, she wants to get close to him, in an even more intimate way than she's ever been able to, before quickly realizing what a fool's errand that would be. Did he actually love her? He is the one who said it first. "How are we to understand you?" she asks, before withdrawing the question entirely:

Never mind. I invented her. I invented you, as far as my purposes go. I invented loving you and I invented your death. I have my tricks and my trap doors too. I don't understand their workings at the present moment, but I have to be careful, I won't speak against them. (101)

One thing I love about this story is how playful it is, despite the tone never shifting too far away from the contemptuous frustration of the opening passage. The more I read it (and I've probably read this more than any other Munro story), the more details I find to pick out in its construction, of how Alice Munro layered in all these details both to sell the fantasy of her character, and also the character herself. Talking to a man within the fantasy about how she really ought to speak to a psychiatrist reads to me now like Munro having fun with her protagonist's obsession. But I also love that this story is never presented as a woman losing control of herself, even though that would be so easy to do. By allowing the fantasy narrative to be as real as the "true" memories presented alongside of it, she never comes off as irrational or manic, or even jilted until the very end of it, even though to construct such a narrative, with such attention-to-detail and so many layers of fantasy does betray a person who is not coping with loss as well as she claims to be.
It's a strikingly real portrait of a strikingly plausible woman, who married young and therefore never experienced her idea of a romance until years later, rekindling with a man she briefly knew, only for him to disappear from her life again just as quickly. Twice, now, her life had been upended because he showed her something else from the life she had been living; but at the same time, he never truly fit into the narrative of her own life.
Along those lines, there are also a lot of details conspicuously missing from this story about the narrator's life apart from this man: her divorce is briefly mentioned, and experiences with other men; but we never know how much this affair factored into any of those relationships besides a guess at what may have been awakened. We see very little of her as a mother, except that she was pushing a stroller home from the drug store when they first met, and that their romance starts shortly after both her children are away at college themselves for the first time. It's not that any of these details are particularly relevant; I think it's actually interesting how irrelevant they are. One thing that the narrator is trying to do throughout the story is contextualize her feelings for this man within some idea of a life-story. Instead, what we're given is a fractured narrative, with only brief glimpses of real shared moments together, held together by a fantasy in which she portrays both the spurned lover and the homewrecker. The only way she can continue on with her life, therefore, is to persistently imagine him dead.
What Alice Munro does with narrative, in such a short-form as her stories take, is absolutely brilliant. I can't recommend enough picking up a collection of hers, opening to any story she's written, and see how effortlessly she manipulates time, memory and fantasy to suit the needs of the characters she's trying to create. This story ends with the admission that this man who the narrator's addressing is, for her own purposes, basically fictional. She will never understand him. Any love that she had for him couldn't possibly be real under such conditions. And yet, she did love him, despite being an invention, despite her own fantasy.
Because how else could you love a person, or even begin understanding a person, unless they were a little bit fictional to you, existing just a little bit within your imagination?

Hi I'm a 20M born in a Christian family. Growing up, my mom and dad were(still are) good Christians. We always had and still have enough and people often told me how much they admire my family for their attitudes, work ethic and humbleness. It's really something to be proud of.
But I'm not like them.
I have a pretty good relationship with most people, I'd say, although, I had a bit difficult childhood considering my ignorance. No matter how young I was, I was proud and ignorant. If I said so, then ought to be so. What I didn't understand was how deep I was indulging in pride that now I feel like I'm paying for it.
I don't understand why I keep repeating my sins, 'intentionally'.
Ofcourse we all need God's grace and the more we understand how shameful our lifestyles are without Jesus the more we open our hearts.
But here's the problem, I don't seem to be reaching anywhere. I don't like reading my Bible, I don't want to stop sinning, I crave this and that and I'm tired of it. I want to lean from my mistakes but I'm not and I'm frustrated.

Xuefeng
First of all, we have to admit that the Bible is the accomplishment of the Ephraim which loyally records the Jewish history, explains the relationship between the God, Devil and human beings to the furthest degree, and gives the direction the human beings should take.
The Bible, the Koran, the Buddhist Scripture and the Tao Te Ching are the eternal and effective treasures and collections of human wisdom, teaching us how to behave and develop into the higher level of life space.
“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth”. The first sentence in the Bible did tell the truth. But the things covered by the cossack may not be the holly things. And the people wearing the sacred cassock may not be the abbot.
The problem with the Bible is that the God it introduces is not the genuine Greatest Creator.
We have known that the Greatest Creator has the 8 features. The Greatest Creator is unique and exclusive, amorphous, neutral, mysterious, impartial, merciful, supremely powerful and intelligent. The wisdom of the Greatest Creator is revealed through its creation of universe order, designing of LIFE program and knowing of the past and the future.
Then, does the God in the Bible have the above-mentioned 8 features?
Let’s explain this with examples.
The Betrayal of Adam and Eve
According to the Genesis, Adam and Eve were instigated to eat the fruit on the Wisdom Tree forbidden by the God in the Bible. Because they have violated the order of the God (in the Bible), they were repelled out of the Eden.
It indicates that the God in the Bible is a. incompetent; b. improvident; and c. unjust.
He is incompetent because he was a loser at the beginning. The first couple of human he created betrayed him. So can we still say it is supremely powerful?
Can we still believe in a “person” who often loses? The Great Flood had killed most of the human beings. What happened to them afterwards? They still wouldn’t listen to his words. The Moses Ten Commandments are actually the directives of the God in the Bible. Can you tell me how many of them are obeyed by the human being? Actually not even one. The God in the Bible seemed to know nothing about how to control the human beings. The only measure it takes is to voice warnings and threats against the human beings. Thousands of years has passed, the human beings remain the same. Is there no means to control the human beings? Or is there some other force constraining this Almighty God? If this is the case, is this God not sole or exclusive? For thousands of years, the human beings have been violating hisorder. What is he waiting for?
The God in the Bible is improvident because he didn’t know that Adam and Eve were going to betray him or the development trend of what he had created. Is this God, who is not able to predict the future or the past, still reliable? If the Earth is going to get out of the Solar System and this God knows nothing about it, how can he save the human beings? How can this GOD administer the deities, Buddha, celestial beings and Devils when he found it difficult to control the human beings? How can he manage the spacious Universe?
The God in the Bible is unjust because it cannot tell wrong from the right and because it is unreasonable.
Why would Adam and Eve betray the God in the Bible? There are three major reasons. First, the genetic structure of Adam and Eve had faults, or was imperfect. The life created by this God was now its own constraint. This angered the God very much. It is just like the house built by an architect who put every efforts was fallen and hit his own feet. Is the house or the architect that should be blamed?
The second reason they betrayed is that they were instigated and seduced by the snake. Adam and Eve are humans while behind the snake was the Devil Satan. The energy and wisdom of human beings can’t match those of the Devil. This God didn’t punish the Devil Satan. Instead, it imposed inflictions on Adam and Eve and drove them out of Eden. Is it fair? If a rapist raped an 8-year-old girl, would it be fair to blame the girl for her sexual organ and weakness instead of bringing justice to the rapist?
The third reason of betrayal, which is also the most important one, is the damned Wisdom Tree that can tell the good and evil. Who has planted it in the Eden and why? It’s just like putting a poisonous sweet on the dinner table for the kids. Or it’s like playing the porn video for the young girls while teaching them to retain their innocence. Would a moral person do such a thing? Isn’t this “person” who planted the Wisdom Tree in the Eden has caused the betrayal of Adam and Eve?
Besides, does this God, who had created Adam and Eve, has other measures to take rather than driving Adam and Eve out of the Eden? Is it fair not to give them a second chance simply because they have made only one mistake? Does one mistake justify their life-long sins?
Jesus came to the Mortal World to atone for the human beings’ sins. According to the Bible, all the people have their “original sin”. Where does the “original sin” come from? Actually, they are inherited from Adam and Eve, the ancestors of human beings, whose sins were formed because they had eaten the fruit on the damned Wisdom Tree.
When we are born, we have the “original sin” inherited from Adam and Eve. The “cross” on our back was much too heavy. According to this logic, “the son of a thief is always a thief”, “the son of a criminal is always a criminal”, and “the son of an emperor is always an emperor”. That’s why in ancient China, in the feudal period in particular, “If a man committed crime, all his family members would be sentenced to death”, or “If a man attained the Tao, even his pets ascended to Heaven”. This also explains why the thrones can only be passed on to the next generations of royal families. This is because it complies with the logic in the Bible.
If somebody has sins, the God in the Bible and the Satan sined first. Is it humanitarian to inflict on billions of humans throughout the history simply because of the wrongdoings of Adam and Eve? Why not executing Adam and Eve and creating a new pair of humans at the time? Is creating a new couple so difficult for the God in the Bible?
All the people are born with sins. This is why each of us comes to the Mortal World to endure the sufferings. But the sins are not inherited from our ancestors. They are made by oursleves in the previous cycle of life. If we don’t have sins, we would all have become Buddha or celestial beings.
Ten Plagues of Egypt
According to the Exodus, when Moses and Aaron, in the capacity of the GOD in the Bible, asked the Egyptian Pharaoh to let the Israelis leave Egypt, they were refused. Consequently, the GOD in the Bible imposed 10 plagues on Egypt. 1. Plague of Blood The water of the Nile will be changed into blood. The fish in the Nile will die, and the river will stink; the Egyptians will not be able to drink its water. 2. Plague of Frogs. The Nile will teem with frogs. They will come up into your palace and your bedroom and onto your bed, into the houses of your officials and on your people, and into your ovens and kneading troughs. The frogs will go up on you and your people and all your officials. 3. Plague of Lice.The dust of the ground became lice, lice came upon men and animals. All the dust throughout the land of Egypt became lice. 4. Plague of Flies The houses of the Egyptians will be full of flies, and even the ground where they are. 5. Plague of Livestock Death The fifth plague of Egypt was an epidemic disease which exterminated the Egyptian livestock; that is, horses, donkeys, camels, cattle, sheep and goats; 6. Plague of Boils The sixth plague of Egypt was Shkhin. The Shkhin was a kind of skin disease, usually translated as "boils".; 7. Plague of Hail The seventh plague of Egypt was a destructive storm; 8. Plague of Locusts Locusts will devour what little you have left after the hail, including every tree that is growing in your fields.; 9. Plague of Darkness Total darkness covered all Egypt for three days 10. Death of the Firstborn The tenth and final plague of Egypt was the death of all first born in Egypt — no one escaped, from the lowest servant to Pharaoh's own first-born son, including first-born of livestock.
It is understandable that the God punished Egypt because Egyptian Pharaoh wouldn’t obey his order. However, it was unreasonable and went too far to kill the first-born of all humans and animals in Egypt. You can punish the Egyptian Pharaoh for his disobedience. Why inflicting on the common people? Even worse, the God would kill the kids of the girl slaves working as donkeys in the lowest rank. Can we still say the God behaving like this merciful? It was behaving without humanitarianism just like a Devil.
Even more abominable, the Pharaoh of Egypt wouldn’t let the Israelis leave mainly because the God had hardened the Pharaoh’s heart. Before the Ten Plagues came, the God in the Bible had done something. According to 7:3 in the Exodus, Jehovah told Moses, “And I will harden Pharaoh's heart, and multiply my signs and my wonders in the land of Egypt.”
It means the God in the Bible had prepared a trap for the Egyptians, trying to find an excuse for the following plagues. In Exodus 8:19, “Then the magicians said to Pharaoh, "This is the finger of God." But Pharaoh's heart was hardened, and he did not listen to them, as the LORD had said.”. In Exodus 9:35, “And the heart of Pharaoh was hardened, neither would he let the children of Israel go; as the LORD had spoken by Moses.” In Exodus 10:20, “But the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, so that he would not let the children of Israel go.” In Exodus 10:27, “But the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, and he would not let them go.” In Exodus 11:10, “And Moses and Aaron did all these wonders before Pharaoh: and the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, so that he would not let the children of Israel go out of his land.”
It was the God in the Bible who let the Israelis leave Egypt. But it was the same God who had hardened the Pharaoh’s heart and sparked the conflicts so that the Israelis couldn’t leave Egypt easily. So what the God in the Bible was doing? It was encouraging the people to revolt while telling the authorities about the revolt and encouraging the government to oppress them mercilessly. Isn’t such a person a schemer and two-faced?
So is this the image of the Greatest Creator?
The Israelis Are the People of the Covenant
The Bible has the Old Testament and the New Testament. The part telling what happened before Jesus was born was called the Old Testament and the part telling things after Jesus was born was the New Testament. The Testament actually means agreement, covenant, and contract. The whole Bible is the agreement, covenant and contract between the Israelis and the Greatest Creator.
So here is a paradox. There are over 3,000 nations in the world and why the God has established the Testament with the Israelis? Does this mean the other nations are not the subjects of the God? If they are, why has the God only established the Testament with the Israelis while neglecting all the other nations? If they are not, what’s the origin of all the other nations? Are Adam and Eve only the ancestors of Israelis and not the other nations? The Israelis are created by the God. Does it mean the other nations are created by the Devil?
There are 1,656 years between the Genesis and the Great Flood. There are 857 years between the Great Flood and the Exodus. There are 396 years between the Exodus and the founding of the Israeli State. There are 510 years between the founding of the Israeli State and their captive to Babylon. There are 152 years between their imprisonment in Babylon and the reestablishment of Jerusalem. There are 450 years between the rebuilding of Jerusalem and the birth of Jesus. There are 2003 years between the birth of Jesus and today. So according to the Bible, the history of human beings is about 6,376 years.
According to the Bible, there were only 8 people survived the Great Flood on the Earth. They were the couple of Noah, their three sons and their wives. It means that 4,700 years ago, there was no one else living on the Earth except for the Noah family.
But this has brought some other questions. First, where do the American Indians come from? According to the theory of Continental Drift, America drifted away from the other continents. But it couldn’t happen within 4,700 years of time. Then how the Noah family reached America from the Middle East? After the Great Flood, there were only 8 members in Noah family. It was impossible for them to get dispersed. Noah couldn’t let one of his sons and his wife to cross the freezing Siberia and the Bering Strait to get to America.
Second, where did the African blacks come from? From the perspective of genetics, the blacks, yellows and whites have their separate ancestors. A couple of pure whites couldn’t generate the blacks and yellows. Even the evolvement couldn’t produce the blacks and yellows in 3,700 years of time. Besides, according to Darwin’s evolutionary theory, the survival of the fittest, could the Israelis able to write the Bible evolve into the African blacks? The blacks are not the matches of Israelis in the intelligence no matter how we exaggerate their abilities.
Now let’s come to the Chinese nation. The first Chinese King was born about 4,600 years ago. The story of Dayu‘s Flood Control happened about 4,200 years ago. It was impossible for the future generations of Noah to come to mainland China 100 years after the Great Flood. Even if they did it, how could they produce so many people who followed Dayu to control the flood?
Where does the Chinese nation come from? Are the Flood Control by Dayu were just the Great Flood?
From the perspective of the Bible, the biological evolutionary theory could never be accepted. But once we accepted the theory, it would deny the theory that the God created the human beings. But if we denied the evolutionary theory, there was no way to explain the origin of the blacks and yellows and we can’t say Adam and Eve are the common ancestors of all human beings.
The Story of Cain
The first child of Adam and Eve, after they were driven out of the Eden, was Cain, followed by Abel. “And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD. And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering: But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect.” Out of jealousy, Cain killed his brother Abel.
We want to ask the God in the Bible some questions, “Why do you favor the offerings of Abel instead of those of Cain? Is Cain killing his brother Abel not your fault? If you had never favored one of them, how could it arouse the jealousy of Cain? Why the people created by you had so many troubles? Adam and Eve wouldn’t follow your orders and their kids killed each other. As the God, you don’t have the ability to solve these problems? Or is it what you have designed?
Cain was a murderer and deserved the punishment. But you told Cain, “Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.”
So what kind of the justice standard is it? It is hardly understandable not to levy the punishment on the criminal. But it is even more understandable to have revenge of sevenfold on those who would punish the criminal. Is it protecting the criminal?
That’s why the few thousand years of human history were full of blood, violence and crime. The God in the Bible has been protecting the criminals.
“Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.” Because Cain is a criminal, we can fully understand it as ““Therefore whosoever slayeth the criminal, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.””
We can conclude we had better become criminals because the criminals are protected and the good men are not. The good men have the risk of being revenged sevenfold.
The Prophet and the Dream
In the Bible, there are a large number of prophets and dreams. The prophets are the representatives of the God in the Mortal World. They have unimaginable wisdom and power, which sink the average people with average wisdom into the mist. If someone says, “I am a prophet”, should we believe him or not. If we don’t, we are standing against the God. If we do, how can we know the prophet is a fake or not?
Now let’s talk about the dreams. There are many dreams and dream analysis in the Bible, in particular in the Revelation. Of course, those who can analyze the dreams are all prophets. But they have also brought a lot of puzzles.
First, has the prophet had the dream at all? No one could see his dream and he could well compose some dreams and cheat us. If he really had the dream, was his analysis correct, or was he analyzing the dream on the reverse aspect?
I want to ask the God in the Bible, in the Old Testament, you used to talk directly with the human beings. Then why you stopped doing so later? Are the Adam and Eve on other planets also disobeying your orders? Why would you warn the human beings in the form of dreams? Why not tell us the truth directly? Don’t you have the ability to do so? Don’t you have time? Don you have some secret sorrow?
I can give many other examples to state that the God in the Bible does not have the features of being unique and exclusive, amorphous, neutral, mysterious, impartial, supremely powerful, merciful and wise as genuine Greatest Creator has.
So we can affirm that “the God in the Bible is not the genuine Greatest Creator”.

Xuefeng First of all, we have to admit that the Bible is the accomplishment of the Ephraim which loyally records the Jewish history, explains the relationship between the God, Devil and human beings to the furthest degree, and gives the direction the human beings should take. The Bible, the Koran, the Buddhist Scripture and the Tao Te Ching are the eternal and effective treasures and collections of human wisdom, teaching us how to behave and develop into the higher level of life space. “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth”. The first sentence in the Bible did tell the truth. But the things covered by the cossack may not be the holly things. And the people wearing the sacred cassock may not be the abbot. The problem with the Bible is that the God it introduces is not the genuine Greatest Creator. We have known that the Greatest Creator has the 8 features. The Greatest Creator is unique and exclusive, amorphous, neutral, mysterious, impartial, merciful, supremely powerful and intelligent. The wisdom of the Greatest Creator is revealed through its creation of universe order, designing of LIFE program and knowing of the past and the future. Then, does the God in the Bible have the above-mentioned 8 features? Let’s explain this with examples. The Betrayal of Adam and Eve According to the Genesis, Adam and Eve were instigated to eat the fruit on the Wisdom Tree forbidden by the God in the Bible. Because they have violated the order of the God (in the Bible), they were repelled out of the Eden. It indicates that the God in the Bible is a. incompetent; b. improvident; and c. unjust. He is incompetent because he was a loser at the beginning. The first couple of human he created betrayed him. So can we still say it is supremely powerful? Can we still believe in a “person” who often loses? The Great Flood had killed most of the human beings. What happened to them afterwards? They still wouldn’t listen to his words. The Moses Ten Commandments are actually the directives of the God in the Bible. Can you tell me how many of them are obeyed by the human being? Actually not even one. The God in the Bible seemed to know nothing about how to control the human beings. The only measure it takes is to voice warnings and threats against the human beings. Thousands of years has passed, the human beings remain the same. Is there no means to control the human beings? Or is there some other force constraining this Almighty God? If this is the case, is this God not sole or exclusive? For thousands of years, the human beings have been violating hisorder. What is he waiting for? The God in the Bible is improvident because he didn’t know that Adam and Eve were going to betray him or the development trend of what he had created. Is this God, who is not able to predict the future or the past, still reliable? If the Earth is going to get out of the Solar System and this God knows nothing about it, how can he save the human beings? How can this GOD administer the deities, Buddha, celestial beings and Devils when he found it difficult to control the human beings? How can he manage the spacious Universe? The God in the Bible is unjust because it cannot tell wrong from the right and because it is unreasonable. Why would Adam and Eve betray the God in the Bible? There are three major reasons. First, the genetic structure of Adam and Eve had faults, or was imperfect. The life created by this God was now its own constraint. This angered the God very much. It is just like the house built by an architect who put every efforts was fallen and hit his own feet. Is the house or the architect that should be blamed? The second reason they betrayed is that they were instigated and seduced by the snake. Adam and Eve are humans while behind the snake was the Devil Satan. The energy and wisdom of human beings can’t match those of the Devil. This God didn’t punish the Devil Satan. Instead, it imposed inflictions on Adam and Eve and drove them out of Eden. Is it fair? If a rapist raped an 8-year-old girl, would it be fair to blame the girl for her sexual organ and weakness instead of bringing justice to the rapist? The third reason of betrayal, which is also the most important one, is the damned Wisdom Tree that can tell the good and evil. Who has planted it in the Eden and why? It’s just like putting a poisonous sweet on the dinner table for the kids. Or it’s like playing the porn video for the young girls while teaching them to retain their innocence. Would a moral person do such a thing? Isn’t this “person” who planted the Wisdom Tree in the Eden has caused the betrayal of Adam and Eve? Besides, does this God, who had created Adam and Eve, has other measures to take rather than driving Adam and Eve out of the Eden? Is it fair not to give them a second chance simply because they have made only one mistake? Does one mistake justify their life-long sins? Jesus came to the Mortal World to atone for the human beings’ sins. According to the Bible, all the people have their “original sin”. Where does the “original sin” come from? Actually, they are inherited from Adam and Eve, the ancestors of human beings, whose sins were formed because they had eaten the fruit on the damned Wisdom Tree. When we are born, we have the “original sin” inherited from Adam and Eve. The “cross” on our back was much too heavy. According to this logic, “the son of a thief is always a thief”, “the son of a criminal is always a criminal”, and “the son of an emperor is always an emperor”. That’s why in ancient China, in the feudal period in particular, “If a man committed crime, all his family members would be sentenced to death”, or “If a man attained the Tao, even his pets ascended to Heaven”. This also explains why the thrones can only be passed on to the next generations of royal families. This is because it complies with the logic in the Bible. If somebody has sins, the God in the Bible and the Satan sined first. Is it humanitarian to inflict on billions of humans throughout the history simply because of the wrongdoings of Adam and Eve? Why not executing Adam and Eve and creating a new pair of humans at the time? Is creating a new couple so difficult for the God in the Bible? All the people are born with sins. This is why each of us comes to the Mortal World to endure the sufferings. But the sins are not inherited from our ancestors. They are made by oursleves in the previous cycle of life. If we don’t have sins, we would all have become Buddha or celestial beings. Ten Plagues of Egypt According to the Exodus, when Moses and Aaron, in the capacity of the GOD in the Bible, asked the Egyptian Pharaoh to let the Israelis leave Egypt, they were refused. Consequently, the GOD in the Bible imposed 10 plagues on Egypt. 1. Plague of Blood The water of the Nile will be changed into blood. The fish in the Nile will die, and the river will stink; the Egyptians will not be able to drink its water. 2. Plague of Frogs. The Nile will teem with frogs. They will come up into your palace and your bedroom and onto your bed, into the houses of your officials and on your people, and into your ovens and kneading troughs. The frogs will go up on you and your people and all your officials. 3. Plague of Lice.The dust of the ground became lice, lice came upon men and animals. All the dust throughout the land of Egypt became lice. 4. Plague of Flies The houses of the Egyptians will be full of flies, and even the ground where they are. 5. Plague of Livestock Death The fifth plague of Egypt was an epidemic disease which exterminated the Egyptian livestock; that is, horses, donkeys, camels, cattle, sheep and goats; 6. Plague of Boils The sixth plague of Egypt was Shkhin. The Shkhin was a kind of skin disease, usually translated as "boils".; 7. Plague of Hail The seventh plague of Egypt was a destructive storm; 8. Plague of Locusts Locusts will devour what little you have left after the hail, including every tree that is growing in your fields.; 9. Plague of Darkness Total darkness covered all Egypt for three days 10. Death of the Firstborn The tenth and final plague of Egypt was the death of all first born in Egypt — no one escaped, from the lowest servant to Pharaoh's own first-born son, including first-born of livestock. It is understandable that the God punished Egypt because Egyptian Pharaoh wouldn’t obey his order. However, it was unreasonable and went too far to kill the first-born of all humans and animals in Egypt. You can punish the Egyptian Pharaoh for his disobedience. Why inflicting on the common people? Even worse, the God would kill the kids of the girl slaves working as donkeys in the lowest rank. Can we still say the God behaving like this merciful? It was behaving without humanitarianism just like a Devil. Even more abominable, the Pharaoh of Egypt wouldn’t let the Israelis leave mainly because the God had hardened the Pharaoh’s heart. Before the Ten Plagues came, the God in the Bible had done something. According to 7:3 in the Exodus, Jehovah told Moses, “And I will harden Pharaoh's heart, and multiply my signs and my wonders in the land of Egypt.” It means the God in the Bible had prepared a trap for the Egyptians, trying to find an excuse for the following plagues. In Exodus 8:19, “Then the magicians said to Pharaoh, "This is the finger of God." But Pharaoh's heart was hardened, and he did not listen to them, as the LORD had said.”. In Exodus 9:35, “And the heart of Pharaoh was hardened, neither would he let the children of Israel go; as the LORD had spoken by Moses.” In Exodus 10:20, “But the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, so that he would not let the children of Israel go.” In Exodus 10:27, “But the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, and he would not let them go.” In Exodus 11:10, “And Moses and Aaron did all these wonders before Pharaoh: and the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, so that he would not let the children of Israel go out of his land.” It was the God in the Bible who let the Israelis leave Egypt. But it was the same God who had hardened the Pharaoh’s heart and sparked the conflicts so that the Israelis couldn’t leave Egypt easily. So what the God in the Bible was doing? It was encouraging the people to revolt while telling the authorities about the revolt and encouraging the government to oppress them mercilessly. Isn’t such a person a schemer and two-faced? So is this the image of the Greatest Creator? The Israelis Are the People of the Covenant The Bible has the Old Testament and the New Testament. The part telling what happened before Jesus was born was called the Old Testament and the part telling things after Jesus was born was the New Testament. The Testament actually means agreement, covenant, and contract. The whole Bible is the agreement, covenant and contract between the Israelis and the Greatest Creator. So here is a paradox. There are over 3,000 nations in the world and why the God has established the Testament with the Israelis? Does this mean the other nations are not the subjects of the God? If they are, why has the God only established the Testament with the Israelis while neglecting all the other nations? If they are not, what’s the origin of all the other nations? Are Adam and Eve only the ancestors of Israelis and not the other nations? The Israelis are created by the God. Does it mean the other nations are created by the Devil? There are 1,656 years between the Genesis and the Great Flood. There are 857 years between the Great Flood and the Exodus. There are 396 years between the Exodus and the founding of the Israeli State. There are 510 years between the founding of the Israeli State and their captive to Babylon. There are 152 years between their imprisonment in Babylon and the reestablishment of Jerusalem. There are 450 years between the rebuilding of Jerusalem and the birth of Jesus. There are 2003 years between the birth of Jesus and today. So according to the Bible, the history of human beings is about 6,376 years. According to the Bible, there were only 8 people survived the Great Flood on the Earth. They were the couple of Noah, their three sons and their wives. It means that 4,700 years ago, there was no one else living on the Earth except for the Noah family. But this has brought some other questions. First, where do the American Indians come from? According to the theory of Continental Drift, America drifted away from the other continents. But it couldn’t happen within 4,700 years of time. Then how the Noah family reached America from the Middle East? After the Great Flood, there were only 8 members in Noah family. It was impossible for them to get dispersed. Noah couldn’t let one of his sons and his wife to cross the freezing Siberia and the Bering Strait to get to America. Second, where did the African blacks come from? From the perspective of genetics, the blacks, yellows and whites have their separate ancestors. A couple of pure whites couldn’t generate the blacks and yellows. Even the evolvement couldn’t produce the blacks and yellows in 3,700 years of time. Besides, according to Darwin’s evolutionary theory, the survival of the fittest, could the Israelis able to write the Bible evolve into the African blacks? The blacks are not the matches of Israelis in the intelligence no matter how we exaggerate their abilities. Now let’s come to the Chinese nation. The first Chinese King was born about 4,600 years ago. The story of Dayu‘s Flood Control happened about 4,200 years ago. It was impossible for the future generations of Noah to come to mainland China 100 years after the Great Flood. Even if they did it, how could they produce so many people who followed Dayu to control the flood? Where does the Chinese nation come from? Are the Flood Control by Dayu were just the Great Flood? From the perspective of the Bible, the biological evolutionary theory could never be accepted. But once we accepted the theory, it would deny the theory that the God created the human beings. But if we denied the evolutionary theory, there was no way to explain the origin of the blacks and yellows and we can’t say Adam and Eve are the common ancestors of all human beings. The Story of Cain The first child of Adam and Eve, after they were driven out of the Eden, was Cain, followed by Abel. “And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD. And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering: But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect.” Out of jealousy, Cain killed his brother Abel. We want to ask the God in the Bible some questions, “Why do you favor the offerings of Abel instead of those of Cain? Is Cain killing his brother Abel not your fault? If you had never favored one of them, how could it arouse the jealousy of Cain? Why the people created by you had so many troubles? Adam and Eve wouldn’t follow your orders and their kids killed each other. As the God, you don’t have the ability to solve these problems? Or is it what you have designed? Cain was a murderer and deserved the punishment. But you told Cain, “Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.” So what kind of the justice standard is it? It is hardly understandable not to levy the punishment on the criminal. But it is even more understandable to have revenge of sevenfold on those who would punish the criminal. Is it protecting the criminal? That’s why the few thousand years of human history were full of blood, violence and crime. The God in the Bible has been protecting the criminals. “Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.” Because Cain is a criminal, we can fully understand it as ““Therefore whosoever slayeth the criminal, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.”” We can conclude we had better become criminals because the criminals are protected and the good men are not. The good men have the risk of being revenged sevenfold. The Prophet and the Dream In the Bible, there are a large number of prophets and dreams. The prophets are the representatives of the God in the Mortal World. They have unimaginable wisdom and power, which sink the average people with average wisdom into the mist. If someone says, “I am a prophet”, should we believe him or not. If we don’t, we are standing against the God. If we do, how can we know the prophet is a fake or not? Now let’s talk about the dreams. There are many dreams and dream analysis in the Bible, in particular in the Revelation. Of course, those who can analyze the dreams are all prophets. But they have also brought a lot of puzzles. First, has the prophet had the dream at all? No one could see his dream and he could well compose some dreams and cheat us. If he really had the dream, was his analysis correct, or was he analyzing the dream on the reverse aspect? I want to ask the God in the Bible, in the Old Testament, you used to talk directly with the human beings. Then why you stopped doing so later? Are the Adam and Eve on other planets also disobeying your orders? Why would you warn the human beings in the form of dreams? Why not tell us the truth directly? Don’t you have the ability to do so? Don’t you have time? Don you have some secret sorrow? I can give many other examples to state that the God in the Bible does not have the features of being unique and exclusive, amorphous, neutral, mysterious, impartial, supremely powerful, merciful and wise as genuine Greatest Creator has. So we can affirm that “the God in the Bible is not the genuine Greatest Creator”.

General
I am looking for a lady between 28 and 35 years old, for a committed monogamous childfree relationship. My goal is to become a true team, supporting each other, caring for each other, nurturing each other and helping each other grow and realise our goals and dreams as much as possible. I'm hoping to find someone that values a relationship as much as I do and takes it seriously. It's not the only thing my life revolves around, but it's also not just something 'nice to have' for me.
I tried to be as concise as possible while still providing what details I think are crucial to know; I realise this post turned out very long, but I prefer those because I can get as good an idea as possible with detailed descriptions, bar actually talking to the person, and find that very valuable, so if that also applies to you, that would be awesome.
Basics
I am 186cm tall, slim/fit built, dark brown hair, brown eyes. Both my arms are tattooed (full sleeve), as are my calves and the areas above my ankles. Regarding pictures see below. I am a runner (ranging from 5k to full marathon), training multiple times a week. I'm also vegan. My love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation. While I am mostly securely attached, withdrawing from me triggers anxiety and I have made a horrible experience with a fearful avoidant partner in the past, so that is something I fear I cannot deal with again.
I am also an atheist.
I am a very warm, soft and sensitive person, I think I am humorous, I am self reflecting a lot and I can also be really passionate and romantic. Those are traits that also are really important to me in a woman.
I can be quite social, I am a good talker, but also love to listen to really get to know someone on a deeper level. I can enjoy an evening out with friends just as much as the silence of sitting at the shores of the river and watching the sunset in solitude (although I've been craving to watch it together with a partner for a really long time now). I can be out in a pub, at a rave, a metal show or in the stadium watching football and have the time of my life, but I cannot do these things every day; I need recharge time (on the sofa, in the woods for a run, a lazy Sunday staying in bed etc.). This should give you an idea; basically, I am a homebody that thoroughly enjoys going out in moderation.
I won't say too much about hobbies; suffice it to say I am into the dark, the obscure, the macabre, the occult, the mysterious, the erotic. It won't surprise you that I had a gothic phase in my youth, bonus points if you did too!
What I am looking for
Although similar hobbies and interests are a plus (and there have to be at least a couple things we have in common), emotional and sexual compatibility are more important to me. I am a very sensitive and emotional person (I do cry easily and by this point I don't think I'll ever be able to change that, sorry), so if you're too, we will definitely understand each other. I need someone who I can open up to (which I do rather quickly, anyway), be myself, bare my soul to and I need these things from you, too. I've had my share of emotionally unavailable women who were afraid of intimacy so I know I can't deal with that again because of the way how those things affect me. I am always emotionally invested with the woman I pursue and in those cases that was to my detriment. But my ability to feel so deep is also something I wouldn't want to change because as of yet, although it's getting harder, I haven't given up on finding someone.
With those emotional needs come two requirements that I found to be vital over the years: First, being able to be silly and cutesy together and to accept each other's inner child and care for it. I am not talking about having to deal with another person's immaturity or inability to perform basic adult skills, rather with the way sadness, hurt, anxiety and being overwhelmed manifests for me (and maybe for you, too?). I need someone who is able to comfort me, to hold me, to allow me to be weak and needy for a while until I've calmed down, and I'm more than ready to offer the same. Your inner child can come out for a while, no problem (: Also in a positive way: Thankfully, today everyone seems to be understanding of the cuteness overload cats (or any animal baby, really) can cause; I need that with a partner. I also still have plushies as comfort animals (some of which in quite a litteral sense as they make for really amazing pillows) and ideally, you do too.
There is a saying that in every relationship, one person is the stronger one. In the past, I have been with women who obviously were stronger than me, but that doesn't mean they always had to be strong, far from it. I certainly, like I said, need to be able to feel protected, but it's not like I'm a particularly needy partner, like everyone, I have my ups and downs, but I can pull my weight and have been told by past partners that I am very caring and that they felt safe and understood with me, and providing that for my partner is really important for me as well – this just to put the picture I'm (somewhat haphazardly) trying to paint into perspective.
Second, sexual compatibility. I have a high libido and I have kinks, so you should, too, in order that we can explore and enjoy them together. I found out how fulfilling living out those fantasies can be after years of never being able to try and in a relationship, sexual fulfillment for both partners is a must for me. Someone on here has coined the term 'filthy best friends and partners' which I have no shame to be stealing because it's such an apt description.
I'm looking for a balance between healthy independence and being emotionally present. A relationship where we 'get' each other; we're both each other's number one and treat each other like royalty. Where a disagreement leads to more intimacy between us as we understand better, not to resentment. Where we're comfortable baring our souls to each other, becoming a safe haven and secure base for each other. I don't like the modern notion that you 'should never feel too safe in a relationship' because that sounds like running from the mafia (and believe me, I love mafia movies); you should always put in effort, yes, but safety is one of the things I always want to experience and provide in a relationship. We shouldn't fear that a disagreement leads straight to breakup. I know ‘self-sufficiency’ is trending right now, but I feel like as partners, we’re partly responsible for each other and not our own but also each other’s happiness. Being dependant and dependable at the same time is important; making each other’s wellbeing a priority. I love the relationship model outlined in Stan Tatkin’s ‘Wired for Love’ and you should, too. If you’re not able to healthily depend on someone and their support while you’re having a hard time, look elsewhere. I know codependency is the latest thing everyone’s afraid of, but experiencing someone you’ve grown very attached to just bailing because they’re counterdependent and can’t stand working on themselves while simultaneously letting you in is something I’d rather not go through again. If I have to be afraid you’ll run at the first major problem that surfaces, even if it’s a ‘you’-problem, it’s not going to work. I think that all things can and need to be talked about. If you think ignoring someone for days is a form of communication, please look elsewhere. If you think’s it’s okay to lovebomb someone and then leave after a couple of months with the minimum amount of information and no proper conversation because you’re not ready to own up to what’s happening to you emotionally, please look elsewhere.
I am looking for someone real. We all have our problems, I don't want or need a 'perfect' person. You don't have everything figured out or 'all your shit' together. Be imperfect. Admit when you feel sad and angry, lonely, hopeless or even helpless – it's all relatable. Don't hide it. Be quirky, be dorky, be witchy, be opinionated, be yourself. Don't pretend.
I'm looking for someone to share romance with. Not great gestures, but small, meaningful ones. Poems for each other, expressing our feelings; cards with heartfelt messages that we put our perfume/cologne on, and a symbol that means something to us only, the print of your lips with lipstick, the way I sign and seal my letters for you.
Just as important to me is agreeing on living a healthy life, staying in shape both for ourselves and for each other, regularly working out and eating healthy. I am drug and disease-free and expect the same of you. I do drink as I love a good beer or glass of wine, rum or whiskey, but I've never really been drinking much and especially during the past year have further reduced it. One vice I have is that I enjoy a couple of cigars a year, but I can definitely accommodate you in this regard.
Another important point is aligned life goals: many childfree people seem to be adventurous, but that is a trait I don't associate with myself at all. I value safety more than adventure. I want to build a home together with my partner, a safespace for the both of us, where we always feel loved and protected, a place that we create together, make it cozy together so we just love to get back home there wherever we might have been, a home we decorate together for Halloween (my favourite holiday) or Christmas or Springtime, as we live in tune with the seasons, seeing them change around us, enjoying nature on a walk or the rain outside, reading in our cozy home. I value stability and harmony.
Appearance-wise, I am into ladies on the smaller side (albeit not regarding height), so I'm looking for someone petite/slim/skinny/healthy-fit. Likewise, I am not really muscular and don't have visible abs; like I said, I'm a runner, so if you're more into the gym-type, I'm not a good fit.
The natural progression for me would be to move from text to voice calls, videochat and then meeting up, all of that rather sooner than later. Not that there’s a need to rush anything, but having my heart broken because I already developed feelings due to a longer timeframe and then everything unexpectedly turning to shit is not something I want to have to live through again. I’d rather see earlier if we’re compatible or not; as someone who catches feelings fast I need to protect myself, I unfortunately had to learn that
Caveats/Possible red flags

• I don't like travelling as it stresses me out; I don't mind being somewhere else for a week or two, but the organisation part of it drains my energy very quickly and dealing with stuff that doesn't work out is overwhelming to me. Smaller trips are ok, but I'm not the right person to travel the world with.
• I am not the most awake person in the morning (i.e. I identify as nightowl)
• I need space for my own projects/time to recharge after social interaction.
• While I feel like I am in tune with my inner child and working on/with it through therapy, I realise this is something that could be a turn-off for people.
• I have been diagnosed with depressive episodes in the past and am taking anti-depressants right now. I realise that I am a work in progress, maybe more so than in times past, but I manage and the fact that I'm putting myself out here is based on me being ready to get to know someone new.
• I want to create a home together here, as I'm firmly rooted where I was born; I realise this is a lot to ask, but I have seen many people here being open to moving, so I want to at least try reaching out to them.

If you're interested, feel free to message me and include some pictures of yourself and I will reply with my own. Have a nice day (:

Introduction
In the bustling metropolis of Noida, where rapid urbanization and burgeoning aspirations intersect, the quest for quality education stands as paramount. With an array of educational institutions dotting its landscape, choosing the right school for your child can be a daunting task. However, fear not, for we embark on a journey to unveil the cream of the crop among Noida’s educational institutions. Join us as we explore and rank the best schools in Noida, providing a beacon of excellence in shaping young minds.
Delhi World Public School: A Beacon of Educational Excellence
Nestled in the heart of Noida, Delhi World Public School (DWPS) emerges as a beacon of educational excellence, setting benchmarks in holistic learning and character development. With a commitment to nurturing young minds into global citizens equipped with knowledge, compassion, and integrity, DWPS stands tall among its peers.
Academic Excellence: Fostering Intellectual Growth
At DWPS, academic excellence isn’t just a goal; it's a way of life. With a rigorous curriculum designed to challenge and inspire, students are encouraged to explore their potential and strive for greatness. The school boasts of state-of-the-art facilities, experienced faculty members, and innovative teaching methodologies aimed at nurturing critical thinking, creativity, and problem-solving skills.
Holistic Development: Nurturing Minds, Bodies, and Souls
Education at DWPS transcends textbooks and classrooms, embracing the holistic development of every child. From sports and arts to community service and extracurricular activities, students are provided with a myriad of opportunities to discover their passions and talents. The school believes in nurturing well-rounded individuals who not only excel academically but also exhibit empathy, resilience, and leadership qualities.
Global Outlook: Cultivating International Perspectives
In an increasingly interconnected world, DWPS recognizes the importance of fostering global perspectives among its students. Through international collaborations, exchange programs, and multicultural experiences, students are exposed to diverse cultures, languages, and ideologies, preparing them to thrive in a globalized society. The school encourages openness, tolerance, and respect for cultural differences, shaping students into empathetic and culturally competent individuals.
Innovative Pedagogy: Embracing 21st-Century Learning
As the world evolves at a rapid pace, so does education. DWPS stays ahead of the curve by embracing innovative pedagogies and leveraging technology to enhance learning outcomes. From interactive smart classrooms to virtual labs and online learning platforms, the school harnesses the power of technology to engage students, personalize learning experiences, and foster digital literacy.
Parental Involvement: A Collaborative Approach
At DWPS, education is a collaborative endeavor involving not just students and teachers but also parents and the community at large. The school values the partnership between home and school, encouraging parents to actively participate in their child’s educational journey. Through regular communication, workshops, and parent-teacher meetings, DWPS ensures that parents are well-informed and involved in their child’s progress and development.
Conclusion: Elevating Education, Empowering Minds
In a landscape teeming with educational options, Delhi World Public School stands out as a shining beacon of excellence, embodying the ethos of holistic education and global citizenship. With a commitment to academic excellence, holistic development, global outlook, innovative pedagogy, and parental involvement, DWPS empowers young minds to soar to new heights and make a positive impact on the world. So, if you're seeking a school that not only educates but also inspires, look no further than Delhi World Public School – where education is truly elevated.

Embedded systems are at the heart of many modern technological advancements, from smart home devices to automotive systems. As an aspiring embedded systems engineer, the best way to gain practical knowledge and develop your skills is through hands-on projects. These projects not only solidify your theoretical understanding but also give you invaluable experience in problem-solving and system design. Here are some essential hands-on projects to master in your embedded course.
Embedded systems are at the heart of many modern technological advancements, from smart home devices to automotive systems. As an aspiring embedded systems engineer, the best way to gain practical knowledge and develop your skills is through hands-on projects. These projects not only solidify your theoretical understanding but also give you invaluable experience in problem-solving and system design. Here are some essential hands-on projects to master in your embedded course.

1. LED Blinking Project

Objective:

Learn the basics of microcontroller programming and GPIO (General Purpose Input/Output) operations.

Description:

Start with a simple project where you program a microcontroller to blink an LED on and off. This project introduces you to fundamental concepts such as setting up a development environment, writing and uploading code, and using timers.

Key Learnings:

• Microcontroller setup and configuration
• Basic C/C++ programming for embedded systems
• Understanding GPIO pins and their functions

2. Digital Thermometer

Objective:

Build a temperature-sensing device using a microcontroller and a temperature sensor.

Description:

Create a digital thermometer that reads temperature data from a sensor (like the DS18B20) and displays the readings on an LCD screen. This project involves interfacing sensors and displays with the microcontroller and handling data conversion.

Key Learnings:

• Interfacing sensors and displays
• Analog-to-digital conversion
• Data acquisition and processing

3. Home Automation System

Objective:

Design a basic home automation system to control appliances remotely.

Description:

Develop a system where you can control home appliances like lights and fans using a microcontroller and a communication module (e.g., Wi-Fi or Bluetooth). Implement a simple user interface to operate the system via a smartphone or computer.

Key Learnings:

• Wireless communication protocols (Wi-Fi, Bluetooth)
• Control of relays and actuators
• User interface design and implementation

4. Smart Door Lock

Objective:

Create a security system with an electronic lock controlled by a microcontroller.

Description:

Design a smart door lock system that uses a keypad or RFID reader for access control. The system should authenticate users and trigger a servo motor to unlock the door.

Key Learnings:

• Security and authentication mechanisms
• Interfacing with input devices (keypad, RFID)
• Control of servo motors and other actuators

5. Robot Car

Objective:

Build a basic robotic car with obstacle avoidance capabilities.

Description:

Construct a small robot car using a microcontroller, motors, and sensors (like ultrasonic or infrared sensors). Program the car to navigate and avoid obstacles autonomously.

Key Learnings:

• Motor control and driver circuits
• Sensor integration and data interpretation
• Algorithms for autonomous navigation

6. Weather Station

Objective:

Develop a weather monitoring system that collects and displays environmental data.

Description:

Create a weather station using various sensors (temperature, humidity, pressure) and a microcontroller. Display the collected data on an LCD or send it to a web server for remote monitoring.

Key Learnings:

• Multi-sensor integration
• Data logging and storage
• Networking and data transmission

7. Heart Rate Monitor

Objective:

Design a health monitoring device to measure and display heart rate.

Description:

Build a heart rate monitor using a pulse sensor and a microcontroller. Display the heart rate on an OLED screen or send the data to a mobile app.

Key Learnings:

• Bio-signal acquisition and processing
• Interfacing with display modules
• Mobile app integration (optional)

8. Automatic Plant Watering System

Objective:

Create a system that automatically waters plants based on soil moisture levels.

Description:

Design a plant watering system using a soil moisture sensor and a microcontroller. Program the system to activate a pump to water the plants when the soil moisture drops below a certain threshold.

Key Learnings:

• Sensor-based decision making
• Control of pumps and valves
• Power management and optimization

9. Smart Meter

Objective:

Build an energy monitoring device to track power consumption.

Description:

Develop a smart meter that measures electrical energy consumption using a current sensor and a microcontroller. Display the data on an LCD or transmit it to a central server for analysis.

Key Learnings:

• Electrical energy measurement
• Real-time data processing
• Remote data transmission

10. Voice-Controlled Assistant

Objective:

Create a voice-activated system to control various devices.

Description:

Design a voice-controlled assistant using a microcontroller, a microphone, and a speech recognition module. Program it to respond to voice commands and control devices like lights, fans, or appliances.

Key Learnings:

• Voice recognition and processing
• Audio signal interfacing
• Control system integration

Conclusion

Hands-on projects are a critical component of mastering embedded systems. They not only enhance your practical skills but also prepare you for real-world challenges. By working on these projects, you will gain a deep understanding of microcontroller programming, sensor integration, and system design, setting a strong foundation for a successful career in embedded systems engineering. Dive into these projects, and watch your skills and confidence grow!.

Chapter 1: the event
It was the fall of my intern year as I bean my off service trauma rotation. This month was ubiquitously notorious for being the most labor intrusive and least productive rotaion of our emergency medicine program. Knowing this I entered with the intention of simply surviving the month.
Another intern and I let’s call them A for sake of ambiguity, we’re the first emergency medicine residents to roste on the trauma services that year. A shaky start would be an understatement. In the words of chance the raper “like my grama with the Parkinson’s playing operation.” Would better describe it. Medically we did well. We were very competent and completed our work daily, but communication and coordination was non existent. Our Cheifs had informed us that Tuesday was our day of and the Trauma cheif residents had minimum communication with us, or our Cheifs as it seams when A and I did not report on Tuesday they sternly made their dissatisfaction known.
I have struggled with insomnia sense the age of 10. Had 2 sleep studies by this point in my life and been prescribed nearly every sleeping aid on the market. The 80-94 hr work weeks of our trauma rotaion only worsened my insomnia. My lack of sleep likely contributed to a less than prime adaptive immune system and 2 days out of my trauma rotaion I contracted strep like symptoms with associated nausea, requiring me to call for a sick day the next day. No the first day that I felt too ill to work. I was not fully aware of the reporting process. I reported to my Chiefs, but I did not believe I could come to work tomorrow with amble time and notice, however I was somewhat delayed in letting their Cheifs know, because the surgical chiefs rotated every few days and I did not know who my was going to be the next day. The second day which I had to call out sick I was able to locate the cheif for the next day and reprot according to our university’s protocol, which requires that if a resident feels they are not fit for work they must not come in and the university must have staff coverage without any fear or implementation of punitive actions.
I had finally survived to the last week of my trauma rotaion and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. What I could not see was the pile of stress, shitty diet, lack of mental well ness and sleep deprivation which I was pushing down to reach the light. By this time I had seen a psychiatrist regularly for sleep medication. I had mentioned to him that I had been experiencing more stressed lately and feel that I might be depressed. he reassured me that it was likely only due to my circumstances, given the difficulty of the trauma rotation and wish to reassess once the rotation was over. Looking back I had to fill the habit of drinking more than I usually do. My only on nights before I have days off became 1-2 beers every other night. All of this repressed unhealthy shit finally pushed bad on September 23rd. That night I was at work even later than usual, I stayed up later than usual and couldn’t seem to fall asleep. With the stress of only having minimal sleep and knowing I only had 2 more days of trauma left, I took an extra dose of my sleeping medication.
I opened my eyes to the fighting sight of sun beaming in my window and I instantly knew I was late. (Sense I hadn’t seen the sun in a month) . Due to my need for scrupulous sleep hygiene I have been sleeping with my phone of and away for me. I rushed to grab it and watched as the little Apple logo seamed to glow on the screen for an eternity. Then in conjunction with its fading I saw 3 missed calls from my director, a text from college A and 2 missed calls from the surgical director. Still, I was able to calm myself, knowing that resident A had been late to this rotation by a few hours 2 other days and nothing came of it. I called my director back and he asked me to report to his office where I was greeted by my director, my coordinator and another emergency medicine facility.
With the only explanation of: “we just want you to get better”, I was handed a letter, to my relief it did not entail my termination, but a declaration of administrative leave and a requirement to undergo an evaluation at a well known university in Florida.
Lake any other savvy millennial, I did my research. By research I mean numerous google searches and screeches thru the depts of redit. To my dismay I discovered that in order for a residency program to fire you, they must first initiate an administrative suspension. I would soon find out however, being terminated would have been a delightful outcome compared to what ensued.
I spend the next few weeks in the wallos of regret and depression. I indulged in higher qualities of alchohol then I ever have before. I all but ceased communing with peers, and abruptly stoped any physical activity I had once enjoyed. Frightened as I was I was ensured, it will be ok “we just want you to get better”
Chapter 2 The evaluation : guilty until proven innocent I did exactly as instructed and scheduled an evaluation, I supposed that this was either a mental evaluation to assess if I’m fit for work with plans of termination or it actually was an evaluation to better treat my insomnia. To this day I regret my ignorance, and wish I had researched the process more. The Hindi / sand-skrt idea of Hamsa 🪬 is that in order to do any good you must have full knowledge or else good intentions can result in harm. I truely believe my director had good intentions, however but him and I did not have full knowledge of the nature of this evaluation.
Looking back see how easily I could have avoided my troubles by asserting legal aid at this point or even by researching this evaluation process more in depth. If one searches impaired practitioner program which I now know this evaluator works for, the search entire will populate 5 or 6 layferms along side their home website and there is a valid reason for this.
If one every finds themself in this process I employ you to bring a DSM to your evaluation or at least be familiar with the most common use disorders in the DSM-5, because your evaluation will turn into a dance of questions where the evaluator attempts to trap you in a round about way to stating something that may qualify for one of the diagnosis. I have provided an image from the DSM-5 below outlining AUD, which the evaluator concluded that I had the most severe from:
Image
Example***** Here are 10 examples of how he fraudulently assessed me taken directly from his assessment note.

1. Evaluator: Have you ever stoped drinking in the last year.

Me: yes I stoped every week day, I was only drinking on the weekends, until two weeks ago.
-Evaluator uses stoping and starting every week to qualify for 2 or more unsuccessful attempts to stop in the last year “There is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control alcohol use.”

1. Evaluator Have you ever had withdrawal symptoms

Me no
Evaluator Well Have you ever had a hangover? You know that’s a from of acute withdrawal
Me: yes in college, I had a few but that was years ago and I’m pretty sure the pathophysiology is different.
Evaluator uses this to count for withdrawal symptoms even tho is was more than a year ago

1. Evaluator: Have you even taken your sleeping medication on a day or night which you drank? Me: Yes, I took my prescriptions are prescribed but I never drank close to bed

Evaluator: qualified this as dangerous behavior with alcohol (where the DSM gives examples such as unprotected sex and drunk driving). The sleeping medication I was on is not a benzodiazepine therefore it is not deadly with alcohol. I personally have seen many patients in the ED who have taken their entire bottle of the medication and drank copious amounts, we just monitor them over night and rehydrate them

1. Evaluator Has anyone told you you drink to much or been worried about you Me: No I drink much less than my friends

Evaluator what about your girlfriend? Me: well she actually doesn’t drink at all she doesn’t like it. She often buys me beer for The Weeknd’s tho. One time we went to a movie and she got a little irritated because I waited for beer then complained about them not having any craft beer. So she said, “you couldn’t have just said no” and drank something else. However, she apologized after and said it’s worth waiting if it’s my only day off.
Evaluator said this qualifies for continued drinking despite causing significant relation consequences, ie divorce.

1. Evaluator : you have sleep issues I hear, and your chart says you’ve had depression in the past, don’t you know that alcohol can effect your sleep and mood Me: yes that’s why I never drink within 3 hours of sleep.

Evaluator but you knew this and still drank
Evaluator: qualifies for drinking despite unwanted physical or psychological effects (this should be recurring to effects the alcohol is causing, I have had insomnia sense the age of 10 long before I took my first sip)
7 evaluator you were late for work and told my you had a drink the day before
Me: Yes but I was late because I didn’t sleep and took double my sleeping meds, I will never do that again
Qualifies for 2 significant work or school issues in the past year ( a therapist and other psychologist ensured me that being late on or a few days doesn’t count they typically are getting fired or failing) ( moreover, this would assume I was late do to drinking it’s self and also assume if happened more than once)

1. • Alcohol is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended

He never once asked anything related to this question yet said I qualified in his final report 9. A great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain alcohol, use alcohol, or recover from its effects. The evaluators logic here was sense I was late for work and I had 2 beers the day before I must be taking long to recover from it (this is assuming I missed due to alcohol)

1. Tolerance drinking more to require the same effect: this he checked as true in his final note however it was never even discussed in our evaluation. I did mention to him that I’ve been drinking more than I had earlier in the year frequency wise, but they said nothing to do with quantity or needing more.
   
2. Wanting to drink so bad you can not think of anything else: this is the only qualification of SAUD my evaluator said I did not have.
   

Moreover, without legal help I was not aware that I could obtain a second evaluation or even oppose going to get evaluated at all, but that wouldn’t have mattered seeing I still thought this was for my health and wellbeing as seen when I was asked why do you think you are here to today, to which I replayed “so that I can be evaluated to see what is needed to get back to work”.
To maks the ordeal more infuriating the evaluator continues to ingratiate himself and lie through the process telling you, “it will be fine as long as you are 100% honest”, “anything you say in here is between you and me” or “you slipped up once with your meds, I know your residnecy program they will probably just want a few more out patient tests”
Two weeks later I received a phone call right before I left for an out of state vacation to visit my nice for her birthday. During the call I was informed that I would be required to complete a partial hospitalization program (PHP) lasting “6-10 weeks” which would coast from 15-50 grand not including doctor visits or housing which is billed separately. I suppressed this inconvenience, enjoyed my vocation and reported when I returned, knowing that I must complete this soon so I may return to work with due to the fact that my payed time off would soon be diminished. At this time I had not yet heard of the organization PRN.
Chapter 3 Guilty till proven innocent: The diagnosis
Shell shocked I arrived to a in patient psychiatric unit and was rapidly cleared to progress to treatment without detoxification. During my 90 day of forced rehabilitation I met a few other individuals who were unjustly and fraudulently forced into treatment. I began to look up to one of these such members of the men’s community, who I will refer to as patient X for ambiguity sake.
Unlike me patient X did have alcohol use disorder. He spent many clinic days drinking to avoid alcoholic withdraws. The curious component of his story is that he admitted his depravity, saught help and through his own journey became sober. The bodies at be, namely his local physician, Health monitoring program, rejected his personal path to sobriety and forced him to undergo 90 days of in patient treatment before he could practice medicine again. When he checked in to rehab he had been sober for over a year.
Ask for Stories of people from online
As for me I spend many sleepless nights pondering how consuming a legal substance in a moderate amount could throw me into significant legal financial issues. My labs my toxicology, my story and my collateral from colleagues from colleagues all indicated light to moderate alcohol use but my evaluators word stood as the word of God.
More frightening was the director of this rehabs acknowledgment of this. The director who happens to also coincidentally be the evaluator, stated to me as well as to staff on multiple occasions: “ I suggest inpatient treatment for everyone who is reported”. “This is safer for me not to miss anyone who could harm patients, and I figure there must be a reason someone reported them.”
I am still elucidating the reason why I was determined guilty and proven innocent, however I can say from my 90 day stent that the majority of the patients at this rehab needed to be there. This program is saving lives of both providers and patients, however it is destroying the lives of those wrongfully accused.
Chapter 4 your lisense rehab or jail : Upon arivil I was sent to a detox hospital underwent a medical examination and was “one of the lucky ones” who required no detoxification and could report directly to PHP. Like everyone else, I spent 90 days in a PHP, being as 6-10 weeks is simply a lie they tell patients to decrease the change of resisting the treatment. When discussing the topic one therapist sated “if we told patients 90 days they would never come.” She then attempted to justify the treatment by outlining the story of a patient she had called who “didn’t make it to treatment” and killed themselves”. It is my belief that it is not the lack of PHP which impelled such professionals to take their life, but them realizing that they now will be obliged to undergo 90 days of PHP, 5 years of PRN monitoring with a loss of autonomy and hundreds of thousands of dollars taken from them that induced their hopelessness. For even if these professionals were truly mentally unstable in their addictions, in every case it was only following a phone call where they were informed they must undergo treatment that they took their life’s. By this time I still haven’t the slightest clue what PRN was.
Despite the security these programs provide for many my 6 main issues with them can be summarized in : 1. Kick backs: evaluators are directors of treatment clinics 2. The reported are guilty till proven innocent 3. The price, the overflow of money these places drag in from both patients and state universities is appalling, they charge separately for every visit and test 4. Although they make the claim that they are individualized, they are anything but. Every patient gets the same stay and treatment from the doctor drunk on the job and the one who was late to a shift 5. They force voluntary treatment. remember that friendly evaluator who promised he had your best interest at heart, so you opened up and told him everything about your substance use/ developmental / family history, well if you don’t stay for 90 days he will be “normally obliged” to tip the board of medical off to you.

1. The programs have overstepped their intended jurisdiction. -these programs work well if they function how they were intended at their inception. Cite original purpose. Originally these programs were designed to protect physicians and civilians from impaired practitioners; being healthcare workers who were impaired at work. Over the years, these organizations have extended their authority to encompass individuals with substance use disorders When not at work and also those who are in training to become healthcare professionals. Take for example myself compared to a physician who is impaired at work. A doctor who arrived for duty under the influence would surely benifit from the extensive testing, therapy and accountability enforced via these programs. In accordance the 20,000$ per year cost is appropriate when only making up roughly 7% of their yearly salary vs nearly half of a residents. In my case with my loss of income from employment, coast of treatment and monitoring, this year I will be required to pay 20,000$ to work. Yes, I will be losing money to work. Even if did indeed have a substance use disorder this level of monitoring wouldn’t not be considered appropriate.

Dispite all of the miscomings of this System My time spend in PHP was indeed helpful, as I believe it would be for anyone. Time for exercise, a reprieve from work and weekly counseling. A sample structure of my day to day schedule is provided below for insight:
Structure The general structure of these rehabitation centers is as follows: 1. One week of orientation phase, where you are not allowed in electronics or contact with the outside world world. Therefore, if you’re going, bring some things you would like to read or study. 2. In phase 2, you can use your phone however you cannot leave campus. You must stay in the dorm on campus. These shitty 1 room run down apartments with two other roommates will cost you about $1000 a week, they are required for at least four weeks and they are billed separately, no insurance will help you out here. 3. In phase 3 you can commute to campus if you beg your therapist and live very close. Whether you’re on campus or living off-campus, you are allowed to leave up to four hours per day. If you commute, you’ll be required to take a sober link decide you must Breath, alcohol test into every 6 hours. Like everything else in this program you must pay for this separately, a few hundred dollars a week. You advanced to other phases by completing assignments, however, assignments are limited by required built-in time, intrusive, scheduling, and reviewing. Therefore, if you do everything as rapidly as possible phase 1 will take one week phase 2 will take three weeks.
Every day schedule:
7:30: wake up, report to the front desk to inform them that you haven’t ran away yet and take and prescribed medications. They keep all your medications and require that you report to take them; for me this was antidepressants in an attempt to dispel the depression I contracted from being forced into treatment and whatever off label medication they were attempting to treat my ADHD with, since control medications were forbidden.
8 am: community group assessments This consisted of other patients presenting their assignments amongst the large group, on the weekends this was often an hour later and 12 study regularly took the place of assignment presentation.
10 am: process group. This was a two hour group therapy session with 6 to 12 other professionals in a therapist and training or occasionally a licensed mental health therapist.
1 pm: recreation This was generally about an hour of some sober themed craft or activity. Once a week this time slot was used for yoga.
2 pm: this was another time slot used for patients to present assignments as well as for individual therapy sessions. Each patient had one individual therapy session lasting 30 minutes per week.
3pm: This was time allotted to work on assignments or go to the gym on your sex specific scheduled gym day.
5pm: this time was used for guest speakers or another 12 step study group.
6 pm : this was generally an off-campus 12 step group
10 pm: report to the front desk and let them know you still haven’t ran away and take and Medication which are prescribed to take at night, then return to your cot bed in your room with 1-2 other roommates.
I found the community to be one of the most beneficial aspects of the PHP program. I was in a cohort of chill ass professionals of the same occupation who were always there to help each other.
Assignments The curriculum of the PHP consisted of assignment based on every step of the 12th step program. Generally, a patient would be required to complete an assignment on their own, review it with other patients, then faculty and finally present the assignment in front of the whole treatment group. You’re only given one assignment at a time and there are multiple steps to each which all requires scheduling this ensures that no matter how determined a patient is a full 90 days of treatment is required to complete all the assignments.
AA structure -the obsolete nature of AA has been verified in numbers studies, but I will refrain from divulging here and lend that endeavor to Dr. Lance Dodes very thorough discussion on the subject,in “the sober truth “
In all sincerity, if I truely did have a severe use disorder this experience could have been life saving. I only wish I could have used my 50 grand for someone who has spent their life time In addictive without reprieve. My first conversation when I was given my phone back was how I wish my father could be able to attend this PHP.
Chapter 5 reporting and PRN Self reporting What they ask you What you should tell them
There’s a third-party agency called professional resource network. Every state has their own. This agency works as a liaison between you and whatever credentialing service your occupation requires. Essentially they ensure your monitoring after treatment. Stake governments and licensing boards trust them, mainly because they monitor with the highest level of intrusiveness. This alleviates much work for state governments and licensing boards because once an individual is being monitored by a professional resource network, then they are deemed appropriate for duty and no further investigation/litigation needs to occur, as long as the monitored individual completely complies.
Because I was never impaired at work I was never reported to this agency. The general workflow of things someone would report you to professional resource network, then the resource network would contact you, and then you would be required to report for an evaluation at a treatment center, which would inevitably result in a suggestion I’ve treatment at that given treatment center. In my case I was sent to the treatment center without PRN being involved. Thus, two weeks into treatment. I was notified by my therapist that I needed to call PRN and self report. I attempted to resistance given that I did not have a problem and was not individually seeking help. I asked what happened if I didn’t self report. I was told that in order to stay in the treatment program I had to report to PRN. This meant either I report to PRN or I get kicked out of the treatment program and lose my job.
When you report to PRN they will ask you why you are in treatment. They will then list off every substance imaginable, asking you if you have ever tried the substance and when your last use was. Ultimately, they will obtain your discharge information from your treatment center, so it is in your best interest to report only what was found in your biochemical testing. If it wasn’t in your hair, I would argue that you don’t have a use disorder regarding that substance and it’s not relevant. I don’t believe it’s important for them to know that you smoked weed when you were 12.
Chapter 6 The contract:
Before being discharged from a treatment facility, a professional resource network will have you sign a contract. A little known fact which I was oblivious to is that contracts can be negotiated. Though this isn’t it possible, it is highly improbable that you can negotiate your contract since PRN has a power to delay your clearance to return to work.
Contractor almost never personalized, and I have not heard of a contract which is not a five-year agreement. You will sign releases of information so that PRN has access to all of your information which was gathered at the treatment facility. You must have a therapist, psychiatrist, primary care, doctor, and a addiction, medicine psychiatrist. You assign releases of information for all of them. You will be required To commit to: 1. three mutual aid meetings a week which you must log. I log smart recovery meetings. 2. Weekly therapy sessions with an approved mental health therapist from their list 3. Monthly doctors appointments with an addiction medicine psychiatrist 4. Yearly appointments with a primary care physician 5. Monthly appointments with a psychiatrist 6. Daily check-ins on a random drug testing app ( you will agree to weekly urine tests, a peth test 4 times a year, a hair test twice a year and a little caveat that says anything else they deem, clinically reasonable) 7. Quarterly update reports which you are required to obtain from a workplace monitor, therapist, addiction, medicine, psychiatrist, primary care physician and any other doctor you are seeing. 8. You must upload all of your prescriptions into a mobile application every single time you get them refilled and are not allowed to take them until they are approved. 9. Attendance of a PRN group via zoom. This is a local group you are assigned along with other monitored practitioners. There is a fee of roughly 130$ a month to attend this required group. For me all of these requirements coast around 20,000 a year. If you ever have a positive test even if it is the result of contamination from rubbing alcohol or unintentional ingestion of alcohol/ allergy medication your contract will rest to 5 years from the time of positive test. Once your five year contract is completed, you must ask to be released from monitoring. At that point they will search for any reason to keep you under monitoring. This could be dilute urines, daily check ins or a week where you did not attend mutual aid meetings. Every certification and license which you apply for will likely ask you if you were under a monitoring program/ have been treated for substance use. You must give an explanation and check yes. As far as licensing programs are concerned, if you were under the monitoring of PRN, you are safe, however they group practitioners who have had behavioral issues with practitioners who were diverting drugs from work. Therefore, keep in mind that you will be labeled as a sever addict.
7 Back to work and only work. During treatment your only goal is to return to work, however when you return your experience will be drastically distinct from what you remember. For me, I was now working in isolation. Missing six months of my training meant that no other Resident was on the same rotation as me. My coworkers at all formed friend groups. When I returned I was greeted with much concern for my well being. No one would speak to be about my absence, however everyone knew there is only one reason a resident would leave for 6 months then return. My Accdeemic meetings were consisting of attending telling me “I have a target on my back now” and “ I have to preform even better than others” in the light of my time missed. If this wasn’t alienating enough, the majority of Resident events, sponsored by recruiters and my university revolved around alcohol to which I had to give some excuse to why I can not partake with others. I’m fortunate that I do not have an addiction, because these stressful conditions along with the daunting amount of dead and requirements imposed by PRN are enough to make any addict relapse. While I was at treatment, I was in the dative with Samyr stories a physicians whose addictions got the best of them. Physicians who did not make it to treatment, often taking their own life. These stories were presented as a warning. Your addictions will kill you without our treatment was the message. When, in reality I did not hear one story in which the addiction killed physician. Every physician who didn’t make it to treatment took their life after being told they must report to a treatment facility. Perhaps they knew what this entailed and it was not their addiction or getting caught which caused them to end their lives, but the unmanageable and often unreasonable burden that treatment would put on their lives.
9 How to escape So your fucked your in PRN and should be or you should and now your recovered and want to terminated your contract.

1. You ask to be released early done at 1/2 time ( good luck)
2. You have “good reason” (no one has ever been let out of contract because of this reason, the verbiage is far too vague)
3. You serve all your time and they let you out(maybe, as discussed earlier, they would do everything they can to keep you in your contract as long as your practicing)
4. You can’t practice medicine anymore

10 Layer up butter cup : I cannot emphasize the extent to which legal help is required in this process. You much seek it and seek it early. Lawyers can provide many avenues to you early in the process. Once you have committed to treatment, gone for evaluation or are in a PRN contract , this is very little that you or legal help can do. Spend a few thousand dollars when you are accused and save the 20-30,000 later.
After you have been evaluated if you disagree as I did, then this is the process you must undergo. 1. Hire a occupation, defense, lawyer 2. Prove you don’t have an addiction, this is done by having an alternative evaluator with similar credentials state that either you don’t have an addiction or that PRN’s level of monitoring is not medically appropriate ( this will need to be a multi day neuropsychological evaluation, which will cost about $5000). 3. Your lawyer must draft in writing that the medical level of monitoring is not required such as another medical professional and send this to PRN 4. PRN will tattle on you to the board of medicine. 5. The board of medicine will conduct an investigation. 6. At the end or when they believe they have enough reasonable evidence to the board of medicine will suspend your license or claim, you must comply with the PRN contract to practice. 7. At this time your lawyer will defend you in the state court against the board. This is costly but much less than the coast of a 5 year PRN contract 8. If you win you will likely suggest an alternative level of care such as gonna get therapy every week. If you lose, than you wasted a fuck ton of money and are still bound by your PRN contract.
Overall this entire process has coast me Over all coast:
My finances for this year only including PRN and rent are as follows:
120-200$ every week for testing 480-800/ month
65 every week for therapy 195/month
125 every month for PRN group
About 50-69 every month for 2 doctor apts
So at least 745$/month at the lowest
Treatment at the recovery center coast 20,000 for me out of pocket and
I wasn’t payed for 6 months with no FMLA because I am a first year. At the 1 year mark I will have made 26,000 this year after taxes And payed About 29,000 on PRN alone
Rent is 1,000 so that’s 12,000 a year
Just in rent and PRN alone I will be at 26,000- 41,600 -15,600.
I will be in debt by at least 18,000 at the 1 year mark
Coast of treatment center 20,000 (with insurance) For each year of PRN roughly 20,000 Add that to 6 months of attending salary which was delayed due to my treatment time: at least 150,000 Layer coasts along with other evaluations 25,000 Missing 6 months of residency pay 30,000 Coast of 1 year in monitoring: 245,000 Coast of 5 years 325,000
If my case progress to a trail I will require an extra 20,000 in court coasts
Chapter 11 My secondary eval: Dr sushi After I arrived at my treatment center I challenge my evaluation multiple times. Each and every time I was discharged and often accused of alternate mental health/ substance abuse issues to discourage my advances. I was never given the opportunity to undergo alternative assessment, however PRN guidelines state that you can obtain a second option within 7 days of your first. This is a mute point, however, because you will not receive the results of your evaluation until over a week after it is conducted and the second evaluation must be conducted by another PRN hired evaluator of their choosing. During my stay in rehab I contacted PRN multiple times to attempt another evaluation/ legal help. They warned against both stating they were a “waste of money” and “pointless”.
After completing my treatment with the guidance of many addiction, experienced physicians, mental health counselors and psychiatrists recommendations I sought in a secondary evaluation. I chose a highly qualified professional with over 30 years of experience to conduct an extensive neuo psycho social evaluation of me. One that I was sure would be more extensive than the evaluation I received at treatment and more importantly an unbiased evaluation.
The results from my evaluation not only showed that I did not have a substance abuse problem warranting PRN level monitoring, but also that PRN was falling to allow adequate treatment of other conditions such as my ADHD. My evaluation showed my ADHD was not only untreated by PRNs attempt at using non controlled medication, but also in the top 3% most severe presentations of ADHD. My evaluator went on to explain my results by questioning why my treatment center even mandated I undergo neuro cognitive evaluation. The only neurodiverse findings were my IQ, my dyslexia and my ADHD. However, a neuo cognitive examination can be billed separately by treatment centers, therefore they always recommend one.
Chapter 12 Amongst its greed, intrusive nature and faulty accusations, professional recourse network function highly proficiently at the task they were designed to; protective physicians and patients from physicians who are impaired at work. In this domain they save lives, offer second changes and protect the public. When they act beyond their intended jurisdiction by imposing unnecessary monetary demands on practitionersin training, accuse practitioners without proof or act on behavior exemplified outside of a work setting they unjustly and inappropriately attack the week and innocent.
Proposed reform: As a trainee my universities malpractice insurance covers me for mistakes made at work. If a learner mistakenly harms a patient, then the university stands on their behalf. If the learner does something wrong under a teachers direct guidance, then the teacher is at fault. This makes sense logically as well as pragmatically. The state entrusts large amounts of money to hospital systems and universities to train resident physicians. A portion of this money is allocated to malpractice insurance. This should extend to accused impairment.
Suppose a training university was required to cover rehabilitation and monitoring of a resident of whom they claim is impaired. Alternatively they have the option of firing the trainee. This would reduce the number of innocent trainees being accused of impairment, make the process of rehabilitation more fair and provide a better use for tax payer derived dollars, which hospital systems are given to train residents. The truly impaired could still seek help, less false accusations would be made and with the employers having the ability to fire at the moment of impairment, there would be less chance of impairment at work.

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