How do i find myspace unblockers

Open Directories

2009.07.01 05:26 _ze Open Directories

Images of indexes or directories. They can be open or not. We also accept links to unprotected directories of pics, vids, music, software and otherwise interesting files.

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2010.02.19 17:00 sketchampm Rabbits: the intelligent, loving, and often misunderstood pet

/rabbits is an open community where users can learn, share cute pictures, or ask questions about rabbits. Please note we are a *pet rabbit* community that discourages breeding and encourages rescue.

[link]

2011.01.01 18:54 52 Book Challenge

A subreddit for the participants of the 52 Book Challenge (one book per week for a year) to discuss their progress and discoveries.

[link]

2024.05.21 08:44 EntrepreneurDizzy640 My girlfriend 22F broke up with me 22M and she and I still see each other. What should I do?

Me 22M and my girlfriend or ex girlfriend 22F we together for 6 months but have been broken up for a month now, but she and I still see each other no matter how many times I try to ignore her. The reason she broke up with me was because she doesn’t believe that I never had a romantic interest or had a relationship with my girl family friend. My family friend and I had photos in my phone of our memories hanging out, nothing weird. I have been asked by her multiple times if I did like her, and I keep saying no. I’ve told her everything about my relationship with my family friend, but she said something like all she needed was honesty and transparency and that I’m not giving that to her. I then showed her my phone and she looked through the past messages I’ve had with a friend of mine who happens to be involved with the situation and my girlfriend then sees a message of my friend asking if I liked my family friend and me saying that I really do like her, but not in a romantic way. I guess that’s what validated her assumption about the situation about me and my family friend. She then said that she’s been lied to by a lot of guys and knows when someone is lying to her, that is when she broke things off with me.
A week or so goes by and she then checks up on me, then later on would start seeing each other again, with no labels. Then whenever I would talk about getting back together and wanting to work things out, she still thinks that I’m a liar and won’t work things out which caused us to take some space from each other again, and then the same thing happens. This time the issue was about the girls on my instagram following. She made me show her my following and then tells me to unblock the girls that I’ve talked to before, which I have ever since I got in to the relationship with her. She then met someone i knew back in high school that I used to talk to, with no relationship interest, then the next day she asks me if I still talk to any of the girls I used to like or talked to and I said no. She then showed me a screenshot of a comment I had on my high school friend’s post from 4 years ago and she thinks I used to talk to her. I then asked her if my friend ever told her that I liked her or pursued her, she said nothing and wanted to end the call because she was upset about it. I kept my distance from her because I said take her time and talk to me whenever she’s ready. She would then reach out to me to see me but never in the talks of working things out, only to just spend time and hangout. Another issue happens again which caused me to take some time from her because I felt like it was becoming a cycle, and also made me want to stop fighting for the relationship to get back to normal, she said that we can’t get back what we had. As much as want to keep fighting for the relationship, I just felt like I wasn’t being heard and felt like every question she asks me, she wants to hear something right, right that validated her assumptions.
I tried to keep my distance from her by spending more time with my friends because I was really hurt from the situation when she broke up with me and felt like I was in an emotional roller coaster. I know everybody makes mistakes but to her, everything I do seems to be bad… But then few days later she would check up on me again, then spend time with each other, cuddling and everything, like everything was ok. But now I just feel like it’s gonna be the same thing again and I don’t know what to do about it.
She’s been cheated on in the past and have told me before that she had some jealousy from her past relationship and also told me that she was a pretty controlling. I didn’t mind it before because I feel like she might have changed now. But now I feel like everything she has done with her ex has now been projected to me. Earlier times in our relationship, whenever she and I had those issues and would take time apart, she would apologize to me few days after saying that she’s sorry for treating me bad and felt that she should’ve not projected things to me from her past that I had no relations to. And I also find it unfair on why she was focused on my past and not the present, when she was the only person in my life, my only priority.
I tried to have a serious talk about getting back but she said that she’s scared that I might eventually hurt her. Why would she be worried of the worst outcome about what could happen when she and I could be focusing on what we want to happen?
I love this girl and all, but I just don’t know what to do about this. I feel like I’m stuck on a relationship that’s not a relationship. I’ve been looking up a lot these attachment styles and many months ago, she took a quiz and says that she was a fearful avoidant, and I’ve been looking up what a person with narcissist tendencies does, but I don’t want to assume the worst about it because I’m just simply trying to understand where she is at with this type of relationship she and I has. I just really don’t know what to do now at this point and I could use some help because I’ve been sad and angry about the situation I’m in. Thank you for reading this.
What do you think I could do with this situation? What could be the cause of this happening to her and me? Should I let her go?

submitted by EntrepreneurDizzy640 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2024.05.21 07:05 Relevant-Heart-8826 Obsessed with a man who is taken

This will be very long get ready.
I am f(21) and during the pandemic I developed this habit of going on Omegle to chat with random strangers. I did this since 2020 up until Omegle shut down. I would put tags related to being a bigger woman, such as bbw, chubby, etc. however one night I decided to just go on with no tags. So in one of the many nights in which I would drink a lot and get stupid drunk and go on Omegle and get purposefully taken advantage of sexually by strange men, I met this one guy who since then I have been utterly OBSESSED with. And I need help forgetting him. He’s this really tall Arab man who is Egyptian. Our first interaction on Omegle was pretty blurry for me and don’t remember much because I was drunk. But I do remember him asking to see my breasts and I did and he came. After that I didn’t really think about him until the next day I get a call from an unknown number. And it was HIM! apparently I gave him my number that night. Then we FaceTimed later that night and I noticed he was calling obviously cuz he was in a very horny mood. Now because i was sober this time, I didn’t really have the confidence so when it came really sexual I hung up and blocked him. I think maybe 2 days later he texted me through his work number. And for some reason this is what had me hooked. Usually when I block people they get the hint. But even though it was so minimal what he did it still felt like to me he went out of his way. And I did find him attractive. He told me to tell him straight up that if I wasn’t interested that he will leave me alone for good. And tbh I became interested so I engaged more with. We became I guess friends with benefits but strictly online cuz he lives 6 hours away from me. We started talking every night then one night he casually mentioned he is ENGAGED. Because I didn’t want to make it seem like a crazy obsessed girl which I am I made it seem like oh okay cool. However I felt guilty, and I felt jealous at the same time. But I had a reality check and this is why I am writing this for advice. It’s gonna be a year in june of me and him talking. At first we used to talk every night. Now he only calls me when he needs to rant about his fiancée or his family back home. It’s like once a week now. And the worst part is that he consumes my thoughts. And I know he doesn’t care about me like that not Even in the slightest. I even gave him 100 bucks when he was on vacation in Egypt because he was running low on money which he never paid back. That was in November we are now in May. He also told me he was going to give me a gift from Egypt never did. Yes I am very stupid for wanting a man that is toxic, a cheater. But I got so use to him and he got so used to me being there every time. I’ve tried blocking him but every time I unblock him cuz I literally have his number memorize. Also, if you couldn’t tell, he’s a narcissist. When I first met him online I was still a virgin then when I lost my virginity I told him about it, and it was a big mistake. He called me all the horrible names and said I wasn’t pure and I was disgusting and that should have lost it to him. Btw he’s 29 years old so there’s a small bit of an age gap but I like older men hence the daddy issues.
How do I stop thinking about him? How do I stop anticipating his calls? How do I stop letting him from dictating my happiness? When he ignores me for a week or 2 weeks or even the whole two months he was in Egypt I begin to be super sad, or irritable. It’s affecting my life. I wish I never met him, how am I so obsess with a guy I have never touched. The only way I can think about solving this issue is by obsessing over someone else preferably someone from the same state.
Please no judgment. Just advice.

submitted by Relevant-Heart-8826 to ToxicRelationships [link] [comments]

2024.05.21 07:01 Relevant-Heart-8826 Obsessed with a narcissistic married man

submitted by Relevant-Heart-8826 to offmychest [link] [comments]

2024.05.21 07:00 Relevant-Heart-8826 I am obsessed with a married man that I never even met in real life.

submitted by Relevant-Heart-8826 to offmychest [link] [comments]

2024.05.21 06:44 GlitterEcho 39 [F4M] Australia/Online - Ultimately I just want someone to cook and bake bread for

Don't let the distance deter you, my r4r game is strong!
If you're of a particular age, you will remember the days of MySpace and before, when long lists of 100 questions would circulate with stuff like "Last thing you ate", "Vanilla or chocolate", and "Favourite sound". I am one of the weirdos who LOVED those. Rather than rushing through it, I pondered each question and gave a full and comprehensive response. Those are what seem to have triggered a love for getting to know people, and also sharing with others. I love insights into people's personalities, be it trivial things or the more meaningful.
So, if you'd like to connect, let's start with a little modern reinvention of that game.

If your personality could be felt through a song, what song would it be?
Favourite place to eat in your city? Send me a link to the menu, and/or tell me what you always order.
What is the most important quality that you want to share with someone?

I'm hoping to find
I'd love to meet people around my age (+/- 5 years or so) who enjoy conversation and have significant capacity for it. Preferably single with no kids as that's my life circumstance too which means we will have similar things to talk about. I'm happy to share photos. Humour means a lot to me, and I have a very irreverent and inappropriate sense of humour (Cards Against Humanity style). I am not a particularly sensitive person so am at ease discussing all sorts of topics.
I want to make genuine friends with the means and capability to travel so hopefully one day in the future we can host each other. Reddit chat or message me, but I can also do other platforms if we get along. Be prepared to be open and transparent about where you live and where you're from. If we don't truly click, the conversation will die, and that's okay.
Some tidbits about me

You can tell from my profile that I love to cook. You'll be getting lots of food/bread photos, so prepare yourself. I'd love to meet someone who wants to talk cooking.
I am highly engaged by deep conversation, particularly around our understanding of ourselves, how we relate to others, and sociocultural topics.
I love travel and road trips. I've been to the US many times and have many places on the bucket list, but I love travelling around Australia.
Not religious or political, and I don't smoke or do drugs or associate with people who do.
More savage than woke. I am a highly values driven person (respect, loyalty, kindness, courage).
I lift weights, though it's not an identity. I'm generally into strength and the benefits of weight training.
Other interests include art/craft, whisky (I drink and collect), music, movies, culture, communication and psychology, and animals (as in, I really like zoos and pets).
Just to give you an idea of my lifestyle, I am a professional with a great job, I live with my two dogs in my house in Adelaide, I wake up and go to bed late, I start every day with coffee, I take care of my wellbeing as a priority, I have an abundance of close friends, but I am confident going to events by myself and do so often.
I am a weird mix of both incredibly serious and incredibly silly - if you are too, you'll know what I mean by that. Sometimes I feel so happy with my life, I could burst. I genuinely never experience boredom. I smile and laugh a lot.

I'm not here to burden you with mental health issues, lies, a need for attention and validation, or anything else of the sort, and I am not interested in yours. Just real conversation, real friendship, real connection.
If you read to the end, you must be one of the serious ones, so here is a pic.

submitted by GlitterEcho to R4R30Plus [link] [comments]

2024.05.21 03:30 relationshipguy254 Should You Unblock Them to Tell Them Not to Call You?

Today I would like to answer this question: should you unblock them to tell them not to call you?
This is a pretty common situation when dealing with someone manipulative. Picture this: you're trying to keep your distance and move on. You've even blocked their number, but they still find ways to contact you, maybe through an anonymous number. However, if you're pretty keen, you've been recognizing it's them every time. They may keep calling until it becomes downright annoying. So you might consider unblocking them to set things straight, to tell them to stop calling. But is that wise? Should you unblock them just to deliver that message?
Actually, that's the last thing you should do. It's unproductive and counterproductive to block someone just to unblock them later. It's best to maintain the block because unblocking them still leaves the door open for communication. There are several reasons why unblocking them isn't a good idea.
Firstly, there's the potential for manipulation. Abusive individuals excel at pressing people's buttons, and reopening communication with them can put you at risk of being manipulated again. That's how they gained control over you initially. They're incredibly persuasive and skilled at using various tactics, even ones you least expect, like involving your children or family, to manipulate you and regain control. So, simply informing them that you're blocking them again reopens that communication, making you vulnerable to manipulation, especially if you haven't fully understood yourself or your boundaries. If you're still in the early stages, feeling vulnerable, desperate, or struggling, it's best not to unblock them.
Another aspect to consider is the potential for emotional pain. When you haven't fully healed, the wounds are still raw, right? You find yourself constantly triggered. So, unblocking them is like reopening those wounds. Even if you've been moving forward and living a normal life, just hearing their voice or reading their texts can bring back all those painful memories. It's a trigger that reminds you of the past and the harm they caused. So, by unblocking them just to block them again, you're essentially hurting yourself.
Another crucial aspect to consider is the message you send by unblocking them. It signals to them that you're still available and open to communication, creating a sense of hope for them. They interpret this as an opportunity to try again, perhaps with a different approach. It's like you're indicating that you're within their reach. Consequently, they may persistently continue their attempts to contact you, fueled by the belief that they can still win you back. For instance, you might send them a text one day, and the next, they respond with apologies and promises to change their behavior. By reopening communication in this way, you indirectly show them that you're still invested, giving them a glimmer of hope for reconciliation.
So, it's best not to unblock them at all. If their calls are still bothering you, it suggests there's still some work to be done in you. This is what inner work is all about—reaching a point where their attempts to contact you no longer affect you. Even if they call you 40 times a day, you'll remain indifferent because you understand their desperation. You're aware that there's nothing positive to gain from rekindling a relationship with someone who avoids accountability for their harmful actions. You've internalized this understanding.
So, focus on healing yourself instead of unblocking them. Maintain the block and work on reaching a state where their attempts to reach you won't faze you. Eventually, they'll tire of trying when they realize you're truly moving on and seeking someone else. That's just how life works. Giving them even the slightest bit of attention shows them a way to access you again.
Note from the Author
If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

submitted by relationshipguy254 to healfromabuse [link] [comments]

2024.05.21 02:54 jgoja Weekly Update Comment 5/23/24

Thank you for the report and welcome back.
Sorry for the long one. Somethings have been piling up. I guess this is my welcome back gift. 🎁
In old business. There are still regular reports that posts are submitting and not actually posting on profile or subreddit. The iOS drafts issue where they don't save and can't be accessed, is still present. The algorithm has been as bad or worse than it has ever been. It is especially bad on the mobile apps.
New UI. There is a persistent problem for some when a person replies to a comment and blocks you, all of your comments disappear from your profile until you find and delete that replied to comment. If there were other comments in the same chain, those may need to be deleted as well. It also sometimes includes your overview disappearing. The same thing happens for some when they reply and then block someone. They then have to go and unblock them to get everything to appear. That issue has been quiet this week, so it may have been recently fixed. Right now I have 6 original broken or missing things since the beginning, 3 newer broken things and a list of 18 annoyances on the new UI currently.
The new UI does not show if a subreddit is restricted or private. It also does not show if it is NSFW. I have to switch back to new.reddit to confirm all three. And with the new.reddit going away later this year, I am concerned these will not be fixed in time.
Issues. Reddit's Filters are becoming a major issue. With having no confirmation of what it could be looking for, and no consistent behavior by the Filters, it makes it very difficult to help when these reports come in. Sometimes they seem like subreddit new user restrictions might be the issue or a Reddit new account restriction on posting. Other times, it looks like crowd control. Still more there is no discernable reason why it removed something. I have confirmed it acts as the spam filter also at times. Sometimes it removes all posts after a date. sometimes it is only posts from one subreddit.
Issues. There have been a number of reports recently about media upload times taking exceedingly long or never load. Like 45 minutes for a video and it still did not load.
Issues. We are consistently seeing a number of reports of issues when trying to verify email. The emails never arrive, the link is immediately expired, or the message arrives and when clicking it it takes you back to Reddit without verifying the email.
Issues. For a long time now people will get that bug that says their account is 54 years old. My normal troubleshooting does not fix it usually. How can that be corrected?
This one is more for me, but may be helpful for others. When a user makes a post about their other account "not working", I open my profile and swap my name for theirs. The sh.reddit UI shows different and inconsistent things than the new.reddit UI. It also does give a crazy eyed snoo head when trying to look at new.reddit.
When Shadow Banned: new.reddit shows. Nobody Goes by that name. https://imgur.com/V1zdgcn . While sh.reddit shows suspended. https://imgur.com/a/XfotmLr . But it has also sometimes shows Nobody Goes by that name. https://imgur.com/a/ql2Ttgv
When Suspended: new.reddit shows Suspended. https://imgur.com/csPLq6J While sh.reddit shows Nobody goes By that name. https://imgur.com/a/ql2Ttgv but recently it also gives the suspended image. https://imgur.com/a/XfotmLr
When Account is Deleted: new.reddit shows Deleted. https://imgur.com/a/Gfh024A While sh.reddit shows Nobody goes by that name. https://imgur.com/a/ql2Ttgv
Sometimes it is show as the account is suspended in the sh.reddit.com . https://imgur.com/a/XfotmLr . But when looking on new.reddit.com it shows Something Went Wrong. https://imgur.com/a/Eaes6Dq .
My big concern is that when new.reddit goes away later this year, I will not be able to give accurate advice anymore.
One thing indirectly help related that I have a question on is bugs . Now that everything we can't help fix is going to bugs, is there any information you can share on how it is going to work? In the past, bug report tickets typically took a month or more to get a human answer from redditsupport. Are employees going to be answering on the subreddit? Taking posts down and answering via PM? Is the expectation users will have to fix everything except platform wide issues, even though we can't? Is the timeline going to look the same? I have noticed posts getting removed from bugs, are they removing duplicates like the rules say that will do? How do the users of the removed duplicates get help?

submitted by jgoja to Kalerace [link] [comments]

2024.05.21 02:18 Worst_Artist The Best SEO Plumber Guide From an Industry Expert

https://preview.redd.it/14fax0379o1d1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=4b6ca3fdd40489292ac13df11619863b6f9d4696
Every month “plumbers near me” is searched up to 850,000 times globally.
To thrive, your plumbing business needs to be visible where most potential customers are searching, Google.
This guide will provide you with top Plumber SEO tips to enhance your plumbing business’s online visibility.
First, what is Plumber SEO?
Plumber SEO (Search Engine Optimization) is the practice of affecting local search engine rankings for plumbers.
Why You Should Do Plumber SEO
Plumber SEO is crucial because it helps your plumbing service appear in search results when potential customers in your target area look for the services you offer.
A cool 54% of all clicks go to the top three organic search results.
If you’re not effective with SEO you’re invisible organically.
Can You Do Plumber SEO Yourself?
Yes, you can certainly get started with the basics of Plumber SEO, but advanced SEO, with some elements of Technical SEO, may require a specialist.
The most accessible way to stay abreast of updates is through reputable sources like Barry Schwartz and Lily Ray.
Learn useful techniques by following experienced Local SEO professionals like Joy Hawkins and Darren Shaw.

1. Optimize Your Google Business Profile

Google Local Map Pack
To appear in Google’s local search results, including the Map Pack, start with your Google Business Profile (GBP).
Claim and Set Up Your Google Profile. If you’re not on the map already, add your business name and category. Choose a primary category such as “Plumber” and you can add more later for more specific services like Gas Installation Service, Drainage Service, or Bathroom Remodeler.

Complete Your Profile Details

Review Darren Shaw’s Whitespark Local Search Ranking Factors to see how you should prioritize your time.
If you’re here doing pre-research before you even start a plumbing business take advantage of the knowledge that the keywords in your business name and the proximity to the location you want to rank in are top-ranking factors.
Set up your service area and you can choose up to 20 locations, but the guideline is that it must be no longer than a 2-hour drive from where your business is based.

2. Local NAP Citations

Most business directories list your business name, address, and phone number. These listings are known as NAP citations.

Local Data Aggregators

You can either use a data aggregator service like Data Axle and Foursquare to list you on multiple directories.
There’s also Whitespark who offer customizable citations and connections to large data aggregators.

Get Listed with Free Local Directories

You can also take care of some of the free ones first.
Once you’re verified for Google Business Profile you can import your business onto Bing as well with a few clicks.
Don’t forget to get listed on Yelp as well since Apple Map searches rely on data from Yelp. Facebook, X (Formerly Twitter), LinkedIn Business and Instagram also allow you to put your address.
YellowPages, Better Business Bureau, Nextdoor and Manta are some free ones to get listed on as well.

Paid Plumber Directories

Consider paid services for citations such as Angi’s List, HomeAdvisor, and your local Chamber of Commerce.

Put Your Address on Your Site

Place your address at the bottom of your footer exactly how it’s shown on Google and embed the map to help customers easily access leaving you a review.

3. Boost Your Reviews

Reviews not only enhance your credibility but also improve your SEO rankings. Here are some effective ways to gather more reviews:

Use Google’s Business Profile Manager to manage and respond to reviews.
Get a QR Code that uses a link from GBP to request a review and a Business Card or Fridge Magnet to leave for customers with your website on it.
Follow-Up Contact Requesting Feedback.
Email Signature with your website link and a link to leave a review.

4. Keyword Research

Understanding what potential customers search for helps tailor your website content to meet their needs. Effective keyword research is the foundation of successful SEO.

List Your Services

Start by making a comprehensive list of all the plumbing services you offer. Think about every specific service you provide, no matter how niche.
A detailed list might include: Drain unblocking, Burst pipe repair, Drain Cleaning, Toilet installation, Water heater repair, Sewer line inspection and repair.

Use Keyword Tools

Once you have your list of services, the next step is to use keyword research tools to find relevant keywords that potential customers are searching for.
Google Keyword Planner
Google Keyword Planner
Google’s Keyword Planner is an ultimate keyword research tool that’s free and can help you find keywords, helpful insights, and discover new keywords.

Enter Your Services

Discover New Keywords Google Keyword Planner
Input the list of services you created into the tool. For example, if you offer “drain cleaning” enter this term into the Keyword Planner Discover New Keywords followed by your target city.

Analyze Keyword Suggestions

The tool will generate a list of related keywords, showing their search volumes and competition levels. Look for keywords with a high search volume and low to medium competition. These are the sweet spots that can drive significant traffic to your site.

Include Local Geographic Modifiers

Add local modifiers to your keywords to target searches in your service area. For example, “drain cleaning near me” or “emergency plumber [your city].” This helps attract customers who are looking for services in specific locations.
Now I’ve found a low competition keyword that’s a longtail keyword (keyword phrase with 3+ words) “24 hour emergency plumber Atlanta”.
Check out Keyword Surfer from Matt Diggity to get even more keyword data for free. You can also see the estimated monthly traffic a website domain gets.

5. Website Content & Optimization

Plumber Website Example

Create Service Specific Pages

By creating dedicated, optimized pages for each service, you can attract more targeted traffic and convert visitors into customers. These pages not only improve your SEO but also provide valuable information to potential clients, helping them choose your services with confidence.

Unique Selling Points

Highlight what makes your service unique. This could be your experience, certifications, special equipment, or customer satisfaction guarantees.
Include positive reviews and testimonials from satisfied customers. This builds trust and credibility with potential clients.

Contact Page

Make it easy for visitors to get in touch with you. Throughout your site link to a contact page. Provide your phone number, email address, and a web form for inquiries with your address shown and your service area. Including a call-to-action (CTA) encourages potential customers to take the next step.

Craft Compelling Content

Each service page should clearly describe the service, its benefits, and why customers should choose you. Include certifications, unique selling points, and customer testimonials to build trust.
Create engaging and informative content such as blog posts, FAQs, and plumbing tips to attract and retain visitors. Demonstrate your expertise and authority with pictures from job sites and speak from first-hand knowledge.

6. Build a Strong Link Profile

Guest blogging and engaging in community participation are free ways to build high-quality backlinks and establish your authority in the plumbing industry.

Identify Target Blogs

Find blogs in the plumbing, home improvement, and DIY niches that accept guest posts. Look for blogs with a good reputation and engaged audiences. Use search queries like “plumbing blogs accepting guest posts” or “home improvement write for us.”
Reach out to the blog owners with well-crafted pitches. Propose topics that are relevant to their audience and showcase your expertise. Ensure your pitch is concise and highlights the value you can provide to their readers.
Write well-researched, informative, and engaging articles. Focus on providing valuable insights and practical advice. Include relevant keywords naturally and ensure the content aligns with the blog’s style and tone.
In your author bio, include a brief description of yourself and your plumbing business, along with a link back to your website. Some blogs may also allow you to include a link within the content itself. Ensure these links are relevant and add value to the article.

Join Relevant Communities

Participate in forums and online communities related to plumbing, home improvement, and DIY. Websites like Reddit, Quora, and specialized plumbing forums like PlumbingForums.com are great places to start.
Offer helpful and knowledgeable answers to questions. Avoid blatant self-promotion and focus on providing genuine value. Share your expertise and build a reputation as a helpful professional.

HARO (Help A Reporter Out)

HARO connects sources with journalists looking for expert quotes. This can lead to high-quality backlinks from reputable sites.
Sign up for a free HARO account as a source. You will receive daily emails with journalist requests categorized by industry. Plumbing-related requests might fall under Home & Garden.
Monitor the HARO emails for requests related to plumbing, home maintenance, or small business operations. Respond promptly with concise, informative answers. Highlight your expertise and provide useful insights.
When responding, be detailed and professional. Include your full name, title, business name, and a link to your website. Journalists are more likely to use your quotes if they are well-articulated and relevant to their article.

Replicate Competitors’ Links

Analyzing your competitors’ backlinks can help you discover new link-building opportunities.
Identify your top competitors by searching for your target keywords in Google. Note the websites that consistently appear at the top of the search results.
Use tools like SEMrush or SpyFu to analyze your competitors’ backlink profiles. Enter their domain into the tool to see a list of websites linking to them.
Assess the quality of these backlinks by looking at metrics like organic traffic. Focus on high-quality backlinks from reputable sites.
Look for backlinks that you can replicate. These might include mentions in articles. Reach out to these websites with a similar pitch to get your site linked as well.

Reclaim Lost Links

Reclaiming lost links involves identifying and fixing broken or redirected links pointing to your site.
Use tools like Ahrefs or Google Search Console to identify broken links pointing to your website. These tools can help you find 404 errors and other issues.
Identify links that are redirected to other pages or domains. Ensure that the redirects are still relevant and pointing to the correct pages.
Reach out to the webmasters of the sites linking to your broken URLs. Politely ask them to update the link to the correct page. Provide the exact URL to make it easier for them.
If you have moved content to a new URL, set up 301 redirects from the old URLs to the new ones. This ensures that any backlinks pointing to the old URL still pass on link equity to the new page.

7. Technical SEO & Website Performance

Technical SEO ensures that search engines can find, understand, and index your pages.

Plan Your Site Structure

Plumber SEO Site Structure Example
A well-organized site structure helps visitors navigate your website and allows Google to find all your pages.

Internal Links

Include relevant internal links (links on one page to another on your site) throughout pages to help users easily navigate to important pages.

Concise URL-friendly Slug

SEO Unfriendly URL Slug Example
When making slugs for URLs (characters at the end of the URL, shown above) make sure they’re short and to the point. It’s recommended to be under 70 characters total, that’s including the entire URL. However, it’s important to note that Google is known to truncate URLs depending on devices.
For instance, notice the cut-offs in the below image.
SEO Unfriendly URL Slug Example
With Yoast or Rankmath you’ll be able to see how your page will appear in SERPs (Search Engine Results Pages).

Write Compelling Titles

Your titles should be engaging and accurately describe the content. Use power words and numbers to make your titles more compelling. For example, “10 Easy Tips for Fixing a Leaky Faucet” or “How to Unclog Any Drain in 5 Simple Steps.”
Aim to keep your titles 50 to 55 characters (580px length to be exact, which free meta length checkers can help you with) to ensure they are fully displayed in SERPs and not cut off.
For a blog post on drain cleaning, a compelling title could be: “How to Clean a Clogged Drain: 7 Effective Methods”
Google is known to automatically change the title of your page in search results if it doesn’t match relevance. Follow best title practices to influence the result.

Keep the Meta Descriptions Concise

Clearly summarize what the page is about. Include the most important points that users should know before clicking. For a drain cleaning service page, you might write: “Get expert drain cleaning services in [City]. Our plumbers are available 24/7 to handle any blockage. Call [number] for a free quote.”
Try to keep your meta descriptions concise and within the 160-character limit (920 pixels to be precise) to ensure the full text is visible.
Include your phone number in the meta description as this is clickable on mobile.

Use Clear Headings and Subheadings

Heading Tag Structure Example
Organize your content with clear headings (H1, H2, H3) and subheadings. This not only improves readability but also helps search engines understand the structure of your content.
Break down information into bullet points and numbered lists where appropriate. This makes your content more scannable and user-friendly.

Key Pages to Make

Home Page, About Us, Contact Us
Service Pages
Service Locations (Be careful on this one and follow Google’s guidelines on Doorways)
Service Location City Page
Blogs for Informational Articles and How-To’s

Create and Upload Your Sitemap

Install a Plugin like Yoast or Rankmath to give you some useful SEO tools and create a sitemap to submit to Google and Bing.

Use HTTPS

HTTPS is a secure way for visitors to access web pages. Check if your website uses HTTPS by looking for a lock icon in the browser’s search bar.

Monitor Your SEO Health

Regularly monitor your website’s SEO health using tools like Google Search Console. These tools can help you identify and fix common SEO issues. Key metrics to track include organic traffic, keyword performance, and site health score.

Responsive Design

Responsive design refers to a web design approach that makes web pages render well on a variety of devices and window or screen sizes. It ensures that your website looks and functions correctly on desktops, tablets, and smartphones.

Optimize Images

Large images can slow down your website, leading to a poor user experience, especially on mobile devices with slower internet connections. Optimizing images ensures faster loading times, which can improve both user experience and SEO.
Use a site like TinyJPG to compress images for free.

Simple Layout

A simple, uncluttered layout improves user experience by making it easier for visitors to navigate your site and find the information they need. It also ensures that your site loads faster, as there are fewer elements to load. You can find highly optimized plumber templates that you can use with WordPress.

Click-to-Call Buttons

Click-to-call buttons are crucial for mobile users, allowing them to contact your business with a single tap. This convenience can increase conversion rates and improve customer satisfaction.

Advanced Technical SEO

If you’re savvy on the technical side you can use free diagnostic tools like webpagetest and Google’s PageSpeed Insights to get more details on how to improve your loading speed and other technical optimizations.
Another step is installing and configuring a free caching plugin like WP Super Cache.

Breadcrumbs

You can use breadcrumbs to help Google understand the hierarchy of your site and may help users on their journey through your site.

Local SEO Schema

Add Plumber schema to important pages like the home page, contact, and service pages. You can use Schemantra to create the code to place on your site for free.

8. SEO Content Marketing

Creating valuable content can attract traffic and customers from organic search.

Topic Keyword Research

Finding the right topics to write about is crucial for attracting organic traffic.
Begin with broad keywords related to plumbing, such as “leak repair,” “drain cleaning,” or “water heater maintenance.” Enter these into keyword research tools like Ahrefs Keywords Explorer, Google Keyword Planner, or SEMrush.
Use these tools to find related keywords and phrases that people are searching for. Look for questions and long-tail keywords (phrases with three or more words) that indicate specific user intents.
Instead of just “drain cleaning,” look for “how to clean a clogged drain” or “best drain cleaning services in [city].”
Evaluate the search volume and competition level for each keyword. Ideally, seek keywords with high search volume but low to medium competition. This increases the chances of ranking well without facing too much competition.
When reviewing these keywords go after transactional keywords as these will typically bring you more conversions. “Emergency plumber near me” is a transactional keyword because it has a higher likelihood of the potential customer seeking service. Compare this to an information keyword such as, “What’s the history of plumbing?”.
Analyze the search engine results pages (SERPs) for your target keywords to see what type of content is ranking.
Look for featured snippets, people also ask boxes, and top-ranking articles to understand the type of content Google favors. Keep in mind that when using standard browser settings you’ll see personalized results.
You can use tools like AnswerThePublic for free to find more of what people are asking about a given topic.

For Blogs Use Questions and Informational Keywords

Blogs focus on questions and informational keywords, such as “how-to” guides, tutorials, and tips. Good content written on this tends to attract more engagement and backlinks.

Publish Optimized Blog Posts

Analyze the top-ranking pages for your target keywords to understand the user intent behind the searches. Are people looking for how-to guides, detailed articles, or quick answers? Align your content with what users intend to find.
Ensure your content fully addresses the search query. If users are looking for a guide on fixing a leaky faucet, provide a step-by-step tutorial with images, videos, and troubleshooting tips.
Include Images and Videos
Use relevant images, infographics, and videos to enhance your content. Visual elements can help explain complex topics and keep readers engaged.
Having an embedded YouTube video with a person speaking on the topic or pointing out common plumbing parts can set you apart from many competitors.

9. Promote Your Content

Share your blog posts on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Instagram. Tailor your posts to each platform’s audience and use engaging visuals and descriptions to attract attention.
Participate in relevant Facebook groups, LinkedIn groups, and online communities related to plumbing and home improvement. Share your content when appropriate if it adds value to the discussion.

10. Tracking SEO Progress

Tracking your SEO efforts is essential to understanding what’s working and what needs improvement.

Google Business Profile Performance

Monitoring your Google Business Profile (GBP) performance is crucial for understanding how well your business is performing in local search results.

Check Profile Performance

Log into your Google account and search for your business name. This should bring up your Google Business Profile. Click on the “See profile performance” button to access detailed metrics about how your profile is performing.

GBP Metrics

Views: The number of times your business profile has been viewed. This gives you an idea of how visible your business is in local searches.
Search Queries: The specific queries that led users to your business profile. This helps you understand what terms potential customers are using to find your business.
Customer Actions: This includes actions like visits to your website, requests for directions, calls to your business, and bookings. Tracking these actions helps you understand how effective your profile is at converting views into interactions.
Photo Views: The number of times your business photos have been viewed. High-quality photos can attract more attention and engagement.

Search Console Metrics

This report provides an overview of your site’s performance in Google Search.
Total Clicks: The number of times users clicked on your site in search results.
Total Impressions: The number of times your site appeared in search results.
Average Click-Through Rate (CTR): The ratio of clicks to impressions, showing how effective your site is at attracting clicks.
Average Position: Your site’s average ranking position for the tracked queries.
Search Queries: This section shows the specific queries that users are entering to find your site. Analyze which keywords are driving the most traffic and consider creating more content around those terms.
Pages: Identify which pages on your site are performing best in search. This can help you understand what type of content resonates most with your audience.
Devices: Understand how users are accessing your site (desktop, mobile, tablet). This helps you ensure your site is optimized for all devices, most importantly mobile.

Optimize Based on Insights

Use the data from GSC to optimize your site’s SEO strategy. If you notice that certain pages have a high number of impressions but a low CTR, consider updating the meta descriptions and title tags to be more compelling.
If specific keywords are performing well, create supplemental content around those topics to capture additional traffic.

submitted by Worst_Artist to PlumberSEO [link] [comments]

2024.05.20 23:53 ar_david_hh Armenia on 2024-05-20

11-minute read.

Armenia's military industry is developing

HOST: The share of the domestic arms industry in the armed forces has been rising in recent years. The state has decided to create easier conditions for the development of the industry.
HIGH-TECH MINISTER (Mkhitar Hayrapetyan): Whatever is possible to produce in Armenia with the use of Armenian scientific potential and manufacturing capacities should be done domestically to minimize reliance on imports. The myth that Armenian producers are incapable of creating high-quality products has been shattered.
At the moment, there are ֏170 billion ($438 million) in contracts signed between the defense ministry and 27 representatives of domestic industry. We expect to bring it to ֏190 billion ($490 million) by the end of this year by involving two more companies.
Most contracts are about communication tools, control systems, radio-electronic warfare tools, drones, modernization activities, etc.
LEONID NERSISYAN (expert): It's not a secret that hefty investments were made in the manufacturing of drones. We've also seen a production of 122 mm and 82 mm shells; it's necessary to expand to 155 mm because we are purchasing new [Indian] artillery that uses those.
HIGH-TECH MINISTER: (1) The state is enacting legislative reforms to make the industry attractive for investments. (2) We are promoting R&D for new technologies and the generation of new ideas. We are financing research activities, the creation of prototypes, and their experimentation. The chain ends when a company's product passes the state experimentation process and enters serial production.
HOST: In 2018 the scientific-research budget was ֏2.4B. Today it's ֏4.1B ($10.6M), with an additional ֏1.5B dedicated for prototypes.
MHER MARKOSYAN (expert): We need more laser tech experts. The state must cherish mil. industry employees and encourage young scientists to gain experience.
HIGH-TECH MINISTER: As part of the 2024 budget, we do have a component to train and retrain industry experts. New specialists must enter this industry.
MHER MARKOSYAN: The war in Ukraine has made it more difficult to import components. Something that would normally take 1 week now requires 5 months. There are also horrible logistics problems. We do find solutions to import products but these solutions are expensive.
LEONID NERSISYAN: Even countries under the UN's embargo are able to import weapons so it's a matter of price. For example, it turns out that 70% of the electronics inside North Korean missiles are American.
HOST: Some Armenian manufacturers have reached international levels and could soon begin to export their products. However, there are logistic complications here as well. For example, in 2021 Armenia faced difficulty transporting the mockups of larger weapons to the Abu Dhabi expo [Moscow forced the jet carrying Armenian products to be unloaded and kept delaying the cargo's transfer to Abu Dhabi].
video,

the National Academy of Sciences has received a device that uses powerful lasers to melt metal and ceramic dust to create 3D objects for space and other industries: VIDEO

video,

India's Ambassador about defense cooperation between India and Armenia

AMBASSADOR: Our defense cooperation is proceeding very well. Defense cooperation is not only defense technical cooperation, but also we are looking at capacity building. On both fronts, we are proceeding very well.
REPORTER: During a joint press conference with MOD Papikyan, the Greek Minister spoke about the possibility of Armenia-Greece-France-India quadrilateral cooperation in the defense area.
AMBASSADOR: All 4 states have very good relations but at the moment it is still premature to talk about a quadrilateral format. But yes, there are convergences.
REPORTER: The Indian government said it's going to appoint Defense Attachés to Armenia and several other countries to strengthen the military links. What can you tell us about this?
AMBASSADOR: PM Modi has a very clear-cut policy and initiative of “Make in India”, including in the defense sector. We are now seeing that many countries in the world are buying Indian defense equipment. Defense Attachés are being posted to coordinate the process.

... India's Ambassador about AM-IN economic ties and trade

REPORTER: What was the volume of trade last year, and what trends are seen in the bilateral export and import markets?
AMBASSADOR: The $200 million trade we made was far below the potential. India is the Pharmacy of the World with more than 60% of the vaccines worldwide coming from India, including those supplied through the WHO and other mechanisms like GAVI. So we see more potential here. Both sides are working towards increasing the import of Indian medicines and vaccines into Armenia. We are also looking at the high-tech sector.

... India's Ambassador about Pashinyan's "Crossroads of Peace" trade unblocking project

REPORTER: The Government of Armenia proposed the “Crossroads of Peace” logistics project. There were opinions that it matches with India’s vision in the South Caucasus. What is India’s opinion on this initiative?
AMBASSADOR: When countries need to prosper, connectivity is the key. And connectivity is something that we, in our own region, have been working very closely with our neighboring countries. So similarly, we find that for any region, if you want to move to the next level of prosperity, you need to have connectivity projects. Naturally, we see this “Crossroads of Peace” project of the Armenian government in that light, that it would be a win-win situation for all the regional partners. So indeed for us there is no other way than to have more connections between countries, whether it is in terms of roads, railways, etc. We look at it positively and enthusiastically.

... India's Ambassador about international trade through Iran's Chabahar port

REPORTER: India plays an important role in the development of Chabahar port. You mentioned that the prospects of facilitating the use of Chabahar port for Armenia are being considered as well. What are those possibilities?
AMBASSADOR: The Chabahar port is jointly developed by India and Iran. In our discussions with the Armenian side, they have manifested an interest in using the Chabahar port. Armenia's Minister of Territorial Administration visited the Chabahar port in December. We are waiting for the details from the Armenian side and we will consider it once we receive concrete proposals.
REPORTER: What role can Armenia play in the development of a communication route from India to Chabahar to the Black Sea?
AMBASSADOR: This goes back to my comment about connectivity. Armenia being a landlocked country definitely needs more connectivity projects. If it materializes, I think it would help Armenia to overcome the fact that it is a landlocked country.
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experts at the European Training Foundation will assess Armenia's secondary vocational education system

The European Training Foundation is a European Union agency that helps transition and developing countries harness the potential of their human capital through the reform of education, training and labour market systems, and in the context of the EU's external relations policy.

A group of experts have arrived for the May 21-23 assessment. They will hold consultations with state agencies, students, employee unions, and others.

by 2030, 90 percent of school and college graduates should be able to find jobs and work according to employers' requirements.

source, source, video,

Yerevan and Paris reached an agreement to cooperate in urbanization, transport, and waste management over the next 3 years during a visit by Yerevan Mayor Avinyan to Paris

source,

Yerevan subway is diching Soviet-era physical zhetons (tokens) as part of transport reforms and switch to a universal payment system

OFFICIAL: We are updating a total of 49 entrance gates; it will be completed next month. You'll be able to use the old gates with tokens for now. Soon you will pay with a QR code, Telcell mobile wallet, bank cards, etc. ... last week over 15,000 passengers used the electronic payment methods.
source,

Yerevan municipality launches a process to move garbage containers underground

A public tender is launched to design a pilot program. In October the city said they studied the international practice for collecting the trash from underground bins and found two methods: lifting the bins to allow Yerevan's existing tech to collect the trash, or remove the bins. The latter would be more expensive.
video, video,

government launches the construction of two roads for Tavush border village Kirants: VIDEO

PASHINYAN OFFICE: The 3 remaining coordinates of Kirants were pinpointed with the use of a computer and the border posts will be installed later. The rest [another 8 posts in Kirants] are already there. The good news for Kirants is that around 25 hectares of land that have been unreachable for 33 years will be returned to the village. The border resembles the 1976 line.
As we said earlier, yes, there is a need to build a bypass road, which can be accomplished in 2-3 months. We will also rebuild the road between H-26 and Acharkut and Kirants, which is an alternative road for Kirants. As for property issues, the volumes are small and the government will compensate in such situations. //
The 3 remaining border posts were reportedly installed in Kirants on Monday. Here is how the road issue will be addressed:
Azerbaijan is located between Kirants and Sarigyugh villages. Kirants is currently connected to Sarigyugh with two roads: a direct connection through the interstate road, and a secondary road that connects Kirants to nearby Acharkut before reaching Sarigyugh.
Approximately 300 meters of the direct road falls under the Azerbaijani side, so the government will build a 750-meter bypass road parallel to it. Preliminary construction activities have begun; they are working on the details.
As for the secondary road passing through Acharkut, the government has begun rebuilding and widening it to allow cargo trucks to use it.
So there are currently two construction projects, with one connecting Kirants to Sarigyugh directly, and the second connecting Kirants to Sarigyugh through Acharkut. Both roads are expected to be ready in 3 months.
video, source, video, source, source, video,

Final battle? The opposition co-leader Bagrat Galstanyan will hold a "decisive" massive rally on May 26 to oust PM Pashinyan

GALSTANYAN: Պատմե’ք մարդկանց մայիսի 26-ի մեր հանրահավաքի մասին, այն վճռական է լինելու: //
Former mayor of Yerevan Hayk Marukyan called for Pashinyan and the ruling party to resign. "այլևս անելիք չունեն, նրանք պետք է հեռանան"
source, source,

Serj Sargsyan's HHK party co-leader is against forming an anti-Pashinyan alliance with Edmon Marukyan and Sasna Tsrer

Edmon Marutyan's LHK, Ruben Vardanyan's Aprelu Yerkir, and the Sasna Tsrer (BEVER) whose followers committed terrorists attacks on police stations in 2016 and 2024 have decided to join the ongoing anti-Pashinyan protests led by Kremlin's favorite Archbishop Bagrat Galstanyan.
HHK's Edward Sharmazanov is against forming an alliance with Edmon Marukyan's LHK because they did not actively campaign against Pashinyan's reelection in 2021.
As for Sasna Tsrer, they committed attacks on police stations and called HHK "evil", so Sharmazanov is against working with them.
source,

update: threats after bribes

One of the several low-income residents of Vanadzor who last week reported receiving bribes to join the former regime's ongoing anti-Pashinyan protests says someone called and threatened their family for reporting the bribe to the police. Authorities are investigating the call.
source,

a fight broke out between protesters and students who refused to join the "Holy Struggle" led by Archbishop Galstanyan

AUTHORITIES: On Wednesday we received reports about a fight between the students of Yerevan's Manuk Abeghyan School and protesters. The participants engaged in a fight, disturbed peace, and used slurs. Eight students (all under 18 except for one) were detained.
SCHOOL DIRECTOR: It started after a group of protesters used loudspeakers to encourage our students to join them. After realizing that students didn't want to join, they began to hurl insults at the students. Several students left the building and a fight broke out in the backyard.
source,

82,000 Armenian drivers take advantage of a new law that absolves them of old citation debt if they pay 50%: VIDEO

It was part of a package law that slashes the size of future traffic citations by almost half if the driver pays electronically within the first two weeks of the violation. Some 21,000 drivers have already signed up at police.am to get a discount on their future citations.
It's meant to reduce the financial burden on drivers, the paperwork burden on police, and improve the payment discipline.
source,

Armenian poet and 18th century TikToker Sayat-Nova's statue is unveiled in Turkmenistan during an international forum of Culture Ministers: PHOTO

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Armenia circulates gold collector coin dedicated to Charles Aznavour’s 100th anniversary: IMAGE

Obverse: monument to Charles Aznavour in Gyumri
Reverse: portrait of Charles Aznavour, the number 100 in the form of stylized musical notes, piano keys and microphone.
Minted in Poland. The coin is worth ֏10,000 ($25).
source,

International Criminal Court wants to arrest Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu and Defense Minister Gallant, and the Hamas leadership

PROSECUTOR: On the basis of evidence collected and examined by my Office, I have reasonable grounds to believe that Benjamin NETANYAHU, the Prime Minister of Israel, and Yoav GALLANT, the Minister of Defence of Israel, bear criminal responsibility for the following war crimes and crimes against humanity committed on the territory of the State of Palestine (in the Gaza strip) from at least 8 October 2023:
(1) Starvation of civilians as a method of warfare as a war crime
(2) Willfully causing great suffering, or serious injury to body or health
(3) Willful killing, or Murder as a war crime
(4) Intentionally directing attacks against a civilian population as a war crime
(5) Extermination and/or murder, including in the context of deaths caused by starvation, as a crime against humanity;
(6) Persecution as a crime against humanity
(7) Other inhumane acts as crimes against humanity
full statement, official video 4:57, source,

Iran's President Raisi and Foreign Minister Amirabdollahian die in a helicopter crash while returning from a meeting with Ilham Aliyev to inaugurate the opening of a new dam on the Iran-Azerbaijan border

Shortly before the crash:
RAISI: Maybe someone doesn't like our meeting and joint successes with Azerbaijan. It doesn't matter to us. The important thing is that we implement together whatever is in the best interest of our people. The enemies do not want progress in Azerbaijan and Iran, but we believe that any progress in Azerbaijan is our progress, any threat to the borders of both countries will be a loss for both countries.
ALIYEV: Today the world is witnessing how great the friendship is between Azerbaijan and Iran. We support each other in all international structures and will continue to in the future. No one can divide us. //
Memorial services will be held in Yerevan's Blue Mosque on Thursday.
source, source, source, source, source, Kremlin's conspiracists, source, source,

Azerbaijani dissident activist Arif Yunusov about Iran helicopter crash

REPORTER: Will there be radical changes in Iran after the death of Raisi?
YUNUSOV: I doubt it. The real power is in the hands of Khamenei. Now there are reports about his son [replacing him in the future]. As for the internal disturbances caused by opponents, as you know, there are periodic waves in Iran. These protests are sometimes ethnicity-based. If in the past it was Azerbaijanis, today the protests are by Kurds. There is also the youth that's tired of being ruled by religious mullahs. The death of Raisi doesn't change anything in internal or foreign policies. They will just change the President's last name.
REPORTER: I have a feeling Iran will soon blame Israel for the helicopter crash.
YUNUSOV: I have already seen that on Iranian Telegram channels but official Tehran won't rush with that. They will conduct an investigation and conclusions will be made. If Tehran blames Israel, then there must be good evidence for it because credit where credit is due - Iran usually conducts such investigations quite well. If you remember the liquidation of the father of Iran's nuclear weapons, Israel still denies participation but Iran found enough evidence that Israeli agents used the territory of Azerbaijan to infiltrate, carry out the project, and return through Azerbaijan. Let's wait and see the conclusion of the crash investigation. The accusations by Telegram channels and analysts "don't count".

... Arif Yunusov about AM-AZ border delimitation

REPORTER: Is the ongoing Tavush-Gazakh delimitation really a bilateral process, as Baku claims?
YUNUSOV: No. The U.S. is still interested in the delimitation process and influences both parties behind the curtains. There was a high-profile Azerbaijani visit to Washington. Although the official press release didn't share details, we can safely assume they discussed the AM-AZ relations. If this delimitation continues in spite of Russia that means the U.S. is currently a moderator in this process. This is not purely a bilateral process despite Aliyev's efforts to present it that way.
REPORTER: Is the U.S. a guarantor that the delimitation won't end in Tavush?
YUNUSOV: Not a "guarantor" but the U.S. is the force that is really trying to accomplish something and is actually doing something. The full demarcation will last a long time. The main objective of the U.S. at the moment is the signing of an AM-AZ peace agreement. I don't think they'll be able to sign it before November, however.
REPORTER: How is the Azerbaijani public reacting to the border delimitation?
YUNUSOV: Positively. People truly want to have a demarcated border. The Azerbaijani regime often mentioned "Western Azerbaijan" and the return of Azeris there, but in reality, nobody in Azerbaijan took that seriously because they all understood it was an attempt to pressure Armenia. As soon as information came that the border was partially delimited, it was met with a positive response by the public. The Azerbaijani public understands that it's normal for Azerbaijan to gain and lose control of territories during this process, just as we did during the delimitation with other neighbors.
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submitted by ar_david_hh to armenia [link] [comments]

2024.05.20 19:40 TechnicalKorok Looking for a content filter that allows in-class teacher control

I'm currently in the market for a new content filter and classroom management system. We currently use Lightspeed Relay for content filtering and GoGuardian Teacher for classroom management. We've been a long time Lightspeed customer and while it's mostly (sort of sometimes) worked for us, I get the feeling that the grass may be greener elsewhere.
The key feature I'm interested in is the ability for teachers to temporarily, for an entire class, unblock sites that I have blocked as a baseline. For instance, let's say the "automobile" category is blocked by default. I want teachers to be able to allow that category during their class so students can research used car prices as part of a classroom budget planning activity, but then once they close their classroom management session the category will revert to being blocked as usual.
I'm not interested in student-by-student teacher overrides, or giving teachers access to the content filter admin access to manually enable/disable categories.
I understand that Linewize and Classwize can do this (and are highly recommended by this subreddit) and I'm trying to get a pilot but they don't seem to want my money based on how delayed their communication is. I've also contacted GoGuardian (and a few others, can't find my notes atm) but their responses indicated they weren't able to do what I'm looking for.
We are 1:1 Chromebooks for students, don't need much filtering otherwise so anything DNS-based would be fine for teachers and other staff.
Anyone know of anything that can do this? Should I just keep pursuing the Linewize route?
(Oh, and yes, computer usage during class time is a classroom management responsibility and all that which I 100% agree with, but we do have good reasons for our internet access being so locked down for students since we are a residential program - think along the lines of juvenile court schools or something similar)

submitted by TechnicalKorok to k12sysadmin [link] [comments]

2024.05.20 19:27 Ok_Ladder358 Star Wars: Jedi Survivor - combat and crashes drag down a fun game

Despite the title, there are some elements of this game I really enjoyed. The visuals are great. There were multiple moments where I said to myself "I cant believe how far video game fidelity has come". I also enjoyed the story. For me, the benchmark of a good video game narrative is, "Do I care about what happens to the main characters?" And Jedi: Survivor got me to care about the main characters. The story deals with themes of loss and purpose but these are shallow explorations. I also really liked how it was a semi-open world. I bounced off God of War (2018) because it felt like I was being corralled from arena to arena like livestock. There's a good amount of exploration in this game and it rewards you appropriately for your curiosity. I am going to critique the combat mechanics for this game but none of that applies for the boss fights. They are kinda soulslike where you have to learn the attack patterns and find openings but much more forgiving with the amount of health and stims. As someone who is not great at souls games, the extra stims were nice because it meant more time fighting and I could learn the boss quicker. The mechanics are tuned for single combat which is why the boss fights were my favorite part of the experience. Finally, I love that droid BD-1 so much. They made him so darn cute that I was actually hoping for a section where I could play as the droid. There is so much life and character injected into him with the animations and sounds he makes.(Fun fact: the sound design for BD-1 was done by Ben Burtt, the sound designer the for the original trilogy and the guy who popularized the wilhem scream.) My favorite BD-1ism is when you kneel and meditate to acquire a skill point/extra life or force, BD-1 will hop off your back and sit down next to you, in a very monkey see, monkey do moment. Its so unbelievably cute and endearing that I would commit war crimes for this droid. I could keep going on about BD-1 but then this post would get too long.
However, the combat in this game is so unbelievably frustrating. Specifically, fighting multiple, tough enemies is a huge pain in the ass. What will happen is you are being attacked by 2 enemies and you're blocking and dodging your little heart out and finally you see an opening where no one is railing you so you press x to attack them and finally teach those droids a lesson. But whats this? A third droid is behind you and jumps at you with an unblockable attack? You now have to watch helplessly as that third droid sticks his electro-blade up your keister, which interrupts your attack and staggers you for second. The other two droids have recovered and decide to join the third droid in accessing your prison wallet, at which point they've drained you of 90% of your health and the B2 battle droids shoot in the face and you die.
Now the last paragraph is a bit dramatized and I hope at least one of you chuckled while reading it, but the point is, fighting multiple enemies is not fun. You can't cancel attack animations unless you use the dual blade stance(the weakest stance imo) so strategy becomes, take out ranged enemies first and then run in circles doing chip damage until there's one enemy left and then disembowel him. Just never stay in one place long enough to get triple teamed. There are lightsaber skills and force abilities that can be unlocked that improve you combat ability. The problem is those skills just don't do very much damage and leave you vulnerable to getting attacked so you rarely use them outside of boss fights. I think they should've made it more of hack 'n slash when fighting multiple enemies and then force you to slow down when fighting bosses and mini bosses. Really leaning into the power fantasy of wielding a lightsaber and being a jedi knight. Most of the lightsaber skills are under powered for multiple enemies and by the time you realize that you should be dumping skill points into confusion and telekinesis, you've already maxed out two lightsaber trees and yes the first respec is free but any respec after that costs a skill point??? Like I'm sorry but in what world does spending skills points to respec skill points make sense. The devs are actively punishing players who want to experiment with different stances or force powers and is very frustrating. To be fair, there is no level cap so for players who explore every nook and cranny or just spend a lot of time in the game this won't be a problem. But I mainly followed the story so respecing was costly and I didn't feel like grinding. This is a problem I have with RPGs in general. Unless you have a good reason, make respecing free or cheap. The point of this respec rant is to say that the combat could've been less frustrating if i could experiment with different builds and powers to find solutions.
Finally, this game got railed at launch for performance issues and in my experience these issues are still present. During my ~20 hours of playtime the game hard crashed around 5 times. I don't remember the exact number but it was definitely more than 3 and less than 10. I also noticed stuttering and poor frame rates happening sporadically throughout my play through. The most infuriating crash and the straw that finally broke my dromedarian ass was during the finale. With spoiling anything, there's a section of the game that makes you run a gauntlet where is just keeps sending waves of increasingly tough enemies, some of which were mini bosses in earlier parts of the game. Now I'm not the best gamer so it took me a couple of tries and when I finally finished the gauntlet I was very relieved. I could finally blink and my heart rate could come back down. I go to move on to the next area and the hard crashes without warning.I reboot the game I am back at the last meditation point, erasing not only the gauntlet but around 20 minutes of progress as well. Believe me when I tell you fellow redditor, this broke me. This level of stability is completely unacceptable for a game with a bonfire save system. This game had just erased ~30 minutes of unfun gameplay and this broke me. I put the game on story mode until the final boss fight.
I know just wrote lot of words detailing what I didn't like about Jedi Survivor but I don't think its a bad game. A bad game fails across the board and there's still reasons this game is enjoyable. Being a jedi is a popular fantasy and this game makes you feel like a jedi knight
Tl:dr despite some really enjoyable elements, the combat, the core mechanic of the game, when fighting multiple enemies is so frustrating its drags down what could've been an amazing game. This is due to being underwhelming lightsaber skills, unable to cancel attack animations and respecing is too costly to allow for experimentation

submitted by Ok_Ladder358 to patientgamers [link] [comments]

2024.05.20 07:05 LucyAriaRose Conclusion 10 months later: AITA for breaking my fiancé's family tradition by naming my son what I wanted?

I am STILL NOT the Original Poster. That is still u/Throwaway-BabyName. She posted in AmItheAsshole and entitledparents.
You can read the previous BORU's here and here. New Update marked with ****\* Thanks to u/Choice_Evidence1983 and u/Direct-Caterpillar77 for letting me know!
Trigger Warning: brief mention of murder
Mood Spoiler: happy ending
Original Post: April 16, 2023
Throwaway because I have in-laws on Reddit.
Myself (25F) and my fiancé (27M) have a 2 month old son. We are overjoyed at being parents, but most of my in-laws are refusing to even see our baby because of a decision we made concerning his name.
My in-laws have a tradition of giving the first-born son of every generation the same name. Let's say it's "Peter". This has been going on for about seven generations already, and they're very serious about it. My fiancé's eldest cousin was the latest person to get named Peter. Every one of his cousins has only had daughters so far, so our baby is the first son of his generation, and consequently should get the name.
I have no problem with the name Peter, and would've been okay with naming my son that. Unfortunately, that was also the name of my uncle, who died before I was born. I won't get into details, but it was tragic and traumatizing for my family. My father never got over losing his younger brother.
My grandmother asked the family not to name any of our future children Peter during her lifetime. My MIL and FIL knew about this promise, and at first seemed to not only be okay with us avoiding the name Peter, but also supportive of the one we chose.
However, my grandmother sadly passed away when I was 7 months pregnant. We traveled for her funeral. On our last days there, my in-laws called to offer me their condolences. Then my MIL asked me if I was willing to "think about the name Peter now."
Suddenly, they were insistent that the name we chose was awful and we had to honor their tradition. According to them, they had only agreed to make an exception for us for my grandmother's sake, and had no obligation to keep it now that she had passed.
My family agrees that while it's true we don't have to avoid the name anymore, it still doesn't feel right to use it. My fiancé agrees with me as well, but his parents spent the last weeks of my pregnancy trying to convince us to change our minds about the name.
When our baby was born and we named him what we wanted, my in-laws were furious that we had broken a 7-generation-old family tradition. Some of them hadn't previously wanted to name their sons Peter, but did it anyway for the family's sake. They said our decision was selfish, and that my family "should have moved on by now."
This has truly nothing to do with whether my family has moved on or not, it just felt like a betrayal to my grandmother and uncle's memories to even consider using the name.
My FIL offered us $1000 to change our son's name to Peter after he was born. That was two months ago, and neither of my fiancé's parents have met the baby or seen us since I was pregnant. Most of my in-laws are on their side, and this is causing a huge rift between my fiancé and his family. He assures me he's fine, but I'm starting to feel really guilty about this.
AITA?
EDIT: The tradition started, as far as I know, when OG Peter died and his son, also named Peter, named his firstborn after his father. Peter III ended up having the first son of the following generation, and did the same thing. That one died before having children, so his sister gave the name to her son, and so on. The name “Peter” is very common in my country, so none of them ever got bullied over it, and the fact that it was also my uncle’s name isn’t as unlikely as one might think.
Also, middle names aren’t used in my country. Most people get the maternal surname before the paternal one instead.
EDIT 2: It wasn't 1000 dollars. Different country, different currency. It's still a lot of money, but would probably translate to about 200 USD.
Relevant Comments:
Can you use Peter as a middle name?"
Our country/culture doesn't generally use middle names. If we did, I'd be willing to think about that, even though my son's name doesn't match "Peter"."
How many Peters are alive right now in your family???"
There are 3 living "Peters" in the family right now. Only the eldest (my fiancé's great uncle) actually goes by Peter. The other two have nicknames ("Pete", "Petey", etc)."
OOP is voted NTA
Update Post: May 24, 2023 (a bit over 1 month later)
(OOP's post was removed from AITA, and reposted on her profile. I'm using the date of the AITA post. Comments are also from AITA)
I posted this on AITA, but it got removed about an hour ago because I mentioned a violent encounter on an edit. I tried editing it out and getting it back up, but it didn't work. I'm posting here in case anyone still wants to read it.
Original
Thank you so much to everyone who commented and offered support. A lot has happened since I posted, so I thought I'd give you an update.
About a week after my post, my fiancé's parents contacted us. They apologized for their behavior, and begged to meet my son. They said they were ready to leave the naming debacle behind and truly wanted to be involved in their grandson's life.
We were skeptical, but invited them over to meet the baby. The visit went well. They began coming over almost every day during the next three weeks. I noticed neither of them ever called my son by his name, but I didn't point it out. For the first time in months, things seemed good between my fiancé and his parents.
One day, my fiancé was helping my FIL with something at our place, so my MIL and I went to the park with my baby. Some time later, I had to go to the bathroom, so I left him in the stroller with her.
When I got back, she was sitting on a park bench, chatting with a woman who was cooing over my son. I went over there and introduced myself as "(son's name)'s mom", and she said, "I thought his name was Peter."
I didn't say a word, and neither did my MIL. She followed me to the car and we went back to my apartment. On the way there, I texted my fiancé about what had happened. The moment we got there, he kicked both his parents out of our place.
He'd read my texts and confronted his father. Thankfully, my FIL is a terrible liar, and confessed immediately. Apparently, both my in-laws ONLY call my son Peter. That includes whenever they're talking about him, every time they introduce him to someone else, and even baby-talking to him on the few occasions they were left alone with him. Neither of them are embarrassed by this, and they both think they're in the right.
We're heartbroken. Especially my fiancé. Not only because his parents can't let go of their pride, but also because the name we chose for our son means a lot to us both.
I blame myself for encouraging my fiancé to allow them near our son. I was raised in a different city than all my grandparents, and always wished they could have been more involved in my life. Losing my grandmother didn't help. Pretty much every doubt I had only existed because I thought it would be important for my son to grow up with all of his grandparents around.
But now, all my guilt is gone. If they can't respect my son enough to call him by his name, they don't deserve to be in his life.
I hope they enjoyed the three weeks they had with their grandson. Because that's all they're getting until they get their heads out of their asses.
EDIT: I thought I'd clarify some things. First of all, I'm not comfortable sharing my son's name here, but I promise it's not a "yooneek" name or anything like that. It's perfectly normal and popular-ish in our country.
Secondly, I mentioned this in the comments, but while my family didn't try to dictate me on my son's name, they would never be comfortable with it. My uncle Peter passed almost three decades ago, but it forever changed everyone who knew him. My grandmother's wish might seem a bit irrational, but it was motivated entirely by grief and it didn't seem right to disrespect that just because she's not around anymore.
And to whoever PM'd me that my fiancé's only on my side to keep the peace, he didn't want to use the name either. Months before I got pregnant, he told me he hoped one of his cousins would have a son before we did, because he always hated the tradition and sympathized with my family. He's just as angry at his parents as I am, if not more. Also, most of his cousins and some other relatives have come around and apologized.
Relevant Comments:
Are they this unhinged in other areas of your life too?"
According to my fiancé, they've always been a little entitled, but I never really saw them enough to be able to say that. I will say that, though they were polite, they very clearly didn't care about me until we moved in together. My MIL pretended not to remember my name every time she saw me, and my FIL would lose interest in any conversations that weren't about him. Once it was clear me and my fiancé were in for long term, they started acting a lot more friendly towards me, but it never seemed sincere."
Have other family members come around yet?"
Most of my fiancé's cousins have come around, and his brother was always on our side. His grandmother and some of his aunts and uncles are with us too. His grandfather (divorced from his grandmother), two out of three living Peters (the two oldest) and pretty much everyone else are either still mad at us or haven't reached out to talk about it yet.
My entire family is on my side. They promised not to interfere in the naming process, but are relieved we didn't name him Peter."
One more note on the $1000 offered in the first post:
"And that's $1000 in MY country's currency. It roughly translates to $200USD." (note- OOP clarifies in a comment that she is Brazilian)
OOP drops this horrible bombshell about her uncle, the one who died before she was born:
"My uncle was murdered. My grandmother's request was motivated by trauma."
"Again; my family would be mostly fine with naming my son Peter. My dad and my aunt might have been uncomfortable, and my grandmother asked us all not to do so, but I wouldn't have been disowned if I had. It simply felt disrespectful, especially since my grandmother passed shortly before my son was born.
My uncle's death was traumatic for my family, but the name Peter is hugely common in my country."
Update Post 2: July 28, 2023 (3 months from first post)
My son is now 5 months old (almost six!). We're still NC with my fiancé's parents, who haven't seen us since May. We've both blocked them everywhere. His relatives who were on our side still are, and most of the ones who weren't haven't come around. If anything, they're even more pissed now.
I remember someone suggesting that my fiancé's family might stop using the name after we decided not to. Well, you were right. Last week, one of my fiancé's cousins announced she was pregnant with a boy. She included her baby's name in the announcement, and it's not Peter.
What followed was a string of aggressive Instagram DMs from both MIL and FIL. They both created accounts for the sole purpose of contacting me. I didn't see them until two days later. They sent me almost an hour worth of voice messages about how I'd "ruined their family".
They wish their son had never met me, that he'd see me for "who I truly am", and that I'd never gotten pregnant. Many of the messages ended with "I hope you're happy now", as if they thought they were getting the last word, only to think of something else they wanted to say. There was name calling, an accusation of me cheating, and the persistent refusal to refer to my son as their grandchild.
My fiancé and I listened to the messages together. He hadn't gotten any. As much as I tried to distance myself, I was in tears by the time it was all done. I still don't regret anything, specially after the stunt they pulled back in May, but I'm not completely free of the guilt yet. Not to mention their complete disregard for their grandson. I was already having an overwhelming week, and this just seemed like the final straw.
I must have spent close to an hour sobbing in my fiancé's arms. Once I was calmer, he unblocked his parents just to scream at them for a while. I only heard his side of the conversation, but it was more than enough. He finished the call by saying he didn't want to hear from them again.
We had a long talk afterwards. My fiancé opened up about the emotional blackmail by his family before and after my pregnancy. My in-laws were close to threatening him with anything they could if we didn't name our son Peter. I told him about my guilt, and how awful I feel for putting him through this. We reassured each other, cried a bit more, and had a mostly pleasant evening with our baby.
We contacted his cousin. The family is giving her shit for breaking the tradition again. They're being way less aggressive though, and I think many of my in-laws are finally learning to let go. We're not expecting any apologies anytime soon, but we'll be glad if they come.
Our wedding will be in September 2024, and whoever doesn't give us a sincere apology until then is uninvited. My fiancé's parents are banned either way. We came to that decision together.
Also, I'd like to address some comments on my previous update about how I was "letting my family's trauma win", or how the name wouldn't be hurtful now that my grandmother has passed.
I can't stress enough the damage my uncle's death caused. He was only 30 years old. He had a fiancée, a great career and his whole life ahead of him. I don't know many details about what happened, because I didn't want to upset my family by asking. My grandmother wasn't the only person hurt by this, my entire paternal family was. And if I remember correctly, the person responsible isn't even in jail anymore. It was more than 20 years ago, but the wound never truly closed.
So yeah, I think it's safe to say the tradition is over. The next Not-Peter will be here in January, right before my son's first birthday. It was never my intention for this to turn into such a shitstorm, but I'm so incredibly proud of my little family.
Thank you so much to everyone who shared their stories and offered advice during these last few months. I'll be forever grateful for all the support I got from y'all.
*****New Update Post: May 13, 2024 (13 months from OG post, about 10 from last post)****\*
Hey everyone, it's been a while. I hope you guys had a great Mother's Day!
I remember that last year, I promised myself I'd write a final update as soon as I felt calmer or felt the situation was closer to being solved. That actually happened months ago, but I've been busy lately.
Following my previous update, my fiancé's side of the family remained upset about the tradition being over for a few more months. They were way less intense about it, specially with the pregnant cousin I mentioned, but it was still evident.
That cousin's Not-Peter (almost a year later, I still can't think of a better term) was born in January. Our son turned one the next month. I think the fact that these two things happened so close together helped many of my in-laws let go of the tradition.
We got a few apologies we weren't expecting. Some of them were sincere enough that we slowly started reestablishing contact.
My fiancé's parents were not among those who apologized. We haven't spoken to either of them since last July. From what I've heard from some of his other relatives, however, MIL seems regretful. She has told some of them that she wishes she could be part of her grandson's life, and wonders if making his name a hill to die on was a bad decision. FIL, from what I gather, barely acknowledges my baby exists.
My fiancé knows about how his mother feels, but he says he doesn't care. And even if we did get an apology, I don't think either of us can forgive his parents. As much as we're mostly okay now, it sometimes feels like their treatment of our family ruined the first few months of our baby's life. I know that's not actually true, but I don't want them around my child.
Besides all that, things have been great. My son is 15 months old now, which I don't think I'll ever really get used to. He recently started drawing and has been expanding his vocabulary. He said "mamãe" first, by the way.
My fiancé and I are still getting married in September. We're thinking about moving abroad in a couple years (for work reasons), but we're not sure yet. We also recently got a dog (sadly, we didn't name him Peter).
This will be my final update. Whatever guilt I had about this situation a year ago is completely gone, and my life has been peaceful enough that it feels safe to say the shitshow is over.
Hugo, if you ever find this, you are the most fantastic thing that has ever happened to us. Thank you for letting me be your mom.
Thank you, Reddit, for all the love, advice and support you've given me this past year.
Relevant Comment:
Commenter: Whilst this may be your final update on the naming sage, you said you are getting married in September 2024 and MiL&FiL aren't going to be invited.
Prepare for more craziness from them at that time and good luck :)

OOP: I really do think this is over. My fiancé's parents don't know when or where we're getting married, so I'm not worried about them showing up. They haven't reached out to us in months, and we have no interest in contacting them.

Commenter: Should have named the dog Peter, and giggled every time you called it.

OOP: If it wasn't also my late uncle's name, I'd definitely consider it hahaha

submitted by LucyAriaRose to BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

2024.05.20 05:03 Lorocov I got screwed over majorly

I graduate tomorrow with my twin. I may not be a valedictorian or anything, but I’m still proud of myself for all of my hard work and perseverance throughout the years. I managed to graduate with honors: magna cum laude, and I think it’s a pretty great achievement. I will also be going to a pretty good university with a 45% acceptance rate, which I also think is a pretty good achievement. But during a time that should be about me and my twin, my family decides to feud and I keep getting screwed over.
Starting off, I just need to vent about how unfair it is for twins during graduation season. I’m about to graduate. I don’t need “congrats grad” merchandise, especially with my grad year on it. At least I can pass down the stuff without a glaring “2024” printed on the front. I can’t speak for all grads, but all I want is money to save or spend for my dorm decor. I don’t mean to sound selfish, but all I have gotten was a $5 makeup bag, 6 water bottles with some saying indicating I’m a 2024 grad on it, and some random gift card for $15 for a bunch of places that aren’t even in my local area. Like??? I get I’m a twin and paying double gets expensive, but my parents gave your child and their older sibling $50. On top of that, college tuition is not cheap. No one who isn’t a twin will never understand. I have been screwed over my entire life, and when I finally thought I was gaining independence, people go and do this.
Now to the juicy stuff: family drama!! My life is not the best, but I am grateful for the people in it that actually care for me. Then you have people like my brother, who is ten years older than me, married, has a kid that I haven’t seen in over a year, and still acts like a child. I swear he has some dominance fetish because he is always looking for people to play “following the leader” with. He likes submissive people that essentially bow down to him at every whim and feel grateful when he graces them with forgiveness. When you are graced with his forgiveness after apologizing for something you didn’t do or after being deemed worthy, you can go skip with him in the flower field and pretend like nothing happened. He is arrogant, selfish, and the ultimate narcissist. If you can’t tell, I somewhat hate him, though it wasn’t always like this. My twin and I actually used to adore him before he went psycho, which probably fed his fetish. The reason for his current behaviors is a long story I shall save for another time. Basically, he hates me because I’m not submissive and he doesn’t like that, which is why he likes my twin more because she is very shy and can be taken advantage of very easily. I don’t put up with that, but I am still a girl that can experience emotions of sensitivity and such. Recently, I have actually thrown up after deliberating over this whole situation on repeat on top of graduating, finding a roommate, having feelings that I can’t imagine myself in the future, financial issues, my already present anxiety and depression, having my family constantly confide in me as the “calm one,” etc. It all piles up and it is so mentally draining that I broke. To top it all off, my twin invited this monster to our graduation without my consent. But of course I would have no say. He actually called her today after she told him that she wanted to move forward from this pettiness and visit him with our mom, dad, and me. He had a stipulation: it was either us, the twins, or no one. He is such a coward. Claiming that our poor mother is brainwashing us without even considering the fact that I’m perfectly capable of forming my own beliefs. Our mother loves us all to a fault, and he loves to take advantage of her on repeat by constantly toying with her emotions (for example, he would only unblock her on social media if he wanted her to see something then block her again; he would claim that she is brainwashing us; he called her a narcissist and monster that abused him when he was a kid - total and complete lie by the way. He lived a perfectly comfortable life and had his Xbox taken away once but I digress). Anyways, he basically does not want to come to our graduation, and I am so tempted to send him a very angry message. The only thing that is stopping me are the consequences of my actions in a heated moment since I don’t know if this text will negatively impact my future. But I do know that my brother will have to face the consequences of his actions for being the only one who didn’t attend our graduation, and you bet I am going to hold that over him for the rest of my damn life. I’m going to wave it high and proud like an American flag on the 4th of July because my own brother, that I once had a close relationship with, decided to be a coward just because he wants control and my parents won’t let him. I don’t care if I ever see him again since I know the brother I knew and loved is king gone in all of his hatred. Even during the time I was close to him, he was not who I thought he was. I am now hearing all of these terrible things as I grow older, and he is and was a terrible person, a bully above all else. You so badly want to believe the person you love, especially someone who shares your blood, is inherently good. Now that my rose-tinted glasses were shattered the day he told me to “get the fuck out of my house,” I can now see him for who he truly is. I wish he would just get over himself and finally admit that he isn’t all-knowing or all-dominant. That he needs his family.

submitted by Lorocov to Vent [link] [comments]

2024.05.20 01:35 M_Knight_Shaymalan Why are Vikings built to be annoying; A Thesis by JLNS0KU

Why are Vikings built to be annoying; A Thesis by JLNS0KU
This is both a rant and not, as it's a complete introspective into the faction. This will be talking about lightspam as well, something that's a nonissue in this day and age but still exists, but nevertheless, is still apparent with a few heroes due to a number of reasons. Though I admit, there are exceptions to the rule I have established already. The exceptions would be Raider and Valkyrie, who I never feel cheated or unsatisfied if I win or lose against them. I could never hate these two, so my Raider and Valkyrie mains, you are doing great. You heroes could use some slight buffs or nerfs, but for argument sake you'll be excluded. With the two heroes pushed aside, I will now delve into the history of "lightspamming" and deconstruct every Viking hero one by one in order to deduce what makes them annoying.
As I have previously stated, lightspam is a non-issue in today's time in comparison to the past. You see, when For Honor first released, up until the CCU in year 4, lightspamming was real and efficient. Most were 400mls, near unreactable even in today's time and with the newer consoles for those not on PC. In addition to being faster and more stamina efficient when compared to heavy attacks, they also did much more damage by today's standards. Some went well past 22 damage, and some heroes even had 3 light chains to make spamming all the easier. Of course in reference to Orochi, which brings me to my next point in the past, and how the Samurai were primarily lightspammers. Orochi, Nobushi, and Kensei all had three light chains, Aramusha and infinite light chain, Shinobi had little other options, and Shugoki of course had the hyperarmord light to interrupt any and all offense. The stigma still exists of course against the Samurai for this, but only fools complain about lightspam from Orochi, who had the third light removed a while ago much like Shugoki's armored light. The CCU of course took care of the rest, and it made lightspam nothing short of ineffective.
But my dear reader, it never killed lightspam. Lightspam still exists, far weaker, but equally as annoying in today's time. For no matter if they work against you or don't, your opponent will be adamant to throw it out against you, due to the lack of a fully developed brain. My findings conclude the Vikings, ironic enough, house the de facto light spammer in the game. But my research (getting my ass slapped) revealed much more. Allow me to now dive deeper, and explain the basics of our remaining Vikings.
We shall start firstmost with Warlord, adequately named Borelord by some, with how simple and plain this grease stained Neanderthal really is. I have always stated that Warden is the white bread of For Honor, with how simple he is. If that's the case, Warlord would be equivalent to the stale moldy bread some booger picking child left behind the bleachers during gym. He is a product of his time, forgotten, and both tasteless and unhealthy for you. Despite having absolutely zero redeeming qualities, as he fell out of meta as of late, people still insist on playing this hero. Firstly, I am not one to judge you harshly on your character choice, you are entitled to play who you desire. But in a game with 34 different heroes, you pick the most stale, boring, and bland hero for more than a single rep? I will question your tastes then, but I understand them. Warlord being a product of his time, has not aged well. I do not blame the veterans of this hero, but it does not have to make me enjoy him. He is boring to fight as and to fight, since his kit is extremely limited. Most of the time, Warlord will try to light you over and over to shrink your health pool, so that for the first time in years they may use a heavy and perhaps get the execution. Any reactable maneuver you do, however, will be parried instantly. This means, of course, that your offense becomes that of Warlord, who now has forced you to play his sick twisted game of doing nothing but an opener bash and light attacks. Warlord, who I also like to call Warwar like I was speaking to a toddler incapable of higher thinking, is incapable of doing anything interesting ever. And for some reason, he is one of the last heroes who can easily put you out of stamina, since his parry riposte stuns and eats a chunk of your stamina, and his gb into wall splat eats a third. For the reasons listed, I believe he is one of the most annoying, and unenjoyable heroes. I imagine most Warlord players wanted to play as a fatman, but didn't want to be funny or interesting like Shugoki, so they got second best.
Onto our next Viking, Berserker. Berserker is an interesting case, because unlike Warlord, Berserker is actually strong. Deemed as S-Tier for the past few seasons and still going strong, this hero is an extreme fucking menace that always makes me sigh when I see one. In some odd twist, I've also seen many grow an ego from playing someone so easy, and given a year or so, I imagine this number might grow exponentially and one day reach at least half the amount of Orochi's with ego, but I digress. In Berserker's case, we have another case of lightspam, even though he's not limited to it. You see, this homeless crackhead can feint intio 400 mls lights that are armored. He can easily track dodges on the heavy timing, trade and keep his offense going, or interrupt any offense you have going as well. Most Berserks will throw this out 3-4 times in a row, and think they have some masterclass good at the game. Despite how annoying this is, it's not as nearly as bad as the rest of his kit, who has no weakness. You cannot outtrade him, you cannot outrun him, you cannot outdodge him, and you certainly cannot outdo his absurd feats. His damage can easily reach 40+ on heavies, and his instant hyperarmor enables this easily. If you hated dodge recovery cancels before, then I'm sure you'll hate them combined with instant armored attacks. But while I also understand he's an excellent hero choice, I still believe there's way to many of them. Seriously, every other fucking game there is a Berserker. I've officially counted more Berserkers than Orochi. Orochi. A character whose nickname by the community was Roach, for being a bug you want to stomp and with how many they are. I genuinely wish they take this crackhead out back and break his knees. As a final note onto this mess of a hero, his marching fire armor is fucking ugly.
Our third is Highlander. Personally, I have never ever enjoyed this hero. He has been a mess from day one, with high damage but no reliable way to access it. However he's recently received a rework, so, what does this mean? Well, I actually believe his rework was okay. It granted him much more access to his offensive stance, and gave him more tools to work with. This unfortunately, had the side effect of making him good. If there was any hero that should've stayed bad, it would be Highlander. The idea that his rollcathcer is a command grab that pins you and can easily set up a quick gank is ludicrous, and returning to the light-spam topic for a moment, Highlander can actually do it quite well. Once again, lightspam in this discussion isn't about if it's effective or not, but merely a playstyle of a bygone era most people partake in. That being said, Highlander's offensive stance lights are now 400mls, which actually makes them an effective means to spam with. So this is our third viking who usually will lightspam you somewhat, which once again, is annoying.
Moving on to our fourth, is Shaman. Shaman is an interesting case, as the always delusional Shaman mains believe just because she's bad (she should be) that she can't be annoying (she is). Shaman, in my opinion, is by far the most annoying Viking. But she is not the best light spammer. In fact, she rarely spams lights at all. Shaman is actually a very rare case of a zone spammer, as her shit is extremely annoying and effective. Some dodges will still be caught by her dumb looking flurry of blows. It's her spammiest move by far, and genuinely, Shaman is meant to be spammy. This is because in a stroke of absolute brilliance, Ubisoft decided to give her a lifesteal as an innate part of her moveset. Yes, the most complained aspect about Kyoshin, is just naturally a part of this ugly tweaker. Ensuring that once she gets an insane 17 dmg bleed 400mls stab, she has a healthswing on every thing she does. Her zone is perfect for this at it's four hits or yet another change at a 17 dmg bleed stab. But my friends, it gets far worst. For you see, her bite is even more absurd. Confirmed off GB or by an ally, Shaman's bite does a huge 35 damage, while also healing her for 15. This is a 50 damage health swing, which is absolutely absurd, and should not exist in this game's day and age. Especially when, an ally can easily sneak in a heavy during the bite's wakeup. Many stupid people defend this, by saying Shaman has to work for it through her bleed. But I must retort, does not every hero have to work for their damage? Does Shugo not have to for his hug? Does Jorm not for his slam? Well ignore what I just said, because not even Shaman has to work for her absurd bite. In some sort of unholy alliance, most Nobushi'a have started keeping Shaman's as pets. Any match with a nobu and shaman is most likely a duo, and you can bet they're going to be sitting in eachothers lap all game. One tick from bleed is all it takes for you to lose against them, as Nobushi's 35 damage undodgeable against bleeding foes, allows shamam to get her bite with insane ease. Her bite also guarantees more damage from Nobu, so by being generous, we can say that a Shaman and Nobu gank can be nearly 70 damage. God, I hate this bitch and her stupid hair, and one day I wish Shaman mains may actually learn what good fashion is, so my eyes won't be assaulted while I'm being violated by genderbent Hannibal Lector.
Our fifth is Jormungandr, who actually stumps me quite a bit. His most annoying aspect is his wallsplat, which frankly, I despise that this mechanic has become more common. But that's very little reason to place him with these.... other "heroes". No, I've noticed that most Jormungandrs I come across, also prefer to spam lights. Despite having an interesting kit, nine times out of ten, they will always light, light, zone, light, light. Even more odd, is I feel most I come across rarely let their unblocable heavy fly, instead, choosing to feint it for a light attack. I actually believe this has to be further researched, so it is here I humbly ask the Jormungandr council to investigate themselves, and found out why this might be. I see now I have the least to say about Jormumgandr, but nevertheless, I'd still consider him annoying enough to be listed.
And finally we arrive, to the most, abhorrent, foul, despicable character ever conceived. The pinnacle of how not to design a hero, the de facto lightspammer, who could make even Orochi blush; Vanrangian Guard. Varangian, is by far, the most annoying Viking if I push my Shaman hate boner aside. Ubisoft Montreal was truly cooking, when it came to designing this dumbass character. We shall start firstly by discussing her ability to lightspam, which is frankly uncontested. You see, Varangian has enhanced lights that also have the superior block property. This is not unheard of, what is, however, would be the fact both her dodge attack and her light finisher also have crushing counters. So, by pressing light and light over and over, she'd actually be doing what she's designed to do by the devs themselves. You cannot simply block a light, as that won't stop her offense, and both starter and finisher light give her no reason not to lightspam, as her damage goes up to 20 with a CC. Her CC on dodge attack is also vastly more generous compared to Tiandi or Zhanhu, who require more strict time. Yes, Virginia really is a lightspam machine, who is constantly rewarded by pressing the right bumper over and over. Even if you parry a light attack and get your punish, she'll surely do it again. But my dear reader, we are not done yet, for you see, that's not all that makes this hero annoying. In another stroke of brilliance, no doubt cooked up by Harvard graduates and other brilliant scholars, she can pin you constantly. In order to combat the meta of wide attacks and hitstun, they made a hero who has wide attacks and hitstun. By simply blocking an attack with her shield, she can pin you for a few seconds, easily preventing you from doing anything more. To which, if she so wills it, can do a guaranteed heavy, which will pin you again for an additional amount of time. Vagina is designed, almost directly akin to Warlord, but a modern take that actually makes them a viable pick. Her other mix-up, the orange into soft feint gb, is also taken from another hero, that being JJ. Unblockable soft feint to gb is not inherently annoying, but it's extremely boring and effective, much like everything else about Vag. She's a brick wall who can also attack thanks to her constant CC's and pins. I also don't believe anyone like her or mains her because they find her moveset enjoyable, anyone who says otherwise is clearly a Ubisoft plant to persuade others that she isn't simply lazy design.
This marks the closure of my post, I hope I have enlightened some to the flawed and absurdity of these chosen heroes, and while I do hope they can be changed for the better, I also hope we can all collectively agree that anyone who plays these heroes are less than human, excluding Jormunagndrs, who are on thin ice. As always, I am open to debate to the comments, and will thoroughly explain any questions one may have.

submitted by M_Knight_Shaymalan to ForHonorRants [link] [comments]

2024.05.20 00:24 Emergency-Tough-9108 Whats your advice on this?

Last year my gf left me and moved onto a new relationship a week after breakup. I was really heartbroken this was my first relationship and last. I really didn’t want anyone else except her forever. Fast forward things he new relationship went bad the guy took her for granted and treated her rubbish and in the mean time i still missed her on and off. Most recently i found out where she lived and me and my friend pranked by knocking on her house (just to get her attention). She unblocked me everywhere and messaged me regarding to find oit what my friend wanted and i being me didn’t bother responding because i was also hurt so i wanted her to feel the same on how it feels to be ignored. Then one day i met her and she kept asking me the same question why did my friend knock and i kept blanking her questions on how i got address and everything. Then we met over and over again slowly catching feelings and one day we ended up in bed and then things went to normal gf bf typa things. But then one day she said she can’t do this but this time i didn’t want to let her go as i had caught feelings again and now we are still going ahead with this. I don’t know if i took the right step - i don’t love her the same as i did before, i just feel like its temproary. I do lie to her i want to get married and have kids but really deep down i don’t because of what she done in the past. Really sorry this is long but just wanna know what your guys thoughts are on this.

submitted by Emergency-Tough-9108 to Life [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 17:59 Informal-Okra2281 AITAH for not inviting my dad to my high-school graduation ?

First of all congrats to all 2024 graduates.
This is a long one so yea. My dad has always been a pretty much absent father. Especially financially, with my mom buying us everything we’ve needed , we being my sister and I. I have vivid memories of my dad calling and saying he’s come pick us up for us to spend time with him, only for him to arrive at 10 PM to give us a $10 bill and kiss good bye. we saw him occasionally. We’ve maybe been with a total of 10-20 times throughout the entirety our lives. But as we got older we realized that we weren’t a priority of his.
Right around when COVID hit though my dad began to come around a lot more. But not in the way u may be thinking. See my dad got into hard drugs, with his then gf. Lost my baby brother to CPS, and was basically homeless. So he invited himself to our home, sleeping in my moms car at night and sometimes my mom being the god send that she is was nice enough to let him come in and eat when it got colder out. This was the worst time of my life concerning my father . I saw him in a completely different light and thought very little of him. It just completely stunned me that the only way my dad would come to see his kids is if he had nowhere else to go. He , as most drug addicts was in and out of jail, until one time when he had to stay for a few months longer , and then spent a few months in a halfway house. All throughout this and before my mom never really spoke ill of my father , unless she was arguing with him about some bull shit he was doing while being a druggy and hanging around our house, like doing drugs in our basement. But she always encouraged or even forced us to communicate with him, and try to forgive/ build a relationship with him. Aswell as countless times of my mom helping this man. Giving him money, rides, clothes, and wtv else he asked for.
Well after my dad went to jail that last time and was in the halfway house, he came out a new man. He kicked his drug habit, got his CDL license and was doing great. My sister and I were very proud of him and wanted to give him another chance. We spent 4th of July with him, and hung out with him a couple more times just driving around in his car. And just in general we’re a little closer and more communicative.
Fast forward to the 2 main incidents that led to him not being invited to my graduation . So as I was heading over to a friends house one day my car cut out. My mom was at work with a client (she’s a hairdresser) so I naively thought I could call my dad. He showed up took a look under my hood and realized that id need to get it towed. So I took the initiative to start calling tow companies and try to find the cheapest one. I luckily manage to find a guy that would do it for only $65 . Which if you’re an adult you know how much of an insanely good deal that is. Whilst I’m calling tow companies my dad has spent this time complaining about my moms choice in cars , and basically blaming her for my car cutting out. And also trying to call his sister so he could borrow a tool she had to just hitch my car to her truck and tow it himself. He can’t get ahold of her so I bring up the $65 tow guy. This man starts complaining saying he can do it for free and just wait for his sister to pick it up. Anothe 30 minutes go by and nothing. So i call my mom, and ask her can she cashapp me. Of course she says yes. So I call the tow man myself to get my car towed. The entire time this man is complaining about paying $65 fucking dollars, complaining about my mom buying the car , and complaining saying I hope she doesn’t expect me to pay for this. Mind you he has a CDL license, so he’s making good money and can more then afford to pay it . He paid $30,000 for his car cash and was able to save this money up for it in only a few months, so u do that math for how much he makes. At first I was ignoring him letting him talk shit. But he just kept going on and on and on, and I finally snapped and told him to stop talking about my mom and began defending her. We got into a heated argument that ended with him saying don’t ask him for anything, and me assuring him that I won’t. I had started crying because of how frustrated I was at the situation . I was asking something so little of him and this is how he acted? And he made fun of that saying “I’m not going to cry about it either” this was the last straw and I vowed to never reach out to him again.
I kept that vow despite my moms continuous efforts to get me to talk to him/ unblock him/ forgive him , but I was done. My 18th birthday roles around a few months later. And I decided to be nice and invite him, my thought process was I’m going to college soon , and won’t see him for probably the 4 yrs that id be gone away to school. So why not just try. I didn’t ask this man for anything and just told him where the place of my party was. The time comes and my mom and I are a little late to my party about 10-15 minutes late to getting to the place. He begins texting me asking where we are , and I say we’re a few minutes late, but otw and just resend the address . He starts making excuses saying oh he has work he has to go and wtv else. I say ok that’s fine . He says oh I have a gift I wanted to give you. I say oh you could bring it later when ur off or we could meet somewhere for me to get it tmrw. The next day roles around and I ask him if he worked today and when I could meet him to get the gift. Then he starts talking bs saying, oh I already gave it to ur mom, with the child support card. I’m thinkin oh maybe he can put more money on it and did that for me , for my bday. But no he was referring to the money he is mandated to pay by the state , which he just began paying for the last year or he so he’d been driving trucks. So once I realized this I decided to tell him how bad of a father he was, and yes I did disrespect him and curse him out and I didn’t care. This was really the final straw and I wanted to give him a piece of my mind. And that I did. This is where he really fucked up though. He texted my mom saying to give me the childsupprt card for my bday. My mom uses the $400/ month he pays for our utilities and has them on autopay. And idrc what anyone thinks about that I think it’s a very appropriate use of it. Especially since she pays for wtv else we need and want with no complaints . So she tells him it’s sad that has nothing to give his daughter on her 18th birthday and not to text her phone with the bs telling her what to do with the money. Ig this upsets him because he brings up something’s of my moms past , during a time that was really hard for her. And that was it for my mom. She cut him off too, and though she has not hate for him, she says she’s done allowing people in her life that do nothing but take advantage of and disrespect her. I was relieved to finally have my mother stop pressuring me to spend time with my father, and happy to be done with the stress and pain that he usually causes when he’s around.
Fast forward to now , my Graduation was last week. I only had 8 tickets . And I had already decided to give tickets to my grandma , her 5 kids (my mom , aunts , and uncles) my sister and my favorite cousin. A few days before the graduation whilst at school, a teacher pulls me aside and asks me did Ik my dad tried to come up to my school to get a graduation ticket . I laughed this off. The day of my graduation comes and I find out he was at the place of the graduation trying to find me. I was relieved that we didn’t bump into one another because I truthfully don’t want to see him. But later I felt a little bad when thinking about how he tried to come to the school then still came to the graduation despite not being let in obviously for the lack of a ticket. I don’t know why but my mom is in the same boat feeling guilty that he wasn’t let in on such a big moment. And has began some of her old antics of saying oh can he come to ur graduation party (not the ceremony but a family celebration) my guilt however doesn’t extend this far, and I just can’t give this man yet another opportunity to disappoint me. So what do you think Reddit , am I the asshole?

submitted by Informal-Okra2281 to AITAH [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 12:40 Powerful_Ad5921 Still in love with my high school crush and it's just killing me on the inside

I've been in love with this woman(X) since I was 14 or 15. I'm 26 now. Nearly 10 or 11 years later. We've been close friends on and off througout these years. On and off because I keep trying to cut ties(which I fail to keep cut because I just end up talking to her again). I did it once in high school when she got a boyfriend and then started talking to her again when they broke up, but I never had the balls to ask her out the rest of high school, and finally when it ended I tried cutting ties again before I left for uni(thought it'd be for good this time because we were going to different states, more than 10 hours away from each other). Things were going okay in uni, in my first year, and I found someone else(Y) that I liked, she had a boyfriend(long distance) so I wasn't hitting on her but l'm pretty sure she knew I liked her. We got really close in the first few months of uni, one day she asks me if i like her and I said yes, after which we stopped talking which really fucking hurt because I thought we were close friends. Right after that happened I started texting X again and it was like we never stopped talking. I got caught for weed at my dorm one night and while I was flipping out about being kicked out of the dorm and my parents finding out, she calls me up and one of the worst nights of my life turned out to be the best, and I guess that's when I realized I'm might still be in love with her. And I confirmed I was in love with her when one of our mutual friends told me that she told him that she liked me at some point in high school. But I didn't wanna admit it or tell her because I saw no point since we were 10 hours apart which just made me feel like absolute shit. Prior to college, till shit went south with Y, I'd never smoked(cigs or weed) or drank and was completely against it. One night I decided to get wasted(it was my first time getting drunk, and the last tbh for another 2 years) and since I didnt know any better I had 8 or 9 shots of whiskey back to back after which I got pretty fucked up and out of control and I ended up texting her admitting how I felt in I think a fucking 3 page essay to which I got no response which made me feel like absolute dogshit and I ended up crying the entire night at my friend's place. Next day I was still feeling like shit and I was at another friend's place smoking up and still crying about it to him and he just picks up my phone and calls her up and asks her to talk to me and she tells me she doesn't feel the same which broke me. After that conversation I just decided to just say fuck it, and fuck up my life, and I was just getting high on weed, alcohol or some other substance every day for the next 4 years. I barely attended uni, managed to get a year back. Pretty much wasted 5 years of my life just getting high or drunk. Anyways after that conversation with X, I stopped talking to her till I think my third year of uni. I met her once in twice in between, once when we were both back at our hometown, and once when she came to score some weed with her boyfriend (yeah I was also a dealer in uni). When I got into my 3rd year of uni, one day she hits me up outta nowhere and she said she's coming over to stay with me, and she stayed for like 2 days. I didnt make a move because I am a fucking dumbass, and I thought she just came there because we were friends. I call myself a dumbass because I do not understand signals from women. I'm also calling myself a dumbass because me and X ended up making out last year and she told me that she's wanted to do this for a while and when I asked her when she told me it whenever she came over to stay with me(which happened like 2 times). And the thing is, we made out after not talking to each other for nearly 3 years. After my uni I decided to completely cut ties with her because I knew that I was fucking up my life and one of the main reasons, there were plenty tbh, that were much worse than a girl not liking me but none of that mattered really because I honestly haven't cared about anything or anyone as much as I cared about her and I didnt know how to get her to like me. At the time I even thought it was all her fault(because it's definitely easier to blame someone else for the shit that goes wrong in your life than to admit that you're the fucking problem) and so one night I just sent her this huge message telling her to get the fuck out if my life and how she has ruined it and blocked her. After this I decided to quit smoking weed every day and isolated myself for a good 6 months(well not really by choice, I decided to move to my uncle's house during covid, and he wouldn't let me out because he was scared of getting infected). After the 6 months I went back to my hometown and I meet her the day after I landed(cuz we have mutual friends) and she asked me if i blocked her and I said yeah. We ended up meeting again a couple of times because we pretty much have the same friends, which didn't help me get over her so I just decided to cut out all my friends for like 2 years. And honestly speaking I got my shit together in those 2 years. Now I've never been someone with a lot of confidence my whole life. I've been an addict with no self control. Addicted to different substances, food, porn, cigarettes, just being an absolute waste man. Throughout high-school I was a fatass ugly fucker. I got attractive in uni cuz I smoked weed and lost a fuck ton of weight, I was attractive on the outside but a piece of shit on the inside(I knew it, but no one else really did)so getting attractive really didn't help my confidence a bit. In the last 2 years I finally got my shit together, got over almost all my addictions(smoking was my main, now it's porn, trying to get over it now) started going to the gym regularly and felt happy about myself, and I decided to start talking to my old friends and unblocked X because I finally realized it's not her fault that shit went wrong in my life, but my own which i didn't really admit to her cuz I had too much ego. I didn't even start talking to her, I just unblocked her and started following her socials. We ended up meeting because of our mutual friends, and the second time we met, we got super drunk, and we both started apologizing to each other. Later that night she made a move on me and we made out for a bit. Now I've hooked up with other people, but I've always felt like shit about it because it just never felt good. But I can't forget this fucking night, like it's etched in my fucking memory unlike most things because I have a shit memory. Honestly I forget most things that happen in my life except for moments i spend with her. Thing is I didn't wanna pursue it any further because I was leaving the country to pursue my passion (which didn't work out and I returned back home) and now I feel like it's too late to pursue it, because I don't think she's interested. I don't wanna tell her how I feel either because I've done this before and it's never worked out. I used to keep making excuses about being single to everyone by telling people that i don't have the opportunity to meet a lot of women after college(partially true), but now at my new job I meet plenty of women but I'm not interested in any of them because I know deep down I'm still in love with X. I don't think I can fall in love with anyone else and honestly I don't know what the fuck to do at this point. Worst part is life is going great at this point after being down in the dumps for so long. Got a decent job that I actually like going to, got great friends, have a lot of control over myself, but I still don't feel any happier because I'm not with her. Can't even tell this to anyone cuz our mutual friends think I'm over her, and don't know anything that happened between us. And my other friends just don't support me liking her so I just tell them I don't like her anymore.

submitted by Powerful_Ad5921 to offmychest [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 12:38 Lucky_Lunch1202 Annoying mother.

Idk if this belongs here. If there's a more suitable page, please let me know.
Basically, nothing I ever do is enough. I babysit my sister 3 days a week, from 8am to 8pm. She in herself is another whole issue, but that's due to my mother's coddling, no doubt. During this time, I need to get my sister ready for school, drop her off, pick her up, do a variety of chores (dishwasher is all that she says, but she complains if the floors arent clean and the washing is piled up, so basically i try to do every possibke chore), make dinner for everyone, and feed our outdoor pet.
I don't mind this. My mum works hard. But when she comes home she complains about EVERYTHING. If my sister made a mess of something and I hadn't noticed it, if my sister touched the walls with greasy hands, if my shoes were in front of the door after I went out to feed the pet that her and my little sister got before i even knew. Like nothing is good enough. She's constantly bitching about my sisters, which makes me anxious to do the same. When I'm around her I don't dare grab a coke, snack, or make pasta, because she's constantly dogging on them for this.
One of the worst parts is how she claims she's blunt but everything feels passive aggressive. She will address it to my little sister like "Oh what have I told you about doing this, where's your this, hope you haven't been on that TV all day, what did you eat, oh baby let me go get you another drink." Her tone just screams that she's talking to me. Like, I'm sorry your kid is a literal demon. Idk what happened after I left for university, but my sister was lovely and silly, and she adored me, used to want to be me, and now she's horrifying. "If you don't do this, I'll tell Mum lies about you. If you don't, then you'll ruin my childhood, I love mum and my other sisters more than you."
Besides, nothing is good enough for my mother, I'm perfect. On social media, I'm the best daughter, I'm so smart, and she's so proud, and I'm so beautiful. She wonders why I have no self-worth? Because I've never heard those things to my face. I hear her tell me I have a good figure, but never without hearing, "You don't want to be like your sister. She's too skinny." Oh, I have a nice face? Only because my sister is so punchable.
She reminds me every day that she's a great mother. I'll say well you can be a bit this or that, and she has an excuse for everything." Why you do it doesn't matter. If it hurts, it hurts. What's the point in parenting if the child doesn't find it effective.
I recently told her I think I might have something not quite right with me. A lot of people (mostly AuDHD) say they think I'm autistic or have adhd, and I've thought that for a long time. I have a lot of issues, I wouldn't be surprised if it's just a mixture of many of them that just seems like autism or adhd. Basically, my mother said it's a trend right now and an excuse to be lazy. It was really giving "were all depressed, just stop being a lazy victim" vibes. She also told me I was too normal as a child and refutes all the instances of me being strange. Like when I had a no talking phase, when I told all my friends I didn't like them because they were too hard to talk to, when I cried to my mum basically explaining alexithymia to her because I didn't feel the emotions I expressed, all my various sensory issues I still have to this day that she said we're typical kid behaviour. It's all only gotten worse from there. I feel completely not normal, like I can't explain it. I also have a lot of issues with sounding monotone. Sometimes, I feel like I'm "dropping the act." From a young age, I've always been told off about my tone. If I'm angry, I better not sound it, if I'm sad, if I'm pissed off. I'm always lectured about my tone, but she sounds like she's making passive-aggressive jabs at me all the time, and that's fine.
There's so much more, like so much more. A lot of things she would say never happened. Like how she let my abusive bf take drugs to a holiday and kind of peer pressuring me to do them (I got SAd while I was sleeping that night by him). She said the whole time she didn't like him but didn't tell me in case I got upset. Or that time when I was getting pressured by my bf at 13, and she thought something was going on and just told me if I'm going to do anything I should just ask her for condoms instead of being an idiot. Reading this back, holy shit. One time she was crying and I went to give her a hug and she shooed me away and told me to leave her alone, and then seconds later my sisters aunt did the same thing and she broke down to her even more and hugging her. I was her emotional support child, btw, so obviously, this crushed me as that felt like my only value to her.
But yeah, there's so much idk how to even get into it all. So it probably doesn't seem so bad because this is probably typical parent behaviour. Also, yes, she is a single mother, and I'm grateful, but she has never said sorry to me. Never. It's always sorry you feel that way, but you're dramatic, victimising yourself, lazy, you'll thank me later. Like, no, I won't. Later you'll be estranged. She also has it in my head that no man is good. She keeps warning me of my bf, who yes is a pos sometimes, but better than a druggy rpist? I'd fricking say so, yeah. I tried to OD after breaking up with him. She doesn't even know because if I told her, she'd say I'm stupid and selfish. She also gets annoyed when I unblock my bf (as I broke up with him) to work things out. We're in a hard place, and I'm having complex emotions, and she just wants me to block him and spend time with family and study well. Like, let me grieve, jeez. She also tells me him mother is a psycho jealous bitch and his dad is a pdo. Like excuse me? You met them once, and know nothing about them.
I'm just writing this because I woke up to her complaining about a single cup and some pans that were left out last night (since the dishwasher was on) and saying how it's unfair as she wakes up early and has to deal with it. Why didn't you deal with it by cleaning it if it bothered you? Instead you wait till people are awake to criticise it and make them feel bad. Like we always do the dishwasher, that's one of my babysitting chores. Just ask me to do it nicely when I wake up, why all the backhanded comments and sparky remarks? Just communicate, you're 45, get a grip. She feigns perfection constantly and paints us as a perfect family when one child has cptsd, one has anxiety, I got a shit tonne of issues, and my little sister is an absolute entitled brat who will cry and scream and threaten if not given her way. Literally my sister said she would tell lies about me because I told her to wipe her own ass because I had chores to do (she's 8) and she said my mother would do it and that's why she doesn't love me. I want out of this house, but my mum will fault me for not babysitting as it costs money, and I do it for free.
Ask any questions you'd like. I understand there's not much to go off of, I'm happy to elaborate as I really need to vent I can't lie.

submitted by Lucky_Lunch1202 to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 12:36 Powerful_Ad5921 Still in love with my high school crush and it's just killing me on the inside

I've been in love with this girl(X) since I was 14 or 15. I'm 26 now. Nearly 10 or 11 years later. We've been close friends on and off througout these years. On and off because I keep trying to cut ties(which I fail to keep cut because I just end up talking to her again). I did it once in high school when she got a boyfriend and then started talking to her again when they broke up, but I never had the balls to ask her out the rest of high school, and finally when it ended I tried cutting ties again before I left for uni(thought it'd be for good this time because we were going to different states, more than 10 hours away from each other). Things were going okay in uni, in my first year, and I found someone else(Y) that I liked, she had a boyfriend(long distance) so I wasn't hitting on her but l'm pretty sure she knew I liked her. We got really close in the first few months of uni, one day she asks me if i like her and I said yes, after which we stopped talking which really fucking hurt because I thought we were close friends. Right after that happened I started texting X again and it was like we never stopped talking. I got caught for weed at my dorm one night and while I was flipping out about being kicked out of the dorm and my parents finding out, she calls me up and one of the worst nights of my life turned out to be the best, and I guess that's when I realized I'm might still be in love with her. And I confirmed I was in love with her when one of our mutual friends told me that she told him that she liked me at some point in high school. But I didn't wanna admit it or tell her because I saw no point since we were 10 hours apart which just made me feel like absolute shit. Prior to college, till shit went south with Y, I'd never smoked(cigs or weed) or drank and was completely against it. One night I decided to get wasted(it was my first time getting drunk, and the last tbh for another 2 years) and since I didnt know any better I had 8 or 9 shots of whiskey back to back after which I got pretty fucked up and out of control and I ended up texting her admitting how I felt in I think a fucking 3 page essay to which I got no response which made me feel like absolute dogshit and I ended up crying the entire night at my friend's place. Next day I was still feeling like shit and I was at another friend's place smoking up and still crying about it to him and he just picks up my phone and calls her up and asks her to talk to me and she tells me she doesn't feel the same which broke me. After that conversation I just decided to just say fuck it, and fuck up my life, and I was just getting high on weed, alcohol or some other substance every day for the next 4 years. I barely attended uni, managed to get a year back. Pretty much wasted 5 years of my life just getting high or drunk. Anyways after that conversation with X, I stopped talking to her till I think my third year of uni. I met her once in twice in between, once when we were both back at our hometown, and once when she came to score some weed with her boyfriend (yeah I was also a dealer in uni). When I got into my 3rd year of uni, one day she hits me up outta nowhere and she said she's coming over to stay with me, and she stayed for like 2 days. I didnt make a move because I am a fucking dumbass, and I thought she just came there because we were friends. I call myself a dumbass because I do not understand signals from women. I'm also calling myself a dumbass because me and X ended up making out last year and she told me that she's wanted to do this for a while and when I asked her when she told me it whenever she came over to stay with me(which happened like 2 times). And the thing is, we made out after not talking to each other for nearly 3 years. After my uni I decided to completely cut ties with her because I knew that I was fucking up my life and one of the main reasons, there were plenty tbh, that were much worse than a girl not liking me but none of that mattered really because I honestly haven't cared about anything or anyone as much as I cared about her and I didnt know how to get her to like me. At the time I even thought it was all her fault(because it's definitely easier to blame someone else for the shit that goes wrong in your life than to admit that you're the fucking problem) and so one night I just sent her this huge message telling her to get the fuck out if my life and how she has ruined it and blocked her. After this I decided to quit smoking weed every day and isolated myself for a good 6 months(well not really by choice, I decided to move to my uncle's house during covid, and he wouldn't let me out because he was scared of getting infected). After the 6 months I went back to my hometown and I meet her the day after I landed(cuz we have mutual friends) and she asked me if i blocked her and I said yeah. We ended up meeting again a couple of times because we pretty much have the same friends, which didn't help me get over her so I just decided to cut out all my friends for like 2 years. And honestly speaking I got my shit together in those 2 years. Now I've never been someone with a lot of confidence my whole life. I've been an addict with no self control. Addicted to different substances, food, porn, cigarettes, just being an absolute waste man. Throughout high-school I was a fatass ugly fucker. I got attractive in uni cuz I smoked weed and lost a fuck ton of weight, I was attractive on the outside but a piece of shit on the inside(I knew it, but no one else really did)so getting attractive really didn't help my confidence a bit. In the last 2 years I finally got my shit together, got over almost all my addictions(smoking was my main, now it's porn, trying to get over it now) started going to the gym regularly and felt happy about myself, and I decided to start talking to my old friends and unblocked X because I finally realized it's not her fault that shit went wrong in my life, but my own which i didn't really admit to her cuz I had too much ego. I didn't even start talking to her, I just unblocked her and started following her socials. We ended up meeting because of our mutual friends, and the second time we met, we got super drunk, and we both started apologizing to each other. Later that night she made a move on me and we made out for a bit. Now I've hooked up with other people, but I've always felt like shit about it because it just never felt good. But I can't forget this fucking night, like it's etched in my fucking memory unlike most things because I have a shit memory. Honestly I forget most things that happen in my life except for moments i spend with her. Thing is I didn't wanna pursue it any further because I was leaving the country to pursue my passion (which didn't work out and I returned back home) and now I feel like it's too late to pursue it, because I don't think she's interested. I don't wanna tell her how I feel either because I've done this before and it's never worked out. I used to keep making excuses about being single to everyone by telling people that i don't have the opportunity to meet a lot of women after college(partially true), but now at my new job I meet plenty of women but I'm not interested in any of them because I know deep down I'm still in love with X. I don't think I can fall in love with anyone else and honestly I don't know what the fuck to do at this point. Worst part is life is going great at this point after being down in the dumps for so long. Got a decent job that I actually like going to, got great friends, have a lot of control over myself, but I still don't feel any happier because I'm not with her.

submitted by Powerful_Ad5921 to u/Powerful_Ad5921 [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 10:57 ThrowRA-IcePeachTea Divorced Because of my Personality and Struggling to Cope.

Salam everyone,
I 25f was married (technically still am as it's my Iddah) to my husband 28m.. We met off of Muzz, and he asked for my hand within a few weeks. We ended up married after a month or so.
Things went downhill drastically. I have mentioned elsewhere on Reddit that, he wouldn't want to hug me, he wouldn't want to sit with me. I had to "quickly" kiss him. He wouldn't provide for me usually, I was a uni student, and my mum would help me out, and I would tutor. He didn't look after me when I was sick with the chickenpox or when I partially tore my muscle. If I chew gum for longer than a few minutes he doesn't like it because my breath smells, I can't walk normally apparently, I am too loud, etc.
His family would be mean. They'd laugh at my suggestions of baby names, tell me I'm not their blood, that I'm psychotic and jealous because my family don't sit with me, or jealous because I can't have a baby (don't think that's true...I think I can).
I have tried hard believe me. I tried to soothe him when he wanted to divorce me over another woman. I tried to be patient when his family were being awful. I tried to be patient when he didn't want me. I tried to be patient when I moved to my mum's after uni for a job and he didn't come to visit me because he doesn't want to or he's tired.
Except..in the marriage he would threaten to divorce me. Every few months. First over another woman, then, because he is overwhelmed, and now...he has actually divorced me on paper because apparently my personality is different to his. I am bubbly and outgoing and he wants to be left alone. He says our marriage is causing fitnah for everyone else and he can't cope.
I tried reconciling, I even have paid for him in the past, got him gifts, you name it. He said, he's not interested. And he can't balance me and his family. He's sorry. He blocked me off everything too, except text.
Recently...he's unblocked me. He hasn't messaged me.
The thing is I know I should move on, but here's where it gets more complex. My father SA'd me and was emotionally and physically abusive, so I no longer have contact with him, I have been raped. And I don't really have a wali except for my paternal cousins who can be toxic.
I have 19ish days left of my Iddah, but I am struggling. I feel like I am turning towards sin. I am struggling immensely, crying, doing haram.
I have previously also sinned. The abuse started when I was 5 and then became sexual at 15ish onwards till I was 20ish. I know it's no excuse, but I am diagnosed with BPD, I struggle immensely.
I want to find someone else. I'm worried of the judgement and worried that the wali thing may put them off. I don't know how to approach people, my mum has a very small circle. I feel so let down. I thought my husband would be my final stop after all this abuse...
The divorce happened over the phone and was formalized in writing. He hasn't come to see me since Jan.
When I tell people my divorce is due to my personality, they think I'm joking, until some of them see the texts.
I feel terrible. It's not getting easier. Idk what to do.
Posting here too as from an Islamic point of view people may understand more.
Jzk! Any advice would be appreciated.

submitted by ThrowRA-IcePeachTea to MuslimMarriage [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 10:05 ggwplucky [Abandoned Pools] Sony Connect Track by Track Interview

A while back I was messing around with the Wayback Machine & came across this diamond in the rough on AP's MySpace page. Also found some photos, but most importantly, a track-by-track [Armed To The Teeth] interview from Sony Connect that they did back in '05 (presumably around the same time they did the Sony Connect set with the acoustic songs).
In the interview, Tommy tells the story behind each track on Armed To The Teeth (except Lucky). You'll also find tidbits about the process, lyrically & sonically of these songs, and much more!
If you want to read it/see it from the "raw" source and discover more, here's a link with the Wayback's capture I found on the interview blog: https://web.archive.org/web/20071005015435/http://www.myspace.com/abandonedpools
Now without further ado, the Sonic Connect Interview:
A track by track discussion of Armed to the Teeth from the Sony Connect Store interview:
LETHAL KILLERS TW: As far as how that [demo of the] song was constructed ... I did this trick where I would take a half-time drum loop and sort of nudge it one way and then put in another track and nudge it the other, and we got this sort of double time, rolling drum feel. So that - plus the sort of round-robin type of guitar parts that we have going - was sort of a very easy construction for a song. And then you start moving the bass part around, and, boom, you've got a song.
But I think that lyrically - I want to make it clear that that song isn't necessarily [about] "church is bad, government's bad." I think it's a little bit more complicated than that, though sometimes if you mix the two of religious power and government power, that can be bad for both of them. And I kinda like the idea of not living a life saying, "Well, you better live life in a certain way because then, you know, everything's gonna be great later in heaven." You know, the idea of, like, if this is all we have now, if that idea was just a little bit more embraced, our world could be a little bit better. I just find that a little bit more satisfying, too, if you think like, this is all you have and then you're gonna die. [Laughs] It seems a little bit more like, "Oh, okay, well!" instead of, like, thinking that there's some other life at some other time and you can put things off.
RABBLE TW: Well, a lot of the songs on this record - about two-thirds of it - have to do with a relationship I had that went south, and you know when you go through relationships you always have such a good 20/20 hindsight about things. And I think "Rabble" is just trying to basically say to somebody, "I just wanted to know you better" . . . It's just one of those things where, with this relationship in particular, I wish it would have turned out better. And there's a lot of things that happened that shouldn't have happened, and it's just sort of one of those "oh, what could have been?" scenarios.
THE CATALYST TW: "The Catalyst" is definitely along the same lines. I think the main line in that one is "I wish I could say something beautiful to make you fall in love again." There's a Coachella reference in there, too: "Love has slowly faded away like spotlights shining into space." Have you ever been to Coachella? Of course you have. You know, there's all those spotlights that shoot up in the air. I just thought that was kinda cool, like, how far do those lights really go? "The Catalyst" was also the last song written for the record. It was demoed while we were in the studio. And it's one of those songs that I said two-thirds of the record was written for somebody. That's one of them.
TIGHTER NOOSE TW: "Tighter Noose" is the oldest song on the record by far. It was probably written back in '99, 2000, or somewhere in there. I was thinking about it for the first record [2001's Humanistic], but it didn't really fit in with those kind of songs, so I kept it around and we'd even play it live occasionally. I think it fits in with these songs way better. [As for what "Tighter Noose" is about,] that song is one of those breaking-off-on-your-own- what-have-you-got-to-lose kind of things, because that was written sort of in the wake of when I was in The Eels. It wasn't a terribly happy situation, so I was like, well screw it, I'm just gonna go off and do my own thing. And then it's sort of like, well, you know: "I'm gonna go start my own thing. Uh, I have to learn to sing and write songs now." [Laughs] It's kinda funny: "Screw you guys! I'm gonna go get a deal!" And then like, "Uh oh." But really, I'm a firm believer in that [idea that] you just gotta go for it. And so it was like, well, this is gonna be difficult, but it's gonna be better than what I had before. And actually, with some distance on that situation, I realized I made the right decision and made a lot more money and was a lot more happy as a result. So that was sort of a leap of faith, you know. I didn't want to be someone's stupid bass player. Now I'm my own stupid bass player.
WAITING TO PANIC TW: There was a lull between record companies. The first record [Humanistic] was on Extasy - I don't know if you know about that company, but we were basically the poster-child for the implosion of an indie label. I came off the road in 2002, the label's folding, and I'm like, well, I'm just gonna go back and give this my best shot and we'll get another deal. It seemed highly unlikely, but we ended up doing it. And there was just a lull in there where nobody was interested. I had attorneys not returning my phone calls - that kinda stuff. It felt like, I'm just waiting around and I'm really anxious. So that was a song of frustration that was written and demoed all in one day - it was a song that just came out of me in like eight hours. We also put an EP out [The Reverb EP] and on the EP is the version of that demo that I did in one day. It doesn't happen [like that] very often. Usually I build bed tracks and come back to it a few weeks later and add something, and then come back a couple of days later. This one was all in one shot.
HUNTING TW: My friend Ross Golan, who has his own band Ross Golan and Molehead, had been following the wake of the relationship. He's like, "You just gotta write her a song and use her name." And I'm like, nah, nah, it's not covered enough. And he's like, "No, just do it. Go for it." So I did. I wrote this song and I wrote it for her for her birthday and I used her name, which is in the first lyric of the song, which is "Ginny." So I just went for it and wrote it. It was basically a birthday gift, and it was basically saying, like, you know, "Oops!" [Laughs] It didn't get me very far, but I like the song. We're friends, she's a good girl, absolutely, but back at that time, it was kinda like, "Erraaghhh! Here's a song!" But I like the song and I just think it was one of those times where I was really putting myself out there, and I know she liked it, too. But then, I think that's a myth where you just write a song and all of a sudden the girl just says, "Oh! Okay!" But, you know, hey. There it is. It's on the record.
That's the romantic notion of how they'll react to the song, at least.
TW: Exactly. And I'm really glad we're past that whole ironic phase, which I was part of with The Eels, where everything was super ironic and we'd play "The Macarena" on stage - [sarcastically] and that was funny! I'm glad we're through all that stuff, even though I was still a Beck fan when he was doing all that stuff, too. But I like being sincere and sappy and romantic. I kinda think that's a great thing.
ARMED TO THE TEETH TW: This is one of the first songs written when we came off the road and I had a lot of momentum. If you look at the state of the industry you can see a lot of corporations that seem to have to buy everything in sight. They just have to own everything, and to what purpose? Does it really make the industry much better? No. There's fewer outlets, there's a lot more gatekeepers. They want to buy stuff and it just kinda makes things bad for everybody. All the radio stations play the same shit - except for Indie 103.1 and KCRW in L.A. In spite of it all, I'm just gonna try to do my best and have a career anyway. When we came off the road I felt like I had a lot of momentum. Performing live is inspiring to writing, so it was just the whole idea of, "Alright, now that I have one record under my belt, I'm gonna really go for it in spite of all the forces that be." Even though they're pretty much indifferent to us, [laughs] their actions do affect us. It's sort of a song of bravado.
Why did you also choose "Armed To The Teeth" as the name of the album, too, which, in turn, implies it as the overall theme?
TW: Yeah, which is funny, since I kinda decided on that theme early on, thinking I was gonna go in a certain way, but then, like I said, two-thirds of the record is love songs. So "Armed To The Teeth" doesn't really fit in a certain way, but I also liked it just because [of] that idea of, like, now I'm really ready to make a record, and also I think it reflects the state of the country a little bit. Everything's a little bit aggressive, we're at war, and I thought it was sort of timely in that way
SOONER OR LATER TW: "Sooner Or Later" is another one of those tracks that was written after we got signed, so it's a newer song. I mentioned that sort of double time drum loop thing with "Lethal Killers" - this is the same thing. It's a half time drum loop that I nudged in one direction and then put in another track and nudge it in the other, then "boom," it's double time. And I like that, it's a good effect. It really sets up this kind of overlapping, rolling sound that a real drummer can't do. And things flam a little bit, and I really like that feel, so this song was constructed in the same manner where you have a rolling drum loop and then you put over a couple of guitar parts here and there and all of a sudden you got a song - I think this song is over six minutes. This is, um, I guess it's a couple things. Lyrically, it's sort of saying, like, whatever you do or whatever you say, there's no point in hiding anything because it all comes out in the end - which is the tagline in the chorus. There's no hiding. And in the verse it says, "Sooner or later / It's all coming down." In some way or another, whether you acknowledge it or if it just eats at your self, you can't really get away with anything. It's sort of fatalistic that way, but also in terms of, like, seeing how I also look at as a bigger picture of, like, politically, and since we're at war right now, it seems like things are getting a little scary. And that's kind of like one of those doomsday scenarios. If you look around a little you can really freak yourself out if you're reading about, like, bio-warfare and things like that. So a lot of this talk about "smoking gun in the shape of a mushroom cloud" and all that, it sort of brought up for me a lot of doomsday scenarios. So it's two-fold: it's that doomsday scenario, in terms of as far as the world is concerned, and then, personally, if you do stupid shit then you're eventually gonna pay for it somehow.
SAILING SEAS TW: Like "Hunting," this is probably the most direct, out-there storytelling song. Instead of using her [real] name, it's switched to "Holly," which is in the chorus. So it's another one of those songs talking straight to somebody. And there's a lot of details in there that I wouldn't talk about in normal conversation. That's the funny thing about songwriting where I wouldn't talk about this, but then I can put it in this song and you can still hear it and you still understand, but it's sort of masked a little bit. It's presented in a certain way where it's somehow okay to say that when you're in a major key or something. Because like, the second verse is about pretending you're outside a room listening to somebody [you love] have sex [with someone else], and that's a situation to put yourself into to really torture yourself. I created this scenario in my head and I put it in a song, and it's kinda brutal, but the [beat of the] song is upbeat and happy.
RENEGADE TW: This is a sample-based type song [with] drum loops. The cello was originally a Bjork sample and we replaced it. This one is sort of hard to explain. To me it’s just sort of like just a creation, because some of the record is social commentary, and I think there's a lot of that in this song, and it's like little snippets and ideas, and not necessarily one unifying idea. I think it's just kind of a song based on looking around and taking stock of things. This song in particular isn't really even about anything. It's just, like, observations, pretty much. And, oh, by the way, Billy Howerdel, the guitarist from A Perfect Circle, is playing guitar on that song. He jumped on that track and he's the one that makes it sound scary.
MAYBE THEN SOMEDAY TW: That was one of the first songs written in the wake of the breakup. It was one of those kind of "well-it-just-didn't-work-out-but-maybe-one-day-we'll-see-what-happens" kind of things. Because the circumstances are such that it wasn't gonna happen immediately so I was kinda like, well, we'll see. I don't have much to say about that; it's just grouped in with "songs about her."
GOODBYE SONG TW: That was also written when there was not a lot going on for me and we hadn't really nailed down the record deal. She [Tommy's ex-girlfriend] always thought she was bad luck - she'd show up and bad things would start happening - so she thought it was her fault that I hadn't got a deal. She actually moved away and soon as she did, we got a deal. [Laughs] I think it's funny to sort of say, like the first line of the song is "I'm not washed up / And you're not bad luck for anyone," so, you know, get off the ledge, really. And it's just one of those things; it's one of those yearning songs. I think with a lot of those songs there's a certain amount of effort spent on presenting evidence, like, "Look, I know this is how you feel, but look at all the other stuff." It's almost like making a case for your self [in a song]. And like I said, it didn't get me far, but it's still a good venting process. And I sort of realize when I say things like, "I wrote this for her" or whatever, it's not really for her. It's more self-indulgent to get this stuff out. And in a way you're saying, "Yeah, I wrote this song for you," but no, you wrote it for yourself so you could say things that you felt like saying. So I realize that and I think I realized that while I was writing them, but my job is to write songs so you take from what's around you to make it happen.

submitted by ggwplucky to AbandonedPools [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 07:28 cannykin I'm being harassed by private number.

TW Stalking, harassment, SH
Thursday at 8 am I woke up to a phone call which was unusual, it was private but I was half asleep and thought it might be someone trying to get ahold of me. All I heard was ... well it sounded like someone was getting out of a vehicle or closing a door. I thought I was being butt dialed or something. They call a few more times, I answer a few but mostly decline, nothing. More repeated calls and I pick up and this time a man is moaning my name. I immediately hang up and call the nonemergency police number and all the police really told me was to block the numbers and maybe change my number which I haven't yet but Im probably going to have to. This person called over eighty times in an hour before I could find the 'block unknown numbers' button in my settings because it didn't give me a way to block it in my call history or mid call. He also left two voice mails moaning, making sounds like he was masturbating and sent two text messages from another fake number. I called my carrier to get my call logs from that morning but they said it'll take 35 days. I dont know why it has to take that long. I don't know if it's some guy that knows me or just some random creep that found my number and decided to ruin my sense of safety. I don't know if they're local or foreign because the voice was too low and I didn't recognize it. A localish number slipped through but that be fake/spoofed too. Im honestly terrified. I went to a police station but they told me to go to the one in my town and I went there before on a separate matter months ago just to waste my time going from there, to county police, then back there again so I didn't have much faith in them. I was too emotionally drained to go to my local one today. But I was also told that I need to tell them via text preferably to stop and they're making me uncomfortable. I don't know how 90 percent of declined calls and blocked numbers. I just don't know what more I can do. I don't want to unblock him and hear his voice again. I shouldn't have to change my damn phone because some asshole likes to get his jolly's off traumatizing women. I don't go anywhere and I haven't given out my number in years. If it's someone I knew then they have been holding on to my number for several years. I don't know what advice anyone can give me but any is appreciated. Hell maybe I'm looking for comfort at this point. A private number has called me a few times since but I don't know if they're going to stop or what. Im just scared.

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