I’m 10 years + down the road with R and I’m struggling. I’d love to know how other long term Rs are getting on with issues like this one. Sorry if this is TMI or long.
We have lots that is going good for us, years 3-7 of R were amazing and I felt stronger than ever and in fact, after the tricky first 2 years, until this year I never regretted for a second deciding to R.
We did then hit a few bumps in the road with one of our kids over the last few years and I have been struggling with that because my WH cannot seem to communicate with me at all if conversations feel likely to be “difficult” for him. I work too but in a less financially lucrative role than him since we had the last kids (who were twins) so it tends to be me whose life is organised round his and the family’s needs.
In addition, I did not adjust well when after the pandemic quiet life, he returned to drinking while socialising at work and staying away from home in hotels for work more often. He had minimised this quite a lot after the affair as it was so strongly associated with opportunities he took to have sex with his AP. When he started doing it again it was a trigger for me and his response was one of despair - when would I ever get over this, he was a different man and would not do that again, he’s never good enough etc etc. I end up both apologising to him but also deeply resentful that somehow I’m in the wrong again.
He stopped drinking at work functions for a bit, started again and then stopped again but only because he felt forced to by me being upset, he was very clear that he shouldn’t need to do that. This has never made me happy or reassured me, I now feel pushed into this awful role of the controlling wife when I’m really looking for him to care enough about me not to actually want to drink at work when he’s staying away in a hotel.
I would rather he did what he wanted and we separated but he is very strongly against that and gets quite emotional and sad if I suggest we might both be happier. If I leave, it will be my “fault” at this point because he wants to stay together. Our children don’t know what happened because they were very young at the time and I don’t think that it would be helpful for them but that leaves us in a situation where everyone knows it is me that is unhappy now. I am also frightened to leave because my financial position is unprotected and I feel quite alone in the UK.
My family in NZ would help me but my children are teens/ young adults now so wouldn’t be happy to return to my home country with me. And, fool that I am, I love him, he’s my best friend, when things are good they’re great.
At Christmas we hit an all time low and for the first time I shouted at him in front of the kids about how I feel so abandoned when he can’t talk to me when I am struggling. I felt more and more disconnected from him and started the year in a terrible place crying, lonely and saying how suicidal I felt/ trying to tell him I needed his support with our kids. On that day he didn’t talk to me but he did sit with me and then he just never mentioned what I’d said again.
This is how he treats most of my outbursts of feeling - if I seem distressed enough he might stay with me for a bit of time but he won’t talk about it again unless I do. He might go off and do some random act of service so I kind of know he’s heard but it is hard to focus on that when I want him to talk with me.
Fast forward a week or two and my WH asked to bring a work colleague (also a BW) round on a Saturday for us to give her some emotional support because her mum was away for a fortnight and she was struggling looking after her toddlers by herself, he said she was having such a tough time. She had split up with her WH just before Christmas because he had been having an affair. She lives in her home city and is surrounded by friends and family who love and care for her. She came round and was chatting to me, telling me how it was for the best as they had been drifting apart for a while, that she had been set up with someone by a friend and they’d been texting/ had a date planned. She was not actually by herself, she was going over to her sisters to stay the night and to sit in a hot tub after she’d been at our place.
As I was sitting chatting with her and holding her baby, I had an almost outer body experience where I was at the same time looking down on us talking and also floating above comparing her situation with mine when I was there 12 years ago.
I was alone in a new city where I knew no one except my PIL who had made it clear as soon as we arrived that they didn’t want to offer me any practical support, I had four kids aged 5 and under, my support network of friends were all in the city where we had lived previously, I had lost my job in the move so that my husband could be closer to his parents/ pursue a better job in this city and my father was at the end of his life on the other side of the world a 24 hour flight away.
My husband then began an affair with a younger co-worker and had her round to our house to play with our babies and f*** in our bed while I was home in NZ visiting my family / my sick dad for three weeks. When I got back and discovered what had happened the same day I returned, I had absolutely no one to turn to and only my husband to rely on. He didn’t immediately choose me but thought about it for a few days. He’d planned to go travelling with this woman and had been playing happy families with my babies who weren’t even two years old yet - it felt like he’d been practicing to see whether she would make a good stepmother for them.
I thought about returning to my home, but our initial MC treated me like I was the one suggesting doing something awful to my WH and I never felt ok pursuing that then. My PIL and SIL were not unkind, but they had not supported me before so it was hard for me to turn to them in the circumstances. I had no one. It was the most terrible time of my life and I did try to take some pills one afternoon after drinking too much.
In the day we had his colleague round, I kept thinking, would I have stayed with him if I had been around family and friends. I was also so hurt that he could see her struggles and ask me to help her but not ask me if there was anything he could do to help me. Since then I seem to be locked in a trauma kind of response, crying, reliving stupid details I haven’t thought of in 10 years, checking AP’s work situation etc (pain shopping) and I haven’t slept through the night in months.
I have also been upset for a couple of years by the lack of communication between us as I associate him having had the affair in the first place as a response to my being low when I was in a new city/ had lost my job/ looked after our twins and a toddler on my own all day/ my dad being diagnosed with terminal cancer. He struggled to deal with how I was feeling and withdrew from me, found his AP who was more able to meet his needs/ fun to be around.
This is what emerged in MC, that he couldn’t cope with emotions due to FOO issues. This means I really struggle to voice my feelings in a way that gets me the support I need now because he has withdrawn from me over the last two years during issues with our child and I am fearful of being too much for him again. I know I do it badly, I wanted MC to help me learn better ways of communicating too, not just to deal with how he withdraws from me.
I asked my WH to go to therapy with me a couple of times over the last two years to deal with the communication issues but he didn’t want to do MC because he said he felt unprotected in the two sets of MC we had in the early days.
I have also asked him if we could try just checking in with each other once a week but he is always unwilling and there is always a reason but it boils down to he doesn’t want to do it. He has said it feels forced and as if he has to say something other than he’s fine. He has also said it’s too difficult with his work/ our lives to predict when he’s free. Most recently he has said he’s asked his friends but no one else has to do that. I have said it’s what I need, a regular space where we talk about how we are going. Our MC suggested it 10 years or so ago and I have never stopped wanting that or raising it. However, it’s like this thing in his mind that it would be negative or difficult so he just doesn’t do it except once or twice when things get difficult again. Which then reinforces that it is a negative space. There were a few times we did it a year or so ago where it felt companionable to me so I was devastated when he just stopped because work got difficult for him and needed all his attention.
I feel I am at the bottom of his priorities after the kids, work, meeting football team parents, his parents, work colleagues. Am I mad to ask for that space once a week for an hour together?
Also we have one day of full on intensive therapy planned (a compromise to fit his schedule/fears about traditional MC) and I hope to talk this through with him again there but I am starting to wonder if we are wasting our time/ money.
I don’t know if I’m looking for support or a wake up call but I’d love to hear from long term people in R who have faced similar issues.

Round 2, Pick 33 - Keon Coleman, WR, Florida State:
NFL: After trading back twice on Thursday, the Bills stick at 33 and take a big, physical and athletically gifted target. Coleman isn't fast and isn't a deep threat, but he can win in a variety of ways. But who will Josh Allen's deep threat be? Stay tuned.
CBS Sports: C-. “X” receiver for a WR-needy team. Plays faster than his combine speed but doesn’t separate consistently and isn’t as good of a contested-catch wideout as his size and highlight-reel would indicate. Young though.
ESPN: After trading back twice, the Bills addressed the team's most significant position of need with Coleman, a big outside receiver with the ability to make splash plays -- 12 receiving touchdowns on contested catches since the start of 2022, second-most in the FBS, however, only a 31.7% contested catch percentage in 2023 -- to create separation and a release that general manager Brandon Beane described as "about as good as any." Beane acknowledged that while he's "probably not" going to run away from defenders, Buffalo feels his play speed is faster than the speed he showed at the combine -- 4.61 40-yard dash -- also noting that they liked his athletic ability that came from playing basketball. The Bills needed starting-level talent at outside receiver and Coleman, who turns 21 in May, fits into what Buffalo was looking for, while the team was still able to move back and add picks.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Believes that knitting is the original “Netflix and chill”.
Round 2, Pick 60 - Cole Bishop, S, Utah:
NFL: Safety was a big need for the Bills, and they go back to the Utes for help after taking Dalton Kincaid in Round 1 a year ago. Bishop is a very good athlete and field general who can play the post safety spot and cover a lot of ground. He played like the QB of the Utes' defense the past two years and could be a rookie starter for Buffalo.
CBS Sports: A-. Large, intimidating safety with magnificent movement skill. The QB of the defense. Aligns everywhere. Can wear many hats. Excelled as slot defender and vs. TEs in coverage and runs the alley on outside runs as well as any safety in the class. Ball skills and tackling must improve. Short arms. Need filled.
ESPN: Another pick for the Bills in the second round, another big need addressed. Drafting Bishop adds someone who can compete for a starting role this season, in addition to being a potential answer in the secondary after moving on from Jordan Poyer this offseason while Micah Hyde continues to contemplate retirement. Bishop has the ability to move all over the field, along with speed -- 4.45 40-yard dash -- and many of the qualities and instincts the Bills look for at the position.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: He always weebles and wobbles, but he won’t ever fall down.
Round 3, Pick 95 - DeWayne Carter, DT, Duke:
NFL: When I first watched Carter at the Senior Bowl, I wrote in my notes: "rolling ball of knives." Carter's game doesn't have a lot of pretty to it, but he's a scheme disruptor with his low center of gravity, ferocious style and nasty demeanor.
CBS Sports: B+. Active, high-energy interior rusher who’s on the ground a bit more than what’s desired because of his frenetic style. But it also gets him to the football more often than most DTs. Flashes of swim move and spin just needs to utilize them more. Length is a plus and he works hard vs. run. Some power too. Fills niche need on Buffalo’s defensive front. Needs to use his length better on passing downs.
ESPN: Using the pick acquired via the trade with the Kansas City Chiefs on Thursday, the Bills addressed another hole with Carter bringing depth at defensive tackle. The three-technique tackle will have the opportunity to continue to develop -- potentially as Ed Oliver's backup -- adding to a defensive tackle room that has limited young talent. The Bills didn't draft a defensive tackle last year due to the way the board fell, but the team was able to add to the rotation early this year.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Still says ‘weeeeeeeeeee’ when on a playground swing.
Round 4, Pick 128 - Ray Davis, RB, Kentucky:
NFL: Davis has overcome a lot to reach this level, and though he lacks long speed, he can be a Zack Moss-like player for the Bills. Davis' vision and wicked spin move have left a few defenders in a blender.
CBS Sports: C. Compact, older RB with plus stop-start ability, married to his feet well. Can deploy multiple cuts in a run to make defenders miss. Good, not amazing overall elusiveness though. Quicker than fast too. Will work hard to fight through contact. Has the skills to be fine complementary RB in NFL.
ESPN: With Davis, the Bills add a needed bigger back -- 5-foot-8, 211-pounds -- to pair with James Cook, but also someone who has the ability to catch the football (seven touchdown catches in 2023, tied with Najee Harris for the most by any SEC running back in a season in the last 25 years). Buffalo had a variety of veterans complimenting Cook last season, but Davis, 24, will give Buffalo a power runner and another younger presence in the room, albeit with plenty of collegiate experience from two seasons at Temple, two at Vanderbilt and one at Kentucky.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: This divorce is taking forever Erica why are you doing this?
Round 5, Pick 141 - Sedrick Van Pran-Granger, C, Georgia:
NFL: He's a tough, durable competitor with good anchor strength and three years starting experience for an SEC power, although SVP's lack of athleticism and smaller frame might make him a center-only projection.
CBS Sports: A-. Multi-year starter in the SEC with wrestler’s mentality. Battles through the whistle every snap. Mobility stands out. Explosive short-area quicks. Doesn’t have supreme length and clearly has to add weight/strength to his game. Methodically carries out run-game duties with ease. Second-level climbs etc. Older prospect but comes with high floor.
ESPN: This offseason, the Bills moved on from the team's starting center, Mitch Morse, and backup Ryan Bates. Last year's left guard Connor McGovern is set to slide over to the starting role. Adding Van Pran-Granger brings depth at center -- he allowed one sack his entire career in 1,337 pass-blocking plays, according to Sports Info Solutions -- and a strong candidate for the future at the position with significant starting experience (he started the last three seasons at center for Georgia).
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Is constantly telling people how different things are on Linux.
Round 5, Pick 160 - Edefuan Ulofoshio, LB, Washington:
NFL: In recent years, Buffalo has taken some interesting shots on linebackers in Rounds 3-7, and Ulofoshio continues that trend. He was one of the final players in my top 100 prospect list with his excellent speed, intense style and special teams experience, even if injuries have clouded his projection.
CBS Sports: A-. Six-year LB who starred for a long time as a full-time player in Washington’s program. Big-time tester and it shows on the field. Just takes a second to diagnose. Keen block-avoider as he’s sifting through traffic. Smooth athlete all around but doesn’t quite play to his workout. Reliable tackler who also flashed coverage skill down the seam. High-floor pick here. Crowded LB room.
ESPN: The Bills lost major special teams contributors this offseason, including linebacker Tyrel Dodson and defensive back Siran Neal, while captain linebacker Tyler Matakevich remains a free agent. Ulofoshio adds depth to the linebacker room, but perhaps more importantly, he can find a role on this roster as someone who can make an impact on special teams, an area of priority for the Bills. He has experience from playing six years at Washington, and while he dealt with multiple significant injuries in 2021 and 2022, he played every game in 2023 and earned Washington's Guy Flaherty Most Inspirational Award, the program's oldest and most prestigious honor.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: DROP TABLE card_facts; [please crash your pc, reader].
Round 5, Pick 168 - Javon Solomon, DE, Troy:
NFL: Solomon was a highly productive rusher the past few years in an unusual frame. He's short and undersized at 6-foot-1 and 247 pounds but with nearly 34-inch arms and huge hands. That extra length helps Solomon get to the quarterback, along with his quick burst and non-stop motor. An interesting study for sure.
CBS Sports: A. Burst, bend, speed predicated outside EDGE. Small frame but serious length. Unique build. Doesn’t get engulfed by bigger blockers as much as expected because of his speed-to-power conversion. Hand work is good, not amazing and can flatten to the QB. Motor hums on every play. Bills needed this type of quick winner on the outside.
ESPN: Solomon provides depth at edge rusher, another position of need for Buffalo. He led the FBS with 16 sacks last season and totaled 31.5 sacks since the start of 2021 (also most in the FBS), in addition to 49 career tackles for loss (third in Sun Belt history). Being a Day 3 selection, finding a special teams role will be important for Solomon. He'll also have the opportunity to develop behind the likes of Greg Rousseau, Von Miller -- someone that Solomon has modeled his game after -- and AJ Epenesa.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: He once painted the walls of a Buccees stall, hasn’t been back since.
Round 6, Pick 204 - Tylan Grable, OT, UCF:
NFL: He's a converted Jacksonville State tight end who became a solid left tackle the past two years at UCF. Grable is a quality athlete with great length and potential to be groomed at center, even if he's still learning how to play O-line.
CBS Sports: B. Height and length type at OT who probably plays guard at the next level. Smooth athleticism and can sustain speed throughout the play. Not just quick. Hands are more active and heavy than they are accurate. Good depth add here with positional versatility. Can grow into his frame.
ESPN: Grable started his collegiate career as a walk-on tight end at Jacksonville State, but transitioned to offensive line starting in 2019 and then started 27 games at left tackle while at UCF. He will compete for a roster spot in an offensive line room with veteran players, and said he's prepared to make a switch to a different position if needed. General manager Brandon Beane said that Grable is "gonna have to continue to work on his lower body strength, his power to move guys in the run game, but has great feet you know for pass pro."
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Still refers to Google DUO as Google MEET.
Round 6, Pick 219 - Daequan Hardy, CB, Penn State:
NFL: His return skills might be what keeps him in the league, as Hardy lacks the mass and strength to hold up full time on defense, but sub-4.4 speed is always appealing in a DB.
CBS Sports: A-. Case for most sudden, twitch-up athlete at CB in the class. Super speedy too. Plus recovery talent. Explosiveness in every movement. Not always sticky in coverage but does have high-caliber reps. Check Ohio State game. Erratic tackling and hard to get off blockers because of his size. Chippy in trying to make plays on screens.
ESPN: Hardy brings depth at the cornerback position and skills as a returner. In 2023, he tied the Penn State record for most punt return touchdowns in a season (two) and finished seventh in punt return average (14.6) in school history. Beane noted that if not for the new return rules, he's not sure if they would have picked Hardy, but "this guy can play one of the backup corner spots, but also he's a really nice returner." Buffalo lost multiple players at the returner spot in free agency, and with more focus on it going into this season, Hardy will have the opportunity to compete for the role.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Owns the complete N64 collection including a CIB Conkers.
Round 7, Pick 221 - Travis Clayton, OT, England:
NFL: The Brit, who is 6-foot-7 and 301 pounds with 35-inch arms, ran a 4.81-second 40-yard dash at South Florida's pro day and immediately put himself on scouts' radars late in the process. He's a total project but might be a terrific find with some seasoning, thanks to those unusual athletic traits.
CBS Sports: C+. At 6-foot-7 and 300 pounds with 35-inch arms and a sub 5.00 40-yard dash, this is a ridiculous athlete who is new to football from London.
ESPN: Despite the Bills never seeing Clayton play football, he's an intriguing addition to develop. The initial projection is as an offensive tackle for the 6-foot-7, 303-pound boxer and former rugby player from England after offensive line coach Aaron Kromer came away from watching tape of his workouts. Notably, he ran a 4.79 40-yard dash, faster than all offensive linemen who competed at the combine in the last 10 years. He'll have an opportunity to show the Bills exactly how his skills will translate and what he may be capable of in the NFL, especially as he does not count for a roster spot as part of the International Player Pathway program.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Just like a fantasy draft, the true sleepers can be found in round seven.

I truly believe this and I haven’t seen anyone else talk about it, but being gay is going against our genetic code, as humans we are meant to like the opposite gender in order to reproduce. Just like how people who are attracted to animals have a mental disorder because it doesn’t make sense for a human to be attracted to another species. As a human, you definetly should not be attracted to the other gender. Same thing with people who are trans, you shouldn’t have the biological need to want to be the other gender or be attracted the same gender, I think they should be treated as a mental illness. I don’t have anything against them personally, but I strongly feel as though it’s not a normal thing and it shouldn’t be normalised. Change my mind.

Like with every new creative technology, we are seeing push-back from people both in and outside of creative communities. Cameras were "going to destroy painting"- synthesizers were "going to destroy music"- drum machines and sampled records "invalidated hip hop in 'the arts'"- Autotune "diminishes the value of proficient vocalists"... etc. etc. etc. But eventually, we always come around.
The AI debate has been much more public and much more heated- with many claiming it will be "the end of all human creative pursuits" or saying "we do not want AI to make images, video, or music at all"
The messaging of the people who make these AI tools are partially to blame for this discourse: their promotion/advertisement **is often positioning these as "tools that handle the entire creative process"

Google actually talked to artists, and showed people how they can use these generations as an addition to their existing tool belt and creative process.

_____________________________
With music, they brought in Wyclef Jean and Marc Rebillet

Wyclef talked about how producers have used/modified samples from other works in the past, digging through records to find that perfect sound to add to the sound they've created in the studio manually. He explained that he now has a source of infinite, specified samples and sounds that he can add to the guitars, drums, etc. that he's already recording by hand

Marc is known for live looping and layering of sounds that he's recorded, sampled, or created on the fly. He explained how he can now quickly produce exactly the sound he's looking for to layer into what he's already creating
_____________________________
With film-making and video production, they brought in Donald Glover (Childish Gambino)

His takeaway quote was: "That's whats cool about it, you can make a mistake faster... at least in art, that's what you want: to make mistakes fast" which is something that, at least in my own artistic endeavors, deeply resonates. Curation and refinement- making mistakes and getting closer to the actual intent, is one of the most important parts of creating great art. Knowing what should be kept and what should be left out- taste, and the process of bringing to life that which you imagine accurately. Ben Franklin said it quite succinctly- "The eye [imagination/vision] of a master will do more work than both his hands"

The point being that quickly moving through ideas frees up an artists time for further exploration and refinement- which in turn opens up the creative process to people who might not have pursued it otherwise.
Gambino's second takeaway quote emphasizes this specifically:

"Everybody's gonna become a director, and everybody should be a director- because at the heart of all this is just storytelling. The closer we are to being able to tell each other our stories... the more we'll understand each other"

This is, in my mind, the part of Google I/O where they really knocked it out of the park.

This perspective is how people will come to view generative AI as a way of enhancing creation and self-expression, rather than destroying it. Creative communities will increasingly embrace it, bringing us more, and better art- and perhaps art that wouldn't have ever existed from people with ideas and stories that they never would have told otherwise.

I really strongly believe that this is the lens through which all creative generative AI should be viewed, shared, and promoted. This is the rhetoric and the perspective that creative people need to hear, emboldening and empowering them, rather than making them fearful of being replaced.
I don't often give Google many props... but they really figured this out and nailed the messaging today.
This perspective has the power to shift the conversation and steer creative pursuits in a more positive and capable direction... and potentially to awaken artistry in people who wouldn't have otherwise pursued it- increasing our collective ability to express ourselves and understand one another.

I, like a complete idiot, wasn't really following AI too closely until a month ago. I hadn't seen too much of it recently, so that meant that it wasn't a danger anymore, right? Yeah, what a completely stupid line of thinking. To give you an idea of how out of the loop I was, I didn't know that Sora was a thing until a couple weeks ago. Hell, I didn't even know that the writers' strike was even remotely related to AI until recently.
So I basically went from thinking writing and art were untouchable to realize that they were quickly dying under my nose in the past in three weeks. To say that this has completely shattered my life would be an understatement. I've vomited twice from anxiety the past two weeks when even at my lowest points before, I never did. I got out of high school last year, and planned on going this year, but I just can't bring myself to anymore when any of the jobs I want (writing or art related) might not exist anymore by the time I get out.
To be honest, I don't even care too much about my own career as much as everyone else's. I've always loved reading and watching things that have had care put into them, and to think all of that might be replaced by the plagiarism vomit of a machine makes me sick. A world where no one can practice any sort of art is not one worth living in at all.
So, how do you all do it? I haven't been able to pick up a pencil and even draw something physical in a month without crying. This post has been the only thing I've posted in forever, since I know anything on the internet will just get scraped into another LLM. You all are extremely strong for being able to work on art and have hope for the future despite everything happening with AI.

I met him over the xbox nearly 5 years ago, it’s pretty crazy. We dated for a few months online, and decided it’s better off if we were friends due to long distance (He lives in the USA, i’m from the UK) because he had to stay up late to text me and vice versa!
However, maintained a pretty strong relationship. Until, i got a boyfriend, and he got a girlfriend. I was pretty much the person which cut contact but it was because my boyfriend was pretty mad i had an ex-boyfriend added. Which i get.
(Later after, he breaks up with his GF)
However, i didn’t remove my friend, just had daily streaks and my boyfriend was okay with that.
Until, my birthday! My friend insisted to send me a gift via amazon but i refused because my boyfriend would’ve been fuming about the gesture.
He said, my friend, that it was okay and he’d eventually get me one, one day.
Then, unfortunately, recently, me and my boyfriend got into an argument which put our relationship on hold.
Coincidentally my friend reached out about the gift, he says he saved enough for something small and how i deserve it for being his friend for nearly 5 years. So, i send him a list of my ‘Wish-list’ items and tell him to pick any one as a surprise!
Ranging from £2-£20.
In the meantime, i’ve opened up about mine and my boyfriends situation and he opened up about his. Additionally, talking about me continuously flying out to him and how fast he wants it to happen - i thought it was a bit funny. But in consideration, we’ve been friends for a while.
Eventually, he sends me a screenshot of the parcels (3) sending on the amazon app. And i was angry! ‘’I only said 1.’’ Then he said, ‘’I got 11’’… DUDE.
Out of suspicion i ask what the price was and he said 214 USD. I felt so bad, he works at a burger restaurant! I didn’t expect so much. Soon after, says he’d buy me shoes too!!!
He mentions wanting to make me happy and be the bestest of best people i know, always overthinks if i’m upset and has a pretty built bond with me.
I don’t know why! In a way, i think he likes me. Another side wants to think he’s just a caring friend. I hope he is just being a nice friend, he’s sweet but is not my type an i don’t want to ‘lead him on’ or spend anymore money! Not to mention, i’m in a situationship right now and cannot be loving someone.
He got me; (2) jeans, (1) shirt, (1) shirt bundle, (1) bracelet, (3) stuffed toys, (2) candle packs.
HOW IS THAT 214 DOLLARS.
For context, one of the candles is aromatherapy ‘love sleep candles’ which have ‘sexual’ symbols around the box and RED writing inside which says, ‘French kiss’ and ‘goodnight kisses’. This wasn’t in my Wish list!! is he hinting something?? Am i paranoid.
tl;dr My friend is being a bit too loving.

PHASE 1 :
Launch project.
List Coin Gecko
Achieve 1M Mkt Cap + 1K holders
Maintain daily trending Across Shield & Reddit.
PHASE 2 :
Build market presence & brand take over
* Hit 3K Telegram members
Hit 10M Mkt Cap + 3K holders
* CoinMarketCap Listing
Dex Screener socials update
PHASE 3 :
* +20M Mkt Cap + 5K holders
Tier 1 strategic partnerships & media articles
* CEX Tier 2 listing with KOL support
* Merchandise Bridge to Base
OG leader backing
HE ARE ALL PLEB
PHASE 4 :
MVP Utility & staking income
Activate irl campaigns
High profile fashion partnerships
* No capped ceiling
* New Meta unlocked
$PLEB is a resilient community meme driven by the spirit of unity, resilience, and inclusivity.
$PLEB is a token ran by PLEBZ for PLEBZ, with a strong experienced, well resourced and connected team to fuel the growth. Lead team member is CEO of Changelly …
Token started off with a question of if it was a “Pauly” token because it was launched with one of his ENS’s … Dev, whomever it was, left everything to the community, even the ENS…
The community decided quickly they wanted to move away from him, they fell in love with the name and the strong fellow community members and decided to rebrand…
Our Pleb meme is based on the Roman word Plebeian, representing the masses, or common working people. PLEBZ goal is to climb over the elite to take their rightful place at the top of the classes.
We are known for our Red Blindfold over our eyes.. which is up for personal interpretation … some believe it represents how the commoners aren’t supposed to see what the bureaucrats are truly doing … some think the blindfold is along the lines of lady justice who doesn’t see differences in people .. we are all the same … no matter what people think the blindfold represents our artwork is thought provoking which is refreshing for a meme!
Our strong community ready to make our mark in this space. Plebz are on a fun journey to secure a place in meme history.
See you at 50M next week!
Contract: 0x740a5ac14d0096c81d331adc1611cf2fd28ae317
TG Asia: @ PLEBASIA
TG global: @ PlebzETH
Twitter: https://x.com/plebzerc

Warning: very lengthy
Idk if this is the right flair, but I began writing a response to a question I saw posed here about what tornado we found the most fascinating. I began to write my answer about how fascinated I was by Jarrell and its uniqueness, when a realization hit me that ended up turning my response into a miniature essay that transcended just Jarrell. Credit to OP of that post for really getting me to think about Jarrell, a certain similar tornado, an issue in the weather community, and why I think it’s a good thing to see a potentially strong tornado not do enough damage to earn a high rating.
Jarrell is the tornado that brought my passing interest to my rotation of hyper fixations. Everything about it is so completely abnormal and it’s so well documented. Thirteen minutes and ~5 miles is so brief by (E)F5 standards, yet it did some of the most unimaginable damage by a tornado because of how slow it moved. (E)F5 windspeeds are terrifying when the tornado they’re attached to is moving at a normal pace, but when you’re getting potentially 200 mph tornadic winds staying almost stationary, the damage that can be done is frankly nightmarish.
I find it pretty haunting to think about how, if Jarrell was a more normal F5, some of the people who lost their lives may have actually survived. It went from a pretty unassuming rope doing negligible damage to a three quarter mile wide wedge doing unfathomable damage as one of the most unorthodox tornadoes ever recorded. The scary thing is, while I’ve been on an autism fueled rant about its uniqueness, Jarrell’s most defining feature isn’t so unique that a tornado like it happening is out of the question.
The day is April 30th, 2024. As we all well know, the end of April was a pretty notable time in terms of tornadoes. I’d spent most of my time during performances of the musical I’d just designed for almost entirely on my phone monitoring ongoing tornadoes. Westmoreland had happened the same day, Sulphur, Okemah, and Marietta the day before, and multiple EF3s including Harlan just a few days before. It was a weekday, so I was on a four day break between the two performance weekends. On a whim, I check this subreddit and see posts and comments about "Jarrell part 2" and the odd behaviors exhibited by the night’s storms. I hurriedly check the app formerly known as Twitter and see a PDS warning for Hollister, Oklahoma, and comments under that warning saying much the same thing.
Based on all evidence, that tornado was pretty strong, huge, long-tracked, slow-moving, had abnormal path, and had all the makings of a very notable and high rated storm. The only missing ingredient was damage. As I wrote the part of my response that was solely about Jarrell, this tornado came to mind. It could have been really bad, but it didn’t hit anything. After all was said and done, it was rated as an EF1 tornado, much to many weather enthusiasts’ ire. I am very happy about this rating.
When tornado enthusiasts think about worst case scenario tornadoes, I don’t think it’s a stretch to think that Jarrell is a name that pops up pretty often. There was no preparing for a tornado as unorthodox as the one that hit the small town of Jarrell, Texas, in 1997. As the April 30th tornado shows, though, tornadoes like Jarrell do happen. Jarrell’s most defining factor isn’t so rare that we don’t see tornadoes that fit into a similar category happen from time to time. The thing that makes Jarrell unique among these slow moving, strong tornadoes is that it hit a town, whereas many of its ilk do not. Imagine what the Hollister EF1 may have done if it had hit a town. It could have been another worst case scenario.
There are so many tornadoes that could have potentially ruined and ended lives that just did not because they stayed mostly away from places they could do harm to human life and property. There are tornadoes like Hollister that probably could’ve been EF3+ if they only hit the wrong place. I think that we should celebrate those tornadoes and their low ratings instead of finding ire within them. We should be thankful that unless something happens to change that, we’ll have made it eleven years without an EF5 in just six days from now, because there are tornadoes that could’ve possibly ended that drought if they’d only hit a populated area.
I know this was kind of rambly, but I wanted to share all the thoughts that came along when I was writing that original response that, like the tornado it was originally about, went from something small to something very, very big.

PHASE 1 :
Launch project.
List Coin Gecko
Achieve 1M Mkt Cap + 1K holders
Maintain daily trending Across Shield & Reddit.
PHASE 2 :
Build market presence & brand take over
* Hit 3K Telegram members
Hit 10M Mkt Cap + 3K holders
* CoinMarketCap Listing
Dex Screener socials update
PHASE 3 :
* +20M Mkt Cap + 5K holders
Tier 1 strategic partnerships & media articles
* CEX Tier 2 listing with KOL support
* Merchandise Bridge to Base
OG leader backing
HE ARE ALL PLEB
PHASE 4 :
MVP Utility & staking income
Activate irl campaigns
High profile fashion partnerships
* No capped ceiling
* New Meta unlocked
$PLEB is a resilient community meme driven by the spirit of unity, resilience, and inclusivity.
$PLEB is a token ran by PLEBZ for PLEBZ, with a strong experienced, well resourced and connected team to fuel the growth. Lead team member is CEO of Changelly …
Token started off with a question of if it was a “Pauly” token because it was launched with one of his ENS’s … Dev, whomever it was, left everything to the community, even the ENS…
The community decided quickly they wanted to move away from him, they fell in love with the name and the strong fellow community members and decided to rebrand…
Our Pleb meme is based on the Roman word Plebeian, representing the masses, or common working people. PLEBZ goal is to climb over the elite to take their rightful place at the top of the classes.
We are known for our Red Blindfold over our eyes.. which is up for personal interpretation … some believe it represents how the commoners aren’t supposed to see what the bureaucrats are truly doing … some think the blindfold is along the lines of lady justice who doesn’t see differences in people .. we are all the same … no matter what people think the blindfold represents our artwork is thought provoking which is refreshing for a meme!
Our strong community ready to make our mark in this space. Plebz are on a fun journey to secure a place in meme history.
See you at 50M next week!
Contract: 0x740a5ac14d0096c81d331adc1611cf2fd28ae317
TG Asia: @ PLEBASIA
TG global: @ PlebzETH
Twitter: https://x.com/plebzerc

PHASE 1 :
Launch project.
List Coin Gecko
Achieve 1M Mkt Cap + 1K holders
Maintain daily trending Across Shield & Reddit.
PHASE 2 :
Build market presence & brand take over
* Hit 3K Telegram members
Hit 10M Mkt Cap + 3K holders
* CoinMarketCap Listing
Dex Screener socials update
PHASE 3 :
* +20M Mkt Cap + 5K holders
Tier 1 strategic partnerships & media articles
* CEX Tier 2 listing with KOL support
* Merchandise Bridge to Base
OG leader backing
HE ARE ALL PLEB
PHASE 4 :
MVP Utility & staking income
Activate irl campaigns
High profile fashion partnerships
* No capped ceiling
* New Meta unlocked
$PLEB is a resilient community meme driven by the spirit of unity, resilience, and inclusivity.
$PLEB is a token ran by PLEBZ for PLEBZ, with a strong experienced, well resourced and connected team to fuel the growth. Lead team member is CEO of Changelly …
Token started off with a question of if it was a “Pauly” token because it was launched with one of his ENS’s … Dev, whomever it was, left everything to the community, even the ENS…
The community decided quickly they wanted to move away from him, they fell in love with the name and the strong fellow community members and decided to rebrand…
Our Pleb meme is based on the Roman word Plebeian, representing the masses, or common working people. PLEBZ goal is to climb over the elite to take their rightful place at the top of the classes.
We are known for our Red Blindfold over our eyes.. which is up for personal interpretation … some believe it represents how the commoners aren’t supposed to see what the bureaucrats are truly doing … some think the blindfold is along the lines of lady justice who doesn’t see differences in people .. we are all the same … no matter what people think the blindfold represents our artwork is thought provoking which is refreshing for a meme!
Our strong community ready to make our mark in this space. Plebz are on a fun journey to secure a place in meme history.
See you at 50M next week!
Contract: 0x740a5ac14d0096c81d331adc1611cf2fd28ae317
TG Asia: @ PLEBASIA
TG global: @ PlebzETH
Twitter: https://x.com/plebzerc

PHASE 1 :
Launch project.
List Coin Gecko
Achieve 1M Mkt Cap + 1K holders
Maintain daily trending Across Shield & Reddit.
PHASE 2 :
Build market presence & brand take over
* Hit 3K Telegram members
Hit 10M Mkt Cap + 3K holders
* CoinMarketCap Listing
Dex Screener socials update
PHASE 3 :
* +20M Mkt Cap + 5K holders
Tier 1 strategic partnerships & media articles
* CEX Tier 2 listing with KOL support
* Merchandise Bridge to Base
OG leader backing
HE ARE ALL PLEB
PHASE 4 :
MVP Utility & staking income
Activate irl campaigns
High profile fashion partnerships
* No capped ceiling
* New Meta unlocked
$PLEB is a resilient community meme driven by the spirit of unity, resilience, and inclusivity.
$PLEB is a token ran by PLEBZ for PLEBZ, with a strong experienced, well resourced and connected team to fuel the growth. Lead team member is CEO of Changelly …
Token started off with a question of if it was a “Pauly” token because it was launched with one of his ENS’s … Dev, whomever it was, left everything to the community, even the ENS…
The community decided quickly they wanted to move away from him, they fell in love with the name and the strong fellow community members and decided to rebrand…
Our Pleb meme is based on the Roman word Plebeian, representing the masses, or common working people. PLEBZ goal is to climb over the elite to take their rightful place at the top of the classes.
We are known for our Red Blindfold over our eyes.. which is up for personal interpretation … some believe it represents how the commoners aren’t supposed to see what the bureaucrats are truly doing … some think the blindfold is along the lines of lady justice who doesn’t see differences in people .. we are all the same … no matter what people think the blindfold represents our artwork is thought provoking which is refreshing for a meme!
Our strong community ready to make our mark in this space. Plebz are on a fun journey to secure a place in meme history.
See you at 50M next week!
Contract: 0x740a5ac14d0096c81d331adc1611cf2fd28ae317
TG Asia: @ PLEBASIA
TG global: @ PlebzETH
Twitter: https://x.com/plebzerc

PHASE 1 :
Launch project.
List Coin Gecko
Achieve 1M Mkt Cap + 1K holders
Maintain daily trending Across Shield & Reddit.
PHASE 2 :
Build market presence & brand take over
* Hit 3K Telegram members
Hit 10M Mkt Cap + 3K holders
* CoinMarketCap Listing
Dex Screener socials update
PHASE 3 :
* +20M Mkt Cap + 5K holders
Tier 1 strategic partnerships & media articles
* CEX Tier 2 listing with KOL support
* Merchandise Bridge to Base
OG leader backing
HE ARE ALL PLEB
PHASE 4 :
MVP Utility & staking income
Activate irl campaigns
High profile fashion partnerships
* No capped ceiling
* New Meta unlocked
$PLEB is a resilient community meme driven by the spirit of unity, resilience, and inclusivity.
$PLEB is a token ran by PLEBZ for PLEBZ, with a strong experienced, well resourced and connected team to fuel the growth. Lead team member is CEO of Changelly …
Token started off with a question of if it was a “Pauly” token because it was launched with one of his ENS’s … Dev, whomever it was, left everything to the community, even the ENS…
The community decided quickly they wanted to move away from him, they fell in love with the name and the strong fellow community members and decided to rebrand…
Our Pleb meme is based on the Roman word Plebeian, representing the masses, or common working people. PLEBZ goal is to climb over the elite to take their rightful place at the top of the classes.
We are known for our Red Blindfold over our eyes.. which is up for personal interpretation … some believe it represents how the commoners aren’t supposed to see what the bureaucrats are truly doing … some think the blindfold is along the lines of lady justice who doesn’t see differences in people .. we are all the same … no matter what people think the blindfold represents our artwork is thought provoking which is refreshing for a meme!
Our strong community ready to make our mark in this space. Plebz are on a fun journey to secure a place in meme history.
See you at 50M next week!
Contract: 0x740a5ac14d0096c81d331adc1611cf2fd28ae317
TG Asia: @ PLEBASIA
TG global: @ PlebzETH
Twitter: https://x.com/plebzerc

For staff, Momus seems pretty easily the best. Being able to restore 5 hp when at low health for free is huge, and definitely saved me numerous times. However the increased special damage is equally important. Aspect of melinoe seems… fine? Increased speed of channeling omega spells seems alright but mostly unneeded especially if running the arcana card that slows time when you charge. Circe’s aspect seems pretty bad imo. Serenity isn’t that useful of an effect unless you have no magick regen, which you should have.
All the sister blades aspects seem good. I haven’t used Artemis extensively but it’s solid. Backstab damage from melinoe aspect seems pretty good. Pans aspect however seems the best. When upgraded it’s not dissimilar to Chiron bow from hades 1.
The umbral flames are the opposite. None of the aspects feel that good to me. Eos is sorta clunky and weird to use. Moros would be fun but I often find that the shots bouncing off one another make it hard to actually hit enemies. Melinoe is not the most substantial but omega special is good so making it last longer is solid. Also let’s you stack several at once which is pretty funny.
For the moonstone axe, melinoes aspect is very solid. The axe is slow, now it is not so slow. Nice. Thanatos definitely seems the best though. That crit buildup from omega attacks is really strong as long as you can avoid damage. Charons aspect seems… goodish? I haven’t used it much so it’s hard to say.
Finally the argent skull. I haven’t really used melinoes aspect yet so I’m not sure how good it is but it seems sorta underwhelming. Medea is pretty fun but if you take the wrong boons and upgrades it’s damn near useless. You need to upgrade the aspect a lot and you need % damage on your attack, don’t take stuff like Hestia, Zeus, or Hephaestus. Persephone seems alright but it takes so long to charge up the ability. Extra damage on special is solid. I don’t know which is best because all the aspects for the skull seem sorta weird.
What do you guys think? My favorite aspect as of now is probably Momus but I think they did a good job with most of the aspects. I’m excited to see the final weapon (and presumably the hidden aspects for all the weapons).

Hi folks, I'm new here. Bad childhood, did EMDR a few years ago, not currently in therapy but did so for years with mixed results, have a strong knowledge of the underlying dynamics behind why I behave as I do and have seen an improvement in symptoms.
I have reasonable self confidence but I guess a low sense of self worth? And it manifests primarily in the fact that I get super limerant. I broke up with my partner of 2.5 years in November after trying to make it work in a new country, and since then I've hooked up with 2 people and both times went really poorly. Both were super inappropriate choices.
It's hard being in a new country and I'm lonely. I tried to take my time and eventually I have gotten back on the dating apps but I'm largely disinterested, which I interpreted as healthy given the recent nature of the breakup. But then I met someone at a party this weekend, we hooked up, and now I am limerent even though I'm disinterested, which, after researching - probably goes back to my childhood and my escape fantasies. I've struggled with limerence my whole life. And aside from that, I guess I also feel lonely and annoying and socially unwanted which then feeds back on itself. For the record, I do have a fair number of (not the closest) friends, and people do seem to like me, but my brain struggles to believe. So - back to the old CPTSD drawing board I go.
Has anyone addressed this successfully and if so, how?

This has been updated in both the new and old reddit submission texts located at:
https://www.reddit.com/climbhardesubmit?selftext=true
https://new.reddit.com/climbhardesubmit
The new reddit one unfortunately does not allow formatting, and it's significantly shorter amount of text so it's a compressed version.
BEFORE YOU POST
Post appropriate questions in the "Simple Questions and Injuries" thread sticked at the top.
Training questions format:

1. Amount of climbing and training experience?
2. What does a week of climbing and training look like?
3. Goals - specify your goals beyond "generally improve"
4. Evaluate your strengths and weaknesses. How are you working on them? Examples:

• Grips: Full crimp, half crimp, open hand, three finger drag, etc.
• Terrain: Roof, overhang, vert, slab, compression, etc.
• Technique issues? Are you "good not strong" or "strong not good"?

If you still have questions after your self analysis, post about your training.
Additional resources: sidebar and wiki. Take advantage of these!
This ensures a quality amount of info is available for the members to analyze and make good suggestions. Lazier posts not following this format and of sufficiently low quality may be removed without warning.

EDIT: Sorry this is so long! It's clearly weighing heavy on my mind and I also have a habit of overexplaining myself due to my past. Believe it or not, this was my attempt to keep it short!
As someone raised by a single narcissistic parent, I (25F) have a lot of difficulty in figuring out if my perception is accurate or if I'm misinterpreting things. I've spent years working on this in therapy and have made progress in figuring out when I'm being treated poorly, specifically in platonic relationships, but have still a ways to go.
Recently, I've gotten into a relationship with my bf (29M) after having been single for 5 years. The person I've started dating proactively chased me during this time and I was clear that I wanted to be just friends due to concerns about long-distance, feeling overwhelmed with the interest they had in me without knowing me super well, and feeling like my boundaries weren't being respected. Over those 5 years, we developed a strong friendship/relationship and these issues resolved (except for the long-distance). I had a major life event happen in 2023 that had me questioning how much of my life I had lived in fear and avoidance. Simultaneously, this person was a huge support to me while I went through this difficult moment. I decided I was ready to pursue a romance with him and he agreed he wanted to too. So we started officially dating roughly 10 months ago.
In the beginning of our relationship, he would make tons of comments about our future together, talking about our kids, what life would be like when we're married, trips that we would take, etc. I was hesitant in the beginning to believe this, but slowly started to imagine this future too and would join in these conversations. I had never dated someone who so openly talked about a future with me and while it felt scary in the beginning, I started to feel like it was a beautiful thing and I was experiencing healthy love.
Back in January, he started to talking to me about getting a place in my city. Although we're long distance, he has to come to my city fairly often for business reasons and likes to extend his stays to spend time with me. I initially thought he just meant something for himself that he would stay in when he was in my city. This wasn't super surprising since he has an apartment in another city sitting completely empty and he was talking about getting a place in another city for when he'd visit before we started dating. To be clear, he has vast financial resources. Like hundreds of millions.
I was excited that he was going to get a place in my city, because I knew it would make him more comfortable when he'd visit and therefore make his visits more likely. However, he clarified to me a week later that he actually wanted to get a place for the both of us - where I would stay full time and he would stay when he was visiting. He was surprised that I thought this would just be his place. I thought about it and got excited at the idea (although I had some concerns about living alone for those periods he wasn't there - I've always had roommates and have loved it honestly).
Once I agreed, he said he wanted to start looking at places when he was visiting my city for a few weeks that February. I started to look at places online and have conversations with him about what we'd both want. February came, he didn't make any effort or mention of seeing places in person. My roommates started to ask me if I'd be renewing the lease with them or not and I told them I wasn't sure. I'd periodically bring it up to him and emphasize that we probably need to start looking and make serious progress on it. He would agree, but I wouldn't hear anything more about it. Finally, I told him I needed to give my roommates a final answer about it. He said that I should renew the lease with them so that we're not rushed into finding something and can find the perfect place. He said it was okay if the leases overlapped, assuring me that it wouldn't be a problem and he'd cover it financially. I was hesitant, but given his vast wealth, I figured this was just one of those rich people things where comfort is prioritized over wastefulness.
He has not brought it up since. Recently, I had felt some distance from him. He wasn't as communicative. He flaked on a vacation we were supposed to go on during my spring break at the last minute due to a conference he wanted to attend. He was vague about when he would be able to visit next, saying that I could visit him whenever even though he knew I was in school until May. He invited me to go to a friend's wedding in a far away state in late April, but said he figured I wouldn't be able to go because he knew I had finals. I decided to make it work by flying in for 48 hours despite having finals. While we were together in person, it didn't seem like anything was wrong at all. I decided to talk to him about some of these concerns and mentioned the apartment. He said that he wanted to find the perfect place for us and not stress about it. I told him that I get that, but we need to take action in order to find the perfect place. He said that there's no rush. I pointed out he said he wanted to start looking at places in February, so it seemed like he wanted to get a place fairly soon, but I was feeling confused because since those early talks, I've been the only one to talk to him about it. I told him that it felt like he didn't want to get a place with me anymore. He said that he does want to still but when he brought it up to me, he meant he wanted to get a place in the future and there's no timeline. In his head, it will happen eventually and I shouldn't be worried (????? WTF). Anyways, I decided to drop it and give him the benefit of the doubt.
He also early on told me how excited he was for when we go to his home country, how we'll go in the next year, how he needs to take me there. A week or two ago, an opportunity came up where he would be in a nearby country for business and I would be on a break from school. We talked about me going with him and then going to his home country after for a bit. Yesterday, I asked him about it and he started to express doubts, saying he's never taken a girl home before... Keep in mind: 1) I have already met his parents and brothers more than once. 2) This man has only dated one other person, and it was in high school. 3) This man has been talking about taking me there as soon as its convenient since we started dating.
I'm worried given my past with parental narcissistic abuse that I'm not able to see clearly whether I'm experiencing it or not in my relationship. Prior to this relationship, I always pursued men that were emotionally distant and whose love I had to earn because it felt safer (and mirrored my relationship with my absent parent). This is the first time I've dated someone who consistently showed interest in me. I thought this was healthier and that I was recalibrating my dating patterns, but now I'm starting to have doubts. I'm feeling like I can't trust his word anymore. I'm starting to wonder if he's been future faking me. What do you guys think? Any tips on what I should be looking out for in the future?

I got in my 35XX-H last week and I've been messing around with it, so I just wanted to leave my quick impressions here and why I don't personally like the 35XX-H more then the MM+.
The Good

• Ergonomically the 35XX-H is just better. The buttons are in a much more comfortable position, the shoulder buttons are also more reachable for me.
  
• I personally think the build is better. It feels more solid in my hand, with plastic that feels higher quality, not as much things feel loose. Genuinely a solid device.
  
• The overall hardware features are also just better. Dual SD card slots, dual USB ports (though only one for charging?) HDMI out, thumb sticks with click inputs, it's more powerful, stero speakers, faster SOC, the overall hardware package is better.
  
• Basically in every physical metric except one (I'll get to that) I think the 35XX is better. It feels like a more premium device.
  
• Moonlight streaming support, GPU for filters and higher end consoles, all are great additions as well. One of the reasons I got this device was to try moonlight and it doesn't have any stutters or hitches with that. As well, dreamcast and N64 seem to work well with the games I want to play, such as sonic adventure or mario 64. A huge improvement over the MM+ that can sometimes lag in games like earthbound lol.
  

The Bad

• The software is garbage on the 35XX-H and I hate every second of using it. It's far slower to boot up even the stock OS then my MM+ with Onion, while also being far slower to get back to my games then Onion, and the stock OS is just worse in basically every single way compared to Onion. I know Onion is a high bar, but watching all the reviews on the 35XX-H and hearing how stock is usable until better custom options come out, I'm going to strongly disagree. It has a bunch of fluff in it like 2 different menus for games that aren't explained, it somehow feels slow to use when inputting things like IP addresses for moonlight, it looks ugly, I get glitches when trying to access retroarch menus sometimes but not others, volume doesn't appear to want to change but only sometimes. It's also missing or using far worse versions of key features like Onions quick resume, which kinda works on the 35XX-H but it's just bad in my experience. I genuinely have no idea why anyone has given the stock OS any positive impressions at all. Maybe I'm expecting too much but I really don't think so.
  
• There's a lot of great CFW's out there that fix a lot of these issues, but for me, they all have some slight or serious trade offs that I don't really want to make either. muOS is the one I'd be most interested in but I'm not a huge fan of its interface and it's still missing some things I want like moonlight support. Batocera/Knulli somehow has a longer startup time then stock, and doesn't have a great way to quickly get back into things. Stock mod still has a lot of the problems I have with normal Stock. But CFW's will hopefully get better over time.
  
• The buttons on the 35XX-H are terrible. Quality wise they have almost no wobble, the plastics are great, all of that is fine, but they feel like shit to press. They're some of the stiffest, most uncomfortable buttons I've not only used in a handheld, but in any controller. And for reference on that, I've used nearly every single Nintendo handheld, nearly every single Nintendo console, every playstation, and every xbox controller, along with third party options from 8bitdo, a steam deck, etc. The 35XX-H buttons are the first ones that I genuinely didn't want to use.
  

Conclusion
I now know why so many people still hype up the MM+ even though devices like the 35XX Plus or H are almost objectively better on paper. While I think anbernic is very close to perfection with these despite my list of complaints, the software experience legitimately drags it down so far compared to a Miyoo with Onion that I'm not even sure I could recommend Anbernic devices like this until it's addressed. That and the buttons are the two main drawbacks for me.
2 problems that honestly shouldn't be hard to fix, and could perhaps be addressed with mods in the future like better CFW support, or custom membranes for buttons.
I genuinely want to play n64 and dreamcast games on a handheld, sonic adventure 2 works great on the 35XX-H for me, and moonlight worked far better then I thought it would, but I'll happily trade that off just to use Onion OS.
Maybe in 6 months when the CFW's have matured a lot I'll reconsider the 35XX-H again.

Like if I send in a clip of intentional TKs, will that get them banned? Is there a community guideline that players have to adhere to?
Hoping a CM can confirm because these fucks will ruin the game. I have been grenade killed in base once already, and another guy tried to but I saw him and moved in time. He told me to "stop being AFK and play the game" while I was doing inventory stuff.
Another guy killed me and my friend while we were stuck in the map trying to figure out how to save our gear. He took all our shit and task manager'd out.
Another time, two guys on our team landed right before our exfil came in, and they turned around and shot at us as we were getting on the bird.
Im actually scared to run into players of my own faction. I never know if they're just gonna TK me and steal my shit. It would make me feel a lot better if I knew that I can get these guys banned if they do that shit.
I love love love the community aspect, but we need strong tools to get rid of toxic fucks, and it should be known generally that you will get banned for doing that shit.
I also have a question about the reporting system: how do you differentiate between people reporting for truly accidental TKs, and intentional ones. Also, if a teammate attacks me and I kill him first to defend myself, then they report me, how is that accounted for?

Don't get me wrong. Pay is great, work is steady depending on where you work in the facilities, breaks are nice (again depending where you work, i hear horror stories from the cashiers), and generally? not a terrible vibe on third shift which is a god-send from the normal rabble.
What makes the job awful, much like any location, is the management. We've got several managers, much like any store, and of course they have their "favorites" who get away with everything barring murder. Some that walk around doing nothing all day, some that just sit in the wrong departments chatting, leaving the customers without help, some that ignore the customers asking for assistance as a whole, even a few that due the famous "U-turn" where they go back and forth from the bathroom and breakroom all night before clocking out. Everything we say about these individuals; in one ear, out the other. whether it's to HR, CXM, mod, directly to the individual in question or the boss of the store. Due to the crazy loops and mountain of paper-trailing required, the damage is already heavily implemented before anything can be freaking done about them, making the job twenty times harder than it needs to be.
Then you got the workers who bust their butt to make ends meet getting treated worse than the dirt you stand on because of these headaches. This goes on for every shift, but i need to focus on my own experiences through the third shift stress and tension as it has been getting extremely volatile. Between the problems above and a hard-headed manager interested in rushing to complete tasks over the safety of the worker, and the lack of stable workers since only 3 of us are full time + 2 part timers who do, essentially, full time hours, the strain on the night crew is insane. What sent me over the edge though wasn't the work.. oh no. I can handle the work load because whatever we don't get done is still there the next night. It's not hard to pick up where we left off and by the end of the week 99% of the time everything is done.
Below in the spoiler will be a pretty hefty rant of my experience involving what finally made me register my hard work means nothing. That we're simply replaceable fodder, and that our safety, no matter how much they plaster it as their priority, means nothing.

Back in January the area i live in experienced a pretty big storm. Didn't think much of it at the time, i've ridden my E-bike (my only source of transport) in storms before, even in the snow! But, unlike usual this storm had caused flash flooding. I had reached a particular point in the ride where I couldn't progress. The roads that legally allowed my bike to travel out of where I live had become flooded by nearly 6 inches of high speed water, with spots going as deep as a foot and more due to road conditions. Roads surrounding my route were also being slowly closed off as the storm continued and ubers were cancelling in the area (or outright rejecting rides due to the dangerous conditions.), making it progressively harder to get around. It was 10 minutes til work, and i still had 20 minutes to ride, and a 15 minute ride back home if something went wrong.
I pulled over at this intersection that was flooded and checked the news for the area. Local news networks labeled it a "local emergency", so i called it in, told my boss at night i wouldn't be able to make it due to the unsafe driving conditions and progressively worsening weather closing down major roads. He 'understood', told me it would not effect my points as it was a weather situation, and that several others were calling for similar problems. I returned home now soaked and the bike had to be carefully serviced to avoid any lasting damage from the heavy storm. Not a huge issue but annoying none the less.
Fast forward two weeks and i get brought into the office where the CXM and my boss are... and asked the famous line. "Do you know why you're back here?"
I truly had no idea, so i joked it off, I had won a recent raffle for 3 board-games, so I made the comment it was because I hadn't brought those home yet.
The CXM smiled, then said it was because i had received my 4th point for calling out without sick time. Now, mind you, I have no idea what's going on at this point. I knew i had missed 3 days (once in September, 2 times in october from bike issues leaving me on the road without a way in due to the battery dying.). So i asked where this 4th point was coming from. He mentions the day of the flood, my boss, who is keeping his mouth shut, looks away from me when he says this. At this point I sit down, rather miffed at this point because i was assured that it was okay due to it being a safety concern, and that others were calling out with similar issues without a problem.
I'm stunned at this point. Taking a seat at the wall, the night assistant manager closes the door behind me and the cxm begins to lay into me the normal spiel, about how they expect all workers to be punctual and that this was a writeup, and how i "needed to understand what was being said". The whole time he's smiling, I wasn't. I told him what I was told on the phone, that I was cleared due to the weather conditions and that a point wasn't on my record the last time i checked (which i was checking regularly the first week because i truly expected something like this to happen, and stopped checking 4 days prior to the meeting. This happened 2 weeks later on a Wednesday.) -The cxm says it doesn't matter what i'm told on the phone. And that I should have called an uber. -I told him that ubers were cancelling rides due to the roads closing. -He tells me to order a taxi instead then. Now. I'm getting riled up at this point. My leg it tapping, i'm clearly not happy, and the way the cxm is talking to me is actively pushing for a response like this as he continues to smile and REPEATS "do you understand why you're getting this write-up" over, and over, and over again. -The night shift boss is still not making eye contact with me. -So, I stare straight at the cxm and respond to his question. "I understand that I have 3 points, but the 4th point I do not agree with. I was told that I was okay, and that the local news had declared it an emergency. I do not agree with that fourth point." -They both look at me, and I continue to look directly at the cxm. I'm still pretty relaxed at this point even if i'm agitated mentally and tapping my foot. I just want to get back to work at this point because I know the cxm is on a power-trip based on his body language and how much he's smiling. However, it really shown when that smile went away at me saying that comment. The cxm folded his hands, his smile gone and said "look, you want me to be blunt? I don't care what you agree with, you just need to understand you're being written up for 4 points of missed work. I can't let you leave until you agree."
THAT shifted my whole mood. I went from calm, to alert. My foot stopped tapping, I sat back in the chair and I was glaring at the cxm at this point. I was LIVID. The night manager STILL wouldn't look at me, instead he was watching the cxm. So i stayed focused on him as well. I folded my arms, and gave my full attention to him.
He repeated "Do you understand why you're being given this formal write-up?" again, and I, again, said I didn't agree with it. He AGAIN said he didn't care what I agreed or thought was right. and he just needed me to agree with it. So. I said what he wanted me to say. "I understand i'm being written up for a point I don't agree with"
As if MOCKING me, he again repeats "do you understand you can't keep missing days like this?"
I stayed DEAD SILENT at this point, and he leaned forward and looked at me with a big ol' smile. and told me to "stop staring at me with that death-glare, it's not working on me, buddy"
I was fuming. I was NOT going to be treated like a tool like that for taking my own safety into consideration during a local emergency for the job to tell me I was still in the wrong TWO WEEKS AFTER the event happened.
I was forced to agree, because I was sick and tired of staring at him and getting nowhere. So i repeated the comment like a good little drone and left. God i wish i knew i could have commented in that signing page that i signed under protest, course I was so pissed off i doubt i'd have even realized where to write it if i had known. I signed the "admission of guilt" crap, and immediately went to speak to the main boss of the store. Took two more weeks to get ahold of him, and he agreed it sounded very unusual. Main boss went to HR with clarification on how to handle it because even he wasn't too sure on it.
Two weeks after that, i touched base with the main boss. AND HE AGREED THAT I HAD NOT DESERVED THAT POINT OR THE WRITEUP. HR had come back to him about it coming down to the manager who handles the call-out (in my case the night shift boss), and a second manager who confirms the callout. My only assumption is that my boss agreed and acknowledged it as a weather related incident, and the second manager, the cxm in this case, decided to over-rule that decision.
Every other manager I spoke to thought that point was bogus. THE MAIN BOSS said it was bogus, and HR agreed that it was a case-to-case issue due to their system not having anything concrete for localized weather emergencies (they only have it for snow/ice, and state emergencies.) but even our HR contact agreed that safety takes priority! So here I am, 3 months into this crap I didn't even deserve, all because this dude decided to swing his big-boy stick. Taking the proper channels to have it addressed, complaint sent in about the manager in question, and trying to do things by the book did nothing but hit me with a "well you didn't act fast enough so we can't fix it" response, because it took over a month to get it processed. On the plus side, since I explained the entire incident to the main boss of the store (including the response from the manager who was handling the write-up), He gave me his direct line and told me that if i EVER got caught in a major storm like that to let him know, and he'd be sure to clear the incident himself. So while it happened, the store boss pulled through and assured me it won't happen again since it was a situational decision based on whoever got the call-out to handle. The problem is that the one who made this a problem in the first place is still in a position to do said problem. And that, unfortunately, I am unable to address directly like this. It was untouched for almost 2 weeks, sent in as a point right at the end of the 2 week "edit" period, and then I'm written up a week after that, ensuring I had no way to fight it. This was, in all purposes, an abuse of power. But, i'm a drone. I'm only as strong as the voice of the rest of this cacophony, and that's why they keep everyone at eachothers' throats.

Like I said. It's a rant, so only pop it open if you want to see what triggered this message to begin with. It's the biggest frustration I've had in the many years working here that firmly got under my skin due to the way it was handled and how long it took to get properly addressed, for no other reason than to tell me it was too late to do anything about it. We're just numbers in this machine, readily replaceable and easily used to kick around in the name of "fun" for those in a position of power. Where the rules and regulations are waived so long as you're buddies with the other management, and those working hard and keeping to themselves are an easy source to dump the blame and pressure or exercise someone's "authority".