Goodbye party invitation to college

Reflecting on 2021, truly marked the zenith of my young career. The pandemic was coming to an end, I was fresh from the hallowed halls of a prestigious but unheralded college, thrust into the corporate labyrinth where, as a mere sidekick to the big shots, I contributed to a deal of record-breaking magnitude. My modest corporate minion life was exaggerated into legend by my professors during an alumni reunion, leading to a rather embarrassing episode where I was paraded around as the poster child of their education career’s success. My parents, not ones to shy away from a bit of pomp, lauded my achievements to anyone within earshot.
But as 2022 unfurled its chaos with the epidemic, my professional life spiralled downwards as swiftly as it had risen. I was laid off, and replaced by a nepotistic hire—my boss's new mistress's nephew. During my dismal final days, my colleagues, once comrades became corporate sharks, whispers of them scheming to claim my last efforts as their own filled the empty office spaces.
Compelled by financial duress to abandon my central city dwelling, I relocated to the outskirts with two college mates, Jaz and Kath, who had similarly found themselves victims of the economic downturn. We settled into apartment 606, a unit with dubious charm, suspiciously affordable on the 13th floor of a dreary building, its corridor haunted by a flickering sensor light that was only designed to function on rare occasions. Yet, the apartment itself was surprisingly very well furnished, almost like something that jumped out from a design mag, out beating sample rooms in Ikea, boasting a spacious balcony, a living room ready for an impromptu soirée, a dining table that’s good enough to hold a banquet(became our co-working space) and a kitchen isle that became our sanctuary and curse.
When we first settled into our new abode, we discovered a trove of fine kitchen utensils, perfect for whipping up sophisticated cuisine and crafting cocktails worthy of a swanky soirée. Tucked away in the fridge, among the remnants of the previous tenants' life, was a quaint note: “The three of us really enjoyed our stay here, especially our meals and nights spent by the kitchen island. We hope you find as much joy in it as we did. Use it well.” With a casual flick of my wrist, I dismissed the note into the garbage can, oblivious to the depth of its seemingly innocuous message. Little did I know, that piece of paper was more a passing of the torch than a simple goodbye.
Our initial days in apartment 606 brimmed with camaraderie and impromptu celebrations: movie nights sprawled on the living room sofas, barbeque dinners under the stars on our balcony, and co-working sessions at the dining table, peppered with resume tweaks and contemplative conversations over cocktails. We even scored a second-hand karaoke machine, allowing me to channel my inner diva—a throwback to my musical theatre days in college and my stint as the voice of corporate presentations and negotiations at my previous job, where I was known for my resonant yet finely tuned voice.
Yet, as the months wore on and the job market remained unyielding, our early merriment slowly surrendered to a creeping anxiety. The kitchen island, once the heart of our home where laughter and shared meals flowed freely, gradually morphed into the epicenter of our collective unease, bearing silent witness to the quiet desperation settling over us.
One evening, in the suspiciously affordable yet stylish apartment, I sank into the sofa, my spirits dampened by my favorite team's disheartening loss. The mood was grim, mirroring my fears of my beloved player's potential retirement at season's end. Later, as we congregated around the kitchen island for dinner, I transformed into an impromptu sports commentator, passionately preaching about the game’s disappointing details that led to failure and my favorite player’s fine qualities. Meanwhile, Jaz updated us on a friend's melodramatic breakup, with guesses that something ugly must have happened behind the scenes. Kath, ever the culinary enthusiast, not only served up her delicious pasta but also dished out the latest celebrity gossip, each tidbit as spicy as her sauce.
The next day, during a late breakfast at the same kitchen island—our unwitting oracle—we were hit by a triple whammy of reality checks. The news of my favorite player's retirement broke, echoing my gloomy predictions from the night before. Jaz chimed in with an update that our friend had uncovered a cheating scandal worthy of its own reality TV special. And Kath, never one to be left out of the drama: her favorite celebrity was now the star of a scandal.
By the third morning, as we sipped our coffee, the newspaper slapped me with another bizarre twist. I was going through the devastating economics and politics sections, then I saw the sports section——featured an irate coach, hell-bent on convincing my favorite player to dismiss retirement plans and keep his jersey on a little longer. Meanwhile, Jaz had good news for a change: it turned out our friend's love story might have a second act after all, as misunderstandings were being cleared up. Amidst these revelations, Kath, who had been grumbling about the nearby supermarket’s inability to stock anything remotely gourmet, and hadn’t had a taste of her favorite Blue Mountain coffee since the beginning of that year, triumphantly found a can of Blue Mountain coffee, and it was on sale and therefore affordable—proof that miracles happen, and sometimes they even go on discount.
As I sat there, absorbing the serendipity of our discussions manifesting into real-world events, I couldn't help but marvel at the mysterious knack of our kitchen island. Was it merely a coincidence, or had this stylish piece of decor become the unlikely conductor of our lives symphony? One thing was certain: life in apartment 606 was never dull, and our kitchen island seemed to be more than just a place to eat—it was a place where, apparently, you could stir the pot of fate.
I decided to conduct a whimsical experiment with our now seemingly magical kitchen island. Clearing my throat theatrically, I declared, "I should be interviewed for a director position." To my sheer astonishment, the next day a headhunter rang me up, claiming I was the ideal candidate for a directorial role at a prestigious corporation in my field. Despite the other candidates possessing decades more experience which defeated me with no effort, and my own lingering self-doubt from months of unemployment, I sailed to the final interview round with the company's executives.
Upon returning to our apartment, I found Kath flaunting a chic dress from a designer brand brand she’d snagged on clearance—a little luxury courtesy of our wish-granting island. Inspired, I approached the island and cheekily requested, "Get us jobs. Something fun." Lo and behold, the following day was spent lounging and binge-watching Netflix, only to be interrupted by a call from a former bigwig at my old job. He was venturing into a more illustrious company and wanted me onboard. The informal chat that followed was a breeze, and just like that, I was back in the game with a fancier title and a fatter paycheck.
The subsequent week was a flurry of celebrations. Jaz secured a senior-level position, and Kath landed her dream job at an influencer management agency. Feeling triumphant, we decided to indulge in a night of fine dining—our first in months. That Friday evening when I went from office to restaurant, on a whim, stopped at a convenience store to grab snacks and cigarettes for our post-dinner revelry. Outside, I encountered a homeless person. After offering him a sandwich (which he traded for a cigarette instead), he took a drag, peered into my eyes, and ominously muttered, “Look, young lady, this isn’t my business, but be wary of what you wish for; everything comes with a price. Good luck and god bless you.”
His words barely registered until later that evening when a mishap occurred that seemed to underline his warning. As we enjoyed syphon coffee post-dinner, a barista accidentally tripped over Kath’s flowing dress. The resulting spill left her with first-degree burns, abruptly ending our night as we rushed to the emergency room. Though it was "just" a first-degree burn, the pain was significant enough to require several days off for Kath’s recovery. Amid the drama, I couldn't help but wonder about the cryptic caution from the man outside the store—had our fortunate streak come with a hidden cost?
We chalked up the coffee calamity to bad luck. The next month flowed smoothly: Kath's fingers healed, she returned to work, and I quickly found my groove at the new job. With all of us gainfully employed, our communal meals at the kitchen island became rare. My mornings were a whirlwind of grabbing breakfast and coffee on the go, followed by an hour's commute to a job that had me scarfing down instant noodles by nightfall, just in time for a quick shower.
As the busy season kicked in, my workload ballooned—not just from the seasonal uptick, but because I was hell-bent on proving my mettle. I quickly outshone most of my peers, and my employer, recognizing a budding overachiever, piled on major tasks, which I eagerly accepted. What started as the occasional hour of overtime soon devoured my weekends. Unpaid overtime, as the fine print in my contract gleefully noted, became my new norm. Driven by a mix of ambition and expectation, I had become the go-to young hotshot, the erstwhile record-breaker now expected to continually outdo myself.
Mentally, I was too swamped to entertain thoughts of anything beyond work, which, in a twisted way, felt like a break. Physically, however, the strain began to show. A bout of flu caught on a business trip escalated into a fever. Sick as I was, deadlines waited for no one, and I soldiered on medicated and miserable. By the time I made it home, my voice had abandoned me. Unable to utter a word the next morning, I resorted to emailing my manager about my sorry state.
That week, robbed of my voice, I mused that it was perhaps a well-deserved hiatus for my overworked vocal cords—a silent retreat if you will. But when my voice did return, it was as a raspy whisper, a shadow of its former crisp and melodious timbre. My doctor offered a grim prognosis: slight improvement might come, but the golden tones were gone for good—scarred by the relentless grind. Ah, the price of ambition—a scratchy throat as a permanent reminder of my corporate conquests.
It seemed I had unwittingly exchanged the clarity of my voice for the tumult of career success. In the midst of our domestic enchantment with the possibly mystical kitchen island, Kath unearthed the contact of a reputed psychic, hailed as the finest in the land. However, the consultation fee was nothing short of princely, and with Jaz vehemently dismissing anything that couldn't be explained by cold, hard science, she promptly opted out of splitting the bill. Kath and I, unwilling to drain our wallets on what could be mere phantasmagoria, reluctantly let the opportunity pass.
Meanwhile, I couldn’t help but notice a curious change in Jaz’s routine. She had ceased dining at the kitchen island, avoiding it as if it were cursed—or perhaps, in her view, simply out of style. The Saturday morning brought a particularly harsh twist: a murder of crows took to spiralling above our balcony, their cries as sharp as the plot of a Poe novel. We found ourselves drawn to the infamous kitchen island, lined up like the cast of a macabre play, silently praying for the birds to disperse. Kath, ever trying to restore some semblance of normalcy, offered up cups of Blue Mountain coffee. She absentmindedly inquired if I wanted cream or sugar in mine—a blunder that made me realize just how long it had been since our last coffee klatch at this very spot. My inner monologue couldn't resist a dark wish for the crows to scatter, perhaps too dark, for they began to dive bomb our balcony in a feathery kamikaze. The spectacle was enough to knock Jaz off her feet—literally—as her mug met its end on the floor. Kath, meanwhile, made a hasty retreat to worship the porcelain god, and I sat frozen, my brain offline, pondering the twisted power of our kitchen island's apparent wish-granting.
After the unnerving spectacle of crows turning our balcony into a scene straight out of a Hitchcock film, our first rational step—post-collective fainting, of course—was to summon cleaners to manage the feathery carnage. Then, still rattled but increasingly curious, we visited a psychic, who, contrary to the crystal-ball-gazer image, operated out of a posh boutique in a high-end mall and dressed more like she was headed to a fashion show than a séance. We laid bare our saga of the seemingly cursed kitchen island, complete with photographic evidence of where domestic bliss meets eerie phenomena.
The psychic introduced a term that chilled the air around us: “limbo,” the threshold between our world and the otherworldly, and she dubbed our kitchen island the "Devil’s Bargain Counter." According to her, our wishes came with a heavy and unpredictable price, because we have accidentally started trades with beings from the netherworld. Her advice was disarmingly simple: cease all trades on the island. To address the repercussions of past wishes, she advised us the first line of defence, which was an eclectic mix of offerings laid out on our cursed countertop: raw meat(rooster works the best), a cocktail of spices(coca and cinnamon preferably), liberal splashes of spirits(whiskey and rum ideally), and an eerie bouquet of black flowers(luckily I found some black roses at a flower shop of the mall). In a grander gesture of appeasement, Kath relinquished her shiny new diamond bracelet, Jaz her absurdly expensive headphones, and I parted with cash—— a hefty slice of my bonus in hopes of placating whatever capricious spirits we'd angered.
Our return to normalcy was brief but sweet, prompting us to plan a getaway, eager to forget about our nefarious kitchen island. Yet, the respite was merely a tease. Jaz, in a stroke of spectacular misfortune, narrowly dodged disaster twice in one day—first nearly becoming subway track fodder on her way back after work, and then almost getting knocked out by a rogue plant at our apartment building’s doorstep. Clearly, our previous offerings were mere appetizers to whatever forces we'd stirred. The psychic, summoned once again to our now-dubious sanctuary, decreed that the spirits had developed rather expensive tastes, unsatisfied by our initial gestures.
In a desperate bid for closure, we had the psychic over for a nighttime ritual, timed perfectly with Earth's closest approach to the netherworld, according to her. Our living room turned into a ritual chamber, with windows blacked out for days, to keep the otherworldly dealings strictly nocturnal. That night, we arranged ourselves around the island, now less a kitchen fixture and more an altar of last resort.
The psychic, amidst a chorus of Latin incantations, directed us through a chilling séance that included a mirror that reflected nothing but darkness and a burning black candle, the three of us sat in a row, joined hands, eyes closed. When the black candle was flickering at its last, the first eerie scratches heard prompted our eyes to open prematurely, we saw a command appear on the island, written by invisible hand and pen, in blood-red script, urging us to find the next "succeeder" before our lease on otherworldly disturbances could be terminated.
With bated breath, we agreed, and as if by magic, our signatures materialized on the countertop, then faded as the candle sputtered out. We tore off the black cardboard taped on the windows at dawn, the sunrise revealed a final message etched into the surface: "Debt cleared." As the daylight grew, the ominous inscription dissolved into nothingness, signalling the end of our spectral saga.
The ordeal, now officially behind us, left us enjoying a semblance of normalcy: life in 606 returned to its mundane rhythm, with dinners and movie nights back on our social calendar. Though not without its scars—literal and figurative.
It’s been two years since then, Jaz, in the throes of romantic bliss, is now gearing up for a new chapter waiting to be written alongside her soon-to-be spouse; Kath, her career finally taking a lucrative turn, was poised to upgrade her living situation, she secured a lease on a lavish serviced apartment in the city center—a place that matched her newfound financial swagger.
I’m not without my own leaps forward. With a modest boost from my parents, I took the plunge into homeownership, snagging a property within the city’s vibrant confines. The process was a whirlwind of paperwork and decorating decisions, culminating in a space I could truly call my own.
As we are packing up now, my last act is to type out our story, at the infamous island, and of course, I left a note in the fridge for the next tenants:
"Welcome to 606. We had a wonderful time here, especially at the kitchen island, filled with joy and unforgettable moments. We hope you find as much happiness as we did. Use the isle well. Warm wishes, the previous tenants."

Before i begin I’d like to say that the history between the drama is very deeply rooted so the things i talk about have a lot of backstory to them.
Essentially, my best friend of 8 years is turning 18 so I offered to throw her a party since she explained her family was not going to celebrate her this year. I asked her to send me a list of people she wants me to invite and she asked me what the limit was. I said around 20 people because the budget is a little short. She eventually told me she’d send it but warned me that the she’d be inviting all my opps.
The people she’s talking about inviting are all people who have done me pretty dirty. One of them is my ex best friend who had spread a terrible rumor about me last year (one that includes awful allegations) and then proceeded to ice me out of her life. She turned everyone against me but we eventually talked things out and sort of made up? I decided to keep her out of my life though because i was pretty hurt.
The next person is my ex partner who dumped me and then lead me on for a while afterwards. He played with me a lot and was talking to other people during that time. He also recently was getting with the ex best friend (from the paragraph above) but he’s just someone who i also don’t want in my life anymore. It’s been 2 years since we broke up and I’ve been in a new healthy relationship for half a year now so that part doesn’t matter AS much to me but it’s still awkward. I should note though that his best friend is family friends with my best friend so if he goes they both go and that’s why he’s invited.
The third person is a girl who we all shared a friend group with. We were pretty close but she randomly cut me off one day and has given me the cold shoulder since.
Now my issue is more with the fact that my best friend has claimed to be super loyal to me and she has even stood up for me to these people. But she’s also talked her fair share of shit about them all and said some nasty things so it feels fake to me that she’s still buddy buddy with them even after she claims to be loyal to me.
As the person throwing the birthday party i think it would be selfish of me to say I don’t want to go or even try to make her feel bad about inviting them because at the end of the day, it is her special day. However I don’t feel comfortable around these people, in fact they make me so mad because use of what they’ve done to make my life miserable and I’ve worked so hard to move past it. Am I the asshole for not wanting to do the birthday party/ not wanting to go?

I tried to host today a car meet in Forza Horizon 5. Anyways I enter the game, teleport to the Horizon Apex outpost where the meet was supposed to start. I begin to invite the people that confirmed they were going to attend.
This is where problems begin.
I tried to make a Xbox Party, as promised, and "something went wrong" showed up. Yay. No problem, I can just invite them via a convoy. I do so and only like 3 guys showed up, so I begin messaging the rest of the people to see if they still were going to attend. But Game Bar said "no" and refused to send the message. Heck I tried to send it again and it literally decided to crash.
And before anyone says "It'S yOuR pC" or "It'S yOuR iNtErNet", then explain how I was running a heavy game in ONLINE mode with no issues.
I gave up on that shit and just cancelled the whole meet. Can't Microsoft create working software or what?

My friend and I are college freshmen (both f19). Last semester, my friend Ashley and I were close, but this semester, it feels like she ghosted me for another friend, Riley.
I was upset by this, but I didn't feel like I should say anything because Ashley was going to hang out with who she wanted, and if that's not me, then whatever. She also seemed distant and could get rude at times, but I justified that it was her depression and the stress she was going through with her classes.
A couple of days ago, Ashley, Riley, and I went to get stuff for another friend's birthday party. Ashley and Riley talked the entire way there, and I didn't really say much. At this point, I was used to it. I'm a quiet person, and they talk so much and so quickly that I don't get the chance to add to the conversation.
After getting what we needed, Riley headed off to study, so Ashley and I walked over to the dorms together. I tried to talk with her, but again, she was distant and didn't give me a whole lot of responses that would continue the conversation, so we were quiet. Then, all of a sudden, Ashley walks ahead of me and puts on headphones, which I think I can fairly say is quite rude. It also made me wonder if the distancing was because of something I did.
I wanted to talk it over then, but we were all gonna be hanging out at this friend's party. I didn't wanna ruin the mood and punish my other friends for shit they're not a part of, so I didn't say anything. Ashley also moved out the next morning, so I didn't have an opportunity to talk it out with her because she was leaving when I woke up. I felt shitty for texting her about how the whole ditching me shit was rude, but I didn't exactly have a choice. I also asked if there was something I did.
Anyway, she texted back, saying that something I said had upset her very early in the semester. I remember regretting the thing I said, but I didn't know it was something that would affect her to the point of being closed off and rude. I apologized after learning how much it had upset her, but I also let her know that this was something that should have been communicated to me if it was upsetting enough to push me away. This is what I'm mainly upset about.
I also let it slip that when we were debating housing next year as a group, I was hurt by things said. Long story short, she said something that I really should have talked to her about, but I felt like the group was against me and I didn't wanna be pushed away even further.
Now she's upset and "shocked" that I didn't communicate about this in person "like adults" and squarely put the blame on me, but I think both of us poorly communicated. It also feels like the text conversation is one-sided; I'm trying to own up to the things she's saying hurt her, but all I'm getting is more blame and more reasons I'm wrong.
I'm just thinking about all of this, and I'm worried I overreacted and am actually in the wrong. AITA?

My friend from high school missed by undergraduate graduation and graduation because she dropped out.
I (23 F) have been friends with this woman (23 F lets call her BEBE) since my freshmen year of high school. After high school, we still remained good friends and really we became closer after graduating hs. We ended up going to different universities, BEBE decided to go to a private university out of state and I decided to stay in state for college. BEBE dropped out of school during the second semester of freshman after struggling academically, and financially to keep up with tuition, and as a result, she began to struggle mentally. During BEBE's time out of school, she went to a community college on and off due to not being able to keep her grades up and she lost scholarships because her grades were too low so she had to work to pay for community college (she still stays at home and her mom was not helping her pay for school anymore since she was still paying off the loan from the university). Our friend group suggested that she take a break from school to get right mentally and financially. We have had multiple conversations about comparing her journey to others and how we are all on our own timeline. Right before my undergraduate graduation BEBE car was repoed and our other friend (lets call her Mia) had a birthday so I know it would have been difficult for her to attend my undergraduate graduation, she also said that it would have been difficult for her mentally to attend because she wasn't graduating. I respected that at the time. I was accepted into a one-year accelerated graduate program. During that one extra year of school, BEBE came down to my school to party multiple times, we took roads trips, and attended family events with each other (every time I would drive back home I tried my best to see her, like EVERYTIME even seeing her over my own best friend sometimes because she stayed closer to my mom's house). As my graduate graduation is approaching I told my friend group that I wouldn't be able to attend Mia's birthday plans this year because I had work, finals, and my graduation was the weekend following her birthday(which was on a Friday) ( honestly I was completely overwhelmed with a lot of things at the time and I was completely transparent about how overwhelmed I was feeling). I had told them multiple times that my graduation was coming up but BEBE and Mia never even acknowledged I said anything about my graduation ( I never gave them details because they never asked and honestly I wasn't expecting them to come because they didn't attend last year). On top of that my car was stolen right before I had to go and take a final exam, THREE days before my graduation, and the day before Mia's birthday this year, I was literally devastated and really just needed my family and friends support. We have a group chat ( Me, BEBE, Mia, and our other friend Sarah). In the group chat, the day of my graduate graduation, Mia was upset with Sarah because she fell asleep on Mia's birthday plans (activity was scheduled for 8 PM but it didn't happen until 11:30 PM), Mind you Sarah stays about 45-60 mins away from the activity and was waiting for them to tell her to leave out. BEBE follows up with a message saying that it felt like nobody cared about Mia's birthday. So I responded by saying I apologize for not being as enthusiastic about Mia's birthday this year but it was literally because I was overwhelmed which I expressed to them before that day and that I was dealing with my car being stolen (I haven't told them up until this point because I had no time to process this on top of making sure I finish my classes strong and I was still quite upset about it and didn't want to keep thinking about it). They never acknowledged my message... so I sent another text saying how I was upset that they didn't put in any effort to come to either of my graduations. after that BEBE and Mia were saying they felt the friendship was unequal, they were never formally invited, and that they weren't talking to me originally but yet they kept using "yall" and using other plural words instead of messaging Sarah separately or being direct. Mind you this is a couple hours before my graduation and they still didn't even acknowledge that it's my graduation day, didn't get a congratulation or even checked to see if I was okay after having my car stolen and expressing to them I was overwhelmed. Then BEBE and Mia started saying why should they tell me congratulations soo early when they didn't know what time my graduation was and the fact I didn't tell Mia happy birthday until the evening time on her actual birthday ( less not forget my car was stolen the day before and I was also at work trying to make calls to my insurance agent ). I never formally gave them details because they never asked or even acknowledged I said anything about my graduation. Then they went on to say they didn't even have a ride to my graduation but im like yall could've rode with Sarah but then BEBE goes she had to look after her 16 year old twin brothers......... and she wasn't attending no ones graduation because she isn't graduating. Personally I feel that is so selfish!!!!!! like I understand she's not graduating but like I just needed my friends' support during a difficult time. her saying she couldn't celebrate my accomplishments and perseverance because she's not where she wants to be in life is so not fair and it feels like she's in secret competition with me. BEBE states like she still mentally is struggling to deal with graduation season and personally I just feel like I am struggling mentally too and I have been a good friend to her through all her mental break downs so her not showing up for me is her simply being a fake friend, only wanting to party, drink, and smoke but when I needed her just to show up as a friend (and not for her to compare her life to mine) she couldn't and I am so disappointed. She ended up leaving the group chat and I am willing to lose this friendship because I feel I have really show up her on so many different occasions whether it be mentally and even financially. After all of that I just wanted to get a different perspective to see if I should've gave her more grace or no? Thank you for coming to my TED talk and appreciate yall POV!

Hi!
My [28F] best friend [30F] Katie and I met back in college and we became quite close and lived together at about 19/21
She doesn’t drive but when we got closer I started bringing her to work with me to cocktail waitress. I had to change the one I was working at because they denied her and we had to go to one an hour away but it was fine I loved being able to hang with her so often.
After that year she graduated, moved a state away ~ 2/3 hours drive.
When Katie first moved she was pretty lonely so i would visit her frequently, sometimes every single week. I would go there for entire weekends, birthdays, holidays, sometimes to take her to work with me up there, etc.
For example things like she had a brief fling with someone who hurt her so I sent a gift and then visited the next few weekends. When her cat died I did the same with a gift and visited, i rented an Airbnb when her grandfather died so she could grieve with me away from roommates, etc.
She has come to visit me twice and sent a gift once. We of course still talked ~5 days a week if not daily and still do to this day.
2 summers ago she got engaged and for the proposal I was there among one other friend and the rest was 50+ people entirely family that’s how close we are.
Since that summer I had a huge breakup of ~8 year relationship it was pretty rough and ended up in psych ward. I then had surgery, separately spent almost a month in hospital and almost died . I also had a bad car accident, and she forgot my birthday.
She didn’t send a card, visit or anything. She rejected my sisters wedding invite as well, even though I asked her to come since I was still sad about breakup. I finally confronted her at the end of the year saying how hurt I was and asking her to visit because I needed her after the awful year I had and she said she loves me but she’s busy, thatI expect too much and she sent some flowers.
For her wedding, I was gonna be MOH until they decided family only due to how large their families are. (65+ people) I was hurt but alright not my wedding.
Saturday I visited for a bachelorette, me and her siblings split the bill it was great.
Sunday Katie texted me saying thanks for coming and among other stuff I said I was happy to be invited despite no friends being able to be at the wedding.
Then, Katie tells me over text how people dropped out of the wedding so she invited another friend + her husband and then two of the grooms friends. Not me. I have yet to answer her text about that and she’s texted me twice since about random filler nonsense.
I feel like I have put in so much effort and gotten minimal in return. So AITA if I keep ignoring her? AIO? Is this normal and I’m expecting too much?

14-minute read.

average monthly nominal salaries and YoY change in Q1 2024

Yerevan +8% to ֏324K/$836
Syunik +7% to ֏295K/$760
Shirak +7% to ֏142K/$366
Yerevan had the highest wages. Syunik had the highest wages among provinces, while Shirak had the lowest.
REPORT: While the average nominal monthly salary does not always show the level of economic prosperity in a region, its rise has made a tangible difference in Syunik.
SUREN PARSYAN (economist): Syunik has higher wages and strong employment. It is the most prosperous province with the lowest unemployment rate in Armenia: 24% in Armenia, 15% in Yerevan, and 2% in Syunik.
REPORT: Over the last 5 years, the average monthly nominal salaries have risen by 40% while the inflation was 21%.
source,

Armenian army launches command staff exercises

They will exercise the practical implementation of deployment and combat plans, evaluate the commanders' skills, improve the synchronized work between various groups, develop the officers' moral characteristics and practical skills during preparation and combat operations, etc.
They will use automated control systems and modern technologies during the exercises.
source,

Armenia and India will form a new working group for defense cooperation

Defense ministries of AM and IN held a meeting on Tuesday. They discussed the 2024-2025 cooperation plan and the creation of a new working group to coordinate the cooperation.
source,

from PM Pashinyan's speech at Copenhagen Democracy Summit:

PASHINYAN: Democracy has indeed become a reality in Armenia. Before the 2018 Velvet Revolution, massive electoral frauds were the usual companion of elections in Armenia. There was no trust among the citizens that there was a real chance for them to elect the government.
Now the situation is totally different; citizens know that they are powerful enough to decide. The two general elections that were held in Armenia after the Velvet Revolution have been acknowledged as democratic, free, and competitive both by the Armenian society and the international community.
Armenia made huge progress in strengthening the democratic institutions, an achievement reflected in reputable democracy indexes:
(a) Now we are the 43rd in the Reporters Without Borders’ Freedom of Speech index, compared to 79th place in 2017.
(b) Categorized as having partially free internet in 2017 by Freedom House, now we enjoy the status of a country with free internet.
(c) In Transparency International’s Corruption Perception Index, Armenia is now 62nd instead of 107th in 2017.
(d) In the Economist Intelligence Unit’s democracy index we are 84th compared to 111th in 2017.
In order to assess this progress, it's essential to note that alongside democratic reforms, Armenia has been contending with external security challenges: the 44-day war in Nagorno-Karabakh, Azerbaijan's invasion of Armenia in 2021 and 2022 and the occupation of over 200 km² amid inaction by [Russia's] CSTO, the forced displacement of over 100,000 Armenians from Nagorno-Karabakh, have cast doubts among Armenian citizens weather democracy is the right choice. So, democracy needs to prove its efficiency while dealing with security, economic and humanitarian challenges.
We are pleased with the deployment of EU monitoring mission alongside the Armenian-Azerbaijani border, and we welcome EU’s decision to expand its capacity. On the other hand, we hope for the inclusion of Armenia into the European Peace Facility and in this regard, we rely on the support of all EU member states [Hungary].
A new set of commitments aimed at strengthening Armenia’s economic resilience, state institutions, and addressing the humanitarian needs of refugees has been taken on by the European Union and United States during the high-level meeting on April 5 in Brussels. The rapid and effective implementation of those commitments is of utmost importance.
Despite all the challenges, we believe that the real and most aspiring companion for democracy is lasting and sustainable peace. My government took the share of its responsibility for this. Recently we reached an agreement with Azerbaijan to launch the delimitation of our interstate borders on the basis of the Almaty Declaration of 1991. That means that during the delimitation we should simply reproduce the Soviet-era administrative borders. This is the implementation of the agreement reached in Prague in 2022. Now it is time to incorporate and reflect those agreements in the peace treaty and have it signed.
Another key point for our regional stability is the «Crossroads of Peace», project, initiated by my government. This project implies that Armenia and Azerbaijan restore and open transport and other communications in accordance with the sovereignty and jurisdiction of the countries through which they pass, and comply with the principles of equality and reciprocity. These elements of the concept were agreed upon during the July 2023 meeting with Ilham Aliyev and Charles Michel. //

... Politico reporter's Q&A with Pashinyan

REPORTER: [Ex-NATO leader] Anders Fogh Rasmussen called your neighbor an autocracy. You are in a very difficult geopolitical and geographical position. How do you solve the security problem in that environment?
PASHINYAN: I would not like to comment on the internal situation of our neighboring countries. Democracy fully corresponds to the mentality of our people. It is a strategy for our government, it is our political belief, it is also our political identity. The members of our political team have spent most of their lives fighting for democracy, the rule of law, and freedom of speech. Now we have the opportunity to realize all these values in our country.
The security situation was complicated because of the regional and global situation; the world order is collapsing at the moment. My assessment is, and I have had occasion to say this publicly, that the 2020 war was a prelude to further developments. And now the main issue is security.
What is our strategic point of view, how are we going to guarantee the security of our country? Recently, I gave a speech in our parliament, where I said that the most important tool for ensuring security is a foreign policy based on legitimacy. This is the reason why we so often speak about the 1991 Almaty Declaration.
It is very important that during the 2022 Prague meeting, two very important agreements were reached. Armenia and Azerbaijan recognize each other's territorial integrity and sovereignty on the basis of the Almaty Declaration and will use it as the basis for the border demarcation. This is the reason why I said that we are not drawing a new border, we just need to reproduce the existing one on the ground. This process is happening right now, and I hope that we will continue it steadfastly.
REPORTER: The border conflict that has occurred in recent years has had a negative impact on relations with Russia and Russia's role for Armenia. What would you say about this?
PASHINYAN: Armenia is a member of CSTO. We are officially a CSTO member, but I have announced that we have frozen our participation.
REPORTER: So are you still a member or...?
PASHINYAN: It is a matter for further discussion, but it is very important to record the current situation. A crisis arose in our relations after Azerbaijani troops invaded Armenia, and according to CSTO procedures, the Organization and its member states had to support Armenia in this situation. But even after the formal application, the CSTO refused to take any concrete steps, and in fact, that is the main reason for freezing our participation in the CSTO at all levels.
REPORTER: Do you expect the West to occupy the current vacuum and ensure your security?
PASHINYAN: We are diversifying our foreign relations in all spheres. Now we are developing defense cooperation with India, France, and other countries. We have a certain cooperation with the European Union because as I mentioned, we are happy about the deployment of the EU Civilian Observation Mission on the border. It is a civilian mission but in a way, it is a new factor for the security of our region. This is the first time that the European Union participates in the security agenda of Armenia.
REPORTER: Would you like to become an EU member?
PASHINYAN: We are waiting for the EU's decision to include Armenia in the European Peace Facility. We also hope to start visa liberalization negotiations, and last year I announced in the European Parliament that Armenia is ready to be as close to the European Union as the European Union deems it possible. This is our position.
REPORTER: Can you elaborate on what initiatives Armenia is taking in the fight against corruption?
PASHINYAN: We have made huge progress but have not eradicated corruption from Armenia. We must continue to be persistent in the agenda of democratic reforms. This is the reason why cooperation with the European Union is of utmost importance for us because today the European Union is our main partner in the implementation of our democratic reform agenda. We hope that the European Union, as well as the USA, will increase their support to Armenia in the implementation of democratic reforms, because, as I said, democracy is a strategy for us.
By the way, in 2019 we started a Strategic Dialogue with the USA, and today we see the strengthening of our cooperation with the European Union. We recently had a tripartite meeting with the participation of the USA, EU, and Armenia. It was an unprecedented format, where we adopted a huge agenda of institutional and economic reforms. It is also very important that we receive more tangible support from the EU and the US to address the humanitarian needs of the Nagorno Karabakh refugees because it is a very sensitive and emotional issue for us.
REPORTER: In which year would you like Armenia to become a member of the EU?
PASHINYAN: This year [as soon as possible]. //
Pashinyan met Anders Fogh Rasmussen. The latter emphasized the importance of the “Crossroads of Peace” project in the context of unblocking the regional infrastructure.
Pashinyan discussed various topics with the PM of Denmark. The latter accepted his invitation to visit Armenia.
full video, source, video, other, other, source, video,

former regime continues to hold protests and briefly shut down roads in Yerevan with demands for PM Pashinyan's resignation

ԳԼՈՒԽ 1
Dozens of participants were detained and released the same day for blocking roads. The detentions decreased from 170 on Monday to ~63 on Tuesday. They want Pashinyan to resign or to be impeached. The protest organizers visited universities to gather student supporters, some of whom joined them with a dance. The organizers also stopped by at a bakery where they were given free food.
A felony investigation was launched after a police vehicle, "with the sirens on", struck a reporter on the street. In another instance, an investigation was launched against a protester who brought a long sword. One other case was launched over alleged threats made on Facebook by a Galstanyan fan who wants scores of people to be beaten in dalans and exiled from Armenia, "մենակ էտ դեպքում էս սրբազան հողը կմաքրվի էս տեսակ շան ծնունդներից, ուրիշ ձև չկա!!!!"
ԳԼՈՒԽ 2
A ruling faction member of Yerevan City Council complained about "harassment" by opposition figures who are attempting to convince ruling party members to join the protests and the impeachment.
RULING MEMBER: That is not how it works. No one will join you with that conduct. People will join if they see you have a legitimate agenda with trustworthy leaders. Instead, you are "ethnically cleansing" the citizens of Armenia [referring to one opposition speaker telling non-Armenians to leave] և հեռու չէ են օրը երբ դուք գուցե ասեք որ հայ լինելու համար պետք է Հայկ նահապետից տեղեկանք բերել: //
ԳԼՈՒԽ 3
Yesterday the protest co-organizer Archbishop Bagrat Galstanyan said he received a report suggesting that the Deputy Rector of Yerevan State University supposedly urged deans and others to retaliate against students who joined the protests. Galstanyan said he was unsure whether the report was true, but decided to read it out loud anyway. On Tuesday he rallied his supporters to the backyard of the University where he demanded to speak with the Deputy Rector for clarification.
The Deputy Rector went downstairs and greeted Galstanyan, who shook her hand but wouldn't let it go for an uncomfortably long period, prompting her to ask him to let go of her hand. The Deputy Rector declared that whatever Galstanyan read about her was a defamatory lie.
GALSTANYAN: I never believed it myself.
DEPUTY RECTOR: Then you should not have said out loud something you did not believe.
GALSTANYAN: Listen, there is a recorded fact...
DEPUTY RECTOR: Where is that "recorded fact"?
GALSTANYAN: It was on the media. As I said yesterday, I had no verification that it was true, which is why we came here to clarify it. If it's false, then I apologize.
DEPUTY RECTOR: Thank you. //
The Deputy Rector urged the protest organizers not to enter the building or disrupt the classes, and that "anyone who wants to follow you can follow you, anyone who wants to stay in classrooms should stay in classrooms".
The angry Deputy Rector left. Another university official criticized Galstanyan for not checking the information before reading it to his followers. Galstanyan said he stands behind his words, and that he was "just reading what was on the media", but reiterated that he had no intention to insult the Deputy Rector.
ԳԼՈՒԽ 4
Galstanyan and his supporters visited the monument dedicated to Operation Nemesis. He praised the figures behind Nemesis for "assuming personal responsibility". In front of the crowd, Galstanyan introduced Hambig Sassounian who recently joined his movement. He pointed to the Nemesis monument and said Sassounian is "one of the successors, one of the brightest people." In related news, on Sunday a ruling faction MP complained about receiving death threats with reference to Operation Nemesis.
ԳԼՈՒԽ 5
DANIEL IOANNESIAN (NGO chief): When this protest dies down, we need to discuss the following: (1) The transparency of political and media funding. There are some regulations in place, but they are incomplete and easily bypassed. For example, I'd like to know who paid for Archbishop Galstanyan's giant stage in Republic Square. In 2018 Pashinyan organized a fundraising for it and disclosed a detailed report. (2) Should the media organizations that do not respect the rules of financial transparency enjoy all the mechanisms for the protection of journalists? (3) Are the customs authorities confident that the church is not facilitating the business activities of certain figures disguised as donations? (4) Is it fair for the church and clergy members not to pay taxes? Should they be able to have a Bently and LX570 without paying taxes? [The "Bentley" is based on a true story.]
ԳԼՈՒԽ 6
Archbishop's fans spotted Miss Armenia 2003 and a H1 host Lusine Tovmasyan drinking a coffee at a Yerevan café and approached her.
PROTESTER: (unintelligable)
LUSINE: I was here drinking coffee yesterday, and a year before that.
PROTESTER: Why have you not joined the holy struggle?
LUSINE: Լավ եկեք թարգեք, շատ զզվելի ա, էնքան զզվելի ա․ //
ԳԼՈՒԽ 7
Pro-Kremlin propagandist Alexander Dugin praised the pro-Russian forces' protests in Armenia and criticized the pro-EU protests in Georgia.
Pro-Kremlin Russian politician Semyon Baghdasarov praised Archbishop Bagrat and the ongoing "uprising" in Armenia against the "traitor" [Nikol] who "rigged" the elections with the help of "Turkey, UK, and US". Nikol is a Turkish MI6 agent. video,
ԳԼՈՒԽ 8
Video of a protest recorded from above: video
source, video, video, video, video, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, video,

Armenian government has upgraded other diplomatic channels to reduce reliance on ARF's diaspora structures in the US, says pro-West NGO chief

KHURSHUDYAN: The status of the Armenian Ambassador to the U.S. [Lilith Makunts] has been significantly upgraded. I won't go into specifics because it's tied to our neighbors, but she plays an interesting role there. We have great conditions for the U.S. Congress to pressure Azerbaijan. This is outside of ARF's lobbyist groups in the U.S.
REPORTER: ARF Hay Dat's recent conduct has been shameful.
KHURSHUDYAN: And its influence on the Lemkin Institute was obvious. //
Yesterday Kurshudyan accused the Lemkin Institute of caving to ARF's pressure and meddling into Armenia's internal affairs to assist the protests by the pro-Russian former regime.
KHURSHUDYAN: Lemkin Institute accused Pashinyan's April 24 genocide remembrance day statement of containing "victim blaming". Lemkin did not comment on Pashinyan's statement for several weeks, waited 15 days, and as soon as these pro-Russian protests began in Armenia, they gave them a պաս:
source,

Armenia's four most prominent pro-West opposition parties announce the formation of a unified platform

Republic Party, led by ex-PM Aram Sargsyan.
Hanun Republic Party, led by Arman Babajanyan.
European Party of Armenia, led by Tigran Khzmalyan.
Christian-Democratic Party, led by Levon Shirinyan.
Have the following agenda...
(1) Promotion of Western values in Armenia and Armenia's membership in EU and NATO.
(2) United front against threats and risks of destabilization coming from Russia.
(3) Vetting judges to clean up the courts, and resolution of issues left unaddressed by the Pashinyan administration.
(4) Continuation of border demarcation based on 1991 Almaty.
(5) The use of international law to achieve a fair resolution for Nagorno-Karabakh residents.
The platform is open for like-minded forces to join.
source,

Armenian army chief denies being a Russian citizen

A statement released by the defense ministry denies media reports that CoGS LtGen Edward Asryan is a dual citizen of Russia. His wife is an ethnic Russian with Armenian citizenship and his kids are dual citizens, but Asryan only has citizenship in Armenia. The whole family has resided in Armenia since 2006, said the statement.
source,

Georgia passes controversial ‘foreign agents’ bill despite widespread opposition

The law will require organizations receiving more than 20% of their funding from abroad to register as “agents of foreign influence” or face crippling fines.
The bill will be sent to the President who is expected to veto it, but her veto is expected to be overruled by the parliamentary majority later.
Georgian PM Kobakhidze had an "honest conversation" with U.S. deputy foreign minister James O'Brien, telling him that the Georgian government is interested in deepening the partnership with the U.S., "which requires mutual efforts and relations based on fairness."
James O'Brien demanded to speak with the manager - Bidza Ivanishvili. The latter refused to meet O'Brien, saying he won't hold any meetings under "blackmail".
The White House said the U.S. will review its relations with Georgia if the bill becomes law.
source, source, source,

how many of the 101,000 Nagorno-Karabakh refugees have left Armenia and haven't returned yet?

As of...
Dec: 6.6K
Jan: 6.9K
Mar: 8.0K
Apr: 9.1K
May: 9.9K
The former Ombudsman of Nagorno-Karabakh said many of them have family members and friends in Russia who invite them to move.
source,

temperatures are rising rapidly in Armenia

REPORTER: The rainy May is not going to be enough to alleviate the negative consequences of the rapidly rising temperatures in Armenia. With a ~3 Celsius anomaly, Armenia had the second-highest increase in temperature over the last 6 months among a group of monitored countries.
WEATHER CENTER: High temperatures increase the evaporation of water and reduce the amount of snow in the winter. In December and January, we recorded rain instead of snow in certain mountainous regions, which is bad for water resources.
REPORTER: A conference was recently held in Yerevan within the framework of the UN Convention to Combat Desertification.
UN official: Around 40% of global soils are degraded. Millions of people will be forced to migrate from their communities by 2050 as a result of climate problems. Emergency action is needed to reduce the rate of rising temperatures. //
Armenia joined the Convention three decades ago and has assumed the responsibility to restore degraded soil by 2030. The government is promoting drip irrigation systems for farming and wants to plant more trees.
video,

is the decline of Lake Sevan levels finally slowing down?

see the YoY chart

Yerevan Municipality to receive a €25 million loan from European Investment Bank to raise energy efficiency

It's part of the implementation of Eastern Partnership programs. The Armenian government and the EU are co-financing it.
The goal is to raise energy efficiency and carry out seismic retrofitting in 6 medical clinics and 32 kindergartens run by the municipality. The length of the program is 4 years.
video, video,

Gagik Tsarukyan is inside you

there is a bit of Tsarukyan inside all of you
see it to believe it

Gagik Tsarukyan says the new Jesus statue is ready and will be installed by the end of 2025

It will be a tourist attraction site. There will be a ropeway. Also, Tsarukyan needs you to know that he is a man of God and an avid believer.
video,

Armenia and Slovakia discussed AM-EU visa liberalization

source,

Lithuania will help retrain Armenian law enforcement agents to combat cybercrime, analyze crimes, etc.

source,

Armenia's Economy Minister Papoyan met the U.S. Assistant Secretary of State for Energy Resources Geoffrey Pyatt

In a Washington meeting participated by the Armenian Ministry delegation and Armenia's Ambassador, they spoke about the Crossroads of Peace logistics project proposed by Armenia, several topics relating to Armenia's energy and economic security, and the Armenian government's ongoing efforts to classify Armenia as a "market economy".
source,

Armenia and Iran discussed the construction of a second bridge over the River Araks

The first bridge began operating in 1996. It came to replace the floating bridges on the river.
Iran says the AM-IR traffic through the Meghri checkpoint significantly increased last year. Coupled with the fact that Armenia is building a modern North-South highway, they believe it's necessary to have a second AM-IR bridge to handle the rising traffic.
The parties are currently discussing the formation of a working group consisting of experts to discuss the topic.
source,

a new study on mice indicates that more exercise might be better than more sleep for clearing brain of toxins

They injected a dye into a brain and tracked the speed of its movement during sleep and exercise.
The findings show that the clearance of the dye was reduced by 30% in sleeping mice compared with mice that were kept awake. This has not been confirmed on humans yet.
Previous research has suggested that sleep is important for preventing dementia as it is during this time that toxic proteins are cleared from the brain.
source, source,

My friend from high school missed by undergraduate graduation and graduation because she dropped out.
I (23 F) have been friends with this woman (23 F lets call her BEBE) since my freshmen year of high school. After high school, we still remained good friends and really we became closer after graduating hs. We ended up going to different universities, BEBE decided to go to a private university out of state and I decided to stay in state for college. BEBE dropped out of school during the second semester of freshman after struggling academically, and financially to keep up with tuition, and as a result, she began to struggle mentally. During BEBE's time out of school, she went to a community college on and off due to not being able to keep her grades up and she lost scholarships because her grades were too low so she had to work to pay for community college (she still stays at home and her mom was not helping her pay for school anymore since she was still paying off the loan from the university). Our friend group suggested that she take a break from school to get right mentally and financially. We have had multiple conversations about comparing her journey to others and how we are all on our own timeline. Right before my undergraduate graduation BEBE car was repoed and our other friend (lets call her Mia) had a birthday so I know it would have been difficult for her to attend my undergraduate graduation, she also said that it would have been difficult for her mentally to attend because she wasn't graduating. I respected that at the time. I was accepted into a one-year accelerated graduate program. During that one extra year of school, BEBE came down to my school to party multiple times, we took roads trips, and attended family events with each other (every time I would drive back home I tried my best to see her, like EVERYTIME even seeing her over my own best friend sometimes because she stayed closer to my mom's house). As my graduate graduation is approaching I told my friend group that I wouldn't be able to attend Mia's birthday plans this year because I had work, finals, and my graduation was the weekend following her birthday(which was on a Friday) ( honestly I was completely overwhelmed with a lot of things at the time and I was completely transparent about how overwhelmed I was feeling). I had told them multiple times that my graduation was coming up but BEBE and Mia never even acknowledged I said anything about my graduation ( I never gave them details because they never asked and honestly I wasn't expecting them to come because they didn't attend last year). On top of that my car was stolen right before I had to go and take a final exam, THREE days before my graduation, and the day before Mia's birthday this year, I was literally devastated and really just needed my family and friends support. We have a group chat ( Me, BEBE, Mia, and our other friend Sarah). In the group chat, the day of my graduate graduation, Mia was upset with Sarah because she fell asleep on Mia's birthday plans (activity was scheduled for 8 PM but it didn't happen until 11:30 PM), Mind you Sarah stays about 45-60 mins away from the activity and was waiting for them to tell her to leave out. BEBE follows up with a message saying that it felt like nobody cared about Mia's birthday. So I responded by saying I apologize for not being as enthusiastic about Mia's birthday this year but it was literally because I was overwhelmed which I expressed to them before that day and that I was dealing with my car being stolen (I haven't told them up until this point because I had no time to process this on top of making sure I finish my classes strong and I was still quite upset about it and didn't want to keep thinking about it). They never acknowledged my message... so I sent another text saying how I was upset that they didn't put in any effort to come to either of my graduations. after that BEBE and Mia were saying they felt the friendship was unequal, they were never formally invited, and that they weren't talking to me originally but yet they kept using "yall" and using other plural words instead of messaging Sarah separately or being direct. Mind you this is a couple hours before my graduation and they still didn't even acknowledge that it's my graduation day, didn't get a congratulation or even checked to see if I was okay after having my car stolen and expressing to them I was overwhelmed. Then BEBE and Mia started saying why should they tell me congratulations soo early when they didn't know what time my graduation was and the fact I didn't tell Mia happy birthday until the evening time on her actual birthday ( less not forget my car was stolen the day before and I was also at work trying to make calls to my insurance agent ). I never formally gave them details because they never asked or even acknowledged I said anything about my graduation. Then they went on to say they didn't even have a ride to my graduation but im like yall could've rode with Sarah but then BEBE goes she had to look after her 16 year old twin brothers......... and she wasn't attending no ones graduation because she isn't graduating. Personally I feel that is so selfish!!!!!! like I understand she's not graduating but like I just needed my friends' support during a difficult time. her saying she couldn't celebrate my accomplishments and perseverance because she's not where she wants to be in life is so not fair and it feels like she's in secret competition with me. BEBE states like she still mentally is struggling to deal with graduation season and personally I just feel like I am struggling mentally too and I have been a good friend to her through all her mental break downs so her not showing up for me is her simply being a fake friend, only wanting to party, drink, and smoke but when I needed her just to show up as a friend (and not for her to compare her life to mine) she couldn't and I am so disappointed. She ended up leaving the group chat and I am willing to lose this friendship because I feel I have really show up her on so many different occasions whether it be mentally and even financially. After all of that I just wanted to get a different perspective to see if I should've gave her more grace or no? Thank you for coming to my TED talk and appreciate yall POV!

I always wait till this moment to try and plan my daughter's birthday party at the end of June, and it's a nightmare. Our apartment is too tiny to host.
Does anyone have suggestions for venues? I have to invite the class, so it'll be a bigger crowd.
Note: I've been burned too many times by park birthday parties even to attempt that level of undertaking.

I usually look up build guides on YouTube since my only experience with DnD is from playing Baldur’s Gate 3 and I like to see cool techniques people come up with.
I want to do an Honor Mode run and I’m setting up my party which is Main: Storm SorcereCleric Lae’zel: Open Hand Monk/Thief Rogue Shadowheart: Tempest Cleric
I feel like I have so many spellcasters which I’m sure I can make work because I want to use Gale. I haven’t had him in my party before unless I was working on his quest. I’m also interested in doing a Gale romance in this run since I think he’d mesh well the best with my custom character (plus I already romanced Shadowheart and I’m planning on romancing Karlach in another run I’m doing, also I’m bitter cause I can’t romance Wyll since you can’t romance him without killing Karlach or without him side kicking in Karlach’s story)
Anyway, I don’t want to play him as a straight up Wizard. I think being a bard suits him as well. Also, I would like to try Bard. However, since so much of his story revolves around being a Wizard I do want him to take some Wizard levels
I want him to be College of Lore Bard and Divination Wizard which I’m pretty committed to. The part I’m stuck on is how many levels to take of each and if I should possibly also do a sorcerer dip to gain access to meta magic. I’ll get less feats if I do that. Also I’m not sure if it’s better to go up to 10 bard to get more bard features or if I should gain more wizard benefits like spell restoration and slots.
I know for sure I want at least 6 levels in Bard and 2 levels in Wizard. The rest is up in the air. So what do you think?

My friend from high school missed by undergraduate graduation and graduation because she dropped out.
I (23 F) have been friends with this woman (23 F lets call her BEBE) since my freshmen year of high school. After high school, we still remained good friends and really we became closer after graduating hs. We ended up going to different universities, BEBE decided to go to a private university out of state and I decided to stay in state for college. BEBE dropped out of school during the second semester of freshman after struggling academically, and financially to keep up with tuition, and as a result, she began to struggle mentally. During BEBE's time out of school, she went to a community college on and off due to not being able to keep her grades up and she lost scholarships because her grades were too low so she had to work to pay for community college (she still stays at home and her mom was not helping her pay for school anymore since she was still paying off the loan from the university). Our friend group suggested that she take a break from school to get right mentally and financially. We have had multiple conversations about comparing her journey to others and how we are all on our own timeline. Right before my undergraduate graduation BEBE car was repoed and our other friend (lets call her Mia) had a birthday so I know it would have been difficult for her to attend my undergraduate graduation, she also said that it would have been difficult for her mentally to attend because she wasn't graduating. I respected that at the time. I was accepted into a one-year accelerated graduate program. During that one extra year of school, BEBE came down to my school to party multiple times, we took roads trips, and attended family events with each other (every time I would drive back home I tried my best to see her, like EVERYTIME even seeing her over my own best friend sometimes because she stayed closer to my mom's house). As my graduate graduation is approaching I told my friend group that I wouldn't be able to attend Mia's birthday plans this year because I had work, finals, and my graduation was the weekend following her birthday(which was on a Friday) ( honestly I was completely overwhelmed with a lot of things at the time and I was completely transparent about how overwhelmed I was feeling). I had told them multiple times that my graduation was coming up but BEBE and Mia never even acknowledged I said anything about my graduation ( I never gave them details because they never asked and honestly I wasn't expecting them to come because they didn't attend last year). On top of that my car was stolen right before I had to go and take a final exam, THREE days before my graduation, and the day before Mia's birthday this year, I was literally devastated and really just needed my family and friends support. We have a group chat ( Me, BEBE, Mia, and our other friend Sarah). In the group chat, the day of my graduate graduation, Mia was upset with Sarah because she fell asleep on Mia's birthday plans (activity was scheduled for 8 PM but it didn't happen until 11:30 PM), Mind you Sarah stays about 45-60 mins away from the activity and was waiting for them to tell her to leave out. BEBE follows up with a message saying that it felt like nobody cared about Mia's birthday. So I responded by saying I apologize for not being as enthusiastic about Mia's birthday this year but it was literally because I was overwhelmed which I expressed to them before that day and that I was dealing with my car being stolen (I haven't told them up until this point because I had no time to process this on top of making sure I finish my classes strong and I was still quite upset about it and didn't want to keep thinking about it). They never acknowledged my message... so I sent another text saying how I was upset that they didn't put in any effort to come to either of my graduations. after that BEBE and Mia were saying they felt the friendship was unequal, they were never formally invited, and that they weren't talking to me originally but yet they kept using "yall" and using other plural words instead of messaging Sarah separately or being direct. Mind you this is a couple hours before my graduation and they still didn't even acknowledge that it's my graduation day, didn't get a congratulation or even checked to see if I was okay after having my car stolen and expressing to them I was overwhelmed. Then BEBE and Mia started saying why should they tell me congratulations soo early when they didn't know what time my graduation was and the fact I didn't tell Mia happy birthday until the evening time on her actual birthday ( less not forget my car was stolen the day before and I was also at work trying to make calls to my insurance agent ). I never formally gave them details because they never asked or even acknowledged I said anything about my graduation. Then they went on to say they didn't even have a ride to my graduation but im like yall could've rode with Sarah but then BEBE goes she had to look after her 16 year old twin brothers......... and she wasn't attending no ones graduation because she isn't graduating. Personally I feel that is so selfish!!!!!! like I understand she's not graduating but like I just needed my friends' support during a difficult time. her saying she couldn't celebrate my accomplishments and perseverance because she's not where she wants to be in life is so not fair and it feels like she's in secret competition with me. BEBE states like she still mentally is struggling to deal with graduation season and personally I just feel like I am struggling mentally too and I have been a good friend to her through all her mental break downs so her not showing up for me is her simply being a fake friend, only wanting to party, drink, and smoke but when I needed her just to show up as a friend (and not for her to compare her life to mine) she couldn't and I am so disappointed. She ended up leaving the group chat and I am willing to lose this friendship because I feel I have really show up her on so many different occasions whether it be mentally and even financially. After all of that I just wanted to get a different perspective to see if I should've gave her more grace or no? Thank you for coming to my TED talk and appreciate yall POV!

I've been waiting to see if it popped up.
If so, mine is during the discussion on whether to invite the Melbrook crew to the Freshman welcome party in their Sophomore year.
"We're not supers, we're aspiring Heroes. That means we need to do the right thing, *especially* when it's hard or unpopular."

TW: SA
For some context, I 22 (F) have a sister 21 (F). Ever since we were 15 and 16, she has had these crippling migraines. She has been to over 18 different specialist all around the country trying to figure out what is wrong with her, and they have found absolutely nothing wrong with her. Over the years she uses her migraines as an excuse to get out of anything she doesn't want to do, for example church, school, family events. But her migraines miraculously disappear as soon as something she does want to do comes up. Personally, I suffer with migraines as well our difference is mine was diagnosed from the TMJ that I now have from dislocating my jaw when I was 12. She loves to use her migraines as a way to either get out of something she doesn't want to do or uses it to garner sympathy from friends' family and strangers.
In 2019 she used her migraines as an excuse to not go to school at all and used them to get a doctor's note stating that even though she cannot attend school she should still graduate. 2020 rolls around and we can no longer go to school because of Covid and miraculously she has no migraines and goes out day and night to hang out with friends. Then when she goes off to college all of a sudden, these migraines come back coupled with severe dehydration to the point where she has to be hospitalized on multiple occasions, except these migraines only occur Friday Saturday and Sunday mornings after her sorority throws a party.
Summer of 2021, she gets the opportunity to participate in a college work program in Florida for the whole 3 months of summer. She goes and after only 3 weeks of being there her migraines get so bad that she has to come home. It is important to note that she comes home the day before Father's Day. Father's Day comes and we all go to church and out to lunch and have a great time. That night however my parents come to my room to ask me if I have spoken with my sister this evening and I tell them no. They proceed to tell me that my sister has runaway to Virginia (we live in Oklahoma) to live with her Boyfriend 26 (M) and that she has sent them a video to explain why.
This video states that she is leaving and never coming back because she has been assaulted on multiple occasions by multiple men in her life and that it is too traumatic to even be in the state so Shes leaving. She then follows with telling my parents that they are horrible people who have never loved or cared about her and that they are the reason this is all happening. She also sent similar videos to her friends as well. This video absolutely crushed my parents, it was the first time I ever saw my dad cry.
We grew up in a strange family, my parents couldn't have children of their own so they adopted us. But our biological families are all still very much in our lives. Our parents are the most amazing and caring people in the world and would give life and limb to anyone in need. So, to hear her saying these things about my parents not only hurt them but it also hurt me to see her putting them through all that.
She was only gone for a month because eventually my father flew out to her to get her and bring her home. Now I am someone who has to know everything, I cant leave a topic untouched, I always have to investigate and get every side of the story. But in that month, I ended up uncovering a few things about the stories she told in those videos she sent to my parents and her friends. In that time, I uncovered that the stories of abuse that she was speaking about were of previous boyfriends that she had had. Every single boyfriend had a story of abuse, and these stories had credible witnesses attached to each and every story. While combing through all of this information I come to the educated conclusion that they are false and told only in a specific way to frame her as the victim using a way that no one would dare call her a liar because who would blame the victim?
When she came back it was really hard on everyone because we had all been heavily affected by this experience that she has put us all through, but she just acted like it never happened and continued to act like she deserved everything. But anytime anyone would mention anything about what happened she would absolutely freak out scream and curse and throw a massive tantrum and storm off and slam her door. In this time, I have personally decided that I will just act like she doesn't exist, I won't speak to her or acknowledge her.
Fast forward to now January 2024, she has convinced my parents that the best thing for her is moving to Florida to go to school because in her words "it is the one place I don't get migraines". I pointed out to my parents that the last time she lived in Florida she only lasted 3 weeks before claiming migraine. Apparently, she only lasted a month at the school before dropping all of her classes and just living it up in her apartment that my parents pay for. And she only informed my parents over spring break that she dropped out because her migraines were too bad. She is now home and living with my parents again and continues to spread her stories of assault and abuse as well as her stories of migraines to literally anyone that will listen.
I'd like to add that throughout all of these years she never fails to make sure I am the one that somehow suffers through it all. Throughout her Migraines I was the one that had to take care of her, I was the one that got in trouble when she screwed up, I was the one that had to pay for all of her mistakes. After years and years of watching her lies not only hurt me and my family but also slowly chip away at what used to be a happy and close nit family I don't think I can live with it any longer. My mother continues to stand by her side and call me a liar anytime I call my sister out on her lies, and my relationship with my mom has suffered for it. My father knows my sister is lying but fears speaking up because it might anger my mom. This whole experience has divided our family.
Another thing of note is that I value honesty over everything else, I will call anyone and everyone out on their bull. This last weekend we were at a graduation party and sitting there and listening to her speak and talking about all of this to literal strangers and because we were in public I had to physically literally bite my tongue to keep myself from speaking which resulted in me actually biting off a piece of my tongue. I honestly have come to the end of my rope of patience and I don't want her in my life anymore. So am I the asshole?

I have two kids: my son is 8 and my daughter is 11. My son has a friend “Timmy”. Timmy’s family is very friendly and my son plays with him often. My daughter somewhat knows Timmy but doesn’t really hang around him when he’s over.
I am not the type to assume either of my kids are invited to a party. If one of their names is on the invite, then just that one goes. Timmy invited my son to his birthday party at a bowling alley his name was the only one on the invite. My daughter came with me to drop off because we were supposed to go shopping after.
When we arrived, however, Timmy’s mom was confused as to why my daughter wasn’t staying. She said she assumed we’d figure she was invited too. She added that she already paid a certain number of kids, which included my daughter. I felt bad about this and chalked it up to miscommunication as clearly different families have different ways of handling siblings at parties.
As they paid for my daughter, I had her stay. She didn’t want to but i told her I wasn’t going to let them waste money. I left and came back when the party was over. My daughter was not happy with me.
Later on when I dropped the kids off with their dad, they told him what happened. My ex feels I was wrong to have her stay when she didn’t want to and it’s not her fault the hosts didn’t communicate.
Was I wrong to make her stay?

AITA
So to keep this short I have a bad past with my mother, though I love her, I have put up boundaries and keeping my space but I'm going to my college graduation which is out of town and I have already agreed to go with my dad and step mom.m My mom is now telling me y dad asked me to drive with him and my step mom to the graduation right after I invited them to come but when I invited my mom she told me we would talk about it later. She found out I'm going with my dad and step mom and is now upset with me cause she has to drive to my graduation alone. So AITA for letting my mom drive alone to my graduation?

I (25F) and my partner Alex (24M) went to his brother Luke’s (30M) wedding this past weekend, and I left early which has caused a lot of drama with his family.
I have been dating Alex for 3 years and we’ve been living together for 2. I think I’m pretty close with his family; I go to every holiday, we visit his parents very often, his mum often takes me out for lunch & we run errands together, I talk to Luke & their sister both almost every day, we house/dog sit for Luke & Tanya (30F, Luke’s now wife) often, etc. I talk to Tanya all the time, we go out for coffee dates, etc. We were pretty close, I think!
Anyway, the wedding. I’m Alex’s plus one, he’s a groomsman. I am not invited to the ceremony, but that’s alright, I figure there’s limited space. I arrive to the reception and the plan was that I was sitting with Alex & Luke’s & also Tanya’s parents, since I know them both well. Change of plans last minute, I’m actually moved to a table in the corner with the DJ & whichever cooks & servers were taking their break at that time. I will admit I was hurt and feeling anxious since the reception was huge & I wasn’t around anyone I knew (I am pretty socially anxious in crowds & with strangers), but I sucked it up & made small talk & was pleasant in general, because it’s not MY day.
After dinner, parents’ table was only about 3/4 full because some couldn’t make it, so they invite me over. I go to sit with them, but Tanya pulled me aside and said I can’t sit at the family table because photographers will be taking photos. Alex tries to come dance with me but Tanya tells him that he should stay at the wedding party table so that it isn’t empty for photos. Luke, the groom, eventually asks if I wanna dance with him since I’ve been sitting alone & he considers me his bonus little sister & he wants a dance with all of his family members at his wedding, but Tanya rushed in after about 30 seconds of dancing and pulled him away for something important.
I was getting the hint at this point, it was pretty clear I wasn’t very welcome here, but I still don’t know why. I caught Alex quick to say I wasn’t feeling well and I’d see him at home, I made my goodbyes, congratulated Luke and Tanya for their wedding, and ducked out.
Well… Alex is pissed at Tanya, because I told him everything after a cooling down period. Tanya is pissed at me for leaving early. Parents seem to be mad at me for “refusing to socialize;” I haven’t told them anything. Luke apologized to me but is otherwise staying out of it. The whole family is kind of in a fight now, I feel like it’s my fault because I left early, but I don’t even know how anyone noticed with how many people were there, I honestly figured I wouldn’t be missed.
I was just honestly really uncomfortable and really didn’t want to be there anymore, but I guess it was a wedding and maybe I should have just sucked it up. AITA?

This is about a neighbor and we walk our dogs together sometimes because our dogs love each other. This neighbor has also invited us to social events in the past and we have attended. When they had heaIth issues, we drove them to places sometimes.
This neighbor gets under my skin though, it's not someone I want to be close to because they seem overly judgemental about our other neighbors for a punchline. I do not trust them with anything too personal. They seem like the kind of person who would drag your name through the mud for little to no reason if u do the slightest thing wrong. Not someone who you'd want to get on the bad side of. They also remind me of those tiktoks of the insufferable indie girl idk maybe I am being too judgemental too haha... idk they just annoy me.
Is it wrong for me to feel like this? I don't normally feel this way towards people and I am also not used to having neighbors that I see frequently.
Today we were walking our dogs together and I offered to walk them back to their place, they declined bc their dog hadn't used the bathroom yet. Then we saw another neighbor that loves my dog but doesnt like the neighbor's dog that I was currently walking with. My dog really wanted to go to the other neighbor so I told the neighbor I was currently walking with (the one that I find to be annoying) that I was going over to other nieghbor and waved goodbye. I hope I'm explaining this in way that makes sense. When I did this the neighbor seemed disappointed or surprised from what I could tell.
Was this wrong or unkind of me to do? I knew that their dogs didn't get along. But I had just spent so much time with the other neighbor, I didn't think it would be hurtful of me to leave them... Maybe they could tell I wanted to not be with them any longer? This might sound horrible but as I kept thinking about it.. I kinda didn't care even if that did hurt their feelings?? I felt idk, controlled? Like I told myself I shouldnt care because I don't owe this neighbor my time, this is my life after all. Am I in the wrong? What if they don't have a lot of friends? :( I am not normally like this.
This doesn't mean that if they needed something or fell ill again that I wouldn't help them, it just seems like they really want to be friends with my partner and me and honestly I wouldn't want that. Not my cup of tea.
AIAA?
TLNR: I have a neighbor that annoys me and is kind of an asshole but seems like they want to be friends. I had an interaction with them that wasn't the most polite (but wasn't overtly rude) but I am realizing that I don't really care if I was polite or not to them. AIAA?

Hi everyone,
I’m 23 years old and I just graduated college last year. my employment history is honestly pretty shitty. I have a lot of short stints at jobs that make me look really flaky to a potential employer.
I currently work as an administrative assistant at a really large national financial services firm and I pretty much lied about everything that you could imagine on my résumé. (I added a year and a half of experience to my college internship. I changed a job title from receptionist to HR assistant and said that I was still working there when I applied to my current job, even though it was a seasonal position and it had ended three months prior.) I know lying is bad but my family doesn’t financially support me and I needed to make rent so I did what I thought I had to do to get a job.
When it came time for me to do the background check, I had to fill out an employment verification form so instead of filling out the dates and job titles that I put on my résumé I just filled out the truthful dates and positions. I was able to pass the background check without any major hiccups, and they offered me the role. (I should add that this was a very intense background check because it was for a financial services institution. I’m talking 10 year employment verification check, credit check, criminal background check and a drug test.)
I’ve been at my current job for about five months and it’s nothing like I imagined. The workload is really intense and although I think I’m gaining soft skills, I don’t think any of the hard skills I’m learning here will be applicable to any of the fields I would ideally like to go into. My boss is also kind of a creep and really rude.
I really want to find another job, but since I’ve only been here for five months, I feel like I need to lie again on my resume.
My question is, was it a fluke that I was able to pass such intense of a background check or could I get away with lying about my dates of employment again? I’m worried that I was only saved because I was able to manually fill in my past employment history, but if a third-party company did the research for themselves, they’d be able to see that I was lying. Any tips and information on how employment verification works would be great!

I never thought I’d be making a post like this. I still don’t know what to say.
My gf of 2 years was at a holiday party with someone who works in the same building. She slept with him over there and later confessed that she loves that guy.
She is older than me (23F) and always took care of me and loved me. Until not sure what really happened, she stopped communicating with me and told me that she wanted to end everything with me.
I am a college student, and I met her on one of these subreddits 2 years ago. We became really good friends and then we started dating.
I have been crying for a few hours. I don't know what to do. She blocked me everywhere after she told me that she was done.
I really need support. I don't have any friends we always use to chat or call. I just wish I hadn't wasted so much of my time on her 😭😭

I never thought I’d be making a post like this. I still don’t know what to say.
My gf of 2 years was at a holiday party with someone who works in the same building. She slept with him over there and later confessed that she loves that guy.
She is older than me (23F) and always took care of me and loved me. Until not sure what really happened, she stopped communicating with me and told me that she wanted to end everything with me.
I am a college student, and I met her on one of these subreddits 2 years ago. We became really good friends and then we started dating.
I have been crying for a few hours. I don't know what to do. She blocked me everywhere after she told me that she was done.
I really need support. I don't have any friends we always use to chat or call. I just wish I hadn't wasted so much of my time on her 😭😭

I’m attending UTK this fall semester as a Mechanical Engineer student to presume my bachelor degree, and I’m coming from a community college (graduated with an associate degree in spring of 2024), and I’m hoping to get to know some people.
I have a discord group for engineers and all engineers are accepted in the group. Currently all of the people who are in my group are my fellow classmates from community college who are also attending UTK this fall semester.
I live near west town mall side, so I’d be interested in talking/meeting anyone in Knoxville, and I’m looking forward to study along side of y’all.
Ps: if you’re interested in joining the “Engineer” discord, dm and I’ll invite you

Well, I think i should've put this in offmychest because this post is pretty much a vent but a little advice is appreciated.
For context, I'm in my late teens. I just graduated highschool and will be starting college later this year. I have a sister who's a few years younger than me.
Growing up, I was pretty much "daddy's little princess". He spoilt both my sister and me rotten ffs. We were a really happy family. He taught me everything he could and was ALWAYS there for us kids, no matter what. He always encouraged us to take up any hobby we wanted, drove us himself to and from classes, and I can't even talk about the books, toys and other things he got for us without it being an understatement. He was literally my superhero. When i was a kid, i seriously thought that my dad was the strongest and smartest person in the whole wide world. Not to mention, he was a really really good human being too. Even if a person totally unrelated to him reached out for help, he'd do his best to help them in a heartbeat. I love him so much, and could love no one else as much as him because he's literally the best dad ever.
Exactly a month ago, he had a subarachnoid brain hemorrhage unexpectedly. It was a huge shock seeing my dad unconscious on the floor with his head in a puddle of blood when we woke up in the morning. It was the last thing i expected to say the very least. My sister's birthday was on the previous day, so I put together a small party for her even if she refused and dad thanked me for taking care of my sister and told me that it was the best birthday he had ever witnessed in his life (it wasn't extravagant or anything, literally a small family gathering with cake and some snacks). The thing is, he didn't have high blood pressure, nor did he hurt his head (we didn't hear anything if he supposedly hit his head and fell down and he had no external injuries other than a black eye). We traveled and he drove a few hours on the day before my sister's birthday. Everything was completely normal and we actually had a great time together. He was in a coma for nearly two weeks and then was on life support for around another week after being diagnosed brain dead, because my mom and I needed time to process everything that was going on. We tried everything out there to try and get some response, from the regular medical things to sound therapy, accupressure, homeopathy and anything anyone suggested would work. But unfortunately, he didn't make it and faced a natural death a week or so ago (as in we didn't have to decide when to take him off life support)
They're doing funeral stuff and i don't want to be a part of anything because I'm being delusional and thinking that he's gonna come back. We have a golden retriever, who i take care of to keep me busy during the day and also because dad let me keep it as an emotional support animal, without which i would've committed again. At other times of the day, i just can't get myself to get out of bed. I feel really nauseous, my legs always feel tingly and almost like they're burning and I'm shaky sometimes. I've been on continuous medication and therapy for over a year now. My psychiatrist didn't want to diagnose me since he didn't want me to live with a label of a mental illness but a family doctor informally told us that I had BPD. I've gotten so much better with all the support I've gotten because at one point I used to attempt every other day to try to escape reality. At this point of time, both my parents were with me most of the time trying to provide as much support as they physically could, leaving my sister out a lot. I have some horrible things i don't remember doing as a child from my own memory that my sister told me about. My parents have endured so much and when things finally got better, this happened.
My dad worked with online security and stuff in the past so he was really scared of me getting into trouble. For context, I sent nudes to my bf (both of us were minors) two years ago and got caught because my phone was hacked. I didn't get to have a phone for nearly two years and though it seems like a bad thing, I did pretty well in school. Yeah well he was probably really stressed when I told him I'd still be talking to my bf once I finished school. I was originally supposed to study abroad, that might've caused him a lot of stress, knowing I'd be alone. He wasn't really okay with me dating either cuz he was paranoid guys would hurt me and ruin my life and he was also a little conservative too. Knowing that stress can be a cause of a SAH, I'm pretty sure I'm the cause for his death (I have this gruesome feeling that i physically feel when i mentioned that he died or anything like that). My little sister hates me for it, since she feels it was me who stressed him out with my mental issues. My mom's being as supportive as she can buy she's devastated too. I still take meds, and therapy. I have a LOT of family support, which I'm very grateful for, and also my bf who's been very patient with me. Everyone's literally taking time out of their day to tend to us and help us out. I've seen so many people who I'd never heard of or even seen in my life bawl their eyes when they visited dad at the hospital. That's just how much everyone loves him. I've been trying my best to stay strong but i just can't believe I lost him. I try telling myself to stop being delusional and that he isn't out on a work trip, but inside I'm just hoping my superhero fighter dad will be back all safe and sound. I visited him at the hospital a few times a day everyday and i always told him positive things and how much i loved him even if he could probably not hear anything, but when I saw him lifeless, I almost passed out. I couldn't believe that he was gone. I mean the doctors had told us that he'd only push until his heart could so it wasn't unexpected. He also had complications with blood clotting that added to the problem. I really have no idea what to do because the last thing he'd want is me laying in bed most of the day.
Tl;Dr : I lost my dad around a week ago and even with the help from medication, therapy and family and friends support I'm not able to get out of bed or accept that he's gone. Any advice on how I can get better is much appreciated
Sorry guys this post is all over the place, I'm sleep deprived even if I'm in bed most of the day and i have no idea what I'm saying, and i have no idea how to put my emotions in words