Hey everyone. My (32m) roommate (38m) and I got priced out of Park Slope and relocated to Washington Heights earlier this year. It’s cool, much different and reminds me of “South Slope” down in the 50s, but one thing I noticed is these Spanish women do not age.
I noticed one lady with an amazing figure walking with a youngster like 5 years old getting off the A train. I walked alongside her and then heard the kid call her “abuela” — I thought she was the mom!
I looked at her face for like 30 seconds and I would’ve said early thirties but I looked at her hands and guessed late 50s…
I’ve been going to a restaurant that sells “mofongo” this kind of food that’s name I thought was a swear word but it’s pretty just mashed potatoes and meats. The waitress there is gorgeous and suggested I try the “arrows con poyo” that had a lot of orange rice and chicken that you can’t find outside of that one restaurant. I had six Presidente beers and talked to the waitress lady all night in Spanglish. I made a move and we ended up back at my place and ended up hooking up.
What first gave me pause was the mesh bra and tan “granny” style panty that she wore to the top of her abdomen. It was pretty hot but when I looked at her the next morning, she went from like 38 to 62. It turns out she was 71 but honest to god she looked great. She had one of those “Jitterbug” and said “omgah 22 miss call from Giancarlo,” who turned out to be her boyfriend who’s jacked and pitches for a local softball team. Now I can’t go there anymore and Gian is now coming by building a lot with some guys I see playing dominoes by the small park.
My roommate told the group chat of our friends, one that I’m not in for some reason, and two of them just blocked me. One dude sees me and says in a playful animated voice, “what’s up you mother… I mean GRAND mother fucker…” and it’s been very embarrassing.
So I guess I’m self conscious now that about my white cis het male gaze and wonder what I should do about it…

Bold title, no? Unlike Adora’s backgrounds, it’s not rage bait. i ask anyone who is skeptical or even fearsome about possibly denying Adora’s identity as a lesbian to carefully read my words, and interpret them in the most positive way possible (iykyk).
What is a lesbian? Simply put, a lesbian is a woman who is attracted solely to other women. Some people say females attracted to females but I don’t hold to that definition since trans men exist and although they’re female, they’re not the same as women.
How does Adora define the word “lesbian”? In countless lives, Adora has claimed lesbian to mean “a non-man attracted to other non-men”.
Is this just a verbal dispute? Women are technically non-men. Aren’t you basically saying the same thing? No. To all of that. We’re saying completely different things and please allow me to explain.
I’m not going to get into the feminism of why “non-man” is disgustingly misogynistic, because let’s face it— it does not seem as though misogyny is something Adora is worried about perpetuating. Let’s break down the words instead. “Non-man” is broad. It simply refers to anyone who is not a man. But what is a man? Regardless of your view on the sex-gender distinction, we can all agree on one thing— men are adults. A boy isn’t a man, he’s a child. Is a boy a lesbian as long as he’s attracted to other children regardless of gender? Under adora’s definition, yes. A boy WOULD be considered a lesbian because he is not yet a man.
That’s problem #1. We have to be more specific. Otherwise, there is absolutely no meaning to the words we say. My definition, women attracted to women, provides far more utility while being concise and specific. Woman = adult human female. This definition includes trans women (psycho-socially) while keeping out children. Yes, this would exclude nonbinary people, but the word is exclusive by nature. Non binary people are not women. “Lesbian” has always been used mono-sexually (sexually attracted to one gender). Women who are ONLY attracted to other women are by definition lesbians. Women attracted to women and nonbinary people would not be monosexual. They are BISEXUAL at least. Ask any bisexual woman if she’s a lesbian. The answer will be a staunch NO.
Adora— if you like women and nonbinary people, you might be bi, pan, etc. If you only like women then woohoo you’re a lesbian. Hijacking the word “lesbian” to avoid labeling yourself as bi or something similar is inherently biphobic and lesbophobic.
I wavered on whether or not I’d speak on this at length until today when Adora proudly proclaimed that any definition of lesbian besides “non man attracted to non men” is transphobic. It’s not transphobic to say words have meaning. Nobody is denying anyone’s gender identity. We’re simply saying that “lesbian” already has a meaning. And someone being attracted to 2 or more genders already has a name too!! They are bisexual, at least. If the latter is you, Adora, you have 2 logical paths. Either stop claiming the lesbian label, OR, admit you still subconsciously see at least some nonbinary people as women. It’s okay to be bi. What’s not okay is denying that nonbinary people are just that— not binary.
That’s my logical argument. Now for a more emotional one. I, and many other women, have struggled for years to accept the label of lesbian. Online, it is easy to proudly proclaim it because i dont know yall and yall dont know me. You don’t know the people around me, you dont know my family. But in real life, there is still a lot of shame and stigma surrounding being a woman who is solely attracted to other women. I’m not even out to my parents or siblings as a lesbian. They know i’m not straight, but they don’t know I’m exclusively into women. For a man to come out as gay, nobody bats an eyelash anymore. Sure they might get homophobic remarks here and there, but nobody is looking at them differently as men. But if a woman is a lesbian, homophobia AND misogyny rear theirs ugly heads and her whole purpose in life is questioned. What will she do if she’s not contributing to the world as a wife and mother? (Not to say lesbians can’t get married and have kids, but the process is harder and seen by some as less legitimate). Even today, as women, our proximity to men is still held above our heads. Sure, women can get bank accounts without a husband’s signature and vote for themselves now. But men still see us as an extension of our husbands. They see two women together and think we’re just playing house till we find the “right man”. We’re fetishized, infantilized, and downright devalued as soon as we accept our label. Did you know “lesbian” is the number 1 searched category for porn? Men make up 80% of porn-watchers alone. Do you really believe it’s the 20% of women on these sites searching for lesbian porn? No. Lesbians are still seen as something for men’s enjoyment and consumption. We, as gay women, are still fighting to be viewed as legitimate, normal, human beings with our own thoughts, feelings, hopes, and dreams. Adora, if it is the case that you’re attracted to women and nonbinary people, it seems to me that you trying on the most controversial label and re-defining it to piss people off and make lesbians’ already difficult existence even more difficult.
To everyone else: please do not make transphobic remarks under this post. I believe trans women are women and therefore can fit under my definition of lesbian. I’m not saying Adora isn’t a lesbian because she’s trans. I’m saying Adora would not be a lesbian if she’s attracted to 2 or more genders.
If anyone has any questions, please comment. I’ll try to get to as many as possible to clear up any miscommunication and things of the sort. Please remember that I am human and may not mean something the way you read it. It’s ok to ask for clarification. Also I forgive myself for any misspeaking (iykyk).

No one has to read this. I don't even know if this is due to my partners ADHD, or rather, how much of it, if any...
Brain Dump
I feel sad I feel confused I feel abandoned I feel extremely frustrated I feel betrayed I feel resentment I feel annoyed I feel wrath
Ultimately, I don't feel security, love, safety, partnership, trust or protection.
Isn't the point of being in a partnership ... all of the above? When one man is down, the other man has their back?
In ways, I can see where my husband tries to show up and help - but it is in the way he wants to show up - the easy/convenient way. Perhaps that is all he is capable of? Perhaps that is all he is truly willing to do. I just don't buy the fact that he doesn't know how, otherwise. I know he has ADHD - but is it so severe that he is truly incapable of planning ANYTHING? Making appointments? Adulting in anyway? I feel bad complaining and am confused over the fact that he does "help" ... and he does "try" (I think? I'm not so sure). I'm confused about how to feel regarding his ADHD. Is he so impaired, truly impaired that he cannot plan anything or put forth effort?
I guess as I'm writing this out it is the effort part that I have frustration with. Maybe inwardly he truly feels like he is trying his hardest. I mean he did buy me hair ties on two occasions, the second time stopping to get the correct ones (which he did not have to do). That is unusually thoughtful of him. He also got flowers for mothers day and a card (but my 7 year old was with him and I'm convinced she saw the mothers day cards first and then told him she wanted a card, he followed suit. Then went to walmart and got flowers. This is really the first time he has done anything for mothers day (well bought something, as nothing was done for mothers day - typical day for me). But here I sit, still confused. Am I being ungrateful? I mean, he DID do these things and he didn't have to. Again, it is the effort (it was a matter of convenience). It is the thoughtfulness. It is thinking about someone else besides himself (or better yet, being out from behind his phone screen just long enough to form a thought - let alone a thought about others and how he can make their life better and show up for them).
Effort. That's an interesting word. Effort can mean different things to different people. Does he TRULY think he is putting forth as much effort as he can, or is at least aware of it and is consistently trying? Does he look up videos and articles and seek out coaching or resources to understand his personal challenges with ADHD? Does he strive for improvement everyday? Does he work on his thought process, telling himself he can improve and will? Or does he just self loathe, pity and wallow. And yet - another juxtaposition.
The times I have tried to communicate with him about how desperate our situation is, how much despair our marriage and family is in - he continues to sit there silent and say nothing. We cannot ever resolve ANYTHING. There is no conversation, teamwork, or resolution. It's just me having to deal with it. How have I survived 17 years of this (with 4 kids and a business?!) The other night he did cry pretty hard, trying to choke back tears, and here I am ... laying beside him, feeling no empathy. What is this existence? I have never felt true APATHY. Esp about someone I care about (even those that I don't know or care about). He is boo-hooing and all I can say is "yeah - I've been there, many times. It fucking hurts doesn't it?" I did not say it in a rude, 'I'm going to get you back way.' Just a flat statement that, otherwise uttered from my lips would hold some empathy and understanding behind it.
I am less empathetic and patient with my kids. I never wanted to turn into this person - and yet, I'm slipping slowly. I've been fighting it for so long. One of my best (and worst) qualities was the ability to truly care for others (including strangers) and feel true sympathy and empathy for them. To hold space for them. To CARE. Is this the definition of jaded? Bitter? Scorned?
I've slowly been losing my brightness, my spark, my light. Over the last 2 years I hard core burnt out, hit rock bottom, could barely function (and yet, still had to, at least on the days I could get out of bed). My bulb went completely out, completely burnt out and beyond (I never knew it could get that severe). I've gotten some light back, but it's just dim enough to see on a pitch black night. I have fought for my sleep disorder, worked with doctors, and after years, have finally found a combination of meds that seem to be working for me (depression, anxiety, pmdd - or is it all a result of living with an adhd partner? gosh, I don't know).
I've struggled to be a nurturing mom since the beginning. Not because I am not capable of it - but because there has always been an imbalance in our relationship and I've always been in this position. One foot on a just big-enough platform and the other foot/leg tucked up by my knee, much like a flamingo. I am a flamingo. I am a FLAMINGO?!
No, if I were a flamingo I would have a truly mated pair; an involved other parent. I would have a social network, life-long friendships and webbed feet that allow me to gracefully glide through the water. If I were a flamingo, my feet would be missing the webbing - I would endlessly and relentlessly paddle and barely move forward. The effort would be tremendous. If I were a flamingo, my partner flamingo would use his webbed feet and swim way ahead, only noticing my absence far after the fact. If I were a flamingo, I would be balanced and in harmony - effortlessly existing, surrounded by a true supportive network and love.
But I am not a flamingo. (Well that's a relief ... I guess).
Back to the nurturing mom thing; I have always been patient and caring and kind. I have always wanted children. I feel robbed in a sense. I genuinely believe - if I had a supportive, present, partner, who had a zeal for life and poured love into his kids - well, I would be the nurturing person I know I am (strike that word through), WAS. I mourn for her. I do not think I will ever get her back. She was a good person. She was a good mom. She was a good wife. She was a good friend. She was a good daughter.
I never wanted to pass down this broken/dysfunctional family. This lack of support network.
I often utter "I have a husband, but I don't have a husband" or "I have a sister, mom/dad, brother - but yet I don't have a sister, mom/dad, brother". My grandmother lives less than 30 minutes away - yet I've only really met her less than 10 times. She tells my mother that she feels like no one cares about her. I feel that way. I think my parents feel that way. My sister feels that way. What is this generational curse? I worked tirelessly, for 15+ years, to work on my inward self, my wounded self, my habits and behaviors and to change them. I did, successfully. My husband would never get on board.
He refuses to learn anything new. He refuses to work on himself. He refuses to work on anything - really. That's a topic for another post.
Overall,
It is hard to filter out what is ADHD and what is lack of effort or care. I know internal struggles cannot be seen by others (believe me, I've experienced amany, and continue to do so). I think the difference is that I am comfortable sitting alone. I am comfortable being present. I am willing to self reflect, study, learn, adjust behaviors, take responsibility etc. And even if I do not succeed, I keep trying. It is evident. My efforts can be seen. I talk about it, I care about it, I strive for it, I request participation from my partner (or friends etc) to learn with me etc...
But yet - I remain alone.
I've grown leap years as a person throughout our 17 years of marriage, and well - my husband remains mostly the same. He truly keeps his head buried in the sand like an ostrich. He pretends like things are not happening, if I express how serious something is, he has no urgency and thinks I'm overreacting. He often thinks, "we will deal with it when we cross that bridge" - the thing is, by the time I'm expressing to him any hint of concern, it is something that needs to be addressed and taken care of. When he says "we" will deal with it later, what he means is, YOU will deal with it later. I will put it off and out of mind, and somehow for him things always magically work out. His refusal to participate in activities gives me no choice but to juggle the zillion balls and handle things alone. It feels as if I'm stranded out at sea and he could reach for a life preserver. If only he would look up from his phone.
Do I believe he is a good person? Yes (well, I think). If this were a true scenario, yes, he would throw me a preserver BUT only after he has heard me ask multiple times (or maybe he didn't hear me bc he was zone out on his phone). Only after I have expressed to him how my small dingy was taking on water, to which he would likely respond 'you'll be fine' or 'it's not that bad' or some variation of the implication of "you're overreacting". No sir, you are underreacting.
I'm going to sum this up because I need to get back to my studies. I promised my 7 year old daughter that I would be home in about an hour to take her out on a mini date. I have barely seen my kids over the last month. I am working my ass off to ensure we will be okay (that's a post for a different date).
Signed,
Beyond Exhausted. Fumigated?! There isn't a word to describe how I feel.
dx

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Meanwhile, things had been changing in Xinguo. Although the situation hadn't changed drastically since the early 1550s, there are several important things to take note of. Firstly, North Province Governor Wei Chengjia died of natural causes in 1570 and was succeeded by his son, Wei Yonglong. At forty-seven years of age, Yonglong was more than ready to finally take the reigns of power. He was known to be hot-headed and looking to expand North Province's borders. Bai Guguan, who was eleven years younger than Wei Chengjia, was still governing in the south.
Secondly, the building of forts and outfitting of the Nine Anti-Piracy Expeditions had taken a heavy toll on the finances of the two provinces. To make matters worse, both were now involved in costly wars with hostile native groups on the frontiers.
In the north, the frontier began at a gap in the mountains through which flowed the Pit River. The Pit River was named for the Pit Trappers, a group of two closely-related tribes whose favourite method of hunting deer involved luring them into camouflaged pits, where the hunters could then finish them off. In times of war, the same pits could be adapted for use against humans.
A group of North Province merchants formed the Pit River Society in 1551 to trade with the Pit Trappers. However, in 1569, a series of trade disputes between the Pit River Society and the Pit Trapper tribes culminated in the latter destroying the former's main trading post of Bright Valuables. This kicked off the long and costly Pit River War between North Province and the Pit River Alliance. Wei Yonglong wanted to use the war to expand his borders at the Pit Trappers' expense, but the Pit Trappers knew their country like the backs of their hands. It was heavily forested with a lot of rocky hillsides and waterfalls, making it hard to navigate for large military forces. Additionally, apart from the woodland tracks the Pit Trappers used, there weren't any roads, making resupply a tricky business. Thanks to knowledge of the terrain, clever use of traps, and hit-and-run tactics, the Pit Trappers were able to repel the invasions Wei Yonglong sent their way year after year. That was until the typhoid epidemic of 1580-81 severely depleted the Pit Trapper population. Surrender came in 1583, by which time the Pit Trappers had been nearly destroyed.
At the same time, South Province was engaged in a war far from its own borders in the Red Rock country. Settlement of the lower Red Rock River had begun in the early 1550s. An ever-growing population in the Valley was looking for more places to settle, and the Red Rock country was an appealing destination. Inhabiting the area were a group of related peoples whom the Xinguans collectively called the Cloudy Tribes. The name derives from the Haowei tribe's name for the Red Rock River, “Xawiƚƚ kwii,” or Cloudy River (literally: river cloud).
Bai Guguan began sending envoys to the Cloudy Tribes in 1550 to negotiate the purchase of land for people to settle on. He purchased plots of land at the mouth of the Red Rock and built a fort there to be the springboard for further settlement. A few villages sprouted up in the area. However, negotiation was slow. The Cloudy Tribes were diverse and decentralised. Many were loathe to give up their land. Although they'd heard about the destruction wrought by Xinguan gunpowder and steel from the Valley to the Golden Mountains, the threat seemed very far away to them, and they were sure they could handle anything that came their way in the immediate future.
While negotiations dragged on, Bai sent several exploratory expeditions to map out the region. He then used these maps to draw up preliminary plans for prefectures, counties, and major settlement locations. Negotiations continued to be slow, but Bai took his time, believing there was no need to rush.
In January 1556, the worst earthquake in Chinese history hit Shaanxi province. Beyond being a humanitarian catastrophe, the outcome relevant to Xinguo was that many people decided to seek new lives across the sea. Ningbo, Dongguang, and other coastal cities of Xinguo were flooded with people that summer in an unprecedented immigration wave called the Earthswept Migration. In 1556 and the next few years, at least 100,000 people moved to Xinguo, likely a lot more, since women and girls weren't always registered on the immigration lists. Most of these people were Mandarin-speakers (or Jin-speakers, which is closely related to Mandarin). Neither the northerners nor the southerners were particularly welcoming to the newcomers, with whom they did not share a language, and whom they saw as an unwashed mass of interlopers.
Arriving penniless and with little more than the clothes on their backs, the Earthswept refugees drifted from city to village looking for work and finding little. Some turned to banditry to steal what they could not earn, or were themselves preyed upon by bandits, who sold them into slavery. Crime rates rose and people demanded the governors come up with a solution.
Besides cracking down on banditry, Bai Guguan kicked his plans into overdrive. He published his preliminary prefectural plan as the official settlement plan for the Red Rock country and began selling huge tracts of land in the new prefectures. Those who purchased these tracts divided them into sections and sold them off. Finally, family-sized plots of land were sold at grand auctions held in the public squares of all the major cities and many of the smaller market towns. Earthswept refugees flocked to the auctions, which were publicised well in advance. Since most of them had very little money, they had to buy land on credit extended to them by the landowners.
There were, however, two problems with this plan. First, the Red Rock River was a long way outside the Valley, making it too expensive for penniless refugees to travel there, nor did they have the capital to get a farm up and running once they arrived. Second, negotiations with the Cloudy Tribes were still dragging, so most of the land that Bai had just sold didn't actually belong to him.
The first problem was solved by the provincial government offering low-interest loans to the major landowners, who offered loans in turn to the refugees so they could afford to buy passage to the Red Rock, not to mention tools, seeds, supplies, and livestock for starting a farm. This made them doubly indebted to the landowners.
Meanwhile, Bai Guguan made those same landowners into magistrates of the new prefectures and counties. In fact, they were no mere magistrates, but magnates with near-total social and economic power over the doubly-indebted refugees, who may as well have been their serfs. It was feudalism dressed up as a bureaucracy—the same kind of system already prevalent in the rest of Xinguo, but with fewer checks on the magnates' power.
The second problem was addressed, rather than solved, by selling cheap weapons to the serfs and dramatically increasing the military presence in the region.
All this occurred in less than a year in the latter half of 1556 and the first few months of the next year. By March, 1557, people were already moving to the mouth of the Red Rock River. In the following months, more and more people poured in. Not only did this alleviate the refugee problem, but the Red Rock settlers sent word back to their families in China and thousands more migrants crossed the ocean.
Of course, none of the Cloudy Tribes had been consulted on any of this. The only warning they had was that Bai Guguan did them the courtesy of sending out a wave of envoys to the disparate tribes asking them to reconsider their stances on the sale of land, since settlers were going to be coming soon. Then suddenly, they were hit by what seemed like a tidal wave of newcomers settling on their land without asking permission or begging forgiveness. Reactions were mixed. Some decided to take as good a deal as they could now, before the killing began, and hastily entered negotiations to sell their land. Others became violent. Many a new settler was found tortured to death in his homestead for trespassing. Later, when women and children began arriving, they were either killed alongside the men or kidnapped and enslaved or assimilated into the tribe.
So began the Cloudy War. It was long and brutal, with many atrocities on both sides. There was no formal beginning or end to the war. It began with a rapid escalation to violence in 1557, and slowly wound down in the mid-70s only to flare up again in the early 1580s. Toward the end of the 1580s it slowly wound down as one tribe after another accepted the new situation they found themselves in. It finally came to an end with the last treaty signed with the last free Mahawei band in 1589.
[Next]

Yesterday, I had an argument with a customer about his access point package. Despite my and my coworker’s friendly, reassuring tone, the dipshit felt the need to be sarcastic and demean people who were genuinely trying to help him (as UPS store customers tend to do). I got used to this in my year working there but I suppose this guy in particular really got under my skin. I responded to him in the same sarcastic manner prompting him to try to get around the counter to fight me, but he was stopped by two customers from the line (yeah, there was a line out the door). In the middle of this spectacle our driver arrives with the guy’s package. I ignore his yapping, keep attending to the line, and my coworker hands him his package. Like 5 minutes after he’s gone he’s back right outside the door shouting more insults at me. I ran outside to confront him (poor judgement, I know). We are separated by bystanders and he leaves once again. He then gets in contact with my store owner and they meet at a nearby restaurant. The customer then brandishes his concealed weapon to the owner inside the restaurant and tells him “look what I could’ve done to your boy” (me). The owner comes back, tells me about their meeting, and terminates me. But the most bewildering thing is this; he gives the guy a free mailbox for a year.
I realize I handed the situation poorly. I realize I should’ve been fired. I realize I could’ve been fucking shot. But was the free year really necessary? You would all agree if you met this customer, he’s about as insufferable and nitpicky as it gets. You DO NOT want this guy in particular frequenting your store with a gun, for free no less.
Final tidbit: The guy was back in the store today meeting with the owner again. He took the chance to try and chat with my coworker, telling her a bunch of things she didn’t care to pay attention to, until he pulled out his phone and showed her a picture of him in his security uniform, armed. Then he says “If only I’d been here like this yesterday, what I would’ve done to him”.
Am I the only one who sees how insane this is?

​
What does she even do?
Wow, she can use RCT on others, that's a rare ability, and literally the only thing she can do! Must be very great! Except not bloody really. She can't even regenerate missing body parts, which seems to be a rather basic application of RCT, given even a random fodder sorcerer with exploding teeth could do it.
Did you know Cursed Speech is stored in the arms?
All the top tiers in the verse already have RCT, meaning they can heal themselves far, far better than she can.
But, I hear you ask, what if they're too injured to use RCT on themselves? Well dear reader, they're shit out of luck, cause that's too severe for our dear Nicotine Woman. She can't do a damn thing about that, and it's not like she'll even particularly care.
\"What a shame...\"
Yeah, that's right, the dedicated healer's healing abilities don't work if the target is too injured to deal with them by themselves, great going.
Well, maybe at least she can help less powerful sorcerers if they get their ass kicked too hard? A lower grade sorcerer lost a limb, or got severely injured during a mission, to a point they're not in a fighting shape anymore? Nope, too severe, can't do shit. Hence, why Inumaki and Hana are just completely out of commission (and out of the story). They're not even dead, they didn't suffer any soul damage, they're just, too injured for the only dedicated healer in the verse's abilities to work on them. Good job.
What do you even do, huh? She's alive because of the fucking pudding guy.
Not to mention, her one and only ability can just randomly not work at all, whenever the dreaded Plot Feline strikes.
\"Sometimes it just doesn't work lmao get bent\"
Literally, all she can do is patch up fodder that can't RCT, but only if they aren't injured to a point where they can't fight. Actual, genuine, legal fraud, by definition. No wonder she had to cheat on her medical exams.

I know I’m the A**hole in this story but anyway.
Me (28F) and my current boyfriend (28) have been in a relationship for almost a year now. Couple of months ago my bf calls me up stating that a girl from my instagram following has been texting him for a day or two. She has been sending flirtatious texts to him which he didn’t respond to initially but when she started spewing bullshit about me, he politely asked her to stop and reminded her that he is my boyfriend not a fling. She took that as an opportunity to text further and also sent him a semi naked picture of hers.
When he told me all of this, I immediately knew who it was because she has done this is past with the guys I was going out with. I never did anything about it because none of those guys ever got the opportunity to become my boyfriend and handle my tantrums. Except this time, it was my boyfriend who is a very sweet person and I would like to keep him in my life.
A little background about little miss dumbo. She was in a relationship with my friend(Vik) who I’m not so close with which is why I didn’t think much of it when she texted the other guys I dated. I know Vik through mutual friends and have met him couple of times only.
Coming back to the story I called up my best friend to ask what to do about this situation. Turns out she did the same her too.
It was time that we take this bitch down. I called up Vik and told him the entire story. I did politely ask about their relationship status first before I blabbed the entire story. Turns out they broke up because she was cheating on him with multiple guys. I asked him when they broke up because if she was single while she was texting my past dates, it would not matter that much. But sadly they were in a relationship when she was texting and stalking our dates. They ended a 9 year relationship. Me and my best friend consoled Vik and told him to forget about her.
Fast forward to a week ago. Vik being the fool that he is, forgave her and also told her that I complained about her sending my boyfriend texts. She immediately texted me saying that I’m trying to create unnecessary feud between her and Vik. When i confronted that she did text my bf, she gave me the lame excuse of not knowing who my boyfriend was as she thought he is just another fling and that instagram is a social media platform and she can text whoever she wants to. I reminder her that she has done this in past and yet I never said anything to Vik but this time it was my boyfriend. When she couldn’t prove any point she started spewing bullshit again stating that I’m a whore who sleeps around with men whereas she is in 9 year relationship and I’m just jealous and don’t have guts to face her. I called her immediately, which she disconnected of course stating that she doesn’t have time. I reminded her that it takes less seconds to talk than to text. I swear Common sense is not that common. Enraged she started saying bullshit about my character, work, my accent and my family and upbringing. I had enough. You wanna talk shit about me. Cool. Not my family. I grew up without a mother. I reminded her that I’m not the one who cheated, I have a way better high paying job than her and unlike her I don’t have to lick people’s butt to grow in my field. Also she should be able to understand my accent better since she literally did her undergrads in English communication and yet she can’t speak it properly. I also told her that I won’t demean her parents because I’m sure they did everything possible from their end to provide for her but you can’t fix a defective product. She blocked me after this.
But I wasn’t done because what she said at first was so worse that i can’t even write it here. But just for the gist, she called me a prostitute and that I should be raped.
I screen recorded the entire conversation. Sent it to Vik, posted it online and tagged her. We had a mutual whatsapp group which was created for updates of her birthday last year and I was still a member. I sent the screen recording there as well. When I tell you, so many other women from her circle texted back stating she did the same with their men. I was baffled.
I knew which company she was working at, the HR was my close friend. I sent a copy to them as well along with the texts of the ‎WhatsApp group. I called the HR friend and specifically asked to get her fired somehow. I know this would be unethical but guess what? She wasn’t so great at her job either and took a lot of leaves stating that she was taking care of her boyfriend Vil who supposedly suffers from Osteoporosis. We matched the timeline of her leaves and it didn’t add up as they were separated and my friend doesn’t have any disease. She got fired the very next day. The last time I saw her, I was waving her goodbye from the HR office.

This topic has been done a lot so this post is nothing special at all, but I figured I might as well do one. As a disclaimer, this is just my personal thoughts and ideas and is 100% not final nor will they happen, this is just for fun. This also might be a long post.
These are Pokemon I feel deserve a Regional Form, Regional form evolution or even Cross-Gen Evolution to make them stand out or even make them more powerful. These forms I'm listing are by Gens and are based on aspects of the Kalos Region, real life France or even its Mythology that could help create the Regional Forms of the Region. Plus, I decided to give my ideas for what the Starters could be and their final evo's Regional form (even if it's going to be pretty obvious for the Grass and Water, not so much for Fire, that one was hard)
A quick honorable mention would be Dachsbun, a very good boy who debuted SV so it's not going to be in Legends which is a shame because a baguette, croissant or some other French bread Regional form or Evolution of Dachbun sounds good. I could imagine the evolution being Fairy/Fire (for it's references to its Ability and it looks like baked bread) or Fairy/Ground (due to wheat coming from the ground) and those type combos haven't been done yet so hopefully LZA can fill those different combos up.
Another honorable mention is Charcadet as it could have a similar scenario to Eevee and have it's evolutions be of different types and based on different weaponry but it's an SV mon so sadly, it can't be the case.
Another disclaimer is that I'm not the best at explaining things but again, it's more like a brainstorm and not really serious
Starters:

• Serperior (Grass/Steel): Snivy and Piplup are pretty obvious for the Starters so here are my ideas for their Regional Forms. The Gen V Starters according to Ken Sugimori are based Western, Chinese (Emboar) and Japanese (Samurott) cultures with Serperior being based on Western royalty in places like Europe and is one of the few or only Pokemon based on a Manga character, Lady Oscar from Rose of Versaiise (set in during the French Revolution) and French kings like King Louis XIV.
  • My idea for this form is to take their Lady Oscar inspiration (who practiced Fencing), swordfighting, knights and Fencers to make this Serperior Grass/Steel, I tried to avoid the Fighting type because I wanted these 3 Starters to not use repeated types (Steel has been used once for Empoleon) of the past and focus on unused or rarely used types.
  • This line focuses on slash-based attacks and their stats which were Defensive and Speed based are more focused on Offense and speed. Their Hidden Ability I imagine is Sharpness and their signature move I could see being in line with Psycho Cut, Leaf Blade and Aqua Cutter being a crit-based Steel type slash move.
• Cinderace (Fire/Electric): Remember how I said the Grass and Water Starters were easy to choose and the Fire one isn't? Yeah, the Fire Starter was hard to choose because while Snivy and Piplup are based on royalty, Scorbunny has no distinction. When it came to the Fire Starters, Chimchar and Tepig were out of the picture due to Piplup and Snivy being there, Charmander and Torchic were also out since their evos have Megas, I've seen people say Torchic is the starter due to Roosters being the national animal of France but it and it's fellow Hoenn Starters have Megas and Mega Blaziken debuted in XY through a Mystery Gift when XY started so I don't see Torchic being the case and Fuecoco debuted in SV so that's off limits.
  • This left Scorbunny and Litten and Litten does have some French cat stories like the White Cat and the Mythological Matagot which takes on multiple forms other than cats but I couldn't really think of something for Incineroar so I went with Scorbunny because of it's Futbol (or Soccer) inspirations and FIFA being in France, not the main reason but I thought oh well.
  • It was then I thought about how I made Seperior to be a swordsman, a traditional knight of sorts and it gave me the idea that the first stages are based on royalty (aside from Scorbunny) but their final evolutions could be influenced by types of military/knight forces, swordsman for Seperior, line infantry for Cinderace and commander (or just Napoleon for Empoleon's case)/gunman/cannon person for Empoleon.
  • This Cinderace won't have a gun for a line infantry man but instead rushes to battle to take care of the opposing line quickly for the others to fight against the other army, so I chose Electric to represent that quickness. It's Hidden Ability could be Reckless since the line infantry's attacks can sometimes be reckless or a new ability related to it's signature move I call 'Iron Leg' that boosts Leg/Kick moves. It's Electric signature move is similar to Tachyon Cutter or Dragon Darts where it could kick the opponent twice possibly leaving them paralyzed.
  • As for it's stats? I don't think they change too much from the original, but I'd say in exchange for it's 75 DEF/SP.DEF going lower by 10 points, it becomes a bit faster and offensively strong (although 126 ATK and 129 SPE would be pretty insane, not too insane but I could see those aforementioned stat changes going to HP or something like that)
• Empoleon (WateIce): Napoleon, I think that's all I need to say... I'm just kidding, I'll keep going. I love Empoleon, Piplup was my first Starter but I always thought Empoleon's design looked like it would be a physical attacker with the blades and had Defiant until Gen IX so for this Empoleon, it would be a Physical attacker with it's SPA and SPD swapped with ATK and DEF and it would focus on cannon and 'gun' based attacks.
  • I imagine one of 2 Abilities for this Empoleon, Defiant, an Ability regular Empoleon had until SV or an Ability focused on Ball, Bomb and Cannon moves. It's Ice signature move I'm not sure of, maybe similar to Armarouge's Armor Cannon where it lowers DEF and SPD?

With the Starters done, here are the various ideas I had for various Regional forms, evolutions, etc that will never happen but it's for fun.
Dragons (because I had a lot of Dragon ideas)

• Druddigon (and an evo, Dragon/Rock): This idea I had for a Fakemon Region Dex based on Australia/New Zealand, but I thought this idea could work here as well. My idea for this Druddigon goes with its gargoyle inspiration where it becomes Dragon/Rock or has an evolution that becomes Dragon/Rock. This evolution I call Gargogon (another disclaimer, I'm terrible with names, from Gargoyle, Dragon and Don) where it embraces the gargoyle design and become something more intimidating maybe an ability relating to this aspect or having Intimidate as a Hidden Ability.
• Turtonator Regional or evo (Fire/Dragon or Steel/Dragon): I feel bad for Turtonator, no one talks about it and it's only notable for being a part of Kiawe's team in the Anime and I really liked Turtonator there, so I decided to give Turtonator some love. My idea is an evo based on the Tarasque, a type of turtle, dragon with a lion's head. What if this Pokemon evolved to be more protective of itself and appear more intimidating to others. It would keep the Fire/Dragon type but considering it's preevo would be able to use Eviolite with it's huge 136 DEF and it's good 85 SPD, I could make it as a Steel/Dragon regional form instead.
• Drampa Regional or evo (Dragon/Normal or Dragon/Fairy): I also decided to give Turtonator's counterpart some love as well, they would be based on another French Dragon the Guivre, a dragon who is said to spout a venomous breath. Ironically though, I could see this being Dragon/Fairy due to Drampa's mystical like appearance (and we need a regular Dragon/Fairy Pokemon since it's locked behind Mega Altaria) or keeping it's original Dragon/Normal type.
• Dragapult (Dragon/Water): The Regional Form Psuedo of the Gen similar to Goodra, I did a post talking about Regional Psuedos and Dragapult came to mind because I love Dragapult. My idea is related to Dreepy's Dex entry stating it was an aquatic Pokemon long ago. I wish it could've been a Paradox Pokemon to see what it could've looked like but Regional could work as well.
  • I say Regional but my idea here is what if there was a certain group of the Dreepy line that survived its original extinction and live their days within the canals of Lumiose trying not to die.
• Kommo'o (last Dragon I promise, Dragon/Ghost): This idea more fits with the Johto Region due to it's origins but I thought I'd mention it here. Kommo'o is based on monks with it's tail resembling a staff that monk's use. But something in my head made me think of another type of monk, an Onmyoji and Onmyodo from Japan. In many stories and even Manga/Anime for instance, they control spirits or the world to the otherside so what if Kommo'o was able to do a similar thing and contact spirits hence it's Ghost type. This concept again fits more with Johto than Kalos but I thought it could be interesting.
  
• Non-Dragons:
  
  • Convergent Gengar line (Dark): SV introduced the concept of Convergents, Pokemon that look like another Pokemon but aren't related and so I feel future games might introduce more Convergents so I decided to do one for the Gengar line based on the Beast of Gevaudan, a beast that wanders through the forests of France and is a man-eater. Convergent Gastly is a fuzzball, Convergent Haunter has small hidden legs and Convergent Gengar is a round wolf thing. I know Gengar has a Mega (and a GMAX) so Gengar would get more attention but well... I'm not sure what to say. This Pokemon would roam the streets of Lumiose.
  • Pidove line (Fairy/Flying): This line would be based on Pouters (a type of rock pigeon) and fancy pigeons, these are pigeons which have weird proportions (look up a Pygmy Pouter, they look very weird) such as freakishly long legs and puffed up necks that make it look like they can't breathe. What if these Pidoves were bred to look 'fancy' and ended up looking strange even gaining Fairy-like power in this state.
  • Electivire line (Electric/Ice): I love the Electivire line, so I decided to give it love. Electivire is based on an Oni but also yetis and bigfoot so what if this line was in the frosty forest above Dendemille Town who adapted to the harsh cold and gained icy abilities. This one wouldn't work in context of the game since it's set within Lumiose City and not the whole Region so this is one where it can't work but oh well.
  • Mandibuzz (Ghost/Flying): Since Braviary got a Regional form in Legends Arceus, I figured I'd give it's counterpart Mandibuzz a form based on the Grim Reaper or in this universe, how people see the reaper, a Kalosian Mandibuzz with a deathly look that peers within your soul.
  • Roserade (Grass/Ghost): This Roserade is based on Nightshades, a type of poisonous flower or any flower representing death.
  • Thievul evo (Dark): Thievul is based on gentleman thieves but could also have inspirations from Arsene Lupin by Maurice Leblanc, a French author so I think Thievul would fit very well in Kalos but there's also another story about a trickster fox named Reynard the Fox. I could see Thievul having an evo here that takes aspects from the story.
  • Torkoal (Water or WateFire): This one is pretty simple, a Torkoal based on a geyser, think of a semi-Volcanion based on cauldrons and geysers of boiling hot water. I'd imagine a signature Ability where it makes its Water moves have a chance of burning the target.
  • Magmortar line (Water or WateFire): Similar to Electivire, Magmortar is based on an Oni but it's also based on a bird called a Booby (yes, that's it's name) so what if this Magmortar adapted to the waters of Cyllage and became more aquatic. Again, this likely wouldn't work for the same reasons as Electivire (set in Lumiose) but it's a fun thought.
  • Gligar and a Regional Evo/or regional Gliscor (Ground/Poison: Last one for today. Gligar is my little guy and Gliscor is cool so what if it gained a Regional form based on desert scorpions like the yellow-tailed scorpion. These Gligar and evo stride through the ground using their stingers to stun their prey. Since it's not gliding, I imagine it would be an evo I call Striscor due to it striding along the sands.

And that's it for now, I know this post is huge and it's been done already but I thought I could give my personal thoughts on what could be in LZA. Let me know what you think and I hope these random ideas sound intresting.

When I was 22, at work, a man jumped the counter and held a knife at my throat demanding the police. The police came, he stabbed me 4 tines in the neck and head before being shot dead by a police woman.
I have a lot of trust issues and I have suffered with my mental health in the past. But I am or was doing okay until something happened with 2 people I lived with. One moved out and I am now struggling with paranoia that the one left is fucking with me and trying to hurt me.
I don't have the money to move out and my family and friends all think that I am just being paranoid... I feel like I am back there, scared for my life and nobody believes me, not sure if I believe myself and I am just on the verge of another psychotic episode.
I have sought medical help and awaiting referrals but I was also admitted to hospital last week because I could not stop vomiting and had acute diarrhoea, I told the doctors I think I may be being slowly poisoned, she kind of laughed and said that murder by poisoning is very rare these days.
I feel scared, I notice every little thing in my body. I threw out all of my food and I am losing weight and I think my mind also...
I received a weird call with this girl just giggling at me and a very expensive diamond ring of mine went missing earlier this week, it was in my room.
I don't know what to do until I can afford to move, I have told as many people as I can about it, hoping that if it is true and I die, hopefully justice will be served. If I am wrong, then I fear for my mental health, I feel so lonely and scared at times.
I don't know what to do. How can I know if I am being poisoned or if there is a hit out for me. How do I know what is real? Everyone around me is saying that I sound crazy and there's a part of me that thinks this too, but my gut, is telling me that something is off...

Hey everyone. My (32m) roommate (38m) and I got priced out of Park Slope and relocated to Washington Heights earlier this year. It’s cool, much different and reminds me of “South Slope” down in the 50s, but one thing I noticed is these Spanish women do not age.
I noticed one lady with an amazing figure with a youngster like 5 years old who was getting off the A train. I walked along side her and then heard the kid call her “abuela” — I thought she was the mom! I looked at her face for like 30 seconds and I would’ve said early thirties but I looked at her hands and guessed late 50s…
I’ve been going to a restaurant that sells “mofongo” this kind of food that’s name I thought was a swear word. The waitress there is gorgeous and suggested I try the “arrows cone poyo” that had a lot of orange rice and chicken and you can’t find outside of that one restaurant. I have six Presidente beers and talked to the waitress lady all night in Spanglish. I made a move and we ended up back at my place and ended up hooking up.
What first gave me pause was the mesh bra and tan “granny” style panty that she wore to the top of her abdomen. It was pretty hot but when I looked at her the next morning, she went from like 38 to 62. It turns out she was 71 but honest to god she looked great. She had one of those “Jitterbug” and said “omgah 22 miss call from Giancarlo,” who turned out to be her boyfriend who’s jacked and pitches for a local softball team. Now I can’t go there anymore and Gian is now coming by building a lot with some guys I see playing dominoes by the small park.
My roommate told the group chat of our friends, one that I’m not in for some reason, and two of them just blocked me. One dude sees me and says in a playful animated voice, “what’s up you mother… I mean GRAND mother fucker…” and it’s been very embarrassing.
So I guess I’m self conscious now that about my white cis het male gaze and wonder what I should do about it…

So Alexander Hamilton is one of the founders of America. He lived from 1755 to 1804. There is a bit of a debate about when he was actually born (wich year, the date is January 14, no debate about that really) The most popular belief is that he was born in 1757, he himself always used January 14. 1755 as official date of birth. He was born on an Island in the Caribbean, wich at that point, was a british colony, making him an immigrant in America. His parents were not married, at that time that made him a bastard, making his life harder. There was also a lot of drama with the love life of his mother, im not gonna talk about that here and now tho.
He went to a Jewish school in the Caribbean and also learned french from his mother, making him fluent in french and english. Then his mother died from the yellow fever if i remember correctly. With that, he and his brother were orphaned, since their father left when hamilton was around 11 years old. After a long hard time without inheriting anything and not having a place to live, they moved in with they’re older cousin. A few months after that, their cousins committed you aliven’t. So then their uncle took them in. A month after that… their uncle passed away as well. Hamiltons brother then left to attend an apprenticeship as a carpenter. Hamilton mover in with a family friend, where he was in good hands. Then a hurricane destroyed their town. This was traumatic for Hamilton so he wrote a letter to his dad, with whom he was still in contact for some reason. That letter was discovered tho and the Island people thought it was so good that he just had to go to New york. (They probably wanted him to become a successful doctor and then return to the island, wich he didn’t) The ship he was on for months to get to New York also caught on fire on their way.
In New York he had a bit of trouble finding the right collage, he ended up in Kings collage tho. Wich actually was in a building connected to a brothel and the sexworkers where strictly prohibited from the school grounds or the areas close to that.
He then went to war (the American revolutionary war) under the command of George Washington. He met a lot of interesting people (although he did not meet all of them at war) one of them was John Laurens
Together they wrote essays against slavery. A subject John was pationet about. His plan was to emancipate 1000 men by setting up the first all black battalion. Sadly that plan failed. Hamilton and Laurens also wrote highly suggestiv letters to each other. (Their relationship was probably not purely platonic)
He also met La Fayette, who i‘d love to talk about but my phone is starting to lag to i’ll have to end this. Thanks for reading if you did :)

But yeah the loss and grief just makes me scared and sad. Idk what to say idk what to do, this takes a toll on me man. Don’t get me wrong I’m not a nihilist by any means. In fact I’m usually stubbornly optimistic. But I just don’t know. Things are better but only in the sense that I’m breaking even. It’s not unbearably bad but it’s not really good either. I’m just…im just surviving. I sometimes get like really motivated and I get a fire in my belly and do something about my life. And try to have goals and be happy again.
But then something happens to shit on my parade. I really struggle with my mental health issues and my family want me to keep applying for ssdi so I can have some income and more stability. They mean well God bless them. But I’m torn, cause I think I should maybe be on disability too but at the same time I feel like if I can maybe be healed somehow shouldn’t I try to work?
I’m only 30 dude, human beings need the grind, we need pressure to refine us. We need goals to work towards. And I’m feeling passionate today but I’m just…scraping by. If my ten old year old dreamer me met my current me. He’d probably kick me in the ass and call me a loser. People aren’t sposed to be this way. I’m worried I might be living one of my worst fears. Stagnation. God help me.

Lately, I’ve been rereading Batman Year One & Batman the long Halloween and I just can't but want a comic series on the rise of the mob families in Gotham mainly Carmine and the Falcone Crime family rise to prominence?
Considering how the mob families were the precursors to the super villains and how powerful they were by the time of Batman Year One. I think it would be cool to cover the rise of the mob families like The Falcones and The Maronis and how they came to power and their war in Gotham prior to Batman and Gordon.
Either make it a full graphic novel, limited or even maxiseries and titled it either “The Family Falcone.” or ''The Roman.'' or even something like ''Rise of the Roman.'' since the story would take place before Year One and Long Halloween thus making it a prequel to the entire Batman Mythos of sorts what do think about that?
My main inspiration would be not by a comic but one of my personal favorite novels Star Wars: Darth Plagueis where not only it is a book about the relationship of Plagueis and Palpatine but also serve as a tapestry of EU references so this series should be something similar to this being a tapestry of Batman mythos like Year One and other beloved/legendary works.
Besides developing Carmine as a young man and his father Vincent there would be also a expansion focus on the Falcone-Maroni War like developing more of Sal Maroni's fahter Luigi showing him in his prime as well as showing the moment where he almost kill Carmine to the point that Vincent ask Thomas Wayne to save his son essentially a retelling of that flashback scene from Long Halloween. Speaking of which other then Thomas Wayne which would this series would delve how he become enter a business partnership with Vincent Falcone most of the wayne family involvement of the story like Young Bruce Wayne would be minimal.
Granted the only downside for making this series telling Carmine rise to power would be all the gotham curses, court of owls, and other additions to the Batman lore these days it'd be interesting if they kept it separate or looped those aspects in.
If I was a writer I could try to keep it in canon or at first make it an elseworld story laying the groundwork for future comics kinda like how the Killing Joke was at first considered an elseworld story but it was so beloved that to the point that DC made it canon. I think the same could happened with this story?Besides incorporating maybe the court of owls either as full or just cameos what other characters would incorporated to connected the greater universe like with the Star Wars Novel Darth Plagueis is the tapestry of the EU or just said a general crime drama set in Gotham before Batman either before Bruce's born or during his childhood but before the murder of the waynes.
In addition of returning characters like say Arnold Flass and Commissioner Loeb especially learning more about how the latter how he become commissioner and being part of Falcone payroll before gordon arrival at gotham. I think the biggest one would have to be the Court of Owls.
The Falcone Crime family is supposed to be an expansive organization that controls much of Gotham. Yet we now have yet another expansive organization that is actually pulling the strings behind Gotham. Was Falcone aware of this other organization? Did he operate under them or in spite of them?
The interaction of building a criminal empire under the watch of an even larger criminal organization would be an interesting story. Otherwise I'd be good a story with just the general crime drama tropes set in Gotham.
Regardless outside of using Darth Plagueis as a foundation or the main inspiration for this story what are other inspirations would you use to make this story for an example Frank Miller use the film Taxi Driver for Year One while Loeb use the film the godfather for Long Halloween.) as well as added some connections with other batman stories like not just The Court of Owls, but also the classics like Year One, Long Halloween, Catwoman in Italy, and Dark Victory?
Also if you were a writer or editor at the editor at DC comics would you have it be a full graphic novel, or mini/limited series or even a maxi series and what new ideas or additions in the story would you add for not just this Rise of Falcone family and Carmine becoming the most powerfully crime boss in gotham but also for the Batman mythos? Finally how would you portrayed the characters like young Carmine and his father Vincent Falcone as well as the Maronis like Luigi and Sal?

Did I just fuck up or dodge a bullet? 25F matched with 32M on Bumble and wondering who is in the wrong. Me (25F) matched with this really great guy (32M) on bumble 2 weeks ago. We had a few phone calls, exchanged a lot of texts and were planning on meeting up this week (the reason we didn't meet up sooner was due to schedule conflicts and me traveling). Everything was going great, we were texting pretty regularly but nothing crazy, he was very complimentary and telling me how beautiful I was and how lucky he was to match with me, and talking about how he is so excited to get off the app (personally I thought he was coming on a little strong but chalked it up to him being a romantic), until one day the texts completely stopped. For a full week I heard nothing from him and he went completely ghost on me, so after a week of nothing I texted him and said ME 25F: "Could've at least let me know you weren't interested instead of ghosting me Imao" and then a few hours later I get a response 32M- "ummm I wasn't ghosting you, I had a family emergency and work wasn't ideal this week so l'm sorry, that's not a very nice way to reach out to someone you barely know, I'm sorry to disappoint, take care"
SO MY QUESTION IS: AITA for sending him that text because now I feel bad, but also my thought process is, it takes 2 seconds to send a text and explain what's going on, plus I didn't think my response mean, maybe just a little sassy. Would love to he your opinion on the matter and who you think is in the wrong here.

Hi guys, I have an update for you guys about the whole situation. Thank you for all the comments and messages and advice that I received.
I know a lot of people in the comments told me to break up with him. But I didn’t think that was right. So after getting some advice from guys that we’re in similar positions. I asked him to come over so we could talk.
Firstly I made it clear that I really do love him, And I apologised to him, I apologised for not taking into consideration how intimate he felt kissing was. In my eyes it was a fake kiss but it wasn’t to him, so when i was talking about it, he felt I was disregarding his feelings.
I changed how I spoke and I told him that it wouldn’t be Me and the boy kissing, it would be romeo and Juliet. But I also made it clear that him asking me for an ultimatum was not fair. If he feels like he has to give me one now, what’s the point in us staying to together after high school if there’s no trust?
after I finished talking, he apologised to me and said that he was talking to some of his friends hand they got into his head, that he should feel insecure about the whole thing. when he was gone for 18 hours he was with them. he was also with them when he gave me the ultimatum.
he later realised he was in the wrong when he talked to his older sister. We both understood that insecurity within the relationship is something we needed to work on.
He also apologised for making me feel like i had to make a choice between things that I love. he understood is was wrong and unsupportive of him.
At first I thought that it would be best that we went on a break, but after some advice from someone and his girlfriend, It probably wasn’t the best with the fact this was rooted around insecurity it would probably just made the relationship end completely.
so with the weeks left before the performance, I’m going to spend all time i’m not studying with him. Since we are now done with school. we are still going to prom together!! which i am very excited about 😊
But I have also accepted that by the time my show happens, if he feels that he can’t come I will understand.
Thank you to everyone’s advice. because we’re young fights are going to happen, and it just about taking a step back and actually seeing if it can be fixed or not!

Long post
I finished uni a year ago studying a bachelors degree that was design and programming as well. So I did studio subjects like UX, UI, product design, data visualisation, web design, JavaScript coding, animation stuff like that pretty in demand stuff when I was studying it and there was heaps of jobs and a big demand for UX. I also did designathons assisted with PhD research in VR and more research. I worked hard and got high grades and ended up getting a strong portfolio together which my mentor currently said is better than some designers he knows. The only problem now is that the job market is terrible due to tech layoffs and no one is hiring due to a bad economy and over saturation of UX designers from boot camps.
I did have a final interview the other day for a large company that had over 1000 applicants for the role and I was one on the six to make it to the final round but sadly they hired other people because I lacked experience even though it was entry level and I was told to do an internship instead because they said it’s fast paced and think I’d struggle but they never seen me work and I don’t want an internship I want a job I’m nearly 25. Why does entry level need experience they said in the email they’ll teach you on the job. But I guess I’m alright to make it to the final six out of 1000 while only two were hired.
But there are no other jobs idk what to do, all the jobs are mid to senior level. It’s been a year and it looks like I’ll never get a job. I’ve applied for smaller jobs but didn’t even hear back.
So my life’s been a loop for the past year I get up walk my puppy then scroll on my phone all day. I have a mentor who’s given me a list to do to help but I haven’t even done that I feel like it’s pointless. I haven’t exercised in months or done any of my hobbies I just scroll on my phone in my room all day. I don’t even have the energy to place video games or eat normally my diet has gone to crap I barely even brush my teeth anymore.
I’m also feeling like a complete failure I’ve never been in a relationship at 24 and don’t have a career started yet. I’m so ugly I made a post on Reddit for plastic surgery but people said I don’t need it but I can’t believe them I feel like they’re lying trying to be nice and say my face isn’t asymmetrical when I was told I’m a 3/10 and need facial reconstruction surgery. I don’t want to go outside because I’m so ugly and deformed unlike everyone else. Someone called me an incel because I hate my face so much I wanted to die and self harm. What does that have to do with women that’s mean and hurts my feelings I’d never hate women. I don’t even want to do anything at all when I know I’m hideous
My parents are mad at me and say all I do is scroll on my phone and I should go back to uni and study something else or work in data entry or retail stocking shelves. People on Reddit said I should give up and I did a bullshit degree but they’re pretty in demand skills just the market sucks. I know a girl who’s been struggling for nearly 2 years. I’ve been to psychologists but none have been good one nearly fell asleep, one made weird assumptions and one dismissed my problems and said I have different problems. Only my psychiatrist helps
But I don’t feel depressed like I use to. Maybe burnt out and a bit disheartened that I worked so hard for nothing and been told to give up.
I currently have a part time job but that’s about it
Sorry for the long post but I’ve wasted a year pretty much in my bed on my phone. What can I do to fix it my family is mad at me for doing nothing and it’s not like I don’t want to do this. I’m 24 and so far behind in life my younger brothers friends have careers and travel. Am I lazy like they say or is there something wrong with me how to I find motivation to live again. My brothers are doing better than me with gfs and careers while I’m living at home with no future because of the job market
My laptop broke so I bought a MacBook Air but not getting it until next week so hopefully that helps
Sorry for the long post and if I sound whiny I’m just tired and struggling to improve no one’s helped only bend angry at me and making threats like threatening to financially drain me or kick me out because I’ve been struggling. I’m on medication been on it for years but now I’m in a slump i struggle to get out of. I can’t even surf anymore and I live near the beach. And I quit the gym I got a eating disorder from it so I don’t wanna go back
My puppy is all I have right now that’s keeping me active. I literally do nothing it’s almost midnight my sleep schedule is screwed and I haven’t even read a book in like a year I’m just so unmotivated by anything I don’t exercise, don’t eat well, don’t do hobbies, barley have energy to apply for jobs now I can’t do anything but my parents say I’m lazy which I probably am I guess but I never was lazy . I’m ugly and don’t have a career yet which I want, I want to start my life already
I have a lot of free time I should be enjoying it but I want a job
I’ve wasted my 20s

Hi- I’m currently driving a 2007 honda pilot & about to go to college and looking into civics.
A big feature that I really want in my civic is the built in carplay because currently i have an external one in my car and I USE IT SO MUCH but its hard to reach since its not built in. I know this requires an EX+ model and 2016+ as well.
I think my family wants me to get something under 50k miles however I don’t see anything wrong with getting anything as long as its under 80k as its a honda/ my pilot has 200,000 miles on it.
My budget after selling the pilot will likely be between 13-16k. Is this realistic & what tips do you guys have? Is it worth it to get the LX model and just install an aftermarket radio that has carplay? Is honda sensing THAT worth it? What other features would I miss out on if I got an LX model?

When I began prepping for this adventure, I wrestled a lot with the concept of Khulkor Zhul, it's ideology and what Azarr Khul's motive was. I didn't want to simply have them as "bad guys who want to rule the world", but for them to have a clear ideology that (while extreme for some) could make sense in some way. And so I searched, I posted here, I read books and heard songs, all in the name of discovering my villains' essence.
I've been running RHoD for many many months now (scheduling conflicts and such), with only bits and pieces of ideology and motive here and there. -After suffering all these millennia being called monsters, hunted down and burnt to the stake, the creatures of Khulkor Zhul want to get revenge on the humans and the "civilised" races. Azarr Khul leads them as a Messiah who seeks to prove that the true monsters are the humans who continuously fight amongst themselves, drawing blood over land and profit. -The Mother (Tiamat) is an ancient deity of Chaos from whom all "monsters" come from. Khulkor Zhul worships her and considers Azarr Khul as her chosen who will lead them to liberation and salvation. -The Mother also symbolises creation and birth. Some view this as a cancerous neverending growth of life. Others claim that the Red Hand wants to release hell from crystalline prison and destroy the balance of the universe. There also those who believe that while this may be a world-ending event, it is part of the cosmos and we should accept this change the same way we accept day changing into the night.
Today, two of the player characters were captured and brought in front of Ulwai. She decided to talk to them and see if she can get them to join the Hand's side since she suspected they knew of the fate of the Ghost lord's phylactery. During their conversation, the Red Hand's motive became clear as a whole, both to me and my players:
"To end this world and bring upon a new one, a better one. A world where the so called monsters may live with their bellies full and with family around them. Where everyone would be welcomed and accepted. Who would be better to symbolise such a world if not for the Mother, the personification of change, birth and life. But the greater the change one desires, the greater must be the applied force to change direction. Tell me, if your perfect world was an arm's reach away, would you not try to reach it? Even if it was with a bloodied Red Hand?"
Of course, while this may be the view of many of the more sophisticated members of the People of the Dragon, the majority is still made up of bloodthirsty warriors who view this war not as means of change, but only as revenge on the civilised races. Azarr Khul is no full though and gladly cultivates this hatred. Wars after all are won by soldiers not philosophers.
Tldr; while most soldiers are made into religious fanatics of the Mother(Tiamat) that seek only to destroy the civilised races, the true purpose of the Khulkor Zhul is to create a world where the "monsters" and everyone else can live in peace. They claim that the Mother, as goddess of Chaos, Birth and Life, is their patron in this holy quest. The Red Hand became their heraldry since one must be able to reach for such a holy purpose, even if it is done by a hand bathed in blood. Azarr Khul will destroy the Vale with his fanatics in order to rebuild it as he sees fit.

Yeah! I'm just being honest. So I've been dating this guy for six months now, and it's been kind of a good relationship so far. We met a few years ago when quarantine was still up and we were taking online classes. It was my first year at university and his name popped up in zoom. His name kinda called my attention but we never really talked. I had a boyfriend at the time so i wasnt interested in talking to him either. My ex and i broke up in 2022, 4 year old relationship. We we're SO in love but i had to deal with my own problems at the time. It was so hard but i had to for my own good. in 2023 this guy (My current boyfriend) started replying to some of My insta stories. I think i caught his interest because i also played videogames. I thought he was kinda cute, so he caught my attention too. One day he told me to go out, and so we did. I kinda knew he had money, he took me to this expensive restaurant i never went before. It was great, he was charming, we had a Lot of things i'm common. I loved it. We kept going out for the rest of our winter vacation, we kissed after a few dates. I kinda felt myself falling for him little bit. Things changed when we got back to class. He stopped replying to my texts, stopped looking for me, we stopped going out... To me everything was so confusing, i didn't know what could i had possibly done to loose his interest. I got hurt, i remember crying a little bit about it. I had never felt so rejected. After a while i decided to stop pursuing his attention, stopped uploading stories for him to see them, stopped texting him. I wasnt really expecting him to do anything about it, but tocmy surprise he did. He started looking for me again and even took me to his friend's house. I didnt quite know what was going on, but to make it quick, we ended up having sex that same night. I don't know if it was a mistake or not, but after bottling my feelings for so long i finally managed to tell him i liked him. He said he did too and hugged me. It was sweet.
Our dates got more serious after that, and after a month he asked me to be his girlfriend. When we were finally together, i slowly got to know him more. I understood that he never wanted to hurt me, he was just scared of having a relationship and didnt know what to do. (He apologized about it) I also got to know more of his story, his friends and secret hobbies he has. He is a very sweet boy.
The thing is, after a while, i noticed i started loosing feelings. I don't know how or exactly why, but i started noticing his flaws more and more. I liked how he treated me and the experiences i had with him, but i didn't like him, not as a boyfriend. It was hurtful because he is actually auch a nice guy, i really do not want to hurt him at all. The feeling of guilt kept growing because the more time it passed, the more i felt i was lying to his face.
I tried breaking up with him once. When it happened i was going through an anxiety and depression episode (im diagnosed with it since i'm 13) that was triggered by another few things that were happening i'm my life. I was honest with him, told him how i felt, and added the fact that i could no longer stand the fact that this situation could possibly hurt him. But he refused. He said we could work on it together, that he could be better, he said that if he gave me a lot of love i would be happy again.
But that never happened. It's been months now and this feeling keeps feeling like to much to bear. I really just want this to end. As sweet as he is, sometimes i just had a long day and i wanna rest. But the person who is supposed to be my confort zone isnt really helping. I feel so bad about it, but the lack of connection makes me wanna scream. I try to be supportive and loving to him, and it's not that i don't want to be like that for him, but i care more of him as a friend than as a couple. I don't even know how to explain this properly, but im feeling worse every single day and My heart breaks to this feeling. I feel like the worse person in the world. I just don't know how to be honest with him and tell him its not working. I can't look at him in the eyes and tell him i don't love him anymore. I'm such a coward. I really don't know where to get the strength to just say it, i don't want to shatter his heart.
But i don't think i can keep this up much longer either. That was it, i had to let it out. I'm sorry.

I started on 5mg once a day for four days, then on 5mg 2x a day 2 weeks tomorrow. My problem is depression from the two main intrusive thoughts; passive ideations about myself and my little one; also because of a divorce. Also eating is almost impossible.
Taking my daughter to school and picking her up and working is all I can do.
What has been odd is that even though I was devastated about the divorce, I found a way to coparent for five years. However what I think is behind everything is I'm 52 years old, and it took me a while to successfully change careers, and because of that, I don't have much of a 401(k). It's really just the pressures of all the expenses and things you have to worry about as you grow older. Also in the end what I'd love is someone who is going to be in the trenches with you till the end.
What is also peculiar is for years while I have suffered from intrusive thoughts they revolved around anxiety, health anxiety and panic attacks. (Kind of like your garden variety anxiety) I have never had SI in my life. OCD regarding hurting others, at best was like fleeting and knew they would go away. I've been depressed before sure, but never like this. I guess when I'm saying is this is very unprecedented for me. I am a very kind and affable and good natured, humble guy; So essentially these thoughts are really destroying me.
The irony is I was trying to start Prozac (March 22nd) to stop the panic attacks and my general anxiety. And then after three days, insomnia kicked in and the ideations at 1,000,000% and pretty much everything else. However, I think something else was a foot. I am suspecting that the unhappiness and realization about how I didn't acquire the model family life was underneath all of this.
In the beginning, I thought the ideations were from like a blackbox affect some SSI can have. I was obsessed with looking into the Prozac thread to find out all information that I could. Hoping that the ideations would just go away on their own. But they have not.
Essentially, I would just like to hear from others who might be in a similar situation or who have been able to push through it or continuing to battle presently. Be well, my friends and fellow human beings. I hope you are well and OK.