I recently found an old blackberry curve 9330 and I was wondering what all I could do with it. I know I can’t do much due to BB shutting down, but is there anything at all that can be done with this thing? Any help is appreciated.

So ive just dug out my old 9900 (a product of recently watching the Blackberry movie and getting all sentimental) I have the Blackberry id popup happening, I think I hit the correct password but its not progressing. I know that the BBid server is no longer, does this mean I can not get into this phone any longer? I have Z10 Z30 9000 and curve that I can at least open with the bbid thing popping up. Any tips would be most welcome. Would love it to be a weekender for calls and txt but also would love to read old txt threads. TIA

Earth's orbit experiences an “Orbital Eccentricity”, 100,000 year cycle orbit and inclination variation, going from circular to elliptical, the hemispheres experience more or less sun or exposure to the sun for extended periods, causing ice ages. Scientists estimate we are near the minimum, a 6% change in solar energy. At peak, the earth experiences a change of 30%.
Modern Day Primates, in the wild and captivity, are able to communicate, near and far, using verbal and gesture components, even to other species. Have been observed using wood as tools, and in using medicinal plants to treat wounds.
44 million y a - Hominid ancestors acquire Herpes virus.
10 million y a - Primate ancestors develop genes to digest alcohol.
6 million years ago - Primate ancestors split from Chimpanzee/Bonobo line (15 million DNA mutations have occurred since then; each person born today has 100 mutations distinct to them, most don’t survive.)
5.3 m y a - Mediterranean Sea experiences the Messinian Salinity Crisis, for 600,000 years the Straight of Gibraltar closed off, causing the Mediterranean to shrink down to two inland seas with Italy and Greece separating them. Ends in the Zanclean Flood, a river of Atlantic sea water flows thru Gibraltar and fills the Mediterranean in 2 years.
5 m y a - Arabian-African continent reconnects with Asia. Land based Turtle species start going extinct.
4 - 3 m y a - Hominid ancestors acquire pubic lice from Gorillas (genetic evidence).
3.6 - 2.58 m y a - Considered the Neogene Period.
3.3 m y a - Stone tools found in Kenya and Ethiopia.
2.6 m y a - Mode One Stone Tools found in Ethiopia, would subsequently spread. Flourished to 1.7 million y a in southern and eastern Africa. Paleolithic (Old Stone Age) Era (2.6 m y a till end of last Ice Age, 11,000 y a). Subdivided into the Early- or Lower Paleolithic (c. 2,6 million years ago - c. 250,000 years ago); the Middle Paleolithic (c. 250,000 years ago - c. 30,000 years ago); and the Late- or Upper Paleolithic (c. 50,000/40,000 - c. 10,000 years ago)
2.58 million - 11,700 years ago - Considered the start of the Quaternary Period, and covers the Pleistocene.
2.4 – 1.4 m y a – Homo Habilis (4.5-3.5 feet tall).
2 m years ago - Earliest Hominids start eating meat.
1.9 – 1.8 m y a – Homo Rudolfensis.
1.89 m y a to 110,000 y a - Homo Erectus (first to leave Africa and spread across Asia).
1.8 m years ago - Mode One Stone Tools found on Java.
1.7 m years ago - Mode Two Stone Tools (slicing, hand-axe/butchering, evidence of drilling tools) appear in Kenya and southern Africa.
1.6 m years ago - Mode One Stone Tools found in northern China.
1.6 - 1.5 m y a - Africa, Turkana Boy dies, likely from a tooth cavity infection. He was either 8 or 11-12 years old and 61 inches tall. Brain 880 ccm.
1.5 m y a - Kenya, possible start of Hominids using fire to cook food. (increase in caloric intake, which would lead to evolution; however, Paranthropus Boisei is the local species, brain 500-550 ccm, 54 inches tall)
1 million years ago - Likely split between ancestor of Homo Sapiens and proto-Neanderthal-Denisovan species. (Mitochondrial DNA evidence.) South Africa, evidence of fire use for cooking.
1 m - 700,000 y a - Java, Java Man dies, brain 900 ccm. 5' 8" tall.
900,000 y a – Possible earliest use of boats.
820,000 - 580,000 y a - Durum Wheat develops out of natural hybridization with Einkorn Wheat (genetic analysis).
800,000? y a - Low world temperatures recorded. Height of Ice Age?
790,000 y a - Levant, oldest Fire hearths found. (Homo Heidelbergensis, 1,250 ccm brain, 69 in tall)
740,000? y a - Height of Ice Age?
7-200,000 y a – Homo Heidelbergensis (East Africa and Europe, likely first to hunt large animals with spears)
640,000? y a - Height of Ice Age.
550,000? y a - Height of Ice Age?
540,000 - 430,000 y a - Art: Sea shell formed into decoration by Homo Erectus. (Could indicate when sea shells began to be used as whistles and horns.)
530,000? y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, high CO2 content in the atmosphere, 524-474,000).
500,000 y a - South Africa, evidence of Spears. Genetic evidence of Neanderthal spread from Europe to Caspian Sea, Denisovans occupied land from Caspian to the east.
450,000 y a - Earliest physical evidence of Neanderthal.
450,000 y a - Global temperatures had dropped, stayed that way for thousands of years.
430,000 - 230,000 y a - Durum Wheat cross-breeds with wild Goat Grass (genetic analysis).
400,000 y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, 424-374,000).
400,000 y a - Germany, oldest Spears found. France (Terra Amata), possible evidence of manmade shelter using prepared wood.
360,000? y a - Height of Ice Age.
335-236,000 y a – Homo Naledi (South Africa, 4’9”)
310,000 y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, 337-300,000).
300,000 y a – Mode Three Stone Tools (smaller knife-like, scrapers, developed in Europe by Neanderthals)
300,000-200,000 y a – Africa, Origin of Male Y-Chromosome that all current males are descended from. (40% of males do not reproduce.)
270,000? y a - Height of Ice Age.
240,000 y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, 242–230,000).
200,000 y a - France, evidence of Neanderthals fishing. Africa, "Mitochondrial Eve," source of all Human Haplo-groups that everyone is descended from, existed at this time.
194,000-135,000 y a - Penultimate Glacial Period.
190,000 y a - Early physical evidence of Denisovans. (At least three interbreeding events would occur with Homo Sapiens. EPAS1 gene, hemoglobin concentration, Tibetan plateau.)
190,000-50,000 y a - Flores Island, evidence of tool use by the Human Hobbit.
170,000 - 80,000 y a - Body Lice evolve (genetic evidence, feed on human skin, live in clothing; evidence of clothing)
164,000 y a – South Africa, heat treating Silcrete Stone to enhance stone tool production.
140,000 y a - Homo Sapiens found in Europe.
130,000 y a - Evidence of humans in North America. Crete, earliest human settlements found on the island. Art: Neanderthal necklace made of eagle talons. Croatia: Neanderthal teeth show possible dental work.
125,000 y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, 130-115,000). Sea levels 4-6 meters (18 feet) higher then today.
110,000-15,000 y a - Last Glacial Period. Grey Wolves would migrate from North America back to Asia prior to the maximum.
100,000-60,000 y a - Flores Island, bone fossil evidence of the Human Hobbit.
100,000 y a - Oldest example of proper human burial. South Africa, Pigment (paint) Creation Kit found. (would cover bodies in mud/clay and then spray the paint over the bodies, sun screen-protection from insects)
90,000 y a – Harpoons.
86,000-37,000 y a – Neanderthal and Homo Sapiens begin interbreeding, based on genetic evidence found so far.
75,000 years ago - Likely rise of Hunter Genotype in Homo Sapiens.
75,000 y a - Art: Drilled snail shells found in South African cave.
73,000 y a - South Africa (Blombos Cave), evidence of Red Ochre art on pieces of stone, stone with deliberate lines cut into it possibly representing count marks.
72,000 y a - South Africa, Beads found in cave.
70,000 y a - Mitochondrial DNA suggests this is when the Haplo-group of early humans migrated out of Africa to populate the rest of the world.
70-60,000 y a - Earliest evidence of bone and stone arrowheads (for Spear Throwers), found in South Africa. 64,000?
70,000 - 35,000 BCE - Neanderthal burials in Europe and Middle East.
68-16,000 y a – Smallpox evolves from an African Rodent Virus.
67,000 BCE - France, burial shows skulls with Trepanation (cutting holes to relieve brain pressure), earliest example of surgery.
65,000 y a - First humans settle Australia.
64,000 y a - Spain, oldest evidence found of Cave Art (Neanderthal hand).
61,000 y a - South Africa, possible evidence of a Sewing Needle.
60,000? y a - Height of Ice Age?
60,000 y a - Evidence of man/Neanderthal using herbal medicine.
55,000 - 40,000 y a - Italy, evidence of Neanderthal using Pine Tree Resin and Beeswax for hafting tools, in cave. (Beeswax can be used in making Candles.)
52,000 y a - Last evidence of Denisovans.
52,000 – 41,000 y a – Archaeological find of “Bast” tree fiber twisted into primitive cordage, possibly as handle for a Stone Tool. (meaning they had access to Clothing, Nets, Cord for Fishing or Hafting tools, rope; thinking processes of Counting, Sets, Patterns, and possibly abstract thinking)
50,000 - 10,000 y a - Mode Four Stone Tools (long blades).
50,000 y a - Australia, last evidence of megafauna. Siberia, needle made from bone found in Denisovan cave. Genetic evidence of Neanderthal spreading to western edge of China.
50,000 years ago - End point of development of Gatherer Genotype (can survive famine), Teacher Genotype (can handle new and different environments, analytical).
45,000 y a - Evidence of Neanderthal and Homo Sapien interbreeding. (Fossil found, DNA tested.) (France, to create stone tools required precision, “Soft Hammers” were likely used.)
44,000 y a - Evidence of art found in Indonesia.
44,000-40,000 y a - Europe experiences cold and dry weather, displacing populations.
43-42,000 y a - Germany, oldest musical instruments (flutes) found.
42,000 y a - Australia, skeleton of man suggests Atlatl use, pre-dating earliest evidence; earliest example of cremation found. Spain, small amounts of Natural Gold found in a cave.
40,000 y a - (Mankind is at the “Forager” level.) Last evidence of Neanderthal. (Inheritance of "STAT2" gene, immune response. HYAL2 gene, helps skin recover from sunburns.) China, test on body found that ate a lot of fresh water fish. Possible example of oldest petroglyphs. Beads found in Lebanon.
40,000 - 26,000 y a - Studying toe bones, showed they became smaller and weaker, indicating shoes were worn. Prior to this, shoes were likely bags wrapped around feet to protect from cold.
38,000 BC - First appearance of Mode Five Ground Stone tools on Japan. (rock was quarried; thin slivers of flint stone, attached to hafts, man is learning the use of a "handle" for tools and "leverage", create Adzes, Celts, and Axes; grinding helps to penetrate trees and was likely discovered when grinding plant matter; found buried with owners; were traded) Lasted till 14,000 BC. (Would not become popular elsewhere until 10,000 BC?) Germany: Clay Figurine featuring human with lion like appearance, thought to be earliest representation of a Deity.
35,000 BCE - Europe, earliest examples of "Venus figurines" found buried in graves (some showing they were deliberately broken or stabbed repeatedly); would later spread to rest of Eurasia. Early examples of skulls and long bones showing red ochre, indicating possible relic worship.
35,000 y a - Germany, flute made from a vulture bone found.
30,000 BCE – Solomon Islands, first humans settle (60 km sea voyage).
31,000 - 27,000 y a - Evidence of Pit Fire (Earthernware) Pottery developing.
30,000-20,000 years ago - Explorer genotype (Ice Age refugees, idiosyncratic, asymmetrical, contrarian mentality)
30,000 y a - Evidence of starch residue on rocks, indicating where plant matter was pounded and ground. (Would likely be the pre-cursor of developing bread from roots of cattails and ferns. Quern Grinding Stones would spread and gain popularity.) Georgia, Flax used as a textile (harvested, dyed, and knotted) found in Dzudzuana Cave. Fertile Crescent, Einkorn wheat harvested in it's wild form. Evidence of man using the Atlatl. Poland: Boomerang carved from mammoth tusk found. France, Lunar Calendar. Likely when Bolas (stone weight(s) and length of cord) began to be used.
28,000 y a - Europe, oldest evidence of rope.
25,000 - 15,000 BCE - Blood Type A develops in the Fertile Crescent. (able to survive Plague, Cholera, Smallpox)
27,000 y a - Australia, oldest example of petroglyphs found. Czech Republic, earliest example of "Weaving" of material together to create baskets and basic cloth. (Leads to counting and simple math, organizing.)
26,000-13,300 y a - Considered "Glacial Maximum", ice sheets extend to the 45th parallel north. (26,500 considered to be maximum glacial reach.)
23,000 - 12,000 y a – Europe, Perforated Batons found, made of antler, assumed to be a form of Atlatl that uses a leather strap or string to wrap around the spear and give it a slight spin, arrow or spear thrower (similar to Swiss Arrow). Right and left handed throwers find preference. Most carved with Horses, have one or two holes (one had 8 holes).
23,000 y a - Israel, Ohalo archaeological site, hunter-gatherer society (6 brushwood shelters, 132 stone tools some attached to hafts, stone Sickles, dwellings showed flint tools were made at entrance, cooking at other end, grind stone showed sand and cobbles to place and had U-shape of seeds around it) that grew/harvested Barley, Millet, Bromus (grass in same tax tribe as wheat/barley/rye, can be used for fermenting beverages, can be eaten by humans and animals), Rubus (same family as Rose plants, similar to blackberries), and various fruits (seeds from 13 different species), earliest evidence for “Bedding” material.
22,000 – 17,000 y a – France, Solutrean inhabitants make use of Antler.
21,000-17,000 y a - France, Atlatl's found in caves.
20,000 y a - Height of the Ice Age, sea levels 120 meters (360 feet) lower. Mode Five Stone Tools (microliths glued to handles, Fertile Crescent). Earliest example of a building/house found. Ukraine, Bullroarer (wood on rope that is swung around to create sound over long distance) found. Iraq-Iran, Zarzian Culture, had domesticated Dogs.
19,050? - 13,050 y a - Oldest Dryas Period, stadial, abrupt cooling period. Sea levels rose 10-15 m in 500 years.
17,000 BCE - Mesopotamia, Wild Emmer Wheat harvested.
18,000 - 17,500 y a - Siberia, earliest example of a domesticated dog found frozen. Germany, Bow and Arrows found. Early evidence of Darts used.
18,000 y a - Japan, oldest pottery discovered.
15,100 - 14,000 y a - Morocco, earliest example of a cemetery.
15,000 y a – Mode Five Stone Tools reach Europe. Southern France, cave art depicting possible Musical Bow, Nose Flute; "The Sorcerer," a figure showing human and many animal qualities (bison), made out of Clay.
15,000 – 10,000 y a – France, Stone Oil Lamps.
14,500 y a - Oldest example of bread making, Jordan desert.
14,160 - 13,820 y a - Archaeological find: infected tooth partially cleaned out with flint tools.
14,600 - 13,600 y a - "Melt Water Pulse," sea levels rose 16-24 m.
14,000? y a - Older Dryas Period, around 200 year cooling period.
13,500 - 8,200 y a - China, wild Rice domestication event occurs.
15-10,000 BCE - Himalayas, development of Blood Type B.
11,050 BCE - Syria, attempts at domesticating Rye.
13,000 y a - Greece, evidence of lentils found. Earliest evidence of Amber used in jewelry. Israel, archaeological evidence of beer like gruel for ceremonial purposes found at Haifa. Likely beginning of Slavery.
13,000 - 12,700 y a - Fertile Crescent, archaeological evidence of man corralling and using pigs.
12,900 - 11,700 y a - The Younger Dryas Period, when temperatures went cold instead of warming from the Last Glacial Maximum.
10,000 BCE - Jericho, considered mankind's first town, is established. Buildings of clay and straw, dead buried under homes. (Would reach 70 dwellings by 94,000 BCE.) Chickpeas domesticated. Earliest evidence of the Bottle Gourd being domesticated and used (Africa and Asia variety). Azerbaijan (Caspian Sea), petroglyphs of reed boats. Starting point of Ocarina type flutes. Cyprus, humans arrive. Germany, Jet artifact (Botfly larvae, which can be eaten). Curved Stone Oil Lamps.
11,700 y a - Considered the beginning of the Holocene.
9600 BCE - Southern Levant, earliest use of wild Emmer Wheat.
11,500 - 11,000 y a - "Melt Water Pulse," sea levels rose 28 m.
11,400 y a - Cypress, archaeological evidence of pigs (indicating they had been domesticated and brought from the mainland).
9400 - 9200 BCE - Jordan Valley, Fig trees found, indicating earliest agriculture since these trees could not reproduce.
9130 - 7370 BCE - SE Turkey, Gobekli Tepe, oldest known worship location.
9000 BCE - Syria, oldest (Saddle) Quern found. Mesopotamia, Copper first used. Bartering of Cattle and agricultural products likely occurring at this time.
9000 - 3300 BCE - Neolithic Era, roughly. Time period of when man has begun herding, before using bronze.
11,000 - 9,000 y a - Mesopotamia, domestication of Sheep; Rammed Earth construction technique developed. Iran, Domestication of Goat (focused on management of the animal, varieties would come later).
11,000-4,000 years ago - Warrior genotype (farmers, soldiers, inventors); Nomad genotype (life upon a horse, can handle different environments, good immune system)
11 or 10,000 y a - Last Ice Age ends.
8800 BCE - Emmer Wheat spreads beyond the Levant.
8700 BCE - Iraq, Copper pendant.
8500 BCE - Domestication of Barley. Domestication of peas occurs around this time. Turkey, Beer production found at Gobekli Tepe. Domestication of Cattle from the Aurochs (two separate populations, one in Mesopotamia [pop. 80], the other Pakistan). (Rendering cattle bones into Tallow allows for the creation of Candles. Beeswax also used.) Oregon, oldest pair of shoes found made from bark twine. Oats possibly start to be harvested, crop mirrors wheat (is like a weed).
8400 BCE – Cyprus, earliest dug Water Well (26 ft).
10,300 - 8,700 y a - China, Millet harvested.
10,200 - 9,500 y a - Emmer Wheat domesticated(?).
10,000 - 7,000 y a - Archaeological evidence of boats.
8000 BCE (10,000 years ago) – Genetic evidence of breeding Pigeons. Palestine, archaeological evidence of pastoralism. Pre-Pottery Neolithic people in the Fertile Crescent form perfectly smooth stone vases. Iran, Goat domestication. Believed to be when primitive dairy-cheese making began. Flax cultivation. China, Quern Grinding Stones. England, Antler used in headdress costume.
9,500 y a - Cyprus, earliest evidence of cat domestication. SE Anatolia, cold-working, annealing, smelting, lost wax casting of Copper.
7570 BCE – Indus Valley, Lapis Lazuli artifacts.
7500 - 5700 BCE - Anatolia, Catal Hoyuk develops as a spiritual center, found many clay figurines and impressions (feminine, phallic, hunting).
7400 BCE - A monolith ends up submerged in the Straight of Sicily.
7176 B.C. – Earth hit by one of the most massive Solar Storms from the sun ever recorded (visible at night with the magnetic field interaction).
7000 BCE - Archaeological evidence for pastoralism in Africa. China: evidence of mead (honey, rice, water fermented) in pottery; evidence of musical instruments. India, first archaeological evidence of Dance (cave art); evidence of dentistry. Armenian Highlands, art depictions of Cymbals. Durum Wheat made thru artificial selection in Europe and Near East. Greece, earliest evidence of grain silos. Turkey, Catal Hoyuk, art depiction of a Slinger. Afghanistan, Lapis Lazuli mined and traded to Indus and Mesopotamia societies. Europe, Cave Wall art of Honey Collecting.
7000 - 6600 BCE - China, domestication of Soy beans.
7000 - 6000 BCE - Turkey, domestication of Bitter Vetch. (Too bitter for human consumption without being boiled several times, has been found to be great for cattle feed.)
6500-3800 BCE - Ubaid Period (Mesopotamian citystates rise, evidence of specialized workers, evidence of taxation)
6500 BCE - Turkey, evidence of lead smelting at Catal Hoyuk. (Wrapping the dead in textiles, too.) China, archaeological evidence of Silk. Kosovo, oldest Ocarina found in Europe.
8,200 - 7,600 y a - Sea levels rise rapidly. Linked to North American great fresh water lake (Agassiz, Ojibway) sudden draining into Atlantic Ocean. 8,400 y a?
6050 BCE - Moldova, evidence of man extracting salt from a natural spring.
8,000 y a - Western Europe, white skin first appears. Iran: earliest evidence of irrigation; man starts choosing sheep for their wooliness, not just meat and skin (2-3,000 years later, would start wearing wool). Georgia, earliest evidence of wine. Spain, cave painting shows people collecting honey from a wild hive, using a container to hold. China, Buckwheat cultivated (near Tibetan plateau), possible first example of Influenza. Earliest evidence of the Ard Plow used (castrating bulls to train 4 years to become Draft Oxen, also means they can be used to haul logs thru and from forests). Mediterranean, Broad (Fava) Beans, Broccoli. Portugal: Almendres Cromlech, begins, aligned to equinox and solstice, occupied for 2,000 years, would become largest complex in Iberian peninsula, equal to other large complexes in Europe. Anatolia: Obsidian polished into mirrors. Spelt Wheat appears. First Stone hafted Axes. Earliest evidence of “Cock Fighting” game fowl. (Iraq, Kiln.)
6000 - 3500 BC - Mesopotamia (Sumer), Poppy domesticated.
7,8-5,000 y a - SE Turkey, Einkorn Wheat grown and domesticated.
5600 BCE - Evidence of The Black Sea Flood, turning the fresh water lake into a salt water sea, rose shorelines and displaced populations (source of flood myths in religions).
7500 y a - Earth experiences a cold climate period? Lasts for 500 or more years.
7500 y a - Earliest example of chickpeas being used. Poland, archaeological evidence of cheese making. Ukraine, Romania, earliest examples of traps used for hunting. Pakistan, evidence of Cotton found in copper beads. Egypt, earliest Combs found (placing a leaf in the teeth can create a primitive sound instrument).
5500-5000 BCE - Serbia, Copper Smelting.
5200 - 4700 BCE - Iran, earliest evidence of a wheel, for pottery, made of stone or clay.
7,000 y a - Earliest example of Dolmen, single chamber tomb, consists of two stones supporting another on top (table design), found in western Europe, would spread and be common 4000 - 3000 BCE in Europe. Iranian plateau, evidence of Bronze made with naturally occurring arsenic. Tin would replace as the major ingredient (and releasing non-toxic vapors) in the late 3000 BCE period. Iran, evidence of wine found, using sealed containers. China, Hemp domestication (smoking was likely cause for spread, Iron Age would use for production); Rammed Earth construction technique, Silkworm domestication begins. Egypt, Badarian culture starts farming, used boomerangs. Roundels, circular enclosure often with entrances aligned to solstice, would be constructed in Central Europe (Germany, 120-150 altogether). Siberia, oldest carpet found (likely a funeral gift, from Armenia, featured griffons). Mesopotamia: first use of Stamp Seals for government purposes; Rotary Quern milling stones are introduced. Armenia: possible origin of Apricots. Lake Zurich, cultivation of Pear. Indus Valley Civilization, using Bitumen aka Asphalt for waterproofing (a basket), adhesive. Bulgaria, Turquoise beads.
6950 - 6440 y a - Papua New Guinea, cultivation of Taro and Yam.
4800 BCE - Egypt, early evidence of peas being grown. Cairn of Barnenez, Brittany, England, begins (burial monument and later bronze age use, considered one of the oldest and largest man made structures).
4700 - 4200 BCE - The town of Solnitstata, considered the oldest known settlement in Europe. Built around a salt deposit.
6,500 y a - Croatia, earliest example of an oven found. Slovenia, dental filling made with beeswax. Indus Valley, irrigation. Wine production reaches Greece. Carnac Stones, Brittany, France; would become large complex of standing stones, menhirs, domens, tumuli (burial mounds, with passage tombs), large rectangle formed by stone. Americas: various tribes domesticated “chili peppers.” Bulgaria, Carnelian beads. Manufactured Red Pottery Oil Lamps.
4500-4000 BCE - China, Investment Casting develops.
4200 - 4000 BCE - Mesopotamia develops true, easy to spin pottery wheels.
6,000 y a - Earth experiences a cold climate period? (Starting maybe 500 years earlier and ending 500 years later.)
4000 BCE - (Mankind has achieved “Farmer status.”) (Thought to be when Cattle were turned into Oxen for Draft Animal purposes.) Egyptians start building big Brick structures; manufacturing Papyrus; Gold artifacts; (domesticated Donkeys?). Earliest examples of Kilns. NE Italy, archaeological find of Appleseeds. Sicily, evidence of wine found. Ukraine, Kazakhstan, Horse domestication begins (they became small and varied in size as compared to their wild ancestors). “Pontic Language Explosion”. [People from north of the Caspian and Black Seas migrated around Eurasia, ancestor of western languages. (shared origins with: milk, horses, sheep, cattle, pigs, goats, grain, copper, carts, yoke, weaving, mead; patrilineal clans)]. Earliest examples of Viticulture (wine making). Levant, earliest examples of harvesting Olives; start using grain Silos. Art: Earliest depiction of Shoes, Sandals. China: example of a Loom for Silk production; Ramie (similar to flax, requires chemical processing, not as popular, believed to be used for Egyptian mummy wraps). Persia (Iran), Mung Bean domestication?, Chang (precursor to Harp) found on artwork, made with sheep guts. Mesopotamia: Stamp Seals come into use; Mirrors made of Copper; 30-40% of animal bones in settlements were pork (understood to be a way of removing trash from community, easy to feed and raise many); Uruk clay tablet describes two temples owning a herd of 95 pigs to be rendered into soap to clean linen; clay pipes for sewage. Europe, farming reaches northern regions. Anatolia, Silver production.
4000 - 1000 BCE - Ethiopia, Teff is discovered (can feed people and livestock, building material).
3800 - 3500 BCE - Czech Republic, possible evidence of earliest plowed fields.
5,700 y a - Lolland Island, a blue eyed, dark haired, dark skin woman spits out some Birch Bark gum; oldest complete human genome extracted; had Mononucleosis ("kissing disease"). Possible archeological evidence of pit traps used for migrating animal hunting.
3630 BCE - Oldest example of silk fabric found.
3600 BCE – Pork bones in settlements (Levant, Mesopotamia) dropped to 16-30% of total livestock.
5,500 - 4,700 y a - Georgia, tomb found had honey remains on pottery. (This culture could identify Linden, Berry, and Meadow-Flower varieties.)
3500 BCE - City of Uruk: (Mesopotamia) begins outward expansion and influence, later first example of organized warfare (would influence Egyptians to start building pyramids); "Cylinder Seals," a type of noble seal, that can be rolled unto wet clay (would be popular until 1000 BCE). Iraq, Kish Tablet, considered to represent the early transition from pictographic to cuneiform. Mesopotamia, earliest Harps and Lyres found; Gold artifacts. Modern humans settle the western coast of Europe, hunter-gatherers. Egyptians show Cat domestication; Gold Smelting; used a vertical Gnomon as a primitive Sundial? Iran, Beer made from Barley. Armenia, earliest Leather Shoe found. China, Pottery in shape of silkworm indicates earliest example of Sericulture (silk worm production).
3500 - 3350 BCE – Mesopotamia, earliest evidence of wheeled vehicles. Indus Valley civilization uses Stamp Seals with a type of script.
3400 BCE (5,400 years ago) - First metal casting. France, Cow skull showing Trepanation found.
5,400 -5,100 y a - Itzi the Iceman dies in the mountains of Northern Italy. Had a copper axe. Earliest evidence of tattoos. Shoes made from two types of animal skin (bear and deer). Arsenic residue in his hair.
3300 BCE - Egypt, tomb paintings show people Dancing. Indus Valley, develop Sanitation.
3200 BCE - Examples of using symbols to represent real life objects (would go to form written language). Ireland, construction begins on Newgrange, largest passage tomb in Europe, aligned to winter solstice. Egypt, Bead made of Meteoric Iron found.
3100 - 2900 BCE - Jemdet Nasr period (following fall of Uruk) would be known as establishing Cuneiform as a proper language.
3100 BCE - Upper and Lower Egypt unified. Mesopotamia, likely evidence of the earliest Lute type device.
3000 BCE - Onset of Bronze. Mesopotamia, Irrigation; Glass Beads appear (possible side effect of making metal); possible earliest Iron working (required higher temperatures), cuneiform mention of Pigeons. Sumer, Medical text found on tablet, believed oldest ever found. Egypt, Hieroglyphs of Pigeons and use of Homing Pigeons for message delivery, first record of a Doctor named, Imhotep; Antimony harvested from rock and made into eye makeup; earliest evidence of domestic Donkeys in the south. Egyptian Mummies show evidence of Smallpox (deathrate 30% especially among babies, can leave people blind). Dromedary Camels likely domesticated in Somalia at this time. (Camel hair can be harvested for shelter and clothing, outer guard hairs make for water proof coats. Camel milk readily turns into yogurt. To turn into butter requires a clarifying agent and extended process.) Chicken reaches Europe from Asia. England, earliest Stone Circles found. Slovakia, Romania, earliest chainmail found. Sheep chosen for wooly coat, not long hair. China, Clay Bells found. India, River Buffalo domesticated (water buffalo); Jute grown for fiber (burlap). Northern Iran, earliest examples of Trumpets. SE Asia, earliest records of Radish. Pakistan, Terracota female figurines.
2800 BCE - Solid evidence of plowed fields. China, Copper smelting discovered. Babylon, evidence of manufacture of soap like substance.
2700 BCE - Chinese treatise on health. 40 kinds identified.
2650 BCE - Egypt, dental work found.
2630-10 BCE - Egypt, Pyramid of Djoser constructed by Imhotep, considered first.
2600 BCE – Egypt, domestication of Honey Bee complete.
2600 - 1900 BCE - Indus Valley, Stoneware Pottery (meaning fired at 1000 degrees Celsius), would become a major industry; (Ivory?).
2580-50 BCE – Egypt, creates first true Ocean Dock for sea trading vessels (with Indus Valley).
2560 BCE - Great Pyramid of Giza completed.
2500 BCE - Evidence of The Amber Road, trade route from the Baltic Sea to Mediterranean Sea. E Iran, Bactrian Camels domesticated. Iraq, "Lyres of Ur," considered world's oldest stringed instruments. Peru, oldest Sling ever found. Egypt, earliest depiction of a Khopesh (sword). Sumerian Clay Tablet with instructions for manufacturing soap (heating mixture of oil and wood ash, earliest record chemical reaction, used for washing woolen clothing). China, axes with Corundum (precious stone). Harappan Culture of Indus Valley, chicken used for Cock Fighting, not food.
2500 - 2000 BCE - Mali, domestication of Pearl Millet. Turkey, Meteoric Iron dagger.
2400 BCE - Sumer, description of Prostitution and a Brothel-Temple to Fertility Goddess.
2300 BCE - Mesopotamia, Urukagina of Lagash, considered the earliest Law Code. (Widows and orphans exempt from taxes, state pays for funeral expenses, the rich must pay in silver and cannot force the poor against will, checked power of priests, protect from usury, abolished polyandry). Iran, Quince (fruit). China, oldest Gnomon (painted stick that casts a shadow for sundial purpose).
2200 BCE - China, first known tax, using salt. Iraq, tablet reads “22 jars of Pig Fat” (each jar 18 liters of Lard, 396 liters total, require 45 adult pigs; likely used to make soap to clean wool of sheep before turning them into textiles)
2200-2000 BCE - Turkey, Iron Smelting.
2100 - 2050 BCE - City of Ur: Earliest written Code of Law discovered. References Butter. (Fines for bodily harm, references murder, robbery, adultery, rape. Two classes of people: free and slave.)
4000 - 3000 y a - Mesopotamia, earliest Scissors (shear, spring type). India, Mung Bean domesticated.
2000 BCE - Murals show horses pulling chariots. Horses become common in western Europe. England, Great Orme Mine started, would become largest copper mine in region (most productive between 1700 - 1400 BCE), used bone and stone tools. China, Bells made out of metal (Bellfounding); domestication of the Swamp Buffalo (water buffalo). Ghana, earliest evidence of Cowpea (black eyed pea). India, Canola/Rapeseed; Diamonds being used to drill beads. Egypt, Lupin Beans. Greece, Kale grown.
1900 BCE – Homing Pigeons used for warfare.
1800 BCE - Egypt, medical text on gynecological issues; Safflower for pigment. India, Iron working.
1754 BCE - Code of Hammurabi (recognized Prostitution and gave women protection and inheritance; theorized that a fertility goddess had a temple that offered sex workers).
1700 - 1200 BCE - (Late Bronze Age) 8 societies in Middle East: Aegean, Egyptian, Hittite, Canaanite, Cypriot, Mitanni, Assyrian, Babylonian. Considered a "globalized world system." Next time this would occur is today.
1700 BCE – Mesopotamia: The "Mari Letters" reference Minoan society, King Hammurabi; clay tablets list Trigonometry Tables and Applied Geometry (for land ownership, speculated to aid in construction).
1628 BCE - Island of Thera/Santorini experiences huge volcanic eruption, possibly causing a tsunami thru eastern Mediterranean.
1600-1500 BCE - Greece, Helmet formed of boar tusks found.
1600 BCE – Levant, Mesopotamia, Pork bones rarely found in settlements (banned from temples in Anatolia, Mesopotamia, Egypt). (Found amongst the poor classes, difficult to tax since it did not produce wool or milk or could plow a field.)
1550 BCE – Papyrus Ebers, Egyptian medical text, mentions Chlamydia.
1500 BCE - Modern Trumpet design found in eastern Mediterranean. India, Pigeon Pea domesticated. Egypt, Mercury found in tombs; archaeologists find earliest Sundials; Emerald mines. China, Water Clocks.
1400 BCE - Syria, Hurrian Songs, cuneiform music tablet in Ugarit. Greece, oldest body armor found, made of bronze, Dendra Panoply (not actually worn, more of a showpiece, but clear representation of body armor for battle). China, Meteoric Iron axeheads. Art representation of Scale Mail in Egypt. Art: representation of Shields.
1350 BCE - Turkey, Hittites chronicle Egyptian prisoners of war bringing "the plague.”
1300 BCE - Uluburun Shipwreck, off coast of Turkey, had 300 sixty pound copper ingots (10 tons), 1 ton of tin, and tin objects and ingots of colored glass (blue, rose, brown). From Cypress/Minoa.
1300? - 900? BCE - Eastern Mediterranean experiences a 300? year drought. (Could also be: Cypress 1200- 850. Syria 1250-1187. Galilee 1250-1100)
1279 BCE - Battle of Qadesh (Egypt vs Hittites).
1200 BCE (3,200 years ago) - Onset of Iron smelting. Earliest Camel saddles appear. Last appearance of Megaliths. India, earliest evidence of Firewalking.
1200 BCE - Eastern Mediterranean civilization collapse. Drought in Greece. Earthquake series.
1188-1177 BCE - Egypt suffers invasions from "The Sea People."
1185 BCE - Syria, Ugarit Letter, Famine.
1140? BCE - Ramses 6th, mummy found to have Smallpox. No record of people dying from Smallpox.
1100 BCE - Phoenicians establish nation. Europe, Iron Age.
1100? BCE - Earth experiences a cold temperature period?
1100-750 BCE - Egypt, Iron Smelting.
1070 BCE - Egyptian mummy found with Silk in hair, earliest evidence of Silk Road.
1000 BCE - Early Cuneiform script (late stages, still pictograph in nature). Bactria, Barbat (primitive lute). Egypt, Kenaf is grown for fibers, leaves can be eaten by animals and humans (similar to Jute and Hemp; rope, rough fabric, sails). Mediterranean, Cabbage domesticated. China, Iron Age. Sport: racing Homing Pigeons.
930 BCE - Camel bones found in Arabian peninsula. Jordan, earliest Bloomery for Iron working found.
800 - 600 BCE - Ethiopia, Sorghum Wheat begins to be harvested.
800 BCE - Considered the beginning of Ancient Greece, after the Mycenae Civilization. China, Bloomeries used.
700-500 BCE - The Illiad orally composed. India, Diamond mining starts.
708 BCE – Greece, Olympics, Discus Throw.
700 BCE - Turkey, first Coins in Lydia. Assyria, first equipment recognized as a Saddle for a Horse.
660 BCE – Massive Solar Storm hits Earth.
600 BCE - Earliest example of a Steel Sword.
600-400 BCE - Ancient Greece rise of scientific inquiry and philosophy
550 BCE - The Illiad written down.
540 BCE – Sri Lanka, earliest record of Pearls.
500 BCE - Camels used in warfare. Persians use kettle drums for military maneuvers, frighten enemies. Greece, Grape Syrup, early form of sweetener and preservative; earliest written mention of what could be Influenza. Blackberries consumed around Europe. Spain, Disk Quern developed. India, Cholera described in Sanskrit. Romans manufacture dipped Candles.
430 BCE – Athens, Typhoid Fever outbreak during siege by Sparta.
400 BCE - The "Celts/Gaeil" settle Ireland. Greece, the “Hippocratic Corpus” seventy collected medical texts, mentions Pneumonia, Meningitis, Valerian Root.
396 BCE - Olympics, horn blowing competitions.
314 BCE - China, first mention of Sweet Orange.
298 BCE - Foot powered Loom.
200 BCE - China starts making paper.

I remember in my 20s... I saved up $25 for 15 months straight to afford my 1st smartphone(blackberry curve). I took pride in not going into debt.
I churned credit cards for the bonus money. Opened checking accounts solely for the $200 direct deposit bonus.
Agressively saved all my money. My mentality was that i had all the time in the world. Why rush?
My mindset back then was "why be an early adopter?? Prices always fall". "If I cant pay cash, then I can't afford it" , "wow,, the bar is a waste of money..i can save tons by drinking at home!!, im not a sucker"!
I felt so smart and ahead of all the sheep.
But now in my 30s...i feel like time is shorter these days. If I want something ,I get it right away. Ill sit at the bar and leave a big tip. Who cares if the latest smartphone will be 1/2 off a year or two after release ?
Soon..ill be in my 40s.... I can get A dehabilitating disease and all the money im my bank account wont even matter.
I surprised myself with this mindset shift. I never thought i would be the wasteful person that I am now.
Anyone else became less frugal in their 30s?
Note: im not in debt or anything. But i dont hoard cash like I used to neither.

''Welcome, my guest, to the palace of Jericho!''
The prince said, waving his hands around, as we made it past the massive doors. Inside, a view very few peasants ever saw in their lives. Of absurdly tall ceilings, of intricate pillars, of statues commemorating past monarchs and high-standing officials. I Dieudonné couldn't believe my eyes, and followed the prince, savoring every sight and every second.
''Tell me, where would you like to have tea? We can go to the royal terrace, the balcony, the inner gardens...'' The prince asked me, as we made our way up the stairs of the atrium. I scratched my head and wondered, what would be the smartest answer?
''Well you see, I've always wanted to see what a prince's chamber would look like... If that's not asking too much of you, my liege.''
The prince turned around, with an annoying look on his face. ''Listen, you don't have to be so formal. Let's just be friends and enjoy ourselves.''
I jumped on the opportunity and raced to him, slapping him on his back, telling him how glad I was. ''But I don't want to be your friend just because you're the prince, don't get me wrong. I just like clever people is all'' I told him, and I saw him smile, through his nose and eyebrow gold chain, scintillating in the light of the hundreds of candles and torches around us.
Alone in the private chamber of the prince, I sat on the pillow on the ground, next to a low wooden table. My new friend the prince poured water in a kettle and put it over the fire. I wondered, why in the world would he make his own tea?
''Tell me, why not ask a servant?'' I finally asked him.
''Well I wouldn't really be treating you for tea, then, would I?'' He replied, walking toward me with a wooden box.
I made sure not to show any greed on my face, yet I couldn't stop wondering if that box was a present for me, considering the sheer luck I had of meeting the prince by chance, and becoming his friend as well. The prince put the box down in front of me, and opened it, revealing dozens of compartments, each holding fine quality ingredients, such as colorful powders, seeds like anis and cardamom, cinnamon bark and so many others I had never seen before.
''Tell me, what's your favourite tea? Do you like sweet, or bitter, hot or cold? Spiced or not?''
I Dieudonné was outmatched for once. I admitted I had no knowledge in tea whatsoever. ''I only know the dry, black one, that you break appart..''
The prince had a surprised look on his face; ''You mean tea bricks? I didn't think you'd be one of those types...''
I asked him what he meant by that, and he explained that people's taste in tea reveals a lot about themselves, who they are truly. I thought it incredibly funny how he needed tea preferences to tell the nature of people, when all I needed was to look at their face. But I rather enjoyed his little trick, this prince wasn't as stupid as people are usually...
''If I could have any tea, I'd have orange tea. I just don't think it's appropriate to ask for that, since you've already been so generous to me.''
For once I was being honest with him. I wouldn't dream of telling him the whole story about my father and the orange, the incense, but it felt good for once to tell the truth. The prince smiled and closed the wooden box, its overwhelming aroma taken away. He rushed out and left me all alone, in his room. For once in my life, I heard it. Complete silence. If not for the occasional crackling of the fire.
I Dieudonné closed my eyes and relaxed. I couldn't wait to sip on orange tea! Insidiously Greed got a hold on me once more, and I got up on my feet, remembering my plan, my princely plan...
I stepped around the room, looking at everything. The comically large bed, the white silken bedsheets, the pillows filled with feathers. The bookshelves full of not only books and scrolls but also of trinkets like a globe of the earth, a telescope and most intriguing of all a tiny chest, half-opened. I could see, if I got close enough, coins perhaps?
I kept listening to any coming footsteps, so as not to be caught in the act, but the kettle started boiling and whistling. I had to get back to my seat but my body was moving on its own! Only one of these gold coins would give me the life of a prince, if only for a single day... And the door opened. I shifted my gaze to the telescope, pretending not to hear the prince coming in, to be fascinated by the instrument.
''Tell me, do you look at the stars sometimes?'' The prince asked me, in his hands, a bowl, filled with orange powder.
''I don't think I've spent a single night not looking at the stars'' I lied, looking at him smiling.
He placed the bowl on the table, brought over the kettle, as I took my seat once more, just before stealing a last look at the tiny chest in the bookshelf. From under the table he took out a tea making kit, with a few cups, a tray and two peculiar statuettes, representing a dragon and a sheep.
I sat there and looked at my new friend, the prince of Jericho, brew orange tea. He gave me a tiny hourglass, instructing me to flip it over once he pours the boiling water on the tea. Instantly the aroma filled the chamber, and I noticed we both started smiling. I brought my cup closer yet to my surprise he poured the tea over the statuettes, wasting the tea.
''Why waste it?'' I couldn't help asking. He laughed and explained how the first steep is merely to wash the tea, and is offered to the tea pets. I sat there, nodding, arms crossed. Ah yes. It seems the prince is a tea connoisseur! I couldn't help but think he just wanted to show off to me, his new friend.
The prince poured the water once more, I flipped the hourglass once more, and he offered me the first cup. I brought it to my nose and Heavens did it smell good. I dipped my lips into it but at that instant I thought about Daysha, how happy she would've been to be here right now, and what she was doing instead, for my sake..
The tea was surprisingly bitter, yet so aromatic! The prince laughed and laughed, and poured himself a cup. His laugh was surprisingly familiar, much akin to the ones of my neighboors back in my hometown. He gulped down his tea and got up, clapping his hands. I did the same and saw him run to the telescope. He brought it over to the window, and gestured me to come over. Stargazing now, are we?
He took a few minutes to set everything up, while I waited outside on the balcony. The view was already incredible, overlooking the inner palace and most of Jericho as well. From here I could see the plaza, but not beyond the tall walls. The prince finally said it's ready, and I got closer, curious as to what that tool could show me that I couldn't see with my eyes. Stars are stars after all.
But what I saw, in that strange little tube was not a star but an orange, stripy ball, with some bright dots around it... What in the world?
''That, my friend, is Al-Mushtari, as the arabs call it. We call it Jupiter, the greatest god of them all!''
To gaze at gods themselves! I fell on my butt, suddenly dizzy. The prince laughed and looked through the telescope as well, smiling ever more. At that moment I really wanted to leave, but also to make sure I'd see the prince again, for my plan hinged on that.
''My prince I must thank you for your hospitality. What pleasure to share tea and spy on the gods with his majesty-'' I started, but he turned toward me with a puzzled look on his face.
''Don't tell me, you're off already?''
I explained to him how I just got to Jericho today, and that I had to get back to my sister and uncle, and he stopped me once more;
''Well remember, then. I'll meet you tomorrow morning at the plaza. I truly wish to meet this family of yours, and offer my blessings. Take care now, my friend.''
And for the first time in my life, the man I was talking to had the face of a friend, and I didn't know what to think for a while. He walked me out in silence, and shook my hand, leaving in it a tiny bag. I smiled and walked out, escorted by the palace guards, inspecting in my hand yet another present from the prince; more of that orange tea powder.
Standing there in front of the metal gate of the palace, that closed behind me, I felt somewhat alone, if only for an instant. I am, after all, Dieudonné, a man that is truly free. Yet I couldn't help but look forward to meeting my new friend again, the prince. And gifting the orange tea to my foolish sister, as an apology. Yet beyond that, the dark clouds that were my princely plans loomed over all.
Making my way back to the fruit shop, I couldn't help but think back on Daysha and that tall man Lemarcus. As much of a fool as she is, my sister truly saved me there, and made it possible to meet the prince as well. This present may not be much, but I hope it'll show her how grateful I am of her help. Though she did owe me one...
The streets of Jericho were unusually quiet and empty. Some loners were here and there, smoking and drinking. Others were hurrying their steps, as if late to some important meeting. How miserable. At that moment I Dieudonné realized I was one of them! One more of these rats, scurrying about in the dead of night, hurrying toward the void that is their lives!
No matter what face I have truly, that of a prince or of a peasant, what matters are my actions. No more of this! I know what to do, to become prince at last, and fate itself landed me a hand! Yes, I will go forth with my plan, no matter what. For the life of a prince is the only life worthy for me.
I passed under a low banner and in this dark alleyway I thought back on Daquan, that guard I had poisonned so cleverly. I couldn't help smiling, and I didn't really like what that meant about me. Is killing a man that simple? Behind me, a fool, coughing and stumbling, his breathing raspy and annoying. I hurried my steps, as I was close to the fruit shop, but it seemed like the sick fool behind me hurried as well. I turned around briefly, and in the feeble moonlight I saw his bearded, scarred face, no longer that of a gambler, but that of a vengeful killer. We crossed eyes and he yelled ''Dieudonné you peasant!''
I didn't like that. I faced him, separated by a few dozen meters, surrounded by boxes and garbage bins and low hanging banners. We were completely alone here in the alleyway, and the only thing I could hear was his struggling breathing, and his coughing, as he was hurrying toward me, holding something in his hand, what, a knife?
I Dieudonné had enough of that man. No matter how grateful I was of the hand of fate, bringing me closer to my goal using that despicable man, I decided to finish what I had started.
''What, you want to kill me, good guard?'' I taunted him, looking at his curved dagger in his shaky hand. Daquan coughed once more and leaped toward me, screaming, murder in his eyes, but he was so slow from the rat poison. I punched his arm and his dagger fell on the ground loudly. ''What did you do to me?'' he shouted, his face so close to me I could smell his incoming death. I remember just how ugly and pityful he seemed to me. He had the face of an angry child, throwing a tantrum for having his favourite toy taken away.
''You deserve this, you failure of a man..'' I whispered, as I grabbed him by the neck. His bloodshot eyes then filled with fear, with dread, and at that moment I let go of him, frightened. What was I trying to do?
But Daquan reached for his dagger once more and I remembered my vow. To do whatever it takes. ''I can't die, for I become prince tomorrow.'' And so I kicked his face and his belly, I turned him on his back and pummeled his face, his gambler face, and ignored whatever he was trying to say to me, until his weak arms couldn't stay up anymore.
I didn't notice rain had started, and I got up from down there, my fists bloodied in red, my head aching. I looked down at the dagger and laughed, what a ridiculous tool. I pushed Daquan to the side of the alley, under a few boxes and a fallen banner, and I spat on him, as he extended his hand to me, begging for help. ''Die as the rat you are..''
I ran away from there, back to the fruit shop. I didn't know if I wanted to laugh at the top of my lungs or collapse and cry. All I wanted was to be alone. I made it to a crossway, and looking around I- well I was lost. Where the hell am I? What am I doing here?
Tall dark buildings. Banners whirling in the wind, wires flailing about, crows cawing, flying around high above me, under the feeble rain. I looked to one side, and the other, I couldn't tell the difference! Where is Daysha, where is the black lake, and my hometown? Why am I here, in this hellish city, alone, my hands stained with murder?
I noticed I was shaking, and couldn't breathe properly, and my mind was spiraling, how dizzy I felt. I sat down, there in a dark corner of an alley, and I placed boxes over me, and covered my feet with a fallen banner, and tried to sleep, just to escape. I tried to sleep just to see if all that really happened. I tried to sleep and realized once more, I was nothing different from Daquan! Here I was, same as him, except I'm to keep living in this shithole of a life I have been so proud of living.
I, Dieudonné, thought of suicide for the first time that night.
The crows woke me up once more, not their cawing but their beaks! I jumped awake and chased the black birds away. Did they think I had died? As if I would die such a meaningless death... My head was aching all the more, and I got up, trying to piece out where I was exactly. I was just a few buildings away from the flower shop actually. All around me, the bustling life of Jericho had started anew, in the early hours of the morning. The sun had just started to rise, and a soft breeze washed away my worries, if only for an instant.
I Dieudonné entered the fruit shop, nonchalantly, my hands in my pocket, for they were still bruised. But no one was there. I was expecting Daysha, ready to jump in my arms, and the tall Lemarcus to be standing in his doorframe in the back, reeking of tobacco. Only the parrot greeted me, with his usual ''Thief, thief, thief I say!''
But I had had enough of that, and as I made my way to the back of the shop I shooed the bird with my hands. Upon seeing my bloodied, bruised knuckles the parrot flew away screeching ''Murderer! Thief! Murderer!'' and I froze. Did I really kill that man? And not by poison, with my own two hands? I walked in the bathroom there, and I noticed a big tall mirror. I made sure not to see my reflection. I jumped in the shower and washed away the dreadful night, to be ready for the dreadful day I become prince at last.
All ready I walked to Lemarcus's door, and knocked quietly. ''Daysha?''
I heard some rustlings, a few steps, and my sister whispered as well from beyond the closed door. ''Go away Dieudonné. I don't want to see you ever again. What a brother you are.''
Her words hit me like a brick. I kneeled down and slid under the door the little bag of orange tea, the prince had given me. ''All I want to say is, I'm sorry.'' I told her. And I meant it.
I heard her pick it up, and scuffle back to the bed. I heard Lemarcus's voice, and Daysha's voice, such loving words, and I was taken aback. I thought she would hate him!
I stole some lotion in the bathroom for my knuckles, thank you Lemarcus. I made haste for the plaza, for the prince himself was waiting for me. On the way there, I could hear faint music, festivities, growing louder and louder. I hurried my steps, much like a child would do, and low and behold a full on festival was taking place, with dozens of musicians playing drums, flutes, lutes and others singing. Dragons and sheeps were dancing to the music, their big colorful bodies going up and down, moved by the many feets beneath them. Kids were running around, petals were falling from Jericho's sky and a new, bold banner was erected, its calligraphy impeccable : Tea Festival.
And there, standing alone at the entrance of the plaza, the prince. Approaching him I noticed his smile, and how relaxed he looked. I took the time to really look at him, at the gold chains on his face, at his crown, at his clothes so elegant. On his face I saw the face of a happy man, and I didn't like that.
He saw me at last and ran toward me, smiling, his eyes full of life. I noticed around him, the people, recognizing their prince, and smiling, and bowing, and I could see how respected he was. I thought, back then, about just how badly I needed that, just how badly I needed everyone to look up to me, to worship me. My vow strenghtened once more, and hugging my new friend smiling I could only think of murder, of deceit.
We entered the fruit shop, and it was still empty, the closed door of Lemarcus in the back there made me wonder if they were still in or out. No matter. All I needed was a few minutes. ''I'd like to treat you to tea, as well, as we wait for my family.'' I told the prince, and he sat down. How glad I was of the parrot not being there, that irritating creature. To my surprise the prince said ''I always wanted to taste that tea brick of yours!'' and I couldn't help laughing.
The kettle whistling, just like it did the day before at the palace, I poured into it the harsh bits of black tea. A far cry from the expensive ingredients of the prince. I told him to bring over a few blackberries, how nicely would they go with our black tea. In the meantime I poured myself a cup, and quickly threw in the rest of the rat poison I had bought the day before in the kettle. I exhaled and closed my eyes for a second. The prince came back and pretended to throw a berry in my mouth, laughing. And he did, a perfect throw! How oblivious can the prince be?
''So, my prince, what are you planning to do today?'' I asked him, pouring down his death sentence in his tiny cup.
The bitter, almost poor aroma of the leaves surrounded us, and as he lifted his cup he told me how he didn't have much planned today, and that they could perhaps spend time at the tea festival. I looked deeply in his eyes, waiting for him to drink his tea at last.
Right then the backdoor opened, and tobacco filled the air, to my annoyance. The prince put down his cup and got up, bowing to the tall man and the curly woman looking at us. Right there I cursed the heavens, and slammed my cup on the table.
''My sister Daysha, uncle Lemarcus, please meet my new friend, the prince of Jericho!'' I proclaimed, a bit too loudly.
I remember the look on lemarcus's face, his squinty eyes, pinning me down, I could tell he didn't like me. Once again Daysha proved to be a useful fool and grabbed his arm, dragging him toward us.
The prince sat back down, and offered them to share tea with us. I got up and took the kettle, saying how I'll just make a new batch, but the prince insisted. ''As you told me yesterday, why waste it?''
Of course I wanted the prince to drink it and die, so that I could take his place. And I didn't mind if that man lemarcus dies, for I despised him. But I didn't want Daysha my sister to die such a meaningless death!
''Very well, but Daysha, you won't like it. Why don't you bring us some refreshments instead?'' I proposed, trying to get her to look me in the eyes, and notice what was going on. But the fool was clutching at lemarcus's arm, smiling, and told me she'll just add my present to the tea, that she took out.
The orange tea I gifted her! And so the prince took it upon himself to pour two more cups to Daysha and Lemarcus. She added the bright orange powder to her cup, and also to everyone's cups, smiling.
Daysha asked a few questions to the prince, as they ate berries, holding their lethal cups, warming their hands. I Dieudonné sat there, and debated if I should just flip the table and maybe punch lemarcus, as a pretext to stop everyone from drinking the tea. After all, I'd get another chance sooner or later.
I looked down at my cup, and catched a glimpse of my reflection, amidst the scintillating of the orange powder, much akin to the prince's golden chains on his face, and at once the fountain of greed within me sprang anew. Damn it all!
She's a fool, he's a lustful man, and he's the prince I'm meant to be!
''Now, let's drink to our new friendship!''
And I burned my throat, gulping down the tea, not even tasting it. I slammed the cup on the table, and to my horror, to my bliss, they all did the same.
With how much rat poison I had put in the tea, the effects would start rather soon. My sister, with rosy cheeks, asked me ''Dieudonné, you told us your friend is the prince, yes, but you never told us his name?''
And at that I couldn't hold my laughters, it was too much for me.
''Yes, you never did ask for my name, even after you told me you didn't care about me being prince...''
We all grew silent. The prince added, smiling, ''Tell me, are we really friends?''
This is when they started dying.
Coughing, and retching, and all that. I dragged Daysha and Lemarcus to their room, making my best impression of someone worried for his friends, for his sister. She held my arm, and in her eyes, the same fear in saw in Daquan the day before. She whispered, in my ear, how she wanted to give me a present, as thanks for bringing her with me here to Jericho. She placed in my hand, orange incense. We both got teary eyes. I told her, once again, for the last time, ''I'm sorry.''
I closed the backdoor. Alone once again with the prince, I towered over him. He was asking for a glass of water, and to go fetch a guard, to bring him back to the palace.
I lied to him once again ''Now, my friend. I have an antidote, but first you have to tell me everything I need to know about you, about the prince of Jericho.''
He was shocked, and couldn't breathe for a few seconds. I fell to my knees and slapped him. I told him ''You see, my friend, I'll take your place as prince, and become the man I was always meant to be.''
At that the prince struggled to laugh, holding my arms; ''I was never the prince! I did just like you, Dieudonné my friend. I took the jewels and the clothes and the knowledge of the last prince, and I made myself prince.''
I got up, and stared him down. He added ''And the prince before that! All pretending, all greedy, all imposters!''
He struggled to get up, fell to his knees, and whispered to me, holding my legs ''I have only ever showed you kindness, generosity, friendship... And you would kill me, and take my place?''
I saw, at that moment, the prince had the face of despair. I pushed him down on the ground, and I couldn't help but cry as I removed his clothes, his crown, and painstakingly removed his golden chains, the true symbol of his majesty.
All the while the prince was laying there on the ground, staring at the ceiling. He tells me, his voice raspy and his breathing short; ''So you'll get my haircut, get some new piercings, wear my clothes and my jewels... So you'll be the new prince of Jericho... Will that satisfy you?''
I froze. I looked down to him. he added, pleading;
''Will you at least spare me, your friend? I'll tell you everything you need to know, the name of the servants, how you should act, secrets, all of it. Just give me the antidote, and give Daysha and Lemarcus the antidote. And go, I'll forget about you, Dieudonné, the man I thought was my friend.''
He told me everything, and I lied to him once more, about how the antidote will save his life. I made him drink some of my tea, and he smiled. I asked him his name, and he told me, crying.
But I forgot.
As I walked out, the parrot rushed in, yelling ''Murderer! Murderer! Thief!'' Once more.
The next day, I was walking down the main road, on my way to the palace of Jericho. On my face, the gold chains, on my head, the crown. And adorning me, clothes beffiting of a prince. And on everyone's faces, admiration, love, respect.
I held my head high, and smiled broadly, for at last I was a prince, with the face of a prince. What bliss.
I entered the palace, and made haste to my chamber, where a few days ago I drank tea and laughed with the previous prince. I jumped on the bed, took a nap. Never slept better in my whole life. I awoke and filled my pockets with gold coins, emeralds and ivory. I demanded a servant to make me some orange tea, but I didn't drink it, I wasted it.
I pushed open the bathroom door, avoiding the mirror once more. And there, the bathtub of a prince, with lotions and soaps and warm water on tap. I poured myself a bath, filled with all the luxury products I could find. I reached for my pocket and took out the orange incense Daysha had given me, before dying of my hand.
I placed it down on the counter, in front of the mirror, and lit it, its fragrance, taking me all the way back to my hometown, to little Daysha and my family.
I glimpsed at the mirror at last, looking at my perfect reflection. Never before had I seen my face so clearly, if not from the still surface of the cursed lake. In the flickering of the candles, I saw the face of a murderer. I saw the face of a thief. I saw the face of a spiteful man.
I couldn't take it anymore, I punched the mirror, reopening my wounds on my knuckles. The mirror cracked, and my reflection was mutliplied. I looked at my bloodshot eyes, at my golden chains, at my stupid haircut, and I grabbed the golden chains and screamed as I tore them with all my force. Blood gushing out, pieces of my nose, my ear and my eyebrow, at the tip of the golden chains. I threw away the crown and tore down my clothes, drops of red staining the royal floor, as I ran away toward the exit, toward the roads of Jericho.
Outside, I walked around, aimlessly, my mind, numb. I was just so tired of it all. So what if I was prince at last?
There, walking toward me, peeling away his orange, the tall man in the white hat, the blind man, the man with the wise face. He puts a hand on my shoulder, and says, as if to himself :
''Ah! There is the man with the cursed face. Welcome to Jericho!''
Thank you so much for reading, please leave a comment! I would love to read your thoughts-

I’m getting one of these BB’s, and i want my future phone to be able to use 4G of course. Can anyone tell me which one can use 4G Data?

Hello! I have just purchased a BlackBerry Curve 9360 3G with the interested of using it as a Dumbphone. I haven't really explored the world of BlackBerry but it was $12 on eBay so I thought why not.
Few questions: 1. Does it even work for calling/texting people? 2. Does it support app downloading? (Kindle/Audible is what im looking for) 3. Anyone have one and want to share experiences?
I've read online that a lot of carriers dont support devices like these, so any recomendations on a cheap one?
Thanks again :D

Hello! Rookie here; I'm BlizzardBl4ke 'Blizzie', nice to meet you!
So, heard about BB closing... yet, I have this old gentleman (https://www.gsmarena.com/blackberry_curve_9220-4459.php) and wanted to give it a second life. Bought in 2012, and still works like the first day, or well, not exactly. Since BlackBerry closing, it's impossible to download any app as from BlackBerry world and all of that, but I have a little project in mind. I'd like first to solve the problem of app downloading, for example, could you tell me how to download Whatsapp, Telegram, and such apps or how to get a new app store? Is it possible? If so, I'd like to go ahead and 'revamp' the phone changing the camera and RAM to revalue it and use it as everyday phone. Where or how can I find compatible pieces so I don't make a big mess with firmware? Thank you for your attention and knowledge, I'm literally a newbie in Blackberry and need lots of help. :) I'm staying tuned, thank you again!

I recently received my mom's old blackberry curve because my cell phone broke (I only need to use it for texting and calls) and it's locked with rogers. She hasn't had an account with them in over 5 years and I'm wondering if there's anything that can be done to unlock it? I've gone to multiple phone places including rogers and they said there was nothing they could do.

Hi,
I still have my blackberry 8520 in good condition but it doesn't boot, it stucks at logo with Africa, when i checked there was no sd card so probably it doesnt find os to boot. I want to get this phone back to life, Im guessing probably the current os doesnt support anything such as whatsapp, facebook, youtube or maybe not even search engines.
I am open to install the original rom and where do i find it because official website doesnt have it and also if there is no blackberry rom i am also okay to install any custom roms.
(I have 2gb, 4gb and 16gb sd cards that i can use for this phone)
Thank you, have a nice day. :)

mig33

gua pake jaman SMP. Gua pake di Sony Ericsson k510i. Masih pakai jaringan 2G (GPRS atau EDGE). Waktu itu gua pake buat chat sama temen temen SMP. Udah ada group juga.. namanya room. Cukup ngirit karena mostly text. Ga berani kirim gambar. Waktu itu gua pake Indosat IM3. Daripada SMS 1x Rp150 mending make mig33. Konsep kuota data belum ada. Adanya Rp1/kB. Aplikasinya pakai yang versi Java. Ribet lah harus download .jar dari web mig33.

MXIT

gua pake waktu mulai masuk SMK. Ninggalin mig33 karena network effect. Temen temen makenya MXIT yaa ikut. Udah upgrade make ke Nokia N70. Jaringan udah dapat 3G (UTMS, HSDPA bahkan HSUPA). Udah mulai berani kirim gambar. Udah ada konsep kuota. Bela belain nabung 50rb buat beli kuota Telkomsel Flash 100 MB. Cukup buat sebulan!

Yahoo Messenger

Sempet pake pas magang SMK selama 3 bulan. Abis itu ga pernah pake.

Skype

Cuman pake 1-2 kali dalam setahun. Biasanya telepon partner kerjaan di Aussie aja.

BBM

gua pake pas kuliah. Kepaksa karena orang kantor pada pake. Gua kuliah sambil kerja. Anak kuliah waktu itu kepecah antara BBM, WhatsApp dan Line. Sempet beli BB 8520 paling murah dan install 3 apps ini. Tu hape underspecs dan overprice gila. Gua masih pake paket Blackberry Internet Service (BIS) yang termurah. 60rebu/bulan. Madesu banget cm bisa chat. Ga bisa browsing. Buat akalin gw subscribe ke newsletter biar bisa baca-baca di TransJakarta. Ngenes juga. Jaringan masih pakai 3G. Gua pake BB dari Smartfren.. jadi ngandelin EVDO nya smartfren.

WhatsApp.

Karena ngerasa bego beli BB pas lihat canggihnya temen pada pake Android.. gua lego tu barang ngeselin. Orang di kerjaan dan kuliah pada pelan pelan pindah ke WhatsApp. Dengan budget ga jauh dr BB gua dapat Andromax I. Amaze dengan fiturnya. Wow factor ya pas balik dr Mall Ambassador minang ni hape.. Google Maps an di angkot dan gw bisa track macet di rute depan sampe mana. BB sampah emang.
Seneng sama konsep kebebasan Android. Paket data ayo, WIFI juga jalan. Install dr PlayStore atau sideload juga cincay. Gua cukup tech savvy.. jadi kebebasan ini penting banget. Hal ini yg bikin gw ga hepi pake iOS sampe detik ini.
Konsep paket data jelas dah biasa.. 1GB sebulan cukup banget buat chat, kirim gambar. Youtube an juga jadi biasa. Di masa masa ini gw pake 2G aja masih aman buat WA.
Sampe era 4G, 4G+ dan sekarang 5G masih gua pake. Karena network effect semua pake. Awalnya gua sebel krn fitur ga senendang Telegram. Tapi semua orang pake, ya udah. Makin kesini WA ngejar sih.

LINE

Sempet install dan pake buat PDKT sama cewek. Waktu kuliah hehehe. Uninstall krn tu cewek ga ada interest sama gua. HAHAHAHA. Ini app bloat banget. Auto uninstall. Circle gw geser ke WA semua abis kerja.

Telegram

Gw mulai pake abis jadi mandatory chat apps di kantor. Superior apps dibanding WA. Multidevice dari year one bahkan. Gua pake dari jaman pake Andromax I sampe sekarang gua pake Samsung A54 5G.

(What a fun title am I right?)
I’m pissed off with smartphones (the concept of, current market directions, existing software, form factor preferences etc) and every time I’ve had to get a new one, the thing I’ve said is “next time I’m making one”, and I guess it’s finally time.
For the last week or so, I’ve been looking into exactly how I’d make a phone, and I’ve sorted the basics. Khadas Edge V for form factor and power (but I need to check power draw), some sort of spdif dac attached to a breakout board from the gpio (phone is gonna be THICK), m.2 b key lte modem with 3 ipex antennae, the juice board for the Khadas edge + a lipo battery of reasonable size (might be limiting myself there, I’m debating seeing if i can reduce the size of a usb battery instead, as they have their own charging circuits, although I’d need to adapt or select for pass through). Probs just a micro sd for storage, and then I’ll 3D print myself a case (or resin print if I want it smooth) that will screw onto the back of the rest of the hardware.
Where I’m making things complicated is that I want a vertical sliding qwerty phone running Linux (Debian probs). Now, I can write my own apps just fine, plus there’s tons of existing ones. That’s easy enough. What I can’t do quite so easily is source all the components I need to make the shell work.
Now, I have 3 options, having done a bit of research:

1. make the entire thing myself. It’ll be a pain in the butt, but there are bb q10 keyboard breakout boards, plenty of generic mipi dsi displays, and you can buy tensioned slider mechanisms online (or cannibalise existing ones). It’ll be a lot of 3d printing and look maybe half as good as a Star Trek tos prop, but it’ll do the job, and I will finally be free of android/apple/bloatware bullshit.
   
2. Cannibalise a bb priv. I do have several options on vertical sliding qwerties, but afaik, the bb priv keyboard should work the same as a bb q10 (where the torch I imagine works more like a curve’s keyboard, and won’t be so clean on repurposing). Similarly, it’s not IMPOSSIBLE (purely in the literal sense) to write drivers for a mobile display. If I’m even lucky, some might already exist. I’m betting that they don’t, but you never know until you check (and I promise I have tried checking, but the bb subreddit seems peculiarly tight lipped).
   
3. Same as above, but find a touchscreen display that matches the non-curved dimensions of the glass screen cover, buy the oem screen cover, and glue it to that (+ paint on the bezels where I’m not using it from the inside). It’s not exactly the most elegant solution, and again, I haven’t been able to find the exact dimensions yet, but it may just work (of course, I might need to make risers to fit the frame if the screen is too thick, but that’s a 3D printer + superglue job, nothing I’m too frightened of)
   

So I guess what I’m here for is:

1. does anyone have literally any information beyond the Wikipedia for the blackberry priv (or even better, an old one with only the parts I need working that I can buy off you). Specifically regarding keyboard assembly, and display connections (or just screen measurements of the flat parts).
   
2. better recommendations on the sbc. I’m REEEELATIVELY sold on the edge V, but I’m really not that fussed. I do like that the ports are down one side though, because it really will make this phone a portable computer. I was considering a dart sd410 for its built in modem and low power + size, but obviously that’s more work on prototyping, and variscite haven’t gotten back to me on unit pricing yet (I suspect they may not be taking me seriously, which is as irritating as it is understandable)
   
3. Recommendations for specific parts. Like I don’t know loads about buying antennas, but I assume they are not all created equal?
   
4. any specialist equipment that’ll make my job easier? I’ve heard using oscilloscopes for signal probing on display connectors is one way to go about reverse engineering. I don’t exactly relish the process, but I can absolutely buy an oscilloscope and stick a probe near a wire no questions asked. Otherwise I think I have most things you’d need?
   

I am open to general recommendations and advice, but I’m not changing the core spec. So yes I’ll hear anyone out on “making your own chassis will genuinely be easier”. I’m even open to “this sounds absolutely daft, following for the trainwreck”. But ultimately, I want to make a vertical sliding qwerty phone that runs one linux distro or another, and I want to use a blackberry priv chassis to do it, so hitting me with the “buy an android and flash it” isn’t gonna cut the mustard. My issues with modern smartphones are just as much with hardware as with the software, and part of the aim with this project is deminiaturisation (to the point of easy modification while retaining handheld form factor, dw I’ve got big hands)
Also, the more oem parts a suggestion lets me keep, the better. I know it’s not a cheap project, and I know it won’t be easy either, but I do care about reuse, I don’t care about how long it takes me, and from a tech evangelism perspective, I get the feeling that the more it looks like a phone, and the less it looks obviously like a stack of pcbs in a plastic box, the more reactions will veer towards curiosity rather than incredulity. Like the phone is for me, but I’m not above trying to convert people to my daftness.

The Vines came almost all at once, on a warm otherwise unremarkable summer night twelve years ago. Teddy didn’t remember their coming. He was only fourteen now, which meant he was two when they came. Actually, it wasn’t exactly accurate to say he didn’t remember their coming.
There were the dreams.
In the dreams he’d be asleep, peaceful in his bed, when suddenly, with the rending sound of a thousand angry zippers the snakes would punch through the walls, yellow eyes flashing, their mouths open wide and hissing, long saber-like fangs spitting luminous green venom. They would spill into the room like waterfalls and begin to coil around him in his bed. Tighter and tighter until breathing became an impossibility and the hissing crowded out even his own panicked thoughts and the world beyond his eyes began to grow dark.
He didn’t always wake up screaming from these dreams, but he did so often enough that his parents worried about it. He could hear them talking about it in low whispers sometimes when they didn’t think he could hear them. Sound carried well in this house. But that tended to happen in structures where the walls didn’t always line up, floors sometimes leaned crazily in every direction, doors had long ago been pulled permanently free of their frames, and windows were smashed and lying on the ground in twinkling shards of glass.
The vines had done all that.
Teddy lay in his bed in the eternal twilight of Vine World, which was what everyone called ground level these days. He knew that if he looked at the wind-up clock on his nightstand he would see that it was eight o’clock in the morning, give or take fifteen minutes. His brain knew what time it was, even if there wasn’t enough sunlight down here to confirm what his brain already seemed to know.
“It’s your Shark-Alien rhythms” his Dad had once explained. Whatever that was. Teddy made a mental note to look up “Shark-Alien” on his next trip to the library, though what sharks and aliens might have to do with waking up with the sunlight, he couldn’t possibly fathom.
The “ceiling” of his bedroom was a vine. Twenty feet in diameter Teddy guessed, big for sure, but not even close to the biggest vine Teddy had ever seen. The vine’s underside bowed freakishly down into his room. On the right side of the ceiling it coiled away and upward towards the sky. On the left it traveled back through the wall it had smashed twelve years ago and down into the ground. Teddy’s Dad had nailed some boards in around the places where the vine touched the walls in an attempt to weather-proof the room, but the vines were alive. They moved constantly, breathed almost, even if it was only barely perceptible, and the seals rarely held for very long. This morning, humidity poured through the gaps between the vine and the walls and a thin sheen of sweat broke out on Teddy’s forehead and in his arm pits.
Mostly the weather stayed on the right side of the “wall”, but not always. It got particularly bad in August, which was Hurricane season here in South Louisiana. But those only hit once or twice a year, and only that often in the really bad years. When they did he would simply move in with his parents, or his brother Bob, for a couple days until the angry wind blew itself out somewhere over Arkansas or Mississippi.
Teddy stared thoughtfully up at the vine. He wasn’t sure exactly what you were supposed to call the skin of the vines… bark he supposed. The bark was scaly, like a snake or a fish, each scale the size of a frisbee and shaped like the business end of a spade. The scales were generally brown, but there was a soft iridescence to them and a subtle shifting pattern of colors constantly rippled across the bark? Scales? Skin?
“Whatever”, Teddy mumbled as he pulled himself up to a sitting position.
It was the thorns you really had to look out for. Teddy was lucky though, there were only two thorns on the vine that had been his bedroom ceiling since just before his second birthday, a day he remembered only in his dreams.
The thorns were not conical like those on the ragged patches of blackberry bush that still somehow managed to thrive in the backyard places where occasional columns of sunlight fought their way down through the alien canopy. No, these thorns were more like the arrowheads his Dad had taught him to hunt with, though much larger. They were shaped like pyramids, with a point sharp enough to stab through wood and four symmetrical ridges so hard and razor sharp they could put a score on a piece of glass.
There was poison in them too. They’d found that out the hard way, hadn’t they? But the less said about that, the better, Teddy thought.
He could hear the house coming alive below him, now. A wood fire crackled in the cast iron stove his Dad had salvaged from… somewhere, and Teddy could smell the faint odor of the smoke working its way up to his nose through the many gaps in the crazy vine-altered structure of their house. Firewood was not a problem in Vine World. The trees that hadn’t been violently uprooted by the sudden appearance of the vines had long since been choked off by the canopy on top and the strangling alien roots below. As a result, there were thousands of dead trees laying in and amongst the vines, quietly seasoning themselves for the cooking fires of Teddy’s future.
Teddy’s short brown Cajun hair sat bolt upright on top of his head. In a simpler time, a time before the vines, his first order of business in the morning might have been a shower. But fresh water was much harder to come by now that you couldn’t get an unlimited supply simply by spinning a tap. His Dad had built rainwater catchment in all the places where the vines funneled water reliably down to ground level. But while rainfall remained as unpredictable as ever, the human need for fresh water did not. And so what fresh water they did have was reserved mainly for drinking and cooking.
He walked through his bedroom “door” which was more like a concept of a door than an actual one. The door frame leaned crazily to one side like something out of the Esher paintings that hung on the walls of the Library in town. He walked out into the hall and scrabbled down the floor which fell away from his room at a loopy downward angle before hitting a bottom of sorts, and then curving back up towards the stairs that would take him down to the bottom floor.
Teddy looked up and saw that Bob was just pulling himself up the last three feet of the incline and onto the landing at the top of the stairs. Always “Bob”, never “Bobby”. His parents had tried “Bobby” for a while but from the very moment Bob had learned to speak he’d begun to correct them. “Is Bobby a good boy?” they’d ask, and little Bob’s face would scrunch down into an expression of deep thought and consternation and he would bellow “—OB!”
And so Bob he had become, and Bob he would forever be.
He was six now and he turned to see his older brother negotiating the crazy rolling hills of their upstairs hallway and smiled. “HI TEDDY!” Bob almost always shouted everything. It was kind of his thing. But he loved his brother, and Teddy loved him right back.
“Hey Bob”, Teddy said as he lost his grip on the hard wood floor and slid back a couple feet. It occurred to him that it probably wasn’t very safe for a six-year-old boy to climb around on a crazy structure like this, but then again almost everything in Vine World was dangerous. You had to pick your battles.
“RACE YA!”, Bob shouted and took off down the stairs, which had somehow remained improbably intact. In addition to the shouting thing, Bob was always “racin’ ya!” everywhere.
Laughing and hip checking each other in a good-natured way, Teddy and Bob bounded down the stairs, their footsteps pounding a syncopated rhythm on the old wood of the staircase. As they neared the bottom they could hear Mom in the kitchen shouting “Hey, hey, HEY! Come on guys, slow it down!” She was worried about thorns, of course, they were everywhere. But after twelve years, six for Bob, the brothers knew exactly where they all were. As they ran, they ducked, bobbed, and weaved like running backs in a sport they would never watch or play, one that had died a quick and violent death on that awful day twelve years ago, like so many other things.
The boys skidded to a stop on the old linoleum floor of the kitchen, still giggling and elbowing each other in the ribs. A vine the width of an elephant’s trunk stood in the very center of the kitchen. It had erupted up through the floor like a demonic volcano and now occupied the room like a support strut holding up the ceiling. It was covered with razor sharp thorns, and Mom and Dad had done the best they could to wrap the lowest and most dangerous of them in old towels, ragged bits of clothing, and a few salvaged traffic cones so that there would not be a repeat of the “accident” that had killed Carthage.
Carthage had been the family dog. He was sweet and friendly and a mutt. “like God threw a beagle, a terrier, and a chihuahua in a barrel and rolled it down a hill”, Dad had often said. Carthage had been a great dog, but a hyper one. It was in his genes. And aren’t we all, ultimately, doomed by our own genetics?
It was his hyperactivity that had killed him.
Carthage was a jumper. All you had to do was look in his direction and even before his name had a chance to fall off your tongue he was up on his hind legs and jumping straight up in the air. Sproing, sproing, sometimes he’d clear three feet straight up, his little head wiggling back-and-forth at the apex of his leap like he was trying to squeeze an extra few inches out of it.
They’d been in the yard when it happened. If they’d been in the house there was a decent chance, Teddy thought, that Carthage might have remembered about the thorns and not jumped so enthusiastically. But they hadn’t been in the house, and Carthage had put everything he had into that final leap.
The thorn caught him just behind his right shoulder and Carthage yelped in surprise and pain, immediately thrusting his tail between his legs and cowering at Teddy’s feet, whimpering with fear and unanswerable questions.
Dad had come running at the sound of Carthage’s distress and at first the injury hadn’t seemed that bad… well not that bad for a severe puncture wound anyway. The thorn had slid into the dog’s flesh like a hot blade through soft butter. But it was not deep, and barring infection it certainly did not seem life-threatening. But something about the drop of green liquid that hung from the tip of the thorn like thick luminous dew had made Teddy’s skin crawl. And within an hour it was clear that Carthage was a very sick doggie.
He’d lasted the night, curled in Teddy’s lap, whimpering and looking up at his boy with big watery eyes that were full of confusion, pain and fear. And little Teddy had cried right along with him, not able to do anything for his dog except to be there for him. To let him know that if nothing else, he was loved. To bear witness.
Carthage’s end had come before the real end, and that, at least, had been a mercy.
There had been a few final labored breaths and Carthage’s nose, which had been resting on Teddy’s leg, rapidly moving up and down with his ragged breathing, suddenly began to weigh down on Teddy with the weight of something no longer in control of its muscles. And then a final breath came out as a whimper, and Teddy knew Carthage was gone.
But that wasn’t the end. Oh no, it wasn’t the end at all.
Teddy had been holding Carthage in a towel and that had probably saved his life. Carthage’s skin had begun to ripple and undulate like his body had filled up with giant hungry maggots. Despite his love for the dog that had been his only pet, Teddy pushed the corpse off his lap with revulsion just as the dog began to literally dissolve in front of his eyes. Here and there, Carthage’s skin burst open with steaming jets of glowing green goop. The skin melted away revealing the jagged curvature of the animal’s ribcage and then even the ribs began to run in gloopy white rivulets. Teddy had just enough time to think “those were his bones” and then, finally, nothing at all remained of the dog except for a putrid greyish-green puddle of bubbling slime slowly eating its corrosive way into the Earth.
And Teddy’s tears, of course.
It was hard, even now, for Teddy to see a thorn and not flash back to that difficult day. To the awful danger of the thorns.
The towels his parents had tried to wrap them in didn’t really offer much in the way of protection, either. The thorns were simply too sharp. If you were to forget yourself and stumble into one, it wouldn’t take much pressure for the tip to stab straight through like the pike thrust of an angry Spartan Hoplite. And from there, a slowly gurgling puddle of alien slime would be your ultimate destination.
You stepped carefully in Vine World. Very carefully.
But the wrappings did serve as a reminder of what was there. The incongruous pastel colors of the towels and the neon orange of the cones caught your eye and alerted you to the danger in a way that simply trusting yourself to notice the same damned thorns in the same damned places day-after-day could not.
Towels had not been their first idea, nor even their second. The towels were more of a last resort. Dad’s first idea, coming right on the heels of Carthage’s untimely and unlovely death, was to saw the damned things right off.
“Come with me”, he’d said to Teddy, who was only eight at the time. And Teddy had gone. Dad had been a contractor before the vines came and his workshop, really just a shed filled with his tools, had survived the coming of the vines mostly intact. Pulled along towards the shed by his father’s rough hand, they walked into the shop together and Dad pulled a two-foot wood saw off the wall.
They’d walked back to the offending vine with its offending thorn still dripping poison in an obscene parody of Teddy’s tears and Dad had lain the saw on the thorn at its base. With a roar of anger, he’d pulled the teeth of the blade across the thorn. Teddy heard a sound like a rifle being fired on full automatic as each of the metal teeth snapped off clean at the edge of the blade. Dad threw the ruined saw on the ground and stomped angrily back to the shed, shaking his head and cursing under his breath… something about “those Christing thorns!” Teddy thought. He’d come back with a fifteen-pound sledge and was swinging it before he even stopped walking. The head of the sledge came down perfectly on the sharpened tip of the thorn and…
PING!!!!
The sound of two heavy metal pipes being smacked together reverberated between the living canyon walls created by the vines, and the sledge bounced off the thorn like a kid jumping on a trampoline. The momentum of the bouncing sledge knocked Dad right on his ass. He pulled himself up off the soft ground and walked over to the thorn. He leaned toward it until his nose was almost touching its smooth surface, almost like he was trying to see it at the molecular level.
“Didn’t even dent the goddamned thing…”, he’d said angrily. And that had been their last attempt to destroy a thorn.
Mom pointed at Bob, “you, sit at the table, I’ll have your breakfast ready in a minute.” Bob happily ran off towards the kitchen table, his hands swinging back and forth above his head. Teddy thought the kid looked like a crazed chimpanzee when he ran.
Bob pulled himself up onto the bench seat at the kitchen table and Mom pointed at Teddy, “And you, put your gear on, I need some veggies from the garden.” She tried to sound like a drill instructor, but there was a nervousness on her face that gave the game away. For his part, Teddy hid his excitement as best he could. He didn’t want his parents to know how much he loved going to the garden. You weren’t supposed to enjoy climbing the vines.
You were supposed to fear it.
Teddy headed back to the “gettin’ ready room”, as in, “we’re gettin’ ready to go outside.” It was a room just off the back porch, the only room in the house where there were no thorns. The one totally safe room in the house. You could do The Macarena in here if the mood caught you right.
On the dozens of hooks Dad had installed on the walls hung gear that he’d scavenged from a demolished sporting goods store on the other side of town. Teddy shrugged into a suit of armor made of mis-matched gear from a half-dozen sports he would never get a chance to play. Football shoulder pads, a baseball catcher’s chest plate and leg guards, thick hockey gloves and a helmet. None of this would stop a serious thrust from a thorn of course, but it would protect against most everything this side of a glancing blow.
Looking like a rejected extra from a Mad Max movie (they had DVDs in the Library too) he pushed the screen door open past shrieking rusted hinges. Mom heard the door opening, hell the whole world could hear this door when it opened, Teddy thought.
“Watch out for the vents!” she yelled from a room away.
Teddy’s shoulders slumped and he sighed with obvious frustration. “Watch out for the vents” was the unofficial motto of Vine World. People said it to each other the way they might have said “have a nice day” or “Merry Christmas!” before the vines came. But Vine World left no room for such trivialities. There was too much danger, too much fear, and too much at stake.
“The goddamned vents…” Teddy said to himself. He tried not to curse in front of his parents, but sometimes, well… sometimes the right word was the right word. “Le mot juste!” he said, much louder than when he’d cursed. And in some weird way, he thought his parents might have been even more surprised to hear him say that than they would have been if they’d heard him say “goddamned.” But when your kid spent every waking hour in a library, that was the kind of thing your kid was apt to say.
Teddy stepped out into what had once been their back yard.
If you could forget about the danger for one moment, it was almost beautiful.
Above his head the vines twisted and coiled around one another in a vast Gordian Knot of alien bark and thorns. Iridescent color shimmered along their lengths and what ground cover had survived the sudden plunge into darkness all those years ago reflected the light as if the aurora borealis blazed overhead. Here in the eternal twilight of Vine World, lightning bugs didn’t know what time it was either, and their belly lights twinkled and shone in the darker corners of what was a living organic cathedral.
From the safety of the back door the scene looked like a magical glade from a Tolkien novel. If a Hobbit, a Dwarf, and an Elvin Archer suddenly appeared walking behind a grey-haired old wizard lighting their way with a magic wooden staff, Teddy thought he wouldn’t bat an eye. “Might not even be the strangest thing out here today”, he thought to himself, and smiled.
Across the glade, an asterisk drawn in bright orange spray paint beckoned. Teddy scanned the yard, looking for vents mostly, but also for the… Things… that came out of them. There were none, and that was something, at least.
He glanced back at the wall of the “gettin’ ready room” and saw his own compound bow hanging next to an empty space where a larger bow should have been. “Dad must already be out hunting”, he thought. Teddy grimaced. “Anything but a Scorch, Dad” he muttered under his breath. He was getting pretty tired of eating Scorch.
Welp, there was always the vegetable garden.
He made his way slowly across the… Teddy continued to think of it as The Glade, even though twelve years ago nobody would have ever thought to call it anything other than somebody’s plain ole backyard. He moved slowly because things could change in a catastrophic instant in Vine World, and things that changed here almost never changed in your favor.
His head spun as if on a swivel and he walked in a strange crouch, ready to run at a moment’s notice in whatever direction might lead to safety. Twenty steps, then thirty, then fifty…. He counted as he went knowing that it was exactly sixty-seven steps to the orange asterisk. Somewhere behind him, he knew his Mom was trying to keep one eye on him as she took care of Bob and got the house ready to face the day. He could feel her worry across the space between them but there was nothing she could do except hold her breath and hope for the best. Vine World was about surviving one day at a time and everyone had to do their part.
The vines had forced Teddy to grow up fast.
“Four thousand, three hundred eighty days…” he said out loud. That was how many days they had survived by taking survival one day at a time. You never thought about tomorrow or next week in Vine World. That kind of optimism could get you killed. The distant terrified shrieks that sometimes carried to Teddy’s ears when the wind was blowing just right in the darkest most silent graveyard moments of the night were an awful reminder of that fundamental fact of their existence.
Teddy reached the asterisk and put a sweaty palm on it (tag, you’re it!). Above him a dozen pieces of two-by-four marked the upward trajectory of a large vine in three-foot intervals. In another time, there might have been a treehouse at the top of those two-by-fours, a sign out front boldly proclaiming, “no girls allowed!!!!” But not here. Not in Vine World.
The ladder steps went up about thirty feet and then disappeared into the tangled canopy overhead. He began to climb.
A minute later he had reached the underside of the canopy and paused to take a deep centering breath. It only got hairier from here. He pulled himself up into the disorienting alien tangle and below him the Glade disappeared from view, lost in waves of shimmering brown scales.
Somewhere below, their visual connection broken, Teddy’s mom stifled a worried sob and tried to focus on Bob.
A few seconds later and Teddy was standing on a broad flat expanse of vine. Here and there thorns gleamed malevolently in the gloom. Dad had helpfully circled each one in orange paint, not that Teddy needed a warning to steer clear. He looked up and saw the route winding its way up through the tangles, marked with more fluorescent orange paint. Courageous beams of sunlight stabbed down through the canopy here and there and it almost seemed to Teddy that the vines shied away from them, like they were more comfortable in the gloom. In the dark. Where the monsters roamed free and ate their fill.
Teddy had no idea exactly how high the vines went. He’d asked his Dad once and he’d said “dunno Kid, more than a hundred feet, less than five?” It was six hundred thirty-seven steps to the top of the canopy, Teddy knew that much, but the twisting path his Dad had marked meandered all over and around the complex tangle of vines. Sometimes you even had to go down a ways before you could go back up again. Teddy guessed it was about two hundred and fifty feet from the top of the vines to the ground.
Teddy was relatively safe up here. The things that came from the vents couldn’t get at him up here. “As far as you know” he reminded himself. Every now and then something new did come out of the vents, and it would be dangerous to assume that the vents would never vomit out a creature that could pursue him into the canopy. A shiver worked its way down his spine despite the heat of the day.
Ten minutes later he had almost made it to the top and he quietly thanked his Dad for the orange trail markings. It had taken almost a year for his Dad to find, map, and mark this route, and even though he’d climbed it hundreds of times, Teddy knew that without the markings he would soon be hopelessly lost up here. And if you got lost in Vine World, the best you could hope for was that you’d die of starvation or thirst before the Things got you.
It was much brighter now. What had been tiny little beams of sunlight down on the ground had become great gushing waterfalls of gleaming warmth up here. Teddy followed one last looping path around a super vine, this one easily fifty feet across, and saw the final stretch of orange painted ladder steps at the end of a short, narrow tunnel.
Teddy laid on his back and began to push himself along this horribly claustrophobic space where a dozen smaller vines coiled tightly around one another. It was so narrow that if there were even a single thorn in this space it would be impassible. As he crawled, he thought of his dream… and the snakes. Were the vines sentient? Might they one day wake up, realize that a boy was crawling through this passageway and suddenly clench themselves into a crushing final embrace?
In the shadows, Teddy shivered uncontrollably.
A few more yards and Teddy pulled himself into the last chamber at the base of the final ladder. His face was bathed in pure white sunlight that forced him to close his eyes so tightly it hurt. Brilliant sun spots danced on the blood red insides of his eyelids and the complex networks of his capillaries stood out in stark relief.
Doc Hebert, the town doctor by virtue of the fact that he was the only doctor to have survived the coming of the vines, had once told Teddy that he guessed Human eyesight would adapt completely to the gloom of Vine World eventually, and that within a thousand years or so, it might be impossible for Humans to venture out in direct sunlight at all.
Teddy thought that sounded like a damned shame and he laid here a minute longer, letting the sun warm his face for a while in honor of his sun-blind descendants, whom he would never meet and who might never get this chance.
But there was a job to do. He opened his eyes to the sunlight again, pulled himself to his feet, and climbed the last few feet to the roof of Vine World.
He rose up out of the gap in the vines like a submarine Captain climbing out onto the conning tower of his ship and looked around. The view never ceased to overwhelm him. All around, in every direction of the compass, was the terrible evidence of what had happened that day.
Vines. Vines by the millions, by the tens of millions… blended and woven as if they’d burst forth from the loom of the fates. They covered, buried, choked off everything he had ever known. If he squinted, it almost looked like a vast shag carpet of brown and green stretching in rolling hills and valleys to the horizon. Up close, you couldn’t see an individual vine move, or breathe, or whatever it was that they did, but across the miles and miles, the subtle combined movement of all the vines together made this alien roof ripple with motion.
A thick mountain of vines rose, alarmingly, to the north. Dad said he figured that must be Baton Rouge, since there were no actual mountains here in the flat Earth of Louisiana.
The idea that this “mountain” might have once been the second largest city in the state was, well, thought-provoking. It suggested that the vines grew as high as they needed to in order to overwhelm whatever might be in their way. Like the Kudzu that had once threatened to choke off all the vegetation in the American South before the Vines had provided the final say in the matter.
Did the Eiffel Tower itself lie dead and rotting underneath a city-sized pile of vines like Tiger Stadium just a couple hundred miles to the north? What about The Freedom Tower in New York? The Burj Khalifa? The London Pickle? The Taj Mahal? the Pyramids of Giza?
Teddy didn’t believe that. Couldn’t believe it.
He just couldn’t believe that everything that had ever been, everyone that ever was, all that had ever been known, could really be buried under the vines. He thought that the day he did start to believe that, would be the day he gave up and let the vines have him.
Up here, the vines sprouted leaves. Massive, lime green and waxy, they were big enough that a married couple could use one as a blanket if they were brave enough to try. As far as anyone knew, the leaves were not dangerous by themselves. But the way Teddy looked at it, you couldn’t be too careful when it came to the vines. The leaves hung like massive organic solar panels, collecting the sun here on the roof and delivering its energy to the real bulk of the vines deep down in the darkness below Teddy’s feet.
Spread out before him were a dozen raised garden beds made of salvaged four-by-fours, anchored into the woody scales of the vines and bristling with summer vegetables.
“Vict’ry Gardens” his Dad called them.
“Victory over what, Dad?” Teddy had asked him once.
“Over starvin’ to death, Bub”, had been the reply, and they’d both laughed so hard their bellies hurt, even though there really wasn’t anything funny about it at all.
It had been hell getting all the wood and dirt up here, but Doc Hebert had told Teddy he thought the “Vic’try Garden” idea, which had been his Dad’s, had probably saved the town. Once Teddy’s Dad had proven the concept, other gardens had begun to spring up all over the “roof”, and Teddy could see other townsfolk tending to their own gardens in the distance. He waved to a distant figure he thought was probably Mrs. Hebert, it was hard to tell this far away, and she waved back. He tried to judge the distance and guessed it at about two hundred yards. “Length a two football fields, Bub”, his Dad might have said, even though Teddy had never seen a football field and probably never would. There was one in town, about two miles east of here at the city high school. But like everything else it was buried under the choking mass of the vines. The goalposts, once shining and white on Friday nights, now forever twisted and rusting in the dark.
Teddy wandered between the rows picking tomatoes, lettuce, and peppers and pushing them into the carry bag at his hip. He loved it up here. Despite the alien view, you could almost feel normal with the sun on your face and a warm gulf breeze tossing your hair around.
Was the Gulf of Mexico still there? Or was it just a memory, buried under the vines like everything else? He didn’t know, and in any case, it didn’t matter. Any place you couldn’t walk to in the hours between dawn and dusk might as well be on the moon.
Which reminded him. He checked the watch on his wrist. He knew it was still early in the morning, but he checked anyway, out of habit. You always needed to be aware of the time in Vine World. You could run into a… Thing, at any time of course, but at night… that was when they hunted.
His carry bag was full now and so he looked once more into the sun, letting it toast his face one last time. He closed his eyes and mentally prepared himself for the long walk down to the ground and the short dangerous sprint across the glade and back into the house. The summer sun was still hot, but Teddy knew that in a few weeks they’d be up here planting the fall vegetables… pumpkins and squash mostly. Over the years, a brisk trade in heirloom seeds had sprung up alongside the damaged church that had been turned into something of a Town Hall by what remained of their little community.
It's always easier to go down than to go up and Teddy got back to the final stretch of ladder steps almost before he realized it. He looked down through the hole in the canopy, down on the warm lights of his house so close and yet so far away. And again, he had that sense that he was looking in on an Elvish Glade. The way the vines had incorporated the house into their infrastructure, the lighting bugs flitting here and there like fairies, the preternatural silence, it was as if this house existed on the outskirts of Rivendell, rather than Southern Louisiana.
He climbed slowly down the last stretch of steps. His suit of armor felt heavy and cloying now that he was so close to safety, and he just wanted it off. His right foot touched the mossy ground and a sound like Armageddon drove a bolt of ice into his spine and nearly stopped his heart. A terrible ripping sound, like the skin was being torn off the world.
He turned slowly… very… slowly and saw it. A jagged crack had appeared on the ground halfway between himself and the house. It started as a single point and slowly grew, right to left, until it was nearly four feet long. The ripping became an ear popping whoosh and the crack broke open like a lanced boil, spilling a sickly green light into the glade.
A Vent. A goddamned vent.
For one crazy moment he thought about running for it, leaping over the vent and through that poisonous light like a horse leaping over a hedge in an equestrian event. His legs actually tensed up, ready to begin pumping themselves across the space between himself and the vent. And then he froze, all thoughts of a heroic escape suddenly and irrevocably banished from his mind.
Because now there was something in the light. Movement. A shadow. Something was coming out of the vent. Teddy leaned back against the vine and waited to see if he would die immediately, or if the vines would decide to give him a fighting chance today.
What came out of the vent was a nightmare mash-up of a scorpion, a lobster, and a spider roughly the size of a large pit bull. Its dinner plate-sized claws clicked together curiously as if searching the air for something to cleave in two. The six legs behind the claws were much longer than a scorpion’s legs, more like a spider’s legs, long, spindly, arching, and multi-segmented. Each leg ended in a needle-sharp point that dug into the soft earth as the Thing struggled to pull itself free of whatever Hell had spawned it.
It was a Scorch.
Plenty lethal of course, but there were much worse Things lurking in the depths of the Vents, and he’d dealt with Scorches before. There was still a pretty good chance he’d die right here at the base of this vine, but with a Scorch there were always… possibilities.
Sixty-Seven Teddy steps away, his Mom stood in the open back door, both hands over her mouth which was open in a terrified “Oh.” There was nothing she could do to help her son now, and she knew it. Whatever was going to happen in the next thirty seconds would happen whether she intervened or not.
Bob stood behind her, peering out between her legs. “WATCH OUT BRUDDER!”, he shouted, and Teddy almost rolled his eyes. “Yeah no kidding, Bob”, he thought uselessly.
The Scorch’s claws were moving ceaselessly, and their SNAP SNAP caused Teddy to flinch each time they closed on one another. But it was the stinger that commanded his attention. It was like a dagger at the end of a long retractable tail and it too moved this way and that, looking for something fleshy to plunge its length into. But Teddy knew that the stinger itself, and the poison it contained, were not the worst part of what that tail could do. At the base of the stinger would be two small holes…
POP POP… the sound of twin firecrackers and Teddy thought “here it comes!”
From those two holes jetted two completely different but complimentary chemicals. And as they mixed in the air they ignited a three-foot jet of blue flame, and any newcomer to Vine World would have known instantly how the Scorch got its name.
Teddy remained rooted to the spot just in front of the orange asterisk his Dad had painted, frozen in place. The Scorch’s alien red eyes, seated on top of long stalks that could rotate in three hundred sixty degrees searched for him, but Scorches couldn’t see very well, and as long as he stood perfectly still, there was a good chance it wouldn’t see him.
But just then a breeze rustled the hair at the back of his head and Teddy knew that he had a bigger problem. The breeze was blowing his scent directly at the Scorch, and a Scorch could target you by your smell as easily as a hunter with a rifle and a scope.
And sure enough, after only a few seconds, the time it would have taken the breeze to travel from Teddy to the Scorch, it suddenly spun on him. Teddy had been spotted.
The Scorch came at him.
Time seemed to slow to a crawl, seconds drawing out into hours, as every weapon in the creature’s considerable arsenal pointed right at Teddy’s most vulnerable spots. Its arachnid legs were a blur. The stinger came up and coiled back like a compressed spring, ready to strike. The claws opened wide and Teddy knew that whatever part of his body they targeted would soon be lying on the ground, detached and spilling great gouts of blood.
He put his arms up in front of his face. Maybe the hockey gloves would hold against the blade-like claws… maybe the umpire’s chest plate would deflect the stinger.
Maybe…
Maybe.
Across the glade his Mom screamed and for a moment it was the only sound in Teddy’s ears, except for the rushing sound of his own terrified blood. And then another sound cut off his Mom’s scream.
THWIP!!!
Followed by a shriek from the Scorch that was so brain-piercingly awful it was almost a weapon unto itself.
Teddy opened one tentative eye and saw a long shaft sticking out of what passed for a head on a Scorch. Both stalked eyes were bending inward, eyes rolling madly in their alien sockets, desperately trying to see what was causing it so much pain.
It was an arrow.
And now the high-pitched keening of the Scorch was joined by the THUMP THUMP THUMP of footsteps running towards the glade, and Teddy looked up and saw his Dad leaping over a low hanging vine, one hand reaching into the quiver on his back as he did. Without breaking stride, Dad nocked the arrow, drew back the string, and fired a second time.
This time the arrow thumped straight into the Thing’s cerebral cortex, or whatever it was that Scorches had rattling around in their skulls. The arrow had the desired effect. The Scorch dropped flat with a meaty thud. Dead before it hit the ground, its lights turned off as if by a switch.
Breathing heavily, Dad looked at his son, lost under a pile of second-hand sports equipment.
“You OK, Bub?”
Teddy looked back at him. “I guess it’s Scorch for dinner after all.”