So a company reached out to me, I’ve done the interview and after a day, they messaged me on my phone number to ask for a quick call. 9AM ko natanggap ang message nila tapos nakita ko at nakapagrespond ako sa kanila at 9PM. 2 days ago na ‘yun. Wala na akong update. Rejected na ba ‘yun? I think I’m weirded out that they reached out for a quick call at hindi lang ako nakasagot agad parang ghosted na ako.

Why would a guy find you attractive, speak of how well you get along but not feel ‘romantic’?
I can’t get over him
October last year I matched with a guy on a dating app. I’ve never really had a march quite like it, an instant connection, amazing conversation, so much in common, nice physical spark. I was excited . On dates he would hold my hand and talk about how he feels we get along so well
But he kept me at a distance, never flirted over text, messaged in a really formal way, took several days to reply. Confusing given that we connected so well on dates . He had a few problems in the bedroom where he said he was ‘thinking too much’ but I was patient. He said he felt comfortable with me
Then he lost his job, had visa issues (he’s from Australia) and eventually said he didn’t feel romantic and that he wanted to be friends. He said it was a him thing and nothing on me
He remains friends but still acts a bit strange. Sometimes he texts me all of the time, sending memes and recipes and other times he disappears for a while. Then he asked to see me and he took me to play golf, he was hugging me a lot , touching me subtly and telling me how he feels that me and him get along so well. He told me he might go back to Australia next year but he’s not sure
I went on holiday last week and during that time, he was liking every story post I put up of myself, sending me messages asking about my holiday. I then replied back to him and I said ‘how are you doing?’
He didn’t reply. He continued to like my stories and posts but won’t reply back. This doesn’t make sense to me
He’s moved a couple hours away for a new job and I couldn’t help but see if he has a new hinge profile. He has just gotten a dating app profile and seeing it has made me sad. His profile even says he is looking for a long term relationship :(
I don’t get it . I’m 29 and never had a partner and me and him really clicked. Could it be he still likes me somewhat?
I’m upset tonight cause I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m an attractive woman, he used to tell me I was pretty and that he loved my company, but why would I never be good enough for a relationship. I still have feelings for him and I’m scared I’ll never lose them but also scared i won’t ever be liked by anyone
I’ve never had feelings for anyone like I did him. And I don’t get his behaviour or if it means anything

Is this site a scam?
A few days ago, I received a text message from a woman. She told me her LINE ID and made real estate inquiries, but it wasn't me she was looking for.
For a few days she had a casual conversation, and one day she told me that she was a shopping mall broker and introduced me to a zalandowebs.com site.
She said that when I select an item from a https://www.alnaturashops.com/, the item is uploaded to the zalandowebs.com's merchant center, where the consumer makes a purchase.
I chose 20 high-margin products, and after a day, one customer placed an order.
She said that when an order comes in, I has to send a message to the Zalando staff in charge of supply. (The employee uses their LINE ID.)
I gave them my order ID. The person in charge told me that I had to pay for the cost of the product and asked me to choose a payment method. The first was to pay in coins (ETH, BTC, etc.), and the second was to transfer the money to the account provided by the company's finance team.
By the way, I am Korean, and to my dismay, the account number was from a Korean bank, and it was a personal account.
I'd been pretending to be deceived to see how far this woman was going. The woman posted photos of her daily life, showing that she lives in South Korea. And similar to the romance scam, he said that his mother was Korean. As an emotional appeal, he recounted his experiences and made them emotionally sympathetic. The funniest part was that there were many moments when this person was talking to multiple people and forgot what he said, and there were many moments when they didn't make sense. Already at this moment, I knew that this woman was an impostor, and I continued the conversation for fun.
I found a number of errors in the zalandowebs.com and asked her to explain them. She treated me like an idiot and cursed me all the way. Then he asked me to come to where he lived.
When I asked the person in charge of supply about the error part, he could not give a clear answer.
When I asked about the site on Korean social media, they all said that it was not trustworthy. I analyzed my IP address and found that the site had a server in Hong Kong. And the owner of the site was unknown.
I would like to see this site shut down in Zalando or in the country if this site is really a scam.
There will certainly be many victims in the coming months. I'm very concerned about this. Please don't have any victims.

This is my first time posting so I’m sorry if it doesn’t make much sense or I’m trauma dumping a lot also a couple trigger warnings, I’m not sure where to start off with. Me and my mom used to be pretty close I’d say up until I started high school. Middle of eighth grade I moved to a new city so I was back to trying to find some friends. I’ve been moving around since I could remember, I used to live in Germany where I moved twice, then moved to the US around the Silicon Valley, moved again, and again and again now we’re here. I wouldn’t be explaining this part of my life if I felt like it didn’t have any weight in this situation. Middle school I found a friend, me and her got pretty close, stuck through Covid together. My mom hated her and not even two years into our friendship my mom started accusing her of stealing from us, being a bad influence and overall just being trashy. Her parents were in the middle of getting a divorce and she had a lot of things going on in her life. I dyed my hair red during this time too while being friends with her, she probably was a huge influence on me but that’s also because it was covid and I was bored and who doesn’t start irrationally bleaching and coloring their hair at 14. I think my mom thought she was a bad influence on that part too because she's the one that first started off coloring her hair like purple and pink etc. My mom never of course said anything to my friend but she made sure I would hear of her disapproval concerning her bad influence in my life. I stopped being friends with her freshman year since my parents banned me from having her over or going to her house, I couldn’t drive neither could she and hanging out at each other's houses was pretty much what we did 80% of the time. I was so frustrated and felt trapped because the only friend I really cared about was someone I wasn’t allowed to associate with anymore. I told her I was done being friends with her over text and blamed it on me just being in a dark place and breaking it off. She was confused and called me a week later about something personal but I just dismissed it. Granted there were other things going on in our friendship but I felt terrible about it especially since her parents were going through that divorce and I just left during such a sensitive time. I hate to admit it but I felt so much better since I started making new friends quickly and started sitting with a new group the next day. Mostly guys and other two girls, it worked out fine for the next year. Junior year my grades started dropping so my parents got stricter, started taking my phone, looking through it, screen time etc. I felt like it was a huge invasion of privacy since my mom would look through my texts. Me and my mom also started arguing weekly about whatever it was but when I mean arguing I mean like full on yelling for two hours down in the living room with no stopping. I can’t do anything about it because whenever I say something remotely disproving her so called “facts'' since she always speaks with so much authority on subjects she wouldn’t even know about I’m the one that has to quiet down from my fathers perspective, and I know this will be mostly about my mom but me and my dad have always been close even when we’re fighting within a week we at least make it up. We play the same sports, have the same humor etc. I understand this might look like us disregarding my mom and I know she cares and loves me yet in certain circumstances she doesn’t show it so of course there’s going to be reasons as to why I’m closer with my dad than her. For example I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes in 4th grade and of course I wouldn’t expect anyone to know that when you're low you need carbs or when your blood sugar is high you need insulin but my mom to this day still does not understand it. I wouldn’t care even if it’s my friend but as my mom you take so much authority over my life and who I can’t or can hangout with but you don’t know the basics of how I have to manage my life behind closed doors in the house that you and I live in every day. That might sound overdramatic but it’s just something I think about. Also growing up, I’m an only child by the way, I would always play by myself whenever we went on vacation for example to the beach etc. it was always my dad that came and played with me in the sand while at sharing his time with me and my mom so my mom wouldn’t gets upset over him leaving her to go play with me. Even now I notice how my mom would always make snarky comments regarding how my dad always treats me like a princess and cares too much over me. Anywho, since I know this is getting pretty long I’ll try to sum it up a bit more. I started liking one of the guys from that group, I would text him on a daily basis just about whatever. We were pretty awkward in person since I’ve never really talked to that many guys and I don’t think he really had much experience either so we stuck it to mostly phones, everyone else in the group also didn’t know. Once my mom went through my phone on one occasion that night, because she would collect it on some nights and read through my messages in bed she saw one message from that guy calling my mom bipolar and me responding with something like it’s fine like I still love her she freaked out. She told me to never talk to him again and that I’m a brat for talking about my family issues outside of the family etc. I honestly had nobody to talk to. The other two girls in the group didn’t really talk to me at this time, I later became really close with one of them though more on that later and I had no other friends in that town so it was really only him. He had a plethora of family issues that I couldn’t even imagine so I felt like he understood where I was coming from at times better than other kids with American parents. Not sure I mentioned but my parents were both born in Eastern Europe and grew up during heavy communism so that definitely affected them and their parenting style. Anywho, my mom sent me a paragraph to show to him, basically telling him to never talk to me again and that he has to apologize to her etc. After a couple months I think he took me out on a date. I'm not sure what to make of it since it was pretty casual. We just got ice cream. I told my parents that he was only picking me up so we could meet with the rest of the group when of course we’re not. The rest of the guys saw us downtown and found out about it. That kinda really sucked since I’m pretty sure one of them liked me so he got really mad and it kind of ruined the group dynamic. The guy I liked stopped talking to me a couple months in since I couldn’t really do much or go anywhere and dating as a result would be hard so he stopped really talking to me it was pretty off and on since I would get mad stop texting him and then he would try to get back texting at me and once I showed him I cared he’d stop. I was so mad at him and the situation that I refrained myself from talking to him, two weeks later he killed himself. I found out because one of the guys from the group faced me and told me. I went downstairs and started crying and formed the sentences explaining it the best I could, pushing a couple words out at a time. In that very moment I felt so hurt and vulnerable by what just happened my mom responded by just looking at me and saying that he had it coming for him since he probably vaped and drank. My dad ran downstairs since he probably heard me crying and the first thing he did without asking me any questions was hug me. For the first time ever he told my mom to shut up since her trying to ask me questions about how he died just made me sob harder. Over the next week my mom was pretty lenient about letting me go out. The next week she started asking what happened to him. Me and my mom were not close at all anymore at this time. You see mothers and daughters talking about guys or what dress they’re gonna wear to the prom etc in the movies. Me and my mom are not like that. On top of that I was overwhelmed with what happened and as someone does overthinking how things could have played out differently. Anyway I refused to tell her anything saying I was too uncomfortable and over the course of the next couple months of senior year she would get progressively mad and irritated at me to the point of arguing and yelling at me for not trusting her and telling her how he killed himself. I to this day told her nothing but she stopped asking. I don’t know how my dad feeds into this since he’s always so Switzerland about everything when I know I’m right in an argument between me and my mom, however when my mom has leverage he takes her side. Anyway, the beginning of senior year was rough. I hated being in that house and really started seriously considering the only options I felt like I had at the time. I started becoming closer to that one girl from the group earlier, spoiler alert my mom strongly dislikes her now too since she’s a liar and since she’s close with her mom but not her dad that means her parents are having marital issues and therefore her mom is a cheater etc. I don’t understand how she goes from one topic to another and sorts these things into her head. She’s my only friend that I’m really close with and I have been for the past these almost two so hearing this is very disheartening since I’m sending off senior year and I can’t do this again being so close to the end of the year. I forgot to mention but during homecoming I drank for the first time and I had one of my guy friends with his girlfriend and that friend that I’m not friends with drop me off. When he dropped me off he didn’t wave to my mom so she now thinks he’s a bastard in her words and disgusting and she deserves and apology for all the times he’s been over to my house etc. which I honestly think is insane because how do you always have so many issues over my friends and why are you so obsessed with 16 year olds, like you really have beef with high school kids as a 50 year old. Anyway the reason I bring that up is because I invited him over a couple weeks ago for some drills to help one of my other friends with mma since me and him used to wrestle and my mom got mad despite him not being there for me but for my other friends benefit. I’m not sure if this makes any sense. I'm trying to explain the issue best I can without saying too much. Anyway my friend, the one that I’m friends with now, the girl and that guy from the group that didn’t wave at my mom are both Latin so my mom started calling them cheaters and dirty etc when they had nothing to do with anything. This argument spiraled over me asking my mom if I can have a sleepover with those friends since we want to bring a new series on Netflix. Also during prom I asked my parents for 10 dollars since I already had twenty in my account and I wanted to buy hair stuff for prom. They gave me the 10 and I said how I was going to catch a ride with friend A so that when friend A picked me up but friend B that I did not mention in the plan picked me up my parents started calling and texting me. To give some background friend B has been close with me since freshman year, probably the only friend my mom has liked and also the only white friend I have not sure if that has anything do with it but there’s that. She’s really sweet and has been invited over multiple times to my house by my parents, they do really like her. Anywho yet since I didn’t mention that friend B was driving the car since my parents didn’t recognize the new car and knew it wasn’t friend A driving yet assumed it was indeed friend B but since I didn’t mention that they took all the money I had in my account which was only 30 dollars but it was what I needed to get my nails and hair gloss and hair spray for prom, I just started breaking down in the middle of target. I was so excited to get my stick on nails etc since I couldn’t afford to get the acrylics since I was paying for all my prom stuff for the most part. By the way I know that the 10 dollars was initially there so I understand taking away that but the other 20 I made selling my clothes on mercari and I had nothing else like no other cash nothing that was the money I worked on to get my prom stuff. It was mostly my dad actually that got mad at this point taking my money etc and than following a got a text from my mom saying I got what I was coming for by acting the way I have been. There were 3 others with me while I was at target so having three of my friends see me breakdown from me only having 14 cents left in my account was so humiliating. I ended up looking great at prom neither less so don’t even worry about that, my hair looked great and I found some old stick-ons in my laundry room and painted them white lol a couple of them popped off during prom but whatever. This has been really long and thanks to whoever spent their time reading through all of this I’m sorry if the read is a bit of a struggle but I just don’t know what to think or do of this situation. Keep in mind I’m 18 now, never have had a boyfriend, never have do anything, kissed, even held hands romantically etc. it’s one thing you know to not care about any of that but the thing is I do and I want to experience being a teenager and going out and going on dates and not worry about my mom flipping out on one of my friends. While we were in Italy one of the tour guys told her to move on the bus to make more room for others and she started cussing him out telling him to f himself etc for telling her a paying customer where to sit. Everyone started staring at us. I did not want to be there. I just kept my head down the entire time and didn’t really talk to my mom out of embarrassment for the next two days. Also after that prom incident I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere after as a result of go to friend B's birthday bash the next day so my mom texted her without my knowledge and told her not to tell me about how I’ve been acting up and one day I’ll learn when I’m her age but it will be too late and that I don’t know what I’m doing and finishing off my apologizing on my part for my behavior and I’m the reason why I can’t go to her party. Which I find so infuriating because one of the main reasons why I don’t tell my mom anything about my personal life is because I simply don’t want her to have that control of knowing what my life is like, I probably tell the teacher I TA for more than my own biological mother. The fact that she preached family issues in the family so heavily and that you should never talk about issues to others yet goes behind my back and tells my friend that my indecent behavior is the reason why I can’t go is so beyond me because where did your ideals go that you preached so heavily about. Every time I’m around my mom especially when she has her flares of anger I just start shaking like you know when you drink something with a lot of caffeine in the morning and you don’t eat anything so mid way through the day you just start getting jittery and anxious, kind of like that. Ok I think I’m done anyway thank you for tuning in cause I really have to start studying for human geo, thanks for reading up until here 🙂.

I'll repay you whenever I wake up, text me in my private chat so I know who's helped or hasn't, and thanks you guys and girls 237799540, I'll also leave my phone on since I don't know if it'll accept the codes you guys or your friends search if I'm not on the app

Me (F 20) and my gf (F 20) we've been together for almost 2 years na, mejo LDR din kami pero madalas naman kaming magkita kasi yung madadaanan namin papunta sa campus namin halfway lang. Lately this year lang, madalas syang magtampo or magalit over what you would call "mababaw na dahilan". Disclaimer lang, im not downplaying her feelings, i know magkakaiba tayo ng level ng sensitiveness and issues sa mga bagay bagay and i respect that pero some of her reasons are just beyond my level of understanding. Here are some of them: (im trying my best to relay them na hindi one sided ang dating so bear with me)

1. she joked about how i always play or hangout with my friends sa umaga kung wala akong pasok (i update her naman from time to time) and that i always talk to her pag gabi lang, she told me na baka hindi ko na raw sya gusto and all that and i responded "i still love you, i just have a life". she was fuming mad and told how offended she was, she kept telling me how could i say that to her and how inappropriate of a joke that was. ako naman i said sorry pero i kept explaining na that's not how i meant it naman, na i just mean it as is.
2. she randomly messaged me at night "what if you're losing me", so naki sympathize nako sinabi ko na pag may arguements kami, i feel that way rin sometimes pero i don't let that feeling dictate me naman what to do. sabay sabi nya na "wow, ouch so im losing you na pala? sakit naman nyan" tapos sabi ko na "didn't u just told me na im losing you" sinagot nya ako ng "what if lang naman yon, ikaw im losing you na pala"
3. panuorin daw namin yung final episode ng fav nyang kdrama ng sabay, i told her na wag nalang kasi gusto ko mag usap pa kami. later that night nakatulog na sya so im left wide awake at night, i decided na panuorin na yung final episode. kinabukasan habang mag kasama kami pinapanuod nya yung final episode sa phone nya tapos i told her na napanuod ko na nga kagabi, she was mad ulit sakin, it became a huge argument bakit hindi ko sya kasabay manuod ng last episode na yon when she's literally watching it on the phone na before even knowing na napanuod ko na, di nya rin naman ako inaya ng time na yon manuod ng sabay sakanya
4. me, my bff (her cousin), and her has a GC, so nung nag away kami ng dad ko, dun ako nag kwento sa gc namin cus i didnt wanna always repeat yung mga kwento ko so i decided dun nalang para both nila makita ng sabay. she got mad ulit kasi bakit daw sa gc ko lang sinabi, sana sakanya daw muna ko lumapit, i told her na gusto ko rin kasing ikwento dun nga sa pinsan nya na best friend ko rin, sabi nya pinili ko lang daw yung kung anong convinient w/o thinking about her feelings
5. pauwi na sya, galing kami sa mall kasi kumain, she kept insisting na wag ko na raw sya ihatid so i told her "sige na titignan nalang kita, di mo rin sure baka nakasunod ako sayo" nagtuloy tuloy na sya sa pag tawid pero di ko na sya sinundan, maya maya may tumawag saking kakilala ko, nung nakita kong nakatawid na sya at tuloy tuloy lang pag lakad, sumigaw nalang ako ng "ingat!" saka ko hinabol ung kakilala ko para magsabay nalang kami pauwi. paguwi ko sobrang cold nya sakin, saka inamin na nagalit sya kasi "hinayaan ko" raw sya hindi ko manlang daw sya hinatid, nagsorry ako at kinwento ko sakanya na may nakasalubong akong kakilala ko at saka sya naman ang nag insist na wag ko na syang ihatid, tinanong ko rin sya anong pwede kong gawin para di na maulit pero sinasagot nya lang ako ng "wag na" tapos galit na galit parin sya sakin. hindi ko manlang daw sya tinawag para ipakilala don sa kakilala kong nakasalubong ko. i made her feel like a random person daw.

Bakit ako yung gago: Kada magtatampo sya ng ganon, palagi kong dinidefend lang yung sarili ko imbis na intindihin or tanggapin nalang yung dahilan ng pag tatampo nya. Nagagalit rin ako sakanya pag nagtatampo sya ng ganyan kasi para sakin hindi makatwiran yung rason or dahilan ng galit nya.
just last night sinabi nya sakin na nahihirapan na daw sya magsabi sakin ng tampo nya kasi kada mag sasabi raw ako palagi akong may rason or explaination at totoo naman, lagi kong dinedefend agad yung sarili ko pag alam ko naman sa sarili kong wala akong nagawang mali. i just feel exhausted na talaga sa mga ganitong away na sobrang liit lang naman tapos biglang lumalaki ng sobra, i admit mabagal din akong maka pick up ng mga cues kung ano bang dapat gawin kaya feeling ko ako rin yung gago kasi dapat tinatanggap ko nalang ung mga galit nya sakin instead na idefend ko yung sarili ko. ano bang pwedeng gawin sa sitwasyong to?

TLDR - I congratulate myself on preventing my mom from getting a tattoo the day after she was released from the hospital for a minor stroke.
I got a call from my sibling that my mom had just been admitted to the hospital after she started slurring her words and moving oddly. They didn’t know exactly what was happening yet, but we suspected a stroke. I booked a flight out for first thing the next morning.
My mom was going through tests but the ER doctor had confirmed that it looked like she’d had a minor stroke. She would be in the hospital for a few days for observation. Once I knew that she had her phone with her, I texted her to let her know I would be there soon. She wrote back “I wish you weren’t coming” a few minutes later. I remember thinking that it was weird that I didn’t feel anything when I read that. I didn’t respond to it.
The next morning I flew out. Once I got into town, we found out that since my mom appeared stable, they were releasing her.
I was finally alone with her while driving her home, and she started telling me that she “has an appointment tomorrow” in this low, sly voice, which she only uses when she’s telling you something that she doesn’t want anyone to know about. At this point in the story there’s a gap in my memory - I don’t remember exactly how it got revealed, but the appointment was at a tattoo shop.
The next day rolls around, and physically, she isn’t ready to drive. I drive her to the place, and before we get there, she says “Just drop me off and I’ll call you”. There’s no way I was going to do that, but I’m trying to play it cool, so I casually mention that I’d like to see the place. I can tell at that point that she’s slightly uncomfortable with that.
We go in, and I act like I’m just there to do what I said, but I’m listening to the conversation between my mom and the artist. After looking at the sketch, the artist said something to me like “So, are you here for vacation?” She opened a door that I just had to walk through, and I felt all the words flow out so easily.
“I’m here because she was in the hospital for a stroke and was just released yesterday.”
The look on my mom’s face and her body language in that moment were chef’s kiss. Her reaction confirmed my suspicion that she was really going to try to get a tattoo right then.
The owner of the place told her she’d have to stop her blood thinner medication with clearance from doctor before he’d allow his artists to touch her. She claimed to have no idea that if she had tried to get a tattoo, she’d end up bleeding. On the drive home she was silent and sniffling. I was elated.
I’d never turned the tables on her like that. It felt good, and I’ve been holding onto that feeling ever since.

I'll repay you whenever I wake up, text me in my private chat so I know who's helped or hasn't, and thanks you guys and girls 237799540, I'll also leave my phone on since I don't know if it'll accept the codes you guys or your friends search if I'm not on the app

Most of the time I can text a customer within the app chat, but sometimes it takes me out to my phone's messaging app instead. At that point I won't text since I don't want these people to know my number coming directly from my phone. Which also sucks, because I usually send them a text of the drop off picture at their door through the app, but I don't if it takes me out of the app to text.
What is up with that?

I got the ol’ Grindr bamboozle. This extremely hot guy messaged me and the conversation flowed pretty well and was definitely looking for a hook up. We exchanged albums (essentially a collection of nudes) and started planning for a hook up. He gave me a number and told me to text him, which I did like a fool. He was keeping me engaged and it wasn’t until I said I was home and ready that he revealed himself with threatening screenshots of my nudes being prompted to send to my relatives on FB messenger. There was also a screenshot of my data, which not only included my number, but my mother’s number and my old home landline number as well as listing some of my relatives. He was commanding me to meet his demands and asked me to send him 3 $500 razor gold gift cards. I some how immediately talked him down to $400, but I stalled saying that I was having a panic attack and couldn’t drive to a CVS to get the card. He sent me multiple different sites to buy digital gift cards, but I lied and said that all my credit cards were maxed out and I didn’t have a debit card. I also faked my bank account to show him I had “no money” and he said he’d wait till I got paid at the end of the month. He sent me instructions on how to keep in contact with him and saying if I don’t he’ll send my nudes out.
Tbh I was gambling the dice and started messing with him for my own fun, but tbh I am still pretty shaken this has happened to me. Thank goodness for finding this subreddit! I have some piece of mind and direction on how to proceed. I already signed up for delete me, deleted my Grindr, set all my socials to maximum privacy, and sent a claim on IC3. I
’m feeling much better now, but my biggest worry is my mother’s phone number being apart of that list. I’m not really out to her, and this forcing out of the closet is a nightmare situation from me. I’m planning to ignore the guy, but I’m afraid they are going to start texting her.
I don’t really know if I’m asking advice or venting, but if someone has had a similar situation, it would be nice to hear about it.

I am 18, and I'll be graduating this year. With the economy being what it is, I'll have to take a gap year before going to a university, and unfortunately I'll have to stay at home with my parents. My father is incredibly physically abusive, and has violently and extremely beaten me down, smashed my head into the floor, stomped me out, all for little things like being late out of the door, and even attacking my (at the time) 12 year old little brother with a stock prod. He has Ofcourse cut this out for the time being after learning that I plan to cut him out of my life once I become able to support myself, and my mother doesn't want to have a healthy relationship with me, insisting that I pay for my own phone bill ($120) and once I graduate, that I should pay rent, because instead of having thousands of dollars to help once I move out, I need to know how to pay bills, 12 times. As well, she has never to my knowledge made things straight forward, turning chores into a guessing game instead of just letting me know what needs done, on top of being an enabler for my dads aforementioned violent tendencies. Anyways, I've been looking for a job since the one I currently have doesn't give enough hours. My mom has offered to help pay for gas in exchange for me doing some house chores. For three days in a row, she put down wash the floor, which I did, and I assumed that it was repeating due to the fact that our animals had kept dirtying the floor. Then, one day she stopped leaving chore lists, and so when I asked her why, she said it was because I wasn't washing the floor right, and after blaming it on me, giving me the silent treatment, accusing me of badgering her, and then my dad revealing that he's going through my personal belongings and that he found the weed my friend gave me, they decided they would not ask me for any more help, and that I would not be receiving anymore gas money, but I could ask them for a ride. I obviously want to spend as little time with them as possible, but I don't know what to do. For some extra context as to what kind of people l'm dealing with, when I was 7 and first got my puppy, my dads go to threat for the next few years was that he was going to sell her to dog fighters, he also makes creepy comments concerning 14 yo girls, and has an extreme obsession with respect, to the point where he didn't tip our waiter because he told him there was no lobster in a dish, and Ofcourse he dabbles in antivax, as the cherry on top of his cartoonishly evil exploits. The picture up top is a picture from 2023 after one of beatings to get an idea of how far he's willing to go, so can someone please tell me what to do

I’ve never been on this subreddit before, but I kind of feel like I just need some advice from random strangers on the internet rn (if you know what I mean). I just received this text from one of my classmates:
“My name I got a question. I have been up past 1:30am at least for almost every night since 7th grade bc of school work and other outside of school stuff. How tf do you stay on top of your work?? Im out here putting in like 90% effort I can give and getting 70’s and stuff while spending a shit ton of time. When I go all in on effort and efficiency I get one good day and am tired for the rest of the week. I genuinely need advice 💀”
For context, I’m a highschooler who was pretty much labeled as a GT (gifted and talented) kid from the moment I was born, and I’ve always kind of been able to bullshit my way into finishing courses with grades that can typically range anywhere between 98-100 (before this year, my lowest final grade in a course ever was a 96). The thing is tho, I’ve got no possible idea how I even do it. I will start and finish an assignment less than 24 hours (most of the time less than that) before it’s due in addition to getting like 4 hours of sleep every night, working out at least twice a day, playing 8-game basketball tournaments on weekends, trying to juggle social dynamics so my new, few friends won’t find out I’m a fucking weirdo and leave me like my old ones, and trying to figure out what kind of person I am, what I care about, and who I want to be. It’s all exhausting, and, honestly, I think this text from my classmate has kind of made me tip over the edge. I always try to put on a face in front of classmates and such so that they’ll think I’m a put-together, high-achieving, never-stressed kind of person, when, in reality, I sometimes feel like I’d rather lay down for the rest of my life, forget that anything exists, and wait until I die. I guess this text from my classmate is text evidence that I’ve done a good job of masking how I really feel, but that makes me even more scared. I’ve always kind of felt alone, so I’ve had to rely on myself and my imaginary characters/stories for comfort/company, but now that I’ve been masking how I really feel/who I am for so long, I sometimes feel like I don’t even know who I am; I feel like I just exist to act out roles in everyone else’s stories. I don’t really know what I’m trying to get at or what I’m asking for help with, but anything feels like it would help right now since I can’t talk to “friends” or my parents about this (my parents are the kind that would tell me to suck it up and keep going because “my entire future is at stake”). Again, I apologize if my thoughts in this post aren’t very clear (I chalk it up to staring at the same text message for an hour), and I’ll clarify anything confusing later. I guess it would also be helpful for some advice on how to respond to my classmate (I don’t want to tell him the truth since I think that would be pretty discouraging). Thanks in advance for any advice.

So my husband got this co-worker, which is fine, she's a older middle aged woman. It started with asking for a ride home because her knee was bad , that was fine, then it was to follow her home 2 minutes down the road to make sure got home safe , also fine, whatever. They have a work group chat and she's been progressively DMing him, asking if he's going to be in work.... alright , whatever again. I went in to finally see her face to face and she just kept making constant jokes and what not but when it came to me it seemed really odd, like a 1000 yard stare and quiet, just mostly chatting with him. I felt uneasy about the interaction and came back later cause I forgot something, so I made more conversation and she started talking, so that was better. But I noticed this morning he told me she texted him again after asking to just ask him things via work group chat, but it wasn't normal. It was "I see you" followed with a phone call before that, he was confused and asked "?" 15 minutes later, she said that she was behind him by the gas station watching him, and he apologized saying he was focused, she said "I seen that too, and you only got to work 2 minutes late" now this would be just fun and games if she didn't work at 1pm and he started at 8:30am and she would have to go out of her way to follow him to where they work together to see when he clock's in? Is this all me overthinking? Is this considered normal? I'm starting to feel bothered by it and she also joked about "I'll murder you" ? I am very offput right now.. need advice. I don't even rem ember the joke before the murder part , my memory is so blurred cause it caught me off guard to hear it.
Edit: I also want to add she's admitted to beating her guy friend up with a actual weapon because he "annoyed her" my husband finds nothing wrong with this because the guy she beat up "instigated it" and "has a crush on her" which upset me for him to say cause it was battery either way... which I find a massive red flag for this lady. She is an alcoholic as well, often drunk when not on the clock according to what he's been told by her openly, too.

I’ve been with my husband for 2 years now, married 6 months. I caught him out in a lie last weekend and it’s unravelled so many things. So many times that I thought that what he was saying was strange, or seemed far-fetched all make sense now. The lies aren’t even big or to hide something that would hurt someone’s feelings, it’s just small stuff but the lie is what makes it huge for me.

It’s clear now that he’s a compulsive liar and I don’t know if I want to go forward with the marriage, or if there’s even any point. Can a compulsive liar ever really change?

I’ll give a couple of examples to provide a bit of context:

EXAMPLE 1
May 2022 - When we met he in May 2022, he told me he had tried to kill himself, that it was a split second decision and to never tell his parents because it would crush them. I dutifully kept his secret.
11 May 2024 - I found out that there was someone else in the car from an offhand comment made by one of his parents. When I asked him laterwhy he had lied about it, he said that he didn’t remember the crash, has no memories before or for a while after. I asked why he would try to kill himself with someone else in the car. He maintained that “it was a bit about killing myself”, before restating that he had no memory and “I don’t know what to tell you”. Very defensive, yelling and crying.
14 May 2024 - I asked him again, saying that either he has lied to me since we met, or he tried to take someone else out with him. He said he didn’t remember but that he thought it was suicide because he was so deeply unhappy at that time in his life. I said “so you tried to take your girlfriend out with you? Because that’s murder”. He then said he didnt know the real reason. I then asked why he would definitively tell me it was a suicide attempt if he didn’t know the real reason. He couldn’t tell me. I then asked why he seemed to remember specifics when I asked him at the start of the relationship (“I was driving home from dads after dinner, it was a split second decision”) but now couldn’t even tell me if it was an accident or suicide. Admitted that it was silly to claim suicide attempt, but still didnt admit to lying.

EXAMPLE 2
December 2023, - I received a black sapphire bracelet from my mum for Christmas. Boxing Day, he told me that “oh black sapphire! it’s just like the ring mum got you”. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said he didn't know. I said “no, your mum got me emerald earrings”. He said “ah yes that’s what I must have been thinking about”. I knew something was up but I left it at that because we were at family's house.
Later I asked him directly if his mum had given a black sapphire ring to his ex. He said no, he was just confused about the earrings. I said I wouldn’t care, but that I don't want to be lied to. He said no, he was just confused.
Two weeks later his mum was on the phone on speaker (she didn't realise she was on speaker) and she said “I’ve asked for that sapphire ring back from [ex] and given it to [sisterin law]”. I told him “I fucking knew it, why did you lie to me?” He said he didn't remember and that he genuinely got confused, and that he was “an idiot” for not remembering. I told him I’d be far more upset about being lied to than I would about a gift your mum gave to someone before we met. He said “I know, and that’s why I’m not lying to you!”
14 May 2024, I brought this issue up again in the context of the other lies. The conversation went like this:
Me: Why did you lie to me about that, even when your mum mentioned it?
Him: I already told you, I got confused, I totally forgot
Me: How did you forget when I asked you directly, with specifics? I asked you “Did your mum give a black sapphire ring to [ex’s name]” and you told me no.
Him: I got my wires crossed, I was talking about the earrings
Me: but you specifically mentioned a black sapphire ring, which was exactly what it was.
Him: I don’t remember who she gave it to.
Me: So you do remember there was a ring… then why didn’t it jog your memory when I asked you directly?
Him: I already apologised for this, we’ve been through this
Me: What? No, after your mum got off the phone, you told me again that you’d forgot about it and you couldn’t remember anything about it.
Him: Yeah, after the phone call with mum - we had a conversation the next day which I vividly remember where I told you I lied so as not to hurt your feelings.
I have no recollection of this conversation, but it would directly contradict claims he made seconds prior about ‘getting his wires crossed’, thinking it was about my earrings, and having no memory of it. When I asked why he had contradicted himself, he said he didn’t understand.

There are actually many more examples like this, and I can provide them if more info is needed. But over and over again, I’ve told him that I can handle the truth, but begged him not to lie to me. I caught him out in a lie in the first couple of months of us dating. When he said it was to protect my feelings, I told him that I would rather the truth than a lie from him. He promised never to lie to me again.

Over the last couple of years, he has sent me texts like:
“I felt absolutely stupid and embarrassed when I lied to you ages ago. And I told you it will not happen again. And it hasn’t.”
“I don’t lie to you”
“I’m so glad I have you. I can be my true self with you. I love the complete openness and honesty in our relationship. All we want is the best for one another”
”I asked myself something last night about us. Just in quiet reflection. Would I tell you everything and anything even if it would upset you? Like would I even make up little white lies to avoid anything crappy and I was like nah. I am cellophane with you. But frosted glass with everyone else”
“I love you so much. I promise to tell you everything and always devote myself to you”
He has repeatedly told me that he would never lie to me as “you know everything anyway, do you think I could lie to you?”

When faced with all of the above, he admits that he's got a problem with lying and says he’s turned a new leaf, that he knows what he needs to do, and that from now on it will be complete honesty. But in light of everything, how do I know that this is the truth, and not another lie?? All of my trust in him has gone, along with any respect I had for him. Everything he's saying to me just feels like lip service.

Tl;dr – husband is a compulsive liar. Can I believe him when he says he will change?

I’ve been with my husband for 2 years now, married 6 months. I caught him out in a lie last weekend and it’s unravelled so many things. So many times that I thought that what he was saying was strange, or seemed far-fetched all make sense now. The lies aren’t even big or to hide something that would hurt someone’s feelings, it’s just small stuff but the lie is what makes it huge for me.

It’s clear now that he’s a compulsive liar and I don’t know if I want to go forward with the marriage, or if there’s even any point. Can a compulsive liar ever really change?

I’ll give a couple of examples to provide a bit of context:

EXAMPLE 1
May 2022 - When we met he in May 2022, he told me he had tried to kill himself, that it was a split second decision and to never tell his parents because it would crush them. I dutifully kept his secret.
11 May 2024 - I found out that there was someone else in the car from an offhand comment made by one of his parents. When I asked him laterwhy he had lied about it, he said that he didn’t remember the crash, has no memories before or for a while after. I asked why he would try to kill himself with someone else in the car. He maintained that “it was a bit about killing myself”, before restating that he had no memory and “I don’t know what to tell you”. Very defensive, yelling and crying.
14 May 2024 - I asked him again, saying that either he has lied to me since we met, or he tried to take someone else out with him. He said he didn’t remember but that he thought it was suicide because he was so deeply unhappy at that time in his life. I said “so you tried to take your girlfriend out with you? Because that’s murder”. He then said he didnt know the real reason. I then asked why he would definitively tell me it was a suicide attempt if he didn’t know the real reason. He couldn’t tell me. I then asked why he seemed to remember specifics when I asked him at the start of the relationship (“I was driving home from dads after dinner, it was a split second decision”) but now couldn’t even tell me if it was an accident or suicide. Admitted that it was silly to claim suicide attempt, but still didnt admit to lying.

EXAMPLE 2
December 2023, - I received a black sapphire bracelet from my mum for Christmas. Boxing Day, he told me that “oh black sapphire! it’s just like the ring mum got you”. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said he didn't know. I said “no, your mum got me emerald earrings”. He said “ah yes that’s what I must have been thinking about”. I knew something was up but I left it at that because we were at family's house.
Later I asked him directly if his mum had given a black sapphire ring to his ex. He said no, he was just confused about the earrings. I said I wouldn’t care, but that I don't want to be lied to. He said no, he was just confused.
Two weeks later his mum was on the phone on speaker (she didn't realise she was on speaker) and she said “I’ve asked for that sapphire ring back from [ex] and given it to [sisterin law]”. I told him “I fucking knew it, why did you lie to me?” He said he didn't remember and that he genuinely got confused, and that he was “an idiot” for not remembering. I told him I’d be far more upset about being lied to than I would about a gift your mum gave to someone before we met. He said “I know, and that’s why I’m not lying to you!”
14 May 2024, I brought this issue up again in the context of the other lies. The conversation went like this:
Me: Why did you lie to me about that, even when your mum mentioned it?
Him: I already told you, I got confused, I totally forgot
Me: How did you forget when I asked you directly, with specifics? I asked you “Did your mum give a black sapphire ring to [ex’s name]” and you told me no.
Him: I got my wires crossed, I was talking about the earrings
Me: but you specifically mentioned a black sapphire ring, which was exactly what it was.
Him: I don’t remember who she gave it to.
Me: So you do remember there was a ring… then why didn’t it jog your memory when I asked you directly?
Him: I already apologised for this, we’ve been through this
Me: What? No, after your mum got off the phone, you told me again that you’d forgot about it and you couldn’t remember anything about it.
Him: Yeah, after the phone call with mum - we had a conversation the next day which I vividly remember where I told you I lied so as not to hurt your feelings.
I have no recollection of this conversation, but it would directly contradict claims he made seconds prior about ‘getting his wires crossed’, thinking it was about my earrings, and having no memory of it. When I asked why he had contradicted himself, he said he didn’t understand.

There are actually many more examples like this, and I can provide them if more info is needed. But over and over again, I’ve told him that I can handle the truth, but begged him not to lie to me. I caught him out in a lie in the first couple of months of us dating. When he said it was to protect my feelings, I told him that I would rather the truth than a lie from him. He promised never to lie to me again.

Over the last couple of years, he has sent me texts like:
“I felt absolutely stupid and embarrassed when I lied to you ages ago. And I told you it will not happen again. And it hasn’t.”
“I don’t lie to you”
“I’m so glad I have you. I can be my true self with you. I love the complete openness and honesty in our relationship. All we want is the best for one another”
”I asked myself something last night about us. Just in quiet reflection. Would I tell you everything and anything even if it would upset you? Like would I even make up little white lies to avoid anything crappy and I was like nah. I am cellophane with you. But frosted glass with everyone else”
“I love you so much. I promise to tell you everything and always devote myself to you”
He has repeatedly told me that he would never lie to me as “you know everything anyway, do you think I could lie to you?”

When faced with all of the above, he admits that he's got a problem with lying and says he’s turned a new leaf, that he knows what he needs to do, and that from now on it will be complete honesty. But in light of everything, how do I know that this is the truth, and not another lie?? All of my trust in him has gone, along with any respect I had for him. Everything he's saying to me just feels like lip service.
tl;dr - husband is a compulsive liar. Can I believe him when he says he will change?

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I installed the app recently after close to 3,5 years. Back then it was normal, that when you have matches, the Woman had to make the first step. But nowadays, i have plenty of matches, where i also have the opportunity to write the first message. Not with every match, but with some.
Then i asked this one girl, why she didnt text first, her reply was "Why should i lol". Isnt this the point of this app?

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If not, i highly recommend using it.
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I've come back to doing Anki as my gap year is soon done and I'm going to university.
My previous workflow was:

1. Wake up, clear flashcards throughout my morning walk + gym between sets
   
2. Come home, start learning by skimming material, write questions that come up
   
3. Start reading the material, write more questions that come up, also write questions instead of notes for things I'm learning.
   
4. Finish studying, create flashcards from all questions.
   
5. Create custom study session with all the New cards, then go out for a walk and use the New cards as prompts for explaining the concepts using the Feynman Technique
   

I'm thinking that integrating ChatGPT could streamline some of these processes, for example point 1 and 5, I could use the voice communication function in the mobile GPT app. For skimming, I could copy-paste the content (provided there aren't many diagrams, e.g tech docummentation) and ask GPT to skim it for me, then read the output. For writing questions, I could copy-paste the text material to ChatGPT and ask to create flashcards based on the 20 rules.
This has awesome potential and I've tried it for a few days and I enjoy it. Thus, I'm interested how do you use ChatGPT (if you do) in your workflow. I'm wondering if implementing programming practice has worked for anyone (cards that one can do only with a laptop and access to an IDE)

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I texted someone, blocked him, then unblocked im and texted with him again. When I tried to download all messages, I hot only the newest ones.
I chose to fownload the data from the last 3 years so its not the timing.
I also got the chats with other people I've blocked, so it just seems very odd and I need those chats URGENTLY.