Hello all! I’m looking for some recommendations about the next card to add to my travel portfolio. In particular, I’m traveling to 3 countries in Europe late August/early September and would like to cover as much of it on points as I possibly can. Especially hotel rooms as the price of those can add up quickly. Including my credit profile below to help with recommendations.
CREDIT PROFILE

• Current credit cards you are the primary account holder of: Two non-travel cards opened in mid 2019 and April 2023 and a Chase Sapphire Preferred opened January this year with a combined credit limit of $21,500
  
• FICO Scores with source: My experian score about a month ago was 687 but have since seen a large boost in other scores. Transunion and Equifax are both around 760
  
• Number of personal credit cards approved for in the past 6 months: 1
  
• Number of personal credit cards approved for in the past 12 months: 1 technically (one was late April 2023)
  
• Number of personal credit cards approved for in the past 24 months: 2
  
• Annual income $: 75k
  

CATEGORIES

• OK with category-specific cards?: I think so but would prefer not to have an annual fee if it’s category specific
• OK with rotating category cards?: Not preferable
• Estimate average monthly spend in the categories below. Only include what you can pay by credit card.
• Dining $: $200
• Groceries $: $250 of which $50 is spent at Costco and or BJs
• Gas $: Ranges from $80-$250 depending on the month. No more than half would be purchased at Costco or BJs
• Travel $: I don’t spend on travel regularly really. Only when I’m preparing for a trip but I currently set aside about $200/mo to spend on trips when they come up
• Do you plan on using this card abroad for a significant length of time (study abroad, digital nomad, expat, extended travel)?: I’m specifically looking for a card for this week long Europe trip but am looking to try digital nomading later this year so would be nice to choose a card I can use for that and keep long term
• Any other categories (examples: phone/internet, insurance) or stores (example: Amazon) with significant, regular credit card spend (the more you specify, the better): $ My 6 month car insurance payment is coming up and is around $1K. I would love to get the most points/value possible out of this
• Any other significant, regular credit card spend you didn't include above?: I am able to and usually do put $350-$400 of monthly expenses on my card in addition to groceries (parking, internet, etc.)
• Can you pay rent by credit card? If yes, list rent amount and if there's a fee for paying by credit card: $ Technically yes but the fee is around $50 MEMBERSHIPS & SUBSCRIPTIONS (delete lines that don't apply)
  
• Current member of Amazon Prime?: No
  
• Current Verizon postpaid customer?: No
  
• Current member of Costco or Sam's Club? Free Costco Membership and annual BJs membership
  

PURPOSE

• What's the purpose of your next card (choose ONE)?: Travel rewards
• If you answered "travel rewards", do you have a preferred airline and/or hotel chain? Not really. I’ve come to like Hyatt since having the Chase Sapphire Preferred since they have a published chart and a good point valuation but open to others
• Do you have any cards you've been looking at? Thinking about Amex gold, Hilton Honors Surpass, Marriott Bonvoy Boundless and the World of Hyatt card to a lesser extent (the sign up bonus feels kind of low)

I think I might be going through a situation about overly investing.
So I am 21 and I am trying to pursue a guy who pursued me first for a relationship. He said he not gonna put his all in the beginning of getting to know someone mind you I have been talking to him for 2 months slowly building to 3 at this point and we have never once had a date at no type of restaurant we only got food while we was in the car I am trying to sit back and analyze b/c what he is saying and doing is not aligning either, like he has said we where going to do something or made me a promise and never fulfilled either but I see him periodically throughout the week also he be on my side of town down the street even and will pass me up and go straight home like I genuinely feel like he is not interested but then he expresses and explains to me he has a lot going on which is true he is fighting a case since 17 up into 24 now 🤦🏽‍♀️and I reason b/c it’s like I don’t know what mentally this person is facing yet along truly going through I am very conflicted as to if he wants to engage a relationship with me or not. I have expressed my feelings and he has even apologized to me about it and explained why and that he is not trying to make me feel this way he does also I just be feeling like I am a second thought .and him being busy appears to be related to his current circumstances and what he is facing. At this point idk how to access this situation one side is convinced he is not interested and the other maybe he is interested.

Aquarius Man

Aquarius Women

Relationship Advice

I just got hired for a hostess job in the city (yay)! But the place is more upscale, so the dress code is formal and sneakers are not allowed, which makes me think clogs and the like are not acceptable either. Does anyone have any recommendations for comfortable but stylish women’s shoes that I could purchase?

So I’m 21 now, but when I was 17 my period never came. Throughout my whole teen hood I was wondering when it would come. All my friends have had their periods and you don’t hear many stories of girls having their first periods after 14. I started doing a lot of digging online about not having a period yet and I got very scared. Because I know I want kids when I’m older and I got scared something was wrong. I finally went to the gynecologist at 17. Thankfully everything seemed fine, but she just said I wasn’t ovulating. They ended up giving me a pill for me to take for a week to start my period. After that I had to take the birth control pill to keep my period. I called it my man-made period lol. Now in January/February I stopped taking the pill and it’s been coming natural.
When I didn’t have my period I would talk to basically every women in my life about it. It was something I very much worried about. What pisses me off is now that I have it I complain like every other female who has periods, but my family & some close friends act like I can’t complain. They just tell me “Well you wanted this.” No I didn’t want to feel like crap for a week and have cramps where it feels like someone is tap dancing on my uterus. I just wanted to be normal woman who will be able to have kids in the future. It’s just so frustrating when other women especially close relative/friends say I can’t complain or tell me “well this is what you wanted.”

Bf vomiting LOTS. It is all red. He did have a glass of V8.
He’s let go of so much vomit. I thought he vomited all the liquid he had and there was more, then retching. All opaque red.
Has had stomach pain and cramping in the lower abdomen for four days. Today has pain in his middle abdomen.
History of recurring diffuse diverticulitis both sides. Gastritis as well. Chronic bloating.
Lithium, lamotrigine, synthroid, krestor, loxapine, gabapentin. Puffers for COPD. Maxes them out and still his lungs crackle when he breathes. BPD, Hashimoto’s, hypothyroidism, what else I can’t remember.
He INSISTS it’s a “stomach bug” from a salad he had two days ago.
But he’s had pain for four. Has had cramping in lower abdomen as well. Diarrhea. Food makes him uncomfortable, . Says it doesn’t quite feel like diverticulitis.
Refuses to go to hospital or call a doctor.
Still has a lung infection he got a few weeks ago. Had a fever for a full week. Did ask GP for antibiotics early on, GP refused. Bad smoker. His respiration rate right now is 29. He is almost always tachycardic at rest.
He’s 50. 250 lbs 5’9. Cigarettes and weed all day.

I have come across multiple opinions from both Blacks and Greens over the true reason why Aegon and Viserys never attempted to remove the Usurper from the line of kings, especially when in the appendix Aegon III’s claim is him as a “Son of Rhaenyra” and it even says Aegon II’s ascent was “disputed by his half-sister Rhaenyra…” and his claim supposedly comes from being the “Son of Viserys I”.
The most logical answer to this question is that GRRM wrote the Appendix of Kings at the back of the first published GoT books because it was an easy bit of world building, and as he fleshed out the Dance years later it was too much of a hassle to retcon/rewrite the line of kings. This can be seen in the way he changed Rhaenyra from being one year the elder and presumably a full blooded sibling to Aegon, to ten years his elder and a half-sibling. A small change that impacts a barely fleshed out story, compared to large one in changing the line of kings. Could he have never wanted Rhaenyra on the throne in the first place? Possibly, but we won’t know.
In-universe, I believe there is a nuanced and rather historically adjacent reason for this. Perhaps not the one GRRM thought up when he wrote F&B (and F&B2 if we ever get there…), but the one I believe to be plausible. Some Greens like to say Aegon III and Viserys II agreed with the rights of male-only succession, as seen with Viserys taking the throne over Daena the Defiant (which by Andal right, should have been hers…)
So, I present the relationship of Queen Elizabeth I of England and her mother, Anne Boleyn on the argument of Rhaenyra’s recognized title as Queen:
Tracey Borman notes that “the many references that Elizabeth made to her ‘dearest father,’ and the way in which she tried to emulate his style of monarchy when she became queen, all support this view. By contrast, Elizabeth is commonly said to have referred directly to Anne only twice throughout her long life. She made no attempt to overturn the annulment of her mother’s marriage or to have her reburied in more fitting surrounds than the Tower of London chapel, knowing that this would court controversy—literally, digging up a past that was best forgotten. Neither did she challenge her mother’s conviction. The obvious conclusion is that Elizabeth was at best indifferent towards, and at worst ashamed of Anne.”
The italicized sentences stuck out to me because that’s essentially what Aeg and Vis did. Seemingly. they made no attempt to put Rhaenyra back into the line of succession and recognize her as queen. Did they agree with Aegon II’s and his council’s belief that women could not ascend to the throne? Is that why? Her bones were interred into the Royal Sept, so that is a departure from the source which states Queen Elizabeth did no such thing, but there is no evidence of her bones being put there by Aeg and Vis during their reigns so we can’t know for certain. But as Tracy Borman notes for Elizabeth, it can be concluded that it is mostly likely because of the controversy surrounding the Dance and Rhaenyra that Aeg and Vis didn’t put her in as Queen.
Decades later, when another succession crisis came in the form of Viserys II and Daena the Defiant, the memories of the Dance were still fresh on everyone’s minds. It was only centuries later that another female Targaryen would even be made heir: Aelora. So it can be assumed that Aegon and Viserys never placed Rhaenyra back into the line of succession because of controversy. Yes, Aegon could have done it once his regency ended, and yes Viserys could have done it as well, but as exampled it is a lot more nuanced than simply having them take away Aegon II and Helaena’s usurping titles.
Now onto the argument of Aegon III and Viserys II somehow hating their mother to the point of agreeing with male-only succession:
While Queen Elizabeth mostly praised her father in public, her love of Anne was kept to private ventures such as the “chequers ring” which Elizabeth kept with her even as she neared death. It was a ring with rubies and diamonds that “reveal two portraits: one is of Elizabeth I; the other is thought to be of her mother, Anne Boleyn…When closed, the two portraits Almost touch: face to face, mother to mother.”
Queen Elizabeth’s mother Anne Boleyn was an extremely controversial figure. Anne was called “the concubine” and “the great whore,” even after her death, much like Rhaenyra was remembered. Similarly, Aegon III wore black all his life. He was a ghostly figure, and was traumatized by all that had happened to him. Perhaps he did not keep any mementos of Rhaenyra close to him, but I would argue that the great sadness he carried with him shows that he was rather devoted to his mother, even if he couldn’t show that in public. The dragons died out during his reign, which I would add as a twisted memento of Rhaenyra. The animals that caused her death were now all dead…and that is his way of keeping her with him. He avenged her in a way.
Moreover, “Elizabeth was less than three years old when the Calais swordsman severed her mother’s head at the Tower of London…”
Elizabeth was only three, but she still kept mementos and seemingly loved her in private?
Viserys II would have little memory of his mother. Anything he knew of her and his eldest three brothers would have come from those at court, Baela, Rhaena, or Aegon. Just like Elizabeth would have learned of Anne from dubious sources. I don’t see him having felt any strong hatred or indifference toward his mother, because even with how distant royal parents were they still cared, and the children wanted to be cared for. Similarly with Elizabeth being so young yet able to have such a great private affection for Anne, I believe Vis would have too. Perhaps he did “usurp” Daena in a way. But can we honestly say that a teen would have been better than a man with years of experience as Hand (love you Daena stay iconic)? Can we say that when people still have memories of the Dance decades later they’d want a woman on the throne? That doesn’t point to a belief in male-only succession, that points to a fear of history repeating.
So, to me, I believe the matter of succession is as it’s always been: nuanced. Rhaenyra was an incredible mother, and I don’t believe Aegon, the boy who mourned for her all his life and couldn’t stand to be near anyone, much less the simple girl he was forced to marry, would have hated her. I believe he knew what a tenuous situation he was in, similar to Elizabeth she was made illegitimate and the years her younger brother Edward ruled with his regents. Viserys may have been young when he was captured, but he served the realm well and I dont believe he would have zero interest in his mother. If Aegon II gets a pass for being a neglected and abused baby, I believe the real victims should get a little lenience too.
Plus, Elizabeth wasnt the feminist many assume she is…so while yes Aeg and Vis upheld patriarchal ideology (how is that a win for the Greens? Misogynist ahhs), they are upholding a system that has been around longer than they have. I dont blame them completely.
There were, of course, multiple other factors at play but this is just my thoughts that GRRM most likely wasn’t thinking of when he wrote F&B LOL.
TLDR: IRL History proves that Aegon and Viserys’ actions are nuanced, Rhaenyra deserves to have seen her boys grow up, and the Greens are delulu

https://reddit.com/link/1crj0ze/video/3mrecblpeb0d1/player
Today I was at the Blair bus stop just minding my own business when out of nowhere a bunch of smoke comes right up to my face. This man is smoking at a bus stop. Never mind the fact that you’re not allowed to smoke at a bus stop, the fact that it was coming up to my face was what was bothering me, so I took a video of this man.
This man gets angry and starts walking up to me and trying to intimidate me and starts telling me he is allowed to smoke and that I am not allowed to take a picture of him, even though the opposite is true. We start arguing and its clear that he has no clue about any law, so I say there is no point in having this conversation. Then he cursed at me and he throws his lit cigarette at me. My bus comes and I inform the bus driver and she says I would have to wait for security, like wtf am I supposed to wait here alone at night with this unhinged man?
Oh btw this is not the first time, the last officer told me they don’t really enforce the smoking fine, wtf.
I just spoke to an officer he was really nice and friendly but basically informed me that even if they caught him, the only thing that can happen to him is that he gets fined by OC transport for smoking as the system is so backed up that they would not bother with something like this. . In fact he even said the if someone punched me but I was not hurt that the system wouldn’t bother with it. So basically, you can assault someone and get away with it in Canada. I have a longer video of us arguing but I’m not sure if it’s worth adding.
I’m posting this in case others have similar problems in the future or with the same guy

THIS IS JUST A RANT
I just recently joined a small local law firm as an intern, and I'm miserable. I decided to intern before starting law school, and all the firms I applied to were notified about this matter.However, I'm ready to learn.
The first few days were okay-ish; people were "nice.". However, as the days progress, everyone just seems to have their own circle of "friends.". I do have someone to talk to too, a dude sitting next to me in a different row, and another dude who is sitting across from me.
I admit I made a lot of mistakes in my first few weeks,but I took all the changes as advice. I came in late due to vehicular issues or a Microsoft Word error. I thought it was okay as the others would come in late as well (the pupil of Chambers and the lawyers) and try ducking away from the boss's view (if he is in), then they would laugh about it among each other. However, I was advised otherwise by my superior. Now that I come an hour earlier than the others, I would read, scroll on social media, study, or whatever to pass the time until 9 am (work hour), and if I was late, I would inform my superior. Even during lunch time, I would be back as early as I could so I wouldn't be in trouble, but the others would sometimes be back 30 minutes late to the office, laughing away with their bobba tea in hand. I also apply to some Microsoft Word classes to improve my MW usage so I won't make so many useless mistakes and be a burden.
I was put under conveyancing,which I had never studied before, so to prepare myself, I self-studied and hired a tutor to help me understand better.
Next, I realised I don't get to do certain things unlike the others ( Pupil in Chambers (PIC), certain lawyers/paralegals) . At first, I thought it was due to the fact that I was still new and just an intern. However, they get away with more things, but I get in trouble if I do them. What annoys me is that some joined the firm only a month before me, and they are already "buddy-buddy" with the lawyers.
Next dilemma: I was told that everyone was going on a work trip that week, which at the time I thought was just the bosses and the executive lawyers, but it turns out it's everyone, including the staff and pupils in chambers. I was stuck with a lawyer who chose to stay behind. OFC, I had some issues with MW, which I tried the hardest to research on Google, YouTube, and even call some friends for help, but to no avail, and I was upfront about it to the lawyer I was aiding. Obviously, I got in trouble the next week when my supervisor was back. Hence, I applied for courses after working in MS so I could enhance my skills and be useful to my superiors, so I wouldn't get that resentful and disappointed look from my superiors. Also, I didn't get to do anything that day; heck, I even asked people in the office if they needed any help (desk to desk , email and text, but was sadly ignored) .
When they got back from the trip, I realised they were closer to each other—heck, even with the bosses. I tried making friends but I seem to be getting ignored except by those 2 guys. Hence, I speak to the lawyers in a formal way, even though the secretary told me it was okay to talk on a first-name basis. I won't do so until they tell me it's okay, even towards the firm's secretary.
During lunch, I am lonely too. They would go eat together (except for a few who decided to stay behind to eat or chill in the office), and I was never invited, unlike when I was on my first day. Most of the lawyers are ladies (late 20's to early 30's, I think). From experience, women tend to be meaner to other ladies if you are not up to par with them. However, in the past, working with men was a different story; they were somehow more welcoming and pleasant to work with.
This morning, I got told to stop speaking with one of the PICs because she was trying to "concentrate.". Bitch gets to laugh and talk as loud as she wants when others are working but I can't? I use my earphones to muffle the sound if things gets loud. I used to be excited to come to work, but now I feel dread. I was contracted to be with the firm for 4 months, but now I somehow slightly regret joining the firm. I don't want to quit because its barely been 1-2 months, and I don't want to be a pussycat by crying about it or quitting (despite wanting to cry in the toilet stalls during lunch break).
Also,I don't always get tasks to do; I feel isolated, and everything I do seems to never be good enough. Despite all of this, I somehow still have the urge to learn and be helpful. So I filled my time studying and out of trouble. I try so hard to behave and do my work right so I won't be picked on or chastised by my superiors. Im getting diarrhoea thinking about it. The bright side about this firm is that they're pretty lenient, unlike other firms.
I know I can be a problem, so I try to mend my mistakes. The advice and feedback help, and I stay in my lane. What I understand is that I'm an intern at the bottom of the totem pole, especially given the fact that I'm not in school yet and that I'm slightly older (started later due to COVID). To them, I am a dog, and when they tell me to bark, I bark. Since I will be a dog for the next 4 months, I decided to be a Golden Retriever—helpful, friendly, and always ready to please and learn. I am learningto learn by showing a brave face and cry at home. I have to walk off the pain and all fo this will be just a memory. Luckily, the pay is good, and I need this for CV purposes.

He was a weird, sexist, “boss first” manager, which checks off a few things in Michael’s tangent. For the short duration he was in the show, he clearly emphasized how little of a personal relationship he wanted with everyone, i.e him not wanting anyone to “figure him out”. Also, because of how quickly and easily he pushed Jim out of the inner circle (which doesn’t exist) proves he didn’t have much a personal relationship with him in the first place
He was also an ‘ogre’ who didn’t like the women just because they were women
Basically my point is, I think he we was brought in to really push just how good Michael was. Or it was just bad writing, idk

michael since you like to read in here and go on tiktok/youtube playing victim id like to remind you why you have a snark page dedicated to you!
let’s point out the obvious, the porn. we do not judge ones who do only fans… its the incest, child look, and posting as a trans but getting offended for being misgendered. its one thing to keep your private life away from social media but the problem is you had your private life plastered all over your socials AND you chose to get on certain social medias during work replying with suggestive responses in the presence of children (also claiming to be hard at work… around children) this is not normal and could’ve put you on the list so be thankful that person only brought that to the attention of the daycare and not the police.
you are self centered, another word could be narcissistic but sometimes we don’t understand to the full capacity what that word means so let me put it in small boy terms! you only think about you and you cling on to being the center of attention in perfect lighting (meaning when someone sees you a little differently you’ll get frustrated and attempt to make sure no one gets the drift and feels the same as they do) perfect example is you deleting comments, switching the narrative by making a tiktok with not even partially the truth, and portraying yourself as someone else to get someone to like you. this is all toxic behavior especially to yourself because you lose who you are. it’s easy to lie and kick dust over it than to tell the truth and let the rocks hit the glass house you’ve built from being honest and transparent.
this one is rough to even talk about because of how disgusting and disrespectful it is, acting like a woman but getting mad because misgendering occurred. we’ve put it together that you hate women because your ex cheated on you with one but let me be very clear, you are obsessed. the way you act like us is crazy and calling us bitches is even crazier because how are you going to hate when you can’t even get on our level? you’ve made it clear that you think it’s okay to mock trans women as well so tell me michael how are you going to hate when you can’t even get in? your “fans” which i won’t say anything rude because i was one before i did some research but they haven’t yet and they’re only hearing one side. you treat them like a typical man that tries manipulate women and i’m going to end this topic on that because i could say so much more.
you need help because constantly posting about your ex and how he cheated, going shopping 24/7, and isolating yourself isn’t healthy. learn to love and appreciate women because yes one had your ex but it doesn’t sound or even look like he was yours from the beginning and it still doesn’t make all women bad. discipline yourself as well because this victim facade is annoying, learn to take accountability. i’ve noticed on every snark page ive seen half the members want to see accountability taken and the person to seek help. we just state what bothers us, things we see as offensive or just rude in manner wise. things always come to light and no one is perfect but some things shouldn’t be done and it’s definitely a common sense thing.
that’s all for now but id love to hear from other members on this!

When I was watching the pre-game show on Sunday, KJ made a light hearted comment about Ashfin Ghotbi’s “ World class” comment about the new CB & suggested historically Ghotbi’s quotes were sometimes a little OTT and kept the media department busy. So for a bit of fun I googled his quotes on other players and found the following which in hindsight now are quite ironic.
Pele Martinez
“Реlе іmрrеѕѕеd mе іmmеdіаtеlу wіth hіѕ аthlеtісіѕm аnd реrѕоnаlіtу,” ѕаіd Аfѕhіn Ghоtbі, Vаnсоuvеr FС Неаd Соасh.
“А grеаt сhаrасtеr іn thе lосkеr rооm, Реlе mаkеѕ еvеrуоnе bеttеr аrоund hіm. Не іѕ а bоrn lеаdеr whо wіll ѕооn bе а fаn fаvоurіtе іn thе СРL.”
MARTINEZ subsequently left the club by mutual agreement midway through 2023.
Amir Kinani
He has an eye and nose for the goal, making him an exciting addition to our squad," said Vancouver head coach, Afshin Ghotbi, about Kinani. "VFC fans are in for a treat, watching the evolution of a true goal scorer."
KINANI was released at the end of 2023.
Nima Zadeh
Nima is a classic midfielder with a high football IQ, tireless work rate and box-to-box range,” Ghotbi said. “He will soon be recognized by many as one of the best midfielders in Canada due to his qualities with and without the ball.”
ZADEH was released at the end of 2023 and hardly played a minute after mid season
Marcus Simmons
We are pleased to welcome Marcus to our group,” said Afshin Ghotbi, head coach of Vancouver FC. “Marcus showed promise in his first season as a professional and we believe there is even more to come for him as he begins to work in this new environment in Langley.”
SIMMONS subsequently left the club by mutual consent midway through 2023.
Mamadou Kane
“I am pleased to welcome Mamadou to our growing group of players,” said Afshin Ghotbi, Head Coach, Vancouver FC. “Mamadou is an exciting young talent with the drive to excel. With a year under his belt in the Canadian Premier League, he has developed a good understanding of what it takes to succeed in this game. I look forward to seeing the strides he can make in 2023 as he continues to evolve in our environment.”
KANE was a striker, who was famously played as a CB and then left the club by Mutual consent at the beginning of 2024.
Gael Sandoval
Gael is our most exciting signing in our young history, as he brings with him the tradition and pedigree of world-renowned Chivas and other well-known Mexican clubs,” said Ghotbi. “Gael’s creativity, combined with his football IQ, will influence games, while the qualities he possesses on and off the field are sure to make his teammates around him better.”
SANDOVAL left the club by mutual consent midway through the 2023 season.
Mael Henry and Cristian Mares
Maël and Cristian are both young players with lots of potential,” said Afshin Ghotbi, Head Coach, Vancouver FC. “I look forward to putting them both in the best situations to challenge them and continue their development this season.”
MARES was returned to parent club less than 6 weeks after signing and HENRY was traded to Cavalry mid season 2023.
Nicky Gymah
“We are thrilled to introduce to the CPL an exciting winger with pace, creativity and precision in the danger area,” said Ghotbi. “He definitely will be a fan favourite with his ability to create scoring opportunities for himself and his teammates.”
GYMAH left by mutual consent in 2023
Nathanial St Louis
Nathaniel is an exciting young left-footed attacker who is goal dangerous with or without the ball thanks to his vertical movement,” said Afshin Ghotbi, Head Coach, Vancouver FC. “He has a bright future in the Canadian Premier League and beyond.”
ST LOUIS was released at the end of 2023
Emmanuel robe
We are thrilled to improve our selection with the signing of Emmanuel,” said Afshin Ghotbi, Head Coach, Vancouver FC. “He is a natural goal scorer who combines his athleticism with a decisive final touch. He can combine in the smallest spaces and beat most of his opponents with his world-class pace.”
ROBE left the club by mutual consent during the 2023 season
Ibrahim Bakare
We are thrilled to introduce a fantastic defender in Ibrahim, who possesses personality, quality and experience beyond his young age,” said Afshin Ghotbi, Head Coach, Vancouver FC. “His power, athleticism and versatility will make him a valuable addition to our squad.
BAKARE left by mutual consent at the beginning of the 2024 season.
All 12 either had contracts mutually terminated or not signed for a second season.
I just hope the “ I think you are looking at a championship winning team” quote to season ticket holders at the kit launch is the one he finally gets right !

Hi everyone! I’m looking for advice for next Thursday May 23. I will be going to the parks with my dad. I go to the parks often as a Magic Key holder and I am excited to go with him. He went to Disneyland twice last year but has not gone to DCA since 2015. When we went in 2015 it was raining and the experience was definitely affected by the weather. He’s not a big coastethrill person (Incredicoaster or Guardians) so I am wondering if you all think that it’s better to get a park hopper or just DCA. I know he’ll love things such as the Animation Academy, Soarin, Racers, getting drinks at Lamplight Lounge, World of Color, the Incredicoaster launch, he enjoys wine so he’ll love Sonoma Terrace, etc. but I am not sure how much else we can do the whole day. Would it be better to enjoy DCA as much as we can or hop over and do some of his favorites such as Pirates and Small World? I’m definitely conflicted and don’t know what is better. If we do park hoppers, should we start at Disneyland and then hop over or vise versa? I know that it will be a grad nite day so how will crowds affect this? Looking forward to hearing what you all think!

TL;DR- How do I break it to clingy, super dependent, mentally abusive long-term partner that I don't want to get back together, and get the last of my stuff back from him while living on another continent?
My husband and I met online and have been together for 10 years. In hindsight the first red flag was the age gap/potential grooming, the second was probably how he wanted to bond over mutual mental illnes diagnoses right away. He's always been very clingy and dependant on me to 'talk him through his episodes' and essentially be his manic pixie dreamgirl to help fix him. He thought it was romantic that I'd stay up late talking him out of suicide, whereas I found it traumatizing and exhausting, especially when I had school or work the next day, but I thought that was part of being a supportive partner.
As time went on and the relationship grew, he wanted to spend all his time with me and his friends reached out less and less to the point that I was eventually the only person who talked to him, which he happily reminded me of whenever he felt I wasn't making enough time for him (read: all of my free time) and would guilt me with 'at least I got to talk to other people at work'. It became an unspoken expectation that unless I was at work, showering, or asleep I should be next to him keeping him company or else he'd feel rejected.
Eventually he complained I was sleeping too much as well, '10 hours is really excessive and unhealthy, I found this article that says 7 hours should be plenty for women in your agegroup. You should start setting an alarm so you don't oversleep.' Even though he would regularly wake me up at 4am to make him food because 'yeahh, but it tastes so much better when [I] do it', regardless if I had to be at work for 8 sharp. He'd even get angry with me for nodding off on the couch before midnight because 'clearly [I] just don't want to be around him so much [I'd] rather be asleep!'
He also saw nothing wrong with waking me up after a few hours of sleep to have important discussions about 'where we stand in our relationship', or just to keep him company. If I was irritated or wanted to save the conversation for morning/after work then I was being 'so cold to him when he just wanted to spend time with me' or 'I clearly don't care about our relationship anymore.'
5 years into living together, 3 of them married, I had several breakdowns and moved back in with my mom in my home country. Unfortunately after I got to my moms I chose to call him to tell him I was done and we were over, and he used the opportunity to play every manipulation tactic in the playbook. The same guy who, just days earlier, told me to 'stop with the crocodile tears, you'll get no sympathy from me' was now hysterically sobbing, begging me for another chance.
He claimed had no idea he made me feel so horribly, he was so sorry, he just wanted one more chance to have his wife back, didn't he deserve that much? I was his only family! How cruel could I be to leave without telling him what he did wrong and not let him redeem himself?? He swore he'd never raise his voice to me again, was 3 bad years really all it took to erase the 7 amazing previous years??' And of course you already know he heavily implied not being able to live without me 🙄
Sadly, because he knows what buttons to push, he got me to 'agree' not to end things, but to "take this separation period to work on us" while I saved up for a visa to come back to him so he could have his second chance. But 'thankfully', because he asks me to send him money for groceries and occasional utilities since he's on a fixed income and I halved the household income when I "abandoned him", (my countrys currency is also roughly half the value of his- on a good day) I haven't been able to save a penny so far and have had the last eight months to realise I don't actually want this.
I don't think I'm obligated to make myself get over hearing the love of my life call me vile names, like a "worthless stupid c*nt who wastes the air she breathes" for forgetting to get his cigarettes from the store, just because he realises his actions have consequences. He should know not to speak like that to someone he's supposed to care about. I don't think me no longer feeling comfortable around him or looking forward to talking to him anymore is a punishment against him, or something to 'work on' so much as a natural reaction; I wouldn't expect warmth from someone who threatened to knock me out for being annoying, and its not petty to extend the same attitude toward him for the same threat.
So now with that discovery realised, and the some background context laid out, here's the crux of my problem-
How do I inform him that, although he has spent the last 8 months believing I've forgiven him, had mostly gotten over my 'issues' from our fallout, and was still planning to save up for this visa to 'come home'; I have no desire to do any of that anymore, and actually plan to file for divorce in the next 5 months instead.
---preferrably without him doing a complete 180 and become an manipulative dickhead who sends me dozens of snapchats a day of him crying so hard he gags (again..), and convince me to send me the last box of my stuff that I wasn't able to grab as I left. Unfortunately its all sentimental items from deceased relatives or I truly wouldn't bother, I'm happy and willing to pay the cost of him shipping it to me of course.
When I originally told him I wasn't coming back and requested he send me my things he refused and claimed he "couldn't bear" to walk around the house and box up "precious reminders of me" and made himself sick hyperventilating on the phone. I just want my stuff so I can go no contact 😅.

I’m 19 (M) and I just don’t know what to do. I failed high school (I was homeschooled btw). I need to get a job, get my license, and get my GED. I’m not making excuses but I’m fairly sure I have ADHD, when I was little a therapist or psychologist was certain I had ADD (outdated medical term now) but we never followed up for any test or diagnosis. I can only really focus on things I enjoy, everything else is a struggle. I zone out constantly, everything online that I read about ADHD literally makes be feel like I’m reading a book about myself.
After a certain point I was expected to pretty much do everything education wise on my own and I just really fell behind and struggled. I have a lot of anxiety about everything. The thought of working a job scares me especially because I’m 19 with absolutely no work experience, I feel like I’m going not going to be a valuable employee and nobody will think I’m worthwhile.
I’m also gay but I definitely don’t feel comfortable about that, I was raised Christian and just don’t know how to feel. I’ve felt this way since I was around 12-13 and I just honestly wish I wasn’t like this, I’ve never felt attracted to women at all but I’m not telling anyone, I don’t ever plan on telling anyone although there have been signs about myself that made me realize I’ve always been this way.
The last 4 years I’ve just gotten worse. I’ve struggled with certain things and have kinda stopped valuing my life. I’m starting to not care anymore, driving used to terrify me and but nothing scares me anymore only because I don’t really care. Last three years I’ve started this downward spiral of certain thoughts, I’ve been telling myself that I’m just looking for attention or it’s just self pity but I don’t know, nobody knows about this at least not to my knowledge. I’ve done some things a few months ago but haven’t really done them again, I think about it every day though. It just doesn’t feel like things are going to get better. From what I’ve heard working sounds so depressing, getting the ged feels like an impossible task.
Idk what I’m doing here, maybe I’m just looking for attention. Right now I don’t plan on doing anything,I’m not at that point yet but I don’t know how much longer I can keep dealing with this.

I was at .25 for four weeks then .5 for 12 weeks. 255 when I started and I’m 241 now.
I’ve tolerated the drug quite well. Had some nausea and even got the dry heaves once while waiting for a train, but no serious issues or hospital visits yet.
My A1C had improved but the doc wanted to see more, so he upped my dose to 1mg and I’ll be honest that I was really stressed about it. Mostly because I was afraid that I would start seeing some of the more serious side effects.
But it has been okay! I just took my third injection at this dosage and no serious issues. I have really noticed a drop off in my appetite as the day progresses. I can eat a normal portion of breakfast, but I won’t be hungry for lunch for much longer and I’ll eat smaller portions. Then when dinner rolls around I will eat even less.
I’m posting this because before I took my first shot at the new dosage I tried looking around for stories from men who were going through the same thing and I didn’t find much. I have no idea if the drug affects men and women differently but for some reason that’s what I went looking for to get some kind of reassurance.
Anyway. It worked. It’s working. I’m okay, and I hope you are too.

I (25 NB) met my friend (26 NB) at work, we have the same position at work and usually end up paired with each other. We get along great and have a lot of similar interests. I’ve given them rides home from work a lot cause we live near each other, and I thought we’d developed a strong friendship. They’ve worked at the company a little longer than I have, I’ve been working there since August. We’ve only been friends really since Januaryish when I got promoted.
Anyways they kept requesting we hang out together outside of work, I didn’t see this as odd because we’ve hung out together outside of work as a friend group, I have many friends at my job and we usually do group outings or parties, so it wasn’t odd to me that they wanted to hang out. The day they wanted to go out, none of my roommates were available to go with. 2 out of 3 of my roommates (25 M, 23 F and 25 M) work at the same business. So I went with them on my own, they seemed ecstatic that it was just the 2 of us. I picked them up and we initially just planned to go to the mall. We walked around, talked, bought stuff and eventually had lunch.
They kept staring at me which I found awkward but figured because we’re both autistic that I was uncomfortable with the eye contact or they just happen to make a lot of eye contact. They also keep walking really close to me and “accidentally” bumping my hand. After the mall they still wanted to hang out so we went to the thrift store and had a lot of fun making fun of the silly knick knacks, we both love Fallout New Vegas so they were looking for a jacket that looked like Benny Geckos from the game.
After that they still wanted to keep hanging out, at this point I was pretty tired but figured we were having fun. It’s hard for me to say no, and I use a cane for chronic pain so I usually need to take a frequent number of breaks which we hadn’t done yet but they hadn’t picked up that I was tired yet. I was having fun and at this point they did apologize about keeping me out for so long, I said it’s ok because I like long friendship hangout days, which is not a lie, my body just doesn’t enjoy it as much.
Next we went to get boba and they bought me a drink, at this point they had paid for none of my stuff, we split the food earlier and I lightheartedly threatened them to not spend money on me. When we were in the boba shop, they once again kept staring and moving their hand towards mine. I deterred this because it made me uncomfortable by talking with my hands which I usually do anyways. They were nice and listened to me infodump to them about tmnt (tmnts my special interest) but still continued their staring. I kept getting in my head that they were just being nice and I was ruining things thinking that they had ulterior motives.
I forgot to mention that they have a boyfriend (27 M), but they had offhandingly mentioned that they were poly. We then went to a gaming shop to look at dnd and pathfinder stuff, I had to pee incredibly badly at this point but they ignored my subtle pleas to leave, which understandably was my fault as I said I could hold it at the boba shop.
At this point I’m exhausted and in a lot of pain so I suggested we end our hang out after finding a bathroom. They still insisted on hanging out longer so I suggested they come to my apartment cause at this point I’d run out of stuff for us to do. This is where things got a bit uncomfy. My roommates were all home at this point but all left briefly to go pick up food. My roommate who I share a room with requested I don’t bring my friend into our room while she was in there, but gave me the go ahead to show them our room once she and my other roommates left to get their food.
I like showing my friends my collections whenever they come over so I saw no inappropriate reason to do the same. I have some Dnd, Fallout and Tmnt stuff I wanted to show them. I did my normal showing off my stuff thing. At some point I walked them over to my desk to show them my figurines, my desk is in a corner by my closet and bed so you can only go up to it from 1 side, I talked for a bit and noticed I was cornered. I have past trauma and hate being cornered, I kept making attempts to hint that I wanted to get out of the corner but they stayed firmly in place, even leaning with their hand on my desk to further block me in which I thought was strange.
Eventually I manage to slip by them by saying I wanted to show them my shelf on the opposite side of the room. The shelf is lower and next to my bed so I sit down to point things out. They then ask if they can sit down as well. I say yes and they proceed to sit down directly next to me, our thighs are touching firmly and they lean in on my bed with their arm behind me. I’m once again cornered and panicked now. I have a thing with my thighs where I HATE anyone touching them, it causes a violent reaction, my brain screams at me to bite, punch or claw anyone who touches them, I feel sick and absolutely enraged whenever it happens. I’ve been SAed in the past but even before that I had that reaction, my therapist says it might be a trauma response from childhood that I don’t remember.
I didn’t want to hurt them and luckily I have the violent outbursts completely under control so I just stiffened up and internalized the rage while trying to steady my breathing. They obviously know nothing about my trauma because we haven’t been friends for very long. So I continue talking about my 2003 rerelease tmnt figures and let them continue to touch me while trying not to cry.
Luckily my roommates return, and I immediately get up and leave my room to greet them. At this point I’m incredibly uncomfortable and wanted them out. But I felt bad if I suddenly kicked them out and I also was their ride. We decided to watch a movie in the living room, I sat in the couch corner and they decided to lay down on the rest of the couch while leaning up near me. One of my roommates picked up on the vibe and decided to join us for the movie, the other two sat at the table where you can still see the tv to eat their food since there was no room on the couch.
I decided to crochet during the movie to help ease my nerves. Every once in a while during the movie I could see them staring at me. Once the movie was over I offered to take them home. When I dropped them off they asked if they could hug me, I gave them a nervous sure, when they hugged me they put their nose into the crook of my neck which gave me the ick.
I’m not sure if it’s just me but I hate whenever I want a friend or just want to hang out with a friend and they turn it into something more without asking me! I’ve been notoriously “manic pixie dream girled” my entire life and I’m sick of it. If you want to go out with me just make your intentions known and ask me on a date! I wouldn’t have said yes but I think they knew that and felt the need to trick me instead.
I’m also incredibly turned off by the fact that their boyfriend just had surgery for appendicitis and is also about to have top surgery this week too and instead of caring for him they’re trying to get into my pants.
The whole situation feels icky and I’m so sad cause I thought I found a cool friend. They’re trying to get me to hang out with them again (even though their boyfriend is having top surgery) and I told them I have therapy and college dumpster diving on my days off this week and they’re trying to get me to work around those.
I just want some advice, am I in the wrong for feeling weird around them now or should I see how this plays out. I usually stick to dating women and other nonbinary people so they’re technically in the range of people I can potentially be attracted to but idk. I haven’t been interested in dating a lot lately cause I’ve been working through my trauma in therapy for the past year. My roommates also thought the whole situation was strange and uncomfortable. My roommate also asked if she had ever done anything like that to make me uncomfortable (she’s also amab like my friend), I reassured her she had never done that and that I feel very safe with her.

I'm doing some research/investigation, does anyone know the percentage of young adults who don't go to college and are in committed relationships?
I know that women in college are less likely to be in a committed relationship with someone who doesn't attend college/graduated. Also, college campuses with a higher female to male ratio are prone to more hook-up culture and less dating, which colleges are mostly women. But what about women who don't go to college? Do they date more? Are men who don't go to college more likely to date than hook-up?
The Date’s not Dead after all: New Findings on Hooking Up, Dating and Romantic Relationships in College (utexas.edu)
The College Dating Divide Institute for Family Studies (ifstudies.org)

I’ve always known I like women, but around middle school i got a few “crushes” on guys(in reality i was just thought they looked attractive and cute, i didn’t knew what actually meant to like people). Now it’s kinda rare if i get crushes on guys my last crush on a guy was at the end of last year and even then i got a bunch of icks, i mostly find guys from tv shows/movies/actors ect attractive by the way they look. I don’t know if that’s because guys in my country are ugly or something, i’m also not super fond of the idea of intimacy with a guy. Even now i always picture myself with a woman, not with a guy. Since middle school i’ve identified as Bi, then in highschool i dentified as queer since im not so sure about sexuality and my attraction to men. I wanna identify as a lesbian but im scared if i end up having feelings for a guy. And I also have doubts about if it’s normal for some lesbians to think guys look attractive. Please help.

Im 27 my wife is 25 and we’ve been together for 10 years now. We have 2 kids 5yr & 3M and my wife looks like she’s never been pregnant ( besides the stretch marks ) . She’s 5’0 125lbs and I’m 5’9 200lbs . When we started dating we both looked the same age , as time went on I grew facial hair , my face shape changed as it should change in a span of 10 years , but she still looks the same!
In 2 occasions now women have come to up to me while I’m out with her and the kids and compliment me on my kids , while literally staring at my wife . We laugh about it all the time but I do tell her I’m starting to feel like a creep because of the looks some people give me . Im not leaving my wife lol But wanted to know how any of you would respond to someone coming up to you and saying that .

THIS IS JUST A RANT
I just recently joined a small local law firm as an intern, and I'm miserable. I decided to intern before starting law school, and all the firms I applied to were notified about this matter.However, I'm ready to learn.
The first few days were okay-ish, people were "nice.". However, as the days progress, everyone just seems to have their own circle of "friends.". I do have someone to talk to too, a dude sitting next to me in a different row, and another dude who is sitting across from me.
I admit I made a lot of mistakes in my first few weeks,but I took all the changes as advice. I came in late due to vehicular issues or made some Microsoft word error. I thought it was okay as the others would come in late as well (Pupil of Chambers and the lawyers) and try ducking away from the bosses view (if he is in),then they would laugh about it among each other. However, I was advised otherwise by my superior. Now I come an hour earlier then the others, I would read ,scroll socmed,study or whatever to pass the time till 9 am (Work hour) and if Iam late I would inform my superior. Even during lunch time, I would be back as early as I could so I wouldn't be in trouble, but the others would sometimes be back 30 mins late to the office, laughing away with their bobba tea in hand. I also apply to some Microsoft Word classes to improve my MW usage so I won't make so many useless mistakes and be a burden.
I was put under conveyancing,which I never studies before, ,so to prep myself, I self-studied and hire a tutor to help me understand better.
Next, I realised I don't get to do certain things unlike the others ( Pupil in Chambers (PIC), certain lawyers/paralegals) . At first, I thought it was due to the fact I was still new and just an intern. However, they get away with more things but I get in trouble if I do it . What annoys me is that some joined the firm only a month before me and they are already "buddy-buddy" with the lawyers.
Next dilemma, I was told that everyone was going to a work trip that week, which at the time I thought it was just the bosses and the exec lawyers but turns out it's everyone, including the staff and pupils in chambers. I was stuck wfh aiding a lawyer that chose to stay behind . OFC I had some issues with MW , which I tried the hardest to research , google, youtube and even call some friends for help but alas to no avail and I was upfront about it to the lawyer I was aiding. Obviously I got in trouble the next week by my supervisor when they were back. Hence why I applied for courses after work in MS so I can enhance the skill and be useful to my superiors so I wont get that resented and disappointed look from my superiors. Also, I didn't get to do anything that day, heck I even ask people in the office if they needed any help (desk to desk , email and text but was sadly ignored) .
When they got back from the trip, I realised they were more closer to each other, heck, even with the bosses. I tried making friends but I seem to be getting ignored except by those 2 guys. Hence, I speak to the lawyers in a formal way, even tho the secretary told me it was okay to talk on first-name basis . I wont do so until they tell me it's okay, even towards the firm's secretary.
During lunch time is lonely too. They would go eat together (except for a few who decided to stay behind to eat or chill in the office), and Im never invited, unlike when I was on my first day. Most of the lawyers are ladies (late 20's to early 30's, I think) . From experience, women tend to be meaner to other ladies if you are not up to par with them, could be a racial thing as well but I'm not bringing that in. However, in the past, working with men was a different story, they were somehow more welcoming and pleasant to work with.
This morning, I got told to stop speaking with one of the PIC because she was trying to "concentrate.". Bitch gets to laugh and talk as loud as she wants when others are working but I can't? I use my earphones to muffle the sound if things gets loud. I used to be excited to come to work, but now I feel dread. Im contracted to be with the firm for 4 months, but now I somehow slightly regret joining the firm. I don't want to quit because its barely been 1-2 months, and I don't want to be a pussy by crying about it or quitting (despite wanting to cry in the toilet stalls during lunch break).
Also,I don't always get tasks to do; I feel isolated and everything I do seems to never be good enough. Despite all of this, I somehow still have the urge to learn and be helpful. So I filled my time studying and out of trouble. I try so hard to behave and do my work right so I won't be picked on or chastised by my superiors. Im getting diarrhoea thinking about it. The bright side about this firm, is that they're pretty lenient, unlike other firms.
I know I can be a problem, so I try to mend my mistakes. The advice/feedback help, and I stay in my lane. What I understand, that I'm an intern, ,bottom of the totem- pole, especially given the fact that I'm not in school yet and that I'm slightly older (started later due to COVID). To them, I am a dog, and when they tell me to bark, I bark. Since I will be a dog for the next 4 months, I decided to be a Golden Retriever—helpful, friendly, and always ready to please and learn. I am learningto learn by showing a brave face and cry at home. I have to walk off the pain and all fo this will be just a memory. Luckily, the pay is good and I need this for CV purposes.

Salam to the person reading this, and may Allah bless you in this world and the hereafter.
I tend to have a habit of spiralling into my own thoughts and being stuck there, which is why I am asking for any kind of advice regarding hardships, the reason why we have them, if I will eventually succeed after the hardship and anything relevant.
For context I am a 22 (f). I applied to med school this year and didn’t get in and I know 80% it’s because I have a lower end gpa. I most likely need to do a few more years of undergrad to boost it. I need to retake a class because it’s lowering my average by a lot. I’m in a really competitive program so everyone around me and all of my friends are highly successful individuals. I am a perfectionist and overachiever by nature so any kind of setback makes me immensely upset and depressed. I’ve always wanted to pursue a career in medicine (since middle school as far as I can remember). And one of my primary intentions behind it is to be able to represent muslim women in the West in the best way, and I know that having a career in medicine would help facilitate it because of how highly people regard doctors within society. So growing up I would always notice that there weren’t a lot of muslim women role models. I was born an raised in the west as a muslim, so I want to be able to represent the idea that being a muslim does not prevent a woman from being educated or doing sports or travelling, etc etc (this is a larger part of my goal).
I know that some of my friends will be getting in. Everyone has earned their spot fairly, and I am happy that others get to reap the fruits of their hard work. But this whole situation that I am now officially behind others, or not where I envisioned myself to be makes me incredibly upset. I believe in the qadr of Allah, and everything happens because he has willed it to happen. But my heart hurts, and I often get teary eyed thinking about this, and I sometimes do think why I am going through this tough time. I want to believe that at the end of all of this I will eventually achieve my goal, but there is no guarantee. I don’t have a problem doing more schooling, but the fact that others are ahead of me bothers me. The fact that all the girls my age talk about finding a husband and having to getting married soon (or else they’ll loose their opportunity) and potentially freezing their eggs makes me anxious to my core. On one hand you have people telling girls to not wait long and not be a careerist. On the other hand, I want to do this because I am genuinely passionate about it, and I want to have something to fall back on with the skyrocketing divorce rates. My family is fully supportive of me (no issues in that regard). But I’m an overthinker so all of these thoughts are constantly in my head and it actually tires me so much.
This is the first time I’ve been this transparent on a reddit post, and it’s because I’m going through one of the lowest moments of my life. I love Allah, and I know things happen for a reason whether it be to purify me, perfect my character, prepare me for the future, or to test my imaan. But I just need some advice to help calm my mind. Any ayahs, hadiths, personal anecdotes, or anything would help.