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Student Nurse: tips, advice, and support

2012.12.09 12:39 Baconated_Kayos Student Nurse: tips, advice, and support

Practically anything and everything related to nursing school.
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2012.02.08 20:15 AlbertWily Nursing ATI TEAS test tips, advice, & stories

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2014.01.26 01:59 Superlimin The home of Autoflowers

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2024.05.14 21:00 LordMaxius05 SteamCraft [Modded] [SMP] {Whitelisted} {JAVA} {1.20.1} {18+}

Come one, come all to the Grand SteamCraft Summer Jamboree!

šŸŽ  Greetings, esteemed guests and gallant adventurers! This summer, SteamCraft beckons you to its most magnificent event yet: The Summer Jamboree! Marvel at a festival that inspires and motivates players from all walks of life to gather and commune with one another!
šŸŽ© Engage in Exhilarating Minigames! Participate in an eclectic assortment of minigames, each more captivating than the last. Test your mettle in competitive games from the battle arena to the thrilling escapades of elytra races. Each game is a chance to prove your prowess and claim marvelous prizes!
šŸ… Compete for Glorious Prizes! Earn your place among the legends of SteamCraft by triumphing in our games. Victors will receive prizes most splendidā€”treasures that are not only a testament to your skill but also enviable artifacts of our grand fair.
šŸ¤µ Forge New Alliances! Amidst the revelry, mingle with like-minded souls from every corner of the globe. The Summer Jamboree is a haven for social butterflies and daring adventurers alike. Here, in the bustling crowds and over a spot of tea, lifelong friendships are formed.
šŸŽŖ An Affair to Remember! Mark your calendars, don your finest attire, and prepare for an extravaganza that promises enchantment around every corner. With thrilling activities, stupendous games, and a congregation of enthusiastic participants, this event promises to be the highlight of your summer!
šŸš‚ All Aboard for Fun! The festivities commence on May 16th. Join us on the SteamCraft server and partake in the grandeur. Let us journey together through a summer festooned with fun and camaraderie!

Prepare to be dazzled at the SteamCraft Summer Jamboree! šŸŒŸ

Information regarding the event:

Where? On the SteamCraft Server When? Thursday May 16th at 5pm CST What? We will be playing the following minigames:
Dress code? None is required but there will be a hosted banquet with food provided so formal attire is recommended Prizes? We will be giving away 5 door prizes (randomly selected guests) every hour! For those that stay the entire time, they will have the potential of earning the Fireman Rank for FREE!!!
What can I expect from SteamCraft? You will be asked to fill out a short application whos purpose is to allow us to find out more about you when you join, obtain your IGN, and verify your age (must be 18+ to join)

We look forward to playing with all of you and hope to see you all there!

https://discord.gg/bEtDkj2n?event=1237592583711096842
submitted by LordMaxius05 to feedthebeastservers [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 20:59 LordMaxius05 SteamCraft [Modded] [SMP] {Whitelisted} {JAVA} {1.20.1} {18+}

Come one, come all to the Grand SteamCraft Summer Jamboree!

šŸŽ  Greetings, esteemed guests and gallant adventurers! This summer, SteamCraft beckons you to its most magnificent event yet: The Summer Jamboree! Marvel at a festival that inspires and motivates players from all walks of life to gather and commune with one another!
šŸŽ© Engage in Exhilarating Minigames! Participate in an eclectic assortment of minigames, each more captivating than the last. Test your mettle in competitive games from the battle arena to the thrilling escapades of elytra races. Each game is a chance to prove your prowess and claim marvelous prizes!
šŸ… Compete for Glorious Prizes! Earn your place among the legends of SteamCraft by triumphing in our games. Victors will receive prizes most splendidā€”treasures that are not only a testament to your skill but also enviable artifacts of our grand fair.
šŸ¤µ Forge New Alliances! Amidst the revelry, mingle with like-minded souls from every corner of the globe. The Summer Jamboree is a haven for social butterflies and daring adventurers alike. Here, in the bustling crowds and over a spot of tea, lifelong friendships are formed.
šŸŽŖ An Affair to Remember! Mark your calendars, don your finest attire, and prepare for an extravaganza that promises enchantment around every corner. With thrilling activities, stupendous games, and a congregation of enthusiastic participants, this event promises to be the highlight of your summer!
šŸš‚ All Aboard for Fun! The festivities commence on May 16th. Join us on the SteamCraft server and partake in the grandeur. Let us journey together through a summer festooned with fun and camaraderie!

Prepare to be dazzled at the SteamCraft Summer Jamboree! šŸŒŸ

Information regarding the event:

Where? On the SteamCraft Server When? Thursday May 16th at 5pm CST What? We will be playing the following minigames:
Dress code? None is required but there will be a hosted banquet with food provided so formal attire is recommended Prizes? We will be giving away 5 door prizes (randomly selected guests) every hour! For those that stay the entire time, they will have the potential of earning the Fireman Rank for FREE!!!
What can I expect from SteamCraft? You will be asked to fill out a short application whos purpose is to allow us to find out more about you when you join, obtain your IGN, and verify your age (must be 18+ to join)

We look forward to playing with all of you and hope to see you all there!

https://discord.gg/bEtDkj2n?event=1237592583711096842
submitted by LordMaxius05 to mcservers [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 20:54 LordMaxius05 SteamCraft [Modded] [SMP] {Whitelisted} {JAVA} {1.20.1} {18+}

Come one, come all to the Grand SteamCraft Summer Jamboree!

šŸŽ  Greetings, esteemed guests and gallant adventurers! This summer, SteamCraft beckons you to its most magnificent event yet: The Summer Jamboree! Marvel at a festival that inspires and motivates players from all walks of life to gather and commune with one another!
šŸŽ© Engage in Exhilarating Minigames! Participate in an eclectic assortment of minigames, each more captivating than the last. Test your mettle in competitive games from the battle arena to the thrilling escapades of elytra races. Each game is a chance to prove your prowess and claim marvelous prizes!
šŸ… Compete for Glorious Prizes! Earn your place among the legends of SteamCraft by triumphing in our games. Victors will receive prizes most splendidā€”treasures that are not only a testament to your skill but also enviable artifacts of our grand fair.
šŸ¤µ Forge New Alliances! Amidst the revelry, mingle with like-minded souls from every corner of the globe. The Summer Jamboree is a haven for social butterflies and daring adventurers alike. Here, in the bustling crowds and over a spot of tea, lifelong friendships are formed.
šŸŽŖ An Affair to Remember! Mark your calendars, don your finest attire, and prepare for an extravaganza that promises enchantment around every corner. With thrilling activities, stupendous games, and a congregation of enthusiastic participants, this event promises to be the highlight of your summer!
šŸš‚ All Aboard for Fun! The festivities commence on May 16th. Join us on the SteamCraft server and partake in the grandeur. Let us journey together through a summer festooned with fun and camaraderie!

Prepare to be dazzled at the SteamCraft Summer Jamboree! šŸŒŸ

Information regarding the event:

Where? On the SteamCraft Server When? Thursday May 16th at 5pm CST What? We will be playing the following minigames:
Dress code? None is required but there will be a hosted banquet with food provided so formal attire is recommended Prizes? We will be giving away 5 door prizes (randomly selected guests) every hour! For those that stay the entire time, they will have the potential of earning the Fireman Rank for FREE!!!
What can I expect from SteamCraft? You will be asked to fill out a short application whos purpose is to allow us to find out more about you when you join, obtain your IGN, and verify your age (must be 18+ to join)

We look forward to playing with all of you and hope to see you all there!

https://discord.gg/bEtDkj2n?event=1237592583711096842
submitted by LordMaxius05 to MinecraftServer [link] [comments]


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submitted by ccna_cisco to Statisticshelpers_ [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 20:25 Timely-Worldliness-3 I just needed a little compromise - an unsent letter to my ex

I know it was your first relationship. At 28, you had already been through so much, having been on your own for 13 years. You were forced to grow up too fast, and had to prioritize yourself, building a life from nothing. I get it. It was your fierce independence that made me fall for you in the first place.
I always knew that trying to build a life with you was going to be a struggle. I thought it would be worth it, for both of us. You deserve to have someone in your corner, that always has your back. You shouldnā€™t have to be alone. I donā€™t know if you believed the same.
I think I gave up too much of myself for you. Was that my mistake or yours? Did you really ask for too much, or did I give too freely without expectation for anything in return? Maybe both. Probably more on me. Iā€™m not perfect by a long shot.
Compromise. It really does all come down to that. I tried to show you its importance, but in the process I ended up being the only one willing to do it. Me getting to pick what movie we watched or getting to plan a date became something I only got to do on special occasions. You said you felt like you didnā€™t know me, but so many times in so many ways I offered up little pieces of me to you. I share myself by sharing the things I love with the people I love. But more and more towards the end, all youā€™d say was ā€œnoā€. Ignoring any context. Ignoring those pieces of me.
I know you donā€™t like movies about kids. I know asking to watch Home Alone during Christmas was a big ask. But it was a tradition that I shared with my dad, who I lost just over a year before. I know you think that traditions are pointless, but it was important to me. My earliest memories are of that. I needed to continue on, but I couldnā€™t bring myself to do it alone. I needed you there, your support. It was such a small gesture I was asking of you, but all I got was ā€œnoā€. Instead we watched a movie you picked: Harry Potter and the Sorcererā€™s Stone. A movie made by the exact same people that made Home Alone, and with even more kids.
We wanted to go to Ireland. Personally Iā€™ve been wanting to go for years, but couldnā€™t because of my dadā€™s illness along with everything else going on. You knew that in the last 3 years I lost all of my grandparents, two uncles, my dad. I couldnā€™t risk going so far away for so long while everyone was sick. My mom saw me giving up the latter half of my 20s for my family, when she was hoping I would be enjoying life and seeing the world. Thatā€™s why she was happy to give us the money to have the trip of our dreams. I explained all of this to you while you were struggling to find a way to save for the trip. All my mom wanted in return was a single nice photo of us. That wasnā€™t even a requirement for the money. She just wanted to see me with the person that I love making our dreams come true. I know you hate having your picture taken. The only attention your dad ever gave you was when he wanted to test a new camera. Itā€™s a trauma trigger. But I was only asking for one picture. Youā€™d compromise for your friends, youā€™d compromise for your sister. Youā€™d take pictures with them. Why wouldnā€™t you compromise for your partner, and the other most important person in your partners life? After a year, we have 3 pictures together, none of which are very good. I know that I was asking for a lot, but I felt so less important than everyone else in your life. Maybe you felt that as your partner, I was to be held to a higher standard? I honestly donā€™t know. All you said was ā€œnoā€.
You admitted yourself I was so supportive. I always prioritized you. From always making your tea before mine, to giving you the better looking plate at dinner, to planting all of your favorite flowers in my garden. I always complemented you, how smart you are, how beautiful you are, how driven and independent you are. Your friend needed a ride to a 5k and someone to cheer them on? I was there. You needed someone to drive you around while your car was in the shop for 2 months? No problem. Accidentally overdrew your account again, and you couldnā€™t afford the late fees? Hereā€™s $50. Need to move on short notice? Iā€™m the guy tearing apart and moving your furniture. You have a migraine so bad you canā€™t eat? Iā€™m bringing you pedialyte and sleeping on your couch, even though I didnā€™t actually get any sleep. I learned all your rituals so not to trigger your OCD. There are countless other examples. I never said no. I never complained. You rarely said so much as ā€œthank youā€.
The big one. The thing that ended us. Youā€™re right, we did sit down like adults time and time again and talked things out. You said you needed me to anticipate your needs. Youā€™d get overwhelmed, and couldnā€™t articulate what you needed from me. You couldnā€™t stand being asked what you needed. You just needed me to start helping. ā€œMental loadsā€ and all that. I took that to heart. But Iā€™m not perfect. Sometimes Iā€™d miss the mark. Tried to support you, but in the wrong way. Even in my failures I showed effort, but you never seemed to see that. You only focused on how I failed.
We recognized that this was a problem caused by both of us. The communication wasnā€™t getting through. But I had already adapted to your communication style as much as I could. My exited, rambling, almost impulsive way of generating ideas became slow, methodical, thoughtful. I put intention behind everything so not to overwhelm you. I learned not to jump at the obvious solution.
Yes, we sat down like adults and talked things over time and time again. You told me what you needed from me, but I also told you what I needed from you. If I was missing the mark, please just guide me to what you needed. Iā€™m not a mind reader. I did it for you all the time. You were honestly awful at anticipating my needs too. If I was venting, had a bad day, all youā€™d say was ā€œIā€™m sorryā€, and pat me on the back like a puppy. No effort to dig deeper. No words of support or encouragement. So I had to show you how I needed support. I just needed you to do the same for me. ā€œNoā€. Again.
One final time, I sent you words of support when you were having a bad day. It wasnā€™t enough, you wanted more. A phone call? For me to come over so you could vent in person? Did you actually want me to directly help for once? I donā€™t know. You never told me. Instead of guiding me to what you needed, you immediately shut down. Full silent treatment. Iā€™ve been in abusive relationships where the silent treatment was welded as a weapon. I know you didnā€™t mean it in an abusive way, you were just overwhelmed again. But I never expected it from you. I didnā€™t see it for what it was. I only ever asked one thing from you to save us. I put in the work, got us 80% of the way there. I knew I couldnā€™t bridge the gap on my own. I wasnā€™t even asking you to put in effort on my behalf, it was for your benefit. I begged you time and time again for help. To communicate. Not to put it all on me, because I couldnā€™t do it on my own. But instead, you did the opposite.
You said that you felt like you were putting more effort into the relationship than I was. Iā€™m sorry, but I canā€™t see that effort. Iā€™m trying to give you the benefit of the doubt, but I canā€™t. Maybe you mean you put effort into forgiving me every time I messed up? Maybe you mean that you were always planning dates, always picking what we watched, where we went, what we ate, what we drank? Again, mental loads and such. But I had things that I wanted to do and share with you that you always turned down. You only had to plan everything after my plans were rejected. It would have been more efficient for you to show love, patience, and compromise. Maybe we would have worked out then.
But you left instead.
submitted by Timely-Worldliness-3 to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 20:18 Sad_Bat7625 Feeling guilt for messaging my abusive ex

About a year ago, I [29 M] was in a toxic relationship with J [29 M]. While there were no serious stakes in it (no kids or messy finances), the relationship and breakup ended up emotionally affecting me in a way I had never really thought possible. I feel guilty because after the relationship I tried to be friends with my ex still, which I now see as a mistake in the context of this relationship, and then after a few months, he blocked me because I didn't respect a boundary he had set about not sending him long messages. He said he didn't feel safe since I "completely ignored" the boundary.
I was devastated, but over the course of the next few months, came to understand a great deal of ways that I feel that I had been abused during the relationship. I felt angrier and angrier, and even though I was seeing a therapist, it eventually boiled over. My ex had blocked me on discord and probably on text, but I went onto an astrology app called Co-Star that he had had me download, and sent a message using it that said something like, "You were an abusive partner, but you can make it right with an apology."
Now, I have no idea if he actually saw the message. It was sent with a weird feature of the app called Chaos Mode that apparently chooses to send the message at some future time, so who knows if it actually ever sent. I don't know if he still has the app, if he unfriended me, or whatnot. But I feel guilty because I enacted exactly the caricature of me that he had created--I hadn't respected his boundaries, and I sent the message anyways.
At the same time, I am still feeling very victimized by the relationship. To give you a sense of the kinds of things that were going on in the relationship, here's a few examples that I currently find a little horrific [Note: this kind of turned into a summary of the relationship after I wrote it]. I'm aware that to heal I should probably not be ruminating about these things, especially if they lead me to boil over and message him, but here you go.
The first time I had sex with him, he slammed the door on me for not being able to finish and said "finish yourself." When I came to bed, I told him I felt shame. He said "good." The next time we had sex, he set a timer for me and said I had to finish within 5 minutes. These were the first times I ever had sex. He was manipulative in bed, telling me he didn't want to perform certain acts because I didn't give him enough praise for them, so that I started exaggerating my pleasure; he blamed me for why certain positions weren't working and was frustrated with how my body worked. On top of this, he admitted at the end of the relationship to having had sex with me around five times after he decided to break up with me (before he did), which just makes me feel a bit icky.
He would put me down in pretty transparently cruel ways. One example was when I exerted myself, he said I sounded like a muppet and that he "didn't want to be dating a muppet." When I offered him a blanket but apologized that it might not have been washed in a while, he called me a baby. He would insult my ability to give complements, asking me to tell him what color his eyes are but then rejecting everything that I gave him, telling me I was bad at complements repeatedly (and saying that it wasn't fair of him because his other exes were artists, so no wonder I was bad). Now, there were times that he was complementary to me--he told me I was hot, good at singing, good at writing, smart--but also times where he would put me down for things I was less good at, like cooking.
He constantly made me feel insecure about my gender. (For context, we are both men, but he was raised as a woman). So he would make pretty sweeping feminist critiques over fairly mundane things, like if I complained when I was sick he would go off about how men are always babies when they are sick and women don't get attention. When I confronted him about some of the things he was saying, telling him that while I wanted him to express these kinds of social problems so that I could be aware and adapt, I was feeling insecure in the relationship--he flipped it around and told me that if I didn't feel loved, he could say "I love you" less, and that I hadn't been grateful enough for when he came to visit me. (I had written him poetry, deep cleaned my apartment, taken time off work, sent my roommate off for the week, bought him a bus pass, planned his visit, met him in the airport despite not having a car, and just an insane amount of work to be turned into, "you weren't grateful enough").
Other than namecalling, he was just plain controlling. The reason that the boundary around me not sending long messages exists is that when I felt insecure--which I think makes sense given the ways he would talk to me--I would often send him a few paragraphs apologizing and explaining how I was growing. Even though long messages were the first thing he said he loved about me, and that he said our communication was like magic, he eventually set up what he called an "Essay embargo" and told me not to write them. The first time he set the "embargo", he had said it was only until we met in person because he didn't want me to write anything that would make him nervous. After we met in person, I assumed the embargo had lifted. Yet shortly after, he set it again, giving a few explanations--the main one just being that he wanted to appreciate our relationship without overthinking it. It seemed playful. He definitely did also say that long messages made him uncomfortable because he felt obligated to send a response. So, when I did send messages, I would add that he didn't have to respond (which I realize is not fully respecting the boundary). I did ask after sending messages whether they were ok and he never responded to those questions.
Despite this, there were times during the relationship that I continued to send long, often apologetic messages. I had felt like this boundary was set playfully and I also was feeling overwhelming guilt that I, for whatever reason, needed his affirmation for. I am conflicted because on the one hand, I was definitely ignoring his boundary--but on the other, I feel like the boundary was not very thoughtful of my own needs, either.
Prior to the breakup, it was hell. He was getting angry at me for everything--for pretty mundane things like using the bathroom before him and stinking it up. He told me he had to show me how to do everything, but I realize now that a lot of this was just him being particular (e.g, he told me I don't know how to drink tea because I left the bag in, when I just like it strong). Unfortunately, I had flown 5,000 miles to visit him and was sort of trapped in his proximity, and was drunk on love still since I was trying very hard, it was my first relationship, and he had sold me on notions of fairytale romance and told me we were cosmically meant to be together and other lovebomby sort of things. At one point, he missed a turn while driving with GPS and got angry at me for not helping--he disconnected his phone and threw it sideways at me (I guess so I could navigate for him, but it was a pretty retaliatory motion). We flew to a convention and I met some of his friends, and at one point he introduced me to a girl he had almost dated before, saying I was a friend and not a partner. I pointed this out to him later and he just said "does that make you angry?". He flirted with a woman at a party, telling her she was pretty while demanding that i bring him snacks (I feel so, so weak for not confronting him about this). He got drunk and I stayed with him as he passed out, but he was angry at me in the morning. When one of his friends told me they thought I was nice, because i was opening doors for everyone, my ex said "Is he really?" Questioning them.
The breakup itself was cold and calculated. He started it by telling me that he thought about not giving me any reasons for the breakup because I always overanalyze things. He told me he wouldn't have broken up with me if I was a woman. He told me I didn't take care of him and he needs a partner that takes care of him, and that his partners always feel taken care of. He threw some things I had said at the beginning of the relationship back at me--misquoting and misunderstanding them.
After the relationship, I had no idea what to think. It was my first relationship. It had started with fairytale romance. I had been passing his tests, I had been an exception to his long string of abusive relationships. He presented himself as this incredibly moral person (vegan, environmentally conscious, telling me of all of the ways others had abused him that he would never do, even his closest friends). I had completely internalized criticisms that he had had of me throughout the relationship, many of which had led to serious self reflection and my writing messages about my growth. Within a week I told him I still loved him and that I always would. He reminded me of his boundary around long messages and said they made him anxious. I was desperate. We took a few weeks of no-contact. We messaged short-messages back and forth, with a few life-updates to eachother each. He told me he was rescuing a kitten that he found, and I remembered how he could be kind.
But as I processed, more and more, I felt angry. I wrote unsent angry letters in the notes app on my phone for a month. I wrote myself a 20,000 word summary of the relationship. This was not a healthy way to process. It elevated me. (Some of you will probably comment that maybe I shouldn't have written this post for the same reason, but oh well--I wanted to process and I want to hear if others have similar stories). Meanwhile, my ex kept pushing back the date for when we would verbally connect again. Eventually, I boiled over. I did not insult him. But I wrote a long message explaining that I wanted to take 3 months of no-contact. I had entered another relationship and told him that even though I was feeling angry at him, he shouldn't be worried because even though I had baggage from the relationship, I was communicating well with my new partner. I also told him that I felt like if I did talk with him, that I would end up tearing him a new one, and that I needed time to cool down. I'm not proud of the message in general, but I didn't call names, tell him he was awful, or anything like that. I was just insensitive and told him I was angry.
And like that, I was blocked. It was over. A period of about 9 months, five of which we were together, with two before escalating towards love bombing and two after escalating towards my boiling over.
And yet, I had never expressed to him that I thought he had been abusive. I felt frustrated that I had told him that I would always love him, when in many ways now I hated him.
Five months passed, during which I came to realize more and more how messed up the relationship was.
And then I sent the message on Co-star.
Fast forward another four months to now.
I just sent him a text, knowing he probably has blocked me there too. It said something like, "I want my last message to you just be: I'm sorry, and I forgive you." I wanted to free myself. I needed to not feel angry at him or ashamed of myself. I needed to not feel like I had a million things to say to him--I needed to just say, this is it: I'm not sending more messages. I'm sorry, and I forgive you. It was for myself. I was forgiving him selfishly, even though he didn't deserve it, so that I could move on.
I feel like I shouldn't have sent this, but I don't feel bad about it yet, either. I needed closure. It always felt like there was some "message I could send" to detail his abuse, and I needed to not have that standing over me--I needed to forgive. I am now oscillating between wondering about myself--whether I have a problem with boundaries, since I had boiled over at this point three times to message him. Feeling frustrated I didn't assert myself about his abuse, that I doubled down on loving him. Part of me is glad that I sent the message on Co-Star saying that he was abusive, because it was the only indication I ever gave him, really, that what he did wasn't ok to me--he had blocked me before I could articulate anything. But I also know that this message even if received would not mean anything to him.
Anyways, now I'm venting about it here on Reddit. Does anyone have similar experiences surrounding self control messaging exes and feeling a bit out of control?
submitted by Sad_Bat7625 to abusiverelationships [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 19:54 Timely-Worldliness-3 I just needed a little compromise - an unsent letter to my ex

I know it was your first relationship. At 28, you had already been through so much, having been on your own for 13 years. You were forced to grow up too fast, and had to prioritize yourself, building a life from nothing. I get it. It was your fierce independence that made me fall for you in the first place.
I always knew that trying to build a life with you was going to be a struggle. I thought it would be worth it, for both of us. You deserve to have someone in your corner, that always has your back. You shouldnā€™t have to be alone. I donā€™t know if you believed the same.
I think I gave up too much of myself for you. Was that my mistake or yours? Did you really ask for too much, or did I give too freely without expectation for anything in return? Maybe both. Probably more on me. Iā€™m not perfect by a long shot.
Compromise. It really does all come down to that. I tried to show you its importance, but in the process I ended up being the only one willing to do it. Me getting to pick what movie we watched or getting to plan a date became something I only got to do on special occasions. You said you felt like you didnā€™t know me, but so many times in so many ways I offered up little pieces of me to you. I share myself by sharing the things I love with the people I love. But more and more towards the end, all youā€™d say was ā€œnoā€. Ignoring any context. Ignoring those pieces of me.
I know you donā€™t like movies about kids. I know asking to watch Home Alone during Christmas was a big ask. But it was a tradition that I shared with my dad, who I lost just over a year before. I know you think that traditions are pointless, but it was important to me. My earliest memories are of that. I needed to continue on, but I couldnā€™t bring myself to do it alone. I needed you there, your support. It was such a small gesture I was asking of you, but all I got was ā€œnoā€. Instead we watched a movie you picked: Harry Potter and the Sorcererā€™s Stone. A movie made by the exact same people that made Home Alone, and with even more kids.
We wanted to go to Ireland. Personally Iā€™ve been wanting to go for years, but couldnā€™t because of my dadā€™s illness along with everything else going on. You knew that in the last 3 years I lost all of my grandparents, two uncles, my dad. I couldnā€™t risk going so far away for so long while everyone was sick. My mom saw me giving up the latter half of my 20s for my family, when she was hoping I would be enjoying life and seeing the world. Thatā€™s why she was happy to give us the money to have the trip of our dreams. I explained all of this to you while you were struggling to find a way to save for the trip. All my mom wanted in return was a single nice photo of us. That wasnā€™t even a requirement for the money. She just wanted to see me with the person that I love making our dreams come true. I know you hate having your picture taken. The only attention your dad ever gave you was when he wanted to test a new camera. Itā€™s a trauma trigger. But I was only asking for one picture. Youā€™d compromise for your friends, youā€™d compromise for your sister. Youā€™d take pictures with them. Why wouldnā€™t you compromise for your partner, and the other most important person in your partners life? After a year, we have 3 pictures together, none of which are very good. I know that I was asking for a lot, but I felt so less important than everyone else in your life. Maybe you felt that as your partner, I was to be held to a higher standard? I honestly donā€™t know. All you said was ā€œnoā€.
You admitted yourself I was so supportive. I always prioritized you. From always making your tea before mine, to giving you the better looking plate at dinner, to planting all of your favorite flowers in my garden. I always complemented you, how smart you are, how beautiful you are, how driven and independent you are. Your friend needed a ride to a 5k and someone to cheer them on? I was there. You needed someone to drive you around while your car was in the shop for 2 months? No problem. Accidentally overdrew your account again, and you couldnā€™t afford the late fees? Hereā€™s $50. Need to move on short notice? Iā€™m the guy tearing apart and moving your furniture. You have a migraine so bad you canā€™t eat? Iā€™m bringing you pedialyte and sleeping on your couch, even though I didnā€™t actually get any sleep. I learned all your rituals so not to trigger your OCD. There are countless other examples. I never said no. I never complained. You rarely said so much as ā€œthank youā€.
The big one. The thing that ended us. Youā€™re right, we did sit down like adults time and time again and talked things out. You said you needed me to anticipate your needs. Youā€™d get overwhelmed, and couldnā€™t articulate what you needed from me. You couldnā€™t stand being asked what you needed. You just needed me to start helping. ā€œMental loadsā€ and all that. I took that to heart. But Iā€™m not perfect. Sometimes Iā€™d miss the mark. Tried to support you, but in the wrong way. Even in my failures I showed effort, but you never seemed to see that. You only focused on how I failed.
We recognized that this was a problem caused by both of us. The communication wasnā€™t getting through. But I had already adapted to your communication style as much as I could. My exited, rambling, almost impulsive way of generating ideas became slow, methodical, thoughtful. I put intention behind everything so not to overwhelm you. I learned not to jump at the obvious solution.
Yes, we sat down like adults and talked things over time and time again. You told me what you needed from me, but I also told you what I needed from you. If I was missing the mark, please just guide me to what you needed. Iā€™m not a mind reader. I did it for you all the time. You were honestly awful at anticipating my needs too. If I was venting, had a bad day, all youā€™d say was ā€œIā€™m sorryā€, and pat me on the back like a puppy. No effort to dig deeper. No words of support or encouragement. So I had to show you how I needed support. I just needed you to do the same for me. ā€œNoā€. Again.
One final time, I sent you words of support when you were having a bad day. It wasnā€™t enough, you wanted more. A phone call? For me to come over so you could vent in person? Did you actually want me to directly help for once? I donā€™t know. You never told me. Instead of guiding me to what you needed, you immediately shut down. Full silent treatment. Iā€™ve been in abusive relationships where the silent treatment was welded as a weapon. I know you didnā€™t mean it in an abusive way, you were just overwhelmed again. But I never expected it from you. I didnā€™t see it for what it was. I only ever asked one thing from you to save us. I put in the work, got us 80% of the way there. I knew I couldnā€™t bridge the gap on my own. I wasnā€™t even asking you to put in effort on my behalf, it was for your benefit. I begged you time and time again for help. To communicate. Not to put it all on me, because I couldnā€™t do it on my own. But instead, you did the opposite.
You said that you felt like you were putting more effort into the relationship than I was. Iā€™m sorry, but I canā€™t see that effort. Iā€™m trying to give you the benefit of the doubt, but I canā€™t. Maybe you mean you put effort into forgiving me every time I messed up? Maybe you mean that you were always planning dates, always picking what we watched, where we went, what we ate, what we drank? Again, mental loads and such. But I had things that I wanted to do and share with you that you always turned down. You only had to plan everything after my plans were rejected. It would have been more efficient for you to show love, patience, and compromise. Maybe we would have worked out then.
But then you left.
submitted by Timely-Worldliness-3 to heartbreak [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 19:50 Timely-Worldliness-3 I just needed a little compromise - an unsent letter to my ex

I know it was your first relationship. At 28, you had already been through so much, having been on your own for 13 years. You were forced to grow up too fast, and had to prioritize yourself, building a life from nothing. I get it. It was your fierce independence that made me fall for you in the first place.
I always knew that trying to build a life with you was going to be a struggle. I thought it would be worth it, for both of us. You deserve to have someone in your corner, that always has your back. You shouldnā€™t have to be alone. I donā€™t know if you believed the same.
I think I gave up too much of myself for you. Was that my mistake or yours? Did you really ask for too much, or did I give too freely without expectation for anything in return? Maybe both. Probably more on me. Iā€™m not perfect by a long shot.
Compromise. It really does all come down to that. I tried to show you its importance, but in the process I ended up being the only one willing to do it. Me getting to pick what movie we watched or getting to plan a date became something I only got to do on special occasions. You said you felt like you didnā€™t know me, but so many times in so many ways I offered up little pieces of me to you. I share myself by sharing the things I love with the people I love. But more and more towards the end, all youā€™d say was ā€œnoā€. Ignoring any context. Ignoring those pieces of me.
I know you donā€™t like movies about kids. I know asking to watch Home Alone during Christmas was a big ask. But it was a tradition that I shared with my dad, who I lost just over a year before. I know you think that traditions are pointless, but it was important to me. My earliest memories are of that. I needed to continue on, but I couldnā€™t bring myself to do it alone. I needed you there, your support. It was such a small gesture I was asking of you, but all I got was ā€œnoā€. Instead we watched a movie you picked: Harry Potter and the Sorcererā€™s Stone. A movie made by the exact same people that made Home Alone, and with even more kids.
We wanted to go to Ireland. Personally Iā€™ve been wanting to go for years, but couldnā€™t because of my dadā€™s illness along with everything else going on. You knew that in the last 3 years I lost all of my grandparents, two uncles, my dad. I couldnā€™t risk going so far away for so long while everyone was sick. My mom saw me giving up the latter half of my 20s for my family, when she was hoping I would be enjoying life and seeing the world. Thatā€™s why she was happy to give us the money to have the trip of our dreams. I explained all of this to you while you were struggling to find a way to save for the trip. All my mom wanted in return was a single nice photo of us. That wasnā€™t even a requirement for the money. She just wanted to see me with the person that I love making our dreams come true. I know you hate having your picture taken. The only attention your dad ever gave you was when he wanted to test a new camera. Itā€™s a trauma trigger. But I was only asking for one picture. Youā€™d compromise for your friends, youā€™d compromise for your sister. Youā€™d take pictures with them. Why wouldnā€™t you compromise for your partner, and the other most important person in your partners life? After a year, we have 3 pictures together, none of which are very good. I know that I was asking for a lot, but I felt so less important than everyone else in your life. Maybe you felt that as your partner, I was to be held to a higher standard? I honestly donā€™t know. All you said was ā€œnoā€.
You admitted yourself I was so supportive. I always prioritized you. From always making your tea before mine, to giving you the better looking plate at dinner, to planting all of your favorite flowers in my garden. I always complemented you, how smart you are, how beautiful you are, how driven and independent you are. Your friend needed a ride to a 5k and someone to cheer them on? I was there. You needed someone to drive you around while your car was in the shop for 2 months? No problem. Accidentally overdrew your account again, and you couldnā€™t afford the late fees? Hereā€™s $50. Need to move on short notice? Iā€™m the guy tearing apart and moving your furniture. You have a migraine so bad you canā€™t eat? Iā€™m bringing you pedialyte and sleeping on your couch, even though I didnā€™t actually get any sleep. I learned all your rituals so not to trigger your OCD. There are countless other examples. I never said no. I never complained. You rarely said so much as ā€œthank youā€.
The big one. The thing that ended us. Youā€™re right, we did sit down like adults time and time again and talked things out. You said you needed me to anticipate your needs. Youā€™d get overwhelmed, and couldnā€™t articulate what you needed from me. You couldnā€™t stand being asked what you needed. You just needed me to start helping. ā€œMental loadsā€ and all that. I took that to heart. But Iā€™m not perfect. Sometimes Iā€™d miss the mark. Tried to support you, but in the wrong way. Even in my failures I showed effort, but you never seemed to see that. You only focused on how I failed.
We recognized that this was a problem caused by both of us. The communication wasnā€™t getting through. But I had already adapted to your communication style as much as I could. My exited, rambling, almost impulsive way of generating ideas became slow, methodical, thoughtful. I put intention behind everything so not to overwhelm you. I learned not to jump at the obvious solution.
Yes, we sat down like adults and talked things over time and time again. You told me what you needed from me, but I also told you what I needed from you. If I was missing the mark, please just guide me to what you needed. Iā€™m not a mind reader. I did it for you all the time. You were honestly awful at anticipating my needs too. If I was venting, had a bad day, all youā€™d say was ā€œIā€™m sorryā€, and pat me on the back like a puppy. No effort to dig deeper. No words of support or encouragement. So I had to show you how I needed support. I just needed you to do the same for me. ā€œNoā€. Again.
One final time, I sent you words of support when you were having a bad day. It wasnā€™t enough, you wanted more. A phone call? For me to come over so you could vent in person? Did you actually want me to directly help for once? I donā€™t know. You never told me. Instead of guiding me to what you needed, you immediately shut down. Full silent treatment. Iā€™ve been in abusive relationships where the silent treatment was welded as a weapon. I know you didnā€™t mean it in an abusive way, you were just overwhelmed again. But I never expected it from you. I didnā€™t see it for what it was. I only ever asked one thing from you to save us. I put in the work, got us 80% of the way there. I knew I couldnā€™t bridge the gap on my own. I wasnā€™t even asking you to put in effort on my behalf, it was for your benefit. I begged you time and time again for help. To communicate. Not to put it all on me, because I couldnā€™t do it on my own. But instead, you did the opposite.
You said that you felt like you were putting more effort into the relationship than I was. Iā€™m sorry, but I canā€™t see that effort. Iā€™m trying to give you the benefit of the doubt, but I canā€™t. Maybe you mean you put effort into forgiving me every time I messed up? Maybe you mean that you were always planning dates, always picking what we watched, where we went, what we ate, what we drank? Again, mental loads and such. But I had things that I wanted to do and share with you that you always turned down. You only had to plan everything after my plans were rejected. It would have been more efficient for you to show love, patience, and compromise. Maybe we would have worked out then.
But then you left.



submitted by Timely-Worldliness-3 to BreakUps [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 19:44 Nervous_Ad_9705 [Acne] I think mint tea is helping my acne

So I'm a 19-year-old male who has been struggling with severe acne for a couple years now. I tried everythingā€”diets, topicals, workouts, etc. I didn't go on Accutane because I personally am not comfortable taking a harsh drug, but I don't care if anyone else wants to take it. I was reading somewhere where people were saying that spearmint tea improved their acne. So I gave it a shot. I went to the store, and the one I bought had both spearmint and peppermint, which tasted good. I've been drinking it for a couple months. I noticed it in month 1. My acne has reduced by 80% in just one month. I know I said my acne was severe in the beginning, but my current acne before the tea was moderate, and now it's mild. I read that testosterone causes acne, so maybe this is lowering it?? idk. I did notice a little muscle loss, which is weird, but I've not been going to the gym, so I don't think it's the tea. I did a test where I stopped drinking this tea for two weeks, and boom, my acne exploded. I hopped back on it, and my acne is back to being mild. still dealing with a little scarring and some red marks. I haven't changed anything in my routine or my diet. I'm also always hydrated. I told my dad, and he told me my acne is probably going away since I'm getting older, but idk.
submitted by Nervous_Ad_9705 to SkincareAddiction [link] [comments]


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2024.05.14 18:49 Debt-Mysterious Bridgertonā€™s Nicola Coughlan & Luke Newton Take On The Ultimate Afternoon Tea Taste Test

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2024.05.14 18:03 Royal_Darjeeling Nic and Newts Take On The Ultimate Afternoon Tea Taste Test for British Vogue

Nic and Newts Take On The Ultimate Afternoon Tea Taste Test for British Vogue submitted by Royal_Darjeeling to PolinBridgerton [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 17:32 bigslongbuysxrp Breaking a DF with urine?

Hi All,
I have recently come across and been reading on the effects of urine therapy and have dabbled in that area for a few weeks (both consumption and tropically) and has done WONDERS for my hands where I used to have eczema! I still have issues with peeling and loosing finger tips but working on that!
I have got back into a dry fasting also after a few years of not doing it and so far 48hrs are down and hasn't been to strenuous shooting for 3-5 days.
Question I have is - has anyone broke a fast on there own collected urine during a DF? Would this amplify things in a good way or just send me into a full on herx and down spiral when breaking things?
Currently collecting on 2nd day urine and wondering whether to test this out or not.
Mature answers only please. I fully understand this unorthodox therapy may not be everyone's cup of tea.
submitted by bigslongbuysxrp to Dryfasting [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 17:24 maxdiary The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf Coupon Code for May 2024

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submitted by maxdiary to DiscountRaving [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 17:21 Accomplished-Way1258 Seeking dilution & scent advice

Hii, I'm just getting into mixing my own perfume oils and my first mix had an uncomfortable reaction on my skin. I've seen mixed feedback on the potency I should be aiming for, so I suspect it may have been too concentrated (maybe by a lot!). I used about 29 drops of essential oil in a 5 ml roller bottle.
I'll do a patch test of all the oils I used (To do this, should I just do a 1/1 ratio of carrier oil to essential oil?)
I would also welcome advice on balancing this scent. I am inspired by Tom Ford's Tobacco Vanille perfume but would like to create something a bit more interesting and androgynous, a bit less sweet. You know those intoxicating scents of chai tea, ginger, tobacco, that you just can't get enough of? That's what I'm going for! This is my first time mixing my own scent and I'm already in love with the process.
The oils i used:
I would also like to add clove and ginger next time.
Thank you so much for any help and guidance!!
submitted by Accomplished-Way1258 to DIYfragrance [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 17:13 Accomplished-Way1258 Homemade perfume oil beginner - question with dilution

Hii, I'm just getting into mixing my own perfume oils and my first mix had an uncomfortable reaction on my skin. I've seen mixed feedback on the potency I should be aiming for, so I suspect it may have been too concentrated (maybe by a lot!). I used about 29 drops of essential oil in a 5 ml roller bottle.
I'll do a patch test of all the oils I used (To do this, should I just do a 1/1 ratio of carrier oil to essential oil?)
I would also welcome advice on balancing this scent. I am inspired by Tom Ford's Tobacco Vanille perfume but would like to create something a bit more interesting and androgynous, a bit less sweet. You know those intoxicating scents of chai tea, ginger, tobacco, that you just can't get enough of? That's what I'm going for! This is my first time mixing my own scent and I'm already in love with the process.
The oils i used:
I would also like to add clove and ginger next time.
Thank you so much for any help and guidance!!
submitted by Accomplished-Way1258 to PerfumeOils [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 17:13 maxdiary Tea Collection Coupon Code for May 2024

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submitted by maxdiary to DiscountRaving [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 17:12 Tbone389z Looking for answers/reassurance

A little background: Iā€™m 34 and been TTC for almost a year. Prior to this I had an IUD for about 8 years and had no periods. After the IUD was removed, my periods have been very regular, but very light and only last 1-2 days.
My TTC timeline:
I got pregnant my first regular cycle after my IUD removal and it ended up being chemical. Had another chemical two months later. Saw a fertility specialist and had ALL the tests and everything looks perfect.. with the exception of my uterine lining. On day 8 of my cycle it was 2mm which they said was thin but also it maybe should be thin at that point? It was never rechecked after that because they said it doesnā€™t matter (but they check it for IUI and IVF so riddle me that).
Since then I have not been able to get pregnant. I did one cycle with oral estrogen, clomid, and progesterone with no luck. I had another doctor tell me that progesterone actually prevents implantation which is why I didnā€™t get pregnant. I was also concerned the clomid would thin my uterine lining more but the doc said the estrogen would make up for that. Have not been able to get an RX for estrogen outside of this.
Iā€™m now on my second cycle unmedicated after clomid. Iā€™ve tried everything they say to do: eat healthy, exercise, pomegranate juice, fertility tea, vitex, acupuncture, castor oil, heating pad. Heck Iā€™ve even used astrology charts to time sex! At this point I feel like doctors wonā€™t help because everything is ā€œnormalā€ so it just wonā€™t happen for me. I worry if I am pregnant this cycle I will just lose it anyway.
submitted by Tbone389z to TryingForABaby [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 16:45 Sufficient-Abroad656 Chronic Constipation

So, I am a 24f that has been dealing with constant constipation for ~5 years. I have hypothyriodism, and am active person who consumes a healthy diet, drinks ~80oz water daily. I have gotten a colonoscopy that essentially came back normal. I have tried what feels like everything to relieve my constipation (benefiber, Metamucil, squatty potty, miralax, olive oil, coffee, kiwi fruit, herbal teas, bowel training, abdomen massage, prune juice, laxatives). I have been to about 5 different GI doctors which have mostly told me to eat a high fiber diet and take miralax daily - I feel like I am not taken seriously as I am technically a young healthy person. I currently have to take 4 capfuls of miralax at baseline just to have a bowel movement. I feel full of stool, bloated, gassy at pretty much all times and need to use a suppository or enema about every 2 weeks.
I am writing on here because I am feeling hopeless. I have an appointment with a new GI doctor coming up and am going to ask about psyllium husk, motility testing, and pelvic floor therapy. Are there any other therapies out there that I should ask about or know about that I havenā€™t tried? šŸ˜­ I just want to feel like a normal human again
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