Borgia flags in trajan

If total sync is %100, does that mean I completed game %100?

2024.05.14 20:25 AdministrativeList30 If total sync is %100, does that mean I completed game %100?

Hi, I completed all the side quests in AC Brotherhood and campaign.
I didn’t collect all of the Borgia flags and I didn’t complete all guild challanges.
Do I need to complete those? Is there an achievement for fully completing game?
submitted by AdministrativeList30 to assassinscreed [link] [comments]

2024.05.11 02:01 Blasersays What’s more important, story or characters?

I am replaying the Ezio saga and I was wondering what could be more important for the fans nowadays for an AC to be called good. Ezio was a very charismatic character and its story is one of the most (if not the most) appreciated from every fan. Many others liked Edward so much they would love to see that rumored Black Flag remake.
In both cases I’ve heard many people saying their story wasn’t exceptionally good, but still it had a decent progression that kept things moving forward nicely. My opinion is that probably what made those games so appreciated was how many interesting characters were involved (Ezio, Machiavelli, Leonardo Da Vinci, the Borgia family / Edward, Blackbeard, Hornigold, Bennet, Anne Bonny, Mary Read, Adewale) into a nice driven story, even if sometimes simple.
It isn’t a question of how many games a character had: Black Flag was a lonely chapter but this didn’t make a difference with Kenway; if you just didn’t appreciate so much an AC, is probably because the main char wasn’t that much charismatic to challenge names like Ezio Auditore, Altair, Edward Kenway.
Other games may be having more interesting stories but their main is nothing exceptional or not remarkable at all. So what I really hope for the next games is just to see nice interesting characters progressing into their stories: if they’re interesting, we’ll probably appreciate more everything around them.
However, it’s just my opinion of course, so feel free to share yours! What do you think about it?
submitted by Blasersays to assassinscreed [link] [comments]

2024.04.13 00:52 RiseRevolutionary153 AC Brotherhood: Borgia flags in Romulus Lairs

Hey, so I know I missed some flags. I wanna 100% the game on the Ezio Collection. I know there are 3 flags in each lair - am I able to quit the memory once I got them all or do I have to complete the memory again to ensure I got them all?
Thanks 🙂
submitted by RiseRevolutionary153 to assassinscreed [link] [comments]

2024.04.05 10:13 1-post-stuff What am I missing with brotherhood?

So I’m replaying all the games atm and I’ve finally gotten to brotherhood, one of the only two I hadn’t played before now (the other being Valhalla) and it feels as though I’m missing something.
This is the one everyone told me was the best and I gotta say so far it may just be my least favourite and I want to get the appeal! I’m on sequence 7 and so far the story is really feeling lackluster, the opening was strong but Cesare really doesn’t feel like that strong a villain and the rest of the missions almost feel like side adventures (like helping Bartolomeo help get his wife back). The writing is fine so far but nothing different from 2 or revelations, if anything a bit worse. Ezio is also at his most dull, no real conflict with himself like the other two and doesn’t have too many strong scenes so far.
I’m really hoping the final act saves this game but if it’s about the same then what am I just not appreciating?
Edit: Okay so I finished the game and I have a few thoughts to take away.
  1. The best part of the game is the set pieces, right after I made my first post I invaded the colosseum and performed in the death of Jesus and it was remarkable! The final fight with Borgia, although lackluster in many ways, looked gorgeous.
  2. The combat is fine, gameplay-wise there were certainly cool mechanics like the initiates but other than that it felt like ac3 or black flag gameplay with just a bit less polish.
  3. The story. As someone who jumped from AC2 straight to revelations, I would still recommend newcomers just skip brotherhood anyway. The story dilutes Ezio’s arc and feels like a mid DLC. Templar’s aren’t even mentioned and Borgia is arguable the franchise’s weakest protagonist. I never once felt any emotion besides the ending with Lucy and the very beginning.
All round, given the hype in very disappointed. If I came in more objectively, I’d say it’s fine. I’d rank it at the lowest of the Ezio trilogy and probably would rank closely to unity and AC1.
submitted by 1-post-stuff to assassinscreed [link] [comments]

2024.03.30 13:38 Existing_Yam_4750 I am trying to open minecraft forge 1.18.2 and I get the following error:

The game crashed whilst rendering overlay Error: net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigFileTypeHandler$ConfigLoadingException: Failed loading config file flywheel-client.toml of type CLIENT for modid flywheel (Code: -1)
​
Here is the complete code:
---- Minecraft Crash Report ---- // Daisy, daisy...
Time: 30/3/24 13:12 Description: Rendering overlay
net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigFileTypeHandler$ConfigLoadingException: Failed loading config file flywheel-client.toml of type CLIENT for modid flywheel at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigFileTypeHandler.lambda$reader$1(ConfigFileTypeHandler.java:47) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigTracker.openConfig(ConfigTracker.java:60) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigTracker.lambda$loadConfigs$1(ConfigTracker.java:50) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at java.lang.Iterable.forEach(Iterable.java:75) ~[?:?] {re:mixin} at java.util.Collections$SynchronizedCollection.forEach(Collections.java:2131) ~[?:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigTracker.loadConfigs(ConfigTracker.java:50) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.core.ModStateProvider.lambda$new$1(ModStateProvider.java:33) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading} at net.minecraftforge.fml.DistExecutor.unsafeRunWhenOn(DistExecutor.java:111) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.core.ModStateProvider.lambda$new$3(ModStateProvider.java:33) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading} at net.minecraftforge.fml.ModLoader.lambda$dispatchAndHandleError$20(ModLoader.java:186) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at java.util.Optional.ifPresent(Optional.java:178) ~[?:?] {re:mixin} at net.minecraftforge.fml.ModLoader.dispatchAndHandleError(ModLoader.java:186) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.ModLoader.lambda$loadMods$14(ModLoader.java:170) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at java.lang.Iterable.forEach(Iterable.java:75) ~[?:?] {re:mixin} at net.minecraftforge.fml.ModLoader.loadMods(ModLoader.java:170) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.client.loading.ClientModLoader.lambda$startModLoading$5(ClientModLoader.java:121) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at net.minecraftforge.client.loading.ClientModLoader.lambda$createRunnableWithCatch$4(ClientModLoader.java:112) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at net.minecraftforge.client.loading.ClientModLoader.startModLoading(ClientModLoader.java:121) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at net.minecraftforge.client.loading.ClientModLoader.lambda$onResourceReload$2(ClientModLoader.java:103) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at net.minecraftforge.client.loading.ClientModLoader.lambda$createRunnableWithCatch$4(ClientModLoader.java:112) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at java.util.concurrent.CompletableFuture$AsyncRun.run(CompletableFuture.java:1804) ~[?:?] {} at java.util.concurrent.CompletableFuture$AsyncRun.exec(CompletableFuture.java:1796) ~[?:?] {} at java.util.concurrent.ForkJoinTask.doExec(ForkJoinTask.java:373) ~[?:?] {} at java.util.concurrent.ForkJoinPool$WorkQueue.topLevelExec(ForkJoinPool.java:1182) ~[?:?] {} at java.util.concurrent.ForkJoinPool.scan(ForkJoinPool.java:1655) ~[?:?] {} at java.util.concurrent.ForkJoinPool.runWorker(ForkJoinPool.java:1622) ~[?:?] {} at java.util.concurrent.ForkJoinWorkerThread.run(ForkJoinWorkerThread.java:165) ~[?:?] {} Caused by: com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.io.ParsingException: Not enough data available at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.io.ParsingException.notEnoughData(ParsingException.java:22) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.io.ReaderInput.directReadChar(ReaderInput.java:36) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.io.AbstractInput.readChar(AbstractInput.java:49) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.io.AbstractInput.readCharsUntil(AbstractInput.java:123) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.toml.TableParser.parseKey(TableParser.java:166) ~[toml-3.6.4.jar%238!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.toml.TableParser.parseDottedKey(TableParser.java:145) ~[toml-3.6.4.jar%238!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.toml.TableParser.parseNormal(TableParser.java:55) ~[toml-3.6.4.jar%238!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.toml.TomlParser.parse(TomlParser.java:44) ~[toml-3.6.4.jar%238!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.toml.TomlParser.parse(TomlParser.java:37) ~[toml-3.6.4.jar%238!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.io.ConfigParser.parse(ConfigParser.java:113) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.io.ConfigParser.parse(ConfigParser.java:219) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.io.ConfigParser.parse(ConfigParser.java:202) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.file.WriteSyncFileConfig.load(WriteSyncFileConfig.java:73) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at com.electronwill.nightconfig.core.file.AutosaveCommentedFileConfig.load(AutosaveCommentedFileConfig.java:85) ~[core-3.6.4.jar%237!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigFileTypeHandler.lambda$reader$1(ConfigFileTypeHandler.java:43) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} ... 26 more

A detailed walkthrough of the error, its code path and all known details is as follows:

-- Head -- Thread: Render thread Stacktrace: at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigFileTypeHandler.lambda$reader$1(ConfigFileTypeHandler.java:47) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigTracker.openConfig(ConfigTracker.java:60) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigTracker.lambda$loadConfigs$1(ConfigTracker.java:50) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at java.lang.Iterable.forEach(Iterable.java:75) ~[?:?] {re:mixin} at java.util.Collections$SynchronizedCollection.forEach(Collections.java:2131) ~[?:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.config.ConfigTracker.loadConfigs(ConfigTracker.java:50) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.core.ModStateProvider.lambda$new$1(ModStateProvider.java:33) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading} at net.minecraftforge.fml.DistExecutor.unsafeRunWhenOn(DistExecutor.java:111) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.core.ModStateProvider.lambda$new$3(ModStateProvider.java:33) ~[forge-1.18.2-40.2.1-universal.jar%23111!/:?] {re:classloading} at net.minecraftforge.fml.ModLoader.lambda$dispatchAndHandleError$20(ModLoader.java:186) ~[fmlcore-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%23107!/:?] {} -- Overlay render details -- Details: Overlay name: net.minecraft.client.gui.screens.LoadingOverlay Stacktrace: at net.minecraft.client.renderer.GameRenderer.m_109093_(GameRenderer.java:882) ~[client-1.18.2-20220404.173914-srg.jar%23106!/:?] {re:mixin,pl:accesstransformer:B,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A,re:classloading,pl:accesstransformer:B,pl:mixin:A,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at net.minecraft.client.Minecraft.m_91383_(Minecraft.java:1046) ~[client-1.18.2-20220404.173914-srg.jar%23106!/:?] {re:mixin,pl:accesstransformer:B,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraft_runtick,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraft_runtick_render_call,xf:fml:customskinloader:MinecraftTransformer,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraftclient,xf:fml:xaerominimap:xaero_minecraftclient,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A,re:classloading,pl:accesstransformer:B,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraft_runtick,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraft_runtick_render_call,xf:fml:customskinloader:MinecraftTransformer,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraftclient,xf:fml:xaerominimap:xaero_minecraftclient,pl:mixin:APP:cgm.mixins.json:client.MinecraftMixin,pl:mixin:APP:rubidium.mixins.json:core.MixinMinecraftClient,pl:mixin:APP:tac.mixins.json:client.MinecraftStaticMixin,pl:mixin:APP:balm.mixins.json:MinecraftMixin,pl:mixin:APP:flywheel.mixins.json:PausedPartialTickAccessor,pl:mixin:APP:mixins.oculus.json:MixinMinecraft_Keybinds,pl:mixin:APP:mixins.oculus.json:MixinMinecraft_Images,pl:mixin:APP:mixins.oculus.json:MixinMinecraft_PipelineManagement,pl:mixin:APP:architectury.mixins.json:MixinMinecraft,pl:mixin:APP:playerrevive.mixins.json:MinecraftAccessor,pl:mixin:APP:create.mixins.json:WindowResizeMixin,pl:mixin:APP:securitycraft.mixins.json:camera.MinecraftMixin,pl:mixin:A,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at net.minecraft.client.Minecraft.m_91374_(Minecraft.java:665) ~[client-1.18.2-20220404.173914-srg.jar%23106!/:?] {re:mixin,pl:accesstransformer:B,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraft_runtick,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraft_runtick_render_call,xf:fml:customskinloader:MinecraftTransformer,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraftclient,xf:fml:xaerominimap:xaero_minecraftclient,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A,re:classloading,pl:accesstransformer:B,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraft_runtick,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraft_runtick_render_call,xf:fml:customskinloader:MinecraftTransformer,xf:fml:xaeroworldmap:xaero_wm_minecraftclient,xf:fml:xaerominimap:xaero_minecraftclient,pl:mixin:APP:cgm.mixins.json:client.MinecraftMixin,pl:mixin:APP:rubidium.mixins.json:core.MixinMinecraftClient,pl:mixin:APP:tac.mixins.json:client.MinecraftStaticMixin,pl:mixin:APP:balm.mixins.json:MinecraftMixin,pl:mixin:APP:flywheel.mixins.json:PausedPartialTickAccessor,pl:mixin:APP:mixins.oculus.json:MixinMinecraft_Keybinds,pl:mixin:APP:mixins.oculus.json:MixinMinecraft_Images,pl:mixin:APP:mixins.oculus.json:MixinMinecraft_PipelineManagement,pl:mixin:APP:architectury.mixins.json:MixinMinecraft,pl:mixin:APP:playerrevive.mixins.json:MinecraftAccessor,pl:mixin:APP:create.mixins.json:WindowResizeMixin,pl:mixin:APP:securitycraft.mixins.json:camera.MinecraftMixin,pl:mixin:A,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at net.minecraft.client.main.Main.main(Main.java:205) ~[client-1.18.2-20220404.173914-srg.jar%23106!/:?] {re:classloading,pl:runtimedistcleaner:A} at jdk.internal.reflect.NativeMethodAccessorImpl.invoke0(Native Method) ~[?:?] {} at jdk.internal.reflect.NativeMethodAccessorImpl.invoke(NativeMethodAccessorImpl.java:77) ~[?:?] {} at jdk.internal.reflect.DelegatingMethodAccessorImpl.invoke(DelegatingMethodAccessorImpl.java:43) ~[?:?] {} at java.lang.reflect.Method.invoke(Method.java:568) ~[?:?] {} at net.minecraftforge.fml.loading.targets.CommonClientLaunchHandler.lambda$launchService$0(CommonClientLaunchHandler.java:31) ~[fmlloader-1.18.2-40.2.1.jar%2317!/:?] {} at cpw.mods.modlauncher.LaunchServiceHandlerDecorator.launch(LaunchServiceHandlerDecorator.java:37) [modlauncher-9.1.3.jar%235!/:?] {} at cpw.mods.modlauncher.LaunchServiceHandler.launch(LaunchServiceHandler.java:53) [modlauncher-9.1.3.jar%235!/:?] {} at cpw.mods.modlauncher.LaunchServiceHandler.launch(LaunchServiceHandler.java:71) [modlauncher-9.1.3.jar%235!/:?] {} at cpw.mods.modlauncher.Launcher.run(Launcher.java:106) [modlauncher-9.1.3.jar%235!/:?] {} at cpw.mods.modlauncher.Launcher.main(Launcher.java:77) [modlauncher-9.1.3.jar%235!/:?] {} at cpw.mods.modlauncher.BootstrapLaunchConsumer.accept(BootstrapLaunchConsumer.java:26) [modlauncher-9.1.3.jar%235!/:?] {} at cpw.mods.modlauncher.BootstrapLaunchConsumer.accept(BootstrapLaunchConsumer.java:23) [modlauncher-9.1.3.jar%235!/:?] {} at cpw.mods.bootstraplauncher.BootstrapLauncher.main(BootstrapLauncher.java:149) [bootstraplauncher-1.0.0.jar:?] {}
-- Last reload -- Details: Reload number: 1 Reload reason: initial Finished: No Packs: Mod Resources, Default
-- System Details -- Details: Minecraft Version: 1.18.2 Minecraft Version ID: 1.18.2 Operating System: Windows 10 (amd64) version 10.0 Java Version: 17.0.1, Microsoft Java VM Version: OpenJDK 64-Bit Server VM (mixed mode), Microsoft Memory: 1359172232 bytes (1296 MiB) / 2147483648 bytes (2048 MiB) up to 2147483648 bytes (2048 MiB) CPUs: 12 Processor Vendor: AuthenticAMD Processor Name: AMD Ryzen 5 5600G with Radeon Graphics Identifier: AuthenticAMD Family 25 Model 80 Stepping 0 Microarchitecture: Zen 3 Frequency (GHz): 3,90 Number of physical packages: 1 Number of physical CPUs: 6 Number of logical CPUs: 12 Graphics card #0 name: AMD Radeon(TM) Graphics Graphics card #0 vendor: Advanced Micro Devices, Inc. (0x1002) Graphics card #0 VRAM (MB): 512,00 Graphics card #0 deviceId: 0x1638 Graphics card #0 versionInfo: DriverVersion=31.0.21912.14 Memory slot #0 capacity (MB): 8192,00 Memory slot #0 clockSpeed (GHz): 3,20 Memory slot #0 type: DDR4 Memory slot #1 capacity (MB): 8192,00 Memory slot #1 clockSpeed (GHz): 3,20 Memory slot #1 type: DDR4 Virtual memory max (MB): 20783,25 Virtual memory used (MB): 8882,21 Swap memory total (MB): 5120,00 Swap memory used (MB): 0,00 JVM Flags: 8 total; -XX:HeapDumpPath=MojangTricksIntelDriversForPerformance_javaw.exe_minecraft.exe.heapdump -Xmx2G -XX:+UnlockExperimentalVMOptions -XX:+UseG1GC -XX:G1NewSizePercent=20 -XX:G1ReservePercent=20 -XX:MaxGCPauseMillis=50 -XX:G1HeapRegionSize=32M Loaded Shaderpack: (off) NEC status: No NEC detected Launched Version: 1.18.2-forge-40.2.1 Backend library: LWJGL version 3.2.2 SNAPSHOT Backend API: AMD Radeon(TM) Graphics GL version 3.2.0 Core Profile Context 24.3.1.240216, ATI Technologies Inc. Window size: 854x480 GL Caps: Using framebuffer using OpenGL 3.2 GL debug messages: Using VBOs: Yes Is Modded: Definitely; Client brand changed to 'forge' Type: Client (map_client.txt) Graphics mode: fancy Resource Packs: mod_resources, vanilla Current Language: English (US) CPU: 12x AMD Ryzen 5 5600G with Radeon Graphics ModLauncher: 9.1.3+9.1.3+main.9b69c82a ModLauncher launch target: forgeclient ModLauncher naming: srg ModLauncher services: mixin PLUGINSERVICE eventbus PLUGINSERVICE slf4jfixer PLUGINSERVICE object_holder_definalize PLUGINSERVICE runtime_enum_extender PLUGINSERVICE capability_token_subclass PLUGINSERVICE accesstransformer PLUGINSERVICE runtimedistcleaner PLUGINSERVICE mixin TRANSFORMATIONSERVICE fml TRANSFORMATIONSERVICE FML Language Providers: minecraft@1.0 lowcodefml@null javafml@null Mod List: mowziesmobs-1.5.32.jar Mowzie's Mobs mowziesmobs 1.5.32 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE trashslot-forge-1.18.2-11.0.3.jar TrashSlot trashslot 11.0.3 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE flashnpcs-1.18.2-1.2.0.jar Flash's NPCs flashnpcs 1.2.0 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE cgm-1.3.3-1.18.2.jar MrCrayfish's Gun Mod cgm 1.3.3 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE infernal-expansion-1.18.2-2.5.0.jar Infernal Expansion infernalexp 2.5.0 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE trajanscore1.18.jar Trajan's Core trajanscore 1 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE CustomSkinLoader_ForgeActive-14.19.1.jar CustomSkinLoader customskinloader 14.19.1 COMMON_SETManifest: 4a:31:8b:cf:34:eb:d0:13:f3:19:39:d5:d2:b9:12:78:b5:f2:8d:91:3e:6f:8f:ed:97:48:00:69:e1:30:3a:54 nether-s-exoticism-1.18.2-1.2.6.jar Nether's Exoticism nethers_exoticism 1.2.6 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE jei-1.18.2-forge-10.2.1.1006 (1).jar Just Enough Items jei 10.2.1.1006 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE libraryferret-forge-1.18.2-4.0.0.jar Library ferret libraryferret 4.0.0 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE stalwart-dungeons-1.18.2-1.2.8.jar Stalwart Dungeons stalwart_dungeons 1.2.8 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE tac-0.3.10.1-1.18.2.jar Timeless and Classics Guns tac 0.3.10-1.18.2 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE sophisticatedcore-1.18.2-0.6.4.586.jar Sophisticated Core sophisticatedcore 1.18.2-0.6.4.586 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE rubidium-0.5.6 (3).jar Rubidium rubidium 0.5.6 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE XaerosWorldMap_1.37.8_Forge_1.18.2 (1).jar Xaero's World Map xaeroworldmap 1.37.8 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE modernlife-1.18.2-1.50.jar Modern Life modernlife 1.18.2-1.50 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE citadel-1.11.3-1.18.2.jar Citadel citadel 1.11.3 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE alexsmobs-1.18.6.jar Alex's Mobs alexsmobs 1.18.6 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE artifacts-1.18.2-4.2.3.jar Artifacts artifacts 1.18.2-4.2.3 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE OrdinaryCoins-1.0.1-Forge.jar Ordinary Coins ordinarycoins 1.0.1 COMMON_SETManifest: NOSIGNATURE sophisticatedbackpacks-1.18.2-3.20.2.1036.jar Sophisticated Backpacks sophisticatedbackpacks 1.18.2-3.20.2.1036 COMMON_SETManifest: 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Can someone help me?
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2024.03.30 05:33 rixinthemix [SPOILERS] Finished AC1 and the Ezio Trilogy. I now get the hype, but the Trilogy is not without problems.

So, a little background: I have been wanting to play the game ever since I watched Ezio march through the Vatican in the presence of the Borgias. Finally, I got the money to play the game smoothly and so the plan is to play nine main games of the franchise, from Altair to Ezio, then III, Black Flag, Rogue, Unity and Syndicate, in that order.
Overall, playing the Ezio Trilogy made me understand the hype, but also allowed me to have a more balanced and solid opinion on it. Revelations have way more glaring problems especially if you're playing it way after its initial release.
And now, we ride across the Atlantic and into ACIII!
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2024.03.23 11:41 OnlyUse4Questions Too obvious to be an original thought but Ubisoft is literally Abstergo

The only other post I saw was from a decade ago about this, though, ironically, those games from AC3 to Unity were genuinely remarkable, and if they gave them more polish, it wouldn't have been criticized as heavily. I've been playing through the series and I think it wasn't until AC3 that they really found the perfect balance between real life events and fictional. I think AC2 was hindered by all the time jumps due to the real life events of Rodrigo Borgia. I'm currently running through AC4 again and the stupid real life sections just remind me of modern Ubisoft. I wasn't a fan of Mirage at all. The animations, story, characters, all felt entirely inferior to anything pre-Origins, let alone pre-Unity.
It seems like everything Ubisoft releases is soulless and corporate. I can't think of a single thing they've made in years I've liked. I heard the Prince of Persia game by the Rayman devs was good, but that's no different than Hi-Fi Rush being the only good Xbox game in 13 years. One good game doesn't save the company.
Far Cry, Avatar, Assassin's Creed, Tom Clancy, Watch Dogs, Skull & Bones etc. All these games are somehow inferior to the older games in their series. Sometimes even graphically in the cases of Unity and Mirage, or Black Flag and Skull & Bones.
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2024.03.18 02:32 MalteseFarrell Decided to 100% each and every AC game

And let me tell you. Absolute worst gaming related decision of my life.
So far I’m just about done with AC3. So here’s my experience so far.
AC1, absolutely FUCK collecting the flags, straight to hell. It took me 2 hours and three different YouTube videos to actually find all the Kingdom ones. And then we have the “conversationalist” achievement, which is getting every optional dialogue from Lucy. On my first playthrough I had a save from sequence 2, so I figured whatever, I’ll start from there.
Little did I know you miss out on dialogue with Lucy from there. So I had to replay THE WHOLE GAME just for that one achievement.
Ezio collection was next. No issues with AC2. Brotherhood however, apparently is bugged if you have FPS boost turned on and use quick resume (I’m on Xbone Series X fyi). So Borgia flags, parachuting off Castel Saint Angelo and air assassinating 2 people from a parachute didn’t fire. So had to replay that as well.
And AC3. Fuck AC3’s achievements straight to hell. Encyclopaedia of the Common Man. I won’t go into detail - if you know you know. But fuck. Awful.
Starting AC Liberty and TOKW tonight. Fingers crossed it’s not as bad as my previous experiences.
Anyways I’ll keep you updated as I go because obviously I have nothing else going on in my life.
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2024.02.17 00:21 matte_purple Big 12 Uniform Tracker 2023: The Uniform Awards

Hello CFB! Welcome football fans to the 2023 Big XII Uniform Tracker! Let’s all get together and celebrate this wild and bittersweet season. In this extra special edition, we’ll take part in one of my favorite segments: the Uniform Awards! I'll go over the suits, helmets, and teams that really stood out from the 2023 season in the Big 12, and maybe throw in some awards for our newcomers joining next year. If you want to see my broad thoughts on each Big 12 team’s seasons and uniforms, my 2023 Season Review post is linked below!
2023 Season-in-Review Post
Grab a cocktail, light up your celebratory cigar, and settle into your most regal chair. It’s time to celebrate a season well done! A round of applause, please, for our season winners!
I’m u/matte_purple, and let's 3, 2, 1 go!
On the Up and Up - Most Improved Uniforms: Baylor Bears
Baylor is the clear number one pick here. Last year, the fanbase was apathetic towards the team and their uniform combos because they were so boring. The all green was worn 5 times last year, and a yellow piece was worn in one game during the 2022 season. While the team may have been a little disappointing this year, their uniforms were fun and took advantage of the 2019 update’s intended purpose: interchangeability. They added 3 new combos this year (including a fantastic Yellow/Yellow/Green combo, which was worn twice), added in a nice military appreciation helmet (we’ll see that later) and their annual Sailor Bear helmet looked great. I have no problem with the template itself, I’m just very glad we got to see more out of Baylor this year!
The Jayhawks refreshed their uniforms this summer to much fanfare and applause. KU was on this list last year, in first place actually, for finally beginning the process of getting rid of the KU wordmark in Trajan font - which was introduced way back in 2007. They also removed gray articles from their wardrobe, and replaced the silvery numbers of old with white or blue. But this year saw a much more substantial change. They replaced their uniforms entirely! Most notably, they added block KANSAS to the chest and redid the 2007 numbers for something timeless in the big block font. It’s reminiscent of the Gale Sayers era of Jayhawk Football, and when paired with those no-nonsense (albeit pretty standard) shoulder stripes we get a great new image for the new and improved KU. And that's just the standard suits. They introduced a new blackout alternate - aptly named “the Blackhawk” - which looked great and gave the fans some intrigue versus Illinois and Kansas State at home. Kansas only had two suits that were meh, and that's largely because they utilized the old red uniforms which will no doubt be redone this offseason.
What an update for the Cowboys from Stillwater. OK-State revamped their incredible uniforms from last year, which were last updated in 2016. The replaced the Nike Mach Speed look for the new Vapor Fusion/FUSE template, removed the slightly dated paisley design and carried over the best details. They kept the typeface developed in-house from 2019 ( it’s called “Cimarron” and looks wonderfully Western), while pairing it with the block numbers and striping from the 1980’s giving us that “Barry Sanders” feel. The 3 stripe-less pants, 4 separate jersey colors, and interchangeable logos on the helmet gives us a modern touch to a classic look while maximizing versatility. These are top notch. The only reason they weren’t higher is because some other teams went from decent to great, not excellent to fantastic. Add on a special edition homecoming suit, and the Pokes have some serious firepower.
Cincinnati was the last of the three new uniform updates in 2023. While it’s certainly an improvement, it just doesn't have that flash or pizzazz that some of the other new updates do. The big news, of course, being the transition from Under Armour “ArmourGrid” template to Nike’s The look is utilitarian in the best of ways. The removed the red and white “zipper” stripes across the upper chest of the jersey in lieu of a collar and shoulder trim, and added their famous C-Paw logo on the middle C in “Cincinnati,” on the center collar, on the pauldrons, the helmet (of course) and the side of the plain pants. I think it's a tasteful touch (even though there's a ton of them) that cuts through the cleanness and adds some identity. The red collar and shoulder trim pops well against their normal home blacks, and overall it's a much needed improvement from Under Armour. Not the best of the Big 12, but still good!
Renovation - Best Throwback: Texas Tech's 1960s Throwback
Texas Tech RB legend Donny Anderson (aka the "Golden Palomino" ) was the inspiration for this throwback set. Donny received All-American honors twice (1964 and 1965) and was a three-time all-Southwest Conference halfback (1963–65). Anderson finished fourth in the 1965 Heisman race, is in both the Texas Tech AND College Football Hall of Fame, and had big plays in both Super Bowl I AND II for the Packers. The all-around legend wore something similar to this throwback in his Texas Technological College days (and it stretched on until the late 70s). Despite it being a tri-tone that I don’t normally like, I think these are so cool. They utilize the un-beveled Double T logo, incorporate the old school gray facemask, and have those plain white shoulder stripes that look sleek when they’re modernized. My favorite touches are the subtle grayed-out Double T patterns within the number and the vintage Masked Rider logo with the cursive “Texas Tech” script embroidered on the back collar. This was the only throwback worn by the Red Raiders this year, and if they can work the design into next year’s new uniform refresh, we’ll have a big winner on our hands. I was bearish on these at first, but the more I look at them, the more I like them. Great work!
Iowa State has a rich history. Either the first or second land grant university ever - depending on who you ask (and some semantics) - there are a ton of storylines in the big book that is the Iowa Agricultural College’s history. One of the most moving is the legend of Jack Trice. The grandson of slaves, Trice was a sophomore studying animal husbandry, who wanted to get an education to assist black farmers in the South after graduation. Jack joined the football team at 19 years old, and was the first Black player to take the field at Iowa State. In only his second collegiate showing against Minnesota - October 6,1923 - Trice got to stay at the same Minneapolis hotel as his teammates, but he could not eat with them in the dining room. That night, Trice wrote a moving letter:
“My thoughts just before the first real college game of my life. The honor of my race, family, and self are at stake. Everyone is expecting me to do big things. I will! My whole body and soul are to be thrown recklessly about on the field tomorrow. Every time the ball is snapped I will be trying to do more than my part.”
During the game, Trice sustained fatal injuries after he was trampled by three Minnesota players. Though he claimed he was fine, Trice was rushed to a hospital where he died from hemorrhaged lungs two days later. These uniforms were a part of the university and athletics department’s week-long celebration honoring the 100 year anniversary of Jack Trice’s death. Outside of the stadium, university officials gave Trice a posthumous degree in animal husbandry and unveiled another sculpture in his honor, adding to his name on the stadium, a foundation awarding scholarships in his honor, and other statues on campus. The football team honored Jack by wearing throwback uniforms featuring the five chevron bars that Trice and his teammates wore in 1923. The uniforms and “AMES” helmets (harkening back to the early 1900s when ISU teams were commonly referred to as "Ames") also featured “I will” in Trice’s handwriting from the letter he wrote the night before his last game. Sure, these may not be the sleekest or iciest alternate uniform out there. But the legacy and meaning more than make up for any perceived lack of style. After all, this throwback to the burgeoning days of college football looks pretty good. If they added a white pants alt, I could see these getting even more longevity. I’m sure the helmet will make an appearance again, as it’s the best helmet they’ve worn since 2007.
Utah’s throwbacks may not have a single inspirational story behind them like these other looks, but they definitely deserve a spot on the podium for style alone. They offer plenty of details from a multitude of uniforms including: The interlocking UU logo on the helmet and pauldrons from the 1960s; Stripes on the legs and shoulders dating back to the 1970s; and my favorite touch, font brought back from the 1980s and 90s. The font is such a far cry from the normal “it’s a throwback so we’ll put block numbers” call. The red on all-white makes the details pop, and man I guess Under Armour can pull off a throwback. It’s an excellent showcase for many of the “good” uniform aspects Utah has worn in the past. I’ll admit, I wasn’t privy to a lot of Utah FB history at the start of the season, but these uniforms have made me want to learn, like all good throwbacks should.
Oklahoma State always has great uniforms, but what I love most is their ability to bring the past to life in unique ways. Why isn't this look ranked higher? Well, it's only a semi throwback. The uniforms are new, but draw from classic designs, and don’t feel vintage so much as classic. The helmets are the same story. They have older elements, most notably the logo, but it just isn’t a throwback as much as an homage. But, there was also a notorious lack of real throwbacks this year, so I felt they deserved a spot. I’ll give a brief rundown of the history, but if you want more, go to2023’s Big 12 Week 9 Unitracker Post, linked here or on my profile. Frank B. Eaton was an average Kansas kid who saw his father gunned down by a Confederate gang in 1867, when he was 7 years old. After being trained to shoot by his uncle, Moses, and learning the art of the quick draw in Ft. Gibson, Oklahoma, he became “Pistol Pete,” one of the fastest pistoleers in the West. After tracking down and killing the 5 men who were involved in his dad’s death, Frank “Pistol Pete” Eaton worked with famous lawmen like Isaac “the Hanging Judge” Parker and Sheriff Pat Garret (who killed Billy the Kid), met other famous outlaws like Bell Starr, put 11 notches on his gun, and eventually settled down in Perkins, OK. In 1923, Eaton led an Armistice Day parade in Stillwater while student committees looked to change mascots away from the Tigers. The students spoke with Eaton, and “Pistol Pete” agreed to be the living mascot for Oklahoma A&M. The rest is Oklahoma State history! These uniforms celebrate “The Year of the Cowboy,” or the 100th anniversary since Frank B. Eaton took the role of mascot at OSU. The ‘Wooly Chaps Pete” on the helm is one of the logos OK-State put out in 1984, and his signature graces the back bumper. It’s a touching tribute to a very well loved and respected man. I would have liked black pants with this look instead of a tri-color, but I still love it!
Changing up the Wardrobe - Best Alternate: Houston's Oiler Homage
It’s historical. It looks incredible. The striping and coloration? PERFECT. The Houston Cougars released a heater on Week 1 of the regular football season, and it was a stunner. These Houston Oilers inspired uniforms are a tribute to the rich history of a football-mad city, not a reminder of a franchise leaving a fan base behind. It's a shame the No Fun League issued a cease and desist to Houston for the color scheme (even though Rice also has an Oilers “throwback” that didn’t get in trouble). I really hope these come back. The fan and player reaction alike was phenomenal, they were a far cry from anything Houston normally wears, and - of course - they looked good as gold.
UCF has brought us a very close second. The University of Central Florida has become well known for their moniker of “Space U.” And the stats behind the nickname are quite impressive. I won’t give an exhaustive list (because it really is quite long), but here’s some tidbits: UCF was founded in 1963 as Florida Technological University with the goal of educating eventual personnel for the U.S. space program at Kennedy Space Center and Cape Canaveral Air Force Station. UCF is still the top supplier of graduates to the aerospace and defense industry. There are 181 students and researchers who graduated from UCF currently working on 695 separate NASA projects, as of last November. These include microgravity, searching for exoplanets, extraterrestrial habitation, finding water on other celestial bodies, improved rocket systems, and countless other practical and theoretical applications. Most importantly, UCF alumni are involved in revitalizing the Artemis program, which should send astronauts to the moon once again. This year's Mission VII (their seventh continuous year with a space game) theme was “New Horizons.” Honoring not just an expanding frontier in NASA and the Artemis program, but also UCF’s own growing horizon in Big 12 competition, these suits have detail and style a plenty. First, the notable canvas of Canaveral Blue was much lauded by viewers. Add on custom touches of the “Space U” wordmark above the curved numbers, which mimics the trajectory of rocket launches as seen from campus, a reflective gray outline that represents the “night glow” in the upper atmosphere, and a smattering of stars in the Pegasus wing pattern on the shoulders, on the leg stripe, and in the outlined UCF on the helmet. Those stars and the clever use of a rocket launching into space on the pant legs - which doubles as a Knight’s sword - are my absolute favorite touches. It feels like these are the fantastical, sleek version of UCF’s normal hyper futuristic, realism-oriented space outfits. These are definitely in the top 3 of UCF’s 7 Space U alternates. The color has shock value, every choice has an explanation, and it honors men and women in science. What more can you ask for?
I tell you what, a blackout uniform was not on my bingo card for KU in 2023. I was completely surprised when these showed up in Week 2 against Illinois. I was even more surprised when I realized I like them. Blackout uniforms are a real head scratcher for most teams. One, most teams that release them don’t use black as an official color, making for an odd scenario. Two, the popular 2008-2012 fad of “black for black’s sake” put a negative spin on every team’s alternate (and believe me, it felt like every school had one). Three, much like all-white uniforms, blackouts tend to be devoid of identity. KU has worn black in the past, in a November 2012 showing with white helmets, but these seem to be the exception and an improvement on those. The liberal use of red and blue, the circus font wordmarks, that eye-catching blue facemask, and the small identity details like the KU Battle Flag on the back collar and 1941 “Warhawk” logo on the shoulders and helmet set this apart nicely. I especially like the circus font and striping, but I wish it was the full Warhawk logo, not just the head.
The Mountaineers brought back this icon from its release last year, with a few major tweaks. What was originally just a one-time look has grown into a fan favorite with multiple options. While the same premise from last year remains (the “Cue Country Roads” sublimated roadmap, WVU state outline incorporation, and bolder striping), they instead changed the colors from primarily white and blue to a home variant with gold and blue. It’s definitely a good change! It became my favorite WVU uniform this season, but it’s not quite a “new alternate,” more of a switch up of an already existing alt, hence its honorable mention status. There's a great balance of gold and blue here. It's modern without looking corporate, and feels very genuine and true to the state of West Virginia. Great look!
Shiny Buckets – Best New Helmet: 2023 Space U Lid
We’ve already heaped praise on the Space U uniforms from this year, so I’ll keep my comments brief about my 1st Place pick. UCF looked magical in their Canaveral Blue suits, but a helmet of the same shade would have felt like too much. So instead, they topped off their suit with a crisp white helmet adorned with a star-speckled “UCF” outlined in black and a back helmet stripe mimicking the same “Rocket-Sword” design found on the uniform’s pant stripe and collar logo. The chrome facemask really sells me on it, too. It's outstanding that the entire uniform was distilled into a helmet that can stand on its own, look wise. A very impressive showing for UCF!
Similar to UCF, we’ve admired the alternates brought to us by Iowa State enough, so I’ll stick to the basics. These revamped “AMES” helmets bring viewers back to the early 1900s when ISU teams were commonly referred to as "Ames.” The all-white helmets feature an “I will” in red in Trice’s handwriting on the back bumper, and the gray facemask not only complements the gray chevrons on the jersey, but stands nicely on its own and adds a touch of vintage to an already great lid. I love it.
WVU had two new helmets this year. One was obviously the blue state outline logo helmet that accompanied the “Cue Country Roads” home alternate, and the other was the white-shelled state outline lid worn twice this year. I picked the white version because it feels more versatile than the former helmet. Don’t get me wrong, the “Country Roads” helm with the sublimated road map, on-point striping, and sweet logo is incredible. But there’s something about the crispness of the white shell sporting the blue West Virginia state outline and the bright yellow Flying WV logo; they just pop so perfectly! The no-stripe complements the all-white and White on Blue away combos both AND added a rarely seen blue facemask (usually WVU goes for a black or white facemask). These just feel like solid workhorse helmets that have a good ratio of WVU’s colors. No frills, but super classy. Like a crisp navy business suit with no tie.
TCU had several new helmets this year; they had this one, the first new one of the year (plus two other shell colors) and the annual Bloody threads helmet. Why does this one stand out? One, I love the white shell. It’s so professional, clean, and makes the purple in this particular uniform combo pop. The helmet itself pops against the black jersey. Two, I LOVE that they removed the TCU letters from the logo on this one. Similar to Arkansas or KU, the Horned Frog is an incredibly unique college mascot. The logo itself does not need the additional identifier of “TCU”. It’s the same reason I liked last year’s “Sooner Slayer” helmet (which you can find in the 2022 Awards post pinned to my profile). Lastly, that tiny pop of red on the eyes is the perfect cherry on top. Why didn’t I put the bloody threads helmet up here? Because it’s entirely reliant on the rest of the uniform AND they added those weird “frogskin” lines sublimated on the shell. I love the old school logo on top, but it just felt like a weaker version of a normally strong Blood Threads alternate. A great honorable mention for TCU.
Gridiron Runway - Best Conference Matchup: BYU vs Texas
Well hot damn! This Week 9 contest was to die for. While the game itself was a little lopsided, the uniforms looked just right. Each of the team's three pieces had a direct contrast, producing complementary colors. The burnt orange against the deep navy, all tied together by crisp white, made both relatively muted colors jump out at you. BYU obviously loves their royal blue standard, but sometimes it’s nice to see variety! The navy is a wonderful departure from the regular, feels more vintage than it really is, and was paired perfectly against the Longhorn’s slimmed down suits that were altered slightly in 2022. It's a matchup of elegant simplicity. Neither team changed logos or striping to break the mold, and yet it turned out beautifully. Easily my favorite matchup from this season.
They were in here last season, and they placed again: Bedlam continues to be a fiery one. Last year, we saw OK-State rock their Orange/White/Orange Cursive Cowboy suits against OU’s standard home threads, which placed 2nd in this same category (see my other pinned post in my profile for those awards). This year, they swapped, with OSU donning a foreboding Black/Black/Orange combo - also with the Cursive Cowboys logo - against the Sooner’s mostly white road suits, which haven’t changed much since the 1930s. It's a classic case of traditional vs novel modernism. The Cowboy’s new 2023 uniforms made things a little less busy past templates AND added a little retro flair, but the rivals are still pretty dichotomic when it comes to the uniforms. The symmetry of B/B/O and Red/W/W is an added bonus. This just feels right. I really hope we see Bedlam in the future, despite the conference shake-up.
The Mountaineers continue to make rounds. This Week 11 matchup hit hard because of the monochromatic, almost black and white feel. But this time, it had a twist. WVU perfectly paired their whiteouts against OU’s anthracite “Unity” alternates for a refreshingly novel matchup. WVU relaunched their new cleaned up state outline helmet to great effect, and the small detailing of blue vs crimson feels right. Also, if you look closely, you’ll see that OU has a similar state outline of Oklahoma on their pauldron. This is a rare occurrence of OU’s alternates being used to scratch an itch that the standard uniforms just wouldn’t have got to. Both of these uniforms are fine when apart, but putting them better easily slots them in at 3rd place.
This may seem like a bit of KSU favoritism for the honorable mention, but I only need to say two words to get everyone on my side: SNOW GAME. Who doesn’t love a snow game? Seeing that purple and silver gleam in the wintery weather should make any Big 12 game happy. Plus, Iowa State’s kinda-camo away uniforms also did a good job. The red accents really jump out at you when the field is all white. (It’s worth mentioning, as I type this, Abu Sama III just ran for another 70+ yd TD). What a way to end the regular season. Although, I do wish the Cyclones would have worn their new “AMES” helmets, just to go full on polar bear. Regardless, this was a gorgeous, frozen game to behold.
Friends from Out West - Best Newcomer Uniform Team: Arizona State Sun Devils
Arizona State was a part of Nike’s flagship uniform crew that included Oklahoma State, Wazzu, Kentucky, TCU and Wyoming in 2011. That really gave the Sun Devils a jump start on the modern trend of using lots of alternates, switchups, and logos. They refreshed their uniforms this past summer, but kept the same versatility mantra in mind during the season. They wore their older suits twice early on in the season, but moved on to what most have said is a sleek and tasteful use of some pretty intense colors. Add on new white helmet shells that haven’t been worn regularly since 2019 (and one worn in 2020), and you’ve got a recipe for a badass uniform rotation. Sparky is iconic, the color scheme just radiates “Southwest,” the trident is decent, and a couple neat alternates (like the glow-in-the-dark “Ghost Story” alts from Week 9) make this team fun to track. They are easily my favorite uniform team of the newcomers. Who knows, though? Definitely subject to change.
The Utes from SLC, Utah have some of the better Under Armour templates I’ve seen. Contrast these to teams like, say, Texas Tech. The coloration is clean. The stripes aren’t wild or adventurous while still feeling different. There’s a subtle use of gray as an accent. The classic and recognizable logo (akin to a certain Double T) is kept simple and uncomplicated. And that’s just their regular uniforms. Utah wore alternates 4 (5 if you want to count the painted helmet) times this year, including their “Ute Proud” suits, and two throwbacks (2 away showings, one home). While I’m honestly not a huge fan of Utah’s hand-painted helmets trend, these ones were received well. The talking point that gets me most excited for Utah’s uniforms are, of course, the throwbacks. I’m very interested to see if anything is different coming into their inaugural Big 12 2024 season.
Colorado had a decent showing, and we all know Coach Prime values style, but most of these uniforms felt like they were hodge-podged together from different templates and sets from days past. It doesn’t help that they still wear Nike’s “Flywire” fabric (check the center collar for proof). There were definitely some bright spots, though! Their 2023 opener versus TCU found a little later is a testament to that. Mostly, I’m more excited for what they bring to the table uniform wise next year. Deion Sanders has already confirmed new uniforms are coming to the Buffs before the 2024 season, and boy am I excited for them. With their history, tradition, and a bonafide debonair dresser as coach, you know CU has an opportunity to impress. Watch out!
Arizona slid in at the honorable mention spot not because they have bad suits; on the contrary, their uniforms are very stylish. I just feel like Arizona is a team that tried the uniform experiment and decided to go the traditional route. Their “Desert Swarm” revamps from the Dick Tomey era are still going strong, but apart from those and the variance that comes with them, they just don’t really do alternates. Their lone exception was a military tribute that I thought was touching. Stylish and consistent, but nothing extraordinary. Same as how I feel about OU, Arkansas, or BYU. We’ll see if they do anything wild in 2024. I do like the mismatched striping, though. That is a touch that should remain the “Arizona thing.”
Yikes! - Worst Conference Matchups: The Revivalry - Baylor at TCU
Holy acid trip, Batman! Whatever the expression is for the opposite of “feast for the eyes,” that's what this was. Both of these uniform combos were highly anticipated by both fanbases, and hell, I was excited for them, too! But they chose the absolute worst game to put them together. Anthracite, purple, red, green, yellow, and white sounds like the colors you see in an oil slick. Man, I had such high hopes for these uniforms individually. Especially the cool TCU horned Frog logo. Let's move on, it’s too painful.
The Mountaineers wore all-yellow against a white-and-red team. This just kind of felt like a Heinz commercial to me, with lots of mustard and a little bit of ketchup. There were times when it worked on the field and times where it definitely didn't, so I was left going back and forth. Plus, TTU just cannot rock a red helmet while the Bevel T stays red. A weird game, to be sure.
Kansas fumbled this one HARD. After upsetting the Sooners in their brand-spanking new uniforms and wearing a solid updated suit in their win against the Cyclones in Ames, they decided to bring back their out-dated red uniforms against Texas Tech. In doing so, they reminded fans of the old Big 12 basement-dweller out there, not the Jayhawk squad that had just been tearing up the conference. Plus, the Blue/Red/Blue combo felt especially weird - almost like 3D glasses. This game could have looked spectacular with a mostly blue suit versus Tech’s all white. This was a weird move backwards for KU, but was quickly remedied. Hopefully we’ll see a red update this summer.
Not as bad as the others, but isn’t it ironic that the team normally known for wearing controversial blackout uniforms played against a team that wore an inexplicable blackout uniform? BYU already has such a recognizable color that using it on a blackout look feels almost wasteful somehow. At least last year’s version had a gradient (which I still didn’t like). Black just doesn’t suit the Cougars.
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Far from Regular – Best Non-Con Uniform Matchup: Baylor vs Texas State
As we are nearing the end, I thought it would be fun to look at some of the matchups against non-Big 12 opponents we saw in the conference, and wow, we had some great ones.
Baylor vs Texas State in Week 1 was a hell of a game. The same matchup last year resulted in a hard loss for the Bobcats, and they clearly used that blowout as a motivator, starting the 2023 season by punching the Bears in the mouth. The 2022 matchup -which slotted in at #2 last year - also started my pet project for Texas State. I’ve become a huge fan of their EQ team and uniforms (especially their use of gold and black as accents to that beautiful maroon and white). This particular game saw both teams’ best uniforms. Baylor wore a brand new combo that looked gorgeous, and contrasted the yellow nicely, while the green pants paired with TXST’s maroon bottoms. The use of gold, again, really does the trick. It’s not meant to be flashy or in your face, but adds that extra pizzazz to an already stellar look.
Speaking of gold, Colorado wore one of my favorite “icy-white” combos of the season, incorporating a healthy amount of gold leaf to their logo and jersey numbers. TCU challenged the look with some classy use of silver on the Horned Frog logo and collar accents, and of course rocking that deep purple that I love so much. If Colorado can replicate something like this in their new 2024 suits, they will have struck gold (ha! Get it?)
While not an out-of-conference game for the Big 12 per se, this uniform clash definitely felt good enough to medal at the podium. I mean come on! In the first year after a hiatus from white helmets, the Sun Devils drop this heater of a helmet against Washington's purple chrome alternates? I’m in love. The gold used by the Huskies would have fought hard with any yellow worn by ASU, so they kept it simple and complemented a dark heavy UW look with a crisp and clean white look. There are enough splashes of maroon to keep the Sun Devils from looking generic, and the filled in trident does wonders for coloring the helmet. Speaking of the trident, the normally hated “leg trident” on ASU’s pants actually helps the Sun Devils maintain an identity in all-white scenarios like this. Curse you, ASU for proving me wrong! Damn, this was gorgeous. Also, Washington definitely should have worn this alternate again in an encore at some point. What a beautiful matchup.
Obviously, WVU has impressed me this season, and I’m sure you’re tired of hearing about them, so I’ll instead talk about those dashing argyle designs worn by UNC! I loved the interposing of sleek argyle geometric Carolina blue against the swirling, curved, almost chaotic yellow and dark blue of WVU’s sublimated road design. The lightness of the blue and white makes this combo feel almost airy, and the black outline of the black numbers adds just a touch of edge. Both are perfectly emblematic of each school and complemented each other in the best of ways. The perfect way to round out our categorical awards.
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Drumroll please... The moment you’ve all been waiting for!
Best of the Best - Big XII 2023 Uniform Team of the Year: Oklahoma State Cowboys
Kansas! I have a love-hate relationship with these uniforms, because a K-Stater like me can’t stand the idea of admiring anything KU. But here we are. The Jayhawks refreshed their suits to better declare “We are in a new era,” and not just of KU Football, but Big 12 ball as a whole. They kept it simple, had fun with some alternates, ditched the KU “trajan” font and embraced the fan’s opinions and ideas. KU Football EQ Manager Darren Hain should be proud. These uniforms look great, but there were just a few too many odd moments to put them in the top 3 for me. Still a fantastic season for the Jayhawks! I bet we’ll see a refreshed red jersey in the future.
In 2019, Baylor introduced a uniform refresh that - while a little pedestrian - promised versatility and interchangeability in their suits. That hasn’t really been experimented with until this year. After hearing Baylor fans complain about how “We only ever wear all-green!” game after game in 2022, 3 new color combos (including my favorite Yellow/Yellow/Green), 2 fun alternate helmets, and a spaced-out usage of their all-green workhorse look felt like cool water on a hot Texas day. The simplified design lends itself so well to unique options, and they had a great balance of variety and tradition. I’ll be honest, watching the Bears was rough at times, but these uniforms made it all worth it! A much-improved year for Baylor, at least threads-wise. Here’s to some hopeful alternates in 2024! Great work!
WVU may not have been as flashy with their new releases as some other teams, but their two new helmets, one new uniform, handsome use of gray, wide variety of combos, and overall insight into contrasting colors during matchups made for one hell of a fashionable season. It seemed like the Mountaineers felt their swagger on the field, and played like it, too. Dan Nehlen and Kyle Keesler of the WVU Football EQ team should be very proud of their efforts off the field. If WVU continues their magnificent attention to detail and style, we may see them take down the top spot soon.
Ok, here it is. I know the Pokes won first place last year, but there’s honestly no way I can put someone else up there. OK-State took their already award-winning fan favorite uniforms and updated them further. They removed everything that appeared dated, added some traditional elements while keeping an edge, and maintained a beautiful color consistency. Uniform variety is fun, but so is tradition and brand recognition. Oklahoma State always does an incredible job of honoring the brand while also fostering an engaging variety. Recruits want combos and recognition, fans want to feel involved and listened to, and it seems like both recruiting and fan engagement goes up when uniforms are involved. Plus, the adage remains true: “look good, play good.” No one should be afraid of looking their best or being proud that their favorite team looks their best, or just talking about how their favorite team looks, and OK-State gets it right 99% of the time. I have two gripes with the uniforms, and it’s that the template puts the chest wordmark slightly too low, and the cinched sleeves keep slipping off the pads. That's it! OK-State continues to bring it every week, especially with these brand-new uniforms. Congrats to the Cowboys for another fantastic and fashionable season and enjoy the prestige of being the 2023 Big XII Uniform Team of the Year!
And just like that, I’m all finished up! 2023 in uniforms is officially over, and the 2024 offseason is upon us. Thank you for indulging my hobby with the Big XII’s uniforms, regardless of if you’re a casual lurker or a hardcore uniform enthusiast. Your comments are appreciated, and I love the feedback I've received over the past few months. I hope I could brighten your day, or at the very least pique your interest. Enjoy yourselves, stay warm out there, and keep an eye out for individual team uniform rankings in the coming months! See you soon, in America’s best dressed football conference!
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2024.01.31 23:40 matte_purple Big 12 2023 Uniform Tracker: Season-in-Review

Hello CFB! Welcome to the 2023 Big XII Uniform Season Review! In this historical/bittersweet year, we saw some impressive ball, added four teams, 2 are gearing up to leave, while another 4 are on the way. It’s been wild. We’re all proud of our Big XII teams, let’s check it out.
In this edition of the tracker, we’ll review each team’s different suits, my favorite and least favorite looks (helpfully labeled by Helmet/Jersey/Pants color), and a brief summary of my thoughts moving forward, uniforms and otherwise. And remember, “worst” is not an indicator of being a “bad combo” unless I explicitly say so, and apart from one or two, I’m sure they'll be alright. After that, I’ll give out my favorite content of the season in THE Big 12 2023 Uniform Awards, which will be a hoot. Later on, I’ll rank each team’s uniforms (that sweet offseason content) but for now we’ll get into it.
I’m u/matte_purple, and let's 3,2,1 go!
#3 University of Texas Longhorns(12-2)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/Adp4Tky
Number of Combos: 2 Best: White/Orange/White Worst: White/White/White
The last time UT Football produced a 12-win season and a Big 12 Title was 2009 with QB Colt McCoy. The program is - say it with me everyone! - BACK. From a Big 12 fan perspective, it's a bittersweet. You have a nationally recognized program with wide appeal that had several exciting games, tons of success, a tough but fair path to the Big 12 Championship, and a playoff appearance to show for it. But, they're also leaving for the SEC. It stings. I, for one, am a little sad about them leaving. They have a great roster, Quinn Ewers returning for another round, and a top 10 class on the way. Short of a Natty appearance, this was about everything a UT fan could have wanted. Your only losses being OU and the eventual CFB runner-up? That's a sweet deal. Here’s to your time in the SEC.
Obviously, UT doesn’t switch it up very often (in fact, it's been the same overall template since the 50s). There were a few changes introduced in 2022, notably removing the Longhorn on the collar, as well as the TV numbers on the top of the shoulders. Both design features appeared in 2013, when Texas upgraded to Nike’s Pro Combat Hypercool template. By virtue of my own template, I have to pick my least favorite of the two combos, so I’ll pick the away. The power and recognizability of the burnt orange jersey really does it for me. But of course, both looks are very nice (obviously, otherwise they wouldn't have stayed the same for nearly 75 years). The bold “Texas” on the front, which was first added in 1959, and reappearing in 1983-present, takes the cake. That's it for the Longhorns. What a season, now go kick some SEC butt!
#16 Oklahoma State Cowboys(10-4)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/zBT21Da
Number of Combos: 13 Best: Black/Black/Orange Worst: Orange/White/Black
Roller coaster. Struggles at the start of 2023, including a rotating QB carousel, and hard losses to South Alabama and ISU, put a severe damper on the mood in Stilly. Then followed a domination of some Big 12 heavy hitters - including an excellent Bedlam win - before dropping an inexplicable 45-3 loss to a battered UCF. How do you have so many highs, lows, and nail-biters in a season? Ultimately, HC Mike Gundy, QB Alan Bowman (who will come back for his 7th season!), and game-breaking RB Ollie Gordon II led the Cowboys to a nice season, culminating in a pretty great bowl game, a tough Big 12 champ game, and a build-up to what should be a wild 2024 season. Don’t count out the Pokes, because they’ll still find a way.
The Cowboys did something I did not expect. They refreshed their already incredible uniforms this summer into ones that may not be beat. Oklahoma State always manages to get the balancing act of honoring brand and tradition while also fostering an exciting variety right. My favorite is the Black/Black Orange from Bedlam. It has all of the benefits of a blackout while keeping the sweet splash of orange. It’s mean as hell, gets the color ratio right, and exemplifies the new update really spectacularly. Last on my list was their combo worn against UCF. Not only was it the same combo worn in KSU’s blowout last year, but it was also featured in the disastrous 2023 UCF game. It feels unbalanced for a tricolor, the black weighs it down. It’s a shame that the orange shell helmet has to be put this low, as it’s my favorite Cursive shell. Some of my other favorites from the Cowboys include their all-blacks worn vs UT and KSU, their W/W/O option in Week 2, and their orange suits versus KU. Give them a look!
#15 University of Oklahoma Sooners(10-3)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/Vnt1z8I
Number of Combos: 3 Best: Red/White/White Worst: Gray/Gray/Gray
The other half of the SEC bound duo didn’t fare quite as well as UT, but they still did alright! Obviously, the season was a step up from 2022’s 6-7. HC Venables schemed his way to 80th nationally in total defense and 49th in scoring defense and his youthful team showed great execution in most of their games. QB Gabriel even had a game against WVU where he threw for 5 TDs and ran for 3. That's the real deal. They only lost to OSU, KU, and AZ, which were all great teams this season. They are in a great position heading into the SEC, and are slated to play some very tough teams next year. I’m going to miss OU, just like Texas. I have enjoyed KSU and OU’s recent history, but seriously, good luck in the SEC, Sooners.
Uniform-wise, this year was actually rather similar to last year for the sooners. The last time OU updated their suits - even in a minor fashion - was 2018 in their move to the Jordan brand. They also filled out the OU logo on top and changed the font on the “Sooners” up front. The anthracite uniform was released last year and was the only alternate worn this year, so overall it was a fairly pedestrian season for uniforms. My favorite of the three was the away look, simply for the fact that the home uniform has many similar looks across the nation. The white has a little bit more originality, it’s got a nice bit of color, and really pops against the home team. Since I have to pick a “least favorite,” I went with the “Unity” uniforms. I actually like it a lot. I think the color is great, and the story is even better. They honor OU alum Prentice Gautt, the first Black scholarship player for the Sooners, starring as a RB from 1957 to '59. And he played in the NFL! The anthracite uniforms sport the word "unity" on the nameplate, with "together" sewn on the collar. Also featured is the OK state outline on the pauldrons. I especially love that. But the stripe down the helmet doesn’t match the other stripes on the shoulders/pants, and it looks like there were a few helmets that were painted matte, not glossy, so it finds itself in my least favorite OU uniform of the year. Maybe we’ll see more alternates in the SEC? I’m just glad we didn’t get the “Lay Down the Wood” alternates this season.
#18 Kansas State University Wildcats (9-4)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/FlLUvZm
Number of Combos: 2 Best: SilveWhite/Silver Worst: SilvePurple/White
Should this season feel like a disappointment for Wildcat fans? It’s hard to say. They had some VERY good games that went close. The Missouri game was lost thanks to a SEC record-breaking 61-yd FG, OSU was a weird case of black magic in Stilly, and their UT game was lost thanks to some odd OT play-calling and crucial special teams errors. Change around some possessions and you would have had a hell of a season. Sprinkle in some magic from true-freshman QB Avery Johnson (5 rushing TDs against TTU - the first to do it in the Big XII since Collin Klein in 2012 - and an efficient Pop-Tart MVP Bowl showing), and QB Will Howard, who led K-State to a wild 246-72 against losing opponents at home and broke KSU’s passing TD record. The lone loss at home was to ISU in a snowy version of Farmageddon. Some staff turnover, QB Will Howard leaving for Ohio State, and some tough NFL Draft and transfer exits will make things hard, but remember, they still have a great RB in Giddens, good WR transfers, proven QB Avery Johnson, and former TTU coach Matt Wells to work as OC. Weird, but still good, season for the ‘Cats.
Well, it’s another average year for the ‘Cats. K-State wore 3 combos last year and cut out their one alt this year. Just like UT, KSU has a style, and they stick to it. Bill Snyder introduced this look in ‘89, his first season at KSU. He threw in a helmet for military appreciation three times, but that’s it. HC Chris Klieman and his EQ team have maintained much of the same idea, only releasing alternates 2 times in his 5 years (changing silver to white twice doesn't really count in my book). That could change with a renewed Nike contract though. He’s been quoted as saying they can “start exploring those options” earlier this year. Just like last year, I chose the away look as my favorite because it looks so good against most every home uniform out there. I mean, take a look at that OSU vs K-State look? Or vs KU’s black alt? That silver shines nice above the white. The home is definitely good as well, just not quite as dashing. From here on out, we get lots more variety in our teams!
West Virginia University Mountaineers (9-4)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/h4SHYPS
Number of Combos: 11 Best: Blue/Yellow/Blue Worst: Yellow/Yellow/Yellow
One of the most surprising Big 12 teams in 2023. Just months after Neal Brown rumors swirled, QB JT Daniels transferred, and hope seemed lost, they rose up and made a pretty great run. WVU was slotted at the bottom of the preseason poll, and they took that personally. QB Garret Greene was promoted to starter, the defense survived some tough injuries, and RB Jahiem White emerged, who will no doubt become a big part of the offense moving on. WVU closed out the season winning ⅘ games, losing to OK-State, OU, Penn, and a miraculous Hail Mary from Houston. Closing out the season with Neal Brown covered in Mayo with 9 wins is a lot better than what many Big 12 fans expected. They are riding high into the offseason!
WVU really knocked it out of the park. They only had a few looks that I thought were okay. For the most part, every look they wore had a lot of style. My least favorite were the “Gold-Rush” uniforms, simply because it’s so yellow. I think they tend to be most fans' least favorite. My favorite was the new version of the “Country Roads” suit introduced vs Pitt last year. While that version was primarily white, this year’s was a beautiful home variety that was perfect for the Backyard Brawl. It was also worn against UNC to great effect. The sublimated road map, the state outline logo with the Flying WV on the inside, the consistent striping on the helmet and pants, all topped off by the “Mountaineers” on the chest. This isn’t as retro as, say, the new OK-State suits or Texas Tech throwbacks, but they aren’t meant to be. It’s modern without looking corporate, and feels genuine. It's a sleek way to end their uniform year. Other stars include their standard home outfit of B/B/Y and my favorite away look, their W/W/B with the state-outlined flying WV on the helm from Week 5.
#23 University of Kansas Jayhawks(9-4)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/JamagD0
Number of Combos: 12 Best: Blue/Blue/Red Worst: Blue/Red/Blue
The last two seasons of KU football have been the best since 2007. HC Lance Liepold inherited a demoralized program after Les Miles was removed, but he’s turned it into something promising. They finished the season ranked for the first time in 16 years, and finished with a winning record and bowl victory for the first time in 15. KU opened the season with four wins, upset #6 OU in an instant classic, and won a bowl game against UNLV. Aside from a weird loss to TTU, a heartbreaker against KSU, and “normal” losses to UT and OK-State, KU continues to be a rising star. With new uniforms and alts, competitive Ws and Ls, a new stadium coming soon, and some star talent, this team is a phoenix. I’m excited to see what happens next year! This is about as nice as I can be to KU, so moving on!
The Jayhawks were one of three Big 12 schools that updated their uniforms over the summer. And to wide acclaim, I might add. It’s clean and cohesive, and the “Kansas” wordmark projects a confidence that was severely lacking with the old look. The “KU” letter logo is thankfully going away. It was only worn once last year and zero times this year. The shoulder stripes outlined in red is another great touch. Speaking of Trajan font, it’s the main reason I picked the Blue/Red/Blue as my least favorite combo. First, why would you continue to use an “outdated” jersey when you have a revamped blue jersey? It just reminds fans of the old KU. Second, why did they decide to wear primarily red against TTU? The whole combo reminded me of 3D glasses, and just felt disjointed. The B/B/R combo vs UCF was actually my favorite. It got the ratio of blue-red right, with the facemask tying the pants and the shoulder stripes together. No stripes on the helmet helps, too. My 2nd favorite was the all-white worn against Nevada in Week 3. It’s beautiful (and the winning combo I chose last year). The stripes on the helmet not matching the rest of the design puts it down one peg. Their blackout suits will definitely make an appearance in the Uniform Awards, so stay tuned.
Iowa State University Cyclones (7-6)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/OUycgfa
Number of Combos: 8 Best: White/White/Red Worst: Red/Red/Red
With six winning seasons in seven years, ISU under Campbell is having its best years since the 1910s. They bounced back from some gambling scandal news, ended with high performing and record setting play by QB Rocco Becht, four-straight road W’s - a school record - and 21 underclassmen and six true freshmen making big plays this season. Aside from some head-scratching losses to Ohio, Memphis, and Iowa, the others were competitive and fun (especially that Farmageddon game, right Cyclones?) I look forward to seeing their path in the new Big 12!
This was ISU’s most ambitious uniform year since their 2018 refresh. Apart from “blackout madness” that was the year 2020 for the ‘Clones, we saw lots of new ideas here, including two alt helmets. Their new black and cardinal helmet was worn twice in 2018 and once in 2019 before returning in Week 12 of 2023. I personally like it way more than the black/white Block I helmets (my main gripe with the blackouts is the lack of cardinal accents). But the next suit was BEAUTIFUL. The Jack Trice throwback featuring the chevrons that Trice and his team wore in 1923 was executed well, and brought us the best helmet they’ve worn since 1994 and 2007. The Ames helmet is simple and a beauty. Sure, this suit isn’t the sleekest alternate uniform out there. But the legacy, and history more than make up for the slightly odd tan pants look. My subjective best look is certainly that White/White/Red look worn against BU in Week 9. If ISU is going to continue to use the Block I logo, they may as well put it on a helmet that pops, and the cardinal accents paired with the bold pants looks smooth. Their worst - IMO - was the all-red suit worn in the bowl. It’s just so much red. Hot colors all in one big block looks clunky without suitable accents, and a primarily red logo doesn't stand out. Perfect time to add a vintage more yellow logo to the helm, perhaps? Overall felt like a sweet spot season with good throwbacks, fun spins on the regulars, and a perfect use of the black uniforms.
Texas Tech University Red Raiders (7-6)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/kRrjnXk
Number of Combos: 10 Best: Black/Black/Black Worst: Red/White/Red
The much hyped Red Raiders had a tough year. 2016 with Mahomes was the last time a TTU QB has started every season game. 2023 QB Tyler Shough suffered a broken leg in the season’s first Big 12 game. The injuries were tough for TTU through 2023, but to have to play three different QBs for several consecutive years is the equivalent of a dead man’s hand in modern CFB. Apart from the QB heartbreak, I think Tech finished strong in Nov. for Joey McGuire’s 2nd year. We saw some needed maturation from both QB Behren Morton and OC Zack Kittley. We saw some promising snaps from young guys, which will be important with some big seniority turnover on the sideline. Add on a top 25 recruiting class for 2024, and there is still plenty of reason to be optimistic for 2024. Hopefully the witch doctor in charge of the QBs can stop messing around. A disappointing season for TTU, but it may set up the pieces for something great.
I found myself looking ahead to the 2024 Adidas refresh during many weekends of the tracker. Not to say that TTU’s current closet is bad, it’s just lacking. We’ve seen what a great update can do for KU and OK-State, and Texas Tech deserves it. They struck gold in 2022 with their throwbacks (including this year’s 1978 throwback in Week 3), but we really need a clean slate. Luckily, the Adidas x Mahomes deal can swoop in and save TTU from the odd dual-tone stripes on the pants, chevron shoulder stripe, and small font on the chest. My standouts on the season were the Black/Red/Black combos worn 3 times this season, the 1978 look, and my top choice, the blackout worn against KSU in Week 7. All-black looks great when it’s actually a school color, and the red and white feels punchy on a black canvas. I’m excited to see it redone next season! My least favorite was the Red/White/Red worn against WVU’s all-yellow. The yellow did it no favors, but the Double T logo is literally 99% red. Putting it on a red helmet just isn’t right. It was the only time red helmets were worn this season. Keep your chin up, Tech fans. We’ll get through it!
University of Central Florida Knights (6-7)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/gYErwiN
Number of Combos: 11 Best: White/Blue/Blue Worst: Gold/White/Black
By far the most successful of the new four, they had a rocky season as well. After a steady non-con, they suffered loss after loss until the UC game, and then a magical blowout upset at home against Bedlam-winning OSU. They then suffered two more losses, including a one against GT in their bowl. Not a horrible start to their Big 12 career, but there’s lots to improve. Helping in the offseason are returning stars RJ Harvey, one of the better RBs in the Big 12, and WR Javon Baker, both important cogs in the UCF siege engine. They'll have a busy off-season in Orlando, but in Gus we Trust!
One thing that always rubs me the wrong way in most teams are “tri-color” or “mismatched” looks.Teams usually look best with some symmetry or majority color to them. The one exception to the rule is UCF. When your colors are all “intermediate” like white, gold, or black, as opposed to teams with bolder colors, you can squeak over the line. UCF wore a tri-color three times and looked decent in all of them. The mismatched lightmode suit versus Cincy in Week 10 was the only one I didn’t care for, due to the odd font style. The lightmode concept worked okay when paired with all white and similar accents, but it just looks cobbled together when pieced with other templates. Their best combo is, of course, the Space U game combo. The specialty suit has a unique shock of canaveral blue, a fantastic new helmet, and tons of Easter eggs and fun design choices make this one a treat. I’ll talk about it more in both the uniform awards and the UCF uniform ranker that will come later in the offseason, but just know I absolutely adore it. My favorite non-alternates are the White/Black/White combo worn in Week 9 against WVU and the all-black stunner with the alternate knight logo worn vs Houston.
Texas Christian University Horned Frogs (5-7)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/1WgQy8H
Number of Combos: 12 Best: White/White/White Worst: White/White/Black
What a fall from grace for the Horned Frogs. After being America’s darling in the last months of the 2022 season, they won only 3 Big 12 games. Their DC was let go, OC Briles felt inconsistent, and a few hopeful NFL departing draftees makes for an interesting off-season. The team failed to qualify for a bowl game, marking the first time since 2010 that a team who reached the CFP Title game failed to earn bowl eligibility the following season. On the bright side, redshirt Freshman QB Josh Hoover has some promise. The youth of the team as a whole has promise. Once he gets more experience and competition with Morris coming back in the spring and can get better at ball protection, I think there’s some opportunity for a higher ranking. Plus, TCU has a record of 53-11 following a losing season, so history is on their side!
TCU carried over 4 combos from the 2022 season, including the all-white combo that is definitely my favorite uniform of their season. But for the most part, aside from the bright spots of the new “frog-only” logo helmets and some novel new combos (like the all-purple, White/Black/Black, and Purple/Black/Purple), the season felt like a tad downgrade over last year’s uniforms. I can’t put a pin on it. But in my opinion, TCU looks great in black with purple accents. The inverse just feels off. The exceptions are the all-white and the White/Purple/White worn vs CU. My least favorite combo (W/W/B at K-State) really felt bland. The plain black pants make me sad when added to the white canvas. They throw off the rest of the suit balance wise, especially considering the only other black on the suit are like 3 of the collar’s diamonds. This suit could have really raised some eyebrows with a black helmet, or another all-white rendition. Slightly worse than last year, but I still really enjoy the variety from the ‘Frogs.
Brigham Young University Cougars (5-7)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/Vl4CqIL
Number of Combos: 11 Best: White/Royal/White Worst: Black/Black/Black
There was a lot of hype for BYU’s inaugural Big 12 season. The Cougars waited 12 years for an invite since going Independent from the Mountain West. Behind transfer QB Kedon Slovis, the Cougars were able to go undefeated in their non-conference play, highlighted by an exciting road win over Arkansas. And then reality struck. They won against Cincinnati in their conference home opener, and Texas Tech in a home night game, but lost every game afterwards. They had very real chances to knock off Oklahoma and Oklahoma State (in 2OT) at the end of the season, but couldn’t finish. A tough time full of questions for BYU, but I think the most glaring issue is a lack of experience in this conference. With some playing time, both coaches and players alike WILL be better next year.
BYU does the whole tradition thing very similar to K-State, Texas, and OU, with the only variety being the colors. All of these looks - except for the black uniforms they introduced this year - feel very traditional and classic. In fact, I’d bet you could show any one of the royal or navy combos to a non-football fan and convince them they were the preeminent BYU look. But one of them takes the cake: The White/Royal/White combo dates back to 1969, was worn by BYU in their 1984 national title season, and were brought back to wide acclaim in 2009. They have been worn frequently ever since. And boy, is there a reason for it. The beautiful color, the symmetry, the consistent striping, the iconic logo, this is the one. I love variety in uniforms, but this one should be celebrated. I also really enjoyed their Navy/White/Navy and even their all-navy look. Their worst look, as mentioned before, is the all-black. Why? Simple: Black is not a BYU color. I know the age of “Black for Black’s Sake” uniforms never really went away, as shown by Houston, KU, and a few other alternates in CFB, but it feels especially egregious here. BYU has an absolutely gorgeous color palette, and instead of leading with royal, they made it a secondary color. Plus, why on earth wasn’t the Stretch Y logo royal? The uniform itself is fine, but it just isn’t “BYU.”
University of Houston Cougars (4-8)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/N2AevXy
Number of Combos: 9 Best: White/Blue/White - Oilers Worst: Red/Red/Red
There were glimmers of hope for this Houston team throughout the season, winning games vs UTSA and Sam Houston, grabbing a surprise win against WVU, and winning in OT vs Baylor. Other than those scant few victories, it was a rough one for the Coogs (luckily, basketball is soothing some of those burns).Dana Holgerson continues to be a tough case. We’ll see how they recover next season.
Houston has always struck me as a team that didn’t really mind what they wore from game to game. Most of their combos feel standard, a little plain. They don’t have that much of a logo history to fall on, their color scheme is pretty regular, and usually, their alternate attempts are different varieties of black. That changed this season with the introduction of their Oilers-inspired suits. It’s historical. It looks incredible. The striping and coloration is PERFECT. Their look is a tribute to the rich history of a football-mad city, not a reminder of a franchise leaving a fan base behind. It's a shame the No Fun League issued a cease and desist to Houston for the color scheme (even though Rice also has an Oilers “throwback” that didn’t get in trouble). I really hope these come back. My least favorite look, much like Iowa State, is that all red look. It’s so bold and there’s no break in color. It’s compounded by the monogram logo and odd leg stripes. These uniforms feel like the other side of the BYU combo coin in a lot of ways, with one major color, all very “Houston” like, but without the history or magic of the royal blue. Maybe we’ll see another surprise like the Oilers look next year.
Baylor University Bears (3-9)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/b1ZMIR4
Number of Combos: 9 Best: Yellow/Yellow/Green Worst: Yellow/White/Yellow
The skid continues for Baylor. Two years removed from the Big 12 championship, Baylor does not look good. HC Dave Aranda is 23-25 in his fourth year in Waco, with a wide margin between his best and worst moments. The Bears had wins against Long Island University, Cincinnati and a miraculous comeback versus UCF, which is pretty slim pickings. Coupled with some heartbreaking losses, it wasn't the year to be in the Baylor line. At least the only way forward for the Bears is up. The Bears have a surprising 2024 class but still feel enigmatic.
Last year, Baylor fans consistently echoed a need for variety in their uniforms. The only time an article of yellow clothing was worn in the 2022 season was the all-yellow suits, which is a WILD fact. The whole premise of the 2019 update was interchangeability, and it was finally utilized here. This year was a breath of fresh air. They introduced three new combos, one of which was my favorite for the season. The Yellow/Yellow/Green combo was worn in Week 1 and Week 13 (A perfect beginning and end to the season - uniform wise, that is). They totally flipped the script on combos and made me a very happy uniform tracker. These have the perfect ratio of green to yellow while maintaining a nice simplicity. These are wonderful! My least favorite was also a brand-new combo: The Yellow/White/Yellow. It starred in what looked like a football acid trip on the TV vs TCU’s “Blood Red” threads, and I just don’t really like these. The green collar especially bugs me. I know these uniforms were much anticipated by the fanbase, and I wanted to see them, too, but the timing and the way the format just doesn't match up with this particular combo irks me. Almost every other combo is a win for me. Next year, more variety and logos would be a very welcome addition. After all, there’s 27 possible combos with their current wardrobe, and more when you add alternate helmets and such. This is probably one of the most improved teams uniform-wise in the Big 12.
University of Cincinnati Bearcats(3-9)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/gKXdRQW
Number of Combos: 11 Best: Black/Black/Red Worst: Red/White/White
A rough entry for the Bearcats, in large part due to mediocre QB play from Emory Jones and a rocky first season for HC Scott Satterfield. In the end, it was just poor timing for both realignment and signing a new coach. Facing brand new teams is a tough pill by itself. The Bearcats won their first two non-con games against EKU and Pitt before promptly dropping 7 games in a row. Their sole Big 12 win came against Houston. And hey, just like BU, there’s no other way but up for Cincy.
The Bearcats were the last Big 12 squad to get new uniforms this summer. And yeah, they look pretty plain, but it works for them! It allows for a sleek, versatile look where each piece can be subbed out for another with little fuss. The only problem with that is this: Cincinnati definitely has a signature look. The all-black or black with red accents is the primo Bearcats style. This means that red jerseys and helmets kind of feel odd. Case in point, the worst look. The Red/White/White uniform has such promise. The helmet has some sort of unique paint on it that makes it seem almost velvety. But something about this look just feels wrong to me. I can’t pinpoint it. Anyway, my favorite look from them is the Black/Black/Red from Week 4 vs OU. Man, I guess red is a good pants color. It provides the right punch of color to a uniform without offsetting the balance of it and works great as a secondary color. Both these and KU, same story. Both of them went through the same simplification process this summer. Also, the C-Paw logo being scattered abundantly really helps out, as it’s the most recognizable symbol UC has. It's a good, clean look with the right pop of color. What else can I say? A good job uniform wise for Cincy. Maybe not award-winning, but stylish - if conventional.
Now, let's check out our Four Corners friends, joining in this summer!
University of Arizona Wildcats (10-3)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/m6CGYB5
Number of Combos: 8 Best: White/Blue/White Worst: White/Red/Red
What a surprising year for the Wildcats! After finishing 1-11 just two years ago, the Wildcats ended their season with a victory in their first bowl appearance since 2017 before heading to the Big 12. Their record included some very impressive wins against ranked teams like Washington State, Oregon State, UCLA and Utah. If one possession would have changed, they could have grabbed ranked wins against USC and Washington as well. Arizona was a giant slayer this year. I’m a little scared to see them in the Big 12. Fifita the breakout QB star and a large upperclassmen squad is back for 2023, and I think new hire Brennan can bridge the gap by riding momentum, while adding in some hires like former UNM/ASU (he he) coach Danny Gonzales for support. Bear down!
Arizona’s uniforms are a brilliant revitalization of the uniforms worn in the Dick Tomey era of football. In 1987, Tomey became head coach at Arizona, earning Pac-10 "Coach of the Year" honors in 1992. He coached five future NFL first-round draft picks, 20 All-Americans, and 43 Pac-10 first team players. His teams were highlighted by a tenacious "Desert Swarm" defense, where the uniform name comes from. His 95 school wins is the most in Arizona school history. These particular suits were introduced as alternates in 2019 after the Wildcats experimented from 2012 on with gradients. They were updated full time in 2021 to great applause. It’s timeless! And that goes for each variation of them. For the most part they remain consistent with the mismatched stripes, white “A” helmet, and sleek template. Aside from the stripes on the white uniform not being “mismatched” like the White/Blue/White uniform (my favorite, by the way), I feel great about each uniform worn, except for one. Much like other teams with a red secondary color, the red uniforms are a lot. It’s manageable with just one piece of red, but it feels like a lot even with the striping. Beautiful work still, and unique!
University of Utah Utes (8-5)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/ZEWfa7f
Number of Combos: 10 Best: White/White/White Worst: Black/White/Black
Utah had a bad case of the injury blues. TE Brant Kuithe and tailback Micah Bernard were both tough losses. QB Cam Rising was banged up bad during the 2022 Rose Bowl. The sixth-year senior hoped to return at some point in 2023 but was unable to do so. With a medical redshirt in hand, he has an opportunity to carry Utah to great things. Hopefully the transfer and recruiting trail can help the Utes, though: 4 sophomores and one freshman started on the offensive line in the bowl game. Jackson, the team's leading rusher with 797 yds, entered the transfer portal, as did backup QBs Barnes and Johnson. Three starters will have to be replaced in the secondary. The Utes have talked up some serious game, but they can certainly rise to the challenge. After all, Kyle Whittingham and his entire Utah program boast an 8-5 record in a “down” year. Also, I am VERY excited to see a Big 12 rendition of the Holy War.
I hadn’t done much research on the Ute’s uniforms before this season, and I was very pleasantly surprised. Utah has some of the nicer Under Armour templates I’ve ever seen. Updated in 2017, they go toe-to-toe with many other “updates” from the time period. Mainly, this is due to the no-nonsense and unique striping on the shoulders, the pleasing and easy to work with color scheme, and the easy font. The chest plate gets a little busy with the captain's patch, bowl patch, “UTAH” wordmark, and UA logo, but that's the only real issue I have. My favorite look by far is their all-white throwbacks worn in Week 8 and 11. They draw from various designs, including 1970s-1990s shoulder stripes, the interlocking UU logo from the 1960s, and - my favorite touch - the unique font from the 1970s. These are incredibly sexy. Other standouts are the home throwbacks worn in Week 4, the Ute Proud suits from Week 7, and their all blacks worn against ASU. But their home suits are excellent as well! I would put their Red/White/Red standard right at 4th on the season. The Black/White/Black suit just didn’t tickle my fancy. I think the gray stands out in it, which feels a little disjointed. But it’s still a pretty great suit. Damn good work from Utah. Keep an eye out for them in the Uniform Awards.
University of Colorado Buffaloes (4-8)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/7SCSU5A
Number of Combos: 12 Best: White/White/White Worst: Black/White/Gold
Coach Prime dragged his team to the finish line, ending with a final record of 4-8. The Buffaloes went 1-8 in Pac-12 play and ended the season with six consecutive losses. While it was a tough way to end Colorado's Pac-12 time, the finale at least provided some positives. Two-way star Travis Hunter has solidified himself as a great talent, the Sanders brothers will go back in action next year (assuming there aren’t too many fashion shows during the football season), and RB Dylan Edwards had a few grand slam runs that could lead to even more growth. They have a season under their belt and undeniable hype building for their Big 12 return. I’m excited to have K-State play against them this year!
Similar to TTU, I found myself anxious for the next rendition of CU’s uniforms that Deion said would come in 2024. They still wore some heaters, especially the Gold/Black/Gold (TBT the 1990 Colorado squad) and my favorite look, the all-white smoke show from Week 1. What is there to say? This is the perfect mix of gold leaf and black. The all-white field against TCU’s purple is gorgeous. I think this combo has the best flow in the line-up. My issue with CU’s uniforms this season stems from a lack of standardization. It felt like there were lots of uniforms from various years being thrown around. We know Coach Prime wants to add bling with the gold leaf/chrome, but it felt jarring throwing in a new helmet to a clearly older design sometimes. Look through the album to see what I’m talking about. My least favorite is the Black/White/Gold worn in Week 13. Tri-colors don’t do it for me. The different shades of gold make this feel way too jumbled. Which is your favorite?
Arizona State University Sun Devils (3-9)
Season Gallery Link: https://imgur.com/a/eXCLv20
Number of Combos: 12 Best: Yellow/Maroon/Yellow - Sparky Worst: Maroon/Black/Black
ASU had one non-con win and 2 PAC-12 wins. But they were still an enjoyable team to watch! There were 3 incredibly close losses where Arizona State looked like a team that could blow things up! I’m excited to see where first year HC Kenny Dillingham takes the program, and they have some very fun games versus Texas State and Wyoming in 2024’s non-con, and - selfishly - I am very excited to see them against the Wildcats. Lots to do in the offseason and a tough schedule ahead make for a busy Sun Devil crew. Watch out for sunburn, Big 12 bros!
What a stylish season for ASU. For the first time in 5 years, ASU had a white helmet option to go along with the gold and maroon. My least favorite suit was a product of the ASU’s earlier uniform refresh worn in Week 2 against Oklahoma State. It’s an older suit, has that knit sweater look (which some people love, but I don’t). The color scheme would have looked great using the new suits. I do like the Arizona Flag design on the chest though, it’s one of the things I missed about the new template. Speaking of the new template, it’s a sleeker design. They removed the large subliminal flag on the chest, most of the striping, and much of the other chest clutter. They added a large pitchfork on the leg (a move I go back and forth on), but the whole refresh seemed to have “simplify” in mind. Which works great! ASU is known best for its color scheme. That’s why my favorite suit works so well. Yellow/Maroon/Yellow, sparky on the lid. A great color combo that really just feels like the Sun Devils. The simplified uniform really does great. My second pick has to be the White/White/White, utilizing the sweet new white shell, and my third pick is probably between the White/White/Maroon suit worn in Week 5 and their “Ghost Story” uniform from Week 9. The black/yellow and white all combine for a fantastic alternative. Not very valuable as an every-day wear, but a nice suit for special occasions. The black pitchfork looks exemplary, and you can really see the Arizona flag on the side of these.
Well, everyone! That’s it! I can’t believe the 2023 season is over. 18 damn teams’ seasons and uniforms reviewed. I hope you had as much fun as I did! I want to thank u/CockADoodleBOOM and u/holytrolly_ for providing me inspiration. I appreciate the opportunity to continue the tracker, and I'm excited to again next year! Over the offseason, I’ll post a team specific uniform ranking, as well my “2023 Uniform Awards” sometime soon. If you have any questions about the tracker or a team, feel free to PM or comment, and leave an upvote! I appreciate every single one of you, from the constant commenters to the casual lurkers. Until next season, in America’s most exciting football conference!
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2024.01.13 17:21 matte_purple 2023 Postseason Big 12 Uniform Tracker: The Gang goes to Arlington and has a Wild Bowl Season!

Hello CFB! Welcome to the 2023 Big XII Uniform Tracker in the Post Season! Wow, what a week for conference championships. On this edition of the tracker, I’ll go over the OSU vs Texas game’s looks, and also go over the bowl games before I jump into a season review and then (my favorite part: the uniform awards!) Nine of our current Big XII schools headed to a bowl, and two of the future additions from the Four Corners also notched at least 6 wins to go to a bowl. Some of them were less than exciting, others were a real treat, and all of them put on a good show uniform-wise. Let's get moving! I hope you enjoy this version of the tracker!
I’m u/matte_purple, and let's 3,2,1 go!
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#7 University of Texas Longhorns vs #18 Oklahoma State Cowboys (Texas Wins, 49-21)
OSU: Black/Black/Black (Link: https://imgur.com/a/lW5gF3X )
UT: White/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/posRfDv )
Three-touchdown days are good. A three-touchdown first quarter is incredible. Texas looked lights out in the first quarter, with Longhorns star QB Quinn Ewers spiraling a perfect 11-11 passes for 167 yds and 3 scores in the first quarter alone. He threw for another TD in the second half and totalled 452 yds at the final whistle. My favorite pass was to 362-pound defensive tackle T’Vondre Sweat who pulled the Heisman pose after the catch. And the Longhorn defense really showed their mettle. Normally game-changing Cowboy RB Ollie Gordon II carried the ball 13 times for 34 yards. He averaged a paltry 2.6 yards per carry as OSU’s offensive line struggled against a salty UT defense. The Oklahoma State pass game was a tad better. QB Alan Bowman was 22-38 passing for 250 yds with two of his three touchdowns going to WR Rashod Owens. Also, it was announced after their bowl that Alan Bowman qualifies for a SEVENTH YEAR of eligibility for the Cowboys. Damn. Anyway, at the end of the day, Texas just straight up outmatched Oklahoma State. Congrats on Texas on their first Big 12 Championship since 2009, and despite a loss in the CFP, it was still a nice swan-song, in the end. I will genuinely miss having Texas in the Big 12. Best of luck in the SEC! Anyways, onto the uniforms.
Oklahoma State wore an all-black look to contrast to the Texas all-whites. And while I like the contrast as a whole, I was kind of hoping for more orange from the Cowboys. Plus, this look was worn against Kansas State back in Week 6. On top of that, they wore the same helmet and jersey while only swapping in orange pants in Week 10. I think an Orange/Black/Orange would have rocked the house. Also, I’m a little burnt out on the Cursive Cowboy’s logo as a whole. It was worn in 4 of the past 5 games and 8 times total this season. I don’t think it would matter as much if it was spread out. I did some digging, and this is actually the first time we’ve seen a repeat uniform in their season since 2019, when they wore all-white with the standard brand twice in a season. But aside from me being slightly annoyed with a repeat and the Cursive Cowboys logo, this is an excellent look. The all black is really something to behold on this new template. I’m so excited to see more possibilities next year and to cover what they did different in the bowl game a tad later.
Texas, obviously, wore their standard. They updated them slightly in 2022, but they have remained virtually the same since Texas started athletics. They have always looked good, and honestly, always will. I love the “TEXAS” on the front, instead of “Longhorns.” The feature was first added in 1959, and made a reappearance in 1983, with it appearing on the front ever since.
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As promised, let's recap and check out the uniforms for each bowl game!
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Sugar Bowl: #3 University of Texas Longhorns vs #2 University of Washington Huskies (UW Wins, 37-31)
Texas: White/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/Y9Xix1k )
UW: Gold/Purple/Purple (Link: https://imgur.com/a/DvfC3Cr )
A crusher for the Longhorns. After what appeared to be a no-sweat win versus Oklahoma State at the start of the month, Texas had a monstrous task: beat the UW squad with fate at their back and PAC-12 pride fueling their play. The matchup was electric. Star Husky QB Michael Penix, Jr. went 29-38 with no turnovers. He completed 12 straight at one point, the longest on-target streak in the CFP’s 10-year history. No. 3 Texas had four chances in the red zone after getting to the Washington 12 with 15 seconds left, but UT QB Quinn Ewers missed on the last three passes. The final throw was knocked away by Washington's CB Elijah Jackson, officially dashing the dream. Washington didn’t allow a single sack to the vaunted Texas defensive line and managed to find a passing attack that put the Huskies over the top. Great game, Texas. Better luck next time, and an honest hats off to you.
Funny enough, Texas played Washington in the Alamo Bowl last year, and it looks like both programs really found their groove this season! The combo decision was a pretty easy one for the Longhorns. As we’ve covered their Stormtroopers already, we’ll move on. (The only thing different was that Sugar Bowl patch and updated “diamond-esque” Nike symbol. With Washington, though, there’s a few more options. They’ve worn the standard Gold/Purple/Gold combo 5 times this season, swapping in purple pants thrice (including both the PAC-12 Champ game) and wore their “Husky Royalty” uniforms in Week 8 versus Arizona State. They wore Gold/Purple/Purple in last year’s bowl game, too, although with chrome instead of the flat gold look seen here. I understand the importance for the UW brand and desire to wear these, but as a uniform snob I was really hoping for the new “Royalty” (Chrome Purple/Purple/Purple) uniforms for some good luck and a great contrast. It would have looked so great against the all-white from Texas. Oh well, c’est la vie. Both teams looked great.
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Alamo Bowl: #14 University of Arizona Wildcats vs #12 University of Oklahoma Sooners (Arizona Wins, 38-24)
Arizona: White/White/Blue (Link: https://imgur.com/a/vG3FTU6 )
OU: Red/Red/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/Qg2xJK1 )
After finishing 1-11 just two years ago, the Wildcats ended their season with a victory in their first bowl appearance since 2017 before heading to the Big 12. Now, there were a lot of factors in this game. Arizona is very obviously a good team, and so is OU. But OU head coach Brent Venables said it best during the post game: “... you’re not going to win when you lose the turnover margin 6-1.” Wildcat safety Gunner Maldonado returned two fumbles (one that went 87 yds for a TD) AND had an INT. Oklahoma’s backup QB Jackson Arnold’s second pass of the game was intercepted by freshman safety Genesis Smith, the first intercept of his career. DB Martell Irby had his only INT of the season, and an additional fumble was recovered by big DL Jacob Kongaika, who also notched two sacks in his sophomore season. OU’s Jackson Arnold (a freshman in his first college showing) showed a lot of grit, and even recorded a respectable 361 yds and a long strike of 63 yds. But most importantly, he showed his lack of playing time. He certainly has a bright future, but the game went to the newcomers this time around.
Both of these teams went traditional. While it was possible to see the “Unity” or “Rough Rider” alternates, I figured OU would go with the tried and true. These uniforms have stayed largely consistent dating all the way back to the 1940s (with a few switchups that were short lived). They have been nearly identical through the 2000s. Arizona also has a limited number of options. Arizona has worn these white “A” lids in virtually every game since 2020, with a red alternate being the exception). They have worn these all-white “Desert Swarm-esque” suits 3 times this season, all in big games (at USC, at ASU, and vs OU). I’m not sure if they were originally intended to have that big gravity behind them, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. I sure do wish they had the mismatched stripes on the shoulders like the helmet and pants, but that's my only real gripe. Not much else to say about these except they are straight shooters with no frills.
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Pop-Tart Bowl: #25 Kansas State University Wildcats vs #18 NC State University Wolfpack (K-State Wins, 28-19)
K-State: SilvePurple/Silver (Link: https://imgur.com/a/75c80AG )
NC State: White/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/s0ebIFD )
This was one of the more watched games from the bowl season, and it wasn’t all because of Strawberry the Pop-Tart’s ritualistic self-sacrifice, as fun as that was. The game had a lot of storylines. How will K-State’s new QB and OC do? Will NC State find the mythic 10-win season? Will the football game settle the battle between the best two university creameries in the nation? Anyway, onto the game. Kansas State RB DJ Giddens had a 37-yard TD reception in the first quarter and a 4-yard TD run early in the second that made it 14-0. The Wolfpack rallied in the third quarter thanks in large part to a masterful fake punt (TE Trent Pennix ran for a 60-yd score on said fake with 1:50 left in the 3rd). It’s worth mentioning that the fake wasn’t the only one of the game, as the Wildcat’s punter Jack Blumer stormed for 30-yds on a 4th and 5 to set up DJ’s second quarter score. (K-State was perfect on all 4 4th down conversions) But the real star of the show (and the Pop-Tart Bowl MVP) was freshman QB Avery Johnson. The Wichita Kid threw for two TDs and ran for one, threw for 178 yds, rushed for 71, and notched a 98.1 QBR. Johnson, affectionately called “Sunshine” by both fans and teammates, was a nightmare to tackle, and set up a solid foundation for next season. NC State QB Brennan Armstrong also looked great, rushing for 121 yards on 17 carries and one TD to extend his record to 665 single-season rushing yards by a quarterback. Both teams ended with a 9-4 record, but only one got to eat some tasty Pop-Tarts in the locker room.
K-State wore their standard look brought forth by Bill Snyder. Although their Nike contract has been renewed, I’d imagine the Wildcats still won’t bring out too many alternates. There have only been 4 alternates recorded in the Chris Kleiman era, but as you know, I want some spice! NC State just got new threads this summer, and they look GREAT. I especially love the sublimated North Carolina seal on the side (you should be able to see it in the image linked). I’m not huge on the “Wolfpack” on the side, but it works well. Mostly, I’m just glad the horrible shoulder pattern from the last few years is dead and buried. I don’t think red pants would have been a bad thing, but it's a small complaint. The all white is crisp, contrasts well against the purple/silver, and who doesn't love that incredible Tuffy logo up top.
​
Texas Bowl: #20 Oklahoma State University Cowboys vs Texas A&M Aggies (OK-State Wins, 31-23)
TAMU: Maroon/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/VNi513m )
OSU: Black/White/Black (Link: https://imgur.com/a/U4jcfHe )
The Cowboys held off an impressive comeback attempt by the A&M Aggies to close out the Texas Bowl. The real stinger? The Aggies lost their starting QB, Jayden Henderson, on the first snap of the game to a rough-looking arm injury. Their backup - Marcel Reed, the freshman from Nashville - still had a wild night, including some incredible throws and a great stat line (20-33 attempts and 361 yds and a 20 yd TD run). The game included a pretty hectic 4th quarter, highlighted by a punch-out ball recovered by the Pokes at the 1-yd line. From there, it was keep-away for the Stillwater posse. Doak Walker award winning RB Ollie Gordon II danced his way through the 100-yd mark in the game and the 1,700-yd mark for the season, an achievement only reached by 6 other Cowboy RBs (including Chuba Hubbard, Thurman Thomas, and, of course, the great Barry Sanders). He also tied for 4th in the school’s season rushing TDs in a season. QB Alan Bowman had a game with his best yards of the season at 402 yds, completing 34-49 attempts, 2 TDs and 2 INTs. One of my favorites was a gorgeous pass to WR Rashod Owens (who killed it all night in the highlights) in the back corner right before the 2nd quarter. A wild end to a hectic season for both teams.
Okay, so the Aggies have gone the way of most SEC teams, cut out the excess, and stuck to the basics. It seems like the weirder concepts they've tried in 2011, 2012, 2015, and 2017 have fallen to the wayside, as the standard maroon and white look has been used almost exclusively since 2020. And like I said, the only real design choices here are the font and the name on the front, plus the one unique logo on the pants that incorporate the state outline (more of that!). It's simplified and clean, but they let the brand do the talking! OK-State has become the kings of combos in the past decade, ever since their 2011 and 2016 revamps. This look ranked 6th in my OK-State rankings last year, but the 2023 revamped threads are the best update yet. The throwback shoulder stripes complement the helmet wonderfully, the block numbers help simplify things, while the main “Oklahoma State” name on the chest retains the fun “barbed wire” font from the past renditions. The symmetry is there, the brand-new Captains Badge (very reminiscent of the old badge logo) center chest looks unique AND sexy, while the Cursive Cowboys helmet continues to be one of the greatest alternates in CFB today. These ones are going to be tough to rank against some of the other combos we’ve seen. And yeah, like I said with OSU vs Texas, I don’t want the Cursive Cowboys look to become overused, but I can still concede how damn good it is.
​
Liberty Bowl: Iowa State University Cyclones vs University of Memphis Tigers (Memphis Wins, 36-26)
ISU: Red/Red/Red (Link: https://imgur.com/a/KF5tb2u )
Memphis: White/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/yxdEtJw )
Now, I can sympathize with Iowa State here. Last time my beloved Wildcats went there, they lost to Navy in an embarrassing fashion. But that time, it wasn’t against Memphis’ home team.
The Memphis Tigers generally run out of the tunnel at Simmons Bank Liberty Stadium for roughly half of their football games, but for only the second time ever, they played in the Liberty Bowl. And for the first time ever, they won. Memphis scored 19 unanswered points in the first quarter to start the game. The Cyclones staged a comeback, grabbing 13 unanswered points, but the Tigers continued to press the offense. Their D-line badgered ISU all game with two sacks, eight tackles for loss, and three QB hurries on the box score. And that's just what showed up on the stat sheet. The whole game felt like Memphis pushing the Ames boys around. Iowa State finished with zero rushing yards, and RB Abu Sama only netted four yards on 12 attempts. Overall it was just a rough game for the Cyclones. But hey, even after a bowl loss, with six winning seasons in seven years, ISU with Campbell is in its best years since the 1910s.
The all-red look is super aggressive. And I’ll be honest, it’s probably my least favorite Iowa State look. ISU looks best (in my opinion) when you get to break it up with a white helmet or white pants. Last year I was very critical of the font style and how it “swirls” like a windstorm. But the more I cover and look at a growing trend of block numbers or adding a notch ala TCU or Baylor for a unique touch, the more appealing these get. The “lightning bolt” stripe on the cuff is a little odd, but the thing I want most is a new logo up top. The AMES helmet is legendary. Adding something like that to a red helmet, or better yet just wearing that white helmet with a red facemask, or Walking Cy, or several other renditions on a lid would be so much better than the Block I. Maybe next year.
I’ve covered Memphis before, more when Houston and UCF were still outside the Big 12. My same thoughts apply. These particular Tiger Stripe helmets are neat, and they've been worn once a year since 2021. They look good, and the designs on top allow for a kind of trickle down effect that makes the rest of the uniform look more designed than it really is (coupled with the shoulder stripes). As far as I’m aware, these suits were officially released in 2017, and they have gone through a variety of colors. Blue and White, Black and Blue, White and Black, Gray and White, it's pretty neat seeing the mileage that can come out of just a few stripes. This combo was one of the more “plain” looks they offer, but it's still cool looking and obviously makes the team feel good!
​
Guaranteed Rate Bowl: University of Kansas Jayhawks vs University of Nevada - Las Vegas Rebels (KU Wins, 49-36)
KU: Blue/White/Blue (Link: https://imgur.com/a/Q4Fo9hj )
UNLV: Gray/Red/Gray (Link: https://imgur.com/a/PKLh4bU )
Alright, I’ve got to get two things out of the way before I say anything else. First, congrats KU on their first bowl win since 2008! It’s a big deal, and Lance Liepold and Co. are clearly turning things around. Good work. Second, what the $#@& was up with the flags? I’m pretty sure I just got an unsportsmanlike conduct just for writing that out! Kansas was flagged 18 times for 210 yards, including four personal fouls. I’m not sure what the record was, but it was almost comical watching the yellow flags launch on what felt like an every play basis. KU’s havoc-wrecking offense - thankfully - overcame the referees. Jayhawk QB Jason Bean threw for 449 yds and all six of his touchdown passes were caught by two receivers (Lawrence Arnold and Luke Grimm - which are just bad ass names). KU ended up sending 5 separate rushers out, totalling 142 yds and bringing the offensive total to a whopping 591. In the end, the UNLV Rebels couldn’t capitalize on plenty of opportunities, despite QB Jayden Maiava throwing two TD passes in the third quarter to rally UNLV nearly all the way back from a 21-point deficit early in the second. Good work to the Jayhawks!
UNLV has such promise uniform wise. I like their catalog, which was updated in 2020, especially their use of anthracite/gray. It’s something that went out-of-style starting in 2015-ish. I know it’s a main part of their color scheme, but it’s still refreshing. But the catch is, the shades seem varied between the helmet, the pants, and the details. Some of that is lighting (in better lit games they look much similar) but the main issue is the shade of collar. I think if you get that consistent, you're golden. The arching UNLV is a fairly sharp logo, and the helmet is actually new (worn in 3 games this year including this one). Although, I really wish they would have found a way to retool their mascot/logo (that pioneer with the big bushy mustache) instead of it being permanently retired in 2021. I always liked that logo, especially the 1983-1996 version, and saw it on other helmets. But hey, I get the sentiment. Anyways, let's move on.
Kansas has looked great this season, especially in their debut duds from this summer. I love the symmetry of these suits, and I am so very happy the old Trajan “KU” wordmark was not used a single time this year. It was the Jayhawk all the way on every helmet this season. The white facemask helps tie the helmet to the jersey, but I think I actually like it more with the blue facemask seen against Texas. Regardless, the refresh has really done wonders for these suits. Very clean, very streamlined, nice non-Trajan font and fresh shoulder pads. Maybe not as good as the all-whites, but still incredible.
​
Mayo Bowl: West Virginia University Mountaineers vs University of North Carolina Tar Heels (WVU Wins, 30-10)
WVU: Blue/Yellow/Blue (Link: https://imgur.com/a/gwvMSci )
UNC: White/White/Blue (Link: https://imgur.com/a/Ldfrh3p )
West Virginia’s Garret Greene fired a 75-yd pass for a score on the game's opening play and never looked back. The Mountaineer’s tore it up, with QB Greene completing 12-23 passes for 228 yds and added 64 rushing yds on the ground to help the Mountaineers to 392 total offensive yards. Unsurprising for this squad, the story was more centered on the defense, who pitched a UNC shutout in the second half, sacked QB Conner Harrell seven times and picked off his passes twice. I’ll say this, it’s no living Pop-Tart sacrifice at the end of the game, but the mayo bath was pretty satisfying, especially considering Neal Brown and his squad - at 9-4 after the game - were generally picked last place in Big 12 preseason polls. He has what he needs to really kill it next season.
My Lord, WVU. These uniforms. They are something else. I think I still like the away version of these “Cue Country Roads” uniforms a tad more, but WOW these are gorgeous. The sublimated road map, the incredible state outline logo with the Flying WV on the inside, the consistent striping on the helmet and pants, all topped off by the “Mountaineers” on the chest. This isn’t as retro as, say, the new OK-State suits or Texas Tech throwbacks, but they aren’t meant to be. They give off a touch of modernity and provide that link to how relevant the university is to the state. I’ve always heard it said “West Virginia has a pro team, it's the Mountaineers” just because of how important they are in the state. These uniforms are a great reflection of that. This may be my favorite bowl matchup of the season!
UNC was a great pairing for the darker yellow and blue from their opponent. The white and light blue mixed with the genteel argyle patterning really made this matchup pop. I’ve always liked that pattern, as it is wholly unique. Why argyle in the first place? Former UNC coach Dean Smith (of the Men’s Basketball program) called up UNC alum and award-winning fashion designer Alexander Julian for some help in designing a new 1991 basketball look. After getting the right blue hue down, Julian took inspiration from one of his favorite articles of clothing - his lucky argyle sweater that won him his first prestigious Coty American Fashion Award. To help make the final choice, Julian spoke to Michael Jordan, the former UNC star who had already risen through the NBA ranks. He liked it. And the rest was history. The next year, argyle alternates for other sports began to show up for the Tar Heels. It's an incredible touch, and only adds to the magnificent uniform matchup that this game was.
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Independence Bowl: Texas Tech University Red Raiders vs University of California Berkeley Golden Bears (Tech Wins, 34-14)
TTU: Black/Red/Red (Link: https://imgur.com/a/n1peaEQ )
Cal: Blue/White/Yellow (Link: https://imgur.com/a/5USOSaX )
Cal’s QB Fernando Mendoza struck hard against the Red Raiders, and on the first play, but turned the ball over four times - three interceptions and one fumble. Cal RB Jaydn Ott was bullied by Tech’s D-Line all throughout the night, only running for 45 yds and 1 TD, his 2nd lowest yardage of the season. Texas Tech made very few mistakes, with just 5 punts, one missed FG and a pair of turnovers. Helpfully, it seemed that Tech QB Behren “The Red Behren” Morton had one of his more complete games, throwing for 256 yds and 3 TDs. Capping off a nice bowl win, the Red Raiders also got word that RB Taj Brooks - who has the 4th most rushing yds in the FBS - is coming back for another year. Merry Christmas to that!
Texas Tech wore a slightly modified version of their every day suit. They wore mostly Black/Red/Black this season - specifically 3 times this season. This time they swapped in red pants opting for a more aggressive look. I think I prefer the B/B combo over this one, just based on symmetry, but there’s so so many nit-picky details about these uniforms that I just don’t like. The inconsistent stripes. The slightly different shades of red throughout the uniform. The two-tone chevron shoulder pattern. I’m really excited to see the new suits they bring out next season. They’ll supposedly be the first Adidas uniforms graced with Patrick Mahomes brand. I’m also disappointed we didn’t see any more throwback looks from the Red Raiders this year, despite the “curse” associated with them. Overall, I’m ready for the next step!
As for Cal, they wore their mismatched look updated in 2017. The Golden Bears have a template that reminds me of Utah, despite being different providers. I like the little gray accent colors scattered throughout. The numbers are maybe a tad on the skinny side. Mostly, I like Cal’s blue monochrome home uniforms over their away uniforms. I also have a disdain for tri-color uniforms, and much prefer a two-tone (especially if it’s symmetrical). But, these still looked nice, and ended up being a good TV matchup.
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Gasparilla Bowl: University of Central Florida Knights vs Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets (GT Wins, 30-17)
UCF: Gold/Black/Black (Link: https://imgur.com/a/PIDJ7vC )
GT: White/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/Uxn89ze )
UCF got out to a quick start, taking advantage of some long kickoff returns, throwing some impressive TD passes, storming into the second quarter with a 14-0 lead. Then the Knights fumbled, and the GT Yellow Jackets picked up the momentum. Georgia Tech RB Jamal Haynes was a monster on the field, burning up 128 yards on 18 rushes to help Georgia Tech to its first winning season since 2018. He became the Yellow Jackets' first 1,000-yard runner since 2017. Late in the 4th quarter, QB Timmy McClain subbed in for John Rhys Plumlee, who completed 16-29 passes for 198 yds and two TDs. The game did feature one of the wilder interceptions I’ve ever seen, courtesy of UCF DB Demari Henderson, his 3rd of the season. Sadly, UCF will have to replace Plumlee but did get a nice Christmas gift when RJHarvey decided to announce his return for his fifth season next year. This was Harvey's seventh 100-yard game of the season. He picked up 120 yards on 15 carries and looked really solid all season.
I love how Georgia Tech has leaned into the gold leaf. There’s some of that shiny gold on every piece of the uniform and I’m a sucker for it. UCF had a “Lightmode'' uniform this year, and I feel like these GT uniforms are a far better version. I’m not thrilled about the shoulder stripes being different from all of the other striping on the helmet/pants, but we can’t always get what we want. The Knights wore what looks to be a regular Gold/Black/Black combo, but it’s actually the first time they wore the suit this season, and only twice last season (Week 2 and 4 in 2022). They wore the same combo in Week 1, but it was a different helmet (gold UCF logo, not white) and different jersey (“Knightmode” unis introduced last year). I like the combo quite a bit, and I’d put it at least in the top half of their season’s uniforms.
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Las Vegas Bowl: University of Utah Utes vs Northwestern University Wildcats (NU Wins, 14-7)
Northwestern: Purple/Purple/Purple (Link: https://imgur.com/a/6Re4ku0 )
Utah: Red/White/Red (Link: https://imgur.com/a/0u9lU0F )
In a game with 3 total scores, the talk naturally falls to the defense and the lacking offense from both sides. QB Bryson Barnes, who stepped in after star QB Cam Rising was injured last season, was battered all game. While he fully inherited the starting role this season, his showing during the Las Vegas bowl was subpar. He completed just 8-13 passes for 55 yds and threw two first-half INTs. At halftime, he had thrown for only 10 yds. He also had negative 2 rushing yds on 16 carries as the Wildcats sacked him five times. Utah was down several key players due to the draft and portal, such as safeties Sione Vaki and Cole Bishop, who both declared for the NFL. Northwestern’s QB Ben Bryant was far more successful, notching 222 yds on 23-34 attempts with 2 TDs, both . The game had 14 total punts, 5 turnover on downs, 2 INTs, one fumble, and only 3 TDs, as mentioned before. But Coach David Braun’s squad improved to 8-5 with a bowl victory in his first year as the Wildcats' coach after the team went 1-11 in 2022. A disappointing game and season for the Utes, who were plagued by injuries all season. They look to get back on their feet before officially joining Big 12 play next season.
Onto the uniforms, Utah has some of the nicer Under Armour templates I’ve ever seen. Updated in 2017, they go toe-to-toe with many other “updates” from the time period. Mainly, this is due to the no-nonsense and unique striping on the shoulders, the pleasing and easy to work with color scheme, and the easy font. The chest plate gets a little busy with the captain's patch, bowl patch, “UTAH” wordmark, and UA logo, but that's the only real issue I have. I much prefer their throwbacks worn in Week 8 and Week 11, but this particular standard combo really pops. I think Utah tends to add enough black to their suits to break up the aggressive color scheme. It’s a clean and identifiable uniform combo that they wore only one other time this year, in Week 2. Northwestern, though, wore monochrome purple suits. To be fair to the Wildcats, I generally like what they do uniforms-wise. Their threads were updated in the summer of 2022 and harken back to a classic 1909 NU look with striping (aptly called “Northwestern stripes”) from the 1928 team. I think I would have liked this look a lot better with white pants to break up the big block of color. I especially like the Script Northwestern helmets worn for the occasion, with the white shell variety worn in Week 9. Pretty clean, if just okay otherwise. That goes for both suits.
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Aaaaand that’s all folks! The post season is all finished up! It has been a real honor tracking uniforms for you this year! What do you hope your team wears next year? What place would you rank these uniforms in your team’s season? I hope you enjoy yourselves this week, can’t wait to see you next time! If you liked this post, have anything additional to add/suggest, leave an upvote, comment, or message me! I love digging through my records and old archive photos. I’ll see you soon to go over the season’s uniforms as a whole for each team, and later we’ll get to the uniform awards, one of my favorite posts! Finally, after that, I’ll make posts ranking every Big 12 team’s uniforms, like I did with a few teams in the 2022 season. I hope ya’ll enjoyed, have a great weekend!
submitted by matte_purple to CFB [link] [comments]

2024.01.01 21:01 All3n911 All the Assassin's Creed games I've played (best to worst)

Before starting this I just want to preface that DLC will not be included in this ranking, I'm judging purely by the base games. With that being said here is my list:
[1] Assassin's Creed 2 Nostalgia definitely helps this game get the number one spot, as this was one of the first games and protagonists that I truly understood and fell in love with. This hands down is the peak of AC's story. Seeing Ezio from a baby, to an aggressive young man seeking revenge, to then a few years later being a cold-blooded killer with morals is an amazing character arc. I loved how many locations there are and how they were all unique in their own way, the templar Lairs were at their peak in this game, the soundtrack is one of my favourites of all time, doing all the subject 16 puzzles and finishing the video was satisfying and the combat while being simplistic was still enjoyable.
[2] Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag AC4 was the most well-rounded AC game. It had excellent gameplay with the addition of naval combat, the exploration was AC's peak, Edward's character arc was some of AC's best storytelling, it had memorable characters, hunting sea creatures and upgrading your ship was fun. The graphics could've been better but other than that I have no complaints about this game.
[3] Assassin's Creed: Revelations This to me was the perfect ending to Ezio's story. Seeing Ezio's changed personality as an older man and his new ideals was interesting to witness, the Altäir segments were great and gave us more insight into his life, the hook blade was cool, I liked Ezio and Sofia's relationship, den defence is fun and Istanbul felt like a breath of fresh air. The main antagonist wasn't the most memorable but I still thought the story was good. The worst thing about this game was the DLC that shall not be named.
[4] Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood The greatest thing about Brotherhood in my opinion are the side missions. Leonardo's machines, the Cristina missions, Templar lairs, Lairs of Romulus, Borgia towers this game was packed with things to do. I also liked how they did Rome (Despite there being a little too much open land). I loved the inclusion of assassin recruits (and how you could send them on missions), it completely changed how I approach combat. The story was decent and had some of the greatest moments in AC history, but it also at times felt like a long dlc for AC2 and the dialogue wasn't as rich as the other two games in the trilogy. I also felt the ending for the main story was rushed which let it down a bit. In my opinion the weakest out of the Ezio trilogy but still an amazing game.
[5] Assassin's Creed: Unity The story on this game was kind of forgettable. Arno started off well displaying similar charisma to what Ezio had but ultimately the storyline and characters fell flat the more the game progressed. What makes Unity truly shine though is the gameplay. To this day I think Unity has the best parkour, possibly the best AC combat, gorgeous graphics and I enjoyed exploring France during the french revolution.
[6] Assassin's Creed The first installment in this franchise is still good. A lot of the graphics haven't aged amazingly but the story still holds up well, Altäir is likeable and mysterious and does a good job of building intrigue for the next games in the series.
[7] Assassin's Creed Rogue A lot of this felt like Black Flag 2.0 so it loses points for unoriginality. But despite that the story was unique for putting you in the perspective of a Templar and the gameplay was still enjoyable.
[8] Assassin's Creed 3 The gameplay in AC3 was decent. Even though it had its moments I wasn't a massive fan of the story and how Desmond's arc ended, and unpopular opinion but Conor was one of my least favourite protagonists.
[9] Assassin's Creed: Syndicate I'm not going to lie I only got through about 5 hours of this game and decided to abandon it. I didn't like how the parkour felt, the skill tree didn't anything too game-changing apart from the grappling hook and the protagonists weren't awful but they did feel bland at times. The combat was okay and I did like London.
submitted by All3n911 to assassinscreed [link] [comments]

2023.12.23 18:03 FFBot Official: [WDIS RB] - Sat Afternoon 12/23/2023

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2023.12.10 03:52 Icecapsmelting [Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood] #325 Great game but I preferred hunting down feathers in AC II over the Borgia flags

[Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood] #325 Great game but I preferred hunting down feathers in AC II over the Borgia flags submitted by Icecapsmelting to Trophies [link] [comments]

2023.12.02 22:27 ChannelAb3 THE POLZEIG EXPERIENCE Part two

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Despite my aches and pains, I had no problem sleeping that night. There were dreams again, but this time they were vivid and memorable. They were filled with distorted images of a grand staircase descending into the unknown, walls bending inward, and open doors leading to revealed nothing but shadows. But one hallway drew me in, its yellow curtains swaying lazily. With each step further down the hall, the curtains moved and rippled more, and I began to hear a humming that came from either behind the veil of fabric or perhaps the fabric itself. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch the curtains; the material was damp and warm to the touch. Strange yet familiar symbols flitted out from where my fingers had brushed the fabric. The static music rose up, filling my mind with names from the lost cards of the Old Deck - Zyvrathul, Grythar, Vyraska, Astrylith.
Finally, inevitably, the hallway brought me to a dead-end alcove. That was where Marvin was waiting for me. He sat at a table with a revolver in his hand.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Waiting for you,” he answered.
“Why did you do it?”
He placed the revolver to his head, “Because I won.”
Mercifully, I woke up before he pulled the trigger.
At around ten in the morning, an Attendant delivered me a paper plate covered with warm Eggo waffles and a cup of tepid water. When I asked for seconds of both, they happily brought them to me. Six hours later, I was brought a thermos of coffee, a bag lunch containing a sandwich, and an apple. I asked if there was anything to read, and they brought me Volume 71 of Reader’s Digest condensed books. It was all I needed to pass the time until sunset.
I was almost finished with the first book in the volume when the Attendant came to fetch me. This time when I entered the Yellow Tent, I was given a square of paper and a miniature pencil. One side of the paper was a tally of my baccarat winnings, the other was blank. I ended up standing in line next to the Self-Made Millionaire. “All this… nonsense,” he said. “The Old Deck is in the hands of a lunatic.”
“What’s left of the Old Deck, you mean,” someone else commented.
I kept my silence; there were Attendants everywhere, and I knew one of them must have heard. Let someone else find visitors in their trailer tonight.
And besides, in all my studies about the Old Deck, I’d never heard of a single innocent or rational soul having it in their possession. The previous owner of the Old Deck had been a ruthless harridan who made her fortune in real estate and was supposedly secretly involved in the death of Evelyn McHale and the establishment of the National Prayer Breakfast.
It was open seating in the Yellow Tent. I chose the third row of the right corner and settled in, the pencil and paper resting on one knee. This time the suit depicted hanging over the stage depicted two symbolic figures intertwined in an otherworldly dance. This was the ninth card of the Old Deck, the sign of the Tearer of Realms.
The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped onto the stage and instructed us that we would be given three minutes to make our choice, and then the slips of paper and pencils would be collected. She further explained that we could either bet nothing at all, all our winnings, or Wager for the Deck. We were also instructed to mark down our competitor of choice as clearly as possible. Then she clapped her hands twice, and six of the Attendants filed out onto the stage, each wearing a medallion with a number around their chest.
I thought of the Owner of a Regional Supermarket Chain and the other losers from last night, their fortunes lost and their futures uncertain. I imagined them traveling home, both disappointed and relieved to have been spared this choice.
Nothing at all. All my winnings. Wager for the Deck.
What would the others be deciding for? I was sure the majority would choose the first option. Some had already lost enough. Some had won enough. And I am sure a select few just wanted to see the grotesquerie to follow.
But undoubtedly greed would drive a number of the people seated around me to risk all their winnings for the chance of an 80% payout.
Only a few of us would be mad enough to Wager for the Deck.
That decision had already been made for me; it had been made for me the day I received Marvin’s posthumous letter. All I had to worry over was which of the six Attendants to choose. I stared at each of them, trying to guess who the winner would be, and was immediately frustrated. When it came to Baccarat, I had my wits and skill to get me ahead, but now all I had to rely on was luck, and as you know, I am no fan of luck.
It was then that I noticed that Attendant number five was the broken-nosed one. After a moment’s consideration, I wrote their number down. After three minutes had passed, Attendants began to file through the rows of seats and collect our bets
They made us wait a little longer before the Mistress of Ceremonies began to walk back and forth so everyone could get a good look at the revolver she was holding. She inserted five bullets into the cylinder and gave it a spin before clicking it firmly shut.
The Attendants began to sing, six dry voices keening as one, “Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now am found was blind but now I see-”
BLAM!
We all flinched in our seats at the sound. Attendant One crumpled to the floor, a smoldering wound in the back of their head. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on to the next.
“T’was Grace that taught my heart to fear. And Grace, my fears relieved. How precious did that grace appear. The hour I first believed-“
BLAM!
Attendant Two made a tiny gulping sound and pitched forward. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on.
“Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come; 'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home-”
BLAM!
Down went Attendant Three. We had grown used the sound now. Some of the audience leaned forward in their seats, eager and terrified, others slumped back, their posture and expression betraying the depths of their loss.
“The Lord has promised good to me. His word my hope secures. He will my shield and portion be. As long as life endures-”
BLAM!
Attendant Four dropped. A commotion broke out in the audience as the Smug High-Ranking Official tried to make a run for it. He went down in a swarm of black tuxedos and grasping liver-spotted hands.
“Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail. And mortal life shall cease. I shall possess within the veil. A life of joy and peace-”
Click.
An audible gasp went through us all. The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped over to the last of the Attendants.
“When we've been here ten thousand years. Bright shining as the sun. We've no less days to sing God's praise. Then when we've first begun.”
BLAM!
The sixth Attendant dropped. The game ended.
Section Five
I spent most of the next day relaxing and watching from my window as most of the guests of the Poelzig Experience left their trailers and headed home. I made a game of it, trying to guess by their posture and gait if they were leaving empty-handed or richer than before. The ones like me, the ones that had Wagered for the Deck and won were waiting for sunset, sitting in our trailers with bonbons and champagne.
And as for the ones that had wagered and lost? Their screams had been audible all morning but by my fifth glass of champagne, I had lost interest in such considerations. Time passed slowly and pleasantly, until sometime after lunch I laid my spinning head down on my pillow and imagined what Marvin had been doing at this point in the Experience. Had been drunk and relived like me or had he been worried? Was he still trying to decide what his winnings would be or did he know what he wanted? Had he wished I was there?
As I drifted off to sleep I remembered our last conversation. I’d asked him why he’d stopped gambling and he’d said, “We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
The knock on my door woke me up, it was time. The Attendant that greeted me was unfamiliar, they offered me a friendly grin. I asked the for a cigarette, of course, they had one. I enjoyed it, taking my time as they led me to the Yellow Tent. I found myself at the end of the line, which was exactly where I wanted to be. I found myself standing next to the Well-Dressed Movie Star. “You made it,” he said, his voice emotionless.
“Excited?” I made a quick count of who was left. There were eleven in all, eleven mad fools waiting for a chance to take control of the Engines of Creation, if only for a moment. No one had been allowed in yet.
“I just…” he glanced over to the side of the old barn where a trio of Attendants were hard at work digging a deep trench into the ground. Despite the dirt and the sweaty labor they still had their tuxedos on. The bodies of Attendants One, Two, Three, Four, and Six were lying nearby. “I just want this to be over.”
“Losing your nerve?” I asked.
“I could lose everything.”
And that was true. The first of us was ushered inside, I didn’t recognize the player and when they left the tent some time later they were cracking with joy. “Mine mine mine!” they shouted to the stars. The next player was ushered inside and it continued. It wasn’t until the third player entered the tent that we heard a scream. A few minutes later, a lifeless body was brought out; it was the Self-Made Millionaire, still dripping with blood as they were unceremoniously deposited into the freshly dug trench.
It took over two hours for the line to simply reach its halfway point but that was to be expected. After all, there was only one Deck, there was only one Charles Poelzig and unlike previous holders of the Old Deck, he wanted to play each game personally.
When it was the Well-Dressed Movie Star's turn, six out of the eleven among us had already been placed in the trench. It was impossible not to observe that one of them had been feebly struggling as they were thrown in.
He turned to me as one of the Attendants took him by the elbow, “Pray for me.”
And I had to laugh, how could anyone hope for a merciful God at a time like this?
The minutes ticked by, and uncertainty hung heavy in the air. I wondered to myself how many of the people who had come here truly understood what the Old Deck was, who understood that each card represented a being described in the Nine Rebel Sermons as ”Exalted beyond the realm of mortals, yet humbled by mortal frailty, bearing an essence both divine and earthly.”
When the Smartly-Dressed Movie Star left the tent thirty minutes later his head was held high. He flashed me a grin, “If you make it out call me.”
Then it was my turn.
I entered the tent to see the only table left standing was the one Charles Poelzig had chosen to sit at, and two chairs were placed on either side of it. The flagpole and its fan stood undisturbed. A new flag hung from it and upon the green fabric was the image of a series of overlapping, enigmatic symbols that brought to mind the image of something being torn apart. This was the suit of the Devourer of Visions the tenth card of the Old Deck In front of it were the five defeated players from last night’s game, heads shaven and mouths wired shut. They all had knives in their hands and their brand-new tuxedos were stained with the blood of the gamblers sent to the trench outside.
Near the opposite side of tent Attendant #5 sat on a makeshift throne made from three chairs stacked atop one another. They wore a paper crown on their head and ill-filling clothes that had been salvaged from one of the new Attendants. There was a metal briefcase on their lap. There was a look in their eyes that made me think of the expression a prisoner must have after being released from a long sentence.
With every step I took closer to Charles Poelzig the louder the sound of machinery became, the grinding metal being worked by a thousand gears and motors. A taste like rust filled my mouth. It was loudest when I took my seat, even now I couldn’t tell you if the sound was coming from beneath him or from him.
He glanced up from shuffling the seven remaining cards of the Old Deck. They were made of copper, and the faces of each held a symbol from a witch language birthed in the Screaming Nowhere. On the back of each was the sign of Ezerhodden. “You want the cards?” He asked.
“Why else would I be here?” I said.
The five freshly anointed Attendants moved to stand behind me, their knives at the ready. Poelzig smiled at me, “You were Marvin Greene’s lover.”
“Marvin’s dead.”
“Suicide,” Poelzig said, “Icarus flying too close to the sun.”
“What was his prize?” I asked.
“He’s dead. Does it matter?”
I said, “It matters to me.”
Poelzeg shook his head derisively, “Is that why you’re here? All this just to win an answer to a silly little question?”
“That’s not what I want, but I’d like to know just the same.”
He waved my question away and began to shuffle the Old Deck again. “The rules are this, I draw a card, you draw a card. The higher card wins the round. You keep your card and we begin again until the cards are gone. You win you get our prize. You lose…” he pointed to the Attendants, “and they get you.”
The absurdity was almost too much to bear, the simplest of games turned into a matter of life and death. I watched his hands as they cut and recut the deck, I knew the tricks for stacking a deck. It looked like he was playing fair.
Poelzeg set the deck down between us, “I’ll begin.”
He drew the top card uncovering a divided shape that looked like two faces connected at the center, perfectly reflecting each other. This was the fifth suit of the Old Deck, the sign of Korvylar, the Void-Harbinger.
My draw was next, the card felt cold and metallic to the touch. My fingertips tingled after I set it down, exposing a jagged, circular glyph an insectile eye. This was the first card, Zyvrathul- the Veilweaver. It was early in the game but I still felt a tremor of fear, not the fear of dying but the fear of losing.
My expression must have been obvious because Poelzig began to smirk. “Too late to turn back now.”
“I wouldn’t miss this for the world,” I said. “Tell me what he asked for.”
“Do you think it will help you?” He selected his next card from the top of the deck. It was Xyrlith, the Abbess of Murmurs, the second suit symbolized as a fluid angular mouth-like symbol.
“Are you afraid to tell me?”
Poelzeg tapped the deck, “Draw or default.”
My card was the sixth suit, Thranok, the Desolate Conflux, a series of concentric circles, each containing an arcane spiral.
“An even score in the second round,” he said. “A rarity.”
“How was Marvin doing at this point?”
He chuckled, “Are you always this tenacious? No wonder you’ve come from such a lowly background to make such a fortune.”
That stung a little, I stung back. “We can’t all inherit our wealth. Such a tragedy your parents died so young.”
Despite the provocation his voice softened, “He was winning by now, a score of thirteen.”
That was Marvin all right. Always lucky until he wasn’t. “What did he ask for?”
Poelzeg smiled wickedly, “His third card.”
I mirrored his smile, “His prize. What was his prize? Maybe I want the same thing.”
“Oh,” he laughed, “I doubt that.”
“Why?”
Rather than responding, he proceeded to draw his next card, unveiling the eleventh suit known as Drak'mor, the Abyssal Chariot. This card depicted a cosmic wheel with galaxies arranged as spokes. “Oh dear. That’s eighteen to seven.”
There were only two cards left, the fourth and twelfth suit. One life and one death. My hand hovered over the deck but I dropped it back, “What did he want?”
He threw up his arms, “If I tell you will you finish the game?”
I nodded. The sooner this was over the better.
Poelzeg leaned in conspiratorially, “He wanted to know always know the odds.”
“The odds?” I said, “That’s all?”
He nodded solemnly. "And that is precisely what he received - complete and utter revelation. He knew the result of every coin flip, dice roll, and outcome you could imagine.”
I heard Marvin’s voice in my head, louder than the hum of the fans, louder than the rustling of the flag, louder even than the impossible machine-like roar that churned around us.
“We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
I drew my final card, Sylthara Who Bleeds at the Threshold, a line, a cross, and a curve that somehow resolved itself into a peculiar and human-like shape. The twelfth card.
And just like that, I had won. Visibly disappointed, the new Attendants slunk back to the other side of the room. Poelzeg stared at me with amusement.
“Lucky, lucky. Must be how you survived in the entertainment industry.” He waited for retaliation, but I simply looked away and turned over the last card of the deck to reveal the fourth suit of the Old Deck - Ithryndra, the Conduit of Divine Grace.
"I was supposed to do that," Poelzeg remarked.
Leaning forward, I added, "They say Ithyranda’s followers gain the gift of immortality."
His eyes sparked with interest. "Is that what you desire?"
Resting my hand on my chin, I pretended to ponder. "It depends on the true meaning of immortality."
Poelzeg huffed, "Immortality means immortality."
"You must be aware of the drawbacks," I pressed, a note of accusation creeping into my words.
"I can’t say."
"Can't or won't?" I inquired.
Poelzeg's smile wavered. "What are you going on about? Claim your prize."
"Marvin loved to cheat," I explained, "cheat at cards, cheat at business, he even cheated on me."
Poelzeg snorted, "I can't imagine why."
"He believed his Prize would make everything easy, but he received more than that, didn't he?" I continued. "You mentioned that he saw everything, every possible outcome. He didn't just know the result of each poker hand; he knew the odds of the dealer getting cancer, of the player next to him cheating on their spouse. He couldn't even walk down the street without knowing the probability of the man on the sidewalk turning left or right."
"So?" I persisted, my voice unwavering.
Poelzeg sighed, "So what?"
"You could have warned him, but it amused you not to," I accused. "What will happen to the others who played tonight?" I inquired.
"I've answered enough questions," Poelzeg replied.
I leaned back in my seat, contemplating immortality, wealth, forbidden wisdom, and hidden worlds. I had the power to choose anything I desired.
But then, memories of that fateful night in Singapore flooded my mind.
Poelzeg's eyes narrowed, his patience running thin. "What. Is. Your. Prize?"
A smile spread across my face.
Section Six
When it was over, I sat alone at the table with the Old Deck. The sounds of the Engines of Creation were fading now. I wondered what the Old Deck had originally been meant to do. What strange alchemy had it been meant to work? Surely nothing like the Poelzeg Experience. Even the Nine Rebel Sermons had been unclear on that point, only saying that ”Each disciple of Ezerhodden reverently received their sacred card, clutching it tightly to their bosom, and embarked upon a solemn pilgrimage into the Verge to smite the children of Mazzikin…”
I began to shuffle the deck; there was something about the feel of those cards in your hand that made you have to shuffle them. And with each motion of my fingers, the sensation became more pleasurable. In my mind's eye, I saw how each of the missing cards had been destroyed: the first during a clandestine gathering of scholars in an ancient library, the second during a midnight ritual in a desolate cemetery during the 17th century, the third during the 19th-century Arctic expedition led by Captain John Franklin during a desperate performance of the Rite of Edgagor, and the fifth lost in the ruins of Tunguska. I saw the Old Deck travel the world, from a temple shrine in the Babylonian city of Kish to the bedside of Cesare Borgia to the offices of Charles Poelzeg.
Then I looked up and saw the woman in the green dress standing before me. Up close, I could see the thick pancake makeup, rouge, and eyeliner she wore. Only her lips were bare of cosmetics, and they were thin and bloodless. Despite the fact that I knew her face was flesh and blood, there was still something about her that made me think she was wearing a mask.
I handed her the Old Deck and then allowed one of the Attendants to deliver me back to the airport.
From there, my life settled into a quiet monotony. I got older, I got richer. I got married, I got divorced. I committed crimes, I avoided jail. And today, I find myself in a summer home transformed into a hospice, talking to the most foolish of my nephews.
My sources tell me you’re a horrible gambler. How much of your wife’s money have you lost over the last two years? A little over a million? A little less? If you get on that plane to Columbia you’ll lose more. The greedy stooges behind your invitation are counting on it.
The sources that mentioned your vulnerability also informed me of the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. During the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
that there's a statue of the Seventh Barishamada at the center of this casino slash amusement park you’ll be going to. It is over twenty feet tall and made of brass. They tell me that on the last night of the Festival, a bonfire is lit beneath it and the air fills with screams and smoke.
The same sources that revealed your vulnerability also provided me with details about this upcoming venture. They mentioned the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino slash amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. I've been informed that during the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
Hear me out. Don’t go. Your wife and children will burn and you will be reduced to a toothless, hairless ruin aged beyond their years.
Good. If you want to win something back, aim to reclaim your heart and soul. Be more than just a swindler and a gullible gambler.
Now, it's time for you to go. I've been told I don't have much time left, and I'd rather spend it in peace in my garden with my duck pond.
As for my Prize, I thought about other temptations like money, power, or second chances. But what I truly wanted is what I received my hands around Charles Poelzeg’s throat.
END TRANSCRIPT
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2023.12.02 20:33 matte_purple 2023 Week 13 Big 12 Uniform Tracker: The Gang Finishes the Regular Season

Hello CFB! Welcome to the 2023 Big XII Uniform Tracker in Week 13! Well ladies and gentlemen, we have arrived. While it's not the result anyone expected coming into the season, we still had some fun, still had some laughs, and now get to sit tight and see what’s next! Let's review the week that was. In case you are unfamiliar with how my tracker works, I catalog every Big 12 team’s uniform combination week-to-week, and also look at the opposition’s suits. I also compile our future institutions in Arizona, Colorado, Arizona State, and Utah. I provide a few of my thoughts on the game, the uniforms, and a brief history of the series and/or fun facts. Let's get to it, and please enjoy!
I’m u/matte_purple and let’s 3, 2, 1, go!
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Texas Christian University Horned Frogs at University of Oklahoma Sooners (OU Wins, 69-45)
TCU: Black/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/VGJIzbj )
OU: Red/Red/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/NKlRQzy )
QB Dillon Gabriel passed for 400 yards and three touchdowns to help No. 13 Oklahoma defeat the TCU Horned Frogs in convincing fashion. TCU made it tough in the second half before the Sooners pulled away, with big plays from QB Josh Hoover (passed for 344 yards and four touchdowns) and RB Emani Bailey (ran for 150 yards, with a receiving and rushing TD). The Sooners finished the regular season undefeated at home, and it was the fourth time the Sooners scored at least 50 points in a home game this season.
Oklahoma got their “once-a-season alternate” box checked and went back to the basics. And just like Texas, there is definitely a reason to go with the standard. It looks really good! It’s worth noting that these were updated in 2018. Very few changes, mostly in the font, slightly enlarging the helmet logo, and adjusting striping for a new template. I wont mince words anymore, they’re classic and iconic. I think a true “crimson and cream” throwback would look really, really good, but alas, I don’t know if it will happen.
TCU finally added the stand-alone Horned Frog logo to a black shell. I love it. I thought the “Sooner Slayer” helmets last year were great. In fact, I ranked them 3rd place in my new helmets category at last year’s Big XII uniform awards (you can find that post pinned at the top of my profile). But these feel fresh while not going too far. I don’t like the weird cross-hatching pattern on the shell of them, but you can only really see it with direct illumination. They were paired with another all-white uniform (which seems to show up often in this week’s tracker). I’ve always liked the “Black Panther” collars, and they add a nice pop of purple to an otherwise lacking uniform. Good look, but with no bowl game, this will have to be the last uniform we see from TCU this season.
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University of Texas Longhorns vs Texas Tech University Red Raiders (UT Wins, 57-7)
TTU: Black/White/Black (Link: https://imgur.com/a/ceXZwgU )
UT: White/Orange/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/J1JORfo )
Yeah, so, Texas Tech DID play in this game. I watched for some of it, so I can confirm. But for the most part, it was clear the Longhorns remembered Brett Yormark’s comments on “taking care of business” in the off-season. This was a tornado in a trailer park kind of game. Nothing Tech did worked, and everything Texas did succeeded. QB Behren Morton threw for only 88 yds on 19-36 passes, with 3 INTs making things worse. RB Taj Brooks, a battering ram in his own right, only gained 95 yds on 19 carries. At least the Red Raiders are heading to a Bowl Game. The Longhorns will face Oklahoma State in the conference championship game.
Oh Texas, you were one of the worst teams I could have picked for a Championship game uniform on this tracker. They do not and WILL not wear anything other than the standard. There’s something to be said for that level of commitment to the look. Now don’t let my pessimism fool you. I still very much like these all-white Texas uniforms! There’s a reason they only get updated sporadically. They look iconic and tend to really pop with both their home and away suits. Great (albeit predictable) look from Texas.
Texas Tech wore an Oreo combo once again. We saw this look back in Week 8, and saw the throwback version of it last year versus Oklahoma State in Week 6. I’m a little chapped that we didn't see more of the throwbacks in what is speculated to be the final season of these uniforms. They looked fantastic, featured the beautiful retro Double T logo, and just felt like the Red Raiders style more than the chevron, dual-stripe madness of the current fatigues. Maybe I’m just too sentimental. Oh well. At this point, All we can do is wait for a bowl game and wait for the new uniform release. The Oreo is one of my more favorite combos from the current repertoire.
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Oklahoma State University Cowboys vs Brigham Young University Cougars (OSU Wins, 40-34)
BYU: Blue/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/1UusQBr )
OSU: Black/Orange/Black (Link: https://imgur.com/a/ohrxYs1 )
Wooh boy. Oklahoma State really knows how to steal a show OR really has a masochism problem. I was fearing we may see an OU-Texas CCG when BYU was up 24-6 at halftime. A pick-six by CB Eddie Heckard, an 11 yd TD run by Cougar WR Keelan Marion, and several field goals had the Pokes reeling. But they didn’t give in. OSU completed their third largest comeback in school history to strike out and take the lead with a minute left in the 4th. A blocked PAT put the game in the Kicker’s hands for BYU, who sent it to overtime. I can’t talk about the Pokes without mentioning the breakout RB Ollie Gordon II. He had 3 TDs during the game proper, but tacked on 2 more during overtime. BYU could have won the game with a successful score and 2 PT try, but a RECOVERED FUMBLE put the game away for the Cowboys. Another wild roller coaster game for the Stillwater crew. BYU fell just short of a bowl game berth and will no doubt be hungry to get back on the horse come August 31st versus Southern Illinois.
Oklahoma State came out wearing the classic. This Black/Orange/Black combo was first worn in 2011, and quickly became a fan favorite. It just SCREAMS Cowboy. The standard brand logo on the helmet, the updated typeface on the front, retro striping and unadorned pants makes this a gorgeous look. This is only the 4th brand logo we’ve seen on the helmet this year, and it was needed. I’m hoping to see the old-school brand logo on more helmets next year, but who knows? Maybe we see it in a bowl game? By the way, out of each primary colored jersey, the black has to be my favorite. Good luck to the COwboys in the Big XII Title game!
BYU put on these deliciously stylish, mostly-white uniforms with the royal lid. Man these look great. They matched up very well against Oklahoma State’s orange and black, with royal being almost a direct opposite color to orange. In fact, this may be one of my favorite uniform matchups of the year, along with BYU-Texas. We saw these in Week 3 of last season AND in Week 7 (sort of, those ones had hand painted helmets of the same color). These are just gorgeous. By the way, these are called the “Royal Sitake” uniforms. So named because they mimic HC Sitake’s uniform combos while he played at BYU. Nuff said.
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West Virginia University Mountaineers vs Baylor University Bears (WVU Wins, 34-31)
BU: Yellow/Yellow/Green (Link: https://imgur.com/a/pU0jQca )
WVU: Blue/Gray/Blue (Link: https://imgur.com/a/M2YHNbD )
The Bears from Waco tried to play catch-up from the get-go, gained the lead in the 4th quarter, but faltered after WVU QB Garret Greene threw a 29-yd touchdown pass in the last 30 seconds of the game. Baylor’s close loss put them firmly in 13th place and on a 5 game losing streak. Hopefully they can snap that streak next year against the Tarleton State Texans on August 31st. The Mountaineers found a way to rally after the green-and-gold RB Richard Reese ran back two kickoffs for TDs. What is Dave Aranda’s future in Waco? I guess we shall see.
This was the second time this season GRAY has been paired against Baylor. This time paired up a little bit better, though. A repeat uniform for Baylor, I have really enjoyed the wealth of combinations worn this season. Last year, we saw only one game where yellow was worn in any meaningful capacity. This year has seen it back in the fray. I think I’ll call this the “North Dakota State-ification” of the Bear’s uniforms. They truly have improved in a major way. The font is a little slim on the “11” number, but you can only have so many of those. Overall I’m pleased with the variety Baylor has put out.
I thought that WVU had simply chosen to wear gray once this year, back in Week 2. But I guess they wanted to give us some “surprise” factor. Now, I wasn't a huge fan of the gray uniform worn last year against the Townson Tigers, but I think these really lend themselves to greatness when worn as away uniforms. They seem to be a little controversial among WVU fans, but the gray balances out both the blue surrounding it and the yellow accents nicely. I'm excited to see where they land and what they wear for their bowl game. How about a better season for West Virginia, huh? From the bottom of the rankings in preseason to the upper half, I'll bet the Mountaineers are feeling alright!
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University of Houston Cougars at University of Central Florida Knights (UCF Wins, 27-13)
UCF: Black/Black/Black (Link: https://imgur.com/a/Dgp7GtT )
UH: Red/White/Red (Link: https://imgur.com/a/wwtAIg3 )
Both UCF and Houston - along with our other two additions - struggled early in their first season in the Big 12. Which, for the most part, was expected by most fans I talked to. The four newcomers combined for a record of 7-25 in the conference entering the final weekend with those four teams combining for only four wins against legacy Big 12 opponents. The Cougars were the only team to get two wins over those teams. Though they had something of an edge, the Cougar’s couldn’t find solid ground after their first initial score. The Knights, on the other hand, had a big game and found the 6-win threshold for a bowl game. Knights QB John Rhys Plumlee had a big game, completing 23-27 for 253 yds and 58 yds in the rushing attack. He threw for one TD and ran for another. RB RJ Harvey had a substantial day as well, carrying the rock 21 times for 136 yds and 2 TDs. The Knight’s defense certainly helped out. Houston was 1-10 on 3rd down attempts and 3-5 on 4th downs. Houston is now without a HC, and will definitely be a different team next season.
UCF wore their standard all-black uniform with a new helmet! In fact, UCF was pretty close to wearing a new helmet every week this season. This one in particular looks similar to last year’s Week 12 lid worn against rival USF, but this one doesn’t have the front facing knight on both sides (only the right side) with “UCF” gracing the left. Also, the EQ team chose to remove the large pointed center stripe from this rendition in what I consider to be an improvement. I LOVE the front-facing Knight logo. Aside from the Space Game helmets, these may be my favorite. The all black matched up well against Houston’s red and white.
Houston! This was a great look! Like most Houston uniforms, these were fairly plain, but I can respect a team that lets their color do the talking. The Coogs have a red that just stands out to some other maroons/crimson shades. Like always, the two-tone stripes on the legs freak me out a little. Additionally, I desperately want to see a new logo on these helmets. Being an efficient, no-nonsense look, those are the only things I can really critique. Not the greatest uniforms, but CERTAINLY not bad ones. Better luck next year, Cougar fans!
​
University of Kansas Jayhawks at University of Cincinnati Bearcats (KU Wins, 49-16)
UC: Black/Black/Black (Link: https://imgur.com/a/9So36V2 )
KU: White/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/yyv3uQA )
QB Jason Bean returned from injury and threw a pair of touchdown passes and ran for rushing TDs of 40+ yds, and helped Kansas snap a two-game losing streak against a heavily outmatched Cincinnati. RB Devin Neal rushed for 106 yards and two TDs for the Jayhawks, and CB Cobee Bryant had a masterful one-handed interception. Speaking of Neal, he now has 3,006 rushing yds for his career, placing him fifth all-time on KU’s list. He needs 69 yards to grab the fourth place spot. This is KU’s first winning season since 2008 and Cincinnati’s worst since 1999. Both teams will need to prove themselves going forward into a wild and chaotic new Big 12.
KU’s all white look is something to behold. Thank goodness KU ditched the Trajan font. These white uniforms that were released in July look great against Cincinnati’s all-black uniform in this classic contrasting matchup. This was my favorite look of theirs last year, and their new uniform template made it EVEN BETTER. These are very similar to the ones worn in Week 3, against Nevada, but this time they broke out a blue facemask for the look that provides a necessary pop of color that I crave.
Cincinnati broke out ol’ reliable. The blackout look has been worn twice this season, once with a military appreciation logo. It looks mean, it looks clean, and most importantly it looks like Cincinnati. Sure they look good in red and white, but black is really their stock and trade. The main part of this is - of course - the overdose of the C-Paw everywhere, but that works in UC’s favor here. The red shoulder cuffs and collar continue to be my favorite part of these, but I think if I were a bold EQ manager, I might have tried out a red facemask. I don’t know if that is blasphemous for the Bearcats, but it sure would look cool. The 2023 rebrand simplified the Bearcat’s overall design, and I would certainly call it a success.
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Kansas State University Wildcats vs Iowa State University Cyclones (ISU Wins, 42-35)
ISU: Red/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/Gg9qTkl )
KSU: SilvePurple/Silver (Link: https://imgur.com/a/zrVS0gR )
Farmaggedon! This game is the single-longest never-interrupted rivalry in college football. After starting the rivalry in 1917, these two teams played through the 1918 flu pandemic and World War 2. Both schools could be considered “the first land grant university,” with K-State the first campus created under the Morrill Land Act of 1863 and Iowa State being the first actually designated as a land grant university. Needless to say, this is an important historical game for the Big 12. And this year it was snowy and fun! I’ll try and avoid my biases. Each of the Cyclones’s scoring drives were 4 PLAYS OR LESS. ARE YOU KIDDING? Obviously, K-State still did well on offense, just relying on more sustained drives, but the defense simply could not contend with Iowa State’s big drives. Cyclone RB Abu Sama III took the first snap of the game 71 yds up the gut and to the house, and trampled all over K-State through the ensuing 60 minutes. Not the result my flair would have hoped for, but it was still a pretty fun game to watch.
Iowa State wore their most common away look of the season, which we’ve seen in Week 7 and 11 of this year and Week 11 of last year. I think I prefer the white/white/red away look, but having one piece of the uniform being cardinal tends to balance out the rest of the uniform. The font design and the shoulder accents provide a uniqueness that the logo or other aspects don’t quite get right, so overall, it’s a pretty okay design! I am really looking forward to the day the “AMES” helmets and maybe another logo gets used again, which would instantly bump ISU’s uniforms up a notch. These were updated in 2018, so I don’t expect anything new in terms of jersey design, but the helmet could use some help.
Aesthetically, this was a downright beautiful game. The snow coming down in Manhattan looked heavenly against the purple and silver of the ‘Cats. The red from ISU popped wonderfully, and overall I’m just pleased with how this one looked. Again, K-State wore the standard uniform from the Snyder years. I doubt we’ll see anything new in the bowl game, but I’d bet money we see a new helmet at some point next year.
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BONUS UNIFORMS! Let’s see what the future Big 12 schools from the Four Corners did this week!
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University of Colorado Buffaloes at University of Utah Utes (Utah Wins, 23-17)
CU: Black/White/Gold (Link: https://imgur.com/a/SWGoufi )
Utah: White/Black/Black (Link: https://imgur.com/a/phaCjSy )
Utah beat the Buffaloes for the seventh straight time in the rivalry series. And forced Colorado to their sixth straight loss to end the season, finishing in last place in the PAC-12 for the second straight time. Freshman Ryan Staub gave the Buffaloes a fighting chance, however.
Making his first career start, Staub threw an 18-yard TD pass to Travis Hunter midway through the fourth quarter to pull the Buffs within a score, but Utah’s consistent scoring held on and pushed them out of reach. Staub completed 17-of-24 passes for 195 yards. Star CB/WR Travis Hunter caught eight passes for 107 yards. Coach Prime’s offense struggled for most of the game, and Utah’s QB Luke Bottari, in his first start for the Utes, put in a solid performance. He scored two rushing TDs - adding to a run-heavy day for Utah - passing for only 61 yds on 6-10 attempts. Despite a disappointing season for the Buffs, there’s plenty of talent on the Boulder-based team. We’ll see how these two teams do in the Big 12!
This is the first time we’ve seen Utah’s traditional white helmet since way back in Week 3 of this season. It was paired rather smartly with a black jersey and pants. I think I may actually like this better than Week 10’s blackout look. This seems more… traditional? I know it isn’t, but sometimes incorporating little bits of another color convinces me it's not just a “Black for Black’s Sake” uniform. (Yes, I know Utah has had black uniforms for a long time, and has pretty much adopted black as an official color) I think it’s interesting that Utah can have such great Under Armor uniforms - even if they were released in 2017 - while schools like Texas Tech have had far less UA success with newer renditions.
Colorado has a lot going on. I might as well acknowledge the mismatched, tri-color uniforms. It is well known I don’t like them. But the issue is compounded by these gold pants. The shade of gold on the pants doesn’t match the gold leaf in the font, and neither of those match the shiny gold Buffs logo on the helmet. I think CU’s use of gold this season has been admirable, as so many teams have moved from gold to “gold” (as in yellow, I see you BAYLOR). But a more consistent shade would be nice. Pairing these jerseys with black pants and the same black helmet would be an AWESOME away look, but it wouldn’t contrast enough with Utah’s look. In which case, an all white/gold-accented uniform like we saw in Week 1 would be wonderful. So overall it's kind of middle-of-the-road. In closing, I am very, VERY excited for the confirmed new uniforms we’ll see for the Buffaloes before their Big 12 return.
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Arizona State University Sun Devils vs University of Arizona Wildcats (Arizona Wins, 59-23)
UA: White/White/White (Link: https://imgur.com/a/lwcp9yj )
ASU: Gold/Maroon/Gold (Link: https://imgur.com/a/AYkIKn2 )
The Territorial Cup. The Duel in the Desert. One of college football’s oldest rivalries. And one of the more intense. Adding this clash to the Big 12 is going to be so incredibly fun. Why is it called the Territorial Cup? Because Arizona was still a territory in 1899, when the first Thanksgiving day matchup between the two occurred. AZ did not become a state until 1912. The rivalry has always seemed close, despite the series having a 51-45-1 record in favor of the Wildcats. QB Noah Fifita capped his first season as the starter by setting an Arizona program record for passing yards in a game. He completed 30-41 passes for a remarkable 527 yds and five TDs. The offense in general found ways to barrel past the Sun Devils, who notched pedestrian yardage all game. Better luck next year, Diablos. With the win, the Wildcats move to 9-3 on the season, hold sole possession of third place in the Pac-12 and are staring a Sun Bowl or an Alamo Bowl bid in the face to cap off the final season of the Pac-12. The Wildcats end the regular season on a six-game win streak.
ASU wore a traditional, and BEAUTIFUL combo. The classic gold/maroon/gold uniform combination with Sparky and his single maroon center stripe to accompany him is one of the best helmets and combos in all of football. I mean it. The colors are recognizable. The Sparky logo (which has appeared in most games from 1980-2010, and at least once a season from 2014 on) is just excellent. I especially love the white outline around the numbers on the maroon jersey. The sublimated Arizona flag design on the sides under the arms is a subtle touch. My only gripe is the large pitchfork on the legs, per usual, but this will easily rank in the top of ASU’s uniforms for this season. I declare the new 2023 uniform update a success!
Arizona rocked the all-white for the second time this season. Man do they look good. They look so good, in fact, that I only have one wish: The shoulder stripes are not two-tone like the rest of the suit. Granted, the same goes for their red and blue editions of the Desert Swarm suits, but it is much more evident here, as the striping is the most amount of color on the uniforms. The pants and helmet stripe looks unique and cool; I wish the shoulders were the same. Oh well, they looked very nice! Also, a white face mask might have looked neat, but we didn’t see one of those this season. I’ll get more into my thoughts about their wardrobe in the offseason, but overall, I’m happy with the consistency and style they bring to the table.
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And that's that! Week 13, and the regular season, is finished up. Take a bow, we did it. Another wild, wild year in the Heartland. I hope some of these threads and matchups tickled your fancy. How do you feel about your team’s performance? Who are you rooting for in the Dr. Pepper Championship Game? What will your team wear in the bowl game? Any thoughts about the tracker? Please leave a comment, upvote, or DM with any questions! I love reading comments and digging up old uniforms from my spreadsheets. I hope you enjoyed the Big 12’s Week 13 edition of the Uniform Tracker! Have an excellent week! Enjoy watching the Championship Game (which is what I’m doing now). Stay warm out there, enjoy the holidays, and we’ll see you next week with the OSU - Texas recap and some bowl game predictions!
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2023.12.01 15:15 ChannelAb3 THE POLZEIG EXPERIENCE Part two

PREVIOUS PART
​
Despite my aches and pains, I had no problem sleeping that night. There were dreams again, but this time they were vivid and memorable. They were filled with distorted images of a grand staircase descending into the unknown, walls bending inward, and open doors leading to revealed nothing but shadows. But one hallway drew me in, its yellow curtains swaying lazily. With each step further down the hall, the curtains moved and rippled more, and I began to hear a humming that came from either behind the veil of fabric or perhaps the fabric itself. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch the curtains; the material was damp and warm to the touch. Strange yet familiar symbols flitted out from where my fingers had brushed the fabric. The static music rose up, filling my mind with names from the lost cards of the Old Deck - Zyvrathul, Grythar, Vyraska, Astrylith.
Finally, inevitably, the hallway brought me to a dead-end alcove. That was where Marvin was waiting for me. He sat at a table with a revolver in his hand.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Waiting for you,” he answered.
“Why did you do it?”
He placed the revolver to his head, “Because I won.”
Mercifully, I woke up before he pulled the trigger.
At around ten in the morning, an Attendant delivered me a paper plate covered with warm Eggo waffles and a cup of tepid water. When I asked for seconds of both, they happily brought them to me. Six hours later, I was brought a thermos of coffee, a bag lunch containing a sandwich, and an apple. I asked if there was anything to read, and they brought me Volume 71 of Reader’s Digest condensed books. It was all I needed to pass the time until sunset.
I was almost finished with the first book in the volume when the Attendant came to fetch me. This time when I entered the Yellow Tent, I was given a square of paper and a miniature pencil. One side of the paper was a tally of my baccarat winnings, the other was blank. I ended up standing in line next to the Self-Made Millionaire. “All this… nonsense,” he said. “The Old Deck is in the hands of a lunatic.”
“What’s left of the Old Deck, you mean,” someone else commented.
I kept my silence; there were Attendants everywhere, and I knew one of them must have heard. Let someone else find visitors in their trailer tonight.
And besides, in all my studies about the Old Deck, I’d never heard of a single innocent or rational soul having it in their possession. The previous owner of the Old Deck had been a ruthless harridan who made her fortune in real estate and was supposedly secretly involved in the death of Evelyn McHale and the establishment of the National Prayer Breakfast.
It was open seating in the Yellow Tent. I chose the third row of the right corner and settled in, the pencil and paper resting on one knee. This time the suit depicted hanging over the stage depicted two symbolic figures intertwined in an otherworldly dance. This was the ninth card of the Old Deck, the sign of the Tearer of Realms.
The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped onto the stage and instructed us that we would be given three minutes to make our choice, and then the slips of paper and pencils would be collected. She further explained that we could either bet nothing at all, all our winnings, or Wager for the Deck. We were also instructed to mark down our competitor of choice as clearly as possible. Then she clapped her hands twice, and six of the Attendants filed out onto the stage, each wearing a medallion with a number around their chest.
I thought of the Owner of a Regional Supermarket Chain and the other losers from last night, their fortunes lost and their futures uncertain. I imagined them traveling home, both disappointed and relieved to have been spared this choice.
Nothing at all. All my winnings. Wager for the Deck.
What would the others be deciding for? I was sure the majority would choose the first option. Some had already lost enough. Some had won enough. And I am sure a select few just wanted to see the grotesquerie to follow.
But undoubtedly greed would drive a number of the people seated around me to risk all their winnings for the chance of an 80% payout.
Only a few of us would be mad enough to Wager for the Deck.
That decision had already been made for me; it had been made for me the day I received Marvin’s posthumous letter. All I had to worry over was which of the six Attendants to choose. I stared at each of them, trying to guess who the winner would be, and was immediately frustrated. When it came to Baccarat, I had my wits and skill to get me ahead, but now all I had to rely on was luck, and as you know, I am no fan of luck.
It was then that I noticed that Attendant number five was the broken-nosed one. After a moment’s consideration, I wrote their number down. After three minutes had passed, Attendants began to file through the rows of seats and collect our bets
They made us wait a little longer before the Mistress of Ceremonies began to walk back and forth so everyone could get a good look at the revolver she was holding. She inserted five bullets into the cylinder and gave it a spin before clicking it firmly shut.
The Attendants began to sing, six dry voices keening as one, “Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now am found was blind but now I see-”
BLAM!
We all flinched in our seats at the sound. Attendant One crumpled to the floor, a smoldering wound in the back of their head. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on to the next.
“T’was Grace that taught my heart to fear. And Grace, my fears relieved. How precious did that grace appear. The hour I first believed-“
BLAM!
Attendant Two made a tiny gulping sound and pitched forward. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on.
“Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come; 'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home-”
BLAM!
Down went Attendant Three. We had grown used the sound now. Some of the audience leaned forward in their seats, eager and terrified, others slumped back, their posture and expression betraying the depths of their loss.
“The Lord has promised good to me. His word my hope secures. He will my shield and portion be. As long as life endures-”
BLAM!
Attendant Four dropped. A commotion broke out in the audience as the Smug High-Ranking Official tried to make a run for it. He went down in a swarm of black tuxedos and grasping liver-spotted hands.
“Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail. And mortal life shall cease. I shall possess within the veil. A life of joy and peace-”
Click.
An audible gasp went through us all. The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped over to the last of the Attendants.
“When we've been here ten thousand years. Bright shining as the sun. We've no less days to sing God's praise. Then when we've first begun.”
BLAM!
The sixth Attendant dropped. The game ended.
Section Five
I spent most of the next day relaxing and watching from my window as most of the guests of the Poelzig Experience left their trailers and headed home. I made a game of it, trying to guess by their posture and gait if they were leaving empty-handed or richer than before. The ones like me, the ones that had Wagered for the Deck and won were waiting for sunset, sitting in our trailers with bonbons and champagne.
And as for the ones that had wagered and lost? Their screams had been audible all morning but by my fifth glass of champagne, I had lost interest in such considerations. Time passed slowly and pleasantly, until sometime after lunch I laid my spinning head down on my pillow and imagined what Marvin had been doing at this point in the Experience. Had been drunk and relived like me or had he been worried? Was he still trying to decide what his winnings would be or did he know what he wanted? Had he wished I was there?
As I drifted off to sleep I remembered our last conversation. I’d asked him why he’d stopped gambling and he’d said, “We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
The knock on my door woke me up, it was time. The Attendant that greeted me was unfamiliar, they offered me a friendly grin. I asked the for a cigarette, of course, they had one. I enjoyed it, taking my time as they led me to the Yellow Tent. I found myself at the end of the line, which was exactly where I wanted to be. I found myself standing next to the Well-Dressed Movie Star. “You made it,” he said, his voice emotionless.
“Excited?” I made a quick count of who was left. There were eleven in all, eleven mad fools waiting for a chance to take control of the Engines of Creation, if only for a moment. No one had been allowed in yet.
“I just…” he glanced over to the side of the old barn where a trio of Attendants were hard at work digging a deep trench into the ground. Despite the dirt and the sweaty labor they still had their tuxedos on. The bodies of Attendants One, Two, Three, Four, and Six were lying nearby. “I just want this to be over.”
“Losing your nerve?” I asked.
“I could lose everything.”
And that was true. The first of us was ushered inside, I didn’t recognize the player and when they left the tent some time later they were cracking with joy. “Mine mine mine!” they shouted to the stars. The next player was ushered inside and it continued. It wasn’t until the third player entered the tent that we heard a scream. A few minutes later, a lifeless body was brought out; it was the Self-Made Millionaire, still dripping with blood as they were unceremoniously deposited into the freshly dug trench.
It took over two hours for the line to simply reach its halfway point but that was to be expected. After all, there was only one Deck, there was only one Charles Poelzig and unlike previous holders of the Old Deck, he wanted to play each game personally.
When it was the Well-Dressed Movie Star's turn, six out of the eleven among us had already been placed in the trench. It was impossible not to observe that one of them had been feebly struggling as they were thrown in.
He turned to me as one of the Attendants took him by the elbow, “Pray for me.”
And I had to laugh, how could anyone hope for a merciful God at a time like this?
The minutes ticked by, and uncertainty hung heavy in the air. I wondered to myself how many of the people who had come here truly understood what the Old Deck was, who understood that each card represented a being described in the Nine Rebel Sermons as ”Exalted beyond the realm of mortals, yet humbled by mortal frailty, bearing an essence both divine and earthly.”
When the Smartly-Dressed Movie Star left the tent thirty minutes later his head was held high. He flashed me a grin, “If you make it out call me.”
Then it was my turn.
I entered the tent to see the only table left standing was the one Charles Poelzig had chosen to sit at, and two chairs were placed on either side of it. The flagpole and its fan stood undisturbed. A new flag hung from it and upon the green fabric was the image of a series of overlapping, enigmatic symbols that brought to mind the image of something being torn apart. This was the suit of the Devourer of Visions the tenth card of the Old Deck In front of it were the five defeated players from last night’s game, heads shaven and mouths wired shut. They all had knives in their hands and their brand-new tuxedos were stained with the blood of the gamblers sent to the trench outside.
Near the opposite side of tent Attendant #5 sat on a makeshift throne made from three chairs stacked atop one another. They wore a paper crown on their head and ill-filling clothes that had been salvaged from one of the new Attendants. There was a metal briefcase on their lap. There was a look in their eyes that made me think of the expression a prisoner must have after being released from a long sentence.
With every step I took closer to Charles Poelzig the louder the sound of machinery became, the grinding metal being worked by a thousand gears and motors. A taste like rust filled my mouth. It was loudest when I took my seat, even now I couldn’t tell you if the sound was coming from beneath him or from him.
He glanced up from shuffling the seven remaining cards of the Old Deck. They were made of copper, and the faces of each held a symbol from a witch language birthed in the Screaming Nowhere. On the back of each was the sign of Ezerhodden. “You want the cards?” He asked.
“Why else would I be here?” I said.
The five freshly anointed Attendants moved to stand behind me, their knives at the ready. Poelzig smiled at me, “You were Marvin Greene’s lover.”
“Marvin’s dead.”
“Suicide,” Poelzig said, “Icarus flying too close to the sun.”
“What was his prize?” I asked.
“He’s dead. Does it matter?”
I said, “It matters to me.”
Poelzeg shook his head derisively, “Is that why you’re here? All this just to win an answer to a silly little question?”
“That’s not what I want, but I’d like to know just the same.”
He waved my question away and began to shuffle the Old Deck again. “The rules are this, I draw a card, you draw a card. The higher card wins the round. You keep your card and we begin again until the cards are gone. You win you get our prize. You lose…” he pointed to the Attendants, “and they get you.”
The absurdity was almost too much to bear, the simplest of games turned into a matter of life and death. I watched his hands as they cut and recut the deck, I knew the tricks for stacking a deck. It looked like he was playing fair.
Poelzeg set the deck down between us, “I’ll begin.”
He drew the top card uncovering a divided shape that looked like two faces connected at the center, perfectly reflecting each other. This was the fifth suit of the Old Deck, the sign of Korvylar, the Void-Harbinger.
My draw was next, the card felt cold and metallic to the touch. My fingertips tingled after I set it down, exposing a jagged, circular glyph an insectile eye. This was the first card, Zyvrathul- the Veilweaver. It was early in the game but I still felt a tremor of fear, not the fear of dying but the fear of losing.
My expression must have been obvious because Poelzig began to smirk. “Too late to turn back now.”
“I wouldn’t miss this for the world,” I said. “Tell me what he asked for.”
“Do you think it will help you?” He selected his next card from the top of the deck. It was Xyrlith, the Abbess of Murmurs, the second suit symbolized as a fluid angular mouth-like symbol.
“Are you afraid to tell me?”
Poelzeg tapped the deck, “Draw or default.”
My card was the sixth suit, Thranok, the Desolate Conflux, a series of concentric circles, each containing an arcane spiral.
“An even score in the second round,” he said. “A rarity.”
“How was Marvin doing at this point?”
He chuckled, “Are you always this tenacious? No wonder you’ve come from such a lowly background to make such a fortune.”
That stung a little, I stung back. “We can’t all inherit our wealth. Such a tragedy your parents died so young.”
Despite the provocation his voice softened, “He was winning by now, a score of thirteen.”
That was Marvin all right. Always lucky until he wasn’t. “What did he ask for?”
Poelzeg smiled wickedly, “His third card.”
I mirrored his smile, “His prize. What was his prize? Maybe I want the same thing.”
“Oh,” he laughed, “I doubt that.”
“Why?”
Rather than responding, he proceeded to draw his next card, unveiling the eleventh suit known as Drak'mor, the Abyssal Chariot. This card depicted a cosmic wheel with galaxies arranged as spokes. “Oh dear. That’s eighteen to seven.”
There were only two cards left, the fourth and twelfth suit. One life and one death. My hand hovered over the deck but I dropped it back, “What did he want?”
He threw up his arms, “If I tell you will you finish the game?”
I nodded. The sooner this was over the better.
Poelzeg leaned in conspiratorially, “He wanted to know always know the odds.”
“The odds?” I said, “That’s all?”
He nodded solemnly. "And that is precisely what he received - complete and utter revelation. He knew the result of every coin flip, dice roll, and outcome you could imagine.”
I heard Marvin’s voice in my head, louder than the hum of the fans, louder than the rustling of the flag, louder even than the impossible machine-like roar that churned around us.
“We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
I drew my final card, Sylthara Who Bleeds at the Threshold, a line, a cross, and a curve that somehow resolved itself into a peculiar and human-like shape. The twelfth card.
And just like that, I had won. Visibly disappointed, the new Attendants slunk back to the other side of the room. Poelzeg stared at me with amusement.
“Lucky, lucky. Must be how you survived in the entertainment industry.” He waited for retaliation, but I simply looked away and turned over the last card of the deck to reveal the fourth suit of the Old Deck - Ithryndra, the Conduit of Divine Grace.
"I was supposed to do that," Poelzeg remarked.
Leaning forward, I added, "They say Ithyranda’s followers gain the gift of immortality."
His eyes sparked with interest. "Is that what you desire?"
Resting my hand on my chin, I pretended to ponder. "It depends on the true meaning of immortality."
Poelzeg huffed, "Immortality means immortality."
"You must be aware of the drawbacks," I pressed, a note of accusation creeping into my words.
"I can’t say."
"Can't or won't?" I inquired.
Poelzeg's smile wavered. "What are you going on about? Claim your prize."
"Marvin loved to cheat," I explained, "cheat at cards, cheat at business, he even cheated on me."
Poelzeg snorted, "I can't imagine why."
"He believed his Prize would make everything easy, but he received more than that, didn't he?" I continued. "You mentioned that he saw everything, every possible outcome. He didn't just know the result of each poker hand; he knew the odds of the dealer getting cancer, of the player next to him cheating on their spouse. He couldn't even walk down the street without knowing the probability of the man on the sidewalk turning left or right."
"So?" I persisted, my voice unwavering.
Poelzeg sighed, "So what?"
"You could have warned him, but it amused you not to," I accused. "What will happen to the others who played tonight?" I inquired.
"I've answered enough questions," Poelzeg replied.
I leaned back in my seat, contemplating immortality, wealth, forbidden wisdom, and hidden worlds. I had the power to choose anything I desired.
But then, memories of that fateful night in Singapore flooded my mind.
Poelzeg's eyes narrowed, his patience running thin. "What. Is. Your. Prize?"
A smile spread across my face.
Section Six
When it was over, I sat alone at the table with the Old Deck. The sounds of the Engines of Creation were fading now. I wondered what the Old Deck had originally been meant to do. What strange alchemy had it been meant to work? Surely nothing like the Poelzeg Experience. Even the Nine Rebel Sermons had been unclear on that point, only saying that ”Each disciple of Ezerhodden reverently received their sacred card, clutching it tightly to their bosom, and embarked upon a solemn pilgrimage into the Verge to smite the children of Mazzikin…”
I began to shuffle the deck; there was something about the feel of those cards in your hand that made you have to shuffle them. And with each motion of my fingers, the sensation became more pleasurable. In my mind's eye, I saw how each of the missing cards had been destroyed: the first during a clandestine gathering of scholars in an ancient library, the second during a midnight ritual in a desolate cemetery during the 17th century, the third during the 19th-century Arctic expedition led by Captain John Franklin during a desperate performance of the Rite of Edgagor, and the fifth lost in the ruins of Tunguska. I saw the Old Deck travel the world, from a temple shrine in the Babylonian city of Kish to the bedside of Cesare Borgia to the offices of Charles Poelzeg.
Then I looked up and saw the woman in the green dress standing before me. Up close, I could see the thick pancake makeup, rouge, and eyeliner she wore. Only her lips were bare of cosmetics, and they were thin and bloodless. Despite the fact that I knew her face was flesh and blood, there was still something about her that made me think she was wearing a mask.
I handed her the Old Deck and then allowed one of the Attendants to deliver me back to the airport.
From there, my life settled into a quiet monotony. I got older, I got richer. I got married, I got divorced. I committed crimes, I avoided jail. And today, I find myself in a summer home transformed into a hospice, talking to the most foolish of my nephews.
My sources tell me you’re a horrible gambler. How much of your wife’s money have you lost over the last two years? A little over a million? A little less? If you get on that plane to Columbia you’ll lose more. The greedy stooges behind your invitation are counting on it.
The sources that mentioned your vulnerability also informed me of the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. During the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
that there's a statue of the Seventh Barishamada at the center of this casino slash amusement park you’ll be going to. It is over twenty feet tall and made of brass. They tell me that on the last night of the Festival, a bonfire is lit beneath it and the air fills with screams and smoke.
The same sources that revealed your vulnerability also provided me with details about this upcoming venture. They mentioned the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino slash amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. I've been informed that during the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
Hear me out. Don’t go. Your wife and children will burn and you will be reduced to a toothless, hairless ruin aged beyond their years.
Good. If you want to win something back, aim to reclaim your heart and soul. Be more than just a swindler and a gullible gambler.
Now, it's time for you to go. I've been told I don't have much time left, and I'd rather spend it in peace in my garden with my duck pond.
As for my Prize, I thought about other temptations like money, power, or second chances. But what I truly wanted is what I received my hands around Charles Poelzeg’s throat.
END TRANSCRIPT
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2023.12.01 15:11 ChannelAb3 THE POLZEIG EXPERIENCE Part two

PREVIOUS PART
​
Despite my aches and pains, I had no problem sleeping that night. There were dreams again, but this time they were vivid and memorable. They were filled with distorted images of a grand staircase descending into the unknown, walls bending inward, and open doors leading to revealed nothing but shadows. But one hallway drew me in, its yellow curtains swaying lazily. With each step further down the hall, the curtains moved and rippled more, and I began to hear a humming that came from either behind the veil of fabric or perhaps the fabric itself. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch the curtains; the material was damp and warm to the touch. Strange yet familiar symbols flitted out from where my fingers had brushed the fabric. The static music rose up, filling my mind with names from the lost cards of the Old Deck - Zyvrathul, Grythar, Vyraska, Astrylith.
Finally, inevitably, the hallway brought me to a dead-end alcove. That was where Marvin was waiting for me. He sat at a table with a revolver in his hand.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Waiting for you,” he answered.
“Why did you do it?”
He placed the revolver to his head, “Because I won.”
Mercifully, I woke up before he pulled the trigger.
At around ten in the morning, an Attendant delivered me a paper plate covered with warm Eggo waffles and a cup of tepid water. When I asked for seconds of both, they happily brought them to me. Six hours later, I was brought a thermos of coffee, a bag lunch containing a sandwich, and an apple. I asked if there was anything to read, and they brought me Volume 71 of Reader’s Digest condensed books. It was all I needed to pass the time until sunset.
I was almost finished with the first book in the volume when the Attendant came to fetch me. This time when I entered the Yellow Tent, I was given a square of paper and a miniature pencil. One side of the paper was a tally of my baccarat winnings, the other was blank. I ended up standing in line next to the Self-Made Millionaire. “All this… nonsense,” he said. “The Old Deck is in the hands of a lunatic.”
“What’s left of the Old Deck, you mean,” someone else commented.
I kept my silence; there were Attendants everywhere, and I knew one of them must have heard. Let someone else find visitors in their trailer tonight.
And besides, in all my studies about the Old Deck, I’d never heard of a single innocent or rational soul having it in their possession. The previous owner of the Old Deck had been a ruthless harridan who made her fortune in real estate and was supposedly secretly involved in the death of Evelyn McHale and the establishment of the National Prayer Breakfast.
It was open seating in the Yellow Tent. I chose the third row of the right corner and settled in, the pencil and paper resting on one knee. This time the suit depicted hanging over the stage depicted two symbolic figures intertwined in an otherworldly dance. This was the ninth card of the Old Deck, the sign of the Tearer of Realms.
The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped onto the stage and instructed us that we would be given three minutes to make our choice, and then the slips of paper and pencils would be collected. She further explained that we could either bet nothing at all, all our winnings, or Wager for the Deck. We were also instructed to mark down our competitor of choice as clearly as possible. Then she clapped her hands twice, and six of the Attendants filed out onto the stage, each wearing a medallion with a number around their chest.
I thought of the Owner of a Regional Supermarket Chain and the other losers from last night, their fortunes lost and their futures uncertain. I imagined them traveling home, both disappointed and relieved to have been spared this choice.
Nothing at all. All my winnings. Wager for the Deck.
What would the others be deciding for? I was sure the majority would choose the first option. Some had already lost enough. Some had won enough. And I am sure a select few just wanted to see the grotesquerie to follow.
But undoubtedly greed would drive a number of the people seated around me to risk all their winnings for the chance of an 80% payout.
Only a few of us would be mad enough to Wager for the Deck.
That decision had already been made for me; it had been made for me the day I received Marvin’s posthumous letter. All I had to worry over was which of the six Attendants to choose. I stared at each of them, trying to guess who the winner would be, and was immediately frustrated. When it came to Baccarat, I had my wits and skill to get me ahead, but now all I had to rely on was luck, and as you know, I am no fan of luck.
It was then that I noticed that Attendant number five was the broken-nosed one. After a moment’s consideration, I wrote their number down. After three minutes had passed, Attendants began to file through the rows of seats and collect our bets
They made us wait a little longer before the Mistress of Ceremonies began to walk back and forth so everyone could get a good look at the revolver she was holding. She inserted five bullets into the cylinder and gave it a spin before clicking it firmly shut.
The Attendants began to sing, six dry voices keening as one, “Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now am found was blind but now I see-”
BLAM!
We all flinched in our seats at the sound. Attendant One crumpled to the floor, a smoldering wound in the back of their head. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on to the next.
“T’was Grace that taught my heart to fear. And Grace, my fears relieved. How precious did that grace appear. The hour I first believed-“
BLAM!
Attendant Two made a tiny gulping sound and pitched forward. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on.
“Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come; 'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home-”
BLAM!
Down went Attendant Three. We had grown used the sound now. Some of the audience leaned forward in their seats, eager and terrified, others slumped back, their posture and expression betraying the depths of their loss.
“The Lord has promised good to me. His word my hope secures. He will my shield and portion be. As long as life endures-”
BLAM!
Attendant Four dropped. A commotion broke out in the audience as the Smug High-Ranking Official tried to make a run for it. He went down in a swarm of black tuxedos and grasping liver-spotted hands.
“Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail. And mortal life shall cease. I shall possess within the veil. A life of joy and peace-”
Click.
An audible gasp went through us all. The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped over to the last of the Attendants.
“When we've been here ten thousand years. Bright shining as the sun. We've no less days to sing God's praise. Then when we've first begun.”
BLAM!
The sixth Attendant dropped. The game ended.
Section Five
I spent most of the next day relaxing and watching from my window as most of the guests of the Poelzig Experience left their trailers and headed home. I made a game of it, trying to guess by their posture and gait if they were leaving empty-handed or richer than before. The ones like me, the ones that had Wagered for the Deck and won were waiting for sunset, sitting in our trailers with bonbons and champagne.
And as for the ones that had wagered and lost? Their screams had been audible all morning but by my fifth glass of champagne, I had lost interest in such considerations. Time passed slowly and pleasantly, until sometime after lunch I laid my spinning head down on my pillow and imagined what Marvin had been doing at this point in the Experience. Had been drunk and relived like me or had he been worried? Was he still trying to decide what his winnings would be or did he know what he wanted? Had he wished I was there?
As I drifted off to sleep I remembered our last conversation. I’d asked him why he’d stopped gambling and he’d said, “We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
The knock on my door woke me up, it was time. The Attendant that greeted me was unfamiliar, they offered me a friendly grin. I asked the for a cigarette, of course, they had one. I enjoyed it, taking my time as they led me to the Yellow Tent. I found myself at the end of the line, which was exactly where I wanted to be. I found myself standing next to the Well-Dressed Movie Star. “You made it,” he said, his voice emotionless.
“Excited?” I made a quick count of who was left. There were eleven in all, eleven mad fools waiting for a chance to take control of the Engines of Creation, if only for a moment. No one had been allowed in yet.
“I just…” he glanced over to the side of the old barn where a trio of Attendants were hard at work digging a deep trench into the ground. Despite the dirt and the sweaty labor they still had their tuxedos on. The bodies of Attendants One, Two, Three, Four, and Six were lying nearby. “I just want this to be over.”
“Losing your nerve?” I asked.
“I could lose everything.”
And that was true. The first of us was ushered inside, I didn’t recognize the player and when they left the tent some time later they were cracking with joy. “Mine mine mine!” they shouted to the stars. The next player was ushered inside and it continued. It wasn’t until the third player entered the tent that we heard a scream. A few minutes later, a lifeless body was brought out; it was the Self-Made Millionaire, still dripping with blood as they were unceremoniously deposited into the freshly dug trench.
It took over two hours for the line to simply reach its halfway point but that was to be expected. After all, there was only one Deck, there was only one Charles Poelzig and unlike previous holders of the Old Deck, he wanted to play each game personally.
When it was the Well-Dressed Movie Star's turn, six out of the eleven among us had already been placed in the trench. It was impossible not to observe that one of them had been feebly struggling as they were thrown in.
He turned to me as one of the Attendants took him by the elbow, “Pray for me.”
And I had to laugh, how could anyone hope for a merciful God at a time like this?
The minutes ticked by, and uncertainty hung heavy in the air. I wondered to myself how many of the people who had come here truly understood what the Old Deck was, who understood that each card represented a being described in the Nine Rebel Sermons as ”Exalted beyond the realm of mortals, yet humbled by mortal frailty, bearing an essence both divine and earthly.”
When the Smartly-Dressed Movie Star left the tent thirty minutes later his head was held high. He flashed me a grin, “If you make it out call me.”
Then it was my turn.
I entered the tent to see the only table left standing was the one Charles Poelzig had chosen to sit at, and two chairs were placed on either side of it. The flagpole and its fan stood undisturbed. A new flag hung from it and upon the green fabric was the image of a series of overlapping, enigmatic symbols that brought to mind the image of something being torn apart. This was the suit of the Devourer of Visions the tenth card of the Old Deck In front of it were the five defeated players from last night’s game, heads shaven and mouths wired shut. They all had knives in their hands and their brand-new tuxedos were stained with the blood of the gamblers sent to the trench outside.
Near the opposite side of tent Attendant #5 sat on a makeshift throne made from three chairs stacked atop one another. They wore a paper crown on their head and ill-filling clothes that had been salvaged from one of the new Attendants. There was a metal briefcase on their lap. There was a look in their eyes that made me think of the expression a prisoner must have after being released from a long sentence.
With every step I took closer to Charles Poelzig the louder the sound of machinery became, the grinding metal being worked by a thousand gears and motors. A taste like rust filled my mouth. It was loudest when I took my seat, even now I couldn’t tell you if the sound was coming from beneath him or from him.
He glanced up from shuffling the seven remaining cards of the Old Deck. They were made of copper, and the faces of each held a symbol from a witch language birthed in the Screaming Nowhere. On the back of each was the sign of Ezerhodden. “You want the cards?” He asked.
“Why else would I be here?” I said.
The five freshly anointed Attendants moved to stand behind me, their knives at the ready. Poelzig smiled at me, “You were Marvin Greene’s lover.”
“Marvin’s dead.”
“Suicide,” Poelzig said, “Icarus flying too close to the sun.”
“What was his prize?” I asked.
“He’s dead. Does it matter?”
I said, “It matters to me.”
Poelzeg shook his head derisively, “Is that why you’re here? All this just to win an answer to a silly little question?”
“That’s not what I want, but I’d like to know just the same.”
He waved my question away and began to shuffle the Old Deck again. “The rules are this, I draw a card, you draw a card. The higher card wins the round. You keep your card and we begin again until the cards are gone. You win you get our prize. You lose…” he pointed to the Attendants, “and they get you.”
The absurdity was almost too much to bear, the simplest of games turned into a matter of life and death. I watched his hands as they cut and recut the deck, I knew the tricks for stacking a deck. It looked like he was playing fair.
Poelzeg set the deck down between us, “I’ll begin.”
He drew the top card uncovering a divided shape that looked like two faces connected at the center, perfectly reflecting each other. This was the fifth suit of the Old Deck, the sign of Korvylar, the Void-Harbinger.
My draw was next, the card felt cold and metallic to the touch. My fingertips tingled after I set it down, exposing a jagged, circular glyph an insectile eye. This was the first card, Zyvrathul- the Veilweaver. It was early in the game but I still felt a tremor of fear, not the fear of dying but the fear of losing.
My expression must have been obvious because Poelzig began to smirk. “Too late to turn back now.”
“I wouldn’t miss this for the world,” I said. “Tell me what he asked for.”
“Do you think it will help you?” He selected his next card from the top of the deck. It was Xyrlith, the Abbess of Murmurs, the second suit symbolized as a fluid angular mouth-like symbol.
“Are you afraid to tell me?”
Poelzeg tapped the deck, “Draw or default.”
My card was the sixth suit, Thranok, the Desolate Conflux, a series of concentric circles, each containing an arcane spiral.
“An even score in the second round,” he said. “A rarity.”
“How was Marvin doing at this point?”
He chuckled, “Are you always this tenacious? No wonder you’ve come from such a lowly background to make such a fortune.”
That stung a little, I stung back. “We can’t all inherit our wealth. Such a tragedy your parents died so young.”
Despite the provocation his voice softened, “He was winning by now, a score of thirteen.”
That was Marvin all right. Always lucky until he wasn’t. “What did he ask for?”
Poelzeg smiled wickedly, “His third card.”
I mirrored his smile, “His prize. What was his prize? Maybe I want the same thing.”
“Oh,” he laughed, “I doubt that.”
“Why?”
Rather than responding, he proceeded to draw his next card, unveiling the eleventh suit known as Drak'mor, the Abyssal Chariot. This card depicted a cosmic wheel with galaxies arranged as spokes. “Oh dear. That’s eighteen to seven.”
There were only two cards left, the fourth and twelfth suit. One life and one death. My hand hovered over the deck but I dropped it back, “What did he want?”
He threw up his arms, “If I tell you will you finish the game?”
I nodded. The sooner this was over the better.
Poelzeg leaned in conspiratorially, “He wanted to know always know the odds.”
“The odds?” I said, “That’s all?”
He nodded solemnly. "And that is precisely what he received - complete and utter revelation. He knew the result of every coin flip, dice roll, and outcome you could imagine.”
I heard Marvin’s voice in my head, louder than the hum of the fans, louder than the rustling of the flag, louder even than the impossible machine-like roar that churned around us.
“We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
I drew my final card, Sylthara Who Bleeds at the Threshold, a line, a cross, and a curve that somehow resolved itself into a peculiar and human-like shape. The twelfth card.
And just like that, I had won. Visibly disappointed, the new Attendants slunk back to the other side of the room. Poelzeg stared at me with amusement.
“Lucky, lucky. Must be how you survived in the entertainment industry.” He waited for retaliation, but I simply looked away and turned over the last card of the deck to reveal the fourth suit of the Old Deck - Ithryndra, the Conduit of Divine Grace.
"I was supposed to do that," Poelzeg remarked.
Leaning forward, I added, "They say Ithyranda’s followers gain the gift of immortality."
His eyes sparked with interest. "Is that what you desire?"
Resting my hand on my chin, I pretended to ponder. "It depends on the true meaning of immortality."
Poelzeg huffed, "Immortality means immortality."
"You must be aware of the drawbacks," I pressed, a note of accusation creeping into my words.
"I can’t say."
"Can't or won't?" I inquired.
Poelzeg's smile wavered. "What are you going on about? Claim your prize."
"Marvin loved to cheat," I explained, "cheat at cards, cheat at business, he even cheated on me."
Poelzeg snorted, "I can't imagine why."
"He believed his Prize would make everything easy, but he received more than that, didn't he?" I continued. "You mentioned that he saw everything, every possible outcome. He didn't just know the result of each poker hand; he knew the odds of the dealer getting cancer, of the player next to him cheating on their spouse. He couldn't even walk down the street without knowing the probability of the man on the sidewalk turning left or right."
"So?" I persisted, my voice unwavering.
Poelzeg sighed, "So what?"
"You could have warned him, but it amused you not to," I accused. "What will happen to the others who played tonight?" I inquired.
"I've answered enough questions," Poelzeg replied.
I leaned back in my seat, contemplating immortality, wealth, forbidden wisdom, and hidden worlds. I had the power to choose anything I desired.
But then, memories of that fateful night in Singapore flooded my mind.
Poelzeg's eyes narrowed, his patience running thin. "What. Is. Your. Prize?"
A smile spread across my face.
Section Six
When it was over, I sat alone at the table with the Old Deck. The sounds of the Engines of Creation were fading now. I wondered what the Old Deck had originally been meant to do. What strange alchemy had it been meant to work? Surely nothing like the Poelzeg Experience. Even the Nine Rebel Sermons had been unclear on that point, only saying that ”Each disciple of Ezerhodden reverently received their sacred card, clutching it tightly to their bosom, and embarked upon a solemn pilgrimage into the Verge to smite the children of Mazzikin…”
I began to shuffle the deck; there was something about the feel of those cards in your hand that made you have to shuffle them. And with each motion of my fingers, the sensation became more pleasurable. In my mind's eye, I saw how each of the missing cards had been destroyed: the first during a clandestine gathering of scholars in an ancient library, the second during a midnight ritual in a desolate cemetery during the 17th century, the third during the 19th-century Arctic expedition led by Captain John Franklin during a desperate performance of the Rite of Edgagor, and the fifth lost in the ruins of Tunguska. I saw the Old Deck travel the world, from a temple shrine in the Babylonian city of Kish to the bedside of Cesare Borgia to the offices of Charles Poelzeg.
Then I looked up and saw the woman in the green dress standing before me. Up close, I could see the thick pancake makeup, rouge, and eyeliner she wore. Only her lips were bare of cosmetics, and they were thin and bloodless. Despite the fact that I knew her face was flesh and blood, there was still something about her that made me think she was wearing a mask.
I handed her the Old Deck and then allowed one of the Attendants to deliver me back to the airport.
From there, my life settled into a quiet monotony. I got older, I got richer. I got married, I got divorced. I committed crimes, I avoided jail. And today, I find myself in a summer home transformed into a hospice, talking to the most foolish of my nephews.
My sources tell me you’re a horrible gambler. How much of your wife’s money have you lost over the last two years? A little over a million? A little less? If you get on that plane to Columbia you’ll lose more. The greedy stooges behind your invitation are counting on it.
The sources that mentioned your vulnerability also informed me of the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. During the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
that there's a statue of the Seventh Barishamada at the center of this casino slash amusement park you’ll be going to. It is over twenty feet tall and made of brass. They tell me that on the last night of the Festival, a bonfire is lit beneath it and the air fills with screams and smoke.
The same sources that revealed your vulnerability also provided me with details about this upcoming venture. They mentioned the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino slash amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. I've been informed that during the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
Hear me out. Don’t go. Your wife and children will burn and you will be reduced to a toothless, hairless ruin aged beyond their years.
Good. If you want to win something back, aim to reclaim your heart and soul. Be more than just a swindler and a gullible gambler.
Now, it's time for you to go. I've been told I don't have much time left, and I'd rather spend it in peace in my garden with my duck pond.
As for my Prize, I thought about other temptations like money, power, or second chances. But what I truly wanted is what I received my hands around Charles Poelzeg’s throat.
END TRANSCRIPT
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2023.12.01 15:07 ChannelAb3 THE POLZEIG EXPERIENCE part two

PREVIOUS PART
​
Despite my aches and pains, I had no problem sleeping that night. There were dreams again, but this time they were vivid and memorable. They were filled with distorted images of a grand staircase descending into the unknown, walls bending inward, and open doors leading to revealed nothing but shadows. But one hallway drew me in, its yellow curtains swaying lazily. With each step further down the hall, the curtains moved and rippled more, and I began to hear a humming that came from either behind the veil of fabric or perhaps the fabric itself. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch the curtains; the material was damp and warm to the touch. Strange yet familiar symbols flitted out from where my fingers had brushed the fabric. The static music rose up, filling my mind with names from the lost cards of the Old Deck - Zyvrathul, Grythar, Vyraska, Astrylith.
Finally, inevitably, the hallway brought me to a dead-end alcove. That was where Marvin was waiting for me. He sat at a table with a revolver in his hand.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Waiting for you,” he answered.
“Why did you do it?”
He placed the revolver to his head, “Because I won.”
Mercifully, I woke up before he pulled the trigger.
At around ten in the morning, an Attendant delivered me a paper plate covered with warm Eggo waffles and a cup of tepid water. When I asked for seconds of both, they happily brought them to me. Six hours later, I was brought a thermos of coffee, a bag lunch containing a sandwich, and an apple. I asked if there was anything to read, and they brought me Volume 71 of Reader’s Digest condensed books. It was all I needed to pass the time until sunset.
I was almost finished with the first book in the volume when the Attendant came to fetch me. This time when I entered the Yellow Tent, I was given a square of paper and a miniature pencil. One side of the paper was a tally of my baccarat winnings, the other was blank. I ended up standing in line next to the Self-Made Millionaire. “All this… nonsense,” he said. “The Old Deck is in the hands of a lunatic.”
“What’s left of the Old Deck, you mean,” someone else commented.
I kept my silence; there were Attendants everywhere, and I knew one of them must have heard. Let someone else find visitors in their trailer tonight.
And besides, in all my studies about the Old Deck, I’d never heard of a single innocent or rational soul having it in their possession. The previous owner of the Old Deck had been a ruthless harridan who made her fortune in real estate and was supposedly secretly involved in the death of Evelyn McHale and the establishment of the National Prayer Breakfast.
It was open seating in the Yellow Tent. I chose the third row of the right corner and settled in, the pencil and paper resting on one knee. This time the suit depicted hanging over the stage depicted two symbolic figures intertwined in an otherworldly dance. This was the ninth card of the Old Deck, the sign of the Tearer of Realms.
The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped onto the stage and instructed us that we would be given three minutes to make our choice, and then the slips of paper and pencils would be collected. She further explained that we could either bet nothing at all, all our winnings, or Wager for the Deck. We were also instructed to mark down our competitor of choice as clearly as possible. Then she clapped her hands twice, and six of the Attendants filed out onto the stage, each wearing a medallion with a number around their chest.
I thought of the Owner of a Regional Supermarket Chain and the other losers from last night, their fortunes lost and their futures uncertain. I imagined them traveling home, both disappointed and relieved to have been spared this choice.
Nothing at all. All my winnings. Wager for the Deck.
What would the others be deciding for? I was sure the majority would choose the first option. Some had already lost enough. Some had won enough. And I am sure a select few just wanted to see the grotesquerie to follow.
But undoubtedly greed would drive a number of the people seated around me to risk all their winnings for the chance of an 80% payout.
Only a few of us would be mad enough to Wager for the Deck.
That decision had already been made for me; it had been made for me the day I received Marvin’s posthumous letter. All I had to worry over was which of the six Attendants to choose. I stared at each of them, trying to guess who the winner would be, and was immediately frustrated. When it came to Baccarat, I had my wits and skill to get me ahead, but now all I had to rely on was luck, and as you know, I am no fan of luck.
It was then that I noticed that Attendant number five was the broken-nosed one. After a moment’s consideration, I wrote their number down. After three minutes had passed, Attendants began to file through the rows of seats and collect our bets
They made us wait a little longer before the Mistress of Ceremonies began to walk back and forth so everyone could get a good look at the revolver she was holding. She inserted five bullets into the cylinder and gave it a spin before clicking it firmly shut.
The Attendants began to sing, six dry voices keening as one, “Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now am found was blind but now I see-”
BLAM!
We all flinched in our seats at the sound. Attendant One crumpled to the floor, a smoldering wound in the back of their head. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on to the next.
“T’was Grace that taught my heart to fear. And Grace, my fears relieved. How precious did that grace appear. The hour I first believed-“
BLAM!
Attendant Two made a tiny gulping sound and pitched forward. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on.
“Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come; 'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home-”
BLAM!
Down went Attendant Three. We had grown used the sound now. Some of the audience leaned forward in their seats, eager and terrified, others slumped back, their posture and expression betraying the depths of their loss.
“The Lord has promised good to me. His word my hope secures. He will my shield and portion be. As long as life endures-”
BLAM!
Attendant Four dropped. A commotion broke out in the audience as the Smug High-Ranking Official tried to make a run for it. He went down in a swarm of black tuxedos and grasping liver-spotted hands.
“Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail. And mortal life shall cease. I shall possess within the veil. A life of joy and peace-”
Click.
An audible gasp went through us all. The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped over to the last of the Attendants.
“When we've been here ten thousand years. Bright shining as the sun. We've no less days to sing God's praise. Then when we've first begun.”
BLAM!
The sixth Attendant dropped. The game ended.
Section Five
I spent most of the next day relaxing and watching from my window as most of the guests of the Poelzig Experience left their trailers and headed home. I made a game of it, trying to guess by their posture and gait if they were leaving empty-handed or richer than before. The ones like me, the ones that had Wagered for the Deck and won were waiting for sunset, sitting in our trailers with bonbons and champagne.
And as for the ones that had wagered and lost? Their screams had been audible all morning but by my fifth glass of champagne, I had lost interest in such considerations. Time passed slowly and pleasantly, until sometime after lunch I laid my spinning head down on my pillow and imagined what Marvin had been doing at this point in the Experience. Had been drunk and relived like me or had he been worried? Was he still trying to decide what his winnings would be or did he know what he wanted? Had he wished I was there?
As I drifted off to sleep I remembered our last conversation. I’d asked him why he’d stopped gambling and he’d said, “We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
The knock on my door woke me up, it was time. The Attendant that greeted me was unfamiliar, they offered me a friendly grin. I asked the for a cigarette, of course, they had one. I enjoyed it, taking my time as they led me to the Yellow Tent. I found myself at the end of the line, which was exactly where I wanted to be. I found myself standing next to the Well-Dressed Movie Star. “You made it,” he said, his voice emotionless.
“Excited?” I made a quick count of who was left. There were eleven in all, eleven mad fools waiting for a chance to take control of the Engines of Creation, if only for a moment. No one had been allowed in yet.
“I just…” he glanced over to the side of the old barn where a trio of Attendants were hard at work digging a deep trench into the ground. Despite the dirt and the sweaty labor they still had their tuxedos on. The bodies of Attendants One, Two, Three, Four, and Six were lying nearby. “I just want this to be over.”
“Losing your nerve?” I asked.
“I could lose everything.”
And that was true. The first of us was ushered inside, I didn’t recognize the player and when they left the tent some time later they were cracking with joy. “Mine mine mine!” they shouted to the stars. The next player was ushered inside and it continued. It wasn’t until the third player entered the tent that we heard a scream. A few minutes later, a lifeless body was brought out; it was the Self-Made Millionaire, still dripping with blood as they were unceremoniously deposited into the freshly dug trench.
It took over two hours for the line to simply reach its halfway point but that was to be expected. After all, there was only one Deck, there was only one Charles Poelzig and unlike previous holders of the Old Deck, he wanted to play each game personally.
When it was the Well-Dressed Movie Star's turn, six out of the eleven among us had already been placed in the trench. It was impossible not to observe that one of them had been feebly struggling as they were thrown in.
He turned to me as one of the Attendants took him by the elbow, “Pray for me.”
And I had to laugh, how could anyone hope for a merciful God at a time like this?
The minutes ticked by, and uncertainty hung heavy in the air. I wondered to myself how many of the people who had come here truly understood what the Old Deck was, who understood that each card represented a being described in the Nine Rebel Sermons as ”Exalted beyond the realm of mortals, yet humbled by mortal frailty, bearing an essence both divine and earthly.”
When the Smartly-Dressed Movie Star left the tent thirty minutes later his head was held high. He flashed me a grin, “If you make it out call me.”
Then it was my turn.
I entered the tent to see the only table left standing was the one Charles Poelzig had chosen to sit at, and two chairs were placed on either side of it. The flagpole and its fan stood undisturbed. A new flag hung from it and upon the green fabric was the image of a series of overlapping, enigmatic symbols that brought to mind the image of something being torn apart. This was the suit of the Devourer of Visions the tenth card of the Old Deck In front of it were the five defeated players from last night’s game, heads shaven and mouths wired shut. They all had knives in their hands and their brand-new tuxedos were stained with the blood of the gamblers sent to the trench outside.
Near the opposite side of tent Attendant #5 sat on a makeshift throne made from three chairs stacked atop one another. They wore a paper crown on their head and ill-filling clothes that had been salvaged from one of the new Attendants. There was a metal briefcase on their lap. There was a look in their eyes that made me think of the expression a prisoner must have after being released from a long sentence.
With every step I took closer to Charles Poelzig the louder the sound of machinery became, the grinding metal being worked by a thousand gears and motors. A taste like rust filled my mouth. It was loudest when I took my seat, even now I couldn’t tell you if the sound was coming from beneath him or from him.
He glanced up from shuffling the seven remaining cards of the Old Deck. They were made of copper, and the faces of each held a symbol from a witch language birthed in the Screaming Nowhere. On the back of each was the sign of Ezerhodden. “You want the cards?” He asked.
“Why else would I be here?” I said.
The five freshly anointed Attendants moved to stand behind me, their knives at the ready. Poelzig smiled at me, “You were Marvin Greene’s lover.”
“Marvin’s dead.”
“Suicide,” Poelzig said, “Icarus flying too close to the sun.”
“What was his prize?” I asked.
“He’s dead. Does it matter?”
I said, “It matters to me.”
Poelzeg shook his head derisively, “Is that why you’re here? All this just to win an answer to a silly little question?”
“That’s not what I want, but I’d like to know just the same.”
He waved my question away and began to shuffle the Old Deck again. “The rules are this, I draw a card, you draw a card. The higher card wins the round. You keep your card and we begin again until the cards are gone. You win you get our prize. You lose…” he pointed to the Attendants, “and they get you.”
The absurdity was almost too much to bear, the simplest of games turned into a matter of life and death. I watched his hands as they cut and recut the deck, I knew the tricks for stacking a deck. It looked like he was playing fair.
Poelzeg set the deck down between us, “I’ll begin.”
He drew the top card uncovering a divided shape that looked like two faces connected at the center, perfectly reflecting each other. This was the fifth suit of the Old Deck, the sign of Korvylar, the Void-Harbinger.
My draw was next, the card felt cold and metallic to the touch. My fingertips tingled after I set it down, exposing a jagged, circular glyph an insectile eye. This was the first card, Zyvrathul- the Veilweaver. It was early in the game but I still felt a tremor of fear, not the fear of dying but the fear of losing.
My expression must have been obvious because Poelzig began to smirk. “Too late to turn back now.”
“I wouldn’t miss this for the world,” I said. “Tell me what he asked for.”
“Do you think it will help you?” He selected his next card from the top of the deck. It was Xyrlith, the Abbess of Murmurs, the second suit symbolized as a fluid angular mouth-like symbol.
“Are you afraid to tell me?”
Poelzeg tapped the deck, “Draw or default.”
My card was the sixth suit, Thranok, the Desolate Conflux, a series of concentric circles, each containing an arcane spiral.
“An even score in the second round,” he said. “A rarity.”
“How was Marvin doing at this point?”
He chuckled, “Are you always this tenacious? No wonder you’ve come from such a lowly background to make such a fortune.”
That stung a little, I stung back. “We can’t all inherit our wealth. Such a tragedy your parents died so young.”
Despite the provocation his voice softened, “He was winning by now, a score of thirteen.”
That was Marvin all right. Always lucky until he wasn’t. “What did he ask for?”
Poelzeg smiled wickedly, “His third card.”
I mirrored his smile, “His prize. What was his prize? Maybe I want the same thing.”
“Oh,” he laughed, “I doubt that.”
“Why?”
Rather than responding, he proceeded to draw his next card, unveiling the eleventh suit known as Drak'mor, the Abyssal Chariot. This card depicted a cosmic wheel with galaxies arranged as spokes. “Oh dear. That’s eighteen to seven.”
There were only two cards left, the fourth and twelfth suit. One life and one death. My hand hovered over the deck but I dropped it back, “What did he want?”
He threw up his arms, “If I tell you will you finish the game?”
I nodded. The sooner this was over the better.
Poelzeg leaned in conspiratorially, “He wanted to know always know the odds.”
“The odds?” I said, “That’s all?”
He nodded solemnly. "And that is precisely what he received - complete and utter revelation. He knew the result of every coin flip, dice roll, and outcome you could imagine.”
I heard Marvin’s voice in my head, louder than the hum of the fans, louder than the rustling of the flag, louder even than the impossible machine-like roar that churned around us.
“We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
I drew my final card, Sylthara Who Bleeds at the Threshold, a line, a cross, and a curve that somehow resolved itself into a peculiar and human-like shape. The twelfth card.
And just like that, I had won. Visibly disappointed, the new Attendants slunk back to the other side of the room. Poelzeg stared at me with amusement.
“Lucky, lucky. Must be how you survived in the entertainment industry.” He waited for retaliation, but I simply looked away and turned over the last card of the deck to reveal the fourth suit of the Old Deck - Ithryndra, the Conduit of Divine Grace.
"I was supposed to do that," Poelzeg remarked.
Leaning forward, I added, "They say Ithyranda’s followers gain the gift of immortality."
His eyes sparked with interest. "Is that what you desire?"
Resting my hand on my chin, I pretended to ponder. "It depends on the true meaning of immortality."
Poelzeg huffed, "Immortality means immortality."
"You must be aware of the drawbacks," I pressed, a note of accusation creeping into my words.
"I can’t say."
"Can't or won't?" I inquired.
Poelzeg's smile wavered. "What are you going on about? Claim your prize."
"Marvin loved to cheat," I explained, "cheat at cards, cheat at business, he even cheated on me."
Poelzeg snorted, "I can't imagine why."
"He believed his Prize would make everything easy, but he received more than that, didn't he?" I continued. "You mentioned that he saw everything, every possible outcome. He didn't just know the result of each poker hand; he knew the odds of the dealer getting cancer, of the player next to him cheating on their spouse. He couldn't even walk down the street without knowing the probability of the man on the sidewalk turning left or right."
"So?" I persisted, my voice unwavering.
Poelzeg sighed, "So what?"
"You could have warned him, but it amused you not to," I accused. "What will happen to the others who played tonight?" I inquired.
"I've answered enough questions," Poelzeg replied.
I leaned back in my seat, contemplating immortality, wealth, forbidden wisdom, and hidden worlds. I had the power to choose anything I desired.
But then, memories of that fateful night in Singapore flooded my mind.
Poelzeg's eyes narrowed, his patience running thin. "What. Is. Your. Prize?"
A smile spread across my face.
Section Six
When it was over, I sat alone at the table with the Old Deck. The sounds of the Engines of Creation were fading now. I wondered what the Old Deck had originally been meant to do. What strange alchemy had it been meant to work? Surely nothing like the Poelzeg Experience. Even the Nine Rebel Sermons had been unclear on that point, only saying that ”Each disciple of Ezerhodden reverently received their sacred card, clutching it tightly to their bosom, and embarked upon a solemn pilgrimage into the Verge to smite the children of Mazzikin…”
I began to shuffle the deck; there was something about the feel of those cards in your hand that made you have to shuffle them. And with each motion of my fingers, the sensation became more pleasurable. In my mind's eye, I saw how each of the missing cards had been destroyed: the first during a clandestine gathering of scholars in an ancient library, the second during a midnight ritual in a desolate cemetery during the 17th century, the third during the 19th-century Arctic expedition led by Captain John Franklin during a desperate performance of the Rite of Edgagor, and the fifth lost in the ruins of Tunguska. I saw the Old Deck travel the world, from a temple shrine in the Babylonian city of Kish to the bedside of Cesare Borgia to the offices of Charles Poelzeg.
Then I looked up and saw the woman in the green dress standing before me. Up close, I could see the thick pancake makeup, rouge, and eyeliner she wore. Only her lips were bare of cosmetics, and they were thin and bloodless. Despite the fact that I knew her face was flesh and blood, there was still something about her that made me think she was wearing a mask.
I handed her the Old Deck and then allowed one of the Attendants to deliver me back to the airport.
From there, my life settled into a quiet monotony. I got older, I got richer. I got married, I got divorced. I committed crimes, I avoided jail. And today, I find myself in a summer home transformed into a hospice, talking to the most foolish of my nephews.
My sources tell me you’re a horrible gambler. How much of your wife’s money have you lost over the last two years? A little over a million? A little less? If you get on that plane to Columbia you’ll lose more. The greedy stooges behind your invitation are counting on it.
The sources that mentioned your vulnerability also informed me of the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. During the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
that there's a statue of the Seventh Barishamada at the center of this casino slash amusement park you’ll be going to. It is over twenty feet tall and made of brass. They tell me that on the last night of the Festival, a bonfire is lit beneath it and the air fills with screams and smoke.
The same sources that revealed your vulnerability also provided me with details about this upcoming venture. They mentioned the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino slash amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. I've been informed that during the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
Hear me out. Don’t go. Your wife and children will burn and you will be reduced to a toothless, hairless ruin aged beyond their years.
Good. If you want to win something back, aim to reclaim your heart and soul. Be more than just a swindler and a gullible gambler.
Now, it's time for you to go. I've been told I don't have much time left, and I'd rather spend it in peace in my garden with my duck pond.
As for my Prize, I thought about other temptations like money, power, or second chances. But what I truly wanted is what I received my hands around Charles Poelzeg’s throat.
END TRANSCRIPT
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2023.11.26 18:44 ChannelAb3 THE POLZEIG EXPERIENCE Part two

PREVIOUS PART
​
Despite my aches and pains, I had no problem sleeping that night. There were dreams again, but this time they were vivid and memorable. They were filled with distorted images of a grand staircase descending into the unknown, walls bending inward, and open doors leading to revealed nothing but shadows. But one hallway drew me in, its yellow curtains swaying lazily. With each step further down the hall, the curtains moved and rippled more, and I began to hear a humming that came from either behind the veil of fabric or perhaps the fabric itself. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch the curtains; the material was damp and warm to the touch. Strange yet familiar symbols flitted out from where my fingers had brushed the fabric. The static music rose up, filling my mind with names from the lost cards of the Old Deck - Zyvrathul, Grythar, Vyraska, Astrylith.
Finally, inevitably, the hallway brought me to a dead-end alcove. That was where Marvin was waiting for me. He sat at a table with a revolver in his hand.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Waiting for you,” he answered.
“Why did you do it?”
He placed the revolver to his head, “Because I won.”
Mercifully, I woke up before he pulled the trigger.
At around ten in the morning, an Attendant delivered me a paper plate covered with warm Eggo waffles and a cup of tepid water. When I asked for seconds of both, they happily brought them to me. Six hours later, I was brought a thermos of coffee, a bag lunch containing a sandwich, and an apple. I asked if there was anything to read, and they brought me Volume 71 of Reader’s Digest condensed books. It was all I needed to pass the time until sunset.
I was almost finished with the first book in the volume when the Attendant came to fetch me. This time when I entered the Yellow Tent, I was given a square of paper and a miniature pencil. One side of the paper was a tally of my baccarat winnings, the other was blank. I ended up standing in line next to the Self-Made Millionaire. “All this… nonsense,” he said. “The Old Deck is in the hands of a lunatic.”
“What’s left of the Old Deck, you mean,” someone else commented.
I kept my silence; there were Attendants everywhere, and I knew one of them must have heard. Let someone else find visitors in their trailer tonight.
And besides, in all my studies about the Old Deck, I’d never heard of a single innocent or rational soul having it in their possession. The previous owner of the Old Deck had been a ruthless harridan who made her fortune in real estate and was supposedly secretly involved in the death of Evelyn McHale and the establishment of the National Prayer Breakfast.
It was open seating in the Yellow Tent. I chose the third row of the right corner and settled in, the pencil and paper resting on one knee. This time the suit depicted hanging over the stage depicted two symbolic figures intertwined in an otherworldly dance. This was the ninth card of the Old Deck, the sign of the Tearer of Realms.
The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped onto the stage and instructed us that we would be given three minutes to make our choice, and then the slips of paper and pencils would be collected. She further explained that we could either bet nothing at all, all our winnings, or Wager for the Deck. We were also instructed to mark down our competitor of choice as clearly as possible. Then she clapped her hands twice, and six of the Attendants filed out onto the stage, each wearing a medallion with a number around their chest.
I thought of the Owner of a Regional Supermarket Chain and the other losers from last night, their fortunes lost and their futures uncertain. I imagined them traveling home, both disappointed and relieved to have been spared this choice.
Nothing at all. All my winnings. Wager for the Deck.
What would the others be deciding for? I was sure the majority would choose the first option. Some had already lost enough. Some had won enough. And I am sure a select few just wanted to see the grotesquerie to follow.
But undoubtedly greed would drive a number of the people seated around me to risk all their winnings for the chance of an 80% payout.
Only a few of us would be mad enough to Wager for the Deck.
That decision had already been made for me; it had been made for me the day I received Marvin’s posthumous letter. All I had to worry over was which of the six Attendants to choose. I stared at each of them, trying to guess who the winner would be, and was immediately frustrated. When it came to Baccarat, I had my wits and skill to get me ahead, but now all I had to rely on was luck, and as you know, I am no fan of luck.
It was then that I noticed that Attendant number five was the broken-nosed one. After a moment’s consideration, I wrote their number down. After three minutes had passed, Attendants began to file through the rows of seats and collect our bets
They made us wait a little longer before the Mistress of Ceremonies began to walk back and forth so everyone could get a good look at the revolver she was holding. She inserted five bullets into the cylinder and gave it a spin before clicking it firmly shut.
The Attendants began to sing, six dry voices keening as one, “Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now am found was blind but now I see-”
BLAM!
We all flinched in our seats at the sound. Attendant One crumpled to the floor, a smoldering wound in the back of their head. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on to the next.
“T’was Grace that taught my heart to fear. And Grace, my fears relieved. How precious did that grace appear. The hour I first believed-“
BLAM!
Attendant Two made a tiny gulping sound and pitched forward. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on.
“Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come; 'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home-”
BLAM!
Down went Attendant Three. We had grown used the sound now. Some of the audience leaned forward in their seats, eager and terrified, others slumped back, their posture and expression betraying the depths of their loss.
“The Lord has promised good to me. His word my hope secures. He will my shield and portion be. As long as life endures-”
BLAM!
Attendant Four dropped. A commotion broke out in the audience as the Smug High-Ranking Official tried to make a run for it. He went down in a swarm of black tuxedos and grasping liver-spotted hands.
“Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail. And mortal life shall cease. I shall possess within the veil. A life of joy and peace-”
Click.
An audible gasp went through us all. The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped over to the last of the Attendants.
“When we've been here ten thousand years. Bright shining as the sun. We've no less days to sing God's praise. Then when we've first begun.”
BLAM!
The sixth Attendant dropped. The game ended.
Section Five
I spent most of the next day relaxing and watching from my window as most of the guests of the Poelzig Experience left their trailers and headed home. I made a game of it, trying to guess by their posture and gait if they were leaving empty-handed or richer than before. The ones like me, the ones that had Wagered for the Deck and won were waiting for sunset, sitting in our trailers with bonbons and champagne.
And as for the ones that had wagered and lost? Their screams had been audible all morning but by my fifth glass of champagne, I had lost interest in such considerations. Time passed slowly and pleasantly, until sometime after lunch I laid my spinning head down on my pillow and imagined what Marvin had been doing at this point in the Experience. Had been drunk and relived like me or had he been worried? Was he still trying to decide what his winnings would be or did he know what he wanted? Had he wished I was there?
As I drifted off to sleep I remembered our last conversation. I’d asked him why he’d stopped gambling and he’d said, “We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
The knock on my door woke me up, it was time. The Attendant that greeted me was unfamiliar, they offered me a friendly grin. I asked the for a cigarette, of course, they had one. I enjoyed it, taking my time as they led me to the Yellow Tent. I found myself at the end of the line, which was exactly where I wanted to be. I found myself standing next to the Well-Dressed Movie Star. “You made it,” he said, his voice emotionless.
“Excited?” I made a quick count of who was left. There were eleven in all, eleven mad fools waiting for a chance to take control of the Engines of Creation, if only for a moment. No one had been allowed in yet.
“I just…” he glanced over to the side of the old barn where a trio of Attendants were hard at work digging a deep trench into the ground. Despite the dirt and the sweaty labor they still had their tuxedos on. The bodies of Attendants One, Two, Three, Four, and Six were lying nearby. “I just want this to be over.”
“Losing your nerve?” I asked.
“I could lose everything.”
And that was true. The first of us was ushered inside, I didn’t recognize the player and when they left the tent some time later they were cracking with joy. “Mine mine mine!” they shouted to the stars. The next player was ushered inside and it continued. It wasn’t until the third player entered the tent that we heard a scream. A few minutes later, a lifeless body was brought out; it was the Self-Made Millionaire, still dripping with blood as they were unceremoniously deposited into the freshly dug trench.
It took over two hours for the line to simply reach its halfway point but that was to be expected. After all, there was only one Deck, there was only one Charles Poelzig and unlike previous holders of the Old Deck, he wanted to play each game personally.
When it was the Well-Dressed Movie Star's turn, six out of the eleven among us had already been placed in the trench. It was impossible not to observe that one of them had been feebly struggling as they were thrown in.
He turned to me as one of the Attendants took him by the elbow, “Pray for me.”
And I had to laugh, how could anyone hope for a merciful God at a time like this?
The minutes ticked by, and uncertainty hung heavy in the air. I wondered to myself how many of the people who had come here truly understood what the Old Deck was, who understood that each card represented a being described in the Nine Rebel Sermons as ”Exalted beyond the realm of mortals, yet humbled by mortal frailty, bearing an essence both divine and earthly.”
When the Smartly-Dressed Movie Star left the tent thirty minutes later his head was held high. He flashed me a grin, “If you make it out call me.”
Then it was my turn.
I entered the tent to see the only table left standing was the one Charles Poelzig had chosen to sit at, and two chairs were placed on either side of it. The flagpole and its fan stood undisturbed. A new flag hung from it and upon the green fabric was the image of a series of overlapping, enigmatic symbols that brought to mind the image of something being torn apart. This was the suit of the Devourer of Visions the tenth card of the Old Deck In front of it were the five defeated players from last night’s game, heads shaven and mouths wired shut. They all had knives in their hands and their brand-new tuxedos were stained with the blood of the gamblers sent to the trench outside.
Near the opposite side of tent Attendant #5 sat on a makeshift throne made from three chairs stacked atop one another. They wore a paper crown on their head and ill-filling clothes that had been salvaged from one of the new Attendants. There was a metal briefcase on their lap. There was a look in their eyes that made me think of the expression a prisoner must have after being released from a long sentence.
With every step I took closer to Charles Poelzig the louder the sound of machinery became, the grinding metal being worked by a thousand gears and motors. A taste like rust filled my mouth. It was loudest when I took my seat, even now I couldn’t tell you if the sound was coming from beneath him or from him.
He glanced up from shuffling the seven remaining cards of the Old Deck. They were made of copper, and the faces of each held a symbol from a witch language birthed in the Screaming Nowhere. On the back of each was the sign of Ezerhodden. “You want the cards?” He asked.
“Why else would I be here?” I said.
The five freshly anointed Attendants moved to stand behind me, their knives at the ready. Poelzig smiled at me, “You were Marvin Greene’s lover.”
“Marvin’s dead.”
“Suicide,” Poelzig said, “Icarus flying too close to the sun.”
“What was his prize?” I asked.
“He’s dead. Does it matter?”
I said, “It matters to me.”
Poelzeg shook his head derisively, “Is that why you’re here? All this just to win an answer to a silly little question?”
“That’s not what I want, but I’d like to know just the same.”
He waved my question away and began to shuffle the Old Deck again. “The rules are this, I draw a card, you draw a card. The higher card wins the round. You keep your card and we begin again until the cards are gone. You win you get our prize. You lose…” he pointed to the Attendants, “and they get you.”
The absurdity was almost too much to bear, the simplest of games turned into a matter of life and death. I watched his hands as they cut and recut the deck, I knew the tricks for stacking a deck. It looked like he was playing fair.
Poelzeg set the deck down between us, “I’ll begin.”
He drew the top card uncovering a divided shape that looked like two faces connected at the center, perfectly reflecting each other. This was the fifth suit of the Old Deck, the sign of Korvylar, the Void-Harbinger.
My draw was next, the card felt cold and metallic to the touch. My fingertips tingled after I set it down, exposing a jagged, circular glyph an insectile eye. This was the first card, Zyvrathul- the Veilweaver. It was early in the game but I still felt a tremor of fear, not the fear of dying but the fear of losing.
My expression must have been obvious because Poelzig began to smirk. “Too late to turn back now.”
“I wouldn’t miss this for the world,” I said. “Tell me what he asked for.”
“Do you think it will help you?” He selected his next card from the top of the deck. It was Xyrlith, the Abbess of Murmurs, the second suit symbolized as a fluid angular mouth-like symbol.
“Are you afraid to tell me?”
Poelzeg tapped the deck, “Draw or default.”
My card was the sixth suit, Thranok, the Desolate Conflux, a series of concentric circles, each containing an arcane spiral.
“An even score in the second round,” he said. “A rarity.”
“How was Marvin doing at this point?”
He chuckled, “Are you always this tenacious? No wonder you’ve come from such a lowly background to make such a fortune.”
That stung a little, I stung back. “We can’t all inherit our wealth. Such a tragedy your parents died so young.”
Despite the provocation his voice softened, “He was winning by now, a score of thirteen.”
That was Marvin all right. Always lucky until he wasn’t. “What did he ask for?”
Poelzeg smiled wickedly, “His third card.”
I mirrored his smile, “His prize. What was his prize? Maybe I want the same thing.”
“Oh,” he laughed, “I doubt that.”
“Why?”
Rather than responding, he proceeded to draw his next card, unveiling the eleventh suit known as Drak'mor, the Abyssal Chariot. This card depicted a cosmic wheel with galaxies arranged as spokes. “Oh dear. That’s eighteen to seven.”
There were only two cards left, the fourth and twelfth suit. One life and one death. My hand hovered over the deck but I dropped it back, “What did he want?”
He threw up his arms, “If I tell you will you finish the game?”
I nodded. The sooner this was over the better.
Poelzeg leaned in conspiratorially, “He wanted to know always know the odds.”
“The odds?” I said, “That’s all?”
He nodded solemnly. "And that is precisely what he received - complete and utter revelation. He knew the result of every coin flip, dice roll, and outcome you could imagine.”
I heard Marvin’s voice in my head, louder than the hum of the fans, louder than the rustling of the flag, louder even than the impossible machine-like roar that churned around us.
“We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
I drew my final card, Sylthara Who Bleeds at the Threshold, a line, a cross, and a curve that somehow resolved itself into a peculiar and human-like shape. The twelfth card.
And just like that, I had won. Visibly disappointed, the new Attendants slunk back to the other side of the room. Poelzeg stared at me with amusement.
“Lucky, lucky. Must be how you survived in the entertainment industry.” He waited for retaliation, but I simply looked away and turned over the last card of the deck to reveal the fourth suit of the Old Deck - Ithryndra, the Conduit of Divine Grace.
"I was supposed to do that," Poelzeg remarked.
Leaning forward, I added, "They say Ithyranda’s followers gain the gift of immortality."
His eyes sparked with interest. "Is that what you desire?"
Resting my hand on my chin, I pretended to ponder. "It depends on the true meaning of immortality."
Poelzeg huffed, "Immortality means immortality."
"You must be aware of the drawbacks," I pressed, a note of accusation creeping into my words.
"I can’t say."
"Can't or won't?" I inquired.
Poelzeg's smile wavered. "What are you going on about? Claim your prize."
"Marvin loved to cheat," I explained, "cheat at cards, cheat at business, he even cheated on me."
Poelzeg snorted, "I can't imagine why."
"He believed his Prize would make everything easy, but he received more than that, didn't he?" I continued. "You mentioned that he saw everything, every possible outcome. He didn't just know the result of each poker hand; he knew the odds of the dealer getting cancer, of the player next to him cheating on their spouse. He couldn't even walk down the street without knowing the probability of the man on the sidewalk turning left or right."
"So?" I persisted, my voice unwavering.
Poelzeg sighed, "So what?"
"You could have warned him, but it amused you not to," I accused. "What will happen to the others who played tonight?" I inquired.
"I've answered enough questions," Poelzeg replied.
I leaned back in my seat, contemplating immortality, wealth, forbidden wisdom, and hidden worlds. I had the power to choose anything I desired.
But then, memories of that fateful night in Singapore flooded my mind.
Poelzeg's eyes narrowed, his patience running thin. "What. Is. Your. Prize?"
A smile spread across my face.
Section Six
When it was over, I sat alone at the table with the Old Deck. The sounds of the Engines of Creation were fading now. I wondered what the Old Deck had originally been meant to do. What strange alchemy had it been meant to work? Surely nothing like the Poelzeg Experience. Even the Nine Rebel Sermons had been unclear on that point, only saying that ”Each disciple of Ezerhodden reverently received their sacred card, clutching it tightly to their bosom, and embarked upon a solemn pilgrimage into the Verge to smite the children of Mazzikin…”
I began to shuffle the deck; there was something about the feel of those cards in your hand that made you have to shuffle them. And with each motion of my fingers, the sensation became more pleasurable. In my mind's eye, I saw how each of the missing cards had been destroyed: the first during a clandestine gathering of scholars in an ancient library, the second during a midnight ritual in a desolate cemetery during the 17th century, the third during the 19th-century Arctic expedition led by Captain John Franklin during a desperate performance of the Rite of Edgagor, and the fifth lost in the ruins of Tunguska. I saw the Old Deck travel the world, from a temple shrine in the Babylonian city of Kish to the bedside of Cesare Borgia to the offices of Charles Poelzeg.
Then I looked up and saw the woman in the green dress standing before me. Up close, I could see the thick pancake makeup, rouge, and eyeliner she wore. Only her lips were bare of cosmetics, and they were thin and bloodless. Despite the fact that I knew her face was flesh and blood, there was still something about her that made me think she was wearing a mask.
I handed her the Old Deck and then allowed one of the Attendants to deliver me back to the airport.
From there, my life settled into a quiet monotony. I got older, I got richer. I got married, I got divorced. I committed crimes, I avoided jail. And today, I find myself in a summer home transformed into a hospice, talking to the most foolish of my nephews.
My sources tell me you’re a horrible gambler. How much of your wife’s money have you lost over the last two years? A little over a million? A little less? If you get on that plane to Columbia you’ll lose more. The greedy stooges behind your invitation are counting on it.
The sources that mentioned your vulnerability also informed me of the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. During the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
that there's a statue of the Seventh Barishamada at the center of this casino slash amusement park you’ll be going to. It is over twenty feet tall and made of brass. They tell me that on the last night of the Festival, a bonfire is lit beneath it and the air fills with screams and smoke.
The same sources that revealed your vulnerability also provided me with details about this upcoming venture. They mentioned the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino slash amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. I've been informed that during the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
Hear me out. Don’t go. Your wife and children will burn and you will be reduced to a toothless, hairless ruin aged beyond their years.
Good. If you want to win something back, aim to reclaim your heart and soul. Be more than just a swindler and a gullible gambler.
Now, it's time for you to go. I've been told I don't have much time left, and I'd rather spend it in peace in my garden with my duck pond.
As for my Prize, I thought about other temptations like money, power, or second chances. But what I truly wanted is what I received my hands around Charles Poelzeg’s throat.
END TRANSCRIPT
submitted by ChannelAb3 to WritersOfHorror [link] [comments]

2023.11.26 17:35 ChannelAb3 THE POLZEIG EXPERIENCE Part two

PREVIOUS PART
​
Despite my aches and pains, I had no problem sleeping that night. There were dreams again, but this time they were vivid and memorable. They were filled with distorted images of a grand staircase descending into the unknown, walls bending inward, and open doors leading to revealed nothing but shadows. But one hallway drew me in, its yellow curtains swaying lazily. With each step further down the hall, the curtains moved and rippled more, and I began to hear a humming that came from either behind the veil of fabric or perhaps the fabric itself. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch the curtains; the material was damp and warm to the touch. Strange yet familiar symbols flitted out from where my fingers had brushed the fabric. The static music rose up, filling my mind with names from the lost cards of the Old Deck - Zyvrathul, Grythar, Vyraska, Astrylith.
Finally, inevitably, the hallway brought me to a dead-end alcove. That was where Marvin was waiting for me. He sat at a table with a revolver in his hand.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Waiting for you,” he answered.
“Why did you do it?”
He placed the revolver to his head, “Because I won.”
Mercifully, I woke up before he pulled the trigger.
At around ten in the morning, an Attendant delivered me a paper plate covered with warm Eggo waffles and a cup of tepid water. When I asked for seconds of both, they happily brought them to me. Six hours later, I was brought a thermos of coffee, a bag lunch containing a sandwich, and an apple. I asked if there was anything to read, and they brought me Volume 71 of Reader’s Digest condensed books. It was all I needed to pass the time until sunset.
I was almost finished with the first book in the volume when the Attendant came to fetch me. This time when I entered the Yellow Tent, I was given a square of paper and a miniature pencil. One side of the paper was a tally of my baccarat winnings, the other was blank. I ended up standing in line next to the Self-Made Millionaire. “All this… nonsense,” he said. “The Old Deck is in the hands of a lunatic.”
“What’s left of the Old Deck, you mean,” someone else commented.
I kept my silence; there were Attendants everywhere, and I knew one of them must have heard. Let someone else find visitors in their trailer tonight.
And besides, in all my studies about the Old Deck, I’d never heard of a single innocent or rational soul having it in their possession. The previous owner of the Old Deck had been a ruthless harridan who made her fortune in real estate and was supposedly secretly involved in the death of Evelyn McHale and the establishment of the National Prayer Breakfast.
It was open seating in the Yellow Tent. I chose the third row of the right corner and settled in, the pencil and paper resting on one knee. This time the suit depicted hanging over the stage depicted two symbolic figures intertwined in an otherworldly dance. This was the ninth card of the Old Deck, the sign of the Tearer of Realms.
The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped onto the stage and instructed us that we would be given three minutes to make our choice, and then the slips of paper and pencils would be collected. She further explained that we could either bet nothing at all, all our winnings, or Wager for the Deck. We were also instructed to mark down our competitor of choice as clearly as possible. Then she clapped her hands twice, and six of the Attendants filed out onto the stage, each wearing a medallion with a number around their chest.
I thought of the Owner of a Regional Supermarket Chain and the other losers from last night, their fortunes lost and their futures uncertain. I imagined them traveling home, both disappointed and relieved to have been spared this choice.
Nothing at all. All my winnings. Wager for the Deck.
What would the others be deciding for? I was sure the majority would choose the first option. Some had already lost enough. Some had won enough. And I am sure a select few just wanted to see the grotesquerie to follow.
But undoubtedly greed would drive a number of the people seated around me to risk all their winnings for the chance of an 80% payout.
Only a few of us would be mad enough to Wager for the Deck.
That decision had already been made for me; it had been made for me the day I received Marvin’s posthumous letter. All I had to worry over was which of the six Attendants to choose. I stared at each of them, trying to guess who the winner would be, and was immediately frustrated. When it came to Baccarat, I had my wits and skill to get me ahead, but now all I had to rely on was luck, and as you know, I am no fan of luck.
It was then that I noticed that Attendant number five was the broken-nosed one. After a moment’s consideration, I wrote their number down. After three minutes had passed, Attendants began to file through the rows of seats and collect our bets
They made us wait a little longer before the Mistress of Ceremonies began to walk back and forth so everyone could get a good look at the revolver she was holding. She inserted five bullets into the cylinder and gave it a spin before clicking it firmly shut.
The Attendants began to sing, six dry voices keening as one, “Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now am found was blind but now I see-”
BLAM!
We all flinched in our seats at the sound. Attendant One crumpled to the floor, a smoldering wound in the back of their head. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on to the next.
“T’was Grace that taught my heart to fear. And Grace, my fears relieved. How precious did that grace appear. The hour I first believed-“
BLAM!
Attendant Two made a tiny gulping sound and pitched forward. The Mistress of Ceremonies moved on.
“Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come; 'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home-”
BLAM!
Down went Attendant Three. We had grown used the sound now. Some of the audience leaned forward in their seats, eager and terrified, others slumped back, their posture and expression betraying the depths of their loss.
“The Lord has promised good to me. His word my hope secures. He will my shield and portion be. As long as life endures-”
BLAM!
Attendant Four dropped. A commotion broke out in the audience as the Smug High-Ranking Official tried to make a run for it. He went down in a swarm of black tuxedos and grasping liver-spotted hands.
“Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail. And mortal life shall cease. I shall possess within the veil. A life of joy and peace-”
Click.
An audible gasp went through us all. The Mistress of Ceremonies stepped over to the last of the Attendants.
“When we've been here ten thousand years. Bright shining as the sun. We've no less days to sing God's praise. Then when we've first begun.”
BLAM!
The sixth Attendant dropped. The game ended.
Section Five
I spent most of the next day relaxing and watching from my window as most of the guests of the Poelzig Experience left their trailers and headed home. I made a game of it, trying to guess by their posture and gait if they were leaving empty-handed or richer than before. The ones like me, the ones that had Wagered for the Deck and won were waiting for sunset, sitting in our trailers with bonbons and champagne.
And as for the ones that had wagered and lost? Their screams had been audible all morning but by my fifth glass of champagne, I had lost interest in such considerations. Time passed slowly and pleasantly, until sometime after lunch I laid my spinning head down on my pillow and imagined what Marvin had been doing at this point in the Experience. Had been drunk and relived like me or had he been worried? Was he still trying to decide what his winnings would be or did he know what he wanted? Had he wished I was there?
As I drifted off to sleep I remembered our last conversation. I’d asked him why he’d stopped gambling and he’d said, “We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
The knock on my door woke me up, it was time. The Attendant that greeted me was unfamiliar, they offered me a friendly grin. I asked the for a cigarette, of course, they had one. I enjoyed it, taking my time as they led me to the Yellow Tent. I found myself at the end of the line, which was exactly where I wanted to be. I found myself standing next to the Well-Dressed Movie Star. “You made it,” he said, his voice emotionless.
“Excited?” I made a quick count of who was left. There were eleven in all, eleven mad fools waiting for a chance to take control of the Engines of Creation, if only for a moment. No one had been allowed in yet.
“I just…” he glanced over to the side of the old barn where a trio of Attendants were hard at work digging a deep trench into the ground. Despite the dirt and the sweaty labor they still had their tuxedos on. The bodies of Attendants One, Two, Three, Four, and Six were lying nearby. “I just want this to be over.”
“Losing your nerve?” I asked.
“I could lose everything.”
And that was true. The first of us was ushered inside, I didn’t recognize the player and when they left the tent some time later they were cracking with joy. “Mine mine mine!” they shouted to the stars. The next player was ushered inside and it continued. It wasn’t until the third player entered the tent that we heard a scream. A few minutes later, a lifeless body was brought out; it was the Self-Made Millionaire, still dripping with blood as they were unceremoniously deposited into the freshly dug trench.
It took over two hours for the line to simply reach its halfway point but that was to be expected. After all, there was only one Deck, there was only one Charles Poelzig and unlike previous holders of the Old Deck, he wanted to play each game personally.
When it was the Well-Dressed Movie Star's turn, six out of the eleven among us had already been placed in the trench. It was impossible not to observe that one of them had been feebly struggling as they were thrown in.
He turned to me as one of the Attendants took him by the elbow, “Pray for me.”
And I had to laugh, how could anyone hope for a merciful God at a time like this?
The minutes ticked by, and uncertainty hung heavy in the air. I wondered to myself how many of the people who had come here truly understood what the Old Deck was, who understood that each card represented a being described in the Nine Rebel Sermons as ”Exalted beyond the realm of mortals, yet humbled by mortal frailty, bearing an essence both divine and earthly.”
When the Smartly-Dressed Movie Star left the tent thirty minutes later his head was held high. He flashed me a grin, “If you make it out call me.”
Then it was my turn.
I entered the tent to see the only table left standing was the one Charles Poelzig had chosen to sit at, and two chairs were placed on either side of it. The flagpole and its fan stood undisturbed. A new flag hung from it and upon the green fabric was the image of a series of overlapping, enigmatic symbols that brought to mind the image of something being torn apart. This was the suit of the Devourer of Visions the tenth card of the Old Deck In front of it were the five defeated players from last night’s game, heads shaven and mouths wired shut. They all had knives in their hands and their brand-new tuxedos were stained with the blood of the gamblers sent to the trench outside.
Near the opposite side of tent Attendant #5 sat on a makeshift throne made from three chairs stacked atop one another. They wore a paper crown on their head and ill-filling clothes that had been salvaged from one of the new Attendants. There was a metal briefcase on their lap. There was a look in their eyes that made me think of the expression a prisoner must have after being released from a long sentence.
With every step I took closer to Charles Poelzig the louder the sound of machinery became, the grinding metal being worked by a thousand gears and motors. A taste like rust filled my mouth. It was loudest when I took my seat, even now I couldn’t tell you if the sound was coming from beneath him or from him.
He glanced up from shuffling the seven remaining cards of the Old Deck. They were made of copper, and the faces of each held a symbol from a witch language birthed in the Screaming Nowhere. On the back of each was the sign of Ezerhodden. “You want the cards?” He asked.
“Why else would I be here?” I said.
The five freshly anointed Attendants moved to stand behind me, their knives at the ready. Poelzig smiled at me, “You were Marvin Greene’s lover.”
“Marvin’s dead.”
“Suicide,” Poelzig said, “Icarus flying too close to the sun.”
“What was his prize?” I asked.
“He’s dead. Does it matter?”
I said, “It matters to me.”
Poelzeg shook his head derisively, “Is that why you’re here? All this just to win an answer to a silly little question?”
“That’s not what I want, but I’d like to know just the same.”
He waved my question away and began to shuffle the Old Deck again. “The rules are this, I draw a card, you draw a card. The higher card wins the round. You keep your card and we begin again until the cards are gone. You win you get our prize. You lose…” he pointed to the Attendants, “and they get you.”
The absurdity was almost too much to bear, the simplest of games turned into a matter of life and death. I watched his hands as they cut and recut the deck, I knew the tricks for stacking a deck. It looked like he was playing fair.
Poelzeg set the deck down between us, “I’ll begin.”
He drew the top card uncovering a divided shape that looked like two faces connected at the center, perfectly reflecting each other. This was the fifth suit of the Old Deck, the sign of Korvylar, the Void-Harbinger.
My draw was next, the card felt cold and metallic to the touch. My fingertips tingled after I set it down, exposing a jagged, circular glyph an insectile eye. This was the first card, Zyvrathul- the Veilweaver. It was early in the game but I still felt a tremor of fear, not the fear of dying but the fear of losing.
My expression must have been obvious because Poelzig began to smirk. “Too late to turn back now.”
“I wouldn’t miss this for the world,” I said. “Tell me what he asked for.”
“Do you think it will help you?” He selected his next card from the top of the deck. It was Xyrlith, the Abbess of Murmurs, the second suit symbolized as a fluid angular mouth-like symbol.
“Are you afraid to tell me?”
Poelzeg tapped the deck, “Draw or default.”
My card was the sixth suit, Thranok, the Desolate Conflux, a series of concentric circles, each containing an arcane spiral.
“An even score in the second round,” he said. “A rarity.”
“How was Marvin doing at this point?”
He chuckled, “Are you always this tenacious? No wonder you’ve come from such a lowly background to make such a fortune.”
That stung a little, I stung back. “We can’t all inherit our wealth. Such a tragedy your parents died so young.”
Despite the provocation his voice softened, “He was winning by now, a score of thirteen.”
That was Marvin all right. Always lucky until he wasn’t. “What did he ask for?”
Poelzeg smiled wickedly, “His third card.”
I mirrored his smile, “His prize. What was his prize? Maybe I want the same thing.”
“Oh,” he laughed, “I doubt that.”
“Why?”
Rather than responding, he proceeded to draw his next card, unveiling the eleventh suit known as Drak'mor, the Abyssal Chariot. This card depicted a cosmic wheel with galaxies arranged as spokes. “Oh dear. That’s eighteen to seven.”
There were only two cards left, the fourth and twelfth suit. One life and one death. My hand hovered over the deck but I dropped it back, “What did he want?”
He threw up his arms, “If I tell you will you finish the game?”
I nodded. The sooner this was over the better.
Poelzeg leaned in conspiratorially, “He wanted to know always know the odds.”
“The odds?” I said, “That’s all?”
He nodded solemnly. "And that is precisely what he received - complete and utter revelation. He knew the result of every coin flip, dice roll, and outcome you could imagine.”
I heard Marvin’s voice in my head, louder than the hum of the fans, louder than the rustling of the flag, louder even than the impossible machine-like roar that churned around us.
“We never had a chance. All that waits is the Screaming Nowhere at the heart of the Engines of Creation.”
I drew my final card, Sylthara Who Bleeds at the Threshold, a line, a cross, and a curve that somehow resolved itself into a peculiar and human-like shape. The twelfth card.
And just like that, I had won. Visibly disappointed, the new Attendants slunk back to the other side of the room. Poelzeg stared at me with amusement.
“Lucky, lucky. Must be how you survived in the entertainment industry.” He waited for retaliation, but I simply looked away and turned over the last card of the deck to reveal the fourth suit of the Old Deck - Ithryndra, the Conduit of Divine Grace.
"I was supposed to do that," Poelzeg remarked.
Leaning forward, I added, "They say Ithyranda’s followers gain the gift of immortality."
His eyes sparked with interest. "Is that what you desire?"
Resting my hand on my chin, I pretended to ponder. "It depends on the true meaning of immortality."
Poelzeg huffed, "Immortality means immortality."
"You must be aware of the drawbacks," I pressed, a note of accusation creeping into my words.
"I can’t say."
"Can't or won't?" I inquired.
Poelzeg's smile wavered. "What are you going on about? Claim your prize."
"Marvin loved to cheat," I explained, "cheat at cards, cheat at business, he even cheated on me."
Poelzeg snorted, "I can't imagine why."
"He believed his Prize would make everything easy, but he received more than that, didn't he?" I continued. "You mentioned that he saw everything, every possible outcome. He didn't just know the result of each poker hand; he knew the odds of the dealer getting cancer, of the player next to him cheating on their spouse. He couldn't even walk down the street without knowing the probability of the man on the sidewalk turning left or right."
"So?" I persisted, my voice unwavering.
Poelzeg sighed, "So what?"
"You could have warned him, but it amused you not to," I accused. "What will happen to the others who played tonight?" I inquired.
"I've answered enough questions," Poelzeg replied.
I leaned back in my seat, contemplating immortality, wealth, forbidden wisdom, and hidden worlds. I had the power to choose anything I desired.
But then, memories of that fateful night in Singapore flooded my mind.
Poelzeg's eyes narrowed, his patience running thin. "What. Is. Your. Prize?"
A smile spread across my face.
Section Six
When it was over, I sat alone at the table with the Old Deck. The sounds of the Engines of Creation were fading now. I wondered what the Old Deck had originally been meant to do. What strange alchemy had it been meant to work? Surely nothing like the Poelzeg Experience. Even the Nine Rebel Sermons had been unclear on that point, only saying that ”Each disciple of Ezerhodden reverently received their sacred card, clutching it tightly to their bosom, and embarked upon a solemn pilgrimage into the Verge to smite the children of Mazzikin…”
I began to shuffle the deck; there was something about the feel of those cards in your hand that made you have to shuffle them. And with each motion of my fingers, the sensation became more pleasurable. In my mind's eye, I saw how each of the missing cards had been destroyed: the first during a clandestine gathering of scholars in an ancient library, the second during a midnight ritual in a desolate cemetery during the 17th century, the third during the 19th-century Arctic expedition led by Captain John Franklin during a desperate performance of the Rite of Edgagor, and the fifth lost in the ruins of Tunguska. I saw the Old Deck travel the world, from a temple shrine in the Babylonian city of Kish to the bedside of Cesare Borgia to the offices of Charles Poelzeg.
Then I looked up and saw the woman in the green dress standing before me. Up close, I could see the thick pancake makeup, rouge, and eyeliner she wore. Only her lips were bare of cosmetics, and they were thin and bloodless. Despite the fact that I knew her face was flesh and blood, there was still something about her that made me think she was wearing a mask.
I handed her the Old Deck and then allowed one of the Attendants to deliver me back to the airport.
From there, my life settled into a quiet monotony. I got older, I got richer. I got married, I got divorced. I committed crimes, I avoided jail. And today, I find myself in a summer home transformed into a hospice, talking to the most foolish of my nephews.
My sources tell me you’re a horrible gambler. How much of your wife’s money have you lost over the last two years? A little over a million? A little less? If you get on that plane to Columbia you’ll lose more. The greedy stooges behind your invitation are counting on it.
The sources that mentioned your vulnerability also informed me of the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. During the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
that there's a statue of the Seventh Barishamada at the center of this casino slash amusement park you’ll be going to. It is over twenty feet tall and made of brass. They tell me that on the last night of the Festival, a bonfire is lit beneath it and the air fills with screams and smoke.
The same sources that revealed your vulnerability also provided me with details about this upcoming venture. They mentioned the colossal statue of the Seventh Barishamada positioned at the heart of the casino slash amusement park you're set to visit. This statue is constructed from brass and stands at a height exceeding twenty feet. I've been informed that during the Festival's final night, a bonfire is kindled beneath it, enveloping the air in a symphony of screams and smoke.
Hear me out. Don’t go. Your wife and children will burn and you will be reduced to a toothless, hairless ruin aged beyond their years.
Good. If you want to win something back, aim to reclaim your heart and soul. Be more than just a swindler and a gullible gambler.
Now, it's time for you to go. I've been told I don't have much time left, and I'd rather spend it in peace in my garden with my duck pond.
As for my Prize, I thought about other temptations like money, power, or second chances. But what I truly wanted is what I received my hands around Charles Poelzeg’s throat.
END TRANSCRIPT
submitted by ChannelAb3 to libraryofshadows [link] [comments]

2023.11.21 19:03 clxmzykid What if ROBIN HOOD was an assassin??

I had an idea, dunno if it's already been brought up before, so please excuse me if that does happen to be the case.
So the game would obviously be set in the Medieval England during the middle ages (late 12th century). I thought that Prince John--younger brother of King Richard--could be the main antagonist/villain while Richard--who could maaaaayyyyybe be a Grandmaster--is outta town on some other business or whatever...?
If anyone's seen the old-ish Robin Hood movie where he's a fox, you'll remember that he's not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed. This concept reminded me of Cesare Borgia from Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, because he, too, was a bit of a whiny lil baby in some parts of the game. Prince John's character could be sort of built around that kind of personality? That is, if Ubisoft even decided to portray him as such.
Of course, Maid Marian would be Robin Hood's lover, like how Arno had Elsie, or Evie with Henry Green, etc. I haven't thought of how she would fit into it all yet shrugs.
Little John could maybe be to Robin what Adéwalé was to Edward in Black Flag...? I think that'd be cool. Although, Little John would probably play a more-involved role in the story and not just stand next to you when you're sailing the Jackdaw... cough cough Adéwalé for at least the first half of the game cough cough.
Regarding Robin Hood, I was also thinking of something similar to how Edward became apart of the Brotherhood. He could start out just doin' his usual thing: stealing from the rich to help the poor, and maybe one day, he happens to steal from none other than the ASSASSIN'S--who obviously track Robin Hood back to his hideout in Sherwood Forest, and through recognizing Robin Hood's excellent thieving skills, offer him a place amongst their ranks--where he may put his abilities to better use and "serve a greater purpose" and whatnot. Then once Robin Hood's become a full-fledged assassin, he and the brotherhood of that region take down whatever plot or schemes Prince John's got going on and bippity-boppity-boo! Everything works out!
Now, I think all of this would be really cool. What do you guys think?
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