Using an alt because my friends use Reddit and not sure if I want to open this stuff up to those in my life as things haven't settled between everyone yet. I (26F) have a younger sister, Lily (24F), who’s been with her fiancé, Mark (28M), for three years. They’ve always seemed really happy together, and they’re planning to get married next summer. Lily and I have always been close, but she can get pretty intense and a bit paranoid when it comes to relationships.
A few weeks ago, Lily told me about this plan she had. She wanted to test Mark’s loyalty by having her friend Sarah flirt with him at a party to see how he’d react. I told her it was a terrible idea and that she should just trust him, but she was dead set on it. She said she needed to be sure Mark wouldn’t cheat on her once they’re married.
So, last weekend at a party, Sarah went ahead with the plan. According to Lily, Mark was nice but didn’t flirt back and even mentioned he was engaged. But Lily was still upset because she felt he didn’t shut Sarah down "forcefully enough."
I thought this whole thing was really unfair to Mark. He had no idea he was being tested, and I felt bad for him. So, I ended up telling him what Lily did. He was shocked and hurt but thanked me for being honest with him. Now, Lily is absolutely furious with me. She says I betrayed her and ruined her relationship. She won’t talk to me, and she’s saying I overstepped big time.
Our parents are split on this—Mom thinks I did the right thing, but Dad thinks I should’ve stayed out of it. Mark is now reconsidering the engagement, and Lily has cut me off completely.
I’m feeling really torn and guilty. I don’t know if I did the right thing by telling Mark or if I should’ve just stayed out of it. AITA? And if I am how do I fix this? Should I try to repair my relationship with Lily, Should I reach out to Mark again or give him space?
Any advice would be really appreciated. I’m so lost right now.

i booked a long term stay starting on may 12, but ended up choosing to come on may 13 but did not tell the host because i figured it did not affect check-in or anything.
i got here yesterday afternoon and did a walkthrough of the place. it is a much older, jankier building with dated furniture and squeaky floors and an odd layout, so i didn’t really notice the cleanliness then more than just the odd vibe to it all. i put my stuff inside and then tried to move the fridge because it was covering a light switch. when i moved the fridge a MASSIVE pile of ants was revealed. obviously i moved all of my stuff to be on top of the dining room table and immediately left to buy raid and ant traps. i took pictures and sent them to the host, who said it was a “bad spring for ants” and offered to bring by a trap, but i had already bought some. later in the night he offered to compensate me for my time and the traps, and hasn’t gotten back to me on that yet.
sprayed the ants and cleaned and moved the fridge all the way around to get as many ants as possible. swiffered the floor after.
i didn’t trust the couch so went out and bought lysol and crazy lysol-ed that thing. also sprayed raid along all the baseboards and everything. i was in and out all day, meeting some friends and running some errands and so i did not thoroughly look at everything until later in the night.
there is hair EVERYWHERE. it is on the pillows, in between the sheets, in the tub/shower, around the sink, in the sink, on the floors, etc. it’s disgusting. the washedryer were visibly dirty and i cleaned them with clorox before feeling comfortable using them. i washed the comforter from my bed and then found the lint trap in the dryer was completely full. the comforter smelled funky once it came out of the dryer. tons of surfaces are dusty. i did not feel comfortable putting my things on anything that wasn’t a hard surface that i sanitized. i scrubbed the sink before i felt comfortable washing my dishes. i bought a cover for the couch before i felt comfortable sitting on it. i swiffered everywhere. i wore shower shoes to take a necessary shower last night.
bigger issue is this place does not match the listing photos. the photos are clearly from a while ago. paint colors are different, furniture is different, decorations are different. i’m pretty disappointed.
so what do i say?? i’m obviously going to contact the host because this is supposed to be my home for the next 3 months (long term stay) and i won’t feel comfortable being here until it’s cleaned. i’m realizing now that i probably shouldn’t have cleaned anything and found a hotel for the night. but i was trying my best to get comfy with the place and thinking that i just needed to clean it if it was ever going to get done. this is my first long term stay on airbnb and i just feel so grossed out and uncomfortable and i lowkey just want to find another place to go. how do i proceed?

My husband recently filled out my immigration paper work to sponsor me. I live with him in the states ( I am from Canada). My daughter who was living in states with us ( I had 50/50 custody with my Ex, he went back to Canada) was going to move back to Canada but decided to stay in US with us. Shes 14 turning 15. Is it to late to apply for her now especially since my husband checked off he wouldn't be sponsoring anyone else in next 6 months on application??

Since I was a kid, I knew how my parents were. I used to hate them; I felt left out. My parents used to sleep separately. My mom and us would sleep in a different house, and my father would sleep in our childhood home. Sometimes we slept together. We were that type of middle-class family—my parents could buy us our wants and needs, but due to business, they were busy. My dad sometimes went to his childhood province. Being a second child, I was kind of a brat and talked back to my parents. But as I grew up, I got shy and became an introvert. It’s hard for me to share my problems with people or even my parents.
We have a lot of houses, specifically my grandparents’. They are upper-class people. Different people, relatives, and nannies took care of us while our parents traveled or were busy with business. I didn’t care much, but in 5th grade, I learned my dad cheated on my mom with my mom’s best friend. They got married secretly and had a child. It really bothered me. I started to change; I got quiet, shy, and very introverted while my mom was suffering. But I also hated her instead of hating my dad because she didn’t really care about us. She cared more about our sibling. She didn’t even know how to be a wife to my dad. Still, my dad divorced his second wife and got back together with my mom.
By the way, when we found out about the cheating, my mom was also pregnant with her 6th child. Now we’re seven siblings altogether. I also have an online friend who I met online. I started sharing my problems with her to the point she even changed her IG user to my name, like @mynameismygirlfriend. And by the way, she’s not my girlfriend; she’s just a friend. Then one day, my mom spanked me and told me to go take a shower. I brought my phone with me and chatted with that online friend in the bathroom. My mom checked the bathroom because it didn’t have a lock. She caught me and was trying to get my phone, but I was pulling it back because I had sent a message saying, "I hope my parents divorce." That message really ruined my life. Do I regret sending that message? Maybe yes, maybe no.
Another thing is my diary, where there’s a page saying I hate her and I wish she hadn’t become my mom. I wished my dad’s youngest sister was my mom because I was jealous of my cousin and how my auntie treated them. For months I was suffering because my mom was hurting me almost every day, and I was suffering almost every day. One thing for sure was considering suicide. I was suffering from depression and anxiety at that time, but my mom doesn’t believe in that stuff when it comes to me because my parents said I was just being distracted by a devil.
Since I was a kid, I knew I was not the favorite child, but it’s okay; I learned to live with it. I also developed a habit of stealing money from my parents, and they found out about it twice. They always bring it up when something is missing; they would immediately ask me. By the way, part of my diary is about me trying to change, but it’s hard when they keep bringing up my past. All those bad habits were left in my past, but you choose to bring them up whenever there’s a topic about those habits. You would bring it up. Yes, I still constantly leave whenever you talk and try to teach me a lesson, but because you guys keep bringing up my past. Sorry if I was disrespectful, but I'm really tired of you guys abusing me mentally and physically. You’re ruining me day by day. I can’t wait to leave this house and prove something. If being boastful is what my parents call me, I don’t care. I’m tired. There’s a lot that you guys don’t know about because these are only a few things you did to me.

Gullible-Soft-8628:
Dec 18, 2022

Lower back pain related to PVPS? Same side as my bad ball with epididymis inflamed with fluid .. every so often I get lower back and abdomen pain. Is it related or do I just suck?

I had same thing, very related. I recommend NO Vasectomy, and get a reversal ASAP. I am 3+ months post reversal, 95% relief from pain, 100% relief from brain fog and low drive issues.
https://www.reddit.com/postvasectomypain/comments/yvgw6x/lower_back_pain_related_to_pvps/j0sb6f1/
I recommend a reversal ASAP. Dr Hickman recommended minimum of 6 month wait. Heavy, congested feeling, orgasms were pitiful, brain fog, low back pain. Had a reversal September, as of Dec 18, 95% pain relief and feel continuing improvement. Brain fog gone, orgasms back to normal, drive is good again. I recommend Dr Hickman from New Braunfels TX. Professional and economical, $3200 versus the 8 to 10k that most of the others will charge
https://www.reddit.com/postvasectomypain/comments/znmezh/how_long_would_you_wait_post_vasectomy_to/j0sc7wz/
Another testimony... I suffered 6 months until i got the reversal. I am 3+ months post-reversal. Thank God I am Almost 100% pain-free, much better frame of mind, back to jogging, cycling, and hiking with my family. I know this isn't the cure for everyone, but it would definitely be my first choice.
Be prepared for roller-coaster healing process though, the first 2 months post reversal were rough, up and down, but its leveled out big time.
Don't give up hope, there's better days ahead
https://www.reddit.com/postvasectomypain/comments/zfad7z/deleted_by_usej0sdbb1/
Highly recommend a reversal asap if you're having pvps, its the best chance to get back to original. Vasectomy is a disaster, don't do it, its not worth the risk
https://www.reddit.com/queensland/comments/zlfdg9/metrocentre_vasectomy_redoreversal_for_pvps/j0ws43
Back to jogging, lifting, playing with my children, etc.
https://www.reddit.com/queensland/comments/zlfdg9/metrocentre_vasectomy_redoreversal_for_pvps/j0wsg91/
I second the recommendation to NOT perform surgery on genitals... too many nerve endings down there
https://www.reddit.com/postvasectomypain/comments/vccbzq/pvps_for_years_now_and_still_pain_post_reversal/j0wu2q6/
Maybe some can handle the pvps better than I could, it was devastating. Not many people write back in on blogs like this after-the-fact, you just happy to get beyond. Life can get back to normal. Its condoms and all that again, but 1000 x rather this than live with depression, pain, and a 10lb weight between my legs. A reversal was a lot of ups and downs the first 2 months for me, but thank God I'm living pain free and feeling terrific at 3 months post... If you need to wait a while, hang in there, better days ahead!
https://www.reddit.com/postvasectomypain/comments/znmezh/how_long_would_you_wait_post_vasectomy_to/j11lxud/
I can post a positive. Had pvps kick in at 2 months. I hung on doing exercises, antibiotics, everything 'conservative' in the books with no success. Had a reversal at 6 months, September 2022, am feeling 100% better. I know its not 100% for everyone, but its the best bet, get things back to as 'original' as possible. Lots of ups and downs the first 2 to 3 months post reversal, but never as bad as the pvps
https://www.reddit.com/postvasectomypain/comments/zep1fx/did_a_reversal_make_your_pain_worse/j11n86s/
Real results are closer 1 in 20 will suffer pvps. I had a reversal 6 months later... 6 months of sheer misery. If you are the 1, it will ruin your life. Look up the pvps blogs on reddit, PVPS is VERY UNDERRATED. But then again 19 out of 20 get away with it and are super happy. your choice, but most vasectomy doctors won't tell you the real risks
https://www.reddit.com/Vasectomy/comments/zkmcxu/have_consult_scheduled_this_week_but_pvps_odds_of/j11p6i3/
Dr Marks has good referrals. Dr Hickman in New Braunfels Texas did my reversal, very happy with his work. 3+ months post reversal and pretty much back to normal, thank God.
Dont figure on pvps going away on its own, never heard of it getting better by itself. But maybe there are some who don't write about it
https://www.reddit.com/postvasectomypain/comments/yonicu/does_anyone_have_pvps_like_this/j11q2qe/
Pvps pain was bottom of testicles radiating up in to abdomen. Days of laying in bed, couldn't walk at times, heavy, congested feeling, lots of brain fog and depression.
Reversal pain was Swelling, bruising, like the inside of the whole scrotum was sore when i moved. That pain took a month to leave. Then i had the heavy congested feelings from time to time, but less each time and further apart. Almost like the congested epididymus took time to empty out?? I don't know. I'm still tender at 3.5 months, had 3 long days on the road this past week and today i had to take ibuprofen to keep going. But this is the first pain in weeks, the trend is definitly going right at this point... still praying for 100% healing but much better than pre-reversal. But i'm just one story... wish you the best
https://www.reddit.com/postvasectomypain/comments/zep1fx/did_a_reversal_make_your_pain_worse/j1f5xxa/
Metadata:
ID: 3868d1b7
Name: Gullible-Soft-8628
Vasectomy Date: 2022-03
Source: reddit
Posted: 2022-12-18
Location: USA
Storycodes: LTP,SGR,LL,OTR,DC,PYH
Reversal Date: 2022-09
Months: 8
Resolved: Yes

I know there used to be one where you could submit a form to add a GP, but I can’t for the life of me find it. The only other document I can find says to submit using a form, with no form available that I can find?
Asking because I’ve recently found an absolutely lovely GP in my area and wanted to expand the list. For reference she’s helping me appeal a clinic’s decision to deny me surgical sterilisation and said she’d inquire with a colleague about referring me to a place in Brighton to get prescribed HRT (I know next to nothing about it, neither of us know if it’s even an option for me to go there, but that’s why she’s asking). And she also asked me if I’d like my NHS number changed so I can have my correct gender and name on their system.
Like, she’s amazing.
If anyone knows where this list went I’d love it if you could tell me where to find it!

My IB exams will be over tomorrow (it’s listening Dw). Here’s my take for future students. IB is not worth doing, I will try to include all the popular aspects— could be useful for parents and students interested.

1. Cost

Let’s be real. IB is hella expensive with little to no ROI for its worth. I spent 15lakhs (almost $15,000) inr for 2 years while my friend doing a different program spent 2lakhs inr ($2000) (can be more cheaper). And now we both are going through a similasame college process for international.

1. Credits

Let’s be real you can just take IB exams for IB certificates and get IB credits. If you’re doing JEE you guys already cover more than our syllabus except for options, which are relatively easier. Just check in with your current program and IB to see if the syllabus is similar—at most they are the same.

1. Prestige

If you’re going in IB for prestige you’ll make a big fool of yourself. Yes I know with time management you can do everything, the reality is NO. You’ll see your friends completing their 12th way before you (in my case it happened not sure about others) the only prestige you’ll feel is for those 2 years you can tell yourself you did the IB but no one will care.

1. Mental health

Well all subreddits related to IB cover this no need to go through it again but yes not worth it. Much better with other programs

1. Ease into first year

Okay let’s be honest here. You will know how to do an academic report better than the rest, you will nail your first year. What’s next? A person who hasn’t done the IB will soon get to your level after 1-2 semester. Then what? Did you honestly pay $15,000 for “easing into university” which already costs multiple life savings? Just do an online course on academic report in summer (can be free if you’re smart) and you’re better off than us.

1. bETtEr tImE ManAgemEnt sKillS

Bro stfu. Are you seriously paying so much to learn time management? All I see when people are arguing about why you should do IB is that it forces you to manage your time. What kind of a lame argument is that? You utilize time management, for that matter all skills, in your daily life. Want to improve time management? Do school, join sports, start an NGO/clubs— there time management cheaper than IB.

1. Universities prefer IB students more

Okay no. That’s just a marketing scheme and sadly I was caught in it. Do you really think a university will prefer one program over the other? Discriminating against the fortunate and the unfortunate? Please don’t be like me and fall into this trap, schools and IB only want your money, for that matter all programs in this world, Education is a business please get that through your head. My own university says that we compare IB students against IB STUDENTS, so what’s the point?
Ofcourse there are more reasons and ofcourse I might be wrong in some. I would do the IB again if there is more ROI to it, for now there isn’t. I would have saved a lot of mental and financial stress both for my family and myself if I didn’t do the IB. I truly regret taking this program not because it was hard but how unnecessary it was.

Context : whomsoever leaves the company after completing their tenure, they write "POOR" performer in experience letter. HR and an upper management lady gangs up and makes sure the person cant get next job unless they beg to them. If a background check happens for new workplace, cloudstrats doesnt clear it from their side and the person loses job (They want the person to beg to them to clear the BGC). They deduct and never release complete FnF. Its between 0 to half of the amount due from last months salary that too after 3 to 4 months. They also use 24 month non compete clause for joining a competitor company. One cant join a competitor for 2 years.
How can one get out of the trap of cloudstrat and get a job without going through ordeal? Is there a legal way to maintain ones respect after quitting job at CloudStrat. Whether you work for 4-5 years, or just 1, you are doomed to get such ratings as the management lady takes it on her ego that someone quit working under her. The director of the company also supports such behaviour or is plainly ignorant of all the wrongdoings with ex employees.

For some background information I have been diagnosed with Bipolar type I and generalized anxiety. I am a 27 year old female. I have dealt with anxiety my entire life and am currently taking various medications (including divalproex 250mg, aripiprazole 10mg, and sertraline 200mg) to manage my symptoms for anxiety/bipolar. I also take vitamin D and women’s probiotic supplements.
Recently, I had an experience where while I was very high on a Delta 8 edible I experienced severe OCD symptoms including checking and counting, as well as severe intrusive thoughts about hurting myself and my partner. These symptoms lasted for approximately 4 hours.
I spoke with my partner the next day about how I felt and I was very distressed by this experience. I’m curious, do you believe these could be underlying symptoms of OCD or that they were just induced by my use of drugs at the time and I’m just overreacting?

Hi Reddit,
I'm at a loss as to what to do here and need some advice.
A few days ago, my best friend Matthew sent me a screenshot of an ad on Facebook for a car. The ad was put up by his coworker, a guy named Derrin who Matthew was friends with on facebook. Matthew knew I was in the market for a replacement to my current vehicle which is a rusty deathtrap that is leaking oil constantly, and when he sent me a picture of the ad, I was ecstatic. The car was insanely priced for the mileage, but as it was posted by Matthews coworker, I didn't see the price as a red flag. The post said they bought a new car and want to get rid of the old car to make space.
I text Matthew that I'm very interested in the car, and that I'd love to get in touch with Derrin. Matthew writes back that he doesn't have his number, but he'll message Derrin in Facebook and pass along my phone number and let him know I'm eager to purchase the vehicle.
Matthew goes on to tell me that Derrin's a good, trustworthy man, and we both relished in the possibility I might be finally rid of my deathtrap on wheels.
A few hours later, I get a text from Darrin saying he saw Matthew's message and that the car was still available. They sent a few photos of the vehicle and for the most part, they looked great. The car matched up to the post, and the multiple photos were of the same vehicle taken at the same time. I was excited. Derrin requested a deposit of $500, and I accepted. I asked for a venmo account to send the money to and was given an @ handle with someone else's name on it (a woman's). Now, I have couple friends that use one another's venmo accounts, so this didn't strike me as odd at the time. I sent the $500 and was told by Derrin we would be setting up a meet to test drive the car and if I didn't like it, I'd get my deposit back. Sounds great.
I text Matthew that I put a deposit down, and we both share the excitement of a new car for me.
Then comes the next day.
Matthew works nights, and Derrin is part of the day shift that replaces Matthew at 5 in the morning. As he was clocking out, Matthew saw Derrin getting ready for his day shift, so he goes to Derrin to talk about the car. However, Derrin has no clue what car Matthew is talking about. When Matthew showed Derrin the ad, Derrin was shocked. He never put the ad up, and it quickly dawned on both of them that someone had hacked into Derrin's Facebook to put the fake car ad up using his account.
Matthew immediately texts me and tells me to cancel the venmo payment, and briefly explains what just happened with Derrin. I jump onto venmo and open a ticket to try and save my money.
I'm a bit bummed, but $500 is not the end of the world. Other people have been scammed for much more, and while I don't have a lot of money, I'm not taking a massive hit financially.
Matthew, however, feels terrible. He feels guilty for having passed along the ad and giving my number to a scammer who then successfully stole $500 from me. He texted me that if Venmo doesn't get my money back, he will rectify it, meaning he'll likely pay me $500.
Well, Venmo reached out and said I'm shit out of luck and that no payment cancellation or refund would be possible. Now here is my dilemma:
I don't want Matthew to give me $500. I don't blame him at all for sending me the ad. He was just being thoughtful and knew how desperate I was to replace my crappy car. I don't blame him for not seeing the red flags because, even in hindsight, I'm not sure I would have ever seen them. I never imagined someone would hack a person's Facebook to put up a fake ad. How lucky they were that Derrin didn't log into his Facebook sooner to see the messages inquiring about the car. It's brazen and stupid, and somehow it worked.
The only person I blame is the scammer. Both me and Matthew are a victim here, and I don't see why Matthew should lose $500 just because he was being a good friend. I haven't told him yet that venmo can't recover my money, and I don't know if I even should. As far as I can tell, my options are:

1. Tell Matthew venmo can't recover my money and he pays me regardless of my insistence that I don't want it.
2. Lie to Matthew that venmo was able to recover my funds so he doesn't feel obligated to reimburse me.

What should I do here?
Tldr. Friend and I get scammed, and he wants to pay me back my lost money. I don't know if I want it.

hello everyone, i started a youtube channel where i can ramble about shoujo animanga in ASMR. i'm doing this as a hobby and would like my videos to reach fellow shoujo/ASMR lovers.
i plan to make videos sharing my thoughts on anime and manga i read + reading shoujo manga on camera too when i can figure out my set up.
at the top of the list for rambling would probably be A Condition Called Love and A Sign of Affection as that's my most recent shoujo watches.
but i'll also be rambling about older shoujo animanga i grew up with and cherish such as ouran, special a, maid-sama, kimi ni todoke, kamisama kiss etc.
and i'm interested in making a video talking about strobe edge and ao haru ride.
here is a link to my first video which was dedicated to my tamaki suoh nendoroid (i love ouran), thank you very much if you check it out! my next video will be for kyoya which i'm excited abt.

My wife and I are both 30. We both work, and we have a three year old and a two month old. I make about $100k, and my wife will be making about $45k when she goes back to work after maternity leave and drops her percentage down to the minimum that she can do while still retaining full benefits (her benefits are way better than what we would get if we used mine).
We bought a house in 2020, and our mortage is $1600/month which includes property tax. We paid off our student loans when the forbearance ended, and we have no credit card debt. The only debt we have other than the mortgage is our car, which we bought in November and owe $33k on. I know that's a lot, but we had gotten by with cheap used cars for the last seven years, and we wanted something bigger to be able to cart around two kids and a semi-large dog. We plan on running it into the ground.
I have about $100k in my 401k, my wife has about $70k. I've been maxing out a Roth IRA for the last few years, and that's sitting at $30k. I have an Ally investment account that I have a few thousand worth of various stocks, it's kind of my overflow after the Roth IRA is maxed out. I recently opened a HYSA and put $4k in there, and I have about $10k spread between other checking accounts and college savings for the kids.
We're also planning on taking a trip to Italy next year, so my current priorities are:

1. Max out Roth IRA
2. Make sure we have enough money for Italy
3. Pay off car

After the vacation, I'm gonna contribute everything I can to knocking that car loan out.
I'm looking for advice on where to put money after maxing out the Roth IRA. My wife doesn't have one, we use the majority of her paycheck to pay the mortgage. Should we open one for her and contribute to it from my paycheck? Should I invest in other places instead? Should I have more cash on-hand that's not invested? Should I get a financial advisor?
Thanks!

I don’t feel like myself anymore.
This second sem as a freshie, compared to the first, mas lighter workload ko ngayon. Currently nagreretake ako ng math course. One of the other major subjects I am taking are My bio lab & lec which, well, kala ko, mapapanis ko. Ever since talaga my elementary days to HS days, biology was something I considered as my forte, lalo na dream ko magpursue ng med one day.
So with the start ng second sem, I was excited, with bio being there (& my plans to shift to this course), and mej nalax aq konti with math, knowing na, Ive been through this before, I could not possibly fail this again.
Fast forward to present day me, I am on the verge of failing bio & math (again:(). At first it was ONLY 1 failed exam for both, then next thing ik, wala pa akong napapasa na exam, kahit isa. AND I am just so frustrated, sad, dissapointed, angry, & tired.
What am I doing wrong? Nag-aaral naman ako super hard, I am pushing myself to heights I never thought I could even reach, I Fucked up my sleep schedule para lang sa studies ko. Yet, despite ALL this, I am ending up as a failure……
What. In. The. Actual. Fuck Universe.
With all these dissapointing results, there are days wherein, di ako makatayo, nakahiga lang or nakatulala aq from my bed. Nawawalan ako ng ganang kumain. Fuck, I am not even aiming for 1s or 2s, amp kahit tres lang, kahit pang removals, im ok, I just want to pass. I want to be able to feel na my hardwork was worth it. The sleepless nights and my deteriorating health, I wanna feel like kahit papaano, nakapagyield ako ng passing marks in the end.
As for my family, honestly, they are not even that strict, kahit 3, masayang masaya sila. But failing & retaking the subject wholly Is not an option again. After failing math & telling them that I need to retake it, grabe dissapointment sa mga mata nila. They told me stuff bout how yeah, obviously ako very dissapointed cause I was the one working my ass off this only to end up retaking the subject, but mas sila daw ang nadidisappoint(?) like iba daw as a parent yung dissapointment, lalo na carrying the fact na ur child failed overall a subject in school. Hindi daw normal yung pag fail ng isang subject sa college. Siguro I understand (or try to) where they are coming from, but idk, parang a bit unfair lang for me yung thought na, mas sila daw ang nadidisappoint?? Mas sila daw ang may burden na ito?? Like as much as I wanted to scream or tell them na “No, you have no right to tell me na mas mabigat toh for you, na the burden Is lighter on my end, NO!”, I cant. At the end of the day, they are my parents. Anyways yun, idk if maaaccept pa ba nila kung niretake ko tong math for the 2nd time, as they said, and I quote, “this Is the first & last time you are going to let this happen. hindi ito normal.”
So ayun, with all that, I am even questioning myself if I am really deserving of UP. If I am good enough to be a doctor one day, if I am even strong enough to endure it.
Everyday nalang, I feel this darkness looming. Subtle siya sa mornings, but very strong niya sa gabi. I tried to fight it before, the monster of my anxieties & doubt, but lately, I just let it. I let it consume me, I let it beat me up to shit. I am starting to get tired of fighting. Nakakapagod ipaglaban ang isang bagay na, sa huli, ididisappoint ka lang.
Idk what to do anymore tbh.
So yun, thank u for giving a bit of ur time reading this. Di ko man kayu nakikita or kilala, but I am very grateful & appreciative of you:)

Talk about anything music related that doesn't need its own thread. This thread is not for discussion that is tangentially music related; that belongs in the general discussion threads. If you're new here, we encourage you to introduce yourself and tell us about music you're passionate about.
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I have got 88% in class 12th (PCM/PE). In physics I got 82 marks in physics.....which is way less than expected, although I know ki paper was difficult but did not expect -18 marks tbh. Thinking of sending it to reevaluation. Also have got 88 in PE....which I feel should have been around 93. I want to get into managment later on so getting 90 or 90+ matters a lot to me and I worked very hard for it. How frustrated I am of CBSE and its checking is for some other post.
Please tell your opinion, is reevaluation worth its money? Thanks in advance.

So I had my sisters car (she lost her keys house in country) told me if i fons the keys let her know..Long story short me n my friend(the driver) get pulled over by what we were told for investigation of trespassing then it turned in to a legal search of the car since I told him no it was not my car they could not search it and they would I give them my sister's name and number they never called her they continue to search anyways and then it turned into long story short I got arrested the driver got arrested we got arrested for petite theft trespassing 459 and he got charged with possession which they didn't even find anything on him they said that what they were looking for my car they did not find which we told them they wouldn't we the only thing we're guilty of is like I said we were not from the area and the people that we picked up told us to go down that that road everyone went down it well stupid ass listened and we went down it so that was only thing just passing the only thing they were guilty of and we both admitted to that never once were we ever checked for being under the influence we were never tested there's so many things that went wrong that day long story short the car was not only illegally searched never once did they ever tell my sister that her car had been towed she still to this day has not even been told I received anything when I asked to tell company why I was told the reason that the police put was for DUI but I was never arrested and we were the driver were never arrested for none of that is that legal please help tell me what direction do I go in or what do I do I understand I was arrested but it took a toll on my sister and myself seeing being that I do use the car when I go to work and as does she on the and the cops for the 30-day hold for the DUI that they said was reason for the toe also let me see on the 31st day they sold my car my sister's car our car this may not make any sense I'm a little worked up every time I talk about it it's still fresh please help anybody

One thing I gotta make clear: I’ve been listening to this podcast since the “Joey Dickhead” episode. Haven’t missed a single ep since. I jared and Coley are the reason I listen to the podcast. I got love for Steve, and Tyler is definitely on the podcast, but Jared and coley are what keeps bringing me back. With that being said…
I am so fed up with the captain hindsight bullshit from Jared and (mostly) Coley. At the end of the last episode, Steve and Tyler were bringing up great points. We are here, we are riding, we are optimistic, we are excited about the future, and for this season, we got what we got. I’m a fellow Mainer, but coley needs to stop bringing up mookie and xander every 30 seconds when discussing solutions to various problems. They. Are. Gone. Get over it. And Jared, why not be optimistic about the team?? Because “the names aren’t what you wanna see?” Wahhhhh. It’s never been as blatant as the most recent episode, but Jared and coley spewing bastards of boston baseball - type opinions is so tired. I’m not going to stop listening to the pod, I still love Jared and coley, but Jesus Christ who the fuck died?
To Steve and Tyler: thank you guys for standing up to them and being smart, optimistic, realistic, and keeping them in check. Agreed with everything you guys said. I’m not always your biggest fans, but I appreciate your stances.
And before everyone starts saying “wahhh if you don’t like the pod don’t listen” i do like the pod, I care about the pod, and I’m bored right now. Hence this post.

There have been an increasing number of juniors visiting this sub asking for advice about writing essays. Below are some tips and advice for making your essay stand out as excellent. Feel free to ask questions because I will answer every single question in the comments.
I know from experience that many of you are struggling to identify a good topic for your essay. Conventional wisdom says to start by brainstorming a list of potential topics, and chances are, you have already started a mental list of ideas. You might think you only have a few choices for topics, based on your activities or experiences, or essay examples you read, or the rough draft you already started (or worse, that GPT started...). I advise, however, that you put down your list of topics and back away from it. Forget that exists for a moment. Seriously - thinking about this initial list tethers you to certain ideas that might not actually be your best options.
Now you can begin brainstorming with a clean slate.
Start with thinking about what you want to show in your entire application, not just one essay. Every single component in your app has one purpose – to tell more about YOU. Filling out the rest of the application by rote and focusing solely on the essay is short-sighted and will leave so much potential untapped in your application.

It's About You. Tell Your Story - And Be The Protagonist

An admissions officer’s goal is to understand you fully, in the context of your background and the rest of the applicant pool. They will begin this with assessing your academic abilities and potential. Then they will evaluate how you will fit into the student body they’re trying to curate. All of this can be somewhat broad and diverse and touch on several institutional goals. But they will dig deep to find out what each applicant is like, what your core values and motivations are, what kind of student you will be, how you will contribute to the vibrant and intellectual campus community they’re building, etc.
Your goal with essay brainstorming is to ascertain how to powerfully tell your story in a manner that will fit these criteria. The entirety of your application (again, not just one essay) aims to showcase your abilities, qualifications, and uncommon attributes as a person in a positive way. Before you begin outlining or writing your application, you must determine what is unique about you that will stand out to an admissions panel. All students are truly unique. Not one other student has the same combination of life experiences, personality, passions, or goals as you do. Your job in your application is to frame your unique personal attributes in a positive and compelling way. How will you fit on campus? What personal qualities, strengths, core values, talents, or different perspectives do you bring to the table? What stories, deeper motivations/beliefs, or formative experiences can you use to illustrate all of this?
It is always helpful to start with some soul-searching or self-examination. You might not immediately know what you want to share about yourself. It’s not a simple task to decide how to summarize your whole life and being in a powerful and eloquent way on your application. Introspection prior to starting your application takes additional time and effort rather than jumping straight into your first draft. But it is also a valuable method to start writing a winning application that stands out from the stack.
You'll see the advice everywhere that all essay prompts are really about the same thing - you. The goal of each essay then is to showcase who you are, what matters to you, and how you think. I guarantee if you're on this sub enough, you'll hear the advice to "show, don't tell" when writing about yourself. But what does this mean really, and how do you do it well? How do you even get started on an essay that does this?

Introspection Questions

It’s often easiest to start thinking in terms of superlatives, especially those related to personal insights -- what are the most meaningful things about you, and what do you value the most? Here is a list of questions to help you brainstorm broadly before you narrow down your focus for writing:

• What are your interests?
  
• What sparks your curiosity?
  
• About what topics do you enjoy reading?
  
• With whom do you enjoy spending time? Who has impacted your life the most?
  
• Reflect upon “superlatives” in your life. What moments were most memorable, formative, enlightening, enjoyable, or valuable? What physical possessions, experiences, dreams, or lessons could make your superlatives list?
  
• Stop and think about what things, people, or circumstances in your life are really unique, fascinating, or outlandish. Are there any that really have a lot of "cultural flavor" (whatever your culture is)?
  

I have a free introspection worksheet with over 100 questions like this designed to help you find ideas worth exploring in your essays. You can find it on the A2C Discord or download it directly here.

Find Your Story And Arc

Think of a small anecdote or story from your life that you could share that serves as a microcosm of who you are and what is important to you. It will massively help you narrow this down and find a gem of a story if you first start by thinking about your application arc or theme. This is the one-phrase summary of your entire application. It could be "brilliant entrepreneur who started her own successful business" or "talented athlete who wants to study economics and finance as they pertain to sports", or even "avid baker whose hobby sparked an interest in chemistry". It doesn't have to be related to your intended major, but it can help your arc be stronger and clearer if it is.
Once you have an arc determined and a story to share, think about what you want that story to say about you. This is where it can help to think of this as something you would share on a date - what impression does it make about you to the reader? Once you know this, start showing, not telling this attribute of yourself through your story. For example, instead of saying that you're compassionate toward others, you show an example of a time you were compassionate, then elaborate on why, and what it means to you.

Essay Brainstorming Techniques

If you are having trouble finding a story, or simply have writer’s block once you have picked your topic, here are some ideas to get your juices flowing:

• Stream of consciousness writing -- Start writing whatever is in your head, and don’t stop for 30 minutes. You probably won’t use what you just wrote for your essay, but it will help you find a starting point.
  
• Journaling -- Answer the prompt as if you were writing in a journal. This will get you in the habit of writing about yourself and establish comfort with the concept. It will also take you to a new level of introspection and self-awareness.
  
• Twitter X style -- Write several rapid-fire responses to the prompt in 280 characters or less. Choose an idea from these responses to expound upon in your essay.
  
• Read each essay prompt, then go through your introspection worksheet responses and connect the stories and insights to one or more of the prompts. Some students like using color coding to visually see how their different ideas might work together.
  

Why Essays Matter

Here's the thing a lot of people don't realize about college admission: it's not an award for being the smartest, most accomplished, or most impressive. It's an invitation to join a community. Far too many students think that if they can just show that they're smart enough, they'll get in. Yale even says right on their admissions website that 75% of their applicants are academically qualified to succeed at Yale. But only ~4% are getting in. That should tell you that they're looking for more than just top tier test scores and grades. To be perfectly clear, you will need top tier grades and (optionally) test scores to show that you're qualified, and the vast majority of my students come to me with this part already in the bank. But what sets the admits apart? It's personal insight - sharing who you are, how you think, what matters to you, and how you engage community. You can't just say "/IAmVerySmart, please admit me," or even "I did a cool thing guys! Isn't that neat!" You need to go deeper and show them your core values, personal strengths, motivations, aspirations, character traits, foundational beliefs, personality, etc. And you need to do it in a charming, winsome way that makes them like you and want to invite you to join their community.
So how do I get students to do this? All of my students complete that introspection worksheet. We go through it and find the stories, examples, anecdotes, conversations, memories, relationships, and other things from their life that will help us craft a strong and personally insightful narrative. We also make lists of the values, strengths, and key personal qualities we want to showcase. Once we have some topics, outlines, abstracts, or rough drafts, we talk about which stories to tell where, how to tell them well, and what details to include to present the best they have to offer. Then we refine, edit, polish, and enhance over and over until the story sings, but more importantly shows their heart and soul. We also go through all the other application components to ensure consistency, quality, and distinctiveness.
Here's why this works so well: at most highly selective colleges there is a primary reader (or 2-3) who will review everything first and then present it to the admissions committee, who then votes on whether to admit you. That presentation typically goes one of three ways:

1. Total enthusiasm, energy, and excitement. They strongly advocate for admission and paint a clear picture of how you will contribute to their goals and community. Everyone in the room picks up on that energy and is leaning forward in their chairs, looking for reasons to admit you. This is quite rare, generally less than 5 out of every 100 applications, even among those which are "fully qualified." When you do this right, you show depth, meaning, and valuable personal insights so the reviewer is learning about who you are and how you might engage the community they're curating. You come alive off the page as a person, not just another file.
   
2. Business as usual. You're another great applicant in a pile of great applicants. They share a basic review of the facts, your profile, stats, strengths, weaknesses, etc. Maybe someone on the committee finds something they love, and they really push for admission. More likely, not and you get deferred/waitlisted even though there wasn't anything "wrong" with your application. They just didn't love you enough to commit.
   
3. "Here's a stack of 20 applications that I didn't find all that compelling, so we won't present them individually, but you guys are the committee and you make the decisions. So let me know if there are any you want to talk about." In this case, unless there's a letter of endorsement from an athletics coach or your last name matches several buildings on campus, you're probably not getting additional consideration, much less admission. They will regret to inform you.
   

Everything we're doing is designed to help them get to know themselves, present the best they have to offer, and land in that first group. Having top tier essays is the single best way to get there. Get started on brainstorming in the next few weeks so you'll have time to get a few essays completed over the summer.

Enhancing User Management in Laravel

In the ever-evolving landscape of web development, ensuring the authenticity and security of user data is paramount. Laravel 10, the latest iteration of the widely acclaimed PHP framework, continues to offer robust features for developers aiming to streamline user management processes. One such feature is the ability to display a verification status on user profiles, a critical component for platforms requiring verified email addresses for enhanced security and user trust. This functionality not only reinforces the integrity of the user base but also significantly improves user experience by providing clear communication regarding account status.
Implementing a permanent email verification status within Laravel 10 requires a nuanced understanding of its authentication and verification systems. The framework's built-in support for user authentication, coupled with its flexible and straightforward verification process, allows developers to seamlessly integrate email verification indicators into user profiles. This guide aims to navigate through the technicalities of setting up such a feature, exploring the necessary steps to modify Laravel's default user authentication flow to include permanent email verification status display. The focus will be on leveraging Laravel's existing infrastructure to achieve a secure and efficient implementation.

Command	Description
User::find(1)->hasVerifiedEmail()	Checks if the user with ID 1 has a verified email.
Auth::user()->markEmailAsVerified()	Marks the currently authenticated user's email as verified.
event(new Verified($user))	Dispatches an event after a user's email is marked as verified.

Enhancing Email Verification in Laravel

Email verification is a crucial step in ensuring that users provide a valid email address during registration. It serves multiple purposes, including reducing the chance of spam accounts, improving security by verifying the identity of the user, and enhancing communication effectiveness by ensuring that emails reach their intended recipients. In Laravel 10, the framework provides built-in support for email verification through its authentication scaffolding, making it easier for developers to implement this feature without having to write extensive custom code. This built-in feature automatically sends a verification email when a new user registers and provides a route for the user to confirm their email address.
Customizing the email verification process in Laravel 10 allows developers to tailor the experience to the specific needs of their application. This can include customizing the verification email template to match the application's branding, modifying the verification logic to include additional checks or steps, and even extending the default user model to include email verification status as a permanent feature on the user's profile. Implementing a permanent email verification status on user profiles requires understanding of Laravel's user authentication flow, including how to work with middleware, events, and listeners to efficiently manage and display the user's verification status. By leveraging Laravel's flexible architecture, developers can create a more secure, user-friendly application that clearly communicates the user's email verification status, enhancing the overall user experience.

Displaying Email Verification Status

Laravel Blade Template Syntax

 
 @if(Auth::user()->hasVerifiedEmail()) Your email is verified.
 u/else Your email is not verified.
 @endif 
 

Marking Email as Verified Upon User Action

Laravel Controller Method

 public function verifyUserEmail(Request $request) { $user = Auth::user(); if (!$user->hasVerifiedEmail()) { $user->markEmailAsVerified(); event(new \Illuminate\Auth\Events\Verified($user)); } return redirect()->to('/home')->with('status', 'Email verified!'); } 

Exploring Email Verification in Laravel 10

Email verification is a crucial feature in modern web applications, ensuring that users have access to the email addresses they register with. Laravel 10 simplifies this process with its built-in support for user authentication, including email verification. This feature allows developers to protect routes and functionalities from being accessed by unverified users, enhancing the security and integrity of the application. By default, Laravel includes a trait that can be used within the User model to enable these verification features, making it straightforward to implement and customize according to the application's needs.
The process of integrating email verification within a Laravel project involves modifying the User model, setting up routes, and creating controllers and views to handle the verification process. Laravel's built-in notification system is utilized to send verification emails, which can be customized to fit the look and feel of the application. This comprehensive approach ensures that users can verify their email addresses seamlessly, improving the overall user experience. Additionally, developers can extend or modify the default behavior to accommodate more complex requirements, such as verifying emails with third-party services or implementing additional checks before marking an email as verified.

Frequently Asked Questions About Email Verification in Laravel

1. Question: Is email verification required in Laravel 10?
2. Answer: While not mandatory, email verification is highly recommended for applications that require validated user data for security and functionality purposes.
3. Question: Can I customize the verification email template in Laravel?
4. Answer: Yes, Laravel allows you to customize the email template by modifying the notification class that handles email verification.
5. Question: How does Laravel handle email verification internally?
6. Answer: Laravel uses a middleware to check the email verification status of a user and a notification system to send verification emails using customizable mailables.
7. Question: Can I resend the verification email to a user?
8. Answer: Yes, you can trigger the resend functionality using Laravel's built-in methods or by implementing custom logic in your controller.
9. Question: How do I redirect users after email verification?
10. Answer: Laravel allows you to define a redirection path after email verification through the RouteServiceProvider or directly within the verification notification class.
11. Question: What happens if a user tries to access a route requiring verification without being verified?
12. Answer: Laravel will automatically redirect the user to a specified path, often the login page, with an error message indicating the need for verification.
13. Question: Can I use third-party services for email verification with Laravel?
14. Answer: Yes, Laravel's flexible architecture allows you to integrate third-party verification services by customizing the verification process.
15. Question: Is it possible to verify user emails without sending them an email?
16. Answer: While unconventional, you can manually mark a user's email as verified in the database or through a custom admin interface without sending an email.
17. Question: How do I ensure that email verification links are secure?
18. Answer: Laravel generates secure, signed URLs for email verification links, making them tamper-resistant and secure for users to click on.

Wrapping Up Email Verification in Laravel 10

Email verification plays a pivotal role in securing user accounts and enhancing the overall integrity of web applications. Laravel 10, with its extensive support for user authentication and verification, provides a robust framework for developers to implement these features seamlessly. The process, while straightforward, offers flexibility for customization and adaptation to specific application needs. Through the use of middleware, notifications, and custom routes, Laravel ensures a user-friendly and secure verification process. The benefits of implementing email verification are manifold, including reduced fraudulent activities, increased user trust, and improved data integrity. By following the guidelines and practices outlined in this guide, developers can effectively implement and manage email verification in their Laravel 10 applications, paving the way for more secure and user-centric web platforms.
https://www.tempmail.us.com/en/laravel/implementing-permanent-email-verification-status-on-user-profiles-in-laravel-10

yeah. basically I need to vent. and on Facebook I found is&s accounts. happy of his death because he is Shia (he is in the military and was on duty because we still have them in Iraq and the military still needs to keep them in check). that's it that's the post. my heart's aching I don't feel like saying no more. I'm not even making sense.
I should mention that all of the accounts that I've found are from Syria or Saudi Arabia or anywhere except for Iraq. why are they here??