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2024.05.15 18:42 cartoon_Dinosaur Second contact Chapter 2
Thank you to Space paladin for the canvas and u/Acceptable_Egg5560 for proofreading and critique
Content warning; Educator abuse and syrupy love
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Memory transcript: Maarchal , MESEA Astronomers. Date: [Standard Farsul calendar ] January 26th, 3667
PLUNCK
Ponthyts blue stick clattered on the board, rolling around in a circle. Before settling on three. He then pumps his paw and moves to move a soldier that many paces.
“Well, I got you cornered now, whatcha going to do about it?” I smirk at Ponthyts soon to be dashed confidence as I take out my red stick and flip in the air much higher than he did with his own.
It hits the board with a loud clatter, bouncing on each end before settling on rolling. To which it landed on seven. I move my last interceptor through his ranks and take his general. The gobsmacked look on his features was evident, with his previously wagging tail so still it made stone seem fluid.
“I win.”
“How did you do that?”
I rolled my shoulders and readjusted my legs underneath. “Well, you left a clear path for my interceptor.” I pointed to the gaps in his remaining pieces.
“I know that! I mean how did you know you'd get a high enough number to do that? Your interceptor was all the way back here and it's your last red piece!!!”
I lean my head back and lean against the wall behind me. “I didn't, I just saw an opportunity and took it.”
He pointed a digit at me “ Mershit, that was some grandmaster trap!”
I give him the ear position of resignation with a mirthful little grin. “I promise you it was just luck.”
He waves his paw dismissively. “I don't believe you.”
“Well believe it, because I don't plan ahead like that. Want to play another game?”
He shakes his head. “Nah I think four games is enough for one night.” He begins moving the pieces into their containers and folds up the board and places it on top of them. Closing the box. He then stands up and offers me his paw, I use it to pull myself up off the floor.“Well Maarchal, I’ll see you tomorrow at the observatory. I’ll bring the set if you want to play it during lunch if you want.”
I froze, “what! What time is it? He turns over to look at the clock above his strove.
“Ahh about Fifteen minutes past 18.”
“Uh, that's not that late! We could play another game! C’mon let's have a tie breaker!”
He rubs his eyes, “I’m tired and we have work in the morning. Is there something you're avoiding?”
I rub my upper right arm and look off into the corner. “...”
He took on a worried look, “Why don't you want to go home Maarchal?”
I sighed and took a seat at his dining room table. “I… I don't like that house, I’ve lived there since I moved to LIghra six years ago but it's not a… home like here.”
I looked around at the messy abode. Dirty cloaks were strewn about on the back of chairs and the rubbish trough was just barely not overflowing. Paintings either from family or Ponthyts own paw were hanged up in the hallways, and the lightbulbs cast a warm orangish light. While the dishes from our dinner were placed in the sink, covered with animal gravy slathered all over them. It was tidy yet just barely so. A place filled with all the markers of being lived in.
“You've lived here less than a year but it feels like it's always had you in it. I feel … so comfortable here. My own home is so… cold and sterile. I Worked a lot the first few months I moved here. I just never got around to making it a home. It feels so bare, I started to work overtime just to avoid it. Which just made the problem worse.”
He sat down across from me, He put his head in his paws and looked at the scratched wood of his table. He held that position for a minute or two before breaking it and placing his paw on my own. “Maarchal, you are my best friend, I want you to feel comfortable. So if you want you can sleep on my coach, I can also help you make your home feel like one."
I shake my head, “no no, I shouldnt of imposed on you. Making myself feel at home is a job I need to do and have been avoiding for far too long. It's just… it's just so much easier to avoid you know?” I grabbed his paw and squeezed it. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I stand up and make my way to his front door before he speaks up.
“Uh hey Maarchal?”
I turn to address him “yeah?”
He shifts in his seat and fidgets with his fingers. “I’m uh, going to Ootra lake next week. I was wondering If you'd like… to come with me? I promise if you don't have a tent I’ll bring you one. We could have a fire, roast some meat on it and share ghost stories and stargaze… if you want?”
“ What about work?”
He rocks in his chair. “We'd have to call in for a day or so.”
I contemplated his words and mulled them over. It would be the first time I’ve ever willingly taken off a day, tarnishing my perfect attendance. But the prospect of spending more one on one time with Ponthyt was overwhelmingly tempting.
“Sure, I’d love to go. But I haven't gone camping for years so you will need to bring me a tent.”
He leapt from his chair, launching it backwards, before calming himself down. “I’ll take care of all the prep. You just have to come along. I promise it’ll be loads of fun!”
I chuckled while I watched his clearly restrained display as I slowly closed the door.
I could hear him howl with enjoyment as I turned into the driveway to get to my auto.
**\*
“Huff, Huff, you doin alright there Ponthyt?” I turned back to see him walking behind me.
“Yeah, oof I haven't walked this much in years!”
I waited for him to catch up, we sat together when he did and we caught our breath before tuning to make our way back up the bluff. When we reached it there was a stone gazebo made of limestone. The angle of the sun let it shine into it. We walked into it and sat down on the stone benches. I looked around at the lake.
It was surrounded by steep hills with many rock faces visible, the layered stone was clearly visible. The topography of the area around the bluffs was shaped like a bowl, with the sight of land of higher elevation faintly visible in the distance despite its gradual slope. Giving a scene of depth that was not as extreme then in more mountainous areas. This view was normally hidden by the trees below.
“Well isn't this view alone worth the trip?” Ponthyt proclaimed.
I looked around letting the mid morning sun warm my back, I stretched my arms and breathed deeply. Taking in all the wonderful scents of nature.
“Yeah, it's beautiful.” I let myself relax, just letting the sounds and scents of nature calm me like I have never been since I was a pup on an archeological trip with mom and dad.
“Hmm, I've missed this.”
I don't know for how long I had been like this, but Ponthyt broke the silence “Ahhem, so, you've gone camping before?”
I nodded, “yeah when I was a pup my parents would sometimes go off to a site for a couple of weeks and we would come with them. We would have to get homeschooled then. But we would always have to camp and I and my siblings would go off exploring while they worked during the day.”
He smiled and his tail was wagging.” That sounds wonderful. I only got to camp for a couple days a year. It was always so hectic. Me and my siblings would just muck around the camp and eat, sometimes hiking around. Heh” Ponthyt looked towards the ground and held his paws together, rubbing his digits together.
“What's wrong Ponthyt?”
“Oh it's nothing it's-” I put my paw on his shoulder which drew his attention towards me.
“I know that's not true, you can trust me. Just tell me what's wrong ok?”
He gave a look of reluctance before caving to my request “… sigh… I grew up in a big family, and I love them all but… I was born at a strange time. I was second to last of my parents pups. Which meant they were busy with the older ones' events and taking care of the youngest. I kind of got mixed up and forgotten. My interests rarely lined up with the others and I often messed up tasks that my sibling would just fix or do for me. It got to the point that I… didn't really do anything. They will never say this but… I don't think my parents ever expected anything of me.”
I rub his shoulder,” well… I know that you have amounted to something. I mean, you're an astronomer! You work to understand the nature of reality. You're also so… kind and patient. I tried to scare you off but you weren't deterred at my standoffish behavior.”
He turned his head and gave me a shallow but joyous expression. “Heh well living in a house that's rarely quiet leaves you with a high tolerance for stubbornness. '' he wipes away a single tear “Sniff well… should we make our way back to camp? Or can I take out my stuff?”
I shake my head. ”Nah, you can paint. I’ll just sit here and let this place wash over me.”
He smiles and gets up and sets up his easel, taking out his supplies from his bag and gets to work painting the landscape ahead of him. He was slow and each brushstroke was as deliberate as he could manage. He… wasn't very good, only starting out when he moved here. But his drive to get better was admirable. Even in adulthood he tried to learn, to grow, to become more than he was yesterday.
I kept staring at him. Feeling something warm in my gut, something an academic wasn't supposed to feel. Shame overwhelmed me and I quickly turned away. Cursing myself for having those accursed feelings.
**\*
Ponthyt, returned from his cauto (Cargo auto -> pickup truck) with an armful of wood he brought with us. He set most of it aside and threw a piece onto the fire he had started, causing a cascade of embers to fly into the late evening air. The dull purple of the sky cast overhead between the canopy of the trees as the chill of the night began to come in. A pleasant coolness that most would take advantage of to seek the comfort of warming oneself close to a fire.
Not me, I paced to a fro as Ponthyt set up our campsite. He had placed his painting for the day inside the cabin of his cautoa and was now seasoning some raw meat strips to cook on the open fire. Snacking on one or two as he did so. He hung them on the tripod to roast, the fat that dripped off them as they were cooking sizzled as they burned on the coals below.
“I’ll have these done as soon as I can, please sit down Maarchal. Walking like that is only going to make the wait worse.” He says as he prods the suspended meat with a claw like utensil.
“Hmm, ok I’ll just sit and wait. Waste my time. Make a waste of the whole evening!!!” I snapped back at him, throwing my paws into the air.
Ponthyt recoils from my outburst with his ears pinned back. “ We’re camping, there is no way to waste it.”
I turned to address him, “we shouldn't be here! This trip means nothing and we are just wasting our TIME!!!” I cross my arms and scratch at the biceps. Rufflying the fur and making a mess of myself.
Ponthyt drops his utensil and walks over to me. “ We’re together and we spent the whole day just mucking about. How is this any more of a waste than that?” He says as he looks at me with eyes full of worry.
“We’re scientists, academics!!! We don't waste time like the ignorant masses! We should spend our time wisely!!! Every action of connection is just another moment we waste that could be spent to advance our field.” I had tears forming in the corners of my eyes. Scratching at my fur until I felt a wetness on my arms and paws.
“We’re supposed to sharpen our minds! No-not seek pointless relationships! ” I said as I bared my teeth and began growling at him.
The look of betrayal and abject worry he had on his face was overwhelming. I didn't want to hurt him. What am I doing? He doesn't deserve my ire. My legs gave out and I cried into my hands.
Ponthyt walked over to his cauto and brought out a cover. He wrapped it around me and rubbed my arms through it. He rested his head on top of mine while I sobbed. I couldn't take this anymore. Repressing and lashing out at any attempt to connect. Ponthyt hugged me and rocked back and forth. Humming and rubbing on the cover. He was warm and soft. I don't know how long we had been like this but by the time my sobs turned to a faint whine the meat over the fire was well done and the sky was pure black and the stars were out.
“I-I think i’m good no-now.” I choked out. Ponthyt grabbed my hand and helped me stand up. We didn't say another word. He collects the meat and places it on two plates. I stare at my portion for some time, Ponthyt doesn't eat any of his either.
“Sigh… I know you might not want to but… Could you tell me why you said those things earlier?” He says with trepidation clearly miring his words.
“Yeah, it's just… When I entered college It was… not what I was expecting… I was sort of a hyper teen. Always going off about some book I read. Drawing pictures of stars, space stations or colonies we would make on inhospitable planets.”
He sits up and places his plate by his side. “You draw? I’d love to see some of them.”
“I used to. But I haven't since that first year of college.” I turned to stare at the dying inferno warming us. I pull the cover around me tighter.
“When I was doodling before class one day the professor walked by me. He noticed what I was doing and grabbed my paper. I objected but he just stared at me. When he started to address the class he showed it off and mocked me for wasting my time.” Ponthyt turns his head to look at me.
“That's a dick move, But at least he couldn't do the same when you did it in your free time right?” I turned to him with a somber expression. He seemed to understand the implications though he seemed to be confused as to how.
“He couldn't have gotten into your room right? That'd be a huge breach of privacy!!!”
I grabbed the poker and stirred the coals of the fire. “You're right, he couldn't. But he didn't need to, my roommate would take them with her to class and he’d pin them up on the board to mock. I called the staff but since she was my roommate she didn't break any privacy laws and since my art was only ever worth the paper it was on it wasn't even enough to get a misdemeanor theft charge. I tried to hide it but she would always find them. I tried to get another roommate but he stonewalled my attempts and I couldn't afford to rent a place in town. ”
He took on a look of absolute despair. “... How… how could he be so aggressively intolerant of such an innocent hobby?”
I chuckled “It wasn't just mine, a few others had made the mistake of having a roommate with the same professor. I remembered one who loved going out in the woods for hikes. When he found out about that he mocked him for “Pointless exercise and admiring a random assemble of dead and dying shit””. I waved my arms about to emphasize how he inflicted his words.
Ponthyt stared at the ground between us with a look of utter confusion.” … He mocked someone for appreciating nature and being healthy?”
I nodded, “if you were not engaging with study of his topic you were wasting his and everyone else's time.”
Ponthyt looks at me with concern and shared pain. “Why, why didn't you go to a different school?”
I stared at him in his eyes. A scene of shame overtook me. “It was the top class in the country. My family was so proud of me. I was so proud of myself, I didn't want to disappoint them and me. Looking back on it, I realize my own pride was something I rarely contended with until then. It didn't help when he found out who my family was.”
Ponthyt recoiled and waved his arms in a “what” fashion. “Wait, what does your family have to do with this?”
I poked at a log to knock off the charcoal to expose the untouched wood underneath. “They were happy. He spent a lot of time in academic circles so naturally he met people who knew my parents. And the way they described this happy family irritated him something fierce. He gave me such a hard time with it. Mocking me for being a lazy nepotism pick who didn't deserve her seat in his class. He mocked anyone for having any kind of non professional relationship, we never spoke to each other outside of class. We never left or met with friends or family. If we tried too he’d find out and call the one in question a “Lazy sentimental idiot.””
I breathed in deeply, “... that hurt my pride so severely that I just stopped seeing them or any of my friends. I always said I was busy or had a field study, but I was just reading and rereading his lectures. I didn't even go home for the summer breaks, I just apprenticeshiped at his museum to study even more. At graduation he looked so… proud, I only realized he was proud of what he turned me into and not what I did a few weeks after I met you. How I let him turn me into an angry starile shell of a person.”
Ponthyt turned his head towards the fire. His ears straight up and a soft growl in his throat. “... If I ever meet that piece of.. nuclear waste, I’ll kill him.”
He turns to me and his features soften immediately. “Anyone capable of manipulating someone as passionate and creative as you... I can't even imagine the kind of living hell he made you seek…”
I chucked and a slight wag entered my tail.” I’m responsible for my life. MY pride kept me there for him to mold. I hate him, but I hate myself for it too.”
Ponthyt shoots up and screams at me “MERSHIT, Maarchal, you have nothing to be ashamed of. You had a right to expect your teachers to be respectable people. Not abusive and manipulative Sherkires (Ambush insect. Commonly seen as sneaky and unhonorable due to making pheromones and calls imitating other insects mating signals). He starts to speak softer as he turners to address me.
“Even this version of you, so cut off of why you love space in the first place is just.. You are one of the most remarkable people I have ever met. So humble with addressing yourself. You inspire me to be a tenth of the person you are.” He kneels in front of me and grabs my paws in his own.
“You are… you are so passionate, so creative. Even with being a self described shell. I can't even imagine how you will be when you open up again and explore your creativity in full and banish that monster's influence for good.”
I turn and I can't help but smile at his words.”... I haven't been in practice in years. But … I’m willing to relearn it with you.” I stared deeply in his eyes and that feeling again bubbles within me. The feeling of never wanting to leave his side, the feeling as though I found a piece I had been missing. Before I knew it I bit on his snout, recoiling when I realized what I had done.
‘I-I’m so sorry!!! You were just so close and and I felt something and before I knew it-” I was caught off guard when he bit my snout, holding my top jaw between his own set. I bit down on his lower jaw and we locked together. He tried to let go after a while. But I growled to let him know I wasn't ready yet and I used my leverage to lead him into my tent.
**\*
I got up and exited my tent. I stood up and stretched and twisted my back around. Lifting my arms above my head and pulling them as far out as I could. I looked at the coals still burning in our firepit, I could only tell they were burning from the heat going off of them as the glow was hidden by the sun's light. Before noticing the meat Ponthyt prepared last night still on the plates on the log we sat on.
“Pff, hey Ponthyt. Come out here!!!” I said behind me. He crawled out my tent with a head of messy fur.
“Wut ?” He said with half closed eyes and a disposition of utter exhaustion . I pointed to the cold meat. He still had a look of drowsiness before he realized what the significance of the strange strips were.
“Heh, I guess we won't need to make breakfast?” I chuckled as I sat down and hugged his head. I groomed his messy fur as I absorbed the morning sun. I don't know what the future of my career looked like anymore. But it was no longer the most important thing in my life. I loved space, I loved to learn. But In these years I had lost track of what was truly important. As I groomed him Ponthyt fell asleep with his head in my lap.
As I felt the joy of reciprocal love again for the first time in years I leaned back and watched the sunrise, caressing my love's head and breathing in the fresh air.
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submitted by cartoon_Dinosaur to NatureofPredators [link] [comments]
Content warning; Educator abuse and syrupy love
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Memory transcript: Maarchal , MESEA Astronomers. Date: [Standard Farsul calendar ] January 26th, 3667
PLUNCK
Ponthyts blue stick clattered on the board, rolling around in a circle. Before settling on three. He then pumps his paw and moves to move a soldier that many paces.
“Well, I got you cornered now, whatcha going to do about it?” I smirk at Ponthyts soon to be dashed confidence as I take out my red stick and flip in the air much higher than he did with his own.
It hits the board with a loud clatter, bouncing on each end before settling on rolling. To which it landed on seven. I move my last interceptor through his ranks and take his general. The gobsmacked look on his features was evident, with his previously wagging tail so still it made stone seem fluid.
“I win.”
“How did you do that?”
I rolled my shoulders and readjusted my legs underneath. “Well, you left a clear path for my interceptor.” I pointed to the gaps in his remaining pieces.
“I know that! I mean how did you know you'd get a high enough number to do that? Your interceptor was all the way back here and it's your last red piece!!!”
I lean my head back and lean against the wall behind me. “I didn't, I just saw an opportunity and took it.”
He pointed a digit at me “ Mershit, that was some grandmaster trap!”
I give him the ear position of resignation with a mirthful little grin. “I promise you it was just luck.”
He waves his paw dismissively. “I don't believe you.”
“Well believe it, because I don't plan ahead like that. Want to play another game?”
He shakes his head. “Nah I think four games is enough for one night.” He begins moving the pieces into their containers and folds up the board and places it on top of them. Closing the box. He then stands up and offers me his paw, I use it to pull myself up off the floor.“Well Maarchal, I’ll see you tomorrow at the observatory. I’ll bring the set if you want to play it during lunch if you want.”
I froze, “what! What time is it? He turns over to look at the clock above his strove.
“Ahh about Fifteen minutes past 18.”
“Uh, that's not that late! We could play another game! C’mon let's have a tie breaker!”
He rubs his eyes, “I’m tired and we have work in the morning. Is there something you're avoiding?”
I rub my upper right arm and look off into the corner. “...”
He took on a worried look, “Why don't you want to go home Maarchal?”
I sighed and took a seat at his dining room table. “I… I don't like that house, I’ve lived there since I moved to LIghra six years ago but it's not a… home like here.”
I looked around at the messy abode. Dirty cloaks were strewn about on the back of chairs and the rubbish trough was just barely not overflowing. Paintings either from family or Ponthyts own paw were hanged up in the hallways, and the lightbulbs cast a warm orangish light. While the dishes from our dinner were placed in the sink, covered with animal gravy slathered all over them. It was tidy yet just barely so. A place filled with all the markers of being lived in.
“You've lived here less than a year but it feels like it's always had you in it. I feel … so comfortable here. My own home is so… cold and sterile. I Worked a lot the first few months I moved here. I just never got around to making it a home. It feels so bare, I started to work overtime just to avoid it. Which just made the problem worse.”
He sat down across from me, He put his head in his paws and looked at the scratched wood of his table. He held that position for a minute or two before breaking it and placing his paw on my own. “Maarchal, you are my best friend, I want you to feel comfortable. So if you want you can sleep on my coach, I can also help you make your home feel like one."
I shake my head, “no no, I shouldnt of imposed on you. Making myself feel at home is a job I need to do and have been avoiding for far too long. It's just… it's just so much easier to avoid you know?” I grabbed his paw and squeezed it. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I stand up and make my way to his front door before he speaks up.
“Uh hey Maarchal?”
I turn to address him “yeah?”
He shifts in his seat and fidgets with his fingers. “I’m uh, going to Ootra lake next week. I was wondering If you'd like… to come with me? I promise if you don't have a tent I’ll bring you one. We could have a fire, roast some meat on it and share ghost stories and stargaze… if you want?”
“ What about work?”
He rocks in his chair. “We'd have to call in for a day or so.”
I contemplated his words and mulled them over. It would be the first time I’ve ever willingly taken off a day, tarnishing my perfect attendance. But the prospect of spending more one on one time with Ponthyt was overwhelmingly tempting.
“Sure, I’d love to go. But I haven't gone camping for years so you will need to bring me a tent.”
He leapt from his chair, launching it backwards, before calming himself down. “I’ll take care of all the prep. You just have to come along. I promise it’ll be loads of fun!”
I chuckled while I watched his clearly restrained display as I slowly closed the door.
I could hear him howl with enjoyment as I turned into the driveway to get to my auto.
**\*
“Huff, Huff, you doin alright there Ponthyt?” I turned back to see him walking behind me.
“Yeah, oof I haven't walked this much in years!”
I waited for him to catch up, we sat together when he did and we caught our breath before tuning to make our way back up the bluff. When we reached it there was a stone gazebo made of limestone. The angle of the sun let it shine into it. We walked into it and sat down on the stone benches. I looked around at the lake.
It was surrounded by steep hills with many rock faces visible, the layered stone was clearly visible. The topography of the area around the bluffs was shaped like a bowl, with the sight of land of higher elevation faintly visible in the distance despite its gradual slope. Giving a scene of depth that was not as extreme then in more mountainous areas. This view was normally hidden by the trees below.
“Well isn't this view alone worth the trip?” Ponthyt proclaimed.
I looked around letting the mid morning sun warm my back, I stretched my arms and breathed deeply. Taking in all the wonderful scents of nature.
“Yeah, it's beautiful.” I let myself relax, just letting the sounds and scents of nature calm me like I have never been since I was a pup on an archeological trip with mom and dad.
“Hmm, I've missed this.”
I don't know for how long I had been like this, but Ponthyt broke the silence “Ahhem, so, you've gone camping before?”
I nodded, “yeah when I was a pup my parents would sometimes go off to a site for a couple of weeks and we would come with them. We would have to get homeschooled then. But we would always have to camp and I and my siblings would go off exploring while they worked during the day.”
He smiled and his tail was wagging.” That sounds wonderful. I only got to camp for a couple days a year. It was always so hectic. Me and my siblings would just muck around the camp and eat, sometimes hiking around. Heh” Ponthyt looked towards the ground and held his paws together, rubbing his digits together.
“What's wrong Ponthyt?”
“Oh it's nothing it's-” I put my paw on his shoulder which drew his attention towards me.
“I know that's not true, you can trust me. Just tell me what's wrong ok?”
He gave a look of reluctance before caving to my request “… sigh… I grew up in a big family, and I love them all but… I was born at a strange time. I was second to last of my parents pups. Which meant they were busy with the older ones' events and taking care of the youngest. I kind of got mixed up and forgotten. My interests rarely lined up with the others and I often messed up tasks that my sibling would just fix or do for me. It got to the point that I… didn't really do anything. They will never say this but… I don't think my parents ever expected anything of me.”
I rub his shoulder,” well… I know that you have amounted to something. I mean, you're an astronomer! You work to understand the nature of reality. You're also so… kind and patient. I tried to scare you off but you weren't deterred at my standoffish behavior.”
He turned his head and gave me a shallow but joyous expression. “Heh well living in a house that's rarely quiet leaves you with a high tolerance for stubbornness. '' he wipes away a single tear “Sniff well… should we make our way back to camp? Or can I take out my stuff?”
I shake my head. ”Nah, you can paint. I’ll just sit here and let this place wash over me.”
He smiles and gets up and sets up his easel, taking out his supplies from his bag and gets to work painting the landscape ahead of him. He was slow and each brushstroke was as deliberate as he could manage. He… wasn't very good, only starting out when he moved here. But his drive to get better was admirable. Even in adulthood he tried to learn, to grow, to become more than he was yesterday.
I kept staring at him. Feeling something warm in my gut, something an academic wasn't supposed to feel. Shame overwhelmed me and I quickly turned away. Cursing myself for having those accursed feelings.
**\*
Ponthyt, returned from his cauto (Cargo auto -> pickup truck) with an armful of wood he brought with us. He set most of it aside and threw a piece onto the fire he had started, causing a cascade of embers to fly into the late evening air. The dull purple of the sky cast overhead between the canopy of the trees as the chill of the night began to come in. A pleasant coolness that most would take advantage of to seek the comfort of warming oneself close to a fire.
Not me, I paced to a fro as Ponthyt set up our campsite. He had placed his painting for the day inside the cabin of his cautoa and was now seasoning some raw meat strips to cook on the open fire. Snacking on one or two as he did so. He hung them on the tripod to roast, the fat that dripped off them as they were cooking sizzled as they burned on the coals below.
“I’ll have these done as soon as I can, please sit down Maarchal. Walking like that is only going to make the wait worse.” He says as he prods the suspended meat with a claw like utensil.
“Hmm, ok I’ll just sit and wait. Waste my time. Make a waste of the whole evening!!!” I snapped back at him, throwing my paws into the air.
Ponthyt recoils from my outburst with his ears pinned back. “ We’re camping, there is no way to waste it.”
I turned to address him, “we shouldn't be here! This trip means nothing and we are just wasting our TIME!!!” I cross my arms and scratch at the biceps. Rufflying the fur and making a mess of myself.
Ponthyt drops his utensil and walks over to me. “ We’re together and we spent the whole day just mucking about. How is this any more of a waste than that?” He says as he looks at me with eyes full of worry.
“We’re scientists, academics!!! We don't waste time like the ignorant masses! We should spend our time wisely!!! Every action of connection is just another moment we waste that could be spent to advance our field.” I had tears forming in the corners of my eyes. Scratching at my fur until I felt a wetness on my arms and paws.
“We’re supposed to sharpen our minds! No-not seek pointless relationships! ” I said as I bared my teeth and began growling at him.
The look of betrayal and abject worry he had on his face was overwhelming. I didn't want to hurt him. What am I doing? He doesn't deserve my ire. My legs gave out and I cried into my hands.
Ponthyt walked over to his cauto and brought out a cover. He wrapped it around me and rubbed my arms through it. He rested his head on top of mine while I sobbed. I couldn't take this anymore. Repressing and lashing out at any attempt to connect. Ponthyt hugged me and rocked back and forth. Humming and rubbing on the cover. He was warm and soft. I don't know how long we had been like this but by the time my sobs turned to a faint whine the meat over the fire was well done and the sky was pure black and the stars were out.
“I-I think i’m good no-now.” I choked out. Ponthyt grabbed my hand and helped me stand up. We didn't say another word. He collects the meat and places it on two plates. I stare at my portion for some time, Ponthyt doesn't eat any of his either.
“Sigh… I know you might not want to but… Could you tell me why you said those things earlier?” He says with trepidation clearly miring his words.
“Yeah, it's just… When I entered college It was… not what I was expecting… I was sort of a hyper teen. Always going off about some book I read. Drawing pictures of stars, space stations or colonies we would make on inhospitable planets.”
He sits up and places his plate by his side. “You draw? I’d love to see some of them.”
“I used to. But I haven't since that first year of college.” I turned to stare at the dying inferno warming us. I pull the cover around me tighter.
“When I was doodling before class one day the professor walked by me. He noticed what I was doing and grabbed my paper. I objected but he just stared at me. When he started to address the class he showed it off and mocked me for wasting my time.” Ponthyt turns his head to look at me.
“That's a dick move, But at least he couldn't do the same when you did it in your free time right?” I turned to him with a somber expression. He seemed to understand the implications though he seemed to be confused as to how.
“He couldn't have gotten into your room right? That'd be a huge breach of privacy!!!”
I grabbed the poker and stirred the coals of the fire. “You're right, he couldn't. But he didn't need to, my roommate would take them with her to class and he’d pin them up on the board to mock. I called the staff but since she was my roommate she didn't break any privacy laws and since my art was only ever worth the paper it was on it wasn't even enough to get a misdemeanor theft charge. I tried to hide it but she would always find them. I tried to get another roommate but he stonewalled my attempts and I couldn't afford to rent a place in town. ”
He took on a look of absolute despair. “... How… how could he be so aggressively intolerant of such an innocent hobby?”
I chuckled “It wasn't just mine, a few others had made the mistake of having a roommate with the same professor. I remembered one who loved going out in the woods for hikes. When he found out about that he mocked him for “Pointless exercise and admiring a random assemble of dead and dying shit””. I waved my arms about to emphasize how he inflicted his words.
Ponthyt stared at the ground between us with a look of utter confusion.” … He mocked someone for appreciating nature and being healthy?”
I nodded, “if you were not engaging with study of his topic you were wasting his and everyone else's time.”
Ponthyt looks at me with concern and shared pain. “Why, why didn't you go to a different school?”
I stared at him in his eyes. A scene of shame overtook me. “It was the top class in the country. My family was so proud of me. I was so proud of myself, I didn't want to disappoint them and me. Looking back on it, I realize my own pride was something I rarely contended with until then. It didn't help when he found out who my family was.”
Ponthyt recoiled and waved his arms in a “what” fashion. “Wait, what does your family have to do with this?”
I poked at a log to knock off the charcoal to expose the untouched wood underneath. “They were happy. He spent a lot of time in academic circles so naturally he met people who knew my parents. And the way they described this happy family irritated him something fierce. He gave me such a hard time with it. Mocking me for being a lazy nepotism pick who didn't deserve her seat in his class. He mocked anyone for having any kind of non professional relationship, we never spoke to each other outside of class. We never left or met with friends or family. If we tried too he’d find out and call the one in question a “Lazy sentimental idiot.””
I breathed in deeply, “... that hurt my pride so severely that I just stopped seeing them or any of my friends. I always said I was busy or had a field study, but I was just reading and rereading his lectures. I didn't even go home for the summer breaks, I just apprenticeshiped at his museum to study even more. At graduation he looked so… proud, I only realized he was proud of what he turned me into and not what I did a few weeks after I met you. How I let him turn me into an angry starile shell of a person.”
Ponthyt turned his head towards the fire. His ears straight up and a soft growl in his throat. “... If I ever meet that piece of.. nuclear waste, I’ll kill him.”
He turns to me and his features soften immediately. “Anyone capable of manipulating someone as passionate and creative as you... I can't even imagine the kind of living hell he made you seek…”
I chucked and a slight wag entered my tail.” I’m responsible for my life. MY pride kept me there for him to mold. I hate him, but I hate myself for it too.”
Ponthyt shoots up and screams at me “MERSHIT, Maarchal, you have nothing to be ashamed of. You had a right to expect your teachers to be respectable people. Not abusive and manipulative Sherkires (Ambush insect. Commonly seen as sneaky and unhonorable due to making pheromones and calls imitating other insects mating signals). He starts to speak softer as he turners to address me.
“Even this version of you, so cut off of why you love space in the first place is just.. You are one of the most remarkable people I have ever met. So humble with addressing yourself. You inspire me to be a tenth of the person you are.” He kneels in front of me and grabs my paws in his own.
“You are… you are so passionate, so creative. Even with being a self described shell. I can't even imagine how you will be when you open up again and explore your creativity in full and banish that monster's influence for good.”
I turn and I can't help but smile at his words.”... I haven't been in practice in years. But … I’m willing to relearn it with you.” I stared deeply in his eyes and that feeling again bubbles within me. The feeling of never wanting to leave his side, the feeling as though I found a piece I had been missing. Before I knew it I bit on his snout, recoiling when I realized what I had done.
‘I-I’m so sorry!!! You were just so close and and I felt something and before I knew it-” I was caught off guard when he bit my snout, holding my top jaw between his own set. I bit down on his lower jaw and we locked together. He tried to let go after a while. But I growled to let him know I wasn't ready yet and I used my leverage to lead him into my tent.
**\*
I got up and exited my tent. I stood up and stretched and twisted my back around. Lifting my arms above my head and pulling them as far out as I could. I looked at the coals still burning in our firepit, I could only tell they were burning from the heat going off of them as the glow was hidden by the sun's light. Before noticing the meat Ponthyt prepared last night still on the plates on the log we sat on.
“Pff, hey Ponthyt. Come out here!!!” I said behind me. He crawled out my tent with a head of messy fur.
“Wut ?” He said with half closed eyes and a disposition of utter exhaustion . I pointed to the cold meat. He still had a look of drowsiness before he realized what the significance of the strange strips were.
“Heh, I guess we won't need to make breakfast?” I chuckled as I sat down and hugged his head. I groomed his messy fur as I absorbed the morning sun. I don't know what the future of my career looked like anymore. But it was no longer the most important thing in my life. I loved space, I loved to learn. But In these years I had lost track of what was truly important. As I groomed him Ponthyt fell asleep with his head in my lap.
As I felt the joy of reciprocal love again for the first time in years I leaned back and watched the sunrise, caressing my love's head and breathing in the fresh air.
[First]-[Prev]-[Next]
2024.05.15 18:42 spoodydoo “Helping out” feels more like “being taken advantage of” at this point
Prepare for a wall of text, but I need to get this out.
My mom is disabled and on oxygen. She can walk around the house but can’t go most places without her oxygen tanks. I’m an able bodied worker (or I was; I’m currently on leave due to a knee injury and am going to physical therapy for six weeks). Now that walking and moving around is easier for me thanks to rehab, it’s back to the way things were, which are as follows:
-She makes the lists, I do the grocery shopping
-She gives me money for two packs of cigarettes every 2-3 days (yes, she still smokes by going outside and taking her oxygen off), I go get the cigarettes
-She gives me money for her medication, I pick up the medication at the pharmacy
-She adds to the laundry, I do the laundry
-She adds plants to the garden, waters them and gives them plant food, but I tend to them when she asks, such as cutting down dead ones and tying up plants that fall over
-She cooks and cleans, I get her things to cook and clean with (grocery and cleaning supply shopping)
Likewise she’ll often have me do things for her so she doesn’t have to get up and out of her chair, even though on oxygen she can walk, move around and do these things. This includes getting her coffee from the kitchen, turning lights on and off, bagging or unbagging things, filling or re-arranging the cabinet pantry (she has problems bending over due to her weight and back problems), grabbing her things from the closet or clothes from her room, putting lotion on her back after she showers, and cleaning up after myself if she doesn’t like how my room looks.
I’m 24, she’s in her late fifties. I’m finishing up college. I have a part-time job, though she insists I work 2 or even 3 part-time jobs to bring in more money. Half of, if not 2/3rds of my paycheck go in an envelope to be saved because she doesn’t trust me with saving money; if I object or put in an amount she doesn’t like, I get a lecture about how irresponsible I am with money. If I have, let’s say, $300 or more dollars in my bank account she complains that I don’t need that kind of money. Daily she reminds me of chores and things I have to get done; bloodwork, getting new glasses, and doing laundry are all things she’s told me to do literally everyday for the past week, as if I’m not already aware. I suspect I have ADHD as completing tasks that don’t interest me is a huge challenge; when I told her my doctor diagnosed me, she said “ugh, you don’t have ADHD; you’re not hyper, you act normal”.
Doors are not to be closed as she will wander in and out of rooms unprompted. This includes her using the toilet while I shower and coming into my room talking to me while I’m changing and half-naked. She comes into my room multiple times while I’m in bed to talk to me about certain things - she’ll point out that my bedside table is a mess, that I need to tidy up the bed, and that the laundry has to get done.
I’m overweight, medically obese even. Trust me, I see this and acknowledge it. Yet multiple times per month she tells me how I’m still young and should lose the weight now before it becomes a problem when I’m older. She tells me to wear makeup more often because I look pretty with it, even though she has been made aware that I am what I consider masculine and questioning my gender. She says I’m a freak for presenting the way I do, and will only ever always call me her daughter and a name I no longer identify with, (but that’s worthy of a whole new post entirely). She calls me a “fat girl” and is not gentle with her words, but is what she considers “honest” about everything she says. She always tells me that because my dad helps and pays for my phone bill and my car insurance that I am “extremely lucky” and deems me ungrateful and spoiled. (I can’t afford to do that right now, but I’m sure I could if I worked more).
I could go on and on. And for everyone that is going to suggest I live with my father, that decision is off the table. He would only be more aggressive regarding chores I haven’t done and would likely call me lazy for being depressed and laying in bed on my days off. He would also want me off my medication, something I need for my mental health to properly function and not want to off myself daily. Last month I threatened to go live with my father; at 2am she called him up crying and sounding defeated, and he only said that I wouldn’t be able to lay around and do nothing all the time, so I backtracked and have decided to stay with her. My finances and her disability income combined are the only reason we can keep our apartment. Once I leave, she has nowhere to go, and I can’t help but feel guilty for that.
My girlfriend and I intend to move in together within the next year and a half or two. Until then I am at the beck and call of my mother, who says she appreciates my help, where I only feel exhausted and taken advantage of. Despite all of this, I still feel like the villain; like I don’t deserve anything I receive. Like I’m a burden. Like I shouldn’t exist. I just don’t know what to make of it.
(I’ve posted regarding this on the entitledparents subreddit and only gotten put on blast for being selfish, ungrateful and “pathetic”, so I’m expecting it to be the same here too. After all, maybe I deserve it).
submitted by spoodydoo to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]
My mom is disabled and on oxygen. She can walk around the house but can’t go most places without her oxygen tanks. I’m an able bodied worker (or I was; I’m currently on leave due to a knee injury and am going to physical therapy for six weeks). Now that walking and moving around is easier for me thanks to rehab, it’s back to the way things were, which are as follows:
-She makes the lists, I do the grocery shopping
-She gives me money for two packs of cigarettes every 2-3 days (yes, she still smokes by going outside and taking her oxygen off), I go get the cigarettes
-She gives me money for her medication, I pick up the medication at the pharmacy
-She adds to the laundry, I do the laundry
-She adds plants to the garden, waters them and gives them plant food, but I tend to them when she asks, such as cutting down dead ones and tying up plants that fall over
-She cooks and cleans, I get her things to cook and clean with (grocery and cleaning supply shopping)
Likewise she’ll often have me do things for her so she doesn’t have to get up and out of her chair, even though on oxygen she can walk, move around and do these things. This includes getting her coffee from the kitchen, turning lights on and off, bagging or unbagging things, filling or re-arranging the cabinet pantry (she has problems bending over due to her weight and back problems), grabbing her things from the closet or clothes from her room, putting lotion on her back after she showers, and cleaning up after myself if she doesn’t like how my room looks.
I’m 24, she’s in her late fifties. I’m finishing up college. I have a part-time job, though she insists I work 2 or even 3 part-time jobs to bring in more money. Half of, if not 2/3rds of my paycheck go in an envelope to be saved because she doesn’t trust me with saving money; if I object or put in an amount she doesn’t like, I get a lecture about how irresponsible I am with money. If I have, let’s say, $300 or more dollars in my bank account she complains that I don’t need that kind of money. Daily she reminds me of chores and things I have to get done; bloodwork, getting new glasses, and doing laundry are all things she’s told me to do literally everyday for the past week, as if I’m not already aware. I suspect I have ADHD as completing tasks that don’t interest me is a huge challenge; when I told her my doctor diagnosed me, she said “ugh, you don’t have ADHD; you’re not hyper, you act normal”.
Doors are not to be closed as she will wander in and out of rooms unprompted. This includes her using the toilet while I shower and coming into my room talking to me while I’m changing and half-naked. She comes into my room multiple times while I’m in bed to talk to me about certain things - she’ll point out that my bedside table is a mess, that I need to tidy up the bed, and that the laundry has to get done.
I’m overweight, medically obese even. Trust me, I see this and acknowledge it. Yet multiple times per month she tells me how I’m still young and should lose the weight now before it becomes a problem when I’m older. She tells me to wear makeup more often because I look pretty with it, even though she has been made aware that I am what I consider masculine and questioning my gender. She says I’m a freak for presenting the way I do, and will only ever always call me her daughter and a name I no longer identify with, (but that’s worthy of a whole new post entirely). She calls me a “fat girl” and is not gentle with her words, but is what she considers “honest” about everything she says. She always tells me that because my dad helps and pays for my phone bill and my car insurance that I am “extremely lucky” and deems me ungrateful and spoiled. (I can’t afford to do that right now, but I’m sure I could if I worked more).
I could go on and on. And for everyone that is going to suggest I live with my father, that decision is off the table. He would only be more aggressive regarding chores I haven’t done and would likely call me lazy for being depressed and laying in bed on my days off. He would also want me off my medication, something I need for my mental health to properly function and not want to off myself daily. Last month I threatened to go live with my father; at 2am she called him up crying and sounding defeated, and he only said that I wouldn’t be able to lay around and do nothing all the time, so I backtracked and have decided to stay with her. My finances and her disability income combined are the only reason we can keep our apartment. Once I leave, she has nowhere to go, and I can’t help but feel guilty for that.
My girlfriend and I intend to move in together within the next year and a half or two. Until then I am at the beck and call of my mother, who says she appreciates my help, where I only feel exhausted and taken advantage of. Despite all of this, I still feel like the villain; like I don’t deserve anything I receive. Like I’m a burden. Like I shouldn’t exist. I just don’t know what to make of it.
(I’ve posted regarding this on the entitledparents subreddit and only gotten put on blast for being selfish, ungrateful and “pathetic”, so I’m expecting it to be the same here too. After all, maybe I deserve it).
2024.05.15 18:42 Goodnamesalreadytakn Just being optimistic
To all the people with 570 on their transcripts or received those awful 4464C letters, or CPO5 letters who haven’t had any success or help and have talked to completely clueless representative who keep saying 60day this and 60days that . I finally got a hold of someone who “kinda cares” she told me to call the automated questionable credit department 1 (855) 873-2100 to see if there’s anything that I needed to send in that can help get my refund approved and sent to me, turns out they need my last check stubs from 2023 and a my bank statements from 2023 because I’m also a 1099 worker it took me four days to get a hold of someone in that department but just continue to call back throughout the day also, but if you can’t get a hold of that department, you can still just upload your check stubs because 9 times out of 10. That’s probably the problem for most of us if you go to IRS.GOV/reply you can just upload things through there, she told me to make sure I write 2023 tax year all my paperwork and my SSN she said it would take 30/60 days for that paperwork to be reviewed and to upload everything all at once because if you upload it separately or days apart, it restarts the review , but I’ve seen people receive their refund just a few weeks after and also if you don’t have your last check stubs she said you can get a paper from your job with their letterhead showing how much you gross how much they took out in taxes apparently there are some discrepancies between the IRS and some jobs this year. Some W-2s are not matching up with your job is sending in. BEST🍀OF 🍀LUCK🧧 to everyone I know we all really need our funds I’m sending positive energy everyones way and codes 846 on those transcripts and CONGRATULATIONS!!!! your tax refund just deposit to everyone’s bank account 🤞🏾🤑💵💵💰
submitted by Goodnamesalreadytakn to IRS [link] [comments]
2024.05.15 18:41 Flaky-Event-3979 I 28(F) have been dealing with some major regret over not finishing my bachelors and feel like a career in the medical field if the only way to offer myself security, has anyone else struggled with this?
I have posted in this sub before, about a year ago actually looking for advice on animal based careers that paid well with an unfinished bachelors degree. For a bit of background, I left a cal state university about 5 years ago due to some emotional, financial and mental instabilities. I had been in school for 5 years and couldn’t seem to grasp the biology classes I was taking, looking back I realize that I might have a bit of an attention deficit and could’ve probably benefited from some educational assistance but I was too naive to even know that that existed within colleges.
Since then, I have found an ok paying job in commercial property management because I needed to start paying off my student debt and I couldn’t find anything in the animal industry that paid well. I’ve been at this job for 6 months now and it is quickly becoming minimum wage for Southern California as fast food workers just jumped to $20/hr and I’m at $22/hr and the benefits are awful, the health insurance is too expensive and they hardly cover any of it. I originally came into this job knowing that I was only intending to use it as a way to pay off my student debt and that I would leave as soon as I got that all paid off. I am happy to say that I am doing pretty well on that front, I started with $27,000 when I started here and now I am down to $20,000.
I have recently been dealing with some major anxiety and regret over not finishing my bachelors degree and still ending up with all this debt. I have a couple college friends who I’ve been reconnecting with recently who are working on nursing and PA programs and watching their success has made me both happy and regretful for not putting school first when I had the chance.
As this job trudges on, I find myself digging deeper into an anxious hole and I don’t know what to do about it. I got into property management because I had been a real estate agent for 2 years and I figured that this was a good step towards more experience. But this job has been weighing me down as I have quickly realized that my employer does not intend to offer me any promotions or raises and does not intend to hire me any more help regardless of their promises to do so.
I live with 2 of my adult siblings, my boyfriend and my dad and I am quickly realizing that my boyfriend and I will never be able to live on our own with the jobs we have now.
Because of all of this and because of advice from friends that I have that are already nurses, I have considered doing a surgical tech program because most of them take less that 2 years and don’t need a degree. When I was in college, I volunteered at an animal hospital for a few months because I considered pursuing veterinary medicine. I quickly shelved that idea because of how competitive I realized the field was and because of my poor grades. But I learned that surgery interested me immensely and so I am considering these programs because I know that I would have job stability, good health benefits and decent pay.
Although I feel like I have a clear plan, I can’t help but continue to feel all this anxiety about everything that I didn’t do and wonder if my plan is all in vain because I’ll struggle in school like I did last time.
Have any of you ever had any of these feelings? How do you overcome them? Does my plan seem stabile enough?
I feel like I have so many thoughts swirling through my head and I don’t know how to handle them, so any advice would help. Thank you for reading.
submitted by Flaky-Event-3979 to findapath [link] [comments]
Since then, I have found an ok paying job in commercial property management because I needed to start paying off my student debt and I couldn’t find anything in the animal industry that paid well. I’ve been at this job for 6 months now and it is quickly becoming minimum wage for Southern California as fast food workers just jumped to $20/hr and I’m at $22/hr and the benefits are awful, the health insurance is too expensive and they hardly cover any of it. I originally came into this job knowing that I was only intending to use it as a way to pay off my student debt and that I would leave as soon as I got that all paid off. I am happy to say that I am doing pretty well on that front, I started with $27,000 when I started here and now I am down to $20,000.
I have recently been dealing with some major anxiety and regret over not finishing my bachelors degree and still ending up with all this debt. I have a couple college friends who I’ve been reconnecting with recently who are working on nursing and PA programs and watching their success has made me both happy and regretful for not putting school first when I had the chance.
As this job trudges on, I find myself digging deeper into an anxious hole and I don’t know what to do about it. I got into property management because I had been a real estate agent for 2 years and I figured that this was a good step towards more experience. But this job has been weighing me down as I have quickly realized that my employer does not intend to offer me any promotions or raises and does not intend to hire me any more help regardless of their promises to do so.
I live with 2 of my adult siblings, my boyfriend and my dad and I am quickly realizing that my boyfriend and I will never be able to live on our own with the jobs we have now.
Because of all of this and because of advice from friends that I have that are already nurses, I have considered doing a surgical tech program because most of them take less that 2 years and don’t need a degree. When I was in college, I volunteered at an animal hospital for a few months because I considered pursuing veterinary medicine. I quickly shelved that idea because of how competitive I realized the field was and because of my poor grades. But I learned that surgery interested me immensely and so I am considering these programs because I know that I would have job stability, good health benefits and decent pay.
Although I feel like I have a clear plan, I can’t help but continue to feel all this anxiety about everything that I didn’t do and wonder if my plan is all in vain because I’ll struggle in school like I did last time.
Have any of you ever had any of these feelings? How do you overcome them? Does my plan seem stabile enough?
I feel like I have so many thoughts swirling through my head and I don’t know how to handle them, so any advice would help. Thank you for reading.
2024.05.15 18:41 lumpymusclemeatballs advice, support, etc for PAO
 | hi guys im quinn, my bad if this is sloppy as im young and dont know reddit etiquette lol. anywho im 15F (although prefer theythem) and on May 23 2023, i had a PAO surgery on my right hip(pics below, they x rayed a bit much..💀). well long story short they told me everything i could and couldnt do while i was in space from pain meds, and i pushed myself too early. needed surgery again, on july 19th i had surgery #2 and i feel like this surgery messed things up for me in the long run. i mean the second recovery was MUCH easier, but i had insane neuropathy, knee pain, and my incision was soooo annoying. i should add my knees are double jointed and quite literally pop in and out every time i walk so they could just be fucked up all on their own. it scares me because my hip was also double jointed (or so we thought) and it ended up to be my hip was not properly in socket. well now fast forward to last Saturday, i went to my moms house after staying with my dad for so long. i still saw my mom i just dont like my stepdad but it was my first time sleeping over in a long time, and she lives in the country so i was out four wheeling a LOT, lokking for northern lights, went to the river looked for rocks, etc etc. i also got piggy back rides because this is not the only thing that disables me and people know i appreciate help walking if its difficult. i knew all this was going to make me sore. but now its wednesday and my whole right leg+hip hurts so bad, my left knee, and my whole back. i keep having neuropathy flare ups too, i cant function. i have no meds because im on venlafaxine and its supposed to help my hip and neuropathy. OTC pain meds are absolutely useless. i used weed a ton during recovery but now i dont want to be smoking like that at my age and only use it when itll be beneficial to me and i try to only use it past 4pm to keep my tolerance down. well my dad is a big weedie and i did 2 dabs last night with his electric rig after him seeing how miserable i was and i felt a million times better. i could finally go to bed without crying from pain, i stopped throwing up from the pain, i was able to eat after not eating for 2 days(mostly the new venlafaxine making me sick and killing my appetite, but still) my neuropathy was noticeably less intense, everything was just better. so i know weed helps. but i cant smoke all day everyday. i asked about pregabalin through MyChart and my dr doesnt feel comfortable until my mental health is stable. ive been on gabapentin but that stopped working after 10 months of being on it. we have baclofen in the med cupboard but it makes me feel sick the next day. heat helps a lot but the heat gel pack is shitty and wont stay warm long enough, so i made one with rice in a sock but it only stayed warm the first time i microwaved it. thats all i can think of, i guess im just looking for advice, support, people who relate, what helped them, etc etc. thank you all submitted by lumpymusclemeatballs to hipdysplasia [link] [comments] |
2024.05.15 18:41 canadadrynoob Can't Stop. Won't Stop. MoonStop. 🚀🌓
 | submitted by canadadrynoob to Teddy [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/c2irq09gam0d1.jpg?width=840&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=64e5c0da8319f5b8b3f98925f4d44019974a786e After the May 7th (new Moon 🌑) Atlanta meetup, I realized the lunar phases in the San Francisco NFT may be more important than previously thought, so I went back for another look. Previously, we discovered the Gmerica-1 April 15th (first-quarter Moon 🌓) launch date, followed by Gmerica-1 landing on April 23rd (full Moon 🌕). April 23rd also marked the beginning of Passover, which ended on April 30th. The 8 days of Passover are represented by the characters on the bridge. Ryan stylized the NFT in the iconic splitting of the Red Sea by Moses, an important Passover event. https://preview.redd.it/ls2ql1niam0d1.jpg?width=2128&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=44758c695d6691195a346bdd7ffb16fae6d242df https://preview.redd.it/tu871jinam0d1.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=becec958993bcf7461bebd37c946cf73e83b6c12 So we got to the 30th. Where to next? The next lunar phase after April 30th is May 1st (last-quarter Moon 🌗). We can see the May 1st last-quarter Moon represented by the "Power to the Players" sign with the left side of the sign being illuminated. The "No U Turn" sign does not represent a Lunar phase, despite being half-illuminated. The sign symbolizes the Israelites crossing the Red Sea on the 7th night (dark) and 8th morning (light) of Passover. With the Egyptian army in pursuit, there was no turning back for the Israelites, hence "No U Turn". https://preview.redd.it/braxor5ram0d1.png?width=1651&format=png&auto=webp&s=44c9ad03d3028a1a32a7c0067329f68d9dc65ed2 Now we need to make a connection with the final lunar phase in the NFT. Remember RC said "every detail matters", so there must be something to the car race on the bridge. On the weekend after Passover was the May 5th F1 Grand Prix in Miami, Florida. RC showed us in the Teddy books it would be "Game Over" soon after the Grand Prix. https://preview.redd.it/w6i8e2gtam0d1.jpg?width=1790&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=64f27b699e9c4f3815f044e78ac0809062ada086 The F1 Grand Prix finished on the 5th, but the finish to the race on the bridge is the May 15th first-quarter Moon, represented by the GameStop sign illuminated on the right side. https://preview.redd.it/octkqtfwam0d1.png?width=1373&format=png&auto=webp&s=b1f013c24043d218547ea517de5af3d96fb515f1 Now we can fill in a timeline with all lunar phase dates. Only the events of May 15th are yet to be determined. The April 8th solar eclipse and new Moon marked the beginning of the lunar phase countdown. With exception to San Francisco, all of the Gmerica V2 NFTs make reference to the solar eclipse. Larry Cheng's buy may have signaled the beginning of the merger blackout period (Sun "blacked out" by the Moon"). https://preview.redd.it/0pi94sz6zl0d1.png?width=1175&format=png&auto=webp&s=56b17ba83d58ef3929491d1f0e374186316edf9d So what, if any, event is supposed to happen on the 15th? Whether today, tomorrow, or soon, some of us are expecting the announcement of GameStop becoming a holding company and the acquisition of Butterfly (BuyBuyBaby, Lego, WHP Global etc.). Do we have any clues this could be the case for the 15th? Nasdaq requires a 15 calendar day notice for a listed company forming a holding company. Presumably, there would be too many eyes on at Nasdaq for this information not to leak into financial circles. GME started shooting up rapidly on May 2nd. If we assume an after-market May 1st Nasdaq notification, that would put the first effective date for a holding company on the 16th. Is it possible we get an after-market May 15th announcement? https://preview.redd.it/j9guuf9exl0d1.png?width=2012&format=png&auto=webp&s=f8fe9f3c464dfbab6f09fa5d2801996060fbc7ab Remember, every detail matters, and we still need to take into account the double rainbow and setting sun in the background of the NFT. On the second last page of Teddy and the Stock Stand, Kingston and Princeton are told to save their money for a rainy day. On the last page, the Sun is setting and Teddy and the boys go to bed before waking up in the morning to the best stock stand in the world. https://preview.redd.it/iazkq4zw6m0d1.jpg?width=1511&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7e1b8d3887d21082848a2ceb9b068c5d0a33b76d |
2024.05.15 18:40 womensviews_study [Repost] [Academic] Explore women's views on female sexuality and bodies (US, Canadians, 17+)
Hi! I am a graduate student in the Applied Social Psychology Program at the University of Windsor. I am working on my dissertation study, which explores different women's views on how female sexuality and bodies are portrayed in today's society.
This study is completely online, and you can do it at your own pace! All successful completions will receive a $50 incentive!
I am looking for individuals who are women or self-identified females, are at least 17 years of age, and have lived in the US and Canada for at least two years in the past.
To sign up, please take just 1 minute to complete this screener to be considered!
Click the link below today!
https://uwindsor.ca1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_79XKyGc7SvgbJEW
Thank you for your interest and time! Feel free to DM this study account if you have any questions!
submitted by womensviews_study to SampleSize [link] [comments]
This study is completely online, and you can do it at your own pace! All successful completions will receive a $50 incentive!
I am looking for individuals who are women or self-identified females, are at least 17 years of age, and have lived in the US and Canada for at least two years in the past.
To sign up, please take just 1 minute to complete this screener to be considered!
Click the link below today!
https://uwindsor.ca1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_79XKyGc7SvgbJEW
Thank you for your interest and time! Feel free to DM this study account if you have any questions!
2024.05.15 18:39 Contactunderground Monterrey Mexico 1994, there a CE-5 contact team attracted a large craft which hovered on a mountainside. A blinding beam of light emanated from the UFO and the silhouettes of beings could be seen moving in front of the beam.
 | Shari Adamiak was a dedicated, disciplined volunteer contact worker who I had the honor to serve with as a fellow CE-5 Working Group Coordinator from 1992 till 1998. I honor her memory by posting her report describing an amazing encounter in Monterrey Mexico in 1994. submitted by Contactunderground to AnomalousEvidence [link] [comments] In the report posted below, a prolonged telepathic exchanges reportedly occurred with two types of non-human beings, very small ones and a larger humanoid being. Joseph Burkes MD 2024 https://preview.redd.it/3n19p6awbm0d1.jpg?width=344&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2ab154ed65a2403a5660ab1f927065c2b7016ff9 CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE FIFTH KIND IN MONTERREY, MEXICO - DECEMBER 1994 By Shari Adamiak ©1995, Executive Director of CSETI Introduction: The following is an account - from my point of view - of events that occurred during a CSETI investigative team activation to Monterrey, Mexico in December of 1994. While necessarily somewhat subjective based on my own experiences, every attempt has been made to present an accurate depiction of events that were experienced by myself and our team. CSETI Reacts to Flap in Mexico: After seeing a tape of a "Hard Copy" program showing an active wave of UFO activity in Monterrey, Mexico - the third largest metropolis in Mexico - we made an effort to contact the researcher who had taken those videos. Santiago Yturria is a thorough researcher and skilled videographer who, along with Diana Perla Chapa, the host of a popular live talk show on Mexican network television, has had a UFO group for over 20 years in the state of Nuevo Leone. Dr. Steven Greer, international director of CSETI, activated a CSETI Rapid Mobilization Investigative Team (RMIT) to Monterrey to investigate this current flap. Santiago, Diana, and the entire Ovni Club of N.L. assisted us, took us to sites, shared their evidence and graciously welcomed us to Monterrey. Dr. Greer, myself, a woman from New York and a man, also a videographer, from Minneapolis made up the CSETI team. (Names furnished upon request.) Consciousness Connections: Lucid dream activity played a significant role in the events that unfolded in Monterrey. Three of the team had dreams that proved to be portents of happenings on this project. I had a dream in the early hours of December 13th. In it, the extraterrestrials were showing us the spot where we should come in order to have a meeting with them. They showed me aerial views, in stop motion - each one closer to the ground - and marked the site with a strobing turquoise laser pattern. They showed me a view from the ground, looking up at some steep peaks, and showed it to me both in day and nighttime views. The night view revealed two stars in a particular configuration over one of the peaks. That very afternoon, Santiago and his friends drove us to Las Mitres mountains, well known as an area of many sightings of UFOs. As we approached, it dawned on me that it was identical to what I was shown in my dream. We decided to use the spot as our field research site that night. When we came to Las Mitres (so named because the mountain peaks resemble a bishop's miter hat) that night, the two stars were indeed in the sky in the same position as I had seen in my lucid dream. The Team Gets to Work: The CSETI team had observed some anomalous objects in the sky at two different sites on the nights of December 11th and 12th, but the next two nights, the 13th and 14th at the Las Mitres sites, proved to be exceptional. The Las Mitres mountains contain a large cave where the local investigators believe that spacecraft conceal themselves when coming to the Monterrey area. And, unusually dense low clouds were known to form over the cave and other parts of the peaks very quickly. On the night of December 13th, the entire CSETI team set up camp at the base of Las Mitres. We were joined by an American woman who was a friend of one of our teammates, who was married to a Mexican man and living in Monterrey. She had arranged our lodging and transportation for us. Around 10:30 pm, following our first Coherent Thought Sequencing (a CSETI protocol) session, we observed a very bright light that appeared in the zenith of the sky, traveling rapidly in an upward arc that terminated in the center of the constellation Orion. At 10:45 pm, very dense clouds materialized within a minute on parts of the sheer mountain cliffs. The Close Encounters Begin: At approximately 1:00 am, Dr. Greer and another team member were standing slightly down the gravel road when they observed a bright, strobe-like white light to appear at the edge of the mountain. At about the same time, I had gotten up and walked closer towards the brush at the base of the mountain. Dr. Greer looked for me to tell me of the strobe light and found me at the spot where it had appeared. As we stood there, another round light came rolling down the side of the steep slope. Just then, I felt some invisible energy that felt as if it were gently pulling me in deeper to the brush. Both Dr. Greer and I felt there was a presence nearby that, from past experience, led us to feel there was a spacecraft and extraterrestrial beings very nearby. Just then, I began to perceive small, square-shouldered beings in the brush around us. They could be sensed and dimly seen, but a clear view of them wasn't possible. The little beings were extremely shy and reticent. They would scurry close to us, then backtrack quickly into the brush. We could not hear any brush moving or footsteps but we could dimly see them. To me, they seemed to have on uniforms that covered their body and legs that were a dull orange-rust color. They were very short, just up to my knees (I am 5'7"). I became aware of a telepathic message - they were concerned about our video camera, behind me to the right. I turned my head and looked. Sure enough, unknown to me previously as I had not seen it in the dark, was our teammate's professional camera set up on a tripod. I send back the mental message to them not to worry, the camera wasn't on and we wouldn't let him touch it. They seemed to trust my assurance, as the event continued to unfold. I related this two-way communication to Dr. Greer, who went back to the other three people and instructed them to stay where they were unless he called them forward. These rich, rare exchanges with what appear to be extraterrestrial life forms are very delicate scenarios. Any sudden, rash or extreme emotion or movement can thwart the entire event and bring it to a screeching halt, and the extraterrestrials vanish. Sometimes our second-guessing of what is needed to allow an event to unfold in all its possible fullness is accurate; sometimes it is not. It is almost like hesitant dance partners, longing but afraid to get closer. Until we as a people are more accepting of close contact with extraterrestrials, our interactions are likely to continue in this way. I could mentally 'hear' concerned conversation going on amongst the small beings. They eventually conveyed to me the message, again mentally, that they were having difficulty adjusting our energies in preparation for a meeting because my physical energy was concentrated on my stomach, trying to digest some food. Just before all this began, I had eaten about a half of a Power Bar, a dense protein energy food. It was cold and hard from being in my gear bag for hours and I could feel it kind of just laying in my stomach. At this point, I sent a very deliberate message to the life forms: "I give you permission to take it out of my body". Suddenly, I felt as if someone were standing some distance away with a fishing line whose hook was inside my stomach. It felt as if someone were slowing reeling in the line as the food came back out the way it went in. Now, I detest vomiting more than almost anything and I was struck by the gentleness that was used in removing this food from my body. It was only mildly unpleasant. Dr. Greer, an emergency physician, asked me if I was alright. I told him that I was fine and that this was being done with my permission. After this little purging, the energy felt softer, with less intense vibration. Soon the little beings sent both Dr. Greer and I the message that if we removed our glasses, we would be able to see them better. Although I normally use contact lenses, glasses are preferable for field work when wind and dust often get blown into my eyes, plus the fact that we are often in the field until the wee hours of the morning. After receiving this message, we each removed our glasses. One last request from the little ETs - that we remove our hats (it had been a chilly night.) At this point, I could actually feel a harmonious flow of energy between us, the little beings, and some other unseen source. Another Being is Perceived: At this point, the small life forms disappeared. Shafts of golden light began to come from an unknown, unseen source and lay across the bushes in front of us. We learned later that the three other team members behind us could see this as well, although they had not been able to perceive the small beings. I could feel one of these shafts of light approach me and fill my torso with a warm, golden glow. After the light rays faded, a large oval of bluish fog began to form about ten feet in front of us. As the blue mist began to coalesce, Dr. Greer and I became aware of a being within it. Although again we could see him only dimly, he appeared very humanoid, tall, with long and straight silverish hair. He appeared to be clothed in a light blue and silver uniform. We learned later that one team member saw a tendril of the blue fog travel along the ground towards her. It frightened her a little until the mist reached her foot and began to send wisps around her feet. She later told us that there was a gentle kindness about the fog and all misgivings vanished. However, our American friend who was not an actual team member became very frightened by the golden light and blue fog. We learned later that it was all too much for her - something the extraterrestrial would tell us. For as we stood there facing one another, the tall being sent us a message that they would very much like to manifest more fully in the physical to meet with us, but that if they did so, one of our team members would be dangerously frightened. Their caution and concern were touching. And a far cry from the crying wolf that goes on so often when extraterrestrials are said to be heartless, devoid of feeling, and out to harm human beings. We in CSETI feel that this type of encounter points up the absolute need and appropriateness of doing real-time field work in our efforts to learn exactly what these beings are all about. It is important, and interesting, to note that both Dr. Greer and myself received nearly identical mental messages each time there was a communication from the extraterrestrial. Dr. Greer and I consulted one another and decided to send a joint message. We told the tall being that if they could not come to us, it was okay with us if they could take us to where they were. We could sense this was being discussed with a 'central command control', or his more senior team members. Dr. Greer and I saw a copper-gold sphere, ten to twelve feet in diameter, begin to coalesce to the left of the tall being. It never reached material solidity but soon began to disperse. The tall being then sent us a message that it would frighten our teammates just as much to see us disappear in front of their eyes as it would for the ETs to manifest right there. At this time, we had no idea that any member of our team was having difficulty coping with these events. Soon Again, Soon Again: Finally, after what seemed like a few moments, the tall being sent us a message that they would not be able to manifest fully in the physical this night. But they sent a message: "soon again; soon again". At this point, Dr. Greer went back to speak with the other team members and I stayed put. For the next five minutes, the being and I exchanged blessings to each other, to our teams. It was poignant and lovely. I cannot recall any of the actual 'words' or specific communications; it was not a left-brained exchange, but was beyond the bounds of linear thought. Their Reluctance is Proven Out: When I joined the others, I learned that our American friend had become extremely frightened, so much so that she had taken refuge in our vehicle. We had designated the big Suburban as the 'safe area". We do this on all our field research - setting aside a specific enclosure that any team member can go to if unfolding events prove fearful to them. In fact, it is our policy to send a 'buddy' along, who remains with them the entire time they wish to stay in the safe area. We divide into buddies at the beginning of our field session so that each team member is accounted for, and accountable, at all times. She told us that if she had seen anything more from the ETs, she would have run screaming down the mountainside. Preparation is Key: Her reactions impressed upon us the importance of training for each team member. It served as a strong reminder to us to be more stringent in adherence to our policies regarding untrained guests who wanted to join our field work. Much to my surprise, Dr. Greer and I learned from our teammates that we had been standing there, exchanging communication with the extraterrestrials, for nearly two hours. We both thought no more than thirty minutes had elapsed. By this time, it was nearly 3:00 am, so we broke camp and went home. The Encounters Continue: The following day was a busy one with an appearance on Diana Chapa's live TV show in the morning, a field trip to another site in the afternoon, and a talk at the Ovni Club that evening. It was about 11:30 pm by the time we were driving up the narrow road to our Las Mitres site. Interestingly, our videographer teammate was absent from field work. He had decided to stay in the city to visit his friend and her son. As the Suburban headed up the gravel lane, Dr. Greer and I simultaneously observed a small, bright light on the side of Las Mitres. We knew from the previous night that there was no light normally in that area. Tonight we also had with us our American friend's Mexican husband. He and our driver assured us there were no houses, no power lines, no roads, nothing on the sheer cliffs of Las Mitres. As we came to the base of the mountain, Dr. Greer jumped from the Suburban while it was still rolling. The other woman and I jumped out and grabbed the bare necessities of field gear: a 500,000-candle power portable halogen light, our night vision scope, binoculars, a small camcorder, and a hand-held micro-cassette recorder. Because of the reaction by an untrained participant the previous night, we sent our driver and his friend down the road. We told them we could not afford any panic this night. Unbeknownst to us at the time, the men went to a spot at the bottom of the road where they could clearly see the events that unfolded. Are We in a Spielberg Movie?: Dr. Greer grabbed the halogen light and sent a signal to the star-like light on the hillside. Instantly, the light transformed into a gigantic, brilliant round beam that shot light down the entire mountainside! We were astonished. It came close to being the time we always joke about - when events are so incredible that we'll wish we had on "Depends" undergarments! We continued to have a Close Encounter of the Fifth Kind - a human-initiated or human-interactive experience - with this craft for the next two hours and fifteen minutes. An exchange like this, with a team in the field, is unprecedented. During the lengthy encounter, we sent light signals to the craft. The craft would signal back to us in the exact same sequence. Then its lights would extinguish. Within a few minutes, it would again illuminate and initiate a signal to us. This went on and on. Twice during this time period, we saw the shadows of beings walking in front of the blinding beam. At times, the beam would rotate upon itself, appearing to the left of its original position - then back where it was. Once the light seemed to turn over on itself, illuminating the sparsely forested slope behind it. This was one of the times when figures were seen to move in the beam. Hoaxability Ration - Low to Zero: It must be emphasized that this is a very remote area devoid of roads. For anyone to have hoaxed this event would have required something on the scale of a major motion picture crew. There was simply no way to have moved equipment like this onto these sheer slopes. It would have caused quite a commotion in the suburbs below if a crew of that magnitude had traversed those sheer cliffs that day. The area would have been swarming with lookie-loos. At the end of the two hours and fifteen minutes, the light, which by now had split into two candle-flame colored round lights, turned to brilliant red, shot out a lightning bolt of energy and vanished. We saw a golden streak shoot through the sky towards the direction of the ancient volcano, Topochico. And the energy was gone. It was not until this point that we fully appreciated that
As a side note, I want to report that when we first got out of the vehicle at the base of the mountain, I heard crickets chirping in stereophonic synchronicity. One would chirp on our right, then one would chirp on our left. The chirping was loud and distinct. When I heard it, I told my teammates that it was significant. I had heard similar chirping prior to another major encounter in the past. It was moments later that the gigantic craft illuminated before us. Eventful Trip Home: We signaled to our drivers to bring up the Suburban. When they arrived, we learned that the men had gone to a vantage point and had seen everything, giving us two independent witnesses. In fact, from their extra distance the light was not so blinding and they were able to discern the craft. They both reported seeing a very large disc-shaped craft with a domed top. The men were extremely excited. They said they felt bonded now, like brothers. The American's husband said that his life would never be the same again. As we were riding on our 30-minute drive home, Dr. Greer remarked that he felt the ETs would follow us. Within a minute, the man in front was exclaiming, "la luz, la luz!" (the light, the light!) We could then see that the gigantic light was visible from the road, showing itself to us on the opposite side of the mountain from where it had been at our field site! We stopped at a closed gas station, signaled and videoed (which came out fuzzy and blurred). You will recall that, of all nights, our videographer was not with us this night. Coincidence or orchestrated by the ETs? So many such things happen that we have to ponder the possibility. This time, the light was not appearing as two lights side by side. Instead, they were two lights stacked one on top the other. We continued to observe it on the remainder of the homeward ride, stopping twice more to observe. When we arrived home, we climbed up to our flat roof. We could still see it, even though the entire valley of the city of Monterrey was now between us, the back side of Las Mitres and the rest of the range. The lights were still there. They had changed position again and were now staggered, one atop the other. They had been so bright that we could see the rock face behind it illuminated. As we watched, the lights dimmed down to about half their luminosity. The Craft Revealed: At this point, we could clearly see the structure of the craft. It was indeed a large disc with a sloped dome on top. By measuring with fingers at arm's length, Dr. Greer determined that the craft was between one-half to one full city block in size. As the birds began to sing and the sky began to lighten, we bid goodbye and heartfelt thanks to our visitors for these remarkable experiences and went inside to sleep, and dream of them. Shari Adamiak, Executive Director, CSETI ________________________ Final Notes: I wish to advise that the three persons who interacted with the craft as described above included three very responsible and stable individuals. Dr. Greer is a practicing trauma physician, father of four, world-renowned expert on extraterrestrial intelligence. He is the founder of CSETI, and the visionary and guiding force of it. Our teammate from New York is cofounder of a research foundation and is personal friends with world leaders in both the political and private sectors. And I myself have been educated in the sciences and the law and worked for many years as a paralegal, which gives me a logical mind upon which to base my ongoing extraterrestrial experiences. - Shari Adamiak I describe how I first met Shari in 1992. It was an experience that I will never forget: https://contactunderground.wordpress.com/2022/03/05/i-meet-shari-adamiak-the-first-ce-5-working-group-coordinato |
2024.05.15 18:39 Undyingcactus1 The goat story
As they settle into domestic life in the cave, Peeta prompts Katniss for a story, which she likens to singing, an activity she views as superfluous but connected to her father, and, as of recently, Rue. Peeta, the artist, and Katniss, the utilitarian.
The goat story provides important insight into Katniss’ background and their world on multiple counts:
The first half of the entire story is an internal monologue, not spoken out loud, to protect Greasy Sae, Rooba the butcher, and even the peacekeepers from punishment for breaking the laws by engaging in the black market. Katniss’ awareness that the audience will have already figured she was illegally hunting but her refusal to implicate anyone demonstrates her nature as a protector and the need for mutual silence within District 12. I doubt anyone from District 12, regardless if they are from the Seam, town, or a peacekeeper, would say any of the first half of the story out loud. It is their mutual silence, their mutual dependence, their mutual aid that protects them all. The black market is an integral part of their economy and way of life.
Gale and Katniss shoot down a young buck and Katniss describes him in detail, remarking on his youth, beauty, unfamiliarity with humans, and innocence. Her description calls to mind the tributes themselves, innocent children. We learn it is Greasy Sae, a trader at the Hob, who seems to be well-respected within their community, that refers them to a butcher in town. Greasy Sae could certainly use the buck for her stews, but she clearly has Katniss’ and Gale’s best interests in mind and wants them to get the highest price for their kill. The Hob operates on goodwill and trust between the traders with Katniss and Gale being established and well-regarded members of their ranks.
They take the buck to Rooba, the butcher in town. Katniss and Gale have crossed the threshold of the Hob, where haggling is the way of commerce, and into town with Rooba where the merchant class controls trade. The pair receive the most money they have ever had at one time and head for the market square.
From here, Katniss narrates the story out loud directly to Peeta and indirectly to Panem, claiming she traded her mother’s old locket in for money. She is drawn to the Goat Man’s injured goat, noting how owning a goat can change your life in 12. I find it a bit amusing how nonchalant Katniss and Gale try to be while sizing up the goat, even buying a cup of milk, but the Goat Man insists she is for the butcher. When Rooba shows up, she complains of the goat’s worsened state, then leaves with a wink to Katniss. The crowd joins in the haggling between the Goat Man and Katniss.
Rooba’s shenanigans and the involvement of the crowd show how invested the communities of 12 are in Katniss from even before the reaping. We see over and over her suspicious nature blinds her to the perceptions of others. She is taken aback by the salute she receives at the reaping, but as we learn over the course of the books, District 12 respects and admires her. We hear this explicitly from Delly, in Mockingjay, but more subtly in this story. Katniss denies that Madge is her friend, denies that she would get generous trades on her own merit instead of her father’s or Prim’s reputations, denies that the people of District 12 care for her. Her years of trading across the lines that divide 12, interacting with the people of the Seam, the town, and the peacekeepers and officials means she is one of the few that would be known to almost everyone. Almost everyone in 12, besides Haymitch, is aware of her dedication to providing for her family. Katniss interprets the “effect she can have” that Peeta refers to as pity and an insult, but really, it is anything but. I’ll bet NO ONE from 12 was surprised when Katniss volunteered. Katniss’ inner dialogue throughout the games show how profoundly the watchers of 12 influence her decisions and how it is distinctive from the influence of the watchers of the Capitol. She knows she would be ostracized in 12 if she didn’t ally with Peeta after the rule change, and she knows she would never accept anyone back into 12 if they didn’t do the same.
Gale carries the goat back, because, according to Katniss, ‘he wanted to see the look on Prim’s face as much as I did’. This line tears me up knowing what is coming in Mockingjay.
Katniss has a very rare show of sentimentality here by buying a ribbon for the goat to present to Prim. The conversation between Katniss and Peeta after she tells this story never fails to crack me up. Peeta KNOWS this story is the happiest in Katniss’ life because of the ‘lasting joy you gave the sister you love so much you took her place in the reaping’ but she insists that the goat was a ‘little gold mine’. Their banter here is why we are all Everlark shippers.
Thanks for reading! Please share your thoughts on the goat story
submitted by Undyingcactus1 to Hungergames [link] [comments]
The goat story provides important insight into Katniss’ background and their world on multiple counts:
- The relationship between Katniss, Gale, and District 12
- Dynamics of the Hob, town, and officials
- Katniss’ personality
The first half of the entire story is an internal monologue, not spoken out loud, to protect Greasy Sae, Rooba the butcher, and even the peacekeepers from punishment for breaking the laws by engaging in the black market. Katniss’ awareness that the audience will have already figured she was illegally hunting but her refusal to implicate anyone demonstrates her nature as a protector and the need for mutual silence within District 12. I doubt anyone from District 12, regardless if they are from the Seam, town, or a peacekeeper, would say any of the first half of the story out loud. It is their mutual silence, their mutual dependence, their mutual aid that protects them all. The black market is an integral part of their economy and way of life.
Gale and Katniss shoot down a young buck and Katniss describes him in detail, remarking on his youth, beauty, unfamiliarity with humans, and innocence. Her description calls to mind the tributes themselves, innocent children. We learn it is Greasy Sae, a trader at the Hob, who seems to be well-respected within their community, that refers them to a butcher in town. Greasy Sae could certainly use the buck for her stews, but she clearly has Katniss’ and Gale’s best interests in mind and wants them to get the highest price for their kill. The Hob operates on goodwill and trust between the traders with Katniss and Gale being established and well-regarded members of their ranks.
They take the buck to Rooba, the butcher in town. Katniss and Gale have crossed the threshold of the Hob, where haggling is the way of commerce, and into town with Rooba where the merchant class controls trade. The pair receive the most money they have ever had at one time and head for the market square.
From here, Katniss narrates the story out loud directly to Peeta and indirectly to Panem, claiming she traded her mother’s old locket in for money. She is drawn to the Goat Man’s injured goat, noting how owning a goat can change your life in 12. I find it a bit amusing how nonchalant Katniss and Gale try to be while sizing up the goat, even buying a cup of milk, but the Goat Man insists she is for the butcher. When Rooba shows up, she complains of the goat’s worsened state, then leaves with a wink to Katniss. The crowd joins in the haggling between the Goat Man and Katniss.
Rooba’s shenanigans and the involvement of the crowd show how invested the communities of 12 are in Katniss from even before the reaping. We see over and over her suspicious nature blinds her to the perceptions of others. She is taken aback by the salute she receives at the reaping, but as we learn over the course of the books, District 12 respects and admires her. We hear this explicitly from Delly, in Mockingjay, but more subtly in this story. Katniss denies that Madge is her friend, denies that she would get generous trades on her own merit instead of her father’s or Prim’s reputations, denies that the people of District 12 care for her. Her years of trading across the lines that divide 12, interacting with the people of the Seam, the town, and the peacekeepers and officials means she is one of the few that would be known to almost everyone. Almost everyone in 12, besides Haymitch, is aware of her dedication to providing for her family. Katniss interprets the “effect she can have” that Peeta refers to as pity and an insult, but really, it is anything but. I’ll bet NO ONE from 12 was surprised when Katniss volunteered. Katniss’ inner dialogue throughout the games show how profoundly the watchers of 12 influence her decisions and how it is distinctive from the influence of the watchers of the Capitol. She knows she would be ostracized in 12 if she didn’t ally with Peeta after the rule change, and she knows she would never accept anyone back into 12 if they didn’t do the same.
Gale carries the goat back, because, according to Katniss, ‘he wanted to see the look on Prim’s face as much as I did’. This line tears me up knowing what is coming in Mockingjay.
Katniss has a very rare show of sentimentality here by buying a ribbon for the goat to present to Prim. The conversation between Katniss and Peeta after she tells this story never fails to crack me up. Peeta KNOWS this story is the happiest in Katniss’ life because of the ‘lasting joy you gave the sister you love so much you took her place in the reaping’ but she insists that the goat was a ‘little gold mine’. Their banter here is why we are all Everlark shippers.
Thanks for reading! Please share your thoughts on the goat story
2024.05.15 18:37 ArcticWarrior195 The true issue with balancing is that too many weapon identities overlap and many roles are performed better by other options (and some ideas on how to fix them)
An issue I've begun to notice as more weapons have been introduced or changed, many simply are downgrades or are performing their role worse then other weapons. The Liberator Concussive is worse then the Pummeler, the Tenderizer is worse then the Liberator, the Breaker Spray&Pray is worse then the Breaker Incendiary, the Purifier is worse then the Scorcher, the Liberator Penetrator is worst then the Adjudicator, and so much more. The issue is that we have too many weapons performing the same role without diversifying these weapon enough to allow them to perform these roles differently then another. Why change the Exploding Crossbow to a "medium armor killer" type weapon when it offers nothing new that the Dominator, Slugger, and Eruptor already do to fulfil this role? Why change the Adjudicator to a medium armor penetration assault rifle when the Liberator Penetrator already exists? Why add the Tenderizer as a "assault rifle with a restrictive magazine but more stopping power" when that describes the role the Adjudicator already has? Too many weapons have been adjusted, added or changed, causing overlap issues between many weapons, which in turn have weapons be outperformed rather then be a proper side-grade. I understand not wanting to have primary weapons be too powerful, but too many weapons have been made redundant by nerfs, buffs, and changes because of this. Therefore, I wanted to throw out my ideas for weapon changes/balancing. When I was considering weapon balancing, I had four goals:
AR-23 Liberator
AR-23P Liberator Penetrator
AR-61 Tenderizer
AR-23C Concussive
BR-14 Adjudicator
SG-225SP Breaker Spray&Pray
submitted by ArcticWarrior195 to Helldivers [link] [comments]
- Give each weapon a defined purpose and role
- Make sure each weapon is an overall side-grade
- Prioritize making new roles to avoid overlap
- Try to have some slight realism
AR-23 Liberator
- Damage: 60 - Capacity: 45 - Recoil: 15 - Fire Rate: 640 - Light Armor Penetrating - 7 + 1 Mags - Role: All-around workhorse and baseline weaponNotes: The AR-23 Liberator in its current state serves as a perfect baseline when considering balance changes. Strong, reliable, accurate, ammo efficient, multiple firing modes and scope magnifications, it's everything a starter weapon should be and needs no additional changes.
AR-23P Liberator Penetrator
- Damage: 45 - Capacity: 30 - Recoil: 19 - Fire Rate: 640 - Medium Armor Penetrating - 10 + 1 Mags - Role: Takes down armored targetsNEW STATS
- Damage: 55 - Capacity: 45 - Recoil: 28 - Fire Rate: 500 - Medium Armor Penetrating - 7 + 1 Mags - Reduced Ergonomics - New Role: Heavy assault rifle fitted with armor piercing rounds but has reduced fire rate and increased recoilNotes: Oh my poor baby boy, how Arrowhead has treated and abandoned you so. The AR-23P Liberator Penetrator is my favorite looking gun in the game, but from day one has been completely underpowered and underperforms in its role as a medium armor penetration assault rifle. Between its terrible damage, small capacity, and terrible efficiency, the weapon struggled against the competition and the only buff added was the addition to fire in full-auto, which barely did anything to change its lackluster performance. With these new changes, the Penetrator would now become a much stronger option compared to what it was then. First, we increase the damage and capacity to bring it up to it's standard counterpart, as there's no reason why it should have both a low capacity and the lowest damage per shot in the game. However to keep a bit of realism, we'll still have it be weaker as armor piercing rounds tend to have less stopping power for increased penetration power. And second, we give it increased recoil along with reduced fire rate, ergonomics, and spare ammo to compensate for these changes while also leaning into the heavy rifle design and new role it has. With these changes, the Penetrator is more closer to how the Adjudicator is and now should feel more like a side-grade to the standard Liberator, trading in crowd control for better performance against larger armored targets. It'll blast through the likes of Hive Guards, Brood Commanders, and Bile Spewers, but will struggle against groups of Hunters and Berserkers due to its lower fire rate and ergonomics.
AR-61 Tenderizer
- Damage: 60 - Capacity: 35 - Recoil: 10 - Fire Rate: 600 - Light Armor Penetrating - 10 + 1 Mags - Role: High-caliber assault rifle with a restrictive magazine but more stopping powerNEW STATS
- Damage: 40 - Capacity: 60 - Recoil: 20 - Fire Rate: 720 - Light Armor Penetrating - 7 + 1 Mags - Slightly Reduced Ergonomics - New Role: Rapid-fire high capacity assault rifle with low damage and increased recoilNotes: This weapon is too similar to the original Liberator and desperately needs some adjustments. And with the new Penetrator changes from before, we now need to alter this weapons from it's original role to something that's missing from the assault rifles list. Enter the new AR-61 Tenderizer. This weapon is focused on one thing: throwing down as many bullets down range as fast as possible. With a massive capacity and increased fire rate, this weapon is the closest we'll get to having a primary LMG and should be thought of as the Breaker but in assault rifle form. The gun can handle larger crowds and can shred through light armored targets such as Berserkers, Nursing Spewers, Stalkers, and Warriors. However it will eat through ammo quickly, struggle against armored enemies, and isn't particularly precise so it'll be difficult to hit the weak points of certain enemies such as Devastators. It certainly won't replace a Stalwart, but you'll still get the lovely feeling of unloading a torrent of bullets upon the enemies of democracy all the same. It also doesn't replace the Breaker either, as while the Breaker can unload into a group indiscriminately and tear through hordes faster, the Tenderizer has better range and has more control over the area where their shots will land.
AR-23C Concussive
- Damage: 65 - Capacity: 30 - Recoil: 28 - Fire Rate: 320 - Light Armor Penetrating - 10 + 1 Mags - Role: Fires concussive rounds that do less damage but stagger enemiesNEW STATS
- Damage: 55 - Capacity: 35 - Recoil: 28 - Fire Rate: 400 - Light Armor Penetrating - 9 + 1 Mags - Concussive rounds explosions have a small AOE, allowing for stagger of several enemies close together per shot - Explosions deal no damage and purely stagger. Helldivers hit by the concussive explosions will suffer from a depletion of stamina and a slow effect that fades after a few seconds - New Role: Fires concussive rounds at a slower fire rate that do less damage, but can stagger several enemiesNotes: With the release of the new Pummeler SMG, the AR-23C Concussive has been made completely redundant in almost every way. Because of this, we have two options: nerf the Punisher or buff the Concussive. I choose the latter, and so this is what we get. As the concussive rounds are stated to do less damage, we'll first sightly nerf the damage to make this accurate. Second, we slightly increase the capacity and give a small bump to its fire rate to make it a bit more usable, while also taking away a spare mag to compensate. And now onto the big addition to differentiate it from the Punisher: AOE stagger. While the Punisher has higher damage and better single target capabilities, the new Concussive has lower damage but can hold off several enemies at once with AOE concussive rounds. This allows the Concussive to have two roles: A support role for your team that can slow the advance of groups of enemies, and a weapon that provides a safe but slow way of killing enemies when by yourself. Of course, the weapon isn't meant to hold back a bug breach or anything. The AOE is meant to be small and not be a "get out of jail free card". If your surrounded, you'll still die horribly and the AOE will cause an effect similar to the "Tremor" environmental effect when hitting yourself or allies with the concussive blast (depletion of stamina and slow effect that fades after a few seconds), but it can stagger a few of those Berserkers or Hive Commanders chasing after your friend to give them some breathing room, or hold back those two Stalkers sneaking up on your fellow Helldiver while they reload their Autocannon. It won't kill, but your fellow Helldivers will thank you when you save them from danger.
BR-14 Adjudicator
- Damage: 80 - Capacity: 25 - Recoil: 40 - Fire Rate: 550 - Medium Armor Penetrating - 7 + 1 Mags - Role: Accurate, medium armor penetrating rifle with limited effectiveness against large groupsNEW STATS
- Damage: 90 - Capacity: 25 - Recoil: 40 - Fire Rate: 480 - Light Armor Penetrating - 7 + 1 Mags - Changed to Marksman Rifle Classification - Semi-auto/3-Round Burst only - New Role: Accurate, light armor penetrating rifle that trades damage for improved effectiveness against large groupsNotes: The change to the BR-14 Adjudicator from a Marksman Rifle to a Assault Rifle never really sat well with me, especially because it ended up being everything the Penetrator was supposed to be and still wasn't great. In the real world, a battle rifle tend to sit somewhere between assault rifles and designated marksman rifles, though they usually are closer to marksman rifles. Notable examples are the FN FAL, M14, and Heckler & Koch G3. With this in mind, figuring out how to balance the rifle is a bit tricky. I wanted it to have higher single target damage then Assault Rifles to move it away from that role, while also having better crowd control then the Diligence to give it a new role the Marksman Rifle category lacks. First, we increase the damage and recoil slightly while reducing the fire rate to move it more towards being a marksman rifle. Second, we change it from medium armor penetration to light armor penetration. We don't want it to compete with the Penetrator or Counter Snipe, but instead want it to be a faster firing but lighter hitting option for the Marksman Rifle category. Finally, we remove the full auto firing option and replace it with a 3-round burst option as while there are battle rifles that do have a full auto setting in the real world, it's usually extremely impractical due to the immense recoil, though I'll admit keeping the full-auto feels like something that would be done in-universe. With these final changes, we now have true battle rifle that bridges the gap between assault rifles and marksman rifles. Want the crowd control of an assault rifle, but the high damage of a marksman rifle? This is the weapon for you.
SG-225SP Breaker Spray&Pray
- Damage: 192 (12 Damage per pellet) - Capacity: 26 - Recoil: 45 - Fire Rate: 330 - Light Armor Penetrating - 7 + 1 Magazines - 16 Pellets per shot - Role: High capacity shotgun firing birdshotNEW STATS
- Damage: 420 (12 Damage per pellet) - Capacity: 24 - Recoil: 40 - Fire Rate: 350 - Light Armor Penetrating - 6 + 1 Magazines - 35 Pellets per shot - Increased spread - Role: High capacity shotgun firing birdshot that was designed with "accuracy by volume of fire" in mindNotes: A fun little bonus addition to this list. The SG-225SP Breaker Spray&Pray is a bit notorious for being a direct downgrade from the Breaker Incendiary after it got buffed. Therefore, in the spirit of democracy and fun, I came up with these changes. In real life, bird shot is quite weak, has huge spread, and a single shell can have upwards of 70+ pellets in them to maximize the chances of hitting a bird in flight. While the idea would be really funny, having the game calculate the trajectory and impact of 70 individual projectiles from just one player would be a lot for the game to do, and each pellet would have to do around 5-6 damage each with an enormous spread to be balanced, so this is the next best thing I came up with. The new Spray&Pray is designed to litter a battlefield with a hail of pellets, encouraging the user to indiscriminately fire in whatever direction the enemy is in. It's inaccurate, will likely not land more then 6 pellets on the same target unless your up close, and will likely hit your allies if they're anywhere in the direction your firing, but that's the entire point. This is for the insane, the wacky, those who truly embody the chaotic nature of Helldivers and want a fun gun. You close your eyes, pull the trigger, and blindly fire into a bug breach knowing Lady Liberty guides your every shot.
2024.05.15 18:37 ovoxogkmc Adriana’s Gasosa
This story is based on ALLEGEDLY true events. It is inspired by a line in G-Eazy’s “Maximum”, where he claims her heard supermodel Adriana Lima fart and it was apparently so stinky he had to cover his nose and walk away. The events I describe in the story will be my own interpretation of what could’ve happened during this strange encounter between two celebs
It had been a long recording night in the studio for award winning rapper G-Eazy. The “You Don’t Own Me” musician spent much of his day working on the follow up album to his debut release which catapulted him to stardom. After sleeping overnight at Westlake Recording Studios in WeHo, G-Eazy gets a call from his agent to remind him that he’s scheduled to make a talk show appearance for NBC’s pop culture news staple “Extra”. Totally forgetting about this engagement, a restless G-Eazy pulls himself up from the couch and stumbles out the door as he heads out to the black Escalade awaiting to take him home. Once G-Eazy arrives back to his Los Angeles residence, he showers, changes clothes and takes a few calls from his team so they can go over what will be talked about during his Extra Interview
Later, G-Eazy hops back in the black Escalade which takes him to NBC studios where Extra is currently taping its latest episode. G-Eazy is met at the studio by his agent along with the rest of his team. They are all greeted by the show’s producer who takes them to the main dressing room. It is there where G-Eazy receives his hair and makeup and also gets to watch his crush Adriana Lima sit down with Extra for her own exclusive interview. G-Eazy has always been fond of the Brazilian supermodel and had no idea she was going to be a guest on the show. Not only does G-Eazy find Adriana incredibly attractive, he is aware that she is knewly single thus he immediately comes up with a plan to “shoot his shot”. The greaser-looking rapper figured rather than wait until call time to go out on set and perhaps run into Adriana after his interview, it was perhaps a better idea to leave his dressing room ahead of time and try to catch the Victoria Secret beauty on her way out. For the time being, he sat in his chair, studying Adriana’s body language, keeping his eyes glued to the movement of her mouth as she uttered soft spoken words under her thick, gorgeous accent. He stared her up and down and up and down, analyzing her every move, taking in her presence through the screen. The longer he watched, the more apparent it became, he HAD to have this woman
As the day longs, G-Eazy becomes a bit unsure of his master plan. Hair and makeup has been taking much longer than he had anticipated and Adriana’s interview was beginning to wrap up. He begins eyeing around the room, attempting to come up with a quick getaway as he fidgets in his seat. Finally, the words spill out and he tells the styling people that he has to go to the bathroom. Without even waiting for a response, G-Eazy jumps out of his chair and fast walks out of the door. Completely unsure of where Adriana would even be coming from once her interview had concluded, he runs around the lot in hopes of running into a 5’11, brown skinned model in long, white silk dress good enough to be worn at an overseas film festival. After aimlessly wandering around the lot, G-Eazy finds himself approaching the entrance to the soundstage where the interviews are conducted. He spots two of the hosts sitting as they get their makeup retouched. He then looks to his left…and there she is. Adriana is standing with a few other important looking folks, smiling and giggling in what seems to be a conversation being had between everyone. G-Eazy walks back toward the hall, only to stop halfway, he decides to stay there and “look busy” as he waits for Adriana to approach the walkway.
Sure enough, the Brazilian stunner begins making her way toward the entrance and she starts walking up the hall. She is joined by two other people, perhaps her agent and assistant. G-East looks up from his phone and commences his long awaited plan. He walks up and blocks Adriana from brushing past him. It’s then that he politely asks for a pic with the model and he is genuinely surprised when she recognizes the “No Limit” rapper and tells him how big of a fan she is. The pair go off to the side and take a few pics. Now for the good part. G-Eazy turns on the and sends a few flirtatious comments Adriana’s way to which she is obviously flattered and even blushes quite noticeably. As G-Eazy begins to put another move on the supermodel, he hears an odd sound. FFFFFRRRRR He initially suspects he just received a text as he whips out his phone yet there’s no new notifications that pop up on his screen. He looks around as he continues talking but his sentence is cut off when he gets a whiff of the foulest odor. G-Easy stops and looks up at Adriana who’s standing a mere two-three feet away from him. She looks off to the side as she plays with her hair. She says something but between her accent and the nasty stench floating in the air, G-Eazy has no comprehension of what she even uttered. The space between the two stars grows pungent, it’s as if a giant piece of dog turd fell from the sky and landed right between their feet. At that moment, all G-Eazy can say is that it was nice meeting the stunning Amazon and he awkwardly walks away, hearing Adriana’s faint “it was nice to meet you as well” only as he turns his back and covers his nose with his shirt. Somehow the stench is potent enough to start following him so he begins speed walking back to his dressing room
submitted by ovoxogkmc to celebfartfantasies [link] [comments]
It had been a long recording night in the studio for award winning rapper G-Eazy. The “You Don’t Own Me” musician spent much of his day working on the follow up album to his debut release which catapulted him to stardom. After sleeping overnight at Westlake Recording Studios in WeHo, G-Eazy gets a call from his agent to remind him that he’s scheduled to make a talk show appearance for NBC’s pop culture news staple “Extra”. Totally forgetting about this engagement, a restless G-Eazy pulls himself up from the couch and stumbles out the door as he heads out to the black Escalade awaiting to take him home. Once G-Eazy arrives back to his Los Angeles residence, he showers, changes clothes and takes a few calls from his team so they can go over what will be talked about during his Extra Interview
Later, G-Eazy hops back in the black Escalade which takes him to NBC studios where Extra is currently taping its latest episode. G-Eazy is met at the studio by his agent along with the rest of his team. They are all greeted by the show’s producer who takes them to the main dressing room. It is there where G-Eazy receives his hair and makeup and also gets to watch his crush Adriana Lima sit down with Extra for her own exclusive interview. G-Eazy has always been fond of the Brazilian supermodel and had no idea she was going to be a guest on the show. Not only does G-Eazy find Adriana incredibly attractive, he is aware that she is knewly single thus he immediately comes up with a plan to “shoot his shot”. The greaser-looking rapper figured rather than wait until call time to go out on set and perhaps run into Adriana after his interview, it was perhaps a better idea to leave his dressing room ahead of time and try to catch the Victoria Secret beauty on her way out. For the time being, he sat in his chair, studying Adriana’s body language, keeping his eyes glued to the movement of her mouth as she uttered soft spoken words under her thick, gorgeous accent. He stared her up and down and up and down, analyzing her every move, taking in her presence through the screen. The longer he watched, the more apparent it became, he HAD to have this woman
As the day longs, G-Eazy becomes a bit unsure of his master plan. Hair and makeup has been taking much longer than he had anticipated and Adriana’s interview was beginning to wrap up. He begins eyeing around the room, attempting to come up with a quick getaway as he fidgets in his seat. Finally, the words spill out and he tells the styling people that he has to go to the bathroom. Without even waiting for a response, G-Eazy jumps out of his chair and fast walks out of the door. Completely unsure of where Adriana would even be coming from once her interview had concluded, he runs around the lot in hopes of running into a 5’11, brown skinned model in long, white silk dress good enough to be worn at an overseas film festival. After aimlessly wandering around the lot, G-Eazy finds himself approaching the entrance to the soundstage where the interviews are conducted. He spots two of the hosts sitting as they get their makeup retouched. He then looks to his left…and there she is. Adriana is standing with a few other important looking folks, smiling and giggling in what seems to be a conversation being had between everyone. G-Eazy walks back toward the hall, only to stop halfway, he decides to stay there and “look busy” as he waits for Adriana to approach the walkway.
Sure enough, the Brazilian stunner begins making her way toward the entrance and she starts walking up the hall. She is joined by two other people, perhaps her agent and assistant. G-East looks up from his phone and commences his long awaited plan. He walks up and blocks Adriana from brushing past him. It’s then that he politely asks for a pic with the model and he is genuinely surprised when she recognizes the “No Limit” rapper and tells him how big of a fan she is. The pair go off to the side and take a few pics. Now for the good part. G-Eazy turns on the and sends a few flirtatious comments Adriana’s way to which she is obviously flattered and even blushes quite noticeably. As G-Eazy begins to put another move on the supermodel, he hears an odd sound. FFFFFRRRRR He initially suspects he just received a text as he whips out his phone yet there’s no new notifications that pop up on his screen. He looks around as he continues talking but his sentence is cut off when he gets a whiff of the foulest odor. G-Easy stops and looks up at Adriana who’s standing a mere two-three feet away from him. She looks off to the side as she plays with her hair. She says something but between her accent and the nasty stench floating in the air, G-Eazy has no comprehension of what she even uttered. The space between the two stars grows pungent, it’s as if a giant piece of dog turd fell from the sky and landed right between their feet. At that moment, all G-Eazy can say is that it was nice meeting the stunning Amazon and he awkwardly walks away, hearing Adriana’s faint “it was nice to meet you as well” only as he turns his back and covers his nose with his shirt. Somehow the stench is potent enough to start following him so he begins speed walking back to his dressing room
2024.05.15 18:36 RainInMyBr4in The strange disappearance of Eva Brennan
Eva Brennan was a 39 year old Irish woman who vanished after leaving her parents home in Dublin on Sunday 25th July 1993. Despite vanishing exactly 4 months after Annie McCarrick, her case received almost no police or media attention which her family feels drastically affected the investigation.
Eva was single and lived alone in a one bedroom apartment in the upmarket South Dublin suburb of Rathgar. She stood at 5'7 and wore her hair short, looking much younger than 39. According to her family and friends, she "appeared 10 years younger than her actual age". She was also described as being a "creature of habit and enjoyed a quiet life based on routine". Sunday the 25th started off normally; Eva went to mass at St Joseph's Parish Terenure and then walked to her parents home in Rathgar via Templeouge Road, arriving at approximately 1pm. Eva reportedly visited her parents almost every single day and this was no exception. This particular Sunday was a bank holiday and the entire family had come together to have dinner. However, before dinner could start, Eva and her siblings had an argument over the food being served. Although a small and seemingly insignificant argument, Eva promptly decided to leave her parents home afterwards. She was last seen leaving her parents home in Rathdown Park.
By the time Tuesday 27th came around, Eva's family was starting to get worried. They hadn't heard anything from her since Sunday which was extremely uncharacteristic of her. They would normally speak to or see her daily so they knew something was wrong. Her father, David Brennan, called round to her apartment in Maddison House but didn't get any reply. Increasingly concerned, he returned with a barman from the pub he owned and they broke a window to gain entry. Upon entering the property, he observed how clean and tidy everything was, with nothing out of place and no sign of a struggle. He also stated that the coat she had been wearing on Sunday was found in her apartment so she definitely made it home that day. However, her handbag, keys and money weren't present. The pink tracksuit that she'd been wearing on Sunday couldn't be accounted for either. Her father reported her missing later that same day.
Despite Eva's disappearance being mere months apart from Annie McCarrick's, the Garda didn't seem to take her family's report particularly seriously and simply told them that Eva was over 21 years of age and that they didn't think her disappearance was the result of foul play. Even when her family told Gardaí that Eva suffered from depression, they simply suggested that she had committed suicide and didn't look at the case further. Eva's family dispute this theory as she was a devout catholic and she left no suicide note or anything similar to suggest she had intention. Frustrated at the Garda's lack of interest in the case, David Brennan used his political influence through the FF party to enlist the help of Albert Reynolds, the Irish head of state, in getting authorities to investigate properly. Gardaí eventually began to look into the case more seriously but by this point, Eva had been missing for over a month and a forensic examination of her apartment revealed nothing. It's unknown what time Eva arrived at her apartment on the Sunday and left again but what's baffling is that there wasn't a single sighting of her by anyone on the way home. She would have walked along several very busy streets that were lined with restaurants and cafés and it was a warm summer's day. In addition, Eva's father was a successful businessman who owned several pubs and was involved politically so him and his family were very well known in that area. Despite this, not a single sighting of Eva was reported that day.
It has been almost 31 years since Eva vanished and not a single trace of her has ever been found. It's still unclear why she wasn't seen walking home, where she went after returning to her apartment and if her disappearance was the result of foul play or, as originally stated, suicide. In addition, a look into Eva's background found no boyfriends or romantic partners that could have been involved. Alan Bailey, the former sergeant detective of the Garda's cold case unit and national coordinator of Operation Trace stated "I always considered Eva to be one of the forgotten missing persons. If you ask anybody who disappeared in 1993, they'll always mention Annie, but Eva seems to have been forgotten". Garda have confirmed that Eva's case is still active today and they have issued a new public appeal for any information that could be relevant. However, unless new information comes to light, Eva remains missing with not a single trace of her since 1993.
Sources: https://www.rte.ie/news/dublin/2023/0724/1396270-missing-eva-brennan/
https://www.irelandsvanishingtriangle.com/general-5
submitted by RainInMyBr4in to UnresolvedMysteries [link] [comments]
Eva was single and lived alone in a one bedroom apartment in the upmarket South Dublin suburb of Rathgar. She stood at 5'7 and wore her hair short, looking much younger than 39. According to her family and friends, she "appeared 10 years younger than her actual age". She was also described as being a "creature of habit and enjoyed a quiet life based on routine". Sunday the 25th started off normally; Eva went to mass at St Joseph's Parish Terenure and then walked to her parents home in Rathgar via Templeouge Road, arriving at approximately 1pm. Eva reportedly visited her parents almost every single day and this was no exception. This particular Sunday was a bank holiday and the entire family had come together to have dinner. However, before dinner could start, Eva and her siblings had an argument over the food being served. Although a small and seemingly insignificant argument, Eva promptly decided to leave her parents home afterwards. She was last seen leaving her parents home in Rathdown Park.
By the time Tuesday 27th came around, Eva's family was starting to get worried. They hadn't heard anything from her since Sunday which was extremely uncharacteristic of her. They would normally speak to or see her daily so they knew something was wrong. Her father, David Brennan, called round to her apartment in Maddison House but didn't get any reply. Increasingly concerned, he returned with a barman from the pub he owned and they broke a window to gain entry. Upon entering the property, he observed how clean and tidy everything was, with nothing out of place and no sign of a struggle. He also stated that the coat she had been wearing on Sunday was found in her apartment so she definitely made it home that day. However, her handbag, keys and money weren't present. The pink tracksuit that she'd been wearing on Sunday couldn't be accounted for either. Her father reported her missing later that same day.
Despite Eva's disappearance being mere months apart from Annie McCarrick's, the Garda didn't seem to take her family's report particularly seriously and simply told them that Eva was over 21 years of age and that they didn't think her disappearance was the result of foul play. Even when her family told Gardaí that Eva suffered from depression, they simply suggested that she had committed suicide and didn't look at the case further. Eva's family dispute this theory as she was a devout catholic and she left no suicide note or anything similar to suggest she had intention. Frustrated at the Garda's lack of interest in the case, David Brennan used his political influence through the FF party to enlist the help of Albert Reynolds, the Irish head of state, in getting authorities to investigate properly. Gardaí eventually began to look into the case more seriously but by this point, Eva had been missing for over a month and a forensic examination of her apartment revealed nothing. It's unknown what time Eva arrived at her apartment on the Sunday and left again but what's baffling is that there wasn't a single sighting of her by anyone on the way home. She would have walked along several very busy streets that were lined with restaurants and cafés and it was a warm summer's day. In addition, Eva's father was a successful businessman who owned several pubs and was involved politically so him and his family were very well known in that area. Despite this, not a single sighting of Eva was reported that day.
It has been almost 31 years since Eva vanished and not a single trace of her has ever been found. It's still unclear why she wasn't seen walking home, where she went after returning to her apartment and if her disappearance was the result of foul play or, as originally stated, suicide. In addition, a look into Eva's background found no boyfriends or romantic partners that could have been involved. Alan Bailey, the former sergeant detective of the Garda's cold case unit and national coordinator of Operation Trace stated "I always considered Eva to be one of the forgotten missing persons. If you ask anybody who disappeared in 1993, they'll always mention Annie, but Eva seems to have been forgotten". Garda have confirmed that Eva's case is still active today and they have issued a new public appeal for any information that could be relevant. However, unless new information comes to light, Eva remains missing with not a single trace of her since 1993.
Sources: https://www.rte.ie/news/dublin/2023/0724/1396270-missing-eva-brennan/
https://www.irelandsvanishingtriangle.com/general-5
2024.05.15 18:36 minus9000degrees My boyfriend (21M) might be homeless soon and I (20F) don't know how to support him?
I 20F, and my bf 21 M, have been together for 3 months. I'm very happy in our relationship, he is the sweetest and most awesome person on this planet, but his financial situation worries me immensely. We've met through our uni.
I would like to point out that I am not looking for financial advice, but rather how I should act from now.
He's not happy with the course he chose, so he hasn't been attending classes for several months. The university isn't public, so we pay a monthly fee which isn't cheap. Since last month, he couldn't pay his rent (he doesn't get any financial aids and doesn't work) and I've been fine with buying groceries for the two of us which I didn't mind. He's at my place most of the time but also still sleeps and eats at his place or a friend's sometimes. He keeps talking about how he can't afford his rent and that he needs to find work, but after 1 1/2 months he hasn't even started looking.
After two months, the landlord is able to kick out the renter without further notice.
He could still get out of the contract with the university and get back the money that he has paid the last 6 months. This would at least cover a fraction of the debt. But he doesn't talk to the uni's office and the deadline is this week. It is starting to grow on me. I really don't mind him being at my place, I also don't mind paying for food because I'm good at handling money. I don't have a lot but I get around. It wouldn't be so bad if I knew that he was at least trying to find a solution to make money. I can't (and won't) support him financially because I don't have that kind of money, (he also doesn't ask me to). It is also out of question that he moves in with me (he hasn't initiated moving into the place where I live now, I'm just thinking forward. If he doesn't have a place to stay it is logical that he would stay at my place). I don't live alone, and it would be a financial burden for my roommate and me to cover another person.
I also wouldn't say that he is trying to depend on me - I happily cook for him and if he got some money from his friends, he buys groceries too and cooks for me. He loves to make gifts and buy me flowers whenever he can. I know he would pay for more if he could, it's just the lack of trying that is growing on me. I don't know how to motivate him to look for work. I'm not his mom and not responsible for his financial decisions.
TLDR; bf doesn't look for work and I cannot support him financially forever.
submitted by minus9000degrees to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
I would like to point out that I am not looking for financial advice, but rather how I should act from now.
He's not happy with the course he chose, so he hasn't been attending classes for several months. The university isn't public, so we pay a monthly fee which isn't cheap. Since last month, he couldn't pay his rent (he doesn't get any financial aids and doesn't work) and I've been fine with buying groceries for the two of us which I didn't mind. He's at my place most of the time but also still sleeps and eats at his place or a friend's sometimes. He keeps talking about how he can't afford his rent and that he needs to find work, but after 1 1/2 months he hasn't even started looking.
After two months, the landlord is able to kick out the renter without further notice.
He could still get out of the contract with the university and get back the money that he has paid the last 6 months. This would at least cover a fraction of the debt. But he doesn't talk to the uni's office and the deadline is this week. It is starting to grow on me. I really don't mind him being at my place, I also don't mind paying for food because I'm good at handling money. I don't have a lot but I get around. It wouldn't be so bad if I knew that he was at least trying to find a solution to make money. I can't (and won't) support him financially because I don't have that kind of money, (he also doesn't ask me to). It is also out of question that he moves in with me (he hasn't initiated moving into the place where I live now, I'm just thinking forward. If he doesn't have a place to stay it is logical that he would stay at my place). I don't live alone, and it would be a financial burden for my roommate and me to cover another person.
I also wouldn't say that he is trying to depend on me - I happily cook for him and if he got some money from his friends, he buys groceries too and cooks for me. He loves to make gifts and buy me flowers whenever he can. I know he would pay for more if he could, it's just the lack of trying that is growing on me. I don't know how to motivate him to look for work. I'm not his mom and not responsible for his financial decisions.
TLDR; bf doesn't look for work and I cannot support him financially forever.
2024.05.15 18:35 KT111717 She crossed the Rainbow Bridge at nearly 20 years old. This is her story- 💙
 | Hi everyone! First post to the community- I’m happy to say that I finally got the courage to join. This post took almost 2 months to muster up as I couldn’t even stand writing about this- but here I go. submitted by KT111717 to seniordogs [link] [comments] I lost my Aussie that I grew up with for almost 20 years in August of 22’ and it feels like I will never get over the loss of her. She was my absolute best friend in the whole world. Now- many people say their dog is their best friend. But, let me give you some context… I was an only child, and my first memory was my mom taking me to a ranch to pick out my very first puppy. Out of the 25 puppies that flocked out of the barn doors, only one ran up to my feet with a small tennis ball in tow. I knew she was the one for me then and there- She chose me, so I chose her. She tolerated my youth ear and nub pulling phase, my games of Hannah Montana dress up, solo concerts, throwing myself from the highest bunk bed and playing lassie, playing vet, and eventual subsequent makeshift agility courses that I set up with bar stools and pop-up tunnels when I turned 10-11. Never once did she shy away from this, almost participating with joy in every moment we spent together. I was an only child so you can imagine how lonely I was, (Many people don’t have this experience as an only child, but it was mine-) Growing up with a single mom that had an addiction- most of the time it was just me and my dog, and we had to fend for ourselves most nights. She was there for me after I was SAed when I was 7- unable to communicate what had happened to anyone but her in fear of embarrassment or shame, but I could talk to her- she’d listen to me with nothing but sympathy in those big blue eyes of hers. She was with me when we lost our apartment, moving back in with my grandmother who blatantly hated me because I wasn’t fully white like her other grandchildren. She was with me when I contemplated calling the cops on my mother when she was passed out on the floor of the bathroom and I couldn’t wake her up and I thought she was dead. She was there for me when I was bullied in school for being overweight, unable to eat most healthy things because I was making my own meals most nights. She was there when I got into my preferred high school program that was over an hour away from home, waking me up with a wagging tail despite knowing I’d have to leave at 4am to catch a bus and wouldn’t return until later that night. She was there when I got together with my now fiancé, accepting him into the family as long as he tossed the ball for her a few times- as a lover of football, it was easy to get him to play with her for hours, which she adored. She was there for me when my fiancé and I moved into a small shed away from home, no a/c, no bathroom, no running water, she tagged along happily in the tight living quarters. She comforted me when I found out my grandfather had dementia and he was declining quickly, she whimpered when I cried that we’d have to return to my abusive grandmothers house to take care of him- knowing I’m subjecting myself to a world of pain to care for the one person who was always kind to me. She mediated my fights with my mother, as we ended up arguing most nights about her addiction and how it has affected me in my life. Despite how many hardships I went through, and how many times I couldn’t find the courage to get out of bed in the morning- she always kept me going. Knowing that someone had stuck by me through my whole life and didn’t even have a thought of leaving my side, made me feel wanted in life. Not long after I turned 18 years old, she became unable to control her bladder. Many suggested I put her down due to it being an ‘inconvenience’ but I refused- she had so much left to give, and I didn’t mind cleaning up after her mess despite how the tile ended up stained and how much we spent on diapers she’d only kick off moments after putting them on. No one knew how little I cared to be covered in pet urine as long as I got to embrace my dog that cared for me for so long. When I turned 19, she couldn’t hold her poop anymore, doing her business anywhere and everywhere. I didn’t care, I cleaned it up. She was still my best friend, she took care of me- so I’ll take care of her. She then lost her ability to hear me, so I spoke louder. What’s wrong with screaming ‘I love you’ to a dog that got so excited whenever you said it? If anything it helped me express myself louder than usual, as I am a quiet person. A few months later, she couldn’t play ball as much as she wanted to, getting winded by her arthritis and aging lungs. Then on my 21st birthday, she lost the ability to use her hind legs. I didn’t care, I started looking up dog wheelchairs- because why not? She was still a puppy in my eyes, she had so much time left despite nearing 20 years old. My fiancé warned me that the time may be near, but I ignored him. She’d never die. She couldn’t. She’d live forever. I flipped her position few times a day, fed and watered her, gave her tons of treats, Carried her inside and outside to enjoy the sun. Anything I could do that I knew would lift her spirits. But 2 weeks after my 21st birthday, I woke up to her whining. Not unusual, since she couldn’t sleep in bed with us anymore and had to sleep at the foot of our bed on a large pillow, but this time I heard a thud. Creeping to the edge of the bed I was met with the most horrifying sight- she was seizing. I jumped off the bed, cradling her as I tried to keep her from throwing herself off of her pillow and hitting her head. My fiancé watched in silence, but he didn’t dare suggest she was getting close to passing, as it had caused fights between us before. I REFUSED to believe my best friend was dying, it had to be a one time thing… Right? We got maybe a few hour break before it happened again, then again… I had to make the call. She hated the vet, I couldn’t bring her there. I scoured the internet for hours, trying to find a Vet that does home visits. I made an appointment for the morning. Despite the lady driving out and taking one look at my beautiful Aussie and sighing, I immediately asked her if she can pull through this, If there was an alternative, ANYTHING to keep her from leaving my side. My fiancé put his hand on my shoulder, offering what little comfort he thought I could get from what the Vet said next. There was no hope. No enticing her to eat with pieces of sliced cheese, no magical medication to cure her, no quality of life that I could give to a dog so determined to keep living. I didn’t cry, I still held hope, even when the Vet injected her with medication to make her sleep before the final injection. I felt her relax into my arms, so I thought just maybe that would help her sleep it off. But once the lady held up the syringe with the bright pink liquid, I couldn’t stop staring at it. She asked me only once if I was ready, and I said yes immediately- blind to the thought that this would be the last time I would get to hold her warmth. She proceeded slowly, and in the moment I felt no fear- as I thought “She’s too strong for this shot, she’ll pop back up in no time afterwards with a new vigor for life! I’ll prove them all wrong!”… I didn’t know what was to come. Her chest stopped rising, and her nose began to grow cold. I don’t know how many hours I sat by her body waiting for her to wake up. I don’t remember my fiancé leaving the room to pay her for her kind service, I don’t remember him suggesting we bury her before she grew stiff, I don’t remember anything other than her blank stare that never left the vacant space of the wall. It took until later that night for us to start digging, and once we were done, I kept glancing at her body in hopes that she may have changed her mind, that she’d come back to me. It was just a cruel game. Laying her down in her final resting place, i scowled at the flies that soon began to circle around us. How could they disturb us?! She clearly wasn’t dead…. Just, recovering. But after my fiancé filled the grave, and I dug a tiny hole for her to breath through if she decided to come back. It finally hit me. She was gone. For the first time in my life I was truly alone. I cradled her harness, her tennis ball, my childhood picture of me holding her up to the camera in my stubby arms- and I waited by her grave. I couldn’t leave. I truly don’t remember much afterwards, other than the empty sorrow that built in my chest- since it never left. I could never love again. Not another person, not another dog. My fiancé saw the change in me, I never left the bed, I didn’t shower, I didn’t eat. I lost 60 pounds. I didn’t care, I just wanted my best friend. Fast forward to March of 23’ when I found out I was pregnant. First there was an insurmountable joy that I’d now have purpose in life, but then the same ache hit in my chest that I felt the day my best friend died. My sweet Aussie would never get to see me become a mother, she’d never get to see me be married, she’d never get to raise my child as she raised me. The things I always thought she’d be there for, she would never get to see. I’m 5 months into being a mother now, and still grieving. We’ve thought of getting another dog, but I couldn’t stand even looking at another puppy. I didn’t have the capacity in my heart to go through this again. But will I neglect my own child of feeling this kind of bond with a pet? Of love that is unmatched by a dog companion? Will I continue to neglect my fiancés love for animals due to my fear of my Aussie looking down from wherever she is and feeling betrayed that I replaced her? I’m rambling at this point, but god it’s been so hard. I miss her so much. She was my everything. Even now I struggle with the thought that I could love my baby just as much as I loved my dear Aussie. Is that even normal? It’s been almost 2 years, and I still feel empty. Despite this post being very self-loathing, I just wanted to get my feelings out and find some peace that anyone else has felt this way. Is it just me? Will this ever go away? Senior dog owners, will this pain ever pass? 🥲 Sincerely, A girl who misses her best friend. I love you P. 💔 |
2024.05.15 18:35 joshuadwx Introducing Soundcore P30i
 | Soundcore has just released a new set of true wireless earbuds... Take a look at P30i! submitted by joshuadwx to anker [link] [comments] Source: Soundcore/Amazon Features & details
Pricing and Availability: Soundcore's P30i is available to order now from Amazon for $49.99 and should begin shipping immediately. AnkerInsider Affiliate Links Non-Affiliate Links Are you ordering soundcore's new set of true wireless earbuds? Let us know with a comment! Note: A30i is coming soon: https://preview.redd.it/u286ws2tam0d1.png?width=1500&format=png&auto=webp&s=c32e201eeba78b2498a782a0414b89af2e643ea7 |
2024.05.15 18:34 Power_Stone A bit of a “success” story(?)
This might be a bit of a departure from the normal posts here but I think some people may find it to be a bit of a welcome change. I'll do my best to keep this concise but we will see what happens.
For the back story: I am someone with ADHD and self-diagnosed myself with autism after multiple years of looking at symptoms and reflecting on experiences in my life. School was relatively easy for me ( queue gifted and burnt out child clause ) to the point where I was doing most assignments 10 to 15 min before the class started and was still getting A's. I did do a sport during school ( I raced motocross ) and for the most part I believe that kept me balanced and sociable for the most part.
Which brings me to the start of my journey through mental health and the struggles I have dealt with the past few years. After High school obviously things changed drastically. First thing is after high school I was somewhat faced with the choice of either immediately going to work and possibly pursuing a career racing motocross at the professional level or going to college. I ended up choosing the latter due to the thought of doing something I did for fun as a job would ruin it. I still stand by this choice to this day. But once moving to college and stopping motocross ( due to time, money, and risk of injury ) I was faced with a lot of issues. I didn't know how to study, constantly struggling and not knowing why and just feeling like I lost my place in the world, losing my "identity" in a sense. My life in a sense felt like it was falling apart. Around this time I did find a partner which did help to some extent.
Fast forward about 2 years and I graduated community college with my AA and my AS and transferred to a public university. And to my surprise things went completely off the rails here. I fell into depression, my class work was abysmal, truly felt like everything was falling apart. It was after I decided to drop out of college and get diagnosed with ADHD did things finally make a turn. After many years of therapy, psychiatry, and just doing things to work on myself personally otherwise have things finally started to feel in a sense "good" again. I finally found a medicine regimen with my Psychiatrist that is working great for me and I have identified things that help me feel better every day, and realistically most of them are small things.
I guess my point here is, for those of us that are struggling keep at it. Nothing is the same for everyone but small changes here and there can't make a lifetime of difference. You can do it, sometimes it just takes that much time.
submitted by Power_Stone to Healthygamergg [link] [comments]
For the back story: I am someone with ADHD and self-diagnosed myself with autism after multiple years of looking at symptoms and reflecting on experiences in my life. School was relatively easy for me ( queue gifted and burnt out child clause ) to the point where I was doing most assignments 10 to 15 min before the class started and was still getting A's. I did do a sport during school ( I raced motocross ) and for the most part I believe that kept me balanced and sociable for the most part.
Which brings me to the start of my journey through mental health and the struggles I have dealt with the past few years. After High school obviously things changed drastically. First thing is after high school I was somewhat faced with the choice of either immediately going to work and possibly pursuing a career racing motocross at the professional level or going to college. I ended up choosing the latter due to the thought of doing something I did for fun as a job would ruin it. I still stand by this choice to this day. But once moving to college and stopping motocross ( due to time, money, and risk of injury ) I was faced with a lot of issues. I didn't know how to study, constantly struggling and not knowing why and just feeling like I lost my place in the world, losing my "identity" in a sense. My life in a sense felt like it was falling apart. Around this time I did find a partner which did help to some extent.
Fast forward about 2 years and I graduated community college with my AA and my AS and transferred to a public university. And to my surprise things went completely off the rails here. I fell into depression, my class work was abysmal, truly felt like everything was falling apart. It was after I decided to drop out of college and get diagnosed with ADHD did things finally make a turn. After many years of therapy, psychiatry, and just doing things to work on myself personally otherwise have things finally started to feel in a sense "good" again. I finally found a medicine regimen with my Psychiatrist that is working great for me and I have identified things that help me feel better every day, and realistically most of them are small things.
- Regularly showering
- Brushing teeth/hair
- Exercise
- New friends
- Getting out of my comfort zone
- Keeping my living space tidy
- Learning something new ( I chose guitar )
- Cooking my own proper meals
- Finding myself
I guess my point here is, for those of us that are struggling keep at it. Nothing is the same for everyone but small changes here and there can't make a lifetime of difference. You can do it, sometimes it just takes that much time.
2024.05.15 18:34 BornLuckiest Are you wearing your Tinfoil Tuxedo and Top Hat? Renaissance Tech acquires $12.5mn shares in Gamestop, and Jim Simons dies! 👀
So, you probably wont have heard of Renaissance Technologies (aka RenTec), perhaps one of the original Quantative HFT Hedge Funds, established in 1982.
Well, they invested $12.5mn in Gamestop, but it doesn't stop there.
Their signature Medallion fund is famed for the best record in investing history.
Sources:
Cover Page 13F-HR for Renaissance Technologies
Breakdown of Holdings for Jan to Mar 24 (Cover Page above) 👈Search this link for Gamestop, and you'll find 1,004,958 shares in sole ownership (that's not b*eneficial *ownership, for those paying attention) and they have full voting rights, meaning they are not lent out for shorting.
You'll notice this is a "NEW" investment, and it's not present in the previous filing, despite them having many investments in other gaming companies (as they obviously see Gaming as a huge growth area.)
Gamestop (GME) 1,004,958 Class A Shares worth $12,582,000
Previous Source: Breakdown of Holdings for Oct to Dec 23 👈 no matter how much you search you wont find Gamestop in here.
First, let me tell you why this huge; Dr Jim Simons isn't just the founder of some random High Frequency Trading (HFT) Investment fund. He's like the inventor of it all, if you'd like to learn more then read "The Quants: How a new Breed of Math Wizzes Conquered Wall Street and Nearly Destroyed It" (Try and find it in an old book shop rather than using Amazon though - be smart - know your enemy!)
Anyhow this legend has more weight and is arguably more respected in finance circles than Michael Büŗry, (that's the guy from the Movie "The Big Short") and we all know Bürŗy bought into Gamestop in 2019, BEFORE Ryan Cohen - he's well regarded around these parts. The buzz about Michael Bürŗy buying into GME had Roaring Kitty (aka DFV) and Ryan Cohen so excited, that they both increased their positions considerably.
This guy, is the godfather of wall-street, he began the most successful investment fund EVER (Medallion) and the company that runs the Medallion fund, invests a huge amount ($12,582,000) into Gamestop, and on the SAME DAY it's announced, Roaring Kitty comes back to life?! (...this ain't no Cohensidence!)
Jim Simons
Assuming Roaring Kitty's had a silence agreement in place for 3-years, then if we look at the detail, that silence order should/would have ended weeks ago. So, if you believe he was silenced (and if you have been following his Twitter, then that seems to be apparent) then he chose his moment! You can see how Roaring Kitty has been preparing for the last 3-years, and it's obvious that he timed his play.
These 13F-HR filings are required every 3-months. The deadline to file after each quarter is around 6-weeks after (42 days later than the reporting period end) to give them time to prepare the filings, etc.
Generally, it only take a week or two to prepare these things, big companies have people dedicated to the role, and often these filings are given to dedicated clerks whose job it is to to cross the Ts and dot the Is of a semi-automated report before filing to the SEC. So within certain circles many people, are aware of the content.
Once filed it takes a day or so to process, and you know there's a lot of revolving doors on Wall-street, so information travels fast, as that's the main currency of the economy.
So this position, would have been made public to those in the know, you get me? That's not so wild, perhaps one would say, "fair speculation", right?
72 hours before this is made really "public" knowledge to the rest of the world, (when millions of ape eyes are all over Jim Simons, asking him questions) he dies. The guy that no-one can out-think, the guy that dabbles in multi-dimensional topography for fun. Someone that could be a real threat to the AI trading algorithms that are currently manipulating the market and taking away price discovery. He's dead after announcing his company invested in GME.
This is really sad news.
Now, yes, he's was old, 86, that's a good innings. Especially for poor people like us, but when your one of the richest and most powerful men in the world, that's actually is not that amazing! Just look at Charlie Monger (100yrs), Warren Buffet (93yrs), George Soros (93yrs), Rupert Murdoch (93yrs), Henry Kissinger (101yrs), Queen Elizabeth (96yrs), etc. I don't need to bolster that argument; it's pretty much a fact money gives you good living, good food and good healthcare.
Here his Jim giving an interview, just over a year ago: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUTaQvnwLzM
It's worth a watch, really nice agreeable guy, a bit of a rebel, and he's got life in him, he liked breaking things, but he doesn't look like he's on death's door to me, but make your own mind up.
No statement has been made by the family about how he died, but every good tinfoil wearing ape knows, if they want to "Clinton" you, they have ways.
I do agree that this last bit, is pretty wild and speculatory, but it's not hard to imagine that people with almost unlimited money and power can get rid of people who are going to be a spanner in the works of their plan, right?
So, you know where I am going with the final stack of speculatory tinfoil theory; What actually happened to Jim Simons?
Jim Simons (1938–2024)
Rest In Peace Jim, but after all that has been said, he left us legacy;
submitted by BornLuckiest to GME [link] [comments]
Well, they invested $12.5mn in Gamestop, but it doesn't stop there.
Their signature Medallion fund is famed for the best record in investing history.
Sources:
Cover Page 13F-HR for Renaissance Technologies
Breakdown of Holdings for Jan to Mar 24 (Cover Page above) 👈Search this link for Gamestop, and you'll find 1,004,958 shares in sole ownership (that's not b*eneficial *ownership, for those paying attention) and they have full voting rights, meaning they are not lent out for shorting.
You'll notice this is a "NEW" investment, and it's not present in the previous filing, despite them having many investments in other gaming companies (as they obviously see Gaming as a huge growth area.)
Gamestop (GME) 1,004,958 Class A Shares worth $12,582,000
Previous Source: Breakdown of Holdings for Oct to Dec 23 👈 no matter how much you search you wont find Gamestop in here.
THIS IS HUGE!
I could stop this post right here, because this alone is enough for a huge discussion and debate, but there's been something niggling my Spidey-senses, but we'll come to that in a bit.First, let me tell you why this huge; Dr Jim Simons isn't just the founder of some random High Frequency Trading (HFT) Investment fund. He's like the inventor of it all, if you'd like to learn more then read "The Quants: How a new Breed of Math Wizzes Conquered Wall Street and Nearly Destroyed It" (Try and find it in an old book shop rather than using Amazon though - be smart - know your enemy!)
Anyhow this legend has more weight and is arguably more respected in finance circles than Michael Büŗry, (that's the guy from the Movie "The Big Short") and we all know Bürŗy bought into Gamestop in 2019, BEFORE Ryan Cohen - he's well regarded around these parts. The buzz about Michael Bürŗy buying into GME had Roaring Kitty (aka DFV) and Ryan Cohen so excited, that they both increased their positions considerably.
This guy, is the godfather of wall-street, he began the most successful investment fund EVER (Medallion) and the company that runs the Medallion fund, invests a huge amount ($12,582,000) into Gamestop, and on the SAME DAY it's announced, Roaring Kitty comes back to life?! (...this ain't no Cohensidence!)
Jim Simons
Assuming Roaring Kitty's had a silence agreement in place for 3-years, then if we look at the detail, that silence order should/would have ended weeks ago. So, if you believe he was silenced (and if you have been following his Twitter, then that seems to be apparent) then he chose his moment! You can see how Roaring Kitty has been preparing for the last 3-years, and it's obvious that he timed his play.
DO YOU SEE HOW HUGE THIS IS?
So, don't get distracted, 'member this; RenTec are long Gamestop, this was announed the SAME DAY that ROARING KITTY returned - and from what I can see, RenTec have not lent out the shares, they have SOLE voting authority and SOLE investment discretion.THE COLOMBO QUESTION: "EXCUSE ME DEAR APE... JUST BEFORE YOU GO"
So, firstly, have you got your tinfoil ready to wrap around your head? ...because I know you all love this wild-speculation, it's like a cherry on top of a really amazing piece of news!These 13F-HR filings are required every 3-months. The deadline to file after each quarter is around 6-weeks after (42 days later than the reporting period end) to give them time to prepare the filings, etc.
Generally, it only take a week or two to prepare these things, big companies have people dedicated to the role, and often these filings are given to dedicated clerks whose job it is to to cross the Ts and dot the Is of a semi-automated report before filing to the SEC. So within certain circles many people, are aware of the content.
Once filed it takes a day or so to process, and you know there's a lot of revolving doors on Wall-street, so information travels fast, as that's the main currency of the economy.
So this position, would have been made public to those in the know, you get me? That's not so wild, perhaps one would say, "fair speculation", right?
72 hours before this is made really "public" knowledge to the rest of the world, (when millions of ape eyes are all over Jim Simons, asking him questions) he dies. The guy that no-one can out-think, the guy that dabbles in multi-dimensional topography for fun. Someone that could be a real threat to the AI trading algorithms that are currently manipulating the market and taking away price discovery. He's dead after announcing his company invested in GME.
This is really sad news.
Now, yes, he's was old, 86, that's a good innings. Especially for poor people like us, but when your one of the richest and most powerful men in the world, that's actually is not that amazing! Just look at Charlie Monger (100yrs), Warren Buffet (93yrs), George Soros (93yrs), Rupert Murdoch (93yrs), Henry Kissinger (101yrs), Queen Elizabeth (96yrs), etc. I don't need to bolster that argument; it's pretty much a fact money gives you good living, good food and good healthcare.
Here his Jim giving an interview, just over a year ago: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUTaQvnwLzM
It's worth a watch, really nice agreeable guy, a bit of a rebel, and he's got life in him, he liked breaking things, but he doesn't look like he's on death's door to me, but make your own mind up.
No statement has been made by the family about how he died, but every good tinfoil wearing ape knows, if they want to "Clinton" you, they have ways.
I do agree that this last bit, is pretty wild and speculatory, but it's not hard to imagine that people with almost unlimited money and power can get rid of people who are going to be a spanner in the works of their plan, right?
So, you know where I am going with the final stack of speculatory tinfoil theory; What actually happened to Jim Simons?
Jim Simons (1938–2024)
Rest In Peace Jim, but after all that has been said, he left us legacy;
RENTEC are bullish on GME! 🦍🚀🌕
Edit: Typos and Grammar, and some minor word additions to make it read better - same as always.2024.05.15 18:34 whites_2003 iPad Enrollment
Hi all,
Looking for some advice on the above.
We have just setup Apple Business Manager and linked it to Intune.
This means our domain cannot be used to create Apple IDs unless managed.
We are rolling out around 20 iPads into our environment and want to install just 1 paid app and a few free ones on to each one.
Once it’s enrolled into Apple Business Manager as a device, how should we manage the Managed IDs? Each device does not have an email address and we do not want to have to create a 365 email address at a cost for each one as they do not need email. Can we use 1 Managed ID for several devices or do we need a managed ID for each iPad and therefore 20 email addresses to back it up?
I don’t think Shared iPad setup really ticks the box as each iPad will only need 1 login. We also haven’t federated the accounts as absorbing all existing account with our domain is going to need some planning.
Appreciate your help.
submitted by whites_2003 to Intune [link] [comments]
Looking for some advice on the above.
We have just setup Apple Business Manager and linked it to Intune.
This means our domain cannot be used to create Apple IDs unless managed.
We are rolling out around 20 iPads into our environment and want to install just 1 paid app and a few free ones on to each one.
Once it’s enrolled into Apple Business Manager as a device, how should we manage the Managed IDs? Each device does not have an email address and we do not want to have to create a 365 email address at a cost for each one as they do not need email. Can we use 1 Managed ID for several devices or do we need a managed ID for each iPad and therefore 20 email addresses to back it up?
I don’t think Shared iPad setup really ticks the box as each iPad will only need 1 login. We also haven’t federated the accounts as absorbing all existing account with our domain is going to need some planning.
Appreciate your help.
2024.05.15 18:34 Tobar26th Looking for help understanding tax on larger than average month
Hey I’m looking for a bit of advice on PAYE tax. I’ve recently taken a new contract at £40K.
The contract was backdated a bit for various reasons and I’ve received a few months back pay this month resulting in a back pay of £4k on top of my normal monthly salary of £3.3k.
The tax and NI have obviously hit me a lot, as has student loan deductions.
I’m comfortable with the student loan situation and know how to handle that if I decide to in due course but where do I sit with tax and NI? I assume I’ve had it taken higher than it should be due to how the back pay essentially makes it look like I’m on around £85k a year.
I’ve tried reading around it but got confused so please if you can, dumb it down for me 😅
submitted by Tobar26th to UKPersonalFinance [link] [comments]
The contract was backdated a bit for various reasons and I’ve received a few months back pay this month resulting in a back pay of £4k on top of my normal monthly salary of £3.3k.
The tax and NI have obviously hit me a lot, as has student loan deductions.
I’m comfortable with the student loan situation and know how to handle that if I decide to in due course but where do I sit with tax and NI? I assume I’ve had it taken higher than it should be due to how the back pay essentially makes it look like I’m on around £85k a year.
I’ve tried reading around it but got confused so please if you can, dumb it down for me 😅
2024.05.15 18:34 Correct-Push-7759 The only thing keeping her somewhat barely (actually not even sure if she is) afloat in the influencer realm is her expired fame from when she was actually relevant as a teen
As do probably most of y'all here, I've been aware of Acacia's presence since she first blew up on Tumblr and then gained both Instagram and Youtube (kind of) notoriety. Like any impressionable 13-14 year old, I was obsessed with her and she was probably my first "influencer" experience. That quickly wore off when I got older and reality set in.
Now looking at her and her "platforms", and seeing all the posts in here just dissecting how awful of engagement she has on all her socials, I truly believe that if she was never famous in her younger years, she wouldn't even break it as an influencer today.
The only little bit of relevancy she holds nowadays are with people like us who used to be fans (or those who have been haters from Day 1 bc of the atrocious things she's done with little to no accountability) but now pretty much pitifully check in on her every so often to reminisce on the olden days only to be hit with the reality that she is just an awful person.
She has no appeal to a female audience for reasons I don't think I need to get into because we all already know why, and quite frankly I don't see her being quite appealing to the male audience either especially with the over saturation in influencers/those who specifically cater to each audience (other than her SW on OF).
I genuinely, so whole heartedly, feel for her children and I know they're brought up all the time in here but rightfully so because NO ONE deserves to be so selfishly brought into this world as an accessory only to be discarded as fast as they became irrelevant to their mother's (and/or father's) agenda.
Acockia, if you're seeing this, please try living in the real world off of social media. You've run your course on the internet and your extensive digital footprint (body print at this point) shows for that. I think an unplugged or just PRIVATE life might do you wonders. Maybe it'll be your redemption arc for those in your personal life and teach you how to assimilate back into reality.
submitted by Correct-Push-7759 to AcaciaKerseySnark [link] [comments]
Now looking at her and her "platforms", and seeing all the posts in here just dissecting how awful of engagement she has on all her socials, I truly believe that if she was never famous in her younger years, she wouldn't even break it as an influencer today.
The only little bit of relevancy she holds nowadays are with people like us who used to be fans (or those who have been haters from Day 1 bc of the atrocious things she's done with little to no accountability) but now pretty much pitifully check in on her every so often to reminisce on the olden days only to be hit with the reality that she is just an awful person.
She has no appeal to a female audience for reasons I don't think I need to get into because we all already know why, and quite frankly I don't see her being quite appealing to the male audience either especially with the over saturation in influencers/those who specifically cater to each audience (other than her SW on OF).
I genuinely, so whole heartedly, feel for her children and I know they're brought up all the time in here but rightfully so because NO ONE deserves to be so selfishly brought into this world as an accessory only to be discarded as fast as they became irrelevant to their mother's (and/or father's) agenda.
Acockia, if you're seeing this, please try living in the real world off of social media. You've run your course on the internet and your extensive digital footprint (body print at this point) shows for that. I think an unplugged or just PRIVATE life might do you wonders. Maybe it'll be your redemption arc for those in your personal life and teach you how to assimilate back into reality.
2024.05.15 18:32 Commercial-Sign-5003 How Berlin's hiring process became the marathon you never signed up for?
The hiring process often feels like it's stretching into eternity, doesn't it? It's as if the hiring managers are searching for the divine! But come on, let's be real here. Once they bring you on board, it's not like you're summoning miracles every day, right? You're just trying to find your groove and get stuff done.
And let's talk about the exit door for a moment. Anyone can walk through it at any time. Plus, after six months, the employer can wave goodbye if they think you're not vibing with the team. It's a two-way street, folks.
Now, about those salaries. Berlin, sweetheart, your paychecks are looking a little slim compared to your cousins in other German cities and around the globe. What's up with that?
So, let's circle back: why does the hiring process drag on for months, leaving us feeling like crispy bacon in a skillet? And why do we have to endure the agony of multiple rounds of interviews, each one feeling like a marathon? Can't we just speed things up a bit and get to the good stuff?
There we are, in this circus of a hiring process, trying to keep our heads above water while navigating the treacherous waters of rent payments and grocery bills. It's like we're tightrope walkers without a safety net, balancing our responsibilities with the uncertainty of when that next paycheck will finally hit our bank accounts.
submitted by Commercial-Sign-5003 to berlin [link] [comments]
And let's talk about the exit door for a moment. Anyone can walk through it at any time. Plus, after six months, the employer can wave goodbye if they think you're not vibing with the team. It's a two-way street, folks.
Now, about those salaries. Berlin, sweetheart, your paychecks are looking a little slim compared to your cousins in other German cities and around the globe. What's up with that?
So, let's circle back: why does the hiring process drag on for months, leaving us feeling like crispy bacon in a skillet? And why do we have to endure the agony of multiple rounds of interviews, each one feeling like a marathon? Can't we just speed things up a bit and get to the good stuff?
There we are, in this circus of a hiring process, trying to keep our heads above water while navigating the treacherous waters of rent payments and grocery bills. It's like we're tightrope walkers without a safety net, balancing our responsibilities with the uncertainty of when that next paycheck will finally hit our bank accounts.
2024.05.15 18:32 canuckguy666 A DayZ Story (long)
 | Dayz Story I’ve been playing Dayz on console for about 3 months now. I played pubg since the day it came out on PC and Inwas immediately addicted to it. I loved the idea of searching for items and upgrading my guy for the fight that was to come and always landed on the outskirts of the map as far away from the action as I could. I hated dying immediately and having to wait to reload again. It was a pain the ass. If I wanted to die over and over again, I’d play COD. But this game was different. For 7 plus years, it’s the only game I played other than dying light which was awesome as well but that was temporary. I always came back to Pubg. The thrill of hunting others in a giant map and getting to the end of the circle and winning a chicken dinner made my heart pump like nothing else. The adrenaline dump was unreal. I never felt anything like it playing video games. About 3 months ago I was watching YouTube and saw a random video of some guy killing players and eating them. I was shocked… Mostly because I felt like I was living under a rock for so long that I never heard of this game before. I start watching more videos and I decide to give it a shot and download it. The first death came at the hands of a survivor. I said hello! Naive as I was, I thought would try and make friends in this new world of death and destruction. I was wrong. The first guy said hello and we chatted for a minute and immediately he started punching me and killed me. Did I learn my lesson? Nope. Next life I tried again to say hello and was shot immediately by a guy with a BK. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. So now I feel pretty shameful and I learned that it’s not a place I’m going to make friends so I change my mentality immediately. SOS becomes my new mentality. Shoot on site from now on. First person I see, I shoot immediately. No talking. Same with the second. Then I die of starvation because I have no idea how to start a fire or feed myself. No idea how to stay warm or pretty much do anything. I was many many YouTube videos and my wife starts watching me play. She constantly reminds me to feed my character and slowly helps me stay alive. She loves the game so much, I went and bought another Xbox so we could play together. We have more fun than ever. Camping in a lodge in the forest while she cooked the food was pretty relaxing and we went on a great adventure together. Then I got sick from cholera and died. She never died once! Not even at the beginning. She was a natural right from the start. I grind my way back to severograd where she was and we continued our journey. We went down to dubrovka for some water and to loot the town. At this point, we learned to play on a low pop server and we hadn’t seen anyone since we had been playing together for almost a week at this point. All of a sudden she sees a car roll by and we literally shit ourselves and hide. We wait….. All of a sudden she scream “holy shit I’m dead” I never heard a shot… Then my screen goes black and I’m dead.. I felt a feeling of loss like never before. My character was so built up and we had learned to live off the grid completely. It took me a day to get over that first death. Back to the coast we go. I bought my own server and we learned to play the game without the potential of being murdered but after 2 weeks, we were ready to get back on official and try our luck again. This time we thrived and we managed to get all the way to sinistok. She logged out and I stayed on and went to the camp at the bottom of the ski hill to loot that area. Just as I was done going through the camp, I decided to make a stop in the pub and I hear a car roll up on me. 3 dudes get out and start blasting the zombies and I begin to feel the end is coming near. I plead with them not to kill me but they were in a group chat and they couldn’t respond to me which I didn’t realize at the time. I say something along the lines of… Oh fuck I guess i’m gonna have to fight my way out of this one. I was upstairs crouched down behind the door not realizing one of the guys had me in his sights and I was already dead… Screen goes black.. I’m dead. I had a crossbow so I was gonna lose no matter what. I wanted revenge so I made this server my home. I wanted to find those guys and get them back. I found a noob tube and carried it from that moment on and had in my mind that any car that ever rolls up on me is getting that piece. submitted by canuckguy666 to DayzXbox [link] [comments] Fast forward a month or so to last night. By now I’ve become quite good. I roll with a crew of 7 guys on this server and every person I meet I ask if they were my pub killer from a month or so ago and I’ve never found him or her. I learned to play like a spider. I have a small base that’s booby trapped to hell with about 20 land mines and trip wires and I basically stick to that area and loot in that area. I know it like the back of my hand so I know what explosions to listen for. I’m at the Northern camp of NWAF and I hear three loud booms coming from my base. I run back as fast as I can to find 3 of my tripwires have been tripped and a cut up body is on the ground. My first confirmed trap kill. Someone else had to have been there to cut that body up so I searched the area looking for them. I found nothing. I reset the traps and planned to log off for the night but stupid complacent me decides to go into my base to unload my loot. As I begin to unlock my first lock I get shot. I try to run and I get hit two more times. I’m dead. I have another character at that base inside for this exact scenario so I wait the 5 minutes and load in. I get a message from a guy asking me if I just died. I say yes! Was it you? He tells me it was him who I got in my trap and he needed some revenge but he feels bad which is why he reached out. That character he killed was loaded up. I invite him into a chat and congratulate him on his kill. That was the first time I’ve died since the Pub incident. So obviously I asked him if he recorded my kill which he did and sent it to me. We laughed and had a good chat and I ask him if he was in the crew of guys who shot me a month ago at the pub with his buddies and he tells me it WAS HIM!!!! He was the one who shot me and he has the video saved somewhere. I’ve been talking about that death like a whiny little bitter ass for so long now and to finally know I got him back with my trap made me so happy. He’s up one on me mind you but after talking for about 15 minutes, we make friends and he comes back to my base and gives me all my shit back for my character and watched my back while I opened my base up and put everything back in there. Integrity is hard to find these days so it’s not something I would have normally done due to the previous encounters. I made a new friend in the end and based on his video that he sent me of him killing me, I’m glad. What an incredible shot he hit… Thanks for reading my novel. This story was too good to not tell. I fucking love this game. Happy hunting. I clipped three vids together. Me showing up to my base and seeing the dead body. Me getting shot from my POV and him Sniping me from his POV. Enjoy! |